#STOP MAKING HIM LOOK LIKE HE'S A TEENAGE TWINK PLEASE

[milolovesbmc]

Sometimes I will be drawing Whizzer and I'll be like "Oh this looks terrible" but then I remember it could be worse. I could be making him look like a twink.

[evilminji]

Okay this is going to drive me INSANE. D:>

Dearly beloved, Phandom darlings...

Can DANNY EAT VIDEO GAME/TV FOOD?

I... I NEED to know. You don't UNDERSTAND!? Think about it. No, seriously. THINK about all those HIGHLY unrealistic, too good to be true, PERFECT looking meals. Animated shows n games etc where there are chefs who will "cook for Anybody!"

Now think about being 14 going 20. A teenager. A broke college student. Your fridge is empty and everything you touch? Comes back to LIFE. You're... you're just so hungry. Tired. Your bruises have bruises and you have a paper due tomorrow.

I kinda want to CRY.

Can only eat cup ramen so many times before you DO.

And this show? That commercial? Yonder cooking game?? Well... they did a REAL good job animating it. It looks so WARM. So FILLING and COMFORTING. You can practically SMELL it.

You look down at your sad, soggy, cheap but you can afford it, EZ Noodles and? Feel something BREAK inside. You... you KNOW you can travel inside technology. KNOW this. Have done it before. Why... why AREN'T you? You can't keep living like this.

You gotta TRY, right?

I? Wanna believe it TOTALLY works?? Because Ectoplasm is weird like that? And just shrugs? Says "actual food, the concept of food backed by electricity, what's the difference? Sure, we can fuck with this"? And so Danny? IMMEDIATELY fucking switches his diet.

Like? Dead stop screech, slam on the breaks, u-turn to take that last off-ramp. Type IMMEDIATE.

Grocery bill? No, no, you mistake him! No. NOW it's his "carefully researched for their cooking, games and shows" bill. Touch his collection and he'll FUCKING BITE.

They got sticky notes on the cases. Menus n lil fold out "grocery store" locations. He punched a dragon for this fruit. Mmmmm, home cooked meeeeeals~

Just? Weird Foodie Danny. Yes he DOES know what those steaks taste like. While YOU fuckers were staring at the cat girls bizangas, HE was eating granny cat lady's home made meatball stew! Ha! YOU FOOLS!

More then that? I want him to write reviews. Like "yeah, fight system was OKAY but- *5 hour glowing rant about the food, sounding like a food critic who'd actually fucking gone and loved it* " and people are like?? Who? Is this funky lil madman? This is hilarious?

I want it to be DPxDC JUST? So everyone slowly starts to play the game "Meta or Shtick?" Because no one REALLY knows who he is. This dude gets POPULAR though. For some reason can't be hacked (shame on you guys! Way to try and ruin the FUN!). And like? Eventually? Someone just fucking ASKS?

And Danny is like... " wouldn't YOU like to know, weatherboy?"

So everyone is like:

"Meta."

But hey... since they're already ASSUMING~? >:3c WHOOOOO wants to help him PAY RENT~? Let's VLOG this fucker! Wooooo! Say "hi" Catchef! *feline noises* like? It's like a let's play combined with a mukbang.

Teen Heros everywhere are FACINATED. Game developers are suddenly like? "If there's food. You BETTER make it look amazing. We want that weird YouTube twink to... whatever his powers are, our game! Free viral marketing!" Food channels? Rending their clothes, on their KNEES, please! PLEASE! Just ANSWER OUR EMAIL! Just ONE SHOW! A one off! Guest appearance!

We have MONEY!!!

All while Danny? Is finally happy with his life. Weird as hell. Harrasing the world. Good food on the regular. Gets to travel, kinda. Best of all? He's raising money from it! Can help people! Now... who wants salad?

@babbling-babull @hdgnj @hypewinter @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @dcxdpdabbles @the-witchhunter @lolottes

[mirellapryce]

My submission for DBDA Positivity Week is the essay I wrote for Queer Media Meetup. It's a spoiler free-ish breakdown of the show, what makes it queer, and why I loved it so much. It is my love letter to the show, and the writers, actors and creators who brought it all together <3

What is the title?

Dead Boy Detectives. Tragically it was cancelled after one season on Netflix, but you should watch that one season anyway.

What is it about?

It’s written on the tin. They’re ghosts, they’re teenage boys, they solve mysteries. They’re the Dead Boy Detective Agency.

Okay, it’s more than that, but we do start with our main boys Charles and Edwin who are ghosts that work together to help other ghosts resolve their “unfinished business” on Earth so that they can pass on to the afterlife. This is tricky sometimes, because they’re also avoiding being taken to their own afterlives by Death. As Charles describes them, Edwin is the brains, and Charles is the brawns of the operation and they’ve been working together for 30 years.Which brings us to our main plot. They receive a job to help out a ghost’s living friend, Crystal, who has been behaving strangely for a while. Crystal is psychic which is why she can see ghosts. It turns out that she’s been possessed by a demon, but when they remove the demon, her memories are also mysteriously gone. Charles says that she can stay with them until they come back. Edwin is less than pleased to have a new person thrown into his perfectly normal, codependent household (but he can’t say no to Charles). For plot reasons, Crystal convinces them to take on a case all the way in the US where the majority of the plot takes place as they solve various mysteries before they can go back home.

What makes it queer?

Charles sitting on any surface that is not a chair is peak bisexual behaviour.

Kidding (and while I would have loved that arc for him, he was busy this season working through his trauma and learning to be more honest about his feelings, so we will move on to the actual queer characters).

Edwin gets his own gay awakening and subsequent coming out. He’s a repressed Edwardian boy who was bullied for his queer behaviours in his day. That doesn’t stop him from behaving very queerly even after EVERYTHING HE’S BEEN THROUGH (my boy is king of the trauma Olympics), and we love that for him. Another potentially queer aspect that wasn’t really explored, but was brought up in the show is that all of his human disguises are female. If the show had gotten another season it might have been interesting to see how that particular gender expression applies to his personal feelings on his own gender. Alas, I can only fall back on tumblr meta and fanfiction for that. Despite being stiff and awkward, the next two queer men are both down bad for him.

Monty is a lot of spoilers all on his own, but he immediately develops a crush on Edwin, and one of our living girls, Niko encourages Edwin to pursue the relationship.

The Cat King…Uhhhhhh he’s hundreds of years old. He’s a shapeshifter. He is in fact a cat, who just sometimes looks human, so expect typical cat behaviour. He doesn’t have time for humans gendering their clothing. He will rock all of these skirts, thank you very much. And he will dress down to try and seduce the hot British twink.

Now onto our lesbians. We forgive Jenny for being a landlord, because she’s also a hot, goth butcher (and now I wonder if that pun was intended when they wrote her job), and she hates that she genuinely likes our two female leads (our Alive Girl Detectives, Crystal and Niko, as it were) and as the only adult she has taken it upon herself to take care of these kids whether she likes it or not.

Maxine is also a lot of spoilers, but we will say she’s the cute librarian, and through shenanigans and matchmaking she goes on a date with Jenny and they are super cute.

Why do you like it?

I am weak for the classic, red-blue, sunshine and grumpy ship dynamics with banter, and our leads absolutely provide that. Admittedly I was drawn into this show from the fandom first for Edwin and Charles’ relationship. All of our characters have interesting and varied relationships with each other, whether they are best friends, frienemies, autistic besties, or romantic rivals. And once again, you all know how much I love a found family, and I only wish we had more episodes to see more of that family unit be built.

It should also be noted that the whole cast is just very nice to look at. I should not be admiring Jayden Revri’s jawline as much as I am.

Niko doesn’t get her own queer or romantic arc, but I love her all the same. I want to give her a queer honourable mention, because she’s the one who first explains to Edwin that two guys can like each other romantically. She has manga about it if he needs evidence. She is me in high school, and I love that for her. She loves love and just wants her new gay bestie to be happy, and maybe to kiss Monty.

Important notes that I picked up from a review of this show before I even watched it that I actually really appreciate. 1) It is well lit. You can see what’s happening! I did not have to fight with the lighting settings to see faces or settings or to know what was going on! 2) It is an “R rated family show”. To elaborate, the show does not shy away from cursing or violence, but there are no awkward sex scenes that suddenly make you wish you were not watching this with friends or family around. It doesn’t unexpectedly turn into porn so it’s good wholesome fun you can watch anywhere.

Another part I enjoyed was how certain plots gave us breadcrumbs, so we could pick up on the plot twist before it happened. It was subtle enough to not feel forced, but then when you see it you can look back and shout about how it was a sign.

I don’t know how they did it, but somehow it is the perfect combination of lighthearted, campy shenanigans and funs times, while also respectfully addressing a lot of darker themes. There’s a man who used to be a walrus. There are themes of grief for both the living and the dead. The Cat King is so extra that he brought a chandelier into the woods just to impress a guy. They bring up how abuse can mess you up and that if you try to ignore it, it can come back to haunt you. There are tiny gods who heckle you with white suburban Karen energy. The show calls out abusive and stalker behaviours for what they are. The afterlife is a bureaucracy with very specific paperwork that needs to be filled out before you can do anything. Our main characters are ghosts, because both of them were murdered in their teens.

All of that and more in just 8 episodes.

[dadddybangtan]

Metanoia | ch. one

cw: strong language, drVg use

word count: 1.6k

a.n. this story is a couple of years old and i wanted to share it. please enjoy and leave feedback <3

Table of Contents Next

I feel gross but not necessarily uncomfortable. I'm used to it now. Leaving that poor- or should I say rich- guy drugged out in his penthouse is wrong. But so is kicking your gay, sixteen year old son out on the streets with nothing but a school backpack and a handful of cash.

I leave his house with my jacket and pants pockets stuffed with my date's trinkets. I walk a bit down the road to find my boyfriend's car. He stole an uber sticker from an old victim of ours so his outdated car isn't suspicious next to the nice ones in this neighborhood. I get in the backseat and we drive off. I wait until we're on the freeway back to our place to climb to the front seat.

"Get anything good?" Taehyung asks, his baritone voice luring me to the front seat with him.

"I guess. A few watches. Some expensive looking necklaces that were probably left over from his female hookups." I say before pulling out an emerald studded necklace from my jacket pocket. "I'm convinced we scammed all the rich fags in Gangnam."

"If all the rich fags are hit, what do we do then?" He asked.

"Not sure. Probably find real jobs." I shrugged. But real jobs don't pay the bills.

I look out the window and see the city lights twinkle. I take in the brights like a photograph before we get to our side of town. It's dark and gloomy where we live. The streets are littered, the buildings are old. It's ugly, but it's home. It's like Gotham and we're driving past Metropolis.

Our goal is to be right there in Seoul working normal jobs and earning normal money living normal lives as abnormal homosexuals. Living as "roommates" until gay marriage is legalized. If it is in our life time.

Perhaps it's not right to swipe from our own kind, faggots. Every time my stupid brain tries to make me feel bad about it, I remember something Taehyung told me when we were both high as the heavens: There's a difference between poor gays and rich gays. Steal time from your poor gays and steal shit from the rich gay's closet.

"I say we make a new target." I propose, looking away from the window once I recognize our freeway exit. There's nothing to look at anymore

"Oh, yeah?" His deep voice asks. I can't tell if he's genuinely interested or not.

"Women..." I say, carefully, waiting for a response. He just cocks an eyebrow at the idea. Judging. "I know it's shitty. But you're hot and bi. I think you could do it."

That's a bold faced lie. I don't think he could do it, he's just the only one out of us that's up for consideration.

"Me," He scoffs, "Jimin, I don't know if you noticed but I'm the getaway driver. I don't do anything. Why can't you do it?"

"I'm a five foot eight twink, babe. I'm not exactly ladies choice."

He focuses on the road. I notice his hands grip the steering wheel a little tighter. His veins pop making me flinch. The mere thought stresses him out.

"You're serious?"

"What other choice do we have?"

His veins pop again. They travel up his arms through his neck. I catch him pinching his lips together and clenching his jaw. He's thinking too hard, stressing himself out.

We don't need this right now. The more stressed he is, the more money we spend. And with our drought, I fear we don't have enough wiggle room for his stress reliever of choice.

"I don't know how I feel about it." He says lowly, so low I could barely hear him.

I exhale through my nose and refocus my gaze out the window. I regret it immediately. It's like Gotham and I mean it. Except there's no Batman to help the poor women from getting violently mugged by that man. No one to stop the very obvious drug exchanges between an old dealer and a scrawny teenager.

"What we do isn't easy," In fact it's probably the toughest job out of our lowlife neighbors, "I know it's hard. I've been doing it for over a year. I did everything I could. Milked them dry, Taehyung."

"We could try another district." He says frantically while licking his lips. Meaning he knows how stupid that was to say. There are no other districts.

"Do you wanna go back to selling coke," I ask as I turn back to him, "Hm? Getting harassed by crackheads who don't have the money. Working all day and all night and only getting thirty percent of the profit?"

He blinks at the road, jaw quivering with realization.

"Or do you wanna spike a drink and get a fucking bag? Work for yourself and keep your money?"

That was a tactical approach to his sensitivity, which I normally don't resort to. Taehyung is sensitive and I usually try dealing with his emotions rationally. However, when it comes to our work, our money, our stability, I get hostile. I'm protective over our security because we have so little of it. I cut corners to keep it. And he might be mad at me for being so harsh and bringing up his old job, but he'll thank me later.

"This better work."

I don't blame him for masking an agreement with a threat. I just accept it and watch him drive. Count how many times he taps his finger on the wheel before we make it home.

Thirty-seven.

Our apartment is small with no room for furniture. I don't mind it though, I've tricked myself into calling it minimalistic instead of cheap shit. I plop down the the couch, that a million people must've plopped on. We picked it up from the side of the road since it was still in decent shape. It's trash but it's ours now and there's comfort in it.

Taehyung comes in not too far behind me and falls next to me. He throws his head back and exposes his neck. He looks just as exhausted as me, maybe even more. His head turns to me, eyes low, lips spreading into a sly smile.

"Wanna get high?" His groggy voice hums.

"Not tonight, Tae."

"Oh, come on, you never wanna do it anymore," He whines, smile still present, trying to disguise his peer pressure with cuteness. It used to work well, I used to fold, "Just a little bit."

"Babe, I really don't want to." I mean it. I hate drugs. Hard drugs make me fucking sick.

He turns his head back and stares at the ceiling. I stare too and wonder how those stains got there. There's one that looks like a kitten, it's the closest thing to a domesticated pet I can get in the shit neighborhood. Again, it's trash, but it's mine.

"Wanna stick it?"

I'm supposed to be mad, stay upset, but my lips curl up against my will. Not because I love poking him, but because it's cute, the way he says it. Stick it.

I push myself off the couch and go to the kitchen pantry. It's small too, like everything else, and embarrassingly empty. We have to be the only people who keep their drugs in the cabinet where bread and chips are supposed to be. It's pathetic but it's ours.

So I grab the bag of small white tablets, the syringe, the spoon with the burnt bottom and translucent blue lighter. I push out a tired sigh. I meet Taehyung back on the couch and light a white candle. That's the only nice thing in this place. A thirty dollar candle that I just had to get because it smells like the fancy hotel my parents took me too when I was eight. Eucalyptus sage. It's just a scented memory, but it's mine.

"I love you," He says, making me jump at the sudden speech, "You know that?"

He likes when I melt it over a single candle-lit flame. Makes him feel like I'm cooking for him. At least that's what he told me last time I did it.

"Yeah," I gush, watching it boil down, "I love you too."

He just smiles and let's the top row of his teeth peak behind his heart shaped smile, hiding his eyes behind his eyelids. When he opens his eyes fully, it's when the needle is ready. I kneel on the floor in front of him, grab his hand and push his sleeve up. There's a deep brown mark right there on the crook of his elbow.

