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ravenstargames · 1 year ago

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✦ Lost in Limbo 2023 wrap-up

And finally, after the hectic period of Christmas and the New Year, we are here and ready for our wrap-up!

Warning: this devlog may include some typos. As per usual!

Honestly, I can't believe we are here. This year has been wild for so many reasons. We have made so much progress, perhaps not as much as we would have wanted, but we have come really far. I'm very proud of my team and thankful for the people we have met this year that have made this journey easier.

So...let's see what we have done this year and our plans for 2024!

✦ First of all, we made our itch.io page debut!

And this was perhaps the hugest milestone for us. It got a wonderful reception even if there's nothing to play yet, so we can't be grateful enough for that. This of course includes the key art and the screenshots we managed to get ready for the itchio page!

✦ We launched our official webpage!

Another amazing milestone for us! I remember tirelessly working with Raquel for weeks to get this done the way we wanted it to be.

✦ We welcomed our editor, Allie Vera, to our team!

They are not only a marvelous person but someone I'm having the privilege to learn from. Her editing skills are amazing and the script has done nothing but improve since we got it in her hands. We have started editing together and she has been working so, so hard, I'll be doing my best to keep up. Please send a lot of love their way, because they deserve it!

✦ We began working on the CGs!

Raquel has been working super hard and right now we have five CGs ready and one in process. The last one will likely be ready for next month, and with that the CGs for the demo will be finished!

✦ The UI was implemented and it's fully functional!

For someone who was a total stranger to programming, I think I've done a good job this past year! The game menus finally look like they should (with a bit of changes needed here and there) and everything is working well. I'm sure the code could be optimized greatly, but for now I'm happy with how it is (as my skills are, well, what they are!).

✦ We finished the demo script and have started the editing process!

That was a huge step for us as many changes were done to the script before we could consider it done. We sadly had to cut chunks of content because we felt like, for a demo, it was better to get to the juicy parts and meet the LI's as soon as possible. Some adaptations had to be made, some ideas had to be scratched, but here we are now, with a finished script ready to be coded, and being edited by Allie!

✦ We got some nice backgrounds done!

Work on backgrounds has been slower than we would have wanted to, but taking into consideration we were studying a master (that was pretty hard on us) and there's only four of us, I'd say it's a victory! There's still some backgrounds left, but as Astro and Raquel work on that, there's other areas of the game that keep moving forward.

✦ We opened a ko.fi page!

This was one of our 2023 goals, so high-five!

✦ We met amazing people, made new friends, and learned from a lot of fellow devs!

What a ride has it been! People I used to admire from a distance, enjoying their projects and gushing over them, are now part of my personal life. A lot of fellow devs have come forward in 2023 with new projects, new inspiring and incredible ideas, and we have been supported by all of them and welcomed as if we had always been a part of the Indie visual novel community.

Just to name a few of inspiring and amazing devs, the sweet folks at Foxglove Games (who have released Trouble Comes Twice!), Velvet Cupcake Games and their progress with Made Marion, Best Laid Plain Productions and their amazing work with Save the Villainness, and of course our beloved Crescence Studio with Alaris and Intertwine, which now has an Extended Edition!

As per usual, Lem (Crescence) has a special spot in this devlog because they have been the absolute highlight of this year. What a loving, sweet, amazing and creative individual. We all are very lucky to have them with us, but specially me; their friendship has meant so much for me this year, and I hope we can only grow closer with time! I LOVE YOU LEM!! 💜

✦ On a personal note...

On the personal side of things, I got diagnosed with OCD in late November. I had been suffering the symptoms since July, knowing something was wrong but thinking it would pass. It has changed my life and the way I see things and myself, and I'm on a long journey that has, unfortunately, affected my work on Lost in Limbo. I have not worked as much as I had planned, but I'm lucky to have my friends, my family and my partner, who are walking this path with me.

I'm sharing this because I think it's important. My experience will hopefully give someone who is reading this the push to seek help; I thought it was nothing and I ended up going through the hardest year of my life. Thankfully, I now have the help I need; I have been going to therapy since October, been diagnosed, and I'm now on my way to learn to live with OCD and heal from it. Some days are harder than others, but I'll get there! 💜

On a happier note, Astro and I will be adopting a cat from a shelter very very soon, if things go as planned! Raquel has taken the plunge and opened a sticker store! She has been doing great so far and is overworked but happy. We are so proud of her!

Also, we finally, FINALLY had the chance to get together for New Year's Eve and celebrate together after more than seven years of friendship! Sadly Kayden couldn't make it in the end because of COVID, but hopefully this is the beginning of a lot of years of celebrating together!

Mostly, the team and I have been doing fine, all things considered. Astro wants you all to now that even if he's not very active on social media, he appreciates your support a lot and will do his best to return that love! Thank you all for your support through the year, as always 💜

We had a bunch of goals set for 2023, and my God if they weren't ambitious. This year has taught us a lot about limits, about being realistic with our expectations and with the amount of work needed for a visual novel, and has overall humbled us.

There's one sprite remaining, the LI's expressions, plus one CG and finishing the backgrounds that need a bit more polishing. That and editing the script into its final state and code it accordingly.

With that being said, I want to be positive and say the demo may be ready for April - May, but I don't know if that'll be possible. We made the mistake of being too excited and too positive when it came to the work we would be able to do, and we apologize for that. We are still learning and we hope you can still support us and make this journey with us as you have been doing since we started.

Still, the demo WILL release this year. That is for sure. As we keep working —and the team has been working very, very hard— we'll decide when the demo will release, giving it time to be beta tested, sent to streamers who are interested, etc.

So the main objective of this year is...

✦ Release the demo!

Obvious, right? But with it comes some smaller goals!

✦ Code the script!

The editing process is going well —thanks to Allie who works tirelessly, honestly— so I hope I can step on the gas and get those corrections done as soon as possible!

✦ Finish all the assets!

As soon as Raquel is done with the CGs, we'll start working on the expressions together (I have already been toying with it) and the remaining sprite. Astro will finish the remaining backgrounds!

✦ Open a casting call for our LIs!

We want the demo to be at least partially voiced. When the whole script is done and more or less coded, we'll open a casting call to give our LIs what will be their official voices for the whole game. What an adventure!

✦ Open our steam page!

Pretty self-explanatory, but there it is!

What a year, huh? We have worked so much and so hard while studying, and that studies are now over. This year has been one of self-discovery, of new challenges, of some goodbyes and some new faces and friends. My only wish for 2024 is for it to be gentler to everyone. Hopefully we can all heal from whatever hurt us in 2023, laugh a lot with our loved ones, and learn more about ourselves and our lives in this 2024! 💜

With that being said, thank you for reading once more, and let us hope this year brings us a lot of amazing games and memories! 💜

#lost in limbo #visual novel #otome #indiedev #devlog

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fanfictilltheend · 2 years ago

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A Trick of the Winter Light (Joel Miller/You)

AO3 Link

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A/n: To fill the anon tumblr prompt: "I have a Joel x daddy issues!reader request!! Reader sees how good Joel is with Ellie, and it makes her happy and sad at the same time. She's happy Ellie gets to have an amazing father, but she can't stop thinking about what was wrong with herself that her father couldn't love her the way Joel loves Ellie. This causes a bit of trouble in their little family until Joel and ellie confront reader about why she's being distant. I'd like a happy ending where joel comforts reader too!!!"

Warnings: fluff, hurt/comfort, past abusive father mention, daddy issues, referenced past domestic violence, sarah mention, please take care of yourself!!

Summary: Reader comes from an abusive home and seeing Joel and Ellie's good relationship is heartwarming but also confusing at times. When Joel and Ellie get in a snowball fight reader assumes the worst between the two of them and Joel and Ellie comfort you the best way they know how.

Your dad was an asshole. There was no other way of saying it. You can’t even count the number of times that fucker came after you with a belt. This wasn’t the worst of it though, you think. The worst was that that motherfucker basically ignored you your entire childhood except to criticize or beat you. No playing dolls, no showing up to soccer games, no high-fives if you managed to scrape up an A on your report card. Instead, radio silence except for the slamming of fists or the shouting of harsh words.

To say this didn’t fuck you up would be a lie. But it didn’t just fuck up how you felt about yourself, that could have filled up a novel, no, it also fucked up how you perceived other people’s relationships. And that’s where Joel and Ellie came in.

When Joel and Ellie moved into Jackson it turned your life upside down in the best possible way. You were an assistant teacher in the Jackson high school and met Ellie first. She charmed her way into her heart and that dark and mysterious Joel Miller was soon to follow with prompting from Ellie. Joel had initially been cold to you as he was to everyone (maybe that’s what drew you to him – another emotionally unavailable older man who actively didn’t give a shit about you), but he warmed up to you quickly when he saw how awesome you could be with Ellie. The rest was history and you moved in with Joel and Ellie soon after.

Most days were amazing! You were so impressed with the way Joel fathered Ellie, always being so kind and considerate to her and the way he looked at her like the sun shone out of her ass always melted your heart. But it was a lot to get used to, seeing a real, mostly-functional father-daughter relationship that you just never had. And then sometimes you were transported into the past against your will.

Take today, for example. It was winter and snow covered Jackson like a Christmas card. School had been canceled for you and Ellie and a construction project Joel had been helping with became a snow hazard so he had off too. You and Joel had been reading contentedly on the couch until Ellie raced inside and threw a live snowball right into Joel’s chest. You died laughing until Joel got up and declared war on Ellie who raced back outside, giggling hysterically. You and Joel grabbed coats and gloves and ran out into the front yard and began lobbing snowballs at Ellie who was screaming with glee from behind a snowbank. Everything was fine until Ellie managed to hit Joel square in the face. Joel stopped what he was doing, wiped the melting snow off his face gruffly, got up from the embankment you two had hidden behind, and marched over to Ellie. Ellie’s eyes widened in fear and she ducked down behind her snowbank. In seconds, Joel was upon her and tackled her to the ground behind the large pile of snow and you simply lost it. You didn’t think Joel would ever be capable of hurting Ellie, but you had seen that ferocious look in his eye – that same look you’d seen in your father’s.

“Joel!” you yelled urgently, running over. “Get the fuck off of her! How the fuck could you–”

But you cut yourself off the second you realized the two were just laughing, rolling around, and play-fighting in the freezing snow.

Oh, I am an idiot . You thought to yourself, wiping away the tears that had somehow collected in your eyes.

“Chill out, Y/N–” Ellie giggled, turning over to face you. “Oh my god. Shit. Are you crying!? We were just messing around…” she trailed off, looking over at Joel with worry.

Joel was looking up at you now with concern too. He knew about your past, but you didn’t blame him for not connecting the convoluted dots.

“Shit, darlin’,” he said gently. “Don’t cry. What’s the matter now?”

“I-I-thought–” you began, but suddenly you were crying. You were always a crier. Every time your dad hurt you verbally or physically, you always cried. Like clockwork. “Thought you were m-mad at Ellie. I-I’m so sorry,” you sobbed pathetically, wiping the tears from your eyes.

