#Please if you know me irl completely forget you saw this post

[mxsternobody]

Starting to wonder if I should start writing spicy hcs for kintober and monstertober (as an avid monster fuqqer) instead of drawing because clearly I can’t keep up on my days.

LETS HOLD A MAJORITY VOTE!!! (If you know, ily)

[wongyuseokie]

Bake a Wish | c.s.c

Summary: Seungcheol knows it’s silly. Getting this mad that you forget his birthday, but it only happens once a year. He’s too prideful to let it go so quickly, and you’re too determined to continue letting your boyfriend sulk. 

☆ 18+ minors dni |☀︎fluff | ☁︎ angst | ♕ smut |  ♥ completed works

Word Count:  3651 words

Pairings: Choi Seungcheol x Female Reader 

Genre/Trope(s)/AUs: Fluff, Smut & Angst, Idol! AU, but like it’s not that important. It just sets the tone, I guess? Like why he stays in a dorm etc. 

Content Warnings: Smut, fluff, angst 

Smut Warnings: Unprotected sex (don’t do this irl), daddy kink, only for a few seconds tho, oral sex (f receiving), pussy fingering, overstimulation, cum licking (off fingers), ear biting (nibbling, it’s sexy), squirting. Nicknames, kitten because, at this point, it’s my favourite nickname to use. 

Authors Note: Thank you so much @here4kpopfics, @lovelyhan, @seokgyuu @sluttywoozi and @seungkwansphd, for hearing me go on and about this fic and helping me out 💕also tagging my lovely @duhnova because I know you yell about Cheol a lot 😗😗

Authors Note 2: Happy Birthday Cheol!! 🥳 here's a smutty little sorta plot-filled smut fic 💕💕 I posted it at 12 (Korea time) woo hoo.

© wongyuseokie 2023. All rights reserved.

“Cheol?”

No response. 

“Seungcheolie?” 

“Baby, I know I forgot. Work was just crazy and everything. I won’t make excuses. Please don’t be mad,” you pleaded, and your boyfriend sighed. 

“I’m not mad. You were the one who wanted to do something, so for you to forget,” Seungcheol trailed off, sighing as he ran his hand through his hair. 

“Forget it. I’m a grown man. I shouldn’t sulk over a birthday,” Seunghcheol said, defeated, as he started to get up from the couch. 

“Cheol, I just lost track of the days and forgot. I’m so sorry,” you apologised, getting up and going after him. 

“See, that’s what bothers me. You forgot. I’ve had friends forget, family forget, but you? I guess that puts things into perspective for me. I don’t know, maybe it’s my fault for putting you, my girlfriend, on a higher pedestal, but I thought you would remember,” Seungcheol spoke, each word breaking your heart even more. 

“I can make it up to you. Why don’t we do something this weekend?” You offered hurriedly, and Seungcheol shook his head. 

“I have plans with the guys and can’t back out. They initially wanted to celebrate on my actual birthday, but I told them that tonight, well, it would have just been for us,” Seungcheol explained with a sad smile. 

“But,” Seungcheol said, breaking the tension slightly. “You said there’d be an amazing chocolate cake waiting for me at home?” Seungcheol asked hopefully, only for it to shatter the second he saw your face fall. 

“Ah, right, you forgot,” Seungcheol deduced and shook his head. 

“Look, we can order something and get a bottle of wine, and I can spend all night showing you how sorry I am?” You offered, placing a hand on Seungcheol’s shoulder, making him look at you. 

“Sex isn’t going to fix this,” Seungcheol mumbled. 

“There’s nothing to fix. I just need to stop making birthdays such a big deal,” Seungcheol added, and you shook your head at his words. 

“No, Cheol,” you started to say, and he held up a hand to stop you.

“Look, you’ll say something, and then I’ll say something, and it’ll snowball. I don’t want to risk an argument, not on my birthday or with you,” Seungcheol said. He was tired, and he wanted to sleep. 

“Okay, yeah, you’re right. What if I draw you up a nice bubble bath, and we can just sleep? You can even hog all the blankets,” you added with a hopeful smile. 

“Actually. I was planning to sleep at the dorms tonight,” Seungcheol admitted. 

“Oh, but Cheol, since we’ve been together, we always spend birthdays together,” you protested, and Seungcheol shrugged. 

“Well, I guess tonight’s just full of firsts?” Seungcheol muttered. 

“I don’t want to lose you over this,” you admitted, and Seungcheol smiled softly at you. 

“You won’t, not over this. It’s not a fight. I’m just upset and want some space, but I don’t want to get into anything tonight because I know it’ll end in a fight, and I don’t want that,” Seungcheol clarified. 

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, and he shrugged. 

“We’ll be okay. I just need some space,” Seungcheol added, and you nodded. 

You had messed up so badly, and usually, when either of you messed up this bad, you’d argue and be fine in a few hours, but tonight was different. You hurt your boyfriend so badly that he was beyond the point of being angry, he was disappointed, and he felt defeated. 

“When can I see you?” You asked impatiently, and Seungcheol shrugged. 

“Let me be the one to reach out?” Seungcheol suggested, and you nodded slowly as you watched your heartbroken boyfriend put on his dress shoes and coat, things you told him to wear because you made a reservation at the best restaurant in town. Seungcheol got dressed up and excited for tonight, only for you to stand him up at the restaurant and forget his birthday together. 

As you watched your boyfriend dejectedly leave your apartment tonight, you had a plan, and you were determined. You’d do everything possible to ensure he never felt this shitty again and to redo tonight. No matter what, he’d still have a fantastic birthday this year. 

“Oof, she forgot?” Jeonghan asked Seungcheol when he saw his friend sulking about the dorm that evening. 

“Yeah. I mean, I wouldn’t care,” Seungcheol started to say, earning a scoff from Jeonghan. 

“You are the sulkiest in general, but more so about your birthday, but continue,” Jeonghan interrupted. 

“Anyways,” Seungcheol said with a glare. 

“She planned everything, told me to get ready and clear my schedule, and she doesn’t show up? Then she told me a cake was at home, which she had forgotten. I don’t know, and it felt like she forgot everything,” Seungcheol mumbled, pouting. 

“Here,” Jeonghan said as he handed Seungcheol a black box with a bow. 

“Jeonghan, I’m taken,” Seungcheol joked, making Jeonghan roll his eyes. 

“Shut up. It's a little something for your birthday, it won’t compare to what Y/N got you, but I hope you like it,” Jeonghan added, and Seungcheol’s face fell. 

“She forgot to get me a present,” Seungcheol muttered. 

“Maybe something else is going on in her life? Something that requires her full attention, and she just got overwhelmed?” Jeonghan offered. 

“But she didn’t tell me?” Seungcheol questioned. 

“You’re a busy man, and I’m sure it’s nothing she can’t handle and didn’t want to bother you,” Jeonghan suggested. 

“She’s my girlfriend. She couldn’t ever bother me,” Seungcheol said softly, and Jeonghan patted Seungcheol’s shoulder to comfort the sulking man. 

“We’re still on for tomorrow. We’re planning to go out and get shit-faced. You can invite Y/N if you want,” Jeonghan suggested. 

“No, I think space would do us good,” Seungcheol responded, and Jeonghan hesitated and decided not to respond. He knew that Seungcheol needed his time to be petty, and he just had to let him be angry. 

“Alright, well, do you want any of us to keep you company tonight?” Jeonghan asked, and Seungcheol shook his head. 

“Nah, I’ll see y’all tomorrow.”

You were tossing and turning in bed that night. Even when Seungcheol was on tour, you would always text each other good night. You hadn’t tonight; you wanted to give him his space, but you were worried that more space would result in more distance between you two, and that couldn’t happen. 

Worried, you grabbed your phone from your bedside table and called instead of texting. You couldn’t help it. You knew you weren’t being fair, he asked for space, but you couldn’t help yourself. 

Seungcheol picked up after four rings, and his sleepy voice immediately made you feel terrible for waking him up.

“Baby?” Seungcheol spoke sleepily, and you felt your heart swell and ache because of one word. You hurt him so badly, yet he was calling you baby here. 

“I’m sorry I woke you up,” you mumbled. 

“It’s okay. Did you need something?” Seungcheol asked. 

“I just wanted to say goodnight,” you admitted sheepishly, and Seungcheol sighed. 

“You couldn’t text it?” Seungcheol asked. 

“I’m sorry, I messed up. I shouldn’t have woken you up,” you apologised. 

“Well, you did wake me up, so why don’t you tell me what’s up?” Seungcheol asked. 

“I miss you,” you hated how pathetic you sounded. It was his birthday that you missed, and here you were being miserable, and he shouldn’t have to deal with it. You heard Seungcheol sigh softly. 

“I miss you too. Do you need me to come over, or will you be okay tonight?” Seungcheol asked and smiled sadly, even though you knew he couldn't see you. 

“No, I shouldn’t. You said you wanted space. I should give it to you,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol groaned softly. 

“So you just woke me up for no reason?” Seungcheol quipped. 

“Cheol,” you started to say, only to be interrupted. 

“I need sleep. The guys planned something for my birthday, so I want to be rested and fresh tomorrow,” Seungcheol remarked sassily, and you frowned even though he couldn’t see. 

Seungcheol felt terrible for being so snippy, but he was just tired and wanted space and sleep. 

“Goodnight, Cheol. I love you,” you mumbled into the call. You heard Seungcheol take a breath and then hum into the call before hanging up. 

Seungcheol knew it was a dick move on his part not to say I love you, he knew that it would mess with you and make you overthink, but he couldn’t take it back. He could only hope that you understood that it occurred due to a moment of frustration. 

You tried your hardest not to cry your eyes out after the phone call, Seungcheol sounded so defeated and tired, but you were determined not to wallow and make it about you. You would make up for all this, and it’d be okay. 

“Cheol, you ready?” Jeonghan asked later that morning as Seungcheol was checking his phone. You hadn’t texted or called, he understood that he asked for space, but he selfishly hoped for none. 

“Dude, no, no phones today. No wallowing,” Jeonghan scolded lightly as he took Seungcheol’s phone out of his hand. 

“What if she calls?” Seungcheol whined. 

“Then I’ll tell her that you’re happily celebrating and you don’t wish to be disturbed,” Jeonghan teased, earning a scowl from Seungcheol. 

“You will say no such thing to her. You will not upset her further,” Seungcheol warned, and Jeonghan sighed. 

“I wouldn’t. Just for 24 hours, can you forget this argument and have fun? We don’t like seeing you upset,” Jeonghan pleaded, his voice softer, and Seungcheol nodded. 

“Yeah. I can. Let's get drunk?” Seungcheol suggested with a weak smile, and Jeonghan nodded excitedly. 

“Yeah!”

You weren’t sure what exactly you were doing here. You weren’t even meant to know where Seungcheol’s birthday plans were, but Soonyoung couldn’t keep anything to himself and posted videos and pictures of Seungcheol’s celebration. Your heart thought quicker than your brain, and you were now in the restaurant's car park where Seungcheol was celebrating his birthday. 

You knew it was clingy and overbearing, and everything you were doing right now went against Seungcheol asking for space, but you couldn’t help it. The guilt was eating you alive, and you hated being the reason that Seungcheol was upset. 

You figured that if you showed up with a big cake and showed that you went through the trouble of getting the cake and finding out where he was, then he’d forgive you. Or at least stop sulking at you, and hear you out. 

You checked your phone one more time before getting out of the car, and you wished you hadn’t opened up Soonyoung’s Instagram story on his private account, and what you saw made your heart hurt and eyes water. Seungcheol was hanging around other girls, posing and hugging one of them. 

You knew Seungcheol was loyal, he’d never cheat, but it still hurt, watching him spend his birthday with other girls, and while you know you were at fault for this since you forgot his birthday. It almost felt like he was just rubbing it in your face. 

You heard a muffled voice and saw Seungcheol tapping on your car window. You turned to face him, smiling at him, your vision blurring vision as you smiled at him through your tears. You unlocked the door and motioned for him to get in. 

“Why are you here?” Seungcheol asked, and you frowned at his question, hoping he’d be happy to see you. Seungcheol noticed how your face fell, and he noticed your teary eyes, but he didn’t want to comment on it, at least not yet. 

“I just, uh,” you fumbled, looking away from him and at the backseat. 

“I wanted to give you that,” you mumbled, pointing to the cake in the backseat. 

“Is this the cake you promised?” Seungcheol asked hopefully with a smile. 

“Yeah, I’m sorry,” you apologised, as you kept your stare on the cake box in the backseat. 

“I think you’ve apologised enough,” Seungcheol said softly as he took your hand, making you look at him. 

“I’m sorry if I sounded rude earlier, but I’m genuinely wondering why you’re here, but I’m not upset to see you,” Seungcheol explained. 

“I wanted to bring the cake as a surprise. I know you said to give you space and that you’d reach out, but I guess I can’t, not when I know I upset you,” you rambled. 

“So why didn’t you come? You just started crying in the car?” Seungcheol asked. 

“I cried because of Soonyoung’s Instagram story,” you mumbled, feeling ashamed that all it got was a temporary wave of insecurity to make you cry, despite knowing how loyal Seungcheol was. 

“What was on it?” Seungcheol asked, and you meekly pulled out your phone and showed Seungcheol the story. 

“Wait, so you thought I was cheating?” Seungcheol accused, and you shook your head. 

“No, of course not. Seeing my boyfriend hugging another woman and celebrating his birthday with other girls does suck,” you spat. 

“Do you want this to be something we fight about?” Seungcheol asked, and you shook your head. 

“No, I don’t. I know you wouldn’t. I just was being silly,” you mumbled. 

“Your feelings are valid, don’t dismiss it, but I know that’s not what upset you,” Seungcheol said, holding your hand tighter, interlacing his fingers with yours. 

“I just wanted to be the one you celebrated your birthday with, Cheol, and I guess seeing you celebrate with other girls made an ugly green monster awaken in me,” you admitted. 

“That’s fair, but I promised the guys I would celebrate my birthday with them,” Seungcheol said. 

“What about tomorrow?” Seungcheol offered. 

“I’ll be done at the studio around 8. We can meet for dinner. It’ll have to be quick because I have a meeting at 10:30.” 

“You’re only free for like 2 hours?” You asked. 

“I was free for longer on my actual birthday,” Seungcheol retorted, making you frown. 

“Okay, 2 hours. I’ll make it the best 2 hours possible, okay?” You said, leaning over to place on Seungcheol’s cheek. 

Choi “Husband” Seungcheol [9:00 am]: Morning love, I’m heading to the studio now. I’ll give you a ring once I leave. Looking forward to seeing you tonight. 🥰🥰

You grinned as you saw Seungcheol’s message the following morning and smiled as you typed out a response. 

You [9:01 am]: See you later, handsome 🥰

You put your phone away. You had a lot to prepare tonight, you were a couple of days late, but you were determined to make this the best birthday ever. 

“Ow!” Seungcheol yelped when he felt another balled-up piece of paper hit his head. He wasn’t entirely sure why Jeonghan kept throwing scraps of paper at his head. 

“What is your problem?” Seungcheol asked. 

“We’ve been trying to get your attention for. I don’t know, ten minutes?” Jeonghan responded. 

“Oh.“ 

“I’ve just been distracted.”

“Yeah, no shit, can you just go and make it up with Y/N? You look like a sad husky,” Jeonghan muttered. 

“Husky because I’m so handsome?” Seungcheol asked with a grin. 

“No, husky, because you sulk and whine as much,” Jeonghan sassed, making Seungcheol glare at him. 

“Look, she forgot, yes, but shit happens. Do you want to whine and let this cause a problem in your relationship? No, you don’t. What about when you forgot she was allergic to lilies and got her a bouquet?” Jeonghan asked. 

“Oh god, my baby was sneezing all night long,” Seungcheol groaned, recalling the night he accidentally gave you flowers you were allergic to. 

“Exactly, look, she didn’t mean it, and I bet she’s overthinking and overplanning just to make things right, and more importantly, just because she forgot your birthday does not mean she doesn’t love you,” Jeonghan added. 

“I overreacted, didn’t I?” Seungcheol asked. 

“No, not that night, but dragging it out? That might be unnecessary,” Jeonghan clarified. 

“I’ll apologise tonight. I’ll see her tonight,” Seungcheol said, determined. 

“No, go now. We can pick this up tomorrow,” Jeonghan insisted. 

“Sure?” 

“Yes, and Cheol?” 

“Yes?”

“Use protection!” 

“Baby?” Seungcheol called out as he entered your apartment. As soon as he entered your apartment, he was greeted with the aroma of baked goods and saw the apartment decorated with balloons, candles and confetti. 

“Cheol?“ You exclaimed as you wandered out of the kitchen. 

“Baby!” Suengcheol greeted you as he ran to embrace you, and you giggled as he pulled you into a tight embrace. 

“You’re home so early. I’m not done preparing,” you whined. 

“I don’t care. I’ve been a big baby. What matters is that you love me, and I love you, not some birthday,” Seungcheol declared, making you giggle. 

“I love you, but Cheol, but the dinner won’t be ready for another couple of hours,” you whined. 

“It’s okay. I’m sorry for being such a baby,” Seungcheol apologised. 

“I’m sorry for forgetting,” you added. 

“We’re a pretty sorry couple, aren’t we?” Seungcheol joked, making you smile. 

“Come,” you said, pulling away from Seungcheol’s embrace slightly to take his hand in yours. 

“Where?”

“Bedroom, since dinner won’t be ready for some time, I figured I’ll give you one of your presents a little earlier,” you said with a teasing grin. 

“Lead the way, kitten.“ 

“Cheol!” You giggled as Seungcheol hoisted you up, causing you to wrap around his waist. Seungcheol wasted no time the second the bedroom door closed and pulled you into a passionate kiss, deepening the kiss by slipping his tongue into your mouth, making you moan as he started sucking on your bottom lip; his plush lips always worked wonders no matter what part of your body they were on.

“Can you strip for me, baby?” Seungcheol asked as he placed you down on the bed, and you nodded as you quickly peeled off your clothes and laid back on the bed, hissing softly as the cool sheets touched your naked form. 

“Baby, it’s meant to be about you,” you whined, making Seungcheol grin. 

“I’m meant to give you the present,” you mumbled. 

“You naked and dripping for me is enough of a present,” Seungcheol said, making you let out a soft moan.  “Then I’m all yours, Daddy,” you added.  

“No, Daddy, tonight, baby. Just Cheol, okay?” Seungcheol said as he climbed onto the bed and pulled you into his lap. 

“I’m sorry for being a big sulky baby, and while sex isn't the answer, it can’t hurt, but I promise I will, and I-” Seungcheol tried to apologise, and you shut him up with a kiss. 

