#STOP M E IF YOUVE HEARD THIS ONE BEFORE

[scumpatrol]

yeah another modeling picture because i have no creativity 😭😭😭 cutie little towel for femv by veegee coming soon #Ad

[teetlesandnimjas]

Actually FUCK IT IM GOING ON THIS RANT NOW. YOUVE ALL HEARD IT BEFORE BUT I DONT CARE IM MAD

SO 2012 Mikey is an ADHD-coded character. I don’t know if this was on purpose or not, either way it’s extremely obvious in his actions and speech. Quick note, I am also ADHD, so this rant will be a little bias, sorry. I have seen 3 seasons of this show, so I’m not uninformed. I had to stop watching MAINLY BECAUSE OF THIS:

IN THE SERIES NOT ONCE IS IT ADRESSED THAT MIKEY HAS A GENUINELY DIFFICULT TIME CONTROLLING HIMSELF AND HIS BRAIN, AND HES NEVER BEEN HELPED ONCE! HE’S ABUSED AND TREATED LIKE A BURDEN! And I didn’t want to get “mad” or “uncivilized” but you have to admit that MIKEY GETS BEAT UP AND MADE FUN OF JUST FOR WHO HE IS. He doesn’t have a filter, that’s obvious. Yeah, he can be a little brat, but it’s not his fault. You think he wants to be HIT OVER AND OVER AGAIN? He makes a mistake? Smack! He starts talking a lot? Smack! His attention seeking behaviors- more on that later- start to kick in? SMACK! He JUST FUCKING EXISTS AS HIMSELF? SMACK! And the worst part is ITS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY? THIS IS A JOKE? No this is horrible! It’s- dare I say it- ABUSE! I know siblings roughhouse and playfully banter, but this isnt roughhousing, this is one sided and cruel. Mikey, who can’t control himself and his energy no matter how hard he tries, constantly RUNS AWAY from Raph, Leo, AND MAYBE EVEN DONNIE AT ONE POINT. The worst of it is Raph, yeah, OBVIOSULY. You put an “annoying” filterless teen in a room with a hotheaded asshole, not too good. But that’s still his brother. Raph also isn’t completely evil and horrible, he has genuine anger issues that could be solved with some quick education and a better outlet. BUT YOU’D THINK HE WOULD SPARE SOME KINDNESS FOR HIS F A M I L Y. It gets ridiculous! His solution for everything is HIT MIKEY. Now I don’t want to make assumptions, but one of my issues with my dumb dumb electric meat blob is the self-worth issues. I feel bad for what I say and do, because I can’t help it. Thankfully I have coping mechanisms and my ways of helping myself so I can work on staying quiet when I need to, and not feeling such loathing when I don’t. Yknow who DOESNT know what to do, and isn’t even sure why he’s like this and probably thinks he’s A SCREW UP BECAUSE THERES LITERALLY A WHOLE EPISODE ABOUT THAT? Mikey. AND YKNOW WHO DOESNT HELP? HIS FAMILY. YEAH THEY GREW UP IN THE SEWERS BUT YOUD THINK THE S C I E N T I S T WOULDVE NOTICED. But, no, Donnie verbally berates and belittles him. Leo’s okay, he does chase him around at only one point I can think of, and (albeit a headcanon that Leo’s autistic) he felt that Mikey disrespected something important to him, and yknow what fine as long as you apologize and don’t do it again, yeah whatever. It’s just ONCE. Raph hits Mikey EVERY EPISODE. AND ITS A J O K E??? N O. This genuinely influences young kids, especially young boys who were the target audience of the show, and this can HURT SIBLING RELATIONSHIPS. This normalizes the hitting and the yelling and the abuse. I don’t think siblings should roughhouse at all, and when they do it should be taken seriously and be treated as if two unrealated kids fought. A little fighting is natural, but THE LEVELS THE SHOW GOES TO HURTS. IT HURTS ME. I didn’t grow up with 2012, my parents wanted me to be all girly, but I watched 3 seasons about a year ago. And I hated the treatment of what I saw as a relatable character. Anyways stan Mikey, kill Raph, agree to disagree.

