#Notre subconscient

[energiologue]

ROMPRE LE CYCLE DE L’IMPUISSANCE

Permettez-moi de vous poser une question : combien de fois vous sentez-vous impuissant au cours d’une seule journée, submergée par des obligations et des attentes irréalistes, coincé dans des situations qui vous semblent impossibles à changer, ou victime de personnes ou d’émotions que vous ne pouvez pas contrôler ? Pourtant, nous sommes nés avec un potentiel illimité de croissance, d’adaptation…

[catie-does-things]

I had a dream about a Muppets version of Hunchback of Notre Dame in which Miss Piggy was Esmeralda and Kermit was Frollo and @ my subconscious I don't think that casting is right but it is very funny.

[mirrorball-leclerc]

suffering since forever

series masterlist

natalia ruiz praying for all of you because at least i like my third wheel

arthur leclerc that's because joris has been stuck with you two since before you were couple

fernando alonso you can say it, since before they were sleeping together.

carlos sainz it's not like joris has a choice.

lewis hamilton and the rest of you do?

max jones-verstappen we don't. we do it subconsciously.

daphne jones-ricciardo like that makes it any better max.

rhys jones i bet it hurt when jorris got that wag of the year trophy and you didn't.

natalia ruiz who let the child speak?

isabella perez she says that because she's hurt.

natalia ruiz i'm not hurt by the 12 year old.

rhys jones I'M 15!!

lance stroll yet you act like you're 12

rhys jones i know your ass isn't talking esteban ocon anyone ever tell you that you're scary? rhys jones never to my face.

zoya torres joris doesn't deserve this heat. let's talk about freya's 3rd wheeling habit.

freya vettel shut your trap torres.

alex albon days like this make me glad that george and carmen love to go on double dates so we don't get stuck with any of you.

george russell and that's because i don't want to get stuck with them.

dulce perez fuck you guys we're delights.

pato o'ward i can't believe i ever thought you people were cool.

daniel jones-ricciardo WE'RE COOL!!

pato o'ward the only cool thing about you is your wife.

penelope trevino REAL!!

gael perez i think pato almost shit his pants when he learned daphne was in this group chat.

pato o'ward IT'S DAPHNE FUCKING JONES, WEY! HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO NOT FREAK OUT?

daniel jones-ricciardo *jones-ricciardo!!

pato o'ward i couldn't care less bitchiardo! i will forever pray for your downfall so i can marry your wife instead.

isabella perez he's so real for that. HURRY UP RICCIARDO THE REST OF US ARE WAITING!!

daniel jones-ricciardo if i ever die let if be known that one of you bitches was behind my death.

daphne jones-ricciardo you people are unbelievable.

natalia ruiz i'll be first in line. i've been waiting for his downfall for the longest time.

daniel jones-ricciardo

this is all your fault.

whatever it is you think i did i swear it was arthur.

charles what did you do?

nothing! what’s wrong amour?

i have a baby screaming for 'unca jo' bring him back now.

ma cherie, i wish i could but i have a race.

okay? send joris and you stay in china.

we only need unca jo, notre petite étoile doesn't need her papa. (our little star)

i know that was a joke but it still hurt. don't tell me that!

you still have a few years left until she's a teenager.

ne pouvons-nous pas avoir cette conversation? je ne suis pas prêt pour ça (can we not have this conversation? i'm not ready for that)

seriously charles ask joris to call me, even zoya's music isn't helping.

i'll tell him to call. just come to china.

i will hop on the first flight to china, do not joke about that.

max said he's sending the jet to pick you up.

god bless sophie for her son.

not jos?

never that man.

natalia_ruiz posted new stories

unseen photo of baby jewel and her 'unca jo' 📸 - zoya because my fiancé and daughter have been stolen by his best friend. and another unseen photo but this time it's pre-baby jewel, joris has been a third wheel since day 1!

taglist: @burningcupcakefire @arkhammaid @applopie @sunflower-golden-vol6 @lorarri @bb-swift @thewannabewriter @mypage-myfandoms @stopeatread @hobiismyhopeu @lilsiz @alessioayla @niniluvsainz @au-ghosttype @six-call @justtprachisblog @nichmeddar @landonorizzz @unluckyyoshi @cool-ultra-nerd @kami10471633 @1nt3rnetgf @fernandoswarcrimes @arieltwvdtohamflash @brekkers-whore @natcha888 @camdensreg @mycenterfold @dear-fifi @georgeparisole @dan3avocado @nikfigueiredo @namgification @jensonsonlybutton @weekendlusting @trouble-sistar @lesliiieeeee @leclercsluv @33-81 @theseus-jpg @sarah-thatstings-ann @minmira95 @casperlikej @formulaonebuff @hopenshaw @ijustgomessitupx @hwalllllllelujah @doodlehunz @prongsvault

¡leclerc-s speaks! this one is a more wholesome one but it's still got it's sense of humor. can you tell i'm still watching greys?

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[cy-cyborg]

Writing Disability: Let us Love like everyone else

[ID: An illustrated picture of a red rose on a pink background. To the left of the rose is white text that reads "Writing Disability: Let us Love like everyone else. /End ID]

Romance is one of the top-selling genres in the world across mediums, and pretty much every movie, TV show, book and game has at least one romance sub-plot. You don’t need to look far to find it. However, when it comes to disabled characters, a lot of creators shy away from giving us romantic plot lines or even hesitate to address the topic of disability and attraction being present in the same character at all. So, since it’s Valentine’s day, I thought now would be the perfect time to discuss it.

It can be easy to miss if you aren't paying attention, but a surprising number of stories in various mediums will pair up most if not all of their main cast of characters by the end of the plot… with the exception of the disabled characters. whether they be explicitly stated to be disabled or just coded as such, disabled characters are more frequently left out of relationships by the story's end. Sometimes, the disabled character will be completely disinterested or the subject is just never addressed, such as with Toph from Avatar the Last Airbender. Toph is implied to have had multiple relationships by the time of the sequel series, but unlike the rest of the original gang, we never see it on screen, so I personally think it doesn't count for reasons I'll get into in a moment. Alternatively, the disabled character will show interest in someone, but their affection is just not reciprocated, such as in Disney’s Hunchback of Notre Dame. Disney's Hunchback is a particularly noteworthy example since it's one of the only theatrical Disney movies where the main character has a clearly stated love interest, but doesn't end up with them by the end.

ID: an screenshot of the hunchback of notre dame showing Quasiemodo, a man with a hunchback and facial differences swinging and singing on at spire at the top of the notre dame cathedral. /End ID

In the latter case, where the disabled character’s love is not reciprocated, these stories will often focus on the importance of self-discovery and self-love. An important message to be sure, but the fact that these “you don’t need a partner as long as you love yourself” stories very often centre disabled characters is frustrating, to say the least (If the character isn’t disabled, they’re often deemed “undesirable" for other reasons, such as being fat, but that’s a topic for another day).

Of course, the reason the character doesn’t end up with their love interest doesn't have to be because of their disability specifically. Even if they were turned down for other reasons, it can still contribute to the stereotype that disabled people can’t find love even when they want to, just aren’t desirable as partners (a sentiment that is especially commonly directed at visibly disabled people) and contributes to the overall lack of representation of disabled relationships.

In the other case I mentioned before, where a disabled character is just not interested in romance, can look different depending on the kind of disability the character has, but in my experience, it often comes from the same place: discomfort. This isn't necessarily a conscious thought or decision on the creator’s end, mind you, but just because it's not intentional, doesn't mean it's not doing harm, even if it’s subconsciously.

