#SO I CAN GET ARRESTED BY THIS
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ive been watching skip intro and now I have this banger of a portion of a song stuck in my head forever
youtube
#skip intro#the rookie#nathan fillion#ARREST ME BUT MAKE IT SEXY#SELL ME SOME METH PLEASE#SO I CAN GET ARRESTED BY THIS#DADDY OF A COP WITH HIS DADDY COP WALK AND HIS DADDY COP ARMS AND HIS DADDY COP BUTT#pleASE#i might just make cop rick art to this i dont know#ACAB#1312#copaganda#i might team up with my friend to make an extended version#Youtube
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Saw the sonic 3 trailer are you telling me the movie based on Sonic Adventure 2 is Not anti-military??? No anti-authority theming here?? Nothing?? The game where a kid gets gunned down? Where Shadow’s grief and hate for humanity is BECAUSE of the military?? Where Sonic runs from the cops and is consistently annoyed at their existence?
#sonic 3 spoilers#sonic 3 trailer#Sonic 3 trailer spoilers#I’m. just confused.#I don’t understand#WHERES AMY N ROUGE AS WELL bad day for women Jesus Christ#YOU COULD SO EASILY FIT THEM IN THE MOVIE THO. LIKE YOU CAN EASILY PUT THEIR NARRATIVES IN THERE TO COINCIDE WITH SONIC N SHADOW’S#the GAME DID IT. WHATS YOUR EXCUSE#we’re not gonna see Sonic get arrested. are we gonna see the fucked up prison cell of Gerald. probably not#I have Thoughts okay#I ramble
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having svsss au ideas beyond my station
thinking. shang qinghua goes on a mission as a young disciple to some town in fuckoff nowhere and finds himself in the qiu household. and there he finds a young shen jiu, undergoing the plot he originally intended for him and hadn't realised had become real and he's so young oh god hes so young why is he so small what do you mean that part was real, he hadn't kept it why is it real—
and he panics and sneaks him the Fuck out of that house
and he's not sure what to do but surely sending him to cang qiong will fuck up something in the plot and he can't come under even more investigation and cang qiong tryouts dont happen for months anyway and his system would probably never allow it (it doesnt. it would interfere with yue qingyuans story) but shen jiu is refusing to stay anywhere near this place and wants to learn cultivating to protect himself make sure nothing like this ever happens again and sqh panics harder and
calls mobei jun.
okay. on second thought, maybe this was a bad idea. but he stumbles over himself and shushes baby shen jiu's very understandable freaking out and asks his king for the first thing hes ever asked for other than his own life.
is there any way this human child could learn cultivation in the demon world?
#svsss#shang qinghua#shen jiu#listen. i. okay. listen#first off. i need shang qinghua to just fucking spitball a lesson plan idea thats never even been heard of before in like 5 seconds flat and#absolutely floor mobei jun#i need this to turn partially into shen jiu freaking out over the courting hits and inadvertedly teach mobei jun about human culture#idk. they go to a brothel together#mbj is being dragged along by like a 10 year old visibly shrinking into his coat but imperiously demanding the most expensive courtesan that#fits into their budget so she can spend an hour informing this idiot that no#slapping your boyfriend is stupid and hurtful and also stupid in human culture and he would get arrested#unrelated tk that. sqh still being a spy for mbj in cang qiong and getting a mission years later to instate sqq/sj as the qing jing peak lor#d#poor guy is so so fucked#sj becoming mbjs assassin. hear me out#a human most trusted advisor slash spy and a human assassin truly mbj is making bank#sj is also sqh's assassin lowkey. man who is intensely furious and learned how to channel all that into productive murder instead of. well#how does this fit with lbh? with sy? with fucking oh god YUE QINGYUAN??? well we'll find out!
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Prompt 251
Danny is tired and annoyed. On one hand, his parents took the whole ‘so I might be slightly dead’ pretty well! Which is good! On the other, they decided to send him and his sisters to their uncle while they take care of the Guys in White and refurbish the house to be, well, him safe. Which meant a ridiculously long flight all the way to New Jersey.
A flight he was pretty sure happened to be illegal what with the fact that neither of them were asked for their IDs or anything despite having them with them. Hm. Y’know he’s not going to question it, he’s getting a nap the moment they get to Uncle Harvey’s.