Oh and now because MIKEY ALSO HAS MASSIVE ATTENTION SEEKING BEHAVIORS here’s a mini segmant. I believe he is like this because of things like he wants constant attention and focus on him. He has a generally loud presence and he doesn’t try and hide it. The reason he probably doesn’t mask is because 1. He really can’t, he’s too exhausted to try because at this point nothing helps, and 2. Because he wants attention. And sadly that means negative attention too. A mix of ADHD and constant dismissive and negative behavior to you makes for a FUN RIDE when people aren’t giving you attention. And that’s really unhealthy. This probably stems either from or into self-esteem and anxiety issues. And I don’t want to say it’s HIS FAMILY’S FAULT but he spent 15 (or 16?) in the sewers with ONLY HIS FAMILY. If he needs constant attention and reassurance (and is infantalized which I ALSO HATE) then it’s probably because he didn’t receive enough positive attention when he was younger. In fact people even phrase things like “Attention-Seeking Behavior as a Symptom of Psychological Distress” which considering the show was “angsty” or “dark” I’m surprised they didn’t look into. If the show really wanted to be interesting I think they should’ve kept Mikey as an important character and not just comedic relief.

[nottodaylogic]

light.

Summary: EVEN MORE OF THE GAY LOGINCE! With a special question bECAUSE @shootingace / @ohbytheangel and I have NO. SELF. CONTROL. WHATSOEVER. Based on a post by @today-only-happens-once and dedicated, once more, to @sanders-sides-thuri :)

Pairing: Logince 

A/N: Takes place after sun., part 3/3 of the Logince Fluff series, written, again, with @shootingace :) this is the last part, super fun (and frustrating since I’ve never been to Olive Garden) to write! 

@hghrules @becca-becky @tinysidestrashcaptain 

Hope y’all like it! :D

The tile in one pocket and the box in the other seemed to almost, nonsensically, burn as Logan walked. They’d talked over this topic before, multiple times, so there was no logical reason to be nervous.

And yet.

“Date night?” he asked his boyfriend, kissing him on the cheek. Roman startled, accidentally mutilating the word he was typing. He just looked at it, betrayed. “I’ve prepared some activities,” Logan murmured.

Roman looked very excited. “Ooh, activities! I like activities!”

“I like you.”

Roman flushed, deep and red. “Aren’t you sappy today. What’s the occasion?”

“No occasion. I was simply stating a fact.” He hummed, extending his arm. “I have made reservations. Shall we leave?”

“Hold on, just let me finish this sentence.”

This meant “let me finish this scene because I have no self control and must write a lot even though there are other priorities.”

“Of course.” Logan dropped a kiss to Roman’s head and walked away swiftly to get his coat.

Ten minutes later, as he expected, Roman staggered in, haphazardly yanking his jacket on. Logan looked at his watch.

“Precisely on time.” He opened the door. “Come. Our destination awaits.”

“Where are we going?” Roman asked mischievously.

“You shall see.”

“Tell me? Pleeeeeease?”

Logan smirked, leaning in and pressing a short kiss to Roman’s lips. “Will that satisfy you for the time being?”

“Mmmm, I don’t think so.” Roman tugged Logan closer, kissing him deeply. He set his hand on the small of Logan’s back, like he was about to dip him, making Logan go breathless.

“Now will you tell?” Roman asked, pulling back.

“It’s a surprise,” Logan breathed, though he wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep it a surprise if Roman insisted on making him fall even more in love.

Roman leaned in and whispered, “rude.” He then dropped him.

Logan scrambled to his feet, thankful for his 18 Dexterity. “Hey. We don’t have to go on the date if you don’t want to.”

“No, I want to! It’s incredibly romantic, my dear. Surprises are exciting yet it’s so hard to wait!”

“As Virgil would say, ‘because you are an impatient baby’.” Logan guestuted forward, towards the car. “After you.”

—

Logan pulled into the parking lot. There weren’t many decent spots, but he managed to grab one.

Roman turned to him excitedly, seeing their destination. “Ooh, Olive Garden?”

“I come prepared to woo the server into giving us extra breadsticks to take home.”

“You’re the best.”

Logan blushed softly. “Thank you. Now, our reservation awaits us.”

They entered the restaurant and were seated right away, thanks to Logan planning ahead and making a reservation.

“Your server will be right with you,” the host said, showing them to their table.

Roman pulled out Logan’s chair dramatically. “Monsieur, your chair?”

Logan rolled his eyes. He sat down, pushing out Roman’s chair with his foot. “There. Now we are even.”

“You’re a nerd,” Roman said fondly.

Logan inhaled, ready to refute this claim, but instead said only: “I know.”

“Wow. And you say I have an ego.”

“It is true, why are you pointing that out?” Logan was confused and a bit flustered by how sweet Roman was being.

Roman snorted. “You’re adorable.”

“No, I am very serious. I am not adorable. Patton is the adorable one.”

“That’s true, but it doesn’t mean you’re not adorable.”

That’s when a server came up to their table, preventing Logan from protesting more. “Hey, I’m Remy, can I get you anything to get started?” He set a menu in front of the couple.

