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iwillbringyouruin · 4 months ago

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Visions Magazine with Tobias Forge on the idea behind Rite Here Rite Now, the importance of soundtracks in general and how he distinguishes between himself and his characters (Visions Magazine issue nr. 377, 08/2024)

Full translation of the included interview by me below the cut - buckle up, this is a long post! There are no spoilers for RHRN in this.

Markus Hockenbrink: Tobias, have you ever watched the movie Metallica: Though The Never?

Tobias Forge: Yes, once, when it had just come out. The topic Metallica came up when we were taking care of the funding for [RHRN]. Every larger production company – and I have to emphasise here that this was before Taylor Swift’s The Eras Tour and her extremely successful movie about it – voiced a lot of concern back then whether anybody would still be interested in concert movies. I had to explain time and again that my movie wouldn’t be a typical concert movie, to which I was asked several times: “Oh, so something like Through The Never?” I had to deny that again. We tell a story in our movie most of our fans are already familiar with. So it’s not an entirely new concept, which is already the first distinction from Through The Never. If you only consider that there is a concert part and a feature film part, then those two movies are probably similar. But that also applies to La La Land.

M. Hockenbrink: You describe your movie as a combination of Kiss’ Alive II, Ralph Bakshi cartoons and silent film horror. Is that a kind of childhood dream that comes true there?

T. Forge: Definitely. For as long as I’ve been interested in music, I’ve also been interested in film and television. Working in film could have also been a career option for me, but I always got the rather annoying impression that one would have to go to film school to really find a place in that field. School was never my strong suit, I see myself more as a autodidact in that regard. That I had the opportunity to work on/contribute to my own movie as a sorcerer’s apprentice of sorts is a real privilege. That is a dream come true but it is also something I can picture more of in the future. Next time maybe without the band.

M. Hockenbrink: Can you remember a specific moment in your life when you realised that you were especially drawn to topics that are slightly morbid and unsettling?

T. Forge: I think that due to my family I came in contact with vastly different kinds of pop culture from a very young age. In more traditional families with more conservative parents and siblings of similar ages, you only really start with your respective journey to find yourself in your teens. Then there are often restrictions that are meant to distract from those darker influences. My parents on the other hand are very liberal and my brother was 13 years older than me. There were never limits or censorship for me. My childhood didn’t go by without rules entirely, but I was always allowed to watch or listen to what my brother was also watching or listening to. That was I was exposed to all kinds of teenage culture from the beginning. Sure, I also liked Pippi Longstocking and He-Man. But that was always combined with the French arthouse films my mother liked to watch or the horror flicks my brother was into. I can’t recall a particularly striking horror film experience, but I still remember the first time it dawned on me that movies don’t just exist, they’re made.

M. Hockenbrink: How do you mean?

T. Forge: My father worked as a documentary maker in television. His job was to connect the video track and the sound track in a fitting way for different film production. I saw Jaws on television with him as a small child. It’s important to note that my father is not somebody who can just quietly enjoy films but somebody who likes to butt in. Thanks to him I already had a kind of epiphany during the introduction. He said: “Look closely! There is nothing to see in this underwater scenery except the algae. Technically completely harmless. But it only takes the ominous music to turn the whole scene into pure horror already!” And I thought: Wow! That’s true! Later in the movie you only have to hear that music and it immediately puts you on edge, even when there’s nobody in the water right now. They don’t even have to show the shark anymore. I found it fascinating that the [viewer’s] senses/perception could be manipulated like that. Ever since I’ve been viewing films with different eyes. I can still allow myself to dive into the story but at the same time I see the practical aspect to film-making.

M. Hockenbrink: I had a similar feeling during the introduction of Shining: technically a cozy road trip in the mountains, but a pure nightmare with the music.

T. Forge: I’m with you on that. Shining is one of the best movies of all time. And funnily enough, only the intro sequence was actually shot in nature. All the other scenes, even if they were outside, were filmed in the studio. Exactly that kind of craftsmanship is what I find inspiring.

M. Hockenbrink: With that in mind, what makes a good soundtrack in your opinion?

T. Forge: We already talked about Jaws, but I can think of Eyes Wide Shut as another example. There is that short piano theme that comes up again and again, incredibly effective. A good soundtrack needs to deliver something that you don’t have to be able to see to perceive its existence. Sure, there are no monsters in Eyes Wide Shut, aside from the main character’s jealousy as an internal monster maybe. But just like the music in Jaws, the theme from Eyes Wide Shut symbolises something that doesn’t have to be shown. The sound is enough. That is also a commonly used effect in adventure and love movies. You just put in a short vignette to describe the love between two characters. In Star Wars, Luke Skywalker also has his own theme, that is used every time when things get emotional and you’re supposed to feel that hope. You’ve got to pay attention to that. Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th also has a personal theme to recognise him by. Every time you hear it you immediately know “Oh shit, he’s nearby!”

M. Hockenbrink: What about soundtracks that are made up of songs?

T. Forge: With that, I’m especially thinking of Silence of the Lambs. In the scene where Buffalo Bill dresses up as a woman and dances around his basement, a song called Goodbye Horses by Q Lazzarus is playing. I have no idea how the artist felt that since the song is now so irrevocably connected to that awful scene, that you can’t listen to it anymore without thinking of it.

M. Hockenbrink: Do you feel like soundtrack work is more appreciated now than it used to be?

T. Forge: I think that it’s definitely gained importance over the last 40 years. The right song on the right soundtrack can be incredibly powerful. Just think of Stranger Things. Obviously, Metallica and Kate Bush already had successful careers before, but what happened with Master of Puppets and Running Up That Hill following the series was something else entirely. The songs were associated so strongly with the narrative, that way more people listened to them than before. Of course I’m a strong advocate for live music but I also realised that nothing is as strong as the connection of visuals and music. That is still the most powerful way to appeal to a deeper emotion through the association.

M. Hockenbrink: More or less a shortcut to the subconscious.

T. Forge: Exactly. But you can’t be cynical about that either. If I was an A&R person at a big label, I would probably also say: “You just have to find a spot for one of your songs on a popular soundtrack, then you’ll have made it!” That’s really how it is. But when you view it from an artistic perspective, when you want to reach people a certain way or bring across a certain message or a certain feeling, the combination of visuals and sound can’t be topped.

M. Hockenbrink: It especially lends itself to an immersive experience, as seems to be in the foreground of [RHRN]. An album by Black Sabbath or Iron Maiden ends at some point, then you’re gone from that metal world again. With Ghost, however, you get the feeling that the illusion just keeps on going, across several media. Did you plan the Ghost mythology like this from the start?

T. Forge: In part. When I started with the band, I only wanted to make a standalone album. The concept was supposed to be interesting and practical, but I wasn’t planning for Ghost to be a huge thing. The style I pictured has its own limits in my opinion. The band was supposed to function a certain way and appeal to a certain target audience. The concert was supposed to be a theatrical performance in the literal sense. Ghost were never supposed to perform in a normal rock club nor go on tour. I wanted more of a kind of Vaudeville show in a proper plushy theatre. The band was supposed to be as anonymous as the actors that stand on stage and play, say, Faust. The idea behind this was: Those who don’t know who the people are on stage are more ready to follow the story. Then we would perform three days back-to-back in select cities. Berlin, Amsterdam, London. Just like Diamanda Galás who can more likely be found at a culture festival than in a rock shack. But things turned out differently in the end, and I had to kiss my original ideas goodbye again, so to speak.

M. Hockenbrink: Why?

T. Forge: After the success of our debut album, it became clear to me that more conventional concerts were going to be demanded of us and that I could only really say yes or no. This problem became worse after our shift to a bigger label. It became clear that my vision of telling stories clashed with the live sector and requirements for success more and more. At a certain point anonymity doesn’t work anymore and I had to make peace with that in the end. I originally didn’t even want to do interviews but that’s obviously tricky when you want to sell records. The question that I constantly ask myself since is how I can do those things best in the Ghost way without denying the original Vaudeville spirit.

M. Hockenbrink: In his autobiography Golf Monster, Alice Cooper talks about himself in third person a lot when he is talking about his character. Are you feeling similarly at this point?

T. Forge: At least I can definitely see where he’s coming from. There is a difference between the person Vincent Furnier and the character Alice Cooper. I believe that he was on the verge of completely transforming into Alice Cooper at one point – to the point where one has to decide where they want to live or die. In the end he decided to remain Vincent Furnier and only become Alice Cooper for work, on stage. So far I’ve been fortunate to combine the two pretty well, but had I started Ghost ten years earlier in my life, it would have probably affected me similarly to how Alice Cooper did with Vincent Furnier in his time. But with my humble experience as an actor I have to say: every character you play becomes a part of you to a certain extent. You have to find certain qualities – good or bad – within yourself to bring such a character to life. I think that most actors only play one or two roles throughout their life that they then end up being known for. The different characters that I’ve portrayed on stage are not only very similar but actually also a part of me. Fortunately a part of me that I don’t want to deal with all day long.

M. Hockenbrink: Too cynical and antisocial?

T. Forge: Cardinal Copia or Cardi, as I like to call him, is not an all-around cool person, but that makes him so fun to play for me. He is half Freddie Mercury and half Jacques Clouseau. Kind of clumsy, kind of silly, kind of stupid. The kind of guy who trips over his own feet but catches himself elegantly. That’s also me in a way, but not just. And I think that’s easier to embody than a daredevil hero character who can rival anyone and gets all the ladies. When somebody plays only those characters their whole life, it will probably really go to their head. Especially when there are drugs involved on top of that.

M. Hockenbrink: With all that fondness of doom that can be found with Ghost, that universe also has something humorous about it, benign even. It that an intentionally included contradiction?

T. Forge: Yes, and it is also very important to me that it comes across like that. For me that also has something to do with the evolution of metal. Originally it was mostly a phenomenon connected to the youth, nowadays the musicians and their fans are close to retiring. That brings a certain maturity. Even the Norwegian black metal musicians who were super pissed and extreme 30 years ago and were only made of hate and aggression are well-adjusted people now. Bearded fathers and grandfathers with a pleasant view on life that make others laugh. I see a certain duality there. Everything that has something to do with goth, with metal, with horror, appears dark, dismal and hostile at first. But in reality, that can all be extremely life-affirming and a source of great joy for many people. So pretty much the opposite.

M. Hockenbrink: Speaking of horror: could you imagine making a real feature film some day?

T. Forge: Yes, I would love that. I’m well aware that it’s not going to be easy to make what I’m picturing a reality, just because I’ve done directing once with [RHRN] now. The creative liberty I got to enjoy there also was due to the fact that I funded the movie myself. So nobody was meddling with it. That is likely completely different when you work on behalf of a big studio, because we are talking about different sums here. If I only go off my dreams, I would name two points of reference. One is Shining, the other Bram Stoker’s Dracula by Francis Ford Coppola. I would like to make a movie that’s only shot in a studio, with elaborate sets, matte painting and all that. No outside shots, no special effects, no green screen. And no actors who only gets to see what they were actually doing after the fact. Proper old-school. The way movies are actually meant to look.

#the band ghost #rite here rite now #rhrn #tobias forge #papa emeritus iv

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justagalwhowrites · 6 months ago

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Yearling - Ch. 36: Severed

Joel, Tommy and Ellie search for you. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-35 found on Tumblr here.

I'm sorry I couldn't resist.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon-typical violence and a step beyond. Torture. Mention of past sexual assault (not described). No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only

Length: 8.2k

A/N: I want to state, real quick, that Bambi is NOT going to be sexually assaulted again. This is a highly triggering subject and, given the situation she's in, I understand if folks are bracing for it. That's not going to happen. The threat of it is there but it's not going to happen.

We are into the final arc of Yearling and we are going to see some TLOU 2 OVERLAP again. There isn't any this chapter but there will be in this arc and here's how: a character from that game will be mentioned as will the spoiler-y incident from a few chapters ago. What happens plot wise in this arc is completely separate from the game and entirely original content BUT there is that character overlap and more specific mentions of the incident and the motives behind it. This character returns NEXT CHAPTER. If you're trying to go in blind to season 2, it might be wise to step back. Feel free to send me a DM, I'm happy to answer any and all questions!

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Joel had rarely paid much mind to how long it took to get out of Jackson before.

“Tommy,” Maria was stalking after her husband as he, Joel and Ellie headed for the stable. “Be reasonable, you can’t just take off…”

“Sorry, babe, but I can’t just sit here and let ‘em have a piece of her,” Tommy said as they went to the stable. There were the two horses Tommy and Joel had just returned on, the three that had carried the kids back, and some horses you’d been working with. You’d been telling Joel about their progress, how one was nearing well broke and you wanted him to go with you to the shooting range with her soon to get her accustomed to the sound of gunfire.

“Do you have some kind of death wish you haven’t bothered to tell me about?” Maria planted herself in front of her husband, her arms crossed, defiant. “You have responsibilities here, Tommy! People who depend on you, people like me and our fucking son! You don’t get to just take off at your brother’s command anymore!”

Joel stiffened at that. He and Maria had gotten to a good place in their relationship over the years, her moving past the thought that he’d been the driving force behind all her husband’s misdeeds. They’d settled into a mutual respect and eventual affection since he’d come to Jackson, Maria seeming to appreciate what he did for the community and the way he loved her son and Joel admiring her leadership and the way she was a partner to his little brother. He thought they were past this.

Maybe he was wrong.

Tommy took his wife’s shoulders in his hands, his thumbs rubbing little circles against her.

“If it were you, he’d be going with me,” he said gently. “That’s my baby sister out there, Maria. Can’t live with myself if something happens to her and I didn’t do everything I can to stop it. I’m goin’. You can either help and hope we get back soon or you can be pissed while I’m gone but I’m goin’, you can’t stop me.”

He pressed a kiss to her forehead and went and stood beside Joel, looking over the horses.

“What’s better,” he asked. “Tired mounts or ones that might spook?”

Joel looked at his brother for a moment, thankful that he had him to rely on, and ground his teeth. He didn’t know the answer.

“They’re on foot,” Ellie said, joining them. “Tired is probably better, we’re still going to catch them. But I don’t expect this to be quiet and if we’re on horses that spook, well…”

Joel gave her a stiff nod and went to get the horses ready to leave. He was moving as quickly as he could but it felt slow, everything felt so slow. It felt like he should be running, pushing himself to the brink so he could reach you sooner. Every second you were away from him hurt. It was worse than when you’d left Jackson to search for Savvy in the blizzard. That had been bad enough but at least then he could believe that you were in one piece, that you could take care of yourself.

That wasn’t the case now. He knew you weren’t safe. He knew you weren’t OK. He knew he’d vowed to protect you, the night the two of you made promises to each other in his bed he had sworn to keep you safe and never let anything happen to you.

He’d failed at that.

He’d failed and now he was here, doing what he had to do to make sure he could reach you. It just didn’t feel like enough. Nothing would, not until he held you again.

Tommy and Maria talked in low, harsh voices until they had things situated. Food, water, ammunition, medical kit.

“Tommy,” Joel said, jerking his head toward the horses, voice sharper than he’d meant it to be. His brother jogged over to him, taking the reins of his horse from him.

“The guys who brought the kids back are going to wait here until a few more crews come in,” Tommy said. “Then they’re coming out after us. We can mark a path. With fresher horses, they’ll catch us quick.”

Joel nodded stiffly and the three of them led their horses to the gate, Maria following with her arms crossed over her stomach. In another situation, Joel would have taken the time to talk with her and reassure her. He didn’t have the luxury of time now.

He mounted up as the gates opened, Ellie and Tommy following suit, the three of them riding through the gate the moment there was room.

“Joel!” Maria called after a moment. He looked back at her. “Bring my husband home.”

He watched her for a moment, at the fear on her face and in her wide eyes, a mirror of what he was feeling now. But she was still letting him go. He wasn’t sure he could do the same in her position.

“I will.”

Ellie took the lead, pointing out the spot in the fence where kids left town. Joel ground his teeth and resisted the urge to yell yet again. What good would it do? What was done was done and this lesson was one he doubted Ellie would forget. She didn’t need to be taught it again.

They rode for nearly two hours when they came upon a small clearing and Ellie jumped off her horse before it had even come to a stop.

“We were here,” she said, looking around, almost panicky. “We were here, I know we were, they had us behind that tree…”

She ran over to it, walking around it until Joel couldn’t see her anymore.

“Ellie!” He called. He couldn’t have her out of sight, not right now.

“I was right,” she called back, coming around the tree. “I took a chunk of bark off of it, this is where we were but they’re gone, completely fucking gone, I don’t…”

Joel was less surprised than Ellie.

“They weren’t about to sit and wait for us to find ‘em,” he said. “We need to track ‘em. We’ll find them.”

He, Tommy and Ellie circled the clearing on foot, looking for signs of a trail. It didn’t take them long to find one. Unfortunately, they found more than one.

“The fuckers split up,” Tommy kicked a plant in frustration. “Any way to tell which group had her?”

“Smaller boot prints, maybe,” Joel said, looking closely at the ground.

“But there were other women,” Ellie said. Joel’s head snapped toward her. “They had a few women. I didn’t talk to them but… She wouldn’t be the only one.”

“We can’t split up,” Tommy said. “It’s too goddamn risky, there are too fuckin’ many of ‘em, we have to stick together…”

Joel nodded, trying to think. He tried to keep his shit together but he could feel it happening, the panic setting into his bones. He could hear the blood in his ears, his heart pounding a frantic rhythm against his ribs. He was having a hard time taking a full breath, his head spun. He reached out, his hand finding a tree trunk, giving him something to root him to the ground.

“Joel?” Ellie’s hand appeared at his back. “Hey, you can’t die on us right now, we have to get her back, you can’t do this now, you gotta keep it together, you hear me?”

He nodded quickly, closing his eyes for a moment. His mind scrambled for something - anything - to hold him here, something to make him push past the fear and do what he had to do.

He thought of you.

He thought of the first time he’d felt your body against him, on the back of a horse in the snow-covered forest. The first time he’d held you because you wanted him to, how you’d sought comfort in him. The first time he’d kissed you, how your lips had fit softly against his, the quick little breaths you’d made, the way you’d felt so close to him. The first time he’d touched you as his wife, how your body was so familiar to him but was brand new, too, with this new context. You were his, he was yours and he needed to keep himself together long enough to get you home.

He took a deep, shaky breath.

“We follow one trail,” he said. “We either find her or we find the people at the end of it. If she ain’t with ‘em, we get ‘em to tell us where she is.”

“You really think they’re just going to, what, tell you whatever you want to know?” Ellie gaped at him. “They’re not going to just answer your fucking questions, Joel!”

“Wasn’t plannin’ on askin’ nice,” Joel said, stalking back toward the horses. “We follow the middle track. See where it leads.”

Joel knew he should feel some kind of shame about what he was about to do. What he wanted to do, how he wanted to hurt them. He’d never told Ellie the finer points of what he and Tommy used to do - still did, when the need arose. He’d never told her what he did to find her when David had her and he was desperate. She knew he used to kill people, he thought she had some idea of just what that entailed but he’d protected her from the worst of it, the most shameful parts.

Now, he was hungry for it. If he were a dog, he’d be salivating for it, aching to get his jaws around the throat of the man who had taken you from him. He didn’t want to just kill him, that wasn’t enough. It hadn’t been enough the year before when he’d sent him away from Jackson and it wasn’t enough now when he was doing who knows what to you. He was going to enjoy pulling him apart, piece by fucking piece. He almost hoped that Cody wasn’t with the men they were tracking, that he’d find you and have the chance to take every ounce of pain from them before finding Cody and taking it from him, too. He couldn’t even regret the drive to do it or the fact that he knew he could do it and do it well. His only concern, after finding you, was exposing Ellie to that.

