#MARINE LIFE ENTHUSIAST BITCH
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spoopieere · 1 year ago
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Taking… pictures of Preston’s face from the movie, so that I may use em as references ✨
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shitouttabuck · 1 year ago
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question time :D
tagged by @buckitup 💘
1. were you named after anybody?
kind of! my grandad used to call my grandma “nina” as a nickname because “ni” means you and “na” means me in tamil and he was always like it’s you and me against the world so. as you can see i did not stand a single chance of not being the soppiest most hopeless romantic on this planet
2. when was the last time you cried?
northern attitude came on shuffle this morning and i thought about bobby nash for two (2) seconds and was like well here we go again
3. do you have kids?
nope!
4. do you use sarcasm a lot?
i don’t think so! im terrible at tone irl lol
5. what sports do you play/have you played?
football in school and…. i was a horse girl……. limited to a city but oh so enthusiastic
6. first thing you notice about someone?
ass for sure and i mean this so genuinely
7. eye colour?
very dark brown
8. scary movies or happy endings?
listen. scary movies can and should have happy endings. tell me why i was kicking my feet twirling my hair at the end of every single saw movie otherwise (saw franchise is my spiders georg. am actually a wuss. love a happy ending)
9. any special talents?
no! im good at opening jars and bottles. but just regular good not anything to write home about
10. where were you born?
india
11. what are your hobbies?
i like knitting but i haven’t done that in a while! idk i go to the movies i sometimes play cthulhu i think about writing fic and don’t actually write any
12. do you have pets?
there’s a family of feral cats on my back porch and unfortunately i’d die for them all. even sweet marie who is a huge bitch and hisses at me every morning
13. fave subject in school?
english! biology! went to this batshit school where in seventh grade we had a period called “tree study” and would spend an hour hanging out with a tree
14. dream job?
the million dollar question as i sit unemployed and unmoored in my parents house…… idk that post about flower shops was going around yesterday and i think i’d love to have a flower shop. real life maybe marine biologist….
tagging @zahlibeth @transboybuckley @sinistertolove @ice-sculptures @ringbearerjee @leothil if y’all feel like!!!
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minervahouse · 2 years ago
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why “mariners apartment complex” is so david coded
spoiler warning, etc. etc.
You took my sadness out of context, at the Mariners Apartment Complex, I ain't no candle in the wind
she reached for his arm, but he roughly shrugged it away. “this is where we leave each other,” he said. (tvs, 314)
I'm the bolt, the lightning, the thunder
going back… to see edward king’s son. and he was a complicated person to go back to. (tvs, 39)
Kind of girl who's gonna make you wonder, who you are and who you've been
before david, stevie had never had a boyfriend.(nine liars, 389)
And who I've been is with you on these beaches
david got out of the kayak, half falling, and got her up under his arm and moved her to the shore. (bitw, 312)
Your Venice bitch, your die-hard, your weakness
but once stevie was around david, something in her became wobbly. the lines and edges blurred. (hotw, 111)
Maybe I could save you from your sins
“both of us have real problems, but maybe we should make our weird personalities work for us.” (truly devious, 318)
So, kiss the sky and whisper to Jesus
whatever had happened between david and stevie didn’t exist at this moment. everything was dew and larry’s instant coffee and the gentle, buttery morning sun. (truly devious, 407)
My, my, my, you found this, you need this
she wanted… david. she wanted him. (truly devious, 315)
Take a deep breath, baby, let me in
was this really going to happen? the last foot of space between them was rapidly closed up, and david pressed his lips to hers. (truly devious, 242)
You lose your way, just take my hand
stevie could only concentrate on the feeling in her hand, the warmth of his palm against her skin, the message it conveyed. it was a need. a need for her strength. (tvs, 247)
You're lost at sea, then I'll command your boat to me again
“whoa… whoa…” david swung his legs over the side of the kayak and slipped into the water, catching her in a clumsy hold. (bitw, 311)
Don't look too far, right where you are, that's where I am
david had come a long way to be with her. her. that was the only reason he was here. (bitw, 227)
I'm your man
“he got to you once,” he said. “i didn’t want him to be able to get near you ever again.” (hotw, 288)
I'm your man
“these nice people will give me a minute to speak to my girlfriend, won’t they?” (hotw, 342)
They mistook my kindness for weakness
“and in the end, all I'd be doing is taking money from another person who wanted to buy me. this guy isn't asking for anything- he's nice- but he's also sticking it to his enemy.” (bitw, 382)
I fucked up, I know that, but, Jesus, can't a girl just do the best she can?
“do you think i can’t control myself or something? like i’m not serious about you? what have i done to make you feel like that? because i’ve kind of worked hard to stop being fuckup david and he this new one?” (nine liars, 171)
Catch a wave and take in the sweetness
he turned to her and grabbed her in a huge, enthusiastic embrace and started jumping up and down. she started jumping too, because it was hard not to jump, and because this was something worth jumping for. (hotw, 292)
Think about it, the darkness, the deepness, all the things that make me who I am
“because… my dad has messed up everything in my life. now he’s making a career of messing up everyone’s lives. but he can’t have this. he can’t have you. it sounds cheesy, but it’s all i’ve got.” (tvs, 221)
And who I am is a big-time believer, that people can change, but you don't have to leave her
“i thought you just left,” she said. “i wasn’t got i leave,” he replied. (bitw, 317)
When everyone's talking, you can make a stand
“because believe it or not, this is the right thing to do. it’s not easy. but it’s right. so what’s the bigger deal? what’s worth it?” (hotw, 141)
'Cause even in the dark, I feel your resistance
she wished she could see his expression now, but they were blind to each other. he held her face in his hands for a long moment, saying nothing- not kissing, not moving, not seeing. (tvs, 222)
You can see my heart burning in the distance
just the sound of david’s voice was all stevie needed to conjure david in his entirety (hotw, 85)
Baby, baby, baby, I'm your man (yeah)
it was david. her david. stevie and david. (nine liars, 389)
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ainosgarden · 7 months ago
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*opening my trench coat full of Machiko pics* PROPAGANDA ROUND 2 BITCHES GET READY TO BE HORNY
more dancing Machiko!! a versatile talent that can master any style!! goofy! sexy! spooky! elegant! you name it! she can do it!
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and judging by my previous propaganda, i sense a considerable thirst for menswear Machiko among you all...so behold, handsome Machiko in dashing motion from Black Lizard (1962)
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she's ethereal! she's sensual! she's mysterious! she's adorable! she's got weird eyebrows!
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SHE IS NOT ONLY HOT SHE IS EFFERVESCENT
finally, i'm summoning our reigning king Toshiro Mifune to help out his pal Machiko
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LOOK AT THESE CUTIES
LOOK AT HOW HOT MACHIKO LOOKS IN MARINE UNIFORM
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(btw the context for this is an educational promo they did for a sea training institute in 1952. Machiko herself is an avid sea fishing hobbyist and lover of boats and ships)
and for my Rashomon fans out there, my two favorite cast photos
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LOOK AT THESE DORKS <333 i love when actors do random photos in character and the second photo gives out such powerful middle-school-students-going-on-field-trip vibe it makes me chuckle every time i see it
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last of the last, introducing sizzling hot Machiko & Mifune in their lesser known film The Life of a Horsetrader (1951), which is famous for its 'wild-west' aesthetics and the Mifune's sumo scene (yes he wears sumo outfit yes he's basically butt naked and all sweaty and yes you can see milf Machiko in this clip as well)
so if yall Mifune booty/thighs enthusiasts found this gem bc of this propaganda you're obliged to vote my queen Machiko (Mifune said so when he called me)
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Propaganda
Machiko Kyō (Rashomon, Floating Weeds, Older Brother Younger Sister)— Considered an early sex symbol in Japanese cinema. Also just an ethereal beauty who can also go feral/unhinged in a glorious way.
Judy Garland (Meet Me In St. Louis, A Star is Born, Summer Stock)— Judy is the GOAT when it comes to classic movie musicals. The voice of an angel who deserved so much better than she got. She can sing she can dance she can act she's a triple threat. Though she had a turbulent personal life (her treatment as a child star by the studio system makes me mad as hell like Louis b Mayer fight me ((she was made to believe that she was physically unattractive by the constant criticism of film executives who made her feel ugly and who manipulated her onscreen appearance by capping her teeth and using discs in her nose to change its shape and Mayer called her "my little hunchback" like imagine hearing that as a child and not having damage)) she always goddamn delivered on screen and in any performance she gave. She began in vaudeville performing with her sisters and was signed to MGM at 13. Starting out in supporting parts especially paired with mickey Rooney in a bunch of films (she's the best part tbh) she eventually transferred to the lead role. She is best known for her starring role in movie musicals like the iconic Wizard of Oz (somewhere over the rainbow still hits hard and is ranked the top film song of all time), meet me in St. Louis (Judy singing have your self a merry little Christmas brings tears to the eyes she is that powerful), the Harvey girls (she looks like a technicolor dream and sings a catchy af song about trains), Easter parade ( dancing and singing with Fred Astaire), for me and my gal, the pirate, and summer stock ( with pal Gene Kelly who she helped when he was starting out and he helped her when she was struggling). But she also does non- singing just as well like the clock ( her first movie where she sings no songs and is an underrated ww2 era romance), her Oscar nominated a star is born ( like the man that got away she put her whole soul in that and I have beef with the fact she lost to grace kelly ((whom I love but like still not even her best work)), and judgement at Nuremberg (a courtroom drama about the nazi war criminal trials). Outside of film she made concert appearances to record-breaking audiences, released 8 studio albums, and had her own Emmy-nominated tv series. She was the youngest (39) and first female recipient of the Cecil B DeMille award for lifetime achievement in the film industry. Girl was a lifelong democrat and was a financial and moral supporter of many causes including the civil rights movement (she was at the March on Washington and held a press conference to protest the 16th street Baptist church bombings). She was a friend of the Kennedy family and would call jfk weekly often ending the calls by singing the first few lines of somewhere over the rainbow (she thought of them as Gemini twins).She was a member of the committee for the first amendment which was formed in response to the HUAC investigations. Though she died far too young and tragically she remains an icon for her work and her life. As a girl who didn't feel like i was as pretty as everyone else I have always felt a connection to Judy and I just really love her.
This is round 3 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Machiko Kyō:
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Judy:
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Judy's voice alone qualifies her for at least top ten hottest HOT VINTAGE MOVIE WOMEN. She was a truly incredible swing singer, with a stunning voice on top of her technique. Her short dark hair looked incredible in just about any style. Have I mentioned her swagger? I can’t do it justice with words. She had swagger. She was funny as hell, and clever too. Incredibly charming and cool. I adore her.
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Her eyes, her voice have bewitched me
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I mean how can you beat the one and only Judy? She's beautiful, her smile is contagious, the way she sings with her whole body. You can't help but love her.
youtube
Beautiful woman, love her singing voice. And she can do everything between happy or silly and angry or heartbroken
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jamaisjoons · 5 years ago
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intro: her XII ⤑ knj | m
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⟶ 𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦:〝 you enter namjoon’s life in the most unexpected of ways, but will you be able to stay, especially when he comes with three adorable but chaotic children, even more chaotic best friends and a bitch of an ex-wife? not to mention your own emotional baggage. 〞singe dad au.
❥ 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔: single dad!namjoon x marine vet!reader
❥ 𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑟𝑒: light angst ⋆ fluff
❥ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡: 5k
⟶ 𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: its basically just full of fluff, like nothing but fluff, reader is kinda stressed, but mostly fluff, minor possessive/jealous namjoon at the end
➵ 𝑎/𝑛: yeetHAW SURPRISE !! I managed to finish it off while on my break at work !! so here you go !!!
⏤ thank you to my love @shadowsremedy​ for beta reading this for me !
⇥ Previous || Masterlist || Next
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Eyes strained from the hours of paperwork, you sink back into your seat before exhaling deeply, and rubbing your tired eyes, your shoulders deflate wearily. Lately, work has been even more exhausting than usual: the aquarium transferring two nurse sharks to the exhibit. However, as the head veterinarian, it meant that everything falls onto you to make sure it runs smoothly: that the sharks are healthy and well looked after, that they’ll acclimatise to their new tank properly, that they won’t undergo any major stress of any kind; just general things like that. Though, the last one was easier said than done. Moving and handling of any animals would cause them stress.
Taking another deep breath, you roll your shoulders - working out the kinks in them. Once done, you look back at the huge stack of paperwork. Thick manila files are piled one on top of each other - and all of them need to be read and signed. Different though they are, whether they be health records, or the transfer document or even just general admin work make up the stack - they all have one thing in common. Every single one of them mocks you ceaselessly; the foreboding tower reminding you of the amount of work you still have to complete.
Defeated sigh escaping your lips, you decide to get back to work. After all, lamenting your workload isn’t going to deplete it. Though, before you can start looking at the next file, your phone rings from beside you. With a side glance, you sneak a peek at the contact ID, only to perk up when your boyfriend’s name flashes across the screen. Work long forgotten, you automatically move to pick it up; your finger sliding across the screen as you answer the call.
“Joonie! Hey,” you answer enthusiastically. Already, you can feel the tension in your muscles fade - the sounds of Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook yelling while Namjoon hushes them instantly soothing you.
“Hey babe, do you know what time you’ll be done today?” Namjoon’s deep voice echoes across the receiver.
Eyebrows furrowing, you glance at the clock that hangs above the door to your office. Seeing the time, your eyes widen. It’s already half six; you were supposed to be done half an hour go. “Oh shit-” you breathe out, “I didn’t even realise the time. I’ve still got a bunch of work to do though,” you continue, almost despondently. It’s a Friday evening, which means that you have the weekend to look forward to - but, you can’t leave until you’ve completed at least the more important paperwork.
“Ah- okay. Will you be coming over or going home?” Namjoon asks.
You hear Jungkook yelling in the background, cries of ‘No! Come over,’ echoing across your speaker. Biting your lip, you stare at the pile of paperwork. Once again, it mocks you - letting you know you can’t clock out until it’s done - no matter how much you want to go home to Namjoon and the boys.
“I- I’m not sure. I may finish really late and I don’t want to disturb you or anything,” you reply, barely trying to hide the upset in your voice.
Hearing your tired, strained tone, “Come over Angel, we’ll have a quiet night in. It’s also Yoongi-hyung’s birthday tomorrow, so we’re probably going to do something,” Namjoon says. Face crumpling, you nod - a quiet night in with your boyfriend sounds just like the stress relief that you need.
“Babe?” Namjoon calls out.
Realising that he can’t see you, “Oh! Sorry- yes, that sounds great. I’ll come over when I’m done. Do we need anything for Yoongi’s birthday?” you ask, a slight frown on your face. The stress of work had clearly gotten to you - you had no idea that it was already Yoongi’s birthday. It seems like you were just celebrating Hoseok’s birthday yesterday. Not that you’d done much - he’d just wanted a quiet dinner; which of course, was easier said than done, when half the guests were toddlers.