“Cheol, please. Just fuck me,” you begged, rubbing your exposed cunt on his jeans, the friction making you moan. 

“Gladly,” Seungcheol complied, standing up to quickly rid himself of his clothing and positioning himself at your wet cunt.

He started by placing kisses along your calves and up to your thighs, never fully touching you. It felt different like he was going to take his time. He gently parted your legs, giving him access to your glistening cunt, placing your legs onto his toned back and wrapping his arms around your waist. 

Seungcheol placed soft kisses along your folds, his lips gently enveloping your clit. You let out a sigh of approval, tangling your fingers in his hair. He knew your body well, and his lips were a god's gift to your cunt.

He started sucking on your clit, while his tongue jutted out and started flicking the sensitive bundle of nerves. The grip you had in his hair tightened while he removed one arm from your waist and slipped two fingers inside you. Never once did he remove his lips from your clit as he kept fingering you at such a delicious speed. He was thorough yet delicate with his movements, he wanted you to feel complete and utter bliss. 

“Cheol, I’m close,” you moaned out, your words failing you as Seungcheol’s ministrations had you close to your first orgasm of the night. He said nothing. Instead just continued as you fell apart on his tongue, letting you ride your orgasm out against his face and fingers.

“Always so sweet for me, baby,” Seungcheol praised as he licked his fingers clean of your release. You moaned at the sight. You tried to get up in an attempt to take him into your mouth, but Seungcheol gently pushed you down. 

“Not tonight; I need to feel you,” he said softly.

Seungcheol laid down next to you, tilting you so that you were curled up into his chest. He pulled your leg to the side and pushed it back so that it wrapped around his muscular thighs, allowing him access to push inside you. He had one hand rubbing on your clit, and one on your nipple. He kept thrusting inside you, neither of his hands ceasing their actions. You moaned at the feeling. 

You suddenly stilled and fell apart around his cock. Seungcheol moaned and gently bit into your shoulder at the feeling of you clenching around him. He didn't stop; he continued pounding himself into you, picking up his pace as he was desperate to reach his release. He fell apart not long after he furiously rubbed at your clit, making you cum so hard that you shook violently against him. He gently pulled out of you, making you whimper at the empty feeling.

“It's been a while since I made you squirt,” Seungcheol said with a proud grin while you were still basking in the afterglow of your orgasm. 

“Hmm?” You moaned into his chest. 

“You squirted, baby, all over my cock,” he whispered, gently nibbling your ear, making you giggle as you into his toned chest. 

“Cheol?” 

“Hm?” 

“Happy Birthday, my love.” 

[moonrisecoeur]

compliance (how to brainwash your boyfriend) — leon kennedy

author’s note: this was written with re4r!leon in mind bc that’s my boyfriend! angel said so!! i have… so many hypno ideas, some considerably more palatable and some that are Much Worse, so pls let me know if you want more! also this is based off of an audio i listened to once by everdistant-utopia on reddit! the headset concept is kind of (extremely) goofy but i was into it idk. again, i'm aware that mind control isn't real and this is a silly ass concept. i had fun doing it anyway. no leons were hurt in the making of this fic. sorry for not posting it sooner even tho it was done i was extremely embarrassed lol. pls ignore any typos. love you!! thank u!!

wc: 5k

content: sub!leon x fem!reader, afab reader, oral reader receiving, orgasm control, mention of feet for like two seconds

warning: this is dark content. please do not read if the following topics are sensitive to you: noncon, hypnosis, mind control. i dont endorse or encourage this type of behavior irl, its just a fantasy!

—

as you walk down the street, you walk by a flier that’s sitting on the sidewalk. you don’t stop to read it, but one word caught your eye. mind control. it was probably something stupid, something completely made up by some lunatic who thinks mind control is real. mind control is maybe, technically real, in the ‘just relax and close your eyes, breathe deeply and let yourself be at peace’ kind of way. definitely not the ‘put on this headset and let me rewire your brain to make you my pet’ kind of way.

but… would it really hurt to look at the flier? you turn around to see it’s still there, and, against all your better judgment, you decide to walk up to it and pick it up.

it’s dirty, wet because of the rain from last night. even still, you can read the description of the advertised product clearly, along with some more info like a website and contact info for the designers. you take a brief moment to wonder who in the hell comes up with that stuff.

introducing you to the ultra brainwasher headset 3000! perfect for all of your mind control needs! simply place the device over the subjected head and choose what you’d like to do with them. need an obedient housewife? in search of a new pet? want them to be madly in love and obsessed with you? all of that and more is possible with the ultra brainwasher headset 3000! visit our website and order the headset today!

you blink. this is insane. who would do this? who would make this? why would anyone want to make someone do any of this against their will? you feel sick to your stomach as you crumple up the flier and toss it in the nearest trash can.

because that’s… that’s not consensual. that’s wrong in every possible way. unless they gave consent to be, what, turned into an ‘obedient housewife’? that’s really what it said? there’s just no way that’s right. how is that legal to sell? what even was that flier doing?

this feels like the kind of thing that would be sold on the black market, not openly advertised to people on the street. what if some lunatic saw it and just started brainwashing people? no one could stop them, it’s not exactly a crime in and of itself, and any crimes committed would be a little difficult to report if the ‘subject’ was too mindless to notice or to say anything.

whatever. you threw the flier away, you did your job as a good samaritan by tossing it so someone much much worse than you wouldn’t get a chance to look at it, and thus, you can forget all about the headset. pretend you never saw the flier or knew it existed and carry on with your life.

except, you can’t really. it permeates your thoughts, seeps inside of your subconscious until you begin to hypothesize that the headset wasn’t the real hypnosis, it was seeing that flier. you know you must be delusional. it’s not real, you’re not really mind controlled from just reading the flier, but… would it really hurt it buy it? you had the money for it and it’s not too expensive at all.

you hate yourself for it but you look on the website, just as hypnotic as the flier was, and you see multiple variations of the headset. some more suited towards different outcomes for ‘subjects’ and some just different stylistically.

you find the one you were looking at earlier. the ultra brainwasher 3000. it’s a stupid name, you’re aware. it just doesn’t really matter because who’s gonna know that you own this? you’ll keep it, maybe try it out on yourself to see what it’s like. you won’t do anything crazy, maybe like, hypnotize yourself to not be able to sit down until all your household chores are done, just for the day. the ultra brainwasher 3000 claims to have this functionality, and you’re… more or less, curious.

you order it and spend two weeks in absolute hell, making sure your boyfriend is never home alone when the package could arrive. you’re not worried he’d open it and see the device. he doesn’t look through your stuff, but the packing sticker ‘brainmelting industrial company’ would…. catch his eye for sure. try explaining that to your boyfriend, especially because even if you’re a good liar, you’re not to leon.

but, you get it, and it’s perfect because leon isn’t home right now, and you get to play with your new toy for a little bit. the box is smaller than you expected, only including the headset, a charging cord, and a set of instructions.

as you’re reading, the thought only just now hits you. it’s surprising that it’s taken you this long to have this idea, given how it would be someone else’s first instinct.

“should i…” you murmur to yourself, looking around nervously to see if anyone is in earshot, “… should i use this on leon..?”

i don’t know, should you use a mind control headset on your poor boyfriend that was just sent on a mission to save the fucking president’s daughter? maybe not.

you don’t know how it took you this long to come up with the concept. i mean, the flier did mention making someone your obedient housewife, but… they never said that someone had to be a girl…

it’s gross or actually more disgusting, honestly, how excited you get at the prospect of doing this to leon, but you decide that yeah, fuck it, you might as well brainwash your boyfriend. truthfully, what are the consequences? besides… ruining your relationship, betraying his trust, destroying him as a person… eh, it’s only temporary, right? there’s ways to make it only temporary.. and there’s no way he’d remember..

you fiddle with it, curious of all the different things you could do to him. the headset didn’t have presets, you could make up literally anything you wanted him to believe. you could make him the obedient housewife, but you could also make him a servant, maybe even dress him up all pretty as a maid. you could make sure of his loyalty and commitment, make him be so in love with you that even the thought of being with another woman makes him physically ill.

he gets home later that night, worn down and tired and exhausted in every possible way. and you know you’re going to have to put on your best acting skills. you’re not sure if you’re ready to do this, but you’re gonna have to be, so you press a sweet kiss to his lips, one he lingers on for just a moment too long. his lips chase after yours as his eyes open back up slowly, looking at you through his pretty lashes, an eyebrow raised, “what?”

you can’t help but adore him, his bluntness and gruff attitude, yet how soft he touches your waist as he pulls you closer. leon is nothing if not gentle and sweet, and you love that about him, “nothing, i just… i just wanted to look at you,” you say, and it reminds you just how easy leon is. just a couple of words and his eyes get a little glassy, his heart leaping out of his chest just a bit.

it sometimes helps that your boyfriend has been through every form of hell since that day in raccoon city, so sometimes just sweet words and little gestures get a bigger reaction than you’d expect. he’s traumatized and broken down, so the love you give him matters so much more.

in short, he’s easy. he gives in quickly and doesn’t like to fight, not with you. gives you everything you want, doesn’t protest, doesn’t ask for much besides your attention and love.

“you always stare at me,” he says awkwardly. god he’s so not charming that it makes him effortlessly likable.

that’s what’s so sucky about the idea of hypnosis. do you lose the person he used to be? sure, a mindless househusband would be great, helplessly obedient and passive and hardworking, but does this override his actual personality? that’s a bit too scary.

you make an effort to soak in these parts of his personality, enjoying every inch of his pretty little mind. you decide that no matter what you do to him, you can’t ruin him completely. you’d miss his heart, rough and guarded but nonetheless yours.

“i wanna try something,” you murmur to him, your heart pounding a little more than it should, “do you trust me?”

“of course i do,” he says. your heart almost aches, he trusts you so implicitly.

“close your eyes,” you say, and he complies easily.

you step away to grab the headset, and he’s so sweet and good that he doesn’t even peek. you take a deep breath, and commit to it.

you place it on his head, and he grumbles, but doesn’t object. poor thing. doesn’t even realize what’s happening to him.

—

the setting on the headset that you chose wasn’t anything flashy but it was labeled ‘semi-permanent’ and it stated that the subject would not remember anything from the moment of hypnosis to the moment they wake up next. so, all and all, even if you felt horrible, the damage wouldn’t be permanent, and leon wouldn’t even remember what happened.

truthfully, it felt like nothing could go wrong. it wouldn’t alter him too much, just… make him helplessly obedient for a couple hours. you could turn up the intensity if you wanted to, if it wasn’t quite enough to satisfy your curiosity.

you decide that it’s now or never, especially since being lost in your head while your boyfriend is cluelessly wearing what looks like a vr headset is kind of… odd.

you start the application, waiting for it to begin on his end.

“what are you up to?” he asks innocently, probably still not seeing anything while it loads. the question sounds like an accusation, but it’s really not. leon genuinely just wants to know what’s going on. it’s hard not to, but you don’t answer.

you notice the exact moment that it starts because grunts out of nowhere and his whole body tenses, and he clutches onto the fabric of the couch cushions, using that sense as a way to ground himself during an overload of audio and visual stimulation.

you reach to grab his hand, and his grasps yours tightly, desperately, as if physically pleading with you to make it stop.

you whisper to him, “shhh, nice and easy,” you’re not even sure if he can hear you, but you still feel the need to speak. you’re not sure if it’s your voice or your touch but he relaxes just slightly, his breath raggedy and tense. he’s trying like hell to keep himself together, but it’s so overwhelming that it’s hard for him to think, “hey… it’s okay. you’re okay, just… let it happen.”

a pathetic little whimper escapes his throat as his body goes slack, jaw hanging open and arms hanging limply by his sides, “wha… why?” his voice sounds small, weak, and if you weren’t so cruel, you’d immediately take it all back and apologize and just face the consequences.

but you’re too far deep to back out now, even if leon’s pitiful demeanor is almost swaying you to stop, you know you can’t. not now.

“i… i thought you…” he whines, body tensing and spasming as he tries to put some form of coherent thought together, “wha… why..?” he whimpers again, pathetically broken down in just a matter of minutes.

you sit there with him, holding his hand, waiting for the process to be done, and once it is, you take the headset off.

he seems agitated, but doesn’t seem to know what at. his muscles are tense, but he doesn’t make any sudden movements.

“hey,” you mutter gently, and he almost flinches at the sound, looking at you with those wide deer eyes again, scared. you reach out to touch his face, fingers caressing his cheek.

the cogs in his brain turn as he processes what’s happening, and the agitation seems to evaporate and become replaced by a sense of calm and relaxation. he looks into your eyes, and it seems like he’s deciding something.

“leon?”

“yes? how… can i serve you?” he asks, jaw dropping at his own words. he’s so stunned at what he’s saying and how he’s acting yet he can’t help it.

“…address me as… ma’am,” you say, and he shivers, eyes closing tensely as he tries to figure out what the hell is going on, “and go get me something. how about… a cup of coffee? yeah, let’s start there.”

it makes sense that he’s fading in and out, the programming would probably need more time to settle in before it was done and his personality obviously wouldn’t just disappear, but it was still a little bit heartbreaking to watch him fight the voice in his head that is desperate to obey you.

as he disappears into the kitchen, you sit where he was sitting on the couch to take a moment to think it all over.

leon has never been the most… dominant man. he has his moments of aggression and tension that turn into a roughness that his soul seems to often carry, but it’s never controlling. he’s not demanding, he asks nothing of you besides gracing him with your presence.

but due to his past, submission also doesn’t come easy to him. he likes to think he would lean more sub, just because he’s so malleable to your will, so easy to convince. anything you want is yours, and if you want his dignity laid out in the palm of your hand, then it’s yours to keep for eternity. he just struggles to fully give up control, especially since you know he’s not really had much of that in his life.

you kept his personality intact for the most part, but… he just seems so different. he responds pretty much the same, talks the same, acts the same. something just doesn’t seem right.

“here’s the coffee you asked for,” he mutters when he returns, his voice gruff but soft at the same time. he’s… definitely conflicted. the implanted urge to obey you mindlessly and the natural urge to protect his self-respect are fighting in his head. you watch curiously to see which will win.

leon has been through hell, and you can always see it when you look into his eyes. he’s been controlled by the government, a puppet on their strings, since he survived that night in raccoon city. he must be used to a lack of control in his life. but now he’s your puppet, and you have no interest in using him as a killing machine. you have… different plans for him.

“thanks,” you whisper, and he nods, quiet but obedient. just how you wanted him. he stands there beside you, not really knowing what to do with himself as you take a sip, “rub my feet now.”

“..what?”

“you heard me,” you say. and he did.

something in his stomach sinks at the command, a feeling of urgency to do as you say fills his entire being, but it just feels so wrong to him. you’re never this brazen, this demanding.

“come on, leon,” you say, almost condescendingly, pointing to the floor right in front of the couch, “on… your… knees.”

he breathes shakily, but kneels down in front of you, avoiding eye contact as he gives you your damn foot massage. there’s turmoil in his head, easily seen by that deer-like look in his eyes as he stares wide-eyed at the ground. despite his roughness, he’s always had these soft, fragile eyes, reminding you of who he really is. it would be truly heartbreaking to watch him go through this if it also wasn’t incredibly attractive to put him on his knees and order him around.

leon has always been relatively compliant, but now it’s on a whole other level. anything you ask for, despite some inner conflict, he’ll do. you wonder just how far you could push him, but… you don’t decide to test that just yet.

for a few minutes, or however long it takes for you to finish your coffee, you sit there with him. his touch is good but not very skilled. he gets the tension and soreness out though, and you’re sure you could train that into him over time.

“take off your shirt,” you say, and his throws off his t-shirt easily. it lands in the corner unimportantly, and your smirk radiates confidence and something else much more sinister, “stand up, bend over in front of me.”

he closes his eyes tightly, clearly fighting that inner battle but the part of him desperate to get away and to not obey you is losing. he slowly rises to his feet and does as you ask. he places his hands on the coffee table, legs spread slightly like he already knows what’s about to happen. funny, because he doesn’t seem to know much of anything right now.

you stand up, hands touching all over him but particularly grasping at his ass, pulling down his sweatpants and boxers and enjoying the way his muscles flex, tightening and hardening when you grab him, “you never let me spank you,” you muse, almost annoyed, “i get it. you get nervous with power play and letting me dom you or whatever, but i always wanted to hit it just once. just to satisfy the curiosity of what it would be like.”

your hand pulls back and slams against his butt with a loud smacking noise. he gasps, breathing out shakily after the hit, “i… i’m sorry, ma’am.”

“but now that we’re here… and i’ve already got a taste, i don’t think i ever want to stop. so, from now on, no more of that. if i want to slap your ass, i’m going to,” you murmur, “and you will not try to stop me or convince me not to.”

“i.. i…” he whimpers, and for a second you pause, nervously that the real leon, somehow deep down, heard that, “… yes, ma’am.”

“good,” you mutter, slapping it again, feeling the hit in your hand as you pull away, and if you can feel it so clearly then you’re sure he can, “now, be polite and say ‘thank you’. thank me for teaching you how to correctly behave.”

“tha… thank you, ma’am,” he whispers, eyes shutting slowly as his deep inner need to resist is weakening.

“i own you now,” you groan, grasping at his hips posessively, mouth pressing open kisses to his bare shoulder, “no, i… have always owned you. owned your body, you just didn’t realize it.”

he nods, incredibly turned on. his body aches to be claimed, to be made yours.

sure, leon has always been yours, but his body has been purely his. he’s… cautious with it. he’s been more or less just too busy for romantic partners, but somehow you snuck your way into his life and he happily lets you stay. he just… is slowly learning to trust you with himself.

he can do easy, comfortable, casual sex. what he can’t do is hand himself over to you like this, helplessly obedient, submissive in every possible way. as much as leon doesn’t have the energy to fight, tired and worn down, fighting is all he know.

your nails drag against the skin of his torso and back, leaving pretty red lines wherever they go, “no more fighting. no more stressing about it. all you have to do is be mine, unequivocally.”

“i… i am..” he mumbles, and you tilt your head, eyeing him curiously. he notices, shying away, “i… i am yours. unequivocally. you can… you can have me.”

manhandling has always been a little difficult, considering leon is all muscle and he’s a sturdy guy, but you spin him at the hips to face you, and he’s effortlessly moved, “can i… have your body just as much as i have your heart?”

“yes, i… yes, ma’am, it’s yours. do whatever you want with it, ma’am,” he says, a slight daze in his eyes, clearly he’s not all the way there. he's trying. he’s still so soft, so tender and malleable, so leon.

you lean in to press a kiss to his lips, and he melts into your touch, hands grasping him roughly, in a way that might hurt anyone else, but leon is strong. sure, your touch is bruising him, but… he doesn’t have enough

of his mind left to be bothered.

lips trail down his neck and shoulder, but move back up to his ear, sucking on his skin in a vampiric manner. you whisper to him, “you’re gonna only focus on my pleasure.”

