#Royal College of Surgeons

[stairnaheireann]

#OTD in 1892 – Birth of insurgent and trade union leader, Rosie Hackett, in Dublin.

Rosie Hackett was a trade unionist, a founder-member of the Irish Women Workers’ Union, and supported strikers during the 1913 Dublin Lockout. She later became a member of the Irish Citizen Army and was involved in the 1916 Easter Rising. Rosie, christened ‘Rosanna’ was born in Dublin on 25 July 1892. At the time of the 1911 Census she lived on Abbey Street with her mother, sister, stepfather,…

[thepastisalreadywritten]

Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill (30 November 1874 – 24 January 1965) was a British statesman, soldier, and writer who twice served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, from 1940 to 1945 during the Second World War, and again from 1951 to 1955.

[industrybuzz]

Anning's Ichthyosaur Re-Found

Anning's Ichthyosaur Cast Re-Found Decades After Fossil's Destruction

Anning’s ichthyosaur has been rediscovered, in a way, 71 years after its fossil was destroyed in London. Mary Anning, an early paleontologist, discovered and excavated a small fossil in 1818 in southern England. It was complete and clear, appearing to be something between a caiman and a fish, and helped fan the early flames of interest in paleontology. The anatomist Everard Home named it a…

[stijlw]

Two small cross-stitch samplers made to commemorate an operation, 1848. The first sampler reads 'Chloroform June the 9 1848' in green, the second 'Charlotte Waite' in red. Charlotte Waite (b.1837) of Saltburn, North Yorkshire, had her leg amputated when she was eleven years old after a fall from a carriage seat. Chloroform anesthesia was used during the operation, its use in medicine having been first reported by the Edinburgh Surgeon James Young Simpson just 7 months previously. Charlotte made a good recovery and went on to raise ten children.

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

CanMEDS 2025 affords us the opportunity to think critically and propose a vision for the practice of medicine which is rooted in social justice, anti-racism, anti-oppression, and cultural safety, promoting a broader cultural shift which is necessary for the profession. As a profession and a health system, we participate daily in the perpetuation of structural violence upon those most marginalized amongst us, particularly those who are racialized, and live at the intersections of marginalization because of our race, ethnicity, religion, sex, gender identity, social class, ability, immigration status and more.

A new model of CanMEDS would seek to centre values such as anti-oppression, anti-racism, and social justice, rather than medical expertise.

==

In short, sacrificing human lives to the altar of virtue signalling; putting ideology ahead of merit and actual medicine.

[shetheyshenanigans]

Being a woman in STEM sound great until I had to cite my sources

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

What I could read: :)

WHO WERE THE RESSURECTIONISTS?

MUNGO DALRYMPLE (1790-1829)

Perhaps one of the most notorious names asociated with The Ressurectionists was Mungo Dalrymple (1790-1829), an Edimburgh doctor who hanged himself in disgrace when it became public knowledge that he was buying cadavers from body snatchers, for his medical students to dissect.

Born in Carsphairn, Dalrymple had a meteoric rise to fame in the Scottish medical establisment when he became one of the Royal College of Surgeons of Edinburgh's youngest ever members at the age of 22. Dalrymple was passionate about the study of anatomy, giving many well received papers on the subject.

He was prine however to making enemies and earned a reputation for mercilessly skewering pomposity wherever he found it. This did not endear him to the senior doctors and surgeons of the Edinburgh medical establishment and Darlymple ruffed many feathers and as aresult had few allies when the bodysnatching scandal eventual broke.

FUN FACT Up until the 19th century, barbers carried out many surgical procedures in their shops!

...

Darlymple's downfall came when one of his suppliers, commonly known as 'Ressurection men', was suspected of murdering several of his lodgers in order to supply the doctor with a steady stream of cadavers. Eagle eyed landladies, Mrs Cat Clarke and Mrs Caro Clarke bravely confronted the murdere when he was attempting to conceal the body of his last victim in a barrel of pickled herring, and raised the hue and cry.

...

[marzipanandminutiae]

I'm sorry I just saw an article on the "dangers of corsets" citing another article from 1952, saying it conclusively linked the disappearance of chlorosis to women no longer wearing corsets

except

A. women wore other, arguably less practical shapewear in 1952 with no function besides fashion, and

B. chlorosis doesn't exist

or at least, we're not sure to what modern-documented disease the term refers

it was a condition written about whereby young women suffered paleness of a greenish hue, weakness, aversion to food, shortness of breath, and swollen ankles- although the symptom list could grow to the point where it verged on being as catch-all as "female hysteria." most modern doctors consider hypochromic anemia the likeliest candidate for what this actually was, although some have also suggested endometriosis

it didn't Disappear. we developed a better medical understanding and stopped using the term. and I'd expect a modern article from the Royal College of Surgeons of England to understand that

oh and the link between "chlorosis" and corseting is hot nonsense. hypochromic anemia is genetic or caused by vitamin B6 deficiency, certain infections and parasites, copper and lead poisoning, and as a side effect of certain medicines. endometriosis could be genetic, or caused by a number of factors ranging from hormones to surgical complications. nowhere did I see any mention of abdominal pressure as from a corset causing either

(other winning "sources" from this article include Here Is A Drawing Of The Venus De Milo Next To A Fashion Plate From 1880, and Preserved Ribcage Of An Elderly Women That We Can Tell Is Deformed By Corseting And Not Literally Any Other Cause Because Sir Erasmus Wilson Said "Trust Me Bro" In 1884)

[amuseoffyre]

History time:

Mr. Dalrymple, the eminent surgeon in episode 3 of S2 of Good Omens, appears to be inspired by Robert Knox, an Edinburgh surgeon famous because of his connection to the Burke and Hare murders in the 1820s.

