#going ham

[gargoyl3city]

Anotha

[ap-sadistics]

shes in

[undead-knick-knack]

The Stormlord rolling up on Aeor

[narcoticwriter]

I'm Finally Breaking My Silence.

I can't take it anymore. Someone has to know about this. It's been years since the realization dawned on me and years since I've kept my lips sealed, but I can bear it no longer.

It makes no fucking sense how the tall Genshin women have heels.

This is a meme, but I'm also on something else entirely. Maybe it's delusion.

I don't care if it's for the fanservice, I don't care if it's hot, and I certainly don't care if people like it because it makes no sense whatsoever.

I don't know how people can run around in varying landscapes and roads on heels. I don't know how the heel itself would survive such treatment. And I don't know how the wearer, no matter how skilled, would not trip and fall on their ass.

Some instances can be afforded more forgiveness than others, but this will not stop me from compiling a list of how I feel about them individually and as people:

Actual Insanity -

Beidou: The Alcor is a wooden boat. One day, that heel is slipping through a small hole in the floor, snapping off, and sending her careening across the starboard. Someone's going to laugh. And then they will be tossed into the brine before being pulled back out and promptly begging for forgiveness. I cry.

Jean: The Gunnhildrs are masochists. The pain is worth it for Mondstadt, as always. How does she do it, running around everywhere and carrying the Knights of Favonius on her back? There's no way that she doesn't kick off the boots while sitting at her desk when it becomes too much to bear.

Dehya: When she says that she wants to slay on the battlefield as much as her looks, I did not think that the shoes would also be a thing to consider. And in sand? Are you mad? Those heels are sinking. No wonder her burst cancels when she jumps. Imagine having to rework your precarious footing every single time.

Yelan: This sick woman unironically likes it. She probably enjoys the sensation of pain every single time it becomes borderline pleasurable. It doesn't help that she looks forward to it being treated too. Herbalist Gui is getting really sick of having to wrap her feet in gauze after slathering it with medicinal foot cream.

Rosaria: I don't know if she's capable of caring anymore, actually. She doesn't seem to process this the same. The woman has an aesthetic to commit to and she doesn't do anything halfway, including her fit. She says she doesn't get drunk, but you know damn well that it and the nicotine numb the pain.

Eula: Anyone who says that they can do reconnaissance work and wear those things is lying, and Eula Lawrence is no exception to this rule. To add insult to injury, she also has spurs on them. Spurs on those beasts of shoes. Respectfully, she needs to twist her ankle and be put on bedrest for the day, so she can think about it.

Candace: I can't believe that this mentally brought me to my fucking knees. How dare you? You live in an area that is mostly sand and dust! You go out in the night and kill things! You're constantly out and about taking care of things! WHY ARE YOU IN SUCH HIGH HEELS?!?

Shenhe: (head in hands) I don't even know if she knows that this isn't normal to wear. I'm going to Cloud Retainer's domain and demanding that she be put in something that makes more sense. She lives in the mountains for Archon's sake! She may not act entirely human, but trust me, she is one at the end of the day.

It Makes Some Sense -

Kujou Sara: She's won, actually. Geta are allegedly much more comfortable to wear than heels. She slays, stays stylish, and isn't suffering while doing so. Good for her, because this is one of the only wins she has in a long, long list of L's, mostly attributed to Yae Miko if you take the time to really look at it.

Lisa: Is she really going to be running around all that much? No! Because she has her little helpers to go around and do things for her. And even if she has to go around by herself, she does so at a rate that isn't breakneck speed. Also, I personally believe that she has some potions and enhancements to help out with it.

Ningguang: She barely gets a pass. Barely. I personally don't believe she takes that walk around the pier every day. It's every other day at the most consistent. At every other function, you can trust that she has a seat and that she's not on her feet. She can afford to have such accommodation.

Raiden Shogun: If her body wasn't a puppet that she made for herself, I would absolutely put her in the other category. She absolutely made sure that she wouldn't feel pain while wearing those things and it shows with how she's able to move like she does in combat.

Yae Miko: I won't call it foul and say that since she can shift into a kitsune form, she's not going into this category, but provide the proof in other ways. Do you really see her going anywhere in a hurry? Precisely the point. She could probably get away with people carrying her places.

[AAAAAA] -

Arlecchino: I have no words for the atrocity that is those heels. None at all. If I think about them too much, I'll start frothing at the mouth, and not in any good way.