“i… i am? i… i am…” he stutters, god it’s so damn cute.

“of course you are. you’d rather eat me out than have an orgasm yourself, wouldn’t you? if i was a crueler person, i would find a way to mind control your orgasms away completely. that way you could… focus on my pleasure, but i’m not that mean.”

he shudders, your lips pressing to the sensitive spot underneath his ear, teeth dragging down his skin, teasing him, taunting him.

“you wanna eat now?” you ask, lips pressed to his collarbone now, and he moans out an affirmative. you suck a hickey against the skin right atop of the bone, admiring the redness, the way you get to watch it turn a disgusting shade of purple. one that should make you nervous to have done to him, only turns you on.

instead of ordering him into his knees this time, you just push him, easily putting his head between your legs. his hands come up to hold your thighs, steadying himself as you half-stand half-sit on the counter. he pulls your pants down enough , but can’t even be bothered to take off your panties, just pushing them to the side.

“can.. i, ma’am?”

you chuckle, not really expecting him to be so polite, “go for it, sweet thing.”

he leans in, pressing a teasing kiss to your clit, just once, before his tongue meets your folds and he licks and sucks like tomorrow won’t come but he’ll make sure you will. he groans into your pussy like he’s the one being pleasured, and that honestly seems like a fair comparison. sure, he was physically pleasing you, but even just the act of giving oral is making his head spin with a satisfaction he has never felt before. he could get high off of this.

leon has always been good at giving head. much better than just good. he’s incredible. it’s the one thing where he can fully just zone out. if you’re too lost in your own pleasure, then you can’t focus on him and how he’s feeling, and there’s something oddly safe about the feeling of being, for all intents and purposes, alone with his thoughts. eating your pussy just comes so natural that it’s second nature.

but now? he can’t get lost in his thoughts if he doesn’t have any. doesn’t mean he’s enjoying it any less. he’s enjoying anything you ask him to do. you could tell him to go fold your laundry and then clean your bathroom and do your dishes and he’s do everything diligently and he’d be satisfied the whole time. god, maybe you do really want a househusband. besides, leon could use the emotional break from his job. he’s content enough serving you.

he makes you cum sooner than you expected, but it’s literally just because he’s that good with his tongue, and when he moved one his hands from your thigh to press two fingers into your cunt, fingering you in thick circular motions as he sucked on your clit, you were gone.

he continues, wet fingers gushing in a fast rhythm as you orgasm, grinding against his mouth, using him completely for your own pleasure. it was always a secret fantasy of his, and now it’s reality, even if his mind isn’t all the way there and the only thoughts running through his head are is she pleased with me? did i do a good job? do i deserve her praise? i should do better next time. i should serve her better. i only want to serve her.

and now that he’s completely helpless, servitude being the only concept he can comprehend, and you come down from a high so intense it took you a second to remember that leon was waiting patiently for your next command, next order.

“put… put me on the couch…” you gasp out in heavy breaths.

he’s strong, and he helps to guide you to the couch, body still part paralyzed from such an intense pleasure. you lay there, still breathing a little heavy.

“go get dressed and cleaned up…” you mutter to him, “and then come back out here and cuddle up next to me.”

he does as you ask, finding his clothes and getting dressed again, and then when he approaches the couch again, you reach out your arms for him. the smile he gives you is almost too real. too… really leon. you still feel that twinge of nervousness in your gut, but then he lays against you, head tucked into the crook of your neck, and you know he doesn’t know. for all that he’s good at, leon’s not a great actor.

you reach your hand up to run your fingers through his hair repeatedly, soft and soothing motions to lull him into a state of compliance.

“you’re mine,” you whisper, hoping he’ll confirm it back.

of course he does, softly, no longer feeling conflicted, “yours, ma’am.”

“you’ll be obedient and submissive from now on,” your voice is soft but carries a dominance he doesn’t quite think he could ever escape nor would he ever want to.

“i’ll be.. obedient and submissive.”

“you’ll only focus on my pleasure,” you say, knowing he’ll repeat it back obediently just like the ones previous, but you feel his rock hard cock against your leg and as much as you want to shove his cock inside of you in an instant, you can’t help but want to control him like that. keep his orgasms just out of reach until he goes mad from the teasing and edging you plan to do to him. keep him nice and horny and desperate, just how you like him. if he wasn’t submissive enough for you before, he is now.

“only yours, only ever yours, please…” his voice is soft and meek and god if you wanted to you could find a mind control that was permanent and just… leave him like this forever. let him take care of your home and future kids and do your household chores and tasks. keep him completely obedient, god it would be…

“you can’t resist,” you whisper, leaning into his hair,

resting your head against his in a soft intimate moment, “i can’t resist, ma’am.”

you nod gently, and after a moment, you sigh, running your fingers through his hair, “i’m.. i love you, leon. sorry about all of this..”

“… why are you apologizing, ma’am?” he asks, tilting his head slightly even in your grasp to show confusion. he really is just like a little puppy sometimes.

“you know.. about the mind control.”

he shrugs, the most unbothered happy smile on his face, “oh, that’s.. that’s okay, i’m fine with it. i.. already belonged to you.”

“but that was in a more… romantic way. an ‘i belong with you’ kind of way. not the kind i did to you,” you say, just a tinge of guilt holding you back, but you push it aside, “it’s nothing, don’t worry about it. i just.. just know i love you. even when i’m ordering you around.”

“i’ll remember that, ma’am,” he smiles up at you just a little softer, just a little more like his true self, just a little more leon. that heavy feeling of guilt in your gut will never quite go away, will it?

you fall asleep on the couch together, knowing or maybe just hoping you’ll wake up to leon not remembering anything. hopefully he doesn’t piece together that he has no memory of you giving him that hickey and those bruises on his hips were definitely not his job's doing.

—

you wake up to a fond smell of breakfast and a bright morning, sitting up off the couch as you look at your phone. leon’s not laying there next to you, which is odd but not completely uncommon. sometimes he goes out in the morning to work out or disappears in the middle of the night when he’s needed somewhere, but most of the time, and today included, he’s just in the kitchen.

you find him there, standing in front of the coffee pot, and you walk up to him to wrap your arms around his midsection, softly burying your face into his back to shyly hide from his gaze.

“awh, morning lovebug,” his sweet raspy morning voice says to you, a hand on your arms, holding you tight so there’s not even a chance you could let go, “missed ya yesterday. did you sleep alright?”

“...mhm,” you hum, pressing a sweet kiss to his shoulder blade.

it’s a sweet moment, full of love and warmth and tenderness and you could have almost forgotten what you did to leon last night had the smell of coffee not been hanging in the air. but hey, at least he doesn’t remember what really happened, though he’s kind of confused just how he forgot how he got all of these bruises and scratches.

[coredrill]

and more lagann-hen thoughts below the cut :]

i love you gurren lagann……….you’re so everything to me………i’m so grateful to have experienced these showings and i feel so strongly they should put these movies in theaters worldwide 😭 i’m writing this right after the last one and i’m nowheres near as jazzed as i was after all of the other showings and i feel like it’s because it’s somewhat bittersweet? it’s been a hell of a week+ and i can’t believe it’s over, but… we had a lot of fun, didn’t we? (absolutely bursts into tears)

anyways!! 4dx thoughts first:

I SAW IT IN 4DX ON TUESDAY CAUSE I WANTED TO MAKE SURE I COULD ACTUALLY PAY ATTENTION TO THE DUB BUT. THEY SHOWED THE DUB TUESDAY ANYWAY????? SO I SAW IT TWICE. IDK WHAT HAPPENED THERE BUT I’M SO HAPPY IT DID. THAT DUB SUMMONING CIRCLE POST FUCKING WORKED

at the scene where yoko’s just gotten simon outta prison and boota leaps into her titties the seats started bouncing too and like. causing some irl gainaxing i’m ngl 😭

ALSO YEAH WHEN SIMON VOMITS BLOOD THEY SPRAY YOU WITH WATER. AGAIN. WHAT WAS GOING ON IN THESE 4DX PLANNING SESSIONS

i went to a different 4dx theater this time and they kept??? blasting the back of our legs with air??? and they did not do that during gurren-hen and i am SO confused what that was all about

every time i watch that scene where arc gurren transforms into arc gurren lagann i think to myself “those poor civilians are probably getting JOSTLED” and HAVING NOW FELT IT MYSELF. THEY SURE WERE 😭

ALSO i know why wakabayashi fell out of his seat while watching. and it’s because THEY PURPOSELY TRY TO KNOCK YOU OUT OF IT!!!!!! like when viral throws lagann at the antispiral and when lagann throws simon, they hit you in the back HARD and if i hadn’t been gripping the armrest for dear life i would’ve been knocked out too 😭 the lordgenome battle was crazy too, as well as Literally everything after they escape the labyrinth. which is expected but DAMN it was a wild time!!!

the fog floating around the theater during The Scene with kamina. fucking ethereal

OKAYYYY konishi & trigger interview/lead-in thoughts:

konishi’s little speech was so funny omg 😭 he really was like “i know some of you only came for this movie and not the first one” LMAOOOO. he also spend a HOT minute being like “this is the end of gurren lagann! the very end! there’s no more! please enjoy the end! 😇” and i KNOW trigger is smart enough to not make a sequel or anything BUT THE WAY HE WAS SAYING IT had me worried i’d get hit with some “surprise! third movie!” after the end of this one LMFAO

they said that the reason they added SO much new animation for lagann-hen was because the end of gurren-hen got such a good reception from fans and like. it’s WILD to hear that as i do still, in my mind, view these as “compilation movies” but i always forget JUST HOW MUCH of lagann-hen is just. completely new LMAO. and it’s really interesting as i feel like the new animation is kind of more dispersed throughout the movie than being back-loaded like in gurren-hen!!

koyama also mentioned something really sweet, that when they were finishing up making this movie they had pulled in a whole bunch of different animators from other studios, and it really felt similar to the spirit of gurren lagann itself in that it was stronger because everyone was working together 🥺 making myself tear up typing this out tbh but i really do love how much of ttgl’s message and story is part of its production………i think it really helps contribute to like, the honesty and sincerity of the story!!!!

AND NOW FOR MY DUB THOUGHTS:

HOLLYYYYYYYYYYYYY SHIT THIS DUB WAS AMAZING. even better than gurren-hen’s by a LONG shot - though admittedly i think it’s also benefitted by having so much changed dialogue, and so there’s not as much direct comparison that can go on? still, everyone fucking killed it and i’m so so so excited to buy this on bluray and listen to it every day LMAO

anyways all that said, my very small gripes that literally don’t even matter because i’m so fucking stoked that we HAVE A DUB AND ITS AWESOME: yoko’s performance is still not doing it for me 😭 i feel like her lines suffered the most from the stricter adherence to lip flaps, and she was still doing the head voice thing that she did in the first movie… also they pronounced “anne” as “ann” rather than “ah-neh” which surprised me, and ALSO at one point i think cybela said “laGAHN” rather than “lagann”? but they said darry’s name right and also these are SUCH tiny nitpicks that they don’t even matter cause everythign else ruled so hard LMAO.

VIRAL. AMAZING AS EXPECTED. LITERALLY NO NOTES HE WAS PERFECT. also that scene where lordgenome’s like “we have to steal my old moon gunman” and viral’s like “well it’s a good thing that your SPECIALTY is STEALING GUNMEN, simon” had me DYING. cut the man a break viral, you’ve been on his side for two seconds and yet could not wait any longer to sass him LMFAO

KITTAN RULED ALSO. his whole speech to gimmy - when he said “show me someone who ain’t afraid of dyin’ and i’ll show you a liar!” it fucking HIT. GOD. and his final sacrifice??? honestly on par with or even better than the tv version, god, he KILLED IT.

also gimmy!! and darry!!! i’m WILDLY impressed that they still sounded like their old selves here!!! excellent job!!!

the antispiral was really great too - crispin freeman did a great job of making him more, like, unhinged overall??? like when he is going to TOWN on ttgl and tearing it apart and there was BLOOD EVERYWHERE JESUS. that part is shocking in visuals alone but he knocked it out of the park with the voice acting too!!!

I Cannot Believe They Made Johnny Yong Bosch Say “i’m a fool of epic proportions!” Out Loud In English With His Mouth. about to integrate that into my own vocabulary tbh LMAO, i figured they would’ve tweaked the wording there a little!! either way though he ALSO KILLED IT AS ROSSIU, god his “so many others” like was PERFECT in its equal desperation and relief and i know nia is the one who says it but “rossiu cannot save humanity. he can’t even save himself.” makes me go ten types of crazy insane stupid oh my GODD

at one point dayakka had the line “oh no! the giga drill broke?” and i swear to god i saw the 2007 youtube compilation of “giga drill breaks” ending with that line in full 480p in my mind when he did LMAO. on par with simon’s “you mean we need an EVEN BIGGER DRILL? 😱” from the tv show

NIAAAAAAA OH MY GOD. she was INCREDIBLE, like her “no way! 😇” wasn’t as strong as in the tv version imo but HER ANTISPIRAL VOICE????? god it was soooo sinister it killed me. also every scene of her and simon… when she accepted his proposal i was full-on sobbing, maybe romance IS real………

AND NOW. SIMON. YURI FUCKING LOWENTHAL MY GOD. i knew he was gonna kill it since he did amazing in gurren-hen despite not sounding 14 anymore BUT OH MY LORD. I WAS NOT EXPECTING HIM TO COMPLETELY ALTER MY PERCEPTION OF SIMON AS A CHARACTER FOR THE BETTER. AND YET HE DID. LIKE. you can HEAR how much simon is struggling emotionally in this movie much MUCH more so than you can in any other version imo, like the fucking prison scene???? the way he sounded so resigned and defeated and NOT ACTUALLY CONTENT but knowing that he NEEDS to be content JESUS CHRIST. he literally NEEDED viral to jump in front of that blast from nia and save him oh my god. and during the final battle too, you can just Hear his struggle through his voice. his struggle with his spiral power, and how much of it he has, and controlling it when he maybe doesn’t WANT to. his struggle to move forward and fight with Everything he has despite knowing that Nia Will Die. simon as a force of nature, simon as a galaxy, simon as someone to whom the spiral nemesis is Already Happening and yet literally simon just some guy. i am going to start chewing through my walls. FUCK!!!!!!!!! thank you yuri lowenthal this was LIFE CHANGING. BLURAY WHEN

anyways. i’m ngl my undereye bags are starting to look like ep9 simon’s so uh. i’m v excited to go to bed at 8:30pm every night for the next two weeks 😅 highly extremely worth every second of sleep lost tho!!!

[rodolfoparras]

Hi Alec

I usually like to just quietly read your stuff (and like it) cause it's seriously so good. You're probably one my favorite blogs on here and I just wanted to say something.

Regarding that one rude comment you got, I believe it's one of the consequences of the internet. People tend to forget account owners are also people low-key and lose all sort of basic respect.

And well, just wanted to say that although I have never actively interacted with your blog besides liking your posts, I love your writing and the way your blog is built (especially your Price stuff, if I could turn those posts into food I'd eat them every day) And I have an enormous respect for your ability to write, cause I suck at writing, like, my brain has many ideas but they're impossible to channel into a drabble or a fic.

Sugar thank you soso much for your sweet words for even reading my work that genuinely has my heart so full🥹

And I completely agree with you! Ive seen anons on here be upfront nasty to writers and it’s like dude I know you wouldn’t act like this if you saw me irl so it’s embarrassing you’re doing it on anon😭

Also let me tell you sugar the writing you see is a skill I worked on for a long time even when I first started this blog I had to learn how to write from scratch in terms of how to put an idea into a fic, what parts make the story interesting and what dont, how to keep myself short in fics but how to also expand on my ideas, I know it might not feel very encouraging when you feel that way but please write sugar

One way I’d suggest is if you have an idea or a plot in your head, use one of my posts as like framework for it, see how I start a story how I further develop the plot and how I wrap it up

As you’re doing it you’ll find yourself thinking “well I don’t like writing as descriptive as you but I like how you introduce the character, I don’t like the metaphors but I like how you write the character” and this is how a writing style is born🫶🏻

Believe me sugar to be a writer you just need to have the ideas that’s all it takes I wish you the utmost best and pls pls pls write and bring your stories to life 🫶🏻

[m34gs]

In your opinion, what are the five most memorable/iconic traps in the Saw franchise?

Oh boy, friend, what a floodgate you've opened....mwahahahaha. Thank you for this ask, I'm rather excited to answer it! It'll be tough to choose just five, but I can do it! :D

I'm going to set myself criteria, because there are a lot of traps and many of them are very interesting; both in the motive behind the trap as well as the mechanics of it. So, I will be judging based on if I have seen fanart of the trap/how often I see fan art of the trap, if I see other people on social media discuss the trap in detail, if I've heard other people discuss the trap irl, and if the trap makes reappearances in sequel movies (either on new individuals, or as a flashback). I will not be doing large traps; that is traps where the person involved has to complete multiple traps in order to progress through a building and get out, but I will include the individual traps within those traps...if that makes sense (this will probably make more sense when I get to explaining the traps I've chosen). I think that's a fair starting point. We do have 9 movies of traps to work through.

Remember, this is my opinion, and is by no means The Golden Standard. If people don't like my opinion, that is fine, but make they can make their own post about it please.

I'm putting the rest under a cut, because this is Saw. There is a copious amount of gore and torture, and even just discussing it could make people not used to it queasy. (though I'll be doing my best not to be too over the top with the horror talk lol) For trigger warnings, read the post tags first. Also; people should just assume spoilers for any Saw 1-9 are possible in this post.

5. Needle Pit: The Needle Pit starts us off at number 5. Not one that usually gets a whole lot of discussion surrounding it, but I have seen a fair share of memes about how people cringe when they watch this one, and I have actually come across fanart themed for it, usually focused mostly on Amanda, the trap's victim, but still involving the trap itself; so it counts. Because I don't expect people who don't watch to know what all the traps are, I will explain them all briefly.

Here we go: Eight people are trapped in a house where they are exposed to a neurotoxin in the air. The Needle Pit trap is a part of the house, a trap within a trap (hopefully now my earlier distinction makes more sense). A pit full of syringes...with the needles all attached. Among them is hidden a key that needs to be dug out within a time limit. If the key is not found prior to the timer going off, the door it opens will be sealed forever, making one of the antidote doses for the toxin unreachable. The Needle Pit was not meant to be Amanda's trap; it was meant for a drug dealer, as atonement for preying upon the struggles of people addicted to drugs. However, Xavier isn't about to climb down into the pit himself, so he shoves Amanda in instead. Every fiber of my being cringes when she lands in the pit of needles. I've heard a lot of people say they find that one of the hardest to watch.

