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jogetsobsessed · 5 months ago

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Dominos (Part 2 of The Prophecy) - Paul Lahote x reader

Could technically be read as a stand-alone!

I'm so sorry for the long wait for this, I simply could not figure out what I wanted to do. Also, the two OC characters are simply random and are just there as space fillers (but I did choose the name Evan from 911 #wewillgetbuddie). P.S. This has a lot of dialogue and I don't know how to properly write dialogue so oopsie.

My present to all of you for hitting 200 followers!!

Always enjoy, I hope this lived up to all your expectations!

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It hurt for a long time.

It felt like you were drowning and that you were never going to be able to surface. Life was moving in slow motion, as you grappled with the sudden change in your life.

You lost everything.

Everything important to you was gone. Your friends, your support system, the man who you loved. People tried to reach out at first. Emily and Kim called you every day for weeks, but after a while, the calls stopped coming. Embry and Quil both texted you, checking to see how you were doing and if they could help anyway, but like the calls you ignored the texts.

You felt pathetic.

They all felt bad for you and you know it. They knew how in love you were with Paul and they were all witnesses to the tragic ending. And you hated it.

Hated how people would look at you. You felt that you couldn't go anywhere without someone looking at you with sympathy in their eyes. And you could only take that for so long.

So after months of hiding in your bedroom and wallowing in your despair, you decided to make a change. You were going to do something for yourself. Something that was going to be hard, one of the hardest decisions you had ever had to make.

You found an apartment 250 miles away. Growing up you had made the almost five-hour car ride to Portland, Oregon a couple times a year, so you knew that you liked the city well enough. It was a massive change, going from small-town living to city life. But it's what you need. Being somewhere where no one knew you, where no one knew about the unnatural life that the people of the tribe lived. It was your chance to live a normal life.

--------------

Normal life suited you well.

The move had been hard at first, you left behind your parents and the few friends outside of the pack that had still been in contact with. It took a while for you to start feeling like yourself again. But that's because you didn't know who you were without Paul. Moving to Portland was a chance for you to find who you were.

Six months after you moved you experienced your very own meet cute.

It happened at work, you had blindly reached out to hit the button for the elevator when your hand met someone else's. Quickly your phone was away from your face and you looked up and swore you almost swooned.

His name was Evan.

The company he worked for had just opened up a Portland office and was renting space on the third floor. You told him you worked on the seventeenth floor when he had asked and watched the number seventeen light up. Immediately he started a conversation. It was small talk, you told him that you also had not been in Portland long and chose the simple way out by saying that a long-term relationship ended so you wanted a fresh start.

It hadn't occurred to you that he never got off on the third floor.

He rode up to the seventeenth floor just to talk to you. And once the elevator stopped and the doors started to open he asked you out. He insisted that he needed a tour guide to find the best ramen that Portland had to offer.

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5 years later

----------------

“And after that the rest is history”, you laughed as you felt Evans's arm slightly squeeze your waist in affection.

You wouldn't believe where you were, back home in Forks. You had managed to avoid it since you left because your parents moved down to just outside of Portland after they realized that your move was permanent.

Your engagement to Evan had come just over a year after you met him. After swearing up and down that after Paul you were never going to let yourself love someone again you found yourself drowning in the love that you had for Evan. And when he got down on one knee you didn't even let him finish what he was saying before you were throwing yourself in his arms shouting ‘yes’.

But your parents hadn't moved down until you Facetimed them a year after your wedding holding up ultrasound photos. They screamed and cried tears of joy, they were going to get to be grandparents. You hadn't told them everything that had happened with Paul but they knew enough. They knew that he had broken your heart and now saw how your husband was putting it back together piece by piece. They saw how happy you were.

And you are happy.

You were getting everything that you wanted, everything that he had promised you.

Marriage, a big house with a white picket fence, and children.

That’s why when you received an invite to Emily and Sam’s wedding you gladly accepted. There was no reason for you not to go, you learned a long time ago that letting the thought of Paul control your life was no way to live. If after all these years Emily still sent you an invite obviously she wanted you here.

So here you were, standing with Jared, Kim, Embry, and his imprint Ava. Kim had just about burst into tears when she saw you sitting with Evan and your son in the back of the ceremony. She was standing beside Emily at the altar and you could have sworn she almost ran back down the aisle to scoop you in her arms. And that's what she did as soon as Sam and Emily were announced as Mr and Mrs Uley.

There was so much catching up to do, that was evident. Five years of not talking to one of your best friends, especially at the stage of life all of you were in. You could see it in all of their eyes when you introduced Evan to them that they approved, it was almost a look of relief like they were glad that you had been able to move on after everything that had happened. You had both apologized for not inviting each other to your weddings but that could be forgiven. Especially when you both realize that you had young sons. Her and Jared’s son is three and your son is almost two.

The two of them quickly got along and were off playing in the designated kid's area of the field where the reception was being held. You were having so much fun laughing with old friends and introducing your husband to everyone that you almost didn't catch the moment she walked by.

Rachel Black had her arm hooked through the extended arm of some man, one that you recognized but didn't know quite where from. All you knew was that it wasn't him.

Embry was the first to clock your glance. He followed your gaze and quickly noticed who you were looking at.

“Who the hell is that?”

You had cut Jared off in the middle of his story about getting thrown out of the Mariners game and saw his eyes bug out of his head when he followed your gaze. She moved carefree throughout the wedding, stopping to say hi to people here and there as she and her mystery man made their way to a table near where her father was talking to Chief Swan.

“Her fiance”, Kim mumbled over the rim of her champagne glass.

“What!”, you were definitely louder than you had meant to be, guests nearby turning to look at you and your friends. Sheepishly you gaze at them all, a smile wincing at the sudden onset of attention.

“It’s a long story Y/N”, Embry said pleadingly. He did not want to get into this right now, you know he didn't. However, there is absolutely no way for you to let this go.

The woman who had unintentionally wrecked your relationship was now hanging off the arm of another man. And now you were wondering if that's why you hadn't seen the said man at all tonight. As far as you know he’s still one of Sam’s best friends, not that you cared to double-check.

One look from you Embry’s way was enough for him to huff and motion to an empty table a little further away from the impromptu dance floor. Pulling your husband behind you, you marched your way over plopping down on one of the empty chairs.

“I’m gonna go check on our boy”, Evan said, emphasizing the word as he kissed the top of your head and started to cross the field. You knew what he was doing, he was making everything easier. You were sure that your old friends had assumed that you had let Evan in on the pack's secret (which you had after you had gotten engaged). But you figured that he thought they would want to talk as freely if he was around. That's why you love him so much, he knew how to read a room and understood the special circumstances surrounding your past relationship and the baggage that followed you because of it.

After everyone else had made it back to the table, barring Ava who had gotten swept into a conversation with Leah and her mom, you shot them all looking waiting to see who was going to start.

“They got married…six months after you moved”

This information was shocking, I mean Paul had always been one to move fast, but six months?

“And everything was okay for a while. They seemed like they were really in love”, you flinched at Jared's words and Kim, noticing your actions, slapped her husband's chest with the back of her hand, rolling her eyes at his carelessness. Jared however wasn't phased and kept going.

“And then the fighting started. It was small things at first, we would see them bicker when walking up the steps at Em’s, or when Paul phased we could hear him replaying their argument over what to have for dinner the night before”.

He paused, taking in a deep breath, resting his hand on top of Kim’s where she had it laid on the table in front of her. Lucky for him Embry decided to take pity on his brother and cut in.

“Y/N things got bad. Paul and Rachel both have very strong ummm…personalities”. He chuckled nervously as he bit his lip. You knew this made him uncomfortable and part of you felt bad for making him tell you all of this but you needed to know. You needed to know for the sake of knowing, it's not like anything in your life was gonna change because of it. Happiness had finally found you, and part of you felt bad that Paul’s had only been temporary, even though he had shamed your heart.

“The small fights turned into screaming matches, and they weren't always private. And umm at some point the screaming escalated to the two of them breaking things. Rachel would throw glasses and beer bottles and such and Paul broke one too many kitchen chairs for them to keep replacing them”.

“Eventually we had to step in, I mean the boys had to physically step in Y/N”, Kim cut in, the look in her eyes telling you that she was reliving the drama. “Sam, Jared, and Embry let themselves into Paul and Rachel's place one day when he was home and she wasn't and they had to drag him kicking and screaming out of there practically”.

“It's not like he was abusive, it 's just that they are both so damn toxic”. Jared chuckled as he struggled to describe what it was like watching their relationship from start to finish.

The three of them filled you in on specific instances of when the crazy started to show, while also reiterating how sorry they felt for how they handled everything that night years ago.

“So where is he now?”, you blurted out. The wine finally made your head feel a little fuzzy and your filter started to thin. This question caught them off guard, the three of them exchanging awkward glances back and forth.

“I don't know, none of us do. He was supposed to be here but since last night it's been radio silence. No one has heard a word from him”, Embry said.

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You felt like you were being watched.

After finishing your conversation with your friends the four of you walked over to where the kids were running around. Evan and Ava had been making small talk as they gave the four of you space.

And now as you watched your friends interact with your son and husband you were trying to have a good time and appreciate the moment.

But you couldn't, because someone was watching your every movement.

You tried to brush it off, but the longer the night went on you could still sense it. Trying your best to act nonchalant you looked at the outskirts of the field and just beyond the tree line. You didn't want to worry anyone, especially your husband. Evan was having such a good time, he and the boys got along well and you knew that as soon as you got back home he was gonna start bugging you to come back up here.

You were scanning the tree line again when you saw something or someone. And as you squinted to get a better look your heart stopped beating.

Paul.

He was hidden (not very well) in the trees, just past the makeshift dance floor. He looked disheveled, his pants and partially unbuttoned white shirt were wrinkled and slightly dirty, no doubt from spending the entire night stalking from the trees.

He looks different from the last time you saw him, he looks…older maybe? No longer clean-shaven, some scruff was clear even from where you stood. Lines and marks litter his face and his eyes. Oh, his eyes look so tired.

His body stiffened when the two of you made eye contact and he realized that he had been caught. But he didn't skitter away like a scared animal when you excused yourself from your group, promising your husband that this should only take a minute.

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You couldn't believe it, here you were face to face with the man who you swore up and down that if you ever saw again you would kill. But here you were, face to face with him and you couldn't even think of anything to say.

Because the thing is you weren't mad at him anymore.

No, you felt bad for him.

You had everything and he had nothing.

He looked like a scared little boy as he stood before you messing with his fingers, something you remember him doing to try and relax. Gone was the macho-man personality. He looked embarrassed.

“Hi”, his voice was shy, even more unlike him than acting embarrassed.

“What do you want Paul?” he startled at your tone but you didn't care. You weren't going to give him the time of day. This conversation was not between two old friends catching up after now seeing each other for a few years. No, you were having this conversation out of necessity and necessity only.

“I just wanna talk, it's been a while”.

“Yeah I know, last time we talked you dumped me over text and when I went to try and talk to you about it hours later you didn't even look phased. Already cuddled up to your imprint”, you made sure to lace your words with venom, you wanted to make it hurt. Make him relive his actions and decisions.

His nostrils flared at your last word. He hated being reminded of her, of that bond that they still shared. The stupid bond that had ruined his life. The same bond he thought had ruined your life. But seeing you here, walking hand in hand with a man, a small child in your arms he realized he had been wrong.

