#Return of Chef is just not for me
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Season 10 rankings!
From best to worst:
Man Bear Pig (Ep. 6)
Tssst (Ep. 7)
Make Love Not Warcraft (Ep. 8)
The Mystery of The Urinal Deuce (Ep. 9)
Go God Go XII (Ep. 13)
Go God Go (Ep. 12)
Cartoon Wars Part 2 (Ep. 4)
Cartoon Wars Part 1 (Ep. 3)
Stanley’s Cup (Ep. 14)
Ms. Teacher Bangs A Boy (Ep. 10)
Smug Alert (Ep. 2)
Hell On Earth 2006 (Ep. 11)
The Return Of The Chef (Ep. 1)
A Million Little Fibers (Ep. 5)
#south park#quest for rankings#Lmao this season is really not for me#it has some decent episodes sure#but it has some hot garbage too#lmao I know Man Bear Pig aged really poorly#I just like seeing the boys interact honestly#don’t worry it’s not that high up over all#I hate Towlie#Return of Chef is just not for me#idk why but I just don’t enjoy it#sorry for all the chef girlies out there#Ms. teacher Bangs A Boy honestly makes some pretty good points#about how SA is treated when it’s an older woman and a young boy#Still not perfect though#Also I’m so fast I am an unstoppable cringe machine#if you disagree then feel free to let me know I’m honestly intrested to hear what others think#anyway have a great day#<3
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I have a question about the jp server pickups, since I really want knight Sebek, but I’m trying to save gems for bloom malleus + the 3rd tsum event that’s gonna show up sooner or later. Iirc, after knight Sebek, the next story update’s pickup had all of the previous story cards (ie cerberus Ortho, general Lilia, and knight Sebek). Is this true, and if it is, did it include a token system like the dorm pickups where you can just do 100 pulls and then buy the specific card you want directly? Because if that is how it works, then I can wait until then and be sure I won’t have to go to 200 for him.
we did indeed get a second chance at those three when 7-7 came out! I'm pretty sure there was not a token system -- though admittedly I don't 100% remember, sorry! 🙇 I took a quick search through some past posts/videos from people who tend to include the gacha and news stuff, but I didn't see any mention of it, so I'm inclined to think there really wasn't one. :( they were all separate pickups with their own pull counts rather than a combined one, if that info helps at all.
speaking as a strict f2p who hoards keys/gems like the lovechild of a dragon and a magpie, given the choice between saving for a story card and a birthday card, I'd go for story -- it does require a lot of patience, but there are way more opportunities to get past birthday cards, both from the anniversary events and the rerun pickups! tsums is a bit harder to say anything on because Eng doesn't follow the same event schedule, but it's a longish event and those pickups let you have a free 10-roll, so I think they're also a bit easier to save up for.
(ALSO speaking of free rolls, starting with the fifth round of birthdays -- the kutsurogi my room ones -- the birthday boy/union jacket/bloom cards have had a separate pickup that you can get two free 10-pulls at by doing missions! I got a bloom Jade from it a couple weeks ago. :D meanwhile general Lilia is the only story card I've ever managed to pull, so...I'm probably kinda biased. whoops.)
