#Roman is absolutely the mom friend

[incorrectsandersidesquotes]

Pattom: Man sure is dark in here.

Patton: I'm not scared or anything.

Roman: ...

Patton: I mean who is scared of the dark these days? not me no sir.

Roman: Do you want me to hold your hand?

Patton: Yes please.

[lovelookspretty]

lover of mine

drew starkey x actress!reader au

— in which drew and y/n, secretly exes, must fake date in order to keep the peace at a mutual friend’s wedding, but the forced proximity makes them question whether they ever truly moved on.

warnings: y/n lowkey being difficult because she doesnt want to lie to her best friend, DREW TRYING HIS BEST

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authors note: okay she was a little UGHcore but i just needed a rocky start before things got cute n theyll be communicating soon. guys i promise theyll get better n y/n also wont feel so guilty as time goes on !!!!!

you gaze up at the home through the window of the car. drew is driving beside you, insisting you begin the plan by arriving together to the address leila forwarded to everyone.

“it’s . . . i didn’t think it would look like this,” you say aloud, and drew turns down the volume of the radio after he parks the car out front.

the house is big, surrounded by a few others down the road that look similar to it. the first floor seems like a basement area because the stairs at the front of the house lead all the way up to the second floor and continue two more, standing at four in total.

it’s just a few miles away from town that you and drew were able to drive by and take a look at on the way there. the area is beautiful. no wonder why leila’s mom and her boyfriend stay there.

the front door is open and you spot leila’s head peeking out of the doorway just on time. she disappears for a moment before she’s leaving the house to hurry down the stairs, probably to greet you both. you’re already unbuckling your seatbelt and getting out of the car to meet her halfway.

“isn’t it amazing? was it a safe drive from los angeles?” leila asks as you quickly greet her with a hug, before you walk her over to drew’s car. he’s opened the trunk and back doors to retrieve your things. “two weeks here will be nice, huh?”

“oh absolutely,” you agree with her, and you grab your purse from the backseat and drew’s backpack, then shut the door. “is everyone else here?”

“yeah, they just got here an hour ago—gia brought her boyfriend, roman. he’s a little shady but they’re kinda cute. libby’s here too, ooh, and oscar, theo’s childhood friend,” leila says and you can just hear the excitement in her voice that makes you smile.

you hold one of the straps of drew’s backpack and hold it up for him to take it while leila keeps talking. you watch as he eyes it for a moment before looking at you, as if he’s wondering why you don’t want to take it.

the thought doesn’t even cross your mind but it’s fine. he takes his backpack and slings it over his shoulder, then continues to grab the handle of his suitcase and carry it out of the trunk, then yours.

you stand there and wait for him to hand you something to carry but he just keeps his backpack on both shoulders, shuts the trunk, locks the car, and then grasps both suitcase’s handles with either of his hands, ready to head up. there’s a faint smile on his face when he faces you and leila.

“you’re taking them?” you ask, referring to both of your things so you can just bring your purse to the house.

he nods like it’s nothing, “yeah, i got it.”

leila can’t help but awe at you two. “you guys are so adorable. theo and i missed having you both around,” she says as she turns around and heads to the home.

at her words, you peer over your shoulder and send drew a knowing look, but there’s a slight twinge of guilt in both of your expressions that you have to shrug off.

you and drew stand side-by-side as you confront the home, watching as leila walks up the steps and is immediately approached by theo, who hands her a drink.

they share a kiss, and right past them you can just barely spot a few figures that must be the rest of the group. they’re shouting and laughing with one another, leaving you to look at drew again.

he gives you a nudge. “professionals, remember?” he’s referring back to your initial conversation about the plan just two weeks ago.

something about all of this just makes your stomach turn, but you nod. “professionals,” you repeat, and then look at the house again, then you take your step.

you’re carefully settling down on the bed leila’s given you and drew. it’s in a separate room right next to where she and theo will be sleeping. and of course, there’s just one bed.

“i can take the couch tonight if you want,” drew offers as he sets both of your belongings on the side, but he’s talking about sleeping on the small couch on the opposite side of the room to the bed, just against the window.

“it’s just sleeping in a bed, star, it’s nothing we haven’t done before,” you tell him with a shake of your head, and drew’s shoulders drop ever so slightly at the sound of his old nickname, the one that once rolled off your tongue so effortlessly. now, it feels like a small peace offering, a reminder of when things were simpler.

he gives it a few moments to make sure you’re okay with it, before he nods. “okay,” he says.

you check the time on your phone. it’s already eleven in the morning and leila said she wanted to go swimming in the afternoon. you have a whole beach ahead of the house but she insists on using the pool in the back. theo even suggested earlier that he and oscar can grill some lunch.

“i should get ready,” you say as you stand and toss your phone on the bed, then approach your suitcase. there’s a knock at the door and you know it’s leila. “i’ll be out soon, sorry!” you tell her, hoping you’re loud enough for her to hear you from all the music they’re playing out there.

you glance up at drew when you see he’s just standing there. “what are you gonna be doing?” you ask him, then rifle around your clothes for a bikini.

he scratches the back of his head as he settles on the couch, and he shrugs, “might join theo and oscar since they’ve been down there already.”

you only nod as you find a matching set that you’ll decide to wear today. drew is looking around the room, even outside where the views are like paintings on a canvas.

“this place is so nice,” he says, a little too casually, like he’s trying to ease the awkwardness. “lei’s mom really knows how to live it up.”

you don’t respond right away, focusing on your makeup bag that you need to retrieve something in. it’s not that you don’t hear him, you just . . . don’t feel like talking. when you finally do, your voice comes out flatter than intended. “yeah. it’s a nice place.”

tension lingers heavy in the air. you hear drew shift on the couch, probably sensing your mood, but he continues. “kinda reminds me of that trip we took up the coast. remember that little inn with the—”

“i don’t really want to talk about that right now,” you cut him off, your tone sharper than you mean it to be. you don’t look at him, you just reapply your perfume as if it’s the most important task in the world.

there’s a pause, and you can feel drew’s gaze on you. “right,” he says quietly, “sorry.”

you exhale, trying to shake off the tension building in your chest. you know it’s not his fault—not entirely. this whole thing was a bad idea from the start, but you agreed. you’re here. and now, you’re stuck with him, in this room, pretending like everything’s fine when it’s the furthest thing from it.

“i . . . didn’t mean to snap,” you say, softer this time. “it’s just, i’m still not completely okay with all of this.”

drew leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “i get that. but we’ve already talked about it. we agreed to do this, and now we’re here. you know that it’s too late to back out.”

you close your suitcase with more force than necessary, finally looking up at him. “yeah, but it wasn’t my idea to lie to my best friend, drew.”

his jaw clenches for a second, and you can see the faint flicker of hurt in his eyes, but he doesn’t lash out. he just nods, “i know it wasn’t. but you’re here. you agreed.”

you purse your lips, frustration building. “yeah. because you asked me to. not because i wanted to.”

he runs a hand through his hair, letting out a slow breath. “i didn’t want to drag you into this if you were gonna be miserable the whole time.”

“i’m not miserable,” you snap, but the lie feels heavy as it leaves your lips. you avoid his gaze, the weight of everything sitting on your shoulders. “i just don’t want to pretend everything’s okay when it’s not.”

he’s quiet for a moment, the silence thick between you two. “i’m trying, y/n,” drew says finally, his voice low, almost pleading. “i’m trying to make this less . . . awkward, but it feels like no matter what i say, it’s wrong.”

you just fold your arms, staring at the floor. “maybe that’s because it’s not just about this trip. it’s about everything that happened before.”

drew’s expression hardens, but he doesn’t argue. “i know. i just thought that maybe this could be a chance for us to be around each other again. figure things out.”

you raise your eyebrows. “figure what out? there’s nothing left to figure out. we’re not together. and pretending like we are just feels wrong.”

he’s silent for a long moment, staring at you like he’s trying to find the right words but can’t. eventually, he just stands, moving over to the window. “if you want out, y/n, you can tell them the truth. i’m not gonna stop you.”

you swallow hard, not knowing what to say to that. of course, he’s not wrong—you could end this charade whenever you want. but something keeps you from doing it. maybe it’s the fear of letting everyone down. maybe it’s the guilt of seeing leila so happy, thinking everything’s fine between you and drew.

or maybe it’s something deeper—something you’re not ready to admit to yourself yet.

“i’m not gonna ruin leila and theo’s plan,” you mutter, more to yourself than to him. “i’m sticking to ours.”

you’ve collected your swim suit and a pair of shorts and head for the bathroom. before you close the door behind you, you hear drew’s quiet voice, more resigned than angry now.

“i’m trying, y/n. i wish you’d let me.”

you’ve joined leila downstairs, as she’s planned on preparing other food for todays lunch in the kitchen, so libby, gia, and roman are already there enjoying themselves. they’re mainly just talking, not doing much other than that. leila’s already set everything up for you and her to work on for the next half hour or so.

you greet libby and gia with a small wave, having already said hello to them when you first got there. libby is a publicist in hollywood who met leila while she was filming some indie movie earlier in her career. she was brought in to manage leila’s pr during a press tour and boom—immediate friends.

gia and roman came sometime after. all you know is that leila met gia at a party like you and leila. gia’s incredible in fashion and helped leila with some of her carpet looks. roman’s just this alternative musician who she started dating this year. cute, but a little weird, like leila said.

“so, you and drew starkey?” roman asks as he pops a grape in his mouth, eyeing you. “i thought outerbanks didn’t have a girlfriend.”

“you thought that, and a lot of people still do,” you tell him. leila’s showing you her plan on what to cook while you watch. “he and i like to keep it private.”

“more like a complete secret,” he says, in which gia has to smack his arm to tell him to stop talking. “what? nobody knows.”

“some relationships work better that way,” you say.

“yeah, maybe take a page out of their book and do the same,” libby tells roman, and you see leila smiling at her friends as she works on dicing the vegetables. “there’s a few photos of you two out on the internet. i mean gia, baby, if i were you, i’d keep it a secret. roman’s so blah.”

he shakes his head at her and it makes you smile this time. libby catches it and grins, giving you a nod as she peels her orange.

after eating lunch and playing around in the water for hours, you all finally settle at the firepit, minus gia and roman who insisted they needed to sleep earlier because of their flight in today.

you’re leaning back against the seat, sitting next to leila who’s wrapped up in her blanket. the boys and libby are talking on their own about whatever. you don’t know. you just see drew smiling and constantly leaning forward and laughing, in which you tell him every time to be careful in case he gets too close to the fire.

your focus wavers when you feel his hand casually rest on your thigh. it’s not possessive, but there’s a weight to it. you immediately stiffen, your body instinctively tensing at the sudden contact.

your gaze flicks to his hand, then up to his face. he’s not even looking at you, continuing his conversation, acting as though the gesture is completely natural. it’s all part of the act, you remind yourself. he’s only doing it to make sure no one suspects anything. you know you can’t react—any sign of discomfort would raise questions you don’t want to answer—but it pulls you out of the moment with leila.

you force a small, tight smile and try to refocus, nodding along to whatever leila is saying.

“how have you and drew been?” she asks you, and you suddenly feel that guilt creeping up on you at that moment. that’s a terrible question.

you blink twice, considering your words before speaking, “we’re good, really good. it’s gonna be a little hard when drew leaves to film soon, but you know how it goes.”

she hums. “that’s how theo said he felt like when i was away for white lotus,” she says gently, understanding where you’re coming from.

you smile, but the weight of your lie settles deep in your chest. it’s a weird feeling, pretending to be something you're not, especially when leila’s eyes are so kind, so trusting. you know she means well, but there’s just so much guilt.

leila tilts her head and leans it on the back of the couch, watching you. “it’s tough, isn’t it? balancing everything—work, life, love. theo and i had such a hard time with it at first.”

you nod, keeping your hands busy by fiddling to avoid looking at her. “yeah, it is. i mean, it’s always been a challenge with our schedules.”

leila’s brows furrows slightly. “you two have always seemed like you handle it so well, though. what’s your secret?”

your heart races a little, and you force a chuckle. “i guess we’ve just gotten used to it.”

the words feel hollow, and you wonder if she can sense it. it’s not a complete lie—you and drew had gotten used to it all, but that was before everything fell apart. before the distance between you became more than just physical.

leila catches your eye again, her voice softer. “you two have always been so private. it’s kinda nice, though. you don’t have to deal with all the drama the rest of us go through with the media and stuff.”

you force a laugh, and you can just feel the warmth radiating off your body. “yeah, it has its perks.”

you can’t even look at her. your gaze keeps getting drawn to the fire that leila can just sense the awkwardness, tilting her head a little, and you can see the faintest trace of concern in her expression.

“you okay, y/n? you seem . . . i don’t know. tired?”

“i’m fine,” you say, a little too quickly. you clear your throat, trying to keep your voice steady as you continue. “it’s just . . .” you pause, checking that the others aren’t listening before leaning in to speak quietly, “drew and i, we’ve been under a lot of pressure lately. work and everything. i think it’s just catching up with us.”

leila nods, sympathy in her eyes. “i get it. it’s hard when you don’t get enough time together.” she pauses, looking like she’s considering her next words. “but hey, at least you’re here now. a couple of weeks without any distractions, right? this could be good for you two.”

leila’s gaze shifts to the others where drew is still laughing with theo, libby, and oscar. her voice softens again, and she leans closer to you this time. “it’s just nice to see you both here. i don’t think i’ve even seen him since that last time we all hung out a year ago. it’s been a while.”

your heart drops because she’s right—the last time she saw drew was when you were still together, a year ago.

leila just smiles, “well i’m glad you’re both here. theo and i were saying how we miss having you two around more often. it’s gonna be so fun, just like old times.”

you nod, the guilt wrapping itself tighter around your chest, making it hard to breathe to your own best friend. you manage to force another smile, but it feels brittle, like it could shatter at any second.

just then, drew catches your eye as you and leila continue your conversation. his grin falters for just a second when he sees you, like he knows what’s on your mind. and for a brief moment, you wonder if this whole charade is even worth it.

“yeah . . . just like old times.”

@rubixgsworld @itgirlbrina @thepopcultureaddict @samsmelodrama @kissfinalgirl @itsamegazaddysworld

[trippinsorrows]

through your eyes + au 3

authors note: well. this got freaky. some smut ahead, folks. this really is starting to feel like a completely different story, low key.

part one // part two // au solana instagram

warnings: smut

taglist: @sayyestoheav3nn @fearlesschimera @cyberdejos2 @annfg8 @trentybenty @sabrina-carpenter-stan-account @zoeyybellex3

word count: 4.3k

"I need to talk to you."

Solana should have been talked to someone about this.

But, she's felt torn.

Torn on just who she can talk to about it.

And lack of options hasn't been the issue.

If anything, there's a copious amount of resources and trusted confidants she could go to. Courtesy of her large family, host of cousins, and other good friends.

It's actually easier to start with who would absolutely be the worst person to go to.

And her mom, interestingly enough, is that person. Ironic given how close she is to her madre. One of her best friends, in many ways.

But, not for this. Because Nina will go to Xavier, Solana's dad, and somehow Wes, Solana's brother, will get involved, and it'll just be a whole mess.

