#PERSONALLY I mean
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Practicing #nancywheeler (for more breakfast club AU 👀)
#maybe the nanciest wheeler ive managed to draw#personally I mean#and yes she has her season one hair because I love her season one hair#envy it actually#nancy wheeler#stranger things#my art#doodle of the day#traditional art
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"Hacing a sad backstory makes you better at adventuring" I have never hated Kipperlilly more than when she had that thought
#d20#dimension 20#d20 fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#d20 spoilers#fhjy#fantasy high spoilers#yes it comes from a place of deep insecurity#its just over the line for me i cannot#personally i mean#personally i cannot get behind a person or character that says trauma makes you a better person or givea you an advantage#i dont believe thar at all nor do i think its a helpful belief#but thats just my personal opinion people can deal with their own taruma however they want
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To other people who don't grow beards
Do you ever get a chin hair in like one specific place and it's just a bad sensory experience that you can't rest until it's out, or is my neuro diverging in a new cool way?
#my thoughts#i just had one of these#and I'm at work so i don't have tweezers#so i was just plucking at my face with my fingers until i finally got out#i could never grow a beard#personally i mean#beards look good on other people#but i would not want that on my face
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i know there probably is, but is there an agender asexual aromantic person out there
like
please i cant be the only one
#struggling with the idea that i might be aro too bc it feels like 1 too many non-identities to have#PERSONALLY i mean#like am i actually all these things or am i just depressed
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Man I think I'm gonna start using pixiv again. If you can dodge the bullets (top tier freaks) there's a lot of incredible things there.
#luly talks#the algorithm also FUCKS it's so good#nothing compares fr#i do like some of the freaks tho#also its so cute when i find someone i know from tumblr there dmbfkdbdbsvd#i think i saw tumblr used d//at- soldier and milf//yspamton <- this one im convinced i recognize em#or someone close to em i. am not 100% sure i dont know them#personally i mean#there's also the best baki content ever the retsu and katsumi artist is a god among people#if only i knew chinese and or korean...
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please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!
do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!
#i am so sick of writers having to anticipate the most boring#bad-faith readings of their work. i am like - if you use cheese as a currency#okay! as long as the world makes sense to me: cool. cheese tax. moving on.#my job as the reader is to suspend my disbelief and say okay! i am so sick of like#fanfiction authors having to write dissertations#because they had an interesting idea they'd like to try out!!!#just write it! if it doesn't make sense that's someone else's problem!!!#PS OP is autistic. yes sometimes i take things literally at first glance. then i think about it lol#this is so clearly not about accessibility etc. it's about like. girl even i an autistic person#am able to understand ''they probably didn't mean his eyes darkened LITERALLY''
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i think we should remind musicians they can absolutely make up little stories for their songs btw. it doesn’t have to be about them at all. you can invent a guy and put him in situations to music. time honoured tradition in fact.
#sorry im bored of the same tags on this lmao#sometimes i think the confessional style loses impact because everything has to be excavated from the depths of the soul#and somehow. confessional writing seems to be going with the most disaffected bland sound possible. odd.#i love deeply personal songs! i love when songs sound like they mean something to the artist!#something something wider issue of mining trauma and being performatively vulnerable for quote unquote content#idk i don’t have the actual knowledge to write about this well there’s just something not landing for me recently#mine
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No one tells you when you get a Big Serious Job™ how many fucking abbreviations you’ll be forced to learn.
#or how many abbreviations that you’ll come across that mean something different from what you’ve always known#I stopped reading a requisition to make this post because I read a sentence that was like#‘something something the COR and the contractor POC’#and I stopped like ‘contractor person of color???’ before remembering Point of Contract#also no one at my job tells you what any of this stuff means. they’re just like Morgan can you take care of this DOA?’#and I gotta sit there like Dead on Arrival??? before figuring out it’s a Delegation of Authority spreadsheet
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Changing my belief system from "this is the hill I'll die on" to "this is the hill I'll kill you on" has done absolute wonders for me 10/10 do recommend
#reject martyrdom embrace conquest#or whatever#and i do not mean only actively fighting someone#i mean even just withstanding the enemy on the hill until they decide to go home because they've realized they're beat by your sheer#willpower and devotion to the subject#misc: personal#misc: bestseller
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also worth noting that "abusive" doesn't actually mean "irredeemable" either.
there's a lot of people that have done things in the past that were bad, because they weren't taught any better, or they were in an overall toxic situation where EVERYONE was shitty (like a cult), or they were just at an especially low point and hurt others for it.
you don't have to forgive them. you don't have to ever speak to them again. you can be angry with them until you die if you want.
but society cannot function if we don't allow them to move on. to change their behavior and fuck off somewhere else and build meaningful relationships without bothering you again. we need a path for people to change, or nothing ever will.
