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yonkokraven · 3 months ago

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Leak night and A Little Rant: Soulless ending for a Hero Journey (MHA 430 Spoilers)

Horikoshi now I understand why you were afraid that your manga would be cancelled, because you don't deserve that position

Seriously, there are so many things wrong here, not only because you contradicted yourself from the previous chapter and doubled down on making us ignore it completely, but you expect me to feel like this ending is worthy of being called bittersweet when it doesn't qualify as an ending to any of the plots presented.

Midoriya Izuku, someone who at the time I saw the potential to be a Superman, a Spiderman, a genuine hero reduced to a teacher with the same expressionless image for 8 years before being given a suit to be a hero (Which he didn't need because Midoriya's strength without the OFA is already superhuman)

No, I'm not going to start the Rant like this, sorry, but I'm seriously upset with the insult that this chapter has become.

The Chapter

Chronologically, the chapter tells us that time passed normally at the academy before the war, Bakugo adapted to being ambidextrous, Gran Torino seems to have recovered although he probably died at most a year later, Tokoyami and Hawks talking, Aizawa and Mic in the cemetery (unfortunately Aizawa is still alive), the League of Villains book is on sale and several other things.

And then...

“I was able to live a dream that should have been impossible. The story that began when my body moved before I could even think has come to an end alongside the embers of One For All”.

Midoriya loses the last embers of One For All during the last days of the academy as indicated in the full panel, so it seems that he did not become a hero with his classmates.

8 years after graduation, the perspective changes to Dai, this young man who appeared at the beginning of the final war arc. And we have mentions of La Brava (who has her own IT company and is married to Gentle), Doctor Yoshida (the doctor Yoshi) and Hatsume (who seems to have a very renowned Laboratory)

Dai is being bullied for his quirk, and one of his classmates says that now that the number of heroes has stabilized, only the strongest quirks will have a chance in the academies.

Dai says that unlike the others, he did not change, he feels like a child for wanting to be like All Might, Endeavor, Jeanist, Deku or Dynamight, and his insecurity guides him to the Statue of All Might.

There is another scene change that shows us more of the students of class A

Shoji receives an award for resolving prejudiced conflicts in a peaceful manner, and he thanks all the heteromorphs who went to the hospital 8 years ago and who are only there thanks to their will.

Uravity, Ingenium, Froppy and Creati are now a team of heroes (possibly oriented to everyday and rescue situations) who go around the country's schools explaining a new and important aspect of society: the expansion of quirk counseling.

And Eri attends a music club with friends from her school.

Aizawa talks to Midoriya and shows him a video of Bakugo yelling at a civilian for filming him too closely, and points out that this will cause Bakugo to fall in the Ranking and Todoroki to rise (we are told that Shoto works day and night, yet he is still kind to his fans and people)

Shoto is no longer known as "Endeavor's Son", but as his own hero identity.

Aizawa asks Deku if he feels lonely, and Deku answers that since his talk with Fuwa (in chapter 425) he realized that he can use his knowledge and experience to help other people even without having a quirk. And he says he thinks this is a cool way to live.

Midoriya asks Aizawa if he agrees with him, but Aizawa says that he should be strict with his students, since many who enter UA believe that they are guaranteed passage into the profession and tend to become arrogant if there is no one who is strict and corrects their path.

Midoriya says that since graduation he has barely seen his friends as their days off don't coincide. As he walks home, Midoriya looks out at the scene, Tokoyami or Kirishima products on TV screens, or children playing in the street.

One of these children trips and Midoriya goes over to help, and notices Dai coming over as well.

Dai talks to him about his insecurities and how he comes to see the statue of All Might every time he feels that way, and asks Midoriya,

"Can I be a hero like All Might and You?"

Midoriya remembers his conversation with All Might and begins to analyze Dai's Quirk, a Quirk that allows him to create plates from his hair. Dai is somewhat surprised by Midoriya's way of speaking but understands that he is trying to help him.

"Now it's my turn to give people dreams"

Midoriya tells Dai that he will be okay, because he helped that kid and confirms that he can be a hero. The next panel shows us the new statue of All Might with new additions, statues of civilians rooting for him. Midoriya tells Dai to do his best.

"If I said I'm not a little sad, I'd be lying. However, I can at least encourage other people like that. And that was the story of how we all became the greatest heroes."

All Might appears before the chapter comes to an end and destroys the "END" with his own hand.

All Might apologizes for the delay, while Midoriya tells him that he could have met him at the airport, but All Might says that he wanted to give him a surprise gift while explaining that the data collected from his fight against All For One 8 years ago opened up huge possibilities. All Might gives his disciple a Briefcase.

"Technology evolves just like quirks."

Midoriya says it must have cost a fortune, but All Might says it was created by a friend of US (possibly Melissa and her father) and Hatsume, and the expenses were paid jointly by all the students of class A, especially Bakugo.

“Take this to heart, kid. You've earned this power too, fair and square.”

Deku smiles, we get a panel of Bakugo calling Midoriya, and then Hawks being informed about a landslide on a highway and he asks for any heroes who can to report to the place immediately. Midoriya jumps up using his new support and looks down for a moment, seeing the "ghost" of Shigaraki.

The last page is a double spread of Class A as adults in their hero outfits.

"This is the story of how we will continue to reach out."

A Rant

Well, to begin to understand this chapter and give it a proper rant, I summarized it, and for that reason I want to talk about some things and say again that it is a deteriorated ending for how the Manga began.

Things seem to change but at the same time they stay the same, it's basically like raising the sails of a ship to half mast, you go in the same direction, but slower.

Horikoshi doesn't have a clear perspective for Midoriya in the chapter since he alternates protagonism with Dai, this student who barely appeared once

Dai gives us the perspective of the new generation, and again strength prevails over heroism since Hawks didn't start to reward what really mattered, precisely: Heroism.

Midoriya decides that he will be a teacher since he doesn't have a Quirk to practice the profession of hero, a stupid thing because in previous occasions we were shown that Midoriya's physical strength without the OFA was abundant, although it is understood that Midoriya wants to teach we don't see anything about his class or how he teaches.

The heroes are still people without personal lives, and this is highlighted by the little interaction time that Midoriya had with his friends in a span of 8 years, in addition to Shoto patrolling day and night.

The plot of Shoji and the heteromorphs seems to improve as well as that of Uraraka, both being heroes they try to educate civilians so that people like Toga are helped or the heteromorphs can live with dignity.

Spinner released his book but we didn't see a reaction from the people, but from Compress who had no relevance in this manga.

There is something very wrong with all this and it is that they build us up to the idea that change will happen in the long run, when Horikoshi had the means to immediately begin said changes (And no, I'm not referring to civilians).

Midoriya should have had recognition and interviews for his motivations, even if you don't want to tell the whole story Midoriya would say that he brought Shigaraki to where he was (ridiculous reason but it would be a way to justify it) and people would stop looking the other way

Uraraka could have done what she does now from the academy and interviews, but you didn't allow it either.

Shoji and the heteromorphs was a beautiful plot but you did everything so off-screen that it loses the impact of these two panels that you dedicated to the chapter.

Hawks is now at the head of the commission, and the only thing you did was fix half the problem by adding the top "Eiyuu" when you should also have eliminated the old top that makes people perceive power as something rewardable.

And do you know, readers, why all this is happening? Because Horikoshi most likely has a sequel prepared, because if not, it would not explain the amount of inconsistencies that arose in this last final arc and later this attempt at an epilogue (It literally still makes me sick that he wasted the portal resource like that.)

I would detail for the umpteenth time the inconsistencies when writing the League of Villains or the lack of evolution outside of panels, but you already know my opinion about that and more.

I only hope that on August 5th the news is not a sequel or I will have to mentally prepare myself to see another decade of inconsistencies.

and yes, Deku will have a new OFA in part 2, the ghosts (Shigaraki) don't appear on the street just because.

#bnha critical #mha critical #mha 430 #bnha 430 #hori is a bad writer #bnha leaks #mha leaks

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nevertheless-moving · 4 days ago

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binged dungeon meshi anime + manga after numerous tumblr posts and leg injury. thoughts based on fandom > manga> anime ride:

[SPOILERS FOR MANGA]

senshi pantyshot fanservice much appreciated but... should really be more lingering and inexplicably glistening if its gonna match up to fanservice in other animes

no yeah TOTALLY get why toshiro just said fuck it and went home after... all that. days of no food. blase dark magic/you were too late reveal. long repressed slapfight that he probably felt equally guilty and angry about. girl he loved appeared as GIANT MONSTER and BRUTALLY killed HIS FAMILY.

girl he loved STOPPED TO PULL HER TITS OUT midway through BRUTALLY KILLING HIS FAMILY.

i'd go home too

also , Maricelle, all the love in the world, but i get why everyone was mad about the dark magic. i mean it looked bad. WE know that thistle interfered but the situation looked BAD ngl maricelle i would not want you healing me either after falin appearance.

feel like changeling maricelle should have been half half-foot/half-dwarf or something like that. would have been fun half-elf reveal to party. actually bothers me that she wasn't? the more i think about it. i mean itzumi was still cat/kobold.

incredibly belated but looking back at changeling episode...is senshi shirtless the whole time???

okay nevermind did some extensive research and i'm fairly sure he wasn't

also thinking back about senshi — he absolutely knew what he was doing with setting off the traps and pissing chilchuck off...my man was living here for decades.

kabru/laois is both more and less textually present than i would have thought based on fandom.

like on one hand they barely interact. on the other hand they barely interact and Kabru is VERY much obsessed . they have ONE (1) conversation. much hilarity has been observed about that dialogue so i digress

and there is ZERO new information between that interaction and kabru planning on putting the man on a THRONE. at some unclear point his career goal becomes having his lips at this man's ear and a dagger at his neck ???

i cannot stress this enough: he invests SO EARLY in king Laios. willing to sacrifice his life for this to be realized. goal oriented. unhinged. good for him.

you could say it's just him being practical and choosing the best option based on available information but incredibly relevant new information becomes available and Kabru is STILL locked in

i'm crying over kabru 'compressing' mithran's backstory. sure as a meta framing device fine. but in universe? BONKERS. narrative critiquing clinically depressed man's tragic backstory. Super normal move.

so much nuance and different perspectives on fantasy interracial marriages and adoptions and its SO SO GOOD.

gnawing on the walls kinda worldbuilding seriously

so thistle was a teenager when this all started. that's what i'm getting. that's... man there's a lot of layers of tragedy.

wait so if elves and half-foots look ambiguously young do tallmen look ambiguously old?? wrinkly gangly old old wrinkly fuckers??? or burning the candle at both ends terrible looking tall child???

hey i'm starting to think that the monster who controls all monsters... might not be a good guy

'Delgal' holding thistle at the end ... i'm not crying. you're crying.

impossible to say if laois won the final battle on purpose or not

genuinely no idea

11/10 no notes about that fact

#dungeon meshi #nevertheless meta #dungeon meshi spoilers #drafted in july #delicious in dungeon

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stellar-constellations · 10 months ago

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(Very late) Christmas special! Yuri Briar

Yuri Briar x Fem! Reader

Beware! This fic DOES contain SPOILERS for the manga and for the Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series: An Alliance (part 1)!

This can be read with or without reading my Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series: An Alliance (part 1).

Series information: Setting is AFTER the reader rejoined WISE (so Yuri and [Y/N] are married and [Y/N] becomes an official double-spy).

This is NOT a replacement or part 10 for the Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series!

The city air smelt like hot chocolate and roasted chestnuts. The town’s street lamps were decorated with yellow christmas lights and green wreaths. Children squished their faces against the cold windows of toy stores, gazing at what they want on their Christmas lists. Candies filled with marshmallows and peppermint advertised at the local grocery store. Yuri and I strolled through the town hand-in-hand, looking for gifts for the Forger family.

“Do you have any idea what they’d want for Christmas?” I questioned, looking into store windows for anything that caught my eye.

“I’m not sure. Yor said that she was fine with anything.” Yuri spoke, just as lost as me.

“Well what about Loid and Anya?” I asked, turning my head to look at Yuri.

“Do we have to buy them gifts?” Yuri grimaced.

“They’re family.” I huffed. “Don’t be mean. And don’t even think about going to the Christmas party with an attitude to Loid. I’ll whack you.” I threatened.

“I don’t even know what we’d give Loid. He’s so… reserved?” Yuri spoke. “He doesn’t talk much about himself other than work.”

“I see what you mean.” I hummed. “So work is obviously an important thing in his life.”

“His main priority should be caring for Yor…” Yuri huffed.

“We can talk about this later. The shops will close early because it's Christmas Eve, so we have no time to be complaining about stuff like that.” I pointed out. "Loid values work, we could get him something for work. Like, maybe a new journal to write notes? He is a psychiatrist after all.” I suggested.

At least his public cover is. I thought to myself.

I tried to think more deeply on what Twilight likes without accidentally revealing to Yuri that I know him more than just his sister's husband. Of course I know things about him that Yuri and Yor won't, I did basically grow up with him almost my entire life, so I consider him like a brother and my best friend. The more I thought about it, the more I realized I basically knew nothing of Twilight's interests or hobbies. He's always been so work-oriented compared to my laid-back nature.

My realization led me to questioning everything I knew about Twilight. Is the personality I've associated with him almost my whole life a cover personality? Am I such a bad sister and best friend that I don't even know his favorite damn color? What he likes to do in his free time?

While I had an internal existential crisis, Yuri dragged me out of my thoughts.

"Hey, there's a bookstore over there. We can go find Loid's journal there?" Yuri suggested, pointing his finger at a small bookstore.

"Yeah, okay." I nodded, dragging Yuri into the store with me. "Along with a journal, we can get Loid a book too. I'm just unsure of what types of books he'd enjoy."

"We have to get him more than one gift?" Yuri sighed, obviously displeased at the idea.

"Just wait till we get to Anya." I hummed. "She's a child, so she should get the most presents."

"When I was a kid, I didn't celebrate Christmas." Yuri pointed out.

I did. Growing up as a West spy, the Handler would put time aside and host a Christmas party at HQ. She made sure to give small gifts to all spies (most likely to avoid promotions). Since I was a kid and the youngest on the team, she made sure my gifts were a little more special than my fellow spies. I remember the first year I joined WISE, she gifted me a warm sweater with comfortable short fur inside and the exterior was soft and gray, along with a raspberry candy cane. I cried so hard that day because I was so touched she bothered getting me something despite our relationship being something of a teacher and student. Now a days, I see her more of the closest thing I have to a mother in my life, and I make sure to give her a present every year too.

Speaking of the Handler, I need to find a gift for her too. I might be able to sneak out later and buy something while Yuri is sleeping. I thought to myself.

"Maybe a book on psychology?" Yuri questioned.

"No. I wanna get him something for him to enjoy that's not all work-related." I spoke.

Besides, me and him already know quite a bit of psychology as it is. I thought.

Maybe something like mystery? No, he'd figure out the mystery too quick. Suspense? No, he'd just get mad at the character's decisions for being stupid. Romance? Nope, he seems to have little interest in the subject. Maybe something dystopian? Eh, we've faced a war together and live under oppressed governments with the possibility of war, we have our own silent dystopian going on. Maybe something involving self-help, like how not to be robotic. It'd be a good gag gift, but like I said, I want him to enjoy it. Historical? No, we know just about everything in history.

"Ah! Science fiction!" I exclaimed loudly.

"Like... robots?" Yuri questioned.

"I dunno, maybe. I think Loid would enjoy the genre." I spoke.

"How so?" Yuri questioned.

"He's smart, he is a psychiatrist after all. He'll probably like something that's mixed with reality but still have hints of fiction in it. Smart people like smart things like science! It'd be something to get his brain working and still enjoy it." I spoke.

"Pssh, anyone can listen to a person's problems and give out solutions." Yuri huffed.

"That's not all they do, Yuri. They also—" I paused, deciding it wasn't worth going in depth. "Ah, never mind. Let's just find something good for him to read."

