#Pffffft yea right

[downfallofi]

So damn weird (and I also can't stop thinking about) how I did my routine call to check in on my dad and today he surprised me with an oddly emotional type of reaction (I mean, for him, having a tone in his voice that sounds near enough to being teary is really unexpected, growing up I didn't think he knew any shades of emotion save rage, narcissism or occassionally copacetic silence). Mans literally had a tone in his voice and said he sometimes worried I'd never get around to visiting again, and I had to pause and look at the phone like ye uhhhhhhhh what?

[alastair-1205]

Episode 17 reactions

KAI AND BONZEL YAY

This feels like A Trap 

“Don’t Ninja sleep in?” See Lloyd didn’t answer that cuz he would have had to lie lmao

Oh Nya’s just dipping ok 

THEYRE FAMILYYYYY

OH YO THEY BROUGHT THAT BACK 

SIBLINGS!!!!! THEYRE TALKING YAYA

I- you know what yea that actually tracks lol

LMAO KAI I think he’d implode if he didn’t bully Jay at least a bit

Zane out here asking the real questions 

Bro got out the red string and whiteboard damn 

The drawings are kinda hilarious tho

LMAO WYLDFYRE it’s a fair assumption 

This is kinda fucking fascinating watching Arin talk through this 

This just sounds like racism- 

Ras totally did it tho right? Like he’s just smart enough to make a bot attack himself but it looked like Imperium tech right? That’s the type of shit he’d know to make 

This is what season 4 needed man I’m liking the mystery 

THEIR DATE IS HELPING THE MISSION LMAO

LOOK HOW HAPPY HE IS WHEN HE TALK ABOUT HIS HUSBAND <3

PFFFFFT ZANE-

Our guy is starting to honest to god see the future damn 

Like that’s as blatant as they’ve been so far I think 

Also does he not recall how one of them was Arin decking him in the face?

Geo and Robie!

Lmao Geo just got an art commission instead of fighting good for him 

Robie’s an iPad kid confirmed

Im gonna stab this kid-

So like, who are the Devonians?? 

Is Frank gonna become more relevant? That’d be cool. Cuz Ras seems pissed that he’s actually trying to, you know, learn

I REALLY LIKE FRACK WHY DID RAS HAVE TO FIND HIM FIRST 

It’s kinda cool seeing this mini game in ninjago

Girl I thought you were in prison not exile? 

Bro leave him alone he’s hearing voices give him a minute 

Cole just wants to help man and Frack just wants to learn

I like Arin having that book with him all the time it’s cool

Wyld is fucking struggling lol

Why does it seem like zeatrix also knows they’re gonna fight? 

Cuz Now I’m thinking it’s her 

GEO

OH DAMN SO HES JUST BEEN WINNING 

YO THAT GUYS BACK TOO. MASTER OF THE MIND. I forgot his name

Geo tried lol

CHAMILE!!

Elemental master of Life. Alright then good to know.

Yeet

Oh. He’s scared of his visions again maybe? 

Oh smart play

Hes gonna be so fixated on it that he looses 

Wtf is the power of surface tension-

“SHES MAKING AN ELEMENTAL BOMB” I fucking love Robie

Who is he streaming to??

LMAO SORA. The others tried

That is the shittiest platform of all time-

Bro really said fuck destiny. Good for him 

WHY IS HE ALWAYS GETTING HORRIFICALLY INJURED LMAO. 

Im treating this was like a slash wound to the chest becasue of the sword becasue by that logic Zeatrix’s fall should have killed her too 

Arin is not gonna be happy. 

[gungemastersblog]

Charlie and Adam went over to make garnacho his sandwich Charlie said "this will slow the bully down it's a fast working laxitive it will only work for about a hour but he will be crapping like water coming out of a tap

Adam smiled they put the laxitive in the sandwich and took it to garnacho he scoffed the whole thing right away his belly rumbled and he did a huge fart and then another one

He told Jacob to stop rubbing his feet he got up and did a little fart it sound so nasty Jacob laughed

So did hrvy in the tank

Garnacho said what the fuck is going on

Pfffffffft he did one that sounded like a bomb had gone off in his undies

What's up dude ahaha Charlie said

Sounds like someone has alot of gas Adam said

Garnacho was really letting it rip now his farts were rank it was like something had died and come out of his butt

He said I think I need to poo poo this made everyone laugh

Garnacho didnt like being laughed at

Jacob said there must be a gas leak in garnachos pants ahah

Garnacho farted again

Adam said yea he has alot of gas haha

Charlie said I think he's about to blow ahaha

The others laughed

Garnacho let out another huge one pffffft

He pushed past the others

He ran to the toilet not but...

(he makes it to toliet)

(he craps himself in front of everyone)

(the next next house mate is his friend he hugs him and they go and gunge hrvy all while garnacho is going pale and struggling it in

[bluepallilworld]

I took some pictures of my hands to study it a bit, feel free to use those if you want I guess (show me tho (✷‿✷))

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

[maxirueee]

AU Alberu's POV as the experimented Beru

Alberu: Cale?

Cale: ...nggh..yes?

Cale rubs his eyes as he tried to open them slowly only to see his lover looking right at him with a nervous expression.

Alberu: I suddenly had a bad dream.

Cale: It's literally 3am in the morning.

Alberu: mm..yea- well *fidgeting*

Cale: Spit it out. What was your bad dream about Beru?