But they lived in a harsh world. Maybe it was good for her to know the harsher parts of it.

Joel led the way, slower going now that they were beyond where Ellie knew the group to be. They were carefully tracking a group of what looked like seven people - including two women - for hours. It was dusk when Tommy noticed the signs of people first, giving a low whistle that sounded something like a bird. Joel looked over his shoulder and Tommy nodded toward a patch of sky he could see through the trees. Joel looked up. There was smoke.

He dismounted and tied his horse off, Ellie and Tommy doing the same, before the three of them prowled, quiet and slow, toward the smoke. It wasn’t long before they could smell it, hear the quiet laughs of men. Joel tightened his jaw and his grip on his gun. His heart raced.

The group they came upon largely had their guard down. Joel spotted someone through the trees, beyond the fire, looking like they were patrolling. Otherwise, they weren’t paying any attention. Joel gestured to Tommy and Ellie, sending them behind larger trees, Joel going to one himself. He peered around the thick trunk to find them there, make sure these weren’t just innocents passing through and seeing if he could catch a glimpse of you.

But they weren’t innocents, a woman with her hands bound sitting beside one of the men at the fire, another one - also tied - with her back against a tree. There was no sign of you or Cody.

Tommy met Joel’s gaze, his face set and determined. Joel gave him a stiff nod before turning to Ellie, her own expression hardened with barely controlled rage. She didn’t even look at Joel, too busy watching the men around the tree.

Joel took a deep breath and raised his gun, stepping around the tree and firing, catching the man with his back to them in his head. He fell forward with a thud.

There was a moment of stunned silence, the only sound birds fleeing the crack of the gun. Then, it was chaos, the men scrambling for weapons. One of the women screamed.

“Need two alive!” Joel yelled to his brother and daughter, pressing closer and firing again, felling another man.

Tommy shot next, a third man going down. A bullet whizzed past Joel’s head, close enough that he felt the heat of it on his skin, the shot clipping his ear. He ignored the sharp pain of it, watching as the shot Ellie got off dropped a fourth man. The fact that they’d caught the men when they’d stopped for the night was to their advantage. They were clearly used to traveling in a larger group and running unchallenged, only watching for infected who often made themselves known with crackling breaths, the sound of crunching through the brush and sharp clicks. They weren’t expecting a small group to come in, guns blazing. They were slow getting their weapons, rifles on the ground and out of reach, making picking them off like shooting fish in a barrel. Joel shot the man on watch as he came running toward the fire, his gun raised and aimed at Joel.

Tommy charged forward and grabbed a man who was just getting to his feet, his back toward the three of them. He was just raising his gun when Tommy swung the butt of his rifle at his head, catching the man in the temple and knocking him off balance. He took advantage of the moment and ripped the weapon out of the man’s hands, casting it aside before shoving him to the ground and putting his boot in his chest. Tommy leveled his rifle at his head, holding the man in place.

“Got one!” He yelled to Joel.

There were two men left standing now, one reaching for a gun. Ellie shot him in the shoulder before Joel got a chance to react, sending him sprawling on the ground. The other was smarter. He grabbed the nearest woman and pulled her in front of him as she screamed, pressing a gun to her head, his eyes darting between Joel and Ellie.

“Keep coming and I kill ‘er,” he panted.

“Joel,” Ellie’s eyes darted toward him. “What do we do?”

“Let me go,” the man said, the woman in his grip trembling. “Him too, and I leave her alive.”

Joel didn’t have time for this. He moved quickly, raising his gun and firing, hitting the man in the middle of his forehead. The woman screamed again, covered in his blood and stumbling forward as his body went limp on of her.

“Shit,” Ellie lowered her gun, looking at Joel. “I thought we needed two.”

“Think we got two,” he stalked over to the man Ellie had hit in the shoulder. He was whimpering on the ground, clutching the hole that was gushing blood.

“Please,” he said, eyes wide. Joel ignored him, grabbing a fistful of his shirt and dragging him to the man Tommy still had at gun point. He dropped the man there with a pained groan and he looked to the women, the one who had been a hostage sitting up next to the body of the man who’d had her.

“C’mere,” Joel said. They looked at each other quickly but stayed still. Joel, again, resisted the urge to yell. He didn’t have time for this. “Ellie, cut ‘em loose, tell ‘em how to get to Jackson if they want. Give ‘em whatever they need. See what they know.”

Joel turned his attention back to the man on the ground, going down on one knee beside him. He grabbed his hair in his fist, forcing his eyes to meet his own.

“You’re gonna tell me what I wanna know,” Joel said. “And you’re gonna do it quick. Understand?”

“Why would we tell you a goddamn thing?” The man below Tommy asked, watching Joel. His words were quick, panicky. Joel looked back at him for a moment before he ripped the injured man’s hand away from his wound with one hand and thrust his thumb inside the bullet hole, pressing up into the tendon below his skin. The man thrashed and screamed, the shrill sound sharp and cutting. Joel left his thumb jammed inside him until the other man spoke again, his eyes wide. “Fuck, OK! OK! What do you want to know, we’ll tell you! We’ll tell you, please!”

Joel pulled his thumb free of the man’s body and wiped the blood on a clean spot on his shirt, turning his full attention back to the man below him.

“Should get one thing straight now,” Joel said. His voice was flat. “I don’t mind hurtin’ you. In fact, I like it. Like gettin’ justice for everything you’ve done wrong in this life. I can promise you’ve done a lot wrong and I can promise I can make you pay for every goddamn ounce of it in blood. I know how to make it last. But I’m in a hurry and I want this over quick. It’s in your best interest to give me what I want. Got it?”

The man gave a shaky nod.

“Your boss has got my wife,” Joel said. “You split up. I need to know where he’s takin’ her.”

“He gave us a meet up point,” he said, voice shaking. “We were afraid of someone coming after her, he had us split up, he’s got her not us, I swear…”

Joel ground his teeth.

“Where.”

“I don’t know where he’s taking her,” he said quickly. “I know where we’re supposed to meet him tomorrow, that’s all! I swear, I don’t know where he’s going.”

Joel thrust his thumb inside the gunshot wound again, plunging it deeper, pulling harder at the structure of him as he screamed and writhed.

“No, stop!” The man below Tommy begged. “We don’t know, we don’t know! We just know he was taking her to trade, that’s all we know!”

Joel froze before pulling his thumb from his body. He grabbed the man’s hair again, forcing him to look at him.

“Trade?” His heart was pounding. “Trade for what.”

“Territory,” the man panted. “Please, there’s a guy who wants ‘er, promised us territory if we got her for him, that’s all I know. He was going to try and meet with him, see if they can cut a deal. If he couldn’t find him or couldn’t get what he wanted, he’s meeting us in the morning.”

Joel looked to Tommy, his face hard. Tommy just gave him a nod. It seemed like the truth. Joel turned back to the man.

“You’re gonna tell me where the rendezvous point is,” he said. “And you’re gonna keep it real quiet and then we’re gonna ask your friend the same question and he’d better say the same place as you. Got it?”

Joel leaned in close, the rattle of the man’s pained breaths hot and wet on his ear.

“North, ten miles,” he said. “Where the rivers meet.”

Joel sat back from him and looked to the other man.

“Now you,” he said. “Better say the same damn thing as your fuckin’ friend.”

The man’s eyes darted toward Tommy, who pressed the gun closer.

“Don’t look at me,” Tommy said. “I ain’t savin’ ya. You wanted to live? Shouldn’t have taken my brother’s girl. Answer the question.”

“North of here,” he said, looking back to Joel. “Said they’d be there in the morning, we were just stopping to rest for a bit, that’s all…”

“Where north of here.”

The man’s eyes darted to his friend before looking back at Joel.

“Ten miles or so,” he said. “There’s a spot where two rivers meet…”

Joel nodded slowly and looked to Tommy before getting his knife out.

“No,” the man below him shook his head. “No, I told you what you wanted to know, I didn’t lie, it was the truth I swear it was the truth!”

“Oh, I know it was,” Joel said, adjusting his grip on the knife. “But you took my daughters, took my wife. Not about to just let you live.”

He thrust the knife into the man’s stomach and he gasped, his eyes and mouth gaping wide in a silent scream. Joel angled the blade up, forcing it towards his lungs before twisting it and pulling it free with a harsh tear. He wiped the weapon on the man’s pants before getting to his feet, watching as he tried to hold himself together, not able to take a full breath. He’d drown in his own blood before too long and Joel wanted to watch him do it. This man had taken everything from him. He was owed his suffering.

“Joel,” Tommy said, nodding down at the remaining man at the end of his gun, one who was clearly about to make a run for it. He knew he was done for, he was desperate. “What are we doin’?”

“Shoot ‘im,” Joel said. “Not worth the risk.”

Tommy obeyed, the man dead even had a chance to flinch. Joel went back to watching the the first man gasp and gargle, fighting to breathe and failing. He should feel something, he knew that. He should feel guilt or some kind of pity. He didn’t. He barely even felt satisfaction. You were gone. He was hollow of everything beyond pain and fear and rage.

“Joel,” Ellie’s voice was quiet behind him. He turned to face her, her eyes wide as she looked between him and the dying man. He’d almost forgotten she was there.

“Get the women out?” Joel asked, shifting instinctively to block her view of the man suffering at his feet. She peered around him, anyway.

“Yeah,” she said. “They didn’t know anything. Gave them directions back to Jackson and some guns from these assholes. I don’t know that they’ll end up there but…”

She looked at the man again for a long moment before looking up at Joel.

“Did you get an answer?” She asked. “Do we know where Mom is?”

His chest got tight, hearing Ellie call you that, knowing that he shared children with you and you were gone.

“We know where Cody’s headed,” Joel said. “Let’s get what we can from here and head out.”

The three of them took ammunition and weapons and food from the dead before mounting up, Joel taking the lead again.

It only took a few hours to reach the place the men indicated. The group had stopped here before, Joel could tell. There were signs of fire pits, places where fallen logs had been dragged over for places to sit, cleared brush.

“What do we do now?” Ellie asked.

“We wait,” Joel said, not happy about his answer. How was he supposed to just sit here when you were out there, with them? But he didn’t have another choice.

They got the horses settled and found places to watch and wait where they should see people coming and have the advantage. Joel settled in, Ellie sitting beside him while Tommy kept watch.

“Where’d you learn how to do that?” She asked eventually, quietly into the dark.

“Do what,” he asked, even though he knew.

“Hurt someone like that,” she said. “Make them give you information.”

Joel was quiet for a moment, twisting his wedding band over and over on his finger.

“You know some of what me ’n Tommy did after the outbreak,” he said. “Did some of that, too.”

She nodded slowly.

“You never talk about it.”

Joel shrugged. The sound of crickets seemed loud, louder than they should be.

“Not exactly somethin’ I’m proud of, baby girl.”

“But it’s useful,” she said pointedly.

He sighed.

“I’ve used it a few times since, when it’s important,” he said. “When it’s to protect you or her. It’s not somethin’ that’s good to know how to do.”

“I want to know how to protect people, too,” she said, her voice dark. “I have shit to protect, too, Dad. I want to know how.”

Joel sighed, looking over at her, the outline of her barely visible in the light of the moon as it filtered down through the trees.

He wanted to tell her that she didn’t need to know this stuff. That he would always be there to look after her, to do these ugly things that needed doing. But he knew that wasn’t true.

He’d doomed her to this life, in a way. One where she wanted to know how to pull answers out of someone with pain, how to turn the love you carried for the most important people in the world into a deadly weapon. There was no other way to be in this reality, one with infected and raiders and the last gasp of human kind struggling to continue on. If he’d left the doctor alive, at least, maybe things would be different. Maybe he’d have succeeded without Ellie, maybe the world would have been better for her eventually.

But he would have come after her and there was no point in fixing the world if it had to continue on without her in it. Good, bad, indifferent, there was no point to any of it if the price was her life. Hers or yours or Savvy’s, the three of you were all that mattered. And he liked knowing he had skills he could fall back on if he needed them.

“We’ll take care of what needs doin’ now,” Joel said. “Then we can talk.”

The three of them took turns keeping watch. Joel wasn’t able to sleep. Instead, he thought of you. How he’d had to coax you into life in Jackson, how you’d come to find your place there, how you’d chosen to do all that with him at your side.

There was a lot in this life he knew he didn’t deserve. He’d never deserved Sarah, that was for damn sure. The world hadn’t deserved her, either. He’d squandered the gift that was her existence, let her down when she’d needed him the most and he’d bourn that weight the rest of his life. He didn’t deserve Ellie, either. He certainly didn’t deserve you, something so strong but soft, vibrant but centering. You were meant for something more than him but you’d chosen him, anyway. He remembered when your fingers first brushed his, when he first heard you play guitar, when he first saw how you loved his daughter like she was your own. He wasn’t sure how he was meant to keep going if he didn’t get you back. What would be the point? Ellie was grown now. Savvy had survived all on her own for years and Ellie had taken her under her wing. They didn’t need him. But he needed you.

Dawn was just beginning on the horizon when Joel heard it, the sound of people coming in from the north. He roused Ellie and Tommy and the three of them stood, lying in wait amongst the trees, rifles at the ready.

Joel wanted to come out guns blazing but then he saw Cody, riding on horseback with just two other men.

They weren’t outnumbered. You weren’t with them.

Joel readied to step out from the trees, rifle raised.

“Joel,” Tommy hissed.

“Go around the side,” he said, voice low. “Kill the others. But he’s mine.”

He moved from behind shelter then, weapon leveled at Cody’s chest.

“Cody!” Joel called, watching as the men’s heads all whipped around to focus on him, scrambling for rifles. “You have what’s mine.”

Cody lifted a hand to his henchmen and they lowered their weapons as he smirked at Joel.

“Think she was mine before she was yours,” he sneered. “Seems to me I just took back what got away.”

“Where is she,” Joel said, prowling closer, straining to keep his voice calm.

“Back where she belongs,” he said, fishing in his pocket for something. He found it, pulling it out, unwrapping it from a kerchief and throwing it onto the leaves at Joel’s feet. “But you can have the part of her you laid claim to.”

Joel looked down and his vision narrowed to a sharp, bloody point. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears, the soreness of his legs and back and the pain at his ear that had been nagging at him suddenly gone. His hands shook as he dropped the rifle and lowered himself, slowly, to the ground. Lying there were two fingers. Your fingers. The wedding band that had been there since Joel had slipped it onto you was bloody, ragged flesh dangling from the ring he’d made you.

Something inside of Joel snapped then. It was a sharp, clean break, one that he could he could feel deep at the core of him. A severing of his humanity, a setting aside of the things that made him who he was. The love he held for his family, the care he had for the place he called home, the remaining parts of him that were gentle and good - those things were closed to him now. Joel Miller had been called monster many times in his life but he knew he’d never become one. Not truly. He knew it because this had always been there, lurking below the surface, brought forward when he needed it most but always controlled, always contained. It wasn’t contained now. It couldn’t be.

Joel left the gun on the ground, gently picking up your fingers - sticky and cool - and putting them delicately in his pocket before getting to his feet.

“Thought about sending you back with her whole hand but,” Cody shrugged. “Mitchum has use for it. Nothing she can’t do down a few fingers, though.”

Joel didn’t even see Ellie and Tommy getting into position when he roared and lunged for Cody, ready to kill him with his bare hands.

***

The Day Before

“Move.”

You glared at Cody, your wrists chained in front of you.

“Not telling you again,” he said. “They’re still close enough, we could run ‘em down if you want to try me.”

Your stomach got tight.

“Fine,” you said. “Let’s go.”

He split his men into three groups, hauling the man you’d killed to the brush and leaving his body behind. There were three women you hadn’t seen yet, one going with one of the groups, two with another. You didn’t get a chance to say anything to either of them, just sharing a look of desperation before you were led away.

“You’re going to regret this,” you said as he shoved you forward.

“Why, because you’re fucking guard dog is going to run me down?” He sneered. “Think we’ll handle him just fine. Besides, by the time he finds us, you’ll be long gone.”

You followed his command, trudging through the forest and trying to find some way to leave a trail to follow. Joel would come for you. It would likely be hours yet before he was back from patrol, hopefully long after Ellie and Savvy made it back to town. You knew he’d come looking for you the moment he discovered you were gone, that he’d do anything to get to you. You just needed to make sure he could find you and that you were in one piece when he did.

“Why are you doing this?” You asked once you’d been walking for hours, looking at Cody. “You said you knew it was wrong, you helped me. Now you’re doin’ this? Takin’ me and other women?”

“Let’s just say I learned my lesson with you, Doll,” he said. “Could try to be a ‘good’ man all I wanted, try to do the ‘right’ thing but it wouldn’t get me anywhere. Not like there’s much left here to live for, right? I should just take what I want while I can, no one is going to give it to me, even if I deserve it.”

“Deserve it?” You stopped and turned to face him. “You think you deserved something from me? You held me prisoner, you fucking raped me, you…”

His backhand caught you off guard, sending you sprawling to the ground, unable to catch yourself with your bound hands. He stood astride over you, grabbing your face sharply and forcing you to look at him.

“Don’t fucking call it that,” he hissed. “That’s not what it was.”

You spat in his face.

“Fuck you.”

He squared his jaw, like he was considering doing something more to you before he straightened, wiping your spit from his cheek.

“Get her up,” he said. “We’ll stop here for a bit, take a break. Make her take a piss, get her cleaned up a little. Maybe we’ll have some fun before we hand her over.”

You hoped the fear didn’t show on your face, that the way your stomach dropped and heart stuttered wasn’t obvious.

It’s not like you didn’t know, consciously, what this was all leading to, what you were going back to. You’d been there for long enough before, you knew what it was and what this meant.

But you weren’t sure you could survive it again. It had nearly killed you before. If you hadn’t escaped when you had, you weren’t sure how much longer you would have really lasted living that way and now you were going back to it. It would be worth it to protect your children but the fear of it was still there, the claws of it sharp and harsh inside you.

Cody smirked.

“Maybe I’ll show you just how nice I was before,” he said. “Show you what you took for-granted.”

Two men pulled you roughly to your feet and shoved you into the trees, off the trail you’d been walking. Your chest got tight and your stomach turned and you found yourself flexing your fingers, clenching and unclenching your hands into fists as you tried to focus. Your vision threatened to narrow but you forced yourself to see beyond your own body, think beyond the fact that your lungs couldn’t seem to fill and your head was getting light.

The men pushed you for a few minutes away from the rest, toward a stream. One stayed further back, watching the forest for signs of infected or someone who might come to take you.

“Alright,” the other said, nodding to you. “You heard ‘im. Piss, get cleaned up.”

“You think I’m gonna just do that with you watching?” You sneered, brows raised.

He stalked forward, drawing his gun and pressing it to your chin.

“You really think I won’t blow your goddamn head off?” He asked, his breath reeking of rot and liquor.

“No,” you smirked back. “Your boss has you by the balls. You can’t do shit to me.”

He stepped back and you saw the strike coming that time, dodging it enough that he caught your cheekbone more than your chin and you stayed standing.

“I can do that,” he snapped. “And I’ll do it again.”

