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bonefall · 11 months ago

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Herb Guide: Deaf Warriors and Hearing Disabilities

UPDATE 1: Added more harshness to the lipreading section based on initial feedback; minor rewording of some lines!

A reference for Warrior Cats fans creating characters with hearing loss, blending human advice with cat biology, written for an in-universe perspective on living with and managing such disabilities.

AKA Bonefall casts Spell of Stop Being Weird About Snowkit on all amoebas in 500 mile radius

[ID: A headshot of three cats, a brown tabby with a shredded ear (Strikestone), a solid white cat with blue eyes (Stonewing), and a gray cat with a mane (Dovewing).]

In the five Clans, hearing loss is both one of the most common sensory disabilities, and one of the most intense to adapt to. Through any mix of simple infections, birth abnormalities, or even just getting older, any given Clan can expect at least 1 in 4 of its cats to have some form of hearing loss.

Hearing loss is any impaired ability to hear, defined as not being able to hear noises under 20 decibels. Deafness is "profound" hearing loss, which means their hearing STARTS at a noise that is 81 decibels (ex: motorcycle, middle-distant clap of thunder) or louder. Most deaf people can still hear slightly, but sound is "muffled" and they can only hear VERY loud noises.

Hearing loss = Any impaired ability to hear. Normal hearing is 20 DB or lower.

Hard of Hearing (HOH) = Mild to severe hearing loss; starts between 21 DB and 95 DB.

Deaf = Profound hearing loss at 95 DB or higher; a clap of thunder is a quiet whisper.

MOST hearing loss will affect one ear more strongly than the other, and the cat will be HOH. The vast majority of cats with a hearing disability will still be able to understand their Clanmates, if they're just spoken to louder and more clearly. Cats who are born deaf (congenital deafness), however, tend to have profound hearing loss which affects their ability to understand speech.

Cats rely on their hearing and sense of smell much more strongly than they do on their eyesight. With hearing that's 4x more sensitive than a human's and can differentiate between 1/10th of a pitch, a Clan's healer would recognize hearing loss as a disability long before humans would even notice a problem.

Since hearing loss starts with the high-pitch noises that prey makes, like squeaks and chirps, hearing loss is a major reason for a senior warrior to begin to consider retirement. However, with proper support and accommodation, ANY warrior could adapt to this disability; Especially cats born deaf and younger HOH warriors with lots of time to re-learn.

This guide covers;

Common Causes

Traits and Challenges of Hearing Loss

Communication: Signs, lipreading, and more

Unique Challenges Clan-by-Clan

Sources are linked in a separate post, here, and linked again at the very bottom!

(note: this guide doesn't cover devices of any kind, but one of many reasons why cochlear implants are controversial is because an implant will destroy that remaining hearing. They aren't hearing aids; hearing aids amplify sound. Aids and implants are two different things)

Common Causes

There are DOZENS of ways to destroy the incredibly sensitive ears of a cat. ANY infection or injury can lead to permanent damage. That can include,

Injury gone sour, from battle, hunting, accidents, etc

Concussion, or a hard enough blow to the ear

Ear Mites, especially if the cat can't stop scratching it

Swimming in cold or dirty river water

Fungal or bacterial infections

Allergies, which can lead to sinus infections. Even an infection in the mouth or throat can spread to the ear!

There doesn't even need to be an infection. Around the ages of 7 - 11, a senior warrior may begin to gradually lose their hearing. Sometimes, through genetic factors or degenerative disease within the ear, an even younger warrior will lose it for "no reason."

It just happens, and it's incredibly common. They will usually begin to notice it when they stop being able to hear and hunt small rodents, because hearing loss will start with high-pitched noises.

Healers can do very little about this, besides attempting to clean any wax out of the ear canal with flax oil and a dab (such as moss, wool, or cloth). There are SO many ways for it to happen and so little in the way of treatments, that it's practically inevitable.

The majority of hearing loss is from infection or disease, but the most predictable way to see deafness in the Clans is in kits born white with blue eyes. In fact, ALL pure white cats are more prone to being born deaf!

Pure white without blue eyes: 17% to 22%

White with a single blue eye: 40% (and usually on the side of the blue eye)

White with two blue eyes: 65% to 85%

In an afflicted kit, the inner ear will rapidly degenerate. They typically lose most of their hearing by their 4th day, and will only be able to faintly hear extremely loud noises.

Of course, there's also various other birth defects that can result in deaf and HOH kits, even if they aren't white with blue eyes. The ear canal and hearing organs can just not form correctly! Any kit could be born with hearing loss, and they can have any type!

If the loss came from injury or severe infection, chronic pain in the inner ear is also common. Nothing can be done about this besides painkillers such as poppy seeds. This condition is rare in born-deaf cats.

Most cats with hearing loss will also permanently hear a repetitive, single-note sound. For most it's a faint, tinny "ring," but others can hear hissing, crackling, or humming in high or low pitch.

At first, this constant noise can be distracting or even debilitating, preventing them from focusing or sleeping, until... you just get used to it.

There is no way to turn the noise off. It can get worse or better, but it's forever. Sleeping and not being stressed out will help, but over time, they typically learn to tune it out. Being reminded of it is usually annoying, just like when someone reminds you about manual breathing.

(We call this condition tinnitus. It is up to you what you would like your cats to call it, the same way they refer to pneumonia as greencough. Tinnitus is a LOT broader than this little snippet, but this is not a guide about tinnitus, this is about hearing loss)

So to summarize that,

There's a billiondy-million ways to damage one's hearing.

Losing your hearing from age or disease usually results in being hard of hearing (HOH) as opposed to deaf, and is likely to affect one ear more than the other.

It starts with high-pitched noises like rodent squeaks.

Cats born white with blue eyes have a massive chance of being born deaf; their inner ear degenerates.

But, any kit could be born with any type of hearing loss, not just deafness.

Most cats with hearing loss will hear a distracting, repetitive noise. They just learn to tune it out.

Traits and Challenges of Hearing Loss

Hearing impaired cats are LOUD.

Even warriors who have mild hearing loss will often end up speaking much louder so they can hear themselves, or not notice the sounds they're making as they shift around in their nests, scuffle sand at the dirtplace, or trample through crunchy leaf litter.

If one of their ears is better than the other, they'll usually try to stand with their "good side" facing any speakers or other sources of noise. They might appear to be constantly standing at an angle, with their head turned towards the sound. It might be so second nature that they don't realize they're doing it.

Plus, a cat with hearing loss in only one ear will lose their hearing's "distance perception," the ability to pinpoint a sound's location. EXACTLY like how losing the sight in one eye causes the loss of "depth perception," they will have difficulty telling how far away a noise actually is.

Warriors who lose their hearing later in life typically have years of experience in knowing how prey behaves and what sorts of actions make noise; but cats born deaf have to be taught this.

Instead, born-deaf cats tend to associate "sound" with "vibration." Echoes, rumbles, and the sensation of their own humming or laughter can feel very pleasurable. Their whiskers are so sensitive that they can even feel drafts of air from someone speaking in front of them! Because of that, cats with impaired hearing do better with low, rumbling "sounds" rather than high-pitched ones; even when they can't hear either. They can feel lower pitched noises.

(NOTE: Decibels are the measurement of volume, and Hertz are the measurement of pitch. These are different things, NOT interchangeable. HIGH pitch and LOW volume are lost first.)

This is why hunting is so difficult when cats begin to lose their hearing. Their sense of smell and sight can be perfectly intact, but a lot of how a cat hunts is in listening for delicate little sounds and balancing them in both ears to figure out prey's exact location. So, when a cat is learning to hunt without their hearing, they have to rely on their other senses and keep their whiskers low, dusting the ground with their chops and front paws, in hopes of their quarry making a vibration they can feel.

IMPORTANT: Don't forget that cats have carpal whiskers! They are short whiskers on the front paws of a cat, used primarily for "grappling" with other cats and struggling prey. They are less sensitive than facial whiskers, but still very useful for a hearing impaired warrior.

"Dusting," keeping the face low, is still more effective than relying entirely on "Sweeping" movements with the paws.

The younger the cat is, the more time they will have to practice and master this. Cats born deaf, who have never relied on hearing before, are usually better hunters than older warriors learning completely new techniques.

But. Clan cats aren't the only danger in the forest.

A warrior who is deaf or hard-of-hearing will not hear danger approaching, and is easy to sneak up on. Even if they keep themselves completely quiet, an intelligent fox or an enemy warrior can launch an unexpected attack on their unsuspecting target. The wilderness is dangerous, and it's not feasible to keep one's whiskers pressed to the ground at all times, even if vibrations did carry far enough to detect such danger before it's too late.

So, it would be recommended for warriors with hearing loss to not wander too far without a hearing Clanmate capable of alerting them to sounds.

They also will have a VERY difficult time acting as part of a "battalion," in large-scale battles.

In fights with dozens of entangled warriors, while they're focused on fighting the cat in front of them, they will have a hard time hearing commands. Even if well-trained in visual cues like tail signs, deaf and HOH warriors might fail to respond to yowled orders like, "RETREAT" or "SECURE THE ENTRANCE."

Even if the warrior isn't fully deaf, battles are loud and chaotic! It's very likely that such orders would get lost in the clamor of hissing and screeching cats, if the cat has any difficulties with hearing at all.

In summary,

Cats with hearing disabilities are loud.

Hearing loss in one ear will cause the loss of distance perception, and they will often stand at an angle with their good ear facing the noise.

If they were born deaf, they have to learn what makes noise.

Highly tactile, they tend to rely on whisker-sense to "replace" their hearing.

Keeping their facial whiskers low to feel for vibration, "dusting," is a very useful technique.

"Sweeping" with the carpal whiskers is also useful, but less so than "dusting."

They are in increased danger from things sneaking up on them, and shouldn't go anywhere unsafe without a buddy.

Following battle commands in large-scale battles will be difficult or nearly impossible, making them bad "team players."

Communication: Signing, lipreading, and more

(psst! @twiigbranch has a free-to-use version of pawspeak if you credit them!)

Since the majority of these cats lost their ability to hear later in life, most warriors with hearing loss will speak "normally." By "normally," that means they will talk the same way they did their whole lives, just louder so they can hear themselves better.

Over many years, they may begin to stop enunciating their words, 'slurring' their sentences, and their pitch may be a little off. Even then, it's rare that a Clanmate would be able to "tell" they have hearing loss just from their cadence.

But, meanwhile, cats who are born deaf will have a very complicated journey with speech.

It's PIVOTAL for the kit's development that the family and the Clan takes an interest in trying to communicate with them. Deaf children often become isolated from communities that don't seem to care about them, the same way any other alienated child would. This can result in trauma, lack of self-confidence, and behavioral issues.

Even if your project doesn't have Pawspeak (or doesn't have it yet!), kittens WILL find ways to communicate with their family and Clan. Sign language can evolve organically from home signs, unique gestures that will rise for a deaf child to speak with their family. BUT, the sooner they're introduced to a true sign language, the better they will be able to communicate.

Sign languages can also die naturally, simply fading away if the next few generations don't keep them alive. It's possible for the Clans to have gone through a few, over the years!

(Note: Sign languages are full languages, not just "physical versions" of a spoken one. American Sign Language and British Sign Language are from totally different families, even further from each other than English and Russian!)

It is also possible for cats born fully deaf, who have never heard words, to learn how to speak verbally... but, this takes a LOT more time and effort than using a sign language.

Teaching a deaf warrior how to say words is not quick, or easy, and is a very physical process. It involves a lot of dedicated practice time back-and-forth, with the apprentice placing their paw on their mentor's throat to feel their voice, and being coached on how to mimic the exact inflections of every word. It can be very repetitive, and very boring.

Even with lots of training, speakers born deaf have a noticeable "accent." They pronounce consonants better than they do vowels (aeiou), and often lack tone and inflection. Each warrior is an individual, and using a speaking voice is a skill some will be better at using than others.

Lipreading is very difficult. Most warriors born deaf will never learn how to do this, or even want to, as it takes an immense amount of time, effort, and tutoring. It will be more common for cats with more moderate hearing loss, especially if they lost their hearing later in life.

These are REQUIRED for a proper lip reading;

Clear view of the face. If the speaker is too far away, moving around, covers their mouth, stands in a dark place, or has their back turned, their lips can't be read. There are many ways that the view of the face could be obstructed.

Slow, clear speaking. If they're talking too quickly and mumbling their words, it will be extremely difficult to catch all of what they said. A better lip reader will be able to read faster.

Mental awareness. A cat who is tired to exhaustion, unable to focus, or not expecting to be spoken to will not be able to process what's being said. Lipreading is an action that takes brainpower.

MOST IMPORTANTLY: A single speaker, not overlapping with others. Lip reading is nearly useless during clanwide arguments. If there's tons of cats talking over each other, shouting out and interrupting, responding to unseen lips in the crowd, or even if an important speaker is just at a bad angle for the deaf warrior's line of sight to catch, they will not be able to catch everything.

Lipreading is also an action that takes focus. If the cat is tired, unable to concentrate, or isn't expecting to have to read lips, they won't be able to process what words the mouth was forming. It works best one-on-one, in clear lighting, looking straight ahead at the speaker... and even then, the BEST lipreader might only catch 40% to 50% of the words said.

So, it's truly reading. Interpretation. It isn't straightforward like language is. From, "I see a herd of deer, all of them are bucks" they might only catch, "...a... deer... of them... bucks." They will have to guess the meaning based on context!

(Look into a mirror. Quickly chant "Red right wrong" three times. Do you see how similar your lips look to form those words when you're not trying to clearly enunciate them? That's what lipreaders deal with.)

So, while there are other options, a sign language is absolutely the best choice if possible in your setting. Especially for cats who were deaf from birth, sign language is the ideal solution.

VERY IMPORTANT TIPS FOR WRITING A HEARING DISABILITY:

Please avoid them speaking with broken grammar, in third person, or with overly simplistic vocabulary, as if they are a toddler or a caveman. If a deaf cat is taught to speak, they will also learn grammar. BAD: "Examplefur go hunt. Me catch mouse good." OK: "I'm going hunting. I'm good at catching mice."

They will not suddenly "forget" how to speak if they lose their hearing, unless they have another condition such as brain injury.

Lip reading is inferior to signing.

They cannot perfectly catch every single word spoken in all conversations via lipreading, especially when the speaker isn't making an effort to include them, or it's during a disorganized group argument.

In ideal conditions, 30% to 40% of the words spoken will be picked up, and the reader will "fill in" the missing vocab with guesswork.

Teaching a deaf cat to speak verbally is a dedicated process, not something they easily "pick up."

Cats born deaf will almost never pick up lipreading, it is more common in milder forms of hearing loss.

Showing hearing clanmates making an effort to include hearing-impaired warriors, like doing translations or just making sure they understood everything, is massively appreciated.

A good culture around hearing loss is the best thing in the entire world for these cats. Support, respect, and acceptance are sincerely the most important factor in how well a hearing impaired warrior adapts with their disability.

So with that in mind, let's also explore the unique challenges in the terrains and culture of each Clan.

Unique Challenges Clan-by-Clan

Because of the nature of this disability, certain Clans are going to be more difficult for a hearing impaired warrior to function independently in, both in terms of environmental hazards and of culture.

Deaf and HOH warriors will not hear the sounds they're making if they step on noisy terrain or accidentally rustle nearby plants. Some enemies also rely more on stealth to attack their targets than others, and some territories will provide more places for prey and predators to hide. Water-related hazards will naturally cause there to be MORE disabled cats in some Clans more than others, which could mean that there will be less stigma and better community.

Environment means a lot to a cat with hearing loss!

RiverClan

Because this Clan is notorious for swimming in the river, they would have a massively higher rate of hearing loss (and scent loss) than other Clans; ESPECIALLY in late autumn and winter. This also means their healers would be MUCH more experienced with treating ear problems in general; but that's a subject for another guide!

(to answer a stray question before I eventually make that guide: RiverClan can make primitive earplugs out of beeswax to protect their hearing, but may need to trade with ThunderClan to acquire that.)

The important thing to note is that compared to other Clans, RiverClan has the highest rate of having HOH warriors. This means that there would be better support systems for hearing loss than in other Clans, and a cultural "bank" of techniques and knowledge to be shared.

They still have the same proportion of kittens born deaf compared to other Clans, but apprentices without hearing in RiverClan would have a bigger pool (heh!) of mentors who have experience with accommodating their disability.

Plus, you don't need to hear fish to catch them. While they'd still have issues hunting water voles and other wetland-loving rodents, fishers aren't at a significant disadvantage when it comes to providing food to the Clan.

Advantages--

High concentration of cats with similar disabilities provides community, and influences the broader culture to be more accommodating

Healers would have lots of experience with the injuries and illnesses that lead to hearing loss, leading to better treatment

Hearing is not necessary for catching fish, and thus has almost no bearing on how skilled a hunter would be.

