#Shang Qinghua is about to die basically

[whos-the-seme]

Shen Yuan is actually a cuddle bug. Had a ton of Luo Binghe body pillows back home not just for the merch reasons but because he needs something in his bed to squeeze when he's sleeping.

Since he started having weekly planning (boozing and bitching) sessions with Shang Qinghua, he sometimes accidentally sleeps over. After he's finished his paperwork and started on some of Qinghua's, sometimes the wine gets to him and he's just so sleepy. Or, sometimes, Shang Qinghua will let the other read some of the short stories he had written early on in his transmigration when fighting to not lose his mind. Shen Yuan would critique them, before harassing him to publish them anonymously.

("Oh, so you are capable of writing more than papapa trash."

"Aw, you like it?" "...it's good." 🙄)

But by the time he finished them, it would be so late, and it didn't make much sense to leave when a bed was right there. And Shang Qinghua had custom ordered goose feather pillows and blankets, which was so unlike his porcelain pillows, and Shang Qinghua himself is right there. Therefore. The man himself becomes his new object of comfort when asleep.

At first, Shang Qinghua used to just wave it off. Then he started to playfully complain and tease about how clingy Shen Yuan was in his sleep, and Shen Yuan would grumble and turn bright red and turn his back on him... only for them to wake up with Shen Yuan basically curled around the other like an octopus in the morning. And then it just became normal because, of course, they really only had each other, so like why not? It brought them both comfort and two people could totally cuddle platonically.

Before long, more than half the week, Shen Yuan was spending the night over, and some rare times, Shang Qinghua goes to the bamboo house. Shang Qinghua learns when to give up his piles of paperwork when his friend starts getting tired and to get more fucking rest himself. Otherwise, Shen Yuan will just walk in, curl up on his lap with his head resting on Shang Qinghua's shoulder, and fall asleep there.

("Really? I ordered those extra stuffed pillows for you, you know. Go to bed, I'll be done in a minute."

"Ugh, shut up, sleeping isn't the same when you're out here ordering new fighting posts for Bai Zhan Peak for the 5th time this month. I'll just wait here for you to finish."

"In my lap...? That's kinda gay--" 😏

"Qinghua."

"Shutting up and finishing the work." )

Those of An Ding Peak, being the peak that was basically the backbone of the entire sect and kept it running through sweat, blood, and some other bodily fluids, knew how to keep secrets from other peaks. You don't become a disciple there without knowing how to keep your mouth shut when outsiders are around. But between each other, whispers abound.

"I don't think Shen-shibo has left in two days," one disciple murmurs to another when they see Shen Qingqiu flouncing around yet again, ordering one of the disciples to bring some two small meals to their Shifu's rooms for a late dinner.

"Do you think they're... you know?" Another asks quietly after delivering some new contracts to their Shifu. The door to his bedroom had been slightly ajar, and through the cracks, green leaf-pattern outer robes were on the ground.

("I'm not sleeping in these, okay! You should have written in pajamas while you were busy adding in chocolate, and whatever else doesn't exist in Ancient China, to PIDW!" 😒

"Oh my god, just sleep in your inner robes, then! Better yet, borrow some of my clothes. But you're sure as fuck not sleeping naked on my silk sheets, bro!")

The disciples on Qing Jing Peak certainly notice when the bamboo hut isn't occupied for the night. At first, they just thought that their Shizun was extra silent in his house now, but once, Ming Fan had to go to Shizun for a small issue late in the evening, and he wasn't there. Nor was he there the next night, or the next. They're not sure where he is, or what he's doing, but he's always there in the morning, so they don't worry too much.

On the fourth night, Shizun was home, but Shang-shishu was also there. And... stayed there. The lights went out, and the disciples who were sent out to spy came back and reported that Shang-shishu had never left.

("He... is Shang-shishu still in there?"

"I think so. M-maybe he stayed in the extra bedroom?"

"..." 👀

"..." 👀)

The disciples eye each other and simultaneously agree to never let those outside the peak know about this. When crossing paths with A Ding disciples, there are discreet looks and nods of understanding, and they pass each other by with not a word.

(Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghua?)

----

One bright and sunny morning, Liu Qingge slams his way into Shang Qinghua's office. He is followed by Mu Qingfang, and Yue Qingyuan, all needing to speak with Shang Qingqua to figure out Shen Qingqiu's whereabouts. He wasn't in his bamboo hut this morning, nor was he anywhere else that he typically frequented.

Mu Qingfang because it was time for his bimonthly check-up to ensure that his treatments with Liu Qingge were progressing as they should. Yue Qingyuan due to peak matters (though, technically, he could do it on his own, but if he got to see Xiao Jiu--). Liu Qingge because the beast that he had dropped on his doorstep yesterday afternoon had yet to be removed, which was odd. And also, he had ordered new fighting posts a week ago, and usually they would have been delivered by now, which was also odd.

Wei Qingwei and Qi Qingqi also follow along because they could smell drama. And also they were a tiny bit worried about their shixiong. Whenever he disappeared for too long, it was likely that he had gotten kidnapped or poisoned. Again.

Shang Qinghua scrambles out of his bed chambers with hastily thrown-on outer robes, blurry-eyed, screaming "Whoosit!?" He barely has time to open his mouth before he is instantly bombarded with several requests, most of them pertaining to the apparent missing peak lord. Liu Qingge also asks about his fighting posts, which Shang Qinghua pretends not to hear.

"We've not seen him in a few days," Mu Qingfang says to him over the noise, with an apologetic smile for waking up his overworked shixiong. "I know you two are somewhat friends, so if you see him soon, please tell him he really needs to come to Qian Cao for his next physical."

"Wait, who's missing? Ah, please don't touch that." The last part is directed at Qi Qingqi, who is combing through his shelves. "Shen Qingqiu is apparently missing, according to this bunch," Qi Qingqi says, smirking at him. She pokes the figurine he told her not to touch. Oh well, she'll realize why he told her not to touch it soon enough.

"Shen Qingqiu? What do you mean, he's--" Shang Qinghua instantly closes his mouth, hoping that no one heard that. "I-I mean, yeah, I'll let you guys know if he stops by! No problem, will absolutely send him your way--" "What was that?" Liu Qingge narrows his eyes at him. "You were about to say something. You know where he is. Tell me."

Shang Qinghua begins to sweat immediately. "Whaaat? No, you must have heard wrong. Seriously, I'll let you guys know if I catch him. Now, if you guys can be on your way--" He starts trying to herd people out.

Unbeknownst to him, his bedroom door cracks open and a figure, eyes barely open, shuffles out and heads towards him. Wei Qingwei, idling in the office, is the first to notice the person wearing another set of An Ding Blue outer robes over soft Qing Jing Green inner ones. His jaw drops.

"Qinghua?" A soft, sleepy voice murmurs in his ear, arms circling around his waist and a head laying on his shoulder from behind. "It's too early, come back to bed." A small yawn.

Shang Qinghua can feel himself freeze with a nervous smile on his face.

Shit.

[zebratimw]

Spirit animal SQH

[sunderwight]

SV AU where, while Luo Binghe is supposed to be in the Abyss, Shen Qingqiu comes across a hellhound puppy.

Now, there is an arc in PIDW where Luo Binghe became a hellhound. But it happened like at least a century out from where they are in the timeline, after Binghe had come into his full demonic power, and involved him turning into a slavering beast that eventually become a slavering man-beast (werewolf, basically) who could only be cured by having a lot of very questionable sex with his wives. Shen Yuan wrote a rant about how yet another potentially interesting transformation arc was instead reduced to porn tropes, but it was one of several dozen such rants across many similar story arcs. Airplane barely even remembers writing it because he was having a pretty shit week and just wanted to get the chapters out.

So it doesn't really occur to either him or Shang Qinghua that finding a hellhound puppy might be suspicious. Unexpected, sure, but demons are turning up all over the place all the time, really. And it's years before Luo Binghe is even supposed to be out of the Abyss, like a century before his hellhound transformation story, and when Binghe did turn into a hellhound his two forms consisted of a fully-grown beast and a fully-grown man-beast. Not a puppy.

Of course: that hellhound puppy is definitely Luo Binghe.

He unwittingly triggered this subplot early, and because he's still a young adult, he gets stuck in a juvenile puppy form because hellhounds don't reach fully maturity until they're like fifty.

Anyway, this creates something of a pickle for Luo Binghe, because he's legitimately stuck in this form and can't figure out how to change back. This is not part of his plans. He's fleeing from Huan Hua Palace cultivators who are trying to kill him, which they might succeed at because his Heavenly Demon powers don't seem to be working.

He runs right into Shizun, who is on one of his "investigate stuff to forget the depression" field trips with Liu Qingge.

Luo Binghe is fully expecting his righteous Shizun to kill the demonic beast, and has a moment to think that at least that's better than being killed by Huan Hua, before Shizun rescues him instead.

Shen Qingqiu, meanwhile, is actually kind of excited. There was a lot of lore in PIDW about how hellhounds can actually make loyal companions if they're trained up from young enough of an age, but finding hellhound puppies would be difficult for anyone who wasn't a demonic nobleman, and most of the "trained" hellhounds just disappeared into the harem as gifts to various demon wives and were never seen or heard from again. No additional information, like the full extent of their abilities or what kind of companions they made beyond "loyal" or anything! A species of demon that could even potentially be domesticated by humans, and it was just left at that?!

Needless to say, Shen Qingqiu's not letting Huan Hua Palace kill this one. This is a rare chance for him to get a cool monster companion!

Although... such a creature might die when Luo Binghe comes to take his revenge.

Well, he'll deal with that when he has a chance. Maybe Shang Qinghua can take it to Mobei Jun or Shen Qingqiu can find another place for it before then. In the meanwhile, at least going back to Qing Jing Peak with him is better than being killed on the spot. He talks Liu Qingge into going along with it (Liu Qingge thinks he's insane but also folds like wet tissue paper), under stipulation that the hellhound's demonic energies are sealed and it gets muzzled before they bring it back with them.

Shen Qingqiu rides with it in a carriage, and feels so bad for the poor doggo looking miserable without his demon powers or even his mouth free that he secretly takes the muzzle back off while Liu Qingge isn't looking.

Luo Binghe is overwhelmed with the mixed sentiments of confusion (doesn't his shizun hate demons? is a Heavenly Demon really so especially repulsive to him?), happiness (he's going home! Shizun found him and is taking him home!), worry (Shizun please do not un-muzzle random demonic beasts just because they look sad!), and some rather embarrassing personal revelations about the appeal of being Shizun's pet. The latter situation worsens exponentially after the first time he gets good boy'd and petted for the first time.

