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#Oh god what did I even write
gingermintpepper · 4 days
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As usual I read your tags always and so you said Apollo did not ask for resurrection of Asclepius and Hyacinthus so i just wanted to share this. About Asclepius death I read it on theoi.com, that earlier authors don't make him resurrect as a god but that's a later development mentioned only by Roman authors like Cicero, Hyginus and Ovid. But still Apollo has a role in Ovid's version
Ovid, Fasti 6. 735 ff (trans.Boyle) (Roman poetry C1st B.C. to C1st A.D.) : Clymenus [Haides] and Clotho resent the threads of life respun and death's royal rights diminished. Jove [Zeus] feared the precedent and aimed his thunderbolt at the man who employed excessive art. Phoebus [Apollon], you whined. He is a god; smile at your father, who, for your sake, undoes his prohibitions [i.e. when he obtains immortality for Asklepios].
So here it is actually because of Apollo the decision was taken to resurrect him as god. And with Hyacinthus, I don't think I've read about Artemis playing the primary role. I know in Sparta there was a picture of Artemis, Athena and Aphrodite carrying Hyacinthus and his sister to heaven.
This is not on theoi.com but I saw on Tumblr it's from Dionysiaca by Nonnus
Second, my lord Oiagros wove a winding lay, as the father of Orpheus who has the Muse his boon companion. Only a couple of verses he sang, a ditty of Phoibos, clearspoken in few words after some Amyclaian style: Apollo brought to life again his longhaired Hyacinthos: Staphylos will be made to live for aye by Dionysos.
So since he is singing inspired by amyclean stories it probably means in that place it was believed Apollo was the one to bring back his lover to life.
Apollo as god of order was very important so i think it shows how special these people (and admetus too) were to him that he decided to go against the order for them 🥺
ANON!! Shakes you like a bottle of ramune!! BELOVED ANON!!!!! I'm littering your face with kisses, I'm anointing you with olive oil and honey - you absolutely made my night with this because, not only did I get the pure serotonin shot of having someone interact with my tags (yippee, wahoo!!) I also got to have that wonderful feeling of "oh wow, have I misunderstood something that was integral to my understanding of this myth/figure this whole time or is this a case of interpretational differences?" which is imo vital for my aims and interests as someone who enjoys mythological content and literature.
I'll preface my response with this: Hyacinthus is by far the hardest of these to get accounts for because his revival itself, as you very astutely point out, is generally accounted for in painting/ritual format which muddies the waters on who interceded for what. I wasn't actually familiar with that passage from the Argonautica - and certainly didn't remember it so thank you very much for bringing it to my attention!
That said, what I've come to understand, both about Hyacinthus and about Asclepius is that in the accounts of their deaths, Apollo's position is startlingly clear.
For Hyacinthus, it is established time and again that Apollo would have sacrificed everything for him - his status, his power, his very own immortality and divinity. Ovid writes that Apollo would have installed him as a god if only he had the time:
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(Ovid. Metamorphoses. Book X. trans. Johnston)
Many other writers too speak of how Apollo abandoned his lyre and his seat at Delphi to spend his days with Hyacinthus, but they also all agree that when it came to his death - he was powerless. Ovid gives that graphic account of Apollo's desperation as he tries all his healing arts to save him to no avail:
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(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book X. Apollo me boy, methinks him dead. trans Johnston)
Bion, in one of his fragments, writes that Apollo was "dumb" upon seeing Hyacinthus' agony:
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(Bion, The Bucolic Poets. Fragment XI. trans Edmonds)
Even Nonnus in the Dionysiaca speaks constantly of Apollo's helplessness in the face of Hyacinthus' fate where he writes that the god still shivers if a westward wind blows upon an iris:
and when Zephyros breathed through the flowery garden, Apollo turned a quick eye upon his young darling, his yearning never satisfied; if he saw the plant beaten by the breezes, he remembered the quoit, and trembled for fear the wind, so jealous once about the boy, might hate him even in a leaf...
(Nonnus, Dionysiaca, Book 3. trans Rouse)
And the point here is just that - Apollo, at least as far as I've read, cannot avert someone's death. He simply can't. Once they're already dead - once Fate has cut their string - all Apollo's power is gone and he can do nothing no matter how much he wants to. And this is, as far as I know, supported with the accounts of Asclepius as well!
Since you specifically brought up Ovid's account, I'll also stick only to Ovid's account but in Metamorphoses when we get Ovid's version of Coronis' demise, he writes that Apollo intensely and immediately regrets slaughtering Coronis. He regrets it so intensely that he, like he does with Hyacinthus, does his best to resuscitate her:
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(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo's regret)
And like Hyacinthus, when it becomes clear that what has happened cannot be undone, Apollo wails:
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(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo wept.)
Unlike his mother, Asclepius in her womb had not yet died and so, with the last of Apollo's strength, he does manage, at least, to save him.
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(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo puts the 'tearing out' in Asclepius.)
But it goes further than even that because Ocyrhoe, Chiron's daughter, a prophetess who unduly gained the ability to directly proclaim the secrets of the Fates, upon seeing the baby Asclepius, immediately prophesies his glory, his inevitable death and then his fated ascension:
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(Ovid. Metamorphoses, Book Two. Ocyrhoe's prophecy. trans Johnston)
Before she too succumbs to her hubris and is transformed by the Fates into a horse so she can no longer speak secrets that aren't hers to share.