#like re: the last post#npd SHOULDNT mean 'youre an abusive person'#but also people who have abused people in the past can still become better people in the present#you know?#and as i metioned vaguely in that post. the way we currently treat people with NPD probably CAUSES THEM to lash out at and abuse others#if u abuse someone they lash back out at you and suddenly theres fun mutual abuse happening#so they need a way out of that cycle
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if you’re ever in the position to choose between giving up and accepting defeat, and actually trying to fight the ancient unkillable god that is about to peel apart reality like a string cheese, remember this: scientifically speaking, you might as well give it a shot!
1.there were trees at the beginning of the world! there were trees so long ago that they predate bacteria that causes wood to decay. when a tree fell, it would lie there in stasis and there wasn’t any way of breaking down wood xylem on a molecular level in that way.
2. it seems obvious to say, but wood eating bacteria are literally incapable of comprehending what they’re breaking down. It’s just not information conciously available to a microorganism. they don’t know what they’re deconstructing, where it came from, bacteria have no way to even fathom the existence of a tree as a concept.
3. Regardless of the facts above, the world we live in today is a world where wood inevitably decomposes
it is worth fighting the unkillable god no matter how pointless it seems. it is worth taking the risk even though youre trying to accomplish something impossible. the reality in which you live was also once reality in which trees didn’t rot. You live in a reality that allows for existence before the possibility of destruction. you live in a reality where uncomprehending microbes break down matter that is so far beyond the scope of their comprehension that it feels comical to specify something so obvious. you live in a reality that occasionally allows unshakeable physical truths to be altered with no warning.
It is worth fighting the unkillable god because trees are so old they predate the source of their destruction, and it still did not spare them. It is worth fighting the unkillable god because bacteria rots unthinkingly, because there is room in our cosmos for destruction without comprehension on the part of the destroyer. It is worth fighting the unkillable god because now and then reality retracts the promise of immortality without fanfare, and when that happens there is no mercy for the ancient. the unmaking is not softer for the desecrators ignorance. for all things, existence is endless until the exact point where it ends.
so you might as well try to kill the unkillable god. it doesn’t seem likely, but at the beginning of the world, trees didn’t rot. so you never know! you never know
#bazinga!#I’ve been meaning to add these tags for a minute but it was too funny to keep the original line bazinga tag#if you see this i would appreciate this post not be tagged as wornld building#and if you want to use this concept in your D&D campaign#you don’t need to show this post or anything#but if you would please mention after the plot line ends that the original post was written all at once in a pretty desperate state#i thought about ginkgo trees while walking my dog late that night#and when i found myself hopeless and completely alone at midnight#I opened tumblr and talked to myself#and hit post#and went to bed#then it got 2000 notes and i woke up to the realization that the entire time I had said bacteria#when i fully meant fungus#fuck!!!#u don’t need to say all that just please include the context that this is a very personal post#thank u!#I’m not mad it’s not obvious from the post that i was ranting into the void
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I'm always seeing this sentiment of "I have got to make my art weirder" or people begging for weirder art but here's the thing, Weird is not a brand. You cannot rack your brains trying to figure out the "Weird" formula. You don't get weird art by artificially forcing whatever you think is "weird." You get weird art (and I think "weird" is sometimes people groping for a way of saying non-corporatized) by figuring out what you like, deep down, even (especially) if you think it's embarrassing and wallowing in it like a pig
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things haven't been great but i think they will be. eventually 🌻🌼🩷
#personal#comics#tw abuse#digital art#personal comic#for the record no i don't think my mother loves me#but the idea that she did kept me in an awful situation for a very long time#the number of times people said “she's your mother. she's trying her best. of course she loves you” etc etc#but i don't think “love” and abuse are mutually exclusive#like even if someone DOES love you it doesn't mean it's not abuse and it doesn't mean it's ok#art tag
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I have had it with this likescolding. “Tumblr doesn’t have an algorithm so likes don’t actually do anything” motherfucker I am not clicking that heart to give some post better ~algorithmic visibility~ I am clicking that heart to help my internet friend microdose on serotonin as god fucking intended
#personal#as in this heart means I will personally give you a big ol kiss#I appreciate that you showed me that thing even if it doesn't fit with the vibe of what I put on my tumblog
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sometimes all you need is one passionate person who goes berserk for your work to keep you creating
#I have 1 person like that with my jn and 1 person like that with my joshaz and their aggressive acclaim means I’m writing more 😂#I mean there’s a few more of y’all too and I have said before I enjoy niche but big passion#I’d rather share in those with the handful of genuine enjoyers of Very Specific ships and dynamics#it’s what makes fandom so memorable and fun for me#anyway#rebloggable
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Look at him. I would die for him. I would kill for him.
Either way — what bliss.
#merthur#bbc merlin#bamf merlin#i mean kinda? more like madman#ok hear me out s1 vs s5 parallels go CRAZY#merlin’s obsession with arthur by s5 … borderline personality worship…. slow descent into madness.. YUM#anyway fellas#we’re so back#more bangers to come
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