#My strange addiction: giving literally everyone and anyone angst

[greeneyeofenvy]

Cassandra vole angst coming up

This is a very rough sketch I made last night. Ofc it’s mitski bc yeah.

@as-thra bc u said u wanted the Cassie lore. All I know for now (thanks to my weird ideas): she looks adorable and sassy as a kid, strict family and ofc a dementor purely bc it fit the “honey what’d you take, what’d you take?” Line.

[jawritter]

Request: May I request a Dean Winchester x plus size reader where the reader is very shy and she at a bar and some dirt bags are picking on her about her shortness and weight and dean stands up for her? Some smut and fluff ?? Also want to say you are a bop of a writer my love! ✨💕🥰❤️

Word Count: 2961

Warnings: Some angst I guess, language, hint of insecure reader, mean drunks at bar, SMUT, unprotected smut, oral (female receiving), I think that’s about it...

A/N: As always all mistakes are mine! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! Hope you all enjoy this one!!

Want more? Check out my masterlist!!

**MASTERLIST**

You had no idea why you agreed to come out again with Dean and Sam tonight.

It was always the same.... 

Dean would find him a little whore to spend his night with, and Sam would either find himself something to blow off some steam with, or sit at his laptop looking for another case to keep them busy with, because you all seemed addicted to the hunt as much as the next guy, and you were all at your best when you were killing things that shouldn't be allowed to exist. And you would sit alone at the bar, miserable, and avoiding other human contact as much  as possible.

It's what you expected anyway.

So when Dean threw baby into park you were out of the car, and heading into the bar without so much as looking at the brothers. Heading straight for the bar to order the strongest whatever they had. 

If you had to go home alone tonight, you'd at least get drunk enough to sleep without the nightmares.

To your surprise though Dean came, and slipped onto the barstool next to you, ordering a shot and a beer for the both of you before you could even get the bartender's attention. You looked at him strangely, and he caught it before you could even fix your face.

"What?" He asked you, as he threw back the shot the bartender slipped to him. Green eyes dancing with mischief as he looked at you.

"You're not going to start looking for tonight's lucky lady?" You asked him, and he chuckled a little next to you. 

"Na, not tonight." He said, brushing off your concern as he pulled his beer bottle to his perfect lips, and took a long deep drink.

"Think I'd rather hang out with you." He said, giving you a wink that, even though you'd never admit to anyone, made your knees weak. 

Dean had always had a soft spot in your heart, but you were too shy to ever admit to him that you had a crush on him, and plus he was way out of your league.

He was tall, strong, and gorgeous.

You were overweight, with more than a few extra pounds in places that made you feel self conscious on your best day, and to top it off you were short. Barely breaking 4'9. 

Sam often teased you that you still legally should be riding in a car seat. 

Dean never really teased you all that much about your height or your weight, sure he still teased you, but he had enough common sense to know what seemed to get under your skin, and he respectfully avoided any topic that made you uncomfortable.

Dean had just ordered the drinks when two guys came up, and sat down on the oposite side of you, The large, stupid, and obviously drunk one that smelled strongly of whiskey leered at you like your very presents disgusted him to his utter core. 

"Hey Roy?" The large smelly guy that honestly looked like his name could have been Lurch said to the much smaller guy that was just as drunk, maybe more so than he was sitting beside him. "When the fuck did they start letting whales into the bar? This one looks like she should be in a display take at the aquarium. Better call PETA and tell them they're missing their prized whale!" Lurch slurred, and Roy burst into a fit of laughter. 

You tried to make yourself as small as you could on your stool, trying to not even look at these two dirt bags that seemed to be sent by Crowley himself to torment you, Dean hadn't heard them because the music was so loud, and he was busy paying for your drinks, but when he turned he noticed the red sheen of your checks and furrowed his eyebrows at you questioningly. 

"What's wrong Y/N/N?" He asks, handing you a beer, and turning to face you fully.

He didn't have long to be confused, because before you could even answer Lurch spoke up again.

"Oh don't tell me you're trying to get with him Shammo, he's way out of your league!" Roy fell into another fit of laughter, and you looked down at your beer bottle, a tear slipping past your defenses in spite of yourself. 

Dean said nothing just got up from his bar stool and went over to stand in front of Lurch, a look of pure murder on his face, one that reminded you of his Demon days when Sam had dragged him back into the bunker and cured him.

"What's wrong pretty boy?" Lurch said, and that was all it took. Dean swung, landing a hit right to his jaw, knocking him cold off of the bar stool. 

Roy took off running towards the exit as fast as he could. Leaving his fat, smelly friend on the ground in front of Dean. 

Dean turned around to you, cupping your face in his hands, and looking you over. "You okay sweetheart?" He asks you, genuinely concerned. 

You were humiliated, embarrassed, and you could literally feel the whole bar staring at the three of you, seeing as Sam joined Dean on his left side, taking a look at Lurch still laying on the ground groaning.

"I'm fine Dean." You said, trying to pull away from him, but he wouldn't let you, instead he laced your hand in his, gave Lurch there another kick with his steel toe boot clad foot, started toward the exit with you in tow,  Sam said nothing, just followed along like this was nothing, but a normal Saturday night for Dean.

Dean opened the back seat door for you, and you climbed in. Grateful to be away from those two idiots, and that grimmy ass bar that seemed to be full of douchebags, Sam got in along with Dean, and the three of you made a short, but silent drive back to the bunker. 

You felt horrible. You felt bad that you were the reason Dean caused a scene at the bar, you felt bad that Sam and Dean didn't get to blow off steam like they had wanted to after a long hunt, and you felt bad that once again, you didn't seem to measure up enough. 

Lurch wasn't wrong. You have always been a little overweight, shy, and you are definitely short. That was just stating the obvious. Even though it did bother you, what bothered you even more than that was he was right about one thing for sure. Dean was out of your league, and even an idiot like that could tell it.

You did everything you could not to burst into tears in the back seat of the car, and ignoring the pair of green eyes that were shifting constantly from the road to the back seat, and when mercifully Dean pulled up into the Bunker's garage, you were out of the car before he could even put it in park and heading towards your room. 

You couldn't face Dean, and you didn't feel like an awkward 'chin up' talk from Sam that he would try to do. You just wanted to go to your room and cry.

Alone....

Which is apparently all you would ever be...

Alone....

You weren't in your room long before a light knock sounded through the mostly quiet room.

"Sweetheart? Can I come in?" Dean said softly. When you didn't answer him, and just continued to stare at the wall he let himself in, closing your door behind him. Slipping on the bed behind you, the bed dipping under his weight slightly.

You thought if you just ignored him he'd go away, but Dean was persistent, and your silence only made him more persistent. So he slipped under the covers behind you, and like he had every right to be there, slipping his arm around you, pulling your back to his strong chest. 

"Don't worry about what those dicks said y/n/n. Those drunk ass wipes wouldn't know what a real woman was if one walked up, and slapped them in the face." Dean said, running his fingers through your hair. 

Dean had never been this close to you before. Usually he would just knock at your door and tell you that dinner was ready, or that they had another case. Every once in a while he would ask you come watch a movie in the Dean cave with him, but never had he been this....intimate... with you, and it had your heart fluttering in your chest in spite of the tears that you were trying to wipe away from your face before Dean could see them.

"It's okay Dean," You said, ignoring the way you hated your voice after you'd been crying. "It's not like I'm not used to it. Men do that shit to me all the time, always have, that's why I don't go out with you guys very often, and it's not like what he said wasn't true." 

Dean huffed in frustration, wrapping his arm around you tighter, and then flipping you over quickly to face him as if you weighed nothing at all. Surprising you for a moment. His piercing green eyes stared into yours. Softer than you had ever seen them. Those little lines that you loved so much showing more today than they usually did.

"Baby girl NOTHING those dicks said at that bar was true, Sam told me he heard what they said to you, and was making his way over there when I turned around and noticed them. Your are not fat, you don't belong in an aquarium, those idiots were just pissed because they thought that you were with me, and some people are just so fucking misserable with their own lives that they try and do everything that they can in order to make everyone else as misserable as they are."

Dean brushed your check with his thumb. Wiping away stray tears that were still falling down your face.

"Your beautiful, your smart, you funny, you put up with our shit like no one else has even been able to before, you are not fat, your perfect, your a woman, your curves make you even more beautiful, just because your short doesn't mean shit. You could still kick my ass if you wanted to, and I've seen you take out freaks twice your size." Leaning down before you could say anything else Dean brushed his lips softly over yours, before capturing your lips in his, his mouth dominating yours quickly, his tongue sliding through your lips and gliding over your tongue in a slow but building give and take that had your toes curling. His strong arms wrapped around you, holding you tight against him, rolling you over as if it were nothing, hovering on top of you.  Breaking the kiss and leaving you breathless.

"Dean.."

"Shush." He said, putting a finger to your lips. Let me show you just how fucking gorgeous you are to me.

You sat there in wide eyed in disbelief at the man smirking above you as he sat up just long enough to rid himself of his top layers of clothing, then quickly coming back down to hover over you. Placing chaste kissing to your lips and all over your face. Making you giggle and blush all at the same time.

Dean's lips found yours in a deep, needy, passionate kiss, as his hands explored your body, riding you of your clothing as he went. Only breaking the kiss long enough to pull your shirt from your body, and throw it on the floor with all the rest of your clothes. Leaving you in just your bra, which he made quick work of getting rid of. 

Every little touch, every little trail his fingers made over your skin seemed to wake up something deep inside of you that you had never experienced before. A need, a burning fire, one that started as a smolder, but was quickly bringing to burn out of control.

The way his tongue danced with yours, the way his hands lingered on your thighs longer than most men you had been with ever did. The way he worshiped your body, trailing kisses over your stomach and between the valley of your beast. Teasing you as before finally coming up to take your nipples into his mouth, giving each the same attention until you were arching your back to get close to him. His hands never left your body.

All the insecurities, and the mean words you had heard all your life seemed to finally be melting away. Dean treated you like you were some precious treasure to him. He never said anything about your thighs being too thick, or your stomach not being flat and perfect.

His green eyes were hooded and dark with lust like you were the most beautiful thing he'd ever laid eyes on.

Sliding down your body, never making eye contact with you, throwing your legs over his broad shoulders he all but growled at your glistening folds exposed to him. 

"So fucking perfect baby." He said, his voice deep and thick, making a deep shutter run down your spin before he ran his tongue through your slick folds. A deep moan fell from your lips as he growled deep in his throat. 

"Fuck sweetheart." He said, before devowering your sex like a starving man having his last mean, and God did the man know what the fuck he was doing. Most men didn't bother to go down on you, they were only worried about getting themselves off and leaving, Dean though, Dean seemed intent on making you cum before he even got started.

Your legs trembling at every lick and suck of his sinful mouth hand you all but panting above him. That familiar burn building in your abdomen. The coil threatened to snap, and when he added two thick fingers into you and curled them, hitting that spot most men never found perfectly, that was it. You fell apart around him. Your walls clinch down on his fingers. 

Dean slowed his administrations, but didn't stop. Working you through your release and lapping up everything you had to give him.

When  Dean finally crawled up your body and hovered over you, his thick leaking erection lay heavy against your inner thigh as he rutted himself against you, desperately needing some sort of friction.

"You okay baby girl." He asked, and you nodded before he began peppering your face with little kisses before his lips found yours again. When he was sure you were ready and your hands started to explore his large shoulders and back he made himself ready at your dripping entrance.  Sliding himself in slowly. Stretching you and filling with inch by glorious inch. When he was finally fully seated inside your tight heat he burned his head in your shoulder, kissing your neck and nibbling on your skin there, making your walls clench around him and he hadn't even started moving yet. 

A deep moan falling from his lips as your walls fluttered around him. He stayed still until you rolled your hips against him. Letting him know  you were ready for him to move. 

Pulling himself almost all the way out of you before sliding back in. Setting a deep steady rhythm. His tip hitting that same spot deep inside of you over and over again, and the drag of his manhood over your silk walls had both of you barrelling towards your end before you knew what was happening. Every time he was fully seated inside you a deep moan would fall from his lips. Sweat shining on skin in the dim light of your room as you held onto his shoulders, his body rocking into yours at the same slow, but deep pace. 

You could feel that familiar coil tightening again, and your walls were already fluttering around him. Dean seemed to be just as close as you, his hips beginning to stutter and his pace getting faster and more erratic.

His lips found yours again as he stilled deep inside of you, his warm seed coating your walls, throwing you over the edge with him, your walls clamping down around him as he swallowed your moans, slowly rocking his hips into yours, helping you both ride out your orgasms as long as possible until he finally stopped. Rolling off of you carefully,  and pulling you into his chest. His breaths still came in short bursts as his lips found the top of your forehead.

"You have no idea how long I wanted to do that." He said, his voice quiet and ragged from your previous activities.

You buried your face in his neck, not knowing what to say until he lifted your chin with his fingers again.

"Now I don't want my girl to ever get upset over what some dick bag says at a bar because he's never had a real woman in his life and doesn't get to see what I see. Your beautiful Y/N/N, and now your mine, there's not getting rid of me. I'm going to spend the rest of our lives, no matter how short they may be, showing you everyday just how gorgeous you really are." 

His lips found yours again in a kiss that made your toes curl, and his arms tightened their hold around you. 

You were his, something you never thought you would be, but yet here you were, safe and warm in his strong arms. 'His girl' as he kept calling you, telling you over and over again how beautiful you were, until you maybe, just maybe started to believe him yourself.....

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Tag List: @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @thecreatiivecorner​  @aflamboyanceofgays @deanwanddamons​​ @imabitch4jensen​​ @rvgrsbrns​​ @bi-danvers0​​ @onethirstyunicorn​​ @i-love-superhero​​ @akshi8278​ @alanegaming @magssteenkamp​ @lemondropirwin​ @squirrelnotsam​ @hobby27​ @spnbaby-67​ @mrsjenniferwinchester​ @defenderrosetyler​ 

[chanquill]

⋉ aмor odιѕѕe ⋊

aмor odιѕѕe; тнe love тo нaтe

A/N: yes. we’re PG in this household so no swears, only creative insults. those, and those only.

Pairing: Chan x Reader

Word Count: 1.8K

Warnings: none, but creative insults???

Rating: PG

Genre: Fluff, Angst

──── ･ ｡ﾟ���: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────

Everyone on campus always thought that you and Chan would make the cutest couple; the King and Queen of Clé University, but they also knew that you two weren’t on the best terms. The smug-faced rat in question was always right behind you, whether it be handing in assignments, test scores or even standing in queue. Whenever you turned around you felt those condescending eyes searing into your skin. “Ugh!” you exclaimed, ”JESUS CHRIST I WISH THAT COCKY LITTLE SWINE WOULD STOP IT. HE’S SO ANNOYING!”

Your best friend Jisung patted your shoulder and tried to reassure you, telling you that it was going to be okay and that it’ll all get better. “‘Sung, I swear there are a couple of screws that aren’t put in right in your head. What the hell are you on about I-“ Before you could finish your sentence, a hand cupped around your mouth from the back and muffled your cries. “WHAT THE- JISUNG, THIS ISN’T FUNNY!” you protested, peeling the hand off your face. As you turned around, you began to realise that the hand that cupped your face didn’t belong to Jisung, much to your dismay. It was the one person you really, really didn’t want to see at that moment. It was Chan, his trademark smirk plastered across his infuriatingly perfect face. You rolled your eyes in disgust and asked, “What?! What do you want now? Do you want me to fall at your feet and grovel? You want me to give you my notes?”

His smirk faltered a little, but returned to its original state as quickly as you had seen it waver. “Well, you see, I wanted to ask you something, but I can see that I’m not welcome right now (or at any other time actually) so...I’ll just...leave? Bye.” Sighing, you grabbed onto his hand with both of yours, pulling him back towards you and Jisung, who was still staring at you and Chan with his mouth open in disbelief. “Fine...FINE. Okay, fine I’ll hear you out. Just don’t pull another kidnapper move like that and you’ll be fine, okay?”

He took a deep breath and slipped his long, slender fingers out of yours, overworked and covered in plasters. “Um, so... basically...I uh... c-can we study together? I’m having t-trouble with this particular part of code and i’m not sure what’s wr-wrong with it. Can y-you help? Please?” The stuttering mess stood in front of you wasn’t the Chan you knew. The one you knew was the arrogant little son of a seahorse-faced cashew, fricking little- You sighed and stroked his hand. “Okay buddy, what’s up? Is this your idea of a joke? Why are you shaking; what happened? Talk to me.” This wasn’t usually you; you never cared about him, and you thought you never would, yet here you were, putting your arm around Chan’s shoulders, guiding him to the nearest bench. After sitting him down and ruffling his hair, you took your water bottle out of your bad and handed it to him. “Here, drink some water.” He grimaced and looked at you weird. “Really? A Bokémon waterbottle? We both know that Migimon is better, right?”

“Are you going to drink the water or not, huh?” you snapped, aware that he was right. Turning your head to face Jisung, you mouthed, “Go! I’ll find you later! GO!!” and shooed him away. “Um so...What did you need help with then?” you asked Chan, “Also did you write the code in Javascript or Python?” You looked back at Chan, not expecting his deep brown eyes, now filled with worry and warmth. He inched closer to you, returning your water bottle to your bag and sighed in relief. “T-thank you, y/n, and uh, I wrote the code in Python,” he mumbled, still occasionally stuttering and stumbling on his words. “Hm okay. Meet me at the library in an hour. I’m just going to drop my bags off at my place and I’ll be back, okay?” You were just getting up to leave when Chan grabbed your hand and pulled you back down, turning your head with one hand, while holding you down with the other. You knew he went to the gym regularly (unfortunately, you had encountered him enough times at the on-site gym to know), BUT BOY WAS HE STRONG. “Uhhhh...Chan?” you asked, unpleasantly surprised, “You need something?” With a puppy-like glint in his eye, he said, “Let me drop you off! Where do you live?” You were puzzled but...something felt wrong about turning him down, and as much as you wanted to refuse, your body somehow urged you to accept. “Fine, I guess...,” you trailed off, unaware of the events that were about to unfold.

————————————————————

As he drove up to the house, you slowly took off your seatbelt and slung your bag over your shoulder. “Give me 20...actually no, you can come in. You wanna come in?,” you asked, not too sure of what to expect. Chan nodded and grinned, a sight you were startled to see.

“Is he usually like this? Am I the one being mean? Oh my god. What if I’m the one being mean. Oh frick oh frick oh frick oh frick. Wait, hang on, AM I IMAGINING THINGS?! Deep breaths. In. Out. In. Out. C a l m. I am CALM. Wait but-“ you thought to yourself, trudging up the stairs to your apartment. You pulled a key out of your pocket and jammed it into the keyhole. “I- Wait, wait, I swear this was the right key. Hang on-“ This was not going well. Welp. Chan couldn’t hate you any more than he did already so... oh well. After jiggling the key around for a while, Chan offered to open door for you. With a strange mastery, Chan jammed the key into the hole and turned it while pushing it in. Click. “HANG ON A DAMN MINUTE- I’VE BEEN LIVING HERE FOR WHAT? OVER 8 MONTHS NOW? AND I CAN’T EVEN OPEN MY OWN DOOR??? BUT THIS GUY- FRICKING ALMOST 6 FOOT WORM- HE JUST MANAGED TO CLICK IT OPEN???” you wondered to yourself, trying to suppress a scream inside of you. He cracked a smile. “There, the door’s open now, just had to give it a little strength,” he proclaimed, “I’m happy to help any time.” With a humoured look on your face, you pushed Chan into the apartment and locked the door behind you. You threw yourself on the couch and sighed, you didn’t usually invite people in, especially not people you hated.

