#STOP BEING MEAN TO THE COWBOI BRO ;^;

[azulpitlane]

be aggressive l ln4

lando norris x dcc!reader summary: the internet is curious as to why lando suddenly has an interest in american football, specifically with the dallas cowboys masterlist

f1gossip

13,283 likes

f1gossip Lando Norris and Mclaren CEO, Zak Brown at the Dallas Cowboys game today in the AT&T stadium!!

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user his ass did not wanna be there😭

user lando?? american football?? huh???

user guys it was sponsored by hilton!! pretty sure thats why they attended

user makes sense cause bro looked miserable by the second half of the game

user a strange strange sight

user mf was bored the whole game except when the cheerleaders performed LMFAO

user the video of him locking in as soon as they stepped out in the field💀 ↪user WHERES THE VIDEO HAHAH? ↪user the video is all over twitter, cameraman did him dirty lmfao

yourusername

liked by landonorris and 12,379 others

yourusername victory sunday💙🤍💙

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user lesss goooo cowboys

user FAVE DCC

user in y/n we trust🧎‍♀️

user wait a minute- lando what are you doing here?!?

user no cause i noticed that too👀

user obsessed with you

user patiently waiting for the lando girlies to realize he followed her immediately after tonights game

user poor lando didnt get the follow back tho😭😭

yourusername

liked by landonorris and 19,382 others

yourusername first ever grand prix!!! such a delight to perform for these lovely faces✨

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user you guys made paying hundreds of dollars for a ticket worth it tbh

user icons

user another lando like, jolene im begging you pls dont take my man😔

user its the other way around for me😩 lando needs to back off my girl

user 🔥

landonorris amazing performance😍

user oh we're getting bold??? user down bad lando is my favorite lando fr user OMGGG FUTURE WAG Y/N??

user STOP is she the reason lando went to that cowboys game a few weeks ago

user going to her games and they're not even dating yet, gotta respect the game tbh😭

user sorry to break girls' hearts but there's videos of her and lando talking at the gp and he was blushing and giving her heart eyes the whole time

user literally came to her account cause of that video HAHAH

landonorris

liked by danielricciardo, maxfewtrell and 930,482 others

landonorris 'murica

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user PASSENGER PRINCESS LANDO???

user ARE THOSE DCC BOOTS IN THE LAST SLIDE???

user it HAS to be the cheerleader he just followed cause they wear the exact same boots ↪user her name is Y/N!! put some respect in our dcc queen's name ↪user yes maam🫡, i apologize for my ignorance as a brit

user lando in a cowboy hat?? SHOW IT TO ME NOW RACHEL

maxfewtrell man you never let me drive when youre in the car

landonorris yeah cause i dont trust u maxfewtrell YOUVE KNOWN ME LONGER THAN Y/N??this comment has been deleted

user did max just confirm it is y/n THEE DCC in the last slide🧍‍♀️

user LMFAOO i know lando gave him an earful after that deleted comment user too late for him to delete, I HAVE IT PRINTED OUT! Y/N AND LANDO CONFIRMED

user streets are saying it's y/n in the last slide... we lost her guys😔

user AND WE LOST HER TO A BRITISH MAN💔💔

user now we wait for y/n to follow him and start soft launching too

danielricciardo glad i trusted the process

landonorris TOLD YOU user i hate when they comment inside jokes, got me feeling left out :(

user wait the way he let her drive even though hes said before he hates not being in control, meaning he already trusts her🥹

user i love her already omg

user lando dating an american cheerleader is actually the most lando thing ever

yourusername

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell and 18,392 others

yourusername current side mission: turning a brit into a texan

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user bae just tag lando norris, we know it's him

user NOO I WAS HOPING IT WAS JUST RUMORS💔

user girl lando does not know who you are ↪user i was talking about y/n ↪user oh sorry, valid reaction tbh

user the matching pictures of her driving and him as the passenger princess on his post omg this is the most perfect soft launch i fear

user i waited for 3 and half years for her and white man did it in one week😩

user her soft launching as if max didnt already confirm it on landos post

yourusername shhh just pretend you didn't see that, cant have my soft launch ruined ↪user sorry maam, whatever you say maam

user lando is so posh but she has him driving dirt bikes and going to rodeos HAHAHHA

user the way he looked just watching a football game was hilarious, i cant even imagine a rodeo

user as a european f1 fan, can someone explain why she's so loved? (IM ASKING IN THE NICEST WAY POSSIBLE I SWEAR)

user LOL she's a cheerleader for the dallas cowboys football team which is a huge deal here! it's pretty hard to join the squad but shes a fifth year veteran (about to retire after this year) and she's known as one of the sweetest and kindest leaders on the squad!! she also met lando at a game!

user does she know she has twitter freaking out with this post?

user not that im complaining but this is the first time i see an f1 couple getting so much love HOW AND WHY??

user well y/n is quite literally america's sweetheart

yourusername

liked by landonorris, pietra.pilao and 23,492 others

yourusername one last christmas show🥹

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user what is dcc without y/n☹️

user gonna miss her so bad

user still looked amazing

user okay but is she still with that nascar driver or whatever cause wowwwww😍

landonorris yes, she is still with the FORMULA ONE DRIVER. ↪user OMG AN OFFICIAL CONFIRMATION???

pietra.pilao be with me please?

landonorris 🤨

landonorris woah woah you didnt say you were gonna post this one??? you look too good???

yourusername what happened to not commenting on each other's post until the hard launch🙂 (but ty ily) landonorris i take that back. (ily more) ↪user theyre losers but i love them your honor

footballplayer 🔥

landonorris yeah nice try🤣

user landos fighting for his life in these comments HAHA

user he fr ruined y/n's soft launch cause he cant handle these commenters hitting on her omfg

user kinda scared to comment, i dont want lando coming for me

user please dont be in love with someone else😩please dont have somebody waiting on you😩

landonorris she is in fact in love with someone else and does in fact have somebody waiting on her (ME) ↪user lando is a loser bf CONFIRMED

landonorris

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 973,492 others

landonorris winter break means football games with my beautiful girl

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user finally the hard launch

user she literally is turning him into a texan GRAHHHH🦅🇺🇸

user *pretends to be shocked*

yourusername ILYYYYYYY

landonorris ❤️

user sad about her retiring dcc but happy we'll be getting so much WAG content

user OMG i didnt even think of this ↪user already imagining the paddock fits😩

user ig i have to accept shes officially taken :(

landonorris yeah. ↪user chill bro aint nobody taking her from you

user bro saw all the thrist comments on her last post and decided to hard launch

maxfewtrell ranch in texas when??

yourusername OMG SOON PLEASE @/LANDONORRIS?? ↪landonorris um idk about that ↪yourusername 🤨 ↪landonorris I MEANT ILL THINK ABOUT IT!! IT SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT IDEA😁🫶

user shes got him on a LEASH

danielricciardo ahh feels like yesterday that you bought tickets for the game AND the flight to have a 5 second interaction with the cute dcc

user damn lando was down bad wth😭 landonorris thank you for making this public information. ↪yourusername hey at least you beat the norizz allegations! eventually...

user as an american, im allowing you to count cota as your home race for bagging this queen

user oh lando norris i underestimated your game

User he gets the y'all pass now

landonorris THANK YALLLLLL

user the americanfication of lando is not something i knew i needed, but i did. thank you miss y/n

yourusername youre welcome, he will be listening to zach bryan and dolly parton in no time🫡

notes: one thing about me is im gonna start getting lazy at the end of every smau i make. LOL. anyway i love american reader if you havent noticed already :)

[doromoni]

Not Over the Papaya | OP81

⊹ ｡•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• ｡ﾟ

Ships : Oscar Piastri x Popstar! Reader , Ex!Lando Norris x Popstar! Reader

Genre : Fluff Smau

A/N : I wrote 2 chapters worth of material today … but imma make y’all wait for tomorrow 🤠👹

Face claim : Jennie Kim

Warnings : Moderate Cursing

Summary : Y/N and Oscar cope with their own breakups by making the Heartbreak Club.