Alberu: DON'T CALL ME THAT ANYMORE- PLEASE just please I'm begging you...

Cale was in deep shock that his lover raised his voice at him just because of what? He called him by his nickname?

Cale: Didn't you tell me multiple times that I should stop calling you 'hyung' when we finally got together?

Alberu: I-its not that.. I just-

Cale: Tell me what's wrong Beru.

Alberu: THAT'S the PROBLEM.

Cale: Which is??

Alberu: That nickname, in my dream I was suddenly trapped in a flat boxed screen, I couldn't move but all I could do was smile. Smiling while looking towards the horizon which seemed endless. White. Blank.

ALberu: After a few minutes I suddenly heard voices. At first, there were a lot of compliments about how radiant I loo-

Cale: Are you even sure that's a bad dream?

Alberu: Yeah it is a bad dream!

Cale: Aren't you just totally flaunting how good-looking you are? You're srsly waking me up in the middle of the night because of this? I'm going back to slee-

Alberu: I SWEAR THAT'S NOT IT!

Cale looks back at Alberu who had a look of desperation. Cale couldn't distinguish if what he's seen rolling down the face of his beloved was sweat or tears. Maybe both. Well, he might as well comfort his lover since that was his job. Alberu: I heard giggles, squeals, people were shrieking with how I finally appeared. They kept saying that I looked so dazzling, how I sparkled. They were even speaking the same annoying lines that you tell me every time with your glib tongue.

Cale: Whatever do you mean oh shining sun of the Roan Empi-

Alberu: My point exactly *glaring at Cale*

Cale: Alright go on.

Alberu: It went on for days, I couldn't tell how long I was trapped in that frame-like screen window, all of a sudden I reverted back to my dark elf form.

Cale continues to stare at him, already feeling bored as he watched Alberu continue ranting his struggle of a mere dream. Although he found it amusing as he heard him say the next lines.

Alberu: But it didn't stop there, my hair color suddenly changed to a blood-red color just like yours Cale. I was the spitting image of you. And the voices agreed on how we really are sworn brothers if we just switched hair colors.

Cale: Hoh...

'There must be something more to this if it actually made the emperor of the Roan Kingdom have buckets of sweat rolling down his pretty face.'

Alberu: It was until I heard somebody say, 'How about a Pink Haired Beru?'

Cale: Huh?

Alberu: My hair color immediately changed to pink, then sky blue, then green, then orange, then red again. I didn't know when it'd stop but I couldn't even budge. Even when I wanted to so bad.

Alberu looked dead straight in Cale's eyes, with both his hands firmly holding his partner's shoulders, but ironically he was shaking. Alberu Crossman was shaking in fear. For what reason? Is this another one of the Sun God's pranks to his lover? Perhaps it was the God of Death again? He continues to ponder at the annoying thought that maybe divine beings were messing around his precious people again but stopped as Alberu continued speaking his worries.

Alberu: I thought it was okay since it was just a hair color change..then a woman's voice asked with great anticipation, "HOW ABOUT A BALD AND A MOHAWKBERU?"

Alberu: I continued to smile, even when my luscious golden blonde hair was instantly gone and I was suddenly bald. BALD! I saw numerous hearts floating in front of me and I could hear the mockery and laughter of beings I could not even see. Yet I continued to smile.

Cale was speechless.

Alberu: For some reason, I could read the words floating in front of me. "EVERYBODY GIVE IT UP FOR THE ROAN KINGDOM'S FAVORITE SHINING SUN- BALDBERU" is what it said. More hearts appeared at a scary rate and I couldn't even shout or move. I was terrified.

Alberu glared at the person in front of him like a mad man. Cale just shut up and listened to whatever he said, Alberu really looked mental.

Alberu: The woman from a while ago spoke again, I swear her voice was scary beyond belief. She added "Okay everybody hold up- Now imagine DELINQUENT HAIRCUT AlBERU"

Alberu: My hair suddenly grew back twice as much and it was styled into this weird looking hairdo...

Cale continued to have his stoic face which made Alberu feel relieved. Little does he know Cale was on the verge of laughing his ass off-

ALberu: I suddenly heard "JOSUBERU I CAN'T WITH THIS FANDOM- YA'LL REALLY DID IT U PUNKS" again from that mortifying woman since earlier, apparently it was done by a group of people claiming to be my fans?! BUT THE MONSTROSITY THEY'VE- no that wasn't even half of it

Cale: 'There's actually more?! PFFFFFT' I see, continue then. The prince saw his darling sweetheart Cale shaking as if he was sympathizing with what he was going through. At that very moment, he felt touched by his lover's empathy towards himself.

Alberu: The horrors didn't end just there as I was still waiting for the whole nightmare to be over, they were begging for a 'Voldeberu' which I don't even understand, at that point, I SUDDENLY LOST MY NOSE!!

I WAS BALD AGAIN AND MY NOSE DISAPPEARED YET I WAS STILL SMILING. I HAVE NEVER FELT SO MUCH FEAR IN MY LIFE.

Alberu: Somebody then proposed a 'Clowberu' AND MY FACE SUDDENLY BECAME A CLOWN WEARING MAKEUP. The hardships I had to take while staying still like a fucking mannequin. BUT IT STILL DIDNT STOP THERE.

Cale almost broke into laughter as he wanted to continue listening to his lover's amusing dream! If he laughs now Alberu might as well punch him in the face.