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 6 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 6 spoilers#joseimuke games are serious business#just speculating for a moment here#i could be completely wrong about all of this it's just me spitballin'#i suspect we WILL get a rerun pickup for the 7-7 and up story cards at some point#but probably not a third round of the diasomnia story boys :(#we never got a proper dorm rerun for them so i think we'll get that instead#but also that makes me wonder if we're going to maybe not get a story silver card after all...#because like#i realized earlier that since we've been getting main story drops pretty consistently every two months#(we had july + august in a row but september + october were for halloween so it averages out)#if we continue this way that means heartslabyul in january and return to diasomnia in march#which would be timed PERFECTLY for the fifth anniversary#it absolutely could just be a coincidence but. idk. i could see it being a fun place to end 7 on.#(i still think we're getting an episode 8 with grim. just. y'know. the TIMING)#but if that turns out to be true then there might not be time for a silver story card AND dorm reruns...#i mean i'm 100% talking out my butt here so i could be entirely wrong about all of it#(stay tuned for six months straight of training camp events and master chef reruns instead)#i just really want a silver story card okay#we've gotten so much silver angst and yet i demand MORE#unsuspecting anon: hey ego do you remember if there were tokens for the --#me: UUUURGH DELICIOUS SILVER TEARS#(sorry anon) (good luck with whoever you choose to pull for though! your taste in cards is excellent and i understand the dilemma 😭)
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an entirely expected side effect of me whipping out my old external HDD is that now I AM going to rewatch basically the entirety of my canon game of Inquisition that I had mostly recorded back in like '15-'16, and get my heart torn right out again by this damn guy making this damn face
he deadass goes "😢" doesn't he
#squirrel plays dragon age#dorian pavus#turn that frown on your expressive-ass face upside down or i swear i'll get my guy to kiss it off you#and THEN you'll be sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#anyway i just rewatched the trespasser scenes and that “*you* are the man i love; amatus” took me out for a solid two seconds#clutching my chest; i am once again claimed by the sickness folks#going from “you learn not to hope for more; you'd be foolish to” to “nothing will truly keep us apart” is just.... chef's kiss#.... and yeah i'm more and more sure as time goes on that they were fully setting him up to be a returning character#whether it actually winds up happening or not; i feel like the setup is very deliberate#just by virtue of him leaving no matter what; even though in a romance he clearly doesn't want to and even says as much?#with the lines implying that he had more or less promised the inquisitor that he would stay?#it feels very intentional. like they were trying to make the ending of the romance satisfying and open to be continued#WHILE making sure that he is where he needs to be for the plot
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returnal did not cure my depression but it did give me a strangely healing new perspective that makes it all a bit easier to bear. that perspective being 'I may be having a rough time right now, but at least I'm not inside the head of returnal protagonist selene vassos'
#thank god -- at least -- for that! she's going through it in ways few have ever gone through it before#returnal#selene vassos#beat the final boss today! though since the achievement says 'finished act 2'... I take it we're not done here yet haha#the cycle begins again baby!!!#I cannot convey to you just how stupidly fun this game is to play the gameplay is honestly astonishingly good#I am an avowed Platforming Hater and even I have fun with some of those parts because the mobility is done so well#and the running and shooting bits are fully *chef's kiss*#there are a couple of places where I think they don't signal quite enough what they want you to do#but hey I did figure it out eventually right lol#if anyone plays this game after me and sees this listen to my words of hard-earned wisdom... the abyssal vault stays unlocked#you only have to find and use the key the once. that's why you're running around the whole level crying b/c you can't find it#let that knowledge be my gift to you
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I have so many Thoughts I wanna say before I move on from the Public Safety Arc. There'll be manga spoilers by the way.
To be honest, I put off watching Chainsaw Man when I heard the protagonist's sole aim in life is to... touch boobs. I thought Denji was just like any other shonen MCs with perverted tendencies. I tried watching because it was animated by Mappa, but I stayed because of Aki, Denji, and Power (and Meowy). But as I reached the ending of Public Safety Arc, I realized Denji's more complex than that.
All his life Denji was deprived of basic needs; he couldn't even afford the bare minimum. He didn't get to experience love from a parent or admiration from his peers. Denji craved so much for love and affection, but the only way he knew how to get that was through sexual intimacy with a woman. Receiving affection from friends is completely foreign to him. That's why when he and Power did that in the bathroom, Denji's like, "Wait a minute... that's it?" Deep down Denji knew there's more to love than that—there's more to affection than just touching breasts. The moment he started to realize that, Makima just had to twist his mind and turn him back to his sexual urges (screw u for that makima btw).
Throughout the whole arc, Denji continued to believe in his idea that love is just about touch and sex. He ran after women after women who fulfilled that but left him feeling hollowed because, well, they tried to kill him afterwards. It's actually entertaining to watch Denji finally gets his first kiss only to get barfed on the mouth and his second got his tongue cut off. And Makima, the woman he truly loved, not only used him but also discarded him when she got what she wanted. Most of those women don't see Denji as more than a dog. Denji is just some dumb boy who doesn't deserve the normal life he's having.
