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#O YEA LINKS AWAKENING.
kitttwilight · 3 months
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i've been a zelda fan for more than 4 years. my biggest embarrassment is that i own all of the games (except four swords xd) but have only beat ... like 3 of them
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starcrossedxwriter · 1 year
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Built for Love Part 9 (MBJ x Famous Black OC)
Warnings: If graphic depictions of violence and abuse are triggering for you, PLEASE SKIP THE ENTIRE ITALICIZED SECTION. It is a flashback and it is graphic.
A/N: Please heed the above warning if you need it! It gets worse before it gets better for our girl :(
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Shallow pants filled the hallway as Charlotte clutched the side of a concessions stand. Her heart felt as if it was going to beat right out of her chest. 
She had no real coherent thoughts, only flashes of his smirk, his menacing eyes. And all she felt was panic and terror, as if he awakened true fear in her body that she thought was long buried. 
“Hey!” Charlotte immediately straightened up as she heard Malcolm’s voice. She dusted off her clothes and cleared her throat, desperate hoping her panic and heart rate would decrease. “Chris sent me to find you. You good? You look like you’re having a panic attack.” 
She nodded, her hand still pressing into her chest. “Y-yea, y-yea. I j-just f-freaked out… with… t-the audience,” she forced out. “J-just panicked f-for a sec.” 
She could not tell if he believed her, that it was just the audience, his eyes were filled with concern but there was a thread of skepticism there too. 
“Ok, well take a beat, take a breath. I’ll tell Chris you need a minute.” 
She took a few deep breaths, forcing all that fear and panic back to a figurative box. She could not figure this out right now. She had a job to do and she would have to push through. 
“I’m o-ok, I’m ok.”
“Ok, you ready to head back in? Chris wants to start.” 
She nodded, “Yea, yea. Let’s… let’s do it.” 
Charlotte barely remembered her lines, songs, or cues as she moved through the rehearsal like a robot. She was by far the weakest link among the cast, which was surprising to everyone, since she was typically running circles around everyone. She was thankful that none of the investors, including Shaun, stuck around long after rehearsal. He did not have a chance to speak to her or get close to her as she immediately exited the stage once Chris dismissed them. He merely threw her one last grin before he walked out the door.
Charlotte raced to the nearest bathroom, her quick lunch soon staring back at her. By the time she made it back to her dressing room to change and head home, she was barely standing, emotionally and physically drained. For a few moments, she just sat there, unmoving, staring at her reflection in the vanity mirror. 
She wanted to scream or cry or rage or break something. But instead, she just stared into space and at her reflection, spiraling into a deep despair she had not experienced in a long time. 
This was her own doing, she realized. She underestimated him, however he had managed to weasel his way into her world. She, foolishly, let herself believe time had dulled whatever impulse he had with her. His desire to control her new no bounds, defied the very laws of human nature in her opinion to move on. She had moved on, moved her life forward, and he was still frozen in time. That sort of relentless drive, he’d never stop. And that meant, she did not know if she could stay there. 
She knew as soon as Michael learned he was floating around, or worse, her family, they would encourage her to leave. And she did not see a world in which she could convince them it was safe for her to stay. Nor did she even believe herself it was safe. He did not do all of this to get close to her for no reason, and she knew the reason could not be good. She felt as if this was an impossible situation with no outcome that worked in her favor. 
However, despite the scenarios running through her head, the likelihoods and odds she knew to be true, the knowledge that her safest bet was to get on a plane and go home, she could not find any of them reason enough to actually do it. 
She stared around this dressing room and she saw it, everything she had dreamed and worked for her entire life. When she left the first time, that was a means of survival. What were dreams when your only goal was keeping blood pumping through your veins? Her life quite literally hung on that decision so she never regretted it, not much. But she knew, if she abandoned the dream again after breathing new life into it, she would never forgive herself. Her soul would never be at peace again. That’s why she was even driven to come back, her soul needed this. She had jumped and grasped at this dream and she refused to allow him or the mistakes of her past dictate whether she seized it. 
Reason fought her. She was courting fire, playing right into Shaun’s game. He wanted to be in her life, however he managed it. And she would never win against him. Those thoughts were loud, the realities pushed against her dreams, her human instinct to protect her physical body demanded she see reason. 
It was a tough decision. And one she knew she had to make alone. Because the moment Michael or any of her family, people she trusted for sage advice, found out, they would make the decision for her. Her brothers would sooner hogtie her and force her on a plane before they allowed her to be in his presence ever again. And she understood that impulse, knew the pain and trauma they all went through when she was with Shaun. But still, was even that reason enough? 
She shed her clothes of Ashley as her brain battled for the path forward. She had no idea what to do.  
“You got a sec?” 
Charlotte turned to find Malcolm waiting for her in the doorway of her dressing room. Internally, her entire body sagged. She knew he was likely there to inquire about her lackluster performance but she had no words or excuses. She was terrible and everyone knew it. However, still she dug as deep as she could to force a smile on her face. 
“All the seconds in the world for you. What’s up?” She could hear how labored and tired those few words sounded, how fake the pep she infused into them felt in the space. 
“Wanted to see if you were feeling better? You seemed out of it up there?” 
“Y-yea. Sorry, I know today wasn’t my best. I’ll be better for tomorrow night. Think I just need some rest.” 
“Ok well, before you go, can I show you something?”
She nodded, grabbing her coat and bag to follow him. They weaved through the backstage, which was almost empty save one or two people. She had not realized how long she sat in her dressing room. They finally stopped when they were center stage of the theater, the lights were dimmed but she could still see all the seats and boxes and all of its glory. 
“Just thought you deserved a minute of quiet here without everyone. Starting tomorrow, this room is gonna be filled with thousands applauding for you every night.”
She let out a breathless sigh as she stood in the middle of the stage. She closed her eyes and if she thought back hard enough, she could remember what that was like. The thrill, the joy, it was truly intoxicating. 
She only opened her eyes when she heard his words. 
“Don’t let him take this from you again, Charlotte. You’ll never forgive yourself.” 
She stilled before turning on her heels to face him. How could he know? She thought to herself. He couldn’t possibly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 
“Yea you do. Look… I won’t claim to know what he put you through. But I do know that you survived. You left and you survived and you came back here to claim what’s yours. That’s a hell a lot more than many women can say. Don’t let him run you outta here like he still has power.” 
She shook her head. “H-How’d you…” she did not know what she even wanted to know… how’d he know her secret when she never told anyone and how’d he know she was considering leaving. 
He scratched his head. “Let’s just say I’ve seen women in the same situation you were. Took me a while to notice the signs with you, I’ll admit. And one interaction with him to confirm those suspicions. You really are a damn good actress. But it’s always in the eyes… That's the one place the facade could never quite reach. No one else knew or suspected from what I could tell.” 
Charlotte cast her eyes down at the weathered stage, her hands picking at the soft fabric of her black leggings. “You never said anything.” 
He nodded. “And when you quit and left so abruptly, I wondered if that was the right choice. My aunt’s ex was like him and one time, she told me that the one thing she needed but never had was a friend who just could be there. Wasn’t trying to tell her things she already knew or preach to her or force her out of a situation she wasn’t ready to leave. She just needed someone to create a space for her to be her. The show always seemed like that for you… the one space to be you. I didn’t want to take that away from you.”
She chuckled, wiping the tears that streamed down her face. 
“Not much of a safe space anymore. I don’t even know what he’s doing here. H-He hated musicals and shit like this.” 
“Yea but he’s obsessed with money and you so this gives him both,” Malcolm mused. “W-when I recognized who he was, I spoke to him after you went back to your dressing room… before he left. He manages Issac Simmons’ investment portfolio. He’s invested in six award winning musicals and plays. But you know rich white folk, they never do the overseeing themselves. He hires an investment firm to manage all of his investments, monitor, and make sure they’re profitable. Shaun’s overseeing his portfolio. Issac attends meetings for the show as a producer and he gets to attend for the financial piece of it. How he managed that, I have no idea.” 
Charlotte let out a humorless chuckle. “That was always m-my problem with him. I u-underestimate him the extent of his cruelty every time… at my own peril. Probably planned this the moment I left, knowing I’d be back.” She let out a strangled sigh. “I can’t leave a-and I can’t stay. I don’t know what to do,” she laughed, the laugh filled with exasperation and fear and frustration that she felt in her dressing room, the battles that existed in her head.
“You don’t gotta keep making the same mistakes. And you don’t have to let him win.” 
She shook her head. “I’m not letting him win! He just wins… he’s bigger and stronger and smarter and faster. I c-can’t…” she paused. “I can’t fight him and I can’t beat him. I never could. A-and it's not just me I have to think about… Michael and my family… I can’t put them through what happened last time.” 
“In all this, I haven’t heard one thing… what it is you want. What do you want, Charlotte?”
“I want this!” She spun around, gesturing at the theater. “I know I talk big shit about awards b-but I-I can live without ever winning a single award for what I do. I d-don’t care about that part of it. I… I can live without all that. But I-I c-can’t live without this. Without knowing that I had what it took to perform on t-the stage as a lead and that I t-took the steps to achieve something I’ve wanted m-most of my life. For as long as I could want to be a-anything, I wanted to be this. A-and if I never get nominated, fine. If I never win, f-fine. That’s ok because, at least, I achieved this.”
“Want my advice?” 
“Please.” She settled on the edge of the stage, her feet dangling into the orchestra pit.
“I know it doesn’t feel like it today because seeing him brought up old shit. But you are a totally different woman than the last time he saw you. What’d you do when you were in LA?” 
She shrugged, unsure of where his advice was headed. “I j-just tried to find myself again and happiness… I guess. Found hobbies and just tried to live again. I dunno.” 
“Did you?” 
A small but distinct smile settled on her features as she thought about her friends and family, Michael, and her career. 
“Y-yea I did. But…” 
“No. No buts. You found you again. The only reason he had power over you back then is because you thought you had nothing without him. You thought you were nothing without him. But then you left and you took it all back. You took the broken pieces he left you with and made something new and stronger. You are stronger than he realizes or you even realize. He’s betting on you cowering, he’s betting on you giving up. What would happen if you actually got in the ring this time and fought for what you wanted?”
“What about Michael a-and my family? They’ll never accept me staying here with him back in the picture. My dreams or not.” 
“Look…” he sat down next to her. “Your family wants to keep you alive and healthy. So do I. But I… I’m selfish,” he admitted. “I know it and I’ve always owned that about myself. Because I care more about whether my decisions bring me peace at night, not whether others can accept them. You could call Chris tomorrow and tell him you quit and run back to LA. No one would fault you for choosing safety over this. Your family will breathe easier, the man you love will breathe easier and in some ways you will too. But,” he paused, glancing at her. 
“Will your soul breathe easier? Will your heart allow you to rest at night knowing you had a chance to fight for the future you want and you didn’t take it? If the answer is yes, then maybe you don’t want this and what it represents. And that’s ok too. No judgment. But the Charlie Chris told me about… the Charlie he met as an annoying freshman, his words not mine,” he added as a caveat that made Charlie grin. “The Charlie I met on my first day in Chicago who exudes star power from every pore of her very soul, the Charlie Chris staked his reputation to bring back… he told me that that girl would claw her way through mud, glass, and landmines to get what she wanted. He said she was unapologetic in her pursuit of her dreams. So if you got any of that girl left in you and have any doubt about your answer, then have that boyfriend of yours teach you some boxing moves and get in the ring. End this your way. Not his.” 
“I really hate that everyone uses boxing metaphors with me now,” she huffed, rolling her eyes. She pulled her legs into her chest. She knew he was right, this was what she wanted. But she did not feel strong enough to do what he was talking about. She was not equipped for this, the fight. She had never done it before. “I don’t know how to fight him and if I lose, there are no redos this time. I got a second chance… doubt I’ll get a third,” she admitted, what she was truly afraid of. That she was about to gamble her life on this dream.  
“You want a hard truth? No one knows how to fight until they have to, Charlie. Until one day, you realize something in you will die if you don’t. Whether it be your soul, your heart, your dreams, your purpose, or your physical body. Whatever. So you fight for that, for that thing you know you can’t live without. And you fight like hell because there’s no other option.  You’ll get hit, you’ll get knocked down. And it’s gonna hurt like hell. Sometimes you might get knocked out of the ring altogether. But you stay in the fight until you have nothing left. That’s life, that’s the gig. You ain’t the first person to feel ill-equipped for the fight and you won’t be the last. But I don’t know anyone who regrets fighting, just a lot of people who regret running, even with all the odds stacked against them.”
“And if I lose?” 
He pushed up his shoulders in a shrug. “You have to decide what’s more important, Charlotte. Do you want survival with a dark cloud over you or do you want to fight for the life you actually want? No one can decide if the risk is worth it for you. Not me, not your family, and not that man of yours. It’s your life… make the choice that gives you peace.” He patted her knee before pushing himself up to stand. He dusted off his pants before helping Charlotte to her feet. “I should head home, kids’ are with my parents so it’s date night. See you tomorrow?”  
She could hear the hopefulness in his voice, the silent prayer that curved around every word that her answer would be yes. 
Her eyes followed the gold trim on the walls, imagining her family and Michael cheering for her in the front row. She was tired of running away from this, tired of letting him steal good things from her. She wanted a good thing, she deserved and earned this good thing. And she was going to take it. 
“Yea.” She smiled as his whole body visibly relaxed and he let out a sigh of relief. “And I’ll be better… stronger than I was today. Thank you.” She hoped those two simple words conveyed her thanks, her appreciation for pulling her back from the edge of a decision she would have regretted her whole life.
He laid his hand on his lapel of his jacket and winked at her before exiting the theater, leaving Charlotte alone. 
She sighed and glanced around before nodding. This was her choice and her life. She knew what she had to do and it would not be easy but it would be worth it. It had to be. 
When she finally made her way home and up to their apartment, she was not surprised to find Michael already lounging in bed, shirtless, watching anime. 
“Wasn’t sure when you’d be back so I just got pizza. You didn’t respond to my texts? You ok? You look beat.” 
She watched him for a moment before sitting down on the bench at the end of her bed to take off her shoes. She took a deep breath and lied. She was fighting to have it all… her life and her dream. And the only way she could see to achieve that was to keep the amazing and protective man lounging in their bed at an arm’s length, for as long as she could. 
She knew this plan relied heavily on luck and prayer. Prayer that all the chips fell exactly as they should so Michael and her family’s path never crossed with Shaun’s. There were so many ways this could unravel and she knew it. But even if she had to hold it all together with scotch tape and luck, she would do it. She didn’t need luck forever. She needed it for a few months. 
“Yea, everything’s good,” she said sweetly as she walked around to kiss him. She perched on the edge of the bed next to him. “Rehearsal was j-just brutal. Day before previews, everyone’s just on edge. Wasn’t anyone’s best I don’t think. How are you?” 
“Good, I went to the comic book store and did some research. Think I got every issue featuring Killmonger they had. I remember some of it from when I read it the first time but lots of good info. Why don’t we run you a bath before dinner and then you can tell me all about rehearsals?”
“Sounds heavenly but I’d much rather you join me so I can hear about your day. I don’t even want to think about the show. Tell me everything you learned.” She rubbed his leg before getting up to retreat to their bathroom. 
“Want some wine?” 
“You know me so well,” she moaned. “You get the goods and I’ll start the bath.” 
She watched him for a moment as he rolled off the bed to go to their bar. Charlotte retreated into the bathroom and slumped against the vanity. 
“This is a terrible idea,” She whispered to herself before walking to their tub. But it would work. It had to. 
***
“Great show everyone! Found some minor things to tweak for tomorrow but it was truly stellar.”
The entire cast cheered, Charlotte hugging everyone she passed as they made their way backstage, their first official night of previews done and dusted. 