Regardless, Shen Qingqiu does take him back to Qing Jing Peak and settles in to train and observe his new puppy. No one thinks this is precisely a good project but it is a project, and is not for instance "staring blankly into the distance while kneeling in front of a sword mound", so on balance everyone decides they'll just keep an eye on things and make sure the hellhound doesn't maul the peak lord. Lots of "just dropping in for a visits" by a rotating cast of peak lords (they have a schedule).

But the hellhound puppy is a fabulous pet! Actually, Shen Qingqiu thinks it's really remarkable how smart and readily tamed he is? Barely a few days in and he's obediently following Shizun's commands, except for "stay", which he seems to struggle with. He doesn't maul or threaten any of the disciples, only growls at Shang Qinghua sometimes and makes a few aggressive displays at Liu Qingge. The former case is just good taste, and as to the latter, well, clearly the hellhound is sensitive and intelligent, and has a more-than-rudamentary understanding of words spoken to him. He probably remembers that Liu Qingge wanted to kill him when they first met. Shen Qingqiu takes his time soothing his puppy and assuring him that he won't come to any harm, he's perfectly safe on Qing Jing Peak with Shen Qingqiu.

At least, for now.

Although actually, the more Shen Qingqiu thinks about it, the more convinced he becomes that Hellhound (sue him, he's not the best with names) would be a perfect companion for Luo Binghe once he gets out of the Abyss. The only difficulty would be in how to convince Binghe to accept him, and also how to keep his now-loyal hound from trying to defend his master when justice comes due. Shen Qingqiu figures he'll cross that bridge when he comes to it, and in the meanwhile takes some time to explain to Hellhound about his disciple, Luo Binghe, who is enduring a terrible trial in the Abyss, but who will return one day having become Emperor of the Demon Realms and could probably use a steadfast and intelligent companion who is interested in more than just his incredible amounts of power or irresistible good looks.

Luo Binghe Himself: ?!?!?!

[jinlin-at-the-moon]

so a few days ago i was thinking about this post+comic, and i thought that while svsss luo binghe probably wouldn't try to Actually kill liu qingge, pidw luo binghe absolutely would. ergo, imagine, if you will. an au where peerless cucumber doesn't transmigrate in as shen qingqiu, but airplane still becomes shang qinghua. due to plot differences, airplane-bro doesn't really care about what the hell kind of drama the other peak lords are getting up to, but still somehow happens to knock over a book or something- something that, through bullshit plot contrivance butterfly effect, somehow manages to let shen jiu actually save liu qingge in the lingxi caves.

some years pass, years where liu qingge is going through a fantastical knightly enemies to ??? where he slowly learns he may have initially misjudged this man who may not be the paragon of virtue but is nonetheless a person worthy of respect with a possible sordid past that resulted in a difficult disposition and now has to kneel down and admit then make up to his failures, as shen jiu is like "what kind of fucking scheme is he trying to pull", which results in like a weird strained kind of coworkers who Don't Talk About It type relationship. the immortal alliance conference still happens, everything proceeds as in canon, except- when bingge comes back from his 5-year internship in tartarus and does his pidw-canon-typical "destroy shen jiu's reputation and lock him up in the water prison" shenanigans, it turns out that liu qingge Can and Will try to break shen jiu out -not because he really likes the guy all that much, necessarily, but he has a life debt to pay back and also has already dragged his one (1) braincell through the grinder in order to realise his assumed-evil coworker is probably not actually one-dimensionally evil, so he feels complicated enough about it to try and get some actual answers in here - and if that involves kicking demon ass that's just a fun bonus. normally, all this would not be an issue for demon emperor luo binghe who has recently basically come into nigh full power if you discount xin mo being grumpy, because, as established he would not hesitate to kill his former shishu! in fact, he'd be very glad to do that! however, for item out of designated boundary reasons, liu qingge Will Not Fucking Die.

...cue clown music.

liu qingge has already sacrificed his last braincell to trying to comprehend his shattered worldview of shen jiu as a person and therefore he does not examine why he is Actually so determined to break him out, and also doesn't have enough brainpower to feel torn by the fact that duelling luo binghe every week is actually kind of fun (and also why he kind of has a boner about it). shen jiu has a moral crisis about the fact that the man who he's first hated then avoided for like over a decade is now the one guy who keeps trying to legitimately come back for him and is willing to risk death over and over in order to do that, and also that somehow this pisses the beast off enough to distract him from the whole revenge/ripping off limbs thing- except now he's for some reason coming down to the water prison to rant about it? luo binghe, for his part, does not know why he's ranting about it to shen jiu of all people (it started as taunting! then it became some kind of weird routine because that one guy just cannot cease being alive and what is UP with that) and while he does have enough braincells to question why fighting liu qingge every week feels more stable than any other relationship he's had in his life since his mother died, he absolutely refuses to examine it. none of them are making it out of this normal. the clown music gets louder every time they're in one location. huan hua keeps having to dish out more and more repair funds for the bai zhan war god's going ham most destructive. the three clowns are locked in a mario/peach/bowser dynamic stalemate none of them actually want to be in, but it's what fate has dealt, and some god is probably laughing at their miseries.

(meanwhile, god is not laughing. god is wondering what the fuck happened here and how it got to this point and also if this means he might put some of his fake-his-own-death plans on hold just to see what kind of bullshit happens next. ...god also really wishes he could invent popcorn.)

[mymoshangthoughts]

something i think about with regards to og!shang qinghua

i totally think he smashed mobei jun's face in with the rock

like okay the scene plays out basically the same, except instead of thigh-hugging, the original goods was groveling and hiding and dodging and only BARELY managed to survive for long enough for mobei jun to faint

so here he is, surrounded by corpses and a fainted demon and theres this big ass rock over there and he's like "yeah, thats the pragmatic thing to do"

but see, airplane and the original goods both vastly over-estimated the ability of a rock to kill a demon lord. so yeah, mobei jun has a nasty broken nose and he wakes up feeling like death warmed over in the middle of the woods but he's alive (this is btw the exact reason that the system was willing to let airplane do it, bc it wasnt gonna kill mobei jun anyway and it was what the og goods did)

and he was JUST conscious enough to see the original goods bash his face in

so mobei jun is sitting there like "okay, yeah, so imma find that fucker and imma enslave him and then when he runs out of use to me, imma kill his ass" because he's angry enough right now that simply killing og!shang qinghua just does Not feel good enough

and their relationship over the years is basically a big game of cat and mouse with them trying to fuck each other over. mostly the original goods trying to kill mobei jun and mobei jun just like "no imma wait to kill him until AFTER ive had a thorough revenge but fuck he makes it tempting to kill him right now" and og!shang qinghua highkey actually reminds him of his uncle. they're both the two-faced type who can smile to your face and stab you in the back and he's sorta thinking "if i cant resist killing one stupid human until the opportune time, how am i going to not kill my uncle??"

and basically it's just like..... lowkey shizaya (drrr!) vibes between them? and look, mobei jun is Very satisfied when he finally kills that worm og!shang qinghua but he also feels a certain loss because even though theres srsly no love lost between them, the original goods was basically mobei jun's companion for longer than anyone else in his life (enemy? frenemy? rival????) and it's just a sort of weird empty feeling after he's dead

and i just like thinking about how Different their relationship was because i like thinking about all of the changes that airplane accidentally created because he really didnt know that much about their original relationship. og!shang qinghua was such a footnote in the novel that there really wasnt any time spent on "oh yeah, og!moshang has a super weird hateship and shang qinghua did backstab mobei jun but that wasnt actually NEW, og!shang qinghua tried to kill off the king of the north at least once a month or so"

anyway i think the distinctions in the relationships are important for moshang reasons, because airplane and og!shang qinghua ARE different people, so they had to have made different decisions over the years, and those differences are why mobei jun was very much in love with airplane and not in love with og!shang qinghua

(altho i do enjoy og!moshang, but i will die on the hill that their relationship is different and whatever love might exist between them would be different. my hcs might not represent accurately how og!moshang's relationship was canonically but i just think it's important to make those distinctions)

but all these thoughts lend themselves to "what if pidw!mobei jun met airplane!shang qinghua?" because look, if they really were collaborating for so many years, he would KNOW og!shang qinghua. and as such, it wouldnt take him long to be like "okay but you're seriously NOT shang qinghua tho?!?!" and i love his confusion. like i dont think he'd show up and be like "guh, shang qinghua, gotta kill that rat again", i think he'd show up and be like "......well thats definitely shang qinghua's skin but that sure as fuck isnt shang qinghua"

and look, i want the chaos of that.

pidw!mobei jun and svsss!mobei jun discussing why the fuck shang qinghua is a completely different person and coming to their own conclusions (also naturally realizing a thing or two about cucumber-bro bc thats the other big notable change between worlds. bing-mei is fine, pidw!mobei jun always know that bing-ge is secretly pathetic)

also potential for kidnapping? like pidw!mobei jun nabs airplane with the intention of learning just who the fuck he is. leaving absolutely no room for discussion bc he's determined to figure this shit out. or maybe he just approaches his other self directly. or fuck it, if he goes straight to bing-mei because he's like "okay this is above my pay grade, boss of this dimension will prolly have an idea of whats happening"

also double penetration with two mobei jun's and one airplane lmfao. look im a simple man with simple pleasures

altho on the note of og!shang qinghua, thinking about this diabolical fuck does have my inner villain fucker thoroughly entertained and i wanna think about au's with both airplane and og!shang qinghua in play

there's always the good ol' sibling au's (which will always make me scream to the fucking sky "why the fuck wasnt airplane given a NAME so that i dont have to make one up for him!!!"), those definitely have the appeal of i can keep airplane!shang qinghua's design the same

so lets go with.... shang jingqi (original flavor) and shang feiyu (airplane), for simplicities sake while i explore stupid au ideas lol

so lesseee shang feiyu is born as shang jingqi's twin but since qinghua is a courtesy name and he doesnt actually know og!shang qinghua's birth name, he just knows that ONE of them is supposed to become "shang qinghua" and get killed by mobei jun. and look, he tries really hard not to get attached to his twin. he's used to keeping emotional distance from family, this should be fine, easy even. his twin even has a sort of asshole personality. so if he just doesnt get attached to shang jingqi and just lets the og plot eat up his twin, everything will be just fine and he can live a peaceful life, right? RIGHT???