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

< Previous | Part 3 | Next >

*message sent

Notification : You received a message from Oscar

*Incoming Call from Oscar

Pick up or Decline

Pick up

“Hi Osc”

“Hi to you too. You sound so sleepy”

“Yeah, I didn’t get that much sleep on the plane.”

“I told you to limit your coffee intake. I’m not there to stop you , you gremlin control yourself”

“I know I knowww”

“So why’d you wanna call? You should sleep”

“Its just weird that I’ve gotten to see your face practically everyday since last month and now I wont see you for like 2 weeks”

“Well we both work very hectic jobs, so that would be expected. But yeah ~ i’ve gotten used to your presence”

“ Hey Osc… Is it weird to say that I already miss your voice? “

“Only my voice?”

“Well your voice is like Jake Sully y’know.”

“You and your Avatar obsession . And I do not sound like Sam Worthington”

“Who??”

“The guy who voices Jake Sully”

“Ok but how do you know that?? I don’t even know that at the top of my head. I just like Jake cause he’s hot”

“I know that because you forced me to watch blue people run and swim for 10 freaking times!”

“Well you made me watch Cars with you on repeat!”

“You also loved Cars! what do you mean?”

“Ok, I do but that’s besides the point”

“What is your point dweeb?”

“ My point is that I miss you already”

“Well I miss you too”

- Hey Osc, is that Lily? -

“Hey I’ll be back. Lando’s talking to me. Don’t hang up, alright?”

- What? No. We’ve broken up , I’ve told you that -

- I thought I heard a girl’s voice. Is she your new fling? -

- I dont do flings Lando -

- Whatever you say mate -

“Hello? are you still there?”

“Helloooo?”

“You’ve dozed off huh. Sleep well dearest”

Y/N.

liked by oscarpiastri, y/bf, logansargeant, and others

Y/N. Florida I love you but you’re too hot. Rehearsals are brutal! 🤠 send jake sully thirst traps pls

Y/N. Whaaaaa who said that?

oscarpiastri Youre so weird.

Y/N. Because having a crush on a blue car isnt??

logansargeant Its not weird to have a crush on Sally tho

charles_leclerc I support my son’s tastes. Crushing on Sally is valid.

Y/N. But me having a crush on a giant blue man is not???

oscarpiastri nope. thats weird Y/N

logansargeant nope. thats weird Y/N (1)

charles_leclerc nope, thats weird Y/N (2)

Y/N. ugh i h8 the patriarchy

Y/bf Y/N your glowing babeeee!! So excited for Floridaaa. Im catching myself a cowboy 🤠. (and ur Jake Sully crush is so Valid!!)

Y/N Babe give me a call, your pass is still with me! ( RIGHT? The blue man is hot)

Y/bf That he is, but I think orange suits you better 😘 liked by oscarpiastri

oscarpiastri you are so right @Y/bf but its actually papaya 🤓

Y/bf stfu Oscar, im making u a case here 😤

user1 I dont know what to freak out about??!! Y/N adding another day to her concert sched or Oscar being in Y/N’s comment section and CLEARLY being flirty.

user2 Sir that is your teammate’s ex 😮‍💨

user3 Well lando did cheat … so eff the bro code or smth like that— i dunno im not a guy

user4 we can freak out about both!!! YES MY SHIP IS FREAKING FLOATING (it aint sailing till oscar confirms his breakup)

user5 Y/N becoming more unhinged by the second

user6 Y/N looks like she’s becoming better and happier 🤍 we love to see it.

user7 Enjoy your time Queen!

User7 Y/N in American soil is built different

User8 We see that like Oscar 👀.

oscarpiastri 3mins close friends

story replies

charles_leclerc do you like Americans now? well its very plausible since Logan’s American.

oscarpiastri Are you insinuating that I like Americans because of Logan?

charles_leclerc Yes, exactly that.

oscarpiastri NO.

logansargeant I knew it! Western always winssss 🤠🦅

oscarpiastri Why am I not surprised.

Y/N. Ohhhh whos the hot chick? 🤭🫣

oscarpiastri 🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

oscarpiastri I dunno you tell me

Anyone interested to be added to the taglist? Drop a comment or DM me!

Series Taglist : @champagneproblems17 @itsjustfranzi @cheriwritesig @forza-charles @awritingtree @sltwins @gr1mes-cc @hwalllllllelujah @btsfluffsworld @tillyt04 @landotd @booksandflowrs @czennieszn @thatsouthernblondewiththeass @tellybearryyyy @wobblymug @alittlechaotics-blog @bingussthirdtoe @mirrorball-6 @demandealalune @heartsforleclerc @yoongi-holland @maneskin-slave @alenix @forensicheart @bloodyymaryyy @stereading @hahahjej @youre-on-your-ownkid : closed

Maintaglist : @myescapefromthislife @peterholland04 @charlottef1 @fangirl125reader @mel164 @gnarlycore @chloelovesln4 @vickykazuya @merchelsea @ln4author @qzmef @nxk1309 @styl1shl1v @lottalove4evelyn : closed for now

[littlediscoveredstars]

I have a fanfic idea that I haven’t really committed to writing, so you can have it here.

Idea: Batman and Superman decide to finally put the bro-mance to rest and go on a proper date. The thing is, they both plan to reveal their identities at the restaurant.

Bruce focuses so hard on looking like Bruce Wayne, but also more himself that he does at galas. He’s wearing a turtleneck and his comfy work shoes. His hair is less organized and he lets himself slouch.

Clark isn’t sure whether to slick back his hair like Superman but keep the glasses or keep everything Clark Kent but leave the glasses home. He decides to just wing it and go as much like himself as he can: jeans, boots, and glasses. After all, he’s a Kansas farm boy under every layer of identity he’s created.

So, then comes the day for them to meet. They expect to see each other, be a little surprised, then go about their date as normal.

It turned out…not like that.

With neither knowing what name the table was reserved under, they both assume they’ve arrived first and watch every man that fits their date’s general build pass them by.

Clark sees Bruce Wayne and thinks, “Wow! What are the odds Bruce Wayne happens to be at the same restaurant? Funny.” Then he sits down at a booth and waits for Batman.

Bruce, to his credit, watches Clark pass by with suspicions. The guy looks kind of like Superman but those curls are so dense and he honestly cannot imagine Big Blue dressed like a cowboy, so he waves it, especially when the man doesn’t stop to confront him. He just stares the way everyone else has after seeing a celebrity out in public and moves on.