Ellie looked up at you again with worry. Then she put two and two together. (Always was a smart kid).

“You…you thought he was really gonna hurt me?” She asked, looking up at Joel from her spot on the ground.

“Kinda,” you nodded, staring down at the snow-drenched earth.

“Joel’d never ever hurt me like that, Y/N,” Ellie said, getting up and taking your hand. “Don’t you know that?”

“Yeah, is the thing,” you replied, looking over into Joel’s eyes. “I know he never, ever would. You’re so lucky to have that, Ellie. I just knew some people who weren’t like that is all. And I sometimes forget how good people can be.”

Joel stood up too and put a large hand on your shoulder.

“Over my dead body, I’d ever hurt either one of you,” he said meaningfully, looking into your eyes and you knew he was telling the truth.

And because of that, you burst into tears.

“Ellie, kiddo, why don’t you go over to Dina’s for a little?” Joel suggested gently.

Ellie gave you a kind of awkward side hug and nodded and made her way over to Dina’s house, looking back a little uneasily.

Joel mouthed something to her, but you couldn’t tell what because tears had flooded your vision.

“Hey, I dunno who you’re talking about, Y/N,” Ellie shouted from half-way down the block, cupping her mittens around her mouth. “About those asshole people. But I’ll kick their asses for you!”

“Thanks, Els!” you giggled through the tears. She was always looking out for you like that even though she was only fourteen. “You’re a good kid.”

And with that, Ellie disappeared into town with a last nod.

“Uh, why don’t we head on inside and have something hot to drink,” Joel suggested.

You nodded your head and Joel took your hand so gently, which was so different than how you’d seen him handle a weapon on patrol that your heart broke a little more, unsure how you got lucky enough to find someone who handled you so tenderly.

***

You both sat at the kitchen counter with two steaming mugs of hot chocolate as the sun got lower in the winter sky.

“Gonna tell me what that was all about?” Joel asked, putting his hand on yours.

“It’s so fucking stupid,” you replied, taking your hand away.

Joel frowned.

“Not to me it ain’t,” he responded seriously, his brown eyes meeting yours. “Nothing you say is stupid. Hell, half the time I’ve gotta look up words you just slip into normal conversation.”

You grinned at that. This was Joel after all. You knew you could tell him pretty much anything and he wouldn’t judge you, had probably done fifty times worse.

“You just…had this angry look in your eye when Ellie threw that snowball at you. It reminded me of how my dad used to look at me before he’d…get physical. In my mind, I know you would never, ever hurt Ellie. But it’s like my body hasn’t caught up to my thoughts and it’s still a little girl, living at home with a terrifying asshole.”

“I get that,” Joel said after a moment.

“You do?”

“Sure. Sometimes…sometimes my body still feels like it’s holding Sarah the day I lost her even though it’s been twenty years.”

Joel rarely mentioned Sarah so you were honored he felt comfortable enough to bring her up. You put your hand back on his and rubbed his calloused skin tenderly.

“Never’d hurt you or Ellie though. Over my dead body, alright?” Joel continued meaningfully, reaching out a large hand to rub your back. “But your dad? That asshole? Like Ellie said, I’d kick his ass six ways to Sunday.”

You snort into Joel’s flannel-covered shoulder, trying to imagine it. Joel would rip that asshole limb from limb with his bare hands, you were sure of it. You’d heard stories of what he was capable of, had seen glimpses of it on patrols. Ellie would be more than happy to assist. Come to think of it, maybe you’d get a kick or punch in edgewise of your own.

“Can I tell you something?” you asked slowly, your foot tangling with his own.

“‘Course, doll,” He replied with a kind smile.

“This may not mean a lot coming from me, seeing as I don’t know much better, but I really do think you’re an amazing father.”

“To me, angel, that means the world,” Joel told you with a genuine grin.

He leaned over and kissed you on the top of your forehead and then between your lips. You kissed him back lovingly.

“Your dad didn’t know what the fuck he was missing with someone like you,” Joel murmured low against your ear.

You grinned.

“Love you, Joel,” you told him, pulling him in for a hug.

“Love you too, babygirl. Never gonna let anyone lay a finger on you ever again.”

A/n: Any feedback would be much appreciated! Lmk prompts or suggestions or if you would like to be tagged! Thanks for reading!! ❤️

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crowns-of-violets-and-roses · 8 months ago

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Do you have any good sci-fi recs? I haven't read anything written in the last decade except Murderbot I think.

Oh I have so many. I'll skip the series and books that have been deluged with big American SF awards (although Embassytown, the Teixcalaan duology, The Broken Earth trilogy, and The Locked Tomb series are all more than worth a read to name a few) and list a few other things here that have been published in the last decade or so that I loved.

Ada Palmer's Terra Ignota series is amazing. Set in the 25th century where nation states have been replaced by voluntarily joined polities called Hives. The books are framed as a history (the author herself is a historian as a day job) written by an infamous criminal aping the style of the eighteenth century. Lots of fun and a deeply ambitious set of books. They sometimes stumble and fail to realise their ambition but still a great series.

Deep Wheel Orcadia is a verse novel written in the Orcadian dialect of Scots by Harry Josephine Giles. English translations are provided but I found it best read by reading each section in the Orcaidan first and then the English after. Depending on your dialect of English you may often be able to understand a lot of what's happening before moving into the English translation. It follows an artist Astrid returning to her home and an heiress Darling who has run away from her life. They both come to the space station Orcadia and the novel focuses on them and the ordinary people of the station. There's lines of it still lodged in my mind years after reading it.

In Children of Time by Adrian Tchaikovsky a runaway project to terraform a planet and accelerate evolution leads to the inadvertent creation of sentient spiders. It focuses on the development of the spider society, a generation ship of humans and eventually the two of them meeting. A great work of xenofiction. It has two sequels - I've read and enjoyed one and have heard good things about the other - but was originally a standalone and can be read as such.

It wasn't published in the last ten years but Yōko Ogawa's The Memory Police was only translated into English in 2019 so I'm including it here. Set on an island where people periodically forget about different objects and concept and they're removal is then enforced by the titular Memory Police. I'm generally suspicious of literary authors writing SF (I often find it's worse than their usual writing and not good SF) but this book is brilliant and the best I've read by Ogawa.

Isabel J. Kim is one of the best SF short story writers currently writing. While she's best known on tumblr for Why Don't We Just Kill the Kid In the Omelas Hole many of her other stories are better than it. For sci-fi specifically Zeta-Epsilon is a good intro to her work. If you're into SF and fantasy her entire bibliography is worth reading and is nearly all available for free online.

Ted Chiang had a new short story collection Exhalation released in 2019. Chiang is always thought provoking and unlike many SF authors focused on exploring the implications of an idea or concept he knows how to imbue human emotion into his work. The story the collection takes it's title from is available online and is one of my favorites by him if you're looking to get a sense of his work.

Porpentine is best known for her brilliant interactive fiction (IF) . She has a very distinct voice and it should be noted her work is often extremely dark. Usually I'd recommend With Those We Love Alive as an intro to her IF but it's more fantasy than SF, Howling Dogs might be a better entry point if you're into SF specifically and if you're interested in her work she has a collection Eczema Angel Orifice which collects much of her early work. She's also written more experimental work like Foldscape a game made exclusively of folders.

If you aren't into IF Mall school was an early "rare venture into linear storytelling" that I'm fond of. She's written more linear writing in recent years and has released a bunch of short stories, novellas and an amazing novel Serious Weakness (though other than being set five minutes in the future there aren't many SF elements in it).

#misc reading

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tvkorn · 9 months ago

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Intro<3

HI:3 im ilovekorn from ao3. Me and ihearttvgirl have been working on a fanfic for a while and we felt like we should make a blog to promote and make some extra content for it! Currently, our main fanfic is “the prince she was interested in wasn’t a prince at all” which is a fantasy/royalty/medieval au version of “the guy she was interested in wasn’t a guy at all” and we will explain more about it below!!

“The prince” isn’t our only fanfic though! We also have a Style fanfic inspired by “Harvey” by Alex G. Please check it out, we appreciate it so much!!! It’s about Stan moving away for college, abandoning his friends and his past. He has to come back to south park after a bad injury and he meets Kyle again. We love to write angst lool

On a different note, we plan on using this account to post art for our fanfic along with updates on other fanfic ideas we’ve had. Maybe we’ll post some sneak peaks? hehe

hello!! i’m i_heart_tvgirl from ao3 ^^ I’ve loved “the guy she was interested in wasnt a guy at all” and writing things for like forever, but I’ve always been WAY too scared to post things online… like I only got an ao3 account midway through this project LOL!! This whole thing was actually kind of a spur of the moment thing for me.

I realized one random day in the spring that the manga might’ve had fanfics before sprinting to ao3 to read them. I was totes amazed by all the great writers for this fandom (if any of you are reading this, chances are I’ve probably read your work ;D ) but also shocked by how little content there was. After reading this cute fantasy oneshot by another writer in the fandom, I texted korn and was like “I really wanna make a crazy long medieval au pls”.

I’d always wanted to be one of those crazy worldbuilding writers with fanfics twice the size of a novel, but I resigned myself to observing instead of posting… BUT KORN CHANGED THAT!! They were like “yeah that sounds fire” and we started bouncing off these big ideas. Our one shared conclusion? We were going to make things super angsty. JK LOL

This fanfiction is heavily into the building up of this fantasy world. I made a map out of rice and we worked from there. Korn and I have this giant worldbuilding document full of information, which I hope can be partially shown in these blogs, where we just went on and on. Every single country has its origins, its customs, and relations with other nations. Looking at the map, it’s obvious that some countries haven’t been explored in the fanfiction quite yet. Its not from a lack of information (trust us, we have a LOT) but more so that we are taking our time with the story’s progression.

We plan to have around 50 total chapters to tell this story, but we will sit down sometime and make sure we have the correct amount to tell the story without rushing :D there is still much to come in our tale.

On a final note, please ask us questions! The more you want to know the more we can tell you about the story and all that ^^ thank you for sticking around with our giant fanfic, and we hope you’ll support us with our future projects <3

xoxo tv girl

#the guy she was interested in wasn't a guy at all #fanfic #koga mitsuki #aya oosawa #style #south park #mitsuaya #alex g #kyle broflovski #stan marsh

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pretentiousliterata · 5 months ago

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A Letter From Me to You

~Closer to the end, lessons yet to learn…~

I’m still amazed at the fact we’ve reached the end of September… is it only me or this year is passing by so fast? Naturally, the anxiety to get things done ASAP hits and it’s overwhelming. Learning to slow down it’s the actual challenge.