4. Glass Coffin: The Glass Coffin coming in at number 4! This trap never fails to get me, honestly. I'm always yelling at the screen, telling Strahm to just get in the damn box. He never does. Though it's not as often as some of the others on this list, I've seen this trap referenced in fanfiction, in memes (specifically about Hoffman and Strahm as a ship) and I honestly find it one hard to forget.

Peter Strahm is at the scene of a trap, hoping to catch Mark Hoffman, a Jigsaw apprentice undercover as a detective. Peter enters a room, and in the center of the room is a coffin made of glass with broken glass scattered inside of it. There's a recording to listen to; it tells him to climb inside, but he gets distracted by a noise in the hall. Instead of listening further to the tape, Strahm hides and waits for Hoffman. He shoves Hoffman inside and the coffin locks. It's only after the door to the room shuts behind him that he realizes his error and listens to the rest of the tape. The glass coffin lowers into the floor, keeping Hoffman safe. The walls of the room close in on Strahm. In my opinion, this is also one of the worst traps. In a lot of other ones, the death is instantaneous if you fail. In this one, you can do nothing but watch the walls draw ever closer at a steady pace, waiting to be crushed. It's also one of the most frustrating because if Strahm had just listened to the tape and followed directions, or fought Hoffman in the hallway, or even immediately ran out of the room after shutting the coffin instead of staying to taunt Hoffman, he would have survived. (Strahm and Hoffman are also a ship pairing for the fandom, which is fun!)

3. Brazen Bull: I brought this one in because if there is ONE trap that most people seem to agree is fucking unfair, it's this one. Not unfair as in "inescapable" (you know I could do a whole nother list just dedicated strictly to those), but unfair as in someone totally innocent is punished for a man's lies. I've seen/heard a lot of people rant and rave about how this trap is bullshit because of that. And honestly, it really is. I hate it so much. Which makes it really unforgettable.

The trap: So, the Brazen Bull takes place in the seventh Saw movie. Bobby Dagen is a man who lied about being a previous Jigsaw survivor for the fame and money. Ironically, he gets Jigsaw's attention and has to go through a series of traps to save not only himself but also the people who lied with him (his publicist, his lawyer, and his best friend). He's been unsuccessful. When he gets to the last part, it's based off the trap he claimed he escaped before...with a twist. He has to pull himself up using chains that he has to hook into his flesh and reach an extension cord. Plug in the cord, and save his wife. His innocent wife who never knew he lied because she only met him after he became an alleged "survivor". His sweet wife who fell in love with him and was just trying to support a man she thought was traumatized from being a victim of Jigsaw's games. If he fails (he does), she will be roasted alive inside the Brazen Bull, which is based on an alleged historical method of torture and death. Most fans I personally know hate this trap.

2. Bathroom Trap: The Bathroom Trap comes in at number 2! Honestly, how could it not? It's the entirety of the first movie. It's the entire reason for Chainshipping. It's got so much fanart, so many references in text posts here on Tumblr, and it's impossible to forget because you'd literally have to forget the entire movie while remembering the rest of the franchise. You don't need to say "Lawrence and Adam in the bathroom" or "The first Saw Movie with the Bathroom", you literally just say "The Bathroom" and the fandom knows what you are talking about. We know. There's so much discussion around it, so much dissecting, so many edits, it's truly one of the most iconic in the franchise.

Lawrence and Adam wake up in a dingy bathroom with no windows and only one door out. They are each chained to the bathroom, on opposite ends. Between them lies a body in a puddle of what appears to be blood. The only way out? Saw off their legs with one of the rusty saws provided and crawl to freedom. What makes this so memorable isn't the trap itself; it's the way it was done. Lawrence knows nothing about Adam, Adam knows he was hired by someone to take photos and essentially stalk Lawrence. As the story unfolds, we learn more and more about them, and we see them start to develop some sort of camaraderie because they are trapped together. The ending, of course, ripped a hole in the heart of Chainshippers. Lawrence is able to escape. Adam is not. (he is alive and well in my HEART)

Honourable mentions: Razor Wire Maze (Saw, 2004) - crawl through a maze of razor wire (barbed wire), Pendulum Trap (Saw V) - crush the hands to stop a pendulum blade from dropping steadily lower and cutting the body in half, Public Execution (Saw VII) - three people, involved in cheating on each other, are in a large box in public; two tied to saws and one suspended above...they must decide which two survive, The Bedroom (Saw IV) - a rapist must gouge out his own eyes using a machine and hold the mechanism in place long enough to prevent his limbs being torn off, Shotgun Collar (Saw III) - a surgeon must keep Jigsaw alive long enough to watch another trap be completed; if his heart stops before the gun collar around her neck is removed, it will blow her head off (this trap also has a ship: the surgeon, Lynn, and Jigsaw's apprentice, Amanda), Shotgun Carousel (Saw VI) - six people are strapped to a carousel and it will stop each one of them in front of a gun at one point; the only way to stop the gun from going off is for their boss (who is forced to watch) to press a button which will drill into his own hand...and he can only save two.

Reverse Bear Trap: No one is probably shocked by this. This is it. This is the iconic trap. It's THE trap. It gets used and referenced multiple times in the series, there is so much fanart of characters in the trap, or even just the trap itself, and it's so easily recognizable.

The trap itself is simple. It's a bear trap that is reversed; instead of swinging shut, it explodes open. A metal piece is placed in the victim's mouth, ensuring that if they do not find the key and get it off in time, their head will be ripped open.

This trap appears in Saw (2004) as the trap Amanda Young is in prior to her becoming an apprentice to Jigsaw. She manages to get her key, unlock the trap, pull it off her head, and escape. It appears in Jigsaw's workshop in Saw III. It gets used on Hoffman in Saw VI; and he escapes even though he is not meant to, as it was meant to be a betrayal by Jigsaw's wife Jill. In Saw VII, Jill falls victim to the trap as revenge from Hoffman, and she dies. But, before all of that, The Reverse Bear Trap is in a short film, the short that predates the entire rest of the series. Referred to often as Saw 0.5 (2003), the original short film features the Reverse Bear Trap as it's only trap. It is actually almost the exact scenario Amanda faced, but with a man named David being the victim instead. It's a 9 minute film that was used to pitch the idea for Saw (2004). It can be found on YouTube, which is where I watched it.

So, yeah, the Reverse Bear Trap is very ingrained in the franchise. Anyone in the fandom would recognize it. There's even people who haven't seen any of the movies who have heard of it.

Hope that was entertaining and not too graphic for you! Thanks for the ask, I had a lot of fun answering!!!

[sawadavampaneze]

I always think it's strange how most of people in Yuumori fandom always assume a person who doesn't ship Sherliam is homophobic and who thinks "Bondler doesn't have enough evidence in manga to be called a trans" is transphobic. And I mean, we don't even know if the person we criticize is in lgbtq+ or support the community or not, so it's all subjective assumptions. It's funny how a person who ships other BL couples in manga but not Sherliam will be judged just because they don't follow the majority of the fandom. It's also funny how the voice actors, the stage/musical actors/actress or even the author/artist using Irene or Adler when refering to the character in female appearance but the global fandom only criticize any fan to not call Bondler with that name while they are in their original female identity.

Many people got into Yuumori for the Moriarty brothers' ideal. And while Moriarty team wants to protect and defends for the Weak. Fans support their ideal but also choose to be the one who oppresses the minority within the same fandom. How ironic is that!

I'm currently playing an otome game called "Cupid Parasite". When two suitors had a small fight (due to different perspectives) and then Gill (the first suitor) made an apology to Allan (the latter), I thought a lot about how many people in Yuumori fandom (or any other fandoms) can not realized that they should actually listen and maybe try to put themselve in other people's shoes to understand different opinions. Sometimes we put ourselve too much into a character that we forget that in the end of the day, we are not them. And instead of that, we value a 2D character over an actual person (either through the internet or irl, either the person has good intention or share the same interest), it's all because the character has our empathy or has something in common with us (which makes us feel validating when defending for them). Please don't ever forget there's a diversity in a normal fandom and people can freely express their opinions either it's the same with you or not. Things should be discussed in a more peaceful way than this. Also, defending for any community is good but this is about connecting logically details in manga. And you should defend for a character or a shipping because you truly like them with all your heart, not because you want to use them to prove something for yourself, your belief or your own identity irl.

Idk why I thought of Yuumori fandom maybe because I still care. I should have cut any loose end I have with this series at this point. Still, I just hope the fandom could be a better place for anyone who feel left out. I always feel bad for any of them that I came across online.

Quoting from Gill because I thought a lot about Yuumori fandom while reading his online post in game. Also this below is the reason I decided to make this post.

"... After reflecting on my thoughts, I apologized Allan for our fight. Ultimately, we decided to respect one another and talk through over disagreement. Honestly, I think it was wrong of me to think my opinion was the only one correct in the first place. Allan and I are two different people from different backgrounds. It's okay that we have different values and ideals. I guess I forgot that and tried to push my own values onto others. That's what caused that fight I wish no one saw.

I'm really sorry about that.

From now on, we won't flat-out deny one another's opinions. However, we also won't ignore our own feelings either. We'll respect other and work together to meet in the middle and find different solutions.

When complete strangers live together, it's natural that problems will occur. We have to remember that. We are strangers after all. We should acknowledge that there're people who live by a creed different from our own. Still, that doesn't mean that we should assume the worst of someone new. Even strangers can find common ground to stand in.

That's how I want to live my life. I think connecting like that would make living much more fufilling..."

When I wanted some rom-com for my life, the things in the game stressed me out more hahaha Also Allan shares the same VA with Yuumori Sherlock, which makes me feel like I'm dating Sherlock sometimes 😓 Still, it's a good game and the plot is chef-kissed 😊

I actually never be called homophobic or transphobic when I was in Yuumori fandom. But I've seen a lot of people being judged because they just wanted to voice their opinions about the manga. Even the anime staffs are being called homophobic by some fans just because they didn't animate chapter 31. Well, although this post is a call-out for the fandom's behaviour, I don't care if I will get called by those tittles after posting it. I support the lgbtq+ community both online + irl and also to any friend of mine so those're enough. One of my friends even came out to me since 10 years ago and I still immediately accepted them. Irene/Bondler is a different and complicated case, I actually asked myself a lot before whether Bondler is a trans but manga just doesn't have enough evidence to strengthen this point. No one's opinion is incorrect here because the issue is too vague in canon, only the attitude of each person towards the others is right or wrong. This issue should have been a more peaceful discussion. Also, my most favorite fanfic writter in Yuumori fandom is a long-time and die-hard Sherliam stan (although it's funny that they never brag about "the couple is canon in manga") and they only write about this couple (actually they only write Yuumori fanfic too). I don't ship the couple but yeah, they're my fav writter. That why I don't need any confirmation from online people who will judge me for using my brain to think instead of letting my feelings to control me and accuse the others. Yuumori fandom can be insecured about the manga (I understand because there're too many plotholes) or about anything else but at least don't let your insecurity irl clouding the way you treat other people online.

If anyone wants to defend anything, feel free to comment or talk under this post or through inbox. I don't mind some friendly discussion as long as the two parties respect the other and stick to manga's logic, not to people's irl identity/issue.

[wolfstar-in-color]

June Creator Spotlight: BigBlackDog

Hello, colorful cuties, and welcome to our first creator spotlight!!

Each month, we will highlight a different creator in our lovely fandom who features diverse characterizations. We will invite you to get to know them better through questions and answers, Fandom Discourse(tm), and a featured prompt created by our guest!!!

For our first spotlight, we are more than pleased to highlight the incredible work of bigblackdog!!! See a little snippet of this wonderful interview below, along with bigblackdog’s prompt! Look below the cut for our complete interview. Don’t forget to share and interact with this post, and if you have anyone you’d like to recommend for a spotlight, shoot us an ask! You can find our first guest’s Tumblr here.

“I've experienced ups and downs in the wolfstar fandom. It often feels like the wolfstar fandom is willing to engage in discussion about every political issue but race. And the few people who are trying to talk about race consistently encounter this silence.”

bigblackdog’s prompt: I want to see more latino characters who are not impoverished or criminalized. Give me a joyful latino/e remus!

Hello, I'm bigblackdog! I'm almost 30, and I've been active in fandom on various platforms for about seven years now. I'm latina/e and live in the u.s. with a small white dog.

Q: How did you start creating in the fandom? What did you wish to bring into the fandom? 

A: Like a lot of fans I started with self insert fic as a middle schooler. Sometimes the practice of self-insert gets ragged on in fandom, as if you're not doing real character work, but I think it's really cool. And if you're an under represented identity in the traditional western canon of literature, self insert is a radical practice. Making space for yourself in a story that refuses or ignores your identities is a radical act. And that's what i want to bring to fandom-- disruption and self care.

Q: What things about s/r as characters or in their relationship inspire you to create around them? 

A: Wolfstar was the first queer ship I was introduced to. I wasn't someone who arrived in fandom with my own robust queer reading skills, I needed other queers to hold my hand and introduce me to queer ships and how to find them and build them. My interest in r/s was simply a clinging to queerness I wasn't finding in other places. I really think it could have been any characters, as long as they were queer.

Q: What things would you like to highlight about the Wolfstar fandom and your experience in it? 

A: I've experienced ups and downs in the wolfstar fandom. It often feels like the wolfstar fandom is willing to engage in discussion about every political issue but race. And the few people who are trying to talk about race consistently encounter this silence. It's hard not to feel bitter. But i've also met some amazing people and overall feel that fans really are trying their best to be welcoming and inclusive.

Q: What type of content do you wish you saw more in the fandom? 

A: I want to see more discourse that aims at amplifying underrepresented voices like wolfstar-in-color. I want to see more fans of color joyfully and irreverently writing themselves into the magical world!

Q: What is your favourite wolfstar fancontent (fic/fanart/gifset/etc) and how does it inspire you? 

A: I love dontthinkonithermione's rp. Not only does she do an amazing nerdy know it all Hermione, she envisions Black characters in every corner of the hp world. Have you seen her Hogwarts p.e. professor rps? i love the space she creates for herself, and the joy she does it with.

Q: Which of your own identities inform your creative processes? How has that process been for you? 

A: I started out in fandom really trying to feel out the nooks and crannies of being queer. As i've spent more time in fandom and become more confident in my queerness I've started looking closer at some of my other identities-- Latina, mixed, adhd-- and how i can squeeze them into the hp world. For a long time it was hard, especially with being Latine and mixed, to envision how that identity could belong in a 90s British boarding school in the Scottish wilderness. I also really struggled with the feeling that i would get "diversity" wrong. I’ve also struggled with feeling like I have to write diversity because i'm an underrepresented voice. Brown people are often pressured to do the work of educating white people about racism and in fandom spaces that often means pressure to write the reality of racism instead of the fantasy that white writers get to play with. And sometimes i just want to write a pwp without worrying about the revolution, you know? But i really love fandom for its refusal to play by the rules of capitalism and canon, eventually i started to feel like putting more of myself into my writing was another rule i could break.

Q: What advice do you have for other content creators with diverse backgrounds in the fandom? What would you say to people that might feel they don’t have the “right” history/experience/characteristics to participate in the creation of content related to Wolfstar? 

First, there's a lot of content on tumblr that aims to silence your voice, learn how to recognize the difference between cancel culture and encouragement. Sometimes content that seems well meaning still presents writing diversity as a list of black and white rules (and virtue signaling) instead of encouragement for underrepresented voices to share their own messy experience. Set those rules gently aside. Second, fandom is built on the idea that the author isn't the only person who gets to play. we all get to play. It doesn't always feel like we were invited, but the great thing about fandom is there is no barrier to entry, no prior experience or publishing hoops to jump through. This is our playground too. If canon is dead then why can't our stories be brown and queer and neurodivergent? Third, find your people. i've found that having just one other person to talk about race with has made the whole space feel more welcoming.

Q: How could we build a more diverse fandom? 

A: We have to stop prioritizing white and cis male voices. We recognize that policing irl is a problem inextricable from whiteness and maleness, but we don't see that fandom policing online is also a problem deeply embedded in whiteness and maleness. White and cis male people frequently use their discomfort with difficult topics to change the subject from a critical discussion to one that prioritizes their white and/or male feelings. The same thing happens online when personal discomfort is used to cancel or undermine content that's challenging to a white or male voice. White and cis male voices are used to having their needs met above others. And we still cater to that in fandom spaces when we privilege 'fetishization' discourse over racial discourse. When we lift up bipoc and women/trans/nb voices and the issues they're concerned with we'll make fandom a more welcoming place for underrepresented voices.

Q: What’s your favourite thing to modify in Sirius’s or Remus’s characterizations to bring new perspectives to them? 

A: It really depends on the story i'm writing and what issue i'm trying to figure out. Sometimes i need Sirius to be Adhd to come to terms with my brain, sometimes i need two brown boys to fall in love and be happy against all odds.

Q: What does diversity mean to you? What does that encompass in fannish spaces? 

A: This is a hard question! I tend to think of diversity as those voices that are disenfranchised or pushed to the margins. And fannish spaces have all the same hierarchies and blind spots as other spaces. In fannish spaces there's the idea that you can curate your experience to some extent, but for marginalized voices, at least in my experience, no matter how much you curate the marginalization is still there.

Q: What are your ideas about the notions of culture and ethnicity? How do you relate to those notions? 

A: There was a time in my life where relating to my ethnicity was largely a process of recognizing larger systems of oppression and how they worked against my various identities. And for a while it was a really helpful way to frame my experiences. Now I feel a little less attached to ethnicity as like, a monolithic concept threaded through my whole life and more attached to the small things that I enjoy about my ethnicity and culture-- making a really good pot of beans, for example.

Q: Leave us with a quote or work of art that always inspires you. 

A: "Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare." Audre Lorde

[agathasangel]

leave everything behind but me- part 4 (diane sherman x reader) (NSFW moment)

warnings: same as before, stalking (like full on irl stalking as well as online), drugging, some talk of emotional/physical abuse in this one, death mention. this whole fic is just kinda dark... sorry. Also brief nsfw moment.

summary: this part is from Diane’s perspective. as she looks for her neurotoxin ingredients in a panic, she reflects on how she came into contact with you in the first place, and all the highs and lows of your relationship up to this point.

where the hell are they? thought Diane, looking for the last, most important ingredient in her neurotoxin.

She couldn’t believe it had come to this again. Just like with Chloe.