Beyond that, there's her cousins. Jade and Anriel will scold the living shit out of her and probably confide in their mom, Solana's aunt Sharmell, out of concern. Aunt Sharmell will go to her husband, Booker, who won't hesitate to literally fly out to Miami just to tell his brother, Xavier, Solana's dad. Thus, the whole damn family knowing.

Then there's her cousin, Roxanne. Roxanne would be great if not for her inability to hold water. And Solana definitely doesn't need her mom's side of the family knowing. They'll kidnap her and force her to live in Mexico for the rest of her life, believing she's gone mad.

Might not be too far off though.

Rhea will just kick her ass for being so 'fawkin stoopid'. Jaida will encourage it, because Jaida encourages all things questionable. But Kayden....Kayden could be the one.

She's also bound to not respond well, but still, someone Solana knows will ultimately keep this between the two of them.

Kayden Carter looks over at Solana with intrigue. With over 15 years of friendship, she knows when her roommate and best friend is truly in a dilemma, that nervous, panicked voice she typically uses present already. This is definitely one of those times.

"Okay." Kayden motions for Solana to sit down on the other end of the sofa, waiting until she does so to ask, "what's going on?"

Solana takes a deep breath, both hating and needing to share this. "You know the event I attended with my family this weekend?" Kayden nods. "I—I met someone there."

At that, Kayden lifts a pierced brow. "Oh?"

Solana looks away, explaining, "I was trying to get away from Ethan and ran into this man by accident, and he ended up helping me out. Pretending to be my date or whatever. It got Ethan to leave me alone, so that was good."

"Forget about Page's annoying ass, what about the man? Is he attractive?"

Solana scoffs. "Very." She's not quite sure how to describe just how fine Roman Reigns is. "But—"

Kayden's expression sours. "He's an asshole, isn't he?"

"Notorious." Though Solana does her best to stay tucked away in her little corner of the world within that's away from the mafia life, she's not stupid nor entirely disconnected. It's common knowledge that Roman is a dick.

And yet....

"But, he was nice to me. He's been nice to me." Kayden's expression shifts into confusion, Solana clarifying, "he—he came to my job this morning."

"Holy shit, he's serious about this." Kayden scoffs and smiles, clearly intrigued by the mystery of it all. "Wait, who is this guy, Sola?"

And now, here comes the part that Solana has been dreading since decided she would confide in Kayden. "It's....it's Roman."

Kayden blinks, not catching on. "Roman who?" And it's just one 'you know' look from Solana that has her eyes widening. "No." Solana closes her eyes. "Please tell me you're kidding." More silence provides the answer she's certain her roommate didn't and doesn't want to hear. "Roman fuckin' Reigns? Solana, have you lost your mind? Do you know who he is?"

Solana leans back into the sofa, murmuring, "of course."

"No, you must not, because this man is the devil himself. He's a monster, Solana. If you heard half the things he's done, you'd be running the opposite way. You'd be on the other side of the goddamn world to get away from him." Kayden continues to freak out, lecturing and chiding Solana for what she clearly feels is a bad call. "I just-I don't understand. Solana, you've always been so against our world. You've essentially lived in seclusion just because you don't want to be a part of it, and now you're entertaining the literal embodiment of said world?"

Solana runs her hands over her face. "It's not—it's not like that."

"Then tell me what it's like, because maybe I'm just confused, but I'm pretty sure you're telling me that you're talking to Roman Reigns?"

That's exactly what she is, but Solana is lost on just how to express that despite everything that's been said about this man, in the two interactions she's had with him, he's been nothing but kind. In his own way, of course.

"He....he hasn't been that way with me," she finds herself defending while also recognizing that it truly is a weak defense. "He's been....nice. He helped me out with Ethan. He came to see me at my job just to ask me out--"

"Wait, he already asked you out?" Kayden looks like she's about to spazz out even more. She shakes her head, taking a second to calm down. "Solana, you're my best friend, and I love you, but he's probably just trying to fuck you. You're gorgeous with a great body, and he obviously sees how innocent you are. It's just a chase."

It makes sense, and Roman more or less confirmed as such with his comment about wanting her with no clothes on. That should be enough evidence for her to find a way to ward off his advances.

But.....

There's this part of her that's absolutely intrigued by him, as he so smugly pointed out. A part of her that wouldn't mind to get to know him more. Even if it makes no damn sense to her.

"I can take care of myself." It doesn't come out as confident and assured as she would like it to be, nor is she entirely certain of her assertion herself, but it's expressed regardless. "I—I can handle this."

Kayden looks just as unsure as Solana feels. "Your family doesn't know, do they?"

"No." Her eyes widen a bit. "No one does, except you now. So please, please don't say anything to anyone." Solana needs to at least figure out just what's going on before she has to face the inevitable backlash from her family and others.

Kayden shakes her head. "You know I got you, girl. Even though I do think you're fuckin' crazy, you've always supported me in my fucked up relationships, so I'll do the same with you." Kayden suddenly gives her that teasing expression, poking her arm. "Besides, it's not like he's ugly, am I right?"

So right.

"I get so nervous around him," Solana whines, laying her head back against the sofa. "He's just so....he comes on so strong."

Kayden smirks, leaning over and playfully nudging. "He wants him some Sola, girl." She laughs as Solana covers her blushing face. "Who could blame him? You're gorgeous, babe."

It's such weird experience. Solana is still trying to heal and learn to love herself again after calling off her engagement, so a man like Roman Reigns coming into her life out of nowhere and being so intent on just....her....it's a lot to digest. Because taking away all of the things about him that make him dangerous and avoidant worthy, he's still, hands down, the most handsome man she's ever seen.

"So where are ya'll going?"

Solana bites down on her bottom lip. "He invited me to WarGames. Said he'll send a car for me."

There's obvious surprise on the face of her best friend. "First date is watching him beat the shit out of other men?" Kayden says aloud, nodding and shrugging. "It tracks." Solana rolls her eyes. "Well, what are you gonna wear?"

She shrugs, truly unsure when she remembers what he said. "Something....something red." Kayden is curious, as Solana shares a version of what Roman said. "He....he asked me to wear red."

Told. He told her to wear red, but Kayden doesn't need to know that part.

Smirking, Kayden nods, impressed almost. "Damn. He already wants you wearing Bloodline colors? First lady type shit." Solana grabs a pillow and throws it Kayden's way, her friend laughing and then gasping. "Holy shit, you have to wear that red dress I got you last year for your birthday!"

The mention of that little piece Solana swore would never see beyond the back of her closet has her eyes widening. "Kayden, no, I can't. That's way too revealing."

"That's the point, duh." Kayden tosses the pillow back and stands up off the sofa, pulling Solana up with her. She then looks over at Dulce who's been sleeping peacefully as her mama stumbles into one of the most questionable decision of her life. "Come on, Dulce. We gotta get mama ready to get dicked down."

"Kayden!"

--------

Solana is a nervous wreck.

She hasn't been this anxiety ridden since taking her NCLEX-RN, and that was a damn near traumatic experience.

This is literally just a date.

Kind of.

Cause she's never actually been on a date before where the man will be preoccupied the whole night.

But, she's also never been on a date with someone like Roman before either. It's just all around a brand new experience that has her so in her head. She's in it during the car ride and especially when she arrives at the Warehouse and is escorted to Roman's locker room.

She nearly has a heart attack when the door is opened and she expects to see him waiting, but it's postponed, God looking out for her, when she sees he's absent.

The security leave her alone without any guidance or clue as to just what she's supposed to do, so Solana takes that time to text Kayden and let her know she's arrived and that she's safe.

For now.

Not wanting to focus too much on the unknown of it all, she takes in his locker room which is much nicer than what's probably necessary. Craft table. Weights section. Sofa. Flat screen TV. A trainers table. The works, essentially.

It makes sense when she thinks about it.

Roman seems like a man who only accepts the finer things in life, if not the finest.

But, it's the section on the craft table with a bottle of wine that keeps snatching her attention.

Drinking is probably the last thing she needs to be doing, but that's exactly what she does.

She quickly grabs the bottle and and a wine glass, filling it up halfway before downing almost all of it. It's the perfect combination of sweet and bitter and hopefully helpful in taking some of this edge off.

"You sure don't disappoint, do you?"

It's a pure stroke of luck that she doesn't drop the glass in her hand at the rumble of his deep voice behind her. But, it's truly a miracle that both the glass and herself don't fall to the ground when she turns around to look at him.

Mio dios.

Roman is standing by the door, his hair down and clearly wet, water droplets sliding down his bare chest, Solana unable to take her eyes off his bulging muscles and the intricate tribal tattoos that somehow add to the magnanimity and beauty of this man. He's wearing black cargo pants tucked into black boots, with the sacred, red ula fala resting around his majestic neck.

Roman Reigns in a suit is one thing.

But Roman Reigns shirtless is something entirely different.

She's almost certain the ground underneath her shakes a bit, also deeply impacted by the god among mere mortal men.

If not for Roman initiating something beyond her embarrassing gawking. she would continue to stare. For a long time. A very long time.

He walks toward her, every step bringing her closer and closer to melting into the ground. This man is a giant. In every sense of the word.

But, it's when he takes his finger under her chin, lifting her head a little and has the audacity to say, "you can do more than just look, if you want" that Solana just about spontaneous combusts on the spot.

He's maybe said a total of 8 to 10 sentences to her in the entire time they've 'known' each other, yet even in the midst of that brevity, he still gives her more of a visceral, bodily reaction than her ex ever did.

"I—" Words are a thing of the past, something she was once capable of but not anymore. The sight of God himself has a tendency to rob anyone of the right to verbalization.

Roman chuckles, his other hand moving to her hip. "You listened."

Solana is certain it's her that's trembling and not the room around her. It takes her a minute to process he's referring to her dress. "You—you said wear red, didn't you?."

"I did." He acknowledges, once again giving her a one over as he bites on his bottom lip. "Good girl."

Oh, fuck.

Solana has to get the hell out of here. The room is freaking in shambles at this point.

Or, maybe that's just her.

She's a stuttering mess trying to communicate with this man. "I—you—probably have to get r—ready."

Roman smiles, and her entire world flutters. "Do I not look ready to you?"

Hardly. This man probably doesn't even know what it's like to be unready. Never experienced that. That's a mortal thing.

"No—I just.....S—sorry."

Similar to their last two interactions, Roman brings his hand to her back and tugs her into him. Solana, once again, places one hand on his chest, not even thinking about the fact that the water from his hair continues to dampen his body.

Until water hits her palm.

Solana is on fire. In all areas. She stammers out, feeling stupid as all the outdoors for stating the obvious. "You're wet...."

His gaze flicks to the space between her legs. "I'd bet you are too."

What the hell?

How is he so.....raw?

She absolutely refuses to move an inch, refuses to cause any kind of movement with her legs that could alert her to the fact that he's probably not wrong.

Not wrong at all.

If only Roman was on the same page.

"You are, aren't you?" His eyes narrow slightly, hand gradually starting to move down from the her back to the sizable swell of her ass. "I bet that pussy dripping for me already."

Solana's eyes shut, her nails clawing against his chest. "R—roman." Her breathing is labored, heart beating a mile per fucking minute, and that only intensifies when he squeezes her ass. Her natural reaction being to arch into him, her breast pressing against his solid body. "Oh my God....."

"God can't do for you what I can, sweetheart."

Blasphemy. Filth. Pure disrespect, and yet her head drops against his chest as he slides his hand to the front of her, wiggling it between her thighs.

Solana means to stop him, means to push him away, but her body seems to have a mind of its own, because she finds herself widening her stance, giving him all the access he needs.

The go ahead.

And he takes full advantage of that, Solana gasping loudly when he moves to cup her through her underwear. Her soaked underwear. "Dripping." He taunts, and it's true. Legs no longer mushed together, she absolutely feels the wetness dripping down, soaking her panties. "I'm taking you out to dinner after the match, but I think we should just skip to dessert right now."

Eyes widening, she gasps again when Roman removes his hand and picks her up, her thighs naturally wrapping around his waist. He carries her over to the trainers table, plopping her down on the edge.

"Lay back."

Her stomach is all kinds of twists and turns. She's not stupid. Far from it. There's only one place this is headed. "I—what?"

Roman, however, looks bored, stating so plainly. "I don't make it a habit to repeat myself, Solana. Even with a pretty thing like you, so do me a favor and just lay back."

If someone told her this is how the night would kick off, she'd call them crazy as all the outdoors. There's no way in hell this man is about to do what she thinks he is.

Is he?

Voicing her thoughts, she struggles with just how to word what is an otherwise simple thing to ask. "Are you...."

His gaze is piercing. "Can I?"

What a fucking question.

Once

Once has she had someone go down on her, and it wasn't even her ex-fiance. It was a guy she dated in college for a few months. To say it was......disappointing would be an understatement.

She didn't even finish.

Back to the borderline crisis at hand, she finds herself oversharing. "My ex. He didn't—he wouldn't....."

"Well, he's a fucking idiot." Roman's cruel but accurate remark is accompanied by his big hand moving up the sides of her dress until its scrunched by her stomach. "Eating pussy is a delicacy."

Her eyes shut again. He's so nasty.

So why is it only making her wetter?

Roman's fingers lightly tugging the waistband of her underwear reminds her of the proposed question.

This is a bad idea. A very bad idea. She doesn't sleep around. Doesn't let random men go down on her, and yet, the minute Roman licks his lips, the decision is almost made for her.

"Y—yes."

That alluring, small smile is back as he moves his hand to her stomach, pushing down just enough to get her in position. "Lay down, and let me show you what it's like to be with a real man."

Sweet baby Jesus.

Solana is on the verge of a nervous breakdown, back flat against the cool table when he goes to pull down her panties, leaving her open and exposed.

She hears Roman make a sound. "Mmm. Pussy just as pretty as I imagined."

Her hands clench at her side. He's thought about this? About her? About her—

"Ahhh." Her back is almost entirely off the table the minute his thick tongue gives one full, sensation stirring lick up her cunt. "Roman...." she moans, hands planted on the table, head thrown back as his cool breath blows against her pussy.

Seconds later, his tongue is back on her, fingers spreading her lips while his tongue teases a languid circle around her clit. "Oh my....."

The sound of his deep chuckle travels from his space between her legs. "I'm gonna make a fucking mess out of you."

And before she can process that, he tugs her by her thighs, diving face first into her cunt. Solana is a mewling, writhing mess as he sucks on her pussy like its the fuel and energy he needs for the fight to come. Laps at her with a hunger and desire that nearly matches her own, because whatever her ex did to her that one time is nothing compared to what he's doing to her right now.

"Shit...." Her body is hot, her nipples hardening by the second, and Solana can't help the way her thighs squeeze against his head, her lower half coiling and twisting from pleasure she's never experienced.

"You like that, don't you?" He hums, voice haughty and knowing. "Like me eating this pretty pussy, don't you, sweetheart?"

Her answer is an obvious one, breathed out over and through heavy pants. "Shit, yes." He sucks on her clit, the slurping sound practically filling the room and egging on her moans.

He pulls away, the absence something that's so much more noticable and painful than it should be. Only for her to arch again when his finger plays around with her nectar that feels like it's spread all over her lower half at this point. "Look how wet you are. I can tell she been neglected." Roman swirls his finger in circles around her clit, thumb applying just the lightest pressure. "Can tell she been needing me."