Mentors would have better techniques for teaching deaf apprentices

Disadvantages--

Will not hear drowning cats. If you drop into that water you're on your own, bucko

Winter will be even harder than usual, when the river freezes over and fishing becomes more difficult.

Overall, RiverClan is THE best Clan for a deaf cat to be part of.

WindClan

With wide open spaces and lots of hills that offer a good vantage point, sight and vigilance is much more important for survival in a moorland than hearing. There's even an advantage to Pawspeak here; you can communicate from across the open moor without screaming out your location to all the prey!

On top of that, moorland has low-laying vegetation. It isn't a grassland, or filled with splashing water, or covered in crunchy leaf litter. There's not a lot of things TO accidentally make noise on, unless the warrior is trying to hide in a gorse or common heather bush, and WindClan is notorious for relying on speed over stealth anyway.

The one drawback to being a deaf moor-runner is that they will not hear baying hounds. Dogs are extremely common in moorland, either as sheep herders or as companions to human hunters shooting grouses. That said, the fact that hounds are the ONLY big predator they'll need to worry about immediately makes WindClan's moor safer than any woodland territory.

Badgers, boars, and foxes hate open spaces like moorland. It's just dogs that are a big concern, and hawks for smaller cats. There are very few "sneaky" predators in this area; most rely on speed.

So being a moor-runner is one of the best jobs that a warrior with hearing loss could have in the Clans... but the minute that they start to have problems listening to any orders, a tunneler should stop working underground immediately.

Deaf apprentices should be excused from their mandatory tunnel training, except to learn how to do evacuation drills.

There is no light underground. Even if they're capable of creating rushlights or are willing to sacrifice glowworms, that light will be dim at best, and could snuff out at any moment. Communication will become impossible with a deaf cat, and even moderate hearing loss will endanger any warrior who gets separated from their team.

If something as drastic as a cave-in or a flooding happens, they will be in extreme danger. They can't be properly warned unless they're pushed by a fellow digger, and they will not be able to notice anything that isn't rumbling. If they DO end up getting trapped under rubble, they will not hear a rescue party calling their name.

It's not just themselves they have to worry about, either. Not being able to warn or coordinate with their excavation team will put ALL of them in danger.

Advantages--

Moorland requires sharper eyes than ears to begin with.

Lack of ambush predators makes this territory particularly safe without hearing.

Quiet terrain makes sneaking less neccesary in the first place

Pawspeak is especially useful across wide distances

Disadvantages--

Hounds are still a massive danger; they could get very close before they're noticed, if they're upwind.

Will not receive a warning cry in case of any hawks or approaching predators.

Tunneling would be profoundly dangerous with a hearing disability; should be heavily discouraged.

Overall rating is that this is the second best Clan for a cat with hearing loss. RiverClan's sense of community still gives them the top seat imo, but if the attitudes of their Clanmates are good, WindClan's moor is an easy territory to adapt to.

ShadowClan

This one is going to depend on what version of ShadowClan the Erins feel like writing that day, or which one you've chosen for your own project. Do they live in a dry pine forest? Or a wetland?

If you're using the idea that ShadowClan lives in a dry pine forest, especially if your project exists in Britain where spruces, firs, and larches are non-native and thus the territory is a timber plantation, refer to the new growth section in ThunderClan below.

I do not abide by that idea, because Aengus the Prize Winning Hog did not emerge from a cranberry bog for me to disrespect him in this way <3 love ur local wetland <3

(quick note: a swamp is a wooded wetland, a marsh is an open wetland, a bog is acidic, and a fen is neutral/alkaline. Wetland is the general term here.)

Wetlands are rich with soggy ground, muck, and microbe-ridden stillwater. Though ShadowClan cats don't swim for fun, they would end up with more ear infections than most Clans through accidentally falling into the swamp. It's likely that they have the second-highest rate of hearing loss in the 5 Clans, but still significantly below RiverClan.

The lush, thick ferns and reeds provide lots of cover to the notoriously stealthy Clan, but to a warrior who can't hear, this terrain is loud and frustrating. The squish of mud under your paws and the rustle of undergrowth is very hard to adapt to if you can't hear it. ShadowClan's prey of birds, frogs, and water-rodents will respond to any accidental noises by fleeing, quickly, making hunting difficult.

Plus, ShadowClan doesn't rely on one, large, deep, stony body of water like RiverClan does, which seems to be sedimentary rock and open marsh all around. Predators are lurking everywhere in wooded swamps, and could sneak up on a warrior who can't hear them. Foxes, badgers, and boars are a danger in this territory.

All that said; ShadowClan still doesn't seem to rely on just rodents. They eat a lot of amphibians and reptiles, which are not hunted by sound. Most of the techniques they use to catch them can just be taught verbatim to a deaf apprentice, or continue to be used the same way by a warrior who has lost their hearing.

Advantages--

Concentration of warriors with hearing loss from falling into dirty water may provide community and support.

Has a good selection of prey that doesn't rely on listening to be hunted effectively.

Disadvantages--

Swamps, wooded wetlands, are dangerous and attract predators.

Lush foliage and soupy ground make moving quietly difficult for a deaf warrior; but not as difficult as leaf litter.

So, this Clan would be firmly middle-of-the-line in terms of its accessibility to a cat with hearing loss. It would depend a lot on how you plan to approach ShadowClan in your own project; such as if you plan to build out more campbound activities, see them as being social or antisocial with their Clanmates, and what kind of territory you choose for them to have.

SkyClan

As of the time of writing this guide in 2023, when the only decent description of SkyClan's new territory is from a single chapter of Squirrelflight's Hope, it's very difficult to figure out what sorts of terrain challenges a warrior with hearing loss would face at the lake.

Hopefully I can come back and update this later!

But it's most likely is that they have a diverse, varied territory, involving the climbing of steep hills and gorges. Even at the "gorge" territory, a lot of hunting would need to take place outside of the rocky parts of the ravine, in the sparse woodlands and countrysides nearby.

For hunting on sparse woodland, see the advice for ThunderClan. Most hunting in British countrysides is going to look very similar to WindClan's open fields, so refer up there for that.

Because of how close they are to humans, both in the Gorge and at the Lake, it's HIGHLY recommended that warriors with hearing loss avoid twolegplaces. ESPECIALLY towns. Between cars, crowds, and grabbing hands, these places are already dangerous (and sensory hell) for warriors with great hearing, but outright lethal for a hearing impaired cat who won't hear these things coming.

So while the majority of the Clan is jack-of-all-trades and regularly mixes up the particular terrain they hunt in, this is going to be harder for hearing impaired warriors. They have to invent brand new, unique techniques for ALL of these different environments, some of them more difficult than others. Because of that, it will naturally be easiest for a deaf warrior to "specialize" in a particular type of terrain.

This could result in some pretty intense feelings of alienation, as their hearing Clanmates regularly mix what sorts of places they tackle. Without even intending to, they could end up making the warrior feel very left out!

In terms of the culture though, SkyClan seems notoriously accommodating. Between the part-time-kittypet daylight warriors and the way they invented an entirely new mediator role for a cat who didn't enjoy hunting and fighting, it would likely be one of the BEST Clans in terms of supporting a hearing impaired warrior, even in spite of having a "standard" rate of hearing loss since their territory is not particularly wet.

So, it's very likely that they would WANT to fix the fact they've accidentally made their Clanmate excluded, and seek solutions that work for everyone. If any Clan besides RiverClan had a Pawspeak interpreter translating Leafstar's words, it would probably be these guys lmao

Advantages--

Varied terrain means there will be at least a few places that aren't too hard for them to adapt to

Sparse woods, open fields, and even gorges, the three most common terrain types, are at worst decent for a deaf cat to hunt in.

VERY accommodating culture, the absolute best outside of the Clans with a high hearing loss percentage.

Disadvantages--

Generalist training, where every warrior handles vastly different terrain types, will exponentially increase how much training a hearing-impaired warrior must learn.

Being unable to join with their Clanmates in hunting across the entire territory could feel isolating

Rating: Close to top tier, but variable. It's going to depend somewhat on the personality of the warrior. While SkyClan will likely make a big effort to include them, the reality of needing to learn several sets of parallel skills and the way they might feel like an "outsider" for specializing could cause extra distress. Especially for a warrior losing their hearing later in life.

ThunderClan

Because of their collaborative culture and hunting style, described as snobbish and bossy by other Clans, it's very likely that ThunderClan would struggle the most with a specific type of ableism. Since they value group cohesion, it follows they may force Assimilation onto a disabled warrior rather than Accommodation.

As mentioned earlier, Pawspeak is the best thing for the comfort of a deaf warrior... but it might not occur to this Clan to encourage the majority of the Clan to adapt to a minority of warriors.

But it gets worse. Forests are AWFUL terrain to hunt in if you can't hear. Imagine walking in a field with a bunch of invisible landmines, and if you step on one, it broadcasts your EXACT location.

It's difficult to tell if your mouse is running away because you crunched a leaf and made a sound... or because a bird in a tree SAW you and is now raising up an alarm cry. If you can't actually hear what the noise was that scared your lunch away, you might blame yourself for being clumsy as a fox barrels towards you!

When it comes to forests, there are significant differences between an old growth forest and a new growth forest. BOTH of them are going to be extremely difficult for a disabled warrior to adapt to, but old growth is harder.

OLD GROWTH

In both, ground litter is a challenge, but especially so in an old growth British forest. Natural forests there are primarily mixed oak, which drop twigs, leaves, and acorns all over the ground.

These areas are bountiful, productive, and brimming with life. Both in terms of prey and predators. The varied canopy of natural, mixed-age trees allows sunlight to filter through and create an "understorey," providing lots of food and cover to lots of different animals. Unfortunately, foliage is not a deaf warrior's friend.

As previously mentioned, a mix of areas for animals to hide in and a surrounding of rattling plant life is the worst possible combination for a cat who can't hear. Worse, hunting rodents depends massively on hearing them through the leaf litter, thanks to those high-pitched chirps and squeaks which are the first thing to vanish when a cat loses their hearing.

This would be so bad that it's likely ThunderClan "works" its youngest members much harder than its seniors, assigning apprentices and young warriors to significantly more hunting patrols. Since hearing loss is so common that it's practically inevitable, and the security of a Clan allows these wild cats to live to such old ages, it would be "common sense" to ThunderClan to structure things this way.

Old growth patches are practically food pantries for Clan cats, but hearing impaired warriors will have a HELLISH time trying to hunt in them.

NEW GROWTH

When a forest is new and all of the trees in a stand are about the same age, they create a uniform canopy. Like a continuous tent. This means they're so effective at blocking out sunlight that there's virtually no understorey.

No understorey means no food. Or very little food. But it also means no cover. And, usually, significantly less leaf litter. This is because in Britain, most of these types of forests are non-native conifers. Sitka spruce and douglas fir are the two biggest offenders-- and that's significant because nothing here has evolved to EAT the products of those trees.

In ThunderClan, Tallpines is an example of this, but this type of terrain could pop up anywhere that's seen massive destruction.

No understorey to feed prey, no products of the trees which native animals can eat, a silent floor covered in pine needles which offer no hiding places, almost chilling uniformity of the strange trees in evenly-spaced rows...

All of this to say that there's an irony here, that the hearing impaired warrior will be best at hunting in the most barren parts of the forest.

There's much less things to trip up on, or rustle. Prey can be plainly seen out in the open. Gray squirrels are the most significant prey that can utilize these areas, and they DO make a hearty meal for a Clan cat. Additionally, these areas are particularly silent because they're so barren, which might make them seem "creepy" to hearing warriors, but that wouldn't bother a deaf warrior one bit!

Advantages--

Cultural sentiment of "all for one; one for all" may lead to more dedication from the Clan as a whole in connecting to the hearing impaired cat

Which could be a blessing or a curse, depending on the individual warrior's feelings.

Ability to work efficiently in the most barren parts of the forest

Disadvantages--

Cultural emphasis on collaboration in group hunting likely leads to deaf cats being encouraged to adapt to the patrol rather than their own strengths.

May result in more emphasis on teaching lip reading and 'speech therapy,' rather than the adoption or implementation of Pawspeak.

Very difficult to stay quiet in a forest if you can't hear the crunch of leaf litter and twigs.

Lots of cover means random bullshit can spring out from any corner; abundance of ambush predators.

Cover also means there's a lot of places for prey to hide, and hearing can't be used to pinpoint the location.

Lots of rodent prey, which relies on hearing high-pitched noise to catch.

Rating: F MINUS, SEE ME AFTER CLASS. By FAR the worst Clan for a warrior with hearing loss to be part of, for both practical reasons, AND cultural reasons. Awful awful awful, absolutely abysmal, failing grade. Dark Souls for deaf cats

Though remember! This part of the guide is a suggestion. You do not need to include ableism in your own projects if you do not want to, and I hope with the information that you now have, you know how to better avoid it!

"Sources?"

Right this way~

#Deafness #Hearing Loss #Herb Guide #Clan Culture #warrior cats #deaf warriors #This is not BB but I feel like I should tag it just for the cover art #Since Stonewing and Dovewing don't have hearing loss in canon #BUT I SAY THEY DO #Better Bones AU...ish. kinda #Bonefall's Herb Guides

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ramsywasalittlelamb · 2 months ago

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all my dreams pass before my eyes, a curiosity

a Tim Drake-centric age regression fic, main characters bruce wayne and cassandra cain, minor dick grayson and barbara gordon, mentioned alfred pennyworth. Hurt/comfort. TW: wetting/accidents, diapers! Don’t like? Don’t read! (This is completely sfw, do not sexualize.) not proofread!

word count: 2,247 (one curse word!)

Even with communication devices and his cowl covering his ears, all he hears is ringing after the soul resonating booms of gunshots fired sliding by his head. He faintly recognizes the bullets hitting a wall behind him with a metallic clang, but it’s hard to concentrate. Did he get shot? What’s happening?

“—bin. Red Robin, report.” Batman’s deep voice cuts through the crowded silence in his head, he blinks the blurriness from his eyes only to see the people he was chasing are long gone. Tim opens his mouth to respond to Bruce, but only a crackle comes out.

“Baby Bird, I’m gonna need more than a noise to know that you’re okay.” Nightwing fills in as Tim’s eyes drift down to his body in a lousy scan to make sure he wasn’t shot, which thankfully he came out of that clean. “Mm..” He tries, his mouth not wanting to cooperate with his thoughts. He’s fine— Well, not fine, but he’s unscathed, which is lucky considering.

He feels stuck in place, nothing in his body responding the way he wants, and thoughts are getting harder to form, like a brain fog. Did he get drugged? Is he dying?

“I’m coming.” Batgirl states, stomping down some of Tim’s anxiety that swells in his chest. He feels too vulnerable to be out here right now, especially in this suit that admittedly just feels way too heavy for his body right now.

“ETA is 15 minutes, Red.” Oracle speaks with a static-y click in his ears following. “We’re on a private line now, Red. I have eyes on you, and you don’t look great. Are you sure you’re okay?” The concern in her voice makes Tim a bit antsy, but he shrugs because there’s no use in lying when there’s help being sent your way already.

Oracle hums. “I’ll stay on with you until Batgirl gets.. there…” She trails off, speedy typing on her keyboard sounds out quietly. “Ori?” Tim says anxiously as he leans back against the metal wall, legs weakening with a wobble as he slides down till he’s sat on the damp concrete.

“I’m here, Baby bird.” Baby bird? He… He isn’t…

Oh…

“7 minutes, bird. You’re okay, I’m still here.” Her voice reassures him and quells the anxiety he didn’t realize was building up. That explains a lot. But… why? Why is he regressed? The.. the gunshots, he remembers the gunshots, and chasing after some guys for… something.

“3 minutes, Red. You’re doing fantastic.” He’s not sure what he’s doing fantastic at, but he appreciates it. A cold wind sweeps across the alley he sits in, running over his cheeks and nipping at them until the skin is red. A chill runs down his spine as he recognizes a different icy feeling across his lap.

Oracle sucks in a breath as Tim looks down and sees that his suit pants are wet. Not damp, wet. Did he.. Did he actually have a fucking accident? A breath gets caught in his throat at the realization as a motorcycle's headlamp lights up the alleyway with a roaring engine that quiets as it rolls in, he can’t seem to drag his eyes away from the shiny fabric to look at the potential danger.

“It’s just Batgirl, you did such a good job, birdie. Such a great job. Let her help you back to the cave.” Oracle says to him in a gentle commanding tone. A black gloved hand tears his eyes away to see Cass in her suit, but rid of the full face mask. “We can go home now.” She says softly with a smile, to which Tim takes her hand with his own shaky one. The vulnerable situation he put himself in leaves him in a sort of shock of what could’ve happened, but Cass is here now. He’s safe.

“You are safe.” She hums as she helps him onto the bike, he cringes as his pants stick to his skin in a sickening way as he sits down, but he’s quickly distracted by Cass pulling back his cowl and replacing it with a helmet. “You did a good job, I promise. Nobody is upset at you.” She says as she secures the helmet on his head.