But Denji really is just some boy. But he's Aki and Power's boy. There's nothing special about him. Aki and Power know that because they looked beyond the Chainsaw—they saw Denji as he is, and accepted him. People treated Denji like a dog and no one saw his worth as a person. But not Aki and Power. Aki gave him a house, taught him and Power manners, cooked for them, and taught him how to cook. Aki treated Denji and Power as his own. And Power, as unhinged and selfish as she is (affectionate), relied so much on Denji. I think that trust taught him to be a better person. To have someone rely on you can make you feel loved and respected. That's why helping Power overcome the fear of the Darkness Devil felt so natural to him. Sleeping with her on the same bed, taking a bath together, and Power walking in on him while he's on the toilet didn't feel naughty (as Denji said). The love Denji's searching for everywhere has always been in front of him: Aki and Power.
Makima can tell Denji she fabricated everything for all I care, saying everything has been a lie and that she set it all up to destroy Denji's mind and heart. But what Aki and Power felt toward Denji was real because they were the only ones who truly loved Denji without asking for anything in return. They saw him as he is, and loved him.
My precious children 🥺🥺🥺 I'm going to miss them
#the first Thoughts I had the moment I woke up#I'm a sucker for found family especially strangers turning into siblings#i really like how the love denji's looking for is just right there in front of him cooking him dinner and playing video games with him#he doesn't need to look further and compared with makima who'd only give “affection” to denji if he does what she orders#aki and power willingly give it all for denji without asking for anything in return. their love for him isn't transactional#that's why it hits so different when power's contract is “come find me” that really made me cry fr#she's asking denji “let's be together again. let's have fun again so come find me”#and aki was willing to give up his life long goal of taking down the gun devil if it meant saving denji and power#he knew denji and power are stronger than him but he joined the mission to protect them. not to get revenge on the gun devil#aki was planning to live his remaining weeks with denji and power. if he had spoken up about that maybe the two would understand#but aki got this Older Sibling Trying Not To Burden the Younger Ones. bro if you had told them you only have weeks to live#they'd do something to help you. you're their personal chef you keep them well fed ofc they'll help you#but alas tragedy makes character develop#chainsaw man#csm spoilers
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Exile in Gayville is my favorite theatre song of the twenty-first century
#'why don't you just ravage me with your white gay dan savagery' is just chefs kiss#when I knew the queerness in this show at least runs adjacent to my own#also 'is that shade you throw a crutch/bitch you protest too damn much' is just so satisfying rhythmically#I returned to ASL bc I can only listen to WGID so many times consecutively lol#Mrj release the teeth album now#a strange loop
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Just so that everyone knows the menace that is Zevran Arainai that will join my blog soon. The music that was added is also oddly perfect for him.
#ooc. [ don't try to make it logical or edit your soul according to the fashion. rather; follow your most intense obsessions mercilessly. ]#i'm so happy i've never added him before now. brand-new man. god. and a callback to inspirations that are near and dear to me.#/chef's kiss.#dragon age has a wonderful lineup. but my favorites are definitely these three. aka: zevran; dorian and solas.#/chef's kiss again.#lottie pls don't fawn. or faint.#also forgive me; i've only just returned from lunch. massive food coma. save me.
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I missed amongus server drama? 🥲
Qwerty no amount of update accounts could describe what happened
#don’t stop the party#his ass did not get hired NDA loving wife potato farm swag priest I’ll use him later the interview cyrus copper house Cyrus farm underside#the village armor spells out chef well he underwater mines tools named after master chef winners red light district what amendment is the ri#ght ti remain silent THEYRE fuckinng at the red light district all the time clings reciting poetry maybe if I finish his gift he’ll like me#when is the divorce is clings socks son because he’s mixed who is the father church so trinkets the pope then is it priest or pastor I’m not#calling him father cyrus how are you doing Cyrus I’m feeling swaggy bedrock minecraft isn’t on mac Nintendo online is $20 a year you did#lore and you’re not even on our server can I get the family tree when will my husband return from the war cyrus has the nda why are you at#the red light district trinket crying laughing#I’m gonna listen to YCGMA is your husband faithful oh well he works csn cyrus deafen the king solomon baby story recited from a techno quote#in a Cyrus fic please areus don’t tell you know clings I just want my family to be okay you don’t know what this would do to him please#he doesn’t even have a priest outfit you are not allowed to build in swag nation afyer some debate the council has considered you for the#job of pastor so how are Andy and clings related#cyrus gets tagged 5 times consecutively on a burger post. clings is in the backrooms. it’s jover.#amogus server#asks#qwerty
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ladies gender neutral i will not lie I DONT KNOW WHAT IM DOING!