Hello there, your friendly neighbor Ali here. Welcome to my “newsletter” where I share my shenanigans as I try to get back on track to polish the third draft of my current work in progress: a little dark fantasy novel I have temporarily named “On the Night Transcending the Raging Light”. And well, some other stuff… we keep it real here, so, don’t get surprised if you don’t read super positive stuff (but we keep hopes up, so it’s not all negative…)

I would love to say badly I have been writing non-stop and making my way smoothly through the third draft, but then I would be lying. And no, it’s not like I’ve been slacking (just like I did with this month’s Unite and Fight, sorry fellow crew members!), but one of the things I’ve come to accept is life keeps throwing stones and while it’s not funny, it’s you and you alone who decides if that will stop you from going where you want to go. And while times can be slow, lessons keep coming and learning never ends, even if it’s not as sweet or fulfilling as we would like to.

While the writing has been going slowly, after a mind-opening conversation, I got the courage to start sharing my work out there and ask for feedback beyond the lovely friends who always read my stories before they go out there. In exchange, I have read stories of amazing upcoming writers and enjoying seeing how others are also creating their worlds and how we’re all in this journey, both amazed and scared of what’s ahead. Some of the feedback I got was lovely, I’m really thankful because it boosted my confidence in this project. Some of the feedback was harsh, and I don’t mean it in a bad way, it was actually eye opening. Again, so much to learn even when you think you know most everything.

This month I also received my fourth rejection of the year, the first one for my current work in progress. I submitted “On the Night…” to a literary contest and it didn’t make the cut. I won’t lie, it hits the ego. However, when I think about it, the submission was the second draft (it was a while ago) and the story has significantly changed since then. I’m coming closer to the story I wanted to narrate and show and while it destroyed a bit the confidence (especially because the announcement was on a thursday, the day I save for the writing session Taika Editorial hosts, no matter what happens, and since I started the book, it became a ritual), the fire is still alive and it makes me truly happy this project is not giving up at all —even the universe seems to favor this as it keeps sending a very specific sign (I won’t say what it is) whenever I think “it’s over”. I’m one to run away when things go south or if they don’t work, a heavy reason why I wasn’t able to finish a single novel despite me having the dream of doing so. To keep going forward with it makes me hopeful, not for the sake of fame or having a big name, but because it shows I’m changing too.

Change is one of the biggest fears I face constantly, and while I haven’t let go of some bad habits, as they return when the mood is low, I can see how I’m heading towards the true change, one which I hope will give me a reason to fight and cling to life to enjoy the journey and not only to move forward because existing is something I’m forced to do.

I can’t say September has been all good changes and good vibes. There have been situations which opened some wounds I believed were closed but they’re just temporarily healed for the sake of being forgotten and not addressing the issues. I won’t get into deep detail about this, but as one of my favorite songs of all time says, “I’m sick and tired of being afraid, if I cry any more then my tears will wash me away”. I don’t want to keep crying about what could have been or try to fix what’s undeniably broken, it’s not worth the try anymore.

One of the things I’m thankful about writing is how it becomes my voice when I’m unable to speak my heart. These past days I’ve shared some “poems” (I wouldn’t call them exactly that, yours truly is barely well versed in fiction, poetry is still far away from reach), the train of thoughts of rage and despair that come in those moments when I don’t want to cry and just simply let words express how I feel. Cathartic writing has always been helpful to me. Not that I want to brag about it, but funnily enough, last year I got an award for that… so, I guess writing my emotions as they come is not that bad hehe…

So, at the end of September, as we’re ready to enter the last three months of the year of the unexpected, all I can say is don’t let the stepping stones in the way stop you to go where you want to. The biggest one is us and us alone and while you can count on amazing friends or strangers on the internet to hear you, the only one who can decide to move forward is you. Keep writing, keep creating, keep taking care of you. I’m not the best at following my own advice, but hey, slowly but steadily, lessons are never ending…

Let’s see what’s in store for October. Luckily, if things go as the beginning of the month, I will be able to finish with the rewritings for this third draft and full speed ahead to edit and change the storylines that will be affected with the current changes that have come across. And, hopefully, I also have the courage to finally share something more than just the long temporary name of this project with all. The screenwriter/director Ali season is also coming, so I’m worried about how to balance these things, but let’s take one step at a time…

Until next time, folks! x

P.S: Given last month I showed the song that represented my August, here’s a little top three of songs for September in no particular order:

#a letter from me to you #ali writes stuff #writers on tumblr #writers life #tales of a tortured writer #writeblr #female writers #writing community #writer struggles

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tairona-is-taken · 2 years ago

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Thanks so much for the tag, @pursuitseternal! I, too, had to dig into the archives for this, haha (although sadly, I have written zero Tolkien fics, so these are all from other projects/fandoms).

Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. If you have written less than ten, don’t be shy and share anyway ❤️

1. The last house on the island had not sunk yet after all, though the waters of the bay stretched in all directions from its stone foundation to the distant horizon, glittering like crinkled tin foil in the afternoon sunlight. (Original fantasy novel)

Next up, all my Star Wars fics on AO3:

2. The comm came through just as Vader entered the moon’s atmosphere, a red blinking light indicating that it was of the highest priority. (The Boy Who Lived)

3. As soon as her last debriefing with NR Intelligence was over, Mara hurried to her temporary quarters in the Imperial Palace, threw her bag on the carved four-poster bed and started packing. (Killing You Softly)

4. Beru would always remember the first time she saw Darth Vader. (Worthy of Love)

5. Luke hasn’t thought of Old Ben in ages, but one morning he wakes up and just knows he has to go see him. (I'm Here to Rescue You)

6. “Son, how much longer are you going to waste your time on these pointless language lessons?” (Beyond Measure)

7. It started innocently enough, with Solo and Skywalker trading stories about stupid things they’d done while drunk. (What Happens on Hoth)

And now we've got to start digging into my DCU Livejournal fanfic from 15 years ago O_o ...

8. "All right, boys, come and get it," Lois grumbled as she set a cardboard tray holding four cups of coffee down on her desk. (A Lead)

9. On hands and knees in the ruined Fortress, with fingers beginning to blacken from frostbite, Clark claws at the snow, scrabbling to pick up the green Father Crystal from where it lies. (The Memento)

10. 6:00 PM. It was already 6:00 PM, Bruce realized with a start, and he had only finished reviewing the first unit of his fluid mechanics class. (In Arms of Undertow)

Anyway, what a fun trip down memory lane! And I was amazed that I managed to pull together this list without including any of my oldest fics (from Howl's Moving Castle fandom). I've written more than I thought over the course of my extremely sporadic fandom career!

As usual, I'm late to the game and nearly everyone's already been tagged, but here are a couple no pressure tags for folks I think haven't joined in yet :) -- @hikarielizabethbloom, @haladriel, @greenskyoverbluemountains

And anyone else who hasn't been tagged and wants to play, feel free to jump in!

#tag game #my fanfic #my original fic #writing

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egcdeath · 8 months ago

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succession anon has me thinking about patrick in house of the dragon…but while i think about that, i think patrick in big little lies would be everything

like his family is rich so it makes perfect sense for him to be living in a place like Monterey. like maybe you’re a writer (or something else artistic) and you’re married to Patrick with one daughter. you guys moved there after he retired because you knew it would be a good community for your daughter and he likes the beach and you think the calm area will help you write. you’re a fairly happy couple with your own struggles but the joint passion and support for each other has really prevented any major problems from happening

maybe when jane moves there with ziggy, it’s your daughter who keeps getting hurt (changing the plot a bit to make you more major) so naturally you and patrick get involved in everything

i have more thoughts on this but i wanna test the waters first….your thoughts neptune?

- 🫀

oh heart anon YOUR MIND!!! also. never hold back with your thoughts to me. you always put such amazing thoughts into your brain you never need to test the waters with me 🫂

i haven’t watched hotd yet (i probably will once all of s2 comes back) but once i do im sure ill have more thoughts on that!

patrick does fit PERFECTLY into big little lies. i love the situation you laid out with reader and patrick moving to monterey after he retires. maybe you’ve done one pretty big novel or other artistic project and you’re pretty creatively constipated but you think that now that your daughter’s a little older (like around the same age as the other kids in bll) and that patrick’s not constantly on the move you’ll be able to focus and write the sequel to your first work.

i do think that both of you underestimate the neighborhood politics and the characters in monterey. like those people are CRAZY and yes you and patrick have been around rich wild people before but they’re kinda a different breed.i do feel like eventually that might take a toll on your relationship buttt i’m curious to see what you think 🫀 anon…

i also think the pairing being in a situation where their child is the one being bullied would also put them in a pretty sticky place. maybe they both feel a little differently about what the best course of action should be for their kid and that puts a lot of strain on them as well 👀

so many thoughts 🫀 anon but i want to hear all of yours!!! dump it on me!!!

#neptune answers #🫀 anon

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barnesafterglow · 3 years ago

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all you need (1)

summary: just after finishing college and your first novel, you meet bucky barnes - a friend of a friend, a publisher, and hopefully something more

pairing: publisher!bucky x author!reader

word count: 2k

chapter warnings: language, alcohol consumption, sexual thoughts, roommate fluff

a/n: hi uh. first chapter :) this is really short, more of a prologue than a first chapter, but i'm super excited to share this with you all!! feedback is always appreciated, i have so much love for this and all of you! and so many thanks to @pellucid-constellations and @sweetdreamsbuck, i couldn't have done this without y'all's constant encouragement <3

join my taglist!

The heavy scent of black tea calmed your nerves as you sank into your seat at the very back of the library. You were starting to get jittery from the stress and the thought of shaky hands ruining your work only added to it.

Spread before you was your life’s work - well, your last six years of work. Starting as a freshman, you had a professor who pushed you so fiercely that she ended up becoming your academic advisor through graduate school. Even at 18, she recognized your talent and determination, and challenged you to start a project you had never even dreamed you would finish: your very first novel. The study room table was a chaos of rough drafts and storylines and everything else you had accumulated in these last years. It was beautiful and terrifying and filled you so full of emotion you had to just close your eyes and relax for a moment.

So there you were, staring at everything you had ever worked for, getting ready to pack it up and take your very final draft - and the end of your academic career - to Dr. Cooper.

Bag heavy and hands warm from the half drank tea, you trekked across campus in the cool fall air, pulling your scarf tighter around against the biting wind. Once you were standing outside her office door, you took one last inhale before tossing your cardboard cup in the trash.

When you stepped into her cozy office, you were stopped in your tracks by the most beautiful man you’d ever seen.

“Good afternoon, Y/N, this is James Barnes, a friend of mine. He works at Melville House Publishing in Brooklyn. When I found out he would be in town for a couple weeks, I gave him a call to see if he would be interested in reading your draft - and he is very interested.”

Immediately, you offered your hand to him, still amazed by not only his beauty now, but his purpose in your advisor’s office. Trying not to let your voice shake, you greeted him, “Hi, Mr. Barnes, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

His grip was so warm it took all your willpower not to melt into a puddle at his feet as he flashed you an award winning smile.

“The pleasure’s all mine, doll. And please, call me Bucky. Mr. Barnes makes me feel old.” He chuckled at the look of confusion at the nickname. “Middle name’s Buchanan - my friends call me Bucky.”