He ingests the words as she pulls on her mask and hops on the bike in front of him, wrapping his arms around her midsection before pulling out of the alleyway carefully. Tim watches as she grips at the handlebars anxiously, wanting to zoom off and get him home faster, he assumes.

Nobody is upset with him though? He almost got shot because his brain short circuited. He could’ve gotten seriously injured or- or a lot worse, those people could have ripped off his mask and reveal practically everything because of this, this— mistake.

He laid his helmeted cheek on Cass’s back, looking at the bright lights of cars and the city passing by in blurs, though it doesn’t distract him from the uncomfortable reality of his wet pants as much as he’d hoped. He’s ecstatic to be going home and getting changed out of these, but he’s not so ecstatic to be seeing people in the cave when he’s like this. He really doesn’t care to be seen by anybody right now, to be frank.

Tim sniffles at the thought of Bruce or Dick finding out, their disappointed looks are already etched into his brain, he can practically hear them talking about how to make Tim stop regressing to make sure this doesn’t happen again. Maybe they won’t have to find out though.

They pull into the cave slowly, coming to a stop with a click of the engine. Cass has already pulled her mask back by the time Tim summons the courage to sit up, wiping the tears that corralled at his waterline once Cass removes his helmet. The familiar coldness of the cave brings displeasure instead of its usual adrenaline rush, looking around with unease to gauge who all was present.

Alfred was putting some clothes in a warming bin, (a request by Stephanie when she came back to the cave for a debriefing after fighting with freeze during a cold rainy night. It proved to be a very loved addition with everyone.) and Bruce was at the computer, tabs open on the others out right now.

Cass taps his cheekbone, tugging his drifting attention to her. “I need to shower, do you want help cleaning?” She asks as if this isn’t a one in a million scenario for Tim, the casualness throws him off guard a bit. “Uh,” He stumbles over his words, “maybe..?”

She hums, nodding as he unlatches his cape from his shoulders, putting it with the helmet she placed on the vehicle workbench. “Alfred or Bruce?” And wasn’t that just a question that stumps Tim. He wishes nobody was an option, but still got help in some way. He really cannot do this himself, but he really does not want Bruce or Alfred to help him.

“Bruce is nice with this.” Cassandra says as she twirls a long strand of his hair between her fingers, sensing his inner turmoil and frustration. “He’s slow and careful. Alfred is quick, well experienced.” She adds.

“B..ruce.” He sounds out carefully. Being cared for with gentleness sounds a little bit better right now, though being done with this quicker sounds appealing too considering his itchy he feels.

The man perks up and turns in his seat, Cass nodding with a gentle smile down at Tim, pressing a kiss to his hairline before turning to Bruce with a look he can’t quite make out, but Bruce seems to know as he gives a reassuring nod to her as she heads off to the showers.

“Oh, bud.” Bruce starts quietly, standing in front of Tim to where he has to crane his head back to see his face. “I’m sorry for the night you’ve had.” He hums in a gentle tone, running a hand through Tim’s hair. He leans into the touch and words.

His emotions hit the lid and overspill. Anxiety and paranoia of people’s reaction clouded his judgment so much that he couldn’t believe that Bruce was real right now. So much has happened tonight, it’s been so scary and new— it’s too much for his body to contain.

Tears cascade down his cheeks with a soft sob, the fuzziness of regression consuming entirely with the knowledge that he’s safe. Bruce clicks his tongue and picks up Tim with ease, even as he whines at the discomfort of his pants still sticking. “I’m sorry, you’re okay now. We’ll get you cleaned up and then you can be sleeping with Aurora, yeah?”

Tim nods with a hiccup, squirming in Bruce’s hold at just how uncomfortable the suit is now. How did he wear this for so long? Thankfully, Bruce is quick and was able to reach the upstairs bathroom since the cave had no comfortable tubs. Tim gets set down on his feet with a whine that Bruce quickly quells by continuing to hold his hand as he begins to fill the bath.

Bruce helps and instructs Tim on every step of undressing, making sure he was okay through every part, then helping him ease into the warm water after tossing the dirty suit to the corner of the room— a problem for future Bruce.

Tim washes himself off while Bruce gets his hair, rinsing it carefully so as to not get soap or water in his eyes. They would’ve gone more eccentric with the bath, but it was more urgent and necessary than just a regular cleaning.

“Boo?” Tim murmurs as Bruce lifts him out of the growing cold water, wrapping a fluffy and warmed towel around him then setting him on the edge of the bathtub while it drains. “Yeah sweetheart?” Bruce hums as he grabs another towel, squeezing Tim’s dripping locks of hair to track less of a mess around.

“Am.. Am I gonna hav’ta wear..” He loses the word and pats his hip with a hand, to which Bruce chuckles. “I’d rather be safer than sorry tonight, but it’s your call, bud.”

Tim nods, wearing a diaper doesn't sound bad— it never has, but he’s never needed one before. It sounds more comforting than anything to know there wouldn’t be a repeat of tonight in the morning, too.

“Alright, bud.” Bruce says as he brushes out Tim’s half dried hair, then picking him up once it’s deemed good enough to sleep with. He carries Tim to his bedroom, laying him on the bed. Tim makes a fuss at the loss of Bruce’s presence, but he returns quicker than the flash, this time with a few things in hand.

Once again, Tim’s guided through everything that Bruce is doing, but now he’s tired, and he wants to be with Aurora and Bruce and Dick and— Cass! Just as Bruce is taping up the diaper, Cass comes in with a familiar white plush.

“‘Rora!” He says giddily, reaching out for his dragon friend to whom Cass passes over wordlessly, beginning to help Bruce dress and ready Tim for bed. With Aurora in his hands, her soft fur running over his skin, and her glittery wings reflecting the soft yellow glow of the bedroom lamps, everything becomes quiet.

His eyes feel heavy as Aurora’s wide black eyes stare down at him. She probably feels sleepy too, he thinks. Bruce grabs at one of his hands gently, prying it away from Aurora’s stuffed body to reach his arm through a sleeve, then doing the same with the other before popping his head through the shirt hole.

“There’s a little birdie!” Bruce gleams down at Tim who hides bashfully behind Aurora at the attention, Cass pulls socks onto his feet so he doesn’t get cold during the night.

“Goodnight, baby bird. Sleep well.” She says as she rounds the bed, leaning over to press a kiss to the tip of his nose with a boop from her finger, then saying her farewell to Bruce before leaving the room with a soft close of the door.

Bruce sighs and stretches his back once Tim is all set for bed— brushing his teeth right now seems a bit troublesome, not that he encourages skipping it, but they’re both very tired, and he doubts Tim would be up for such an activity. He places his hands underneath Tim’s arms to adjust where the boy lays, placing his head on a plush pillow and folding the gentle fabrics of his covers back, then laying them atop of Tim.

Bruce says something, but Tim’s trying his hardest to stay awake, so he can’t focus on the words. He flops over to lay on his stomach rather than his back, squirming around at the new feeling of a diaper on. Not an unwelcome feeling, just different.

“Boo…” Tim murmurs sleepily with his face squished against the pillow, holding Aurora close underneath his arm, he feels a body lay beside him, running a hand through his hair. “I’m right here, you and Aurora can sleep.” Bruce hums above him, nails scratching against his scalp in a way that makes him feel like purring.

He wants to thank Bruce, tell him he loves him, tell Bruce that he appreciates everything he’s done tonight, but.. it’s too hard to form that into words right now.

Tim supposes that’s just something for him to do in the morning.

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dorianbrightmusic · 11 months ago

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a primer for all my mutuals watching me go through a Persona 2 hyperfixation

basically, so y'all understand what these memes/headcanons/fanarts/liveblogs of me weeping are, i present a terrible explanation of the Persona 2 duology for all those of you who are confused. Spoilers ahead.

-There are two games that constitute Persona 2: The first is Innocent Sin, and that timeline gets yeeted at the end in favour of the second game, Eternal Punishment

-The protagonist of IS is Tatsuya Suou. He's a (canonically!) bisexual mess. He's great with swords and great with dudes, but otherwise horrible at communication. He's autistic motorcycle man. He's the only one whose memory is not nuked by the timeline reset, and it destroys him internally

-In both games: rumours are becoming reality. Ways such rumours get utilised: A tyrannical school principal reverses his male pattern baldness; one guy can recite pi to the hundredth thousandth place; Hitler is alive and wearing sunglasses;

-Tatsuya has childhood friends in IS. They have amnesia because trauma, but then remember because more trauma. These friends include: Maya Amano (see below); a white girl who punches dudes; THE GREAT MICHEL, ROCKSTAR AND UNDERPANTS GANG LEADER; and one (1) traumatised gay murderer who's also the resident astrology bitch

-(The party also includes Yukino, a sane lesbian)

-There is a gay romance option between Tatsuya and Astrology Bitch, and you are a coward if you don't select it

-Astrology Bitch is a clown for half of IS. Specifically, a Tumblr sexyman murder clown.

-The protagonist of EP is Maya Amano. She wears a jacket with lovehearts sewn over each breast, and at the end of IS, she gets stabbed with the lance that pierced Jesus, and dies

-Maya dying sets off an apocalypse, destroying the world. To reverse the apocalypse, childhood friends petition the local god to yeet this timeline in favour of one where they never met (that being the world of EP). If any of them remember that they know each other, then the new timeline is at risk of being destroyed (that being the plot of EP)

-Tatsuya, autistic motorcycle man, loves his friends too much. As a result, he remembers the old timeline, and now, it's up to New People to prevent the EP timeline hurtling into an apocalypse

-New People feature: Maya Amano (not dead), Ulala 'I sell lingerie and punch dudes' Serizawa, two (2) Copyright Free Gendo Ikaris, and a character from the original Persona (yes, the one where there's a Japanese character who got made black in the botched localisation. Sorry, Masao/Mark)

-Copyright Free Gendo Ikari #1 is Katsuya Suou. He's Autistic Motorcycle Man's older brother, has a stick up his arse (to quote one fic), and acts nothing like Gendo – just looks like him on a budget. He has a cat allergy. He's a homicide detective. He wanted to be a pastry chef. (My heart is in tiny pieces—)

-Copyright Free Gendo Ikari #2 is Baofu. He looks nothing like Gendo, but is as smug and as scheming.

-Both Copyright Free Gendos wear sunglasses at night. They hate each other btw

-EP also features Anna Yoshizawa, a sane lesbian, and Noriko, an insane lesbian

-Tatsuya's memories get yeeted at the end of EP, and it's the only case of amnesia in media where it actually feels like a well-earned relief, rather than a cheap plot device

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gaylordscooter · 7 months ago

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Log of the Multiverse: Hearts

So recently i was able to make my own universe-hopping device by studying the code of Ink's portals. but i didn't want to make some complicated gun that makes portals (a gun that makes portals? i'm no aperture science)

so instead i modified a motorcycle (that i did not steal) that's able to tear holes small enough to heal by itself and to hop between universes once i reach a certain speed. Cons of this. i need to reach a certain speed to tear said hole. Pros, ive been able to get out of a universe in as small of a space as twenty feet. plus it's really handy for getting away from things.

While getting the hang of it, i found this Mettaton at the dump of the universe's Waterfall. The guy was SCRAP METAL when i found him. I thought he was dead, honestly. I nearly jumped out of my metaphorical skin when i heard him speak.

He told me he was in the wrong world and needed help getting out of this "horrifically hostile world". Now usually i'd check in with Ink before yoinking someone from a universe buuuut this guy was very persuasive. and also was in the process of dying

I call him "Hearts" because his breastplate's the shape of a heart. im very creative, i know (at least i didn't name him PINK because his skin's PINK. Unlike SOMEBODY who names people that way) (im not even blue. i wear more of a blue-green)

For now, he crashes at Dream's our communal home in the Doodlesphere. because he didn't like the idea of living at the hub due to the amount of people there.

I've done as good as a job as i could to repair him. thankfully i've gotten a lot of pointers from Alphys to improve my engineering skills.

So I guess, this guy's an outcode like me. I haven't seen many non-sans outcodes. Only two i can think of at the top of my head are XChara and In. Scratch that I can only think of one. Unless you can count Everyone in the hub, but their case is different in my opinion because most of them stay in that universe.

He seems to be from some kind of fell-esque universe with his two pairs of arms and eyes. Ink says im smitten for him, don't believe his lies.

It's Mettaton, everyone thinks he's hot.

Anyway, he has a VERY high LV. So i'm always prepared to dodge juuust in case he decides to attack me, but I doubt he will because i'm basically his repair-man now. He's also very interested in joining me on my trips to other universes. I just make sure he doesn't mess with anything.

Oh this reminds me, he's saved me on numerous occasions. Like one time when I was collecting some echo flowers from Waterfall in an Underfell universe he stopped a boulder from hitting me it was pretty hot. He's pretty strong. It's almost like he's my bodyguard or something

So yeah, Hearts. He's pretty cute. i mean nice. he's nice. even though he's actually very rude and snarky and has probably Definitely killed a lot of people to get to level 12 (that's probably not all from self-defense)

#blue's (totally not diary) log

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rogersideup · 2 years ago

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Late Night Talking

Mrs. Rogers

Series Masterlist

Next: The Smiley Sticker

Word Count: 7,843

Summary: Your relationship with the Avengers was a little more than one would call mysterious. Though you were officially appointed to the team, Tony and Pepper were the only ones who knew your real name and have met you in real life. You lived and operated in the compound, the same place most of the team lived yet somehow and some way none of them have ever even bumped into you in common areas... or so they thought.

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI.

"Hey pretty baby" Your sultry voice of the team's eyes away from battle soothed Steve's mind as it filled his communication device. "Did you miss me?"

He couldn't help the smile on his face, regardless of being mid battle. You could hear the rumble of his motorcycle engine followed by a few gunfire shots, and you watched the green dot of his location on your monitor screen move quickly, little red dots slacking on his trail.

"Oh I'm always missing you, sweet cheeks. I was starting to wonder when you'd show up to save the day" Steve spoke back, still focused on dodging bullets coming from behind him.

"I'm going to start by saving your life. Take a right" You told him.

He saw a clearing in the dense trees and the path he was on split into two, so he cut his wheel and and took a hard turn. Just as his back wheel made it to the new path, an explosion sounded exactly where he would've been.

"What would I ever do without you?" He asked, really thankful you caught something he didn't.

"Can't have you dying on me yet, Love. Gotta keep you alive long enough to meet you at least once" Your giggle through comms warmed his soul. "Keep riding that path straight through, you'll cross with Nat in about a quarter mile then you guys can make a run for the Jet together"

Your relationship with the Avengers was a little more than one would call mysterious. Though you were officially appointed to the team, Tony and Pepper were the only ones who knew your real name and have met you in real life.

You lived and operated in the compound, the same place most of the team lived yet somehow and some way none of them have ever even bumped into you in common areas... or so they thought. Even if they did they would have no way of knowing other than recognizing your anonymous voice.

Generally, you got along well with all of them, and your skills in hacking into enemy's intelligence saved all of their lives more times than you could count. Though they all tried to make you feel welcome and involved in their social bubble, you never accepted the invites to any post work occasions. Steve desperately wished you would.

The two of you got along like two peas in a pod. With your voice in his ear you guys would rip through missions easy-peasy. The constant banter and persistent flirtatious nicknames started through all of the Avengers listening to how you spoke to each other on comms. All of them insisted that you interacted like a married couple so frequently that you started flirting with Steve as a joke. That joke stuck so well that the only time you guys wouldn't speak to each other with pet names or romantic gestures was in serious situations.

"In order to meet me, you gotta show up" Steve told you.

"Babe, if I ever saw you in real life I think your gorgeousness would melt me into a puddle right on the spot. I gotta keep myself alive too" You were almost too quick and witty for Steve to keep up with, sometimes you even had to give him a few extra moments to formulate a response.

"I'll mop you off the floor?" He offered.

"Then who's going to be around to keep you alive?"

"This is a really slippery slope" He smiled.

He passed by Nat on the bike, so she cut in behind him and followed him straight through.

"Widow is riding your ass, she's just like me" You joked.

"Harharhar" Steve rolled his eyes. "If you want a piece of my ass, you know where I live"

"Wow, you wanna meet me so bad you're offering up America's ass? I feel so special"

"You should, honey, It's reserved just for you."

"Your Jet reservations expire in about a minute. Lay heavy on that pedal for me, Love" Right as you instructed, his little green dot started moving faster. Nat sped up to keep up with him.

"We'll make I-"

"Nuh uh. Dont focus on me, focus on getting on getting out of there safely"

"Awwww, you worried about me?"

"It's kind've my job" You could hear the smile in his voice.

"Almost there"

There was about a minute of nothing but the sound of heavy breathing and motorcycle engines, you watched them move closer and closer as the metaphorical clock counted down.

"And we're on" He informed you, and his location confirmed his statement.

"You got me holding my breath over here, Rogers" You let out a sigh of relief now that you've accomplished your mission of getting all of them rounded up for a speedy escape.