“Hmmm no- although, Taehyung mentioned wanting to bake Yoongi-hyung a cake. But that sounds messy, and I don’t really know how to bake so,” Namjoon replies offhandedly.
Perking up immediately, “we can do that! Please, Joon? Can we bake? Pretty please?” you practically beg. Across the phone, Namjoon pauses, before you hear a soft laugh.
“Someone’s excited. But alright, we can do that. Well, you can. We both know I’m useless in the kitchen,” Namjoon answers. Suppressing a yelp of victory, you pump your fist in the air before stilling. Cheeks searing with the heat of embarrassment, you silently thank whatever guardian angel is watching you. At least your boyfriend hadn’t seen that. “Alright, I have to go. Taehyung wants a snack and he looks like he’s about to cry,” Namjoon continues.
Laughing, “well you better go then. If Tae cries, that’ll only set Chim off too,” you respond knowingly.
“Yeah, exactly. I’ll see you at home then,” Namjoon says. Then, with a sweet goodbye, he hangs up the phone.
Placing your phone back onto your desk, you turn back to the huge stack of paperwork. Invigorated by your conversation with Namjoon, and the thought of going home to your boyfriend and his sons - not to mention the prospect of baking - you suddenly feel a renewed fire in your stomach. Hastily, you grab the next file before you begin reading it. All of a sudden, you have a reason to finish up your work.
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As you’d planned, after you’d completed all the important paperwork, you’d gone home to grab your baking equipment before driving straight to your boyfriend’s home. Seeing the stress on your face late last night, Namjoon had gathered you into his arms before taking you to bed - the boys already being fast asleep by the time you had arrived. You remember Namjoon helping you change, and how attentive he’d been the entire night; however, you don’t remember falling asleep. As a matter of fact, the only thing that you do remember, is that you haven’t had such good sleep in over a week. Somehow, falling asleep in Namjoon’s arms, had melted all the stress of your hectic week and you’d woken up feeling completely refreshed.
Thus, you find yourself in Namjoon’s kitchen the next day. Namjoon sits at the kitchen counter, his laptop and various pieces of paper scattered on the surface as he tries to get some work done. Tried, being the keyword. Really, he’d given up a while back and instead, his eyes are glued to your figure as you flit about his kitchen. You’re still dressed in your pyjamas and, well, so is he. In fact, no one had really felt like getting changed, and so even his sons are still running about in last night’s clothing.
Still, his eyes rake over your figure. With your hair piled into a messy bun on the top of your head: stray flyaways flying about everywhere as you concentrate on baking Yoongi’s cake, and dressed in a pair of loose flannel bottoms and his hoodie: the large grey article of clothing hanging from your frame; you’re the epitome of comfort. Flour stains the material, and he can see little gooey strings of eggs in some spots. You’re nothing but an unkempt mess - but still, you look incredibly endearing.
Soft melodious music echoes through his speakers, your body softly swaying to the beat as you hum along to the tune and involuntarily, Namjoon finds his eyes softening at the utter ease in your figure. The sweet scent of vanilla wafts through the air, causing Namjoon’s mouth to water at the sugary, enticing smell. You’re in the middle of icing the cake - Namjoon’s eyes following your graceful movements as you cover the sponge with the creamy frosting.
Helpless under your enchantment, Namjoon decides to abandon his work: it’s not like he was getting anything done in the first place. Standing up from his seat, he crosses his kitchen and within a few moments, you feel your boyfriend behind you. Namjoon’s strong arms curl around you, his hands loosely resting on your hips. At the feel of his comforting presence, you instinctively relax further, your back moulding against his chest.
His head immediately drops down to your neck, his nose nuzzling the flesh as he presses his feathery kisses to the column of your throat. Feeling his plush lips brush over your supple flesh, “Joonie, stop that,” you giggle.
“No,” Namjoon pouts, pressing another kiss to your skin - this time just under the corner of your jaw.
Playfully batting his face - Namjoon narrowly dodging - “I’m trying to concentrate!” you reprimand, thought from the light laughter in your voice, Namjoon knows you’re not really mad. So, instead, he lets out his own teasing growl before squeezing your hips.
“So was I, but you distracted me. So, now I’m going to distract you,” he replies. You roll your eyes at his logic, but don’t say anything else. Rather, you return back to frosting your cake.
Namjoon steps a little closer to you, his arms snaking around your hips so he can hold you in his arms. You feel his large palms intertwine before resting against your lower abdomen. Softly, his body sways with yours, the two of you moving to the beat of the music. Namjoon knows he’s not the best dancer, yet, with you in his arms, he can’t help, but follow the gentle swaying of your body - the movement coming easily to him. Meanwhile, from beside the two of you, Taehyung’s little form peers over the edge of the counter, his little hands braced on the marble countertop as he pokes his head over the ledge. “What are you doing now?” he asks, his eyes following your movements curiously.
“I’m crumb coating the cake - so that none of the cake crumbs gets on the outside later on,” you reply without skipping a beat.
“Do you like baking, Noona?” Taehyung’s soft voice continues as he turns to you in intrigue. Breaking from your concentration while you run the stainless steel palette knife over the edge edges, you glance at Taehyung.
“Mhm, it’s one of my favourite things,” you reply. Taehyung nods his head, but turns back to the half iced cake. One eyebrow raising, you attempt to suppress a little giggle. “Do you want to help me, Tigger?” you ask. All of a sudden, Taehyung perks up before nodding enthusiastically.
From behind you, Namjoon uncurls his arms from your frame, only to pull one of the barstools closer before picking his son up and depositing him onto the cushion. Once he’s sure his son is safely on the stool, he turns back to you - only to be stopped when Jimin tugs at his trouser leg. Motioning to his father with grabby hands, Jimin looks at his father with wide eyes and a soft pout. Immediately, Namjoon bends over, and stepping to your side, easily lifts Jimin up into his arms.
Turning his eyes, Namjoon lets out a soft chuckle at the sight of his final child. Unbothered, Jungkook sits with his back to one of the cabinets - his eyes glued to the screen of his game and a bowl of snacks situated next to him. Unlike Jimin and Taehyung, it seems Jungkook couldn’t care less about the cake. Though, he supposes, it makes sense: since it was originally Taehyung’s idea - and Jimin always wanted to do whatever Taehyung did - and vice versa.
Namjoon turns back to you - just in time to see Taehyung reach over to grab the bowl of icing. However, in his son’s enthusiastic haste - he almost knocks into the cake. Acting on reflex, honed from years of chasing his troublemaking twins, Namjoon’s hand shoots out and steadies the cake - his fingers gripping the cake board to prevent it from toppling over.
Turning to his middle child, Namjoon looks at him with soft reprimanding eyes, “be careful, Taehyung, we don’t want to ruin ____’s hard work now, do we?” he says.
“Sorry, daddy,” Taehyung says sheepishly.
Seeing the slight pout, and the way his eyes darken, “It’s alright! We got it in time, didn’t we?” you say, winking at Taehyung while petting his hair. At your words, and realising you’re not mad at him, the sadness in Taehyung’s eyes fades away. Once he’s perked up, you angle the handle of the palette knife to Taehyung.
Eagerly, but with more restraint this time, Taehyung grabs the utensil from you. You help him dip it into the bowl of icing - then, wrapping your large hand around his, you both begin layering the frosting over the rest of the cake. With the two of you frosting the sponge, Namjoon and Jimin stand next to you both - Jimin pointing out different places that need more buttercream while Namjoon simply watches. Though, every now and then his eyes dart to the buttery icing, his mouth salivating at the mere sight of it.
Eventually, once the cake has been iced, you drop the palette knife back into the bowl before pushing it to the side. Unnoticed to you, Namjoon’s eyes follow the movement, his eyes lighting up when he notices a soft mound of the buttercream still left over. Briefly, he contemplates whether he can sneak some away from you and his sons - but that will have to come later.
Meanwhile, you cross the kitchen, and grab your bag of store-bought decorations. If you had more time, you’d consider making them yourself - but sadly, that wasn’t the case this time. Upending the bag, you scatter the boxes and packets across the counter. Immediately, Taehyung and Jimin squeal - their small pudgy hands moving to grab the different packets.
“This one!” they both shout simultaneously, holding up different packages of cake decorations. With a laugh, you nod at both of them.
Stepping back slightly, Namjoon watches as Jimin and Taehyung move in closer to you, their knees perched on the barstools as their hands and chests lean onto the counter. Taehyung’s face is a picture of concentration as he hands one of his embellishments while Jimin points out where you should put them before they swap, Jimin handing you one of his decorations and Taehyung pointing out where you should put it.
There’s no real rhyme or reason to the way the boys garnish the cake and shortly, it’s covered in a plethora of random decorations. Soon, both rainbow coloured and chocolate sprinkles clutter the top, various different embellishments, from chocolate buttons to sugar flowers, litter the cake edges sporadically; and the borders are piped in different sized peaks of soft buttercream. Namjoon knows you love to bake: you’d mentioned once in passing that you used to do it as a stress reliever during university, and he also knows that cake decorating is one of your favourite things: your Instagram feed chock-full of random pastry chefs and amateur bakers. Yet, you still listen to his sons - entertaining their chaotic creativity as you adorn the cake with a plethora of confectionary and colours.
Jungkook is the only one still not involved, by some surprise, and with a quick side glance, Namjoon sees his son’s eyes still glued to the screen of his game console, his hand reaching for his snacks every now and then. Realising both you, and all three of his sons, are otherwise preoccupied, Namjoon turns back to the bowl of icing left forgotten on the side of the counter. Instantly, his eyes light up, and with sneaking glances towards you and his sons, he licks his lips before turning back to the bowl.
Slowly, Namjoon steps away from you - moving purposely so as not to arouse your suspicions. For most of it, you barely notice him, too engrossed in your cake - however, his strange actions garner Jungkook’s attention. Putting his game down, Jungkook watches as his father sneaks across the kitchen, only to quietly pull out a spoon and dip it into icing. Slowly, Jungkook waddles to his father, eyes trained on the way Namjoon licks up the sugary cream from the spoon.
“Daddy, can I have some?” Jungkook asks as he tugs his father’s leg - trying to draw Namjoon’s attention.
“Okay, but don’t tell Noona,” Namjoon quietly whispers. Easily, he picks up his son, only to place him onto one of the seats before pushing the bowl towards him. Jungkook quickly nods - but doesn’t say anything else, instead, poking his little fingers into the frosting.
So engrossed in your cake, you barely notice Jimin sneak away - leaving you and Taehyung to your devices as he joins his father and younger brother. However, after a little while longer, Taehyung disappears as well. Nonetheless, you chalk it down to getting bored and continue to finish up the last of the cake. Once it’s done, you let out a little victory cheer before looking up. However, the first thing you notice, is that Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook’s fingers are all in the bowl, their lips stained with the white buttercream frosting.
“What are you doing? You know that’s basically all sugar - it’s not good for you. What would Namjoon say-” you automatically begin reprimanding. However, when you spot your boyfriend next to them, looking equally guilty - plush lips wrapped around a metal spoon - you let out a little sigh and shake your head. “You know what, he won’t say anything because I have a feeling he’s the reason you’re eating plain buttercream in the first place,” you continue, looking at him pointedly.
Immediately, the three boys nod.
“Daddy said not to tell you! It’s all his fault!” Jungkook says, pointing to his father.
“Yeah! Daddy said we could,” Taehyung chimes in. Swiftly, you pull your bottom lip between your teeth and bite down on it in order to suppress your giggle.
“I saw Daddy and Jungkook eating it, so I wanted to as well,” Jimin butts in.
“Jimin! Taehyung! Jungkook!” Namjoon gasps, looking at his sons in utter betrayal. The sight of his shocked eyes causes you to splutter, and then, immediately you’re laughing.
“Oh my god, they totally ratted you out,” you snicker. Across the counter, Namjoon pouts, his sons giggling to themselves too.
“I can’t believe this. My own sons sold me out to my own girlfriend,” Namjoon teasingly laments. With another snicker, you cross the kitchen and towards him. Standing in front of him, you wind your hands around his waist and leaning on your tiptoes, you kiss the tip of his nose.
“It’s what you deserve, letting them eat plain sugar like that,” you answer, your eyes twinkling with mischief. Naturally, Namjoon’s arms wrap around you as he draws you closer to him.
Dipping his head down, he brushes his lips against yours, causing you to gasp. Reflexively, you poke your tongue out to lick your lips and a breathy moan falling from your mouth when you taste the sweetened vanilla on your lips. “It’s not funny, my love. I’m really hurt, you know. Will you kiss it better?” Namjoon asks, a roguish smile curling onto his lips. His warm breath fans across your face, your eyes fluttering as the saccharine aroma of both Namjoon and the buttercream wafts through your nose.
Breath hitching in your throat, your hands trail up his chest to curl around his neck, pulling him closer to you. “It’s a figurative hurt, where am I supposed to kiss?” you reply cheekily, your own eyes twinkling with mischief as you look up at him through the thick of your lashes.
Once again, Namjoon hums. It’s deeper this time, however - a little more sensuous. “I think I know,” he replies. Then, without giving you any time to think about it, his lips descend onto yours.
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Cake box in one hand, and Jungkook holding your other, you walk into the lobby of JinHit’s building - Namjoon ushering in his twins behind you. As soon as you get in, you notice Seokjin and Hoseok standing, speaking to each other.
“Hyung!” Taehyung calls out, tugging on his father’s hand as he tries to run towards them. Immediately, Seokjin and Hoseok turn around, greeting the five of you with a wave.
“Oh wow, did you buy a cake?” Seokjin asks, peering at the white cake box in curiosity.
Immediately, “Noona baked it! Hyungie and I helped!” Jimin says proudly, a bright smile on his face.
Hoseok quirks his eyebrows, “did you now? And where was Jungkookie in all of this?” he questions, turning to the youngest.
“Playing games,” Jungkook simply shrugs, not thinking anything of it. His deadpan answer causes Hoseok and Seokjin to laugh before they nod.
“Alright, and I assume you just watched?” Seokjin chuckles while clapping Namjoon on the back.
Before he can reply, “watched? More like distracted me and then ate the rest of the icing,” you snort - once again looking at him pointedly. Namjoon’s mouth curls, his ears burning bright red as he pouts.
“Oh yeah, that makes sense,” Hoseok replies, nodding sagely, “did he try eating sugar out of the spoon again?” he continues. Both you and Seokjin snicker, Namjoon letting out a sigh of exasperation.