“Breadsticks,” Roman said, at the same time Logan said, “water, please.”

“Of course. Some waters and a basket of breadsticks?”

They nodded and Remy left. The two chatted about movies that they hoped to watch, the drama that Logan heard from his students, how Roman’s characters were behaving.

“I try to get them to do something! And usually, they’re pretty good with cooperating. Just, these past few days, they just… won’t.”

“Can’t you simply… make them do it?”

Roman made distressed noises. “But I can’t! It feels weird then, and out of character! Okay, okay, enough about my distress. Spill the tea that you hear from your students.”

“Alright.” Logan adjusted his glasses. “You will not believe what Lizzie told me Justin K. did…”

Roman clapped excitedly. “Ooh, that idiot Justin! What did he do this time?”

“Well…”

Logan told him, Roman’s grin growing, becoming more and more mischievous.

“So let me get this gay. He told this teacher, who was literally eight months pregnant, that he didn’t think women needed a maternity leave?”

“Mhm.”

“Has he ever been pregnant? Or given birth?”

Logan laughed. He loved Roman so, so, much. “Not that I know of.”

“Wow.”

“Yeah. I know that teachers aren’t supposed to have favorites, but Justin is definitely on my ‘not a favorite’ list. Not that I have any such thing.”

“You know, I think we’re supposed to be deciding what to order right now,” Roman mentioned.

“As if you don’t get the same exact thing every time we come here.”

“You got me there.”

“That’s a meme.”

“You got me there.”

Logan stifled a laugh. “I love you.”

Roman smiled. “Love you too.”

That’s when Remy came back to take their orders. Roman ordered spaghetti and tomato soup. Logan ordered lasagna and a Greek salad. A chat and two baskets of breadsticks later, their dinner had arrived.

Logan ate his lasagna and laughed at Roman’s jokes, but the weight in his pocket—why did he bring the ring, it might get lost, he didn’t need it, this is illogical—was very present in his mind.

And worse was the nagging thought that Roman might say no. Of course, they had talked about marriage, but you could never be completely sure of an outcome.

“Something on your mind?” Roman asked, his foot brushing Logan’s.

Logan smiled. “You.”

Roman laughed. “You’re so sweet. It’s great.”

And with those words, that laugh, Logan felt himself drawn back into the moment, the fears of a future yes or no gone for the time being.

—

When they returned back home, Logan brought out the scrabble board.

Roman raised an eyebrow. “Not even gonna ask me if I wanna play this?”

“You’ve been bringing up how you want to play Scrabble for ten days now.”

“True.”

They set it up, Logan allowed his boyfriend to pick the starting word (LADDER) (“what? It’s the only thing I can do!”), and the game began.

“Your turn,” Roman said, gesturing to the board.

Logan set down the letters R, O, M, A, and N.

“Hey, no! That doesn’t count, it’s a proper noun!”

“I’ve let you get away with many proper nouns over the years. Cut me some slack.” Logan sat back, gesturing to the board. “You go.”

Roman put down O, P, and E to write NOPE.

Logan tried not to take this as a bad omen.

He then added L, O, V to the E in NOPE, making it LOVE.

“Awww, you sap,” Roman teased, swooning. “That’s so sweet.”

They continued playing, Logan adding FOREVER and DEDICATION to Roman’s words (OCEAN and DISBELIEF)

“Is something amiss?” Roman felt his forehead, looking overly concerned for the comedic effect. “You seem to be exceedingly sentimental today.”

Logan brushed this off with a, “It was simply what I could make with my letters and the board.”

Roman eyed him curiously, but dropped the topic. “Your turn.”

Logan wordlessly set down his piece, putting it right next to ROMAN, so that it read ROMAN, will you marry me?

Roman started to protest about how “that’s not in the rules of the game, Logan!”, but then he stopped, obviously having read the piece.

His eyes snapped up, meeting Logan’s.

“You… you… Logan.” It seemed he couldn’t say anything more.

Logan slid out his chair, dropping to one knee, holding the box with the ring in front of him. “Marry me, Roman Princeton?”

“Lo… Logan, oh my gosh. Oh my gosh.” And then he was out of his chair, too, stumbling towards Logan. He leaned down, taking Logan’s face in his hands, kissing him softly. “Yes, yes, of course, yes.”

Logan let Roman pull him to his feet, his arms around Roman’s waist, holding him tight. “Roman. I love you. I love every moment we’ve spent together. I treasure every memory I share with you. And I’d like to make more memories with you. For the rest of forever.”

Roman nodded, pressing his his forehead to Logan’s shoulder. “Yes,” he choked out.

