#Ricky doesn’t get to just run off after everything he did. I want his ass haunted. I want his ass hunted. I want him to be afraid.

[deskgirl]

I want season 3 of Our Flag Means Death to happen and I want it for one very simple reason:

Revenge.

[sitkowski]

hum static (twist it, grasp it) ( ryan sitkowski/justin morrow/ricky olson )

pairing: ryan sitkowski/justin morrow/ricky olson cw: 18+ MDNI ⚠️ friends with benefits, anal fingering, double anal penetration, rough sex, finger sucking, face slapping, biting, choking, justin is the meat in this sandwich and he left his last two brain cells in that bathroom in paris. word count: 3.1k author's note: my first fic for friends in sin miw kinktober is done. this one is for the prompt of 'multiple penetration'. shout out to @ao3userfeistycadavers for running this bad boy. hopefully i actually manage to get my other fics up during the month. please enjoy this! title comes from "static hum" by chelsea wolfe. divider by @saradika-graphics ✨

⇉ masterpost || taglist signups || read on ao3

Justin’s currently trapped in a real life episode of Family Feud. There’s one question on the board: name something your bandmate would ask you out of the blue. And of all the guesses Justin would make, being invited to a threesome was not one of them at all, not even a top five answer. He can literally hear the buzzer sound in his head as he stares at Ricky too long before answering his question. Both Steve Harvey and Ricky are waiting very patiently, the crowd is whispering. Justin is probably losing his mind.

“Repeat that, like I’m five.”

Ricky narrows his eyes at him. “You heard me.”

“Yeah no I did absolutely hear you. I could have sworn you asked me if I wanted to fuck around with you and Ryan. Since when do you and Ryan fuck around?”

Justin’s pretty sure his voice just reached a pitch it hasn’t since he was a teenager. Thankfully no one is around to hear him. Everyone else is dealing with the post show breakdown, and it’s just Ricky and Justin in this hallway, where Ricky dragged him to ask him this very important question.

“Oh no, I broke you.” Ricky reaches up to pat the top of Justin’s head sympathetically. He’s got to stand on his tiptoes to do it. “To answer your question, like six years now? On and off. You gonna answer my question, or are we pretending this never happened?”

The thing is Justin knows he’s in a band of objectively hot dudes. And while the revelation that Ryan and Ricky occasionally sleep together is blowing his mind almost as much as the original question Ricky asked, he’s pretty sure he’d be stupid to say no. He nods, because apparently his ability to speak has vanished as he’s now picturing whatever Ricky and Ryan have been getting up to for the past six years.

Fingers snap in front of his face, and he automatically reaches up to wipe at his mouth in case he’s doing something embarrassing like drooling.

“Uh yeah, no, I’m very much in. When?”

He starts wracking his brain for the next hotel night, and realizes that is where they’re headed after they’re done here. It also occurs to him that he and Ricky are rooming together like they always do these days.

“So I should tell Ryan you’re in for tonight? I need you to be absolutely sure, because the last thing I need is Chris butchering my ass and leaving my body parts along the highway because I fucked everything up.”

He doesn’t have the heart to tell him that Ricky could literally murder Justin and Chris would still love him. “Yeah. Tonight is good.”

Ricky just nods and wanders off to find Ryan, like he asked Justin if they were going to watch a movie when they got to the hotel or something. Justin’s still trying to process it all throughout the rest of the time at the venue. It’s not lost on him that Ryan and Ricky have planned this out, talked about him. He wishes he could have left ahead of everyone else to mentally prepare. Apparently, Ricky’s some sort of mind reader as well as a little sexual terrorist, because he pulls Ryan into the bar instead of towards the elevator when they reach the hotel.

Even though he showered at the venue, Justin showers again since things are going to be happening. It’s a miracle that he doesn’t jerk off before they get there, because he figures it’s pointless if there’s going to be someone else to touch his dick soon. By the time he emerges from the bathroom, both Ryan and Ricky are sitting at the table in the corner.

He feels caught. It’s not an entirely unpleasant feeling.

“Why does this look more like an intervention and less like a threesome?”

Ryan snorts and takes a pull from his vape, and Ricky kicks out the third chair. “Sit for a sec.”

It’s not a suggestion and Justin only hesitates for a minute before sitting down. They’re both looking at him now and he realizes that there’s about to be some sort of talk or feelings or whatever, before anything else happens.

“Is this the part where you two tell me you’re into some very freaky shit—”

“You’re into some very freaky shit. I mean, not on Rick’s level but you’ve got a big mouth. We all know it.”

“Relax,” Ricky says. “You act like I’m gonna chain you up or something.”

“Not the first time at least,” Ryan mutters, and Justin sees him jolt a little when Ricky kicks him under the table. “Have you even done anything like this before?”

Justin raises his eyebrows. “This isn’t my first threesome. Not my first time with a guy either. Two though...”

He trails off because he doesn’t need to elaborate on that. And honestly if he was going to trust anyone like this, of course it would be these two. They’re both staring at him like they’re going to eat him alive and maybe it takes him more than a minute to realize they’ve been looking at him like this for days.

“Is it your first time being fucked by two guys at once?”

“You mean like—”

Ryan makes an obscene gesture that is meant to mimic two cocks and one hole. Justin looks back and forth between the two of them. It’s not that he doesn’t think they’re serious, it’s that he thinks they’re insane. Apparently, some kind of panic shows on his face, and the two of them start having a private conversation with their eyes that makes him want to hide out on the balcony and smoke.

“Fuck, you’ve never bottomed before, have you?” Ricky asks the most obvious question. “You’re a—”

He’s never been ashamed of that, and he isn’t going to start now. “If you say it, I’m going to punch you in the dick and then only one of you will be able to fuck me instead of both.”

Ryan gives Ricky a smug look, and Justin pushes away from the table, making his way towards the bed. They’re both still sitting there, having that same conversation still, so he rolls his eyes and throws himself down on the mattress. Kicking off his shorts, he props himself up on his elbows, waiting to see which one of them is going to move first. While he waits he reaches down to wrap his fingers around the base of his cock, and they watch him before looking at each other and finally moving.

His dick jerks in his hand as they approach the bed, one on either side. Ricky reaches for him first, hand clamping down on his throat to push his head back into the pillows as his mouth comes down over Justin’s. He barely gets a chance to get too into it before Ryan wraps his hand around the edge of his jaw and turns his head so that he can kiss Justin next. Maybe he should be a little concerned with how easy it is to just kiss them both, let them pass his mouth back and forth like a blunt until his lips are swollen and he’s practically squirming into the sheets. But he’s more concerned with the fact they both still have their clothes on.

Finally they let him breathe, if only long enough for Ryan to use that hold on his jaw to make Justin look at Ricky. He absolutely does not analyze what it means that the two of them are smaller than him in some ways and he’s just letting them do whatever they want.

“You with us?” Ricky asks, and Ryan nods Justin’s head for him. “We’re gonna get you ready for us—”

“I, uh,” he knows that saying if you can’t say it, you shouldn’t be doing it is stupid, given the current situation, but he still finds himself stalling on the words in their presence. “Got ready in the shower, I’m good to go.”

Ryan laughs, a little meanly. “That’s cute. He thinks he’s ready.”

Justin absolutely does not whine at that. Except he doesn’t have any control of his mouth at this point, or his hands, which start pulling impatiently at both of them. He needs them to get with the program and get naked already. He tries to tell them that, but his words get cut off by Ricky pressing fingers into his mouth, dragging them over his tongue, pushing them back further. Justin gags, just a little, before he sinks his teeth into those fingers. He wraps his tongue around them, gets them as wet as he can. When Ricky pulls them out, he gives him a quick sharp slap to his cheek. It’s enough to pull a started moan from Justin’s throat.

“No biting,” Ricky says and then he drags his wet fingers down Justin’s chest. “You wanna turn over or you wanna stay like this?”

“You gonna take off your clothes at any point?”

Ryan’s hand comes down on his hip in a stinging slap, and Justin yelps, trying to squirm away from him. It only pushes him further into Ricky.

“Justin, hey look at me,” Ricky’s voice is suddenly deceptively soft, and he turns his head to look at him like he’s told. “You got a safeword?”

If they’re about to play good cock bad cock, Justin cannot tell which is which. They’re fucking with his head and they know it.

“Buffalo.”

It’s the first word that comes to his mind, and something he wouldn’t blurt out during sex. In normal circumstances, anyway. Ryan gets off the bed, moving around to where Ricky’s bags are piled. Ricky gives Justin’s thigh a tap and he just rolls over onto his stomach, shuffling up onto his knees. He hears the sound of shuffling fabric behind him, hears the murmur of voices as they talk behind him. He’s two seconds away from throwing himself onto his back again so he can watch when he feels Ricky’s spit slicked fingers slide into him.

As far as it goes, it doesn’t feel like much more than when he fingered himself in the shower earlier. Justin hitches out a breath and sinks further into the mattress. He feels the sharpness of teeth in his shoulder and the scrape of blunt nails down his back. Ricky’s fingers twist and spread and then there’s more. Because Ryan is edging his fingers in right alongside them. For a hot second, he tries to get away from what is essentially an entire hand in his ass, but then he moans and rocks back into it.

“You think this is enough?” Ryan asks, and Justin realizes that he’s not talking to him, he’s talking to Ricky. “I don’t think we can get any more in.”

Justin couldn’t agree more, all he can think about is how full he feels and how different it will be when they’re both fucking him. He starts to reach for his cock again, but Ryan wraps his free hand around his wrist, pinning it to the bed.

“You and I both know the second you get your hand on your dick, you’re gonna come. Be fucking patient.”

“You still good up there, big guy?” Ricky asks, and he twists his fingers just right.

Justin appreciates the check in but the fact that he’s still expected to form full sentences while they’re stretching him open is some sort of torture. He couldn’t even guess who keeps dragging their fingertips over his prostate, or what else they might be doing behind him.

“I’m gonna kill the both of you, the second we’re done here,” he moans into the sheets. Ryan laughs, and they both pull their fingers out. “Oh thank fucking god.”

His relief is short-lived, as Ryan moves up the bed and fits himself between Justin and the mattress. Justin immediately hauls him into a biting kiss, digging his fingers into his sides, trying to get some kind of control over the situation. But just because he’s under him doesn’t mean he’s got a leg to stand on. Not when he feels Ricky guiding Ryan’s cock into him. Ryan brings his hand up to Justin’s throat, pulling back to look him in the eyes.

“Well, you got one in. Good for you.”

Justin barks out a laugh, “Fuck you.”

The hand on his throat tightens, just a little. Just enough for him to feel it. Ryan gives him that mean smile again. “Yeah. You’re gonna eat those words, Morrow.”

Apparently that’s all the adjustment time he’s getting, and Ryan snaps his hips up. Justin jolts forward, catching himself with his hands on Ryan’s chest and he sucks in a shuddering breath. He lets him set the pace, and knows it’s probably easier that way. When he looks over his shoulder, he sees Ricky’s there, waiting.

“Come on,” Ryan says almost impatiently. The whole talking around Justin thing shouldn’t be doing it for him, yet it is. When Ricky crowds up behind him, fingers absently teasing over his rim where it’s stretched around Ryan’s cock, Justin doesn't think he’s going to survive this at all. Ryan stops moving. “Hold still. Trust me.”

“I do,” Justin blurts out. “I trust you both.”

Ricky braces a hand in between Justin’s shoulder blades, and Justin’s mouth falls open as he feels him sliding in alongside Ryan. It’s more than a stretch, and it’s both uncomfortable and everything he wants. Ryan keeps his hold on Justin’s throat, keeping his eyes on him, obviously checking for any signs that Justin would want to stop. But he couldn't imagine it. He’s suddenly so full that all he can do is breathe in through his nose and try not to claw his way through Ryan’s chest. It doesn’t register to him right away that one of them is talking to him, not until Ricky threads his fingers through Justin’s hair and pulls his head back.

“How does that feel?”

“It’s alotta dick.” Justin’s voice comes out high because of the angle Ricky’s holding him at. “It’s good. Great even. It would be better if you’d move.”

Ricky gives his hair another tug and Justin gasps and writhes up to try and lessen the tension, but it’s no use. Ryan’s no help either, because he wraps his hand around Justin’s cock and starts moving it slowly while both he and Ricky are just inside him, not doing anything.

“Fuck, please, okay I will beg if I have to,” Justin tries to move himself and finds that he can’t, not unless he were to really push for it, but he doesn’t have the brain capacity for it right now. “There is no way you assholes haven’t done this to someone else, fuck.”

“I don’t know about you Rick, but I think he’s ready.”

“Fuck you,” Justin says again, more breathless than the last time.

Ricky lets go of his hair, and pushes him forward, just a little bit more. Ryan’s hand that isn’t on his cock wraps around his jaw, and he feels the bite of his rings as he holds onto his face while Ricky pulls out slowly and shoves back in less slowly, and then Ryan rocks his hips up. All Justin can do is take it, his body pinned between them as they set a pace that makes his brain melt out of his ears. He’s as pliant as he can be, moving with each hard thrust in and slow drag out. Ryan’s let go of Justin’s cock only for him to be able to rub off against Ryan’s stomach while he presses those fingers into his mouth against Justin’s tongue.

“Is it too much?” Ricky asks as he mouths along Justin’s spine.

He can’t speak around Ryan’s fingers, so he just nods his head, pushes back into them as much as he can. It is too much, but it’s exactly what he wants. Ricky grabs onto Justin’s hips harder, yanking him into each thrust while Ryan holds him still. He keeps him grounded. Justin feels like he’s going to melt right off of this bed, off of the fucking planet. Ryan’s wet fingers drag down his face and Justin ducks down to kiss him. Sweat drips down onto Ryan’s chest, stings the little scratches that Ricky’s leaving on his hips and back. 

“You gonna come?” Ryan nips at Justin’s mouth, grins when he nods rapidly. “What about you, Rick?”

“Justin, you gotta tell us if we can come inside—”

“Way to ask now,” Justin mutters, looking over his shoulder. “It’s fine I know you’re both clean.”

Ricky groans and laughs, pressing his forehead against Justin’s back as his thrusts grow shallow and stuttered. He can’t actually feel it when Ricky comes, but he definitely feels it when he pulls out, slumping into Justin as Ryan uses the opportunity to fuck up into him roughly. It gives Justin room to be able to move now and he braces his hands on Ryan’s chest, grinding down on him with every thrust upward. Ricky’s at his side now, plastered against him and reaching between them to get his hand on Justin’s dick. His chin digs into Justin’s shoulder, and he feels his eyes burning into the side of his face.

“Hey Justin,” he says, voice casual as ever as he strokes his cock. “You’ve been so good for us.”

“The best,” Ryan groans out in agreement. He grabs onto Justin’s hips hard and holds him down on his cock, and comes inside of him. “Now you.”

It only takes a few more twists of Ricky’s hand for Justin to come all over his fist and Ryan’s stomach. He slumps forward a little, trying to catch his breath. Ricky pets his hand through his hair, and Ryan pulls him down for a slow kiss. When he turns his head, Ricky is there for kisses of his own. Finally, he’s able to lift himself up off of Ryan and fall onto the bed between the two of them.

“Now how do you feel?” Ricky asks. It’s impossible to miss the snark in his voice, and Justin tries to slap at him but it requires too much effort.

Ryan gives him another hard slap to his hip before he pushes himself out of the bed. “That wasn’t a rhetorical question.”

“I don’t have the spoons to answer your questions right now. Ask me again in an hour,” Justin somehow manages to twist himself over onto his back. He grimaces as he can feel the come dripping out of him as he moves. “Oh, I feel that.”

Ricky snorts, propping his chin up on Justin’s chest while Ryan disappears into the bathroom. “How against pictures are—”

“If you take out your camera and try to ask me for an update, you’ll never be allowed near my ass again.”

Ricky starts to say something, but Ryan tosses him a damp cloth that hits him directly in the face.

⇉ taglist @deathblacksmoke @ladyveronikawrites @circle-with-me @ao3userfeistycadavers

@rumoured-whispers @dominuslunae @cookiesupplier

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[sisterspooky1013]

Damsels, Chapter Thirteen: You Changed My Life

By SisterSpooky1013 / Rated E

Read previous chapters here / Tagging @today-in-fic

Adult content immediately after the jump.

The trill of a cell phone pulls her from her dreamless slumber, and Mulder rolls out of bed with a hmph to retrieve it from the kitchen counter. Feigning sleep, she watches him as he traverses the room naked. The soft curve of his ass and then the rigid mast of his morning erection flood her with memories of what it had felt like when buried inside her, and she bites back a smile

“Mulder,” he says sleepily, searching for his underwear. “Good morning, Agent Wiley,” he continues as he slips on his shorts and then sits on the edge of the bed, leaning over to place a quiet kiss on her temple.

She opens her eyes, as though for the first time.

“Yes, she’s here, one second.”

He sets the phone on the bedside table and turns to kiss her again, on the mouth this time. Mulder kissing her awake is something she could definitely get used to. He stands and goes into the bathroom while she takes the call.

“Good morning, Agent Wiley,” she greets, not even caring if the other agent had heard them kissing.

“Morning, Agent Scully. Sorry to track you down on your partner’s phone, the one we assigned you was still off.”

“Sorry about that, it didn’t even cross my mind to turn it on last night.”

Mulder pops his head out of the bathroom with her toothbrush in his mouth and wags his eyebrows suggestively. She shoots him a look, but it’s discredited by the smile on her lips.

“Not a problem. I just wanted to share some updates with you. We spent quite a bit of time questioning Ricky Dean last night and while we still have some loose ends to tie up, it’s looking like we’ll be able to close this case pretty quickly.”

“Really?” she asks with surprise. She had figured the search for Mila would continue, and that Ricky might even be arrested. She’s relieved to hear that’s not the case.

“Mr. Dean had some additional documentation indicating that Mila was there of her own free will,” continues agent Wiley, “and it’s pretty compelling stuff. He also said that she left about a month before you got there, but he hadn’t yet updated the file. That, in conjunction with the documents you found, make us confident that things are as they seem, which is that Mila chose to cut ties with her parents. You were right, by the way, about Mr. Dean running a kind of witness protection program. The gentleman you had mentioned, Roger Keane, was acting as a benefactor of sorts, funding the women’s expenses until they had a steady income from the club.”

She’s quiet for a beat while this information sinks in. “What about Lexie, and her husband?”

“Mr. Hall is in custody and will likely be charged with attempted murder, on top of assaulting a federal officer. Jennifer is doing well. She’s awake, doped to the gills on painkillers, but expected to fully recover. She was able to get back in contact with her mother, who is caring for little Aubrey.”

“That’s a relief,” Scully says with a sigh. “Do you need me to come down to the station?”

“No rush, you can stop by this afternoon. I’ll be here.”

“Thank you, I’ll see you later,” she replies, ending the call as Mulder returns from the bathroom.

“What’s the latest?” He asks, slipping back beneath the sheets and pulling her into his arms. She hides her morning breath against his neck.

“They’re closing the case,” she says plainly.

“Must be pretty frustrating, knowing she was gone before you even got there,” he says, brushing his fingers over the small of her back.

“She was there, Mulder,” she lifts her head to look at him. “I lied.”

He gives her an incredulous expression and she rolls out of bed and steps into the bathroom. Switching the shower on, she brushes her own teeth with an already-wet toothbrush.

“I’m going to take a shower, I’ll tell you about it over breakfast,” she says before closing the door.

Twenty minutes later she has washed away the evidence of their activities the night before and they sit at her small dining room table, drinking coffee and eating the scrambled eggs and toast Mulder prepared as she tells him about Mila. She decides to leave out the part about their conversation on the couch; that’s something she will keep just for herself.

“I can see why you did what you did, Scully. It was a tough position to be in,” he says as he touches her arm reassuringly.

“I know it was the right thing to do, but it still feels bizarre to lie on an official case report,” she replies. “I hope she’s okay, wherever she is. She was a good friend to me when I really needed one.”

Three soft raps on the door interrupt them, and they look at each other in confusion.

“Are you expecting someone?” he asks, and she shakes her head.

“No one knows I live here,” she says as she creeps towards the door and looks through the peephole.

When she sees who’s on the other side, she gasps and makes quick work of the lock, pulling it open and ushering Mila inside with a relieved hug.