“Go ahead,” you said. “Because you’re a little bitch. I’ve had good sex that hurt worse than that.”

He bared his teeth and he went for you again.

But he was stupid and big and slow and you knew where he was going to be now. You dodged him, not fully thinking and with no real plan. He stumbled where you’d been standing and you stepped behind him, looping your arms around his neck and pulling back so the chain constricted on his throat.

He choked and gasped, dropping his gun on instinct as he clawed at your arms, trying rip himself free and trying to make a sound but you were pulling too hard, the other man too far to hear or see what was happening.

The weight of him thrashing against you sent you off balance and you fell, taking him down with you, his body heavy on top of yours. But you didn’t give in, keeping the chain tight over his throat as he kicked and flailed. You held it there until he went limp and you released him, shoving his body off yourself and panting for breath as you did. You didn’t have time to get the feeling back in your body or to ease the panic, though. It was sheer fucking luck the other man who was standing just out of sight hadn’t heard something and you had to take care of this now.

You found the gun where the man you’d killed - thought you’d killed, at least, you weren’t about to risk shooting him - had dropped it and took a guess at what direction to run in.

You didn’t make it far.

“Hey!” You heard the crush of leaves, someone moving for you. “Fuck, she’s running!”

You turned and shot, the first bullet going wide as your hands shook but you were able to keep it together enough to get off another shot, this one hitting him square in the chest and he dropped like a stone.

You kept running.

You weren’t sure how long you ran for when you heard them, the men closing in on you. You couldn’t afford to look back and take the time to shoot, you had to keep moving, even as the sound pressed closer and your head was swimming. And then a hand closed on the collar of your shirt - Joel’s shirt - and ripped you back and down. You twisted on the ground, trying to aim the gun but it was kicked away from you.

“You’re gonna regret that you little bitch,” the man panted over you. “We could’ve made this easy on you. We ain’t now.”

He hauled you to your feet by your bound hands and forced you back to where the group had stopped, finding the two other men who had been sent after you on the way. Cody was standing where you’d stopped before, a small fire built on a patch of dirt in the middle of the trail.

“You really think that was the smartest thing you could have done?” He asked, his voice almost eerily calm.

“Did you really think I was just gonna let you hand me over?” You replied. “That I’d just go quietly into being a prisoner?”

“I guess that’s why Mitchum’s so obsessed with you, isn’t it?” He asked, prowling closer. You wanted to shrink away but you couldn’t, not with the man at your back. “Because you just keep that fight in you. You didn’t give up like the others and he’s a man who likes a little fight.”

He nodded toward the stump of a tree and the man at your back shoved you to it, forcing you to your knees beside it.

“Thing is,” Cody said, pulling his knife free of its sheath at his belt. “You don’t need to be… intact for the shit he likes best about you.”

Your eyes darted. You were surrounded, there was nowhere you could go and nothing you could reach.

“Don’t be too worried about it,” he continued, kneeling on the other side of the stump. “Think he’d be pretty pissed if we took your whole hand, for example. But I don’t think he’ll miss a few fingers.”

Your heart raced, the blood pounding in your ears.

“That a risk you want to take?” You fought to keep your voice calm as you clutched your hands tightly to your body. “You really want to go through all this trouble for nothing?”

He shrugged.

“Think we’ll be fine.”

The man at your back took your wrist in his grasp and shoved your arms down to the jagged wood of the stump, your hands clenched in tight fists. Cody took your left one and pulled at your fingers, trying to pry it open as you grimaced and fought him on it. After a moment, he gave up.

“Fine,” he said. “Don’t want to cooperate?”

He took the knife and slammed it through your forearm, on the side of it so it missed bone, making you scream as the blade went through the muscle and skin and into the wood on the other side. Your hand went limp on instinct and Cody spread your fingers with one hand, holding the other out. Another man handed him a knife and he lined it up with the base of your ring and pinky finger, smirking a little as he did.

“Would you look at that,” he traced your wedding band and you tried to look at your hand through the blur of pain and tears. “The feral woman got hitched. You marry that animal of yours, that it?”

You considered begging. If you thought it had even a chance at working, you’d have done it. But it didn’t.

“Fuck you,” you said instead.

“Think this’ll make for a nice keepsake of you, if he ever comes looking,” he said, pressing the knife in just enough that you could feel it, even through the pain of the blade still lodged in your arm. “Wedding ring won’t mean much where you’re going, anyway.”

He started cutting then, the automatic response your body had to pull away ripping and tearing against the knife holding you to the wood. You couldn’t look away from it, even though what little there was in your stomach was threatening to come up and the pain had deafened all the sound around you. You weren’t sure if you were screaming or not but you couldn’t breathe and couldn’t think as you watched part of your body be cut away.

Cody finished, wiping the knife on your shirt - Joel’s shirt - before passing it back to one of his men. He held your bloody, jagged fingers up, turning them slowly in front of his face. You could hear again, the ragged sound of your breath and the rustle of leaves on the trees, the breeze moving through as though you weren’t being dismantled on the forest floor.

“Think your guard dog will even still want you now?” He asked, holding them in front of you. Your blood dropped from them onto the sleeve of the shirt. “Not sure he’ll be interested in such… damaged goods.”

You stared at the fingers in his grip in disbelief. It didn’t seem real, the things you’d used to play guitar and grip the reins of your horse and hold your husband’s hand were separate from you now. You remembered, for a moment, marrying Joel. The clarity of it was almost visceral, how he’d taken the ring that was now slick with your blood and slipped it onto the finger that was dangling before your eyes. It was a part of you then. It wasn’t now.

Cody held his empty hand out and the man he’d given the knife to returned it.

“No,” you shook your head, your voice wet and raspy. “Please, I…”

“Not taking anything else,” he said, his tone almost kind. “Just going to make sure you don’t bleed out on us.”

With that, he pressed the blade to the place he’d cut part of you away and you screamed, the metal scalding hot. You realized they must have put it in the fire, using the heat to cauterize the wound. Without warning, one of the men pulled the knife that was still in your arm free and the heated blade moved there, too. You could smell your skin burning, the man at your back holding you still as your body fought to escape the pain of it. They moved you around like a rag doll, cauterizing the other side of your arm, too, before stepping back from you.

“There,” Cody stood, handing the knife off and taking a kerchief from his pocket, wrapping your bloody fingers in it before stashing them away. “Now you should know I’m not fucking around. Get up. We’ve wasted enough time on this shit and Mitchum won’t wait on us forever.”

The man behind you pulled you to your feet by your shoulders and you swayed on your feet for a moment, your head swimming before you doubled over, vomiting mostly bile before your legs gave out, the man catching you before you hit the ground.

“Shit,” Cody’s voice sounded far away. “We’ll have to find a way to move her…”

You passed out.

When you woke up, it was dark, a hand around your jaw.

“There she is,” Cody said, releasing you and patting your cheek twice. “Need you up and walking, can’t trade you half dead. Move.”

You tried to orient yourself, get some kind of understanding. You weren’t where you’d been when you’d passed out. You were on some kind of makeshift litter, your left arm and hand throbbing dully. Your hand was bandaged. Cody grabbed a fistful of your shirt, pulling you upright and you all but collapsed against him, stumbling as you tried to find your footing. The second you did, you pulled away from him. You couldn’t bear to touch him, even if that meant you ended up on the ground again.

“Just gotta make it about 100 yards,” he nodded toward a flickering glow in the distance. “Then you’re not my problem anymore.”

He nudged you in that direction and you moved, almost mindlessly. You weren’t strong enough to fight it. You were barely strong enough to walk. You cradled your injured arm to your body as best you could, watching as the glow of the fire drew closer.

“Stop right there,” an unfamiliar voice said, a man coming through the trees with his rifle raised. But he lowered it as he drew closer, looking the group you were with up and down. “Cody. Starting to wonder if you weren’t going to make it.”

“Got held up,” he said. “But I got what he’s after, if he still wants to meet.”

The guard just jerked his head toward the fire and led the way, you trailing along behind him with Cody and his men at your back.

The fire was in the middle of a large clearing, one with a cluster of about 20 men around it, the man you feared more than any other sitting at the back of it.

A wide smile came over his face when he saw you, the spread of it sinister and slow.

“Well well,” Mitchum said, getting to his feet and walking closer. He was still so much bigger than you, tall and broad and you knew just how well he could force you to do what he wanted. “The prodigal son returns, with my favorite toy no less.”

“Told you I could get her,” Cody said, pushing you toward him. “And I believe we had an agreement.”

“Sure, sure,” Mitchum waved him off before looking you up and down, just feet away from you now. Your head spun. “Jackson is yours when we take it down, as is anyone who survives. S’long as you remember who gave it to you.”

Mitchum reached out, grabbing your injured hand roughly and you cried out with it as he pulled your arm toward him.

“The fuck is this?” He held it up. “Thought I told you I wanted her intact, there’s no deal if you fucking maimed her.”

Cody shrugged.

“She killed two of my men,” he said.

Mitchum dropped your hand and clenched his jaw before snatching his gun from its holster and shooting Cody’s man who was at your side, making you flinch away from the sound.

“You think I give a fuck how many of your men make it?” He asked. “You think their lives matter? Got fuckin’ news for you, theirs don’t and neither does yours so you better do a damn good job of explaining why you brought her to me damaged.”

“She tried to take off,” Cody said, eyes darting down to the man who was dead on the ground. “Had to do something to keep her under control. Figured you’d want her at all, even if that meant damaged.”

Mitchum holstered the gun with a huff and pulled you away from Cody, your skin crawling where he touched you.

“Well, she’s back where she belongs now,” he passed you off to one of his men before turning back to Cody. “Jackson’s yours, when we take it.”

“And I want horses,” Cody said. “For my trouble.”

Mitchum seemed to think for a moment before giving him a stiff nod.

“Fine, three horses,” he said, waving them forward. “Take ‘em and go. Don’t want to see you again for a while or else I might change my mind.”

“Pleasure doing business with you,” Cody smirked before looking to you. “Told you you should have given me what I deserved.”

You didn’t say anything. Instead you just stood there, in the hold of one of Mitchum’s henchmen, watching as the man who’d stolen your freedom rode off into the night.

Next Chapter

Taglist: @ashleymsnodgrass@planet-marz1@kalea-bane @juneswonderlust @ilovepedro @h-annahayy @starstruckmusiciansartghost @beccerjune @mumma-moonchild @netonetoneto @mellymbee @purplelye @n7cje @flugazi @evyiione @randomhoex @aliengirl99 @orcasoul @reds-ramblings @pedropascalsbbg @fupoola @tinypotatothing @knopes-waffles @lilmizmoz @ayamenimthiriel @jenispunk @panda-pascal @sarap-77 @flugazi @your-slutty-gf @daniegraceg @partyofone3413 @cumberpegg @noisynightmarepoetry. @fifia-writes @grumpygrumperton @srmacaroni @txlady37 @bigboiseason123 @ashleyfilm @arizonadreamingg

A/N: I know it's a rough chapter but... feral!Joel?

We've only seen the beginning of him, he's about to go on a rampage like no other I can promise you that.

Also, I'm sorry for making this chapter quite so brutal. I really didn't want them to get off easy in this situation, I wanted to make sure we know that there are going to be some long term repercussions from all this - in this case, Bambi's missing fingers. They live in a brutal world and they're facing brutal things and I wanted this to be reflective of that.

Thanks for sticking with the story. I really do love you all!

#fanfic #joel miller x female reader #yearling #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller x oc

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eamour · 1 year ago

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hey queen I wanted to share my huge life success story !! and I hope I can motivate others 222

before manifestation

I used to be really insecure abt everything, my mum wasn’t in my life anymore because she lost custody of me n my brothers when we were young, I always hated how I looked, how tall I was, how damaged my hair was, how skinny I was and when my grandma forced me to shave my head life became worse (my hair grew back now tho lol) my dad worked 2 jobs to keep us stable but he did do everything in his power to make us happy like putting me n my older brother in a good private school so we can get good studies even so I had really bad grades & my friend group would always skip classes which encouraged me 2 do the same (ofc it isn’t their fault) I knew abt subliminals n manifestation then but I didn’t really know how to act on it.

after manifestation

after I started believing n myself n one day I said “yk what todays the day where I change and ik I can have a better life and I have the power to do it.” so I started journaling, Pilates, listening 2 subs & manifesting. a month later my life has completely changed !! I grew out my hair 2 my lower back it’s super long and my curls are actually healthy, I grew out my lashes a lot, I used to be 5’9 and now I’m 5’7, my skin is clearer & a lot glowy, my friends always compliment on how good I smell even when I don’t put in perfume 🫠 I don’t sweat as much as I used 2, my teeth are straighter i physically cant grow hair on my body anymore (ik random) & I have my desired body. my dad is currently building a double story house AND I HAVE MY OWN BATHROOM 🤭🤭 it kinda gives tsitp house n it’s in a rich neighbourhood. my dad got a new job he only works 1 now and the job pays him a lot of money, I have so many makeup products, perfumes & clothes my amazing step mom is moving in with us when the house is built, i got a cat, a new car and this new guy who came this term asked me out on a date, i said maybe cus my dad would NEVER let me go on a date but I’ll try forcing it ofc

ty for reading and please please PLEASE never give up because if I did give up i wouldn’t be living the life I’m living right now ily mwah mwah

hey!! ♡

again a fucking incredible success story… your circumstances used to be so challenging, i respect you a lot for still making it through 💗

congratulations love, sending hugs your way rn! 🫶

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owlobservation · 30 days ago

Text

Itoshi Rin Profile from Egoist Bible Vol.2 (2024)

"I'll defeat Itoshi Sae and carve my name into the world. This is my story!"

Team: Bluelock Eleven

Position: Central Forward (CF)

Weapons: Kicking accuracy, technique, tactical vision, physical ability.

Birthdate: September 9th.

Age: 16 (First year high school)

Zodiac sign: Virgo.

Birthplace: Kanagawa Prefecture (Kamakura City)

Family structure: Father, mother, older brother, himself.

Height: 186 cm.

Foot size: 27.5 cm.

Blood type: A.

Dominant foot: Right.

Favorite soccer player: David Beckham. "I respect his kicks."

Age started playing soccer: For as long as I can remember. "I grew up watching my big brother play."

Motto: “The field is a battlefield”, “Tepid” (habit)

Strengths: I can play soccer. “Anything else doesn’t matter.”

Weaknesses: Unfriendly. “If you don’t like it then don’t bother me.”

Favorite food: Ochazuke. “Especially sea bream chazuke.”

Disliked food: Vinegared dish. “I don’t like sour things.”

Best rice accompaniment: Tuna. “Soy sauce and wasabi combo is the winner. No objection.”

Hobbies: Getting the chills from horror games and horror movies.

Favorite season: Autumn. “I like it when it’s a bit chilly.”

Favorite music: King Gnu in general. “Especially Prayer X.”

Favorite movie: Horror movie in general. “Especially The Shining.”

Favorite manga: Dragon Head and Ciguatera.

Character color: Turquoise Blue.

Favorite animal: Owl. “I’m fascinated by them. I think it’s the eyes.”

Best subjects: Physical Education, Art.

Weak subjects: Calligraphy. “I hate having to write exactly as I’m taught.”

What makes you happy: I don’t know.

What makes you sad: When someone is better at soccer than me. “So far it’s only my big brother.”

Last year’s valentine day chocolates: I don’t remember because I rejected and returned all of them.

Sleep time: 7,5 hours.

Where do you wash first in the bath?: The eyes with warm water

What do you like to buy at the convenient store?: Eye masks that warm the eyes.

Mushroom or Bamboo Shoots?: Mushroom.

What made you cry recently?: I don’t cry.

At what age did you stop receiving presents from Santa?: 8 years old. “When my big brother stopped getting them I followed him and stopped getting them too… Truthfully, I still wanted them.”

What did you ask for a Christmas present from Santa?: The same cleats as my big brother.

What would you do on your last day on earth?: Fight my big brother.

What would you do if you received 100 million yen:? Place a bet on a single number in Roulette*.

What do you do on your days off?: Immerse myself in horror games or horror movies.

What would you be doing if you hadn’t discovered soccer?: Can’t imagine. I’d probably be dead?

Who is your favorite historical figure?: Oda Nobunaga. The guy who unified the whole country gotta be crazy.

If you could only bring one thing to a deserted island, what would it be?: A soccer ball. To help me remember all the emotions.

Where would you go if you had a time machine, to the past or the future?: The future. I want to know how this revenge ends. If I win, that's fine, but if I lose, then I’ll do everything in my power to change that future.

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Rin's attachment to Sae lurks deep in his heart

Ever since he was young, Rin looked up to his older brother Sae and dreamed of becoming the world’s best together. However, when Sae returned from Spain, Rin was coldly pushed away** and he began to hate his older brother for ruining his life.

Rejecting his allies and unleashing "Darkness"

Rin chose to fight Sae by himself, completely refusing teamwork with Blue Lock. Exposing his true nature, he attacked his nemesis, Sae.

A day at Blue Lock, just before the match with U-20 Japan National Team

"When I woke up this morning, my left lower eyelashes had curled up, they got into my eye and it hurt. It happens sometimes, right? Lower eyelashes get all tangled up when you sleep. Eh? Just me? But big brother said it happens to him... Ah, don't remind me of that guy. This is the worst way to wake up."

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rin's Ranking on "Best 3 of Everything: Players seriously voted each!"

1. Ranked #1 The Least Likely To Succeed As Coach.

Isagi’s commentary: “I think the team would be in utter chaos.”

2. Ranked #1 The Strongest Supernatural Sense***

Rin’s commentary: "Huh? I don’t have a supernatural sense. I just like horrors. I was told that I was possessed by 200 vengeful spirits, though."

3. Ranked #1 The Worst Listener

Bachira’s commentary: "He’s the guy who only responds with 'I’ll kill you'. I like it though!"

4. Ranked #1 The Worst Luck

Nagi’s commentary: "Maybe Rin. Seems like he pulled the worst older brother gacha. But if his big brother is Itoshi Sae, I guess he’s lucky too.

5. Ranked #2 Least Loveliest Smile

6. Ranked #2 The Least Family-oriented Person

Isagi’s commentary: "If you look at those two, you would assume so. But if they really hate each other… It means that they also think about each other."

7. Ranked #2 Longest Eyelashes

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Notes:

*In Roulette, betting on a single number is called a "straight up bet". It's the riskiest bet, but if you win the 35:1 payout will be very rewarding. (Highest-risk, Highest-reward).

**They used this to describe what happened to Rin: 冷たく突き放された (Tsumetaku Tsukihanasareta), it means he was coldly pushed away or coldly abandoned (or forsaken). Please check my notes on Sae’s profile page, because there is a connection!

***The question was 「霊感が強いのは?」 -Who has the strongest 'Reikan'? 霊感 Reikan is an ability to sense the supernatural (like spirits, ghosts, demons, etc). People who have this are said to be very sensitive, they can feel or even 'see' the supernatural while others can't!

On his profile, Rin referred to Sae as "兄ちゃん niichan". So yes, all the "big brother" mentioned by Rin here are originally "niichan" in Japanese.

Check Rin's profile from the first volume of Egoist Bible here!