These things ultimately are important because it establishes two very important things: 1) Apollo can't do anything in the face of the ultimate Fate of mortals, which is, of course, death and 2) even when Apollo is Actively Devastated, regretful, yearning, mournful, guilty or some unholy combination of all of the above, when someone is dead, he accepts that they are gone. Even if he is devastated by it, even if he'll cry all the rest of his days about it - if they're dead? Apollo lets them go. In Fasti, when Zeus brings Asclepius back, he does not say Apollo asked him to - Zeus, or well, in this case Jove, brings Asclepius back because he wants Apollo to stop being mad at him.
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(Ovid, Fasti VI. Apollo please come home your father misses you. trans. A.S Kline)
Even Boyle's translation which you used above in your findings hints that Zeus made Asclepius a god because he wanted Apollo to stop grieving. (i.e 'smile at your father', 'for your sake [he] undoes his prohibitions')
And like, Apollo was deeply upset by Asclepius' death - apart from killing the Cyclops in anger, in book 4 of the Argonautica, Apollonius writes that the Celts believe the stream of Eridanus to be the tears Apollo shed over the death of Asclepius when he left for Hyperborea after being chastised by Zeus for killing his Cyclops:
But the Celts have attached this story to them, that these are the tears of Leto's son, Apollo, that are borne along by the eddies, the countless tears that he shed aforetime when he came to the sacred race of the Hyperboreans and left shining heaven at the chiding of his father, being in wrath concerning his son whom divine Coronis bare in bright Lacereia at the mouth of Amyrus.
It all paints a very clear picture to me. Apollo did not ask for either of them to be brought back. Though bringing them back certainly pleased and delighted him, they are actions of other gods who are moved by Apollo's grief and mourning and seek to mollify him. Him not asking doesn't mean he didn't want them back which I think is a very important distinction by the by, but it simply means that Apollo knows the natural order of things and, even if it hurts, he isn't going to press his luck about it.
Which, of course, brings us to Admetus. And I'm really not going to overcomplicate this, Admetus is different because, very vitally, Admetus is not dead. Apollo can't do a thing once Fate has been carried out and Death has claimed a mortal but you know what he absolutely can do? Bargain like hell with the Fates before that point of inevitability. And that's what he does, ultimately for Admetus and Alcestis. He sought to prolong Admetus' life, not revive him from death or absolve him from death altogether and even after getting the Fates drunk, he's still only able to organise a sacrifice - a life for a life - something completely contingent on whether some other mortal would be willing to die in Admetus' place and not at all controllable by Apollo's own power.
All of these things, I think come back to that point you made - that Apollo's place as a god of order is very important and therefore these people are very special to him if it means he's willing to go against that order but, I also wish to challenge that opinion if you'd let me. Apollo's place as a god of order is very important and therefore, I would argue, that it is even more important that it is shown that he does not break the divine order, especially for the people that mean the most to him. The original context of my comments which started this conversation were on this lovely, lovely post by @hyacinthusmemorial which contemplated upon Asclepius from the perspective of an Emergency Medical personnel and included, in their tags, the very poignant lines "there's something about Apollo letting go when Asclepius couldn't that eats my heart away" and "you do what you can, you do your best, but you don't ever reach too far" and I think that's perfectly embodied with the Apollo-Asclepius dichotomy. Apollo grieves. He wails, he cries, he does his best each and every time to save that which is precious to him but he does not curse their nature, he does not resent that they are human and ultimately, he accepts that that which is mortal must inevitably die. There is nothing that so saliently proves that those who uphold rules are also their most staunch followers - if Apollo wants to delight in his place as Fate's mouthpiece, he cannot undo Fate. And, if even the god of healing and order himself cannot undo death, what right does Asclepius, mortal as he is, talented as he is, have to disrespect it?
The beauty of these stories isn't that Apollo loved them enough to bring them back. The beauty is that Apollo loved them enough to let them go.
#this is such a long ass post oh my god#ginger answers asks#This totally got away from me but I AM PASSIONATE ABOUT THIS AAAA#Anon beloved anon I hope you don't take this as me shutting you down or anything because that really isn't what I'm trying to do#I'm definitely going to dig more into the exactness of 'who petitioned for Hyacinthus to be revived actually?"#I always stuck to the belief that it was Artemis because of the depictions of his revival + his procession is usually devoid of Apollo#I know some renaissance paintings have him and Apollo reuniting but that's usually In The Heavens y'know#I genuinely couldn't think of any accounts that have Apollo Asking for anyone to be revived#Apollo does intercede sometimes but that's usually for immortals like Prometheus#Or even when he's left to preside over Zagreus' revival and repair in orphic tradition#Concerning Asclepius there's like a ton to talk about tbh#There's the fact that in some writings (in quite a lot actually) the reason Asclepius was killed wasn't necessarily that he brought someone#back - it was that he accepted money for it#Pindar wrote about it and Plato talks about how if Asclepius really did accept gold for a miracle then he was never a son of Apollo#It's a whole thing really#I think it's very important that it's Asclepius in his mortal folly that tests the boundaries of life and death tbh#The romanticisation of going to any length to bring back a loved one is nice and all#But sometimes the kindest and most lovely thing you can do for someone is to accept it#Just accept that they're gone - accept that there was nothing that could be done and even if the grief is heavy - keep living#Maybe we won't all get our lost loves back#But there are definitely always more people worth loving if you just live long enough to find them#apollo#asclepius#zeus#admetus#greek mythology#ovid#oh my god so much ovid#hyacinthus#coronis
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puhpandas · 4 months
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I love ggy so much how did they accidentally make the most intriguing hypothetical gay romance ever
#also the book is just so fucking good#and tony becker is literally the best fnaf book protaganist ever once you understand his character#and how crazy the book writes him#like oh my god hes so tunnel visioned doomed by the narritave#any scenario where tony survives the attack is the best idea ever like fr#its just so fun and awesome to make stuff up with that very loose premise#like u can do anything#and the characters are likeable too because they have FLAWS#tony isnt a bad person hes just in a bad place and is an asshole without realizing#and also twelve#like how am i not supposed to become obsessed with beckory when tony spent the whole book#accidentally obsessing over gregorys evil side and then being so tunnel visioned by his own emotional baggage that it kills him#exactly how his father warned him#and his father is the reason hes even so deep into solving mysteries like#and u can put that onto gregory if tony ever survived the attack#like he wouldnt want to believe it the same way he didndt want to believe his dad did it and repeat history#by delving deep into ggy#like damn every relationship ever with gregory is so fucking interesting#ggy never stop being awesome#pandas.txt#obviously beckory isnt the only reason i like ggy but damn its a big reason#tony and Gregory are both so flawed and have so much going on in their head theyd be fucking crazy together#also expanding on the tony stuff i said earlier gregorys side has so much potential too like#even if tony died if gregory ever remembered hed mourn tony and have to deal with that#even if they werent even that close at the time and Gregory doesnt even like. actually have any memories of being friends with him#and if tony survived its like gregorys remembering this faceless nameless boy as the only connection to his past#like what if they both searched for eachother after surviving what then
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kinos-fortress-2 · 10 months
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what does one unfinished fic from like 2022 of a very rareshipp does a to a mf
and also a trashy playlist that got me in my own feelings...