An hour passes. Then two. Both are sitting a few tables apart, looking around desperately for their hero coworker to show.

Bruce gets impatient first. He understand Superman has a lot on his plate and a single free night is a lot to ask. Maybe they’ll try again. Or they won’t, since Bruce has convinced himself this was stupid to begin with.

It’s as he’s preparing to go that he sees that cowboy again. The gorgeous man is looking down, crestfallen at also being stood up.

So, Bruce does something a little spontaneous. Bruce sits in front of the guy. He blames it on the glasses of wine he had while waiting.

Bruce: “I’m Bruce. May I be blunt?”

Clark, blinking in surprise: “uh, sure?”

Bruce: “I watched you walk in over an hour ago and no one has accompanied you. Seeing as my date did the same, I’d like to fill the space.”

Clark, again, surprised he’s even being talked to by a billionaire outside of his job: “Y-yes? Yes! I mean, sure! By all means!”

It’s not like Batman’s going to come crashing in from the window. Well, he could, but Clark’s been listening to the city around them. No sign of Batman’s grapple.

So, Bruce and Clark meet. They fall into conversation easily, even make each other laugh. It’s so effortless and slightly suspicious, but they’re having a fun time and Bruce isn’t self-sabotaging enough to break away now. Not when he’s needed this for a while.

Then, at the end of the date, Clark listens for Batman’s heartbeat. He tries to hear where his friend might be, to understand why he didn’t show, but the heartbeat is standing right in front of him. There, in Bruce Wayne’s chest.

And/or, Clark removed his glasses to clean them and it clicks in Bruce’s mind. He reaches out to smooth all of Clark’s hair back and a single, rebellious curl pops out.

They’re both so furious, Clark has to fly them to the roof to properly shout about it.

[costelloschoice]

Mizu x Cowgirl! reader headcanons -Mizu x fem!reader -hi so I totally don't have a self insert that is a cowgirl and want to share my ideas about this LMAO -but seriously, I love this idea and idc if a cowboy wouldn't be here during this time period. We're here to have fun -comments and reblogs are appreciated :](pls I love readin comments and interacting with yall)

Sfw:

Okay so....wow

You are a completely different life form to Mizu

Your clothes? Crazy.

Your cowgirl hat will be the first thing she would notice, cause what type of that???

Leather pants with chaps on top

damn bro? who dressed you?

Your accent is also strange, why do you talk like that?

Ofc she will see you as a threat at first cause who are you and where did you even come from...plus that revolver in your side holster ain't helping

But once you proved yourself to her you don't mean harm, you're allowed to hang- you would score more brownie points with her

Mizu would def be intrigued by your backstory and why you're here in Japan

Late night talks by the fire

Even sneaking off to show her star gazing and small stories to share about the stars

Play guitar? Show off to her

Sing her songs and little bops you've learned or made on your own

Would die if you wrote one about her

You tame horses like it's nothing and its impressive to her

impressed more in you can ride without a saddle

Your lasso?

See wants to see you use it

has some thoughts of you tying up your enemies while fighting...

Once you guys develop a romantic relationship, she'll be excited but nervous

Excited cause you're great and accept her, but you guys are from two different cultures and lives

Will it work out?

Ofc it will...cause I say so

Will try on your cowgirl hat and do finger guns, even do impressions on you

Hasn't smiled this much in so long, it's like you casted a spell of some sort

Let her ride your horse with her

You have a fun side but also your serious side

Impressed when she sees you FINALLY use a sword like she taught your

speaking of that

she will force you to let her train you to sword fight instead of always relying on that damn revolver

She is impressed you can fight, but just not sword fight

Will hug and praise you in private about it later

"You should've seen yourself...You did so well, so beautiful wielding the sword,"

Will be willing to try your culture's food, even if she doesn't like it, she will appreciate it

When you get mad, and your accent gets thicker...sorry she can't keep up with what you're saying

But!!!

She loves to see you defend her, even if you're really outspoken

Specially with Taigen? Yeah, even though she can fight her own battles

Her favorite line? When you yelled at Akemi for crying too loud during the tea house situation

"Stop cryin' before I give you somethin' to cry about, girl.."

idk she loved see a spoiled girl being put in her place

but she knows you mean well

You were different but a good difference in her life <3

Nsfw:

going back to that damn lasso

wants you to tie her up, she's seen you do it and trusts you fully

would want to learn from you, for sexual and non-sexual reasons

LOVES to ride your strap

and yes

you make her follow the "hat rule"

hates it

but in the moment, she doesn't care too much, and will wear it

when you ride her? You wearin' it

now she sees why you love it

Your accent with dirty talk? Makes her weak in the knees

especially when your whisper in her ear

Your soft yet rough nature makes the sex life 10x better to her

You tell her something one night as a joke

"Save a horse, ride a cowgirl"

and she did

and loved it cause you made sure the ride was rough and wild

making love after star gazing? Yes pls

By the fire? Mhmm

Your soft voice with after care as well? Makes her so giddy and helps put her to sleep fast <3

[coleszzzworld]

Nsfw head canons for miggy 😩🙌🏽.

Warnings- Hate F*cking , overstimulation, praise , breeding 😀 ,cussing , hair pulling , just sum kinky stuff! Read at your own risk ⚠️!

———————————————————————

•when Miguel comes homes from the HQ , and he’s in a bad mood , he’ll just bend you over , doesn’t matter where If your in the kitchen, he’ll bend you over the counter, in the bathroom? , no worries he’ll bend you over the bathroom sink ! , it doesn’t matter like I said., when he needs it , he’ll get it 👀… “Bebé te necesito…”. [baby I need you…]

•he needs a way too release his stress , he has pent up stress and anger from work , he just takes it out on you , while he’s fucking you from the back he’ll grab your hair and pull it , while he’s saying mean things :) , he has no chill , he’ll say the most dehumanizing thing and later on will act like he never said it 😭 , “eres una puta tan buena para mí , t-taking me so good , I love when you let me fuck you when ever I want … your such a good fuck toy perra..” [“your such a good whore for me]. [“bitch”]

•even when he made you cum 4 times , he keeps going, bro has a lot of stamina, and anger ,when it gets too sensitive , you try too stop him or try too crawl away , he’ll just slap your hand away from trying too stop his sloppy thrusts , if you try too crawl away he’ll pull you back down on his cock , then he’ll tease you for not being able too take him . “C-can’t even take me anymore huh? , cmon perra … I know you can take it , just a l-little bit more for me.”

•when Miguel isn’t hate fucking you , he loves praising you , don’t get me wrong he still loves it rough but he takes some time too love your body , and appreciate it , he loves when your on top of him , riding him (save a horse ride a cowboy 🤠) he’ll grab your boob , and the other hand is on your hip as you grind and jump on dat dickkk (sorry I’ll stop 😭) he’ll just praise you on riding him so good , “mi amor , your doing so good riding my cock l-like that , g-god I love you so much …”. [“my love”].

•Ngl this man breeding kink go brrrrrrr , I mean he wants too have kids with you , he thinks you would make such a good mommy , so when you and him are on the verge of cumming , his breeding kink go crazy , while your saying your about too cum , he’ll push your hips down , and speak , “mi amor ,would you like it if I came in you , and made you a mami ?” You moan a yes in a response , “you would be a good mami , baby , you’d take great care of our kids, and I know you’ll be their when I n-need you most” he moan out as he bucks his hips into yours , then finally both of y’all reaching y’all’s highs .