His friends call him Bucky. Holy shit, part of you hoped you wouldn’t see him after this - because you were sure he would be the death of you - while the other part wanted to see how warm his hands felt on other parts of your body.

The three of you spent a good few minutes chatting, mainly about you, as it seemed Bucky was indeed very interested. The room was hardly big enough to accommodate the three of you, especially given Bucky’s size, and you couldn’t make a move without some part of your body bumping into his. His arm grazed the full length of your own when he shifted to take a look at his watch, and when he got up to leave, you had to look straight up for how much he towered over you.

“Well, Beth, I better get going, but thank you for introducing me.” He gave her a quick peck on the cheek before turning back towards you, with what looked like his business card in his hand. “Here’s this, my cell number is written on the back. I’d love to meet with you soon, maybe lunch or coffee, if that’s okay with you.”

You tried not to look too eager as you nodded your head, feeling his hand linger for just a second when he gave you a second, more gentle handshake. You could feel Dr. Cooper’s stare as you watched him brush past you in the small office, and he disappeared with one last glance into the room.

“He’s quite handsome, isn’t he?” she smirked, already shuffling papers around as she sat back at her desk. You simply rolled your eyes, desperately hoping you could blame the heat radiating from your body on the layers you began to shed as you plopped into the chair opposite her.

“Oh god, what did you do?” Though you tried your best to glare at her, you couldn’t help the smile that tugged at the corner of your lips just thinking about Bucky. She, of course, noticed this.

“I didn’t do anything, young lady, now quit those heart eyes and hand over that final draft.”

You sat in expectant silence as she went over your last edits, then just stared at the cover for a long time. When she finally looked back up at you, you could see the tears glistening in her eyes.

Your first instinct was to get up and comfort her, but when you made a move, she just waved you off as she wiped under her eyes.

“Oh, quit that, don’t worry about me. I am just so damn proud of you, Y/N, you’ve worked so hard for this.”

“Thank you, Dr. Cooper, I -”

Her huff cut you off. “For the love of god, girl, will you finally call me Beth now? You’re technically not my student anymore.” Her eyes were still shiny with pride, even as she laughed at you.

You joined her in laughing at the habit you had refused to break, even once it was clear she was more your friend than your superior. Not trusting your voice, you just nodded your head as your own eyes began to well up. Standing, you tugged her arm and pulled her into a hug, needing to show your gratitude.

When you finally pulled apart, she gave you a small pat on the cheek before you stepped back around the desk and sat down again.

Long into the evening, you talked about your final draft as well as your plans for the future now that you had a Master’s degree and a full-fledged novel. She brought up Bucky again, which caused a burst of heat to spread through your face and chest at the mere thought of the man, and you waved her off before she could put her inappropriate notions into words. Before you left for the night, she pulled you into another hug, and told you again how incredibly proud she was of you and everything you had done.

With a last squeeze of her hand, you bundled yourself up to make your way home to your apartment, stopping for a cup of tea on the way.

Your hands were warm from the cardboard cup, and you were in such a good mood that you decided to take the long way home instead. You hadn’t had the chance to walk through the park by campus since the weather had changed, and this was your favorite time of year.

The beautiful red and orange and yellow of the leaves calmed you as you followed the path towards home, and the crunch of the fallen leaves beneath your boots gave you the urge to toss yourself into a pile like you were a kid again. The giddiness building inside you was something you hadn’t felt in a long time, and it felt damn good.

When you passed a couple holding hands on your left, your thoughts wandered to Bucky. The skip of your heart was also something you hadn’t felt in a long time. It was just your luck that these feelings would be sprung on you for someone who was essentially unattainable. Not only was he god knows how many years older than you, he was a close friend of your mentor for the last six years, and he essentially held your future in his hands.

It was like you were a magnet for fucking things up, but you couldn’t help the warmth that spread through you when you remembered the brush of his fingertips against yours or his demanding presence in Beth’s small office.

You were like a love sick teenager, something you told yourself you would never be, even when you actually were a teenager. This felt forgein and exciting and you desperately needed to rein yourself in before you did something stupid.

The rest of the walk home you pushed all thoughts away and simply existed. For the first time in almost two decades you were free from school - for good - and it felt like the weight of the world was lifted from your shoulders for the time being. Not ready to think about your next steps, or Bucky, or even anything past tonight, you strolled through the beautiful Boston autumn enjoying yourself, enjoying life.

“You fucking graduated!” Wanda and Natasha both cheered, nearly drained glasses raised in the air. You came home to your roommates with an already mixed pitcher of god knows what and they were looking to celebrate.

They crowded you as soon as you had set your bag down, pulling you into a tight group hug, Wanda smattering congratulatory kisses all over your face. At Nat’s slight pout, she cupped her girlfriend’s face in her hands before giving her the same treatment, causing all three of us to break out into a fit of giggles.

Those excited giggles quickly turned to tipsy ones as the three of you drained the pitcher and Nat went to make another. When she came back with three more full glasses, you decided to tell them the big news about Bucky - about him reading your book anyways.

“I don’t know guys, I’m nervous. I know I’ve been meeting with Beth for years, but this is completely different. It’s, like, the real deal. And he wants to meet me for coffee or lunch or something, but I don’t know if I’ll even text him.”

Their eyes nearly bulged out of their head at that.

“What do you mean you don’t know if you’ll text him? You have to do it now!” Wanda nearly shrieked. When she saw you about to protest, he cut you off before you could even begin to speak. “I’m serious, you can’t pass up an opportunity like this. Text him now!”

You contemplated it for a second, and the alcohol gave you enough courage to pull his business card from your pocket and type out a message, but not enough to actually send it. You were still narrowing your eyes at the screen as if the words had somehow offended you when Nat snatched it from your grip and hit send before you even knew what was happening.

Yelping, you grabbed it back from her, sending her the best glare you could muster, though the satisfied smirk on her face had it fizzling into giggles once again. Not wanting to work yourself up over it, you tossed your phone beside you and gave your full attention back to the girls who were now asking you more personal questions about Bucky.

“You all don’t even understand, I almost melted under this guy’s touch, he is ridiculously hot. And he’s older, you know how I feel about older guys. It’s a wonder I didn’t just get on my knees right there. God, I don’t know what I’m going to do when I see him again. I felt like I had literally never interacted with a man before, that’s how much he floored me.”

“Oh he floored you, did he?” Nat said with a suggestive raise of her eyebrows. The three of you burst out laughing as you all continued to talk about how attractive he was and how you thought lunch would go.

You were so caught up in celebrating that you didn’t realize you had accidentally called Bucky when you grabbed your phone from Natasha, and the entire conversation was now saved in his voicemail.

taglist *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

@ducky2104 @supersoldiersimp @mrsbarnesinmyimagination @demongirl1917 @writing-for-marvel @zbutx @asgardwinter @thesneakylittleminx @winth0rsoldier @carrotfantasimp @povlvr @cutelittletwistedhorror @fyeahatised @enchantedbarnes @tlcwrites @maladaptivexxdaydreaming @subwaysurf45 @intrepidacious @ambrosiase @riverevelations @nexusnyx @buckydaddy @babycap @aquariusbarnes @gray-reads @starbuckie @lovinggbarnes @igotnoname4thisblog @signofthebarnes @cupidsbarnes

if your user is scored i couldn't tag you! - but you can go back and change your response on the google form

#bucky barnes #bucky fic #bucky series #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes reader insert #marvel #mcu #marvel au #mcu au #all you need

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jillianallen14 · 4 years ago

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Spirk fanfic rec

Some amazing Spirk fanfic to bless your dash because I’m falling in love with this shit all over again (this is like the 10th time this has happened lol):

Entering Orbit: Jim escapes to Iowa to avoid the media frenzy following the Narada incident, but a late-night miscommunication results in Spock turning up on his front porch; rated m; 30,957 words

Papers in the Roadside: Non-Starfleet AU. Jim owns a small bar in Chicago, keeps on picking up strays and taking care of everyone no matter how hard it makes his own life. Spock is a journalist writing feature articles for the Chicago Tribune; he depicts the world with uncanny skill, but hides more than one personal drama and is possibly under surveillance from the Vulcan royal family. They meet by accident just before their lives start to spin out of control; rated e; 49,637 words

Take Refuge in What You Know: AU - Kirk has moved into a apartment/house and wants to get to know his neighbors. He meets his neighbor Spock, a loner who suffers from extreme agoraphobia. Kirk thinks he's beautiful enigma; rated e; 120,334 words

Listen, this is not only my favorite Star Trek fic of all time, it’s also one of my favorite fanfics in general. It’s right up there with Text Talk and The Shoebox Project from the HP fandom, which if you’ve read, you know are incredible and frankly life-changing. And this fanfic changed my life. The description the author gives doesn’t do the beauty of this fic justice. I suffer from agoraphobia and Spock’s depiction as an agoraphobic man was probably the most well-researched, sympathetic, empathetic, caring, realistic portrayal of what it’s like to be agoraphobic that I’ve ever witnessed in fiction. It made me cry like a child because I had never felt so seen and understood. This writer is incredible, and this fic is incredible. I can’t recommend it enough. It’s an AU, which I’m usually pretty wary about, but it barely even feels like an AU. It just feels like Jim and Spock. The author’s understanding of both of their characters’ is perfect, like just a spot-on portrayal of who they are. This fic genuinely helped me accept who I am and helped me understand that I am capable of & deserving of love. If you don’t read any other Star Trek fics (and you def should read more Star Trek fics because they’re amazing), then let this one be the one you read. I dare you not to read it three times in a row like I did.

Observations: First Officer Spock comments on life aboard the Enterprise and his service under Captain James T. Kirk; rated m; 500,000+ words.

So the author of this fic actually did a thing where they made this fic into two books (similar to what The Shoebox Project authors did many years ago in the HP fandom). They don’t get any money from people buying the books; the cost is just to go towards producing the books. This fic is the equivalent of two LARGE novels. We’re talking 600 pages & up. It’s a huge fic. Now, that being said, I read it in one day. ONE DAY. It’s that good. This is another one of my all-time favorite fics, though not quite as dear to my heart as the one I listed above. It’s focused on AOS, and tbh, I forget that what happens in this book isn’t actually canon. Like it’s so well-told, it just feels like it’s now part of the timeless story of Kirk & Spock. The “professional” Star Trek writers would never be brave enough to do what this author does with Kirk and Spock, though. This fic will make you angry, will make you laugh, will make you cry. It has such a good grasp on every single character. It also shows the love between the crew of the Enterprise, which is always a treat, and it’s beautifully done in this fic. It has a sorta-enemies-to-lovers arc between Spirk and an enemies-to-close-friends arc between Spock and McCoy that is beautifully done and fleshed out. This fic is definitely a journey to go through, and I can’t recommend it enough. It’s extremely slow burn, and you will want to slap both Kirk and Spock (and McCoy) upside the head at certain points lol.