“Oh my god, I was so worried,” she muses, and Mila sinks into her, threading her arms around Scully’s waist.

“Queenie told me what happened,” Mila replies, tucking her face into Scully’s neck, “she said you lied and told them I was never there. I’m so sorry for what I said to you yesterday, Desi.”

“It’s okay, I understand,” Scully reassures her, pulling back to look at her face.

Mulder clears his throat and Mila looks at him nervously, not having realized anyone else was here.

“This is my partner, Fox Mulder,” Scully introduces, and Mila nods at him, then narrows her eyes and looks back to Scully with a smirk.

“That’s the guy, huh?” she says playfully, and Scully blushes. “Look, Desi, I just came to say goodbye. I’m getting out of town. I just don’t feel safe here anymore. I’m not exactly sure what I’m going to do next, but I know my parents won’t stop looking for me.”

“We know some people,” Mulder interjects, “some friends, who can set you up with a new identity. For real this time, with a new social security number and everything.”

Mila’s expression brightens. “Really?”

Mulder nods. “Let me give them a call, you should be able to pick the documents up in DC this afternoon, if you can make it down there.”

He steps out of the apartment, heading to his car so he can contact The Gunmen, leaving Scully and Mila alone.

“So, I guess Desi isn’t really your name, huh? Or Diane?”

Scully smiles warmly. “My name is Dana. But you can still call me Desi if you want.”

Mila takes both Scully’s hands in hers, looking at them as she talks. “I don’t think I can ever thank you enough for what you did. I’m sure you could get in a lot of trouble if anyone found out.”

“It was the least I could do,” Scully replies. “I was there to help you, it just turns out the kind of help you needed was different than I thought. And you...Mila you changed my life.”

Mila looks up at her with wet eyes. “I did?”

“Yes,” Scully says, her own eyes pooling with tears though her mouth is smiling. “You helped me see myself. It’s the greatest gift anyone has ever given me.”

They look at each other for a moment, and it feels charged, like it did on the couch the other night. This time Scully breaks away, walking to her closet.

“I want you to have something,” she says, pulling down a lock box. “The code is two two three. There’s about fifteen thousand here.” She hands it to Mila, who looks at her with a stunned expression but takes it.

“I can’t take this, Desi. That’s insane.”

Scully shakes her head. “It’s all my tips. I don’t need it, nor do I want it. Please, use it to start over somewhere else. It would make me really happy.”

Mila nods, a soft smile on her lips. “Okay, thank you.”

Mulder returns just then, holding a receipt with notes scribbled on the back. “Okay, Mila, you’ll need to meet someone at the Lincoln memorial at 4:30 this afternoon. They’ll have everything you need and I promise, no one will find you this time.”

“Thank you,” she replies, then turns back to Scully. “I better go.”

Scully walks her to the door and they stand in its open frame, looking at each other for the last time. Scully pulls her into a hug and they linger there, rocking gently. When she pulls back, she doesn’t think, just presses her lips to Mila’s and kisses her twice before hugging her again. “Good luck,” she whispers into her ear, and then Mila is gone. Angel is gone.

Scully pushes the door closed, sniffing hard against her tearing eyes. Mulder is looking at her curiously, a thousand questions in his eyes that he has the good sense not to ask.

“Let’s go back to bed,” she says finally, and he turns his cell phone off this time.

[witchiswriting]

A Not So Merry Christmas Chapter 2

Summary: Negan faces the aftermath.

Warnings: Negan being an asshole, swearing.

Author’s Note: Honestly, it’s my favorite chapter. I had so much fun while writing this. I hope you guys also like it.

Pairing: Negan x Lilith (OC)

When Negan got home, he decided to drown his sorrows in whiskey and gin. He didn’t give a fuck about anything anymore. He only had one goal in mind, and it was getting drunk off his ass and forget everything.

Swallowing the bitter amber colored liquid, he felt the heavy burn sensation in his throat and closed his eyes. He wanted to feel numb. The house was filled with little reminders of Lilith ; pictures on the walls, little crystals on bookshelves, little baubles she loved too much… but the worst thing was her smell. He could still scent it in the living room, drowning in it. That was why he was afraid to go into his bedroom in the first place; it was supposed to be theirs now, this night was supposed to end with them making love between the silk sheets.

As he was throwing the drink out, a loud knock on the door startled him. He was too tired to go check who it was. Besides, he already knew.

While debating if he should answer the door or not, the poundings got louder and louder.

“You have to answer me, Negan! Goddamnit.” Lilith’s determined yells’ are heard through the door and beyond. “Open the fucking door!” Lilith didn’t usually curse, unless she’s really angry.

Negan sighed. He had to face her eventually. So, he decided to do it quickly and get over with it already. He slowly unlocked the door, still hesitant.

When he opened the door, he was ready for almost anything, or at least he thought he’d be. He never could have guessed he could hurt Lilith that much. Her carefully made hair was dishevelled, her make up was ruined, but what made him speechless was the look in her eyes. They were filled with a coldness he had never witnessed before.

He expected to see heartbreak and hatred in them, but they were just empty. The even more unexpected thing was the slap. She slapped him so hard that his already tearful eyes welled up even more.

“Lili…” Negan began with a weary voice but he was cut by her harsh outburst. “Don’t you dare call me that! How dare you!? How could you!? You destroyed us in front of my mother, our friends!” She was fuming with anger.

“Lils, let me explain.” His voice was thick with emotion and he wasn’t trying to hide his tears. He was as heartbroken as she was.

“Shut. The. Fuck. Up! You got a chance to talk at our fucking rehearsal dinner, now, it’s my turn! How could you do this to me!? I thought we were happy and in love! You could have told me before if you didn’t wanna get married! I wasn’t forcing you, was I?! In fact, I was the one who needed convincing! You worked your ass off to make me fall for you and now what!?” Lilith spat out, her words full of agony and hatred.

“I didn’t want to hurt you.” He whispered.

“Fucking rich! Little late for that, don’t you think? How could you destroy us like this? You were telling me about how much you loved me last night…” Lilith couldn’t help but hiccup. Tears were slowly spilling down on her cheeks. ‘’Did you ever love me?’’ She asked, hesitation in her fragile voice.

Negan wanted to hold her and assure her everything was going to be okay. He wanted to take all her pain but he was the cause of it.

He closed his eyes and sighed deeply, pinched his nose, opened his eyes and looked into hers. ‘’I don’t fucking know,’’ he finally let the truth out.

‘’You don’t know?’’ Her lower lip was trembling, it was clear that she was doing everything she could to hold herself together at that moment. ‘’You weren’t even sure about your fucking feelings?!’’

‘’I’m not an easy man. You fucking know that, you knew what you were getting into in the beginning. When we started this relationship I really wanted this, us to work, but apparently it wasn’t destined to be the case for us. We do not belong together.’’ Negan managed to build his walls back all over again.

Lilith was stunned. Her insides were aching with pain. “Sorry that I thought you would get better as a person! You know what, Negan? You are so fucking angry with yourself! You cheated on your wife several times and you thought you could make up for it when she got sick! I’m glad she died! At least she doesn’t have to put up with your cheating ass anymore, she’s free and peaceful! She’s better off without you anyway.” She was screaming with her all power. Bringing up Lucille into this conversation was a low blow but she was too angry to feel bad about it.

“Don’t you ever fucking say her name!” Negan roared, stepping into her personal space. “Get the fuck out before I break you more, little girl.” He growled with a dangerous undertone.

Lilith took a deep breath before saying her last words. “You know what, Negan? You’ll never be happy and die a fucking miserable old man. Someday, you’re going to wish that I was with you but it will be too fucking late before you know it. You don’t know what happiness is and I fucking hate you.” With that she yanked the door open and ran outside. It was her time to not looking back.

Negan closed the door and headed to his bedroom. That was it, Lilith succeeded to make him angry. This time he wasn’t only angry at himself, but at Lilith too; he thought she would be all heartbroken and just pour her heart out but her words were sharp as fucking glass and cut him deeply, so he had to break her in turn.

It was his way of rationalizing things in his head. When he stepped into his bedroom, he couldn’t help but get emotional again. Lilith’s nightgown was on the bed, the room was full of her perfume. He knew what he lost but he was too angry to accept it. If he could blame Lilith for all the things he had done, it would be easier to get better, though he was less than optimistic about him finding happiness ever again.

So, he literally ran out of the room and took the whiskey bottle. This time he didn’t even bother with a glass, drinking right from the bottle.

An hour later, a drunk Negan was thinking about what kind of a man Lilith would find in time. He was sure that she could find someone else and fall in love again. She had so much waiting for her, she was young, but the thought of her with someone else still made the blood in his veins run cold. He blew his chance, yet thinking of her with some other prick still pissed him off.

His thoughts got cut off with another knock on the door. He stood up woozily and headed towards the door, spilling the whiskey in the process.

When he opened the door with a goofy grin on his face, Negan was met with the angry blue eyes of his friend, Rick Grimes. ‘’What the fuck were you thinking, you asshole?’’ Rick practically yelled at Negan. He was seemingly disgusted with his drunken state.

Negan chuckled nonchalantly, offering his friend the bottle in his hand, despite it being nearly empty. ‘’I just fucking dumped some miserable girl, prick. Don’t fucking act like it’s a big fucking deal.’’ He slurred, ‘’Y’know what? She fucking told me that I would never be happy. Fucking bullshit.’’ He started to giggle.

Rick was watching the scene before him with astonishment. ‘’How much did you fucking drink?’’ He asked with a stern voice.

Negan feigned as if he was thinking about something important. ‘’I don’t fucking know but I’m ready to bang a few chicks. Let’s go to fucking a bar and find a big breasted hot brunette.’’ Apparently, he was enjoying himself.

Rick got in Negan’s face. ‘’Do you even hear what you’re fucking saying man? Cut the shit!’’ He shook Negan harshly.

‘’Get your fucking hands off me!’’ Negan yelled and tried to push Rick with all of his power, but he was too drunk to even stand up, let alone anything else.

‘’Would you listen to yourself? You left Lilith alone, you fucking abandoned her like that in front of everyone. Did you even care for her? She was your last chance at happiness, you motherfucking asshole.’’ Rick was practically walking up to Negan.

Negan shrugged like a petulant child. ‘’I don’t fucking care. I’m better off without her.’’ He started to laugh as if he told some funny joke.

Rick was running out of patience. ‘’You know what? She’s better off without you. I don’t know what you are thinking or what kind of fucking monster got into you but you’d better man up or I’ll handle things without you. I’ll make sure that you won’t get near her.’’ His word spilled out of his mouth with anger.

Rick’s words fueled Negan’s rage, almost sobering him up. ‘’What, Prick? You’re gonna try to get into Lilith’s pants now? Well, enjoy my sloppy seconds.’’ He answered with a cocky tone.

Rick couldn’t take Negan’s insults anymore; he punched him in the face, hard. ‘’You’re not even worth it. I considered you my friend, you fucking bastard.’’ He was shaking with anger.

‘’Don’t act like you’re fucking better than me Ricky, your ex-wife cheated on you with your best friend. I knew that you were going after Lilith. Fucking sorry that I loosened her…’’ Negan never finished his sentence as his world was suddenly filled with stars.

When Negan woke up, he was lying on the couch, half of the whiskey spilled on him but he couldn’t bring himself to care. He rubbed his forehead and the memories of this evening started to flash in his mind. He slowly got up and checked his watch, it was past midnight.

He lost his friend just like he lost Lilith. There was no coming back from what he had done and said. He was too far gone. Thinking about what he could’ve had, he slowly walked through the bathroom and washed his face, avoiding to look at the mirror because even the thought of seeing his own face sickened him.

When he got out of the bedroom, the person he’d have the least expected was standing in front of him. Her back was facing him, she was wearing a polka dotted sundress in the middle of December.

Negan felt a strange familiarity but couldn’t put his finger on it…

The figure turned around slowly, ‘’You look more miserable than the day I died.’’ The woman said with a soft smile on her face. She was standing in the middle of Negan’s room and was wearing the outfit she had on when they first met.

Negan froze. He knew that voice. It had been haunting him for years. He swallowed and blinked a few times, trying to wake himself up because surely he was dreaming, right?…

‘’Lucille…’’ he choked on his words.

‘’Hello, Negan.’’ She replied with that sweet tone of hers. Her curly brown hair was around her shoulder and she was looking even more beautiful than he remembered.

‘’Aren’t you…’’ Negan couldn’t finish his sentence. He was dreading the word.

‘’Yes, I’m very much dead but still here.’’ She answered like it wasn’t a big deal. ‘’So, how have you been?’’

‘’Good. You?’’

‘’Don’t lie to me, honey. You know I always see through your lies.’’ Lucille slowly got closer to him and caressed his cheek.

Negan desperately held onto her delicate hand. He was crying silently. ‘’I miss you so fucking much.’’ he whispered.

‘’I miss you too, love, but that’s not what I’m talking about. Lucille smiled softly before got serious ‘’Why did you leave that girl, Negan?’’

‘’Do you know about her?’’ Negan asked with a confused tone.

‘’I know everything about you, love. I know about your relationship with Lilith, I know about what you did to her.’’ Lucille explained with a knowing expression.

Negan shifted uncomfortably. ‘’And you are okay with it? Me being with her?’’

‘’Of course, I am. Though you hurt her badly, my love.’’ Lucille was watching his face with her chocolate colored eyes. ‘’You’re more handsome than before.’’ She smiled softly.

‘’I left her because of what I did. I couldn’t tell her, Lucy, she’s not you and I could never love her as much as I love you.’’

‘’You’re already head over heels in love with her, Negan. She’s your last chance at happiness.’’ Lucille said what Negan dreaded most.

‘’She would never forgive me, Lucille. I screwed things up. Again.’’ He smiled sadly.

‘’First, you need to forgive yourself, Negan. Yes, she’s not me and it would take time for her to forgive you but she loves you. She’d find forgiveness in herself eventually. She cares about you as much as you do for her.’’ Lucille took Negan’s head in her hands and placed a soft kiss on his lips.

Negan held her in his arms and brushed his nose to hers. ‘’It’s too fucking late for that, Lucy.’’ he whispered.

‘’It’s not too late for anything. Make it up to her, find a way to forgive yourself, Negan. You deserve a happy ending.’’ Lucille took a step back.

Negan opened his eyes and looked at her through his tears. ‘’Don’t go, please. I can’t do this without you.’’ He was crying silently.

‘’You can and you will.’’ Lucille turned away from him, ‘’And I forgive you, Negan. We’ll meet again.’’ At that, she disappeared into the night.

When Negan woke up, his head was throbbing. He tried to open his eyes but they were too heavy.

‘‘Fucking hangover’’, Negan thought to himself and slowly opened his eyes.

He wasn’t in his bedroom; instead, he was laying in a king sized, grey sheeted bed and the windows were covered with heavy, dark curtains.

There were mounted animals on the grey walls and the room was furnished tastefully.

He groaned loudly, ‘’I’m fucking dreaming again. Shit, I drank too fucking much last night.’’ He buried his head in his grey pillow and tried to sober up.

Suddenly, the grand wooden door is opened and a man with a pornstache walked in. ‘’Good morning, boss. It’s almost noon, so I thought I should check on you.’’ The man said with an apologetic tone.

Negan was shocked again but he was determined to wake up from this dream or nightmare, probably the latter. So, he asked with a growl. ‘’Where the fuck am I?’’

The pornstached man answered with a surprised but careful undertone ‘’Umm… boss, it’s home, The Sanctuary.

[bound-up-feelings]

Ali G x fem reader

You Is My Bitch

Requested: @333fairies

Warning: Smut, Smut, and more Smut (I will have you know I am so damn proud of this, you don’t understand!)

(Heyo! So this took me longer than excepted, I am very sorry! I have had a busy week so I will be trying to get the rest of my requests out. I hope you like this and if you do please remember to leave feedback, it helps a lot!)

Now you had been living in the area for a good while now and though you didn't have very many friends you still somehow managed to create two good friendships. One was with a guy named Ricky, his friend called him Ricky c. And that friend, also one of yours was named Ali g. He was a very interesting person. He was always talking to you about anything and everything. He would visit you at work with Ricky and it was always the same routine. "Ay y/n! How is your day?" He says everyday when he stops by. Sometimes though he'll say "You talk about how much you hate it here, why don't you leave and come hang with me?" And every time you’d give the same answer. You need this job it was literally the only thing you had that kept you from losing it mentally. Yes Ali was right, you did hate it but it had good pay and nothing really happens. You wanted to go with Ali and Ricky but you had responsibilities. 

But today Ali seemed to be really persistent. "Come on! You is the only friend I got that hasn't taken a ride in my car. You have to." He says as he leans forward and puts his ring clattered hand on top of yours. You sigh out and look around, no client in sight and your boss was most likely passed out in his office. "Well, he's probably drunk off his ass, I guess it will be alright." "Wicked!" He says as he runs outside to wait for you. Grabbing your jacket and other things you walk out. When you get outside you see his yellow car and him inside bouncing around to whatever song he was playing. You walk to the passenger side and open the door. Music blaring you slide into the seat. He turns it down and smiles toward you. "Ready for the best ride ever?" He says giving you a funky smile. You laugh and nod your head. Not that far into the ride, the music was turned up a bit and you both were laughing and having a great time. Until his "rivals" showed up. They wanted to race but he wasn't sure if he should with you in the car. You looked over at him "Well are you gonna race them or what?" He smirks and the race begins. When I say the race was intense but so slow, I mean it was really hilarious. After the "race" you both sat idling at a stop sign. "What we do now? I is bored." He says sighing out loud. "I don't know." "Want to go to me house and listen to my other music?" "Sure." He nods his head and quite literally high tales it to his house. When you both get there you walk in and he is instantly at the stereo system. After the song starts to play he turns to you. "This is my crib, make ya self at home." He says as he goes to sit on his dresser. You sit on his bed. You scoot over and lay back while patting the space next to you. "You want me sit there?" He says as he literally point to himself as if you were talking to someone else. You mutter a short yes and he walks over to you. He sits down and lays back. You both sit in silence as the music plays, neither of you moving or making a sound. He looks over at you, not realizing this you start bobbing your head to the beat of the song. Lip syncing to it as well he starts to look at your lips. Not sure if the moment is right or not he gets up a bit and starts to lean over you. You open your eyes after feeling the bed dip and see him above you. He staring at you, looking at your lips, eyes, neck, and then back at your eyes. No words are spoken, the music is drowning out and the only thing you can hear is his rapid breathing. You open your mouth to say something but nothing comes out. He leans down and places his lips on yours, at first its soft and gentle but then when he gets use to the feeling he starts to put more effort into it. Biting your lip and slipping his tongue into your mouth, You moan in response and wrap your arms around his neck. After doing that he fully seats himself between your legs. Beside the feeling of his joggers against you you can feel his hard on. Rubbing against your clothed area. You bite your lip to suppress the sounds that threaten to escape you. He leans up and starts to take off his jacket and reveals his red shirt underneath, which he also removed. You decided to mimic him and take your shirt off as well, which left you in your bra. He groans as he looks at your chest, getting slightly self-conscious you bring your arms to cover yourself but he grabs them and places them down at your side before leaning down and placing a gentle, sweet kiss to the top of your breasts. "You is beautiful love. Remember that next time yeah?" Next time? There was gonna be a next time. You remember what he said and nod your head to answer his question "Good girl. Now lift that ass up for me." He says as he unbuttons and grabs the side of your pants. You do as your told and he pulls them off in one swift move. Leaning down once again he kisses at your stomach and moves ever so slowly down your body. Reaching the hem of your panties. Instead of doing what he really wants he decides to tease instead. He goes straight to your hip and bites there, definitely leaving a mark in its wake. He smiles and goes to the other side and gives it the same treatment before making his way back. He gets to your neck and kisses all up and down the column of your throat. He even sucks a nice sized mark into your neck that would soon be purple. He slides his hands under you and unclips your bra, pulling it away from your body. You shiver at the sudden air that hits you. He smirks and takes one of your nipples into his mouth. You gasp and grab a hand full of the sheet under you. He swirls his tongue and pulls away and gives the same treatment to the other one. When he pulls away he kisses your lips before scooting off the bed. When he does this he pulls down his pants along with his underwear. You moan at the sight of him. He chuckles at your shocked expression "Don't worry love, I be extra gentle." He says as he grabs your legs and pulls you to the edge of the bed. He smiles down at you as you begin to shake slightly. He cursed under his breath as he walks over to his dresser and begins to search through it. Finally coming back up with a condom and lube. "Almost forgot." He says as he tears open the package before rolling it onto himself. He pours some of the lube onto his fingers before gently running them up and through your lips. You shudder at the feeling and he begins to dip his finger in a bit, stretching you out to help better accommodate to his size. When he feels you've been prepped enough he squirts more lube onto his hand and begins to coat himself. After doing so he runs the tip of his member up and down your lips and pushes into you slightly. You moan at the feeling, you look up at him and see his face. Mouth open wide as he watches himself push further and further into you until he reaches the base. He stays there to let you get use to his size. He leans down and takes your lips with his. You moan as he moves slightly and you wrap your legs lazily around his hips. He places a hand on your stomach and the other moves to hold one of your legs. Slowly he pulls out of you and quickly thrust back in. Doing this quite a few times before he leans up and begins to pick up a pace that was quick, rough, and wanting. This wasn't like all the other times he fucked, this was you, your were special and he wanted this to be special and wanted it to go on as long as he could make it. As he fucked you you could hear the bed making creaking noises and silently hoped that no one would walk in on what was happening. Ali seemed to read your mind "Don't you worry, no one is here, so make all the pretty noises you want!" He says as he punctuates it with a particularly hard thrust that hit you just right. You let out a whimper and a moan follows after. He tilts his head back and lets out a few groans of his own "Fuck...your so fucking tight! You just right for me ain't you." He says as he continues his assault on your g-spot. You cry out as a few of his thrusts hit you in the right places. He takes his hands away from your stomach and leg and places both of them on your breasts. He massages them as he lets out a low moan that makes you let one out as well. The smile that was plastered on his face soon falters as he feels the knot in his stomach tightening "Oh shit...I think I'm gonna cum soon." "Me too...Please don't stop Ali!" He doesn't, yet he speeds his pace up and leans down so he's face to face with you. Kissing you with so much want you can practically taste it. He then starts to repeat the words "Fuck" over and over again. You can feel him throbbing inside of you. He can feel you tightening around him, when your orgasm washes over you, you tighten around him even more, which causes him to let out a strangled moan and then he releases into the condom. He jerks and shudders as he gives a few more sloppy thrust. Then he stills. His face was buried in your neck. He kisses up it and pecks you on the lips before pulling out and with the little bit of strength he has he scoots you up the bed. Walking back over to his dresser he grabs a few tissues and wipe himself off before doing the same for you. After throwing them away he walk back over and pulls a blanket from the ground and over both of you as he lays down next you. Smiling he wraps an arm around you as you snuggle closer into his warm body. The feeling alone makes you sleepy and you close your eyes, while listening to his heartbeat. He kisses the top of your head. "I hope we is gonna do this again. I had fun and I don't want this to change anything between us?" "Why would it change anything. This was amazing." You say as run a hand over his ribs. He smiles and lays his head against yours "Does this mean you is my bitch now?" You lazily look up at him with a 'Are you serious look' He shrugs "I is just wondering, I did just fuck you, so it is now confirmed that you is now my bitch." He says with a serious look. Shaking your head you lay back down. Closing your eyes, he does the same and you both fall asleep.

