#Severe alcoholic

[firestorm09890]

Penny stardewvalley makes me so sad because she's SO sensitive to, like, basically everything you tell her (telling her that you can't stand children while two children are nearby is a pretty lousy move but -1500 friendship?? being a jerk to other characters' faces typically loses you about 50 points, and if you choose the option labeled "creepy" and ask Leah for a kiss in her 2 heart event she physically hits you and kicks you out of her house but that's only -100 friendship…) and so if you want to befriend her it's a whole lot of lying and tiptoeing around her feelings (2 hearts: George was right but saying that makes her feel bad. 6 hearts: her food sucks but even if you try to be polite about it she feels like a failure; only a bald-faced lie pleases her. 8 hearts: saying you don't want to be tied down with a family loses you a little bit of friendship and she's only happy if you say you want kids) and I can't help but think she's a product of her environment. She lives in a trailer with only her mother, who gets drunk every night and has something of a temper. Penny's like a skittish rescue animal who won’t even come out from hiding under something unless you leave her lots of treats

[miss-americanbi]

the way i so personally need messy queer breakup crowley in season 3. let him mope around his sad apartment listening to sad music all disheveled in an ancient queen tshirt. let him dye his hair an awful color or get a piercing he’ll regret. let him get wasted with nina and maggie whilst he talks their ears off about each and every time he and aziraphale made eye contact. this is the queer representation i crave.

[ricky-mortis]

Curtwen Week Day 6: Happy Ending

[leadandblood]

Okay but is nobody gonna talk about "my father drank gin" and "put a bullet through my head before i drink gin" like is nobody going absolutely insane over that-

Well i am and im gonna talk about it.

The tragedy of children picking up drinking because they saw it in their parents and so it's much easier to fall into it. And their brain justifying being drunk on something else, as a defence mechanism, against feeling just as bad as their parent. They're drinking something else, so they can't be exactly like them right? But in reality it's often just as bad and sometimes even worse.

This is also genius because all you get is two innocent lines and that's all it takes for you to realise Crozier's past with alcoholism.

"my father drank gin" could just be a thing you say during a toast. "aah, my father loved gin, it's nice remembering things about him" but no. Here it's said so bitterly and hatefully, you know for a fact he drank a lot and Crozier HATED that about him. We can also assume he's dead from something alcohol induced.

And then the other line "put a bullet through my head before i drink gin" - despite what the words actually say - is also something you could say as a joke, when your friend offers you gin, you know. "you want me to drink WHAT??" Sort of thing. But here you kind of feel like... He means it. It's said with so much resentment and stubborness, he might as well mean it literally. "Kill me before i become my father." Because Crozier hated him so much he wants to become nothing like him. Even when it's through impressive mental gymnastics.

It's just agony to think about-

[popfizzles]

Smith doesn't have too many clothes, honestly. It's really a lot of the same tank-top, I think.

But, he's got a bit of variety depending on the situation and season :)

this made me realize i like smith in darker colors a whole lot x3

[rosemaryyuri]

it's so hilarious how a large chunk of the homestuck fandom actually and genuinely believes everything rose lalonde says about herself and her life. she would be so happy. You think I'm cool, calm, and put together? You think I'm a reliable therapist for my friends? Tell me more.

[dykedvonte]

It’s crazy how expendable all the crew members were to the Pony Express.

A 30% chance that your shipment would be lost. Cargo and crew are inseparable if we are to believe the shitty layout of the Tulpar. People use it because it’s cheap. The labor is cheap. The lives are cheap.

They are all relatively easy to forget about. It’s implied Anya and Curly don’t have many friends or much family to be concerned about them back home. She mentions nothing and no one to fall back on and he feels like wasted his life with the company. Jimmy probably only has Curly, otherwise people wouldn’t care or ask. Of course Daisuke and Swansea have family’s but Swansea thinks poorly of his and Daisuke’s poorly of him. All people in the companies eyes that wouldn’t stir up too much trouble if they became part of the 30%.

It makes it so much sadder because that ladder they were climbing was so small and shitty. There were rungs, ranks, but even the highest was barely off the ground. Jimmy wanted to reach the top of something that was brutally cut off and knocked everyone else off just to not see it.

[alliluyevas]

i say this as a non drinker but it is literally insane to me how many people are vehemently against dry weddings.

[gayness-and-mayhem]

Father Mulcahy being a spin the bottle champion is something that's so important to me actually.