Of Coffee Beans and Green Tea Leaves: The progression of a relationship, through Coffee Beans and Green Tea Leaves. Basically, it’s an AU where Kirk works at a coffee shop to pay his way through school, and Spock visits often. rated t; 16,429 words

Love, love, love, this fic. It’s cute, it’s in character. They have kind of a rocky start together, so it’s got a little bit of that Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy i-hated-you-but-now-i-love-you-marry-me vibes to it. I’m a sucker for that, if you haven’t figured that out by now lol. It’s really good, and a really enjoyable read. And it’s not too long, if you’re in the mood for something on the shorter end of things.

Please Don’t Touch the Vulcans: The "yes" is out of Jim's mouth before he can think about it. Jim is chipper about having time off for the holidays. He asks everyone if they want to spend time together but sadly, everyone ditches Jim over the holidays because they have plans. McCoy visits his daughter, Nyota visits her family, and everyone splits. Not knowing Spock has feelings for him, Jim doesn't even bother asking if he wants to spend time together figuring he has something to do. Something cute, romantic with the boys spending time with one another and confessions; rated m; 17,690 words

Super cute and has lots of Sarek, which idk about y’all, but I’m always a fan of. Sarek and Jim kind of get to know each other a bit, and it’s cute. Sarek knows about they’re in love before Spock & Kirk know lol. If I remember correctly, there’s also some appearances from everyone’s favorite: Old!Spock! You also get a little bit of jealous and protective Young!Spock. So you’re in for a real treat with this one.

The Ren shat’var Trilogy: A split-second decision changes Jim's life forever, as he enters into a bond with Spock in the face of certain torture. Enemies to the Federation emerge from unlikely places, and the command team must contend with unexpected threats, as well as challenges within their own intense relationship. In this three-part series, the Enterprise races across the galaxy to confront the unknown, and Jim and Spock discover the true significance of their unprecedented connection; rated e; 184,411 words

Textual Attraction: Valentine’s Day does not bring up pleasant memories for Cadet Kirk. But the serendipitous switch-up of his cell phone with a particular Vulcan professor’s will make his day far more interesting –and romantic. Perhaps some new memories can be made! 15,900 words

SO GOOD. Just SO good

Spaceman: Academy AU. Five times Spock realizes he's attracted to a barista at the academy spaceport, and one time he decides to do something about it. rated t; 3728 words

Short, sweet, funny. You’ll love it.

Subtext: Texting your Vulcan first officer in the middle of the night is never a good idea. Especially when you have an obsessive crush on said Vulcan.The holidays are approaching and Jim is left entirely Spockless aboard the Enterprise when his First takes shore leave on New Vulcan. After some midnight pining, Jim sends a text he instantly regrets. That is, until Spock responds and willingly continues their textual communications to an inevitable conclusion; rated t; 13,032 words

Cute, sweet, funny. It’s a texting fic. I think you’ve probably figured out I love those. This one makes me laugh so fucking hard. Like actually laugh-out-loud-omg-did-i-just-snort kind of funny. Spock is great in this one

All Spock Wants For Christmas: While Jim is away on a delegation mission, he panics about what to give Spock for Christmas. With help from Bones and Uhura, and in between some spam texting with Spock, Jim realizes he already has the perfect gift. And all it needs is wrapping paper and a bow; rated t; 11,966 words

And here we have another cute, sweet, funny texting fic. Sue me lol

The Morning After: Jim convinces Spock to take shore leave with him on Risa, hoping the time together will help re-solidify their bond of friendship after some recent tension. Meanwhile, Spock convinces himself he's on Risa for one reason and one reason only, to prevent his wayward captain from getting into trouble. After a passionately illogical night of Romulan Ale and chocolate infused liquor, everything changes when Jim wakes with something other than a hangover filling his head. Something he's sure neither he nor Spock can handle. Because if Jim knows anything for sure, it's that his messed up thoughts belong nowhere near Spock's clean, ordered mind; rated m; 50,381 words

HAHA. This fic fucking cracks me up. You’ve got drunk boys pining over each other & not realizing it. You’ve got accidental marriage. You’ve got bed sharing. It’s great, it’s cute, it’s funny.

Take This Sinking Boat (And Point It Home): In which Spock pines, Jim isn’t stupid (except he kind of is), and Christopher Pike has had enough of this bullshit; 6698 words

Pike is great in this one, and it’s super, super funny.

Extracurricular Activities: Spock returns to the Academy from a tour of duty to find an intriguing cadet captures his attention; rated e; 15,433 words

Veritas: Basically, Kirk and Spock are on trial because the Federation thinks they are emotionally compromised by each other, which is putting the lives of their crew in danger. They have to convince a court they’re not actually in love with each other. They think the claims are bullshit. They think it will be easy to prove that they aren’t in love or emotionally compromised, damn it. It isn’t; rated m; 186,80 words

This one is so, so good. A real gem off of Fanfic.net. I remember it was actually one of the first Spirk fanfics I ever read, and it blew me away. The progression of their relationship is really well-done and interesting. It has star-crossed lovers vibes and has some really emotionally intense moments in it, especially for Spock.

A Habitual Affection: Living in 1930s New York with the Vulcan you're secretly in love with is no simple thing. But Jim never liked anything simple. And then, the big snowstorm hit...; rated t; 7998 words

A beautiful TOS fic about one of the gayest episodes of Star Trek. Love this one.

Atlas: Between what was and what will be stands James Tiberius Kirk, in all his fractured patchwork glory. Because saving the Federation was only the beginning; rated t; 135,529 words

A beaut. Really great characterization, and the progression of Jim and Spock’s relationship is really well-done.

#spirk #spock #kirk #james t kirk #spock/kirk #kirk/spock #star trek #star trek tos #star trek aos #space husbands #spirk fanfic recs #spirk fanfic

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thefanficmonster · 4 years ago

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Corpse’s Girl

Corpse Husband x Reader (Female)

Warnings: Bullying, Swearing, Derogatory Terms

Genre: Angst, Fluff

Summary: Y/N’s life as a regular college student is forever stripped away from her when her relationship with the famous YouTuber Corpse Husband is accidentally revealed during an online class of hers. How will she cope with the sudden spotlight and the unwanted attention, some of which crosses into bullying?

Requested by my amazing Tumblr friend @itsminniekat 🥰 She’s been reading and liking my works since day one and I honestly couldn’t be more grateful. If you’re reading this, all I can say is thank you, darling. Thank you so much for sticking by my blog even when I posted some crappy fics. I’ll make sure this ain’t one of them. Love you with all my heart. ❤❤❤

P.S. - I named the mean character with my name so I hope no one who reads this has the same name. Wouldn’t want any of you feeling like the villain 😘

Who knew online class would be even more boring than being physically present for a lecture? Seriously, I find myself doing the weirdest of crap to entertain myself - like trying to balance a pen on the tip of my nose for example. I jot down some notes every now and then but that’s basically it. My mind can not fathom the concept on concentrating on whatever my professors are going on and on about. Well, full disclosure, I couldn’t concentrate even if I wanted to, especially with my boyfriend streaming in the other room.

He’s currently playing Among Us with his usual gaming squad. Listening to his input during the discussions, I can always tell when he’s lying. I honestly find it hilarious that his friends can’t pick up when he’s bullshitting them. I sometimes wonder if he has brainwashed them. And that’s one of the main reasons we don’t play Among Us together - he can’t lie to me. Not only do I pick up on his con with ease, but he always says he feels bad when he lies to me which is just the sweetest thing. Also, I refuse to play cause I’m shy. His friends are all well-known content creators and I’m a literal nobody. Every now and then I find myself wondering why Corpse is even with me. He’s always quick to push those thoughts out of my head and make sure they don’t return on a long notice, but they do interrupt my peace from time to time.

“Y/N, do you know?“ The sound of my professor saying my name takes me out of my eavesdropping of Corpse’s stream.

I panic, but quickly improvise, “Sorry, my internet is slow, you cut out for a second. What was the question?” I feel my face heating up, making me glad we are allowed to keep our cameras off.

“Question number 15 on page 82 in your textbook. Do you know the answer to it?“ My professor repeats himself, his tone annoyed.

I look down at the page that’s already opened in front of me. I let out a sigh of relief, seeing that the question is rather easy.

“Yeah, um, it’s...“ Suddenly, Corpse’s laugh reaches my room loud and clear. There’s no doubt my mic picked up the noise, especially since the door to my room is open.

The color drains from my face as I hurry to say the answer and remute myself. My eyes are wide as I stare at my screen, hoping no one will acknowledge that very recognizable laugh.

“OMG Y/N, are you watching a Corpse Husband stream in class?” One of the bitches in my class, Vy, speaks up, “Not a very goody-two-shoe move on your part, dear.”

I purposely unmute my mic to mumble a quick ‘Shut up, bitch’ that somehow manages to fly under my professor’s radar and the class continues. It’s the first time something like this has happened and I’m not sure if I handled it properly or not.

The class ends shortly after, allowing me a sigh of relief as I disconnect from the meeting.

“Fucking finally.“ I mumble to myself, leaning back in my desk chair. Tilting my head backwards, I see Corpse standing in the doorframe. I grin, not only because his presence itself makes me ten times happier, but also because he’s upside down from my viewpoint. “Well, hello there! How long have you been spying on me?“

He struts over to me, leaning his face over mine, “Long enough.” His lips linger above mine without any actual contact before he pulls away, allowing me to sit up straight and proper in the chair. “You still have classes?”

I nod my head while disappointedly rolling my eyes, “Yeah. One more. Shouldn’t be too bad since it’s English Lit. You’re done streaming?”

“Yeah, I just have some other things to do. I haven’t done a narration video in a while, I miss making that type of content.“ He plops down on my bed, running a hand through his messy black curls.

“Weren’t you recording some lines a few days ago?“ I frown as I try to recall if what I’m referring to actually happened or my brain is too fried to decipher reality from my bootleg perception of it. Online class, man - messes with your head like sleeping pills - makes you disoriented and exhausted with barely doing anything other than trying to wrap your brain around a lecture or two.

He hums affirmatively, “It’s not a finished project and I don’t even know if I’ll use those or rerecord them. I’ll have to listen to them again before I make a final decision.“

I tilt his chin upwards with my pointer finger, a gesture he has told me he finds very endearing, “I’m sure they’re great and you just refuse to be satisfied. Everything you do is great.“

He smiles a small, shy smile, his fingers gently wrapping around my wrist, holding my hand in place, “You’re biased. You like me too much to tell me when I do some bullshit.”

I scoff, “You know that isn’t true. If someone’s gonna kick your butt in formation, it’s gonna be me.“ I give him a quick kiss on the forehead before pulling away from him, “Go on, now. I have a class to attend. You distract me enough while you’re in the other room, I can only imagine how hard it’d be for me to focus if you were right by my side.“

He smirks, bowing a little as he makes his way out of the room, “You flatter me.”