but ofc he gets attached. bc even tho shang jingqi has a shitty personality and might actually be the original shang qinghua who backstabbed mobei jun and deserved what he got--look, thats HIS treacherous asshole and shang feiyu is ATTACHED okay

so shang jingqi and shang feiyu BOTH wind up joining cang qiong because shang feiyu isn't gonna just leave his twin to die but also he doesnt wanna die so he's really trying to figure out a third option to figure out how the fuck to dodge this all shang-murderfest thing when one day his brother comes home from a mission like "so i might have murdered a demon lord with a rock??" and shang feiyu is going to FREAK OUT bc either that was mobei jun and he is Not Dead and Coming For Their Asses or it WASNT mobei jun and its someone who would make mobei jun Very Angry if was harmed and shang feiyu is ready to hug as many thighs as he needs to so that they can get out of this alive!!! but shang jingqi already has a bit of a murder-boner for mobei jun, even moreso when he realizes theres like Chemistry between mobei jun and his brother and just Nope. that aint happening.

shang feiyu: i am trying to keep you alive wiLL YOU PLZ STOP TRYING TO PISS OFF THE DEMON LORD?!

shang jingqi: and IM trying to protect your ass from demon cock, thank me later

shang feiyu: ?!?!?! WHAT DOES THAT WHAT

[zebra-rigel]

roleswap au with transmigrator!mobei-jun

I literally can't stop thinking about the one chapter in Feynite's Scum Villian AUs (linked at the bottom of this post) where mobei-jun and luo binghe are the transmigrators. Not Only that but Luo Binghe is presumably. the Author of Proud Immortal Hero's Way.

The story is Moshang with implied bingqiu : featuring modern Mo Bei (a dork ass gaming nerd) who dies by electrocution and transmigrates into the novel he has an abusive relationship with. And because life hates him, he becomes the doomed and shallow scum villian, the ice demon Mobei-jun.

A typical human-hating demon,[. . .]why would Shang Qinghua want to exact revenge on Mobei-Jun? Well, probably because the demon lord tried to kill him and nearly got him thrown out of Cang Qiong sect and oh, yes, abused him for years.

Obviously the way to not die in the not-so-distant future by the protagonist's hands, is by hugging the thighs of (*coughs* spoiling) a teenage Shang Qinghua. If it also unexpectedly becomes the first basic human(ha!) consideration Shang Qinghua encounters (because he never got any in the original webnovel) well, Mo Bei-jun will just live with that! (visualize mobei jun taking a moment to glare menacingly in the general direction of Earth (in the hope of radiating some potent bad vibees towards Heavenly Sky Pillar))

[note to admit that I could be misremembering details, because my true interest(and hyperfixation) lies in like: what was actually going on in the 'original webnovel' of Proud Immortal Hero's Way, because Luo Binghe as Heavenly Sky Pillar seems to be a more unreliable narrator than SQQ himself]

Highlights of this AU are:

1. Mo Bei mentioning that he couldn't understand why the protag!Shang Qinghua had tried to salvage a relationship with the original Mobei-Jun for so long. (the answer should be toxic yaoi!) I can't just- like, this is obviously a version of aeroplane!SQH with all his admiration and hopeless crushing(like in SVSSS) but the dynamics!! 2. Speculating on what will Happen after their version of the Endless Abyss? which is

the moment when Mobei-Jun tried to expose his ‘demon connections’ to the rest of Cang Qiong sect, nearly got him killed, and earned his eternal hatred.

All I can imagine now is Mobei-jun acccidentally triggering said event, staying the hell away from Cang Qiong sect but eventually being tracked down by a resentful, powerful Shang Qinghua who has all but conquered the known world, faster and quicker than he did in the original. He's even given himself a title now! Royal Advisor! Royal Advisor to what, Qinghua, everyone knows you won't answer to an Emperor, let alone a King!

When Shang Qinghua lays it all at his feet, the only one surprised is Mobei-jun. 3.The matter of Luo Binghe (that i've created in my head) It's so fucking funny to me

Link to the chapter! Please read it and come back<3 it's so good! https://archiveofourown.org/works/17041973/chapters/42597041

[happypeachsludgeflower]

Qi Rong Transmitigation AU

I've been seeing a lot of people in the various mxtx fandoms posting their fic ideas in plot outline rambles and ya know what, that seems like a fun way to share some of my ideas that I'm not currently working on (and at the rate I write will never see the light of day otherwise)!! And who knows, maybe by sharing them, it'll spark more ideas and spiral into more plot info or even a full fic!! Asking me questions about a particular plot is a sure way to get me writing.

Anyway, so today's ridiculous plot ya'll get to hate me for is the newest one I came up with the other day!! Transmitigator Qi Rong!! (I was going to ramble about one of my many fengqing au's, but I was trying to pick one and then remembered that I hadn't written the Qi Rong/svsss plot out yet and-- yea, now we get cannibalism and violence instead!!)

Basically, the plot idea is that Qi Rong (who probably has a different name, but I haven't researched what to use instead yet... maybe something green?? The characters 绿色 lǜsè was the first thing that came up with the Chinese dictionary, so we'll go with that. His modern name was Qī Lǜsè) was from modern day and died reading tgcf, ya know, as you do. And he was really pissed off by Qi Rong's character in general because Reasons ™ (I'll decide later). Next thing he knows, he wakes up as a young Qi Rong, prior to Xian Le's fall, with a fancy system telling him to stick to the plot and stay in character!!

Now there are two ways we could go from here. One, Qi Rong can have a system similar to Shen Qingqiu's that allows the ooc feature to be unlocked after a certain point, but he has unavoidable plot points similar to the abyss, which would probably be the burning of Xie Lian's temples and/or the gilded banquet, that he has to follow through with or have his account terminated, i.e. die.

OR (and this is the one I've been brain rotting on because so. much. angst!! ...don't mind me I just like overdosing my fics on angst) Qi Rong is stuck with an asshole system that has decided he has to stay in character and cannot deviate too much from the main plot similar to Shang Qinghua's system. Just imagine!!

Qi Rong: but do I have to commit war crime atrocities?? A-System: yes ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡" Qi Rong: ...how 'bout I make it look like I'm doing war crimes and atrocities and then just.. don't? A-System: ( ¯ ³¯)♡ no Qi Rong: brb off to plot your murder A-System: (ó﹏ò｡)

I suppose the third route would be to find a middle ground where we get a-hole system AND ooc abilities, but I have yet to have the epiphany on how to marry the ideas.

I personally think the concept of Qi Rong's internal dialogue being a constant stream of "wtf" and "why am I doing this again" and somehow, inexplicably, against all expectations, being more chaotic than OG Qi Rong with meme references and random song breaks would be entertaining. Also, the bitch is absolutely going to argue with the system every chance he can get just to be petty.

I have a lot of other thoughts on this, but I'm going to end this post here before I accentually write another 5k summary at 3am. I'll continue this another day (￣^￣ )ゞ

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 9

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

I feel so weird sitting here in the morning reading this, this has been my night-time routine for 8 chapters!

In all honesty the fic I was reading this morning just wasn't it/my brain kept coming back to my boy Shen Qingqiu, so here I am 8am on a Sunday heading into the Borderlands.

My teas are for evening- so this morning, hazelnut coffee!

ah, okay, intro to this chapter. I have been wondering how the afterlife works in this series. I hope we find out more than "the border of human and demons realms" p167

JK lol this is a physical place and not an afterlife p168

oh gosh, this is quite a mess! (Re: the political upheaval within the Cang Qiong Mountain sect as well as vs others) I kind of want to know what the side quest Shang Qinghua went on in the demon realm. p169

Oh baby Luo Binghe keeping Shen Qingqiu's corpse :( p169

okay but he also took Mo Qingfang with him so maybe they were trying to figure out a way to bring Shen Qngqiu back? p170

I would have loved to be privy to the Tea that Lu Liu was about to spill about his theories of Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu ahaha but instead we got a knock on the door interrupting p171

who is this newcomer??? Wait who's the second one?? The anticipation!! pp172-173

wait. "what year is it?" New character or??? p174

I fucking cant. Yes it is Shen Qinqgiu. but also the dramatic flair is too much RE: "faking your death is overdone, I must therefore actually die :)" p174

omg SQQ had a backup body made from the mushrooms! This is so wild. This was definitely Shang Qinghua's side quest for sure. p175

omg I can't stop laughing. What is with MXTX killing the leads and then twinkifying their new bodies. p176

it's been FIVE YEARS?!?!?!?!? p177. Oh damn, bless that he has an abundance of spiritual energy now!

He really told them his name was peerless cucumber- oh my. p178. Can we talk about how they then immediately stated he was a bottom with the Peerless "chrysanthemum, crown, flower.."p178

The hypocrite lol "It is wrong for you to profit from their misfortune" after he literally stole all the clothes on his back and a fancy fan for fun (and cultivating, but let's be real mostly fun). p180

why does everything just come back to SQQ just fantasizing about Luo Binghe's dick? We went from SQQ ranting about demon naming conventions to what he would call Luo Binghe's actual dick LOL p181

HEAVENLY PILLAR-JUN - pls end me XD stooop. p182

Meanwhile we have these demons sweating because they think this man is incredibly powerful and very unstable as SQQ laughs maniacally then slaps himself. p182 I really don't think they are wrong TBH.

oh no! I need to now what Liu Mingyan has been doing in the badlands! p184

but also SQQ assuming that Liu Mingyan is Luo BInghe's wife.

OOOOOO Sha Hualing is back! p185 I like love her as a villain, but hate her as a character. She's in a weird place for me, but I appreciate her LOL

Who the heck is this youth? p186

Jesus christ. the fact that in this moment SQQ hates Sha Hualing's nails- not because there is a kid about to get slice and diced, but because in the novel she uses them to tear up Luo BInghe's back when they fuck. I cannot with this man *face palm* p187

okay we have a name for this young master- Yang Yixuan, and this little baby is Liu Qingge's disciple! p188

learning about how Luo Binghe's cultivation works with his need to basically dual cultivate to level himself out has me officially believing that the system basically allowed SQQ to build the ideal body for Luo Binghe. he definitely has the excess spiritual power LOL p190

This interaction with Sha Hualing and Liu Mingyan tho...I really love Liu Mingyan! Wait- oh no! Not her clawing her face!!! p194

okay she did not get her face clawed

Well, my theory about SQQ building the perfect bod has more merit with the nuns now out of the picture. p197

Holy shit. he actually is strong enough to break through immortal binding cables!! p199

NOW he notices the script change LOL p201 "Shen Qingqiu had certainly never planned to fill in the gap they left behind himself. He had that old feeling of having accidentally picked up the wrong script- it made him vaguely suspicious that the scam of a System was still around"

Dang! he broke the net too! p201

and we have a small appearance by Luo Binghe!!!