Diane wondered where Chloe was, what she was doing. About five years ago, with an excellent defense lawyer, she managed to get out of jail for what she had done. She looked far and wide for her stolen daughter, who seemed to be nowhere to be found. She still worried about what became of Chloe, but knew she was probably doing alright. And one day, Diane found a new obsession by the name of (y/n).

It was nearly two years ago now. Diane was beginning to give up on finding Chloe, after three full years of searching anywhere and everywhere with no luck. But she did find something else. 

She was staying at a hotel in California, near the hospital where she gave birth to Chloe, in the vain hope that maybe, just maybe, Chloe would be around.

Diane didn’t find Chloe, but she found something else from her past. Her college reunion was being held in the exact hotel she was staying at. She didn’t plan on attending, but then she came face-to-face with her college rival. This woman was the only person who did better in her classes than Diane. Not only that, but she had multitudes of friends, boyfriends, you name it, while Diane had no one. The woman never let Diane forget how much better she was either. It wasn’t the worst thing Diane had ever been through, not by a long shot, but it was a disappointment for sure. College was supposed to be the place where Diane could finally feel like she belonged, and she always resented this rival of hers. 

“Diane! We didn’t think you were coming! Oh here, have a seat!” said the woman.

“I’m so sorry about Roger. It was such a shock to hear about.”, she continued, reminding Diane of her dead husband

“Yeah, I still can’t say I’m over it, all these years later.”

“Yeah when the love of your life just drops dead like that, you never get over it, do you?”, she said, far louder than Diane would have liked.

“Can we please talk about something else?”

“Of course, I’m so sorry, Diane, I know it must be so hard for you!”

“Yeah. Um... what’s your family like?”

“Well we have one daughter. Her name is (y/n), and she’s a senior in High School,” said the woman. She then leaned into Diane and said, “But can I be honest? I never exactly wanted kids. Never liked them. I thought it would change when I had her but it didn’t. She’s so... difficult.”

Diane’s blood absolutely boiled hearing this, but she managed to keep a polite face, “But that’s your child. Don’t you love her?”

“There are some good things about her, I guess. I do love her in my own way, but I can’t help but feel disappointed. She’s just not what I thought she’d be. I’m sorry, I thought you may understand. I never get to vent my frustrations about her.”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t understand. But, do you, um, by any chance have a picture of her?”

“On my phone, somewhere. Let me look.”

After a while, she found a picture of (y/n). It was fairly recent photo of you at a restaurant, at what looked like a dinner with the whole family. You looked sad and lost, but Diane thought you looked sweet.

“She’s beautiful.”

“Thanks,” said the woman, almost stifling a laugh, as if there was no way Diane could have meant that.

“I’m sorry, I need to go to the bathroom.” said Diane, as she was starting to turn red in anger and the woman.

“I’ll join you, I need to freshen up a bit.”

“Fine.”

So Diane walked straight into a stall while the other woman followed. Diane started to cry, so angry at this awful woman. She had a child, a beautiful, sweet, girl who was alive, for God’s sake. Diane would kill for what she has, in fact she had killed for it before. But this woman didn’t care about her child, she didn’t appreciate you one bit.

She didn’t deserve you. 

Then she heard the woman get into the stall next to her and she decided to leave. But the woman left her purse on the sink. Diane looked into her purse and found everything. All her information was in her wallet, and she took pictures of her address, phone number, and credit card numbers, as well as a couple of photos of you and your father. Diane quickly threw the last photo back into her purse as she heard her enemy get up, and she ran away, all the way back up to her room. 

Diane looked at the photos, and started to look for your social media. You didn’t seem to post very often, or have many friends. Most of your photos were of you by yourself, or pretty things you took pictures of, and even a couple of sad poems you wrote. Poetry written by teenagers was usually laughably bad, but hers made Diane cry. She saw herself in you.

Poor little thing, Diane thought. She needs some love. But I can do that for her.

Diane spent about a month following you and your parents around, without any of you even noticing her presence. One day she snuck into their house and bugged it, so that there were feeds of different rooms streaming to her computer at all times.

Diane noticed you spent most of your time alone. You wrote in a journal a lot, and cried fairly often, hugging a teddy bear you had. You just seemed so burnt out from stress from school, stress from your job, pressure from your parents. You fought with both of her parents often. Well... fight wasn’t the right word. Usually, one parent would yell at you and insult you, and you would choose to either take it or not take it.

There was one particular instance where you snapped at your father, telling him how he abandoned you so many times. He didn’t take this well, screaming all kinds of insults. How Diane wished she could hold you, rock you, comfort you and tell you that aren’t any of the terrible things your father told you, and that she’s sorry that you never felt good enough.

Diane snuck into (y/n)’s graduation, too. She knew she couldn’t contact you yet, but she got so much happiness out of just seeing this milestone of your life. All you did was walk across the stage and take your diploma, but Diane beamed with pride for you as you did it.

After graduation, your parents were constantly threatening to kick you out, and the fights got worse, they crying got worse. Diane wished she was there, comforting you, holding you and giving you all the love that your parents didn’t. Diane looked for a window of opportunity into this girl’s life until she found the perfect one. You had put out an ad on facebook for anyone on the east coast looking for a roommate, and Diane put her plan into action. She made a fake account on facebook pretending to be a college girl named “Anna Johnson” and responded to the ad, starting to talk to and getting friendly with you. “Anna” suggested that you take a bus trip and offered to pay the fare, but you refused because you wanted to earn the money yourself. Diane’s heart warmed at your sweet messages, even though they were to “Anna” and not her. “I’ve never had as good a friend as you before”, “Who needs a mom when I have you giving me such great advice?”, “You’re the best!”, every little message that you sent to Diane made her fall more and more in love. Diane bought a little house on the East Coast with the money she got from selling her old house, and hoped everything will fall into place in her new life with (y/n). 

Now during the bus trip, Diane needed to follow you closely in her silver minivan, and make sure not to lose track of you during layovers either. Her detour into the coffee shop scared her at first, but once Diane found you, it was the perfect opportunity to finally, after all these months of dreaming, meet you face-to-face. Her new little baby girl, finally. Diane slipped a powdered sleeping pill into her already tired girl’s coffee to make you even more sleepy and suggestible, getting you to come with her to her hotel room.

Back in the present, Diane found the rest of the powdered sleeping pills as she was searching through her medicine cabinet and closet. She got so distracted thinking about you, and all the horribly wrong things she had done to you. 

It’s for her own good, all of it. She needs to be protected, she’s too pure for this world, to good, too sweet...

Diane searched through the drugs she had given you, thinking of all the best times the two of you have had.

The first day Diane had been with you in the little house was heaven on earth. Finally Diane had everything she’s been working for for almost a year now right there, in her arms. Diane wanted to give you everything you didn’t believe you deserved. The only catch was that you belonged to Diane, and Diane alone.

She got a job teaching Chemistry at the local High School fairly easily, as she had extensive knowledge (even more extensive than she may have let on in her interview), of the subject, and the school district was completely desperate for competent science teachers. Diane found faking the background check easy, she used her maiden name and an incorrect date of birth and they didn’t ask her about her arrest at all. And now she had her new life set up. A house that she owned, a job to put food on the table, and you.

The next best day for Diane was the day you finally kissed her. Diane was starting to fall in love with you in a more romantic, even a more sexual way, but didn’t know if you felt the same way about her. Then, during one of your movie nights, you kissed Diane, and she felt overjoyed. She kissed you back and finally led you to the bed and fucked you, like she had been thinking about doing every night at this point but was too scared to actually initiate until now. She was in love with the feeling she got from kissing you, from pleasing you. It had been so long since Diane had been this intimate with anyone, and she was your first. And it was a real awakening for the both of you.

It felt so good, you felt so good. This relationship you had was so incredibly wrong in so many ways, but it just felt so right.

Why did it have to change?

Of course, there were still some hard moments. Even Diane admitted that there were times when she could be irrationally possessive of you, getting angry when someone even looks at you the wrong way. She knew that her possessive, obsessive attitude could scare you, and you would even blame yourself for it, but she didn’t know how to stop. She knew that you were getting scared she would become more difficult to please, like all the other people that have been in your life.

Or the times that you would cry, and it happened so often. You would get sad and Diane would hold you and tell you:

“It’s ok baby, you’re here now, you’re with me. I love you more than life itself. You’re gonna be okay, my little angel.”

One night Diane woke up to you crying into your pillow, and immediately grabbed you.

“What’s wrong, baby? What happened?”

“I- I was afraid that you might- that- one day- you might not want me anymore... what would happen if you d-don’t want me....”

“Listen, I will never not want you. You are all I have, remember? And you’re all I need. Come here, that’s right. You’re my baby, all mine.. shhh....”

Or, there was the time you asked about the scars on Diane’s back. She was mortified, but finally told you about her terrible childhood. The horrible abuse from her mother until her death, the foster home, everything. Her desperation to become the mother she never had. You hugged her tight.

“I’m so sorry, Diane, I had no idea... and to think I complained about-”

“Baby, don’t compare your life to mine. All that matters now is that it’s you and me, and I need to take care of you.”

“Sometimes I think I should be the one taking care of you, Diane.”

“Trust me baby, you do so much more for me than you think.”

Then Diane found it. The rest of the paint thinner. And she was ready to take away all your sadness once and for all, and make you hers forever.

[blossom-hwa]

hi! i really liked your sungyoon fanfiction, light the pyres—apocalypse aus are great. very nervous to ask for your 4th anniv event but could i perhaps get kang yeosang + the title "3 of hearts?" (if anyone reading here knows what show it's from ily!)

hi love! light the pyres is actually one of the works I'm most proud of so it makes me so happy to hear that you liked it! thank you for your request - I'm not sure what 3 of hearts it from lol (maybe one of my followers does), but I hope you still enjoy this!

4 year anniversary drabble game: send me a Stray Kids/The Boyz/Golden Child/Ateez member + a prompt (check out the post for ideas) and I’ll write a drabble for you!

I guess this could be seen as a sort of spinoff of Kingdom (read the series here) - I haven’t posted the next parts yet, but this takes place in the Queendom of Hearts, which is where Checkmate is set :D like Kingdom, it’s heavily inspired by Marissa Meyer’s book “Heartless” - the story of a queen who went mad over love >:)

Uh so TXT Yeonjun is technically here but please don’t take my characterization of him as anything even close to who he is irl.... just think of it as me taking just his name and slapping it on a character I made I’m sorry

~

Title: Three of Hearts

Pairing: Yeosang x gender neutral!reader

Word count: 1.6k

Triggers: mentions of blood and death (semi-graphic)

~

They said you were born under the three of hearts, a spell of kind fortune, a card of good omen. "Your child will be beautiful," the diviner said when she placed you in your mother's arms. "They will love deeply, and in return, they will be loved greatly."

It was a blessed birth for the Kingdom of Hearts, whose rulers, though loved, had not been able to secure an heir for many years. Already the conception of a child was a miracle - to have you born under such an auspicious card only heightened the excitement, cast even more light on a day already filled with laughter and joy. Your parents showered you with love, and as the years passed, you grew in blissful happiness, surrounded by those who adored you. And truly, it seemed you were the three of hearts personified - for with you were two boys, Yeosang and Yeonjun, your best friends, who followed you everywhere you went. 

It was inevitable, then, people whispered, that at least two of you would fall in love. 

At the age of six, seven, ten, even twelve, you could ignore this. You could play the innocent card that came so easily to those born under the three of hearts, bat your eyes and cock your head and ask “What do you mean?” in reply to the questions people asked - do you have a crush? I’m sure you do. It must be on one of the boys you’re always running around with, yes? But as you grew older and the question of to whom you would extend your hand in marriage became increasingly important, your eyes began to fixate on soft blond hair and warm brown eyes, smile widening in the presence of a deep, gentle voice accompanied by the loveliest sparkle in his eyes. 

The traits of a certain best friend and heir to the Kang family fortune. 

He offers a courtship under the flowering wisteria tree just under your window, pale cheeks tinted with blush as he stutters his way through a short confession. Your heart warms, lifts, bursts with joy as you accept with a smiling nod, rejoicing that you have found a match who will love you as much as you love him. Three of hearts, you think giddily - I will be loved as much as I give it.

The stages of courtship seem to pass by all too slowly and at the same time, all too quickly. Caught up in a whirl of fine clothes and presents and ceremonies, you fall asleep every night eager to wake at dawn, if only to see Yeosang’s face the next day. Every moment with him seems too short, and every moment with him feels too long. 

One afternoon under the wisteria tree, you complain of this. Yeosang laughs at your indignation, though when you go to hit his shoulder, he catches your fingers with soft, warm hands, before kissing your forehead gently. “It will be all right,” he murmurs, pulling away just enough for you to see the sparkle in his eyes. “We’ll have a lifetime together, after this.”

A lifetime. Born under the three of hearts, destined for a life of love and happiness, you believed it. 

So much, in fact, that you forget to watch out for the second best friend at your side. 

It never occurred to you to take caution with Yeonjun. He was your best friend. Even upon the announcement of your engagement, he only ever smiled and congratulated the two of you, knocking your heads together teasingly when you got too mushy for his taste. Yeosang even asked him to be one of the groomsmen when the wedding date was set. 

So you never notice the way Yeonjun’s gaze always lingers on you a little too long, the way his eyes darken whenever you place a chaste kiss on Yeosang’s lips. You do notice that he spends more and more time away from you, away from Yeosang as the wedding approaches, but it’s easy to put it down to affairs of the Choi family that you simply aren’t privy to. Perhaps something has gone wrong. Yeonjun would tell you about it in due time, wouldn’t he?

On the night before your wedding, you and Yeosang dance together under a sea of sparkling stars, white engagement outfits shimmering under the night sky. The people cheer. Your parents wipe away tears. You almost cry, too, wrapped in the warmth of Yeosang’s arms around your waist, his eyes smiling into yours. 

You part ways with promises of tomorrow and a lifetime hanging on your lips. When you finally fall asleep, it is to dreams of a beautiful future, complete with Yeosang by your side. 

Instead, you wake up in a world where he is dead.

They say the servant who found the body went mad afterward. You don’t blame them. When you saw the body covered in its rips and stains of red, it felt like a part of your mind simply disappeared. Scrambled. Something. All you could see was the body splashed with blood, unseeing eyes wide open and glassed with the sheen of death. 

And there’s no time to grieve, either, because the next day, the Choi family storms the castle with shouts of a coup and rebellion on their lips. 

All you can do is stare into Yeonjun’s stony expression as he orders the execution of your parents right before your eyes. 

He finds you in your rooms a week later, a beautiful prison of silk and satin that they took away so you wouldn’t hang yourself before he came. His eyes soften upon seeing you, but when he reaches out a hand, you slap it away. 

Only one word leaves your lips. “Why?”

Love, he says. Love for you. Love that burned fierce, hot, so unlike the soft warmth of Yeosang’s hand, love that burned so bright it couldn’t stand to fall second to the gentleness of Yeosang’s smile. His heart burned for you, beat for you, enough to plan all of this, enough to ask, even now - 

“Will you marry me?”

The wisteria tree outside your window is in full bloom under a bright, cloudless sky. A mockery of the day Yeosang asked for your hand and you gave him your heart. 

In the absence of blades and bullets, no one should underestimate the power that fingernails can do to raw skin and bone.

“You worthless, worthless human being,” you snarl, even as guards drag you back from Yeonjun’s bleeding face. “Worthless - worthless - I will never marry you -”

“You will,” Yeonjun snarls back, now a safe distance away from the blood caking your nails. “You will or you will die.”

You don’t die. You almost do, jamming the lock on your door and smashing the fortified window with a superhuman strength you believe Yeosang and your parents have lent you for one night, just one night before leaping into the branches of the wisteria tree, crashing to the ground in a heap of branches and flowers and glass. They nearly catch you - an arrow pierces your shoulder and another streaks so close it almost cuts off your ear - but you escape. And hide. For days, weeks, months...

Until you return with a sword and murder in your eyes, slashing through every guard on your way into the castle until you come across Yeonjun sitting upon your father’s throne, the crown of your family on his head. 

“Would you?” he whispers, the tip of your sword positioned over his heart. “Would you, truly?”

A blank smile curves your lips. “Of course,” you whisper. “Just the same way you would.”

They crown you queen with triumph in their eyes, songs of a royal who avenger their lover’s death when a jealous suitor got in the way. You listen to it with stony eyes and teeth gritted behind your lips, especially when they speak of the three of hearts, blessed above all, destined for a life of love -

There is no love left in your heart that wasn’t taken away with the death of Yeosang and your family.

You execute the Chois. You execute their allies. You root through the kingdom, imprisoning those with even a semblance of a relationship to the man who killed your love, who took the blessing of your card away. The songs die away, replaced by whispers of a queen gone mad with the loss of their love. Triumphant shouts of a blessed three of hearts turn into murmurs of a curse, a new meaning to your card - perhaps not one destined for love, but one whose life will end in tragedy. Pain. Suffering.

They are wrong. Your life was full of love, love that you gave on your own and love that was given by those around you. It was the cause of your happiness and the reason for your suffering - love killed Yeosang and your family, just as it killed the last bit of humanity in you. 

The words of the diviner mock your grief. 

“Your child will be beautiful.”

Not as beautiful as he ever was. 

“They will love deeply.”

Where did that get you? 

“And in return, they will be loved greatly.”

Where did that get him?

No longer do they speak of the three of hearts as a blessing, as a sign of blissful omen. Instead, they speak of it as a curse, a curse of love, a curse of madness, a curse of tragedy to follow at every bend. 

Good. They’re right.

The love that the heavens wrought never brought anything more than pain, anyway.

[wongyuseokie]

Collide | c.s

☆ 18+ minors dni |☀︎fluff | ♕smut | ♥︎ completed

Summary: You run into a handsome stranger who spills his drink on you at a club and offers to clean you up. Word Count:  962 words

Pairing: Choi San x Female Reader Genre/Trope(s)/AU(s): Smut, Fluff, PWP. Content Warnings: None. It’s a PWP, mentions of alcohol and spilling wine.  

Smut Warnings: Unprotected sex (please don’t do this irl). Oral (F receiving), cum licking, body worship sorta. Dirty talk, pet names (kitten). 

Authors Note 1:  This is all Nikki’s fault. Thank you very much to @xpeachesncream for putting this into my head; now I'm suffering. Tagging the lovely @defwoodz, @flurrys-creativity and @here4btsfics who may as well have bullied me into writing an Ateez fic. Authors Note 2: This is completely unplanned but this man won't let me breathe...so here we are. Banner Credits: @classicscreations Cross Posted to AO3

“Fuck!” You groaned when you felt a splash of something wet and cold pour onto your white dress, and you turned up to see the sheepish and handsome smile belonging to the culprit who managed to make your white dress turn into a maroon-stained dress. 