He became an anatomist at the Edinburgh College of Surgeons in Newington and quickly developed a reputation as a lecturer that guaranteed him a steady flow of students, but as with Dalrymple in the show, the shortage of available cadavers was a constant and persistent problem in the city.

Since it gets a bit grisly, I'll pop it behind a thingie.

Graverobbing became so common that many of the graveyards in the city installed watchtowers to keep an eye on the graveyards and some of them had mortsafes put in place:

The coffins were locked in these cages to give the bodies time to get to the stage of decay that would render them useless to anatomists, then popped in a grave afterwards.

This is where Burke and Hare enter this story. They lived in the slums of the old town of Edinburgh and learned that the surgeons would provide money in exchange for fresh bodies, so rather than dig up the graves and risk the watchmen, they cut out the middleman and started murdering people for profit.

Robert Knox was their primary customer and he claimed to be oblivious to the crimes that were being committed, even though Burke and Hare were showing up with unsettling regularity with fresh corpses, but since they were killing the poor, no one was really paying much attention.

According to Mr. Knox, he thought the men were picking up corpses from the poor houses, though there is evidence that suggests he was aware of what was happening: one of the victims was a well-known boy with distinctive physical disabilities who would have been well-recognised. According to contemporary accounts, Knox had the young man's head, hands and feet removed, so no one would recognise him.

Since this could never be proven, he wasn't arrested for his part in the whole affair, but he was described as being "deficient in principle and heart" and public opinion spoke loud and clear. He left Edinburgh in disgrace and was eventually also debarred from teaching by the Royal College of Surgeons in England.

Eventually, laws were brought in to prevent grave robbery, but not before dozens of people were killed for profit.

[scotianostra]

October 4th 1716 saw the birth of Scottish physician James Lind

Born in Edinburgh in to a family of merchants, Lind was educated at the Royal High School.

In 1731, aged 15 he registered as an apprentice at the College of Surgeons in Edinburgh and in 1739 became a surgeon's mate, seeing service around the world in the Navy.

James Lind is remembered as the man who helped to conquer a killer disease. His reported experiment on board a naval ship in 1747 showed that oranges and lemons were a cure for scurvy, he selected 12 men from the ship, all suffering from scurvy, and divided them into six pairs, giving each group different additions to their basic diet. Some were given cider, others seawater, others a mixture of garlic, mustard and horseradish. Another group of two were given spoonfuls of vinegar, and the last two oranges and lemons. Those fed citrus fruits experienced a remarkable recovery. While there was nothing new about his discovery - the benefits of lime juice had been known for centuries - Lind had definitively established the superiority of citrus fruits above all other 'remedies'.

In 1748, Lind retired from the navy and went to Edinburgh University to take professional qualifications. In 1753, he published 'A Treatise of the Scurvy' and in 1757 'An Essay on the Most Effectual Means of Preserving the Health of Seamen in the Royal Navy', which threw much light on the appalling living conditions and diet of seamen. In 1758, he was appointed physician to the Naval Hospital at Haslar in Gosport where he investigated the distillation of fresh water from salt water for supply to ships.

Although the importance of Lind's findings on scurvy were recognised at the time, it was not until more than 40 years later that an official Admiralty order was issued on the supply of lemon juice to ships. With this, scurvy disappeared almost completely from the Royal Navy.

[stairnaheireann]

#OTD in 1976 – Death of insurgent and trade union leader, Rosie Hackett.

Rosie Hackett was a trade unionist, a founder-member of the Irish Women Workers’ Union, and supported strikers during the 1913 Dublin Lockout. She later became a member of the Irish Citizen Army and was involved in the 1916 Easter Rising. Rosie, christened ‘Rosanna’ was born in Dublin on 25 July 1892. At the time of the 1911 Census she lived on Abbey Street with her mother, sister, stepfather,…

[thepastisalreadywritten]

NOTE:

“While our review is ongoing, we have decided to temporarily pause applications on both the record titles for oldest dog living and ever until all of our findings are in place and have been communicated,” the spokespersonn said.

She added that it would be misleading to suggest that Bobi had been stripped of his title as “no action has been taken in relation to any record holders yet.”

[redavexat]

In case you missed any of the text, all of it is written here:

Medical transition works

80% of individuals reported significant improvement in dysphoria

78% of individuals reported significant improvements in psychological symptoms

72% of individuals reported significant improvement in sexual function

positive results across the board, even in 15- year follow ups

Source for all above: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/19473181/

"Wellbeing was similar to or better than same-age young adults from the general population" source for the above:

Quality of life increases dramatically with 'gender affirming treatment

source for the above: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6224813/

Long term follow-ups: https://www.jsm.jsexmed.org/article/S1743-6095(15)32422-X/fulltext

The above link shows as unsafe when you open it, it'll give you a message before sending you to the page. I'm not familiar enough with how websites work to confirm whether proceeding past that point is safe, click past the pop-up message at your own risk. I did, and the article IS there.

social transition works

"Shown to correlate with improved psychological functioning"

Source for above: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1054139X1630146X

levels of depression and anxiety which closesly match levels reported by cisgender children

Source for above: https://www.jaacap.org/article/S0890-8567%2816%2931941-4/fulltext

puberty blockers are safe and reversible

Hormone blockers are the only treatment used on adolescents that are completely reversible.