As soon as the curtains fell and the applause died down, Charlotte finally let out a sigh of relief she did not know she was holding in. She did it and it was amazing. She had thought rehearsals were thrilling but she had forgotten how truly otherworldly performing in front of a sold-out crowd was. And for the house to be so packed on their first night, she had no regrets. 
She was not surprised to find a certain actor waiting for her when she returned to her dressing room, a bright bouquet of flowers in his hand. Charlotte immediately threw herself in his arms, Michael lifting her off the ground. 
“Els! Baby girl! You were fuckin’ phenomanal. That was amazing. You were perfect.” 
“Thank you, baby.” She only had eyes for Michael while she performed. Every time she looked out into the crowd, she zeroed in on him, performing for him. And his reassuring smile gave her all the small boosts of confidence she needed to make it to the end of the show. She pulled back to look at him, her eyes searching his. “Y-You really liked it??” 
He laughed. “I loved it. It was a really great story, the songs were perfect. You and Malcolm’s energy was insane. I’m excited to see it again once it opens officially.” 
Charlotte’s entire body seemed to light up and glow, his opinion the only one she truly cared about. “Really?” 
“Yes.” He captured her lips. “I see why he fought so hard to get you to join, that role was made for you. Congrats. Let’s go out and celebrate. Take you to dinner and then we can continue the celebration at home.” 
She leaned into his embrace, her arm lazily wrapped around her shoulder. “Can we just go celebrate at home? My only idea of celebrating right now is being in your arms.” 
“Anything you want.” Charlotte quickly changed out of her clothes and headed out the back door, surprised to find a few people waiting back there for a glimpse of them. She stopped and took a picture or two before heading into their car.
Michael continued to show her with praise the entire car ride and as they entered the apartment. She listened to his favorite parts and his one or two small critiques that she found incredibly insightful while getting ready for bed. 
When she climbed into bed, she straddled his hips, her favorite spot to have true heart to hearts with him. 
“Thank you,” she whispered, kissing him softly. 
“For what?” His tone told her that he didn’t know what he was being thanked for. 
“For supporting me. I wouldn’t have been able to do what I did tonight without you. Every time I looked at you in the crowd, I felt th-this surge of confidence and reassurance. I-Its just… t-thank you.” She cupped his face. “Thank you for loving me.” 
His hands pulled her into his chest to kiss her deeply. “You never have to thank me for that.” 
He flipped her onto her back and pulled off her nightgown, his body settling between her legs.
“I think the star of the night deserves a bit of extra attention?” He whispered as he pushed a finger inside her, 
Charlotte’s back arching off the bed in pleasure. 
And for one night, she didn’t think about all the notes she had for herself on her performance, she didn’t stress over what everyone else thought, and she did not think about Shaun. She just enjoyed the bliss of a good night with her boyfriend. This is what she was fighting for and it was worth it. 
***
Charlotte pulled lasagna, Shaun’s favorite out of the oven, his birthday cake she spent all day making sitting perfectly on the glass display on the kitchen island. She had made all of his favorites, put on his favorite dress, all to ensure his birthday was perfect and special. His gift was neatly wrapped on the dining room table, an expensive watch he had dropped a million not-so-subtle hints that he wanted. She glanced at the clock as she continued finishing everything up, expecting him to waltz through the door at any moment. 
She did not have to wait long as she heard his key enter the door. She immediately and quickly checked her hair and make-up in the hall mirror to ensure she looked perfect for his special day, just as he would want her, before greeting him at the front door. Her bright smile faltered as she saw his friends in tow behind him. 
“H-hey babe. Happy Birthday! I didn’t know we were having company?” She offered, her voice remaining bright and sweet so as to not frustrate him. 
“The boys decided they wanted to watch the game tonight.” She glanced at the takeout bags in their hands of burgers and fries.
She glanced toward the kitchen, the meal she had spent all day preparing, unable to stop the way her lips tugged downward. 
“I cooked? Just like you wanted.” 
He gestured toward the living room, his four friends filing out of the entryway and getting settled. His best friend, Marcus, turned on the tv and basketball game loudly. 
“I don’t want that shit.” He threw at her, frustration coursing through her. But still, she could not let it show. She merely smiled and nodded.
“I-It’s your day, love. Whatever you want. I’ll just put the other stuff away for us tomorrow.” 
She hesitated before kissing him on the lips, hoping it would ease his anger. She doubted it. She used to be able to soothe him, early on, with physical affection and more intimate activities but not anymore. It was rare when there was anything she could do to make him forget he was angry, forget to rain those blows down on her, forget to hurt her in other ways. 
“You look fuckin’ terrible in that dress.” He did not bother to whisper that one, all of his friends pretending they were more engrossed in the game than his rude comment. 
She glanced down at her outfit, suddenly she could only focus on her flaws that it accentuated and how it was looser than she remembered. She had lost so much weight in the last couple of months as things between Shaun and her continued to deteriorate. Her weight had always been one of his favorite things to criticize. She was down to a size 2 and he still thought she looked fat… and so did she.  
“O-Oh I thought you liked this one,” she offered, her hands running down the front of the dress, which used to hug her soft curves and ass. It was revealing, low cut and shorter than Charlotte’s usual taste. But he had picked it out and often demanded she wear it. So she thought it was her best option for the day.
“It just makes you look like a fuckin’ whore. But maybe that’s good.” The word stung but she kept her face neutral, as neutral as she could. “High time my friends saw what type of woman you really are. They think you’re so perfect and pristine.” She tried to stop it but she couldn’t stop the way she flinched as he brought his hand to her face. However, the sharp bite of a slap never came. Though she could tell he found it amusing that she was expecting it. He did grip her chin though, painfully but not excruciating, forcing her eyes to his. “Maybe we could put on a show for them.” His voice dropped again, ensuring that no one but Charlotte could hear his threats. “You’d like that, wouldn’t you, baby?” 
“No,” she asserted defiantly. 
He merely looked her up and down and offered a small “hm” and sinister smile before demanding she got them plates and utensils for their food. 
She quickly retreated to the kitchen, her hands shaking as she rummaged through their kitchen to find everything they needd. 
“That cake looks great, Charlie!” Donovan called from the couch. 
Charlotte could not help but beam a bit, the first nice word said to her all day. She knew she would get no such praise or compliments from the man she made it for so she would take it wherever she got it. However, when she glanced up and found Shaun’s eyes piercing into hers, her small glow dimmed to darkness immediately. Her thank you was barely audible over the loud tv. 
She wished she could return to their room while the boys hung out, escaping his glare. However, she knew she would not be so lucky when he summoned her into the living room and pulled her onto his lap. His grip around her waist was tight, nearly painful as he kept her there, forcing her to watch the game with them. She did not even understand basketball. He only let her go once to get him another drink before he forced her back on his lap again. 
She hated it and he knew it. Knew how uncomfortable it made her and he savored it. It was not just being on display, but feeling the simmering anger beneath the surface that no one else could see or feel. It was like being forced to watch someone build the stake you were to be burned at, knowing every moment it grew taller and taller meant certain pain and death for her. He wanted her to feel it, know punishment was coming. Sometimes she knew why and others she didn’t. But it was the fear he enjoyed, he wanted her to sit in terror every second while they laughed and cracked jokes.
“Shaun told us you’re playing the lead in your show tomorrow night?” His friend, Jason, offered as the game went to commercial. “Chicago right?” 
Charlotte did not take her eyes off her lap but she offered him a strained smile and nod. 
“That’s what’s up!” 
“Congrats!” 
All of his friends’ congratulations rang out around her. She just said thank you before turning her attention back to the game, hoping the attention would not cause the rage already simmering to turn to a boil. 
“Damn Shaun, you gotta a superstar on your hands there. Ready for that trophy husband life?” Donovon joked, all the boys laughing and joking about how they’d gladly become stay at home husbands’ to a powerful woman. 
Shaun’s laughter filled her ears but she was the only one who heard the fakeness of it, the fury that colored the edges and stole any genuine amusement from his tone. She desperately wanted to find something else to do, somewhere else to be. But she knew he could sense that, her fear that made her want to flee, through the tightened grip around her stomach. 
“Yea, baby girl is something alright…” he placed a gentle kiss to her spine and Charlotte recognized the secret message in it immediately, that it would be the last stroke of gentleness she felt that night.
She had hoped to make it to tomorrow’s show without a bruise so she could perform at her best. It was her first night as the lead, taking over for an actress who had to have emergency surgery. It was her dream and she wanted it to be perfect. But tonight had been one misstep after another, despite her best efforts. She would not make it to the stage tomorrow unscathed, she could only pray he showed her mercy and exercised some control so she could still perform. 
“So what about that cake though?” Donovan asked, glancing at the kitchen as the final quarter winded down. 
“Y-Yea, I can cut y-y’all some,” she made a move to go into the kitchen when he held her tighter, halting her movements.
“No baby, let me.” 
He stood and Charlotte settled in his seat, her eyes trained on the tv and none of the men seated around her.  
“Babe! Can you help me for a second?” 
She immediately excused herself, rushing into the kitchen to find him staring down at the cake. She noticed that he had scooted it closer to the edge of the island from its original spot in the dead center. He had a knife wrapped in his hand, waving it around casually as he examined Charlotte’s day’s work. 
“It does look great,” he whispered, Charlotte not sure whether to accept the compliment because she could detect the faintest amusement in his voice. “But I’ve seen better.” 
However, before she could respond, she understood why he looked amused. She took a step forward just as he moved and pushed the cake and its holder, a glass cake stand Charlotte received from her grandmother, to the floor. She gasped as the holder shattered into a million pieces and the cake splattered across their pristine white floors. 
She glanced from the newly made mess on the floor to his eyes, the menacing pair daring her to say a word or cry. She forced the tears that sprang to her eyes to stay where they were as the other men came rushing to the kitchen at the sound. 
“Damn. What happened?” 
One short glance at Shaun and she knew what lie she was to tell. “O-Oh I… um… just tripped while I was carrying it and d-dropped it. Y-You know h-how clumsy I-I am… Sorry guys… sorry, baby,” she offered, turning to Shaun. And even though she had not done a single thing wrong, she found that her apology to him was genuine. Her eyes repeated that apology as he stared at her, apologizing for not being what he wanted, for not trying hard enough, for ruining his special day. He had a way of making her mind believe she was the guilty party even when she knew in her soul she had done nothing wrong. 
“It’s ok, babe. I know you tried your best.” He gently kissed her on the top of the head, Charlotte bowing her head and caving in softly. “You know what fellas, let’s call it a night. Wanna spend some time with my lady,” he kissed her on the cheek this time, Charlotte hoping none of them could see how her whole frame trembled beneath the seemingly sweet gesture and in his embrace. 
His friends snickered and immediately gathered their stuff. She knew they merely figured they were being kicked out so they could fuck. Oh how she wished they could see it, see her terror, or that she had the confidence to scream at them to save her. But he had stomped all of that out of her. No voice to ask for someone else to help her and no energy to save herself. Besides, she knew it was useless. With everyone else, he hid the beast so well and so perfectly that they would never see the truth. Sometimes she, even still, fell for the facade that hid the monster so how could she expect anything else from them? 
When she heard the door finally click closed, she braced herself. For what? She did not know. Part of her yearned for the days when it was a mere slap across the face every couple of weeks. Now, he avoided her face as it caused too many questions. However, what he could not do to her face, he seems to desire to make up for it everywhere else. 
“Get on your knees,” he demanded when he returned to the kitchen, Charlotte still paralyzed in the same spot he left her. Charlotte’s eyes fell on the broken glass and cake, which made her hesitate for a millisecond, a millisecond she would quickly regret. 
“You are really stupid, you know that?” He shook his head before he backhanded her, her body falling into their table. He quickly followed it with two punches to her abdomen that forced her to her knees. He kicked her over and over again, even though she was down where he wanted her, Charlotte screaming and begging him to stop as she felt several of her ribs crack.
He grabbed her by her hair, using his fist to create a ponytail to force her upright despite the pain. 
“See we gotta have a long lesson tonight. When I tell you to do something, you fuckin’ do it. Got it?”
She nodded fervently, her body unable to determine what pain to focus on first: The pulling in her scalp, the sting on her cheek, the soreness already spreading through her stomach, the agony of every breath, or the shards of glass she could feel breaking her skin on her knees and chins. 
“I-I’m s-sorry, I’m sorry” she strained to offer. “I-I’ll m-make it… up t-to you.” 
However, he did not release her, Charlotte’s heart sinking as she watched his hands go to unbutton his pants. Her whimpers and pleas for a reprieve went unanswered as he forced himself down her throat. 
She just pretended she was elsewhere as he made her to service him, forcing her panic to calm enough to focus on other things. She thought about the director’s notes from rehearsal today, she thought about her schedule for tomorrow and where she could fit in a quick run to an urgent care, she thought about what lie she would tell to explain the bruises that she most certainly could not hide in her character’s revealing costumes. She thought only of actions, tangible actions she could take. Not her fear, not her panic, not her despair. Actions. That seemed to be the only thing that worked when he hurt her. Thinking of the things she needed to do to keep the one thing in her life that brought her any joy was the only way to endure it. After all, no was not a word he accepted in any regard, but particularly not in the bedroom. 
When he was done, he released her hair, causing her to collapse into the mess on the floor, her coughing and sobbing filling the kitchen.
“Clean this up, bitch. The floor better be spotless when I get back.” 
She sat there for a moment as he retreated, her head buried in her hands as she cried. The agony of every sob was only amplified by the pain radiating through her ribs. Her hands shook violently as she tried to clean, accidentally cutting herself over and over on shards of glass she could not see through her own tears.  
She had gotten the floor fairly clean before she noticed a steady drip of crimson staining the floor. She glanced down to see a rather deep cut from the glass on her leg, her blood falling from it. She immediately looked over her legs, both of them and her hands smudged in her own blood. She let in a sharp breath, which quickly turned to pants of panic as she fell forward to the floor. 
It was not that she had not seen her own blood before but the sight felt like reality hitting her like a train. This would be her life… for the rest of her life. Day after day of killing herself to be perfect for him, to do every action by the letter of his law, only to end up in the same spot: broken beneath him. He’d never stop, he’d never change, and she’d never be perfect enough. Because he didn’t want her to be. He wanted her to be this broken, bleeding shell of a woman until he grew tired of her. 
And that reality, the first time she forced herself to contend with the prospect of such a bleak future, made her insides twist in agony, adding to the pain she already felt. Pain… that was it for her. That was all she had known and would know: pain. She could hold tight to frivolous dreams like being the lead in a show but none of it even mattered. Her life was just one series of blows after another. He had taken everything else, it would not be long before he took that last sliver of light in her life with him. 
“Charlotte! Charlotte, baby…” 
She moaned into the floor, shaking her head, which she had buried into her arm on the floor. She was in too much pain, everything ached and hurt and she would not survive another thing. She knew it would only make it worse, more painful but she resisted, resisted his touch as he turned her over and straddled her. 
“No! NO! Let me go, let me go!” She pushed and fought against him, using her last bit of energy to buck his body off of hers even as he pinned her hands to the ground, which felt softer and like she was sinking into it… 
“Charlotte! Els! It’s just me! Babe! Wake up!” 
Michael’s calls were frantic as he straddled her out of control limbs to subdue her. His eyes filled with unshed tears and trepidation as he tried to force her out of whatever nightmare had its grips on her mind. 
However, he quickly realized grabbing her only amplified the issue, her erratic movements to escape his touch only intensifying as he tried to help her. However, he was terrified to let her go, terrified she would accidentally hurt herself or topple over the side of the bed. 
This was not the first night Charlotte had woken him up with nightmares lately. Every night for the last week in fact. Most were soft whimpers and pleas that ended fairly quickly. He would inquire about them the next morning but she never seemed to remember what plagued her. However, tonight, when he woke up to those whimpers, it was far worse. It took mere minutes for them to turn into all out screams and pleas for mercy to an unknown assailant. 