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#Harvey & Maddie are half-siblings#Two-Face grumbles but honestly also loves his nephew & nieces (wait he thought they only had one niece-)#Look it’s not the first time Jack & Maddie have broken laws and they’re not gonna let GIW hurt their kids#Danny is going to get an autograph from Poison Ivy for Sam#Jazz is going to get an interview from Harley if it’s the last thing they do#Harvey to Two-Face: We can’t get arrested with the kids plz don’t mess with the bats#Give Two-Face a name challenge#Ellie loves her uncles Harvey & Archie#Danny to Jazz: So we’re not going to talk about how our uncle is pretty much a mafia boss right#Jazz: I don’t think you realize what I witnessed before you were born Danny#Jazz: I’m gonna lay low so I can be a brain surgeon & if we can use this to our advantage we will
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To keep yourself alive AND stay sane you need an internal Senshi AND a Sam Vimes.
Senshi is there to remind you to eat, but Sam Vimes is there to parry your extended relatives rancid political takes at family events and keep you from going insane
#dungeon meshi#senshi#terry pratchett#discworld#sam vimes#i learnt firsthand that if you can't convince someone that black people are people too and killing people is generally bad#you can pivot and argue the point of 'a policeman's job is to arrest people not kill he's not a judge or an executioner'#when my father tried to talk his rancid political takes with me when i was half delirious with fever#it was like the spirit of sam vimes himself was speaking through my mouth it was amazing ive never felt so powerful before#i firmly believe this is the closest a person can get to having a jojo stan in real life#highly recommend
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Cassandra: Come on, pick up! Pick up! Bela: *picks up* Cassandra: Hiii~ I love you so much! Cassandra: Can I have twenty thousand Lei? Bela: Why on Earth do you need twenty thousand Lei???? Cassandra: Oh, you know for an escape room??? Bela: You're joking right? Bela: What kind of escape room costs twenty thousand Lei??? Cassandra: Prison Bela:... Bela: I'll be there in ten. Bela: Idiot.
#incorrect quotes#house dimitrescu#cassandra dimitrescu#resident evil village#daniela dimitrescu#resident evil 8#bela dimitrescu#re8#alcina dimitrescu#listen when bela heard that 'i love you so much' she knew she should have hung up#she knows that NOTHING good was coming out of her sister's mouth#but props to cass she tried to ease her into it instead of just saying that she's in prison#girlie is learning important skills#while giving her big sister a major headache#cass's definition of fun is either a near-death experience or getting arrested#on a good day she can achieve both
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michael kinda giving live slug reaction here
#lesbian lindsay bluth can be so personal#someone needs to get her OUT of that lavender marriage#gay marriage is legal now! you’re free queen!#but legit how do you explain ‘i could do something like that’#like damn EVERYONE is having a go with lucille 2#arrested development#michael bluth#lindsay bluth#gob bluth#tobias funke
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Hi! Please please please, could you tell me more about your coffin chain ideas?/nf
I am obsessed but barely anybody has jumped onto the ship yet and I am VERY new to the fandom so I wanna wait with making it myself until I know more lol. You are lowkey fueling this entire operations and I wanna thank you for that either way.
(rubs my paws together) you have no idea what you've unleashed anon i've been holding onto this ask specifically bc i've been sapping dopamine from it like a little leech waiting until i had time to hastily doodle up a little dynamics timeline for different stages of the ot4
i REALLY hope this makes sense . i feel the need to say this every time i post abt coffinchain but my ideas are rly specific and i've had time for them to infect my brain like mold so i'm defo ready to accept this all being rly niche and really just for me and like 3 other people
buuut if this little peek into my mind speaks to ANY of y'all i absolutely encourage implore and beg you to send me asks and ideas and whatnot about these 4 bastards literally whenever you want!!