#itoshi rin #egoist bible #egoist bible vol.2 #translation

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yzzart · 2 years ago

Note

imagine daemon and rhaenyra’s pretty daughter, who has such a close bond with her brothers, jace and luke (like in your ‘now im here, with you’ fic). never far from them, hugging them, holding their hands. and in return, they’re incredibly overprotective of her.

and then there’s aemond, driven wild with jealously 🤭

— Flavor of a jealous dragon.

characters: Aemond Targaryen x (F)Targaryen!reader.

summary: witnessing one of your brother's trainings, you can witness the jealousy of a dragon.

warnings: incest, explicit language, explicit words.

word count: 2.978!

english's not my first language, so sorry for any mistakes!

"It's so strange to see him fighting the wind."

The youngest prince whispered, in a peaceful, mocking way, for you. Your lips couldn't resist trying to prevent a knowing smile, finding your younger brother's speech funny, from appearing quickly.

Really, it was strange to see a person with a sword Indeed, it was strange to see a person with a sword slashing only the wind and pretending that there was a person there, but you wanted to support your little brother.

"He's doing fine." — You uttered the words as you returned to stare at a little Jacerys training session. He was practicing alone, at that time. Some guards suggested training him, but your brother decided for himself that he preferred solo training. — And it was impossible to disagree that he was doing very well.

And Jace, insistently, decided to train in the sacred grove. It didn't matter to him if the place he chose might be a little too small to fight with his sword, he decided and is getting what he wanted. — With each sudden, swift step, the admirable leaves of pure red hue, which lay on the ground, moved in accordance with Prince Velaryon's feet.

You felt pride in being able to witness your brother demonstrate his skills and new ways of fighting. — In fact, it was much more interesting than being locked inside your chambers or going through several meetings about the future of the throne. — And seeing Jace increasingly become a worthy fighter was important to you.

"I think you should train too." — Taking your eyes and attention away from Jacerys, you begin to glare at Lucerys; that when he feels you staring at him, he lowers his head. — "Luke…" — The velaryon mumbled something it wasn't possible to understand.

"I don't think i should and i can't see myself fighting with dignity." — He muttered with his tone of voice of sadness mixed with indifference. That mix had a name and it was insecurity, and you knew what it was about like no one else.

The feeling of insecurity dominated Luke's mind, it was like a plague; words he once said to her. The feeling of insecurity dominated Luke's mind, it was like a plague; words he once said to you. — One thing that sometimes dominated him more than usual and sometimes fear joined in and brought a heavy and confused mix of feelings.

Having the rank of old sister, you know your brothers and sisters like the back of your hand. — Like a dragon with its rider. — And witnessing all the events with all of them, you get a sense of how much and how all the feelings came to them and with Luke it couldn't be the other way around.

And you knew Luke hated picking up a sword, even if it was in self-defense and that had happened once before. — And ended up with a person missing an eye. — And that person was Aemond, your uncle and your lover.

You tasted and found out what the word love meant with Aemond. It wasn't just a common feeling, that he was not worth your time or lost your focus on strengthening your family. It was more than that.

Living between complete love and hate is not an easy thing to live with and witness, it felt like a punishment from the good gods. A punishment that will always haunt you.

Lucerys did not harbor a sense of anger or indignation over your relationship with the man he'd blinded in one eye, on the contrary, he respected you. — He looked up to you, always will, and also always respects your decisions and feelings.

"You deserved to be happy." little Lucerys had spoken those words to you.

However, that did not mean that the relationship between Aemond and Lucerys could improve. — Only the good gods, who all begged for the blessing and good life, knew what would happen between those two worthy princes who shared the same house.

"I think otherwise." — A quick and pure response was directed at the prince. — "Dignity has always been with you and in you, Lucerys." — You directed your hand to the side of the youngest's head, intending to make a small and simple caress. — "Since the day you were born."

The last words almost came out as a whisper. Your voice had shown a certain weakness because of the feeling of emotion that was growing in you. Seeing your little brother like that broke your heart, and it seemed that there was no miracle cure or medicine that could heal that pain.

Your fingers passed through the youngest's brown locks, showing more than simple and meaningful affection. — Lucerys needed this. He needed support, and he didn't want to hoard those fears just for himself.

"My dear little brother." — You plead, beg the youngest Velaryon to look into your eyes. Deep down, you knew Luke was fighting himself not to meet your eyes, afraid of a reprimand or complaint.

In long seconds, Lucerys decides to turn his head in your direction and soon, his blue eyes, with the pigmentation of the ocean, e of the youngest meets your eyes the color of pure purple. — His eyes looked so empty yet searching for a lifeline at the same time.

"You are my point of pride." — You said. — "With sword or not, you are still worthy of everything about you and around you."

A small smile, shy but a little contagious, formed A small smile, shy but a little infectious, formed on Lucerys's short lips. — It was already a good start. — You didn't stop smiling at the boy.

The uncomfortable, sad and tired image of Lucerys from before was gone in a matter of seconds, and you never felt so good about your brother in your entire life. — The good gods were recognizing that.

"Kirimvose, issa mandia" (Thank you, my sister.) — The thick accent during the Valyrian lines was uttered from Lucerys's mouth. The fact that Lucerys was more confident with his High Valyrian than Jacerys was was funny to you. — But, you always kept it to yourself.

Lucerys didn't intervene or stop the small, light movements, the petting you were giving him, in his head. He was enjoying that attention and time with you. — You noticed it, of course, but you didn't think to remove your hand from there.

In a matter of seconds, you started to feel like you were being watched. — Well, you were watched everywhere, by the guards who looked after you and your life, and by the civilians. — But at that moment it was a strange thing. A strange feeling. — Maybe it was in your head, or it must be the stress you've been going through lately, so you decided to ignore it for a while.

"Is spending time with my older sister or does that only go for the younger brother?" — Jacerys's voice exclaimed in your ears, snapping you out of your worried thoughts.

How long had Jace stopped his training?

"Oh, shut up." — Luke grumbled, not caring about his brother's joke. Jacerys just laughed and didn't want to upset his brother any further, and quickly noticed his scowl and put it in his mind that he should ask what was going on with him later. — "Can we go? I feel like i'm going to get dizzy if i see you spinning alone with your sword one more time."

Lucerys couldn't hide the feeling of boredom and weariness that had been building in his body since the minute he arrived. The youngest, at that moment, preferred to spend time locked in his rooms.

"I was so bad..." — The words that were ready to come out of Jacerys' mouth end up being interrupted. It was a somewhat disturbing surprise for you, to the point that it drew your eyes towards the young man.

It looked like he had seen something that bothered him in a bitter way. The expression that fit Jacerys's face was one of disgust, mixed with anger and you were ready to question what had happened or what had passed through his eyes.

"Mandia." (Sister.) — The thick accent with a weak but understandable pronunciation slips, purposefully, from Jacerys's mouth. He didn't change his expression even when calling you and also, he didn't look away to the specific point that angered him. — And your thought, or perhaps a sign from the gods, left a small certainty about who would be there.

Without questioning, or letting a miserable word escape your mouth, you decided to turn around and find out at once who had angered your brother. — And maybe, who was watching you the whole time.

With his costume made of pure leather and severely sewn and well worked, with its pigmentation of pure black; the young man who was feared by all in the region and recognized by the kingdoms, was present there. — Probably, witnessing his nephew's training but that wasn't why he was there.

Aemond watched, from afar, what looked like a small meeting between brothers, even though you were totally different. And he didn't even make a miserable fuss or try to hide the look he held. — It wasn't easy to figure out the kind of look the one-eyed young man was delivering but you can be sure that when his one eye passed by you, he was left with pure admiration and enchantment.

You were staring back at him but fighting, in a strong and resistant way, a smile that even you couldn't explain. — And it would be so embarrassing to make the mistake of being happy with his presence in front of your brothers, you thought.

Aemond's posture was rigid, more serious than usual, it was as if something had bothered him too and it wasn't the nephew's attempt to subpoena with just the look. — That would never happen. — And he didn't want to appreciate what made him that way, and without delay, he decided to walk to leave the place.

And you knew how to recognize the fury of that dragon and you felt that you had to go to him.

"You'd better stay here." — You uttered an order, but not in a stern tone of voice or so strong as to startle them the wrong way. Jacerys wasn't going to question, or even say anything about, your decision and you understood that. — Lucerys was no different from his brother and remained silent, and only a brief sigh escaped his mouth.

Your eyes swept over the Velaryon brothers, a silent farewell to them for that moment. The anger and disgust had drained from Jacerys's face, returning to his neutral expression but with sensitivity because of you. — Moving your lips, you say "Avy jorrāelan." (I love you.) directly to each one.

"We'll be here for anything, remember that." — Jace warned you with determination

Leaving that part of the woods, your steps, with the joint of your long dress, end up taking some red leaves but not preventing or disturbing you to your greatest focus. — But you fear that the end of your dress might be a little filthy and you try not to think about that possibility too much.

In keeping with your quickening steps, the fewer servants and guards you observed and encountered during your little journey to find your lover. An urge to ask one of them where the one-eyed prince could have gone crossed your mind but you decided not to. — And when you least expected it, your vision has the privilege of finding the image of the oldest's back.

According to the wind speed, which was a little strong, Aemond's pure white hair moved.

There were no guards around that part, and you didn't find that strange; Aemond could have asked for time alone and that was understandable. — And it was a good time for the two of you to have some alone time too.

Your steps weren't as precise as before and you weren't as nervous, not in a bad way but completely different. But your heart was pounding and it was amazing how Aemond's presence, and just one look, could move you and your body. — A lump felt like it wanted to form in your throat but you knew you had to fight it.

"Aemond?" — You beat yourself up, mentally, for the small moment where her voice called out to you with a weak edge. A bad time for this to happen; but for your old lover, your voice came out perfectly sweet and woke him up instantly.

Your voice woke Aemond from all bad thoughts or those that led him to a dark feeling, a feeling where he wasn't recognizing himself in some stupid moments. You brought him back to his consciousness with just your voice. — No one from all the kingdoms conquered by your ancestors, not even the one-eyed prince's own family could know that he felt that way in love with you, his niece.

An uncle and niece in love. House Targaryen, the house of dragons, had seen this for so long and you had compassion to see your parents having the same story and look what happened. — Like parents, like daughter.

"I came to think you were going to be with those boys." — Without completely turning his head in your direction, leaving only a part of his face in your field of vision, Aemond utters those long words trying not to show what, in fact, he was feeling. You, in the same miserable second, understood what was corrupting the oldest

Aemond was jealous and under the circumstances, you were surprised and a little disturbed by what was going on around you. You knew that just questioning or pressing what he was feeling would not work and could make the small situation worse for the two of you. — And Aemond needed your attention and care.

"ñuha jorrāelagon." (My dear.) — Going towards him, you place your hands on the side of his face. You felt Aemond's body shudder with your touch and it couldn't be your hand, which was at a slightly warm temperature, but it was the feeling of being touched by you.

The prince's one good eye not only stared at her but admired you. The way an amethyst-colored eye took in every point and line of your face and claimed you were a painting made, delicately, by the good gods. — The Targaryens were closer to gods than men and Aemond was sure in that moment that he was being touched by an angel, that even he considered you a goddess.

"I hate the idea of having you away from me." — Aemond quickly looked away from her but for a short, brief moment. — "And having to watch those damn kids with you is the worst thing i could ever face in my own house."

When he mentioned his nephews, Aemond didn't think twice about venting all his anger and contempt. He had reasons to feel that way, to corrupt himself like that, and you hated to see him that way. — And it hurt just as much to see your brothers like that too.

And it was right there that Aemond gave up hiding the jealousy that was completely dominating his body.

"I'm here with you, aren't i?" — Your hand, which was being held beside Aemond's face, made a lingering caress to get his attention and regain his focus. Immediately, the elder's single eye meets your eyes again. — "I won't hold back your feelings, Aemond, but i hate to see you like this."

The sincerity in your words calmed him down a bit, letting his posture soften for a little while.

"And they're my brothers, and my duty as an older sister is to care for and protect them." — It was necessary to mention this. It was necessary to disassemble Aemond that he didn't need to feel jealous over that circumstance. — "But you're the man i love, and the man i gave myself completely to."

The last words that came out of your mouth, filled the void that was starting in Aemond's head. An emptiness he was beginning to understand there was no need for. — He might not understand or at least care about the mention of his nephews but that statement of you, was all he needed most.

"I love you and i will always love you." — You ended with your sweet statement. The words of pure honesty were carefully directed towards her lover, always being interrupted.

In the blink of an eye, in such a quick moment of time, Aemond wasted no time in bringing your lips to his. The kiss was formed in a surprising way for you, not only by the quick movement he implanted but you felt the mixture of feelings that Aemond was going through during the act. — Passion, admiration, a little anger, were in the middle of that kiss. It was easy to feel.

One of Aemond's hands roamed around your waist and lingered there, only a brief grip was left by him. It was a delicate, honest moment with pure passion, so it wasn't necessary to turn it into something more illicit at that time. — The hand that was left was glued to the side of your face, as you were doing to him.

Aemond didn't want to take his hands off you, he didn't want to lose you between his fingers. The sensation of touching you, your face, or even your waist covered by the long garment, was fascinating for the feared prince. — If you count, the feel of your sweet, so soft lips against his.

Aemond is the man you loved, and no one could tell you otherwise or try to stop your burning passion for him. The man who made you discover what the word "love" meant. — And he was the dragon who would die and kill and face anything and everything for you.

#aemond targaryen #aemond targaryen x targaryen!reader #aemond targaryen x reader #aemond targaryen x you #aemond x you #aemond x reader #aemond fanfiction #aemond the kinslayer #aemond one eye #prince aemond #aemond #house of the dragon #hotd x reader #game of thrones

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arinzu · 5 months ago

Note

How about Rin x female reader x Sae?

This is so damn rare to see, I thought itoshi bro's x reader died😭

🍂Who would you choose?🍂

This might not me accurate💕

Summary :

Little did you know... football isn't the only thing the brothers fight about. If you dont wanna read the whole story go to U20 JAPAN VS BL11 MATCH or CONFESSION or just the endings!

4 alternative endings, Itoshi brother x you, fluff, Angst ofc, weird asf, random, fem! Reader, long story, manga spoilers, curses i think!

You still remember when You and Sae first met, it was in your young elementary school days... Sae was known to be a bitch and overall is the opposite of a nice person.

......

You were playing with your toys by yourself, until you spotted a lone boy playing alone with a ball.

As you start paying more attention to him, your mother notices and smiles softly "that's Sae Itoshi"

"He's really pretty" you replied to your mom, "Can I befriend him?" You questioned.

"Are you sure? He is quite mean to people he doesn't know" She ask but after you confirm she walks away to go do her own business.

"Be careful (reader) don't get sad and try, okay?"

"I won't disappoint myself and mama!"You promised as you held your pinky finger to them, in which they agree and hold their own pinky with yours... completing the pinky promise.

You start walking towards sae, you start having second thoughts It's not your scared... You're just nervous to approach another person you don't know that well.

Oh well it's far too late since sae just noticed you approaching at a high rate.

"Uhm... Hello? My name's (last name) (reader) and I want to be your friend!" You smiled as you held out your hand expecting a handshake.

"Go away, I bet you don't even know" any football stars" sae replied stepping on the ball, you were shocked this is what a child reply to you?

"Excuse me? I do know a lot of football stars!" That took sae by surprise but still stayed firm on his word of you not knowing any players.

"Name one player, and Noel Noah doesn't count"

"Hmm it's hard..."

"Finally giving up? Just leav-" you quickly interrupted then midway.

"hey! I was talking about how hard it is to select a player out of all the amazing players out there, but anyways Chris Prince"

"Good choice? You earned my respect I suppose..."

This time he finally shake your hand, you felt a sign of relief wash over your body as you smiled at him.

"I'm Itoshi Sae, and I also apologize for my behavior earlier" he shakes your hand as he returns the smile back to you.

You noticed the ball once again, it looked rather familiar up close... Your eyes start to sparkle when you remember what type of ball it was.

"Omg it that the limited edition Football!? Signed by the one and only" you exclaimed as you start shaking the young sae, the poor boy didn't know what to do since your grip on his shoulder was to tight.

He confirmed your suspicion and you started jumping like a kangaroo from pure excitement, sae looked at you like you are a mad lady... I mean the way you're acting is uhhh....

He once again tried to ignore how you were acting, "So... How did you know the player?" He asked which made you stop what you were doing "Easy I watch football matches with my father!" You replied.

That was not what he was talking about but whatever...

You started to ramble on all of the great things you and your father did when he's in the country, in which he just listens carefully surprisingly.

After a while you had to go home you said your good bye's and left just like that.

Sae itoshi

That was a good memory to keep..

She was somewhat weird the first time we met, i suppose... her understanding of football was the one intrigue me in to her.

It compelled me to the point we started to habg out often if i wasn't busy. The more time we spent, the more of this weird sensation i have, it was like love...

I didn't understand at first but one small click in the internet had me understanding that i fell for her.

That's all you remember as you see him outside the gate waiting for you, "Itoshi Itoshi! over here" sae turns in your direction, Holding a football he starts going to you.

"You know that you can call me Sae right?" You smile softly in return to his question and start nodding.

"I know! But your fan girls might kill me" sae raised an eyebrow, he was just 12 not many people will fall in love with a 12 year old right?

"Whatever just call me Sae, (reader) we've known eachother since fourth grade"

You simply nodded as you both, "Wanna hang out at my place, sae?" Sae turned to you, he didn't know why it feels so good when you actually say his name out loud.

He hides his now covered bright pink ears from you and nodded, as you saw his happening you got curious and started nagging him why did he cover his ears from you.

"hey sae, why are you covering your ears?" You ask as you start tugging on his uniform, he wanted to say but his pride is not letting him.

'Oh sorry my ears became a bright pink as you my crush said my name out loud'

No no...

Not happening in a million years

"Ah well I heard a mosquito..." That was a Lukewarm excuse to give, but did he care absolutely not.

You start dragging him again accepting his reason like all the other times you and him hang out at your place.

"Also did you hear, Kourtney And Abigail stop being besties?" You questioned, sae just furrowed his eyebrows.

He never cared about any drama in the school, it's lukewarm and not deserving of his time. But just for you he nodded which you scream with excitement.

"Omg you finally started learning some drama, It's been so long since you actually learned some drama~!"

You continue babbling your nonsense and start adding some more gossip in the school, sae just ignored it and kept on walking with you.

You kept on talking even as you both reached your destination, sae being quite annoyed softly (maybe not so) hit your head with his fist.

"Hey what the hell sae!?, I was just getting to the good part-" sae immediately cut you off

"We're here already... And stop babbling on such Lukewarm things" sae replied his hand far gone covering his ears, which turned to it's normal color.

You got an idea ...you lean closer as you give the most cheeky smile ever,sae immediately blush.

"Hey... Sae-chan~?" You have flap your eyelashes at him.

"Y-Yeah?" Sae replied trying to hide his blushing face. Sae just screams internally as he watches you lean a centimeter closer

Oh how pathetic...

Why did I say that? It's lm a damn idiot.

Omg what if she notices my face?

Oh fuck...

"You're so lukewarm (reader)..." sae mumble which you definitely heard.

"Huh, why sae-chan?" You inch a bit closer to him.

Sae turned more red from both you and what he just said to you. He's a complete mess and your still that close to him.

Oh fuck... What have I done!?

This is so damn embarrassing.

I wanna dig a hole and jump...

And if he couldn't be blushing enough by you, he heard a small compliment it wasn't a unique one he heard it multiple times in the media, but coming from your tongue... It felt magical, sae had butterflies in his stomach.