Alberu: I wanted to cry, I pleaded with the Sun God in my head that I want this to stop but I didn't get what I wanted. Instead, a chatbox suddenly appeared, I almost pissed my pants reading at the schemes of those so-called 'fans' had for me.

Cale: Oho.. what did you s-see then? 'Pfft'

Alberu: "LET'S MAKE HIS SKIN GREEN WITH ONLY ONE EYE, MIKE WAZOWSKIEBERU" "We need a butt, BUTTBERU" "I still didn't get my mohawhkberu!" "TWIN TAILESBERU" "AFROBERU!" "MONKBERU!" "SANGWOOBERU" "COWBERU" "UCHIHABERU" "I SAY NUNBERU! NUNBERU SUPREMACY RISE!!!!!!"

I DON'T EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT MIKE WAZOWSKI BERU! BUT THEY WANT MY HEAD TO BE A COW?! HOW COULD THEY TO THE EMPEROR OF THE RO-

Cale couldn't handle it anymore he bursts out laughing, almost in tears.

Cale: BUHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAH!!! If only I was there to see it all! I ca- I CANT! MIKE WAZOW- WAZOWSKI HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH AND AFRO?! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Alberu: How could you be laughing at my pain?!

Cale: Oh dear emperor of mine, isn't it fine that you have such 'entertaining fans' of yours?

Alberu: Entertaining can't even describe those lots... They all praised me for how I was the rising sun of the Roan Kingdom as they humiliated my every being. To the point where they even planned on turning me into 'LIGHTBULBERU'. A FUCKING LIGHTBULB BECAUSE THEY WANT ME TO SHINE LITERALLY. A WALKING FLASHLIGHT KING. ME. ALBERU CROSSMAN.

Cale: PFFT HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Alberu: Haaaahh... You don't understand because you were never in my position. Those fans were a bunch of lunatics I say, LUNATICS!

What Alberu doesn't know is that we, the fandom won't just stop there...

Alberu felt shivers down his spine as he recalled the very vivid and realistic experience he had inside his dream.

Cale: I am so telling this to Tasha, my esteemed and very much adored Beru <3

Alberu: JUST CALL ME HYUNG PLEASE!!

The trauma seemed to have sunken deep into his mind that every time Cale calls him by that nickname, he subconsciously touches his hair and nose in order to reassure himself that it's still there.

I'm tagging these superb beings for making the thread LEGENDARY: @cale-alberu @chunnicalesimp @thescarletguard @trashduchesshenituse-reblogs @farmercale @just-a-sleepy-person @annerisk @pile-of-sticks @trash-duchess-henituse @icyteaa

[husbandohunter]

Duuuudddeeee since Stardew Valley is in modern era Imagine the Isekai couple, not the star cross lover one I ain’t thirsty for angsts.... yet. ANYWAYZZZZ!!! Imagine them getting introduce to monopoly. The chaos is gonna be BEAUTIFUL!!! Childe is probably gonna be the most chaotic, he is so competitive! Xiao will probably rage quit! Kaeya, I can’t help but feel like his gonna cheat his way through the game....

I. LIVE. AND. BREATHE. FOR. MODERN. GENSHIN 😤😤😤

yuh lets forget abt the sad days yea?

Omg I haven't played monopoly in yEARS so bear with me if my rules are either old-fashioned or nonexistent xD Childe would probably be the type of guy who games on a regular basis (although not obsessively), playing monopoly with him would probably be the most enjoyable, as you've mentioned, chaotic (there is no party without chaos hurhur). I can totally see that Childe will get super duper in to the game maybe even taking it a tad bit too serious loser fights to the death.

Although Xiao may not be the type to indulge in miniscule activities, he most likely played some traditional Liyue boardgames before so this shouldn't be any different right? Ohoho but you just haaaaad to pick Kaeya and Childe as his opponents, god he wouldn't even rage quit from losing but rather because these two fools are just so damn annoying that he rather leaves willingly. But I could imagine that he isn't so bad at board games, pretty decent actually. He scoffs at it at first until more rounds come in, you notice that Xiao starts to take it more seriously especially when under the silver tongue of these two men.

Kaeya? Cheat? What are you talking about? Pffffft he does not cheat ;) though he makes you think that he is just to make things interesting. You can't even predict his strategy, either he had a plan in mind for victory or it just looks like he's stupidly screwing himself over with his choice. Who knows really, he just enjoys seeing his opponents stressing over what kind of path he's taking. Probably the type to leave you an open door, making you think that you'll win only to snatch the rug under your feet last minute. Infuriating I'm telling you.

[buublepup]

Teamwork

A/N: I wrote this super impulsively for @cupcake-spice13 for her promt hehe!

Summary: Izuku is being cocky about winning game night mutple times and his friends and having none of it.

Word count: 743

———————————————————————

“Ok THAT was not fair.” Uraraka huffed after Izuku won Sorry for the fith time that night.

“Haha I told you I’m the best at board games!!” Izuku smiled smugly.

“Your like the worst at board games, you just got lucky!! Ribbit!” Tsu kicked the board glaring directly at Izuku.

“That wasn’t very sportsmen-like Tsu~!! You guys are such bad losers hehe!!” Izuku said matter of factly. The girls were about to snap back when Tenya interrupted.

“Hey how about we play a teamwork game where we ALL win? Hmm? Sounds fun right?” He nudged Todoroki who agreed.