(Hello again, so like I said before I hope you liked this and if you did please leave feedback it help a lot! Anyways have an amazing dat and stay strong!)

[dnfisgay]

Mr. Loverman - Chapter 1

a/n: hey! welcome to my first fic on here! i kinda feel like i’m back in freshman year writing youtube rpf but hey! we’re all regressing anyway aren’t we? this is a dreamnotfound fic based on the online personas of georgenotfound and dream. this is in no way meant to pressure them or their relationship, and if either of them say they’re uncomfortable with fanfiction i’ll take this down! but anyway at the beginning of every chapter there will be a content warning section and a summary if needed, or if any plot altering events happen during the possibly triggering sections. i hope y’all enjoy Mr. Loverman, a fic based on the song by Ricky Montgomery. 

THIS IS MY OWN WORK. PLEASE DO NOT REPOST ON ANY OTHER BLOGS/SITES WITHOUT PERMISSION. DO NOT REPOST AS YOUR OWN. 

Prologue 

Sometimes, a simple decision is what changes your life the most. Sometimes, a tragedy is a blessing in disguise. Not always, but enough of the time for a few lucky people to benefit. We were some of those people. A simple decision changed... everything. Everyone. Changed me, changed him. Sometimes, we regret those decisions. Other times, they’re the best thing that’s ever happened. We made history together. We made our own history. We changed ourselves for the better. Part of it was born of tragedy, of pain and suffering, of wrong-place-wrong-time. But after, we were born anew. A butterfly emerging from fog. 

The rainbow after a storm. A soft mist at the edge of a violent fall. Our own little refuge within the storm. We made history together, you and me. 

“I've shattered now, I'm spilling out Upon this linoleum ground  I'm reeling in my brain again Before it can get back to you  Oh, what am I supposed to do without you?”

Content Warnings: none 

Word count: 1,520

Chapter One - A New Chapter Of Us

“What if we moved in together?”

George laughed. 

‘What? You’re joking.”

“No! I’m totally serious!” Dream said, laying on his bed. “Think about it. You could get a work visa, come live with me, and we can make videos together! Like vlogs and stuff! You can get away from your family, and I… well I get you! It’s obviously a win-win situation.”

“Vlogs? You don’t even show your face.”

“Oh… yeah. Well, whatever! I’ll do a face reveal. Please, George!”

George’s hesitance showed, making Dream bounce on his knees on the bed, literally begging him.

“Please George! Please!” he laughed, waiting for him to agree. George stayed silent, trying to hide his smile.

“I guess you don’t love me then… oh bother,” Dream fake pouted at him, pretending to cry, rubbing his eyes to make them red. He couldn’t hide the smile in his voice.

“Okay, alright, you wore me down,” George said. “Looks like I’m going to Florida!” 

---

It’d been three months since Dream asked George to move in with him, and every day he’d sent him pictures of their place. Their place. He doesn’t know why that made him so happy to hear, especially coming from Dream. When he showed George the lounge and texted him “our living room :D,”  he felt like his whole entire body was lit ablaze. Like a firework on the Fourth of July -- how American of you already, George, he could hear Dream’s voice saying. It felt like when his first girlfriend told him I love you for the first time. Except... not that. Obviously not that. 

And the day was finally here, after waiting for the visa to get approved, and video chats, and seeing only pictures, it was finally going to be their place. Dream and George’s place. There would be no more lagging video or Discord crashing on them. If the internet went out, he’d still be in the next room over. He’d still be his.

Well, not his. But he’d be there. George felt the need to explain himself even in his own head.

The sound of Dream’s Discord ringer cut through his thoughts, too loud for his own good. He stretched over to his desk and answered, turning his camera on too. 

“Georgie!” Dream said, bouncing with excitement. “Guess what tomorrow is, Georgie.” He leaned forward on his desk, wiggling his eyebrows at George. 

George feigned confusion. “I don’t know, Dream. What’s tomorrow?”

Dream pouted. “Are you being serious right now? Do you really not remember?”

“Dream! I’m literally packing right now!”

“I’m litch-rally packing right now!” Dream mocked, impersonating George’s British accent. George stared him down while Dream was folded over laughing. 

“It’s not too late for me to change my mind, you know.”

“Actually, it is. Work visas have to be used or you’ll get a fine,” Dream said, chewing loudly on what looked like — popcorn? God, Americans were weird. 

“Is that actually true or did you just make that up so I have no choice but to come?” 

Dream looked like a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar. “...Maybe.” George laughed silently, smiling to himself. He would never say it out loud, but he loved Dream. He didn’t know what made him keep it to himself when Dream all but shouted it from the rooftops, but something inside of him felt it was too real to be said. Dream knew it was true, and that was good enough, right? 

“Did you want to watch me pack?” George said, folding another one of his shirts and placing it in the box. Dream wasn’t paying attention. He was messing with something on his desk, his tongue sticking out and his eyebrows furrowed so tightly you could barely see his eyes. George loved his eyes, they were a warm pale green color that fit him perfectly. George snapped his fingers at Dream and asked if he was listening. 

“Huh? Oh. No. I’m sorry,” Dream looked sheepish, worried. “I didn’t— I didn’t mean to, I just zone out sometimes, I’m really sorr—“ 

“Dream, Dream, calm down. It’s okay,” George smiled. “I’m not mad. Did you want me to ask the question again?”

“Please.”

“I asked if you wanted to watch me pack,” he asked, knowing which answer he hoped for. 

“Ooh, can I stay on?” Dream looked giddy as he asked. “I wanna tell you about my new bedwars record.”

“Sounds perfect, Dream.” 

---

It took him two more hours to finish packing up his clothes, bathroom necessities, and shoes, spare for the ones he needed on the plane. Dream had talked on and on for the whole two hours, about bedwars and what he was going to make for dinner, and how his mom sent him over homemade banana bread the other day. And even Patches made an appearance after a while. 

“Oh my God, Patches! I get to meet Patches! You know Dream, I’m kind of more excited to meet her than I am you.”

“Haha, very funny,” Dream cooed. “Not like Patches will make you dinner or comfort you when you have nightmares. 

“Nightmares? I do not have nightmares!” George defended, despite the fact he did definitely have nightmares. And he knew Dream knew that, he’d been the one called at 4 in the morning and the one who talked George back to sleep. It was all part of the game, though, the cat and mouse they had going on. He wondered who was the cat and who was the mouse

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, Georgie. Oh, wait,” Dream smirked, laughing his ass off. George gasped and tossed his dirty shirt at his webcam, not minding the fact that it was still on his body and that he was now shirtless in his cold room. 

“Hey! I wanna see the view! You look sexy with your hair messed up like that.”

“Haha, very funny,” George fake laughed, though Dream didn’t. He usually laughed after jokes like that. What made this one different? “If I wasn’t so bloody cold right now I’d leave it on there. Make you suffer all alone under there.” He heard Dream whimper, and he didn’t know what it was, but it made his stomach churn. “But, I am very, very freezing right now.”

He pulled the shirt off the webcam, covering his chest with the fabric. “There. You have been freed,” he said, slipping his shirt back on. He swore he saw Dream’s eyes linger on the strip of skin still exposed on his stomach before he pulled it down. 

“I’m gonna go make some dinner,” George said, checking the time on his phone. “What, it’s already 9? Jesus. I’ll be right back, I’m gonna go make some cereal real quick, stay on the call.”

George put Dream’s volume loud enough that he could hear it decently from across the flat. Meaning, Dream could also hear him burning himself. 

“Did you just burn yourself? Aren’t you making cereal?” 

“Um…maybe?” he said, shouting over the cold running water. “I may have accidentally left the oven on from when I made salmon last night.”

“Last night?” Dream screamed in horror. “Genuinely, how are you not dead yet?” 

“I don’t know!” he said, wincing and drying off his hand before grabbing his bowl of cereal. Well, it wasn’t a bowl, but a large Tupperware container. 

“Is that Tupperware?” Dream asked as he sat down at his desk. 

“It was the easiest thing to unpack.” 

George ate his cereal in silence for a few minutes, drinking down the last bit of the sugary milk before asking “What were you staring at earlier? When you got distracted.” 

It took Dream a few seconds, but he finally remembered. “Oh! This!” He pulled out a tiny crossbow made of pencils and shot a rubber band at his camera. 

“That’s actually so sick,” George said, staring more intently at his screen to get a closer look. Dream went off on a tangent about it, showing him the mechanics and everything it could shoot. He swore he’d have another one for George by the time he got home. Home. He liked that word coming out of Dream’s mouth. He liked hearing it about himself. 

Eventually, it got too late for George to be up anymore. His flight left in 7 hours and he still needed to pack his PC. Dream pouted when he told him he had to go, but perked back up when he remembered the next time he’d see George, he’d be able to hug him! He was all but forcing his body to get tired after that.��

“Wake me up if you need me, okay?”

“Okay.”

“I love you, Georgie,” Dream smiled. This time, he didn't sound teasing. He sounded genuine, more genuine than he’d heard in a long time. 

“I… admire you too, Dream.” George’s face went flush and hot, his cheeks blotchy with pink and peach. 

“Psh! When are you ever gonna say it back?” 

“Never, I thought we’d been over this.”

“Mark my words, Georgie. I will get you to say it back sooner or later.”

Yeah, right.

---

a/n: so! that was the first chapter of Mr. Loverman! i’d love any feedback and opinions y’all have! the next chapter should be up in a few days, and i even have art from one of my lovely twitter mutuals coming! i hope everyone enjoyed! :D feel free to reblog<3

Chapter 2 - Linoleum Ground (date TBD)

[flatstarcarcosa]

Reese... i am absolutely clueless but i don't WANT to be. so. please explain to me who Zaeed is. i wanna know everything. what's his story. where is he from. what does he do. what is he like. literally use this as an excuse to talk about him at length and also tell me how he came into your life, pls and thank u!!! -heavenshipped

@heavenshipped

he's an old pissy mercenary with a fucked up face, a fat ass, and one good eyeball.

"isn't that just slade?" you may be thinking and the answer to that is........

no, but actually, yes.

also there do be light mentions of drugs and general Junkie ShenanigansTM below

he's a dlc squadmate that shows up in mass effect 2. unfortunately being dlc means there's a lot of content and ideas that were originally cut, and there's not as many dynamic conversations w him as there are with others. he's also not romanceable but it works for selfshipping because any of the romanceable characters (and one other who isn't) are too tied to my shepards for me to ship with them.

i've actually been Looking Respectfully for a while but it was before i started selfshipping so i didn't really do much aside from curse bioware and the home of phobia of not letting us romance him.

i'm still fleshing out the details of our ship but i'm thinking i grew up on earth, it was inherently BadTM so i jumped at the first chance to hit up a colony. it did not go any better, and i just spent a lot of time hopping from place to place, causing mild chaos and abusing Many, Many substances.

when we do meet it's because i was running a con/hustle to get some quick credits, and zaeed thought i was a Literal Child that was about to Get Murdered by some pissed off aliens and intervened. i lost out on my money marks, he discovered i was actually An Adult and it left us in an awkward position of 'well, what now?'

for reasons he cannot immediately parse, he decides to give me a place to crash, initially just temporarily. we're having a grand ol time when i suddenly inform him mid sentence that i may have Taken Too Much and proceed to hit the floor and have a mild drug induced seizure in the middle of his kitchen.

for reasons he also cannot parse, he decides against his initial thought of dumping me in an alley and instead locks me in his bathroom and proceeds to detox my ass after he digs through my bag and sees just how many drugs i have on me.

(later on we pointedly ignore any medical professional who comments that detoxing someone in this way is dangerous as hell and you're more likely to kill them anything else because like. we know. it was fine. move on, we sure did.)

i spend the first three and a half days beating on the bathroom door and telling him all the ways i'm gonna eviscerate him if he doesn't open the door and give me my fucking shit back.

all total it takes about 10 days to clean me out, with him opening the bathroom long enough to make sure i'm at least drinking fluids if i won't eat. withdrawal kills your appetite, and makes you prone to puking for no reason.

the 11th day, i'm sitting at the table in the kitchen of the shitty rental apartment on whatever crappy colony we're on while he scrambles eggs and fries bacon and i ask him why the hell he bothered with any of this.

"beats me," he says. "i'm normally not one for doing anything that doesn't have a payoff in the end."

"i guess it beats waking up behind a dumpster again," i say.

after that we kind of just fall into a natural rhythm with each other, a weirdly comfortable fit despite his usual aversion to others and my inherent skittishness around them.

it takes a while for him to think about it, to realize that maybe it was just the timing of everything. maybe even he of all people was tired of never being able to put anything back into the galaxy. maybe the way i just calmly announced 'oh shit, i'm ODing again', with more annoyance and exhaustion in my voice than panic just stuck out to him. made him think of all the people he's run into before, lost and strung out and on their own.

all of them dead or dying and none of them knowing it yet.

maybe he just wanted to know if he could even keep someone alive, rather than being a walking curse and death sentence for anyone he meets.

maybe he was just lonely, and figured i was too.

he never really settles on one single answer that seems like it fits, and after a while, he figures it doesn't matter. what happened, happened.

and more importantly, it happened exactly the way it needed to, and thats all that really matters.

by the time the events of ME2 start, and commander shepard comes to recruit zaeed, i'm figuring him and i have been together about 5-7 years.

after the events of me2 and 3, and after the reaper war is over, zaeed uses his money he's been hoarding all these years and we buy a plot of land of bekenstein. the only thing on it is a dock on a lake that needs some TLC.

we build a two story cabin bit by bit, and zaeed of course builds a weapons bunker underneath, "just in case". there's a porch on the second story, a hot tub in the back yard, and a fireplace in the living room.

he spends the mornings drinking coffee and watching the sunrise, and the evenings with scotch and a cigar, watching it set, and every time he's amazed the both of us lived long enough to get to settle into something as mundane as this.

there's also stuff obviously related to me2 and 3 that i'm fleshing out of course.

also, this is some of the best content of the whole game and it's a simple fact.

also related to the above video:

i have a cheap ass, well worn, purple plush krogan toy that probably ended up costing him as much as a case of heat sinks and a whole fucking box of other prizes from the same claw machine.

oh!

we both got drunk one time and ended up at a vegas style space chapel, and neither of us have any recollection about it. he doesn't even know until he's visiting the citadel one day and the citadel tourism VI has his name hyphenated to massani-wilson.

"fuckin wot did you just call me?" "records indicate you and reese wilson-massani were married three years ago at-" "the goddamn hell we were-" "-Slicky Rickys Love Shack" "oh goddamn it. well, that explains the matching rings."

i also love the idea this comes out after shepard's recruited him, and shepard is just like

"wait you two have had matching ring for three years and didn't wonder what it was about?" "reese gets sentimental about weird shit, i figured it was just that." "well, cerberus didn't hire you for your critical thinking skills, i guess." "keep talkin' shepard and you'll be learning to do it out your arse." "i do that well enough already." "fair enough."

[queenofthefallenangels]

Think Twice Part 2

"I am going to make sure you never even think of touching my girl ever again. I am going to make sure you wish you never even met her."

Seth Rollins X OC X Jon Moxley 

Rated: M 

Warning: Some violence 

Tag Team: @sithstatlander​ @xladyxfatex​ @awkward-teenaged-girl​ @steadysuitcasepurseranch @themansbliss​ @katelynirwinhemmingsclifordhood​ @strwbrryshrtckexo​ @bluedragonfly678​ @luleelurah @mohawkmama​ @foreverthenerdprincess​ @aujenaeblaze​ @missnena2194​ @suicidepanda07​ @kelseyann2002​ @princessminjikwon​ @nerdgirlsblog​ @multi-stan-kpop​ @redz0mbie​ @thebornalpha @acon1120​ @jonsmoxley​ @chonisberonica​ @goddessofhardrock​ @1dluver13xx​ 

@marismar @vampirepixi​ @dietwrestling​ @asktvhead​ @moxslilangel2020​

Aria’s POV

I sat back at the bar next to Jon. He smiled at me as he handed me a drink. I raised an eyebrow at him. He held his hands up. “It’s clean. I swear.” 

I giggled. “I hope I can trust you. I am a lightweight regardless.” I took a sip of the drink. I spit it back up. He chuckled at my reaction to the drink. It was so fruity. I couldn’t even taste the alcohol in it. “What is this? It’s horrible.” 

“Sex on the beach. I was checking if you weren’t trying to just impress someone with your drink choices.” 

“If I was,” I asked. “What were you going to do if I drank this whole thing down?” 

“Buy you another.” He shrugged laughing. I shook my head. 

The night carried on. It almost felt like I had known him before with how comfortable I felt around him. I didn’t even need the alcohol. I had made him order me a beer to replace the sex on the beach. He obliged and got me the same as his. It was stronger than the Bud Lights I was used to, but I liked it. I felt happier than I had in a long time as the night rolled on. We stayed at the bar till the bartender called for the last call. That was when Jon turned to me with a smile. “Shall I get you home?” I smiled and nodded, taking his hand. I couldn’t deny the knots that turned in my stomach as I took his hand. He wasn’t going to want...well, of course, he was, a man like this had to...He could have had any of those girls at the bar. 