'Sae you know, your very handsome and especially with those underlashes' he recalls what you just said, that earned him to be another blushing mess.

As he finally made himself calm down, he scanned the room to find you once he didn't see you in the room. He figured you left to go to your room, which he was grateful for...

Calming himself by inhaling and exhaling, he soon followed it to go to your bedroom after he had stopped being a mess.

As the day goes by you and him had lots of fun chatting about Life... And sae's football career and what you two will do in the future.

You reveal your dream to him and he was quite surprise by it but nonetheless wish you luck on your own journey to success.

It's been a year now, your standing at the airport seeing sae leave for spain to play in real mandrid. And most importantly you're very comfortable using sae's first name.

"Sae, please text me everyday! And reply to my calls" you not so nicely reminded.

"Yes... I know (reader) I'll do it" sae sighs as he hugs you tightly. "I'm going to miss you" you smile and return the hug "I'll miss you too its been great having you around"

"Wait sae where is your family, I never got to see them all these years? Of friendship" Sae just pointed to the side, which in return have you looking embarrass of not noticing them.

You let out a long 'ooh' as you and him approach them, once you are standing infront of his parents. You left out a bow and introduced yourself, which amazed them and patted your head.

"Good day Mr. and Mrs. Itoshi i am (last name) (reader) sae's friend"

"Woah Sae never told us your friend was such a well mannered lady!" Mrs. Itoshi remark which soon followed by Mr. Itoshi to praise you.

As soon as Mrs. And Mr. Itoshi stop admiring your good manners, you scan around to find sae, once you identify where he was and start to proceeds towards his location.

As you draw closer and closer you make-out a younger version of sae but with dark green hair.

"Hey! Sae who's that with you?" You question which sae answered truthfully.

"That's my younger brother (reader)"

"Ooo! I never knew you had a brother" you start pinching the younger brother as start complimenting his adorable appearance, rin in response annoyingly stick his tongue out.

Meanwhile sae starts glaring at Rin unconsciously, is this the last thing he sees before heading to Spain? His first crush, his love, his number 2...

(I'm sorry it's cannon that he'll choose football over you)

He snapped out of his death glare to Rin when you suddenly ask a question.

"What's his name, sae?" You asked as you finally stopped giving the younger one attention.

Sae gave a force smile and introduced him to you "That's Itoshi Rin he's 11" you thanked him and started completing rin again.

That ticked Sae off deeply as he glared at Rin to make him realize to stop hogging all of the attention.

Rin seeing his older brother sulk start walking towards him and hugging him tightly.

Rin thought it was because of him leaving the country...(It wasn't obviously)

"It's okay Nii-chan, we will give lots of gifts!" That made sae quite confused, yet seeing you again gushing of Rin endearing attempt, Sae start acting like a good older brother just for you.

"I know Rin ill be sure to be the best striker in the world, promise" Rin smile having sparkle in his eyes, having you finally turn you attention to Sae.

"Sae remember to know that I'm your number 1. fan" you jokingly reminded, rin angrily replied with "No! im his no. 1 fan, plus your a girl you dont know anything about football"

You smile internally Rin was just like Sae, yet you still was pissed at his fabricate lie. But as you were about to scold him Sae already doing the job for you.

"Rin thats rude, we dont do that anymore."

"But..." sae again glared and signal to him to apologize to you.

Once Rin finally muttered an apology for his rude behavior, you gladly accepted and told him you were more than knowledgeable in the world of football.

Rin beamed with excitement after getting confirmation from sae that it was indeed correct.

"Can you play football...?" you nodded your head that seems to make rin eye's sparkle.

As the conversation continued, Sae was called by his parents, that briefly stopped the chattering between the three people.

Its time for sae to leave the country...

You stand there feeling a mixed of sorrow and cheerfulness for you friend. You never felt this mixed of emotions at the same time, your first friend leaving you to pursue his football career.

You wave sae goodbye... having a smile of your faceyou stop him midway and hugged him "I will really miss you sae... please don't forget about me"

"I wont (reader)... dont replace me with anyone, okay?" you nodded your head and then tried to joke abit to lighten up the tension in the air. "I promise to protect rin and be his guardian for you"

Sae laughed and then made joke "Make sure he isn't a brat when i come back" you laughed and promise.

its time for the family to say their goodbye's

"Take care of your health!" Mr. itoshi said

"Good luck, sae!" said the wife waving her hand as she continued smiling

"Nii-chan, have a safe trip!" said rin and having an expression of joy

sae responded by smiling " See ya." he pause "Im off to be the best in the world" you and rin smiled and wave to sae.

you see him carrying him luggage and phone as he smiles finnaly entering the plane to spain.

Its been a couple of years, you kept the promise you made to sae to be the guardian of rin for all the years when sae was in spain. You still kept contact with sae by vc or just texting.

Itoshi family treated you as their own, and rin finally stop being rude to you as more time passed. You and rin occasionally hang out at the beach to get his mind of things with sae.

You were there for rin in every match he had, even practice.

this is one of your best interaction with rin...

...

"Hey Rinnie, do you wanna play a match with me?" you questioned which rin just nodded his head in approval. Tossing the football towards you giving you a slight advantage over him.

"Once i get the ball i win if you score you win, deal?" you nodded at the rule

You kick the ball to the left giving it a slight curve and started running, if you calculated correctly the ball will come back to your feet. But it's not that easy it's far more complicated than that...

And you know that, Afterall you saw his performance in the real matches, you know that he will catch up eventually and defeat you. But you wont make it that easy...

You hear heavy footsteps right behind you, rin was already catching up but just in time... The ball manage to came back. but as you were about to do something, rin interfered and got the ball before you got to do anything.

"(reader) you lost the game" rin said having a stoic expression. "good job rin, you were better than last time!" you smiled and gave a high five.

Rin returned the smile and high five you, you then added "Im sure sae will be impress by your growth!"

"You think so?" asked rin which you reply with "Im know so!" rin smiled from ear to ear

"Omg rin your just as cute when the first time i met you" you jokingly remark seeing his joyous expression.

"Hey I'm not cute!" rin bite back

you playfully rolled your eyes, "Whatever makes you sleep at night, i guess"

"Im literally taller now than before even taller than you!"

"So...? it doesnt mean taller people cant be cute"

"Hm. whatever you lukewarm girl" rin responded

"Oh come one have some originality will you?" you insulted in a friendly manner

"You forgot the comma" insulted back jokingly

"Oh shut up fancy pants" your eyes rolled back.

You both laugh at the weird interaction, then you suddenly suggested to buy some popsicle since it was still early.

Rin immediately screamed a yes, that caught you by surprise by his excitement. He started to drag you in a not so nearby ice cream shop.

"You'll pay right?" you nodded in agreement, as rin saw this his eyes light up and grab a quite cheap popsicle.

"I'll have this one!" you gave a nod and got your ice cream from the freezer near the entrance of the shop. you pay the money and surprisingly it was much cheaper than you expected it to be.

As yo both were eating away the ice cream rin suddenly tap your shoulder "(Reader) i won, look" you let out a smile and congratulated him.

"i got to practice again... i have to be the best after nii-chan!" rin added, you note that he is revolving around sae a bit too often, but that seems quite adorable to you.

"Okay then, i have to go back home, i have to help my mother by preparing a gift" now that statement got rin curious.

"Who's gift?" rin asked throwing away the popsicle

"My father, why do you ask?" you answered adding another question.

"Just got curious, wait father-?" rin asked once again.

"Yes for my father, what the hell are you on abo-?"

"i thought you were fatherless...." he admitted sheepishly.

He thought you would be angry, but then saw you laughing your ass your by hearing his confession.

"Wait really...?" rin nodded confirming what he just said, but seeing you laugh even more make him chuckle and blush from embracement.

You noticed it and smile still laughing uncontrollably, "i never knew the itoshi brothers could laugh"

"Oh come on! we still have emotions we just don't show it" rin snarled back having a slight cocky grin plastered on his face. meanwhile you just stared at him weirdly.

You swear you heard the same thing somewhere, after a few moments thinking where and who you chuckle a bit

"Gosh your just like sae" you sigh before continuing "He told me the same thing when he was still here"

"Wait are you serious?" you nodded and and he smiled dumbly.

"But be sure to not be an actual copy of sae, k?" rin gave a thumbs up "You are your own person and not sae itoshi's little brother"

"Oh stop, your not my mom" you smiled sticking out your tongue,, "but i am your guardian, i only want the best for you"

"Anyways i have to go for real now" you wave your hand and start smiling "dont miss me too much rinrin"

"I won't (reader)" he said ticking his tongue out.

...

From day that onwards you and him had one of the best relationship, he started being more kind to you and sometimes you guys flirted just for fun.

His teammates always ships you two together when your at his practice, which is always or every single time. Hell even his parents believe this. And that somehow ends up to you laughing it off while rin becomes a blushing mess

Rin itoshi

Have i fallen for her...?

A weird feeling, it was innocent at first but then the thought of her kept me awake at night, the way she smiled at me... the way how i felt safe around her.

She always told me to be me, and not the 'little brother of sae itoshi' she was the first to say that. How she somehow makes me chuckle at the worst joke, before i knew it i had already fallen for her.

this crap is boring you can skip it since i was trying to describe what happened in the manga.

4 years have passed since sae left to play in real mandrid, rin and his team was playing a match against a team called RIXIL . You were there supporting the team by cheering at the sideline.

The last few moments of the game rin had the ball while being press by a few defenders, dribbling pass them he runs forward towards the goal. Since you were quite knowledgeable in the world of football, you easily understand what will rin do in his situation.

His team screaming him to pass the ball with his coach, passing the ball to his teammate for that person to pass to another teammate near him to finally to finally pass to rin.

He scored the winning goal, screams of joy filled the area you quickly congratulate him on his win after the match.

"Rinrin that was an amazing goal you made!" rin blush and replied "I'll be the best in the world with nii-chan afterall!"

"You surely will, be the best with sae" you paused "What do you want for winning the match?" rin grinned at this, "Your hand in marriage, (reader)"

"If you be the world best with your brother" you smirked back.

"Oh you might as well marry me now" he stick his tongue out.

"Oh don't be so cocky with me" you feel your phone ring inside your pocket "excuse me rinrin i have to take this call"

Rin gave a thumbs up going to a bench to cool down before taking a shower, you took awhile chatting with the person on the other line.

After you ended the call you turned to rin "your mother hosted a family dinner to celebrate your win, rinrin" You gave a soft smile as you start preparing to leave.

"Where you going?" rin asked as he drink his water bottle "to help Mrs for dinner, anyways imma go now!" rin watches you leave then left out a sigh of relief

Why the hell did i say that?

That lukewarm shit was so risky...

Thank gosh she didn't notice it was real...

...

He watches his two teammates leave as it turned to a late afternoon, he note that it would probably be turning evening very soon. But he still wanted to train his skill..

He kicks a ball towards the goal, as it hit the net he think to himself how it wasn't in the spot he wanted. 'Ah. its snowing..' he thought to himself and heard a voice in the distance.

"Wasn't that shot a bit shoddy?" he looks a bit closer, it was sae his eyes lit up with joy after seeing him after all these years and blurted the word 'nii-chan'.

They both exchange pleasantries with one another, rin noticed sae wasn't feeling himself he looks... sad, unfulfilled? an emotion he never saw his brother have.

...

the clock hit (I have no idea) you started becoming worried, rin usually be home by now... thinking the worst you thought he was kidnapped, in this time many kids have been reported missing.

The more you think about it, the more you start being uneasy. note to yourself to check outside just in case rin was just running late, and if not you'll go to the football field.

You checked outside using a peephole and thankfully rin was just walking towards the door, relief washed over you and you opened the door.

"Rinrin! welcome back dinners almost ready" you smiled from ear to ear but rin just walked passed you, you didn't even bat an eye you guessed it was he got tired by practicing for so long.

You went back in the kitchen after the Mrs. of the house called your name, you helped with the last remaining dishes and prepared the table with her.

Everything has been prepared, "(reader) dear, may you please call rin down?" you smiled and nodded "Yes Mrs. i will" and there you go, going to rin's room.

As you were approaching the bedroom you hear a loud crash. Feeling fearful of what might be happening you run towards the room, you opened the door as soon you were infront of it. "Rin what happened!?" you screamed out of instinct.

"Get the fuck out of my room" yelled back rin

That startled you you never saw him this mad looking around the room you saw all of sae's awards, a few moment of silent rin gave a small sorry.

"Sorry (reader) i just had a bad day" you smiled and patted his head, "Dinners ready rinrin" you said and exited the door. You got awfully curious what happened.

As soon you sat down rin came and sat beside you, "Since everyone's here lets all pray first" said Mrs. itoshi

"Mrs?" you called out to rin's mother "May i take a picture to send to sae?" she nodded as she signal for everyone to hold hands to pray.

After praying you took out your phone and as intended "Say cheese everyone!" as you held your phone up high for everyone to see. You soon took the photo

" いただきます" (its Itadakimasu its said before eating) said the group

"Woah this is delicious!" said mr. itoshi "who made this?" Mrs. Itoshi replied with your name.

"You would make a wonderful housewife!" said Mr. itoshi

"Im flattered by your kind words Mr. itoshi!" you replied

"So are you planning to marry one of our sons, (reader)?" you nodded your head chuckling slightly

"I might marry one of them, or even both of them!" the parents laughed and you also joined in laughing

Rin blushed he had a chance getting with you? and even marrying you? that would be a dream come true, he just to make sure sae hadn't have any feeling for you.

After you finish eating your meal, you thank Mrs. Itoshi for inviting you as a guest.

You returned home safely, but as you were about to fall asleep you remembered the photo you took with the family. You opened the app and send the photo with the caption.

"celebrating rin's amazing goal!" and "wish you were here with us"

And then drifted to sleep... the next day you check you Messager app to see sae's respond to your text. It was the normal response but something caught your eye, the last message.

"I'm changing my dream i wanna be the world best midfielder" being the good friend you are you supported his decision with open arms.

It's been a few months almost a year by now, your relationship with him wasn't the same ever since that day. Rin was cold to you, not starting a conversation. he wasn't particularly rude just silent.

He was different as you kept noticing this you felt uneasy. You did try to ask him what happened yet he didn't answer, whenever you mention sae he just glared at you until you drop it.

That continued on... until he went to a facility called "blue lock" to be the best striker in Japan.

You couldn't able to contact him, you brush it off as he was probably busy. Being quite lonely you tried to reach sae but that ended in failure.

JAPAN U20 VS BLUE LOCK 11

"(Reader) quick your going to be late!" said your mother as she got the keys of the car to tossed it to you.

You catch the keys "Ma, don't worry" you quickly replied getting your purse.

"Gosh (reader) you got the front seats by the itoshi family hurry up!"

"I know ma! I'm very excited" you responded as you exit the house and got in the car.

"Make sure to give me and your father some gifts!" you agreed and quickly drive to the location.

You arrived just in time to be able to buy some merch, looking around the area you find the perfect thing, a rin plushie and a sae jersey its was hella expensive, if you didn't get a discount you would have been on the headline being the poorest person in Japan.

wait what time is it...?

Oh I'm actually going to be late.

Wtf i sound so calm!?

You start walking faster and by pure luck manage to get to your seat in time (barely...), you look around to find the couple that bought the seats.

Fuck where are they?

What in the actual ass!?

As you were silently in the seat thinking they cancelled the purchase, you felt a beep inside your bag. You took your phone to check what's up with it

"Sorry (reader), we both had an emergency and have to tend to it, your own your own" text by Mrs. Itoshi

Well that's a relief...

I was about to dig a hole and burry myself

Time to enjoy the game!

Getting comfortable in your seat you remembered the jersey you bought, 'Might as well wear it' you slid inside the jersey as you waited for the match to start

You watch eagerly at the entrance of the field where the players will appear, As you see both teams emerge from the shadows. The crowd screams 'itoshi sae' as soon you he appeared. even some screaming a popular defender name 'Aiku'

Joining in the screaming you loudly yelled sae's name.

"Sae, don't disappoint me, give me a good match to watch!" repeating sae's name like a chant while smiling from ear to ear. You remembered to cheer for rin also.

Gathering all the air in your lungs to scream the hardest you can you wave your hand franticly, closing your eyes you gave your all in that scream.

"RINNIE-SANNNN WIN THE MATCH, DONT DISSAPOINT!!!" you thought you were about to pass out from how loud you cheer, but that was worth it since rin looked to your direction, you gave the biggest smile as you were still waving.

Little did you know rin was stabbing daggers at what you were wearing.

Sportscaster and football commentator start talking you fell back to your seat feeling tired. Paying your attention to the field.

(if you wanted me to explain the whole match i aint doing it but check the manga if you are interested)

The second half was over it was so intense you were dancing with excitement on how good the match was, sae's first goal to seishiro goal then the last goal of the fist half made by rin himself.

It was truly amazing first half, the blue lockers having a one point advantage against the the U20, as bought a soda from the soda boy cooling down before looking at the field, there's rin looking at you.

"Rinrin! congrats on that amazing goal you made!" you yelled giving a heart shape pose while sticking your tounge out.

Rin flip you off. that was unexpected...

"WHAT THE FUCK RIN!?" you yelled almost causing a commotion but thankfully you control your temper, you didn't wanna just do nothing so you double flip him.

He just stick his tongue out in response.

You calm yourself down and got your phone out to text sae, you pretty sure that it was allowed.

(Second half has ended)

Amazing those blue lockers won against the U20

the final score was 3-4 first goal was sae, then seishiro, then rin, next two goals were the pink demon the zesty one called shidou, finnaly was barou and the last goal was isagi. Screams of joy filled the stadium both with the winning players and the audience.

And there was Isagi's speech!

Overall if you had to rate the match it would be (your decision), you quickly got off your seat to meet with sae just he had planned.

Waiting outside the main gate you stayed there until sae arrived.

"Sae! over here" you called as sae start approaching you

"Ah hello (reader)-" "Wait is that my jersey?"

"Oh fuck i completely forgot that i was still wearing this..."

"you look adorable..."

"what was that"

"Nothing..."

"Wait can you sign this jersey"

"Sure" sae's ears start becoming pink

"Thank you, ilysm!"

"i love you too..."

"anyways bye! get some rest sae!" he nodded as you walk away.

That conversation you had with him was much more... something. But that was fine, he is probably tired from the match.

You went home since rin wasn't able to go home just yet and it was getting late, you arrived home and went to your feeling exhausted.

CONFESSION

Its been a while just a week since the match, you have scheduled to meet in a private beach with rin and sae.

You manage to convince rin with some hesitation from his side surprisingly.

Meanwhile sae agreed with any hesitation now that really surprise you to the point you thought he was a doubleganger.

You awaited for their arrival but then you saw your reflection in the sea, your hair was very messy. So being a sane person you pull out your comb and brush your hair.

As you were about to finish the comb broke in two...

Sae came first with a bouquet of flowers and stand their Infront of you.

"(Reader) i love you, be mine" he said in the most deadpan tone you ever heard, you look closely at his expression you saw a faint blush.

What the actual fuck?

Is this a dream?

I need to wake the fuck up.

"WHAT THE FUCK!?" you thought that was you but you notice that you didn't say anything.

You see rin approaching no... running towards your direction holding a teddy bear in his left hand and a heart shape container.

Before you knew it rin punched sae in his guts, that scene looks like it came from a romance movie.

Then sae punched back which you assume was for self-defense, the more they fought the more you panic trying to de-escalate the situation.