TL;DR one half of the trauma bonded couple reaches out and forms an immediate kinship with the big scary guy that no one likes & convinces his petty boyfriend to let him fw them. then he starts bringing his deranged fbi otter around they start double-dating only for it to become a situationship and then the worst polycule ever
#saw#coffinchain#chainshipping#coffinshipping#hoffstrahm#hoffstrahmdonheight#i can't thank you enough btw i literally get so excited that people are actually interested in coffinchain... my beloveds!!! my ot4!!#also i didn't wanna draw more heads and make this post super long but this is w/o even explaining my ideas about the others to y'all#i love perezmanda/puppetshipping so i'm rly into strahm eventually confessing all of this to perez and begging for her to trust him and lik#not get them all arrested. just long enough to hear him out about how he wants to domesticate these poor freaks#and at first she's REALLY skeptical and then amanda won't stop YAPPING girl just wants to get a rise out of her so bad#also i love extended jigsquad casts. logan gets to be there bc i say so. as well as brad and ryan bc i think they're funny#and i love lawrence just inexplicably having goons#okay i'll stop rambling but see just 1 ask and you've already got me feeling insane about my brainrot#HOPEFULLY i'll have some fics soon and i can just actually put a name and fic series to my silly au thing... if y'all would want that#asks#anonymous#cat scratches
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#arrested development#gob bluth#tony wonder#oh how i’ve missed tumblr#missed posting all my funny tweets here#they get zero likes on twt but r occasionally beloved here#anyway i finished arrested development#& also jus got done watching the lego batman movie so#u can imagine how that led 2 this tweet#will arnett#ben stiller
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Look I like Roger enough, I understand what he represents and I generally don’t think he was a bad dude. I do however think he was shit at interpersonal relationships because, what the fuck. Whitebeards crew is infinitely more well adjusted and I’d say he arguably had the more traumatic death.
Like what even, what kind of planning leads a 53 year old man to sire a child knowing he is dying of an incurable illness and is about to turn himself in to be excuted by the marines where he will cause so much chaos it is literally still turning the world on its head 22 years later. He knew he was going to cause so much of a stir that he literally disbanded his crew and told them to spread far and wide to keep them safe. Because he knew the marines would hunt them far and wide But yet he still brought a baby into the world. Babe. What the fuck? What even is that? What was the thought process. I sincerely hope it was an accident and not a deliberate attempt to bring about a new era.
Because if so babe I need to see the recipe or I’m afraid we can never let you cook again
#even tho that baby was ace and I love ace#it’s the way I don’t think there is a single former member of his crew that we’ve seen that I would say is currently happy#like don’t get me wrong I respect his will he seems like a great dude#but you know what they say about great men they’re often not good men#like definition he burned to bright he couldn’t help but leave all his loved ones in the dust as he burned himself out on a fiery explosion#the absentee father vibes are strong with this one#I would argue that he gave all 3 of his sons complexes#fucking ace has such terrible self worth issues and lived his life waiting to die.#shanks is also trying to drink himself to death is so chill it is literaly hazardous to his health and had his dreams arrested at 15#and Buggy is the worst case of forgotten child syndrome and arrested development that I have ever seen#I wouldn't say someone like Marco is currently happy but you can definetly see a future where he is after the grief settles a little more#but it’s been 22 years and Rayleigh is still drinking himself into a stupor and waiting for the second coming of his captain#gol d roger#portagas d. ace#gol d. roger#roger pirates#whitebeard pirates#throwing thoughts to the void#one piece#op#one piece thoughts#one piece meta#I know people like to paint his as this mastermind that practically orchestrated the current happenings in canon#but I think they forget just how much that would make him a giant asshole. pulling the strings of peoples lives#which is such anthesis to everything we know about him and his resemblance with luffy he’s never try to control his crews lives#especially not from beyond the grave#I genuinely think he planned none of it he was just a man trying his best and falling short in some areas#shanks#silvers rayleigh
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Hoi Zäme, New Jersey
back in 2017, nico wrote an article for the players' tribune detailing his experience in the draft. i recommend reading the whole article, it's very short and sweet
#those last two lines are gonna put me into cardiac arrest#i believe in fate because how else can you explain THIS#he was destined to be a devil :')#you also get to see the nico that was still getting used to american culture & expressions which i think is very endearing#anyways rereading this article after the 22-23 season & knowing how stacked next season's roster is gonna be made me very emotional#18 year old nico would be so excited#nico hischier#njd#nj devils
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have been chipping away at a drabble of twitch & grace first meeting again in london a few months after twitch rescues him from the ice,,,,,at this rate it's gonna be just endless silly dialogue
#for crucial context grace is working with the constables & twitch gets arrested#and is just There. in a holding cell to annoy him#i am still so anxious posting writing & anxious about writing at All so who knows if#it will ever get written Or posted#but i can post little pieces. baby steps 🫡#ok goodnight#wtf was my writing tag#fred drabbles#???#twitchery#grace#oh hey i can use the ship tag#gritchposting
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EVERYBODY BEHOLD THE CUTEST BOY E V E R OMG I SQUEALED, BABY MAN!!!!! NEW CYBIRD ART OF THE SILLY DROPPED THIS MORNING FOR HIS BIRTHDAY:
Link to the original post below!