•let’s just say a few weeks past and your pregnant 😀 Miguel might have not showed it , but that man was so fucking happy:)

———————————————————————

A/n ( I know I said I would i make fic , I am but I wanted too get something out real quick , so I made this , 😩🙌🏽 don’t worry miggy fan fic coming soon💅🏽)

[dave-me0wstaine]

PLEASE LMEADE PLEASE!!!!!!! mean dilf dave bro.... dilf dave is too fine for this world.

IM BEGGINF foe him to be the kinkiest bitch on the planet (not too crazy js like size, degration, praise, daddy <maybe>) AND since he's so mature now he knows exactly how to make u feel good. ALSO I SAW A INTERVIEW OF COWBOY DAVE CALLING HIMSELF DADDY AND I CANT STOP THINKING OF IT GOD HELO ME.

OMG SAGE YOUR BRAIN!!!! and first off WHERE TF IS THIS INTERVIEW??? PLS PROVIDE A LINK (for scientific research purposes ofc <33)

secondly i love love LOVE dilf dave simply for these reasons!!! also ik realistically it's unlikely he’d like it but something about calling him daddy.... omg it just does it for me. ESPECIALLY when he's older, i feel like he'd be into it more because it seems more reasonable a title for a man his age, as compared to when he was young. like i feel if you tried to call 80s/early 90s dave “daddy” he'd just kinda laugh it off. but late 90s/early 2000's dave??? oh he's into it.

like i imagine he's already into degradation/praise, etc., but you accidentally unlocked the daddy and size kink for him. maybe you two are going at it, and dave's fucking you so good you're damn near delirious, and the word accidentally slips out. you're so fucked out you don't even realize you said it until he stops in his tracks, only to plunge his cock deep inside you while he leans down to whisper in your ear.

"you like my cock that much, huh, you whore? you like that? calling me daddy?"

after this all hell breaks loose. he insists you call him daddy during sex, usually while you beg him to touch/fuck you. he refers to himself as daddy, saying "daddy loves you, baby" while he's fucking you into oblivion, and whispers praises of how you're such a good girl for him. the size kink follows soon after, as he realizes just how small and submissive you get for him.

also ik im being extra delusional but i'd like to think that at some point he’d start occasionally referring to himself as "daddy" outside the bedroom. like you're trying (and failing) to get something off of a high shelf and he's brushing behind you, saying in a soft voice "daddy's got it, baby."

oh dear lord i just love dave with a daddy kink

[shieldofiron]

Vibe Check Part 16

Who you Bro not What you Bro

Also on Ao3 here and tumblr here

“And what are your goals?”

Steve sighs, hanging his head. “To show Billy that I’m cool- we can’t do this, Robs, he’ll see right through it.”

“No, he won’t. You were bi this whole time and neither of you had the slightest clue. I think he isn’t gonna notice a little slight subterfuge.” Robin leans over, reachs into the backseat and pulls out the stupid white rhinestone cowboy hat and plops it onto his head. “Now, what are your goals, cowboy?”

He closes his eyes. “To show Billy that I’m cool with being touched and it’s no big deal.”

“And?”

“And that I’m just as hot as Jason so he better snap me up while he can.”

“Right. If not hotter. And how do we accomplish that?”

“I’m gonna flirt with him, and with Jason, and with strangers. Maybe kiss someone,” He nods, steeling himself. “Just another night out with the boys. But. Flirty. Oh god.” Steve covered his face with his hands.

“And my goals are to watch your boy like a hawk and see how he reacts.” She reaches back and puts his hat’s twin on her head, checking herself quickly in the mirror. “Stop thinking about the play wrestling. It was fine.”

“I was a mega creep.”

“Why do you always make it sound like a violation of the Geneva convention? It sounded like regular frat guy behavior. I’ve seen you all with your ball taps and bro hugs. If anything it probably gave friend zone vibes. I’ll watch, if he seems actually creeped out I’ll do the signal.” She brushes the brim of her hat.

“Okay. You really think it’s fine?”

“You didn’t like ravish his body or something.” She shrugs. “I mean I’m overthinker number one but I really don’t think it was bad.”

“When it comes time to actually do that I may totally freak out.” Steve mumbles. “I mean if Billy… if we ever… yeah.”

“Just breathe. All you have to do tonight is be your charming self.” She opens her door. “We can also just leave if you need to.”

Steve nods, “Right. Yes. Ok. I’m doing it.”

He follows her out of the car into the chilly night are. A row of scrubby hedges have been planted around the small lot, as if shielding the Cottonmouth from the neighborhood. It’s a squat building with faded barn red paint and a proud neon sign featuring a large snake’s head.

The handful of motorcycles out front might have it mistaken for a biker bar, but inside it’s pretty clear that it isn’t. The older woman who stamps their hands has a harness on over her muscle tee, and she has a tattoo of a pinup girl that Steve struggles not to stare at.

Inside there’s a more than moderate crowd, mostly men. For a split second Steve panics that they have the wrong place. Everyone here just seems so much older.

But then he spies Jason Carver waving them over to the bar, where there’s a cluster of people he vaguely recognizes from around campus. Even the bartender doesn’t look quite old enough to be serving drinks.

Steve is so relieved to see them, he doesn’t even register that Billy is talking to someone, a slim brunette guy with a tattoo crawling out of his tight v-neck shirt.

Steve throws himself into Billy’s arms. “Thank fuck you’re here. I thought we fully had the wrong place.”

Billy pats his back. “Hey, Stevie. This is Connor.”

Steve pulls back, glancing over at the guy. He looks vaguely familiar, but not quite enough for Steve to be able to say for sure.

“Hey, man.” Steve pulls away from Billy and offers his hand. “Nice to meet you. I’m Steve.”

Connor eyes Steve’s hand disdainfully. “Yeah thanks, bro. Connor.”

Steve frowns and catches Jason rolling his eyes.

“Hi. I’m Robin.” Robin cuts in between them, pushed by the crowd in front of Steve closely.

Connor glances between them. “Nice hats.”

“Thanks.” Steve tips his.

“We got them for Steve’s first experience out at a gay bar.” Robin says weirdly loudly.

Connor furrows his very neat eyebrows, his eyes still darting between them.

“Speaking of.” Jason shoves a drink into Steve’s hand. “Let’s dance. I wanna get lit tonight.”

Steve shrugs, smiling helplessly at Billy and Connor. “Nice to meet you, Dude.”

“Ugh, ignore him. He’s such an asshole.” Carver grumbles, barely loud enough to be heard over Beyoncé’s belting.

“Who?” Steve glances back. Robin hasn’t followed, preferring to get cozy between Billy and Connor at the bar.

“Connor. He’s a pretentious little thing,” Jason says with a sour scoff, pulling Steve out onto the floor and draping Steve’s arm over his shoulder.

Steve’s brain is too confused by everything to take that in for a moment, pinging between Jason’s motions and the heat fron the sea of strangers around them.

He’s doing it, he’s at a gay bar with people who know. He’s dancing when he’s not even drunk enough and men are looking at him and he likes it.

