#Might as well start seeing if anyone is interested in sensitivity reading

[darling-deerest-dead]

WIP Wednesday

(Well more like Thursday). Thank you for tagging me @goldenlionprince

I have so many WIPs I couldn't decide on one. Here is my attempt to explore a desi James, specifically a James that is of Malaysian Indian descent. I'll put a call out for a sensitivity reader when this is done because I'm not Indian.

James’ body straightened from where he’d slouched against the worktable and his eyes sharpened as a wave of resolution passed through him. “Alright then,” he waved a hand airily and a quill and piece of parchment flew into his outstretched palm, “Time to learn how to cook.” “We could always get takeaway,” Sirius pointed out, “Like we usually do.” “Oh, I know,” James said absentmindedly as he composed his letter, “But if you’re learning something, I want to learn something too.” “It’s not a competition, Prongs,” Sirius rolled his eyes at his ridiculous boyfriend but went to stand by his side regardless. He rested his chin on top of James’ messy head and wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, silently reading the letter James was writing to his mother from above. “If it was a competition, I’d not be this nice, tell you that for nothing,” James laughed, and Sirius felt the rumbling vibrations in his own body, “But there’s no good Malaysian food to be found around here and definitely no Malaysian Indian dishes like we’d eat at home.” He leans into Sirius. “I feel like… I want to teach you with something familiar. The way I learned it. Does that make sense?” “As much sense as you usually make,” Sirius teased. James rolled his eyes at that and elbowed his boyfriend gently in the gut, but his smile never left his face as he finished off his letter. Presently, he turned in the circle of Sirius’ arms and said, “Fetch an owl for me please, love.” James brandished his letter and smacked it at Sirius’ solid chest. “Or any other bird as long as you don’t use a crow this time. Dad complained about getting his fingers nipped the last time you did that.” Sirius snickered, “But that’s the fun part!” “Not everyone is an animal whisperer like you are,” James shook his head in amusement, “Spare the old man.”

Tagging: @albi-bumblebee, @groundzero-v, @nyxunderwood

[babe-a-yaga]

What was done to Isseya is one of my personal biggest upsets with this game. I loved her in Last Flight. She's a genuinely interesting, complex character, and given the themes of mistakes and regret present through Veilguard, it makes TOTAL sense for her to make an appearance! What makes no sense at all is for her to be reduced to a two dimensional villain with no clear motivation who's just...doing exactly the thing she fucked up in life? Except worse? I'm gonna summarize the events of last flight for the folks who haven't read it;

The first griffin Isseya put through the joining was already blighted in battle, and dying from it. Quickly. Griffins are extra sensitive to the Blight and any attempts made to join them resulted in the animals going berserk and tearing themselves, and anyone else in range, to pieces to get away from what was now in their veins.

In a well meaning, but misguided effort to save one of the animals she loved, she used blood magic to alter the griffon's mind, to convince it the Blight in it's system was just a regular cold, and it didn't need to fight it, then put it through the joining.

It worked, but it changed the griffon. Made it stronger, fight harder. More difficult to handle. The griffon ultimately went out in a spectacular blaze of glory, and people didn't know what she did, just that she did SOMETHING, and that griffon did ten griffons worth of damage on it's way out.

The fourth blight was far worse, far longer than any of the blights we have witnessed first hand. I think it lasted like 15 years? And it was going badly for Thedas. They ordered Isseya to do what she had done to the first griffon again as a last ditch to stand a chance at I *think* Starkhaven (it's been a little bit since I read last flight, so I'm sketchy on dates and what battles were fought specifically when). She hated doing this, but it was orders, and it was exploit this handful of griffons or watch the world die. She's a warden, she signed up to stop the blight at any cost. In war, victory. In death, sacrifice.

By the time her brother Garahel slays Andoral, she's had to blight a number of griffons, and the constant blood magic use has massively accelerated the blight in her own body. Her brother garahel is this golden haired pretty boy beloved by everyone who looks upon him, and Isseya looks so much like a ghoul at this point people are uncomfortable being in the same room as her. Even though this is completely due to her service to the wardens.

Then, the remaining joined griffons start going mad. And then it starts to spread to the other, non-joined griffons. In using blood magic to convince the griffons the blight was just a disease, she had caused it to become one. A contagious one.

It's one of the most interesting examples of how dangerous blood magic actually is we ever see. We're just told over and over "blood magic bad, slippery slope to killing people. Bad. Even if you use your own." And we never really see explicitly why it's an inherently dangerous form of magic until this.

Back to Isseya though. Garahel's lover's Griffon had a clutch of eggs sired by Garahel's Crookytail. Isseya, knowing there was no stopping what was now in motion with the griffons, set out to do her one last act of penance. She took, and purified those eggs, hid them in a ward that kept them in stasis, so that they might only hatch once the griffons were gone, and this disease had died with them, so they might have a chance. And then she hid the clues to their location, and begged that whoever find them not let them be used by the wardens again.

And then she went on her calling.

These are not the actions of a villain. Isseya EMBODIES the warden principal of sacrifice. But it isn't glorious battle rewarded by a quick death alongside an archdemon for her. It's death by inches, by blight, knowingly and willingly accelerated in her own body to stop it from consuming the world. Sacrificing her ideals, the animals she loves, her brother, Garahel. Isseya gives it all for the wardens, to end the blight, and is not thanked for it or remembered kindly.

And she did everything she could to seed the slightest bit of hope, that both in spite of her and because of her, griffons might return to the world, as free creatures.

Her Veilguard arc feels like really egregious character assassination, and I wish she had been given an ounce of the sympathy that other characters had been given. It made sense for her to be here, thematically, mistakes and regret, and good intentions still leading to bad ends, but she deserved the same opportunity for forgiveness and/or redemption that Solas, Mythal, Cyrian, even Illario got.

Isseya was done dirty by Veilguard.

[foldedchip]

Things in Lackadaisy that I haven’t seen anyone talk about (starting with fun facts and ending with more serious topics)

Rocky was an escape artist for a traveling circus when he was a teenager. This is why he was able to escape the train tracks at the beginning of the story.

Horatio likes to sing, but only when no one is around.

Freckle is the only character to have a middle name in his character bio (Allen). Do the other characters have middle names?

Nicodeme used to be (or possibly still is) a wrestler known as the “Cajun Gator”.

Rocky speaks at least some French; the Savoys speak a mix of English, Creole, and French; Mordecai speaks English, Hebrew, and some German; Nina speaks English and Irish Gaelic; Viktor speaks Slovak and English; Mrs. Bapka speaks Slovak and some English.

Serafine likes practical jokes. The only one we’ve seen her play is the “hatchetman” thing with Mordecai, where she told him to kill a man with a hatchet and he actually did it. Has she played other practical jokes on him?

Ivy’s classmates know that she’s friends with gangsters, because they ask if Rocky is one of her “gangster friends” when she sneaks him into their dorm building. Ivy seems to like the attention.

Nicodeme doesn’t know his exact birthday, and he and Serafine don’t know their exact relation to each other. They could be half-siblings or cousins, or maybe not related at all.

Rocky is very knowledgeable about myths and folklore, and he’s also very well read. Considering he didn’t finish his primary education, he must have either picked this up from his mother, the McMurrays, or he developed an interest later in his life.

Rocky has frightened elderly people before, though he got along well with Mrs. Bapka.

Ivy’s father, Reuben Pepper, wasn’t just friends with Atlas— he owned a train station and helped him smuggle alcohol into the city. He must not do business with the Lackadaisy anymore, either because of Atlas’s death or for another reason. He was business partners with Atlas, but not Mitzi.

The name of Mordecai’s late baby sister, Hannah, is the combination to the safe he writes about in “Posthaste”.

Rocky doesn’t drink due to “past experience”. Did he drink before and then quit, or he see someone else drink and decide never to do it?

Mordecai shows a lot of the signs of autism. He comes across as very cold and unemotional, even with his own family members and closest friend. He doesn’t seem to feel empathy for people he doesn’t care about (often, autistic people will either feel far more empathy than is considered appropriate, or not nearly enough of it to be considered appropriate.) He has difficulty with social relationships and interaction, whether it’s casual flirting, working with others, negotiating with his boss, or developing and maintaining personal friendships. He is physically sensitive and can barely tolerate physical touch, crowded environments, or getting dirty or wet. He is very particular about the way he eats and dresses, to the point where other people point it out. He has an intense and unusual interest in geometry that confuses other people when he talks about it, but it seems to bring him comfort and excitement. (For the record, Rocky is the only one who rolls with it and asks him to tell him more.)

Both Elsa and Viktor have trauma from the war and show signs of PTSD. Viktor also used to stay at the Arbogast house to help keep them safe. When Ivy and Rocky arrive at her house, Elsa asks about Viktor and talks about him later on. This probably means that they were friends.

Corporal punishment was the standard for raising children in the early 20th century, especially in Ireland. Nina slaps Rocky and pushes him down the stairs in two different scenes. Rocky even mentions Nina caning (beating someone with a walking cane) him if he got mud on Freckle’s clothes— which might have been a joke, but it had to come from some truth. Rocky was shown to get into all kinds of trouble as a child, though we don’t see the consequences for it. At the time, “physical punishments” were considered normal, but there is now extensive, undeniable research that shows what kind of psychological damage it causes later in the child’s life. You’ve read the comic, and you know that Rocky is not mentally healthy.

[thanatika]

i will say about the "gentle hands" comment: i'm a bit surprised that people have been focusing on the word gentle specifically, to the point that i feel like it's starting to be overstated as an inherently romantic/suggestive english word in contrast to the completely unromantic "чуткие". they are definitely different words, from what i've seen, since it's only "gentle" that has the connotations of comforting, kind, or soft. but!

i wouldn't call "gentle" inherently romantic — if Daniil had said "gentle hands" about some kindly nurse NPC who was patching wounds, or one of the townswomen NPCs who patch up clothes, or even Clara healing the sick, i don't think anyone would read anything suggestive or inappropriate in that, except that it might be uncharacteristically complimentary for Daniil to say (especially about Clara, who he mostly dislikes). as well as just... a little strange to be thinking about someone's hands that much in general! imo, thinking that about Artemy's hands mainly comes off as suggestive in the context (Daniil's seemingly great fondness for him for most of the Classic Haruspex route, the "that Haruspex of yours" line from Clara later in the demo, and the fact that the writers definitely know people see these two as having chemistry), not because "gentle" is that romantic. he could have said anything — "his hands are sensitive/attentive/delicate" might have been a more literal translation, and still would have raised just as many eyebrows, i think.

thinking his hands are чуткие or gentle or any other translation also stands out because of the context of their conversation, i think. their convo is about how Artemy's "gentle hands" apparently broke a microscope, and one of the first things Daniil can say is to tell him to "Please keep your bear paws off that precision instrument!". so, when he then looks at Artemy and thinks "But his hands are gentle", the thought could come off as him being ingenuine and sarcastic (those hands just broke a sensitive piece of equipment, and are known for being the hands of a "violent killer", besides). alternatively, it gives the implication that Daniil snapping at Artemy about his clumsy "bear paws" is where he's being inauthentic — that he doth protest too much, basically, and is making comments like that to cover for what he actually thinks about Artemy's hands. considering that denial seems to be a fairly major aspect of Daniil's character, i'm more inclined to say it's the second option.

(also, about that microscope: everyone keeps calling the "gentle hands" comment sexually suggestive, but personally i only burst out laughing after i read the "gentle hands" line, when i then turned to read his thoughts about the microscope: "A precision instrument, broken / As if it were used to hammer nails / And we all know who did the hammering". because, well. i don't know if it has the same connotation in russian whatsoever, but in english that can be a vulgar slang term for rough sex, in the same sense of "pounding" (and "pounding nails" is actually used as often as "hammering nails", if not more, so i'd guess they had to choose to use hammer to not be too obvious). the series has definitely not been afraid of making crude double entendres before — all of the "nuts" jokes in the original game, as well as a few more instances which didn't even make it into english that i remember from @katherinakaina's great posts comparing the Classic HD translations.)

back to gentle, though. when i looked up чуткие in the dictionary, one of the definitions was "keen" which reminded me of this moment from classic with Artemy and Eva, and, sure enough, it's the same word! just thought that was an interesting parallel between the two of them, Eva's being described with the same term being used for "the gentle hand of a surgeon". and for the record, i think "But he has keen hands" would have come off even more suggestive than "gentle", considering that "keen" has the connotations of eagerness.

[lemotmo]

😂😂😂

Q. You all keep screaming Buddie Canon. You're even running to the 911 socials and screaming it. Do you actually not know what canon means? You all do understand that the only Buck relationship that currently exists within the ACTUAL canon text of the show is BuckTommy? Canon means actually confirmed on screen. Not in fandom. Not online. Actually acknowledged as fact within the text. Just thought you might find this helpful.

A. I'm very aware of what canon means, thank you very much. I'm also very aware of what context, subtext, and story building is as well, all things you seem to be completely unaware of. So just for the record it is NOT canon that Tommy had a troubled home life. It is NOT canon that he's autistic. It is NOT canon that he was a victim of bullying his whole life. It is NOT canon that he treated Chim and Hen like shit because he was afraid to let everyone else know how sensitive and caring he really is. It is NOT canon that both Chim and Hen forgave him for the way he treated them and consider him a good friend now. It IS canon that he tried to out Buck to Eddie and has now tried to out Eddie to Buck. It IS canon that he sees Eddie as his competition as far as being with Buck is concerned. It IS canon that he was only willing to try again with Buck because Eddie is now 800 miles away. It IS canon that he's condescending. It IS canon that everything about Buck, other than his physical appearance, seems to irritate him. It IS canon that Buck now knows he was never in love with him, not even close. It is also NOW canon that he's pathetic and in fact willing to be someone's second choice so long as their first choice isn't actually physically nearby. This was fun, anon.

Thank you Nonny.

As for Ali's answer?