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buttercupshands · 6 months
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Chapter 419 Analysis or "How to completely break Tenko Shimura" a manipulative guide from All For One (part 1)
This is mainly a character analysis of Shigaraki Tomura or Shimura Tenko, any other character present is there to help.
Chapter 419 was hard to comprehend even with just summaries right on April 4th. Some things need at least fan translation to fully make sense. Or just hurt more in that matter.
Warning of spoilers to the whole manga to the point of chapter 419! All of the warnings from the respective Tomura chapters are applicable.
So like... mentions of death, killing other people, manipulation, emotional abuse and many more!
This is Part 1 - See Part 2 for something less depressing
This is going to be long! So let's start, shall we?
First of all we'll need to take into understanding ALL the chapters that we'll need to remember/reread just make this chapter worse (skip if already familiar with them):
Chapter 222 - Tomura Shigaraki: Distortion
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Chapter 234 - Destruction Sense
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Chapter 235 - Tenko Shimura: Origins
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Chapter 236 - Tenko Shimura Origins, Part 2
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Chapter 237 - Tomura Shigaraki: Origins
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This is your "Tenko and Tomura understanding" starter pack, basically. Without them it's harder to even start unpacking what just happened with Tomura's perspective in mind
Well then.
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The chapter starts and we are immediately greeted by AFO semi-agreeing without wanting to, that Tomura was strong enough before Izuku started trying "saving" him in his own way and even succeeded making Tenko's will all the more fragile than it was when he returned using his hate to his advantage.
Even after Izuku holding Tenko's hands for the whole chapter he was still stubborn enough to continue even without that hate in his heart
And the thing that initial summaries missed was the fact that Tomura actually reacted to AFO reapperance.
Still not understanding why AFO was even saying that.
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Tenko was literally taught by AFO to follow "what he wants" in ch 237 with Tenko making his first decision to kill someone himself. And never actually hiding that Tomura just needed to never forget that hatred and those bad emotions that Tomura never really understood. And it took Izuku seconds to decipher them.
With AFO reassuring Tomura that he has no need in following morals of society and just should follow whatever he wants - his want to destroy everything that hurts him. And only AFO would accept and help him. He was constantly reminded of that.
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Even if Tenko was feeling sick from killing at first, even if hands that he wore were still making him sick 15 years later without him understanding anything. Decisions made while person is emotional are usually the ones that the person might regret the most and Tomura lived with those unstable emotions for years. Knowing that they hurt him and make him feel sick.
But Sensei said that it's okay to follow those emotions. That's it's actually great that he does it.
Everything was for his sake, everything was for Tomura Shigaraki and Tomura Shigaraki only. He was his Sensei's successor and no one should argue with it. He's the only one to be next ruler of the underground and the next king. And Tomura gladly accepted that as truth.
Since it was easier than facing his guilt.
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Because AFO just needed Tomura to have enough willpower to get OFA when the plan is ready. To make Gigantomachia to follow him while Garaki was watching knowing full well how the plan is going. Both knowing full well that Tomura is still holding himself back.
In this chapter however we finally see how all of the things AFO told and taught Tenko were just to make him so sure that HE was in control and allowed to do whatever he wants to completely break his worldview in the end "after he gets OFA" which is an unreachable goal now since OFA is gone for good.
By just saying that Tenko never had any choice to begin with.
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Tomura already knew that AFO manipulated him and he was just a pawn, needed only to get OFA and piss off All-Might he accepted and embraced it as something unimportant. It was his choice and he was free to do it and not feel bad about it. Since he's born to destroy.
Until suddenly it wasn't just his life after Decay that was manipulated.
But his whole life from birth. Just because AFO didn't get his hands on Hana sooner and she was happy while AFO needed someone hurt and broken. And Shimura's household wasn't as bad as he needed it to be at first with Kotaro loving his children, wife, in-laws and even his mother.
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And AFO destroyed it by creating so much conflict and even going out of his way to make sure Tenko's father knew that he was playing heroes with some kids. And even saved them by putting his own quirkless life in danger.