Yay! I am so excited i've missed the system, glad it's back. even though it seems kind of broken lol p203

Well "peerless xiangsheng" and "senior peerless" are certainly better than peerless cucumber LOL p205

oh my. Well I mean, he's not entirely wrong is he? Re: Lu Liu's epic tale of the tragic one-sided love between Luo Binghe and Shen Qingqiu. (and this is the Tea I wanted at the beginning of the chapter, I am so happy about it). pp206-207

oh my sweet summer child "Those details aren't the slightest bit reliable, okay? 'The Truth' your sister! Even if I had no girl to fondle for twenty years, no matter how wretched I became, I wouldn't get so desperate that I'd get gay with a guy! Let alone get gay with the male lead!" p212

This Chapter LOL

This was definitely a needed pick up after we had that wretched death. But now I am so curious! I need to know how this turns into their weird but epic love story. When do these two collide??? What happens next???? (do not answer any of these questions LOL no spoilers, but I am very excited to read on).

[mycatwantstoeatpins]

Favourite MoShang fics

I’ve read something like two hundred MoShang fics in the last couple of weeks (RIP my sleep schedule) and these are some of my favourites.

bureaucratic processes (Restricted) by tciddaemina. Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Canon, Oblivious Shàng Qīnghuá, Demon Courting, Demon Politics, POV Mòběi-jūn, Cultural Misunderstandings, Marriage, Bad Communication, Crack, Explicit Sexual Content, Shang Qinghua is Empress of the Northern Demon Realm, posessiveness, Shang Qinghua is Loud

how to face your high school crush after 7 years by revesdelimonade. Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe – Office, Getting Together, First Kiss, Jealousy, Mutual Pining, Happy Ending, Oblivious Shàng Qīnghuá, Childhood Friends, Moshang Events Secret Santa 22

How to Tell if a Demon Wants you Dead: the Unhelpful Guide by Esora247. Tags: 5+1 Things, Fluff, Attempt at Humor, Oblivious Shàng Qīnghuá, Courting Rituals, Gift Giving, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, No Beta We Die Like GongYi Xiao, Post-Canon, Canon-Typical Violence, < basically violence stemming from demon lords being protective (possessive) of their humans, Mobei-Jun is whipped he just shows it in his own special way

Husband (Imaginary) by diamondbruise. Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Attempted divorce, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, extremely poor communication from all parties involved, Angst with a Happy Ending, although is it angst if it's just straight up stupid

in the stripped club. straight up "jorking it" by Volatilevore. Tags: Overstimulation, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting

no more choose than rivers (Restricted) by Val Mora (valmora). Tags: Cultural Differences, Marriage Proposal, Courtship, Misunderstandings, dowry/betrothal gift/bride price, Classism, Discussion of mpreg, historically-inspired sex education, awkwardness about sex, Fade to Black, comparative cuisine, Weddings, Canon-Typical Fantasy Racism

of love, war, and romantic reconnaissance (Restricted) by dalairei. Tags: Fluff, Misunderstandings, Humor, Demon/Human Relationships, Human Courting Customs, Demon Courting Customs, Getting Together, Oblivious Shàng Qīnghuá, Soft Mòběi-jūn, Moshang Events Big Bang 2023 (Scum Villain)

The Shang Qinghua Effect by Yuu_chi. Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Romantic Comedy, Fluff and Humor, Background Bingqiu – Freeform, cucumberplane friendship, Shang Qinghua isn't undesirable he's just dumb

Stay Acting Brave by Pip (Moirail). Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Magic School, Demon Summoning, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Rimming, Oral Sex, Size Kink, Size Difference, Loss of Virginity, accidental boyfriend acquisition

The Subtle Art of Trying to F*ck by firesandpixies. Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe – Showbusiness, Social Media, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Humor, Crack, Alternate Universe – Actors, Mobei-Jun being oblivious to his feelings, Bingqiu is a side pairing, PiningDirty Jokes, Bad Jokes, Bad Puns, Puns & Word Play

[spokspsps]

orv and svsss spoilsers i think but its the parallels between them

theres something so interesting about the themes of authorship in orv and svsss and the way both stories parallel each other but are also so like. wow.

kim dokja read twsa to survive and it was the only thing that kept him alive. he read this shitty fucking story to keep him alive.

shang qinghua wrote pidw to survive and he wrote to appease he destroyed his own art because he needed to survive and there was nothing else other than basically dragging his beloved through the shit pools

han sooyoung wrote twsa and knowingly destroyed thousands and millions in hundreds of lifetimes because she needed kim dokja to live she needed kim dokja to find some happy ending

shen yuan read pidw not to keep him alive, he didn't know people would die, but he read it because he loved luo binghe. he needed luo binghe to be happy and he loved him

kim dokja read twsa and he didnt know people would die but he read it because he loved yoo joonghyuk and he needed yoo jooonghyuk to be happy and he loved him

and my fucking god. yoo joonghyuk and secretive plotter and luo bingmei and luo bingge my fucking god do you see what im saying here like im not coherent or well articulated enough to put this into something comprehensible but do you see what im saying

[toomanyplotbunnies-sendhelp]

Hello and welcome to Day 1 of "Let's Explore My Plot Bunnies"

This little bunny has been born today (while I was thinking of my other OLDER plot bunnies) and I don't that that much detail about it - like how would the story continue past the premise of it - so I thought this would be a good first plot bunny to begin with.

Edit: As of February 6th, this fic has a title:

"Shen Jiu's forceful adoption" (You don't choose family, family chooses you)"

Here goes nothing:

So, this would be a crossover between SVSSS (PIDW?) and MDZS, where Shen Jiu (the original goods) either runs away from Wu Yanzi or kills him before the Immortal Allience Comference where he meets Yue Qingyuan again. And so Shen Jiu just becomes a Rouge Cultivator (I wanna put forward that Wu Yanzi may have messed with Shen Jiu's head and made him believe that Qi-ge truly just left him behind and didn't care an ounce to come back for him, so Shen Jiu is not exactly in a rush to find his Qi-ge again)

During the first few months on the road, Shen Jiu ends up meeting (a three months pregnant), Cangse Sanren, and her husband Wei Changze. Shen Jiu is not really in the best shame when they meet (he is kinda feral and malnourished + has a distrust towards people a mile long), so of course WWX's parents are like "I am adopting this kid right now".

Since they are worried about Shen Jiu and they want to take care of him, both try to gain his trust, and after maybe half a year, they are somewhat close.

Needless to say, once Wei Ying is born, Shen Jiu is hooked since who can resist baby!WY. Like seriously - Shen Jiu may be a bit too mean sometimes (which is mostly due to trauma and the fact that ancient China had no way - to my knowledge - to treat PTSD) but he ain't someone who would ever be capable of killing a child (I shudder when I think that Shen Jiu and Yue Qingyuan may have seen more children die/suffer than be born in their life).

So this basically ends with Shen Jiu gaining a family, Wei Ying having a big brother that is very protective of him (watch out LWJ) and, in Cang Qiong Sect, we have Shang Qinghua (aka Airplane) who is very much freaking out because "the Scum Villain is nowhere to be found, how is the plot supposed to progress now System".

Small things to note:

• Shen Jiu is about 14 when he meets WWX's parents and 15 when Wei Ying is born - which means when Cloud Recess happens Shen Jiu is in his 30s (tho he still looks like a 20 years old man due to cultivation)

•As a child, Wei Ying couldn't pronounce Shen Jiu's name, so he called him Sè-ge (瑟) which means "zither"; Shen Jiu does in fact learn and (tries to) teach Wei Ying how to play this instrument while he is growing.

•I have no idea how to handle Cangse Sanren and Wei Changze tbh. I kinda want them to remain alive (albeit very injured) after that Night Hunt just so that Shen Jiu isn't alone in taking care of Wei Ying and himself.

•I want Lou Binghe to be a Bai Zhan Desciple in this AU and both him (+ a few other deciples) and Liu Qingge to be present at Cloud Recess just to have them meet Shen Jiu (sorry Binghe, you are literally Wei Ying's age (if not a bit younger); Shen Jiu won't look at you. Liu Qingge on the other hand.... (¬‿¬) )

•Shen Jiu, upon meeting the Jins the first time: "I don't trust you. Get the hell away from me and my brother Satan."

•Shen Jiu immediately after Wei Ying is born: "I only had Wei Ying for less than 5 minutes but if anything happens to him, I will kill everyone here and then myself."

•Shen Jiu, after realizing LWJ likes his little brother: "I will be watching you very closely, mister. Don't you dare try anything with my little brother"

And this is all I have for this Crossover AU.

So what do you guys think?

Good? Bad? Very much looks like my brain is on Crack? (I personally agree with the 3rd one)

Either way, I will be stopping here for today, but if I get any more ideas for this specific au, I will try to expand on it. (I am 89% sure I will be expanding on it at one point or another)

Till next time,

TooManyPlotBunnies - Send Help

[verycharismaticdragon]

So, the poll is finally over — and it is time to reveal The Truth! (Well, eight truths and one lie, to be more precise.) Let’s get to it!

9th place: “having extremely bad sex was instrumental for saving the world” TRUE

We are starting with the least voted for option, that nevertheless bamboozled 208 people (3.3% of voters). Yup, sorry to everyone who thought a gay romance novel couldn’t possibly have bad sex. We console ourselves with the fact that it was bad for thematic, plot, and character reasons.

8th place: “straight harem novel protagonist experienced a gay awakening” TRUE

First, let me apologize to everyone for my apparently ambiguous grammar. It was meant as “the protagonist of a straight harem novel”, not “a straight protagonist of a harem novel”.

Anyway, this happened! In fact, you could say this happened twice!

You see, Scum Villain is a story of a transmigrator — a guy who died and woke up in another world. More specifically, in the world of a straight harem novel he read, in the body of a villain, Shen Qingqiu. At the time our transmigrator MC entered the world, though, the protagonist of said straight harem novel was still in his teens. So not yet a murderous antihero, and not yet a harem master, but an orphaned child who up to then had a very difficult life. And encountering a man who was kind to him, believed in him, and even protected him at the cost to himself… the protagonist of a straight harem novel fell hard.