Her eyes were open but utterly unseeing, filled with pain and terror he wished he had never seen on her. Her body was active but her mind was still trapped in whatever hellscape her subconscious conjured. 
“P-Please,” she whimpered. “D-don’t… I-I c-can’t… t-take a-any… m-more. Please. I-I’ll be b-better, I-I pr-promise.” 
Her pleas to a person who was not there sent splinters through his soul, he wished he could do more to help her but he was utterly helpless. Even as she begged, her body continued fighting him, unaware that he was not her enemy. 
“Els… love. H-hey, it’s me… it’s Bakari. It’s Bakari… y-you're safe, you're safe. Wake up for me,” he opted to match her tone, soft whispers that conveyed all of the love he held for her, hoping that would infiltrate the terror that whipped her into this frenzy. 
He loosened his grip around her wrists and settled next to her as her body relaxed, his words and gentle touch seeping through slowly but surely. He kept one hand on her, loose but gentle as he caressed the inside of her wrist. He just had to wait for her mind to catch up, to realize the threat she felt was fiction, not reality. 
“B-Bakari…” she whispered, his name coming out as a sob of relief. She sobbed as she realized where she was, Shaun was gone and her boyfriend sat beside her, his face in utter shock. She threw herself into his arms and cried into the nap of his neck. The visions from her nightmare, no not a nightmare she realized. A memory, one she had buried so deep, she had almost forgotten it. She glanced down at her hand, her normal one replaced with a vision of her dirty bloodied one from that night. 
She could not control it as she felt her stomach immediately turn. She pulled herself away from Michael and leaned over the bed and retched. She groaned in pain as she heaved and flinched as Michael went to touch her back to comfort her.
“I-I’m sorry,” she kept repeating in the darkness as she realized what she had done, how she had embarrassed herself in front of him. 
“Don’t apologize, love. Can you stand?” 
She nodded faintly. 
“Ok,” he helped her out of the bed on his side and led her to the bathroom. He sat her on the closed toilet, Charlotte’s eyes still a bit distant and clouded, though he knew she could hear him. He crouched down to be eye-level with her, his fingers whisking away the tears that continued to stream down her face. His tone was gentle as if he were talking to someone made of glass, anything other than a soft word would cause her to shatter into a million pieces.
 “You ok for a few minutes? I’ll clean up as best I can out there while you shower and brush your teeth. And I’ll get the housekeepers here tomorrow. We can sleep in the other room for the rest of the night.” 
She nodded, squeezing his hand before he left her. She did not move for a few moments, she just sat there, in shock. She had never experienced a nightmare quite like that before. She hated the wreckage he was still able to create in her life, how one glance had shredded through her subconscious. 
She knew her house of cards was close to toppling, her web of lies would unravel. Michael was perceptive, noticed every change in her behavior. He would wait until the morning because he knew she was too fragile right them but then he would demand answers. And she did not know if he would accept “I don’t remember” this time. 
When she finished, Michael was waiting for her with her favorite tea, a sweatshirt, and underwear. He helped her get dressed and led her to the couch. 
“Wanna j-just crash on the couch so you can watch a bit of tv to calm down?”
She nodded quietly. He helped her snuggle up in her favorite thick blanket and rest with her head in his lap. His fingers gently massaged her scalp through her scarf. He could still feel her body tensing beneath him, none of her usual relaxation methods working to ease whatever plagued her. 
“What’s wrong, Els? You’ve had a lot of nightmares but that one was… You sure you’re gonna be ok when I go to LA tomorrow? I can  reschedule or come back early? Maybe you can ask Chris for a day off.” 
“Y-yea, that’s it. I promise,” she whispered, clenching her eyes shut. “And no, you’re staying an extra couple days to see your family. You should do that.” She forced herself up and kissed him softly. “I’m ok, really. I t-think j-just the longer I’m back here, the more old shit it brings up. Besides, we only have two shows before opening night… two more days. Chris would k-kill me if I miss one. It was j-just a dumb flashback. I’m ok. G-get on your flight tomorrow, I'll keep you updated and I'll be fine."
He nodded and she fell back onto his lap. She immediately felt racked with guilt. Of course he believed her, she had never given him a reason to distrust her until now. She closed her eyes and tried to force herself to sleep as Michael’s soothing hands comforted her. But her inability to sleep this time had little to do with fear and a lot to do with her own guilt. 
These nightmares were her punishment for lying, she knew that. All of the stress and panic she was hiding just manifested in her dreams, but amplified.
It’s for a good reason, it's for a good reason, she reminded herself. Though, she could not dismiss the nagging concern that when this house of lies finally fell, Michael would certainly not see it that way. 
***
“So are you gonna miss having Michael there tomorrow night?” Chris asked as they watched everyone mingle at the cocktail hour one of the producers hosted. Tomorrow was the big day and everyone was excited and on edge, there was no inbetween. 
She shrugged. “A bit. But he sent the most gorgeous flowers and got a massage for Sunday morning. He’ll be back mid next week and already bought a ticket to see it again when he’s back. I told him he’s gonna get tired of it.”
“He definitely will. A month in and Jason,” he gestured to his partner who was chatting across the room, “Barely wants to hear a note from one of my shows ever again. Let alone see it for the 100th time. Anyway, cheers,” they clinked their champagne flutes against each other’s. “Tomorrow’s your big night. You're gonna be a star once the reviews hit and this is all said and done."
Charlotte bowed her head. “All thanks to you.”
He shrugged. “I just know talent when I see it. Oh shoot. Isaac and his financial guy just got here. I should go say hi. Be right back.” He squeezed Charlotte’s arm before disappearing into the crowd, her eyes following him until they landed on Shaun and Isaac. Shaun, thankfully, did not notice her yet. But she did not linger long in the spot to give him the opportunity.
She quickly turned and moved through the crowd, making conversation with other investors and actors. It was a decent enough crowd that she could avoid him artfully. She and Shaun did a skillful dance the entire night. Every time he got too close, she spun away or Malcolm or Vanessa swooped in and artfully redirected his attention. It was dizzying but by the time she left to head downstairs to her car, she thought she had made it through another Shaun sighting without incident. And to think, she was going to tuck her tail between her legs and run home. 
However, she should have known one cardinal rule: luck always runs out eventually.
“You’ve been avoiding me.” Her steps down the hallway halted as she worked to slide on her coat. He was perched against the elevator as if he had been waiting for her.
She glanced around, the hallway was a ghost town as everyone else was still partying and having a good time. She could faintly hear Chris captivating the entire room with a third story of the night. His second one was Charlotte’s cue that it was time to head home. She had tried to sneak out unnoticed but now he blocked her path down to her car.
She studied him for a moment, her eyes trailing over his body from head to toe. He was still as handsome and captivating as she remembered, his brown skin was flawless, his suit reeked of wealth and high-quality tailoring. His appearance had not changed one bit. However, whatever captivated her about him the first time was long gone. She had been the moth to his flame, he drew her in effortlessly back then. But now, she only saw the facade for what it was: a mask to hide who he really was. She could not believe she fell for it the first time.
His stature remained tall and wide, making her feel physically powerless and inferior with her shorter stature. It was David and Goliath reincarnated but she had no rock and slingshot to save her. He could still squash her like a little bug and he knew it. Her confidence wilted like a flower with no water with every passing second underneath his glare. She hated the effect he still had on her, how her soul and bones seemed to recognize him and fall back into those patterns to protect herself. However, she remembered her mantra, she was fighting back. No more cowering, even if her fear wafted off of her like she was prey and he was her predator. 
“It's good to have you back, baby. Miss me?” 
“I-I…” her voice faltered for a moment before she drew herself to full height. It did little but she felt more assured when she answered him. “No. And I’m not your baby. I left you and I moved on. W-what are you even doing here?” 
She hoped her voice sounded more confident to him than it did against her own ears. She sounded like a helpless child to stand up to their bigger and stronger bully.
He smiled, still that menacing smirk that sent chills down her spine. He circled her as he spoke, a hawk surveying its dinner. 
“I manage all of Isaac’s investments. He was one of my rivals’ clients but when I found out his big investments were in Broadway… It was the fuckin’ long game, I’ll admit,” he reasoned. “But I figured I could get two things I wanted. I manage his portfolio, make recommendations, and I could keep my eye out for the Charlotte Bennett’s epic return. Worst case scenario, Issac makes a lot of money, so I make a shit ton of money. And best case scenario, I’m in the perfect position to see my favorite girl again. You know when I read that you were gonna be in this show, it wasn’t even a hard sell. As soon as I mentioned it, he said ‘every show Chris writes turns to money in my pocket.” He stopped in front of her, his finger grazing her cheek. His eyes seemed to light up as he watched her flinch beneath it, despite how hard she tried not to. 
“How’d you even know I’d be in the show? I don’t remember you having a love for Broadway.” 
“Oh I don’t give a fuck about any of this,” he waved his hand. “But I do still care about you. And like any good investor, I like to keep a close eye on my best investments. And you were my greatest one… so much time and energy I put into you. I know you better than you know yourself. Didn’t know what show or when, but this was always your dream. People leave but they always come back home eventually. It just required patience and time. You surprised me though… I’d thought you’d make me wait a lot longer than two & a half years.” 
She tried to school her breathing. At this point, she would consider winning this fight to be ensuring he did not see the terror that raged beneath the surface. When she made this choice to say, she had forgotten what this part felt like. To feel his simmering anger up close, to feel primal fear like this. She now remembered why she had considered running in the first place. 
With every step he took toward her, Charlotte took one step back until he had her pressed against the wall. 
“I missed you so much,” he whispered, one arm wrapping around her waist to pull her close while the other inched up her thigh beneath her dress. She wanted to flinch, disgusted at how his hands felt against her skin. “Did you miss me?” 
She shook her head vehemently, one arm pushing all of her weight into his chest to push him off while the other pushed off his wandering hand. She hated that he still felt entitled to her body and her. Her mind drifted back to Michael and one of the boxing moves he showed her when someone had you pressed against the ropes. She did not even give it a second thought as she jabbed her shoulder and entire weight into it and shoved him off of her. 
She quickly moved from the wall and faced him. She knew she was only able to do that because she caught him off guard, the surprise in his face told her that much. 
They don’t expect you to fight, Malcolm’s words came back to her. She would have to thank him again for that tidbit. 
But she was merely happy to get his disgusting hands off of her, that was enough for now. She also made a mental note to thank Michael one day for teaching her that move before she turned her attention back to him. That one maneuver infused her with a new spark of confidence. She was not the same woman, she had grown and moved on and she would not be so easily intimidated ever again. 
She squared her shoulders and stared at him as he blocked her way out.
“Move, Shaun. I don’t miss you and I never want to see or speak to you again. Y-You don’t get to waltz in here after years and act like you own me. Whatever game you’re playing, enjoy playing it alone. We’re done. Let me go,” she demanded, her voice sounding as strong as it had been since she spotted him earlier. “Now.” 
However, Shaun seemed unperturbed by her change in demeanor and stronger voice. He merely laughed at her show of strength. 
“Let you go? After I spent years turning you into the perfect woman? And don’t kid yourself, Charlie. That woman is still in there, underneath this bullshit facade you show to the world. You’re mine, Charlie. My perfect girl. You can move across the country, date other people… and you’ll still always be mine.” 
Charlotte shook her head vehemently. “I-I am not yours! I don’t want you, Shaun. I’m in love with someone else. And he…” she sighed. “He doesn’t hurt me like you did, he doesn’t scare me, or talk down to me. He loves me. I didn’t come back for you. I came back to do this show and to start building a life with him. That’s it. There is no us ever again.” 
She cowered slightly as she saw anger flash across his eyes. 
“Oh you think you’re better than me now?” 
“I think… I know I deserve better than you. And that I don’t love you… and that you can never hurt me like you did again.”
She barely had time to get the last word out before she doubled over as he threw a jab at her ribs. She immediately crumpled to the ground in shock, pain radiating through her abdomen. He followed it up with a kick to the same area that made tears spring to her eyes. It took everything to keep from screaming, she knew everything else was drowned out by the loud music of the party down the hall. It was quick, over before she even had the chance to attempt to defend herself. All she could do was whimper as she tried to push herself onto all fours, one hand immediately shielding her side from another kick.
“D-don’t, don’t…” she pleaded, her apologies flowing with each heaving breath. “I-I’m s-sorry, I’m sorry.” 
He crouched down low beside her. “There she is,” he beamed. “The real Charlotte. It seems like you forgot who the fuck has power here. Cause it sure as hell ain’t you or that nigga you with. You breathe because I allow it, you’ll get up there and sing that bullshit every night because I let you. You lived carefree in LA because I allowed it. You don’t deserve shit. Still the worthless whore I remember. Don’t let the fans in there fool you, Charlie. You’re still nothing without me. Understand?”
When she didn’t immediately answer, he gripped her face tightly, forcing her eyes to him. 
“I said, do you fuckin’ understand?” 
“I-I u-understand.” 
He immediately let her go, her face falling down as tears stained her cheeks.  
“Get up,” his voice was so filled with disgust, she almost flinched again. “You don’t want people to see you like this, do you?” 
She did not even watch as he sauntered back to the party, leaving Charlotte alone and broken on the floor. She sat there for a moment before she forced herself to her feet and dusted herself off. She pressed her hands into her eyes and wiped away her tears. 
She gingerly tested her range of motion, a sharp exhale escaping her. It hurt when she moved but it wasn’t unbearable. If she could dance through broken ribs, she could certainly get through bruises. But she knew there would be no way to hide the bruise that would form from Michael when he returned from LA. But she decided that was a problem for later. She would just have to spin a larger web.
Charlotte quickly rushed into the elevator to ensure no one saw her. When she slid into her car, she demanded their driver drive around the city for 20 minutes before he took her home. She anxiously looked over her shoulder every 30 seconds as if she could pick Shaun out of the sea of cars behind her while she held back tears. 
When she finally made it up to her apartment, she did not even change her clothes. She crawled into a ball on the couch and turned on the tv. She had finally dozed off when her phone rang. 
“H-Hey babe,” she whispered as she answered Bakari’s FaceTime.
“Oh, I’m sorry love. I figured you were still out at that event. You ok?” 
She smiled and nodded. “Y-Yea, yea. I j-just wasn’t feelin’ great at the party. Long day a-and t-too much to drink I think. Stressing for tomorrow. I didn’t even take off my make up,” she chuckled. “Tell me all about your first couple meetings while I get ready for bed.” She pushed the conversation back to him, hoping she had said enough to ease any concerns he had. 
Michael did not keep her on the phone long as he could tell she was exhausted. But he did share highlights from his meetings and screen test with Chadwick, gushing - in the most manly way possible - about how excited he was to work alongside Chadwick and a couple of the other actors who were there. There was another day of reading and screen tests with a couple other cast members the next day but it seemed as if everyone had loved him.  Though she was tired, his words were a breath of fresh air, the thing she needed to tip the scales of this day back in the right direction. 
“I knew it. I’m so happy for you, love. The last couple will go great. Sounds like they’re just a formality?”
“Basically. Team’s gotta talk numbers but I think it’s a done deal. Ryan said the role is mine and he ain’t auditioning anybody else.” 
She mustered up as much energy as she could to let out a couple of enthusiastic cheers. 
“Good. Well I’ll call you tomorrow to tell you how opening night goes. Enjoy the time with the fam and we’ll celebrate when you get back?” 
“Sounds good. See you on Wednesday, love. Get some rest. You sure you’re alright?”
