#Or someone who just wants to have no worries but leads to angst central

[venerawrites]

Hiii

Can ask for shino and shikamaru (separate) (angst)

A story about them having a crush on reader but then they found out that someone likes them too??

Maybe they were about to go see reader until they saw them with another boy 😭👊👊👊

author's note: wow, I took a while with this request, but I was waiting to be in the right mood so I can write it! I changed the story a bit with Shino, I hope that's okay! I really hope you enjoy and thank you so much for requesting! <3

Shino

Being best friends with Kiba had ton of pros - you always had something fun to do, his mom made the best fried spinach rolls and you also had unlimited passes to cuddle Akamaru any time you want. It also gave you the chance to join him and his teammates' training, despite not being a ninja yourself.

Spending so much time observing them, you grew somewhat closer with Hinata and Shino too.

The girl was shy and timid at first, but once she got to know you, she started to relax and speak more. For your surprise, she was also quite quick witted, offering remarks and comments the second Kiba said or did something foolish. You didn't had a lot of common, but she had a vast knowledge in very different areas and could keep up a good conversation on almost any topic.

Shino, on the other hand, was more difficult to get to know. The first few times you showed up at their training, he just silently nodded his head as a greeting, before continuing his sparring. Even when it was time for his break, he choose to sit by himself in the opposite side of the field, rather next to you. After a few months, however, your patience paid off and he started to have small chats with you, usually cantered either around nature or insects.

Naturally, at first you thought that maybe he didn't like you. You've seen him talk with other shinobi on the streets of Konoha, and he sounded quite blunt with the rest of his team, so you didn't think he was shy or embarrassed. But when you finally shared your thoughts with Kiba, he just laughed, resting his arm around your shoulders:

"Don't worry, Y/N! He is like that with everyone - trust me, I know him like the back of my hand!"

Unbeknown to you, meters away, standing in one of the many alleys leading to the central road, was the devil himself. Shino's eyes remained focused on the hand around your shoulder, his lips instinctively pressing into a thin line.

Shino often questioned how did he got to his current position.

Being in a team with the Inuzuka, he knew who you are before he even met you - Kiba never missed a chance to say how beautiful and funny his best friend is, and how one day they are going to finally gain the courage to ask them out. At first, Shino didn't think much of it - his teammate was famous for getting a new crush every second week of the month.

But soon every second week turned into a whole month and then to six months, before it was finally a full year and Kiba got bold enough to bring you to one of their training practices.

Oh, how wrong it felt for Shino's breath to hitch in his throat, the moment he laid his eyes on you for the first time! Thankfully his stare was well hidden behind his dark glasses, because he was sure if the other boy noticed, he wouldn't hesitate to attack and that would surely affect his team's future dynamic.

Knowing he should not lust after his friend's interest, the man tried his best to stay away. He avoided talking with you, sitting near you or even looking at you for too long. The more he resisted this pull he felt toward you, however, the harder it got to control himself.

"What if I just give myself a little taste? Maybe once I get to know them, all these feelings would fade away", he thought to himself when he finally got brave enough to sit next to you.

Any hope he had that he would lose interest once he talk with you, quickly disappeared into thin air, once you looked at him with your big eyes, eagerly nodding for him to continue his explanation about dragonflies and the metamorphosis after their larval stage. He wasn't used to someone questioning him so much or show such keen interest in what he was talking about, so when you did, he couldn't help but realise he was in love.

Shino considered himself a good and loyal friend. But as he watched Kiba wasting his time with you, he started to feel selfish.

Why shouldn't he show you his interest? His teammate was obviously not going to do it, so it was technically not a stabbing in the back... right? It was your choice at the end of the day who do you want, but he had a right to compete for your heart too!

After months of thinking it over and over, Shino knew he had to tell you how he felt, even if the risk of you rejecting him was big. But as he watched Kiba sitting you down on one of the benches, his hand still around your shoulder, while the other one shyly pulled a flower from behind his back, he knew he was too late.

He had lost without even being given a chance.

Shaking his head, he threw the small box of your favourite chocolates bonbons in the nearby bin, before turning away and stuffing his hands in his pockets. The sound of your laughter ringed behind him and he had to stiffen his whole body, stopping it from taking a glance and breaking his heart even more.

Maybe one day things would be different - it would you be you and him on that bench, and he would pour his whole soul in front of you, promising you the world if you only give him the chance for him to give it to you.

Maybe one day he would be able to be with you, without feeling the rotten feeling of guilt and disgust with himself.

Maybe one day, but today was not that day.

Shikamaru

Clear days like these were rare - no clouds, no wind, not even the slightest movement in the air - just the unforgiving sun shining brightly at the Village Hidden in the Leaf. Time felt just like a concept when the hours kept dragging slowly after one another, each feeling like a whole eternity.

A loud yawn escaped Shikamaru's lips and his feet dragged through the dirt, making their way to the training grounds where he was sure you will be. While you didn't posses any special abilities or unique jutsu techniques, nature has gifted you with extremely sharp mind, wide imagination and skilful hands, which were able to build any type of weapon. When you were not away on a mission or hanging out with Shikamaru, you liked to spend your time resting the improvement to your latest gadgets.

The friendship that blossom between you two in your late teens was both surprising and unexpected. Back at the Academy you both shown quite hostile behaviour toward each other and while you were not exactly “enemies”, you couldn’t stand each others presence. The Nara boy did not like how loud, unpredictive and spontaneous you are, seeing your carefree attitude as both annoying and dangerous, especially during missions.

On the other hand, you were also not a fan of him. While you acknowledged his intelligence and gift for coming up with quite interesting strategies, his laziness, sarcasm and constantly bored expression were something you would never want in a fellow comrade.

Yet, a few years later you were almost inseparable. His knowledge combined with your handiness made you a powerful duo and you were often combined in missions together, especially when it came to tracking and ambushing rogue ninjas. What started as strictly shinobi work soon turned into daily hangouts. You learned from each other and often spend whole nights talking and brainstorming how to better your teamwork.

But respect and friendship were not the only thing growing between you two. Shikamaru didn't know when or how exactly it happened, but one morning he woke up next to you on the sofa, after both of you fell asleep playing shogi, and he looked at you, suddenly realising what the funny feeling inside of his chest was. He reached out to you that day, gently removing the hair out of your peacefully sleeping face and wishing that one day he will wake up next to you as your lover, not just the friend you accidentally fell asleep next to.

Months passed since that time and he never said even a word about his feelings. Every day you met at the exact same spot and exact same time, spending your whole days together, just like you were before. You continued acting the same way, enthusiastically talking about your latest inventions, completely unaware of your friend's longing looks and blushing cheeks. Or maybe you were aware, but you were nice enough not to say anything about it.

Shikamaru rarely felt fear, but for weeks now this was the main emotion squeezing his heart. What if you didn't return his affection? What if you wanted to just be friends? What if you realised his feelings and decided to take a step back, thus making him lose you forever?

All these questions were actively torturing his brain every waking minute, but as he stood near the entrance of the training grounds, watching you laughing, head buried in Naruto's chest, he couldn't help but squeeze his hands into fists.

What was this dobe doing? And since when you were SO close?

Feeling someone's glare burning the back of your head, you lifted your head from the blonde's jacket, before turning around. Spotting your best friend near the gates of the grounds, you ignored his narrowed eyes and annoyed frown, instead waving your hand high in the air.

"Shika!", you smiled brightly, pulling away completely from Naruto's embrace, "You are late today!"

The black haired male only hummed in response, slowly walking over to you, his eyes dancing between you and his other friend. While your demeanour seemed normal, the Uzumaki's face was all red and he kept glancing at you every few seconds, his teeth deep into his bottom lip.

"Am I interrupting something?", the words came out heavy with sarcasm and your brows immediately furrowed. Shikamaru hasn't used this tone since your academy days, when he took any chance to show his dislike toward you.

Naruto finally acknowledged the other male, one of his hands making his way toward the back of his neck, where he nervously scratched the skin. He grinned at the Nara, stepping over to him and extending his arm for a handshake.

"H-Hey, Shikamaru! Didn't expect to see you here, heh...", his hand shamefully retracted, once the other boy did not take it, instead glancing at it with disgust. You watched the weird interaction, while pulling your weapons in your bag, confused at why both of them were acting so strange in each other's presence. They were not the best of friends, but they were still pretty close and it was unusual of them to be that nervous around each other.

"I was just asking Y/N if they want to come and grab some ramen with me-"

"They are busy", Shikamaru impatiently interrupted, briefly moving his eyes to you, "We have plans already."

The blonde man let out a small "oh!" and he looked over to you with a confused expression. Having all your weapons neatly packed in your bag, you stood next to both of them with crossed arms, you face twisted in annoyance.

"Actually...", you moved over to Naruto, taking his hand in yours and giving him a small smile, "I am so starving, I would love to have some ramen now! If you go and wait for me near the gates, I will be there just in a minute."

The man smiled at you, nodding his head at your words, before reaching toward your shoulder and taking the heavy bag from you. He passed Shikamaru, nodding his head as a goodbye, but the dark-haired male was too busy glaring at you in order to give any type of response.

Once Uzumaki was at a safe distance from you, you turned your attention back to your friend, almost hissing at him:

"What the hell is your problem?"

He scoffed at your words, one of his brows arching high up.

"Naruto?", his name feel out together with a mocking laugh from his lips, "Really? You are ditching me for Naruto?"

You rolled your eyes, both annoyed and baffled by his bizarre behaviour.

"I'm not ditching you!", you defended yourself, before crossing your arms once again, "I am absolutely starving and technically, laying in the middle of a field and sleeping is hardly counted as "plans". Naruto was nice enough to ask me to join him-"

"That dobe likes you! His face looked like he was about to explode when he was next to you!", Shikamaru didn't even wait for you to finish your sentence, before huffing at you. He took a step closer, his jaw clenching, "I though you are better than entertaining stuff like these from... people like him."

The way he said these words, filled with so much venom and dislike... You didn't know who the man before you was, but he was definitely not your best friend.

"Dobe? People like him?", you repeated, taking a step back, "Okay, calm down Sasuke 2.0! Don't get your panties in a twist and go rogue or something, because you can't handle the idea of me hanging out with people other than you!"

Before he can reply, you stepped around him, making your way toward Naruto, who was patiently waiting for you near the gates of the training grounds. After a few steps, you looked back, your eyes full with dissapointment:

"I really thought time has changed you... If you decide to stop being a d*ckhead, you know where to find me! Goodbye, Shikamaru!"

The young Nara stood there in the middle of the grassy field watching your figure become smaller and he loudly gulped, when he saw the blonde taking your hand in his. He knew he acted irrationally, based on his jealousy and anger, and know as there was nothing but silence around him, he realised that maybe he did already lost you forever.

cc artwork: Clement Tingry

[finnoky]

DKAU - Part 1 (Pre Movie)

These are drabbles and ideas but a vague idea of how the Kingdoms work in this AU (There will be more parts, I just divvied them up for my own sanity)

So… Enjoy

In this Eugene was raised as a prince in the Dark Kingdom, alongside Varian as a little brother figure.

Part 2  | Part 3

The Queen still passed, but Edmund was prevented from evacuating the kingdom by advisers and the fact a lot of people had nowhere else to go. Because of it’s climate the Dark Kingdom relied heavily on trade - They’d forge ironworks in exchange for food and resources! I can see them being a great ally in the past for kingdoms who want warriors. An industrial place where the people aren’t too well off. It’s crumbling but not exactly dead… usually overlooked thanks to it’s small population and hostile environment. It’s also steeped in tradition and somewhat respected for its dedication, though a little left behind thanks to it. The DK in general is secretive and a bit mysterious.

When Rapunzel is born, Quirin is sent as a convoy to Corona in securing a future arranged marriage between the prince and princess. This would secure the DK a powerful alliance and reinstate their kingdom amongst the 7, Corona would get a kingdom they could more or less rule over in addition to extra land and resources of their own. Their deal was agreed, Quirin sent back to the DK with papers for Edmund to sign.

The night Quirin leaves Corona, Rapunzel is taken. Theories speculate the DK took out the princess and said rumour quickly spreads. Made worse by Quirin defending himself and running from the royal guard. The Kingdom is ostracised and blamed for the Princesses disappearance, though no evidence links them to it and they continuously prove they were not involved. Rumours spread like wild fire (people always speculated the DK was sketchy and into dark magic anyway, so the bad rumours stick) leading to many trade routes getting ambushed and shut off.

Edmund allows those who want to leave to go - Leaving just himself, The Brotherhood, Eugene and a handful of loyal DK residents. Edmund, in fear of him or his son getting attacked, holes himself and Eugene up in the castle and forbids him from leaving the palace walls. Ever. This is also in an effort to ensure the kingdom doesn’t fall and Eugene learns how to be a king, as well as recieve training from the Brotherhood to become a capable warrior.

Quirin, Adira and Hector all take on roles outside their usual duties and frequently escort traders down routes. Eventually Quirin finds an injured woman from Corona and brings her back to DK. They fall in love, Varian comes along, etc. Eugene is initially jealous but then the two end up growing a very close brotherly bond, even to the point where Eugene selects Varian as his personal guard when the two are older. Following the death of Varians mum, Quirin is more apprehensive to allow Varian outside the palace meaning he subject to similar isolation as Eugene (though they find it better together)

Eugene gets very bored of black rocks and wants to see nature. All sneak out attempts fail. He’s very lonely since the few children who remain aren’t allowed to talk to him. He and Varian start plotting to escape their castle eventually for a joyride around the countries before Eugene’s Coronation. To ensure he can leave when the time comes Varian commits to a future position in the brotherhood.

They leave the kingdom because the rocks are just… SO bad. Their whole home is decimated, the moonstone overtaking their lives. Adira leaves the DK following nasty arguments regarding the potential finding of the Sundrop and banishing the rocks, though her message gives the future King an idea to do the same and indulge in some rebellion when the time comes. The time ends up being shortly after Varians 13th birthday as he needs to be sworn into the Brotherhood to allow them the chance to leave the walls.

Just days after Varians birthday - The kids steal a cart and supplies and hit the road. Hector is pissed off, Edmund is sure Adira poisoned their minds, Quirin is more… understanding. he knows the Kingdom is a bad environment and pretty close to falling. He and Hector set out to find the Prince and Varian. Quirin tells Hector he should stay around about the Great Tree as ‘Eventually the prince will return and it’s the best strategic place to stay’ which Hector agrees to. Quirin keeps heading to Corona.

They (Eugene and Varian) try to find the sundrop to reunite the stones and fix everything. It takes them a long time because there’s just so much to see and do! Hell, it’s so green and lovely out here. They run into Adira who points them in the direction of Corona and promises to offset any guards who come after them, though Eugene is still sceptical of her and feels she knows more than she’s letting on, while Varian seems to trust her judgement and insists they keep going.

[krisingtons]

Krisington's BNHA Fan Fiction List

The time has come for me to create a master list of all my BNHA fan fiction! If you are a Dadmight fan, then you are in the right place.

Fics will be organized based on their chapter count, then the one shots will be in a random order. Each will have a brief description and a link to the fic. All listed fics are complete. Fics with a * next to them are considered personal favorites.

Always mind the tags, but a couple things apply to all my fics at this time:

All fics are rated T or G.

None of the fics contain romantic relationships or character deaths.

Many of my fics contain manga spoilers.

These fics primarily contain fluff and angst.

This list will be updated as I write more fics.

Multi-Chapter

*Of Fingernails and Bangs

Bakugou and Todoroki finally have their provisional licenses, which allowed them to take down some villains on the way back from the exam. Izuku is beyond thrilled for them - really, he is. He can't help but compare their success against his own recent failures with Black Whip, though, and All Might's boasting about his classmates really doesn't help. So, Izuku revisits an old nervous twitch in his pent-up frustrations and worries.

(14 Chapters)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32011720/chapters/79292194

*The Stars Shine Brighter With Your Eyes Upon Them

Izuku Midoriya and All Might, after a bad week, find themselves making similar wishes on a shooting star. Their wishes are closer to coming true than either of them realize, but in order to bridge the gap, they need to confront some unspoken things between them. (8 Chapters)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31545599/chapters/78042695

Quirk Development Theories

The concept of Quirk Singularity is fringe enough that Izuku Midoriya and All Might have some difficulty learning more about it. Izuku is no stranger to finding unexpected things in research, but it still startles him to stumble upon a similar yet related theory along the way: Quirk Soulmate Theory.

OR: Having a close relationship with someone who has a similar quirk can create soulmate bonds, something All Might is wholly unprepared to deal with. (7 Chapters)

(This is the central work of the series with the same name. The other stories are in-universe shorter fics.)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30821336/chapters/76085843

Better Late Than Never

One simple movie night with Class 1-A is all it takes for All Might and Izuku to finally become truly vulnerable with each other. And once they open up, it makes room for all kinds of experiences a father and son might share. (5 Chapters)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30343908/chapters/74801388

If I Gave You Everything

All Might does what he can to teach Izuku Midoriya everything he knows, to give him everything he can, things big and small, the obvious and the less obvious. And while he's determined to never ask for anything in return, Izuku is the only one who can give All Might the one thing he really wants. (2 Chapters)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30701621/chapters/75762002

*Ocean-Dipped Feathers, Sun-Kissed Wings

One has feathers too young to fly. The other has wings too damaged to show. But as Izuku Midoriya and Toshinori Yagi bond during ten months of training on the beach, they each grow comfortable enough with the other to help their wings be the best they can be. Just as family would.

AKA: A Dadmight Wingfic. (2 Chapters)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33270901

Keep Reading for One Shots

*You who are many where we are one

The vestiges of One for All love Toshinori Yagi as much as Izuku Midoriya does. And now that they can make the smallest amount of contact with the ninth, maybe they can do more to care for the eighth.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/33586720

An Old-Fashioned Photo Album

As Midoriya helps All Might move into the new UA dorms, he comes across a piece of memorabilia for the old hero. This leads to a series of revelations and confessions from each of them.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30321408

*The Oracle

The Oracle’s quirk allows her to see the name and a defining color of a person’s greatest joy. She readily uses it to thank those who have done her a great service.

There are two who have been bestowed this gift. Each has been given the name of the other. One knows, the other does not.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30542814

For a Moment In Between

As Izuku Midoriya and All Might wait for Izuku's gauntlets to arrive from America, All Might takes Izuku somewhere he's never been before. He claims it's an attempt to teach him a hard truth about death, but Nana Shimura's vestige knows better. She knows there's something else Toshinori really wants to say.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31213586

What Was Lost, What Was Almost Lost

A few days after Nighteye's death, All Might finally confronts Izuku about his offer to Mirio Togata.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30644654

Did You Really Not Know?

All Might and Izuku Midoriya decide that they are like father and son to each other early on in their relationship, at some point when they're training on the beach. Rather than just telling everyone that, though, they decide to mess with anyone who asks.

OR: 5 times Izuku and All Might don't admit to being father and son, and 1 time they do.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31511447

An Unfamiliar Feeling

Midoriya and All Might resume some of Midoriya's training at the beach, where they run into an unexpected visitor. The visitor makes Toshinori Yagi face an unfamiliar feeling, but not a bad one.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30325413

fit for the future fight

Little Satoshi Ando is Deku’s number one fan, no question about it. Satoshi loves heroes, even if his quirk won’t make him one, too. But when he gets to see Deku fight for the first time, an impossibly tall, thin blonde man challenges that in the best possible way.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30878669

Nothing Could Be More Worthwhile

A villain shows All Might a vision of Izuku. Bloodied. Broken. Fading. Was that some future that would come to pass? Toshinori needs to do everything in his power to make sure it isn't.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31862209

To Answer Your Question

Izuku Midoriya has spent years contemplating the gravity-defying nature of All Might's bangs. How in the world do they stay up like that? It may not be the most unbelievable thing about the pro hero, but it still defies all logic. So, when Izuku has the opportunity to study the real thing up close, he won't pass it up.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31754695

A Good Conversation

Izuku had been in his dorm room for hours, and no one knew why he wouldn’t come out. His friends and classmates tried to find out what was wrong, but with no luck.

Eventually, they realized that sometimes a kid just needs their dad.

Toshinori hadn't seen his boy for most of the day, so he didn't know what was wrong, either. But whether Izuku wanted to talk or not, Toshinori could be there for him now.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31909954

Can I Tell You A Secret?

Izuku is acting strangely after his surgery during the Sports Festival, and All Might is the first to notice. Turns out, it's just pain meds.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32797495

Hundreds of Things

Toshinori cursed the snow that fell in large, soft chunks outside. Most would call it beautiful. In another life, he would have called it beautiful, too. But now, his frail body couldn’t keep up with the chill.

Then, a cup of tea was placed in his hands.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34478146

BNHA Microfics

A series of micro fics or drabbles based on ask games. Each one contains a dose of Dadmight.

https://krisingtons.tumblr.com/tagged/bnha-microfic

Thanks for reading!

[authoressskr]

Tracking Death and Magic, pt 2

Characters: f!Reader [known in this fic as Duchess], Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Phil Coulson, Peter Parker, Bruce Banner, Sam Wilson, Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff, Pietro Maximoff, Clint Barton, Nick Fury, Maria Hill, mentions of Dr. Strange, OFCs

Warnings: Language, death, angst, and no Beta   ::    Notes: this was written for @captain-kelli’s #ckcomebacktour – WELCOME BACK!!    ::   Word Count: 10,414

Mythological + Fairy Tale Creatures AU feat. Alpha Werewolf/Vampire!Bucky, Alpha Werewolf/Vampire!Steve, Giant!Hulk side Bruce, Born Witch!Wanda, Hellhound mix!Reader

Someone is hunting down those with Fae blood in New York. And no one can figure out why or who is behind the crimes. So higher ups in the city hand the case over to SHIELD, who deals with the more difficult supernatural cases. But even after two weeks, this small elite team can’t seem to figure out where the person or persons responsible will strike or the reasoning behind it. Anyone with a drop of Fae blood is scared…scared of being kidnapped or killed. Time to call in some outside help.

Prompt: [*In Part 1*] “All of those people are alive right now - all because of her.”

[ Please do NOT repost, copy & paste, translate, post or share my works on any other platform without my EXPRESS WRITTEN PERMISSION. 18+ ONLY PLEASE, all content providers don’t want serious repercussions from underage interactions, myself included. ]

-+- REBLOGGING is fine and *very* appreciated! -+-

Part One

You could feel it as you walked up to the sidewalk where Cyrus had been killed. The now dried and cleaned sidewalk not hiding it’s dark shadows from you in the waning late afternoon light.

The creeping, underhanded power of the Seelie Court brushing against you.

The poison is a prominent smell to your hound side still since it’s only been a day and a half. Cyrus’s soul hasn’t lingered, so that at least is a blessing, but the conversation with your uncle and this fresh site is putting your nerves on the very edge. You can ‘see’ the faint magic outline where he died, you knew he’d be wearing his homemade medallion to ward off evil. Swallowing, you kneel where his feet would have been, reaching out with your magic.

The flashes that echo painfully through your mind make you gasp.

The cloaked figure is stealing magic. Taking it violently. To him, the more violent and quick, the better. It honestly just makes your stomach roll, the saliva building in your closed and clenched mouth.

But why? You can taste the lighter magic associated with the Seelie Court - the Court of Light - the kind that humans and others often think of when they think of the fair folk. The court thought, it doesn’t deal with humans or others unless absolutely needed…

When you told Hades you suspected a member of the higher courts on your little walk, you hadn’t anticipated to be able to feel it. The boots, the glistening silver swords, the escape when you had moved a forgotten tiny part of the sithen under the alley -- now it all makes a lot more sense now. The shiver that runs down your spine at the implications this creates. May the God and Goddess spare all those innocents involved, you pray quickly.

A henchman for the shining Seelie Court, sweet baby Jesus. What had you gotten yourself into?? What had SHIELD stumbled into??

The residual death is quick, but still it steals into you, taking away what little baited breath you had. Feeling the tears prickle your eyes as you try to figure out these new pieces of the puzzle.

Hades can’t help you - Gods can’t interfere with other pantheons businesses, good or bad.

Hades can’t save you from the other half of yourself.

It was something you had always known in the back of your mind, but the harsh slap of it hurt more than the death and falling pieces of this horrible plot. But...just maybe there could be a light in this cave of fae intrigue and murder. There are others whom you can save.

The three stolen wouldn’t be taken to the sithen, that would be too obvious of their involvement. Plus, they were fae and thus could leave as long as not put into a dungeon there and theoretically had enough power and know-how to do so. But had the cloaked figure been draining them, you weren’t sure if they could get out or away.

So, that would mean they were still somewhere close by.

The last traces of magic from the murder, Cyrus’s own traces, and your hellhound senses in overdrive to track everything - you’re drowning as the sun sinks just a tad lower in the sky, creating the beginnings of the lovely orange autumn color you adore. Fall was closer than you remembered. You can vaguely hear your name being said, like being underwater almost. Then you can smell sage, lemon and juniper - the sweet smells of the entrance to the Underworld.

The way the newcomer says your name grounds you, while Bucky calling your name brings you closer to the surface - your mate...Bucky brings you back to reality. And he’s protective and bristling slightly at the other man who is holding your arm’s firmly.

You’re looking up at the slightly blurry face of a traditionally handsome Greek man, all muscle and blurry smile, with thick black hair and sweet honey brown eyes.

“I hate your human disguise sometimes,” You grunt and turn to plop down on your ass as Bucky watches as the man lean in and proceed to lick from your chin up to your hairline. “Okay, okay...thank you Cerb,” You shove his chest gently to get him to release you, reaching for Bucky’s hand automatically. “This is my mate, Bucky. Don’t snap at him.” Cerberus gives you puppy dog eyes, his nerves calming down slightly to hold his form better. So at least now it was one face instead of the three blurry ones superimposed over each other.

“Did you just say Cerby?!” Wanda sounds astonished.

“As in Cerberus?” Natasha questions calmly. The guardian to the Underworld stands up and he’s visibly excited looking from you to Natasha and Wanda.

“Yes,” You coo. “This is my best friend in the whole world and Underworld, Cerberus. Cerberus, this is Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers is his best friend. Natasha Romanov, Clint Barton, Phil Coulson. Wanda Maximoff and her twin, Pietro.”

“Pleasure,” His deep voice almost has an echo to it. “Lord said you needed looking after, pup. He was right. Too close.”

“I know,” You sigh out as your hand subconsciously clenches Bucky’s a little tighter even after he helps you up.

“No,” Cerberus growls. “Close.”

“Fucking great,” You growl out in reply, anger rising.

“See anything?” Phil asks, forehead furrowed just so. You sigh again, anger dissipating as quickly as it had boiled up.

“We are in a shit ton of trouble.”

“We are aware of that, kid,” Steve states, crossing his arms over his wide chest.

“Nooo. Like real shit ton of trouble. Seelie Court trouble.” Phil lets out a string of curses as Clint’s stance gets more rigid. “The cloaked asshole is working for the Seelie Court. I can taste the residual light magic. And he’s stealing magic. That’s why he’s been killing most of them. Kidnapping the more powerful ones to drain them continuously, I’m guessing.”

“He can’t take them back to the golden sithen,” Phil states, following where you’re leading. “So they’re still in the area.”

“I think he took them where there’s more greenery and nature, it would make it more comfortable for him. Someplace secretive to drain and hide them.”

“Central Park,” Bucky reasons. “It makes the most sense. It would be easy for him to hide them there, especially if he was -” He stops as you start exhibiting nervous energy beside him, enough to upset his wolf and your scent to change. “What is it?”

“Only royalty can move the sithen,” You whisper, eyes focused solely on Phil.

“I have to let Fury know…” Phil looks at you with pity and sadness appearing in his blue eyes. “Everything.”

“I figured as much when I tasted their magic,” face contorting with a pained expression is all Bucky sees on your lovely face as you whisper the words defeatedly. He’s on edge now with your changing emotions and scents, trying to keep his eyes from shifting too much or his fangs popping out to prepare for the impending fight, the need to protect and soothe you almost overwhelming him internally.

“I’m sorry,” He offers, moving forward to squeeze your shoulder sympathetically, withdrawing the phone from his pant pocket as your free hand shoots forward to grip his wrist tightly, a plea written plainly for all to see on your almost panicking face.

“Please Phil...delay it til the morning. I can’t...they’ll -” Bucky and Steve can taste the fear that’s rolling off you now, raising his hackles as Cerberus eyes him with interest before returning his gaze to Duchess.

“I won’t let your other side harm you,” Cerby snarls, his handsome olive face contorted with anger as you wince hard. Bucky tugs you into him as much as he can with your iron grip still on Phil, soothing the pacing and snarling wolf in his head as much as he is soothing you.

That’s why you said you should be better at wording things, Bucky thinks to himself, nuzzling his nose into your hair, fangs no longer a worry as your scent shifts yet again to worry. Only now he realizes you are concerned about how he sees you.

“Do you care I’m a werewolf and vampire crossbreed 100 year old plus former assassin?” Bucky mumbles softly against your head, making you pull away to look up at him, shock and confusion making you wrinkle your forehead at your mate. Your scent shifts to calm Bucky now, eyes tearing up just a tad as his wolf shakes and settles down. Mate needs reassurance.

“No!” You release Phil’s wrist to cup Bucky’s cheek, thumb moving over the course hairs of his beard. “I don’t care what you are. You’re mine, James.” The light in Bucky’s eyes stun you with his smile, his eyes crinkling beautifully. Just radiating his happiness in that simple little motion of his elated smile, your inner hound almost dopey at the tenderness your mate is exuding.

“Then why would I care if you're half fae?” He presses his forehead down against yours, making you squeeze your eyes closed to prevent the tears from falling. “You’re my mate, Duchess. I don’t care what you are, as long as I get to keep you. Understand, doll?”

“I just don’t want to be known as one of them...as one of the Shining Court. That’s not me.” You keep your eyes squeezed close, taking comfort in your mate’s touch and his surrounding scent, blocking out everything but Bucky.

“You moving that fast with that sword was hot though,” Bucky rumbles out, making laughter just peel out of you, opening your eyes to be met with those intensive cerulean orbs.

“You’re too good,” You copy his statement from the closet earlier, smiling up at the most important person in your life.

But that comment does make you think, yanking your forehead away from Bucky to snap back to Coulson.

“Phil! It’s for my father!”

“You sure?”

“It has to be! Only royalty can move the sithen! The High Prince has probably a quarter of the fae power I do and his son probably barely enough to magically open a doorway in the sithen.”

“Wait,” Clint starts, twirling a toothpick between his front teeth before pointing it at you and continuing. “So you’re a fae princess?!”

You wince again, Bucky’s metal fingers slipping under the edge of your shirt bottom to stroke your skin to ease the emotions swirling in and around you - at least they are much more in control and subdued than minutes ago. “Technically, yes.” You admit in a defeated whisper. “My grandmother is the Queen of the Seelie Court.”

“Which is why Peter said you were ordering the cloaked man to answer you,” Steve states, rolling his shoulders to relieve some tension. Too late you realize that since Steve and Bucky are actually pack that he was getting some diluted effects of your emotional rollercoaster just now just by being so close to the two of you. ‘Sorry,’ You mouth to him as he gives you a soft smile in return.

“So that’s why the ground shook?” Bucky asked, forehead slightly furrowed at Phil then down to you. “How can you move the whole sithen?”

“Oh, I can’t. I couldn’t do that unless I was Queen and would need a whole lot of blood magic to back it up to move it. And honestly, the sithen is a living thing, so it would need to be...um...convinced. But moving pieces of it - especially forgotten or ‘dead’ spaces that the court don’t access - is fairly easy if you know what you are doing. Hades is Lord of the Underworld. Is the “Underworld” just under Greece? No. It’s everywhere AND a specific place. The same properties apply to the sithen,” You shrug as if it hasn’t really occurred to you the schematics of it all.

“Ahh, sort of like the Sanctum Sanctorum of Dr. Strange’s,” Pietro supplies, tapping a finger against his chin with a small grin.

“Yes and no.”

“I was thinking more like the jet,” Wanda supplies to her twin who frowns at her.

“So if Dr. Strange had a Sanctum Sanctorum jet?”

“Jesus. Christ.” Coulson and Natasha mutter loudly in sync, sighing and turning away slightly from the twins and Clint who is nodding along with their continued discussion.

“So could you find the piece of the sithen in Central Park?” Steve moves the conversation back to the kidnapped victims, you watching him unclench and clench his right hand slightly. You move a little more into Bucky and reach for Steve’s right hand. His head snaps over to you almost comically fast, while you just try to exude a calming energy. Bucky whispers a soft ‘thank you’ against your temple before gently reaching over to squeeze Steve’s shoulder. You can almost feel Steve’s blood pressure drop once both you and Bucky are calm and now working on calming him.

“Yeah, I could. I’ve scented the magic signature he’s used both attacking me and at the crime scenes, so shouldn’t be too hard to locate it. I mean, I won’t be exactly spot on, but will be close enough to be able to move the sithen bit to me and manipulate it open hopefully.”

“So that’s the play,” Natasha states as Phil whips out his cell, causing another spike in anxiety to roll through you, but Bucky and Steve both quickly whisk it away with their touch.

“Yes, sir,” Phil states evenly. “We may have located the kidnapped parties. I request a team to subtly clear and surround Central Park. Yes, sir.” His right eyelid gives one lone twitch. “Yes, all Avengers to the Park. We are dealing with Seelie Court involved matters. Yes, she is here and will be leading us to the kidnapped hostages. Affirmative. Will do, sir.” He hangs up to find everyone staring at him. “Tony will be bringing everyone’s gear and then we’ll head to Central Park. If you have any requests or needs, please bother Stark. I have a whole ops to coordinate.” A black suv pulls up behind him, which no one even flinches at. “I’ll meet you all in an hour. Stark will know the location.”

“Onward to probable death!” Pietro mutters with fake enthusiasm and you frown at him, Cerberus moving closer to you until his arm is brushing. The scent of sage, juniper and lemon - overlapped with the scent of coffee, cinnamon, cedar and a soft ocean breeze, things distinctly Bucky to you, even the scent of orange faintly coming from Steve - do nothing to help the pit in your belly.

How true, you muse morbidly, glancing up into sad honey brown eyes. You can both catch the faint, trace smell of death.

And you both know it’s from you.

-----*****-----*****-----

Tony had brought you several SHIELD jumpsuits in various colors: gray, blue and black, smirking as you had raised an eyebrow at him. “Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously, little hellhound. They’ll all form to fit you. Bucky and Peter mentioned swords, so I brought some thigh holsters as well as a back holster, since I didn’t know the length of your swords. Natasha has extra guns aboard the jet if you are into that. Also, we don’t have time for you two to be frisky, so -”

“Shut up, Tony,” Bucky had growled from behind him, just making Tony smile wider. Seeing Bucky in his hero suit was a whole different sexy than last night and this morning. Well, you now understood why Tony was having concerns about you two because - dear gods did you want Bucky to bend you over something and take you with that suit on. You’d be equally happy to just drop to your knees and thank your mate for this look. Bucky obviously can see and sense the changes as you are basically drooling and clenching your thighs, while having an iron grip on the dark blue suit you had been favoring.