[acowardinmordor]

We should give Steve sepsis more often. Saves Eddie. Hospital busy. Used to walking off injuries. Hasn’t stopped to peel off the bandages because it hurts and touching it will hurt more. Nothing malign. He’s not kept from a doctor. It’s just a crazy day or two, and he’s stuck in guardian mode. He’s a little hazy and his entire body hurts and he’s sweating and breathing too fast, but hey, panic attacks do that, and he’s earned a bit of a freak out after all of this.

So it’s not until relief nurses arrive from nearby, and one of them actually turns to look at the kid guarding the wanted murderer that they see it.

[neuroticboyfriend]

everyone makes fun of the whole "hi, I'm [name] and I'm an addict/alcoholic" thing but. do you have any idea how much strength is behind that phrase? to say who you are and what you're going through? to admit you have a problem? despite all the awful things you do to yourself? despite all the stigma towards addiction everywhere? despite how much you may want to just live in denial and pretend whatever pain you're going through is just fine, actually?

i didn't realize until the other day at group, when two group members introduced themselves that way. but when it came my turn, i just kind of froze up. i couldn't even say my name, i just said i was nervous. so they asked me my name, and i said my name. they asked if i wanted to say anything, and i said no, i'm tired, i'll just observe. and then i sat the rest of the meeting in silence, half of me wondering whether i was an addict or alcoholic at all. the other half ran circles in my head with all the things i wished i had the strength to say.

addiction of any kind - alcoholism or otherwise - isn't a joke. it's just not. it's not insignificant. it kills people. iit's almost killed me. and it takes a lot of courage and resilience to admit you struggle with it, let alone in front of a group of people. so. maybe stop making fun of addicts who are trying to empower themselves, find community, and get better. it's deeply ableist/sanist and just plain unkind. cruel, even.

[chiropteracupola]

finished watching niceys guys. can only assume that the feeling I'm experiencing is like unto that of having one's blood forcibly replaced with mike's hard lemonade. probably the watermelon one. jackson healy and holland march should have kissed on the mouth.

[skinnypaleangryperson]

This show is so good at small little details to reveal what's going on in the characters headspace eventually. The way that he was so obviously in that blank stare and space feeling god knows what fighting a silent battle of what is probably profound suffering if you love deeply, which obviously Rick does, and then instantly bumbled up and made a little quirky joke and then smiled and went back to having that mellow but distant tired look on face, which we've seen him do plenty of times before-it just goes to show that it's all just a performance, and that he probably has been feeling this way the majority of the time.

I know that we already know that Rick is miserable, obviously, for a multitude of reasons, but this just really said in stone the extremely and deeply deeply depressed in pain that he's carrying around with him all the time.

[royaltea000]

I bet he gets the worst pregnancy cravings known to man

[thefreakandthehair]

"You can trust us to stick with you through thick and thin — to the bitter end. And you can trust us to keep any secret of yours — closer than you keep it yourself." Eddie quotes at Steve, poking him in the chest. Steve watches as Eddie sways, just a tiny bit but it betrays the facade of sobriety he'd been trying to hold.

Eddie’d once had a better tolerance but he couldn’t drink throughout his recovery and everyone was finding that Eddie is a tactile, Lord of the Rings-quoting type of drunk as a result.

They’re alone in the corner of Steve’s living room, their arms wrapped one another, and it mustn’t be shocking because no one is looking their way. Only their closest friends are present and they’re left with plenty of room to touch without strange looks.

"But you cannot trust us to let you face trouble alone, and go off without a word. We are your friends, Frodo." Eddie finishes and flashes a warm smile at Steve and sure, Steve is a little less than sober himself but it’s the same smile Eddie’s been tossing him for fucking months and Steve is just tipsy enough to catch it.

“You tryin' to tell me something, Munson?” Steve asks, reaching one arm out to steady his friend. Yeah, sure, just a friend, his mind teases.

It’s been a solid six or so months since they’d been victorious against Vecna and shut down the Upside Down for good. And okay, he and Eddie have shared a bed more nights than they haven’t since then and it’s perhaps been a lot more than just friendly to Steve, but he’s learned not to make assumptions.

People don’t always feel about him the way he feels about them, and he can handle that. He can. At least, he can until Eddie starts drunkenly quoting the Lord of the Rings at him after a few shots at his New Years Eve party leading into ‘87. He’s got one hand wrapped around the back of neck, absently tugging on the hair at the nape, and Steve is trying to sober up enough so he doesn’t kiss his friend and read this all wrong.

“You were Frodo, Steve. And I was Sam. And I love you.” Eddie says, giggly but genuinely with both his hands digging into Steve’s waist now. The grin is real— it touches his glossy eyes and spreads across his face easily.