A lot of the time, many creators don't even consider giving their disabled characters a love interest. the thought never even occurs to them. I can't pretend to know why for sure, but if I had to take a guess, its because the idea of disability and romance just don't go together in most people's eyes, so the thought never even crosses these creator's minds. But why? it comes back to that discomfort.

When we are talking about physical disabilities and those effecting the body but not the brain, the discomfort can come from a few places. First is the discomfort with disabled and visibly different bodies and how they work as a whole. I've spoken about this in the past, but just the idea of disability alone often makes non-disabled people deeply uncomfortable, and when it comes to visible disabilities, they are often forced to confront that, something that a lot of people are resistant to. they don't like thinking about it, and while many non-disabled creators have dealt with this discomfort enough to include us in their stories, they haven't deconstructed it enough to include us having things like romantic relationships.

This is why, despite the fact that Toph has children in The Legend of Korra, I’m still using her as an example. We see the other main character’s relationships and partners in the original show and in The Legend of Korra directly, but never hers. The most we ever hear of Toph’s love life is that Sue and Lin, her daughters, have different fathers. While the mention was good, when looking at this through the lens of “people are uncomfortable with disabled people being in relationships” you can see how the openly disabled character’s relationships only ever happening off screen and occasionally mentioned might still be an issue, even if that wasn’t the creator’s intent.

ID: A screenshot of the legend of Korra showing Toph, a middle-aged woman with black hair and metal armour, lecturing her two daughters. /End ID

this disparity becomes particularly noticeable, however, in media aimed at an older audience where romantic relationships often mean sex. When the relationship is expected to be sexual in nature, an extra layer of discomfort often appears. A lot of people just quite simply don't understand how sex works when you have a physical disability, and are extremely uncomfortable simply looking it up (there are educational resources out there on the subject, and even disability content creators who focus on educating people about sex and disability, I’m not talking about looking up porn). Often times, they just avoid it by simply not giving their disabled characters relationships of any kind to avoid having to address those questions.

There is also the fact that many people infantilise those with disabilities and associate us with children. This is more common when it comes to non-physical disabilities, such as those under the neurodivergent umbrella (which refers to any disability that primarily impacts the brain) and I'll talk about that in a moment, but it does happen with physical disabilities too, most notably with little people and disabilities that impact someone’s height or physical development. Often, for those of us with physical disabilities, the infantilization comes from people either directly associating us with children because of our appearance, or feeling as though we need to be protected like children.

When talking about disabled people in relationships, this might look like someone being hesitant to pair a disabled character up with someone without a disability because they “can’t protect themselves” if the relationship goes bad. This isn’t something I’ve seen stated directly much in media, mind you, but it is a response I’ve gotten from a surprising number of people in real life when I’ve asked why they don’t like the idea of “people like me” (meaning amputees and wheelchair users) dating. I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s the reason some authors and creatives avoid inter-abled relationships in their works based on how often I got that comment when I started dating; they are concerned about the power imbalance. but this mindset is based on both infantilization and the stereotype that physically disabled people are always inherently weaker. If you’re not always worried about how non-disabled characters would protect themselves in a relationship, why are you only worried it when one of the characters is disabled?

However, like I mentioned before, the disabled character being simply uninterested in romance or sex isn't unique to visibly and physically disabled people. It’s is so common with neurodivergent folks, in fact that it’s become a bunch of tropes all of their own, with the most common variant being where specifically autistic or autistic-coded characters will often be the only aromatic or asexual people in a story’s cast.

For those unfamiliar with the terms, aromatic people are those who experience little to no romantic attraction, or those who experience it differently to most, while asexual people are those who experience little to no sexual attraction (or, again, experience it differently to most). It’s a bit more complex than that, and both terms exist on a spectrum, but in order not to get too side-tracked, I’ll leave it there. I‘d highly, highly recommend Jaiden Animation’s video on the subject though if you want to learn more in a beginner-friendly way.

There’s this idea that a lot of non-disabled people get about neurodivergent folks, especially those with developmental or intellectual disabilities, that we are these sweet little innocent beans who don’t want to or simply can’t engage with “adult” things. In most cases though, this isn’t the true. For some folks, including many creators, this is once again an unconscious bias and is the result of them simply not thinking about or deconstructing their ideas around different kinds of disabilities. In these cases, the idea usually stems from the fact that there are some (keyword some) disabilities under this category that do impact someone’s ability to engage with things like sex and romantic relationships, and most people not overly familiar with the disability community just don’t know enough to understand that just because some people under this category can’t or don’t want to engage, doesn’t mean we all can’t.

Unfortunately though, when this is pointed out to a lot of people, instead of adjusting their viewpoint or seeking more information, they get severally uncomfortable about the idea, even going so far as calling someone who is dating someone with a developmental or intellectual disability as “creepy” because they, once again, associate people with these kinds of disabilities with children. Since children can’t consent, neither can we. This is, once again, infantilization, but much more directly.

While I haven’t seen the full episode (or much of the show as a whole), so I don’t really want to comment on weather it handled the subject well, I do at least appreciate that the show Glee calls this line of thinking out when one of the characters, Becky, who has down’s syndrome, begins dating someone without a disability. The parts of the episode I have seen shows several characters around Becky expressing concern, but their bias is called out by the end of the episode. What I have seen of Glee was during a particularly long stay in hospital while being given pretty strong medication so my memory of it is spotty (not to mention everything was out of order) so like I said, I can’t comment on weather or not it was good per say, but I do remember the discussion this episode sparked in my high school with students and teachers alike, and I remember it being the starting point for some important conversations with people.

As I said, there are some disabilities under the neurodivergent umbrella that might prevent a character from engaging in a romantic or sexual relationship. some. however, it's incredibly important to remember that a lot of these kinds of disabilities exist on a spectrum of support needs, and if the character in question's disability would be preventing them from doing so, they would typically be on the very severe ends of those spectrums and have very substantial support needs in other areas of life too. The vast majority of neurodivergent characters in media don't fall into this category. If you are writing someone who has these higher support needs (and please do, we need more characters like that!), be sure to do your research and double check your assumptions about their capability to engage though. Ensure it's actually reflective of their disability and isn't just based on stereotypes and misinformation. And don't forget, if you’re ever unsure, you can always check with a sensitivity reader or disability consultant.

Even in cases where a disabled character does get into a relationship, one of a few things frequently happen that I think authors might want to be mindful to avoid - or at least approach with caution.

The first is that the disabled character, despite being in a relationship, will be completely disinterested in sex (or any part of a physical relationship, such as kissing, if the content is aimed at a younger audience), often being implied or directly stated to be asexual. The first example of this that springs to mind for me is Sheldon Cooper from the Big Bang Theory. While Sheldon is never confirmed as autistic within the show, he displays many autistic traits throughout both the original show (albeit in a stereotypical way that’s played mostly for laughs) and in the spin-off, Young Sheldon. When Sheldon does eventually get into a relationship though and even gets married, he is shown to be very, very reluctant and overall disinterested in sex.

ID: A screenshot from Big Bang Theory of Amy and Sheldon sitting on a couch, where Amy looks annoyed towards someone off camera, while sheldon looks at her, confused. /End ID

So what’s the problem with this? in a vacuum, nothing. Some people don’t care for sex and don’t experience sexual attraction, and it’s fine to show that - we need more ace representation! I myself am disabled (an amputee and autistic) and asexual, shouldn’t I be glad to see characters like me?

Well, the issue isn’t that this is unrealistic, but rather overplayed and often contains a lot of misinformation about both asexual people and disabled folks.

