#Merlin's mental health

[dollopheadedmerlin]

Personally, I hate when people say that Merlin is king of the druids. Merlin isn't meant to be a king. He's meant to serve. Serve Arthur. Serve magic. Serve the earth beneath his feet and the waters falling from the skies. He gives and sacrifices and fuels the world around him.

King is objectively Arthur's role, and I think making Merlin a ruler of another people kind of dampens that. Merlin would not be king of the druids, he would be on his knees and beg and convince those with magic to follow his king. Even if Merlin is a god, he will always hold Arthur up high upon his shoulders. Worship him in my stead.

[awesomenikie]

Fun fact I’ve never seen the last episode of Merlin. Actually I only made it to season 5 episode 6 and decided to just not put myself through suffering. So I will never fully know what happened in those episodes and I’m okay with that. Arthur Pendragon is still alive and kicking in my world.

[yourfavecharacterisqueer]

[imagine-to-be-a-pike]

Leon knew he had failed. He did not fail as a knight. He failed as a friend. He failed as someone who swore to protect him.

He took a step towards the tent, a mixture of blood and sweat running down his forehead, reminding him of what he had just participated in. What Arthur had just participated in

Arthur. Barely 14 years old. Such an innocent and lovely soul. and now he stood in the middle of the tent and shook. The slightly too big armor (despite trying to adjust it) hung on his barely teenage body. The blood-covered armor. Not just the armor. That bright face, golden hair suddenly faded, flooded with a monstrous red.

He looked at him. He knew that look, he remembered it perfectly. Betrayal. He first saw it in the boy's eyes when his father first ordered the guards to take him to the dungeons. Leon swore then that he would never be the cause of that hurt, betrayed face.

He didn't even dodge the piece of armor thrown at him. If it hurt, he deserved it. How ironic the blond's words from a few hours ago sounded now

,,I can't wait to become a real knight like you"

A real knight should protect people. Not mercilessly murder them. Not what Leon just did. not what Arthur was just forced to see. "What a monster he must think I am now" Leon thought. He had seen Arthur's looks during the execution he was forced to watch and they were nothing compared to the horrified looks of those blue eyes as the horror unfolded around him. He saw the mouth open in a silent scream of terror, maybe both, as he swung his sword at the child.

It's funny how a person you thought was perfect can, in a matter of minutes, turn into the worst monster in your eyes.

He wanted to explain himself, apologize, say anything. He was ready to scream, cry, throw things. But the blond just stood there with shaking hands, rubbing his arms as if he was trying to scratch the blood away along with the skin.

,,why didn't you ever tell me?"

Good question.He knew what happened during raids. It wasn't his first time. But he was afraid. He knew how Arthur idealized him. He knew how much boy needed someone to be a role model, someone to give him some approval. But Leon was also a coward. He didn't want to lose someone he practically saw as a little brother. He didn't want to lose his little sun that shone even after the worst training.

He remembered his panic when Arthur, encouraged, told him he was going on another raid. Panic at the truth. Panic that this sweet soul would face a horror that a child shouldn't be exposed to. His prince was overjoyed but the road to the camp was a slow countdown for Leon.

,,These were innocent people... children... women... and all of you....just"

Arthur's eyes were wet, tears mixing with the dirt on his cheeks.

,, Arthur .."

,,leave me"

There was something new in these blue eyes. Not just hurt and betrayal. Coldness. Coldness that Leon saw in one person. The person Arthur should never be reminded of. And he left. And if only he knew that was the last time he would address his prince by his name.

[von-rosewald]

fun fact: television actually peaked with the release of bbc merlin (2008), with the medium seeing steady decline thereafter, none able to surpass its brilliance

[merlinmyrddin]

It's with great difficulty that I put my pride aside here.