In some sense narrator-Tomura's words at the end of ch 236 still might hold true. AFO didn't just create his hate out of nowhere, to make it feel like even if Tenko remembers everything it's still he's doing not a villain appearing, not just some accident that it actually was.
Although AFO doesn't say anything about people who didn't help Tenko even though he he knew that it happened so he most probably was watching it happen until Tenko lost all hope entirely to finaly make him dependent on his help.
And he succeeded for the most part.
Tomura was making an assumption after he remembered everything that he "must've been yearning for that" and from that point onwards explains everything that happened as "I wanted it - I did it" and was clinging to it like a lifeline to explain everything.
He accepted that if Re-Destro is talking about his Decay quirk affecting him he exists only to destroy.
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And now it seems he found a false motivation for himself that AFO created by cruely manipulating everything from his quirk to his family. Making him believe he had a hand in it. Breaking one of "safe" truths that Tomura never doubted. They only made his decisions feel right.
Which makes that a hopeless loop of broken memories being staged just to let Tenko become Tomura who hates and destroys everything believing that it's his choice. Only choice at that.
And if destroying is him only choice because of his quirk... then what can a quirkless person do while having so many people dead from his own hands? Hands that were literally cursed to have destruction quirk in them not because he was born to do it. But because his own Sensei wanted that.
And he's "unwavering heart" is now nothing but an illusion that was destroyed by both Izuku and AFO together.
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There's no "Can I be a Hero?", because can he even be a Villain if most of the choices that were from Decay and the hatred in his heart weren't actually his own?
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fumifooms · 4 months
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I think you made me start shipping Marchil
Your posts got me thinking about their dynamic then I wrote a fic that was supposed to be platonic but midway through I realized it could actually be interpreted as romantic too and now I'm just sad about how little time they'll have together
First of all, you have a lovely icon, second, I’m so honored… I finally read Not a bad way to go and it was soo so good like. My god!!! Pre-canon is underused and you did so many interesting things with it.
It sounded like a cruel joke, that the one who needed her concern the most was also the one least interested in it.
^^^ go read it go read it
Chilchuck was drunk enough that he needed to hold onto the walls not to fall, but apparently still sober enough to remember emotional vulnerability was his worst enemy, as he made sure to avert her eyes and said: “Namari made me come talk to you ” to make it clear he wasn't being nice voluntarily.
Yeah.
“Of course I'm scared of dying.” He scoffed. Did she really think so little of him? “But if I could choose, I would want to die doing something I love, like drinking. Or maybe fucking,”
Maybe you wish you didn’t know but my new favorite HC because of this is that Chil dies yes prematurely not of liver failure though but during coitus. Especially if marchil, the thought of him busting a nut and his heart giving out makes me laugh so hard. My god. Lmao. Oh god. Lmfao. Worst day of her life
Marcille knew Chilchuck wasn't a kid, but she often struggled to take him seriously as an adult because he was just so adorable and small. In this moment, however, she saw them exactly for what they were, even if it was just a glimpse. A sheltered, naive little girl trying to tell a tired, much more experienced man how to live the rest of his life.
Standing ovation
She tried to find an explanation to give him, but she couldn't even find one for herself. Why would she miss him? He was just Chilchuck, her coworker, Chilchuck who was cold, aloof, sometimes crass, evasive, and even outright mean. He who was level headed, reliable, trustworthy, perceptive and clever. He who had the least time left, even in a best case scenario. “I guess that despite your best efforts, there's still a lot to like about you.”
This fic goes so hard, standing ovation pt 2
“I just think it's better if we don't get too close. Don't you agree?” “I… maybe” she said, uncertain as he didn't know how to feel about that. Caring about people would only hurt her in the wrong run, she knew that, but unfortunately she couldn't help it.
I looove how they can be read to be similar on this aspect. My hand clenching around my phone as I rear up to rant about Marcille and the way she does keep people at an arm’s length subconsciously again my god my goood. Obsessed with this obsessed with this, underused for marchil. Terrified of loss through death vs rejection duo I love youuu
Brilliant ending I’m in shambles. I’m not gonna spoil it
You get marchil so much you truly do. The way they mesh, the way their views on mortality clash and both soothe & bruise… He doesn’t have much time left even in best case scenario (which Mr I won’t eat well I’ll drink and smoke a lot I’ll stress all day every day is determined to not make happen) which makes it all the more meaningful for Marcille’s arc when she learns from him to finally enjoy the present moments… It’ll only be a fraction of her life, but to him he’s giving her the rest of his life. What are some decades of love worth? Worth it, surely, if nothing else
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what-even-is-sleep · 4 months
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thinking about Bodkin again bc I mean,,, ALL THE SYMBOLISM OHHHHHGH. i NEED some tumblr film analysis hobbyists to watch this show and tell me all the themes n such