I can't lallygag and stare at the horrid thing all night. I'll just remind myself of how much I don't want to do it. He clenches his fist, making his veins pop, and I put the needle right in the middle of the mark. I can't lallygag, but I can't miss. One millimeter off could kill him. I look him in the eyes so I don't have to watch it disappear into his pale arm. They close peacefully as he inhales and exhales.

"Better?"

"Yeah, baby."

Taehyung doesn't say much beyond that. Not even 'thank you,' but I know he appreciates it. I clean up while he unwinds. Before I sneak off into our tiny, lifeless bedroom, I take him in one last time. His cheeks are more sunken than last week and his dark circles are more apparent. He's still beautiful. Beautifully broken. An addict, but he's mine.

I lean over the coffee table to give him one last kiss. He smiles his chapped lips into a dazed grin, eyes still shut and body too limp to return the favor. Heroin is one hell of a drug. I'm surprised I can resist.

[diangelodork]

HERE ARE MY FRIEND (louis)’S COMMENTS ON E2!!!

Dead Boy Detectives Episode 2:

Wait why did Edwin like that pig diagram so much

Didn’t realize we were in Washington

OMG CAT KING IS HE GON BE CHUBBY PLEASE MAKE HIM CHUBBY

never mind twink

(Gaelic twink???)

Cat sex dungeon is terrible wth

Best friends my ass Edwin

Nope don’t like where this is going but HOLY JESUS HE GOT THAT MMHMM

Don’t do it Eddie

Piss and balls and shit damnit

Sex pest sex pest sex pest cat king is such a sex pest name

Yeah you better be

I wanna be that mail man

The lesbian sparkles that kill you instantly (lavender scare type shit)

WALRUS MENTIONED

Stop interrupting the walrus damnit I wanna hear this

To be a old man human walrus who owns a traveling boat magic shop thing giving weary travelers little magical trinkets

so much anime holy shit

Nose bleeding, sweating, nervous, colors im the air, me at the function af

TECHNICOLOR MANIC PIXIE DEMON GIRL!?!?!

She crushing? She just shy? Gay??? Demon possession or some shit???

JUST GIVE HIM THE BOOKS

Niko… parasite 😖 ew ew ew

Are you talking to her while she’s in the shower???

Ok she not actually showering ok

Love the aesthetic but y’all are not teenagers

Awwwww

EWWWWW GOD GET THAT GIRL SOME HELP HOLY SHIT

are you insane with the smile lmao

this poor girl wtf

😬

the afterlife looks like the TVA from Loki

Hypothermia, internal bleeding, pending, froze to death after being injured?

What. Does. Hell. Look. Like????

Why are children so important

Two Nancy lads mucking bout the woods (British)

OMG WHAT THE FUCKING TINY- WHAT

aye job jobbed

Damn absolutely mid pick up line would work on me

OMG NEW ADDITION TO THE CREW???

“Oh no I’m not gonna do it I just thought about it” real

MORE GHOSTS EEEEEEEEEE

YOU TURNED HIM INTO A TWINK

THE TWINKIFICATION RATES IN THIS SHOW ARE OFF THE CHARTS

+bonus

(for context, i sent him a nine minute long voice memo commenting on all of his comments and telling him what the fandom feels without spoiling 🙏🙏)

GUYS I ANNOYED ONE OF MY FRIENDS WNOUGH TO WATCH DBDA!! im gonna be posting his live updates in the reblogs HEHEHEHEHE (the score is what got him to cave 👹)

[englishknightsky]

Thomas: Honey the news just said teenagers under the influence of drugs aren't happy, vibrant or involved! Do you think Craig-

Laura: Thomas, Craig has never been happy, vibrant or involved.

Thomas: Oh, right.

Eric: Look, these are the shelves I was talking about.

Kyle: Are those the same shelves from that Nazi's house? You want Nazi shelves?

Eric: No, if anything those shelves were Nazi-occupied.

Stan: I finished the memorial for Pip.

Kyle: One problem, you misspelled both his first and last name.

Stan:... Eh, he's dead, he's not gonna notice.

Clyde: Tweek's new boyfriend is a secret, that means he's ugly.

Craig: Asshole! I'm Tweek's new boyfriend!

Token: Guess you were right, Clyde.

Richard: I quit using meth for good, now I'm only using it for evil!

Craig: Where are my pants?

Tweek: You threw them out of the window in a fit of passion. You said you were never gonna need them again.

Kenny: My medical alert bracelet warns first responders that I kiss back during CPR.

Damien: Aw, were you beaten as a kid?

Pip: Yeah...

Damien: Well you're still annoying, so clearly they didn't hit you enough.

Cartman: I get my snack ideas from 600lb Life, those people have some bomb ideas for dinner.

Kenny McCormick added Wendy Testaburger, Bebe Stevens, and 23 others to a group chat.

Kenny: Damn girl you look fine

Kenny: Wow they ain't send separately

Kenny: Bye

Kenny McCormick left

Timmy: Did you just call yourself a Nintendo console?

Jimmy: No, that's a Nintendo Switch, I called myself a crippled bi-biii-bitc- bitch!

Tweek: Do you wanna get married?

Craig: Well, we're already engaged so yeah.

Tweek: In Stardew Valley, you goof.

Craig: Oh! Yeah.

Tweek: Dad, will you read to me?

Richard: Who the hell are you?

Mars: Dads, I'm supposed to fight some kid at school tomorrow.

Tweek: Oh god.

Craig: Try to not to fall in love with them.

Clyde: See Token, I told you they could deep fry my shirt!

Token: I didn't say they couldn't, I said you shouldn't.

Craig: I need some space.

Tweek:

Tweek: Are you breaking up with me?

Craig: No, I'm falling off the bed, move over!

Stan: Check out this animal, it's called a kinkajou.

Cartman: A kinky jew? Where?!

Craig: Um, so. Stripe got outside, but luckily we caught him. Points camera at Stripe in his cage But if that's Stripe... who the fuck is this? Points camera at Tweek holding an identical guinea pig.

Kenny: Once I was jogging and found a corspe, and I was glad, because that meant I could stop jogging.

Pip: My nickname is Pip.

Damien: What's Pip short for?

Eric: 'Cause he's a twink.

Butters: Hi can I have a happy meal with extra happy, please? :)

Kyle: No, you hang up first!

Cartman : No you hang up first!

Kyle: Okay.

Cartman:... He hung up on me!

Jimmy: Is that why you opened a cafe? To get people to like you?

Tweek: You want to talk about getting people to like you, funny man?

Stan: Agent Raven approaching the site, operation 'sleepy time' commencing, over.

Wendy: Stan, stop playing with the baby monitor. Over.

Token: Craig, got any cleaning tips?

Craig: Never fall in love, have any friends or pets or family, then they won't make a mess.

Craig: Good morning babe.

Tweek: Die.

Craig: I got you a triple espresso, but I'm gonna hold it just out of reach so you have to get up if you want it.

Tweek: Die twice.

Butters: Well, it doesn't have a tail so I'm pretty sure it's a hamster.

Tech Support: Okay fine, right click the hamster.

Jason: So is this thing between Tweek and Craig a secret?

Token: Hardly. The only people who don't know that Tweek and Craig are in love with each other are Tweek and Craig.

Mr. Mackey: I heard children screaming, and as a counsellor I know that screaming can be a cry for help.

Tweek: Do you think Clyde will like the new cookies?

Craig: He'll eat anything you put in front of him. He's like a dog.

Tweek: Hm, that's true. I saw him eat a receipt once.

[mischiefandspirits]

Bernard Figures It Out

Was reading through all the comments on @frostbittenbucky's post and all I could think of was that it was Bernard talking to Tim. Then I got to thinking...

"I've connected the two dots."

"You didn't connect shit."

"I've connected them."

Bernard figures out Tim's a superhero... sort of.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tim fidgetted nervously as he waited on the front porch of his boyfriend’s house. Bernard had sounded so serious when he’d called during Tim’s lunch to ask him to come over after work so they could talk about something.

Which Tim had done, after spending an entire board meeting just going over the past week trying to figure out what he’d done.

The only thing he could think of was that he’d ducked out halfway through their lunch date on Wednesday to give Duke some backup, but Bernard had seemed understanding when Tim explained there was an emergency at GRC Labs. It couldn’t have been a tipping point, either, since Tim had managed to only flake on three other dates over the past few months they’d been dating. Kate had been happy to cover for him as often as she could “out of queer solidarity” when she found out Tim was dating a boy for the first time and Tim had managed to trick Bruce into covering a few actual Wayne Enterprises emergencies for him when they came up.

There had to be a reason Bernard was breaking up with him, though. Had he missed something? He definitely wasn’t forgetting an important day. He was good with days and Tam was even better, so she would have reminded him on the off chance that he had forgotten.

What was he missing?

Bernard was smiling when he opened the door, but there was a nervous energy to it that had Tim’s stomach sinking. “Hey, Tim.”

“Hey.” Tim gave his own nervous smile then slipped inside.

They went into the living room and sat down on the couch.

Tim frowned when Bernard grabbed a manila folder off the coffee table. Crud, had he screwed up enough that Bernard had had to make a list? He knew he was new to dating a guy, but he hadn’t thought he’d done that bad. He’d really been trying, especially with how his and Stephanie’s relationship had fallen apart at the end. “What -”

“Just let me speak, Tim,” Bernard said, waiting for Tim’s nod. “Okay, so you know Clark Kent, right?”

Tim blinked as Bernard opened the folder to show a picture of Clark. It looked like one of the employee pictures from the Planet’s website, with his dorky “I’m just a humble country boy” smile and the golden globe from their roof photoshopped in as the background. “Uh, yeah? I think so. He works for the Daily Planet, right? I think he’s worked at a few of Bruce’s events. Not a lot of outside reporters are willing to come to Gotham.”

“Exactly!” Bernard said, snapping his fingers and pointing at Tim.

“What?”

He pulled out the picture to show the next page was an article titled, “DAILY PLANET REPORTER… BATMAN!?”

A wave of relief washed over Tim and he placed his face in his hands. “Were you up all night on the hero conspiracy boards again?”

“No. I mean, I found this on a board and was up all night thinking about it, but I found it reasonably early.”

“One in the morning isn’t reasonable, Bernard.”

“Says the guy who’s always wide awake when I call to infodump.”

“Touché.” Tim leaned against Bernard and gave him a smile. “So tell me, why is some reporter from Metropolis from all places Batman.”

“First of all, living in Metropolis is the perfect cover. Everyone assumes Batman would live in Gotham, no one would consider he could be from anywhere else. Metropolis is outside the GMA, but close enough that the commute is still possible.”

“But it’s Metropolis.”

“And who would think Gotham’s Dark Knight lives in the sunshine capital? Plus, I hear he disappears a lot on the job. There’s gotta be a reason for it!”

Tim made a note to let Clark know he needs to cut back on the disappearing act some since people are catching on.

“And have you seen the guy? He is swol AF, babe.”

“Please don’t call me babe while you’re talking about how hot another guy is.” Especially Tim’s honorary uncle.

“You know I prefer twinks.”

“BERNARD!”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, ignoring Tim’s shout. “The guy is definitely hiding something! Besides, Kent is an investigative reporter. He’s gotta know a lot about cases and the underground and detective work.”

Not as much as he likes people to think, but more than he likes people to know Superman does, Tim mused. “But what about the other vigilantes?”

“Well, Kent has a cousin…” Bernard flipped through a folder and pulled out a picture of Kara. It looked like a screenshot of her interviewing Lena for CatCo. “She’s obviously the latest Batgirl. Look at her hair. And the first Batgirl and the current Batwoman were obviously Lois Lane, the red hair is just a wig. Did you see how she kicked butt at that last event she went to? She’s not as subtle as Kent. That means their son is the latest Robin. He’s exactly the right size.”

Oh, Damian better not hear about this, Tim cackled internally. His youngest brother hated being reminded that Jon was the same height as him despite their two years age difference. Damian definitely took after Talia when it came to body type, no matter what he said.

“And Kent also has a brother.” This time he pulled out a picture of Kon. The clone must have been caught by a reporter out shopping with Ma since he was carrying some paper bags and glaring at whoever was behind the camera. “At least, he’s supposedly Kent’s brother, but he was a teenager when he first showed up with the Kents. A lot of people think he’s actually Kent’s son, that Kent got a girl pregnant when they were teenagers and something happened to the mom so Kent had to take him in. Now the Kents are trying to hide it by saying the two are brothers.”

That was… scarily accurate actually. Especially given Luthor and Clark were close friends at the time that Kon would have theoretically been born.

“And that beef would explain why the younger Kent brother went all crime lord on Gotham for a while before reconnecting with the family.”

“Wait, what?”

“Yeah, Kent Jr.’s got the perfect build for Red Hood.”

Tim bit back a comment on how Kon was shorter than Jason by a good foot. Timothy Drake-Wayne should not know that. Add Jason to the list of people who can’t hear this theory.

“And then there’s this girl,” Bernard picked up a picture of Lois, Jon, and Natasha Irons walking down the street together. “No one’s sure exactly who she is, but she’s been spotted with the Kents a few times. I think the cover story is that she’s Jon’s babysitter.”

“And the actual story?”

“She’s Black Bat, obviously. That’s why she wears a mask that fully covers her face. She doesn’t want to stand out as the only African American Bat.”

“Isn’t Signal also Black?”

“Yeah, but he works in the daytime so he’s already a standout.”

“And who is Signal in this? And what about Nightwing and Red Robin?”

“Well, Nightwing’s just a Blüd who came to Gotham. He doesn’t count.”

Ouch. Sorry, Dick.

“And Red Robin is obviously an older Robin, the one who was Robin when we were kids. Kent wanted to keep him on, and I don’t blame him. As for Signal, he’s got the same backstory as all the other Robins Kent picked up, he just went the Signal route because he didn’t fit the usual Robin mold.”

“Because the female Robin fit the mold,” Tim snorted. Robin Mold, as if he and his brothers were even the same ethnicity. Or even had the same hair color. Jason dyes his hair, Dick’s is brown-black, Tim’s is pure black, and Damian’s is more a dark brown and it’s only getting lighter as he gets older.

“She didn’t, that’s the point. Kent tried to give breaking the Robin mold a chance by letting his cousin have a go at it, but he realized it just didn’t work so she went back to being Spoiler and he got a new Robin.”

Not touching that with a ten-foot pole. “Right, and where does he get the usual Robins? Please tell me you’re not back on the secret government orphanages theory.”

“No, no, no. Kent travels sometimes for his job, right? And a lot of the time he’s going to places that have been hit by disasters or major crimes. So he’ll take in some of the displaced children to train as his robins.”

Tim pressed his face back into his hands.

“You see it, right?”

Honestly, Tim was just wondering how his boyfriend could be so close, and yet so far off. “How would Kent even afford taking care of a bunch of secret -- possibly illegally acquired -- children without anyone noticing?”

“Simple. Bruce Wayne is funding him.”

“Bernard, I love you, but what the heck?” Tim blushed and looked up as he realized what he’d said, but Bernard didn’t seem to notice as he steamrolled ahead.

“It’d also explain how he can afford all the gear and how he’d be able to travel to Gotham or anywhere else Batman goes without anyone noticing. He probably has a secret Batplane or something.”

“Why would Bruce do that?”

“Because Wayne cares about Gotham, everyone knows that, and this way he can make sure someone’s taking care of the city without anyone putting two and two together.”

“And two plus two is?”

Bernard gave him a hard look. “I’m not stupid, Tim. Bruce Wayne is obviously Superman. His face is right there.”

Oh, the others are going to love this! Too bad I can’t tell Damian or Jason. Jason especially would have loved this. “Right. Bruce is Superman.”

“He is. Superman is known for being nice and Bruce Wayne’s basically all that’s keeping the city running at this point. That’s nice as hell.”

Oh my god.

