#PARTY MONARCH

[worblewobble]

some perfect stranger, my imitation

[phantom-of-the-memes]

So you’re going to have to start on them William coins and notes huh…

[sesamenom]

alright you’ve been extremely extremely kind and indulgent to me about my oc and i cannot possibly thank you enough <333333 so MY turn now to ask YOU about YOURS. please tell me about maglor’s distant granddaughter who is also your bbeg?? .w. or about the chatty hobbits i would very VERY much love to hear about both!!!

~ @nelyoslegalteam, reporting from main <3

(long post, sorry for the random people stumbling upon this lol)

so I'm the dm for the chatty hobbits campaign and essentially it's set in a beleriand-adjacent continent, but with a few extra races and stuff. of the founders of the original settlements, the king of elende (the elf kingdom) is Gil-galad's (invented for the campaign) twin brother Finellach/Finwain. originally he was inspired by the fact that gil galad has a ton of names but only uses ereinion/gil, so I just invented a new character and gave him half the names. I headcanon gil galad as maglor's son, so finwain is in universe maglor's son (left at the havens with gil bc his wife divorced him for kinslaying and his kingdom, being next door neighbors with morgoth, is far too dangerous for small children).

Anyways, his descendant Elinyel (also known as aramire or elinnor) is the current queen of Elende! she's an evil fire-themed bard who is extremely feanorian in all the worst ways - her actual kingdom prospered under her reign, but she just does not care about everyone else as long as she's protecting her people. There were some tensions with one of the major kingdoms to the north (conflict over unclaimed territory between the kingdoms and some tariff stuff), so instead of risking the other kingdom starting a war and hurting her people, she just preemptively invaded it and started burned all the border territories to the ground.

her actual coronation was pretty weird- so she's the second child, but her older sister was born in wartime and there's a general belief in elende that children of peacetime make better rulers, so Elinyel was chosen as her family's heir. her grandfather (the crown prince of his generation) died defending Elende in one of the major wars, but his younger brother and two young kids survived. there's a whole feud between their houses because the brother chose to retain the kingship even after the kids were old enough to take the throne. anyways, two generations later Elinyel killed her cousin Arendil (the previous king of Elende) over a dispute about the legitimacy of his house (and what she believed to be a dishonoring of her grandparents' sacrifice) and took the throne.

obviously she has many Issues. arendil also has two surviving kids who are now essentially trying to stop her from murdering all their neighbors in proactive defense of her people.

however, when she first ascended she recruited her friend group as her elite guard/vassals of the kingdom. (aka the other bosses in the storyline). so it escalated to a war between her forces and the children of arendil, which ultimately culminated in her beloved sister being killed by one of arendil's children. this in turn led to her having basically a massive mental breakdown and feeling like she failed to protect her loved ones (exacerbated by some of her other friends being killed in battles she led). a normal person might decide this is was kind of her fault for starting a war and putting her friends in charge of the army. instead she decided she needed to destroy everyone who could ever potentially pose a threat. which is, in her eyes, literally everyone on the continent (except for her kingdom, of course).

so now she is at war with absolutely everyone of all factions! She is also somehow winning by virtue of Song almost on the level of maglor himself, and ten (now six) also incredibly powerful friends. Anyways, she has decided that the best way to wipe out the continent (except her kingdom) and start fresh is to literally find an ancient lost stone that can break the Doors of Night, summon Morgoth himself, and start the Dagorath. obviously this will Not go well for anyone at all if she succeeds, but she is on a full-on rampage and genuinely believes she (plus friends) can protect her kingdom from Morgoth's army while he wipes out everyone else.

Here's some old art of her btw!

And some slightly more recent unfinished art of her and the Evil Friend Group from when they were younger:

and here's (L-R) her cousin who is the 3rd boss, Elinyel, and her sister from before the war!