We walked together out the door. I was expecting him to pull out his keys, but he never did. We just kept walking. “Um, don’t you have a car here?” I asked him. 

“No, I live nearby. I walked here to avoid DUIs. We aren’t exactly sober enough to be driving. You can spend the night if you need to or wait for an Uber at my house. I think it’s a bit safer. You never know who is lurking around.” 

“What if you are the creep I need to be hiding from?” I teased. 

“Well, if I am such a creep why are you still walking with me?” He winked as we kept walking. I felt the heat rise on my cheeks. We walked a bit before I spoke again. 

“I don’t live that far from here either. I could probably walk from your house.” 

“Where do you live?” He asked. 

I pointed towards Alexa’s apartment. “Well, it isn’t my place. I am looking for a place of my own. I just kind of got out of a relationship.” I said awkwardly as I rubbed the back of my neck. “My friend is letting me stay with her until I can find a place of my own. It’s just passed the gas station.”

He nodded, “I live near there. Maybe a couple of blocks south near the auto shop where I work. I will walk you home. I can’t let a pretty girl walk home alone. Can I?” His tone was really flirty even after what I had just let loose.

“You aren’t scared away by the fact that I just got out of a relationship?” He shrugged, “It takes a lot to scare me away. Besides, wouldn’t that mean I was trying to be in one with you. Someone is jumping really far ahead.” I blushed again brightly. “I am so sorry.” I looked down feeling embarrassed. Maybe I read him all wrong. He is just being a nice guy. The whole idea of meeting a guy at a bar was a foreign idea.

He stopped us, “You are fine. Really. I am just teasing. Trust me, you seem like a great girl. I don’t want to screw anything up by rushing into things you aren’t ready for.” He kissed my hands. “I just want to get to know you. I wasn’t even going to try any moves on you.” 

I felt like I was in another universe with his words. Sure, Seth said romantic things...normally after I caught him doing something he wasn’t supposed to do or after a huge fight. The way Jon said, it didn’t sound like his way of getting me in the bed.  He sounded so sincere. I didn’t want to question it. I just for once want to believe that a guy wanted me for who I really was on the inside. Not just because of my looks or of any other part of me. 

“So, you work as a mechanic?” I asked him, changing the subject. 

He nodded, “It is still somewhat of a new auto shop in town. We still get a bunch of customers. What do you do?” 

“I am nothing special really. Just a secretary, currently. I sometimes miss working at the gym. It was more fun, but I couldn’t work there anymore after my dad passed.” Sure, Aria, just drop that huge bomb on him. I was really going to test him on what he could take. 

“What happened to your dad?” He asked. 

“He had a heart attack. He was really sick for a while. He couldn’t stop fighting. He used to be one of the biggest fighters in the underground world. Not sure if you know about it. It is like wrestling, but fewer rules.”

“More blood.” Jon chimed in. “I know of it. I am one too. Your father must have been Ricky Lee Meyers.” 

“How do you-”

“He’s a legend. Every fighter in this town knows who he was. A lot of people miss him even his enemies.” 

“Yeah,” I looked up to the stars, a single tear stuck in my eye. He stopped looking at me. He whipped the tear from my eye. “I miss him the most. He was the only family I ever had. After he passed, all I thought I at least had was my ex but it turns out, I didn’t even have him. I honestly have never felt so alone when I found out I didn’t even have him. It’s like being in a room full of people, but none of those people can see or hear you.”  

“I am so sorry, kitten.” He said, pulling me close. He kissed my head as he held me for a moment longer. 

“What did you call me?” “I am sorry, do you not like to be called that?” 

“No...just been a while since I heard anyone call me that. It’s nice.” I smiled at him. I put my head into his chest. It was nice to feel like I could let my feelings out with someone. Even if it was someone I just met. 

He grabbed my phone and took my finger to unlock it. He typed something into the phone before handing it back. “You can call or text if you ever need to talk...or you at least want to talk. I don’t sleep much so I can probably answer whenever. Unless I am in a fight which is just mostly weekends. I will respond when I can.” 

I smiled up at him as I called the number so he could get my number. “Thank you. For everything tonight even the nasty ass drink. It means a lot to me. I really needed this.”

He smiled back at me, “It’s nothing, kitten.” He leaned in a bit. His eyes were moved from mine down to my lips. I could feel my heart racing as time moved slowly as his head leaned in. His lips captured mine. The sparks flew from my lips. He deepened the kiss pulling me closer to him, his hands resting on my hips. I wrapped my arms around his neck. 

Suddenly a light came on, pulling us apart when I jumped in alarm. It was the light outside the apartment building. Alexa must have seen me and turned it on because it flickered after a bit. I looked back at Jon. “I think my roommate is trying to call me back in.” 

He nodded. “Always has to be someone to ruin the kiss. Have a goodnight kitten.” He kissed my head before I walked back into the building. 

Jon’s POV

 I sat outside the steps for a moment longer after she had gone in. I couldn’t believe anything of what had happened tonight. From meeting into the bar to the walk home. I could have never imagined this would have gone so well. 

 I knew all of it. Everything she had just told me and more. I couldn’t let her know that. I know building a relationship on lies was never a good thing, but I had no choice. If she knew who I was before… She would never want to be with me. I know she doesn’t fully remember that night I turned against everything I thought I stood for. I knew lies had been put in place of the memory. Whatever Seth and the others had cooked up to hide their own guilt.  It was something I had to do. I had to change my name. Change my look, and start a new life. I couldn’t get Aria out of my head. I wanted to give her up. I knew Seth would never ever release his hold on her. He sure did have a tight one, but I could tell it was loosening. He only had himself to blame for that one. 

I heard a ‘snap’ of a twig from behind me.  I whirled around as I faced the noise. Whatever made the noise quickly went back into the shadows. I didn’t have to see the noise to have a pretty good idea what or rather should I say who caused it. Seth had minions running around for him everywhere. It shouldn’t surprise me he had one right outside the girl’s house Aria was staying at. I knew it wouldn’t be long before Seth would find out that I was back around and going after Aria. I could almost picture his face when he got the news. I love Aria, but getting back at Seth was a nice part of this.    

---The Next Week---

Seth’s POV

My blood had boiled all weekend long that once Monday rolled around I knew what I had to do. I had the perfect plan. Well, most of the way. I was going to confront him about Aria. Tell him, he better backs the fuck off. He should know who he is messing with. 

I walked start into the American Nightmare Autoshop. I walked up to the woman at the front desk. She smiled sweetly at me. “May I help you?” Her nametag read Kris on it. II shook my head. “ Jon Moxley, I need to speak to him?” “He’s at lunch. Can I take a message for you?” She asked sweetly. 

I shook my head. “I will just go in and see him now. Thanks.” I said as I walked on by. She tried to stop me, but I was too fast. I was already at the table where Jon was eating his meal. He looked up at me as I walked in. A small smirk played on his lips. I should have known he knew I was coming. This boy was always in line with my thinking or three steps ahead. Lately, he has been three steps ahead by showing up at that date the other night after not being around for a year. As far as I knew, he had fallen off the grid. I couldn't be happier that he was gone. Now, he just suddenly appears. Something was up and I really wanted to know how he knew she was going to be there. 

“Don’t worry, Kris, he’s an old friend of mine.” He said shooing the girl away. I could hear the other mechanics working in the shop as I sat down across from him. He didn’t offer me the seat, but I wasn’t going to wait for it. 

“What do you think you are doing?” I ask him. 

“Eating a sandwich.” He smiled innocently. “But I guess you are meaning with Aria. Last I checked she was doing this out of her own free will.” 

“Why? Why now? You sat and waited for years to make you move on her. Why? Also, how did you know that we had broken up?”

Jon sucked the mayo off his thumb. “I am pretty sure you know why, Seth. As for how...Let’s just say that I have my sources and leave it at that.”

I put both my hands on the table glaring at him. His eyes met mine. We held eye contact for a moment before I spoke again. “Stay the fuck away from her.” 

“I’ll stay away from her if she asks me to. She asked me to go on a date with her and I am going to go. You aren’t her father or her boss, so stop acting like it. You just can’t stand the fact that she might actually want me. You could have maybe been able to get rid of any other guy that she tried to date as you have in the past. You know though, I won’t be as easily beaten. I waited all those years for a chance and I will be taking it.”

I growled softly as I knocked the sandwich out of his hand. I stuck my finger in his face. “I am warning you. Stay. Away. Don’t make me do something I will regret.”

Jon raised an eyebrow in pure amusement. He stood up a bit to meet my face. “What are you going to do to me? Get those goons you had the other night beat me up as they did to Kevin. Beat me with a steel bat. I am not scared of you. I know what you are made of.”

“She’s mine,” I said slowly, my eyes not leaving his. 

“You have a funny way of showing it. Do you even love her for the person she is or do you just like having her as property?”

 “Shut up, I wouldn’t expect someone like you to understand. You can’t even tell her who you really are. I bet you told her all about how you are Jon Moxley like Dean Ambrose never existed. Like you didn’t know her before.” 

“Just the same as you never told her how you played a part in her father’s death. Funny, how you can be loyal to everyone, but the girl you call the love of your life. You are a true piece of shit, Seth.”

“I figured you of all people would understand the things I had to do.” “Oh, I understand perfectly. “ Jon said, shaking his head as his focus went back to his lunch. I growled softly. I could feel the anger burning inside me. I couldn’t take it. It was just like him to bring up the past as a way to justify what he was doing. He was the one that ran off. He abandoned not only me but Aria and now he was going to play as if he was somehow superior to me. I took the table and flipped it over. “You know what Dean, Jon whoever the fuck you are. How do you think your date will go if I tell her who you really are?! That you lied to her.” 

He finished the last few bites of his sandwich. His eyes glaring at me. He moved forward, “I could easily tell her the whole truth about her father’s death. She wouldn’t even be able to look at you ever again.” 

“She would never believe you.” 

“What makes you so sure she will believe you in who I really am? You spent most of the relationship lying and cheating. How would she know this is the truth? Don’t you think you hurt enough anyway? Let her go already.” 

“To you? You want me to let her go to a lunatic like you! That is fucking rich. Did you get brain damage or something?”

“At least my lunatic self knows how to treat her properly unlike you.” Our foreheads were touching at this point. I took this moment to push him back. He stumbled back a bit. “Is that all you got, princess?” He asked challenging me before he launched forward towards me pushing back causing me to fall back on the table behind me. “You should know by now, I am not scared to fight you. It’s pretty dumb to come to my place of work and try to pick a fight though. Even if you get the upper hand, I got others in the back waiting to kick your ass.” I just noticed that his coworkers had started to crowd around as soon as we had started yelling. I was sure they heard everything and none of them were on my side. I worked for the rival that they wanted nothing better than to destroy. I hadn’t come with any back up in the building, so it was me against all of them. Any idiot could see the problem here. 

My eyes moved back to him. “This isn’t over,” I said before letting myself out of the building. I pulled out my phone as soon as I got out. He was right about one thing. She would never believe me of who he truly was. I also risked him telling her a secret that would kill her. As much as I wanted to believe he wouldn’t be so cruel, I didn’t want to risk putting it past him. 

Seth to Aria: You need to stay away from this Jon guy. He will do nothing, but hurt you. 

Aria to Seth: Like you? 

Seth to Aria: Just listen to me, please. Be careful with him. 

[s1cparvism4gna]

PuNK

WARNINGS: SMUUUUT, cursing

Pairings: Rafe Adler x OC

Tags: @desertvvitch , @courtenbae , @tiecladartist

Author’s Note: I’m now going to be posting my fic chapters on this blog instead of the other. As always, let me know if you’d like to be tagged 💕 enjoy! 😉

Chapter 6

Lyric’s POV

The next week at work was… strange to say the least. First of all, I’d never been so well rested. Second, I had gotten a call from the dive bar that some fancy guy came in and bought all the Floral and Fading tee shirts. All of them. ‘Who needs 150 band tees? That are the same….’ I thought. I tried not to think much of it but we made a lot of money from it. Enough to get groceries and laundry done and enough to splurge on getting my nails done for Italy (which I still couldn’t believe I was even going!). The third reason, which was the strangest of them all, was Rafe. He was acting weird. And by weird, I mean he’d been smiling more and saying his morning greetings pleasantly. Instead of yelling bloody murder when he asked things of me, he’d temporarily step out of his office to physically look at me and pose his questions. And he’d say things like “please” or “would you mind”.... I was almost convinced he’d been abducted by aliens and replaced with a clone. He would let me go home early, he would extend my lunch breaks, and he even invited me to join him at lunch. On more than one occasion. To which I immediately but politely declined. It was too much too soon. It felt like a trap.

By the time Thursday rolled around, I had everything packed to go. The air in the office was as normal as always. Everyone was tired and complained about how shitty their morning was. Everyone but my coworker Winter who was solely interested in Rafe and I’s upcoming trip to Italy. But for all the wrong reasons…

“I just think he might have a little crush on you is all.” She said, scribbling in her journal and typing up something in her computer. I snorted rather loudly as I sipped on my coffee.

“That’s bullshit if I ever heard it—”

“Just hear me out!” She exclaimed, low enough for only the two of us to hear. She stood from her desk and scuttled over to sit on the edge of mine. I leaned back into my seat, legs crossed and lips pursed to keep myself from bursting into laughter.

“Please. I would love to hear your reasoning.” I said, awaiting her answer as if I was waiting for the punchline of a joke to kick in. She pushed her blonde hair behind her ears and leaned towards me.

“First of all, it’s really not that far off. He relies on you to get shit done around here. If you weren’t here, he’d be a wreck, this office would be a mess, and half of us would lose our jobs. Two! You haven’t even seen how he’s been looking at you lately—”

“He doesn’t see me—” I interrupted briefly, tugging on the collar of my light pink turtleneck and sipping my coffee.

“Bullshit. The other day when you two were in a meeting, you got up to do something for Mr. Ackles and I looked up for a split second, glanced in the conference room…. I swear to God, he could not stop staring at you. I mean everywhere you moved in the room, his eyes were on you.” She said to me. I crinkled my brows and opened my mouth to refute but truthfully I didn’t know what to say.

“I’m his assistant! He’s probably making sure that I don’t fuck up—” She made a face for me to shut up. So I tilted my head as she continued.

“And let's be real about this: we can not act like he’s not the most attractive man in the building.” She winked at me, looking around to make sure he wasn’t around. She wasn’t wrong. Rafe was very attractive. I just never stared long enough to be under his thrall. And I never would. He was much too uptight for me. “Ricki, look. You’re 32. You’re not gonna get any younger. And that punk act you’ve got going on isn't gonna last forever.” I scoffed, trying my best not to be offended. I put blood, sweat, tears, money, and sleep loss into my musical career.

“Wow…” I laughed, blinking at her a bit.

“Not saying that you won’t make it but… isn’t that type of music generally for the younger crowd?” She asked me. She wasn’t really helping herself.

“Keep on callin’ me old, Winter….” I warned her in a half joking tone.

“I just think that if it turns out that he really does like you, you’d be stupid to not at least try it out—”

“Okay, you know what? I don’t care how he looks at me. The man dramatically spits out coffee if it’s not the right temperature. Why do I need that kinda stress in my life?”

“Because he’s rich.”

“I don’t care about that. He’s a shitty person.” I said simply, ending the conversation as I grabbed a file from behind her and opened it to read. She gave a frustrated sigh and crossed her arms, looking at me in disappointment. I glanced up from the file and she was still standing there. “Was that all?” I asked in a slightly bitchy tone. She shook her head.

“You’re unbelievable.” She said, smacking the back of my head playfully and sitting at her desk.

“Unbelievably SICK!” I retorted, flipping her off momentarily and she chuckled. Just then, Rafe came stalking into the office.

“Good morning, Mr. Adler!” Winter greeted, like the kiss ass she tended to be. But he ignored her.

“Ms. Lewis, could you meet me in my office please?” He asked as he quickly walked by.

“Yes s-” Before I could even finish my answer, his door slammed shut. I blinked, unsure of what to even think. He was happy all week… ‘I hope he’s still happy…’ I thought as I stood. Winter and I exchanged glances and I entered his office. He was scarily quiet, his hands gripping onto the edge of his desk until his knuckles were white. His briefcase laid sprawled out on the floor; I assumed he tossed at the couch and it didn’t make it. I carefully closed the door behind me and walked towards his desk. Once again, I couldn’t help but ask. I rested my hands on one of the seats in front of his desk and crossed my ankles, taking a deep breath before speaking.

“Are you okay?” I asked. He gave a deep sigh before curling his fingers into fists and punched the desk for a second. I jumped at the sudden noise as he sat down.

“No, Lyric. I’m not okay. I was but not anymore.” He answered through gritted teeth.

“What happened?” I sat down in the seat I was leaning on, smoothing out my skirt as he paced behind his desk. He began with a huff, already seeming more irritable the more he dwelled on it.

“Tell me… have you been keeping up with Samuel by any chance?”He asked as calmly as possible. I gave a nervous chuckle.

“What- do you think we keep tabs on each other like teenagers?” I answered. Truthfully, I hadn’t seen him in a very long time. I was almost disappointed. Almost. Rafe’s cheeks seemed to turn a faint pink for a moment as his poker face faltered a bit.

“No, no- I just…. I figured since you two were so close in the office that maybe you kept in touch...” he replied in a boyish tone.

“Are you jealous?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood a bit clearly he wasn’t feeling it.

“Lyric, please… This is serious.” His tired green eyes locked with mine and I could immediately see that whatever the problem was was truly stressing him out. So I gave him a break.

“No. I haven’t heard from him.” I told him. He hummed at my answer and scratched at the stubble that attempted to appear on his chin. “Rafe, what’s going on?” I asked, beginning to feel concerned. He seemed to be doing a few breathing exercises before he answered.

“It seems that some of my research has gone missing.” He said, holding onto the back of his seat for dear life.

“And you think Sam took it?” I asked.

“Well he is a thief, after all… I wouldn’t put it past him.” he grumbled, putting his head in his hands. My eyes widened.

“No shit.”

“Yes shit. He didn’t just magically come out of thin air. I…” he paused to carefully choose his words. “I bailed him out.”

“Oh. Shit…. How long was he in for?” I asked. I couldn’t believe it.

“14 years…” he replied, running his fingers through his hair.

“For stealing?! What did he steal?! The Hope Diamond?!”

“Oh no he uh…. he killed a guard on the inside.” He mumbled.

“HE WHA- he what?!” I snapped.

“Yeah. Congratulations. You were flirting with a murderer.” He said in a sassy tone. I chuckled and denied it.

“No… I wasn’t...flirting-”

“You were just being friendly?” He said. I smirked at him.

“Oh piss off!” I said, playfully hitting his forearm. I half expected him to look at me like I was crazy but he just smiled small and huffed in frustration, resting his forehead on his desk.

“Ugh this is the fucking worst…” he said. “I bet he’s on his way to Italy for that cross now.”

“Okay cool- but it’s an auction. Last I checked he was broke as hell and the security will be so tight…. So don’t worry about it, okay?” I said, calmly. He searched my eyes for a moment and nodded. His shoulders dropped and he seemed a bit more at ease. I put a comforting hand over his and ran my thumb over his knuckles. “It’ll be fine. We are going to go to Italy, sip some wine, eat some pizza, and get all dressed up for this auction. And you’re going to walk out of the estate with this cross. I’m manifesting it. I am putting it into the ether.” I said as positively as possible. His eyes never left mine and his grip had tightened a little in my hand.

“Of all the fine cuisine that Rome has to offer, you still want... pizza?” He chuckled in amusement.

“Of course! I want real Italian pizza, okay? With melted mozzarella and fresh tomato sauce and all the seasonings! Not one from down the street...or a frozen box.” I said and the look he gave me shocked me. His eyes seemed to trace over every feature of my face and his cheeks faintly blushed again. For a second I began to wonder if this is what Winter saw. This look that he was giving me right now. That shy look of longing. He smiled and retrieved his briefcase, sitting it on his desk as he avoided my gaze.

“Very well. I’m sure there’s a decent pizzeria around.” He said, taking a seat.

“Yes!” I exclaimed as I stood to leave. “So remember! Don’t worry. You’ve got this all under control.” I said, backing out of the office. And with that, I went back to my own desk. I sat down with a sigh. I couldn’t shake the look he’d given me. I suddenly hated Winter for making me notice it. Something about him was no doubt changing and I was interested to see what. I sipped on my coffee and continued to work until the day was out.