Yup, “straight harem novel protagonist” actually refers to the male lead of Scum Villain, Luo Binghe. And, despite what 239 of our voters (3.8%) thought, he did have a gay awakening — this is basically the premise of the novel!

But wait, there’s more. In one of the extra chapters, the original version of Luo Binghe ends up in the world where our transmigrator has changed things, and accidentally swaps places with our Binghe. To the OG’s shock, the villain he tortured and killed over a hundred years ago is not only alive and kicking in this world, but is… nice to him? ?? ????? ??

…So, after a couple of days it takes Shen Qingqiu to figure out that it’s not his Binghe being moody because he got injured but a whole wrong guy, the OG straight harem novel protagonist is also not what he used to be. And beseeching this kind version of his villain to come with him.

So yeah. This happened twice.

7th place: “character who thinks ‘beat them up 3 times a day’ is flirting got his man” TRUE

Honestly, this was one of the most entertaining options to watch — both in how its placement in the poll changed, and the chaos it somehow wrought among actual Scum Villain fans in the notes.

Besties… I can’t believe you forgot Mobei-jun’s iconic “love advice”. I can’t believe you thought this was about Liu Qingge. (Also I’m pretty sure someone thought this was about Binghe and said they’ll fight me if I claim this option is true. They get a free pass however because I think being ready to rip throats for Binghe is about the sexiest quality a Scum Villain fan can have.)

Anyway — yeah, this happened. Mobei-jun and Shang Qinghua, a.k.a. MoShang, are a canon side couple. 

Sorry to the 287 of our voters (4.6%) who were like ‘i hope the fuck not?!’. In Mobei-jun’s defense, he is a demon born and raised, and that’s a ~Demon Culture Thing~. Also, more than a few things happened between him saying that with his full chest and riding into the sunset with his love interest. (Well, the love interest was riding; Mobei was pulling the cart.) And he had an unfair advantage of being his love interest’s literal ideal man… but more on this later.

6th place: “character played hot potato with his own half-naked corpse” TRUE

This option has suddenly pulled ahead of its closest competitor at around 4500 votes, but for what? Despite what 295 of voters (4.7%) thought, this also happened in Scum Villain. Sometimes you (a transmigrator) set up a spare body for yourself because you think the protagonist is going to kill you. And then you die (not via getting murdered). And then you come back to life in a new body. And find out that the protagonist has apparently been keeping your old — dead — body in perfect condition for 5 years in hopes of reviving you. And then during a comedy-of-errors-esque sequence of events you end up catching your own dead body, the clothes on which have come undone. And you understandably freak out and toss it to someone else. as if it was a hot potato.

5th place: “3 different demons made one character drink their blood on 5 separate occasions” TRUE

So first, I guess, I need to explain what’s the deal with the demon blood. A particular subset of demons, called heavenly demons, have a unique ability to manipulate their blood, even when it’s outside their bodies. And, importantly, inside someone else’s. This can be used to track the person down, to hurt them, to heal them… (And for sex, actually, but somebody has neglected to mention this to our half-demon ML.)

Anyway, there are three heavenly demons around, and all had made Shen Qingqiu drink their blood once or twice. No, the blood doesn’t have an expiration date — but since he happened to change bodies a couple of times… 

So, to the 319 people (5.1%) who thought the blood drinking was either too weird or too normal to be true: nope, our MC is the world champion in demon blood chugging.

4th place: “character's dad is a fan of a famous porn ballad starring his son and son-in-law” TRUE

Despite the fervent hopes of 5.6% of voters (351 of them!), this one is also true.

You see, the main couple’s unhinged behaviors have captivated certain creative minds, and so there’s a ballad about them. That is very popular. And very horny. In fact it’s deadass explicit RPF.

And it just so happens that Luo Binghe’s absentee demon father (in his defense, he was imprisoned under the mountain) (not to defend him too much though, once he comes back he’s a total jerk to his son), Tianlang-jun, is a huge aficionado of human culture. Books, plays, songs, you name it. And he has an especial fondness for raunchy romances. You know, exactly like a porny ballad that just so happens to be about his son and his son’s crush.

Which is how our MC ends up in a situation where his uh-it’s-complicated’s dad asks him “have you slept with my son?” and he’s like “what? no” and the dad just starts humming a song that’s about them fucking. His life is so difficult (schadenfreude). 

✨✨✨

Whew, so far so good, right? We only have the top 3 left, and the false option hasn't come up yet! And yeah, I gotta say, for a book as wild as SVSSS, the fact that six options were correctly identified as more likely to have happened than the fake one is already big. Good job!

Though, I regret to tell you, that’s where our lucky streak ends. So, allow me to present…

3rd place: “a succubus fortune teller told MC at least 5 men are in love with him” FALSE

Wait, you might say, but haven’t you defended this option before? I have, but only from the accusation that the number in it is somehow false. Excuse you, I have counted the men several times to be sure!.. that the number adhered to the popular fanon.

The story behind this option is that I thought long and hard to come up with something wild enough to match the energy of the book. In the end, I used something that happened in canon as base, spiced it up with something from fanon readings, and mashed it together in a way that (I thought) would be obvious to any reader as blatantly false — but could still snag a few unsuspecting dash osmosis in-laws. What I learned was that the SVSSS fandom didn’t read the extras enough times.

Okay, so What Is The Truth!

The truth is: a succubus fortune teller made a divination about MC’s destined partner (not who was in love with him, but rather who he had a red string of fate with), and accurately described the ML to him… without once mentioning that he was a man. (Making her prediction virtually useless to Shen Qingqiu, who at the time ID'd firmly as a straight guy and didn’t even consider this possibility... and also thought that Luo Binghe was the most heterosexual man ever, in view of the oversized harem from the original work.)

So, as you can see, the entire second half of this option was just me bullshitting. If you are one of the 387 voters (6.2%) who caught this — kudos to you!

✨✨✨

This out of the way… time to crown the victors of our ‘he couldn’t Possibly have said that’ tournament.

Without further ado, I present to you: Shang Qinghua and Shen Qingqiu, our unparalleled transmigrator duo!

✨✨✨

2nd place goes to Shen Qingqiu, our beloved main character, with the option “MC told ML that if he was his mom, he would never abort him” (TRUE)

I would love to say it makes sense in context. And, well, it makes some sense in context. But also there are reasons Shen Qingqiu won a “character we most want to study like a bug” tournament against everyone else from all three of the author’s novels a while back, and this line was one of them. (Not even the wildest thing on his resume, tbt, but my favorite weirdo moment of his wasn’t a good fit for the poll.) 

Okay, so the context for this one. At a certain point in the story, the male lead, Luo Binghe, learned that his birth mother had apparently taken the poison that would kill her unborn child (him) — in exchange for her own freedom. He already had abandonment issues up to his ears, and this was yet another thing to chip at his already shaky mental state. Eventually, after A Few More Things piled up, he had a mental breakdown of, ah, potentially world-ending proportions — and that was what it took for Shen Qingqiu to realize how miserable Luo Binghe had been the whole time, and how deeply he was hurt by Shen Qingqiu’s own actions over the course of the novel. So Shen Qingqiu resolved to (finally) take steps to show Luo Binghe that he is loved and wanted. Among other things (yes this is where our least voted option happened too), he did his best to convince Luo Binghe that his birth mother actually wanted him — that she wasn’t trying to abort him, but only took that poison to escape, and must’ve drawn all of its effects into her own body to prevent it from harming her child.

It’s only that… our most special guy decided to start that statement with: “If *I* were her…”

Anyway, as many as 478 of our voters (7.6%) unfortunately didn't believe he could have possibly said that.

✨✨✨

And finally, the 1st place — continuously since as early as 900 votes! — goes to Shang Qinghua with, “character told his love interest to call him ‘daddy’. not for kinky reasons” (TRUE)

All hail the author-god!

Oh, yeah, to explain: Shang Qinghua, a.k.a. Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky, is the second transmigrator — that our MC susses out at about 1/3rd of the story. When confronted, it turns out that he is not just another reader, but in fact the author, stuck in the world of his own novel.

For this reason, he sometimes refers to other characters as his ‘children’ — usually in his head or when talking to his fellow transmigrator.

But then at one point, when he is venting his frustration with a certain demon’s behavior (see 7th place option) to said demon… who also happens to be his most beloved ‘ideal man’ OC… he, among other things, snaps: “I’m your dad! Call me daddy!”

…Meaning, ofc, something like ‘I created you!’ So, yeah — not for kinky reasons. just for totally normal author-god reasons. 

With this, Airplane-bro has swayed 543 voters (8.7%) from the right path! Put it on his list of crimes next to child endangerment.

✨✨✨

Soooo… this is it! This has been a blast. I loved seeing everyone’s responses! Especially non-readers trying to logic out the unlogicable. I love you guys. Read Scum Villain 🫶

okay so since nobody else jumped to make this, here we go

(there's a 'see results' option for those who did read svsss at the end of the poll btw!)

(also i ask humbly to reblog if this poll caught your fancy. because most of my followers are from danmei fandoms and likely have read svsss)

[sunderwight]

Liushen AU where SY transmigrates into SJ's older brother, and subsequently nopes them right out of the slavery backstory by using his general knowledge of the story and actually being an adult in a kid's body to just leave (basically) with SJ and YQ.

SY carts them both up to Cang Qiong for the next sect trials. It's actually not all that hard, the trickiest part is getting enough to eat and finding safe places to sleep between leaving the slavers and taking the trials (SY manages just barely, with considerable help from his new little brothers.) Nobody bothers to go after them because it's before Qiu Jianluo and this style of human traffickers mostly operate by virtue of their merchandise having nowhere else to go. Chasing down runaways is an expense not worth indulging, given that most of them either come straight back or die of exposure.

Anyway, they take the trials, and as expected YQY gets chosen to become a personal disciple for the sect leader, and SJ gets chosen by the Qing Jing Peak Lord, but also as (kind of) expected (by SY alone) nobody wants SY. He's older the Yue Qi, so too old, and unlike YQ and SJ his cultivation potential isn't striking enough to make any exceptions for him.