“Remember!” Tony says loudly while shaking a finger at you before Steve comes up beside Bucky and herds the grinning man from the room where you’re surrounded by suits and weapons.

“Eyes are glowing again, doll,” Bucky purrs as he comes to a halt before you.

“Can’t help it, it’s an emotional reaction most of the time,” You breath out, a smile playing on the corner of his lips at your answer. “Used to just do it when I was extremely pissed off. Now apparently it decides to pop up whenever I’m -”

“Horny?”

“Focusing. On. My. Mate.” You insist as he rumbles out a laugh, bending forward to kiss your forehead sweetly. You tilt your head up to catch his eye again, giving him a small smile as you reach out to take his flesh hand. “But just FYI, I can smell you’re horny too. And them pants is tiiight.” He captures your lips in a searing kiss, pulling you so tight against his chest that the buckles dig into you a little, just making you all the more riled up.

“Mate,” Bucky’s voice is part plea and warning in it’s roughness after you two pull apart, you nosing along his throat, kissing the skin where your mark should adorn.

“You could leave to let me get dressed…?”

“Where the hell is the fun in that, doll? Huh?” Both of you are chuckling, touching each other as much as possible but struggling to keep it PG.

“Bucky, I know you don’t want to bring this up…”

 “Don’t.” 

“But this could be it, ya know? So I need you to sort of brace yourself if it does.” His back is now ramrod straight and his jaw clenched tight, but holding your gaze.

“I won’t let it happen.” The determination from your first meeting is back, but you can only muster the softest look in reply, letting the suit fall to the ground as you cup his face with both hands.

“Sweetheart,” You coo gently, watching the sadness dance in his eyes that he’s trying hard to hide. “I adore you. I trust you inexplicably. I would happily spend the rest of my life with you. To mate you, to marry you...to have a little baby that looks just like you, that’s all I want. You deserve some peace and so. much. love.” His hands are gripping tight onto your waist, you can feel the fingertips digging in as you continue. “But you know I’m marked for death, Bucky. They’ve tried most of my life to circumvent it, stop it, undo it. But death comes for me regardless. I need you to not pull away from everyone if that happens. You’ll need them. Please.”

“I don’t - I don’t want to deal with that. I can’t. I can’t lose you too. I said I would protect you and keep you safe. I’m no Alpha if I don’t try. I’m no mate if I don’t try.” You’re at a standstill, both now in emotional turmoil over this topic, trying not to let it bleed into the other. He presses his forehead against yours hard, staring into each other’s eyes. “I love you,” He whispers and it’s all you ever wanted to hear. Right now, you had all wanted right here - a wonderful mate who loved you and would try to move heaven and earth for you, who didn’t care what you were. One of the most beautiful men in the whole world who looked at you like the sun rose and set by your whim. The whole thing was unfathomable.

“I love you, Bucky,” You breathe out in reply, longing for any other outcome but the one you know is coming. “And I will love you as long as you live.” Bucky makes a noise in the back of his throat, a couple tears sliding down his cheeks as yours begin to fall freely, letting him wrap his arms so securely around you as his beautiful blue jacket absorbs your quiet sobs.

-----*****-----*****-----

The sun is nearly set, the sky streaked a hundred hues of dark pink and red as New York slowly descends into darkness.

Bucky is standing right beside you, outfit bringing out his eyes as he surveys the scene stoically. You’d chosen the dark blue jumpsuit to match his, arms brushing subtly as you stand just outside the magic lines - and sight lines from the sithen - of Central Park.

Although you can’t see them, you can vaguely sense the score of SHIELD agents and Avengers scattered on the edges of the treelines. But you can ‘see’ the edge of the piece of sithen just shy of the Azalea Pond at the center of the Ramble. Bucky had been the one with his tablet naming things off to you - you had only moved to New York two years ago after all - trying to help you narrow down areas where it could have been. You wish you had had the time for him to show you around New York, around Brooklyn, and places that still stood from when he was younger.

Cerberus is on the other side of the pond, should the cloaked figure try to escape, swathed in the grip of Underworld magic to keep him invisible and thus much more easy to herd or pounce.

Wanda is piggybacking off your abilities, twined with yours temporarily so she could sense the heartbeats of the victims now that you had a location. Sam is in the trees to the left of the pond with Peter, Steve and Tony on the right while Clint, Natasha and Pietro cut off any other possible exit points. Bruce is staying by the ambulances, ready to Hulk out should the need arise, although you could tell from his face he was radiating the bright hope it absolutely would not.

Any way the cloaked figure ran, he’d be funneled where the Avengers chose. There would be no escape. As a failsafe, Pietro would be the only one to engage with him except you, since he would be the most able to take him on with the fae speed.

You drag yourself back to reality, turning to gaze over at Bucky and steeling yourself with one last deep breath before starting down the short path to the Azalea Pond.

“Be safe for me, doll,” Bucky says softly, almost as soft as the small breeze suddenly around you two. You manage to nod, throat closing up again. The fair folk do not lie. It had been beaten into you, quite literally, when you were little at court. You want nothing more than to lie to Bucky in that moment. To reassure him you will be safe for him. But the fair folk do not lie.

Good thing you are not solely fair folk. You reach for his hand, grasping just his flesh fingertips in your grip and squeezing them hard. It’s a millisecond in time, but it seems like one of those Lord of the Rings moments that are in that slow, dramatic, longing-filled motion. “I’ll do my best, handsome.” Dropping his hand before you lose your resolve, you take the barely visible path towards the pond. Your magic is swirling with Wanda’s, your senses all in overdrive - so much so you can’t even register the smell of the flowers blooming along the landmark.

Pursing your lips, you whistle a simple five note tune that fae had used for time beyond memory.

From behind you comes that deep, craggly voice, “Greetings, highness.”

“Greetings, servant,” He gives a little hiss at the title you bestow. “SHIELD has sent me to inform you that if you cooperate, you will not be sentenced to death.”

“They are mostly human. I do not fear the humans.”

“You are not wise to not fear them,” You give a pregnant pause, making sure you give that haughty look the court loves to disperse. “If you do not accept this offer, I am to inform you that I, Princess Duchess Propolos Hekatos, will be judge, jury and - if need be - executioner.” He pushes back his cloak hood back, allowing you to finally see his scaled face. He was probably one of very few left over of those lizard scaled dwarves who stayed closer to the caverns around lakes and seas when humans first emerged as semi-civilized, with beautiful almost translucent rainbow sheened scales around his eyes and cheeks, his mouth set in a thin line with no lips.

“I was damned from the get go, princess.”

“We are only as we choose to be - it doesn’t have to be that way,” You insist, leaning a little forward, softening your eyes. Even if you disliked court life, the snobs of court who’s magic had begun to dwindle long before you were born, and how you were treated there - he was the same as you; a discarded fae. He doesn’t reply, though there is a flicker of something in his eyes, simply just unsheathes his double swords and gestures to you with his chin.

“Prepare, half breed,” Although his insult has less venom than the alley last night, you huff out a sigh at his tone. Like he’s just going through the motions. Asshat.

You shift your feet just so, straightening your spine as you wait for his move. Physically you are in that moment, but your power shifts the sithen opening to the side where Steve and Tony are waiting, causing the cloaked man to hiss, baring slightly sharpened front teeth at you. “Little bitch!” And his steel meets yours. “We will both die for this!” He snarls as he tries to drive you back towards the trees and brush opposite the pond, you holding the line as you wait for Wanda to signal you that the people had been recovered.

“I’ll deal with them when the time comes,” You growl low, blocking his blades yet again with a heavy clink, shifting just so that you can reach for Bucky’s favorite knife at the small of your back, tinged with the poison that your cloaked friend had been favoring and stabbing it into his side and piercing his lung with a squelch.

“The poison will do nothing to me,” He spits at you as you twirl your wrist to disarm him of one of the swords and slide Bucky’s knife back into its sheath.

“It will now. Dr Banner mixed it with another, a heavy iron involved one - infused with belladonna - to make you human slow,” You lean in as you block another wide swing from him with the one sword left, smiling wide. “And heal human slow.” The whole of Central Park shakes as you show your hand.

“No! NO!” He screams and hisses, attempting to swing his meaty fists at you now that he was without a weapon.

“I am still my grandmother’s first born grandchild. I am still the High Prince’s first born. I am a Princess of the Seelie High Court.” You lean in as your tone becomes more malicious with each word, watching true fear alight in his mossy green eyes. “And with all the inbreeding and decline for the last century,” You straighten up, your blue flames engulfing you as he attempts to scurry away from you, shielding his eyes against the light you emanate as he falls on his ass in the dense brush and dirt. “Let’s face it - I am probably the most powerful fae aside from the Queen of the Seelie and the King of the Unseelie.” Leaning down, fisting your hand in his cloak, you yank him back upright, snarling as your power dances behind your eyes, careful still to at least to not burn him with your flames. But watching him flinch at the heat, the basic fear all animals have towards a large flame, sets you more alight at the taste of that fear. “And absolutely the wrong person to piss off!”

“Spare me! Please!!” He screams, more high pitched than you had imagined, nearly making you wince as you see the red sparks above the tree line and see a blue clad shadow moving along the treeline coming closer to you. Pietro blurs past you, slapping old iron cuffs on the cloaked man, which sends him quite literally howling and screeching from the burn of the metal. 

Your flames give off a few large flickers before they begin to die down when Pietro says that they’ve gotten the kidnapped people to the ambulance they had on stand by, Bucky coming down the path towards you with a small smile on his lips as your eyes meet. Your magic shrinks back towards you, the weight of all the magic and your now overworked abilities settling back into you, your shoulders sagging a little with relief. It wasn’t over, but once your grandmother learned about your father and half-brother then she would be the one to end it.

The look in his cobalt eyes shift quickly, widening and moving to glare directly over your shoulder, his mouth moving in slow motion as he begins to barrel towards you, you begin to turn - only to feel the jerk of your body going forward instead. A glance downward shows a shiny red tip of one of the cloaked man’s swords protruding from just under your breasts, when you hear the mournful howl echo in and around your ears - only to realize it’s three distinct howls. The tang of blood spills into your mouth in a surprised gasp, turning slightly to see who has murdered you.

Your half brother’s hand is shaking slightly as he backs away from you, surprise written on both your faces as the scent of death finally fully fills your nose.

“I never thought -” You wheeze out, taking a few shaky steps towards your half-sibling as Bucky slides to a stop before you, his boots kicking up the fallen green leaves on the grass, both hands grasping your hips firmly as his eyes wander all over your body and face, tears already tracking down his cheeks. “You would have the balls!” You finish with another wheeze, the metallic taste much stronger now.

Bucky turns you to face him as Tony and Peter keep your half-brother from escaping, the darkening greenery of the world around you narrowing down to just Bucky. It’s a beautiful world to be relegated to actually.

“No. NO. Come on, doll. You - you gotta stay with me.” His voice is raw sounding, like he’s trying to not be loud, his metal hand putting pressure on the front wound as if it would help. His forehead is shoved against yours, your entire gaze narrowed to his blue eyes and his damp cheeks as he pulls you into his lap, collapsing the both of you to the ground. It’s funny almost to you in the moment...like you can still hear his loud, pitiful howl like a haunting melody behind everything he’s saying. “Doll, you gotta...come on, gotta fight. I need you to fight. Cerberus, he - he went to get Hades and Hecate. They’ll fix it. Just hold on til they get here, okay?”

“I love you soo much, James Buchanan Barnes,” You’re heartbroken to watch him see your bloody bottom lip tremble, and the color seeping from your face. You can see him weighing all his options through his tears, trying to move your tired hand up to touch him, to comfort him.

“I love you too, babydoll, but please God, please … just stay with me.” The choked up sound of his voice makes you want to cry for causing him this pain. No amount of forewarning could have prepared you for this feeling - the feeling of slowly breaking and killing your mate.

“Mate,” is the last thing you manage to get out before you just go limp in his arms, those jewel eyes he loves so much already just staring up at the first stars twinkling in the sky unseeing. In the back of his mind, his vampire side offers up the idea which he swore to God he would never do. But all too late.

The howl that rips from his throat is pure misery and heartache, his body bowed over his mate’s, his grip still holding her in a vice. The blood cloys her scent, furthering his heartbreak.

He looks up, needing Steve on a near visceral level, only to not see anyone at all. Confusion slightly mars his grief, looking over his shoulder and all around the darkened area, but met with no familiar faces or words in his comms. Confusion gives way to his war training, the alertness on it’s highest notch as he scans around, sniffing delicately at the air as the world seems much darker now than it had just been. When he turns back towards the pond, on edge at the very tampered down scents surrounding him, he spots three almost identical women standing there with those dark pink azaleas framing behind them almost like a fresco - just appearing as if from nowhere like Hades had earlier on the street.

“James Barnes,” The one on the left begins, long dark brown hair falling freely to her waist. “We are sorry for your loss,” the one on the right continues, her hair half up in intricate braids. “But now that we have fulfilled our ill-spoken creed,” the middle speaks, all that dark mahogany hair piled atop her hair like a crown, before they all join hands as the hairs on the back of his neck and arms stand to attention at the sudden surge of power that surrounds him, his arms tensing as a wave of azalea scent blows around the two of them, bringing Duchess as close to him as possible again. “We will return our little cousin back to you.”

His mouth goes dry, forehead wrinkled in not understanding as he looks down at his mate, her eyes still open and her skin still dampened with that death pallor. Bucky gently uses his metal digits to close her eyelids, grief and nausea rolling through him simultaneously while the ground beside Bucky gives a small shake and splits open, Hades climbing so elegantly and easily from the ground below with Cerberus - in three-headed giant black dog form - with a wispy blue thing dangling from the middle head’s mouth. There isn’t even enough room left in him to be shocked, there is just acceptance of whatever this shit show was.

“Turns out, sometimes you just have to accept Fate and go through it in order to stop it,” Hades murmurs in his deep molasses voice, bending down just so, his long fingers gripping the back of Bucky’s neck loosely. “Will you accept your fate now, Bucky?”

“I’ll do anything for her,” Bucky rasps out with conviction shining in his tear-riddled eyes.

“Splendid,” Hades motions with his free hand for Cerberus to come forward. “You must take a mouthful of this first.” He orders sternly as a beautiful blonde woman, shorter than Duchess and with a more heavy hourglass shape, emerges from the crevice to the Underworld with a black and golden chalice. Bucky marvels at the tiny wild roses popping up in her wake as she walks around Cerberus to stand between himself and Hades. She sniffles as she looks at Duchess, one hand leaving the chalice as she frowns over at the Fates before brushing two fingers down his left cheek to his chin, the warmth from just her fingers seeping quickly into his icy feeling skin. He doesn’t even notice the Fates disappearing just after that, he’s so focused on the goddess before him.

“Remove the sword, Hades.” It’s gone with a wave at the woman’s order, Bucky unconsciously tightening his hold once again on his mate. “Now, Bucky, sweet little honeysuckle boy, take a mouthful of this - but don’t swallow.” She brings the cup to his lips and tips it up. “Now, when Cerberus drops her soul back into her body, kiss her and push all the ambrosia into her mouth. It’ll take a few seconds for her soul to readjust and the ambrosia to heal her before she comes back to consciousness, okay honeysuckle?” Bucky manages a jerky nod, rewarded with a pat to his cheek before she backs up towards Hades, Cerberus giving a huff as he leans down towards Duchess’s body.

“Three. Two. One.” Hades counts down, Cerberus’s light brown eyes locked onto Bucky’s before the middle head gently opens it’s very large jaw and the blue wisp floats down to her body. “Now.” Bucky smashes his lips against hers, feeding the liquid into her mouth with an edge of desperation barely restrained within him.

“Now we wa-” A gasp startles you all, her jewel-toned eyes blinking rapidly as her hands claw at Bucky’s waist where they’re trapped between them, until they’re focused on Bucky. Bucky lets loose a sob as she smiles up at him, blood now gone from her face.

“Hi handsome,” A tiny little cough to clear her throat. “Bucky,” Duchess manages to rasp out before she’s crushed to Bucky’s chest.

“I lost you,” Bucky half gasps/half sobs into her hair, the scent of blood seemingly long gone, a terrible dream from which he can now finally awaken...it was just her again. Just his mate.

“But you found me, handsome.”

Bucky manages to get out a soft chuckle as he pulls back to cup her face in his hands. “You do anything like that again, doll, and I swear I’ll -” She cuts him off with a kiss but he doesn’t miss the smile and silent eyeroll. When they break apart, she brings her hand up to cup his cheek, rubbing her thumb over his cheekbone repeatedly as Bucky just reveals in the warmth of her fingers and palms against his skin.

“You are mine,” She whispers so damn gently, like a breath of life gently fanning over his lips as her forehead bumps against his softly. Bucky understood this was her sign that everything was alright, that closeness of foreheads pressed together and reading every emotion in each other's eyes. 

“And you are mine,” Bucky affirms, electricity buzzing down his spine before he smiles wide at his mate, happy to see her own smile widen as he does so. “You’re stuck with me for forever now.” She tries to feign a disappointed look and tone, to school her eyes and keep her lips from twitching up in a grin is poorly executed.

“Oh, no. What a terrible thing, Sarge,” It comes out more as a purr, lighting a warmth and fire from within Bucky, elation now bleeding as a scent out of him at this tiny but monumental moment with his mate. A deep voice clearing his throat behind you brings you both a bit back more to the present, Bucky glancing to the left as your smile stays gracing your gorgeous face.

“Welcome back!” The goddess burst out, tears opening flowing down her lovely and soft olive oval face, falling to her knees behind Duchess and throwing her arms around her shoulders, squeezing her fiercely. She even pulls Bucky closer, smoothing a hand up and down his back as she hugs both of them just this side of painful.

“Thank you, theía.” Duchess grunts out from the tight sandwich she’s in, looking over to her uncle. “Theíos, what happened to that little motherfucker?”

Hades stern looking face breaks out in a tiny smile, looking so kindly down at the scene before him as Cerberus’s three heads lap and nuzzle at the three on ground. “He’s still being held on the other plane. And speaking of which, we should return quickly. Hecate might actually kill him and start a bigger conflict than which we already have on our hands.”

“Well that answers some of my questions,” Bucky mutters just behind her right ear, nipping at the earlobe gently as Persephone releases you all, gently wiping away her tears.

“I’ll fill you in as best I can later. After someone fills me in, that is,” Duchess promises with a quick but warm kiss to his lips. Hades helps his wife up, kissing both of her palms and exchanging a long, loving look before extending his hand for Duchess, Bucky shooting up beside her as they each have a hand hold on her and help to steady her as she sways just a touch.

“Much later,” Bucky agrees with the barest hint of a nod, just needing to soothe his mate still. Frankly, just needing to reconnect and optimally be alone with his mate. Hopefully uninterrupted for at least two weeks, a month - two months would be absolutely dreamy and very, very far fetched with all the shit they’ll have to deal with afterwards regarding this case. But Bucky would move whole cities to make good on what she’d said to him aboard the jet too. Finally get him some of that apple pie life that he, Steve and the Commandos had talked about all those years and years ago.

He watches as you roll your neck, gently pushing away one of Cerby’s heads to shake both your arms out before reaching up to finally scratch at each of Cerberus’s heads one by one, kissing at their muzzles with gusto as the giant hellhound wiggles it’s butt with abandon. “I didn’t get that warm of a welcome,” Bucky remarks with a smirk, his mouth breaking into a wider smile at the look she shoots him.

“Because that is something personal you’ll get later on, Sarge,” 

“Geallaidhean, an dannsair beag agam,” Bucky growls softly, making sure to seal it with a deep, hard kiss. Promises, my little dancer. She looks a little flustered when they break apart, eyes not as focused as before. He knows she can smell the very pleased scent rolling off of him at her reaction.

“Such an Alpha,” She mutters with a teasing eye roll, keeping her hand on his chest. “You wear that jacket and you can have whatever you like,” comes the whisper against his lips, a soft growl punctuating the end before he takes another kiss. “Okay. Okay. Now, let’s go shank the little fairy prince,” Baring your teeth is more cute to Bucky than terrifying initially, but knowing what you’re capable of does make it scarier. And sexier, he wasn’t going to lie to himself. He loves that his mate is that intimidating.

And quite honestly, what will be more scary to the little prince than someone he feared and loathed coming back after watching them die? What's more, coming back for their retribution on him from the other side. Bucky can bet anyone that it’s not a hell of a lot actually.

“Brace yourself for it,” She whispers, hand wrapping tight around his metal one. Bucky feels a tug at his navel as the whole world around him seems to lighten at least ten shades, the overwhelming scent of blood returning, along with the pond waters, and Steve suddenly all fill his nose at once, Steve’s hands suddenly wrapping just this side of painful on his upper arms.

The scent of confusion and awe fill the area around them like a sudden breeze, the fair folk Prince calling for the God and Goddess to protect him in a whisper which might as well be a shout in the eerily quiet park. It seemed like even the regular wildlife noises in the Park had shown restraint, watching the otherworldly conflict in reverence.

“Did you miss me, brother?” No one on the other side of Manhattan could mistake the venom in her voice for anything other than deadly.

“You don’t understand!” The man - if you could call him that, no one in Central Park would though - shouts defiantly with a slice of whining at the end, his pupils blown as his eyes dart around the small clearing with barely restrained panic, nearly everywhere but on Duchess.

“Spare me your bullshit, Bradye,” Duchess growls, the lights beginning to dance behind her eyes as she moves closer to him, leaving her mate behind her. She smiles a bit triumphantly, maliciously. “You have come into this realm and by doing so are now subject to its rules and punishments. That useless title you hold will do you no good.” A few tsks come from her, “For you will face a death punishment either way. Hecate has requested the Queen come here and you and our father will pay for, let’s see, eight deaths and three kidnappings.”

“The fair folk do not lie,” He reminds in a taunt, thinking he’s won something. Her dangerous smile makes his millisecond of gloating worthless.

“Oh, of that I am well aware. I was schooled in that rule with leather. And steel. And sharp blows...and I think it may have slipped your mind, but I DID die. Charon saw me waiting upon the shore of the River Styxx. And he cannot lie about the souls he sees and ferries. Is the shaking of your hand as you drove your servant’s blade into my chest so quickly forgotten? Don’t worry,” Flames begin to gather around her ankles, slowly creeping upward like a nonsensical dance. “I have worked with SHIELD to document all you and our father have done. Did you know that there are some cameras opposite where your servant was seen entering and exiting? And that it has files that date back to before the first murder? Where you can make out two male figures walking into the park and it has a slight shake to it? Almost like an earthquake...or perhaps even a sithen moving…” The color drains from his already pasty face as Duchess strides closer, the blue and white flames now licking up her hips and lower back. There is a slight odor of urine, making Steve and Bucky both wrinkle their noses as Tony takes a small step away from him.

It’s a power move, not just the ever shifting flames but Bucky can clearly spot how sharp her teeth have grown, how her midnight blue fingernails are now black pointed tips. She’s allowing her fae side out as well, those multicolored lights bobbing and dancing behind her irises as each step she takes results in tiny little faerie rings, the tiny flowers blooming in the colors of the pinks, greens, and light blues that dance behind her eyes as small little beings descend from the trees and pixie-looking fae flit from the flowers around the Azalea Pond.

“You have no proof,” The haughtiness returns, looking down at Duchess, and had his voice not shook, might have pulled it off. He also eyes the fae joining the group in the clearing around the pond, his eyes catching sight of the faerie rings behind her and the shock that shows in his eyes is nearly equal to watching her appear back on this plane - alive.

“You hear that, Grandmother? Everything I asked Hecate’s handmaidens to give you is not proof.”

Bucky will remember that look forever. The snapping up of his head so fast it looked like it hurt, the look of complete and utter stunned surprise that seems to echo through and around him and actually make a tremor run through the little slimeball as Fury, Coulson and a lovely looking older woman with hair that went from silver at the top of her head and slowly gained a darker red as it came to rest at her waist came behind him into the clearing.

“I have heard all in this park. I have watched your hand slay your sister.” There is a flash of fury in her eyes, which Bucky notices are mismatched. One green as freshly mowed grass and the other a dark pine bark brown. “And had she not been preoccupied with keeping everyone in this park safe, sealing the sithen closed, and focused on her mate, you wouldn’t have stood a chance, you preposterous, moronic, useless child!” Her voice raises but her face never changes from an indifferent look that Bucky had seen Queen Elizabeth sport more than a few times on tv. “You and your father will be punished to the fullest extent of this plane’s laws. Before that you both will be brought before both courts of Fae and stripped of all your titles, rights, magic -” She looks down her nose at him with a sniff of disdain, “This applies more to your father as he actually has abilities. And you will also be made to pay for restitution to the families of those you had killed and of course those three whom you stole magic from and tortured. By our laws and the old ways, your sister has death rights on all three of you involved. And I must say, if I was her, I would drag your punishments out slowly...meticulously...painfully.”

Duchess strides back over to Bucky, hands already reaching out for him as the fire dies down around her - not as consuming, but still a bright warmth that shadows her entirety. Wrapped safely in his arms, Bucky rests his chin on the top of her head as Steve gently brushes his hand up and down her arm a few times, just reassuring her of their pack bond before taking a small step back to let them bond more. She pulls back a little from the comfort of his arms, tilting her head back to look up at him, Bucky knowing exactly what she wants. This was all very familiar to what happened just before she died...and honestly they all need that reassurance that everything is okay still. And this is the simplest and best way he can do it now; Her lips are soft and easily molded to his own. His sensitive ears can still pick up the little chirps and flitter sounds of small wings of the tiny fae that had climbed into this plane at Duchess’s silent command, gathered closer to her than her Grandmother, waiting for something else it seems.

A sharp featured man dressed in a black suit jacket with heavy, shining gold threaded designs along the wrists, collar, and lapels comes into the clearing with two men trailing behind him dragging a third between them.

The tiny beings begin a high pitched whine as the dragged man is thrown at the Faerie Queen’s feet. The man in black eyeing the tiny creatures with an unreadable something in his eyes.

Bucky is shocked at how much Duchess shares her face shape and nose with her father. Everything else must have come from her mother, making her features softer. Her eye color - she had told him last night - had come from her mother’s father, her mother’s side also responsible for her more soft Greek eye shape and supple body as well. Her father’s face however is harsher, more weathered looking than even his mother’s face. His eyes are a muddy brown and he looks to be maybe an inch or so taller than Duchess herself, unusual for a male - and even most women - of high Fae blood to be that short and not claim Brownie or Goblin blood, both of which a high Fae would absolutely loathe to admit to tainting their line. Him and his son seem to have been the tailings of a long and powerful bloodline, while Duchess was an anomaly of both sides of her family tree which was probably why she was so powerful. She was seemingly that red-headed gene in a sea of black hair which came about once every few generations.

Steve moves closer to the two of them again as the Queen looks down at her son with even more disgust than her grandson, which Bucky would not have thought possible a second ago. The sharp featured man comes to stand before Duchess and gives a deep nod, the two men behind him taking a knee as they come to a stop, the High Prince of the Seelie Court and his son watching from behind the Queen with shock and anger mixed on both their faces.

“Your highness, we at the Unseelie Court are thankful to you as it was a forgotten part of our court that was taken.” His bright green eyes look almost hesitant for his next words. “We are indebted to you for clearing this up. And also for clearing our court of involvement. The Unseelie Court is indebted to you, Princess Duchess Propolos Hekatos.”

Duchess pulls away a little from Bucky and Steve to sink into a deep curtsy, “Thank you, King Odhran. May your debt be cleared swiftly.” The two men behind him rise and they all go over to the Seelie Queen as Duchess’s flames die down further, pulsing softly in time with soft flutters and swayings of the tiny fae that have moved closer still.

“I will be seeing you later for their merited punishments, cousin,” The man says indifferently while also containing a hint of malice.

“Good evening until then, Odhran.” He and his men disappear as the Queen waves her hand to the men and women holding the prisoners formerly known as her family. “Fury. Coulson. We will be off now. They will be put into your custody in a week’s time. My granddaughter will, of course, be there for the handoff as a representative of the good will of my court.” Bucky doesn’t like that she’s ordering Duchess, fighting to suppress a growl. Does she not know he has plans for his mate?? She turns to address said granddaughter. “You will attend this handoff as a Princess of the Seelie Court. Come see me the morning before the handoff, as we have things we need to discuss. Please thank your goddess, Hecate, again for her swift actions and Hades for his too.” Duchess sinks into that deep curtsy once again before nodding at the trees and pond, the tiny creatures melting back into the waters and darkening branches like shadows, her Grandmother watching with something close to fondness on her face as the guards and prisoners disappear first, then her elegant frame takes a few steps and is gone as fast and quietly as the others.

Fury holds his hand straight up in the air after they vanish, no one making a move, just light breathing as everyone glances around the clearing, looking at Duchess and then Coulson who both give a firm nod before he lowers his hand and clears his throat. Fury’s good eye looks tired as fuck to Bucky.

“Alright people, shit shows over. Wanda, please begin magically cleansing this spot with Pietro, I want to be out of here in under an hour. Coulson, get me updates and signed paperwork from the three rescued for prosecution. Tony and Vision, keep the area contained until after the cleansing. SHIELD agents, please collect photos and evidence before the cleansing. Originals we keep, copies to the NYPD. Falcon and Spidey, back on patrols for the next few hours. Barnes and Rogers, take the lady home. I think she’s done and had enough for tonight. Everyone else, find something to do to make this go as fast as goddamn possible.”

“Roger, roger!” Bucky and Steve call out, Bucky tossing his flesh arm over her shoulder, Steve on his left side as they all wave silently to their friends and begin their way out of Central Park.

“This is one of the most terrible evenings of my life,” Steve mutters as Hades, Cerberus - in his human form - and a third figure, who Bucky can scent and see is definitely not the extra curvy Persephone, wave from further up the treeline ahead of them. “And I was just on the edge of the whole thing - witness and secondary pack feelings between you two. I might need a cigarette.” Steve mutters as he runs one hand through his hair and then down his face after taking a deep breath and letting it out.

“You haven’t smoked since 1938,” Bucky remarks with an eyeroll. “And that was before we knew it was bad for you, punk.”

“And this was one of the most terrible evenings of your life so far!” Steve turns his light blue eyes towards her with his Captain America signature disapproving glare at her overly perky tone. “The Seelie Queen says thank you. In that special fair folk way,” Duchess lays on the happy sarcastic tone as they approach the trio.

“As if I give a single fuck,” The woman’s dark voice growls out, her full lips set in a frown at the news. “How do you feel, mikrí mou skoteiní?”

“I told you, your little dark one is fine,” Hades reiterates with an eyeroll.

“I feel wonderful now, eroméni.” Duchess squeezes Bucky’s hand before ducking under his arm and pressing her forehead against Hecate’s as they intertwine both their hands, the power swirling softly around the two of them.

Bucky can feel the comfort in the darkness and mist that surround them temporarily, the two pulling apart and grinning at each other more like sisters or best friends than what they were.

“Mistress, this is my Bucky,” She stretches her hand out to him, Bucky forever heeding her siren call as he slips his hand into hers. “And that is our Steve Rogers.”

“I am honored to be in your company, gentleman. My mikrí mou skoteiní needs more family. I am glad she has found not only her mate, but a pack.” Her face shifts minutely from ecstatic to a little teasing. “One that will surely grow soon?”

“My baby doesn’t need to be having babies just yet!” Cerberus says in his deep honeyed voice, the slight echo noticeable now.

“My ma raised me right, ma’am. I got to mate and marry her before we go that path. My girl hasn’t even been to Coney Island.”

“Psssh. You haven’t been to Disneyland.”

“I was starting with Brookyln and Coney Island, doll.”

“Whatever you say, handsome,” She sighs out with a smile as Hades chuckles.

“And so it begins, Bucky.” Bucky grins down at his mate.

“I can’t wait.”

“Cheeseballs...the both of you,” Steve laughs out as Hades pulls Duchess into a hug, kissing her forehead before pulling away.

“Bring the boy down in a few days for brunch. Persephone will be elated, well more elated, to see you mated and bonded. Steve is welcome as well. You know how we love certain companies in the Underworld.”

“I shall bring the handmaidens as well. Perhaps we can get Mr. Rogers a mate as well,” Hecate teases again as Steve’s ears and neck turn bright red.

“We’ll call to check in tomorrow,” Hades continues, hand stuck out to Bucky who shakes it more firmly than last time which makes the God of the Underworld’s smile widen. “Gentlemen.” He extends his hand to Steve, giving him his own hard handshake before stepping back for Cerberus to enthusiastically hug all three of them.

“I love new pack members!” His echo-y deep timber reveals his obvious happiness, Hecate eye rolling good-naturedly beside him.

“I’ll text you later,” a smirk is painted on her full lips as she stares at Duchess. “But I understand if you are busy.”

“Goodnight Hecate!” comes Duchess’s embarrassed reaction, Bucky wrapping his metal arm around her waist and winking at Hecate. “Stop that!” She swats at Bucky’s chest playfully, just for him to catch it and kiss her fingertips.

“Let’s head home, doll.” Her eyes brighten instantly.

“Ooooh! I’ve never been to Stark Tower!” She states as Steve full belly laughs.

“He meant your bar or our shared apartment in Brooklyn.”

“But I’ll take you to the Tower in a few days,” Bucky promises with a kiss to her open palm as her temporary puppy dog eyes brighten.

“Goodnight all,” Hecate and Hades state simultaneously as Cerberus gives Duchess one last kiss to her cheek before rubbing his own cheek against it.

“Goodnight!” Steve, Bucky and Duchess chime in reply, watching the gods and guardian take a handful of steps before disappearing further up the path to the right, Bucky leading his pack down the left path towards 74th Street. 

“So, whatcha up to later, Sargent?” Duchess begins as they enter the area just before the Boathouse Restaurant, squinting just a bit at the brightness.

“Well, I got this mate who smells like fresh baked bread, lemon squares, cayenne, and a little hint of mint - who is in dire need of a mating mark and bond. And lots of baby making practice. Then I was thinking I take her for lunch at the Tower in a couple days to show her off.”

“Can you schedule an old school tour after the Tower lunch?”

“Of course, doll,” Bucky’s accent thickens a little as her eyes soften as she looks up at him. “I’ll even show you everywhere we got our asses kicked when we were young.”

“And by ‘ours’ he means mine after 1934,” Steve says from Bucky’s other side with a scoff, sending Duchess a wink as they get past the Alice in Wonderland bit and start on the path down towards the Model Boathouse.

“Whatever you guys wanna show me,” Duchess sighs out happily, leaning into Bucky and reaching around his back to take Steve’s hand. Steve squeezes back before kissing the back of her hand and releasing it, happy to have her in the pack.

“I’ll grab some stuff, but I’ll stay near - up in Natasha’s apartment a few floors up. Just let me know when it’s safe,” He chuckles out as a flustered look passes over her face. “Don’t worry, kid, it’s natural. Just lots of good luck to our furniture in the house with this Alpha.”