I playfully roll my eyes, getting my headset back on as I tap the last class for the day. We have an assignment due to the start of the class which we’ll have to present if the professor approved of it. We basically had to write a psychoanalysis of a character from any book of our choice. I chose Heathcliff from ‘Wuthering Heights’ which is one of my favorite books of all time. I’m proud of what I wrote and the way I wrote it, but I’ve always barely scraped by with a B in this class, a B+ if I’m lucky, so I’ve never gotten any major credit, even when I put my 110% in the assignments and projects.

Well, color me surprised when the professor calls on me first to read my work, complimenting it on its detailed and specific nature. I get my printed assignment out in front of me and unmute myself.

“I wrote a psychoanalysis on for Heathcliff, a character from Emily Bronte’s novel ‘Wuthering Heights’.“ Just after I say this line, Corpse’s voice booms throughout the whole apartment, no doubt being picked up by my mic. It doesn’t sound like he’s actually talking, he can’t be that loud. I put two and two together when I recognize the lines he’s saying - the ones he recorded a few days ago. They’re coming from his computer speakers. He probably didn’t check the volume before playing back the recording.

I mute myself as quickly as possible, but it’s too late. The voice dies down as Corpse probably turned down the speakers.

My professor, who is already done with this lecture, just annoyedly remarks, her words overdosed with sarcasm: “Read your assignment and you can go back to whatever it is you are watching.”

“Wow, Y/N! Again?! Are you one of those crazy obsessed fans or something? Is Corpse Husband all you watch?“ This bitch is really poking a stick at me, huh? The only crazy obsessed fan here is her, and my friends but they are allowed. Little do all of them know, I am obsessed but not simply over a YouTuber. I’m obsessed with my boyfriend who just happens to be a YouTuber.

“No commentary, please.“ The professor scolds her, “Go on, Y/N.“

I finish reading without any other disturbances. The professor compliments my essay again when I’m done, the small incident at the beginning forgotten already. Well, not by everyone. One of my friends shot me a quick text to joke about it which only earned an eye roll from me.

My friends don’t know that I’m dating Corpse either. As I said, they are simping HARD over him while I act the most indifferent on the subject. Whenever they ask my opinion on him I either say ‘he’s OK’ or just avoid answering completely. I know saying anything more enthusiastic than that would turn into a snowball rolling down a snowy hill - I’d just keep babbling about how nice, amazing, wonderful and a gift to this world Corpse is, inevitably revealing our relationship in the process.

I’m afraid of revealing my relationship with Corpse in front of these people. They are all run on jealousy and selfishness and I can only imagine how mean they’d be about it. I’m already not too fond of them, it would only be worse if any of my personal life was exposed.

When the class finally ends I remove my headset, putting my forehead down on the desk, barely missing the keyboard. I groan in frustration and anger at myself for not fighting back. I could’ve and should’ve said something - ANYTHING. But what? That’s a question I can’t find the answer to.

“Hey...“ Corpse’s hesitant voice comes from behind me, “You ok?“

I straighten my posture, turning to him with a smile. “Yeah, but these people suck.”

I get up from my chair as he approaches me, basically falling in his arms. The comfort I feel radiating off of him makes me relax, forget the past hour or so. He has always had this effect on me. Like my own personal kryptonite to my anger and anxiety.

“Did I get you in any trouble because of that?“ His voice shows clear concern and guilt.

I wrap my arms around him tighter, burying my head in his chest. “No, don’t worry about it.“

And I really wasn’t in trouble. Not until now that the video is officially posted....

I can call these people dumb all I want but they sure put two and two together awfully fast. They recognized the lines they heard during class as the same ones from his new video that came out almost a week after the incident, aka two days ago. It’s safe to say I haven’t touched my phone or computer since.

“This is all my fault.“

Of all the horrible things I suspected would happen this has to be the worst - Corpse is blaming himself for it. I am prepared to take all the shit these people have to throw at me but seeing Corpse beating himself up over this is killing me. No amount of convincing can change his mind. Nothing I say helps.

“Please, stop doing this to yourself. Non of this is your fault, Corpse.“ I’ve repeated this sentence more than a thousand time these past forty eight hours, each time saying it more and more desperately.

“All of it is my fault, Y/N. I’m so sorry. I hate myself so much.“ Has been his reply single time.

I can’t watch him be so mean to himself. It’s the most conflicting thing when the person you love most is torturing themselves. It’s easy if it’s someone else doing it, you just kick their ass. But what are you supposed to do when the person you want to protect is the same one you need to protect them from.

Corpse has shut himself away in his recording room these past few hours and though he clearly needs to be alone, he still left the door open just a crack cause he knows I’ll be worried sick otherwise.

While I’m alone in the living room, I’ve finally managed to brace myself and build enough courage to power up my laptop. Last time it was on it was going mad with notifications.

“It’s digital. Only digital. It can’t hurt you too badly if it can’t touch you, right?“ I mumble to myself, already frustrated despite not having yet seen all the horrors that await me.

And horrors there were. Everywhere. Twitter. Instagram. Facebook.

My grades. Some pictures of me no one has ever seen. My school files. People from my class tweeting Corpse to ‘expose’ me for the ‘slut’ or ‘bitch’ I really am. Corpse hasn’t touched social media either and I plan on making sure it stays that way. God only knows how much worse he’ll get if he sees these claims.

And then, like a notification sent straight from hell, an email from my professor.

Practical lectures on Friday. Be here at 9 AM. Don’t forget your mask and gloves.

Good thing I opened my laptop when I did. Friday is tomorrow and I need to prepare for this day. Not only do I need to hit the books but I need to toughen up a bit. I can’t go there looking like I feel - like a mess.

Alright, time to put the brave face on. No more wallowing in it, at least not until tomorrow afternoon.

I make a study plan and hop in the shower. I feel the need to apologize to my hair for washing it so roughly, basically yanking at my strands from frustration that has been suppressed for too long.

I get our of the boiling hot shower, red as a lobster, and change into some clean comfortable clothes and put my ass in study mode. I remove all the scary expectations of the morning to come from my mind and let the information the textbooks has to offer seep into my brain.

* * *

I’m about to head out and, despite my put-together composure, I am a wreck inside. I actually put effort into my appearance, I mean - I even styled my hair. A pretty façade to hide a ruin.

I saw my friends’ texts last night, all three of them ending their friendship with me because they felt betrayed. I haven’t yet decided how to feel about that. Doesn’t matter at the moment, there are more important matters at hand, aka surviving the next three hours.

My college is within ten minutes walking distance from our apartment. That ten minute walk has never been so stressful, not even during exam season. The air feels a little harder to breathe, the path a little shorter to walk. And my moment of reckoning a little too close.

I feel eyes on me the second I start walking through the park of our campus. Sure, I could just be paranoid, but the feeling is too real to be just my imagination in overdrive. I’m glad I have my hair down and a mask on so the redness of my cheeks and neck isn’t on display. That’s a sign of weakness right now.

We have two an hour and a half long classes between which we have a snack break that’s half an hour. I usually enjoy that period but I’m dreading it now. These assholes can only be so mean in the presence of a professor, but during lunch break they can increase that tenfold.

“Well if it isn’t Corpse’s girl.“ I hear that a lot. The whispers are not so much whispers as intentionally loud enough for me to hear remarks. I’m not bothered by them, it’s the least they can do. If I let such a simple thing get to me, I’d be crumbling by the end of first period.

I hear some shuffling behind me and out of the corner of my eye I see, yeah you guessed it, THAT bitch. She’s standing as close to me as she can without violating Covid regulations. A mask is covering her face but the menacing look in her eyes tells me all I need to know about the interaction that’s about to go down.

“I’d ask how much he pays you for the hour.....“ her long nails tap the wooden desk, “but that’d be rude. I bet it’s tough being a maid. Do you just clean or are you a multipurpose lap dog? No offense, I’m genuinely curious.“

“Vy, would you be so kind as to give Y/N some room to breathe?“ The professor asks as he nonchalantly walks in.

Vy rolls her eyes, batting her eyelashes at me, “Talk to you later, sweetheart.” With a fake friendly wave she’s out of my hair, at least for now.

Remember what I said about these people not being as dumb as I pegged them to be? Yeah, scratch that. These fuckers actually tried getting away with taking pictures of me with flash in broad daylight. Like, HELLO! I have two functioning eyes and a brain, I’m onto you. Sadly, me having figured out their childish but hurtful methods of humiliating me doesn’t change much. They still posted the pics they took, using the most derogatory terms they could find in the English language, always making sure to tag Corpse and me both.

Needless to say, these were the longest three hours of my life.

* * *

Shutting the door to our apartment behind me causes relief of the highest levels. I feel like I’ve locked out all the bad shit I have had to deal with these past twenty four hours.

I’m tired. I’m fucking exhausted. I feel like a discarded piece of paper.

And it all starts crumbling. A wall is bound to start slowly falling apart after being hit over and over again, each time feeling the blows with a stronger intensity.

I slide down the door sitting down on the floor and slowly taking my shoes off. I put my bag beside me and wrap my arms around my knees, hiding my head in the space between them and my chest.

One tear slides down my cheek.

Another follows.

And another, this time accompanied by a choked sob.

A pair of arms wraps around the ball that my body has been shaped into. One of his hands comes up to stroke my hair gently, feeding me the comfort I have been longing for since I left the apartment this morning.

“I saw it. All of it. All the shit they talk about you. All the names they call you. And I’ve never wanted to beat so many people up simultaneously.“ His words make me raise my head from its low position, giving him a knowing look. “I wish I could. I would, but that would land me in jail. Which doesn’t even sound so bad cause I don’t like going out. Only problem is you wouldn’t be with me. I wouldn’t want you to be there with me, don’t get me wrong, I’d never want you to end up in jail. I-...” I cut him off by pressing my lips to his. A quick kiss that says so much but mainly shows the immeasurable gratitude for his support.

Seeing those awful tweets and comments had the complete opposite effect on him. He no longer blames himself but the people who actually deserve the blame - all those jerks from my college.

I pull away, giving him a small smile. “I would never let you go to jail.”

He smiles back at me, overjoyed that my mood is slowly being lifted, “Come on, I have a nice crowd that would like to meet you.”

I know exactly what he means. Felix, Sean, Rae, Dave, Sykkuno and the rest of his friends. The people I’ve been so shy and afraid to meet since day one. Being shy doesn’t really make sense now, seeing as how they know I exist and that I’m a part of Corpse’s life.

What do I have to lose?

“Guys, this is my girlfriend, Y/N.“ Corpse’s black avatar runs around my cyan one in the Among Us lobby.

I can’t help but giggle when I unmute my mic, “Hi everyone! It’s so nice to finally meet you.“ They each introduce themselves, expressing how happy they are to be meeting me too.

It’s the first time in what feels like a while that I’m truly having fun. These people are wonderful, each so unique and lovely. They never brought up the scandal nor acted as though they knew about it. I know they did and I am beyond grateful that they never mentioned it or treated me any differently because of it. Also, Corpse was streaming the whole time. I had my phone on his stream, my eyes nervously scanning the chat every now and then. I couldn’t believe it. Corpse’s real fans were just as wonderful as his friends - they were nothing but supportive and happy to have met me.