#OMG THIS IS WHERE U ADD TAGS#oh it's so fun. sorry it took me so long to start a new hashtag bc i kept fucking clicking the hashtag button but i didn't realize i had to#just press return. THERE'S A CHARACTER LIMIT? my bad#i feel like i got put into the krusty krab#like i am so out of place here. a fish out of water if u will. nia help me#WHAT DO U TALK ABOUT HOW DO U ORGANIZE WITH HASHTAGS#none of these gifs r giffing btw#i wanted to use the one ratatouille gif u know the one where the chef is like ACK!#this is the best i could do#oh the way this blog is just gonna be stray kid zelink and lc. maybe a little bit of food fantasy if i come back to the game#what else r my other interests that i talk abt regularly
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1, 6 and 16?
.1. fave book? MEAN why did you ask me that when it was one of the options, hard question. My default answer is Aron Ralston's autobiography, Between a Rock and a Hard Place (what the movie 127 Hours is based on). I've read it quite a few times and Twin gave me a signed copy for Christmas one year. Idk, reading about a man's mental and physical survival journey to cutting off his own arm (and all his adventures before this moment) hits me in the right spot. Books I've read recently, as I'm getting back into the whole reading thing, I supremely enjoyed Six of Crows and The Goblin Emperor.
6. fave trope? Another hard one. For this I'll say... main character denying that they're Special as they figure out they're Special. I'm listening to The Way of Kings at work and the few chapters it took for Kal to realize something was up, making excuses for why x or y happened, was delightful.
16. fave day? Fan of Thursdays. Something about it being over the hump of the week, get to look forward to the fact that tomorrow is Friday and then the weekend. It's nice.
faves ask game
#i appreciated the goblin emperor for how straight forward it was#loved the main character and you were absolutely rewarded as a reader for paying attention and predicting things#and then obviously six of crows - kaz is a blorbo and that heist is french chef's kiss#this is now just books i enjoyed and gideon and harrow the ninths both get mentions here#gideon was just a great ride and then harrow had the *best* twist. the pov reveal i had to pause and walk around for a minute#it was So Good#and i've been enjoying Way of Kings!#my friend sent me the audio book because she and another friend are obsessed with it#so i report to them as i get to different parts and have thoughts about what's happening#fun for everyone#kaladin has the worst fucking time guy can't catch a fucking break#i have a whole prediction for where he ends up but i dont know the pacing of this series for what happens when in what book#or even what the necessary overarching plot is of the entire series#the war obviously and uniting the kingdom i suppose - and the return of the knights radiant and the implications of that#but again idk the pacing of it - i'm almost done with book 1 and Kal is still having a terrible time with bridge four#and my prediction is that he's obvi gotta get out of there and end up in a place of prominence in the army#probably with dalinar because he's not a sack of dicks - and get a shard blade#(even though he doesn't want one I know - so it has More Implications when he does accept one)#my pet theory is he gets Dal's#but - again - first he has to get out of being a bridgeman#which assume will be a terrible time for him yet again and all his fellow bridgemen will die on their escape attempt#ah fuck and then however Shallan fits the fuck into all of this what is she even doing#any way if anyone else has read way of kings/stormlight archives enjoy my probably very wrong predictions#please do not spoil it for me i'm having a great time listening and guessing#ANYWAY thank you for the ask lizzie lol#ask game response#ask response
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I don’t want to go through two breakups. I know. I... I don’t like this at all, either. The thing about the medicine was a misunderstanding, a lack of communication. We have to talk to each other. Hey, you started with your tantrums! Yes, I know! I’m here to apologize and see how we can fix this, so that things can work out. I think we could start by telling each other everything about our babies. Yes. [beat] How are you? I miss talking to you, but I know... that this is for the best. I’m not ready. Regina’s tummy is doing much better. Aw, that’s good. Well, I’m off.