Frankly, you weren’t too mad. This was inevitable, you were in a club, and everyone was packed like sardines. A drink spill was unavoidable. 

“I’m so sorry!” The stranger apologised, and you glared at him. He was ridiculously handsome, with deep dimples and a voice that would make you drop to your knees on any other day. 

“Ugh, it’s fine. I just need to find a way to clean this up,” you mumbled. 

“Sorry I didn't hear you,” the stranger said, inching closer to you. 

“I, uh,” you mumbled, making him grin slightly at you. 

“You aren’t too upset, are you?” The stranger asked. 

“You got me wet,” you mumbled, inching closer to him and muttering your words, inching your lips closer to his ear. 

“Trust me, this isn’t how I’d want to get you wet,” the stranger teased. 

“Oh, so you’d want to get me wet?” You asked, making him grin. 

“Kitten, you’ve been on my mind since I saw you enter the club,” he replied. 

“Oh, so was this on purpose?” You asked. 

“Not at all, but how’s this? I have a room at this hotel. Let’s ditch this place and get you cleaned up?” He proposed. 

You knew you should ask more questions, but he was criminally attractive, and you were soaking wet, not just because of the split drink. 

“One question,” you said. 

“What’s your name?” You asked. 

“San, please don’t forget it,” he answered. 

“I’m Y/N, and why shouldn’t I forget your name?” You asked, and San smirked at you. 

“Because I want to hear you scream my name all night long,” he answered cooly, making you bite your lip. 

“Problem?” He asked with a smirk. 

“Just let’s go,” you rushed, making him smile as he took your hand and guided you out of the crowded club. 

You had just gotten out of the shower and wrapped yourself in a fluffy white towel, and stepped into the master suite, where you saw San waiting for you. You cleared your throat to get his attention. 

“Um, I know I said some things in the club, but you don’t have to do this if you don’t want,” San mumbled. 

“Oh? So all that was just talk?” You teased. 

“Fuck no, it wasn’t,” San grumbled. 

“Then?”

“Lie down, kitten. I have a lot to apologise for,” San instructed, his voice low and husky. You bit your lip as you got onto the bed and lay down. San got off the bed and stripped naked. You drooled at his cock, which was starting to harden. He pulled the towel off you, revealing your naked body to him. 

“I am so fucking sorry,” San apologised as he spread your legs and laid down between them. San started trailing kisses from your inner thighs until he reached your cunt. 

“Let me kiss it better?” San offered. 

“Just fucking do something,” you huffed impatiently, making him smirk as he dove between your thighs. 

San started by running his tongue along your folds, moaning at the taste. He kept running his tongue along your wet cunt. He wrapped his lips around your clit and sucked while his tongue constantly ran over your swollen clit. San gently grazed his teeth against your clit, making you buck your face against his mouth.

“More,” you begged as your head fell back into the bed. San complied, slipped three fingers inside you, and you moaned at the stretch. San moved his three fingers against your pussy and kept hitting against the rough patch of skin inside you. His tongue ran over your clit while his three fingers thrust in and out of you.

“Fuck, San, I want to cum,” you whimpered as he kept fingering and licking you. San moved his fingers faster, and you felt your orgasm wash over you, your thighs threatening to snap shut around San’s head. 

San helped you ride out your orgasm with his fingers and tongue, and you were practically mewling, and you tugged on San’s hair. 

“Mm?” He looked up and smirked when he saw how fucked out you were. He loved that he could do that with just his tongue.

“Fuck me, San,” you said, and San nodded as he hovered over your body, pushing his thick length inside you.

“Fuck you’re so tight,” he groaned, his eyes shutting in pleasure as your cunt clenched around him. 

“You’re so big,” you praised and moaned as he started to move.

“Oh baby, I know,” San boasted, making you slap his chest.

 “Shut up,” you grumbled, making him smile as San moved your legs around his shoulders and fucked you, his mouth coming down to kiss you. “Fuck, I love this pussy,” he praised between as he started to pound into your cunt. 

San’s thrusts started to get more uneven as he reached his orgasm, he reached down and rubbed at your swollen clit, making you cum around his cock, and he came inside you soon after. You moaned when you felt him release his warmth inside you. He removed your legs from his shoulder and moved down your body. His mouth found your cunt, and he licked until he had cleaned your cunt off his release and made you cum twice in the process. 

“Sorry for spilling my drink on you, by the way, ” San said as he lay beside you, pulling you into his chest. 

“It’s okay. I think you more than made up for it,” you giggled, making him smirk. 

“So, round two?” 

[ruby-whistler]

Your c!dream post came on my dash and while I can definitely agree with the main point (torture is wrong no matter who it happens to) some of the contents of that post were a bit bothering to me.

the fact that you implied that your concerned for people who really hate c!dream and therefore see the torture as payback is really crossing a line. I really hope I misinterpreted that because it sounds like your implying that you think those people would dehumanize people in real life. That is a big assumption to make my friend, not something you can just throw around because you see someone talking bad about a character you emphasize with.

And like I said, I’m saying that while agreeing with your main point. I can say that your right about that being something we shouldn’t do while also knowing that this is about a Minecraft roleplay revolving around a character who canonically abused a 17 year old. The accusation your making is not something you should throw around. Just like people shouldn’t accuse Dream apologists who say bad stuff about c!tommy of being real life abuse apologists. There’s a huge difference about being attached to a character and saying something dumb and doing these things irl.

Also I thought we were past referring to lmanburg as colonization? I’m not sure if that’s what you were doing but That’s a real thing that effects people and not something you can just pin on a couple of white streamer men roleplaying. Someone more equipped then me can explain why they are very much not comparable at all, and why it’s bad to compare it, ill probably butcher it. I saw a good post about it somewhere.

And then onto the stuff that’s more story based and doesn’t matter as much:

- dream very much did plan to keep tommy in the prison cell for life, like I’m pretty sure he flat out said it or at least very heavily implied it during the confrontation, someone probably has a clip.

- I can agree that Sam wasn’t manipulated by dream, but he does have trauma from him, in fact it’s a big part of his arc. Dream would brag about what he did to tommy in exile, laughed in his face after killing tommy, and often screamed at him threatening to kill him as well. It affected sam greatly and is what started his spiral.

- There are other things in your post that I disagree with to some extent but honestly debating lore things isn’t what I’m here for. So we can agree to disagree. I’m not really to concerned about the lore stuff.

just like you were talking about being careful about what you are saying about c!dream because it can hurt people, I will also say to be careful in what you say about c!dream in his favor because it can also hurt people. Please do not forget he very canonically abused, murdered, and threatened to murder teenagers. That’s a touchy subject, especially because it was displayed in such a raw manner. Is he deserveing of abuse because of it? Of course not. Is he unworthy of growth or change? Of course not. Does that mean people have to forgive him or like him or sympathize with him? No. No one is morally required to sympathize with a character, as long as your not saying gross things about them. ( like claiming that they deserve torture! )

Someone saying something in the heat of the moment about a character who reminds them of their abuser does not justify calling them real life dehumanizers, or claiming they are prone to it. It’s not cool. And, I and feel like In liking c!dream (or any character who has done something really morally wrong) you have to make sure to be respectful towards people who have been in those situations. You can like a character without excusing their actions. Not saying your doing that, just a blanket statement.

Also, please take care of yourself. If seeing people criticize or say bad things about a character you like is causing you genuine distress, please take a break. I tend to hyperfixate and project and I know that sometimes it can be a really harmful thing. It helps a lot to take a deep breathe and step away for a few minutes. This is a reminder to everyone else as well to always tag crit. And to clarify, I’m not trying to like drag you through the mud for anything I disagree with in your post. Like trust me I get heat of the moment reactions and not completely thinking through everything you write down. And just blatantly not knowing that something isn’t cool to say. I just want to make sure it’s known that hey, maybe people shouldn’t say _.

If there’s anything in my post that’s wrong I apologize, I’m open to respectful criticism. And also just to finish this off, I know getting critical asks can be upsetting, so if you are genuinely made upset, angry, or anxious by this ask, please just leave it be. Don’t respond, or take a breather before you do. I’m saying this because like I said I just came across this post, I don’t know you or how you tend to react to things so I don’t want to start a huge thing. Just giving my thoughts and crit.

And also because having people yell/be really rude at me makes me very genuinely anxious! Even if it’s anon. Please keep that in mind if you respond (you don’t have to, it’s up to you) You can respond and disagree however much you like, just please don’t be a jerk about it cause I’ll probably cry lol (seriously tho like I said I’m sensitive)

Alright, so first as a quick disclaimer, I’m going to out a summary of the original post’s points, just to ensure that we’re on the same page;

The post does say:

- don’t dehumanize c!Dream because it continuously hurts people who relate to and/or sympathize with him, also dehumanization in general is an inherently wrong mindset

- don’t attack people who sympathize with him because he’s a victim of abuse besides other things

The post never says:

- you cannot hate c!Dream and not sympathizing with him is wrong

- the things c!Dream has done are to any degree excused

- don’t dehumanize c!Dream because he’s a good person

- people who dehumanize c!Dream are real life abuse apologists

If you read the post and didn’t get these points from it, i advise you to reread it as I made pretty much all of these abundantly clear.

I absolutely never said anything about real life abuse apologism. I continuously put (fictional) in front of things to make that point. I don’t know how you got that from the post.

Dehumanization is wrong. Dehumanization of fictional characters on a large scale to the point where people will excuse his abuse is wrong and it hurts people and I will speak out about it. It doesn’t mean people will dehumanize people irl or that they are prone to it, but it’s still wrong.

I never said L’manberg was colonization. I said some people who have had their country colonized relate to him because he had his home torn apart and is desperate to return it back to its original state. This is a completely valid reason to relate to him as it is a pretty big part of the character.

He said he would “put him in the prison”. I don’t remember him saying it would be forever, but he could’ve said that, however I’d like a clip first. He never said he would be stored in the inhumane, main cell, and it makes a lot more sense that he wouldn’t be in there 1) because Dream said it was only a security measure 2) the prisoner was supposed to be able to move around the prison.

I don’t care that the abuser was “traumatized” by the abuse victim telling him of his actions. If I was being tortured mentally and mistreated and neglected physically by a person who hates my guts for weeks I too would probably threaten him. It didn’t start his spiral. His spiral was caused by corruption and possibly hatred, not being “hurt” by c!Dream. c!Dream didn’t cause himself to be abused, that was fully c!Sam’s decision, and saying otherwise is victim blaming (not saying you did that, just putting this point out here).

I do not forget the bad things he’s done. I was there. I saw it. I hated him for it. I still sympathize with him. I still believe he deserves better. I still believe he deserves to get better. I 100% agree with the point that it’s wrong to say someone is required to feel sympathy, as long as they don’t dehumanize him and harass people who do. That was the literal point of the post.

I am one of the many c!Dream fans who get constantly triggered because of how overwhelming the dehumanization is in the community. It’s not being hypersensitive, and I really hope you’re not implying that. It’s a very real issue that should be solved so that people don’t have to “take breaks” because of it.

I don’t care if people hate him or criticize him. I genuinely couldn’t care less. He did disgusting things. I’m used to it. But it is normalized in the community to say stuff about the character that is genuinely triggering, and would be to anyone if people were saying it on a large scale about their favorite character.

Hope this didn’t come off as too aggressive, I have anxiety and I didn’t want to let my feelings bleed into this because that wouldn’t be good for me. Wish you a nice day.

[little-precious-baby]

This 2020...

First of all, I know most of the people did this many days ago but I thought today was like the best for me to say goodbye to this year.

Not to mention that this year has been very difficult, not only for me but for everyone. A pandemic that brought us many changes of which many are not yet comfortable and is understandable. In my case, in this year I have been able to understand many things, I have suffered and had to face other problems, and of course, I enjoyed important moments with my friends and family. My first decision this year I remember was cutting off my bangs without my parents' permission. I was scolded for weeks, even months and yes, I accept that seeing that picture from the first day of the school year is going to haunt me for a long time but I don't regret what I did. Is not a secret that for many of my irl friends, I'm like a little child that needs attention because if you give me your back, probably I'll be cutting my hair or even doing something worse.

As for emotional and friendship issues... I have to admit that I broke friendships in a non-gentle way, there were also discussions over totally stupid topics and not to mention love issues that simply ended up being a failure—a waste of time, to be honest.

While it hasn't been such an easy year, there's something I still don't even regret doing: coming here to Tumblr. My previous account has many years to created here —probably in 2017— however, at that time I didn't try to search much as I got to do this year and I'm glad I did because I met great people. Sadly I doubt at some point to meet you in person, but I hope you keep in mind that you make my days happier with your comments or just being you. I hope our friendship continues and that you all don't get sick of me so easily. Also, I wish you all the best as I know each of you is talented and has the ability to succeed in your lives. <3

Uh, the paragraphs 👉🏼👈🏼

Also I want you to know that this isn't in an specific order and that I hope you don't feel bad with my words.

💙 - @latte-fairytaekwoon

How can I start this without you rejecting my love? <3 You were one of the first people I decided to approach. I remember reading one or two of your works and just thinking "Wow, she writes very well... I'm going to follow her; it's going to be fun and interesting." I was planning not to talk to you at the beginning, to be honest. My end in mind was just to read what you updated and since you were the third account with content I had decided to follow, I thought it was a good plan. But one thing led to another and I decided to talk to you —which you probably regret since I bother you a lot lmao— and yeah, that's how we met and still talk to each other. I also need to mention that whenever I tried to talk to you about my problems or things that overwhelmed me, you always knew what to say to me even if that included to scold me. You always made me come to my senses. Many times I mentioned to you that you were like a mother to me as you "gave me those vibes" but how can you not? While you don't usually show so much affection through direct words of "I love you" "I care you," I feel them when you advise me. It's going to sound too idk, but I really don't regret to met you, Kitty. This looks like a bible and words repeating over and over again but how to show you that I appreciate, admire and love you if I always try to let you know? At this point if you still think I don't care of you, you are dumb 💖 By the way, it's worth mentioning that you and I have a long path together and you'll continue to be attacked with my love, support and jokes. I love you, mom 😗💙

💖 @winterviolet1

To be honest, I feel bad for not remembering how we started talking... I don't remember if I followed you first or if it was the other way around but hey, let's look on the bright side, it was fun to have met you and come together to always annoy Sofie with Hongjoong gifs <3 I hope we can still be little demons together and please, PLEASE, stop killing me 💀 I love when you send me gifs of Jongho because wow, that boy is definitely a daddy and more when he dances —I refuse to deviate from the subject but he jdudbd— but yeah, he kills me even when he just smiles. My point is that when I see those gifs, I went into a state where my mind goes to places that is better not to mention and I blush because yeah, we talk about my bias isbdkddj and I also frustrate because I find myself unable to return the same treatment to you dkdnskd. Ps: Let me know when we'll be demons again <3

💖 @teeztheflag

Your reactions are idejdindd art I feel shy as I know I never got to create a bond big enough to make you call my friend or that you consider me your friend but hey, it was great to talk to you. <3

Atte: the Slyffindor Girl 💀

💖 @twancingyunhoe

ALLYSSA 🥺 Okay, okay, just mention your name and I'll get in cute mode. I remember following you, yet I hadn't dared talk to you much. The safest thing I'd ever said to you was "Hello! I walk by giving love and support!" for days later asking if you were going to adopt me to have adopted Gabby as my sister 🥺 You're a beautiful person who has such a big, beautiful heart that makes me soft. I know I haven't exchanged many words with you this past month, but I hope that's not going to affect the fact that you're important to me. Thank you for accepting me, giving me love and always being so pretty. <3 kith kith

💖 @tinkerbellwoo

You are such a gift to me diejsndis. Since the first time I knew you, you were very kind and lovely to me. You won a part of my heart with your kindness and yeah, I do remember going to your asks and just "Hey, here is a bunch of love from me to you ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ Also I hope we can be friends" kejebskssi. That was like my way to ask to be one of your closer moots because you were just so cool and I wanted to be friends with the wonderful person I saw had interactions with some of my moots. I'm sorry because I have time without actually having a large conversation with you and is completely my fault... I hope this new year will change that and I can talk more to you 🥺💖

💖 @yungidreamer

My older sister :( I'm so happy I had the opportunity to talk to you 👉🏼👈🏼 I still don't forget that you once used the dissapointed card with meeee, your little cute princess angel baby sister. I have cero regrets welcome you into my big, not normal, Tumblr family because yeah, probable we aren't the same but at the same time we are the same, if you know what I mean 👀 I hope we can have more conversations between each other because I know is very interesting to talk to you but at the same time I'm so shy :(

💖 @yunderland / @shangri-woo

How can I began this? Ksbsdusbs First, I need ti be honest. I do have my thirst times and well, I read many of your works in ghost mode 👉🏼👈🏼 I was kinda shy to just idk, interact kdidbdkd. Also I began to see you interact with Amelie and was funny and I began to think "What happens if I do try to be friends with her?" but also "What if she doesn't like how I am? I ccan be a bother some times...". And yeah, I was thinking that for maybe two days until I decided to make a move. I followed you and I said "Hi 👉🏼👈🏼 I saw you talking with Amelie... You seem like a kind and lovely person, mind if I try being friends with you?" skdbsudbdks. I. Will. Not. Regret. Talking. To. You. You are such a good person :( Every time we talk, you are just so attentive that makes me soft. Please, keeo being my friend :( even if you don't consider me as your friend :(

💖 @ursaurora

Well, I don't have that much to say because I just said hi while being in hiatus but hey, I really really like the idea of being friends with you. This doesn't stopped me to wish you a good New Year and hey, why not hoping to have a good relationship between each other? <3

💖 @illicit-roses

Rosa xkenskd you sidjdndid are isbddkdj a ksudkdid baby. Such a beautiful, sweet, kind and big hearted baby. I was also the first one to talk to you and I was the one that began being surprised by your words isbwkdz. Not to mention that I also got shy and touched by your words. In this year, I would love to be more close to youuuuuu <3

💖 @inkigayeo / @woo-san

Vivi, I don't know if you will read this so probably if you do, is because I told you in private kxjsksdnsk. I don't feel like remembering you how I began talking to you because you asked and I already told you that but something I for sure need you to know is that... I'm still very touched by your encouraging words to me. I think our first first conversation was about me being depressed and how I was feeling toward myself, then about my admission test that hey, you did amazing with your words. I remember I cried because yeah, I was anxious but you told me a great advice. And when I didn't do well on that an also began saying sorry to you for not doing well, you gave me anither good words that hey... How not be in love with Vivi? Vivi is just a Queen with a big heart and kindness to give to everyone :(( <3