The only thing that had gotten Paul through all his fights with Rachel and all the time he spent alone after was the thought of you. How after he worked through everything he could get you back. Paul knew how devastated you had been. He had never told anyone but he knew you were there that day at Emily’s. He knew you had started up the porch and decided to put his arm around Rachel, to send you a message.

In some sick way, that thought of you being alone and missing him got him through the darkness. But now he realized that he had been wrong.

You hadn't spent the past five years moping around and waiting for him to confess his love for you. The love for you which almost killed him. He had tried to shove it down, he had been blessed with an imprint, and he should be happy.

But that wasn't the case.

He hated himself for it, dragging Rachel into the mess that was his life. Because she wanted him to love her, she wanted a happy marriage and a long life with Paul. And that's what Paul thought he wanted. The bond did make Paul feel for Rachel, he wanted to protect and keep her safe. He didn't want to see her sad. But those feelings didn't stop his love for you.

You had become the center of their marital problems.

Hundreds of miles away, completely moved on and completely oblivious to the stake that you held in their relationship.

Rachel learned very quickly that she wasn't the only woman Paul loved. And she had tried to live with it for a while. Growing up she had learned how special it was to be an imprint for one of the shifters. It was devastating to realize that she would never get that from Paul.

And after a while of trying to make it work and a little intervention from their friends, they called it quits. She had moved on, meeting someone who truly loved her and could put her first.

Paul however hadn't.

“I’m sorry about that Y/N. I just wanna…”

“You wanna what Paul? I’m not playing these games, it's late and I don't wanna spend the rest of the night arguing with you, because guess what we have nothing to argue about anymore because we are nothing”

“Don't say that Y/N”

“Don't say what Paul said? Don't say that we are nothing, are you crazy? Like generally have you lost your damn mind?”

“Y/N I love you and I know you still have to feel the same, I know how upset you were after we broke up”, his voice cracked as he pleaded with you. And you couldn't help but laugh.

“We didn't break up Paul, you dumped me…over text. Five years ago might I add, and you really must have lost it. I’m fucking married Paul, I have a child with a man that I love, someone who isn't like you, he isn't a coward”.

“No, no don't say Y/N, please”, he was begging now. Full-on begging.

“Paul I have nothing to say to you because I’m not going to say anything that you wanna hear. I don't love you”.

Time seemed to stop at your admission.

The forest seemed to be still, the soft breeze dying down and the rusting of the animal inhabitants went silent. And the light from Paul's very sad eyes seemed to dim even more if that was even possible. He truly had spent all this time that you still loved him and believed that the two of you could happen again.

What happened next was something you could have never predicted, not after knowing Paul for as long as you had.

He dropped to his knees, blubbering like an infant and pleading with you.

“Y/N please, we can make this work I know we can. Just give me one more chance, I still love you”.

He was making a scene. People were starting to notice the distressed man at your feet as he sobbed into his hands pleading with you to come back to him. Luckily Jared noticed the mumbling of some people near him and immediately saw what was happening.

“Shit”, he muttered under his breath as he grabbed a fistful of Embry’s suit jacket to pull him with him as they took off jogging trying to act nonchalant. This was still their friend's wedding and there was no chance they would let Paul and his inability to get a hold of his emotions ruin it.

The rest of the pack spotted the incident and quickly jumped into action. Sam had noticed what was happening and was putting all his trust in his friends to handle it, the last thing he wanted for Emily’s day to be ruined.

“Come on buddy, I think you need to calm down”, Jared told Paul as Jacob helped him pull Paul off the ground. Paul was still breaking down, it was like the floodgates had broken. Every emotion that he had buried for so long was just pouring out of him. It was hard for the pack to watch as one of their own, someone who was normally so stoic and cocky completely broke.

“No, stop, I'm not going anywhere. She’s not listening”, he protested, trying to shove off the various sets of hands trying to control him.

“I think she's listening perfectly fine Paul, I mean come on man, she has a husband. This isn't new news”. Seth said from his spot next to you, his body slightly angled in front of yours, ready to defend if Paul lost control and shifted.

“But I still love her”, he wailed. The boys were shoving him back now, deeper into the forest, for the sake of the wedding but also partially for his dignity.

And that was the last you saw of him, getting half-carried, thrashing around like an angry toddler sobbing as he disappeared into the woods.

Once he was gone you couldn't hold it in anymore. It was your turn to sob.

Even after all the pain and suffering he had put you through you hadn't wanted to hurt him like that. Seeing someone usually so strong shatter and at your words devastated you.

You don't know how long you stood there before Kim darted in front of you and pulled you into a bone-crushing hug.

It's confusing, you didn't know why you were crying. You had no reason to feel bad after what he had done to you and everything you had said was true, after everything he had done even if you weren't happily married you wouldn't get back with him. However, you felt so guilty, like you had been the one to ruin his life, even though Paul had made his decision.

Paul had been the one to knock down the first domino and start the chain reaction. He had made his bed and now he has to lie in it.

However, while you knew all this to be true you couldn't help but call out to him, you knew he was listening, wherever they had carried him to.

“I’m sorry Paul, I’m so sorry”.

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blobsblobican (you asked to be tagged in part 2!)

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caroletheperfumeaddict · 5 months ago

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Louis livestreams to help us through the dark times

Here is a list of Louis livestreams I've compiled. Most of them were compiled over the course of FITFWT but some date from LTWT and earlier - they vary in quality and there are some duplicates, but shot from different viewpoints. Feel free to add any others you find. :) NB: you'll have to cut and paste some of the links, I don't know why. All links were working at the time of posting.

2020

London livestream: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e0or2ZerDMQ

Barcelona: https://youtube.com/watch?v=jvHXBXqR4sk&t=4s…

Madrid: https://youtube.com/watch?v=PE8NNkAt39U&list=PLZM0lUMngUKG2PhNKKxpq9CB_9RMhWfz_

2022

Louis Lokerse 2022: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL0ZNqfoCw44-F2MJuOb7DzGKp56Xalvp6

Louis Rio 2022: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpO5I7_nAZE

Louis Melbourne 2022: https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=cqvnx87wuvg

Manila: https://youtube.com/watch?v=H0LnChhArzQ…

Mexico City N3: https://youtube.com/watch?v=fUNjzwm7E8E

Dallas: https://youtube.com/watch?v=H3_oS67TU_w…

LA N1: https://youtube.com/watch?v=qkqGbYJeRds…

Portland: https://youtube.com/watch?v=zAR_GGhOwT0…

Milan: https://youtube.com/watch?v=aFfM-kSgwq0…

Taormina: https://youtube.com/watch?v=S5_OgZ9GCFs

Faith in the Future World Tour 2022-2024

2022

Pryzm N1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8uV-IGBPwXg&t=4s

Pryzm N2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Kg0J8TC6xc&t=3s

Pryzm N2 (playlist KMM to end): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLt5cIJRWJmR--kJiDDZrHOJZJ5ooFWZQ3

Shepherd’s Bush (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3_QC-3L9GXL6TTg4NcB1sqfMt9XrwLe0

2023

Uncasville: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atCdjfGtcNE&t=1s

Uncasville: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RbGvwf0vQ1E

Uncasville (Kimberly playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3R918fe46KgDnYvGsrX9sZ4Qb0bSTLB1

Gilford (Kimberly playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3R918fe46KjfMXK3R0Yc-qchBM0YuDOt

Gilford (Jess snippets): https://instagram.com/p/Cs2U9XVLtOT/?img_index=6…

Laval (Kimberly playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3R918fe46KiKPtvFcQEj381PbvvW-d8v

Laval: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8d_NakXbaTU&t=4s

Laval: (few songs, and some from Forest Hills): https://www.youtube.com/@mareeclo/search?query=louis%20tomlinson

Toronto: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gnjfYFf0ayI

Toronto (30 mins): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slt8dOOJd7M

Cuyahoga Falls (46 mins): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CYKK51OaZGQ&t=7s

Cuyahoga Falls (playlist, not full, out of order): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDrROakgOvk&list=PLN47JqnNNd98AJKaTFkU9q8Y67koILZpA&index=1

Sterling Heights (playlist, thanks to 1D clips): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcDG0A3CirddH3gORm5lb-JG

Cincinnatti (playlist, not in order): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCme743TXSo&list=PL0OWNO0y9lueVqu5cmK0rOkmkvamVQbcR

Columbus (my playlist: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4RbpiZFZ7j8&list=PLOuTN46aTVcC9NgEglvTpTbSk5lDaQG3K

Indianapolis (vlog highlights, about 17 minutes. Starts about 2.54): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qd6I8XVsUSk

St Louis: no go

Kansas City: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ug_YUAZck-k&t=1s

Milwaukee (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kbtmq1JSj3A&list=PLycEgOOgImiY84Elgd0u14IVIuZCXgh7l

Chicago: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWRcrczXb3o&t=4901s

Minneapolis (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wSEobcd2uk&list=PLycEgOOgImibQoDwFFpkEDAcqZNzpqNI9

Council Bluffs (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQ64jEqP7Ts&list=PLycEgOOgImiZaxVhd6PEgEAEZQXKQbv9z

Sioux Falls (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ngyXZF145g&list=PLycEgOOgImiZD6rbQRE1P8e7G-ODjp8Bt

Seattle: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSOiMt2_xPc&list=PLycEgOOgImiY8zP7zNh9EPdnBcAOIYlnk

Vancouver (highlights playlist, 7 songs): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLyHnFg9h41pk8WIaRdmiL8NSVkw5xGpCz

Troutdale (Jess):https://instagram.com/p/CuBXRkFOFIw/

Berkeley (Jess):https://instagram.com/p/CuGlVbWuIWD/

Berkeley https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eEW3m_2Qwy8&t=2s

Los Angeles Hollywood Bowl: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fbe6HRWSlao&t=1s

Las Vegas (Jess):https://instagram.com/p/CuLwKknvDq3/

Phoenix: (15 mins): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iwoGhh0j1Vs

Irving (my playlist, some songs and gender reveal): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcA5NhCKcVm0-qDSO39wQI-T

Austin: (almost complete, starts with KMM): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rT3TmpIwUHI

Woodlands (Jess): https://instagram.com/p/CudlhRQvoiD/

St Augustine (Kimberly playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEdHQKc2iSE&list=PL3R918fe46KgJjNBIDP6G4zA6Yh2z_CyT

Hollywood Fl (Jess): https://instagram.com/p/CuqWbPDpXVl/

Tampa (Kimberly playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kqbHTB9Jm2w&list=PL3R918fe46Kh6KSsxqRHMs8Xe-y_1rEWa

Atlanta (my playlist, half a dozen songs): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcAlWbBLyn6R316qjxMjzzdD

Nashville (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HEFQ1Qu1ijs&list=PL3R918fe46KhGsrLUiP9NQLIbmJbQyNGD

Charlotte: (my playlist, 17 songs): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcCItJdg0o16oVsRVKJKi92_

Raleigh: no go

Columbia (quiff night. My playlist, inc 6 snippets, did my best): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcAQTbk1p9c0eIh9jbTsP81Q

Columbia: (vlog, 16 minutes): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RemQ7MBqmw4

Columbia (a few songs, good quality - can’t be added to a playlist): https://www.youtube.com/@JOEJONAS2696/search?query=Louis%20tomlinson

Boston N1 part 1: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CvGm4pgJXf7/?igsh=MTYyMXBxOHB3ZWFlaA%3D%3D