#yes I’m making all these posts in a row#it’s bc I’m obsessed atm#mypost#Bodkin#bodkin netflix#PLEASSEEEEE#WHY DID THE PAPER MACHE HEAD LOOK LIKE GILBERT#CAN WE HAVE AN IN-DEPTH CONVERSATION ABOUT EVERYTHING ABOUT GILBERT BEING FORCED TO SWALLOW/CHOKE ON HIS WORDS (recorder) BUT THAT SOUND—HIS#STORY (HIS pov. however ‘abstract’ and detatched from consequence it may have been) BEING WHAT CATCHES EMMY AND DOVEs ATTENTION TO SAVE HIM#. LIKE#OUGHHHHHWJEHQIHSJSBWJXNAJSNNQJZNWHXJWHXJEBXNDUSBJS#AND THE WOLF IMAGERY PLS SOMEONE TELL ME ABOUT THAT#IS THERE MORE THAN THE SURFACE? what do I not understand? as im writing this out am thinking: ok its cause dove is a lone wolf#WAITTTT WAIT OMFG AND when she remembers that her mom told her to howl when she was lost… bc wolves actually have family and I’m p sure the#lone wolf thing is a myth… after she realizes that she’s not alone and she can choose to interact#GOD GRAHHHHH IM GOING CRAZY OVER THIS SHOW#other things I’m thinking abt (will maybe make a post abt?)#OUGH YEAH OK dove symbolism: wolf/lone wolf. sunglasses/shielding herself (OUGH AND SHE PICKS UP THAT XTRA LAYER OF DEFENCE WHEN SHE COMES#BACK TO HOMELAND/familiar space… bc she’s vulnerable to her past here…. hrahhh#. also LMFAO when she calls the sheriff a piggy#hrmmmmm aughhh I want to dissect Gilbert and Seamus’s friendship oughhh#ok wait even more on Dove: I want to dig into when she calls Emmy Emmy vs Sizargd (will have to look up the spelling whoops) —was it always#blatant manipulation? how much of it is a reflection of what she is? hrmmmm there’s so much there I think#another Q: why did Emmy call the tech guy Shitpants again at the end? ik there were the stakes I just wanna dig into her character more. why#would she say the shitpants thing instead of manipulating him in other ways? (not saying her was was unreasonable at all lol-j wanna dig#into her character.#OH prob something abt the whole ‘her needing to release her anger’ thing? idk ahh I want to analyze her more
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post apocalypse au where the plot of stranger things doesn't happen but vecna still tears the world open and brings the upside down right side up. and the scattered people who managed to survive the initial earthquakes and power outages and complete breakdown of society have to contend not only with creatures from the upside down trying to eat them, but also with what the bleeding of an alternate dimension into their reality is doing to their bodies
people with prolonged exposure to larger tears seem to be slowly changed into something else, like some radioactivity from the dimension is mutating them. people grow claws, or leathery wings, or their face peels open, or they turn into unrecognisable piles of eldritch goo. there's vampires, were-demogorgons, flayed, weird ghosts, and the number of super powered people like el was in the show skyrockets
other people who manage avoid this fate shun those that fell to it. and to an extent it's reasonable, some people who get changed in this way completely lose their humanity, like the flayed, and while others retain it it probably doesn't seem that way when a vampire-like person needs human blood to survive. but a lot of people are just as terrified of the changes happening to them as other people are, and while they may not be harmless, they'd much rather use their new biological advantages to keep people safe
despite this, people that have been 'corroded' by the upside down are ostracised, feared, sometimes outright hunted by regular humans. so sometimes, they band together. form their own little apocalypse groups
eddie is in one of those groups. he wouldn't say he's the leader, bc they don't really have a hierarchical structure and eddie likes to think he's managed to maintain his anarchic ideals even in the face of the apocalypse. but he is the oldest, and the most scary looking (if not the most actually dangerous), so the combination of everyone being younger and his ability to scare off corroded-hunters that come looking for them means everyone else kind of follows his lead
so no one really questions when he comes back to camp one day holding two passed out humans. a mole-dotted man and a freckled woman, probably about eddie's age, who were injured and had crawled into a ruin building to die. and like. what was eddie supposed to do, leave them there??? no, gareth, it has nothing to do with how pretty the guy is. no, eddie doesn't know how they'll react when they wake up in the middle of a corroded camp, they'll cross that bridge when they get there. el says she senses that they're good people, so clearly everything will be fine actually!!!!!
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widevibratobitch · 1 year
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when i say i am obsessed with him
#'indescribable insolence' <3333#dumas writing aramis in '20 years after':#i am going to create a character that is so egdy sarcastic provocative and irritating to everyone around him#and im gonna make stirring shit being an asshole and gruesome murder his favourite hobbies#and he did just as he said. bless him.#most character ever#and what makes him even better is the contrast between 20YA!aramis and t3M!aramis. its hilarious.#my man really went feral. midlife crisis some call it. i call it character development of all time. i call it serving cunt.#aramis as a musketeer a soldier a man in a profession where you're literally paid for killing people:#sweetness and mildness personified writes poetry and theology essays in his free time never gambles dreams about dedicating his life to god#aramis as a priest: whooo boy i hope i get to fUCKING KILL A PERSON TODAY >:D#anyway. i love him a normal amount or something.#the three musketeers#alexandre dumas#anyway. i reread this scene and the charenton battle today because it's definitely in my top 3 aramis moments#also the english translation on the gutenberg page omits two lines of dialogue that i remembered from my polish translation#and it goes something like#de Chatillon says 'i think you're looking for a fight sir' to which Aramis basically responds with 'oh nooo you *think*? Imao'. iconic.#(and its even funnier cause that makes athos immediately go 'aramis stfu plz' and aramis just goes 'no <3' im obsessed with them)#vingt ans apres#do i have a#twenty years after#tag?? not sure tbh i think i dont but tagging just in case ig
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shoezuki · 7 months
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the essay i got due tomorrow n barely done is like. its good i like it im excited to write it and im so upset that i have no time and am sick like.
its in my fairy tales n folklore class n im writing on the subject of taboo topics in perrault's 'donkeyskin' and specifically the symbolism/metaphors of the donkey hide she wears n how it symbolizes her trauma haunting her long after she escapes her fathers attempts to marry her n like. i like the story a lot n how its kinda fucked up but perrault really watered down the father-daughter incest topic n tried to make it more 'safe' and less taboo. but he fucking failed and i wanna argue bout it so bad. but my head hurt
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cripplepunkfag · 5 days
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god i wish i could stop fuckin thinking this i feel like such a dick i KNOW people with more obvious and more serious disabilities dont "have it better" but i cant stop thinking about it i just wish i could collapse dramatically and get rushed somewhere and magically diagnosed i feel like such a fuckin drama queen because i feel awful all the time but its just like dizziness and pain do i even have the right to claim im disabled? its not like im diagnosed. its not like i know whats wrong. its not like its serious. maybe i am just fuckin faking it.