My disabilities have nothing to do with my asexuality - which remember just means someone doesn’t experience sexual attraction; it has nothing to do with weather or not someone enjoys sex. However whenever asexuality and disability are paired together in the same character, it’s almost always because of the character’s disability. As in, the person in the wheelchair is ace because they can’t feel anything down there so they stopped feeling attracted to people (which is not even close to how that works, but is a real example I’ve seen on a few occasions now) or the autistic person is just too invested in telling you about trains, science, superhero’s or whatever their special interest is, to be worried about sex.

The other issue is, like I said, there’s a lot of examples of disabled ace characters already, and considering how poorly most are handled, many disabled people and asexual people alike are just tired of seeing it. Honestly, until both disability and ace representation and understanding as a whole, improve independently, it’s a combination of identities I’d recommend avoiding in your work, at least for now.

Finally, when a disabled character does enter a relationship, sexual or not, a very common dynamic is that the character will often get very insecure and scared that the person they’re dating doesn’t actually like them, or worries that the other person is settling for them, often resulting in their partner reassuring them that they love them, "despite their disability." A recent example of this can be seen in the web series Helluva boss between the character Fizzarolli, an imp who is a quadrilateral amputee with broken horns and facial scarring, and his boyfriend Asmodeus. While Fizzarolli’s insecurities are primarily focused on living up to impossible standards for success, he shouts during a panic attack that he believes that Asmodeus will leave him if he isn't successful, stating that without it, "this is who I am" - ripping off his hat to show his broken horns and scars (something we are told that he acquired in the same accident he lost his limbs in).

ID: A screenshot of Helluva Boss showing Fizzarolli, a cartoon imp in a clown outfit, patchy makeup and broken horns, anxiously holding his jester's cap in his hands. Behind him, Asmodeus, a large blue, feathery demon in a striped suit, looks on, concerned. /End ID

My problem with scenarios like these is once again, not that it’s unrealistic, but that it shows up constantly. The intention with these kinds of scenes is often to assure the character and by extension, disabled readers or viewers, that they are in fact deserving of love. That just because they’re disabled, doesn’t mean they’ll never find anyone. Once again, it's a good message, however, because of how prevalent this exact scene is, it can actually have the opposite effect.

Let’s step back from disability for a moment: If you see dozens and dozens of people with a feature you have, saying they are insecure about that same feature in almost all of of the shows you watch, the books you read, the games you play where characters with this feature appear, even if you aren’t insecure about it yourself, seeing over and over again that others are, it’s natural that it would start to make you doubt or wonder if you should be. Doubly so if that very insecurity prompts these big, often explosive and emotional scenes.

This was the case for me as a kid, I never really cared much about my disability outside of being annoyed that people stared at me, but as I got older, and I saw more and more characters in the media I consumed saying they were certain no one could love someone like them - someone like me - I became more and more worried. The messages that were supposed to be reassurances, instead told me over and over that the people these characters ”found” were the exception, not the rule, and that most people would, in fact, care that I was disabled and not want to date me. When all my friends began dating and getting into relationships, I began to worry that I would never find “my exception to the rule” and be alone forever.

I didn’t really get over that mindset until well into my 20’s, well into my current relationship with my now fiancé, and I know I wasn’t alone in these concerns. I used to work with teenage amputees, and this was a very, very common fear across all genders and sexualities. I still see it in forums and social media groups whenever newly disabled people join, it’s one of the more common fears brought up, and while I get that scenes like these are meant to reflect this reality and help, more often than not, they’re doing the opposite.

For once, I would love to see a disabled character get into a relationship, and for there not to be any mention of “are you sure?” “How could you ever love someone like me?” “I’m worried you don’t actually find me attractive” etc. These conversations are realistic, yes, but we see them so often that I just really wish I could see more examples of stories where the validity of the disabled character’s relationship is never questioned and is never a concern. It just is.

Of course, as with most of the subjects I’ve talked about before, many of these points are less of a concern if you have multiple disabled characters. If you only have one disabled character and have their love interest reject them, it can perpetuate these stereotypes about disabled people being unable to find love, but if you have another character who is successful in that reguard? Well, it’s much less of a concern. The same goes for if one of your disabled characters is asexual or aromantic, but there’s another disabled character who isn’t, or if one disabled character is insecure about their disability in their relationship, but another isn’t.

Of course, be mindful not to go too far in the other direction either. A lot of people are pretty shocked to learn that disability fetishization is also a thing, and while you shouldn’t shy away from showing disabled characters in sexual relationships just because they’re disabled, it is something you need to be mindful of if your story contains more explicit content. As a general rule of thumb, sowing your disabled characters engaging in the same kinds of relationships, romantic and sexual (including casual hook-ups and one-night-stands) is great, so long as it a) fits the character and the story, and b) is actually inline with how you’re treating those topics with the non-disabled characters.

Personally, I don’t really feel like I’m the best person to advise on where exactly that line between just showing disabled people in sexual relationships/situations and fetishisation is, though the general advice I’ve heard is to ask yourself if the focus is on the disability, or if the person just happens to be disabled. On that same note, I’m also not really comfortable explaining details of how sex works when you’re disabled. If you want to know about either of these topics, there are a plethora of disability content creators who focus specifically on those subjects.

To sum this all up though, disabled adults are, well, adults, so don’t be afraid to treat us as such. Show us in relationships where the non-disabled partner’s affection isn’t a matter of debate or insecurity, show us being intimate and having sex (if that’s something you were doing with your non-disabled characters), let us be confident in those relationships, the same as everyone else, and most importantly, remember that a disability doesn’t automatically mean someone just won’t be interested in us, or we won’t be interested in them.

[imaslutforwritingshit]

Corrupt Her- Chapter 1

A "Lolita" love story- the doomed fate of a nymphet and troubled man.

The prospect of dark love fascinates me.

Mr. Louis Laurier is 33 years old, unmarried, in his prime age, and dangerously desperate for one student he can't take his eyes off.

Esther Cohen is a 17 year old girl, famously known for her streak of intelligence and charming personality. She will stop at nothing to win academic validation, a never ending trial she chose to bear.

Her outdated Catholic school forces the young pupils to wear small cross necklaces, skirts and ties.

And in one class, Esther is unusually failing her exams. Lessons are suddenly harder to focus on with the teacher's eyes on her back.

Esther is a good girl. She's spent her whole life pretending to be.

She is an innocent flame, and yet she is irresistible to the moth lurking around her body.

Louis yearns to succumb to the forbidden beauty of his student,

And the flame fires on, Trapping him in a prison of lust.

Disclosure- I am well aware of the age gap, and Esther will be 18 by the time the two actually have sexual relations. I am not suggesting this relationship is a good idea, nor that this is based on real life events.

Esther is severely traumatized from a messy childhood with her father, causing her to find comfort in denial of her age. She acts the way a child would- irrational and hopeful, even though she's off to college in a year. Louis's character has engrained trauma as well, a reason behind his abnormal attraction to Esther. His heart had never healed from a broken love of his teenage past, and Esther revives that pain. I say this as a precaution, because this relationship would cease to exist if both members were healed of subconscious trauma.

The poetic and charismatic character of Mr. Laurier is similar to Nabokov's interpretation of Humbert Humbert, because even though both are guilty for different reasons, their outward appearance prevents them from being caught.

This story also takes place in a strict, authoritarian catholic school. The take on religion that this school has is not to be interpreted on any bias on my part for Catholics or Catholic beliefs.