Source for above: https://assets2.hrc.org/files/documents/SupportingCaringforTransChildren.pdf

"Current evidence Does not support an adverse impact of gender- affirming hormone therapy on cognitive performance"

"Our results suggest that there are no detrimental effects of GNRHA on EF"

source for above: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0306453020301402?via%3Dihub

"Relieves stress for trans adolescents"

"is reversible"

Source for above: https://academic.oup.com/jcem/article/102/11/3869/4157558

"Poorer psychological well-being before treatment"

Source for above: https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1054139X20300276

"Behavioural and emotional problems and depressive symptoms decreased"

source for above: https://sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S1743609515336171

Hormone blockers are not new: "Since the mid 1990s..." and "The Royal college of psychiatrists, in 1998..."

source for above: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/26895269.2020.1747768

Many more studies: This screen of the video is far too small and compressed for me to read most of these links. If anyone knows of a higher quality version, thatd be great.

Puberty blockers aren't harmful to bone density: https://www.eurekalert.org/news-releases/842073

Puberty blockers don't cause osteoporosis or sterility: https://academic.oup.com/jcem/article/84/12/4583/2864749 Transphobia is real [personal side note, this comment isn't in the video: Does this really need a source to begin with?]: https://fra.europa.eu/sites/default/files/eu-lgbt-survey-results-at-a-glance_en.pdf

46% felt discriminated against or harrassed within the past year for being trans

29% felt discriminated against when it came to looking for employment

70% hid being trans during schooling before becoming 18 years old

55% had an incident of violence within the past year in part or whole because of them being trans

The ~40-50% Suicide rate is fake It's the attempt rate: https://transequality.org/sites/default/files/docs/resources/NTDS_Report.pdf

The suicide rate is undocument and doesn't exist.

Discrimination is harmful

The attempt rate rises for people who: Lost a job due to bias (55%) were harrassed/ Bullied in school (51%) Had low household income were the victim of physical assault (61%) were the victim of sexual assault (64%)

Same source as above for attempt rate

Other factors include: gender-based victimisation discrimination bullying violence being rejected by the family, friends, and community harrassmentby intimate partner, family members, police and public discrimination and ill treatment at health-care system

source for above: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5178031/

[Another illegible "Many more studies" screen]

Social/ familial support helps:

[Top link doesn't work]

[next is too illegible]

It can decrease the likelihood of a suicide attempt 57% -> 4%

Chosen name/ pronoun use does the same:

https://www.jahonline.org/article/S1054-139X(18)30085-5/abstract 71% drop in severe depression 34% drop suicidal ideation 65% drop in suicide attempts

Gender and sex aren't the same These institutions and organisations would like to disagree with you: American Psychological association American medical association American psychoanalytic association Human rights campaign american academy of pediatrics american college of osteopathic pediatricians royal college of psychiatrists United Nations United Kingdom's National Health Service (NHS) American academy of child and adolescent psychiatry American academy of dermatology American academy of family physicians American academy of Nursing American academy of physician assistants American college health association American college of nurse-midwives American college of obstetricians and gynecologists American college of Physicians American counselling association American heart association American medical association American medical student association American nurses association American osteopathic association American psychiatric assocation American Psychological association American public health association American society of plastic surgeons Endocrine society GLMA National association of nurse practitioners in women's health national assocation of social workers National commission on correctional health care pediatric endocrine society society for adolescent health and medicine world medical association world professional association for transgender health world health organisation (WHO) Stanford medical American pediatrician association National institutes of health Canadian institute of health research scientific american

[the-fiction-witch]

Future

Media The Artful Dodger

Character Jack Dawkins

Couple Jack X Reader

Rating SAD

I finished up with the usual rounds on the ward, so I headed down to the morgue for the usual Thursday afternoon. I wandered down the stairs before arriving at the small morgue room where the bodies lay ready for the afternoon. And she stood. Miss Y/n Y/l/n, stood in her sage green dress with her parasol folded in her hand. "Good Afternoon Dr Dawkins," She greeted with her usual firm smile, "Afternoon," I greeted, I shut the door with my foot and began to roll my sleeves as I headed to the body, "You remember what we were doing today?" "Of course." she smiled setting her parasol by the door and grabbing her patron which she wrapped quickly around her back in a bow and she pushed her hair back from her face, she came over and stood across the table from me, "Go on," I nodded as I handed over the blade, She smiled and set her spectacles from the chain around her neck onto her nose and she took it to begin as usual.