“Nah see then we’ll all definitely lose cause you guys ~can’t play board games~!” Izuku sang.

“Midorya your being a bit like Bakugo when he wins game night.” Todoroki threw a game peice at him. Izuku was about to throw one back when Uraraka started talking.

“HEY I just got a GREAT idea for a teamwork game!!” She poped up and pulled her friends closer. Except Deku.

“Heeey I wanna play!!” He whined and tried to hear what his friends were whispering.

“Oh you can.” Todoroki reassured.

“We’re just not gonna tell you the rules so uh it’s harder!!” Uraraka giggled. “Because your SoooooOOO much better than us!!” They all giggled.

“Oh ok then!! I like challenges!!” He smiled smugly.

After like 5 minutes they moved back over with him.

“Okay ready to play Deku?” Tsu said, trying to giggle. They were all smiling except Todoroki who had a very small smirk on.

“Yea!! Can I have like some rules so I know how to play?” He asked and they all smiled more.

“Stay still~!”

“...what?”

Izuku squeaked when Tenya grabbed his arms and held them over his head. “H-hey what are you doing!!??”

“Playing a game.” Todoroki responded scooting closer. Izuku whined when they all got closer.

“Tsu get his feet!!!” Uraraka giggled and Izuku squeaked, pulling his feet to his chest and squrming after realizing what was happening.

“Eek!! G-guys n-no!! I don’t wanna play!!! C-cant we just talk???” He rammbled.

“Maybe if you weren’t so cocky when we were playing games!!” Todoroki said and straddled him, scratching at his knees, cause if Izuku’s legs to shoot down for Tsu to sit on.

“NuuHUHUHEHEHEHE!!!” Izuku gasped when Tenya, who he forgot was there, suddenly dug into his underarms.

“Haha Tenya we were gonna count down!!” Uraraka giggled staring to squeeze at his knees and thighs. Followed by Tsu and Todoroki.

Absolute torture.

That is what Izuku thought as his four friends tickled him literally everywhere and teasing him.

“Pffffft deku do you like this~ you must why else would you have been so cocky?” Uraraka teased finding a spot above his knees that made him scream.

“Midorya picked up Bakugou’s behavior. We’re tickling it out of you!!” Todoroki giggled at Izuku’s reaction after pressing his cold fingers all around his tummy.

“NHOHOHO G-GUHAHAHYS SOWHEHEHEHE-*snort*”

They all awwwd at that. Talking about how cute he was amongst each other, completely ignoring Izuku’s snorty pleads.

It was when Tenya AND todoroki went to scratch and poke at his underarms at the same time that he lost his shit. (Like he wasn’t before lol)

“NAAAAHAHAHAHHAHANONONONONONONONOTTHEHEHEAHAHAH!!” He squealed and shook around, blushing like no tomorrow when the two boys giggled down at him evilly and continued the torture.

Soon after he went limp and excepted he was screwed. To the fours delight.

“Awww deku can’t take it anymore!!! I bet that tickles so bad!!” Uraraka cooed.

“Karmas a bitch.” Todoroki giggled.

“He hasn’t said sorry yet, maybe he likes it!!” Tenya made him squeal as he pressed into the bottom of his underarms.

“Do you like this midorya?” Todoroki asked. Izuku tried to respond but Tsu kept messing with his toes every time he tried to talk so he just nodded no.

“Lies!!” They all chanted at the same time making Izuku laughter more.

“AHAHAHAEHEHE SORRYYYY!!” He squealed when he finally couldn’t handle it any more. They all giggled but didn’t stop for a couple more minutes just to punish him more.

They finally stoped and Izuku panted in Tenyas arms who was holding him up.

“Whops sorry deku looks like you lost that one!!” Tsu giggled, patting his head.

“That was s-so meaaaan!!!” Izuku whined to witch they all giggled and took turns poking his sides while Tenya held him up just to warn him.

Izuku never braged about winning game night ever again.

[anatomiist-blog]

Hogwarts House Percentage Breakdown

REPOST, DON’T REBLOG!  Take the quiz here.

Robert’s breakdown is…

36% Ravenclaw, 29% Gryffindor, 28% Slytherin, and 7% Hufflepuff

You believe above all in the importance of wisdom, which is why you undoubtedly belong in Ravenclaw, but your sense of adventure means you may also have an affinity for Gryffindor house. You are a thrill-seeker – you love to travel and there’s nothing more exciting to you than new experiences – and believe that adventure is essential in the pursuit of knowledge. You are brave, but would never intentionally put yourself in danger, placing you firmly in Ravenclaw. Your slight compatibility with Slytherin house suggests a determination to succeed, though not at the expense of traits from your more dominant houses.

Tagged by:  @heillagr Tagging: @sprigxfthyme @shamrockshore / @eyesofanirishman @the-belle-of-belfast-city @glennisdair @thebeautyofliberty @konigreich @liachtaschta @zettaina @vicemirrored

[lonelyghosts-stuff]

Marvel’s Hawkeye Reaction-Episode 3

I’m actually really excited lol. Didn’t think I would be this hyped about this show

Thanks for the recap. I have the memory of a goldfish

Ayo I just realized that’s Echo!!

2007 huh? I’m assuming this is also following echo?

Smart little cookie huh?

I mean, adhering watching Shang Chi? Yes dragons are real lol

I wonder if they actually got a deaf actress to play the kid and the adult?