#madre solo hay dos#ana servín#mariana herrera#shitty screencap posts (TM)#the more I rewatch this scene to cap it the more I love it for all its angsty goodness#ana's soft 'hola' when mariana comes in :))))#mariana having no qualms about calling ana out on her hilariously ridiculous behaviour earlier in the episode#I did love the return of the bickering because it tickles me that mariana always gives as good as she gets#mariana's soft and sad 'how are you' and ana admitting she missed her (basically in so many words)#and I'm OBSESSED by what she meant by not being ready like is she not ready to be with mariana so being apart is what's for the best#or is she not ready to see mariana on a regular basis bc it still hurts too much so the divorced wives routine is what's for the best??#what does it mean what does it all meannnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn#I'll tell you this much though this scene single-handledly filled the 50-metre hole episode 5 left in my heart so thanks for that show#seeing these two talking to each other again even if in a very stereotypically angsty otp way is truly a balm to the soul :))))#continuing with things I loved: mariana interjecting about regina's tummy almost like looking for something to fill the silence#or to change the subject to something less raw and painful than their feelings for each other ugh *chef's kiss*#AND THEN... ana's awkward hand thing when saying goodbye like she didn't know if it was ok for them to touch even in a friendly way again#and how mariana leans forward infinitesimally like to kiss her goodbye (on the cheek)#just the general awkwardness of not knowing what to do with each other in this new limbo they've walked into I LOVE THAT SHIT#and mariana's downright devastated lil face as she watches ana leave :((((#friendly reminder that she had already broken up with ferrán by then#(btw I find it hard to believe that THIS is how the great love story of mariana and ferrán will come to an end but hey I'm NOT complaining!)#so her expression is not 'I feel bad bc I'm happy in my relationship and you're still hurt and sad'#it almost reads like something is shifting within mariana that she's only now realizing after talking to ana in a friendly way after so long#brb flying into the sun#and next episode ana does ayahuasca (??!!!) and mariana gets a job offer in another city??? shit is kicking into high gear!!!!!
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I complain a lot for someone who gets to peacefully scroll through tumblr in the company of these lovely gentlemen on my day off. 💚✨🌿
#life is such a chefs salad as Lemony Snicket always says#I have this big condo all to myself#but it’s only because my family felt bad for me after my disgusting roomate who is twice my age aggressively came on to me#even as I try to take a nap and not think about it I just had sleep paralysis and thought he was here I was so fucking scared#eventually I’ll be out of time here and have to tell them that I’m not coming back#that me and the cats will just be homeless again bc fuck it we’ve done it before#but in this moment life is so good#the polycule came over for a full moon ritual and I used some of his hair that I took from his hairbrush for a return to sender spell#as above so below type shit#fuck you chad#burn in hell
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a beautiful 48 hours of professional wrestling. im catching up on details of kopw and wato and yoh both returned???? its a good time to be me
#i mean. yoh KINDA did. people.posted him goofin around outside the arena in his gear#then njpw posted a 2 second backstage of him just saying IM BAAAACK#it counts!!!!!#this on top of cole's return is just chefs kiss for me
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Kerros Severan-Laidir sounds suitably impressive and completely jarring
#Chione Laidir.... his momma wasn't a Severan original™ so the idea of her being a lord of fortune runaway is [CHEFS KISS]#or a stowaway rather - Amrun had some involvement in her being sequestered away in the relative safety of Dhavan'an#datv#datv spoilers#i love how a backstory 10 years old is being informed by a game coming out next month like augh. thedas is such a fun world to build in#anyway rion was fucking punching well above his league let me tell you#chione is so fun. a total whirlwind. i still haven't decided her ultimate fate yet#in some headcanons she dies after being struck down in a hunt gone wrong - a hunt that Calahan (rion's childhood bestie) was overseeing#but that feels very tropey and unimaginative even though it fits the story perfectly well#my other musing is that she's very much just afraid of settling. her son is an unexpected gift#but not a gift she can keep safe in the places she wants to go#so whether her and rion have some kind of arrangement? some sort of terribly tragic understanding that she has ten years to travel the worl#unimpeded by an ailing ex-lover and overly curious son#ten years before Rion has to accept his own death after overseeing countless others#like a twisted version of davy jones' curse except instead of stepping on land every 10 years it's returning to your heart#one day i will actually use the tags for their intended function but not today thank u#c: kerros severan#c: rion severan#c: chione laidir