I paced around her as she worked only speaking up if I needed to, but I often didn't much need to anymore. She was well used to this by now, I had taken her sort of as a student I suppose. She wanted to learn and I didn't have anything better to do, she knew the rules of society meant she could never be a surgeon even if I admit I wish she could be, she was better than Sneed, better than Prof., hell with practice she could be better then me, that and she pays me, she gets an allowance from her father most of which she pays me to give her these lessons, and frankly her payments are about the only money I have coming in other then cards. She worked slowly and gracefully, never missing a beat often I only spoke to remind her of things most of which she already knew. I had to admit my eyes lingered on her hands as she worked so gracefully, on her face so poised and yet distant today, the chilly air of the morgue had somewhat been warmed by her presence.

I was… well aware of my feelings for her, but I did my best not to think of it. I am her teacher after all it wouldn't be proper talk about abuse of power, I'm a doctor, her teacher, and I'm older than her. Even if… I had felt like maybe she could have reciprocated it wasn't worth the madness if someone were to know. We chatted with each other as we often did about the business of the hospital and such like before she began humming as she was working it was a strangely… melancholic song, slow and distant as she hummed without her usual joy and spark. But even so, It's a morgue so I glared at her.

She glanced up over her spectacles, "I take it silence is preferred?" "Silence is better Miss Y/n," I remind her, "It can help you focus, and allow your hand to concentrate, the morgue is a good place for silence as it is for examination, study and where the people go when it's over." "Very well, Sorry." she answered, "it's fine. I know what you're like." "if silence is better why do the surgeons perform to a crowd shouting and drinking?" "Becuase we need to get paid." "Fair enough," she chuckled, "I am struggling a little." "With?" I asked as I came over again, "This was A Sneed patient yes?" "How'd you guess." "The general state of it." "well yes you are correct this was Sneed's doing." I chuckled, "He can be a bit heavy-handed," She rolled her eyes, "the man's a butcher. How he got a degree from the London Royal College of Medicine frankly astonishes me" she explained, "Forgive me I should not speak of the doctors as such he is your colleague" She said as she took back her words, which was very strange Y/n was the sort of girl to say things and deal with the consequences it isn't like her to be apologizing for such things, I gave her a reassuring smile and I couldn't help but laugh, "Don't worry, I share your concern over Dr Sneeds' lack of finesse. He is rather…inelegant. I often find myself wondering as well, I have been half tempted to get his degree down from his bedroom wall just to see if it's written on the back of some shipping letter," "Or written in pencil." "You dare me to go check?" "No, no. it's alright Doctor Dawkins." "You have a lot of potential you know," I told her, "I do?" "Mhm, Great potential. You study hard, you practice whenever you can, you listen to directions, and you don't have much of an ego, You tend to sell yourself short a lot of the time Miss Y/n." "I suppose, I just don't much bother." "Becuase?" "Becuase, I know I won't ever be a surgeon." "Maybe… someday." "I lack one key feature to be a fantastic surgeon." "What would that be then?" "A cock." I couldn't help but laugh, "As skilled as I may be doctor dawkins, a lady cannot be a doctor let alone a surgeon. My dreams of surgical work are merely that, Dreams."

I looked at her for a while and my heart did feel sore for her, I know this is what she wants and I know I'm just giving her false hope by teaching her but still… I didn't want her to feel like this. "Well, if you may doctor Dawkins." She said setting her blade down as she finished up, yet again I noticed her usual joy and perky smile was gone today and it began to grow heavy in my mind, "Alright, alright, back from the table Miss y/n." I told her so she stepped back and I came in to investigate her work, "Humm… Yes… yes… very good… Ummm? uhh yes. Yes very good." "Can I get a curve for the fact it was a Sneed patient?" "No, no, you know the rules I don't grade on a curve." I warn her playfully, "You can't control how someone shows up," I remind her, "I think… I shall give you a B." "a B?!" she proested, "I'll bump you up to an A- if you can sew it up to thread snip in under two minutes." I offered, She nodded so I happily moved letting her come back and prepare her needle, I grabbed my watch and let her sigh a moment "Ready? Time." I told her starting the watch, She moved as she often did gracefully and efficiently, moving the thread with ease and skill even under pressure, and she finished the last stitch and snipped the thread so I stopped my watch. "Time?" "Forty-seven seconds," I told her, and I admitted I was… proud of her, I couldn't help feeling a sense of pride for my little pupil getting so good,

She let out a sigh of relief and began to pack away she pulled her spectacles off her nose and let them hang as she started to clean off her now bloody hands, "Something you wish to say Doctor Dawkins?" she asked as she washed them, I then noticed it had been a couple of minutes of me just kinda staring at her, "Actually, yes. I was…merely going to express my respect, my admiration and approval for your work today. each time I see you I am impressed by your skill and ingenuity, your precise and swift determination, and your quick work and agility in closing the body, even in light of Dr Sneed's butchering, was extraordinary." For a moment neither of us spoke but she let a smile slip, "Thank you, Doctor Dawkins, That means a lot." "You're welcome. Enjoy your A- for this week." "Thank you, but… it is still a hollow victory," she said sounding distant and strangely wishful "How so?" I asked, "A- is good." "Yes, it is but uhh… It's hard to explain." she said, "I somewhat feel… like a weather vain on an old abandoned house." She said I looked at her questionably a little curious if this was what had been going on with her today, "Elaborate." I told her crossing my arms, "I feel like, spinning. Working endlessly hard but not moving. Spinning away putting in all this work but, there's no one in the house, no one in town, no one to see the work I do. That I'd be better off just giving in and letting one little breeze send me plumping to the earth with the rest of the decaying house." She explained, The metaphor was, heartbreaking. And I admit I understood her feelings. "I- I understand it must feel that way, for a woman wanting a career such as this to feel like you're working to not get anywhere. But that doesn't mean you not still doing good work, you're dealing with bodies in a hospital morgue yes it's not being a surgeon but you're still doing a lot of good work. Why do you feel like it's not worth it anymore?" "it certainly feels that way," she said