This is an illustration of the messed up beliefs people can conform to due to environments and social interactions. This school is not to be suggested as the normal Catholic school, but as a heavily ironic take on outdated and misogynistic traditions old Catholic schools had imposed on children. I hope everyone can express their religion with freedom and peace. Take my interpretation with a grain of salt.

Without further ado, let the story begin.

Corrupt Her- Chapter 1

I am a decaying cherry blossom. My petals of pale pink drop on the snow dusted ground.

My branches are bare, hopeless, stinging from the cold of a December conserved in ice.

The great potential that once was me, had been stripped from my grasp by a winter wind, a dangerous beauty tickling the ends of my frostbitten fingertips.

And all I can do now is accept the tragedy of my life for what it is.

"Notre amour faisait partie des films. Quelque chose qui devait se terminer. Nous savions que le générique de fin allait arriver. Nous ne savions tout simplement pas quand."

[Our love was something of the movies. Something meant to end. We knew the credits were coming. We just didn't know when.]

My sin, my soul, Laurier.

Let this be an ode to you.

Let this be my goodbye.

Let this be your invitation to hell.

Ａｕｔｕｍｎ， ２００１

I've always loved the color white.

It's untainted. Free of any impurities of the other shades, of crimson or violet or green.

It's simple, that's what I like about it. It's empty. I smoothed the pale blouse over my thin frame.

Uniforms have been mandatory at St. Cabrini's Catholic School for Young Women since the school had formed in 1963. And even though 38 years have passed since then, been the uniform remains the same.

We've always been old-schooled. The girls had only recently been given the right to wear pants on winter days.

And if we behave well, we can even wear pink pearls on our wrists as well.

I grabbed the small lunchbox I had packed the night before. It consisted of raspberry yogurt and a porcelain spoon. Nothing more, to avoid the sickness of the demonic girls of Cabrini.

I've always hated school lunch. The girls at my table would mock the girls in wheelchairs, or transfer students, yelling vulgar things that made my stomach clench. The smell of half-baked biscuits and soggy jam packets had always made me queasy either way.

But I'm a senior now. The school will treat us differently. Seniors eat at the picnic tables outside, and stay in the library for those free periods. I think it's a sort of reward for dealing with the cruelty of high school for so long.

I repositioned the mandatory cross on my neck, and slipped on black Mary Jane's. The ones without a thicker heel, of course. Because the boys at school get distracted at any sort of inappropriate gesture. And heels are for prostitutes, Mrs. Barcley said.

The house was eerily quiet. Sunlight filled the room with an artificial promise of happiness. My father was still sleeping, I think. And my mother doesn't leave the night shift until a quarter past 7.

My mother stopped dropping me off at school when I was 7 years old. The bus would wait for me on a hot Pennsylvanian morning, a bright yellow symbol popping out from the thick forest trees.

A symbol of hell.

When I was in 6th grade, I had used the tie of my uniform to form a noose around my neck.

I attempted to die in the girls bathroom.

One of the demons had tried to help me. Delamont. She smeared dark pink lipstick on my face, forming two x's over my eyelids.

A faculty member had found me, clutching the ripped tie with one hand, and the bruising on my neck with another. There, a small-voiced counselor had brought me in, two days or so of questionnaires made by the school.

Suicide Notice Form (For Girls) St. Cabrini's Catholic School For Women ✟

Name: Esther Elizabeth Cohen Grade: 6th

Please answer truthfully. Remember, He sees all. Turn in this questionnaire to your administrator promptly after you finish answering each question.

╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳╳

1. ᴡʜʏ ᴅɪᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀᴛᴛᴇᴍᴘᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴇɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɢᴏᴅ-ɢɪᴠᴇɴ ʟɪꜰᴇ?

I had a bad morning.

2. ᴀʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀᴡᴀʀᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴇᴠᴇʀɪᴛʏ ᴏꜰ ᴄᴏᴍᴍɪᴛᴛɪɴɢ ꜱᴜᴄʜ ᴀ ꜱɪɴ?

It wasn't on my mind.

3. ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪꜱʜ ꜰᴏʀ ʜᴇʟᴘ ɪɴ ᴀɴʏ ꜱᴏʀᴛꜱ ᴏꜰ ᴍᴇɴᴛᴀʟ ʜᴇᴀʟᴛʜ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀꜱ? (ᴇx. ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛꜱ, ᴀʙᴜꜱᴇ, ᴅʀᴜɢꜱ, ᴀᴅᴅɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴꜱ, ꜱɪɴ, ꜱᴇx.)

No, thank you.

4. ᴅɪᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀꜱᴋ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ ꜰᴏʀ ʜᴇʟᴘ?

Everything I did was me asking for help

5. ᴅɪᴅ ᴛʜɪꜱ ᴇᴠᴇɴᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀᴄᴀᴅᴇᴍɪᴄ Qᴜᴀʟɪᴛɪᴇꜱ?

No .

6. ᴡɪʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴘᴇɴᴛ ꜰʀᴏᴍ ʏᴏᴜʀ ꜱɪɴ ᴀɴᴅ ʀᴇᴀᴄʜ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏʀᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ꜰᴏʀɢɪᴠᴇɴᴇꜱꜱ?

It's not me who should be asking for forgiveness. Gwyneth Delamont is the reason I tried to end my life. Her existence is such torture that Lucifer begun to seem pleasant.

╳ ╳ ╳╳ ╳ ╳╳ ╳ ╳╳ ╳ ╳╳ ╳ ╳╳ ╳ ╳

Gwyneth Delamont had gotten in-school suspension for three weeks. Her father moved her away from the state of Pennsylvania shortly after.

My potential is in the palms of my hands. I have never told anyone this before, but I think I can run away from this small life.

The spring flowers and summer rains are the only things that tether me to the quiet town of Honesdale. But I have a plan.

A plan is simple.

A plan never fails, as long as you hold on to it until your knuckles turn white, and your teeth grind into each other, and then maybe you'll succeed, and it will all be for something.

I dreamed of flying to the stars when I was 7. Cosmic dust had cradled me as I drifted to craters in the moon, humming the sounds of sweet melodies I never could name.

I don't think I've ever woken up from my dream.

I'll try as long as it takes for me to be something in this world. I want to touch the stars with my fingers and pretend they wouldn't betray my body into dust and ash.

I want to fly. I want to disappear into the void of black, an infinite nothingness warming my body with liberation.

To find solace in the loneliness of space.

But achieving such a dream means you must be exceptional. And being exceptional starts with the academically validation I crave in every class.

I must be perfect in order to succeed. And I will allow nothing to get in the way of my dream.

❦❦❦❦❦❦

The familiar brick building towered over my soft hair. Its engrained metal words sent tingles of dread down the base of my spine.

A young man with red hair, one I assume to be a student teacher, opened the door for me, and nodded, the freckles on his face smoothed from the sunlight. I smiled sweetly, and made my way through the deserted halls, each soft step of my Mary Janes filling the echoing corridor.

Small pink and blue posters were hung to the walls, a product of last year's student council. The penmanship of the words  "JULY TALENT SHOW," had faded from the summer days, and I urged my body to move forward.

"My dear girl!" A high pitched, womanly voice came from my side, and I turned to meet the familiar face of Ms. Mallory. 

She pulled me in to her large body for a suffocating hug, the cream color of her blouse almost identical to mine.

"Hello, ma'am. How was your summer?" I forced my voice to be polite, as that keeps up the disguise of the innocent, bright flower they all see me to be.