One of your roommates, Ryujin, walked in, drinking yet another bubble tea. You turned to face her and gave her a long, hard stare. “I swear you run on bubble tea and that’s not healthy, you know? I swear if you get diabetes from the amount of sugar you consume, I’m not coming to funeral because I warned you,” you sighed, massaging your temples. Ryujin stopped sipping on her tea and sauntered up to you, “Sir, whether I’m addicted to boba or not, I’m still the crazy (but cool) kid that you picked up in middle school. You’re never getting rid of me. Ever. And anyway, who’s this guy?” she asked, gesturing to Chan, “Your boyfriend? If so, damn girl, you have TASTE.” You and Chan blushed in unison and started muttering excuses. You stood up, still embarrassed, and stuttered put something along the lines of, “Y-yeah I’m going to go ch-change and I’ll be b-back, okay? Chan, you can sit down, ‘Jin, get him s-some water or juice or w-whatever.” You ran into your room, and quietly slammed the door behind you. “FKSJKDS SHIN RYUJIN YOU’VE REALLY DONE IT THIS TIME I- GAHHHH I CAN’T EVEN DENY THAT HE’S PRETTY- GOD FRICKING DAMN IT!” you thought to yourself, throwing on the closest set of comfortable clothes you could find.

Opening your door ever so slightly, you made eye contact with Ryujin and hissed at her to come over. From across the living room, she shrugged and made her way to you in the least inconspicuous way possible; ‘accidentally’ knocking over a lamp, tripping over Chan and almost spilling her tea. “Ryujin why would you- BRUH THAT’S NOT COOL! YOU DON’T JUST ASK US IF WE’RE TOGETHER! HE’S CHAN. AS IN THE GUY I HATE. YES, THAT GUY!” you exclaimed with an air of exasperation. “U-uh huh. Keep going, you aren’t fooling anyone. This. This is peak whipped behaviour. Face it, y/n, you have a lil pash. oOoOohHh THINK OF THE BLACKMAIL MATERIAL; THERE’S TEA TO LAST ME MONTHS, LITERALLY!” Ryujin made kissy faces and walked back into the kitchen after announcing that she was the official third wheel and no one, not even Lord Changbin himself, could stop her. And the worst part was that you knew deep, down inside, that you really had taken a liking to that raw salmon. Well, it was more of a pash. A strong pash.

You waved your hand and choked. “pSh, ‘Jin’s got nothing on me, I don’t have a small crush on THAT guy; hell, I don’t even like him as an acquaintance...maybe-“ You were confused but nonetheless walked out of your room with fake confidence.

————————————————————

Sitting down next to Chan, you pulled out your laptop from your bag, a pretty new Macbook, plastered with stickers of Stray Kids, a new and upcoming group that hadn’t debuted yet. Chan had a slight bewildered-but-shocked-but-proud expression on his face that was quickly wiped off as you told him to show you his code so far.

————————————————

Both you and Chan had spent hours and hours finishing the project, and it seemed as if it would never end, but at long last came a sigh of drained relief from Chan. He threw his laptop onto the cherry wood coffee table. And leant back into the sofa, a soft murmur of fatigue muttered. You stood up and glanced at the clock by the door, rubbing your eyes to make sure you hadn’t read it wrong; it was one in the morning. That’s right, you and your not-so-much-enemy-anymore had spent all night working on some code. Some stupid code. “Chan? It’s uh...it’s one am. And I’m pretty sure the dorms won’t be open now, and even if they were, I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t let you in, considering the grisly state you’re in, at the moment. I really would let you crash this one time, but uh, where would you sleep??? CHAN GET UPPPPPP!” you urged, a small part of begging him to stay. Brushing those thoughts away, you started stepping over Chan to get to your room, when he grabbed your hand pulled you back down. But not back to where you were sitting, oh no no no, he pulled you down to his lap. Wrapping his arm around you, he begged to stay the night. “We can stay like this forever, if you want to. Do you want you?” you joked. “Absolutely,” replied Chan, a slight beam coming across his face, “Good Night.”

──── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────

END.

A/N: hM yeah okay, i could’ve done better but y’know. i’m satisfied. thank you for reading!

[lycorogue]

LycoRogue’s Love Stories

It’s that time of year again where I shamelessly give a shout out to my own love stories that I have written for Miraculous Ladybug, Fruits Basket,  and “Hey, Arnold!” 

Check below the break for the full list. Alternatively, you can find my stories here on Tumblr under #LycoRogue Fanfic. I also have the same handle (LycoRogue) over on AO3, FFN, and DA.

Miraculous Ladybug Fandom

Peeping Tomcat Summary: Something called to Adrien, and before he knew it, he was addicted to sitting outside Marinette's window as Chat Noir; just watching her. His voyeuristic habit needs to stop, but things have gotten far too complicated now that he realizes he's growing a crush on her. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Standard Love Square leading into Pining Adrien and Reverse Crush Word Count: 84,242; multi-chapter *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Build Your Own Luck Summary: Everyone knows about the lucky charm bracelet that Marinette gave to Adrien, but where did Marinette get it in the first place? Why did Marinette have such faith in it? Perhaps Adrien got a bit more than luck when he accepted the bracelet. Perhaps he also got a taste of familial love. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Familial Love Word Count: 2581; one-shot [Tumblr]   [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Prescription for Love Summary: This was not the weekend away Kagami was expecting, but then again, what was written on Marinette's letter wasn't what Adrien as expecting either. As Kagami tries to understand Adrien's confusion, and find time to try to woo him from Marinette, Adrien is busy trying to understand Marinette's train-side send-off, and finding a pharmacy **Contains “Backwarder” spoilers**. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Adrien confused about his romantic feelings for anyone while spending a weekend with Kagami and trying to fulfill Marinette’s request. (Takes place within the episode “Backwarder”) Word Count: 19,735; multi-chapter *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Kisses Summary: Luka fears that he went too far with Marinette. She, on the other hand, doesn’t know how to tell him she wanted him to continue. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: A chaste, super PG make-out session with Lukanette Word Count: 753; one-shot [Tumblr exclusive vignette]

I Was Thinking of You Summary: Girls' Day derails when Marinette realizes the male lead of a romance movie reminds her of someone other than Adrien. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Lukanette mutual pining as Marinette also wrestles with her feelings for Adrien Word Count: 3565; one-shot [Tumblr]   [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

I Don’t Care Summary: Gabriel Agreste's life was safe, stable, predictable, and boring. That is, until he literally ran into a strange woman at a club; a club he didn't even want to go to. He felt instantly that this Emiile woman would forever change his life. He didn't realize how true that feeling was. **Mildly Gabriel-Apologetic story as it takes place pre-series** Rating: Teen and up Romance Level: Gabriel falling in love with Emilie Word Count: 5406; multi-chapter; incomplete *1st chapter was originally a Tumblr Exclusive; 2nd chapter not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Marinette’s Song Summary: Whenever Luka creates music it affects people. He can't handle having to hide his music anymore, and so he goes to the Tom & Sabine Charms and Potions shop for some help. Can Marinette's witchcraft allow Luka to finally share his music with the world? *Disclaimer: First attempt at an AU story* Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Pining Luka and Marinette falling for him too; AU where Adrien isn’t around Word Count: 10,786; multi-chapter [Tumblr]   [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Love Square Fluff Week 2020 Summary: My first attempt at doing Fluff Week for this fandom. I tried to loosely tie the different writing prompts together as a coherent story. Post-Season 3 spoilers included as the Love Square slowly collapses in on itself. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Standard Love Square (each side has at least one chapter dedicated to it), with the Love Square slowly collapsing into these two morons finally getting together Word Count: 18,247; multi-chapter; incomplete (I’m trying to work on those last two prompts still) [Tumblr]   [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Fruits Basket Fandom

Love Taps Summary: Kyo's little head bonks carry more meaning and more love than anyone could ever truly know. Anyone besides maybe Tohru, who reflects on an entire lifetime of receiving the loving raps on the noggin. *Disclaimer: Post-Manga and Fruits Basket Another spoilers* Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Married Kyoru as they raise their family Word Count: 2957; one-shot [Tumblr]   [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Unsent Letter Summary: In Kyo’s bedroom waste basket there is a crinkled up ball of paper: a letter he wrote to Tohru, but could never find the courage to hand to her. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Angst as Kyo reflects on his love for Tohru Word Count: 476; one-shot drabble *Apparently I forgot to post to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Hearts Together Summary: A collection of Kyo and Tohru shorts to celebrate Kyoru Week 2019 over on Tumblr. They'll range from sweet friendship to budding romance to full-on post-manga love. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Kyoru mutual pining all the way through marriage and a family Word Count: 11,100; multi-chapter [Tumblr (only a sample)]   [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Is She Your Mama Too? Summary: The curse has been broken. Tohru and Kyo have moved away, and Yuki will be leaving soon too. As life around him changes so drastically, Momiji decides it's time to get back the life he was owed. He only hopes it wouldn't bring any pain this time. *Post-Manga spoilers* Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Familial love Word Count: 5058; one-shot *Apparently I forgot to post to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

“Hey, Arnold!” Fandom

The Master of Breaking and Entering Summary: Helga, Gerald, and Arnold must break in to La Sombra's fortress to try to find Arnold's parents. How will Arnold react when Helga takes control of the situation? Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: My vision of what The Shortaki Kiss would be prior to the release of The Jungle Movie Word Count: 3203; one-shot *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

I Caught You a Star Summary: Something special goes down up on Wells Ridge during an early morning meteor shower. Something that Arnold has meticulously planned for quite some time. Now, can his best laid plans work out for him? Rating: Teen and up Romance Level: Shortaki proposal story originally written for 2011's Valentine's Day. Word Count: 7847; 2-chapters *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

I Thought You Liked Redheads Summary: Everyone is dying their hair lately, and getting a lot of attention for it. Should Helga cave and dye her hair too? Will that get the attention she craves from Arnold? Rating: Teen and up Romance Level: Shortaki teenage dating Word Count: 3621; one-shot *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

For Whom the Bells Toll Summary: We all saw what Arnold and Helga thought about being paired up by Rhonda's Origami Marriage Predictor. But what about Sheena and Eugene? Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Companion story for the episode “Marriage”, but following Sheena and Eugene as they each picture what being married would be like Word Count: 10,964 ; one-shot (split into 4 chapters on AO3) *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

The Adventures of Brainy Summary: Why is it that Brainy never gets the girl? Well, he's planning on changing that, even if it's just in his own daydream. Rating: General Audiences Romance Level: Brainy picturing himself as a hero of a 1930s serial melodrama with Helga as the Damsel; originally written for Hey Arnold Valentine's Day contest back in 2013 Word Count: 4962 ; one-shot *Not posted to Tumblr* [AO3]   [FFN]   [DA]

Other Fandoms

Sparks for the Moment Fandom: Seven Kingdoms Trilogy/Graceling Trilogy Summary: As Queen Bitterblue kissed Saf, he realized he had one more chance. Possibly one last chance to be with his Sparks. With the snow storm raging outside, no one would disturb them within that drawbridge tower anyway. *Spoilers for the story Bitterblue* Rating: Explicit (straight up smut) Romance Level: Saf & Bitterblue smut with bittersweet romance Word Count: 3442 ; one-shot [AO3 Exclusive]

[werejusttouchingeachother]

Playing With Fire

Summary: You tell yourself not to touch the flame over and over again, but like a child, you only learn once you feel the burn and the regret that comes with the sting

Genre: angst, smut

Pairing: Kai x Reader

Words: 5532

A/N: This was supposed to have only a hint of angst since I’ve never written angst before but I really got carried away and ended up writing a really angsty smut that I’m not all that mad at so yeah, just a heads up

The first thought that crossed your mind when you saw them was that no one is going to believe you.

You wouldn’t blame them either because you had a hard time believing your own eyes as your friend, Sera shook your arm in excitement.

The ride to the club hadn’t been the most pleasant tonight considering all the crowds and traffic on the roads which you had expected since EXO were having their concert at the stadium hall just a block away. What you hadn’t expected was for them to visit the club at midnight after wrapping up the concert.

“You realise what this means, right?” Sera yells to be heard over the music, her eyes shining with the lights reflecting from the overhead ceiling. “We’re basically seeing them for free!”

“I’m going to get a drink, do you need anything?” You ask, choosing to not respond to what she said in the guise that you didn’t hear her. Sera shakes her head in response and you quickly head for the bar.

Johnny, your usual bartender, raised an eyebrow at you as you approach. “Usual?”

You nodded, hopping up on the barstool as he turned to prepare your drink and you jumped slightly as the bass beat suddenly boomed through the club. You swivelled around in your seat with wide eyes, wondering what happened as the DJ increased the volume and tempo, short quick beats reverberating within the walls and you watched the crowd, almost as if in a trance, immediately grew thicker when everyone started moving and dancing to the beat.

As someone who’d frequent clubs often, it wasn’t rare to see the music control a large mass of bodies but the sudden random transition that happened just now was a random bout of surprise.

“EXO’s here,” Johnny said when you turned back around, in explanation.

“Yeah, I know,” you replied, nodding absentmindedly.

“It’s why he did that,” he gestures towards the DJ’s booth. “Crowds are too drunk to notice at this time anyway.”

“Right,” you say in disinterest, hoping he’d get the hint and drop it. You grab the glass that he slides towards you, murmuring thanks.

You turn to your side, watching the crowd and almost like a magnet, your eyes are riveting towards the lean man dancing on the far right of the floor, his body moving like fluid. It isn’t even at the centre of the floor but so captivating are his movements that everyone’s eyes are naturally drawn towards him, giving him his own spotlight.

You arch your back as you lean forward to see him clearer through the crowd and the blue lights overhead shift suddenly to red right as his eyes meet yours.

Kai.

Your eyebrows rise in shock and he smirks, straightening and your eyes widen as his hands grip the hips of the girl dancing in front of him, maintaining eye contact with you as he rolls his body suggestively against hers.

Feeling flushed more than ever, you turn back around to sip your momentarily forgotten gin and Coke, fingers wrapped tightly around the glass. You let the cold drink slosh around in your mouth before swallowing slowly. The image of what you just saw behind you still replaying behind your eyelids; his warm honey skin glowed in the bright lights of the club and his black tank top did nothing to conceal the rippling veins on his bare arms as he moved them around the random girl. You closed your eyes, recalling the stage that you’d seen just a few hours ago where Kai had stood at the centre. His eyes had surprisingly caught yours in the crowd right before the iconic chorus and you’d immediately frozen, not expecting him to have noticed you in such a large audience.

But he did, and if he was surprised, he didn’t show it at all as he raised his arm over his head, bit his lip seductively while looking right at you before thrusting his pelvis to the beat drop of ‘The Eve’.

You sighed deeply, pressing the cold glass to your forehead in an effort to cool your skin that felt as if it was on fire suddenly. You’d thought that your imagination was acting up at the concert hall but seeing him smirk at you right now in the club too, confirmed that yes, he definitely did see you and yes, that’s definitely why the pelvic thrusts had been especially more aggressive and sexual tonight.

Everyone around you had been saying stuff like, ‘Damn, Kai really let the hoe jump out tonight,’ but no, you know better. He’s always been a ‘hoe’ and a petty one too, which was why you were certain he was doing all this purposefully, knowing that you were watching.

“Hey, stranger.”

You froze as you heard the familiar voice behind you, addressing you in that familiar way. Taking a deep breath, you swivel to the side as Kai leans against the sleek black marbled counter, placing himself between you and the barstool beside you rather than sitting on it. In fact, this position had your knee pressing slightly to his side since you’d crossed your legs on your seat. You hated how he was still tall enough that even when sitting on a high barstool, you were on eye-level with him.

He gives you that familiar smile and that, paired with that greeting, takes you back, even if just for a moment, to the first night that you two had met. A cold November night where you’d met literally as strangers, felt an instant attraction that was supposed to be momentary, supposed to have fizzled out but eventually grew into a fire that grew more wild and toxic with time, lasting over two years with you constantly trying to desperately put it out with your tears before you finally decided to leave it ablaze as you packed up and left without another word.

Almost a year later, at a different country in a strange city, you gaze into those eyes that were grey from the lenses he hadn’t taken off after the concert, still holding that familiar intense flame that you recognise well.

“Hello, Jongin,” you reply back curtly, noticing his eyebrows rise as he acknowledges how you don’t respond with the flirty, ‘Hey, Kai’ that was your usual response in the same tone that he addressed you. His cool stature accompanied by the easy-going smirk unnerved you as you wondered if you’re the only one who could feel the terseness in the air.

He cocked his head at you. “Didn’t expect to see me here, did you?”

You raised an eyebrow, retorting, “Didn’t expect to see me at the concert, did you?”

Kai blinked, grinning at your words, leaning forward to you. “Still so feisty, Y/N.”

You glared at him. “And you’re still so…”

Cocky. Selfish. Arrogant. There’s so much you want to say but as a bead of sweat trickles painfully slowly down his purple hairline along his forehead and the side of his face, you feel the words dry in your mouth. Your eyes lock with his intense gaze as your stomach clenches and you want to look away but as always, it’s already too late—you’re already burning in the addicting flame.

You clear your throat, forcing yourself to turn around. "My friend got two tickets," you explain, sipping your drink. "She didn't have anyone else, so I came with. Don't flatter yourself."

Kai smiled, eyeing the glass which you'd just emptied. "Let me buy you another."

You shook your head immediately, shooting him a look as you start to get down. "No, thanks. I'm done."

"Oh come on—”

"I said no, Jongin." Your words are final, the sharp tone making his playful expression sombre for a second.

You're standing in front of him now, his hand gripping your arm as he attempted to pull you back when insisting to buy you a drink but at your words, both of you stop and freeze. His eyes are burning into yours and again, you can't look away. You've forgotten how to breathe and his grip loosens as his gaze searches your face. You start to step back to put more distance between the two of you but suddenly, a tall guy shoves into you from the back as he makes a beeline for the dancefloor. You stumble and Kai's hands are quick to reach out and help steady you, your own hands flying up reflexively to stop your fall except that during the collision, you laid them on Kai's chest in a panic where they rest now.

His hands are around your waist now and you'd be flush against him if it weren't for your hands keeping you separate. Your body is tingling from every inch that is pressed against his, you feel like you could collapse in his grip and your head is screaming at you to shove him off, to step away, to run, to do something but you can't seem to even breathe, nevertheless move as you hear your heart pound in your ears and your hands tingle as they feel that familiar warmth beneath the fingertips, the soft material of his shirt over that chest you had seen so often, touched so often, kissed, bit and licked so often.

Your eyes have absentmindedly drifted down now to where your hands are, various images and memories flashing through your head. All of them heated up your body more as you realise that yes, he was a fire that was perhaps toxic but you couldn't deny that the sex was always so incredibly hot and god, you missed it so damn much—his arms around you, his breath hitting your forehead where those gorgeous lips were hovering over, his warmth, his embrace, him.

Head feeling clouded with lust and longing now, you glance up and meet his eyes that have darkened now with the same emotions that you feel coursing through your veins.

And you realise then that even if you didn't recognise your own mother's voice one day, you'd still recognise the meaning behind this particular gaze of Kai, the one that still made your thighs clench.

You fooled your heart into thinking you'd forgotten him and your heart is mostly good at lying but your body doesn't even try to pretend.

"I should go," you found yourself muttering, your brain and last shred of arrogant pride overtaking the messy thoughts and emotions as they force the words out of your parted lips, your hands half-heartedly pushing on his chest to back away.

Kai blinks, arms falling away in surprise and you're disappointed for only a moment as the warmth falls away before your brain commands your legs to start moving and almost as if of their own accord, they start to turn you around to walk away.

Kai shakes his head and grabs your arm, stopping you completely and you turn your head to him again, eyes wide at his sudden strong grip.

"Let's dance," he says quickly.