“Is Natasha’s floor far enough away, punk?”

“Well, I love my pack already,” Duchess murmurs as Bucky and Steve continue ribbing each other, watching the stars compete with the New York City lights as a few leaves rustle in the breeze and fall on the bright path ahead of them.

“Doll, as corny as it sounds, it’s amazing how I could try but I could never explain what I hear when you don't say a thing. Just your scent and hearing your heartbeat is a different kind of magic,” Bucky whispers against her hair before kissing her soft cheek, his metal fingers entwined with hers naturally.

“If every bit of magic was stripped from me tonight, I would be okay with it. Because the best magic I’ve ever received is you.”

Bless ya’ll for making it through my long ass rambling stories <3

@stay-frosty-royal-unicorn @chelsea072498 @clockworkmorningglory @sakurablossom4 @galaxiesinmymind @thewhiterabbit42​ @nobodys-baby-now​ @mizzezm​​

**PICTURE IS NOT MINE - FOUND ON GOOGLE**

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[elphiej]

Be My Light - Chapter 2: Her Devil, His Angel

*Pairing: Yoongi X Reader

*Genre: Mafia, angst, eventual smut, slow burn

*Warnings: Language, violence, reference to physical / emotional abuse, blood 

Author’s note: Hi everyone. Thank you for sticking with me. I am also uploading Be My Light up on AO3 under the same username. I’ll link below. Please feel free to comment and let me know what you think or what you liked about it. I get really excited when I see what you guys like. I hope you like it. 

Tag list: @lolalalooo​ @bangtan-sonyeonddaeng​, @barbikatherine​, @mrsfortune1306, @lovesick-heart0​, @iamnamjoonsbxtch​, @deathkat657​, @deeepvibes​

                                  Chapter 2: Her Devil, His Angel

               Almost there, you thought as you quickened your pace to your bus stop. Nothing had passed you on the road, so you were sure there was plenty of time before the bus arrived just beyond the construction. But with the morning you were having, you wouldn’t stop worrying until you were seated at the bench. You felt yourself smile a bit as you drew closer and closer to the shopping center; it was so large, and you were sure there were so many surprises lurking inside. You hoped it wouldn’t be too long before you could go in and find something special. 

               A black car went racing past you as breakneck speed, from seemingly nowhere, leaving you shivering from the blast wind that trailed behind. I must not be the only one having a crazy morning, you thought as your eyes followed the SUV’s taillights. As you passed in front of the construction zone, you saw the gate of the fence that surrounded it had been opened, leading to the paved entrance. Could the car have come from here? You stopped walking long enough to look around; nothing looked out of place, at least to you, and there didn’t seem to be any vandalism. Did they go inside? The chain on one of the doors had been unlatched and left hanging from the handle of the propped open doors. Or it would have been one of the workers checking on things and needed to leave quickly? You supposed there could be a lot of conclusions; instantly thinking something bad had happened just because of the gang activity wasn’t the best thing to ease your anxiety. It was best just to keep going. The bus stop was in sight at the edge of the fence.

               Before you could sit on the bench, you heard a loud ‘popping’ sound from the building behind you. You wanted to say it was a car backfiring or a firecracker, but it was too rapid to be anything else. Ever since you had lived in Central, you learned how to tell the difference. You could hear some loud yells that sounded like it was coming from the other side of the building. But the shots were coming from inside the building. You should run away and hide somewhere safe; you know you should. And you started to back away, reaching for your phone to call the police. You heard more yells and footsteps heading your direction. There was nothing close by to duck into, so you hid yourself behind a trashcan on the other side of the bench. Peering around, you see two large men, both dressed in black suits, holding semi-automatic handguns. They were looking, wildly, up and down the street. You prayed they wouldn’t find you, not knowing what would happen.

               “They’re not here! I don’t see a car anywhere! They must have got away,” one of the men said, out of breath.

               “What did you expect after that fucking chase? Everywhere they ducked into was rigged with one of Vante’s traps! I can’t believe that fucker got in there and did all that with no one noticing him. My eyes are still burning from that pepper spray.”

               “Tell me about it,” the first one replied, “On the third floor, he set off another smoke bomb and had trip wires all over the place. I almost busted my ass! He had every floor rigged with some kind of stupid trap. Yao went into an empty shop on the third floor and the security door came rolling down and locked him inside; they’re still trying to get him out.”

               “Well, Vante and the blond are gone. And Choi’s going to have our heads. No matter how many traps we suffered through.”

               “Maybe, but there are still the other two. I heard them chasing someone above us when we were pepper sprayed. Chen had said one of them was shot twice; there’s no way he’s making it out alive. Fairly sure it’s the youngest that’s still running around. Choi would be pleased if he could lay one of them out and get that secretive maknae they’re always protecting.  If we can corner him and capture him, that teaches them not to mess with the Royals. Let’s go check around back and help corner the fucking brat. Bet he’s hiding in some stairwell.”

               “As long as there’s no more damn traps…,” the other man trailed off in a low grumble.

               The two men turned and ran back towards the side of the building. So, the speeding car must have been who they were looking for. No wonder they were driving like their lives depended on it, you thought. Whoever they were looking for must have wandered into a gang meeting? And there were more still in the building, hurt, being hunted down. You needed to leave, call the police, protect yourself. But you found yourself looking back at the building, and a thought emerged that really affected you. For much of the life you remembered, you had been bullied. You wished, back then, someone had stood up to protect you. Now, after all the therapies and hard work, you were trying to stand up for others like you. These gangs were nothing but bullies and the city was you, looking for someone to take a stand and help. You knew you were nothing compared to the men with guns and weapons, but there were people who needed help. The police would take too long, and you couldn’t stand the idea of letting someone die. Sometimes people need to do scary things to help people. Your father had always helped people; as a police officer he had ran into danger. You were a nurse; you could help them until the authorities came. All you needed to do was stay out of sight. Suddenly, the person Amber wanted you to be took over and that scared girl hiding behind the trash can disappeared, as you stood up and eased over to the open fence, peering around to see if anyone was there.

               You pulled your phone out and called 911, quickly telling the operator what was going on; you were a nurse at Central Mercy, there was an active gang shooting with possible multiple injuries, and that you needed an ambulance to Central Mercy along with police. You hung up after the operator confirmed that they were on the way and to stay away from the scene. There was no talking you out of it. Someone needed to help before someone lost their life unnecessarily. The area around the open fence was clear of people, but from inside you could hear people were running around and yelling. You ran to the door, and slipped in once you saw the coast was clear.

               Inside was dimly lit, and every noise echoed in the open concrete building. You couldn’t see anyone on the ground level; the noises seemed to be coming from the upper floors, where you could hear people yelling commands, breaking glass, and throwing things around. Whoever they were looking for must be hiding. You moved, quietly, into the open food court area, looking for some sign. This is stupid, you are so stupid, you kept chanting as you kept moving. On a box next to you, there was a crowbar and you snatched it up, holding it as if it was a bat. It may not do anything against a gun, but it made you feel a little secure as more shots were fired above you. There was a bunch of yelling; from the sounds of it, they hadn’t caught the young man the ones outside had mentioned. And you hoped they wouldn’t. But then, you heard someone yell, ‘He’s running towards the fire escape! Take him down’. It was quickly followed by more shouting, more shots fired, a scream, and the sound of glass breaking.  As you made it to the fountain in the middle of the space, really wishing you would get out of there, you heard someone running. It was closer than the ones that echoed above you, and you could hear heavy breathing getting closer and closer. You crouched down against the wall of the fountain, gripping the metal bar tighter and trying to keep your breathing as quiet as you could. The footfalls got closer and closer, and they were not even steps like the two suited men from outside, and the breathing sounded labored and strained.

               Around a corner, the owner of the steps came into your view. It was not a suited man, but a younger looking man with sweaty, blond hair, and a pale face. He was alone and swaying on his feet as he moved, with difficulty, towards the fountain. His breathing came in harsh gasps. He stumbled and hit the ground hard, hissing and struggled to get back up. From your hiding spot, you saw there was a massive blood stain on the red coat he wore from a bullet wound in his shoulder, with blood dripping from his limp hand. His other arm was wrapped around his waist and his black shirt seemed like it was wet, as well. As he tried to push himself up, you saw blood on his other hand, too. This had to be the one the two gang members were talking about, the one who was hurt. Instantly, you felt your heart break seeing someone so hurt. As he struggled to push up on his shaky arm, he tilted his head up.

               Then, he finally noticed you.

               Your eyes locked with his dark brown eyes. At first, he just stared at you, as if he couldn’t figure out if you were real or not. His eyes – you couldn’t help but think that they were so captivating and beautiful- kept searching yours for some kind of sign, like he was expecting you to turn into something else. But then, he realized that you were not a figment of his pain-induced imagination and that you were really sitting there. His eyes got bigger as he pushed himself to get to his unsteady feet, but his arm gave out and he dropped back to the ground. Some of the strands of his blond hair were stained red from an open cut at his hairline.

               Before you could move to him, you heard someone coming. The young man heard them too and tried again to stand up, only to fall again. He turned his eyes back to you. His lips moved but you were so focused on the steps that you didn’t hear him. A man in a black suit, like the ones from outside, came around the corner. He looked around before his eyes fell upon the bleeding blond. The smile that cracked his face made your pulse race in your ears. It reminded you of the smile Daniel had shown you when you said you were leaving. The suited man let out a chuckle as he stalked over to the young man.

               “There you are, you son of a bitch. Who would have thought you would have made it this far in your condition. Choi’s going to be so happy that he’s gonna get to finish you off.” He kneeled down next to his prey and fisted his blond hair, pulling him up to his knees. “And I’ll get such a reward for capturing you. And it’s only a matter of time before they catch your little friend. Last I heard, they cornered him on the second floor. He almost made it to the fire escape. I can’t wait to see your face when I smash his skull against the floor. After Choi has his own fun, that is.”

               You couldn’t stop the gasp from escaping your lips as the mental image filled your mind. Two sets of eyes slid over to you. The suited man seemed startled at your presence and it took him a moment to fully process you. Slowly, that predator look he wore slipped back into place. He, roughly, released the youth and rose to his feet. His steps towards you were slow and heavy. And with each step, his well-tailored suit changed to a pair of worn jeans and a whiskey-soaked jacket. With each step, he became your ex as he stalked you against the wall of your apartment. Then back to the suited gang member with a gun in his belt. The edges of your vision started to darken and get fuzzy from panic. You pushed away from the fountain, trembling fingers releasing the only weapon you could protect yourself with, and tried to crawl away from his gaze. But he grabbed you by the ankle and dragged you back to his grasp. He grabbed you by the collar of your coat and crouched on top of you.

               Just like Daniel had done after he backhanded you for asking why you couldn’t leave.

               “Well, what do we have here? A little bitch who wandered into the wrong place at the wrong time, maybe? Do you belong to him? Or were you trying to play hero? What a fucking joke! You should have minded your own business! Now, I’m gonna have to teach you a lesson.”

               You just couldn’t be the happy little bitch I asked you to be. You had to go sticking your nose where it didn’t belong. Guess I’m gonna have to teach you a lesson, Daniel’s voice echoed behind the suited man’s words.

               “No,” you gasp, not sure who you were responding to, “please stop. I’m sorry!”

               He pulled you up to your feet, fingers biting into your arms. “Sorry isn’t gonna help you. You’ve seen too much. I doubt the boss will want to keep you around for a quick fuck either; you’re not pretty enough for that.”

               You should be thankful someone like me even wants to be around you. You’re nothing but useless. You’re not even good looking. Not even pretty enough to call a girlfriend.

               Your heart was racing; all the emotions were flooding your mind. Suddenly, you were back in your old apartment wanting to leave to make everyone happier. Daniel was screaming at you, breaking down every shred of courage you had mustered to tell him you were leaving. His hands were bruising your arms as he was about to throw you against the coffee table when you moved towards the door. There was a crack echoing in your mind as your head contacted with the wood then the wall as he slammed you against it. No, this wasn’t happening again! But the suited man kept changing forms, both faces sharing that venomous smirk. You were gonna be a victim again, forever trapped by his words and actions.

You were useless.

               “No!” You squeezed your eyes shut and brought your knee up as hard as you could, hitting him right in the stomach. The man stumbled back and it gave you enough time to reach down for the crowbar and swing it up. It connected with Daniel’s face as he moved towards you again. You swung it again, and it hit the suited man in the back as he doubled over. With a surge of rage that had been hidden within all the fear and anxiety, you swung again and again.

               When the red in your vision faded, the suited man was on the ground, unmoving. You stared down at him, breathing hard. For a moment, you weren’t sure what had happened. Was he dead? How did that happen? The weight of the crowbar in your hand brought it back to you. You were protecting yourself the way you wished you had before. The suited man had triggered your memory so strongly that all that pent of anger Amber had always said needed to be addressed came surging out. You stared at the crowbar in utter shock. How did you do that? You glanced down at the unconscious suited man before you; you nudged him with your foot and let out a sigh of relief when he let out a moan. He may have been trying to attack you, but you really didn’t want to kill anyone. It went against your whole purpose of running into this hell hole.

Your eyes darted back to the bleeding man leaning heavily against the edge of the fountain. You dropped the crowbar, making a loud ‘bang’, and ran over to him, wrapping your arm around him and steading him. He, unknowingly, leaned his weight against you and his head pressed against your shoulder. You got a better look at his wounds; the cut on his forehead was long but not deep, and the gun shot wound in his shoulder was bleeding quite a bit. There was no exit wound, so the bullet was still lodged somewhere in his flesh. You reached down and moved his shirt from his side to see another gunshot wound, deep and heavily bleeding. He tried to push you away.

               “What are you doing here,” he hissed at you through clenched teeth. “Get out of here! They’ll kill you.”

               “I handled that one,” you said, nodding your head in the direction of the suited man, “didn’t I?”

               “Barely. I could have handled him.” Was he seriously dismissing your effort? “A few lucky swings aren’t gonna save you from a gunshot. You need to get out of here. Just leave me here. They’re coming.”

               You eased his limp arm over your shoulder, wrapped your arm around his back to his uninjured side, and pulled him to his shaky feet. “I’m not leaving you here. You’ll either bleed out or whoever is looking for you will finish you off. Come on, I’m gonna get you out.”

               “You shouldn’t be in here. What were you thinking?”

               “Are you really berating me right now? I am trying to save you, you know. From where I’m standing, my lack of skills would have fared better than you. Why are you here, anyways?

               Despite his weakened state, the man struggled in your grasp, trying to push you away. “Are you crazy?”

               “No,” you said as you lead the way towards the door, “I’m a nurse at Central Mercy. And I don’t like bullies. Just focus on staying awake, alright? I promise I’ll get us out of here alive. And when we do, I want the full explanation of who I just knocked out and what I got myself into saving you. Deal?”

               “Whatever-“

               “Look down there,” you heard someone yell from behind you, “I heard something! He couldn’t have gotten far.”

               You felt the man flinch in your grip at the sound of the harsh voice. The sounds of heavy steps sounded like a rolling thunder in the wide space. There was no way you were going to make it out the door before someone noticed you, especially with the way the blond man was stumbling with each step. He was losing too much blood, and whatever headwound he had sustained had him straining to keep conscious. You looked around for something to hide behind. There were some boxes and crates but that wouldn’t be good enough. With the steps and voices getting closer, you made your way to one of the food service counters, and crouched down behind it. The thunder of footsteps seemed to patter off into different directions, but one could still be heard walking into the space. There was the sound of something scraping behind them. You braved to glance around the edge of the counter to see. At the fountain, right where you had hidden yourself a few moments ago, was a tall, well dressed man in a light blue suit. While he seemed the type to take care of his appearance, he looked crazed and disheveled. In one gloved hand, he held a gun while the other was a silver, ornate cane. His eyes were locked on the fallen man; This had to be the big boss based on his attire, you assumed. He made a noise of disappointment before turning his attention to a small pool of blood from where the blond had fallen. He dipped the edge of the cane in the crimson liquid, and brought it up to his eyes. At first, you worried he was going to taste it, like some modern vampire. But he smiled and started to walk forward, dragging the cane behind him, leaving a red trail. The way he stalked through the space you couldn’t help but feel a sense of dread. Your heart was beating so fast; this was beyond terrifying, but you needed to focus. You felt a shaky hand reach over and grab hold of yours. He gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. The young man, despite chiding you earlier, was trying to keep you from falling too far into your fear.  

               “I know you’re here, Agust,” the chilling voice called out into the space. “Come out, come out, wherever you are. Still have some fight in you? You did a number on my man. I should return the favor.”

               The voice made a loud yell and a sudden crash exploded in the space. You brought your hand to your mouth to keep your gasp of surprise from alerting the walking embodiment of death. The man had brought his cane down upon the boxes you thought to hide behind, and smashed them. He kicked the shatter pieces out of his path and moved on, dragging the cane again. The steps were closer, and you figured he had come to one of the other food counters. You prayed he wouldn’t find you because you weren’t sure what would happen if he did. Suddenly, the blond let go of your hand and reached behind him. He pulled out a black, studded gun. You couldn’t begin to wonder what you had actually gotten yourself into. His hand was shaky too much and he pressed it into your hand before placing his over yours; was he intending to have you shoot him? Could you? Or was he using you as a steady when you were shaking just as bad as him? You stared at him with wide eyes, but he shushed you and moved your hands where he needed them.

               “Hiding like a scared child? I thought you were better than that. But we have the same problem as before; you still have a heart. You should have let your boy die, Agust. Then, you could have gotten away to face another day. But now, you’re bleeding out. You’re gonna die. Unless I find you.” The cane hit against one of the counters and scraped across it. The sound made you shiver. The blond held you hand tighter, his finger against yours near the trigger. His eyes were feverish, and he was getting paler than before. The voice continued to move closer. “I’m gonna take my time with you. I’ll make sure you don’t die yet. It’s a matter of time before we find your boy. I want you to watch while I unmask him and break him. And I’ll remind you how it’s all your fault as I make him scream. Only after I break him so no one can ever fix him, then I’ll take my time with you. I’ll make sure to take pictures to send to your friends. I’ll make sure they know who they’re dealing with.”

               The voice was so close now, you were sure he was only a few steps away. The footsteps stopped and you could hear the man taking a deep breath. Then, he was quiet. You were holding your breath, your lungs burning. The menacing man, then, took an audible sniff of the air. He did it again and again, as if he was a bloodhound. What was he smelling? Or was this just another tactic to try and scare them out of hiding. Another few steps and you were sure he was in front of your counter. The blond’s hand started to move, ready to use your hand to help him get a steady shot. The man beyond the counter started to lean over when-

               “Sir!”

               The man stopped and turned his attention away from the counter. “Chen, what did you find? Did you track them down?”

               The man, Chen, came up to him.  “No sir, the two escaped in a vehicle. They lost our men running through different levels and shops. They set up a bunch of snares and traps. I had men ready to chase them but Vante did a number on the cars. They’re long gone.”

               “What about the boy?”

               “We couldn’t catch him.” You felt the blond let out a sigh of relief. “He jumped through a window on the second floor.” That explained the broken glass sound you heard. “By time the men got out there, he had dashed into the alleyways and we lost his trail.” A cell phone rang, and for a moment, you feared it was yours, but Chen answered it. “Sir, we need to go. Police are on the way here. The men can hear the sirens. Someone tipped them off.”

               “Damn it,” the man snapped. He slammed the cane against the counter. “Did anyone find Agust?”

               “No, sir. He must have gotten out. The front door and gate are opened. He must have escaped. Maybe the two in the car swung back around and got him.”

               “No, he’s still here somewhere. I can feel it. He’s too hurt to have gotten away from me. There’s too much blood splattered. He has to be close by.” The man took another deep breath. “Do you smell that?”

               “Sir, I can’t smell anything. But we really need to leave. The police are close. Please, if he’s that hurt, he won’t make it until the police get here. You’ve won the battle, sir.”

               “Unless there’s a body, there is no victory.” You heard as he started to move away from the counter. “Grab that idiot over there. Tell the men to get us out of here.”

               You waited until the steps disappeared and the space was all quiet. In the background, you could hear the sounds of police and ambulance sirens coming closer and closer, and the fear you had started to ebb away. You glanced around the counter to make sure they were truly gone before dropping your hand and taking a deep breath. It was going to be ok. The young man’s hand slipped from yours and dropped to his side. Suddenly, your panic started to return. You dropped the gun and moved in front of him, tapping his cheek to keep him awake and checking his pulse. His eyes were glossy and unfocused, his skin so pale and cold. The blood soaked his clothes and wasn’t slowing. You shrugged off your backpack and stripped your jacket off, ignoring the chill of the space, and pressed the material against the wound to stop the bleeding. The man jerked and hissed but his body was too weak to fight it. The sirens got closer still, but it felt like an eternity for you to hear the rush of police calling out. You yelled out for a medic, alerting the police where you were and who you were. Then, you leaned close to the blond stranger.

               “Hey, you got to stay with me, alright? I’m gonna get you out of here, remember? We’re gonna get you to the hospital and patch you up. But I need you to stay awake. Remember, you promised to tell me what I got myself into.” His eyes couldn’t seem to focus on yours and kept slipping closed. You patted his check again, leaving bloody prints. You reached for his hand instead. You squeezed it as he had done not so long ago, trying to bring his focus on you. “Come on, stay with me. Can you squeeze my hand? Talk to me? Tell me your name. Tell me how dumb I am for running into an active shooting scene. Tell me I’m a hot mess. Anything, just stay with me.”

               His hooded eyes caught yours and he tilted his head to the side. He slipped his hand from yours and laid it against your cheek. “Angel,” he whispered, before his hand dropped and his body went limp.

[angstysebfan]

Did I Take A Step Too Far Part 10

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Summary: You and Bucky were best friends, but one night you took your relationship to the next level. You you want to continue moving forward, but Bucky acts like he regrets it, and even tries to move on.

Warnings: angst

You sat nervously waiting for Jeremy to arrive, hating this whole situation. You heard a knock on the door and opened it nervously to see Jeremy with a small smile on your face. You step aside to allow him in your room and close the door. You are 100% certain he can hear your heart pounding. 

You motion for him to sit on the bed while you stand in front of him, trying to gain the confidence to speak. He looks at you with a nervous expression, but when he sees your face he sighs and drops his head. “I get it.” he says. You move to sit next to him and open your mouth to speak, but he beats you to it. 

“It’s him. It’s Bucky, that’s who you want. I get it. I’m stupid to think you would abandon the guy you love for me.” he says not looking at you. You tentatively put your hand on his forearm. “I’m sorry. I just don’t want to lead you on and drag you further into this mess I have made when I know in the end it will be him. I pushed him away so many times and have regretted it, and I just can’t do it again.” you say honestly. 

Jeremy looks into your eyes for a moment before kissing your cheek. “I wish you the best, Y/N. God knows you deserve it, and I hope he is everything you want.” He gets up and heads toward the door, but quickly turns and looks at you, “Thank you for doing this in person and not on the phone. I think that would have hurt a lot worse.”

You walk up and hug him, “You deserve an amazing girl, who will love you with every fiber of her being.” you whisper. He nods and leaves the room. You release the breath you were holding and shake the nerves away. One down, now you need to get your man! You wait a few minutes until you are sure Jeremy is gone and head out into the common room where Steve and Sam are.

“Have you guys seen Bucky?” you ask. They both give you a nervous look. “What?” you ask. Steve speaks first, “What was Jeremy doing here?” he asks. You furrow your brows, “I was telling him the truth. I want Bucky, why?” you ask. Both guys smile, but there is something troubling in their expressions. 

“He thought you were choosing Jeremy and left about 15 minutes ago.” Sam said giving you a sad smile. You panic for a moment, “Do you know where he is?” you ask looking between both guys. They both shake their head no. You grab your cell phone and call him. It goes to voicemail after a few rings. You try again and again, but he doesn’t answer. You text him and he doesn’t respond. Of all the stupid, idiotic things for him to do, this takes the cake!

Steve tries to calm you down as you walk back and forth in the common room. He calls Bucky also, but gets no answer. Finally you have had enough, you were going to go out and find him. Before you could leave you realize how stupid you were, “FRIDAY, track Sergeant Barnes’ phone please and send the coordinates to my cell phone.” you say to the AI.  You walk to the elevator as you get the coordinates.

--

Bucky is nursing his whiskey sitting at the bar. He can’t help thinking what an idiot he was to think he could actually have a chance with you. There was too much water under the bridge for this to work. He tries to keep to himself, but a beautiful woman comes over the flirt with him. He allows this to happen, seeing as he is single.

After about 20 minutes of talking, he has his arms wrapped around her waist, whispering into her ear about how he wants to meet her in the bathroom. The woman giggles and tells him to meet her in 2 minutes. As she walks away he sees you standing there with your arms crossed.

“Surprise.” you say, clearly annoyed. Bucky downs the rest of his whiskey and stands, as you walk over to him. “What are you doing here Y/N? Come to officially reject me? Well I got the message when Jeremy came over. Don’t worry, I’ll move on, in fact I have to meet someone in the bathroom now.” he says nonchalantly. 

You smack him across the face, which makes his eyebrows shoot to his hairline. “I was telling Jeremy I wanted you, you fucking asshole! I was dumping him for you! But go ahead and meet your girl in the bathroom, don’t let me stop you! I can’t believe I actually thought we could finally be together!” you yell before turning and leaving the bar.

You don’t get far before a metal hand grabs your arm to stop you. You open your mouth to protest when you suddenly feel his lips on yours. You fight him and push him away. “What the fuck! You can’t do that when you were just about to have sex with someone else!” You shout. Bucky just looks at you.

“I didn’t do anything with her, I promise. I thought we were over, I’m sorry. I’m fucking stupid, you know that! But I am here, I don’t want that girl, I want this girl.” He said sliding his hands around your waist. You look into his eyes, hurt evident in them.

“Is it ever going to be easy with us? I hate this back and forth all the time!” you say as he pulls you closer and kisses your forehead. “I think it will, now that we are both on the same page and know how each other feels.” he said. You push back slightly, and look up at him.

“You ever do something that this again and I will castrate you!” you say, smirking after. Bucky laughs and pulls you closer looking into your eyes. “I do anything like this again and I will let you castrate me, deal?” he says. You nod and lean in to kiss him again.

--

Epilogue

You have been dating Bucky for one year, and you have to say, it’s been pretty great. You both learned that communication is key, and that has definitely helped your relationship. You officially move in together and even got a cat, Alpine. 

You spend pretty much every day together, hating to be apart. You notice however, over the last few weeks, Bucky has been slightly distant. He has been hiding when on the phone, texting someone all the time, and going out alone for hours on end. You get nervous that he found someone else. Maybe him and Ashley got back together.

You shake it off, knowing Ashley and Jeremy actually got together and have been in a loving relationship together. So was it someone else? You try to tell Nat and Wanda about your feelings, but they tell you that you are probably over reacting. You try to think past it, but you know something is up.

One day Nat suggests you going for a walk to calm down. You had a breakdown in her room about your theory. You walked to Central Park and stroll around for hours. Then you walk along the West Side Highway and walk up the Hudson River. You finally receive text from your boyfriend, hours later asking where you are. You ignore him and keep walking. 

When it was finally too dark to continue, you make your way back toward the tower. You feel utterly defeated, the walk doing nothing. When you get up to the residential floors, you notice that all is quiet, which is weird for a Friday night. You head to your shared bedroom, your head hanging low. When you open the door your breath gets caught in your throat.

The room is surrounded by lit candles and roses. Bucky is standing in the middle of the room in jeans and his red henley. Tears flood to your eyes as you stumble into the room to Bucky’s extended hand. He pulls you toward him and holds your left hand as he wipes the tears from your eyes with his flesh hand.

“Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N, you are the light and love of my life. I love you more than anything is this world. You have been my best friend for three years, and my best girl for one. I have loved every moment spent with you, and I can’t wait to see what the future holds for us. I won’t say I love you to the moon and back because that has an ending. To quote one of your favorite Disney movies, I love you... to infinity and beyond”, because my love for you is never ending.”

You are sobbing as Bucky drops to one knee, taking the black velvet box out of his pocket and opening it up to the most beautiful diamond ring you have ever seen. “My love, my heart, my soul is yours forever. Doll, will you please marry me?” he says as tears start pooling in his eyes.

You choke on the sob, nodding since the words won’t come out. Bucky stands and pulls you into a passionate kiss. When you pull back you just keep chanting, “yes, yes, yes I will marry you.” You hug him tightly, never wanting to let go. You can’t believe you thought the worst again. You and Bucky had a love of a lifetime, and neither of you will ever let it go.

I guess they were right. Some men and women can’t just be friends, which is okay by you in this instance.

--

Previous Part

That’s it. Ended it major fluffballs! Feedback is appreciated!

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[saladejin]

Call An Uber? | 01

BTS x Reader | idolverse au, uber driver!Reader, translator!Reader | Fluff, flirting, super slow burn, angst and hurt/comfort, mature themes and eventual smut 

Summary:  Your normal life with a normal, yet inconsistent job gets drastically changed when your dreams come true. Sounds boring right?

What happens when all of this occurs, but you’re still doing something you love AND getting a large sum for it? Now there’s something to think about, and it’s definitely not what you’re thinking. 

Warnings: Mild swearing, hysterical fan behaviour 

Word Count: 7.1k (Chapter 1 is longer than usual)

A/N: Okay, so in my next phase of finally crossposting my works to tumblr, I’m adding this massive multi-chapter fic. 

I began this slow-burner (emphasis on slow-burn) a couple of years ago, so it’s easy to see how my writing has changed and evolved throughout.

Basically, I wanted to imagine what it would be like to have one of those ‘chance encounters’ every fan has thought of at least once. Thus, this fic was born, and though it is full of coincidences and wishful thinking, I always try to work realistically to make it enjoyable (and not as foolish as the premise makes it sound).

I hope you enjoy the ride, and feel free to check out the rest on my Ao3 in the meantime while I try my best to transfer everything in an orderly fashion! <3

»»————- << masterpost | next >>　————-««  

      Reader 1st person POV

Imagine being asked to remember the most boring day of your whole existence. If you're anything like me, then it's a bit hard to recall...but for once I was certain.

Today was that day.

Or it was, until something outrageous happened. Something so unprecedented and so unbelievable that I struggle to recall it at all.

I suppose I'll give it my best shot anyway. 

A clear and uneventful morning leading straight into the annoyingly peaceful afternoon, and I had still only picked up and dropped off a measly number of people. Yes, being an Uber driver had its ups and downs, and I had been one for about a year and a half already. It paid decently enough most of the time, and the job just worked hand-in-hand with the flashy new car leaving a gaping hole in my bank account.

Despite all these alleged perks, today had been an obviously gruelling exception.

The lack of activity could be blamed on a number of scenarios, for instance a public holiday or event stirring attention somewhere else. Whatever it was, it was decreasing the number of customers in this usually bustling city of Seoul much to my dismay. I needed good cash, and I’d been working my ass off lately in order to get exactly that. Even closing myself off to social media and other forms of communication with friends helped me focus solely on working nowadays.

I need a real job… 

Then suddenly, even as cliché as it sounds, God decided to answer all of my prayers. A loud ding emitted from my phone and I almost veered off the road in sheer astonishment.

“Thank the Lord!” I pulled up quickly onto the curb and examined the Uber request, almost questioning if I had imagined the whole thing out of desperation.

The name read ‘J’. Literally just the letter, boldly sitting in the middle of my screen. I raised an eyebrow, and normally would have considered declining the request if it seemed too prank-worthy, but I needed this job. I didn’t think the person had even registered or used the service before, as there wasn’t a clear rating to be seen anywhere. Once again...I needed this job.

The pinpoint appeared nearby, and luckily it was only about a five-minute drive to reach the destination. It was located just outside a large shopping mall in central Seoul, and even though this was a seemingly quiet day, it shouldn’t have been this empty. There were of course a few groups of people and individual shoppers wandering about, in and out of the entrance looking for easy buys. Even so, I knew this place to be quite popular and to say I was astounded would be an understatement.

There must be something going on in the city somewhere. 

Making a grab for my phone about three minutes after looking around for ‘J’, I considered sending him or her a text to ask where they were. The place was basically empty, so spotting someone on the lookout for their ride shouldn’t have been too difficult.

“They mustn’t be out yet.” I clucked quietly to myself, typing out a message to indicate I had arrived.

The gentle hum of my engine was the only sound accompanying me as I waited. After another thirty seconds, I received a short reply of “there soon”. I glanced at the simple words a second time before lightly scoffing.

“Okay ‘J’, I’m in no rush.”

Still amused over the less than eloquent reply, I leant back into my comfortable leather seat and hummed to myself to pass some time. I would’ve usually had the radio going, but for now I wasn’t really in the mood for any background distractions. I liked silence when it was comfortable, and especially in a place such as this shopping mall, it was rare to come by.

The reverie was soon shattered when faint sounds of various screams erupted from somewhere in the distance, and I instantly jerked my head up with squinted eyes to observe the area. Tinted car windows revealed just enough of the area to discern an overall lack of movement.

The paved courtyard outside the mall wasn’t occupied by a single human being, which was even stranger than before. The only moving things I could eventually see where a couple of dirtied napkins being thrown around in the slight breeze, and a ripped paper cup from a popular juice bar rolling around caught in the same fate.

The frantic screaming continued. Should I be worried? The shouting wasn’t in terror or anger, that much I was sure of. I usually would pin it on some brawl breaking out nearby, but these sounds where mostly female when I listened closer. In any sense, it definitely sounded extreme.

I wondered briefly if there was some massive sale happening at a famous clothes brand down the street, causing a flurry of panic within female shoppers. The anticipation from the sounds caused me to tap my fingers on the steering wheel in curiosity.

Then it happened. An enormous group of Korean women and probably a few men, some looking fairly young, flocked around the corner of a building in an intense hurry.

Was the sale here or something??

My eyes widened in shock, as the group only seemed to be growing in numbers. Many were holding their phones out, as if recording something, and I scanned the rapidly moving crowd with anxious eyes to spot the source of the commotion.

Two well-dressed men seemed to be caught in the centre of it all. The pair that stemmed this chaotic crowd were clad from head to toe in designer clothes, including darkly coloured masks and sunglasses, not to mention the hoods covering their heads. The shorter of the two donned a lighter colour palette through a milky white button-up, while the other was dressed in a charcoal black hoodie and black ripped jeans.

They appeared to be trying to escape the bundling mass of people, as they moved quickly and swiftly ahead of the horde in their haste. I gripped the wheel in surprise. The screams where deafening and I could feel them grating my nerves. I hoped my client would not be caught in this mess. I wanted out, and I wanted out as soon as possible.

Maybe they’re famous, maybe idols?

A small excitement sparked at that thought, but I was still daunted by the scene playing out in front of me. If they were idols, I felt incredibly sorry for them. This was a clear breach of privacy and personal space, and they didn’t deserve it at all. This was the reason for hatred against K-pop fandoms all around the world.

“Who do they think they are?” I found myself muttering, eyebrows furrowing in disappointment.

