#Names We Call Home

[freyadragonlord]

How do I explain how married Han Yoojin and Sung Hyunje are in the post-epilogue Side Stories without sounding like I am exaggerating or making things up...

[tinfoil-jones]

Gravity Falls: For Your Own Good, Ch. 4

Summary: A few years after moving to Gravity Falls and having his lab built, Stanford Pines happens upon his estranged twin brother, Stanley. He mentally prepared himself to be suffocated by his brothers neediness all over again - what he wasn't prepared for was Stanley walking right past him like he didn't even notice him.

Rating: M for language, violence, and adult implications

Preface: Dialogue only, but some actions will be annotated for clarity. Cross-Posted on AO3 Here

First - Prev - Next

CH.4

"If we’re going to get to the pit of this peach we gotta get some variables outta the way first. I need a scan of his brain and yours. While conscious.”

“Mine as well?”

“You said he’s your identical twin - he should be genetically the same as you. We can use a scan of your brain as a comparison to see if there’s physical damage on the organ itself, because brain damage is the most common cause of amnesia.”

“I do have the technology available for an in-depth scan, but… ”

 “But what?”

“It’s in the shape of a ray gun, but like a traditional MRI whoever is getting scanned has to stay completely still.”

“I don’t s’pose in the time it took me to go into town and get supplies, you managed to reconcile with him?”

“Reconcile? He’s still convinced I’m a mad scientist out to harvest his organs, 'or worse turn him over to the IRS'- don’t ask about that second part. If I point anything gun-shaped at him, he’ll freak out.”

“Can’t say I blame him…”

“Hush, Fiddleford. There’s an easy way we can get him to hold still.”

“Stanford- Stanford put the tranquilizing doohickey away. We both know that concoction of yours wasn’t formulated with humans in mind. Surely you have less caustic means of sedation.”

---

“Stanford, anyone can tell that bottle’s been tampered with.”

“I have a theory that this persona of his is so self-destructive he’ll still drink it.”

“Y’know, this bottled water tastes suspiciously like two crushed Ambien tablets.” 

*Stan keeps drinking it anyways*  

“I am impressed, but I also hate that your theory was correct.”

*Ford undeafens the cell*

“Stanley, if you think there’s zolpidem in that, why are you still drinking it?”

“You think two Ambien is enough to take me down? Guess again, I’ve used this stuff to cut coke. You’re gonna have to try harder than that, PhD.” 

“Hmm, so we should have used Coca-Cola instead of water…”

“That ain’t what he meant by- how did you survive by yourself out here?”

---

“Hello there …Stan?”

“Sup babe.”

“Don’t call me that. I was wondering - you’re so handsome already, but it’d surely tickle my fancy a bit more if you put on this here necktie.”

“Hell no.”

“Do you not know how to tie one? I’d be happy to-.”

“I know how to tie a tie, specs. But I’ll never wear a necktie ever again. Not after Colombia… I still can’t shave that part of my jaw without nightmares.”

“I beg your pardon?”

---

“I couldn’t convince him to put the mind control tie on.”

“Fiddleford, why are you staring a thousand yards away?”

“He was explaining to me his time in Colombian prison, then he went on a tangent about necklaces and now I don’t think I can change a tire without thinking about it ever again.”

“... Interesting. We’re not resorting to the tranq gun yet?”

“This is your own brother you’re talking about.” 

“There’s only one thing we can do. The only thing that will 99.99% work on my brother. I didn’t think it would have to come to this so soon. But it’s our only unharmful option left.”

---

“Stanley.”

“Doc.”

“I will give you twenty dollars if you stay still for thirty whole seconds.”

“On one hand this is a set up… On the other hand, I’ve done worse for twenty dollars.”

“You what ?”

“Ten bucks up front.”

To be continued...

[hijinxinprogress]

Coffee addict Never sleeps Tim drake ❌ 

Solving cases in his sleep off 87 energy drinks Tim Drake ✅

The coffee addict never sleeps perpetually tired Tim Drake thing is a widely accepted headcanon however that was elementary school tim but after he stayed up for a week straight subsisting entirely on coffee to decipher the bat weekly patrol schedule and how it aligns with rogue attacks/Arkham breakouts, he crashed then when he woke up it was fucking wednesday so he missed his chance to commemorate his discovery with pictures of Robin and he decided that shit would never happen again and made himself an ‘efficient’ sleep schedule so he could run around doing fuck shit, add to his robin shrine, and stay on honor roll bc he was even more pissed to see the gotham gazette had pictures of Robin with an on site interview credited to Vicki Vale (listen bowl cut tim had a one sided beef with vicki vale that included tim judging who gets better pics of the bats but she isn’t even aware that she’s competing with a whole ass child 😭 he’s sitting at the table with a mug of orange juice and looks at the newspaper snorts and goes ‘fucking amateur I could do better’) 

Regularly unsupervised tiny businessman in training Tim ‘Ten hours of uninterrupted sleep?? That’s so inefficient not to mention fucking stupid’ Drake is so pissed he missed getting shots of Robin dropkicking a rogue from 6 six stories up (for absolutely no reason dick just thinks it’s fun) that he just takes at least 3 hour naps every eight hours 😭 he refuses to spend almost half a day sleeping ‘for no reason when he could be doing something productive’ 