And I love you bounces around like a rogue ping pong ball in Steve’s chest. Steve sees that Eddie’s drunk— he can tell from the giggle, the tight grip on his skin, the glossy eyes. And Steve is heartbroken. He’s been head over heels for the man in front of him for at least the three months, consciously at least, and here he is, reminding Steve of everything he can’t have.

“Man, don’t say shit like that if you don’t mean it, alright?” Steve tries to make it joking, tries to laugh and smile in the way he thinks he should because Eddie's drunk but shit, if he hasn't daydreamed about Eddie saying those words to him. 

Eddie though? Well, Eddie might be drunk but goddamn it he knows Steve. And he means it. He loves Steve so much, it feels like it's trying to claw its way out of his body. He's just tipsy enough to finally tell him.

“Stevie, I do mean it. I mean okay—”  Eddie readjusts his Zeppelin shirt beneath his leather jacket and stands taller, fingers threading their way through Steve’s belt loops. “I may not be completely sober but I’m like, completely fuckin' in love with you? How dumb is that?” He laughs and ducks his head against Steve’s chest, wrapping his arms around back Steve's waist where this all began.

“Not dumb at all, Ed. Not dumb at all. Ball’s gonna drop soon, wanna watch it?” Steve feels Eddie's laugh against his chest where he holds Eddie tighter, suddenly afraid of beginning a new year. Eddie clings to him and Steve's brain begins a hysterical loop of questions like What if Eddie suddenly doesn't want to be this close when it's not 1986? When it's not the same year that we'd met and fought demons together? What if this fades, like everything else has?

"I dunno, do you love me? Be a hell of a way to ring in a new year, gettin' kissed by the one and only Steve Harrington!" Eddie's question throws a stick into the wheel of his looping brain, screeching it to a halt.

Steve knows this isn't the time and he knows Eddie probably won't even remember this in the morning but he does it anyways. He pulls back, takes a look around the room where all of their friends are cheering and counting down.

Robin had started the countdown at 60 seconds, just a touch too early, and they're only at 47 when Steve runs both of his shaking hands up and down the length of Eddie's arms. The last time they approach Eddie's shoulders, he keeps them there and inches closer, searching Eddie's wide, beguiled eyes for hesitation and finds none. Just finds what he always does: warmth, joy, comfort.

"39!"

"38!"

"37!"

"Ed, stop me if I've got it wrong."

"36!"

"35!"

"Definitely not wrong, Steve."

"33!"

"32!"

It's still 1986 when Steve Harrington finally kisses Eddie Munson. It's soft, gentle, close-lipped and tender without pushing for more. Eddie's fingers go numb and his toes curl in his boots, and Steve sees colors in a new way when they pull away and open their eyes.

"I do love you, Eddie." Steve says, breathless and happy in a way he hasn't been in years. He's still afraid, but even if he only gets this one moment, he's going all in for it. "So fucking much."

One palm comes up to rest on Steve's cheek, warm metal against his skin in the way of Eddie's rings. "It's not even the new year yet." He says with a laugh and a smile with his bottom lip between his teeth.

"19!"

"18!"

"Couldn't wait. I'll do it again in 1987, if you'll let me?"

"Any year, any dimension, Steve."

The countdown is getting closer and Dick Clark is yelling on the television when Steve grabs Eddie's hand and pulls him to join their friends, one arm slung over his shoulders and Eddie's around his waist. Steve gets a beaming smile and cocked eyebrow from Robin and his nod is all she needs.

"7!"

"6!"

"5!"

People start pairing off, and Steve's sober enough to realize that none of this would have made sense to him just a few months prior. Robin pulls Nancy closer with the hand not holding an obnoxiously loud noisemaker, Argyle smiles meaningfully at Jonathan, and Steve finds himself being spun back to face Eddie.

"Ready?"

"3!"

"2!"

"1!"

It's 1987 when Eddie Munson finally kisses Steve Harrington. They don't join the chorus of Happy New Year's! around them because it's Eddie's turn to kiss Steve, and he fucking does. A little harder, a little more tongue, a bite or two when Steve returns the same eagerness and impatience. It's Eddie who breaks the kiss, lips shiny and swollen.

"Gotta good feeling about '87, Stevie. Got a really good feeling."

[ghostfiish]

I did a panel redraw game on the Sleepless Domain discord server!! This was a really fun exercise and a good challenge to myself :)

Go read the comic if you like magical girl stuff (especially since this probably counts as some spoilers even without much context here lol)

I included closeups of the individual panels as well since the entire page isn't quite clear in the photo I took. There's some things I might wanna fix later for my own satisfaction but I'm happy with it!