#ikevamp#ikemen vampire#ikevamp comte#ikevamp saint germain#LOOK AT HIS ADORABLE LITTLE SPARKLY FACE HE'S SO HAPPY#A DRESS IN EACH HAND#what is it about chibis that just. initiate my babying instinct#I WANNA SMUSH HIS CHEEKS BETWEEN MY HANDS CUTIE#that may be the feral comte stan in me talking BUT ANYWHO#he has no business at all being this adorable#sir you are under arrest for cuteness crimes#only way to atone is a life sentence. IN MY ARMS--#i will never get over how he's just like 'nothing can stop me dresses will be procured; jewelry bestowed'#literally its always just mc: 'i love you just as you are.' comte: 'and I love you just as you are. new bracelet be upon ye'#october is the best month ever i LOVE it here#i haven't seen him rendered this precious in a long time muah muah abel#my entire morning has just been that vine where its like 'i want to see my little boy! HERE HE C O M E S'
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Me whenever this scene comes up
#velvet is better than me bc i wouldve started strangling his ass as soon as he got the fraud part out#then when he started to weasel out of going to jail by saying he had a “change of heart” i wouldve drop kicked him then & there#like did bro really think the justice system would be like “oh ok nvm just let him go then” after he said he was sorry#but then again they let the chef and bergans run free so troll logic kinda fluctuates depending on the movie#also one more thing before i stfu#what was the reason for that moment between floyd & ven at the end if he & the rest were just gonna watch them get arrested anyway#like the whole reason viva & bridget became friends was bc bergans had w change of heart and agreed not to eat trolls anymore#but no the gay man and his sister are the ones who have to go to jail#like im surprised they didnt keep veneer and let velvet go to jail 💀#ok im done bye#can you tell who im biased against#also if i got any of this wrong pls refresh me i haven't watched the 2nd movie and its been a bit since i first saw the 1st movie#dont yell at me ;-;#velvet and veneer
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I feel like these two would be k-pop stans
(Also sorry about the shitty image I need more dashi and peso images)
#octonauts#not actually a K-pop stan myself BUT my friends are they look like they would fuck with it#like I can imagine them getting together and learning the dances#peso would LOVE newjeans#and TWICE because hey we love girl groups#and Dashi would LOVE black pink#like imagine these two just vibing to Magbetic together#they both cried when jungkook got shipped off#they probably have a countdown until he gets out#I also reckon when like kwazii or tweak gets pissed off with them they’ll be like I hope jungkook dies in battle and they would just like#die but like in a silly way#they would also fw straykids cause yes#I know too much for someone that doesn’t even listen to kpop#they also would’ve been hysterical when mingi got arrested for that escooter incident like what a loser#Octonauts dashi#Octonauts peso#yeah so that was a rant#Octonauts music hc#kpop aesthetic#also sorry I meant Suga I get them mixed up lol
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I've spent a massive amount of time with straight people this week, and I've surmised that they almost exclusively talk about the following subjects:
- Harry Potter
- Their children / future family-making plans
- Travel (always tropical or warm)
- How little they have in common with their spouse
- Sports
- Diets
- US politics (we're in Canada)
#not to be a hater but im so anti-straight lol this is known#and i have straight friends it's just oppressive when you're the only queer person around#everyone talking about how much they love florida and i'm sitting there like#i would be arrested if i went there. i would not be safe.#also can everyone please fucking drop harry potter i hate hearing about it#*disclaimer blah blah* not trying to be an exclusionist or whatever#but straight people just experience the world slightly differently and it really comes out#in conversations where there's only one non-straight person#i feel like this is implied but they were all cis#i should also say that i enjoy talking to people and usually have fun with these conversations#but i just get tired.#okay no more disclaimers i'm allowed to say down with cishet on tumblr
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