“And Wayne does charity for the victims of cataclysms, doesn't he? I bet he first saves people from them as Superman and then builds them new homes for free.”

Oh my god! Why am I not recording this!?

“And the Wayne’s were rich enough to hide the fact they adopted an alien baby.”

Tim raised an eyebrow. “If you’re about to tell me this is why Bruce’s parents got killed, you might want to stop while you’re ahead.”

“It’d make sense. There’re all sorts of unanswered questions about their deaths,” Bernard muttered under his breath, flipping through the folder. He pulled out another picture of Kara. This time she was in full Supergirl attire with a bus held overhead. “So if Wayne is Superman, then that’d mean your ex-girlfriend could be Supergirl. They look a lot alike and it’d explain how she got involved with you all.”

“Bernard, she has a human dad. You know, Cluemaster. The supervillain.”

“Yeah, her dad. But we don’t know anything about her mom!”

“Let me guess…”

Bernard pulled out a picture of Karen. She and Helena were suited up and talking to a group of cops, two goons held over each of Karen’s shoulders. “Her mom could be Power Girl! Some makeup and a wig and she could look just like Crystal Brown! And Damian Wayne is obviously the new Superboy! That’s why his background is such a mystery, right? He had to stay a secret until he could control his alien superpowers. That’s why he’s always so mean. It’s a cover since everyone knows Superboy is super sweet!”

Sure, when he’s not helping Damian pull pranks or using his adorable powers to put the blame on Kon and I. “No, Bernard. Damian and Steph are just very human hellspawn. And Bruce and Crystal are human too. I can’t believe you called me over here just to tell me you think Superman is both Batman’s sugar daddy and my adoptive dad.”

“Well, that’s not exactly why I called you over,” Bernard admitted, the nervous energy coming back. He grabbed Tim’s hands. “Tim -”

Tim’s stomach sank. “You are breaking up with me!”

“What? No! I don’t want to break up!”

“Why are you acting all nervous and serious then!?” Tim asked, pulling his hands away to throw them up in the air.

Bernard shook the folder. “Because I’m trying to tell you I figured out you’re Superboy!”

Tim’s brain blue-screened and his hands slowly dropped. “I’m sorry, what?”

“I know you’re Superboy. The older one, obviously. By the way, you and Damian really need to figure out separate names.”

Forget Jason and Damian, Kon can never find out about this. He’d never let me live it down. “Bernard, you called me a twink five minutes ago. Su-” Shoot, I can not risk getting Kon’s attention! “The older one might not be as big as Superman, but he’s not a twink.”

“Well, yeah, that’s the shapeshifting at work.”

“The what?”

“Obviously you Kryptonians can shapeshift. Why else would you look so much like humans?”

… Why do Kryptonians look so much like humans? Was there some - Wait, no! Break into the Fortress of Solitude for research later! Reassure your boyfriend that you’re not an alien now! “Bernard -”

“And that explains why your step-mom was so hot.”

“Gross.”

“She and your dad were actors hired by Luthor so you could have a normal life! But now Bruce has custody so he adopted you.”

“No.”

“That’s why you and your dad were so weird with each other when I met him.”

“We were weird because he’d just gotten out of a coma not long before to find that his wife was dead so he decided to actually be a dad for once in his life, but overcompensated and became a helicopter parent to a kid who was mostly on his own for his entire life!” Tim blurted out. “I am not an alien, Bernard!”

“Well, not technically since you were cloned from Superman on Earth.”

“Oh my god! You were just talking about Steph being Supergirl! Why would I date my dad’s cousin?”

Bernard blinked. “Supergirl and Superman are cousins?”

Right, Timothy Drake-Wayne wasn’t supposed to know that. “I thought they’d said something like that before, yeah. Are people seriously saying I’m Superboy on the internet?”

“NO! No, I swear I would have led with that if I thought your identity was compromised. A few people have mentioned Wayne and Damian, but not you or Steph or Jason.”

“Wh-Jason!? You think Jason was an alien too!”

“No, not exactly, but a few times when I’ve visited I swear I’ve seen a guy in the manor who looks like Jason. It’s just been out of the corner of my eye and he’s gone whenever I look so I’ve always thought it was just Dick or Bruce or some picture of Jason that my mind was playing tricks with, but it makes sense now that I know Wayne is Superman. He must have been able to heal Jason with alien tech, but couldn’t say anything because that would give away that he’s Superman.”

Damn it Jason! And damn it Bernard! I’m dating the smartest moron in the world! “Bruce did not bring Jason back with alien technology and none of us are aliens!”

“It’s okay, Tim. I won’t tell anyone.”

Tim grabbed Bernard by the jacket and pulled him into a kiss. When he started to feel lightheaded, he pulled back, “Could someone whose skin is as solid as stone kiss like that?”

Bernard blinked dazedly at him for a moment. “How do you know what Superboy’s skin feels like?”

Tim screamed internally. “He’s saved me from a kidnapping before.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I can get you the police report if you want.”

“Huh… And the others?”

“Not Supers. I can stab Damian the next time we’re at the manor if that’ll prove none of us are aliens.” He’d rather stab Jason, but that would probably only confirm to Bernard that Bruce used alien technology to bring him back.

“You probably shouldn’t stab your brother if he isn’t an alien.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “I won’t stab him anywhere deadly.”

“That’s not the point,” Bernard said slowly.

“He’ll be fine.”

“If you say so.”

“So do you believe I’m not an alien now?” Tim huffed, letting go of Bernard’s jacket.

The blond’s eyes dipped down to Tim’s lips. “If I say no, will you kiss me like that again?”

“You’re ridiculous,” Tim said, but he kissed him anyway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Okay, but I still say Clark Kent is definitely Batman.”

“Sure, Bernard.”

[cooloddball]

This is going to be a super long analysis of jib3 starting with the opening ceremony to the closing ceremony so brace yourselves. 

Please note I believe in the breakup theory so maybe my opinion in this one might be biased so please don’t come for me, lol.

I will put it under the cut to avoid overcrowding your dashes with cockles shenanigans. 

Also, watch out for profanities and mature language.

And so it begins...

Opening ceremony

The camera used to record the opening ceremony is shaky. 

Misha, Jason Manns, and Jarpad seem to be having a lot of fun together and Jensen is just looking at his besties talking to the man he loves and he knows he can’t have that so he just stands there looking at them. Poor guy.

Jarpad asks who took Misha’s riffle? Things are awkward, I honestly don’t know what’s going on.

Misha kisses a plushie while making eye contact with Jensen and Jensen is like “oh, oh, wow” while making eye contact with Misha. LOL. Jack help me. This is a lot!!!

Jensen takes a plushie from Sebastian and Jared takes the one Misha had.

Are you guys flirting about trying to see whether you can keep plushies alive?

Misha throws something at the fans, I think he was throwing treats from earlier or whatever it was and Jensen says “Misha is still throwing” I mean why?

Cockles Panel

Jensen is so extra in this panel.

First of all, when he and Misha come out (no pun intended) a song starts playing and he starts dancing. Jensen is usually so poised while dancing but he is over the top throwing his back and shaking his tush for the mish.  I think he was trying a little too hard. Misha spares his ex-boyfriend’s tush a glance smiles and looks away. LOL. The whole thing was cringey, tbh. It was so unlike Jensen.

When Sebastian touches Jensen’s shoulder and says something to Jensen, he [Jensen]  laughs way too hard. I would say he laughs abnormally-it’s loud and he throws his whole body into it like he’s trying to prove what Sebastian was funny and it probably wasn’t. He laughs so hard he ends up right on Misha’s side. and Misha laughs at that though.

Rich says something about something in the sac that hurts(It’s incoherent) and Jensen says it hurts right here pointing at his heart (I can’t hear what they are saying exactly so if anyone knows please let me know)

I don’t know if Mark P. was going to hug Jensen or not or he was pointing at something behind Jensen, but at that moment, Jensen sees Sebastian going to hug Misha and whips his head away from Mark P’s direction so fast he almost broke his neck.

Sebastian humps Misha (these two are so playful I love them) and Jensen is just there acting awkward 

There’s a comment by Rich about “It’s over, the convention’s over I’m no longer your bitch” I don’t know who this is about.

Now, now, now. This whole time Rich is doing a kissy mouth with his fingers on the monitor behind Jensen and Misha. His hand is right where Misha is standing (you’ll understand once you watch it) so Jensen makes a kissy face back and Misha is blushing? Ummm wtf is going on here?

Jensen also does something strange that he never does during cockles panels he pulls his seat away from Misha.

Misha makes a very weird comment about Sebastian’s libido drying up and they have a weird conversation about libido and Viagra ads. It’s weird.

It gets even more awkward Jensen talks about bringing a total stranger, and a blind date. And it goes downhill from there with them. The it wasn’t you it was me speech. It was special. So heartbreaking. It was clearly not about the show but about their relationship. I always have a difficult time getting through that part. It’s so awkward that the fans are just there wondering what the hell is going on.

They decide to take questions and the fan is all over the place so Misha interjects but Jensen won’t let Misha say what he wants to say so he says, “This is why you make it awkward. You never let people finish what they are saying.” Ouch. Domestic dispute vibes anyone?

The way Jensen is looking up at Misha when he’s answering that question. It’s like he wants to sear his face into his memory before they leave Rome.

Jensen is explaining to a fan how one of the four sound stages they had on set was full of furniture and Misha adds “and soiled mattresses”  I mean what was the reason? Did they soil the mattresses with their [redacted]

A fan mentions something about Dean and Cas so these two adorable dorks smile and share a look. Things are starting to look up. Thank Jack.

The fan says something again (I can’t make out what he’s saying) but it must be something nice because they look at each other with smiles on their faces again.

Jensen playing with the head of his microphone. Is it just me or did the temperature rise a notch higher?

The way they look at each other when the fan says to help him choose the hottest female cast member on the show 

Then something freaky happens they say the exact same thing as twins or bffs do sometimes. LOL.

When they start talking about the hot women with the fans Misha moves his entire body and now instead of looking at the fans, he is seated facing Jensen.  The tension is simmering down.

A point to note is that in all their panels they always sit angled facing each other as opposed to facing the crowd save for this panel and DCCON 2019. But for DCCON I can understand that they weren’t comfortable being meant to be a J/2 panel and a creation event. So you know some people in that crowd are super mean to Mish and others to Jensen, so they had to tread carefully. But I digress back to the chaos.

They ask who wants to have a cockles panel the next year and they both raise their hands. I thought that was sweet

 It’s adorable how Jensen keeps repeating everything Misha is saying.

Misha forgets himself and moves too close to Jensen to listen to the song on the phone. Jensen turns to look at Misha, I don’t know what that look is but Misha backs away laughing.

Jensen’s face journey while listening to that song is gold.

Misha moves closer to listen to the song.  I have to say the way they are standing is not usually how two bros listening to music usually stand. If you know what I mean

 Misha agrees that’s definitely Jensen singing. Of course, he knows because Mr. “Jensen sings to me all the time”

He looks so proud of him.  I’d venture to say he’s happy to hear Jensen sing because he has always been so shy about that fact about himself. He even gives him a standing ovation. That’s so adorable. He loves him. My heart.

Jensen is so cute trying to deny it’s not him singing that song.  Yeah, it’s you, Jensen. Even your ex agrees it’s you and we bet he knows how your voice sounds in all kinds of situations ;)

we get a tingly feeling so we know it’s you. Jensen’s adorable smile when Misha says that. Aww.

The way they are not even looking at each other but they are seated the exact same way.

Allow me to explain to my friend here. Explains how his parents didn’t know whether he was a boy or a girl. Misha with the steel chair, “when did they figure out that you were a boy?”

How many years did they call you holly?

For six to seven years

Is it just me or is this conversation a flashback of teenage twink-lesbian Jensen years?

Fan asks whether Dean will ever forgive Cas. Watch Misha’s body language, he is trying to pacify himself by rubbing the back of his neck and fumbling with his shirt.

When Jensen says “ No!” without a moment’s hesitation, Misha looks distraught? I don’t know maybe I’m reading too much into this but I feel like this hit too close to home being that they were most likely broken up.

Misha however has a different opinion, “I think he has” 

Jensen says, “Wishful thinking” and that elicits a smile from Misha.

A fan asks about Dean giving Cas the trenchcoat back and things get interesting.  Weirdly, that Jensen can’t say the word gay out loud. He literally uses the word “unmanly” in its stead in the guise of censorship? It’s not a bad word Jensen you can say it. However, Misha and the fans say the word so I’m wondering who is censoring Jensen’s use of that word. He eventually says it but super fast.

Jensen says that saying “I always knew you would come back” is not something he would say to another human being, especially a man. Jesus, there’s nothing wrong with saying that to another human being you care about. He’s the one making it gay. He was extra when answering that one.

They spent one and half hours making that scene just to end up not saying anything and it ended up looking gay anyway. Anyway, that’s interesting.

 Jensen angles his body towards Mish and says in a very low soft and sexy voice “I guess I really hoped that you would come back some day” I would venture to say that Jensen at the moment in the panel was actually saying them to Misha. Who knows though?

They talk about it a whole lot for something that bothered him that much. 

Misha being so excited about recreating a scene when a fan told Jarpad he’s amazing and Jarpad said "you are welcome. 

 “I think I understand what she wants. I’m not sure what she’s gonna get.” This is a very good line Misha. I will be using it often.

The way they awkwardly stand too close and whisper to each other. Umm…what is going on here?

Jensen folds over laughing because of something Misha says. They are back. The tension is almost 90% gone now and they are in their element.

The chaos of recording the alarm ringtone for the fan was just great to watch. They kept getting closer and closer and I think they might have shared spit at that point. Gross….LOL

The way Misha is sitting is he you know.

Jensen asking Misha whether he was saying anything or just screaming while they were recording. I think he just wanted to see Misha smile.

Jensen’s joy when a fan mentions that they have Misha’s résumé.

Jensen saying the word shit made my day. I curse a  lot and it made me feel validated somehow.

Misha calls him dickhead in return and Jensen stops functioning and laughs instead . He also gets all hot and bothered trying to fumble with the lapel of his shirt.  He does this a lot when he is turned on. He has a humiliation kink I think.

They start talking over each other about Misha’s special skills. Looks like Jensen might have known beforehand because he went straight for that. Or maybe he didn’t know but he knew since Misha is a mad genius there must be some amazing things in there. Either way, it was a good moment.

OMG Jensen is so excited and the way he motions to Misha to bring that résumé to him, LOL. This man was thirsty AF.

He even goes down from the stage to meet Misha and invades his personal space trying to reach the résumé. I think this is the moment the tension between them dissipated completely and they were back to some form of normalcy.

Misha holding Jensen’s shoulder trying to get his résumé back. Unsucessfully, I should add.

They read something funny and they fold over laughing and spin around like overjoyed seals. It is far removed from the mollusk family but at least it’s still a sea creature (I don’t know what I’m saying please don’t mind me)

Jensen is still on his knees laughing and can’t get up. As I said, he is being too extra in this panel.

 Misha is trying to talk but they both can’t stop laughing. I think Jensen laughed so hard he got an extra set of abs that day.

Jensen is still laughing and you know what he is laughing at? Misha’s special skills being acting on camera. I mean it’s funny but man, prayforjensen.

 They are still laughing. Jack, help them.

The way Jensen looks at Misha with pure adoration here makes me so happy and reminds me of the fictional characters they played being all heart eyes for each other.

 Misha laughed so hard he cried.

Jensen trying to read the next ‘special skill’ Misha has but he can’t even talk because of how funny he thinks it is. He’s trying so hard not to laugh but he can’t help himself.

Jensen agreeing and also asking the audience to agree that Misha has a knack for certain accents. Accent kink anyone?