“Can we just go? We’re here to celebrate Yoongi’s birthday, not make fun of me,” Namjoon pouts, a slight whiny tone to his voice. Seeing the sheepishness in his eyes, you adjust the cake box in your hold before shuffling closer and kissing his jaw in comfort. Head angling down to you, Namjoon smiles softly in thanks before returning your kiss - his lips brushing against your temple.
“Gross,” Hoseok gripes playfully, causing both you and Namjoon to stick your tongues out at him.
“Alright, alright. Let’s go, Yoongi’s probably wondering where we are,” Seokjin says - playing peacemaker in Yoongi’s stead. Then, he gestures the lot of you to follow him.
Contrary to Seokjin’s words, however, Yoongi was in no way waiting for you. Walking into the meeting room upstairs, you come to an empty room - Seokjin letting out a sigh of frustration. “God damn it! I told him to meet us here. Did he forget?” Seokjin grouses, his eyebrows furrowing in exasperation.
“Knowing hyung, he’s still in his studio,” Hoseok points out. His words, however, only causes Seokjin to let out a sigh of frustration.
“Let’s just go to his studio,” he replies before ushering you out of the room. Once again, he navigates the lot of you through the various corridors of the building - before you come upon a large wooden door. A gold plaque hangs on it, the words ‘Genius Lab’ embossed in black on the metal plate.
Aggressively, Seokjin begins knocking - practically banging his fist against the door. “Yah! Min Yoongi! Did I not tell you to be in the meeting room?” he yells. Instantly, the door swings wide open, Yoongi standing in the doorway.
Quirking an eyebrow, “I was waiting - but you’re like ten minutes late - so I decided to do some work,” Yoongi replies, his face passive as usual.
“Sorry, there was a bit of traffic,” you apologise with a small bow. Yoongi opens his mouth to reply, however, before he can say anything, Namjoon’s sons are running up to him.
Jimin and Taehyung wrap their arms around each one of his legs, Jungkook standing between them and winding his own arms around Yoongi’s waist. “Yoonie hyung! Happy birthday!” they sweetly chorus at the same time. Immediately, Yoongi’s face softens, and instinctively, he pets their heads, a shy smile on his face while he nods at them.
A bright grin plastered onto his face, “Noona, Hyungie and I baked you a cake!” Jimin says proudly, causing you to shyly hold up the cake box. Yoongi’s eyes twinkle slightly before he’s stepping to the side. Taking his cue, you all quickly enter his studio.
Swiftly, you unbox the cake, and while Hoseok holds it up - you sing happy birthday. The entire time, Yoongi’s cheeks are bunched up under his eyes, his bright gummy smile on display while he bounces in place. After you’re done, and Yoongi’s cut his cake, everyone sporadically finds seats around Yoongi’s studio. Hoseok, Jimin and Taehyung sit on the floor, the younger twin in the older man’s lap as Jimin happily eats his cake beside them. Seokjin sits on the sofa, Jungkook in his father’s lap - leaving you to sit on the sofa arm besides Namjoon.
“So, are you working on anything interesting?” you ask, idly chewing on your cake while addressing Yoongi.
Nodding, “I’m actually working on a new song - do you want to hear?” Yoongi asks. Eyelids blowing wide open, you freeze in place before your jaw drops open.
“A-Are you sure?” you stutter out. Was he really offering you an exclusive sneak peek of his future track? God, sometimes you really forget that your, now, closest friends are huge musical celebrities. Sure, your own boyfriend is a famous rapper, as is Hoseok, but other than that discussion about their upcoming tour, you’ve never really gotten involved with their jobs. Namjoon rarely tended to bring it up at home, wanting to focus more on his sons and your relationship. Besides, Yoongi had always been your favourite rapper - and just the thought of getting to listen to a demo of his song has your heart racing.
“Earth to ____?” Seokjin says, waving his hand in front of your face with a playful laugh. Quickly, you bat his hand away before glaring at him with a pout, your cheeks heating from embarrassment.
“Look at her! She’s blushing like a little girl, oh my god,” Hoseok begins taunting, then he pauses. “Wait- didn’t you mention Yoongi is your favourite rapper when we first met?” he asks, a knowing smirk curling onto his face.
Features twisting into a scowl, you sneer at him, “well it’s definitely not you. You’re too mean to me,” you snidely reply, before sticking your tongue out.
Wincing jokingly, “ouch, you really wound me, ____” Hoseok dramatically sighs, clutching his heart and shaking his head.
“It’s because I’m the nicest to her,” Yoongi chimes in, nodding sagely.
“Hey! I’m nice to her,” Hoseok yells in indignation.
However, ignoring Hoseok, “Wait- Yoongi, are you sure I can listen?” you ask, remembering Yoongi’s first question.
He turns back to you before nodding and rolling his chair a little to the side. “Yeah, come on,” Yoongi beckons. Eyes lighting up with joy, you shoot off the sofa and over to him in an instant.
The moment you move, Namjoon blinks at the unexpected movement. The entire time Hoseok had teased you, he’d felt a little upset. Of course, he’d always known Yoongi is your favourite rapper - and he’d never begrudge you for it. Nonetheless, he’d be lying if he said he wasn’t just a little upset that he’s not your favourite. Gaze trained on you, Namjoon watches as Yoongi pressed one of the headphone speakers to his ear, offering the other to you, before opening up the track and clicking play.
As soon as the beat begins, your eyebrows knit together, your lips a firm line. He knows the expression well: very rarely do you bring home paperwork - both of you prefer to keep work out of your relationship - but the few times you have, he’s watched that exact same expression of concentration, your pen flitting over the papers. Every now and then, your eyes twinkle, a short gasp falling from your lips as you nod to the beat. Unable to help himself, Namjoon cannot stop the swell of jealousy, sadness and a slight twinge of possessiveness that wells up inside him.
When you shuffle a little closer to Yoongi, your ears pressed together as you share the headphones, Namjoon knows he can’t watch anymore. Quietly, he passes Jungkook over to Seokjin before shuffling out of the room. Hoseok and Seokjin look at each other, exchanging a brief knowing glance between themselves. As soon as you spot Namjoon’s movement from the corner of your eye, before you watch him softly slam the door shut, you draw away from Yoongi.
Turning to the other two, “Is he okay?” you ask, your eyebrows knotting together in concern.
“I think he’s a little jealous,” Seokjin replies softly. For a moment, you almost dismiss him, until you see the seriousness in his eyes.
“What? Why?” you ask, confusion lacing your voice.
“Just watching you and Yoongi, maybe? Like we all know there’s nothing going on, but like, yeah,” Hoseok tries explaining, rubbing the back of his head. “He’s probably a little mad too,” he continues. Seeing your face fall, Hoseok quickly shakes his head, “Not at you! At himself for feeling the way he is- he’s probably just trying to control himself and needed a breather,” he finishes. Placated by Hoseok’s words, you nod, knowing he’d never lie to you. However, his words don’t stop your heart clenching in your chest, your stomach dropping. You’d never wanted to make him feel upset - or jealous.
“I think I’ll go speak to him,” Yoongi cuts in, already getting up from his seat. Quickly, you shake your head, already shooting up to your feet.
“No!” you abruptly interject. Shuffling over to the cake, you cut a large piece of it before placing it on a paper plate. “It’s okay. I think it’d be better if I go. Watch my boys for me yeah?” you say once you're done, before shooting out of the room, not even waiting for a response.
The moment the door slams shut, the three of them turn to each other. “Do you think she noticed she used ‘my’ or…?” Seokjin asks.
With a wistful smile, “No, I don’t think she did,” Yoongi replies, shaking his head fondly.
“Well, looks like your Noona may become your mommy soon,” Hoseok chimes in as he directs his attention to the boys.
Ecstatically, Taehyung turns in Hoseok’s lap, looking at the older man in wide-eyed wonder. Standing up in his lap - Hoseok wincing when the entirety of his weight pushes down on his legs - Taehyung presses his pudgy hands against Hoseok’s cheeks before squishing them together, “Really?” the toddler asks, his voice full of excitement and hope.
Laughing, Hoseok nods his head in Taehyung’s hold, “really,” he replies. Seokjin and Yoongi nodding along to his sentiment.
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a/n: this was actually supposed to have smut in it but like it got so long without it that i’ve just decided that the next chapter will be solely smut 🤡 so owo look forward to that !! whenever it comes out !!
Kofi | Masterlist
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lassieposting · 3 years ago
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I'm curious, why did you stop working at the aquarium? This ask prompted by me just watching a video about a girl who worked in a pet shop in the UK and was utterly repulsed by the abhorrent conditions of the animals there, so I'm mainly wondering did you just have to bail because you couldn't deal with the animals being not okay/dying
I did not!
Okay so, pet shop conditions, especially for fish, have always rubbed me the wrong way, but I don't know enough about them to weigh in. I've never worked in a pet shop, so that's just my personal gut feeling based on seeing the amount of enrichment these places put in their fishtanks, i.e. none.
The place I worked was an actual aquarium - a tourist attraction. So we're not talking little pet store fish you can have at home. We had dangerous animals - seals, sharks, that sort of thing. And every single colleague in my department (aquarists - "fish zookeepers") while I was there was passionate about animal welfare - although, to be fair, there were only like five of us including me. One was doing a marine biology masters. Another helps run a rescue service for injured baby seals in her time off. One of the guys was really into coral reef restoration. They were a really passionate group of people, and they cared deeply about our animals. From my first day they were constantly pushing that the animals' comfort and quality of life was top priority.
The reason I eventually had to quit was that I just couldn't afford it anymore. I started as a volunteer a couple days a week, doing the chores the trained aquarists didn't have time to do. I was passionate and enthusiastic and I kept bugging them for more responsibility so over time I got taught everything else as well, from cleaning out the seal pens to giving talks to visitors to feeding the sharks. Eventually I was basically doing the same amount and type of work as the paid members of the team, for the same hours - except I wasn't being paid for it, and it cost me money to get there.
And I was okay with that, because I was working somewhere I really enjoyed, and I was learning skills that would help me get a paid job in that industry later on, from people who actually loved what they were doing and weren't just there for the money. I can't go back to uni and retrain because ya bitch is poor, so opportunities to learn skills like that are invaluable. I knew they didn't have the funds or the space to take on another full-timer, the boss was upfront with me about that, and I was happy to keep working there anyway. But yeah, eventually it just wasn't really financially feasible anymore. Buses here are expensive as fuck and a bitch aint got no money.
And then covid hit, and you wouldn't have gotten me on a bus if you paid me anyway, because people here are morons and won't wear masks.
I miss it though. I loved that job.
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darkpoisonouslove · 4 years ago
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Winx Club Season 5 Thoughts Part 1
It’s been so hard for me to make myself start this season because I know it only goes downhill from here but here I am at last. I don’t remember anything from this season and am prepared to hate the transformations (Harmonix because it’s impractical and Sirenix because it’s ugly) so let’s do this.
- I already hate the hair and I haven’t made it past the intro yet. This is promising.
- This is off to a great start. I got the wrong episode. Not by my mistake, however. Now that I found the actual first one, let’s actually do this.
5x01:
- It’s weird to see magic so publicly on Earth. At least they’re having fun. Though, I have to say that I am not a fan of the idea of them having a band. And they have unfair advantage over every other Earth band because they can do their own advertizing without having to pay a cent and it will still be better than any other band can afford since it’s magic. They should have just dropped the band.
- I am gagging over the fact that they have Roxy praise Bloom for the help but not the other Winx girls. They were all there for her and fought to protect her and tried to teach her magic. And at one point she even said she wanted to be like Stella. But now she says that only Bloom is like a big sister. Obviously a plot device to bring in Daphne since she will be resurrected this season and they have to set it up. Especially after season 4 forgot all about her. I am still gagging, though.
- You know, I could have loved the whole ecological message but I am pretty sure they are going to fuck it up anyway. Or just not take it anywhere.
- Ugh, Helia’s hair is so ugly. But at least Sky’s is as well. But what is that box Sky has? Not another engagement ring, please, for the love of everything sacred!
- Ahh, pendant. Yeah, their relationship is going so well that they will need magic to keep it in tact. Though, good luck for both of them will be to just split up and find someone that is actually good for them. Also, why doesn’t Brandon know about that? He is literally the squire and best friend of the prince.
- Poor Layla. She must be missing Nabu like crazy. Please, let her have a season to mourn and don’t shove a new love interest in her face right away. It took her a season and a half to get the first one and he was killed. She needs some fucking time!
- Love that everyone agrees that Sky’s hair is terrible. Even Bloom’s “It looks... great” sounds like a lie.
- Why is Sky going back to Red Fountain? Didn’t he finish that? God, just let them move on already. Also, he is not A Crown Prince now. He was the Crown Prince ever since he was born. He was crowned as the king of Eraklyon. Man, are they retconning everything?
- If Bloom cared so much about what he had to say, she could have asked Musa to give them a sec. I like the little Flora and Sky interaction, though. If only it could have been on a topic different than Bloom. I wish the Specialists would interact with Winx other than their girlfriends more. It would sell the friend group vibe better.
- Aww, I wish Layla wouldn’t hide her pain over Nabu. She probably doesn’t want to affect the others with it and doesn’t want them fretting over her either but this is just so sad.
- Love how Bloom doesn’t even remember Tressa. For a moment there I thought that it was her getting crowned which would have been cooler but yeah. Also, Nereus and Tritannus are almost identical. What the hell makes Nereus hot and Tritannus not? I am so annoyed I started rhyming.
- I love the idea of underwater tech!
- Lmao, gotta love how the king has already picked a favorite. And it doesn’t seem to be a recent choice either. Idk about Tritannus yet, but I don’t like this guy. I am all for him being attacked. He even reacted like an absolute asshole. He reminds me of Erendor.
- Ah, of course. Trident. We couldn’t possibly have another weapon when it comes to merfolk.
- Tbh Tressa would be the best ruler. She seems to have learned her lesson and become braver. And if she’s protecting her brother and doing all the work anyway, why not just crown her?
- Didn’t Flora tell him to wait until he is alone with Bloom? Why did he think a good moment to give her the pendant would be when Layla is visibly worried about what is going on and everyone is there with them? I wish he’d drop it and it would break.
- How the fuck can Flora tell that there is oil spilling into the ocean? The ocean is Layla’s domain and Flora has never been shown to be able to communicate with marine plant life.
- I hate how they had to show that Timmy is obviously physically weaker than Sky. It would’ve made sense for him to had built some muscle at the very least after 4-5 years in Red Fountain.
- How the hell did Tecna delete the oil? You can’t just erase matter out of existence. There should be a rule against that.
- Yeah, I was just going to say that closing the pipes is not going to work if they don’t stop the flow of oil. The pipes might explode but it will keep spilling. Seriously, this is basic logic. Nice move. Now it will be harder to stop because the spill moved underwater.