Boston N1 part 2: https://www.instagram.com/reel/CvGsSYspOh_/?igsh=andqdWRtcjJ5NW1w

Boston N2: no go

Philadelphia: https://www.instagram.com/p/CvObpHlJDCF

Asbury Park: no go

Forest Hills: (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLtA8Re6VuYz-omIcyuGI1uPhlCCW-s-Q8

Hamburg: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M0Z_qM1PjX8

Copenhagen (my playlist, some snippets): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcDGvZbJDVtlU_fbzFuRBpDB

Oslo: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4JNqCm4RuAs

Stockholm (my playlist, most tracks): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcCQsBpHsWqyp5IdzXlqQm_7

Helsinki (my playlist, selected songs - what I could find): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcCoSCtacy6YT7jWNsgOpB-a

Helsinki: (most of second half of concert - creator skipped some tracks): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f_uFbfGiS6A

Tallin Estonia: no go

Riga Latvia (highlights, 20 minutes): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4e2ocxKhRY

Kaunas Lithuania (vlog 41 mins inc meet and greet): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYU9p2ToZ6w

Krakow: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wd-Ds3Uv0L0

Lodz Poland (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKSBnlYmMEc&list=PLsU9N7Y3vbPE8zRkvjrUX1Wb8X_gb4qxb

Vienna: https://youtube.com/watch?v=gHhEYyU1yDk&list=PLVbrA3oEcVDAJZY9SO_6N6n1Ke0qavXhR

Ljubljana Slovenia: no go

Budapest (highlights, inc Andrew Cushin, 30-odd minutes): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lIO8s9V8O9E

Bucharest Romania: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6yU12hPOpo

Sofia Bulgaria: no go

Athens: (my playlist, incomplete): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcBoV0yw2jEjgXCFElTBEUDC

Bilbao Spain: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bt0giPsaXyw&t=1s

Lisbon: no go.

Madrid: (my playlist, just a few songs and snippets): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcBqmeKg5kvGHanFx4EIj2Mg

Barcelona (playlist, out of order): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJuQ3R4btMw&list=PL3dpZKr_ut9NKQKBPIfz4yoZViPEMjlgd

Turin: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EKRp_vpWIw&t=3s

Turin, again: https://youtube.com/watch?v=_EKRp_vpWIw&list=RD_EKRp_vpWIw&start_radio=1…

Bologna: https://youtube.com/watch?v=Wd-Pa4QsNfY…

Esch sur Alzette Luxembourg (highlights, 37 mins): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iVDb3rxYIc

Esch sur Alzette Luxembourg (French-speaking vlog, about 15 minutes in centre): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZO_4ioFBXg

Antwerp; https://youtube.com/watch?v=cxU6e7_lXZY…

Paris (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLE5GN1hVky2vIKU1IxYedafxSsdYKvAGU

Paris: https://youtube.com/watch?v=Q-iAvmhxv-4

Paris (highlights, inc barricade jump): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-iAvmhxv-4&t=1s

Amsterdam: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HBqWfrdnyHU

Amsterdam (35 mins): https://youtube.com/watch?v=KxyMe_CHEfc…

Cologne (audio only): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l5MRo-AuX98

Prague: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GEpDLzbaf7w

Berlin (short playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcD301jjIicnQ1h2xqUR6mlr

Munich (incomplete playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcB_fpWxFptGqhf9lyTxxeRu

Munich (highlights, 37 mins): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_L14ZP9lKpw

Zurich: no go

Dublin: https://www.instagram.com/p/CzZvsPLCN1C/

Sheffield https://instagram.com/p/Cze5n6hBIR8/

Sheffield: https://youtube.com/watch?v=DGOI2AOloLA&list=PL3R918fe46KgOy3WPzUKDPhum7YPHfsyj…

Manchester:https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3R918fe46KhPZD9i75dwl1iU9on6Bz9c…

Manchester: https://youtube.com/watch?v=bW1vIEoSDvE&list=PL3R918fe46KhPZD9i75dwl1iU9on6Bz9c…

youtube

Glasgow (playlist, KMM onwards): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnGxGzE1lkc&list=PL3R918fe46KjXL7p2_EV2lPhqI_QvdF2y

Glasgow (highlights, about an hour): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WSrO_09SzVE

Brighton (GemAgathe):https://instagram.com/p/CzpWJDCiPpG/

Cardiff: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uwfV07vhxhQ&list=PL3R918fe46KgsArgMWExStCPmyKwy4b6a

London O2: https://instagram.com/p/Czw7hqMrf9F/

London O2 again: https://instagram.com/p/Czw70FaMVaW/

London O2 again (Kimberly playlist): https://youtube.com/watch?v=zs-Ghkk9s8w&list=PL3R918fe46KiuyXrvsF-_ma0wsU4KNrGp

Birmingham (my playlist, thank you to ‘H’): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcBdNfRKzgYTcRfDAeKfpqti

2024

Jakarta part 1: https://instagram.com/p/C2fNpe8PSfQ/

Jakarta part 2: https://instagram.com/reel/C2fORlJvU2g/…

Jakarta part 3: https://instagram.com/p/C2fRzW6vz0Q/

Melbourne part 1: https://instagram.com/p/C2pDVzqrKHf/

Melbourne part 2: https://instagram.com/p/C2pH91JrXfd/

Brisbane: https://instagram.com/p/C2uSBGpLYye/

Brisbane: https://instagram.com/p/C2uSTvuLUks/

Brisbane part 1: https://instagram.com/p/C2uNaRELE1V/

Brisbane part 2: https://instagram.com/p/C2uSaXorh2m/

Sydney: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pxBuJqyNFA

Sydney: https://instagram.com/p/C22AvP7LLlu/

Sydney - great sound: https://instagram.com/p/C22AdaqL05Qt9S4BNzVr9ZXpANo0qP8FrSfrek0/…

Panama City (vlog, 40 mins): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aIAfrdU4a8E

San Juan Puerto Rico: https://instagram.com/p/C6nDZrdL9wW/

San Juan Puerto Rico: https://instagram.com/p/C6nDCK1LlxTj9RVEeYmgQ7eTUg4gRSMF6jGJn40/…

Rio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gnf1mpQa1dc&t=1s

Sao Paulo: no go

Curitiba almost full show: https://youtube.com/watch?v=CtOozz9qbSQ…

Montevideo part 1: https://instagram.com/p/C7As9-ULfrS/

Montevideo encore: https://instagram.com/p/C7AvnFjLqXD/

Buenos Aires: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WshmIXEp08&t=1373s

Buenos Aires: https://instagram.com/reel/C7Ig0BUrmy-/?igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA%3D%3D…

Buenos Aires: https://instagram.com/p/C7IWh_ZO8Lz/

Buenos Aires, in the pit: https://youtube.com/watch?v=8WshmIXEp08

Asuncion (streamer not well): https://instagram.com/p/C7QOwKosX8a/

Asuncion Gabi part 1: https://instagram.com/p/C7QKDSRMXct/

Asuncion Gabi part 2: https://instagram.com/p/C7QOk_vML_j/

Santiago part 1: https://instagram.com/p/C7X2YLIsMNT/

Santiago part 2: https://instagram.com/p/C7X312iMYg_/

Santiago part 3: https://instagram.com/p/C7X_sPQsr4U/

Lima: no go

Bogota (playlist, most songs): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLteZClQIiEvw0EE5qjVbRL3WjQ2iCV-QF

San Jose Costa Rica: https://instagram.com/reel/C7nhgXYMTI8/?igsh=d3pvamx2eXp2OWl1…

Mexico city FEQW: https://youtube.com/watch?v=XT-peYum5Bo…

Mexico N3: https://youtube.com/watch?v=fUNjzw

Queretaro (poss part concert): https://instagram.com/p/C70ibURvTOC/

Guadalajara: no go

AWAY FROM HOME FESTIVALS

AFHF 1, UK: https://youtube.com/watch?v=ASLDNfDr2I4…

AFHF 1, UK: https://youtube.com/watch?v=OZHUmLg8FXA&t=902s…

AFHF 2, Spain: https://youtube.com/watch?v=zUsdEJ-5G_o&list=PLZM0lUMngUKEDS0kW4qilbif5xSnACFwz…

AFHF 3, Italy: https://youtube.com/watch?v=R_-w-oQ9pqw…

AFHF 4, Mexico (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3R918fe46Khhf7usAn0ZbrQxdaX3DkAz

FESTIVALS 2024

Tecate Pa’l Norte: https://instagram.com/reel/C5KpAHNsyxv/?igsh=MW05Mjd3dTRiOWY1Nw%3D%3D…

Tecate: https://instagram.com/reel/C5Kl7nkOXx3/…

Tecate: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wXnKc5CaxG8

Pinkpop: https://www.instagram.com/p/C8hoMz8iSpu/

Pinkpop (playlist, various): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3CElOapQ9F2gLCC01BD_uH1i00Yl_vEB

Main Square, Arras: https://instagram.com/p/C9AdgGjMIPp/

RuisRock: https://instagram.com/p/C9ISyEbMXTd/

MEO Marés Vivas, Porto; https://instagram.com/p/C9s1yj0solS/

Morrina, Coruña https://www.instagram.com/p/C952lWtIHNK/

Arenal Sound: https://instagram.com/reel/C-L0nayILAA/?igsh=bXd0M2U3YzRtMGVv…

Santander Music (half) https://www.instagram.com/reel/C-OkRx-I4Pe/?igsh=ZHhueXY0ZmRrdHIx

Untold: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtqFW2bMugc

Sziget (part 1): https://www.instagram.com/p/C-f8YYiMzg1/

Sziget (part 2): https://www.instagram.com/p/C-f90dFsW5X/

FM4 Frequency Austria: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3dpZKr_ut9NA2Cv9Z5EnBzBDnQGeZQ88

Frequency: https://instagram.com/p/C-vmvElsGzm/

Cabaret Vert Charleville (playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3dpZKr_ut9Pq0EvgnVPNNl2uHq1IhNPB

Cabaret Vert Charleville (beginning to WDBHG) : https://www.instagram.com/p/C-0cb2UIvqf/

Victorious: https://instagram.com/p/C_UE4ZVi8MR/

Victorious: https://instagram.com/p/C_BPbxjMhl6/

Zurich: https://instagram.com/p/C_EBwtEvAVN/

Festningen Norway https://instagram.com/p/C_TQizaMQ9B/

Istanbul: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOuTN46aTVcA8LBKKvEnb7cwuu5wehyTo

Lollapalooza Berlin: https://www.instagram.com/p/C_n7VONM2qZ/

Lollapalooza Berlin https://www.instagram.com/p/C_n7vBVM8Jp/

Lollapalooza Berlin (Highlights playlist): https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL3dpZKr_ut9M-0_if_pZThtaI-I2EsNy6

Superbloom Munich: https://www.instagram.com/p/C_qcyafMGZQ/

Superbloom Munich: https://www.instagram.com/p/C_qbYp0s8fI/

Superbloom Munich: https://www.instagram.com/p/C_qgK57MgHK/

#louis tomlinson #Faith in the future world tour #festivals #Youtube

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terrantravels · 1 month ago

Text

Spend Quality Time with Friends with Oregon Coast Tours and Portland City Tour

With its abundance of natural beauty and cultural charm, Oregon provides tourists with a wide range of life-changing experiences. With tour guide Multnomah Falls, the exciting Portland city trip, and the stunning Oregon Coast excursions are some of the must-see locations. The varied charm of the Pacific Northwest is aptly captured by these attractions.