Me and Yuri walked to the science fiction section, looking for anything that caught our eyes. Yuri didn’t exactly do much of the searching since it included being “too buddy-buddy with Loi-Loi” so I did the searching myself.

“Oh, what about 1984? I heard that was good.” I spoke. “I remember hearing it was featured in the newspaper, it’s relatively new, published in 1948.”

I might steal this after Twilight finishes reading it. I thought to myself.

“Yeah, sure.” Yuri spoke.

“Hm… what do you think Yor would like? I was thinking of giving her a new set of earrings as my gift. What’s on your mind?” I questioned.

“Well… she likes apples, specifically this Whistle Candy we had as kids, the apple flavored ones.” Yuri explained.

“That’s a good start. We can go to the market and buy those.” I smiled. “I want to stop by a jewelry store and buy her a set of gold earrings, I noticed her jewelry was gold so I figured she’d might appreciate it.”

“You noticed.” Yuri spoke, tears in his eyes.

“Why are you tearing up?” I questioned, a little confused.

“Just… you’re so thoughtful of her too. She loves you so much as her sister-in-law so it’d make her so happy to know you paid attention to her interests.” Yuri cried, wiping his nose.

I resisted the urge to tell him I was observing her to make sure she wasn’t an obstacle in STRIX’s mission or a hazard to Twilight’s mental health (now that I’ve spent time with her, I’m aware she’s a wonderful person, but I was on my guard when we first met, especially knowing how hard she can hit someone).

“Of course I care, Yuri. She’s family to me, just like Anya and Loid are.” I smiled.

The names of his sister’s husband and daughter leaving my lips immediately dried his eyes and made him grimace. “Blegh…”

“Wow. I should use that more against you when you’re upset if it makes you forget what you were crying about in the first place.” I smiled, a little impressed.

“Don’t you use those two… imbeciles... against me.” Yuri threatened, a glint in his eyes.

“Yeah, yeah.” I hummed. “Let’s find an empty notebook now. I'm thinking something blue, or blue and white."

Yuri nodded as we walked together, looking around to find a journal. I've seen empty journals in bookstores before, so surely this bookstore can't be an exception. I took Yuri to the front of the bookstore where there would usually be little souvenirs or many pens. I found a plain midnight blue journal and held it up to Yuri.

"What do you think?" I questioned.

"Looks like a journal." Yuri spoke.

"Helpful." I hummed sarcastically, before opening the journal.

I felt the texture of the pages and the cover, along with the page colors, the spacing and colors of the lines, and the sturdiness of the spine before deeming it acceptable.

"Okay, Yuri. Let's go pay for these then we can go for Yor's presents." I spoke.

Yuri nodded, grabbing my hand as we walked to the cash register together.

"How about you pay for Loid's and Anya's gifts, and I'll pay for Yor's? Her earrings will probably be expensive." Yuri spoke.

"I mean, I have certain earrings I'm looking for, so I can buy them." I explained.

"No. I got them. Loid's and Anya's gifts will probably tally up to around the earrings price." Yuri explained.

"And you wanna buy your sister's presents yourself?" I smiled.

"Yes." Yuri admitted quickly.

"Well, if you really insist." I sighed, deciding it wasn't worth fighting him.

When we got to the cashier, I took out my wallet from my purse and handed the cashier the amount of dalc they wanted from me. The bagged the books and handed it to me, telling us "happy holidays" as we left.

"Okay. Let's go to the jewelry store first, then the grocery store for that whistle candy you were talking about." I hummed, rearranging the fluffy red scarf wrapped around my neck.

Yuri nodded as I grabbed his red mitten, having him follow me. During our walk, I looked around at the shop windows to see if I could find any present for Yuri. I wasn't exactly sure what to get him; he was a pretty simple guy who'd love just about everything I'd give him, but I wanted to give him something that was actually meaningful and something he could really enjoy. The problem is Yuri doesn't have many interests besides Yor and work, so I'm really limited with potential gift ideas.

"Why are you glaring at me like that?" Yuri questioned, confused.

"I'm cold." I lied.

I'm glaring at you because you're a troublesome brat to make happy. I thought.

"Even in all those layers? We'll be at the store soon enough, so don't worry." Yuri spoke.

I nodded, thinking of what I could get him. Maybe he likes whistle candy like Yor? But that's so boring, not to mention unoriginal since we're getting Yor it. I could get him something like a candle? But that's not long lasting, and I have no idea what his favorite scents are.

"Yuri, I'm thinking of changing my perfume sometime soon. What do you think I should go with?" I questioned.

"I don't know? Something floral or citrus like most perfumes? It's your perfume." Yuri hummed.

"Yeah, but I want your input. You're my husband so I don't want to get a scent you don't like." I explained.

"I doubt there's a perfume that I don't like. Just don't have it too strong?" Yuri spoke.

Sometimes I wanna punch his stupid face for being so damn hard to shop for. Seriously, how can someone simple be such a challenge to shop for? Even Twilight is easier to shop for!

Yuri and I walked to the store to get the whistle candy Yuri said Yor liked. During the time, I thought of what good gifts Anya would have. I wanted to spoil the kid and give her a good Christmas. I've always wanted to be a cool aunt but now that I lost my entire family I can't do that anymore.

No, I didn't lose my entire family, only a part of it. I still have Twilight and the Handler, and Yuri and Yor and Anya. My mother is still out there too, somewhere in this world. The thought left me feeling a little better from the other sudden intrusive depressing thought I had.

Anya likes peanuts and stuffed toys, I know that. She likes that one spy tv show too, whatever it was called. The episodes I watched with her are a little interesting, I might watch it myself to be honest (perhaps I can learn a thing or two I'm unaware of). I briefly thought about getting her a coat or a cute dress, but then I remembered being a kid and disliked getting clothes as gifts. She does like sweets too.

Oh! They have dog too! I remember Twilight telling me about that, trying to train it to attack on command. Apparently the dog is a rescue from Project Apple, where he was trained along with many other dogs to become highly intelligent military animals. I wonder if the dog is huge and scary, like a German Shepard or a Pit Bull with that kind of reputation? Hey, maybe I can convince Yuri to get a dog or a cat!

Wait, focus. We're here for gifts.

"Yuri, when we get the candy let's go to the toy section next." I spoke.

"Aren't you a bit old for toys?" Yuri smirked, earning him a glare from me.

"Shut it." I huffed. "It's for Anya, I wanna see if there's any good toys around here she might like. I always wanna get her peanuts and stuffed animals."

"Peanuts?" Yuri spoke, making a face. "What kid wants peanuts for Christmas?"

"Apparently Anya." I shrugged. "Don't question it, kids are weird and have weird Christmas lists. Besides, it's better than like, I dunno, a 20 dalc dolly or something."

"I guess that's true." Yuri hummed, grabbing a bag of candy from the shelves.

It was the whistle candy Yuri was talking about. It's comes in a pack of eight circular candies with a hole in the middle. Yuri grabbed two apple flavored packs, holding them in his hands since we didn't grab a cart.

"Hey, it looks like the American candy Life Savers!" I pointed out. "This whistle candy you speak of, does it actually make you whistle?" I questioned, glancing at the candies.

"Yeah. You can whistle through them." He nodded.

"That's cool." I smiled.

I took a look at all the candies, grabbing a few chocolate peanut candy bars and other candies like gummy bears, Fun Dips, marshmallow Circus Peanuts, and Jolly Ranchers before my eyes spotted a familiar and bittersweet candy—M&M's.

"Oh hey, I remember these!" I spoke, grabbing a tube. "Hey Yuri, do you know how these were invented? Or more specifically why?"

"Wasn't it something about the war?" Yuri questioned.

"Yeah. During the war, normal chocolate bars couldn't be transported or eaten because it'd melt in the heat, so Ostanian soldiers couldn't eat them. Forrest Mars Sr copied the idea of Rowntree's Smarties, a British-made sweet small chocolate candies covered in hardened sugar syrup, when he saw soldiers from the Spanish Civil War eating them." I explained. "I had a buddy who would eat these like no tomorrow." I chuckled, before frowning.

Well, I guess he did eat them like no tomorrow, cause he's not alive anymore.

I remember infiltrating a small town and killing a couple Ostanian soldiers. Rancher was looting the bodies to see if there was anything interesting or see if there's any extra ammo that matched his gun model. While he didn't find ammo that could be shot with his gun, he did find a small brown and tan tube with the title "M&M's" on the tube. He opened it and ate one of the small candies, then he became hooked and popped them in his mouth like a pill junkie. Sometimes, I think he killed soldiers just to see if he could find some of that candy on them.

Yuri noticed how my smile faded and patted my shoulder, an attempt to console me. While it didn't quite work, I was happy to know he was trying, especially considering that war was where he potentially lost his parents and started his hate for the West. He doesn't talk about them, but I can naturally assume he lost them in the war considering Yor was the one who raised him.

"Do you have a favorite flavor?" I questioned, breaking the silence.

His hand left my shoulder as he thought, before speaking, "Maybe cherry?"

I nodded, making a mental note in my head for later.

"Well, we got the candy. Let's head to the toy section and see what's there." I smiled, keeping the M&M's in my hand along with the other candies I grabbed.

We both walked to the toys as I tried and figured out what toys I wanted to buy for Anya. I didn't want something lame or boring, and I didn't want to give her something too generic that every other kid has. Knowing Twilight, he probably got her stuff that's popular with the other kids along with things she liked, I wanna give her something meaningful other than snacks.

I noticed the toy guns and thought about getting her a toy cap gun, a small toy that made a small bang to represent a bullet and came with it's own bang roll cap refill that even made a smell, before I realized that not only would they have to purchase more paper roll caps every time it ran out, but I also didn't want to influence her with violence and guns (especially after I heard about her punching Donovan Desmond's son, Damian). I thought about those toy handcuffs, before realizing how boring they were since she couldn't really do anything with that when playing alone. Maybe snap-its? Nah, I don't want her throwing it at her parents or other kids, not to mention the hassle it is to clean them up. Maybe I can code a little morse robot for her to learn morse code (by me coding, I mean Franky).

I decided to ditch the entire idea of spy things in general, she's too young for such things, and I don't want her to start getting suspicious of Twilight and I's second-lives, children have an insane ability of calling out bullshit and having some damn accurate hunches. Maybe if I find pajamas or a jacket of her spy show, I'll buy it.

I grabbed multiple different teddy bears, a blue one (Twilight), a pink one (Anya), a red and white one (Yor), a red and black one (Yuri), a white one (their dog Bond) and a grey one (me) to represent her family. You can't do much with stuffed animals, so I grabbed other toys too such as a rainbow slinky, a Candy Land board game, silly putty, dominoes, and some coloring books.

"Does a kid really need that much toys?" Yuri questioned.

"Yes. Yes she does." I nodded. "This is her first Christmas with us! Christmas is a day that kids are always thinking about, she deserves a good one."

"Well, if you think so." Yuri sighed, deciding not to fight on the matter.

Yuri carried most of the toys while I carried most of the candy. I noticed the struggle between us and mentally scolded ourselves for not getting a basket, it sure would've made this whole process easier.

"Why don't we get a wagon?" I questioned. "Like a toy wagon for Anya?"

"That's stupid. What would she use that for?" Yuri questioned.

"Don't call it stupid without hearing what I gotta say." I huffed. "It can be used to carry her toys around the house, or when she's out and about with Loid and Yor, she can sit in the wagon as they roll her around—it's cute and convenient." I explained.

"Sure, whatever you want." Yuri waved off.

Yuri just doesn't understand the importance of Christmas. For an energetic and cheerful kid like Anya, Christmas probably means a lot to her. I remember when I was a little kid and still had the income, I was excited for Christmas too; Yuri probably stopped caring for Christmas when Yor started raising him instead since they would need to direct their funds to something nonessential that doesn't include food or shelter, so I can see his perspective on this matter.

Even though he doesn't quite care about Christmas, I still want to be able to buy a gift for him, I mean, I have some festive spirit this year and I'm excited to spend Christmas in a place that's not Wise HQ with people I have genuine attachment to outside of work.

Me and Yuri grabbed a red toy Radio Wagon, placing all of Anya's (and Yor's) candies and toys inside of it. I also grabbed a classical music and a IIse Werner vinyl record for Loid. I thought and decided that I'll come back to the store later when searching for Yuri's gifts, that way I can get Franky and The Handler a gift too. We grabbed red and white striped wrapping paper (Yuri’s choice) and white snowflake wrapping paper (my choice, along with green and blue ribbons. We also grabbed Bond some treats, I heard he was a big dog so I got him large bones and chew toys.

Yuri rolled the wagon to the receptionist as I followed, paying for all the gifts and gift paper. We paid and left the store, heading to the jewelry store next. I wanted to get Yor a set of earrings. I noticed she wore gold spike-like earrings (the only set I've seen her wear really), so I wanted to get her a different pair instead, a pair where me and her match together so that the gift is meaningful. Yuri rolled the wagon down the streets as I guided him to a jewelry store, opening the door for him so he can walk in with the wagon as I advanced.

"Do you have a set of earrings in mind?" Yuri questioned.

"Yep. I have a perfect vision for what I want." I nodded.

I spent three days going to every jewelry shop to try and find the perfect set of earrings for Yor that I actually liked and that would match her taste. It took some work and searching, but I found The Set. I lead Yuri to the jewelry shop I wanted to go to called "Himmlischer Ketten."

"The wagon is probably going to be troublesome inside of the shop, so you just wait outside with it, okay?" I spoke.

Yuri looked at me with a blank face, thinking, before making a pout.

"But I wanna see what you're buying for Yor." He whined.

"I'll show you after I pay for it. I'll be in and out in a flash, you'll barely know I left." I smiled.

Yuri sighed, his pout still relevant on his face but it had decreased, "Fine. Just hurry up."

I nodded and walked into the store, looking around to find the set of earrings again. I found the ones I was looking for and told the jeweler, grabbing my wallet from my purse and payed for the price. I also got the second set of earrings so Yor and I could match together. She handed me the two boxes of jewelry inside, handing them to me in a small bag. I walked back out to Yuri and placed the bag of jewelry inside the wagon where the rest of the gifts were.

"How much did it cost?" Yuri questioned.

"One hundred dalc in total." I answered.

Yuri reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet, handing me a bit over 100 dalc.

"Whaddya doing?" I questioned as he took my hand, placing the currency in my palm.

"I told you earlier that I'd pay for the jewelry." He spoke.

"Yeah, but it's my gift to Yor." I pointed out. "Besides, I got a set for myself too."

I can very well pay for it too since I'm working two government jobs...

"Consider it one of your Christmas presents." He reasoned. "Besides, you spent enough at the store for Anya and Loid."

"Wow, you actually said his real name without much thought." I chuckled, causing him to glare at me.

"Shut up. It just came out of my mouth before I could stop it." He huffed.

"Sure, hon." I smiled.

"Doesn't matter, let's get home and get these presents wrapped." He spoke quickly, changing the subject as he rushed ahead of me, dragging the wagon with him.

He can be such a tsundere at times... I thought. Though I guess it's a little endearing in its own stupid way.

I followed Yuri back to our apartment, getting home and wrapping the presents in our chosen gift papers we bought. Yuri did the wrapping while I placed bows and ribbons on the boxes since it turns out, I'm terrible at wrapping presents. I wrote the names of who the presents belonged too (most belonging to Anya, but it's still fun to write the names).

Yuri and I conversed as we did our own assigned roles together.

"You sure like going out for Christmas, huh?" He commented.

I hummed, thinking of the comment and what to say to that.

Perhaps I'm making up for loss time? I don't have a family I can spoil, so I should spoil this one while it lasts. I might not live long being this double-agent, whether I get backstabbed from one of my jobs (most likely the SSS), or whether I die on a mission, or even just some sickness or such, I want to die knowing I at least meant something to someone, or die someone I can be semi-proud of. It's not like there's much I can ask for in life after all I've done, or even deserve much really. Sometimes I wonder if I should even be allowed to enjoy myself with this family, even if it'll potentially be my death.