- What happened to Layla’s wings? Is the oil sticking to them and hindering their movements? You’d think she could prevent that with magic.
- This is what happens when you carelessly put something so important in your pocket. You don’t even need to be running a rescue mission. There’s a high chance that you’re gonna lose it anyway. Also, love how Bloom just left the other guy to drown and no one else went after him either.
- Layla’s awesome. She even managed to pull that guy out even though she was struggling a lot with it. I hate the fact that they forgot she taught the others a spell to breathe underwater in season 3, though. They could have used it. But of course, that would have probably rendered Harmonix unnecessary.
- Wow, they renovated the whole platform to make it eco? Why don’t they just do that with all of the oil platforms on Earth then? It’s not like it took much effort. I want to add to this that if they’d just done that (which probably would have taken a couple of days), they could have easily defeated Tritannus later because his only source of pollution in the first half of the season has been Earth. Because there is ocean pollution only on Earth, you know. They could have used that to incorporate an ecological message, except that would have taken work on their part. And also, most of the toxic substances Tritannus consumed were spilled on purpose by the Trix. So there goes a great wasted opportunity for a thematic message.
5x02:
- Here are my bad bitches. What the hell are they doing underwater, though? It’s kinda cruel to put them in a prison that forces them to use magic if they want to survive it. What happens if they tire out? They could die,
- Aaaand for some reason Bloom is the vocalist of the band even though Musa is literally the fairy of music and the only one that was initially having a contract signed.
- I hope nobody is expecting any commentary from me on the musical performances because I am telling you from now that I will be skipping absolutely all of them.
- The selkies look ridiculous. I could appreciate the idea of having small beings being powerful guardians but they will certainly not serve any greater purpose than the pixies did so this is going to be annoying at best. Also, the selkie of Earth was still there even when the fairies weren’t, right? This somehow implies that magical beings couldn’t stop the disasters that mankind causes to Earth even though the previous season said that it was the disappearance of fairies that threw the Earth into chaos.
- Aww, look at Stella and Brandon! So good when there’s no stupid drama.
- People really went cleaning the beach not just willingly but enthusiastically? That sounds a little unbelievable. I mean, they were supposed to be at a concert and that was an abrupt change.
- Correction, I wish Sky hadn’t lost the pendant so that he could have given it to her and this would have been over. Now he is going to sulk about it for ages and he is probably going to fuck up in a self-fulfilled prophecy kinda manner and I am so not here for it. Just shut up about Bloom and Sky and focus on the action, please.
- Well, Icy is now canonically a monster fucker. Even though she thought Valtor was ugly as hell in season 3 when he turned into a demon. He was uglier than Tritanus in all fairness but still. This seems inconsistent. And I hate her voice. Not to mention that she is already acting OOC when she’s not thinking about getting out even but about fucking him. Come on!
- Is the whole turning into a monster thing some sort of reverse Beauty and the Beast? That could have been interesting... but, of course, this is Winx.
- Yep, the selkies are absolutely useless.
- If the Trix don’t have powers, then how are they breathing underwater? Also, how does toxic waste restore ice and storm powers (there is some connection to darkness at least)? And if they went that route, they could have made their powers have an element of toxicity to them to make it more interesting instead of just having a guy boost their powers yet again. Honestly, the only good thing that came out of this is that Darcy and Stormy seem to be thinking more independently now which would be necessary in order for the DramaTM between the Trix later (that is just about the only thing I remember from this season).
- I wish Darcy would have used her hypnotic powers more in the previous seasons. They are so cool and would be pretty hard to deal with once you’re hit. It could have made for more interesting fights.
- If Tritannus was good, he could actually help cleanse the oceans by sucking out all toxic waste. He likes being a monster anyway.
- Okay, but the Trix know Bloom is from Earth. They should have known it was Winx from the second they felt the fairy magic in the air. That took them long enough btw.
- Of course, the monsters can also go on land even though they are mer-creatures. Makes perfect sense.
- Love how Musa and Flora are using new spells yet they look and act exactly the same way like the old ones so it is just same shit, different story. The writers are so unoriginal.
- Layla is strong! And Winx seem to be a little too strong against the Trix. Although, Believix is supposed to be really powerful anyway.
- This could have been the perfect setup for an Icy x Bloom romance. Sky lost the pendant so his relationship with Bloom is doomed and he later lost his memory so why not just break them up. Diaspro can have him if she still wants him (I don’t know why she would but anyway) and Bloom can get with Icy after Icy realizes Tritannus is not the right one for her. Everyone wins, especially, us, the audience. And it could have been a good way to show that Diaspro has reformed and she and Sky could actually be an okay couple. Or better yet, she dumps him and gets together with Bloom and Icy.
- Layla just kicked Tritanus in the face. Boy, I stan! And the underwater battle with weapons instead of magic is super cool, I love it! Wish there’d been more of that but, of course, only Layla can pull that off and we can’t spend more than a minute focusing on anyone else other than Bloom. Why didn’t Tritannus recognize Layla, though? Or did he just not care?
- Icy crying out for help? By a man? So not here for this. It is ridiculously out of character. How is he so powerful? Once again the villain is so strong it is a wonder they ever got to live long enough to get to the finale let alone defeat him.
5x03:
- Well, Winx sure are at the top of the popularity wave again despite the last time we saw them at Alfea being very different. Also, why is it the beginning of another school year yet again? Honestly, I am so sick of all of this.
- Sky is seriously annoying me with that stupid pendant and he is also the one that is fucking up their relationship with his stupid behavior. He should just focus on being a good boyfriend and do the best he can. I get it that in a world of magic superstitions probably have more merit, but he still has control over his own life and the choices he makes. He can “save” their relationship despite the omen of doom.
- Ugh, don’t tell me there will be Helia and Flora drama in this season to compensate for the lack of such in the last? Why did he only introduce Flora as his friend and not as his girlfriend? And how is he so close with the princess of Linphea? Is he from Linphea as well?
- I agree with Stella. Just when we all thought they were done, they started making even more transformations.
- I don’t think we’ve seen Daphne be anything but calm but it’s understandable when she is talking about the thing that made her a disembodied spirit. Still it feels weird to see her not believe that Bloom can handle whatever comes her way. Especially after the defeat of the Ancestral Witches. I guess that is what bugs me in this scene.
- Wow, Darcy admitted that Winx are stronger than them and neither Icy, nor Stormy protested? It’s good that they’re self-aware. It just seems a little OOC. And another power up in two consecutive episodes? Seriously? Will they ever get anything done on their own again?
- At least Sky is asking for advice. I am surprised that they are letting him interact with Flora yet again but I actually kinda like it.
- Why are they all gasping in surprise. They have been to the archive already when Bloom stole the Codex in season 2. It is the same room; they have seen it. Get over it already.
(- *sigh* I just lost my thoughts on half the episode. This season is not agreeing with me.)
- Flora was acting weird while Crystal was helping Helia. It was kind of like she was mad it was Crystal who could save him and not her and that is weird for Flora. I think she would have just been grateful he was saved.
- I suffer when the books suffer... and they did suffer a lot in this episode. Also, how come Stormy is creating life again? This still doesn’t make sense to me but compared to other things, it is more minor.
- I love Darcy’s hypnotic powers and the fact that she was using them on Stella. I think I might be starting to seriously consider this ship (as opposed to just entertaining the possibility of a cool dynamic between them). I mean, Stella looked like she’s seen the hottest new fashion collection and I know it was the magic but still. I kinda want a Darcy who is on her own (without her sisters) and manipulating/spelling Stella into being with her so that she could make place for herself in the Solarian court. And then she falls in love, of course.
- Just please tell me Sky won’t be without his memories for the rest of the season because that will just be too annoying. If they are going for drama, it would be good to at least make it relevant instead of shoving it in there by the ton for the sake of it.
5x04:
- Since when is the whole school so invested in Bloom? They weren’t when she was actually there and even though Winx are kind of legends now, you can bet your ass that there were still fairies that don’t like them. Not to mention that they shouldn’t all know what the hell happened when no one was there to witness it. Why would they let the whole school know if Erendor doesn’t even know yet?
- You are seriously telling me that Stella hadn’t considered being a fashion designer before? Really????? She literally spent her summer after season 1 as an intern for a fashion magazine and has been designing clothes since about the same time. This is just too dumb for words.
- Love how adorably awkward Timmy is. And I love that Tecna doesn’t mind at all. They are just too cute together!
- Ooh, tension between the Trix. That is interesting. Or at least would have been if it were focused more on the power balance in their own dynamic rather than on hate vs love for Tritannus. Why does everything have to be about guys?
- At least Flora seems to like Crystal now which is cool. But I cannot express how annoyed I am by the fact that the whole thing with the pendant is preventing him from getting his memories back. And the stupid thing is that this actually has potential. Losing the pendant could be the peak of Sky’s guilt towards Bloom for all the pain he’s caused her (about Diaspro and not only) and that could be very interesting to explore but this show will never go that deep. It’ll just remain as wasted potential. Just like everything else is.
- Okay, why does no one ever start with amnesia patients by asking them how they would like to go about things, how they feel? Stuff like that.
- Tecna really turned into a robot. Again, no fucking magical system to explain how you can turn a human into a robot. Plus, this could be interesting as well and also really deep but, again, this is Winx. It is not going to be deep. Even though they could have done so much with that premise and given Tecna a really cool arc.
- Ah, yes, I forgot to mention this while I was on the previous episode. I am done with Neptune being so dismissive and even aggressive against his other son. Like, maybe if you had tried some parenting, none of this would have come to pass. Just a thought. I am not saying that parents can prevent any bad choices their kids make but I am saying that he doesn’t look like he tried too hard to be a good dad. Nereus only turned out okay because they are twins and one of them has to be good while the other is evil. I am glad at least someone is trying to reach Tritannus even if he is beyond saving.
- Oh, off, Tritanus is not messing around. You know what? I actually like that. It was about time they made the villains as ruthless as they are trying to make them out to be. Even if I feel bad for his family because they just wanted to help him.
- Why do the selkies talk in the third person? They just went from useless to majorly annoying.
- Why don’t they just go get Faragonda? She may at least know what they are dealing with and possibly clue them in on how to unspell Tecna. They don’t have to reinvent the wheel, just find someone who knows how it was made.
- Great, they just set fire to the archive and nobody bothered to put it out. And they also released the elements in there. The question remains - will the archive survive their search for the Sirenix book? (What the hell were those other books, though? I would like to know where they came from.)
- Okay, but wasn’t the book Tecna opened cursed? What happened to that? And why did the spell on her phone only activate after she opened the book? This doesn’t make sense.
5x05:
- I am very confused about the order of episodes. “The Lilo” should be before “The Power of Harmonix” because they are still using their Believix powers but it makes more sense for the Harmonix episode to be after “The Book of Sirenix”. Anyway, I am watching “The Lilo” because Wikipedia says it’s the fifth episode even though it looks more like filler that wasn’t even meant to be in the season.
- At least we get to see Flora do something this time. She is the most neglected and it’s good to see her use magic for something else other than growing ivy. Seriously, Flo, chill with the ivy.
- “When I think of you, Helia, I believe in myself.” Because she can’t believe in herself if she doesn’t have a boyfriend. The intro is so totally right! What a way to show girl power!
- Why is the animation overly flowy? Is it because it is closer to 3D in order to tie better with the actual 3D later on? It kinda pokes out your eyes sometimes. Or at least mine.
- Someone remembered that the Whisperian Crystals were a thing. I love how they just made them sort of like GPS for magical objects even though they were only supposed to track the Dragon Fire. Proof of that is the fact that they never used them to track the Ring of Solaria even though they wanted it as well. So this is just a cop out to give them a chance to find the Lilo.
- Of course, the Lilo is in the possession of Mitzi’s little sister. Why wouldn’t it be?
- Gotta love how even the writers realized that it was too convenient for everything to be in Gardenia so they started making up excuses for it.
- Wait, how does Mitzi know who the Trix are? Have they... They haven’t met, right? What the hell? Also, Icy was literally standing in front of Macy but she couldn’t just grab the plant herself and had to order Darcy and Stormy to do it? Lazy much?
- Darcy’s powers are going back to their peak this season and I am so here for it.
- Flora legit just hit Icy with her shield. That was a good move and a little more aggressive than I would have expected from Flora but I’m not complaining.
- Great way to almost hit Macy, Stella.
- There was zero point to this episode. I guess they just had to do something to get them to a total of 26 episodes. And putting it right before the episode in which they get Harmonix is just ridiculous because they just powered up their Believix... right before they’ll stop using it.
5x06:
- They can’t even open the Book of Sirenix? Huh, that’s... kinda interesting actually.
- Oh, come on! Just when Bloom was making progress, Crystal brings in Diaspro. You have to love how the writers are implying that Crystal is no good by having her being friends with Diaspro. I thought we were over the Crystal drama but it looks like there will be more. And why is Bloom not losing her mind? Diaspro literally mind controlled Sky! Goddammit, it’s in situations like this I wish I could trust Erendor to do the best for his son! If Bloom could trust he wouldn’t side with Diaspro, she could have called him to let him make sure Diaspro stays away from Sky.
- Oh, they can lose their powers if they fail the quest? I like that! Extra stakes besides the Tritannus situation. This feels more intense now and I am here for it.
- I like the implication that there are other great fairies in the Magic Dimension and it’s not just Winx. Less so fond of the fact that the other fairies seem to be underhanded but I’ll take what I can get.
- Awwwww! That scene with Stella, Tecna and Musa was so precious! I love Stella’s joking and the fact that Tecna is so upset about what happened but she still believes their reassurances! And Musa saying she might start talking about her mother... *sob* This is so precious! They are opening up to each other even more than they have already! And about the tough topics. Ah, my heart!
- Okay, I kinda like the solidarity between Bloom and Layla. Also, the fact that Flora finally figured out what they are doing. Though, that’s kinda weird to me. Flora has been more wary of the reckless plans but I don’t think she would put her powers above her friends and possibly Layla’s whole realm if not the whole universe.
- Really wish it would have been someone else that had saved the horse and not Bloom.
- “Shadow hand”? Man, I was right. Darcy’s powers are peaking! Also, whatever spell Icy used on Winx to make it harder for them to move was super cool as well. I like it.
- They have to complete the Quest in one lunar cycle? That’s 28 days... On Earth. Maybe they should have specified which moon. Since Solaria has 2 suns there are probably millions of moons out there. Okay, that isn’t working out and I wish they had been more specific with it. This episode had some cool stuff about the Magic Dimension already and they could have done more. Anyway, one lunar cycle sounds like a short time but since it’s Winx, it is probably a long time.