Solana can't and won't disagree. Not that she could anyway. Logic is very much a thing of the past. The only thing on her mind is ecstasy, and he's giving her more of that than she's ever had in all sexual interactions with all of her ex's put together.

"Goddamn, you taste good." He goes back to licking and sucking on her again, groaning almost. "Would stay down here all night if I could."

Solana nearly comes right then and there.

She wouldn't be opposed.

At all.

He stays with his head between her legs for what feels like inhumanly possible, long enough for that feeling she's only ever been able to give herself starting to rise. Toes curling and stomach twisting, she manages to whine out, "Roman, I—I'm gonna—"

He kisses her clit, coaxing her, guiding her, encouraging her. "I know, baby." She can practically visualize the smirk on his face. "Now be a good girl and come in daddy's mouth."

It's disgusting how that one filthy command manages to evoke her orgasm from her, Solana nearly sitting all the way up as her release shoots through her entire body. Roman continuing to suck on her and lap up every bit of it until there's not a fucking drop left.

Solana's practically lifeless body collapses against the table. Everything below her belly button is numb. Eyes shut, pulse probably in the danger range, she has no ability to do anything other than lay there and recover.

She's never come that hard, that much, that long.

Who is this man?

Solana whimpers a bit when she feels something against her, wiping her. A towel most likely. Strong but surprisingly gentle hands help her body to lift up only for her to fall against a solid chest, her forehead against Roman's shoulder.

She clutches onto him as he kisses her temple. "That's my girl." His girl. His anything. She's whatever he says and more. That's how fucked out he has her. "I'll see you after the match, okay?"

Sure. Fine. Whatever. Her ability to agree to anything was sucked out of her by that dangerous tongue of his, so the most she can do is nod against him.

Roman chuckles and gradually pulls away, Solana gripping on the edge of the table, eyes opening just enough to see that strong, muscular back of his as he walks out the door, closing it behind him.

She isn't sure how long she sits there, dress pulled up, towel covering her bottom half. She just knows that even after sitting for what should be a long enough time, her legs are still wobbly. Even as she moves around the room to look for her underwear only to see they're nowhere to be found, leaving her with one conclusion.

Roman took them with him.

The thought shouldn't make her pussy flutter. It really shouldn't and yet, here she is.

God, what did he do to her?

Swallowing, she does her best to maintain her pride and walks out, guided by the same guard who escorted her to Roman in the first place. He takes her up to what must be VIP seating. It's the perfect view of the celled ring and cages on the side intended for the participants.

Sitting there alone and with nothing else to occupy her mind, Solana's mind starts racing. That shouldn't have happened. She should have stopped him. Should have said no.

Even if she did want it just as much as he seemingly did. Nevertheless, that shouldn't matter. He's him. She's her. They're very different people. She's supposed to have morals and standards. Women who have that don't let men who are practically strangers go down on them.

But, that's exactly what she did, and she feels terrible about it.

"You must be my brother's flavor of the night."

Solana is already nervous as all the outdoors, yet somehow the interruption of her overthinking only serves to exacerbate that anxiety.

But, when she looks over and sees the source, Solana is unsure which is worse: what's said or who said it.

Rosalia Reigns isn't as tall or built as her twin brother. Not at all. A given considering their different sexes, but she's every bit as intimidating as him, and they do share some similar features. Same set of pretty brown eyes. Those full, pink lips and that overall powerful aura.

You know just by looking at her that she's an important person.

And she is. She comes only second to her brother.

Roman

Solana swallows and adjusts her dress as Rosalia gives her a oneover, not even trying to hide her distaste. "H—hi. I'm—"

"I don't care." Rosalia interrupts, a level of venom in her voice. "You'll be an afterthought come tomorrow morning when you join the rest of his whores on the island of forgettables."

Sting.

Solana shouldn't be surprised nor hurt by such cruel words. Rosalia, much like her brother, has never been known for kindness. Regardless, that knowledge doesn't stop the tears from pooling in her eyes.

Cause the words hit way too close to home given what just happened.

Something noticed by the other woman. An equally cruel smile growing on her face. "Aww, did I hurt your feelings?" Her smile deepens as she scoffs, sitting down in her chair. "Yeah, Ro definitely dropped the ball with you. You're dumber and more naive than the other stupid bitches my brother loves to entertain."

A stupid bitch. Any other time, Solana would disagree. She may not verbalize as such, but she would inwardly reject such a thing. But, she can't. She can't because it's true.

She gave Roman exactly what he wanted. Fell into his trap. Another of many nameless, faceless, forgettable conquests.

She's no different or better than any of the other women Roman messes around with.

She's now one of them.

And she feels disgusted with herself.

Not wanting Rosalia to see her cry, or anyone else, Solana mumbles a quiet 'excuse me' and rushes past the smirking woman. She needs to get out of here. Needs to go home.

Needs to never see or speak to Roman Reigns ever again.

This was a mistake. All of it.

And it can never happen again.

[notebookqueenofnarnia]

Okay Demigods

now that Season 2 has been confirmed (!!!!!!!!!!) I am here to make my official appeal that you ALL read the books. and yes...i mean ALL the books. Because here is what you are missing if you don't:

(mostly spoiler free. mostly vibes and chaotic no context)

OG PERCY JACKSON

Percy's INCREDIBLE sarcasm

Lots of chaotic Mr. D moments

Percy's unending absolute obliviousness when it comes to: his own abilities/powers, his own feelings towards a certain daughter of Athena, and EVERYONE'S feelings towards him

the full list of Percy's felonies (it's longer than you think!)

how much Percy thinks about Annabeth, especially in the third book

The Hunters of Artemis (everyone's like 'which godly parent would you have?' but im like ??? who cares??? I'm running off with the girls to immortal to hunt men i mean monsters)

soooooooooo much Sally Jackson is the Best Mom (to everyone who walks through her door) content

BLACKJACK. TRANS ICON BLACKJACK THE PEGASUS.

Rachel. Elizabeth. Dare. (this is how the audiobook says her name every single time)

Paul Blofis

Sally Jackson, author

Poseidon: Blowfish?

HEROES OF OLYMPUS

If you don't read these books you are missing out on some of the coolest female characters Rick has created: PIPER (an iconic), HAZEL (unintentionally hilarious), REYNA (beautiful character arc), and ANNABETH's point of view will have you loving her on a whole other level, trust me

Also: COACH HEDGE

Leo

All The Ladies Love Leo

the audiobooks are INSANE. It felt like a full cast read the book, but no. it was just one insanely talented narrator.

FESTUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS (im a dragon girlie)

Personally, I spent a lot of time reading the OG 5 wondering about how Roman mythology plays into Percy's world. Uncle Rick answered my questions and answered them SO WELL

Hazel the horse girl

Frank the horsebirddolphinman

Frank, gentle himbo, my beloved son

MY FAVORITE SCENE WHICH INVOLVES PERCY NOT KNOWING HOW TO DRIVE, A HARPY, FRANK, AND HAZEL AND THEYRE ALL SCREAMING AND IM PRETTY SURE STUFF IS ON FIRE

Forced Proximity for 7 teenagers and one chaotically violent satyr (that's Coach Hedge)

Eros/Cupid being one the most genius things Rick's ever written

Percy's hate of Ares transcending god magic

(also his love of Annabeth, but that's like obvious)

PercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabethPercabe

weird barely gnome things

this one giant whose name is definitely not pronounced like female anatomy

everyone thinking Percy and Annabeth are constantly getting up to the hanky panky

a statue made me cry

Gay Grumpy/Sunshine (or should that be Death/Sunshine) origins!!

TRIALS OF APOLLO

Apollo, vain himbo of godly proportions is forced to live as Lester Papadopoulos

Percy: why

a very chaotic twelve year old daughter of Demeter

she commands Apollo around

plant magic

terrible great haikus at the start of every chapter

Sally Jackson being the best mom to everyone who comes to her door

magic shoes

a sassy magic prophetic arrow that talks in Shakespearean English

so much gay grumpydeath/sunshine content

also yes sunshine's dad is Apollo

Apollo sings

Grover! Piper! Reyna! Hazel! All the friends! Everyone

Jason! (also im sorry)

what if there were some trees who were an elite squad of warriors who also answer to the chaotic twelve year old

gay moms of the midwest

unicorns

in the last book, chiron takes the campers on a 'field trip' to help take down the big baddie and he shows up dressed as a warrior soccer mom with granola bars, water bottles, and extra swords attached to his fanny pack

a different chaotic twelve year old while fighting to the death in a building that's on fire: "CAN WE GO ON FIELD TRIPS EVERY WEEK?"

chiron: "ROSE DEAR RAISE YOUR SWORD A LITTLE HIGHER!"

okay im not going to spoil it but in the last book there is also this extremely horrifyingly violent moment that Uncle Rick somehow turns into one of the most hilarious things i've ever read

Piper in the epilogue

CHALICE OF THE GODS

more insanely funny percy first person narration

Grover, Percy, Annabeth reunite ("the gang is back together!" "The three musketeers!" "Shrek, Fiona, and Donkey!" "Excuse me?")

have you met the god of himbos? (Percy has)

SO

MANY

EASTER

EGGS

for Season one. you can totally see how Uncle Rick worked on the script and chalice together

if you liked Annabeth shoving Percy into the water....this one is for you

Percy, supreme god of snakes

the cutest cutest cutest cutest Percabeth content you will ever read

hippie gods (yes more than one)

Percy is literally obsessed with Annabeth

Annabeth already being the Jackson daughter in law

Sally Jackson and Paul and

For the record: You CAN read Chalice of the Gods without reading the other series, but please please please read all these books. The audiobooks are phenomenal.

[poppitron360]

I’d like to dive deeper into my thoughts on Caleo, bc they have been taking up most of my brainpower rn:

I get where Rick was going with it. I really do. They started off hating each other, Calypso thinking Leo was really annoying and just generally being like “why is this tiny human talking to me?”, but then they grew closer, realised they misunderstood each other, and bonded over common ground. It’s sweet. But the thing is, Rick? You’ve already got a character that did all that with Leo in the previous book!

And his name is Frank.

1. You’ve already set up that dynamic! Why not spend more time focusing on fleshing out that existing arc instead of creating a new one?

2. There’s SO MUCH more potential with angst- Frank being afraid of Leo bc of his fire, Leo being afraid of Frank because he’s twice his size and could easily crush his tiny body under his foot. Leo’s had to learn to survive on his brains and quick-wits in order to protect himself from bullies, and instantly gets defensive when he sees Frank. Frank is very insecure and sensitive, so immediately falls victim to Leo’s jokes. It takes a while for both of them to take those walls down, put aside their differences, and learn to trust each other.

3. It’s just hilarious how got-off-on-the-wrong-foot they were. A reminder that when Frank first met Leo, Leo had just destroyed half of New Rome. They both immediately judged each other completely based on looks- like it’s seriously funny how much you could compare these two to “Pride and Prejudice”. Also, the awkward misunderstanding that was the whole Sammy thing-

4. But they also have a lot more in common that Leo and Calypso ever did- similar trauma with losing their moms, and actually Leo is just as afraid of fire as Frank is. Both are incredibly insecure, and they both feel like they don’t belong among the other Seven.

5. You’ve also got that fun opposites-attract thing- Frank is big and muscular, Leo is built like a twig. Frank is big soft pookie bear, Leo is an absolute menace to society. Frank can turn into animals, Leo is a machines guy. Frank is Roman, Leo is Greek. You get the idea. They were written to juxtapose each other beautifully. They are the Yin to each other’s Yang.

6. They get so much more time together to establish a meaningful relationship. Their arc carries over three books, and we get to form connections as a reader to BOTH Leo AND Frank separately beforehand, so the payoff is a lot more satisfying. It takes time for them to open up to each other, and when they do it feels like they earned it. Calypso and Leo got a couple of chapters, that’s it.

It doesn’t have to be romantic! Leo can heal his trauma with friends and found family, learning to love and accept himself, learning that he doesn’t actually need the attention of a hot girl to be valid. He can find his place among his brethren with the help of all his friends, even Frank- the most unlikely of friends.

I wish Rick had put more effort into fleshing out the platonic relationships instead of just conforming to romance-centric ideals of “love fixes everything!” It’s lazy, and boring, and has been done to death. Platonic friendships make up 95% of our relationships, yet they are SERIOUSLY underrepresented in media. I’m calling for more interesting platonic dynamics. Leo and Frank could’ve been so much more, if Rick had actually taken the time to build on their relationship, and focused less on “Leo Needs a Girlfriend”!

So, when I say “Everything Caleo did, Valzhang could do better”- THAT is what I meant.

Also, Jason is so much better for Leo than Calypso, but that’s a whole other post.

[Edit: And I have made that post! You can find it here]

[ohhicas]

I love your Aristocat OCs and I was hoping to learn more about Faure's stepdad, Mr. Abraham DeLacey Giuseppe Casey Thomas O'Malley the Alley Cat? He's my favorite from that movie.

For TwstOC purposes, he just goes by Roman! [Other names may exist among those he's Dealt With but, to his wife & the kids, it's just Roman]

A lot of what is "known" about him in the OC-verse is kind of a "well, so I heard," thing, since he's spoken of through the lens of the kids.

Some quick stuff:

He's Completely magicless, and relies on physical strength and "things he learned from his friends on the street, if you can read me." Magic is kind of a 'oh damn!' thing; he's still learning to get used to it as a positive thing since meeting his now-wife. When you grow up magicless, there's a little bit of a bitter feeling, but seeing it in action finally at a personal level has really made him interested. The kittens surprise him near-daily with the things they can do (that he previously just sorta had to. 'Figure out'.)

He's got a lot of friends from his previous life, most of which still exist in his Current Life that the triplets know of as "uncles". While he says that life is behind him, he'd still (probably, with some small hesitation) go to jail to help the guys out.

He'd 100% go to jail without hesitation to protect Eva and the triplets. They may not be biological his, but those are His Kids. He's known them since they were wobbling around and chewing on his tail.

He won't give a straight answer if anyone asks how he and Eva met; he'll leave that one to her. But he will give a very poetic rambling about starlight and The Moment and like finding his soul wandering into his arms until he's gently chided and told to stop.

[ ^- this one is old art ]

There aren't enough words for how in love with Eva he is. They are absolutely That Couple. Honey & Darling have nothing on them. He'd throw himself in front of a moving vehicle if she asked. He'd tear down the world if anything happened to her (or the kids). He'd fight until there was nothing left of him and then still find the strength to keep going should someone hurt one hair on her fluffy head. She thinks his devotion is Quite Charming, and politely requests he not go throwing himself in front of any vehicles on Her Watch, thank you.

Emile (toulouse kitten) looks to him like a role model, and even started taking boxing up as a hobby to try to be closer to him. Faure is fascinated by how many friends and connections he has, and strives to be able to go "Oh, I have a guy for that!" like how Roman can. Antonia thinks of Roman as the 'perfect man', and if any boy interested in her isn't as in love with her as he is with her mom, then she wants no part of it. Roman is forever thankful these kids accepted him so readily as Stepdad, even before he and Eva were married.