"Couldn't have done it without you, Mrs. Rogers. Thank you" He really was constantly grateful for your guidance.

"Wish you could see him, Smiles. Steve's cheeks are pink" Tony informed you once all of their comms connected into the same channel since they were all in range.

Smiles was the nickname Tony used for you and it kind've just stuck with the team. They could constantly hear the smile in your voice as you spoke to them through the channels, and Tony confirmed that's just how you was in real life too. Constant toothy smiles.

"You know I just ran like 17 miles, right?" Steve rolled his eyes at Tony.

"They weren't pink 'till she called you Love" Nat cut in earning an eruption of giggles from all the Avengers.

"You should've seen my face when he called me Mrs. Rogers. I think i'm giving red roses a run for their money" You added to bare some of Steve's burden.

"Red looks great with your complexion, sweetheart" Tony complemented.

"How about white and blue?" Steve asked Tony, earning her glorious laugh right in all their ears.

"That was a good one." You gave Steve credit where it was due. "Alrighty guys, I gotta go. You all did great. Get home safe, rest up. Love you all"

A variety of different goodbyes and love you's flooded your ears.

"Still coming over for dinner later?" Tony asked. Sometimes he liked to show off that he was the only one who got to know you in real life, so giving them breadcrumbs and hints of your friendship always had them all asking a flood of questions about what you were like in person that he would always refuse to answer.

"Depends, is Pepper going to be there?"

"Yes"

"Then yes. Tones, I'll see you at six. Everyone else, I'll smell ya later." You disconnected the call and ripped the headset off your ears before letting your head fall backwards to take some long, deep breaths. No matter how long you worked this very position, your sever anxiety never let up.

When Tony first recruited you for a position on the Avengers, your immediate response was absolutely not. Never in a million years. But after almost a full year of persistence and boarder-line harassment from Tony, you explained why you could never be an Avenger.

Every ounce of skill you had was clouded by huge, thick fog banks of anxiety. Though most of it was managed through therapy and medication, it still lingered and created an excess amount of discomfort.

The high stakes and celebrity status that came along with being an Avenger would do nothing but heighten that. It would simply kindle the flame and reverse all the work you did to make yourself functional on a daily basis.

Fortunately for you, Tony knew first hand what it was like to have that looming grey cloud. So, he made accommodations.

Private workspaces, anonymity from your colleagues, an apartment in the compound away from the Avengers private living quarters.

After lots of reassurance, you accepted.

And now with over a year and a half under your belt,you were just now starting to feel guilty for your lack of presence around the people you absolutely loved talking to.

You so badly wished that she could join Wanda and Nat for Sunday morning brunch, or go out for flights with Sam. But the worst of all, you felt like your heart was being ripped out every time Steve practically begged to meet you.

Every time you thought you were making progress towards introducing yourself to them in person, you would see one of them in passing and immediately feel a weight in your chest and your head would spin.

At this point, you felt like they all had romanticized your anonymity so much that you would be nothing but a disappointment to them. In their heads, they probably imagined a supermodel in a spandex suit and a cape. Maybe perfectly outgoing with a flirty demeanor, an extrovert who only denied time with them for lack of interest.

In your mind, you didn't fit the bill of what an Avenger typically was. When it came down to it, you were a sensitive, introverted soul. Most of your time away from work was spent on whatever special interest would provide a creative outlet, and binging movies with your friend who worked in the compound IT department. Though you were physically strong and had stamina, you certainly didn't have the superhero physique. Soft and squishy around the edges was a good compromise for yourself, you could never imagine devoting her whole life to maintaining a level of fitness and diet that took away from living you day to day life how you wanted.

Taking all of that into consideration, you didn't want to feel like who you really were would let them down. You knew that they had created a grand conspiracy about what you might've looked like and who you might've been just by you voice alone. It scared the shit out of you.

Although later that night Tony and pepper reassured you over dinner and a few bottles of wine that none of them suspected you at all, you couldn't help but to feel like they all knew. Every walk down the hallway, trip down the stairwell, and polite smile in the lobby was an interaction closer to becoming a suspect in the grand conspiracy of the mystery Avenger.

The wine flowing through your veins certain didn't help as you got dropped off from dinner at Tony's and had to make the walk through the compound to get to your apartment.

Your phone rang in your back pocket, and Tony's name popped up.

"Can't get enough of me, huh?" You answered the phone in a state of giggly drunkenness.

"You wish. I forgot to tell you about the thing tomorrow night"

“The thing?" You questioned while pressing the elevator call button. "Pretty non-descriptive for a genius, don'tcha think?"

"I'm starting to regret even telling you about the thing now." Tony stated, you could almost hear him rolling his eyes. The elevator doors opened as you laughed as his statement. Thing. What a funny word. "You still with me? Did I give you too much to drink?"

"Oh yeah" you stumbled into the elevator, blissfully ignorant of the human already inside. "I can barely even handle one glass let alone the 3 refills I caught you pouring when you thought I wasn't looking. Hey, I'm in the elevator I might lose service. "

"Cool, let me make this quick. Tomorrow night, private Avengers party in the compound. You're going. If anyone asks, you're a systems analyst technician. 8 o'clock, wear your prettiest dress. See you then, bring your friend from IT!"

"Tony! What? I'm not going to that thing!" You tried telling him but you were cut off by beeping, letting you know the call had failed.

"Floor?" A strong voice asked beside you.

You jumped a mile high and clutched your hand to your chest to try and keep your heart from running away.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you" The voice apologized.

Your drunken brain barely allowed you to see straight, but when you looked up at the man just to identify him as Steve, your heart only ran away quicker and dropped straight into the pit of your stomach.

Suddenly, you felt like you were going to puke. But also, you were right. His extremely good looks had you melting into a puddle.

Self consciousness took over as you realized how you were dressed. Leggings, a big cozy sweater, sneakers, and hair in a ponytail with not a speck of makeup on your face. After a long mission, casual dinner at Tony's was tradition. You both didn't ever want to worry about wearing uncomfortable socially acceptable clothes after hours of stress. You didn't deserve to be in the presence of Steve in an outfit like this.

"I'm s-sorry" Your anxious stutter got in the way of even acting like you were fine. "Seven please"

He gave a little nod before pushing the button with a number seven on it, meanwhile you prayed that it was the end of your interaction.

You had only ever seen him in quick, few seconds long intervals. Sometimes you guys passed each other on the way to your private office, and other times you would see him walking in and out of the building while you sat at your favorite coffee shop right next door, but you had never gotten close enough to notice the small details.

The way his voice sounded straight from the source instead of muffled through the comms, his real height, the smell of his cologne, his strong energy.

Holy shit. Holy shit. Holy shit.

"I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but Tony as in Stark?" He questioned with an obvious friendly demeanor.

While your mind was on overdrive, his was only thinking about how the woman in the elevator with him was one of the most beautiful people he's ever seen, and he definitely wasn't going to let you get away without at least some small talk so he could make an impression.

"That's the one" You spoke quietly and kept looking down at the floor, praying he wouldn't recognize your voice.

"And he wanted you to go to a thing?" Steve kept pressing.

You so badly wished that this conversation was happening over the comms, so you could tell him to stop talking to strangers in the elevators. Maybe even smooth talk him, butter him up by calling him your baby and that his habit of being overly friendly was kind've creepy.

"Yeah, tomorrow night" You nodded. Even in your terribly anxious state, you still drunkenly laughed at the word thing.

But the pit in your stomach grew to be a lump in your throat. You didn't know if you needed more alcohol or less. Either way, you were holding back tears and vomit at this point.

"Oh nice! The Avengers party! Why aren't you going?"

This man really didn't know how to read body language, huh?

“Just busy at work, I'm sure you know how that is. Plus I'm not really much of a social butterfly" You explained.

"Stark will work you to the bone if you don't step away. Maybe going to the party and putting yourself out there can help with both those things" Steve shrugged.

Things. Why did everyone keep using that word? And why did it get funnier every time?

"What's so funny over there?" He asked with a lopsided smile.

Oh shit. Were you laughing out loud?

"Sorry- nothing. It's just........ the word thing." You explained, hoping that this elevator ride from hell would end soon.

Luckily for you, they came to a stop and the doors opened again for you to get off. You practically ran out but Steve held the door open with his forearm.

"It's a great word" He agreed. "So, will I see you tomorrow night?"

"Probably not" You shook her head and he gave you a fake hurt expression, dramatically clutching his chest.

"Right, cause you're going too busy at your job as a..."

"Systems analyst technician" thanks Tony.

"Got it. Steve Rogers by the way" He extended his hand to shake yours.

Another invasive giggle took over at the thought of him introducing himself to you. This was the same man calling you Mrs. Rogers but had no clue.

You reached out a shook his hand in a giggly anxious daze.

"Kind've put that one together. I'm-" just as you were about to say your name, you had to stop and think about it. "Drunk. Very, drunk"

He raised an eyebrow, obviously amused by the confession.

"Nice to meet you, Drunk. Hopefully you'll reconsider your choice and join us at the thing tomorrow" he smiled as the doors closed leaving you alone in the hallway.

Your artificial smile dropped as you raced back to your apartment. With shaky hands and nausea running rampant, you unlocked the door and found solace in the solitude of your own private space and your grey and white cat, Eeyore.

Your brain buzzed calculating all the possible outcomes of this situation. The only thing you could think of doing was calling Tony again.

It only rang once before he picked up.

"Seems like you’re obsessed with me" His voice did little to calm you down.

"Anthony Edward I swear to god-" you threatened.

"Woah there, Frowns. What's got your 'tude in a twist?"

"Remember that little elevator ride I was telling you about?"

"So what? You're stuck? Press the emergency call button, not me. You know, you really suck at basic survival skills" Tony said as if it was a matter of fact.

"No. You know who was in the elevator? Rogers" Your voice called attention to every ounce of panic you were feeling.

"No shit" You could hear Tony's amusement through the line. "Finally met your husband, he's a handsome guy isn't he? How red did he turn when he realized who you were?"

"This isn't funny! He didn't. At least I don't think he did. I hope he didn't, I'm panicking over here metal man"

"Oh he's more of an idiot than I thought" Tony mused.

"He kept asking me questions, why does he ask so many questions?"

"It's just what he does"

"He's going to figure it out, Tony. I can't go to that party tomorrow. He heard us talking on the phone, he knows I know you, he knows I'm drunk, and he thinks I'm a systems analyst technician whatever the fuck that means"

"Realistically, you know how many new people he meets every single day? He will probably forget all about it by tomorrow morning. You're fine, everything is going to be just fine"

"Okay, okay. Maybe you're right" You agreed.

Those words replayed over and over in your head like a mantra until the next day at two o'clock when you put your headset on to join in on an meeting about yesterday's mission.

You tried your hardest to push past the sinking feeling twisting your insides while you waited for their voices to come through, and when they did your heart sank.

"Awwww I think Steve is in looooove" Sam's voice taunted in a little song.

"Let's ask Tony about her when he gets here! You said she was on the phone with him right? I'm sure he can give you all the information you need" Natasha suggested.

"When you say she's pretty, how pretty do you actually mean?" Bucky questioned doubtfully.

"Stunning. I can't believe I've never seen her around before" Steve laid Bucky's words to rest.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. Maybe you should just hang up and call out for the day. You knew they were all trying to get Steve to date, they were probably all so excited that he was talking about a girl like that.

Wait... they were talking about you.

Steve Rogers thinks you're stunning.

He thought you were stunning when you looked like that.

Instant heartburn.

How were you supposed to cut into this conversation without seeming suspicious? Act. Normal.

"Who are you talking about, my love? Me?" You joked trying your hardest to not pass out on the spot. Little did he know...

"Oooooohhhh caught red handed" Clint shouted like a grade school student.

"Steve fell in love with a drunk girl in an elevator last night" Bucky explained bluntly.

"A stunning drunk girl?" You questioned with a forceful smile, you needed to sound as normal and undisturbed as possible.

"From what we've heard" Natasha confirmed.

"Is she willing to share with me?"

"You'll always be my one and only, sweetheart" Steve reassured.

Ironic.

"Keep talking like that and you're going to have no choice but to actually marry me"

"I'll go buy you a ring as soon as this meeting lets out" he said confidently.

You could hear the door of the meeting room open and close followed by Tony's voice. "Keep it in your pants love birds, let's get to work"

The rest of the meeting went smoothly, but that didn't do anything to still your fidgeting fingers and keep your bouncing leg in place. You knew that the closer they got to the end, the sooner the banter would start up again.

Tony's routine meeting conclusion of "I think that covers it. Anything else we should touch on?" Sparked the exact conversation you were dreading.

"Yeah! Yes." Sam jumped on it as if it was slowly killing him to keep the knowledge Steve's new love internalized. "Who's the girl you were talking to on the phone last night?"

"I talk to lots of people all the time. I have no clue what you're talking about" Tony played dumb.

"Stevie boy got in the elevator with a girl who was on the phone with you. Allegedly she was beautiful and captivating enough to spark a cute little middle school crush" Nat tried to refresh his memory.

"You invited her to the party tonight" Steve added.

"Ah right, I don't think she's coming" Tony deflected.

"But who is she? What's her name?" Wanda questioned.

"Eva" Tony said bluntly nearly giving you a heart attack. Thankfully, it wasn't your real name. "Leave her alone, she's really shy and pretty tentative. I'm sure a hoard of nosy Avengers all up in her business is the last thing she wants"

"Oooh, I like her already" Clint smiled.

"I do agree that everyone should leave her alone" Steve's strong voice commanded.

"So it's settled. Leave her be. Anything else?" Tony asked.

Everyone looked around at each other, all of them shrugging their shoulders or shaking their heads.

"Alright, no more work for the day. I expect to see all of you in your best outfits tonight" Tony dismissed them.

You quickly hung up after a speedy goodbye in anticipation of hanging out with your bestie tonight. It was Friday and a half work day, of course you were absolutely buzzing to get out of there.

By the time you had made it from your office to your apartment to get ready for the rest of the day, your phone was buzzing in your pocket from texts sent by Steve.

SR: Hey Princess! You left so quick I didn't even get a chance to talk to you! How are you?

SR:Hopefully an invite to the party was extended to you for tonight? I already know you aren't going to come, but that doesn't mean I'll ever stop inviting you :P

You: Always so thoughtful, sweet boy. Maybe if I didn't already agree to sushi and sake with my bestie I would come sweep you off your feet ;)

You: Also I'm sorry! Wouldn't have left so quick if I knew you were trying to talk to me. Im doing aye okay! Have you recovered from yesterday's mission?

SR: Honestly, sushi and sake sounds so yummy and way better than another Stark party :,). I'm almost recovered but I'm so tired I feel like I could sleep for another 70 years

You: Take a nap!!! Want me to come snuggle you to sleep?

SR: I could probably benefit from some cuddles to be honest

You: Couldn't we all?

SR: Hope you have the best sushi ever

You: Hope you have the best nap ever. Sweet dreams! Love you long time :p

SR: Love you lots!!!

Once again, you put down your phone and focused on yourself. You raced to get ready and had to stop yourself from running out of the compound to fill up your starving belly.

Dinner and drinks ended up being the perfect stress reliever, but walking around and doing some shopping in the city after was definitely healing your soul. Filling in your best friend about all the recent drama within the team over warm cinnamon rolls from their favorite corner bakery left you feeling so thankful you had at least one person outside of the team you could trust and talk you through everything happening in your life. You also loved hearing all about her drama within the IT department.

By the time you were walking home, your phone was flooded with texts in the team group chat from drunk avengers who were very obviously talking about you at the party.

Sam: Smiles we're placing bets about you right now. Are you tall or short? We have $10 on the line!

Nat: has anyone seen Clint? I think he ran away

Nat: Smiles is short for sure

Clint: I'm literally looking at you right now?

Bucky: I think she's tall

Wanda: Tiny but mighty

Tony: I planned a whole party and you guys are using it as a betting race for Smiles' height? Only mildly irritating.

Bucky: Steve is grumpy. Someone find a way to get him drunk

Pepper: Smiles is short :)

Sam: ????????????????? Pepper you know her why are you placing a bet?????????

Pepper: oops

You: Oh? Should I feel offended by this?

You: Why is Steve grumpy? What did you guys do to him?

You: Did anyone find Clint?

Sam: what's your height?

Bucky: He's grumpy because he's tired and hungry LOL

You: someone feed him!!! Y'all suck

You: You guys are all in the same room! Put your phones down, weirdos!

Clint: it's a very big room

Nat: maybe he's sad that Eva isn't here :(

You: Steve blink twice if you need help

Steve: You can't see it but I'm blinking

Steve: I'm sad because Smiles isn't here

Bucky: me too tbh

Wanda: did I miss the result of the bet?

You: Sweet sweet Wanda I love you!!!

You: Im 5"2

Tony: I think that's generous

Sam: TINY

Bucky: a whole foot smaller than me

Nat: I just know you're adorable!!!!!