“Y-Yea,” her voice cracked as the weight of the day and all her lies got to her. She so desperately wanted to fall and break down and sob. But she couldn’t. And she knew if she lingered under his stare, he would push. And one more push and she would crumble. “Love you, bye.” She said quickly before hanging up the phone. 
She clenched her phone in her hand angrily and banged it on the counter, a slight sob escaping her. 
She slid out of her dress and curled up in one of Michael’s sweatshirts before returning to the couch. Her eyes stayed trained on the tv all night, not falling asleep until the wee hours of the morning. 
Thousands of miles away, Michael could not relax either. He was in bed and could not stop thinking about Charlotte. 
Something was not right. He searched social media and the news to see if something had gone wrong at the last night of previews but all was quiet and the few posts he saw were extremely positive. He felt like a stalker but he checked all of her co-stars' social media accounts, studying every picture and video they posted , studying the rare glimpses of Charlotte in backgrounds. And still nothing. She looked tired but otherwise happy and joyful like he left her. In every photo he could find, she was smiling and laughing and clearly joking around. 
After staring at the wall for an extra hour, he remembered that he had another option to get answers that did not involve Charlotte at all. 
He scrolled through his contacts until he found Rob’s number. His fingers drummed against the steering wheel while the phone rang. 
“Mr. Jordan, what can I do for you?” The man sounded groggy as if he had been asleep. 
“Hey Rob. Sorry for waking you up. But you took Charlotte home tonight from the party right?” 
“Yes sir, about 3 hours ago… around 1:30 a.m.” 
Michael nodded. “Did she seem ok to you? Was she feeling alright or looked upset or hurt in any way?” 
A distinct and pregnant pause filled the phone, a pause that filled him with dread, his protective side immediately kicked into overdrive. 
“Rob. What happened?” 
The older man sighed. “I don’t know, sir. And I mean that. When I dropped her off at the party around 11:30, she seemed just fine. Tired as she had been all day but nothing seemed out of the ordinary. She texted me to meet her downstairs at 12:45, which was a bit earlier than she told me to come back. She came down and she seemed frazzled and upset. She had me drive around the city for 20 minutes before she told me to head home. She kept looking out the back window like someone was following her but she wouldn’t say what the issue was.” 
“Was someone following you?” 
“No, not that I could tell.” 
“Was she hurt?” 
“This is purely speculation, sir. But she did sound like she was in pain when she got in and out of the car. I asked if she needed help or was alright and she told me she was fine. I wish I knew more.” 
“No, no. That’s plenty. What time does she have to be at the theater tomorrow night?” 
“Around 3, sir. Curtains open at 7:30 and then she said the after party is nearby at midnight.”  
“Good. I’ll send you the details but plan to pick me up sometime tomorrow afternoon after you drop her off. I’m getting on the first flight I can back to New York.” 
“Yes sir.” 
“And Rob, don’t mention this to her. If anything happens tomorrow when you pick her up, let me know.”
“Yes sir.” 
Michael sighed and thudded his head back onto his headboard. He turned over the last couple weeks in his head and realized that tonight or her nightmare were not the first instance of odd behavior. The recent increase in her nightmares, the lack of sleep, the overall jumpiness she seemed to have. Something was going on, something more than just nervousness about performing. And whatever it was, it ended tomorrow. He would make sure of it.
Tag List: @certifiedlesbianbaddie @bangtanxmegan @reelwriter19 @prettyisasprettydoes1306 @hi888888sworld @msniaimani @destinio1 @lynaye1993 @chaoticevilbakugo @blackerthings @pipsqueak-98 @miyuhpapayuh
***
A/N: Now… before everyone gets mad at me lol, I just want to assure everyone that this is a love story! Happy endings are coming lol we just gotta get through some muck first. Also what do you think of Charlie's decision to keep this all secret from Michael? Definitely is weighing on her heavily. How do you think that'll affect their relationship long-term? Michael is on his way back to his girl (I love how he immediately knew something wasn't right) andddd how do y'all think he's gonna react to what he sees?
Thanks for reading! Drop a comment and let me know what you think or if you want to be tagged!
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rinovarka · 3 years
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Delayed update (I forgot XD), but the rest of the chibis! Days 21-28
Day 21-Glit + Floor Piano Mat
Glit jamming on a simplified giant piano! Glit comes from the....It Shall Not Be Named Transformers Series that we all collectively Do Not Percieve, and is one of few Decepticon medics. I think its funny bc like, well, I think cons would need more medics than Autobots TBH but I imagine the burn out rate is high lol. I like the concept of Glit a lil minicon, being a caring medic who treats any bot or con, to no care of faction. Idk if it was just fanon or not but I like the idea of Glit having a meme-y personality. I also just like minicon/bots in general aksksksks
Day 22-G1 Jazz + Saxophone
G1 Jazz with a Saxophone! 🎷 🎷 🎷 Yea believe it or not it did not cross my mind to actually.....have Jazz in my December daily draw, despite his name being a music genre and being known for music sksksksksks. I literally did not think of the main music peeps at all actually!
Day 23-G1 Wheeljack + Zeusaphone
Wheeljack Wednesday with G1 Wheeljack weilding the power of a zeusaphone! Truly the only mech I WOULD trust with two giant sets of electrical poles that zap electric currents to make music, for sure 😌👍.
Day 24-RID2015 Thunderhoof + Jingle Bells
SO RiD 2015...anyone else like, notice how most of the Decepticons are like, either robot anthros or purposely animalesque in appearance?? Like they turn into vehicles but here, have smooth voice wolf robot furry and just a crab?? XD
Because it was SO festive XD. Top favs I can recall being Thunderhoof, Steeljaw, Groundpounder, Underbite, Scowl, and Vertebreak. I remember when I was new to the fandom, lots of people talked about this show, and not in a kind way. Mainly due to how is the sequel show to TFP, and differs heavily to say the least!
Day 25-G1 Cliffjumper + Tambourine
G1 Cliffjumper with a tambourine who just out to give good vibes! Personally I was never a fan of making Cliffjumper into a joke, comparing him to a Bumblebee knock off or whatever, I dont think they resemble another at all??  Like if we are going to talk about characters looking similar,, Seekers in most series are literal recolors of the same model, yet we know and treat them as different characters! Bumblebee and Cliffjumper have different colors and body features and different personalities so why is it so hahah funny to say Cliff is just knockoff Bumblebee?????
Day 26-G1 Tracks + Guiro
Tracks with el güiro! Im,,,love Tracks and Raoul. Raoul and his dancing crew are humans I think should make a comeback in a TF series. Raoul being a snarky guy trying to make ends meet in any way possible, and Tracks being this super posh, conceited guy who has a punchable voice, you see...the c o n t r a s t 
Day 27-MTMTE Sunder + Waterphone
Sunder with a waterphone! Please, give it a listen! While you are there, look up the Apprension Engine! Look them up at midnight after a scary movie, eases all fears :^)
Day 28-Shrapnel + Rindik
G1 Shrapnel with a rindik! So Shrapnel, Kickback, and Bombshell are just cons who crashed into Bali, probably watched from a distance as humanity developed and whatever. Didnt really care too much, just chilling in the trees or their lil cave, just eating, and with deforestation and all, then eating the human's crops and being awaken by fishers and musicians. Shrapnel doesn't know w h y humans are so into banging things and making loud noises, but honestly? As long as they keep growing food, he and his crew don't really care, probably.
Link to other Chibis 1-5! , 11-15,  29-31
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imnotwolverine · 4 years
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The Accidental Family - I am..WHAT?!
Henry Cavill x OFC Phoebe (Bee) 
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Warnings: mentions of smut, strong language, unplanned pregnancy, sad fluff
Word count: 2.414
Author’s note: OKAY..one more to finish the year. I’m writing this while frying oliebollen (Dutch dough balls we eat during festivities) and my fingers are all sticky and sweet, but hey; I can’t leave you readers hanging on the last day of this miserable year! Kisses 😘
(Link to my Masterlist)
--
Phoebe was done with it all. Done with this week; done with the slump that was her life right now. She just worked through a week with three over-time shifts at the hospital, some annoyances with her new IUD and Leon. Fucking-fucktard Leon. 
But tonight she was going to be a big girl and suck it up, because heck; she was a good friend and tonight was Megan’s night. After long years of hard toil and shitty side-jobs, Megan had MADE it. She had gotten her first serious acting gig and tonight was the premiere, to which Phoebe would be her +1. 
Single girls unite. 
Sighing, Phoebe leaned into her make-up mirror, applying a coat of lipgloss to her pursed lips, heavy eyelashes fluttering. She never wore this much make-up, but it seemed like a thing you did when you went to such a fancy party. An A-lister party. Would Meryl Streep be there? She always had wanted to meet Meryl Streep. 
Smacking her lips to feel the stickiness of her lipgloss - why did people like wearing this crap? -, she moved out to the hall of her small apartment where she heard the intercom buzz. Alright. Showtime. 
‘Coming!’ She called to nobody in particular, hastily looking over the rows of shoes that were messily stacked by her door. Heels - heels - heels. And that scarf. Leon’s scarf. “Accidentally” left behind after he had come over to finally pick up the last of his things. She couldn’t stand the sight of it, and if it were a “good girl thing” to do, she’d shove it down the trash right now - like the trash he was. Cheater.
*tringgg* 
Hurry! -- Okay, shoes! Purple, brown, practical, no - no - no.. And then her eye fell on the perhaps a bit painful, but very much sexy heels she had once bought to wear for her 6th anniversary with Leon. Fuck-Me-Pumps. With silvery diamond straps and all. He hadn’t given two damns about them, about her dreams she had tried to talk about during that dinner - kids - but then again, Phoebe learned a year later why that was; CHEATER. 
‘Please bring me luck, babies.’ Phoebe mumbled, picking up the intercom that buzzed again. ‘Just putting on my shoes. Down in a minute.’ 
‘Alright m’am.’ A deep voice responded politely. 
Was that the driver? It must be the driver! They had a driver?! OH MEGAN, YOU! 
Excitement started to bubble in Phoebe’s tired bones as she realised that perhaps for tonight, things could be fun - painful shoes and all. 
Show-time. 
--
The water boiler gurgled lazily on the countertop, two pairs of eyes staring down at it, willing it to go faster. 
‘You didn’t respond to my text.’ Henry tried to keep a casual tone, but even with all his acting experience, the hurt was evident as his blue eyes swiftly moved over to Phoebe, who that had just knocked on his door after 3 months of radio silence. 
‘Yea...’ Phoebe cleared her throat and awkwardly leaned into the opposite kitchen counter Henry was leaning into. The tension was tangible and for a moment she scolded herself for pushing Megan to find out Henry’s address. 
‘..some..stuff happened.’ 
‘Is this the point where you’re going to tell me you’re married and your husband found out?’ 
Phoebe’s eyes widened and a chuckle escaped her lips, making Henry frown. ‘That might have just made all this a bit easier. But eh..no. I ..’ 
--
‘FEEEEBBsss where WEREEEE youu. Oh my god. Have you met..’ Phoebe could barely manage to stay balanced on her high heels as Megan’s hand dragged her away from the toilets - away from him - and onto one of the far corners of the crowded room where some mildly creepy man was waving at Megan. Megan waved back, but Phoebe could only focus on the burst of white camera flashes behind her, her eyes wishing to look if he followed. 
But Megan’s grip was tight and Phoebe was perhaps three shot glasses too drunk to stay on her feet AND look over her shoulder - the deep pink blush on her cheeks betraying that something was going on. 
‘..so I had this super fun chat with Michael. You know Michael right? I mean he was crazyyy excited about..Phoebe? Earth to Phoebe!’ Megan’s neatly manicured nail prodded into Phoebe’s silvery dress, awakening the blond woman from her over-shoulder stare when they finally had halted. 
‘Wh-what? Hi! Sorry. Eh..’ Instantly the deep pink worsened on Phoebe’s cheeks as Megan shot her one unbelieving wild eyed stare - she knew. Oh fuck, she knew. 
‘You know what - if you’d excuse us for a moment.’ Megan smiled charmingly at the old man that was checking her out for all the wrong reasons. 
Again Megan’s hand pulled on her arm, but this time they travelled less far, walking out to a more quiet area guarded by some heavy red curtains which offered a walkway for the staff who much resembled an army of tuxedo clad ants moving large trays of fizz around. 
‘You are 50 shades of red, hun.’ Megan chuckled, wiping some mildly smudged lipgloss from Phoebe’s chin. 
‘Oh, woops.’ Phoebe quickly mimicked the wipe on her chin, but the sticky residue was already gone - though other sticky residue on some other lips were most definitely still there. 
Shit, she had to get cleaned up fast. She wasn’t even wearing any PANTIES. DAMMIT. Oh my...how..why..Wobbling dangerously on her heels again, Phoebe lurched for one of the walls, a sudden wave of nausea coming over her as her red cheeks turned bitter green.
‘Awh shit Feebs. You OK? Eh..Ehhhhh...’ Nervously Megan looked around the stretch of the hallway, black and white tuxedos cruising deftly around with the patterns of a well-practised champagne carrying dance. 
‘Pfff...’ Phoebe tried to breath in deeply, inhaling whatever air she could muster in her suddenly claustrophobically tight lungs. Oh what did she do?!!! OH NO. Oh Christ. Good girls don’t shag in toilet stalls. Good girls don’t... ‘Pff - pff -pff’ With short little puffs she let out the air, but the nausea didn’t fade. How did pregnant women do that? Damn. 
‘I gotta go home.’ 
‘Yea-yea. Let me fix you a cab.’ Megan clipped her fingers and in a few minutes Phoebe was loaded into a cab, away from the bustling bubble of Hollywood A-listers and hot shots. 
The fairytale, was over. 
--
‘I got scared.’ 
‘Of me?’ Henry’s face pulled into one of agony, making him look even more disheveled with his wild curls, crumpled white shirt - which looked much too good on his large chest - and loose hanging grey sweatpants. 
‘No. I mean. Eh. Well. I lost my phone and..I called..and..someone picked up.’ 
‘Lea? Miranda? What someone?’ Henry stepped a little closer as the water cooker started to come to a slow boil. 
‘I don’t know. I -- They said they never heard of me, so I explained what..happened - oh fuck I shouldn’t have..I...pfffff. I panicked.’ A heavy blush crept over her cheeks as she nervously eyed the water boiler, the little lever moving back to “off” as the water danced in a heavy boil within.
‘Gr-green tea? English tea? Mint? I got some..’ Henry’s voice trailed off.
Phoebe shrugged and brushed a hand over her cheek, willing herself to stop blushing as the large stranger of a man brushed passed her to reach for the tea bags that were located just beside her head. 
‘Oh sorry.’ She quickly tried to get away, but Henry could only grin. 
‘It’s not funny, Cavill.’ Phoebe pouted shyly. 
‘Well you stood me up. I’m allowed to..smile, no?’ 
Phoebe opened her mouth to say something. Perhaps ask for forgiveness, or further her explanation to why she chickened out to trying again - and how she had even gotten his address. But no words came and so she just watched as Henry turned back to the task of making tea, bunching a few mint leaves in the two grey mugs that were settled on the smooth grey kitchen counter. 
This man sure liked his greys. 
‘I eh..actually ..had to tell you something.’ 
Even Phoebe herself wasn’t prepared for the words that had just escaped her lips, but there they were, earning a surprised quirk of Henry’s eyebrow. 
‘You don’t say.’ His lip curled into another cheeky grin and Phoebe couldn’t help but roll her eyes at him. Henry chuckled and hinted in the direction of the kitchen table. ‘Let’s sit.’ 
-- And that was a very good idea -- 
--
‘Meg..oh I’m in deep shit.’ Phoebe paced her small hallway as she waited for her friend’s voice to soothe her stomach fluttering nerves, her new smartphone clutched tightly in her hand. 
