#Quincey deserved better

[thedoorbird]

Quincey P “take my heart back to texas” Morris

a little sketch I did in honor of my boy Quincey

A very sad Quincey P Morris day to those who …no one should be celebrating.

god the acting in re: Dracula had me in tears!

[hallaburger]

my biggest dracula movie/tv adaptation gripe is that they never. Ever. get jack seward right. and they seldom get arthur and quincey right. but nobody does jack the way he should be: young, handsome, charming, smart, deeply observant, driven by curiosity, and devoted to a fault.

the hero boys commonly feel like an afterthought by directors and screenwriters - like they're interchangeable, easily omitted or substituted, swallowed up by abraham van helsing's significance. it's really unfortunate, especially since they each feel, in the book, so lovingly created and characterized. they each have importance and i wish more people understood that.

[sunshine-zenith]

Nightcore Mamma Mia plays distantly in the background

[see-arcane]

With a total of 1,176 votes tallied, the preferred plushie poll winner with 28.8% of votes is…

What a close one! Jonathan came in with 27.7%, the mysterious Mr. Morse with 24.9% and, delicious irony of ironies, London Dracula with 18.9%. Rest in pieces. Now, what does all this mean going forward?

First, just to reconfirm: I will absolutely be looking into the costs for having more than one plushie character produced at a time. For all that Mina has the top spot if it comes down to a solo run, Nobody Wants to Separate the Gothic Horror Soulmates, even as wee little plushies. It hurts my heart to think of. Mina and Jonathan deserve to sit side by side on everyone’s pillow. Just as Quinn Morse deserves to haunt the pillow next to theirs while casually throttling and carving London Dracula into pieces. For enrichment.

But beyond that, some other key things:

How is this getting done?

Sadly, I was not a cool enough kid for Makeship to greenlight a collaboration with me. Tragique. But while I was sitting around waiting for them to get back to me, I had time to browse around for other options. During that sniffing around I dug up a couple of promising manufacturers—one of which has some really neat options for not only plush toys, but all sorts of bric-a-brac like stationery, shirts, bags, cups, et cetera—and I plan to reach out to them for quotes to start with. Nothing really gets to move forward until I can nail down prices and the amount of X plushies to be made.

I am more than a little hesitant to tell anyone MAKE ME 1000+ PLUSHIES, PLEASE, THE TUMBLR POLL SAID THEY’RE GOOD FOR IT. These aren’t as simple as print/make-on-demand products, so I need to be careful estimating the amount of folks ready and willing to drop money on the little guys. But I will keep everyone updated on the numbers regardless!

Sooo is this a crowdfunding thing or an investment or what?

Don’t know yet. I am still between jobs at the moment—reminder to check out my Ko-Fi if you want to drop me a buck or commission some art!—but if this is something I can safely drop some of my own money in with the guarantee that it will let me do better than break even, I’ll do what I can out of pocket. However, if the cost of making something of good quality turns out too steep, I’ll start looking into stuff like Kickstarter and Backerkit and so on. I want to be sure I’m not gutting anybody’s wallet to pull this off and I want to be double-sure that what we’re paying for isn’t some flimsy throwaway junk. We are all here on the same Dracula book club starving artist site, so It Has to Be Worth It and not a money-sink for anyone.

Got it. Any other info to spare?

For the plushies specifically, this is when I’ll start:

Polishing up the current four designs into cleaner illustrations with different angles to provide for mockup samples with whoever I pick to manufacture with. If I get stuck on something—(which is likely)—I may throw up another poll to bug everyone about palettes and fashion choices. I have a few more designs I haven’t dropped yet for Epilogue Harkers, a non-Bloofer Lucy, and keychains that I’d love to share too!

Eyeballing materials. I’m already picturing a very close-cut cloth for the build and clothes, but I need to decide on filling too. Stiff overstuffing to hold a pose versus softer/lighter plush for floppy cuddleability. 

Poking at other character roughs, ala the Suitor Squad, the Weird Sisters, Van Helsing, Renfield, and Baby Quincey. And if all of those go well…

…maybe some designs for other favorites in the public domain playground. (Looks meaningfully at Clarimonde, Carmilla, Victor Frankenstein and the Creature, the King in Yellow, too many others.) ((But that’s all far-future stuff at the moment.))

Cool! But you also mentioned something about other merch?

I did.

Because goddamn do I want some Dracula-themed stationery. Journals! Memo pads! Pens! Every day we don’t have these things with the Harkers’ mark upon them is a victory for the forces of Count Dracula’s document-destroying evil. Likewise for shirts, totes, mugs, keychains, face masks and other things that could use some novel-flavored goodies. Hell, I’ll probably even get on with making stuff for The Vampyres to link on my website too. Because I am. Maybe behind on that. By several months.

Anyway.

I’ve got to start working on some designs for those too while the plushie process is progressing. Pray that my carpals don’t get tunneled.

Nice! Sounds like your plate is pretty full. So that’s it, right?

:)

Arcane?

:3c

Arcane. I need you to tell me this is all you’re working on.

>:}

Arcane.

Please stand by.

I have a little treat brewing for the Dracula Dailiers and @re-dracula folks in honor of a very special day for our good friend Jonathan Harker.

[spooky-something]

Bonus doodles for Reinfield and a different John Sketch, because we couldn't fit them 💔

actually devastated, we finished Dracula and I wanna cry (I did)

Anyways, here's some silly doodles we did between each chapter whilst reading! :'D

(We'll likely redesign/resketch these characters, then post them on here, if we haven't already)

Since this copy isn't ours, the sticky notes we plan to leave in there will be shipped off to our school, where any loser in our local area may find them, so that's cool or whatever 💀💔

[astrylx]

You all said you wanted it so here we go. Things I like about Nosferatu as a Dracula adaptation vs things I don’t.

LIKE: Anna Harding

Anna Harding is the Nosferatu equivalent of Lucy Westenra, one of my absolute favorite characters in all of Dracula. So many adaptations of Dracula tend to make Lucy out to be a “slut,” and appear as if she is deserving of her fate as a victim of Dracula. This is all taken out of context by the “Why can’t a woman marry three men” line that she says. Nosferatu does not fall into this. That may be in part because instead of having three suitors, Anna has one married husband, but either way, the do not make Anna to be promiscuous and they instead utilize and showcase her true character traits.

Lucy Westenra is an innocent, loving woman, who is loyal and virtuous. She sticks by the people she loves. The line that makes her sexualized is a line showing in part her innocence and deep love. She cares for all the men in her life, and she does not want to have to choose, risking in part hurting them. Anna, in Nosferatu, is incredibly loyal to Ellen. She stands up for her and cares for her. There are even slight touches of queer undertones between Lucy and Mina in the book, if you’re looking for them. Anna has done nothing but care for the people in her life.