You furrow your eyebrows at him in confusion, already shaking your head. "What? No, I can't—”

"Just one dance."

"I can't, I'm here with Sera, she doesn't know about us, no one does, remember? She'll search for me, I can't—”

"Please dance with me," he pleaded, his eyes boring into you with their intensity for the millionth time tonight, breaking down your resolve and guards with every second.

"Just once," he continued. He hesitated before adding, "For old time's sake. Please."

You pursue your lips, frowning slightly as you feel the last of your fight leave you. A sigh escapes your mouth and its enough to get Kai smiling in victory as his hand slips down your arm to wrap around your own instead, tugging you towards the dancefloor.

The music playing is a remixed version of a familiar R&B song, fast and slow at the same time. He stops when he reaches the centre and grabs the shoulder of a tall man with his hand that isn't holding yours. Chanyeol turns around, eyes widening when he sees you. 

"Y/N!" You don't hear him but rather see his lips mouth your name in surprise. The others turn around too and you've never wanted to run like you do right now but you can't even try—not when Kai is still holding your hand firmly in his. He doesn't stop to explain your presence and it makes you wonder if it was only him that noticed you at the concert but you don't have much time to think about it as Kai grabs two drinks from the hands of Chen and Chanyeol.

He turns to face you, hands holding out the drinks and you look up at him, hit with the sudden nostalgia of what you two always used to do when you clubbed together—rush to the centre of the floor, grab two drinks from the nearest strangers, down the entire thing and then use it as adrenalin to start dancing crazily, without a care for the world. 

You can't stop the smile from spreading across your face as you reminisce the memory, grabbing the drink from his hand. You nod at him and the two of you tip your heads back, chugging whatever was in the glass. 

Its vodka and the liquid burns as it goes down your throat but your heart is pumping with that familiar adrenalin, fuelled further by the beats pounding through the walls of the club, and its overpowered by the burn in your chest as you see the lights flicker on Kai's face. 

You grin at each other as you toss the glasses aside—Chanyeol is quick to grab them in a panic as he tries to save them from hitting the ground—and throw your hands up, surrendering your body to the music as you let it take over. 

You close your eyes, feeling the euphoria spreading from your chest to the rest of your body as you swayed. You feel a familiar grip around your waist and you don't open your eyes, throwing your head back as you dance in his arms. 

He pulls you in closer when you don't resist and you feel his body moving against yours, the warmth surrounding you until you can only feel him. 

You open your eyes, slowing your movements and see Kai looking right at you, his hands loosely holding your hips as he watches you with a small smile on his face. You weren't a great dancer—definitely not when standing near him, of all people—but when he looked at you the way he was doing right now, the way he always used to whenever you two did this, it made you wonder, even if only for a second. 

The lights are shifting colours rapidly again, changing with every beat that reverberates through the club and you think how it'd probably annoy you or hurt your eyes if you didn't choose to watch it reflect on Kai's gorgeous face. Your hands are on his chest again, loosely gripping the material of the EXplOration tank top and you can't remember for the life of you how they got there but you feel yourself regretting opening your eyes because now you were drowning in the flame that burned in his own yet again, more intoxicating than any vodka you've had. Kai doesn't give you much time to regret or even think to step away as he lowers his head, closing the gap between your mouths. 

You blame the vodka. You blame the music. You blame the way you felt in his arms again. You blame his addicting fire that is burning you yet again and you know—you know that you'll feel the sting later but for now, you decide to blame everything else in this club right now as you melt into his kiss, arms quickly wrapping around his shoulders as you arch your back to lean more into him. 

For now, you decided to just play with fire. 

His hands burn into your skin through the thin material of your shirt as they rest on your back and you lean your head to the side to kiss him harder. There's nothing sweet about the kiss—tongues wrestling in desperation, teeth clashing and him harshly biting down onto your lower lip, making you moan into his mouth. 

You hear the chorus of curses from the other members as they notice you and despite your eyes being closed, you feel them scurry to stand around you and block the two of you from anyone who might look over in your direction. 

You're arching your back until your chest is pressed up against his front, fingers slightly yanking on the hair at the back of his head in the way that he likes it, eliciting a groan from him that sends tingles straight to your throbbing core. 

Its only then that you realise Kai has somehow snuck his knee in between your thighs and as you let him kiss you senseless, you'd been grinding on his leg the whole time. 

"Guys, you can't do this here around so many people." Suho's voice cuts in like a sharp knife as he says, "Seriously, get a room." 

Kai pulls away then as if he realises and you blink hazily, feeling slightly dizzy. You're still pressed up against him, arms wrapped around each other and you blink a few times as you look at him. Almost as if he can understand that your sense is returning slowly with every second and that the regret will soon set in, Kai's eyes widen as he presses a quick kiss to your lips again. 

"Hyung's right, let's go," Kai says hurriedly but you're already shaking your head. 

"No, I can't." You stretch your arms back to remove his hands from around you but he doesn’t budge as you explain, "I'm serious about Sera being here. I can't ditch her."

"We don't..." He hesitated before tightening his grip on your waist. "We don't need all night." 

You narrowed your eyes at him as the beat suddenly dropped and loud deafening beats started thumping through the club. You yelled to be heard over the music, "Are you serious right now?" 

Kai dropped his head to yours, mouth moving to your ear, and you wondered if the pounding of your heart was louder than the music. Your fingers tightened around his arm that you'd been gripping as you feel his lips press against your ear, sultry voice loud and clear as he says, "We never did have post-breakup sex, you know?" 

Your eyes widen as he pulls away and gives you a meaningful look. Right as the excuse forms in your mind, along with the decision to leave this place right now, he pulls you to him again and kisses you feverishly. 

You blame his kiss. Again. 

Pulling away yourself this time, you watch the flash of panic in his eyes as he wonders if you're going to leave, replaced by the relief when you instead hold his hand and start tugging him to the far right of the club where the rooms for the private dances were. 

Barging into the first one, the order ‘Get out’ left your lips even before you'd properly seen who was inside. A couple hurriedly scrambled away from the other, trying to cover themselves as they glanced at you in confusion. 

"I said get out, can you not hear me?" You repeated before they could ask anything and after shooting glares to both of you, they left the room in a hurry, the similar dim red lights not even allowing a clear view of their faces. 

As soon as you heard the door slam shut behind you, you spun around to Kai and grabbed the front of his shirt with your hands, yanking him down to your height so you could kiss him. He was quick to react as he grabbed your wrists and pinned you to the closed door, the back of your head hitting the wooden frame as his mouth devours yours. You moan loudly and his one hand frees your wrist, lowering to lock the door at your side without breaking away from the kiss. 

As soon as you hear the lock click shut, he slides his leg in between yours and you groan into his mouth as you feel his thigh press into your throbbing heat. You grind against him, desperate for any kind of friction and his hand snakes down to your centre. You breathe heavily as his lips kiss down your jaw and suck on your neck, feeling his cool fingers untuck the shirt from your shorts and slip inside, making you spread your legs further. You're reminded briefly of how he always loved marking you all over by the desperate way that his mouth sucks the sensitive skin of your throat raw, as you notice he is still appreciative of the possessive purple bruises that he loves leaving on you.

You arch your back as you feel his finger enter you, your pussy immediately clenching around him in a grip that had him pulling away from your neck as he groaned loudly in pleasure. 

"Fuck, you're so wet already," he hissed against your skin as he stroked you up and down with his long digit, not wasting any time to be slow and teasing. You writhed underneath his ruthless finger fucking, your nails digging into his shoulders harshly as you moaned loudly. 

"Kai," you gasped causing him to suddenly pause in his movements. You whine in desperation and open your eyes to look at him, only realising when you see his expression that it was the first time you'd called him by that name tonight.  

You don't get the chance to catch your breath as he smashes his mouth onto yours hungrily. 

"Say it again," he demands gruffly as he inserts another and fingers you roughly. "Call my name again, Y/N." 

Knowing exactly what he wanted—since this definitely wasn't the first time—you arch further into him and thrust your hips to meet his fingers, voice dripping with desperation as you beg right in his ear, "Please, Kai, please just let me cum."

His groan is muffled against the crook of your neck as his finger thrusts into you at a quick pace, speeding after your words. Your moans increase to a crescendo as you feel yourself reaching your high and right then, Kai stops moving his fingers completely. 

Your body froze, the sudden stop in stimulation causing you to cry out in protest. You grab the back of his head that was still buried in your shoulder, yanking him back by his hair to gape at him. He keeps his eyes locked on yours, and you know him enough to know that he enjoys the growing sensation of despair in your eyes as he pulled out his slick fingers agonisingly slowly, the sounds of your arousal audible as he slid his hand out of your underwear. 

Almost ready to kill him now, you start to say, "You—” 

"I'd rather be inside you when you come, Y/N," he cuts off whatever threat was leaving your mouth, effectively shutting you up and presses a soft kiss on your lips.

"Jump," he mutters lowly in an oh-so-familiar order and almost reflexively—your body still remembering it—you do as he says and wrap your legs around his waist, arms around his neck while he presses his hands to your ass and pushes you into him. 

Slipping his tongue into your parted lips, both of your mouths caught in yet another heated messy kiss, he carries you away from the door. He sits you down on a smooth surface and you pull away to see that he's placed you on the wide armrest of the leather couch. 

You don't question it, more desperate than ever as you yank off his tank top. Roaming your hands down his chest and moaning into his mouth as you feel him groan at your touch, his own fingers are tugging at the hemline of your shirt. You pull away to help him tug it off and his hands are quick at unclasping your bra and throwing it off. His mouth is immediately sucking on your neck, lips travelling down your throat, over your collarbone, between the valley of your breasts before finally latching around your nipple. Your back arches off the seat, thighs clenching around his hips as you feel the sparks of arousal elicited by his tongue and lips, his long fingers massaging the one that wasn't occupied by his mouth.

"Fuck, Kai, please," you whine, fingers twisting his hair in frustration and he pulls away, quickly unzipping and yanking his jeans down. You lift yourself to help him remove the shorts from your legs and start to pull down your panties too but he slaps your hand. 

"Leave it on," he says and you watch in almost a frenzy as he pulls his cock out from his boxers. Pumping himself a few times, he lets go of your waist to pull your panty to the side and rubs the head of his cock up and down your slit, spreading your wetness. You're almost whimpering in desperation now, eyes trained down as you wait for him and he raises his fingers to your chin, lifting your head up. You meet his strong gaze only for a second before your eyes automatically shut as he kisses you—softer, gentler and tender this time, the gesture making your heart flutter a bit. Your eyes are still closed as you feel his thickness enter you in a smooth and fluid motion, easily slipping into your wet heat. 

Both of you moan in an almost synchronised harmony as Kai groans, "God, I've missed this so much."  

Home. You hated to admit it but in that second, in that shared breath and in the unity of your bodies, you and he both knew that this was like coming home. 

You wish you could respond the same but you settle for running your nails over his back as you kiss him, not caring that you weren't supposed to—only he could leave marks over you since it wasn't rare for him to take his shirt off, given his profession, and that's how it always was.

Until now. 

You expected him to freeze or even flinch like the way he did when you first had sex and tried kissing his neck--he'd pulled away immediately and told you not to do it, that it was too risky, in case it left any tell-tale marks the next day since he had a concert.

But Kai didn't do any of that now. Instead, he moaned into your mouth and that sound—dear god, did it awaken a beast in you. 

Was it just a petty vengeance to bruise him, to taint his perfect body with the same reflections of those purple flowers that his beautiful lips always painted on your skin that you were never allowed to reciprocate, to ruin him the way that he'd ruined you, to release all the frustration that you'd never gotten a moment to yell aloud since you'd upped and left all those months ago without even a confrontation? Or was it mere lust fogging your senses into giving him the best angry fuck of his life so that when he looked in the mirror tomorrow morning, he'd see the souvenirs and remember you, in this moment, right now? 

You don't know. You didn't even know if you wanted to hurt him the way he hurt you or just wanted him to regret not being able to have this anymore.

Your body, however, did not care for any of your thoughts as your mouth latched onto his neck almost desperately, the urge to absolutely wreck and mark Kai coursing through every vein in you. His soft moans and light tugs on your hair encouraged you as you harshly sucked on the supple skin of his throat until it was reddening, licking and nipping a trail of bruises down to his chest. Your tongue was only able to graze over his nipple before he yanked your hair roughly, making you gasp as his hips stuttered against yours at the new sensation that your tongue had sparked in him. He let go of your hair and Kai grabbed your waist in an attempt to catch you as you lost balance but ended up falling over you as you now leaned back on the armrest with your head touching the seat.

The new position had your hips involuntarily bucking higher and simultaneously Kai thrusting in deeper in what you could only describe as bliss. With his head buried in your chest, he circled his tongue around your erect nipple while a finger had reached your clit now as he rubbed against the bundle of nerves, pounding you into the couch until your legs were trembling around his body. The panty that he hadn't taken off was still stretched over the side that Kai had pushed it too, the slight restraint creating a sense of tightness in your walls that he was thoroughly enjoying as he thrust into you. 

"K-Kai," you stuttered breathlessly, hands clutching his back as you felt him fill you deliciously, the warmth of his erection as he thrusts into you. Your head was slapping against the leather seat of the couch and you were beginning to see spots in your vision as the sensations all surround you together in a perfect orchestra—his thickness stretching you out, his finger relentlessly circling your clit and his mouth overstimulating your nipple. 

You moan and arch your back as you feel that familiar tightening in your stomach and you feel cool air suddenly hit your wet breast as he pulls away. You open your eyes to look at him and as soon as your eyes lock with his, that were already focused on you, where his chin rests between your breasts, he grabs your wrists and pins them to your sides on the armrest, pulling out and shoving deep into you.

You let out a loud groan as Kai slams into you repeatedly, his hips thrusting without mercy as he fucks you hardly and roughly into oblivion. You don't look away, knowing that what he wanted was to watch you as you came—yet another sight he enjoyed.

But as your orgasm crashes down on you, you can't help throwing your head back with your eyes closed, lips parting as you feel it hit your body in waves. You shudder underneath him and whimper as he doesn't waver in his rough fucking, eager to chase his own high. Your legs have almost gone numb but you force yourself to raise your thighs and wrap them tighter around his waist, clenching the walls of your pussy around his cock and it's enough to trigger his orgasm as he floods you with warmth, filling you up in that familiar delicious way that you'd missed so much.

Heavy breathing fills the air as the two of you pant, your head slightly clearing as you finally see the ceiling which had been blurry all this time.

Kai rests his head on your chest, ear pressed to your heart and you feel him smile, knowing it was probably because he could hear your heartbeat that was still erratic. Your body is burning and he lifts his head to look at you, catching you off guard. 

And then, he smiles. 

He smiles that same smile, drawing you like a moth to a flame and it’s enough to finally hear those warning bells in your head now as your eyes widen, hands going to his shoulders in order to shove him off you harshly. 

Kai's eyes widen as he detaches from your body, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he watched you quickly adjust your soaking panties into their original position and get back into your shorts. 

"What are you doing?" He asks, frowning at you. 

"Leaving," you mutter as you grab your shirt that was tossed on the floor and you don't even pull it on properly in your hurry to reach the door but Kai is quick to grab you. 

"What the fuck?" He seethes in disbelief, eyes narrowed into slits as he holds your arm in a death-grip. "Are you fucking kidding me?" 

"'We don't need all night,' remember?" you mocked his words from earlier, the bitterness evident in your tone. "You wanted post break-up sex and you got it. So I'll leave now before I do more things that I'll regret." 

You don't wait for him to respond as you quickly unlock the door and step out of the room. You close it behind you and quickly manoeuvre through the crowd to get to Sera in order to get the hell out of here before things could get worse. 

And you know they would. Because like an idiot, you'd played with fire again and not even five minutes later, you could already feel the burn.

[petrichorismydrug]

RUBATOSIS || JJK || Part 01

Pairings: Jungkook x reader 

Genre: Fluff, minor angst (this can change) | Roommates, coffee shop, soulmates AU | Latina OC

Word count:  2.8+k

Sumary:  It started with a small hold of his hand, then it was just easy to hold his hand because for some weird and unknown reason it fit perfectly with yours.

A/N:  I'm a sucker for Soulmate AU's, what about it? (also hybrid ones but thats a conversation for my other fic) I just can say that this story is a mess in my mind but I am working really hard to put all in place (dont know how I really made this chapter with all the ideas flying and me barely catching them)

PT1 | PT2

[THEN]

 Living alone was one of the most exciting thoughts that crossed your mind, the idea alone was intriguing and scary but more than anything, adventure was what made you tremble with anticipation. Of course, that was until actually starting your alone and independent life that realization hits and time showed you that in reality this whole thing of having your apartment and control of everything was nice, yes, but, not sharing it with anyone, it is one of the things in this life that you started to dislike the most. Ironically, this epiphany showed a little late, to be precise six months after living alone.

Basically, to have no one to prepare breakfast for in the morning, someone to eat lunch with and talk about the little things of the day that made you smile someone to dine with and maybe watch a bad comedy or horror movie to criticize every mistake and focus on them not to die of fear. Arriving from work and not being received by anyone, and in the same way, never receiving anyone made you aware of the things that meant to be forgotten wanted and never show up again. Everything was going well if not for that, and in a way, this is affecting other aspects of your almost perfect life.

Have you ever eaten something ultra-delicious, but then you eat it later with someone you appreciate, it tastes even better? Well, if you haven’t you should, this is very well known, everyone loves food, so you do, food is good and being good in the kitchen was a plus to your situation. You could serve someone a three-course meal and never know it’s a way of saying ‘You cute, I dig you’, that’s the beauty of food, it’s like another language and the ones interested in it can talk it.

but her mind always returns to the same, 'if there is no one to share it with, what is the point? it doesn’t taste quite as good as it should be'

This is one of the many problems she had to deal with when raised by a somewhat traditional Latin family. Of course, there are many good things in the culture, but you stop at times like these and start to feel homesick now that you are away, and you want to have the whole family together to talk, sing, and even to discuss.

Her apartment is nice, comfy and with an open concept that keeps a clear and controlled environment. The first month was challenging and adventurous, but as time passed there was not enough yarn to knit, books to read, enough plants to take care, enough flour to make desserts or even, enough series on Netflix to obsessed with, and when she started to lose weight the problem was clear. She needed a roommate. Clearly.

Reaching that conclusion was easy, now, finding a roommate, that was the real problem, because it's not just finding a roommate, but finding the right one. Gender? Doesn't matter. Age? Doesn't matter. Being crazy? Can't happen -with one in the apartment is more than enough-. Big pets? Sadly, building owners do not allow animals larger than a domestic cat, which is an injustice, even more because they give less opportunities of a warm home to larger animals. Don't have time for your roommate? Don't like sweets? Sorry you must go. Next please.

***

"Jin, have you seen my wooden spoon?" the boy in question looked at her sideways and a smile spread across his face, she was looking everywhere picking up things, opening and closing drawers and just seeing her was funny.

"The one I give you? The one with your name on it?"

"Yes, I been looking for her and I think I dropped somewhere, and I can't lose her, I just, can't" knowing that missed pieces slash things go to another part and you don't know when they will come to you again was intriguing, but this spoon was way to special to just go around losing her. Many, many socks were missed, and their other half was lonely, but it literally was not a big of a deal when you can buy another pair of the same, more if they were weird shapes and colorful printed all over them. luckily the polka dots and strapped ones that she only uses on special occasion were safe and sound at the back of her drawer.

"Maybe, and just maybe, don't pay attention to me, but, are we talking about the one in your hand?" she let out the air she was holding, and worried to see that yes, in fact, she had the spoon in her hand. She dropped his shoulders defeated.