 Jensen is so excited when Misha starts Tibetan throating singing and does the unicorn laugh facing away from the crowd. Bet he has experienced Misha’s Tibetan throat singing skills on a personal when they are (loud overhead helicopter noises followed by thunder rumbling)

Jensen falling to the ground after feigning a heart attack once he saw that Misha is a certified EMT. I mentioned before that I honestly, 100% think he wanted mouth to mouth. There’s no other explanation. He could’ve feigned a nose bleed or just about any other illness but he chose to fall on a dirty floor and lay down so Misha could either give him the breath of life or straddle him. Luckily for him his dream came true 7 years later at Jib9 when straddle gate happened. But I digress

Too bad Misha was still mad at him and heartbroken so he kicked him instead.

Jensen knowing that Misha kayaks seems to be part of his personal knowledge. Maybe they did it together sometimes.

Horseback riding. Hmm is it just me or do they seem awkward here?

 Misha is so close to Jensen’s armpits. Must be missing his man’s musk and being held in those muscular arms again. Poor baby.

Misha can’t talk because of how funny he finds bicycle touring. I mean…I don’t see what’s funny but I guess he knows why it’s funny.

Misha laughing and raises his legs because Jensen is elaborating on the bicycle touring. Maybe it’s an inside joke or maybe it’s no longer funny to me because I’ve watched this panel like 5 times.

 I think Jensen’s goal was to see Misha laugh and be happy because he turned to look at Misha who was still laughing hard and the joy on Jensen’s face. Aww.

Misha gravitating towards his man again. He must smell really nice Misha. And those arms. Bet he used to lift you against the wall and (this fucking thunder won’t stop rambling. Are chuck and Amara fighting again?)

Jensen marketing his man’s carpentry skills but then makes sure to make it ‘no homo’ by saying he would never sit on anything Misha has built. Sure Jan. Then he circles back and says that he knows that he can build things.

Misha walks away from him and he looks up to make sure where he is going. Maybe he was afraid Misha was walking out on him. (PTSD from their breakup?)

They mention acting on camera again.

And laugh 

Jensen keeps talking about the acting on camera and watches to see if Misha is still laughing  He still is and Jensen is happy that his baby is happy. He looks at him again and he is still happy that Misha is still happy. Then once the laughter dies down he starts talking about bicycle touring  and checks again to see if Misha is laughing which he is so Jensen throws his head back  unicorn laughing and then looks at Misha again to see that he’s still laughing. Then they look at each other and say something maybe it’s about that was a good laugh. Jensen is wiping tears from his eyes because of how hard he laughed  Misha does the same. That entire thing was insane and they seemed to love it.

 Jensen starts saying that being this happy or goofing around is how they are on set sometimes and have to take a 5-10 minute break and Misha doesn’t seem too happy at the mention of the set. 

Jensen knowing that you can buy résumés on eBay. Did he buy Misha’s and then plant someone in the audience to bring it up or? Okay, yeah I know I’m reaching here but it’s probable.

 I guess my theory wasn’t farfetched because Jensen says that he’s pretty sure that Jarpad put it on eBay the previous night so maybe he is the one who did all that to win Misha back?

Jensen knows the appellation clogging is a stretch. Seems like Misha has told him about it before.

Jensen looking at his watch to see if they have time for  Misha to be telling a story about his high school sweetheart and now wife. I bet he wishes Misha could tell their love story so openly. He can’t stop looking at Misha.

The way Jensen is looking at Misha here. WTF man? He’s literally confused about what the question is.

The personal space question. This whole thing was just so many things. It was awkward, cringey, thirsty, funny.

when the fan asks whether there’s a funny fact between Jensen and Misha. I almost fainted. What? And Jensen repeats it. The two men are so stoic. They are not even looking at each other. They are looking at the fan like the way a statue stares at you, unmoving. Cringe.

The room is so quiet. Poor girl, I hope she didn’t feel awkward afterwards because if it were me, I would’ve cried from how stoic they looked and how quiet everyone was.

How they both scratch themselves, Misha on the head and Jensen on the nose. Maybe the question hit too close to home

Jensen turns to look at Misha as if to say ’help me out here man. We don’t wanna disappoint our fans.”

Misha gets it because he gets up. This whole thing is gold.

The way Jensen breathes out in anticipation. I know it was like they were playing a skit about personal space but why was he breathing like that? Shouldn’t he have been playing it as ‘uncomfortable’ not ‘turned on.’ Boudoir mannerisms.

Moving on Misha is unsure on where to touch Jensen 40.31. This is weird in and of itself because usually, they don’t have a problem touching each other’s faces, tush, eggplants, (jib4 anyone), backs et cetera. But now it’s weird? *cough* breakup *cough*

Misha touches Jensen’s ear and Jensen literally moans. He frigging moans people. In case it is not clear in the video, here is an isolated audio version of it. Jensen is also fumbling with his shirt like he’s all hot and bothered. Just like Misha did earlier. Was Jib3 their couple’s therapy that reminded them how happy and horny they made each other?

Jensen is really not answering the question, to be honest. He’s fumbling for words and trying so very hard to make sense but his word are  incoherent.

Misha going in for the nose dip. I know friends do this all the time but you have to be very close and familiar with someone such as a friend friend or a sibling for you to poke a finger in their nose. I mean noses are slimy and eww…anyway. That happened. They seem so comfortable with it. Jensen I love you but please stop talking.

The way Jensen looks at Misha. He has the cutest smile on his face as if saying thank you for making that fun and making me horny, I still want you.

Misha wiping his pinky that touched Jensen’s nose on his pants. (I wanted to add something disgusting about what heshould’ve done with that pinky but I won’t so let’s move on)

Jensen wiggling his nose.

When Misha suggests that Spn moves to Nickolodeon. Jensen laughs a bit too hard.

Misha talking about spn being a puppet show reminds me of how he mentioned them having a puppet show in Jensen’s backyard after the show is over.

Jensen also saying that in a way spn is a puppet show. I mean is someone making snide comments about how their strings get pulled and sometimes they are not happy about it. Like how they fired his boyfriend. It seems like it’s an inside joke.

They named the plushie Zippy aww :))

For jack’s sake guys, the way they look at each other when they mention that the  résumé was the highlight of the panel.

Jensen saying the more dirt you dig up on Misha, the more rewarded you are. Aww, someone’s trying to win his man back by any means necessary. You go girl…I mean Jensen.

He talks more about how he’s looking forward to next year when fans have more dirt on his friend Misha. Jensen didn’t want to leave the stage, he was lingering so he could spend more time with Misha.

It’s over guys.

Closing Ceremony

I know you didn’t ask for the closing ceremony but here you go. It’s a free gift.

Can I just mention how Jarpad is an overactive puppy? He has to play with anything and everything he finds.

The mc announces Misha twice for some reason. The second time Jensen looks in Misha’s direction with a small smile on his face. He [Jensen] is also chewing vigorously.

Jensen and Jarpad being typical dude bros and karate chop Rich. This is why the difference between his relationship with Jarpad and Misha stands out. He would be too busy making heart eyes to Misha to kick another guy. LoL.

Jensen hulking out when Jarpad is taking a video of everyone. Lol. This video keeps reiterating my point that his relationship with the two men is just different.

Jensen keeps looking in Misha’s direction, Misha who is busy talking to Steve and having fun. Let me also mention Steve is Jensen’s bestie and so are Jarpad and Misha, but I’m sure that Jensen felt some type of way, jealous when they were having so much fun with his man and he couldn’t. Jarpad also takes a while filming Misha for Jensen of course. They remind me of me having a crush back when I was in school. Wait, did Misha look at Jensen? It’s hard to see because the angle of the video is not expansive but I guess he was.

As soon as Jarpad gets back, Jensen takes the camera from him and starts filming fans. I’m sure he just wanted Misha to look at him

Rich mention’s Misha and something about acting on camera and Jensen licks his lips looking at Misha (I think).

Jensen then vigorously grabs the microphone from someone immediately and mention’s Misha. Jarpad’s reaction at that moment tells you everything you need to know about what’s going on between Jensen and Misha. It looks like he is pleading with Jensen in his head saying, “Don’t embarrass yourself bro. Please don’t” but it’s too late.

Jensen again talks about Misha’s résumé and specifically about acting on camera, the thing that made Misha laugh out loud during their panel. Someone’s smitten. Defending his ex-man.

Jarpad goes to whisper something to Misha. And they laugh while Jensen is thanking the jib staff for doing an amazing job. But when he sees the duo laughing, he loses track of thought and says “and they are all getting married”  dude what ??? How do you go from thanking people who worked on the convention and in .1 seconds you are talking about they are all getting married? Who is? Are you okay? Do you need to sit down? No one gets it, he says he’s kidding and gives Jarpad the microphone, spares a glance at Misha and he seems distraught from that moment on. I wish I could see Misha’s face through all this.

He’s glancing in Misha’s direction again. Man’s got it bad. What?! Oh to be loved by Jensen Ackles. Misha must be a prize, I know he is a mad genius and gorgeous and sexy as hell with that golden skin that looks like it was dipped in gold and honey, big blue eyes that are bluer than the bluest blue, but Jensen wtf man? You are in public.

 I think Jarpad is telling Jensen something maybe it has to do with what he and Misha were talking about earlier?

And it’s over people.

Overall, I agree with the breakup theory. I mean the way these two were acting around each other was very strange. If you watch Misha and Jarpad, they seem okay from the opening ceremony up till the end but Jensen and Misha are just being weird.

The panel was mostly fun but their body language told a story that something was definitely going on between them. 

@littlewolf2703

[fruityyamenrunner]

The Mike Pilavachi affair is interesting because reading the reports superficially it seems like a standard "priest is a nonce" story but it's more interesting because there is a very significant "counter-initiatory" element:

It's possible, probable even, that he is guilty of real noncery and rape - certainly all the "if you have safeguarding concerns, please contact the church at this number" is an effort to bring any noncery into the light -- but mostly what he is guilty of is oil massaging and wrestling twinks of legal age, as well as the usual "overgrown child" occult politics of a middle aged man playing with cliques of excited religious youth, forming inner rings etc.

In an interview in The Sunday Times this week, David Gate, a former Soul Survivor worship leader (responsible for music) described his experience of working with Canon Pilavachi, whom he had first encountered as a 12-year-old attending the New Wine festival.

He was 16, he said, when Canon Pilavachi “singled me out and told me I was going to do amazing things for God”. He contributed two songs to a Soul Survivor album, and started to lead the singing at events. As other men have described, he wrestled with Canon Pilavachi, “but always fully clothed in the company of others”.

“There seemed to always be a favourite — usually athletic, always male teenagers or young men — no older than 23,” Mr Gate said. “If he’d win — and often he was a lot bigger than us — he might sit on top of you. Looking back, it must have appeared strange, a 45-year-old, well-built man wrestling on the floor with a 16-year-old boy.”

In 2012, Mr Gate moved to the United States. During a visit to Soul Survivor, Watford, in 2017, he recalled: “Mike preached that men couldn’t have relationships with other men because they have too much lust. He reasoned that women had lower sex drives, which moderated a man’s libido. It was misogynistic and homophobic.

“In the evening, we were instructed to break up into small groups of five or six to talk about sex: adults with teenagers. Most of us were strangers. There was absolutely no safeguarding. That was the final straw — I never went back.”

“There seemed to be no one who Mike was accountable to,” he said.

it's not ilegal, it's not even very immoral. Against the grubby background of charismatic evangelicalism, he is only slightly darker. He stands out because he grew so big and, for some fucking reason, decided to run his cult under the Church of England umbrella, conservative charismatic evangelical flavour.

The second part makes good initiatory sense -- this very simple kind of childish guru stuff works best in a context of repression and liminal ecstasy. Whatever you believe about the reality of "initiation" you might call even the charismatic evangelicals "counter-initiatory", but next to their fellow churchmen, largely happy to preside over an English Shinto or keeping up the lace-within-lace games of Anglo-Catholicism, they resemble the classic "initiatory" perverts.

All I can think is that as an initiatory guru, his perversions are so mild -- he seems to have scrupulously followed sex laws, looked for boys and men who were at least latently homosexual (and in that environment, there's not any unrepressed homosexuality, which colours the accounts of his detractors and victims) so mild that I don't think any other authority but the Church of England would even have cared enough to stop him.

That and the money of course - his concerts seem to have been expensive affairs.

magic man on this podcast calling Stephen Batchelor and Sam Harris "counter-initiatory" and "black brothers"

[yikesharringrove]

Notes while watching episode 2:

Tldr, this season is still pretty fun. Of course they’re introducing more of the mysteries, so the tone (and my screen) has gone darker. I’m really sick of the plot centering around Nancy and Jonathan just not being able to talk to each other. We’ve had it since the beginning I’m DONE. Stop introducing side characters when you don’t have any idea what to do with your main ones. I’m hoping we get more of Lucas this season, he barely had like two minutes of screen time (which is a trend from last season) and also no one cared about billy. But of course, we knew that.

Anyway here is the long version of my notes:

The way I GASPED when Powell and Callahan stepped out of the police cruisers and Powell is the chief now I screamed bitch. My favorite minor characters are HERE.

I have Jonathan’s haircut right now rip

Everytime I am forced to watch children kiss each other I feel my soul slip away. (Although the flower thing was lowkey cute)

Mike not hugging Will is pure homophobia I’m gonna throw up.

“I heard a lot about your sister” unfortunately, we all have.

Glad to see that Murray is still dialed to 1000 forever.

They are really trying to make Jonathan look like an extra in Almost Famous and it’s just. Not working.

They really are out here shoving Steve into youth xs size polos and bitch I’m HERE for it.

“Alone we totally suck” Steve and robin platonic soulmates 4ever

Bennys burgers is now the teenage rage place obsessed with that.

“The devil lives here in Hawkins” yeah and the devil’s name is Nancy’s wardrobe

Claudia Henderson my beloved.

The way Dustin is defending Eddie and saying he knows that he’s too good a person to hurt Chrissy, and Max saying how scared Eddie looked and putting together the Upside Down pieces just breaks my fucking heart. No one cared about billy no one cared about billy.

People need to start fucking believing Joyce. She’s been right about everything for four seasons now stop staying no to her.

I am very similar to Joyce in that I am in love with Jim Hopper.

I am DEEPLY claustrophobic that torture scene was A Lot.

Wills deep man voice is freaking me out he’s a grown human now I’m gonna barf he was such a squishy baby in season 1.

Obsessed that Will is lowkey good at roller skating. He’s such a fruit.

Someone called Mike a twig and I thought he said TWINK.

Jason the WASP can eat my shorts PLEASE don’t tell me he becomes part of the main group I hate his dumb face. I only have room in my heart for one stupid prep and that spot is FILLED by STEVEN HARRINGTON

Nancy and Jonathan actually talk to each other and communicate challenge. “Slow motion breakup with Nancy?” VIBES

I don’t understand why Angela keeps calling El a snitch? When the teacher asked if something was going on El said there wasn’t, but the teacher saw through it. Like, she tried to cover for you, sorry that your bullying isn’t subtle.

When I heard that psycho killer baseline I genuinely had to pause the show to calm myself down that song is SO FUCKING GOOD

Jason the prep is just Hawkins’s version of Archie Andrews I’m gonna cry with this vigilante shit.

“See ya later. Alligator.” Steve Harrington my BELOVED. When he said that he looked so dead inside <3

I think Lucas has said about eight words this season and I’m Tired. He was barely in season 3 and only existed as a punch line for the joke of being constantly broken up with by Max. They’ve added a hundred new characters and have totally cast him aside which is ALSO on trend. Doesn’t mean I fucking like it though.

Reefer Rick is just Steve.

Okay when Steve was talking about attending to all the customers equally……. Not just babes…….. bisexuality……..

(Also some random punk walked in behind him and punk kid is my new kilt guy)

For some lovely lovely angst I am now headcanoning a scene where vecna gets in Steve’s head and uses Barb’s death and funeral against him like the reporter kid. I think that seeing Steve go through that guilt would be delicious.