And he still does this as a bat but it’s just easier to tell if he didn’t take his nap bc he has less than zero impulse control and he’s just fucking done with everything like the gcpd is terrified bc tim’s saying shit like ‘This guys a fucking moron, I could’ve done this in half the time without killing anyone fucking loser doesn’t he know if you keep them alive you can prolong the torture?’ and ‘you’re like all hysterical and for what 🤨 ‘you blew up 83% of Bristol waah’ stfu and fucking rebuild it?? It’s only rich mfs that live there, it’s just a matter of them opening their fucking wallets’ once a new recruit made the mistake of asking if robin had adult supervision regularly and Tim responded with ‘well if you’re gonna snitch to cps like a little bitch then yeah’ and that cop did snitch so tim fucking doxxed him

Yj has just accepted that sometimes they will find tim in an air vent, on the roof, in one of their closets, or something just fucking knocked out then an alarm will go off and he’ll just get up like nothing happened but for the first couple of months they were probably concerned bc ‘I’ve never seen you sleep?? wtf are you on man’ and Tim’s confused bc ‘I slept next to you this morning wdym??’ and that’s how yj discovers tim sleeps with his eyes open

But one of the worst things about Tim’s ‘time efficient sleep schedule’ nonsense is that it fucking works he’s one of the most well rested and coherent bats even after back to back Arkham breakouts however the absolute worst thing about his sleep schedule is the likelihood of going into the cave and seeing tim staring in a daze but wide eyed yet somehow never blinking at the batcomputer with 57 tabs open on top of being unresponsive and thinking he has a fucking concussion or he’s been replaced but he’s just doing case work while muttering nonsense in his fucking sleep for some reason

[batcavescolony]

Why do people keep saying they want Agatha to adopt Billy or that Billy is a motherless child or that Agatha is Billy's new mom.... Y'all he says Rebecca is his mom, canonically in the show. Agatha isn't his mom.

[scotty-nobody]

I am getting kitty!!!

[mango-mya]

Yes that's Shakespeare please leave me alone

[mc-critical]

1.01 / 2.17 (41)

[inkedbydave]

On Today's Blog: My cat and his name

Here's my cat, his name is "Kökény" which means "Blackthorn" in hungarian :3

Yes, he was absolutely named after the Blackthorns, since my parents didn't let me name him Ty he became blackthorn in our native language

[firetruckfolks]

Kick Your Limey...

for @118dailydrabble Day Eleven: Viral | Buck & Bobby & Brad, post 8x07

Bobby continued to knead, wondering where Buck was. He had asked for Bobby’s Rugelach recipe… one of the many he had begged for since his breakup with Tommy. 

Well, whatever got him through, right? 

“Bobby!” 

Speak of the devil. Bobby turned, only for his mood to instantly sour when he saw who was with Buck.

“He’s helping me recreate your big viral moment,” Buck practically chirped, shooting Bobby a million dollar megawatt smile. 

“Kids a natural, he sounds like a real Brit!” Brad exclaimed, clapping Buck on the shoulder, “You have a star in the making here, Bob.” 

“That’s one word to describe Buck,” Bobby grumbled, walking away from the pair and abandoning his dough in the mixer.

[plumbbobtoggle]

Household 3/20: The Dars

Saeed Dar Senator Atheer Dar's son, Chief Administrative Officer for Elsewhere Township, family man Adam Dar, né McClain Saeed's husband, staff writer at The Brindleton Herald, breakfast food and children's poetry enthusiast Frances Dar Adam and Saeed's daughter, student at Elsewhere Elementary, avid reader Bella family's cocker spaniel

[maxbytes]

okay well that was stupid

[moonchild-in-blue]

Oh mother, tell your children Not to do what I have done Spend your lives in sin and misery In the house of The Rising Sun

[omg-snakes]

How does the narrow face affect the chance of that snake’s survival? Or is it just an indicator of probable other defects?

It's pretty bad and I'm not sure if he'll be able to eat. He emerged fully so I was able to get a better look at what's going on.

His bottom jaw is reduced and twisted. He can open his mouth but it looks like his glottis is very narrow, too, and pushed close to the front of his mouth. His trachea may be pinched. The quadrate and/or supratemporal portions of his skull (top back) are also deformed and jut out slightly.

There may be other defects at play. I know it's a boy because his hemipenes are currently everted, which is not normal. He did manage to absorb his yolk, but his navel is not fully sealed shut. He's not kinked, though, and he moves normally so we'll see if his condition improves and if he's able to eat once he's completed a neonatal shed.

He reminds me of an Italian greyhound with a severe overbite. I'm going to call him Iggy, which is the most common name for that particular dog breed.

[julie-su]

BLAST MAN HAS BEEN CLAIMED BY ALL OF SOMERSET 🐲🎆🍎

[the-kestrels-feather]

Donna Noble is out here threatening homicidal maniac aliens because they were disrespectful to her daughter, meanwhile my mom won't even change my contact in her phone to my proper name.

[daughterofsarenrae]

Absolutely horrible timing for me to acquire a fish but look at him. I couldnt just leave him for some dumbass customer to chuck him in a tiny shitty unheated tank. Meet Kal (better pics to come later hopefully)