Finally, it was time to go. I pulled my suitcase from under my desk and dragged it to sit next to me. The office had gone home for the day and my last order of business was to leave Winter instructions on what to do in our absence. I was literally shaking with excitement. I’d never been anywhere outside the country before. I couldn’t wait for a bit of warm weather. I was freezing my ass off here. Rafe seemed to keep his cool since I talked to him last and to be completely honest, I was glad about it. The last thing we needed was his temper on a whole 9 hour flight. After a while, he appeared from his office and closed his door behind him with a tired smile.

“You ready?” He asked me. I shot up from my seat and threw on my trench coat, making sure I had everything together.

“Absolutely!” I grinned.

“Allow me.” He said, lifting the handle of my suitcase and dragging it along behind him. I was surprised at him. I always knew he was a gentleman but I’d never been on the receiving end of it before.

We walked to the elevator that took us to the rooftop and waiting for us, on and ready, was the big white company plane. I stopped for a second as I watched Rafe board the plane to just appreciate the experience I was about to have. “Are you coming or are you just gonna stand there?!” I suddenly heard Rafe shout to me above the deafening engines, tearing me from my thoughts. I nodded and ran towards the plane, trying not to twist my ankles in the tall heels on my feet. He stretched out a hand to me and helped me up the small flight of stairs. We were greeted by the pilot and a stewardess and shown to what was pretty much a lounge on this plane. The interior of it all was absolutely gorgeous. There were lavish beige recliner seats and a couch to match. Portable desks were made cherry oak with golden cup holders and the carpets were a deep wine red with gold accents. Red curtains covered the windows and there were even decorative pillows and blankets— everything was made to match. When I sat down, the stewardess came in and immediately began asking us if we wanted food or drinks… or alcoholic beverages.

“We’ll take dinner here.” Rafe answered before I could even open my mouth. “I’m sure you’re starving by now, right?”

“Uh… yeah.” I whispered, shedding my jacket and sitting on the couch.

“What do you want?”

“What would you recommend?” I asked, truly unsure of what I wanted.

“Jack back there makes this roasted garlic chicken with vegetables that’s just… magic.” He chef’s kissed the air and I widened my eyes with a giggle, sitting back in my seat. I’d never seen Rafe so expressive.

“Well then I’ll have that!” I smiled. I watched him grin as he began loosening his tie, undoing a few buttons and rolling up the sleeves of his collared shirt, putting in an order for a seasoned fish and potatoes.

“Very good, sir. May I get the two of you started on drinks?”the stewardess asked.

“Chateau Margaux Red, in a chilled glass please.” He answered, opening and reaching into his briefcase to pull out a few folders and a pen. Then she turned to me.

“And for you, miss?” She asked with a kind smile.

“Um…. whiskey?” I answered vaguely.

“Is there a brand you prefer?”

“Um….. no. I usually just order whiskey and I get... whiskey.” I giggled nervously, scratching my head. In the corner of my eye, I could see Rafe smile a little, his shoulders bouncing from a light chuckle.

“Get her a glass of Glenfiddich.”He said and the two nodded at each other in agreement.

“Two glasses…. maybe three.” I corrected him and he laughed again.

“Yes,ma’am. I’ll be back shortly. We should be in the air in about 10 minutes.” She told us as she gave me a smile. I returned it and sat back on the couch, my fingers tapping on the arm. I was nervous about flying, I’d never flown before. But I couldn’t let him know that.

“You okay?” He asked suddenly.

“Yeah…. just… really want a cigarette…”

“Hmph. I didn’t know you smoked.” He said casually.

“Uh yeah…. I’m tryin’ to quit.” I mumbled.

“Well good. That shit does fuck all for your lungs anyway.” He said and I nodded with a smile. He just kept on surprising me. Ever since we left the office, it was like he’d become a different person. I’d never heard him swear so much leisurely. “So um, I still have a bit of work to do before we touchdown in Italy. I’m gonna have my earpiece in so—”

“Of course! I can be quiet.” I chimed. He just chuckled.

“After dinner, Lyric.” He smiled.

“I knew that.” I mumbled in embarrassment.

Just as the stewardess said, we were in the air in no time and starting our flight to Rome. We held a light conversation over dinner, sort of like an ice breaker. Contrary to what I originally thought, he was actually kind of funny. Or “punny” rather. We talked about work, people in the office, how he couldn’t stand his meetings with certain people and we had a list of them that we both agreed were the absolute worst people; for similar reasons too. Afterwards, he delved into his work and I curled up on the couch, playing a few games on my phone as I listened to music, continuously drinking glasses of whiskey until I couldn’t feel my face. I couldn’t help but take a few glances at him as he worked though. The veins in his forearms that bulged as he scribbled on papers and the sharp angle of his jaw as he threw his head back when he was exhausted or frustrated was hypnotizing to say the least. The muscles in his chest making themselves present beneath his collared shirt and vest, the few strands of hair that tended to fall out of place by the end of the workday, his striking green eyes… ‘Stop it, Ricki. It’s Rafe. It’s your boss. You shouldn’t look at him that way…. Why are you even looking at him that way?!’ I thought suddenly. I scoffed and turned my phone off to close my eyes; maybe I could get a nap in somewhere on this flight. Before I knew it, the warmth of the food in my stomach, the low vibrations of the plane, and the comfort of the couch paired with the multiple drinks I had seemed to be enough to send me to sleep. Then I began dreaming…

I was in the office. It was after hours by the looks of things. When I turned in my seat, the workroom was empty, all the desk lamps were on and I was the only one there. Looking down, I was dressed in a simple white collared shirt and a pencil skirt that seemed to be a tad shorter and tighter than normal. But it didn’t phase me one bit. Hard rock music played off of my speaker rather loudly and there was an unfinished email typed up on the computer before me. I sighed and turned around to continue working when I heard Rafe’s voice calling me. “Ms. Lewis, I need your assistance please!” He yelled. Like always, I groaned loudly and went stomping towards his office. When I walked in, he was sitting behind his desk with his legs kicked up on the edge. His hair was disheveled as I secretly realized I liked, the buttons on his vest undone and his tie loosened, the cuffs of his sleeves rolled off of his wrists displaying a fancy watch. I leaned into the doorway and placed a hand on my hip with a touch of attitude.

“What do you want, Rafe?” I asked, completely out of character. If I ever answered him like that for real, I would probably be fired. But instead of yelling, he just let his eyes run over my body, biting his lip with intrigue. I cocked my brow and crossed my arms, tapping my foot impatiently as a devious smile flashed across his face. My heart skipped a beat as he took his feet off the desk and turned his attention to his computer.

“I’m having a bit of trouble getting this PDF to open. Would you mind…?” He asked me. I blinked at him a moment and sighed.

“Yeah. Seeing as I have to do everything else for you.” I replied in annoyance. I started over to his desk and he moved out of the way. Not necessarily standing up, more like just rolled his chair away from the computer. I leaned over as he rested his head in his hand on the desk, so obviously gawking at me as I typed away. Suddenly, he reached out and pushed a lock of hair over my ear, his finger stroking my jaw and his hand running over my shoulder then down my back. His touch caused a stir in me and I let out a shaky sigh but I continued to work. The file wouldn’t open. It didn’t make any sense. I did what I would’ve done on my own computer. I opted to try again.

“What is it that Samuel has that I don’t?” He asked me suddenly, his hand rubbing circles at the small of my back. I was taken aback and snapped my head to stare at him. The look on his eyes was something hungry and needy; like he was trying to hold back from doing something.

“I… um—”

“What can he give you… that I can’t?” He asked, his hand slipping past my hips and over the rounds of my ass. My heart began to race as his fingers traced down the back of my leg. I almost went weak when he graced over the sensitive spot just above the back of my knee. His touch was so electrifying that I could barely think. He chewed on the inside of his cheek as he watched my reactions carefully.

“He… I don’t—”

“You don’t even know do you?” He seemed to smirk as his fingers ghosted over my inner thigh, slipping by the split in my skirt a bit. He gripped onto my thigh tightly and as he stood, his fingers brushed over my clothed clit. “Do you even want him? Hm?” He breathed into my ear, pulling my hair off of my neck and letting his nose trace my jawline. I had forgotten what I was even doing in his office to begin with since he started touching me. I took a slow and deep breath as his cold lips pressed against the warm skin of my neck. I closed my eyes with a shiver as he began massaging my through my panties. “Answer me, Lyric.” He demanded, slapping my ass rather harshly. I gasped from the contact and my hands began to shake in excitement.

“Rafe, I—”

“Mr. Adler…” he corrected me.

“Mr. Adler, I don’t know what you mean…” I sighed.

“I’ve seen the way he looks at you. The way you look at him… Why don’t you look at me that way, huh?” He asked, lifting my skirt as he stood behind me, running his hands over my ass gently. “Do you have any idea what you do to me, Ms. Lewis?” He groaned as he pressed himself against me, his hands now firm on my hips as he pulled me close to feel his growing hard-on. As he ran his hand up my spine, I felt my back arch for him. He continued to spank me until my cheeks turned red and the cool touch of his fingertips eased the pain. His fingers hooked around the hem of my panties and yanked them down my legs. He used his foot to kick my legs apart and carefully scooped up and handful of my hair, pulling on it a bit. He ran a chilling finger up my slick cunt and licked his fingers for a taste. He moaned in my ear as I let out shallow breaths.

“Just as I thought. You taste delicious…” He said and he continued to stroke my wetness until I was all worked up and began to finger me roughly. I was left groaning in need.

“Mr. Adler… please…” I whimpered, his fingers diving in and out of me.

“What’s that, sweetheart?” He asked in a deep alluring tone.

“Please fuck me—”

“Please fuck me, who?”

“Mr. Adler! Please fuck me, please!” I cried out. With a frustrated grunt, he pushed everything off of his desk, not caring about the mess and laid me down. He undid my blouse and cupped my breasts, leaving sloppy kisses all over my chest and he undid his belt. I didn’t see it but boy could I feel it as he entered me. He sucked on my nipples a while as I got used to his size and his hand travelled up to my neck, squeezing lightly as he began to move. He kept it slow, drawing out the feeling of my clit dragging along his length. I couldn’t keep myself from whining as he rolled into me.

“Fuck me harder.” I said suddenly. “Please fuck me harder, Mr. Adler.” I moaned, staring him right in the eyes. He gave an almost evil chuckle as he removed his tie from his neck and wrapped it around my wrists tightly, pushing my arms above my head. He hiked up my legs to wrap them around his waist and he began to drive into me. He hovered over me, staring into my eyes with so much lust and want as I squealed and moaned beneath him. He alternated between slow and fast paced, ramming into me until I felt myself beginning to come undone.

“Keep it up and you’re going to make me cum, Lyric.” He growled through his teeth, resting his forehead against mine with a satisfied lightly dimpled smile. And it was a damn gorgeous one at that.

“Cum in me. I want you to…” I shuddered. He laughed tiredly, cupping my cheeks with his surprisingly soft hands and kissing me deeply.

“Whatever you want…” He said darkly, his hand dragging from my cheek to my neck again. And this time he used both hands to choke me gently. He snapped his hips into me repeatedly, tears beginning to well in my eyes as I started to see stars.

“I’m gonna… I—” Just as I was about to release—

I felt a hand run down my shoulder, gently shaking me awake. When I opened my eyes, I was met with those striking greens and I gasped in embarrassment, moving away. Rafe has woken me up, sitting on the edge of the couch with a tired smile.

“Sorry! Didn’t mean to scare you.” He said kindly as I sat up, a thick fabric falling off of my shoulders. He’d covered me with his jacket. My heart raced under his touch and I could feel my face burning as I looked into his eyes. “We’re about to land. I figured maybe you’d want to see the sky view.” He told me, pointing to the window behind my head. I turned my head to see a beautiful sunrise over what looked to be the Colosseum. I gasped and rose to my knees like a child to get a better look. All of the beautifully sculpted buildings and the bluest waters…

“This is amazing…” I said unknowingly.

“Wait until we actually get into the city.” He said in a soft tone of wonder similar to mine. I looked over at him and we shared a smile. This weekend was going to be an adventure for sure...

Full story on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26598127/chapters/64850665

[happys-crazy-queen22]

Warped Tour Surprise

Gif Credit @bloodrunluv-blog

Requested By Anon I hope you enjoy it

Hope you all enjoy.

Happy Reading Dollies 

@chriscrosscerulli @ryansitkowskiswifey  @ilovetaquitosmmmm

"Warped tour here we come". You cheered as you started loading your bag into the tour bus.

"This year is going to be great". Chris kissed your lips.

"And why is that"?

"Because you're here and we can have tons of sex".

"That's the only reason"?

"No, I'm glad you're here with me. We get to spend time together and go to concerts like normal couples".

"That sounds truly romantic, Chris. I love you".

"I love you too". He kissed you again, picking you up and throwing you over his shoulder smacking your ass on the way to the door.

"Crazy goon, put me down". He threw you on the couch. You landed with a thud and your head landed in Ryan's lap.

"Hi there". You smiled looking up at him. Ryan was not impressed.

"Hi".

"Chris come get your girlfriend out of my lap and put her in yours".

"She's yours. I need a break she's been on my lap all night". Chris laughed as you gasped getting off Ryan.

"You liar. He's been in my lap the whole night".

"I really don't want to hear about your sex life. Please shut up".

"Oh Ryan, you love me".

"The jury is still out on that". Ryan chuckled as he went back to his phone.

"Babe, I'm going to lay down for a bit". You told Chris.

"You okay. Don't tell me you're getting sick we just started warped tour".

"No just tired. I didnt get much sleep last night". You winked at Chris as Ryan groaned.

"I'm still here hearing about your sex life".

"Good night". You kissed his lips and headed off to his bunk.

You must have slept for hours because when you woke up you were already there. The guys were walking around getting to know the band's that were playing.

Getting out of bed your head started to feel dizzy as you stood up. You quickly sat back down. Feeling nauseous and light headed you crawled back into bed and tried going back to sleep. You shrugged it off as the motion of the bus moving.

"Y/N"? Feeling a hand shake you a groan came from you.

"What"?

"You're missing all the fun". It was Chris.

"I'm not in the mood for fun. I don't feel good".

"What's wrong"?

"I think the bus ride made me dizzy and nauseous".

"Yeah that can happen if you haven't been on a long bus ride before. It will get better. You need anything"?

"No I'm good. Going to try and sleep some more".

"Okay. Rest well". Chris kissed your temple and rubbed your leg before leaving.

The night came Chris and the band were back inside they were up front talking and laughing. A very awful taste came into your mouth as you were sleeping. You tried swallowing it down but the more you swallowed the stronger the urge got to throw up.

"Oh fuck". You covered your mouth throwing yourself off the bed and leaped over the piles of bags and clothes in the floor and bolted to the bus bathroom.

Blech blech. The sounds of your lunch hit the toilet. Your eyes were watering and you throat burned.

"What is that"? Ricky asked, quieting everyone down.

"Everyone's here". Balz looked around.

"Y/N". Chris yelled sprinting to the bathroom. He knocked on the door.

"Y/N, you okay"?

"No". You gagged as a piece of food got stuck in your throat.

"I get you a sprite and some crackers". You heard him walk away.

"What's happened"? Ricky questioned.

"She's sick. I think she has motion sickness from the bus". Chris grabbed a can of sprite and a sleeve of crackers heading back to you.

"Hope she feels better".

Chris knocked again then came in. You sat on the floor with a rag on your face.

"Here you go". Chris popped the top on the can and handed it to you.

"Thanks". You cleared your throat. It was hurting and you sounded terrible. You haven't thrown up this much since the last time you got food poisoning at the seafood restaurant that Chris took you for your birthday six months ago.

"I'm sorry". He crouched beside you. Removing the wash cloth you eyed him.

"It's not your fault. I'm just not use to it like you are. I'll be better tomorrow".

"Do you need anything like motion sickness medicine"?

"No. Just leave me the bathroom, keep me in sprite and just love me".

"I can do that". He chuckled.

"Oh and guess what"?

"What"?

"Slipknot is playing one show here. They're the special guest".

"No f-ing way".

"So you need to get better. I want to take you to their concert".

"I'm already better. It's a date". You blew a kiss to him when he closed the door checking on you before he left.

Two days have past and you sickness hasn't stopped. Chris was getting worried but you just shrugged it off until you felt you threw up a lung. Your back hurt and you didn't feel like yourself.

"I'm taking you to the hospital". Chris grabbed your bag and started putting clothes in it.

"I'm not going to the hospital. I'm fine. This will pass".

"You haven't ate a proper meal in three days. You live on sprite and crackers. That's not healthy".

"Chris".

"Please go. For me"? He looked at you with those puppy dog eyes.

"Fine but under one condition".

"What"?

"You can't go". Chris shook his head.

"No, I'm going to be there. What if something is wrong"?

"Then I will call you".

"What if you dont have time? They will take you to surgery and I will never know".

"I'm going alone or not at all".

"Okay you dont want me to go the you're going with Ryan".

"Ryan"?

"Yes".

"Ask him, he's going to say no".

"Ryan will you take Y/N to the hospital"? Chris asked Ryan who was sitting in his bunk playing a game.

"Yeah".

"Ryan you're supposed to say no".

"You really need to go. I will wait out in the waiting room for you".

"Fine. Let's go". You groaned. Getting out of your nice warm bunk.

Ryan and you waited in the waiting room what seemed like forever but it was only twenties minutes. You had thrown up six times in that time. The nurse was afraid you would pass out.

"We are the only ones here what is taking so long"? Ryan bounced his leg.

"We might be the only ones you see but this hospital is probably filled with a lot of people. If you don't want to be here then you can go"?

"No, I told Chris I would take you and I am".

"I just hate hospitals".

"I know. Me too. Just relax and play on your phone".

"It dying". Ryan huffed.

"Here play on mine". You handed him your phone.

"Thanks".

"Miss Y/L/N"? A nurse called you.

"Here". You smiled at Ryan and followed the nurse. Ryan sat there quietly playing on your phone, texting Chris every few minutes with up dates.

"So miss Y/L/N, what brings you in here today"? Your doctor asked as she looked at your chart.

"I'm on tour with my boyfriend and we ride in a tour bus so the day we got to the site I got this feeling of nausea and I was dizzy. I thought it was just motion sickness but this has been going on for three days now, it's gotten worse and it doesn't seem to be letting up any time soon".

"Okay, lets take a look at you and see what we can do". You laid down on the exam table. She lifted up your shirt and started touching your stomach.

"I'm guessing you are sexually active"?

"Yes but we always use condoms".

"Are you on birth control"?

"No, I have really bad side effects in using birth control so I don't take any".

"Okay".

"I'm going to run a few test and see maybe something will show up".

"Fine".

The nurse came and drew blood and she hooked you to a IV you were dehydrated from all the throwing up.

"Everything has came back normal except one".

"Oh god".

"You're pregnant. Congratulations".

"What? How? I mean I know how but woah".

"I'd say you're about six months".

"Six months"?

"Yes".

"Can you get morning sickness after you find out"?

"Some have morning sickness through out the pregnancy and others only get it some on and off". "Why do ask"?

"Six months again I got food poisoning or could I have been pregnant at the time and it was just telling me and I didn't listen"?

"You may have been. Did you go to the doctor"?

"No. It was over in twenty-four hours".

"Then you may have been. It's highly likely".

"This is insane, really". Your mind was blown.

"Do you want to keep it"?

"Yes. Yes. I'm happy its just very unexpected thats all". "I came in here thinking I'm dying and I'm just pregnant".

"How did I not know"?

"The baby was probably playing hide and seek with you coming out at night and hiding during the day. Has you appetite increased"?

"Yeah but I was under stress so I thought stress eating".

"Well you're pregnant and not dying so you're boyfriend is going to get a shock of his life". She said with a chuckle.

"Yeah he is".

After the doctors you went to get something to eat. She had given you motion sickness pills to help you eat. Ryan was asking all sorts of questions on the way there.

"Are you okay"?

"Ryan yes. I'm just hungry". You said taking a bite out of your burger. "Mmmmmm, so good".

"Did she drug you"?

"No".

"Then why all of the sudden can you eat"?

"She gave me motion sickness meds and I'm pregnant".

"What"!!