[ He was absolutely in a gang before, and while not a pusher, he Was a brawler. He's not super proud of that life, but he wouldn't trade the experiences for anything. He was just freshly 'free' of it and trying to find his next gig when Eva happened into his life. ]

[lilislegacy]

do you think percy and annabeths kids would ever have to put up with big expectations from the kids at chb and the gods who have heard of and seen the things that their parents have done? i can totally see chiron unintentionally pressuring them by comparing them to percy and annabeth all the time. and kids at chb staring at them every time a campfire story or song about them did. everyone always talk about the fluff side of it, but I want to hear your opinion on the angst side of it.

thanks for the ask @helpallthenamesaretakenblog!

yes, i think they do in some ways, but i think it goes way deeper than that

the thing is, unlike at camp jupiter, kids of demigods aren’t really a thing at camp half blood. i think that’s something that changes after the camps become friendly, but i still think it takes a long time for greeks to actually send their kids there. the reason being at camp jupiter, demigods (parents) actually live nearby, in new rome, and their kids just have to serve their time, train in a unit, and then they get to go to college and stuff. but at camp half blood, you are sending your child off to train as an individual warrior and potentially be sent on a deadly quest. camp half blood is brutal, even though it may appear as the more juvenile setting of the two camps.

i also think the romans have way more kids, given they are way less likely to die. they get to comfortably settle down in new rome. personally, i think greek demigods having kids is rare. even if they live long enough, they don’t want to bring kids into the world, risking them attracting monsters. which is why i think percy and annabeth wanting children - and wanting them so badly, even at the height of being miserable teenage demigods - is so beautiful and incredible. it’s such a beautiful bright light of hope in all the darkness of the demigod world (which is why it makes me sad when people think they won’t want children 😭). i don’t think most of their friends will have kids, tbh. so percy and annabeth’s kids would probably be amongst only a handful of other legacies.

there’s also the matter of where do they go? are there special cabins for legacies? or do they go to their grandparents’s cabin? and if so, if they have two godly grandparents, how is it decided which one they go to? either way, they are gonna feel like they don’t fit in at first.

even though percy and annabeth are famous demigods, i still think their kids’ presence at camp half blood would result in many campers who are like “why are they here? they’re not even kids of gods.” so i think they would need to really prove themselves. and once they do prove themselves worthy of being trained alongside demigods (cause you know they will) THEN there’s gonna be that expectation of “are they as good as their parents?”

and the thing is, no, they won’t be as powerful as percy. and no, they won’t be as intelligent as annabeth. but the combination of being raised by percy and annabeth + having water powers + being intelligent + being amazing fighters, will make them incredible. they will probably even be better than many demigods. not necessarily in raw power (though even if they’re half as powerful as percy, that’s more powerful than most demigods) but simply by being extremely well rounded.

and yes, there will probably be a lot of instances where people won’t leave them alone because they just want stories of their parents, but tbh, i think their kids only know some stuff. i think there will be more instances of them hearing stories about their parents from other people. like someone going “is it true that your dad slayed a giant with the head of a statue” and their kids being like “uhh idk, did he?” like the campfire stories about them bit you mentioned, i think most of the time everyone would be staring the kids, in awe of their parents, but the kids would also be like “damn that’s crazy. i can’t believe mom and dad did that. i gotta ask them for details.” 😂

and chiron will absolutely be very tough on them. he’s not gonna go easy on them. at all. but it’s not because he expects them to be their parents. it’s because he cares for them, and he knows percy and annabeth raised them to have great strength and perseverance. (and percy and annabeth definitely will tell chiron “do not go easy on them.”they want their kids to know how to fucking survive).

it’s not gonna be easy, but they will be extraordinary. i personally think percy and annabeth would have 3-4 kids, and they are all gonna be witty and smart and extremely talented warriors, but they are also all gonna be different from each other. i like to think they have a lot of their parents in them, but they also are their own people. i think it’s gonna take a minute for them to feel like they belong at camp, especially the oldest, but like their parents, they will find a way and they will be incredible.

anyway, sorry i rambled there. maybe i’ll make a more organized post about this one day. but those are my immediate thoughts

[kingkat12]

Can I ask you what Roman Godfrey is like? I've never seen the series he plays in and I wanna read your roman fics cause I love your writing style 💕 (only read your Eric fics which I know the character and which I absolutely fucking love!!!!!)

OH THE WAY I SQUEEEEEALED

hey you, thank you so so much for this sweet message, u got me so excited omg😭🌸

so, how do i even begin.... uhm??

SOOOO, Roman Godfrey is a HOT rich playboy guy in high school (18, don't worry), and i have sort of taken it as my mission to write him as accurately to the show as possible... because at the end of the day, he's a guy, not a God💀 he's quite an asshole, he doesn't rlly know how to properly communicate (because BOYS, duh), but his humour is just so top-tier i cannot😭

basically, Roman is a guy from this town called Hemlock Grove. his family got very rich from doing something business-y (don't remember the details), but his dad died by suicide when Roman was quite young and his mom is a upir (a vampire, basically).

so, Roman is basically the school's playboy and he has quite fucked up family relations, and he spends all of season one trying to figure out wtf is wrong w him. he has some blood urges, he doesn't know he's a upir yet, and he's a bit of a loner because he's intimidating af💀 but he's always fucking some random chicks and he rlly thinks he's the shit (which he is, purr)

in the series, he becomes bffs with this guy Peter Rumancek and they try to figure out a mystery about a werewolf (which they call a vargulf) and it's all very bloody and weird........ and there are some sad stories involving his very very kind and sweet cousin, Letha, but i won't spoil it!! and he's also so nice to his sister, Shelley, ughhh warms my heart

at the end of the day, he just wants to have friends and for there to be someone that understands him:( he's super loyal, and when he cares for u he's ready to sacrifice everything for u, and ughhhh he's pure at heart:(

but to get to the bottom of this, Bill Skarsgård was just so FANTASTICALLY GORGEOUS in the midst of the chaos that is Hemlock Grove, 15 year old me went absolutely nuts!!!! so fast forward almost 4 years later, look where i am...... lol.

i will add a few gifs of him here because ugh he's too hot, i can't properly explain it

and this last one makes me feral AWGRRHRHHHH

hope this was an okay explanation, and hope you want to read the Roman fics!!! thank you once again!!<33

[pain-is-too-tired]

if you could rewrite the burning maze to give leo and jason the chance to see each other again (either before he dies or as a Jason lives au) how do you think it’d go? i imagine a lot of tears. less than canon but- yeah 😭😭

in a perfect world all three of them, like the og trio, would get to grow old together and learn about their place in the world and with each other. they’d never be alone. i’m sad now

If before Jason dies,I say before the head up to the ship or so, think Jason would definitely try hard to avoid Leo learning about him being told that either he or Piper was gonna die.

Cause Jason knows Leo will(and has) sacrifice for both him and Piper. He's not gonna have Leo put his life on the line again.

Also,Jason wouldn't express seeing Leo alive again with frustrated relief like what most everyone else does in TOA(the punch line was funny but gods I wanted some more emotional scenes from especially his siblings. But that's a different rant fhdh)

Jason gonna probably hug Leo still he's almost bruised tho. My boys a hugger.

Jason later dying tho would still absolutely wreck Leo. He's back with him just for him to be taken.

Now in Jason lives au?(hes saved last minute or Apollo manages to reawaken healing ability in some fashion in the moment) After everything settles and such Leo definitely gonna spend lot of time making up for lost time(as much as Leo getting two moms and such is sweet,Leo just not going back to camp or being seen with Piper again bugs me to no end. But again. Rant for another time dhdb)

Maybe during the time him and Calypso realize "Yeah we're better off as friends" and such so Leo gets even more room to catch up.

Maybe he goes to the same school as Jason or something(or Jason's moves to go to a school Leo's going to that fits him better or something-)

Leo maybe helps him with building temples and honorary places for the minor gods. Jason quickly realizing that it didn't matter if he was greek or roman,his home was where those he loved were and Leo helping him find his place.

I don't think(in terms of Valgrace) that they would(nor should) figure out they like eachother quickly. Probably takes a year or so before they even consider they feel that way. They're too focused on having their best friend back. Any other feelings aren't really noticed until everything settles again.

They're attached at the hip tho. Both almost dying/dying for a moment really causes some attachment issues fbdbd Piper teases them all the time but she's just as happy that both of them are still alive.

When they do start figuring out that they might have a crush,either both go to Piper or Jason goes to Piper and Leo goes to Jake cause he thinks it might be awkward to tell one of your best friends that you might have a crush on your other best friend who's also her ex-

Either way,even when they do start dating not much changes. But they now go on double dates with Piper and Shel and Will and Nico ✨️

[shslbunnylover]

★★★𝘽𝙖𝙗𝙮 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙘𝙤𝙡𝙙 𝙤𝙪𝙩𝙨𝙞𝙙𝙚 (12 𝙙𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙁𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛𝙢𝙖𝙨 𝘿𝙖𝙮 11: 𝙎𝙣𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙙 𝙞𝙣)★★★

Character: Alcina Dimitrescu

Taglist: @inlovewithgreta @lilfartbox1 (Message me to be a part of the taglist until I get a page set up!!)

Trigger warnings (DL, DI): N/a

Genre: Fluff

A/n: I never liked this song, so here's my spin on it <3

Word count: 1.1k

...

...

You groaned, rubbing the bridge of your nose as you tried to open the main exit of the castle despite knowing that it was blocked by snow. Continuing to pull the handle, you fell back, your ass hitting the cold marble floor and electing a grunt from you.

"Damn it-" You grumbled, dusting off your uniform as you stood up. "It's not even budging," You sighed, placing your bag on the floor as you texted your friends an apology.

"Hm?" Alcina looked up from her book, her golden eyes following you from her sight in the living room where she sat with the rest of her daughters, who were all doing their separate activities. "Bela, go check up on them," She ordered, watching her oldest daughter run up to you to interrogate.

"Y/n?" Bela tapped you on the shoulder, looking down at you with curiosity. "What's wrong?"

"Oh- Miss Bela, it's nothing. I'm just unable to get out, I think we're snowed in," You smiled.

Alcina, who was overhearing the conversation, stood up swiftly and made her way to you.

"Is that so?" Her Romanian accent filled your ears as you felt the light around you be blocked out by her large figure. "Did you have somewhere you needed to be?"

You laughed nervously, nodding.

"Yes, I did. I informed my friends I was stuck though," You spoke, tilting your head up to look at the maiden. "I can find a hotel if you wouldn't mind me escaping out a window?"

The older woman furrowed her eyebrows, licking her lips slowly as if she was looking as if she was observing her next dinner.

"No," She spoke loudly, causing a shiver to go straight down your spine. "You will stay right here, in your quarters. I'm not allowing you to stay in a place of unfamiliarity for the holidays,"

You blushed softly, waving your hands in front of you.

"Please My Lady, I'll be alright!" You attempted to assure her, only to be met with more refusal.

"Absolutely not. It is freezing outside, and even though you may be human, I'm not letting you get frozen out there," The golden-eyed woman commanded, extending her claws to tap the floor below her. "You will stay right here,"

You whimpered, not wanting to defy her.

"Yes, My Lady, I'll return to my room," You nodded, picking up your bag and walking out toward the hallway where your room resided.

Once you had finally left, Alcina turned to Bela.

"Bela, make them some hot cocoa and invite them out here," She spoke.

"Mom, you're the one in love with them, you have to make the moves," The blonde squeezed her mother's hand before returning to her book in the living room.

You weren't sure why your room was bigger than the other maids, but you didn't mind the extra space. Your room was beautifully decorated, illuminated with golden candles, and dressed in a Roman Gothic style.

The walls had been lined with intricate wall hangings that were a mix of red and black, with golden flourishes at the corners. The curtains had been thick and dark crimson velvet, the floors had been mahogany and well polished until they shone. A large bed dominated the room, with two heavy dark wood tables and desks on either side, lined with books and scrolls. Across from the bed had been a large desk, the same dark wood as the tables. A large desk lamp had been sat on the desk, with a large mirror leaning against the wall nearby.

A sudden knock came from the door, pausing your movements of putting away your belongings.

"Y/n?" Alcina's voice said, slightly muffled by the large door blocking you two.

"Oh! My Lady, please come in!" You replied, smiling as the vampire made her presence apparent in your room.

"Would you like to come and sit with me? I'd hate for you to be alone," The black-haired lady smiled.

You paused, was the woman you loved inviting you to be with her?

"O-Of course," You chuckled nervously, your tone way too breathy and lovesick for your liking.

"Good, meet me out there in 30,"

After you had returned your belongings to your room, you exited out towards the living room. The walls of the room had been lined with darkly stained panels, painted in a warm, deep shade of red, and decorated with intricate golden details. The floor was mahogany, polished until it shone, even in the dim light of the candles that decorated the center of the room. Across the way, a long table was covered in a rich and expensive velvet couch, and a pair of armchairs. A heavy wooden shelf was mounted on the rear wall, lined with darkly tinted glass bottles, and filled with rare and expensive wines.

"My Lady?" You asked Alcina, slightly startling her.

"Oh! Y/n, Draga Mea, please sit," Alcina gestured to the empty spot next to her.

You nodded, sitting down next to her as you pulled up a book she had recommended to you a couple of months ago.

"Ah, I see you're finally reading it," The vampire smiled, wrapping her arm around your waist and pulling you against her, leaving you red-faced.

"Yes, I've been meaning to," You replied, flipping a page.

Alcina remained silent, watching your every move with her sharp golden eyes with a pink tint forming on her otherwise pale skin.

You felt safe around the lady, you felt as if all your worries were gone, and you felt...warm. You weren't sure how to say it, but something inside you said that you didn't need to, and that she already knew.

"Merry Christmas Draga Mea," The vampire squeezed your side.

"Merry Christmas My lady," You smiled.

"You know I have a surprise for you,"

"What is it?" You asked, eyes falling mainly to your feet as you were to embarrassed to look anywhere else.

Alcina pulled you in for a soft and sweet kiss, her hands finding their way to your cheeks.

"I love you," Alcina confessed with a soft and weak smile, a chuckle escaping her lips as you blush.

"My Lady...I love you too," You replied with a breathy and shaky voice, looking up at her in both shock and love.

"Alcina," She corrected you,

"Huh?"

"Call me Alcina," The taller woman pecked you softly on your lips. "After all, if we love each other that much, we should be on a first-name basis. Right?"

You nodded, laying your head on her shoulder as she hoisted you up on her lap.

Maybe being stuck in a castle for the holidays wasn't so bad after all...

...

If you enjoyed reading this, don't forget to like, reblog and comment! Thank you and you are loved <3

-Akira

[peggy-sue-reads-a-book]

Ok, kids (e.g. miserable and traumatized adults) I’m going to level with you real quick. “Suffering for Christ is fun!” And “the heart is deceitful above all things” are fucking dogwhistles and the absolute basis of fundie brainwashing. Right, ok, watch this:

A list of Bible verses intended to encourage folks under violent persecution under Nero are cherry picked to make you feel guilty for whatever way religious control isn’t fun for you. Christ can handle Roman torture so you can surely handle _______.

Now you feel bad about, say, your massively gay longings, because repressing them can’t possibly be as awful as Jesus’s death.

Which by the way was your fault.

If that sounds wrong, it’s because your judgement can’t be trusted.

In fact, it’s a privilege to be unhappy because Jesus was unhappy, and we wanna be like Jesus.

Also you killed god sooooo 👉👈

DO YOU SEE THE PIPELINE? Do you fucking see it?? Read it again if you’re not sure.