“Hey, Ro, don’t cry,” Logan whispered, rubbing Roman’s crisp, clean shirt between his fingers. “Don’t cry.”

But he would be lying if he said that he wasn’t crying a little too.

Because finally, finally, he would be marrying the love of his life.

Because… because he just loved Roman so much, loved him so much that sometimes he didn’t know what to do with all the feelings.

Because Roman was going to be his, his, forever and ever and ever.

“I love you so damn much, Roman.”

“I love you too.” Roman pulled back slightly, holding his hand out. “You going to… you going to actually put that ring on me?”

Logan laughed softly and slid the ring onto Roman’s finger, then pull Roman’s hand to his mouth, kissing the back of it. “I love you. I love you so much, Ro.”

“I know.”

Logan laughed, pulling Roman close and kissing him. “You're wonderful, Princey.”

“Mmm, I know.” Logan stared at Roman, deadpan. “Just kidding, you are too.” Roman nudged Logan’s chin with his nose then kissed his cheek. “Love you. So freaking much.”

“Dance with me?” Logan asked, the words spilling out of his mouth before he could really process what he was asking.

“Where’s the music?”

Logan tilted his head. “Sing?”

Roman snorted. “Well, we need some sort of background music, Lo. I can’t sing if I’m gonna kiss you, and I’d very much like to kiss you.”

Logan blushed, his breath catching in his chest.

“C’mon, babe,” Roman said. “Music.”

So Logan grabbed his phone, pulling up the “romantic songs for my nerd” playlist Roman had made for him.

On came As Long As You’re Mine from Wicked, and Logan pulled Roman close.

They danced and twirled and laughed together, Logan falling more and more in love. Roman was so beautiful, so loving, and Logan got to spend the rest of his live with him.

“I love you, Roman.”

“Yeah?” Roman whispered.

“Yeah.”

“Prove it.”

So Logan twirled Roman, then pulled him back, dipping him and kissing him softly.

Roman let out a soft gasp. “I love you so much,” he murmured, tangling his fingers in Logan’s hair.

“Love you too.”

—

Later, they lay on the bed together, staring at the ceiling, tired, content.

Roman curled up on Logan’s chest, so beautifully exhausted. “How long were you planning to propose?”

Logan thought for a moment. “A little while.”

“How long did you know you wanted to marry me?”

Running his hands through his fiancé’s hair, he responded, “Forever, probably. I just—I never imagined my future without you. And then a few weeks ago I realized that why not get married?”

Roman seemed to think this through for a moment when he asked, “Why me?”

The question took Logan by surprise. “Why you what?”

Roman looked directly into Logan’s eyes. The expression there was raw, unable to be described. “Why did you want to marry me?”

Because you’re the only person I’d ever want to marry. Because you’re the only person I’d ever want. Because you’re stellar. Because you’re funny and sweet and dramatic and unique and loving and thoughtful and romantic. Because despite loving you, I can’t find the vocabulary to express all of this. “Because I love you.”

“Aww, Lo.” Roman reached up, kissing Logan softly. “Now we get to plan a wedding.”

“But first we should go to bed.”

Roman’s eyebrows raised as he smirked, and Logan only slightly regretted his phrasing. “As you wish.”

Logan blushed, but nobody could prove it, so what did it matter?

—

Logan woke first in the morning, a stream of light illuminating the room. He glanced down at Roman, snoring, the ring on his finger shining.

And Logan knew that they would get to spend the rest of their lives like this.

[skizmin]

you’re my favourite constellation.

stargazing!au, friends to lovers with han jisung

(this giF IM SCREAMING CUTIE)

request from @straybin: Can I request a stray kids jisung friends to lovers star gazing au! Your aus are super sweet I loved the seungmin one!

(thank you so much ily 💝💓💖💕💞💘💗)

alright lets get straight into it

so youre a highschool student with an affinity for astrology, like, you love it

for your birthdays you get astrology books and maps and even once a really cool telescope!!

its just what you love, okay?

anyway, recently youd moved in with your cousin who lived alone and needed a roommate, plus it was closer to your school than your own home.

you parents practically shoved you in there with short notice (at least they were paying rent and grocery expenses) and you were like well okay

you didnt mind your cousin at all, but she can be a bit excitable and overbearing sometimes but you have to deal with it really

“dUDE i gotta show you something follow me”

you were unpacking when your cousin said this, you set down your telescope and followed her out the front door. your cousin lived in an apartment block basically, she was on the third story out of five. there was a very cute young family across the hall from you guys n stuff

anyway she kept going up and up these stairs and you were like where the fUck are we going im so tired

she laughed and said you were almost there and proceeded to push open a big heavy door

wow

you were in complete awe

in front of you was a massive open roof, the setting sun and the wide sky completely in view from all points, and when you looked up? oh my god it just seemed so clear