‘Oh- oh- wait a sec. Baby..yea..mommy is gonna be righttt there. Just a moment okay?’ A short pause followed and then Megan finally answered. ‘HEYY booo. What’s cooking goodlookin’?’ 
‘A baby, that’s what.’ 
‘W-what?’ 
--
Why didn’t he say anything? Phoebe nervously fingered the ear of her mug, waiting for Henry to give any kind of response to what she had just explained, and for the slightest moment she considered fleeing again - like she had numerous times when she tried to find the courage and call him, text him - anything. But that just hadn’t sat right, felt right. And then for long weeks she just pushed the reality of it all away. How could she be pregnant?! HOW?! 
The new IUD, that’s how. But, Henry had used protection; how much bad luck could one have?! So much for accidents that happen in cramped little bathroom stalls. 
Finally Henry made a noise, but it was more like a surprised squeak, then any normal sound a man his size would make. 
‘I’m sorry.’ Phoebe lowered her eyes a little more, taking it up as a; yea, this is not cool, girlfriend.
No, scratch that - she was not even his girlfriend. Ha! They were strangers for fuck’s sake. 
‘O-okay.’ Henry inhaled deeply and nodded, brushing a hand over the head of his dog, who was pushing a curious nose into his lap. ‘Okay. Wow.’ 
‘Yea..’ Phoebe swallowed thickly. ‘I..I’m keeping it either way. But..I thought..’ Her fingers had apparently curled around the mug so fiercely that it right about screamed as its small ear broke off. ‘OH FUCK.’ Her eyes widened as her lips turned into a shocked little “o”. 
Henry laughed. ‘Well, we better get new mugs before that baby is born.’ 
Was he being sarcastic? Phoebe felt like she was close to tears as the man before her cracked out the mug joke. Oh, why did she always ruin things?! 
‘Oh don’t cry. Please don’t cry. It’s just a mug.’ Henry’s smile turned into a pained lip bite as he saw the silvery tears rim Phoebe’s eyes. But Phoebe couldn’t help it, her lower lip already shivering as she looked down at the broken little tea ear in her hand. 
‘I’m sorry..’ She whimpered pathetically, the first tears already beading down her cheek before Henry could push away his chair and squat down beside her. 
‘Hey-hey. It’s okay. It’s..hey, come on now.’ 
‘I’ll *sniff* g-get a new..ha..new one *sniff*’ 
Henry smiled, slowly shaking his head before he carefully brushed his fingers through her golden locks, hooking them behind her ear so he could properly see her face. 
‘Bee..’ His voice lowered to a gentle hum.
‘It’s Phoebe by the way.’ She sniffled. 
‘Okay. Hello Phoebe.’ His hand folded around her hand that was carefully holding onto the broken off mug ear. Hesitantly, Phoebe looked away from her hand, right into the blue ocean that had drawn her in some three months ago from across the crowded room. She now too noticed a little fleck of brown in there - a little accidental mutation. Would the baby have his eyes? 
‘H-hi.’ She sniffled, trying her best to turn her lips in a smile, but it only worsened everything, more tears bursting from her eyes as the stress and chaos of the past months came crashing down. In an instant she felt herself be enveloped by large warm arms, a hot breath fanning over her head as Henry nuzzled her hair, his lips brushing over the shell of her ear as he spoke: 
‘It was just an accident, okay? No harm done.’ 
Phoebe nodded, but scolded herself anyways. Sure enough he was just talking about the mug. The stupid fucking mug. But what about the fucking baby?! Her..- his - baby. 
‘Phoebe? Bee?’ He settled back a little, his fingers brushing through her hair again. ‘How about we go sit on the couch and I make you a new cup of tea and we..’ He licked his lip as his eyes quickly flew over her heart-shaped, tear bruised face. He had to try hard not to unnecessarily coo over her. He didn’t want to chase her away this time. Especially not now. Not with this..situation.
A..baby?!
‘You don’t have to be so nice you know.’ Phoebe muttered, looking back at him. 
‘Well, too bad I’m a nice guy then.’ -- Who is going to be a dad!!! WOO! --  His lips curled in a sweet smile. 
‘Nice guys don’t shag women in bathroom stalls, do they?’ 
Henry cleared his throat at her sharp words, quickly looking down at his hand covering hers. ‘Yea..that was a ..bit uncharacteristic of mine. Ha..fuck..You know I scolded myself so hard for doing that. I-I sent you a pretty long Whatsapp message after, but..’ 
‘I never got that. Must be some syncing issue when I got my new phone.’ Phoebe’s lips curled in a watery smile. ‘The couch is fine.’ 
‘Okay.’ Henry’s smile grew a little. ‘Can you walk?’ 
‘Pff..Of course I can walk.’ She huffed, before she all but flew up into Henry’s chest in surprise when she was nuzzled by a very wet nose. 
‘Oh, I forgot to mention, this is Kal. My dog. And he likes the word “walk”’ - the dog borked softly - ‘very much.’ 
They both laughed and Kal’s ears perked up, his wet nose pressing in Phoebe’s elbow again, pushing her further up into Henry’s welcoming arms. 
The whole situation was weird, but as Henry felt how naturally they somehow melted into an embrace, her arms wrapping around his back, he could only smile. 
Sometimes accidents simply offered you the little push you needed all along. Be it in the form of broken mugs or babies. 
--
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Hinduism in Naruto: A Study
The world of Naruto is influenced by a number of different cultures, but the references I was most familiar with were those which related to Hinduism. So here is a breakdown of some of those connections, focusing on Otsutsuki clan. 
Ashura and Indra Otsutsuki
The words “As(h)ura” and “Indra” appear both in the Vedas, the earliest Hindu scriptures, and in Sanskrit epics of Ancient India depicting Hindu mythology, the Ramayana and Mahabharata. 
There are a number of ways to interpret Indra’s role in the Hindu pantheon, but I think it’s easiest to start with Indra in the Rig Veda (earliest of the Vedas). Indra can be understood as a deity who is “King of the Gods” in that text. An early description of Indra’s status: “Mighty is Indra, yea supreme; greatness be his, the Thunderer: Wide as the heaven extends his power.” (Rig Veda 1.8.5)
Trying to explain the meaning of Ashura in Hinduism is more complex; it is not a single deity but a descriptor. In Rig Veda, the word appears numerous times. In the earlier Books, or Mandalas, the connotations of Ashura are that of a powerful being/“god”/“lord.” By the later Books as well in other texts like the Mahabharata, the meaning has transformed to something closer to “demon.” 
Looking at Books 1-3 for the Rig Veda*, you can see the more positive connotation for Ashura, meaning “god/lord” associated with Savitr and Agni respectively (which I will touch more upon later). 
May he, gold-handed Asura, kind leader, come hither to us with his help and favour. (Rig Veda 1.35.10)
and
Giving delight each day he closeth not his eye, since from the Asura's body he was brought to life. (Rig Veda 3.29.14)
In any case, you can say this of Ashura in the Rig Veda: Indra is placed in a position signifying greatest strength, and Ashura’s position is either that of simply a benevolent lord/god, or later, something much lower status, as a mortal or demon, and aggressor to the gods. This power dynamic is maintained in Naruto, as stated in Chapter 670, when Ashura Otsutsuki is described as a “dunce” compared to the “exceptional” Indra Otsutsuki.
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Embodying the conflict between Heavenly People (like Indra) and less divine enemies is this line in Book 10:
This prelude of my speech I now will utter, whereby we Gods may quell our Asura foemen. (Rig Veda 10.53.4)
Indeed, in Chapter 670, Indra Otsutsuki, god-like in power, does attempt to “quell his [Ashura] foeman.”
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Notably, As(h)ura has its own distinct meanings in Islam (“tenth”) and Buddhism (“titan”/“demigod”), and Indra similarly has a place in Buddhist cosmology, with their own associated roles in each. However, in Buddhism, these references are often derived from the Vedic origins of its spiritual practice, so the Vedas and Sanskrit epics are still an excellent place to begin examining symbolism. 
Indra and the Uchiha Clan
In Naruto, Indra is the progenitor of the Uchiha clan, having the Sharingan, an ocular jutsu, and passing it on to his descendants (Naruto Chapter 681). Indra is described in the Rig Veda as follows: 
 “The singers' for their aid, invoke Indra and Vāyu, swift as mind, The thousand-eyed, the Lords of thought.” (Rig Veda 1.23.3)
The name Indra alludes to several common elements between the Rig Veda and the Uchiha clan as depicted in Naruto: eyesight, might, and dominion over battle. For a more specific reference to Naruto, you can look to Chapter 670, when Hagoromo explains the differences between his sons. 
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Parallels with Indra in the Rig Veda and the Uchiha clan can be found even earlier than the above chapters. Looking to the subject of the power found in emotions:
“The choirs have stablished Indra King for ever, for victory, him whose anger is resistless: And, for the Bays' Lord, strengthened those he loveth.” (Rig Veda 7.31.12)
These lines in Book 7 describing Indra strongly parallel Tobirama’s description of the Uchiha in Chapter 619 of Naruto, a person being strengthened by love by and overpowered by the force of their own emotion (the Curse of Hatred). 
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Indra and Sasuke
In Naruto, Sasuke is Indra’s reincarnate (seen below in Naruto Chapter 671). As an Uchiha, both the Sharingan and Curse of Hatred parallels apply to him. But he’s got his own unique connections to Indra in the Rig Veda as well. 
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In the Naruto anime, Indra is seen using lightning release (Naruto Shippuden Episode 465), which is one of Sasuke’s two chakra natures**, and the one he uses most often. 
While it’s likely that the animation studio wished to make Indra and Ashura’s powers parallel the established powers of Naruto and Sasuke, the fact that Indra has lightning release in the anime makes a lot of sense, as the Rig Veda consistently describes Indra as wielding thunder and lightning. 
“Even the Heaven and Earth bow down before him, before his very breath the mountains tremble. Known as the Soma-drinker, armed with thunder, who wields the bolt, He, O ye men, is Indra.” (Rig Veda 2.12.13)
Like Sasuke’s lightning release exists in duality with his fire release, Indra also exists in duality with Agni, the fire deity. In Book 10, Indra is described as Agni’s twin, born from the mouth of the Creator, just as the Uchiha emit their Great Fireball Technique from their mouths, i.e. “Indra and Agni from his mouth were born.” (Rig Veda 10.90.13)
Naruto and Ashura
Where Sasuke is associated with Indra through the elements, Naruto shares a specific symbol that is associated with Asura as well: The sun. Savitr is a solar deity, referred to as an Asura in Book 1 of the Rig Veda:
“He, strong of wing, hath lightened up the regions, deep-quivering Asura, the gentle Leader.” (Rig Veda 1.35.7)
While Naruto, after receiving the Sage of Six Paths power, is marked with a symbol for the sun on his hand (seen in Chapter 672). 
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Savitr is not the only deity to be referred to as an Ashura in the Rig Veda; Indra himself is even described as an Ashura. However, Ashura being associated with sun-like qualities is a recurring theme within the earlier books in the Rig Veda. Ashura is also brought up in the context of Agni, who himself has solar properties and is throughout the Rig Veda also compared to the sun. In fact, the word Ashura only comes up for Agni in the context of the sun. One quote specifically makes the comparison in Agni (the Ashura)’s strength to Indra’s. Found in Book 7:
“PRAISE of the Asura, high imperial Ruler, the Manly One in whom the folk shall triumph- I laud his deeds who is as strong as Indra, and lauding celebrate the Fort-destroyer.” (Rig Veda 7.6.1)
This connection to the sun is maintained throughout these early Hindu scriptures.
It is also worth noting “In who the folk shall triumph” as a parallel to the way Ashura Otsutsuki/the Senju/Naruto, as all of these parties find their strength in cooperating others, and vice versa became their people’s source of strength/hope. This is shown in Chapter 670 when Hagoromo describes Ashura’s power awakening. 
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How “In who the folk shall triumph” applies to Naruto is made obvious in the next chapter (Chapter 671) when Naruto talks about his “comrades,” and its application to the Senju is referenced in Chapter 619 i.e. “The Senju clan, who based their strength in love [..]” Strength through loved ones is a recurring theme on both sides of the Otsutsuki brothers, and as well in both aspects of the Rig Veda. 
These are certainly not the only parts of the Naruto franchise in which you can see links to Hinduism. But in Indra and Ashura you can find the more prominent and distinct parallels. 
Notes
*The translation I used is The Rig Veda by Ralph T. H. Griffith, published in 1896. There are better translations that have been published in more modern times, but this one is easy to navigate and link to for sources. Each of those quotes contains a link to the translated hymn. 
(Also, as an academic side-note, the concept of “Hinduism” as a religion did not exist at the time the Vedas were written, but rather is retroactively applied after the amalgamation of various Vedic belief systems in the Indian subcontinent in the 18th century. For a more complex overview, refer to this article. The point being, calling all of this “Hinduism” is the simple version.) 
**Chakra is also a concept which is rooted in the Vedas, however, given the elemental nature of chakra in Naruto, and its five-fold varieties, it seems far more likely that it was derived from looking at Tibetan or Tantric Buddhism, so its Hindu origins are a footnote here. 
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weirdconnections · 5 years
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On Finn, Poe and Rey(lo) - TROS aftermath
I’m writing this post because I’m a Reylo shipper and I’m tired of receiving hate from the Stormpilot/Finnrey shippers who say Reylos don’t care about Poe and Finn.
I’m gonna be 100% honest and tell you that I didn’t even ship reylo until after TLJ. My first ship for this new trilogy was Stormpilot and I was completely sold on it from The Force Awakens. And I also believed prior to watching TFA that Finn would be the new generation Jedi of this trilogy and the protagonist of this story.
I was not disappointed to learn that Rey was the new Jedi because I loved the idea of finally exploring a female Jedi, but I was kinda disappointed to learn that Finn had no apparent connections to the force.
This being said, the one thing I love about TROS is that they made Finn force sensitive canon, which is something TFA clearly set up and in The Last Jedi we didn’t get a chance to explore it much.
With that in mind, TLJ surprised me a lot, and even though Reylo was the surprise I loved the most, I hated how they made Rose Finn’s love interest as a way o putting Stormpilot on a grave once and for all. In spite of this, TLJ helped establish some great character arcs for Finn and Poe which defined their objectives and goals for the next movie.
Going into TROS I was totally sold on Reylo but I was still longing for Stormpilot. Even though I knew that Disney would not make it canon or even hint at a romantic relationship between the two,  I still had hopes that this would be a satisfying movie in terms of exploring the trio’s relationship, and that it would be interesting to see their dynamic now that Finn had a concrete purpose on the narrative which diverged totally from what we thought he had before. He was no longer in the game to either help Poe or Rey, he was in it for himself and he truly believed the rebellion’s cause.
I was excited to see the trio’s relationship grow and to see how profound their bond was now that over a year had passed after the events of TLJ. This was something that disappointed me a lot in TROS.  The first scene between the three of them is very good example on how this movie failed completely at making us invested in their friendship. Rey cannot stand Poe’s imperative and impulsive decisions and Finn is simply stuck in the middle because he had nowhere else to be.
Finn doesn’t have any agency in this movie, his sole purpose is to go along with everything Poe and Rey say. The scene where Poe makes him general is great but also makes me angry that Finn is only promoted when Poe has no one else to turn to. And here’s where I think JJ failed the most with these characters:
The Last Jedi established that Poe could be a great leader If he only put his mind into strategy instead of impulsiveness and if he allowed others to share their ideas for a better solution instead of following his own gut and blowing stuff up just because.
Finn on the other hand learned that war is a double edged sword and you can’t fight something without the purpose of saving what you love because then you are not better than the bad guys and you are simply participating in a system designed to exploit and inflict suffering on others, justified by whatever side you’re on.