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boxwinebaddie · 3 months
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UNCLE NINA WRITES WEIRD JK STAN LETTERS!
hello benevolent angel people!
( because you're wonderful but bc you're doing gods work by supporting my dead fanfic from hell. c:’ )
so this is a lil...experimental? but bc i've been dabbling on that one ask large lore ask that set before kyle knows raven of crimson dawn is his stan, i've gotten very attached to writing the silly jersey letters to dead stan in his journal again. ( again, nina lore is that it's what a friend had me do when my first cat passed away.
i still write to her. <3 )
but this is just something i wrote to get back into the habit of writing again. i put it on docs and i used a font which...okay? tbh, i think looks exactly like i want jk's handwriting to look. like its very swirly, he is my calligraphy king. i didn't proof it bc i just wrote...all of it tonight like a weird crazy person.
also i realize jk sounds...a lot like me
— but he Is me, tbh?
like in some facets i did give him lil pieces of myself so he could grow into an uber tall thicc as hell academic hot jersey talk shit get hit boy.
( i also do think he's a lot goofier with stan in his little letters esp since he doesn't think that anyone is going to read them they are just his lil vent space. let it out king! )
as for the timeline...i think it's pre!rm bonus content? like i dropped a little context about stuff that happened before the fic, but i think it's probably written anywhere in the last 1-2 years of rm before kyle went to that crimson dawn concert. i'm not sure what compelled me to write it i just...really like vulnerable jersey just being a jersey dirtbag but like kneeling by the stan shrine and asking for light.
speaking of...as far as triggers go. mostly the spelling is just bad, help, but jersey does talk a lot about stan dying and is very...distressed about it. he's also...really depressed and is not at the moment coping super well, but is reaching out for help. <3 always reach out for help when you need it. i didn't mention anything specific, but he does just mention thinking he's not a good person, feeling ugly, unworthy, lost, etc...TW FOR HIM BEING SO VULNERABLE AND CUTE ALSO.
he is...my secret loverboy prince.
he is my lo-...
my L-
anyways...ROLL CLIP!
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#i cannot tell u what compelled me to make...this#but it did make me feel nice so idk its not the most professional or formulaic thing ive ever written#but i think its nice i am sorry if the found is too gnar i really wanted to do a jk letter in like a letter structure for once#also this is it so funny to me that jk out here trying to rizz himself up to fucking dead GHOST stan like he is insane#also im like oh god does he sound too much like me?? BUT HE IS ME I GAVE HIM LOTS OF ME IDK AAAA SORRY#he is a lovely man when hes not being horrible and i am Also a sweet lovely man when im not being horrible#but idk him giving stan all the cute nicknames and like writing a letter and for the first time in a very long time#wasnt completely honest but was mostly honest about just not being the best and needing to be and needin someone else#OOOOOOOOY MY EYES ARE WATCHING HELP ME#no im so sorry if u were victimized by sexy topdom jersey sometimes he is like on critical boyfailurisms#he wants to impress like one motherfucker and its dead stan marsh like HAUNT ME PROMISE ME#HAUNT ME LIKE AN OLD VICTORIAN HOUSE AN UNDERWATER SHIPWRECK when i tell u i was in pain#also not him just building his ideal boyfriend like he won i love you jersey SPEAKING OF DO U SEE HIM#DO YOU SEE HIM TRYING TO DO IT HES TRYING TO TYPE THE!!!! IM TELLING YALL HE CANT DO IT#HE COULDNT EVEN TELL DEAD STAN ANYWAYS THAT AS MAKING ME CRY sorry ill proof it a lots wrong w it#i am very sleepy nina please stop...not sleeping from stress#but i hope it pleases and sparkles <3
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you ever click on an article quoted in a tumblr post because you wanna verify that it says what it purports to say, and while reading the article, youre like okay, its odd for an article published in 2023 to be relying on a 2016 stat that is surveyed by a government body annually so you click on the link to that and instead of taking you to the 2016 survey, it links to a dissertation written in 2022, but okay whatever its probably quoted in this dissertation, so you ctrl F and type in the stat to make sure and okay it does so you scroll down to the references so you can just copy and paste the survey reference into google scholar, but the survey isnt in the references, so you scroll back up and read the paragraph the stat was quoted in to see that this dissertation is quoting the stat from a different paper that quotes it, so you take note of that paper and scroll back down and okay theres two references that match this, so back up you scroll and its not made clear in the paragraph which of the two theyre quoting, and oh my god do i have to read 15 pages of this dissertation to be able to figure out which quotes the stat from the survey, 15 pages, mind you, of the dissertation that an article - that i was originally reading to verify a tumblr post - sources for a stat taken from a government survey rather than the survey itself.