As a transgender man, currently living in the UK, it's hell. The waiting list of the NHS for my region is close to 6 years, my back is fucked due to binding my chest ("don't bind and exercise"... I work hospitality. I don't have a choice), to the point I ended up stuck in bed for 10h in tears due to spasms, unable to get an ambulance cause... the health system is not doing ok. I work in a café/bookshop; the mental exhaustion of having JK Rowling mentioned daily, debating trans rights to validating my existence, my family cutting all ties with me... it's rough mate. But it's life, my life.

I need help. If not to fund my transition going private (as this would average £1500 just to start...!), to at least afford a chiropractor for my back and neck so I can be able to move up to a full-time contract and save money, and for counselling.

Chiropractor is £40 initial cost for the examination, then £35 per treatment, which I'm hoping a course of 3 treatments should put me back on track.

Counselling is £20 a seance via my local volunteering counselling group.

My Pa*Pal

Every little help, even just a reblog would be greatly appreciated.

For people not living in the UK and for more context : many industries are striking right now (as they should. Get a union people!), the NHS is crumbling down, the government is fucked but hey, Harry wrote a book huh. Some people can't afford to put the heating on, people are queuing at the food bank and it's been 3 months that a friend of mine is sleeping on my sofa because the council, housing agents and homelessness emergency helpline are all backed up and virtually useless right now. Two other people I know had to face homelessness within the last month. Everything is ✨️fucked ✨️

I give back to the community the best I can : volunteering at my local LGBTQ+ charity, connecting people by having a coffee/chat monthly event to help reduce the isolation of elderly people, organising exhibitions about the queer history, bookfares... but it's only last week-end, when my back once again was being a pain due to the cold and humidity that I realised that I, myself, also need help, laying there in bed like a grumpy old man being so proud and stubborn it was low-key laughable...

So if you can help, thank you so much. If you can't, thank you for at least reading me ❤️

Fuck the government, fuck politics, strike like there's no tomorrow, fight for your rights, unionise, be loud, be proud, don't be a c*nt and hand in hand, I'll support you, you'll support me, and we'll get there together. Solidarity forever.

[dreamspring]

someone edit a video just of clips of merlin smiling to the song it’s not living if it’s not with you by the 1975 NOW!!!!!

[radioactive-cloud]

tiktok keeps putting merthur edits on my fyp and it's making me emotional

[scientistswishingwell]

This is not a recipe blog. But have some cake and also what I thought about while I made it.

Spiced Apple Bundt Cake(s)

Cake Ingredients:

3 medium apples, chopped

1 c. maple syrup

3 eggs

3/4 c. brown sugar (I used dark)

1/2 c. butter, softened 

1 Tbsp vanilla

3 c. flour

1 1/2 tsp baking powder 

1 1/2 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp fine sea salt

1 Tbsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp ground nutmeg

1/2 tsp ground ginger

1/4 tsp ground allspice 

(Optional) 1 c. chopped walnuts 

Icing Ingredients: (will make more icing than you need so maybe half this unless you want extra) 

1 c. powdered sugar

1/4 c. milk

8 oz cream cheese

2 Tbsp vanilla

pinch of cinnamon and nutmeg as desired 

Instructions:

For the cake, begin by mixing the apples, maple syrup, eggs, sugar, butter, and vanilla. (Bold Ingredients) In a mixer the apple bits may jump out of the mixer so cover it with a towel or duck!

Mix all the other cake ingredients together and add into the apple mixture. 

Grease your Bundt pan really well. Bake a full cake for 1 hour at 350F or mini Bundt cakes for 45 minutes. Overfill the mini Bundt cake pan a bit so that the icing can sit inside the cake. 

For the icing mix all the ingredients together. Ideally, it is a little bit goopy so you can fill the mini Bundt cakes but also get a good drip to make it pretty. 

This cake is also awesome with caramel sauce. 

Hey everyone, now that we have cake, want to know a fun fact? Much like the way that this bundt cake is just okay without the apples and the apples are just apples without the cake, Today we get to have this wonderful combination of apples and cake AND either caramel or cream cheese icing (or both if you’re feeling saucy), and we get to think about lichens. 