SY, however, can't leave it at that. He's spent more than five minutes with the street kid codependency gang, so he's gotten attached to both of them. And he knows what will happen if they're left to their own devices and The Plot proceeds accordingly. (Also, they keep threatening to not stay at the sect if SY doesn't stay too, for some reason.) So with a heavy heart and internal candle lit for himself, SY heads to Bai Zhan Peak. Which is the only peak that accepts disciples by way of them turning up and refusing to leave.

SY's not much of a fighter. He actually really hates the atmosphere on BZP, he's not bad at physical cultivation (his health's pretty good in this life, ironic considering how much worse his situation was) but the random ambushes and survival-of-the-fittest stuff is just not his brand. But that's okay, because it turns out that BZP actually DESPERATELY needs disciples on the actual peak who are interested in things other than fighting and cultivating their own strength. Stuff like, filling out requisition requests for An Ding every time things break, apologizing to An Ding every time things break again, organizing schedules, browbeating senior disciples into actually teaching, educating disciples on virtually any artistic or social skill, hosting lectures on how to beat vicious beasts without just overpowering them, and etc.

Okay so some of this stuff isn't and has never actually been on Bai Zhan's curriculum but Shen Yuan is going to make this place tolerable. And stop these children from needlessly getting acid burns or lyme disease or scurvy or whatever. He keeps internally chewing out Airplane for designing a sect system that means there are a lot of largely unsupervised 12-year-olds running around the wilderness on a mountain picking fights all the time. (When he actually meets Shang Qinghua and figures him out he switches to doing it in person, of course, in twice-monthly bitching sessions that look a lot like budding friendship.)

Of course one of the worst offenders is the Liu kid, who SY would suspect was actually raised by wolves if he didn't know for a fact that Liu Qingge has a younger sister, and also the kinds of nice clothing and letters from home that strongly imply not only does he have a family, but that the family is pretty well-off. Liu Qingge is at first deeply offended by SY being a BZP disciple. He rarely fights anyone, and uses tricks and evasion tactics whenever a fight can't be avoided. And he does other annoying stuff, like pestering him about meals and baths and lecturing him on identifying dangerous plants and the early signs of qi deviation. This is not what their peak is about! He should get with the program already! Just fight stuff until you're too tired to keep fighting stuff!

Also SY's younger brother, SJ, is pure evil (at least according to baby Liu Qingge) even though his other younger brother (?) is cool and nice.

Anyway, Liu Qingge stops complaining about SY after their first mission together, where Liu Qingge doesn't lose a fight but does get into a kind of pyrrhic victory situation where he's really badly hurt, and it's SY who helps him win (correctly identifying the monster and then pointing out its weakness) and takes care of him afterwards and gets him safely back to Cang Qiong. SY expresses surprise at LQG actually being polite to him, and LQG realizes that he's been a colossal ass if people think he wouldn't be grateful to someone who saved his life, so the usual Liushen dynamic proceeds from there. Liu Qingge starts bringing SY fans he leaves behind and hunts down animals that are supposed to be useful for bolstering weak cultivation, SY invites LQG to tea and keeps the critters as pets, etc etc.

SY doesn't get the Head Disciple position, because that's only acquired via beating the current peak lord in combat and lol no. Also he's not interested in stealing it from Liu Qingge, to whom it rightfully belongs (in his mind). But that's fine, because Liu Qingge takes the position when the next generation ascends and then he lets SY exclusively handle all the peak duties SY actually likes (mainly teaching). It's perfect -- Liu Qingge gets to focus on his War God antics and occasional administration/meetings without having to deal with students his has no patience for, but the disciples of BZP don't get neglected because SY is actually teaching and organizing classes and student care. BZP hasn't enjoyed a golden age like this since it was founded!

Things are pretty good overall, but Shen Yuan knows that it's only a matter of time before The Plot shows up, and so he can't rest completely easily.

Meanwhile, the will-they-or-won't-they bets on Liushen have been going strong for a while now. The thing is, most of their martial siblings are convinced that these two are already "together", and just being circumspect about it. Those who know SY well (like SJ, YQY, and SQH) know better but think that SY's romantic obtuseness is to blame, whereas those who know LQG well (LMY, WQW, and MQF) are pretty sure that it's actually LQG's obtuseness that's the problem. Of course it's actually both of them, so efforts to "fix" matters by getting through one of their thick skulls inevitably run afoul of the other's.

An additional complication is of course: SJ doesn't like LQG (mutual), and now that he's the leader of his own peak, he wants to poach SY to come and live there. Not only so he can have one of the 2 people he trusts actually close at hand, but also because SJ also hates actually teaching the atrocious little brats on his peak, and would like to have SY come and do it for him. YQY is still a total pushover for him too, and is also now the sect leader, so YQY agrees that SY can change peaks if SY and LQG both agree to it.

Liu Qingge, of course, is a no, but he's a variable "no". He's not going to hold Shen Yuan against his will or anything.

As for Shen Yuan, it's... complicated. He doesn't really like BZP, but it's gotten a lot better than it was at the start. These days he's actually pretty proud of his accomplishments, and it's more comfortable, but it's still a rough and rowdy place with fewer creature comforts, libraries, or other appealing points than QJP. Also, if he goes to Qing Jing to teach, he can personally ensure that SJ doesn't go around persecuting any of his students!

But... SJ never lived with the Qiu family in this AU, and even though SY's not totally clear on what the PIDW backstory for SJ was, he knows he's a better guy now than the scum villain in the book was. He has a reputation for making cutting remarks, not for being an abusive snake or a lecher. SY's honestly less worried about him doing anything bad at all, and there are other people on QJP who can teach. It might even be good for SJ to promote more people to fill out a social circle he can rely on! That guy needs more friends, seriously.

And QJP really doesn't need more layabout literary intellectual types who get into pointless arguments, which is all SY would be if he went there. Just yet another nerdy scholar for the rich kids with middling cultivation that the peak favors to ignore. At least on BZP he's filling a gap.

SY is clearly torn, and the fact that SY's considering it has LQG upset, and LQG doesn't handle being upset very well, so of course they have an argument about it. SY storms off to cool his head and LQG is like, this is it, he's gone to Qing Jing Peak, I've drive him off by being too aggressive and he's probably remembering all those times I told him he didn't belong here and oh no what have I done maybe if I build him a heated bath and get him books he will come back???

Turns out that SY just went to An Ding to vent at SQH while SQH was like "I think you would have fewer problems if you and Liu Qingge just got married and my disciples could call you Shigu to your face instead of behind your back" and SY threw melon seeds at him and sulked on his fainting couch (which is always cold for some reason...)

Thus begins the Liushen Divorce Arc where SY tries to be anywhere but BZP or QJP, Liu Qingge tries to figure out what thing he can punch to fix this not-punchable problem, SJ is like "I don't see what the big deal is they should break up Liu Qingge is awful and I want my brother to teach my classes for me" like the spoiled youngest sibling he's finally allowed to be, YQY is trying to moderate this Hades vs Demeter situation and is all "well maybe SY could spend half the year on QJP and half on BZP?", and Liu Mingyan is going "I know my brother if this doesn't work out he is going to die single and pining like an idiot" and so keeps conscripting other disciples to y'know, lock SY and LQG into storage closets together (ineffective: LQG can punch through walls) or at least get them in the same room (underestimating SY's willingness to yeet himself out of windows to avoid awkward social interactions.)

By the time Luo Binghe joins the sect (as a Qiong Ding disciple), the drama is in full swing and is the main topic of gossip across most of the peaks.

[vodkassassin]

I'd love to hear more about the Wings!AU!! Wings + people are my JAM

It was a passing flight of fancy, nothing that he ever put much planning into.

He’d thought, hey, the demon wives are the ones who always get the cool additions, while the cultivators are just humans. Surrounded by all these devastating beauties with tails or horns or extra appendages, aren’t they unfortunately boring? Out classed? That’s kind of unfair, right?

If demons can have horns and tails and be devilish, then shouldn’t the other side of their coin in this world have the opposite?

So he’d dreamt up a new wife, a cultivator born of low standing who had worked hard to get to where she was. She’s lived a thankless life but her heart was too good to allow her past to darken her mindset. She was kind, and found purpose in helping others. It was that kindness that drew his darling protagonist to her to begin with, so different was it from the rest of his scheming, plotting, politically-minded concubines.

Endlessly kind despite hardship. Righteous in the way that a person of the ‘righteous cultivator of the immortal, heavenly path’ schtick was always supposed to be.

Almost angelic. And what’s an angel without wings?

It’s a very western idea, so Airplane was forced to tackle it in a very delicate manner. Not too delicately — after all, he’d already implemented other western ideas in the story, such as the vampire demon clan, so what’s one more? It’s not like anyone other than one particularly pissy forum reviewer gave a shit — but carefully enough that it soothes the last, bloody, fraying scraps of what was left of his integrity as an author.

So he’d written stipulations. Rules. The rarity, the difficult origin, the mythical nature. A condition of virtue, barely obtainable by a mere mortal, and completely unobtainable by immortals that weren’t already blessed with them.

One in a billion chance, basically.

So the kind, angelic cultivator had faced every horrid and treacherous obstacle of her life and still come out as soft-hearted as she’d been before, if not more so. Luo Binghe was smitten, obviously. How could he not be, when he hadn’t seen such kindness in either world since his poor mother?

And then, the cultivator had reached a milestone in the journey of an immortal; despite all the difficult steps of her life, she’d finally formed her golden core.

And in the formation of that seed of immortality, the blessing of the heavens themselves was laid upon this cultivator, as wings sprouted from her back. Beautiful wings, pure as her soul with feathers as soft as her heart. They fit her perfectly and were something glorious to behold.

Their emergence was painful, bloody, and near fatal. His poor protagonist was driven nearly insane with worry the entire week it had taken for the wings to fully appear, forced to leave the bedside of his newest love to hunt her down herbs that would lessen the agonizing pain.

But the cultivator woman pulled through in the end. After all, what kind of author would he be if he allowed the newest wife of his stallion protag to die a tragic death when he’d only just obtained her?

The cultivator got her wings, Luo Binghe got his angel, and the plot closed rather simply on that one. Airplane patted himself on the back for an idea well executed and continued on his way, hardly ever thinking about it again.

After all, it was rare. It would go against the continuity of his own narrative decision if he’d written another winged cultivator wife.

A one in a billion chance, mostly known only because of legends.

That’s one of the many reasons why he, Airplane, now trapped in his own train wreck of a novel as canon fodder character Shang Qinghua, had never, not once, ever given the slightest thought it could ever happen to him.