“you like stargazing dont you? youre allowed to come up here all you want as long as you dont make a ruckus yeah?”

you agreed, smiling W I D E and attacking your cousin in a hug

like,, two weeks later?

you still hadnt gone stargazing on the roof yet

on top of moving in and mid term school, it was a struggle to deal with so you just didnt have the time at the moment

untillll you had a falling out with a friend. it wasnt anything too serious but a few hurtful truths were said and the added stress of everything else going on, it was just overwhelming

so when you got home that afternoon, you packed a small box with your telescope, your notebook and pens, a couple of your astrology study books and two big blankets

then, after you made and ate dinner with your cousin, you made a big cup of hot chocolate (or coffee or tea or a moccha, whatever you prefer) and told your cousin you were going upstairs and youd probably be back late so youd take a key in case she was asleep

your cousin agreed and watched you balance the massive mug and your box in your hands and also the two big pillows you spontaneously grabbed as you walked out

arriving on the roof, you laid everything out, not bothering to set up your telescope just yet and you sat back sipping your hot drink

you didnt know when you started to cry but it happened, and soon enough you where silent sobbing on your own letting out a few sniffles here and there. life was just too busy and overwhelming at the moment

it was about half an hour later when you stopped sobbing, you were still crying, wiping your tears from your face every minute or so, this was when the door to the roof opened and shut

you thought it would just be your cousin so you stayed still and aited for her to find you and comfort you

the the felt a foot hit your thigh and heard a whisper shout of “hoLY FUCK”

you sat up, hastily wiping your tears as you tried to see the dark figure in front of you, they had turned on their torch and were now shining it directly into your eyes

“i am so sOrry i didnt even see you there, were you sleeping? oh god i cant believe i just almost stepped on you- wait? are you crying? oh my god”

it was some sort of god in front of you, you were sure. perfectly tanned skin, gorgeous doe like eyes, soft cheeks and pink lips. you were pretty much mesmerised, even as he crouched down in front of you

“hey, im sorry. i really didnt mean it its just dark out, are you okay? i didnt hurt you did i?”

he sounded so unbelievably guilty that you felt bad, snapping out of it you responded with a choked out “im sorry, im fine, its okay!”

the boy in front of you smiled out of relief, eyes lingering on you before looking at the set-up around you

“im jisung, i live on 2nd floor. i havent seen you around before, i didnt know we had new neighbours”

he looked at you and tilted his head in confusion, his eyebrows furrowing and his lips set in a slight pout. your heartbeat involuntarily picked up at the sight

“oh! im uh- im y/n, i just moved in with my cousin y/c/n, she lives on third floor...” you awkwardly and shyly looked down to the ground, hastily tidying up the mess of notebooks and your hot drink as he replied

“oh! y/c/n! i know her, shes really nice. how old are you? you look a bit younger than her honestly” his brows furrowed further and he smiled lightly when you looked up at him, he was still crouching in front of you

“oh, im 17, she lives closer to my school than my parents and she needed a housemate, so here i am!” you laughed really nervously and looked down at your fingers again

jisung smiled to himself, ah, theyre cute

“oh, im the same age then!” he laughed before looking away slightly, asking the difficult question, “are you sure youre okay? you look like youve been crying,”

dread crushed your chest, he’d seen you crying, this was really embarassing for you

“oh nothing! i was just- uh, i was just a bit stressed is all” you held your breath, hoping jisung wouldnt pry any further, you really didnt want to talk about it

he laughed good heartedly, “ah yeah, we all get a bit like that sometimes. what are you doing up here though? its freezing, are you studying or something? waiT IS THAT A TELESCOPE?!”

it was your turn to laugh, this kid was really positive and seemed to know how to take a hint

“im stargazing! my cousin said i could come up here but, if you need to roof then dont worry ill go down its no porblem”

you looked at his face this time as you spoke and oh my god stop smiling at me like that 

“stargazing? thats so cool! dont worry, i only came up here for some fresh air, my housemates are a bit loud. so what, do you just look at the stars and planets or?” he finally sat dwn next to you. “can you show me a constellation?”

you giggled and nodded, you whole body tingling because of the close proximity of your bodies and the idea of the stereo-typically romantic thing you were about to do. “we need to lay back okay?”

you laid back, he followed, his head was lost to to yours and his hands rested on his stomach, he turned his head to look at you

m i s t a k e

you didnt turn to him. you were bright red at the feel of his breath fanning across your face you kept your head straight on the sky

“now what?” he softly whispered it to you, your stomach violently dipped and your heart practically stopped

youre all “uhhhh uh- well, uh, you just um- see that sorta diamond of stars over there? and then it sorta uh, has a triangle on top?”

jisung follows your line of eyesight and tries to focs on specific stars that make out the shape, he sees it “oH! i see it!”