"I'm pregnant and if you tell Chris before I do you'll never be able to play a guitar again".

"What"?!!! He was stunned. It wasn't even his kid and he was shocked.

"I'm pregnant". You took the last bite of your burger.

"I didn't know you two were trying"?

"We weren't. It just happened. Can you get me another burger"?

"Here you can have mine". Ryan handed you his burger.

"You think its a bad idea that I keep the baby"?

"No, I just can't believe that Chris is the first one to have a kid. I thought it would be Ricky or Vinny".

"Vinny? He's still a kid". You giggled.

"Exactly, they can learn to grow up together".

"Seriously though, I'm happy for you". He gave you a shy smile.

"Thanks Ryan".

"Now let's get you back before Chris has my head".

"Do you know the stage manager for slipknot"?

"Yeah"?

"Can you give them a call? I need to talk to them".

"Okay"? Ryan took out his phone and handed it to you. The drive back to warped tour you were planning something for Chris.

"Y/N". Chris wrapped his long arms around your waist.

"How did it go"?

"I was dehydrated and she just gave me meds for the nausea".

"That's all"?

"Yeah". You looked at Ryan who was hiding his face. He really couldnt keep a secret as big as this from Chris.

"Ryan"?

"Yeah, everything's good. But...". You gulped when Ryan said but.

"She has her appetite back so we may need more food". Thank God he didn't say anything.

"I figured she would. Im glad you're fine". "Are you ready to party tonight"?

"Yeah, I'm waiting for that date".

"They're about to go on. You want to head over there"?

"Yeah". You wrapped your arm around his waist his arm around your shoulder and walked to the Slipknot stage.

"Come on". You pulled Chris to the back with the Slipknot crew.

"We can't be back here". Chris sneaked in as you giggled.

"Y/N"? The manager waved you over.

"Wait, you know him"? Chris was in aww.

"Hey there".

"After the last song you can go on there".

"Thank you so much".

"No problem". He said with a smile.

"You're fucking kidding me? We're going on stage with Slipknot"? Chris was acting like a kid in a candy store.

"Yes".

"How"?

"I have connections". Chris kissed you hard and passionate.

It was the second to last song. You and Chris were rocking out to one of Chris's favorite songs. You're surprised Chris hasn't gotten whiplash but you'd worry about that later. He was is happy.

You could hear Corey tell the audience that the lead singer of Motionless in white is coming on stage with his girlfriend.

"That's your queue". The manager pointed to the front.

"Lets go". You grabbed Chris's sweaty hand and pulled him on stage. His face was frozen. He was nervous being there with a person he looked up to.

"Hi ya doing Chris"? Corey asked.

"Great". Chris mumbled into the mic.

"Wonderful, now this little lady has something to tell you". He handed you the mic.

"Chris, I'm having so much fun with you in this fairy tale and I think it's time we add a new chapter to it".

"I'm pregnant".

Chris starred at you with a blank expression. You understand that it was a shock but this was funny.

"You okay there pal"? Corey asked Chris who nodded and mumbled a few words.

"You sure, do we need a medic"?

"No".

"So, what do you think"?

"We're going to need a bigger tour bus". Chris ran his hand through his hair.

"Yeah but are you happy"?

"Yes. Fuck yes". He hugged you tightly swirling you around on stage.

"Give a round of applause for the new parents". Corey clapped. Chris quickly hugged him and squealed. You didn't know if he was happy about the baby or hugging Corey Taylor.

"I'm so fucking happy". Chris screamed, you giggled hugging him.

"I love you".

"I love you too". Chris kissed you sweetly with his hand on your belly.

Chris was truly happy until you told him that you were six months along then he fainted. He thought he had some time to get  things ready but the baby would be here in no time. The guys still couldnt believe that Chris was the first to knock a girl up and become a dad when you told them.

[written-on-the-trees]

Ricky Horror Fan Fiction - Under The Light Of A Full Moon

Prompt: Full Moon

Word-count: 2200 words

Warnings: none

Description: Unlike seemingly every other Werecreature on the planet, Ricky hates the full moon and everything about it...until he doesn't, thanks to Motionless In White's new merch girl.

In the past, were-creatures had worshipped the moon as a deity.

 With the full moon, their abilities were at the strongest: shifts were easier, all their senses were more sensitive, the whole world felt like it was alight with energy. Magic felt like it was dancing through the air, and to a were-creatures and shifters, there was nothing that made them feel more alive than the night of the full moon.

 Except for Ricky.

 Ricky hated the full moon.

 He despised it, loathed it, detested it, reviled it, abhorred it, felt revolted by it, was unable to stomach it…

 Words never seemed enough to describe how much Ricky hated the full moon, despite how often Chris rolled his eyes and complained that, for someone who felt that way, Ricky certainly used enough of them, but that was the truth. Where other shifters felt at their most alive with all the magic in the air, Ricky just felt itchy. The full moon made him uncomfortable, no matter what skin he wore…and worse than that, he never felt more alone than he did on the night of the full moon.

 The other shifters in the band didn’t get it; they weren’t like Ricky. Chris was a puma, he loped off to be on his own when he shifted, usually to go and sleep high up in the tree branches, abandoning the rest of them on the ground. Ryan, Justin, and Vinny were wolves, and they ran off together to do wolf shit together, their longer legs eating up the ground and leaving Ricky behind. They didn’t mean to, and always circled back to him when they realised - or Chris would drop out of nowhere, scaring the shit out of Ricky before play fighting or just forcing Ricky to curl up and go to sleep with him on a comfortable patch of leaves.

 Both the pack animals and the loner made time for him, even though he never asked them, but Ricky knew that neither Chris or Ryan, Justin, and Vinny could fully enjoy being shifted when he was around, so he’d stopped shifting with them, waiting for them to all go off before changing forms and skulking around on his own.

 It was awful.

 Ricky was a fox, and although foxes weren’t quite pack animals like wolves were, they weren’t loners like pumas, either. He was meant to be around other foxes, but foxes were rare in the shifter community: so much so that Ricky had only ever met one other fox in his entire life. The woman who had adopted him when they found him bawling in an alleyway had been amazing - but she was gone now, and Ricky was alone.

 Now it was the night before the full moon, and everyone had run off to be in their animal forms, and Ricky had volunteered to wait in to meet the replacement for their merch girl. Hyacinth was a nice witch, but she’d recently gotten pregnant, and a tour bus with a dozen different supernatural creatures on was not the best place for her and her unborn child. She’d held out until the record label could send a replacement, but now she was gone, and her replacement was due any minute.

    And as if by magic, there is the knock on the door.

   Getting to his feet, Ricky took a second to wait until his skin felt like it had resettled - fucking full moon - and went to go and greet the new merch girl.

 He opened the door…and froze.

 The knowledge hit him like a wave - he didn’t know if it was her aura, or her scent, or something else entirely, but he looked at the merch and knew instinctively that she was like him. Another fox shifter.

    “You’re a fox!”

   Both of them exclaimed at exactly the time, probably wearing matching expressions of shock and excitement, if the sight of the woman’s face and the feel of his own was any indication, and then both of them started blushing.

 Ricky couldn’t help but note how cute the woman looked with her dark skin flushing with the faintest shade of red - but she went from cute to beautiful when she played off the comment with a smile, her grin absolutely brilliant contrasting with the mahogany of her skin.

   “Well, I’ve certainly had worse compliments,” she teased, flicking her braids back in was playfully flirty.

 “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean - I just - uhm - ” Ricky stuttered, before regaining control of his mouth: “I didn’t mean to, like, come onto you or anything. It’s just been a long time since I met another fox shifter.”

 “It’s okay, I know the feeling, other than my family, I don’t think I’ve met another one of us since…like…middle school.” came the reassuring response: “I’m Desirae, but you can call me Des.”

 Ricky stuck his hand out and smiled in a way he hoped didn’t make him look like an idiot: “Ricky.”

 Des took his hand with a grin of her own: “I should probably tell you in advance that I know all you guys by name; I’m a bit of a fan. Not a crazy one, but you might catch me singing one of your guys’ songs in the shower. Thought it might be better to tell you in advance.”

 “Thanks for the heads up,” Ricky laughed, before helping her left her bags onto the bus: “Here, let me give you the tour while the bus is empty and there’s no-one to get underfoot.”

   Ricky gave Des the tour, explained the trick to getting the hot water to work in the shower, and pointed out the shelf that hers in the kitchen cabinet: warning her to mark her name on things, or the wolves would get into it. Des seemed experienced in tour bus living, and adjusted quickly to the space, greeting all the others with a friendly smile when they made their way onto the bus bit by bit.

 He didn’t comment, but Ricky could tell Chris was pleased - probably because he was one of the few people Ricky had confided in that he missed being around other foxes on the full moon.

 Ricky’s suspicion were proved right when Chris ‘casually’ asked Des about her plans for the full moon tomorrow - which was a perfectly normal question for shifters to ask fellow shifters, but Ricky saw right through, just like he saw through Chris’s neutral façade when Des gave him a non-committal answer.

 It was a disappointment Ricky shared.

 Saying that he hadn’t wanted to spend the full moon with Des would be a lie, but that didn’t mean he didn’t understand. They were still strangers, and it was a pretty common attitude among shifters that time spent in your other skin was meant to be spent with friends and family and loved ones. Ricky hadn’t known Des for more than a few hours - would’ve only known her for a day by the time the moon rose tomorrow, so he got why she wouldn’t want to shift with him, even if it meant another full moon spent with his skin itching all over, the ground not quite feeling right under his paws, and feeling the all too familiar crippling loneliness as he looked up at the sky.

 Was it a fun prospect? No. But it was something that he was used to, and Ricky was a grown-ass man: he’d suck it up and deal with it. Maybe next month he could approach Des, but until then he’d just grin and bear it.

 He really wasn’t expecting Des to approach him…but that was exactly what she did, knocking on the outside of his bunk just seconds after Chris had leapt out of a skylight - the fucking show-off - and left the bus empty aside from her and Ricky.

   She looked awkward when Ricky opened the curtain, but that didn’t stop her from being clear when she asked: “I wondered if you wanted to come and run with me?”

 Ricky’s brain heard the words…but didn’t quite manage to understand them: “You want to shift together?”

 “Only if you want to!” Des exclaimed quickly: “I won’t be offended if you’d rather catch up with one of the guys, or spend the night on your own, I just…well, I’m guessing you haven’t had the chance to run with another fox for a while, and I haven’t either and I know I missed it, so I just thought I’d offer.”

 Finally, Ricky’s brain kicked into gear and scolded him for being an idiot: “Yes!”

 “Yes?” Des asked, her expression relaxing and turning into something playful that made Ricky blush.

 “Uh, yes.” he repeated, managing to sound a bit less like a teenage boy asked if he’d like to lose his virginity this time: “Yes, I’d really appreciate that. You’re right; I haven’t had the chance to shift with another fox for a long time.”

   Des grinned, and led Ricky off of the bus.

 They stood in the parking lot, and for once Ricky could feel the light of the full moon on his skin without wanting to scratch it off.

 Des waited no time in shifting: disappearing in a haze of pale golden light, and reappearing as a lean, pale sandy coloured fox with short legs and big ears - a dessert fox. She yipped at him, and Ricky shifted himself, the world turning blue-grey for a second, before he opened his eyes again and found Des in a play bow: still shorter than him, but a lot less so now that he was on four legs too.

 He barked once, and Des took off, letting Ricky chase her.

 She was fast, for a fox with shorter legs than his own, and made up for his longer strides by being able to make sharp turns at the last minute, which sent him tumbling into things more than once. It was fucking fantastic, and Ricky was almost disappointed when he managed to nip her tail, tagging her as it, and marking it as his time to run and her turn to chase - but Des came out of nowhere not even minutes later, nipping his back leg, and making him it again.

 They went back and forth for hours, past the wolves tiredly meandering back onto the bus, and past Chris wondering over to watch them disinterestedly from the top of the bus for a few minutes, until the moon started to sink from the sky - but they still didn’t shift back. Instead they yowled at the door of the bus, until they heard Ryan swearing and grumbling on his way to open it, at which point they rushed past his ankles and slunk into the back room to curl up together on one of the many large cushions that were spread across the floor.

 It felt so good to give into the animal side for a few hours; foxes were affectionate by nature, and as nice as it was to cuddle with Chris every now and then (not that Ricky would ever stroke the feline’s already huge ego by admitting it) it was even better with a fellow fox. More relaxing, more grounding…more settling. It was all too easy to fall asleep in fox form, Des’s head tucked under his chin, and her shoulder pressed firmly against his.

   Best night sleep I’ve had in years.

   Ricky admitted as much when they woke up and shifted back, and Des agreed with another brilliant smile.

   “We’ll do it again next month?”

 “Why wait that long?” Des grinned.

 Ricky beamed right back: “Good point.”

   They were about to go and scrounge up breakfast from the cupboards, since the bus had long since started moving on to the next venue, and then look up the next area they were going to be in to see if there was anywhere good to run in nearby, when the door to the back room was slammed open and they were greeted with a glaring Chris.

 He looked every inch the pissy cat he was…but that didn’t mean Ricky didn’t take a step back when Chris lifted a hand to point at them ominously, and saw that Des did the exact same thing, at the exact same time. Ricky understood why.

 You didn’t piss off cats, no matter who you or what you were.

 They got mean, and they got mean fast.

   “If you two start anymore of that horrifying scream-y yowling shit again,” Chris threatened them, knowing full well what Des and Ricky were thinking: “I will stalk you. I will find you. And I will yowl right back until your ears bleed.”

 Ricky looked at Des: “He probably would. He’s done it before to the wolves when their howling got on his nerves.”

 Des just looked mischievous: “All I’m hearing is all of us should yowl at the wolves just because we can.”

 “Smart, Des,” Chris smirked: “Appealing to the one thing I like more than stopping things that irritate me.”

 “Irritating other people?” Des asked.

 “Exactly.”

   And just like that, it was a plan.

 Ricky couldn't wait.

[chasseurdeloup-retired]

Ten CCs of Sass || Ricky and Kaden

TIMING: A few days after Ricky took on an asanbosam and after Kaden’s mime stabbing PARTIES: @ricky-corderbro and @chasseurdeloup SUMMARY:  Best roommates ever.

Kaden was starting to lose track of time in this stupid place. It was hard to know when was what when there were no windows in the room and time seemed to move at a snail’s pace. But he was pretty sure he remembered the layout of the room. And this was not it. Everything was similar but slightly off somehow. “Regan?” he asked, knowing full well he didn’t see her or Blanche or anyone else babysitting him at the moment. Maybe he hoped they would pop up around a corner or something. Still, no answer. But there was a fucking curtain halfway open and another patient on the other side. Putain de merde, just when he thought this fucking hell pit couldn’t get any worse. They must have moved his fucking bed in the night and now he had a goddamn roommate. And better yet, his IVs were taped down so thoroughly to his arm, he was pretty sure getting them off was going to take a solid ten minutes and take off hair and maybe even a little skin. He was thoroughly stuck. Fuck.

All in all it had not been Ricky’s favorite week. While thankfully they’d put him under for the harrowing process of putting his ribs back together and removing a portion of one of them from his lung, the pain afterwards had been almost enough to make him wish the asanbosam had finished him off. Sleep had been an elusive target, and it was only after a nurse had come in and given him something to knock him out that he’d managed a couple of hours. Waking up though, had brought a resurgence of pain everytime his heart beat and he took a breath, and it wasn’t until he heard a voice asking for someone named Regan that he realized how fucked his day was truly about to get. He recognized that voice, even if the last time he’d heard it they’d been on a rickety boat arguing about saving lives. He also knew that that voice was attached to someone he’d promised to try to kill, even if he was in no position to actually take action on the threat, “Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me.” he rasped out, voice still not up to par, “Did I actually die? I must have. This has to be fucking hell if I’m stuck here with you”

Kaden’s brows knit together. Something about that voice sounded vaguely familiar. He turned to get a better look at his new roommate. “Putain.” He groaned. It was the fucking do gooder lifegarud boy who was probably some kind of monster. Or knew a few. Of fucking course they ended up in the same room at the same time. What a cherry on top of being stabbed by a mime a few times the other day. “You’re right about one thing, this is fucking hell.” Kaden wanted to throw something but there was nothing but the pillow in reach to toss and, uh, he didn’t want to have to call a nurse to come pick it up off the floor. “The hell happened to you, anyway? Have a run in with a perfectly innocent supernatural monster? Or did your dudley do-right routine finally screw you over?”

Through the haze of pain and pain meds Ricky could feel Kaden’s voice grating on his every nerve, “Jesus fucking christ. Of course it’s fucking you” He attempted to push himself slightly more upright and was rewarding with a white hot pain shooting through his chest, “God. Do you ever tire of the sound of your own fucking voice? I will reach into my chest, pull out one of the many fragments of ribs floating around in there, and stab you in the fucking eye with it if it’s going to net me a reprieve from your sanctimonious bullshit.” He resigned himself to staying laying down and sighed, “You know, fuckhead mcfuckstick, there are those of us capable of distinguishing between an animalistic monster that lacks sentience, and a perfectly harmless member of the supernatural community. I’m sorry you somehow failed Humanity 101”

This little shit really thought he talked too much? Kaden scoffed. “You should ask yourself that. I’m not the one ranting over there.” He started picking at the tape on his arm as the kid ranted the same bullshit grumbling he’d heard a million times before. More colorful than most, he’d give him that, but more of the same. “Fuckhead mcfuckstick, that’s a new one.” He shrugged and continued to try and peel the tape away so he could try and leave before things got any worse. “So how’d that distinguishing go for you? Broken ribs, you said? Sounds like you had a really wonderful encounter.”

“It seemed fitting, given that you are both a fuckhead, and a fuckstick, and I’m Irish so we add Mc to everything.” Ricky rolled his eyes and managed to find the controller for his bed, raising himself so he was sitting upright, “Well it went great. Since I very clearly distinguished that an asanbosam is not a contributing member of society and is instead an animalistic hunter. But these were things I knew before. But you know something about being an animalistic hunter don’t you?” His breath came short for a few moments and he stopped talking, breathing as deeply as he could and balling his fists to try to work through the pain, “We were ambushed. Broken ribs, punctured lung. But I lived so, that’s something. They’re not great ones to run into.”

Irish. Noted. Kaden was sure he’d have plenty of time to figure out what kind of monster he was sharing a room with. Unfortunately. “Asanbosam? Too bad no one was around to stake it. If only there had been an animalistic hunter nearby. Guess they were all at home.” Or stuck in a fucking hospital. “That or no one thought you were particularly worth saving. Shame, you clearly handled it so well on your own.” Still, sounded like the kid had it worse over there than he did. “You got lucky. Even with all that.” Not that he was glad he was okay. That wasn’t his concern at all. “Ran into one of those the other week, seem to be out in force with all the eternal darkness shit going on. Almost stole someone up into the trees.”

“I managed just fine. No deaths, so, that’s a win. It’s currently somewhere in the forest trying desperately to get the rosary I knotted around it’s ankle free. They’re particularly averse to religious iconography.” While most children had a childhood full of nursery rhymes, a solid portion of Ricky’s home education had been the various varieties of vampire that would inevitably try to attack him; he knew a fair few of them by heart. “Ah yes, there’s that good old Hunter “judge, jury, and executioner” mentality that we all know and love so much. Good to know whatever didn’t do a good enough job of killing you left you up on your high horse.” Ricky reached for his phone on the bedside table, scrolling through several texts in all capital letters before deciding that was a problem for later in the afternoon, “I always hated the idea of those fuckers.” He muttered, trying to find a more comfortable position that didn’t put pressure on, well, anything. “Iron teeth. Prehensile tail. They’re straight out of some dnd dungeon master’s nightmare. What the hell is a west African vampire doing in Maine, though?”

“Oh are they? Wow, gee, I never fucking knew that. Slayed my first vampire at age ten but wow, thanks for that riveting new information. Where would I be without you?” Kaden rolled his eyes. He just told the guy he’d encountered an asanbosam the other week, so he would’ve thought he wouldn’t go and explain the obvious to him but guess he was wrong. “Yeah well, sorry to disappoint you by my survival. But if you tell me where that fucking thing was I can probalby deal with once I’m out of here. Or get someone else to. You know, if you can lower yourself off that pedastool to cooperate with an animalistic hunter for two fucking minutes.” This was going to be a long goddamn day. God help him if was two. He wasn’t sure he could survive that. The tape on his arm must have been something akin to duct tape because it wasn’t budging. At this point he wasn’t sure he cared if Regan insisted he stayed the full two plus days. No way would he last that long. “They’re a pain in the ass. Species origin doesn’t really seem to be a barrier to entry in White Crest. I mean, for fuck sakes, the sky’s been dark for a few solid weeks now and you’re questioning how an African vampire got here? This place is fucking weird.”