Suddenly, the more brightly dressed man glanced around and pointed directly at my car, turning to his well-built friend to shout something following a flurry of gestures. I stiffened and my breath hitched when both started sprinting towards me, their fans following desperately to try and at least touch them.

Oh no.

My breathing sped up and the situation finally dawned on me. The empty mall, the shady name and blunt text response. The timing…

I unlocked all my doors and gripped the wheel harder, if that was even possible. The mass of people followed the two guys as they drew closer to my car, and I prayed to God that they didn’t leave any scratches or dents by the time I was gone. The one that acknowledged me first reached the car, and I jumped slightly when he opened the passenger door and clambered in swiftly. The other darkly dressed one threw himself in the backseat next and I jumped again when both doors slammed shut simultaneously.

“Hello!” The first guy cleared his throat from where he sat next to me and I could see he was bouncing his knee in apprehension, obviously wanting to scoot the fuck out of there, but still trying to be polite towards me. His breathing was shallow, and I could see large beads of sweat rolling down the side of his half-hidden face. I was in no mood to sit around and ponder about him.

“To hell with this!” I exclaimed with a squeak, and the second after the passenger door closed I shifted the gearstick and floored the pedal. Making sure that no people were in my way before skidding slightly around the pick-up bend. Only the sound of one singular hand slapping the boot of my car made me wince, but I was glad there was no other physical contact on my precious red Hyundai.

Only the sound of laboured breathing could be heard amongst sighs of relief as we pulled away from the mall. I looked into the rear-view mirror to see some people giving a hearty chase down the road, but most of the fans had broken away and were just waving towards my car as we rolled down the street.

Adrenaline was pumping through my veins, and I could feel a small smile resting on my face at the thought of escaping something like that. What a turn of events for this tedious day! A muffled gasp caught my attention and I looked into my mirror again to see the darkly dressed guy’s eyes screwed shut as he laughed breathlessly, one hand slapping his knee. His friend was just leaning his head back against the headrest as he gulped in large breaths of oxygen through his plump lips. They had both pulled down their masks and lifted their shaded glasses to catch their breaths, but the sight caused my own eyes to widen dangerously.

Holy shit on a stick, Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook are sitting in my car. What in the ever-loving…

My breathing hitched at the realisation, but I continued to drive steadily. The thing I needed to focus on most of all was getting away from the crazy population of the city. I knew internally I was freaking out a little at the thought of members of my favourite boyband sitting in my own car, but I kept it under wraps knowing they would definitely not appreciate another bout of whatever that shemozzle was before.

I guess nothing goes unnoticed when you’re that famous. Why the hell were they alone?

Jungkook stopped laughing as he looked at my wide-eyed and slightly terrified expression. He suddenly grew apologetic due to his unexplained laughing.

“Sorry, uh, just how you drove off… sorry.” His voice died down as he gradually started to regain his composure, and I watched a shy demeanour suddenly take over his form, as if he had been hit with a realisation of overstepping his bounds. Jimin just turned and glanced pointedly at him, and then back at me to search wearily for a response.

“No it’s fine, I’m just a tad shaken,” I huffed out an exasperated breath, amusement showing on my features at the maknae’s sudden behaviour change. The idol next to me cleared his throat as I turned another corner, luckily no traffic barred my way and I was easily able to fly down the main road.

“We’re very sorry for what happened back there, that was probably quite troublesome for you. We apologise for the inconvenience.”

“Seriously don’t worry. You guys definitely needed an escape from…that. I’m glad to help, honestly.” I smiled to ease any worry radiating from the two flustered boys. “J, right?”

I glanced upwards into the mirror to lock eyes with Jungkook, not missing the way Jimin tried to conceal a smirk from the younger member. “Ah, he’s not that creative with names it seems.”

The older boy’s melodic speaking voice caused my lips to part in an involuntary breath of awe. I had always loved Park Jimin’s voice, whether it be singing or speaking or doing literally anything. Jungkook’s amused exhale and gentle chuckle also made me quite soft.

“Ah, sorry about my rude message too.” He looked downwards and bowed slightly. I noticed how politely he spoke and my insides turned to jelly once again. I felt warm and fluffy from their pleasant mannerisms.

“Don’t worry guys, how could I expect an essay when you were running for your lives?”

The two boys couldn’t contain their amused smiles as they exchanged another glance, seemingly conflicted. I could tell they didn’t know quite what to do with themselves in this situation, as they surely seldom had to get rides from anyone else other than their own personal drivers. I saw Jimin’s brows crease in concentration next to me, as if he was trying to figure out how to maintain his sense of professionalism. His hands fidgeted with the hem of his shirt anxiously.

“You guys may want to start with an explanation, if that’s alright?” I decided to help them out a small bit. If I could establish a comfortable atmosphere here, it would be much easier to converse and work out what to do.

“I notice that you put the next street over as your destination, but I’m fairly sure you’d both want to go further than that.” I made my point with a raised eyebrow and gestured to my phone sitting on the dashboard, destination showing clearly across the bottom of the screen.

Jimin clicked his tongue and leant in to read my phone more clearly. My skin tingles at his closer proximity.

“Seriously Jungkookie, any other place would’ve been better,” he eventually spoke, and although his tone was whiny with complaint, I could see the traces of a smile dancing across his features. He was obviously trying his best to remain stern.

“Ah, sorry hyung. I didn’t have all that much time in this case, did you forget?”

The cheek of this boy.

Jimin turned around and pointed at the younger boy while failing to hold back a giggle.

“Oi, show some respect you brat.”

Jungkook was snickering to himself, and I couldn’t help the smirk from tugging at my lips involuntarily. The group these guys came from always had this certain dynamic of playful teasing that won over so many fans. I included myself in that list honestly, as I always managed to have a good laugh watching their energetic interactions. It made me feel so youthful, as though an inner child would come out to play even though I was still adolescent at the age of 22.

They were fine joking around with themselves for a bit, but I could tell they were still very conscious of me and my presence in the car. They stopped chuckling and Jungkook cleared his throat noticeably in the back, silently handing over the responsibility of the situation to his elder.

“Um, sorry about that as well,” Jimin began to launch into a heartfelt apology, his bouncy blonde hair lowering with his head in a meaningful bow. I stopped him softly with a smile and made steady eye contact for a couple of seconds. His oak-brown eyes were confused, and I knew he was trying his best to deal with the situation properly. Just as his leader would.

“It’s fine, no more apologies please,” I requested warmly, easing the tension as he leant backwards in his seat to relax.

“I just want to know how you both ended up there, if you don’t mind sharing that is. Also feel free to give me somewhere to drop you both off.”

Jimin glanced over at me once more as if calculating my chances of being a threat. I made sure to keep my expression calm and clear while focusing on the empty road in front of me.

“Do you know us?” the sudden question from behind caused Jimin’s head to snap backwards, and my heartbeat to speed up incredibly. It wasn’t an accusing tone Jungkook used, but more on the curious side. Jimin still showed slight disapproval before turning his gaze back to me, a newfound curiosity also flashing across his features. It seemed he became a little shy after the topic of their fame rolled around, but I could tell he still wanted to know pretty badly.

“I’d consider myself a pretty big fan, not insane but you get what I mean,” I managed to force out, swallowing the lump in my throat at the thought of explaining my admiration for them.

They were literally sitting in my car and I never thought I would be shy, but here I was with an embarrassed blush alighting across my face. Jimin widened his eyes next to me, his mouth parting slightly in his shock. Jungkook inhaled a sharp breath before letting out another hearty chuckle.

“Wow! I never would have known.”

“Neither, I guess you must not be as emotional as many ARMY are when they see us,” Jimin smiled at the thought, and it was easy to say he didn’t mean anything bad by the comment.

“I’m just here to do my job. I’m not usually one to express my emotions that intensely, but I’ll let you both know that you’ve made my entire day.”

I saw Jimin turn his radiant smile towards me with an abashed sound falling from his lips. “Thank you, you’ve done so much for us already. Thank you for rescuing us.”

I saw him throw a questioning glance at Jungkook, who in turn squinted his doe-like eyes in confusion.

“It’s (Y/n). You can use honorifics if you want, but I don’t care much for them,” I explained softly, easing his sudden bout of guilt for not even knowing my name.

“Ah, thanks once again (Y/n)-ssi.”

Both of the boys were nervous, as they had just learned that I was a fan and were probably expecting me to flip out on them at any given moment. I knew Jungkook was shy around girls especially, but even he was kind of uncharacteristically silent in the back.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to freak out on you,” I assured them, keeping my eyes fixated on the road with a mostly amused expression. “I’m curious as to why you guys were alone with no protection out there. That usually doesn’t seem to happen.”

“No, definitely not,” Jimin sighed and I heard Jungkook hum in agreement.

“We didn’t mean to get separated from the others, we were all meant to just be shopping,” Jungkook huffed, and I could tell the young man was still shaken from his escapade from the mall. His large dark eyes were still slightly widened from the adrenaline spike.

“Yeah, everyone was together, and then we weren’t. Then the fans appeared and all we could do was run. Jungkook had to download Uber and make an account and everything on the spot. Lucky you were there because our drivers weren’t going to be around until a few more hours,” Jimin provided, his voice rough and raspy with weariness and relief. I could tell the shorter member was finally beginning to relax in the presence of the vehicle.

“Shit, I gotta call the Boss!” Jimin whipped out his phone and groaned when he discovered a couple of missed calls from his manager already.

I gave him a nod to let him know he could make the call safely. I wouldn’t record it or anything shady like that, I respected them too much and it wasn’t in my nature at all. Jimin gazed over a final time before finally deciding to place his full trust in me. I was already driving the car he was hitching a ride in, so trust honestly couldn't have mattered less when both of their lives were pretty much already cradled in my hands.

“I’d like to thank you as well (Y/n)-ssi, you really did save us back there,” Jungkook commented quietly as he leaned forward so I could hear. Neither of us wanted to interrupt Jimin as he fell into a heated discussion with his manager, or possibly Namjoon from the sounds of his replies over the phone.

“It’s okay Jungkookie, I know you guys deserve a much-needed break after all that. Sit back and enjoy the ride is all I'll say,” I said with a sigh, and finally decided to relax as well by releasing the tension in my muscles to sit more comfortably. I noticed Jungkook smirk cutely at the nickname accidently slipping out, and was just glad that he didn’t find it inappropriate.

“No, I swear she’s fine. She won’t do anything like that hyung,” Jimin’s suddenly louder response caused my smile to drop and my eyes to swivel around to the blonde boy. His temperament had grown agitated and I could see he was having difficulty trying to convince his managers and group leader. His round cheeks were blown out in exasperation, and I could clearly read the worry flitting across his expression.

“Jimin-ssi, if he wants to talk to me he can,” I offered softly so I didn’t spook him, raising my eyebrows in encouragement. We’d travelled a fair way, so pulling over was an option even though it was probably still too dangerous to linger in one place for long.

“No thanks it’s fine, I do trust you.” Jimin shook his head and I couldn’t help but smile at his kind, yet stubborn nature. These boys had no idea who I was, yet they put their faith in me and my driving ability for longer than they even needed to.

Jimin finished up with his call after another few minutes of stressed reassuring.

“Um, (Y/n)-ssi? I have an address I need to put in. If that’s okay.” He turned to me after letting out an explosive sigh, and I nodded towards the phone resting on the dashboard.

“Go ahead, distance isn't an issue.”

Jimin smiled at my response and shyly reached forward for my phone, still trying to be respectful.

“Hyung said it would be ideal if you dropped us off somewhere nearby the dorms so there’s no suspicion, but apparently all nearby areas are swarming with fans trying to figure out what’s going on.”

“Shit,” I breathed, the full realisation dawning on me. If their fans found out who I was, I wouldn’t be left alone for a while. I could imagine receiving threats and loads of unwanted attention, possibly not even being able to leave my house for a few days at the very least.

“So, you’ll have to drop us at the actual dorms then.”

“What?” I questioned in an instant. That sounded like the dumbest thing I’d ever heard.

“Isn’t that the area where most of the fans would be?”

“Well, most likely, but there's security.” Jimin ran a hand down his face as if trying to rub away the sudden bout of stress brought on, and I could fathom just how tired he was from all the rambunctious disorder.

“Why not drive you somewhere far away and get your driver to pick you up or something?”

“I did suggest that, but they just want us back as soon as possible so they can calm everyone down. I don’t mean to be rude, but they can’t exactly know or predict what you’ll do.”

That definitely made sense. Watching another car pull out of the building might also cause the fans to suspect the worst. They could even believe that I kidnapped the two band members instead of saving them. Well, that and there was absolutely no reason for their company to trust me with two of their idols that much.

“Okay, but one of you lend me a mask or something. I’m not going in there with a death wish.”

Jungkook chuckles from the back seat, and I’m slightly startled due to not hearing from the younger boy for a while.

“You’re right though, here you can use mine. I have my hoodie anyway.” A hand appeared next to me holding a familiar black mask, the faint but fragrant smell of a rare cologne wafting around me at the action. Of course, anything he’s worn would smell this expensive. Seeing how normal they can act, it’s hard to remember just how rich they actually are.

“Thanks.” I slipped on the mask and the smell was now stronger. I almost swooned.

“It’s actually not as far as I thought,” I commented when the map displayed the route to take. I knew the traffic was most likely to be more congested in this area than the city mall was before, so I decided to take a couple of back routes.

“Good plan,” Jungkook piped in with a nod and I saw the excited grin plastered on his face.

“What are you so happy about?” Jimin scoffed with a raised brow.

“I dunno, just this whole thing is so… exciting? Nothing like this has ever happened before,” Jungkook replied while trying to smother his grinning, but failing miserably.

“True, you guys would usually be living a careful life, right?” I decided to join in. Jimin and Jungkook didn’t seem to be shy or guarded around me as much as they were, but I knew they were still keeping face amongst all the drama.

“Of course, we don’t want our precious fans to worry about us,” Jimin went on in a level tone, his hand flying up to emphasise his point. I still couldn’t get over how captivating his voice sounded in person, and how it was this close to me...

“Speaking of fans, you’re an ARMY?” Jungkook’s cheeky lilt gained my attention and caused me to look up and lock eyes with him in the rear-view mirror.

“What of it?”

I try to suppress my sharp exhale of amusement, but fail miserably as well. Kookie’s adorable expression of playful confidence, bordering on egotistical even, made the laughter bubble up.

“Well, obviously you’d have a favourite, a bias.”

The question causes me to now laugh loudly, smacking the wheel once.

“Ah, I should’ve seen this coming honestly.”

Jimin clicked his tongue at his junior band member. “As if it matters.”

His voice is also playful, and I can tell he’s just as curious as the maknae by how he looks across at me with raised eyebrows and a small knowing smirk adorning his full lips. They were both taking this as a joke, and I was not going to be any different.

“Of course it matters Jimin, this is the question that decides my fate,” I feigned offense, and watched as his smile caused his eyes to disappear in the cutest, squishiest way imaginable.

Before I could say anything else, an embarrassed blush swarmed my cheeks as I spluttered, “Oh crap, I forgot the honorific.”

“Its fine,” Jimin assured. “You mentioned you don’t care for them before, so I can live without it.”

I smirked at him and shook my head slightly. “You’re actually too nice.”

His melodious chuckle was then interrupted by the mischievous maknae in the back.

“Hey, don’t change the subject hyung. Who’s your favourite member (Y/n)?” I noticed he took instant advantage of the honorific drop, and almost slipped an amused snort.

“Well it’s not either of you, that’s for sure.”

I knew they could tell there was a certain level of sarcasm in my tone, but they still let out varying noises of defeat.

“What, no way. It must be Jin-hyung then,” Jungkook groaned and I couldn't contain a giggle. His narcissistic nature was showing, and this time I wasn’t even sure if it was a joke or not. Jimin chose to pipe in as well, obviously enjoying the mystery that was my ‘supposed Bangtan bias’.

“Nah, I reckon it’s Tae. She’s weird enough to be a perfect match for him.”

Oh my, he really went there.

Both of the boy’s breath hitched, as if they thought I was going take offense and kick them out on the curb.

“Honestly, if you think Tae’s weird then I’m a whole other level. Although I guess I can never know who you guys are behind the screen.”

Jimin visibly relaxed after hearing me take the joke, but then grew serious again after my last comment.

“We’re fairly genuine to our fans, as much as we can be,” He defended, but wasn’t insulted. Jungkook nodded in agreement from the back, still smiling from the joking around that happened before.

“Of course, that’s why you’re one of my favourite groups, but you have to admit it is kind of impossible for someone like me to make a judgement on someone I’ve never met.”

“That is true, I guess. We really do try hard for you guys. I never thought super hard about that,” Jimin looked upwards as he pondered, and I felt proud that I’d gotten more than enough glimpses of both their true natures just from this simple car ride. Though, realistically they could be phenomenal actors and I wouldn’t know any different.

“We may be one of your favourite groups, but I’m still waiting for the member~,” Jungkook started lowly from the back, his sentence breaking off into his famous high pitched giggle when he saw my deadpan expression staring him down in the mirror. Jimin joined in and I sighed in defeat.

“Okay. I don’t have one.”

There’s a small silence, but both boys explosively let out sounds of understanding.

“Ah, you’re one of those.”

I was about to question what Jimin meant, but Jungkook cut me off.

“I was just about to pin her as a Yoongi stan.”

The sudden and serious statement made me cackle, although the sound was muffled by the black fabric of the mask over my mouth.

“Oh boy, you have absolutely no idea. My best friend…” I trailed off as laughter gripped me, almost causing me to veer off the road uncontrollably.

“Jesus Christ, watch out!” Jimin breathlessly squeaked as he made a grab for the wheel to steady the moving car. I gripped the wheel harder in fear, but amusement washed over me once again.

“Hyung did your voice just-”

“Shut up.”

I couldn’t stop the amused snort, but managed to regain control. My chuckles were now borderline wheezes, and I could hear Kookie in the back sharing the same demise.

“As I was saying,” I began, but erupt once more as the memory of Jimin’s voice crack surfaced back to the front of my mind. Jungkook is in shambles, but Jimin is just sitting with his head buried in his hands next to me, shoulders shaking as he tries to avoid his inevitable embarrassment.

“Stoooop.” He drawled it out and reached behind him to smack the chortling maknae on the knee somewhat harshly. I knew he hated the fact that he just got embarrassed in front of some stranger, who had also been established as a pretty avid fan. Poor Chim.

“You forget I’ve seen videos of your many embarrassments,” I offered in between chuckles, and caught the moment his face scrunched up in an adorable cringe. A sigh of defeat fell from his lips. “Yeah, I give up.”

He still chuckled and shook his head, the tinkling sounds causing me to bring a hand up to clutch my chest dramatically. Both boys laughed cutely once again at my reaction, Jimin’s eyes disappearing as he covered his face with one small hand.

“You sure you’re not a Jimin stan, noona?” Jungkook chimes in. I raised a brow and decided to skilfully avoid the question.

“Ah, so you picked up that I’m older than you?”

Jungkook stopped, his jaw going slack at the sudden question, and I found myself face to face with his widely memed blankness instead. I almost can’t contain myself.

“Oh, yeah maybe? It kind of actually just slipped out.”

I find myself giggling at the return of his shy persona, and he smiled bashfully at the floor in response. His tongue pushed out one of his cheeks in shame.

“Yah, don’t assume such a thing,” Jimin chuckled, obviously grateful that the heat was finally off of him.

“Don’t worry, I’m the same age as Jiminie I believe,” I decided to help the poor boy out, craning my neck forward to check the next turn off for oncoming cars.

We were actually almost to the destination, and the trip had flown by way too quickly. After Jungkook made a noise of comprehension, Jimin looked around suddenly and grunted in surprise.

“Crap, I was meant to call Namjoonie back a few minutes ago.”

“What are you doing hyung?” Jungkook chided in flippant scolding, to which Jimin responded with another angered slap. He brought out his phone and dialled a number quickly, obviously not concerned that I could very well easily read and memorise it in two seconds flat.

As If I would anyway.

I fell silent as Jimin waited for the phone call to connect.

 Jungkook 3rd person POV

 Jungkook also waited, breathless at the thought of how dire the situation was to their careers as a whole. This was such a strange occurrence to the famous band members, and he thought about how normal and relaxed the car ride had actually been when compared to how awkward they thought it was going to turn out.

When Jungkook had made the Uber request originally, he and Jimin were prepared to face the worst. Anyone who had the opportunity to drive a car unsupervised with two famous idols in tow could easily turn the tables and expose them more, or maybe even do worse things…

He shook his head at the thought and silently swallowed the bile rising in his throat. He glanced over to your form sitting in the driver’s seat, stiffened slightly due to the very important call being made.

You had been nothing but kind and understanding so far, not to mention hilariously easy going. Jungkook found himself respecting you immediately. You could have freaked out and demanded autographs or photos from them at any time. You could have decided to not drop them off where they wanted and just continued to drive for eternity. You could have even taken them anywhere you wanted to, but no, you listened to them, respected their privacy and even agreed to risk your reputation to drive them into their dorms where countless fangirls could eat you alive if they found out.

You were just amazing, and Jungkook knew his hyung felt similarly. Well, considering how he defended you without question before when Namjoon probably jumped to conclusions, it was evident that Jimin trusted you too.

Jungkook was completely numb from bewilderment. Everything could have gone wrong for them in their haste to escape the mob of their excited fans, but it didn’t, and it was all thanks to you.

These types of people drive our purpose, we’re so happy to have reached you.

Although if he was honest, he wouldn't mind at all if you got all flustered and cute while gushing over him. Just a little bit.

 Reader 1st person POV

 I watched as Jimin jerked the phone away from his ear suddenly, a loud voice booming loudly through the tiny speaker to reach even my ears. Jimin’s face winced as he brought the phone back to his ear hesitantly.

“We’re so sorry for the mess Sir, but it worked out.”

I knew that he was most likely talking to his manager or director with how his language changed. He ruffled his blonde hair anxiously and continued to listen to the voice on the line, eventually digging his teeth into his bottom lip in another bout of anxiety.

“Wait, we’re almost to the dorms, she’s got a mask on and everything-” Jimin was cut off and my eyes darted in between him and the road ahead to try and figure out what was happening. His breathing sped up and I could see his own eyes meeting mine a few times worriedly.

What is going on?

We were getting close to the dorms, and I had already noticed how the housing had become wealthier the more I drove through the city. The streets were becoming beautiful and cleaner. I knew that the boys lived in most likely the richest place in the city, and this place was by far the definition of that.

One thing I also noticed is that there were a few groups of girls dotted here and there that were walking or sitting around the footpaths. Some even saw my car and started pointing and taking photos while jumping up and down.

“Well, there goes my anonymity.” I sighed and slumped further in my seat, as if to hide my face better than it was already hidden. The only sound as I drove onwards was Jimin’s occasional reply into the phone next to me. His responses were becoming less worried, but still sounded unenthusiastic.

“Yes, I understand, okay I’ll tell her,” Jimin murmured and I held my breath at the sound of the call being hung up. My curiosity was nothing short of burning, and I instantly turned to the blonde boy when he looked at me pointedly.

“Um, our manager needs you to come in with us so you can speak with him and sign some stuff.”

I look forward again and nod once in understanding. “Yeah, I knew this would most likely happen. Confidentiality, right?”

I crack a smile at the thought of actually going in and meeting the famous Bang Sihyuk, CEO and founder of Bighit Entertainment.

“Wow,” I breathed after fully wrapping my head around what was happening.

“I guess you never thought this would happen.” Jungkook chuckled from the backseat, and I scoffed in disbelief.

“Yeah it’s not every day you meet two members of Bangtan and their producer.”

The sarcasm was heavy, and the two boys grinned in amusement. Jimin leant forwards to rest his forehead on the dashboard in a weary manner. “Ah, I’m so sorry for forcing you into this mess (Y/n)-ssi.”

“What did I say about apologising? I love you guys and your music; this is the least I can do to repay you for all the happiness you have brought me.” My voice became emotional and quiet as I let out all my pent-up feelings. I didn’t know how exactly I could express my bundling thoughts into formed words, but I felt as though that might have been just enough to let them know how ecstatic I truly was that this miracle had happened to me.

“You must be an angel,” Jimin smiled at me so sweetly and genuinely that I had to rip my gaze away from him in order to prevent tearing up. I heard Jungkook sigh in awe at my words, and I looked up to see him smiling shyly at the ground before glancing forward.

“Devoted fans like you are the reason we have made it this far, (Y/n).”

Jimin turns his head and gives Jungkook a look that says 'Well that was fucking sappy' but I can’t help but smile wider and let out a tiny gleeful squeak unknowingly.

His words had caused my emotions to storm again, and I was so fortunate to hear them in person that I didn’t even know what to do with myself. I gripped the wheel tighter so I wouldn’t let go and do anything stupid. Since I had my mask on, they could only see my smile through how my eyes and cheeks bunched up, but unfortunately the mask wasn’t large enough to cover my entire face.

“Awe you’re so cute when you blush like that!” Jimin laughed loudly, reaching out to poke my reddening skin. I gasped and knocked his hand away softly with one of my own.

“Leave me alone, I can’t control it or anything.”

Jungkook was also sniggering in the back, his cheeky nature making a comeback as I shook my head to try and rid myself of the heat.

“Sorry for that noona.”  

Now he was using the word to tease me, and I fought the urge to slap him like Jimin did before. “Silly boy, I swear you’ll never make me blush again.”

“You sure about that? I’ll accept the challenge.”

“And we’re here!” I dragged out the first word to hopefully try and cut him off. I could still hear him giggling in the back, his knowing smile holding an impish quality.

The sight before me was spectacular, if that was even enough to sum it up. The area in which BTS lived was absolutely breathtaking, and I knew that this was in fact one of the, if not the richest place in all of Seoul.

The gardens were marvellously well grown and maintained, while the architecture seemed to gleam and glow in the sunlight, too perfectly constructed to be true. Modern was also an understatement, as this place seemed borderline futuristic. To describe it in one word, glorious.

“I don’t even know if someone like me should go in there,” I stammered, my voice cracking multiple times in sheer astonishment.

“Don’t be silly, how else are we gonna get in there?” Jimin joked and I snorted lightly at his change of demeanour.

“Walk, silly.” I shared a cheeky glance with the maknae behind me when Jimin gasped.

“Rude, and here I thought you were a fan?”

“I’m joking Jimin, alright how do we actually do this?” I looked around and saw a parking space out the front of the main building. Jimin gestured towards it and nodded, giving me the go to proceed.

There were no fans lurking around this place due to the security, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to escape any photographers if they were there. Luckily we had only a few brief, yet concerning encounters with the fans while driving in to the complex itself.

If Kookie hadn’t given me the mask I would be dead meat cooking on a spit. 

I parked the car carefully and fell back into my seat with a sigh. Jimin and Jungkook eyed me with concern clouding their features.

“We’re so-”

“Park Jimin, will you eventually heed my words?” I tilted my head and blinked rapidly at him with a smile on my face. He sees my playful, yet tired expression and shakes his head with an annoyed groan.

“I probably will never stop apologising for the trouble we’ve caused.”

I sighed again and exaggerated a pout, borderline mockery if you will. Jungkook let out a huff and a click of his tongue indicated the long-awaited comeback of his cocky attitude.

“Come on hyung, she already said it doesn’t matter.”

His tone caused Jimin to narrow his eyes towards the back accusingly, and I watched as the younger member sat back down, satisfied with the reaction.

“Thank you maknae,” I rolled my eyes and suppressed a chuckle at his scoff, catching Jimin’s amused and appreciative look. I observed around one more time before turning my gaze upwards to glance at the building next to us.

“Okay it’s now or never boys, run and don’t look back.”

            Copyright © 2020 by salade. All rights reserved.

[writer-k-pop]

Fire Fights

난 단지 네가 다치는 것을 원하지 않았을 뿐이야. I just didn’t want you to get hurt.

Description: You and Namjoon have been friends for ages. Both being fire benders and all. Even though you don’t run in the same circles anymore, he’s always around. And now he’s saving you when some fire benders decide to pick on Jungkook, your water bending friend. Which leads to an argument that reveals someone’s true feelings.  Warnings: Swearing Genre: Angst, Fluff, Bender!AU, FireBender!Namjoon x Fem!Reader Word Count: 2.7k

BTS Masterlist | Masterlists

"Late. Again." My professor, Mrs. Kwon, eyes the few students who slink into the classroom 15 minutes late. She sighs before continuing the lesson. "Alright, back to water properties."

Her voice begins to fade as I zone out, staring at the projector screen.

Jungkook, sitting next to me, discreetly nudges my shoulder to bring me out of my trance.

I turn to him a give him a "what was that for?" look.

"New slide." He whispers, nodding towards the screen.

I look at the screen and sure enough, Jungkook is correct. I quickly start to write down the notes before Mrs. Kwon moves on to the next.

"Alright, any questions?" Mrs. Kwon asks 25 minutes later.

A silence blankets over the classroom and it feels like no one is breathing.

Mrs. Kwon nods, "Well, that's all I had planned for today. Remember that the first drafts of your research essays are due by the end of next week. You can make an appointment with me if you want to check your work before the due date." She reminds us over the noise of students packing up their belongings.

I roll my eyes at the impatience of some (most) students.

"Have a good weekend!" Mrs. Kwon finishes and begins to pack up her own papers.

Once she's done talking, students' conversation grow in volume in a matter of seconds and I start packing away my belongings.

"I'm torn." Jungkook sighs as I sling my backpack over my shoulder.

"About what?" I question and we begin climbing the steps towards the lecture hall's exits.

"What to write the research paper on." Jungkook ponders.

I widen my eyes at him, "You haven't decided that yet? That was supposed to be done like a week ago."

Jungkook shrugs, "I kind of want to use the paper I wrote for the 302 class I took last year."

I shake my head, "I never understood why you decided to take this 205 class when you've already taken the 302 AND you're a water bender."

"You said you wanted to take it and not be alone." Jungkook defends his choice, "Plus, it fills a credit and it's interesting taking the class with a bunch of fire benders." He playfully winks at me and holds the door open.

"Are we that fascinating to you?" I glance at me as we walk out towards the main courtyard. In the center, the central column spews fire up towards the sky.

"Fascinating enough." Jungkook replies, "Like why do you guys need a very large candle in the middle of your campus?"

I smack his shoulder and he laughs. "You guys have that peeing sculpture in the middle of yours so hush."

"Alfred is not a peeing sculpture." Jungkook gasps and holds a hand over his heart in offense.

I chuckle, "Sure looks like one."

Jungkook and I became good friends through my other good friend Jin, who's also a water bender. Jin and I have been friends since childhood. As a fire-bender and water-bender, we balanced each other out fairly well and never could quite defeat the other.

Though, Jin's got a girlfriend now so we don't see him around as much.

"Hey, what the hell do you think you're doing here?" A cocky female voice calls out to us.

I roll my eyes before turning to my left to face the all too familiar group of people. Sitting on benches and standing around are the most popular kids in school. But not the cool, kind populars. No, these are the populars who have all of daddy's money stuffed in unmentionable places. The worst kind.

"I go to class here, Elsie." I yell back in hopes that they'll be feeling nice and let Jungkook and I pass. But my hopes, as always, are crushed.

"Not you, hush puppy." Elsie says with boredom then her nods towards Jungkook, "I was talking to the wet one."

My fist clenches but Jungkook rests a hand on my wrist before I can move.

"I have a class here. You may have heard of it. W205?" Jungkook responds calmly.

"Lame." Elsie rolls her eyes and her pose giggles. "Why don't you stick to your campus from now on? Hm? We wouldn't want a poor wet one to get burned by fire now would we?" She cocks her head to the side and I want to wipe the smack the pout from her lips.

"Not unless I drowned you first." I suddenly say without a second thought and release my arm from Jungkook's grasp. "Is that a challenge?" Elsie asks with a wicked smile and takes a step forward.

"We're not fully trained so water fighting fire would be a little unfair don't you think?" I explain, "But fire fighting fire seems more fair, doesn't it?"

"Since you're a girl, I might actually be tested on my true abilities." Elsie rests her hands on her hips, her confidence soaring. "Though, I don't know if you could keep up."

The blood in my veins boils and it takes literally everything within me to not charge at her right this second.

"I bet I could." I reply, both fists now balled.

"I'm sure you could." Elsie nods, "In 3 years."

I roll my eyes and drop my backpack, "Will you stop talking and actually get your ass over here to find out?"

"What are you doing?" Jungkook whispers, "You almost got suspended last time."

"I don't care." I look back at him.

"(y/n)!" Elsie calls out to me, "Catch." She simply says before sending a fire ball but not at me. At Jungkook.

With speed, I step in front of the attack and disperse the flame with ease.

"ELSIE!" Namjoon's voice booms from some yards away. His voice and presence drags both of our attentions to him as he strides over.

Namjoon is one of those cool, kind popular kids and he commands the attention and respect from almost everyone on our campus. And he just so happens to be my best friend. I always question why he's still my friend when we are barely even in the same friend circles anymore but every time I start to miss him or need him, he shows up. Just like that.

Part of me is relieved he's here so she'll leave us alone but the other part of me is upset that Namjoon's stopping me from finally teaching her the lesson she deserves. He's like an angel appearing at just the right time but at the same time, he's Satan's spawn just loving that he's messing with my life.

"What the hell is your problem?" Namjoon questions her with anger when he reaches her.

"Oh, Namjoon, how are you?" Elsie dodges the question with a sweet smile.

"Just answer the question." Namjoon instructs with a no-play tone.

Elsie rolls her eyes before answering, "The water bender was bothering me."

"Exactly how was he bothering you?" Namjoon asks, crossing his arms over his chest.

Elsie looks taken aback then stutters, "Well, I mean he, he was just-"

Namjoon curtly nods once, "Water benders are allowed to take classes on other campuses. Worry about your own self." He then turns and walks towards Jungkook and I while Elsie and her crew walk away.

Jungkook picks up my backpack and hands it to me just as Namjoon reaches the two of us.

"Are you guys okay?" He asks, glancing between the two of us. When we both nod, he says, "What the hell were YOU thinking?" Checking on me before launching into a scolding, as expected of my best friend. "Why would you instigate her like that?"

"I could've handled her fine." I roll my eyes, now more annoyed he interrupted. "I could've shown her a damn lesson or two."

"In the middle of the day in the middle of the courtyard?" Namjoon continues to question me.

"It would've been fine." I repeat and start walking out of the campus.

"You would've been actually suspended this time." Namjoon follows with Jungkook next to him.

"That's what I said." Jungkook pipes up.

"You should've listened to that." Namjoon finishes with me then turns to Jungkook. "And why didn't you stop her? You could've dragged her away."

Jungkook raises his hands in surrender, "I tried. I swear., But you know how she gets when she gets into that mood."

"It wasn't a mood." I defend myself.

"Fine, attitude then." Jungkook corrects himself, sticking out his tongue at me.

"It was not a-"

"Enough." Namjoon pinches the bridge of his nose. "Just, just walk away next time. Please?"