“yeah, thats lyra, its a harp basically.”

jisung squints and you lightly turn your head to him, not fully, just enough to see his face. “oh, it does look like a harp i guess, whys it there?”

“it represents the lyre of orpheus, who was a greek poet and musician, he was killed though...”

“wow, thats sad but also so cool...” jisungs phone buzzes, you see its a message from someone called minho, asking where he is

“crap, y/n, ive gotta go but um. i really liked talking to you and im really interested in the stars now, it seems like theyve all got stories. would you mind teaching me again sometime?”

he was scratching the back of his neck awkwardly

“oh! um- yeah of course i will, i mean, yeah definitely!”

you realised you didnt have his phone, so you couldnt really get your number for him

he saw you looking and spoke up “uh, maybe just next time, um, come and grab me? my apartment is number 6, im almost always there if im not at school really. just, whenever youre going up and you feel like some company, come knock on the door or something?”

you smiled, the thought made you nervous but you did want to see jisung again. “okay, of course.”

he smiled brightly at you, you cursed your heart again, “great! ill get going then, dont stay for too long okay? youll get a cold.” he stood up and waved to you

“bye jisung!” you call out softly as he walks away

you leave not long after he left, it felt boring on your own suddenly. you didnt even remember youd been crying at all, it felt like a massive weight was lifted off of your shoulders.

you slept so easily that night, dreaming of the stars and jisung.

a week and a half later? it was a friday night 

you were packing your box to go stargazing again when you remembered jisung, you wanted to bring him along with you. he might be busy, but you packed an extra couple of blankets and soem pillows and placed them just inside your door before you went downstairs to go and get him

you were so nervous as you knocked on the door, preparing for utter embarrassment. the door opened up tho

“oh, youre not the complex owner thank god.” you were greeted by someone possibly younger than you, he had reddish hair and a sweet smile. “how can i help you?’

you tried to block out the screeches coming from inside the apartment, you could hear about five voices screaming at once “im uh, im y/n, im from upstairs? i was wondering if jisung was here at all?”

he smirked, like he knew something you didnt. “sure one sec, im seungmin by the way.” he turned away from you and screamed into the apartment “jiSUNG, SOMEONES HERE FOR YOU, HURRY UP.” 

“coMING!!” was heard throughout the apartment followed by a “fELiX gEt ofF Of mE” and seungmin smiled awkwardly at you before a head popped past the wall into the entrance way

“oh! y/n! you came!” he tried to walk over to the door but you noticed a body dragging on his legs.

“jiSUNG PLEASE DO MY CHORES FOR ME.” the boy yelled at jisungs feet

seungmin laughed, looking at you saying “ill leave you to it” before jogging over to a tangled up jisung and who you presumed was felix and tearing felix from jisungs body, dragging him away

“uh, sorry about that, hes lazy and pathetic.” jisung laughed, so did you

“i was just wondering if you were free? i was about to go up to the roof..”

jisung smiled brightly, “of course, let me get my coat and phone.”

once he was ready you two went up to your apartment, you told him to come in and wait a bit while you made him a hot drink of hit choice, then you grabbed some pillows and your box and you both walked up the remaining flights of stairs to the roof

it was the beginning of a tradition really, youd go down and grab him, his housemates would call for him as soon as the saw you, before he left theyd whisper things into his ear that made him blush but you simply shrugged it off

after about two months of going up to the roof together, you admitted to yourself that you liked him

a lot

you liked his smile, his voice, how he was endlessly making you happy, you liked he warmth of when hed lie next to you and the way he’d rest a hand on your lower back, guiding you up the stairs. you liked his goodbye hugs and the way he’d hold your hands the one week you couldnt find your gloves. you liked how he was so interested in the stars like you, but you considered giving up looking at the sky to simply look into his eyes because they held galaxies within them. you liked the way he’d whisper your name to check if you were awake and the gentle touch of his fingertips when he brushed your hair out of your eyes

you liked him so much, you couldnt deny it. it crushed you in a way, you thought he would never like you back, and you increasingly got more nervous and drifted away bit by bit

one night, you were up on the roof and jisung sighed loudly, you asked him what was wrong