And it’s fucking terrifiying. He glances back at Billy nervously and Billy throws him a wide smile.

“Are they…?” Steve asks way too late, when Jason’s words finally settle in his brain.

Carver snorts. “I fucking hope not. But I also assume not because Billy talks a big game, but he doesn’t seem interested in anyone.”

That’s because he’s too interested in you, Steve thinks as Jason looks down, swirling his hips.

“So… your boyfriend is away?” Steve hates and loves the level of the music. It feels just low enough that they aren’t yelling, but way too quiet for it to feel private.

“Oh yeah, he has a whole thing with his family.”

“Are you going home for break?” Steve shrugs. “My parents scheduled a cruise so I’ll be here the whole time.”

“Nah, I’ll be here. my mom planned a whole like Church trip thing, but I told her I didn’t want to do it, and we got in a whole fight.” Jason rolls his eyes.

“That sucks.”

“No, it’s fine. Plus I’m taking two classes-” Jason starts.

“Hey.” Billy puts his arm over Steve’s shoulder, sending a elecro-shock heat over Steve’s whole body.

“Hey there, sore loser.” Jason says with a giggle.

Billy cackles, the sound pounding in Steve’s bones as deeply as the bass line. Steve’s phone goes off in his pocket several times but he ignores it. He’s frozen with jealousy, staring at Carver.

“You lookin’ for a rematch, Carver?” Billy asks.

“Sure. Who’s gonna stand in for you?” Jason shoots back.

“What the fuck are you guys talking about?” Steve asks.

“Oh.” Jason rolls his eyes. “I have my picture on the wall for the record for staying on the bull, and Hargrove tried to beat me.”

Steve almost gasps “when” like a jealous girlfriend in a soap opera, but he guesses it doesn’t matter. The jealousy is the same either way.

“How long is your record?” Steve asks.

“A minute and four seconds.”

“Holy shit, Dude. You were on the bull for a minute?” Steve gapes at him.

Jason smiles smugly. “What can I say. I can ride. Hey, Hargrove, maybe the two of you could beat me together. You know. With the power of friendship.”

Billy tugs Steve just a little closer. “Please, of course we could.”

“No fucking way-” Steve gasps it way too breathlessly because Billy’s body grazes his and seemingly reawakens every nerve in his skin at once.

“You’re both going to eat it so hard,” Jason grins.

“Yeah. Yes we will, Billy can last like ten seconds,” Steve shakes his head.

“Excuse me, you don’t know about my moves.” Billy scoffs.

“Well, I can do better than that at least,” Someone says behind them. “What do you say, Billy?”

Jason shifts, pulling Connor into Steve’s like of vision hard by his elbow.”

“Yeah, we can do better, you’re so on, Hargrove.” Jason says quickly.

Connor scowls and opens his mouth again but Carver all but drags him towards the bull.

Steve’s phone is going off like crazy and he fumbles with is, shoving it back in his pocket when he sees that its Robin calling.

“Who’s that?” Billy asks.

Steve can’t even look at Billy, he’s much too nervous. He downs his drink in one go instead, letting the vodka burn.

“I’m not drunk enough, yet.” He says to Billy.

Billy hoots, steering them dowards the bull. “Well, I am. Want another, Pretty Boy?”

Steve doesn’t know what’s going on or how to feel about it. He twists in Billy’s grip and practically melts with relief when he sees Robin approaching.

“What’s going on?”

“We’re riding the bull? I guess?” He says.

She looks positively horrified. “Are you serious?”

“Fuck yeah we are!” Billy tugs Steve closer and he’s distracted from how close they are by the tug of Billy’s warmth. He’s wearing those tight jeans and a stupid white undershirt you can see his nipples through, and he’s so warm, and it’s driving Steve mad.

“For what dark purpose? Remind me?” Steve asks, his voice tight with arousal and nerves.

“We have to crush Carver’s record.”

“What happened to a nice dance? What happened to drinks?” Steve scoffs.

“What happened to hello? How are you? My name is bullridin’ Billy.” Billy replies with a giggle.

Steve makes a nervous squeak of a noise. “I’m about to fall on my face, man.”

“I won’t let anything happen to your pretty face,” Billy pouts. “You know that.”

“This is so not how I pictured our first threesome.” Steve mutters.

Billy trips just a little and so does Steve. That was more like something he would say before all this, when they were just buddies. Is it too weird now?

But Billy’s cut off from whatever he would have replied because one of the bartenders gets up on the side of where the bull is penned with a microphone.

“We have a challenge to our current reigning Bull Champion! Who’s ready to ride with Baby Jay again?” The crowd cheers, a few older guys leering at Carver. “ And his partner Connor? Connor, right?”

Steve looks at an older hairy guy who’s saying something to Jason. “Um, how old is this boyfriend?”

“He’s in a frat, thank god.” Billy whispers into Steve’s ear.

There are several cheers from all around. Steve feels frankly a little sick looking at the bull which is lit in neon greens and blues by the Christmas lights strung through the wood rafters of the bar.

“It’ll be fun,” Billy says, like he can read Steve’s mind. Steve can smell the alcohol on his breath and he wishes he was a little drunker. Or a lot drunker.

Jason whispers something to the bartender and then climbs up onto the bull behind a surly looking Connor. The bartender hops down and steps over to the controls.

Steve only has a second to recognize that Jason doesn’t hold onto Connor before it begins and Connor goes flying almost immediately, flopping onto the mats with a yelp.

Jason looks like he’s smiling, but it’s hard to tell as the bull bucks faster and faster.

And then Carver falls too, luckily far away from Connor into the corner of the mats.

“That can’t have been that long, we could beat that,” Steve laughs.

“Thirty two seconds tonight, not his best.” The bartender announces. “Can uhhh Steve and Bobby beat it?”

Billy chuckles. “I knew you’d be in.”

They both rush to the mats, getting a pat on the back from Carver and a scowl from Connor.

Steve can’t hear the bartender. He can’t hear the music. They climb up onto the bull, and Steve can’t quite figure out where Jason put his hands to hold on so he wraps his hands around Billy’s waist.

It feels far too slow, but it’s hard to understand what’s happening when he clings close to Billy and gets a whiff of Billy’s cigarette-y musk. He catches a glimpse of Robin filming, her mouth open.

Billy’s ass is fitted right next to Steve’s dick, and they’re rocking slow and steady into each other. And the overwhelm of the evening crashes down on him.

The room spins around them and Steve holds on to Billy tightly, his heart in his throat. What are they even doing here when Steve wants to be at home under the covers with Billy watching a movie, rather than trying to figure out out if he’s flirting right or not. Where was the gay club for that?

He suddenly hates the game of it all. He rests his forehead on Billy’s neck. His hat topples off his head into nowhere and before he knows it they are too, landing on the mats in a tangle of limbs.

“Your champions, at thirty eight seconds! Not record beating, but certainly enough for tonight. And isn’t that what we’re all looking for?” The bartender asks right as ‘Here You Come Again,’ by Dolly Parton starts up.

Steve shoves himself upright in Billy’s lap and someone shoves an instant camera in their faces. Steve is scared to know what his face looks like when the flash does off, because he can’t peel his eyes off Billy’s red, laughing face.

Steve’s phone is going off again and his head is still swimming.