Oh well, I guess it's a bridge I'll cross (or jump off) when the time comes.

"I like Christmas. I like the pretty lights, the snow, and buying presents for people I care about." I spoke, deciding to go for a simple answer.

It's not technically a lie or anything, so I'll go with it.

Yuri nodded, cutting wrapping paper for one of Anya's stuffed animals to wrap with. "Well, I think it's kinda endearing. You seem very excited when you were choosing the gifts, and I could tell that you were putting much thought into it."

I blinked, surprised at his sudden adoring words.

"Are you tryna get something outta me? Like a hint for your gift or a kiss?" I joked teasingly, choosing to ignore how my heartbeat sped up at his words.

"I don't got any ulterior motives. I was just pointing out an observation of mine." He huffed, his face turning red.

"Well, thanks." I chuckled. "I guess I just like Christmas so much since I didn't really experience much of it as a kid."

That's true, even when I still had my parents, Christmas wasn't much except a few toys and candy. Buying presents for five kids a lower-class town like Luwen, it was hard to find money to spoil my siblings and I with when we had to pay for necessities like food or water.

"Well, you can experience it more now." Yuri smiled. "Besides, Chihuahua Girl will probably appreciate the gifts, even if she is spoiled enough just being in Yor's presence." He huffed, envious of his niece's everyday life.

"You're weird." I sighed, placing a blue bow on one of the white snowflake-wrapped gifts. "But I guess that's kinda my fault for agreeing to marry you." I chuckled, writing Anya's name onto the present.

"I'm not that bad." He huffed. "I think I'm a pretty good husband."

"Whatever floats your boat." I teased, causing him to send a pouting glare at me. "I'm just messing with you, honey." I laughed.

"I know that." He lied defensively.

"Sure." I hummed. "Let's finish this up so that we can make some desserts for tomorrow. I don't want Loid and Yor to do all the cooking."

He nodded, agreeing. "Yeah, I'm ready to get all this done and go to bed so we can see Yor." He smiled.

"And Loid and Anya." I added.

"Ugh..." He groaned, his face contorting into disgust. "Yeah... those two."

We continued finishing up wrapping the gifts until we finally finished, heading to the kitchen and preparing sweets and appetizers together. When we finished, we put them in containers and aluminum foil, calling it a night. While Yuri slept, I carefully snuck out of bed and changed clothes, sneaking out of the apartment to go get gifts for Franky and the Handler. I got the Handler red camellias and dutch chocolates with a red envelope that has a thank you card and 100 dalc. I got Franky the same thing too, except I gave him an extra 100 dalc so he could have extra money for his inventions.

Speaking of Franky's inventions, I decided to go to Franky's place to give him his gifts (and get a favor out of him). After spending the whole day with Yuri and trying to figure out what to get him for Christmas, I finally came up with the perfect gift idea. I walked to Franky's apartment and knocked on his door, waiting a minute or two before he opened the door.

Franky looked surprisingly awake for it being two in the morning.

"Oh? I didn't expect you to be awake." I spoke, a bit surprised.

"I'm working on some new inventions. Did you need something?" Franky questioned.

"Actually, I have something for you..." I spoke, handing him yellow roses.

"Oh? Really? Thanks!" he smiled, accepting the bouquet. "What's the occasion?"

"Merry Christmas." I cheered. "Did you forget or something?"

His face paled as he turned his attention to the calendar on his wall. "It's Christmas Eve already?!" he exclaimed.

"What?! You didn't know?!" I shouted back, surprised. "How long have you been cooped up here working your ass off?!"

"I don't know?! Maybe the 14th? Or... or like the end of November?" He spoke, his brain looked to be scrambled.

"Sheesh man, take a break from work." I suggested (more so demanded).

"Yeah... Good idea..." He sighed. "Uh, you wanna come in?"

"Yeah, I got a favor to ask anyways." I accepted as Franky opened his door wider, allowing me to slip in.

"Just don't mind the mess." He spoke, having no embarrassment.

It's not the first time I've seen his place like this. I've known him since the war, and we rekindled when I joined WISE, so I've seen him in this pitiful state many times. A good inventor is always has a scrambled brain (or workspace).

"So, what's the favor? Do you need me to get intel or something?" he questioned, sitting down on his blueprint map-scattered couch.

"I actually need help learning something." I spoke. "You know how to weld, right?"

"Of course I do. I've invented all sorts of powerful and useful machines and inventions." He smiled pridefully, glad to boast.

"Can you teach me how to weld? I wanna make something for my husband for Christmas, and I wanna do it myself so that it's more meaningful." I explained.

"Huh... So Twilight was lying when he said you and Briar's marriage was fake?" Franky commented.

"Oh..." I paused, thinking.

Well, shit. I kinda completely forgot about that.

"Well... we got recently engaged, however it's best not to tell Twilight. You know how he is, 'don't form attachments' and yada yada." I spoke quickly.

"Yeah, that's Twilight there." He spoke, before smirking pridefully. "Once again, you and Twilight come to me for help, pleading for my assistance."

"Dude, don't start it." I sighed. "I don't got time for this. I gotta get this done in at least six hours, so I need you to help me get it done as quickly and as perfect as possible."

"Six hours?!" he spluttered. "How do you believe that I can teach you all about welding in six hours?!"

"Don't teach me everything! Just what I need to know to get this done!" I retorted.

"Fine. Fine. Let's hurry up, I wanna get back to my inventions as fast as possible." He sighed. "Do you have an idea on what you're trying to make?"

"I got the perfect thing." I nodded.

Franky helped me create the perfect gift I had in mind. Surprisingly, it ended with not much cuts or burns, so I feel happy about that. I only needed three band-aids for my fingers! I gave Franky an extra 200 dalc for all the trouble. In total he's received 400 dalc from me for Christmas, so I don't ever want him to complain about helping me again. I also convinced Franky to give my gifts to the Handler since I wasn't going to WISE's HQ anytime soon (and I didn't want to be stuck giving an update on what's going on with the SSS. I want to enjoy the holidays, not think about work).

I made it back home to Yuri and I's apartment, deciding to ditch sleep since Yuri will be awaking soon; I don't want him to know I snuck out while he was sleeping and if I sleep now then I certainly won't wake up in time for the Christmas party. I changed back into my pajamas so that it looked like I never went anywhere, and I used some light makeup to hide the evidence of no sleep under my eyes. I decided to get started on breakfast since I wouldn't be sleeping, making apple pancakes, sausage, and coffee.

Yuri came out of our room in his pajamas and bedhead, looking a bit tired but refreshed (compared to how I currently feel).

"Morning." He yawned.

"Morning, hon." I smiled, placing breakfast on the table. "How'd you sleep?"

"Slept good, though it felt a little cold last night..." He spoke. "Must be cause of the winter weather."

"Yeah, I thought the same thing too." I agreed, ignoring the fact he was so in tune with my body heat that he subconsciously knew I was missing during his slumber.

"What are you doing up so early? It's unlike you to be awake in the morning." Yuri questioned, taking his seat at the dinner table.

"I was so excited for the Christmas party, I couldn't sleep." I lied, taking my own seat at the table.

Yuri and I ate our breakfast, Yuri doing the dishes afterwards since I cooked. To pass the time, we did our own things such as reading and watching TV in the living room together, waiting until it was time to get ready and leave.

When it was time to leave, I changed out of my pajamas and grabbed a grey coat and red scarf to protect myself against the cold. Yuri and I grabbed the sweets and appetizers we made together yesterday; pfannkuchen, bethmännchen, and bratkartoffeln.

Yuri and I walked to the apartment, Yuri dragging Anya's wagon filled with all the gifts while I carried all the food, my gift for Yuri inside of my purse. We made it to the apartment and I watched Yuri struggle to find a good angle to pick up the wagon and carry it up the steps (no, I didn't help him, I wanted him to suffer a little since it was so hard trying to find the perfect Christmas gift for him). When we got to the Forger's front door, Yuri knocked for us, being greeted by Twilight and Yor.

"Yuri! (Y/N)! Welcome back! Always good to see you!" Yor greeted, a big smile on her face.

"Hi-ya, sis!" Yuri cheered.

"Thank you for coming. Come in." Twilight spoke, opening the door further, causing Yuri to glare at him once he realized Twilight was present.

I placed the food down on the table as Yuri placed the wagon near the Christmas tree in the living room. Anya was sitting on the ground near the TV watching her spy cartoon while the Forger's dog laid next to her.

"Hi, buddy." I smiled, crouching down and slowly placing my hand near his nose so he could sniff me. "You're a good boy, huh?" I spoke, petting his head as he let out a 'borf!' "Hi, Anya." I greeted, sitting down on the couch as Yuri took a seat next to me.

"Hi, Auntie." Anya spoke, keeping her eyes on the TV screen.

Yuri looked disinterested in the show while I stared at it every now and then. Yor joined us on the couch and talked with us as Twilight was in the kitchen cooking, jumping into the conversation easily whenever he pleased. After an hour, all the food was done and ready, allowing us to eat Christmas dinner together and converse with each other. Twilight and Yuri talked about business together (Yuri sending him his infamous glares) while Yor and I talked with Anya about her cartoons and how school was for her.

We finally got to presents and watched Anya open her gifts, each one she unwrapped having a big smile on her face and her voice getting to loud enough volumes to potentially disturb other residents.

Yuri and I gave Twilight his gifts. He seemed appreciative of them, mentioning how he'd put them to good use. Twilight gave me a book and Yuri an expensive bottle of wine (to repay him for the expensive wine Yuri bought the first time we came over).

I gave Yor the set of earrings I picked out, a set of golden suns, and showed her the golden moons I bought and told her the symbolism of us matching and being sisters now. It was enough to make her cry and earn one of her death hugs. I'm almost 99% positive that she would've broken my rib if Twilight didn't calmly tell her to not squeeze so hard. Yuri also gave her the apple whistle candy along with some other gifts he bought her. In return, she gave me a fruity perfume and Yuri a comfortable sweater.

Anya was happy about all of her toys and candies, excited and hyper about it all. It was like it was her first time celebrating Christmas. Even Bond was happy, showing his joy by jumping up and down with Anya and barking (borfing). Bond seems like a surprisingly emotionally intelligent dog, though I supposed that's probably expecting considering it's Twilight (and because Twilight got him from the Project Apple situation).

We all stayed and talked more before it was time for Yuri and I to go home, considering how late it was getting. Yuri and I walked back home, getting to our apartment before I gave him his gift.

"I got you something. I made it myself." I spoke, reaching into my purse and handing him a small wrapped up box.

Yuri opened it, revealing a small square card, made out of pure silver (just like our wedding rings) and a small poem on the card

Your eyes shine like the twinkle of mars, How I wish to claim and explore every part of you as if you were a new constellation. Your lips are like warm pillows, How I wish to forever rest my own against yours. Your voice could never compare to the delicate silk of Asia, the waves of the Pacific, or the luminous of the Aurora Borealis. How you make me lose my voice to utter sweet delicacies in your ears, so let me express it to you in another way: I love you, Yuri Briar... - Love, (Y/N) Briar

"I just found a stupid poem for you..." I muttered, suddenly feeling a little flustered for how stupid and cheesy the writing sounds now.

"You liar." He smirked, a noticeable fondness in his eyes. "Thank you. You said you made it yourself?"

"Yeah." I nodded. "It took some time, but I made it from scratch. I welded the silver together and welded the words... Of course words from a poem in a book." I coughed the last part out.

"You don't gotta be shy~" He teased.

"Whatever..." I chuckled. "But I figured I'd get you something you can always have with you. You can put it in your wallet or pocket or something."

"Thank you. Really." Yuri smiled, grabbing his wallet and placing it inside gently. "You really beat me this year in presents." He chuckled. "I kept tryna think for a while what I should get you, you're surprisingly difficult to shop for even though you're so expressive."

"I'm a little eccentric." I smirked.

"That's an understatement." He smiled. "But, here."

He walked to our room and I heard him rummaging through drawers, before walking out with a large heart-shaped chocolate box, candies I enjoy, some books he noticed I've been eyeing over the months, and some fake flowers.

"it's definitely not anything compared to what you got me." He spoke.

"Nonsense." I smiled. "I love all of it. I really do."

"Yeah, I knew how much you liked sweets and books." He reasoned. "And I figured it must be a bit annoying replacing the flower bouquets whenever they die, so I decided to get some fake flowers, to make it easier to tend to, and to show permanency in our relationship since we're married."

"How romantic~" I teased. "Thank you, Hon."

"Merry Christmas, darling." He smiled.

"Merry Christmas, love." I hummed, kissing his cheek.

"You know, you didn't have to get me anything. You're the best gift for me, (Y/N)!" He spoke, a light blush dusting his face.

"Yuri please, never say such sappy words again." I sighed.

I apologize sincerely for the huge delay! I had a hard time trying to figure out what I want, and I got busy indulging myself in reading about German foods and such, and I had little time to write due to work so the only time I had to write was when I was supposed to be sleeping or relaxing, but I finally got this done! Better late than never!

I honestly do feel a little silly writing that poem since it's my first time ever writing poetry/a love note, so I do hope it wasn't too bad or cringy!

Want more Yuri content? Check out the Yuri Briar x reader masterlist!

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popponn · 1 year ago

Text

things about isagi yoichi

i'm keeping a list about isagi for reasons (mostly personal amusement) (please do feel free to add or correct them). contains possible spoiler for manga up to chapter 230 so far and light novel. will get longer, probably, as time goes on. (update, it gets longer and up to uber match ending as of today.)

considerate. almost like a people pleaser. actual people pleaser at first.

pragmatic. thinks very calmly, even when angry it seems, but his words still sometimes get too much.

think things through, sometimes too much.

is confident, but not unaware of his own weaknesses

start pretty insecure.

seems to be sheepish - happy when someone praise / support / pay a large attention to him (pretty humble) (interview, that one kid in station, his family)

how he acts depends on who he is interacting with

switch to a more polite speech pattern whenever nervous (pretty obvious in japanese text, like in the interview scene after bm vs mc).

seems to be less competent on other things other than soccer

looking at his favorite manga / song / shows (most are medias with children as the main audience in mind), either really loves his childhood or doesn’t pay attention to many things after soccer. seems like the latter.

a really healthy family dynamics. his parents are very supportive of his dream.

loves katsu curry.

is a pretty 'normal' high school guy it seems. tissues near the bed, thigh fetish, read manga. speaks normally.

i really don't get why he has a habit of making sure his ahoges stand up in v before a match but god thats cute.

can be really rude and impatient sometimes

is good with people, but seems to enjoy alone time too. seems to be an introvert.

at least on screen, never really talk about how it was in ichinan with the blue lock guys. either it didn't bother him that much consciously or is the type of person who gets along with everyone but no one really knows the background of in details. (put it simply might be more introverted than he appears to be, especially considering how he usually is with people)

seems to be uncomfortable with new people in his personal space (early bachira + kaiser)

while doesn’t ‘like’ rude people, seems to grow ‘used’ to them and even openly admire them (barou + rin)

does not seems to easily prejudice / be judgmental to someone. is really patient (respect to barou, that one chapter with tada from ichinan, still praises kaiser despite the antagonism between them)

his fashion sense is pretty... this is very subjective as i don't have the word for it yet, but yeah, is either not good or pretty old fashioned. (in anime official arts)

when it comes to soccer often looks angrier expression wise

really egoistic. unsurprisingly.

sometimes is pretty self centered in the way that “this is my fault” sometimes, rather than focusing on someone else. but most of the time his self centeredness comes out as “i want this and i will get this”.

on some moments also seems to focus more on what he is not satisfied with rather than what he is satisfied with. might be caused by the storytelling beats, but if taken into consideration how he always wants to improve, it's not unsurprising.

seems to be more goal / result oriented, but is not dismissive towards the process.