"What and let Ms. Made-Perfect-by-Daddy's-Money continue to berate the other elements like that?" I raise my eyebrows at Namjoon. "Like hell I would let that happen."

Namjoon sighs, "Verbally fight with her, throw around threats, sure. But just don't actually fight her."

I let out a puff of air in disbelief, "You don't think I could actually fight her and hold my own, do you?"

Now, quite annoyed with my best friend, I turn Jungkook in a random direction. "I'll see you later Namjoon." I say before he can explain himself.

Nearly pushing Jungkook, we make our way in the opposite direction.

"You do know that we have to go back in that direction and not this direction." Jungkook mentions as he starts walking on his own.

"We're taking the long way around." I spew out the words, my tone immediately telling him not to argue with me.

--------------The Next Morning----------------

The wind blows past my shoulders and makes my paper flutter as they stay locked to my binder. The mid-morning sun is warm but not too hot and the wind gives a nice relief.

I decided to study on the roof this morning because my room got way too stuffy last night and because no one's out here in the morning so it's nice and quiet.

I live in an apartment building and the owners were nice enough to purchase a few picnic tables up here since so many of us tenants are students. Cool people.

"You're still annoyed with me?" Namjoon's voice appears behind me.

I grip my pencil ever so slightly tighter, "Yeah, just a bit." I tell him without looking at him.

Without a word, he sits at the table a foot to my right.

I take a quick glance at him. He doesn't have his backpack and he's wearing black pants and a light washed denim jacket. He rests his arms on the table and is just staring straight ahead. Once I get a good look at him, I turn back to my notes but none of the written words register.

"The other day, what I said." Namjoon says, perking up my ears. "I didn't mean it that way."

I lift my head up and lay down my pencil, "Sure sounded like it."

"Well, it wasn't and if you would let me explain, you would see that." Namjoon turns to me, waiting for my answer.

I purse my lips and ponder his request, "Fine, what did you mean by saying that?" I ask him the question and meet his eyes.

He gives me a small smile, "Honestly, I do think you could take Elsie and you would handle yourself very well if it ever came down to a fire fight." I take the compliment but prepare for the largest but I would hear in my lifetime. "But... I just didn't want you to get hurt."

"You were worried about me getting hurt?" I raise my eyebrows slightly in confusion.

"Yeah, I didn't want to sit back and watch you get hurt if I could do something about it." Namjoon explains.

"Why would you care if I got hurt?" I question.

Namjoon suddenly gets flustered and rubs the back of his neck, "I mean, you know, you're my best friend and I'd hate to see that."

I squint my eyes at him, "Okay, but if that was true, you would've stopped me from doing all the other stupid things I've done with Jungkook. Most of which, by the way, you actually encouraged me to do."

"Those, those were different." Namjoon counters, "They were with Jungkook and you weren't fighting with fire."

I rest my head in my hand, "And I'm pretty sure I got injured much worse those times that I would've been had I been in-"

"I care about you, alright?" Namjoon blurts out. "Elsie's not worth the energy to fight and she's certainly not worth any injury, big or small."

My heart begins to pound and flutter at the same time. "I mean," I clear my throat, "I care about you too. You're my best friend."

Namjoon shakes his head with a smile playing on his lips, "No, I mean like more than best friends. I care about you a lot, (y/n)."

I stay silent, trying to process the words he's saying and he takes the silence as a signal to keep talking.

"Why do you think I'm always saving your ass from Elsie? Why do you think that I bring your favorite snacks around the time your periods is about to attack? Honestly, I'm quite tired of spitting out the same 'treat everyone equally' bullshit because I'd treat you better than everyone else."

My mind is racing through millions of thoughts at hundreds of miles an hour. I think I left my legs back in 'holy shit what is happening' land and my heart in 'holy shit this is actually happening' land.

"(y/n)?" Namjoon rests a hand on my shoulder, "Say something? It gets kind of weird if I'm the only one talking." He attempts to lighten the mood.

I register his words and now all the visits and hangouts and run ins make so much more sense. He didn't just randomly run into me or thought of me. He purposefully was where I always needed him to be. He was always there not because it was coincidence, but because he WANTED to be.

I run my hands through my hair and chuckle. "I am so dumb."

Now it's Namjoon's turn to be confused.

"How did I not see any of it?" I ask mainly myself.

Namjoon recovers from his confusion and shrugs his shoulders, "You were pretty focused on studying and not beating the crap out of Elsie."

I chuckle but it dies down pretty quickly. "All this time, huh?" I ask, looking at him.

Namjoon breathes in, "Yeah, all this time."

"Why didn't you say anything sooner?" I question.

"You said you were completely and utterly done with relationships so I was nervous to tell you that I liked you." Namjoon repeats my words from over a year ago and slides closer to me.

"You could've said something." I told him, nudging his shoulder.

"I could've." Namjoon says, "But I also watched the few guys who tried only to get shut down."

I laugh, "Point taken."

"So." He leans his head on his fist, facing me.

"So?" I repeat, questioningly.

"Have I been accepted or will I go join the rejects?" Namjoon clarifies.

I squeeze my eyes shut and mentally facepalm all while calling myself dumb for not catching onto that.

"I won't accept or reject you quite yet." I answer, "You still have to take me on a date. Then we'll see."

Namjoon lazily smiles, like he's already confident he won't be rejected. Which he's not entirely wrong. He's got a really nice face and his personality matches with mine and he *almost* always has me laughing. I would be lying if I said that I didn't have a suppressed crush that started years ago.

"You want a date. I can give you a date." Namjoon says and sits up straight. "Where should we go? And when?"

I smile, "Surprise me."

Namjoon smiles widely, now excited, "Oh, you got it." He raises from his seat, "I gotta run but tomorrow night. Be ready. I'll text you the time."

"Oh, okay." I reply, slightly surprised at how soon this date will be. "Hey, you didn't like plan for this did you?" I call out to him as he walks towards the door.

He pauses and turns around, "Maybe!" Namjoon calls back with a playful smile before continuing towards the door.

Once the door closes behind him and I'm left alone on the rooftop once more, all motivation to study jumps off the roof and all I can think about is the date I have tomorrow night with Namjoon, my best friend.

[hi-hey-haechan]

Self-Harm ~ Mark Lee

Disclaimer: If you are in anyway uncomfortable or triggered by mentions of depression or self-harm, I wouldn’t suggest reading this. Also, this is NOT in any way, intended to romanticize mental illness or self-harm. Love is not a magical cure for either of these. This is not an unfamiliar topic for me. I may not be a professional, but if anyone ever needs to talk to someone, feel free to message me or leave an ask. I’ll help. Always.

Pairing: Mark Lee x reader

Genre: Angst, it’s very sad

Word Count: 1.9K

Summary: Y/n, after trapped in a train of depressive, hopeless, worthless thoughts, attempts to escape her mind by hurting herself physically. However, later that day, her boyfriend Mark finds out.

Warnings: Mentions and description of self-harm and depression

The thoughts trickled in slowly, a small drizzle of negativity. A thought surfaced in your mind, and against your will, some part of you latched onto it. The painful words, images, and scenes in your mind became front and center in your brain. And that’s when the rainstorm came in. More negativity became to surround the central thought, every single word on the brink of your consciousness being a negative one. The rain poured down around you, driving you insane, everywhere you turned, being obscured by the rain, the pain within your mind, your soul. And just like that, you were drowning.

This pain ate away at you, toying with your sanity. You couldn’t even begin to comprehend what you were feeling. There was this pit in the middle of your chest, this dark, gaping hole of pain. It was as though every negative emotion you had ever experienced was screaming at you, horrible winds in your mental storm. You couldn’t understand if you were sad, angry, fearful, guilty, or resentful of yourself. Each of these emotions were ones that you felt with so much intensity, that they tangled together, becoming a giant ball of knots that you couldn’t take apart. You didn’t know what you were feeling. In your head, in your heart, you felt everything at once, the pain so blinding that it was numbing. You were so pained, to the point of numbness. The numbness ate a dark hole in your heart and created a lump in your throat.

This, of course, wasn’t an uncommon occurrence. You had dealt with this before. You dealt with it every day, in reality, some days more intense than others. There was comfort in your pain, at times. Worrying about something made you feel in control, as though your paranoia would prevent something from occurring. Happiness scared you. It was a fight with in your mind, these thoughts against your sanity. You’re fighting an internal battle, with no obvious point: the winner is already predetermined.

Mark’s positivity was a bright light in your life. His smile and laugh filled your heart, softening the tangle in the middle of your chest. Without realizing it, he was gentle with your feelings, his words to you therapeutic and warm. You wanted to be strong for him. Often times, you were: You held back your feelings when you needed to, and Mark’s arms were always there to embrace you when tears slipped down your face.

There were some days when you could hardly get out of bed. You dragged yourself through the endless cycle of days, a dark cloud hanging over your head. You wanted to get out. You needed out of your mind, and its dark thoughts that created a hurricane. You needed out of your body, which you loathed each time you looked in the mirror.

You cried. Of course, you did. What else could you do? When you felt enough intensity of one emotion, you managed to cry, your body wracking with sobs as searing-hot tears cut trails down your cheeks. You were a wreck, disgusted at yourself for crying over what you felt.

Then again, what did you feel? Worthlessness was prominent, for sure, side effects of dating an idol. He could have anyone in the world, but he chose you. This made you question why he would choose you. Mark could have chosen a girl with a different body type, and one in which she was fully secure. You felt he could have someone prettier, someone smarter and funnier and kinder and better. Despite his assurances of this being untrue, that he loved you with everything he had, you still felt this way. Your mind was trapped in this state.

At the same time, you were fearful. The weirdest phobias in the darkest parts of you were eating you alive, taking over your life slowly. At the same time, you lived in paranoia, always feeling unsafe and unprotected. You wanted to stop living every day in fear, but how could you, when it was a part of everything you did?

Did Mark make all of this go away? No, of course not. Not even close. Love wasn’t some magical cure for mental illness. However, his sweet ways of understanding you, and the way you smiled uncontrollably around him, most of the time, were what made the pain disappear for some time. Instead of pain being front and center in your mind, it would temporarily move to the back of it, giving you moments of peace. For some moments, your depression wasn’t always with you.

Depression. What an odd term. It was thrown around so much in society, commonized enough to be a simple emotion. It was used for attention, or even as an excuse for some actions. Depression was misunderstood, but those who didn’t understand it, still used the term without realizing its true meaning and power. This infuriated you. Depression was more than just temporary sadness. It was a dark cloud hanging over you 24/7, It was a mental illness that brought on feelings of constant hopelessness, helplessness, and worthlessness. This was something that impacted you day after day.

Mark knew about your depression, of course, and did everything in his power to help you. However, regarding your personal situation, he only knew as much as you told him, which really wasn’t much. Anything else he knew about it was based on his own observations. You constantly felt guilty, wondering if he wanted someone more mentally stable than you.

Thoughts built upon one another, one negative thought bringing on two new ones. Every depressing part of your life became front and center, forcing you to focus on pain, and pain only. You had to write up a report for work, but it remained half-written on your desk, the evils of your brain choosing to consume you instead.

You were desperate, in need of an escape. Everything was something you’d tried: stress eating, binge-watching Netflix or YouTube, reading, writing, sleeping...nothing worked. You were too far past that stage to even consider attempting one of those. It was impulsive, but you needed the escape. It felt like the only way.

Your safety pin was exactly where you had left it: Your bathroom cabinet, left in there just for emergencies: these kinds of emergencies. Settling yourself on the bathroom counter, you pulled off your socks -- thank goodness it was winter, so you had an excuse to wear socks, and you began to inflict pain upon yourself.

You scratched into your skin with the sharp, cold silver of the pin, seeing it flake away as the sting grew more prominent, moving the pin back and forth. The pain was a jolt in your entire being. You scratched the skin of your feet and ankles, for they were usually covered. What had once been skin were now small, angry lines, where blood had barely met the surface. They were painful. Hurting like hell, but were not enough to cause a large amount of blood, or mess, for that matter.

What did I just do? There was always that question after you’d attempted to reciprocate your mental pain with physical pain. Even if you cut, cut, and cut some more, it would never amount to the aching inside of your soul, brain, and heart.

Later that day, Mark had returned home. You two were changing for bed, and you slipped off your socks, having forgotten about the scratches on your feet and ankles from earlier (which hurt like hell whenever you put weight on that foot). You had grabbed your fuzzy socks and were changing into them, but you weren’t fast enough for Mark. Your seconds of forgetfulness lead to a consequence.

“Y/n?” Mark’s voice was small and quiet, sweet enough to almost move you to tears. He was looking right at your scratched-up foot.

You knew what he was looking at and referring to. Before he could say another word, you claimed, “It’s just from a cat in the park.” It was the first lie that came to mind.

“No, they aren’t.” His words were spoken plainly, without a doubt in his voice. He kneeled down and grabbed your foot, not daring to touch the cuts and hurt you further.

“Mark,” you said, your voice almost failing you, “stop.” It was a plea and an apology, broken with pain.

Your boyfriend stood up and sat on the bed next to you. “Why?” he inquired, and it sounded as though his voice had been ripped from his lungs, cracking in the process. Though you didn’t dare make eye contact with him, you knew he was crying.

“I’m sorry.” The words spilled from your lips as a whisper. A tear fell from your eye, landing on your hands, which had been balled up into fists on your lap. When Mark tried to grab your hand, you shrugged away his touch.

“You don’t need to apologize. You never need to apologize for being so hurt, that you do this to yourself.”

A sob escaped your throat, passing your lips against your will. You tipped your head down, trying to mask your cries, to no avail. Cries were ripped from your lungs, and you were blinded by the tears that continually welled up in your eyes, falling at a fast pace. A shattered “I’m sorry,” was all you could sob out, hardly able to breathe. This is me, you were kind of saying. This is broken Y/n.

Mark scrambled onto the bed and embraced your crumpled-over figure, which you couldn’t refuse. His body shook with silent cries against yours, and you hated yourself for this, for having broken him the way you did. “Y/n,” he sobbed out, and he sounded so broken that your heart shattered more. “My baby. Please,” His final word came out as a plead, and it spoke a thousand statements. It told you that he loved you. It told you that he was begging you to go to him, to confide in him, to let him help. It told you that he wanted this to stop, that he wanted you to be nothing but happy for the rest of your life.

Thousands of “I’m sorry”s came from your mouth, the utterance of your words barely audible, but Mark heard them perfectly.

“Why are you sorry? For feeling so low that you do this to yourself? That’s a cry for help. Why am I so stupid for only seeing this now?” He was blaming himself, and that broke you more, guilt becoming more prominent and lost in your tangle of feelings. You hated this. You hated that he saw you like this, weak and fragile, in your worst moments.

“I’m sorry that I’m not perfect for you--” you cried out, not in response to his words, but as a simple sentence that summed up everything you felt in that moment.

“You are! Y/n--” his voice cracked, “I’ll help. Let me fix you, please.”

“This thing,” you whispered, “the harm I inflict upon myself...it helps. It reanchors me. It’s an attempt to reciprocate my mental pain. But Mark, you can’t fix me. Nobody can.”

[trashmenofmarvel]

In the Quiet, You Will Find Me (Pt. 2)

Pairing: CEO!Sebastian Stan x Reader

Summary: The worst snowstorm to hit New York in a decade leads you to be trapped in your cramped apartment with your boss.

No problem, right?

(For @marvelfulxbabes​ ‘s Writing Challenge! Oh my God, I’m so so sorry I’m late!)

Song Prompt: Dynasty by MIIA

Warnings: Explicit sex scenes, misunderstandings, angst w/ a happy ending

AO3

Part 1

You refused to let the tears flow today. You didn’t want them to flow while you were packing. While you were picking up your old life and depositing it into neat, tidy boxes, storing it away to be later revealed in a new, strange place.

You wouldn’t let them fall, because if you did, that meant you were thinking about him.

Christmas evening had been more than magical, it had been perfect. Sebastian had been true to his word, testing how many times he could make your toes curl as your body thrummed like an electric wire.

In between those moments, made sweeter by his earnestness, you had shown him your drawings. Landscapes of the city, vast and expansive, while others were myopic snapshots of little moments captured in the course of the day. Strangers walking by, consumed in their own worlds but no less interesting because of it, scarves wrapped around their mouths and throats to give them a mysterious appeal.

Your personal favorites were of the animals that somehow survived in the sometimes merciless metropolis. Wary, hardened street cats, aggressively cooing pigeons seeking forgotten morsels, and the ducks and geese in Central Park during the summer when the lakes were unfrozen.

You thought they were childish and silly. Sebastian had thought they were riveting.

Something wet and warm on your face; you already knew what it was from the burning of your eyes. You eradicated the tears with a frustrated swipe and went back to packing up the evidence of your meager life.

When your aching back and rumbling stomach forced you to take a break, you checked your phone out of habit, forgetting you had turned it off. You stared at the dead device in your hand, chewing on your lip as you deliberated. With a press of your finger, you brought it to life.

Twenty-two unread texts. A similar amount of missed phone calls, along with a handful of voicemail messages. Many of them were from Monica, but most of them were from Sebastian.

Like a person possessed, you couldn’t stop your actions as you opened the messages and scrolled through some of them.

Monica: Are you sure about this hun??? Even tho you signed the NDA and gave your notice, you can change your mind. I’ll make it work.

Monica: Hope you’re doing ok. I’m worried about you. Did something happen?? I feel like I never should have asked you to pick him up.

Her last two messages were sent a day later, the anger blazing through the letters.

Monica: I know you wouldn’t quit without a reason. What did he do.

Monica: Please tell me what he did. Forget HR and the company lawyers, we’ll go to another firm. Whatever he did, he’s not getting away with it.

These last texts sent you into a panic, and you broke your communication hiatus to send back a few quick texts.

He didn’t do anything. Promise. I’m just ready for something new. Thank you for worrying about me but I’m fine.

It didn’t sound as convincing as you’d hoped, but you didn’t have the energy to put on a convincing act. At least this way, you hoped she wouldn’t sic a team of lawyers after someone who didn’t deserve it.

And he didn’t deserve it. You could see that from the very last message he had sent.

S. Stan: Please, say something.

You clicked off the screen with a shaky press of your thumb and set the phone down, out of sight and out of mind. You had hours left of packing to do, planning to fill up the rest of your New Year’s Eve with packing and storing. You deserved a respite from the man whose face occupied your thoughts and tormented your sleep.

Even now, as you tried to focus on frying a grilled cheese sandwich on the stove, your thoughts strayed to that magically snowy night trapped in your apartment and the following Christmas morning. Your chest tightened as you remembered how perfect he had looked, standing right where you stood now and cooking breakfast for you both. As easily as if he belonged there. Afterwards, you had cuddled on the couch under the blanket, as if you did it every morning after breakfast.

On the drive back to his building—after he had called to confirm the power was back on—the vestiges of unease had crawled up your spine. You’d shaken it off, figuring it was nothing more than your usual paranoia and low self-esteem. Outside of your apartment, away from the timeless bubble the two of you had created, reality had crept back in, as had your doubts.

You had pushed it away—how could you not, with Sebastian sitting right next to you, the warmth in his eyes and the softness of his smile chasing away all your fears?

After you had pulled up to his building, he had turned to you, the light in his eyes dimming as he fixed you with a serious stare, reciting the words that had sent you on your current tumultuous course.

“We can talk about this later. Okay?”

The smile had been frozen on your face as your thoughts had ground to a halt.

Sebastian hadn’t seemed to notice, and he leaned forward to press his lips to your temple, and with a quick exit into the frigid world outside, he was gone. That perfect moment had been shattered into a thousand fractal pieces.

We can talk about this later. Okay?

You weren’t an idiot. You had done the unthinkable, slept with your boss like a cringey cliché, and now he regretted his actions. There was no pleasant vodka buzz to gloss over the fact you were, in fact, two people from very different stratospheres.

And now, it was time for the “talk.” No, you weren’t an idiot at all; you knew exactly what that meant. If anyone caught wind of what had happened, it would be all over the media in a shitstorm of bad PR and ugly accusations. You saw stories about it all the time, men in power taking advantage of the women who worked under them.

It didn’t matter that that’s not what happened, it was how the situation would be perceived. Sebastian’s reputation would take a hit. Even if he weathered the storm with nothing more than a little smudge on his name, your career in New York was over. You would be shamed, blacklisted, and pegged as a duplicitous woman that would sleep her way to the top.

All of these truths had crashed down on your as you’d driven back to your apartment, your vision becoming so blurred you’d had to pull over to get yourself under control. It was then you had decided there was only one thing to do, to save both Sebastian’s reputation and your chances of ever becoming a paid artist in the city.

You had to quit, and so… you had. Quietly, without fanfare, you gave your notice from your laptop, never stepping foot out of your apartment and taking the chance of seeing his face at the office. You had known what you had to do but running into Sebastian would have shattered your resolve and further broken your heart.

You stared at the sizzling grease in the frying pan, your stomach turning, as it had so frequently done the past week. You knew how it would go, could already hear the conversation in your head.

That night was fun, really fun, but I could get in trouble. People might get the wrong idea if this gets out. You don’t want that, do you? This is better, for both of us, if you find a new place of employment. And, hey, I can give you a great recommendation…

Your stomach gave another rebellious heave. You flicked off the burner and roughly dumped the pan into the sink, biting your lip hard, but it didn’t matter; the hiccupping sob escaped, anyway.

I hate him, you told yourself. Tried to convince yourself you believed it. It didn’t work, and you wished it did. Maybe it would hurt less if you could hate him.

Lunch abandoned in the sink, you turned back to the shattered pieces of your life, and continued to pack them away.

***

You sat on the floor, back against the wall, and stared morosely at your phone; your TV and couch had both been put into storage, so you had to make due as you watched Times Square live. The glittering ball hung poised in the air, even if it was a whole hour until it would drop and the New Year would be rung in with the sound of cheers, music, and sappy moments captured on camera between enthusiastically groping couples.

Ugh.

The only thing left to complete your night of misery and self-pity was a bottle of rosé that sat untouched on the floor in front of you. You’d forgone a glass, planning to drink the damned thing straight from the source.

You hadn’t. You hadn’t had a drink since that night. Every time your eyes wandered to the bottle, you remembered the warmth spreading through your chest as Sebastian smiled at you, teasing you with those bright eyes and plump, curled lips.

With an abruptness that left your head spinning, you grabbed the neck of the bottle and launched to your feet, sped across the living room, and shoved the bottle into an open box.

The resounding knock on your door startled you so bad you nearly tripped over the box you had just closed.

The fuck? Who would be knocking on your door on the cusp of the New Year? You’d already tidied everything away with the leasing office, you hadn’t ordered in for days, and you had never been social enough to make friends with your neighbors.

You couldn’t guess who was on your doorstep, and yet, as you approached and reached out for the door handle, your heart was beating a panicked rhythm in your chest.

You pulled down, opened the door… and couldn’t breathe.

Despite the late hour and the brutally cold conditions outside, he looked as fashionably kempt as ever. Dark hair swept back into a ponytail at the base of his neck, a grey cap on his head, and the dark winter ensemble making him look like he could have just stepped off the set of a magazine shoot.

The widened, puppy-dog expression only made the entire thing that more endearing, and after the initial shock of seeing Sebastian on your threshold wore off, you felt the first hints of anger.

“I tried calling,” were the first words to tumble out of his mouth, the rest following like spilled water. “Texted, too. I didn’t want to bother you, Monica already snapped at me for pestering her, but I can’t—why?” he blurted, interrupting himself. “Why did you quit?”

Before you could swallow to speak past the tight pain in your throat, his eyes wandered over your shoulder and widened.

“Are those… moving boxes?” His voice was faint and smaller than you’d ever heard it before.

The anger rose higher in your chest, fanned by the stinging of your eyes. Your fists clenched at your side as you struggled to breathe. It wasn’t fair. Why was he here? Doing this now when you had been so close to finally letting him go?

Your silence hadn’t escaped him, and when his blue eyes descended back on your face, they were glassy and red-rimmed.

“What’s going on?” he asked in that same soft, shattered tone, and fuck, it was killing you to hear him sound that way, even now.

“Sebastian,” you implored in a hollow, lifeless voice that didn’t sound like you at all. “Please don’t make this any harder than it has to be.”

“Make what harder?” He searched your face, desperate and pleading with his words. “I don’t understand. Did something happen?”

You looked away, unable to meet his eye when he was looking at you as if his whole world was crumbling. Why was he doing this to you? Acting as if you were the one who had ended this before it could ever truly start?

“Can…” He swallowed hard enough for you to hear it, the strain in his voice palpable. “Can I come in? Please?”

No, you wanted to say, even as your heart declared the opposite. Already, you could feel yourself caving, finding an excuse to let him in, telling yourself that it wouldn’t look good to the neighbors to argue in the hallway. If someone recognized him…

You moved aside, keeping your back against the door as you gave him silent passage. With shoulders hunched and brows creased, hesitant as if stepping into hostile territory, he moved past you across the threshold. He didn’t pause until he was in the living room, his eyes heartbreakingly wide as he took in the full extent of your mostly-empty apartment.

You closed the door so softly the lock didn’t make a sound, and you remained with your back to the wood, a hand curled around the handle as if in reminder that you had an escape route right there if you needed to take it.

Waiting for him to speak, you kept your eyes to the floor. It hurt too much to look at his face and the confused, fallen expression you had glimpsed there.

“I don’t understand.” His voice was quiet but the hurt in it was louder than a shout. You flinched as if he had. “Did I… do something?”

A ruffling noise drew your eyes upward to catch him running a gloved hand through his hair, the ponytail at the nape of his neck already loosening from its tie.

“Of course—of course I did something,” he answered his own question, dazed as his blue eyes finally met yours. “It was me, right? The reason you quit. I did something wrong, I fucked it all up. Please, just…”

He took several steps toward you. Your spine straightened and you pressed your back instinctually against the door. Sebastian stopped in his tracks, his wounded puppy-dog expression so plaintive it panged deep in your chest.

He spread his gloved hands, slowly as if not to spook you. “Tell me what it was. Tell me, so I can fix it. Please.”

Something thin and fragile snapped inside you, and you said the words, small and broken, before you could stop.

“You were going to ask me to leave.”

His lips parted, his eyes widening.

“I—what?”

You took a breath, shaky and not filled with enough air.

“You were going to tell me to leave. To quit.” Your voice was shaking but you continued on regardless. “That’s what you—you wanted to talk about, right? To get me to quit.”

He released a small, confused noise and said, “Well… yes.”

The pain hit you harder than expected, stabbing into your chest like a thin spear of jagged ice. You thought you had been prepared to hear the truth, and now you wished you could take it back, feeling if he said anything else you would simply die on the spot.

Sebastian continued speaking, apparently unaware that he had taken your heart, thrown it onto the ground and carelessly stomped on it.

“I was going to ask you to quit so that I could hire you as an independent contractor.”

Now it was your muscles that went lax and your mouth that partially opened in blatant confusion.

“You…what?”

He shuffled his feet, his fingers now fidgeting in front of him as he met your eye with a nervousness you’d never seen around the office.

“Mackie is always going on about how I need to allocate my workload better. That I take on too much and don’t ‘outsource’ the help I need. He’s right, the guy is right about damn near everything.” He gave a self-deprecating huff and a wince in response at the mention of his business partner. You’d always liked Mr. Mackie, and from what you’d seen of Sebastian’s work schedule, you knew he was right about being overworked.

But that still didn’t explain—

“I’ve wanted to do a new toy line for a while now, something with plushy animals, it’s always been popular with young kids. But I put it off because I haven’t had the time, and I didn’t trust anyone else with something as important as visual concepts, and then, when I saw your drawings…”

Sebastian gave a helpless shrug, his eyes pleading as they sought out yours. When you said nothing, because your brain was no longer functioning, he bit his lip and took a step closer.

“I… I was intrigued. I asked Monica for the paperwork you submitted on hiring—not the personal stuff, just your art portfolio. I don’t know why I hadn’t seen it before, I’m such an idiot for missing it, but it’s… I mean. It’s exactly what I’ve been looking for.”

He stared at you, for so long and so sincerely, that you forced your lips to move and form the only words you could think of.

“You… wanted to hire me… to draw animals?”

Sebastian blinked and his lips formed into a painful smile that might have been silly but endearing if the circumstances had been something else.

“Yes?”

His confirmation did absolutely nothing to clear the heavy fog in your head. Nor did it slow the dull thudding of your racing heart.

“I don’t… understand,” you finally said. Or more accurately, squeezed out in a quiet, strained breath. “I thought you…”

Sebastian took another step; he was in front of you now, the heat radiating off him seemed unreasonable for one person to emit.

“You thought what?” he asked, searching your eyes. “That I regretted it? That I changed my mind?”

“Well,” you stammered out, your voice gaining some strength. “Well, yeah, of course I did. We… we were drinking, and you’re you, and I’m me, and why would you ever want me? Why would you risk your career, the company you built, just for one night on a ratty old couch in a, in a cramped, run-down apartment, with a woman who had been nothing but cold to you for years—“

Sebastian moved forward the last few inches, faster than you were prepared for, and crowded you against the door. Before you could speak his lips were on yours, hot and insistent. His hands gripped your waist tightly, pushing you against the wood as you gasped against him.

He pulled away only far enough to look down into your face, eyes clear with worry.

“Uh. Shit. That’s not how—I shouldn’t have done that, this isn’t why I came over—“

You surged forward, smothering his apologies with another kiss. You grabbed the front of his coat, gripping your fingers tightly around the lapels as your mouth opened to his, begging or inviting, you didn’t know, but he responded immediately, his tongue licking into your mouth as his hands crushed you against the hard planes of his body.

You decided he was wearing too much clothing, and he must have realized the same thing; he pulled off his coat and jacket, clumsily as he refused to stop kissing you for even a moment. You had better luck, unzipping your jeans and shoving them down your hips, regrettably breaking contact from his lips as you hastily pulled them off your legs.

When you straightened up, Sebastian’s hands were immediately gripping your ass and he pulled you off your feet, forcing you to wrap your legs around his waist in a movement that left you clinging to his shoulders for dear life. You caught a glimpse of his impish grin before his lips were back on yours, barely letting you catch your breath.

He was like a man dying of thirst and you were his desert-bound oasis.

Somehow, with his lips hot on yours and not looking where he was going, he made it to your bedroom. He may have bumped into a wall or two on the way, but neither of you had been paying enough attention to care, your fingers plunged into his hair and his hands still firmly gripping your ass.

You belatedly remembered the mattress and bedframe had been taken to the moving van earlier that day, leaving only the flat sleeping mat you had replaced it with. Breaking away from his lips with regret, you sputtered, “Wait, the bed’s gone.”

“Uh-huh,” was his only response and the only piece of warning you got before you were tipping backwards. You tightened your grip around his neck and gave a frightened yelp, but he merely laughed as he lowered you both down onto the mat. You could feel every muscle straining under his dress shirt and dark slacks, carrying you both with ease, and the sheer strength of him lit something deep within your belly.

As soon as you were flat on your back, you tugged at his shirt impatiently, fingers fumbling with the buttons as you cursed the fact he wasn’t already naked. And Sebastian was not helping you at all; he leaned down and captured your lips again, forcing you flat against the mat with more strength than you could hope to match. Your protests turned into muffled moans as he pushed his hips between your knees, your legs automatically wrapping around his waist as he pressed his weight on top of you.

Giving up on unbuttoning his shirt, you reached down and tugged up your own, forcing your lips apart as you pulled it over your head.

Not to be outdone, Sebastian lowered his face to your neck, kissing and sucking on the sensitive skin. Within seconds you were writhing, almost completely naked underneath him while he was still mostly clothed. It was entirely unfair and ridiculously hot, the feel of his expensive, tailored clothing brushing against your heated skin.

He ran his fingers down your bare sides, sending sparks and shivers down your spine as his hand continued its journey over your hip and down your pelvis. He slipped under the waistband of your underwear, mouthing at your collarbone as he twisted and curled his fingers around, dipping them between your folds.

He groaned and uttered a quick, “Jesus,” as he felt how incredibly wet you were before he’d even truly begun.

“Sebastian,” you breathed out, half in need and half in frustration, grinding your hips against his hand as he began to rub circles around your nub. “Stop teasing.”

“Teasing?” he mumbled into your skin, never moving his lips from the column of your throat. “Some people call it foreplay.”

“Yeah, I know, but—“ You cut off your own words with a shiver, biting down on your lip as you tried not to cry out at the sparks he was igniting in your lower abdomen. “I want… you. Just you. Right now.”

His lips stilled immediately and he pulled back to look down into your face. Whatever he saw there darkened his gaze and tightened his hold on your waist.

Without a word, Sebastian leaned back and began to unbutton his shirt, fingers expertly working open the clasps and revealing his skin inch by inch. He wasn’t slow about it but it still felt like a tantalizing show, one just for you and no one else.

He slipped the open shirt over his shoulders and pulled off the undershirt, yanking it off in one smooth motion. The lights of the city reflecting off the low-hanging clouds shone through your windows, bathing his body in a faint glow, the divots and curves of his muscles thrown into soft relief.

All you could do was stare and try to remember to breathe, made harder as he reached down and unbuckled his belt. He pushed his pants down over his hips, the sight of his cock straining against his dark boxer-briefs a lovely image you wished you could commit to memory. Or better yet, replicate with graphite and ink.

Despite the fact you were both mostly naked and his fingers had been inside you a second ago, that was the thing that flushed your skin with heat. You averted your eyes to his navel, but the sight of his firm and defined abs did nothing to clear the filthy thoughts from your head.

“You’re very cute when you do that,” he said with a lopsided smirk, half-leaning over you now as he tugged off his pants.

“What?” you asked, tone absent and distracted as you caught sight of his long, muscled thighs from between your legs. You had to clench your jaw not to make an obscene noise at the sight.

“When you get flustered,” he said, amused.

“I’m not—“

Sebastian suddenly pressed his weight on top of you, nearly covering you with his warmth, and your brain short-circuited at the abrupt contact of so much skin. Your thighs, your stomach, your chest, everywhere you were touching him your skin tingled and warmed.

Sebastian smirked down at you, knowing exactly what he was doing. He opened his mouth, probably to tease you some more, but you never gave him the chance. Capturing his lips in a hard, frantic kiss, you clutched the side of his head in your hands as you squeezed with your thighs.

Moaning against your mouth, he kissed back just as firmly, tasting you on his tongue as his hands roamed down your hips. With a quick motion, he pulled your underwear down your hips, and you grabbed them to yank them off the rest of the way. Sebastian did the same to his own pair, and before you could stop yourself, you tilted your hips upwards and dragged your slit along his shaft.

His breath caught in his throat and his fingertips digging painfully into your thighs, but he didn’t stop you as you rubbed against him, shamefully needful. You wouldn’t let him pull far enough away so he could reach down and line up with your entrance; you simply continued to grind against him to the point he had to take matters into his own hands.

Sebastian gripped your hips and held you down against the mat, breaking the kiss with a shudder as he leaned his forehead against yours.

“F—fuck, you can’t keep doing that or I’m gonna come.”

“Then come,” you responded roughly. “That’s not gonna stop me from getting off on you.”