OOOPS! 🤭🤭🤭

Puh-lease! Most of us have been in the trenches for 7 seasons now. We know exactly what the word CANON means. You know what else we know? We know that CANON isn't always the most important thing of all. We have succesfully been shipping a fanon ship fraught with romantic subtext for years now, throughout all of their failed CANON relationships, such as BT. And look where we are now...

Our patience has finally paid off. Both of them are single and there are obvious CANON signs that one of them is starting to realise the truth about their relationship.

I cannot wait for the next episode! Bring it on!

IMPORTANT! Please don't repost this ask and/or a link that leads straight to my Tumblr account on Twitter or any other social media. Thank you!

Heads up! For anyone who is giving me the shifty eyes for reposting Ali's updates instead of reblogging. Read this.

Remember, no hate in comments, reblogs or inboxes. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of Ali’s posts, you can find all of her posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

[redibanni]

Readers of TCF: Why You Should Read Turning and Vice Versa

Are you interested in Found Family tropes? How about time travel fiasco and everything in between that's happening to badass main characters? Want to get involved and seeing the battle between corrupted monarchy and royalty? Last but not the least, feel the thrill of seeing OP characters kicking bastardized enemies from behind and giving them their own medicine? If so, Turning/TCF should be the perfect novel for you!

I wanted to point out the similarities and differences of what makes Turning on par with TCF's themes! Keep in mind I haven't reached halfway of Part 2 of TCF yet, so my knowledge might not align with TCF's current timeline. With that out of the way, here are the common themes of why you should read TCF/TURNING:

1. Found Family

It's what hooked me into TCF in the first place—everyone's relationship with Cale, a tight knit that wouldn't seemingly unknot no matter how hard you try to separate them. In TCF, we have Cale as the center of the wave, our beloved Commander who had experienced many fights of his own that shaped his world view, and consequently, how other people spanning a whole continent see him as well. Meanwhile Yuder, in his current 2nd timeline, had not only learned to cherish and paid attention to those around him but also communicate and connect to a deeper level he previously failed to achieve in the 1st timeline. You could argue that Yuder's title as Commander's Assistant is almost the exact same as Cale's position as the Young Master. In a way, they have their main support, but it doesn't mean it's only their means of support. What's funny is that they're both picking up strays left and right on the street and giving those said stray a place they could comfortably and confidently call home, and it never fails to make me smile every time they have a new recruit.

Yuder is more active at involving himself with the other Calvary members, it's because of his unique disposition as Commander's Assistant and also a former Commander gave him the power and ability to patiently train people. Not to mention, he is considered as Instructor From Hell for his absolute 0 nonsense and merciless style of train that makes people pass out after training, grow exponentially and come back for more.

If you're wondering if the side character that you just read and loved instantly would disappear, worry not! Kuyu and Yoo Ryeo Han treat their characters carefully and equally, and more often than not, they will reappear in the story! Whether unintentionally or intentionally is the biggest question.

2. Commanders Of The Previous Life And Their Similar Position

They both prefer to be the forefront and lead the fight—often clashing with the enemies head on. They even have more or less similar fighting styles, in which they wouldn't want to draw out fights unnecessarily, have an incredible mountain of patience in dealing with pests and would wholeheartedly throw hands at anyone who insults their loved ones. Not to mention, they're both sacrificial bastards™. They're both generous, in a way they would teach other people how to fight and fend for themselves, thanks to their commanding experience that spanned for a decade.

Their previous lives are a topic of sensitivity—and I can't help but see how they were distant and cold in their previous life after losing the people that were important to them. Similar to being cursed with a series of bad luck (ahem). Cale became closed off, harder to approach yet still providing help and assistance in his own way as the team leader despite that, he had the strong will to live on. The Calvary members' impression on Yuder were negative at the start, thanks to his stoic expression and unwillingness to approach or connect to anyone, leading to a series of accumulated misunderstandings and bad reputation, but despite that, he was their unmoving fortress and cave that shielded everyone until his death. Both gave off the impression of being respected and feared, with nobody that they feel connected to.

In a way, you could conclude their 1st timeline as nothing more than horrible strings of bad luck since you can't exactly fault anybody. And that's exactly the beauty of this tragedy. Their past lives were their own experiences, and not exactly a direct result from a single person.

As a transmigrator, Cale was given a second chance to live his own life through a novel he read. He used his knowledge to manipulate the original timeline and twisted it to his favor, and suddenly, he has a god tier level good luck. Unknowing that he had literally and metaphorically picked up people with him and became a living legend for generations to come.

As a regressor, Yuder woke up after his execution thanks to the hypocrisy of nobles and false accusations. Virtually having nobody to believe him only to wake up in 11 years from the past and became determined to protect the important person that died in his timeline: Kishiar La Orr and stop the tragedies that happened in his past life.

It made me realize they weren't so different in circumstances, after all.

3. Outside POV

We can't forget the hilarious reactions that people often harbor for these two protags! My main source of POV prime entertainment would honestly be Clopeh from TCF and Kiolle from Turning. They have their own interpretation and often hilarious thoughts for the MC, but they respected and feared them the same.

It is through these interactions that we had the glimpse of how people in the novel interacted and perceived them, and let me tell you, it gets hilarious from there. With Cale, and his absolute 0 self-awareness and refusal to explain his actions any further unless necessary vs Yuder, who would shoot down any misunderstanding and still be misunderstood in a silly way.

Misunderstanding is a common theme in TCF but don't let it stop you since it only plays on how other people perceive Cale with no dramas attached. It serves as a pace of narration and even comedic undertones. Turning in particular, is like a breath of fresh air. Fixing the misunderstanding is a theme in Turning, and I couldn't be more happy to indulge in both tropes.

4. Enemies

Ah, yes, secret organizations are a common denominator in both novels, but of course—there's more. Monsters in particular, are present in both novels. It almost led me to believe that if we combine these two novels, they wouldn't be out of place. Gods, mages, priests, sword masters, guardians—you name it, are shared by them like a ping pong ball.

The powerful antagonists don't disappear from taking a hit from one blow, and we see it both in TCF and Turning time and time again about how they're running on time. The conflict in TCF that should be minor became much bigger than anticipated, and I could say the same for Turning.

The fights in these novels have lessons ingrained in them—and that's what I cherish the most. The protagonists grow with the people they surround themselves with, and how those people would repay the favor later on.

What sets them apart is the existence of plates and ancient powers in TCF and omegaverse in Turning.

I didn't consider Awakener as the main difference because, if you think about it, the Ability Users in TCF could be considered as "awakeners" in Turning's world building system. Which is why I wanted to read or see a crossover of them, if possible.

5. Almost Exact Elemental Abilities

How nostalgic, this was the og's in TCF! Cale is never the same without the talking ancient powers he conversed with in his head. As much as I wanted to push how it led to funny interactions and nothing more, it was also the reason why Cale was such a badass despite being dubbed as having a small and weak plate! He mercilessly trumps over his enemies with his ancient powers despite not wielding any weapons: Wood/Shield, Healing, Wind, Fire and Earth. I'm aware he has more than that but I don't want a long list of their attributes AND names yet. What we do know is that Cale would overcome that weakness and grow to be more powerful as the chapters goes on, and that same goes for his people as well.

As for Turning, Yuder is an awakener that could wield all natural elements, namely: Fire, Water, Air and Earth. Although his abilities are at a disadvantage when facing monsters, his dexterity and efficiency in different kinds of weapons and experience makes up for his weakness. Similar to being an Ability User, being an Awakener grants the person their unique set of powers after encountering a battle of will with themselves. So the power varies from character to character. I love learning a new character's ability, and what role they would play in the Calvary!

6. Opposites Of Methods Yet Similar In Goal

Cale wants to live peacefully and achieve a slacker life while Yuder wants to save the world and prevent the disasters happening again in the 1st game (timeline).

If you think that Cale doesn't have the same goal as Yuder, you're wrong. Cale and Yuder are similar in so many ways, that both ultimately wanted to save people and grant world peace if possible. They both made the impossible possible and hilariously enough, in their way to becoming a legend. They both don't see their own actions as praiseworthy and get confused whenever other people praise them. Their own failures and shortcomings are the reason for their self doubt. It shows that despite everything, they're still human.

Cale has creative liberties and more headache inducing than Yuder, but they made everyone worry about them in equal measure. Being confined and forcing a vacation for them makes everyone feel relieved, haha!

7. Romance

Expecting a romance in TCF is virtually little to none, unless you include side character romances, it isn't the center of the novel. I firmly believe that Cale wouldn't entangle with any romance subplots, but of course, as a reader, we have the power of fanfiction in our side and making our imagination a reality. Although there's no romance, the interaction between Cale and his Found Family is a reward in itself.

Turning, however, has the greenest of green relationship regarding our MC and ML! Yuder and Kishiar's dynamic is my go to read whenever i'm in dire need of fluff. Sometimes, they're so sweet that it gives me so much tooth rotting fluff! I can't even stand it sometimes, I need a relationship like them in my life! The relationship between their 1st game and 2nd game are so stark you could hardly believe they're the same person as they once were due to the bad luck set by their first connection to the point it sent you to tears.

And that's exactly the charm. In Turning, love is both painful and beautiful. In a way, Kishiar and Yuder accept each other's flaws and shortcomings without compromising anything, with no misunderstandings and toxic relationships. It's a step up after reading toxic BLs, and frankly, I can't go back there after reading this masterpiece.

if you dislike omegaverse, fortunately for you, it isn't centered to just that and it's relatively new in their current era that makes you forget about it until it reappears due to the minority of people that falls under the category of alpha/omega. It's a refreshing take on the trope we readers knew so well and read how characters adapt to these changes, as well as suffer the consequences. It wasn't until 300+ chapters in the novel that suppressants became a thing, and there isn't even a power imbalance between an omega and alpha. Their second gender doesn't affect their social status and they're treated as normal people because of being a relatively new phenomena.

[monstermonger]

Hey!!

I have recently been going through a rough patch with my art. I am not enjoying or liking how I do linework and shading, and in order to remedy that, I'm collecting works from artists I like that I can study/re-imagine.

Your linework and composition is stunning 😍 and I am currently working on a reinterpretation of one of your pieces. This is the most fun I've had with a piece in a while. Beautiful work !! 👏 👏👏

....Er, I've been away from social media for quite a while, and even before that, I was behind on messages... I'm so sorry for my late responses to asks. I wanna say I appreciate ppl taking the time to send them, really :") thanks for the patience LOL

I'll try to condense this - respond to multiple in a single post. So I don't take up too much space in people's feeds.

so first of all @laurikarauchscat I'm sorry to hear you're in a rough patch, and I think your method of overcoming it is on the right track. At least, it's definitely something I do and it really helps me xD Most notably with all the Caspar David Friedrich-inspired pieces. As long as you give credit to the artists you're reinterpreting from (and asking is polite too, if they're an alive artist :D so yes thank you for asking) it seems perfectly fine to me to do so. Good luck and hope it goes well, I'm interested to see c:

More asks under the cut!

@blurred-antics thank you so much for the words ;b; it's validating to hear, since they're definitely emotions I have in mind while drawing lately. I lost both my parents in the last 2 years, and I've dumped a lot of feelings of grief/longing into my pieces since then, including ones that might seem rather cheerful and perfectly peaceful at a glance. I'm happy others can feel the bit of conflict under the surface-- I don't necessarily mind if my art comes across straightforward, since when throwing art into the public it must be accepted that everyone will interpret it how they want, but it does feel nice to know that some people sense the extra bits. Thank you again!

@kinnersonne thank you very much!! Definitely my favorite subjects at the moment c: You're very sweet.

@marinaaniseed I'm starting to get to ... quite old ones, and I worry this was a time-sensitive question :"D I'm very sorry if I'm too late.

First of all, thank you for asking! I'm honored people like my art enough they'd want it tattooed, it's pretty mind-blowing to me. I've actually had several people ask to use my art for tattoos the last few months and I think overall, I'm pretty okay with it. if you'd like to express support for my art for using it, then you're welcome to buy a print from my shop. It's not required, but it's very appreciated <3 Hope whatever you end up going for (whether my art or not in the end) goes well ^^

@wandersoffdoodling Aw, thank you T.T I'm happy they resonate with you! It's kind of my dream to finish some zines and some bigger projects in this sketchbook/journal art style. So that's very motivating to hear. Thanks again c:

@eldathe once again I apologize for how late I am to respond to questions that were intended to be very quick exchanges lol. First of all, thank you! :") I'm sure this is no longer relevant for how old this ask is, but in case you/(or anyone reading this) would still want to use it as a blog pfp or anywhere, yes, feel free, as long as there's credit somewhere visible! Thank you for asking <3

@starrforge thank you kindly, yours is great too :")

@herebesherlocks Aww thank you so much :") I'm honored it evokes that feeling.

@the-halcyon-effect 100 years later: thank you that's a huge honor to hear :"))))

[artonice]

Am I delulu?

Anyways... seriously y'all. I started publicly sharing B/V stuff in March. I'm just a girly from Boston who is obsessed with ice dance and the athletic, emotional moments it creates. I also enjoy its connection to art. Their 2023 FD reminds me so much of the above painting. I like to post comparisons and Kiki with the girls. Ice dance slays so hard bc I've never seen anything like it before! I really earnestly just enjoy all of the mechanics.

The dedication, the performance. Y'all caught me vicariously living, babes! We all wish we could've been something like a ballerina or an ice skater. Seeing Bella skate, inspires me to do the things that little me dreamed of. Still! Which I enjoy just as equally. Because everyone seems so grumpy all the time and I love having something to cheer for and believe in. I've competed for 2 bike races since following Bella. Because I'm rooting for someone who does cool stuff and think, wait I can do cool stuff too. And the duo for sure inspires me to paint and write and listen to good music and all that other important stuff. Like a good tv show or my favorite book would.

But this is my crutch, y'all. These are very real people. Celebrity and influencer culture makes us depersonalize the figures sharing their lives. I can def see how I get lost in the delulu of their skating story, and Bella's underdog lore (which is mainly why I'm here y'all). I know it's still a risk that skaters can see this post, but I just wanna yap to no one about how weird the modern world is. And I think Tumblr is probably the most private place out of all socials to yap anyways.