whenever he sees someone better than him or something seems to be ‘impossible’ for him, most of the time his responds are ‘i have to work harder for it’. sometimes there are moments of insecurity, but they are fleeting and always went back to ‘i will overcome this / him’ as a respond.

very!!!! competitive. but it’s blue lock.

both in and outside soccer, seems to be very independent

seems to be more analytical by nature rather than intuitive, especially in learning style. complete opposite of nagi.

often starts noticing things from little things and details first before going and getting the bigger picture. detail oriented person? at least in soccer.

yeah soccer nerd.

if the 0 valentine choco, his reaction to seeing live two women getting played in karaoke, and how he didn't immediately went to girls in bowling alley—yeah. definitely 0 experience with girls.

is not wishy washy. knows what he wants and is not the type to change his preference because of his surroundings. did just act as if his preference is different / just doesn't say a thing or walk away when it isn't, back in ichinan these habits are obvious. in blue lock, he doesn't actively try to make other people uncomfortable and even still accommodate some out of the field, but clearly has become more outspoken in his preference or for his comfort. boy really grew more confident (and i love him for it).

he asks santa for ps4 and other than yeah normal highschool boy behavior idk how to dissect or overanalyze this yet give me a sec or a year.

like treats!!!! seems to be partial to sweets, but he also enjoys sour candies according to egoist bible.

doesn't like being ignored. and it kinda shows.

his beef with kaiser is hilarious—but it make sense because kaiser obviously bring it up even out of field (that locker room scene after yukimiya isagi argument), taunts isagi every chance he got (vs barcha, vs mc), and whatever happened in the match. isagi better than some bluelockers and me fr frfr considering he still did not try to punch kaiser's mug.

which bring the point doesn't seems to enjoy fistfight. either shitty at it or just chose not too. but looking at his trend of being shitty at things that are not soccer and his canonically low stats especially before blue lock. yeah might be shit at fistfight (with also a bit of the latter because how do one not try to sock kaiser in the face after *gestures wildly* all that. footnote, i admit the bias). (karaoke, shidou vs rin duking it out pt.1—my guy was dying and he wasn't the one duking it out)

tidy, but not overly tidy to barou level. but realistically comparing it to stereotypes of high school boys? real tidy. (could be seen in blue lock exhib's display of his u20 arc locker and team white bedroom)

wants lil sis or big sis because of my neighbor totoro. idk how to dissect this either but—yeah not a rare thing for an only kid to say, actually.

seems to be more of a street smart kinda guy.

his tenacity in befriending or at least interacting with rin is admirable. shipping lense or not it really is.

he gets along with almost everyone. shipping lenses or not, also amazing especially for an introvert.

he says the wildest shit on field like uh yeah things he said with yukimiya was said to be cencored a little because in jp someone said he was calling yukimiya something else i don't know to say in english.

but is actually not an absolute asshole in field, saw yukimiya broke down and bro actually took a second to pay attention and moved on. until he got provoked, that is.

actually rarely become the one who approach other people first (kira, bachira).

can really got extreme when in high tension (shoving chigiri off, that 100℅ kill you @ kaiser).

turns out he talks about the thigh stuff bashfully. (it's cute.) but i still wonder why he likes lobster. like i feel like something is there. why is his taste in everything that is not soccer makes me wonder what the fuck is up with him. favorite song? cm jingle. fashion sense? honestly casual, but his sense in pattern and color is genuinely so bad im hurting. this point is so full of personal bias feel free to skip it.

seems to be pretty oblivious to things about not-soccer. especially his surroundings. not to the dense point but seems like it stems more from his focus at soccer. but this trait seems to go hand in hand with his self centered tendencies.

(this is bordering to hc, but) it seems like while is indeed obsessed with soccer, more than "oh he is only good at soccer", is more of a "if he wants it he will find a way to get it". but taking in account how his personality used to be in ichinan / pre blue lock, it's unsurprising that he doesn't want that mamy things. even in soccer that he is passionate about, he didn't back then. there is also the fact that he seems to have tendency to hyperfocus into something (i.e.: while still taking into account of others in soccer, think more of them as 'factors' than 'people'), so it may seems like the reason he got or became good at something is like "oh isagi is lucky / specialized in that", but it seems hard work and dedication really does put a big role into it, unsurprisingly. could reach that level in soccer because he is dedicated into it, tldr.

this part also became quite visible if taking into account he wants to play specifically as a striker. he is focused in this very specific thing he wants, that's why he managed to get it / improve in it.

if i did not miscount, he directly has a conversation with ego twice. and in both he is extremely impolite, calling ego names in one (u20 arc). while the other happened after he lost against rin in 4v4, and seems like he is still not happy with the loss. ans it shows. he is pretty rude when ego talk about luck which he himself noted was a big factor there. (man hold grudge.)

so yeah, seems like rather than "possessed in field" it could also be "possessed in everything related to soccer", though fudther research is to be conducted.

is pretty introverted even in blue lock. while sometimes he shares his insight to other people about his play, sometimes he also did not do this (recently you can see this the most in his interactions with ness). but yeah, this is the thing he shares about the most, something related to playmaking and soccer. but other than that nothing—at least on screen.

his pretty peaceful and uneventful background could be factored into, however ichinan highschool is pretty much his tragic backstort and not a peep about that to even bachira it seems. a possibility is that he is hyperfocused towards soccer. not to say his self centered part that is more of "what can i change about myself for this situation" and "i can't change others' way of thinking".

however seeing how that one meeting tada goes (post u20 break) and he said nothing to correct tada, even though he secretly disagrees—then also his parents who seems pretty oblivious to his soccer performance and how he casually acted about his lost against kira despite crying and screaming on public just before that—yeah, seems like a pretty private person. it's not that he is oblivious or do it out of malice, but mostly seems like he just doesn't comment about it and more of the listening type. and even when someone close ask the right question it seems like he doesn't try to show much expression or how he actually feels.

personal bias but yeah this is no longer """being polite""", this is actually being private to a very concerning degree. like the time he opened up about his worry, and still pretty related with soccer, that is completely visibly vulnerable seems like it was with nagi after 3v3 with rin (and see how that ended up. tho this make the fact that he and nagi became pretty close afterwards in such a short time a bit unsurprising. this two indeed kinda have quite a lot bonding moments outside and inside the field, shipping lens or not). like no wonder this guy snaps in soccer field, it's pent emotions fr.

but if how he is after u20 any indication, it seems like he really is very reserved outside of field that it kind of resembles how he was before blue lock. (who knows after nel arc (still bm vs uber rn when i write this, tho the match seems like ending), because boy seems grumpier there. not blaming him tho, it's battle royale inside that team.)

doing a little skimming but it seems like when talking about something he really never put focus on his feelings. it's either what's going on, others' feelings, or an opinion of his but if there are any feelings most of them stays in monologue and thoughts only.

adding to that nagi note, personally found it funny that he nearly get into same team with nagi TWICE (pre u20 team selection, nel choice where he is conflicted between german or england) but he never followed thru with it. this probably has more to do with nagi's motif & such rather than his, which this post wasn't here for sry nagi, and the fact that both that they are protagonists in the main and spinoff. but yeah, personally? it's funny it happened twice. especially factoring the fact they are close enough to have each other's number and isagi admits he has a nice chemical reaction with nagi.

i genuinely wonder how he interacts with kaiser outside of field. like. dude. i know it's funny.

might also add now that it seems the four people he is closest with is bachira and chigiri. was, with kunigami too but yeah. bachira especially, with the two keep being called two side of a coin/a soul. again, shipping lens or not, they are pretty close and isagi really seems to have come to a point where he is okay with bachira's habits no matter how odd. (personal bias, really sweet considering bachira has no friends before this and isagi while is friend with tada WE KNOW HOW IT ALL TURNS OUT). with chigiri, seems like the type of friends who look out for each other (isagi once shown checking his knee and messaging him, while chigiri is the first one jumping into action when shidou nearly kicked him). then you also add that chigiri only ever, on screen at least, opened up about his past to isagi and honestly yeah. shipping lens or not, these two definitely the looking after each other dynamic. kunigami come back, or at least interact with isagi more pls.

WHICH ALSO, seems like isagi is the only one reo kind of opened up to with his insecurities after the 2nd selection—kunigami and chigiri seems to get it too, but at least it was never shown on screen that he opened up the more vulnerable side of his anger at nagi and isagi to them. these two has a pretty good relationship it seems after that screening room scene. (might revise or at to this when epi nagi reach this part)

but this seems unsurprising in some ways because isagi really seems like the listening type. some people said these type of people is good when it comes to getting people opening up. also seems like isagi really never run his mouth so good choice actually. (look at him even he doesnt open up his own emotion how could he do that with other people's emotion. what is this a sign of pent emotion or just a sign of actual limited emotional intelligence when it came to processing them? who knows. blue lock's highly stressful and intense environment is also a factor here but hey, look at how isagi was in ichinan. might be old habits)

he is scarily cold and detached to his bonds when it came to soccer, it seems? like, he is still capable of sympathy even during the heat of the moment, unless you make him angry (both cases: yukki). but for the sake of his play his priority really is on "this is the play that i want" rather than friendships and stuff. on one side, professionality. on the other, yeah egoist.

outside of field doesn't seem to go out of his way to dig up about someone's backstory in "asking and digging and wanting to talk about feelings with them", but will listen if told. (i.e. chigiri acl convo, reo opening up, casually talking about soccer again after noa ego relationship bomb drop, etc.) seems to be more as 'minding his own business and being not nosy', which is kind of in line with his politeness.

then you bring soccer and his ideal play and it gets really cold. he really think of soccer as 'cruel' and it kind of shows with how little he thinks of outside-of-field-relation during a game. (really shows if you compare how most characters personal story, rin and reo for example, has a huge impact on their play) his brain really has an on and off switch with the niceness.

at some point in blue lock, his closest circle is bachira, chigiri, kunigami (could be canon or could be due to the fact these four are kind of the quadruplet of bllk). he is pretty much the guy most of everyone knows and has at least spoken with once after u20 tho.

but other than those 4, it seems that the one he have more highlighted rivalry are niko, barou, rin, and nagi, with yukimiya coming in later in bm. it's funny how isagi seems pretty attached to them in a pretty friendly manner in some ways. barou and rin is just on another level of "i will kill you" getting answered with "sure, okay, geez" (and it's hilarious. with barou, isagi shared meals, was a roommate, and went bowling together once. with rin, he did yoga, laughed at his death threat, and was pissed because rin was impolite. i can go on but moving on). nagi and isagi canonically get along pretty well out of screen. isagi is roommate with yukimiya—i didn't except this combo back then but i really want to know their interactions in that room, especially during and after their conflict.

then there is hiyori, kurona, and nanase's case whose relationship with him is more on the 'supporting side'. with reo, it seems to also fall into the rivalry category—but this guy's relationship with isagi is kind of more about reo-nagi relationship than with isagi himself. with aiku, it's rivalry between defender and attacker (resembles niko the most but the things these two said to each other is way wilder). then there is kaiser—i will wait til nel arc is done.

there are crumbs with some other charas like sae—but these two didn't interact (yet?) in canon. with noa, it's admiration and respect, to put it simply, but it seems it's leaning more into actual mentorship that is more casual compared to how most of bm is with noa (imo, take this part with a grain of salt). with ego, it's...surprisingly complicated on a meta level from my perspective at least.

isagi clearly agrees and thrives with ego's philosophy, but other than taking ego's words/guidance isagi was rude to him. then there is stuff like some part of their design being similar to each other (v hair, eyes on some panels tho this also happens with other charas, beta isagi sketch) and how during nel ego - isagi similarities get commented by noa and snuffy (tho on snuffy case is more of barou - isagi is like ego - noa, who is who tho we don't know for sure). it feels like there is more on these two for the future.

with his family, it's just sweet. his family is proud and supportive of him. and seeing how isagi is pretty independent as in his attachment style is very secure in blue lock, even with how ichinan basically turned him into a people pleaser, yeah definitely and canonically a good family there. he greets them every morning as part of his morning routine, and he is the only character who mention this in said trivia.

enjoys his alone time, based on his trivia. the introvert part is loud and clear.

he doesn't really get jealous easily. like rather than envy, it's more of frustration directed towards himself or straight up being pissed because said someone played a factor in why he couldn't make a goal. but most of the time, when he sees someone's strength, it came out more as an admiration and "i should do more and stand out more too!!!" rather than comparing himself and feels negativity. this especially never happen to his perception towards his capabilities. the closest thing we ever get to him feeling envy is perhaps the parts where he goes "i don't have weapon like them" when talking about chigiri's speed, kaiser impact, and others' specialities. but even then it never really lingers.

and from that probably also shows that isagi is really good at looking someone's strength or specialities. but this seems to also happen in looking at weaknesses and chances. he really does tries to take into account tendencies, skills, blind spots, etc. honestly thinking about this make sense why he immediately collapsed after vs mc, the information loading must be insane. but all in all, the main point is that he is pretty good at reviewing and observing stuffs indeed.

high achiever with an amazing durability. as said word by word by kaiser himself, this guy look at something way more amazing than himself and keep taking it as a challenge. aka his mental strength is insane—or his competitiveness is just that crazy. no wonder he thrives in blue lock where so many people want to him eat alive.

after thinking for a bit and connecting it with the 'not teaming with nagi during the u20 tryouts', it seems like also the guy who avoids his comfort zone, in area of skills and plays in this case. he seems to actively challenge himself.

seriously the type of guy who do and chase what he wants. egoist indeed.

but thinking about that, it also speaks of his adaptability and flexibility. while the part that definitely carries more tension, seriousness, and definitely didn't take shit came out so much in soccer, the way he interacts with those who are friendly with him is so different with those who are antagonistic with him. though so far, with the exception of kaiser it seems, he at some point ended up in a pretty good relationship with some of those—rin and barou are most telling. the antagonism is back on when they are in seperate team tho, but hey this is blue lock.

his moment of satisfaction is really fast—as in he like cheers for a bit, most of the time, then focus on the next challenge. this could be caused by: 1) blue lock highly competitive and rapidly changing environment; 2) it's just how he is build.

#blue lock #bllk isagi #isagi yoichi #isagi #bllk #bluelock #this is like character study #if character study is literally studying a character who lives rent free in your head for three months and counting #so still #character study #i guess #ehe 👍#for my own sake im putting this tag #im just rambling at this point but hey

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bsd-fan · 11 months ago

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Soukoku and the mafia

After a million years, I’m finally back with an analysis. I’ve already kind of analyzed Dazai and Chuuya as individual characters but I purposefully left behind something that was fundamental for both of their characterizations and that played a big role in molding their actual personalities. Yes, I’m talking about the environment they grew up in: The mafia.

Because the length and the complexity of the topic, I decided to make an entire post just about this. Obviously there will be spoilers of the anime, manga and light novels so be aware of that.

*Also a friendly reminder that english is not my native language, so I apologize if there’s any grammar or ortographic mistake or if something is worded in a weird way, I just hope is not bad enough that you can’t make sense of it at all. This is also extremely self indulgent and extremely long.

I’m gonna start by establishing the main premise of this analysis and the idea I will be defending in the next parragraphs:

The mafia is literally the worst place for skk to be in (and yes, I’m talking about BOTH of them)

Now this is a bold sentence because the immediate response would probably be something among the lines of “well duh, the mafia is a horrible place for everyone” and yes but also no. The mafia affects soukoku in a special way that is vastly different to how it affects the other characters in the mafia.

I’ve found that the mafia is one of the most misunderstood points in the series (Cycle of abuse, I’m looking at you) so I’m gonna talk about it. Back in chuuya’ analysis, I talked about how he shouldn’t be in the mafia. I wasn’t talking about this in terms of “Chuuya is majorly speaking a good person” and “The mafia is a morally bad place”, that’s pure bullshit and certainly not what I was referring to.