"Just wonderful. Really, truly wonderful. I led the girls choir in our church band." She smiled, uncertainty creeping to the light in her brown eyes. "I missed you at church."

"Oh, I went on vacation with my father. A work trip to our family home back in Michigan. We raised money for the Sunday school activities."

The lie sounded like butterscotch on the tips of my teeth. So smooth, so easy. They all presume my father has any impact on my life, as if his existence isn't similar to one of a dead man's, buried in the dark of the master bedroom, hardly awake.

I wonder when his flesh will start to rot.

Ms. Mallory's delighted smile jumped to her lips again. "That's wonderful. Oh, I said wonderful already, haven't I? Well, I was so excited to see your name in my class again. Did you enjoy English last year?"

The only acceptable answer if someone is asking if you enjoyed their class last year is to nod, so I did.

Having been the smartest girl in school, I am allowed privileges the other girls aren't. My sweet persona works well on each teacher, and with that, I am treated with a private respect.

Ms. Mallory had me in her English class the previous year. She would wink at me as I recited Hamlet, and smile with pride when handing my grade slip back.

I said a few more words of casual conversation, and waved goodbye to Ms. Mallory. I can only assume she acts so friendly to students, because of her lack of relationships with anyone older than the age of 17. Student teacher relationships, that is. Romance is dead when you are close to the grave yourself, I think. I remember the strange fling she had with Mr. Wilsow, and the sheepish kisses they had behind the car door of his dusty Camaro.

I knew he had broken up with her, when the next day of class, Mrs. Mallory's round face was blotchy, her voice a meek wobble.

I trailed my fingertips on the white walls. I recognized this place, from days and long evenings spent wrapped up in school events. The deteriorating brick, and scratched tile, had seemed more home-like then the house I live in, for a very long time.

I scanned the bright pink schedule in my hand, in search for Mr. Dale's name. He's my first period class, calculus being the subject.

I remember Mr. Dale from student council meetings. I can hear his strange voice and see trimmed mustache vividly, as if he was calling my name only yesterday, not a summer ago.

I'm very opinionated on the subject of schedules. A correct schedule can change your entire high school experience. A week ago, when the pretty envelope had showed in the mailbox, I evaluated each one of my periods, and felt relief when I knew most of them.

𝙴𝚜𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝙴𝚕𝚒𝚣𝚊𝚋𝚎𝚝𝚑 𝙲𝚘𝚑𝚎𝚗    𝙶𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚎 𝟷𝟸   𝚂𝚌𝚑𝚎𝚍𝚞𝚕𝚎 → ◘ ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟷- 𝙰𝙿 𝙲𝚊𝚕𝚌𝚞𝚕𝚞𝚜- DALE ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟸- 𝙰𝙿 𝙴𝚌𝚘𝚗𝚘𝚖𝚒𝚌𝚜-PREALY ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟹- 𝙴𝚞𝚛𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚊𝚗 𝙷𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚛𝚢- WHITMAN ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟺- 𝙰𝙿 𝙻𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚝𝚞𝚛𝚎- MALLORY ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟻- 𝙻𝚞𝚗𝚌𝚑 ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟼- 𝙰𝙿 𝙱𝚒𝚘𝚕𝚘𝚐𝚢- LAURIER ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟽- 𝙰𝚝𝚑𝚕𝚎𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚜- OPAL ┊𝙿𝚁𝙳 𝟾- 𝙰𝙳𝚅. 𝙳𝚎𝚋𝚊𝚝𝚎- DAKOTA

When you act good for your entire life, the teachers will show unconscious bias in your favor. Almost every teacher on my schedule had me in a class, one way or another.

The teacher I didn't know was Opal. I heard rumors of her, the passionate Native American women's coach, who was sent on leave after preaching homosexual beliefs to her 4th period class.

We aren't allowed to talk about things like that. Sexuality, politics, anything that has to do with the world outside of the box our principal had created.

Mrs. Mistral, the principal of our school. Reigned the campus for 17 years by now. But you wouldn't tell, because her age is smoothed over by shiny Botox, and pristine liposuction. I had never had a problem with her. Or, that is, she never had a problem with me.

If I had the opportunity to throw her off a cliff, I would take it. And watch her bleed on the boulders a thousand feet below. Maybe that would give me the satisfaction of a miserable 6 years of school reflected on her broken body.

And there was one more name I didn't recognize.

Laurier.

I had searched the staff directory for his or her picture, but the website had come up empty. Whoever they are, they haven't been in the school system long enough to have a profile.

It would make sense, having a new teacher. Our previous biology instructor was a criminal on the run from the Kentucky police.

I suppose our school doesn't do background checks.

The four letters of my Calculus teacher's name popped from a white sign above his classroom.

I released the grip on my sweaty palms, and shook my hair out of my face with a slight rattle of my head. I was here again.

My future, my life, rests on the 180 days of the private school education system.

I must persevere.

And maybe, the clouds will lift, and I will see the world that was behind the fog of my life. A world away from silver chain crosses and knee length skirts.

A world of something greater than I could ever imagine.

Perhaps there's a person behind the one I've pretended to be for so long.

And maybe, I could be her again.

Maybe, I could be free.

Hope you guys like the story so far! I also write on Wattpad, so check that out if you want.

[female-buckets]

27 year old wbb fan who’s been a uconn fan since maya moore and tina charles. you are 100% right. this makes me feel old but the buddy-buddyness of college wbb is not good for competitiveness, and uconn is one of the worst offenders. im interested to hear why others think that might be.

again, not to sound like an oldie, but i think while NIL is a great thing, social media + all these brand deals is making it more about personality and networking than ball. not saying those things aren’t important, but they can be a distraction in college, and players are extra connected to each other bc of social media. while many industries are all about networking when it comes to getting a job, the wnba uses a draft, and you’ll meet those people inevitably anyway. i think all of this is worse for uconn bc they were already famous due to their history, so it’s easy to just rest on your laurels, even subconsciously, and really enjoy that fame, bolstered by social media. they need to realize they’re not just famous, they’re infamous — yes, rivals might enjoy their tiktoks, but they’re still THE team to take down, and they gotta fight back.

uconn itself is in the middle of nowhere in ct, which once might have been an advantage — diana and sue hung out mostly with their team, and weren’t spending their time hyping up rival players’ outfits on instagram.

paige in particularly is so worshiped and so much pressure is put on her that you can see why she’d be especially overwhelmed by all of this. she’s extremely charismatic and loved as a person, but she needs to understand that doesn’t mean ppl won’t try to kill her on the court. she clearly enjoys the attention and is more socially motivated and more of a ppl pleaser than, say, caitlin, who is not nearly as extroverted and who was not as universally liked in college. the fact ppl kept trying to get cc and Angel to be bsfs was so weird to me. it’s GOOD for them to keep their distance so they can be competitors. I’m a paige fan over everything, but she needs to take a page from that book.

Some people really didn't like the posts I made about how UConn is too friendly with the other teams. The NIL era has changed the way NCAA opponents relate with each other.

I genuinely think NCAA players would benefit from narrowing their social life down to their school and family.

And UConn players should not be friends with Notre Dame players. Not during the NCAA season. Save those friendships for the pros. Stewie and Jewell didn't text each other or hang out in college. And they became best friends in the WNBA after a brutal college rivalry. I think it would've been weird if they were friends in college. There's a lot of soul crushing emotions during the Final Four. It's a lot simpler if Final Four opponents are just acquaintances rather than friends. That way the Final Four is just an athletic trial rather than a friendship trial. And when players enter the pros, their friendships with NCAA opponents should start fresh with no history. Clean slate.