I couldn't help but feel for her, to see herself feeling alone and devoid of any purpose. I feel deep empathy for her struggle and her sadness, and I don't know how to express my seriousness without coming off as if I was mocking her due to our usual playfulness. I wanted to speak up but I didn't, suppose that's the story of our whole relationship in one sentence isn't it, I want to speak and words linger behind my teeth. "Still." She stiffened herself, "Mustn't sour an afternoon." I noticed her changing as she made herself stiffer and proper, more upset, and clearly feelings of despair. But I don't know how to help her and yes we may be playful but I'm her teacher I don't even know if asking such things would be appropriate or if it was if she'd even tell me. I find myself admiring her in the way that she can so easily go from melancholy to a stiff upper lip. I nod my head slightly, Y/n straightens her dress, and my eyes are drawn to it, It suits her figure well and complements her fair complexion. I can't help but feel a bit of a bubbly at the sight of her, despite knowing that we are strictly in a professional relationship as teacher and student, I can't help myself some days. My gaze travels back to Y/n's face, My attention is drawn to her face, how it has such an alluring quality to it. The curves of her cheeks and jawline catch my eye, as does her soft and delicate mouth. The light shines on her face through a nearby window, making her skin glisten in a truly mesmerizing way. I can't help but feel so smitten by her. "I uhhh I have something to tell you, Doctor Dawkins." "Oh?" I asked as her words woke me from my daydreams, "This uhhh… this will have to be our last lesson for a while," she said forcing out her words,

"Oh? your father cutting your allowance or something?" I chuckled, "No, No I uhh no," she said, I couldn't keep this up so I spoke up, "Miss Y/n. Are you… alright?" "Well, I uh…" She trailed off, "Please, I want to know if everything's alright, you've not been anywhere near your normal bubbly playful self, you seem so sad, so distant, is it something I said?" "No, No…" She began, "My father. Found out about this," My blood ran cold, I knew of her fathers… disapproval of her interest in such things, I felt angry and upset, but I felt so terrible for her. "I uhhh I'm sorry to hear that Y/n. I take it he is forbidding you from coming again?" "He is yes." "Well, we can just hope he forgets about it in a month or two, like last time." "I uhh I'm afraid not." "No?" "I'm getting married, next month Doctor Dawkins." "M-Married?" I asked immediately my heart sank to my feet, my stomach jumped to my throat I… found myself unable to give a good appropriate formal response to this, I forced myself to swallow my feelings and force a smile to my lips, "L-lovely. I uhh I do hope to be invited to the wedding. Who, uhh Who's the lucky groom them?" "I don't know." "…what?"

"My father-" "Your father arranged it?!" my anger rising, she nodded, "You're father found out about all this and is not only forbidding you from coming back but is selling you off like some mare with some arranged marriage!" Immediately I noticed how angry I had gotten so I calmed down as best I could not wanting to upset her more. I forced my frustration away, it's not like I can argue against this marriage. I simply nod my head. "He did, he is insisting on the end of our lessons, I know nothing of my new husband," she said forcing back tears, "You… don't want this do you?" she shook her head, "I do not wish to but father is insisting and… I will not be permitted to do such things once I'm married" My heart broke for her, I could hear the pain in her voice. The mere idea of being forced into marriage against her will is disgusting, and the fact that her father has so little consideration for her. However, I know that my personal feelings are irrelevant in this situation as much as I'd want them to be relevant. And yet, I cannot help but feel a profound sense of guilt for my inability to help her, as her father is clearly determined to make this marriage happen, against her wishes. I swallow my feelings of sadness, attempting to push them down to prevent myself from becoming overwhelmed with sorrow. But she broke me.

"he demanded I become a housewife, to merely cook, and clean and bear him, children…" She said and the moment she utterly those words it was the a dam burst and her eyes flooded with tears her cheeks became waterfalls, as if all the feelings she had concealed all set loose at once. I felt so angry at her father the anger boiling in my bones for him that he cares so little for his daughter, that he cared so little for what she wants that he'd strip her of all that made her who she is just to make her some boys housewife. But… I can't bear to watch her cry like this, I felt as overwhelmed with sadness as her, but I hid my tears as best I could, I felt so responsible. If I hadn't been teaching her then maybe her father would never have done this to her, Maybe I should have spoken to her father stepped in and protected her, I know I can't say anything, I can't say or do what I want to do. I wanted to go over take her in my arms, kiss her, tell her how I feel for her, comfort her and dry her every tear but… I know what would happen if anyone knew I did so, "You've told him you don't want this?" "I have begged him on my knees to stop this… But he will not. In just a few months it will be over. My whole life will be over and I will be… A bride." And I snapped, "Your father's disregard for you and his disregard for your happiness is distasteful. He does not love you. He does not care about your well-being and he treats you with a complete lack of respect. It is obvious that this marriage is a means to an end for him, a way to control and suppress you and to satisfy his egotistical desires." I said taking her hands in my own, but my words gave her little help,