Kaden’s abrasive voice was honestly on par with the subtle grinding and shifting of his ribs that he could still feel every time he breathed, “God. It just so fucking shocking to me that you’re top of seemingly everybody’s ‘kill him becore he kills us’ list. People skills like yours you should be in public relations. As to the where would you be? Fish food. We’ve gone over this. You’d be fish food.” Ricky let talk of killing a roommate fall silent as a nurse came in to administer meds and bring up his breakfast tray… which was seemingly full of things he didn’t want or couldn’t really eat. One insipid slice of ham seemed to be about the only thing he trusted, and he quickly ate it, keeping his face turned away from Kaden so there were no erstwhile glimpses of fangs, before pushing the tray and the rolling table away, “I don’t want the rest of that, if you’re feeling extra peckish.” He could feel the gentle wave of pain meds crashing on the beach of his mind and pulled his phone towards him, tapping out replies to texts as he listened to Kaden prattle on in the singularly sanctimonious way that he seemed to have cornered the fucking market on, “Yeah as long as there’s a fucking tree vamp wandering the forests near my home attacking members of my community I’m going to fucking question it. But in answer to the question that was sandwiched between the insults… it was the forests to the north of the Docks, bout half a mile before the bridge to Harris Island. It felled a tree right in front of my truck, blocked the road.”

“Yeah, yeah. And I thanked you already, alright.” Kaden bristled at the reminder that he was somewhat in debt to the other man for saving his life. Fucking hated that. Normally he made it easy enough for him to push that aside but then it would rear its ugly head. Still, he noted where that vampire was last seen; he’d be sure to kill it once he was out of there. Not long after, a second nurse came in to give Kaden his tray full of what he assumed was awful lumps of sadness pretending to be food. He wasn’t wrong. The food looked awful, alright, but that wasn’t what his eyes were focused on. No, his eyes went straight to the black and white striped shirt folded neatly with a beret on top and the red blood stains seeped into it. His eyes grew wide with confusion and his pulse picked up as he looked at the nurse. She gave absolutely no indication that anything was out of the ordinary and simply smiled and asked if there was anything else he needed. Kaden was stunned for a moment but it didn’t take long for him to flip the try, tossing it away from him the way someone might flick away a bug that had crawled onto them. He tried to quell the panic that was rising up in him. The nurse just looked confused, not like she was going to kill him on the spot. Which was good, but honestly he still wished he had a weapon in hand. Then she shook her head and looked around like she was unsure of what room she was in or what hat just happened. “Did I do that?” she asked, looking at the try and bending down to pick it up. “I’m sorry, I’ll bring you another tray. Is that your shirt?” Kaden shook his head. “Uh, no. Not-- No, that’s not my shirt. And you didn’t-- Sorry, I lost control of the…” He wanted to run more than ever, his hand reaching for the metal stand where the bags of fluids were hanging. It’d be a decent blunt weapon in a pinch. “Oh, that’s alright. I’ll be right back,” the nurse said, all the fallen food and tray in hand and left with a smile, like nothing ever happened. “Putain de merde, what the actual fuck?”

“It’s really hard to take the thanks seriously when it’s always tied to some sort of insane purge-and-purify human-centric rhetoric. Really sort of dulls the shine on that particular compliment.” He’d been focused on his phone and not on the speciesist fuck in the bed next to him when there was suddenly a ruckus that made him snap his head over to look at that side of the room. “What the absolute fuck you lunatic?” Ricky was so taken aback by the scene that he attempted to push himself out of bed to help clean it up, before bolts of white hot pain reminded him why he didn’t do that, “oh fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck oh fuck.” The nurse’s response to the whole ordeal was what really made him narrow his eyes, “What…. What the fuck is happening over there.” A tiny spot of red appeared on the bandage around his chest and started to grow fractionally, “Well that’s not good. But… that wasn’t normal. What the fuck landed you in here? I mean I had just assumed it was something along the lines of “finally got what was coming to him” but that was fucking weird.”

“Nothing, nothing, it’s--” he started. Kaden’s eyes darted back and forth between where the tray had just fallen and the door. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to slow his breath, bring his pulse back to normal. He let out a deep sigh, trying to rationalize that nothing else was coming in, no one else was there, it was probably safe. But Regan wasn’t back yet. What if something happened to her? Fuck. “Uh, shit. Don’t fucking laugh,” he told his current rommate as he rubbed his palms against the sheets, trying to dry the sweat off them. “I’m here cause I got stabbed by a fucking mime.” He thought about hitting the call button, get another nurse in here. But what if that didn’t help? What if that’s what brought another possessed person to send him more warnings and threats? Shit. He was more or less defenseless if someone came back for him. This is why he fucking hated hosptials (among all the other reasons). “So yeah, that striped shirt, it, uh-- Fuck.” He felt like such a paranoid idiot.

Ricky didn’t really think of himself as a cruel man. He tried to do right by his friends and his neighbors, be a good upstanding member of the community, and generally behave in a way that would make his mother proud of him; since she was his metric for what a good person should be. But the minute Kaden a) told him not to laugh and b) mentioned he’d gotten stabbed by a fucking mime, Ricky knew he was in a losing battle where all of his attempts to be good were going to falter in the face of a chance to ridicule his enemy. The laugh bubbled up inside of him and the piercing pain in his chest battled for dominance but he couldn’t help but throw his head back in laughter, shaking slightly in his bed, “Oh god…. Oh my fucking god…. I”m sorry I’m sorry… did you… did you… the great fucking hunter… bane of the supernatural… did you fucking get put in the hospital by a goddamn mime?!” His laugh turned into a painful cough and he bit down abruptly, a fang piercing his lip “ow fuck.” The laughter died down and he shook his head, “Ahh it feels good and at the same time fucking terrible to laugh. How… how did you manage to get stabbed by a fucking mime?! Was it even a real knife or was this just some A+ really top of the line pantomime that this fucker did?”

Well that was one way to quell the panic. Kaden could feel the anger rising up as the other man laughed. No, fucking cackled. “Shut it!” He looked down at the edge of the bed where his tray fell. Maybe there was still a shitty clementine or something he could chuck at Ricky’s fucking head. No luck. There was still a beret, though. It’d have to do. He scooped it up, scrunched it into a ball, and threw it across the room. He practically huffed as he stewed over on his bed, but a quick glance over to his roommate practically splitting his stitches and he saw it. It was subtle enough, but there was no denying those were fucking big ass fangs sticking out while he cackled. Well that answered that question he was pretty sure he already had the answer to: Monster. What kind, he’d figure out later. Couldn’t be undead if he had a heartbeat to monitor, he knew that much. And couldn’t be a wolf since he didn’t send all of Kaden’s hairs on edge. “Putain, yes it was a real fucking knife, connard! He was fucking possessed or cursed or some shit! Broke into the restaurant and just b-lined to stab me and wouldn’t fucking stop until he died.” It was goddamn karmic watching Ricky in pain over his laughter. Deserved at least that much.

“Oh no, Fuckstick McMimeChow, you have to deal with this fucking laughter because it is infinitely hilarious that a hunter got hospitalized by a motherfucking mime.” Ricky allowed the beret to hit him in the face if only because Kaden deserved at least that tiny victory, and as he held hit in his hands he took as subtle a smell of it as he could, but picked up nothing more than dollar store shampoo and dried blood, “Well… while you can make the argument that choosing ‘mime’ as your profession is in and of itself a curse… he was definitely human.” He threw the beret to the foot of Kaden’s bed, “but I’d wash your hands. There’s blood on that.” Pressing a slightly trembling hand to his chest; the pain was now greater than the mirth he’d received at Kaden’s attack, “That’s gotta be like… top three for shitty dinners. I mean I’ve had some bad fucking meals in my day and while I’ve had both a beer and a dinner roll thrown at me on separate occasions nobody’s actually stabbed me before. Did you kill this maniacal mime or did he just… I don’t know… suddenly expire after coming into contact with undiluted Blood of Douchebag.”

If Kaden had something else to throw, he would have. Instead all he could do was glower at the laughter. “Congrats, Detective pain in the ass, I figured that much out. Of course he was human. Problem was you didn’t see him. The look in his eye. It was like the lights were out but he was going through the motions anway. Really fucking determinedly, too.” At Ricky's evaluation of the beret, he looked down at his hands and decided to just wipe them off on the side of the bed again, in case there was any blood. “We barely got to wine let alone dinner. So yeah, I’d say so.” He sighed, thinking about the poor chardonnay that was the only thing that was murdered that night. What a waste. His head snapped to face his current roommate at his last comment. “Hey, I did not kill him! I mean I didn’t take it lying down, but I’m not a murderer, alright!”

“I’m really feeling like you’re not putting the same energy into this rivalry I am, Kaden. I come up with Fuckstick McMimeChow and you counter with Detective Pain in the ass? I’m a little hurt.” Ricky shot as withering a look as he could manage across the room, “Are you sure that was a curse/possession and not just… you know… people’s kneejerk reaction to being in your presence? I know I always get the urge to stab you repeatedly.” Watching Kaden wipe his hands on the bed he listened before chuffing a sigh of a laugh, “Wait wait wait… did you get stabbed by a mime on a fucking date? Jesus fucking Christ talk about just compounded shit luck. That’s just… woof. I don’t even have anything cutting or scathing for that… that’s just… that’s just rough.” Any pity he might have felt for the other man quickly evaporated however, “Oh yes. This old chestnut. I spend my life hunting things down but am somehow not a murderer. What is this… verse 78 now?”

“Sorry, what can I say. I don’t spend as much time thinking about you as you think about me.” Kaden rolled his eyes at the remark. “He came into the restaurant seemingly just to stab me. I know I’ve pisseed people off but that just doesn’t track, alright. I never saw the guy before. And yeah I was on a fucking date, alright. Shocking as it may be. Still not sure if it’s one of the worst dates I’ve been on.” He sighed at the remark. Of course, couldn’t get through one conversation without the bleeding heart bullshit. “Look you don’t have to fucking agree with me but don’t act like you don’t know where I stand. Murder is when you kill people and monsters aren’t people. Been over this.” There was a long stretch of silence and it seemed like they might be done snipping for the moment. Fine by him, but the whole place was too quiet. And he couldn’t bear to sit and watch this shitty infomercial. He waited a moment, maybe he could just sleep or something. But he wasn’t tired. “Hey, uh, I think you have the remote. Can you change the thing. The Price is Right is about to come on.”

“Jesus. And I thought my fucking love life was grim. You make me look like a fucking Casanova if that wasn’t one of your worst dates. Am I surprised? No. But still… blech. Poor woman. I’m just assuming you’re straight because I’m fervently praying you’re not gay. We don’t want you on our team. Please stay far the fuck away.” It was still a little surprising how robotic and immediate the return to the hunter party line was. There was almost a moment, for just the briefest of seconds, where Ricky had thought that they were actually on the road to… well whatever was one step above immediately homicidal. But all of that was swept away in an instant as they returned to ground zero. A zone which did not net Kaden any tv privileges. “Sorry.” He picked up the remote and plucked its batteries out, tossing the powerless shell to the other man, “Sharing is what people do.” He smiled a wide bright smile, every perfectly maintained fang shining in the horrible hospital lighting, “and I guess I just don’t qualify. Besides…. Price is Right with no Bob Barker? One of us is the monster here and it isn’t me.” This was going to be the longest hospital stay ever.

[jq37]

thoughts on this week's ep?

**spoilers for broadway brawl**

***Before we start, I remembered as I was typing this one of the important notes I lost from last week’s recap: Interesting that Christmas seemingly went off without a hitch. I expected Santa to come back into play somehow (like, someone would check on him to make sure Christmas was still on or he’d call them in to help or something) but he hasn’t, at least not yet.***

My guys, my guys, my guys. Was that something or was that something?

I think I am on record as saying that combat is my least favorite part of ttrpgs generally speaking because I’m here for the RP but when a combat episode shines it really freaking shines (see eg: that first combat ep of Bloodkeep where everyone went full Galaxy Brain except for Matt who couldn’t hit a single thing) and this is such a good example. This is easily a top five ep of the season for me, maybe top three so let’s get into it and break down why it was so awesome.

We start right where we left off with Titania and members of her court having come into the theater to beat the tar out of Misty mid-show.

Quick note: At the end of last ep, it was set up so that Misty was thrust on stage right after hearing the mirror was on stage which would place this fight right at the top of Act 2 but at the start of this ep, Brennan seems to indicate that it’s taking place during what would be the closing number. Which would make more sense but imagine you go see a play, the first act is super dope, and then the second act is an insane, minute long fight that’s pretty unconnected to the plot and then a buff, naked, beautiful man tells you the show is over and you should leave. Wild. Anyway.

Pixies with tommy guns in inherently funny.

So one of the things that makes this fight really great is the way it directly ties into the story in a way besides “These bad guys are in our way.” Misty is using this show as a part of her reincarnation spell so if the show is messed up, it fails and she’s on her last life. Brennan has a cool mechanic of making her roll death saves every round at a difficulty lower than her modifier (which is s/t crazy like 11) but that gets harder with damage done to her and performance checks failed by other players who decide to jump on stage. It’s a great way to make the battle feel like it has more personal stakes and it’s my fave original Brennan mechanic since the Family in Flames Sophie’s Choice situation.

(I love that the death save counter is changed for theater comedy/tragedy masks for this. Nice touch.)

Em, Esther, and Wally are also at the fight which is clutch.

Also, Sondheim is specifically here which is an insane detail to add just because.

WILD that no one knows what’s going on with the ritual initially because, as Lou almost does, getting all the civilians out is the smart move and it would COMPLETELY ruin Misty’s plans instantly.

Lou having Kingston take the stairs bc’s he’s 50+ years old and has no time for that nonsense has equal but opposite energy to him doing extra rolls for Fabian to do unnecessary parkour before a simple attack because Fabian’s Like That.

Murph fireblasts the hell out of Titania’s foot soldiers right off the bat from outside of counterspell range which is very cool.

“Give me a performance check for the cockroach.”

“You’re upstaging me bitch?”

Another great thing about this fight is that because of it’s theatrical nature, everyone’s RPing it more than a usual battle ep (or more intensely maybe is what I mean).

Titania hypnotizes Don Confetti and his goons into fighting for her.

“She doesn’t know she’s in a play but she does sing most of her dialogue which is helpful for you.” Titania is just Like That.

Pete drops an erupting earth and drops a sick 37 damage on those same minions Kug got.

I didn’t notice before but yeah, Ally does roll die like a f-ing beyblade champion.

Emily hearing Murph’s low key, offhand comments and cracking up is great.

“Get Sondheim!” (Emily and then Ally: WHAT?!)

Actual living dude Stephen Sondheim being involved in this fight is just so ridiculous and fun and crazy.

We go around to Misty’s turn and she has to beat a 28 (upped from 10) and she fails which feels worse than a normal failed death save somehow.

Lou, in a very good RP move, tells Pete to tell Misty to end the show so she can tell them not to so the group has a valid reason to not evacuate which is a thing they (or at least him and Ricky) would obviously want to do.

Sophie, the madwoman, jumps out of the balcony, grabs a costume, then runs on stage. Emily’s glee at being told that her grabbing the costume will give her advantage is great. She’s always trying to figure out how to make the most of her moves. She is the living embodiment of the concept of method to madness (which is from Hamlet since we’re talking Shakespeare today). 

Ox is constantly dying (Brennan!) but also it’s like, why was he even there before the fight started? I’ve never seen a non-service dog in a theater.

Ricky: Is this part of it?

Oh, forgot to mention that everything that happens on stage is kinda shielded by the Umbral Arcana so everyone watching thinks it’s part of the show, which is a cool plot detail.

Ricky gets fULLY NAKED (Emily, with perfect comic timing: Now do I roll with disadvantage?) and leaps into the fray. He casts Protection from Evil and Good on her which (1) He does by Magic Mike body-rolling on her while he’s naked and considering how much shorter she is that her raises some interesting questions about positioning and (2) is the most clutch use of this spell I’ve seen in a while. It’s a spell I always wanna take as a Paladin because it makes sense character-wise, but I’ve never been able to actually use it because we’re never fighting fiends, fae, or celestial.

Brennan’s dime change change reversal of the critic’s comments on Ricky’s body rolls when Zac re-rolls his 11 makes me glad I never had to face him in a debate team setting.

Ally: What’s Esther’s deal ;)/Brennan: *Esther’s Weapon Stats*

“Your only secret you’ve ever had in your life is that you have a crush on her.”

Wally has a beautiful singing voice and a working knowledge of Midsummer's which is wild.

Lou’s periodic, “My man”’s when Ally/Pete does something cool. He’s very dialed into being Kingston.

Ricky’s aura keeps everyone near him from being charmed and Misty saves everyone else w/ a nat 20 counterspell. Few things in D&D are more satisfying than a well executed counterspell.

Titania trying to get Pete to be her consort or something when he just over the super posh Priya is very funny.

“I mean between me and Sondheim, get Sondheim!”

“DO WE HAVE HOMEWORK TONIGHT?” (“We did have homework.”)

Anyway, Misty has one success now!

Misty tries to use puppet to get Titania to drop her crown and it doesn’t work. Brennan says the crown is Crown of Stars which I looked up and it’s actually a spell, not a physical crown, but I’m assuming he used the mechanical effects of the spell on a physical item.

Brennan doing all these musical/singing bits when he absolutely doesn’t have to. I love it.

I love Ricky and Sophie being the two martial fighting heavy hitters of the group. Like, the two fighters, having the spellcasters’ backs.

I hope the one kung fu fan in the back of the theater never sees another Broadway show again because he’s gonna be so disappointed. 

“I’m just so inspired by that beautiful penis.”

Murph, out of character, verbally acknowledging how insane what they’re doing is. I love when someone pauses in a game of D&D to just recite what’s currently happening out of context so everyone can appreciate how crazy it is. D&D. Gotta love it..

Emily and Siobhan have a quick conversation in the background about whether Sondheim did Les Mis or not (not, that’s Claude-Michel Schönberg) while Brennan and Murph are Ring nonsense.

I also was mildly suspicious of Alyssa so I’m glad Kingston checked her out.

The entire roast of Brennan when he’s selecting D6s is an instantly iconic D20 moment. I can’t do it justice. You kinda just have to see it.

“Someone call Wizards of the Coast!”

Em, Wally, and Alyssa go out when Titania puts out a huge spell that blinds Kug.

“Yummy, yummy, tastes like ass.”

On Misty’s next turn, she rolls a fail which makes it 2 failures to 1 success. Brennan mentions that a nat 1 counts as 2 failures and a nat 20 counts as 2 successes. I’m sure that won’t be relevant later because you can’t foreshadow things when dice rolls are completely random.

Misty fails on puppet again again and Titania goes full Wicked Witch of the West on her and starts Jonesing for those shoessss.

Emily’s Emily(tm) move of the session is doing a flying leap at Titania, hitting her with a stunning strike and having Brennan retract the Box off Doom he was pulling out because she can’t save when she’s stunned. She just plummets out of the sky.

Don Confetti respecting the sacrament of marriage as he goes full Opera ghost and tries to garrote Sophie.

Ricky (still naked) grabs the crown from Titania, tosses it to Misty, and, with some improv and a good charisma roll, makes the show suddenly make sense to the very confused but entertained audience.

I’m so glad that Murph decided to turn into a bear and that they made the Winter’s tale ref. I should have had faith in Brennan and Siobhan, the theater nerds. Exit pursued by a bear y’all.

Lou and Emily bonding over being proud of their die for rolling well when they lend it out for a big roll.

Really wish Pete had wild magic surged in this fight. Just to add that extra bit of chaos. 

With a very good turn (no damage taken, no performances failed) Misty only has to avoid snake eyes to get through this turn. She leapfrogs over that low bar and rolls a nat 20, instantly fulfilling her win condition. At this point, the play is superfluous and Titania is still down.