- Oh, they just all got Harmonix without doing anything in order to earn it. Greaaaaat. And I have to say that the Harmonix design is so impractical. Why so many veils? They’re just gonna boggle them down. Of course, nothing ever gets wet on shows but seriously? If you’re fighting with someone, they can grab you by the veils or the veils can tangle around you and become the reason for your demise. This is stupid.
- Okay, so Tecna was being really insecure but they left her behind in the search of the Gem of Self-confidence? Like, you just threw away a golden opportunity. I am into the idea that they are going in the Magical Reality Chamber to still be at the place of the action so to speak and be able to help the rest better, though.
- Love the idea of the boat that can go to any water body. I would like one. Less so enthused about the contradiction in this very episode. Stella was complaining about wearing heels when she could have just changed with magic. The proof is right there since she changed hers, Bloom’s and Layla’s whole outfits just about 10 minutes later. This is ridiculous.
- Not @ the way the writers already threw Roy in despite the fact that it has been just five episodes since the beginning of the season. Also not @ the way he seems to be the stereotypical “girls need my protection” guy. Wish Layla would just keep not liking him. But they are probably trying to emulate what happened with Nabu at first. Ugh, I hate this so much I can’t even tell you.
- Oh, come on! They’ll be bonding with the selkies now? Let me guess, that was only written so that the selkies can get their powers back through the bonds, So Tritannus will enter the Infinite Ocean with the stolen selkie powers and Winx will enter it with help from their bonded selkies. This is so transparent, I can’t even. Also, totally needed their selkies to be matching the color of their Harmonix. I mean, how else are you gonna tell that they’re their bonded selkies? Not like they have personalities or are relevant in any way. Also, can another fairy bond with a selkie that has been “taken”? Like, there is a pixie for every fairy but the selkies are much less so... what the hell? This doesn’t make any sense.
- I hate what they did with the challenge for self-confidence. They could have done so much better. But first, Bloom’s test is all about Sky (which is dumb as fuck because it literally tells you their relationship is the biggest source of insecurity in her life) and Stella’s is about her not having confidence in her fashion taste? Really? Layla’s was most cutting as always but they didn’t even try to make it hard. It was so obvious that Nabu was an illusion because he was being cruel to her and the real Nabu would never. They should have gone for something else that would have really made her struggle with figuring out it is not real. Plus, by figuring out it is not real, she didn’t exactly confront her issue with confidence. And Bloom and Stella couldn’t even break out of it on their own and needed her help. How is that successfully passing the test?!?!?!?! And I was just starting to think that this could be getting better. It was I who should have known better.
5x07:
- Aww, I love how dedicated Stella is to knowing stuff about Solaria. She is going to be a precious queen. Also, her guardian of Sirenix is so beautiful.
- Ugh, the Trix are pulled apart again. I hate it. Darcy and Stormy do have a point. I just wish Icy would keep her head in the game. Also, do they sleep out in the open? In a swamp or whatever the hell that is?
- Wow, Sky that has no memory treats Bloom better than Sky that has memory of her. Interesting. Like, if he can calm her worries about Diaspro so easily when he doesn’t even remember how much he loves her, why didn’t he do that in the previous seasons? Honestly.
- Roy is annoying me just by cheering for Winx. This is not going well.
- Oh, damn, Flora got turned into stone. What did Tritannus do to that jellyfish? Turn it into Medusa (lmao, fun fact - jellyfish is called medusa [more like meduza but still] in Bulgarian)? Seriously. And why is Flora the one saving the selkies when she is the only one that isn’t bonded to any?
- Since the Trix also didn’t put any work into earning their powers, it is only fair that Winx get a free upgrade as well. I am just glad that at least the Harmonix spells look differently even though they function in the same generic way.
- Hey, Sky is actually starting to remember? Good. I was prepared to suffer through this amnesia arc up until 5x13 at least but now I have timid hope that it will not last that long. I guess the writers haven’t heard of muscle memory, however.
- How did the Gem of Confidence turn Flora back into herself when the jellyfish that turned her into stone had nothing to do with it? It was Tritannus’ doing and not even intentional. It shouldn’t have had petrifying powers in the first place. None of this makes any sense. Not to mention that the Gem somehow multiplied to six gems. I mean, really? Would’ve been much better if they could only choose to complete one box aka everyone else would lose their powers but then through their shared goal (aka Faragonda telling them that they have to be of one mind and heart) they could have all gotten the Sirenix. Just no other powers. That would have been way more interesting (obviously Layla would be the one whose box they’d complete and I don’t believe the Dragon Fire can be extinguished anyway so Bloom could even have a loophole out of that). And besides, they don’t use the old transformations anyway.
5x08:
- Stella is rocking that outfit. But why streaks? Stella, no!
- Tecna and Timmy are absolutely adorable with their mega nerdiness. I love it.
- Jeez, really? Sky is a better dancer with amnesia than Brandon is? I mean, this could have been plausible if they hadn’t established already in the previous episode that his muscle memory has fucked off into oblivion as well. Otherwise, yes. As royalty, he is probably better at dancing. Even though battle requires a lot of coordination as well. But nice of Kiko to try to help.
- Come on, Stella, you’re being insensitive. You would be “moping” too if Brandon had died. Please, don’t try to set Layla up with guys. Just give her some time to grieve!
- I don’t know what Stella expected. Of course, Layla is going to get offended by that. She doesn’t want company, she wants Nabu back.
- Oh, come on! Musa really got mad at Riven just because he liked the music another girl was playing? What, is he supposed to only listen to her music now? She isn’t even the vocalist of their band.
- They only have 10 days left to complete the missions? When did they manage to waste so much time? Like, they legit got the first thing done in one day. Where did the other go?
- Tressa has had so much growth since season 3. I love her. Really wish they’d let her be queen. But wtf, why can the king know what all of his subjects are doing? That is so invasive. Also, Layla should not be in the range of his powers. Man, the writers are really pulling some bullshit here.
- You’d think the selkies will learn that they can’t stop Tritanus and will try to not get in his way so that he wouldn’t get to steal their powers. But nope, they are both useless and stupid.
- Okay, Stella did mess up and she should have known why what she did was a bad idea but Layla giving her the silent treatment is not going to help either. I hope that the fact that Musa is dealing with the loss of her mother can help the two of them patch things up as well. Maybe there will be a lesson in this for both of them.
- Now it makes sense why Musa turned into an ocean type of monster. And this is a good opportunity for Stella and Layla to find their balance again and help save Musa.
- Stella’s attacks are still hurting Musa. And wouldn’t it make more sense for Layla to use her powers to stop her? She could make a net with morphix that will be both more reliable and less harmful for Musa. Seriously, why do they always make the dumbest choices possible?
- You know what would have been more interesting? If the healing of the bond could only work one way and the selkie didn’t get her powers back. They could have brought in Galatea to also bond with her in order to restore her powers later on so that they could enter the Infinite Ocean. That would have been more creative. But nah.
- Stella’s sudden understanding of Layla really came out of nowhere. And it felt like Layla only forgave her because she didn’t want to fight with her anymore, not because she was truly okay with what Stella did. This could have been done so much better.
- These Sirenix quests are so convenient. They all have to do with places the girls know and clues they have history with. It would have been much harder if they had to go to planets they don’t know how to navigate and a better way to do more worldbuilding.
- Bloom really can’t take 10 days away from the Sky mess? They can literally lose their powers forever which could mean handing Tritannus victory but she is more concerned with Sky’s memory that can possibly only get better in the next ten days while she focuses on the mission? Oh, come on!
- They are really trying to push hard the idea that Bloom and Sky are destined to be together. Also, now that they found the shell, can Sky’s memory block disappear? It would make sense. Please, just end this already.
5x09:
- Really? Bloom is sensing that something is wrong with Daphne but Marion isn’t? This could have been a cool moment to bring in the fact that their parents are back. Especially since Bloom isn’t going to do shit about it. I mean, how dense is she that she didn’t recognize the clouds of pollution hanging around Daphne in her dream? Could have at least tried to contact Daphne to make sure she was okay. Especially since she knows that Daphne talks to her through her dreams and that has been A Thing since season 1. I just... cannot.
- I... don’t even know what to say about Stella here. On the one hand I understand her frustration as she feels like no one supports her passion for fashion but on the other hand... Stella, no! Brandon was right that she needs to consider other people’s feelings sometimes, though, I’d say none of Winx exhibited particularly high levels of empathy here except maybe Flora.
- Oh, Tecna. On the one hand I want to say that there shouldn’t be a reason to feel nervous face to face with Timmy when they get along so well, but on the other, we have all experienced what she’s talking about. Texting can be so much easier sometimes even if it can also be dangerous because it lacks the context of body language.
- Seriously? We’re gonna make it through all the girls’ planets. I said it before and I’ll say it again, but this Sirenix Quest sure is damn convenient. At least it is kinda ironic that the Gem of Empathy is on Zenith since they seem to rely on technology more.... Man, that could have been an awesome opportunity to make Zenith more three dimensional by explaining that they develop so much technology so that they could make the lives of everyone easier when they have digital assist aka their focus on technology is driven by empathy. But again, that is just too deep for this show.
- Oh, come on! Stella really turned into a three-year-old? Why the hell would there be an age-changer spell in the pin? This doesn’t make sense. And again, a fucking wasted opportunity. Stella was running low on empathy here so including her in the search for the Gem of Empathy would have provided way more character development than this shit right here. I would have sent Stella, Tecna and Musa to get the Gem and Bloom, Flora and Layla to go look for Daphne. Or better yet, Stella and Tecna for the Gem, Musa and Layla after Tritannus and Bloom and Flora to check on Daphne.
- Is Layla ever going to use her Harmonix powers? Seriously, she has transformed how many times now and I can’t remember her using any of her new magic.
- Why is Layla now smiling at Roy even though she never transitioned from “annoyed” to “friendly teasing”? I hate this so much.
- It must be weird for Brandon to see his girlfriend as a three-year-old while he is still twenty. Like, that will make for a fun conversation once the spell wears off.
- It is so goddamn obvious that Tritannus has been there! Like, did the clouds of pollution not tip you off?????? Honestly, why don’t any of them have normal rationalizing abilities? It is a simple deduction! You don’t need the selkies to tell you! Besides, didn’t they already say that he crossed over to Zenith? This is like looking between a needle and a single straw of hay and having to point out which is the needle and they are failing!
- Shoot, I thought “where the one looks over the many” was supposed to be something of a mathematical riddle or something that would have to make Tecna focus on the whole rather than the details. The throne thing? Just... meh.
- I would have preferred it if their test of empathy involved something that was already inside them and came from themselves rather than them being placed under a spell by the Gem. It could have brought out their most unempathetic thoughts but I still think there was a better way to do this, and a more emotional one.
- Seriously?????? I mean, FOR REAL?!?!?!?!?! THAT is what they had to do to get the gem???????????????????????????????????????????????????? They didn’t even resolve their issues!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How did they prove they were worthy of having it. God, I hate this.
- How did the age-changer spell had any bearing on the plot or the characters? It literally didn’t do anything for Stella or Flora, Musa and Brandon for that matter. They had so many amazing opportunities in this episode and they were all wasted. I just... *frustrated sigh*
5x10:
- Is it just me or is the idea to put the Christmas filler episode right a couple of days before the deadline for the Sirenix Quest the worst idea ever? Well, not the worst because this show is just full of bad ideas but still somewhere up there with the big guys.
- I was gonna get incredibly angry if they’d made Christmas be a thing in the Magic Dimension but they got at least that right. And that way it’s cute that Bloom gets to introduce her friends to a new holiday. They all got so excited about the presents! Adorable! The only thing that would have made this better was if she’d invited Marion and Oritel to Mike and Vanessa’s as well to celebrate together.
- I was ready to hate this episode but it has actually caught my attention. Love how the Trix decided the magic of Christmas is literal magic and they want to steal it from Bloom. This is actually exactly what a funny filler episode should be like.
- Aww, a surprise Musa and Riven moment. That was adorable.
- Am I the only one who is getting Yu Gi Oh vibes from this monster? Okay, four monsters (Why four? That is so random. Three would have made more sense.). They just remind me too much of Blue Eyes White Dragon.
- You know what would be really cool? If Stella made a cage with mirrors at key places to reflect the light beam she shoots at the creatures so that it would keep running through the cage to stop them from reforming.
- Oh, wow. Faragonda showed up. I never thought that would happen. Not that she’s been much use. Like, you fought the Ancestral Witches! Surely, there has to be something you can do! Not to mention that how the hell did the Trix get magic of the darkest order? That’s just bullshit.
- You know what? I would be more worried about the fact that they may not be able to break the spell before they run out of water and food and other essentials. Like, the Christmas thing is upsetting but not a priority right now,
- Okay, the Trix are inside the ice dome but the ice dragons aren’t? That seems like a hole in their plan.
- The others got the spirit but they a little confused. Bloom doesn’t just miss Christmas but spending it with her family and they can’t give her that. Though, none of them didn’t even try to teleport. Depending on the way you do it, maybe they could have gotten out.
- This episode is kinda all over the place but at least it has that cool vibe from season 1 when they got to actually just chill around the school and do some fun stuff. Actually put time in just being friends. Oh, and the friendship charm bracelets are really cute! I love them.
- You know they don’t have what to put in an episode when they give the full transformations twice. Nice job, there.
- Making a hole in the dome does not sound like the best course of action because Winx could have just gotten out of there and forced the Trix to chase them. But no one thought of that.
- I feel second hand embarrassment on Icy’s behalf. If she ever gets to learn that she misunderstood about the magic of Christmas, that is. The way things are going, Bloom is gonna blast them out of the dimension without ever revealing that this was all for nothing.
- Well, Bloom could have just used her Dragon Fire to destroy the ice dragons the moment they appeared and none of that would have happened but why the hell would she do that? I have to say that I would have preferred it if Winx and the Specialists had gone to Gardenia instead of having Gardenia go to Alfea. Like, I get it that they wanted to make Christmas touch the Magic Dimension as well but Alfea has never celebrated a Zenithian-specific holiday for example or a Solarian one. It just makes the whole Winx universe a little too focused on Bloom again.
5x11:
- Omg, I am feeling so bad for Daphne. Hasn’t she suffered enough? Though, I have to say that I am at least glad Icy came up with a decent plan for counteraction this time even if it is cruel. At least it makes sense!
- Why the hell is the wind-rider competition held in Alfea? It should have been in Red Fountain but I guess the animators couldn’t be bothered to pull out their old animation of it and remember how to draw it.
- Bloom giving Sky a pep talk was kinda cute. I get why he would be nervous and it was cool that she did her best to help him. And that moment with throwing some harmless magic his way to show him his own reflexes was actually smart and hella cute as well. I just wish they wouldn’t have gone for the “he is the best Specialist ever to live” thing again but I’ll take it as his friends telling a white lie to soothe his anxiety.