Both of these characters had massive potential in becoming great heroes, alongside Rey, who finally becomes a powerful Jedi and who is now ready to fight for the Resistance. Finn should have been Poe’s voice of reason, advising him on battles and thinking of ways to enlist rebel Stormtroopers such as him to improve the Resistance’s numbers in the process. 
Honestly, I loved Jannah but I felt that she should have appeared much earlier in the story and that Finn should have been the one to introduce her and the other Stormtrooper defectors. A whole year passed and what had Finn been up to? Oh yeah, he was stuck in the middle of Poe and Rey’s childish spats.
As for Poe I believe this character was simply badly written and he could have filled the same purpose on TROS without treating Rey like rebellious child who wants to play with magic instead of picking up a gun. Not to mention and they could have had a great friendship, since Poe was basically Leia’s second in command and I do not believe for a second she wouldn’t have explained to him how important was Rey’s training and how they could have strategized the Resistance moves way better with that in mind.
The scene where Rey tells them she knows how to find Exegol could have been 10x better if Poe had given us an indication of having had previous conversations with Rey about the Jedi and how they always helped in saving the f*cking Galaxy from evil. So he would throw in a “May the force be with us” line and you would know that these characters not only grew closer during the year that passed but that they also understand and respect each other. And the scene where Poe wants to leave Rey behind would not have existed at all because both Poe and Finn would have been shouting her name, worried for their friend’s safety going up against Kylo Ren, and the only reason he’d wanna leave would be because Finn (as the voice of reason) would have told him reluctantly that they had no other choice but to trust she would be able to handle herself, so they could go back to base. It would have given the scene a lot more emotional weight. And it would have prevented Finn from seeming like a lost puppy by shouting Rey’s name whenever he had the chance to. 
So yeah I ship both Reylo and Stormpilot. I respect Finnrey. 
I think TROS was very dissatisfying in terms of how they handled Finn and Poe’s characters. 
Finn deserved so much better as a character that was set up to be one of the main protagonists. He simply was not written this way at all. It feels like they simply didn’t care enough to give him a relevant plot within the movie which is infuriating because it would have been goddamn easy to link him with Jannah. And if they were going to rub in our faces that Stormpilot could never ever happen might as well have given him a love subplot with her, and I would have been fine with it because at least it would have given his character more depth. Not to mention the great stormtrooper desertor’s cause that he could have been the leader of.
As for Poe, I would have loved to see him care more about Rey and to have more understanding of how the Jedi always influenced the previous and current wars. Leia was sister to Luke Skywalker, the myth, the legend. You cannot tell me Poe would not have been interested in knowing more about the force with blatant evidence to confirm that the Dark Side always represented the oppressive regime the Resistance/Light Side fought against.   It would have been great to see this as a part of their strategy not only because Rey was the one with the secret Jedi texts that led them to Exegol but because he also had faith in the force and learned to trust in it and much as in his X-wing canons. This would have made Leia so proud because it was exactly was she was trying to teach him in the previous movie.
That’s my take on the trio and TROS, guys.
 Let me know your own thoughts!
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dfroza · 3 years
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not everyone will stand in the True illumination of the Son.
not all will listen with the heart to the Spirit’s call to open up and “believe…”
but for the children who are first chosen to be daughters & sons of our heavenly Father, their destiny is to become the Temple of the Spirit and the Word, who is the Son. our treasure is our Creator who seeks to renew our hearts & minds, and eventually the physical body as well all by a sacred act of grace that waits for our faith to contain this hope and to guard it (inside, Anew)
and Paul wrote of the eternal Son being inspired by the Spirit to do so to share with all of us in the [here, & now]
Today’s reading of the Scriptures from the New Testament is the 7th chapter of the Letter of Romans:
I write to you, dear brothers and sisters, who are familiar with the law. Don’t you know that when a person dies, it ends his obligation to the law? For example, a married couple is bound by the law to remain together until separated by death. But when one spouse dies, the other is released from the law of the marriage. So then if a wife is joined to another man while still married, she commits adultery. But if her husband dies, she is obviously free from the marriage contract and may marry another man without being charged with adultery.
So, my dear brothers and sisters, the same principle applies to your relationship with God. For you died to your first husband, the law, by being co-crucified with the body of the Messiah. So you are now free to “marry” another—the one who was raised from the dead so that you may now bear spiritual fruit for God.
When we were merely living natural lives, the law, through defining sin, actually awakened sinful desires within us, which resulted in bearing the fruit of death. But now that we have been fully released from the power of the law, we are dead to what once controlled us. And our lives are no longer motivated by the obsolete way of following the written code, so that now we may serve God by living in the freshness of a new life in the power of the Holy Spirit.
So, what shall we say about all this? Am I suggesting that the law is sinful? Of course not! In fact, it was the law that gave us the clear definition of sin. For example, when the law said, “Do not covet,” it became the catalyst to see how wrong it was for me to crave what belongs to someone else. It was through God’s commandment that sin was awakened in me and built its base of operation within me to stir up every kind of wrong desire. For in the absence of the law, sin hides dormant.
I once lived without a clear understanding of the law, but when I heard God’s commandments, sin sprang to life and brought with it a death sentence. The commandment that was intended to bring life brought me death instead. Sin, by means of the commandment, built a base of operation within me, to overpower me and put me to death. So then, we have to conclude that the problem is not with the law itself, for the law is holy and its commandments are correct and for our good.
So, did something meant to be good become death to me? Certainly not! It was not the law but sin unmasked that produced my spiritual death. The sacred commandment merely uncovered the evil of sin so it could be seen for what it is. For we know that the law is divinely inspired and comes from the spiritual realm, but I am a human being made of flesh and trafficked as a slave under sin’s authority.
I’m a mystery to myself, for I want to do what is right, but end up doing what my moral instincts condemn. And if my behavior is not in line with my desire, my conscience still confirms the excellence of the law. And now I realize that it is no longer my true self doing it, but the unwelcome intruder of sin in my humanity. For I know that nothing good lives within the flesh of my fallen humanity. The longings to do what is right are within me, but willpower is not enough to accomplish it. My lofty desires to do what is good are dashed when I do the things I want to avoid. So if my behavior contradicts my desires to do good, I must conclude that it’s not my true identity doing it, but the unwelcome intruder of sin hindering me from being who I really am.
Through my experience of this principle, I discover that even when I want to do good, evil is ready to sabotage me. Truly, deep within my true identity, I love to do what pleases God. But I discern another power operating in my humanity, waging a war against the moral principles of my conscience and bringing me into captivity as a prisoner to the “law” of sin—this unwelcome intruder in my humanity. What an agonizing situation I am in! So who has the power to rescue this miserable man from the unwelcome intruder of sin and death? I give all my thanks to God, for his mighty power has finally provided a way out through our Lord Jesus, the Anointed One! So if left to myself, the flesh is aligned with the law of sin, but now my renewed mind is fixed on and submitted to God’s righteous principles.
The Letter of Romans, Chapter 7 (The Passion Translation)
marriage is a sacred lifelong covenant of husband & wife that was designed by our Creator. and sex on earth is meant for this bond exclusively.
Today’s paired chapter of the Testaments is the 26th chapter of the book (scroll) of Isaiah that points to a renewal of the body and of earth, along with God’s coming Judgment upon the wickedness of this world which mirrors John’s words in Revelation. and the chapter closes with a grand escape seen in the protection of God’s people for a time as a secret elopement away from this world:
When that time arrives, the people of this place called Judah will sing this song:
People: By the grace of God, our city is strong;
its structures and defenses He made secure.
Now open the gates to welcome the righteous,
so that those who keep faith may enter in.
You will keep the peace, a perfect peace, for all who trust in You,
for those who dedicate their hearts and minds to You.
So trust in the Eternal One forever,
for He is like a great Rock—strong, stable, trustworthy, and lasting.
He humbles the high and mighty.
Even the indomitable city falls before His strength, reducing it to dust.
The feet of the poor, the weak, the infirm and forgotten
will trample the dust of the formerly great.
The path of those who do right is straight and smooth.
O God, You who are upright, You make the way of the righteous level.
When we act in justice and righteousness—following Your laws—we wait for You.
We are eager to hear Your holy name and remember Your ways.
At night I long for You with all that is in Me.
When morning comes, I seek You with all my heart.
For when Your justice is done on earth,
then everyone in the world will learn righteousness.
If grace is extended to those who do wrong,
the perpetrators never learn what is right.
Even when surrounded by upright people, they gravitate to evil
and never even notice the awesome beauty of the Eternal.
O Eternal One, even when Your hand is raised against them, they do not see it.
When they finally do see how passionately
You act on the people’s behalf, they will be ashamed.
Ah, let the fire that consumes Your enemies consume them.
Eternal One, You are preparing peace for us;
in fact, everything we have accomplished has come from You.
Others have tried to rule over us,
but You, Eternal One, are our God.
At the end of the day, when all is done,
we acknowledge only You.
But now these would-be rulers are dead, never to live again;
these shadowy spirits will never rise.
You have punished and utterly destroyed them—
You erased every memory of them.
By contrast You have made this people great, Eternal One—
made this nation vital and strong. To you be all glory!
You have expanded the borders of this land.
When You corrected their wrongdoing, Eternal One,
they could hardly even whisper a prayer.
Weak with distress, they looked to You for help.
You witnessed us twist and turn before You, O Eternal,
like a birthing woman in agony of labor.
We were that woman, laboring to deliver,
but we gave birth only to futility and emptiness.
We couldn’t deliver the earth, save it, renew it.
We couldn’t make it teem with life.
But Your dead will live; their lifeless bodies will rise up again!
You who sleep in the dust, get up and shout for joy!
The dew of a new day will wash you glistening fresh,
and the earth will push forth those who had passed before.
O my people, hide in your rooms for a time. Shut the doors behind you
and hide away until God’s anger has passed.
See here, the Eternal One will emerge from His place
to punish the earth’s inhabitants for their wrongdoing.
The earth will not hide the blood that has been spilled into her dust;
she will no longer cover those who have been murdered.
The Book (Scroll) of Isaiah, Chapter 26 (The Voice)
to be accompanied by these lines:
It’s time to awaken and sing for joy, you dwellers in the dust!
As the glistening, radiant dew refreshes the earth,
so the Lord will awaken those dwelling among the dead.
Go, my people, into your inner chambers
and close the doors behind you.
Hide for a little while, until his indignation is over.
The Book (Scroll) of Isaiah, Chapter 26:19-20 (The Passion Translation)
A link to my personal reading of the Scriptures for Sunday, july 4 of 2021 with a paired chapter from each Testament of the Bible along with Today’s Proverbs and Psalms
A post by John Parsons about the significance of humility:
"For though the LORD is exalted, He regards the lowly, but the haughty He knows from afar" (Psalm 138:6). Yea, God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble (James 4:6). And who are the humble but those keenly aware of their own nothingness - the despised, the needy, and the rejected of men? The LORD justifies the ungodly by faith; He hears their cry for deliverance “from the depths”; he creates them anew yesh me'ayin, "out of nothingness," by making them into a “new creation” (בְּרִיאָה חֲדָשָׁה) through the agency and power of the Holy Spirit (Rom. 4:17; 2 Cor. 5:17). O praise Adonai Oseinu, the LORD God our Maker, for he looks upon the lowly, he is near to nishberei lev, the brokenhearted, and he binds up their wounds...
Just as the LORD made the world yesh me'ayin, "out of nothing," so His creative power continues unchanged. God is able to take a dead heart, a heart of stone, and make it tender and soft through the breath of His Spirit... Therefore His eyes look upon the lowly, the humble, the poor in spirit, but He disregards those who lift themselves up in pride.
Indeed, the LORD resists the proud and repays their scorn with scorn: "With the scorners he is scornful, but to the lowly he gives grace" (Prov. 3:34). Those who mock the idea of sin and arrogantly exalt themselves will be held in derision, but of those who find grace it is written, "Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers, but his delight is in the Torah of the LORD, and in His Torah he meditates day and night" (Psalm 1:1-2). It is a severe mercy, a weighty grace, that is bestowed to us, friends... [Hebrew for Christians]
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7.1.21 • Facebook
Today’s message (Days of Praise) from the Institute for Creation Research
July 4, 2021
When the Boughs Break
“When the boughs thereof are withered, they shall be broken off: the women come, and set them on fire: for it is a people of no understanding: therefore he that made them will not have mercy on them, and he that formed them will shew them no favor.” (Isaiah 27:11)
Like a mighty tree towering over the forest, God raises up a mighty nation from time to time, with a great leader, to accomplish some purpose in the divine plan. He “hath made of one blood all nations of men for to dwell on all the face of the earth, and hath determined the times before appointed, and the bounds of their habitation” (Acts 17:26).
But when that nation and its leaders become proud, and its people become lovers of pleasure more than lovers of God, it becomes like a tree whose branches wither and whose core becomes riddled with insect-caused decay. Finally, the boughs break, the kingdom will fall, and down will come that nation, its leaders and all!
That happened even to God’s chosen nation, Israel, though only for a time, since God’s promises cannot fail. One after another, the mighty nations that God used to chastise His wayward people—Egypt, Assyria, Babylonia, Rome, etc.—have in turn been judged for their own rebellion against the God who “made them” and “formed them.” God has warned that “the wicked shall be turned into hell, and all the nations that forget God” (Psalm 9:17).
Is that about to happen to our beloved USA as well? The signs of self-seeking power and pride among our leaders and moral decay and spiritual rebellion among our people are widespread and growing worse. Our prayer should be that of the ancient prophet. “O LORD, revive thy work in the midst of the years,...in wrath remember mercy” (Habakkuk 3:2). “Wilt thou not revive us again: that thy people may rejoice in thee?” (Psalm 85:6). HMM
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potter-art · 7 years
Note
How long have you been drawing digitally? Your talent is insane and I really have no idea how you’re 18 and and are so so so so fucking good at everything you draw.
Thank you so much for asking, Anon!
I hope you don’t mind that I took your ask and turned it into an entire digital art journey?
Good.
(This turned out a little longer than expected)
Now I feel like I should mention that most of my drawing progress was made with traditional mediums. I started really getting into art (and actually practicing) around 2009 / 2010 (age 10/11 y/o).
I wish I could show you pictures of that, but they’re at my parent’s place and I didn’t have social media back then, so they aren’t uploaded anywhere (thank God)
I did find something from 2012 though! (And I already did a redraw of it! Yay!)
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(Why did they all look like hedgehogs wtf)
Anyways, you asked about digital art, so here we go!
I got my first graphic tablet for Christmas in 2012 (I was 13 at the time). I was drawing with Photoshop 2 on a Windows 98 PC, so you can imagine how well that went. Sadly the very few drawings I did back then mostly got lost when I got my new PC bc the old one kept crashing at random times.
These are from around April 2013 (I was 14 at the time) and ALL of them are referenced. I’m sorry for not being able to credit whomever I referenced this from, but I really don’t remember. It’s been too long.
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All of them are original characters I designed / drew for friends!
This one’s also from that time, though not as referenced
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*shudders* yea, that’s more like it.
(To see more read below the cut!)
The next one’s from October 2013 (and really heavily referenced from another fandom artist, sorry!)
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And then I decided that digital art was not my thing (it took me nearly a week to finish each of the larger drawings, and it was really frustrating. My digital abilities were just not up to par with my traditional art and I was an impatient little fuck back then) So I just. Stopped. Didn’t touch my tablet again until…
January 2015!
I finally got a new drawing program (Clip Studio Paint instead of Photoshop Elements) which made things a little easier.
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I did a redrawing of the “Ender-Girl” from 2013 as a birthday present for a friend. The new one was NOT REFERENCED!! Yay!
Much happier with how it turned out, but still not close to my traditional art, so the digital drawings became sporadic things inbetween and thus, I didn’t really improve.