And then she is transformed. And the transformation, in some ways, does resemble the wantoness that takes over in the book, through her odd behaviors, and almost orgasmic expressions.

While it’s not a perfect representation of Lucy in the novel, it’s so much closer and done so much better than some others. Anna is a much more minor character than Lucy as well, but just as Lucy does, she drives the plot. And just as Lucy’s death does ultimately lead to the death of Quincey Morris, one of her courtiers, so too does Anna’s death lead to that of Friedrich, her husband.

And that brings us to the next point.

DISLIKE: Lack of Quincey Morris

I honestly don’t even think I need to go into depth in this. Quincey Morris is such a good character in the novel. The cowboy vampire slayer. He’s fantastic. A+ character. And Jonathan and Mina even name their child after him.

He and Jonathan are the ones to finally destroy Dracula, even if it ends in his own demise. Yet… in Nosferatu… he’s not there. I hate this. Justice for Quincey.

LIKE: Von Franz

Dracula adaptations have two tendencies with Van Helsing, neither of which Nosferatu falls into: Either he is the decades long enemy of Dracula, a vampire hunter, or he is the all knowledgeable man everyone relies on. The truth, Van Helsing is quite an odd character. And he’s not a vampire slayer or all knowledgeable of vampires. He simply studies many different things. It’s not that vampire knowledge is what he seeks.

Nosferatu understands this. We get to see the quirks of Van Helsing. His relation with Seward (though minimal), and his true knowledge. Plus, Willem Dafoe is exceptional in the role. It’s refreshing to see a Van Helsing that, despite any flaws in the film, actually resembles Van Helsing to me. He’s not perfect, but he feels right. Much closer than many other adaptations.

DISLIKE: Herr Knock

Look, I will admit, I am quite biased when it comes to this. To me, no one will ever come close to Dwight Frye’s Renfield. He’s just absolutely exceptional in that role, and I couldn’t ask for more. Meanwhile Herr Knock, while having his moments, is quite flat and boring to me. He lacks many of the complexities of Renfield that make him stand out. And so much of his character just feels like they jumped around, didn’t clearly plan how they wanted to use him. I could barely follow it half the time. Which isn’t always a bad thing in horror, but to me was disappointing.

Especially because I tend to view Renfield and Jonathan as interesting parallels. Jonathan could, in my opinion, have very easily ended up like Renfield. And they are even more so connected by their relations with Mina. Mina is the character that reveals Renfield’s true nature underneath the vampirism. He wants to prevent her from being like him, and to keep her safe. Meanwhile, in Nosferatu, Ellen and Herr Knock never meet.

LIKE: Thomas’ Approach to the Castle

I do have to ignore the racism to the Romani people in this, because it is… prevalent. It isn’t shocking at all because unlike some people on Reddit seem to think, I do in fact have critical thinking skills and recognize the source material, time and place of the film, and cultural ideas and views still existing. It doesn’t mean that I don’t recognize it.

But. Aside from that, the approach to the castle is done so incredibly well. It’s frightening and eerie. You can really place yourself in Thomas’ shoes and understand his fear. It works so well to establish mood and foreshadowing for the actual castle. Plus, one of my favorite scenes from the novel is utilized.

When the woman gives Jonathan a crucifix “for his mother’s sake.” That scene always just stands out to me and has such an impact, so seeing a representation of it on screen was great. I turned to the friend I was sitting beside in the theatre with a big smile, pointing and mouthing “they did the thing!!”

DISLIKE: Ellen Hutter

To me, Ellen feels almost offensive in the face of Mina. Not saying Ellen is a bad character, but when she’s the Mina of the film, it just… rubs me the wrong way. Mina is smart, loyal, clever, loving. She’s faithful and dependable. She’s incredibly, impenitently strong. So incredibly strong.

Throughout the story, Mina keeps her wits about her. Despite what is happening to her, she remains collected and calculating, showing deep strength and love. She never falters from Jonathan’s side, and she fights for her friends. She plots and she plans. The entire downfall of Dracula is orchestrated by Mina. She tracks him, and allows Jonathan and Quincey to finally destroy him.

Ellen, yes she is the one to ultimately defeat Orlok, but it’s not the same. For one, she is the summoner of Orlok, attracted to his darkness. And she destroys him by getting with him. When she isn’t doing this, she’s having fits, completely out of lucidity, and acting manic and out of control. A far cry from the strong will and composure Mina manages to hold on to. Not to mention her relationship with Thomas which will be touched on later, let me assure you of that.

And then there’s the whole aspect of her relationship with Orlok. In the book, the interactions between Lucy and Dracula, and Mina and Dracula very much come across as allegorical to SA (same with the interactions between Jonathan and the three vampire brides, but that is a conversation for another time). Therefore, writing any sort of romance between Mina and Dracula in any adaptation tends to come off to me at least as distasteful. Dracula is not Mina’s dark lover who allows her to let free the darkness inside her, the chains from the stifling world of the roles of Victorian women. Dracula is her abuser.

While yes, it is made clear that Ellen wants Thomas, not Orlok, at the end she still saves the day by being the virginal sacrifice to him, and she still summoned him with her “darkness.” It may be a reach, which I will wholeheartedly admit upon and take on my chest, but it can almost feel like it’s saying Ellen was calling to be abused…

LIKE: Wolves

In the novel, Dracula does in fact surround himself and utilizes. Not many Dracula adaptations use these wolves and the fact that Dracula can bend their wills with his own. Which is sad in an era where werewolves and vampires are often seen as enemies in popular culture (thank books like Twilight). Seeing the wolves be used, and used well, was really great. I could totally understand the terror Thomas would have felt.

DISLIKE: The Lack of Teamwork

In Dracula, all the characters, moved by Lucy’s passing, Jonathan’s torment, and Mina’s turning into a vampire, work together in order to defeat Dracula. There is a sense of camaraderie between the characters, each using their own knowledge, skills, and experience in the fight. At the end of the novel, Mina and Jonathan have named their son after the party members, a testament to the camaraderie of the group. They’re a regular old likable band of unlikely heroes.

This… is not present in Nosferatu. The characters barely work together. There isn’t a sense of connection or partnership. Friedrich fights with the group the whole time until his death. Von Franz keeps things from everyone. Thomas and Sievers feel absolutely useless for the most part. I mean, as if the lack of Quincey wasn’t enough, you go and erase any semblance of teamwork too…

LIKE: I honestly… don’t have much else to say for any likes… at least, as a Dracula adaptation. There was more I liked about the movie standalone, but this isn’t the post for that. Maybe the rats scene, not in the sense of it being a Dracula adaptation, but in the sense that it reminded me of the rats scene with Renfield from the 1931 film.