[spxcemuses]

@bigspinachpuff asked: 🗣For Judge Frollo

[ Upset Muse Meme ] | Always Accepting

🗣 Pissed off. They aren’t sure why. It might be because someone breathed at them the wrong way and if one more person tries talking to them they’re going to SNAP —

In contrast to the damp, cool air and the misting of rain in the courtyard behind Notre Dame, Frollo was heated. His jaw is subconsciously clenched, an uncharacteristic tremor of impatience flickering behind his otherwise impassive eyes. The source of his irritation was elusive, gnawing at his composure throughout the day...and it was difficult for him to soothe the emotional burn within.

Then, as if summoned by fate's cruel whim, a figure wandered in from a nearby pathway. Broad shouldered, entirely unburdened by subtlety...carrying an air of naivete that was offensive to the judge. Just who was this oaf? His stare is cold, sizing up the man with a faint, disapproving sneer.

" You there. "

He addresses Kronk, his tone keeping a veil of brittle civility and bearing weight of restrained ire. His dark gray eyes never waver in the slightest, intent on questioning them for intruding so harshly.

" State your business as to why you wandered here. I have no time for games or frivolity. "

[joannerowling]

I mean, people are absolutely entitled to argue that Harry Potter is ethically inconsistent and unintentionally revealing of classist biases even while acknowledging that JKR is an excellent writer and that children’s books do not need to lead readers by the hand to the correct opinion. There was a lot of very reasonable literary criticism to this effect right after Hallows was released by perfectly rational critics, well before ‘JKR bad’ took root in mainstream opinion on account of her political activism. I sat in a Catholic studies class in 2008 debating this, it isn’t new.

I never said it was new. I do think it's stupid though, not because i disagree with the argument (reasonably put or not), but because i disagree with the premise.

"Ethical consistency" is a completely nonsensical measure of quality for literature in general. The purpose of JKR's literature specifically is, amongst other things, to be a mirror of her time, and that involves depicting people who feel real. Real people are not consistently ethical.

"Unintentionally revealing of classist biases": Again, it's not that i doubt one could make an argument out of that premise and make it convincing. But it bores me to tears just to think of it. The judgement of it all - hidden being this falsely distant term, "unintentionally". It's so anachronistic. a) As if anyone who is her contemporary could be unaffected by the same biases and therefore credible in this criticism. b) She's right there, alive! You know her intentions, and if you don't, you can ask her them. That's not literary analysis, that's politics. If we're talking about JKR's politics, why not be honest and have a look at her political actions, then analyse how her books reflect them, not the other way around? That's more logical and constructive that this weird, "let's try to reverse engineer JKR's subconscious feelings about XYZ" obsession. I mean, why would it matter anyways? I have subconscious feelings of anger at my parents like probably 99% of people on earth. Who gives a shit. People are what they do.

Also, I actually don't care if JKR shows some classist biases (whatever that means) in her books. Good literature is always representative of its time, flaws included. Victor Hugo was a sexist fool, that doesn't make Notre Dame not great.

[paulysson1]

Miroir de toi à moi

Je devenais heureux avant d'une nouvelle fois être triste,

Je ressens l'effort de la folie qui entre les doigts de mon esprit glisse.

Parfois il y a du bon à oublier, pardonner, et donner sa place, et, y laisser sa plume

Comme la flèche d'argent rend à la lune son diamant sans amertume,

Comme le ciel arrache les liens du néant,

Avant de le redistribuer suite de faute de frappe car tâché d'encre qui épuisait petit à petit les propres synapses si souvent tourmentées par le dessin d'une ombre qui ne se distinguerait qu'au moment même de son oubli

Tout n'est que question de temps en attendant l'oubli de notre propre souvenirs inversé et jugé par qui de droit,

Ce n'est pas une chimère,

De croire cela,

Ou bien la fin de la folie qui Frappe déjà.

Toc, toc, toc,

Frappe de sac et sac de frappe qui éclate devant la charte de ce que je pouvais consentir ou non,

Éclaboussures de milliards d'idées dans un subconscient enfin désengorger,

Une larme de mon oeil afin de pleurer tes propres chagrins,

Et effilocher jour après jour mon destin qui se jouerait sur une partie de dé à chaque millisecondes de l'arbre, des racines aux branches des possibilités

Une cible sur le lit de mon oubli,

J'en souris comme mon grand-père lorsqu'il est parti par défaut de folie,

À moi les rêves immenses de l'inconscience, des rires et des chants de ceux que je n'ai jamais croisés à part dans mon coeur.

Clac au sabre au fil de l'épée sur l'existence si soudainement coupé dans la si longue agonie intemporelle de ceux qui goûte la sève du chêne.

Partir avant de partir après ceux qui nous sauve de ce que nous sommes,

Éclat de rire de ceux qui sont au-delà de ce qui est palpable

Tout ceci ne serait qu'une illusion de mon absence assortie à la présence d'autrui

J'offre le secret de la vie,

Une graine bien germé dans l'immense univers complexe et fertile de l'écosystème existentiel

Et,

une touche,

de,

Toi

P.amis

[accirax]

So I wanna share some additional headcanons I made up for Dan's sister Frannie, cuz it's been on my mind now for some reason..

As stated before, until future greetings say otherwise, she and Dan are fraternal twins.

Both like the colour purple (which is a frequent colour in their wardrobes) and wear glasses & beanies/hats too

I won't say she's a complete physical copy of Dan. She still has her feminine features, with longer slightly frizzy hair flowing down to her waist. They do share the same height though.

They are pretty much like Dipper & Mabel Pines, while they do share a lot of similarities with each other in appearance and certain interests, they are still pretty much polar opposites in every other way.

Frannie is lively, cheery & extroverted; loves to make new friends, while Dan is more quiet and usually keeps to himself.

Frannie's straight while Dan is aroace.

[This one is completely optional tho, for anyone who wants it] Dan is neurotypical while Frannie is on the spectrum (though this was never properly figured out & diagnosed 'til she was 12 - 13). She probably had to rely a lot on Dan in their early childhood because of this, which she is grateful for, though she does want to and tries to be more independent.

Dan operates more on logic & reasoning, but Frannie is more emotional, practically wears her heart on her sleeve and is very empathetic to everyone and everything around her. She's a lot like Gabby in that way..

Maybe that's why Dan bonded so well with Gabby on their season. In a lot of ways she subconsciously does remind him of his sister. (Granted Frannie isn't as wild & unhinged as she is but, you get it.)

When they were little, their duo nickname frequently used by family members & childhood friends was "Danny & Frannie". (Dan gets a little embarrassed when people call them that still. 😅)

Whenever Halloween rolls around, you just know their mom had them wear those matching/complementary costumes for twins as kids (salt & pepper, ketchup & mustard, PB & jelly, sun & moon, etc.). Frannie always loved that~ ^^

If Dan's favourite movie was Meet The Robinsons.. I'll say Frannie's is a mixed bag consisting of Bolt, Tangled, Wreck-It Ralph, The Princess and The Frog, Frozen, Big Hero 6, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Atlantis, Treasure Planet, Lilo & Stitch, and Zootopia. She really can't choose just one. 😅

OK that's all I got. What do you think? ☺

y'know, i hadn't really put together how similar Dan is to Dipper until you brought it up in the context him having this fraternal twin, but i see it now! how long until someone dresses him up as Dipper in a greeting, i wonder...?

these all seem very cute! i can't say i have any headcanons for Frannie myself, given that i hardly ever make headcanons for characters that already exist (barring ones i've created, obviously), much less characters that essentially don't. the "Danny and Frannie" is adorable, though, and i love the idea that Dan gravitated towards Gabby because he was reminded of his sister.

also, that's a great (if large) selection of movies. i have to vouch for Tangled, as that's one of my favorite movies as well. but we love the representation for "girls whose favorite movies are all animated." i hope she also knows nothing about live action classics, just like me <3

[observatoiredumensonge]

QUE FERA LE MONDE DÉMOCRATIQUE FACE À SON ISLAMISATION ?