“Brennan lost and now he knows reddit is gonna eat his ass.”

OK, remember how I said earlier that Misty seems like the kind of character you nudge a little temptation at just to spice things up? Yeah, her killing Titania and getting the crown of the Seelie Fae makes me a liiiitle apprehensive, but we’ll see how that turns out.

“I killed my queen! This is America we don’t have royalty here.”

“Bear, I don’t know who you are, but take me on your back, let me ride on stage.” —creator of West Side Story, Stephen Sondheim

Misty charms the critic at the show to make sure they get a good review which is such a fae thing to do.

Kingston’s clearly not loving attacking Don and Co. post “real fight” what with his whole Do No Harm thing (well, that’s Dr’s but same principle applies I assume) is a good character detail. For that matter, so is Ricky just taking Titania’s crown and not beheading her which he super could have done while she was down but it would have been very incongruous with everything else about him.

Brian “This isn’t Loony Tunes” Murphy throws Sondheim as a projectile weapon at a pixie who snaps the pixie’s neck and then does a monologue at the audience.

I love it when someone rolls low on an insight check and Brennan gives them useless info and then they repeat it in their character’s voice.

4 mins from the end of the ep, Siobhan realizes there are two Perrys in this story for the first time and has a bigger reaction to that than almost everything else in this ep except her nat 20.

Ricky looks for costume faun legs to cover his fully out dick instead of costume pants or even his own pants.

Misty starts glowing with reincarnation energy and she runs into her dressing room for privacy. Also, she still super hasn’t told anyone what’s going on. (ALSO, assuming she’s gonna make the world think she died, it’s gonna be wild for the company of the show to have their leading lady put on the performance of her life and then die on opening night).

“Who am I to refuse a crown when it’s placed so deftly upon my head?”

You know that behind the scenes thing where Brennan is like, “Yeah, I knew Siobhan was gonna steal that book,”? I got some of those vibes during the crown scene.

The implications of what Misty did are gonna be left until next ep but Brennan says something about her creating her own court and it looks like she’s recruiting followers in the promo. IDK how I feel about that (these stories tend to have great power--especially tied to powerful magical items--as a corrupting force) but I am very excited to see how it goes down! See you then!

[eclecticminded]

Stripping Bare

@madpanda75 asked: Ok! I finally picked an idea for the giveaway story request! What if you’re working undercover as a stripper during a stakeout and Barba (who you’ve always had a thing for) sees the footage which leads to the two of you hooking up 😉 Maybe the reader shows Barba some of her moves??

Girl yes! This was fun to write, and makes me want to invest in a pole for my fat ass. Here we go! Hope you like!

Words: 1940

You go undercover as a stripper, Rafael likes what he sees.

Warnings: Sex. Brief mention of torture and murder. Creep guys.

Tags: @southsiderepresent @glimmerglittergirl @madpanda75  @southern-magnolia @katmstanton @esparza-army @sweetsummertime99  @obfuscateyummy @lifeisbetterwithbarba  @lyssa1385  @hux-me-up   @bowieisawizard @sleepylunarwolf @mrsrafaelbarba anyone else ask! Also I have a Kofi (link in blog description) if anyone wants to donate!

When you took the pole dancing for fitness class while in college, you never expected to love it so much. Never expected to have one installed in your apartment. And you sure as hell never expected to be going under cover as one. But you had the skill set and could kick ass, so here you were. Ricky Rogers, Double R as he was known on the street, owned a less than reputable strip joint. He was selling his girls to be a part of torture snuff films, and one of them barely made it. Barely.

 Elise was no longer able to speak but she wrote pages upon pages of what happened to her, and what dirty dealing Double R was up to. Only problem, you needed cold hard facts, not just her words. Fin was trying to use his old vice connections to get a girl to go under for the squad, but no one wanted to work Double R’s joint. That’s where you came in.

 It started off as a joke, you mentioned you took a pole dancing class and befor you knew it you were out buying pasties and fishnets. Fin went undercover with you as a patron, you had a camera in the necklace you wore, but he was there for back up and additional surveillance. He was essentially your handler. Every night you worked, Fin got a private lap dance and you updated each other on the situation.

 Rumor had it that Double R was posting about having a new perky toy for sale, and wouldn’t you know it, the ad fit your description.  After that night you noticed Nick, Mike, and Sonny occasionally in the crowd. All four men had camera glasses, and Liv was watching nearby with Amanda. Hell even Rafael was there, making sure everything was by the book. At least that’s what he said; really he wanted to see you in action.

 Towards closing before your set, Double R told you there was a special private dance for you after you left stage. It was go time. Once you were on stage with Lana Del Rey blaring around you, that stress faded away. For the next thirty minutes you got to live it up one last time. You spun around the pole teasing the audience, getting them ready. Climbing to the top of the pole, you slowly slide down while money fell around you.

  Once you were back on the ground, you bent over, grasping the pole and shaking your ass. With a leap and a little luck, your legs held you up while you leaned backwards and spun slowly. The bright flashing lights made you dizzy and you dropped to your knees during your second to last song. Fin caught your eye and you sexily crawled towards him, he raised and eye when you pulled him forward by his tie.

 “I’m meeting a special client after this, its go time,” you whispered in his ear and he nodded.

 “Liv says be careful and remember we got your back,” he tucked a few ones in your thong and you went back to performing for the crowd. As you put on your grand finale, you saw Mike head to the bathrooms, and back entrance. Nick was hanging by the private dance booths. Sonny was by the front at the bar. And Fin stood his ground next to the stage.

 After you were off stage and the money tucked away safe, Double R came for you. His grip was rough and made your skin crawl. Every instinct said to punch him and run, but you pushed forward. Had to keep all the other girls safe that could fall into his trap. He pulled you past Nick, past Mike even, and out the back door and shoved you into a waiting SVU. It pulled off and you internally panicked.

 “Even better in person,” a venomous voice called from the dark, it made you want to vomit.

 “You must be my private dance, can’t do much in here baby,” you batted your eyes and calmed when you saw the van holding Olivia, Amanda, and Rafael follow you. Behind them were the guys and you knew you’d be fine.

 “Thought we’d take this somewhere more private,” the greasy man licked his lips and your stomach turned. What a gross slimy mother fucker! He pulled you onto his lap and you spent the ride grinding against him, trying not to throw up.

 Thankfully it was a short drive to a warehouse, upon entering you knew it was his torture chamber. Cameras, medical equipment, medieval torture devices, and the like all lined the floor space. There was even an audience. Perfect, you’d get to bring down more skeevy motherfuckers.

 “What the hell is this,” you popped your hip and tried to form a plan, “I wasn’t told about an audience.”

 “Doesn’t matter what you want,” the man gripped your hair in a panful fist and jerked you to the table. You were strapped onto an exam table and people circling when they finally burst in to save you. It all went by in a blur. You were freed, people arrested, and Rafael had you in a NYPD wind breaker.

 “Saved this one for you,” Fin had the skeevy man on his knees and handed you a pair of cuffs.

 “What took you so long,” you glared.

 “Had to wait for SWAT, they were dragging their feet,” Fin laughed.

 “Figures, probably jacking off to my dancing,” you rolled your eyes and read the man his rights. It took several hours but everyone was processed and awaiting arraignment, it was Friday night and they had to wait until Monday. Perfect, it meant you got a break.

 After the initial checks in, everyone gave you space to decompress. Except for Rafael, but you didn’t mind; you’d had a thing for him since you’d met. He insisted on riding home with you. Insisted that while you showered he run around the corner for takeout. Hell he nearly invited himself to spend the night, he didn’t like that you’d been put in a position to almost be hurt. He had a thing for you too, not that you knew.

 The trial flew by and everything back to normal, Elise was thankful you’d avenged her and you were back to dancing on your own pole. You and Rafael had grown closer since the operation, best friends even. Neither of you admitting to the other your feelings, afraid it’d ruin what you had.

 One night you dropped past his office to ask if he wanted to grab a late dinner and you caught him with his pants down. Literally. He was at his desk, cock in his hand, jacking off to something on his computer. You both stared at each other frozen while Lana Del Rey played from his computer.

 “Are you jacking off to me stripping Rafi,” your hand clamped over your eyes while he put himself away.

 “Noooo,” he slammed his laptop shut and fumbled with his pants.

 “You can’t lie to me,” you peeked at him.

 “Maaayyybbbeee,” he was reduced to one word responses from the embarrassment of being caught.

 “Ah screw it,” you marched across the room to him and kissed him. His stubbled cheeks were rough against your palms, his lips soft and warm.

 “You’re not slapping me,” Rafael raised an eyebrow when you pulled away, clearly confused.

 “Nope,” you pecked his lips again, “I like you Rafael. Like like you. I want to fuck you.”

 “You what,” his eye widened and you started back peddling.

 “Forget I said anything,” you stumbled backwards to escape, but he pulled you back to him.

 “I want you too,” he kissed you, his hands roaming your body, gripping and grabbing whatever he could latch on to.

 “I came to ask you to dinner,” you panted, “But I don’t want food anymore.”

 “Food after,” he nipped your neck.

 “Come on Rafi,” you rushed him through grabbing his things, “I’m giving you a private dance.”

 The mood was set with Christmas lights and flickering candles while Lana Del Rey played. You came strutting out in tall black heels, a fishnet body suit, red thong, and heart shaped nipple tassels. Rafael nearly came in his pants right then and there. Using the pole to hold you up, you spread your legs and danced down to squatting. A quick turn and you were standing up, your ass shaking in his face. He grabbed at your hips and you swatted him away.

 “No touching,” you pulled away and jumped onto the pole to spin. Holding yourself up with your thighs, you humped the pole and palmed your chest.

 “You interrupted me before I finished,” Rafael growled, “I want to taste you.”

 “Come get it,” you dropped to the ground and leaned backwards against the pole. Rafael dropped to the ground in front of you and spread your legs. Staring into your soul, he ripped the fishnets and pushed the thong aside. His broad tongue lapped up and down your folds, sending shivers up your spine.

 “Hold on,” he demanded and lifted your leg to lay over his shoulder. You gripped the pole behind you to stay upright, the other hand tight in his hair while he ate you to completion. He was spinning you around the second your foot hit the floor, his pants dropped, and the sound of a condom being ripped open made you smirk.

 “Fuck me papi,” you wiggled your ass and he did just that.  He slipped into you so effortlessly; it was like you were made for each other. He hammered into you and you pushed back on him, giving as good as you got. While you held onto the pole for dear life, one of his hands bruised your hip and the other rubbed furiously at your swollen bundle of nerves. All too soon he was cumming, but his fingers didn’t stop until you were clenching around him.

 “Rafi,” you were drawing circles on his chest while you laid in a heap on your living room floor. Half eaten take out was on the coffee table while you recovered from round two. Or was it three?

 “Yes,” he kissed your temple.

 “I don’t want this to be a onetime thing,” you sat up abruptly, “I want all of you.”

 “I’m yours. All of me. As long as I get all of you too,” he pulled you back down against him.

 “Of course,” you breathed a sigh of relief.

 “You gave Fin really bad dances,” Rafael was laughing hysterically.

 “I wasn’t trying to fuck Fin,” you poked his side and reached for your phone, “But if you think I should give him a better show…”

 “Don’t you dare,” he snatched your phone and threw it onto the sofa, “You’re mine.”

 “What was that,” you played innocently.

 “You. Are. Mine,” each word was punctuated with a hard bite to your neck, chest, and stomach. He kept the bites and chanting of ‘mine’ up until you relented.

 “You’re mine too,” you growled and attacked his neck with bites and sucking.

 “No private dances for anyone else,” Rafael was back to his sweet self.

 “Of course not,” you stood up and stretched, reaching for a forgotten container of rice.

 “I need a shower,” he groaned as he climbed to his feet beside you.

 “Shower and cuddles,” you dropped the rice to the table.

 “Sounds perfect,” he helped you gather the leftovers and followed you to the shower. You never expected the pole dancing class to bring you the love of your life, but here you were.  

[tifu-today-i-fucked-up]

TIFU by getting rejected for a job interview before it started

I’d like to start this post by saying that I am giving this story on behalf of a friend who doesn’t use reddit. I have a friend; let’s name him John since no one will ever know who he is anyways. John has been my childhood friend, and he’s always had a short fuse. When we used to go to ride go carts, he’d always be the kid bumping into the back of you to get in front. He’s the kind of guy who will run to the door first so that he doesn���t have to wait behind an elderly person in a wheel chair in a line. Which brings me to the good part of the story.

See, even though John always wanted to be Ricky Bobby, he actually has a gentle heart but dammit to hell if he gets on the interstate and starts acting like the speed limit says 90mph MINIMUM because if you’re the person going 5 above, you’re officially a target. Well yesterday, Johnny Boy had an interview as a very very large company. I like to think that in my mind he’s blasting “Jerry Was A Race Car Driver,” chugging down chewed espresso beans and getting in the zone for this interview, all the while pushing the gas pedal down in his...Prius. Don’t know if anyone has ever had a Prius pass them in traffic, but if you’re in the Detroit area and see a Prius weaving in and out quicker than a crotch rocket, that’s John John. But the best part has yet to come...

There is a BMW, his worst enemy for slow drivers in the “privileged fast lane,” as he says, and it’s doing the speed limit. Caffeine begins to boil in his veins and anger erupts in the most blooming fashion, and he begins to ride this beamers ass. I mean he’s grabbing the hair, yanking it back and the fumes of coffee begin to spew in the air as he pulls some ADTR and says “GET. THE. FUCK. OVER.” He said he’s yelling and cussing and doing everything he can to get this guy to move over into the other 4 lanes. Eventually John is able to go a lane over, rev that 21hp engine and slides right in front of the BMW and just slams the break; almost causing a crash. Afterwards he zooms off to the exit. But wouldn’t you know, there are red lights and guess who pulls up beside Mr. Appleseed? The Beamer.

He said they start yelling at each other through the windows. I believe it’d be along the lines of satan sitting in hell saying “damn, I haven’t ever thought of using those words in sequence together.” After they’ve done everything but shoot each other, the light turns green. Both cars go along their way to their destinations. Fate is a funny thing, and so is karma. Two souls who’ve never met before end up in the same parking lot. John parks in the guest area and the Beamer parks in the executive spot. Of all the people in the world whose fates could collide, it was these two. But there’s a catch. My boy didn’t see Mr. Clean park a few rows over, but because he’s used to road rage, he goes about his day as if nothing has happened. It’s kind of scary how he can go from the hulk to Bruce Banner in a matter of seconds.

So John’s sitting in the waiting room, tightening his tie up to look crisp and hoping the new beginning of his life as his dream job is about to start when a door opens and this blinding light comes forth from the room behind it. I’d be willing to bet that he saw smoke come out. Almost like a Ceech and Chong smoke out because yep...you guessed it. Our friend in the BMW was the interviewer. You’d think John would’ve done his research, and he did. He knew who was interviewing him but what he didn’t know was that the original person would be out that day, and someone else would take his spot to interview him. John said that when they made eye contact, it was an unspoken rule that he stood up, buttoned his top clasp on his suit and walked right back out of the way he came in. For months he’s been job searching and finally had an opportunity but due to road rage, he is now sitting at home playing Forza and I’d be willing to bet my bottom dollar he’s cussing out every AI vehicle going slow in front of him.

tl;dr my friend was going for a job interview, cut off and cussed out the person who turned out to be his interviewer.

submitted by /u/bobbylink21 [link] [comments]

[joshuallyman]

you ever think about just how brotherly josh and toby are? like especially in the santos era. CAUSE I ACCIDENTALLY WROTE A HUGE ASS THING ABOUT IT. step into my josh and toby = brothers 4 lyfe essay below

so josh goes off on his own to find santos, his beautiful latino congressman from texas. toby gets mad josh is leaving.

when he talks to toby about it, toby is kind of always a straight up DICK and gets super mad josh did this without him? 

LIKE let’s go over a few of the things toby says to josh about santos

“you and your garage sale find” 

“matthew santos isn’t going to win anything”

“all you’ve got is a chance to shape the debate, strengthen the party, and you blew it!”

“you’re not supposed to try and win anything. you don’t have the man.”

like how demoralizing for josh to hear this from toby whose opinion he truly cares about so much. 

santos starts to do well and toby gets jealous i think? he’s still shitting on santos every chance he can cause i think he’s also a little mad his little brother could do this without him. he takes his anger out on josh in a few ways, like he’s ranting about how josh just dropped stuff when he left, when it all got handed off. 

toby also gets competitive? like he throws ricki rafferti into the ring just to fuck with santos and it super gets under josh’s skin and josh can’t understand WHY toby would do something like this and he asks toby why he didn’t just call and give ideas if he didn’t like what josh was doing and of course toby can’t say BECAUSE YOU HURT MY FEELINGS BY NOT COMING TO ME, YOUR BIG BROTHER, BEFORE YOU GOT SANTOS. 

there’s this:

“why the hell didn’t you come to me before you picked santos? you have any idea how strong a force we would have been if we had taken on a candidate together?” 

like woof. toby is so sad and upset josh didn’t come to him to do this together. like two normal co-workers don’t get pissed off like that, but these two, it maters. then josh tries to fix it in a truly sibling fashion 

“well I’m asking you now.”

 then TOBY keeping up with the theme here “YEAH WELL NO”. LIKE OKAY. 

you guys are supposed to be on the same team (democrats) working for the same goals but the relationship between these two is so complicated that their hurt feelings towards each other get in the way of the party’s best interest. 

THEN THE MOST BROTHERLY FASHION. WHAT HAPPENS? they get into a stupid physical fight where no one actually seems to throw a punch? like is that weird to anyone else??? their fight is so weird. they’re just like grappling with each other and neither of them throws a punch at the other.

(wow so much second hand embarrassment just from posting this) 

this is of course underscored by the fact that toby has just lost his actual brother and so he takes his anger out on the next closest thing he has to a brother which is josh.

flash forward a couple of episodes to when josh and toby run into each other while josh is waiting to talk to leo and josh extends an olive branch of sorts by telling toby

“we could have used you out there” and toby actually says something kinda nice “did okay without me”. 

and then josh basically says like hey i’m sorry i never came to you first because “it’s not the same”. this line always breaks my heart a little bit cause he’s running the santos campaign without his friends.

fast forward again and toby has been fired for the leak stuff and everything and josh goes to visit him (after a low key guilt trip from cj). toby again is standoffish and dickish towards josh since they’re still mad at each other. 

josh asks him if he’s seen the debate cause one of the morals to the story here is JOSH IS ALWAYS SEEKING TOBY’S APPROVAL. and toby in peak toby fashion insults santos. 

“kind of a rush with the prep, looked like.”

and josh gets defensive of course. since it’s kind of universally accepted that santos did really well in the debate and josh still can’t get toby to say good job. and then toby lures him into a false sense of security again by saying santos is a charismatic guy so josh is like !!!! and confides in him a little bit more and then toby shut him down again saying the president doesn’t think santos is gonna win.

and josh is sad and looks like this

and theeey’re back to fighting with each other again. so josh makes to leave and toby throws out the 

“you’re not coming back at least have the integrity to say that out loud.” 

which to me just sounds like peak toby talk where he’s really saying um hey you’re my only friend who can actually come near me and the fact you might not come back is upsetting to me.

and then josh!!! comes!!! back!!! (in his corduroy jacket which i’m still unsure about) bc he speaks toby and know what toby was really saying and then toby looks like this:

like wow josh actually cares enough and uh, josh needs toby’s approval so he’s gonna hassle toby until he gets it

“cause it’ll kill you to see me do this and succeed”

PEAK LITTLE BROTHER BEHAVIOR. like this whole campaign josh has wanted toby’s approval and the whole campaign toby has slammed the door on that and josh has finally snapped and then toby hits a nerve with josh cause he picks a point about santos that josh can’t refute. 

but after this we see josh and toby talk a lot on the phone and toby is always giving advice, like he’s actively following the campaign at home now. when they’re closing in on the election and josh is manic but he still manages to clear his head enough to listen to toby cause that’s the advice he craves so much

AND YEAH. this basically concludes my essay. josh and toby are brothers who bicker and argue and fight but can never push each other away fully because they care about each other too much. 

i also think it’s sweet how josh and toby mirror brad and richard in real life who have known each other since brad was 18?? and they bicker but love each other so much. 

~END