So, my point. I feel weird! I feel so weird making edits and talking about how inspired I am by these strangers, especially when the inspiring strangers can see😭. Bella follows my insta account (as well as a bunch of others) bc she's a cool and connective girl broooo like Bella pls don't unfollow girly I'm just saying I don't wanna freak anyone out 😭🫶. Cause I couldn't imagine all these people being so focused on my life and what I do, it might stress me out bad yall.

I know I'm delulu, but more so I'm sensitive. That's why I like this sport. And I like to chit chat!!! Combined with this hyper digital, often fantasy focused world we live in (movies, tv, sports, books) I don't want to be confused with some crazy person who can't decipher boundaries bc I run an active stan account. And no hate to my fellow Stan accounts, this scenario feels unique bc ice skating fan accounts have audiences that often include people in the skater's communities or families, if not the skater themselves. It's not like I'm posting about Taylor Swift who won't see it. Girl, my T-swift is 5'ft tall and can jump 6ft high in the air. Her Eras Tour starts in Lake Placid this July😭. And you bet your ass I need to talk about it!

But I also gotta remind myself that this isn't my favorite TV show but people's real lives. Like fr. Sometimes the competition is so good you'd think it was scripted, y'all. God, like let me keep yapping forever huh?

Anyways, I am so glad I get to connect with my favorite athlete, as I'm sure her other fans appreciate it too. She's honest and open to chat for a reason, it keeps us feeling like we are on the road to the Olympics with her. I'm gunna keep posting cause I love the idea of turning all of booktok on her lore and getting a million people to root for them so I can see them at freaking SKAM 🤨. The conversation between influencer and audience is just hella interesting. And I hope I'm towing the line okay!

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.154 Didn't see it coming

Mama gives us quick hugs when we arrive, then rushes upstairs to get back on grandma duty. Alessia has never been sensitive, so I'm not surprised she isn't trying to help Mama during her time of need. I hope, at some point, she'll start considering others' feelings and needs before her own. I know better than anyone how important fitness is, but I haven't done my morning yoga in weeks, and I go for a jog when I can. She's not a child anymore. She can't stay in the pool all day while Mama takes care of everything. What will she do when Mama's gone? Instead of dumping the responsibility on her, she needs to learn how to do motherhood and get those trade secrets from an OG while she can.

Since Desiree hadn't met her cousins yet, and the point of this visit is to spend time with Mama, I take her upstairs to get acquainted. She doesn't know who they are or what she's doing in this house, but she seems to enjoy the coos and babbles from the other babies. Breanna is chilling on the play mat, so I set Desi in the empty crib, and for once she doesn't fight or cry. She actually smiles. Is she communicating with her cousins? Perhaps this is the beginning of a beautiful alliance. Mama asks me to watch them for a few moments while she tends the garden, so of course I agree. There's an odd calm in the room. I don't think I've ever been around when all three triplets were satisfied. Grandmas are so magical, I tell ya. I take a moment and gaze at them. Just like Des, they are getting too big too fast. Bre and Arvin might look like their no-good daddy, but they sure are beautiful. Lex is Alessia's mini me. Did she name him that because it sounds like her name?

We didn't eat breakfast because I wanted to get to the house as soon as possible, so I go downstairs to put something on the grill. I don't know why, but I've been really into the grill lately. Maybe that whole man and fire thing has some truth in it. Mama had changed her clothes and hadn't made it to the garden yet, so we walk downstairs together. Well, I go down first and she follows, rather; she's a lot slower these days. As I head out the door, I tell her I'm going to put something on the grill. "Okay. I love you," she says. There's something a little extra warm and fuzzy in that one. Even though she says it all the time, it seems kind of odd for her to throw that in there, so I turn around to say it back. I expect to see her shining face, instead, I see the life oozing out of her.

I stand there for a moment, shocked by my mother's lifeless body on the floor. I did not see that one coming. Like, at all. I'm not ready! Why did it have to happen so soon?! I mean, I know "soon" is a construct of my own mind, and it's just her time, but still! Seeing that hurt. It really really hurts.

"LESS!!!"

The grim reaper shows up, looking like we interrupted his beach vacation or something, and I beg him to give her more time because she has four young grandchildren, and she is a full-time caretaker of three of them. My sister needs her. I plead. I implore. I grovel. When I'm out of reasons for him to revive her, he pulls out his tablet and scrolls through the names, taps on her profile when he sees it, and reads the details of her life. It must be an interesting read because he lets out a "hmmm" now and then, giving me hope he finds something that will convince him not to take her away.

"She's had quite a life," he said, making me even more hopeful. "But my hands are tied. She has no unfinished business. It's her time to go, dude."

Less finally comes in from outside as he tells me this, looking every bit as shocked as me. Sophia starts bawling immediately.

"Sorry for your loss, folks," the reaper says. "Now, if you would excuse me."

He gently side steps us, inching towards Mama's body, and a panic runs through me. I can't watch this. I can't watch him take away my mom's soul, so I rush to the living room to let him destroy what's left of our family.

[hwnglx]

oo i just saw your enha and lessera reading, it’s so interesting!! if you have some time could you do a similar reading for enha and ive? they’re my ults!! 🫂

what do enhypen and ive think about each other?

based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!

enhypen > ive

heeseung devil, 6ofw, 6ofsw&empr+char phew, what a start? i keep hearing "arrogant" for him. thinks they're complacent, big-headed.. like they let fame get to their head too much. there might've been a member he found very beautiful and actively approached, but has since moved on from. jay 2ofw, aceofc, 7ofw doesn't seem too close to them, but there might've been opportunities for him to grow closer, that didn't develop much. thinks they have strong and opinionated personalities jake 9ofc, 5ofw, 4ofp&knofc thinks they're very confident and proud people who have a lot of things going well for them, but also have a lot of suitors, and aren't that easy to get close to. might've flirted with some of them sunghoon herm, 5ofc, queofwrx, 10ofp, sun&kingofp thinks they're a very career-oriented and financially stable group, believes they could go on for a long time. some regrets and unwanted distance he's feeling, might've tried to get in contact with one of them more but didn't succeed sunoo temp, death, empr, queofw his thoughts on ive are very balanced and chill, nothing crazy or outstanding. the energy is sweet though, he sees them as beautiful and strong women, who have transitioned a lot over the years. (getting the feeling that getting along with girls comes to sunoo very naturally. i bet he has many girls he's friends with. i can see him gossiping with them a lot lmao) jungwon tower, justice&kingofsw, 3ofp&hangm very strictly "business and no feelings" here. sees them as colleagues. thinks there's a sense of unpredictability to them niki 9ofc, world similarly to jake, sees them as a very fulfilled and successful group, who are aware of their worth. also very wellrounded and capable of various things

in general, i'm getting a lot of respect for their achievements and overall their work. personally, they seem to think they're a group of successful girls who know what they want and what they are, and who aren't necessarily the most friendly, more distant and closed off. more invested in their own world, don't care about engaging with them. very unbothered vibe, in a "we're just doing our own thing and killing it, what about you?" type of way.

ive > enhypen

gaeul aceofw, 6ofc, 8ofw thinks they're very creative and ambitious. might share some fond memories with some of them and still talk from time to time, some nostalgia here yujin 9ofc, 4ofp, 5ofsw&3ofc thinks they're confident and proud of their achievements, but overly uptight and careful. like they care too much about what others think? i keep seeing her think "lol chill and let lose a little" rei 2ofp, 5ofp, 6ofw thinks they have a lot going on, busy all the time. also respects them for coming out stronger and successful after going through some tough times wonyoung temp, 3ofwrx&aceofprx always gives me this vibe she doesn't concern herself with anyone else, in a positive manner. like she respects everyone, very peaceful. still might think they don't really have established stable foundations to go very far, like they keep missing opportunities, and are still shaky. liz 4ofw, 7ofw+3ofsw, fool, aceofc sees them as this happy and carefree group of boys, very bright and positive energy for her. but also thinks they get defensive and feel attacked and hurt pretty easily, like they're overly sensitive in her eyes. leeseo 9ofp, aceofw, hier&moon+fool thinks they're financially sufficient, independent and very creative guys. they have a lot of potential, but are somehow blocked in their freedom.. like they stick to the rulebook a lot, don't take many risks. she believes they could get even higher if they went out the box a little more.

[tarotnoob]

BTS group reading 6/18/24

This is the full BTS reading I did around the Jin discharge/reunion. I think that's important to note since I caught the vibe around that event as opposed to everyone being at their respective bases.

Disclaimer: Tarot readings are not fact; please don't let anyone make you feel they are. Using tarot readings as proof of anything related to BTS or the members is, frankly, silly.

You can also check out the reading I just did for Jimin. There were things that I noticed in Tae/Jimin's readings here that seemed connected. What does that mean? Nothing other than their energies crossed, so I interpreted it as having a convo about some stuff.

Essentially while there's a process to tarot, there's also a bit of guesswork trying to work out the pieces. Not to mention readers operate with their own biases.

RM - Even before I looked at the guidebook for the Oracle cards I got the sense that this is his time to not really give a s*** about anything. I feel like he's working on trying to take things less seriously so much to the point that he might be trying to go out of his comfort zone. I feel like he's trying to simplify things in his life, whether this means literally getting rid of clutter or getting rid of the BS. There's a lot of energy focused on the self. Whether this is more self-help books or working out or even pampering himself in some ways. The spirit card also makes me think that maybe he could be reading more philosophy books or even diving into different religions or spiritualities. If he has time off, I still think that he likes to spend it in nature. 

I really think that there's a lot of energy being put into physical fitness and health. He might even be eating better and simplifying his diet. I think that in terms of clarity he's definitely seeing things about what he wants to do in the future. He might be thinking a lot ahead to the next steps that they could take as a group or just him himself on projects. The candle and spirit definitely gives me Ace of wands vibes. So he might actually be working on a collaboration with somebody. I guess that could be a romantic spark as well. It kind of has a romantic vibe there. But it could just be vibing with people who are on his same wavelength. Talking about life and all kinds of things related to that. I see a greater sense of understanding his purpose and what he wants to do and where he wants to go and how he wants to be perceived. I just really get a no-nonsense don't give s*** kind of vibe. I think people do that when they need to shed something. They need to just start over because he was getting too frustrated and worked up and realized that he just had to go back to the basics or throw it all away. But I mean he's not doing it by being a hermit. Even with the number nine popping up lol. There could be some of that but I still see him being rather a social with other people who think similarly or interesting that way to him. I definitely see him talking to somebody about the future though. Having two figures in each card's could mean again like a partner or one specific friend or could stand in for a group of people but he's definitely making plans with someone besides himself. If not specific plans together then just a person that he likes to talk to about the future. 

I'm also feeling like he's more in a very sensitive and feminine type of energy where he's more open to receiving possibly. Like so more interested in learning and gaining knowledge and getting in touch with taking care of himself both mentally and physically. I feel like you probably also bought something really nice recently. Like some type of luxury item. From a car to a house to like a really nice watch or a piece of art. But I definitely feel like he's spending if it makes him feel better. I know that's getting away from decluttering but I think he's like I don't give a f*** I'm just going to buy things that make me happy and look aesthetic. 

Jin

Jin has strength and nature. This could be specific to a trip coming up in Leo season for him. So very soon. Where he might take a vacation to someplace where you would think of nature. It could be anywhere from Jeju to the mountains to getting away from Korea but I get a sense of somebody probably taking a trip to a location that's not necessarily a busy city. It could be to go camping probably. I think also it means like a sense of wonder. In the book it says something like and every walk with nature, one receives far more than he seeks. And the keywords are gifts wonders and home. I just feel like this is going to be a time of relief for him to do things that are fun and carefree. I wonder if he's able if he goes on the trip will he like do a live or share a diary about it. It could involve music or gathering with people from the music industry as in friends or it could just be a situation where they go to camp and they have a campfire and it's very chill. It could even be like something I don't want to say spiritual but like a retreat where you have events that make you relax like yoga or sound baths. 

That doesn't really sound like him but that's kind of the vibe I'm getting. Or like a get together where people play music but it's not like loud music. It would be like you know if you get by campfire on somebody has an acoustic guitar. So they play folk or soft music together and just sing acapella. I see him having a good and relaxing time. Just trying to get back into the groove of things not trying to rush into something. Not to say that he might not start working on music right away. But I just see him even if he's doing that he's kind of playing around and trying to have fun and relax. Also maybe a lot of appreciation for what it means to have your own time and to not be stuck in the military anymore. I'm sure that sounds obvious but when I did a reading for him right before all the guys met the other day, I actually cried because of the cards that came out. Because it was just such a lovely energy. 

This is somebody who like has really figured out how not to let external things affect him and to just live in the now and like to approach things with such a wondrous and joyous type of energy. I think he is a person of strong character. If there's anything that he wants to do he has the willpower to do it. I don't think he lets anybody step over his boundaries. I think they've already said this but there's an energy of being a kid. I'm not saying he's immature. You could look at him and say the pranks or the things he says are silly and that's immature but it's not from that. It's from someone who just has decided not to let negative things affect him or even if they do because he's human, he won't let them beat him down I guess? Because life is too short? I feel like there's a lot of wisdom people could get from him if they sat and had a chat with him. And you could get him to be a bit serious. I think he doesn't want to be serious. Not because he's avoiding anything but just like he doesn't want to be lol. That's not his vibe. But yeah I think he's ready to rest and relax and recharge right now and so I would definitely expect him to take a trip very shortly to a location where he can feel relaxed. 

Yoongi

I'm a little surprised to see joyous especially given the tarot cards. But joyous here the keywords are appreciation, overflowing choice. The intention phrase for it is choose to spread your joy contagiously. You will keep your spirit healthy. Your joy will make others happy. The quote that goes with it is from Carlos Santana and it says if you carry joy in your heart, you can heal any moment. 