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in a weird turn of events this episode made me cry the most what the fuck happened HAHAHAHAHAH
#i speaku#SEASON 2 CONFIRMED LESGO#i really enjoyed the first half where marcille is just manhandled and thrown around by everyone and the way izutsumi was drawn at the clima#of that part ... chefs kiss#other than that i really enjoyed the gang just hanging around together :#the latter half took me by surprise and i mean that in like#not an actual surprised or shocked way but they dealt the scene of them riding that trolley so carefully and quietly that by the time i fel#safe in a cocoon of comfort and coziness THE FEELS COME IN WITH A STEEL FUCKING CHAIR#i really like when characters just have a quiet conversation w one another and laois talking about his past was making me Feel Things#THE BG MUSIC WAS NOT FUCKING HELPING. and when the conversation turned to falin... i fucking forgor that one of the most heartbreaking#panels to ME (falin eating alone as the seasons changes) WOULD BE SHOWN ANIMATED IN THIS EP.#in pure visuals alone that probably broke me more in retrospect by the manga. but the way they weaved the music w laois' narration tinged#w regret just fucking DESTROYED ME.#AND THAT WASNT THE FUCKING END OF IT#THE MANGA HAD ME GO awww :') when marcille began crying but i genuinely began crying in earnest w her when she started talking about falin#WAS LITERALLY CRYING SOBBING THROWING UP HER VA DID AN INCREDIBLE FUCKING JOB TRANSLATING THAT SCENE INTO HEARING FORMAT#nothing is perfect and i understand the disappointment in the parts that trigger cut but god fucking damn does it provide a different way#to enjoy this story as a whole. in any case its a nice way to have people to read the manga if they ever wanted more than what trigger#could give and i think i can have peace w that#really excited for season 2 but im gonna miss them as we wait.. ty dunmesh thursday i eagerly await ur return
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(Arranged marriage to duke john price except it means you married four instead of one 👁️👁️)
Your marriage to Duke Price is one out of necessity: you need a husband before high society begins rumoring you to be a barren woman and too old to be married off, and Duke Price needs a wife who is able to take on Duchess duties of his duchies.
You do not expect love, though you suppose it’d be a nice bonus. You are merely glad that Duke Price is a reasonable handsome man, and he informs you on your wedding night that he will not force himself on you, and there is no need to immediately begin attemtping for an heir.
You take admirably to your new duties, have been raised practically for this purpose though the head butler Kyle is wonderful in helping you as well- actually all the servants have been wonderful towards you. You have regular dinners with John, though they are a bit stilted but at least Chef Johnny’s food is good enough you can easily forget the tense atmosphere. You can tell your husband is hiding something- you are sometimes barred from going to his office to him, certain rooms are not allowed for you, and you are not allowed anywhere near the letters addressed to him- but as long as it isn’t hurting you, why should you bother him? So you never ask, and he seems happy enough that you don’t.
Until you accidentally stumble upon him and Duke Riley exchanging tongues. Very heatedly, hands grasping and tugging on each other’s clothes and Duke Riley sat on your husband’s desk.
It’s hot.
What’s not so hot is the way they both look at you when they realize you are there. You stutter, face a red so fierce it’d put a furnace to shame, and bolt out of the room despite hearing John call your name.
And you also skip out on the dinners for now, pretending you are sick with the help of your maids and their makeup skills.
But suddenly, it’s like your eyes have been opened. It’s not just Duke Riley who seems to hold a part of your husband’s heart; the one time you gather enough courage to maybe go speak with John and address the situation, you see Kyle stumbling out all disheveled and flushed, though he has a very satisfied air around him. He freezes when he sees you, and your jaw drops.
“My lady-“
“I- I’ll just- I’m taking a walk! Alone!”
You go to the kitchens instead, hoping that Johnny would have something delicious you can eat. Maybe something cold enough to wash away the blush on your cheeks.