Mike calling out Will for being a douche when really he’s just gay and Over It. “Why am I the bad guy” Mike you’ve been a dick for four seasons. Maybe look internally.

El just claw this bitch’s eyes out already. YES SKATE TO THE FACE GO GIRL.

Dustin is so annoying fr he’s the best. “Is that foot?” “No that’s just a shoe.” Steve and Dustin #DreamTeam

Movies and tv stop being too dark for me to see what’s happening challenge.

The little trumpet noises Robin makes SHES SO CUTE.

“Yeah yeah, on Dustin’s mother” this is some fucking Claudia slander and I will not stand for it.

All steve knows is eat hot chip, moan when other boys press up against him, and lie.

Eddie (rightfully) being treated like he’s been traumatized. No one cared about billy no one cared about billy.

They filled Eddie in on all the upside down shit right away. No one cared about billy no one cared about billy.

Vecna doesn’t feel like an Upside Down thing to me. I mean, he’s clearly in the Upside Down, and is a part of it? But the way he’s like up in these people’s heads is weird. I don’t think he’s any part of the mind Flayer because we had that bitch for two seasons, they’d be finished with that.

Also not the demogorgons being able to fly. These bitches have seriously evolved like the fucking graboids in Tremors 1-3.

[diluchatesme]

Genshin Retail AU (Liyue)

Notes: damn i dont think the posts are showing up in the tags am i doing something wrong :[

Warnings:

Xingyun (if you squint)

ChiLi (very prominent)

Mentions of crime and Baizhu slander (but i love him, dw)

Other than that I dont think there should be anything too distressing :) please enjoy!

Liyue (Macdonalds):

- Ningguang is the store manager who doesnt care what her employees do as long as they do their job and there are profits

- Keqing tries to keep the order but its about as easy as keeping peace in a daycare but the daycare is full of teenagers capable of arson

- please help her its a macdonalds why is she taking this so seriously

- Chongyun and Xingqiu are always on shift together whether its in the kitchen or cashier. Noone questions how, only that Xingqiu has something to do with it, and chongyun knows nothing. But they do their job, so nobody really calls them out on it

- Zhongli used to work at the drivethru but then got demoted cause hed try to tell everyone the history of macdonalds and held up the line

- so now hes only allowed to fry the fries and not have any interaction with any customers

- similarly ganyu is banned from the kitchen cause she fell asleep in the freezer once and noone noticed until the next morning so shes either at the counter or drivethru

- Xiangling is great at her job and can be stationed anywhere in the kitchen but oh my god please its illegal to put those ingredients in the salad no xiangling stop

- the food ends up good so noone complains but...when the monthly inspection comes..shes put off work for about a week until it passes over

- Hu tao is....hu tao. She once got an order wrong on purpose as a prank but then was brought to the break room for a 'talk' by Zhongli for 5 hours and she never did it again

- tho she does occasionally prank people by saying the ice cream machine is down followed by "dadada!! Youve been pranked!!"

- only she finds this funny and there have been several complaints to Keqing, much to her dismay (definition of "disappointed, but not surprised")

- why did ningguang even hire beidou she isnt even here half the time or she shows up half drunk

- even on the days she shows up sober...everyone can see that hip flask, ma'am,, but understandable, customers are a nightmare

- Xiao dresses as ronald macdonald and hates his job but zhongli was the  one who recommended this job so he refuses to quit

- he would be fine with it if the children werent so loud and a certain kfc employee didnt come in everyday to laugh and take pictures of him

-Xinyan is one of those really loud and enthusiastic cashiers and after she talks to you you feel really heated inside (like an adrenaline rush after a concert)

- whether its good or bad depends on the customer..

- but shes lowkey banned from the kitchen due to her trying to make everything higher temperatures ("itll cook faster") and almost burning the entire macdonalds down

- man we dont know much about yanfei yet but for now she sits at the ball pit or those children play areas and make sure nothing is blown up (looking at you klee) and rules are followed

- Qiqi has a questionable memory, has to be put in charge of similar tasks or its too much for her, so she counts stocks and reports back, under the scrutiny of baizhu, who orders said ingredients

- as for who moves the boxes, well thats where beidou comes in cause sickly green twink man cant lift for HIS LIFE

- overall its a nice place with some oddities here and there but the business prospers and surprisingly stuff gets done

Extras:

Banned from kitchen:

Ganyu

Xinyan

Beidou (Drunk)

Banned from interaction:

Zhongli

Bonus:

- Childe works at a shneznayan Starbucks (with the other harbingers) and used to show up through the drivethru in a fancy ass sports car and still in his work uniform to see zhongli and flirt through the speaker, even if hes muffled and zhongli doesnt understand what hes saying (he was also one of the reasons the line was constantly held up)

- but now that zhongli is in the back he just shows up through the front door every break that he has and makes himself at home in their breakroom (after 2 hours or so scaramouche comes to drag him back because hes STILL on shift)

[thorniest-rose]

dude i cant stop thinking about johnny calling daniel a nerd and a geek for liking comic books but secretly having a big ass stash of spider-man comics cause it's his favorite superhero since it reminds him of a certain someone 👀. i mean lets take look at the similarities shall we 😌👓🤏 : brunette twink *check*, never shuts up *check*, having less money than his peers *check*, underdog *check*, incredibly selfless *check* and the list goes on and on. i just picture teenage johnny reading the comics compulsively while unknowingly pining for daniel 😫🥺

Oh my GOD *shakes you* this is so fortuitous because just the other day I was thinking about how perfect and amazing Ralph would have been as Peter Parker!!! Like imagine a Spider-Man film was made in the 80s, similar to how Tim Burton made Batman in 89, and it was just after the huge success of TKK and Ralph was cast. He would have been perfect!!He had the New York accent, the lithe body shape, he could do the sweet motormouth thing, he was cute but not a hunk or overly masculine, like... he had the whole package. If only I could go back in time and convince a major studio to make it and to cast him, everything could have been different.

But ALSO please imagine a lawrusso SM au where Daniel still moves to the Valley and is trying to be a normal kid but he's also trying to hide that he's Spider-Man, so he's going to school by day and at night sneaking out and putting the suit on and taking down thugs and crime lords in LA. Omg and then what if Johnny was M.J? But a hot jock version?? And he falls for Daniel, so Daniel then has to juggle school, his feelings for Johnny, and being Spider-Man and knows he can't tell Johnny because it could put him in danger, but he also really wants to be honest with him. Ugh it would be so good!!!

p.s was this inspired by the new Spider-Man trailer or the bit in my fic ace of hearts where Johnny sees Daniel with SM comics?

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 04 (first part)

(Masterpost) (Episode 03) (Episode 04 second part)

Warning: Spoilers for all 50 episodes!

Also warning: these posts just keep getting longer how are they getting even longer good lord I had to split this one. 

School’s in for the Summer!

All of these nice young actors show off the results of their movement training as they beautifully perform prostrate bowing in near-unison. (yes, there is a Chinese word for this action, but it’s used in English in a shitty orientalist way, so OP is going to call this prostrate bowing)

Note that the very last person to hit his knees, by a wide margin, is Head Snob Jin Zixuan.

Lan Qiren looks them over with pleased dickishness.

I am really wondering what actor Huang Ziteng looks like without a struggle beard and mouth blood and chronic fainting.

That's...a lot of crosses, my dude

(more after the cut!)

Lan Clan Rules

The Lan rule set is basically a checklist for shit Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang can get up to this summer.

The rules include several that Lan Wangji is actively breaking this very moment, including “Don’t wear any jangling objects like beads,” “don’t be suspicious,” “don’t pierce your ears” and “don’t be supercilious.”  

Wei Wuxian’s Summer Project

Extrovert Wei Wuxian gets started on the important work of making new friends. Waving to Lan Wangji in class doesn't get him anywhere (apparently), but he meets Nie Huaisang and forms one of the most important relationships of his two lives.

He doesn’t even know what they are being mutually squirrely about yet but they are instantly on the same wavelength.

I like you, yeah I like you, and I’m feeling so bohemian like you

When Wei Wuxian discovers that this classmate has smuggled an entire live birb into this boring-ass lecture he is completely delighted, and they are brothers in troublemaking from this point onward.

This is where we learn something important about Nie Huaisang. He wanted a rare canary, so he stalked it for three days, caught it, and caged it.  

This careful hunter is 15 or 16...I wonder how much more patient and determined he will be when he's 35 or 36?

The Salute Ceremony: The Unstabby Bit

The Jin Clan starts off the salute ceremony by presenting Lan Qiren with a fancy book bound with gold string.

Wei Wuxian is genuinely impressed, but Jiang Cheng calls it "meretricious" [op looks it up] which means "apparently attractive but having in reality no value or integrity." Wow, Jiang Cheng is so deliciously bitchy.

Then it’s Nie Huasang’s turn. Wei Wuxian is impressed when he hears his name, meaning he befriended him without giving a fuck about who he is, which is sweet.  I adore this friendship and think there are so many reasons NHS chose WWX to carry out his vengeance, none of which come from him being the dread Yiling Laozu.

The Salute Ceremony: The Thirsty Bit

To represent the Nie clan, I present this nice pot to Lan Qiran, and this rare and beautiful twink to Lan Xichen

Note: the trash talking jerks in the background are from the Jiang clan. Yanli does not remind them about their manners.

Quiet, reserved Lan Xichen greets Meng Yao with compliments and a hand massage and by doing this thing with his mouth.

No words are being produced at this point, he is just...parting his lips gently while he rakes his eyes over Meng Yao’s face.

Meng Yao doesn’t mind a bit

Flames on the Side of my Face

The Wen Clan guys have left Club Ruohan and are coming to summer school. Wen Chao is evil. It's subtle but you can tell by the way he casually sets people on fire.

Lan Clan Rules for Gate Keepers

do not draw your sword to stop someone from setting you on actual fire

do not use magic to stop someone from setting you on actual file

do not call for help when someone sets you on actual fire

Wens Qing and Ning believe in helping people, so once the smell of burning flesh starts to annoy them, Wen Qing puts out a solid 80% of the flames.

Note: We’re going to be spending a lot of time hating Wen Chao, so now might be a good time to have a look at (actor) He Ping out of costume.

Clearly, Wen Chao is just a beautiful troubled person with pretty moles who totally deserves a second chance.

The Salute Ceremony: The Stabby Bit

The Wens interrupt Jiang Cheng’s salute. Lan Xichen apologizes to them for not knowing they were going to show up like a bunch of interrupting assholes.

Lan Wangji wants to murder Weng Chao and looks at Xichen for permission but Xichen says no.

I never get to murder anybody not even that Su She asshole

So Wei Wuxian starts running the WWX fight book, which has to actually be pretty gratifying for the Lans, who are stuck being good hosts.  

He skips the windup in this situation of heightened danger, so he is formal, polite, and doesn't cross any boundaries. But Wen Chao came looking to fight so it escalates immediately, with Jiang Cheng also getting in Wen Chao’s face.

The Wen Clan decides to teach the Jiang Clan a lesson.  This is really the seed of the Lotus Pier massacre...it was always going to happen. The Wens draw swords and almost the entire Jiang Clan immediately draws as well.  

Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng both use the same sexy move, kicking their swords up off their benches into their hands.

Nie Huaisang hides behind Meng Yao, who immediately uses his whole body to shield him and shows a bit of his titanium spine. I LOVE Meng Yao’s strength here. 

Wen Qing protects her brother by putting her arm across his chest, which is not going to be helpful in any way if someone wants to stab him.  

To end this urgent and dangerous standoff Lan Xichen slooooowly brandishes his flute and plays a little toodleoo for 15 full seconds, eventually causing all the swords to fly up to the ceiling and then down into the floor.

{I know, flautists, I know. Never let facts get in the way of a joke!]

Everyone politely allows him to do this without actually taking any swipes at each other.  Then the swords all magically vanish along with the holes they made in the floor, which is convenient.

Now we get to see Lan Xichen angry, and oh my god, the tiny glimpse of that secret fire. 

Now Wen Qing finally steps up to defuse the situation. She cannot believe she has to work with her boss's horrible stupid son who insists on fucking up every project, god why did he ever get made a vice president I can't believe I have to work with this tool.

Meanwhile, Lan Xichen is going to rue the day he introduced Wei Wuxian to Flute Magic.

Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang 4-EV-R

After the ceremony Nie Huaisang, calling Wei Wuxian “Wei-Xiong” (brother Wei, a bit more formal than -ge) praises his bravery. Wei Wuxian says that he enjoys resisting evil, harking forward to his chivalric calling & future promise with Lan Wangji.

Jiang Cheng says, without irony, I think, and with only a little bitterness, that normal people can't compare to Wei Wuxian’s bravery. Wei Wuxian downplays his courage and says that he wants to teach Nie Huaisang to have fun.

Now - hopefully we've all seen Fatal Journey, right? I won't spoil it here. But if you've seen it you know that a person who gives Nie Huaisang permission to be his true self is going to be precious to him.

Lan Wangji shows up and Wei Wuxian calls out to him, calling him "Ji-Xiong." Lan Wangji totally blows him off but Wei Wuxian is undeterred.

Xichen and Qiren Talking.

Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren talk about this whole Wen situation while Qiren pours some tea that appears to just be hot water. Dude.

Qiren is afraid this murdering of cultivators is going to be something the two of them can't handle. You think? There are already about 16 dead cultivators in the mosh pit at Club Ruohan; at what point are you planning to handle it?

This Ship is Sailing

Meng Yao comes to say goodbye to Lan Xichen and to trade hearts with him. Also to have a lot of feelings that his giant eyes and adorable dimples cannot contain.

Lan Xichen: Don't bow to me. No need to thank me like this. We’re equals. As equals we could take turns kneeling to each other, if you catch my drift.

Lan Xichen: Why not stay for several days? Oh if you're Nie Mingjue's boy I guess I have to let you go. He's great. Really. SO great.  

Lan Xichen: Look, you’re with Nie Mingjue and I’m with Nie Mingjue and it only takes one stroke to turn a Vee into a triangle, is what I’m saying.

Grown-ass man Lan Xichen is so much less prudent than his teenage brother. Each of them has fallen hard for someone but the much younger Wangji tries to control it. Hopeless romantic Xichen goes right over the cliff, as well as deliberately knocking away many of the fences around Wangji’s heart so Wei Wuxian can make a home there. We love him for it, of course.

Episode 04, Part 2 is right here.

[darkverrmin]

Do You Like It? Pt. 2

Link to Part 1:

warning: people saying mean stuff to Jaskier, mentions of homophobia, light smut.

They walked out of the tavern and turned to a narrow path, shaded by trees. Jaskier chattered about nothing in particular and Geralt found his voice soothing. Their shoulders occasionally brushed by accident and it sent shivers down Geralt’s spine. Geralt sneaked glances at Jaskier when he thought the bard wasn’t paying attention. The Witcher still couldn’t calm himself about how good Jaskier looked with that black eyeliner and the unbuttoned shirt, revealing his chest hair. It was an odd mix of masculinity and femininity that sent a wave of arousal through Geralt’s body. When Jaskier caught him looking and smiled at him, Geralt imagined himself pushing Jaskier against a tree and kissing him breathless. But in reality, Geralt averted his gaze to the ground, his face hard and impassive.

They walked like that for half an hour, Jaskier talking and Geralt deep in his thoughts. They were already close to the inn when they passed a group of five men, leaning against a fallen tree trunk and talking loudly. Geralt glanced at them briefly, looking for any signs of danger. He instinctively took a step closer to Jaskier, ready to drag him away if anything went wrong. The men stared at them, but didn’t make any moves.

Just as they passed the group, a drunken voice called them from behind.

“Hey, pretty! My friend here is wondering how much you take for a blowjob!”