On the one hand I can't tell if I'm being biased especially given his tarot cards but then how I feel he probably feels about his military service. So part of me is wondering if this joyous card is a bit sarcastic. But when you read the description it's a lot like gratitude or being optimistic. Which I do think he is. It's living and practicing an existence of being joyful needs to come within. Celebrate being alive and having the freedom to make your own choices. Follow the path leading upwards and see the candy jar as half full rather than half empty. Positive thoughts and actions will attract higher vibration surrounding you, granting you pure joy. I have wondered from things he's said for years now if he has not necessarily a spiritual practice but more like a mental practice of letting things go and not having attachments. 

So I think he has adapted some of that to life. The tarot cards kind of indicate I don't want to say bitterness. But we have the nine of wands which is a little bit defensive or having seen some s*** or being determined and the devil tends to have those like negative self thoughts. The joyous part could be advice for him for how he feels right now. I can only imagine how someone like that feels when they have to do something that they don't believe in. I don't think he gives a s*** about military service. He probably doesn't think that he should be doing it. He probably doesn't believe in anything that has to do with authority or nationality or patriotism. I'm not saying he would be a critic or anything although there's much to criticize so it wouldn't surprise me. So I think this is kind of a difficult thing for him to wrap his head around so he's just trying to see the silver lining. Which is probably that eventually it will be over. I think he's trying to find things to be grateful for. I think he's looking forward to the end. 

I have always wondered if he has a companion or like a partner of some kind. I don't think it's a friend. I do lean toward a companion, I feel like they've been together for a while, and I feel like this person provides comfort as much as possible and could be the joy that he finds in what is probably an annoying experience for him right now. I think probably this person is the only one kind of keeping him grounded. I think the relationship could be a little codependent in that regard. I also feel like there's something hidden. Something sneaky or secret. This could be anything like something he's doing in secret. That could be the relationship. Or somebody involved is doing something that he's not aware of or he's doing something that other people aren't aware of. It's interesting that in all the cards there is this little extra animal. Which is part of why I'm leaning toward there is somebody significant in his life that provides comfort. That or he just got a dog lol. 

15, 9 and 6 could be relevant so maybe something happening in September between September 6th and 15th. Something that could be a secret being revealed. I'm not like super confident in that I'm just guessing what the numbers could mean if anything. I'm kind of seeing five of wands as well within this nine of wands, so there could be other types of conflicts happening. These sticks are burning and this is a snowman and that dog is also made of flames so technically the snowman could melt under the heat. And the devil obviously hell. Kind of silly but like literally he could be somewhere right now that is extremely hot lol. He could feel under pressure or feel the heat. There could be some type of temptation. It could be that he is involved with someone or something that could potentially cause harm to him. Of either a slight degree or more than that. Something that he's doing or indulging and might be kind of iffy but at the moment it seems to be bringing him joy or happiness or a way to get through stuff. I don't really know what that could be. 

Besides indulging in a relationship that's codependent, it's not like he could really be doing drugs or abusing substances. I think it's something else it's like tempting but at the same time it's harmful. I don't know what that could be given him not being able to do much. It could also be that like he's in a situation where he can't react the way he wants and feels confined. But that's me just like assuming things. I'm not really feeling anything. The devil is also a card about restriction so again maybe feeling restrained and kind of at his limit. I mean that sounds really dramatic, this is obviously somebody who can handle anything but like I just can only imagine him being incredibly irritated that he has to do this stuff. I just hear him being really sarcastic in my head about the idea of joyous. Like yeah what a joy this is. But he knows he's going to stick through it so what can he do. I mean he can't go into it completely like I hate this because he'd be miserable. 

Even though I think he's miserable but he's trying his best to find the things that make it endurable. I also wonder if with this person whether it's a new person or like I felt like an old person that maybe this person has like melted him in some ways and made him softer. Maybe because this person has seen him through good and bad. But I would definitely guess that if it's a person it's a bit codependent. Like they don't want to go out with everybody they would rather just stay in by themselves and only interact with each other. Kind of like when you invite a friend and no matter how many times you invite the friend they always want to ask if they can bring their partner. Which some people might be like what's wrong with that well that's weird. Okay it's weird. You can separate for a night to hang out with friends. And often your friends don't necessarily want to hang out with your partner. But yeah I'm not really getting much other than like irritation and sarcasm and just dealing with it and probably a person involved in his life that's pretty serious and is sticking close to him. But something about it is a little maybe toxic. Because again the snowman wants to take care of the little flame dog but the flame dog does end up melting him. But he seems to really like this person and I would guess it's a woman Yes. She might be older than him. I know all the little animals and stuff look younger but like I feel like she could be older 

It could even be that he's actually the little pet in every single card because of how much he seems to look up to her or be like obsessed with her. And if in her eyes that she's rather powerful and like caring and taking care of him. That's why I kind of think she's probably older by at least 5 years it could be more than that. Anyway. I think I said that last time I did a reading about him where I felt like he was talking to somebody about creative projects. And I think it's the same person probably so. Don't ask him to marry you because I'm pretty sure he's already got somebody in mind and it's pretty serious and probably long-term. But it's just a guess and a feeling. I don't feel 100% about anything going on with him. 

But I do probably think he's taken. However I feel like it's a non-traditional type of relationship. As in like they don't like labels or it could be open. But it just doesn't feel traditional hetero dynamics. I think they would call it like a companionship or even like one's a superpower and one's a familiar. She might also be kind of spiritual or has that same type of interest in those philosophical ideas without being spiritual. She could even be a little witchy. She could be into Japanese religions or spirituality or be Japanese I say that because of the fox. And they have legends about foxes being able to change shape. And this animal seems to keep changing shape in the different cards from being a dog to a fox to whatever is with the devil. So in that way in terms of non-traditional this woman is just not into labels. Maybe they're even non-binary? I don't really feel like that though I feel like they're quite feminine in nature but it's more not believing in labels and thinking everything is a social construct with a bit of scientific spirituality thrown in lol. I just don't see them as into incense and tarot yet they apply certain philosophies like that to things. Anyway interesting. 

J-Hope

I am not surprised that he would somehow pull the focus card out of a lot of really like spiritual worded Oracle cards lol. I am always thinking of him as being high focused and a little not uptight but like wound a little bit tight yeah. Very respectful and kind of serious. But deeply charming. As for the photo we have somebody who is in a white gown with flowers. And we have the four of wands, so it's almost giving like a wedding vibe. I think I said this in a past reading about him too where I thought there was some kind of wedding so I don't know why that keeps coming up with him. If you look at the four of wands as well that guy has like white hair and it reminds me of J-Hope when he had that white blonde hair before he enlisted. So there's definitely I mean I would look at it and be like okay well somebody is putting their attention into like an event that looks like a wedding and there's a little bit of anxiousness and anxiety about it. I don't know is he going to get married, is he going to a wedding, is he going to be in a wedding? The other thing could be there's some type of celebration or contest coming up where he would perform and there's some anxiety and he's just focused on that event right now. 

Reading the book for focus also sounds a lot like somebody and the steps you would take to manifest something and make something happen. Especially like achievements or things that you want to accomplish. So it's putting in the effort toward that and being aware of what you want. So there is a moment of celebration that he's working toward and focused on. This could be like any of them where it's a focus on being discharged and celebrating that moment afterward. And maybe he's like super highly anxious and focused on that specific countdown day. So I think he's really looking forward to the end. And at the end there could be some kind of celebration that would include a wedding. I don't know if it's he's seeing somebody I don't know. There are lots of people in our lives who could get married but it's just interesting that he got four of wands and this card looks so much like a bride carrying flowers. They're both carrying flowers. So there's nervousness here. I mean we won't know until he gets out but maybe he has promised somebody that at the end of his discharge they could celebrate something. It could be anybody else throwing a wedding or party but I'm just saying it's looking like I want to imagine a situation where he is with a woman Yes a woman probably very likely and they're both looking forward to this moment and there's a celebration and there are flowers and there is somebody in a white dress so I'm just saying. 

It's interesting that the focus card talks about manifestation and creating things when the character on the four of wands is the person who created BMO and a lot of robots. So there's this idea of creating a dream reality. Creating his own happiness. Highly focused on what's going to make him happy and what's coming up in the future. There's also an interesting take on flowers. It could be that being with Jin now he has flowers in mind and that's how he associates the end. It could be a focus on beauty and happiness and things that are good. Also to have flowers you have to put in the dedication to grow them. And when you do that something really beautiful comes out and you've created something.they are white roses so it could signify like a friend getting married. 

Of course I like don't see anything in the cards to indicates to me a person that he's seeing now or whatever. I'm just like literally this is exactly what it looks like on the cards. But like I said it could be a friend's wedding. Once he gets out and he's looking forward to that. Or it could be way in the distant future that there's some type of marriage. We have the numbers four and the numbers 9. So this could be something for next April or it could be something in September or the event could take place on the 4th or 9th of a month. I don't think he's getting out until early October maybe. I'm not sure of the specific date. But maybe he's getting out on like the 9th or the 4th I don't know. But there is no way a guy as amazing as he is is not dating somebody. Like I don't know if any of them were dating and they took a break because obviously it'd be difficult to keep a relationship while you're enlisted. Especially for JK and JM who are like in the middle of nowhere and mountains and apparently it's hard for them to get a lot of time off. 

I'm not sure what to totally make of the nine of swords beyond being like a generally anxious as a person always he seems to be. But this character has a harp and the swords kind of make me think of communication and writing. So I think when he gets anxious he might be writing and working on things like at night you know when he's in bed and about to go to sleep. I also think this just indicates dreams. I'm really focused on the wavy one the second one from the bottom. I don't know why. Although it does kind of remind me when you like put a song together and you see the waves of the sounds. Also in the nine of swords on the bed there's another woman who looks like she has a bridal dress on lol. It's clearly princess bubble gum but it looks like yeah so I'm sorry but I definitely think there's a wedding coming up for him. It would be weird to be that focused on a friend's wedding unless it's like your best friend or you're going to be in it or you're worried about whether you're going to get out in time to make it to the wedding. But somebody's getting married 

Jimin

Okay for Jimin. We have the sun which can indicate Leo timing or Leo signs and we have Divinity. Kind of interesting already because flame princess is a royal person and people used to think that being royal was a divine right or divinely given. Despite there being a moon in the divinity card I also get the sense that it could just as easily be the Sun instead of the moon here. Or it's just a mix of the sun and the moon meaning feminine and masculine energies happening at the same time. Because the divinity card would definitely make me think of high priestess right which is a very feminine energy and in the sun is that powerful masculine energy. So there's like a balance theme happening here. 

More about the divinity card. So the intention says embrace your soul and true self. You are filled with the ability, strength, and knowledge you need to navigate your life's path. It's interesting that it says strength which is the other leo card. So I think clarity and bravery and being bold and getting out there or bringing something into the light could be a part of this. This could be more about the balance of those energies. If we're talking about the high priestess which usually means secret and we have a card about clarity, there could be a revelation of some sort that's happening for him or about him or will happen to him. It's such a nice balance of energy lol. Because there's such a softness and empress vibe and high priestess vibe rolled into this divinity card. It's very soft and elegant and then you have this powerful loud sun card. And flame princess is focusing on this crown and this particular red jewel but she's also not wearing it on her head. We see that there is red prominent on both cards. There's also a little bit of yellow and then a bit of green but I'm mostly seeing red which is the root chakra. Yellow would be solar plexus green would be heart.

I'm also wondering if he's kind of in the mood to dye his hair red lol. Or like he was just talking about what color will I dye my hair when I see you again and I'm wondering if right now he has an idea in his head that it will be red. Or is he like I'm between red and blonde because we see yellow here too. Another line associated with the divinity card is never forget that you have the spark of divine in you. Whatever you do or don't do won't change this fact. And the keywords are wise, sacred, deity. I kind of feel like both cards are talking about a deity or a god or the divine or fate or whatever you want to call it. Spiritual wisdom. He always has very spiritual cards and more often than not I typically get cards for him that are like the sun, the moon, death. Like with other members I tend to also get a seven card with him at some point. 

The number for the Sun card is 19 or 1 and 9 or 10. So any of those numbers could be significant in some way. More about the card it says you are quite surely a goddess with extraordinary powers and in other worldly realm. Hold yourself to the highest standard of exquisite excellence. You are walking on this earth to make the difference that was intended for you to achieve. Stand tall on the highest mountain. This line is interesting. Once you reach the apex, you will discover the entire spectrum of the rainbow waiting just for you. It's weird because I think that the universe has special intentions for him which can probably create a lot of tough burdens and challenges and lessons for that type of person. There's a lot of focus on embracing who you are and you know embracing the feminine aspects and the beautiful aspects and the graceful aspects. So the card is really encouraging the feminine traits or skills or talents of his personality and even of his physical looks. 

But then like you see this other card that definitely represents all those masculine traits. I'm not necessarily seeing a conflict. I'm pretty sure that he's mostly resolved a lot of the issues he used to have about what it means to be masculine versus can I accept these feminine aspects of myself and how will these be perceived. I kind of thought that would come up again going into a place like the military where you can't paint your nails, you can't wear makeup, you can't dye your hair, and I thought he was maybe worried about what he would look like without his hair and not being able to present himself as an idol. I don't see conflict here maybe if I clarified. I see someone embracing both sides. I feel like sometimes the fandom misrepresents him and it's interesting because everything he stands for is in contradiction with what the fandom likes to do to him. 

Because he is sometimes seen as “slighter” physically or because he did contemporary or ballet or because he has that feminine type of face that's very beautiful and artistic or he wears jewelry. But sometimes the fandom likes to treat him in this very heteronormative type of way where it's like okay well he's a little bit more “fem” than the other guys so that must mean that maybe he's gay or somewhere within that LGBT spectrum which is none of anybody's f****** business but anyway. But like what he has always said is that labels can be silly. There's a moment in maybe it was bon voyage the first one where he said you know what does it mean to be a man. He's always saying let men cry. 