DISLIKE: The Hutters Marriage

On of my favorite lines in all of Dracula is said by Jonathan. He says, “To one thing I have made up my mind; if we find out that Mina must be a vampire in the end, then she shall not go into that unknown and terrible land alone. I suppose it is thus that in old times one vampire meant many; just as their hideous bodies could only rest in sacred earth, so the holiest love was the recruiting sergeant for their ghastly ranks.” The holiest love. Their love and commitment to each other is so strong. Jonathan is willing to live an eternity with his tormentor, with the woman he loves basically lost to him forever, just to stay by her side. Even if she cannot recognize him or love him, and is simply as Dracula’s three brides. The holiest love.

Sure, Thomas and Ellen love each other. It’s present and clear. But it’s so lacking in comparison to Jonathan and Mina. They don’t communicate, there are few scenes of them together, and the ones with them feel rushed. Meanwhile Mina crosses the country for Jonathan to marry him on his sick bed. I just wish Thomas and Ellen offered us more.

FINAL DISLIKE: Orlok’s Death

Orlok’s death feels so rushed. Just… Ellen has intercourse with him until the sun rises and he dies. Let us not forget sunlight does not kill Dracula, merely weaken him. Which is the most minor complaint over this. The scene is horrifying and beautiful. It’s scary and gothic and thrilling and chilling. None of that I will deny. But it also happens so quickly it feels quite odd. Considering the rest of the pacing of the film, you’d think the final scene, the scene of victory, would feel more complete. It doesn’t. And it is nothing like it is in the book.

Overall, as a movie I rate Nosferatu 4/5 stars. As a Dracula adaptation? 2/5 if that. It’s not Dracula and it is loosely based, but I’m rating it here strictly as a Dracula adaptation. The movie has flaws outside of the sphere of Dracula as well, which I could get into another time. But I hope you enjoyed my ramble.

If this interested you, I would love to cover other Dracula adaptations, whether Coppola’s Brad Stoked’s Dracula, the 2020 TV series, or the original Nosferatu. Please let me know!

If you have any issues with my post or anything you’d like to add or comment on, please do so and please let me know. I love criticism and conversation. Now, I wrote this with no proofreading in my free time today, so it’s likely flawed. I accept that. For now, I’m going to go nap.

Wake me up when you have a good real estate deal for me.

[thethirdromana]

Dracula characters as 2023 Eurovision finalists

This post would definitely have been better if I'd thought of it 24 hours ago.

Dracula - Germany (final points: 18)

Finishes last, by turns comical and sinister.

Arthur Holmwood - United Kingdom (final points: 24)

When your main contribution to proceedings is financial.

Jack Seward - Serbia (final points: 30)

Weird mad scientist wet cat man. Trying to look tough but we would all like to give him a hug.

Mina Murray - Austria (final points: 120)

United by being cool women who deserved a better critical response.

Abraham van Helsing - Croatia (final points: 123)

Incomprehensible old men speaking up against an invading evil.

Lucy Westenra - Czechia (final points: 129)

Feel like I could have picked any of half a dozen beautiful women singing mournfully, to be honest.

Quincey Morris - Australia (final points: 151)

Because Australia in Eurovision makes about as much sense as a cowboy in Dracula.

Jonathan Harker - Finland (final points: 526)

Starts off trapped in a box (/castle), ends up the fan favourite.

[im-out-of-it]

PSA: JUST AN ANTI WILL RANT SO IF YOU LIKE HIM YOU PROBABLY SHOULD EXIT AND ALSO COMMENTS ABOUT GABRIEL DESERVING BETTER

“why would Gabriel Lightwood hate you, Will?” Tessa asked as they went. “what did you do to him?”

excellent question Tessa. now would be a good idea to I don’t know, maybe make your own judgment on this little interaction?????

“It wasn’t anything I did to him,” Will said, stalking along at a rapid place. “It was something I did to his sister.”

now that we have this little piece of evidence, we see that Will instigated their beef first. Gabriel didn’t come after Will, Will hurt Gabriel’s sister and now you’ve got me defending Tatiana FUCKING HELL

and yes we learn later that Tatiana had a crush but what Will did was cruel and yet gabriel gets blamed when he has enough of Will’s actions

“Did you? Compromise her virtue, I mean”- Tessa

it’s funny that Will doesn’t answer this question, he does start to talking about Benedict

“and as for Gabriel’s father, let’s say that he has something of a reputation for liking demons and downworlders more than he should. I would be surprised if some of the elder lightwood’s nocturnal visits to certain houses in shadwell haven’t left him with a nasty case of demon pox.”

see, this is one of the main problems of Will. he’s literally telling Tessa basically that it’s a problem to like downworlders more than they should. Tessa, in case you aren’t aware but you are a downworlder. basically saying that they don’t deserve to be treated with respect- I may be grasping at straws but he could’ve left out downworlders and said demons and nothing much of it would have been thought badly on his part

also let’s just make shit up about some of the elder lightwoods or whatever. Will isn’t clarifying it’s only Benedict and maybe this is on the writing but some of the elder LIGHTWOOD’s meaning plural. will acts as if the whole Lightwood family murdered his own like for fucks sake I get Gabriel can be vexing in his dark moods but if you had someone hurting your sister and then constantly coming for ya, yeah I could see why that would make you more upset

but let’s analyze- Will won’t say what he did to Gabriel’s sister and now he’s outed himself as showing disgust for someone who prefers downworlders

so much for the accords when you have young shadowhunters thinking downworlders lives are nothing. and he may not say it the way I do but he could’ve let them out but he felt inclined to include them. I wouldn’t be surprised if none of the shadowhunters had romantic ties with the downworlders with the way they speak about them. Charlotte goes on and on how de Quincey has betrayed them but has she actually been kind and respectful and treated him as a person????

I’m sorry but I don’t think the downworlders are getting treated with any respect. “oh we stopped hunting you but y’all still won’t have any rights and we can still find a way to execute you”. there’s not any equality when it comes to downworlders lives and the rights they supposedly have

and oh “Gabriel is so awful” (Tessa- “so awful”) yet she hears Jem talk about compromising virtue and HE SAYS NOTHING ABOUT IT. wouldn’t that be concerning?

like this girl is getting so many red flags 🚩 thrown at her and she’s like what a fun parade we’re at!!!!!