"I think I am going crazy" While making coffee for the client in turn, Jin asked with real curiosity

"What is going on? the neighbors being noisy? Because you know I can deal with them." she narrowed her eyes to him

"First of all, yes, you are very loud. I do not care what you say, jumping in your bed late at night, because according to you, 'it is relaxing' ... it does not sound good, much less from my apartment that sadly it is below yours." he looked embarrassed by the scarlet color of his ears, but his superb smile covered him very well "It doesn't matter, forger it, but don’t you dare your Tim Allen 'how do I look' voice of  Santa Clause, it would no work this time"

"No but really, 'How do I look? Nice?'" Jin said with all the self-confidence of the world and mastery of that phrase with everything; facial and body management. Delivering the coffee he made, with a smile to the girl who now -if she had not had one before- developed a crush to the barista. "Have a nice day" was said with the most common custom service and with that, she left stunned, like many other women during the day. It is good to have a partner who is your boss and your friend. "What is going on?" she pouts

"Nobody told me it would be so difficult to find a roommate" Jin scoffed

"Whoever told you it was easy is a dic- addicted to lies"

"Just ... you're my friend, be a nice one and support me, will you?"

"What do you want me to say? “she pouts again, and the simple act made Jin hug her "Do you want me to live with you?"

"Aw, you're so cute, but no, of course not."

"Hey!" he was offended " What do you mean by that?" she takes a step away from him, and her stare was warm but little sad.

"Jin, we can't live together " the look they shared for a few small seconds that felt like a small eternity, full of knowledge and words never said, made the environment a bit heavy. Some time ago, the elephant in the room was big, now it is just back in occasions like this, looking thru the big window but he walks away immediately.

"I know" His words were soft.

The bell of the store rang, announcing another customer. He took her hand giving it a little stroke and kissed her forehead; received customers with his characteristic customer service smile was his specialty, while she was dedicated to continue with her cookies, which she had forgotten for a moment, trying to forget the strange and abstract reddish tones on her cheeks.

 ***

 When closing time was finally near the store was for some funny reasons always busier that other hour in the day, and maybe any other coffee shop at the area. Reasons? The boss. A lot of girls tried to invite him to date and, what better opportunity than waiting the last moment of work of someone to do it? It was sad when they all went alone with their hot coffee or chocolate with no boy next to them, but Jinbony was no easy boy. And really, people need to start picking that up, he has been the same with the little fan club that has been gathering almost every day, and it is a little scary that there are more and more girls, more in the weekends, lucky for him those are his off days lately. But on the bright side, they always spend a good amount of money in the coffee so they can come as much as they want.

Even though, with all the work, girls whining and acting cute and one or two difficult clients, the day was nice and the night pleasant, not so cold nor so warm, just perfect, announcing the slipping cold and beautiful winter, waving its way, with wind embraces, walking if not running faster and quietly, like a whisper, a soft and caramelized rustle.

The hope of having a roommate was getting farther and farther. Jin was setting the alarm when her phone rang. At this time, it was normal to receive calls from unknown numbers, even so, it always filled her with distrust. Phone calls were never an easy task to do, no when you don't know the person at the other end, and surely, she does not know this one.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this _____?" the voice said excited. It sounded a little breathy, and kind of appealing?

"Yes, who is calling?"

"Oh sorry, I'm calling for the apartment, I saw your announcement at the University, are you still looking for a roommate?" at that moment, Jin stepped out of the store and locked the door, turning to see the surprise and confusion on her face mouthing a 'what?' she dismissed the question with a gesture. 'University?' she thought, not knowing what the guy was talking about because she doesn't remember putting ads there.

"Yes, it's me, I mean I am am-still-am-looking for one" silence. Hardly 3 seconds passed until some background voices filled the silence, as if he had his phone on speaker. A 'Shhh' was heard.

"So... you are still looking for a roommate" the voice said as matter of fact

"Ah! yes. The room is still free."

"Perfect, when can I come to see it?"

"When you want to."

"More perfect even, can I come tomorrow?" the voice for weird that it was, started to put a smile in her face.

"Yes, at what time?"

"Around 6 it's fine with you?"

"Six is good."

"Awesome, see you tomorrow then." and a lot of 'wooo's' were heard before he could end the call.

Suddenly her phone was really spellbinding, and it seemed to be interesting this happening? Finally, a roommate. She wasn't even mad at how the call ended. She looked heavenward, taking notes of how the sky was dark blue and purple with lots and lots of stars, it was without doubts a pleasant night, even the police siren that was being heard at the distance was a great add to the calm night.

The voice of his friend brought her back of her mental notes of the day. "So, a new prospect?"

"Yes" she said almost breathless "This is so on point, don't you think?" they started to walk the so known path that lead to their homes.

"Yes, I know, you are always lucky to have things as you want."

"Hey, that is so uncalled for. What do you mean?" Jin scoffed.

"You are a good person that for some weird reason always gets what she wants." that matter of fact face didn't pleased her

"That is so not true! I beg to differ."

"You really do, you just don't notice"

"It's just coincidence Jin."

"Didn't you know?" he went poker face "Coincidence does not exist." his serious face and tone was broken by his laughter,

getting her too, and basically that was a daily basis thing between them, there was always smiles here and there, laughs and inside jokes that only the two of them knew. being with Jin was always a roller coaster but without the feeling of leaving your stomach at the back of the starting game. When finally laugh died she could speak.

"That's what they say, but honestly, I do think coincidence has a little space there. Maybe not everything is destiny or fate, don't you think?"

"Nah, if that was the case, we would be dating now." the way he said it and the little effort he put into sounding normal, gave chills. There is no way for someone to say something so embarrassing and not feel sorry as soon as the words leave your mouth

"Oh, shut it." it seems that she said those words, for the colors on her face, what is that color called? traffic light red? But Jin didn’t seem affected, instead he put on a dramatic voice, accompanied with a hand on his heart.

"If it wasn't for Brandon, that little bastard."

“He has nothing to do with this.”

“Say that all the times you want, but he is the one that…”

“Jin, you know that that is no true, lets just leave it there, and besides, you are no talking true here, you never liked me.”

Jin kept silence, everyone knew she had a crush on him in the past, because when you meet in person someone such as him is impossible not to curse the nature for the injustice and be all dragged by his looks. And then you get to know him and he is amazing, but then you meet him more and you know that he is no really the guy for you, and its fine, he is an amazing friend but nothing more can come from that relationship, even though everyone in the world says that men and women can not be real friends because sex is always present, that was not true in their friendship, they all, were just friends, nothing more nothing less.

 ***

 They finally reached their building and were at the elevator. The silence in there was replaced by the notification tone of her phone. A text message to be exact.

 [09:36 p.m.] Unknown 'my name is Jungkook, btw'

[09:36 p.m.] Unknown 'Jeon'

[09:36 p.m.] Unknown 'Just figured you wanted to know'

[09:37 p.m.] Unknown 'or maybe not, but'

[09:37 p.m.] Unknown 'see you tomorrow'

 "How cute" she stated, answering back to him.

"I know I'm cute, and you know, it would be a pleasure to have my heart broken by you"

"Please stop quoting the fault in our star, that is weird." and by the time they reached her floor, she pressed send.

 [09:40 p.m.] Me ‘Pleased to know your name, no long stranger. See you tomorrow.’

[polar-stars]

3rd out of an 5 part ask of @smokeprincess24 (sorry that it took a bit)

👹 How does you OC act around different people and how does their personality change to match the environment they’re in? How do they act with: friends, family, strangers, children or their lover(s)?

For the most part, Yasu is just more open and comfortable around people he's close to. He's friendly and polite to strangers, but also rather closeted and he won't expose all too much of himself. Around his friends and family he's just a bit more prone to be more talkative, even joke here and there and just generally be more laid-back so to speak. 

🍅 How easily is your OC embarassed? What subjects make them flush and why? What event has made your OC the most embarassed they’ve ever been?

Yasu is not all too easily embarrassed and when he is, he's still rather good at hiding it actually. He blushes mainly at sexual things being openly discussed because he thinks that's inappropriate. 

He's usually good enough at reading people and a situation to know what to say…So when someone gives him the impression he said the wrong thing, that certainly embarrasses him as well. 

💥 Are there any emotions your OC doesn’t know how to deal with, doesn’t understand or hates having to feel? Any reason behind this?

Answered already.

🏀 Does your OC have any skills that people wouldn’t expect them to have? Do they have a hobby or pass time that others would consider strange or weird? How did they learn this particular skill or pick up this hobby?

The fact that Yasu can dance as well as he can is much of a surprise to quite a few people and not many find out, since he does not often dance anyway and rather sits somewhere at the sides of parties. 

He also has aa hidden poetic side to him and writes poems and song texts in secret at times. He himself doesn't consider them good enough though to show them to anyone. 

⭐ Does your OC like to sleep alone or do they enjoy sharing their bed? Have they been to any sleepovers? Have they ever been camping? What did they think of the experiences if so?

As I've said already, he did share a bed at times with Chieko when they were really small smols and he never really minded it. It was fun listening to her discussing various theories and stuff she had thought over throughout the day and he liked it. 

He does not have all too much experience beyond that, except for having to share a bed with his sister Kasumi at times (which was also not much bother to him since Kasumi is rather peaceful) and he does not think off it as anything special.

🍏 When your OC says “I had a bad day” what does that tend to mean? Is it really as bad as they’re saying or are they being a bit dramatic?

When Yasu speaks about a bad day it's most likely truly, truly bad. He's not really one to over exaggerate and he's also not one to speak up a lot over being upset or something in the first place. So when he actually opens his mouth and says he's having it rough this day? That definitely means that it's serious. 

At the same time he doesn't really use this phrase as a way to say "please comfort me" but it's more of a way of telling whoever he's talking to that he's most likely not going to be as polite and friendly as usual….it's an advanced apology in a sense should he maybe snap. In order to avoid such he quickly retreats in his room anyway. 

Again…Yasu pushes people away when upset. 

🐉 How religious is your OC? Do they pray to any god(s) or do they not believe in that kind of stuff? What is their view of religion in general? Where do they believe people go when they die? If your OC is not religious why not and what do they believe in otherwise?

Yasu was raised to be a Buddhist by Ryoko and does hold on to the religion all his life. But at the same time his beliefs do not really affect his daily life all too immensely. 

To him it does still have something comforting though in a sense. 

💧 What is something from your OC’s past they’re the most ashamed of and why? What is something they’re really proud of? And lastly what is something in their past that could make them shake with dread?

What Yasu is truly going to be massively ashamed off is yet to come in the future, 

Other than that, Yasu is very skilled off avoiding blunders and while of course he was embarrassed here and there there's no real major event so far that truly stands out to him as the most embarrassing thing that ever happened. 

🐟 What was your OC like as a baby? What were they like as a child? A teenager? An adult? How do you think they’ll develop ten years into their future? Twenty years? Will they live to old age?

As a baby, Yasu was already more calm than other babies and didn't make all too much tumult; which Ryoko interpreted as a sign for having chosen the right name for him ("Yasu" means "peace, quiet"). He showed an affinity for nature early on and would show himself incredibly happy when Ryoko or Shun would take him outside into their garden or a park or something and set him down in the grass.

As a child he was not really the most social kid around but thanks to his mother he had learned enough polite phrases to get on everyone's good terms. While he did not make all too many friends, he was always pretty well-liked and in the end he always had Chieko as a friend. He ultimately spent most of his time with his parents however (Chieko in the end still lives in Tokyo, while he grew up outside of town and as I said he didn't spent all too much time with his peers in the small town he lives in) and helped them out a lot. His favorite hobby as a child was most definitely the exploration of the forest that's close to the family's house. 

As a teen he'd grew into a very friendly and calm young man who does usually not have all too much problems to get on people's good sides. While he's still much of an introvert, he's more sociable and open than he was as child thanks to Polar Star's influence mainly. He also came to idolize his parents however and carries an everlasting fear of disappointing them. 

Yasu won't change all too much as an adult, given that he was already rather mature for his age when he was a teen. He will have learned some of the errors in his ways however (like his overexaggerated protectiveness over Chieko) and also his worries regarding his parents will have been eased. I see him getting married rather late in his 20s honestly. 

🍇 Does your OC have any bad habits? Does your OC have any addictions like smoking or drinking? How did they fall into these habits and why? 

Yasu's major bad habit is definitely trying to gulp down all of his negative emotions because he feels he would be a bother if he were to vent and just let them out. He looks out for other people a good bunch of times but when it comes to his own emotions he likes to ignore them until he's alone with them at night creating the perfect conditions to overthink everything (which does not help…ever). 

He also drinks on Polar Star Parties but he can hold his liquor. No one ever saw Yasu drunk. 

🔮What does your OC think is their best trait. What is actually their best trait? What about their flaws? Are they one to admit these flaws or do they like to pretend they’re perfect?

Yasu thinks his best trait is his politeness but I'd say his best trait is his care.

A flaw of his is that his own worries, anxieties or envy can cloud his view and his judgement immensely at times. 

🌸 What’s a sentence that would make your OC’s day better? One that would make them laugh? One that would make their day worse? Why? What words would you have to say to them to completely ruin their day?

A sentence that can always make his day better is certainly "Can I use your [insert fermentation product here]?" He really wants to support his mother's business on Totsuki and advertises it whenever he cans. It really makes him happy when his efforts pay off. 

A sentence that can ruin his day is any sentence that has both "Chieko Marui" and "Shigeo Eizan" in it. 

🌷 How much effort does your OC put into their looks? Do they care much about how they’re dressed or what their hair looks like or are they not bothered? Could they be considered a snob or a slob?

Yasu's pretty casual in his fashion choice and is mainly concerned over wether the clothes are comfortable and loose than anything else. 

He takes rather good care of his hair though but there's not much else that concerns him a lot. 

❤️ What inspired you to make this OC? How long have you had them? How have they changed in the time you’ve been developing them?

Shun/Ryoko was one of my first ships…of course I wanted to give them a child. Yasu is one of my first Fanchild OCs and was created alongside Kimiko, Mika and Hiroshi. He was really tough to design as I had a lot of trouble mixing Shun's and Ryoko's designs. Eventually I came up with the idea to give him Shun's blinding bangs and Ryoko's silkiness but…how exactly that would look changed multiple times throughout the years ahdhd He truly took long to be finalized in that area. 

Character-Wise, I decided very quickly that he'd be Chieko's best friend. Because of course he would. It also didn't took me long to characterize him as peaceful, calm and such…given that I had literally named him that. 

Over the years he hasn't changed all too much personality-wise. But I went through a lot, a lot of story-ideas with him…many of them very angst.

🧡 What traits of your own do you see in this OC? Are they a little bit self-inserty? Don’t be shy, we all put parts of ourselves into the creations we love!

I do always try my best to be polite, especially in Real Life. I don't think I excel at this as good as Yasu does because I do tend to be inattentive to my surroundings at times but well….It's still something?

I do ultimately prefer the ocean but I also like the forest as well. Also we have a bit of the same view on religion, although we're not part of the same religion ahdhd

What I majorly can relate to in Yasu though is his tendency to always attempt to shut down all negative feelings because I do as well like to pretend that sadness and anger do not exist. 

💚 Are you writing anything with this OC or planning on writing anything for them? Do you rp with them or are they just for fun to mess around with?

You gave me asks for them but I'm still into figuring out how exactly to write them ; 7 ;

💗 Ramble a bit about this character!

Yasu can be greatly used for angst but in the end I do want to know him happy. He deserves it. 

He'll makes some mistakes here and there but in the end, he's always trying his best. I really don't know how to construct his future really…ovo;; But I hope I'll eventually figure it out. 

[interludcs]

          BENEDETTA   PORCAROLI   ,   CIS   FEMALE   ,   SHE   /   HER   →   according   to   the   school   records   ,   GIOVANNA   ELOISA   ARGENTI   has   been   attending   sacred   heart   for   the   past   two   years   .   i   last   saw   them   hanging   around   stan's   place   ;   i   think   they   were   tying   cherry   stems   into   knots   .   at   twenty   -   one   ,   gio   has   been   studying   classics   and   get   this   ,   i   heard   that   her   bloodline   has   long   been   cursed   to   succumb   to   inevitable   madness   and   it’s   been   the   cause   of   many   mysterious   deaths   in   the   family   already   —   figure   it’s   true   ?   everyone   around   here   always   associates   them   with   biting   into   an   apple   only   to   realize   it’s   rotten   ,   a   bloody   nose   dripping   onto   silk   stockings   ,   and   the   distorted   screech   of   a   violin   coming   from   another   room   .   in   the   time   since   these   strange   happenings   ,   they   have   encountered   unexplained   occurrences   .  

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     QUICK  STATS  !

full  name  :   giovanna   eloisa   argenti

nickname(s)  :   gio   ,   gigi   (   although   she   likes   to   think   she   outgrew   it  )

zodiac  :   scorpio   sun   ,   gemini   moon   (  click   !  )

sexuality  :   bisexual   .

occupation  :   student   &   heiress   .

birthplace  :   rome   ,   italy   .

current residence  :   sacred   heart   academy   . 

pinterest   :   (   click   !   )  

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     BACKSTORY  !  (   tw   :   depression   ,   murder   ,   suicide   &   drug   abuse   )

born   in   1953   to   one   of   the  wealthiest   families   in   italy   !   the   argenti's   posses   a   ridiculous  and   tbh   kinda   disgusting   fortune   because   of   their   distant   ties   to   the   old   italian   monarchy   ...   and   are   also   long   rumored   to   have   been   cursed   hundreds   of   years   ago   as   divine   punishment    for   the   sins   of   a   past    family   member   . 

the   family    has    a    long   and   gruesome   history   —   good   husbands   turning   into   killers   ,   more   than   one   argenti   woman    flinging   herself   off   one   of    the   many   balconies   in   the   family   estate   ,   children   who   hear   voices   in   the   night   .   more   often    than    people   care   to   count   ,   these   fits   of   madness   are   seemingly   inexplicable   .        

giovanna   was   born   on   chilly   autumn   night   .   she   would   be   her   mother’s   first   and   last   child   ,   but   lucianna   argenti   saw   her   baby   girl   as   anything   but   a   miracle   .   when   she   was   only   five   months   old   ,   a   nanny   discovered   the   woman   trying   to   drown   giovanna   in   the   bathtub   ,   stuck   in   a   trance   she’d   later   have   no   recollection   of   being   in   .   long   in   denial   of   the   family   curse   ,    marco   argenti   hired   nearly   every   notable   doctor   in   italy   ,   but   none   of   them   could   find   a   sound   explanation   for   the   violent   and   nonsensical   trances   his   wife   would   experience   for   the   next   three   years   before   ultimately   taking   her   own   life   .        

leaving   giovanna   to   grow   up   all   alone   in   the   too   big   family   estate   at   the   hands   of   nannies   ,   marco   argenti   would  spend   the   better   years   of   his   only   daughter’s   life   traveling   all   around   europe   ,   desperate   to   shake   the   ghost   of   his   wife   ,   but   never    succeeding   . 

despite   all   the   tragedy   early   on   in   gio’s   life   ,   she   had   an   almost   typical   upbringing   for   someone  in   her   socioeconomic   circle   .   a   childhood   devoid   of   the   love   her   parents   were   supposed   to   give   ,   nannies   who   gave   in   to   the   rotten   demands   only   a    wealthy   child   and   sole   heir   could   conjure   up   ,    a    house   that   never   felt   like   a   home   .

by   the   time   she   was   a   teenager   ,   gio   had   grown   up   to   be   a   different   kind   of   monster   —   not   the   madwomen   her   classmates   would   snicker   about   when   speaking   ill   of   the   blood   that   flowed   through   her   veins   ,    but   something   perhaps   more   dangerous   ,   a   selfish   girl   too   clever   and   too   beautiful   for   her   own   good   . 