And that's not to say he's always been that way because I remember this moment in an interview and JK was being asked what do you think about bikinis and he said something like I know all I need to know about bikinis and then jm says something like they don't even see us as men do they. And we know that at the beginning he thought he (Jm) had to be a muscle pig and ironically he's kind of switched roles with JK and JK became the muscle pig (but he doesn't seem put off by showing a fem side these days). So I don't know what's going on there with the flipping of the roles… or that both of them have kind of learned from each other about embracing both sides because I don't know if you saw the Calvin Klein cropped shirt photo but it's one of my favorite photos of jk and I think he looks amazing. Just as amazing as when he dresses in all leather and masculine fashion. But anyway my point was going to be you can't put people in a box because of your conceived notions of what you think people could be based on looks or how they act. 

So I can understand why he's also interested in both sides and you know how do I balance this and where do I fit. And I think you can have those qualities and be extremely powerful and still quite masculine in that energy. I just think he conveys both and he always has to me. I find him very beautiful in his dance and then when he puts on makeup and dresses up it's just beautiful. I don't think oh well he looks girly. And then you see him in in the soop wearing a baggy shirt and some shorts and chopping wood. Or he's got a baseball cap and a jacket and he's just like looking like any other well-dressed guy. 

What's my point? I just think it's probably always going to be a part of his life or the earlier part of his life to figure out the balance of those traits and what society tells him they mean but what he feels they mean could be completely different to that and then just balancing that within himself. I also just think he has spiritual powers lol. There's always something so sexy about him and that's probably the wrong word but it's because I just think the moon really fits him so well. But then yet it's clear that Sun is another aspect of his personality. This is a person that's meant to shine and can be bold but is quite like on the other side of it quiet and soft and elegant. Because you could look at these two figures and these cards and look at divinity with the cloak and then you look at the flame princess and it looks like that figure could be cloaked in flames but also it could be that flame princess is wearing this cloak and then she's taking it off. Maybe red is also his favorite color lol. 

So it's like somebody who is a feminine being or body or embraces that feminine energy being cloaked in a color that is a masculine energy. I also see it as somebody who's extremely passionate but it's like a quiet passion. Not that you'll never physically see his passion but it's such a strange thing to have to describe. But I'll just say it reminds me of dancing. Like specifically contemporary dancing. You have to make these fairly simple movements and portray them just using your body and emotions. And you have to do that in an elegant and sleek and slow way. And you have to contain it. It's like a contained passion right. And flame princess is also a very passionate character. And she probably had a moment too where she didn't know if she wanted to wear the crown and take over from her dad and so there has to be this choice of you know am I going to wear this crown and do this. And that could be about: do I want to wear this label do I want to openly wear a label of how I describe or see myself. But in Divinity there's a bit like it is hidden by this cloak right but then looking at this crown maybe I'm looking at the day where I don't have to hide in this cloak. I'm not trying to make this a metaphor, I'm not assuming anything about him because hiding things about yourself makes sense as a celebrity. you can hide all kinds of things especially when you have this complex about if people see parts of you that they don't like especially when you're a person you're a Libra of course and you don't want anybody to dislike you so you're afraid to show certain parts for fear of turning people away from you. 

Even if you're confident in yourself so I feel like one side of him wants to be able to show everything that he is but then there's this other part that wants to keep it hidden right to keep it secret for whatever reason. But there is hope here I think and looking at this crown keep feeling like this is somebody who's looking at something and dreaming of what could be and since it's a card about clarity it also feels like being able to live in the light and do this and be bold about it and like wear that crown. I still don't feel any conflict between the cards like I'm either this or that or I'm ashamed to live in the cloak. I just think they're two parts of him and I think he wants clarity and wants success as well. There's like quiet hungry passion for success. Yes I mean like physical success and awards and validation. Being the best, and having it to do with performance for sure. Like he gets super excited about the idea of performance and super excited about the idea of awards and winning things and being acknowledged in that way. I can also see the love of roleplay and even of costumes. Because look at how dramatic that is to be wearing that cloak and then her little warrior outfit. It almost looks like a kendo outfit though doesn't it too. 

Maybe he'll win a martial arts award while he's in the military. I also feel like maybe he'll win an award. I think I said that in his longer reading but like maybe he gets an award for a job well done for something. Oh you know and now that I look at the sun I'm starting to see Jack skellington's face in the Sun with like the stitches as the mouth and the little eyes. Anyway. There's a lot I could look at for in his cards and I feel like his cards always convey this type of feminine masculine energy with the moon and the sun. How he can be this quiet person walking through the woods but at the same time he could be this regal royal hot-blooded all in red flame princess right out in the sunlight for everyone to see. So it would make me think you know yeah he might perform wildly on stage and be very loud about it but he's also a very private person. I also wonder if there's a place he can go by the base. 

I personally think and have seen in the cards that there are a lot of mountains and I think I've already heard people say that but I wonder if there's a spot with trees that he can go to to take a walk. Even in the Sun card it looks like a barren rocky mountainous place and you have to put on this uniform. But then there's this very peaceful woods area with trees. If he doesn't have that then maybe there's some way that he can find this type of peace even at the base. Like looking at this little object like the crown can help transport him. So this could also be him on his phone when he gets to read it at night he's reading stories. Like manga or fantasy fiction novels. Or maybe putting on these costumes and going into this role as performer is also kind of like a safe space that he dreams about. 

You know since I thought his album was very cinematic in the way that the songs told stories or how visual it was or how concrete the video concepts were. I'm also seeing like okay this divinity card represents his imagination and flame princess is looking at this crown and imagining scenarios. Like if you are a writer sometimes you can imagine scenes like movies in your head so it could be him imagining himself in these different roles like being this cloaked figure and playing RPGs but also that feels tied to how he imagines songs or his love of movies. It feels very creative. Or maybe he can imagine things like paintings. Maybe he's inspired by art. There's probably just a lot of stuff about him that we don't know. I would love to have a chat with him because I find him pretty relatable. I think he's a tough cookie, I think people often underestimate him and treat him like s*** especially people in our own fandom, but this is a really strong and caring and creative and talented person that seems to also have some type of blessing from the universe. Like if he actually took up tarot and tried spiritual practices I think he would be able to do it intuitively or his power/gifts comes from his ability to interact with people and heal them oh well.

Anyway, I know that wasn't specific but I just think it's a bit of a time for him to figure out some things about himself and who he is and what he wants to show. Again, I'm not saying that the cards say he is XYZ. But the cards just say that he hides some aspects of himself, which we all do. And I think that that can be a struggle for him. But I think he has an ability to visualize very strongly and that might be why he is able to manifest certain things. I think he sees songs or scenes for songs or videos very concretely. But that also tells me that he probably visualizes things that he wants or things he hopes for the future very clearly as well. 

Do I think that any external debate from the fandom or anywhere else reaches him and still affects him in terms of that feminine versus masculine energy? I don't really think so. I doubt he pays that much attention to comments anymore or at least I hope he doesn't. Besides that aspect of feminine versus masculine, there also seems to be a layer of public versus private. However, this has gotten pretty long so cut it off here especially since they already did a longer reading for him. 

Taehyung - 

I took a couple days break before I did the last two. So tae has some interesting cards. For the tarot, there is high priestess and death. Uniquely spiritual cards, about wisdom, also about things that are somewhat secret. That's a little bit interesting because I feel like it's slightly tied into some things with Jimin. But putting that aside let's just talk about the tarot, high priestess can indicate knowledge, or secret knowledge, intuition, having to do with the moon, feminine energy. While death represents Pluto, cycles of death and rebirth, what they have in common is both cards indicate something being hidden or subconscious. So we definitely know that there is something pointing here to things that are hidden or covered or secret or quiet. So we have to look at the oracle cards, one says goddess. The other says serenity. Goddess gives me the vibes of going back to high priestess or empress even but looking at it you might also think about three of cups or even three of pentacles. Serenity kind of makes me think of hanged man. What also comes to mind is the serenity prayer, which ironically has the same sort of message about letting go of things that you can't control.

I put the Oracle box away and just kept the pictures but now I need to look up what the oracles are. Honestly I wasn't really going to post the group readings but I kind of feel inclined to after seeing that Jimin has a new album coming out. So I feel a bit excited about talking about some of these things coming up in the readings. 

To talk about serenity, the keywords are acceptance, peace, choice. The intention says make peace with your situation, unless you can and want to make a change for a better outcome. Serenity comes when you trade expectations for acceptance. 

So before we move on to the next Oracle I'm again getting the same thing as the tarot which is I feel like he's totally embracing military life and what's happening wholeheartedly. It doesn't surprise me that this matches the energy of his letter. It's different than jins outlook about him going into the military or his general state of mind which is often you know live in the moment. But even when Jin lives in the moment It's as if he is having a reaction to the world and it's not like a genuinely carefree attitude. It's something that is practice by him and is almost like a meditation or when you have to practice a certain mindset. Whereas with Tae this feels like organically I don't give a f*** That's not putting it right because it's not like there's this rebellious thing. It's just like excitement for the unknown and what is to come and just like completely having his arms open to it and going with the flow. Which is probably something he's always done throughout life. And I think that explains some aspects of what's going on here. The secret stuff or the hidden stuff is a little bit something else. Which we might find in the last Oracle so let's see. 

Also sometimes when you get multiple secret cards it's also possible that someone doesn't want to show you something or it's unknown. So with goddess, the keywords are sacred, light, warrior. it says every stage of life lays the foundation for the next stage of life. Treasure each stage of life. And the intention says magic runs deeply through your veins, be wild and free. Awaken your soul and embrace all of your journeys around the Sun, whether they are traditional or all your own shining uniqueness. We are all warrior woman. 

Mentioning the sun when Jimin got that, I'm again maybe drawn to something connecting jm and tae in this reading. I'm not sure what that is and maybe it plays into the secret. Definitely since the goddess tends to look like three of cups and one of the women seems to be pregnant, which could be kind of like an empress vibe, you have to wonder if lol he's full of secrets. That might have to do with Jimin. There's also more moon energy because the goddess card talks about triple moon goddess. Which again makes me think of high priestess and empress. Then it says fundamentally, she is the same person entwined and wrapped into one being. Each life stage is associated with a phase of the moon. That's fascinating because literally we have death which is about life cycles and he got besides the moon card the other Moon card. The death card is a card I associate with Jimin. So again there's like some tie here in this current energy in this current reading that seems to be connecting tae and JM. I'm not entirely sure what that is or how it connects to what I said about Jimin in this reading. It could be that the things that Jm is hiding within himself or cloaking or however you want to call it, that these are things that he has recently shared with Tae. Over the phone or through a message or whatever. So that might be why they are connected a little bit. Or a lot, hard to say. I do see in the goddess card we have three people discussing things amongst themselves. I think it's like a deep conversation because we have the moon. I'm not getting three of pentacles unless there's some practicality to it but I see three people discussing something deep and important. 

The middle person seems to have a lot to say it could be because she's pregnant. They might be talking about something not just deep and emotional but having to do with the cycles like life and death or what are we going to do next in the future. My guess is they probably did have a deep conversation in the last couple of weeks. Because I'm definitely feeling strong ties at least on taes side where we're talking about secrets and cycles and maybe a little bit of abundance but that's kind of vague. We have elements of letting go of control and kind of accepting what's coming. So I think they probably shared some thoughts about life and who knows. Like I said you know with Jimin, it felt like he was reflecting on his place in the universe so it's very likely these two had some type of deep, emotional, extraordinary conversation lol. Like the kind where you are on the phone or your FaceTiming and possibly staying late into the night. I don't know how that would be possible with military or maybe they had it in the time that they were together. I think I pulled the cards for the group after the reunion. That doesn't mean I know when the timing is I'm just saying they spent time together so maybe that's possible. 

I think it also means that tae has been fairly sociable in the military. I think he is connecting easily with other people. I think that even so, I don't think he is getting super close to these people. It might be a very superficial type of relationship. I'm not sure on what deep type of level he's connecting with the people that he's meeting. But he's probably having fun. I almost wonder if he's purposely like not opening up. It might seem very much that he's being social and like talking to people but it almost feel like there's some barrier he's put up with new people that he's meeting where he presents as having fun and letting go but like inside I'm getting this feeling that he can't open up to just anybody. Unlike say a conversation he could have with Jimin. Where they have very deep conversations obviously based on years of trust and being okay to be vulnerable with each other. And I find I'm getting emotional lol that they are so deeply trusting of each other. That they probably know all kinds of secrets about one another. And definitely ride or die. I know that's very probably obvious to people. It's just interesting that I'm feeling this bond when those two are separated right now. But I don't think that that matters much when they come together. And I think that Jimin still reaches out to tae when he needs to talk and vice versa. 

I mean it also in the goddess card there is a sense of gossip as well. Like news being shared amongst the three women. Almost like you know besides having deep conversations there's this sense of urgency like oh hey I heard this thing by the way and then you call up your friend and you're like hey I heard this have you heard this is it true. I don't know what it would be about. It could be related to those deep conversations. Or it could be something separate. 

I think a lot of the feminine energy that's coming through really has to do with receiving. I think this ties in to being open to accepting whatever is coming his way. But I also think literally he's receiving things like secrets and information. This could be from people around him or it could be specifically other friends or members. Again I feel like a tie to Jimin. Jimin has shared something with him that's a secret. Probably. Again not necessarily gossip but information and secrets. Which can be hopes and dreams or fears or all kinds of things. 

I also wonder if he's a bit lonelier than he gives off. I don't doubt that he's probably making the best of what's happening and is probably genuinely enjoying these things. But I get the sense of somebody who's a bit alone. You don't get the moon coming up constantly to not have like some little bit of you that's lonesome. Do I want to say feeling misunderstood? Sort of. Not as in oh I feel so sorry for myself but more as in not always feeling like he belongs. Feeling out of place describes it better. Like imagine if you were an alien. And you looked like a human. You came to this world. You look like everybody else. But you just don't belong or that's how you interpret it anyway. I mean Tata is coming to mind but that's just how I feel right now. He might say all these fun things in a letter and it might be very convincing but I just feel like he's a little bit alone. Alone might be different than lonely. I mean it is different. 