Ne vous détournez surtout pas de la signification de ce nouveau statut qui tend à s’incruster dans notre subconscient.

Temps de lecture = 6 minutes En fait, c’est le monde démocratique qui bascule partout et qui s’amuse à se bander les yeux face à sa lente substitution en théocratie islamique. Par Thérèse Zrihen-Dvir Continue reading QUE FERA LE MONDE DÉMOCRATIQUE FACE À SON ISLAMISATION ?

[carewyncromwell]

"How can I protect you, boy, unless you always stay in here...away in here...?"

x~x~x~x

HAPPY HALLOWEEN, ALL! To complete my Cromwell Clan entries to my "Halloween animated character costume" prompt for the year, here is the main villain of Carewyn's storyline -- her cruel and cold grandfather, Charles Cromwell -- as my personal choice for the most evil Disney villain ever created: Judge Claude Frollo from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame!

The Hunchback of Notre Dame was and remains one of my favorite animated movies of all time, even despite its flaws. It really cemented a love and appreciation for classical and church music in me that had already existed in my mother since she was a kid, and our shared love of its soundtrack therefore also became something we've bonded over. My mum and I even went to go see the stage production together during its short-lived run in La Jolla, California, back in 2014 (and got way too emotional just hearing this gorgeous music live -- seriously, Bells of Notre Dame alone nearly left us in tears). And yeah, part of my love for this movie that doesn't involve its score comes from its characters, especially protagonists Quasi and Esmeralda and the most detestable Disney villain ever conceived, Frollo. Ironically enough, upon rewatching the movie with my mother again earlier this year, I realized that this guy had probably affected my development of Charles Cromwell at least on a subconscious level, so when coming up with a Halloween costume for this monster in human skin, it truly was a no-brainer. Charles couldn't possibly be dressed as anyone other than Judge Frollo. And as much as old men will probably always be hard for me to draw, I don't think he turned out as badly as I'd expected. XD

Have a lovely spooky day, everyone!! Much love!! xoxo 🎃

[wakeup-program-fr]

Welcome to the Wake up Program

Vous vous sentez perdu ? Vide ? Observé ? Seul(e) ? Bizarre ? Nous sommes là pour vous !

Notre équipe travaille sur l'étude de la capacité à programmer notre subconscient pour nous amener dans une nouvelle réalité. Certaines personnes restent bloquées dans cette nouvelle réalité, ce qui est extrêmement mauvais pour leur santé physique et morale, et c'est pour cela que nous sommes là, pour vous aider à retrouver vos esprits. Certains décrivent cela comme un "rêve vivant", d'autres comme un "horrible cauchemar vivant", et c'est ce dernier qui nous intéresse. Racontez-nous votre rêve et nous vous aiderons à vous réveiller.

On peut être dans une autre réalité, sans le vouloir. Nous avons déduit que ces passages dans une autre réalité ne sont que des crises de déréalisation, mais nos sujets sont certains qu'il s'agit de quelque chose de beaucoup plus effrayant.

Symptômes potentiels :

Sensation de vide

Sensation de vertige

Picotements dans tout le corps, en particulier dans les mains

Maux de tête

nausées

Hallucinations visuelles/auditives/cénesthésiques

Vision floue

Points noirs dans le champ de vision

Sentiment de ne pas être réel

Envoyez-nous un message sur "Posez-moi une question" (anonyme ou non) pour nous raconter votre rêve. Apportez-nous le plus de détails possible sur votre rêve et quelques informations sur votre état psychique et physique (carences, troubles alimentaires, traumatismes, troubles psychiques, etc.) afin que nous puissions vous aider au mieux.

C'est juste un rêve, réveillez-vous. ꒰ঌ👁໒꒱

suivez le #wake up program pour aider les gens à se réveiller

Aucune information confidentielle (vos rêves, votre prénom, vos pronoms, votre âge, etc.) ne sera partagée avec autrui. Votre vie privée restera privée 👁.

[lukas-dark-miracles]

Lukas' Inspiration|| His big three "Songs"

This is just a little take on the big three astrological signs (Sun, Moon, and Rising Signs) as if they were Songs. Below the Cut is why each song was picked. TW: Implied Drug Use / Drug Abuse, Wrspice

Sun Song: Heaven - The Neighborhood Tw implied Drug Use/ Abuse

"The sun is your identity. It is the essence that you shine out into the world. It represents the vital force that drives you to seek the highest expression of your true self. Your sun sign is how you answer the question “I am” and how you experience life and express your individuality(x) " Lukas identity is really tied up with being a worshiper, both literally in being religious, and figuratively as needing someone or something to believe in. He is, in many ways, defined in who he is to other people and doesn't have a strong sense of what he believes in without that reflection. He has to place that trust elsewhere, and when he can't he dissolves. Lyrics:

When I feel like I'm strangled You treat me like an angel Show me all different angles And I never, ever felt that way, no When you leave, I don't wanna try And if you stick with me, I'll be fine 'Cause your love's rubbing off on me Tell me, how'd you get so heavenly? There's something 'bout you, baby There's nothing like the way ya get me high You've got a heart from heaven, but you're burning like hell

Moon Song: Devils in the Backseat - Lostboycrow Tw: wrspice

"The moon is the soul behind your identity. It is the subconscious side of yourself that you typically keep hidden and is the driving force behind your emotional reactions. Your moon sign helps you feel pleasure and pain, joy and sorrow, and gives insight into how you nurture and restore yourself. (x)" Lukas desperately wants to be wanted and loved, meaning he will do whatever he can to get that. He'll distort himself if it means that whoever around him will see him as an important figure in his life. It's something he's not proud of, and it's something he tries so desperately hide usually under the guise that he is already important. It inherently keeps distance between him and others because he doesn't trust others, even when he wants their attention. Hence him being superficial a lot of times. Lyrics: I want to feel alive Devil's in the backseat You were up front looking at me with those hazel eyes Riding with my hand on your lap Sing baby don't you ask me Cause I can only feed you lies Devil's got a hold and we're laughing You don't even know me but you're calling me daddy I'm running on red through the canyon Singing I'm a bad man, bad man

Rising Song: Notre Dame - Paris Paloma

"Rising sign(also known as your Ascendant) is your social personality. It is how you dawn on people as it relates to the zodiac sign that was on the Eastern horizon when you were born. Your rising sign represents your physical body and outward style (x)" Lukas shows a lot his caring and empathetic nature to people. It's part of the reason people trust him, is that he gives and doesn't seem to take, even if he actually does. He wants to be important to people, even if he ultimately knows he is now othered. It's why people might feel safe, if not off put by the man that seems to share very little of himself but expects to know a lot of them. Lyrics:

I'm not immune to the sincerity below me, makes me feel, it makes me holy But the tears I understand that I do not below No I do not belong Watching the figures, all the saints, but mostly sinners come and go And some are desperate, but the others have the sense that they do belong And I do not belong Some only talk towards the heavens when the end is feeling desperate Have the overwhelming feeling That there's nobody who's looking down At least I'm looking down