Tony: now everyone place bets on if you think she's pretty or not

You: Tony you suck

You: Kiss my ass

Tony: <3

Pepper: don't do that. She's beautiful. Promise

You: Is this what y'all do when I'm not around to listen? Lolololol

Bucky: How pretty?

You: Omg

Tony: Smiles and Steve would make a cute couple

Steve: that's good! We already are a cute couple so this conversation is pretty unproductive

You: You tell 'em baby <3

Clint: what color hair do you have?

Sam: and eyes

You: Wanna know my bra size too?

Sam: well Steve does need to know what size lingerie to buy you for your wedding night ;)

You: We're already married

Steve: got her name changed to Smiles Rogers last week

Bucky: Steve is still grumpy

Nat: Clint is still missing in action

Clint: I'm at the bar

You: Don't worry, Stevie baby. I'll take care of you <3

You: Clint I'm going to put a location tracker on your ass

Sam: thank god. Someone needs to turn his frown upside-down.

You: You guys put your phones down and enjoy the party, I'll brb ;)

A few more stops around the city and a stealthy walk around the compound praying you wouldn't get caught, you curated the perfect plan to get Steve exactly what he wanted.

After making sure everything was in place, you quickly fled the scene to insure you wouldn't get spotted by any avengers as it happened since you had to approach a waitress at the entrance of the party to make it happen.

Sure, Steve was admittedly grumpy. But that didn't stop him from plastering a fake smile across his face while socializing with people he barely knew for hours on end. It's not like his shortening fuse and grumbling tummy was plaguing the rest of the mood for everyone else, so why Bucky kept choosing to bring it up was completely unbeknownst to him.

Besides, he was justified. Who would throw a party with just alcohol? No food, no snacks.

Maybe if he was a little better slept, being hungry wouldn't have made him so irrational. But what he wasn't admitting out loud was that he hadn't had any peaceful sleep since their last mission. His last night of sleep was full of constant interruptions and an occasional nightmare, and the nap he tried to take to make up for it had the same result.

So when a waitress approached him frantically with furrowed eyebrows and a shaken look on her face, he didn't even know if he was annoyed that his superhero status made him so approachable for help, or if he was happy to leave the party by any means.

"I'm so sorry to interrupt, Captain Rogers but something weird is happening and I don't know what is is or wh-" She rambled with a seemingly nervous buzz.

"It's alright, what happened?" He comforted the girl who couldn't have been older than seventeen. She looked like a young child to him.

"There's a person walking up and down the halls of where all the avengers rooms are. I think it was a girl but they had a hoodie on I couldn't really tell. They were being super creepy, jiggling all the doorknobs and trying to enter codes into the keypads. None of the doors opened but they left a package and I'm just really worried about it" She spoke at a hundred miles per hour. He could barely even get his brain to focus on her words through the thumping music and loud chatter around the room.

"I'll go look into it right now. Thanks for letting me know" He reassured her before pushing his way through the sea of people and exiting the noisy crowd into the solitude of their private living space.

The thumping of the music was now only a distant mumble and his shoes against the floor were the loudest noise around him. It brought him an odd amount of comfort as he snuck through the very halls the waitress had seen the suspicious person wandering.

Sure enough, the person was gone but there was a package. A brown paper bag right in front of his door.

He approached slowly, full of apprehension as his brain though of all the worst case scenarios of what could possibly be inside.

Was it a bomb? Perhaps disembodied limbs? A death threat?

But the closer he got, he noticed a little card with his name written in the neatest handwriting he's ever seen sticking out of the top.

It eased his suspicions a bit, but he still stood back as far as he could while peeking his head forward to look inside the bag.

Sushi and sake.

He threw his head back with a smile and a sigh of relief when he realized who it was from, and the concerned waitress was just a trap.

He unlocked the door and walked in his room before kicking off his shoes and opening the card inside.

My dearest husband, Steve~

Sorry for the little production, had to find a way to get you out of there! Hope this helps your bad case of the grumpies ;) Love you, mean it!

~ your wife, Mrs. Smiles Rogers

Steve happily accepted the excuse to end his appearance at the social event and spend the rest of his night eating alone and indulging in a good book.

However, after his belly was full and he had showered, he could barely even get his mind to focus on the book in his hands. His mind kept running off to the conversations the team regularly had about Smiles. In hindsight, he felt guilty.

There had to be a reason why you chose to stay hidden away from them, and there were so many valid reasons to choose that for yourself. He couldn't imagine that being easy, and he also knew that even with distance between them, you made the avengers feel loved and cared for.

You had the sweetest soul and just your voice alone had the ability to sooth the nerves of in-battle superheroes while also being commanding enough to get shit done. Smiles felt special regardless of what you looked like, he knew that with full confidence.

So when the whole team placed stupid bets on your height, or hair color, and even regularly begging Tony to tell them more about the way you looked, he couldn't help but to feel a little angry at them. Sure, it was fun to visualize what a person they loved could possibly look like, but boiling your worth down to physical attributes was wrong.

He didn't know if it was his own guilt or faulting mood that craved the comfort of a conversation with his favorite teammate, but either way his hands were dialing your number faster than his brain even thought about it.

"Hello?" The familiar voice came through, instantly putting a smile on his face.

"Hey, baby" He giggled, it was obvious you didn't check collar ID before picking up.

"Oh! Hi, cutie" Your smile was obvious now and your mood seemed to have dramatically changed. "Didn't realize that was you calling. I just assumed it was Sam or Bucky calling me again"

"Again?" Steve asked.

"Yeah, they called like 10 minutes ago. Something about wanting to know if I had curly or straight hair." You explained.

"Oh man, they're really laying in on you tonight huh, Sweetheart?" Steve sighed.

"It's alright" You shrugged even though you knew he couldn't see it. "I'd be curious too, I can't really blame them. How are you feeling? Better?"

"So much better, all thanks to you. I feel like I owe you a billion dollars for getting me out of there alone. Thank you so much"

"Oh stop it" You giggled. "I know how much it sucks to be stuck in a social situation when you aren't feeling the best. It's our duty to look out for each other."

"Well I think you're an angel sent from heaven above, and I appreciate you more than you'll ever know"

"You're making me blush over here! Anything for you, baby."

Both of your laughter took over before you caught you composure again and a small comfortable silence took over. It was like you guys were both weighing out the pros and cons of bringing up the slightly heavier topics you wanted to talk about. But, you pushed past the slight racing in your heart and tried to be brave for the sake of making sure he was genuinely alright.

"Bucky mentioned you were tired, what happened to that nap you were supposed to take?" You questioned sympathetically.

It was almost like you already knew the answer, yet for some reason, Steve always felt safe talking to you. Sometimes he found himself telling you about things he didn't even tell Bucky.

"To be quite honest, I don't really know." He sighed. "No matter how tired I get I just can't sleep, and when I do sleep it's not great."

"You should ask Tony to install an off and on switch connected to your brain" You suggested.

"You're so right. That's brilliant. Do you have one?" He questioned.

"Nope. Unfortunately for me my brain is always on. I'm very familiar with sleep issues" You explained. "Bold of me to assume your dreams haven't been too sweet?"

"Not bold at all. I think that mission got to me, I'm not even really sure why. It's not like it was a particularly bad one" He admitted.

"I'm pretty sure all missions are bad missions" You though out loud. "You know...... not to be drab or anything"

“You're right, maybe I'm just desensitized to it"

"Ground work is not fun, it makes me sad you guys have to do it so often. And I hope that nothing ever gets bad enough that I have to join you guys out there" Your tone was sympathetic, but it was interrupted a few times by tiny high pitched meows.

"Hold on, there's so much to unpack" Steve laughed. "Do I hear.... a cat?"

"Yes Sir" He could hear that constant smile come back. "A very needy and annoying cat that's trying to convince me that he's starving even though I see food in his bowl right now"

"What?! I thought we weren't allowed to have pets?" He jealously questioned.

"You guys aren't allowed to have pets, but apparently Tony thinks I'm special"

"Apparently! What's his name?" Steve couldn't help but to smile at the wholesome image of you on the phone with a little cat stepping all over you trying to earn some attention.

"Eeyore! He always has this little grumpy expression on his face, hence the name" You explained.

"I'm so jealous! I wish I could have a cat" He pouted like a child as the meows turned into content purrs.

"Have you asked Tony?"

"I ask him like once every two months"

"Did you know if you see a therapist you can get a note and qualification for an emotional support animal? Then legally Tony can't say no" You said smugly.

"Is that how you got to be so special?" He asked with a chuckle.

"Therapy all the way, baby" You confirmed his suspicions.

"Okay, next question. Have you ever done groundwork?"

"Only twice and decided right on the spot that my particular set of skills is more beneficial in an environment I can concentrate in. I'm fully trained for emergencies though, so if all of humanity is on the avengers shoulders you guys will be seeing me up close and personal" You explained.

"Well in that case I hope I never meet you" He joked.

"Same here! I'll just keep admiring you from a distance"

"That implies you see me on the regular" Steve poked, wondering how often he's around you while being completely unaware.

"You know what? Not as often as you might think!"

"No? I'd assume at least once a day."

"I don't even remember the last time I saw you." You lied in hopes of dissolving any tiny suspicions that elevator Eva might've been you. "Are you sure you even still live here?"

"Oh I'm positive. Because if I didn't, maybe if actually be getting some sleep." He pointed out.

"Touché."

"I have a question for you, and I hope it's okay to ask, but does it bother you when everyone asks questions about what you look like?" He sounded hesitant and boarder-line sad about it.

"Most if the questions don't bother me, but I'm not particularly a fan of Tony asking everyone if they think I'm ugly. He's lucky I knew he was joking or else I'd actually beat his ass" Your answer earned a hum in agreement from Steve as you contemplated on letting him in more.

You knew he had a heart of gold, nothing you could say to him would be held against you and he certainly wouldn't use it to dig around to find more information about you.

"The part that actually bothers me is that I can't answer. It makes me sad to rain on the parade. I wish I could answer all the questions and be with you guys all the time but I can't." You elaborated.

"Well I certainly don't think you're raining on any parades, sweetheart." The amount of sincerity in Steve's voice made you smile and your tummy flip. "If it starts to bother you too much, just let me know and I'll yell at them."

"I don't think any yelling needs to happen." You giggled, followed by some shuffling sounds.

"Whatcha doinnnnnn?"

"Mmmmmmmm I'd tell you but I think you're going to make fun of me." Your sweet voice contemplated.

"Me? Make fun of my wife? Never!" He was fake offended.

"Okay, then I'll tell you."

"Let's hear it!"

"I just got into bed and buried myself into a mountain of blankets." You admitted.

"Okay then I can't really make fun of you even if I wanted to because I'm doing the same exact thing right now." Steve smiled.

"Wow, we really are soulmates. Huh, handsome?"

"Seems like it, Lovie."

Even as it started getting late, you guys stayed on the phone for hours. Whether he wanted to admit it or not, your chit-chat was helping him ease all the residual anxiety and preemptive nerves of a night full of terrible dreams. But eventually, he fell asleep.

When the comfortable silence turned into even, soft and steady breaths, you knew he had lost the battle. Nothing made you happier knowing that you had lulled such a gentle giant to sleep- even if it was unintentional.

That night, the nightmares never showed up which Steve was thankful for. When he woke up the next morning slightly confused as to when exactly he fell asleep, he realized that talking to Smiles was the absolute highlight of his day.

Over the course of a few months, that same phone call became routine. Right before bed, you would wait for your phone to ring and the two of you would talk about everything under the sun and absolutely nothing at all. You guys spoke about your days, simple pleasures, complex issues, how much you loved your work, how much you hated your work, and even your love lives (or lack there of).

The more comfortable you became around him, the more you contemplated on adding him to the small group of people who knew your true identity. It was getting especially hard to keep him away when he would ask the cutest questions with his raspy, sleepy voice as he drifted off to dreamland.

Each question always started with a genuine "you don't have to answer, but...". And each one usually involved when you would see him. He wondered where you saw him walking around the most, if you had ever even been to the Avengers private sector of the compound, and most importantly if you two had ever had a face to face conversation.

Since it had been a few months post elevator incident and he had finally stopped talking about 'Eva' you answered with an honest yes but nothing more descriptive than that. He respectfully asked more about that interaction but nothing that would give away exactly when and where it had happened. It was playful, and he loved teasing you about it.

"I know you're lying to me" Steve laughed with a smile, thankful you couldn't see his face turning red.

"I'm not, but you can believe whatever you want Pretty Princess" You made fun of the nickname Steve was stuck on tonight.

"Sweetheart, I'd recognize that pretty little voice anytime of the day. There is no way I looked you in the eyes and held a conversation without knowing" He insisted.

"Oh so you do know me! Where'd we meet?" You questioned while shaking your head with a smile.

"We didn't. You're lying"

“I shook your hand too" You happily added fuel to the fire.

"You shook my hand?!?!?" His voice was twice as loud as he shouted that statement. Drama queen. "Now you're really lying"

"How many hands do you shake a day, baby?"

"A lot." He said bluntly. "What color was I wearing?"

"White" You immediately answered knowing he was trying to call your bluff.

"I always wear white" he complained.

"It looks good on ya!" You complemented. "I just winked by the way."

"I gathered that." He reassured.

You readjusted your blankets for maximum comfort, completely unaware of the silence that fell over them. Your tired eyes stayed closed and your phone resided on the unoccupied pillow next to your head.

"You falling asleep on me, sweet girl?" He questioned.

"Mhm, I'm drowning under the weight of my own lies" You mumbled into the pillow as Eeyore made himself cozy on your back. He curled up into a little ball so you were pretty much stuck laying on your stomach.

"Punk"

"Jerk" you rolled your eyes.

Comfortable silence took over, both of your brains were running far away into the vast planes of dreamland, minds forming half conscious thoughts at a mile a minute... too lazy to verbalize any of them.

That was until you had one that you couldn't quite keep to yourself. He just made you too damn happy. "Honey?" You whispered, hoping he wasn't asleep yet.

"Yes, sweetheart?" He questioned, voice deep and raspy.

"One day, I'm going to be able to give you the biggest hug in the world." You told him.

A big smile smeared across his sleepy face at your words. "That'll be the best day of my life."

"Your life?!" You emphasized.

"The whole entire thing." He confirmed. "And whenever you come give me the biggest hug in the whole world, I'm going to give you the biggest hug in the universe... you know that?"

"Sounds amazing." You pulled the blankets around you even tighter. "You know I would if I could."

"I know, I know." Steve reassured sympathetically. "There is never any pressure, Baby. I find comfort knowing you're only one call away, really, that's already so close."

"And when our phones go out in the middle of the night, we're only a few floors away in the same four walls." You agreed.

"To me, that feels like a hug." Steve let you know. "The biggest one in the whole wide world."

"Maybe the universe." Those three words were the last you managed to mumble out before sleep forcefully washed over you.

Although Steve knew deep down he was going to be let down eventually, he couldn't help the warm and fuzzy feeling that basked in his brain and swirled around tummy at the act of falling asleep to such a lovely voice every single night. It felt domestic and vulnerable, like it was always meant to be that way.

He didn't even know when it happened, but at a certain point he didn't even have to try anymore. The romantic sentiments and pet names just rolled off his tongue without second thought. At its height, he found himself daydreaming about what it might be like to actually meet you one day. He knew it probably would never happen, but for now he was happy knowing that the distance between you was so small that it was practically an illusion.

Next: The Smiley Sticker

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rjzimmerman · 4 months ago

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Excerpt from this story from the New York Times:

Tiny snouts and long tails. Checkerboards of black and brown scales. Eggs the size of oranges cracking alongside hatchlings mewling and chirping like a choir of baby birds.

The birth of 60 Siamese crocodiles in the wild last month was all very Jurassic Park.

The hatchlings were the largest population born this century, representing two decades of conservation efforts. While the babies slipped and waddled through their trio of nests, their marble-like eyes blinked upon a bright new world for a species once nearly as extinct as the dinosaurs.

“There’s a biodiversity crisis around the world, but in the tropics of Southeast Asia it’s particularly acute,” said Pablo Sinovas, the country director for the Cambodia program of Fauna and Flora, the conservation group monitoring the comeback. “The fact that we’ve been able to help these crocodiles recover and see this landmark breeding event, it’s very significant.”

Siamese crocodiles were first listed as virtually extinct in the wild in 1992. While captive populations lived in zoos and crocodile farms, decades of poaching of the animals for their soft, coppery hides that were used in the fashion industry, along with habitat degradation, had razed the wild population.

In 2000, a very small population was recorded in the remote Cardamom Mountains of Cambodia. The Indigenous population of Chorng people had protected the crocodiles, which they considered sacred, for generations. The species is smaller and less aggressive than its saltwater crocodile relative, and there is no recorded evidence of attacks by the animals on humans, including people who wash clothes and children who swim in the rivers the crocodiles call home.

For the last two decades, Fauna and Flora has worked with government agencies and local people to formalize species protection through a program that provides a modest stipend, along with work clothes, GPS devices and transportation like kayaks and motorcycles.