So I feel more like the word is alone. Not lonely. Again I just keep getting more Jimin and how they must have had some conversation about life and cycles and what's next. Everything I said about Jimin and those things that he's reflecting on I just feel somehow it's tied to tae. And when I did the longer reading for Jimin, when I was talking about a friend from the past, I almost wanted to tie it to tae but it didn't make sense so I just deleted it and then I ignored it. But I wonder if some of that actually is connected to tae. If you end up reading that longer reading, it's about somebody from jimin's past coming back. I optimistically said it was about closure for both of them but given any situation it could just be somebody who feels unsettled about something that happened between themselves and Jimin. And has come back. I'm not saying if that encounter that I was reading about is either positive and harmless or like a little bit negative and concerning. I didn't look into that. I just knew that the person who felt left behind in that scenario was holding on to some negativity about being abandoned. 

So this could be somebody they both know. And there could be things going on with this person showing up again already maybe. I thought maybe they would show up in the future but it's possible that this person has already showed up. It's a person that these two know. It's just the possibility. As for whether these are the secrets being exchanged between the two. I don't know. I was feeling more like it was more about conversations regarding life. But this would also make sense for the hey did you hear about this. Maybe they had a conversation that was like hey do you remember this person from back XYZ. I heard from them and it's a little weird. I don't know. Or they're talking about rumors not sure. That would probably be a waste of their time though. But I definitely feel an exchange of some type of secret information. Only between them. Or a small group. I don't feel like it's serious or anything but I just don't really know there. 

That might go back to the serenity and conversations about you know there's nothing you can do about it. 

However looking at serenity again it says you know make peace with your situation unless you can and want to make a change for a better outcome. This reminds me of the idea of a two of wands… and you can choose a path where you don't do anything and maybe nothing happens or you can expect it to go away. Or you can take action. It says a better outcome. It does go back to reminding me of if you had an issue with somebody in the past and you can choose to ignore them or ignore it. Or if they're doing something weird with you you can actually take action and confront them and do something about it. I'm not saying that's what's happening here I'm just offering something. In the art for the serenity card it looks like a witch but she's actually a mermaid and she's sitting on the cliff with a cat familiar. When we think of this position and a mermaid usually it's somebody maybe considering well I guess in case of the Little mermaid it would be pondering if she wants to give up her tail to join the human world. So this could be about an unfulfilled wish or desire. It could be that this desire is already here and now you have a choice to make. 

The art is a little lonely or is giving me that vibe. I get the idea of again back to this conversation they're having… talking about feeling alone. And it's like I want to be able to feel like I am a part of that world lol. It's weird we're talking about this and I literally was talking about aliens. So definitely this is probably on to something. But we have somebody contemplating how they want to be part of something, but they feel kind of alienated from that even when surrounded by people or even somebody who is very good at drawing people to them. Or seeming like they are perfectly extroverted or sociable. But it's kind of like an act. I don't want to say that I think he's fake. It's coming across like somebody who's trying to find that feeling of belonging. But just can't seem to make it click. My guess is there are probably few people that tae feels absolutely himself around and I do think one of them is Jimin. 

As for his other friends that's a possibility too. I don't know enough about them to dig deep into what I'm seeing. But even in this picture we have one lonely person talking to a cat. So the cat could be one particular person like Jimin or the cat isn't anybody. Like it could be you know a dog. As in this person is feeling alone and doesn't have anybody in particular they're speaking too. I get that from the art like this is someone who is just alone and the cat isn't necessarily anybody that we know of. I also think maybe there is some acceptance and peace. Not just about being in the military. Now I'm sitting this more as someone who is accepted a feeling inside of themselves. Maybe he has accepted that he's always going to feel this way at times. Like he's always going to feel a little bit lonely or sad in any situation. I think he contemplates it more than we probably realize. I guess I want to say he might not come off seriously in content. At least that's even my perception of him. But I'm seeing somebody who does a lot of deep thinking about life. And then he has these conversations with someone like Jimin. I'm sure there are plenty of other members he converses with. But I'm just seeing Jimin at the moment. 

Let me look at the tarot cards again I have to scroll all the way to the top to see if there's any imagery I want to focus in on… I just see more of someone who is told certain information and then is left contemplating about things. And the information is shared or gathered or received among multiple people and then one person is left alone thinking. I see that with the high priestess card as well. Somebody who seems to be holding on to something. And then a death card that also signifies things that are hidden or secret and being resolute. I think he is probably a lot of people go to him to tell secrets to him because they know he won't ever say anything. So I think he knows a lot of things about a lot of people. From being directly told or other people go to him to tell him about things. I don't think he particularly gossips himself. At least not anymore unless it's still like someone like Jimin lol. As for digging into whether it has any relations to a romantic situation. I don't see anything. I remember reading for him previously and feeling strongly that there was someone. There is feminine energy around here but I really think that's about receiving things. Receiving information and being open to new experiences. Almost in an experimental way. The only relationship I see clearly has to do with Jimin. And I'm not saying that's romantic lol. I'm just saying they are closer than you will probably ever know when we already think that they're close. 

But even then there is something about tae that feels like devastatingly alone in this universe. I think some people just feel that way. If they're an old soul or they haven't found that perfect match outside of like maybe a platonic soul mate. Which is great too but like not that one single person that you would expect to be a romantic match. That might just like make you feel like oh I'm not alone. I think that sounding a lot bleaker than it is but I do I just get the sense of feeling like an alien. All the time. Everywhere. And then brief times of closeness with people close to him. He might have also come across some life wisdom. To me it feels more self-developed and not somebody came and told him some advice on how to live life. I mean I guess that's possible given that somebody in the cards looks like they're talking about information amongst each other and then somebody's contemplating right. but overall it still feels like it's self-made wisdom. But yeah it almost feels like somebody came and told him something and then you had to go have a think about it. 

Granted it could be vice versa and it's like contemplating about something and then going to talk to friends about it. But it's a secret lol. It's a secret in the sense that sure maybe it's not meant for us. If it wasn't meant for me to read it wouldn't show up in the cards. So I'm saying the information is meant to stay only among the couple of people that he's speaking to about it. It could be that he's actually depressed. I'm not seeing tons of that. But it could be like you know I'm a little sad. I'm a little lonely sometimes even when I'm around people. This could be a theme that he's felt throughout his life. It is a little sad. It actually reminds me of the little Prince. I know we associate that with Jimin. But I am getting somebody who's dressed up like the little Prince and sitting on the planet and maybe he has the little rose to talk to. But even when he's talking to the Rose it's like the rose doesn't really get it. Like the rose just can't human. So it's still really lonely. 

I mean beyond that it seems like he's okay. Given times. Well you could say something like oh between cancer season and Scorpio season perhaps this information or this feeling of being alone could be happening then. I'm more inclined to read something related to the moon in Scorpio. That definitely would be a time about feeling things deeply or being deeply introspective. It could be about a timing thing. I'm not sure when the next moon in Scorpio is. I'm not sure what his moon is. But there's a lot of deep reflecting and receiving information. This information could be coming from people or it could be coming like from the universe. In terms of like sudden thoughts and moods coming to him to contemplate about life and cycles and stages of life. But there's definitely secrets in hidden things involved. That might be the barrier for me not to see exactly what is being talked about and that's fine. Oh lol apparently the moon is in Scorpio right now. That's weird. So again this is a conversation that probably recently happened or just happened is happening now. Again they were together recently so that's probably a good time to have a longer deeper conversation. 

I mean it would also just reflect that I'm doing the reading right now lol. So this is about current energy. 

What else can I say. Both cards are about water energy. There's the moon and there's Pluto. I mean both bodies here represent cycles and phases. Things that are hidden, emotions. So definitely a lot of strong emotions that are either buried underneath or hopefully something that he talked about recently to somebody. I do feel that that has to be the case given what the one card looks like. But that card is also a lot about phases. It just seems interesting that he and Jimin both have similar things on their mind at the moment. Which maybe they always exist on each other's wavelengths somehow. Just like how women sometimes cycle up on their periods who knows. So yeah I think you know if they could talk and have a live in the next few weeks they would say something like oh when we met up for the reunion Tae and Jimin had a long conversation about life and changes. 

Again secret feelings or sharing secrets with one another. But I think a lot of that is also about the things that he hides. From a lot of people. And maybe it's simply about how lonely he feels. I don't know what to do about that. I kind of feel for him. I don't think he gets depressed when he is away from the people he can talk to. I think he just endures. You know how some people feel lonely and they just feel so sorry for themselves or they think they just can't find a match. But he just…can't seem to find people to relate to and doesn't try to fake it. And I'm saying this isn't always surface stuff this is something he probably hides but it's not like he's not aware. He just hides it and this is a lot how he feels on the inside. 

I felt a bit focused on the flag on the death card but I don't really know what that means. Plus I can't see it very well in the photo because I'm pretty blind. 

So I think that pretty much covers everything I see for right now. It could change in a month you know. So let's move on 

Jungkook 

10 of cups and abundance. I mean what can you say. On the surface that certainly looks like emotional happiness and abundance of love. Being around family. This could be at this particular moment when I did the cards which was around the reunion they could have been celebrating and having a great time. And he could have just been vibing. Not that there's anything wrong with being happy lol. There are times when I have read his cards in the last 6 months and it looked like he was having a good time. Ironically it was around the time when there was like a military game that they were doing. And I got the sense that he was enjoying himself during that? Or at least that time. I don't know if he participated in the games but there was like cards I had that involved fun or playtime and being in the mountains and it just felt fine. So let me look up that Oracle card for abundance. He's just happy or he's something else. Like there's not a lot of thought happening there. That didn't sound right lol. So again 10 of cups, this is as good as you can get. If it were a relationship it would be super happy and ecstatic. It can also be a card about family. Blood or otherwise. I mean if I wasn't trying to look too deeply I'd be like yep looks happy. Looks like he has an abundance of happiness. Why question? 

So looking at the abundance card you have a witch and two cats. It almost looks like one cat has its nipples pierced lol. That's just kind of funny. The witch is holding a basket of again I can't see anything but maybe it's like a basket of the moon and stars. If that's not it then it's just apples but that would make sense since they're growing on the trees. I don't know. So we have a sense of stars and moons. There's another phase connection here. Stars usually represent wishes or goals. There seems to be two other cats. So again maybe there was a conversation among the three youngest of BTS recently. I am not sure on that so it's just interesting there are three and I keep getting this idea of phases. So it says abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into. The key words are harvest, grateful, overflowing. The intention says count your blessings, goodness prevails. Your life is full and you have all you need. 

I didn't do this for the others but I'm going to go ahead and read the whole page for this. Delve deeply into your life…past, present, and future. Take into account even the smallest gifts that have been bestowed on you. As humans, we sometimes forget that the simplest blessings are often the most important and meaningful. We think we will always have them. Life is fragile and can change in one second. Begin this very moment showing the universe appreciation. The sun has risen another day. Again the sun being mentioned here. Continuing on it's warm rays offer you comfort as they wrap around you. The moon hovers above, glowing in the night sky. Her dim light casts dancing shadows allowing you to dream. That sounds like stars and goals and stuff. These are just two examples of miracles in themselves. Simply say thank you to the universe.

We can talk about the tarot. We have Jake and Lady rainicorn. This certainly would indicate potentially romantic love. I mean they are husband and wife so it could also be a familial love. It could be that he was literally meeting up with family as well. This could be BTS or literal family and just having a good time. There's the potential that there was also a romantic meetup of some kind or an abundance of a romantic type of love happening. The rainbow kind of makes me lean toward love actually. It could mean other things lol like celebrating pride month. A rainbow has seven colors. So I think maybe it was just a real appreciation for that moment that he got to spend with BTS. 

I don't think there's much to read into his cards. Like I'd love to read in and maybe it had some insight into the military life. I don't think from his letter that he's having a super amazing blast all the time. So I think in this one moment that I shuffled his cards, he was having a good time. It could also be the universe's way of saying you know you don't really have anything to complain about. That you have everything you need, that you have a lot right now. That might be something he realizes that he doesn't want for anything. I just see the card saying this is somebody with a lot to be thankful for. Especially when it comes to people who care about him. I wonder if he got spoiled a little bit during this reunion. Let me just like since I actually have the Oracle cards around shuffle one more. And just get an extra vibe check for him not like I'm trying to be like okay it's suspicious that he's this happy and fulfilled. If I were in the military would I feel that way? But it doesn't matter because it's about in the moment what was he feeling when I shuffled the cards. So I got three cards. 

We have unity so again I'm kind of sensing a reunion there. We have nurture which has a picture of somebody by the fire with all of these little pet companions. And we have soulful that has an owl that looks like a baby owl on the branches and then there's a little be above it or wasp not sure. The owl makes me think of him. Lol it has these big eyes and it looks like a baby owl. I don't know what the b or wasp represents. This owl is so cute lol. It really does look just like him. I kind of feel like this baby owl is maybe watching the witches in this unity circle. It's 8 which is joined hands in a circle under the moon. And then you have this lovely cozy image of the witch reading a book around the fireplace. So yeah it feels like a family or cozy together and the little owl is kind of taking it in with wonder and appreciating it. And I think that makes sense for the tarot cards right. Around all these people and having a good time and feeling comforted and loved and cared for. So whatever was happening in that moment for him it was a very good feeling. I should probably take a picture so you can see how f****** cute this owl is

So I don't know where he was. But it looks like there was a party, there was this feeling that reminds me of in bon voyage 4. When they played the card games and they were listening to their old music and started dancing around. Like when they listened to their old songs and then JK heard his part with his young self rapping and then he like danced around out of embarrassment and it was so cute…. Yeah so probably not in the military at this moment. Probably just taking it in. Trying to ingrain the image of whatever happened into his mind so that when he's alone he can remember it. I'm still really curious about this little wasp/beathing. A hornet? Maybe I should look up what that means as a spirit animal. Well a hornet is about tenacity and determination. That doesn't really fit the image so maybe it's just a bee. And it's about honey and something sweet. It could be about being stung about something. It could be that he was buzzed at the moment lol. It could represent somebody on his mind in particular. Now I have to look it up to see what the hell this card says about the bee. Okay creepy I turned right to the page. It says happiness resides not in possessions, and not in gold, happiness dwells in the soul. That's interesting since he had the ten of cups. 