"I… I would give anything to escape this" Her back hit the wall and her body slowly sunk into a pool of grief and despair, My heart shattered for my sweet y/n, I could barely contain my heartaches as I witnessed her tears I wanted to reach out and embrace her, but I knew that would be inappropriate, as she sat there she just looked so helpless, nothing like the y/n I knew no fire, no energy, no passion, no joy, just this helpless, hopeless, face of sadness to be stripped of her individuality, I felt like I needed to fight for her, for… us. to fight if I ever wanna see her again. I moved to her side sitting beside her with a decent gap between us and I supported her as much as I could without touching her or holding her even if I wanted to. slowly she runs out of tears not because she is no longer sad but purely with no more tears to cry, "you think I'd have made a good doctor?" Her heartbreaking question caught me off guard, and as I couldn't comfort her any other way, I told her the truth "Absolutely. You have a remarkable mind, and I do not doubt in my mind that you would have been an excellent doctor. Your knowledge of anatomy and physiology, your observational skills, and your ability to remain composed in high-pressure situations, are all exceptional qualities that would have made you a top-notch physician. I am sure that any medical institution would have been fortunate to have you as one of their own." She nodded sniffling her tears "You think I'd make a good housewife?"

I recoil slightly at the thought of her stuck as some housewife, "No. No, I think you would make a horrible housewife. Such a lifestyle would deprive you of your freedom, your intellect and your individuality. You are a force to be reckoned with, and the thought of you being limited to the mundane duties of the average housewife is… frankly a waste of talent." For a moment My Y/n slipped back in like I was seeing her through this forest of sadness, "I'd be more worried I can't cook" she said jokingly "Can't you?" "No. I can make soup if I have a recipe." I couldn't help but laugh to think how women pride themselves on their cooking, to think the way to a man's heart is through his stomach and she can't cook. "I don't imagine you being a very good housewife." "I'm sure something is transferable, I can sew a body, I suppose I can sew a shirt." I chuckled, "Maybe, I think you'd be better off marketing on your soup than your sewing." "Depends on the man I guess." "True, what do you know about him?" "…Only what he expects of me. to be a wife, to clean his home, to cook his meals." she explained," I have begged and pleaded with my father but he ignores me."

I turned to face her, my expression stiffening as I saw her sink further and further into hopelessness. I want to slap her father for causing her such misery. The very thought of her being forced into a marriage with a man who expects her to be obedient and subservient, a man who sees her as nothing but a thing, an object for his personal use and amusement, drives me up the wall. But I can only grit my teeth as I hear her. I want to go over to that man and give him a piece of my mind, to knock some sense into him and force him to see how terrible he is being to his daughter. "Your father is a stubborn and obstinate man, this much is clear. He has his agenda and is seemingly unwilling to listen to reason or your feelings. It is frustrating, to say the least. I know how hard you have tried to make him see your side of things, Your father is an idiot. He doesn't know what he's doing, and he has no appreciation for your potential or your intelligence. I don't know why he is so insistent on a marriage with this unknown man, but I can tell you now that such a marriage is a disaster waiting to happen. You are worth so much more than a life of servitude to this man, but I am not sure your father realizes this.” "He wants me to be a good wife, as does my husband. He wants a housewife, to cook, clean, and give him children." I shuddered to think of her having such a life, even when I did think of my feelings for y/n she was always by my side, taking her almost as my head nurse or apprentice as well as my wife, we'd share chores and cuddle in bed at night, not this life of work and baby making. "… You know what makes it worse?" "What?" She for a moment seemed the saddest he'd ever seen her, "I… I can't have children," she whispered

"That's not your fault." I rushed to comfort her, "You can't be blamed for what you can't do, if your husband doesn't like that it's his problem, not yours." I told her trying not to clench my fists with this rage inside me, "but he wants them. Already in his letter, he has asked for me to plan for many of them… My father knows if my condition says that when I have a husband it shall go away… But I know it won't, I can't have children, even if this man was kind I would disappoint him in the only way he cared for…"

I … I didn't know what to say or how to help her, she was to be sold off like some breeding cow for this sick bastard, he doesn't love her or care for her at all, yet he'd wed her in a month and take her as his own, she… she deserves so much better than this. She leant over to set her head on my shoulder and I took that as my time, I couldn't contain myself any longer, and I wrapped my arms around her to let her cradle herself into my chest, I know I shouldn't do this but I can't be expected to sit here and do nothing, she sinks into me gripping my shirt tightly tears soaked my clothes, I held her close inhaling her scent, holding her soft skin, It broke me down to see the woman I care about brought down like this. She began to shake in my arms so I felt her tighter giving her every comfort she needed, I cradled her head and rubbed her back to soothe her, I wanted to be here for her. I felt her relax into my arms a little but neither of us let go, it was clear she…needed this comfort long before today and I was a fool for not giving it earlier. "Thank you, Doctor Dawkins."

I held her tighter trying to give her everything I felt in one long embrace, how I hated her father and his treatment of her, how I didn't want this to be her future, how I wanted to be with her, how I wanted to steal her away and be her knight in shining amour away from all of this, how I'd make her my princess, my queen, how… I loved my sweet y/n. How I knew in my heart she was worth far far more than the fate she had been offered.