“Never let me do that again.” Steve says.

Billy just laughs more, grabbing Steve’s half-crushed cowboy hat and propping it up on his own head.

“Two more drinks, you’ll be climbing up there with Robin.” Billy replies, and his voice feels soft and low and terrific.

Steve wants to kiss him again. He wants to ask why the fuck he’s so hung up on Jason Carver or fucking Connor when Steve feels like he couldn’t be more obvious.

“Can we just dance now?” Steve asks instead, because he’s not sure he can handle the answer. And he doesn’t know if he’s ever wanted anything as much as he wants to dance like all of this doesn’t matter to him.

“Hell yeah, anything the champion wants.”

It’s small just a tiny twitch of Billy’s lip, but they’re so close Steve can see Billy’s every expression.

Before he has a chance to decipher it, Billy’s plucking him up and leading him off the platform into the crowd.

[tomorrowusa]

« Fellas, we gotta talk. A lot of men seem to think that Donald Trump is some kind of tough guy.

He's not.

I mean, look at him, he wears more makeup than Dolly Parton. He whines like a baby. The guy's afraid of birds.

Donald Trump had his daddy pay a doctor to say his widdle feet hurt so he could dodge the draft.

Look at that gut! It's like a garbage bag full of buttermilk.

He sells imaginary baseball cards pretending to be a cowboy-fireman. He’s barely strong enough to hold an umbrella.

Will ya look how he drinks water — like a little pink chickadee.

He’s got jugs. Big ones. Like Dolly Parton.

He cheats at golf, and creeps around beauty pageant dressing rooms.

And you know that little dance he does? He looks like he’s jacking off a pair of giraffes.

He’s moody. He pouts. He throws tantrums. He acts like a 5-year-old behind the wheels of a truck.

He bends over for Putin. He's cattier on social media than a middle school mean girl.

The guy needs help walking downhill. 'Almost there, grandma!'

This November, let’s stop kidding ourselves. Donald Trump is afraid — of rain, of dogs, of windmills, of Meryl fucking Streep, and being laughed at.

And mostly, he’s terrified that real, red-blooded American men will find out that he’s a weak, tubby toddler. What's wrong, tough guy? Did someone grab you by the pussy?

…whiny little bitch. »

— Actor and former pro wrestler Dave Bautista on Jimmy Kimmel Live. That is a world class burn. 🏆🔥

Here's the entire opening segment including Jimmy Kimmel's comments and comedy. Dave Bautista appears towards the end.

This is just the last few minutes – with all of Dave Bautista's clip.

^^^ EDIT: HEADS UP! The clip from Jimmy Kimmel which includes only Dave Bautista after a short introduction was removed for copyright reasons by YouTube. However, you can go directly there in the official video by clicking here to save time.

It's difficult to imagine why anybody would consider Trump to be a "tough guy". Such people are either total idiots or as easily duped as those who attended Trump University, took Trump Vitamins, or bought Trump Bibles (printed in China).

If you know any "bro" types who like Trump, send them the clip.

NOTE: I couldn't find a complete transcription of Dave Bautista's remarks, so I did it myself. Hope there aren't any errors. I did NOT include bits spoken by Trump or by Jimmy Kimmel during that piece.

[1-siracha]

my first-ish impression of the obey me characters- part 1 (older brothers)

I haven't played the game yet because i forgot my password to download stuff, so i only know obey me information from tumblr and wiki.

i think this ended up with me being a hater sorry to anyone whos likes these guys

---------------------------------------

Lucifer

based on his character design half of the community probably calls him daddy

bro is mad ugly but i cant say shit because my haircut looks similar to that

i personally think the rope thing on his waist is massively hideous

i would strangle him with that i mean nothing

hes probably a massive asshole but everyone excuses it because he's hot (he's not i think you guys are blind)

i think i heard he tries to kill mc and idk man thats pretty fucked up ngl

like I DONT CARE IF YOURE TRAUMATISED STOP BEATING OUR ASS 💀

he is NOT a certified g

he looks like he beats up and abuses people and i do NOT stand for that

oh wait yeah he does that to mammon 💀

he also has a punchable face so

he probably looks at babies to make them cry

3/10 (3 points because im preparing ms for even worse characters)

---------------------------------------

Mammon

ok what in the cowboy fuck is that

i dont like his fit that shit is nasty

what is that feathery thing on his waist?? a feather duster????

NOTHING MATCHES.

i just hate this fit so much

however

he is a certified g 💪🔥

my respects to bro

like he was actually nice to us?? and he actually cared about us?? and not tried to kill us?? damn thas crazy

also i feel sorta bad for him cuz he keeps getting shitted on by his brothers

hes dumber than a rock tho. like a trumpet- incredibly dense yet somehow the head is completely air. also loud as fuck and annoying sort of

hes ok but i just think he needs to stop getting his clothes from dollar tree

7/10

---------------------------------------

Leviathan

OH MYG OD

LMOFOFOAOAFIASOFOOAF

BLUE HAIR AND PRONOUNS????????????? 😭😭😭😭😭😭

LIBERAL JUSTIN BEIBER LOOKIN ASS

once again the fit is disturbing me

why does his shirt randomly have a blue triangle??

tf is that collar thing?? why positioned straighter than the males in my school??

i feel like the jacket should be shorter

the runners?? who tf does bro think he is?? usane bolt??

colour scheme is sort of disorganised in my opin onion

only terrible people (me) wear headphones around their neck so uh red flag

PERSONALITY WISE.

im sorry but he sounds annoying as fuck i would clock him in the face

i cannot handle the 'i-i-i--i-i-i-i-im a gross otaku!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🤧' shit. he sounds like a pick me girl but with absolutely no confidence

there are 3 types of shy- terrorist, annoying, and genuinely nice

he's the annoying one.

BUT i feel like i would play splatoon with him and he would be pretty good at it so

4/10

[the-final-high-noon-rings]

something something names in hnoc

i'm not very good at articulating exactly my thoughts but here are some things ive noticed about names and what they mean in high noon over camelot

• obviously mordred choosing his name as such. beyond the 🏳️‍⚧️yippee transgender cowboy🏳️‍⚧️, it also stops arthur from recognizing his son, and also seems to represent how his choosing of his name is similar to how he chooses peace (?) it's also the way that its said. he "grew up into a fine young man who chose his name as mordred" something about choosing a name and power?

• mordred's birth mom not actually having a name in hnoc canon. we get his adoptive mother's name in fiction, and we can guess his birth mother's name based off aruthurian legend, but we don't actually know . we hear neither in the actual story, due to them not being relevant or their self-determination not changing the outcome. im a bit hesitant to say that it just didn't come up given how names seem to flow freely in the other albums is when describing other planets in ouatis

• speaking of the saxons, none of them have names except mordred's mother. they're just known as chieftains, or the one "who drew her knife to save him". this might just be a result of the way westerns in general treat indigenous americans, which is a whole other sack of worms, but i thought it would be worth mentioning

• the pendragons and how much they say their names. they introduce themselves in the first song they're in, and in blood and whiskey they address each other by name repeatedly

• brian only being known as the hanged man. this seems to reduce the trust between him and gawain/arthur, and also takes away his agency in a way? he is stuck there, with only his advice to give, but as the hanged man and not brian, he can't do much (taking away a name ->taking away power/action in the story??)