The Oregon Coast stretches for over three sixty miles, showcasing rugged cliffs, sandy beaches, and charming coastal towns. Oregon Coast tours invite you to immerse yourself in this stunning landscape, with stops at famous landmarks like Haystack Rock and Cape Perpetua. The experience often includes visits to quaint seaside villages, where fresh seafood and local crafts add to the charm. For nature lovers, the coast offers opportunities to explore tide pools, spot migrating whales, and marvel at dramatic ocean vistas. Guided tours ensure you won’t miss hidden gems, from secluded beaches to historic lighthouses, making the Oregon Coast a true highlight of any trip.

Portland, a city in the center of the state, is well-known for its diverse culture and vibrant culinary scene. The ideal approach to explore Portland city tour distinct personality is to take a city tour. With the help of an informed guide, you may discover well-known sites like Pioneer Courthouse Square, Powell's City of Books, and the oddball neighborhoods that contribute to Portland's appeal. Foodies will love the opportunity to try farm-to-table food, artisan beer, and gourmet coffee. The International Rose Test Garden is one of the city's verdant parks, which lend a sense of tranquility to the urban exploration.

A trip to Oregon wouldn't be complete without taking in the stunning 620-foot Multnomah Falls, which is tucked away in the Columbia River Gorge. A Multnomah Falls tour guide enhances the experience of this natural beauty by providing priceless insights on the ecology and geology of the area. For a closer look at the falls, visitors can stroll a short distance to the Benson Bridge or explore neighboring trails that wind past gushing streams and into lush woodlands.

#Oregon Coast tours #Portland city tour #Tour guide Multnomah Falls

0 notes

mostlysignssomeportents · 1 year ago

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Google reneged on the monopolistic bargain

I'm on tour with my new novel The Bezzle! Catch me TONIGHT in SALT LAKE CITY (Feb 21, Weller Book Works) and TOMORROW in SAN DIEGO (Feb 22, Mysterious Galaxy). After that, it's LA, Seattle, Portland, Phoenix and more!

A funny thing happened on the way to the enshittocene: Google – which astonished the world when it reinvented search, blowing Altavista and Yahoo out of the water with a search tool that seemed magic – suddenly turned into a pile of shit.

Google's search results are terrible. The top of the page is dominated by spam, scams, and ads. A surprising number of those ads are scams. Sometimes, these are high-stakes scams played out by well-resourced adversaries who stand to make a fortune by tricking Google:

https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/phone-numbers-airlines-listed-google-directed-scammers-rcna94766

But often these scams are perpetrated by petty grifters who are making a couple bucks at this. These aren't hyper-resourced, sophisticated attackers. They're the SEO equivalent of script kiddies, and they're running circles around Google:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/24/passive-income/#swiss-cheese-security

Google search is empirically worsening. The SEO industry spends every hour that god sends trying to figure out how to sleaze their way to the top of the search results, and even if Google defeats 99% of these attempts, the 1% that squeak through end up dominating the results page for any consequential query:

https://downloads.webis.de/publications/papers/bevendorff_2024a.pdf

Google insists that this isn't true, and if it is true, it's not their fault because the bad guys out there are so numerous, dedicated and inventive that Google can't help but be overwhelmed by them:

https://searchengineland.com/is-google-search-getting-worse-389658

It wasn't supposed to be this way. Google has long maintained that its scale is the only thing that keeps us safe from the scammers and spammers who would otherwise overwhelm any lesser-resourced defender. That's why it was so imperative that they pursue such aggressive growth, buying up hundreds of companies and integrating their products with search so that every mobile device, every ad, every video, every website, had one of Google's tendrils in it.

This is the argument that Google's defenders have put forward in their messaging on the long-overdue antitrust case against Google, where we learned that Google is spending $26b/year to make sure you never try another search engine:

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2023-10-27/google-paid-26-3-billion-to-be-default-search-engine-in-2021

Google, we were told, had achieved such intense scale that the normal laws of commercial and technological physics no longer applied. Take security: it's an iron law that "there is no security in obscurity." A system that is only secure when its adversaries don't understand how it works is not a secure system. As Bruce Schneier says, "anyone can design a security system that they themselves can't break. That doesn't mean it works – just that it works for people stupider than them."

And yet, Google operates one of the world's most consequential security system – The Algorithm (TM) – in total secrecy. We're not allowed to know how Google's ranking system works, what its criteria are, or even when it changes: "If we told you that, the spammers would win."

Well, they kept it a secret, and the spammers won anyway.

A viral post by Housefresh – who review air purifiers – describes how Google's algorithmic failures, which send the worst sites to the top of the heap, have made it impossible for high-quality review sites to compete:

https://housefresh.com/david-vs-digital-goliaths/

You've doubtless encountered these bad review sites. Search for "Best ______ 2024" and the results are a series of near-identical lists, strewn with Amazon affiliate links. Google has endlessly tinkered with its guidelines and algorithmic weights for review sites, and none of it has made a difference. For example, when Google instituted a policy that reviewers should "discuss the benefits and drawbacks of something, based on your own original research," sites that had previously regurgitated the same lists of the same top ten Amazon bestsellers "peppered their pages with references to a ‘rigorous testing process,’ their ‘lab team,’ subject matter experts ‘they collaborated with,’ and complicated methodologies that seem impressive at a cursory look."

But these grandiose claims – like the 67 air purifiers supposedly tested in Better Homes and Gardens's Des Moines lab – result in zero in-depth reviews and no published data. Moreover, these claims to rigorous testing materialized within a few days of Google changing its search ranking and said that high rankings would be reserved for sites that did testing.

Most damning of all is how the Better Homes and Gardens top air purifiers perform in comparison to the – extensively documented – tests performed by Housefresh: "plagued by high-priced and underperforming units, Amazon bestsellers with dubious origins (that also underperform), and even subpar devices from companies that market their products with phrases like ‘the Tesla of air purifiers.’"

One of the top ranked items on BH&G comes from Molekule, a company that filed for bankruptcy after being sued for false advertising. The model BH&G chose was ranked "the worst air purifier tested" by Wirecutter and "not living up to the hype" by Consumer Reports. Either BH&G's rigorous testing process is a fiction that they infused their site with in response to a Google policy change, or BH&G absolutely sucks at rigorous testing.

BH&G's competitors commit the same sins – literally, the exact same sins. Real Simple's reviews list the same photographer and the photos seem to have been taken in the same place. They also list the same person as their "expert." Real Simple has the same corporate parent as BH&G: Dotdash Meredith. As Housefresh shows, there's a lot of Dotdash Meredith review photos that seem to have been taken in the same place, by the same person.

But the competitors of these magazines are no better. Buzzfeed lists 22 air purifiers, including that crapgadget from Molekule. Their "methodology" is to include screenshots of Amazon reviews.

A lot of the top ranked sites for air purifiers are once-great magazines that have been bought and enshittified by private equity giants, like Popular Science, which began as a magazine in 1872 and became a shambling zombie in 2023, after its PE owners North Equity LLC decided its googlejuice was worth more than its integrity and turned it into a metastatic chumbox of shitty affiliate-link SEO-bait. As Housefresh points out, the marketing team that runs PopSci makes a lot of hay out of the 150 years of trust that went into the magazine, but the actual reviews are thin anaecdotes, unbacked by even the pretense of empiricism (oh, and they loooove Molekule).

Some of the biggest, most powerful, most trusted publications in the world have a side-hustle in quietly producing SEO-friendly "10 Best ___________ of 2024" lists: Rolling Stone, Forbes, US News and Report, CNN, New York Magazine, CNN, CNET, Tom's Guide, and more.

Google literally has one job: to detect this kind of thing and crush it. The deal we made with Google was, "You monopolize search and use your monopoly rents to ensure that we never, ever try another search engine. In return, you will somehow distinguish between low-effort, useless nonsense and good information. You promised us that if you got to be the unelected, permanent overlord of all information access, you would 'organize the world's information and make it universally accessible and useful.'"

They broke the deal.

Companies like CNET used to do real, rigorous product reviews. As Housefresh points out, CNET once bought an entire smart home and used it to test products. Then Red Ventures bought CNET and bet that they could sell the house, switch to vibes-based reviewing, and that Google wouldn't even notice. They were right.

https://www.cnet.com/home/smart-home/welcome-to-the-cnet-smart-home/

Google downranks sites that spend money and time on reviews like Housefresh and GearLab, and crams botshittened content mills like BH&G into our eyeballs instead.

In 1558, Thomas Gresham coined (ahem) Gresham's Law: "Bad money drives out good." When counterfeit money circulates in the economy, anyone who gets a dodgy coin spends it as quickly as they can, because the longer you hold it, the greater the likelihood that someone will detect the fraud and the coin will become worthless. Run this system long enough and all the money in circulation is funny money.

An internet run by Google has its own Gresham's Law: bad sites drive out good. It's not just that BH&G can "test" products at a fraction of the cost of Housefresh – through the simple expedient of doing inadequate tests or no tests at all – so they can put a lot more content up that Housefresh. But that alone wouldn't let them drive Housefresh off the front page of Google's search results. For that, BH&G has to mobilize some of their savings from the no test/bad test lab to do real rigorous science: science in defeating Google's security-through-obscurity system, which lets them command the front page despite publishing worse-than-useless nonsense.

Google has lost the spam wars. In response to the plague of botshit clogging Google search results, the company has invested in…making more botshit:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/16/tweedledumber/#easily-spooked

Last year, Google did a $70b stock buyback. They also laid off 12,000 staffers (whose salaries could have been funded for 27 years by that stock buyback). They just laid off thousands more employees.

That wasn't the deal. The deal was that Google would get a monopoly, and they would spend their monopoly rents to be so good that you could just click "I'm feeling lucky" and be teleported to the very best response to your query. A company that can't figure out the difference between a scam like Better Homes and Gardens and a rigorous review site like Housefresh should be pouring every spare dime it brings in into fixing this problem. Not buying default search status on every platform so that we never try another search engine: they should be fixing their shit.

When Google admits that it's losing the war to these kack-handed spam-farmers, that's frustrating. When they light $26b/year on fire making sure you don't ever get to try anything else, that's very frustrating. When they vaporize seventy billion dollars on financial engineering and shoot one in ten engineers, that's outrageous.

Google's scale has transcended the laws of business physics: they can sell an ever-degrading product and command an ever-greater share of our economy, even as their incompetence dooms any decent, honest venture to obscurity while providing fertile ground – and endless temptation – for scammers.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/21/im-feeling-unlucky/#not-up-to-the-task

#pluralistic #monopoly #seo #dark seo #google #search #enshittification #platform decay #product reviews #spam #antitrust #trustbusting

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sometimesanalice · 2 years ago

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Hey, Sailor

Summary: It’s Fleet Week and Rooster would rather be anywhere else than on the flight deck of the USS Portland. That is, until a pretty thing in a sundress catches his eye and then suddenly his day is looking up.

Pairing: Bradley”Rooster” Bradshaw x Female Reader

Length: 5.8K

Warnings: Flirty Banter, Smut, and Bradley Bradshaw in Summer Whites (Minors DNI)

Note: When @roosterforme asks you to write her a Fleet Week fic, you write the Fleet Week fic! Here you go, Em! 💛

Normally, Rooster loved Fleet Week.