"I … I have truly appreciated your lessons more than you know I wish I could articulate but I am not one for words, please don't blame yourself for my pain, I have so enjoyed our time together learning and listening, if I could have it any other way I would I had hoped that perhaps… But it doesn't matter now. But thank you For everything " Ohh god damn it, you can't just say that to me and expect me not to start crying for you… I sniffled my tears and tried to hide myself away "Yes, I have also learned a great deal from these lessons of ours, you have always been a most keen and attentive student. I will be proud to know that I was a part of the journey for you even if the destination is now what you wanted." "thank you" she nodded, "I should… I should go father will be expecting me" she said gathering her things and wiping the last of the tears

she began to get up and I couldn't help but wish that I could reach out and pull her back toward me once more. I don't care what her father expects of her, I want her in my arms and I want us to just hold each other for as long as she wants. However, I knew this would not be proper, so with a heavy heart, I let her go. she went to the door and got her things giving herself an adjust, I met her by the door and almost held my breath, she came and wrapped her arms around my chest burrowing into me, but I didn't care I wrapped my arms around her as tight as I could, my heart beating out of my chest for her, I took in her softness, her sweetness, her scent, her feeling, her … everything. Holding her just felt so right, like we were two pieces of a puzzle made to fit together, I don't care if it's wrong, I don't care if it's not proper, I can't help myself, "thank you for everything, Jack…" She whispered, I may never see her again for god sake! I want to hold her as long as I can, I want to wrap her in my arms and protect her from everything in this world that may hurt her. "Goodbye -"

And I lost it, "Wait!" I held her tighter my voice faltered and broke as I spoke, "Please. Please before you go just… just let me…" "Yes?" she asked looking up at me with those sweet little eyes, I looked deeply into her eyes, feeling incredibly conflicted about what I was about to do. I know it would be inappropriate, but the desire is stronger than any other. Finally, I feel if I don't I never will, I lean down to kiss her on her forehead. She needs someone to care for here, and I have to be that for her. She has saved me many times by being there when I needed her. To think this could be My final moment with her… As I lift myself away, I feel my heart racing and my chest thudding with every beat. I see her looking at me with a look of bewilderment and surprise, and I feel incredibly guilty. This is not right, but at the same time, I need this. I need this more than I can put into words. I want to leave her with something she can treasure and something that will comfort her. And so I lean down once more, this time bringing my lips near to hers.

After all this time, all this wanting, all this needing, I finally kissed her. As her lips touch mine, all of my fears and worries and inhibitions melt away and I lean into her kiss, relishing in the sweetness. I am taken by a wave of pleasure and ecstasy that I have never known before, and I can't help but stay in this moment for as long as possible. I don't want to let her go, and so my lips remain pressed against hers for as long as she'll let me, She softly kissed back and I felt like I was swimming in an ocean of delight. We kissed for a good few seconds before I pulled back.

Both of us blushed hard in a rush of emotions after just crying and now kissing, but I loved every moment of it, every inch of her, it made me wanna kick myself for not doing it earlier, and all I wanted in the world was for her to stay in my arms and kiss me again. So… I did, I let down and kissed her again holding her even tighter she kissed back happily but with a slow sadness to it, when we pulled back the feeling of the kiss lingering on my lips made me tremble slightly, as I watched her pull away. There's an awkward pause between us, and I'm not sure what to say or do at this moment. "Did- did you mean to kiss me?" I wasn't sure how to answer her for a moment, "I- I did." "did you… want to kiss me?" "Yes. I wanted to kiss you." "Jack… please don't kiss me just because you pity me." The words stung like a knife. I don't want her to think that this is just pity and sympathy motivating me. She is much more than that. I feel like if I try to kiss her at this moment, but I want to tell her… I want to tell her everything "You're more than my student. You-…" "I'm what?" "you're More than my student. More than just an object of compassion or pity. To me, you're…" I explained trying not to cry, "To me…. you're special. More than special." "More than special?" "You're Y/n." I told her, "My y/n. at least I always wanted you to be… My Y/n." "You did?"

"I think I fell in love with you. I didn't mean to, I didn't notice at first I didn't even realize until … it was too late I was trying to fight it, I didn't want to feel anything for you. I'm your teacher, your doctor, But I don't think I can deny it any longer." "… Ohh Jack" she broke into a smile tears down her face, "I fell in love with you, after our second lesson." "You've loved me since the second lesson?" She nodded now crying joyful tears but I was right there with her, "I love you too. I've loved you for a long time, I just haven't been able to admit it to myself or you…" I told her "Wh- why couldn't you have told me this months ago… If… If you had told me before my father found out, then we… We could have married." She said, "We'd have trained and learnt together, worked together side by side, that would have been our future," Her words cut me deeply, but I can't help but recognize the truth of her words. If only I had been mature enough to speak up earlier, maybe things could have been different for the both of us. But I let my my fear get the better of me, and now the consequences of that are here to bite me in the ass, "I'm sorry. I was scared to say anything. I wanted to protect you. I wanted to keep you safe…" "… I'm hardly safe now, am I? Being prepped to be sold into the arms of another." She said, "It's too late now…" "If I'd have known I-"

"Jack, believe these words more than any other, if you and told me. I'd have married you in a moment, I'd have built a life with you so happily, if I could I'd have pushed back the tide, stole the moon, purged the world for you. And if that life was an option now, I'd give my life for it" Her words filled me with such love, unable to hold back my feelings any longer the idea, of rules, society, and what other people would think I didn't care! I love her! I love her more than anything! I don't care what I have to do all I want is to be with her, to be with my Y/n. My hand began shaking, and my voice broke as I spoke "I want to marry you. Take my hand and leave everything behind. I don't care about society or what it thinks of me anymore. I want you, and only you. You are the love of my life, and I would rather die than be without you."