I don’t get how anyone can like Will. I don’t care if he has a fake curse. I don’t care if he had to run from home. I’m so tired and fed up with people using trauma as an excuse to be a shitty person. and CC has made a pattern and habit of doing this whole showing zero improvement. he doesn’t treat mostly anyone with any respect. he’s lucky he has Jem because Jem is the only fucking thing likable about him

Gabriel doesn’t deserve this reputation of getting shit on when Will is the one that came after his family first. he could’ve let Tatiana down gently but he decided to be cruel. like no wonder Gabriel (and possibly Gideon) can’t stand Will’s ass

[leer-reading-lire]

Last read:

Title: Dracula

Author: Bram Stoker

Illustrator: Edward Gorey

Number of Pages: 427

Rating: ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

First published: 1897

Read: 3 May – 27 November 2023

Thoughts: 

I finally got around to re-read this novel! And I couldn’t have done it without Dracula daily and everyone in Tumblr commenting the story and sharing their art. 

I loved the experience of reading along with so many people and their posts about it always gave me food for thought. It truly made my reflections about the book richer. 

The first time I read this epistolary novel I was fifteen years old and since then I had forgotten many important plot points, as well as some characters. However, I remembered that I had loved the story, and I was fascinated by Mina Murray and Jonathan Harker. Mina was my favorite character and, back then, my favorite suitor was John Seward, followed by Quincey Morris. 

I definitely appreciated reading the letters and diaries’ entries in chronological order. I think it may be the better option for a first-time reader.

This time around I felt Jonathan’s terror, hopelessness, and desperation. I was genuinely moved by his trials and tribulations when he was held prisoner at Dracula’s castle.

I loved the voyage of the Demeter because I could feel the anxiety and fear of the sailors. The whole journey was nerve-wrecking.

A character that took me by surprised and completely won me over was Lucy Westenra. I’m angry in her behalf for all the horrible adaptations that portray her under misogynistic lights. A particularly terrifying scene for me was Mrs. Westenra’s death. And when Lucy died was heartbreaking. 

The part with the Bloofer Lady was intriguing. Here I have to say that while I had overlooked Arthur Holmwood in my first reading years ago, this time I got to appreciate his character and I could clearly see why Lucy had chosen him. He was so kind and loved her very much. They were so in love and eager to start their live together, it was all so tragic. 

Likewise, I’m in awe for John Quincey, Arthur Holmwood and Quincey Morris’ friendship. The affection that the three friends had for each other is hard to miss. I was astonished by Stoker; all his depictions of masculinity are something else. Specially, in Jonathan’s case.

Abraham van Helsing annoyed me and frustrated me for most of the time that he was on the page. I think I only warmed up to him in the final part when he and Mina traveled to Dracula’s castle.

Mina was extraordinary! I loved that she liked to ask about ghost stories, and she was so smart, organized and kind. I’m particularly keen on her hyperfixation with train schedules. 

The whole scene when Dracula attacked Mina was appalling, truly nightmarish and gruesome. I can’t for the life of me figure out why there are so many adaptations and (fan)fiction where they’re presented as a romantic couple! In my opinion, romanticize abuse is nauseating.

In general, I think pop culture has failed both Lucy and Mina and they certainly deserve better. 

The last section where the whole gang finally comes together; they miraculously stop keeping information from Mina (as they obviously should have done from the beginning); and they work together to defeat Dracula is very exciting! 

The ending was gratifying in many ways, although of course it was ultimately bittersweet. 

This is a fantastic book, extraordinarily well written and full of adventure, fright, suspense, anticipation, mystery, and action. It’s without a doubt one of my favorite novels ever. 

[gellavonhamster]

for the fandom ask meme: Dracula (og book)

my favorite female character: Mina

my favorite male character: Quincey

my favorite book/season/etc: n/a because I don't know how to modify this question to talk about a single novel

my favorite episode (if its a tv show) chapter: I have such a soft spot for Chapter V. It's just Mina and Lucy exchanging sweet letters and Lucy talking about the boys proposing to her and Quincey & Art writing to each other and Jack, well, being Jack... no horrors in sight yet, everyone's just living their best romcom lives (okay, Jack is living his worst romcom life).

my favorite cast member (in any adaptation): Frank Finlay is a GREAT Van Helsing in Count Dracula (1977). Also, Nosferatu is more of its own thing despite its origins, but I cannot not mention Isabella Adjani as Mina Lucy Harker in Nosferatu the Vampyre (1979).

my favorite ship: Jonmina, obviously, but I have to admit that Morward is quite a close second. What can I say, I love my background niche ships.

a character I’d die defending: the entire Crew of Life + Lucy do not deserve even a quarter of bad takes that exist about them in adaptations and academia

a character I just can’t sympathize with: miss me with the misunderstood Count Dracula, especially with him losing his True Love and that somehow justifying him terrorizing innocent people. The only prequel about him I'd be interested in would be his Scholomance dark academia years and it is essential that he should be a huge cunt

a character I grew to love: I wasn't much on Arthur when I read the book for the first time, but now I'm like, that's my lad. I just needed to get to know him better!

my anti otp: Dracmina goes without saying (and it's not even that I think it can't be done in a compelling way at all, it's that no one fucking does it in a compelling way!!!), but also, if I'm being honest, I don't really vibe with Helward beyond jokes and the possibility of Jack having had a crush on VH at some point. Maybe I was too deep in my Suitors OT3 and Vancula headcanons by the time Helward became more popular, maybe it just doesn't speak to me personally, idk.

[thedoorbird]

Adding a close up of the boys in honor of all their asskickery today

Actually, Bram Stoker’s Dracula

Frustrated that a good Dracula adaptation doesn’t exist I just made my own movie poster for the movie that should exist but somehow doesn’t!!!

[lauralot89]

"All right; I'll go now"; and I asked the others to wait a few minutes for me, as I had to go and see my "patient."

why is patient in quotation marks

"Take me with you, friend John," said the Professor..."May I come also?" asked Lord Godalming. "Me too?" said Quincey Morris. "May I come?" said Harker. I nodded, and we all went down the passage together.

Renfield is now a fun field trip for the class

I was so much astonished, that the oddness of introducing a madman in an asylum did not strike me at the moment

I know I say this every time, but man, psychology sucked in 1893

Honestly, I would say Seward deserves everything he gets for not listening to Renfield, but Seward isn't the only one to suffer, unfortunately

"You will, I trust, Dr. Seward, do me the justice to bear in mind, later on, that I did what I could to convince you to-night."

YOU TELL HIM

I went with the party to the search with an easy mind, for I think I never saw Mina so absolutely strong and well.

foreshadowing is a narrative device

"Say, Jack, if that man wasn't attempting a bluff, he is about the sanest lunatic I ever saw. I'm not sure, but I believe that he had some serious purpose, and if he had, it was pretty rough on him not to get a chance."