on   the   eve   of   her   18th   birthday   her   father   makes   his   grand   return   home  ,   gone   so   long   he   mistakes   his   daughter   for   a   maid   before   a   groundskeeper   politely   informs   him   of   his   mistake   .   causing   more  tension   still   was   the   brand   new   gold   band   on   his   ring   finger   ,   as   well   as   the   announcement   that   he’s   selling   the   estate  ,   and   that   gio’s   to   come   live   with   his   new   wife   and   three   small   children   in   france   .

the   day   giovanna   argenti   turns   18   is   a   day   she   can   no   longer   remember  save  for   waking   up   in   the   remnants   of   a   burnt   down   home   ,   ash   caked   underneath   her   fingernails   ,   smoke   burning   her   lungs   .   servants   who   have   been   loyal   to   the   argenti   family   for   decades   will   later   testify   that  there   had   been   a   terrible   accident   lighting   the   birthday   cake   that   night   ,   that   marco  argenti   had   never   returned   home   the   night   before   ,    and   that   the   family   of   four   in   paris   crying   murder   were   nothing    but   scammers   after   the   family   fortune   .

gio   spends   the   next   year   scrambling   to   piece   together   the   mysterious   events   ,   a   tiny   voice   inside   her   head   insisting   something   wasn’t   right   with   the   story   she’d   been   fed   by   the   people   who  raised   her   ,   albeit   confused   as   to   why   they’d   hide   the   truth   if   something   sinister   had   indeed   happened  that   night  .  she   could   have   sworn   the   memory   of   her   father   coming   home   was   a   real   one   —   until   she   gets   a   letter   in   the   mail  ,   signed   marco   argenti   ,   polaroid  attached  ,   a   blurry   shot   of   a   man   who   bears   the   family   resemblance  standing   in   front   of   the   statue   of   liberty   .

cue   the   drug   abuse   (   coke   being   her   poison  of   choice   )   ,   the   reckless   and   dangerous   stunts   all   in   the   name   of   having   a   good   time   ,   the   mind   numbing   sex   with   strangers   .   heart   heavy   with   the   idea   that   she   was   indeed   going   insane   ,   following   in   the   footsteps   of   all   the   argenti’s   that   had   come   before   her   ,   giovanna   was   left   with   the   haunting   sensation   that   her   life   was   already   doomed   ,   and   so   she   might   as   well   make   the   most   of   it   .  on   the   flip   side   of   this   she   also   came   to   the   realization   that   she   could   pretty   much   ....   do   whatever   she   wanted   and   get   away   with   it   ?   people   already   thought   she   was   cursed   and   crazy   ...   might   as    well   act   the   part   ...   a    little    self   fulfilling   prophecy  ...   as   a   treat   <3      

in   a   feeble   attempt   to   save   her   from  an   untimely   and   rather   stupid   demise   ,   she   is   shipped   off   to   sacred   heart   academy   ,   a   place   a   distant   cousin   once   attended   .   mind   clouded   by   addiction   and   unresolved   trauma   alike   ,   giovanna   can’t   be   sure   the   strange   happenings   at   sacred   heart   are   real   at   all   or   just   a   product   of   a   dark   and   overactive   imagination   .   

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     PERSONALITY  +  TIDBITS  !

first   &   foremost   ...   gio   was   inspired   loosely   by   some   sexy   women   including   miss   effy   stonem   from   skins   ,   choi   sooji   from   tempted   ,   ludo   from   baby   ,   villanelle   from   killing   eve   &   lady   macbeth   minus   the   murder   (   ...   unless   ?   😏   )   ,   as   well   as   more   lana   del   rey   songs   than   i   care   to   admit   so   we   won’t   be   talking   about   it   aha   x

yes   what   i’m   trying   to   say   is   she’s   a   little   unhinged   ...   but   in   that   fun   sexy   way   like   when   amy   dunne   gives   the   cool   girl   speech   in   gone   girl   .

speaking   of    cool   girls   ...   gio   is   one   😌   you   would   think   growing   up   with   a   last   name   that’s   literally   famous   for   being   cursed    would   have   put   a   bigger    damper   on   her    popularity   among   people   but   there’s   a   certain   fascination   gio   holds   and   she   knows   it   .   this   isn’t   to   say   she’s   got   a   lot   of   friends   because   she   definitely   doesn’t   ,   she   just   knows   how   to   get   people’s   attention   .

at   her    core   she   is   clever   ,    charming   ,    everything   someone   who   grew   up   with   money   is   bound   to   be   .   but   unlike   the   selfishness   of    other   trust   fund   babies   ,   gio’s    operates   on   a   different   scale   .   she’s   self   obsessed   ,    not   because   she   views   herself   as   better   than   anyone   else   ,   but  because   she’s    so   haunted    by   the   idea   that   something   terrible   and   wicked   exists   inside   of   her   and   it’s   only   a   matter   of   time   before   darkness   takes   over   .

in   an   effort   to   counter   that   weight   ,    she   breezes   through   life   without   taking   much   seriously   .    toying   with   people   ,   the   mind   games   she   plays   ,    it’s   all   an   effort   to   distract   herself   ,   to   entertain   her   brain   with   thoughts   that   somehow   seem   lighter   in   comparison   to   her   own   inevitable   self   destruction   although   the   people   she   plays   with   might   say   otherwise   . 

consequences   should   scare   her   more   than   they   do   ,   but   honestly   she’s   got   a   penchant   for   doing   the   things   deemed   bad   for   her   .   on   one   hand   she   figures   little   matters   if   she’s   truly   cursed   ,    on   the   other   hand   she   figures   if    she   is   cursed   than   whatever   consequence   comes   her   way   is   deserved   .

flirty   ,    but   most   of   the   time   it   never   means   anything   .   she   is   prone   to   intense   infatuations   ,   however   ,   all   of   which   have   ended   tragically   so   far   so   proceed   with   caution   .

she’s   definitely   someone   most   people   would   know   of   ,    as    she’s   got   an   almost   bad   habit   of   striking   up   conversations   with   whoever   ,   but   ask   someone   to   name   her   favorite   color   or   any   profound   fact   about   her   and   they   probably   wouldn’t   be   able   to   .

very  nosy   due   to   her   childhood   of   people   watching  and   intensely   studying   the   adults   who   raised   her   ,   and   so   the   habit   has   carried   on   into   her   adult   life   .   she   won’t   outwardly   pry   ,   but   if   you   catch   her   interest   she’ll   unabashedly   observe   you   like   she’s   an   actor   trying   to   better   understand   their   part   .

tons   of   fun   at   parties   ,   but   also   in   class   ,   considering   she’s   snorting   enough   coke   on   the   daily   to   treat   school   like   it’s   one   big   social   gathering   .   life’s   a   beach   baby   <3

studying   classics   because   she   likes   how   intense   the   stories   and   history   are  ,   but   she’s   surprised   herself   by   being   rather   good   at   the   language   aspect   of   the   major   .

deep   deep   down   ...  there   is   the   desire   to  be   understood   and   loved   despite   whatever   uninhibited   thing   she’s   convinced   lurks   around   inside   her  but   that   is   constantly   in   conflict   with   the   idea   that   she’s   fundamentally   undeserving   of   real   affection   ...   just  girly   things  you   know    🥺

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     WANTED  CONNECTIONS  !  (  all  open  to  all  genders  )

 my   brain   is   quite   literally   all   rot   rn   im   just   gonna   list   stuff   with  minimal   elaboration  please   vibe   with   me   ...

people   she   gets   high   with  <3   

ex   infatuations   that   ended   tragically   lets   get   that   angst

spare   parental   figures   ...   any   professors   out   there   want   a   demon   child   who   will   idolize   u   but   not   know   how   to   deal   with   that   so   they   just   act   up   all   the   while   hoping   for   forgiveness   and   the   attention   they   never   got   from   their   own   parents   </3      

speaking   of   professors   i   will   play   into   the   problematic  trope   of   a   student   being   obsessed   with   a   professor   -___-   solely   because  i   would   lov   to   have   gio   go   full   throttle   crazy   ...   as   a   treat   ...   this   has   nothing   to   do   with   that   one   line   in   lorde’s   writer   in   the   dark   u   know   the   one   truly   this   does   not   have   to   be   reciprocated   at   ALL            

a   confidant   /    someone   she   probably   considers   her   closest  friend   who   she   is   constantly  disgusted   with   herself   for   opening   up   to   but   also   truly   not   able   to   live   without   so   it’s   a   fun  cycle   of   push   and   pull   but  truly  she’d   probably  die  for   them  just   don’t  ask   her   that   she’ll   say   no   

i   think   it   would   be   fun   to    have   someone   who   knows   about   the   supposed   argenti   curse   maybe   their  family   had   some   associations   to   gio’s   or   maybe   they   spent   some  time  in  italy   at   some   point   growing   up   and   met   her   there   idk   im   cute   not   smart   ...

we’ve  all   been   begging  and  begging   i   will   jump   on   the   bandwagon   and   ask   for   a   sexy   rival   doesnt   mean   anything   if   u   say   i   hate  u   after   hooking  up     

someone   she   keeps   bumping   into  when   she’s   sneaking   out   past   curfew   or   cutting   class   and   at   first   it   was   like   dude   seriously   do   we   have   to   start   alternating   but   now   it   turned  into   like   wow   i   really   hope   we   bump   into   each   other   again   would   u   like   a  cigarette   wanna   listen   to   some   music   together   

 someone   she   sees   a   lot   at   stan’s   place   .   perhaps   on   campus   they   have   a   very   different  relationship   but   off   campus   they  feel   free   to  have   another

current   hookups   we   love   to   see   it   there’s   so   many   directions   to   go   in    maybe   its   purely   a   casual   thing   ,    maybe   it’s   casual   for   gio   but   not   for   them   ,   or    maybe   gio’s   the   one   like   worm   maybe   i  would   like   more   than   sex   ,    maybe   it’s   like   a   we   only   hookup   when   we’re   high   at   parties   thing  ,   perhaps   it’s   a   secret   hookup   thing   so   it   gets   angsty      

maybe   a   rival   or   someone   she   swears   she   hates   and   they   swear   the   same   but   they   accidentally   bond   along   the   way   and   it’s   like   well   i   thought   i   hated   u   but   perhaps  we   are   more   similar   than   we   thought   but   also   we   only   know   how   to   be  enemies  so   how   do   we   even   move   past   this   ...

perhaps   someone   gio   goes   to   when   she’s   especially   fucked   up   and   they   take   care   of   her   /   start   to   resent   her   for   seemingly   caring   so   little   abt   her   own   well   being   and   she   resents   them   for   caring   too  much   bc   it’s   not   liked   she   asked   but   she   keeps   showing   up   at   their   door   and   they   keep   letting   her   in   

someone   she   can   be   in   cahoots   with   ...   go   absolutely   bonkers   with   knowing   they   won’t   judge   her   and   she   won’t   judge   them

perhaps   someone   she   can   be   a   bad   influence   on

also   someone   who   makes   her   want   to   be   a   better   person   bc   we   need   balance

a   group   of   girls   gio   can   be   like   men   r   disgusting   with   but   then   they  catch   her   hooking   up   with   said   stinky   man   and   it’s   just   a   cycle   like   please   get   some  help  luv   

a   dealer   mayhaps   ?   

someone   whose   favorite   pen   she   stole   but   blatantly   lied   and   said   she   didn’t   steal   it   but   she   uses   it   everyday  in   class   so   u   know   she   did   in  fact   steal   ur   pen

ok   she’s   out   of   juice   i’m   she      

i   wont   lie   to   u   ive   been   writing   this   all  damn   day   …   but   we   finally   made   it   baby   😭😭😭   im   sosososo  sorry   for   the   length   &  the   wait   …   also   i   feel   like   my   charas   always   change   a  lil   once   i   actually   start   plotting   &   writing   so   sorry   again   if   u   see   me   finally   writing   as   giovanna   on   the   dash   and   ur   like   lit   rally   who   is   that   …  JSDBWJBDWBDJ   also   side   note   i   promise   u   im   almost  done   word   vomiting   all   over   the   place   but   it   must   b   said   ...   u   know   how   there’s   that   trope   that   supposed   insanity   is   like   not   always  real    like   how   female   hysteria   was   a   whole   as   thing   or   like   how   in   haunting   of   hill   house   where   the   charas   weren’t   really   haunted   by   ghosts   at   all   more   so   by   their   trauma   ...   that   was   my   whole   inspo   with   the   argenti’s   like   are   they   even  cursed   at   all   ?   who   is   to   say   ...   PLEASE  come  message  me  on  discord  to  plot   !   @ you are my soulmate ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ#8172   maybe  …   give   this   a   like   if   u   wanna   …   do   that   hehehe   thank   u   for   reading   all   this   ur   so   brave   for   that   stay   sexy   stan   loona  x  

[imaginesmai]

Jax Teller-Lucky (Zombie Apocalypse)

JAX TELLER- Z FOR ZOMBIE (FROM THE ANGST ALPHABET) 

I forgot to write down who requested this, but I know that at least two people (probably anon) along with @buckysjuicyplums (I know you requested some more, but I this was on my list of request and I thought I would tag you! I will have the rest when I have time) So, seeing that more than two people wanted this, I’ve done it quite long. Please, tell me if you like the idea, becuase I’m planning on a second part!

Plot: after the “fall”, everything turned out to be dangerous. You have been lucky enought to find Jax and a group.

The fall. That was how the first news called it; the fall of the humanity. When television or media still existed. They were the first ones to disappear, along with the governments and the army; they were all in the front when it happened. It started as a single man, which had become crazy in the streets. No one cared about him, just a drugged homeless man. He died in the hospital two days later of pneumonia. Only that it wasn’t pneumonia, it was an extremely dangerous virus that kept your body alive even when you died, and that turned you into a monster. The doctors and nurses who treated him went to their houses without knowing anything, talked with their families and slept with their partners. Not knowing they were spreading the fall.

By the time at least one thousands people had died in every country, the governments tried to solve it. They send the army, along with the media, to the places where the sick was being treated. It was only a way to give away more people to the virus; and soon, it was too late to save the humanity. In the short time of five months at least half of the population had become… things that walked searching for human flesh. Walkers, they called them. Along with the media and the army, the hospitals were the next to fall. When a year passed, every type of civilization you had ever knew was over.

You had been lucky, or so you thought. You used to live in an apartment in California, one of the first cities to fall. But you had managed to escape and found a group of people to survive with. Carol, a kind woman who cooked like heaven, and her son Jordan, a little boy of seven years who was the light of the group. There were also Marcus and Merritt, two brothers from Brazil who argued all the time. Chibs and Tig, two friends who loved too much women and guns, and Opie, who was literally a huge teddy bear. Lastly, it was Jax. He was the last addiction to your group along Opie, and you learned that they were buddies from the army. While Opie was cheerful and kind, Jax was rather silent and serious. But you wouldn’t have survived without him.

He was the stone of the group. When there was a discussion between Tig and Marcus, he stepped in between and put things in place. When you were surrounded by walkers, he always came up with a plan. And if you were running low on supplies, he got them from nearly nowhere. So, yeah, you had been kind of lucky.

“I’m tired, mom.” Jordan who was walking grippping Carol’s hand, complained. “When are we going to stop”

“Don’t worry, baby.” Carol answered. “It will be dark soon, no much longer”

“Maybe we should keep walking.” Marcus argued. Everyone scoffed at him, tired of his constant complaining. “It’s not a good idea to camp in the middle of nowhere.”

“We will find something soon.” Opie said. “If not, we can always stand guard.”

“Then don’t count with me.” Merritt scoffed. “I’m tired as fuck of sleeping on the hard ground, I’m not-“

“He said a bad word!” Jordan screamed, making everyone laugh except from the brothers. You looked back and smiled at the kid. He had two missing teeth, dirty cheeks and an adorable face that made everyone melt.

“I swear, kid, you’re-“

“We’re stopping here. “Tig said after looking at Jax. He was a few meters away from you, deep in the woods. You saw him giving Tig the thumbs up, meaning that he had found a safe place. One thumb, a safe place with walkers. Two thumbs, a safe place without walkers. You feared the day he wouldn’t give any thumbs up.

Everyone was too tired to complain. You had been walking since early morning, wanting to find some kind of refuge, as the last one was raided. You walked faster until you found what used to be a big warehouse. Jax was waiting for all of you in the front, with two dead walkers at his feet.

“Any more in there?” Opie asked, looking inside. He gripped his gun tighter, ready to attack.

“Nothing.” Jax said. “Two floors, many windows and a few cars. It will be more than enough for the night.”

After a last check from Tig and Marcus, you entered and prepared your things for the night. You put your sacks on the floor, all of them around a fire that you had stared with the help of Carol. The brothers took out a few cans of food from the last fuel station you had found, and even little Jordan ate knowing that there wasn’t much food left. Opie searched around for a bit, trying to find something useful. If you were to say, the place had been occupied by some group like you. There were some stains of fire in the ground, and in general it was too empty to be a place from before the fall.

As you were looking in a map, you felt a big shadow towering over you.

“I can’t see if you’re behind me, Jax.” you said, smiling. 

He kneeled behind you, putting his hands on your shoulders and giving them a soft squeeze. After a quick kiss on your forehead, he sat besides you in your sack.

“It could have been anyone else.” he stretched his legs. “I could have been a walker.”

“Walkers are much more silent than you, Teller.” you said. “If you keep carrying so many knives, you will be a tambourine.”

“You never know when they can save your live, darling.” he yawned, covering his mouth before Jordan could point him for not doing it. The little kid made sure manners were not lost in the new world. “Aren’t you going to sleep?”

“I want to find something first.” you sighed, turning to look at him.

Jax’s face had always been a wonder to you. Everytime you looked at him, you found something new. His messy blonde hair changed too many times; sometimes, he left it long, and then he would shave because he would feel like it. He had strange scars everywhere, not too big but enough that you could see them if you looked close enough. Depending of the light, his eyes could be green or blue. And if you were lucky, he would gave you a beautiful smile.

“I’ve noticed there used to be a military base here.” you pointed to the map. “It was abandoned before the fall, so maybe it’s closed. And if it’s closed, it should be safe.”

“Or it could be a walkers’ nest.” he frowned, looking at where you were pointing. “Everyone went to the military bases when the fall started. “

“Yeah, but-“

“And if they didn’t die there, it means they are still in there.” he said. “You know what that means, Y/N.”

“Sometimes the living are worse than the dead.” you sighed, repeating the words he had told you so many times. You had had a few encounters with living people, and most of them had tried to rob you, rape you or eat you alive. Without a government or laws, people were really becoming crazy.

You understood his protectiveness over the group. At first, no one cared about what he said; when you were a group of nearly twenty people. But everytime someone died, it turned out it could have been avoided with Jax’s advices. So in that moment Jax was the well-earned leader in the group, even if he didn’t want to say it.

“It’s better if we keep going.” Jax pointed to somewhere different. “It’s a little too far, but’s it’s worth the try.”

“What’s that?” you frowned, not seeing anything in the map. 

There was a huge blank on the map, possibily because it was made before whatever it was, was created. Anyway, it was big enough to be an ariport.

“It’s a mall. Opened shortly before the fall, so it must be full of things that can be useful.” he gripped your hand and gave it a soft squeeze. “I’m sure there will be books, we could find one you like.”

“But-Jax, it’s too far. It will take us too long, enough for the winter to arrive.” you worried. “You know what happened last winter.”

Everyone remembered the last winter. It had been the coldest since the fall, and none of you were prepared for it. One of Jax’s friends, Juice, had died during it. And probably most of you would have if it wasn’t for Jax and Opie. So, that winter, you were determinated to find a safe place.

“I know.” he sighed, remembering the blue lips, frozen fingers and pale faces. “We don’t have anything else, darling. I wish it could be any other way.”