💖 @atinyedits / @atinywrites

My lovely and beautiful Anrose kdbdkzkzd I remember I began to talk to you after I saw a post of Cottons talking about how you were such a fk rat brat and my first thought was "Hey, I want to be her friend" lol. And guess what? That's what I did isbszlxudbzk I went to your asks and I asked you if you wanted to be my friend and you accepted. We began talking and I began having this love to you idbesldjdbs. But something I do need to make clear is that I didn't thought you will be part of my Tumblr family as my mom kdjdsldudhs I still remember reblogging with an "you are married with Allyssa?! She is my mooooom" and yeah, you were welcome to a natural habit of a family who is thirsty 24/7 for Ateez or each other and yeah, such a triangle live attraction and the foughts you still have with my other mom kdisjsnd. But I hope you feel the love I have for you. Because I do love you and I trust you enough. Don't you remember how I send you photos of my body? I do feel insecure about it and still regret to be being called a Queen but yeah, I trust and love you enough, my Anrose <3

💖 @atiny-ahgase

Gabby, my sweetest sister 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 How can I began this? Well... Not to mention that I usually read your interactions with Zad and as I wasn't someone you knew, I was scared to talk to both of you. You because I was mostly shy and for Zad because I thought he was intimidating, funny, right? Well, I'm not sure if I do told you about giving you tons of love and support directly but I do remember adopting Zad as my brother and he telling me he had a sister and my first thought was "Hey, why I can't have a big sister too?" and then I began talking to you and with what I was welcomed? By tons of love and cute gifs of kisses and hugs. You make me feel lovved, Gabby. You are such an angel 🥺 Please, don't stop loving your baby sister Mei <3

💖 @shinyddeonghwa

Omg, omg, omg. I feel bad because I don't even know how I began talking to you T^T I feel bad to admit that I get confused between you and Treasure and ksbsizbdsis I think it was with you that I talked in Portuguese jzusnsks and if not, I'm sorry for the miss understanding ksisjs T^T but something I for sure remember if you trying to dom me and then getting flustered when that didn't worked and it was my time then isnwishsslsns I also need to mention that is always cute everything you do dkdbskzusks even how you talk to me <3 I hope our friendship can last for more time <3

💖 @sansbun & @choisans-dimples

Bun and Cass, the brat in denial 👀😗, the sweetest babies I have met. Two lovely babies that love cats and San. I think my first interaction with the both of you was because of the Tumblr family. Bun, I'm sorry for not talking too much to you. You are such a kind person and I would like to be closer to you in this new year. And for Cass, we talked more in discord but still wasn't that much :( But it was actually funny to see you fighting with Mari, it was cute nsisnslds. I hope both of you know that your auntie loves you so much <3

💖 @galaxteez

ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH <3

Our first conversation was something thirsty, I'm 100% sure about that. And how to forget how I always forgot to turn on to be anon siwnsibddk8dn. But I'm still sure you loved to see my asks while me being anon than when it was actually me because mine was just cute, giving tons of love to you when my anon... Well... My anon 😗 I know I have time without having thisty talks with you so maybe this new year will mark the difference 👀 <3

💖 @ateezstanlove

Ndyensiddhsihssjwj here is when my mind is having problems to remember how I actually met everyone and that's making me feel bad skdbwksjzns but something I can be 100% is that I tried really hard every day to make you feel all the love I can give. I still remember when I saw you were on hiatus and thinking about leaving Tumblr. Being honest, I was really sad but hey, you are here now to receive all my love and have those lustful thoughts about Wooyoung's thighs —I saw that, sis 😗. But yeah sksnqisndks. I love you and I hope we can have more time as sisters this year <3

💖 @ateez-little-star

Jas, the beautiful star in the sky 🥺 You were actually my first sister in my Tumblr Family. I still think is funny how I try really hard to baby you but at the end is in the other way, you end baby me skjssksisns 🥺🥺🥺🥺 How can I be more grateful to met you, uh? You always listened to my problems and I do considered a lot your opinions, is very kind to talk to you. I feel always loved when I talk to you. Also not to mention how I felt when during the night you left and when I searched you, you were gone. I was really sad and my first thought was "If she doesn't come back... She will remember me?" ksudisbskd but in days you came back and I was so happy :(( Please don't leave me again, Jas :( You are very soecial to me, my baby sis 🥺💖

💖 @hiatus-kittenmbb

Msisnsiddn MU AUNTIE HERE, EVERYONE. MSIWBSKDJDSBSB I want your love, cuddles, kisses and all the things you can give me and I'll make sure to make you feel the same, with tons of love <3 Not to mention how funny is to talk to you and all the times you told me to bother Kitty mom hahaha such a good and lovely relationship both of you have hahaha. Ps:Don't forget I love you so much, Auntie <3

💖 @hwastreasure

Mia :( I'm sorry because I don't have many things to say but at the same time I don't want you to feel sad about it. I remember I told you I will talk constantly to you and I didn't do it. Please forgive me :(( Can we try again and be closer now? :(

💖 @hongjoong-a-holic

SOFIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-.... Oh, no. My mistake. Let me try again. MY LIL LIOOOOOOOOOOOON GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR~. I don't have a lot of words how to describe the love and affection I have for you. You were always paying attention to me and giving me love —not to mention that you told me I needed to hug you just because you wanted nsisns and I say no lol— and that's cute sksnsksis. I also want to say that all those times that I do bother you with Blue about gifs of Ateez dancing sexily and those smuts and all that explication of sexuality... I have cero regrets! :D lmao. If you really thought I will say sorry about that, is a nono. I know you love it at the end lmao. But there is something I for sure need to be sorry... I know you were sad about me leaving ti be on hiatus and I still did but baby, I really needed to do it. I promise I'll be back soon. Very soon, just wait for me <3

💖 @hwaberrykiwi

Cam, Cam, Cam, Cam :(( I began to talking to you thanks to Jas that she asked me if I knew you and I said no and she just make me talk to you and guess what? I'm happy she did that because hey, I met an amazing person. And even if we didn't talked that much, something my heart will not forget are the words you told me when I said Uw as going on hiatus. I was really touched, I cried. I really did at the end but yeah. I would love to be more close to such a person with a big big heart <3

💖 @joongieblue

I don't even know how to began this because I think everything I need you to know, you already know it but at the same time I feel like I still need to say a lot :(( I don't want you to feel less as a person anymore... I know you said that way of thinking is because of your depression but baby, try to look at the amazing people who are with you, that cares about how you are and of course you are very important to them. You are very sweet and amazing as a person, let me tell you that I see in you a soft light. A very pure light that needs to shine bright in the sky but the darkness is making her feel like a insuficient and lonely light. Don't worry, things will get better soon. Trust me <3

💖 @seonghwa-is-babie

How can I began this without this looking awkward? 👉🏼👈🏼 I met you thanks to Zad and what I learned is that you were such a good, kind and shy boy but of course I still think you can be very intimidating if you want to. I'm sorry for not having a lot of conversation with you since I met you but I promise I'll try harder to be close to you. Of course, if you don't mind <3

🧡 - @seacottons

How can I began this?... The first time I talked to you, it was me trying to tease you really bad. I can also remember I told you to cald me kitten or something like that at that moment and the next thing we talked was about how I wanted to be adooted by you so bad isnsldks I don't regret doing all what you wanted me to do so you can adopt me because hey, you are amazing, wonderful as my other mom. Talking to you is like a way to calm my insecurities and stress I had during the day. You always giving love to me and even those cute hugs in the head you give or when you are too much sleepy to even type correctly iwjeneid you are such a baby :(( I'm still sorry for the time I called you a rouch, you aren't a bug... You are a beautiful, sweet, kind Queen I have the posibility to call mom. Not to mention that you are also my sweet, cool pumpkin —favorite— mom. Also, I can remember all those times you told me to bother or kick Kitty just because "she need it" dkbsskdjd the time you also wanted to disown me dibedidnzsj Leaving that topic to say cute things I love about you again is that... I'll be forever happy and gratefull with you. You gave me great advice when I needed them the most. You gave me a shoulder and a soft comfortable place to talk about my deep problems, my insomnia, depression, all of that. Thank you, mom. Thank you so much for letting me be part of your life and of course, youre mine. I will not share with Kitty <3

💖 @jongpleasure

My lovely, sweet and innocent twin ^^ lmao, we know we both are like really really twins. Our birthdays are very close, we both are Cancers, have the same bias that we share with each other because damn, he is really nice. But hey, is still very good to know you because you are talented, really really talented. The videos you create are wonderful and I am not saying that just because I know you, they are very good. The same with your fics, are amazing. You are an amazing writer, why you can't see that, uh? Want me to kiss your cheeks and hug you hard till you learn it? If you do want it, you are free to come to me and I'l give ut to you because msidbwks you are my lovely twin that I love so much. Have a great new year, I hope all your problems get resolved and you can noticed how you are talented enough to succeed and that you have friends in here that love you so bad. Kyra, my sweet twin I love so much <3

🕷️🕸️ - @yunhoshoe / @jonghoshoe

Aw, my baby prince Zad :(( The one I can trully see as a baby even when you are such a year younger than me. I want to protect you every time, even when I know I can't do that much virtually... So everytime I need to make me feel that I gave you all the love I can give and hope you can feel all the love I try to give you every time we talk. I'm still sorry for that time I make you feel uncomfortable with my missunderstanding about spiders and all of that... I'm also sorry for that time I send you gifs about dogs when you were scared of them... I'm really sorry, baby. Your big sister is dumb many times but hey, she is also still learning and want to give all she can to you. I hope this new year, we cab still be closer. Who is my little sweet, cute baby prince? Of course, you <3

💖 @xiuminswifeforever

I know we aren't that close, sadly. I follow you on twitter and here and everytime we talk is probably you being horny and wanting to have sex or somethung with your hmm... Is funny to talk to you and I know you told me that you are mostly in twitter and that was why we don't talk that much but hey, I would love to talk more with you. Want to try in this new year? <3

💜 - @yunhoiseyecandy

My sweet angel Violet :(( HoW I can began this? Kdsndid I don't remember very well how I began talking to you... Like I try really hard to remember how I began talking to you and my mind is in blank siwnsksus I'm sorry because of that but at the same time, is the good memories that are important to remember, right? How can I not be feeling grateful with the angel that with some kind words that came from her heart, made me a crying mess because of how touched I was? :(( There are many things I know I will not forget. That time I was feeling low beecause someone was just being very mean with me and you were protective, your kind words when I was just losing my mind and feeling all that pain inside and you helped me release that... For this year, I hope we can still be friends because you are amazing and I don't want to lose you :( <3

💖 @treasure-hwa

I feel really bad if I began saying this but I do want to say the truth and the truth is that I usually get confused between shinnyddeonhwa because you both had/have Hwa in their profiles and I know you both don't even write in the same way but idk, is easily for me to get confused, I'm sorry T^T Changing the subject, I really loved that time when we began talking in Portuguese and Spanish at the same time. Was really funny to even think how everyone would saw that ksjsnskdd Also I am very touched and happy when you roleplay with me... You are very sweet even while roleplaying and that makes me soft in such a way dksbskdid I would like to roleplay again with you, only if you want to any other time 👉🏼👈🏼 Also in this new year, I hope we can still be talking to each other for a long time, sister <3

💖 @cometoceantrenches

Not me being speechless every time I began writing a paragraph kwusnekdid also not me becoming your friend the second you asked me how was the relationship between Cottons and I 👉🏼👈🏼 But look at the good side, we are sisters now and guess what? I noticed how you have a big BIG heart and all the love you can give is just so cute when I receive it or just read it. I hope in this new year we can make new and memorable conversations together. Don't forget you have an special space in my heart <3

🤍 - @vocalyunho

Amelie, my sweet and lovely wife :(( How can I began this? I remember the first time I talked to you. I said your writing skills were amazing and that you were cute and I wanted to try being your friend. Not to mention that two days later I ask you to be my wife dkebdidbdkd But I don't regret that at all. I'm really happy I met you because every time I talk to you, I feel in a safe space... A place I can say how I really feel without being judged... And what do I receive every time I talk my problems out? Sweet words and advice :(( Amelie you are such a good girl, a good advicer and an amazing friend. Thank you so much for letting me be your friend. I know I won something big with your beautiful friendship. Also I know that you have problems and stress but hey, as you said, things hopefully will get better, we just need to be patient and wait. And don't forget that you can come to me everytime you want. I'll be here for you, Amelie. Anlso in this new year, I hope our friendship can grow bigger and yeah, why not trying to create new memories together? Remember you are Yunho of our 2Ho. Love you <3

💖 @sollyho & @ateezinmymind

Well... Maybe this will look like a very short paragraph but... I felt bad at the same time because I don't have that much to say... For sure, I'm happy I met both of you because during our conversations, I can deduce that I can trust you because you are lovely and all of that. What I regret so bad is that during this 2020, I didn't talked that much and that's why I feel bad for not writing something big but please, don't feel that I don't care about you because I do :(( i hope in this new year, we can talk much and maybe be close friends 👉🏼👈🏼

👑 - @barnesbabee

Queen Trixie 👉🏼👈🏼 Well, what I can say is that first, I love your humor keiwbsnd also that everytime you tive your opinion about something, you have valid points. This will sound stupid but I do really like to read when you post something. As I said some days ago in your dm, I really would like to be close to you but at the same time I do feel like that will not occur or will not happen that easily because I am not that cool and well, I don't know, I feel like I would be that kind of person you would dislike easily. Something I promised this year and will keep till this new year is the tonw of love I give to you and the support you need as a powerful queen. <3

💖 @multidreams-and-desires

My baby sis that I love so much, always taking care of me ane telling me how much you love me :(( this year was amazing. Probably our talks are mostly about problems or just giving each other love. I'm happy that I met you because you are always kind and of course you have also those thirsty moments that all our Tumblr family have —that's why we all get along, we are a bunch of people that have Ateez as their weakness lol. Also, I need to mention that in this new year, you need to know that I'll be giving you more love so just wait for me <3

💖 @msmadness99

Seven, my lovely Seven ^^ First of all I need to mention the iconic moment we both noticed we talked in Spanish after months of always talking on English lol. I know some of your insecurities about your writings and I still want to let you know that when I say that your works are amazing, well written and calls the attention easily, I'm being honest and saying that not as your friend, I say that as a fan of your works. I don't know who tells you or makes you feel insecure about them but hey, is amazing. Even those short things you write and don't get me started with Break Out serie siendjdbdkdys Every time you update, you make me have my heart in my throat kduebwdkd You are very talented, don't let others make you think other way. I love you, Seven <3

I think that is all 👉🏼👈🏼

I hope you all receive this new year with a smile and always being positive ❤️

I’m so grateful for your support and love this year. May you have a prosperous, happy and healthy New Year.

May all your dreams come true in 2021! You got this!❤️

[tsukihimeyfan]

Sozin’s Comet’s Deus Ex Machina (and ways to fix them)

I’m sure that most of us AtLA fans can agree that the four part Finale was one of the best moments in animation history, with astoundingly well choreographed fight scenes, fantastic emotional beats, gorgeous animation, and frankly breath-taking music. However, I’m also sure I’m not the only one who was frustrated by one aspect of it in particular, the one blot on an otherwise perfect finale: what I like to call the “lion-turtle and pointy rock” ex machina.

The saddest part is that there was very little they had to change to get to a satisfactory, ties-everything-together ending. For example, take Energy-bending and the Lion-turtle. I saw a post a while ago where they suggested that energybending could’ve been related to what Aang learned from the swamp and the Guru, and it just makes SO much sense (Note: I saw the post months ago and I can’t find it anymore, so if anyone knows who first posted that theory please let me know so that I can give credit where credit’s due). After all, Aang seemed to use the energy of the swamp to sense where Appa and Momo were, and later, during Appa’s Lost Days, Guru Pathik says this:

Meaning he, a non-bender, is capable of reading the energy of others, and of locating people bonded to them from miles away. Let’s not forget that he had also previously sensed everything Appa had gone through with the same ability. Sounds like a really useful skill, wouldn’t you say?

Also, looking at both “sensing” occurrences, they look remarkably similar, so we can be reasonably sure that they’re both employing the same method.

It would’ve been so easy to have Aang take a moment to ask how Guru Pathik met Appa. After all, as far as the Gaang knew, Appa was taken by merchants to be sold in Ba Sing Se, so he shouldn’t have had a chance to meet anyone at the Eastern Air Temple. Did the merchants pass through the temple on the way to Ba Sing Se? Did the Guru try to set Appa free? Pathik would then have to explain how Appa had already escaped on his own, and he helped him find Aang by reading his energy. Aang could then ask the Guru to teach him this ability so that if they ever get separated again he’d be able to find and help Appa easily. Boom - energybending basics acquired.

A highly spiritual person like Aang would no doubt have little problems mastering the sensing ability, especially since he’s used a limited version of it before at the Swamp. Also, if we think about how much the spiritual mentors in the show have tried to drill it into Aang that all things are connected,

we can assume that after mastering everything Guru Pathik could do he would eventually be able to sense even people vaguely connected to him from far away. Being the Avatar, the bridge between the spiritual and physical worlds, would almost certainly also help him master energysensing abilities no other had before. 

Maybe they could’ve added a few 30 second scenes here and there of Aang meditating to hone his energysensing skills. Also, during the whole Boiling Rock debacle, imagine how great it would’ve been if Sokka had asked Aang about his dad and, after pressing his hand to Sokka’s forehead and following his bond to his father, Aang was able to tell him that his dad was alive and well, and that he was somewhere in the direction they’d come from, though at that point he wouldn’t be able to pinpoint his exact location.

“I’m sorry Sokka... I can’t tell exactly where he is yet... I know that’s not really helpful...”

“No, knowing he’s alright is plenty. Thanks, buddy”

After Sokka and Zuko rescue Hakoda, I could picture Aang practicing harder than ever until he could use Hakoda’s bond to Bato and the others to locate them in a prison in Caldera City (which would’ve made rescue before ending the war difficult to say the least, and would explain how they were all there for Zuko’s coronation so fast)

Later, during Aang’s trip to the mysterious island, it would’ve been so cool if, instead of handing him the ability, the lion-turtle just told him this:

... and maybe showed him visions of his energysensing training when he did the forehead-touch thing. Then, during the battle with Ozai, maybe after redirecting the lightning away from Ozai Aang could think to himself “I can’t... he may be a monster, but he’s still my friend’s father!”. Then, he suddenly realizes that just like with his friends and family, Aang has a connection with Ozai too, and that if sensing someone’s energy happens by putting a bit of his energy into them, maybe he can use the same route to take some of Ozai’s energy away from him.

Imagine how amazing it would’ve been if they’d added those little snippets of Aang’s energybending training all throughout book 3, without giving it that name, and then Aang used what he’d learned from Guru Pathik and Huu and what he’d taught himself to rediscover a technique that hadn’t been used in millenia all by himself! (well, with a little “nudge in the right direction” from lionturtle-sensei) We were SO close, all the building blocks were there but... *sigh* we ended up still so far. 