Johnny is weirdly silent, however, even as he whips up chocolate mousse for you. His silence is not normal, it feels… almost guilty…
You sighs, take in a deep breath, and gather your dress. “Johnny… are you too…-?”
“Aye, m’lady. But-“
You can’t take it anymore. You leave the kitchens, and go straight back to your bedroom to bury your face in your bed. It’s not as if you are upset! It’s just- a rather befuddling situation?
Two nights later, it’s John himself who comes to you. You had assumed it was one of your maids returning with a new jar of oil for your nightly hair routine, but it’s your husband. You are glad it’s winter, and you aren’t simply in a thin nightgown.
“Wife.” He says, voice steady yet strained.
“John.”
You can’t call him husband. You’ve spent the last two days thinking and you were… rather sad. You were in the way of whatever they had (you saw Kyle and Johnny kissing, Johnny specifically sending food addressed to Duke Riley), weren’t you?
John sighs, sitting down on the settee while you remain on your vanity. After a moment of awkward silence, he opens his eyes and looks at you. “…what do you want to remain silent about this?”
You blink, raising an eyebrow. “…huh?”
John’s fists clench. “How much do you want in return for your silence?”
Frowning, you set your brush down and fully turn to him even if you feel exposed despite your thicker nightgown. “Is this about your… partners?” You say the word delicately, then shake your head. “I want nothing, John. If you are worried about me starting anything, I won’t. I just… hope this doesn’t mean you will divorce me?”
Being a divorced woman might as well be a death sentence on its own.
He looks at you, shocked into silence, and you quickly explain; his relationships have nothing to do with you and you aren’t a petty woman, who are you to come between what he and they have? You only hope this won’t take away the protection this marriage gave you.
That night, thus, you and John reach an agreement you are sure both of you are satisfied with.
Except, months later, John is no longer satisfied.
With the ice broken between the two of you. The dinners have become so much more… relaxing and comfortable, far less than they had been. No secrecy was needed when you were around anymore, and you only giggle and look away, feigning innocence when they share tender kisses between one another… and the less polite kisses.
John can’t remain satisfied with this arrangement. You are such a sweet thing, now that he’s become to know you far better. He can see the way his men are looking at you now, something between fondness and hunger and want; Kyle helps you far more often now, despite your insistence that you can do it yourself. Even when you do it yourself, he stays by you and ensures you are comfortable.
And he joins your evening walks, arms looped as the two of you speak, laughing and giggling.
It’s similar to your late night chats with Johnny, where he plies your full of sweets and desserts until even your dreams are full of sweeter kisses you are sure will never be for you. Johnny, who cooks your favorites on hard days and who you heard from Kyle is even more serious about only having the best of the best in vegetables and meats and seasonings.
And Duke Riley… for all his stoicism, he is gentle with you. Even when he’d stared at you with doubt and mistrust, no doubt believing you to be lying to John and simply waiting for the shoe to drop and for you to ruin them. Yet it never happens, and now, during the galas you attend all dolled up on John’s arm and ignoring all murmurs about still having no children, you even dance with him and giggle at his terribly dry jokes, even share a few of your own with him.
Steadily, slowly, obliviously, John has watched each of his men fall for you. This, obviously, made you theirs. It made you his, more and more than you already were.
It’s why your current request is making him clench his glass in his hand, with Kyle looking on in displeasure as well, giving him subtle glances.
“-So that’s why I was asking, John,” you remain sweetly oblivious, adorned in a pretty dress Simon had gotten for you recently. “He will not spread any rumors, I’ll personally make sure of that-”
Your cheeks darken then, and you glance away. “I- I am… merely a bit- unsatisfied, if you understand my point. And the stable man is loyal to you, he wouldn’t say anything.”
It’s clear he needs to keep a better watch over you. Where and when did you even interact with his stable boy, Graves? Though he focused on your words.
Unsatisfied.
Well, he can’t have that, can he? You’ve done your wifely duties so admirably, it’s about time he took care of you as well… and maybe dealt with the baseless barren rumors as well. A baby would keep you nice and content and focused on them alone, wouldn’t it?
Oh yes. Yes, it would.
dukedom au masterlist
Part two
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