What’s a lichen, you may ask? Or you may not ask, because you already know, or because you are not interested, and in that case you can skip this bit and just think about cake. But for those of you still here, a lichen is, in its simplest form, a symbiotic relationship between an algae and a fungus, with the fungus providing structure and protection and the algae providing extra food with the ability to photosynthesize. Lichens grow on rocks and trees and pretty much anywhere else, and are among the very first organisms that colonize a place after a disaster such as a forest fire or a volcanic eruption. Because of this they are often called pioneer organisms, and they are able to persist in environments far harsher than post-volcanic wastelands. In fact, the poster child of natural resilience, the tardigrade, looks like an absolute wimp when compared to some species of lichen, which can withstand several orders of magnitude more radiation than our dear little water bears. Lichen are resistant to many kinds of damage, and there are several species of lichen whose presence can be used as a surrogate to determine the overall air quality in a region. 

But wait, you say, back up. Species of lichen? Didn’t you just say that a lichen is two separate organisms? How can a lichen be a species? Would you list a great white shark and her loyal remora as a single species? Of course not. While they both benefit from their symbiotic partnership, they are also perfectly capable of existing separately. Such is not the case for many species of lichen, which have spent so long living in tandem that the individual fungi and algae can no longer live apart. Thus, a single lichen is classified as a species, and not two individuals. 

This is what is beautiful about the humble lichen. It can look like nothing but a dusting of greenish powder, or it can hang off of trees in curtains. It can be sent to space, frozen, boiled, and irradiated, and will rebound faster than anything else even where disaster has devastated an area. However, take those two individuals apart and they may well falter and fail under the same stressors just like everything else. And just so, everything in the world will struggle on its own without the support of another. Lichen builds the communities we thrive in, and in itself is a tiny community, proving every day, in every corner of the world and beyond, that we are stronger together. 

Thanks for the idea, @vroom-shroom, and thanks for helping me make everything a two person job.

[sirleonthelongsuffering]

only my (bbc) arthur pendragon fans completely understand why wille is behaving like that this season . there's so many layers to it and they are one and the same

[secretlyhuntokar]

watching the comfort shows isnt enough anymore i need to become part of their universes. all of them. all at once.

[paradisemisplaced56]

Never thought I’d be as blown away as I am by ‘Takin over the Asylum’

For a show to be so raw and honest in its depictions of mental illness whilst perpetuating a narrative of kindness and love is rare. Stunning performances, brilliant writing, and a soundtrack rivalling the best coming of age media to date.

This show is a treasure and deserves to be less niche than it is.

[damagedward]

ኗዐዐዕ ቻዐዪ ሃዐሁ

( ᴳᵒᵈ ᴵ ᵂⁱˢʰ ᵀʰᵃᵗ ᴵ ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ᴰᵒ ᵀʰᵃᵗ )

A storyline based solo featuring @merlin-emrys-wyllt

⚠️ 𝖳𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗀𝖾𝗋 𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀 ⚠️

In case I missed any in tags this does involve unfaithfulness , unplanned child and similar themes so do not read on if these things can hurt you - care for you first 💟

She was breaking , this was tearing her apart , to see him with with her , the one he had saved . Suddenly he hadn’t had time for her , only for this new woman in need . Perhaps she wasn’t broken enough anymore for him , perhaps she’d been a phase , now it was over and what ? Had she truly gone and handed herself to him on a platter for this ?

She blames herself more than him , but more than both of them she blamed this other woman . Freya .

Of course she had magic , of course she was reveling in all that she had now that she had him .

All the work , the effort they’d done , for him and herself . Well she hoped they enjoyed it .

He’s avoided her for sometime now but it seems today that ends as she hears a knock at her door .