You turned to him and, putting your hand on his cheek, kissed him. His lips, as yours, were dry, but neither of you cared. In a world where finding someone to love was nearly impossible, you were lucky enough. Jax put his hand on the back of your neck and kissed you deeper, making you tear apart with a small smile.

“Jordan is just a few meters away.” you chuckled.

“God, I can’t wait to have a little privacy.” he sighed, and pecked your lips again. “I’m going to talk to the guys, get in and I’ll be here in no time.”

“Okay.” you whispered against his lips.

Jax got up and walked away, leaving you cold and wishing for his warmth. Your relationship was nothing serious, you weren’t sure it was even a relationship. Sure, you had slept together and kissed always, but in the new world couples didn’t exist. Maybe in another time or world, things would have been different. Not wanting to think about it, you got into your sack and pulled up the zipper.

Little by little, everyone went to sleep. You heard Carol telling a story to Jordan, Merritt’s annoying snores and Tig’s breaths from your right. It seemed that Marcus and Chibs would be the ones in guard that night. Jax gave Opie one last look and then walked towards you. He left his coat next to your head, using it as a pillow. You didn’t have the privilege anymore of having pyjamas, lucky who got more than two pairs of jeans.

Jax got into the sack and you instantly wrapped yourself around him. Nuzzling your head against his neck, you left there a quick kiss before closing your eyes.

“You’re thinner.” Jax said, and you looked up. By his eyes, you knew he wasn’t going to let that go.

“It has been a couple of rough months, Jax.”

“No, it hasn’t. Everyone has been eating just right. We have enough food to have a heathy life, Y/N.”

You moved uncomfortably against his arms. Jax’s worry about the group, especially about you, was endlessly.

“Then I’m not thinner, Jax. It must be just you.” you sighed, wanting to sleep.

“I don’t think so.” you felt his hand under your pants, and you hit his chest playfully when he pinched your ass. “See? They’re so lose that I can fit my hand in here.”

The pants that you were wearing weren’t your size. In the past world, they must have belonged to another person, woman or men, with more hips than you. They were loose in your hips and you had to put them up with an old belt Carol found a few months ago. Still, they were warm and comfortable.

“That’s just a lame excuse to touch my ass.” you rolled your eyes and smiled at him.

“Seriously, Y/N.” he took his hand out and looked down at you. “It’s not about that and you know it. Although I would love to touch your beautiful ass in any other circumstances, I prefer talking about why are you so thin when you have enough food”

“There is nothing to worry about, I haven’t-“

“Jordan is not a quiet boy, you know.” he sighed, giving up. You looked down, knowing that it was a dead end, and waited for him to talk again. “I wanted to give you the chance to explain yourself, but I see you aren’t going to. Jordan has told me that you’re giving him your food.”

“I’ve seen Carol giving him her food too many times, Jax. Opie gives him some treats too, but his mother is always there for him. I-I can’t just stand while that kid and his mother are starving”

“They’re not starving, darling. Merritt and Marcus bring enough food for everyone. What Carol does with her son is not my business. I care about them, but not in the same way I care about you.” Jax said, lowering his voice so that no one heard your conversation.

“But-“

“No, Y/N. There are so many thing that can happen if you don’t eat. You could faint in the middle of a fight, or you won’t be able to run fast enough. There are a lot of illnesses you can catch.” Jax pressed you against him and kissed your head. “I can’t have you dead because I wouldn’t know what to do without you.”

“I’m just-.” you sighed and let the silence run for a few seconds before talking again. “Jordan is still so young. He should have a normal childhood. And-And Carol is trying to hard to make him happy. I just want to help.”

Jax noticed how your voice broke and how your fist closed in his shirt, and he took a deep breath. It hurt him that you were so good in a rotten world, it only gave your problems. Since the beginning, he had thought you were kind of silly. He was used to the army, where everyone looked for themselves and gave hard words to the weak. You had been patient with the others, and always cared about the weakest ones. At the same time, it made him angry and love you more.

“Maybe we can look up that army base.” he gave you a half smile. “If it’s empty, it can be a good place to spend the winter.”

You moved so that you practically were laying on him, with bright eyes. He knew how much it meant to you being useful to the group, being able to help in making the big decisions. Jax chuckled at your hopeful eyes, and kissed you once more. His lips moved against yours slowly, enjoying the peace of the moment. Just when he thought it would be too hard to pull away, you did.

“Don’t get your hopes up, as I told you it might be too dangerous.” he warned you. “We will just take a look in the distance, see if it’s safe.”

“It’s enough for me.” you kissed his cheek. “It can be a good place to spend the winter in.”

“Yeah.” he smiled, giving up against your hope.

Even with the heat of the fire, the warehouse was still too cold. Some teeth chattering could be heard, probably from Opie or Jordan, and the wind blew hard against the windows. You snuzzled your cold nose in Jax’s neck, and felt him pulling you even closer. You were really lucky.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning you woke up to a cloudy sky. It must had rained as you were sleeping, because some parts of the ground were soaked. The ceiling of the warehouse was broken in some parts, and the place was even colder. Winter was hot on your heels. The snow hadn’t appeared yet, but you knew it was a matter of time before the ice and the freezing temperatures made you slow down.

As you rose from your sack, you saw that you weren’t the last one to wake up. Carol was still sleeping in her sack, Jordan tucked on her side. Merritt snored beside you and you could see Opie sleeping on his side. Your sack was still warm, so that meant Jax had to be somewhere around. Putting on your old boots, you walked towards Marcus, who was cooking some animal on the fire.

“Hey.” you said, not receiving an answer. “What are you cooking?”

There were a few seconds of silence until he talked. Marcus was a big guy, shaved and with a weird moustache. Before Jax and Opie came into the group, the brothers used to take the lead. But deep down they were good people, and even if they butted heads with everyone, just wanted the best for you.

“You call this cooking?” he scoffed. “This is just not dying from raw meat.”

“Well, how are you saving us from dying from raw meat?” you let out a little laugh, attempting to light a little the mood.

“It’s rabbit. Not that there is much variety of food here, princess.” Marcus said. He had started calling you that name when he discovered you were still a student at university; a white young girl. For him, your kind was the cause of the fall probably.

“I’m not complaining, Marcus.” you rolled your eyes. “Have you seen Jax?”

“Of course you would want to complain to him”

“Why are you in such a mood?” you asked, crossing your arms.

Marcus didn’t answer you, just mumbled something under his breath and looked away. You were sure that attitude of him would be his death. You walked around for a bit, talked to Chibs who was on guard in the main door and laughed with Tig. They told you that Jax had left just some minutes ago to take a look around; so, after taking your knife, you stepped outside to look for him.

The trees were tall and the big leaves whistled loudly. The sun wasn’t anywhere, and you swore that soon it could rain. Maybe it was because that smell that only some people noticed, but each second you were more sure of it. After more than fifteen minutes walking, you found Jax crouched down next to a tree. You made yourself known by calling him quietly, not wanting to drag to yourself unwanted attention.

“What are you doing here?” you frowned, crouching beside him. From where you were, you could see at least fifty kilometres ahead you. It was a really big cliff.

“I should be the one asking you that. Don’t you know that it’s dangerous walking alone in the woods? Someone might have seen you, or something”

“I have my knife with me” you smiled, showing him the bloodied blade. “Sure, I ran into some walkers on my way, but you had taken care of everything, didn’t you?”

“Still.” he scoffed. None of you said anything, and you waited for Jax to answer your original question. Feeling your eyes on his face, he sighed. “I’ve been thinking all night about the military base. It’s in a good position, can you see it?”

He was pointing to somewhere between the trees, and you finally caught on what he was talking about. It was a small round base, but you guessed it was just the top of the iceberg. The position of the building had probably made it go unnoticed, so it was a good sign.

“I’ve been looking at it for a while” Jax whispered. “I haven’t seen any movement, from walkers or people”

“That means it’s safe” you said, turning your face to look at him.

His comforting smile was all you needed to tackle him to the ground. Jax complained at first, yet he wrapped his arms around you. It had been months of walking without really knowing where you were going, months of sleeping with one eye open and endless fights against the walkers. The possibility of catching a break was too good to hide your excitement.

Soon, you started rambling about it. How good would it be to feel the warmth of a closed place. The possibility of a bed or even energy to heat the food. Normal showers, everything was too good to be true.

Jax looked at you with a silly smile on his face, looking at your lips and feeling his heard full of love. It was what you deserved, what everyone in that group deserved. You had been lucky until then, and you really believed that you would be even luckier. As you gripped Jax’s cheeks and kissed him deeply, you two missed the growing feeling in your stomachs that your luck was about to end.

Want to know more about me? Here is my Masterlist! Feedback is always appreciated!!

[emikvs]

﹤𝙽𝙰𝙽𝙰 𝙺𝙾𝙼𝙰𝚃𝚂𝚄, 𝚂𝙷𝙴 / 𝙷𝙴𝚁, 𝙲𝙸𝚂 𝙵𝙴𝙼𝙰𝙻𝙴﹥; * - hello EMIKO " EMI " SATO. long time no see. i know a lot about you. like how you're TWENTY ONE, how you're a CLASSICS major,  and in fact.. how you LIE AND TELL EVERYONE YOU STUDIED ABROAD FOR A YEAR WHEN YOU WERE ACTUALLY IN REHAB. would be a shame if it got out, wouldn't it ? so let's play a game. 𝚃𝚁𝚄𝚃𝙷 𝙾𝚁 𝙳𝙰𝚁𝙴 ?

*itzy vc* hey hey hey ! SDBJWBDJW what’s up......its xan aha ... this is gonna be the biggest mess ever ...just winging it as i go. and u know what ? thats on on brand babey ! lets get it ...TW: drug use/mention, accidents/hospitalization ( just in case)

backstory

virginia born and raised babey ! she’s the youngest of five siblings and ...it shows. SJDBJWBDJW growing up would have been pretty chaotic had it not been for the fact that her dad was a pretty well-respected police officer in their town ! him & her mom were high school sweethearts which made no damn sense to emiko considering they’re still happily married...the concept just seems fake to her </3

while her parents had a lot of  mushy love for each other, when it came to their kids they opted to take a more emotionally distanced kind of parenting style bc they didnt wanna like spoil their kids or anything but.....it wasnt exactly the best plan ! emi and all her siblings just learned to be very good liars JDSBWBDJW as kids with strict parents do

being the youngest emi took a while to get into her rebellious phase. for a while she’d just watch her older siblings sneak out and party and do walks of shame and all that jazz...and while she was always down to help them get out of trouble none of them ever really trusted her ? since she was the baby they figured she’d be the most likely to snitch which just made her really ///: bc she wanted to be included so bad

flash forward to senior year of high school and finally emi’s like . okay fuck this it’s MY turn ! her dad had recently decided to get into politics with some encouragement from the police chief so he was busy with his career and her mom was busy helping him. it was the perfect time to do what she wanted since it was less likely she’d get caught

so she goes to this graduation party.....and it’s BAD like she gets fucked up & carried away so she calls her oldest sister ( who had come back into town for emi’s graduation ) to come pick her up & on the way to get emi from this house party, her sister ends up getting into an accident 

she didn’t die though JSBJDSBBWJDBWJDBJWDW just broke some stuff and ended up needing surgery ): and emi obviously got busted that night by her parents which ... wasnt pretty at all especially bc they low key blamed her for her sister’s accident which just made emi feel like pure shit babey ! 

visiting her sister in the hospital is what kinda sparked her fear of hospitals ! bc emi was like super guilty and paranoid that maybe her sister was gonna die or her surgery would go wrong and she’d essentially be at fault...it was just a lot of anxiety that turned into a genuine phobia of hospitals after that

but her sister made it she was okay and her dad used all the buzz and tragedy around his family to kinda boost his political career....which was ugly. her sister had been prescribed some pretty heavy pain killers for the pain & thats where things got.....messy

emi isnt sure when exactly it started but between the guilt she was harboring over her sister’s accident, the stress from her parents as her dad got further and further into virginia politics as well as college anxiety since she was about to start at the universoty of virginia.....she stole some oxy and thats what started what would be a very messy and tumultuous addiction  

as soon as she started college, emi felt as if some of the weight had been lifted. she was living away from her family for the first time and dorming so she promised herself she’d take these four years to grow and figure out who she is......except that didnt exactly happen. instead of exploring herself in a healthy way, emi was using drugs as a sort of escapism from her “old” self. she’s extremely smart and she loves her major, but her professors would often comment her papers had the energy of a “rambling and troubled mind”. by the time she was about to finish her sophomore year she was getting so high people would find her literally passed out in the dining hall. but no one was that worried bc for a good two years, she was a pretty high functioning addict. 

cue the summer after sophomore year when emi overdoses at a party. she woke up in a private hospital room with only her father sitting on the couch, the look on his face something she’ll never forget. while him and her mother knew exactly what happened to emi, they hadn’t told any of her siblings. or anyone at all, for that matter. instead her dad had informed the university emi would be taking a year off to privately study abroad and told emi that’s what she was going to tell people bc he’d just decided to run for mayor ! he essentially guilt-tripped her into thinking telling people the truth would be a selfish act, and one that would basically ruin the family reputation and make everyone really miserable JSDWDBWBDJW he also tells her she’s gonna be shipped off to rehab ! 

so she goes to rehab for a good seven months. everyone at school thinks she’s studying abroad in italy, and emi is literally just counting the days til she can go back home to her dorm bc she’s lonely !!! in rehab !!! and she gets that she should take it seriously but shes just so mad at her dad and herself and the world too ig ... just some good old fashioned angst ! but she finishes rehab and her dad got elected as mayor of her hometown in virginia and shes like good for u can i go back to school please JSBDWJDBJW and he says yes

so she’s back ! ready for the universe to give her a break.....ahaha.....

personality + tidbits

so emi......my baby......she’s a strange one. she’s that bitch that’s super nerdy but in the weirdest way like the stuff she’s into is so specific and just....generally stuff literally no one else would care about but to emi it’s like holy shit this is the coolest thing in the world JSBDJWBDJWBJD she knows a little about a lot so she has the tendency to come across as pretentious if you don’t know her outside of class when in reality she’s just read one too many random facts. also weird in the sense that she’s a STRONG believer in the paranormal and in aliens and in witchcraft and stuff like that as well as believing in things that seem “logical”. it can be confusing to people who view that stuff as silly that someone so smart would be into it. 

speaking of smart.....she’s a polygot which basically means she can speak a bunch of languages ! she’s self-taught, and since she’s a classics major some of her favorites to study include greek and latin ( dead language who ? ). she’s pretty chill about it though and if you wanted to learn she’d be the type that’s 100% down to teach you. she always learns the curse words first just you know....for the fun of it ! she probably has very specific “pet names” for everyone in the friend group in random languages 

anyway she’s also stupid. ASDJWBDWBJDBWJDWJD i mean like in the way that she makes the most .... impulsive decisions that usually have negative consequences. she’s the type to convince herself she knows exactly what she’s then come up with the worst plan you have ever heard in your life. an example of a dumb decision emi has made ? your girl ate a pot brownie the day after she got back in her dorm after rehab bc she convinced herself it was a good way to de-stress. some other dumb decisions include various drunk tattoos ( which thankfully haven’t been too bad save for the words eat me tattooed in small font on her ass ). also owns a stick & poke gun so she’s for sure tried to tattoo friends while intoxicated despite.....not being a tattoo artist ... she’s not even an art student .... SJBDJWBDJW....but she’s very very good at convincing people to join in on her dumb antics so be weary

big on photography !!! she loves taking pictures. always that one friend who reminds you to document the moment and you get annoyed but then when you want to post a picture on insta you’re thankful she was there <3 she has the energy of like .... the dad friend when you need support JSDBWBDJWBDJW she tries to be caring but it just turns into like ... emi high off her ass putting her hand on your shoulder and being like “you know fuck it man you’re amazing” not that good at the emotional stuff like she really wants to be but she legit doesn’t know how.......kinda accidentally turned into an emo kid bc she channels her feelings though some kick ass playlists and the notes app in her iphone instead of talking to people JSBDJWBJDBWJDBJ 

she’s high key struggling but she’s the type to be like no its fine this is fine life is a ride babey better hold on ! tries to keep things flirty and fresh 99% of the time but then you’ll witness the rare emi breakdown which.....involves a whole lot of tweets that will all be deleted within 24 hours and emi will in fact deny they ever existed

really a laid-back girl but the chaotic energy is there folks......she can also very easily get into her youngest child complex if she’s upset which just involves emi being a pain in the ass and everyone having to deal with it JSBDWBDJWBDJWBDJW  she likes to make it hard to say no to her.....not exactly manipulative but sometimes she can get close /: not listed in her fears but she is in fact scared of genuine love and affection ! it’s like she craves it so much she’s terrified abt what will happen if she ever gets it.......so she makes sure she’s never in danger of that by never getting into anything serious.....but then at night shes like damn . kinda want a freak to hold my hand rn and tell me they love me ... JSDBWBDJWBDJWBJDWJDW it’s all fun and games.............

ok thats it im done rambling.................this is so long..............and for what !!!!! i made her more of a clown than i intended but thats okay (: JSDBJWBDWJDBWJ emi might hate clowns but im embracing them ! 

[semellark]

night changes

on AO3!

Tags: Fluff, Angst, Jealousy, Dreams, Dialogue Heavy, couples talking through their feelings is my kink

Makoto’s lungs are on fire as he pulls himself from the pool, accepting the hand Rei offers him to steady himself. The water splashes loudly behind them as Nitori dives into the pool just a few seconds after Nagisa.

Makoto’s surprised that he managed to get them the lead at all. He hasn’t been swimming nearly as often as Momotarou surely has, so he’s undoubtedly out of shape, and the way his body feels certainly confirms that.

But even so, Makoto feels good. It’s been almost three years since he swam in any sort of relay and nearly five since his last competitive swim meet. He forgotten how good they can feel, how satisfying it is to form this cohesive unit with three of his favorite people. It’s the sort of high that could easily get addicting, and Makoto understands why Haru loves swimming so much, if this is how he feels whenever he’s in the water.

He tries to catch Haru’s eye, but his boyfriend’s attention is focused solely on the pool as Nagisa and Rei seamlessly perform their trade-off as they have dozens of times before. Makoto can’t help but smile, happy that Haru is so into this. He hardly gets to race for fun anymore, not with his training and travel schedule. Putting this race together at all was nothing short of a miracle since they’re all older and have their own lives now.

But if anything was going to force everyone to make time in their busy schedules, it was going to be a chance at an Iwatobi vs. Samezuka rematch.

They end up winning by the skin of their teeth. Haru and Rin are more evenly matched now than ever before, so it was anyone’s guess as to who would reach the starting block first. Haru reaches it a few milliseconds before Rin, and Makoto finds himself sandwiched between Nagisa and Rei as they hug him, shrieking in delight like they’re sixteen again and care about nothing but the race.

Haru takes off his cap and goggles and shakes out his hair, so eerily similar to everything Makoto remembers about these relays. Even if he hasn’t done this in a while, Makoto steps forward on instinct, ready to reach out and pull Haru from the pool, but when Makoto blinks next… Rin is there.

Makoto wants to ask how Rin got out of the water so fast. He wants to ask a lot of things but strangely feels like it isn’t his place. He just resolves to let Rin haul Haru up and move on, to not overreact and make this into a bigger deal than it actually is.

Makoto wants to brush it off. Really, he does. But then Rin leans down the slightest bit to press his lips to Haru’s and all logical thought just drains straight out of Makoto’s head.

There are no words to describe how Makoto feels as he takes in the scene before him. He can’t seem to get his body to move, limbs running cold for reasons entirely unrelated to the water still dripping off his body.

His eyes flit to Nagisa and Rei – surely he isn’t the only one who sees how wrong this is – but Rei is only turning his face away to give the pair privacy while Nagisa makes exaggerated kissing noises at them.