In a last ditch effort you screamed

"Stop it you guys, y'all are fighting like animals!" if they ignore this you might as well enjoy the drama, eat some popcorn and and sit down.

Rin came to his senses first and stop, apologizing to you. Sae glared at him, and was about to throw another punch. As you were about to get some popcorn to eat sae stop mid-punch.

"Okay what the actual fuck is going on with all of you!?" you yelled.

"because that idiot gave you a lukewarm confession when i was suppose to confess to you!" said rin

"The only lukewarm thing here was your goal and existence, annoying pest"

"Wait rin you were going to confess?"

"Yes (reader) are you going deaf from his confession already?"

"Can i hear it?" you asked

"Not infront of him!" yelled rin

"just damn do it rin" you responded

he paused blushing from embarrassment, lowering his head an holding his arms out with the gifts he brought.

"(reader) be at my side and watch me be the no 1. striker"

"Woah that was extremely lukewarm, rin"

"Oh shut the fuck up"

"So who do you choose?"

HALF FOR EACH OF US

Gore, jjk reference, kidnapping, but don't worry you didn't die hopefully.

Ending :1/4 you reject them both

"I'm sorry guys but I'm not choosing any of you..." you saw the hurt in their eyes, you watch how their heart was broken, but when you tried to apologize again they scream.

"Fucking get away (reader)" rin yelled

"You'll regret this" you felt the air tense up once sae told you this so you left the scene.

You live your life with the guilt of knowing you broke their hearts.

You entered a coffee shop to meet up with a old buddy you knew, before you knew it there was a sharp pain at your forehead then you passed out.

As you opened your eyes you felt a wet liquid dripping down, as you tried to wipe it you notice you couldn't move your hand freely.

"Whoops your already awake" you heard a voice speak up "I'll inform them"

"What the-"

You saw a few people entered as your vision start becoming clearer, the only people you recognize was the itoshis.

"I'll take the bottom part"

"We know, you ass lover"

'What are they talking about?'

"Oh (reader) only if you just accepted one of us" you saw him gave a cocky grin but instead of laughing you felt uneasy.

"Shut up, rin" Rin rolled his eyes at sae reponse.

"Don't worry (reader) the operation won't hurt" sae added

"Operation?" you asked still feeling the sharp pain.

"We're cutting you in half, ill have the upper part and that ass lover be having your bottom" rin answered putting his hand on his hip

"The actual hell?"

They ignored you and signal the other people to take you to a room, there in the room they made you drink a liquid and you soon passed

yes i was being lazy i want to be done

Fleeing Japan to go to Spain

Childhood friends to lovers, Popular x Normal.

Ending 2/4 : You choose sae over rin.

"I choose you sae... I'm sorry rin"

"See rin you shouldn't have even tried, she always would choose me"

"I'm really sorry rin"

"Don't. be. (reader). i. fucking. hate. you. for. this."

You tried to apologize again but this time rin glared at you and you stop mid-way, "(reader) i have to go now." rin said as you throwed away the gifts he had in his hand to the trash.

You tried to get the gifts out of the trash but sae stop you, "(reader) those are dirty don't pick it up"

as you were about to argue with him that it's not that dirty anymore, you look at sae's eyes it was like the eyes of someone hopelessly inlove.

"I really do love (reader) im very grateful that you choose me... i will the best lover you'll ever have" you laugh at this and cup this face "Lets see Mr. prodigy~" you saw sae's face turned bright red and chuckle, sae hugged you .

"I wanna let you know a secret i always loved you from the start" you didn't know how to respond so you blush. "I love you" you nodded "I love you too Mr. Prodigy"

The moment you turned eighteen sae gave you the offer of flying to spain so you could both could live together at this luxurious penthouse. You gladly accepted because of the con's and since sae also offered to pay for your collage so you could achieve your dreams.

Be the no 1. lover

Brother's childhood friend, opposites attract.

Ending 3/4 : you choose rin over sae

"...I choose you rin" you replied pointing at rin direction, rin quickly jumped towards you and hugged you tightly

"I promise to give you the VIP seats when i become the best in the world" rin replied almost suffocating you.

"Im sorry sae" you apologize to sae and he started approaching you handing the bouquet of flowers, "I'm done with Japan, i only stayed for this long so i could confess to you"

He told you as he started walking away with his hands in his pocket, you felt bad for rejecting him but you still have rin with you.

"I love you so much (reader) thank you for choosing me and not him" said rin as he kiss your forehead. "I love you for eternity" as he approach your lips. and gave you a kiss.

That surprise you and rin notices "Im sorry (reader) im just so happy" you smiled at this and gave him a small kiss at his cheek, that ended up with him blushing uncontrollably.

"I love you (reader)"

"Me too rin"

You both smiled dumbly and went to get some popsicle. Once the blue lock project started, you just watch him at the bllk tv and texting him or calling him daily he made sure that you felt loved. He was sure the best lover you had.

Why not have the best of two worlds?

Two lovers, harem? i have no idea what is this

Ending 4/4 : you choose them both...

"uhm... i choose you both" they both stared at you in confusion, rin was the first to confirm what you just said, to his astonishment you didn't make a mistake of choosing.

"Well i call dibs on Sunday to Wednesday" said sae as rin glared at him, "I call dibs at the rest then." rin replied handing you the gifts he had bought to you.

"Your coming with me (reader) since it's Tuesday" sae said as he start dragging you to the local mall.

"Hey, that's not fair!" you heard rin yelled to sae but he didn't stop but just continued to drag you away from the beach.

And that's how your relationship with both itoshi brothers started, of course you manage to make a better way of dating each of them. But overall rin and sae were pretty much cool with eachother, no arguing, no drama, it was peaceful most of the time.

You will surely tell your future children how you met their fathers... You never felt neglected by them or make them feel neglected when you all were dating, even now you still look back in the past and wondered what will happen if you choose only one.

But you didn't think that deeply since you have two wonderful lovers by your side.

Did i lose motivation every single day and wish to have a proper sleep schedule? yes i did. Did i wanted to delete the whole fanfic since i thought it was cringe? i was going too but i made too much progress ANYWAYSSS TYSM FOR READING THIS PIECE OF CRAP <3 AND STAY TUNED FOR THE HEADCANNOS The whole fic was uncannon and cannon randomly since i kept getting distracted by the manga! My sleep schedule is ass :D

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clarisse0o · 2 months ago

Text

Camp Wiegman-Part 83

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe: Military School

Words: 5K

Masterlist

———————————————————————

A few weeks later...

Saturday, June 18; 1:00 p.m. - Batlle Residence.

“You look stunning,” murmurs Lucy as I gaze at myself in the mirror.

A smile forms on my lips as I hear her voice. Indeed, I feel especially beautiful on this very special day. I turn toward her. She’s standing at the entrance of my room, wearing her beautiful long dress that matches mine. We’ve been separated during our preparations, and I don’t regret it. Seeing her now, when we last saw each other in pajamas, is extraordinary.

“You’re not looking bad yourself,” I say, making her chuckle.

She slowly approaches me, as if savoring the moment. I know I am, at least. She gently wraps her arms around me and leans in toward my face.

“No! Don’t kiss me now. We’ll mess up our lipstick.”

“As if that’s something that would stop me.”

I giggle against her lips as she kisses me anyway.

“You have no respect, Miss Bronze.”

“Oh, you’re finally deciding to use formal language with me? It’s about time.”

I burst out laughing, hiding in her neck. We’ve come a long way since that first day when she threw me out of my bed.

“Better late than never… right?”

“Hmm…,” she breathes in amusement. “By the way, how’s your mother feeling?”

“I haven’t seen her since earlier, but she seemed super stressed.”

“Stressed?” repeats Bronze, raising an eyebrow. “I didn’t get that impression this morning.”

“Well, it changed since then. I had to call the caterer, the servers, and the florist to make sure everything was in order. Even though we’ve been preparing everything frantically over the past few days, she’s afraid something might go wrong.”

“I see,” she chuckles.

“Ona! Mom’s calling you.”

I sigh heavily, which amuses my girlfriend. I’m starting to regret accepting my role as a first maid. She keeps overburdening me. Yet, on the other hand, I think this is the first time we’ve been so close.

“I’ll go with you.”

“Thanks.”

We follow my little brother to the master bedroom, where my mother is getting ready with the help of professionals. Actually, we all received the same special treatment. My mother didn’t want us to worry about anything, and I must admit it was quite pleasant.

“Ah, there you are finally,” she says upon our arrival. “And with Lucy. You’re already ready, I see. You both look fabulous.”

“Thank you,” I say, blushing slightly.

“I was about to put on my dress. Would you like to help?”

“Yes, if you want.”

“Maybe I should leave…” says my girlfriend softly.

“Oh no, please stay. It makes me happy, and I’m not embarrassed at all. Unless you are.”

“No, no, it’s fine.”

My mother takes off her clothes, leaving only her underwear. Lucy has joined my brother, who sat on the bed to watch. When one of the professionals opens the cover protecting the dress, we all fall silent with anticipation. My mother chose it before we arrived in Barcelona, and we wanted to keep it a surprise since we already know everything else. It was our only surprise, and it was worth it.

“Wow, it’s beautiful.”

The dress seems long and straight. Knowing my mother, I bet she opted for a train. She chose this style for her wedding with my father. From what I can see, the sleeves are made of lace, like the front of the dress. However, as you look lower, the material becomes lighter. It’s beautiful, no doubt about it.

“Come help us, Ona.”

I quickly join them to help take it out of the cover. There are two of us holding it as my mother puts it on. I didn’t expect it, but it’s heavy. I’m relieved when we button it at the neck. We couldn’t see it before, but the back is completely open. My mother, who is slender, wears it wonderfully.

“He won’t be able to say no when he sees you in this,” I say, making her laugh.

“I sure hope so, yes. Especially after ten years together.”

Ten years already... How time flies. The atmosphere is broken by the front door slamming. No one should be coming here. Marcus went to get ready at a hotel downtown, where his sister is staying for the festive weekend.

“Ona?”

“Well, it seems there are others who are ready,” I say, recognizing Mapi.

“I’ll go welcome them,” Lucy offers.

“Thank you.”

She goes off, taking Joan, who was getting restless here. Meanwhile, I turn back to my mother, who is looking at herself in the mirror. I feel a slight lump in my stomach from anticipation. I know today is going to be a big day.

“I’m happy for you, Mom.”

She turns around to give me a smile.

“You know what makes me the happiest?”

I shake my head.

“What makes me the happiest is that you’re here, with me on this day. I’m very proud to be the mother of such a beautiful, strong, and exceptional woman like you.”

“Mom…”

I try to interrupt her, but she raises her hand. A small lump forms in my throat. I expected a little speech today, but I’m not sure I’m ready to hear it. Yet, these past few days have been indescribable. I’ve felt a real connection with my mother.

“I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life, Ona. The worst was certainly not trusting you enough, my own daughter. I compared you to myself for a long time, and I shouldn’t have. Your father always told me that you inherited his wisdom and determination, but I never wanted to listen.”

I feel really strange. She has never spoken to me so openly before. I’m on the verge of tears, but I hold back.

“You’ve followed your own path, and from now on, I will support you, no matter what.”

I nod because I can’t speak at this moment. It’s the first time she’s said these words to me, and coming from her, it touches me deeply. I let her hold me in her arms.

“You’ve found a gem to support you in the future that awaits you. Lucy has my full gratitude, both as a person and for what she has done for you.”

“Thank you, Mom…”

“I know I haven’t always expressed it well, but I love you very much, Ona. You are my only daughter. I have two children now, but that doesn’t change the love I’ve had for you since your birth.”

I sigh softly with a small smile on my lips. It’s really what I needed for this day.

“I love you too, Mom.”

She steps back, and I’m surprised to see her in the same state as me. Tears have streamed down our cheeks.

“I think we need a little touch-up on our makeup before going downstairs.”

I chuckle, agreeing. I get my makeup redone first. Then, I leave the professionals with my mother so they can finalize the last details. When I come down the stairs, I’m greeted by whistles from my best friend.

“Looking hot, Batlle.”

I laugh softly, accepting the hug she offers when I reach her. Discreetly, she lifts the dress to see my shoes.

“And heels too. I thought you weren’t walking very straight.”

“Well, thanks! I practiced all week!”

I make everyone laugh with my comment. But it’s true. I continue my greetings with Ingrid, who has obviously been invited. It’s very strange to see her in a dress, she whom I’ve always seen in uniform or jeans, but it suits her very well.

“So? Is she almost ready?” Lucy asks me. “The car has arrived.”

“That’s good news. She won’t be stressed waiting.”

“That’s what I thought,” she giggles. “And you, are you okay?”

She strokes my cheek when I’m in her arms. She noticed. I must still have slightly puffy eyes. I smile and nod.

“Absolutely fine. I feel like today is going to be unforgettable.”

- That's good to hear.

She kisses me before I turn to our friends.

“Okay. I think we still have a little time. What do you say we wait in the living room? Would anyone like something to drink?” I suggested.

“No, thank you. We might spill something on ourselves.”

Ingrid is absolutely right. We join my brother, who’s already watching TV to pass the time. Meanwhile, we chat while we wait for my mother to arrive. She finally shows up half an hour later.

“Wow, Abby! You really went all out!” my best friend exclaims when she sees her.

Indeed, there’s nothing to say—she looks stunning.

“Hello, girls.”

“You really outdid yourself!”

“Can we go now?” my brother asks.

“Yes, Jo, we’re going,” I laugh. “Everyone must be waiting for us eagerly.”

After almost a month, it was time for this day to finally come. When we step outside, an old convertible Chevrolet from the 1980s is waiting for us. It was reserved by Hector, who is standing next to the car in a suit. I hold the train of the dress with Mapi as we walk down the steps.

“You look gorgeous, Abby,” says our driver as he opens the door.

“Thank you, Hector.”

“Here are the keys to your car,” he says, handing them to me.

“Thanks. We’ll meet you there.”

“Yes, see you in a bit.”

My mom gives me a final hug before getting into the car. Our ride for the day will be my mom’s car. We had fun decorating it this morning whenever we had a spare moment. I hand the keys to Lucy since she’s driving. Ingrid joins her in the front while I share the back seat with Joan and Mapi. We head out first to the place where everyone is waiting for our arrival. The lively atmosphere in the car makes the drive feel shorter. Before I know it, Lucy is parked, and I’m holding onto her arm as we walk toward Marcus, who is waiting outside the church doors. We move through the crowd of both families, greeting people I haven’t seen in a while. My mom organized a dinner with them last night for this purpose. Lucy was wonderful; she took the time to meet everyone and chat a bit with them. Since my mom is an only child, there aren’t many people my age, but it didn’t seem to bother her. I was happy to see everyone again. Lucy reminded me of the importance of family. On the other hand, I can’t say the same for Joan. Since no one has seen him since he was born, he was the center of attention all evening. I think he’s been a bit traumatized because he hasn’t dared to leave Lucy’s side whenever I’m busy or not around. He’s actually following us closely right now. We finally reach Marcus, who’s wearing a three-piece suit.

“You’re finally here,” he says with relief when he sees us.

“Hi, Marcus,” I tease lightly. “A bit nervous?”

“A little, yes,” he admits. “How’s your mom holding up?”

“She seems to be in the same state as you. But she’s doing fine.”

He smiles and nods gently.

“Don’t worry. Everything is in order.”

“Thanks, it’s nice of you to handle all this.”

“It’s no problem.”

Thanks to Ingrid and Mapi, the guests begin to enter the church. We step aside to let them go in. My stepfather is extremely nervous. He knows she’ll be here soon.

“She’s eager to see you,” I whisper to him.

“So am I,” he replies. “Thank you for being there for her these past few weeks. It meant a lot to her.”

“I know. I’m sorry I wasn’t very kind to you these past years.”

“You don’t need to apologize. Your reasons were completely justified. Even though your father hid his feelings from you, he felt the same way for a long time.”

I can’t hide my surprise.

“Really? He made me believe otherwise. He told me he wanted mom to be happy.”

“He did. That’s why he hid it from you.”

“Why?”

“He wanted the happiness of the two women in his life—your mom and you. In a way, he was glad your mom wasn’t alone. But he didn’t like that it was me, given that I was his long-time partner in the army…”

I nod. That’s completely understandable. I wouldn’t have liked it either.

“But he knew your mom wanted to win your love, and your father knew that. So he hid his resentment, which gradually faded over the years.”

I don’t know what to say. Even two years after his death, I’m still learning about all the incredible things he did for me.

“Your father was a great man, Ona. You were lucky to have him as a dad. I know I can never replace him, and that’s not my intention at all, but… I’m going to become your mother’s husband, and she cares deeply about you. Because of that, I intend to support you as best as I can, no matter what you think of me.”

“Yes, of course, you could never replace my father, Marcus. But if I accepted to be my mother’s maid of honor, it’s to show my support for your commitment.”

“Thank you,” he smiles sincerely. “It means a lot to us.”

Joan catches my attention by tugging on the hem of my dress.

“Ona, mom is here,” my brother announces.

I see the car approaching. I glance at Marcus, who immediately understands.

“I’ll see you soon.”

I return to Lucy, who’s surrounded by our friends.

“I thought our job would be more difficult,” Mapi says to me.

“So did I,” I admit.

“Well, let’s head inside then. See you in a bit.”

“Yes, see you soon.”

She goes inside, leaving only Lucy and me, as Joan has gone in with her father. I take the opportunity to find her arms again. She kisses my forehead.

“I love you,” she whispers.

I smile, resting my head against her chest.

“Did you hear?”

“Mmm-hmm,” she replies. “I’m glad everything is finally getting resolved in your family.”

I nod with a big smile.

I finally step away from her when my mother arrives.

“I’m nervous,” she confesses, making us laugh.

“That’s normal; it’s your day, Abby,” my girlfriend replies.

“Did you see Marcus?”

“Yes, he went inside when we saw the car coming.”

She nods before sighing softly.

“It’s time to go in. Unless you’ve changed your mind…”

She laughs, shaking her head.

“No, we can go.”

Since no one is escorting her, she at least wanted someone to accompany her, and that’s us. Lucy extends her arm for me to take.

“Miss.”

I giggle, stepping away from her. I glance at my mom before leading the way down the church aisle. As we enter, the organ begins to play. I get chills. This is it—the ceremony is starting. I have butterflies in my stomach again, but now I know it’s just anticipation.

Saturday, June 18th, 6:00 PM – Batlle Residence

It’s done. They did it. They’re finally married. The effort we put in was intense, but everything looks truly magnificent. We have every reason to be proud of ourselves. My mom didn’t want to deal with booking a venue, so she thought our garden was big enough to accommodate everyone. I was skeptical at first, but in the end, the result is truly incredible. A white canopy stretches from the roof of the terrace to the garden trees. The rest is decorated with lanterns and fairy lights everywhere. It’s very colorful, but it creates a real atmosphere. If it’s not the lights, it’s the flowers my mom insisted on having. I thought there would be too many, but it turns out I was wrong. Since we’re in a garden, it looks fantastic. Right now, I’m with Lucy, Mapi, and Ingrid, each with a glass of champagne in hand. I already know we’ll be spending the evening together. Having been involved in the preparations, I made sure we’re at the same table since they’re round tables.

“So, now that everything’s over and we finally have time to talk… How did your exams go?”

“You’re really starting off strong,” Lucy teases.