“Enter .” She calls from her place on the bed . When she sees just who it is she cannot help but laugh , it’s a cold laugh , a bitter one .

“Erm .. m’lady .”

“Such formalities ,” she scoffs , “are we back to that ? Did we not once share a bed and so much more ?” She’s gritting her teeth trying desperately not to cry , to let her emotions win out .

“Morgana —,” she cuts him off then , she doesn’t let him try to fix this .

“No . No Merlin . It’s fine , you know what good for you , good for you finding someone worthy of your time and efforts . I should’ve known it was all lies ,” she finds she enjoys the way he winces and how he looks hurt , good because if he only knew , the secret she held , what she’d been going to tell him the day she’d walked in to find him lip locked with the other .

She can’t unsee it but what’s worse , what will truly be ingrained in her mind forever is the look he’d had . How his cheeks had flushed a bright red , how he hadn’t been able to meet her gaze , how he’d tried so hard to look sorry , to look hurt as if he hadn’t known what he was doing in the moment .

How he’d stumbled over his words in an attempt to tell her what it looked like as if that hadn’t been blatantly obvious .

She’d not even let him try , she’d cut him off , she’d told him she was happy he’d found someone worth his time . And she’d left them . Left that girl to comfort him . Left that girl to take what had been the only true happiness in her life . What could she do anyhow ? She couldn’t tell anyone , she’d be beheaded in the rolling of justice , especially if they found out this , the secret she now couldn’t tell besides their entire relationship .

She had holed up in her room , she’d thrown everyone into suspicion by that . Even her Father had come to check on her . Of all people .

And now she laid in bed , wrapped in her serving girls arms for some semblance of comfort .

“I think I shall take a leave ..” she mumbles .

The other woman quirks a brow , “My Lady ?” She clearly wasn’t certain what she meant . She runs fingers through long dark curls , holding her tightly around the waist . She hadn’t been able to comfort her friend in so long like this .

“I should leave Camelot , staying will only result in my death ,” she swallows thickly , she couldn’t stay . How would she ever explain this current predicament any how ?

“Morgana - you cannot mean that ? What could you possibly have done that would result in that ?” Gwen asks softly , no judgment in her tone .

“I will hope to tell you one day , but it’s definitely not safe for me to do here .”

And with that they both fall silent . Time passes and Gwen makes to her home to check in and rest .

Meanwhile the emerald eyed beauty finds herself swiping tears from her eyes , wiping them from her cheeks as she begins to pack a small satchel of essentials . Some coin , none in gold as she didn’t wish to be noticed for her money lest it would draw her unnecessary attention .

She throws on a cloak and hood up turns to look at her chambers one last time , the bed one last time , before she slips out silently .

Disappearing into the Darkling Woods and off into the night on the back of her steed from her youth . Her only friend from now on . Or so she tells herself that .

[hamgirly]

From _____ to __________{insert your best ship}

I crave your touch, but will never ask for it.

I want to hear your voice, but can’t bring myself to pick up the phone.

Your smile brings light to my darkness, but I’m too scared to make you laugh.

My trauma makes me incapable of asking for your love, but not from wanting it. So until you hear my silent cries, I will continue to live in the small moments we share and slowly die in the ones we don’t.

[fandomfaeofveryfewf4cks]

"Little Talks" by Of Monsters and Men keeps popping up in my lists and it's not like I don't like the song, but it's the ONLY Of Monsters and Men song it will pull up on its own and it won't even pull up their other stuff when I look under where it shows me stuff related to that song. I like Of Monsters and Men, and I like that song, but c'mon.

It's probably just trying to protect my Merthur-shipping heart from "King and Lionheart" though, because that song does kind of fuck me up and that is a song I will listen to on repeat. So, I guess I can't blame it too much.

[clueless1995]

EVEN THOUGH all i wanted to do was get into bed and attempt to sleep i still got up and gave merlin his snacks and played with him for a while i should win person of the year i think