Sousuke, Makoto thinks, beginning to feel desperate, Sousuke will definitely put a stop to this since Makoto can’t seem to move. But Sousuke just looks bored, regarding Rin and Haru with the same detached wariness he had when they were in high school, not with the hot ire of a jealous boyfriend.

Makoto’s gut drops, pulse beating out of control as he struggles to make sense of the situation. Some part of him knows – hopes prays – that he’s only dreaming. He had dreams like this when he was younger, although they were more like nightmares, with Makoto unable to move as Rin came back from Australia and swept Haru up faster than Makoto could’ve conceivably stopped him.

But Makoto feels more despair now than he ever did back then, because now he knows how it feels to have Haru to himself. He knows how it feels to sleep together in a bed they picked out and paid for themselves. Makoto knows to keep their Sunday nights free every week from five to six so Haru can call his parents, and he knows that despite being able to swim whenever he feels like it, Haru really doesn’t care for the life of an Olympic swimmer all that much.

And Makoto loves Rin like a brother, but he doesn’t think Rin could ever fully understand Haru’s complicated relationship with swimming. It took Makoto a long time to even begin to grasp it, to learn how Haru struggles with the agitation of being made to perform, even when he loves the water so much.

It doesn’t make sense. Things were perfect, so why is Makoto suddenly back here?

“You killed it, Haru,” Rin says, voice warbling with adrenaline and excitement, Makoto’s polar opposite in this moment. “You’re the only person I could ever enjoy losing to.”

And Haru just. Smiles. A soft, delicate thing that makes his eyes seem all the bluer, and the speed with which Makoto begins to cry is almost frightening, because Haru only ever looks at him like that.

“Stop,” Makoto manages to croak out, lifting a hand to reach for Haru in a last-ditch effort to stop this –

There’s a brief moment of disconnect where Makoto feels as if he’s been separated into two bodies, but then he blinks and he’s on his back in bed, arm outstretched and reaching for the darkened ceiling above him.

Makoto lets his arm fall back down to the bed, landing with a soft thump that somehow manages to ring in Makoto’s ears. He’s not entirely shocked to find that he’s actually crying, hot tears slipping down his temples and pooling at his hairline.

And he hates this. He’s twenty-two years old and he absolutely hates this –

“Makoto?” Haru is awake. He’s never been a very deep sleeper, but even so, his voice is quiet and raspy, utterly exhausted after a long day of training; and doesn’t that just make Makoto feel like the worst human being alive.

“’m fine,” Makoto mumbles before Haru can say anything else. He doesn’t roll onto his side to meet his boyfriend’s eyes, because he knows what Haru will find. “Just had a dream.”

Haru is quiet for a few moments, but Makoto doesn’t pretend to hope that this will be the end of the conversation. The bed dips just underneath his left elbow as Haru props himself up on a forearm, staring down at Makoto through half-lidded eyes. “What about?” He asks, and Makoto could just laugh for hours over how well they know each other, even when they’re tired and literally surrounded by darkness.

“I don’t remember it very well,” Makoto says. He doesn’t know why he lies. It doesn’t sit well with him, leaves a sour taste in his mouth. He doesn’t lie to Haru, not ever. They tell each other everything, no matter how small.

Haru obviously isn’t buying it. He lets out a soft grunt as he repositions himself, sliding closer to Makoto underneath the sheets. Makoto tries not to flinch as the back of Haru’s fingers brush against his cheek, and although he mostly succeeds, he isn’t very happy about it.

There’s nothing Makoto loves more than burrowing into Haru’s arms after a tough day, but not when he feels like this, gross and disgusting and not at all himself.

“You’re sweating like crazy,” Haru says, sounding much more alert than before. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah, I – “ Makoto trails off. His eyes have mostly adjusted to the gloom by now. He can make out Haru’s face above him, sees his furrowed brow and downturned mouth, and Makoto can’t take it. He feels impossibly guilty, although he’s done nothing wrong and knows it for a fact. “Well, I just – “

Haru stays quiet and waits. He hasn’t withdrawn his hand, just strokes the damp fringes of Makoto’s bangs off his forehead so they aren’t in his eyes. Haru is so patient and kind with him, even when Makoto doesn’t think he deserves it – especially when Makoto doesn’t think he deserves it.

“My dream was just… upsetting,” Makoto says at length, thankful that Haru doesn’t comment on how he just suddenly remembers what he’d been dreaming of. “It felt real. Too real.”

Haru hums low in his throat, fingers digging gently into Makoto’s scalp in the same way he does with their cats. “You don’t have to tell me,” he says, but just when Makoto is ready to close his eyes and forget that this even happened, he adds, “But I wish you would.”

“You’re not being fair,” Makoto murmurs, and Haru just shrugs one shoulder like he already knew that but doesn’t care. “You’re going to get upset, Haru.”

“Then I’ll be upset, Makoto.” Haru scoots even closer so their bodies are almost completely touching, hunching down to press his forehead to the spot just above Makoto’s left eye. “Tell me. Please.”

Makoto sighs, just wants to curl up in a ball and breathe until he feels like himself again, but that’s obviously not going to happen. “We were swimming a relay,” Makoto explains, breath leaving him in delicate exhales as he struggles to remember how he’d gotten from points A to B. “It was just us and the Samezuka team. We won, and I tried to pull you out like I usually did, but. Rin got in the way.”

Saying it out loud makes Makoto feel more like a crazy, jealous boyfriend than he already did. And he’s not used to feeling this way, because he knows Haru is just as committed to their relationship as he is. For Makoto, there’s only ever been Haru. And Makoto knows that for Haru, there’s only ever been him. But he didn’t know that when he was seventeen, and right now, Makoto very much feels like he’s seventeen again.

“He pulled you out and kissed you,” Makoto says in a rush, as if it isn’t obvious to the both of them that this is the real heart of the issue, “and no one thought it was weird aside from me.”

Haru doesn’t pull away from him. He doesn’t even seem to be breathing, although Makoto can feel brief puffs of air against his jaw. “And what did I do?” asks Haru, just when Makoto thinks the silence might get to be too much for him. “When Rin kissed me, how did I react?”

“You let him,” Makoto admits, hoping he doesn’t sound as heartbroken as he feels. He doesn’t want Haru to think he’s accusing him of anything, not because of some stupid dream. “And you looked at him like he was me.”

Haru’s next inhale is sharp and violent. It almost startles Makoto, how quickly Haru reacts to what he’s said, drawing away from Makoto like he’d physically slapped him. “We can talk about it tomorrow,” Makoto blurts out, half panicked. “It was just a stupid dream, we both know it didn’t mean anything.”

“No,” Haru says, voice hard. “We’re talking about it now.”

“Haru, it’s… two in the morning,” Makoto replies after glancing at the digital clock on his bedside table. “You have a workout in three hours.”

Haru sits up completely, and for a moment, Makoto thinks he’s going to get out of bed. But he only shuffles onto his knees before slinging a leg over Makoto’s body and sitting back on his thighs. Makoto can’t quite see the peculiarities of Haru’s expression, but he stares at Haru’s face enough to imagine how he looks right then, some awful balance between outraged and heartbroken.

“I wouldn’t,” Haru says fiercely. He’s mainly just a looming shadow in the dark, but Makoto feels pinned by the weight of a stare he can hardly see. “Never in a million years. Not if he and I were the only two people on the planet.”

“I know, Haru,” Makoto insists. He feels almost sad on Rin’s behalf, although he knows Rin would say the exact same thing about Haru if Sousuke was the one having concerns. “I told you, it was stupid.”

“It isn’t,” Haru snaps, but he must feel badly about it, because when he speaks next, his voice is significantly softer. “It isn’t, Makoto. Your feelings aren’t stupid.”

“But I don’t feel like that!” Makoto was worried Haru would take this the wrong way. That’s why he didn’t want to talk about his dream at all, but he just can’t say no to Haru. “I don’t know why I had that dream, I haven’t worried about it since we were in high school.”

Haru seems to pull up short at that, and Makoto is only confused for a moment before he stills in dawning horror.

“Makoto,” Haru murmurs. He sounds lost, like he does when he tries to console Nagisa after he drinks too much and cries about the littlest things. “I didn’t know you’d ever worried about that at all.”

Somehow Makoto feels as if he’s committed the ultimate betrayal. The two of them don’t lie to each other, not after they spent so long dancing around their feelings and hurting one another through miscommunication and stubbornness. The reason they get on so well is because they’ve been together for so long, but even they aren’t mind readers.

They have to talk to each other to avoid the risk of bottling up their feelings in some misguided attempt to maintain the status quo. That’s just part of being adults in a healthy, functioning relationship.

But Makoto’s jealousy toward Rin is something he’s kept bottled up for a long time, something he’d never intended to tell Haru because of how ugly and disgusting it makes him feel.

To be honest, Makoto had thought that it wasn’t an issue anymore, not now when things are going so well for everyone. Apparently, he isn’t as in-tune with his own thoughts and emotions as he’d thought.

Makoto swallows past the lump forming in his throat. He hadn’t meant to expose his best kept – and only – secret, but he can talk about it. He can. “It was just hard, back then,” Makoto admits quietly. “I worried about a lot of things. Most of them were just in my head. It had nothing to do with you.”

He doesn’t feel like he’s lying, but Haru obviously disagrees, judging from the way he shakes his head so violently it jostles them on the bed. “It had everything to do with me,” he says. “I remember how I treated you back then. You had no reason to think that I loved you.”

“You’re wrong,” Makoto shoots back. “I had a lot of reasons to think that. Looking back now, it’s so obvious to me. But back then, I – I never noticed any of it. Or I just didn’t take your actions for what they were.”

This is something he believes whole-heartedly. He often feels stupid for never noticing how Haru felt about him before they moved to Tokyo. It’s blatant now, when he thinks about how Haru used to watch him, no matter what he was doing. Or how Haru hated almost all contact with human beings after Rin left but still let Makoto enter his house uninvited almost every day.

A lot of what Makoto used to pass off as being familial closeness had always been a part of their dynamic, so he guesses that it makes a bit of sense that it took him a while to notice. But even back then, Haru loved Nagisa and Rei like family, and he never really acted that way with either of them. And now Makoto can see that Rin was and is more like a brother to Haru, complete with the competitiveness and good-natured bickering that Makoto and Haru never experienced.

So, there was really never any reason for Makoto to be jealous or insecure, but that doesn’t change the fact that it happened. And now he has to deal with it.

Makoto startles as Haru slumps forward, almost dropping down onto Makoto’s chest and burying his face in the curve between Makoto’s neck and shoulder. “Did I… do something?” Haru asks, voice achingly soft and vulnerable, and Makoto’s heart breaks all over again. “To make you feel like this again?”

“No!” Makoto exclaims, finally regaining some semblance of control over his exhausted and tension riddled body to lift his arms and wrap them around Haru’s shoulders. “No, Haru, you haven’t done anything, I promise. I told you, I haven’t felt that way in years.”

Haru relaxes into his embrace just like Makoto hoped he would, nuzzling into the slightly damp fabric of Makoto’s t-shirt and sighing. “Can’t believe you were jealous of Rin,” Haru grumbles, and Makoto winces, because yeah, those weren’t his finest moments. “How come you never told me?”

“How could I?” Makoto asks as he rubs his boyfriend’s back. “I thought you were pining over him, and then by the time I realized you weren’t, we were practically already a couple.”

“We’ve always been a couple, Makoto.”

“I was embarrassed,” Makoto continues, pointedly ignoring Haru's comment, because they’ve already had that discussion many times in the past and have agreed to disagree. “I didn’t see the point in bringing it up, and I just. I hated how that jealousy made me feel about myself. I didn’t want you to see me that way.”

“What way?”

“I don’t know, just… I didn’t feel like myself in those moments. I felt ugly.”

Haru shakes his head against Makoto’s collarbone before pushing himself up with his forearms against Makoto’s chest. Makoto slides his hand down to Haru’s waist and squeezes, nervous for whatever’s going to come out of his boyfriend’s mouth next.

“I’m jealous of Kisumi.”

Makoto blinks up at Haru. For a moment, he thinks that this is just a joke, but he dismisses the thought quickly. This is Haru, and Haru rarely jokes. “What?”

“I’m jealous of him,” Haru repeats. “I have been since junior high.”

“Since junior – Haru! I didn’t know that!”

“I know,” Haru says with a sigh, and maybe Makoto would be offended if he didn’t sound so fond. “Trust me, I know.”

“But why?”

“I hate him.”

“No, you don’t, Haru.”

“I hate him,” Haru insists. “I hate how he talks to you. And he touches you all the time, even when I’m around.”

Makoto has to laugh at that one. “He’s like that with everyone, including you.”

“And he can be like that with whoever he wants,” Haru says firmly, “so long as it isn’t you. Or me. But preferably you.”

The laughter just keeps on coming, so strong they both shake with it. Haru is so obviously serious about this, staring straight into Makoto’s eyes like this is something of grave importance. It’s just too ridiculous to not laugh. “How did we even get here, Haru?”

“Because you’re being unreasonable. And unfair to yourself,” Haru says once Makoto’s quiet laughter has subsided. “If you think being jealous makes you ugly, then what does that make me? Because you may not be jealous of Rin anymore, but I’m still jealous of Kisumi.”

The last part is more alarming to Makoto than anything else that’s happened tonight. “Still? You’re still jealous of Kisumi?”

Haru shrugs. “I probably always will be.”

“But why? You have to know I’ve never even thought about him that way.”

“Yeah, I know. But it doesn’t make me feel any better.” Makoto realizes that this must be hard for Haru to admit. From the sound of it, he’s been harboring this jealousy toward Kisumi for even longer than Makoto was ever jealous of Rin. “He’s more obvious about his affection toward people. If you were with him, he’d always show it, no matter where you were.”

“Don’t say that,” Makoto begs quietly. “Don’t even think those things.”

“I try not to,” Haru admits. “But it’s difficult, sometimes. And I don’t really hate Kisumi all that much, I just kinda wish I could be like him.”

Makoto tries to imagine Haru talking even nearly as much as Kisumi does, or laughing as loudly, smiling as much, throwing himself at as many people, and… yeah, Makoto never really wants to contemplate that version of Haru again. Haru is special because his laughter is rare and his smile is precious, his friendship worth more weight because he doesn’t give it as freely.

And that isn’t to say that Kisumi isn’t as good a person because he has all those things, but if it really came down to it, Makoto would choose Haru and his reserved, careful affection every time.

“I didn’t tell you to make you feel guilty,” Haru says, dragging Makoto out of his own thoughts, “and I don’t want you to stop being friends with Kisumi or anything. I just want you to realize that we’re the same. You don’t think any less of me because of how I feel about him, do you?”

“Never,” Makoto swears. He doesn’t even have to think about it.

Haru nods slowly, mouth quirked in a small half smile that Makoto wants to bite. “And I don’t see you any differently now that I know how you used to feel about Rin. You don’t have to worry, Makoto. Not about us, not about me, and not about yourself.”

Makoto’s been telling himself the same thing for years now, but hearing it in the low, smooth cadence of Haru’s voice makes it seem doable. Like the unkind thoughts in Makoto’s head are something he can actually manage and argue against.

Everything is easier with Haru. Makoto doesn’t know how he could’ve forgotten that, even if he was asleep.

“I love you,” Makoto sighs, tugging Haru back down to lie against his chest. “You’re easily the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“Love you, too. Even if you get dramatic when you're tired,” Haru says. “I can’t believe you were jealous of Rin.”

“I know.”

“He crumples his toilet paper when he wipes, you know.”

“Why do you even know that?” Makoto laughs, nuzzling his head against Haru’s and tightening his grip on him as he rolls them onto their sides. “Don’t answer that. I don’t wanna know what you guys got up to in Rio.”

“We sat in our hotel when we weren’t competing and complained about how much we missed our boyfriends,” Haru says pointedly, trying and failing to squirm away when Makoto presses a too wet kiss to his cheek. “And discussed our bathroom habits, I guess. I don’t know. We were drunk a lot.”

They mostly settle down after that, although Makoto doesn’t release his hold on Haru. His heart feels too big for his chest in an entirely different way now, one that Makoto actually kind of enjoys. He loves being like this with Haru, just the two of them in their bed, neither of them putting on a show for anyone else. Makoto has to share his boyfriend with the whole world these days, but that makes these moments between them – good or bad – all the more precious to him.

“Jealous of Rin,” Haru says again, like a scratched record. Makoto gets the sense that he’s never going to live this one down. “Can’t wait to tell Nagisa.”

“He probably already knows,” Makoto murmurs into Haru’s hair. “He’s the most perceptive person we know.”

“You’re probably right.”

They fall asleep just like that, Makoto clinging to Haru like he's a dakimakura and Haru drooling into the fabric of Makoto’s shirt. It feels like no time has passed when Haru’s alarm goes off a few hours later, startling the both of them into consciousness with little regard to how emotionally drained they feel.

And when Haru turns the alarm off and dives right back into Makoto’s arms instead of heading for the shower like he should be doing, Makoto lets him.

Because Haru is his. And today, Makoto just doesn’t really feel like sharing.

[kik0enai]

MysMes secondary genders (A/B/O)

Felt like listing my personal headcanons for everyone’s secondary genders in Mystic Messenger! some of these, I’m not entirely sure of. :’) Some characters have so many sides to them hahaaa

Zen - Alpha

He’s gorgeous and he knows it. I feel like the base instincts for typical alpha’s are there. He’s nurturing towards weaker ones, protective towards women (not going into arguments about his sexual orientation, only stating what we know from the game) and his lovers. He knows very well how to seduce someone. He likes showing what he’s made of. He really likes putting himself out there. Also don’t forget about the beast within. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  And he’s so competitive and almost agressive towards other men with the ‘all men are wolves’ stuff.

Yoosung - Alpha

Might seem out of character but I headcanon Yoosung as an alpha for fun though I also feel like it COULD suit him!

Yoosung is young and probably inexperienced. The whole situation with Rika and V is no help to his mental state at all. Of course he’ll be unstable and dependent sometimes. He’s traumatized. But he’s still so brave and strong. Yoosung is also super good at the things he does. He goes to uni and makes it through even though he’s heavily addicted to gaming so he’s probably smart as heck (not saying you have to be smart to be an alpha) and super determined. Also he’s a guild leader for one of LOLOL’s strongest guilds? And again, he’s so stubborn and selfless when he discovers that MC is in danger. And what he did at the end of Another Story was amazing. He’s also constantly trying to prove himself and working to become stronger and more useful. He wants to be somebody who others can rely on.

Jaehee - Omega

She feels sooo pressured to perfectly fit into her spot in society. All her life, she let people trample over and manipulate her. She sticks with her job as Jumin’s secretary and has no idea she’s capable of so much more. She’ll go to the point of extremely adjusting herself and her lifestyle to her job. She’s not allowed to just walk away from that. She has to put up a fight first. And in her route, fighting is exactly what she does. Next to being overly obedient and responsible, she’s also very nurturing and caring. If you’re close to her, she’ll give you everything you need and she’ll always be there for you. She’s the mom friend in the RFA. I can only see her as an omega. Not the textbook version of one, though. I feel like she really has it in her to defend herself if need be.