He loved the lively atmosphere and the parades. He loved the free drinks that were handed to him as soon as he entered a bar. And he especially loved all the attention he got from women when he wore his Summer Whites.

He usually came back to the ship looking less than pristine with lipstick on the collar of his uniform and hidden on other places on his body.

The USS Portland was teaming with excited families and camera-happy civilians taking in the sights from deck of the transport ship as they settled in for the five-hour journey to the San Diego. It was a Fleet Week tradition to welcome people aboard for an immersive experience, picking them up from a port further up North and then cruising along the coast before making their final docking for the week.

There were grills set up on the deck and the smell of flame kissed hamburgers and hotdogs mixed with the sea salt air. The sun was shining and the mood was light.

But this year, Rooster simply could not be bothered to give a fuck.

Especially not when he could have been home already instead of being stuck giving tours on a ship that he’d never even stepped foot on prior to three days ago when he and Hangman had been given orders to join in the procession on the vessel into the city after completing a short training deployment.

His superiors had okay-ed the terrible suggestion from some random Public Relations Specialist who clearly didn’t realize that he had better things to do with his time.

Early that morning, Bradley had stood on the dock with his arms crossed and wearing an impassive scowl as they had lifted his Super Hornet onto the flight deck like it was some kind of decorative hood ornament.

Sure, it was fun to watch the kids’ eyes get wide with excitement as they ooh-ed and ahh-ed over the features as he pointed them out, but he was getting hot and uncomfortable in his uniform in the mid-afternoon sun on the black tarmac.

He’d rather be in his service khakis like Seresin. Or better yet, naked at home in his own bed.

How Hangman had weaseled himself onto barbecue duty with a beer in his hand, Rooster would never know. The bastard probably played his Texan sir, I came out of the womb grilling shtick.

And every time he passed by the son of a bitch would give him a cocky salute with his tongs.

Jake was irritating on the best day, but today he was downright insufferable.

And he knew it had everything to do with the fact that Hangman’s girlfriend was laughing and lingering at his side, having surprised him by flying in with tickets for the coastal cruise.

At least someone was having a nice time, because it sure as shit wasn’t him.

Rooster was in the process of wrapping up his fourth tour of the day and handing out a couple of Dixie Cup hats to kids on the landing deck on the stern when he was stopped dead in his tracks and had to do a double take because he eyes were definitely playing tricks on him.

You were the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.

And he swore for a minute time slowed down as you flashed the most gorgeous smile at some Junior Officer as you laughed along with whatever undoubtedly stupid joke he’d told you. All while the wind played with the ends of your hair.

You looked like such nice girl, such a good girl in your pretty light blue sundress.

The sun was bouncing off your shoulders and the little ruffle at the hem was taunting him with the way it danced around your thighs. It coasted over your curves like water, and fit you just snug enough that there wouldn’t be any Marilyn Monroe moments on deck, much to his disappointment. But the blow was cushioned by the stunning display of your smooth, shapely legs.

From the way your breasts bounced as you walked, he knew there was no way in hell you had a bra on under that little dress.

He’s never been able to resist a bad girl wrapped up like the girl-next-door.

From the second he saw you, he knew you were just his type.

And for the first time that day Bradley is grateful to be wearing the crisp, pressed Summer Whites.

He knew how good his biceps looked in the short sleeves of his uniform. And the way his pants clung to his legs and ass. He’d been spending a lot of his free time in the gym lately and it showed.

He never did mind playing An Officer and a Gentleman when the occasion presented itself, he was always happy to help fuel some fantasies.

The last time he had worn this uniform out during Fleet Week he ended up going home with an absolute smokeshow, so hopefully whatever appeal his uniform had for him back then can still work for him now.

Fleet Week was finally looking up for him.

However, what he didn’t like was the fact that the butterbar was still dominating your attention.

He wanted that smile turned on him. Wanted to see if the look in your bright eyes would be just as playful with your gaze pinned on him instead. He wanted to be the one making you laugh.

It’s not like he’s going to go over there and lick your face like a kid might try and claim dibs on a cupcake.

No, he was going to act in accordance to his rank and station as an Officer in the United States Navy.

Securing the white cap on his head from where it’s been tucked under his arm at every opportunity he’s had that day, he straightens up to his full height and purposefully struts over to you.

Bradley’s never been one to shy away from making an entrance.

He forcefully taps the younger officer’s shoulder, and glances down when the guy turns around to get a look at his name tag.

“Ensign Hubbard, you’re up for civilian tour duties. The next one is due to start at 1400,” he looks down at his watch for dramatic effect, “Which is in about 10 minutes on the starboard bow, so you best get going if you don’t want to be late, junior.”

He might feel a little guilty for springing this on the kid if it wasn’t entirely within his right to assign him the nonexistent task 684 feet in the opposite direction- a fact he learned in preparation for giving tours all day- and away from you.

Especially when he sees how flustered the guy gets as he rushes through his salute and the stammered apologies he gives you before he takes off in a brisk jog heading towards the other side of the ship.

He stands up a bit taller and makes himself a bit broader as your eyes sweep over him.

“Apologies for interrupting, ma’am. But I’d be happy to pick up where the Ensign has left off.”

There’s no missing the appraising interest in them as you take him in.

“The tours are starting at the front of the ship now, are they?” you muse out loud with a little tilt of your head. “What are all those folks over there are lining up for then, I wonder?”

You point deliberately to the group of people who are currently being greeted by the Lieutenant who was scheduled to relieve Rooster of tour duties for the next hour.

“Mm, that sure is a mystery. But Hubbard seems like a smart kid, I wouldn’t worry too much about him.” He shrugs with an unapologetic smirk on his face.

You lift a pointed eyebrow at him.

“So, you sent him away…” the almost-but-not-quite question trailing in the breeze.

“I sent him away,” he readily agrees with a nod. His eyes catch on a golden heart-shaped locket that you’re wearing around that dainty neck as it glints in the sunlight.

A smug smile tugs at the corners of your lips as you notice where his eyes have dropped too, “You’re not even going to deny it, Sailor?”

“Nope,” he says with a grin. “And actually, it’s Lieutenant Commander.”

“Ok, Lieutenant.”

“Commander.”

You hmm contemplatively like his rank was somehow up for debate, toying with that damn little heart-shaped locket in a way that was tempting his eyes to drift further down.

Rooster didn’t think it could be possible, but you’re even prettier up close. He knew you’d be stunning, but he couldn’t have prepared himself for the way your mischievous eyes sparkled magnetically. Or for the warmth spreading in his chest with the way you are broadly smiling at him now.

The top buttons of your dress are undone one more than would be strictly considered family friendly. But Bradley wasn’t bothered by that in the least.

Clearing his throat, he notes, “It’s a nice day for a sail.”

“Ensign Hubbard and I already covered that rather riveting subject earlier,” you tease while looking at him like well, what else have you got.

“Let me try again then.” If you wanted him to put in the work, he was more than up for the challenge. “What brings you for a casual five-hour cruise down the coast on one of the Pacific Fleet’s finest?”

“Now that’s not something we got to before he was telling me about what his ribbons meant in great detail,” you say with a laugh. “Would you believe me if I said I had a deep appreciation for $1.6 billion-dollar ships purchased with Uncle Sam’s defense budget?”

He gives you a half smile as he pretends to contemplate it for a moment, “You know, for some reason, I can’t say that I would.”

“Well, shucks,” you say with an over exaggerated shrug. “What about if I said I was roped into waking up at an ungodly hour to catch a flight up here because my best friend’s boyfriend is a Naval aviator and she wanted me to keep her company for the ‘casual five-hour cruise’, as you called it.”

“Now that I believe,” he drawled. “So, what’s his name?”

“Well, she calls him Jacob. He has one of those silly callsigns too, but I always forget it,” you scrunch your nose adorably as you search for it, “Something-man.”

“You mean Bagman?”

“Yeah, that sounds right.”

He smirks to himself.

“I take it you know him then?” You wait for his nod before looking up at him from under your lashes and asking him, “Does that mean you have a callsign too?”

“Yes, ma’am. It’s Rooster.”

He doesn’t miss the way you glance down, and he definitely doesn’t hold back his pointed smirk waiting for your eyes to meet his again.

And when he gives you a cocky raise of his eyebrow, all you do is shrug.

You didn’t just look like his type, you are exactly his type.

“Rooster Bradshaw, huh?” you ask, reaching out to tap a finger on rectangular name tag on his chest. “I take it you have a first name, Lieutenant Commander?”

“Sure do,” he drawls, “But it only seems fair that I get yours in return.”

You grin knowingly at him. His cheek ticks up as you stick your hand out towards him and give him your name. It’s pretty and suits you perfectly.

Bradley says it out loud savoring the syllables in his mouth as he shakes your outstretched hand. And he gives you his in exchange.

He likes how much smaller your hand looks in his.

“Since it seems like your friend has ditched you, what do you say about getting a tour? Not to brag, but I’ve been doing it all day and I’ve got it down to a science now.”

“A private tour? Lucky me,” you purr. “Lead the way Lieutenant Commander Bradley Rooster Bradshaw.”

You knew what you were doing, he’d give you that. And he was eating it up with a spoon ready to ask for second, third, and fourth helpings.

It’s less busy on the flight deck, as people are collecting around the grills waiting for their turn in the buffet lines for the late lunch.

He starts off by showing you his aircraft, giving you a brief rundown of its features.

You run a hand over the body of his fighter jet as he wraps up his now well-practiced spiel, “Do I even want to know how much taxpayer money contributed to this?”

“It depends. Does your appreciation for Uncle Sam’s defense collection extend to F/A-18s too? Or is that strictly reserved for amphibious transport vessels?”

“I’ll keep you posted after I get the full tour,” you say coyly.

“Well then, I shouldn’t keep a lady waiting then. Should I?”

“No, you certainly should not,” you agree.

He guides you past the table that’s set up with squadron memorabilia for people to buy and to the door with a hand on your low back. He’s close enough to smell your perfume now, he wants to bury his nose in your neck to inhale the scent directly from the source.

Rooster navigates the two of you like a pro through the narrow passageways as he takes you to the mess hall where coffee and pre-sliced cakes awaited tour guests. From there he takes you to the galley, the wheelhouse, the engine control room, the 24-bed hospital ward, and the massive hull used to transport heavy machinery.

You as him thoughtful questions every now and then. And he does his best to answer them. The two of you drift closer and closer, it doesn’t escape his notice the way you brush against him when you pass by to get a closer look at some of the things he shows you.

It’s easily his favorite tour of the day.

He loves the sound of your laugh as he tells you about some of the mischief that he and members of his squadron managed to avoid getting caught doing.

Along with some of the things that they did get caught doing.

Your teasing grin and witty banter and little sundress have done a number on him. And he isn’t ready to wrap this up by delivering you back on deck until the absolute last minute he has to resume his official tour duties again.

So when he circles back to the airwing, instead of turning left when he should, he leads you to the ladder that would take you down a level.

And he knows he shouldn’t, that he could get in some big trouble for showing you areas that weren’t explicitly on the official list of tour stops. But he’s always been more of the apologize later type.

Plus, he hasn’t been on this ship for very long, it’s not his fault if he manages to get conveniently turned around.

Bradley waits at the bottom of the steep ladder, actively looking anywhere else but up as you make your descent. When you’re at level with him, he helps you down the rest of the way with a steadying hand at your waist.

And when you turn around he doesn’t step back.