When the fandom talks about the mafia there are two major points of view. Either they saw it as hell incarnate or they see it as the “bad” protectors of the city, kind of a twisted family. And while both of this opinions are not /completely/ wrong, they’re also NOT right. Once again, the problem is that the fandom /still/ insists on assigning a moral category to something that is far more complicated than that. Yes, it’s the mafia, it’s literally a place of crime, it’s /obvious/ they’re gonna do morally bad things but they are also an important part in the tripartite framework and a major reason of why the city is still standing, this are not mutually exclusive. And that’s because the mafia is not a morally oriented organization.

The next biggest mistake when it comes to this topic is thinking of Mori and the Mafia as synonyms. People loves to blame Mori for every single thing that happens, there is always an entire section of comments that always claim “Normalize blaming Mori for everything” and that’s just /plainly/ wrong. I need you to understand that the mafia existed before Mori and will exist after Mori and it still will require of a leader that have certain type of characteristics. The reason Mori is the perfect leader for this organization is because he perfectly represents the mafia ideology NOT the opposite. Is Mori who adapts himself to the mafia, not the mafia adapting to him. Obviously he is in charge and he gets to influence and dictate the actions of the organization, the same way the old boss did (and he made a shit hole out of it) but the mafia as it core exists as a concept that can not be altered not matter who is in charge of it. And that’s what we have to understand.

Let’s start by defining it:

“An economic body that uses violence as it’s currency” -Mori

And that’s it, that’s the first and most important thing you gotta understand about the mafia. It’s not about bad people doing bad things for the sake of it. It’s not about morally grey people saving the city because of the good in their hearts. The mafia as it core is about money, is about benefits, is about gaining the most. It’s an economic body.

They will kill, kidnap and torture? Yes but they won’t do it because they’re bad, they will do it only if there’s something to gain out of it. They save the city and stop the other criminal groups? Yes, but it’s not because they are secretly good people. It’s to maintain the monopoly of the crime in the city and protect their territory where they have all the money and where they do their negotiations. There /are/ people in the mafia who genuinely care about the city like Mori, Chuuya, Tachihara or Hirotsu, I don’t doubt there are other people as well who cares about it but those are personal motivations that have absolutely nothing to do with the mafia as an institution. Because the mafia as it’s own entity only cares about the gains and losses.

So when we talk about the main difference between the Mafia and the ADA is not about morality. Both organizations are full of morally grey people, both of this organizations are ready to do criminal activities if required. The main difference is the objectives behind them. The ADA is a organization of people for people.

“There is no agency more valuable than human life”- fukuzawa about the ADA, first light novel

The ADA is about doing their best to help people, is about prioritizing human life above everything else. And when they do criminal acts? It’s because it was the only way to preserve as many lives as possible.

The mafia on the other hand is about gaining money and resources and it’s about securing the survival of it as as Institution doing whatever is necessary to achieve it.

“These magical stones always led to violence and bloodshed, and the only thing that could stop this violence and maintain a stable system was even more violence”— Chuuya, stormbringer.

In the last chapters we realize that even though the ADA as an organization technically doesn’t exist anymore (because they were seen as a terrorist group) they still can perfectly exist as long as the members are alive. They can make another organization but they can’t just replace one of their members, that would be a critical hit for them. That’s abysmally different to how the mafia conduces itself. It doesn’t matter how many people die, they can be easily replaced but if the mafia as an institution falls? Then they lose everything. So this means, that the ADA will sacrifice the organization as many times as necessary if by doing it, they can protect it’s members meanwhile the mafia will sacrifice as many people as necessary if by doing it they assure the survival of the mafia as an institution. And this has been shown again and again and again. It’s because of this main objective that the mafia by definition and independently of Mori, needs to be: Extremely Rational, utilitarian and deeply Machiavellian because if not, then it wouldn’t be able to survive. The mafia as an institution requires someone who will put the needs of the organization over personal feelings and even over the members of the institution if that’s the best option..

And that’s why Mori is the perfect leader of the organization, because he is the textbook ideal of what a Mafia boss should be. Mori is not known for being the cruelest or the evilest. He is known for being the most logical, not matter what. For always being cold and rational.

“Dazai, Do you know why I’m the boss? (…) I don’t posess an incredible skill like you or chuuya. Instead, however, I am a little better at something than the two of you. I can always predict exactly how many men I need to send into battle”- Mori, stormbringer.

To illustrate this better let’s talk about the death of the old boss and Odasaku.

First thing to understand is that people is not stupid, they always /knew/ that Mori killed the old boss. For fuck’s sake even the sheep who were a group of literal /kids/ that weren’t even part of the mafia knew that there was no way that the old boss died of naturally causes and casually left the mafia to Mori who coincidentally happened to be his doctor. They all knew but they are collectively playing pretend. Why? Because they recognize that Mori is the best option, because they know that Mori won’t sacrifice them without reason, he won’t ask them to do useless things. Every single action that Mori takes is for the benefit of the organization, is logical and can be defended using rational arguments and when he decides to sacrifice someone there’s also a reason behind it. And that’s the best option possible for a place like the Mafia. The mafiosos chose him because of it, but make no mistakes, if the time comes where Mori is more a liability than an asset then someone will most likely kill him and take his place exactly the way he did. That’s the way of the mafia. Just like Mori says, even in the top, everyone’s is a slave of the organization including himself.

Odasaku’s death was carefully planned and I’m not denying that there were personal reasons there, I’m not denying that part of it was to specifically aim to Dazai, being as part of training him to become the next boss of out of fear of Dazai killing him, Mori did this move knowing that Dazai was gonna be affected by it. But as much as all of you would hate to listen to it, it was also the most logical course of action. Just stop to think about it. You have this incredibly powerful asset, someone who is extremely competent, someone who is insanely strong but you can’t use him because he refuses to do any important task, he refuses to kill. He is basically wasted talent. But then there’s an opportunity to gain something extremely valuable (the ability’s permission) and you just have to eliminate one powerful group of people and hey, your liability happens to be the /perfect/ person for the job, so what do you do? What Mori did may be horrible but also was a genius move. He destroyed an entire organization while sacrificing one single person who was useless to him anyway. He gained something that was vital for the organization with basically no losses. Yes, he sacrificed the children and that’s fucking sick and horrible but they weren’t his responsibility, the organization was. The kids weren’t part of the organization, sacrificing them doesn’t translate to any significant losses to the mafia. That’s why Dazai is so frustrated by the end, because he lost his best friend, he is suffering but he can’t deny that Mori was logical about it, he can’t deny that that was rational. Even in beast there’s this whole part explaining how difficult it was to defeat mimic without oda, do you know what does that mean? Dazai probably sacrificed a large number of people to do it and even if he didn’t why would you as the Leander of the organization would take the most difficult path when there’s other that is far easier and cheaper? And just like that, every single one of Mori’s actions can be explained with a logical process behind it.

I feel like the biggest argument to understand that even though Mori represents the Mafia ideals, the mafia is still an independent organization of Mori is Beast. He is not the mafia boss in beast but the mafia basically remains exactly the same organization, akutagawa is not suffering but Atsushi is. People are suffering exactly the same, the only different thing is /who/are the ones suffering. Sure, someone can argument that Dazai was not trying to be the best leader, just to save Odasaku but the whole point is that generally speaking he had to make enough of a decent job to maintain the order in the city. Under Dazai’s command the mafia was more powerful than they were with Mori in charge. And it’s horrible, but that’s the only way to rule it. Otherwise the whole organization would fall apart. So to summarize the horrible environment of the mafia is NOT because of mori. We already saw the mafia in charge of the old boss, of Mori and of Dazai and the environment is kind of the same with slightly worse or better differences and that’s because again there are parts of the mafia that can’t be altered independently of who is in charge.

“A leader is simultaneously at the top of the organization and still a slave to it as a whole. You need to be willing to get your hands dirty to keep the organization afloat and thriving. A leader develops their subordinates and places them wherever they best fit and disposed of them if necessary. I will gladly perform the most heinous acts for the sake of this organization. That’s what it means to be a leader”- Mori, fifteen

Mori is far from perfect, he is horrible and sick and also have lots of personal interests, he also uses the organization to a certain degree to achieve them. But this is not fake. He will put the organization over everything else. That’s what it means to be the boss of the mafia.

So now that we got that out of the way and we learn to differentiate Mori from the mafia and we now understand that the mafia is not a moral organization but an economic body, we can start explaining why the mafia is such a terrible place for Dazai and Chuuya especifically. Let’s start with Dazai. We already discussed it but for the mafia to accomplish it’s main objective it needs to have certain characteristics.

Rational

Utilitarian

Machiavellian

Do this words remind you of someone?

“Your blood is mafia black”

Have you ever wondered why even though chuuya is the one with the greatest body count, Dazai is the one that always seems to be like the worse of them? Why Dazai is the first one to come to mind when they talk about the next mafia boss?

It’s because just like Mori he perfectly embodies the ideals of the mafia as an institution. He is brilliant, kind of apathetic, cold, rational, manipulative and he is naturally an utilitarian (philosophy that believes that the best action is the one that produces happiness to the most people) and Machiavellian (ideology that puts one’s goals over everything else, discarding the moral consequences and the ethics qualifications) this can be summarized to one simply sentence: Dazai is the type of person who is result oriented, it doesn’t matter the means, just the final result and that’s exactly the kind of ideology that the mafia needs to exist. And that’s just part of his natural personality.

So why the mafia is such a bad place for him if it seems like it’s the most natural place for him to be?

If this is the first thing that came to your mind:

Then you’re wrong and I’m here to spit in this idea of cycle of abuse.

Okay so first of all, people refer to “cycle of abuse” to the wrong thing. You’re actually referring to intergenerational abuse and even more than that you are all thinking about the /individualized/ abuse of one person to other than then replicates the same thing in someone else. Thing is, if we make this cycle we will arrive to Mori and I just wrote half a bible of why this is factually incorrect, so don’t make me say it again. Then, there’s the second biggest issue here, this is /incredibly/ reductionist. There /are/ parallelisms in this relationships, yes. But I need you to understand that even though they were indeed abused to a certain degree, they are all part of the mafia which is an abusive place to begin with and by definition. There was no way for them to not suffer this and they weren’t the only ones, everyone in the mafia was abused one way or another and it came from different places not just one specific person . Now let me start with the thing that bugs me the most of this cycle.

It obligates me to defend Mori

See, I can perfectly understand Dazai and Akutagawa being here because even though Aku was manipulated and used for more people in the mafia than just Dazai is a fact that he was the main abuser. It’s true that is was a target abuse and that was repetitive and degrading every single time. Akutagawa is now basically a glorified Pavlovian experiment thanks to Dazai. Yes, Dazai cares for him, yes Dazai actually was trying to teach him and to make him stronger. The intention here is secondary, akutagawa still ended up deeply traumatized and with a pathological need of recognition to survive.

Now akutagawa and kyouka? This one is more questionable because we know that Kouyou and Akutagawa had kind of a twisted version of shared custody when it came to her. So kyouka was abused for more than one person and not necessarily in an intergenerational abuse so the cycle is no longer a cycle right? But okay let’s go with it. We have actual canon proof that akutagawa abused her replicating Dazai’s methods with him so it can still qualify.

But Dazai and Mori? WHERE?

In all the story there’s no proof that Dazai was abused in this way by Mori.

It simply doesn’t exist, it’s just a headcanon that became so popular that everyone started to believe it. Yes, Mori exposed Dazai to a murder when he was fourteen and that’s a form of abuse, true. But have you noticed that most of the mafiosos got into the mafia when they were teenagers or even literal kids (Q was six, gin was also younger than Dazai) they were ALL exposed to this form of abuse. This doesn’t make it okay, of course but it’s not the kind of individualized abuse that you all love to talk about. “He manipulated him” true, he also manipulated oda, Ango, Chuuya, Q, etc. Again it certainly wasn’t personal or out of place for a mafia boss. And again IT’S NOT A CYCLE. We also have absolutely no evidence of Mori being physically or sexually abusive towards Dazai. He psychologically abused of him? Yes but once again there’s no evidence of it being worse than it was with other people. It’s plausible of course, because Dazai worked directly under him but for the most part it doesn’t seem like he was specifically horrible towards Dazai. You want to talk about Mori being horrible with someone? At least choose the right person because yosano is right there. Dazai had most of this personality traits before meeting Mori, so it’s not like Dazai was a perfectly sane and happy kid that would’ve been normal of he was picked up by a good person, he was not ranpo or yosano. Let’s also add that Dazai seemed to be incredibly desensitized to violence even at fourteen. We can’t blame Mori for his character traits but we can certainly blame him because he made them worse.

So if not for this, then why Dazai shouldn’t be in the mafia? Is not for the abuse, is not for the moral implications, then why?

Easy, the real reason it’s because of Dazai’s core as character. Dazai doesn’t care for the mafia, he doesn’t care for power and even though he naturally seeks the benefits out of every situation that also is not his core as a character. His core is and always be: Humanity. That’s what Dazai is looking for, that’s his nucleus as a character and that’s the reason the mafia is the worst place Dazai can be in, regardless of his abilities.

Dazai gets into the mafia trying to find a reason to live, trying to understand humanity so that would make him close to his own and it really seemed like the perfect plan, it was logical. The mafia certainly is a place where death is part of life, emotions are raw and most often than not genuine. Then why It didn’t work? Why his mental stake kept deteriorating more and more? Because it took him farther away from his humanity. I’ve said it before but the reason Dazai felt inhuman is because of a permanent sense of alienation and isolation. Dazai already has certain characteristics that make it harder for him to establish emotional bonds with people. His brain also moves faster than everyone’s else’s, so for him is so /easy/ to stop looking people as individuals and look at them as pieces to use and discard. The mafia is the worst place for him to be because it enhance this characteristics, the mafia impulses him to use them because that makes him the best asset but that also makes him incredibly miserable because it worsens the alienation thus increasing the deshumanization. Also the mafia makes him intellectualize as a coping mechanism which worsens his self awareness that to begin with is pretty poor. That’s not all, because of the nature of the mafia Dazai who already has trust issues ends up even worse so it isolates him even more. The only moments he seems to be closer to his humanity is with people like chuuya or Oda, and the hilarious thing about it is that they both are basically the opposite of what the mafia represents. More than that, Chuuya actually obligates him to go back to earth and start acting less as a god and more as a human being.

Which also explains why the ADA is better for Dazai than the mafia. Is not because of morality, is because is an organization that revolves around people so it obligates him to interact and create relationships with people, and even if they’re not 100% honest. It still decrease his alienation and isolation and being him closer to his humanity. That’s the reason the ADA is the best place for him.

Similarly but in a completely different way there’s chuuya, except that he is a thousand times more tragic than Dazai and every time I stop to think about him I want to sob, scream, throw up.

Dazai has the characteristics to be the perfect mafioso but his nucleus make it impossible for him to be one. Chuuya doesn’t have the characteristics to be a mafioso and also has the same nucleus as Dazai.

So the premise is: The mafia and chuuya are irreconciliable ideas and it’s a miracle that it’s still working.

We already went through everything that the mafia represents, we already know that by /definition/ the mafia is a place where you have to deshumanize other people and yourself in order to survive. It’s not a surprise that is the WORSE place in the world for the two people whose whole characterizations revolves around humanity.

But in chuuya’s case, his whole personality and ideological system directly clash with the mafia. Is fucking tragic. Let me remind you that chuuya gain his whole sense of humanity and identity out of the relationships he makes with people. Chuuya /cares/ for people, that’s just the kind of person he is. You CAN’T ask him to start viewing this people that are /everything/ to him just like chess pieces that can be sacrificed at any moment. That would be the equivalent of spitting in his sense of humanity, to take away his reason to live and his identity. That would completely break him. So chuuya keeps making bonds with people and suffering Every. Single. Loss. Because the mafia is a place of sacrifice and he can’t stop it not matter how hard he tries. And that it’s also devastating in a whole new way.