Quincey continues to be the smartest man ever

but he seems so mixed up with the Count in an indexy kind of way

in a what

I only hope we have done what is best.

you haven't

He held up a little silver whistle, as he remarked:—

"That old place may be full of rats, and if so, I've got an antidote on call."

wait

do whistles deter rats?

remind me why they thought it was a good idea to go into Carfax at night, when the Count is most powerful?

Then, taking his little silver whistle from his pocket, he blew a low, shrill call. It was answered from behind Dr. Seward's house by the yelping of dogs, and after about a minute three terriers came dashing round the corner of the house.

oh okay

The rats were multiplying in thousands, and we moved out.

sudden stupid thought that came into my head and won't leave: what if Dracula wasn't technically cooking the food in Transylvania? What if he and one of the rats there were doing their own version of Ratatouille?

More than all do I rejoice that this, our first—and perhaps our most difficult and dangerous—step has been accomplished without the bringing thereinto our most sweet Madam Mina or troubling her waking or sleeping thoughts with sights and sounds and smells of horror which she might never forget.

*cries* You are all so stupid.

She looks paler than usual. I hope the meeting to-night has not upset her. I am truly thankful that she is to be left out of our future work, and even of our deliberations. It is too great a strain for a woman to bear. I did not think so at first, but I know better now.

SO STUPID.

Even Mina must have felt its exhaustion, for though I slept till the sun was high, I was awake before her, and had to call two or three times before she awoke. Indeed, she was so sound asleep that for a few seconds she did not recognize me, but looked at me with a sort of blank terror, as one looks who has been waked out of a bad dream. She complained a little of being tired, and I let her rest till later in the day.

GUYS YOU HAVE READ THE ACCOUNTS OF LUCY'S ILLNESS AND/OR WITNESSED IT YOURSELF, PUT TWO AND TWO TOGETHER

"I know you well enough; you are the old fool Van Helsing. I wish you would take yourself and your idiotic brain theories somewhere else. Damn all thick-headed Dutchmen!"

God bless Renfield

I shall go, if I may, and cheer myself with a few happy words with that sweet soul Madam Mina

YOU SAW WHAT WAS WRONG WITH LUCY, SEE IT HERE

if she had remained in touch with the affair, it would in time infallibly have wrecked her.

sigh.

deepest longest sigh of all time.

If I hadn't gone to Whitby, perhaps poor dear Lucy would be with us now. She hadn't taken to visiting the churchyard till I came, and if she hadn't come there in the day-time with me she wouldn't have walked there in her sleep; and if she hadn't gone there at night and asleep, that monster couldn't have destroyed her as he did.

Mina no, don't do this to yourself

The gaslight which I had left lit for Jonathan, but turned down, came only like a tiny red spark through the fog, which had evidently grown thicker and poured into the room.

MINA. MINA. YOU HAVE READ LUCY'S MEMORANDUM, PUT IT TOGETHER

To be fair Mina has more of an excuse than anyone else, because Dracula is influencing her now

Suddenly the horror burst upon me that it was thus that Jonathan had seen those awful women growing into reality through the whirling mist in the moonlight, and in my dream I must have fainted, for all became black darkness.

even under Dracula's thrall she's still smarter than everyone else

but of course she won't tell anyone about this. OF COURSE.

I put my question quickly and somewhat sternly, on purpose to disconcert him. The effort succeeded; for an instant he unconsciously relapsed into his old servile manner, bent low before me, and actually fawned upon me

Seward why are you the way that you are

Blow spiders!

Does blow here mean what I think it means

Merciful God! the Count has been to him, and there is some new scheme of terror afoot!

YOU DON'T SAY

Count de Ville

Subtle, Drac. Real subtle.

[agirlwithachakram]

dracula cast but everyone's like twenty years older because I think that's interesting, why didn't mina and lucy get married yet, and jonathan is rebooting his life as a lawyer, etc.

Mina: Laura Donnelly. give Mina PRESENCE. she walks into a room and only Van Helsing has the gall to act like she's not up for anything

Jonathan: Tom Hardy. HEAR ME OUT OKAY? I know he's all buff normally but just ask him to cut the protein shakes and pushups for a couple months and he'll be wearing period clothing anyway. he can look like an elegant victorian fellow as needed but more importantly he can scramble and he's not a big imposing dude and we already know he can pull off "mark me down as scared AND horny" when pursued by an obsessive monster. also i want to see him climb out the window, lizard fashion, and be deathly ill and terrified and cling to Mina's arm scandalously.

Quincey: Pedro Pascal. I just think it would be fun

Arthur: John Boyega. he and Lucy can be the youngsters in the Gang.

Lucy: Anna Popplewell. I haven't seen her in anything since Narnia and I want to. I think she'd make a spooky bloofer lady

Seward: Sendhil Ramamurthy. i know, Seward is kind of a tool and SR deserves better. But consider this: i want him in the movie so here he is.

Renfield: Daniel Craig, he would kill it.

VH: Now this I struggled with. I don't know enough Dutch (or Flemish?) actors. anyone got an idea?

Drac: yeah I don't know abt this one. The low hanging fruit is Mads Mikkelsen, but I think we can get more interesting. i almost want Sebastian Stan, because he is actually Romanian, i want to see him terrorize and eyefuck a stressed out Tom Hardy, he has charisma, he always gives everything he has. okay yeah. I convinced myself. Sebastian Stan for Drac. but none of this "mina's in love with drac" bullshit!

[eighthman-bound]

Re:Dracula's portrayal of Quincey Morris's tragic passing with the acting, the direction and the music was so beautifully bittersweet, it has made me even more furious at how the 90's movie casually treated Quincy's death there as an afterthought.

He deserved better; and with a mournfull, wholehearted Texas cowboy ballad in the credits, Re:Dracula have given him the send-off he deserved.

Thank you for your service, our dear friend

[fischerfrey]

A Christmas Prince; The Royal Wedding

Chapter 3: The Princess and the Ogre

Summary: Royal protocol threatens to dictate everything about Dawn and Quincey's wedding. Olympia's charity play faces obstacles.

Words: 3k

Characters:

Dawn Harvelle and Evander Alderly @potionboy3

Quincey and Olympia Alderly, Tess Brandon

Gaia Alden by @cursed-herbalist

Also featuring:

Pandora Lovelace & Nymeria Lee by @gcldensnitch, Jimmy Crouch, Maxim Raeburn, Rosa Yaxley & Evan Harvelle by @potionboy3, Rocky Weasley by @magicallymalted

Beginning | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Want to read the first fic in the series, A Christmas Prince? Click here!