- So the Trix are just being bullies for no reason at all. Also, they already used that invisibility spell when they messed with Tecna’s phone. Or at least it looked the same.
- Poor Kiko. Getting accused for something he didn’t do and then also being attacked by clones. But was it that only he could see them? Because otherwise, it should have tipped Bloom off that something’s wrong.
- They don’t need to remind us every time that there is no time to waste for the Sirenix Quest. We get it. And even if I had the episodes spaced out by weeks, I doubt I would forget that they have a time limit considering that this is not plot heavy and they have mentioned it, like, a million times already.
- Oh, they’re going to Linphea next. Look, even Tecna noticed that all the parts of the Quest have been on their home planets.
- Wow, Flora, you think the flower might be on your planet? Damn, girl, you’re such a genius. No one would have ever guessed. They have an ocean of flowers and she is still not sure? W.O.W.
- Love how it took Faragonda and Saladin a solid minute to interfere. Not like they were in a war or anything and should be 100% prepped to deal with crises. Why would you think that? And Griselda (and the other Alfea teachers) didn’t even get to do anything. Not to mention that Mirta has been studying at Alfea for a forth year now and she didn’t even try to fire at the beasts... You know, what could be considered an instinctive reaction.
- “Only one more keeper...”? Yeah, because there are only six-seven planets in the whole universe! (Didn’t he already get the powers of the selkie of Earth as well as from everyone’s home planets except for Bloom’s? Who’s gonna restore the Earth selkie’s powers... Wait, is it going to be Roxy? And does that mean we’re finally going to Domino this season?)
- I was gonna ask whatever Roy was gonna do without Layla being there but he isn’t there either. So why was he there the other times if not to drive the boat? They gave him one job to justify his presence and then they took that away as well.
- Funny how it is always the selkies of the girls that have gone on the Quest that appear and not any of the others. One of them (I am not even gonna bother to learn their names) said she could sense the presence of her fairy but still. Though, with their powers restored, I guess they could do that.
- Do I remember wrong or are Flora and her selkie the only ones that actually hugged? Cause that was kinda cute.
- Okay, Sky’s plan was good but did Bloom really need him to pull her out of the way? I am pretty sure she could have done that on her own since it was obvious what the plan was.
- If I were Stella, I’d be worried that a plant might eat me too. Having courage doesn’t mean that you can’t be afraid. It means that you find it in yourself to go on despite the fear. So I’d say Stella is courageous enough.
- Okay, but this plant looks like it was touched by Tritannus’ pollution and so did all the rest of the places from the Quest (except for Melody). So that means that what is happening wouldn’t have happened if not for him aka they aren’t actually completing the Quest because they are fighting Tritannus’ influence on the environment, not performing the tasks from the Quest.
- Good! Tecna and Layla are actually being strategical about this even though all Bloom wants is to hang out with the boyfriend. I wouldn’t mind if she didn’t just get targeted. But why the hell would she care about her safety - or Sky’s for that matter - when they can go on a romantic walk instead?
- Really? They need a translator? Flora has communicated with plants numerous times before. She should be able to understand what the Flower of the Depths is saying to them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dear god, the writers are really trying to be as stupid as possible.
- Why didn’t Bloom try to transform before jumping against the Trix? Or at least shoot some magic at them? Once again, how are they still alive?
- Darcy’s powers are awesome and she’s using them well. I love how she pushed Musa in her own trap. But damn, it was harsh of Musa to try to cause the rocks to crush Darcy. I thought the Trix were supposed to be the cruel ones.
- Wow, I thought Icy would have at least a couple broken bones after Layla smashed her in the rock like that but nope. She’s fine.
- Okay, I actually think that Sky and Bloom are cute in this episode, what the hell? I like the fact that they decided to stop trying to get the past back to him. That may even actually help him remember when he’s not stressing and straining to do it. I thought that Bloom meant one of the memories she wants to keep was that of the shell they found, though. Wasn’t that soulmate special or something?
5x12:
- Icy is really not paying attention, huh? I mean, Tritannus saying that he would give her one more chance somehow didn’t sound too reassuring to me. He gave the Trix their powers so he could probably take them away any time he wants and then destroy them. Which sounded exactly like what he was planning to do before Icy convinced him to give her one more chance.
- Well, they noticed the pattern of the Quest running through all their home planets. They could have tried looking for the yellow reef on Domino before asking the guardian of the Sirenix box. Just to do something on their own, you know.
- Who let Bloom go in that dress? Didn’t Tecna say Stella was there as well? How could she let Bloom even put that thing on, let alone wear it to the Domino renewal celebration. Also, why the hell is that happening only now? It has been a season and a half since Domino was restored. I thought this would be the discussion of Tritannus.
- Love how they didn’t even redo the footage from SotLK and just slapped the different art style right in the middle of the one from season 5. Lazy as lazy gets.
- Um, wasn’t the plan to capture Bloom? And if they changed it to getting Marion and Oritel, why didn’t they try to do that when Bloom wasn’t there? They couldn’t get her but they will somehow get her parents who literally defeated the Ancestral Witches while Bloom and two or three of her friends plus Sky are also there? How does that make sense?
- Oh, come on! The dresses looked much better without the flowers. Also, you’re telling me that Stella made them fit the same theme as Bloom’s but she didn’t have anything to do with Bloom’s dress? This is just... ridiculous. Also, how do flowers relate to Domino? Sparks or even gems would have made better sense. A fire pattern even.
- Marion and Oritel are giving very different vibes from the ones in Magical Adventure and even SotLK (even though they had like five lines each in that one).
- Did Bloom suddenly forget that Sky does not remember how he saved the Sword? And she left him alone even though he doesn’t have his memories? Also, why do none of their parents know about that? And up until this point, there were always three of them going on the Quest. But now that Bloom is actually needed somewhere else she is going even though she could have left it to Stella, Layla and Flora? Come on!
- Didn’t the pendant sink in the ocean on Earth? Where are the selkies now? And how come Flora’s selkie decided that she will know who the pendant belongs to? You know, out of the infinite number of people in the whole universe. The fact that she just so happens to actually know is yet another too convenient convenience but still.
- The mimicry fish are adorable and I love them.
- Wait, can any selkie open any portal? I thought they could only open the portals that they were guarding. But then Winx shouldn’t have been able to pass from Domino back to wherever Tritannus attacked - Andros maybe?
- Love how Marion instantly jumped away when the Trix attacked despite how much her outfit must weigh. And you’re telling me that Oritel is the fighter between the two of them? Yeah, right. Just please, let her use her magic to stop the Trix. We know she has it! Don’t make her look helpless because she is far from it.
- Well, of course, even the oceans of Domino are the best and have the rarest fish even though it is the planet of the Dragon Fire and Andros is the center of all oceans. Makes perfect sense.
- Okay, Marion and Oritel are definitely giving waaaay different vibes from the ones in the movies but I have to say that I kinda like how fierce they are. Not @ Oritel’s “Still have it in you?” because duh, she obviously does and even more so than you do, Oritel, but other than that I love how smoothly they just switch from celebration to a fight that is potentially for their lives. Also, I like that Sky gets to fight with them... Or at least he was supposed to.
- Yes, the one time Bloom is there, the others are completely useless. Also, that thing is not a coral. Wasn’t the Gem supposed to be in the jaws of the coral, not whatever the hell this fish is. And how is it in its mouth? How does it not ingest it when it eats? This doesn’t make sense.
- Love whatever Marion did there with shooting magic out of her sword. However, I don’t like the fact that the writers have forgotten she has magic and is not defenseless without a sword. And how did that trick even work? She could have just turned around and seen that it wasn’t the real Oritel. Not to mention that if Oritel knows the Trix are descendants of the Ancestral Witches, Marion does too aka she should have known that one of them has illusion powers. Given the fact that they fought a whole war against Lysslis, I am pretty sure she has faced similar tricks before and should have known better.
- Please, tell me the creature was supposed to vanish and it wasn’t Bloom that vaporized it from inside. Also, I so totally knew the last gem would be green. It made perfect sense.
- At least they remembered that Oritel’s sword is supposed to be special because it has Dragon Fire in it.
- Bloom and Sky saving her parents “together” makes no sense because Sky doesn’t have magic. So it wasn’t him that helped her save them but the sword.
- Their declarations of love were kinda undermined by him remembering and in such stupid way. Like, all the progress he made in restoring their relationship and even remembering a little wouldn’t have mattered if he hadn’t gotten the pendant back. Aka his blockage wasn’t actually going away. It was still there which means that his emotions were not getting worked out.
- I know Marion and Oritel will not go help save Daphne even though that would be the only logical thing and I am so fucking mad about it, you don’t even know.
5x13:
- Oh, god! They changed even the intro and the 3D animation is as ugly as I remember it to be. Love how they also spoil the fact that the girls will get Sirenix in this episode. Not that the title of the episode doesn’t.
- I have beef with this recap. That fish that had the Gem of Courage was so totally not a shark. It just wasn’t. I’m no shark expert but that was definitely not a shark. It looks like some fish you can find in the depths (I don’t remember their name) but it sure as hell ain’t a fucking shark.
- What training? They need to go get Daphne! Also, they handled Believix just fine. If Alfea had given them proper education, they should be able to control any transformation. Like, those should operate according to some goddamn logic.
- If Daphne hadn’t already told him, then why did she do it now? Man, he should have just made her talk before he told the Trix to leave Domino. Now that they were no longer there, Daphne didn’t have any reason to talk. She must have known that Bloom would find their parents so Tritannus lost his leverage. This is so nonsensical.
- What the hell does it mean that they have to look inside themselves? How is that gonna lead them to lake Roccaluche? The only one connected to it is Bloom because Daphne is her sister. This is ridiculous.
- How big is that lake and why does it look exactly the same way that the sea does? There is a difference between sweet water bodies and salt water bodies and the life inside them, you know, writers.
- Why would there be a protection system to guard the source of a whole ass goddamn transformation? It makes much more sense that anyone could just walk in and destroy it in 0.3 seconds.
- They just had to say that they will keep exhibiting the three virtues the Gems represented in order to get the location of the source of Sirenix? Man, really? Ugh, that is just so... ridiculously frustrating.
- For people who can lose their magic the same day, they sure don’t seem to be worried. Lounging and all.
- They know Tritannus was there. Obviously that is the explanation as to why the selkies did not find them.
- Yes, they totally look like they’ve “got this”.
- I actually liked the fact that Bloom had to give up finding out where Daphne is in order to save the lake. Seeing all the panicked animals rush around really drives home what is going on because they will all die if the lake dries completely.
- Oh, I am totally going to cry over Daphne’s anguish here. This looks so brutal. But here’s a thought for you. The whole power of Sirenix was put under a curse, right? Then why didn’t the Trix get affected by it? And if the Sirenix power is removed from Daphne, shouldn’t the curse disappear as well?
- Love how they forgot about the part where Sirenix was cursed even before Tritannus messed with the source.
- I hate the Sirenix transformation. It is the ugliest one to me and why did they have to go and give them streaks? The 3D look was bad enough already. Only the Trix’ Sirenix design is worse than this. (No, actually whatever the hell is happening to the Trix in the end of season 7 is the worst design idea they have ever had but I haven’t watched that.)
- So they didn’t need the selkies to enter the Infinite Ocean? Then how come that is what Tritannus needed? What the hell is wrong with the logistics of this whole thing?
- Where did all these minions come from? Did whatever he did to the... stone? thingy poison the nearby water and turn all creatures into his minions? Didn’t that work only on merfolk? If so, the Infinite Ocean seems overpopulated.
- They totally could have had Marion and Oritel in this but once Tritannus took Daphne into the Infinite Ocean, they would have needed to let Winx handle the rescue mission because the two of them wouldn’t be able to enter the Infinite Ocean. And boom, problem solved. They don’t have to drag Oritel and Marion through every episode while they still could have shown that they cared. Idk what was so complicated about that.
Part 2 can be found here.
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ssvgawara · 4 years ago
Text
Haikyuu characters as things said in the hhcu
a/n: this is pure humor and just something fun, the hhcu is wild and says stupid shit more than once a day so i complied a ridiculously long list of quotes and put them together in this list to share with yall so please enjoy, read more because again this is so long also pt 2. some of these r pretty nsfw so uh yeah <3
Oikawa: When he gives up his torso 😍 
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Nishinoya: Fisherman daddy
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Bokuto: I trust no condiments
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Osamu: YELLOW BAD OIKAWA IS NOT ALLOWED IN MY KITCHEN
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Tendou: Give ass in shiratorizawa?
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Atsumu: Garlic air freshener
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Nishinoya talking about his sex life: ITS THE GOOD OL FASHIONED POW POW GRUNT GRUNT WINDOW WASHER ULTIMATE FRISBEE DICK CONNECTOR 
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ��� ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Hinata: thank you!! also my oven melted??? and caught on fire 😰 
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Yaku probably thinking abt kuroo while saying this: not gonna front im terrified of the live action grinch and if i ever see him its on sight
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Kageyama: Except that one mustard faze I had
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Lev after yaku kicks him yet again: NO INCH ACTIVE INCH VERY ACTIVE
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Suga after Kiyoko holds his hands: premarital eye contact is already a sin
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Iwaizumi realizing Oikawa probably wouldn’t know the difference between hawaiian rolls and milk bread: when he says hit it till it breaks, he means the packaging of hawaiin rolls
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All of Seijoh to Oikawa: You know whats really sexy? Self care.
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Hoshihumi: like a three year old. still baby but also evil at times🤡 
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Oikawa right before his death: "MORNING HAJI!~" slaps tiddie
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
 Anyone falling on love with haikyuu boys: hey a good reverse harem never hurt anyone
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Idk who says it but terushima would do this: places his hand to my heart but then hes like heh heh boob squishy
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Tendou: centrepical force saved my bag of chocolate!!
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Lev thinking it was a literary masterpiece: *reads about a fourth of the bee movie*
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Hinata making fun of Kageyama: milk is better than the feeling of the ball touching your fingertips during a perfect set
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Hinata and Kageyama failing tests: thats just the dumbass in me babey!!!
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Atsumu simply trying to annoy Osamu: Are y’all meaning to tell me you DON’T take your raw chicken on walks through the city?
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Yahaba: PUSSY ALWAYS LEAVES
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Mattsun just to annoy everyone: yall ever think about how in the 50s and 60s they just put raw hotdogs or shrimp into jello and ate that shit and enjoyed it???