“His eyes were tainted with Darkness just like everyone in the mafia. It was a murky darkness-one that viewed human lives as mere numbers”- about Arthur, fifteen

This is the mafia, this is the mindset needed to be there. This is also precisely the opposite of everything that chuuya is. Chuuya survives because he can’t view human as numbers. People are the most precious thing in the world for him.

This is chuuya Nakahara:

You value your friendships and make decisions accordingly. I suppose you could call this human nature- Adam, stormbringer

Chuuya is in a place where people die and no one cares, because they were simply numbers, because they don’t exist as individuals not really.

“Countless people died, but the incident hardly remained in anyone’s memory”- stormbringer

The flags died and no one aside from him cared, after that he made new friends that were also killed in the same fucking year and once again nobody stopped, just him. The mafia just replaced them and acted like it was nothing. And meanwhile:

“-Chuuya you smell like incense. Did you go visiting those graves again?- shirase about chuuya, stormbringer

Chuuya keeps visiting those graves because even when no one remembers them, he does, because they were his friends, they were individuals. Hell, leave alone his friends, Chuuya fucking goes to talk to Arthur’s grave. That’s the type of person he is

Chuuya is emotional, he is straightforward, he is honest, he /cares/. Chuuya’s so opposite to the mafia ideals that it would be funny if it didn’t make me want to eat glass. In order to be in this organization he has to go against his personality, against his values and against his moral code. Do you have an idea of how tiring that is? Of how much that affects him? Even if he refuses to notice? So chuuya solved his conflict, he found his humanity but he did it in a place that constantly tries to take it away from him.

Now, how has he survived this long then? Because he has developed coping mechanisms but this only slow his downfall. It won’t stop it.

His first coping mechanism is one that I find /incredibly/ interesting. And I’ve never seen anyone talking about it: Selective deshumanization

This existed before the mafia but Chuuya made it stronger after becoming a mafioso. I’ve said it before, even though chuuya has so many hero like characteristics the reason he is a morally grey character is that he chooses. He decides that certain people are more important than others, he knows that he can’t protect everyone, he knows that in order to protect his people, he will have to sacrifice other people. So chuuya deshumanize that group of people as a defense mechanism, he needs to stop himself from looking at them as individuals. If you want examples of it, there’s Dazai, Randou, Addam and Verlaine. At first I really thought that it was a coincidence but it happens enough to be an identificable pattern. When skk met, Dazai got obsessed really fast, chuuya didn’t. Chuuya tried to keep his distance as much as possible because he knew that Dazai was an enemy. He didn’t make personal questions even though it was obvious that he found Dazai’s behavior weird, he refused as much as possible to give him personal information and more subtle but more important, Chuuya absolutely refused to call him by his name. He used lots of insults but never his name even when it was clear that he knew it, that was him trying to keep as much emotional distance as possible. And the moment he used it? It was over for him, because from there it doesn’t matter how much he tried he could never stop himself from looking at Dazai as a human being, worse than that, he ended up understanding him even against his wishes. Same happened with Arthur, he was just another crazy man obsessed with Arahabaki but the moment he talked about Verlaine? About how he was doing everything for his friend? He became a real person, he could identify with. Addam? Was just a bothersome machine, he also refused to call him by his name but by the end of it chuuya was using corruption because he considered Addam a friend that he loved regardless of his origin. Verlaine fucking ruined his life and killed the most important people in his life but once chuuya understood his reasons and his past, he empathized with him and defended that he indeed was a human being at the end of the day. What I’m trying to say is that chuuya tries to keep his emotional distance by deshumanizing people but he kinda fails. A LOT.

The second one is the anger. Chuuya can’t express his emotions easily, a lot of it came from the fact that he always had to be the strongest so it was impossible for him to express vulnerability and then he went into the mafia and if there’s a bad place to be vulnerable, this is it. Chuuya deals with every strong emotion transforming it into anger because that’s an emotional he can control. The devastating thing is that It doesn’t only apply for bad emotions, even when he is happy or grateful he feels like he can’t express it and that makes me want to jump from a very tall something.

The third one is evasion. I find this particularly funny because in almost every fanfic Dazai is the one that evades his feelings and just decides to stop thinking about certain stuff when in canon the one that does that is chuuya. Dazai intellectualize as a way of dealing with feelings because he doesn’t know how to process them, and he overthinks a lot because he can’t stop himself from doing it. That is why his brain is his worse enemy. Chuuya, on the other hand, just evades. He supress all the emotions that he can’t exteriorize as anger, he supress his worst fears and his biggest insecurities, he put all of it into a mental box and throws away the key. But they are still pretty much there, lurking in the dark. Most of his “instinctual” actions are in reality guided by all of this things that he is trying so hard to hide.

And the last one? Is probably the worse one. We already establish that Chuuya can’t deshumanize the people in his group so he tries so absurdly /hard/ to protect them. He is always ready to sacrifice himself if by doing it he can save the people he loves, he carries too much, so the rest won’t have to do it, he takes the worse jobs, he is in the front lines, he is always ALWAYS the one to be hurt first. It may seem different but he is basically in the same situation as he was with the sheep. Except that now is not his people that are asking for his sacrifice, now he is doing it himself. Because he knows that the people he loves can be stolen from him in any moment, so he over compensates by doing everything he can to avoid it.

“The moment you get your hands on something worth going after, you lose it”- Dazai, Dark era.

Not in the same way, never in the same way because that would be sacrificing his humanity but chuuya’s thought process is not that different from Dazai. He doesn’t avoid relationships, though, he does everything in his power to avoid losing them JUST LIKE DAZAI DOES. Dazai knows that he can’t control everything, he knows that the world is absurd and full of irregularities but it’s terrifying to live in this kind of world, so he tries to predict everything, he tries to be three steps ahead of everyone else even if that make him feel less of a human being, because maybe then he can make a difference, maybe then he can protect what he has. Chuuya does basically the same thing, in order to protect his people, he will be the strongest, he won’t fall, he won’t ask for help, he will be the one carrying everything. Do you have an idea of how lonesome that is? To know that you can’t depend on anyone? Chuuya is a people’s person but he is so incredibly /lonely/. He can never be their equal because he is too busy trying to protect them. And this happens because the mafia is just like this, a place of sacrifices. A place of losses. It’s not a place for long lasting relationships.

At least two of this coping mechanisms lead him to deshumanization even when he tries his best to avoid precisely that. So chuuya basically lives in the worst dilemma in earth and this much contradiction will kill him one day.

The only reason he is still able to be there is because in his position as executive he had never been in a position in which he had to choose between his friends and the major benefit of the organization.

Chuuya as the next mafia boss? is laughable

The whole organization would crumble in DAYS. And that’s because chuuya goes against the single most important principle of the organization.

He is loyal to the people in the mafia, not to the organization

Chuuya will sacrifice the whole organization in a minute for its members, that’s literally the OPPOSITE of what the mafia stands by. He can’t sacrifice in cold blood a friend, he just can’t do it, that goes against everything that he is. He refused to sacrifice Adam even though at that moment that seemed like the only option to save the city and the mafia and he still REFUSED. Because he simply can’t sacrifice a friend. It’s impossible to him. Q is another good example of how much of a terrible leader chuuya would be. Believe it or not killing Yumeno was the opposite of what a proper mafioso should’ve done. There’s a reason Mori ordered to bring Q alive and that’s because rationally speaking yumeno is a weapon, killing him won’t bring back the people that already died and honestly speaking Q’s life is far more valuable than most of the mafiosos but for chuuya? It wasn’t the case, he couldn’t be rational because /his/ people died because of Q because for him was more important to prevent this from ever happening again than to use Q.

So to summarize chuuya is stuck, he can’t leave the mafia because that could be to go against his identity and sense of humanity but staying there is slowly killing him because it obligates him to go against everything he is and to be completely lonely in a place that is dead on deshumanization. So he basically lives in a state of pressure and constant stress while feeling trapped and saying to himself that he is where he should be. The ideal place for chuuya, funnily enough would be the ADA. And I’m not saying this for Dazai but because of the objectives of the ADA. A place that is oriented to people, a place that values relationships, a place that revolves around protection. It drives me mad everytime I think about how ridiculous ADA coded chuuya is only to be in the mafia.

Okay so basically that is the end of the rant, if you read all the way to here, congratulations and thank you for your time.

#bungou stray dogs #bsd chuuya #bsd dazai #soukoku #bsd #bsd spoilers #analysis #mafia analysis #bsd mori #me fangirling about chuuya #what’s new #this somehow is longer than the two past analysis #sorry for being depressing

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khalixvitae · 1 year ago

Text

★Stitched ★

Idia Shroud x Reader | ~5k words

Warnings: none really??? Idia is self deprecating as usual. Allusions to book 6 lore but no spoilers. I leaned into Idia’s weird hybrid inferiority/superiority complex (he’s frustrating and annoying but that’s my wife). I wrote way more than I intended lmao.

Info: GN Reader with no physical descriptions. slowish burn, potential to be friends to lovers? No resolution in the end, a smattering of angst bc Idia is… well he’s himself. Heavily based on his vignettes, Home Screen idles, etc etc (this is for the detail oriented baddies and by that I mean I have capital A Autism and I’ve been fixated on him for months). I have been very into the idea of Idia making cosplays and props since becoming obsessed w his Halloween card, so uh. Yeah! There’s no mention of what the reader’s costume is, so it can be whoever you want! Only mentions that it’s from a manga so go wild! <3

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When Ortho Shroud suggested that you commission his brother to build a prop for your Halloween costume, you’d agreed enthusiastically. You’d even said something about how sure you were that it would look great- a compliment he’d pass on to his reclusive sibling. After all, Ortho was living(?) proof of Idia’s handiwork, so making a prop would be playing on easy mode. Ortho did neglect to mention that his brother was not taking commissions (and frankly never would if Idia had it his way), but it wouldn’t be that big of an issue, right?

Wrong. The second Idia’s phone pinged with a message from an unknown number, from your unknown number, he was convinced he was going to die.

You were lucky you’d stated your case all in one message- if you’d started with just a greeting and expected small talk he would’ve just preemptively blocked you to avoid your little side quest. Besides, who messaged someone so early in the morning? Another look at his phone through bleary eyes would show that it was actually 6 pm, but nonetheless! He’d just woken up, so it was still far too early for that kind of shameless extrovert behavior. At least your message was pretty concise; Ortho had passed along his number because you wanted to commission him, and you’d offer payment in exchange. As clear as that was, there was still a lot to unpack. Ortho’s intentions to find friends for him were clearly at play here, which would’ve ground his gears more if it all wasn’t so well meaning. But giving someone his number for a cosplay commission? That felt a little excessive! What kind of meet-cute scenario was this? And how on earth did you plan to pay for a custom piece anyway? Not that he would actually make it, of course, but hypothetically. He’d heard through the grapevine (read: Azul’s chattering during board game club meetings) that you had a part time gig at Monstro Lounge, but surely you wouldn’t be spending your limited in-game currency on a cosplay prop. While he thought it would be a stupid decision, he had to respect your dedication.

Hypothetically, of course.

Despite any reluctant interest he had in knowing what costume you were putting together, there was no way he’d actually agree to a commission. Besides, it was probably a lame request anyway. And who cares if you’d probably (definitely) look great in your costume? Certainly not Idia, no sir. And he totally didn’t think about how happy you’d be if he were to accept your commission (which he’d never do, of course), or how you’d look holding a piece of his unquestionably perfect work. No, he wouldn’t lie awake thinking about any of that at all. Thus he decided to ignore your text indefinitely- it’s not like he had his read receipts on or anything. He’d just kick back, work on his own nearly finished costume, and maybe even send a halfhearted “soz, just saw this :/” a day or two before Halloween night. No unnecessary and draining social interactions, and you wouldn’t have to be inevitably disappointed by… well, by him. His craftsmanship was S tier without a doubt, but he had a charisma stat of 4 at most. So he’d just let the message sit there. That would be easier for everyone involved.

Well, that was the plan. But as it turned out, Ortho would have none of it. When he’d caught wind that Idia hadn’t bothered to answer your message a whole day later, he’d immediately bombarded his big brother with endless arguments for your case. It was the usual string of points- that Idia would be happier if he had irl friends (as if), that his general quality of life would improve if he had some positive social interaction (no way!), and so on. At least he was sure Ortho’s logic processors were working as irritatingly well as ever, though Idia found his points far too idealistic. But logos wasn’t the way to go when talking Idia into something he had no interest in doing- it would have to be pathos all the way baby, appealing to what really made him tick. Unfortunately for him, Ortho knew that too.

“I need you to make a friend before you graduate,” he said abruptly, arms crossed like he was prepared for a one shot k.o. “Just one. I’m sorry I gave them your number without permission, but I really think this could be fun. You make the coolest stuff ever, and it’s your favorite holiday, so I thought it was a good opportunity for you to talk to someone.” He was silent for only a moment, as if deciding whether or not to deliver the final blow. “I just need to know my big brother will be okay after graduation. And I’d like to see you have fun every once and a while, you know.”

There it was, the absolute punch in the gut Idia was dreading. “You see me having fun all the time, Ortho. We hang out every day.” It was a weak argument and he knew it.

“Yeah and I love hanging out with you, but that’s different! And I know other people would love hanging out with you, too! You’re the coolest person ever, big bro.”

And how could he ever say no to that?

“What’s the costume anyway?” Idia muttered, pulling his lower lip between sharp teeth.

“I’m not sure. They told me it was someone from a manga they really like! You should ask them about it!” Ortho was absolutely beaming. Something in Idia’s chest ached.

His response to your message was short and simple. He asked what your inspiration would be, and what prop you were looking for. Price could be negotiated, etcetera.

You responded with astounding speed; it made him nauseous. At least you were courteous, though. You gave him a lot of info to say the least- more than he needed considering he was a fan of the same series. Ortho had definitely known that, but that was a complaint for some other time. He had to admit it was a good choice- and the character you had in mind would suit you well (he’d never put that in writing so long as he lived). You sent him all of your inspo pictures- purely from the manga, you explained, as the anime adaptation had changed some of the details and you had a strong preference- as well as any measurements he might need. Idia couldn’t resist pointing out that the anime had made a number of phenomenal aesthetic choices, which did start somewhat of a tangent. Before he knew it, he was caught in a back and forth with you. It was… easy. Way easier than he had expected. When you stopped replying he was even a little disheartened; that is until he realized it was nearly 4 am. It had been that long of a conversation? Something about that made him warm all over. He’d ignore it for the moment.

When you messaged him back the following morning he felt the same rush of… something wash over him. And so a tentative back and forth between you two began. Draft sketches and material concepts on his end, and what felt like endless amounts of praise from you. That’s not to say you never brought any criticism to the table. You were just as fickle as he was, it seemed- and he liked arguing with you. Whether it was about the commission or over some unrelated tangent (which the two of you frequently succumbed to), there was something uniquely fun about debating your shared interests.

Over the week or so leading up to Halloween, your communication persisted outside of his prop updates. You even sent him photos of Grim! It was hard to stomach that he’d hit it off so well with some normie, but if you were sending him cat photos and had some (several) based media takes he’d tolerate that discomfort. Part of him kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, of course. The exchange was transactional- after Ortho delivered the prop to you, there would be no need to keep socializing with him. He couldn’t imagine why you’d want to anyway. Speaking of transactions, the two of you hadn’t decided on a price point. Or rather whenever you’d ask, he pushed the question aside by saying he ‘wasn’t sure yet’. He’d given you a relative range, but no exact number. He felt pathetic, but part of him didn’t even want to charge you for it. It wasn’t like he needed the money anyway, and Ortho had been right about the whole arrangement entertaining him. He couldn’t believe he was going so soft. But it wasn’t entirely his fault! Every time he’d start to work up the nerve to give a number, you’d do something so nice it made his head hurt. Sometimes it was asking questions about his games, or sending him voice messages so you could keep the conversation going when you couldn’t text. You’d even asked to vc once or twice! He’d denied that request, but nonetheless you asked! How was he supposed to follow that up? “Oh haha yeah, it’ll be like half your last paycheck sry lmao”? He’d rather die! He knew what his work was worth (and frankly so did you), but the idea of charging you that amount was a little nauseating. How fucking lame could he get?