They stopped. The men burst out in loud laughter. Geralt felt a wave of rage washing over him. Jaskier turned at the offender, regarding him with a dismissive look, before rolling his eyes and turning away. “Such clever words from such a clever man. Let’s go” he addressed Geralt, resuming their walk.

“Hey! I’m talking to you! The twink with the makeup! Why won’t you come over here and we show you how a real man looks like!”. The men laughed again and someone whistled. Geralt glanced at Jaskier who raised his eyes to the sky, his expression showing exasperation and half-amusement. “Thank you, dear” he threw over his shoulder “But I like my men a little less thick headed”.

Some of the men laughed again and Geralt noticed from the corner of his eye that the offender launched in their direction, his face furious. “What was that, you little fucking-”

Geralt turned on his heels to grab the man, but he was too late. Jaskier gave him a firm kick in the groin, sending him to the ground howling. The other men jumped to their feet and one of them tried to grab Jaskier by the throat, only to be punched in the face by Geralt. Geralt shielded Jaskier with his body and growled at the men. One of them took a step backwards, whispering to the others “shit, it’s that damned Witcher”. The others lowered their fists and weapons, slowly backing away.

The offender stumbled back to his feet and tried to slip away from them. Geralt grabbed him firmly by the collar of his shirt and pushed him back to the ground again. The man tried to get up, but Geralt stepped on his shoulder, causing him to yelp in pain.

“Geralt!” Jaskier was staring at the scene with wide eyes. “Geralt, it’s not worth it!”. But the Wicther wasn’t listening to him. He pressed his boot harder against the man’s shoulder, causing him to groan.

“Apologize” Geralt growled. The man turned his head to look at Jaskier, blinking rapidly. “I-I-I’m sorry. I’m sorry!”. Geralt turned his head to look at Jaskier. “Do you accept his apology?”

Jaskier looked at Geralt before looking back at the man on the ground and nodding. “Yeah, I do”. Geralt stepped away from the man, still glaring. “You’re pathetic” the Witcher snarled. “And about being a man... You can be sure that he’s ten times more of a man than all of you will ever be, combined”. Jaskier almost gaped at those words, remaining silent.

Geralt walked away, shouldering past Jaskier. “Let’s go”.

Jaskier stared at the man who stumbled to his feet for another second, before turning away and following Geralt into the dark.

***

Geralt walked at a fast pace, his fists clenched at his sides. Jaskier caught up with him quickly, walking beside him and looking at him worryingly.

“Geralt”.

No response.

“Geralt, please slow down”.

Geralt ignored him, continuing at the same pace. Jaskier jumped in front of him, grabbing him by the arms. Jaskier’s forehead bumped painfully against the Witcher’s nose.

“Ahh, fuck” Jaskier groaned, rubbing his face. “Sorry”. The Witcher dropped his hand from his nose, still glaring. “What, Jaskier”.

Jaskier sighed, tilting his head to look into Geralt’s eyes. Geralt felt something stirring in his chest. Jaskier sighed, dropping his gaze to the ground. “I just wanted to say thank you, for what you did back there… And also, I’m sorry”.

Geralt blinked at him. “What the fuck are you sorry for?”

Jaskier still wasn’t looking at him. “Should’ve kept my mouth shut. Ignored him”.

“He was calling you a whore”.

“Well, it was kind of expected”.

Geralt blinked again, exasperated. “What?”

“I knew I might get shit from people if I walk around looking like this”

“That doesn’t make it okay for someone to speak to you that way”. Geralt paused, sighing quietly. “You know that, right?”

Jaskier shrugged, looking at the buttons of Geralt’s shirt. He realized he was still standing very close to the Witcher, so he took a step back. “I guess” he mumbled.

Geralt tilted his head to the side, incredulous. “You guess?”

Jaskier shrugged again. “I guess I’m just used to it”. When Geralt didn’t respond, Jaskier continued speaking. “I got a lot of shit like that when I was a child. And a teenager. Even in Oxenfurt. Playing the lute isn’t exactly considered popular among young men”. Jaskier paused, sighing and scratching at his cheek. “Neither does being with other men”.

Geralt gulped. “Being with other men?”

Jaskier rolled his eyes. “Being. Sleeping. Yes, I sleep with men, too. Want me to spell it out for you? I think you understood me well the first time”.

“I didn’t know that” Geralt muttered quietly. He felt a knot of anxiety tying itself in his stomach.

Jaskier chuckled. “Well, I wasn’t exactly exclusive about it. But I thought you figured it out by yourself already”.

“No”.

“Right. Um, okay. Well, um, now you know. Hope it doesn’t change your opinion about me”.

Geralt sighed, getting angry again. “Why would it change my opinion about you?”

“I don’t know” Jaskier’s voice sounded small and Geralt immediately regretted raising his voice at him. “You aren’t exactly easy to read, Geralt. I was worried you’d think something bad of me because of the makeup”.

“It looks good on you”. The words came out of his mouth before he realized what he said.

Jaskier gaped at him. And then his face lit up. “Huh. Wow. Thank you. Sorry, caught me a little off guard there... Unless you’re lying”.

Geralt rolled his eyes. “I’m not lying, Jaskier”. Geralt met Jaskier’s gaze, who was looking at him softly. Geralt felt his heart hammering against his ribcage.

“That’s very sweet of you, Geralt”.

“You don’t need my confirmation to wear something you like”.

“I know, but it’s still nice to hear. Especially from you”. If Geralt had looked away in that moment, he wouldn’t notice Jaskier’s gaze flickering momentarily to his lips. But he didn’t.

Realization struck Geralt hard at that moment. Jaskier liked men. Jaskier was staring at him softly, calling him sweet. Jaskier was looking at his lips.

Geralt stopped thinking as he walked over to Jaskier. He went with his gut. Jaskier slowly uncrossed his arms, dropping them to the sides of his body. He stared at Geralt with raised eyebrows, but didn’t move an inch, when Geralt stopped right in front of him.

Feeling brave and stupid, Geralt slowly raised his hands to cup Jaskier’s cheeks. Jaskier closed his eyes momentarily, leaning into the touch. He opened them again, staring at Geralt with expectation. Geralt hummed softly, stroking Jaskier’s cheek with his thumb.

“I lied” The Witcher murmured, leaning in closer, his lips almost touching Jaskier’s. Jaskier let his eyes fall half closed, parting his lips slightly. “About?” Jaskier whispered.

Geralt looked at his lips before looking back to his eyes. He moved one hand from Jaskier’s cheek up to his hair, fingers tangling themselves in the soft, brown locks. Jaskier sighed quietly in pleasure.

Geralt titled his head to the side, his nose brushing against Jaskier's. “I don’t think you look only good like this. I think you look beautiful”. Jaskier closed his eyes and leaned in, brushing his lips softly against Geralt’s. Geralt responded by gently catching Jaskier’s lower lip in his mouth, sucking on it lightly. Jaskier pressed his body against Geralt’s, tangling his fingers in the Witcher’s long hair and tugging lightly.

Geralt was sure at this point that he was dreaming.

He licked at Jaskier’s lips and Jaskier parted them, allowing Geralt’s tongue to explore his mouth. When Geralt’s tongue met his, Jaskier moaned into the kiss and the sound of it drove Geralt crazy. He slowly walked Jaskier back, pressing him against a nearby rock. Jaskier responded by sitting on top of it and wrapping his legs around the Wicther’s thighs, pulling him even closer. Geralt groaned into Jaskier’s mouth as their erections pressed together. Jaskier started to feverishly unbutton Geralt’s shirt, his hands slipping over the Witcher’s broad chest. Geralt responded by gripping Jaskier’s ass and grinding against him.

“Fuck,” Jaskier gasped. “I want you. Here. Right now. On the grass”.

Geralt chuckled low in his throat, moving down to kiss Jaskier’s neck. “Not here. Too dangerous”.

“I am not waiting all the way back to the inn, Geralt”.

“Why not? It will give us something to expect for, once we arrive”.

Jaskier pouted at him and Geralt looked up and felt his heart melting. He stood up straight, leaning his forehead against Jaskier’s, his eyes boring into his. Jaskier chuckled, sneaking an arm under the Wicther’s shirt and stroking his hip bone. The touch made Geralt visibly shiver.

“I should’ve worn makeup a long time ago” Jaskier murmured with a smile.

Geralt rolled his eyes fondly, kissing Jaskier again. He pulled away momentarily to say “You’re a fool to think that this is just because of the makeup”.

He gave Jaskier’s ass a firm squeeze, causing him to gasp into his mouth.

“You. Me. My bed at the inn. Now”.

(to be continued!)

[characteroulette]

all right I feel like I have to talk a bit about DGS2 (the actual gameplay and story stuff) before I do a deep dive into the theme because like. I have a lot to say that doesn’t pertain to the topic so here’s a few things:

(first, some not so spoiler things)

The way that there’s a musical build-up to the really big turnabout moments is TIGHT. like holy shit, having there be a prelude to Ryuunosuke’s Objection with less instrumentation is so good, it got me freaking hype every time (and also laugh really hard when I’d fuck it up and the music just cuts out)

For that matter, having a twist on the usual system of “if music stops, you are correct!” by having “if music stops, you are wrong” is so good. It’s a very subtle thing I don’t think many would notice, but I did and I really appreciated it as a little detail

Also, the way they finally figured out how to mix and match expressions with each talk sprite! seeing Ryuunosuke make different emotions while in the same body position was wild and I noticed it like every time it happened, it made things a lot more intense honestly because like. wow they can emote a lot more now!! This one small detail makes me excited for a potential AA7 because more expressions!! hell yeah!! (this is the one thing I’ll accept the 3D models for whoop)

(okay, onto spoilers stuff)

I love how Case 1 was constructed. Susato is good and I love her a lot and seeing her actually be a teenager who doesn’t know everything (while also giving her a better understanding of what Ryuunosuke has to go through) was awesome. Seeing the Judge as a character off the bench, also, was wild and really cements how hard they went with the story this time.

Though it is wildly weird how every dude calls her super attractive in her disguise. That’s a bit unsettling, she is 16. It’s okay when Haori (/Rei) does it because they’re the same age, but literally every other older male character doing it is a bit gross, c’mon guys

I hated the beginning of Case 2 because I’m all ready not a fan of flashbacks that are like “oh hey remember this thing we never acknowledged or talked about? that happened” and sure there were a few hints in DGS1-4, but like. It rubbed me the wrong way up until the first day of the trial was halfway through. This was also the point where I was getting really, really fed-up with the Summation Examination (and grateful that they actually didn’t continue Apollo Justice’s jury system in the mainline games because holy shit I hate all of these people I feel like Kristoph goddamn)

Can we just talk about how they gave Lord van Zieks a twink boyfriend?? Also I’m a dumbass who looks at the character design for Enoch Drebber vs. Dr Sith and thinks they’re related purely because their hair is a similar colour. Even though they are decidedly not related. This case was hella though

Also it made me laugh that Lord Stronghart is basically like “Okay Ryuunosuke I guess I can allow you back into the courtroom” and immediately Ryuunosuke tears open EVEN MORE government secrets like what a legend. Phoenix absolutely inherited this penchant for uncovering the government’s darkest secrets we stan the Naruhodou clan

I don’t like how the final case was split between 4 and 5, the cut off in 4 seemed really abrupt. I get why they did it, because there was a lot to reveal in this trial, but the ending of 4 jarred with me. It just didn’t seem like a good stopping point.

That being said, Asougi makes a perfect prosecutor opponent and I can’t believe these galaxy brains over here really decided “what if 1-4 but with two games worth of build-up and all of 4-1���s dread BUT MORE” like holy shit does it work. And I sorta had an inkling that this is where the story was going, of course you’d have to defend the Reaper of the Bailey (because even Ryuunosuke, despite trusting van Zieks, is very often like “yeah but he’s probs a murderer though”) and of course you’d have to fight against your best friend to do so it’s just. *chef’s kiss* perfection I loved it

And van Zieks’ speech at the end. word for word, I called it. I fucking called it like I saw it and word for word I was 100% right, that was such a hype moment for me. I can’t believe I read van Zieks’ character from moment one so well holy shit

All the talk of Asougi being “totally different” than how they remembered him also kinda. fell flat. like we knew Asougi for all of one case, you guys, we have zero reference for who you’re talking about. That being said, Asougi didn’t actually seem all that different for me. Like, I wouldn’t have known he was a hothead if I hadn’t read his profile in DGS1-1, but with that knowledge, everything Asougi did during 4 and 5 made sense to me for his character. I dunno what the hell Ryuunosuke and Susato were talking about, so their worries kinda bounced right off me whoops.

I expected the ending to be more bittersweet, considering we’re leaving all our friends behind to head “home”, but I’m surprised at how heartwarming and genuine it was. All of them promising to meet again is great, very tooth-rottingly sweet. And Iris recognising Sherlock as her dad!! I’m weak for that sort of thing ;w; ;;;

although one last gripe, I kinda hate how the narrative definitely pushes a sort of Ryuunosuke/Susato tone. She is 16 and he’s at least 23~24 (judging from Asougi’s age), Capcom you have to stop doing this. Especially with the AA series. Japan, in general, you have to stop doing this please I’m begging you it’s gross and I hate it

but yeah overall, very good game. as a stand-alone, I’d say it’s better than the first by a slim margin, but together they make one hell of an experience, I’d highly recommend it

[jiminsfault]

❥ pairing: Jungkook x reader

❥ genre: non-idol!au, nc17 / fluff, the tiniest amount of smut, a bit of crack, romance

❥ word count: 7.5k

❥ summary: Jimin wanted to play matchmaker and you fell right into his love trap.

❥ warnings: a lot of sexual comments, Reader has a fixation on hygiene?, Jimin is gay, side Yoonmin (it’s not really much but present), sexual tension, Jungkook probably has a Noona kink, use of korean honorifics (only a bit), Reader is super awkward, Jungkook is gonna steal your heart, more sexual tension, Jungkook knows tiktok, making out, kisses, it gets heated a bit, a lot of love, shy boy!Jungkook, more love

❥ thank you for this great header heathy! @shadowsremedy​ uwu

“Hey, uhm. Could you…,” Jimin started his sentence next to you, lying on your couch, “would you go on a date with me?”

You just sipped on your glass of coke, hearing this, you almost spat it out. With wide eyes you turned towards him and couldn’t keep your mouth closed, once you gulped the drink down. “No?” He asked, seeing your reaction. His tone was questioning and he had eyes just as big as you had.

“No. What the fuck, Jimin? Why would I go on a date with you? Like, ever,” you rolled your eyes, looking at him with disgust. Not to misunderstand, Jimin was handsome and funny, always there for you when you needed him. He encouraged you to go out and meet people and sat through movies with you, when you needed to cry about the boy who broke your heart.

But that’s exactly why you wouldn’t ever go on a date with him. Jimin was your best friend ever since high school, when he sat down next to you, a new student from Busan and just moved to seoul. He didn’t know anybody but when he sat down next to you, you smiled at him and explained to him what the class was about. Ever since then, you both were like paper and glue, sticking together for whatever troubles you had. You know too much about the guy, couldn’t ever see him in a romantic way. Plus, he’s gay, so.

Jimin rolled his eyes, too, sitting up and throwing all the crumbs from his chips onto your couch. He’s going to be cleaning this. “No you dummy, not like that. Just accompany me out with two guys and-”

“I will not have a foursome with you and some random dudes you found on Grindr!” You screeched, holding your pointer finger up and successfully stopping him from speaking.

“Can you shut up for a second? I don’t ever wanna see you when you get down and dirty with someone. You can keep that for yourself, I already had to find your vibrator,” shaking his head, he shuddered at the memory, “that was enough trauma.”