Ok, guess what else:

Jesus wasn’t unhappy. They called him a drunk and a glutton because he was so lit at his friends’ weddings.

Canonically, jesus had a lot of sex worker friends and you don’t hear him giving them shit. All his dialogue is in red btw, it’s pretty easy to find.

Jesus spent a lot of time with groups excluded by previous dogma and repeatedly let his disciples blow off textual rules when it better served those around them in their present context.

He’s really pretty emphatic about food security and healthcare. As in bending the laws of physics to get lunch for strangers and cure them of weird diseases. It’s pretty neat.

I don’t know or care who Jesus Christ is to you, but I’m just gonna set the record straight that he was killed in a rough way after hoofing it around the Middle East with his twelve weird friends and some hoes. Do and think what you want but for the love of God, don’t let a mofo in front of a praise band use my guy to guilt trip you out of basic happiness and humanity.

Anyway, I am a Christian adult. This is what I and plenty of other Christian adults believe. I have 0 desire to control you or your relationships, I do not believe in hell, much less that you, precious beloved child, are going there. I am shouting at you hopefully over anyone who tells you that you are not enough and you deserve the pain you are in.

I love you so much. I wish you joy and nonviolence and authenticity. I wish you healthy food and cool tattoos. I wish you someone to love and loyal friends and an acceptance and a dope fucking jacket. I love you so much. Please be free, glorious, beautiful creature. It’s ok to be happy.

I might not be your mom but I am a mom. For what it’s worth, you deserve the world exactly as you are. If someone else disagrees, fuck that guy. Literally fuck that guy.

Palestine is being bombed the shit out of and the Orange One is running again. These are bad times. My blog is a safe space for you.

If it would feel nice to have someone pray for you, you can always reach out because I will 100% not condemn or pressure you to be any kind of way you’re not. You’re ok, dude.

[mariacallous]

Last year, I hosted my biggest Rosh Hashanah dinner ever. My boyfriend and I invited about 15 friends over to our one-bedroom Brooklyn apartment, moved all of our furniture into the bedroom, rented a couple of folding tables and chairs, and turned the living room into a Rosh Hashanah dreamscape, complete with thematic streamers, ambient lighting, and candles. I whipped up four round challahs, a vat of vegetarian matzah ball soup, my mom’s famous cornflake kugel, some baked chicken, and a batch of spiked apple cider.

It was a lot of work, but absolutely worth it: I’m always sad when I can’t be with my family in Chicago during the High Holidays, but being surrounded by friends, some Jewish, some not, to celebrate Rosh Hashanah with food and drink was a warm, wonderful way to ring in the New Year.

But this year? Nah. I’m going with a pizza.

Of course we won’t be hosting another Rosh Hashanah dinner this year for the very obvious reason of a global pandemic. I know we could still make a special meal for the two of us with all the standard trappings that I grew up eating at my mother’s holiday table, but when I think about the work that that requires, and how exhausted I’ve been from merely existing in this current world, I just… kind of… don’t want to. I still want to mark the day as special, and I love the idea of eating symbolic foods on Rosh Hashanah, but I don’t want to spend an entire day cooking, and I certainly don’t want to spend an entire night washing dishes.

Which brings me to pizza, which I will henceforth argue is the perfect — and yes, symbolic — Rosh Hashanah food.

Why should pizza be considered a Rosh Hashanah food? Let’s dive in.

1. It’s round. Traditionally on Rosh Hashanah, instead of braiding challah into a traditional loaf, Jews bake their challah in a round shape to represent the circularity of the calendar and the never-ending cycle of life. You know what else is round? Yup, it’s pizza. Pizza might not be traditionally round for symbolic reasons, but it does allow for easy slicing and sharing, and sharing your food with others seems like a nice Jewish thing to do, no? And I’m not gonna lie: When I stare into a beautiful pizza pie, I see the entire universe staring back at me in all of its cheesy, saucy goodness.

2. It’s *possibly* a Jewish invention. Most people assume pizza came from Italy, but the cheesy delicacy actually has quite a complicated and debated history, with some even believing that the ancient Jewish philosopher Maimonides first coined the word. As Henry Abramson wrote in JTA, Yehuda Romano, a 14th-century Hebrew scholar from Italy, “translated Maimonides’ use of the word ‘hararah’ (a type of flatbread) in the Mishneh Torah with four simple Hebrew letters: peh, yud, tzadi and heh, or ‘pizza,’ arguably the very first time the word was ever used in any language.” In the “History of pizza” page on Wikipedia (a wonderful read if you’ve got the time), it’s noted that, “Some commentators have suggested that the origins of modern pizza can be traced to pizzarelle, which were kosher for Passover cookies eaten by Roman Jews after returning from the synagogue on that holiday, though some also trace its origins to other Italian paschal breads. Abba Eban has suggested that modern pizza ‘was first made more than 2000 years ago when Roman soldiers added cheese and olive oil to matzah.'” Look: I don’t know if Jews really invented pizza, but the chance that our people have been eating it for thousands of years is reason enough for me to order a fresh pie this Rosh Hashanah.

3. It goes well with honey. Honey is a traditional Rosh Hashanah food that represents the sweet New Year. Have you ever put honey on a pizza? What about hot honey? Just do it. Trust me. Moving on.

4. It’s already kind of a New Year’s food. Is it really a New Year’s celebration if you didn’t order pizza at 1 a.m.? Yes, I’m talking about that other New Year’s Eve, but the logic still applies. Plus, if you go a little too hard on that sweet kosher wine, you’ll be very happy to have a fridge full of cold leftover pizza the next morning.

5. Its numerical value is pretty meaningful. Okay, I can’t take credit for this one, and it’s a little out there, but bear with me: My colleague Ben Sales pointed out that according to Gematria, the numerological system by which Hebrew letters correspond to numbers, the Hebrew numerical value of “pizza” (פיצה) is 185. This is also the numerical value of the phrase “אני לדודי ודודי לי” which translates to, “I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine,” which comes from a verse in the Song of Songs. This is kind of a slogan for Elul, the month leading up to the High Holidays. The idea is that this is a time period when we’re growing closer to God and vice versa. So let’s grow a little closer to pizza, too.

6. It’s just really good. I don’t know what else there is to say besides pizza is a perfect food, and why wouldn’t you want to start your New Year off with something so amazingly delicious? It’s been a tough year and we need comfort foods more than ever. We need takeout more than ever. We need to go easy on ourselves — and not add any unnecessary stress to our lives — more than ever!

If cooking up a storm on Rosh Hashanah makes you happy, then of course, you should go forth and do so. If you can’t imagine the High Holidays without some tzimmes and brisket, by all means, have at it. But if you’re looking for a way out of the norm during this very, very unusual year, I hereby grant you full permission to ditch the kitchen and call up your favorite local pizza place. Let them bring the party to you (and tip well!!). It’s just one of the many Jewish things to do.

[minimooberry]

{ i've never actually finished a legacy challenge before but I am ridiculously attached to my main save sims so hopefully I will this time 😭I'm going to be starting the barbie legacy challenge by @sims-himbo, modified to fit where we're at with gen 2 }

ok so actually speaking when i say modified i mean like, super modified. i genuinely cannot bring myself to name so many sims barbara guys 😓 but after mercedes has a kid i'll probably give them the middle name barbie (like trisha paytas' kid ☠🧍‍♀️) BUT, just so we have some backstory on everything thats going on right now, here's a recap.

DAPHNE MAE CASTRO is the fourth and last child of Emilie and Jonah Castro, my gen 1 sims. She's clumsy, loves the outdoors, a romantic, unforgettable, and wants to be a housewife. Take care of her garden, her daughter, and live a nice, happy, life. TAKING AFTER HER OLDER BROTHER ROMAN, she is also a little too romantic. In fact she is so flirty that she ends up in really, really awkward situations. Like when she kissed her best friend Ciara at prom and then ran away which started an argument that ended with her crying in the shower at home. TO GET OVER THIS ABSOLUTELY HORRIFIC EXPERIENCE, she gets wasted at a party and ends up hooking up with two boys, Nicolas and Rafael, in the same night (not at the same time 🙏😭). They actually end up hitting it off really well and she became FWB with both of them. She just... didn't tell them that she was sleeping with someone else. THIS PROVES TO BE A GENUINELY TERRIBLE DECISION when she finds out that she is not only pregnant, but she also doesn't know who the father is. If it isn't the consequences of her actions 😋 THE SITUATION IS BAD ALREADY BUT IT GETS A 100 TIMES WORSE when she finds out that they are in fact, twin brothers. Rafael and Nicolas Blaze, born out of a summer romance between a wealthy business man and a lower class girl, are both definitely horrified that they've been sleeping with the same girl, but also horrified that she is pregnant! STILL NOT KNOWING WHO THE FATHER IS, they're both equally as involved in her pregnancy, even helping her move out into a little trailer. Family is family either way and Daphne is still their... friend? Whatever, we don't get into their convoluted feelings for the sake of the baby. MERCEDES ELEANORA BLAZE is born healthy and reasonably happy to a single teen mom who is trying her best to not fuck up again. She's healing from the absolute shit show that was her pregnancy, but at least Rafael and Nicolas are involved. And hey, she can find out who the father really is now.

AND THAT'S WHERE WE ARE RIGHT NOW!!! Daphne recently aged up into a young adult and Mercedes into a toddler 💗💗

previous // next

[hasanawolf]

How do you characterise the other neighbours except for Francis, Izaack, Angus, Mia and Afton. We’ll eventually know about Nacha soon but what about the other neighbours?

Like, their personalities? Mmmm, let’s see 🤔

Starting from the first floor - up:

Roman: A tad serious, he doesn’t have the friendliest expression most of the time, but he’s a good man, very polite, and loves and treasures his wife Lois.

Lois: Big Mom Vibes, she’s super sweet, loving and caring. She loves baking cookies for the people she cares about. She also loves to pampering Roman.

Albertsky: Also serious, but not as “friendly” as Roman. Speaks in a rather harsher tone, for which he can come off as rude sometimes. Mostly keeps to himself, but loosens up a bit during neighbors parties or so.

Robertsky: A bit entitled, looks down on people a lot, claiming that he’s smarter, or better looking, or more successful or so. Likes to buy expensive clothes or watches to show off, but all of this is because deep inside he’s very insecure. He has a crush on Nacha, and resents Francis because he is sure him and Nacha had something (he’s one of the few neighbors that actually connects Anastacha to Francis, he believes he’s her father).

Selenne and Elenois: I’ll confess I haven’t given them too much though, don’t know yet if they’ll have different personalities or the same. But I kinda imagine them being like those twin sisters that split one sentence between the two of them, or say the same thing at the same time. They’re very smart and intuitive, but they’re mostly observers. Don’t gossip a lot. They pinpointed that Izaack was gay even before he met Francis.

Arnold: Very friendly, super chill and smiley. Big Dad Vibes. Loves to listen to people and gives amazing advices. Also very encouraging. You’ll see, I have a little comic planned with him.

Gloria: More serious but very sweet, very lady-like and exceedingly smart. Likes to treat herself and her husband to some luxuries from time to time, but doesn’t over spend.

Margarette: Life of the party, MASSIVE sweetheart, friends with EVERYONE, no enemies, loves to make people smile, always sees the positive side of things, walking ray of sunshine ☀️

Nacha: She’s friendly overall, like, she gets along pretty well with the other neighbors. But she can be… how to say it… She likes things to be done her way, (for which she collides with Anastacha a bit, as she’s starting her rebel years), and she has that “I always get what I want” mentality. Gets along well with Mia as she’s Tacha’s teacher, and has sort of a mother-daughter relationship with Margarette. Margarette was the first one she told she was pregnant.

Anastacha: Mini female Francis basically 😂😂 Very serious, not very friendly, a bit of a loner, does whatever she wants, BUT she is nice towards the people who don’t think of her as a brat and are nice to her. Reason why she likes Francis so much, Francis treats her with the utmost respect, and validates her thoughts, opinions and emotions. She also really likes Margarette, Izaack, Lois, Steven and Mia (even though she doesn’t show it much because she’s her teacher)

Mclooy: Loony old man 🤣 Jk, he’s not loony, but he will always be telling you about the CRAZY amazing adventures he used to go to when he was younger, though no one ever knows if his stories are true or not. Very smiley, extremely friendly, a bit of a jokester, coughs like an old dog. He gets along really well with Margarette.

Steven: Takes after his old man in the way that he is also a bit of a jokester. He’s pump and a bit of a dude bro 🤙🏻. He loves working out and being active. Also is super friendly when in relaxed situations, but can go ABSOLUTE serious mode during rough times. He plays guitar and loves to sing. Has been friends with Afton for a really long time and secretly has romantic feelings for him. (The other neighbor that believes Tacha is Francis’ daughter).

Rafttellyn: Gossip Queen. She knows everyone’s dirty laundry because her husband Alf tells her who’s got legal problems and why. Gossips with Margarette and Lois, her BFFs. Has a special bond with Lois because in my AU (and I guess it’s also my headcanon haha) Roman is her brother. Ccccccaaaaaannnn be a bit snooty sometimes.

Alf: A Queen needs her King huh? 🤣 He’s a little more discreet than Raft, but he will whisper something about you if he knows you’ve got dirt. But in general he’s nicer and jolly.

[starlocked01]

Your Average Petty Sinner

AO3 link (pending)

Summary- Patton goes through an Emo phase and decides to hang out with the most notorious kids at school, going so far as to try to date their leader.

Relationships- Janus&Patton (Moceit), Remus/Virgil (Dukexiety)

Word Count- 5.4k

Content Warnings- swearing, mild description of injury, mild sexual innuendos

This is my @sanderssidesgiftxchange gift for @lily-janus 💛💙 I really hope you like it! Also a shout out to @infinitesimal-dna for beta reading and putting up with my shenanigans.

“I just don't get it!” Patton frantically paced the small patch of faded pale blue carpet that was visible in his cluttered room, “I literally caught them with cigarettes and lighters in the bathroom- how did they weasel out of detention this time?”

Roman barely looked up from the script in his hand as he lounged on Patton’s bed, “I don't know. Remus didn't say when Mom picked us up. They weren't going to hurt anyone but themselves.”

“Lighters start fires- they could have caused a fire alarm and some freshman could have been trampled in the ensuing panic while the science wing burned down-” Patton whipped back to face Roman who remained unperturbed. 

“And none of that happened. You saved the day, Padre. Why can't you just be happy about that?”

“Because they didn't get in trouble!” Patton crossed his arms tight over his chest and resumed his pacing, “why turn in the bad kids if they're just going to be let go?”

“Sounds like you want to put my brother in jail,” Roman snickered and briefly looked up, “I don't know why. Why do you snitch on them?” Roman countered

Patton bit down hard on his lip before taking a measured breath, “I am not snitching. They just keep breaking the rules in front of me.”

“I think you just want Janus to notice you. Trust me, he does, sweetie. Remus won't stop complaining about how much the goodie two shoes need to fu- leave them alone,” Roman replies, remembering too late the household ban on swears.

“SHH! Don’t let Mom hear you.” Patton whispered tersely, “you’re wrong. I don’t care what any of them think about me– especially not Janus.”

Roman snorted, “Yeah, right. That’s why you’re constantly tattling on him. Didn’t anyone ever tell you that when a boy’s mean to you that means he likes you?”