And the other shoe did drop eventually, just not in the way he’d expected. It came as a lull in your late night banter, followed by ‘[name] is typing…’ for quite some time. That totally didn’t make him want to puke, no way. The message that followed was as short as it was sweet.

“Hey, so ik it’s not really your scene, but I’m having a Halloween thing at Ramshackle. Idk if I’d call it a party but yk it’s something. I was wondering if you’d want to stop by? If not that’s totally cool!”

Idia stared at that message for a while. Shit. Of course there was no way he’d go, not a chance, but he couldn’t just say that could he? He’d rather be dropped headlong into Tartarus than to go to some gathering of extroverts and npcs when he could be collecting his Halloween login rewards. At the same time, giving you a resounding ‘fuck no’ sounded just as unpleasant. So he just sat there and stared for a while before doing what he did best: he gave some vague, noncommittal answer.

“uhhh idk. I don’t wanna intrude haha. plus i have a raid planned so idk if i could make it sry”.

It seemed like you got what he was trying to say; Idia was beginning to resent just how well you listened to him.

“Totally get it! Just thought I’d ask :)! Send pics of ur costume tho! I wanna see it all put together :D!”

He tossed his phone aside, opting to throw himself face down in his pillow with a resounding groan. Why did you have to be so considerate? You had to have known he’d reject that request, so why even ask? And why did it mean so much to him that you had? His moping was interrupted by Ortho knocking at the door. Idia just grunted in response, turning his head to face him.

“What’s the matter bro?” Ortho hovered in the doorway, glowing eyes keenly focused on Idia’s sprawled figure. At times like this, only illuminated by blue screens and his own artificial fire, he had an uncanny effect that was hard to shake.

Idia peeked at him through his flickering bangs, huffing a little and sending the flames askew. He subsequently realized that they were streaked with a mortifying shade of pink, one that made him want to scream into the pillow all over again. “Nothing, I’m good. What’s up?” It was obviously a lie and he wasn’t helping his case by rolling over to face the wall.

“I wanted to see if you were up for a few pvp rounds before I set up to charge for the night. But what’s going on? My scanners detect no signs of physical injury, but your vitals indicate distress. Do you need medical attention?” Idia didn’t have to turn around to know his ‘brother’ had hovered closer.

“It’s nothing. It’s stupid-,” he planted his face back into the pillow defeatedly. “It’s- [name] invited me to some stupid Halloween thing.” It was muffled, but that didn’t matter. There was no way Ortho wouldn’t hear him, so there was no need to sit up.

“They invited you to a party? That’s awesome! We could go together! I know, you could even give them the prop in person and see their costume completed!”

“I’m not going.”

“What? Why not? You’ve had so much fun talking to them and working on this commission! You should go see them!” Ortho was gearing up for another uphill battle, one Idia was once again going to resist him on.

“Because I don’t want to. You can go, I guess. I mean I’m sure you’re invited. That’s probably why they asked me, right? Because we’re a package deal? You’ll have more fun without me there to weigh you down. And anyway, I don’t wanna be around that many people. It’ll probably be total npc shit anyway.” He fell silent for a moment, the quiet whir of machine fans filling the air in his stead. Ortho didn’t try to interject.

“It’s not like- it’s not like they wanna see me anyway. Maybe my costume, I mean its S tier, but not me. And I can’t even get on a vc with them- I’d be seriously delusional if I thought I could hang out with them irl.”

“Hey, they totally want to see you. I mean, I’m sure they want to see your costume too. But I know they want to see you. If you don’t feel like going that's okay, but I don’t want you to miss out because you think their invitation wasn’t genuine.”

“Why? Like I know we get along fine over chat, and they’ve interacted with my tablet, but what if they see me irl and get all weirded out? ‘Oh, why is he blue all over? What’s with his teeth? Ewww’. I think I’ll pass.” He chewed at his sleeve, nervous over the mere prospect of facing you like that. “Even if they’ve seen me in passing like once, being up close is a whole other level.”

There was another long pause before Ortho spoke again. “They like your hair.”

“What?”

“They told me they like your hair. Like you said, they’ve seen you irl once or twice in passing. Should I play the recording for you?”

Idia felt a little conflicted about that. It felt a little invasive somehow. But a far less conflicted part of him (his massive ego) needed to hear it, and ultimately triumphed. “Yeah, fine. Go ahead.” He curbed his anxious enthusiasm by biting his sleeve even harder.

“Sure thing! Commencing playback.” There was the sudden background noise of hallway chatter, followed by your voice. “I think I saw your brother in the library yesterday. Well, I’m assuming it was him, he looked a lot like you. He’s got great hair, I’ve never seen anything like it. It must’ve taken forever to grow it out that long.”

There was a measured click as the clip came to a stop. “Recording ends. See? They don’t think you look weird. And there’s nothing else in my data logs to indicate that they would.”

“That’s… not exactly reassuring,” Idia muttered, watching as the mess of curls surrounding him flickered to life with the same rosy hues as before. Of course you wouldn’t tell Ortho that you thought he looked weird, that was his brother. But nevertheless, that was technically a compliment. A win was a win right?

“We should go, I think they’d love to see you there in person. We could even go super early to drop off the prop and leave before everyone else gets there,” Ortho chimed in, clearly trying to find some loophole in his brother’s anxiety. “And we can show off our costumes again.” There was another long pause.

“Fine. But just to drop it off.”

The remaining few days passed without incident, aside from Idia’s mounting anxieties (which he was sure would culminate in sudden death). Half dressed for the function, he sat on the edge of his bed and sent you photos of the final product. At the very least he was sure you’d like it- how could you not? He was a master craftsman after all. Your response came back at the typical lightning speed. He doubted he’d ever get used to that.

“Holy shit, it’s perfect??? Thank you so so much, I love it!! <3 did u sign it?”

“no lmao?? y?”

“Bc it’s your work??? And u should be proud of it and put ur name on it ??? Duh??? And bc I want you to ofc.”

Well that was certainly unexpected. He sat there for a minute and mulled it over- what could you possibly gain from him signing it? Did you really just want that, plain and simple? God you were fucking weird. It did feel kind of nice though. Nice enough for a smile to fight its way onto his face as he meandered back to his workstation. What was the harm in indulging that request?

“can do ig. i charge extra for autographs tho, soz. so ik ortho was gonna drop this off, but is it cool if i come? want to make sure it doesn’t need any adjustments etc yk”

Even though it took him a few (fifteen) minutes to type, it came out smoother than he’d expected. He’d consider it a win. Of course the piece didn’t need any adjusting, it was perfect and he knew it, but he had to justify his sudden appearance (mostly to himself).

“You can make it ??? Nice !!! Yeah ofc! Come over whenever :D !!! <3”

Hearts. Were you trying to kill him? And why did your texts read like the logs of a dating sim? Maybe he should lay off the otome games.

Getting fully into costume was a little more complicated than he’d anticipated. Combined with putting the finishing touches on Ortho’s matching specs and engraving an insignia onto your prop, there was no way the Shroud duo would arrive early. In fact, they’d be perfectly punctual (which Idia loathed). Halfway up the driveway to Ramshackle he started digging his heels into the dirt. Even from a distance he could see light streaming through the dingy windows, along with far too many figures crowded on the porch. Part of him wondered how many students such a dilapidated structure could support- he decided to drop that train of thought before he collapsed in your front yard. “Hey- maybe this is a bad idea. Even if they wanna see me-“

But it was too late. Cater was the first to spot the two, and immediately came down the stairs to greet them. Oh great, a boss level extrovert right off the bat? He had to get out of here!

“Hey hey! I didn’t expect to see you two here! Ooh, whatcha got there? And nice costumes! Did you make them yourself?” The redhead had a cup in one hand and his cellphone in the other, his head cocked as he observed the brothers.

Idia’s mouth just sort of stopped working, and the more questions Cater asked the more he wanted to dip out. Luckily Ortho was way better at navigating normie conversations.

“Hi Cater Diamond! [Name] invited us! And yes my brother made our costumes, aren’t they so cool? We’re kind of in a hurry though, we have the last piece of [Name]’s costume! Once we get it to them, we’ll have more time to talk.” He started to move past Cater, who was now more than ready to usher them through the throng of people in the foyer. Idia followed behind in amazement. Having Ortho around was such an op move.

“Oh nice! They should still be upstairs. Once they’re all set the three of you should come back down so I can snap your pics, ‘kay? You guys really went all out!” Cater slipped away easily before either brother could refuse his invitation. Well, Idia would just have to make sure the coast was clear when he decided to make his escape. The two made their way up the rickety staircase (seriously, how was this place still standing?) and onto the landing above. Your bedroom door was open so at the very least you were easy to locate. Before Idia would go any further he slipped on the pumpkin helmet, properly obscuring his face. That felt a little better- maybe he’d actually be able to look at you.

He lingered behind Ortho as if it would block him from your view (despite being much taller than the android model), knocking at the door frame twice. “Uh… hey. Can we come in?”

You looked up from your phone with a start, eyes widening as you took them in. “Idia? Wait, holy shit, you guys look sick.” You were fully in costume- had you been waiting for them? The way you said his name nearly made him keel over right then and there. “Like I knew they would be cool, but this is insane.” Your gaze flickered to the prop in his hands. “And that’s for me? Dude, it’s perfect. Seriously, thank you so much. I’m so glad you came.”

Idia didn’t process half of it, including you taking the prop from his grasp. You looked so good he felt lightheaded. Forget talking to you, now he was worried about remaining upright. “You- uh- yeah. You too,” he stammered weakly. You too? That didn’t make any sense! “I mean- I mean you look cool. And yeah this is for you.” Breathing in the helmet was a bit of a challenge and he couldn’t recall a time his throat had ever been drier. Ortho made no effort to intervene either- he was just watching, practically on standby mode as his brother made a fool of himself. Great. So much for his op cheat code.

He decided that looking anywhere but at you was his best option, his eyes scanning along the walls of your bedroom. It did look liveable, he’d give you that much. You even had a small shelf with a decently sized manga collection- considering how long you’d been there and the wages Monstro paid, he was kind of impressed. It was cute (you were cute). Your voice snapped him back out of his meditative scanning.

“Sorry there are so many people. I would’ve given you a heads up, but I had no idea it would be this crazy. People just started posting about it and,” you sighed. “So now like half the school is in my condemned house. Happy Halloween I guess? Deuce and Jack got a few of the other first years to preemptively agree to help with post party cleanup, so that’s nice.” You were still looking at him intently; Idia had to remind himself that you were checking out his costume and not him, of course. Unfortunately that didn’t stop the ends of his hair from flickering a dull but obvious pink. He knew it caught your attention, but you didn’t mention it. Instead you opted to change the subject entirely. By the Seven, how were you so good at this? “Anyway, I wanna hear all about your costumes. I got bits and pieces over messages but give me the rundown!”

Now that he could do.

Infodumping was an art form, and boy had Idia Shroud mastered it. From the materials he used to the classic inspo, he was more than happy to tell you all about his creations. It took him a little warming up, but he was quickly in full swing. Down to the sound effect rigging, he gave you a thorough explanation of his work. You seemed particularly delighted in how he and Ortho’s costumes were a matching pair, and of course that opened the floor for him to explain the intricacies of making new specs for his brother. In his excited haste, he’d even taken off the helmet to show you its interior. He didn’t notice for quite a while, nor did you make any mention of it. You just watched him, smiling and nodding attentively. By the time he picked up on just how greatly his range of vision had improved, it was far too late. With his peripheral unblocked he also realized that Ortho was gone. A wave of panic washed over him as he reassessed his surroundings. It was just the two of you, standing beyond the threshold of your bedroom, alone. How long had he been talking? And why were you looking at him with those big, starry eyes? He tried to tell you to stop staring, but no sound came out. Once again, Idia was convinced he was going to die.

You definitely caught onto his nervous demeanor- he wished you’d stop doing that. “Hey, so how much do I owe you?” You asked, your voice gentler than he’d realistically want it to be. Why were you being so nice to him? You had the prop already, so just kick him out! There was a whole party going on downstairs, yet here you were spending god only knows how long alone with him! Wasn’t that depressing?

“Nothing. Don’t worry about it. It wasn’t a hard ask, and only noobs care about production costs,” he muttered, his tone not entirely unkind but thoroughly dismissive nonetheless.

“Oh- are you sure? Idia, it’s really beautifully done. Even if it wasn’t hard to do, you still took the time to do it. I owe you something.”

“I could make another one in my sleep. Just take it,” he was planning his escape, but could see no easy way out besides just turning tail and running. “Sorry for uh- well, for keeping you up here for so long. You’ve got a party to get to.”

“I’ll take it if you’re sure. Thank you, seriously. And don’t apologize, I like talking to you. I know this really isn’t your scene, so I really appreciate you coming out tonight.” The way you looked at him had him itching to put the helmet back on in record time. Your next words would foil even that half baked plan and freeze him in place. “If you wanted, maybe you could come over and hang out sometime? It’s not normally this crowded, it’s usually just Grim and I. You’re welcome here whenever, and so is Ortho.”

Every turn of phrase felt like you were whittling a hole in his brain, which made it increasingly difficult to think straight. What angle were you trying to work here? Was it just to embarrass him? He couldn’t think of a single thing you could gain from befriending him, which frankly made your kindness even more concerning. You had him one friendly gesture away from counting five things he could see, four things he could touch, and so on in the middle of the function. “I’m gonna go find Ortho,” he stated, abruptly turning on his heel. Now was not the time to go nonverbal, but that was steadily where he was headed. And he’d been doing so well! He’d talked to you irl, face to face! You hadn’t even seemed grossed out- if anything it felt like the opposite (which he would ignore). But of course his brain had to catch up and ruin everything. No, he had to ruin everything, just like always. This fucking sucked. The pumpkin helmet was back on, and he wasn’t showing his face until he was safely back at Ignihyde.

“Oh! Yeah, of course. I’ll walk down with you.” You wasted no time following after him, still holding your new prop. The trip down the main staircase was a silent one, but the raucous sounds of the party below more than made up for it. You didn’t push him to speak, which he was begrudgingly grateful for.

It was no surprise that your arrival from upstairs with Idia in tow drew a little attention. Cater even snapped a photo, saying something about how “cammable” you two looked (Idia didn’t have the strength to wonder where that photo would end up). You handled your entrance to the gathering like a pro, deflecting all the attention away from him with a small smile. He really couldn’t decide whether or not he hated how considerate you were, but that would be a viable train of thought once he was safely in his own bedroom. As he slipped away to find Ortho, he heard you discussing your costume with those gathered at the bottom of the stairs. Working up the nerve to risk a look back, he saw you proudly showing off the piece he’d made for you. The way you were so eager to credit him for it was debilitating.

Part of him wondered what would happen if he walked back over and joined the crowd. He knew he didn’t belong there, of course, but hypothetically. He couldn’t stop himself from imagining what it would be like to stand there by your side for just a little longer, to even let people photograph the two of you together. You hadn’t seemed to mind it a moment before. But maybe you were just being nice. You were always so nice. Regardless these were only hypotheticals, and he was bound to ruin your time if he stayed any longer. He’d be doing you a favor by leaving, right?

Right. With one last look at you, he resolved to find Ortho and get the hell out while he could, for your sake and his own.

Maybe next year, then.

——————————————————————————

Tag list: @v-anrouge @vtoriacore @phoneymedic @gum-gum-time @heatofmyexoheart (dm to be removed or added! <3)

Soz for not posting for a while (and this late as hell Halloween fic eek!), I obliterated my ankle about a week ago and have just been taking time to recover (that is a lie I’ve had to go to work every day on it but I digress!!!)