You reach up and run a playful finger along the brim of his cap, “So what’s a girl got to do to get a turn wearing the hat?”

His mind flashes with images of the last time he’d let a woman wear it.

“I’ll have you know this is technically Naval property, they don’t let just anyone have one. You usually have to earn it. But for you?” he pauses and gives you a heated once over, “I’ll let you try it on for free.”

“Well, I wouldn’t want any special treatment,” you say demurely. “But I think in this case, Uncle Sam would understand. I’m a model citizen after all.”

He takes the cap off of his head and gingerly sets it on yours, “You’re something else, that’s for sure.”

It slides forward down your head, “Oh, it’s heavier than it looks.” And Rooster wishes he had his phone on him to get a picture for himself. He likes the way you look wearing his things.

“Looks good on you,” he hums, letting his finger brush against that little locket around your neck.

You run a bold hand down his chest, “Where to next, Lieutenant?”

This time he doesn’t bother to correct you, he knows the game you’re playing now.

Instead he grips your hips and pushes you against the ladder and brings his mouth to yours.You make a noise of surprise before your arms are wrapping around his neck to pull him in closer.

The kiss starts out light and teasing. Your lips are so soft beneath his. He gently grazes his teeth against your lower lip, before gliding his tongue along the seam of your mouth seeking entrance. The sweep of your tongue against his is everything. The soft moans escaping you are making his pulse thrum in his veins.

It would be so easy for him to get lost in the feeling of your perfect body against his and of the way your fingers were playing with the short hairs on the nape of his neck. But he’s already pushing the limits bringing you down here, he can’t get distracted by kissing you out in the open where anyone could stumble upon the two of you.

The small whimper that you make when he pulls away makes him grin. As does the sight of his cap sitting crookedly on your head.

He thumbs at the lipstick that’s smudged at the side of your mouth, “C’mon, I’ve got one more place I want to show you.”

This time he takes your hand as he guides you down the gray passageway and through the door on the left.

The ready room on the USS Portland is much smaller than the one’s he is familiar with from the aircraft carriers he is usually on, but the set-up is mostly the same. There are a couple of projection screens adhered on the bulkheads and there are a few rows of leather seats with a swivel tray tables attached to the arm rests.

“Tell me what happens in here.” You ask him so genuinely, so sweetly and he already knows he wouldn’t stand a chance against you with the way you flutter those eyelashes at him.

So he tells you.

He likes that you want to know these details about his job, he likes that he gets to share this with you. Even if the clock is ticking down before he has to get back on deck.

Rooster watches the tantalizing way your sundress dances around your thighs as you walk around the space. You take a seat in one of the chairs in the front row and pull the desk top over you before turning to him with a beaming smile with his cap still perched on your head.

And he is hit with a wave of affection for you so intense that it makes it hard for him to breathe for a moment.

He’s grateful when you see something else that catches your eye, giving him a moment to get himself back under control. You’ve got him feeling like he should be on his knees for you.

In the spot where he is used to seeing a lectern, on this ship there is a glossy wooden table inlaid with the ship’s coat of arm that you standing over.

“Does every ship have their own unique crest? Do you know what the symbols are for?”

He really needs to figure out who put him on tour duty and send them an Edible Arrangement or something. And maybe one for whoever put together the ten-page packet of “fun facts” that he had rolled his eyes at when he had first seen it.

“Yes, ma’am, I sure do.” He comes up to stand behind you, resting his chin on your shoulder as his arms cage you in against the table. “Yes, all ships come with their own. It’s something that the prospective commanding officers are responsible for designing when new ships are about to be launched.”

You lean forward a bit, gazing your ass against him, “Dark blue and gold are traditional Navy colors, right?” He hums confirmation into your neck, as he runs his mustache along your soft skin. He feels more than hears your sharp inhale. “What does the gear on the anchor mean?”

He drops a kiss to your shoulder, “The cog is a symbol of manufacturing, a nod to the ship’s namesake and the city’s history for building ships in World War II.”

You grab his wrist and bring his arm across your body, he takes the hint and presses in closer into you. “And the trident?”

God, you feel so perfect in his arms. Your body is fitting against his like a dream.

“The black symbolizes determination,” he murmurs into the space where you neck and shoulder meet. “And the choice of the three prongs is because it’s the third ship to be given the name.”

You lean your head to the side, and he takes the opportunity to trail open-mouth kisses up your neck. Your nails bite into his forearm in response, as you rock back against his rapidly hardening cock. “And the rose?”

“Portland is the City of Roses.”

“Does it have any other meaning?” you ask soft and breathy.

“It represents strong ties, baby. It’s a symbol for the supportive partners and wives of those serving onboard,” he whispers low and sweet into your ear.

“Bradley,” you sigh as you turn your head towards him for a kiss. It’s desperate and wet. And he can almost taste the neediness of your moan on his tongue.

He’s never done anything like this while on duty on a ship before, and the thrill of it has his veins thrumming with adrenaline.

“You’ve had me hook, line and sinker since the damn second I saw you.” He grinds himself against your ass and you whimper at the contact. “What do you want from me? I’ll be so good to you, so good for you.”

“Want you to touch me,” you pant into his mouth, “Want you to fuck me, Rooster. It’s the only thing I’ve been able to think about.”

“Fuck me.” He can feel his pulse thundering in his throat.

“I’m trying to,” you whine.

He barks a strained laugh before he spins you around, crowds you into the table. He doesn’t waste any time getting his lips back on yours, slipping his tongue into your mouth. You meet him stroke for stroke, just like you’ve been doing since the moment he laid eyes on you.

“This fucking dress,” he groans when he cups your breast through your fabric, as you fill his palm in just the right way. You arch your chest into his hand, and he was feeling entirely too self-satisfied in the confirmation that you weren’t wearing a bra. “Knew you weren’t a good girl.”

“So why are you treating me like one?” you taunt, breathlessly. Your greedy hands go straight to his cock, squeezing him through his pants.

Your hand feels so good on him.

“God, you’re so much fucking trouble,” he rasps, throwing his head back.You lean forward and your hot mouth works against the hollow of his throat.

He’s trying to undo some of the tiny buttons that line the front of your dress, but the teasing way your tongue is dipping out to trace the line of his tendon is making it hard for him to think.

“Are you gonna show me how you got that silly, little callsign of yours or not?” You give him one more squeeze, before bringing your hands up to the button of his white pants.

He knocks your hands out of the way before roughly grabbing your ass and hauls you firmly against him, “That feel little to you?”

Your gasp makes his fingertips dig further into your ass. The pretty color of your eyes has been completely eclipsed by your heavy, dark pupils. He can feel the way your thighs clench together.

“You want my attention? You’ve got it, baby,” he roughly rasps, “Go on then, show me how bad you can be.”

He dips his head down for a filthy, hungry kiss.

You push him back with a hand to his chest and a gleam in your eyes. You hold his heated gaze as you slowly undo his zipper and reach into his boxer briefs to pull him out. He moans when your thumb sweeps over the top of his cock.

Rooster thinks for a second that you’re going to drop to your knees for him, the mental image of you looking up at him with those doe-eyes is enough to make his jaw clench with desire. Especially with the way your sundress is gaping open at the top, giving him a clear view of the swells of your breasts.

Instead, you surprise him by bending over that glossy table and shimmying the skirt of your dress up over your luscious hips.

“Holy shit.”

You’re wearing the smallest, laciest little thong he’s ever fucking seen.

The band is a series of crisscrossed straps attached to some intricate and dainty floral lace. The juxtaposition of it against your skin is enough to make his ears ring. He’ll be dreaming of the way you’re enticingly arching your ass towards him for months.

And he’ll sure as shit never be able to be in a Ready Room again without getting a hard-on. The memory of you bent over the table before him will forever be ingrained in his brain.

“Is this bad enough for you, Lieutenant Commander?” You shoot him a grin over your shoulder as you wiggle your hips invitingly.

That sultry smile is swiped from your face the moment his large hand connects with your perfect ass. The sound echoes throughout the small room. He palms you once more before he yanks down your barely-there thong.

“Gonna fuck that attitude right out of you.”

Giving himself a few rough pumps, he lines himself up and slides into you with one steady thrust.

You both release an unrestrained groan of the sensation of him filling your warm, wet cunt. He barely gives you a moment to adjust to the size of him before he starts moving.

“’s big,” you sigh shakily.

“Tell me how much you like this cock.”

He slaps your pert ass again when you release a breathy whimper instead of answering him.

“Feels good, Rooster.” Your hands are struggling to find a way to support yourself as he fucks into you. “You feel so good.”

He pushes your dress higher up your body, his eyes are greedy for more of your skin. What he wouldn’t give to have you entirely naked and spread out before him. He wants to see all of you, he wants to hear you loud and needy for him.

“You’re so fucking pretty,” he murmurs as he watches himself smoothly gliding in and out of you.

The little noises you are making are driving him crazy. He knows you’re trying to muffle your sweet moans and sighs and whines. The sound of your bodies coming together fills the room.

How his cap is still perched on your head he doesn’t know, it jostles every time your bodies come together.

“I need more,” you beg, “Need you to touch me.”

“Ask me nicely.” He punctuates the demand with a sharp snap of his hips.

“Please, Bradley. Please.”

He slides his hand around to the front of you, his fingers drawn to your clit like a magnet. You keen at the contact and tilt your hips into his hand. The sound is music to his ears, “That’s more like it.”

He doesn’t think there’s anything else better on the planet than being buried in your perfect pussy. You’re so wet for him. He already knows he’s going to need more of this, more of you.

“You’re taking me so well,” Bradley grunts as he speeds up his thrusts, “Looks like all you needed was a nice, thick cock. Just a sweet thing now, aren’t you?”

“Oh my god,” you gasp as you writhe against him. “F-fuck.”

He is so turned on by the way his hands span across you as he grips your waist and pulls you against him with every roll of his hips. His heart is racing in his chest.

The feeling of your body tensing around him is paradise. There is nothing he wants more than to be able to draw this out, but he is all too aware of how quickly time is slipping away from him.

He sets a rough and unrelenting pace. Redoubling his efforts on your clit, his indulgent strokes turn into tight, purposeful circles. And you cry out at the change of sensation on that sensitive part of you.

Your thighs start to tremble as his cock drags against that spot deep inside of you. The heat is pooling in his lower back as he fucks into you over and over again.

“Rooster, I’m gonna-”

“I know, baby. Let me feel it,” he murmurs hotly against your ear, his thumb rubbing back and forth across your clit. “Come on my cock like a good girl.”

The goosebumps erupt across your body like fireworks a moment before he feels you shiver and tremble beneath him as you come with a choked sob. The way you spasm and clench around him is dizzying.

Bradley is teetering on the edge, your cunt felt like heaven. Warm and wet and gripping him just right. He almost doesn’t want to give himself up to it as the pressure at the base of his spine intensified. He doesn’t want to stop fucking you.

You’re so perfect for him.

He loses himself to the feeling of your pussy milking him as you continue to pulse and writhe in the aftershocks of your orgasm. He grips your hips harder as he pounds into you before emptying himself inside of you with a shattered groan.

And for a moment all he can hear is the blood rushing in his ears as he works to catch his breath. Rooster feels like his knees might buckle as the soft whimper you make when he pulls out of you.

He gently pulls that lacy little thong back up and helps to pull your dress back down over your hips and thighs before turning you around and lifting you onto the custom table.

He doesn’t know how he is going to make it through the rest of the journey knowing his come is collecting in your panties.