Chapter 3: The Princess and the Ogre

“Your Majesties, Your Highness,” said Evander. He had a distinct look of dishevelment about him that Dawn had not expected to see.

Quincey’s personal security guard had already stepped in, ready to escort Evander out of the premises.

“It’s alright, Mr. Flitwick,” said Quincey. “He appears to be in no shape to do us any further harm.”

“Queen Isabella,” said Evander. “Merry Christmas.”

“What is it you want, Evander?” asked the queen.

“I know I deserve to be met with such hostility,” Evander continued. Dawn’s dad and Tess had made their way next to Dawn, as if to serve as his personal guard. Dawn thought it was kind of cute. Tess whispered: “Is this the bloke who…”

“Who tried to steal Quincey’s crown? Yes,” Dawn whispered back.

“Frankly, I’m amazed to see your face here, cousin,” said Quincey.

“After the… unfortunate incident last Christmas, I lost almost everything I had,” Evander explained.

“Just desserts!” Olympia chimed in.

“I don't expect you to forgive me,” said Evander. “But I wanted to say I'm sorry, and Merry Christmas…”

The entire family was looking at Evander in something of a shock. This was the last thing Dawn had expected and he was willing to bet it had not crossed the minds of anyone else in the room, either.

“And congratulations,” finished Evander, looking at Dawn and Quincey now with an expression that could almost be described as genuine. “To you both.”

He turned to leave, and Quincey stepped forward. “Wait.”

Evander stopped in his tracks, turning back to face the king. Quincey sighed and said: “I don't know how you'll ever regain our trust. But we're still family. And it's Christmas.”

Olympia looked like she was about to punch some sense into her brother. Dawn exchanged looks with his dad and aunt.

“He may stay,” Quincey told the head of security and Evander looked seemingly relieved.

“Thank you.”

“Don’t thank me yet, Olympia might actually murder you.”

Evander looked at Olympia who scowled. It seemed forgiveness didn’t come to her as easily as her brother, though Dawn wasn’t sure where all this goodwill on Quincey’s part was coming from.

~

Queen Isabella exchanged a few words with his wayward nephew, who then hovered awkwardly near the tree but didn’t touch any of the decorations. A passing waiter gave him a mug of steaming hot glühwein. Dawn decided to go over and see what he was really up to.

“Count Evander,” he said as he approached.

“Mr. Harvelle,” he replied. “Or Your Highness, soon enough.”

“What brought you to us on this… fine December evening?” Dawn asked.

“I knew you would all be together, and I thought: what better time to make my apologies?”

“I guess,” said Dawn, squinting his eyes.

“I know you don’t like me or trust me, but I’m not here to cause any trouble,” said Evander. “I’m just trying to make things right between me and my family.”

“It’s my family too, now, so if you try any shit–,” started Dawn but Evander stopped him on his tracks: “I won’t. I don’t want to go against you and my dear cousins ever again. The first round was quite humiliating enough.”

Dawn was a little pleased to hear it but hoped it wasn’t too obvious. “Quincey’s right, Olympia might actually kill you.”

“Yes, I imagine obtaining her forgiveness might be a little too optimistic.”

~

As the evening went on and the tree began to look sufficiently decorated, Evander had gained enough ground to sit on one of the couches and talk about his past year. He and his mother Amelia had a falling out and that had resulted in her cutting off all the money. It must have been a blow, but Dawn found it hard to sympathize with a count when it came to these things.

“So, what did you do?” asked Tess.

“Well, I moved to a more… modest housing arrangement,” Evander explained. “Oh, and I sold my car, that one was… difficult.”

Dawn rolled his eyes, but Tess chuckled and said: “It must have been.”

Evan sat next to Dawn and said under his breath: “Should we be worried about that one?”

“I’m always worried about Evander,” Dawn replied.

“Maybe I should kick his ass?”

Dawn laughed quietly. “Oh my god, dad.”

“I would probably lose.”

“No, you’d totally win.”

“Win what?” asked Quincey, walking up to them.

“Fist fight against Evie,” Dawn explained.

Quincey seemed to think about it for a while and then said: “You would definitely win.”

Evan grinned and Dawn smiled but then his expression turned more serious, and he asked: “Why did you let him stay?”

Quincey shrugged. “I think everyone deserves a second chance.”

~

Everything went mostly without an incident although Olympia did throw a glass bauble at Evander when he dared to laugh at Tess's joke too merrily in her presence. Dawn thought it was funny, but the queen informed them all that the bauble had been a gift from the American ambassador and now he would wonder why it doesn’t feature in any of the royal photographs.

Back in his bridal suite™️, Dawn exchanged a few messages with his friends back home. Well, back in Bristol since this was home now. It was late, too late, with Dawn’s early morning looming threateningly in the horizon.

the bristol squad; panda: wait cunt evander is back?? panda: NO panda: COUNT panda: autofill1!!! maxim: oh my god rocky: 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 dawn: where’s the lie panda: it was a typo nym: no it wasn’t jimmy: it was a freudian slip

Just when Dawn was putting his phone away, he heard a knock on his door. He crept out of bed, wondering whether it was Evander, come to assassinate him. Suddenly it made perfect sense why he had come back, acting all humble and apologetic. He certainly had some devious plan to kill Dawn and get the throne. Just in case, Dawn picked up a decorative candelabra on his way to the door. When he opened and was instead faced with Quincey, dressed in his pajamas and a fancy dressing gown, he hid the makeshift weapon behind his back and smiled.

“Quince!”

“What were you going to do with that?” the king asked, half puzzled half amused.

“Defend myself, of course, your palace security is lax, I know that from experience.”

“Dear lord…” said Quincey and grabbed Dawn’s face, kissing him. Dawn pulled him into the room and maneuvered the door shut. Quincey took the candelabra from him and deposited it on a nearby side table.

“Jesus, you could have killed someone with that,” he said.

“That was the idea, although I was expecting it to be Evander.”

“Why would Evander come to your rooms at this hour?” Quincey inquired. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

“To kill me, of course.”

Quincey laughed. “Of course.”

“Are you allowed to be here?” asked Dawn.

“Well, no, technically not.”

“Ooh, naughty,” Dawn teased.

“But I wanted to see you,” said Quincey with a soft smile.

Dawn, not immune to Quincey’s smile, kissed him and pulled him to bed.

~

The next morning, Dawn was dressed to the nines in the custom made Alderlian wedding outfit insisted upon by the queen. He felt like a complete fraud.

“It’s magnificent,” said Pince.

Rosa was frowning but remained silent.

“I can’t wear this,” said Dawn. He couldn’t even name all the different items of clothing involved.

“You must,” said Rosa. “It’s a symbol of Alderlian continuity.”