Oh she did karate too huh?

I wouldn’t say the matches are about speed vs size… they’re about understanding your opponent and then working accordingly lol.

Oh she also has a prosthetic foot? Wonder what happened… don’t think her comic book counterpart had one but I could be wrong. The most I know about Echo is from her Fandom Wiki page lmao

Pffffft okay I’m sorry that was so funny. Obviously the little girl doesn’t actually have martial arts experience so it’s understandable that they’d edit it that way, but still lol.

Man I miss doing karate tho. Fun fact, made my way to a first degree black belt. I wanna get back into it, or at least some form of martial arts again.

Oop time jump

Would it be considered unfair for her to have a prosthetic lmaoooo? Like that crap would hurt hella more than a normal foot. Use it to your advantage ig

Oop Ronin slaying her gang

How did she join a gang tho? What was her dad and uncle up to???? We know Ronin aka Clint was like a vigilante so he wasn’t just like killing innocent people, he was killed violent criminal organizations… so what was Echo’s papa up to?

Bro don’t wipe your blood on her lol that’s how illnesses spread

Did that dude just refer to the ride as a brony?

“You good?” Okay so Kate is literally the most relatable person in the MCU for me rn lmaoooo her and Peter Parker

Imagine Dragons tickets lmaoooo

Okay I love the Tracksuit Mafia lmaoooo

Kate how dare you insult Imagine Dragons

LMAOOO SHE’S BEING A THERAPIST FOR HIM BAHAHAHAHA

Well then. That got violent. Rip out her throat?

Oh no Clint’s hearing is acting up again huh?

Lmaooooo Clint cmon bro

“She’s nine.” Lmao

Oof black widow killed ronin huh? Good story I guess.

Dang Maya got anger issues lol

Is these an abandoned toy store?

Please don’t have Clint get beaten up just cuz he’s a dude. He still has more experience

Oof there goes the hearing aid.

Lmao conveniently knocked right into the room with the arrows and bow

NICE SHOT CLINT HELL YEA

Ouch arrows to the foot lol

And one to the throat dang

Go Kate go!!!! Queen!!!

LMAO SHE CAUGHT HIM IN THE SHOPPING CART

Oh hey I saw this scene in a trailer promo clip

Lmaooo she doesn’t know how to drive uh oh

Lmaoooo the classical music on the radio nice

Poor late lol

Okay wow I love the style this car scene is being shot in!!! Oml this is a brilliant oner too!!!

Oh poor Clint can’t hear…

Oh my gosh I love them so much

Oops bomb arrow

This is such a fun car chase lol. Like I know it’s not too serious or anything but it works for the theme

Sorry Santa lmao

How has Kate not fallen out lol

GRAB YOUR BOW KATE

Dang was that a poison arrow?

RIP classic Challenger Car

Lmaooo no one will believe that little girls story

TEAM WORK LESSGO

Pym???

OH

How did he get his hands on a pym enlarging arrow????

HELL YEA GRAPPLE ARROW

How’d they get inside the train tho lmao

Lmaooo lucky!!! Walk the dog!

Awwww supportive Clint!

Lmaooooo poor Clint he needs his hearing aids lmaoooo but their minds are in sync!

I like the audio tricks switching back to hearing from Clint’s perspective. Nice touch.

Uh oh phone call. Lemme guess, Laura?

Just tell Nathaniel that your hearing aid isn’t working rn

I like this scene a lot. Kate is helping Clint understand what Nathanial is saying.

Oh man… poor Clint… he just wants to be with his family so badly…

Wonder why Clint only has one hearing aid tho? Seems he can’t really hear from either ear so shouldn’t he have two? Or do I not understand how hearing aids work?

Oml I just realized those transport vehicles are called “Trust a Bro” lol

So are we gonna get an explanation about Maya/Echo’s past? Like her foot? What kind of stuff her dad was up to?

Uncle? Her uncle? What kind of crime group are y’all? I’m just saying like, I’m not too sad about Maya’s dad dying if he was a violent criminal lol

“Hahah block delete.” Are you one of my friends lol

Ouch Clint jeez. Poor Kate lol. She’s such a fan girl

Poor Clint doesn’t wanna be branded. He just wants to retire finally

Lmaoooo one of his classic comic costume

Oh damn she’s picking up on who Ronin is

“I’m not a role model.” 😭 poor Clint… he still hates himself for Ronin and for not being able to save Nat

Dammit Kate lmao did you not have ANY cash on you?

Dog naming GO!

PIZZA DOG GO!

“The hot guy who spoke sign language.” BAHAHAHA WHY IS SHE THIS WAY??? Dammit lmao. But like, I can’t cringe because same.

So the “operation”… what exactly do they do? Besides crime lol

Oml pizza dog is my favorite character

Might wanna elaborate on the butterscotch

Lmao the taxi driver just like “minding my own businesssss! Not my problem!”

Let the dog free lol.

Rich girl life lol

Poor Clint is so out of it rn lol. Dude just wants to retire

Uh oh. Someone’s here

Lmao Kate nice one

Uh oh

Ronin sword

Hey Jack.

Wait no don’t end the episode! Ah crap

I don’t wanna wait another week!!!

This is still easily my favorite marvel disney show so far tho. I like the themes and vibes it’s going for. The overall tone is a nice mix of absurd and humor with some good serious moments. Definitely feels like a comic brought directly to life. Love the dynamic between Kate and Clint.