Continued with solving “pointy-rock-ex-machina” under the cut

In Book 2, we’re told that to master the Avatar State Aang has to “let go of his attachments”, but that plot point is dropped completely and all he has to do is get hit in his lightning scar and BAM! Avatar State unlocked, no letting go required! 😒 

He was still just as attached to Katara as he was during Book 2, if not more so. So, in the interest of trying to figure out how to tie up as many loose ends as possible, we could try to hit two birds with one stone by fixing another thing at the same time that wasn’t addressed either. 

We could start with a conversation between Aang and Katara where he apologizes for kissing her when she clearly didn’t want him to at some point during Sozin’s Comet Part 1 - The Phoenix King.

“I accept your apology Aang” Katara’d say, “but from now on make sure to respect people’s boundaries, Ok? Especially girls’ boundaries :) We can talk about this more after everything’s over”

At this point, maybe Aang could be left to think and reflect on his relationship with Katara, on his attachment to her, and on how he’d started thinking about her as “his” almost without any input from her.

Maybe Aang could begin to really understand what Guru Pathik was trying to teach him when he said “you must let go”, and the difference between love and unhealthy attachment to people.

He’d therefore be going into the fight with Ozai with that fresh on his mind.

Then, as the battle raged and he grew increasingly desperate, maybe he’d try a few times to force himself into the Avatar State only to fail miserably. 

At this moment

when he’s been overpowered and cornered (and also has a little bit of “downtime” to think), he could start desperately trying to figure out a way to enter the Avatar State, and wondering why he can’t do it. Katara’s been healing him every day! The scar doesn’t even hurt anymore! Why doesn’t it work???

Then, he'd realize that it doesn’t really make sense for a lightning strike to lock his 7th Chakra, since according to what Guru Pathik taught him chakras are locked or unlocked through changes in emotional and spiritual state, not physical. 

(Note: this is also backed up by what little I know of irl chakras and activating Kundalini in the Yoga school of Hindu philosophy. If anyone knows more about it please feel free to add to this or correct me. I’d love to learn how the concept of chakras in Avatar contrasts with its real life counterpart 😊)

Also, if the lightning had messed with the Avatar State some other way, like by blocking his chi for example, he shouldn’t be able to bend properly either.

So what could’ve caused his problem with the Avatar State? 

Of course! After Katara saved him, Aang became even more focused on gaining her love, and grew even more attached to her than he’d been before! Of course he can’t enter the Avatar State! 

Now, I’m a Zutara shipper all the way, and this would work much better if that had been canon, but this could work even with a Kataang endgame since, as I said before, Aang kind of become obsessed with the idea of making Katara “his” no matter what, a clear earthly attachment, instead of loving her unselfishly and letting her love him in her way:

Notice that he said “we kissed” even though he kissed her, and then “I thought we were gonna be together”, an assumption he made without asking her anything once. Same as in this scene:

Mastering the Avatar State doesn’t mean not loving anyone romantically, as we can clearly see through Avatar Roku’s example (also the “if you want power abandon your loved ones” message is stupid and I don’t like it at all. This would be better imo)

Even during the process for unlocking the chakras, the Fourth Chakra tells us that finding love isn’t contrary to spirituality, and can even be a source of spiritual strength. However, I’ve always thought it was a bit strange that the “new love” Aang found to fill the hole left by the deaths of his people was.... just Katara

Because what Aang lost was essentially all of his family and friends right? So wouldn’t it have made more sense for Aang to envision Sokka, Toph, Appa and Momo as well? You know, his old family vs. his new family?

I didn’t fully understand what exactly was wrong with it until I read some of tumblr user marsreds’ metas on the matter, and I have to agree with them that it seems Aang was sort of focusing on his love for Katara so much partially as a way to cope with the loss of his people. To keep it out of mind. That’s not how you build a wholesome romantic relationship, and it doesn’t seem like the best way to deal with grief either. No wonder his Seventh Chakra was blocked.

I would’ve loved to see Aang realize at the moment of truth that in order to access the Avatar State he simply had to let Katara go enough so that he could love her selflessly, so that her wants and needs, and the needs of the world, could come first. He needed to become able to accept her answer, whatever it was, when she gave it. He needed to come to understand that his happiness wasn’t completely (or even mostly) dependent on getting into a relationship with Katara. He had a family he’d found all on his own, made up of friends who adored him and who would’ve given their lives for him if necessary. He was not alone in the world any more. Even if she told him no, he would in all likelihood find new love and be happy.

(in fact we have proof and there’s a perfect candidate right there in the Fire Nation but I digress)

The rest of the finale could’ve played out exactly the same as canon, and in the end Aang would’ve had a better understanding of himself and some inner peace. They could’ve also given us an inkling that Aang would later get to mourn over the deaths of his people properly, surrounded by his loved ones (maybe, ideally, in a hypothetical Book 4-AIR?. God, I wish)

I’ve seen some posts about Aang letting go of his attachment to the Air Nomad’s teachings instead (with maybe that very decision to put the needs of the world above his own being what unlocks his Seventh Chakra), and those are magnificent ideas as well, but I myself would’ve preferred if it went this way because I think there’s something beautifully poetic and satisfying about Aang staying true to himself, finding an alternate solution to violence that would still protect the world, and using the wisdom of His People to put an end to the very war that caused their destruction, while simultaneously giving the worst possible punishment to a man as power-hungry as Ozai

...and leaving him the same way he’s left many of the Fire Nation’s victims in the past: trapped, powerless and forgotten.

I also feel like this ties up all the loose ends better, since it was his attachment to Katara specifically which stopped him from mastering the Avatar State in the first place. And, Kataang endgame or not, it would’ve sent a wonderful message about building and maintaining healthy relationships, perfect for the show’s target audience of preteen and teenage kids.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk

[kryativelogos]

Lukanette is the Ideal Ship (for now) Here’s Why

Hi before, anyone gets mad at me - I still think Adrienette is endgame, but with the information we have right now, I’m really rooting for Luka atm. I’m not hating on anybody’s ship, ya’ll can ship whoever you want with whoever you choose. This is just an analysis considering the plot and the characters within the show. So this post is strictly analytical and I’m going to do my best to keep the bias down to a minimum.

We all know Luka was created as a love triangle for Marinette. Like the first time we’re introduced to him (Captain Hardrock, S2Ep13) Alya was already all up in Marinette’s business meaning the show wanted us to consider him as a love interest. I mean she was infatuated with him the moment she saw him, she straight up stammers like she did with Adrien. We also see him making fun of Marinette afterwards, which is similar to when Adrien laughed at Marinette during the umbrella scene (Origins PII, S1Ep26). There a few more key similarities between the two main love interests which is just more confirmation that this was intentional. The show wanted more drama in our superheroes civilian lives because let’s be honest, Marinette stumbling around trying to get Adrien’s attention was getting a little old.

Now let’s actually talk about why I believe Luka is better suited for Marinette (again, for now, because we all know Adrien and Marinette were made for each other). We’ve all read the fanfictions, Marinette is just overall clumsy and shy irl vs her superhero persona, this isn’t something that can be fixed overnight. Confidence needs to be built up from the inside out and I really think Luka does a really good job of bringing that side out of Marinette.  She has great confidence in herself around Luka, but she freaks out about her designs not being good enough around Adrien (Mr. Pigeon, S1Ep6). In the Silencer episode (S3Ep6) you can see Luka constantly looking at her during rehearsal and praising her designs. Although Adrien does this in Mr. Pigeon, this is the only time it happens, and he’s been around her designs quite often - Style Queen (S2Ep23) and Reflekdoll (S3Ep9) to name a few - while Luka has only been around Marinette once, you can already tell that he’s not just being polite like Adrien. Confidence is something she lacks around Adrien, and maybe it’s because all he ever does is be polite around her and not so much genuine. Luka has said outright that she’s amazing (Captain Hardrock, S2Ep13).

Ok maybe that’s just semantics and poor line choices, so let’s talk about Luka’s confession:

"You are an extraordinary girl, Marinette. Clear as a music note, sincere as a melody. You have been the song I hear in my head since we first met. I won’t let anyone hurt you."

I swear if someone ever said that to me I would have lost it. Like, I would not know how to cope after that, forget Adrien, I want this kind of poetry in my life at all times. Regardless, this isn’t about me, this is about Marinette. This woman just stands there blushing, she knows that he likes her now, but she can’t get over Adrien, which is understandable, she’s liked him for so long. His confession just kinda shows that he’s ready to support her forever, and that’s really all he can do because clearly she’s still hung up on Adrien (Desperada, S3Ep13).

Here’s my issue with this, do we ever really hear why Marinette likes Adrien so much? For me, I have to separate the fanfiction from the show because I recall in so many fanfictions about why Marinette likes Adrien but do we ever get a reason in the show? Let’s look at the umbrella scene again, what made him so attractive in this one moment? Was it him saying he was trying to be a good friend? Was it the umbrella? Or, hear me out, his looks? We can’t tell for certain, all we know is, after given the umbrella, she’s completely in love with him. I fear that this is a toxic relationship though; throughout the show we can assume that Marinette has stalked Adrien (Copycat, S1Ep9) and has documented everything about him (Animaestro, S3Ep4). This obsessive behavior can come off as creepy irl and honestly our oblivious cinnamon roll is just vibing and only recently figure out that she liked him (Puppeteer 2, S3Ep12). She’s so nervous about being the perfect person around him I feel like she’s completely forgotten that he’s a person with feelings too. In fact, in the same episode, Marinette goes on a whole soliloquy about how perfect he is. I don’t think Marinette really can share her reasons for liking him and that’s a problem in itself.

Luka also complements Marinette very well. Our girl loves to get jittery and excited, she’s impulsive and just ready to take the initiative (as long as it’s not around Adrien). Her high-strung energy requires someone to be her rock and keep her centered. Luka proves to be a great supporter in Heart Hunter (S3Ep25) when Marinette is overwhelmed with emotions. He just stands there and let’s her cry, which I don’t think she would ever be able to do around Adrien. He also proves to be observant as a superhero (Desperada, S3Ep13) which is something that even Chat Noir sometimes can overlook. He knows even as a hero that he’s the support and Ladybug needs him for that reason.

Luka is really out here just trying to be supportive and I love the headcanon that he knows who Ladybug is because he can tell it’s Marinette’s voice, but that’s besides the point. Adrien is sort of being forced to the side because the show wants to dramatize the love life, which is understandable (I mean, who watches the show for the hero stuff, nah, we here for the romance). Like Kagami says, she’s gonna have to make up her mind eventually (S2Ep21) and I think the way the show is going, she’s currently siding with Luka given that Adrien is with Kagami (Miracle Queen, S3Ep26). I would love to see how the romance pans out in the end, because I really believe that the only reason why we’re here is because Adrien can’t make up his gd mind, and he’s honestly doing the same thing but with Ladybug - as in he’s not even considering other people or acknowledging them because he’s put Ladybug on a pedestal but can’t go through the same obsessive lengths like Marinette since she’s pretty good at hiding her identity, he’s got the Ladyblog and that’s it. (If ya’ll wanna talk about how oblivious he is hmu)

If you guys have any inputs feel free to have a discussion down below! I do sound a bit biased in this, but I hope my analysis explains why. As always this was just a fun post, so please don’t judge me based on this! Thanks~ 

[rogerina-deacon]

Brian giving you your first orgasm, you’ve had sex before but never the big O. Also, I really Love you’re writing! It’s absolutely wonderful

A/N: Okay so first off, thank you so much for enjoying my work! You have no idea how much it means to me getting told people appreciate my content 😊. Also, I saw a chance to make this friends to lovers so you know I had to take it, I hope you don’t mind!

A bit long, so it starts under the cut!

It was a Friday night where you and you best friend Brian had nothing planned for the night besides talking about whatever and having a few drinks

You were very open about your sexuality with him, and he tried to be the same with you

But he could be a tad shy about it, especially since he had a major crush on you

And whenever you would talk about the guys you hooked up with, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of jealousy as you talked about what they were like

But then you said something that completely shocked him- that you didn’t think you could orgasm

He nearly choked on his beer when you mentioned that not only had no man made you cum, but even you couldn’t make yourself climax when you masturbate

“Wait, but I thought you said they were amazing?” He asked once he was done with the coughing fit he had from nearly choking on his drink

“Well, they were, but I just couldn’t cum, I guess. I don’t know, I guess something’s wrong with me.” You said, taking a sip of your drink

“I’m sure you can cum, the guys you’ve been with probably just don’t know how to get you there. Did they actually try to make you cum?” He asked, hoping they weren’t ignoring your needs

“What do you mean? Like, did they go down on me?” You clarified, and he nodded before continuing

“Well, not just going down on you, but going down on you properly and with the goal of getting you off. Also, rubbing your clit when he’s, um, inside you.”

“No, I can’t say any of them have done any of that.” You said, laughing humorlessly

“Well then they’re selfish pricks that don’t understand how to treat a woman.” he sighed, finishing off his beer in a swig

Now you were sat, biting you lip with a cloud of sexual tension hanging over you and Brian

You had to admit, Brian seemingly knowing how to get you off was very attractive, arousing even

But he had never made a move on you before, so you figured he just wasn’t into you

That is, until he cleared his throat and spoke up

“Um, sorry if this is sudden and not wanted, if so just forget I ever suggested it, but, uh… I could, y’know, help you, uh, orgasm.” He said, staring down at the empty bottle in his hands, which he was tapping nervously

You weren’t exactly caught off-guard, you were honestly hoping he would offer, but you weren’t sure how to respond to your best friend offering to make you cum

“Oh, um, yeah, you definitely can” You said, chuckling nervously, a smile on your face

“Yeah?” He asked, looking up at you, a smile on his face as well now

“Yeah” You confirmed, and he took the drink from your hand and placed it on the coffee table along with his empty bottle

“Okay, um, can I kiss you?” He asked, looking at you hopeful

“Brian, you just offered to give me my first orgasm, of course you can kiss me.” You said, laughing, and he nodded his head as he noticed how silly he was for asking that

You placed your hand on his cheek, cupping his jaw, and he turned his head to look at you before leaning in and connecting his lips to yours

The kiss was sweet, soft as he slowly moved his lips

His hand moved to cup your face as well as he adjusted to sit on his knees on the couch, so he was almost hunched as he leaned over you

Deepening the kiss, you moved to be under him, and he moved his other hand to rest on your waist

Slowly, he trailed kisses down your jaw, down along your neck as he placed open-mouthed kisses, searching for your sweet spot

You stretched your neck to give him better access, and he fully went in to kiss and suck on your sweet spot, soft moans escaping your mouth as your hips already rocked in search of fiction

He moved his hands to explore your skin under your shirt, trailing up to your breasts, giving a light squeeze before his hands moved to the back of your bra, unclasping the hooks before removing his mouth from you neck

You ever-so-slightly whined at the loss of contact, but as soon as he removed your shirt and bra he started kissing you skin again, this time on the supple skin of your breasts, one hand cupping and softly massaging one breast as his mouth slowly made its way to your nipple, where he licked and swirled his tongue around the hard and sensitive bud before wrapping his lips around it, sucking and nibbling as soft as he could

As he did that, his hand on your breast played with your nipple, pinching and tweaking it, making you moan

Removing his hand from your breast, he slowly moved it along your sides, his mouth soon following suit, kissing down your stomach as he made his way to your anxious pussy

Stopping at the waistband of your pants, he undid your jeans before sliding them down your legs along with your panties, tossing them to the floor before using his hands to spread your legs for better access to you

“Are you sure you want this?” He asked, making sure he wasn’t pressuring you into this

This was something he had dreamed of, but would never do if you didn’t truly want it

“Yes, Brian, I’m sure, now please do something” You pleaded, staring at him with such need in your eyes

Smiling, he began placing kisses down your thighs, starting at your knees and working his way down

Reaching your aching pussy, he licked up from the bottom of your entrance up to your clit, circling the swollen bundle of nerves with his tongue before licking another stripe up your slit

He started essentially making out with your cunt, kissing and sucking on you just like he would with your mouth, before he played with your clit some more with his tongue

Swirling the tip of his tongue around your clit, he alternated how he stimulated you, switching between that swirling movement and flicking your hardened clit as you started bucking your hips

He moved his arms to wrap around your thighs from under you, pulling you into him as he wrapped his lips around your clit, swirling his tongue around it yet again as he slowly sucked and gently tugged, moving his head just as he would if he were making out with you

Beautiful sounds flew from your mouth, moans and slight whimpers that Brian loved hearing from between your thighs

Slowly, he trailed his right hand from gripping your thigh to laying flat on your skin, moving under you to your dripping cunt

He began prodding his middle finger at your entrance before pushing it inside you, simply thrusting it in and out of your tight cunt to get it used to his long fingers before hooking it into your g-spot, making a loud moan escape your throat as your head threw itself back to rest between your shoulder blades, the pleasure building within you like never before

He added a second finger, stimulating your g-spot harder and faster than before as his mouth grew hungrier for your orgasm, working hard on your clit to get you there

Your hand moved to entangle your fingers in his hair, pushing his face even further into you as your hips rocked against him, your orgasm fast approaching

And when he started moaning against your clit the vibrations made you cum almost instantly, like a dam collapsing inside you, bursts of pleasure shooting through your body, radiating from your cunt as he continuously pleasured you, not stopping until your orgasm seemed to be over

When he moved away from your sensitive pussy, he looked up at you, smiling, bottom half of his face covered in your juices

“How was it? Did you cum?” He asked, knowing full well you did

“Of course I did, it was fucking amazing, Bri. Are they always like that?” You asked, breathing heavy as you relaxed in post-orgasmic bliss

“Sometimes, though it all depends on who it’s with, I guess. Not everyone can make women cum that hard, I suppose.” He said, feeling a bit cocky and confident that he could make you cum that hard

“Guess I should just stick to you then, yeah?” You suggested, smiling

“Yeah, yeah, I guess so. One condition though.” He said, relaxing on the couch with you

“And what’s that?”

“I get to take you out on a date sometime.”

“I’d love that, Brian.” You said, smiling up at him as you cuddled into his side, though you couldn’t help but notice his hard cock straining against his jeans

“Need help with that? A bit of repayment for giving me my first orgasm?”

“Oh, um, no need to ‘repay’ me for it, it was my pleasure, truly. Maybe some other time, I don’t want tonight to be about me.” He assured you

“Definitely some other time. Maybe after that date?” You suggested, and he nodded, pulling you closer into him

“Sounds good.” He confirmed, and you two sat on the couch, just enjoying each others company and your new relationship for the rest of the night.

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