“No, it isn’t,” argued Dawn. “I want to talk to Quincey.”

“The king is busy, at the moment,” said Pince. “But I’ll make sure to note down that you want a word with him.”

“He’s going to be my husband and I need to schedule a meeting with him?” Dawn asked. He tried his best to remain calm, but this was all getting ridiculous. He wondered what Quincey was going to wear for the ceremony.

“Help me get this thing off, I need a break,” said Dawn and Rosa rushed to help him remove the outfit. None of it felt right.

~

The kitchens were empty, since it was some time until lunch, but breakfast had long since been served. Tess set a big, steaming cup of tea in front of Dawn and sat opposite to him.

“You’re my hero,” Dawn said.

Tess gave him a smile. “This is all a bit…”

“Much,” finished Dawn and Tess nodded, sagely.

“Have you settled in?” Dawn asked.

“It’s definitely been interesting to spend so much time with Evan, of all people.”

“Are you getting along?”

“Sure, I always liked him,” said Tess.

“That’s a relief,” said Dawn. “I didn’t realize they wouldn’t let me drag you two everywhere with me.”

“We’ll be fine,” Tess reassured him. “I’m just a little worried about you, though.”

Dawn sipped his tea carefully, as to not burn his tongue. “I feel like it's not my wedding. All this pomp and circumstance. It's like, at this point, I'm almost dreading the big day.”

“Marrying into royalty, of course there’s always going be parts of your life that won’t be just your own, but I think there’s a reason why the king fell in love with you, and it wasn’t your complete adherence to rules and protocol,” said Tess.

“Honestly, Tess, I didn’t think I would ever get married, much less married like… well all this,” Dawn said, motioning around vaguely to everything around him. “But shouldn’t it be about… royalty or not, about being with the person I love, with... with all the people that I love there with me?”

“When did you get so wise?” asked Tess.

“I was always wise, you just refused to see it because you were bitter that I put glue in your hair,” said Dawn.

“That’s very true.”

Dawn took a deep breath. “Christmas without mum is always going to be hard. But getting married without her being there…”

“I know,” said Tess. “I always think about her when something big happens in my life. Like when I graduated or when I launched a new tea line.”

“I guess we're both feeling that, huh?”

“I miss her every day,” Tess said.

“Me too.”

“Which reminds me,” said Tess and dug something out of her pocket. “I was supposed to give this to you as part of your wedding gift, but I figured you might need something to watch your back before the big day.”

Tess took Dawn’s hand and put a necklace on his palm. It was clear quartz with a fine leather cord. Dawn remembered seeing it on Tess many times. Dawn’s mum had given it to Tess as a present when she started high school, to bring her luck, and Tess had worn it throughout the years, up until university and beyond.

“I can’t take this,” he said, immediately.

“Yes, you can,” said Tess, and closed Dawn’s fist around the necklace.

“It’s yours.”

“You need it more than me,” said Tess. “I don’t have any big, life altering events in my horizon.”

“Tess…”

“Your mum would want you to have it. I know she would.”

Dawn sighed.

“I won’t take no for an answer.”

“Then…” Dawn started. “Thank you.”

He pulled the necklace over his head and maybe it was in his head, but it did bring him comfort. It made him feel like everything was going to be alright.

“She’d be proud of you, you know,” said Tess.

“Would she?”

“Yes. So proud.”’

~

On the car ride to Olympia’s dress rehearsal, Dawn got a rundown of The Tale of Princess Froon.

“It’s a folktale,” Olympia explained to Dawn, Evan, and Tess, but mostly Evan. “The original is much more brutal than the version told to children. Kind of like Grimm’s fairytales. A fair maiden who granted Santa Claus his magical powers, sounds wholesome, no?”

“Very,” said Evan.

“Princess Froon was coveted for her ability to grant magical powers. One day she was captured by a big, hairy ogre named Grundel…”

“Like Shrek!” said Dawn.

“No, nothing like Shrek. Grundel traps Princess Froon inside a castle made of ice…”

“Like Frozen?” Dawn tried again.

“Not at all like Frozen, Dawn, shut up. Grundel was going to eat her for breakfast, when his pet turtle…”

“Turtle?” asked Dawn. He couldn’t resist.

“Yes. His turtle found a little baby in the woods. And when he brings the baby to the castle, she cares for it and nurses it back to health. Her kindness melts the ogre's heart, and he falls in love with her.”

“The end?” asked Dawn and Olympia threw a piece of confectionery at him.

“No,” she continued. “The ogre sets the princess free, so then she turns the baby into Santa Claus. And she kisses the ogre to say goodbye and thank you, and he turns into a dashing knight in shining armor. The end.”

“And it's all true?” asked Evan.

“Obviously.”

“Fair enough,” Dawn said.

“Honestly, it’s not any less mad than strange women lying in ponds distributing swords as a basis for a system of government…,” mused Evan.

“Who's playing the ogre slash knight in shining armor?” asked Dawn.

“Just the reason for my mother’s ire,” said Olympia. “Her name’s Gaia Alden, the daughter of baron Alden.”

“Oh,” said Dawn. Suddenly it made much more sense why Isabella was so against her daughter taking part in this play.

~

The thing about Olympia’s play was that it was completely put together by amateurs on as low a budget as possible. The entire idea was to collect money for the orphanages of Alderly so the children could have a nice Christmas, complete with a heap of presents. The participation of so many members of the nobility itself had garnered quite a high society crowd. It was all in good fun, for a good cause. Olympia had told Dawn that they’d pretty much done everything themselves from sets to costumes.

“Why must you trap me here, Grundle?” Olympia spoke her line. Dawn was no actor, but he found the princess’s portrayal to be believable enough.

“Your fair beauty hurts my eyes,” said Gaia Alden, donned in the mask of the fearsome ogre. “But that is not why I trap you here. I trap you here because I want your magic!”

“You cannot force me to use it. I must believe in my heart!”

“Then I shall eat you. And your magic shall seep into my flesh and stones!”

There was a brief pause in the action and Dawn, from his front row seat, could see everyone racking their brains for how to handle this.

“I think it's ‘bones’,” Olympia whispered.

“That's what I said, isn't it?” asked Gaia. As an audience member, Dawn would have bought stones hook, line, and sinker. Maybe Grundel was a stone troll.

“Never mind. Let's move on to scene 12.”

“Right, yes,” Gaia said, clearing her throat. She motioned to her prompter and had a brief discussion with him. Just as the director was about to call action, everything went dark. For a minute, Dawn suspected a blackout but then his phone buzzed. It was Quincey calling.

“Hey,” he replied.

“Dawn,” Quincey said. “The unions are calling for a general strike. Are you still at the theater?”