“I’m trying to tell you, it’s kind of like a double date. Except, the two dudes don’t know that yet. I really wanna fuck this one guy but he didn’t get the memo so he invited his friend when I said we could meet up sometime.” Another eye roll while he threw a chip up in the air and caught it with his mouth. He continued to speak, while chewing, making you cringe at his disgusting behavior. “His name’s Jungkook, the friend of his. You’re gonna come with and distract him from me and my snack. I just want some alone time to make him my sl-”

You held your hand up again, looking away. You didn’t want to hear what he had to say. “Fine, okay. If I come along, what’s in it for me? I have to spend my evening with some rando, getting him away from his friend? What if that dude doesn’t want to be alone with you?” Your face gave your doubt away, looking Jimin up and down.

“That’s the thing, Y/N. He doesn’t know that he wants to be alone with me yet. After that evening, when he realized what good of a catch I am, he definitely won’t get enough of some good alone time.” You scoffed, when he wiggled his eyebrows up and down. Reaching forward, you snatched the bag of chips from him and ate some yourself. “And what’s in it for you, my sweet darling? Jungkook’s fucking hot, too. I’d want to bite his ass, but he’s straight as an arrow.”

He fake pouted, shortly after his devilish smirk came out because he could tell that you were considering it. “Do you have a picture? I’m not gonna let you trick me like last time,” the trust you once had in him to hook you up with someone was long gone after he told you he’d found the man of your dreams, until the guy turned out to look like he drank beer for fifty years and hadn’t showered for much longer.

“No, but I can describe him?” You tsked, standing up from the couch and going to the bathroom. Jimin could lie to you all he wants, you’re not gonna waste your time with this. “C’mon! Help me get some ass! Please!”

You snickered as he wailed in the living room, already having decided to help your friend out a little. But he didn’t need to know that just yet, teasing Jimin was too much fun.

“So you’re sure this guy won’t be a creep?” You checked back in with Jimin for the nth time. He could never be trusted when he was trying to get into some dude’s pants.

“Yes, Y/N. I’m a hundred percent sure and if I’m lying, you can absolutely cut off my balls and serve them for breakfast, yeah?” It was laced with humor and he side eyed you from the passenger's seat in your car. Breathing out, heavy with annoyance, you nodded.

This couldn’t be the worst, you supposed. “What happens if you and your twinky hit off and y’all wanna leave? Am I supposed to stay with this Jungkook guy?” 

“He’s not a twink, Y/N. You’ll see, Yoongi is really nice!” His voice reached high ends and you scrunched up your nose. Even though you dressed up in a deep blue dress that was bordering on mid thigh, with your favorite heels, comfortable but still chic, you were full of doubts. Yes, a movie with Jimin and additional possible friends would be nice, but the risk of an unhygienic or rude date is still present.

“I can smell your worries,” Jimin said. You looked at him quickly and saw that he was watching you intently. “Jungkook really is a nice guy. He’s younger than you but he got his manners. And he’s a smart one,” he went on about your date for the rest of the way to the cinema and once you parked the car, he finally stopped talking.

“If you’re lying, prepare your balls,” you threatened, looking at him with sharp eyes. He nodded with a smirk and jumped out of your car.

You followed him, linking your arm with his after he waited for you and together you walked towards the entrance of the cinema. Inside, the entrance hall was bustling with people buying tickets and snacks, walking to the assigned rooms to watch movies. Children were running around and groups of teenagers filled the ticket box office.

Jimin already went to complain about how long they’d have to wait but then a guy approached. He had black hair, was about the same size as Jimin but had a bit of a smaller frame. His face was feline like and he seemed to know exactly who to talk to. “Jimin?” His voice sounded when he was only a few steps away and with a happy noise, your friend let go of your arm and fell into the arms of the man.

“Yoongi! How are you, where’s Jungkook?” He blabbered quickly, laying his arm around this Yoongi’s shoulders. Now that you thought about it, you never asked how Jimin met this guy. When they were closer to you, you smiled at Yoongi and introduced yourself. He seemed a bit shy, shrinking into Jimin’s frame when he greeted you. It was cute and suddenly you knew exactly why Jimin was so keen on meeting him. 

“Jungkook is getting us popcorn, one sweet, one salty because we didn’t know what you guys preferred. Also drinks, I hope coke is fine?”

Jimin and you both agreed and once the both of them started conversation, you started to look around more. They seemed to get along well, why were you even here? And where is this Jungkook? The snack checkout was still full with people and considering the lack of knowledge you had about his looks except ‘he’s handsome’, your searching was hopeless.

You decided to grab your phone out of your small purse, checking the time only to see that the movie should start in about ten minutes. “Guys, why don’t we buy the tickets? We’ll miss the start if we wait longer,” you trailed while you still looked at your phone, overlooking the messages a group chat sent.

“Already taken care of,” a smooth voice announced from behind you. It caught you off guard, so you shrieked a bit and clutched your hands to your chest. A giggle was heard and shortly after, the person to the voice stood next to you, hands full with popcorn and drinks. The two men across you, still in conversation, took a drink each, Jimin holding a popcorn bag as well. “You must be Y/N, yeah? I’m Jungkook,” he said. Once you finally looked at his face, he was quite tall so you had to look high up, you saw a very handsome face.

He had perky and cute lips that seemed strawberry pink, a small mole underneath and his smile was cheeky and adorable. With his smile came bunched up cheeks and his eyes seemed to carry his happiness. The light brown hair was partly over his forehead, a small gap let you see a bit of his eyebrows, strong and dark. His frame was wide, muscly it seemed. He was wearing a jeans jacket with a white shirt underneath and ripped pants that hugged his wonderfully thick thighs. Was he a god or something?

Everyone noticed your quietness and to cover the awkward pause in conversation, Jimin laughed and went in to hug Jungkook. “Nice to see you! Yoongi told me a bunch about you. This here is Y/N, she can be a bit shy around new people,” he made show to hold your shoulders and make you look at him. Your cheeks glowed up with heat and an embarrassed laugh made it out from between your lips.

“It’s fine, I’m sure we can get used to each other inside,” Jungkook said with a friendly tone and you were glad that this was all that was needed for the small group to get moving. Jimin trailed in front with an arm draped around Yoongi’s waist and he looked back to wink at you. “C’mon, don’t wanna miss the ads, huh?”

This Jungkook really had an effect on you like no one else did. For god’s sake, you were older than this guy and you acted like a schoolgirl. Get a grip, Y/N!

With a heavy intake of breath, packing your phone back into your purse, you walked towards the three that were already a bit up the stairs. Arriving next to your date for the evening, you looked at his side profile. “Should I take something from that?” Pointing to the drinks and the bag of popcorn in his arms, you kept looking at him, between glancing down to make sure you didn’t miss the final step and walked behind Jimin and Yoongi. Did they even know which room the movie was playing?

“I got it, thanks,” he said, smiling down at you. Pressing your lips together, you nodded. “You’re a year older than me, right?” His question confused you a bit, after not much conversation he brought up age in an awfully weird way.

“Uhm… yeah, I think so? Jimin said I’m older than you, so,” you shrugged your shoulders and looked in front of you, walking through the doors of hall D. You saw your friend and his company walking up towards line 47 and they sat down on seat 4 and 5. “Do I go past them or do we sit here?”

You pointed at the seats 2 and 3 and looked at Jungkook. He scrunched his nose and you could see his eyes smile again. Nodding his head to the seats you were pointing at, he sat down shortly after you did too. He sat next to Yoongi, which made you be the furthest from your friend and slightly on edge. Jimin said he’d be with you until you were comfortable, but you weren’t sure if you were ready to be on your own with Jungkook.

The room was already dimmed down, the ads weren’t playing yet, so it was still relatively bright for a cinema. “Which popcorn do guys have?” Jimin asked from the end of your small row. Jungkook grabbed one popcorn and held it in front of you, looking at you with a grin.

“Find it out?” You gulped, raising your hand to grab the flake, but Jungkook held it closer to your mouth, making you open your mouth and taking it from his fingers with your lips. They touched the tips of his fingers briefly and you felt a spark of warmth in your belly, as well as your face. He still looked at you closely and didn’t waver from your face, meanwhile you looked sideways towards the screen to avoid his eyes. You munched the popped kernel and licked your lips.

“Salt,” you stated, shyly looking at the still smiling man who now nodded. Jimin could’ve just tried his own popcorn to find out that they had the sweet one. You furrowed your eyebrows and looked at your lap. Why did he tell you to dress up? Jungkook was only wearing a jeans jacket and Jimin himself wasn’t that dolled up either.

Gnawing on your lip, you blended their voices out, only to be poked at your shoulder. You looked over, noticing that Jungkook probably tried to talk to you. “Is salt fine with you?” You nodded, calming yourself down. Right when he put your drink in front of you to have it, the lights got turned off.

“Oh no, now I can’t see the holder,” you murmured more to yourself. You clumsily tried to place your drink into the round plastic on your seat to your left but almost dropped the cup. Hissing out a curse, you tried again but failed. Suddenly you saw through your peripheral vision that Jungkook moving next to you, leaning across your body and taking your cup from your hold, finding the holder and sitting back into his seat. Stunned, you were glued to your place. Your breath was quick, Jungkook smelled nice and the way he leaned over you and completely covered you made you a bit unconcentrated. The advertisements started blaring out of the speakers but people were still talking, chewing their snacks and slurping their drinks.

“Noona,” Jungkook suddenly murmured right next to your ear. You felt his breath on your cheek and his presence was so hard to ignore. “Are you fine? You seem uncomfortable,” he continued, voice laced with obvious worry.

You looked to your side, making his face out with the light of the screen in front. It was close but he kept his distance once you faced him. “I’m a little nervous,” you whispered honestly. “And I’m overdressed.”

He giggled cutely, looking at the screen for a moment, where a movie trailer was now playing, but turned back to you. “Maybe a bit,” he admitted. He paused, seeming to think about his words. “But you look really pretty, Noona.”

He turned his head slightly to the side and smiled at you, fumbling around with your purse in your lap and avoiding his gaze. The cinema filled even more up and before the advertisements were fully over, there sat a man right in your viewpoint. A very tall man. You huffed, going left and right to see over his head, but to really see something, you’d have to lean over Jungkook. Taking a glance at him, he was casually talking with Yoongi and Jimin, they had picked a conversation up while you were busy. Munching a bit on the popcorn and sipping from his drink, he looked almost cute, wouldn’t he be so attractive that you couldn’t cope. His jeans jacket was still on and he spread his legs, slouching a bit in the seat to get comfortable. You usually hated it when men took up space like this. Jimin constantly did it to get on your nerves and if you would have half a mind, you’d see that he’s doing it tonight as well. Something about the way Jungkook made it look like changed your mind. It was suddenly not as gross, you’d rather get a personal feel for the meaty legs and the man was so attractive, you were sure his body had to be as well.

With a quick look to his side, he noticed you stopped squirming. But when he looked at the head in front of you, he could tell that it still very much blocked your view. Rasping his throat to prepare, he leaned over to you and came close, “do you want us to switch seats? I can probably look over him.” You jumped, slouching into your form and when you looked to your right, you saw that Jungkook was ready to stand up. 

“No, it’s fine,” you whispered, laying a hand on his wrist that was nearest to you. He looked at the contact and you spluttered, realising your touch. He looked up, the dim lighting making it hard to really read his expression. With an audible sigh, he gave up the advance of switching seats, but still wanted to help you.

“Excuse me, Sir?” He leaned forwards a bit. The man in front of you turned over and looked at him, demanding what was the problem. “My girlfriend can’t really see with you in the view, would you mind scooting up the row two seats? It doesn’t seem like more people will come.”

You covered your face, wanting to disappear. Jungkook couldn’t just talk to a stranger like this, calling you his girlfriend. But to your surprise, the man nodded, smiling friendly and saying that he figured it should be alright, switching seats and then checking back that everyone could see. With gaping eyes, you looked to your seat neighbor and shook your head slowly. He grinned at you and leaned back, starting a conversation over how great he is, sarcasm obvious in his tone, but you still agreed wholeheartedly.

The movie started, the lights got even lower and you finally could lean back and relax. Until you realized one crucial thing, Jimin lied to you once again. The little fucker would get some nice bruises once you were done with him, he picked out a horror movie without telling you. In fact, you thought you were here to watch a family friendly animated movie, not something about dead dolls. He probably just wants his twink to be scared and hide in his arms and yet you have to suffer through it.

You tried to hold in your screams and whimpers at the first scary scenes, but Jungkook still noticed the stiffening of your posture and the small shrieks you let out. Without you even really noticing, he pulled you close and whispered in your ear, “you scared?” Nodding, you looked at him with terror in your eyes and he chuckled deep in his chest. You felt it through his jacket, your shoulder at his front. At the opportunity, you looked at the men next to Jungkook. Yoongi was laying in Jimin’s arms, hiding his face in his neck when the screen gave away jump scares and shrill noises.

“You can hold onto me, if it helps?” Jungkook suggested. At this point, you were willing to try anything. So you clutched onto Jungkook’s upper arm, pulling him a bit in front of you to hide behind his shoulder when the music started to build up.

As you left the movie hall, credits rolled and popcorn collected, you staggered out into the light and took in a big breath of air. You survived. Never in your life had you regretted meeting Jimin this much, the guy still had the nerve to laugh at you and mimic your shocked eyes. Yoongi giggled next to him, seemingly more attached than before the movie and you asked yourself if you really were needed to give them privacy.

“I think I’ll go to the bathroom, too. The ride home will be long,” Yoongi trailed, pointing behind him as he started walking backwards. Jimin nodded, waving cutely and turning back to you. Jungkook attended the bathroom as well, which made you wait on them now.

With a cheeky grin, Jimin looked at you expecting. “So? What do you think about Jungkook?” Rolling your eyes, you walked away from him, in search for the nearest chair to sit on. 

“Jimin, I have an assumption and if I’m right about it, I’ll kill you.” The seriousness in your tone made him press his lips together and look at you. “You and Yoongi know each other well enough already, yeah?”

Your friend tried to avoid looking at you, moving from foot to foot and laughing nervously. “Well,” he started, puffing his cheeks with air. “We do know each other, but we don’t fuck! Yet. He never took my flirting seriously, which is why he invited a friend when I asked him out.”

He looked at you with puppy eyes, making you sigh. “But there was more behind me joining tonight, right? This seems like a setup.” Crossing your arms in front of your chest, you looked behind Jimin to see when one of the others came back. Your friend bit his lip, slowly nodding.

“Y/N, I know Jungkook, so I know that he’s such a great guy for you. When Yoongi said he’ll bring a friend, I asked him to bring Jungkook,” he admitted. “Getting you out of your room has been hard enough for a few weeks now, but you rarely meet guys. You always cry about your ex and that you’d never find the right one, so…,” he trailed off.

“So you took it into your own hands and made me come here, dolled up like this? You chose a horror movie, how cliché of you. The seats?” The wild guesses made Jimin squirm, you catching his plan head on and exposing him.

“Give him a chance, Y/N. He saw pictures of you and I told him a bunch, he thinks you’re really cute and Yoongi probably listens to him swoon about you right now! Nobody takes this long for a wee.” You laughed weakly, not knowing what to think of this.

Exhaling, you looked at Jimin for a long, quiet pause. “He’s really cute,” you said with finality. He made a show of fist bumping the air and congratulating himself. “But you can’t just play matchmaker with me.” The guilty look was back on again, puppy eyes and wobbly lip.

“Y/N, but you like him, right? Will you see him again?” He said in his baby voice. You laughed at this, closing your eyes and shaking your head. “No, really, will you?”

You had to think about that. Jungkook was handsome, smelled good, his hair seemed washed. He looks like he’s hygienic and he was really nice to you as well. Funny, in his own way and he helped you out multiple times. He flirted with you, too. It was a good date, after the awkward beginnings you felt comfortable and he was ready to protect you from the scary figures on screen. While contemplating all this, you bit on your lip and looked at your feet, not noticing the arrival of your company.