With a delicious noise that was halfway between a moan and a growl, Sebastian pulled his hips back, lined the head of his cock against your entrance, and pushed. Hard.

If you hadn’t been as wet as you were it would have hurt, but as it was, the potential pain was translated into electrifying pleasure. Your neck pulled into an arch as you cried out, your fingers digging into the muscled planes of his back.

“Oh, fuck,” he gasped out. “Jesus, give me a… give me a minute.”

“Told you.” Your voice sounded slurred, almost drugged as you grazed your lips against his hair. “Come if you have to, I’m not… gonna stop.”

“God,” he said, laughing quietly against your neck. “You are…”

You never got to find out what you were, because his lips were back on your skin again, trailing up your jaw and back to your mouth. Kissing Sebastian was almost like having sex with him to begin with, the way his lips and tongue slowly unraveled you and left you pliant and breathless.

Never breaking away from your lips, Sebastian slid out a few inches and pushed back in, sending a spark of tightening pleasure through your pelvis. He swallowed up your whine, seemed to savor it as he did it again, harder, the second time.

You had to break away from the kiss, gasping for air, and Sebastian took advantage of the moment to nip and suck against your jaw as he began to set an unrelenting pace. Each pump of his hips, every movement of his cock sliding deep within your walls, you grew that much closer to the release you craved.

And yet… you wanted to put it off as long as possible. You never wanted this moment to end, even now afraid you would wake up and it would be a dream. Reveling in his skin sliding against yours, breathing in his scent, hearing the small, breathless noises he was making as he held you close—it was all that mattered. He was your entire world, and in that moment, you didn’t doubt that you were his.

The pressure was building in your abdomen faster than you could stop it. Your grip tightened on his shoulders, your voice tightly coiled as you moaned, “Sebastian, I’m going to, God, I’m going to—“

His answer came in the form of heated kisses along your neck, lips murmuring against your skin. “Come for me.”

As if on command, the pressure burst without you, blooming into petals of bright ecstasy as you cried out, throbbing hot around his cock.

His rhythm faltered and his hips thrust against yours one last time. He held his arms around you tightly, long fingers gripping your hair as he moaned your name like a desperate prayer. His cock throbbed deep inside you and you shivered from the slight aftershocks of your own orgasm.

Laden with the pure bliss of your afterglow, you gently held his head in your hands and kissed up his chin to his mouth. His lips curled against your mouth, a smile you couldn’t see but could feel, and the warmth in your chest was too much for any one person to experience.

You didn’t know it could feel this way, and now that you had, what were you supposed to do now? Sebastian Stan had officially ruined you. With his fingers cradling your hair and his weight centered between your legs, you found you didn’t mind the idea.

The sudden emptiness of Sebastian pulling out and lifting his weight from your body dimmed some of the afterglow, but it brightened again when he returned with a damp washcloth. He kneeled next to you, giving you a spectacular view of his glistening skin, kissed your forehead and mumbled, “It’s a good thing you didn’t pack all the towels away. Speaking of…”

You blushed, both in mortifying embarrassment of your huge earlier misunderstanding and by the feel of him slowly and gently wiping up the mess between your thighs.

“Yeah?” you asked in an unsteady croak. The sound brought a warm smile to his lips and there was an impish gleam in his eyes.

“Where is all of your stuff? Put away in storage or moved to a new apartment?” His brows furrowed, as if something had just dawned on him. “Wait… The quitting thing, I get, but why the moving?”

You bit your lip in reluctance, knowing how extreme your answer would seem now that you knew the truth.

“I uh… Well. Some of it is in storage, the rest I sent… back home.”

He stopped wiping at your legs, staring down at you as if you’d spoken an alien language.

“You’re leaving the city?” His voice slightly cracked with the strain of his question. You could see it in his eyes too, the realization that you had planned on leaving without saying goodbye, and the pain of that knowledge was plain on his face.

“I was,” you responded, wincing. “Because I thought… I thought you wanted me to quit, so no one would find out what we did, and I took it a step further. I figured, you know…”

“You thought I would want you to leave the city?” he asked, incredulous. You looked down, unable to meet his eye in your shame.

“I don’t know. Maybe? Either way, I thought I would go somewhere else, start fresh.” That had been your intention anyway, even though you’d had zero interest in picking up your life and moving on. You had still been in the grief stage of trying to let Sebastian go, and yeah, you hadn’t been thinking clearly.

Despite all of that, Sebastian didn’t look at you with judgement or anger. Going by the crease of his brows and the tight frown on his lips, he was more upset and saddened than anything.

“I’m sorry.” He took your hand in his, intertwining his fingers through yours as he raised it to his mouth and kissed your knuckles. “Really sorry. I wasn’t thinking. I was so excited about offering you the contract that I didn’t think… I wanted it to be a surprise, so I didn’t tell you right away, either. God, I’m such an idiot.”

Your eyebrows rose in disbelief. He was apologizing to you?

“No, Sebastian, I’m sorry.” You chewed on your lips, trying to find the right words to say, to explain how you felt, but the words just wouldn’t come.

Seeming to understand you needed a moment, Sebastian settled down next to you, and finding your blanket tossed to the side he pulled it over the both of you. His close body heat was an immediate comfort and helped melt away the tension in your muscles.

You moved closer to him without consciously doing so, drawn to him like a moth to flame.

“I’m going to be honest,” you said, tracing your thumb over his knuckles. He gave you a solemn nod to continue. “Someone like you? They don’t end up with someone like me.”

Already he opened his mouth to protest, and you plunged forward before he could interrupt.

“It’s true, all right? That’s just the way things are. I’ve accepted it. Or I did, until that night. So I thought, when you wanted to talk… I mean, I thought you had regretted the whole thing after sobering up. And I wouldn’t have blamed you, really. It hurt, yeah, it hurt a lot, but… I just told myself to stop being delusional. That you didn’t owe me anything after a night of sex.”

He spoke your name, softly and filled with emotion, but you weren’t done yet and had to keep going before you lost your nerve.

“And then it turns out that’s not the case at all, that you really are a great guy, and it just proves the fact that I’m not good enough for you. It’s only been a week and look at what I did. I fully intended to run away because of a simple misunderstanding.”

Your eyes burned as your vision blurred, throat tightening up with the pain that settled deep in your chest, and you said, “Why would you want to be with someone like that? I’m a mess.”

Sebastian didn’t speak for a moment. He looked over your face in a slow way that was almost unsettling, his gaze so heavy you struggled not to squirm. Finally, he gently pushed a strand of hair behind your ear and his expression lightened.

“You know more about me than most people,” he said. “And not just because it was your job to know these things. I showed you parts of me no one gets to see. You know for a fact, as Monica and Mackie can confirm, I am also a mess. Do you think well-adjusted people have nowhere to go on Christmas Eve, to the point where they have to have an employee come rescue them in the middle of a snowstorm?”

You snorted and immediately covered your mouth, horrified, but Sebastian only gave a self-deprecating grin. After a moment, his expression grew more serious.

“This job, this contract, I want you to have it no matter what. No strings attached. It doesn’t matter if… if you want to be with me or not. This isn’t a quid pro quo situation. You are a talented artist, and I could really use the help.”

He licked his lips and swallowed hard enough for you to see his Adam’s apple move.

“That being said… if you did want to pursue a relationship…”

You recognized the unsteadiness of his tone as nervousness, his eyes wider than usual as he looked down into your face.

“…you would be free to do so. If that’s something you wanted.”

The serious apprehension on his face, coupled by his almost formal tone made you think of a business proposal. You knew that wasn’t what it was, he had just said as much, but it was sort of fascinating to see him take this as seriously as he would if it was a company matter.

You pretended to think for a moment, the tip of your tongue pressing against your upper lip. His eyes followed the movement, and you didn’t miss the way his nostrils flared as he watched you.

“Will the pay be better than my last job?” you asked, deadpan. He blinked, lips slightly parted in surprise. You added, “Just… curious. I could barely afford this place to begin with, and now I gotta find a new apartment. And with rent always going up in this city… plus you have to factor in all of the art supplies I’m gonna need—“

Not for the first time that evening, and probably not the last, your words were swallowed by Sebastian’s urgent kisses, his lips desperate on yours as if it was the last time he would taste them.

You moaned and wrapped your arms around him, happily sighing as he moved his chest on top of you, pushing you down into the mat.

“Is that a yes?” he mumbled against your lips, barely letting you up for air let alone to give a proper answer. You hummed and squeezed him tighter, letting your body convey all the assurances he needed.

It felt as if you were saying ‘yes’ to much more than a new job. You were opening the way for a new life, one that included a man you had thought would want no part of it.

There was no friction, no difficulty or unnatural feeling with returning to his arms, not once you’d opened your heart to him again. Like Pandora’s box, there was no closing the lid, but you sensed that Sebastian knew that. He already knew how fragile you were despite your rough exterior, or maybe because of it.

It was scary as hell to let someone in, letting them get close enough to hold your heart in the palm of their hand. But if there was anyone who would be gentle and kind with your heart, who would treasure and protect it like a precious thing…

“So,” he asked, somewhat breathless as he finally released your lips, his eyes bright with a warmth that felt like coming home. “I take it you’re going to need a place to stay until you find a new apartment. I happen to have a very large, very expensive couch that’s currently unoccupied. Apparently, it’s so good Mackie can’t shut up about it. Would you… like to break it in?”

…it was him.

[atomic-taco-muffin]

The Lost Princess Chapter 14

Warnings: fluff/angst

Rating: SFW

You and the others traveled back to Traverse Town and found Yuffie in the First District. 

“Hey Yuffie. Have you seen Leon?” you asked. 

“Leon’s probably at the underground cavern. He trains there often. You know, the channel in the alleyway is connected to the cavern,” she said. 

“Okay, thanks!” The four of you entered the Alleyway though the Second District and found a grate at the edge of it. You all tackled the bars and entered the Secret Waterway. The four of you swam through the channel to where Leon was practicing his battle swing. Aerith was there with him. 

“So, you found the Keyhole,” he said. 

“Yeah. The Keyblade locked it automatically,” Sora said. 

“Good. Anything on your search for your parents, (Y/N)?” Aerith said. 

“Nothing yet. But I’m not giving up,” you said. 

“That’s good.” 

“Every world among the stars has a Keyhole. And each one leads to the heart of that world. There must be one in this town as well,” Leon said. 

“What do you mean?” Sora asked. 

“It was in Ansem’s report,” Aerith said. 

“The Heartless enter through the Keyhole and do something to the world’s core,” Leon said, crossing his arms. 

“What happens to the world?” you asked. 

“In the end, it disappears,” Aerith said. 

“What?!” the four of you asked. 

“That’s why your key is so important. And your powers,” Leon said. 

“Please lock the Keyholes. You’re the only one who can,” Aerith said. 

“I don’t know...” Sora said. 

“Seeing other worlds would probably serve you well,” Leon said. 

“Yeah!” Donald said. 

“We gotta find your friends! And King Mickey! And (Y/N)’s parents!” Goofy said. 

“Please, Sora. I know you can do it. Just like you know that I’ll be able to find my family,” you said, taking Sora’s hands into yours. 

“I guess you’re right... Okay!” Sora said. He suddenly remembered the gummi block. 

“Hey, Leon. This gummi block’s different from the others. Do you know what it’s for?” he asked. Leon had no answer. 

“Ask Cid. He should know,” Aerith said. 

“Wait, Sora. Take this with you,” Leon said as he gave Sora a stone. 

“This stone holds some mysterious power. I’ve been carrying it for luck. I want you to hold onto it,” he said. 

“How do you use it?” you asked. Leon crossed his arms, silently thinking. 

“Uh, Leon?” Sora asked. The four of you left the Secret Waterway and returned to the First District. You four entered the Accessory Shop and spoke to a Moogle. 

“A big tournament is being held somewhere, kupo,” it said. The four of you went to go talk to Cid. 

“What’ve you got there? Hey! Well, if it ain’t a gummi block,” he said. 

“Yup,” you said. 

“What’s this one for?” Goofy asked. 

“You’re kiddin’ me! You’re flyin’ a gummi ship and you don’t know nothin’ about navigation gummis? Bunch of pinheads. Interspace ain’t no playground,” Cid said. 

“There’s a lot we don’t know. So what! We have to use the gummi ship to go to other worlds. We don’t have a choice,” Sora said. 

“Whoa, easy,” Cid said as scratched his head. 

“I didn’t know. No hard feelings, all right? Well, I guess I could lend y’all a hand, then,” he said. 

“Thanks,” you said. 

“Basically, with navigation gummis, you can go to new places. You want one on your ship, right?” Cid said. You all nodded your head in agreement. 

“I’ll install it for you. But I got this thing I gotta go deliver first,” he said. 

“What do you need to deliver?” Sora asked. 

“Just this book. It’s real old. When the guy brought it in, it was practically falling apart. Too beat up to restore it to the way it was. But overall, I did a decent job puttin’ it back together. Anyway, you mind deliverin’ it for me? It’s the old house past the Third District. Look for a big fire sign,” Cid said. He handed Sora the old book before a loud bell rang. 

“Wh-What was that?” Sora asked. 

“Hmm? The bell at the gizmo shop is ringing. Go check it out if you want, but deliver that book for me first. When you’re done, stop by the house in the Third District. I’ll be there,” Cid said. The four of you left the shop and entered the Third District, finding the fire sign at the end of an alley. Sora hit it with a Fire spell and the door unlocked. The four of you entered a large cavern where a mystical house sat on a central island. Several stepping stones lined the path in the water. You and Sora jumped on them and they begin to move rhythmically. Timing yourselves, you traversed the stones and reached the house. The house looked beaten and worn down despite its festive purple hue. The front entrance way was covered in wooden boards and cloth. You found a broken hole in the side of the brick wall with a green curtain draped over it, and used it to get into the house. The four of you entered an empty space with a raised platform in the center. You and Sora heard a voice behind you and whirled around. 

“There’s something about this musty place...” Kairi said. She walked slowly through the room, holding her hands behind her back. 

“It reminds me of the secret place back home, where we used to scribble on the walls. Remember?” she said as she looked towards you two and smiled. 

“Kairi?” you and Sora asked. 

“Sora? (Y/N)?” Goofy asked. The two of you turned to see a concerned Donald and Goofy before looking back to Kairi, who had vanished completely. 

“Well, well,” someone said. The four of you looked over to the entrance curtain and saw an old wizard in blue robes with an extremely long beard. He was carrying a carpet bag and a wand. 

“You’ve arrived sooner than I expected,” he said. 

“Wha... You knew we were coming?” you asked. 

“Of course,” he said. 

“Are you a Heartless?” Sora asked. 

“He doesn’t look like one,” Donald said.

“Oh, my. No. My name is Merlin. As you can see, I am a sorcerer. I spend much of my time traveling. It’s good to be home. Your king has requested my help,” Merlin said. 

“King Mickey?” Goofy asked. 

“Yes, indeed. Donald, Goofy. And who might you be, young ones?” 

“I’m Sora.” 

“And I’m (Y/N).” 

“Ah. So, you have found the key. And you have inherited the power of the spirit.”

“What did the king ask you to do?” Donald asked. 

“Just a moment...” Merlin walked up to the stairs and set down his carpet bag before reaching the center of the raised platform. He lifted his wand high in the air. 

“Presto!” he said. Dust flew around the carpet bag as it opened and out popped teapots, tables, drawers, and chairs, small at first, but quickly growing larger. The wacky wizard danced around while waving his wand, directing the items from the bag to their respective places in the house. Soon after, the room was entirely furnished, complete with bed, desk, and multiple piles of books. 

“There, now. Ahem,” he said as he turned to face you and Sora. 

“Your king asked me to train you in the art of magic. We can start anytime you like. Let me know when you’re ready to begin the training. Oh, and one more thing,” he said. He turned to the entrance where a small model of a royal carriage was placed on the floor next to the telescope in the open window. Magic sparkled in the air coalesce at the carriage’s place and formed an elderly woman in blue robes with a pink bow around her neck. She wore her hood over her white hair and held up a long magic wand. She smiled at you guys sweetly. 

“Hello. I’m the Fairy Godmother. Your king asked me to help, too. I will assist throughout your journey. But first, I must speak with you, dear,” she said as she turned to you. 

“Um, okay,” you said. 

“I heard that you had the power of a spirit and had a dagger.”

“Yeah. It’s right here,” you said as you pulled out the dagger. 

“Oh, my. It’s still in good shape after not being used for so long. Did you know that this belonged to your mother?” 

“Wait, really?” 

“Mhm. Just look at the scabbard. It has your mother’s name on it.” You looked at the scabbard and saw your mother’s name written on it in cursive. 

“Wow. My mother was a spirit. Thank you, Fairy Godmother,” you said. 

“Of course dear,” she said. 

“I-I do not know how much I can be of help, but do stop by anytime,” Merlin said. Sora handed him the book from earlier. 

“Oh, that book... So, Cid asked you to bring this. Thank you. You wish to know what kind of book it is? I don’t even know, myself. In fact, it’s not mine. Somehow it found its way into my bag one day. It was such a curious book, I asked Cid to repair it for me. Well, I guess I’ll put it here somewhere, for now. This book holds a great secret. The missing pages will unlock it,” Merlin said. He pointed to a small bedside table. 

“I’ll leave the book over there. Do look at it whenever you like. My best regards to Cid for repairing it for me. Oh, and about that stone of yours... You should ask the Fairy Godmother about that,” he said. The four of you spoke to the Fairy Godmother and showed her Leon’s stone. 

“Do you know what this is?” Sora asked. 

“Oh, the poor thing! He has turned into a summon gem,” she said. 

“A summon gem?” you asked. 

“This little creature lived in a world that was consumed by darkness. When a world vanishes, so do its inhabitants. But this one has such a strong heart, he became a gem instead of vanishing with his world.” 

“Can he regain himself?” Sora asked. 

“Yes. But not completely. Now watch carefully, (Y/N). This might help strengthen your powers.” She waved her wand and Sora was granted the power to summon Simba. 

“Whenever you call, he will help you. If you find any more of these, bring them to me. Don’t worry, when their worlds are restored they will return there. Sora, (Y/N), please help save them,” she said. 

“Don’t worry. We will,” you said. Sora opened the old book on the nightstand and with a flash, you and Sora landed on its pages. A house of sticks appeared on the map and the of you ran over to it, entering an empty meadow. The two of you walked up to a large log, where a stuffed toy bear wearing a small red shirt was seated, tapping his forehead. 

“Think, think. Think, think,” he said. 

“Hi there. What’s wrong?” Sora asked. 

“Nothing. Just thinking.” 

“Oh.” 

“I was thinking of how to say goodbye to Pooh.” 

“Pooh?” you asked. 

“Yes?” he answered. 

“Wait a second. You’re Pooh?” you said as you sat down next to the bear. 

“Yes, I’m Winnie the Pooh. Pooh for short. Who are you?” 

“I’m (Y/N). And that’s Sora.” 

“Oh. Hello, (Y/N), Sora. Have you come to say goodbye to Pooh, too?” 

“Well, no. Why would we do that? We’ve only just met,” Sora said. 

“Because everyone’s gone away,” Pooh said. 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well, we all lived here in the Hundred Acre Wood. And we’d take walks together, or play Pooh sticks... And every day, I’d eat some honey. Just one small smackeral would taste very good right now,” Pooh said as he rubbed his tummy. 

“But now everyone’s gone. All my friends, and my favorite Hunny Tree too. Everyone must’ve gone away while I was napping, I think... So, who knows?” he said as he hopped off the log. 

“Maybe I shall end up going away somewhere as well. But I wonder, how do I say goodbye to myself?” he said as he put his hands on his head. 

“Think, think, think,” he said. You and Sora stared at him. 

“Oh, my tumbly is getting rather rumbly,” Pooh said. You and Sora watched him walk off. The two of you followed the bear to a house built into a tree. Above the door of the house was hung an odd sign reading “MR. SANDERZ” with a backwards N. Next to it was a bell with a misspelled note reading “Rnig also”. You and Sora entered the house, seeing Pooh gazing inside a honey pot. 

“Oh, bother. There’s no more honey left. If only the Hunny Tree would visit... Then I could eat my fill,” Pooh said. He stood up and left the house. You and Sora followed, being greeted outside by an owl. 

“Let me guess: You’d like to know what happens next. Unfortunately, some of the pages are missing, so I can’t tell you yet. The pages are scattered over many worlds. Would you find them for us?” he said. You and Sora exited the storybook and regrouped with Donald and Goofy in Merlin’s Study. 

“You’d best go see Cid before going anywhere else,” Merlin said. The four of you left the Mystical House and returned to the Third District. Soldier Heartless appeared, but they were taken out by someone with a sharp-looking sword. You and Sora looked incredibly surprised to see...

“There you two are. What’s going on?” Riku said. 

“Riku!” You and Sora said. The two of you walked up to Riku and Sora stretched his mouth out, making sure he’s real. 

“Hey, hey, cut it out,” Riku said. 

“Well, at least you’re real,” you said, giggling. 

“We’m not dreaming this time, right?” Sora asked. 

“I hope not. Took forever to find you guys,” Riku said as he rand a hand through his finger and you and Sora smiled. 

“Riku!” You and Sora said. Riku smiled back and you all started walking through the square. 

“Wait a second, where’s Kairi?” you asked. 

“Isn’t she with you?” Riku asked. You and Sora looked at the ground, sadly. 

“Well, don’t worry. I’m sure she made it off the island, too,” Riku said as he looked to the sky. 

“We’re finally free. Hey, she might even be looking for us now,” Riku said. A Shadow Heartless emerged from the ground, its antennae wriggling wildly. Riku was faced away from everyone. 

“We’ll all be together again soon. Don’t worry. Just leave everything to me. I know this—” Riku said. He heard a noise behind him, and turned to see you and Sora, who had just destroyed the Shadow Heartless. You Sora stood and Sora tossed the Keyblade over his shoulder while you placed your dagger back into the scabbard.

“Leave it to who?” Sora asked proudly. 

“Sora, (Y/N), what did you—” Riku asked as he walked up to you two.

“We’ve been looking for you and Kairi, too, with their help,” you said. Donald and Goofy nodded, but Riku looked apprehensive. 

“Who are they?” Riku asked. 

“Ahem. My name is—” Donald said. 

“We’ve visited so many places and worlds, looking for you,” Sora said. 

“Really? Well, what do you know? I never would have guessed,” Riku said. Goofy put his hands on you and Sora’s shoulders.

“Oh, and guess what? Sora’s the Keyblade master and (Y/N)’s a spirit. Her mother was one too,” Goofy said. 

“Who would’ve thought it?” Donald asked. 

“What’s that mean?” you and Sora asked. 

“So, this is called a Keyblade?” Riku asked as he held Sora’s Keyblade. 

“Huh?” Sora asked. He noticed that his Keyblade was not in his hand. 

“Hey, give it back,” he said. He rushed forward to grab it, but Riku moved back and Sora stumbled and fell over. Riku held the Keyblade above his head, getting a good look at it. 

“Catch” he said. He tossed it to Sora, who stood up quickly.  

“Okay, so you’re coming with us, right? We’ve got this awesome rocket. Wait ‘til you see it!” you said. 

“Yeah!” Sora said. 

“No, he can’t come!” Donald said, rudely. 

“What?” you and Sora asked. 

“Forget it!” Donald said. 

“Oh, come on! He’s our friend!” Sora said. 

“I don’t care!” The argument caught Goofy’s attention, but when he looked back at Riku, he saw no one. 

“Huh? He’s gone,” he said. Sora looked around the District, seeing nobody. 

“Riku?” you asked as you walked slowly. 

“Nice going. Oh, well. At least, he’s okay,” Sora said. He put his hands behind his head, being hopeful. 

“And who knows? Maybe we’ll run into Kairi soon, too,” you said. 

“Yeah,” Sora said. The four of you walked up the stairs to the Small House, seeing the lights on in the window and entered to find Cid, Leon, Yuffie, and Aerith inside. Boxes were stacked up against the wall and a lantern hung from the ceiling. 

“You guys ever hear of Maleficent?” Cid asked. You and Sora shook your head as Leon leaned against the wall. 

“I hear she’s in town,” Cid said. 

“Who is she?” you asked. 

“A witch, kid, she’s a witch!” 

“She’s the reason this town is full of Heartless. Don’t take her lightly,” Leon said. 

“She’s been using the Heartless for years,” Aerith said. 

“We lost our world, thanks to her,” Leon said. 

“One day, a swarm of Heartless took over our world!” Cid said. 

“That was nine years ago.” 

“I got out of that mess and came here with these guys.” 

“That’s awful!” you said. 

“Our ruler was a wise man named Ansem. He dedicated his life to studying the Heartless,” Leon said. 

“His report should tell us how to get rid of the Heartless,” Cid said. 

“Where’s this report?” Sora asked. 

“We don’t know. It got scattered when our world was destroyed,” Leon said. 

“I’m sure Maleficent’s got most of the pages,” Cid said. Outside, Maleficent stood with Riku, gazing at you guys through the windows of the house. 

“You see? It’s just as I told you. While you toiled away trying to find your dear friend, they quite simply replaced you with some new companions. Evidently, now they value them far more than they do you,” She said. She looked down at Riku as he stared with narrow, unblinking eyes. 

“You’re better off without those wretched kids,” she said. She bent down to his level, giving him a smile.

“Now, think no more of him and come with me. I’ll help you find what you’re searching for...” she said. 

To be continued...

[the-voltage-diaries]

tbh I think eisuke is better than Taki because he has more of a character development, wouldn't you agree?

Hey there, anon! Lmao that’s a kind of a controversial question you’ve asked me haha

Disclaimer: What’s written below is my own humble opinion, it’s not meant to hate on, or disregard, or disrespect anyone intentionally.

I’m going to have to say I disagree. And by saying I disagree, I am not, in the least bit, trying to state the counter: that Taki is better than Eisuke. If someone said that, I’d disagree then too. And that’s because of one simple reason, that Taki and Eisuke are two separate individuals with very, very different personalities and it’s wrong to compare them on the basis of character development, according to me. 

Here’s why:

1. Statue vs Rust Now, here’s a way to look at it. Eisuke’s character development is like making a statue, whereas Taki’s is like removing the rust. When it comes to Eisuke, his character development starts at a point where he doesn’t even know half the human emotions that exist, like love, care, affection, et cetera. He doesn’t invest his time in them because he’s never felt much of them, and the MC, over a period of time, has to make him understand what those emotions mean and how important they are. He gets introduced to a world he never knew, in a sense. That’s precisely why Eisuke has so much scope for development, too. In a metaphorical sense, it’s like the KBTBB MC meets a stone Eisuke and over a period of time, and after putting in tonnes of affection, hard work, and care, sculpts him into a beautiful statue. She slowly works on the intricate details and makes him into who he is now. Now, if you look at Taki, the scope for his character development is limited in this sense (I’ll elaborate on that in a bit). With him, it’s like polishing the rust off of something. When it comes to his story line, he is very different in terms of knowing emotions as compared to Eisuke because he has already felt emotions like love, care, affection, et cetera. In his teenage years, he was a very charming and kind individual who knew those feelings well. But, due to the misunderstanding with MC and the debt situation, he felt like those emotions aren’t meant to be felt, that they are a hindrance. He purposefully chose to mask over what he felt because he knew the price of letting them out. Here, MC’s task was to remove that facade, and she made him realise it’s okay to feel those feelings. It was like removing a thick layer of rust to allow his inner self to shine through. In simpler terms, it’s like letting something which was already there come up to the surface, instead of shaping it from scratch, like what happens with Eisuke.

Even if you look at their MS’, you’ll notice that Eisuke, by the end of his MS is still pretty bland whereas Taki has more of a feel to him. He smiles more, he’s more honest, and it’s like bringing a teenage Taki back.

2. Varying Scopes Eisuke’s stories are more about him coming to terms with his emotions and realizing he feels things which he didn’t even know he felt. More like, Eisuke’s story line’s central theme, in most cases, is working on his character development from an emotional point of view. It focuses on how Eisuke feels, and grows that into something more. Whereas with Taki, his stories aren’t about his character development with respect to feeling new emotions and dealing with them. His character development is linked to coming to terms with his past and allowing himself to feel what he denied feeling for so many years. That’s one reason why you won’t find a lot with Taki in terms of his emotional development with respect to feeling new things.

3. History does repeat itself With Eisuke and MC, it’s important to note that they didn’t know each other at all prior to that fateful meeting at the hotel lobby. They probably hadn’t even talked much and their relationship started from square one. So it’s kind of understandable why Eisuke would still keep his walls up for a LONG time. It takes a while for Eisuke and MC to work through obstacles and establish a degree of trust between them with respect to each other. Whereas with Taki, MC and him already share a history. They were high school sweethearts and Taki and MC both know what the other person was like, and can decipher from a mere few moments that neither of them has changed much over the years, except for having a higher wall around them, owing to their experiences with life in the past. Once Taki and MC realise who the other is, it’s a little bit of awkwardness before they both allow themselves to settle in and be comfortable around each other (even banter a lot lol), because they essentially do know the other person well. Because of that, there’s already a certain degree of trust established between Taki and MC right from the middle of his MS Season 1. That, in turn, leaves less of character development in terms of his relationship with MC when it comes to Taki.

4. Family Backgrounds It’s also important to look at how different their backgrounds are. Eisuke hails from a reputable family, and was adopted into a super rich family as a kid too. He has always dealt with two-faced people and has always had a much more luxurious life from the start. What I’m trying to say is, Eisuke’s not bothered to concern himself with emotions from the very beginning because that’s what’s been ingrained into him from his childhood. Also, because he’s been ultra rich from the start, the MC has more work to do when it comes to making him realise money ain’t everything, my guy. Now with Taki, he has very humble origins. He came from a very normal family, and knows what it’s like to live with just enough money (not being ultra rich, I mean). He was a very normal guy in high school with a very warm group of friends, an incredible girlfriend who he was in love with and a very humble life. His attachment to money came with the debt, when he realised as long as you have money, you have power and as long as you have power, you have everything. MC’s task here was to take him back to his teenage days and make him understand that sometimes, it’s the less expensive things which give you more happiness. 

5. Old Habits Die Hard Now, let’s look at their interactions with the MC. If you’ve noticed, Eisuke is very... hm, how should I put it... non-slangy + formal in the way he speaks. To make more sense of this, Eisuke is very proper when he speaks, and he doesn’t use a lot of phrases like “Man, you’re...” or “God, that was....”. And that’s because it’s been ingrained into him. Eisuke’s vocabulary is very prim and proper and non-slangy because that’s what he’s been taught since childhood. It makes him seem more like a robot, in a sense in the very beginning, in my opinion. Gives him a less relatable vibe, basically (and I mean no hate). Whereas if you look at Taki’s stories, he often uses a lot of phrases like, “God, you’re cute.” or “Man, that was something.” and that’s mainly just his high school, boy next door self showing its form. It makes him more relatable and human in my opinion, and those slangs are what show the reader that yes, the Teenage Taki still exists in there.

6. Won’t Lose You As stated previously, Eisuke hadn’t even known the MC exists till they met in the hotel lobby in the prologue. So when Eisuke and MC start dating, it’s with a perspective of “Okay, now she is my girlfriend.”, which doesn’t allow Eisuke to be very open about his feelings from the start. In case you’re confused, hang in there and let me explain Taki’s side to help you understand better. Now, Taki is MC’s ex. Someone who was very in love with her. Still is. He knows what it’s like to lose the MC, for he had already lost her once, and would do anything and everything to NOT lose her again. Thus, he is relatively more open with his emotions. He let’s her know how much he loves her, values her, cares for her, because he doesn’t want to let her go again, ever.

7. Okay, Let’s Be Direct Eisuke is a very “actions speak louder than words” person. He isn’t very open with his emotions, heck he doesn’t even say “i love you” till MC demands it out of him lmao. He is very indirect in terms of expressing what he feels for the MC, even in his later stories, and it takes time for him to come to terms with the word “love”, in general. If you look at Taki, he has been very direct from the start. Even in high school when he confessed to MC he went “I like you.” and in his MS when MC asked him why he kissed her, he said “Because I love you.” right on her face. He has always been direct with expressing himself, so that leaves a much smaller scope when it comes to him coming to terms with feelings like love and care, et cetera.

8. Different Premises Now, this might be the last point I touch upon. The thing is, both KBTBB and KoP are set in VERY different themes. In KBTBB, the MC is a normal person with a fulfilling life, she gets sold in the auctions, meets the auction managers and her journey starts from there. In KBTBB, MC has to mainly deal with the stress that comes with throwing herself into the dangerous life Eisuke and the other lead, and apart from that her life doesn’t really have much of an angst. In the sense, that none of the action managers have to actually deal with the MC and her emotions, per say. In KoP, the MC goes through a divorce which basically leaves her mentally shattered. She self-doubts and and constantly keeps worrying about what did she do wrong which made things end up the way they did. Here, while the KoP guy and and MC fall in love, it’s also about helping MC realise what happened was not her fault entirely. It’s about connecting deeper, much deeper, on an emotional level with the MC, which gives Taki a sort of a head start when it comes to character development in terms of bonding with the MC. ... I hope that made sense lol

That was a LONG response, not gonna lie, and I’m so sorry for being late with this! But, I hope I was successful in showing you my side of things on this debate. 

Thanks a lot for the ask! <3

[themarveledwriter]

First Encounters

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Warnings: Angst. Panic attacks. Blood. Cursing. Bad writing.

Summary: Sebastian runs into a girl and her dog in the park. She panics.

A/N: Sooo, I’m not dead. I also am out of the hospital! I wrote this in the hospital while feeling GREAT on pain meds so who knows if its good... Anyway. I have A LOT more of this story if you are interested, maybe it could become a series. Also if anyone has a better name... I am open to something different.

You were walking through Stuyvesant Park in Manhattan. It was a smaller park with nice walkways you liked to walk with your Golden Retriever, Winter . You had tried to take him on walks in Central Park when you first moved to New York, but it was way too busy for both you and your dog.

See, Winter was missing a front leg, hence the name. You had always been a Marvel fan, reading first edition Captain America comics with your Grandpa, who was a World War II vet. 

~Flashback~

You had been looking for a service dog for months, to help with chronic pain as well as your anxiety and depression, but you didn’t want to buy a puppy from a store or a breeder. You had almost given up hope on finding a puppy to train when you decided to visit a shelter a few hours outside of the city.

You asked the girl at the front desk if they had any younger dogs, since you needed to be able to train it, and she led you too a few different cages. The first few were all small breeds, Pomeranian, Terriers, Pugs… And while you would have gladly taken all of them if possible, you had to explain to the worker that you were looking for a larger breed to become a service dog. When you said so, her smile widened before dropping from her face.

“We do have one large breed, he’s a Golden Retriever but I don’t think he’d be that great as a service animal.”  The sweet lady said as she walked you out of that room and down a hall. “He’s an amazing pup, he is only seven weeks old and was dropped off a month ago, left in a crate by the front door, we didn’t see him until the next morning… his eyes weren’t even open yet.” She opened a door with a ‘Staff Only’ sign, “We had to separate him from the other dogs, even the small ones. He does great with them, he wants to play and is super friendly, but the other dogs picked on him” She points toward the only occupied cage in the room. 