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Suga: i am now crying and my boyfriend is concerned and i can’t tell him that I’ve lost my husband and children
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Kenma; Smh my head
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Bokuto: Sorry not all of us can have double decker extra stuffed bottoms up extra large super sized t n a like me🥰🥰💅💅
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Everyone to bokuto: titty enthusiast ✨✨
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Me to kuroo: sorry babe youre a scorpio you dont have any rights anymore
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Tendou: i accidentally lit a  baby on fire
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Atsumu: This feels real human centipede
Bokuto: theyre not ass to mouth
Atsumu: Close enough
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Bokuto when a minor inconvience happens: Why are we still here? Just to suffer? Every day, I wake up....
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Sakusa: Remove your lips from my penis
Atsumu: I use a gluestick as chapstick i cant
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Goshiki: Arson or boot in my book, set fire to something live a little
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Tsukishima: I don’t like recieving pain. It hurts
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Kenma annoyed w kuroo: Put your dick in the fucking catfish’s pussy then
Kuroo being annoying: How deep is catfish pussy
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Makki to Mattsun: Ayo babe what if we fucked on the catfish tank
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Kiyoko tiredly, to Tanaka: I’m not putting salt and pepper on my pussy lips
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Saeko: I’ve got that Deep dish, super soaker, wet, succulent dripping honey suckle like sweet marinated mooseknuckle, extra thick, slip n slide, water park, waterbender, extra ribbed, the seven seas, gorilla grip, flex tape, primordial soup Dwayne the Rock Johnson, Cardi B, Megan Thee Stallion pussy
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Atsumu not really knowing what cooch means: I got the body builder cooch
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Oikawa after not sleeping to train, extremely sleep deprived: youre got unending
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Goshiki; Commit arson
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Akaashi: I leave for 10 minutes and Bokuto is 240v (mouth edition) fuckmaster pro 4000 with semen drip collection tray, automated self-lubricating 6 speed pulsating pussy and built in Polycrystalline floatable silicon
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Oikawa; I’m coming to murk your ass xoxo
Iwa: I will literally shiv you bitch
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Kindaichi: ✨ bob duncan exterminates you asmr✨
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Makki: I’ll try to find my favorite about Jacob sartorius vampire babies with Hillary Clinton
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Kenma after playing some obscure video game: also i can’t sleep😔 too busy thinking about human sized bats
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
ME fuck yall im carpetting my bathroom: you already put rugs in the bathroom might as well carpet that bitch
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Kuroo talking abt something sciency idk: LIKE A BODY WIG
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Seijoh when iwa throws balls at oikawa: spousal abuse right in front of my salad
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Hinata making up some new stupid song: Ants on a log ants on a log
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Atsumu to piss off Osamu once more: world f amous allegra chicken
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Semi: Gay little Ushijima’s left hand
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Bokuto: Are you disagreeing with the fact that I am thicc as phuck
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Kiyoko: Guys is it uh... is it possible to sprain a titty cause.... Uh....
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Terushima: He laughed at the end of his own joke what a fuckin chad
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Bokuto: IS THAT THE DOG FROM ZOOTOOIA
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Kageyama: milk is kinda like organ paint huh
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Nishinoya: i don’t think socks taste good
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Tendou: out of your mummy, into my tummy
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Hinata; shout out to me who thought chickens had four legs until last summer
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Oikawa Hanger: I WANNA HANG MY CLOTHES ON HIM 
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Kenma: What a little pissbaby
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Yamaguchi: i am literally so curious about what it's like to kiss a boy that it's almost killing me
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Daichi about Suga: he may be cute, but istg there’s some kind of raging devil trapped in him
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Saeko: fuck society my titties are out
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Hinata after getting lecture by everyone for sneaking into the training camp: GOOD NEWS MY DAD IS NOT GOING TO PUT ME IN THE OVEN
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Just me thinking abt any first years: children. toddlers. Tikes.
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Me waiting for the fever: When is malaria?
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Uhhhhh probably tendou his vibes: Ill electrocute his cock
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Akaashi just go w it probably about bokuto: Why is he shoving cheese up the pussy
┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉ ┉
Osamu tiredly: Ooey gooey cheesy chicken vagaina
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Nishinoya trying to catch a very large fish: Dom the Crab
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Bonus crabagraph: The crabs death reverberated and struck fear into the hearts of all crabs in existence because of this one 60+ year old mans volatile universe-crunching swing. Dude defied the laws of gravity by simply getting pinched by the crab. Man just reinvented the laws of physics and all of science due to the sheer force of will and untapped wellsprings if potential unleashed by the crab. If aliens show up it’s because the supersonic radio waves released by the banging of the crab against the cabinet are the first ever created in the universe. Man could cause a ripple in space-time with his crab launching abilities. Guy probably opened a gateway into another universe when he launched the crab. You see how the cabinet door opened and stayed open? It’s because this elder tore a hole through the fabric of reality to the Other Side simply because he experienced a minor bit of pain. The way he released a defeated roar of agony. The ancient gods awoke from their deep slumber and this old man single-handedly revived all his ancestors. New wars are about to start because of the way this man broke the barriers containing this reality into one fixed area. This universe is now expanding at such a rapid rate the the geosphere will now be reshaped. This man probably unknowingly blasted a hole in the other side of the planet because the shockwaves of the aggressive rippling effect of this poor crustacean slamming at lightning speed into a small wooden frame. The crabs insides were probably fused into the shell because this man’s angry, rage filled, pain filled battering ram of an arm throwing him through every known dimension and re-arriving in this one at the mere moment to experience the most pain a crab ever has or will in the rest of the existence of crabs. This elderly man probably has phased through and broken every human limiter known to man just because he got a minor pinch by a crab. He probably is bio-medically fused with crab DNA at this point. A legend.
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shutupandshipit · 4 years ago
Text
Little Life - Ch.8
Summary:  A baby could ruin his career before it had even started. If anyone found out, he would be kicked out of the Hero Course at the very least and UA at the very worst. Even then, how was he supposed to care for a baby once it arrived? He was a fucking seventeen-year-old boy, not a twenty-nine-year-old omega with their shit at least somewhat together.
…..
Or where Katsuki get pregnant, but is determined to make it to graduation. No matter what it takes.
Pairing: Bakudeku
Rating: T (just for language mostly)
Chapter: 8/16
Previous <- Chapter 7
Chapter 9 -> Next
Master Post
Chapter 8: 6 Months
Just like that, Katsuki had made it through two-thirds of his pregnancy. He frowned down at his phone completely disbelieving. The past six months had gone by in the blink of an eye, even with how long the First Trimester had seemingly lasted. This trimester was easier, far easier with how minimal his symptoms had actually been.
'Three months. I have three months left until I meet you, you little monster,' Katsuki thought idly. Warmth bloomed in his chest, and embedded itself in his cheeks.
"Yo, Kacchan, what's that look on your face? You almost look happy!" Kaminari shouted right in his ear, clapping him on the shoulder as he went back to shoving his things back in his bag.
"Get the fuck off me, Dunce Face," Katsuki snarled viciously, snapping his teeth at the blond and slinging his bag over his shoulder. Without looking, Izuku's hand familiarly slipped into his even as Izuku continued talking to his own group.
Kaminari's eyes dropped to their intertwined fingers, and Katsuki stared pointedly until he glanced back up with a wider smile. "No, like, seriously, man. It's like you're glowing all the time now. So fucking weird. It kind of scares me!"
Katsuki's face tightened dangerously as he smiled back. "Are you truing to have a funeral, Dunce Face? I can arrange that for you right now, if you want."
A hand came down over Kaminari's mouth, and Kirishima smiled widely as he steered him away. "Your mouth is getting away from you again, Denks. Where's Shinsou? Maybe you can run it at him for a bit." Before they could leave to find the aforementioned hero in training, Mina grabbed them by the back of their school uniforms.
"Don't go anywhere! We're going back to my room, remember?" she asked brightly.
"I'm not," Katsuki said automatically, "I've got shit to do." That being a movie and shamelessly cuddling Izuku in his nest. Well, really, they were going to go to the new hero expo that Izuku was all but salivating to go and then he was going to cuddle the alpha shamelessly. He wasn't in the mood to be dragged around for hours, but he was in the mood to spend time with Izuku.
"Mido! Come on!" Mina whined, and Izuku turned with raised eyebrows, "You know how long I've been planning this! I know you're what he's talking about!"
"You don't know shit, Raccoon Eyes," Katsuki spit back, gripping Izuku's hand more tightly.
Izuku responded, fingers flexing in his. He smiled. "It's okay. You should spend time with them. I know you don't like how crowded expos can get. Iida and Ochako said they wanted to go, so I won't be alone. We can still get together afterward, and that way I can bring back something we haven't watched six times."
Katsuki grimaced, but after a moment, sighed. "Fine."
Mina and the other idiots whooped. They danced around as Izuku pulled Katsuki close with a hand on the back of his neck.
He scented Katsuki liberally in the view of everyone and their mother, rubbing their necks together. Katsuki's omega purred contentedly, and when Izuku pulled back to kiss him, he took the chance to make it a little less chaste than Izuku had intended.
They pulled away with a dopey smile on Izuku's lips. He giggled. "Have fun. I'll see you later."
"Yeah, you too," Katsuki murmured before Mina forcefully pulled him away.
"That's still so weird to me," Kaminari complained, "Like, not only are you gay, but the blatant PDA? I thought for sure you were just asexual."
'Maybe. I'm really just Deku-sexual.' He decided to keep that to himself.
"Okay," Kirishima sang, "That's about enough out of you." He turned Kaminari away with an arm slung over his shoulders before Katsuki could shut him up for good.
"Naw, man," Sero butted in, blanketing Kirishima's arm with his own, "All their fights were totally charged with sexual tension."
Mina laughed, pulling Katsuki along by his hand. "You two are really trying to get hurt today, aren't you?"
.....
A beer sat in front of Katsuki like it had been since he'd been forcefully pushed down at Mina's desk, sweating profusely in the rising temperature of the room. It had probably gone lukewarm an hour ago, but he wouldn't know. He'd been hanging onto the tea Kirishima had discreetly passed him, but he'd started to use the water from the bottle to draw on the desktop.
Around him, the group was loudly arguing about who would win in a fight: pre-retirement All Might vs. the original Hulk. When Sero had drunkenly started shouting about Captain America, Katsuki had almost exclusively tuned them out and just let his omega marinate in the feeling of community.
If he hadn't been pregnant, Katsuki would have enjoyed a beer or two and enthusiastically joined in the discussion, but as it were, he was. And the smell of booze and the swirling mix of his friends' scents were starting to make him a little sick.
Only Kirishima's grounding hand on his knee kept him from bolting. Thankfully, he'd also been fielding any attempts to draw him into conversation.
He didn't see Mina approaching when she flopped into his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Kacchan, are you having fun?" she sang, and he contemplated shoving her off him. Weirdly though, he could tell that she wasn't even tipsy. He actually couldn't remember seeing her take a drink since the party had started, and the realization disquieted him.
"Not nearly," he told her truthfully as Kirishima tried unsuccessfully to pries her off.
She pouted. "Aw, you don't like us anymore now that you've got a boyfriend to entertain you."
"Whoever said I like any of you to begin with?" he sneered.
"Drink with us!" she whined, "You haven't even touched your first beer!"
"Don't want to," he grumbled and went back to his drawing. He was trying to figure out what he wanted to put on the onsie he and Ochako had been making. They'd researched how to make reusable cloth diapers, and he'd have to think of a design for that as well.
Katsuki stiffened when her sticky lips pressed to his ear and whispered, "I know your secret, Katsuki. I know why you're not drinking."
He had shoved her from his lap and was out of his seat before he'd even made the conscious decision to get up. His omega snarled a warning in his chest as she blinked owlishly up at him from the floor. "I'm leaving," he snarled, and he was out the door.
The silence of the room broke as Sero slurred in annoyance, "Mina, what did you say to him?"
"Nothing, nothing, I'll go talk to him," she said placating.
He was already stomping down the stairs when he heard her door slam and her footsteps run to catch up. He sped up, almost sprinting down the stairs. He really hated this whole thing where he had to go all the way to the first floor to get to the boys' staircase. While he understood its necessity with shits like Mineta in the dorm, it was making it extremely difficult to run from his quick-footed friend.
She caught up with him on the third floor of the boys' side. "Katsuki, slow down! Let me explain!" she panted as she sprinted up the stairs behind him.
"Fuck off, Mina!" he roared back, and then he tripped, barely catching himself from cracking his knees on the landing to his floor.
She took her chance, tackling him to the ground and pinning him there.
He struggled and snapped at her, but Mina was incredibly strong for her size. Unless he wanted to hurt her by flinging her down the stairs, he wasn't getting away so easily. "Get the fuck off me!"
"No! Let me explain!" she shouted back.
"No! You think I want to talk to you after that?"
"No, but I want to talk to you about it."
"How did you even find out?" Against his will, his rage was leaking away to be replaced by pure exhaustion. How many people knew? Had he really been that careless? If that was the case, did Izuku know and just decided not to say anything? That wasn't like him.
Mina sighed, grip loosening. He took the chance to buck her off, and she careened over him. They lay panting for several moments before she decided to say anything. "I followed you the day you found out. I was worried because you were acting so weird. I saw you throw the bag away. I saw what was in it."
There was a resounding record scratch in Katsuki's head, and it took him a moment to understand. "You followed me?" he shouted, twisting onto his forearms to glare at her, "You went through my trash?"
"I was worried!" she whined back, holding herself up on her arms to look at him.
"Honestly, fuck you. Who does that?" Pushing to his feet, he strode passed her as she scrambled up behind him. "Fuck off, Mina, I don't want anything to do with you right now," he snarled even as she shouldered into his room passed the door he tried to slam on her.
"No, we're going to talk about this," she said adamantly, standing by his door instead of following him deeper into his room.
'Good,' he raged silently, 'Or I'd blow you up in an instant.'
They glared at each other, him safely in the mess of his own design of clothes and cloth and thread, and her by the door. He snarled a warning when she took a step forward.
She huffed. "Look, I wasn't completely sure until just now. You never refuse so much to drink with us. You always have at least one drink even if you bitch about it the whole time. I wasn't going to say anything."
"Then why did you?"
"Because Eiji clearly knows, and for whatever reason, no one else does. Well," her eyes took in the mess, the pervasiveness of Izuku's, Kirishima's and Ochako's scents, "him and Chako apparently. Mido clearly doesn't know or he would be acting way more possessive. Why?"
Katsuki remained silent. He wasn't about to so liberally give up his secrets to someone who had ambushed him in a place where he should have been safe.
"Is it even his?"
A growl ripped from his throat before he could stop it. Did she really think that lowly of him?"
"Then what? You're just planning on giving birth and giving it up for adoption? Do you even want it? You couldn't stomach an abortion, so you're going to do all of this for nothing?" she asked meanly, lips curled.