After all, him? Shang Qinghua? Destined to be a traitor? Weak in cultivation, an overworked head disciple of the logistics peak, with a feeble mind and a will that’s about as strong as wet newspaper?

Wings are for cultivators who are a shimmering diamond in a pig trough. Cultivators who work themselves to the bone in the face of all adversity and live and breath the adage of righteousness.

Shang Qinghua isn’t that at all. He’s the exact opposite. He’s sneaky and underhanded and too tired to make any effort more than is necessary. Shang Qinghua is a textbook cannon fodder villain.

Shang Qinghua is in the middle of the woods, far from any town or village or human campsite, actually meditating for the first time in ages because he’s so bored waiting for his king to come and listen to his report that doesn’t even have anything interesting of note.

Shang Qinghua is leaning against a tree when he feels something click into place in the depths of his much-neglected dantian.

Without the time to take even one more breath, his entire back erupts into agony like hot, molten metal had just been poured down his collar. Shang Qinghua falls to the ground with a quiet noise that does nothing, nothing to verbalize the way his skeleton is suddenly trying to claw its way out of his skin.

[mymoshangthoughts]

oki oki oki

so i love, you love, and we love the whole "everyone sees moshang except for moshang" thing, bc it's funny to have everyone else be like "ohwow those two idiots dont realize they're married huh"

but like

might i suggest the alternative?

idk i was rereading svsss and like, since the whole thing is basically shen yuan's pov and he's a relatively level headed dude, i can't help but think about the way that he looks at moshang

like, he really doesn't seem to have any idea that moshang could be a thing. from his pov, shang qinghua/airplane is a sniveling backstabbing asshole who gets what deserves and deserves quite a bit more thwacks and mobei jun is just kinda... there. like even after knowing shang qinghua for YEARS and being fairly close people who can confide in one another, shen yuan seems pretty fucking shocked when airplane jumps off a cliff to save mobei jun. from his pov, it's almost random. like "huh wow that is the weirdest thing i've seen all week, and airplane is NORMALLY very weird so like... huh???"

now by the time the airplane extras occur, shen yuan DOES seem to have some idea of moshang with his whole "youre just waiting for him to apologize and keep beating you" thing, but again, might i point you to the YEARS it took him to get to that point. having to see shang qinghua literally pull a death defying stunt to save mobei jun's life before he sees even a glimmer of moshang

like, when they were working on the mushroom together, they clearly spent a long time with each other. they had to travel together, they had to come up with plans together, they also likely just had social visits bc being the only other transmigrator in a world that is so fucking weird would definitely drive up a certain level of honesty and companionship

now again, shen yuan is lowkey the sort of guy who's like "i dont see gay themes even when they're reeeeaaalllyy obvious", especially with relation to himself (dont get me started on how one of my least fav mxtx themes, after the blatant crummy treatment of female characters, is the whole "im not GAY, gay is WEIRD, im gay FOR YOU, thats DIFFERENT" which winds up reflecting as internalized homophobia their protags), so it's possible that moshang is obvious to everyone who isnt shen yuan.

BUT I CONTEND THE OPPOSITE

as ive expressed before, i love "mobei jun is just fucking weird, demon courting isnt like that" headcanons, so what if no one knows what the fuck is happening between moshang. like they're just this super weird mismatched combination of people that everyone just kinda tilts their head at like "...huh, wouldnt expect to see those two together but whateves" and then proceed to not fucking care to know the answer

shang qinghua seems to have kept a purposeful emotional distance from... everyone (likely due to the whole "haha everyone here is gonna fucking DIE someday" thing) and as said above, even after years of a relationship with shen yuan, he doesn't seem to have talked about mobei jun to him much (who is, by airplane's own admission, the most important person to him in this world considering he's the only person that had airplane going "i mean... maybe i dont push the go home button?"). so no one really seems to give a fuck who he's hanging out with bc he's not exactly out here making friends

and mobei jun, i contend, is a weirdo outcast who does not know how to socialize bc his uncle is a dick LOL. also his father. and also his childhood. and other demons tend to look at him and go "fucking weird man... i think he keeps a human pet?? kinda weird but w/e, the emperor is into necrophilia so /shrug/"

so like, maybe if anyone paid attention to them, they might notice the signs of moshang, but because most people kinda dismiss them, no one knows

I CONTEND THAT THE ONLY ONE WHO DOES KNOW IS LUO BINGHE THO

mostly because i find it FUCKING HILARIOUS but also bc i like to think luo binghe's whole "youre not used to his lil human pet yet? he brings it everywhere smh get over yourself" thing was luo binghe's way of being a wingman lmfao. he wont actually help or offer advice or do anything USEFUL, but he'll allow them to hang out when he has every ability to separate them LOL and i think that's funny

altho i still like the idea of luo binghe ALSO not knowing that moshang is a thing pfff. but having him know also amuses me.

ANYWAY ONTO THE ACTUAL APPLICATION INTO MOSHANG IDEAS

now the use in modern au's goes without saying. the good ol' "wait, THOSE TWO ARE A THING?!" coming from everyone who knows them. as an example, some form of workplace romance and even tho moshang can always be seen together in the office, because they dont seem to get along and no one cares, everyone is just like "shrug, they have a project together idc". like they're more likely to think that shang qinghua and shen yuan are dating bc at least those two have secretive meetings and have been caught, more than once, talking about sex. then one day shang qinghua shows up to work with the biggest rock on his finger pfff and mobei jun has a matching wedding band or someshit and everyone is shocked. or even better, some of the romantic pre-relationship stuff starts happening at the office but it's all stuff that's kinda easily misunderstood. and since no one would guess THOSE TWO together romantically, they just come up with any other plausible explanation. "why did mobei jun send shang qinghua flowers? idk, maybe his mom died. should we send him flowers too?" its not even a 'it couldnt be THAT', it's a straight up 'THAT never even crossed their minds for a second' until it gets really fucking ridiculous lololol then mobei jun and shang qinghua are applying for the same days off and mu qingfeng in HR is like "oki what for" and has to NOT do a spit-take when the two of them are like "our wedding" or someshit lolol

LOOK I JUST THINK IT'S VERY FUNNY

now as for the post-canon application, i still find this IMMENSELY amusing. for the sake of my amusement, im also choosing to interpret shen yuan's "you just want an apology" statement to have been given without imagining that the two of them might like-like each other. he's just being dismissive because airplane is fucking weird. like "look, idk why you are into role-playing as a humble servant and idk if i wanna know, actually, i definitely dont wanna know. you two clearly dont even like each other but you're in some weird co-dependent mess of a... friendship? friendship seems like a strong word. point being, get out of my house"

no one has the slightest clue about moshang's feelings for one another (except maybe binghe lolol) and they are REALLY not ready for when suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, shang qinghua is sending in his two weeks notice for an ding peak bc "oh im the northern consort now lol" and everyone is trying to just understand WHEN and HOW

like people straight up being like "is this a prank? i feel like im being pranked?" and others like "oh they might have gotten like... fake married? is this an insurance scam? hmm"

and basically for the first time ever people are really trying to understand and think about moshang bc they are SO FUCKING CONFUSED. there are betting pools over what the REAL REASON behind this CLEARLY fake marriage is. luo binghe has put his bet on "they're actually in love and fr married" and people SCOFF. he's the only one betting that and wow, the demon emperor is clearly blinded by his own weird relationship and cant see that NORMALLY this sort of relationship would NEVER happen

(actually this could apply for modern au too pff whateves, im jsut having fun here)

inquiring minds just being like "shang qinghua, blink twice if you're being threatened, we can get you out of there". demons out here like "we should prrobabblyy find the cure for whatever potent love-poison that creepy lil human slipped into mobei jun's drink, or maybe a mind-control plant?"

stuck on whether i want moshang to be utterly oblivious to everyone elses skepticism bc they're just on their happy lil honeymoon stage or if i want them to find the confusion Deeply amusing.

moshang get-together being dramatic but not bc either of them are oblivious, just bc there are communication issues pff. theres no "i love you" "but you CANT love me" drama, instead its "i love you" "oh shit SWEET, lemme hop on your dick". i like the idea of moshang only struggling to understand one another when the pair of them are holding the other at arms length (mobei jun being a tsundere and airplane out here like "getting attached and taking things srsly IS THE ENEMY") but whenever theres like, a clear statement of intent, they're quick to let go of misunderstandings and just get on with it. now while i favor this interpretation of their characters, i find it PARTICULARLY funny in au's like this! bc it also means that the pair of them learned to understand all of their weird behavior as well. so they're still fucking weird around each other, so people really dont believe this is real. mobei jun is still just as likely to yeet shang qinghua into a death cave and shang qinghua is just as likely to literally hug mobei jun's thighs while pleading for mercy. it doesnt LOOK like a loving relationship to anyone with eyes LOL (not to say that they dont grow and treat each other better, but just having a deeper understanding of one another means they dont change behavior 100%)

which actually isnt why i find it funny lol, i just enjoy the subversion of expections. rather than moshang being oblivious to the point of mind-numbing hair pulling stupidity, it's the rest of the world x'D and then it's just moshang casually proving that nah, they're for real, and yep, they're super in love, to an increasingly confused audience

this could work really well in a celebrity au now that i think about it LOL bc celebs so frequently have fake relationships and hidden relationships and all that sort of weird shit and people love to speculate about it online. so just everyone being like "calling it right fucking now, this relationship is a publicity stunt" and literally NO ONE believes they're for real, even years into it LOL. im actually usually a person who really doesnt care for celebrity au's but tbh this prompt fits so well for that, so im sold

but it goes beyond just fans speculating online. even fellow coworkers are like "huh, weird choice of publicity stunt" and dont believe for one fucking second that moshang is actually happening. oki yeah im sold

shang qinghua - famous author turned screenwriter (does some directing and he's actually pretty good at it, has a cult following, but mainly he sticks to writing. he doesnt need that kind of stress in his life LOL). he's finally reached a sort of financial stability with his work, but he hasnt broken the habit of doing whatever the audience wants because "I DONT WANNA FUCKING STARVE BRO", and he's generally disheartened when his works that he puts his sincere vision into have a tendency to be SIGNIFICANTLY less popular

mobei jun - actor, specially known for stunts and action movies. doesnt actually have any history of scandals, other than it's known that he's kinda hard to work with. just kinda cold and distant. THERE ARE some lowkey scandals with his family tho. he's definitely a nepo baby of the industry and his uncle and father dont have clean reputations. mobei jun normally keeps a pretty big distance away from them so he's kinda like, in the splash zone but not dragged in.