“Yeah, we’re here,” said Dawn, keeping an eye on Olympia, who was frantically discussing with Gaia and some others of her theatrical troupe.

“The theater workers are also going on strike, in solidarity,” said Quincey. “I’m afraid the performance is cancelled.”

“What? Does O know?”

“I have to go,” said Quincey. “I’ll see you tonight.”

Quincey hung up and Dawn was left staring at his phone, flabbergasted.

“O!” he called out, climbing up on the stage. “What’s going on?”

“I wish I knew,” said Olympia.

“It looks like the play is cancelled, Your Highness,” said Gaia, going through her phone, probably looking at news.

“Maybe they’ll get everything figured out before–,” Dawn started.

“The premiere’s tomorrow,” said Olympia. Dawn decided not to question why he hadn’t been made aware of this, same as many other things going on in Alderly.

“I’m sorry, Olympia,” said Gaia. “You made a brilliant Princess Froon.”

“Fuck,” said Olympia.

“C’mon, O,” said Dawn. “It’s going to be alright.”

“People are going to want their tickets refunded,” Olympia said. “But we used most of the money already. On the kids.”

Dawn put a hand on Olympia’s shoulder. “We’ll figure this out. Come on, we have to go before your security detail thinks Miss Alden and I kidnapped you.”

“That would be bad,” said Gaia.

“Alright,” Olympia sighed, and they headed out of the theater hall.

~

“Merry Christmas, your highnesses,” said Gaia once they were outside. “For what it’s worth, I'm sorry we won’t be able to do the play. It was fun.”

Olympia smiled. “You made a brilliant ogre, Gaia,” she said.

“Thanks…?”

“And an even better knight in shining armor,” the princess added, taking both of Gaia’s hands in hers and leaning in to kiss her cheek. Something about the gesture made Dawn avert his eyes. Gaia left in her own car and Dawn and Olympia entered theirs.

“Fucking hell,” Olympia said.

“Can the crown pay the refunds?” asked Dawn.

“Not easily.”

“Well… shit.”

“Mother did tell me not to do this,” Olympia said, leaning her head back against the leather seat.

Dawn thought about all the hard work Olympia had put into making this play happen and an idea began to formulate in his mind. “Most of your crew is just your friends and peers, right?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

“What if we did the play at the palace?” Dawn suggested.

“What?”

“What if we just cleared room and put up a stage for the play so then you wouldn’t have to refund?”

Olympia seemed to think about it for a moment. Eventually, she said: “It could work.”

“Yeah?”

“I think it might. Oh my god, I’m texting the idea to the guys right now,” she said and took out her phone, starting to type. Dawn grinned. Maybe the Christmas play could still be saved, but then there was still the country.

tag list: @lifeofkaze, @gcldensnitch, @endlessly-cursed, @cursed-herbalist, @magicallymalted

(ask if you want to be included or removed)

[see-arcane]

Renfield (2023) Thoughts fresh from the theater

Spoilers and so on below

If I had to summarize the whole movie, it would be, “First fanfiction ever written by a middle schooler who just finished watching Dracula (1931), fell in love with its version of Renfield, and made a clumsy attempt at updating and rescuing him with an AU that gives him a massive century-long body count and a happy ending at the cost of giving only him and Dracula any real effort in character while leaving the rest of the cast to be filler.”

Which is to say, C+.

Count Cageula and Houltfield were fun and you could tell they were putting energy and joy into their roles. Everything else? Oof.

Oof.

The supporting cast’s only highlights were the support group’s members and the actress playing the mob boss Bellafrancesca—big bonus points to her for so easily selling a camp villain counterpart to Cageula; instant evil MILF4DILF chemistry in their one scene together, 11/10.

Meanwhile, the majority of the characters delivered their lines like high schoolers stumbling through their first play. Awkwafina was already wince-inducing for making her play Token Good Cop with Quincey’s name tagged on, but she acted this whole thing like she was counting down until payday. There’s one scene towards the climax where she’s tricking Cageula to get close for an attack, and her delivery has less character to it than an Alexa response.

But then, there wasn’t exactly a ton of great dialogue to work with. The few plum lines were reserved for Hoult and Cage. Everyone else got raisins.

Other practical nitpicks would be the very odd choice to go 100% on some great monster and gore prosthetics, but then revert back to early 2000s-grade CGI blood spurts. These victims were goddamn gushers. Oh, sorry, not victims—the cannon fodder baddies in the action sequences.

The victims got some good classic bloodshed! Thankfully, the only murdered innocents on screen were killed by Cageula. But, like the trailers hinted, Cageula wanted Houltfield to fetch him some innocents himself. An order we’re led to believe was some ‘new’ order that Houltfield couldn’t bring himself to follow, which would’ve been a great callback to Original Renfield who hit the brakes on obeying Dracula when it threatened Mina. And maybe this really was the first time Cageula made that an explicit order! We do get a scene where Houltfield drags in some villain corpses for Cageula to snack on with him assuming this will satisfy.

But Cageula spits the blood out, declaring it trash. He wants blood from good people.

Which, as certain reveals show, Houltfield should already know, considering he’s spent the better part of a century getting Cageula’s meals. The fact that Houltfield seems surprised at this demand for innocent victims is either him being disappointed that his plan to reduce his own secondhand villainy has been thwarted, or else it’s just a flub in the writing.

And this comes on top of a reveal that Houltfield apparently left his wife and baby daughter behind for ‘greed and power’ offered by Cageula. It’s acknowledged in-dialogue that this wasn’t Cageula’s will, just an opportunity that Houltfield went for.

(An addition that makes me a little gladder that they didn’t try to swap Jonathan Harker (or, to nod back to the 1931 version, ‘John’ Harker) for this spot. Because any version where he would leave behind Mina and their child for Dracula’s sake, no matter the interplay of manipulation or Faustian nonsense, would have been a nail too many in the coffin.)

All that said, it’s very much a mixed bag. So much so that I feel I should give the caveat that I may be being too harsh, as I am a sour little gremlin who’s spent the last year with their head in a vat of Dracula fixation juice. And it also deserves saying that there were good bits worth seeing, Houltfield was very endearing, and the gleefully evil Cageula was a laugh and a half. Watch the movie for that if nothing else. It could be there’s some gold there I missed by being too prickly.

One major silver lining? I am doubly looking forward to having Hoult portray Thomas Hutter in Robert Eggers’ upcoming Nosferatu remake. Thomas Hutter and Renfield ala 1931 are already 90% harvested Jonathan Harker parts, and this movie proves how well Hoult can play the ‘sweetheart manipulated into a bad situation’ character. I’ll take it as a good sign for that role if nothing else.