My main concern rn is how they’re gonna approach Echo with the tracksuit mafia. Like I hope they don’t try to criminalize Clint for killing her father when he was also a criminal. But I didn’t get that vibe so far so that’s good. Also the fact that this is episode three and the show is only six episodes long if memory serves me correctly, so I really hope they maintain a good sense of pacing. Don’t want anything to be rushed and fall apart. Like so far it feels like there should be at least five more episodes to tie off the story, but I guess I’ll just have to wait and see how they do with the last three episodes.

[ismokeitsite]

Pffffft. Yea, right

Pffffft. Yea, right https://ift.tt/3uL7RoI Submitted March 02, 2021 at 10:12AM by Herbies_Seeds via reddit

[kanisuru]

98east replied to your post: 98east replied to your post: Real smooth, Akira....

❛ Pffffft yea right! I’m not buyin’ that one.

Thank goodness my sex life doesn’t depend on the opinion of my twin. 

[tigertae]

70 horrible questions

UWaaaaa I got tagged by @acelululala​. Thanks you sweetie~ <3

It’s under the cut cause it’s pretty long :’D

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? Me and my mom are very close as of now. But me and my dad never really speak :’D  02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? I don’t remember O_O 03: Do you regret anything? Yes. Who doesn’t :’) 04: Are you insecure? Very..... OTL 05: What is your relationship status? Single. And that’s how I like it :’D 06: How do you want to die? Uhm.... As less painful as possible?  07: What did you last eat? a little cake filled with custard. 08: Played any sports? When I was really little I played volleyball. I don’t remember much of it tho. lol 09: Do you bite your nails? Not anymore~ 10: When was your last physical fight? uhm.... 10-12 years ago.  11: Do you like someone? Yes. :’D 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? Yup.....  13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? Yea. Trump :’D  14: Do you miss someone? Yea 15: Have any pets? Yup~ We have a doggie called Jemie <33333 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? Neutral?.... No... Slightly annoyed actually.... My mom’s boyfriend just told us off over something HE always does....... 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? Nooo 18: Are you scared of spiders? No. I was tho. Not anymore~ 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? Yes. But only if it’s to give advice or something... Not to stay. 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? Wha? What is snogged?..... /looks it up/ oh.... uhm.... In a car? Yea. It was in a car....  21: What are your plans for this weekend? Lol the weekend just ended. But I have no plans for any weekend tho lol. I’m poor and my friends live far away from me and never want to come over :’D 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? Nope.  23: Do you have piercings? How many? I have tunnels in my ears~ Does that count? 14mm. 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? English! :D and artsy things. 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? I do.... :( this question made me saaaaad ;A; 26: What are you craving right now? Lately I crave pizza alot of the time. 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? I don’t know.... I hope not ;A; well... I think I have tho... I turned down 2 guys before.... and I was the one that broke up with my ex... ;A;  28: Have you ever been cheated on? Nope 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? I don’t know... Does during a break up count?... Cause then yes.... ;-; 30: What’s irritating you right now? My mom’s BF :’D 31: Does somebody love you? I hope so :’D 32: What is your favourite color? omfg I had fav colors but really I just love all colors. I love colors~ 33: Do you have trust issues? I don’t know... I don’t think so? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? I always dream full stories so.... I’m going to try to make it short. I was in some kind of mall and my mom and my bro where there and we were searching for something and there were objects all over the place so we had to maneuver over them to get somewhere.... and at one point I was flying :’D 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? My mom I think 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? No. I’m actually kinda harsh in that point... :’D I do give someone a second chance but it depends on the thing they did. I had a friend once who basically wished me dead and told me to kill myself and all that nasty stuff... When she called me a few days after that I told her to not call me again and just hung up.... :’D 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? Idk...  38: Is this year the best year of your life? The year just started.  39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? Uuuuuuuuhm 20? 21? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? No. lol 51: Favourite food? Pffffft idk... I love so many foods... But we have this dish in the Netherlands that’s called “Boerenkool” and my mom makes the best. With bacon and “Unox Worst” <333333 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? I guess.... But the universe hates my guts if that’s true 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? Kakaotalk 54: Is cheating ever okay? NO!! 55: Are you mean? I hope not :’D  56: How many people have you fist fought? 2. My bro and a girl from school. 57: Do you believe in true love? Not reallly.. 58: Favourite weather? 24 C with a slight little wind 59: Do you like the snow? It depends.... Playing with snow is nice but when you have to travel through it, it’s not... 60: Do you wanna get married? Nope. 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? I guess? :’D 62: What makes you happy? SHINee~ <3 63: Would you change your name?   Yes. Cause my actual name is Kimberley. I’d rather change it to Kim permanently. I love my last name tho “van der Linden”. It sounds super fancy lol. Also it fits behind literally ANY name. 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? Yes. Since she lives 3 countries away. lol And if she was right here it would still be hard tho...  65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? This happened to me irl and it was complicated asFuCK... I liked him back and then we kissed and then it was all a mess and complicated and.... we don’t speak to each other anymore now, so..... And I miss him alot actually..... Gahd.... I’m trying real hard to forget about him tbh.... 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? Nope. 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? My bro. :’D 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? A friend on Kakaotalk. :) 69: Do you believe in soulmates? Idk.... That stuff is really complicated since people change throughout the years... That’s why I don’t really believe in true love either. 70: Is there anyone you would die for? Yes. Absolutely.