Now, I can either choose to believe these people were being so nice to me out of sympathy or I can believe they really like me and appreciate me for who I am and not for what happened to me.

I choose to believe the latter.

And while I’m still getting accustomed to this whole new spotlight, I know I’ll be able to handle it as long as I’m holding Corpse’s hand in the process. All I need is to have him beside me and I’m prepared to tackle anything.

“They love you.“ Corpse tells me once the stream is done and we’ve hopped out of the Discord call, “But I love you more.“

His arms wrap around my waist while mine instinctively find their way around his neck, “I love them, too. But they’re at the number 2 spot.”

He smirks at me, “I wonder who’s at number 1.”

I push up on my toes, putting my lips an inch away from his, “Hmm, I wonder...”

He doesn’t let me finish, silencing my teasing with a sweet, loving kiss.

@susceptible-but-siriusexual @simonsbluee @save-the-sky @hacker-ghost @bi-andready-tocry @imtiredaffff @jazzkaurtheglorious @hereforbeebo @fandomgirl17 @chrysanthykios @maehemscorpyus @loraleiix @letsloveimagines @annshit @i-cant-choose-a-username-help @enigmaticmaze @divine-artemis @waterlilypat

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rainy-day-coffee · 4 years ago

Note

hi... how about head cannons about the dorm leaders with a magical girl mc from either the puella magi magica madoka, magical girl site, magical girl raising project or princess tutu universe please?

I'll be doing Magical Girl Raising Project for this one! I’ll be using the abilities found in the anime since I’m not creative enough to think of any myself. The personalities of the characters themselves have nothing to do with the abilities I chose, they’re their own person! This is written as platonic! I hope this is alright!

As an extra note, this was a really interesting topic to write about. I enjoyed it! I actually just binge watched this anime for this request! It was quite good, I might pick up the light novels!

Warning: Mild mentions of gore; spoilers for Magical Girl Raising Project(?)

Dorm leaders reacting to a Magical Girl Mc

A new game has been released! Customize your own Magical Girl and work hard to defeat monsters!

Granted a 1-in-10,000 chance to be a real-life Magical Girl, the unfortunate souls who agree to the contract are unknowingly pulled into a world of bloodshed. All Magical Girls are expected to collect Magical candies through acts of helpfulness. Whomever is at the bottom of the ranking list by the end of the week is greeted by death. That is, if they can even make it that far.

Magic: Swimming through objects as if they were water - the objects do not affect the user as they pass through them.

He’s never heard of an ability quite like yours! It isn’t teleportation--it’s literally going through objects, ignoring any kind of barrier. It sounds impossible. Understandably, he doesn’t believe you until you show him.

Please refrain from popping out of random places in an attempt to scare him. He doesn’t want to be on edge everyday, the stress he has now is more than enough.

He’s curious about the whole situation. Just how and why did these “people” wrap you (and others) into such a terrible contract? How is it possible to grant these special abilities onto otherwise magicless people? Unfortunately, you most likely don’t have answers for those questions.

Sadly, Riddle doesn’t know of a way to help you out of this. The library may have some information, but the chances are slim nonetheless. He can offer assistance in candy collecting instead!

Something always seems to be going on at his dorm, it would help him greatly if you were to keep an eye on everything and everyone. He knows it isn’t much, but every little bit counts. You have his full support.

Magic: Entering the dreams of others - the ability to pass through the Dream World, granting access to the dreams of those who are currently sleeping.

He’s extremely annoyed. He doesn’t understand what’s happening. He’s only seen you a couple times before, so why do you seem to plague all of his dreams?

In his dreams, you move so vividly and in-character, it baffles him. Dream versions of people can be accurate, but never to such an extent each time. He’ll confront you about it soon enough. He has no evidence of what you’re doing, however vivid memories of dream-you push him to demand answers anyways.

Highly uncomfortable to know his dreams, his usual safe place, can be invaded by a person. He demands that you stop. You can go bother someone else, he doesn’t need that kind of help. If he sees you in there one more time, he may have to resort to other methods to get you to stop.

In regards to earning candies, unless you ask him specifically for help, there isn’t much he can do. You can always help Ruggie out with chores around Savanaclaw and you’ll be set. It’s a good deal for both sides, you can earn some candies and Leona can finally sleep comfortably again.

He finds the system you’re stuck in deplorable. Unfortunately, he can’t get you out of it, but if you ever need extra help he can always have Ruggie find one or two ways to get you those extra candies you need.

Magic: Hearing the thoughts of those in need - with enough training, the user can pinpoint the location of a person. Additionally, they can hear thoughts apart from cries for help.

Your special magic interests him greatly. He already has a good pool of information of all the students, but being able to hear their most inner thoughts is something truly amazing. No amount of research could easily give him those kinds of details.

He has the twins watch over you for a bit, gathering as much information as they can about your situation and what you go about doing.

Given the circumstances, he doubts he can rob this ability of yours through a contract. This does however present an amazing opportunity.

This could blossom into a wonderful partnership. You need to collect candies, and he’s always willing to accept requests from those “poor” souls who need help. By helping him, you can meet your quota! The rules never did mention what kind of help you were limited to offer after all.

He pities you, nothing can be done about your situation at the moment. You can rest assured though, you’ll never be at the bottom of the leaderboard with him around!

When time allows it, Floyd and Jade will be busy poking their noses where they don’t belong. The mascot that appears when you’re around seems to come from that phone you use. If they can see it, then that means these beings have made a mistake somehow. Is it possible to find a way to free you from this through that?

Magic: Transforming into any biologically living being - the size and shape of the creature do not matter, anything is fair game.

When he first discovers your special magic, he’ll be amazed! Transformation magic isn’t exactly easy, so being able to turn into whatever creature you want sounds like a lot of fun!

He’ll be begging you to turn into a wide variety of animals. Can you please turn into a tiger? How about an elephant? Maybe an alpaca? This could go on for hours if you don’t stop him.

Upon learning the darker side of the Magical Girl world, he starts to cry. He knows the world isn’t all sunshine and rainbows, but this is too cruel. You didn’t know you would suffer this way. They should have at least given you all the information beforehand. Better yet, they shouldn’t be doing something so awful in the first place.

Because he finds it hard to keep secrets from Jamil, he ends up telling him about you. He then needs to convince Jamil that you aren’t trying to get him killed.

He goes around asking if people need help. He wants to do everything he can to ensure you survive. Money can’t get you out of this game, he’s tried to use it but that mascot that follows you around always refuses it.

Kalim doesn’t want you to die. Just thinking about it makes his head spin and worry bubble. It wouldn’t be his fault if you died in the first place, but the guilt would consume him entirely.

Magic: Freely manipulating sound - the user can generate sound from anywhere and even recreate the voices of others. As an added result of this ability, the user has enhanced hearing.

Vil won’t forgive you if you decide to mimic Epel’s voice so he can escape. He may be evading his lessons for now, but Vil will find a way to drill them into him later on.

He never would have thought such a thing was possible. This terrible fate you’ve had forced onto you makes no sense. The beautiful power you’ve been given is nothing compared to the price. He doesn’t blame you, he blames whatever is doing this.

If such a game exists in the world of Twisted Wonderland, he’ll use his influence to dissuade people from playing. Vil will do this behind the scenes of course, his public image has to remain intact.

He actively requests your assistance. For example, helping his dorm improve their instrument playing--your impressive hearing can detect small mistakes they need to work on. Apart from this, he regrettably can’t offer more help.

Hone your abilities and work with what you have. He knows you can prevail. Please take care of yourself as you move forward.

Magic: Receiving one futuristic tool a day - the ability to randomly pick one useful tool out of 444,444,444. The tool breaks down and is no longer of use after a day passes.

He’s in awe. A real life Magical Girl! To think they could really exist outside of anime! Just what kind of world did you come from? Forget living in a world where magic is common, Magical Girls are on a different level entirely! Curiosity gnaws at him, but given how shy he is he won’t approach you with questions himself. Ortho is more than happy to ask any questions for him in his place though!

Once he finds out you’re one of those Magical Girls, he feels a tad sympathetic. You really got the short end of the stick in life didn’t you? He knew the possibility was there, that trope is not uncommon, but a small piece of him wished it wasn’t the case.

He supposes your special magic can be compared to gacha luck. You never really know what you’re going to get. Unfortunately, in your case you can’t even calculate rates for good rolls.

If you’re willing to let him, he’ll happily take apart the tools and gadgets you get from your daily pull. One of those future items should help him create even better machines than he can now! And even they can’t, disassembling and reassembling objects he’s never seen is a thrill in and of itself

If you happen to hear a small tip from Ortho or someone else about an issue occurring around campus, it may or may not have been Idia. He has eyes all around the school, spotting problems is quite easy.

He’ll be rooting for you from the sidelines. You’re a protagonist in this story, he hopes you can make it through to the end.

Magic: Extreme regeneration - being able to recover from any wound so long as a portion of the user’s body is left.

Mortified when he finds your body all mangled and bruised after a rough “accident.” Malleus is ready to destroy whoever or whatever did this to you. He cares about you greatly, the very thought of seeing you in such a state makes his stomach churn and pure rage wash over him.

Once you explain your situation, he can grasp enough to understand the major gist of it. He doesn’t quite know what a “Magical Girl” is but obviously it isn’t something good. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be in such a terrible situation.

To know that you can take care of yourself in the face of danger, makes him relieved. Although he doesn’t like the idea of you getting hurt at all, a healing ability is always wonderful to possess.

While you earn candies, Malleus will be working on a way to free you.

Even if these beings who granted you this ability are “all-powerful,” his magical capabilities are among the top in all the world. Perhaps, he can start by politely asking for answers from the leader of this group. If that seems to fail, killing off that mascot seems like a good place to start instead.

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst #twst x reader #twst headcanons #riddle rosehearts #riddle rosehearts x reader #leona kingscholar #leona kingscholar x reader #azul ashengrotto #azul ashengrotto x reader #kalim al asim #kalim al asim x reader #vil schoenheit #vil shoenheit x reader #idia shroud #idia shroud x reader #malleus draconia #malleus draconia x reader

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yukidragon · 3 years ago

Text

Our Life Snippet - Spoiling Dinner

So... been a while since I shared a slice of my fan novelization of Our Life: Beginnings and Always, hasn’t it? A whole month in fact. Yikes! Don’t worry, I’m still working on it, just, ya know, chronic illness. I’ve been getting less spoons to work with these past few weeks. Don’t be surprised if the next clip takes another month to appear.

Anyhoo, onto the clip itself. I figure why not show off some more drama from Step 2? It was referenced in the Adrift snippet that Jamie chose their thirteenth summer to be the time to reveal the big deal Cliff offered her to Cove, so I figured why not give a peek at that? So here’s another slice of Step 2′s moment, Dinner.

As always, thank you to everyone who enjoys reading my work and giving me such lovely feedback, especially the game’s lovely creators @gb-patch. I can’t thank you all enough for encouraging me to keep working on this self-indulgent little fan project.