It says feeling, depth, journey is the keywords. The intention is let your magical light glow around you. Soft stardust will dance like fireflies and the wondrous Twilight sky. Interesting again because that's what looks like is happening in the unity card. So maybe they got together and they were singing and dancing. Movie there was a fireplace or they were in somebody's house or had rented a house that was very cozy and maybe even near the woods. It just feels like a really cozy and nice atmosphere. And it was like kind of like balm to the soul maybe. Like a honey. I want to also read this card for you. 

Since I obviously feel most drawn to this card. Your soul is the spiritual part of your being. Look closely into the mirror of your innermost existence and you will find your deepest, Ross, most authentic thoughts and feelings. Each memory and experience that is part of your soul is safely tucked away inside of you. Light the sparks in your soul. Be carefree. Let your colors dance wildly around you. This kind of looks like the ten of cups card by the way. As in like dancing around and being carefree. Let your colors dance wildly around you. Dig deep and your garden will flourish and bloom and Leslie. Your own sole journey is very personal. Protect your internal soulful powers. You are the keeper of them. Remember, you are a wondrous soulful being who knows you best of all

And almost immediately the one song started playing in my head. Like who are you You're not the girl I fell in love with. Anyway yeah. 

I'm just so curious about this stupid little bee it didn't get explained in the car did it. Let me pull one more card and be like okay what is the deal with this b. 

Ironically I got the card balance. Isn't that crazy how you're like what's the deal with this b which voice to text refuses to say b e e. So we're definitely going to rebalance. It's just a card with trees at the bottom and then the moon and there's like this branch coming in that looks like it's covering the moon. So let's look at balance real quick especially since we have a confirmed b.

Of course be is also an album. So I think we are again confirming that maybe when BTS got together they were singing some of their old songs. Or even watching old videos where they sing or whatever. 

Okay so keywords for balance, then, being, namaste. The intention says find your happy medium, take care of your mind, body and spirit. Find yours in explore your being strive to create balance. The other part says self-care is, fundamentally, about bringing balance back to a life that has grown imbalance from too many commitments or responsibilities. Well that's interesting right. So I think he must have had this moment during the reunion probably where he spent time with the group and it was a very healing moment. They probably danced and shared stories and had a good old time and it made him feel like he was having fun and it was a really nice cozy warm feeling for him. That's it. I don't think there's more to read in that moment other than we have put to catch a glimpse of him having really nice time with the group of people. And it made him feel in balance after moments of probably not feeling quite like himself or feeling out of balance. And I still don't fully know what to bee was about besides leading us to another card. I guess it also looks like a shrimp lol. Maybe he was just really hungry for shrimp at but the time.

I don't really see anything else for him. You can't argue with abundance in 10 of cups. 

It's not much to go on but in terms of dates, the 10th could be a significant date for JK. That doesn't really narrow it down. Or the month of October can be significant for him as well. We just have in terms of numbers 1 or 10 to go on. So something about the self or something about completion or something about a cycle. That's sort of vague so I would just assume that we're close to the end of a cycle. Is it time for a full moon? Did we just have one. I don't remember but usually you start saying tens around the time that it would be a full moon. But again 10 of cups emotional abundance, literal abundance Oracle card. Yeah. Pretty good cards to get. Maybe he'll receive something in October in terms of abundance. Like whether it's emotional abundance or like a ten of pentacles abundance. 

Or something about the number 10 it will be significant in terms of abundance. I don't know but like for example putting out a song or album called 10 or getting 10 on the billboard or releasing something on the 10th or releasing something in October.. if it were a song, it would be a dance track I think. Like electronic dance music or trap music Wait is that the right thing I want to say. So maybe after jm releases music in July you might see more music from JK in October. That's just a guess. I guess besides having some electronic music happening, there could be like soulful music or slower music. Something that would be comforting and quiet. Maybe you'll see like a b or a hornet or something on the jacket cover I don't know. Or maybe the album title will start with b. Or song that starts with b. Or he's wearing a yellow jacket lol. Or it's about the 10th track on an album. Which would be surprising since none of them seem to have more than a handful of tracks. Or maybe if you go back and look at Golden whatever the 10th track was.

In case you're wondering, it's shot glass of tears so maybe that's relevant. Maybe that's a mood. There you go!

Okay wait I went to look at the song lyrics. And besides mentioning the Sun, I was drawn to the 42 and body because first of all I was like what the hell does that mean. I didn't listen to Golden a lot. I love standing next to you but the rest of the songs I couldn't really relate to I'll say. Though I think I remember shot glass full of tears and it was fine. So I found this I don't know if that song was written by somebody British or not 

I love interesting since we were actually talking about 10. But supposedly yeah okay someone on Twitter was like oh it's about hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy. I'm reading more like this is probably what it meant but like slang that most of us don't know. I'm American. I have never heard anybody say this. And I don't watch Love Island. 

So it's saying that yeah whatever her body is perfect or something. A 10. But also I think it's still stands about the number 42, which the other side of it is yes related to hitchhikers. And then there's this thing about how 42 is the ultimate answer to whatever ultimate question but nobody knows what the actual question is. This has been like a running thing through a lot of entertainment stuff. If you ever watched the old show X-Files. Mulders apartment number was 42 based on this. Point being that yes it does represent the mysteries of the universe. So I think it's a mix of all of that. You're probably like WTF but I mean related to his cars there's something about an ideal or something feeling or saving perfect in this moment. There's also a sense of maybe serendipity. Something coming together. Something the universe has put together serendipitously that feels perfect, that feels like a 10. 

[citrinekay]

Hey! I’ve been meaning to reach out and say hi for a while! Finally, I got a re-blog from you, tysm!! I’ve seen quite a few of your JCW posts (and also your stuff on various fandoms on AO3) and I know you’re quite the JCW fan – me too! Actually, I wanted to message to let you know that I think what you’re doing with the Andy/Revolver fanfic you’re writing is amazing. I read the first chapter a few days ago and am interested to see what you do with the story. The way you are dealing with some very sensitive topics is so well written, and I love the thought you have put into Andy’s character to give him this dark backstory. I’m looking forward to reading the rest when it’s completed, I never do well with chapter by chapter!! Also, well done for being the first to post for the Revolver fandom, I remember a short time back having to do that for the Pachinko fandom and I was nervous as hell. You are a very talented writer for sure, so I know the Revolver one will be a good read. Hopefully you’ll be inspired with Gangnam B-Side too once we see more. Anyway, sorry for waffling on, but if you ever wanna enthuse about JCW feel free to message ❤️ ~ take care 

Hi!! I've also seen your name popping up on AO3 too whenever I go to publish something JCW-related, like oh there's that one other person who loves him as much as I do😊lol I watched Worst of Evil last October and just fell completely in love him/ haven't been able to get back out of the obsession spiral since then thanks to pretty much every work he's done being worth watching. I don't expect the fixation to end any time soon haha

I'm genuinely so happy to receive feedback on my Revolver fic! Before I started posting, I made peace with the fact that it wasn't going to get much engagement since I had to create the fandom tag myself, but of course I do want some people to read and enjoy it. I was also fairly nervous about approaching those sensitive topics, so it's a relief to know that the way I'm presenting it doesn't feel offensive or tactless. It's always my intention to show the dark sides of human nature and relationships in a compelling but empathetic way. I couldn't stop thinking about the crumbs they gave us about Andy and Grace's relationship after I finished watching the movie, especially that final scene on the mountain when he begs her not to leave him and Madam Jung's comment to Suyeong that there's "rumors that he's her lover." She doesn't even allow people to know he's really her mom, which in and of itself could be pretty damaging to someone's development, but it seemed to me that the toxicity between them goes further than just this secret. They were clearly manipulating each other in that moment when she starts to walk away and then he cries and begs her not to leave. I thought that it seemed as if they had been through this type of push-and-pull before, a vicious cycle from which there is no escaping, and I really wanted to examine what had led up to that point.

It also really struck me that even though Andy is a privileged, wealthy person, he is drinking alone when Suyeong first meets him. Nobody rushes to his rescue when she's beating him and nobody really cares that he got hurt afterward (not even Grace, she's just mildly annoyed!) While it's true that his behavior invites getting his ass kicked, I think that anyone acting with such conscious disregard of their own life and everyone else's might have serious trauma that has never been addressed. Anyway, I totally understand waiting to read the fic until it's complete and I hope you enjoy the rest once it's done. I'll be updating weekly, so it shouldn't be too much longer.

Also, absolutely yes about Gangnam B-Side. I watched the first 2 episodes on Wednesday evening and my brain is already tickling with many thoughts about Gilho. As always, JCW is delivering a performance full of depth and nuance 🖤 I'll wait until the show has finished airing and I have all the character details to start writing but atm I can almost guarantee there will be some fics coming from me!

[saint-starflicker]

Happy Early Halloween, Chat!

By chat I mean @leiflitter (I know you're in output mode! You go, Leif's output mode; just courtesy-tagging 😁) @nbymop @rwoh @spacecasehobbit—and @wolfiso who might still be seeking out ghost stories.

I mentioned wanting to start a book club on the Fable app, and while I'm still discovering some stumbling blocks (app is sensitive to dropped connections so I often have to re-type and post twice after refreshing; the Book Quotes feature doesn't go beyond maybe 350 keystrokes; I never loved star ratings but the emoji rating is too limited and ambiguous too; only 10 tags allowed across so many different rubrics; filling out the Book Review form feels like being a research subject of a target demographic focus group, the Book Club thread-post format I think is less conducive to broader discussions about the books such as racism and disability representation and/or queer readings across a variety of works in the gothic novel "canon"...and then encouraging one another with writing, which was half my motivation for starting up a reading club in the first place, but there's not much wiggle room for customization...)

uh

maybe Fable's list function is better. Yeah. I'm gonna go with sharing my lists.

...I hope it doesn't force link-clickers to make an account before you get to see these lists, because what's the point of the list settings being Public if it's not going to be public Public?

And I don't put this up to imply that anyone reading must read all of them. This is more like, the book club could've been a wine cellar—so I appreciate recommendations because what I do have is still aggressively Anglo.

[screenshot of tweet by @MumblinDeafRo that says: "I said this before, but I try not to think of it as a TBR pile but more like a wine cellar. You try & time the right combination of mood, energy & interest, so that you pick a book when you have the best chance of getting along with it. That's what the writer prefers too." ]

Amontillado under Keep Reading cut.

Early Gothic — The Castle of Otranto (more inspired by medieval chivalric romances and I think the author even tried to pass it off as one; but in all my research everyone says this was the first gothic novel), The Castles of Athlin and Dunbayne (I think was still low-key riding Otranto's coattails in addition to taking inspiration from it, not that that's a bad thing), The Castle of Wolfenbach (now we're getting somewhere), The Mysteries of Udolpho (oh Anne Radcliffe we're really in it now, and by it I mean a literary genre that was new in like 1790 CE), Glenarvon (the earliest instance of a "Byronic" character I could find that wasn't literally Lord George Gordon Byron's self-insert), The Monk (of all the gothic novels that stirred up controversy, this one was the most stirred up controversiest), Northanger Abbey (oh Jane Austen we're really in it now), Fantasmagoriana: Geschichten der Toten (translated from German to French by Jean-Baptiste Benoît Eyriès, not really on this list to read but rather to say oh George Gordon Byron we're really in it now), The Vampyre (the second instance of a "Byronic" character that I've heard about) and Frankenstein.

I elected to leave out a lot that was on Jane Austen's characters' reading lists in Northanger Abbey (Necromancer of the Black Forest, Carl Grosse's Horrid Mysteries, The Italian, The Mysterious Warning, Clermont, The Midnight Bell, and Orphan of the Rhine) because Northanger Abbey was already there, and to include some nonfiction such as Richard Hurd's "Letters on Chivalry and Romance" that was Hurd's observations on that genre's development, as well as Idée sur les Romans by Worst Human Being of the Century award-winner Marquis Donatien Alphonse François de Sade.

Midcentury and Victorian/Edwardian era Gothic — I didn't actually know whether to put The Last Man by Mary Shelley in the Early Gothic list or if 1826 can count as "midcentury". As it stands, this list begins with A Priest in 1839 by Jules Verne (written in the mid/late 1840s but not published until...1992? and unfinished), Notre-Dame de Paris by Victor Hugo, assorted novels by the Brontë sisters, The Marble Faun by Nathaniel Hawthorne, Carmilla, Dracula, Clemence Housman's Werewolf, Frances Hodgson Burnett's sort of cozy gothic kid lit, The Phantom of the Opera and The Picture of Dorian Gray.

I really wanted to add Moby Dick and Karl Heinrich Ulrichs's Manor to this list but I think "nautical gothic" could practically be its own thing.

[toluene-sister]

Hi :),

how would you describe the Joker and Bruce in your stories? I know they are both based on Ledger's and Bale's portrayal but you added some new quirks. Also how did you come up with these? Do you have tips for new writers?

Hey there! This is gonna be a long one, because I have no idea how to answer this in a succinct manner, so please bear with me here ><

Let's start with Joker--the way I see him, he is extremely organized and likes to be ready for just about anything, to the point of being ridiculous about it. He's always trying to think several steps ahead, even in the most mundane situations. That's not something you develop overnight, it's a trait that could stem from having very little sense of security in your early life and feeling you can only ever depend on yourself. In the original script, he says to Bruce "Can't rely on anyone these days. Have to do everything yourself. I always have- and it's not always easy…" which didn't make it into the final version of the scene, but I think it's such a telling line!

There's also another line that didn't make it into the final cut that I like very much. When J calls Engel to say he wants Reese dead, he was originally written to be impersonating an old lady, only to reveal himself at the end of the call. This is the fragment of the original script:

ENGEL Who is this? OLD LADY Just a concerned citizen- (drops pitch to the JOKER'S VOICE) -and regular guy…

It's another little tidbit that shows he was probably just some guy who was severely let down by the system, hence why he's targeting all of the organized structures of the city, not differentiating between the mob or the law--it's all establishment in his mind. It might also be the reason why he likes to hide in plain sight, considering himself just a regular citizen.