Patton stopped in his tracks and turned back to face Roman, “That’s… completely untrue.”

Roman rolled his eyes, flipping a page lazily, “Just keep telling yourself that, Padre. I bet if you just asked he’d go out with you.”

“I’m not gay and I don’t want to go out with him,” Patton countered, “will you please just be quiet? My mom would kick you out in two seconds for being a quote ‘bad influence’ if she heard you right now.”

“Mmm fine. Alright. I won’t talk about your obvious crush on Mr. Tall, Dark and Mysterious.”

“I am not- Why don’t you understand that not everyone has to like guys?” 

Roman sat up, “I’m not saying everyone. I just know you, Patt. You don’t like girls. You’ve turned down like twenty of them since homecoming last year. So if you don’t like girls, that just leaves guys. I know you don’t feel comfortable bringing a bf home because of the witch, but you’ve at least got to let yourself consider the possibility.”

“Maybe I just haven’t met the right girl,” Patton replied, not sounding as convincing as he should have to shut down the conversation.

Roman chuckled, “sure. Because she’s actually a boy named Janus and you’re looking in the wrong places.”

“Roman!”

“Just ask him!”

“He hates me. And I don’t like him.”

“You absolutely fucking do!”

“Roman!” Patton hissed, flinching as he could hear his mother’s footsteps coming down the hallway. “Now you’ve done it-” he muttered as the bedroom door clicked and swung open.

“Patton, sweetie. What’s our rule for having friends over?” his mother asked from the door, a falsely sweet and disarming voice cutting through the tension of the argument.

Patton turned, “they need to follow house rules and not distract from school work…”

“That’s right. If I’m not mistaken, I believe I heard Mr. Prince here swearing. That is no way to speak to others, is it?” 

“No, ma’am,” Patton replied, head hung in defeat. 

She turned towards Roman, “Exactly. I’m sorry dear, but you need to leave and reevaluate your vocabulary and manners if you want to spend time with my son.”

“Sorry, Patt,” Roman murmured as he grabbed his backpack and walked past to leave, “tomorrow. Just do it.” 

Patton sighed with exasperation, “Please, Mom, let him stay? He didn’t mean to-”

“You know the rules, Patton. I think it’s about time you got started on your homework,” she brushed him off, escorting Roman out to the front door. 

Patton waited until he heard the front door shutting before closing his bedroom door to get started on his work, trying to tune out his racing thoughts about school. 

___ ___ ___

 Janus slumped against the lockers, ignoring the dirty look from Susan next to him when he accidentally shut hers for her. It wasn’t his fault her locker was so close to Virgil’s. He gripped the head of his cane to keep it from sliding into the throng of students that would trample and crack it without a second thought. The polished wooden cane had cost a fortune, stained black with a yellow snake carved around the shaft up to the handle. He'd refused to adopt a medical-looking metal bully magnet and protected his aide fiercely. Janus silently watched Virgil picking out text books for the next class.

“What a bitch, right?” he asked once Virgil had noticed him. 

Virgil nodded sagely, “Yeah. Who’re we talking about this time?”

Janus smirked, “Mrs. Hansen, of course. It’s like she doesn’t even care that I don’t give a fuck about Physics.”

“She held you after class again? That bitch!” Virgil gaped, closing his locker, “that is so messed up. You should tell the VP that she’s not respecting your accommodations, right?”

“Like he ever cared the twenty thousand other times someone tried to make life harder,” Janus scoffed, glancing at the disturbance coming down the hallway and opting not to warn Virgil.

With all the subtlety of a tornado, Janus watched as Remus pinned Virgil to the lockers, dropping his backpack at Janus’ feet in his hurry to get hands on the boy. Virgil grunted in surprise, pushing back against the attack until he recognized the lips pressed harshly into his neck.

“Rem-! Oh my god!” Virgil laughed breathlessly, “I told you not at school, motherfucker!”

Remus looked up with a devious grin, “and? Your mother said she loved it.”

“Gross,” Virgil chuckled and pulled his boyfriend into a tight hug, “I missed you.”

Janus rolled his eyes, pushing the discarded backpack away with the tip of his cane, “It’s been all of an hour since you two last molested each other in front of the entire school.”

“Jealous, Jannie?”

“Utterly green with envy,” Janus sighed, noticing the crowd in the hall thinning rapidly, “are you done playing tongue hockey yet?”

“Never,” Remus laughed and turned back to Virgil, cutting off his protests with a filthy kiss.

“I’m honestly surprised you haven’t figured out how to make gay love babies yet,” Janus replied, carefully readjusting his treasured suede gloves. The crowds of students dissipated and doors shut as the bell for the next period rang through the now empty halls.

Janus nudged the pair, “Biology will have to wait. Let's get going.”

“Oh come on!” Remus whined, “just tell Mr. Sawan you got held back and we're helping you-”

“It's not a lie for once,” Virgil added, leaning down to grab Remus' bag.

“And they say I'm the bad influence,” Janus scoffed, grabbing his cane to start towards class. Virgil and Remus reluctantly followed, careful to give him space to walk. 

Janus wasn't actually eager to get to class. Everyone always stared when he walked in late, despite arriving late by necessity every day. The scrutiny felt absolutely miserable. 

As they neared the stairs down to the mathematics wing, Janus paused to let the couple go first. The last thing he wanted was to slip all the way down into a concussion.

“Hey!” A voice called loudly from down the hall, “aren't you supposed to be in class?”

Janus glanced over and swore quietly at the sight of the world's most annoying goody two shoes coming towards them.

“Patton. Where do you think we're going?” He asked in a lazy drawl.

“Yeah, calm your tits,” Remus added less than helpfully.

Patton frowned, glancing down at his chest for a brief moment, “I don't have- the bell rang five minutes ago. You're supposed to be in class. I bet you're out here trying to smoke and ditch class.”

“How? You stole my lighter yesterday,” Virgil snarked back, arms crossed tightly over his chest.

“It’s against school policy-” Patton started.

“What's against policy is a student trying to police other students. I literally cannot walk the halls when everyone else is running around,” Janus spoke up, standing up straighter. “We'd have made it by now if you hadn't interrupted us.”

“You liar. You're just messing around to get out of class,” Patton accused, stepping closer as if to intimidate Janus.

He laughed, “we have this discussion once a week! If I didn't know better, I would think you're going out of your way to flirt with me.”

An inscrutable look passed over Patton’s face, freckles melting into a soft flustered blush. “I am not!” Patton whispered hoarsely.

“Then we'll just be on our way,” Janus sneered, starting down the first step, cane first.

“Hey!” Patton gasped, reaching for Janus’s shoulder. Janus flinched at the unexpected touch, shifting to toss Patton as far from him as possible.

Unfortunately, this sent the boy careening down the flight of stairs.

“Shit!” Janus exclaimed,  watching in horror and slight mesmerism as Patton came to a halt on the first landing.

“You killed him!” Remus cackled with glee at the possibility.

“Jan- what the fuck?” Virgil asked, not sure if he should move to help Patton or not.

Janus glanced down the hall, and seeing no one, made his decision.

“Virgil, help me get him to the nurse.” he instructed. “Remus, get to class and tell them Virgil and I cannot make it. Give as little context as possible, got it?”

Remus nodded and hurried to the class.

Janus hurried down the steps as fast as he could manage to the place Patton lay on the stairs.

“Wh- why?” Patton murmured, cradling his shoulder, “I- I wasn't-”

“Next time don't touch people without permission,” Janus snapped, reaching to pick  Patton up, “can you walk?”

“I- I think so?” Patton winced, trying to sit up with both of the others pulling him up, “d-don't pull my arm, please.”

Janus nodded, “right, let's go, before you die or something.”

“Good going, Jan,” Virgil groaned as Patton leaned more heavily against him.

“Shut it, Vi. I didn't do anything.”

The walk down the rest of the stairs and to the nurse's office felt impossibly long and arduous, as Patton moved slower than even Janus. And he moaned in pain at each jostle to his arm.

“You're going to be okay,” Virgil chewed at his cheek, “it wasn't that bad of a fall.”

“I- I hope so,” Patton murmured, “why are the bad kids helping me?”

Janus rolled his eyes, “who said we're bad?”

“I- you always get in trouble,” Patton tried to explain.

“Yeah. Because you're always trying to get us in trouble,” Virgil scoffed.

“I don't expect you to understand, Patton,” Janus stopped as they reached the nurse’s office, “ but sometimes people just don't think like you.”

Patton nodded then tried to walk into the office, “thanks, I guess.”

Janus rolled his eyes, turning to head back to class, only to be confronted with the imposing figure of the school vice principal.

“What's this, then?”

“Oh- sir, I can explain,” Janus offered hastily.

“You will,” the man nodded, pointing towards his office, “If you please, Mr. Shephard.”

Virgil fiddled with his sleeves, “It was completely an accident. We were just helping Patton.”

“He fell down the stairs after slipping on a spilled water bottle,” Janus protested, already tired of walking, “I think he hit his head so we didn't want to leave him alone before he could get over here.”

“I see,” the man eyed the two, “is that so?”

“Yes. That's what happened.” Janus nodded emphatically. He watched the disciplinarian's face to see if he bought the story.

“Get to your class,” the vice principal barked, and the two wasted no time disappearing down the hallway.

___ ___ ___

Patton stirred and sat gingerly up in bed. A needle of pain shot through his shoulder at the weight pressed on it. 

“Oh- f-”

“Patton!” His mother stood at the door to his room with a sour look on her face.

“I was going to say ‘fudge’,” Patton gritted his teeth.

“Honestly, when did I raise such a delinquent?” She shook her head and barged her way in, “bullying other students and now swearing? Certainly nothing I taught you.”

“Mom!”

“I won't hear it. Luckily, some of your classmates collected your homework assignments for you. Behave yourself with them,” she scolded.

“I'm not a bully,” Patton muttered, gazing up at the ceiling as though the stucco could offer him the strength to endure her accusations.

“For the record, no one said you were but her. I don’t know why she thinks that,” Patton looked back to the door sharply, finding his mother replaced with Virgil standing slouched against the frame, a book bag slung over one shoulder. “Hey- I hope it's okay I- let's not worry about how I knew your address. How… are.. you?”

“I've been better. The doctor poked and prodded me a lot yesterday.” 

“Yikes…”

Patton nods, “I’ll be back in school by Monday. Unless I go completely loopy in the head. But I think the sprain in my shoulder is worse. Is Janus okay?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. He was tired from all the running around but like.. I don’t think he’s mad at you, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Virgil glanced back to the door before leaning closer to ask, “is she always like that?”

Patton nodded, “yeah… that’s my mom for you.”

Virgil swung his bag onto the bed, “alright, well, I’ve got your homework for the classes you missed.. And I thought you might like some music to pass the time? It’s the kind I listen to when I get really upset,” Virgil explained with a pointed look as he pulled a disk in a clear cover out of the bag with the school books, “just.. Let me know what you think if you do. I’m really sorry about what happened.”

“It’s not your fault, Virge-” Patton shook his head and then winced, “thank you, though.”

“No worries. I- uh.. Look forward to seeing you..? Yeah. Get better soon.”

Patton watched as Virgil exited his bedroom, confused why he of any of the kids at school brought him make up work. He examined the CD, turning it to read the sharpie writing, a list of songs with artists listed in incomprehensible initials. He turned the case over, noticing a small piece of paper tucked under the CD inside the case. Intrigued, he pried the case open and popped the CD out, laying it on the blanket. He retrieved the small folded paper from his lap, carefully picking it apart. 

I didn’t push you down the stairs. I also did not try to help you after you tripped. If you tell anyone I did, I won’t hesitate to make you regret it. -J

Patton frowned, confused by the note. He tossed it aside and pulled out his portable CD player to listen to the mixtape without his mom listening in. He laid back, letting the beats and melodies wash over him. As he listened, an idea started to form, one of which he was barely conscious.

___ ___ ___

“Are you insane?” Roman stared far more openly than other students in the hall. Patton shrugged and pushed past his friend to his locker.

“I’m just trying something new,” Patton replied, hanging his backpack up and picking out books for the first class. He tried very hard to not express frustration when the bookbag caught on the spikes sticking out of one of his many new bracelets. 

“You look ridiculous. You hate black! What is going on?” 

“I can wear whatever I want, Ro. You sound like my mother right now.” 

That shut Roman’s protests up quickly. Patton hummed to himself, reaching into the bag to pull out a brand new makeup pallet made of browns and blacks, picking the darkest shade to dab onto his eyelids.

“How hard did you hit your head?” Roman asked, staring in even more shock and disbelief. 

“My head is fine, Roman. I told you I’m trying something new,” Patton explained.

“Oh Hey! When did you get hot, Pat-Pat?” Remus yelled, dragging Virgil behind him from down the hall.

“Woah- Patton, are you okay?” Virgil asked as they reached him and Roman at the lockers. 

“Looks like Jannie knocked some sense into him. Hot damn!” Remus leered, earning a smack on the shoulder from Virgil and Roman. 

“Guys, I am fine. I promise. I wanted to see how my mom would take it,” Patton offers, not so subtly searching the halls.

“Right. Suuuuuuure,” Remus giggled, “just remember that Virgie is mine,” he snaps playfully, “I don’t share and I certainly don’t do threesomes.” Remus winked, sending a shiver of disgust running down Patton’s spine. “Congrats, baby emo.”

“If you need to talk or something,” Virgil managed to offer before getting swept away by Remus.

Roman sighed, “Seriously, do you want to talk?”

“I’ll be fine, Ro. I’m still me. I just... I don’t know. It felt right this morning,” Patton offers as explanation.

“Well, you know where to find me. And if this is some ploy to get Janus to like you- it won’t work-” 

“I don’t care if he likes me,” Patton protests, “this isn’t about him.”

“It’s not?” Janus asked in a smooth voice, standing behind Patton as if he appeared there from thin air.

“Janus!” Patton whipped around, “how- when did you- um, hi.” he stammered.

Roman laughed and clapped Patton on the shoulder, “good luck, Romeo. See you at lunch.” He walked away still laughing as Patton blushed and tried to shake the teasing off.

Janus watched curiously. He certainly would never have predicted that Patton would show up in an all black pretend-emo costume. Amazing really how people could still surprise him. 

“I promise that Roman doesn’t know what he’s talking about-” Patton tried to recover his composure.

“He never does. Poor Remus got all the interesting and useful brains,” Janus sighed, examining his gloved hand nonchalantly. “Even if this were some ploy for my attention, I wouldn’t be interested just because you changed clothes and painted your nails.”

“That implies you would be interested in different circumstances,” Patton pointed out.

“Would I? I never said that. You understood my message, right?” Janus asked, changing topics quickly.

Patton nodded, “I- yes, I understood. You didn’t have to threaten me. Everyone thinks I broke my head and wouldn’t believe me saying either thing.” 

“Correct. No use spreading rumors,” Janus smirked.

“Janus?” 

“What?” 

“Do you think I’m a bad person?” Patton asked quietly.

Janus took a moment to think over the question, “Why are you asking me?”

“Because I think you’re probably the person I’ve hurt the most.”

Janus laughed, “Oh please. Like you could hurt me. Since when do you care about my opinions?”

“I don’t know- I’m really trying something new here, Janus.” Patton worried his lip between his teeth. 

“I see. I notice,” Janus nodded and turned to head towards class.