“I think I will, actually,” you started, raising your head until you saw Yoongi next to Jimin and realized Jungkook’s presence next to you. For the nth time tonight, blush rose to your face and ears, averting your eyes.

Jimin, not getting enough of teasing you tonight, started to smirk at his newest plot against you. “Hey, why don’t I come back to yours?” He turned to Yoongi, wiggling his eyebrows twice and laying his hand on his date’s waist. He made a noise of thinking before checking in with Jungkook, agreeing to Jimin’s suggestion afterwards. With horror in your eyes, you saw Jimin wave at you and Jungkook, faking worry and playing his act of, “I hope it doesn’t bother you to drive with Y/N?”

Watching the two descend down the stairs, heads disappearing, you turned to look at Jungkook, who already watched you. “What do you think you will?” The question seemed like he waited the whole conversation out to ask and you couldn’t keep eye contact with his intense stare on you.

“Ah, just… Jimin asked if I’ll study tonight!” You exclaimed, moving to jump off the chair but Jungkook stood in front of you, blocking the way.

“Did you enjoy tonight enough to meet me again?” He asked, his voice a tone darker than it was before and when you looked up at him, you couldn’t focus on just one feature of his. His broad frame covered you completely once again and his smell invaded your senses. Feeling a bit dizzy, you put your hand on his biceps. He felt your apprehensiveness and held you by your waist to support you.

Being shy about this kind of thing, you looked down and nodded quickly. “Yeah, I…,” you started, looking up again and being assured with the way his eyes didn’t waver from your form, “I’d really like that.” He smiled, nodding slowly and helping you get down from the high chair.

“So, can I ask you for your number, then?” He was blushing a bit himself, touching his ear when he waited for you to tap your digits into his phone. He promised to text you soon, said he couldn’t wait to meet you again and asked you all kinds of questions to find out what date idea you liked most.

In the end, he had a few ideas that he wrote down and said he needed some more time to think about it. You giggled at his cute behavior, asking him to lead the way for his place, once you were in the car. He helped you navigate and thanked you for getting him home, wishing you a good night and a safe drive back to your place. You nodded and reminded him of texting you, hearing a ping only moments after he closed the car door to walk the driveway up.

Checking your phone, you chuckled when you saw a message by an unknown number, ‘how soon can you see me again?’

It turned out to be very soon, actually. Just the next week, Jungkook organized a date for the two of you, keeping it a secret where exactly he’ll be taking you. He told you to wear casual clothing, just a simple outfit and no heels. He teased you to not overdress again and you actually screamed. Getting your point across that it was Jimin’s fault was hard when Jungkook was cocky enough to assume you wanted to lure him in.

But on the same friday, Jungkook picked you up with his truck, greeting you with his bright smile and congratulating you on the fitting clothes. He received your famous eye roll and off you went, onto the road. 

The ride wasn’t long, Jungkook assured you that it’s around the city and that it’ll be fun. You decided to trust him, waiting to arrive wherever he takes you. Talking to him came easy, over the last week you texted a lot and got acquainted enough to be comfortable around him and tell stories to fill the car. His music taste was exceptional and he promised to make you a playlist soon.

When he turned the corner into a parking lot, you looked around. “Where are we?” You asked, confused because there was no obvious sign hung on the house you were in front.

“You’ll see,” he said, smile steady on his face as he left the car and walked towards the house, your steps close behind him. Jungkook rung a bell, next to it was a handwritten name but the door opened quickly, not giving you time to figure the letters out.

“Jungkook,” you said quietly, looking at him from where he stood three stairs above you. He looked down at you with a quizzed face, leaning his head to the side. “This isn’t some spooky stuff, right?” You furrowed your brows as you hesitated.

He let out an airy laugh, “no, don’t worry, Noona.” He winked at you, not very smooth since he ultimately blinked but it was cute, so you let it slide. Just opening your mouth to repeat the response to the title he used, that you had messaged him a few times now, he mocked in a high tone, “it’s just one year!”

You shook your head, following after him as he walked up two floors. “Pottery?” You asked confused once you saw a sign on the door you halted in front of. He didn’t include that in any of the ideas over the last week, so it took you off guard. Not pegging him for the type, you looked at him as he opened the door that was left open by whoever owned this.

“Yeah, pottery. Jimin told me you never tried it, so I figured we could learn something,” he trailed, walking inside the open room where a register stood with a woman behind and a few people walking around. “Hello, I called,” he greeted the woman behind the desk. “Jeon Jungkook?”

The receptionist nodded, making a noise of understanding as she scrolled through the computer in front of her. “Yes, there it is. Room 3, it’s right to the left once you lead the hallway.” He nodded, looking where she pointed and after you greeted the woman yourself, the both of you walked towards where she instructed.

“C’mere, you’re so slow,” Jungkook teased as he looked back at you and stood in the room. You grumbled something about your short legs, he couldn’t hear everything, but laughed his heart out at your grumpy face.

“Do we do this alone? Aren’t we getting instructions on what to do?” You threw into the almost empty room. There were stools and round tables, you figured they were where you could do the pottery. On the side of the room was a table with already made cups and bowls that were drying and next to them sat black plastic boxes. “What’s in these boxes?”

Before he could take a guess, you walked to them and opened one, seeing clay inside. “Ooh, so this,” you grabbed a clump, “is what we use?” He chuckled at your many questions as he sat on one of the stools in front of a table.

“Bring it here and let’s do this,” he grinned. Taking the clump, you dropped it on his table and went back to close the door, figuring that you really wouldn’t have an instructor. You sat down on the other stool, scooting it closer to Jungkook to watch what he was doing. “My knowledge about this is limited to tiktoks and youtube videos, I’m just saying,” he warned, serious look on his face until it cracked.

He dipped his hands in a water bowl that stood next to him on the floor, tapping the chunk of clay and applying pressure. When it worked, both your eyes were wide and you made a sound of amazement. After he made a high pole, he pressed it down and used his thumbs to make a hole and rounded his hands to cup the outside, bringing it into a circled form. “I’m making a cup!!”

You continued watching him for a bit and then decided to get working yourself, getting clay from the boxes and patting the mass, forming it up, pressing down but…, “my clump doesn’t like me.”

You looked over at Jungkook with a pout and presented the flat cake of wet clay, a small dent where your thumbs sat. He giggled, standing up and putting his chair next to yours, much closer than before. “Gimme your hands, let me lead,” he said, holding his hands, that were full of clay, in front of you and waiting for your smaller ones. “Now that I’m thinking of it, we should’ve covered our clothes with something,” he thought out loud. It broke the tension that started to build and let you laugh about him freely.

Now that he leaned over your shoulder and held your hands in his to help you form the clay, it seemed like the spinning mass was playing just a side character. His incredibly good scent rose up to your nose again, filling your thoughts of him and his much bigger frame. The way he leaned over you and you felt his hair tickle your ear, sometimes feeling his cold earring on your cheek when he leaned even more in, was intense for you. Thinking was hard when all your brain could process was him.

Just when he managed to archive the cup form, your thoughts stopped being foggy, brain clearing up a bit. “Look at us, we’re out here making cups! Look at this,” he almost roared, excitement clear. His arms were tight around you and he wiggled you with him, holding your hands in his, all full of clay. You cheered too, trying to turn your head to look at his smile. But suddenly, he seemed even closer, immediately looking into your eyes and you gulped, feeling the heat rise to your neck and face. You stuttered back, making him stand up and removing his arms from around you.

“We should uhm, wash our hands,” you said, stiff and shy. He nodded and added that the hour was almost over and you’d need to be out of the room anyway. “What about our cups?” You asked, puppy eyes on display and almost speaking in a high, watery tone. He chuckled, assuring you that he can get them once they call him. When you left the room, you not only found a washroom but the woman who owned this place. She greeted you and asked if you had a good time, mentioning that they will put your cups out to dry and can either pick them up or come and paint them too. With hopeful eyes you looked up at Jungkook and without even seeing your pleading face, he agreed that you definitely had to paint them.

Once she left to remove your cups from the tables and set them out to dry with small name tags in front of them, you and Jungkook left to wash your hands. The restroom wasn’t gender seperated, since the house was originally meant to be actual living place. So there you stood, both incessantly rubbing your hands to get rid of the clay.

Jungkook got done much quicker than you did, not in the mood to make your skin sensitive so you rubbed carefully along your skin. “I don’t think I can get it off,” you pouted. “My skin will hurt if I scrub them too harshly.”

He took your hands in his and started carefully smoothing off the partially dried clay on your fingers. Once he was sure that your hands were clean again, he turned off the water and dried both your hands with the towel, patting your skin rather than rubbing even more. You held back a coo, finding it incredibly adorable of him to take care of you this way. When he looked up from your hands, your eyes met and the tension from back in the pottery room was building again.

“Y/N, would you hate me if I said that I really want to kiss you right now?” His voice was held quiet, considering that other people could request the washroom as well. You shook your head twice and scooted closer to him. He wore a small smile and reached down, taking one of his hands from your still towel wrapped ones and holding the side of your face and neck with it. His thumb caressed your cheek and he switched from looking into your eyes, down to your lips.

After a final moment of giving you the chance of declining, he closed the distance and kissed you softly. There was barely any pressure for the first few seconds, until he moved back and licked his lips, kissing you again but much more determined.

You reciprocated the kiss immediately, filling all your senses with Jungkook and not getting enough of him. An eager, tiny moan slipped out from your lips when he pulled off for a short moment, turning yours and his own head a bit as not to clash noses. He chuckled breathily into the kiss and let his hand roam to the back of your nape, getting you closer to him. He let go of your hands completely, taking the other one and holding you softly by the waist. He took a step forwards, leading you blindly against the sink and the kiss grew desperate. Your breath turned heavy and you couldn’t hold back from pressing against his lips more. Laying the towel down behind you, you grabbed at Jungkook’s shirt around his waist and held onto him. A whine slipped past you when he tentatively licked against your bottom lip, asking for more but still taking it without thought right after.

You both flinched when somebody knocked against the door, calling, “could this be hurried up a bit?” Jungkook looked at your face with flushed cheeks and swollen lips, eyes wide for a moment before he broke out into his wide smile again. He held your face with one and your hip with the other hand still and leaned a bit back to give you space to breathe.

“We’ll be out in a minute!” He exclaimed loud enough to be heard outside and looked back at you. “You’re okay?” His eyes held something in them but you didn’t have time to analyze it, nodding and turning to hang the towel up where it’s supposed to be. He took your hand in his, surprising you and opening the door. A middle aged white woman stood in front of the door, giving you both a judging look before Jungkook said, “that clay sure is tough to get off, huh?”

After that you left, laughing about the woman’s face and praising each other for the cups you made. Jungkook suggested milkshakes and burgers after you drove for a little and happy with the idea, you agreed.

After the food, not definable if it was more lunch or dinner by the time you were eating, Jungkook dropped you off at your place, wishing you a good almost night and saying that he’ll text you when he’s home. You blushed as you asked him to close his eyes and went in to plant a kiss on his cheek. His eyebrow jumped up at the contact and when he opened his eyes again, he grinned. You waved after you closed his door and turned around to walk into your apartment complex, smiling widely.

“Did you guys fuck tho?” Jimin asked you, hand raised and flopped over when he stood in the doorway with his weight on one leg and his hip popped out. His lips were pursed and he raised his eyebrows in expectation. You laughed lightly, shaking your head.

“No, we just,” you bit your lip, “kissed.” It was clear he didn’t buy it but he let it slide. Nodding multiple times, he walked over to the couch and flopped down.

“So, I assume you fell for my little trap, huh,” he grinned. “I was right about thinking you guys would work out, he’s the right amount of gentleman for you.”

He was right about this, you did enjoy Jungkook’s company and you started regularly texting and meeting up, sometimes just casual without the whole pressure of a date around it. He stole some kisses from time to time, always grinning too cute to get scolded for it and secretly, you loved getting attacked with his smooches when you least expect it.

“When is he gonna ask you out? What’s he waiting for?” Your noisy best friend opened up his snacks, throwing some into his awaiting mouth and chewing obnoxiously. You shrugged your shoulders, walking from the kitchen isle to the couch and joining Jimin.

You snuggled into the couch, next to him, watching a movie, when the door bell ringed. “Did you invite someone?” You looked up at Jimin from where you rested your head on his shoulder. He shook his head, watching you as you got up to see who was at the door.

The peephole revealed that Jungkook was standing in front of your door and you never opened it this quickly. “Gukkie! What are you doing here?” You squealed, falling into his arms. You weren’t expecting him at all, haven’t seen him for a week now and missed him the most. He chuckled, putting his arms around you and kissing your head.

“Had to visit the baby,” he talked into your hair, beaming in the affection. Giggling, you looked up, chin on his chest and grinning. “Hyung?” He asked, wide eyes and pitched voice.

Jimin greeted Jungkook back and they fell into small talk, you taking the opportunity to get some drinks, you and Jungkook’s selfmade cups for each of your drinks and a store bought one for Jimin. 

The cups were painted white by your request and once they dried you and Jungkook were able to paint them as you liked, making it your fourth date at the time. You painted the cups for each other, making it a surprise but both ended up with an equally cute design. Jungkook painted your name in his squiggly handwriting and added a heart next to it, painting a smiley and flowers. On his cup you painted colorful swirls on one side and on the other one you painted two stick figures representing both of you.

Once you sat back on the couch, Jungkook between you and Jimin, the teasing started. “Cute show you guys gave me, is there gonna be more later?” Jimin’s eyes were glinting with mischief.

Instead of laughing like you did, Jungkook slapped Jimin on the back and grinned stiff, “you could also just leave?” They both laughed overly exaggerated at it and slept each others backs, until Jimin took Jungkook’s head underneath his arm and rubbed his hair quickly, creating heat.

“Respect your elders, Jungkook. But you’re right, I should go,” he looked up in thought, “Yoongi is probably missing me,” he swooned. After standing up and pushing Jungkook into the couch one last time, he hugged you and took his leave right after.

Jungkook took a sip of his drink and tsked at how Jimin left his untouched, smiling at his cup like he did every time he was over and you gave it to him.

“Ah, my plan worked well,” Jungkook smirked, placing the beverage back on the table in front of the couch, leaning back into the comfortable pillows and looking at you. “Let’s cuddle, c’mere.” His voice turned soft regarding you, opening his arms and inviting you with a wiggle to his brows.

“Why are you here, Guk?” You murmured after a short moment. He exhaled and sat up a little, rasping his throat.

“I actually wanted to ask you something,” he said, very serious but the corner of his mouth moved up on his own. “Can we play Mario Kart?”

You blinked at him, bursting into laughter. “This is a very serious matter, Y/N. ” His face was stern, looking at you with no hint of humor.

“You made Jimin leave so we can play a video game?” The question wasn’t really in need of an answer, but Jungkook nodded anyway.

“You can be Peach and I’ll be Mario,” he said as he stood up and searched the drawers of the TV table for the remotes.

“Why do I have to be Peach? I always play Toad.” At this, Jungkook turned around abruptly and shook his head.

“No, that wouldn’t make sense,” he said. He was confusing you and your face made that clear but he was too busy with checking if the remotes had batteries in them, turning on the console and picking out the game of his desires.

“What are you trying to archive with this?” You giggled. “Why can’t I play my usual character?”

He pursed his lips and rolled his eyes up to think. “Okay, well… let me word it differently.” He walked towards you, still sitting on the couch, and placed the two remotes to his side. Sitting opposite of you with crossed legs, he bit his lip and looked as his fingers as he pulled on his sock. “I want you to be my girlfriend,” he said timidly, looking up at you to catch your reaction.

You smiled, because it’s simply Jungkook. He could always act like the annoyingly confident guy but he’ll never hide how shy he really could be. 

Nodding, you breathed, “yeah,” and squealed when he took you into his lap with a smile. “But can I still be Toad?”

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