• in the hanged man rusts, brian addresses gawain as his name and arthur as "arthur, my sheriff" in the first few words. meanwhile galahad isn't named until the second bit of brian's prophecy. he seems to care more about others than himself, about saving others, so that might be why brian goes to how the problem can be fixed rather than saying "hey galahad my dude my bro that i probably kiss you wanna go into the bowels of the station"

again, i don't know how well i articulated this, and i don't know what it means overall thematically, but names and not having names seem to feature a lot in this album

[unleashed111]

Ok for the ‘ask me about a character’ thing how about

Arthur Morgan

How I feel about the character:

I LOVE ARTHUR. My bro is so conflicted and has so much softness and depth to him. He’s a big tough cowboy because he needs to be but y’all know if he didn’t have to be he would be a soft boy who loves nature and horses.

All the people I ship romantically with him: Charles. I mean there are others I could see but I like Charles. He just matches Arthur’s softer side so well. He brings out the best in him and doesn’t let him get away with any shit.

Non romantic otp:

Arthur and Sadie have an interesting relationship that I think should not be romantic thought I won’t stop you if you do ship them. They are just too similar and too different. A lot of angry and violence. Though I also love to see Arthur interact with all the characters. Arthur and hosea are perfect father and son. I adore them so much.

Unpopular opinion:

I feel like I already said it really with not seeing Arthur and Sadie being a good paring. Again that’s just personal.

One thing I wish had happened to this character in canon:

He didn’t fucking die??? Just kidding, it’s an important part to his character but I wish that the high honor money ending didn’t exist? It doesn’t make that much sense to try and be a good person and go back anyways for the money??? Honestly the money ending barely makes sense any way you spin it. Arthur is dying what the fuck would he do with the money anyways.

Anyways thanks for the ask. I promise I’ll actually do these things(maybe)

[elfhunk]

i really didn't like barbara (2023) but i think the thing making me feel most bonkers is the idea that ken goes outside like this in public:

and all he can remark upon is how respected, cool, and powerful he feels. how everyone likes him, and respects him, and it's nothing at all like how people look at him in barbieland. that he feels, specifically, no violent intentions towards him, while barbie is grappling with the concept of the male gaze for the first time.

and this was a problem for me, and it haunted me for the rest of the movie. because do you know what it actually feels like to be man dressed in public like this? to put on your funny little cowboy outfit and romp around with your gal pal?

you're not nodding to a bro finishing his set at the gym. you're not getting fist bumps and handshakes from random men on the street. you are getting called slurs.

you are getting literally nothing but barely contained homophobic contempt from men who immediately clock you as a gross, weird, queer freak. this is a one way ticket to being called the gay slur of the day, and the movie just sort of hopes you forget homophobia exists and how men enact homophobia onto each other constantly.

i don't know how this happened, but it remains a glaring issue for the rest of the movie. the ken characters dressing in sexual, hyper-masculine archetypes of cowboys and every imaginable type of jock is supposed to be a joke about guys being dudes and how ken dolls used to dress but it just... loops back around to feeling pointedly homophobic, when these are aesthetics that have been 100% adopted by gay men?

like, any salient conversation about the patriarchy doesn't function when your toxic alpha males are dressed to go to a circuit party. this is what i wore to pride.

as a man who does dress like this pretty often, and loves to go to the gym dressed like this to work out and feel sexy and confident... it felt really bad? and really mean for no reason? like, these are aesthetics that gay men adopted because we like being men, and we like playing these male archetypes to such campy extremes precisely because straight men stop finding it appealing and it lets us enjoy all of the fun parts of male identity we didn't get to enjoy when male spaces were toxic cesspools of homophobia that pushed us out.

i accept the possibility that i am being dramatic, but i think it is an issue for me that barbara (2023) thinks its funny and absurd for men to dress like this, and plays the visual of it it so often for comedy while the boys wrestle and grab and tease each other that it begins to make me feel really unwelcome.

making fun of guys being dudes so much that you accidentally become homophobic is not new! and i always hate it! but in this instance, it did really did make me, a doll collector and barbie fan who is also a gay man? a gay man who really loves and has a deep affinity for the idea of being a wonderful supportive ken to all of the wonderful barbies in my life? who also dresses in slutty little neon gym shorts sometimes because it makes him feel confident and sexy in a form of masculinity that has been queered into something empowering?

it made me feel really gross. i did not like it at all.

also i hated allan.

[theinstagrahame]

Orbital Blues Mixtape

Been waiting to do these, because I have physical props for them!

These are three adventures I've made for Orbital Blues.

They're all available on my Itch page, or in hard copies from the SoulMuppet web store. So if you're in the market for an RPG about sad space cowboys, and you want to get the core book as well as a bunch of read adventures, they would be my recommendation!

Here's a bit about each of the adventures...

Electric Sheep Shuffle

The big plot twist in this, honestly, came to me in a dream. I had about half of the plot in my head when I woke up, so I just built a space station around it.

What I wound up exploring with this one was 'what would Artificial Intelligence look like in the Orbital Blues universe?' I don't think this is *the definitive* answer, but it's a fun answer that I'm proud of.

The bulk of the book goes into the locations and people of a space rest stop, Brequin Station. I included a bunch of facilities you might find at a middle-of-nowhere rest stop in space, like repairs, food, communications, and socialization (i.e., a bar). Of course, that would be kind of a flat space without some people who actually inhabit it.

So I made my first foray into creating a population. I think there are a dozen or so people in total who live at and make the station work, and each of them have small goals or drives of their own (including a station-board romance subplot).

Jumpgate Charade

Like the previous adventure, I wanted to explore what something looked like in the Orbital Blues universe. Unlike ESS, this one didn't come to me in a dream. It came to me when my partner and I were on a Cary Grant kick and watched the film Charade.

Honestly, it was a fun watch (a little 'of its time' in some ways), but the twists kinda surprised me. Because RPGs in general are my permanent hyperfixation, I started noodling on a way to write the plot down for an adventure. And again, the OB setting just felt right--plus the writing, layout, and adventure design for my previous one had just been so much *fun*.

And that's how we wound up with Jumpgate Charade.

----

I'll take a second to note the pronouns, because it was a semi-conscious decision in the first one that became intentional by this point in these and another adventure I wrote: I want my worlds to be full of queer representation, in the same way I want my life to be full of queer people as well. Using a mixture of pronouns (regular and neo type), helps flag that.

But, I think there's a very worthwhile practical consideration here: If you've got a lot of people in an adventure, you're going to have a lot of pronouns flying around. Binary pronouns in a large group, you're going to get a lot of confusion pretty quickly, especially when everyone's keeping these people in a Theatre of the Mind state. Y'know, like:

"Do you mean 'Him' the bartender or 'him' the guy with a sword?"

"No, 'him' the guy playing music."

Mixing in neo-pronouns and other non-binary markers just gives the GMs another way to mark who's doing what in a scene with multiple people.

----

Station-bound Semitones

This one wound up being a beast, because I gave myself a really hefty design task with it. Something made me think about the Runaway 5 (aka Runaway Bros) from Earthbound (SNES). So, again I asked myself, what if they were in the Orbital Blues-niverse?