Conclusion - My heart weeps prematurely for Clorinde and Navia. Fontainian fashion can kiss my ass. I mourn their feet.

[tiganas]

Al Pacino chewing the scenery in Dick Tracy (1990)

[spacevixenmusic]

Source: ThunderCats [2011]

[wouldyourfavepaychildsupport]

Would "going ham" pay child support?

Source

[gardenerer100]

[frogmascquerade]

and when ruby sunday's birth mother is revealed to be petronella osgood? What will we do then?

[medusablackstar]

locking tf IN AND STAYING LOCKED.

[michaelworthy25]

HAM On Cheat Day

[monotcchi]

EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU TO KUI-SENSEI FOR THE HAPPY NEW YURI!!!

[thoodleoo]

there are very few ancient artifacts that make me more emotional than roman tombstones that thank the reader for stopping by and wish them well. there's simply something so sweet and gentle to me about imagining a traveler stopping along the road to read someone's final dedication and being sent away with the blessings of a thankful ghost

[narcoticwriter]

Can These Guys Do Basic Math?

I blame Sin for this.

Brief and buckshot (let me emphasize this again, brief and buckshot) explanations under the cut, I did not THINK and I'm doing this for the funny, watch for some spoilers to the story and characters here or there though:

Dr. Faust: At this point in what I know about the canon, I do not believe he genuinely cares any more.

I-No: As a manifestation of humanity's hatred for the Gears turned into a literal god, I think that she is beyond math.

Happy Chaos: The kind of fucker who'd instigate something about the numerical value of three actually being fifty-five.

Ramlethal Valentine: "I was made with the capability to compute and solve a multitude of problems concerning algebra, trigonometry, statistics-"

Testament: They would scoff at whoever asked, then make an offhanded comment about how stupid that question was or an insult at the one who asked.

Bedman(?): Both Bedman and Delilah would openly call them twenty words that mean some variation of 'absolute imbecile'.

Asuka R♯: Math is a hobby to this guy, he would be more confused than insulted if you knew him even casually.

Slayer: The man has not been alive for this long and amassed this much power by being a chump. Please.

Sol Badguy: If the man of science didn't know how to do basic math, I'd wonder how he did it all in the first place.

May: Well now, someone has to keep track of how much money Johnny blows at the casino.

Millia Rage: A job requirement, if I'm being completely honest.

Zato-1: Debated putting him in the 'math is fake' tier, but decided that he has to use too much of it to be there.

Anji Mito: A man like that has to keep his ducks in a row and his math is an example of this because he's taken how many risks now?

Jack-O Valentine: I believe that she has to know some math and fairly well at that given her situation and by exposure.

Ky Kiske: I choose to divorce his knowledge from his application of it. This man is doing just fine on the fundamentals. So sue me.

Potemkin: With all due respect, I think the fact that he's here is monumental of the work Gabriel put in. The man is quite competent.

Leo Whitefang: How else would he be able to keep count of the dead and his sins accordingly?

Nagoriyuki: I think he gets by, but I don't see him in many situations where he would have to go beyond some basic algebra.

Elphelt Valentine: Can keep count of potential suitors, the tickets sold, and other things of that priority. Also a Valentine.

Queen Dizzy: Testament saw what Sol did to Sin and gave themselves a pat on the back.

Axl Low: Clearing up the streets and making them safe was a bit higher on the list of things to do while he was growing up, you know.

Giovanna: Would rather not, to be honest, but she can.

Goldlewis Dickinson: I DON'T HAVE TO THINK ABOUT IT-

Bridget: Off of sheer vibes alone, I don't think she thinks all that much outside of bounty hunting.

Chipp Zanuff: His intuition has done him many favors, but doing the mental math isn't one of them. I also blame the drugs. He can try.

Baiken: Controversial in the sense that at a certain point, I think she just stopped learning normal things for her age and hit the road. Could pick it up, but mostly for like, money and managing her stuff.

Johnny: Extremely selective, will ensure that his girls are taught right, but what there's no way I gambled away that much!

A.B.A.: If she's calm, sure, but God forbid someone looks at Paracelsus for a bit too long.

Sin Kiske: Sol may have kept him alive, but he failed him in every other way that matters. What do you mean he's still learning his time tables?!?

[tiganas]

There is ONE Al Pacino - Dick Tracy (1990)