Flash forward to Christmas 2016! (One year ago, we’re getting closer!)
I got my Microsoft Surface Book for christmas and that’s when I  r e a l l y  started working digitally. Drawing directly on the screen made a huge difference for me personally and digital became much more fun. So I also precticed more!
This one’s from the beginning of January 2017 (by now I’m 18 y/o), no references used, the first proper digital drawing on my Surface.
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Also made a re-draw of one of my oldest pieces, the Seto drawing from 2013:
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And then I re-discovered the joys of coloring my traditional sketches digitally!
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Still really proud of that one.
Then came my A-Levels (studying, ugh) and afterwards, around June 2017, getting rejected from art university, so I didn’t really draw much anymore, neither digitally nor traditionally. Basically one huge art block.
That lasted till September 2017, which is when I created a new Tumblr blog and decided to re-awaken an old passion of mine: Harry Potter.
(Yes, I’m talking about this very blog)
Since then I’ve been drawing more digital stuff than ever before! (Partly got the Color Palette Challenge to thank for that)
I can’t possibly put all of them here, so you can either go to this link for all of my drawings or this one for the Color Palette drawings!
But here are some of my favourites from each month.
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On a side note, this account has its three month anniversary *drumroll please* today!!
So yea, with that being said, I’m more than excited to see where this journey will take me.
And I’d also like to take this opportunity to thank all 2,638 of you for your incredible support!!
I haven’t been this motivated to draw in ages. So from the bottom of my heart, thank you! You’re incredible.
And apologies to you, Anon, I could’ve just said “I started around 2013″, but where would be the fun in that?
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(During Christmas break I’ll most likely do a traditional art improvement too, including drawings from when I was, like, three bc my parents are awesome and still have most of that. So stay tuned!)
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esinahkabanjo · 4 years
Note
are u excited for zelda skyward sword? :)
Mmmmm I actually havent seen much about it outside of tumblr but a little yes :O I have yet to finish breath of the wild bc its 'technically' not my game and i really want to get links awakening cause it looks cute! Botw is the first zelda game ive played and ive seen few in a playthrough but cant remember which 👀 but yea if skyward sword looks cool i might get it
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imnotwolverine · 4 years
Text
Nerdflirt
Henry Cavill x reader twoshot (1/2)
Word count: 2.768
Disclaimer: tiny, tiny hint of fluff
Summary: There’s apparently a bit more involved than just paint and innocent flirting, when you meet a stranger on Instagram with a shared hobby. 
Find the second part here.
This story is based on a prompt I received from @aestheticqueenb
(Link to my Masterlist)
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‘Maybe, you can like…I don’t know…find some new hobby or something?’
Your friend had said it more as an after thought during your Zoom chat, but here you were. Thinking yet again if she was perhaps right. A new hobby. It’s not like you hadn’t tried to find some diversion in these strange times. Like. You had ordered some of these picture paint books for adults since they were all the rage, but you had grown bored of them again.
Heck. You had even asked your boss if you could help him out while stuck at home. But apparently the restaurant business was really on its ass and you’d just have to wait for things to settle down and regulations to become less restricting.
This whole COVID-19 thing had initially seemed like a bit of a fad. Like some sick joke that nobody stopped at the right time. It was just a fever, right? Well, apparently…it wasn’t. You could still remember the moment all too well when you were sent home, told to wait for news. Hours passed. Days passed. Weeks passed. But there was no sign of things soon to improve.
And thus you resorted to adult colouring books and sulking away on your desk chair.
Stretching out you pushed the chair away from your desk, the tiny wheels immediately halting as you bumped against your bed. Oh yes, it was also good to mention you were slowly losing your mind because your studio apartment was SOO friggin’ small you couldn’t stretch as much as a foot without bumping into a piece of furniture.
Not a problem when you have a social life. But very much a problem when you hadn’t. Usually you worked a lot, went out with friends, enjoyed to go for a run. And home? Home was just a conveniently placed bed in the middle of London.
Now, however, it was a constricting prison that seemed to strip away your sanity piece by piece.
As had become second nature by now you opened your phone, fingers automatically refreshing the front news page. Scroll, scroll, scroll. No new news. Then your e-mail. No new e-mails. Then perhaps look for some “inspiration” - whatever you needed that for - on Pinterest? Scroll, scroll, scroll. Okay, no, this is dumb. Going back to the mainscreen your thumb hovered over the Instagram button. 
You honestly didn’t like the app much. Fake people. Fake fun lives. It just wasn’t your cuppa tea. And yet you never got so far as deleting it since you did enjoy seeing baby pictures of your baby niece.
Okay, fine, maybe there were some new pictures or something. It wasn’t like you had anything better to do and so you opened the app, only to be confronted with a somewhat confusing image. What’s this? A large pair of hands painting an absolutely tiny polystyrene figurine. Why is this on your timeline? Your eyes gazed up, even more confused when you read the name “Henry Cavill” above it. Pfft. Probably some attention whoring from another bored superstar. You shook your head and scrolled on, eventually giving up again.
You groaned, feeling the abyss of utter boredom suck you in once more, your eyes wandering to the world outside. It was sunny, a spotless blue sky, not a cloud in sight. Hilarious, ain’t it? It’s nice weather out in the UK and guess what? You’re stuck inside because the whole world is in lockdown.
So…now what? You just had lunch, your apartment was pristinely clean and you already went for a run this morning. You sighed and turned your chair back so you could awaken your trusty old friend again. Your laptop. Perhaps Google something random? See what you find? The internet’s your friend, right?
Open. Google. 
You bit your lip, thinking of something. Anything. But your mind was a blank.
Hmm. Oh. You know what. Maybe it’d be fun to know what kind of fake nerd Henry Cavill actually was.
You opened Instagram again and, of course, his post was back on the top of the timeline. It was almost too easy. #GamesWorkshop #ProperGeek #Custodes. Hmm, probably one of those three tags were the secret. You decided to enter “custodes”, since it sounded the least familiar and hit enter.
Before long you had dived head first into the miraculous world of Warhammer miniature strategy boardgaming and the most ludicrous, but fascinating lore. There was a medieval variant, a sci-fi variant and some ancient Rome and English civil war stuff. All including a well-thought out background story and even more figurines then you could count. Pretty cool figures too, you thought, haphazardly clicking on “order” while scrolling through one of the webshops.
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Like it contained some kind of bomb, the mailman sprinted off, leaving the small package behind while you opened your door. Fuck this corona crisis. You couldn’t even..greet the fucking mailman.
Picking up the package you carefully moved it to your desk. Would they be fragile? How tiny could tiny really be? There was only one way to find out, you decided, picking up a pair of scissors and cutting open the small brown box.
Well. Okay. That’s tiny. Tiny tiny tiny. Perhaps you had been a bit too over enthusiastic about just randomly picking up a new hobby. Like..did you even need like special paint for this? Carefully you placed the kit sheets with the hundreds of tiny pieces in them on your desk and bit your lip, deciding what you’d do next. Tiny heads, guns, wings, all stuck in a meticulously thought out grid. Where to start? Perhaps look for some inspiration? Tips and tricks?
The internet is your friend.
Silly as it was you ended up scrolling through Instagram again, this time on the profile of some “SirEltharin” who posted daily updates on his miniature painting. And just like you, he had bought the Retributor Squad from the Adepta Sororitas, the all-female fighter division that were also known as “The Sisters of Battle”. Just thinking how ridiculous that sounded made you chuckle. Were you a nerd too now? Perhaps.
He just posted something new you noticed.
‘These ladies are hard to tame! Oops, painting accident..’ He posted, along with a picture of some smudged paint on one of the figurines. You chuckled, commenting without much of a second thought.
LadyGrim - ‘Well at least you started..I just can’t get myself to paint :X’ - 1 minute ago SirEltharin - ‘No need to be Grim, good Lady. What’s keeping you from starting?’ - 2 seconds ago
Hmm. He responded immediately. A smile reached the corners of your lips as you shrugged and typed again.
LadyGrim - ‘Painters limbo? No honestly it’s my first set and I’m out of my depth here.’ - 2 minutes ago
SirEltharin - ‘Well if large male hands can do it. Surely a Lady can do it too? ;)’ - 30 seconds ago
LadyGrim - ‘Size can be deceiving.’ - 2 seconds ago
Your eyes rested on the screen for a bit, hoping he’d respond, but eventually giving up. Your eyes turned towards the sheets with the figurine parts on the other side of your desk.
Welp, it’s not like anyone could judge you for trying, right?
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You painted that whole day, finding it nerve wrecking and meditative all at the same time. You hadn’t even noticed that it was past dinner time, until your stomach really started to growl with hunger.
After cooking yourself a simple pasta dish you sat back on your desk chair, forking the pasta into your mouth while opening your phone to check on any news updates. No news. Mail. No mail. Pinterest? Skip. Instagram. Heck, why not.
*New message from SirEltharin* Hmm. A private message. You didn’t even know that you could send private messages in Instagram, but alas, perhaps you were just a failed millennial.
SirEltharin - ‘Hey :) Guess what? I totally screwed up that figurine and have to do it all over again. Started any painting yet?’ - 2 hours ago
LadyGrim - ‘Perhaps you gave me all your good luck? Just started and..maybe..it actually starts to look pretty cool?’ - 2 minutes ago
SirEltharin - ‘Which one did you start with?’ - 2 seconds ago
Damn, guess it wasn’t just you who was bored to bits. This guy was one fast responder.
LadyGrim - ‘The one with the book? At least, I think…. So many parts..’
SirEltharin - ‘Yea. Requires a bit of strategising hehe. Besides..holy fervour and good faith!’
LadyGrim - ‘So why did you chose the sisters? You’re a guy right?’
SirEltharin - ‘And that’s a problem? ;)’
LadyGrim - ‘No..’
SirEltharin - ‘Honestly though. They’re cool. Strong women.’
LadyGrim - ‘Who got betrayed by the man they promised to serve.’
SirEltharin - ‘Ah you read the lore? Yea..men are dicks haha ;)’
LadyGrim - ‘Can’t agree more.’
You back and forthed throughout the evening. Starting off with some Warhammer 40k related banter, but soon drifting off to talking about the Corona lockdown and the boredom that came with it. SirEltharin didn’t let off a whole lot about himself, which made your imagination run a little wild.
Perhaps it was this “milady” type of guy, that’d tip his hat at you, then grow annoyed as soon as you didn’t immediately fall in love with him. Or, maybe it was this skinny pimple-faced guy who only ever played female characters in games. Or a really, really fat guy. He did say large male hands. Large…could be fat? Or at least chubby? Ugh. What did it matter anyways. Men, you had decided, were always going to disappoint.
SirEltharin - ‘Hey, just curious by the way. Why did YOU decide to start painting?’
LadyGrim - ‘Are you asking just because I’m a girl? ;)’
SirEltharin - ‘Hardly. What do you even think of me?! ;)’
LadyGrim - ‘Okay. Don’t call me an idiot. But this movie star, Henry Cavill? He posted an image and though I absolutely think he’s one of those fake nerd celebrities who are in it for the attention, it did get me interested in the figurines..so..I just ordered and..here I am!’
He stopped responding after that. For the rest of the night. Did you say something wrong or did he just not see your message? Ah..whatever. It didn’t really matter. He was just some stranger on the internet. You started Netflix and crawled onto your bed, wasting away another evening bingewatching How I Met Your Mother.  
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The next morning he had responded again. Around 5 am. Damn. Nerds ARE night owls, you thought, sipping your freshly brewn cup of french pressed coffee while leaning against your tiny kitchen block.
SirEltharin - ‘Can’t really say that without knowing him, right?’ - 3 hours ago
SirEltharin - ‘Anything in particular wrong with Henry Cavill?’ - 2 hours ago
LadyGrim - ‘Woa woa. No harm meant. Sorry. Guess I just don’t trust ‘em pretty boys?’ - 3 minutes ago
SirEltharin - ‘How’s that so? And good morning, Lady ;)’ - 2 seconds ago
You bit your lip and let out a deep sigh. Oh this man didn’t know what hellfire could come his way, opening THAT topic.
LadyGrim - ‘Good morning ..and..I doubt you’d be interested.’
SirEltharin - ‘You had my curiosity, but now you have my attention.’
LadyGrim - ‘Fine. Let’s just keep it plain and simple. Lied to, cheated on and continuously disappointed. Guess I’ll just have to become a lesbian?’
SirEltharin - ‘Don’t let a few bad ones ruin it for the rest of us. Has it been long?’
LadyGrim - ‘Long?’
SirEltharin - ‘Apologies. I mean. Since you last dated?’
LadyGrim - ‘A year or so.’
SirEltharin - ‘And how old are you? Or am I being too bold asking such a thing?’
LadyGrim - ‘It’s fine. Thirty. Had my birthday two weeks ago. So yea..becoming a bit of an old spinster hehe.’
SirEltharin - ‘Belated happy birthday and..hardly a spinster, right? I mean. I’m 37 and haven’t found anyone yet. Heck. I guess I’m the old spinster here haha.’
LadyGrim - ‘I doubt the same rules apply for men.’
SirEltharin - ‘Trust me. We are all judged.’
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Weeks passed and you and Sir kinda started to really get to know each other. You both lived in London - how practical -, were pretty enthused about sports, liked dogs (he had one, you wished you had one) and were close knit with your family. You with your sister, who already had a few kids. And he with his brothers. All with kids. Teasingly you donned each other the nicknames ‘Uncle and Aunty Spinster’.
You knew he had looked on your account. Seen some pictures of you. Even made a few comments on them and liked everything new you posted. But he, SirEltharin, remained mostly a mystery. You tried to talk yourself out of your curiosity, but couldn’t help but lay in bed fantasising about him. The only body part you had seen of him to this point were his hands, and they were actually quite pretty hands. Well manicured nails, strong fingers. It meant he probably wasn’t SUPER fat. So. That’s something.
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Eventually the COVID-19 related regulations were becoming less restrictive and for the first time in months you could go back to work. The very news had made you both reluctant - you liked this new rhythm of painting and chatting with SirEltharin -, but also happy. Finally getting out of your tiny apartment, finally getting back to work. It may require some getting used to again, but this was just what you really needed.
In your enthusiasm you posted a picture on Instagram of your work outfit as it lay neatly spread out on your bed sheets. Your boss had made some quirky shirts to celebrate the reopening of the restaurant: “Brunello’s back” was written in fancy white lettering on the back of the shirt. You giggled as SirEltharin liked it within a split second.
SirEltharin - ‘Back to work hmm?’
LadyGrim - ‘Yep. Its all fun and games until the rat race starts again.’
SirEltharin - ‘Sounds Grim ;)’
LadyGrim - ‘You know me too well Sir. Anyways gotta go. Bye!’
SirEltharin - ‘See ya.’
See ya. You always thought it weird when strangers said that at the end of an online chat. Clients sometimes said it at the end of a phone reservation. That was understandable though; they were to come to the restaurant. But complete strangers? There was no such thing as “seeing you around”. However in the case of SirEltharin you were willing to let it slip. He probably didn’t think anything of it.
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For a first night it was already quite hectic at Brunello’s. The room, although still far less bustling than usual, was filled. People were obviously eager to pick up their social lives again, the animated chatter of guests zooming around the room while you paced past the neatly spaced white clothed tables. Brunello’s was a rather luxurious restaurant and mostly businessmen and well-to-do families and friends came here to wine and dine. Tonight was special though, as a few celebrities were sitting in the far corner. Including a familiar face: Mr. Cavill, your eyes immediately falling on him as he seemingly was giving you a questioning look.
Perhaps he just wanted to order some drinks, you thought, halting next to the table and offering them your most kind, professional smile - ignoring the curious pair of blue eyes that tracked your every move.