“What? She hasn’t talked about them since we got here.”

“Well… I’m not sure, actually. I have mixed feelings, so I prefer not to talk about it.”

“Oh… Was it that tough?”

“Yeah, pretty much. I worked hard, but I don’t know… There are several subjects I’m unsure about.”

I lean back against Lucy, who pulls me into her arms.

“You doubt yourself too much, honey.”

“No, seriously. I don’t know, and it’s stressing me out. If I pass, it will be by a very narrow margin.”

“You’re talking nonsense. I saw you work tirelessly for five months. If you don’t pass, it would be totally undeserved.”

“Anyway, the results come out in two weeks.”

“That’s true. By the way, since I’m moving in with you for good, can I go with you to get the results?”

“Yes, of course. Mom and Joan will be there too.”

My mom insisted on being there. She even took time off work for the event. Naturally, Joan wanted to come too, so he’ll be pulled out of school a week early. For once, we’ll be the ones welcoming her… It’s strange to think she’ll be coming to *our* place.

- Oh, that’s so cool! I’ve always wanted to see that famous school.

- It’s going to be so weird.

Not only will it be the last time we go there, but all my loved ones will be coming with me.

- How are you going to tell your school friends? she asks us.

I shrug and glance at Lucy.

- I don’t know. We haven’t planned anything. We’ll see when the time comes. It’ll probably be in the evening or something like that.

Lucy nods in agreement. I don’t want to overthink it anymore. It’s time to relax until the next school term. I had to clear out my room at school, and with Lucy’s optimism, I left with the idea that I wouldn’t be going back. It’s a bit heartbreaking. Alexia and I did one last tour of the school to reminisce about every part of it. After all, we’re leaving behind a lot of memories. Good ones, as well as bad. The most important thing is that we’ve freed up our spots for those who come after us. It’s nice to know others will get to experience what we did.

- Babe, I think your mom wants to see you, Lucy points out.

- Hmm?

I look in her direction and see my mom waving at me. Poor thing, she must be overwhelmed with all these people coming to congratulate them.

- I’ll go see her.

- I’ll go with you, Mapi says immediately.

I give Mapi a smile before giving Lucy a quick kiss.

- See you in a bit.

We head off, leaving them behind.

- Everything okay? I ask my mom once I’m beside her.

- Could you get us something to drink, please? We’re about to dry out.

- Yes, of course.

- Is everything going well on your side?

- Yes, yes. We made the rounds. Everyone seems to be having a good time.

- That’s good. That’s what matters most.

- I think the crowd will thin out soon. That would be nice.

- Yes, we’ll see. We’re not going to kick them out either.

- True. Well, we’ll go get your drinks and be right back.

- Thank you.

Mapi and I head towards the buffet. She puts her arm around my shoulders while we wait for our turn.

- So, when are you going to take the plunge?

- Shh, don’t talk about that here.

- It’s fine, they’re far away. Are you going to wait until you’re back in Manchester?

I roll my eyes, knowing she won’t drop the subject.

- If you really want to know, I’ve already got everything planned out. Unfortunately for you, you won’t know anything from now on. You’d probably spill the beans.

- Pff. You’re mean! I bet Alexia knows, though!

I giggle and nod.

- Yeah. Actually, she’s the one who gave me advice.

- I can’t believe it! You traitors!

I laugh, unable to hold it in. Finally, it’s our turn. I ask for two cocktails for the newlyweds. While waiting to be served, I look towards Lucy, but my view is blocked by a man whose silhouette I recognize instantly.

- Sam! I realized I hadn’t seen you yet.

- Hey, beautiful.

We exchange a hug before I notice the person beside him. My smile widens as I realize it’s Paolo.

- What a surprise. We finally meet!

- Hello, Ona, he says with amusement.

His voice is deep. He’s even more handsome in person than in photos. I’m glad to see that things are working out for them. Samuel told me they’re getting married after Paolo proposed. I’m really happy for them.

- Well, I don’t need to introduce you, Sam jokes. I talk about you two enough to each other.

- I’m so glad to see you both. How are you doing?

- Really well. You’ve done an amazing job. The garden looks beautiful.

- My mom picked everything, but she really made good choices.

- Absolutely. Isn’t Lucy with you?

- She’s over there with Ingrid. We came to get drinks for the newlyweds.

I turn to Mapi, noticing that she’s taken the drinks. She takes the opportunity to greet the guys, then we step away from the buffet to make room for the next in line.

- Do you know where we’ll be seated? Sam asks. I didn’t want to be nosy and wander around the tables.

- You’ll be with us, at the table to the left of the newlyweds. Since it was just us girls, I thought a bit of masculinity wouldn’t hurt.

- Of course! he jokes. That’s great. At least we won’t be with strangers.

- We wouldn’t do that. Sofia and her husband will be with us too. I wanted to be with people I’m used to being around at the table.

- You’re right. Anyway, I doubt we’ll be sitting much. There’s already good music, so I’m not worried about the rest of the night.

- No, definitely not.

- Well, we’ll let you get back to your mom. Can you tell me where your friends are? We’d like to say hi to them too.

- Over there, I say, pointing them out.

- Great. See you in a bit.

- Yep. See you soon.

We return to my mom with the drinks. The evening continues on. As expected, people who were only invited for the reception are slowly leaving, leaving only close friends and family behind. I gently encourage everyone to take their seats before joining mine between Lucy and Samuel.

- Everything okay? my girlfriend teases gently. You look like you’re running all over the place.

- No, you think?

She laughs softly. She opens her arms, and I lean into her to kiss her cheek.

- I’m staying here now.

- That works for me.

I smile, looking around. I made a good choice for our table. Everyone is already chatting with each other. Mapi and Sam are bickering. Ingrid is getting to know Sofia better, while Paolo and James, Sofia’s husband, are talking about sports. It seems like that topic always brings people together. The first servers are making their rounds to start serving wine, followed by the first course. My mom had already chosen the menu before we arrived, so it’ll be a surprise from start to finish. I finally relax and enjoy the evening and the meal, engaging with the rest of the table.

Sunday, June 19; 2:30 AM - Batlle Residence.

It’s getting late. Some guests—the older ones—have already left the party. It’s been lively from start to finish, filled with emotion. There was the first dance, as well as games and even speeches. I gave an impromptu speech before dessert. After what my mom and Marcus said this morning, I felt compelled to speak to them from the heart too. Of course, it ended in tears. Right now, I’m in Lucy’s arms, swaying gently to the sound of the last few songs, which have become more mellow.

- Are you getting tired?

- No. I think the alcohol is wearing off. It’s lowering my adrenaline.

- Hmm... so that’s it.

I recognize her amused look. I must admit, I did drink a bit tonight. Between the champagne, cocktails at the reception, and wine at the table, I indulged a bit. Not to the point of being drunk, but enough to feel good. I stopped when my head started to spin.

- Do you find that funny? I ask with a small smile.

- Not at all. It’s just that alcohol makes you happier, it’s funny.

- Yes, that’s true.

I rest my head on her shoulder until the end of the song. I love being in her arms. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of it. She kisses my temple at the end, pulling away slightly.

- Are you sure you don’t want to head back? It’s getting late.

- No, but we can rest a bit further away if you want.

- Okay, I’ll follow you.

Our garden is big, so there’s space to go further back. I grab her hand and lead her to the back, where the lanterns continue to light up along the fences. Lucy wraps her arm around my shoulders as my head rests against hers.

- I’ve never seen this pond up close before, she says as we approach it.

It’s big, with a small wooden bridge built over it. Marcus himself made it. He loves nature, so he wanted to make the garden as lush and natural as possible. For the occasion, the bridge has also been wrapped in string lights. It was probably the perfect moment, surrounded by these colorful lights.

Come on.

Her smile widens as I pull her toward it.

- "Slowly, babe," she says, laughing.

The music was still audible in the distance. A new slow song had started after a more upbeat one. Seeing the look in Lucy’s eyes, she must be thinking the same thing as me.

- “One last dance for tonight?”

- “I could do plenty more with you. You certainly know how to handle your dance partners.”

- “There’s only one partner I really enjoy dancing with,” she says, placing her hand on my hip.

- “Hmm. I like the sound of that.”

I wrap my arms around her again and kiss her deeply. If I had to, I’d stay here all night. We enjoy the dance quietly, which ends far too quickly for my liking. As another upbeat song starts, Lucy lets go of me. Now she’s leaning over the railing to look at the pond. I stand beside her, feeling a slight anxiety rising within me. I could tell it was the moment. I fumble through my little purse that I’ve carried all evening. It was a bit annoying, but I had no other choice. My hands are shaking.

- “What are you doing?”

I jump and look up at Lucy, who’s watching me with her head tilted.

- “Nothing. Just looking for something.”

- “Do you need help?”

I shake my head. Please, that’s the last thing I need. I feel like I’m messing everything up. Alexia told me to just do it without overthinking. Maybe I should have been better prepared and enlisted Mapi's help. I look up again as I finally get my hands on the object I’ve been searching for. Lucy seems amused by me, with her little smile.

- “Did you find it?”

I clear my throat, blushing slightly.

- “Yes.”

I take a deep breath. There’s no turning back now, and anyway, I’m sure about this. I’m just a bit panicked about how to do it.

- “Lucy... I...”

I can’t bring myself to look at her, but her hand caressing my cheek makes me do it.

- “Relax. It’s just us. Why are you so nervous? What’s wrong?”

I bite my lip. She looks so beautiful standing in front of me. I’m really lucky to have her in my life. These thoughts give me courage. I’ve decided; I want to do this right.

- “I had a long speech prepared, but honestly, I can’t even remember it anymore.”

She laughs softly. It’s a sound I’ll never tire of, just like her green eyes that gaze at me so intensely. They captivated me from the very first time we met.

- “A speech for what, hmm?”

Without another word, I drop to one knee, and Lucy’s smile grows. I let go of my purse and take out a small box I haven’t released since this whole setup began. It’s a bit messy, and I really wish I had planned things better, but I know I’ll make up for it later.

- “I love you, Lucy. Since you’ve been in my life, I’ve never been so happy. You are an incredible woman who makes me the happiest person in the world. It was hard to win your heart, but now that I have it, I want to make you mine forever. So…”

My throat is tight, but I’m not stopping now. I open the little box to reveal the ring I chose for her recently with Mapi’s help. Her eyes fill with tears.

- “Lucy Bronze, will you marry me, for better or for worse?”

Despite her tears, she laughs softly. She’s making me feel all kinds of emotions. It’s such an intense moment. I’m tearing up myself, seeing her so overwhelmed. I went through so much to get to this point, here in front of her, down on one knee. I even asked her parents for her hand during our visit last month. I wanted to do things right. Her answer takes a while to come. She finally searches through her own clutch before joining me on the ground with a box similar to mine in her hands. My eyes widen in surprise as I look at her. I can barely see her now through the tears that have filled my eyes.

- “Sorry, sweetheart, but... You haven’t exactly been discreet with Mapi these past few weeks.”

My mouth falls open, but she manages to grab my attention by opening the box. The ring is beautiful. It looks a lot like the one I chose for her. It has a big diamond on top and smaller ones set along the band.

- “I love you, my love. Of course, I want to be your wife... But only if you agree to be mine.”

I’m definitely crying now. I can’t believe it. I was so nervous about proposing, thinking it was too soon.

- “Of course! But... but, since when did you want to…?”

I can’t finish my sentence. Lucy chuckles softly.

- “For a while, actually…”

I blink at her words. It’s really too good to be true.

- “I asked your mom during our last visit here, and I bought the ring with Jenni when we were in Porto.”

I’m completely stunned. I can’t believe it.

- “Was it the day we didn’t shower together?”

She laughs, nodding.

- “Yes, that day.”

We usually took showers together every morning after their morning run. There was just one day she pretended to shower at Jenni’s. She even came back with wet hair. I didn’t question it.

- “I can’t believe it! But why didn’t you propose sooner? And why do you say we weren’t discreet with Mapi?”

- “I wanted to propose after your exam results, to really start our life together.”

I had thought the same, but I couldn’t wait anymore. With Mapi knowing and my own excitement, I was afraid I’d spill the beans before. Alexia advised me to do it as soon as possible, and that’s what I did.

- “As for you and Mapi... Well, because you really weren’t discreet,” she giggles. “Your excuses for getting rid of Ingrid and me for several afternoons were pathetic. I knew something was up. Ingrid even wanted to follow you once to make sure, but I wanted to let you do it your way and be surprised…”

I laugh softly. I admit, the excuse of “we want to make up for lost time” only worked once.

- “I knew I should never have let Mapi handle the excuses. Mine aren’t credible because I can’t lie, but hers are even worse.”

Lucy bursts out laughing. Our tension slowly fades away. We’re still on the ground, but now we’re looking into each other’s eyes with a small, knowing smile. I place my hands on her cheeks.

- “It’s so surreal...” I whisper.

Lucy smiles, leaning a little closer to me.

- “I don’t think so. I love you so much, my love. I’ve wanted to make you mine for a long time. It was the natural next step.”

I kiss her gently. I need to feel her close, and she seems to understand as she presses herself against me.

- “You’re probably right... I love you so much.”

In a peaceful silence, we each slip the rings onto the other’s finger before lying down on the ground. Nothing else matters now. We don’t care if our dresses get dirty. We don’t care about the noise in the distance. The only thing that matters is that we’re together, sprawled out on the ground, entwined, with our hands clasped as if nothing could ever separate us. Smiling, I gaze at the starry sky above, a perfect end to an extraordinary evening. And what a night... We’re now truly inseparable.

#woso #lucy bronze #woso community #ona batlle #barca femeni #woso soccer #lionesses #sefutbol fem #ona batlle x lucy bronze

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christinarowie332 · 1 year ago

Text

too risky ?

chris sturniolo x reader (smut)

who would fold first ? and where ?

warnings: smut , language , public sex . slight pov switching . not proof read !

this is long as fuck i apologize but bare with the plot i swear

massive big fat shoutout to @mattenthusiast @iheart2021chris and @mattsd0ll for giving me the ideas for dis fic . love y’all 🤍

—————

3 days . that is how long it has been since chris and i have fucked . i am by no means a sex addict . but fucking lord i’m loosing my fucking mind .

me and chris along with his brothers decided to all take a last minute vacation to boston ; to stay with their parents. it’s the third day now and out of respect for his family i decided i wasn’t going to have sex with him in his house , i even decided to room with nick instead . we have spent the majority of this time in the house playing board games and making memories , however today we decided to go out for a meal , just the kids , justin included .

we picked a fancy restaurant but still on the more underground type , so as i’m getting ready i have no idea what im going to wear .

“chris ,baby! you can’t wear a fucking beanie!” i tease him , pulling the hat off his head as he walks past me while i’m studying my choices in his closet .

he turns around , watching me throw the beanie on the bed and ruffles his hair back into place , annoyance very openly painted on his face . “y/n , bro , my hair looks stupid i need it” he whines out , while plopping himself down on the edge of the bed , manspreading and adjusting himself and his cargo pants . i turn around , black slip on dress in hand smiling to him as i close the doors of his wardrobe and make my way between his legs .

“you look fine chris , your haircut is perfect , your outfit is perfect , your face is perfect….god your hot….” i say while situating myself standing between his legs , putting my fingers through his hair as his hands snake their way to my bare back , in a bra and shorts . he pulls me in closer , smirk growing on his face as i completely get lost in his features , the harsh above lighting making his cheekbone’s stand out, and his jawline sharper then ever . his half lidded eyes meeting mine , pupils dialated , completely black with need .

“quit being a tease y/n , you’re the one who made the rules.” his voice snaps me out of my trance , letting my hands fall from the back of his neck as i step away from him smiling .

i pull my shorts down so i’m in my underwear, watching myself in the mirror on his closet door , watching him watch me . my ass is fully in his face , a black thong being the only thing covering my body .“pass me my dress please baby” i say as i keep eye contact with him in the mirror , putting my hand out behind me before he places the silky material into my palm . i slip the dress on , the thin straps tickling my shoulders as i slowly pull them to their place , the thin material of my dress carefully falling over my curves. he watches my face in the reflective object as i do this , trying to keep from looking where he shouldn’t .

“can you do me up chris ?” i ask him innocently, referring to the sip resting against my spine . he gets up slowly and walks towards me . still looking in my fucking eyes . break chris .

his cold fingers graze my neck as he moves my hair slowly, i’m sure he can see my blood pumping rapidly in my jugular . the air is thick with tension , allmost suffocating as he slowly moves the zipper up to my neck , the first time his eyes have left mine to carefully pull the fastener up my back : wary to not pinch my skin in the metal. he meets my eyes again and i let out a breath . he puts his hands to my ear from behind me , moving my hair from my neck and moves his lips to the skin . hovering, he moves to my ear .

“I know what your doing baby”

his whisper sends a shock through my body , i inhale quickly, eyes twitching as he looks away and turns around to walk towards his bed . he lies down and puts his back against the head board , a sly smile forming as he puts am arm behind his head before speaking . “you look fucking amazing ma”

this is going to be a long night .

we finally make it to the restaurant, chris’s hand never leaving my waist , from the house , from the car , to the table . his hand only moves when we finally sit down ….to my thigh.

“what do y’all want , i’m craving a MEAN bowl of alfredo rn” nick says diverting my attention from chris’s thumb on my inner thigh , drawing small circles on the soft skin .

“nick your allways getting alfredo , this is no suprise” matt replies from across me .rolling his eyes at his older brother , skimming through the menu before continuing to speak. “imma get some gnocchi i think , the one y/n made the other night seriously changed my life” he says looking at me .

i smile and look at my own menu. “i cant decide between a ceaser salad …. or pesto gnocchi, i love them both i cant-“ i’m interrupted by nick slamming the table . everyone’s eyes on our own table and half the restaurant on him .

“this … y/n is why i love you- have i mentioned that ? because I LOVE YOU !” nick very loudly exclaims from opposite chris , leaning over the table , allmost knocking over our empty wine glasses .

“nick i think your mistaking your love for pesto with y/n , relax” chris replies nonchalantly, his voice emotionless and his face neutral .

we order our food and get lost in conversation, justin ordering the boys their soft drinks , him a jack and coke , me a red wine . our food comes and we all enjoy it , after nicks outburst i ordered pesto gnocchi. of course.

nick matt and justin get lost in a heated debate , the content of this conversation falls on deaf ears to me as i slowly feel chris’s hand move under my dress . his hands tightly placed on my inner thigh .

he moves his hand up towards my core and runs his fingers down the fabric of my underwear , earning a soft and allmost undetected gasp from me . allmost. he hears and moves his middle finger to my clit over my thong , gently running it up and down over the fabric . my hips jerk forward and my legs open subconsciously . my eyes snap to chris’s , silently pleading . his expression never changes , he just removes his gaze from me to his brothers . continuing his movements.

“i have to go to the bathroom.” i announce to the table , the conversation dies down as they all look towards me . i scrape my chair across the floor as i rise from my seat, pulling my skirt down and wiping out the creases.

he watches as i walk away before turning his head towards his brothers , meeting their confused and concerned faces .

“what?” he asks , now matching their expression , jumping from face to face .

“is she good?” justin asks while bringing is cup to his face , taking a sip with furrowed eyebrows .

“yeah is she allright?” matt asks , looking towards the disabled bathroom door .