shen yuan - long time fan of shang qinghua's work, even back when the hack of an author was just posting web novels, his favorite insult is to call him a sell-out bc very often his deepest criticisms of shang qinghua's works are clearly choices made for money. as an example, a perfectly directed film that he wrote and nearly brought shen yuan to tears and quickly became his favorite movie EXCEPT theres fucking product placement in NEARLY EVERY FUCKING SCENE and sometimes it makes the movie fucking UNWATCHABLE. anyway, shen yuan runs the fansite for shang qinghua and is a LITTLE BIT OBSESSED with his works, but still has a love/hate relationship with the whole thing

luo binghe - pop idol who sometimes does acting work. he's known as an all-around talent. his acting is just as good as his singing, if not better, and basically everything he tries to do is wildly successful and genuinely fucking good. he's insanely popular to a scary degree (shen yuan is only familiar with his work bc he's acted in some of qinghua's movies and sometimes qinghua uses his music, shen yuan has an overall favorable impression of the celebrity but no obsession. mostly a "oh nice, that actor is really good, that and THAT HACK AUTHOR directing is sure to make this a must-watch movie" type of fanning)

liu qingge - stunt man and martial artist. he's not crazy famous, he's more like "if you're really into martial arts, you've definitely heard of him" or "if you're really into stunt work, you've heard of him" famous. but if you don't have those special interests, you have no idea. he MIGHT look faintly familiar to you, but you're unlikely to put a name to the face

shen jiu - actor, many scandals, SO MANY SCANDALS. he's very successful, infamously difficult to work with, has so many accusations hurled at him (and a majority of them are true) that when you hear "omg did you hear abt shen jiu" the answer is "ohyeah, the red-light district thing?" and the reply to that is "nonono, that was LAT MONTH, im talking abt the abuse allegations that came out yesterday!" and so on and so forth. shen jiu is a hot fucking mess and the industry has NOT helped him one bit. he has the money and power to get away with being his worst self and he Does Not Fucking Care (he cares so fucking much, he's literally burning from the inside out)

yue qingyuan - childhood friends with shen jiu, kind of accidentally being an enabler of shen jiu's spiral to hell. he's a producer and he's very successful and he keeps paving the way for shen jiu to continue getting work and help to bury scandals and basically the dude is trying his best, but he really should be putting his foot down and sending his friend to rehab instead of helping him like this

sha hualing - actress, does her own stunts, very temperamental. difficult to work with in that she's a bit (a lot) of a loose canon. she's hyper capable though and VERY popular. not a ton of scandals other than some violent behavior. she's also very good at dancing, basically anything that involves moving her body, she excels. her and mobei have totally starred in action movies together where theyre basically "hot beefy action hero and sexy badass love interest". they have a casual frenemy relationship

liu mingyan - average fanfiction writer, huge fan of rpf. she is relatively untouched by her brothers fame and intends to keep it that way. that said, she's more than happy to utilize the gossip that her brother sometimes brings home to implement as 'headcanons' into her fanfics >:D she does not tell her brother about this pfff. she also does martial arts and she's very good, but she has no desire to pursue fame. the closest she gets to it is sometimes watching her brother on a set (while secretly paying attention to everyone else for rpf bait LOL). she is not a fan of the whole moshang thing because it separates her otp (mobing for life!) and she's also convinced that its CLEARLY fake

mu qingfang - doctor, just a normal doctor, no fame involved. but his guilty pleasure is that he enjoys looking at celebrity gossip while on break. it's just a very lowkey sort of cathartic drama that he has no stakes in and helps him destress from his very stressful job. he mostly just lurks, but he's been known to write the occasional comment if he feels he has some useful insight to contribute

ning yingying - over-worked office lady. she wanted to be a pop idol when she was younger but it just wasnt in the cards. now she just enjoys getting a little parasocially invested in celebrity gossip, ESPECIALLY around luo binghe bc she's a. a mega fan. b. they were actually classmates in highschool. she's a fierce defender of his online and also one of those people who gets kinda offended by rpf bc "HOW COULD YOU THINK THAT" but also hypocritically will read every single "rpf character x reader" fanfic she can get her hands on

ming fan - luo binghe's hater online. mostly because he also knew him in highschool and hated the guy and now he's ugly jealous of his success. he likes to spread mean rumors about binghe online, just to blow off some steam. but his stupid obsession with slandering his ex-classmate sort of grew into a genuine interest in celebrity gossip and now he's a bit of an internet troll who's a little too invested in this shit. he's not a complete asshole and there are lines he won't cross, buuut he's also one of those assholes who sorta feels like "its online so it doesnt count if im a huge asshole" and just is his worst self online. he constantly gets in fights with ning yingying online (without knowing its her) about luo binghe. shen yuan sometimes gets involved too bc while he's not huge into the binghe fandom (that place scares him) he IS big on fact checking and whenever ming fan says something OBVIOUSLY false, shen yuan can't help but go in for corrections

qi qingqi - actress, successful, very low drama. she's famous and well liked, no major scandals, just a successful woman with a good career.

zhuzhi-lang - works as his uncles assistant. he keeps track of online drama because its part of his job, sometimes his uncle has him spread rumors online too so he has a few alts that are believable fan accounts for various celebrities.

tianlang-jun - one of those people who's basically famous just for being famous. he has done a bit of everything, but it's mostly that he's a household name that makes him famous. he currently works as a producer because he finds it really fucking funny. but it's anyones guess when he'll get bored of this and flit off to do something else that catches his fancy

su xiyan - model and martial artist. she's mostly famous for her TURBULANT relationship with tianlang-jun. she's skilled at both her crafts and has success, but she has no real ambition for fame. also her career is often held back by the shitty people in her life (her ex-mentor being PRIME among them, the grooming old scumbag). she got pregnant with binghe very early in her career and gave him away for adoption for various reasons. she has a good relationship with his adopted mother, but she's chosen to stay out of binghe's life. tianlang-jun doesn't know binghe is his son LOL

meng mo - thinks of himself as a star-maker, he's luo binghe's manager and has a VERY high opinion of his skills bc he's had a few successful clients. he does however tend to give very bad personal life advice

yang yixuan - one of liu qingge's students. he's only passively aware of celebrity gossip, it's really not his thing, but he is a bit of a mobei jun fan. mostly bc mobei jun does his own stunts and yan yixuan can recognize the skill involved and just thinks the guy is really fucking cool (not more cool than liu qingge OBVIOUSLY but still cool). he's very disappointed to hear abt this clearly fake relationship with shang qinghua, he thought that mobei jun was above all that petty celebrity bullshit of fake relationships and tabloid bait

gongyi xiao - aspiring young actor, overall just a nice guy. no scandals, not really famous yet but he has a promising lil fanbase that is slowly growing. however, he does have a bad habit of answering too honestly while being interviewed which can inadvertently have bad consequences LOL (example: "so what do you think of this moshang thing?" "hm, i mean, it really surprised me? seemed out of nowhere haha, i guess good for them??" which quickly spirals into "omg gongyi xiao CLEARLY knows it's fake! he cant lie for shit! THIS IS BASICALLY EVIDENCE")

qin wanyue - binghe fan, terminally parasocial, lives off of rpf fanfiction, literally missed her younger sisters funeral to attend a binghe concert, probably needs professional help like yesterday. when the online conversations of moshang start involving binghe, she gets VERY FUCKING UPSET

little palace mistress - nepo baby pop idol. very obsessed with binghe but also in a love/hate sort of way bc he doesnt do what she WANTS him to do and she craves the obedience. she takes out her impudent rage online. she's a big mobei jun hater bc she saw the mobing conspiracies before moshang happened AND SHE SAW RED. she now wants moshang to crash and burn bc she hates mobei jun with an irrational passion. she is doing her best to sabotage whatever stupid publicity stunt this is

(ships: moshang, bingyuan, liujiu, mingling)

moshang had their own super slowburn romance of actor x director that happened over the course of years and the mutual pining was basically killing them both and they had their own dramatic love confessions and shit, but it all happened behind closed doors so no one knows any of that. all they know is that this relationship Makes No Sense and internet sleuths are very invested with UNCOVERING THE TRUTH

[cursed-angelic-art]

my ranking of domestic disaster to househusband

okay in the danmei stories I know so far, the ranking goes:

12. Zhou Zishu: Has never been seen to lift one finger towards a household chore or practical skill. When left alone WILL drink himself to death on the side of the road

11. Xie Lian: Eats moldy shit out of dumpsters. Has been known to make semi-edible food when the occasion calls for it, but then the skill seems to magically leave him? maybe it was only semi edible bc he was feeding it to starving orphans who had no other options? Can't do housing repairs.

10. Shen Qingqui: I don't want to know the state of his bachelor pad pre-canon. Also barely lifts a finger in regards to practical household skills, but he has managed to live a few years on his own at various points, to varying degrees of success.

9. Mobei-jun: Needs constant supervision. Can cook noodles poorly when necessary. I could not imagine him doing anything else domestic for the life of me.

8. Shang Qinghua: Can manage other people's messes, cannot manage his own life. Has been known to beg for food. Has been known to write 20k words a day without sleeping or eating. Also lived alone to varying degrees of success, but not healthily.

7. Wei Wuxian: Has grand delusions about being a house husband....not suited for the task. Can grow radishes at least. A child did not die under his (albeit supervised) care.

6. Chu Wanning: Somehow lived alone for several decades without dying or growing mold spores in his clothing. Can cook 1 (one) recipe. Does have an organizational system, albeit one no one else can understand. Gets sick often, probably due in part to lack of ventilation and poor laundry hygiene.

5. Wen Kexing: Can cook, can supervise others cleaning, mildly alcoholic but trying his best.

4. Lan Wangji: Can cook, can take care of children and pets with varying degrees of success, Lan arm strength probably makes him unsuited for doing laundry, but probably good at home repair.

3. Hua Cheng: not enough data, but probably a good househusband. Ive been told this ranking is accurate. Can at least chop up veggies and do basic home maintenance (rip xie lian)

2. Mo Ran: basically a master chef, is a pro at cleaning up after chu wanning, has been known to weep over bad hygiene, wants that domestic life like nobodies business.

1. Luo Binghe: Househusband supreme. Beyond just doing the cooking, the cleaning, etc, gives me the vibes of someone with tasteful interior design skills. Look at him go. Good for sqq.