[tricycle-jaune]

j'pense y'a un truc qui fait que j'sois autant active rpgiquement parlant en ce moment.

l'actualité.

ce qui se passe dans le monde en ce moment est d'une tragédie sans précédent, je pensais pas que de mon vivant (personne je pense...) j'assisterais à un génocide comme on en lit dans les livres d'histoire, et dans la miséricorde de Dieu j'ai la chance inouïe de n'être "que" spectatrice car vivant dans un pays occidental, du coup je vois ça avec un regard extérieur toute une population qui continue à se faire massacrer, une population qui ont les mêmes convictions religieuses que moi, et moi j'suis là à prendre mon p'tit déjà devant mon ordi à témoigner d'images de catastrophes et des paroles de haine d'autres personnes qui disent clairement mot pour mot "qu'il faut tuer tous les arabes de cette terre" voilà voilà, this is our world.

rien à voir mais matthew perry is dead, et la vérité, c'est un des symboles de l'humour télévisuel qui part avec lui, même s'il restera toujours THE figure, et j'pense le personnage préféré masculin de friends de bcp d'entre nous.

du coup pour palier à toutes ces tragédies, j'me suis enfermée dans mes personnages mais là, j'en ai cinq en route ?? ça m'étais jamais arrivée, et le pire c'est que j'ai de l'inspi pour les CINQ genre, où on va, bah je pense savoir ; je pense que je vis à travers eux, clairement, et pas in real life, ce qui posera problème éventuellement parce que la vrai vie ça prend du temps mine de rien, et je pourrais pas le consacrer entièrement à faire vivre CINQ perso en substitution de la mienne. Et celleux qui font du rp SAVENT qu'en plus qu'on on créé un perso, on met TELLEMENT du sien, la vérité y'a un bout de moi dans chacun et chacune d'entre eux/elle.

bref, je m'embarque pour de nouvelles terres qui sont loin, mais LOIN de la nôtre, et je pense que c'est un moyen que mon subconscient a trouvé pour pas que je perde la boule face à notre monde, du coup je vais continuer quitte à m'en piquer les yeux à force de rester devant l'ordi, j'aurai les yeux rouges mais le mental à peu près correct donc en vrai c'est rentable mdrrr

peace et love sur vous.

[el-mira-d-or]

L'inconscient répond à l'habitude, c'est pourquoi, il faut étudier l'origine de la formation de nos habitudes afin d'appréhender notre propre subconscient, qui nous parle lui-même, de ce qui préoccupe notre inconscient.

Contrairement à ce que l'on pourrait penser, nos habitudes sont d'abord issues de notre langue maternelle.

C'est ainsi que nous nous exprimons par habitude et que les mots que nous utilisons ne viennent pas au hasard mais sont le fruit de nos habitudes en matière de langage.

À ce propos, il est intéressant de noter qu'il existe des habitudes universelles, comme le fait de saluer l'autre personne, ou le fait de remercier et qu'il existe des habitudes davantage latines et des habitudes davantage anglophones, mais c'est également vrai pour toutes les autres langues ou groupes de langues, qui ont toutes développées des habitudes spécifiques et des habitudes communes.

Évidemment, il est nécessaire de mentionner le poids des traditions qui jouent un rôle majeur dans la transmission des habitudes, à travers les rituels et les dogmes.

Les traditions, dans leur ensemble, produisent les religions et les superstitions : lorsqu'elles se trouvent réunifiées, nous les nommons par le terme de La Tradition.

La Tradition s'accapare notre langue maternelle afin de définir les bornes de ce qui est bon et de ce qui est mauvais. Elle produit ainsi un système philosophique basé sur la dualité, du bien contre le mal.

La vérité, c'est que lorsque nous regardons la Nature, nous ne pouvons affirmer que ce qui s'y produit est bon ou mauvais, mais nous disons que c'est dans l'ordre des choses.

C'est ainsi, que le fait de se libérer du système philosophique dans lequel nous avons été élevé, afin de se mettre en état de communion avec la Nature, délivre une connaissance nouvelle : celle de l'inexistence du bien et du mal, qui ne sont, en fait, que des concepts enfantins servant à élever l'humanité adolescente.

Il y a un ordre qui existe : l'ordre du Cosmos ; et sur Terre, cet ordre est celui de la Nature.

La transmission des concepts du bien et du mal reste une erreur car il serait préférable d'effectuer un rapprochement avec la Nature afin de prodiguer une éducation profitable aux enfants : basée sur la hiérarchie coopérante.

La Tradition, dans ses multiples formes, forge nos habitudes : nous sommes ainsi poussés par notre propre subconscient vers l'idéal du Sage, ou tout au contraire, vers la déchéance de l'impie, et nous voguons finalement entre les deux, comme nous ne savons ni être entièrement bon, ni être entièrement mauvais.

En vérité, nous agissons d'abord par habitude, puis par mimétisme, c'est pourquoi, nous sommes constamment ramenés vers ce que nous avons fait hier, reproduisant les mêmes gestes, ou alors vers ce qui nous rend sociables, en nous conformant à la gestuelle de l'autre.

Nos habitudes se voient au travers de tous nos petits gestes mais elles dépendent surtout des circonstances et de notre volonté propre.

L'habitude produit le manque car c'est bien parce que nous sommes accoutumés à un produit, à un objet ou à une présence, que nous ressentons comme un manque lorsque la situation ne nous permet pas de satisfaire à notre habitude.

L'inconscient est borné par des limites prédéfinis parce qu'il ne sait voir qu'en fonction de notre propre expérience, qui se définit par notre propre passé, dans lequel, il faut inclure la transmission des bornes sociales et morales, à travers l'éducation que nous avons eu et par le biais de notre obéissance aux règles et aux lois.

Nous avons l'habitude d'être vertueux ou l'habitude d'être vicieux, mais cependant, les circonstances, ainsi que les personnes que nous côtoyons jouent un grand rôle dans notre manière de nous adapter à une situation donnée.

Ainsi, il existe nombre de vertueux qui ne le sont qu'en présence de certaines personnes, et il existe nombre de vicieux qui s'adonnent aux vices par mimétisme et qui obéissent donc à leurs propres subconscients. Il est, en effet, assez aisé de se rendre compte que la voix du tentateur qui parle comme le serpent de la Genèse, passe directement par notre subconscient. C'est ainsi, que celui-ci s'oppose à la morale, aux règles et aux limites nous poussant à aller au-delà de ce que nous connaissons.

N'ayons pas peur de celui-ci car il s'avère peureux dès lors que l'on devient capable d'aller au-delà de ce qu'il peut nous proposer...

Nous avons de bonnes et de mauvaises habitudes : les bonnes habitudes sont celles qui nous élèvent tandis que les mauvaises sont celles qui nous rabaissent. Il faut cependant se garder de juger les habitudes des autres car la diversité est un moyen d'expression de la Nature et que chacun de nous est unique.

Enfin, nous affirmons qu'il faut se méfier des habitudes de notre propre subconscient, particulièrement, si nous avons l'habitude de râler, ou de pester, l'habitude qui produit une accoutumance, l'habitude de perdre, ou l'habitude de détruire ce que nous avons créé.

Il faut nécessairement faire preuve d'introspection afin de se rendre compte que ce sont précisément ces habitudes du subconscient qui sont à l'origine d'une vie désagréable.

C'est ainsi que, faisant preuve de volonté, nous parvenons à bousculer nos habitudes afin qu'elles deviennent l'objet de notre propre élévation.

El Mira d'or

Philosophie : Les habitudes inconscientes.