“The community members already protecting the sites is key to why this program works,” Mr. Sinovas said. “Instead of a group coming from the outside, we’re supporting what’s already there.” At last count, a very rough estimate of 250 adult crocodiles persisted in Cambodia, according to Fauna and Flora, and between 500 and 1,000 existed in the wild, according to the International Union for Conservation of Nature.

Siamese crocodiles “are a charismatic, large predator, so they naturally fascinate humans, and they have cultural importance,” Mr. Sinovas said, noting that their conservation could have ripple effects.

#Siamese crocodiles #Cambodia #Youtube

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lexluth0r · 9 months ago

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Poststructuralism and Postmodernism

PART I: Freedom! '90" George Michael

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The music video for "Freedom! '90" by George Michael is a visually iconic and cinematic piece directed by David Fincher. Released in 1990, the video is known for its stylish and memorable scenes. The video does not feature George Michael himself; instead, it showcases five of the era's top supermodels: Naomi Campbell, Linda Evangelista, Christy Turlington, Cindy Crawford, and Tatjana Patitz. The supermodels lip-sync the lyrics of the song and perform various scenes. The video is a departure from Michael's earlier image and marks a significant moment in his career. It symbolizes his decision to step away from the spotlight and let his music speak for itself. The models, who were at the peak of their fame, are shown mouthing the lyrics, highlighting a transition from the image-driven phase of George Michael's career to a focus on his music and artistic expression. The video has a chic and glamorous aesthetic, combining visually stunning scenes of the models in rooms of an abandoned house, posing through streaks of sunlight and hues of blueshimmering on their faces, glimpses of water, and modern means for musical transmission.

Thinking in terms of Deleuze’s theory on repetition, multiple mediums of audio transmission can be seen throughout the music video. At 0:0:14, one of the models uses a laser to turn on a futuristic vinyl stereo setup, then the shot pans to a vhs tape player. The shot switches between these two music playing set ups and turns to a cd cover of george michael’s album “Listen Without Prejudice”. This emphasis on the continued auditory media as a means of communication suggests the duplication of the same ideas transcending generations of innovation, as well as creating and distributing music throughout multiple mediums to send a message. This evolution of technology containing an evolving idea of transmitting auditory media to the masses represents Deleuze’s idea that replication is a means to transform the meaning of an idea. The more these technological devices evolve, the more efficient and optimized listening to music can be, the more capabilities are possible and the more people can be reached via music.

Through the perspective of Baudrillard, it can be interpreted that Michael is creating a new hyperreality for himself in the video. By using specific signs throughout the development of the shots, Michael distorts and solidifies new meanings of objects within the space. For instance, at 0:2:18, a motorcycle jacket is seen burning on its hanger. Delving into the meaning in real life, the BSA jacket shown in the video was an iconic piece that Michael wore during the Faith tour, where he experienced huge commercial success as a pop star. By burning the jacket, Michael metaphorically sheds his old identity and embraces a new sense of freedom and authenticity. The act of burning the jacket serves as a symbolic rebirth and a declaration of independence from the expectations of the music industry. Using Baudrillard’s terms, the burning of the jacket, as a form of simulacra, denotes the destruction of the reality Michael was currently in, and the creation of simulation through Michael’s autonomy of creative direction. Through another analysis of the signs in the video, the different forms of electronic mass media, Baudrillard’s theory suggests these signs maintain the illusion of reality.

At 0:0:45, Naomi Campbell is seen listening to the song through headphones, on top of the other mediums of media transmission previously mentioned. In addition, the main feature of the video is all of the models lip synching the song instead of Michael himself. Baudrillard’s theory applies to how mass media, especially in the form of electronics, maintains the illusion of reality. These auditory devices in essence “control” the models in this hyperreality, using them as the means to convey the message of the song. The video begins with them turning on the devices, and ends with them conveying the same lyrics that were being played by the electronics.

Finally, examining the video utilizing the theories of Jameson’s postmodernism, the video can be interpreted through symbols used of the shallow nature of commercialization and consumer culture. Jameson's criticism of postmodernism includes the notion of "empty signifiers," where cultural products lack depth and critical engagement. In the video, the glamorous and stylish representation of supermodels, although visually striking, may be seen as lacking in substantive content. The emphasis on aesthetics and surface-level appeal aligns with Jameson's critique of the shallowness in postmodern cultural production. Though this may be true just looking at the visual elements in the video, the lyrical message behind the song tells another story. Famousky, Michael sings the line “sometimes the clothes do not make the man”. Meaning that one may be satisfied with a material means of happiness, but they are a shallow representation of the individual beyond their capitalistic idealization. The use of models in the video highlights the need to use commercially accepted visions of beauty and glamor to convey messages to the masses, because this is used by the ruling class. The main theme of the song is Michael’s desire to distance himself from the highly commercial pop star image of himself, singing “But today the way I play the game is not the same, No way, Think I’m gonna get myself happy”. He rejects the emptiness of his previous images, and wants to pursue genuine happiness through feeling genuine in his artistry. Models are often used as surface level vessels to promote brands and corporations, it can be interpreted that Michael uses them to convey the messages of “Freedom” to encourage people to break free from the shackles of consumer culture and pursue happiness outside of material gain.

Through Deleuze's theory on repetition, the use of multiple mediums for audio transmission symbolizes the evolution of technology and the transformative power of replicating ideas across generations. In Baudrillard's lens, the video becomes a narrative of Michael creating a new reality for himself by distorting and solidifying meanings of objects, especially through the symbolic act of burning his iconic jacket. Baudrillard's hyperreality concept is evident in the models being controlled by electronic mass media, maintaining the illusion of reality. Furthermore, Jameson's postmodernism critique unveils a juxtaposition between the visually glamorous representation of supermodels and the song's deeper message, revealing the emptiness of commercialization and consumer culture. The video challenges the superficiality of postmodern cultural production by using models as vessels to convey a message urging people to break free from the constraints of a consumerist society that controls them.

Discussion Questions:

What scenes in the video stood out to you in terms of commercialism/consumerism, how does Michael portray this?

Do you think George Michael is truly breaking free from a commercialized pop star when he continues to release music within the culture industry?

PART II: "1979" The Smashing Pumpkins

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The music video for "1979" by the Smashing Pumpkins, a popular 90s Rock song depicts the lives of suburban youth in the 1970s. It features a series of seemingly random and disconnected snapshots that capture the experiences of teenage life, including house parties, driving around town, and various interactions. The video conveys a sense of nostalgia and the carefree spirit of youth, emphasizing the themes of rebellion, friendship, and the search for identity. The visual style is characterized by a documentary-like approach, with a mix of intimate moments and energetic scenes, reflecting the diversity and complexity of youth culture, along with an idealization of being young. The scenes are depicted in snapshots like memories that fill the viewer with a sense of yearning for a time gone by. Overall, the video complements the song's themes and provides a visual narrative that resonates with the song's exploration of the teenage experience in 1979.

Fredric Jameson in his article “Postmodernism and Consumerist Society,” delves into the transformations in social, economic, and cultural realms instigated by postmodernism. It challenges the conventional idea of a 'post-industrial' phase and underscores the heightened dominance of capitalism. Jameson critiques the perspectives of thinkers like Daniel Bell, contending that capitalism has solidified its influence. The reading explores how shifts in capitalism's mode of production align with novel forms of cultural expression. It characterizes postmodernism in literature, music, film, and environments by its emphasis on surface, pastiche, and paranoia. Jameson examines pastiche in postmodernism, defining it as a neutral form of aestheticism devoid of parody's satirical impulse. This reflects a move towards stylistic diversity and heterogeneity. Additionally, he addresses the "death of the subject" in postmodernism, challenging the notion of unique personal identities and individualism as central tenets of classical modernism. Through this perspective, the music video for “1979”, complemented with the lyricism, engages with nostalgia coupled with an idealization of consumer culture associated with youth culture. For instance, the video features several scenes of teens driving in a vintage car (first seen at 0:0:23). The car is associated with teenage freedom and a sense of identity, leading to endless possibilities and activities that the teens take advantage of. It's also the very function of the fleeting nature of youth itself The suburban setting also provides an easy showcase for consumerist culture. According to Jameson, while talking about the movie Body Heat, he explains “One begins to realise after a while that the small town setting has a crucial strategic function: it allows the film to do without most of the signals and references which we might associate with the contemporary world, with consumer society - the appliances and artifacts, the high rises, the object world of late capitalism (170)” (1). All of the images shown throughout the video, the cars, the long streets to cruise, the band, and the parties are placed among a suburban setting, as the singer sits in the back of a car reflecting and longing for the image of a “simpler time”. This simplicity however, encourages the material exchange of money for experience, dimming the sense of uniqueness that is commodified by the feeling of youth. Thus, youth culture and consumer culture go hand in hand. Youths think that their experience is shaped by a series of unique memories, but really the subconscious influence of materialism is showcased right in front of their eyes. Overall, the video and lyrics depict a constructed, simulated representation of youth culture and nostalgia, reflecting the influence of media and cultural simulations on our perceptions of reality.

Gilles Deleuze's "Introduction: Difference and Repetition" provides a foundation for his philosophical exploration of difference and repetition. Deleuze challenges traditional philosophical concepts by emphasizing the primacy of difference over identity and repetition over representation. He critiques the way Western thought has historically focused on identity and homogeneity, arguing for the significance of diversity, multiplicity, and differentiation. Deleuze introduces the idea of "difference in itself" and explores how difference operates as a creative force, generating new possibilities and forms. He also investigates the concept of repetition, not as a mere duplication of the same but as a transformative and generative process to shape new meaning out of reproduction. The introduction sets the stage for Deleuze's intricate analysis of these themes throughout the rest of the work, challenging conventional philosophical paradigms and paving the way for his unique philosophical perspective. Deleuze's concept of repetition as a transformative process rather than a mere duplication resonates with the themes in "1979." The song and its video capture the repetition of certain experiences in youth culture, such as parties and social interactions. Deleuze's idea of repetition as a creative force that generates novelty. It’s important to note that the video and song was written in the year 1997, yet the video takes place, like the title suggests, in the year 1979. Thus, the video is a repetition of the representation of youth culture in the 1970s. Although not identical, this representation allows for interpretation of what this time period looked like, and develops new meaning from the spectatorship of the viewer. Deleuze emphasizes that repetition of signs, especially relating to the concept of the “self” are not what signs are, but rather their transformative properties of what they can become. Deleuze challenges fixed identities, and the music video portrays a fluid sense of identity within the youth culture it represents. The diverse scenes and interactions showcase a multiplicity of experiences and personalities, resonating with Deleuze's call for an understanding of identity that goes beyond rigid categories. Due to the diverse experiences in the music video, throwing chairs into the pool (0:2:35) and bowling with bottles in the grocery store (0:3:53), these ideas are representative of the heterogeneous culture centered around youth, though unified under one concept of being carefree. All in all, Gilles Deleuze's philosophical theory serves as a philosophical groundwork that challenges conventional notions of identity, emphasizing the transformative nature of difference and repetition. This resonates with the themes in the Smashing Pumpkins' "1979'' music video, where the repetition of youth experiences becomes a creative force generating new meanings. Despite the video being set in 1979, its repetition serves as a representation of the era, allowing for diverse interpretations and emphasizing Deleuze's idea that signs transform and generate novelty. The video's portrayal of fluid and heterogeneous identities aligns with Deleuze's call for understanding beyond rigid categories, showcasing a multiplicity of experiences within a unified concept of carefree youth culture. Through scenes of unconventional activities, the video captures the transformative properties of repetition, illustrating Deleuze's philosophy in the context of youth identity and cultural representation.

Jean Baudrillard's "Simulacra and Simulations" delves into the concept of hyperreality, where simulations and copies come to dominate and replace the original reality they represent. Baudrillard argues that in contemporary society, signs and symbols no longer point to an underlying reality but instead create a self-referential system. He introduces the idea of simulacra, which are copies without an original, and suggests that simulations have become more real and influential than the reality they mimic. Baudrillard explores the impact of media, technology, and consumer culture on shaping our perceptions, challenging traditional notions of reality and representation. The essay delves into the dissolution of boundaries between reality and simulation, questioning the authenticity of experiences and identities in a world increasingly saturated with signs and images. Putting this lens over the analysis of “1979”, a hyperreality is created by the setting of the music video. This simulation capitalizes off of the simplistic nature of youth and creates a feeling of nostalgia and longing for a carefree version of life. Even the lyrics suggest this love of a time gone by coupled with the dread of growing up. “That we don't even care as restless as we are. We feel the pull in the land of a thousand guilts. And poured cement (0:2:08)”. Baudrillard notes this certain draw towards simulations stating that “When the real is no longer what it used to be, nostalgia assumes its full meaning (153)” (2). The music video was made in the 1990s, but about the 1970s, emphasizing that the meaning of the song and music video is a means to cope with the loss of the carefree days of youth. Baudrillard would argue that the video is not a direct reflection of reality but a simulation created by media representations, contributing to the construction of a hyperreal youth culture. Baudrillard's concept of simulacra suggests that in a hyperreal world, identities become fluid and constructed, influenced by media and cultural simulations. The portrayal of youth in the video reflects a simulation of identity influenced by cultural representations rather than an authentic expression of individual experiences. The video itself follows snapshots of youths and experiences reminiscent of memories, from signs like parties to joyrides. However, the simulation created through the music video itself lacks depth, and is a generalization and idealization of youth culture rather than unique experiences. Baudrillard explained the nature of the hyperreal and simulacra, noting “It retains all the features, the whole discourse of traditional production, but it is nothing more than its scaled-down refraction (159)” (3).

The video, set against the backdrop of suburban youth in the 1970s, becomes a centerpiece that showcases both an idealized past and a constructed representation of youth culture. Jameson's critique of postmodernism's emphasis on surface, pastiche, and the "death of the subject" resonates with the video's depiction of fragmented memories that present a shallow and idealized version of youth.

Deleuze's philosophy of difference and repetition aligns with the diverse and tokenized aspects of youth experiences depicted in the video. The repetition of the aura of the year 1979 becomes a creative force, generating new meanings and contributing to a fluid and heterogeneous sense of identity, specifically around youth culture.

Baudrillard's concept of hyperreality and simulacra further deepens the analysis. The video, portraying an idealized version of the 1970s, becomes a hyperreal simulation that blurs the boundaries between reality and representation. The nostalgia felt by the viewer is not for a historical reality but for a carefully constructed and simulated past.

Discussion Questions:

Can people who weren’t living in the 1970s still feel nostalgic about this time? Why or why not?

Are our experiences, especially in youth, a result of consumer culture, or is youth culture detached from consumerism?

Works Cited:

Jameson, Fredric, ““Postmodernism and Consumer Society”(New York, NY, Pearson Education Limited: 1992).

Baudrillard, Jean, “Simulacra and Simulations” (New York, NY, Pearson Education Limited: 1992).

Deleuze, Giles, "Introduction: Repetition and Difference" (New York, NY, Columbia University Press: 1994)

@theuncannyprofessoro

#oxyvisualanalysis #discussionleader #Youtube

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raionhatothecat · 5 months ago

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Raionhato history:

Raionhato lost her parents when she was just a child, leading her to an unforgiving fate at the Bonta military facility. There, she underwent rigorous training that turned her into a formidable assassin. Despite the hostile environment and mistreatment she suffered at the hands of her superiors, Raionhato found a ray of hope in the company of other children with similar abilities. Together, they shared their sorrows and dreams of freedom, forming an unbreakable bond.

Raionhato was no ordinary girl; She was a hybrid between a zurcarak and an Eliatrope dragon, giving her unique abilities and extraordinary power. This unusual mix was both a blessing and a curse, as it made her stand out from the rest and attracted the attention of those who wanted to exploit her.

The decision to escape from her was made in a moment of desperation and hope. One night, under the light of the moon, Raionhato and her friends managed to escape surveillance and escape from the facility. Their destiny took them to the quiet and picturesque town of Emelka. There, they found not only shelter, but also a new home among the members of the Tofu brotherhood.

Over time, the relationship between Raionhato and the brotherhood grew stronger. The members of the brotherhood welcomed her as one of their own, teaching her that life could be more than pain and struggle. Together, they faced numerous challenges, from external threats to internal conflicts, always with courage and determination.

Habilities:

1. **Hand-to-hand combat**: Expert in various martial arts and hand-to-hand fighting techniques.

2. **Weapon Handling**: Mastery of a wide range of weapons, from knives and swords to firearms.

3. **Infiltration and stealth**: Ability to move without being detected, perfect for espionage or infiltration missions.

4. **Strategy and tactics**: Ability to plan and execute complex operations, both in combat and in escape situations.

5. **Physical and mental resistance**: Trained to withstand extreme conditions and remain calm under pressure.

6. **Survival**: Advanced knowledge of survival techniques in different environments, from jungles to urban areas.

7. **First Aid**: Ability to provide basic medical care on the battlefield.