You’re flushed and looking thoroughly well-fucked as you smile up at him brightly.

Bradley threads his finger under the chain of your little gold heart-shaped locket that was etched with a rose in full bloom, and lightly tugs you in closer for a lingering kiss.

“I see you found your gift early, baby.”

Bradley would never forget the first time he saw you that night at the bar downtown last year during Fleet Week.

He had noticed you right away, it had been impossible not to. You and your girlfriends had been all done up in hot pink outfits for the Bachelorette party you were out celebrating.

Your friend had flounced right up to Jake taking the shot of whiskey out of his hand before swallowing it down then cheekily offering to buy him a replacement. Hangman had been wrapped around her finger ever since.

While your friends had all but shoved you in his direction while he had looked on entirely entertained as you had shot a scathing glare back at them. A sparkling tiara that read Bridesmaid sat crookedly on your head.

And then you had greeted him with a “Hey, Sailor” so weak that the couldn’t help but let out an amused laugh. There was a split second where he thought that he might have fucked it up before it could even start, but then you smiled back at him.

It was a charmingly self-deprecating smile and he was yours from the moment he saw it.

“Hiding it in your nightstand next to the batteries wasn’t the most original of spots, Rooster,” you affectionately tease him. “I didn’t mean to peek, but the remote stopped working. I hope you’re not mad. I love it.”

He could never be mad at you, especially not with his necklace around your neck. You were his, and he was so gone for you.

“It looks so pretty on you,” he tells you softly as his fingers brush over your collarbones.

“Oh my god, Rooster, I can’t we defiled Naval property.” You giggle as you wrap your legs around him to pull him closer to circle your arms around his neck.

“I hate to break it to you, but you’ve been defiling Naval property ever since you brought me home with you the night we met.”

You take that cap off of your head and set it back on his, and lean in to kiss him on the cheek, “Glad I’m getting a good return on my taxes then.”

He snorts a laugh, “God, I’ve missed you, baby. What are doing here? I thought you weren’t coming until the end of the week.”

“And miss the visual and culinary offerings of the USS Portland? I wouldn’t dream of it.” You joke as you run your hands along his arms where they’re pressed on the table on either side of you. “This uniform drives me just as crazy as it did last year.”

“Just the uniform?” he asks as he nudges his nose against yours.

“Maybe it has a little something to do with the man in the uniform,” you make a little hum as you check him out. “You’re so tan, Bradley, have you been using the sunscreen I sent with you-”

He crushes his mouth to yours, you were undoubtedly best thing that’s ever happened to him during Fleet Week.

“I’m glad I still do it for you,” he murmurs against your mouth before giving you another deep kiss.

The two of you work quickly to get yourselves looking presentable again. He’s only got a little time left before he is due to return to his tour duties back on deck.

He helps you back up the ladder and takes that left turn when he’s supposed to this time. All while your hand is tucked securely in his.

When you’re both back on the open flight deck he walks you over to the railing along the edge of the ship and wraps you up in his arms to watch the coastline crawl by with his last few moments of freedom.

“I really love Fleet Week,” you say with a contented sigh, as you lean your head back against his shoulder.

The golden rays from the sun are hitting you in a way that makes his chest warm.

“I do too, baby. It’s the best.”

Yeah, Rooster fucking loves Fleet Week.

Who doesn’t love a man in Summer Whites?! Consider this my formal petition for more Dress Whites in TG3!

Thank you for reading!

Update! If you want to learn about the night they met, I wrote these two a little prequel series you can read here!

Hey, Sailor Moodboard

A peek inside the USS Portland One | Two

If you’re curious, here is some info on the crest I found! One | Two | Three

You can check out my other stories and series here!

Taglist:

@gretagerwigsmuse @sehnsuchts-trunken @notroosterbradshaw @tongue-like-a-razor @laracrofted @bradshawsbitch @starryeyedstories @top-hhun-main @itscheybaby @prettylittlelauraa @startrekfangirl2233 @marantha @callsign-viper @teacupsandtopgun @itsizzythebell @shanimallina87 @angelbabyange @boltgirl426 @oneelleandaneye @mizzzpink @cornishkat @torres-espana @uzumegui @dont-talk-me-down @fandomunite2107 @alana4610 @20th-centu-fairy-girl @pariahsparadise @pono-pura-vida @donttouchmycarrots @nina-sj @eg-dr3amer3 @whaledots-blog @a-beaverhausen @misty-inferno @angellwingsss @hangmanscoming @mandolin22 @theweekndhistorybook @lilpeekabooze @high-bi-imgonnacry @ahintofkiwistrawberry @mrsdaamneron @ruewrote @spiderman-stilinski @jayniebop @melllinaa @my-soulmate-is-mycroft @mandolin22 @imaginecrushes

#bradley bradshaw x reader #bradley bradshaw imagine #bradley bradshaw x you #bradley bradshaw x female reader #top gun maverick fanfiction #top gun fanfiction #top gun imagine #top gun maverick imagine #bradley rooster bradshaw x reader #bradley rooster bradshaw x you #bradley rooster bradshaw x female reader #bradley rooster bradshaw fanfiction #bradley bradshaw fanfiction #rooster x reader #rooster x you #rooster x female reader

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drchucktingle · 8 months ago

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TICKETS LINKS ARE HERE: https://us.macmillan.com/tours/chuck-tingle-bury-your-gays/

YES BUCKAROOS the time has come for you to trot with me live and in person on the BURY YOUR GAYS BOOK TOUR. ask anyone who has previously trotted, this is not your average book tour these are SHOWS so come ready to get RILED.

on camp damascus tour most book stores did not have enough room and we had to turn many buckaroos away, so this time many of these shows are in off-site theaters. HOPEFULLY there will be enough room in larger venues but i will say it again for the buckaroos in the back, IF YOU ARE THINKING ABOUT COMING TO SEE YOUR BUD CHUCK THEN GET TICKETS NOW because last time most of them sold out. ALSO almost all dates on this tour give you a free copy of BURY YOUR GAYS with ticket purchase.

as of posting this there are three dates that do not have ticket links yet: los angeles, bozeman, and new orleans, but check back for when those trot online. EVERYTHING ELSE IS AVAILABLE NOW

more details for you buckaroos:

JULY 8TH - NEW YORK, NY at STRAND BOOKSTORE

JULY 10TH - BROOKLINE, MA with BROOKLINE BOOKSMITH at COOLIDGE CORNER THEATRE

JULY 12TH - ST. LOUIS, MO with LEFT BANK BOOKS at THE HEAVY ANCHOR

JULY 13TH - DOYLESTOWN, PA at THE DOYLESTOWN BOOKSHOP

JULY 15TH - NASHVILLE, TN with PARNASSUS BOOKS at THE NASHVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY

JULY 16 OR 17TH - NEW ORLEANS, LA with TUBBY & COOS. more info to come

JULY 19TH - SALT LAKE CITY, UT with UNDER THE UMBRELLA BOOKSTORE at UTAH MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART

JULY 20TH - BOZEMAN, MT at COUNTRY BOOKSHELF

JULY 31ST - SEATTLE, WA at THRID PLACE BOOKS (LAKE FOREST PARK)

AUGUST 2ND - PORTLAND, OR with ALWAYS HERE BOOKSTORE and guest buckaroo TJ KLUNE at CLINTON STREET THEATER

AUGUST 4TH - LOS ANGELES, CA with NORTH FIGUEROA BOOKSHOP at DYNASTY TYPEWRITER

#bury your gays #book tour #chuck tingle #tingleverse #buckaroo lifestyle

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flemingsfreckles · 8 months ago

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Replacement Part 3

Read the other parts here

Warnings: PLEASE TAKE THESE SERIOUSLY homophobia, parental abuse (emotional, mental, and physical), internalized homophobia, language

WC: 3.5k

A/N: alright so this sorta took and added extra turn to it, on top of the enemies to lovers, we’re now going to be working through some internalized homophobia stuff too,

“Ladies, this weekend, after training Thursday I want you all to go do something for team bonding, goalkeepers together, midfielders together, defenders, you all get the idea, try to make small groups, 3-4 players and pick an activity. We want you to get comfortable with the people who will be your support system on the field, we’ll do more full team bonding later. Starting small.” You usually didn’t mind team bonding, it was always a fun time, getting to hang out with your friends.

“You’re coming in my group!” Coffey grabs the back of your training top as you both walk away from the huddle.

“Yeah, cool.” You were more than happy to let someone else organize the groups and the plans, that was never really your forte.

“Me, you, Hina, and then Fleming too.” You give Sam a look that must’ve expressed your frustration with her adding Jessie. “You can handle an afternoon with her, you need to remember your teammates.” You bite your tongue before anything rude comes out of your mouth, you were doing your best to keep it civil with Jessie, Sam was right, she was your teammate at the end of the day.

You and Jessie hadn’t spoken since you lashed out at her on the field, but that didn’t mean the girl had given up on being your friend. The Monday back after game day you had walked in early to a mostly empty locker room, a few teammates here and there. You noticed Jessie’s bag already in her cubby, her clothes already changed. You then noticed the muffin sitting on the top shelf of your cubby. You had rolled your eyes at the sight of it, knowing who brought it. When she came back into the room and you muttered a quiet thank you to her, she gave you a tight lipped smile and a small nod before turning her attention away from you again. The two of you remained in silence for the next week, not exchanging compliments or critiques. You only spoke when necessary for drills or in training. Jessie stopped her typical pleasantries to you when she’d arrive to training every day, instead a small hello with no follow up was how she greeted you.

Thursday comes unfortunately fast for you. You really didn’t have a huge desire to do things after training normally and now you had to do something with Jessie.

Sam made you and Hina send her your favorite parts of the city, you were responsible for picking a coffee shop, Hina picked lunch, and Sam was responsible for dinner. She had said today would be a good day to give Jessie a less formal, more fun tour of Portland.

You all met up at the coffee shop you had picked. Jessie showed up smiling, camera slung across her chest. She had on a hat, her hair was down, she was wearing a simple white shirt and black pants. You find yourself admiring her, simple and yet somehow good looking, clothing choice before quickly shaking the feeling off. Much to your surprise she immediately came over to you asking about the coffee shop what was good, asking how you found it, how long you’d been going to it. It was if she had forgotten the scuffle between you and the fact that you both had been avoiding each other all week. You however, hadn’t forgotten, so you gave her short answers, letting her know anything was good, you hadn’t had a bad coffee yet, but pretty much ignored all her other questions.

“Hey, can we talk really quick?” Jessie poked you in the shoulder as the two of you stood, coffee in hand, waiting for Sam and Hina who had both ordered sandwiches with their coffee.

“Sure.” You weren’t in the mood to talk but you were going to have to with it just being the four of you.

“I don’t know what the issue is or was between us, can we pretend it doesn’t exist, I don’t know, at least for today? I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable.”

“Yeah, it’s fine, I just was having a bad day that day, sorry, I didn’t mean for it to carry over this whole time.” You half ass apologize, all while lying to her face. You hadn’t just been having a bad day, she was the cause of all your bad days so far. If you hadn’t meant for it to carry over all week you would’ve apologized days ago. But to keep the day going smooth, you made up the story, to make her feel better, to help you both move on.