“Janus? Do I… seem like I have a crush on you?”

Janus stopped in his tracks, turning back slowly, “Do you have one?”

Patton shrugged his one good shoulder, “Roman says I must have one. I’m not sure. How do I figure it out?”

Janus studied the black clad teen he would have sworn had it out for him just two days ago. Who was he to answer this kind of question? And why wouldn’t he just ask Roman, the prince of failed relationships?

“I don’t know. Go on a date with me?” Janus was just as surprised at the words leaving his lips as Patton looked hearing them.

“Wait- really?”

“Yes. We can go out tonight. No need to make it formal. Just black, not black tie.” Janus nodded. It surprised him just how calm and collected he felt, proposing a romantic time together. 

Patton hummed, “um.. I assume Virgil… gave you my address,” he replied diplomatically, “would you be able to pick me up.”

“Yes. 9 o’clock?”

Patton nodded, “yeah, that works. I’ll see you then?”

Janus smiled just a bit mischievously, “yes, you will. Good luck in school today. Everyone is going to notice.”

“Notice what?” Patton asked.

“This.” Janus smirked and leaned forward, planting a lipstick stained kiss on Patton’s cheek, turning to leave just as the first bell rang out. 

Patton stood frozen like a deer, slowing reaching up to touch his cheek, “oh, shit-”

___ ___ ___

“Uh, Jannie?”

“Yes, Remus?”

“Where the fuck are we going?” Remus asked, hanging on the back of Janus’ seat.

Janus inhaled slowly, “We’re picking up my date for tonight.”

“Since when do you date?” Virgil asked, lounging in the back seat and scrolling on his phone.

“Since this morning,” Janus answered, “You two just made it look so fun I had to give it a try.”

“Ooooooooh,” Remus absolutely beamed, “so who’s the lucky virgin?”

“Come on, Re. Don’t assume,” Virgil chided, trying to pull his boyfriend back to the back seat. “Wait- I recognize this street-”

“Just shut up,” Janus growled, “You’re the ones who wanted me to date. He’s harmless and might even like me.”

“So you’re trying to go out with the guy who made our lives hell for over a year?” Virgil asked.

“I’m not being some sort of saint, I’m just curious about what Patton’s going through.”

“I’ll cancel the wedding bells,” Remus cackled as they pulled up to the door. The headlights swept over the porch, revealing Patton sitting outside in the dark. He popped up, rushing over to the passenger side of the car.

“Hey Janus- and… Virgil and Remus? What?” Patton squinted at the couple in the back seat, “is this.. A double date?”

“Somewhat. Get in,” Janus commanded, ignoring the snickering from the back seat. 

Patton climbed in and sat down, confused but not about to back out now. Not when Roman would roast him for failing to go on the first date he’s ever been asked out on. Janus pulled out of the driveway and continued on in relative quiet.

“So… where are we going?” Patton asked, a little too bright for his dark exterior. 

“You’ll see,” Janus replied cryptically.

Patton nodded and fell silent, watching the road slip by as they drove along.

“Woof. The chemistry is just bubbling,” Remus snarked after a few minutes of quiet, sitting back to cuddle into Virgil.

Virgil laughed softly, “give them time. I’m sure it’s just first date awkwardness.” He wrapped his arms around Remus and held him close.

Janus turned down a residential street and flicked off the headlights, “Well, Patton, since you’re exploring new countercultures, I figured it would be a good idea to bring you along to a protest.”

“A protest? At night?” Patton asked, fear glinting in his eyes, “what kind of protest?”

“One against ableism in the education system,” Virgil grinned, grabbing cartons of eggs from the floor of the back seat.

“Yeah! We’re gonna show that bitch what it feels like!” Remus crowed, opening the door before Janus could put the car in park and banging impatiently on the trunk. Virgil piled out as well as Janus parked and grabbed the latch to open the trunk for them. 

“This… is illegal, isn’t it?” Patton worried, glancing around the street to see if they had been spotted yet.

“Very.” Janus nodded, “but, lucky us that the Virus have the dirty work covered. We’re just lookouts tonight. Mrs. Hansen has been violating my disability accommodations. That makes my life harder when I end up missing the beginning of class because of the crowds in the hallway. So we’re making her morning a bit harder.”

“Oh.. that’s why you three were in the hallway during class time the other day?” Patton asked, voice softening at the realization.

“Yes. Sometimes we wait until after the bell anyway but she still shouldn’t be holding me back like that,” Janus explained.

“I’m sorry- I didn’t realize that,” Patton offered quietly, wincing as Remus started chucking raw eggs at the car in the driveway.

“Relax, Patton. They’re just letting off steam. I swear they would have burned the school down by now if I didn’t try to aim them at productive activities,” Janus chuckled, glancing down the road for any observers.

“Right. So… this is a date… why don’t you tell me about yourself?” Patton turned in his seat to face Janus. 

Janus slowly turned his head, “what do you want to know?”

“Um, I’m not sure. I’ve never done this before,” Patton laughed nervously, “maybe… when did you know that you’re gay?”

Janus snorted at that, “I still don’t know. You’re the first boy I’ve tried to date. You’d think hanging out around the twins would make that sort of question easy, right?”

“Right! Like, I’ve known Roman really well for years and he sure seems to know… some of what he wants. But I just don’t know how he understands what a crush is versus wanting to be friends.”

“Those two make it seem like you meet someone and suddenly they’re the only thought in your head ever,” Janus nodded to the couple who were busy laying out toilet paper strips in the shape of a penis on the hood of the car, “I’ve never understood it.” 

“Do you.. Feel that way about me?” Patton asks, “since you’re the one who asked me out.”

“Frankly, I find your change of aesthetic rather intriguing. And you seem willing to challenge some of your bullshit ideas right now, so why not?” Janus shrugs, “maybe I just want attention and don’t give a fuck about who you are. You can never know.”

Patton looked down towards his hands, folded neatly in his lap, “I think I’ve been jealous of you all.”

“How so? You seemed adamant about reporting us to the school like a narc for the past year,” Janus challenged.

“Because things like egging teacher’s houses and smoking in the hallways can cause problems for people! But, I do like how you all express yourselves.”

“Really?”

“Right. You just… get to be weird and stand out in classes. You get away with a disturbing amount of rule breaking. It seems really freeing,” Patton sighed softly, “Maybe I’m thinking about it wrong. I’ve just always felt terrified of disappointing people, and in just one day I’ve been able to disappoint almost everyone.”

“So, you’re just dressing emo to make people upset, not to express yourself?”

“I mean- maybe partially?” Patton shrugged, “I never knew you all were this criminal-”

“Patton-”

“And… I think it’s maybe hot that you all stand up for yourselves despite what people think of you?” Patton says shyly, more of a question than an opinion.

“I didn’t bring you along to impress you with like that-”

“No?”

“I thought giving Virgil and Remus a target would give us some time alone,” Janus explains.

“Time  alone to do what?” Panton leaned a bit closer.

“What we’re doing now, talking.”

“That’s all you wanted to do with me?” Patton asked, head tilted a bit.

“Did you want to kiss me?” 

“Patton-”

Patton leaned in even closer until the backdoor slammed open, sending him scrambling back to his seat, blushing bright red.

“Drive- Neighbor might be calling the cops.” Remus replied, out of breath.

Virgil nodded and Janus jumped into action to get away from the crime scene. 

“Looked like a productive date,” Remus teased as Janus slowed back down to avoid suspicion.

“Wow what a rush!” Patton exclaimed. 

“Adrenaline wasn’t the point,” Janus reminded him, “Are you two ready to head home?”

“Yeah, Remus’ please,” Virgil nods.

Remus spent the car ride back to his place giving the lookouts a play by play of the night, with Virgil interjecting with certain facts and figures.. Janus soon dropped the pair off and the silence settled between him and Patton. 

“I just… you guys get away with bad behavior all the time. I wish I could do that the same as you,” Patton spoke up eventually.

Janus sighed and pulled the car over again, this time near a park, “Do you even care about why we do that stupid shit?”

“Well, tonight was about getting back at Mrs. Hansen, right? For treating you badly,” Patton recalled.

“And skipping class is because it’s too overwhelming to sit still learning useless crap with a bunch of jerks who know nothing about what it’s like to try and navigate when your feet don’t just take you to where you need to go. They don’t care that it hurts to walk and it’s just safer to take my time with friends by my side to catch me.”

“I-”

“You just see me as some bad boy to upset people with. You don’t care how I feel about it, do you?” Janus challenged.

“That’s not true-” Patton tried to protest. 

“I’m not some average petty sinner to disappoint your family with at the holidays. I actually have feeling and wants and needs and I just- I-”

Patton reached over to take one of Janus’ hands, “It’s okay. I-I didn’t want to use you, Janus. Not in the long run. Sure, I wanted to experiment and see if Roman’s right about crushes, but I don’t want to trap you in a relationship you won’t enjoy. I don’t want to hurt you.”

Janus looked away, trying to pull his hand free.

“Just remember that you asked me out tonight. So, I thought that kisses were something you’re supposed to do on dates. Can we try again without interruptions this time? See if… well, if we’ll like that sort of thing?”

“Are you even listening to me?”

“Yes, yes I am. You are not a manic pixie dream boy or the dangerous rebel to scare my mom with. You’re Janus. And I don’t know you very well because I’ve never tried to get to know you. But we’re on a date. It’s past curfew. I think you at least deserve a chance at something properly romantic, since defacing property was just the distraction to keep Remus and Virgil busy. It’s too late to get food anywhere. So maybe we can try a kiss and start over again in the morning?”

Janus blinked, trying to process all of that at once. “Um… no.”

“No?” Patton sat back immediately, “did I do something wrong?”

“Not necessarily, I just… you asking makes it very clear to me that I don’t want to kiss you, Patton.” Janus tried to explain.

Patton nodded, “okay. I- actually, thank you? I- I was so scared…”

Janus chuckled softly, “I don’t think we’re crushing on each other. I’m not sure why not. But I’m glad you agree.” 

Patton nodded emphatically this time, “I very much don’t want to be the awkward one. I think… it would feel wrong or empty to try. And that’s not your fault-”

“I get it. I agree. We tried. Dating just… isn’t in our cards,” Janus laughed a bit more at that, “let me take you home?”

“Yes please. Maybe at school… we can just say hi?”

“That would be much more pleasant.”

Patton sighed softly and leaned back in the passenger seat, “I won’t tell about the eggs and toilet paper, by the way. Maybe I should ask Mrs. Hansen why she’s not letting you leave for class on time?”

Janus smiled, “That could be helpful. Maybe she just needs to see one of the responsible students concerned on our behalf.”

“Would have been a lot less illegal if you just asked me to do that in the first place,” Patton giggled, “It makes more sense than vandalism.”

“But throwing trash at her house is fun,” Janus grins, starting the car again.

“It may be fun. But there are much better outlets for the anger, I would think.” Patton grinned.

“Maybe you’ll be a good acquaintance after all,” Janus mused, pulling back out onto the road to take his definitely-not-a-date back home.

[takaraphoenix]

Pining Pluto & Proserpina

Tags: m/m, pining, fluff, hurt/comfort

Main Pairing: Hades/Persephone/Percy

@polympians-event Prompt: Roman.

@hadesxpercy-events Prompt: Pining Hades.

This story on FFNet | This story on AO3

Summary: Percy moved to New Rome for college. And regularly passing the temple of Pluto, he remembers how alienated he had felt when he'd first been here. Thankfully, not anymore. He has his friends, but he is also making new friends. Namely a very charming and gorgeous married couple he runs into at the dog park.

Pining Pluto & Proserpina

When Percy had been to Camp Jupiter for the very first time, it had made him feel alienated. Not just as an outsider coming in, not even because of his stolen memories, but to see Neptune – his father, and by association also himself – feared like that. It had even more impact on him when he regained his memories, because he remembered Lord Hades.

The god had left a lasting impression on him the first time he'd met him, looking truly godly and truly royal. But even beyond that, Hades was an outcast among the gods. And seeing that reflected in the way the Romans treated the god too.

Those were thoughts that crossed Percy's mind as he walked past the Temple of Pluto, marveling at its intimidating beauty. He'd been living in New Rome for a couple of days now, still getting settled in. He'd signed up for college, after finally graduating high school. Barking and pulling on the leash distracted him and redirected his attention away from the temple and to his dog.

"Okay, Molly, let's go and get you to the dog-park."

Mrs. O'Leary barked pleased at that, wagging her tail. One of the perks of living in New Rome was that Mrs. O'Leary finally got to stay fully with him. That also made living here less… lonely. Sure, his Roman friends were living here, but he was living alone right now. There's always been his mom, then Paul, now his new baby sister. He wasn't used to coming home to an empty apartment, nobody there to greet him, to share his meal with, to talk about his day.

Loud barking from Mrs. O'Leary was the only warning he got before he got fully dragged off by his hellhound. The downside of having a small-elephant-sized dog was that he was absolutely at his dog's whims. When Mrs. O'Leary finally stopped, Percy found himself fully flat on the ground.

"Oh, hello, gorgeous, you are so pretty."

A soft and beautiful voice. Percy blinked and looked up, finding a stunning woman petting Mrs. O'Leary. Her skin was light brown, her hair fell in long, dark curls, flowers braided into it, a grass-green dress hugging every curve of hers in a stunning manner. She turned toward him, curious.

"Oh, you are pretty too," she smiled at him and offered him a hand.

Clearing his throat in embarrassment, Percy accepted her hand and let her help him up. This woman had legs for days, proven by the way she was about two inches taller than him. Though at least one of those inches were her shoes. Blinking, he stared into her bright eyes, lost for words.

"Hello," she tilted her head intrigued. "I'm Pina Khthonios, daughter of Ceres. I'm new here."

Percy blinked. Name, he had a name, he knew he had a name, what was it? Her eyes were so warm, Percy felt like he was drowning in them, and her smile was so pretty. What was the question?

"Did you hit your head when you went down?" Pina frowned at him concerned. "Are you okay?"

"No," Percy shook his head. "I'm not not good at talking to pretty people."

His eyes widened and his cheeks flushed brightly, but at least it got him a bright laugh from Pina. "Why, thank you for the compliment. At least one of us is good at it though, otherwise this would not be much of a conversation. Now, your name, pretty boy?"

"Percy," Percy sputtered out, relieved. "My name is Percy Jackson."

Thank the gods, he remembered. Pina smiled at him amused, taking his hand to shake.

"Percy Jackson, I'll be sure to remember that name."

The blush returned, trice as strong. She smiled at him, looking pleased by the blush.

"And who is this gorgeous creature? I've never met anyone else who has a hell-hound."

"That's Mrs. O'Leary, she's the best girl," Percy grinned broadly.

For the first time, his eyes landed on what had brought them here to begin with. Why Mrs. O'Leary had run off. Because… there were three hell-hounds here. Leashed. And Pina was holding the leashes. Percy raised his eyebrows in surprise. The three puppies turned to stare at him and the next moment, he was buried under a heap of gigantic dogs.

"No! Boys! Down!" Pina sounded slightly panicked. "Don't trample the pretty boy!"

Percy just laughed and did his best to pat as many dogs as he could reach. "I'm okay, I'm great, these are great. Who are good boys? Who are very good boys? Well, who are they?"