8. **Engineering and explosives**: Knowledge in the creation and deactivation of explosives, as well as in the manipulation of machinery and devices.

9. **Intelligence and analysis**: Ability to collect and analyze information vital to the mission.

10. **Leadership**: Ability to lead and motivate her team, especially in high-risk situations.

11. **Emotional Connection**: Strong empathy and ability to form bonds with others, leveraging shared experiences to strengthen her team.

12. **Adaptability**: Ability to quickly adapt to new situations and environments, improvising effective solutions.

13. **Polyglot**: Knowledge of multiple languages, which allows you to communicate and operate in various countries and cultural contexts.

14.**Intuition and perception**: Acute ability to detect hidden dangers, read body language and anticipate the actions of others.

15. **Disguise and performance**: Ability to change appearance and adopt various identities for covert missions.

16**Climbing and parkour**: Ability to move quickly through urban and natural environments using climbing and parkour techniques.

17. **Energy or Magic Manipulation**: In a more fantasy context, you could have the ability to manipulate some type of energy (such as fire, ice, electricity) or use magic for various applications in combat and survival.

18.**Animal Skill**: Special connection with certain animals, allowing you to train them, communicate with them, or use them in missions.

19. **Pilotage**: Ability to pilot various vehicles, from motorcycles and cars to helicopters and airplanes.

20. **Creation of antidotes and poisons**: Advanced knowledge in chemistry to create and neutralize poisons.

21. **Diplomacy and negotiation**: Ability to mediate conflicts and negotiate agreements, useful in situations where violence is not the best option.

Problems:

. **Inexperience in personal relationships**: Due to his upbringing in a militarized environment and his focus on training and survival, Raionhato may lack experience in intimate or romantic personal relationships. This could make her clumsy or uncomfortable in complex emotional situations.

**Sense of guilt for her past as a weapon**: Although Raionhato escaped from the military facility, she may carry a sense of guilt for acts she may have committed under orders or pressure during her training. This emotional burden could affect her self-esteem and her ability to forgive herself.

**Difficulty adjusting to civilian life**: After escaping and finding refuge in Emelka with the Tofu brotherhood, Raionhato may face significant challenges adjusting to the peaceful and routine life of a quiet town. The lack of military structure and discipline could be disconcerting to her.

**Fear of rejection or abandonment**: Despite having found a new home with the Tofu brotherhood, Raionhato might have a persistent fear of rejection or abandonment from her due to his past loss and separation from her. This could lead her to be overprotective of her loved ones or remain emotionally distant.

. **Ethical and Moral Conflicts**: As a product of a military environment that often compromised ethics and morality for the sake of duty and obedience, Raionhato could face complicated ethical dilemmas in her everyday life. The need to make decisions that put her personal values at stake could be a constant source of internal conflict.

1 **Impulsivity in dangerous situations**: Due to her past of military training and escape, Raionhato could be prone to acting impulsively or risky when faced with situations of immediate danger. This could put her at risk or negatively affect her fellow Tofu brotherhood.

**Aversion to interpersonal conflict**: Although skilled in physical and strategic combat, Raionhato may have difficulty dealing with conflicts or emotional problems that arise within the Tofu brotherhood. This could lead her to avoid confrontations necessary to resolve internal problems.

**Distrust of authorities**: Due to her experience in the Bonta military installations and the mistreatment she suffered from her superiors, Raionhato may have a deep distrust of authority figures or hierarchical structures. This could create tensions within the Tofu brotherhood if she faces situations where authority is questioned.

**Emotional Overload**: Although she has found support in the Tofu brotherhood, Raionhato might face difficulties processing intense emotions or past traumas. This could manifest itself in times of extreme stress or when she is faced with painful memories from her past.

** Fear of losing her loved ones **: After having lost her parents and having found a new family in the Tofu brotherhood, Raionhato could have a deep fear of losing those she loves again. This fear could influence her decisions and actions, leading her to take extreme measures to protect her peers.

#wakfu #oc #wakfu oc

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chickensoup-4-mysoul · 2 years ago

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herculean (drrr x f!reader) - chapter 5

chapter 5 - Birds of a Feather

synopsis: you meet a mysterious, helmet-clad woman, and shortly after, a very eccentric pair of twins. a lot of time is spent with the wonderful women of Ikebukuro :)

word count: 3, 521

warnings: very minor nsfw mentions(mairu being mairu)

"quiet whisper in the dead of night tells me everything will be alright if i keep my head to the sky everything is gonna be alright,, everything is gonna be alright - infinity's song

"Namie, if you had to choose between the sayings 'opposites attract' and 'birds of a feather flock together,' which one would you say is most accurate?"

Izaya had been eerily silent ever since Namie came in that morning, making no sound other than the insistent typing of computer keys. She'd think that the silence would be welcome, but going so long without an earful of her employer's antics was starting to irk her. She wouldn't admit to the relief that she felt when he finally opened his mouth for the first time that day.

"Opposites attract, I guess. If you ended up falling in love with someone the exact same as you, you'd butt heads and get bored of one another." She briefly thought of Seiji and their similarities, or lack thereof. They wouldn't get bored of each other, would they...? She could never get bored of him.

"You'd think that, but statistically, you're wrong. Studies have shown that people with similar traits tend to last longer in relationships. Traits, personalities, genes...I thought you would get that more than anyone else, Namie." She missed when he was silent.

"What's with all of this relationship talk all of a sudden? What, you found a girlfriend or something?" She doesn't miss how the smirk on his face disappears and realizes that she had hit a nerve.

"I love humans, Namie. Nothing else."

It's a starkly out-of-place declaration, hinting that something else is most definitely on his mind. Namie, used to his cryptic antics, shakes her head and returns to her work. Izaya, however, has not mentally dropped the topic. He loved humans--even if they didn't seem to love him back. It was fine, intimacy and romance was in no way a priority of his. As he got caught up in his field of work, it wasn't even something that he thought about, not until now. His eyebrow twitched in aggravation as a familiar image appeared in his head. He hated the feeling of envy, he decided. His life was fine, better than that of anyone else's, even, definitely that of...

He huffed through his nose, picking up one of his cellphones.

If he wasn't able to find love...

then how was that monster finding it??

Scrolling through his recent calls, he stops at one of the familiar contacts. With little hesitation, he presses the green 'call' button beside it. The phone rings for a moment before he hears a click.

"Hello, this is Izaya Orihara. I have some info that you would find most useful."

...

It's so rude of you to stare, you know, but it's a stare full of awe, so hopefully you didn't offend. She was a friend of Shizuo's, so you wanted to make a good first impression. You had been on an outing with your new friend. It was embarrassing how soon you had texted the man after your walk together, but he had thankfully agreed to showing you around, telling you about his favorite places and others that you should avoid. One of your favorite places that he showed you was a pastry shop. You found his apparent sweet tooth to be very cute. It was near the end of your time together that a woman(?) pulled up next to you both on a motorcycle.

The sight of her badass yellow helmet, paired with her form-fitting bodysuit gave you excited jitters, honestly. Of course, Shizuo would be friends with such a cool person. Shizuo introduces you both, and you learn that the woman's name is Celty. You also realize that she must be mute, as she doesn't communicate verbally, but by typing out messages onto a small device.

"Nice to see you up and well. How have you been feeling?" Confused by the message, you quirk an eyebrow at Shizuo.

"Celty lives with Shinra, that doctor you were talking to a few days ago. She saw you there, but she left before you woke up." he explains. Wait, so she had seen you all passed out on her couch?? How embarrassing!! You pout, trying to calm the burning in your cheeks.

"I-I'm feeling great, thank you for asking--and thank you for letting me crash like that on your couch! Still, I hope you don't think I'm like... a wimp or anything...I usually don't go down that easy!"

Her shoulders bob up and down as if she's laughing and you find it very charming. She types something else on her device and shows it to you.

"Believe me, Shinra told me all about you. I don't doubt that for a second. Anyone would go down quick against Shizuo."

All about you?? Don't doubt it...? What exactly had Shinra told her? Shizuo continues conversing with Celty while you spectate, but you're too caught up in your own thoughts to fully listen. At the mention of a familiar name, your ears perk. You notice the tension in Shizuo's jaw.

"Any idea what that flea was doing here, anyways? You'd think he'd know better not to show his face around here." Ah, so Celty knew him too.

"I don't bother trying to figure out what he's up to. Shinra was on the phone with him recently, I could ask him if you're really curious." Shinra as well, huh? Shizuo shook his head, willing himself to relax.

"Nah, I don't really care, so long as I never see him again."

You had come to learn quite a bit about Shizuo, but one thing you never dared to mention was this Izaya character, not since you both confessed your feelings about the traffic sign incident. It was clear how much even thinking of the man made him seethe with rage. Still, a part of you was growing achingly curious about him and what he had done to garner such hatred from Shizuo, and disdain from everyone else. It would be rude to ask Shizuo about it, though. You would have to wait until you could ask someone else.

Shizuo offers to walk you home, but you refuse his offer, explaining that you had plans with a friend soon. You feel a twinge of panic as you notice him raise an eyebrow and quickly go on to explain that you were helping her with a project. He seems satisfied with this answer, giving a simple goodbye before leaving you alone. It was true that you were helping a friend, but what you were embarrassed to admit was that you were helping Erika with the sewing for a cosplay she was making.

Usually you wouldn't be shameful about doing simple seamstress work, but after Erika explained exactly what a cosplay was, you felt like it wasn't something you would really parade through the streets about. Texting Erika that you were on your way, you put the address she had sent you into your GPS.

"Woah, I never guessed that the mean and scary Shizuo would get a girlfriend! I guess there's love out there for everyone, right Kururi...?"

"Very romantic..."

The sound of new voices surprises you, and when you try to find the source of the voices, you find it a lot closer to you than you expect. Two young girls, no older than 14 or 15 stood at most 2 feet before you. They appear to be twins, bearing matching eyes and hair colors and dressed to adorably compliment each other. Your eyes light up at their cute little hoodies and skirts, each hood shaped with different animal ears. The girl in the yellow hoodie shrieks, holding her arms in an 'X' in front of her face in an attempt to shield herself.

"We've been spotted!! We were so stealthy, how could we have been caught!?"

"Blew our cover."

You find yourself smiling at them in amusement. They were so cute! However, you were concerned as to why they were out by themselves like this, and why they were following a stranger down the street. "I'm sorry, can I help you both...?"

"Help us meet Yuuhei!" Your eyes widened as both of the girls seem to swarm you, tugging at the maxi skirt you wore. "Yuuhei...?"

"C'mon, you're sleeping with his brother so you have to have met him!" You're shocked by the bespectacled girl's accusation. An intense burn immediately overtakes your face.

"I-I'm not...sleeping with anyone's brother." You remember the earlier mention of Shizuo's name in horror, "I'm not in a relationship with anyone."

"Liar." Any hope you had that the girl in the green hoodie was any more polite than her counterpart was out the window. You sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose in frustration.

"I'm telling the truth. I've only known Shizuo for a couple of days. I'm sure he's a great guy, but I'm not that kind of girl."

"So you're saying that you would sleep with him!" Aaaand the burning is back.

"Wha-!! You are awfully vulgar for a middle schooler!!" The girl in the yellow hoodie bursts out into childish laughter and the smile she shoots you seems oddly familiar. She grabs her sister's hand and sprints past you, the latter barely struggling to keep up. After reaching a considerable distance, they turn back to you, waving goodbye.

"Let us know when you get lucky, we'll happily wait if it means getting to meet Yuuhei!!" With that, they intertwine hands again and run off. Flustered, you frantically check your surroundings in hopes that no one heard the young girl's crude outbursts. Goodness, kids were getting more and more mature these days, weren't they? Shaking off the odd interaction, you continued on your trip, now worried about being late to Erika's.

...

So Erika's expectations for how she wanted the costume to look were a little particular, but you were able to work it all out. Working together, the two of you made quick progress. You were very impressed by this secret skill of Erika's, and you made sure that you told her so.

"Thanks! You get pretty good at it after a while." A glimmer in the corner of your eye catches your attention, and you realize it's a necklace that Erika is clasping around the neck of the mannequin. You're sure that you practically have hearts in your eyes as you inspect it closely. "Holy COW, that is absolutely gorgeous!! Where on earth did you find that??"

Erika smiles and shrugs nonchalantly. "Can't really buy it anywhere where it's not just cheaply made plastic, it's unique to the character. I made it." At this point, you've completely lost your chill, grasping her hands in excitement and raving on and on about the mastery and professional level of her work. Erika doesn't seem to mind, but the flush on her face causes you to snap out of your stupor, releasing her hands and apologizing.

You two spend the rest of the evening putting finishing touches on the costume. As the conversation falls into a pleasant silence, your mind begins to drift to other matters. You wondered if, in such a private setting, it would be okay to ask Erika about this Izaya guy. The van gang's distaste for him was clear, but maybe she would be willing to explain some things to you--as a friend. "Hey, Erika?" She hums in acknowledgment, not looking up from her work. "Can you tell me about this Izaya Orihara?"

"What do you wanna know?" You're relieved that she remains unfazed, still focusing on detailing.

"Well, it's just like--a lot of people seem to dislike him. I mean, I'm pretty sure Shizuo was like, trying to deeply injure him. It makes me wonder what exactly he did." For the first time, Erika takes a break. Her stare travels up to the ceiling as she rubs her own chin in thought. Did she really have to think about it?

"Besides the fact that he's basically not a nice person...the guy has this huge god complex. He works as an informant, so he has a bunch of dirt on everyone and that gives him some sort of power over people, I guess." Wow.

"Is that why Shizuo dislikes him so much? Because he has dirt on him?" What kind of dirty secret could someone that the entire city knows about have?

"Hmm, nah. Dotachin says they've been at each other's throats since high school. Sounds like they've had bad blood since the moment they met. But if you ask me," her eyes light up, "I think it's all a big display for their intense, long-lived love for one another!"

"Um, ya don't say..." you answer nervously, hesitant to snap her out of what ever high she was experiencing in front of you. Suddenly, you hear a knock at the door. Glancing at Erika inquisitively, you ask her if she's expecting anyone. Not answering, she stands up and bounds excitedly to the door. Whoever she lets in is silent upon entry. "I figured that we should test this baby out on a model!" she calls from the other room. She returns with a special guest in close pursuit.

"Anri!' you exclaim happily, approaching the girl. You give her a warm hug, which she awkwardly receives. While you're a little put off by her passiveness, you brush it off as her not being used to such contact. Erika smiles at the heartfelt(at least on your part) reunion. "I remembered that you guys knew each other, so I thought that a ladies night was in order!" You had to admit that your visit so far had been a total sausage festival. It would be nice to hang out with some cool girls!

The three of you start the night by having Anri model the costume. However, once you two show it to her for the first time, you can tell she's apprehensive. She tries to be polite, insisting that there was nothing wrong with it, but you notice how her eyes keep shifting to the bust of the ensemble. Working on the mannequin, you hadn't noticed how deep the V-line of the costume was, but on someone like Anri, it would certainly fit a little differently.

"Are you uncomfortable with the bust, Anri?" Her cheeks turn a light shade of pink.

"O-Oh, w-well, I um...It's just that mannequin's body type is a little different from mine...I don't know if it will fit right..."

"Oh, don't worry about that, Anri! We put together this cosplay with your exact body type in mind! It may look smaller on the mannequin, but it's a very stretchy material." The way that Anri's flush deepened revealed how much that didn't help. Poor girl, you wondered how much harassment she must have dealt with to want to cover up so much. You ask Erika to show you a picture of the character that the cosplay was supposed to be of. As you look at the character on her phone, the two things you notice are the accuracy of the design--including the deep neckline--and the character's oddly purple skin. Closely examining the picture, you start to have an idea.

"Erika, do you mind showing me where you keep your fabrics?" Erika is obviously confused, but nods, pulling out a drawer from her dresser to reveal an array of different patterns and materials. Spotting exactly what you were looking for, you grab the roll of fabric and smile at your model. "The ensemble isn't quite done yet. Sit tight, Anri."

You're thankful to Erika for allowing you to make such a change to the outfit. She agreed that one of the key parts of cosplaying was wearing something that you were comfortable and confident in. It wasn't too different from typical fashion, you supposed. Anri sits on the bed patiently, content to watch the two of you continue to work on the mannequin. As you make more progress, she seems to realize what it is that you're doing to change it and smiles. It's a minor change, so it doesn't take entirely too long.

"Come out whenever you're ready!!" Erika says, handing Anri the costume on a hanger as the young girl enters the bathroom. "Let us know if you need help," you add. After the door closes, you and Erika exchanged proud glances. It was like you both were the cool women on those reality tv shows where they gave the homely young girl a makeover. Although, Anri was completely fine before, and she might actually be better off going in public as the before picture than the after.

"I think I'm ready..." Anri says before opening the door. You and Erika lose your minds at the sight of her.