“can i rant a little bit? please?” jisung had puppy eyes as he sat up and looked at you, you sat up as well and nodded for him to go on

“ah, this is hard,” he started before looking at the pot plants next to your set up that were the centrepiece of the rooftop, 

“i um, basically i like this uh, this person right? i like them as more than a friend,” your heart clenched and dropped to your stomach. oh. this was heart break. “we’ve been friends for a while and i thought, well, yeah i thought id been quite obvious with my feelings. i hoped that their shyness was them maybe reciprocating my feelings but? maybe not. lately theyve just-”

jisung huffed and looked up at you again, your heart got caught in your throat, you could see he was nervous about telling someone about his crush and he looked sad talking about the unfortunate circumstances

“theyve been distancing themselves from me. they flinch away we i try to be more affectionate and- and they just dont seem like they like me anymore. not even in a romantic way, in a friend way. and im just upset i guess. ive never ever liked someone this much before, every night im filled with these feelings of just wanted to cuddle with them and take them on dates and hold their hands and- and kiss them. the whole package. it hurts, y/n. why dont they like me?”

the sad feeling you was feeling showed in your voice as you replied. “youre a great person jisung, theyd be an idiot not to like you, seriously. i cant think of someone more deserving of love than you.” you tried to nervously look into his eyes

“then why dont they like me y/n? no one ever likes me.” he was still looking down onto the ground

“i like you jisung.” 

oh no

oh no oh no oh no oh no oh no W O R D   V O M I T

you clenched your eyes shut, your heart was beating rapidly, you cant believe you just said that when hed just been speaking about liking someone else. you wanted to cry, to bury yourself alive, anything to get out of that situation.

“really? what?” he snapped his head up, staring at you wide eyed and shocked

“nevermind jisung, forget i said it, i didnt mean to make it awk-”

jisung cupped your cheeks, you felt his warm palms and cool fingertips before you felt his lips, slightly chapped yet soft

your mind was going crazy, you barely managed to move your lips along with jisungs before he parted away, still holding your cheeks and smiling widely

“out of all the stars in this world, youre the brightest y/n.”

you died inside before realising he liked you, all the things he said earlier were about you

jisungs eyes were hopeful, happy, loving, especially when you smiled at him so purely

“jisung, kiss me again.”

and he did, pulling you into his lap and letting you tangle your fingers into his hair

he even kissed you outside your apartment, giggling in happiness and tugging you into his body before saying goodbye

jisung couldnt remember a time he’d been this happy, and honestly, neither could you.

finish!! hope you liked it omg

[lovinglybaking]

shaka shaka

thank u @queen-of-the-highways for tagging me to write a song for every letter of my url! love u babey 

c - cornerstone by arctic monkeys

h - humility by gorillaz

a - aviation by the last shadow puppets

r - reckless serenade by arctic monkeys

m - michelle by the beatles

l - last living souls by gorillaz

e - essex dogs by blur

s - seperate and ever deadly by the last shadow puppets

s - stripped by depeche mode

d - dont sit down cause ive moved your chair by arctic monkeys

i - i broadcast by blur

s - stop me if you think youve heard this one before by the smiths

c - charmless man by blur

o - only the truth by the last shadow puppets

l - lie to me by depeche mode

i - i bet you look good on the dancefloor by arctic monkeys

z - ???? fuck if i know???

a - ascension by gorillaz

r - right to pop! by graham coxon

d - despacito

i tag @biggeggs , @sadb0ysims2 , @devilhopping , @dorianalbarn , @ellarochi , @seek-the-night , @radioclashh , @ibroadcast , @favouriteworst, @kidwithgun and @melody-brushie sorry if yall have done this already n also. love yall

[heatmiiiiser]

.

[yumenosakiacademy]

...ew diary entry. mostly for memory purposes, i guess?? uh.. dunno. warnings: unsanitary mention. uh idk what.. what else to put. sry im.. not good w taggin these kinda things. no one will prob read this anyway except for future me so... who cares, right. it.. doesnt matter.