Apparently, they would have to go to 8 different space stations and get into minor catastrophes that the players would have to help them break out of. Just like the band in the SNES game.

Which also meant I had to write 8 stations and 8 mini-scenarios for the band to get through. (I'd also probably need a tour poster and some back discography, but those came out of a fun day on Canva.)

I recycled 2 of these stations from the previous adventures, with a few notes about what might be different if players had already done the other two adventures. So that saved me some time, but I still had to make a bunch of content to fill these out.

They had to be unique places, that also felt lived in like the two I already had. The adventures couldn't all be the same, because they don't all feel the same in the original.

My personal favorites are the Scooby Doo-esque Haunted Station mystery, and the Street Team mission where you have to go and round up a crowd for the (at this point probably quite delayed) concert. There are fights, there are corporate overlords and criminal contacts, but those two really feel like the most fun to me because they're a little bit the least Cowboy Bebop of the batch--and breaking things up was sorta the point of this.

It wound up being about twice the size of the other two adventures... so it also winds up being a little pricier. Also the first time I had to make a spine for a book. It's a thicc boi.

(Full disclosure, I've got an affiliate link for SoulMuppet, which is the link I'm putting above. I get support either way, and they've been a delight to work with, so support us both at the same time, if you're so inclined!)

[malottie]

1, 6, 12, 39

get asked things, dork (affectionate

welp, get your reading glasses out everyone

1: 3 things that shaped me into who i am

-1: luck. from the classic things like being born in a wealthy western country, being white (not inherently lucky but made me privileged/safer), having a relatively nice familly with no financial struggle, etc, to smaller stuff. like, it's a miracle i was never bullied in school. if it wasn't for that one person, maybe i would've died. i had free access to the internet since i was like 9, and somehow never stumbled on stuff that was inapropriate for my age

i consider myself quite lucky, despite all the hardships

-2: being trans. sorry to the people who think it's cringe when we make it our whole personnality, but it is litteraly so important. so central. i cannot fathom what i would be like if i weren't trans. that's just not the same person

-3: having weird ass parents. by that i mean that they're almost not like parents, more like... people i lived with that cared for me? i of course mean that in the sense that i don't have any special emotional attachment to them and all, but also that it doesn't feel like they raised me because they transmitted so little to me. my way of seeing the world, my hobbies, my fears, my political opinions, my general knowledge, my understanding of myself and others, my skills, i got them from, well, not them. the internet school, my friends, but not my parents. truly, i don't really know these people

6: best and worst part of being online

i've been here most of my life, so all the bad is just part of it. yes, that's where all the haters are. sure, all of the horrible things in existence can be found here. but that's also where my friends are. that's where community is. that's my only way of accessing at least 50% of what makes me happy. it has taught me so much about the world and myself, has held so many fulfilling experiences for me

if i had to choose 1 worst, i'd say transmisoginy i guess? i dunno, girl, i'm not even popular enough to get hate mail

12: a piece of advice i'd like to give

like i said in a previous post of mine i'm just 18. i'm like a baby. i feel like the least qualified person on earth to be giving advice. but i'll say one thing: advices are kinda bullshit. in essence they're opinions you think will be helpfull to someone else. but in my experience, they rarely are, especially when talking about life choices, mental health and the such. i watched hundreds of hours of self help videos, listened to people, went to therapy, and i felt like a fucking moron. i knew all the things, i had the advice, but it wasn't working. in the end, what helped me crawl out of the pit is time, love, and a bunch of stuff i'll never know about. find what works for you and ditch what doesn't; it's not because a piece of advice is true that it is helpful. searching for your solution will probably work better than just trying to apply the solutions others found

39: a youtuber i'm obssessed with

hard and specific

brennan lee mulligan? absolutely obssessed. a youtuber? not really

thegreatreview (he's french)? amazing youtuber. so fucking talented. obssessed? not really

dougdoug? obssessed by his entire cinematic universe for a while now. a youtuber? maybe 50%? it's all twitch streams highlights

john and hank green? ok i'll stop there

let's settle for brian david gilbert then, the man so nice they named him thrice. please buy his bed.

most well known for his Unravelled series on Polygon's channel, like the one about the sonic bible or the one about the smash bros osha violations, his personnal stuff is simply perfect, sometimes whimsical, like "i wish that i could wear hats" or "Pumpkin Cowboy", sometimes horrifying, like the one about the american healthcare system or "Teaching Jake about the Camcorder, Jan '97", often a mix of both, like "we like watching birds" or "earn $20K EACH MONTH by being your own boss". his comedic genius is at its best when it is also at its weirdest. he's also the guy who made the sibling dance song, i guess

[hiding-under-the-willow]

I have so much to say to you.

First, THANK YOU FOR ACKNOWLEDGING ED EDGAR. I feel like people forget he exists, meanwhile I still think about if his son is 90% off.

Two, you've given me Bim x Ed brainrot and I don't know if I want to fight you or hug you.

THREE, your art style is amazing and I eat it up every time

I have so much more I want to say, but I'll leave it at that for now XD

-@wilfywarfy

A) literally so true I mean he was sparsely acknowledge even back in the day in the fandom but it's even worse now and he's got so much comedy potential i don't get it. I think one of the first posts I saw upon getting back into the fandom a few months ago was something along the lines of like " 'Mark needs a cowboy ego' does Ed Edgar mean nothing to you?" And all of the reblogs were people being like "yeah exactly he means nothing to me" and it definitely did something to my brain bc I just have not stopped rotating him in my mind ever since

B) LMAO I GOT ANOTHER ONE BOYS. I love that this keeps happening it was not my original intention but it is really funny

C) Bro thank you I really appreciate it <3333

[spilledcrabs]

Hello I'm now going to gush and cry and sob over RDR2 there will be heavy spoilers so if you don't want them move along thanks

UGGHHHHHH I HATE THE FACT I CAN'T SAVE ARTHUR. I CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. I I I I I FUCKING REFUSE TO SMOKE ANYTHING IN MY PLAYTHROUGHS BC I JUST WANNA PROTECT HIM BRO. THIS GAME HURTS SO BAD MAN I'M SO ATTACHED TO ARTHUR HELP ME 😭😭😭

I don't care if it's just a game Arthur means so much to me and I can't help but wanna protect and care for him. Keep his little cowboy ass fed and happy and out of trouble.

Greatest joy is just seeing how my fave cowboy interacts with people and stuff

This game is having such an impact on my miserable little life it's like OUUUGHHH ARTHUR I DON'T WANT YOU MISERABLE LIKE ME PLEASE

And the way Arthur shit talks himself about being old and an ugly bastard makes me SCREAM AT THE SCREEN. Like stop it you are GORGEOUS. You are HANDSOME.

Can't stand to see him miserable bro, overwhelming urge to just grab him and hug him and like

Love him and change his fate :(

Dying of tuberculosis is such a sucker punch to the gut, and I can't ever get over the fact there isn't one little way to just,,,

Change his death. Keep him alive.

I'm gonna keep a save file before Guarma, before all the TB happens, so I can have a little piece of him left. I can't bring myself to make him suffer twice over with a save file AFTER Guarma

Blissfully oblivious

Also I'm gonna leave so much money for John when I finish the game.. Love him too, the poor bastard

Anyways rant over I'm gonna go lament