This was kinda hard :’D Hah~ But thank you so much for tagging me <333 But I’m not going to tag anyone tho OTL Im sorry OTL ^^”

[dylanthoran-blog]

D&Da 4: Katak , The Legend

Callie and Rede left the town to head towards the predestinated meeting point. Neither of them had much to do in town besides trade a few items, so they figured they could head out early and have camp completely set up for when the rest of their party finally came around. It was nice and peaceful in the woods where they set up camp. Just another average, calm day of their travelling life often filled with interesting precarious moments. “How long has it been since we paired up?” Rede asked her while he worked on the tents.

“Oh geez…” Calie looked over at him, “A few years at least from when you ‘hired’ me on.” She wasn’t in any of her large plate armor as they hadn’t any plans to be causing trouble anytime soon. Rede found it nice to see her in more form fitting clothes.

Rede chuckled, “Turn out as stupid and boring as you first thought it was going to?” He teased her, “What was it you told me? It was probably a waste of time and a loss of money?”

Calie shook her head at him, “You’re never gonna let me live that down are you?”

“Oh hells no!” Rede immediately replied, “Only since you like it so much.”

Calie rolled her eyes and got back to work, “To be fair, it was a pretty good waste of time the first few months. No one wants to hire just two people for a job normally.”

“We got by well enough.”

“Speak for yourself,” Calie scoffed, “I was about getting ready to ditch your sorry ass before we ran into Shade and Gorgos.”

“Well, glad you didn’t.” Rede smiled at her, “This party would be lost without you.”

Callie laughed, “Oh trust me, I know.”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 Walker had immediately left his friends behind and headed straight to the tavern. With a bit of luck the owner hadn’t changed in the past few years and still owed him. As Walker flung open the doors he was surprised to see just how busy it was in here, being as early in the day as it was. Shrugging to himself he walked to the bar and jumped up onto one of the stools. “Whiskey, straight.” He quickly ordered as he noticed the barkeep, pleased to see it was the same owner.

“Right away, sir gnome-“ The barkeep stopped short as he saw Walker sitting in front of him. His eyes lit up and he walked over smiling to him, “Well I be damned! I didn’t think you’d ever come around these parts by now!”

Walker chuckled, “Just passing through the area with my friends. Honestly surprised you remember me.”

“I’d never forget the face of that gnome who saved my family, my tavern, my life.” He patted the bar in front of Walker, “Wait right here, sir, I’ve got something special in mind just for you.” The barkeep quickly ran down into his cellar before coming back out not long after with a large, dusty, auburn bottle that looked ages old. The barkeep set down the bottle and smiled widely, “I found this gem hidden quite well in a burnt down cabin a year after you helped me out.” He wiped off the dust from the label and turned it to face Walker.

Walker’s mouth dropped wide open. Katak, The Legend. It was by far the rarest whiskey to ever grace the world. There was a multitude of different rumors on who and how these bottles were made, but the truth was that no one really knew. There was no brewery who could lay claim to it, and no family who claim its ancestry. It simply appeared from seemingly nowhere…and sold for exorbitant prices. Walker slowly shook his head, “You…you can’t. I don’t-“

“Shhh.” The barkeep smiled at him, “I can, and I will.” He told Walker, “If you hadn’t spotted that my chest was a mimic I would have lost my life, and if not my life, it would have been the tavern followed by my wife, in which case I would have wished for it to be my life.” He paused for a few seconds, “They are my everything, lad, I’m not sure you understand, but-“

Walker raised his hand silencing the barkeep. He closed his eyes and took a deep, pained breath, “No…I understand. And I would’ve paid the same.” He bit his cheek for a short second before swallowing heavily and opening back up his eyes while grabbing the neck of the bottle, “Thank you.”

The barkeep looked down at the gnome with sorrowful eyes, “I’m sorry for-“

Walker shook his head, “Don’t be. It’s not your fault.” He forced out a smirk, “Plus, I wouldn’t be so good at spotting mimics if not for that…” Walker sighed.

The barkeep nodded at him, “Speaking of mimics…any luck finding one of the ones you were looking for?”

Walker shook his head, “No...trails went cold weeks after I ran into you. Now I travel with some new friends living on a small hope I’ll run across them one day.”

The barkeep beckoned for Walker to lean over for him to whisper in his ear, “Rumors got it that there’s a mimic in Castle Everclare with the human king, another one sneaking around in the elven red light city of Talama, and a third one way out in the trade capitol of Port Phishk.”

Rede nodded at him, “Hmm…no guarantee any of them will be ones that I’m looking for, but it’s always worth a shot. I’ll ask if my party is up for hitting any of those places. Can find good merc work in any of them.”

The barkeep leaned back, “Aye, you all could. Figured I’d do my part to help you on your vengeance quest.” He took a deep breath, “Anyways, shall you crack open that bottle?”

Walker smiled at him, “Pull out two glasses, at the very least you deserve a taste of it as well, my friend.”

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 The sky was painted with pinks and oranges by the setting sun once Shade and Gorgos came running into camp. “What the fuck?!” Rede screamed at them as Gorgos dropped down a pair of dead bodies behind hers and Shade’s tent.

Shade laughed and gave Gorgos a high five, “Gorgos…you are a LIFE saver.” He patted her back smiling.