okay so i tend to have a thing where i’ll wear a single bra forever and ever and i hate when ppl tell me to change it bc like.. it’s well-stretched out, yanno?? most of my other bras r too tight/i need to stretch em out a lot before wearing them or i start going “too tight too tight i think it’s Constricting me oh god” so i Luv my loose ones n i dont wanna get any other bras bc the 2 loose ones i have r comfy sports bras but mom always tells me to change mine bc it’s been “forever since it got washed n it has holes in it” (bc i wear it so much that it has holes oops but i dont mind) n this morning i was dodging the question/saying “whatever im fine” and my mom.. literally snatched my bra off of my bed before i could put it on bc i had just woken up n i was like “GIVE IT BACK” n she was like “no. im gonna throw this out or cut it up” n i was like “UHHH NO UR NOT.” n tried to pull it out of her hands n my hand grabbed some of her hair that was hanging down near the bra too n she was like “stop! tugging on my hair!” n  was like “THEN GIVE IT BACK. GIVE IT BACK!! i was gonna try to sew it up lter n i can wash it this evening if u want! thats what i did last time was i waited for nana to wash it then put it on at night!” n i was starting to cry 

but she finally got me off of the bra and started walking to the bathroom and i thought she really WAS going to cut it up and i was sobbing n i just kept going “STOP! STOP!! DONT DO THIS! PLEASE JUST-” and dad woke up bc his room is right next to mine n mom told dad what was going on and dad told mom to not cut it up but to keep it away from me/have me wear a new bra n that we have to get me new ones (he kept telling me that) n then yelled at me that i was “too attached” to it and it’s become “like my comfort item” and kept telling me that bc i hate change n i keep doing this or w/e n that i brokw down over something as simple as taking away that comfort item/bra he just kept saying “ROX THATS A DISORDER” or “YOU HAVE A DISORDER” idk but he said disorder like 2-3 times n i kept snapping at him and going “shut UP just SHUT UP!!” n i was still crying and out of the corner of my eye i saw mom throw it away and put the garbage bag outside n i went “nonNONONO STOP!” ni insulted dad or something i think bc he kept yelling or being angry n he got angry n got out of bed while i was in my room crying and putting on my other slightly-less-stretched-but-still-stretched bra (thank god i had it) 

n dad kept trying to talk to me n i think i insulted him, like i said, n dad was like “you know wht you need? punishment to learn to not talk back like that to me anymore. youve gone your life without being punished so you should get spanked” w/e something liek that n i backed up but i was still against the bed so dad tried to spank me like twice (i was still in my underwear i think tho (since i dotn sleep in pajamas) which.. is kind of uhhh) n on instinct and out of anger i shoved my nails into his arms bc he was behind me and eventually he backed up and i stood completely up n i also remember digging my nails into his hand/fingers but idk when and he looked over at me and told me to stop doing that w my nails (i tend to do it when i get grabbed by the shoulder/arm but this time was Harder) n he dug his fingernails (a lot shorter than mine so it didnt hurt too bad) into my arms n went “huh? how does it feel? not good, right?!” n idk what happened next but my back hit the bed n he was looming over me and he was saying something like “i kno u went to bed at 2 am last night- you’re using my kindness and doing whatever you want. do you think i’m an idiot?” or something like that. i kno he asked if he was an idiot n i curle d my lip n went “maybe.” n maybe somefin else n dad lightly slapped my face n after that was a blur but i remember i was still crying the whole time n dad tried to touch my arm n talk to me while i was doing my makeup n i was snarling n growling at him n telling him “DONT TOUCH ME. I DONT WANT TO SPEAK TO YOU” n kept telling me not to talk like that 

n i stormed out of the house witout a goodbye after getting done w makeup n hair n stuff n i quickly went over to the trashcan bc i knew she hadnt shoved my bra deep into the trashbag (n it was the trashbag we dont use too often. it has empty cat litter bags in it n some makeup wipes n other stuff) n i didnt have much time before i had to start walking to my bus stop or i’d be late for the bus n i didnt wanna ask dad or nana for a ride n i was worried thatbc i couldnt find it for a sec n i didnt wanna dig too deep into the trash but then i thought i saw grey/touched something soft n i pulled out! my bra! n shoved it into my backpack n my parents dont kno it’s there or that i did that hhh.... 

.......n then i wiped away a few tears that were starting back up and mentally played nepeta’s cute theme song in my head while walking to the bus and trying to not think of how much i wanted to die at that moment n stuff n i was p much calm by the time i got to the bus but i kept sniffling n stuff to clear the mucus in my noise ;;;;

also apparently nana mustve heard me crying out and sobbing bc i heard her muffled voice in the bg this morning (bc shes in several rooms away on the other side of the house) n when i called her to let her kno i was on the bus in the afternoon like i normally do, she immediately said “rox are you okay.” like. idek if she said hello before that or not but.. she mustve been worried... idk if dad n mom told her what happened either...

edit: when i got home dad tried to apologize (”im sry it got to the point where i hit you” or w/e or that he didnt wanna do it but i was too bitter n angry so i didnt care abt his effing apology) but i snapped at him again n told him to leave the roo n leave me alone n that i didnt want to talk to me n threatened to talk away m electronics so i tried to snap Less