"as would I… But it's too late" she answered she held him in a tight hug for a moment and kissed his lips but this kiss was cold and empty, and I felt as if I had just thrown away the most perfect thing I could have wished for, "Please, don't leave. I won't let this be the end. I can make this work, we can still get married and have a life together. I can't lose you, not like this…." "Please don't make this harder than it already is," she pleaded, "I wish… our future could have been different," she gave my lips a final kiss, "Goodbye Jack." She took her things, and left the morgue I wanted to run after her! I wanted to chase her down take her in my arms and run away with her. But I stayed still with so much left unsaid and left undone, I let her go. And I left the best thing I had walked out of my life.

[whenthegoldrays]

ELLY'S TOP TEN K-DRAMAS (with songs to match!)

(an updated version of this post can be found here)

10. Would You Like A Cup of Coffee? (2021)

Centers around Kang Go-bi and the regulars of 2Dae Coffee. Coziest show ever.

Song for this drama: Slow Down

9. Our Beloved Summer (2022)

Former high school/college sweethearts Ung and Yeon-su are brought back together by work five years after breaking up. My favorite OST!

Song for this drama: skinny dipping

8. The Matchmakers (2023)

A royal decree to marry off old maidens forces uptight prince Gyeongwoonjae and professional matchmaker Soon Deok to join forces. Prettiest show you've ever seen.

Song for this drama: Caught In A Blue

7. Extraordinary Attorney Woo (2022)

Woo Young-Woo navigates her career, life changes, and love as a rookie at Hanbada Law Firm and a woman on the autism spectrum. Young-Woo is a darling, and her boy is the greenest flag ever.

Song for this drama: pov

6. Familiar Wife (2018)

A married couple who have fallen out of love get to see each other in a new light after the husband, Ju-hyeok, goes back in time and changes their history. You've never rooted this hard for such an infuriating man.

Song for this drama: No One Knows

5. Castaway Diva (2023)

After 15 years stranded on a desert island, Seo Mok-ha pursues her dream of becoming a singer while searching for the boy who helped her escape her abusive father. Despite the horrors, this show will make you believe there is good in the world.

Song for this drama: Sweet Chamomile

4. Hometown Cha Cha Cha (2021)

Yoon Hye-jin moves to a seaside town to open a dental clinic and finds the home she always wanted amidst its colorful residents. So funny and the male lead is basically the perfect man.

Song for this drama: Apple Pie

3. Crash Landing On You (2019-2020)

After a freak accident lands her in North Korea, Yoon Se-ri must rely on the soldier who saved her life in order to survive, stay hidden, and get back to South Korea. Rips you apart in the best possible way.

Song for this drama: If I Never Knew You

2. Live Up To Your Name (2017)

Renowned acupuncturist Heo Im falls 400 years through time and lands in Seoul, where his life and fate intertwine with cardiac surgeon Choi Yeon Kyung. Beautiful, unmatched chemistry.

Song for this drama: epiphany

1. Twinkling Watermelon (2023)

Ha Eun Gyeol is mysteriously sent back in time, where he meets his parents as teenagers and discovers he didn't know as much about them as he thought he did. Peak family feels, peak soft couple, and peak enemies to lovers.

Song for this drama: Long Live

[ltwilliammowett]

Naval Surgeon's medicine chest, belonging to surgeon Sir Benjamin F. Outram (1774-1856) and reputedly used at the battle of Copenhagen 1801

Outram was first employed in the naval medical service in 1794, and was promoted to the rank of surgeon in 1796. He served in HMS Harpy, HMS La Nymphe, and HMS Boadicea. He was surgeon in HMS Superb in the second battle of Algeciras, where Sir James Saumarez obtained a victory over the French and Spanish fleets on 12 July 1801. He received war medals and clasps for his services under Sir Richard Goodwin Keats. Then for a period he was surgeon to the royal yacht, HMS Royal Sovereign.

In 1806, with a view to private practice, Outram went to Edinburgh, and there graduated doctor of medicine on 24 June 1809. He was admitted a licentiate of the Royal College of Physicians of London on 16 April 1810, and then began as a physician at Hanover Square in London, where he lived more than 40 years. He acted as physician to the Welbeck Street Dispensary. On 3 May 1838 he was elected a fellow of the Royal Society; he also became an early member of the Royal Geographical Society.

In 1841 Outram became medical inspector of her Majesty's fleets and hospitals. He was appointed Knight Commander of the Order of the Bath (KCB) on 17 September 1850, and was admitted a fellow of the Royal College of Physicians on 9 July 1852. He died at Brighton on 16 February 1856, and was buried at Clifton, Bristol.