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dbphantom · 3 months
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Hate having adhd went to go work on my fallout modpack, got distracted while going to disable the steam overlay, ended up in the points shop, went to go edit my profile, decided to change my pfp, found a buried folder I forgot existed, found some old Veneer art I forgot existed, spent 45 minutes looking at all the old photos, STILL HAVE NOT TOGGLED ONE SIMPLE OPTION THAT SHOULD'VE TAKEN 30 SECONDS AT MOST
#I'm shocked I have these drawings scanned on my pc I don't remember doing that I must've done it before I left in case my mom threw all my#Art out again#Anyway at age 12 I was writing a better '3 merpeople go on land to find a 4th one that has been disguised as a human all his life' story#Than Ma/ko Merm/aids EVER did so uh. Take that Jonathan#God it sucks so bad that kid me would've LOVED MM if it just DIDN'T HAVE THE STUPID GENDER WAR BULLSHIT#Literally the entire first and second season is just. So fucking stupid. I wrote a God damn essay about how they fumbled Erik's story SO BAD#I don't even LIKE Erik BUT THEY DID HIM SO DIRTY#THE CHARACTER POTENTIAL AND WRITING COULD'VE BEEN BETTER THAN ZANE B. S1 OF H2O BUT THEY THREW IT AWAY AND FOR WHAT!!!!!!!#Seriously you're telling me a kid who was abandoned his entire life for being male didn't have a bigger impact on the pod than FUCKING ZAK?#That plot twist of 'oh actually Zak was a merman all along' was 100% so they could guilt free write Erik out#Instead of like. Having him face his actions or redeem himself in like. Any way. He just fucks off. THEN the pod is like lol Zac were sorry#We're sorry for literally not doing anything to you because you were privledged enough to have a mother who was super ultra powerful#So you were never really affected by our actions until JUST now. Unlike that other fuckface Erik who suffered his whole life alone#Also then in s3 there are STILL no mermen in the pod. Not even little mermen babies. No kids and teens they've welcomed back n apologized to#NOTHING#God. Mm pisses me off dude#AND I STILL HAVENT TOGGLED THAT FUCKING OPTIONS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#Cruddy rambles#God I'm not done I'm sorry fallout can wait YOU ARE TELLING ME THE GUY WHO TELLS US HOW SHITTY MERMAN BABIES R TREATED BY THE POD. IS NOT#THE SAME ONE THE POD APOLOGIZES TO IN THE SEASON FINALE BECAUSE THEY WROTE IN A SHITTY PLOT TWIST?#AUUUUUUUHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG#It's so bad. It's so fucking bad. It's so needlessly gendered and for what. They could've just had 2 rival warring pods#What pisses me off the most is that s3 (4) completely pivots and never really follows thru with the s1 and 2 story arcs#The writers just kinda wash thsir hands of that because 'hey the pod said sorry to zac' BUT THEN NOTHING ACTUALLY CHANGES!!!!#Maybe instead of having a constantly rotating cast of characters s3 (4) could've instead focused on Ondina and Erik's relationship a bit#Maybe have Ondina tell him she wants to just stay friends because she can't trust him. Have him IDK grow and change as a character?#Maybe so you can show kids nobody is born evil and we all need support systems and healthy relationships to grow and become better people??#THAT would've been a GOOD FOLLOW THROUGH#But no instead u just write him out of the show and never show any OTHER mermen who were exiled being welcomed back#Like u had Ondina becoming a teacher... Why not have Zac become a teacher for all the new mermen who were just recently welcomed back??
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the-meme-monarch · 1 year
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i also think the music ban is probably not real because swatch talks about queen asking them to write rap anthems for her. k_k keeping the other two from actually breaking into the palace because if they did they'd see swatch making music and be like hey,
they Do mention that she banned all music except for The Kind She Likes (being reverse diss tracks/ stuff praising queen, and noise music) but like. why does no one mention a music ban except scc. there is a plugboy who wants to join the rebellion but they Never mention that it’s. about music. i think it’s entirely possible that the plugboy would want to join a revolution against queen when at the beginning of the dark world we see there were countless terrified plugboys talking about and getting wired Bc Of Queen.
AND swatch and queen both talk about music at separate points, like you said about them saying they write bitcrushed rap anthems for her, and the whole scene in the car w noelle and her mixtape. they could have very easily had a line about “yeah btw all other music is cancelled bc I/Queen Said So”
I’m picturing sweet and/or capn coming home like “Queen banned music!!! can you fucking BELIEVE THAT???” and kk is just thinking to himself ‘not in the slightest. but i can see you’re going through something’ so he plays along
i think out of the three of them sweet probably would’ve been the most willing to break into queen’s basement to help spamton get the neo suit bc ‘yeah I’ve just been basically betrayed by someone i thought was my friend and you seem to be on my side so sure I’ll do something potentially very illegal for you’ and then kk has to give them a scare story on Why We Don’t Want To Risk Getting Arrested
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dutybcrne · 3 months
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Kaeya: Diluc gets rid of things he doesn’t need anymore…with how much he resents me, I must be no different-
Diluc:
Never banned Kaeya from the tavern, even with their History and how much Kaeya pesters him there nor makes any moves to
Kept every single letter Kaeya wrote to him while in Snezhnaya, which was also the vast majority correspondence penned by one person he kept in the Winery's stash (every Letter in Beautiful Handwriting/Hidden Strife Event)
Kept the fucken vase Kaeya used on a whim to give his Vision back in, even if it did NOT match the decor of the Winery (Genshin Manga/Venti SQ/Kaeya Hangout)
Was extremely patient with Kaeya accusing him of casting aside Crepus' legacy in response to him telling Kaeya to drink responsibly (Venti SQ)