Once you’d all grabbed coffee you walked around, Sam had named herself the tour guide and proceeded to walk you all over town to see various things. She would point out stores she liked, the best place for pizza, all hoping to give Jessie a better lay of the land. Jessie seemed to enjoy herself, you watched her look around in awe at the city you’ve come to call home. She had such a sense of wonder to her, looking at all the buildings, stopping to read the plaques with historical information. She also was constantly stopping for a step or two to take a photo. On a few occasions you caught her taking photos of the three of you walking.

When you look at her and she realized you’ve caught her she smiles. “Sorry, I just like capturing what going on around me, the people around me. I can delete them if you don’t want to be in photos.”

“Oh, no that’s fine, I don’t mind.”

“Cool,” Jessie gives you a smile before pointing ahead where Sam and Hina were standing up the street, both turned back waiting for you. “We should probably catch up.”

“Right.” You head up to where the other girls were, you couldn’t help but wonder about the photos Jessie took, you wanted to see them, but you didn’t want to ask.

Sam had stopped with Hina in front of a bar. “My first date in Portland was here, cute place, terrible date!” Turns out it was a popular first date street as Hina points out the first date she went to in Portland was just across the street.

“I guess we’ll have to wait and see where Fleming gets dragged to on her first date in the city. Where was your first date in Portland?” Sam turns her attention to you. You should’ve changed the subject before she had the chance to ask you.

“Um.” Nowhere is the correct answer, you hadn’t dated, you had no interest in dating the men in Portland or anywhere, so you didn’t. You kept to yourself, you were also still learning life after college, life in a new city, you had every excuse not to try dating. “I haven’t been on an official date since moving here, just too busy with moving, new city, training, all those things.”

Sam gives you a strange look, you’re not sure why, she knew you hadn’t been on dates. The two of you talked about her love life all the time, you figured she knew you hadn’t seen anyone.

“Yeah I wouldn’t expect any date stories from me anytime soon, I’m probably going to make sure I get settled first before I try seeing anyone, plus dating is exhausting.” Jessie quickly speaks up, you’re not sure if it’s intentional but it takes away from the awkward realization that in the year and a half you’ve lived in Portland you’ve never been on a date. Sam and Jessie fall into a debate over if dating is fun or exhausting and you’re happy to slip back into your own thoughts, not having to think about dating, relationships, or anything of the matter.

The day wasn’t nearly as bad as you had thought it was going to be. It was different, not being in a competitive environment had you looking at Jessie differently. She even made you laugh at lunch a few times. She was wittier than you expected for how quiet she tended to be. As you toured around you constantly found her walking next to you, letting Sam and Hina walk together. She’d point things out to you that she found pretty. When she’d stop to take a photo, you’d find yourself waiting for her while the other two walked on. It was weird, you felt less hostile towards the girl.

Jessie had stopped again, pointing out across the way to a bridge. You looked at the bridge and then watched Jessie take a couple of steps, bending down and then standing back up, trying to figure out where to take a photo from. She was calculated about it, just as she was with playing. For a minute you watch as she brings her camera to her eye before snapping a photo. You watch as she looks down at the screen with a smile, proud of whatever photo she took and for a split second you’re filled with a feeling of warmth, a small tingle in your stomach, stronger than the feeling you would get when she’d hand you a coffee or when you’d see the muffin she’d brought you. You physically shake off the feeling, you weren’t feeling that for anyone, especially not a girl, and especially not Jessie. You hated her.

The rest of the afternoon goes by, you don’t participate much in conversation, at dinner, letting the other three carry on. You’re too focused on that single moment, the moment you forgot you hated her and instead you felt something else. You felt a feeling you hadn’t had in years, a feeling you couldn’t have, you had promised yourself that.

No boys would get in your way of your career, no relationship would be manageable, your parents made sure of that from a young age. There would be no distractions, you didn’t have the time for a boyfriend, husband, anything it wasn’t an option, never had been. You had always been focused on school or training, never enough hours in the day for anything besides those two. Your parents pushed you to what felt like every minute of every single day, even as a kid. Doing extra school, extra weight training, extra running. You hardly had friends, having only one or two good friends your whole childhood outside of your teammates, you had no other hobbies, you played soccer and went to school. There was no time for a boyfriend.

A girlfriend certainly wasn’t an option, not even a thought, but that wasn’t a problem, you weren’t gay. You had been subtly taught your whole life that men date women and women date men, those were the options, anything else was unacceptable. You had been called gay, lesbian, and a variety of slurs, kids would tease you when you were younger, you preferred sports, you dressed in shorts and basic t shirts, you weren’t a girly girl, so you were teased, assumed to be gay. Then in high school people made fun of your close relationship with your former best friend, Grace, claiming the two of you must be dating. Those rumors made their way around until almost everyone was asking if you were with her, but you weren’t gay. You weren’t and you couldn’t be, your parents made sure you knew that.

They had temporarily kicked you out of the house when you were 16 after finding what they called “love notes” between you and your best friend. They kicked you out only after ripping apart your bedroom while you were at school, searching for evidence that you were seeing Grace. They didn’t find anything beyond the letters. You hadn’t even viewed them as love notes, just letters you had written to her and she had written to you. They were notes mentioning your appreciation for her and her friendship, telling her how much you enjoyed your time together, how she made you feel safe. There were mentions of “I love you” but purely platonic, nothing romantic in your eyes. Your parents didn’t see it that way and you could still feel the sting on your cheek from your mother’s hand that she had laid on you as you tried to pack and leave all while you argued there was nothing romantic with Grace.

Nothing romantic, until when you showed up at her family’s house crying, unable to get the words out to explain what was happening and she had taken you in. Once you finally calmed down and had explained what was going on she held you tight, her arms wrapped safely around you. She held you and rubbed your back. Grace simply let you exist in her presence, no expectations, no explanations. You didn’t tell her why your cheek was bright red, but you think she figured it out herself. When you pulled back from her grasp she reached to wipe your tears, the way you flinched away told Grace everything she needed to know about the marking on your cheek. She waited before slowly bringing her thumbs up to wipe your tears before holding your face and staring at you with such intensity it made your stomach turn. She told you she loved you, to this day you weren’t sure if she’d meant it romantically or not, and before you could register your own actions you had moved in and kissed her. She kissed you back for a moment before you both pulled away, never mentioning it again. The two of you never got the chance to discuss or even acknowledge the kiss you shared.

Your parents had dragged you back into their house the next day later after learning you had gone to Grace’s house. They welcomed you back into their home only to force you to sit through hateful speeches and lectures about how you’re made to be a wife to a man and how it was disgusting to find another girl pretty. They told you you’d marry a boy and have plenty of his children, you’d raise them while he worked, you would be loyal to him, of service to him, the lectures went on and on, day after day. You we’re grateful though, they kept their hands off of you for the most of the time, instead subjecting you to emotional and mental abuse.

They no longer let you speak and see Grace. Out of fear and a new deep guilt for what had happened between the two of you, you didn’t attempt to reach out. Your parents didn’t know you kissed but you felt like they did, like they knew everything between the two of you. The two of you fell out of touch quickly, you hadn’t seen her since the night you kissed.

Your parents kept you on a strict schedule, baring all communication with anyone who wasn’t a teammate, coach, or school teacher. They made you dress more feminine, they limited what music you listened to, what movies and television you watched, essentially controlling every aspect of your young adult life. They even set you up on dates with boys whose parents they knew, explaining to you that one of them could be your husband. All those dates ended in gross, overly sloppy kisses on your parents doorstep that had you running to the bathroom for mouthwash. It was a miserable few years of your life, ones you prefer to pretend never existed.

When you received a full scholarship for soccer you left for school and never looked back. It wasn’t easy to cut off communication completely with your family, they knew where you were, where your games were held, where to find you, but after your freshman year, they stopped showing up unexpectedly and you finally found a sliver of peace. Despite no longer being in communication with them, those few years still weighed heavily on you. You still flinched slightly if someone made a quick movement toward your face, it had been noticed by Sam and Janine, both asking if you were okay, you lied of course stating it was nothing. Your parent’s words haunted you even more, continuing to impact the way you felt, acted, and existed on a daily basis.

So that’s how you knew to handle your feelings, write them off as something else. The reason you had kissed Grace was because you were too overwhelmed with the thought of being kicked out by your family, you didn’t love her, it was just irrational behavior. The feeling you just experienced towards Jessie wasn’t anything other than displaced emotions. You were just too overwhelmed with your dislike of her, it was starting to show up in different ways. The same displaced emotions that you had felt toward Grace, and again toward your college teammate a few years ago, and now towards Jessie. But you weren’t gay. It was just confusion, too much going on in your head.

“Hello?” You suddenly snap back into the conversation being held in front of you, Hina waving her hand in front of your face.

“Huh?” You had no idea how long you had been zoned out for, reliving the harsh moments of your teenage years. You were just hoping your face didn’t give away to the group that you were remembering some of your worst days.

“Are you okay?” She asks.

“Yeah sorry, just sort of zoned out I guess.” You don't miss the way Jessie sends you a concerned look across the table.

“We’re talking about Saturday's game, how do you think it’s going to go? Are you going to get your first goal of the season?” You know it’s casual conversation but you had no desire to talk about playing

“I’m sure it’ll be good.” Is all you say before putting a bite of pizza into your mouth.

“I’d put money on you scoring.” Hina says before she takes a bite from her own slice.

“That’s if I even play.” You mumble and a silence falls across the table, a blanket of uncomfortable tension falling between the four of you. “Sorry.” You mumble this time with the intention of the others hearing you. You notice the apologetic glance Jessie sends you across the table before you turn your attention back to your plate. The silence until everyone finishes eating, everyone using bites of food to avoid being the one to break the silence.

After dinner Sam and Hina both take off in the direction of their places, opposite of where you lived, leaving you to walk alone with Jessie.

She doesn’t say much on the walk, you’re not sure if she knew, if she knew you had resentment toward her, that deep down you hated her, that you wished she’d go back to Chelsea, leave to somewhere else. Or maybe she just felt the tension at dinner and didn’t know she was the problem.

“How much further is your place?” She asks when she stop walking in front of her own building.

“Just right there.” You point a couple blocks up to your apartment building.

“Do you want me to walk with you?” She offers, it was dark out, she probably just meant it out of kindness.

“I’ve been here longer than you, I don’t need an escort to my own place.” It wasn’t more than a 3 minute walk away, you didn’t need her help walking there.

“Right, sorry, just let me know you get in safe?”

“You’re not my parents Jessie, I don’t need to be watched, I’ll be fine.”

“I know I’m not, but sure like your parents I’d just like to know you made it home safe. I always ask my friends to let me know, I asked Hina and Sam to text me too!”

“Yeah, news flash, we’re not friends, you know nothing about my parents.” You spit out before turning quickly and walking in the direction of your place. You don’t look back, you’re not sure if Jessie went inside or watched you walk all the way. When you’re inside you don’t text her, part of you feels guilty for not, she was looking out for you, but you put your phone on the kitchen table and head straight into bed.

You were emotionally exhausted from the day, first with training, then with spending the afternoon chatting and socializing, and finally with the internal fight over what you were feeling for Jessie and what you had been told your whole life and on top of knowing she was your replacement, you can’t feel anything but hatred for her. When you lay your head down on your pillow you felt a tear run from the eye across the bridge of your nose and drop onto the pillow.

You felt scared and uneasy, having no idea how to process your emotions and having no one to turn to. So you laid in bed, awake staring at the ceiling in a pit of uncertainty, feeling so unsure of yourself, as a player and even more so as a person.

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