He craned his neck to look at Pina from between furry paws, making Pina laugh. "This is Cerball, this one's Berach and the one licking your cheek is Osheen."

The dogs eased off enough for Percy to get up, again. He smiled at Pina. A beautiful woman who loved dogs and was very charming. This seemed like a great start to his time here. Part of what he had promised himself was to move on. His teen romance with Annabeth hadn't survived Tartarus, unsurprisingly so – when one used their powers to protect their partner and said partner looked back in fear, that was… hard to move on from. Annabeth had come out of Tartarus frightened by Percy, and Percy was done making himself small for others. He'd needed time, after, and then he decided to move here, while Annabeth had moved to Boston to be closer to her family, to attend mortal college, get a great degree in architecture. It was time to move on. And it was hard to not see this literal 101 Dalmatians meet-cute as a sign.

"I'm sure I'll be seeing you around here a lot, then? With three dogs?"

"Absolutely," Pina laughed. "They need a lot of exercise. It's nice to see another hell-hound around, we should make play-dates for our dogs so they can really roam free."

Oh, this was going better than expected. Percy beamed at her as he agreed.

/break\

Over the following couple of weeks, Percy got settled in. Starting college and adjusting to how different it was from high school, getting used to living on his own, reconnecting more with his Roman friends – living on different ends of the US, on top of their own lives, made that harder. It was good to be able to just drop by at Hazel and Frank's and hang out with them, or go and bother Reyna at work until she started bribing him out of her office with doughnuts.

And then there was Pina. Every two or three days, the two of them would meet up at the dog park, so their puppies could play. In that time, he also got to know her better. Estranged from her father, because she never got along with her stepmother, though she had some half-siblings she was close to. She loved flowers and nature, which figured for a child of Ceres – Roman's Demeter. They often ended up wandering to the flowering fields, the rose garden in the park. It was amazing to see her interact with flowers, making them bloom and grow and twist.

He finally felt like the time was right to actually ask her out – knowing her well enough to know he had a huge crush on her and wanted to spend even more time with her. Which was, of course, when something had to get in the way. Namely, her husband.

"Darling, so this is that little friend of yours you have been telling me about? Good to meet you, Percy Jackson. I'm Theon. My wife speaks highly of you."

Percy stared, and blinked. Today was the day he had wanted to ask Pina out – and how had it not come up yet that she had a husband? Or that her husband was a whole snack? Though the latter should not be a surprise. After all, Pina was breathtaking, so why shouldn't she get a man as good looking as her? Tall, lithe, with olive-skin and black curls, wearing the most well-tailored suit Percy had ever seen. And the suit looked expensive too.

"Is he okay?" Theon turned toward his wife with a frown. "He's not… said anything yet."

"Oh, that's normal," Pina laughed and waved a dismissive hand. "He's not good at talking to pretty people, according to himself. Give his brain a moment to catch up."

Percy blushed furiously at that, even though he knew she was right. "Hi, I'm Percy. Pina… never… mentioned having a husband, so I was a little… surprised."

He forced a smile, even as he shook Theon's hand. There was a sheepish look on Pina's face, at least. So she was aware that she had kind of forgotten to mention something there.

"Well, we will get to know each other better now," Theon smiled charmingly at him.

Percy tilted his head. "How come I haven't met you so far, then?"

"Work," Theon explained. "I am… a busy man. But I'm glad my wife has found someone to be good company while I was away."

There was something so charming about the man, yet also intimidating in a way. Authoritative, strong, with an overwhelming aura. Percy could picture very vividly how this man would be patting his head in praise and tell him he was doing good. Percy shook his head wide-eyed.

/break\

Pluto heaved a sigh as he let himself fall onto his favorite armchair in the apartment in New Rome. An apartment. Who would have thought the king of the underworld would be living in an apartment in the mortal world like that. Alas, he had been drawn to New Rome by Percy Jackson.

The Greek hero had intrigued Pluto during the Titan War already. He had been impressive and Pluto liked a strong-willed someone who knew to stand up to him. That spitfire energy was why he had fallen in love with his beautiful wife, after all. But it was only when Percy had moved to New Rome that Pluto felt drawn out. Every time Percy walked past his temple and thought of Pluto, thought of the parallel in how Neptune and Pluto were treated by the Romans. He could feel the growing respect and also the self-reflection Percy was feeling. Pluto could hear them like prayers.

So he had asked his beloved wife, to give it a chance. He'd never been one to cheat, he wasn't like his brothers. When he took a mortal lover, it was never just him. They always shared. They picked their mortal together and only engaged in anything once they agreed.

Proserpina had been doubtful at first, though she had agreed. After all, she had interacted with the hero before too and had found him interesting. She'd wanted to see what kind of young man he'd grown into since then, how the two wars had formed him.

And then Proserpina went to the dog park with Zerberus. Proserpina seemed quickly charmed by Percy, but Pluto bid his time, waiting until she was smitten. Until she was the one to ask him to come along to the dog park. He tried not to be smug about it.

The thing about Percy Jackson was that he was very charming. So snarky and funny and cute. A real spitfire, the way he liked them. And seeing his wife with Percy, the easy friendship between them, joking and laughing and generally looking absolutely beautiful together. Intrigue quickly turned into something more, the more actual time they both were spending with Percy.

"I think," Proserpina whispered into his ear, as she sat down on his lap, her hands on his chest. "I think it's time for us to make a move. You know a pretty boy like him, a great and celebrated hero like him, he has people making heart-eyes at him from all sides."

Grunting, Pluto wrapped his arms around his wife's waist, pulling her closer. He was very well aware of that. Beyond his good looks and heroic background, Percy was currently studying to become a teacher. Who didn't like a cute guy who was good with kids? And the passion he had for it, when he would talk about what great influences Chiron posing as Mr. Brunner and his now stepfather Paul Blofis had been, how he had always struggled in school, but the right teachers, knowing how to help him, had made his life so much easier and that he wanted to be that kind of presence for future generations. It was captivating, how passionate he was.

/break\

It only came to Percy when he had told his mom about them, about a month after meeting 'Theon'. When he first said their names together, because Pina had introduced herself as Pina Khthonios. That alone hadn't really raised any suspicion, neither had her husband's name on his own. But when he put that together. Theon Khthonios. God of the Underworld, in Greek. An epithet of Hades. Or Pluto, in this case – because he would have recognized Hades, he'd met Hades before, but the Roman aspects of the gods tended to look different than their Greek counterparts. And Pina. Short for Proserpina, he'd guess. Pluto's wife. Persephone's Roman aspect.

That realization had come to him at his mom's kitchen table, when he told her about his new friends. The friends he had crushes on. The friends who were married and whom Percy had thought were like a decade and a half older than him but actually seemed to be more like a few millennia older than him. The friends who were actual gods, a king and a queen at that.

And the friends who still hadn't told him the truth, even as he kept waiting. He'd thought about confronting them – once he stopped freaking out about his realization – but then he decided against it. Because he wanted to know if they would tell him the truth on their own. He also wanted to know why exactly they were even hanging out with him to begin with.

What was their goal here? Was he some kind of entertainment for two bored gods? Had they… really become friends, was that genuine? And what was he supposed to make of the flirting? Which had only been increasing, but Percy was absolutely playing dumb until they told him the truth. Both, about having figured out the truth, as well as noticing their flirting.

"I brought you a snack," Percy grinned as he produced three big dog treats. "Who's three good boys? Or… one big good boy, mh, Zerberus?"

After having figured out Pluto and Proserpina, it didn't take a genius to realize the three hell-hounds who always stuck very closely together and were named Cerball, Berach and Osheen were a heavily misted Zerberus. The puppies looked up at him with adoring, big eyes before being handed the treats. Now he wondered if the two gods had deliberately 101 Dalmatian trapped him.

"You spoil them," Pluto heaved a sigh, looking at him.

All Percy offered in return was a huge, cheeky grin. He'd been invited over for dinner today. To celebrate the end of Percy's first semester, and that he had survived his exams. The apartment was huge, furniture all fancy designer stuff in black, but it didn't feel gloomy because there were so many plants everywhere, absolutely thriving. Pluto was cooking for them. The king of the underworld was cooking for Percy. That was absolutely wild to him. And charming.

"So, now that your first semester is officially over, how do you like college?"

Proserpina sat down next to Percy, resting her chin on her palm as she regarded him. She was so beautiful, sometimes it still took his breath away to look at her even though they'd been friends for months now. It was funny to him, looking back, how she had never actually lied to him. She never claimed to be a demigod, she only introduced herself as a daughter of Ceres, which was the truth. She'd told him about her estranged dad, the stepmother she didn't get along with – Jupiter and Juno – and that she had a lot of half-siblings on her father's side, which, was also true. Clever.

"I like it," Percy shrugged with a thoughtful look. "I mean, still not really a fan of academic learning myself, it's… a struggle, but I know I need to get through it to get to where I want to be."

"And how is… everyone treating you?" Pluto spoke in a strangely careful manner. "We know you're popular and made a lot of new friends, but did you… met someone… interesting?"

Oh. Oh, that was cute. The big bad king of the underworld was trying to subtly figure out if Percy was seeing anyone. Percy bit his lip to keep from grinning outright. He distracted himself by petting the puppies instead. Interesting turn of the evening, he wondered where this was going.

"I did make a lot of new friends, sure," Percy tilted his head. "But I was rather busy with school and work and didn't exactly concentrate on trying to find dates. A new relationship would need attention and care, and with everything else going on in my life at the time, that didn't… seem like a good idea. I was adjusting to the new city, to college, had to focus on my studies."

"At the time, you say?" Proserpina perked up, looking at him like a hawk at its prey.

Huh. That should not be as hot as it was. Percy blinked repeatedly at her.

"Yeah," Percy grinned at them both, an edge of teasing – baiting them. "I mean, it's semester break now. And sure, I'll be working extra shifts, but I've had the job all semester. It's nothing new. There won't be classes to focus on. And the break is three months, so that would give me plenty of time to… actually focus on building a relationship, before the semester starts."

"Ah," Pluto looked displeased. "And… do you have anyone in mind?"

"I me—ean," Percy leaned back, regarding the two of them. "Maybe. But you know, what's really important to me, in a relationship, is honesty. That's just, that's the key to a good, functioning relationship, wouldn't you agree? Honesty and trust. So I'm just, looking for someone like that."

There was a moment of processing on both their parts. Okay, so maybe he was growing a little tired of waiting. Maybe these gods needed a bit of a push. And Percy was very good at pushing gods.

"Oh, you little tease, you know," Proserpina blinked at him before she started laughing, leaning against her husband for support. "When did you figure it out?"

"Oh, I'm the tease?" Percy raised one eyebrow. "You spent a month flirting with me and making me want to ask you out, just for you to only then introduce your husband to me, mh?"

The laughter died down and Proserpina smiled at him near sheepishly. "In all fairness, I didn't mean to make you want to ask me out, when I first approached you. I simply wanted to… get to know you, to see who you are, beyond the great savior of Olympus."

Raising one eyebrow, Percy crossed his arms over his chest. "Sure. Why?"

A grin spread over Proserpina's lips as she wrapped her arms around her husband's neck. "Because my beloved here has been pining, and he wanted me to see if that is… an idea to be pursued."

"And what is that?" Percy also raised his other eyebrow, now looking at Pluto. "Well?"

"You are a nineteen year old demigod, why am I feeling chided by you?" Pluto huffed and crossed his own arms. "This is ridiculous."

"Oh, is the great and powerful lord of the underworld being pouty now, mh?"

Percy gave him an unimpressed look, before he reached out for the food. No need to let good Italian dinner go to waste. He grinned a little when an embarrassed blush colored Pluto's cheeks.

"You seem to forget that I am the powerful lord of the underworld. You are being cheeky."

"And I don't see you smiting me about it," Percy shrugged and stuffed his face with chicken. "Besides, I am not the one who lied for months here. So get off your high horse."

"I should not find your defiance charming," Pluto muttered beneath his breath. "In my, our, defense, we lied to you to get the chance to get to know you. Would you have been as open with us if you had known who we are from the get-go?"

Heaving a sigh, Percy reached out to get more pasta. "Fine, I'll give you that. But it's been months now. We have been… friends for months now. You should have told me for a while."

"You're right," Proserpina nodded and reached out to take his hand. "But that's easier said than done, sweetie. When is that right time? It's not like there was a specific point where things shifted. Everything grew… more naturally. Us, becoming friends, me… seeing the appeal in you, and ultimately… seeing so much more than just the pretty boy."

"At what point do you come clean, and how," Pluto heaved a sigh. "We have been talking about it, for a while, but we just… I wasn't sure what your reaction to that would be. We don't have the best track-record with each other, do we?"

"You did throw me into your dungeons once and that wasn't much appreciated," Percy tilted his head amused. "But… years ago, you did save my mother's life and that is… more than most gods have done for me. I'm not stupid, I mean I was an angry kid back then who just saw that his mom had been taken, but I know enough about this world now to know that she would have died at the minotaur's hands, if you hadn't taken her in the last second. And in my track-record of gods asking for my help, saving my mom's life was honestly the best one. Definitely beat Hera's 'I'll abduct you and erase your memories for a couple months' spiel."

Pluto winced at that, while Proserpina huffed with a glare. "Yes, my stepmother is… charming."

One of Pluto's eyebrows wandered up. "So, what I'm hearing here is that my chances aren't zero."

Percy's eyes landed on Proserpina's hand, still covering his. With a small smile did he reach his free hand out for Pluto. The god looked surprised when Percy linked their fingers and somehow, that expression really pleased Percy. He was capable of flustering and surprising a god.

"I mean, I have been flirting with you guys for months, if you haven't noticed," Percy gave them both a pointed look. "I have been flirting with you after I noticed and put one and one together."

Proserpina's eyes were sparkling brightly as she leaned in. "So you are interested in us then, the real us, knowing who we are?"

That gave Percy a little pause. "I mean, I would have to get to know the real you. Sure, I noticed you told me very clever half-truths, but… the two of you living in New Rome like demigods isn't your truth, you guys are a king and a queen, two gods. That being said, I… am… interested in you, yes. I never really pictured myself dating gods, even just one, much less two, but… I love spending time with you guys. You've been… kind, sweet, charming, I… would like to see where it goes…"

Slowly, he leaned over the table, closer to the goddess in front of him. Heh. Literal and figurative. Tilting his head, he waited. Waited for her to move closer too. With a smile on her lips did she oblige, until they met in a soft and gentle kiss. She tasted like honey, which was a bit surprising but then she was the goddess of spring, wasn't she? They kissed, until Pluto cleared his throat.

"I was the one who proposed this, how come that she is getting the first kiss?"

"Look at him, pouting again," Proserpina whispered against Percy's lips. "He has been pining for you so badly, you should have heard him whine about how cute you are and-"

"Please stop undermining me, wife!" Pluto groaned in frustration. "I have a reputation to maintain and you make me look like some… some big softy."

"It's cute that he thinks I don't know this already," Percy whispered right back to Proserpina. "I have seen him be a dog-dad for months now, he totally spoils them too. Because he is a softy."

Laughing softly, Percy turned toward Pluto and kissed him to appease the now legitimately pouting god. Pluto's face softened as he pulled Percy closer, making Percy smile. Not the outcome he had expected from moving to New Rome, but he was definitely not complaining.

~*~ The End ~*~