"SO CUTE!!" you both yell, most definitely scaring the devil out of the poor girl. Unfortunately, it would be a bit of a while before you both calmed down. You gently ushered her over to a full body mirror so she could see herself.

"Look at how gorgeous you look, Anri!" you beam, picking up Erika's handmade necklace and clasping it around her neck, "Erika made this herself, can you believe it? Isn't it pretty?" You secretly gauge Anri's face for a reaction. After all, it was important that she herself felt good in it. She gives herself a once-over and to your utmost delight, smiles at herself. The deep neckline that she had previously worried about had been filled with a translucent swatch of purple fabric, meant to imitate the character's skin. There was a bit of transparency to it, but it was still thick enough to cover. Paired with the purple jewels of Erika's necklace, it made for a beautiful match.

Erika, having procured a camera out of nowhere, snapped numerous pictures of the girl. Surprisingly, Anri didn't seem too phased by it, smiling bashfully and letting her take as many photos as she wanted. It was satisfying, seeing her blossom like this in a silly costume. She deserved that kind of confidence, definitely. At Erika's offer to let her keep the outfit, however, she politely declined. Not much of a Halloween person, you guessed.

...

It had gotten so late into the night, Erika suggested that the two of you just sleep over. After cutting on a copy of My Neighbor Totoro (complete with english subtitles for your own sleep-deprived convenience), you and Anri slipped on some of Erika's old clothes and collapsed onto an air mattress beside her bed. You wonder how often Erika's been pranked at slumber parties, because she's out like a light before the title credits are over. You and Anri are still wide awake, however, quietly watching the adorable movie. "I'm just glad she didn't put on one of those weird shows she goes on about. What does she call them? Yow-ee??" you jest. Anri actually giggles and you're very proud of yourself.

"...Looks like we got that sleepover you were talking about," she says. So she remembered that. When you look at her, you see that she's smiling and you happily return the gesture. "Well, it won't be the last! I imagine being friends with boys is a little different, huh?"

"Oh, definitely. Mikado and Masaomi are fun, but...they can still be kind of..." "Stupid? Immature? Prideful? Stupid?" "You said stupid twice." "So you agree that they're stupid."

You both laugh, but a sleepy groan from Erika quickly shuts the two of you up. "...I've never been to one of these before," Anri whispers thoughtfully. The sad smile on her face makes you feel sorry for the girl. "I never really had many friends growing up. Mikado and Masaomi are the first real friends I've had in a while." You wonder what she meant by "real friends." Perhaps there had been others that have gotten close to her and used her. You shake your head in disappointment at the thought.

"Wanna hear a secret?" The pure curiosity on her face is adorable, "I've never been to one either." Her eyes widen to the size of saucers. Without her glasses, you're able to notice the red tint in her brown eyes, even in the darkness.

"R-Really? But you're so... I'd think you'd be really popular."

"Hm?? What makes you say that?" you laugh.

Anri looks away, too guilty to answer. She couldn't admit it, the way that looking at you reminded her of all the girls who had bullied her growing up. Those rude girls who had all that money to buy the nicest clothes, and always had so many friends for no reason. It was terrible how she made that assumption about you, who reached out to her the moment that the two of you had met.

"Well, it's true. I've never been to a sleepover, or had friends, for that matter. If I did, I don't remember." Anri looks at you expectantly, silently willing you to continue. It was endearing, how a girl so polite could be so obvious about her interest in someone's personal life. You could trust her, it felt like, not to judge you for unveiling such a major part of your past. So you told her....

...how a year ago, you were in a terrible accident; one that completely compromised your memory.

#durarara #durarara x reader #drrr x reader #durarara imagines #erika karisawa #erika karisawa x reader #anri sonohara #mairu orihara #kururi orihara #celty sturluson #shizuo heiwajima x reader #shizuo heiwajima #writing tag

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generalzar0ff · 2 years ago

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ok so this is an informal post to get my thoughts down about my ocs cuz I don’t like repeating the same info over and over so. This is just ramblin’!

So uhm. This is Otto Site Autaminde! He used to live in the city and be social with everyone, until trust left him down the wrong path and left half his face scratched off. Absolutely changed and traumatized by this incident, he fled to the middle of nowhere country. Otto isolated himself in his house, and it would’ve been that way forever, if it weren’t for one tower’s watchful eye!

WOW THIS ART IS OLD but anyways. this character either doesn’t have a name or i don’t remember what i called them. Buuut they saw Otto’s incredibly nervous state, how he only went outside to get food from the local farmers, and they were like “i need to help this guy!”

So, as seen in that first picture, the tower gives Otto a device in which the two can communicate easily, and Otto can be guided throughout the land with the tower’s help.

As Otto keeps traversing, he meets some new faces and realizes that most people can be trusted!

Things take a slight shift, though, when Otto finds himself at the outskirts of the city…

The navigation device falls off his belt loop, and in a blunk of an eye, a motorcycle runs right over it. This sends Otto into a panic! And who notices this panic? None other than the motorbike rider himself!

Guy-O gets 2 images because he’s my favorite ❤️

He’s the leader of the pack of a group of greasers that live in the more deserted parts of town. They’re based on the Bremen Town musicians but the donkey, cat, and dog don’t have designs yet 🤷

Continuing on, Guy-O becomes Otto’s new guide after the incident. The two sort things out and eventually become friends as they travel farther into the city!

Eventually, the two land themselves at a restaurant in the heart of the city. Otto used to be a regular back when he knew a particular someone. Someone he never wished to meet again, until that very moment.

Donny LaRots. Otto’s ex-boyfriend. The reason for his unfortunate circumstance. And apparently the new owner of the restaurant in the time Otto was gone.

What will happen next? I genuinely don’t know! Take some other silly guys that live in this universe!

Thalia: She lives in an RV in the desert. Simultaneously chill and insane.

Tango and Victor: The ‘real life’ equivalent of a TV’s Picture in Picture function! They can teleport you and the surrounding area to another place.

Aaaaaaaaand that’s it for now! Thank you so much to the ones who read!

#my art #oc #otto site autaminde #escape from private life

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jessiquinn · 2 years ago

Text

The undying series (Rex x villain reader)

2019-04-18

hello guys! I came with another mess that I fixed... kinda, hehe. hope you like it, if you did please tell me!

Generator rex was such a great series... the memories.

another X villain here,

this is part one of this short series,

Warnings:

1-bad language, 2-suicidal behavior, 3-bad story, 4-bad editing.

hope you enjoy it!

-------------

“what do you think Van shit is planning now,” Rex said while putting his stress on the ball in his hand, “sheesh is 5 in the morning dude chill. Stop worrying and sleep you've been up all night! and we have important training today” bobo covered his ears in annoyance.

“White knight speech today was strange... like he knew something is going to happen, plus it's been so long since he signed us for training, since when do we get training we’re pros at this point!” Rex finally threw the ball away, offended by his thought.

“*sigh in annoyance* for now get some energy, tomorrow we’ll ask him” Bobo finally said after falling asleep.

“I will be teaching you a new fighting technique, it'll help you in the future. the new e.v.o are stronger than before” agent six warned with a hint of worry, suspicious, since when does agent six show any kind of emotions especially worry? that is what circled Rex’s head at the moment.

Bobo and Rex shared a glance at each other, confused.

something is going on.

��last time White Knight said we didn't need this type of training,” Rex said with suspicion, “well now you need it so shut the hell up and listen”

after the training

“go to the main room Dr. Holiday wants you two” Agent Six said causally while cleaning his katana like nothing just happened, meanwhile, they were out of breath, they forgot how fast he was.

in Dr. Holiday’s office,

Dr. Holiday puts a new device on their arms, almost like a bracelet of some kind...

“what's happening Dr, first special training then this weird bracelet?” Rex is starting to feel alarmingly worried.

“All we know is this is a new order from White just watch out ok, you CAN’T and I repeat, you can’t leave without those bracelets, understood?”

“let's not make a big deal out of this you know how much paranoid white is, let's go eat some tacos, your treat, of course,” Bobo smirked at Rex, feeling like a winner.

Dr. Holiday didn’t utter a word, busy with her research.

in the city

“here you are, guys, what took you so long,” a familiar voice said, Noah. “training...there's something strange happening but we don't know” feeling exhausted even though the day just began.

-suddenly the bracelet begins to ring-

a feeling of danger fills the air, what’s happening?

-a motorcycle sound-

“bikers? What the hell is going on” Bobo said, taking his guns out, ready to shoo-hits Rex... he fell on the ground hard

“ugh what was that for!” he gets up as fast as his fall, “look!” Bobo warned a -a lot of motorcycles coming in Noah's way

The world around them turns into neon colors, Bobo grabs Noah and gets him out of the bikers way. “wtf is going on”

Rex activates his powers... nothing happens, a strange masked villain hits him again but this time with a gun.

Rex has been shot! once again on the floor, pain filling his body. tracing the wound... searching for the bullet...what...it’s a needle. his body absorbing every bit of the strange fluid.

drops to the ground

Bobo already called help, but Rex wasn't having it, adrenaline pumping through his body. the bracelet begins to ring, there was an option

"block"

pressing it without thought, instantly feeling bumps of power through his body again, got on his motorcycle, not giving one single fuck about traffic. all that mattered was catching up to them.

The villain kept on taking turns, but Rex was still on their back.

Bobo starts communicating through the earpiece “Rex! we need backup! they’re too many! they keep on multiplying!” “Hold on guys! I'm close to catching them” Rex felt a rush he hasn’t felt for a long time, driving at a speed he’s not allowed to is always exciting.

Finally! a dead-end, The villain stops, guess they didn’t know the street as they thought, a smirk spreads through Rex’s face. they got off their drive and start running, without a notice the motorcycle drifted toward them, making a big explosion.

immediately shielding himself “Don't think you won-” driving through the explosion.

-The villain is already in the building- using his mutation to fly at them, unluckily for him a smoke bomb hits his head.

“I.. should be more careful” feeling pain but adrenaline has never been stronger. arriving at the rooftops to see the villain running away, “if a chase is what you want then your wish will come true”

running to the edge of the building, his smirk doesn’t last as the villain took a jump. “shot” using his wings again, catching up to them.

“Stop!” Rex says before he goes to pin them, The villain takes a risk and jumps, there’s a big gap, shocked Rex too.

The villain falls to the other building, hurting their leg.

Taking the chance, “You can't escape now!” finally tackles them, The villain gets a small device, and points it at Rex, once again feeling weaker than before.

blocking his powers but that doesn’t stop him! he’s angry at this point. kicking the device away, finally using his new fighting technique.

as excepted the villain fights back, he tries to trap you but you keep on getting away.

finally had enough of this bullshit, grabbed his shirt, all that was written on his face is anger and shock, instantly throwing him away.

for once his luck started to work, and Bobo came! an Upside Rex smiles seeing them arrive “Finally!”

looking at the three of them, I’m surrounded “You are outnumbered, surrender” Agent Six points his katana at the villain with full confidence.

Your Pov:

standing on the edge, reaching slowly for your backup gun.

Boss’s number one rule! don't let them get yo- w-WHERE THE FUCK IS MY GUN! -it's on the other side of the building- damn this boy, taking a step back. looking at the ground, there were a lot of their forces.

I'm out of breath, weapons, and the ground is full of their forces.

huh, but I believe I’ve done my mission.

“surrender now” Agent Six once again warned.

I have one solution left... it will hurt but I have to, taking the extra needle that I had, a stab to the neck, and within seconds you were down.

They excepted everything but that.

the poison ran through you, “Get them to the base! fast!”

in Dc. holiday office

“Dc! Quick we need help immediately,” she didn't question anything and started right away.

“They stabbed themselves with the same needle I’ve been injected with or at least the same poison” he was still in shock, she took off the mask of the villain and it was... just a regular person.

a new villain?

Dc. Holiday does everything she can to do to save this life, “that's the strongest cure we have if that can’t help them I don't know what, I'm going to check them for e.v.o, help me!”

“holy shit she doesn't have any nanites” Nanite-free, Six, Bobo, and Noah arrive

“that was one hell of a fight! it's been a while since, what a stretch!” Bobo said while stretching.

“what just happened” White Knight finally arrives,

“You tell us, we know you knew something was up, so explain yourself!” Rex exploded, “They had the strange followers we had never seen before, they vanished out of thin air!” Bobo explained in confusion.

“if I knew something was up, you’d think I wouldn’t have stopped it sooner? Get this villain up!” furiously leaving the room.

After a while...

Your pov

opening my eyes, the first thing I feel is a strong hit of adrenaline mixed with fear, compantion

questions pop into my head “Why am I here? fuck!” “I should be dead!” looking around me, I’m tied to a chair... shit

from past experiences, I can tell what’s going to happen very soon... all I wish for is the package to arrive at the wanted destination, or else... someone is going to die.

getting involved in this mess only made my life harder, put my family in danger, and blackmailed through my family’s life. what else can I do but serve the hopeless hope of them still being alive?

all of this is for them...

an earsplitting sound blasts through the speakers, it already began.

“listen carefully, I will ask you ONCE. where is the needle? wrong answers will be faced with a punishment” the White knight said with rage yet calm demeanor almost chilling to the bones of how expressive his voice does.

You remained silent

one of the most important trainings of this ‘company’ or whatever, is the art of silence... Game is on

“1... 2.... 3″ waves of electricity pump through your body, shocking you into oblivion... yet, not bad, I can handle worse.

Silence

“Don’t celebrate too fast, this isn’t the worst mode we have. I can keep playing this game as LONG as you want” White Knight had a hint of play in him like he was enjoying this torture.

Silence

Without warning shock after shock, the pain kept on increasing every time.

Everyone was watching

“Sir, any more and we might have a body to explain,” Dr. Holiday said

“TALK, I WON’T STOP” White knight officially lost it, why was this so important to him? usually, he doesn't care much and makes us do it.

The pain was unbearable, I think my time is due, I win.

Rex rushes to White Knight and stops him in his tracks, “What the hell are you doing! We still need the information!” he was pissed.

fainting from the pain, let’s hope this time I won’t wake up.

Rex pov

“dr holiday, check if they’re alive! And you! You almost killed them, maybe even did! we don’t know! WE ARE HEROES, not villains! above that, we need them for information! if they’re gone! we lost our only hope and clue” Rex was furious.

“HOPE? What hope! even if they die, we’ll find them sooner or later” The White knight defended himself, Rex wasn’t having it “Yes, hope. how can we know where is their team without them in the first place! are you out of your mind?!”

dc. holiday and agent six got you into the medical center, you were in a critical state, proceeding to hock you into lots of machines from an oxygen mask to IV fluids, etc.

after 10 minutes you started waking up

oh no, I’m still alive, usually, anyone would die from this. meanwhile, Rex was keeping watch on you, “they’re awake”

You have been not tied up this time, dc. Holiday came “I need to check on some things, we’ll try again..”

I’ve done my mission successfully, although what’s left for me is to go home or die I guess... the hope of getting home was less than I could even imagine, guards are everywhere and my weapons are gone.

The boy left after he talked about bringing some people, taking the chance and using the doctor's tools against her, and injecting her with her own medicine.

interesting, she has fight in her. “Y..ou. will not win..” proceeding to fall on the floor.

taking some sharp objects from her lab with me just in case, stealth mode is on, scanning the area near me, searching for any exit.

The problem is if I get caught, my boss’s orders were clear... escape or die

This place seems like a maze, hope is getting lesser by the second, continuing to search for an exit, unfortunately, guards caught on to you, I’m not leaving without a fight!

They had guns and I had a couple of empty needles, they were laughing and mocking me, bad choice. making a perfect headshot with just the needles, mostly eye shoots... you get the gist.

They’re not going to die but they’ll leave me for now, now all the building knows you escaped. running, searching for a place to hide.

“STOP OR I’LL SHOOT” Turning around to see a blonde guy standing next to a monkey...

I knew this gun would be handy, shooting him with a speed he didn’t notice, unfortunately, the trick didn’t work on the monkey, he easily dodged it.

he was far more experienced, he’s a fucking monkey alright! deciding on finding the shelter now! thankfully the restroom was next to me.

closing the door shut on me, there was a vent but it was too small! “listen up... I’m not a jerk alright, I can’t go in the women’s bathroom” the monkey said?????.

wtf, I need to find an escape! And for sure the monkey wasn’t the last of them... the boy is.

no choice, there are no more options, if any info gets out, then my family is out.

dropping everything I have, cutting my sleeve fabric, and stuffing my mouth with it. I have to... taking on of the needles and without any more thoughts, cutting the left nerve... if that doesn’t kill me I don’t what...

all that is left is to wait for Sweet Sweet Death, getting into one of the stalls that’s harder to get into.

by the time you couldn't see anything...

You lost a lot of blood

but

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this is it for part 1, hope you liked it.

if you did please show me love <3

please reblog <3

#Rex #Generator Rex #agent six #Bobohaha #dr.holiday #old cartoon #underrated #noah #xvillainreader #xvillain #rex x reader #rex x villain reader #cartoon network #white knight #great cartoon that got forgotten

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