In that same dialogue, was more in disbelief/offended that Kaeya seemed to believe he would ever think of callously throwing him out than by Kae's comment abt Crepus of all things (Venti SQ)
Stayed with Kaeya on the island the entire time, no matter how much they bickered, even though he could have gone after one of the others or even taken off on his own like they did instead (Midsummer Island Adventure)
Was genuinely surprised/touched when Kae revealed he thought fondly of their childhood days gathering seashells (Echoing Tales)
Let himself get arrested for Kaeya’s harebrained scheme to save a little girl Luc didn't even know about previously, and RIGHT after Kaeya outright accused HIM of being the murderer too (Genshin Manga)
Gave Kaeya a free drink without being asked when he came to visit him to deliver the aforementioned vase after the scheme was complete (Genshin Manga)
Never refuted Kaeya's claim that Dawn Winery was his home too, nor Kae's claims that people had every right to visit 'home' during festival seasons (Weinlesefest)
Let Kaeya score free booze for the Knights to distribute for the Weinlesefest to help better their image, that Lisa specifically sent Kaeya to ask of Diluc bc she KNEW Diluc wouldn’t say no to him (Weinlesefest)
Expressed he would have Elzer speak with Hertha bc Kaeya mentioned the Knights' financial situation as an afterthought, despite how much Diluc dislikes the Knights (Weinlesefest)
Got moody bc Kaeya didn’t want to stay for dinner and IMMEDIATELY jumped at the chance to make Kaeya stay when Addie intervened to insist (Weinlesefest)
Lets and NEVER stops the servants from referring to Kaeya as ‘master’ too (They do so freely in front of him in Weinlesefest & Kaeya Hangout in particular)
Was perfectly okay with Kaeya staying at the Winery when he left, even after their dispute (Letter with Clear Handwriting/Hidden Strife)
Always remembers every single one of Kaeya’s silly excuses to try and get free wine out of him, and teases him for forgetting which he’s already used & precisely how long ago he did (Kaeya Hangout)
Is said, by Elzer, to in fact be completely fine with Kaeya stealing drinks from the Winery, even if he outwardly complains abt it (Kaeya Hangout)
Solemnly asks about Kaeya when he thinks Kaeya already left, and unpromptedly talks him up to Traveler in regards to Kae's own ability to the Winery (Kaeya Hangout)
#//The fact that this list is so LONG speaks for itself jdngft#//Fruits of my research for a Thing I'm writing and I just#//cjkbrdg#☆ ┆ ( .ooc. );#//I think my favorite detail is Luc getting pissy Kae didn’t want to stay and dine during Weinlesefest; like bro#//What did you THINK he was gonna do when you greeted him so coldly compared to Traveler djfbfb#//Luc is SO doting and Kae’s just#//‘Hm he’s changed too much since we were kids…he’s gonna throw me out of his life as easy as he sold our childhood home-‘#//I still find it so funny that THAT was Kae’s tirade of a response to Luc telling him to drink responsibly#//Like#//mans fucken ESCALATED that so gottdam fast#//Kae feels uncertain in his own hangout abt going to the Winery when Luc is there; when the man was prolly happy to see him stop by#//Moody yes; but then you talk to Luc AFTERwards; and he’s asking if Kae left yet like he didn’t actually WANT him to#//The mixed fucken messages; I swear to fucken god#//My goddamn clowns#//Their fight made difficult for them both to communicate things at times; but it's ironically KAEYA who finds it the hardest#//KAEYA who can smoothtalk his way through practically anything and can seemingly handle people & tough situations with such ease#//Meanwhile Diluc is continuously showing his care the best way he knows how via these indirect/wordless gestures#//Also can we give props to how Luc didn't even WANT to admit he kept the vase in Venti SQ but outright TELLS Kae he kept it in his Hangout#//The GROWTH. That or Luc's getting real tired of Kae acting like he doesn't care/want him around mdfbfkgf#//He's so fucken doting; I C R Y#//Such good big bro#//Weinlesefest's things will forever my faves tho kjgf#//'Surely you wouldn't DREAM of DISAPPOINTING ADELINDE?' Oh I bet Addie wouldn't be the ONLY one so disappointed by Kae not staying ngvsfdg
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bunnihearted · 2 months
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#yeah so the problem is that ... i fuck things up :(((#i know that i mattered to him i felt that he cared and that i was important#like honestly it's one of the few times i've ever felt it#but then comes the fucking bpd and avpd insecurity#like if i just one time perceive that oh im annoying#then i just pull back and think am i crazy why could anyone not think im annoying#even if i got reassurance multiple times i was like still .. it was still so hard for me#and like with everything i write on here it makes it seem like i dont care or dont value etc etc#also like :(( im not too fragile to hear abt problems or troubles. i make it seem like its that way#but i WANT to be here and listen to the person i care for. it's not too much for me and idk with how emotionally intense i am#idk how to show that... and im too scared of expressing positive emotions bc i fear being ridiculed by the universe#and it all gets so wrong bc he never made me feel ashamed or stupid or too much#he made me feel the opposite!!!! it was me who made it seem like i didnt care it was me who pulled back#it's so sad and frustrating bc the entire time i kept thinking to myself dont ruin this dont ruin this#be aware of the avpd symptoms and stop them pls dont ruin this#and i tried but in hindsight and with more context clues from the other perspective..#i realized that what i felt wasnt shown... :(((#so i am upset bc im not 'losing' someone (romantically) who doesnt value or care for me#it's someone who i did matter to who did care for me and want me#who i was too scared too fearful to be brave and show him and let him#god.. i hate myself so much!!!#and i do hate myself bc of this. bc it has happened before#it happened now with the most important person to me#and it will happen again#and idk.. bc my brain is also so stupid bc#NOW i know. now im not scared anymore with that person. but it's too late :c#(like i thought i shouldve given space but then i get anxious and i pull away too much and idk how to find the balance)
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