[necromycologist]

on one hand i don’t think you can blame nick for any of the destroyer stuff in a way that would hold up in court (and I think he probably punishes himself about it enough already.) but. on the other hand. if biden’s nephew became friends with prince george, fucked off to england, killed(?) a bunch of his employees and vulnerable refugees, conducted what looked like bomb testing on american soil, and then everyone was like “it’s fine because He Was Possessed” you know i would start killing

[benzglen11]

It might

[calamari-minecraft-corner]

dnd!hc!cryptid @ literally all the monarchs: I will string you up by your intestines if you keep being bitches and in fact I would be doing such right now but unfortunately my parents party are against this idea

The monarchs do not take them seriously bc they are tiny and also charisma is their dump stat so they're shit at intimidation

The party knows that they absolutely would do this and in fact that they have a necklace with one of Quackity's teeth and one of Wilburs teeth on it bc they've knocked one out of both of them and keep it as a little trophy of 'I can't blow up or burn down the monarchies because my parents party won't let me but hey at least I can hurt those fuckers' and Spooky is currently holding onto their shoulder in a death grip so that they don't launch themself at 5 of the most power people because they absolutely would lose that fight

And the party has tried just not bringing them to any of the monarchs before because they tend to run their mouth and or try to kill someone but the one time they did that and they were left to their own devices while the adults did politics there was a mysterious fire in Wilbur's castle that was put out rather quickly but was there none the less there, Cryptid didn't confess to starting it but their deception roll certainly wasn't the highest and absolutely no one believes they didn't.

They just really hate Wilbur because 1, he's a monarch, 2 he's an asshole in their opinion, and 3 they don't like how he treats Cala. So yeah so what if they tried to burn his room down? The fucker deserves it their eyes.

Anyway yeah they are a mess and need to stop picking fights when they feel the slightest bit threatened, they get better at it evetually, but wisdom is not their highest stat let me tell you T-T

Catching up to these slowly but hi I keep thinking about this and laughing

I would say though spooky would be completely on board and let them do the crimes as long as they don’t get caught bc she hates those motherfuckers too you have no ideaHDJSSKSK Fundy would be the only one more hesitant (but not condemning bc god he’s so tired) and Dream would just be dark Kermit like “fuckin do it”

Cala would be the only one not condoning it bc she doesn’t want all of them to get executed but she’s doing her best

Also those are very valid reasons not to trust/like King Wilbur bc god he’s the worst but I love him and Cala is doing her best to see the good in people especially that guy who smells like ozone and keeps flirting with her in front of Fundy for some reason

[trashycosmos]

i've gotten into outer worlds in like the last week and Parvati being wlw & ace has been the best thing in the story so far and i will die protecting her and helping her figure stuff out with Junlei

[saltskinandasociopath]

i love one war-crimes hawaiian shirt dad

[incorrectdmp]

Hailey: we have cranberry juice and every day i open the fridge and See It and every time i think about pouring a glass of it and pouring some fucking milk in it and go “hmmm tea”

Grace: ITS NOT HIBISCUS TEA???? it will curdle, I’m positive of this. milk would curdle in hibiscus tea too because of the acidity.

Hailey: AND YET every day i have to fight the urge to put some milk into some cranberry juice

Ezra: Crilk (cranberry milk)

Hailey: CRILK

Ezra: Try it

Hailey: CRILK WILL BE REAL IN RIGHT FUCKING NOW

Hailey: don’t do this don’t do this don’t do this don’t do this

[officialurban]

The Communist Strategy (1950s)

[heir-less]

Marie Chantal Miller using Instagram to post snide commentary about Spare . . . the same woman who was shit-talking Queen Letizia on Twitter a few years back, it seems she didn't learn that no one cares about her or her opinions.

I'm really sick of her and her family of indebted exiles acting as if they're relevant to anything. Be it fashion, social media, or parenting. Maria Olympia is a bootleg Nicola Peltz, who herself is a bootleg Paris Hilton and the entire charade of them pretending to be royalty is a tired and played-out joke. No one who doesn't pay attention to royalty knows who these people are.

[navree]

i should probably write the fic where rhaenyra has more than one brain cell and actually handles blood and cheese in an appropriate manner that doesn't make her seem like a monster

[terraeferaearchive]

"You know... I don't normally like fighting pretty people."

"It's a shame you're not that pretty."

[chemiosmotic]

im gonna play king of the castle monday around 2 pm est! i will drop the link oomfies pls join

[benzglen11]

Pay Attention Monarch 🤴🏻

[sisyphus-prime]

"Kohga isn't a bad guy, just misguided! Just needs to realize Zelda is the good guy" are you not understanding the motivations of the Yiga. I really think you aren't. It's pretty readily handed to you, and somehow you aren't getting it.