“Okay…” Calie started to speak up with the tone of a disappointed mother, “We put up with quite a bit of weird…and frankly fucked up shit from you Shade…” She shook her head taking a deep breath, “Why do you have two dead bodies?”

Shade smiled and nodded politely at her, “Thank you for being civil about it.” She said flashing a glare over towards Rede, “I need some parts from their bodies for potion making. Live humans are better, but frowned upon even more. So I use recently deceased ones…it’s not like they need their parts anymore.”

“What the hell potions do you need body parts for?!” Rede shouted at him.

“Oh, so you won’t question it when I collect goblin ears for potions, but now that it’s a body of your own race you care? Huh?!?” Shade shouted right back.

“That’s not!” Rede yelled in frustration, “It’s different!”

Shade shook his head, “Racist.” She mumbled before responding, “Part of my success is no one else knowing many of my elaborate recipes for my concoctions. Even though you could never make any of these, I’m not about to break that trend now.”

“Shade…” Calie shook her head, “Did you steal those bodies?”

“Pffffft!” Shade blew her off, “Don’t worry about it so much! I’ll have taken what I needed from them in no time and will return them right back from where I got them in the middle of the night.”

Calie brought her hands up to her face massaging her temples, “Oh dear gods Shade…we’re never going to be able to return to this town.”

Shade shrugged at her, “And that’s a problem because…?” As both Calie and Rede looked at him  like he was an idiot she continued, “This town is small and honestly way out in the middle of nowhere. We’d probably only return here if we set out to return here anyways!”

“On a principle level though!” Rede groaned at him, “You can’t just go stealing dead bodies!”

“I’m just taking a few parts of theirs!” Shade tried to convince him, “It’s not’”

“Guys!” Calie got their attention, “Guys…let’s just move on with life. Nothing we can do about it now Rede.”

Rede grumbled to himself, “Fine…fine…but DON’T do this again.” He snapped at Shade.

“Well, 1 won’t have to for quite some time after this. So you got a deal.” She faked a smile at Rede, “ No Walker yet?” He asked them.

“Not yet, no.” Calie responded.

“Hopefully he shows up soon, by far the best cook we got.” Shade took a deep breath, “Thanks for setting up camp guys, make’s our life much easier.”

“Yea no problem.” Rede reluctantly spoke up, “We like setting up camp.”

“Cuz you two had sex while doing so!” Walker’s voice caught everyone off guard as he walked into camp.

“Did not!” Rede immediately called out.

“I don’t know about that…” Shade teased him, “I’d believe-“

“You got no room to tease, Shade.” Walker cut him off as well with a smirk, “Anyways, what’d’y’all want for dinner? I’m starving.”

Calie quickly pulled out a huge hunk of cow meat before anyone could speak up, “Got this bad boy on sale today.”

“Hmmm…” Walker eyed it over closely, “Yea yea…that should cook up quite nicely.” He quickly ran over to his tent and pulled out his foldable cooking set, setting it up over the fire that Calie and Rede had previously started. Rubbing his hands together quickly Walker licked his lips, “A-ha!” He called out and grabbed the meat from Calie, “Got a plan.”

“So, Walker,” Rede spoke up, “You find anything exciting in town? Shade found two dead bodies for his potion making.”

“Alchemy.” Shade snapped at him.

Walker chuckled at them, “Not directly no…” He paused for a second, “Do we have an actual destination right now?”

“Nah.” Calie told him, “Just wandering looking for work.”

“Think we could head towards either Everclare, Talama, or Phishk?” He asked them.

“Why…?” Shade asked.

“Might be something of interest in all three of those places for me.” Walker admitted, “I would greatly appreciate it.”

Rede sighed, “We aren’t going to Everclare, but unless anyone else had quarrels with one of the other cities, I see no reason as to why we can’t. We’ll find some good work in either of those.” Everyone else shook their heads at them “Well there we go! Guess we have a destination now, which one would you prefer?”

Walker smiled at them, “Let’s hit up Talama. You all will have much more fun there and I can’t say I really want to return to Phishk.”

“You come from there?” Calie asked him.

“Yep!” Walker told her, “Spent most of my life there.”

“Why don’t you want to return then…?”

“Bad memories…”Walker grumbled, “Bad memories.”

“I can respect that.” Shade nodded at him.

“Anyways, it’ll be awhile before this meat’s all cooked up.” Walker told them as he slaved over it, “I’ll call y’all when it’s done.”

“Thanks, man.” Shade smiled, “I’d like to harvest what I need as soon as possible.” He turned and went with Gorgos behind their tent where the pair of bodies were.

“Where’d you learn to cook?” Calie asked him before she took off.

Walker smirked, “Wife couldn’t cook if her life depended on it and as a crime lord I had to host a lot of different races. I learned on the fly, and quickly became a master chef as well.”

“You have a wife?” Calie was shocked. She had never heard of him having a wife before.

Walker glanced over at her with pain in his eyes, “Now I like to cook to help keep my mind occupied.”

Calie nodded respectfully at him, “I’m…”

“Don’t worry about it, Callie.” Walker grimly told her, “You didn’t know because I don’t like to talk about it.” She sat there in silence staring at him, “I’ll call ya when the food is ready. Rede is waiting for you in the tent.”

“For the record we did not have sex!” She said as she slowly stood up.

“No, but that’s what you’re going to do now.” Walker chuckled as she stomped off towards hers and Rede’s tent.

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