I think he's also extremely empathetic, which allows him to read people and play them like a fiddle (as being empathetic does not equal being sympathetic lmao). Like, I headcanon him to have some sort of Anna Breytenbach level of superhuman empathy that allowed him to get fucking attack dogs to follow his command within hours of stealing them from the Chechen lol--this is normally something that requires a lot of training and trust-building, definitely not something you achieve in a few hours (if you don't know who Breytenbach is, I highly recommend googling her, very interesting stuff). I also HC him to be very sensitive, to the point of being easily and painfully overstimulated. I really, truly believe the entirety of all the shit he pulled in TDK was just a big stimming session for him XD

Now let's do Bruce. He's the kind of guy who dropped everything and fucked off to some third-world country as a stowaway to train and gain some insights, and he kept at it for seven years. That's a really, really long time. And the level to which he committed to it all, surviving in a foreign country with zero resources, becoming a gang leader, going to prison, then training with the League of Shadows--all of it demanded tremendous mental fortitude. It's one of the reasons why I like the Nolanverse Bruce so much--he's not emotionally constipated, I mean he is dark and obviously very haunted, but he's not blocking anything, he knows himself extremely well, I mean he has to in order to pull off everything he does in the movies. He knows exactly who he is and what he's capable of, which means, psychologically speaking, he must have spent a lot of time integrating his shadow with great success (which is mainly what I believe his training with the LoS and facing his fears was all about). That's why when he's experiencing severe trauma and loss (Rachel's death), he is able to sort of skip all the stages of grief, go straight to acceptance and keep going, in spite of all the pain and doubt.

With that in mind, I would put self-knowledge as Bruce's main character trait. It's how he came to terms with his feelings for Joker and accepted them, even though it wasn't an easy process for obvious reasons. It caused him severe mental anguish and gave him insomnia, but he didn't flinch away from those feelings at any point.

I also think he's got insane survivor's guilt, which is the aftermath of his parents' death and drives him to sacrifice himself and carry the weight of the world's sins on his shoulders (taking the fall for Dent is one example). It's part of the reason why he can't seem to put any blame on Joker for the crimes he's committed, instead he just blames himself for not stopping him.

And lastly, there's the traumatized child at the very core of his being, and I believe there is absolutely nothing he could ever do to truly heal that part of his psyche, he can only try and comfort it. That's why he enjoys acting submissive towards Joker--deep down, he just wants to be taken care of.

As far as writing tips go, I'm not sure if I'm the right person to ask, as I don't really consider myself much of a writer--LISMBWYD and Dissolve & Absolve are the only things I have ever written in my entire life. I suppose the main piece of advice I can give is to simply try to know what you're writing about, and I don't mean doing research--just keep asking yourself, what is this scene really about, what am I trying to convey here, does this serve any purpose, what would a living, breathing person with this set of characteristics actually feel or do in this situation? I think if you stop and think about what you really, really want to write and then spend some time visualizing how the scene would go down in the real world, then the writing itself will come fairly easily. And most importantly, have fun with it! Your writing will be all the better for it if you simply enjoy the process <3

Again, apologies for the length of this but I could write entire essays about these two lol, so it goes without saying that if you'd like me to elaborate on any of the above, please feel free to message me~!

[onbearfeet]

As requested, here are a few Monster Mash asks based on the "oc asks: not-so-nice edition" list. You decide which characters they're for.

What is a surprising thing your character hides?

What does your character do when they should be sleeping but can't?

What's the worst wound your character has experienced? It can be physical or emotional.

Mwahahahahahaaaaaaa. I think I'll do multiple characters. WARNING: There's mature content in this one, and it's not just canon-typical violence. See the tags if you're worried.

What is a surprising thing your character hides?

Ted has a really beautiful singing voice, even in Man-Thing form. He no longer has the physical equipment to form words in any human language, though, so he's sensitive about it and doesn't let on that he still enjoys singing. But he's sung more than a few lullabies to Jack when he's been asleep or in a coma or whatever. And Alpine gets funny little children's melodies or goofy love songs when it's just the two of them. She accepts this as no less than the worship she deserves, of course.

Elsa is shockingly generous and tells no one but her accountant about it. She inherited an absolutely stupid amount of money from her father's estate, and she IMMEDIATELY stopped using his fortune to fund his "crusade", so she's essentially sitting on a dragon's hoard. She took almost nothing with her when she ran away, so she's lived poor for most of her adult life and is deeply sympathetic to other people in that situation, not that she'll admit it. She had her finance pro shut down the murder-cult fund and set up a clean new fund to support whatever charity she damn well pleases. She's still trying to think of ideas and will probably ask the boys eventually, but just for a start, every public library in the state got a healthy donation, and every shelter she stayed in that treated its inhabitants halfway decently got a bigger one. She's also looking into funding--founding, if she has to--an organization defending the rights and interests of homeschooled children, especially those in high-control environments. Elsa was homeschooled for much of her education according to Ulysses' rather eccentric tastes, and she had to teach herself an awful lot of actual education out of the library. And that's before all the trouble she had as a non-emancipated minor who didn't have her own copies of her identity documents.

God, what DOESN'T Jack hide? He's been alive long enough that there's a huge gray zone of stuff he might have failed to mention because he doesn't want people to know OR because it just never came up. He obviously hasn't discussed his family of origin in detail, at least not with Elsa or Bucky, but I don't consider that surprising. I'm tempted to say his hidden side is something sweet and wholesome, but that's not surprising either. If I said he was hiding something terrible he or the wolf had done, that probably wouldn't surprise most people at all. If I had to guess ... the only SURPRISING thing I can think of is his spirituality, which is complex and deeply personal to him. His family might have been Orthodox, but he's got a lot of Catholic guilt written all over him, and the curse only complicates that more. I don't think he's talked to anyone about what he does or doesn't believe in a hundred years or more. He certainly hasn't talked to me.

Bucky was a sex worker in a time-displaced brothel. Okay, that's both a joke AND an oversimplification, but the first thing I thought of when I saw this question was that Bucky had the same problem as Jack: old, complicated, obviously full of both good traits and horrible trauma so nothing is SURPRISING. Then I remembered that around 2016, I handwrote a story establishing that Bucky had worked for a while as an artist at Lady Sally's. If you've never read Spider Robinson's Callahan books, they're a series of short SF stories and novels centered on a bar run by (spoiler alert) a time traveler who's trying to save the world retroactively by preventing the Cold War from going hot. They are brilliant and hilarious and they formed me as a person. There is also a spin-off series focusing on Callahan's wife, Lady Sally McGee, who does the same thing but with a brothel. The reasoning is complex, but the stories are delightful and some of the first positive, sympathetic, relatively clear-eyed depictions of sex workers (or artists, as they're called here and who am I to disagree?) I ever encountered. So it is my headcanon that young Bucky Barnes started washing dishes at Lady Sally's as a teenager, and she kept an eye on the kid because he had a lot of history ahead of him. He worked as an artist for at least a year before the war, not least because it was the only job in the late 30s that paid well enough to let him afford Steve's medicines. (Sally was keeping an eye on Buck's "roommate", too.) Bucky never told Steve, but he was actually quite a talented and popular artist, and he liked working there. He gave notice when he and Steve finally admitted their feelings for each other, wanting to be monogamous with the man he loved, but Sally insisted he come to her if he or Steve ever needed anything in the future, and she slipped him money from time to time via his former coworkers--who, as far as Steve knew, were just girls Bucky dated to keep up appearances. The connection came in handy, too, when the Winter Soldier was sent to kill a man at Lady Sally's and the staff were able to send him away again thanks to his half-remembered connection to the place. Lady Sally's is closed in our time, but you never know when Bucky might get a phone call from the Lady.

What does your character do when they should be sleeping but can't? I'll leave Ted out of this one on the grounds that his biology is different enough that "should be sleeping" may not apply.

So, on a sleepless night at Bloodstone Manor? Jack bakes. He's got access to a well-stocked kitchen now, anything he makes WILL get eaten, and baking is less likely to wake anyone else than playing his guitar or running endless zoomie laps. He also feels a little better when he can do something kind (and profoundly human) out of his emotional turmoil. Helping people helps Jack, and if there are no monsters to rescue or curses to break, he can at least make sure his people have something delicious for breakfast. (Or a midnight snack. Let's face it, somebody else will wake up from a nightmare in an hour.)

Elsa is currently the queen of maladaptive coping mechanisms. She's cut down on drinking since the boys moved in, much to everyone's relief, but she's still in rough shape emotionally. Although she sleeps better than the others thanks to her sleep-anywhere hunter training, she does occasionally have nights when her brain won't shut up, and her solution to that is to run herself into the ground. She'll hit the dojo for as many hours as it takes, usually. Bucky is trying to coax her into something less destructive in his unique sergeant-y way. The sentence "Your magic rock is not an excuse to bust your knuckles again, so wear some damn gloves!" has been uttered.

Bucky is actually the best adjusted on this front, mostly because his sleep disturbances are the worst. (Jack has more traumatic memories overall. Bucky’s are more concentrated, and he's had to heal brain damage on top of it.) Thanks to his time in Wakanda, he's learned some basic meditation techniques and some therapy exercises to help himself calm down a little. Alpine has some kind of extra sense for when Bucky is in distress, so on the rare occasion she's not already in bed with him when he wakes up screaming, she'll come running in immediately. He usually ends up either curled around her, doing breathing exercises, or settling down in bed with a book while she purrs on his chest until the tension finally melts out of him. Bucky isn't healed by any stretch of the imagination, but by God he's trying.

What's the worst wound your character has experienced? It can be physical or emotional.

Ted Sallis died of his injuries from a horrific accident, drowning in a swamp while his super-soldier serum burned him from the inside out after the so-called love of his life betrayed him. That's the worst for him. Only Jack knows about it, and even he doesn't know it all. Nothing else comes close.

Jack is pretty good at toughing out physical pain by now, so his worst wounds are definitely emotional. I think the worst one was finding out that his sister, Lissa, had died. It was a natural death, but he didn't find out until years later, and she was his last connection to who he was before the wolf. The wound has never fully healed.

Elsa's worst wound is what she told Bucky about in "Bucky Meets the Legion of Monsters": realizing that the monsters she'd been hunting, even without her father's input, had mostly been people. That's an identity-shattering experience that has fundamentally changed her.

Bucky’s worst physical wound was losing his arm. His worst emotional wound was either when he realized Steve wasn't coming to save him from Hydra a second time or when he realized Steve wasn't coming back from his time jaunt. Bucky is profoundly loyal and loving, and he is constantly disappointed by other people's failure to meet him where he is. Thus, he doesn't trust easily, but Steve has always had Bucky’s entire heart, and Steve's broken it twice now. It wasn't intentional the first time and we don't yet know what happened the second, but like Jack, Bucky is walking around with an unhealed wound in his soul. If Steve ever reappears in Bucky’s life, there will be Consequences. Even if Bucky will always forgive Steve and would take him back without hesitation, the rest of the squad will have serious concerns about a fella who'd abandon Bucky Barnes two whole times.

[elenajohansenreads]

i had new thoughts about the validity of DNF book reviews and i want to share them

Something a friend said reminded me of A Book Review Incident I was involved in a while back, wherein a DNF review I wrote made some people angry both for a) not finishing the work, and b) what I had to say about the part I did read.

I'm not going to dredge up the review itself or name the book, that's not important. But thinking about it again while doing dishes (dish-thoughts is the new shower-thoughts) made me realize there's distinction between types of review and the expectations people have for them, and thus why some people absolutely cannot stand DNF reviews.

How I see it now, the problem is the gap between two styles of book review:

An analysis and examination of the work itself on its own merits;

A review of the experience the reader had reading the book.

For the sake of brevity, let's call these the "scholarly" and "product" reviews.

Back when I was a college student, even when I was not formally tasked with a book "review," I was expected to read the assigned material fully and engage with all of its content, in order to discuss it in class, or use it as a basis for a paper, or whatever else the class required. I could not not finish the reading and present my frustration with it as a valid form of participation for grading purposes. (I tried that once with a particularly difficult book in a particularly annoying class, and to no one's surprise, it did not go well.) This is what I mean by the scholarly review type: DNF reviews are unacceptable.

Product book reviews, on the other hand, are functionally like the review of any other product. I recently bought a handheld vacuum, and I read the reviews of several models before I chose one. I looked to see how many one-star reviews there were, and judged the reasonableness of the complaints. If Vacuum A was prone to weak suction or didn't charge quickly, while Vacuum B had attachments that were hard to fit to the nozzle, I wanted to know these things in order to make my decision. Likewise, if many readers of a certain book I might be interested in didn't like it, I want to know why, and DNF reviews are perfectly valid in this case, because not wanting to finish the book is a true experience the reviewer had, that gives me information about my possible enjoyment of that book.

To be honest, many reviews are some of both. I know I write both kinds, either on their own or combined, depending on the book. Most reviews I read are both types combined as well, generally weighted more towards product than scholarly, but still with aspects of each.

My galaxy-brain moment came when I realized that DNF-review haters want scholarly reviews when they're actually getting product reviews.

No, if I didn't finish the book, I can't credibly talk with someone about the full plot, its themes, the deeper meanings. I don't possess that information. But yes, my experience of not finishing the book is still potentially valuable to someone else who might be saved the trouble of reading it themselves because my review pointed out some poor qualities of the work, or potential unmarked triggers about sensitive subject matter, etc etc.

I don't expect to change anyone's mind with this or significantly alter the state of book review discourse--for the most part, people don't even interact with book reviews much, it's rare for me to get more than a few likes, barely ever a single comment or reply, and The DNF Review Incident only happened that once, quite memorably.

Also, I'd have to be posting reviews, which I'm not, again. I am still reading. I may start writing reviews at some point.

But I had these thoughts, and the way my brain works, they required expressing, and I decided to do it here in case my realization helped someone else understand (possibly) why the haters gonna hate.