“oh um , yeah she just isn’t feeling well …. i’ll go see if she’s okay” chris lies through his teeth before getting up and walking towards the bathroom door . his family accepts this and carry on their conversation.

chris knows the door and speaks “hey , it’s chris can i come in?” he asks sweetly . allmost immediately door swings open and i yank him by his shirt inside, i slam the door and lock it , pushing him against it .

his eyes are wide for a second, before they fall and a smirk grows on his lips . “giving up?”

“oh shut the fuck up and fuck me” i say before grabbing his neck and attaching my lips onto his . he allmost immediately reacts, grabbing my face and plunging his tongue into my mouth. he never once breaks the kiss and he walks us both over to the sink , my back hitting the ceramic object harshly , making me gasp allowing him more access to me as he explore my mouth with his tongue, no battle for dominance as his takes over while i place my hand over his dick over his pants. i break the kiss to jump on the sink counter, opening my legs to allow him to situate himself between them. he breaks the distance again , his hands move down from my neck to my hips as i wrap my legs around his waist .

i unbuckle his belt while my lips are on his , he pulls away and glances down at my hand and chuckles to himself at my eagerness .

“we gotta be quiet baby ok ? u sure u want to do this ?”. he asks while unbuttoning his pants and letting them drop to the floor . i nod and he tuts while angling his head . “i said quiet .not silent , use your words”

“yes , please , fuck me chris , please” i breathlessly ramble , nodding my head frantically as i kiss him again . not caring how pathetic i must look as i hurriedly pull down his boxers after breaking the kiss .

i watch as his dick basically springs up from where it was kept , pre cum basically dripping from the tip . seems he was just as eager . he pulls my dress up to my waist and allmost rips my thong from me , placing his hands down to my ass , pulling me to the edge of the sink counter .

he wastes no time slamming into me , a moan slipping from my lips before i slap my hand to my mouth . no preparation needed as i was practically overflowing with my own arousal . days of celibacy taking its tole very evidently . his thrusts start slow , both sensitive allready from days of wanting to be touched.

he relentlessly pounds into me , i have to drop my hand to the cold surface under me to keep me upright , he lets out quiet moans as i grind my hips slightly.

he attaches his lips to mine as he thrusts , to keep both of us from being loud , our lips muffling the whimpers but not the sound of our skin colliding as he shoves into me .

“fuck chris right there ,FUCK!” i allmost scream before realizing where i am and widen my eyes . his dick hitting a certain spot , pleasure filling my body .

“shut the fuck up and take it” he basically growls into my neck after his head collapses onto my shoulders . before removing it and grabbing my face harshly “you look so beautiful right now , look at yourself” he continues, pulling out for a second as he lifts me from the sink , turning my body around and bending me over the edge to look at my self in the mirror .

my hair is plastered onto my forehead with sweat and my cheeks are covered in blush , mascara completely covering my under eyes from squeezing pleasured tears away . i take the sight in before feeling him insert him self into me again , making me let out a moan too loud for his liking. his hand cups around my mouth as he hits from the back , his dick reaching deeper at the change in position.

“fuck i’m so close y/n , fuck , i’m-“ is all i hear as i clench around his cock , moaning into his hand . he cums deep into me as i do , both reaching our highs together .

his hips splutter against me , his chest heaving breaths before he pulls out and removes his hand from my mouth . we take a second to breathe , i lean against the counter before he throws over tissues . i clean myself up as he gets changed and helps me put on my thong .

“we need to start waiting a few days again holy fuck” he speaks as he opens the door to the bathroom and walks out .

i follow him to the table , watching as all three brothers around the table look at me with concern . chris notices my appearance, mascara and sweat still running down my face and speaks up .

“she threw up!”

“CHRIS?”

—————-

needing this rn .

sorry for not posting i have literally been busyyyyy .

love yaa -🍼

taglist:

@mangosrar @azkabanstar @biimpanicking @strniohoeee @soursturniolo @kenzieiskoolaid @kvtie444 @cabincorematt @urmyslxt @mattenthusiast @mattsd0ll @iheart2021chris @parkerssecrets @littlebookworm803 @recklesssturniolo @lovingsturniolo @loveesiren @lustfulslxt @paper-crab @daddyslilchickenfingers @ermdontmindthisaccount @chrattnick @sturnphilia @bluesturniolo333 @lea0518 @chrisolivia4l

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diodellet · 6 months ago

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Top 3 Victims of Getting Whipped by Jamil Viper's Long and Luscious Hair

i wanted to get the gunk from not-writing out before i go back to my pressing wips and i was thinking of how i used to get hit in the face by my friends with long hair…hence these crack hcs. content warnings: -this is crack. this is unserious. (couldn't help myself from hinting at angst. but this entire post is unserious, dw) -unbeta’d, all mistakes are mine. -im okay with this being rb’d and tagged as ship (then in that case this counts as pre-slash if you squint?) word count: 771

3.) Ace Trappola

Nearly took out his eye, those damn braids.

Okay, maybe he's exaggerating. Just a little bit. Then it’s back to business and completing this Alchemy worksheet early!

(Ace is a bit dramatic in that moment, only if it means that he gets to tick off one of his more put-together upperclassmen)

Maybe that’s on him for trying to put on the eager underclassman act (If only to get Jamil to do the brunt of the work for this joint class)

No, he’s not trying to get on Jamil’s good side. Don’t get it twisted. That guy is unbribable. (So Ace thinks, little does he know he’s going about it the wrong way.)

And while one can say that he’s learned his lesson, it doesn’t stop the occasional accident from happening.

And, well, it’s just funny to surprise Jamil. Aside from throwing a fake roach onto his gym bag, that gets boring really fast.

(So Ace says, but he likes to milk the 0.5 seconds of concern. He’s a little brother. It’s an easy way to get some attention drama around here.)

2.) Floyd Leech

Jamil's usually diligent enough to make sure his hair is secured during basketball training. But on a day where Floyd feels like putting in effort…

Well, things get messy. more than the usual amount of chaos that comes with team scrimmages.

And in Jamil’s quick pivot, one thing leads to another, you know.

More than being hurt, Floyd was: Surprised.

And secondly, he notices: Huh, Jamil's hair smells good.

A normal person would ask what products Jamil uses

Floyd’s intrusive thoughts, on the other hand, are like, “yo... what if we took a bite though?”

(0.5 seconds elapsed, we are working in bullet time for those last internal thoughts^^)

And it’s very hard to resist a prospect like that when you also throw in the shininess of Jamil's hair ornaments to the mix.

Cue remix of Beansfest: Hounding Jamil Pt. 2 Electric Boogaloo

(On his low energy days, Floyd doesn’t care. On his bad low-energy days, he’ll yank at the offending braid.)

Either way, Jamil already knows to give Floyd a wide berth on default. That’s why he’s relatively low on this list.

Honorable mention to Azul Ashengrotto

Well, it's only happened twice.

But the guy was changed after those incidents. (Epiphany?? Revelation??)

Maybe the first time he got stunned into silence from getting hit was a fluke, but then it happened again.

And once again, total silence.

(Is Azul supposed to feel appalled? Is this blackmail material? How can he spin this into a surefire conversation to rope Jamil into Octavinelle once and for all? *insert bluescreen noises*)

Jamil’s stopped feeling bad about it when the initial embarrassment wears off.

If Azul gets smacked across the face and loses his glasses, that’s on him. Jamil’s speedwalking away from the crime scene, call that plausible deniability.

Unlike certain people on this list, Azul’s conscientious enough to respect Jamil’s physical boundaries

(For the most part. Sometimes Azul gets too into his “Benevolent Housewarden” persona—it’s the untapped Theater Kid Energy in him—that it could happen a third time.)

1.) (Are we even surprised?)

It's Kalim al-Asim!

When they're at class, when they're going to the school store, even at the safety of the dorm.

(Who knew Kalim had the capacity for stealth when he’s not wearing any of his usual jewelry or accessories? Has Jamil been belling him like a cat?)

It has to happen at least once a day, so decrees the law of the universe

Maybe it’s a consequence of Kalim’s lack of personal boundaries.

(Well, after the events of Book 4, I could say something angsty about that but that can be its own post. This is supposed to be a lighthearted crack scenario)

The worst of it probably had to be during VDC rehearsals. Especially when they were getting the formations down.

Ace has made a tally of each time it has happened, Rook has confirmed the numbers. It cannot be denied any longer, there is Objective Statistical Proof.

Congratulations, Kalim! Here’s a hastily-made certificate of recognition! (Vil would sermon them for goofing off, but he can indulge in some levity. It’s the night before the performance. It’s better than seeing them nervous.)

Kalim’s confused about the makeshift award, but it’s ok, his default response to 97% of things is good-natured laughter.

Jamil on the other hand is done. He wants to sleep. (But, when you compare it with the stress of their initial rehearsals, this kind of situation doesn’t seem so bad. He’ll never admit that out loud though.)

a/n: anyway happy pride jamil, the guy with the most gender, i wudve wanted to give u a harem but my brain said to torment u at ur expense oops (i've had this wip since april, can u believe? omagah) i wasn't sure how to format a post with multiple characters (oh my god icb this is my first twst post that doesn't feature only jamil 🗿🗿) anyway, i hope this was entertaining a read!💕💕

#dellet-writings #twisted wonderland #twst #twst headcanons #twisted wonderland headcanons #twst crack #jamil viper #floyd leech #ace trappola #azul ashengrotto #kalim al asim #could be pre-slash if u wanna read it that way

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equallyshaw · 11 months ago

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star crossed loves au | connor bedard x kailey hughes au ↳ slowly, but surely. ↳ au masterlist!

warnings: angst, anxiety attack, swearing etc. also this takes place in feburary after his jaw fracture! word count: 2.2k. - longer than i expected lol

"do you wanna come to my game?" was a simple question, and one of innocence. kailey would give it that, but the deep feeling of dread was felt rather too quickly for her liking. she looked away from connor as the two were finishing up breakfast, hoping he wouldn't notice the uneasiness that plagued her features. he did. the two had been inseparable since new years, and had became official only a few days afterwards. ofcourse, he'd see the tension that sprang up in her features, the inability to look at him - especially in the eye - and the way that he body seemed to be folding in on itself. she stood up abruptly, bringing the plate back into the kitchen, and connor watched with a million questions buzzing around. she came back in and sat down, swirling her lukewarm coffee. "i um, i cant go." she said staring down the place mat. his eyebrows furrowed, "can't or won't go?" he questioned, hoping for some clarification. she made direct eye contact with him and gave him a small frown, "i wish i could go, i really do. but i can't bring myself to." she said bringing the last of the once hot liquid to her mouth. he shook his head, "you have to tell me what that means kails." he said setting down his fork now.

she sighed, setting the mug down. "i vowed to myself long ago that i'd never go to another hockey game in my life, let alone step into a rink once more." she paused sniffling, "that game ruined my childhood and my relationships with the rest of my family." she said and it felt like a dagger piercing his heart. "then why, why did you agree to be my girlfriend if you can't stand what i do?" he questioned without a second thought, and he could see how much it hurt the blonde. she made a tsk noise, "i can respect and support what you do from afar connor. but y'know now that you say that, why did i say yes? why did i say yes when i knew that i wouldn't be able to listen to the sound of skates hitting the ice when it really mattered? even if it was the stanley cup final, i wouldn't be able to do it because of how much it would make me sick." she finished, standing up and heading towards his condo door. "wait kail-" she cut him off with the front door opening. she stood between the threshold, looking back at connor. "you're right connor, how can i support you when i cant even support my own brothers?" she asked rhetorically before stepping full into the hallway and towards the elevator. as soon as she hit the elevator, she quickly began to cry while hunching over with her eyes shut. connor stood with his mouth agape, unsure if he should go after her or let her go. how could he let her go, when besides hockey- she was the thing he was most sure about in his life?

becca kaileys roommate and longtime best friend, could tell something off that morning when kailey came back to the apartment in a fit of rage. "what'd they do now?" kailey questioned, thinking her brothers said something stupid. "not them, him." she responded beginning to pace. "but its my fault, im the one who said yes without telling him i cant watch hockey. im the one who has wasted his time because why the hell would he date somebody who cant walk into an arena without throwing up?" she blurted as becca stood up, concern lacing her gaze. "hey kails? wanna sit down?" she questioned softly, wrapping her arms gently over her the blonde's. kailey immediately began to break down again, completely folding into becca's figure.

hockey was something that was seldom spoken about in the apartment. it was not off limits per se, but it was to be treaded lightly. unfortunately, kailey held a great amount of disdain for the sport and if it was mixed in with her brothers, it was a double whammy and usually ended in an anxiety attack. sure, she'd been to therapy for her childhood, jack and the topic of of hockey had come up many times. it was the reason why she was plucked away from her budding life in toronto, because they wanted the family to be with jack and usa hockey. it was why everything and everyone that she adored, was taken away from her. so she set up boundaries, and that meant no hockey. besides quinn's debut, no debut for luke or jack. no playoff games, nada nothing. her parents had respected her choice, and with the backing from her therapist - so did the rest of the family. this was something she didn't tell connor when they were talking during break before new years, because she knew that it would scare him away. just like it had now.

kaileys thoughts were interrupted, by a loud knock on their apartment door. "ill be right back." becca announced, standing up and walking towards the door. "ill be in my room." kailey responded, barely audible but becca picked it up. as soon as kailey was out of view, she opened the door to connor. who looked distraught, angry and sad all at the same time. "um hello?" becca said and connor opened the door, pushing his way inside. "where is she?" he asked flustered, and becca sighed. he met becca's gaze and snapped in her face, "becca, where is she?" he repeated and becca stood their in a shocked state. before becca could respond, they both heard a sob or more like a wrenching cry from kailey's bedroom. connor wasted no minute shoving off his shoes and throwing his jacket on becca, before heading down the hallway. becca could only chuckle in response, before sending him a salute as a joke and one that he didn't see. "go get em." she mumbled, before putting his stuff down.

connor knocked on the door before opening it, and as he opened it he found kailey on her bed. her head was in her hands and hunched over. his heart absolutely broke as he walked over, and sat beside kailey pulling her into his body. "its ok kails, I've got you." he whispered, repeating it every few seconds. "im not mad or upset, i promise." he whispered after a few minutes. her sobbing began to quiet down, but her breathing was still too heavy for his liking. "but you were right." she said after about ten minutes. he looked down and shook his head, "i was not right." he stated boldly. she pulled away from his chest, looking at him properly now. "you were right, why should i be your girlfriend if i cant support you on a nightly basis? its not fair to you con, its not." she said running a hand through her hair. "so what?" he questioned, and she looked at him. "so what? you matter more than hockey. yeah we may have only known each other for a month now, but I've never been more sure about somebody or something in my life besides hockey. you and our relationship im so sure about, ask any of the guys. they probably would tell you that im so disgustingly annoying." he mused causing her to giggle softly. "i promise that just because you choose not to watch hockey, doesn't mean that im gonna break up with you." he argued and she chuckled. "you don't like me enough to say and do that." she said rolling her eyes, and he shook his head. "no, i love you that's why." he confessed and she slowly looked back towards him. "wait...what?" she asked, barely breathing. he grinned before smiling, "i love you kailey clara and what are you gonna do about that?" he mused causing her to blush. she breathed in heavily why playfully rolling her eyes, "i can either kick you out or tell you that i love you back." she hummed, leaning closer towards him. "thankfully for you, its the latter." she hummed staring down his lips before pulling him in for a passionate and deep kiss.

the two pulled away after about ten seconds, pressing their foreheads against one another's. "as long as you say you're my number one fan we'll be good. this cements everything." he joked causing her to giggle. "you cheeky boy! but yes, good thing ill be your number one fan as long as you have me." she grinned before they kissed once more.

later on in the afternoon as the two cuddled with one another after connor's nose found solace in kaileys neck, the blonde spoke up. "i promise connor, to open myself up to hockey. i promise im going to try, ok?" she questioned turning around to face him. he had a small hopeful smile grace his features, "slowly but surely kails." he hummed before pulling her into his chest and placing a kiss on her head.

it was two weeks later, and after a black graphic t-shirt of connor came in- her and becca were off to a game against the florida panthers. the two walked arm and arm towards the 300's section wanting to experience it in the 'trenches' kailey had always called them, and experience it with some die hard fans. and, far enough away that nobody on the team or their partners would recognize her. she wanted to surprise connor.

"i feel like i could vomit." she confessed, sitting next to becca who only gave her an encouraging smile. "the game's underway, maybe that'll distract?" she questioned and kailey could only laugh in response. the two's attention focused on the game, and some point during it she had sent a text to not only tessa, alex vlasics girlfriend but her mom as well, sealing it with a picture of her view. her mom and dad gushed and sent words of encouragement and tessa begged for her to meet them after the game in the wags and family box. to which kailey responded, was a tba. the blackhawks ended up wining 3-1 with connor getting a goal and two assists. and with being on somewhat of a high, she told tessa that they would meet her in the 200's section. tessa stood their waiting for them and as soon as she saw them, she began to jump up and down with excitement. "im so happy you're here!!!" tessa gushed, pulling kailey in for a huge hug. she then moved towards becca and the two of them hyped the youngest hughes up. "oh my god, stopppp." she said blushing. "can you not, were in public you two." as the two girls highfived each other. "what?! this is a big deal girlfriend. you made it through the entire game." becca said shaking the girl just a bit. tessa's phone dinged with a text from alex, him and connor were walking towards the box now.

"get your ass in there, now." tessa demand pointing back towards the box door and becca quicky pulled her inside. becca smiled and waved to some of the girl's she had met at new years with kailey, and they were all happy to see kailey. finally. "im nervous beccs." kailey said in a whisper and becca smiled, "he'll be happy to see you chica." she smiled down at her best friend who only nodded.

kailey heard his voice before she saw him, and once becca looked behind her she turned around. connor hadn't taken notice yet but once tessa made a nonchalant comment, he quickly looked around the now - desolate- room and then his eyes landed on her. she smiled softly, once their eyes connected. he smiled, and then made his way over ot the girl. he pulled her in for a big hug without a word, his nose finding the crook of her neck. "hi pretty girl." he whispered, and she found herself blushing like a fool. "hey superstar." she grinned, before he pulled back a bit to look at her. then he noticed the t-shirt and he smiled, taking a step back to inspect it. "oh, i brought it just for this occasion." she grinned making him chuckle just a bit. "its my face." he said a bit stunned, "it is your face." becca said monotoned which made kailey snicker. "its alright, he's got a pretty face." she teased, "a pretty face, huh?" they heard Phillip kurashev tease and that made connor roll his eyes. "pretty pretty connor!" kevin joined in causing more chuckles to arise, "lets go pretty boy!" mackenzie entwistle teased, and kailey smiled softly.

"come on pretty boy." she teased, beginning to walk out with everybody else. "i should put that as your new name in my phone." becca mused, typing away on her phone. "i swear to god becca if you do!" connor threatened playfully, "you'll what?" she grinned back. "ill tell your little secret..." connor began only for becca to hear and that made becca grow quiet. "you wouldn't dare,🖕🏻" she texted and connor only giggled in response as they walked towards connor car.

so what secret, connor baby? lmao

please like and reblog if you liked!

#connor bedard #connor bedard x k hughes au #start crossed lovers au #connor bedard au #connor bedard blurb #connor bedard imagine #jack hughes #quinn hughes #chicago blackhawks #new jersey devils #luke hughes #vancouver canucks #equallyshaw masterlist #nhl #hockey #nhl blurb #nhl imagine #hockey blurb #hockey imagine

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