You looked in the cage and instantly fell in love. There was a little puppy cuddled up in a bed way too big for him, sleeping. When you touched the cage doors, his eyes opened and locked with yours. 

He had two different colored eyes, one brown and one blue. Once he had fully woken up, he tried to approach the cage doors. That's when you realize why the employee didn’t think he’d be a good service dog, why he had to be separated from the other dogs.

He was missing his front left leg. 

It was wrapped in bright red gauze. You looked up at the employee, “What happened to him?” You said, your heart breaking for this little puppy. 

She looked sad, obviously expecting you to not want to adopt him, “We aren’t sure. We think he was probably used as a bait dog because his eyes. He’s a purebred goldie, but the eyes would be called an ‘imperfection’. He’s pretty much totally healed though. The stitches came out two days ago, and the only reason it’s wrapped is because he doesn’t really know how to walk on only three legs yet.”

Your heart was shattered, “Can I hold him?” You say, looking over at the lady. 

She walks over and unlocks the cage, pulling out the little bundle of fluff whose tail starts wagging the second the door opened up.

Right when she hands him to you he reaches his little head up and licks your cheek. You locked eyes with him, his brown and blue meeting your e/c. 

“I’ll take him.”

He was the best dog ever, given the name Winter because of your affinity for Marvel and his lack of a front leg. He quickly learned how to properly run again and became an amazing service dog. 

~End of Flashback~

You and Winter went on a walk at least once a week, as per request by your therapist. You tried your best to always do it, even if it was just a lap around the block.

You weren’t paying attention, letting Winter lead you. You knew he wouldn’t lead you off the path. 

But you weren’t expecting to get rammed into my a brick wall of a man. 

The next thing you knew you were flat on your ass and Winter was licking your cheek, something he often did when you dissociated. 

“I am so sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going, are you okay?” You could hear a familiar sounding voice above you, but you were still in shock.

Dazedly you reply, “Yeah… Yeah I’m okay” Winter finally stops licking you and instead rubs his face against yours. The feeling of his rough collar rubbing against you snapping you out of it.

“Oh my gosh, I am so so sorry,” You say while quickly standing up, black spots taking over your vision causing you to stumble right into the man you already ran into once.

“I can’t beli-” You cut yourself off as you lock eyes with the person who is now holding you in his arms. “Yo-yourrr… Sebastian Stan. Holy… HOLY SHIT.” You say as you push yourself out of his arms. 

When you are an appropriate distance away, you realize what you’d just done.

You could feel your breathing pick up, not quite hyperventilating but quickly getting to that point.

Looking everywhere but his eyes you say, “I am so so sorry. I can’t believe I did that. Winter usually keeps me from hitting people and I didn’t even realize I- I… I can’t breath.” You didn’t feel the panic attack coming until it was too late.

You felt Winter pull out of your grip, running towards the nearest person as he was trained to do when you got like this, it just so happened that the nearest person was Sebastian, the main cause of your panic attack. 

You felt hands on your shoulders, leading you forward towards a bench. Once you were sat down you felt Winter pull your medication pack off of your backpack. You had this specially made for him so that he could give the bag to the person you were with, and they could give you the pills. 

Sebastian was talking but there was no sound reaching your ears until you hear the pill bottle shake. He held one of your pills in front of you, and you shakily tried to grab it, knocking it on the floor. He got another one out and put it directly in your mouth.

You sat there for what felt like hours, trying to ground yourself. Winter was licking your face and your hands were buried deep in his fur. You weren’t even sure Sebastian was still there until the attack subsided, and you felt his hand rubbing comforting circles on your back. 

“I’m- I am so… sorry.” You choke out between gasps for air.

“Shhhh, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s fine. What’s your name?” Sebastian says, his other hand reaching and petting Winter, who was now investigating the person touching his mom since the crisis was averted. 

“Y/n, my names Y/n.” You say, looking up at Sebastian and trying to keep your voice steady and breaths calm.

Sebastian smiles at you, now that he can see your face, “Y/n, that’s a really pretty name. I’m Sebastian, but I am guessing you already knew that.” Is he blushing?

You remembered shoving him after recognizing his face, right before you had a panic attack and broke down in front of him… Oh God no.

You gape at him before quickly looking away, trying to speak but not being able to. 

“Hey no, no it’s okay. You did nothing wrong, I ran into you!” He quickly says, trying to make you feel more comfortable.

“But I wasn’t watching where I was going,” You whimper.

You were so embarrassed, -What the fuck is wrong with me?- You think, looking towards Winter when tears well up in your eyes.

Sebastian grabs your hand and tugs, forcing you to look at him as a tear makes its way down your face, following the tear tracks from your panic attack “Hey! Nothing is wrong with you!”

Shit you must have said that out loud. 

For some reason this made you mad, mad at yourself and your body, but you took it out on him. 

You could tell when your facial expression changed to anger, as he looked even more concerned, “Nothing’s wrong? Nothing’s wrong!? I not only just rammed into you, but had a full blown panic attack in front of you because you’re famous! You had to feed me my fucking medicine and comfort me while I am sobbing and snotting all over! Do you know how embarrassed I am!? Why did you even stay?”

He looked at you with a confused face, “What do you take me for? An asshole that leaves a girl in distress just sitting in the middle of the park? Y/n… I would never do that to anyone, especially someone that I caused to have a panic attack.” He looks ashamed and it instantly wipes away your anger.

You both sat in silence for almost ten minutes, the only noise coming from the park around you and Winter, who was still panting from calming you down.

“You didn’t cause my panic attack.” You whisper.

Sebastian looks at you, “What?” You lock eyes with him, “You didn’t cause my panic attack. I have really bad mental… issues, and today has just been a bad day. I thought I could work through it but I knew I shouldn’t come out today.”

“Y/n you shouldn’t have to worry about that. You seem like a sweet girl and I am really sorry you are going through this. But… It seems like you have a pretty good friend to help you out.” He says, pointing towards Winter. “He’s a Golden Retriever right? What’s his name?”

You groan internally, “Ugh, this is so awkward.” You say, giggling a little when you see his confused face. He tilted his head to the side, a lot like a confused puppy. “His name’s Winter… I thought it was the perfect name since he’s missing his left front leg.”

It’s very obvious when Sebastian blushes this time, a bright red flush rushing up his neck. “Wow, so you really are a fan huh.” He says to you, your face quickly matching his, “Come here Winter, can I pet you?” 

Winter bounds up to him, excited to have a new friend. Sebastian is petting him when a group of girls with cameras show up.

They started asking him for pictures, saying how much they loved him and making you feel extremely awkward. You knew you still looked a mess from earlier, so while he was talking to his fans, you started walking the other way. Looking back once and locking eyes with him. For some reason you thought he looked sad, but you were probably just being hopeful.

~Sebastian’s POV~

Y/n.

Such a pretty name. 

Pretty name to match a pretty face, even with tears streaming down it.  He probably would have used a cheesy pick-up line on any other girl. 

But not Y/n.

Not the girl that just had a panic attack in his arms. Not the girl who cursed at him and yelled despite knowing who he was. Not the girl that named her service dog after his character.

He loved his fans, he really did, but right now they were getting on his nerves. He just wanted to talk to Y/n… To this girl he just met but was already so enamored by.

He took pictures with the girls, trying to keep his eye on Y/n’s back as she walked away. Locking eyes with her once more before she turned a corner and was blocked by the trees.

The girls surrounding him were talking, but he wasn’t really listening.

Eventually he couldn’t take it, he didn’t want to lose her. 

“I’m sorry, I really need to go. It was great to meet you!” He says to the girls surrounding him while starting to back away.

While most of his fans were understanding, there was always one that thought they were entitled to more. 

The majority of the group said their goodbyes, but one girl rolled her eyes. “Why? So you can follow that girl who was crying? What, is she your girlfriend?” She stepped closer to Sebastian, grinning. “You could just stay with me, I’m sure I am a lot more fun.”

He stepped away and turned around, “It doesn’t matter what I am doing or if I am following her or not. I need to go, enjoy your picture!”

As he ran after Y/n he heard the girl behind him make an irritated noise, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to catch up to Y/n.

Good thing he was in running gear.

~Y/n’s POV~

You were walking along the path, not really paying attention even though that is what got her into this mess. You just wanted to get to your car and go home. 

You were almost to your car when someone grabbed your shoulder. 

You may have screamed, but you definitely turned and punched the person who grabbed you square in the nose.

“Holy shit! What the fuck Y/n?” A familiar voice says, muffled through his hands that are covering his now bleeding nose and mouth.

Shit, it was Sebastian. Why the fuck did he grab you?

You ran forward and put your hand under his chin, gently tipping his face up towards yours. 

“I am so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention and you startled me!” You weren’t sure what to do, there was blood going everywhere. Winter was trying to jump up on Sebastian, sensing his pain.

Sebastian looks up, “Sorry, I shouldn’t have grabbed you. I just didn’t want you to get away from me.” You were confused, “Why? I was just heading home… I live really close to here, do you wanna come? I can clean you up and I probably have clothes there that would fit you… I kinda ruined your shirt.”

Sebastian looked up at you, “You sure? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Say no.

Say you changed your mind.

You give the man in front of you a small smile, “Yeah, definitely!”

Wait… What? What the fuck did you just do?

[today-only-happens-once]

Exposure Therapy

Title: Exposure Therapy

Word Count: 3281

Summary: If Roman can practice enough scenarios, maybe the inevitable will hurt a little less. Hurt/Comfort Romantic Prinxiety. Ace!Roman.

Warnings: aphobia/internalized aphobia as a central focus, angst/hurt/comfort (heavy on all three), scenarios of rejection, crying, cursing, misunderstanding.

A/N: I wrote this in one sitting. One of those fics that comes from a personal space. An exploration of internalized aphobia—something that I’ve begun to learn does not go away after realizing you are ace. Edited by yours truly, so all mistakes are mine. <3 Love you all.

Tags: @creativenostalgiastuff, @helloisthisusernametaken, @ren-allen, @quoth-the-sparrow, @princelogical, @random-pianist, @ravenclawicecream, @erlenmeyertrash, @milomeepit, @at-least-seven-pretty-potatoes, @rileyfirstname, @pinkeasteregg, @sassy-in-glasses, @vigilantvirgil, @generalfandomfabulousness, @lacrimosathedark, @thepoolofthedead, @monikastec, @heir-of-the-founders, @yourworstnightmare999, @artistictaurean, @kanejandkruge , @cdragontogacotar, @damienswifeolicitydallysgirl, @angst-patton, @savingshae, @noneed4thistbh, @awesomelissawho, @unikornavenger, @bopthesnoz, @spiralofsilencetheory, @finger-gunsss, @crownswriter123, @swlotakulady34, @gaylotusthatexists, @analogical-mess, @dolphidragon

…

Roman stares unseeing at the carpet right in front of Virgil’s sock-clad feet. Most of the lights are off, leaving only the lamp by the couch to cast the room in a soft warm glow. Part of Roman wishes he could turn it off and disappear into the darkness. Anything to avoid the confused, hurt look in Virgil’s eyes that he can feel pressing down on his shoulders.

“You’re ace?” Virgil’s voice seems to echo with disgust.

“I’m sorry, Virgil—” Roman reaches a hand out blindly. Virgil takes a step back.

He shoves his hands harshly into the pocket of his hoodie. “So… So what, you were just leading me on? This entire time? I mean…” He waves an arm. “What the hell, Roman?”

Roman clenches his jaw as his eyes burn. He blinks hard to clear them. “That wasn’t my intention. I just… I was just scared—”

Virgil scoffs. “Scared? Grow up, Princey.”

“Virge, I—”

Virgil is crossing the room and for the briefest second, Roman thinks maybe he’s walking towards him. But the Anxious Side brushes past Roman and starts to head up the stairs. “Save it. I don’t think this is gonna work out.” Then he’s gone. He’s vanished up the stairs and the Prince stands in the Commons alone with the silence until he hears Virgil slam his door shut.

Roman breathes out shakily. He presses a hand to his mouth as it if might steady the air leaving his lungs.

“Again,” he says aloud once he’s sure the word won’t tremble. “The kitchen, this time.”

The scene blurs around him in a swirl of fragmenting color. Roman waits, closing his eyes and bringing clarity to the image in his mind as it takes shape around him. He takes a few slow breaths before he opens his eyes. The kitchen is a perfect recreation of the one in the Mindscape that mirrors Thomas’s apartment.

Sunlight streams in through the window beside the refrigerator. Roman frowns, willing the sun to start setting. He doesn’t think he’d have this conversation in the middle of the day. He’d wait until the evening at least. The bright light fades into a soft orange and pink.

Roman swallows, bracing himself as he hears quiet footsteps behind him. He forces a small smile as he turns around.

“Virgil,” he greets, perhaps a little too brightly. “How are you, darling?”

Virgil quirks a suspicious eyebrow as he shuffles into the kitchen and grabs a mug from the cabinet. “Fine,” he says slowly. “Why are you acting weird?”

Roman swallows, trying to ignore the part of him that suddenly feels like throwing up. “I was wondering if you had a moment to talk.”

Roman sees the slightly defensive curl of Virgil’s shoulders around himself. “That’s never a good sign.”

“No, it’s—It’s nothing, really,” Roman tells him. He doesn’t know if it’s a lie. It feels like one. “But… well, can we sit?”

“Sure,” Virgil says slowly again, eyeing Roman as he takes a seat at the kitchen table. “But I’ll be honest, Princey, you’re kinda worrying me.”

“I’m sorry.” Roman folds his hands on the table and stares at them. “I just… we’ve been dating for a while now, and… there’s something that I’ve been pushing off telling you. And by doing so… I’m… maybe not being fair to you.”

Roman pauses, glancing up at Virgil across the table from him. The Anxious Side doesn’t say anything, instead opting to quirk an eyebrow at him as a silent encouragement to continue. Roman takes a breath. He squeezes his hands together as if he might be able to ground himself and keep the sudden wave of nausea at bay.

“I am asexual.”

Silence. Roman waits, every muscle braced for the inevitable.

“You’re unbelievable, Roman.” The edge in Virgil’s voice makes Roman suddenly want to be anywhere else. He stays rooted to his seat instead. “I mean, you know as well as I do that ‘asexuality’ or whatever the hell you want to call it isn’t a real thing.”

The chair scraping against the floor sounds like a scream. Roman thinks he can feel something breaking inside of him. He opens his mouth to speak—to explain—but the lump in this throat hardens before he can even get out Virgil’s name.

Virgil continues, oblivious. “I mean, I know you like to stand out, but c’mon. You can drop the whole ‘special snowflake’ label.”

“I—” Roman tries, but Virgil is gone.

The Creative Side scrubs a hand against burning eyes, gritting his teeth. “Again.”

The scene blurs, then clears.

It’s a nighttime picnic this time: a stargazing date, tailored specifically to Virgil. It’s one of their go-to places in the Mindscape when they wanted to go on a date. The first time Roman had suggested it and Virgil had agreed, the Prince had consulted Logan for how to make it as accurate as possible.

It’s quiet between them. A soft breeze plays in Virgil’s long bangs as he stares up at the sky. He looks peaceful. Content. Happy.

“Virgil… I’m ace,” Roman blurts out before he can lose his nerve entirely.

Virgil turns an incredulous, disbelieving gaze onto him. “You’re what?”

Roman’s hands curl against the blanket beneath them. “I’m… asexual.”

Virgil snorts, and Roman suddenly wishes he could dissolve into the ground. The Anxious Side shakes his head. “No, you aren’t.”

The Creative Side gathers what courage he has left and straightens up slightly. “Yes. I am.”

“Roman, you’re the Romantic Side. You can’t have it both ways.” Virgil shakes his head dismissively, looking back up at the sky. “I mean… nobody would want that, realistically.”

“But—”

“Like, I can wait until you’re comfortable or whatever but… you’re going to be comfortable with it eventually.” He can feel Virgil’s suddenly piercing, demanding stare boring into him. “Right?”

“Right.” Roman’s voice sounds small even to his own ears.  

The world blurs. Then clears. A dinner date.

“Sex is like, a basic human need, Roman.”

“Again.”

A swirl of colors. The hallway.

“How do you know if you’ve never done it before? You’re just scared. You’ll come around eventually.”

“Again.”

Roman’s room.

“I need someone who can actually love me like an adult, Roman.”

“Again.”

Virgil’s room.

“You’ll be alone forever if you don’t get used to it.”

The voices start to overlap, all of them Virgil’s, each harsher than the last. The world is blurry and Roman doesn’t know when he fell to his knees but he can’t bring any clarity to the space around him. The images swirl and Roman has his eyes screwed shut but all he can picture is Virgil’s face.

He buries his fingertips in his hair and covers his ears with his palms. Anything to block out the overlapping, deafening voices that ricochet around him.

He thinks he can hear his name being called—it sounds a little different from the rest of the voices—but it’s all unmistakably Virgil and Roman can’t bring himself to do anything but stay still. His stomach is rolling. A sob is fighting to break through his chest but Roman fights it down.

The voices are right, after all.

Then Roman feels real, solid hands on him, covering his own hands on his head. His eyes fly open, jarred by the sudden contact that feels too real to be part of the Imagination. The confusion gives way to a caving feeling in his chest. It’s just Virgil, kneeling in front of him. Roman can’t see him that clearly—the world is blurry, but he could place that purple and black faltering image anywhere.

It makes sense, Roman supposes. He’d been picturing Virgil in his mind, after all.

He feels Virgil pull him against his chest. It somehow hurts more. The voices are still raging around him and the colors are swirling but Roman collapses a little into Virgil’s chest that feels so real and warm and solid. It’s not real, it can’t be, but it cracks something inside of Roman. The sob he’d been fighting releases in a sharp burst.

“Hey, hey, hey. I’ve got you,” says one of Virgil’s voices but it sounds softer than the rest of them. Closer somehow, too.

For a moment, Roman feels like his stomach drops suddenly. The feeling is followed immediately by a silence so sudden it leaves Roman’s ears ringing. The voices have stopped. And a moment later, Roman realizes that the warm, solid, tangible feeling of someone else didn’t disappear with the voices.

Roman sucks in a hiccupping, shaking breath. Then he opens his eyes. A purple shirt. A black and purple-plaid-patched hoodie sleeve. He breathes in and catches the scent of laundry detergent and something he couldn’t quite pinpoint but was nevertheless familiar. Virgil.

Just past Virgil, Roman can see his canopy bed with red and gold pillows. They’re in his room. Out of the Imagination.

Roman pulls away from Virgil, flushing bright red. He ducks his head when he can feel Virgil’s gaze on him. He feels small. He doesn’t know how much Virgil—the real Virgil—heard. Or what he’d think of Roman now.

Which is stupid, Roman thinks to himself. Because that was exactly why you were doing that in the first place, Princey.

“Hey,” Virgil says in a soft voice. In his peripheral, Roman sees Virgil reach a hand up towards him, then seems to think twice. Roman’s chest constricts impossibly tighter. “You okay?” he asks quietly instead.

“I’m fine,” Roman manages.

“Bullshit.”

“Then why’d you ask?” He can’t bring himself to look above Virgil’s chest. He can’t look him in the eyes. He can’t. Coward, a voice hisses in the back of his mind.

There’s a pause. Then a sigh. Roman feels a hand against his cheek. The pad of a thumb brushing at the wetness of Roman’s cheeks. “Because I thought it was a nicer way to ask what the hell you were doing,” Virgil replies.  

Roman swallows. “Practicing.” He stares at the pattern in the light hardwood floor beneath his knees.

“Practicing? For what?”

Roman opens his mouth to answer. Now’s your chance to tell him. Just come out and tell him you’re ace. The words get lost somewhere along the way up his throat. Roman closes his mouth and shakes his head and says something easier instead. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Roman,” Virgil says, more firmly this time. “Look at me.”

“It’s fine, Virgil. I’m fine—”

“Ro, please.”

Roman’s eyes flit up to latch onto Virgil’s. His brows are pulled together in concern, and his gaze bores into Roman’s like he’s searching for something he can’t find. He still has his hand against Roman’s cheek and the Prince wants to both lean into it and pull away. He stays still instead.

“I’m sorry,” Roman finds himself saying. He swallows down the urge to repeat those words again and again and again. As if this Virgil—the real one—had been the one he’d hurt over and over and over…

Virgil swallows. “What was I saying to you back there?”

The Creative Side freezes, then blinks quickly to recover. “Nothing of importance.”

“Stop doing that,” Virgil snaps, something sharp flashing through his eyes. “I know it was my voice, Roman. But I was a little… preoccupied to make out what I was saying.”

“It was my own fault, really,” Roman tells him in a whisper. He stops, then tries to clear his throat and speaks a little louder. “I just thought… maybe if I could… get used to all of the bad options, I’d be better prepared for the inevitable, you know?”

“Bad options?” Virgil shakes his head. “What does that mean?”

Roman averts his gaze. He feels suddenly very tired. “Nothing. Just… I was just… practicing a conversation.” He pulls away from Virgil’s hand against his jaw.

Virgil’s hand hovers in the air a moment before curling and falling into his lap. “A conversation with me?”

Roman sighs. “Yeah.”

“A conversation… about what?” There’s something off about Virgil’s voice, but it’s all Roman can do to keep talking and not run entirely.

He takes in a deep breath. It’s still a little shaky, and Roman curls his hands against his thighs. “About… me. About the fact that I’m…. asexual.”

There’s a beat—there’s always a beat, always a pause, always the calm right before the storm—and Roman wants to push off the inevitable anger, pain, hurt as long as he can so he lets the words spill past his lips.

“And I know I should have told you a long time ago, but it just never seemed like an okay time. But I know that’s stupid, and it wasn’t fair to you, and I totally led you on, but I just thought maybe eventually it would come up, or you would ask and I could just say ‘yes’ because that’s easier, I guess. It’s easier to confirm than to announce something like that, because if I announce it then it changes everything and I didn’t want anything to change, I didn’t want you to look at me differently because when you look at me I feel like I could do anything and—”

“You…” Virgil cuts in and Roman’s jaw snaps shut, cutting off the words with an almost audible snap. “You were… you were practicing coming out scenarios where I react badly, weren’t you?” The question is asked carefully. Measured. Like something sits just below the surface of it but Roman doesn’t know what lies beneath.

The prince carefully avoids Virgil’s gaze. He nods wordlessly.

“Why?” Roman doesn’t understand why Virgil’s voice sounds a little choked.

Roman laughs but it’s breathy and airy and humorless, tied carefully together with a thread of self-loathing. “Because… I thought it’d make it more bearable when it actually comes. Thought maybe I’d be less of a coward or something if I’ve already sat through it once.”

“Roman… listen...”

And here it comes. The storm is back, the calm abated. And Roman wonders if the practice actually helped because it is hard to imagine a feeling more painful than the one in his chest at this moment. He’s staring unseeing at the rips in Virgil’s jeans. He thinks maybe this is for the best after all. Virgil will find someone he can be happy with—maybe Logan, maybe Patton—and Roman is better off alone, anyway, right? He can go on adventures, avoid distractions and focus on creating—

“I’m so sorry,” Virgil says. His voice sounds thick.

Roman’s throat is tightening. “Don’t be,” he says hollowly because it’s all he has left. He just wants to go to sleep. He’s been through this scenario dozens of times now. This is just one more, he tells himself as if it will alleviate some of the crushing feeling. “I get it.”

“What?” Virgil’s confusion rings clear in his voice, but it’s shadowed a second later by realization. “Wait… shit, Roman, that’s not what I meant—”

“Virgil, I don’t really need a long speech or anything,” Roman tells him, scrubbing a hand down his face. “It’s okay. I’m not mad at you.”

“I am.”

Roman blinks, his gaze flitting up to meet Virgil’s. His brow creases in confusion at the bright, earnest look in Virgil’s eyes. “What?”

Virgil rakes a hand back through his hair. There’s something a little pained in Virgil’s eyes that makes Roman’s chest twist. Roman opens his mouth—he wants to apologize, he never wanted to be a source of pain for Virgil again—but Virgil holds up a hand to cut him off.

“I… You were so afraid to tell me that you’re ace, Roman. And I feel like that’s on me. I mean, you were calling my rejection of you—of who you are—‘inevitable’, for crying out loud. I never…” Virgil’s voice seems to die in his throat. He swallows, blinks hard, then tries again. “If I made it seem like you couldn’t come out to me, after everything… I mean, God, you were torturing yourself over it…”

“Not you,” Roman blurts out. Virgil stops suddenly, and Roman struggles to find the words again. “It wasn’t you. I just… I’ve heard some variation of all of it before. And I just… I was scared. Not because of anything you did or said, but just… rejection seems inevitable at this point.” Is he making sense? Roman doesn’t know. But he keeps talking because at this point, if he stops now, he thinks maybe he’ll never say it again.

“It’s… everywhere,” Roman presses on, silently begging Virgil to understand. “It’s supposed to be important to me, right? And sometimes I think life would be easier if it was, but…” Roman’s eyes are starting to burn a little again. “I don’t want it, and I don’t…” want to lose you. Roman can’t bring himself to voice it. He can’t have it both ways. That was really what being ace meant, right? Roman had come to accept that a long time ago. He shakes his head, wrapping his arms around himself. “But it’s not fair to you to keep lying. To keep you waiting for something I’m never going to want. You… deserve someone who can love you in all the ways you need—” Roman cuts himself off when Virgil cups his face in both of his hands.

Virgil’s dark gaze is searching his again, something imploring behind his irises. “I have that already.”

Wait… what?

Virgil reads the uncertainty on Roman’s face and softens, leaning his forehead against Roman’s . “You are ace, Roman. That’s part of who you are. It’s not something you should apologize for, and it’s sure as hell not something you should punish yourself for.”

“I… Virgil—”

“You love me,” Virgil continues with quiet, unwavering conviction. “You show me literally every single day. You make me coffee in the morning and know to sneak in two spoonfuls of sugar when nobody is watching. You check in on me when I’m having a bad day. You distract me with Disney theories when I’m getting overwhelmed. You listen when I need to vent or talk no matter how busy you are. You plan dates with me specifically in mind. You write me love letters on like, a weekly basis, and you let me fall asleep listening to your heartbeat when I’m having a bad night.”

Roman feels Virgil press soft lips to his forehead. “I love you,” Roman finds himself saying.

“I know,” Virgil replies softly. “That is all the love I need, Ro. I promise.” He touches his forehead to Roman’s again.

Roman swallows. “But—”

“Do you trust me?”

Roman manages a watery smile at the Disney reference. “What?”

He can hear the soft smile in the Anxious Side’s voice too. “Do you trust me?”

Roman nods a little and pulls back to look up at Virgil. “Yes.”

“Good.” Virgil looks straight into Roman’s eyes as he brushes his thumb along Roman’s cheek. “Then trust me when I say that you are enough. You will always be enough, just as you are.”

[fullmetalscullyy]

the way it was - chapter 22

summary:  what if riza never went to war?  riza hawkeye has just married the man she loves. six months into their marriage, an unexpected surprise stops her from following roy to the military. a canon divergence au that explores what might have happened had riza been unable to join the military. there will be plenty of family fluff, angst, and royai.

rated: m | warnings: no archive warning apply

read on ao3

1914

but you're a king and i'm a lionheart

When Chris had invited Riza and Mia around to the bar for dinner, Riza didn’t expect her daughter to be whisked away immediately by Vanessa as soon as they set foot inside the bar. Chris approached with determination.

“We need to talk.”

Anxiety settled in Riza’s stomach. What was all this about? There was no room for argument as Chris turned on her heel and walked away, expecting Riza to follow.

Riza wondered if this had something to do with Roy. He’d suddenly called shortly after arriving at work that morning to say that he wouldn’t be home until late that night. He had some work to do, but he was sorry, and he loved them both. She didn’t think much of it, just told him to be safe and got on with her day. Then, Chris called shortly afterwards, encouraging Riza to come for dinner. While she thought it would be lovely to spend the evening with her mother-in-law, there was a tiny niggle in the back of her mind that something was happening behind the scenes.

Chris led the way through to the backroom of the bar, into her home. She led Riza into her kitchen without any kind of indication of what the topic of discussion would be, and that made the wait worse. Was this something she needed to worry about? Riza’s thoughts were interrupted by Mia’s happy squeal from somewhere in the house, followed by Vanessa’s laugh.

Uncertainty clawed at Riza’s heart. She wanted to ask what was going on but knew better. Everything Chris did was for a reason, so if she was leading Riza away from Mia then it was something their daughter shouldn’t overhear. Riza bit her tongue.

Once inside the kitchen, Chris gestured for Riza to sit.

“Roy will be working late tonight, but I’m sure you already know about that.”

“He called this morning,” Riza confirmed.

Chris nodded. “He’s going to do something tonight, and wanted you brought here as a precaution.”

“What’s he doing?” Riza asked. Her stomach tightened at the serious look on Chris’ face.

“He’s going to fake someone’s death using his flame alchemy.” There was no hesitation, she stated it as bluntly as she could.

“Oh…" Riza's heart thudded inside her chest at the revelation. "Wait.” Riza paused, something clicking inside of her mind. “Does this have anything to do with Maria Ross?”

It had been all over the papers for a few days. Apparently the soldier had killed Maes Hughes. Initially, Riza had scrutinised the photo and wondered how that woman could have taken someone else’s life. She’d been an exemplary soldier, according to the news, so why would she murder one of her own? The story didn’t quite add up for Riza, and it didn’t for Roy either.

They hadn’t spoken much about it. They didn’t get a chance really when Mia was around. However, he’d spent more time in his study in the evenings after Mia had gone to bed. Riza would pop her head in and ask if he needed anything, only to be greeted by a tired smile and the reassurance he was all right. She’d spotted Maes’ name on the papers in front of him, alongside Maria Ross', which Roy had quickly scribbled down then scored out. Riza knew he was investigating his friend’s death and was worried for him. Roy explained he couldn’t do it at work, so would spend an hour or two looking over things. Sometimes Riza offered her own input but couldn’t do much. She had a good eye for details but wasn’t in investigations. Still, she could be someone he could talk to about it all.

Chris nodded. “It does. He’s going to fake her death tonight.”

“How though?” Maria Ross was in prison. What was he up to?

“He’s staging a prison break and will “kill” her.” Chris used finger quotations to explain herself.

Riza swallowed.

“It’s all staged though, don’t worry. He has a dummy at the ready that I helped procure the ingredients for. Breda came to me with some things he needed, and I helped the operation along. Havoc will protect Ross and help get her out of the country.”

“So, why bring Mia and I here?”

“Roy asked if I could invite you for dinner, partly as a precaution but also because he probably felt guilty he wouldn’t be home tonight.”

Riza nodded, things falling into place. He had sounded regretful on the phone earlier when he said he wouldn’t be home.

“Why is us being out of the house a precaution?”

Chris shrugged. “Beats me, but I have a pretty good theory.”

“What is it?”

She regarded Riza quietly for a long moment, which only caused frustration to build.

“Chris, please. If my daughter is in some kind of danger then I deserve to know what it is.”

She eyed Riza once more before nodding. “There’s dangerous people roaming around Central right now. They each bear a matching tattoo. An Ouroboros tattoo. They’re tied to the military somehow, but we don’t know why yet.”

Ouroboros… Riza had seen that word mentioned before, years ago in an ancient history book. She was sure it had been in her father’s study. “What does the tattoo look like?” At the mention of a tattoo, her back tingled lightly as a reminder. She hadn’t discussed any form of tattoo with anyone in a long time. They weren’t popular around Amestris, so weren’t a regular topic of conversation.

“A snake eating its own tail.”

That definitely sounded familiar to Riza. She was sure she’d seen it on Roy’s desk at home, half-hidden by other pieces of paper.

“And these people pose a threat?”

Chris nodded. “We don’t know who they’re targeting, but yes, they do. Just be cautious, all right? Know that if you ever need anything, I’m just a call away as well.”

Riza sat back in her chair.

“I have no reason to believe they will contact you personally, however, just keep an eye out," Chris warned.

“I will,” she swallowed. She was still in a daze from all this new information. It was weighing on her heavily. If Roy was targeted by them, who was to say they wouldn’t use her or Mia to get to him? She shuddered at the thought.

“Roy Boy asked if I could at least fill you in on what was going on tonight, and promised he’d answer any questions you had as soon as possible,” Chris added. “He sent me a coded message earlier and then a quick call. I have the letter if you want to see it?”

Curiosity got the better of her, and Riza nodded.

As Chris left the room Riza remained in place, processing the information she’d been given tonight.

This was… big. Riza knew of his plan to get to the top and was well aware of everything that entailed now, but… Now it was real. He was taking steps here that, if found out, could get him court-martialled. Her stomach twisted. But she knew him, and she knew his team. They were smart as hell. And if Chris was on their side too, helping them along, it eased Riza’s worries a little bit.

“I also have this, if you could pass it onto him?” Chris handed her an envelope along with the piece of paper. The front was blank, giving nothing away. “More information for him.”

This was usual practice between them both. Over the years when Riza and Mia had gone to visit Chris and Roy’s sisters, messages in letters had been passed onto Riza to be delivered to Roy. Riza knew he’d been overreacting when he insisted on not getting her involved in anything. And she’d been right. What was so dangerous about picking up a handful of envelopes to hand over to her husband?

“I will.”

“I’ll get us a drink.” Chris excused herself and left Riza with Roy’s coded letter.

It was a story. There were various names on the paper, each one starting with a specific letter at the beginning. Those letters were used to spell out the words of his message. Riza didn’t bother to read the story he’d crafted. The message itself was all that held her attention at that moment.

 Jailbreak MR. Get Riza and Mia for dinner. Love both.

 She smiled at the last part, her finger stroking over the paper.

Sometimes Riza would read the story just to see how he managed to fit it all together. Riza had tried it too in her spare time, leaving little notes for him in his office at home. Then he'd started doing it as well without a word of warning. His were far cuter than hers, with a message of ‘I love you’ left all over the house. Soon, it was common practice and they’d shown Mia how to do it too. Her messages weren’t long or complex, but it was just a bit of fun for the small family.

“He’s a dramatic one,” Chris snorted. “Jailbreak,” she muttered. “I don’t know where he got that flair from.”

Riza laughed. “He used to always tell me it was from you and wondered how I couldn’t see it.”

Chris shook her head and lifted her eyes to the ceiling. “He’s a strange one, that’s for sure.”

“He certainly knows how to keep us on our toes,” Riza murmured, turning her focus back to his letter.

“He didn’t want to speak to you about it over the phone, is my guess. Too many people potentially listening in.”

“I know,” Riza reassured her. “I just hope tonight goes well for all involved.”

“That fake corpse was perfectly constructed,” Chris replied, sipping at her water. Her cigarette was absent from her lips. “And Roy, having a flair for dramatics, will make sure it’s well presented.”

