#Nov 9

[heldinhishands]

the devastation was miserable

but hope is a stubborn flame.

i'd rather grow hearts in my eyes,

fog up the glass, let the stars

circle my head, mad with want,

blind, completely gone, hopeless,

lonely for a specific thing

that doesn't scare me anymore

and the exhale of that is telling.

[imawitchywitch]

[k-i-l-l-e-r-b-e-e-6-9]

Faith No More - Epic

[i-am-rmt]

Midnight dances through the leaves on a quiet bridge. On it, a spectre of a man: thin, scared, and facing the moon. As you get closer, you ask him what he's waiting for. Does he need help? A gentle shush tells you enough, and he points to the moon.

Moonlight streams down, liquid, and he turns his hand to catch it in his palm. He laps it up like a dog. You are near the foot of the small bridge now, and he turns, frightened, in your direction. You pause, but it's too late; he jumps into the water below and dissipates into mist.

@nosebleedclub prompt Nov. 9 "quiet bridge"

[disarmluna]

[msbarrows]

Nov 8 - Cleaned the toilet. No Man's Sky has another expedition repeating (Beachhead, the big reward for which is an SSV Normandy themed frigate - yes, the expedition started yesterday on N7 day) so I started in on that and got through the first two of five major stages.

Supper was turkey bean soup from the freezer.

Nov 9 - Finally got around to starting on my monthly backups. Spent most of the day working my way through the remainder of the expedition, with regular "put feet up for a while and crochet" breaks. Decided I definitely need a second ball of yarn for this scarf so I've ordered one, plus I spotted a 3-pack of rather pretty multicolour yarn for not too heinous an amount of money (only $20+ - yeah it's acrylic) and have ordered that as well to use for another scarf (or maybe a shawl) once I finish this one.

Supper was chili and some buttered bread.

Nov 10 - Made a vat of meat sauce to freeze. Ran a load of laundry. Finished my monthly backups. Puttered about in No Man's Sky a bit more and did further work on the scarf; at this rate I'm going to be out of yarn for it in 2-3 days. Hopefully the new ball of yarn will ship quickly.

Supper was a big salad with canned tuna for protein.

[s0r4sp0nyt41l]

ITS MY BIRTHDAY!

say happy birthday right now

[bellzsad]

if u see me reading a colleen hoover book within the next year JUST KNOW that i’m only reading it bc my friend got it for me (i didn’t ask for it) bc i was talking about it with her once and joking about reading it just to see how bad and uncomfortable it made me feel‼️

[shingekinomyfeelings]

Even though I was utterly, painfully tired when I went to bed, I got maybe two hours of sleep last night, so no walk today because I feel like a soggy piece of trash.

Instead, I'm just making sure the bird feeders and baths are full. This county is considered a hot spot for bird diversity, and we try to put out a range of food for everyone.

[sleepy-stories]

[mistfunk]

Mistigram: in 2001, today's date was proclaimed to be World #Freedom Day, in honour of the fall of the #BerlinWall (pictured in #ANSIart, drawn by AdeptApril) on this day in 1989.

[heldinhishands]

i tore myself apart to redefine

what a god was, and now it is me

with the scraps of skin and the wind

against the grass and the blood

on my face to answer all of my

questions. no one ever warned me

of the isolation in winning the war,

and the quiet was only comforting

when it replaced a mighty voice.

now it is me and the whistle of the

trees and the bodies of all i once

believed. i thought i would be

swallowed by oceans by now.

i thought i wouldn't be this soft

wet little stray in search of a home,

a sweet tiny babe with first steps to take.

i was supposed to be ruined and harsh

and mad and raw and touched,

and everything a man would want,

but here i am, victor of the heavenly

fight, still apologizing for all the ways

i'm still trying to grow up.

[elmatadorguapo-lab]

Things That Make Me Smile

ここ数日体調不良が続いていたが、徐々に快方に向かっている。本当はのんびりしたかったけれど、所用のためやむをえず外出した。

無事に所用を済ませて帰ろうとすると、私の中の「小さな女の子」がつぶやいた。

「せっかく元気になってきたんだし、バラ園に行こうよ。綺麗なお花を、たくさん見たいな。」

「そうだね、ずっと我慢していたんだものね」と返事をして、早速バラ園に向かう。ピークは過ぎているかもしれないけれど、まだがんばっているお花がいくらかあるかもしれない…。都心のおしゃれな建物をきょろきょろと見回しながら、ワクワクする気持ちを抑えられない。

体調が悪ければそのまま帰ろうと思ってたんだけど、やっぱり実際のお花が見たい…。

着いたらバラの生き生きとした姿に、満面の笑みがこぼれてしまった。「小さな女の子」も大興奮！「ねぇ、このバラとってもいい香りがするよ！！こっちは香りがないけれど、とってもきれいね。嬉しい！」なんて大はしゃぎしながら、あちこち走り回る。

���に予定もないから、じっくりと周辺から回って鑑賞する。気がついたら、懸命にシャッターを切っていた。うまく撮れなくて、アングルを変えてみたり試行錯誤。光の加減も難しい。お花のいい表情を撮りたくて、同じ種類を何度も撮っている。「小さな女の子」も大張り切りで、あっちがいいとかこっちから撮ったらいいなんて、一丁前にアドバイスしてくれる。

特に難しいのが、赤いバラ。どうも赤だけが浮いてしまって、周りとの調和が取れていない気がするのだ。難しいけれど、とっても楽しい！バラが好きだから、少しでもいい表情で残したい。

ピンク色もさまざまで、淡いものから上の写真のように鮮やかなものまで、八重咲きだったり一重咲きだったりと個性豊か。名前も音楽をモチーフにしたものだったり、皇室ゆかりのものもある。一つひとつじっくりと眺めては、感じたことをメモする。

枯れかけでも、最後まで凛と美しく咲こうとする姿がたまらなく愛おしい。神様から与えられた寿命を全うするかの如く、ただ懸命に咲いている。

「私も、こんなふうに最後まで綺麗に咲いていたいな。誰かに褒められなくていいの。自分が納得できる姿で、最後まで咲いていたい。」

「小さな女の子」の呟きに、ハッとさせられた。

何周も公園を回るうちに、気がつくと清々しい気持ちで微笑んでいる。いつ訪れても元気をくれるお花たち。できるだけ何度も訪れて、いろんな表情をこれからも見守っていきたい。

私たちが鑑賞するそばで、せっせとバラの手入れをする庭師の姿が見えた。これだけの状態を保つのに、見えないところでのご苦労があるはず。思わず心の中で感謝の言葉をつぶやいた。

「いつもありがとうございます。近いうちに、また来ますね。」

帰り道には、いろんなお花屋さんを回った。「小さな女の子」のリクエストで、よい香りを放つバラを一本、連れて帰った。デスクに飾って眺めては、ニヤニヤしてしまう。

Song of the Day

Westlife "The Rose"

[k-i-l-l-e-r-b-e-e-6-9]

Faith No More - We Care A Lot

[currenttrumpcondition]

Day 2: November 9 2024

Status: Alive

Health is not in immediate danger

[disarmluna]

Emily Blunt @ The English Premiere in NYC

Nov 9