#twst #Idia shroud #twisted wonderland #x reader #idia x reader #fics ! <3 #khalix writes （＾＿＾）☆#idia post （ ; ; ）<3

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musiciansmaid · 9 months ago

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Some middle of the night thoughts about the enrollment process at Night Raven College as I desperately try to draft up a story but there’s so much about this school that I just don’t understand!

(slight spoilers for Book 7):

In the beginning of the game, it’s heavily stated that not just anyone can get into NRC, the Black Carriage has to arrive for you, something Grim had been waiting for for a while

I had always assumed there would be some kind of application process and basically you don’t know that you’ve made it until it shows up, right?

we find out from Lilia that he had received his acceptance letter like 500 years ago out of the blue, no application needed. Thus debunking my previous theories

But that was 500 years ago, surely the process must have changed?

It could have, but it’s implied that Lilia only changed his mind once Malleus was accepted. He fished out his old letter from the archives and was able to enroll simply because he had it

Even Crowley said he’d never imagine someone would show up with a 500 year old acceptance letter

SO, based on purely the way Crowley is when it comes to school traditions, I don’t think much - if anything - has changed

So to sum up what we know (or what makes sense to me so far): Teenagers across Twisted Wonderland’s only hope of going to NRC isn’t some mysterious Black Carriage randomly appearing at your house to whisk you away like I dreaded- it’s a mysterious Black Envelope arriving at your house to congratulate you on getting in!

At least you get some kind of heads up which is nice, right? There must be some way of accepting your enrollment via the letter, then the Carriage loads you up in your coffin come the start of the school year to bring you to orientation

(Don’t even get me started on orientation, I’ve been trying to crack this code between the game and the manga and I just can’t make heads or tails out of how that process is so if anyone has any ideas I’d love to hear them, otherwise I’m just gonna make up my own thing for my fanfic)

Anyway, I know it’s a long shot but I hope we get more school lore in future chapters/books. Like how come Ramshackle is abandoned if it used to be a dormitory and why is it the only one not connected to the hall of mirrors? What was the associated color for the dorm? The characteristics of the students that were sorted there? Disney I beg of you, as someone who adores the Haunted Mansion- I need the lore!

Okay, end of my rant. If anyone had anything else to add, I’d greatly appreciate it!

#twisted wonderland #night raven college #mini rant #twst chapter 7 spoilers #twst book 7 spoilers #twst crowley #twst lilia #twst malleus #twst wonderland #seriously how is orientation supposed to go?#lilia vanrouge #malleus draconia #ramshackle dorm #haunted mansion

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devilrosola · 2 years ago

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I'll take this as an invitation {as well as any excuse to actually DISCUSS things! so exciting!} to go down HC Street! 😁

From Naotora's first appearance, he immediately gives off Sinbad vibes! All the way to stealing the glory from Main.

(Orient Ep.3) Musashi had a goal and Naotora swoops in (saving his life) taking that achievement for him.

(Magi Ep.11) Similar to when Alibaba couldn't inspire his comrades in Balbadd, but Sinbad's leadership got everyone enduring and we got glimpses through the arc that Alibaba would resent Sinbad for stealing his thunder, although that was never covered to the extend my house anticipated.

But I wouldn't worry bout Naotora pulling a Sinbad on us though. (I mean there is the potential that he could but it would be a different path for different reasons this time.) I say this because in Magi Sinbad thought he was God and was meant to lead by being a beacon/goal for everyone else.

(Magi Chp.328) On the other hand, if Naotora was Sinbad reincarnated, he obviously internalized the lessons he learned from his Magi life and took a page out of Alibaba's book of leading by supporting beside.

(Magi Chp.307)

Being a Singularity, an unprogressing Sinbad would accept nothing less than a White Soul. But Naotora does not have a White Soul, he has a Blue Soul. The most common kind around. Ordinary. Plain.

But still he is a leader. And encourages other Blueblades to be proud of themselves and strive to be their best.

(Orient Ep.20 - Naotora inspiring other Blueblades) He's among the 5 strongest generals, but he doesn't insist that the power is for him alone...

(Adventures of Sinbad Chp.181)

(Magi Chp.339)

...but shares it with comrades and actually relies on others.

(Orient Ep.23)

Naotora is humble enough that I don't think we'll have to worry about him suffering from having a God-complex 👍

BONUS Similarity:

Look who also appears their own version of the 8 Generals:

(Orient Ep.3)

While Kouen...I mean Tatsuomi has Three Dragons

(Orient Vol.10 Extra, Chp.93) Yeah yeah not as close as 4 Household and not exactly 3 Djinn, but we gotta have some differences.

Close ups just to compare:

#anime spoilers #magi #orient #comparison #discussion #takeda naotora #sinbad #head canon #manga spoilers #speculation #screencap #I spent way more time collecting visuals for this than I should have

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neonscandal · 9 months ago

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jjk having queer-coded villains seems to be an intentional choice. what are your thoughts on this

Anon comin in hot today! I feel like this doesn't really need a spoiler warning though it does detail info about characters yet to be animated so read at your own risk.

To be honest, I wouldn't even say that it's coding, JJK has an assortment of characters with varied identities from our protagonists to our antagonists which includes:

Megumi - a lot of fans interpret his non-gendered answer to what his type is, focusing instead on personality, to mean that he's pansexual.

Mahito - genderless ✨ and/or physically lacking reproductive organs that would typically define gender binary

Tengen - presumably assigned female at birth, has since transcended gender or is more non-binary

Kenjaku - another character who's just.. lived so long that they're just kind of gender fluid? Though, considering their history, intersex may be more appropriate? We know that, as Noritoshi Kamo, he mixed his blood with what would become the cursed womb paintings but she actually consummated with Jin for some extra razzle dazzle

Uraume - canonically they/them

Kirara - assigned male at birth (though I believe canonically referred to as they/them) with an androgynous gender expression

Please note: I don't consider myself an expert on the matter as gender identity, expression and sexual orientation exist on spectrums. Subsequently, if you think any of the above characters belong elsewhere based on canon or headcanon, I get it. If, based on canon, I'm outright incorrect, feel free to drop a comment and I'll edit accordingly.

With the distribution of the above in mind, I don't think it's unilaterally something focused just among the antagonists. Though, ironically, some of my color coding is also debatable at this point, I suppose. I think the more interesting observation is that, with enough time, such labels aren't as binding or lack the need for definition. Like, Tengen has all the time in the world to be whatever they want to be and they simply become. In fact, unrelated but kinda related, you see a similar idea in Hell's Paradise with the mercurial gender fluidity of the Tensens, too. Honestly, that's another show to watch with a curious lens.

All that to say, I think the varied representation is more interesting due to the conversation around the mangaka's own identity. Gege Akutami's anonymity has been shielded by their pen name but, also, I don't believe they have confirmed pronouns. While people argue that they went to an all boys' school previously, they also, during a stint as an assistant on another manga, unveiled themselves with a femme presenting avatar. Seemingly to avoid being defined by visual perception (or to pre-emptively avoid recognition by devastated fans..), they appeared in a video interview dressed as Mechamaru. Couple that with the fact that there is a notable lack of romantic pairings within the story, especially those that would be typical of a shonen story. Arguably, that could leave a lot of Aro and/or Ace characters that I'm too obtuse to have picked up on. In fact, one could interpret Akutami's previous comments about Gojo accordingly.

Subsequently, I don't think the intention is to vilify queerness just because some of the antagonists fit the bill. I think, if anything, there's just representation that isn't necessarily cultivated around "othering" queer characters or using their diversity as a plot line, if that makes any sense? Which isn't just concentrated on the "bad guys". For the most part, these are just subtle realities of the characters... okay, Kenjaku's identity can definitely be charged to the plot though. 👀 Seemingly contrary to what I just said about diversity as a plot device, I'm now having mixed feelings specifically with Kenjaku because their identity does inform the plot but also intrinsically brings nuance to them as a character. The more I think about it, this diversity is actually what humanizes them which, connotatively, still seems like a positive thing. Hm. Maybe I'm a hypocrite? Not sure but I'm curious as to your thoughts so feel free to leave them below 👇🏾

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notallangelsaregood · 2 years ago

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My thoughts on Spy x Family Chapter 80

New chapter, new review, yeehaa! Everybody, calm down, calm down! This is not a drill! My heart is still beating fast from the excitement of this new chapter. I need to breathe in order to organize my thoughts and start here! Needless to say, manga spoilers ahead.

Firstly, thank you for all the support on my last review, I definitely was not expecting it, and I'm glad some of you (many!) enjoyed it, thank you, truly. I will keep uploading my thoughts here, since it's really pleasing to write about something I absolutely adore. Now, let's start! (well, I spent 10 unexpected minutes trying to find this chapter online in English, this was quite frustrating, but oh well, that's life. Thanks to the discord server, you saved my ass).

I'm surely glad Endo and his team choose to not time skip this, I mean, genuinely glad. Honestly, I was afraid of that, many important subjects of the manga (specially TwiYor related) has been time skipped or not given the right amount of attention immediately. Have you guys noticed that too? It's not exactly a complaint, I understand some matters need to be addressed later. But, yeah, I'm thrilled they went right into the next day, It shows that this matter is really relevant for some sort of change in their dynamics, at least, I believe that.

Loid is such a great husband and father material, I mean, look at him! His slightly messy hair, not combed back, gives him such a carefree look. And little miss Anya is as adorable as ever.

Becky is a whole mood! Martha covering her mouth had me rolling. Our girl is totally amazed by her crush. And so are we, I mean, can we judge? Look. At. Him! His tiny smile when he says 'good morning'.

Our poor assassin is shaking with nervousness. Again, can we judge her? LOOK AT HIM. Okay, sorry, overreacting is my coping mechanism. By the way, I love Yor's hair down, she looks lovely.

All right, Loid is charming, asking if she rested well and worried about her drinking. I don't believe this is a façade, he is truly worried about her, he always is, but unable to admit it is not solely for the mission. And Yor thinking her coworkers being right, our girl is so confused.

Her face, look at her face. Her train of thought is not at all well oriented. For me, appearing normal to her equals being accepted by others, but mainly by her family she doesn't yet realize she loves. Besides, being normal to her also means covering up her job, which means protecting and being able to provide a better country for the ones she loves. I think that's quite honorable, and it mirrors a lot of Twilight's principles.

She is so hesitant, simply because she doesn't know. She doesn't have any gripes, but by believing that having them equals normality, she is totally pushed to find something, besides, she is worried about Loid having gripes about her and that's lovely.

We all know Yor has problems with her self-esteem when she is not in her Thorn Princess mode, and she worries a lot about being a good wife and mother to Anya. So, this is something recurrent on her mind, which leaves her insecure and I believe Loid gives her confidence to speak up and try to be better for them. Again, she is honorable and so is he. Moving on!

The PANIC™ on his face. Our poor spy was not expecting this at all. And WORSE, he is a highly trained spy on human expressions, but still, he can't tell she is lying, his train of thought is not oriented as well. I wonder, what is blurring it? What is provoking his lack of discernment? I wonder.

Damn, Yuri, what a great timing. Again, look at Loid's expression. He is devastated. Poor man. I'm still perplexed at his lack of insight, he is the best Spy of Westalis, a legend, but still, Yor disarmed him. And that means a LOT about their dynamic.

Needless to say that I burst out laughing. I love Yuri's intensity.

Yor defending Loid is so charming. And Yuri is a mood, we can't say he is a bad brother. He tries to be present, but I believe he is trying even more now that Yor is married, it's funny to see. Also, he just goes in? Like, does he have the key or something? Haha.

'I just wanted to make our marriage look normal too' again with this concept of ideal normality. She is constantly trying, for her own reasons, but for them.

Loid is so done, haha. And Yor stuttering when she said they are not getting divorce, our girl is nervous, she wants this family so bad.

Twilight mode: ON. Still, he is so nervous, deep down, this is not the best spy of Westalis. This is a man, a father, and a husband wanting for this to be fixed, for his wife to feel better. It's not for the mission, Loid, sorry to break it to you. Not sorry. He isn't even real. I'll be better when my medication kicks in, sorry.

'No, just since yesterday'. She is so... I don't even have the words. I guess, random? Look at her face. She is basically telling him 'Nah, I love you, I'm just confused about this very same topic'. She says he didn't do anything, be coherent, Yor! She can't, she is in love

And Loi Loi trying to calm down himself in the process of almost panicking over not being good enough for his wife is everything to me. There has to be a reason, he said. Yeah, duh, she wanted to kissy kiss you. Very much so.

'Inadvertent oversight', phew, am I really bilingual? Truly? Damn. Look at those dorks' faces when they are side to side, so cute, talking to each other before saying goodbye.

He is quite worried about her finding out about his true identity. I wonder if it is because he is, deep down, afraid she will leave him once she founds out. He doesn't want to be alone again. Almost lifeless, like Sylvia's life is now, without her family. Damn, I'm going to cry.

All I see is a Twilight trying to justify his genuine will to apologize, using “the mission” and spy protocols to cover it. Nothing can convince me otherwise, am I delusional? Probably, girl, go take your meds.

Poor Loid, he is so confused. It reminds me of one of the last chapters where he is like 'real marriage sure sounds difficult'. Oh, well, it hits close to home, huh? I see what you did here, Endo.

This is not Twilight. Maybe, like, some percentage, but not all.

He is SO confused, I'm dying. She is basically telling him 'that's the problem, you are too perfect, I need to complain about something, make me suffer for the sake of normality in marriage (?)', I mean, Loid, ma boi, I would also be confused. And her blushing, so adorable.

Preach, girl! I mean, can we acknowledge how important is it that Yor said that? 'This is a marital issue between me and my husband!', no stuttering, no hesitation, to her own brother. This is HUGE.

I absolutely hate this phone. I could tear it down to pieces.

I love Yuri realizing Yor said that she is Mrs. Forger, he is so shocked it's funny to see. Also, she is getting used to it, to saying it, It's a huge improvement since the beginning of the manga. I already told you guys I absolutely hated this phone call?

Look at her blushing face when she comes out with a huge act. Loid's face is hilarious. And Yuri? Yes, boy, she is that eager to spend time with her husband. Kinda.

He is really sorry! Poor Loid. And Yor is cute, her reasoning gets me rolling every. single. time. She is a special girl, I love her.

BOND MA BOI, you lost the huge gossip going around your house like that? For a nap? I mean, It sure seems like a really good nap, but we kinda need you to see the future right now, If you wouldn't mind. And Yuri is wild, I love him, but he is totally wild. His mind is as... peculiar, as his sister's is.

'Even Yor?' Oh boy, you don't even know half of it, Loi-Loi.

Look at Yuri running. I'm so done. This chapter has served us a lot.

Yor is herself again! Loid's mind note: Never offer alcohol to Yor, ever.

No more images are allowed on my post, so I wanted to end it here with my view on the next pages. I'm surely worried. I mean, this is getting really serious. It is a whole new arc coming, and I'm worried about our cherished fake family. Yuri is on Ostania's side, receiving orders to not let WISE interfere, and Loid is defending Westalis and the peace between the countries at all costs. I'm wondering what could happen next. What are your guesses?

I'm sincerely worried about the documents being decoded and the positions of the agents being undiscovered, but mainly about Operation Strix, of course, they are my everything. My guess is that the documents will be recovered, however, so many things can happen in order for this to happen.

I thought a little bit about Yuri finding out about Twillight being Loid (in combat), but I believe that's unlikely, since our famous spy is a master in disguises. Yet, him finding out due to these documents being leaked does not sound pleasant. Can you tell I'm worried? I'm EXTREMELY worried, there are so many possibilities and I have no idea what will happen. I'm counting the days till the next chapter.

Hope you guys enjoyed my ultralonghowareyoustillhereandalive? Review. Feel free to comment what you think here. I'm posting this as I wrote, so if I find some grammar or spelling mistakes later on, I will fix it. 1731 words, more than 30 screenshots and a few hours later, phew, I'm tired. Thank you!

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