Riza’s stomach turned. “Where are they taking Maria?” she asked, trying to turn the conversation away from the “corpse”.

“No idea. That was need to know only.”

Humming in agreement, Riza took a sip of her own water.

“I had another reason for bringing you here tonight, Riza.”

“Oh?”

“You’ve expressed interest in the part of becoming a part-time informant.”

She nodded. “I have.”

“Have you ever been interested in working the floor? You can absolutely say no,” Chris added, lifting her hands in front of her to placate any objections. “All you’d have to do is sit and talk to people.”

Riza cocked her head and considered it. Then grimaced. “No. The whole reason for me to come and collect the messages from you and the girls was to stop people thinking Roy was cheating on me by going out on “dates” with them. What would happen if word got out at his place of work that his wife was cheating on him?”

“A fair point, and a very good answer,” Chris chipped in. “However, I suppose I worded that incorrectly. Let me rephrase that, would you be interested in talking to people to gather information rather than simply collecting messages?”

“In what way?”

“Military wives love to gossip. They come in every Friday night. While their husbands sit in the bar, we have a space for them to catch up and basically moan about their partners for a couple of hours. It’s in the back of the bar, in that room just off to the right as you go out.”

Riza had noticed the door there but hadn’t thought much more of it. She’d never been through there.

“Your upstart Colonel husband would be a good talking point for those ladies,” Chris ventured.

“Are you asking me to gossip about my husband?” Riza frowned.

“Not at all, but you would be welcomed into their social circle openly. Roy Boy is certainly making a name for himself, especially after coming to Central, and he’s a hot topic of conversation.”

Riza wasn’t sure she liked the sound of that. “Only good things, I hope?”

“Of course. Mostly because he’s a breath of fresh air with all the old stuffy military officials that usually frequent their company.”

She still wasn’t sure she liked the sound of that. “And I assume these conversations are all innocent?”

Chris shook her head. “Riza, all those women are old enough to be Roy’s mother,” she chuckled. “They dote on him because he’s a kind kid who's friendly and polite to everyone. Always the charmer," she snorted. "Vanessa very quickly put an end to any possible… not so innocent thoughts. She went in there one Friday gushing about Roy’s beautiful wife and his adorable daughter.”

She laughed when Riza’s cheeks turned pink at the compliment, and Riza coughed to hide it.

“I’m not jealous,” Riza assured Chris. “I just don’t want pointless gossip to ruin his reputation.”

“If anything, they love your little family even more now. They ate it up. It’s the truth, of course, but they really do say nothing but good things, I promise. The girls covering the party make sure of it.” Chris sat back in her chair. “It was just an idea,” she relented. “Some other way for you to help. Military wives on a Friday night can be very animated, and I thought you stopping by would get them to open up even more. It’s completely up to yourself," she relented. "It can be a onetime thing or a regular occurrence. It was just something to try."

“I’ll consider it,” Riza stated carefully. She’d need to weigh her options and if she could find someone to look after Mia if Roy was working.

“That’s all I ask. Roy told me a while back you were interested in being an informant, and the idea occurred to me after that last Friday night.”

“What happened last Friday night?”

“Lots more oohing and ahing over your perfect family,” she smirked. “Honestly, they eat it up Riza. You should come and see it for yourself someday.”

“Are you suggesting we’re not perfect,” Riza quipped, smiling over the rim of her glass.

“No one is perfect,” Chris replied with her own smirk. “But they are correct. You are a beautiful woman and Mia is extremely adorable.”

Chris guffawed while Riza mumbled her thanks at another compliment from her. She was sure Chris only did it because she got a kick out of it.

“Every word of that is the truth,” Chris stated assuredly. “Come on, let’s go and see what Mia’s up to. See if she’s tired out Vanessa yet,” she chuckled.

*          *          *

Mia was half asleep as she walked up the stairs to her bedroom. The offer to remain at Chris’ for the night was there, but Mia had school tomorrow morning so it would be easier for Riza to just take her home. Her mother-in-law had also offered Roxanne’s protection. While Riza appreciated it and welcomed the determined and eager look on Roxanne’s face, she politely declined the offer.

Riza had only been in bed for fifteen minutes or so before she heard the front door opening. Her body tensed in its half-asleep state, but relaxed when she heard Roy sigh from downstairs. Lights were turned off as he climbed the stairs. With heavy footsteps, he reached the top of the stairs but stopped outside Mia’s bedroom door. Riza heard it creak open as he checked in on her. The house turned silent as he did so.

Their bedroom door opened and Riza looked up. Like his footfalls suggested, he looked exhausted, but he still offered her a smile.

“Hi,” he greeted. Roy’s voice sounded a little hoarse as he spoke, discarding his military jacket over the back of the armchair on his side of the bed.

“Hey,” she smiled. “How did it go?”

“Everything went well. The plan went off without a hitch.”

Roy kicked his trousers off and placed it over his jacket on the chair. His shirt however was discarded into a pile on the floor, so he remained in only his boxers. Climbing into bed, Roy wrapped his arms around Riza tightly, giving her a squeeze. A kiss was pressed to her forehead and Riza sighed into it, her body relaxing now she knew that he was home.

“Maria is safe?”

Roy nodded. “On her way to Xerxes.”

“Xerxes? That’s quite a distance,” she commented, racking her brain to try and think how far through the desert that was.

“We’ve determined that whoever is behind it all is working throughout Amestris,” Roy yawned. “I wanted to be safe. I have some associates from Xing, and they’ll escort her there.”

“And are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he mumbled tiredly.

“Chris told me what you had to do with the… corpse.” Riza grimaced. Her tired mind couldn’t think of a better or more tactful way to word it.

“It was fine. I saved someone’s life tonight, that’s what matters,” he yawned again, but his expression quickly turned pained. “I did become the villain for doing it though.”

“How come?”

“Edward always seems to be in the wrong place at the right time,” he mumbled. “He saw me ‘killing’ Ross. I had no idea who was tailing him or if he was compromised so I had to go with the murder story.”

“I’m sorry, Roy.”

“It’s all right,” he sighed. “But thank you. The kid hates me for sure now,” Roy chuckled. “But he’ll be on his way to Xerxes soon enough too so he can find out the truth.” His eyelids fluttered closed.

Riza looked up as his eyelashes splayed across his cheeks and his face finally relaxed. The day’s events had been weighing on him, and she was loath to take up any more of his sleeping time.

“Get some rest, Roy,” she breathed, pressing a kiss to his lips.

He grunted softly in response, deepening the kiss for a moment. “Just what I needed to feel better,” he grinned. It was that dopey smile that he only showed when he was tired, and Riza loved it. “Plus, I’ll need it. Tomorrow will be another long day.” Then, she felt him pause. “There’s… something coming up in a few days. I anticipate we’ll need to go after one of the people with the Ouroboros tattoo. Can you go to my mother’s that night?”

“Is this something I should be concerned about?”

Roy shook his head. “No. And I mean it,” he added earnestly. “I really don’t anticipate anything like that coming your way, however, it would give me peace of mind to know you’re all together.”

“You know I can handle myself,” she quipped lightly.

“I don’t doubt it for a second,” he replied, pressing a kiss to her forehead again. “But until I know exactly what I’m dealing with and how to handle it, it would let me breathe easier if I knew my pregnant wife and my daughter were under my mother’s protection. She has a whole labyrinth of tunnels underneath her bar. If the wrong people come knocking then you can hide under there and I’ll come when it’s safe.”

“The wrong people, huh?”

He nodded. “The Ouroboros gang,” he drawled. “Keep an eye out for anyone with that tattoo by the way. I have a picture of it in my office. I’ll show you it tomorrow.”

“Don’t worry, your mother already explained it to me.”

His eyelids drifted closed again and Riza smiled. She lifted a hand to caress his face lightly with her fingers. He flinched in fright but turned his head to press a kiss to her palm.

“Get some sleep,” she prompted.

“You said that before then distracted me,” he grumbled.

“I can take that kiss back,” she joked, moving out of his hold. This caused him to latch onto her torso even tighter.

“Please don’t,” he begged. “I’m sorry,” he gushed dramatically.

“Go to sleep, Roy. I love you.”

He hummed with a smile. “Love you too.”

[peiches]

“And now I’m looking at you...”

Pairing: Peter Parker x Stark!Reader

Summary: Getting ready to celebrate an anniversary things don’t really go as planned for you and Peter.

Warnings: Minor cussing? Angst?

Words: 5.9k+

A/N: Hi, hello, it’s me again. I know this took forever and I also know I said I was going to post this by the end of the year. But of course we know that didn’t happen, and I will apologize for that, but we’re here! New year and hopefully we can get this done lmao. Part 4 is here and I hope it is okay for low long it took to get this done. I hope you guys enjoy! And if you do give it a little heart! Now let’s start this off and get to reading, and I’ll do my walk of shame later. Thank ya’ll! 

Masterlist; Part 1: Part 2: Part 3

Part 4: Don’t Worry About Me

Peter’s head was still buzzing from what he saw in the lobby when he heard the elevator ding letting him know he was on the ‘Stark’ floor, as everyone jokingly called it. He heard chatter coming from the living room and when he stepped towards the entry way Tony was the first one to see him.

“Spiderling,” he said and everyone sitting around the couch looked over at him. He saw Pepper smile at him, but didn’t gaze at anyone else. Tony was about to say something when Pepper interrupted him and gestured towards the group around her.

“Peter, you should come in and sit,” he heard her say. He was about to set his stuff down in the hallway storage where he always did, but then he saw yours rain boots and school bag.

“Peter!” You laughed as he picked you up and placed you on the living room couch. He had walked you home from school since you both had an early release day. “I still have my raincoat and boots on! And I have to get ready for our date.” You pouted as you tried to push him off of you. Peter laughed as he kept peppering kisses all over your face.

“I never get to see you until I pick you up from school! And our date is in 6 hours.” He said as he looked down at you. He gave you one final kiss on the lips and sat down where your feet were resting. “Fine,” he said and started pulling your boots off, once they were off he kissed your ankle.

“Different sensation,” you giggled closing your eyes.

“Is it weird?” He asked as he kissed your knee and then your thigh.

You sighed and when you opened your eyes he was was hovering over you again. He smiled and started leaning down to kiss you when the elevator dinged.

“Y/N, Peter!” Morgan shrieked as she saw both of you on the couch.

“What are you doing?” Pepper walked up behind Morgan and saw you both sitting on the couch. Peter’s ears were tinged pink and you weren’t meeting her eyes.

“Nothing,” you both said quickly. Pepper hummed the corners of her mouth turning up. She then looked over at Morgan who was taking off her rain boots talking to Peter about something that happened at school, when she looked back up she saw yours near the couch.

“Bug,” she said and when you looked over to where she was pointing you huffed, standing from the couch and placing your boots next Morgan’s designated cubbie. Looking back at Peter you winked at him, while he looked at you smirking.

Pepper saw him staring at the boots, “Pete—“ she began, but when Peter looked up he finally saw everyone staring at him.

“I think, I think I’m going to go set up in the gym.” He muttered and gave a hesitant smile. Before Pepper could say anything else to him, he was gone.

When he got to the gym he changed and quickly set up at a punching bag. He didn’t wrap his hands, and he didn’t put gloves on but he curled his hand and hit, over, and over, and over again. His hands were screaming, and he didn’t know he was crying until he made the punching bag drop to the floor and looked down at his hands, they were red and bruised, covered in little droplets of water.

“What are you doing?” He heard from the entry way of the gym, he looked over and it was Tony standing at the entry way.

“Mr. Stark I—“ He started but didn’t know how to finish.

“Kid…”

“I can fix it,” Peter grabbed the chain and started lifting the bag but his hands started stinging.

Tony saw the boy wince and glanced down at his hands, “Actually, let’s go get you bandaged up, we can get someone to fix this later.” He pointed behind him and gestured to the hallway, Peter kept his head down passing Tony and walking towards the older mans lab.

Peter sat on a bench in the lab while he heard Tony rummage, grumbling something about not letting Morgan in his cabinets again. He heard a snap of fingers and then suddenly saw a chair come up in front of him.

He felt the cotton on his hand and when Peter’s eyes moved from his hand to Tony, he had glasses on, and not the usual over the top high tech glasses but regular horned rimmed ones that rested at the end of his nose. Peter huffed out a smile.

Tony glanced up, “What? Never seen me in glasses before?” Tony said as he started wrapping Peter’s hand carefully.

“Not these. No.” Peter winced, “When did you start wearing those?”

Tony hummed as he pinned the wrap in place, “After Y/N kept watching me squint when I looked at something close to me. She told Pepper, an eye exam and yelling at an optometrist later, here we are.” He said pointing at his face. “Don’t wear them much around Morgan though,” Tony huffed as took out a brace and slipped it on Peter’s hand.

Peter was going to ask why until he heard the older man give a dramatic sigh, “She cries and says I look old.” He chuckled and in return made Peter laugh too.

“Alright kid, all done,” Tony said as he patted Peter’s shoulder, he stood up and started cleaning up the supplies that he used.

He heard humming from Tony as he started placing the medical supplies in the cabinet, when Peter looked up he saw the inside of the cabinet door covered with little notes from you and Morgan, they were posted all over the inside that said, “Dad, I told you to be careful,” and another that said “I love you!” When his eyes landed on a picture of you and Morgan being carried by your dad in his Iron Man suit, his heart tugged at that, and felt the tears starting to well up again.

Tony heard Peter clear his throat and when he looked back to look at the boy, his head was in his hands and looked like he was having trouble taking deep breaths. Tony sighed and ran a hand through his hair, he sat next to Peter and wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“Is this about Y/N? Because if it is, I think I should be more upset, seeing as it is my kid.” He tried to laugh it off but Peter stayed the same, he finally set his hands down and Tony could see his eyes were red and puffy.

Peter didn’t look up from where he was staring ahead, “Mr. Stark I, I messed up.” He stuttered and that made Tony frown.

“Listen, I know my kid isn’t perfect, so I know there are always two sides of the story.” Tony squeezed Peter’s shoulder and sat in front of him again. “So what happened?”

Peter took in a big breath and then exhaled, “I think I over reacted and, and, wait. She didn’t tell you?” He finally looked up at Tony.

“No she didn’t.”

Peter looked at him shocked, “Why wouldn’t she tell you? She tells you everything.” He started sounding irritated.

“Not everything,” he waved it off, “so now I want to know.”

Peter stood up and started pacing, “Why the hell didn’t she tell you?” Peter mumbled and ran his hands through his hair. “See so she doesn’t even care about this, she’s going out with some new guy and she doesn’t even care. That’s why she didn’t tell me.” Peter spoke to himself getting more and more frustrated.

Tony looked at Peter, his eyebrows were furrowed, “What new guy? Tell you what?”

Peter was fuming until he finally snapped, “The blonde asshole I saw downstairs carrying Morgan out!”

“Are you talking about Harl—” Tony started but wasn’t able to finish, when he felt Peter storm past him.

Peter tried to talk himself out of what he was going to do, all the way down to get his Spiderman suit, and ignored Tony’s shouts from behind him. When he got his suit on and went out to the terrace he looked out onto the city.

“Karen?”

“Yes Peter?”

“Where is Y/N?”

&&.

Your phone buzzed with Wren’s answer over a picture you sent her of Harley and Morgan holding hands and walking down Central Park. “Make sure Morgan is leading him!” The message read making you smile.

“So when were you going to tell me that Wren was officially your girlfriend?” You asked Harley raising your eyebrows and setting your mug of hot chocolate near your lips.

You, Morgan, Harley, and Happy (who was sitting one table down) were at a small diner eating french fries, milkshakes, a hot chocolate for you, and a coffee for Happy. After a long day of attempting to keep up with both your little sister and your best friend, you were exhausted.

Morgan was trying to not laugh at the face Harley was making as he started stuttering, looking like a fish out of water.

“Why so nervous? I like Wren.” Morgan muffled in between bites of food.

Harley smiled at that and rubbed the back of his neck. “I know you do, but I would appreciate if we don’t talk about it.”

You squinted your eyes at him, “Why?”

“Well because, you know,” he said gesturing to you.

“Please don’t hesitate to tell me things just because of the current situation, plus I’ve known for about two weeks now.” You said smirking and throwing a balled up napkin at him.

Harley groaned at that and threw his head back. “I regret letting you two meet,” he grumbled as he drank his milkshake.

“It was inevitable, plus you tried to shove me behind you! Like what was that? You just made us look suspicious.” You raised your voice at him.

He raised his hands in defense, “First of all you went willingly, and second we did make it look suspicious.” He said and put a fry in his mouth.

You understood why Wren was suspicious of you at first, you and Harley were the first to admit that the bond between you both was a bit, weird to say the least. You had been attached to the hip since you first met and could barely be two days without each other. He was your other half, the big brother you never asked for but got anyway, and after he moved away it was like a part of you didn’t know what to do anymore. So when your dad brought up the idea of staying with Harley’s family for a weekend, both you and Harley could hardly contain your excitement. The first time you met Wren was on a Saturday on day after your had arrived. Harley’s phone kept buzzing but he quickly turned it on silent saying he didn’t need a distraction. He told his new friends that he had made, that “a close friend was over,” and they were hounding him to come out to lunch so they could meet who had their new friend holed up in his house. He finally got them to agree that they would meet up at five at a local skating rink where all the teenagers hung out. Apparently Wren didn’t receive that memo and she came over to surprise him and his friend with an early lunch, and when she knocked on the door, you opened it up. You saw her gaping at you, from inside the house came a whine from Harley asking who it was and to hurry up and get rid of them. You had smiled and apologized for Harley, and when you asked her for her name he came up behind you. “What’s taking so long?” He had asked grabbing the door and when he opened up a little more, you felt him freeze. “Wren,” he stuttered and gripped the door turning his knuckles white. “Harley,” you saw her tense and grip the brown bag in her hands. “Oh did you br—“ You tried to ask but Harley pulled you behind him. “Pattertwig,” he sighed and he grabbed the bag from Wren’s hands and shoved it into yours. He didn’t let you say much of anything else as he closed the door, you could hear yelling, the the creaking of wood, and when you opened the door to make sure things were okay, there was kissing. You smiled and walked towards the kitchen emptying the contents of the bag. When they came back inside hand in hand you properly introduced yourself and the rest of the night was spent making fun of Harley, a night well spent.

“Why didn’t you introduce me to Peter?” Harley asked, “Do I embarrass you or something?” He tried to laugh it off but sounded a bit hurt.

You looked at him, Morgan and him started throwing french fries at each other. Suddenly Morgan climbed out of the booth and walked over too Happy who was chatting away with a waitress.

You smiled as Morgan interrupted the conversation, she said something that made the waitress laugh and sat down in front of both her and Happy, Morgan looked over and gave you a thumbs up that you returned.

You looked back at Harley who was eating the rest of the french fries that were on the plate, “Do you remember how Wren acted? When she saw both of us together?”

Harley looked up at you and frowned a bit at that, “Yeah I do. She thought I was lying about liking her, and started crying. I felt horrible about it.”

You looked at the window, it was starting to snow, “I did too, but afterwards was fun.” You smiled remembering that day, while you heard Harley groan at the memory.

You looked back at him, he was staring at you. You huffed and rested your head in your hand. “I didn’t want that for him, I didn’t want for him to feel that way. I wanted to do it right, I knew you were going to come for Thanksgiving and I had a plan to introduce both of you and Wren and everything was going to be okay.” You blew a raspberry. “But here we are.”

“Pattertwi—“ he tried and when you turned your head towards him again he saw your cheeks were rosy and your eyes were rimmed with tears.

“He told me that he loved me Harley, and you should’ve seen the look on his face when I just sat there.” You rushed out and while Harley’s mouth stayed open at your words. There was a pause and then finally he spoke.

“Do you love him?”

Looking down at your mug of hot chocolate, you sighed, “I do, I really do. But hearing him say it? That was scary, people tell each other that they love each other all the time but they still leave.”

He looked at you in disbelief, “Are you really not going to tell him because you don’t want to get your feelings hurt?”

“Harley my mom said she loved me and she still walked out.”

There was a small pause and then you felt him grab your hand, “Babe you shouldn’t feel that way, and you shouldn’t let your mom control that part of you either.” His mouth curled into a smile.

He was the only one who knew about your mom and what had happened. You looked at his goofy smile and patted his hand. “You’re right, I know, and I want to tell him, but it took me by surprise and everything is wonky now. And now I feel like I’m all messed up.”

“We’re all a little wonky.” Morgan came up hand in hand with a grinning Happy.

Harley tipped his milkshake towards Morgan, “Cheers to that Goonie.” She covered her mouth and giggled at that.

“Ready to go?” Happy asked as he picked up Morgan and set her on the booth.

“Can we walk in the Park for a little bit and then go home?” Morgan asked Happy as you zipped up her jacket. Harley looked like he was about to argue when you spoke up.

“The Harry Potter movie marathon starts at 7 and the lights in the park are being turned on before that.” You told Harley and his shoulders sagged in relief.

Happy let out a big laugh, “That fine kiddo, we will just have to be back soon though, you know how your dad gets.” He muttered to both you and Morgan.

“Yes Happy,” the three of you said in unison.

Walking towards the park all four of you were talking and laughing, a crowd started forming around you guys to watch the lights in the park turn on for the first time this year. Morgan was trying to get to the very front. “Morgan you have to hold our hands.” You told her as she tried to slip away. You turned your head to see where Harley and Happy ended up as Morgan kept tugging your arm to get in the front. You saw him 5 people down from you talking to Happy about the lights you assumed. You relaxed, but when you looked back down to look at Morgan she was gone.

“Mor—Morgan!” You looked around the crowd. Looking back at Harley and Happy they caught your eye. They looked at your panic stricken face and walked towards you when the crowd cheered as the lights were turned on.

“Y/N?” Harley yelled above the crowd.

&&.

It took forever for Peter to find them, it seems like every time he had come close they were leaving or Peter was asked to help a stranger, and had to start tracking them all over again. He ended up on top of a small cafe looking down at the crowd forming to watch the lights light up for the first time. He had no idea where your group had ended up but maybe seeing the lights turn on for the first time would be a fun thing to watch. That is until he saw Morgan walking hand in hand with you, the little pink ball was bouncing right beside you, Happy and the blonde guy where right behind them laughing at something the blonde said. Peter felt his stomach drop and was shaking from anger or from the cold he didn’t know but he really didn’t like this guy. He kept looking for both you and Morgan as he lost sight of them. When he saw Morgan tugging at your arm trying to get to the front, he relaxed again smiling.

When the lights turned on the crowd cheered, but something was wrong as he felt his spider senses on edge. He heard you shout, “Morgan!” Over and over again, then a voice started shouting your name. He knew something was wrong and immediately swung down to the happy crowd. The cheering was even louder down there but Peter immediately noticed the crowd forming around him, they were shoving into him and with cameras flashing in his face, your voice fading in the crowd.

“Guys, please stop—“ he tried, but they were excited to see Spider-Man this up close.

“Morgan!” He tried to shout above the crowd asking him questions.

“Who’s Morgan?” Someone asked and that started another pile of questions.

He raised his hands and shot a web towards a street lamp to get out of there. He jumped and the crowd became even more rowdy than before still taking pictures of Spider-Man. He kept scanning the crowd from above a tree, growing more anxious with every passing moment until he spotted a little pink ball huddled near the Christmas tree, she was crying. He made sure the crowd was distracted when music started playing before he jump down and ran towards her.

“Morgan!” He whispered but the little girl immediately pushed him off shouting, “No!”

“Morgan,” he tried again, “it’s me Peter.”

She finally looked up at him, “Peter!” She lunged for him wrapping her tiny arms around his neck. He smiled and kissed the top of her head. “I lost sissy, I want my sissy.” She cried into his chest. He squeezed her tighter as he picked her up, scanning the crowd again to see where you were.

“We’ll find her Morgan I promise.” He told her and started walking, he didn’t exactly know where but he needed to start looking for you. He took a few steps away from the crowd when he heard a voice shout, “Goonie!”

Morgan peered up looking behind Peter, she immediately started squirming in Peter’s hold, he set her down and she immediately ran to the blonde guy who had his arms wide open for her. “Harley!” Peter’s heart squeezed at that. Looking at Morgan who was comfortable with this kid, how long had they known each other? Peter wasn't sure how long he stood there staring at them talking and hugging, but he snapped out of his little trance when he heard your voice and saw you running straight towards them.

“Oh my god, Morgan!” You practically cried landing on your knees and enveloping the smallest Stark in a tight hug. He saw Morgan’s face turn a little pink at that, he wanted to come up to you and tell you to let Morgan go a little but the blonde kid, Harley, beat him to it. He saw the two of were were talking, and he heard some murmuring coming from them. His ears perked up when he heard the name Spider-Man, he saw as Y/N’s eyebrows knitted together in confusion at first but when she stood up with Morgan on her hip and finally faced Peter, she let out a small smile, rested her head on top of Morgan’s, and mouth thank you. Peter smiled at her and lifted his hand up to wave when he saw Happy come bounding behind them too, phone pressed to his ear.

“Oh thank god, I though Tony was going to have to be involved.” He said and the trio let out a collective chuckle with a few sniffles mixed in there. He started talking to them and he’s sure they were talking about leaving because they turned to the direction of the crowd. Happy not having noticed Peter at first looked towards him for the first time and waved him over, “You need a ride Spiderboy?” Happy asked as Peter finally attempted to walk closer to the small group. Peter was going to say he was fine when his phone started ringing it was Alison and Ned, both he and Ned had agreed to come over to her house after 5:30 to work on a small science project that they were grouped together in. He muttered a quick profanity making sure the tiny ears in the group didn’t hear him.

“Hey Alison,” he quickly responded, “I’ll be there in about 30 minutes—“ he continued. What he didn’t see was Harley tense up at the name Peter said, he walked away out of ear shot. Saying a quick bye to Alison and Ned letting them know again he’ll be there with the supplies needed, when he hung up and walked towards the group again, he saw the boy, Harley, was tense with an arm wrapped around Y/N.

“Actually, Happy I think Spider-Man can go by himself, he got here by himself, he can leave by himself.” There was malice laced in Harley’s words.

“Harley.” Peter heard you, and saw you touch the guy’s shoulder.

That was the last straw for Peter. “Y/N, who is this guy?” He finally asked his face flaming red. “I saw him at the compound, I see him here with you!” His voiced increased with every word that he said. You opened your mouth to answer but Harley stepped in front of you.

“I’m her best friend.”

Peter took a step back trying to cool down, his hands were shaking. “No, I’m her best friend, I’m her boyfriend, I’m supposed to be here with her.” He calmly said looking towards Y/N and Morgan, with a frowning Happy next to them.

Happy tried to break the tension when Harley snapped. “No, last I heard you’re not her boyfriend anymore!”

Peter started shaking, fumbling with his mail when he shouted finally. “I didn’t choose that! It was her! She’s the one that didn’t care!” Peter snapped, everyone became silent around him. His ears were still ringing with anger, until he heard the sniffle that came out of you.

He felt his heart drop when he looked at you, tears falling down your face as Morgan wiped them away, “Y/N, bab—“ he tried.

He saw Harley head towards her as your tears kept him glued to the ground, not letting him move. The last thing he heard you say was, “Maybe it is.”

He saw you walk away with Morgan on your hip, Harley looked back at him with an angry face, what hurt the most was when Morgan looked back at him with a pout. What did he just do.

&&.

Tony and Pepper got off the elevator and when they stepped in the living room they saw the back of Morgan and Harley’s heads, the TV was on and they were watching the Harry Potter movie marathon. Tony and Pepper smiled at the sight but when they didn’t see the eldest Stark sitting on the couch they looked at each other confused.

“Hey guys, where’s—“ Tony started saying but when Morgan looked back at him he saw the worry on her face and stopped completely.

“Daddy.” She whispered to him and that made him step forward again, “I think Y/N needs you.”

That’s when Tony heard the sniffling and when he took a peek over the couch he saw you sitting on the floor curled up in your pajamas with a blanket wrapped around you.

“Oh, sweetheart.” You heard your dad say and when you looked up he was sitting next to you. You wrapped your arms around him. “I’m ready to wallow now,” you muffled into his chest.

He grabbed your face so you would look at him, “Can you tell us what happened with Peter now?” He asked as he wiped your tears with his shirt sleeve and moved your hair from your face tucking it behind your ears.

You took a deep breath, looked at both your parents and with a big huff you told them, “He told me he loved me and I didn’t say it back when I wanted too.” You choked out. Pepper took a seat on the couch next to Morgan and leaned down to stroke your hair. “You have no idea how much I wanted to say it. I was just scared dad!” You raised your voice looking at your dad.

Tony furrowed his eyebrows, not understanding. “You’ve said it before you say it all the time, bug. I’m not—”

You hid your face again in your dad’s chest, “I know I do! But I know you aren’t going anywhere, I know because you’ve been with me even though I’m a brat!”

There was a small pause, Tony was about to speak when you muffled out, “You said you loved mom but she still left.”

Tony’s heart stopped at your words, he stayed silent until you finally looked up at him. He had a sad look in his eyes but a small smile on his face.

“Dad—“ you started saying but he stopped you by grabbing both your hands.

He looked at Pepper and Morgan and sighed, “Ouch, I know I’m not a role model when it comes to these sort of things, but you shouldn’t be afraid to tell someone you love them because it didn’t work out for me the first time,” he said as he grabbed your face again. “Plus I think it worked out pretty good this time.” He added chuckling.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I love all four of you,” you laughed as Morgan pounced on you and Pepper sat on the floor joining in on the hug, Harley followed suit and joined the small ball on the floor.

You laughed as you were being squeezed by the ball that was on the floor. Slowly everyone disentangled themselves. Tony and Pepper looked at each other and when they both nodded, Pepper stood. She looked at Harley and he got the message too.

“I’m hungry.” Harley whined, and everyone laughed at that.

Pepper ruffled his hair, and helped him get up from the couch, “Let’s go then Reepicheep.” She said walking towards the kitchen. Harley groaned stuffing his hands in the pockets of his pajamas.

“I can’t believe you told her that damn name.” He grumbled as Morgan jumped on his back, and both followed after Pepper.

You snickered and yelled after him, “Serves you right, you named me after a squirrel!”

“You named me after a rat!” He shouted back. You heard Pepper let out a big laugh, and you felt your dad’s chest rumble with a small chuckle.

There was cabinets opening, stove tops turning on, and chatter from the kitchen. But you and Tony stayed on the floor, he was rubbing your back as you clung onto him.

“I’m sorry I made you worry about me dad.”

Tony hummed and started playing with your hair, “I think that’s a part of the dad job.”

You smiled at that looking up at him, “I know, but I promised a long time ago I wouldn’t let you worry about me.”

He looked at you with ruffled eyebrows, “What do you— oh.” He wrapped his arm around you and squeezed you into a hug, he smiled back at you. “You remember what I told you?”

“Are you crying?” Your dad’s voice came behind you.

You were sitting on the window nook, that was in your room at the Malibu house. You were looking out the window, the water crashed into the rocks below. His voice made you jump and you looked back at him. He was standing at the door with his hands in his pockets.

“Huh? I’m not crying.” You said, your voice barely above a whisper.

You heard light footsteps coming in your room then felt your dad sit beside you.

Tony looked at his daughter, she tucked herself away, her arms were wrapped around her knees. She hadn’t spoken to him all day, he was tired mentally and physically but he had to be here for her, she needed him right now. Tony sighed tugged on a strand of his kid’s hair, “No one’s going to get mad at you if you cry because you’re sad or hurt, you know?”

“Daddy—“ She started saying not looking up. He heard her voice tremble, but before he could speak she cleared her throat and started again.

“I didn’t want to make you sad, or make you worry about me. That’s why even though mommy’s gone. I promise now daddy, that I’m not going to make you sad or worry about me anymore. I’m not going to cry as much as before.” She said and Tony just looked at his daughter in awe. She was worried about him, about how he felt when he saw her this way. Tony’s heart melted at that, his eyes welling up with tears. He grabbed her and hugged her close to his chest.

“Baby, listen carefully. You don’t have to feel embarrassed or ashamed about crying in times of sadness, or asking for help when times are hard. I know mommy leaving is sad, but you don’t have to worry about me.” He said into her ear.

Tony felt his daughter’s grip tighten on his shirt and nuzzle her head in his chest.

“I don’t want you to be sad or lonely.” She whispered to him, looking up at him with tears in her eyes.

Tony smiled down at you and rubbed your back, “I’ll be okay, bug. I’m really strong.” He said to her chuckling at the small pout she wore.

You frowned at that,“I’m not strong like you are.”

“Oh, but you are. Look at this you’re crushing me.” Tony gasped and started falling onto the ground.

You laughed at your dad as you looked down at him laying on the ground from the window nook. You two ended up falling asleep like that, you laying down on bench of your nook with Tony on the floor, holding hands. And maybe in that moment he needed her more than she needed him.

You looked up at your dad and held him tighter, “I remember, sort of.”

Tony hummed and started flipping the channels on the TV, “so Peter told you he loved you?”

You groaned letting go of him and put your face in your hands as he patted your back. Sweeping your hair back from your face and turned your head to look back at your dad who had a small smile on his face.

“He did tell me,” you sighed.

“And you didn't say anything?”

You shook your head, “No.”

“Well that must have been rough on him.”

“He looked so hurt. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to hurt him.”

“I know.”

“I just got scared and I sat there.”

“I understand. You know, I'm still learning this stuff too and since I'm still learning, I think I haven't thought enough about what I'm supposed to be teaching you.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, “What are you talking about?”

Tony ran a hand over his face, “I’m talking about my own personal lack of past commitment skills. I mean, look, I love that you have my ears and my coffee addiction and my taste in music and movies, but when it comes to love and relationships, I don't necessarily want you to be like me. I would hate to think that I raised a kid who couldn't say I love you.”

“Dad.”

“I’m not even talking specifically about Peter. I mean just generally in life.”

You threw your head back and it hit the couch. Tony let out a chuckle and hugged you close to him again.

“My point is that it's scary to be in love, that much I know, but it's also wonderful and special and if you can't say it or fully express it then you're never gonna be able to experience it and I want you to experience everything that's great because you're so great. Are you hearing me?” Tony said resting his head on top of your head.

“Yeah, I'm hearing you.” You whispered.

Tony let go of you grabbing your face and brushing the hair out of your eyes again, “I’m not saying you say ‘I love you’ at the drop of a hat. It has to be right and real and it has to take a lot of thought. But someday with someone it will be right. I want you to be ready for that moment when it happens.”

You were about to speak again when Morgan, Pepper, and Harley came in with plates of food and set them down on the coffee table. Everyone started settling down on the rug and passing food to one another. Morgan catching the last bit of your conversation asked innocently.

“What moment are you getting ready for? When will it happen?”

You smiled and stole some food from her plate, Morgan protested, then you finally said, “I’m working on the right moment, Goonie. I don’t know when it’ll happen, however I do know what dress I'll be wearing.”

“Well, I wanna be there when it happens.” Morgan said excitedly.

Harley nodded, “If Goonie’s invited, so am I.”

Tagged: @shirleyhush​