707/Luciel/Saeyoung - Alpha/Beta

My headcanon for Seven really switches from one thing to another. It depends on the mood I’m in I think haha

He could be a Beta because he’s both a leader and a follower. In the game’s story, he’s a follower because he works under Vanderwood. He submits himself to a boss while working for such a risky job and the responsibility and loyalty that comes with it must be immense. But in the RFA he also really takes the lead over most of the actions that are taken. When MC gets kidnapped, he tells every member what they should and shouldn’t do. So since he does both, and thus is rather neutral, I feel like he could be a Beta. But oftentimes, I feel like his stubborn, rebellious nature overtakes his loyal nature. Many people are intimidated by him, especially those who know him well. So I usually picture him as an Alpha. Like I said, it depends on what I feel like. :p

Jumin - Alpha

Jumin, ohhh boy, Jumin is the Alpha of Alpha’s. Seriously, does this need any explaining? And in his route, he’s super possessive towards MC and dead set to win her heart and make her his. So dead set in fact, that it kinda goes the creepy way. He needs an Omega’s patient and nurturing nature to feel good and truly relax. He always thinks he’s correct, bosses Jaehee around like it’s nobody’s business, constantly and sometimes unconciously riles Zen up, ALWAYS HAS FIGHTS AND DISCUSSIONS WITH THAT POOR ZEN SAVE HIM, and is rich and the heir of C&R. He’s the Alpha King. The Superior Alpha. don’t mess with him (even tho he won’t do anything because he’s really just a strange guy with a good heart).

V - ??? Omega?

Does anyone even know anything about V? I’ve never thought about this. He’s a gentle cactus child with a strong presence. He’s RFA’s babysitter leader so maybe he’s an Alpha? But he’s not really good with doing leader stuff so maybe not? In fact, I lovelovelove the thought of V being an omega. For angst reasons, V being controlled by Rika’s overpowering pheromones (I headcanon her as an alpha but more on that later) just sounds like it could make for some interesting things. He’s also really nothing more than a gentle giant and a lovely mom friend I love him and he needs to be protected at all costs okay

Rika - Alpha

Again, does this even need an explanation? Rika founded a cult and literally owns the whole thing. She’s like a queen bee or something. Her presence is overpowering and at first, it was in a good way. The RFA was flourishing and the parties were a big success. But then things went the wrong way, and her overwhelming charisma manipulated people into joining Mint Eye. They’ll eat the floor she walked on. She’s always had (and still does) V in her grasp and the poor man can’t find it in himself to fight back. 

Saeran - Omega

We know that between him and Saeyoung, Saeran was the sickly, weaker child and Saeyoung was the stronger child. This resulted into Saeran being really dependent of his brother. Later, he completely dedicates himself to Mint Eye and Rika’s plans to destroy the RFA. He’s powerful and an immediate threat to the RFA but he can’t function without Rika’s influence. Without her, he would probably enter a sort of crisis and lose himself. Rika is his savior and his master. He’ll do anything for her and he’s allowed her to completely brainwash him. As a kid, he was completely broken by his parents, which only made him weaker for powerful Alpha’s. Rika was the one lucky enough to completely have her way with him.

[justsomebucky]

Pumpkin Spice

Summary: AU. Reader loves pumpkin spice lattes, fall, and Bucky Barnes.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word Count: 1,910

Warnings: language, misunderstandings, a teeny bit of angst, some crankiness, excessive caffeine consumption, excessive fluff, friend-to-lover, almost a coffee shop au?

A/N: Here’s something fluffy to lighten the mood a bit. This is for @promarvelfangirl‘s 2k Fall Follower Celebration. Congrats!!! My prompt was pumpkin spice.

Fall was the best season, undoubtedly your favorite. You loved the atmosphere, the weather, and the knowledge that the holidays were just around the corner. You especially loved when you got to relax outside of your favorite coffee shop with your favorite drink in the autumn sunshine.

All the trees in the area had already changed to bright, beautiful reds and yellows, and of course some leaves had already fallen. They swirled in the light breeze, moving past your feet as you waited for your best friend to arrive.

James “Bucky” Barnes could be called a lot of things, but punctual was not one of them. The coffee you ordered for him wasn’t cold yet, but if he didn’t show soon it would be.

You leaned back in your chair, reaching for your pumpkin spice latte to take another sip. Bucky liked to tease you for your (somewhat unhealthy) addiction to the autumn brew, but you didn’t want to hear it. After a long morning of dealing with people at work without losing your mind, you deserved a little comfort, and you didn’t care what he thought.

“Hey, Y/N.” Bucky sat down across from you, immediately reaching for his coffee and taking a big gulp.

“You’re late,” you replied, shaking your head.

He set the cup down and gave you a charming grin. “Aw, doll, you know I’d never stand you up.”

“Totally not what I was implying.”

Bucky nodded toward your cup. “Let me guess, another pumpkin spice latte?”

Your eyes narrowed, and you tapped your fingers against your cup. “Let me guess, no new material this week to use against me?”

“Sorry, sorry. Don’t get angry about it.” He leaned back, raising his face to the sun while closing his eyes. “I just don’t get it. I could never drink the stuff.”

“Have you tried it?” you asked, genuinely curious. “Because you shouldn’t knock it until you’ve tried it, Bucky.”

“That’s what she said,” he joked, squinting at you with another grin.

“I give up on you.” You checked your phone, realizing that you only had fifteen minutes left on your lunch hour until you had to go back to work. “I have to head back soon.”

That made him sit up, and this time he was giving you a disappointed look. “Can’t you call off?”

“Yes, I can absolutely burn a half-day of paid time off just so you can remember you have someplace to be in another twenty minutes and ditch me.” It took all your strength not to add ‘for someone else’ to the end of that sentence.

So yeah, Bucky Barnes was on the list of things you loved, too, and it made you absolutely crazy that he didn’t seem to return your affection with anything more than friendship.

Not that friendship was a bad thing, because you cared about him and didn’t want to lose him from your life, but sometimes you found yourself imagining a future with him…one that included spending fall together, followed by cuddling up for winter, followed by…

But nope, it just wasn’t meant to be, and that made you cranky, obviously. Ugh, you wished you hadn’t reacted that way. Mondays were the worst.

It’s not his fault he didn’t feel the same way.

“Ouch. I’m sorry, Y/N,” he said quietly, leaning forward to put his hands flat on the table, giving you his full attention. “I deserved that one.”

“No,” you sighed, standing up with your latte. His expression made you feel even more guilty. It was better to leave now than make things worse. “You don’t deserve it, Buck. I’m sorry, too, but I really do have to head back now. I’ll see you later, okay?”

“See you later,” he said, giving you a strange look.

You didn’t stick around to try to decipher that one.

Your sudden change in behavior must have set off warning alarms in Bucky’s brain, because he texted you for the rest of the day. Between pictures of puppies and funny memes, you received a total of twenty-eight texts from him over the course of a few hours.

The problem was, you were at work, and you couldn’t really stop to read them with no less than three different (utterly incompetent) colleagues bugging you for help. You ended up staying busy until it was time to go home.

By the time you remembered all the texts, you were just arriving home, takeout in hand. You went inside your apartment and set your food down on the counter, slipping your shoes off with a sigh of relief.

You quickly typed out a message, apologizing for not replying earlier and mentioning that you’d been super swamped at work.

Bucky’s only reply was, No problem. Lunch again tomorrow?

The idea of spending another precious lunch hour waiting on him did not sound appealing at all.

Can’t tomorrow…maybe the weekend?

This time, Bucky didn’t reply right away.

With a shrug, you ate your dinner, showered, then finally collapsed onto your comfortable bed to sleep.

Bucky took it one step farther and showed up to your workplace on Thursday right before your lunch hour started. He arrived with takeout from your favorite sandwich shop, a pumpkin spice latte, and another one of his charming smiles.

Naturally, all the ladies in your office wouldn’t let the two of you eat in peace. After you’d led him to the lunchroom, you were swarmed by everyone introducing themselves, using tactics like ‘Where did you get that delicious-looking food?’ and ‘I’ve never seen someone so handsome in this lunchroom before!’

The worst comment, however, came from the big mouth of your least-liked colleague, a middle-aged woman named Sandy who wouldn’t know the right thing to say if someone handed her a slip of paper that literally said ‘this is the right thing to say.’

She waited until you’d successfully diverted the attention of all the other unwelcome table guests before making her approach. You knew from the look in her eyes that she was going to either say something totally stupid, or something that humiliated you.

This time, she managed both.

“I didn’t know your brother was in town, Y/N,” Sandy exclaimed, feigning delight as she turned to Bucky. “You’re so handsome, you must have been blessed with the good genes.”

To his credit, Bucky had the decency to make a face at her. “She’s not my sister, ma’am. She’s my best friend.”

“Oh,” Sandy replied, nodding seriously. “That makes more sense.”

“And for the record,” he continued, now full-on glaring at the loathsome woman, “Y/N is smart, talented, and beautiful, so I have no idea what you mean by ‘the good genes.’ What genes could top that?”

For the first time since you’d met her, Sandy was speechless.

You took a sip from your latte to hide your smile, and once the vile jerk was gone, you and Bucky both burst out laughing.

“Thank you,” you said sincerely, giving him a smile. “I appreciate you putting her in her place, even though you had to lie for me.”

Bucky shook his head and reached for his coffee. “I wasn’t lying, Y/N. I meant every word. And besides, I was worried you were mad at me this week, that you wouldn’t want to hang out with me again. I don’t want anyone taking away from our lunch hour together.”

“You’re my best friend, Buck. You know that. Even if you make fun of me for my beverage of choice.”

“Best friend,” he echoed, nodding his head slowly. “That’s what I am.”

The two of you continued to eat in contemplative silence until the hour was up.

You didn’t see Bucky again until Sunday morning, when the two of you were meeting for brunch. He had mentioned wanting to try a new café, one that was closer to his place than yours, but you didn’t mind the longer walk.

The day was a little cooler, with big grey clouds rolling overhead. You’d left the apartment wearing a long-sleeve shirt, but when the wind picked up and fallen leaves started dancing all around you, the shirt wasn’t enough to keep you warm.

Unfortunately for you, the café wasn’t open yet by the time you got there, so you were forced to sit on a bench nearby to shiver while you waited.

Bucky got there not long after you, with two cups his hands. You looked up just in time to see him hold a pumpkin spice latte out for you to take, which you did gratefully.

“I’m sorry,” he apologized, sitting down beside you as you cupped your drink for warmth. “I didn’t check the hours before I suggested this place. It should be open in another ten minutes or so.”

Just the sight of him made you feel better. His blue-grey eyes looked brilliant against the grey sky backdrop. He was dressed in a nice sweater, his hair combed back neatly. Bucky looked amazing, the picture-perfect guy in a picture-perfect season.

You’d sit out in the cold for him any day.

Not that you could tell him that, especially after he reiterated that the two of you were just friends in front of you to all your co-workers.

“It’s all right. I haven’t been waiting that long. Thank you for the warmth,” you said, lifting your cup a little. You took a long sip of the delicious drink, reveling in the feeling of heat on your cold fingers. “It tastes even better in this weather.”

“I’m going to try it,” he announced, giving you a firm nod. “I think it’s about time I try it.”

You raised an eyebrow at him. “Really? I thought you didn’t like it?”

“The drink? Not sure about that just yet,” Bucky said, glancing between your cup and you. He leaned over a little, but instead of his hand reaching out for your drink, he placed it on your cheek tenderly. “You, on the other hand?”

You froze, eyes wide as his thumb lightly caressed your skin. What the hell was happening?

“I’m sure about you,” he murmured, leaning even further until you could feel his warm breath on your face.

He gently brushed his lips against yours to test the waters.

You were so stunned that your mouth opened a little in shock, and Bucky took the chance to deepen the kiss, his tongue tasting yours for the first time.

Now that you finally understood what he meant when he said he wanted to try a pumpkin spice latte, you grinned against his lips, moving closer but careful not to spill either drink. No one wanted hot coffee to ruin this moment.

You wrapped your free hand around his neck to pull him even closer.

Just friends?

Yeah, right.

Not when he was kissing you like this, his lips molding to yours like they were meant to be there, like they were made to kiss you over and over until you were utterly breathless.

When he pulled back, Bucky looked relieved. He gave you a smile warm enough to make you forget all about the chilly autumn air. “So, Y/N…this pumpkin spice latte?”

“Yeah?”

“It tastes even better than I imagined.”

You tried really hard not to smile but failed miserably. “Better make sure, though, Bucky, because you’re going to have to put up with it until snickerdoodle latte season.”

“I’m more than okay with that,” he replied, reaching for you again, brunch all but forgotten.

[sweetandlethal]

BTS Fic Rec

This took me so long istg.

Under the cut because this is really long

Taekook

Hiraeth by haruguk

Words: 100,533                   Status: Complete                NSFW/ANGST

Summary: Jeongguk has learned the hard way from the tender age of thirteen when his father pushed him down the stairs, that people are a disappointment. They always will be and so he breaks hearts instead.

Hurt people hurt people.

Jeongguk likes hurting girls, but he doesn't like hurting Kim Taehyung.

Notes: This one is really good, is super angsty. Be aware of 1. Drug Addiction, 2. Implied/Referenced Abuse, 3. Self-harm, 4. Mental Instability. Basically read it if you’re ready for a ton of angst.

Sexy Bitch by miyukitsune

Words: 4,812                        Status: Complete                NSFW

Summary: Jeongguk somewhat really likes Taehyung's mouth, and ass, and fangs.

Notes: This one is al smut BUT it’s really funny. Jungkook is a werewolf, Taehyung is kind of a vampire. Jungkook has ADHD. Jungkook wants. That. Ass.

your goodbye is my beginning by jhopeg

Words: 22,706                     Status: Complete                NSFW

Summary: one is bad at being good, the other is too good for his own good

(alt. bad boy!kook gets a taste of the sweet life)

Notes: Honestly… just go read it. Sexy times with plot and lots of feelings.

Vmin

cut it out / pull me in by minblush

Words: 7,815                        Status: Complete                NSFW

Summary: Jimin has a hair pulling kink, and goes to get his hair cut one day because it’s getting too long, and Jungkook has started to laugh at the way it keeps falling into his face. Taehyung is the hairdresser that ends up cutting it, and he keeps pulling his hair by accident. Queue Jimin trying to hold back the moans, and getting really turned on.

you're so fine you could make an impression on monet by sunttae

Words: 2,392                        Status: Complete                FLUFF

Summary: park jimin; bitter tour guide, dance student, human sunshine

and apparently, bad joke enthusiast?

Notes: Super cute. Super funny. Embarrassing sweethearts.

tell me we'll never get used to this by cumulus

Words: 3,047                        Status: Complete                NSFW/FLUFF

Summary: Taehyung wakes up to Jimin looking like something out of a fairytale. Okay, fine—maybe it's just the canopy this bed came with, but he didn't book the Fairytale Suite for nothing. They're at Disneyland, they're married, and he's going to make the most of it.

Love By Kim Seokjin by internetpistol

Words: 3,399                        Status: Complete                FLUFF &CRACK

Summary: Once upon a time, although Seokjin doesn’t know if this is where the story begins or where it ends, two fools fall madly in love.

“Hyung.” Jungkook says, monotonously. “That sounds so soft, it’s disgusting.”

“Shut the fuck up, JK. This is my story time, not yours. Maybe when you start boning Yoongi, I’ll tell a story about you two. I’ve heard you jerk off to him in the bathroom too many times to count.”

“Jesus, hyung.”

“Yeah, exactly like that.”

to the moon and back by kaythebest

Words: 80,055                     Status: Complete                SUPERNATURAL ELEMENTS

Summary: "The other kids think that Jimin is strange. And he is, to be fair. Sometimes Jimin talks to people that aren’t there. Sometimes he starts crying, randomly, and then a moment later the wailing siren of an ambulance or police car can be heard outside. Sometimes he just shuts down and won’t talk to anyone."

Jimin and Taehyung are basically professionals. When they're called in to deal with a werewolf terrorizing a small town, they know the deal.

Things are rarely as they seem.

chasing the sun (and the moon) by sunshineline

Words: 28,267                     Status: Complete                HURT/COMFORT

Summary: Jimin gets kicked out. Taehyung goes with him.

Notes: Running away. Jimin is authistic. Trans Character. Homophobia, Transphobia. Read it, it’s really sweet.

love in the Mesozoic era by sunshineline

Words: 1,301                        Status: Complete                (I’d say) FLUFF

Summary: “Do you think we’ll get married?” Taehyung asks, staring at his laptop screen. His glasses slide down his nose and he brushes them back with his wrist.

Jimin considers this, a little giddy, imagining a wedding and imagining not having a wedding and instead just getting the certificate and imagining Aepyornis towering over both of them officiating. “Yes, I think we will.”

Taegi

i take off my hands and give them to you by madcap

Words: 2,685                        Status: Complete                FLUFF

Summary: Yoongi is an expert sleeper.

Notes: Yoongi is trying hard. Yoongi has impressive sleeping skills.

So Kiss Me by mucha

Words: 3,070                        Status: Complete                FLUFF

Summary: Taehyung cranes his neck to see the words written on the piece of paper. Paper passing game. Oh fuck.

Yoongi chose the game, so he's the first player. Taehyung is sitting next to him. Taehyung is actually the only person sitting next to him. Ergo, Yoongi is going to pass the paper to him. The super thin piece of paper. Mouth to mouth.

Fuck.

Notes: Everyone is emotionally constipated

any way i can by squeen

Words: 4,444                        Status: Complete                FALLING IN LOVE

Summary: The thing about love, Taehyung thinks, is that there’s really no way to know its happening until it already has.

Dream Mixed with Sleep Paralysis (The Last) by hobicarus

Words: 10,072                     Status: Complete                FLUFF/LIGHT ANGST

Summary: In which Taehyung has to become a doctor but he’s scared of death and Yoongi wants to become a rapper but he’s scared of himself.

“Fuck the money for the rent, Taehyung. Fucking fuck the rent. I will pay it for you. I will make double shifts, fuck, I’ll clean the floor with my tongue if that’s necessary.” it’s what he says, but it’s the way he says it that makes something click.

The gaze of Taehyung shifts from Yoongi’s pyjamas to his face and he looks at him right in the eye.

“You will clean the floor with your tongue, hyung?”

hard to say "i don't" when i do by vsyubs

Words: 3,149                        Status: Complete                FLUFF

Summary: Taehyung gets down on one knee.

“Min Yoongi,” he begins.

Yoongi sucks in a breath. “Oh God.”

“Min Yoongi, you have made me the happiest man on earth, because, well, you lost. I spent one whole dollar on this ring. Will you go on the worst date ever with me?”

A bet goes wrong. At least, by Yoongi's standards.

put a sweet little flavor in my mouth by euphoria

Words: 1,313                        Status: Complete                FIRST MEETING

Summary: “You have to kiss me,” Gucci Stranger says and okay. Okay what.

Heartbeats by mucha

Words: 4,426                        Status: Complete                PINNING

Summary: Yoongi is a painter, Taehyung sleeps in his bed.

Notes: Go fucking read it now, it’s literally so so good.

let you fall in love with me (and we’ll be whatever we wanna be) by tiramisu

Words: 5,602                        Status: Complete                NSFW

Summary: Yoongi craves the control, and Taehyung craves Yoongi’s attention.

Notes: Porn With Plot and Feelings. Go read it.

i'd trade all my tomorrows (for just one yesterday) by triangularism

Words: 1,410                        Status: Complete                ANGST

Summary: When Yoongi breathes in, he swears he can feel a part of Taehyung’s soul settling in his lungs, and it burns but there’s something beautiful about the pain of being owned by someone who’s so painfully unaware.

or,

Taehyung meets Yoongi for the first time every day, and by the next morning, he’s forgotten and Yoongi has to make him remember again, and some mornings are Good Days and others are Not So Good Days and the rest are Better.

Notes: The Notebook but even fucking sadder. I shed five tears.

you ruin every song by roachprince

Words: 17,761                     Status: Complete                ANGST WITH A HAPPY ENDING

Summary: When Yoongi is seventeen, he falls in love with Taehyung.

When Yoongi is nineteen, he fucks it up.

When Yoongi is twenty-five, he finally gets to make things right.

Notes: aka how I became a Taegi sucker.