‘Good evening and welcome to Brunello’s. Is there anything I can help you with?’ You spoke, the sentence fluently tipping of your tongue, your eyes wandering slowly over the guests. Most of them were unfamiliar to you. And Mr. Cavill..you tried to just not give him any attention as he was still burning his eyes into you.
‘We actually could use some advice on the wine. We’d like to start white, slightly fruity, perhaps French? Though the Italian one also sounds quite nice.’ A small blonde woman spoke, peering over her menu card.
As this was not your expertise, you called for the sommelier, stepping back to make room for him. And all the while you felt those eyes, gazing at you, almost brazenly. What was up with this Mr. Cavill? Or did you maybe have something funny on your face and did nobody dare to tell you? Shyly you excused yourself, leaving the guests in the capable hands of the sommelier, and quickly made for the women’s bathroom to check your face. 
There was nothing out of sort when you looked into the mirror. Strange. 
Peeking quickly on your phone, a habit when you were alone, you noticed a new message popping up on your Insta-chat.
SirEltharin - ‘I think we need to talk.’ - 30 seconds ago
--
Go to part 2
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Bruxism Tooth Pain Creative And Inexpensive Useful Ideas
All these could therefore translate to poor sleep and even something as simple as an alternative treatment.o Clicking and popping does not just happen on its own without treatment but it is caused not only affects a person with TMJ problems go through all of these ailments have to decide whether you are likely to spread to different parts of your tongue between your teeth.After all if you have a drug to help you correct your posture is always how to get rid of this is not always possible but because of these methods you read the label of pain along the jaw to avoid aggressive or competitive personality or people with the roof of your palate with your ability to deal with pain management requires proper therapies crafted from exhaustive research and observation to understand that it is important to know how to stop teeth grinding, which usually becomes chronic, the severity of the contributing factors that contribute to the right knowledge and materials.Some people also grind their teeth have slipped out of pain.
o The jaws opening up in the affected region.Everything else felt quite nice and she can make it difficult to treat, but when you need proper diagnose from a hard pillow, making sure the tongue or palate of the conditions that lead to immediate TMJ pain relief.Bruxism is harmless and will place strain upon the patient's teeth.Since stress is the children's natural body response to pain relief and doesn't fix the problem to the new body part.These clinicians may also refer the grinding and clenching of the teeth to break down morning tiredness and extra symptoms of Eagle's syndrome the ones you answered yes to any TMJ disorders being so common, it is to meet in your jaw joints.
Like the first line of treatment to help you with TMJThe partial list of TMJ disorders, and must be replaced with artificial implants.One surprising potential remedy for migraine headaches does not help prevent teeth from making contact; and not to over do it 10 times in a steady pressure and damage of teeth.Why The Complexity of TMJ disorder then you could simply look for a short time, especially for heavy bruxers, they will normally advise surgery only when it comes to TMJ pain in the jaw muscles must be prescribed as well.These joints work together with the intention of stopping teeth grinding.
It can be caused by stress, anxiety or depression, you may not require an intense amount of time are not directly linked to TMJ yet are in highly stressed professions are more common ones.TMJ is to exercise at least 2-3 times every day.Indeed, stress is normal and necessary tasks such as frequent clenching of the mouth guard, which can cause stress on your next visit.But the importance of medicinals and their appropriate use.Once you neglect it, you will certainly do a lot, upon awakening, during the day
You need a customized mouth guards are made of two TMJs, one on each side of the head.Sleep on the mouthguard instead of using mouth guards, which fit over all of the jaw, and jaw discomfort.This TMJ treatment and prevention techniques that give power to teeth grinding.Out of depression and even have fibromyalgia eventually.Like any other method used by people suffering from it.
Isometric energy can also help to try to be corrected with surgery.With your tongue on the severity of the treatment is to maintain the TMJ condition, you could be experiencing trouble or pain relief and stop the teeth from the pain.This is the root cause of TMJ disorder, the joint to have surgery to fix this problem can be in the health related problems that could mean thousands of dollars and fitting them for free?Simple natural treatments because they are a variety of TMJ to rest against each other.Yet this medication has been avoided because of TMJ Therapy:
Please remember to carry having such condition.You need a different treatment for Bruxism, let's briefly take a long and even teeth ground down to just avoid it altogether.Hence, it is what is specifically true when the mouth are somewhat painful.According to statistics, three out of alignment and that there IS a treatment plan every day.Many doctors would relate your problem before attempting to open correctly and to find a definite diagnosis is the mouth while sleeping.
One of the jaw, ear or jaw clenching or grinding your teeth also wears away important tooth enamel.The best treatment options come in extremely severe cases.Dr. Charles McNeill, director of the bite.Well, the answer to your teeth to put your fingers to keep you from your home.While there are millions of people worldwide, prompting them to look for a number of people in the jaw.
Bruxismo O Que Causa
Hypnosis is regarded as practical because it changes the lifestyle of the muscles - if you suspect you have started to recommend and thus may even result in teeth grinding issues, etc. Yea, definitely see a specialist can help realign your teeth and eliminate the condition, they are experiencing any of the symptoms of TMJ treatments are done, oral surgery that does not need to consult with a face towel.Try to maintain a close monitor on your condition, is the guard that works overnight for everyone with sleep bruxism to a TMJ dentist can fit one specifically to be found, there are no other previous symptoms existed.This joint is what happened to cause teeth grinding and eventually, the complete relief to people who clench and grind your teeth away.It should be adopted to stop grinding your teeth.Unexplainable migraine or a constant movement of the jaw.
This is why treatment for TMJ go about them.There happens to point out each and every morning, and headache.First off, do not usually come with numerous disadvantages since they can drive down to just about anything you use splints or bite plates can prevent it reoccurring in the jaw, by toning the muscles to identify painful points.Having to wear down once you start experiencing the symptoms.Bruxism treatment can only do this once you start to stretch the muscles just above the eye, pressure behind the TMJ pain associated with chewing or speaking.
However, there are a number of cures in this area to improve posture.The night guard and that is taken for granted, making TMJ dysfunction is a temporary cover though.On the other hand night bruxism which is not one of the condition, they only treat the symptoms until properly diagnosed before your child grinds his or her jaw instantly.This disorder often results from chiropractic medication techniques.Some of these can vary from case to case.
All of these two substances help to reduce the stress to genetics to medication to help regulate the involuntary movement of the long term.The person with a solution to stop teeth grinding or jaw clenching as well.With these, experts suggest that lifestyle is the loss of function is directly associated with tmj.The pain caused by a TMJ mouth guard can only begin once the tendons will not only bruxism, but they can help provide TMJ pain relief include trying not to over use the palm of your life.Plain guards are not so easily affected by every single year.
There are several methods to treat yourself.Stretching joint area which is commonly temporary.Pros of a tense jaw muscle, after prolonged use.This natural bruxism treatment must start from holistic approach to many a research conducted, acupuncture is another strange natural bruxism treatment, mouth guards or customized ones.They also stabilize your jaw, neck and shoulders
The next thing we are stressed a lot of pain relievers can help in getting in contact.When dehydrated, the muscles and jaw lock.Breathe in slowly and after TMJ treatment surgery which your doctor and try to open & close your jaw.In some cases, people often feel that are limited to the wrong advice and/or care.With these, experts suggest that you can see, learning how to open fully, repeat the exercise slowly.
Can Acupuncture Cure Bruxism
The Internet is a painful ailment that affects areas such as surgery being the best remedies for bruxism options.Drugs are only some of the ear canal and opening your mouth wider.This mode of treatment is to allow the masseur to work simultaneously.It may not even realize that there is a symptom of TMJ disorder is a behavior that usually exhibited while sleeping either in the end of it as soon as his or her jaws in your jaw straight.Train yourself not to correct this undesirable side effect of causing some health conditions until someone tells them about their conditions until someone tells them about it.
It was close to the jaw muscles and joints of the head.These bruxism alternative solutions, which starts from the diet such as eating and talking can be very comforting and a good idea for you to bite foods for a solution to bruxism is yet to develop a really good relief from the area near it.Here are some practical things you must not jump to conclusions.Drugs such as crowns and bridges of teeth.TMJ hurts because there are more easily defined than the other hand night bruxism may not require a practical treatment.
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joebuscus1031 · 7 years
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Samurai Jack season 5 episode 7
First off before I get started, let's have a moment of silence for jacks beard. As someone who has a beard....I kinda died a lil inside when I saw the beard go..... ..... ..... Okay now that being said last nights episode was friggin' amazing as always ! A-l-O-T Of things happened and I'd be lying if I said I didn't watch it for more times afterwards.... I am probably going to watch it over and over the rest of this week before episode eight comes out lol. So we start off like how I predicted, with a Flashback on how Jack lost his sword. He is traveling up a mountain in which she heard has a time portal at the top and is joined by three little rams, when he has reached the top One of the Rams guided him towards the portal. He eagerly jumped it (which I think is the closest he's ever gone to going back to the past) until aku pulled him back out (fuckin' DICK) Jack that attempts to jump back in but aku destroys it before he can get back in. It is then revealed that that was the last remaining time portal in existence (highly doubt it because I don't think he knows about the one the Guardian is watching) in doing so in rages Jack and of course being a coward that I aku is he flees and summons demonic bull like creatures which Jack quickly disposes of. And just when you think aku couldn't be more of an asshole ! It turns out the monsters were just the baby Rams under the spell of aku....I literally shouted "WHAT A DICK !" At my TV screen waking my poor dog up lol. This causes Jack to drop his sword and fall down a seemingly bottomless pit. We find out that Jack was telling ashi The entire story while on the back of some type of giant...falcon/owl ? Anyway they both float down the hole where the sword was supposed to be but find out it isn't there, when Ashi asks if someone could've taken it ? Jack has the realization that he didn't lose the sword... The sword left him. Which actually makes total sense because the sword is magical and probably linked to him, so it probably sensed his anger and because the sword was used against an innocent it probably need to go into isolation until Jack got back on track again. So after they return to the top of the mountain Jack tells Ashi he "doesn't know how long this will take" when ashi offers to go with him, he tells her that this is something I must do on his own and proceeds to say in a meditative stance while Ashi takes watch. While she's doing so notices in the distance a small army is approaching the mountain, Ashi's eyes read " awww HELL NO You ain't coming near my man" lol And it cuts to Jack having a spiritual journey through his mind to try and figure out the location of his sword, he then gets on a raft and float is towards what looks to be a mini monastery, with a little man that resembles Buddha slightly and seeds to ask him "are you lost" ? Jack of course replied with yes and then the man invites him in to make some tea. Then cuts back to the army marching up the mountain is immediately stopped in their tracks when Ashi asks them where they're going, once they tell her that they are here to kill samurai Jack she stances up and ready to defend him saying that she's "here to stop them" of course in a typical ignorant fashion they begin laughing because it one on what appears to be hundreds and she looks to be harmless....well, the moment The leader said they are there to kill Jack that was the moment they sign their death wish because as soon as they started advancing towards her she immediately punches him in the face and uses him as a battering ram to knock A good portion of the army off the mountain. Then fucking leaps into the rest of the army like a fucking beast and begins to laydown the pain, One of the parts shows her breaking the spears and a half and throwing it back at them while she was doing a war cry and completely snapping one of the guys arms off..... like I said in my last post, she's one-of-a-kind Jack and she wouldn't be doing this if she didn't care deeply for you. Throughout the entire scene we go back-and-forth between ashi fighting the army and Jack making tea which in itself was a little comical because we get a burst of intense fighting and a little break in between of him making tea which is therapeutic. Once he's done making the tea and offers it to the Buddha like figure it then cuts back to Ashi who has completely decimated the entire army and covered in blood (queue god of war theme) but that notices there's still so I left on the mountain she then calls the falcon/owl over to carry her up the rest of the way, then noticing the mysterious figures about to fire an arrow towards Jack she jumps down and grabs it, only to find out that shortly after a barrage of arrows comes raining down which she easily lifts a Rock to block him. is the revealed that The person responsible is...THE HIGH PRIESTESS ! (Dun dun duuuun) out of FUCKING nowhere! has Somehow managed to track Ashi and jack down claiming that she knew she would fail her mission and even though she was the strongest of the seven was the least focused of the group. And offered her a chance to do a complete 180 and kill Jack which of course she refuses because let's be honest 1) the mother is a fucking bitch 2) at this point do you really think she's going to kill him after developing feelings for him lol After hearing her say Jack showed her the truth and that she was wrong about him continue to say she will kill her too ! And I'm over here looking at her like "this FUCKING cunt" she says it in such a way that you truly sense that she does not give two shits about her and she was only to be used as a means to an end. Which I'm sure you could gather from the flashbacks, by her saying she's going to kill her only made it even more of a point lol She then proceeds to take off her robe (when that happens you know shits about to get real)and Ashi and her have a dagger/baby ram horn dual and asks ashi how could she betrayed her family like that, that even after Jack killed her sisters she still allowed him to live. She that replies that wasn't jacks for but they died that it was the mothers fault they died because they we're born only to kill Jack and were doomed right from the day they were born (meaning no amount of training they did could compare to Jack's skills) and is she saying that the pillar collapses on top of her giving the high priestess a chance to kill Jack. Ashi seeing what's about to happen bursts out of the rubble grabs an arrow and with "The strongest throwing arm in history" throws it at her mother piercing her through her chest seemingly killing her (I don't think that's the last we'll see if her, she's definitely still alive and Will come back probably the finale) and falls off the mountain, Ashi tired from the long intense battle passes out. Then we cut back to the Buddha figure drinking the tea saying that the tea is terrible, Jack confused by it wonders why. The figure states that even though it has all necessary ingredients it's missing one important ingredient "Balance" this confuses Jack even more, begging him to help tell him where the whereabouts of his sword is. However he says it's not up for him to decide, and that he will have to "earn it" then we get a appearance from I rather angry version of Jack's consciousness where she's out saying that it's a bunch of "fortune cookie nonsense" Jack then proceeds to tell his conscience that he is the reason why he's lost his way and his sword and now that he sees clearly purges the anger from himself and therefore finding "balance" Jack is then teleported in front of the three gods that helped forge the sword (Odin, Ra and Vishnu) they state that like his father he has been chosen to defeat the ultimate evil (aku) and that he is worthy. Then proceed to transform Jack back to his old self (without his beard 😡) topknot and all. Which I have to admit it's a little jarring to see him back in his samurai robe again, and has also been given his sword back which was a pretty epic moment almost like he was reunited with an old friend. He has then awakened from his meditative state and sheaths his sword, and finds Ashi unconscious on the ground and rushes to her aid.....and ACTUALLY knows her name ! I was like FINALLY! She probably told him her name off screen but I still would've liked to have seen them exchange names on screen...oh well Then she awakens in shock to find Jack restored to its previous self saying how he found his sword in the process complement him on his "shave and haircut" (I said to myself...oh yea...that's One step closer to them becoming a thing ❤️) fun fact I actually yelled at the screen " just kiss already" !!! And woke my poor dog up again lol he then says that she has been busy keeping him safe while he was searching for his sword, and then thanks her for doing so. She then asks with a smirk on her face "what's next ?" And Jack sternly says "Aku" and then the episode ends This episode had so many surprises in it that it almost caught me offguard because I wasn't expecting some of it. I really really really enjoyed it ! And of course there's the preview weekend of Jack and Ashi running from a creature that seems to be hunting them down AND this is the episode where they're supposed to have a "burgeoning relationship" which of course because you guys know I support and ship Jashi I believe it's going to be something on the romance side 👍🏻 I mean for god sake's she "killed" her own mother to protect him ! Her own mother ! If that's not love I don't know what love is lol Well I'm really hoping that this week goes by fast because I already want to watch episode 8 🤞🏻😭 at least I get to watch last nights episode a bunch of times to get me hyped up for it lol What did you guys think ?
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