...

Despite the fact that Cove and Elizabeth had never been friends, and it was rare they even really got along, it was always interesting to see and hear about how Jamie interacted with her big sister. The relationship Jamie and Elizabeth had was always something he could never quite get a grasp on.

“I can’t even imagine what it’d be like to have a sibling,” he admitted after a moment.

Jamie took some time to give serious thought to that statement. It was a tricky thing to explain to someone without a point of reference. A sibling relationship wasn’t anything like a parental one, and it wasn’t really like making friends with a kid who just happened to live in the same house either.

It was also hard for Jamie to want to touch on a topic that would bring the mood down. Still, Cove did remind her recently that he wanted to listen to her problems…

“It’s complicated,” Jamie eventually concluded. She took her time to choose her words with care as she focused her gaze on the tank again, though she didn’t really watch the fish this time. “I love Elizabeth, and when we were really little, we were best friends. Then she started making friends at school like Shiloh and, well… It’s just over time, I guess we just grew apart. She’s still a lot of fun to be around, but only when she wants to be there.” Her voice quieted a little. “But now, she barely feels like hanging out with me.”

Cove couldn’t think of how to respond right away as he grew aware of the melancholy that had settled over his best friend. He knew Jamie and Elizabeth didn’t spend all that much time together, but he hadn’t realized it was something that bothered Jamie. He took his time to consider what to say, pursing his lips as he tried to figure out the best way to help Jamie with something he never had to deal with before.

“Maybe you should talk to her about how you feel about it sometime,” Cove suggested, though with an uncertain note to his voice. He couldn’t even imagine how that talk might go. “If it’s really bothering you, I’m pretty sure Elizabeth would wanna know.”

Jamie considered that before shaking her head a little. “It’s fine. It’s not really that big a deal. Besides, I don’t think that’d really work.” She favored Cove with a bent smile. “I mean, this is Elizabeth we’re talking about here.”

Cove had to admit Jamie had a point there. Although not intentionally malicious, Elizabeth did have a tendency to overlook other peoples’ feelings when it came to doing what she wanted. “I guess you’re right about that.”

Jamie turned to face Cove properly as she strengthened her smile, feeling compelled to soften the awkward atmosphere she had created. “Don’t worry about it. Having a sibling is still pretty great anyway.” She playfully nudged him with her elbow. “And besides, I already have the most amazing best friend in the entire world by my side.”

Cove felt warmth fill his cheeks at that, and he nudged Jamie back softly in return with a shy smile of his own. “I feel the same way.”

Jamie relaxed a bit now that the mood had returned to something more jovial. “And in case you were wondering what it’s like to have two moms, it’s absolutely the best.”

Cove nodded. Even if Elizabeth could be a challenge to get along with at times, he had always known Noelani and Pamela to be friendly and encouraging, if a bit strict with their rules. The Leimomi family were overall probably the best neighbors he ever had, especially Jamie. “That’s… interesting. I think your family is cool.”

Jamie flashed Cove a grin, glad he agreed. It was impossible not to feel like she hit the jackpot when it came to the family that she ended up with. She couldn’t consider having better parents, or even a better sibling.

Of course, talking about parents brought Jamie’s mind back to the dinner she was going to have with Cove and his. Things were weird between the three of them in ways she didn’t know how to touch on.

The little surprise Cliff pulled at the beginning of summer had just made things even more strained. Things felt tense in a way that reminded Jamie of when Cove first moved to Sunset Bird.

That line of thought brought Jamie back to the first time she met Cliff and the deal he had offered her.

Jamie glanced at Cove out of the corner of her eye, noticing that he had gone back to looking at his fish. He probably never learned that ever happened. She doubted that Cliff ever mentioned it, and as for her…

It bothered her. The incident hung over her head for the past five years, popping up in her mind at awkward moments that left her feeling guilty despite the fact that she never took the twenty dollars Cliff had offered her.

When Jamie was little, she held the secret back from Cove for fear that he might decide not to be her friend anymore. He resented being pressured into becoming friends with Lizzie and Shiloh, so he never did. Granted, that was more because he just didn’t click with either of them than due to parental meddling, but still… In her eight-year-old mind, she was convinced that if Cove ever learned that Cliff wanted to pay her to be his friend, he would be so upset that he would never want to see her again.

That fear had disappeared over time as their relationship grew stronger, but that didn’t make the subject trouble her any less.

Jamie was keeping a secret from Cove - a big one. Usually, they told each other everything from silly jokes to their darkest thoughts. The only other thing she kept from him was just how deep her feelings were for him, and she already had a plan in motion for how she was going to tell him about that.

Much like with her crush, Jamie had sought out Lee’s advice about the incident with the twenty dollars. Her cousin had encouraged her to just tell Cove about it, if only because it bothered her for so long and wouldn’t stop haunting her.

Besides, Cove deserved to know that his dad did something like that behind his back. This incident with Kyra proved that Cliff was still pulling stunts like this, and not just on him.

Jamie knew that if the positions were reversed, she would want to know the truth about something as big as this, and as soon as possible.

It had been five years. They weren’t eight anymore. Telling Cove wouldn’t destroy their friendship.

She had to tell him.

Jamie placed her hands on the mattress to steady herself, drawing one back into her lap when she accidentally brushed it against Cove’s thigh. The unintended touch drew his gaze back to her - she could feel it even through her closed eyes. She took in a deep, steadying breath as she prepared herself.

The quiet that had settled between them was comfortable, Cove thought, finding it a sharp contrast to the uneasy atmosphere that had overtaken his home since the beginning of summer. Jamie’s presence made things easier on him - it always did.

That was why Cove didn’t expect to see Jamie looking so tense all of a sudden. He could tell that she was building herself up for something, but he couldn’t imagine what. When she opened her eyes and looked at him, her expression was solemn and tainted with nervousness.

“Cove,” Jamie said before pausing to wet her lips. “There’s something… I-I have something important to tell you. Something… something you’re not gonna like.”

The undercurrent of unease to the way Jamie spoke troubled Cove almost as much as what she said. He turned to give her his full attention, his knees bumping against hers in the process. “What is it?”

For a moment, Jamie could only stare into her best friend’s ocean blue eyes. Cove waited patiently for her to find her voice again, but the longer it took her, the greater the tension grew. She could see it in the way his brow furrowed and his lips curled down into a frown.

Please don’t get mad about this, Jamie thought desperately, feeling as though her stomach was tying itself in knots. She was already regretting her decision, but she had already said too much; she couldn’t just drop the topic as if it never happened. She had to take another deep breath to steady her nerves as they started to fray on her.

“It’s… um… it’s about way back when you moved here,” Jamie finally said, practically forcing the words out. “Before we met, I actually met your dad first and…” She started to falter as what she wanted to say started to fall apart in her mind, and she scrambled to right herself. “It was… your dad he… um, well…”

Jamie had to pause to gulp down another lungful of air, feeling as though there suddenly wasn’t enough around her.

Cove started bracing himself for whatever Jamie was struggling to tell him. The more she spoke, the more nervous she grew, and it was making him anxious as well, impressing upon him the seriousness of what she wanted to tell him.

Whatever this was, it was big, and he needed to be ready to deal with it.

“Your dad offered me twenty dollars to be friends with you.”

The words came out of Jamie in a rush then hung so heavily in the air between them that the already thick atmosphere turned suffocating.

Cove locked up. For a moment he couldn’t move, couldn’t even think. What Jamie told him made everything else disappear.

His dad… bribed Jamie to be his friend?

Jamie held her breath as she waited for Cove to respond. He sat still, so utterly still. He was no longer looking at her, but through her, as if she ceased to exist. His face, always so easy for her to read, was uncharacteristically devoid of expression.

Then Cove was moving. He said nothing as he rose from the bed before bolting from the room.

For a moment, Jamie froze up as well. Shock kept her rooted to the bed even after Cove disappeared around the corner.

This was… oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no!

Jamie tore after Cove once she could move again, panic giving her feet wings. “Cove!”

Cove didn’t hear Jamie. He didn’t even hear his parents as they bantered while setting the table, oblivious to what was happening. All he could hear was the blood rushing in his ears as he reached the living room.

For a moment, Cove could only stand there and glare at his father. His entire body was a tense coil, ready to spring. His hands faintly shook from how tightly he clenched them into fists at his sides.

Although Jamie caught up to Cove, she froze again just short of him. She didn’t need to see his face to know exactly what he was feeling - he was furious.

“Hey, what’s up?” Kyra asked as she finished setting down the last glass on the table. “When did you start running in the house?”

Cliff flashed Cove a wink as he wagged the spoons he carried at his son. “Are you that famished?”

The friendly banter didn’t register with Cove at all. There was room for nothing else inside his mind but the betrayal he felt towards his father that sent his entire body quaking with rage.

It had only just begun to hit Cliff and Kyra that something was wrong when Cove took a step forward.

“You paid Jamie to be friends with me?!” Cove shouted as he glared daggers straight into his father’s widening eyes.

Cliff froze, the spoons dropping from his hands onto the table with a clatter. He looked like a helpless deer caught in the headlights of a speeding semi.

Kyra recovered from the shock first, and rounded on her ex-husband. “Clifford!” she shouted as outrage overtook her as well. “Are you serious?!”

Out of reflex, Cliff turned his wide eyes to Kyra, blinking at her rapidly. “It was only one time!”

The blurted admission left Kyra reeling back, aghast.

Cliff raised his hands up in a defensive gesture, his eyes darting between his ex-wife and his son as they both stared him down. “I-it seemed like a good idea when it happened.”

As the shock waned, Kyra brought a hand over her eyes. Her jaw was set, her patience frayed, as anger slowly gave way to disappointment.

Cliff bowed his head as he rubbed the back of his neck, almost shrinking in on himself before their eyes. The fact that Kyra accepted that he would do something like this so easily was the most crushing part.

For all his anger, Cove had nothing else he could say to his father after his initial outburst. He could only stand there, fuming silently during his parents’ short exchange. The tension in his body was so strong it was painful, his eyebrows furrowed hard and his eyes trembling as he continued to glare at his father.

That was all Cliff had to say for himself? That he ‘only’ did it once? That it ‘seemed like a good idea’? What part of this could be considered ‘good’ at all?!

Jamie could only watch helplessly from the sidelines at the disaster she had created. She had been afraid that Cove might be angry or hurt to hear about the deal his dad offered to her, but he took it far worse than she ever imagined. That wasn’t even going into how badly Kyra or Cliff were feeling about it all.

Jamie felt so bad for Cove. She wished for the power to rewind time to five minutes ago so that she could choose to just keep her big mouth shut. Having a stupid secret about something she didn’t even agree to hanging over her head was nothing compared to the pain that she had inflicted on her best friend and his family.

Everything was horrible, and it was all her fault.

#Our Life Beginnings & Always #Our Life #ourlifeba #Cove Holden #Jamie Last #Jamie Leimomi #Cliff Holden #Kyra Preece #My Writing

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