He flung his arms out to encompass the room, the fabric and the half constructed onsie and the smell of his room. "Them, Mina, they are a them not an it. You really must think so highly of me to think I'd go through all of this and not want to keep them. Go fuck yourself with any uncomfortable device of your choice. As long as it fucking hurts."
In an instant, her face smoothed out and she grinned at him. The sudden shift in mood had him suddenly off balance. "Just checking. Didn't think I could forgive you otherwise."
"Fuck. You. Mina." He sat heavily in his desk chair, carding a hand through his hair. How many people knew? Who was going to out him? What was he going to do if they did? It's not like he could just kill everyone. That wouldn't solve as many problems as he wished it would.
'Hurry up and get here, little monster. My heart can't take much more of this.'
Mina dropped to the ground, crisscrossing her legs and seemingly getting comfortable.
He had a very sudden and violent image of ripping out her throat with his teeth. Now there was an idea.
"So, you're what? Three months out? Two? You're so close!"
"Three," Katsuki grumbled, flopping his head back and closing his eyes, "Now get out."
"What? No! I want to have girl talk."
"I'm still a fucking man, Mina, there is no 'girl talk' that we can share. I just happen to also be able to have pups. Our pregnancies wouldn't even be the same. Make friends with someone else."
Mina was quiet for a moment. "Can I at least join in the next time you and Chako get together for crafts? I don't know how to sew, but I can learn! And I'm great with designs!" Her voice was small and coaxing.
That was something he could work with. "Fine."
"Yes!" she squealed before returning to normal speaking volumes, "I haven't told anyone, you know, and I won't unless you want me to."
"Well, that's fucking obvious or no one would shut their fucking mouths or leave me alone. Let's keep it that way."
"Sure thing. We should get back to the party though. The natives are probably getting restless, and I doubt you want them to see this."
Katsuki lifted his head. "You go. I wasn't in the mood before so what makes you think I'm any more in the mood now?"
"You know they'll ask more questions for days if I come back alone. Just come back with me. Mido will come back soon, and then you can go off and do whatever it is you two normally do."
"I hate it when you make sense," he grumbled, but stood. He took a moment to hide away his projects before following her out.
When they got to the stairs, she pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. "Thanks for trusting me."
"I don't really have a fucking choice in the matter."
"Nope," she chirped, and took the lead.
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notbecauseofvictories · 5 years ago
Note
Hi Sarah! You seem to be quite enthusiastic and well informed about cooking, and I was wondering if you had any tips for students at uni? I feel it's so difficult to keep a healthy diet and cook for yourself on a low budget. Do you have any good recipes you could share? Or ideas? Thank you so much if you are able to answer, no worries if you don't feel like it.
This is...kind of a difficult question to answer, given that I approach cooking as a decadent, pleasurable thing, rather than something functional. (Some people shop online when they want to splurge. I make 48 coconut macaroons hand-shaped and dipped in chocolate, and a parmesan-garlic cream sauce to drizzle over my steamed brussel sprouts.) If all I need to do is consume calories, I’m much more likely to cut corners---seriously, store-bought sauces, simmer pastes, and salad dressings are a godsend---or buy something convenient. I could probably survive on deli sandwiches, if I really put my mind to it.
However, I do want to suggest a couple tips I think are helpful:
1) Know what you like, know what you need.
What it says, because food is always a balancing act between getting the kinds of nutrients your physical, calorie-consuming body needs and the sugar/salt/fats you want. Personally, I will eat literally anything if there’s bread or cheese or both involved. (This is not a joke---I have eaten a lot of creamed spinach and deli sandwiches.) However, having discussed my diet with healthcare professionals, I know what I need is proteins and vitamin d. So when I’m preparing my schedule for the week, I force myself to think about both: what will I eat, what should I eat, what can I make that satisfies the difference? And then, what’s my timing? (i.e., do I need to stay late at work? do I have other plans that night?) 
Like everything with my life, I review it vaguely sometime Monday and plan out my week. Though I do know enough about myself to build in some flexibility, because sometimes a bitch is walking home desperate for a burger, and shouldn’t have to apologize.
2) Google with abandon.
I do not have any private store of family recipes. My mother was a functional cook, and my grandmothers were either of the “hors d'oeuvres and martinis” generation or the “jello(tm) with colorful sprinkles is an actual dessert” generation. (The difference there, by the way, is class. But that’s a whole other tumblr post.) The point is that at the end of the day, there’s no secret treasure trove of recipes for me to delve into.
Which means I google everything. Every recipe I post here, every time I have spare ingredients I’m looking to get rid of. “Unsweetened chocolate recipes” is one of my latest searches, because I accidentally bought 4 oz of it instead of semi-sweet and don’t know what to do. (I’ll probably end up make brownies.) I have also googled in the last few months:
Reduced milk recipe
Quinoa recipe
Bean recipe
Dark corn syrup recipe
Pie crust recipe 
Apple pie recipe
Scallion pancake recipe
The point is, just because you don’t know what to do shouldn’t keep you from making good food! Personally, I love Epicurious, and always check their suggestions first, but the internet is wide and deep and full of people who will suggest cooking times, oven temperature, and spices you can add to stuff to make it taste good. Don’t be afraid to scroll through 4 different recipes on different domains, even if it’s the same dish; or to add “simple” to you search terms. You have more cookery knowledge at your clumsy fingertips than anyone before us ever has---use it.
3) Store it, freeze it, stick it in a tupperware.
As someone who’s now been cooking for herself for at least 5 years, I am here to tell you that there’s no “cooking for one.” Cooking for one is a lie. What you do is cook for 3-4 people, and then freeze or refrigerate the leftovers. So it’s important to consider how well your various ingredients freeze and how you’ll reheat them when the time comes.
Meat and seafood freeze well when you get them from the grocery store! Unfortunately, if you cook something or marinate it, and leave it to sit in the fridge, it will get very tough or break down entirely. (This is especially true if you use a particularly acidic marinade.) Unless you get them already frozen, fruits and vegetables do not freeze well at all—water expands as it freezes, and your fresh fruit & veg are so watery that the ice completely ruins the cellulose structure and defrosting will make them mushy. If you have leftover cooked vegetables, those should be used in scrambled eggs or eaten with a sauce within the week. Cream-based soups and sauces freeze pretty nicely, you just have to be careful not to leave them long enough to get freezer burn. Freezing bread arrests the yeast and mold processes, so if you’re looking to keep your loaf from turning, stick it in the freezer in an airtight bag.
(I haven’t had a microwave in two years, so most of what I make is the kind of stuff I can reheat on the stove—or eat cold!)
Also, most food isn’t ruined by temperature---you can leave a lot of stuff out on the counter after cooking without fear of bacteria. However, too much exposure to the air will ruin just about any dish: creams curdle, meat toughens, vegetables soften, starches harden. If you’re going to store something at room temperature, stick it in a ziploc bag, plastic wrap, or aluminum foil quickly, and it’ll last longer even without the refrigerator.
4) Occasionally, try something new.
Obviously, as a uni student you should try lots of new things---but as a uni student cooking for yourself, I encourage you to occasionally experiment. Make bread, if you’ve never made bread before; try a desert if you’ve been focused on single-serving chicken breasts. Once every few months, try cooking or baking something you’ve absolutely never tried. (For hard mode, pick something completely out of the ballpark---for example, a couple months ago I tried to make a meringue and failed miserably. But I think I understand why I failed and that’s made me a better cook in the interim.)
It is, of course, very important that we eat in a way that serves our body and its needs. But at the same time, making food has always struck me as serving more than just need---we make food to show our love and appreciation for others (isn’t feeding an act of service?), to articulate desires we can’t verbalize, to satisfy unreasonable cravings, to demonstrate capability, to prove our worthiness, to offer something that isn’t-sex-but-is, etc. etc. etc. Food is very rarely ever just food. Which means that sometimes, we should sequester ourselves in the kitchen and see if we can make that....thing from the Great British Bakeoff.
As a footnote, I hope my coworkers enjoy haphazardly baked alaska.
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breanime · 6 years ago
Text
Neighbors
Requested by @slytheringranger:  Reader gets annoyed (and maybe slightly jealous) because her cat starts running away to her new neighbour who usually keeps to himself (and who happens to be the one and only Billy Russo). Some additional info - of course I have to ask for good version of Billy, who's also scarred(because I am having a lot of feelings) because he tried to help Frank; and that's why Reader doesn't see him a lot. If plot allows it I would like also some guest appearance of Karen, Frank and Curtis visiting Billy.
Thanks for the request, I hope you like it! (Fun fact: I hate the title)
*gif not mine* (I had to use this one, I loved this moment)
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It had been three weeks since your new neighbor had moved in and you still hadn’t met him. Normally that wouldn’t have mattered to you���it’s not like you really cared who had moved in down the hall from you, it was just… The guy was so…mysterious. He hadn’t even come to check the place out—you knew that because you had been home nursing your cat, Basil, back to health around the time your neighbor had started inquiring about the empty apartment. Instead, he sent three uniquely gorgeous people to look at it for him. In the process of the guy deciding to take the place, you ended up meeting all three of them.
The first one you met was called Curtis. He was ridiculously charming, with warm eyes and a kind smile that had you trusting him immediately. You had run into him in the lobby when he was trying to get up toy your floor. The visitor’s access code to the elevator wasn’t working, so you just punched yours in for him. He asked you questions about the apartment: how’d you like living there, what were the tenants like, how reliable was maintenance—so you thought he was looking at the property at first.
“Oh, nah,” he had laughed, “I’m just checking it out for a friend. He couldn’t make it today, so I’m just doing the leg work.”
“Oh,” you tried to hide your disappointment—Curtis seemed like he’d make for a good neighbor, “well, it’s a great place, people mostly keep to themselves…”
“Not you, though? Right?” He smiled down at you.
You laughed back. “I mean, I’m not gonna lie and say I’m a social butterfly,” you shrugged, “but I’ve been trapped in a house with a fussy cat for the last few days, so I’m kind of craving human conversation.”
“Well, maybe don’t count on my guy for that. He’s…” Curtis gave a one-shouldered shrug, looking a little disheartened before giving you another dazzling grin. “…not nearly as charming as me.”
“I bet.” You two stepped out of the elevator at the same time. Curtis had told you that he was waiting for the leasing agent to let him into the apartment, so you made the decision to stick around and make small talk until then. “Hopefully he’ll like it; it’s a nice place to live.”
“Maybe. He’s…” Curtis chuckled. “…kind of like your cat: fussy. My guy, he’s not like me…”
“Tall, dark, and handsome?” You asked before you could stop yourself.
Your word vomit was rewarded with another deep chuckle from Curtis. “I mean, my own girlfriend thinks he’s better-looking then me, so…”
“Can I just say, even though I just met you, it sounds like your girlfriend is living her best life?”
Another laugh. He opened his mouth to say something to you, but the elevator dinged, and the leasing agent stepped out. “Looks like the show’s about to start,” he said.
“It was nice meeting you, Curtis,” you extended your hand, “I hope your friend likes the apartment.”
“Same here, Y/N,” he shook your hand, grinning as he turned to greet the agent, “The apartment’s still in question, but…I know he’s gonna like you.”
That encounter had birthed your first surge of interest in your potential new neighbor, and you ended up meeting the other two unnecessarily good-looking people a few days later.
You had been at work all day, and you knew Basil—who was feeling better—would be meowing angrily at you for the rest of the evening. He hated tardiness. The elevator had been making a weird noise for the last 48 hours, and your landlord said he’d have the mechanic take a look at it soon, but you took it anyway. You were too tired to take the stairs, and besides, it was rare that anything broke in your building. You were just about to press your floor number when a feminine voice called out “hold the elevator!”.
You pressed yourself to the wall as an unreasonably gorgeous woman with light hair floated into the elevator. She smiled, thanking you, and you made some kind of squealing noise in response. She did not look like a real person; she looked like someone who should be playing a real person on TV or something. She was wearing a simple, powder blue button-up shirt with a black skirt and she still looked too good to be true. Her companion, however, you had definitely seen on TV.
Frank Castle was a household name in New York, but this was your first time ever seeing him in person (obviously). You had followed his trial, his subsequent death, then his rebirth as the Punisher up to his recent exploits exposing a government conspiracy. This was the first time you’d seen him without blood all over him, and man… The Punisher was actually kind of cute, he reminded you of a well-trained human pitbull. He was wearing a gray baseball cap that did nothing to disguise himself, but he got an A for effort. You made an effort not to stare, and the three of you stood silently as the elevator churned and started moving… Until it made a kind of choking noise, complete with flickering lights.
“What the hell?” Frank said, his voice gruff. All three of you stared up at the ceiling of the elevator until the lights stopped flickering and died out.
“No no no no,” you sighed, “son of a bitch.”
“Does this happen often?” The woman asked you, brows furrowed.
You shook your head. “No, this is the first time since I’ve lived here.”
“You think it’s a blackout?” She asked the Punisher.
“Nah,” he answered.
“It’s the elevator,” you supplied, “it’s been making this creaking noise for the last few days, and they said the mechanic would be here to take a look at it tomorrow,” you sighed, “and now it’s stuck.”
“Have you lived here long?” The woman asked.
You nodded. “Yeah, I—I haven’t seen you before. You must be looking at the empty apartment on my floor.”
“We are,” she put a delicate hand on her chest, “I’m Karen,” she placed her hand on the Punisher’s broad shoulder, “and this is Frank.”
“Y/N,” you replied, “and—don’t get me wrong, I think it’d be badass to have the Punisher down the hall from me—but you guys know it’s just a single, right?”
Frank laughed. “Thought I was doin’ alright being incognito.”
“Yeah, you… You are not,” you gave a nervous chuckle, “would it be weird to say that I’m kind of a fan?”
“It absolutely would not,” Karen said enthusiastically.
“This place,” Frank turned to you, a small smile on his face, “you said it’s a single? Does it have a decent amount of space, though?”
“Mm hmm,” you nodded, “all the units on my floor are single. I mean, it’s enough for me and my cat-son, but it might be a little small for a couple.”
“Oh—” you could see a rush of heat go to Karen’s cheeks, even in the dark, “—no, we’re…we’re not a couple.”
“Just friends.” Frank said simply.
“Plus we’re not looking,” Karen explained, “we’re just checking it out for a friend. We’re the last test before he buys it.”
“Huh. This is the second time I’ve met someone doing something like that. Is that a thing now? I’m always the last one to know about things.” You said, remembering Curtis.
“No,” Karen laughed, “we’re just doing our friend a favor. Our other friend—actually, he might be the one you met—was here before us.”
“You got a cat,” Frank asked you before turning to Karen, “she might be the cat lady Curt was tellin’ us about.”
“I only have one cat! …Currently.”
Frank chuckled. “Right.” He looked up at the ceiling. “I’m gonna go check this out.” With a grunt, he jumped up and crawled out of the roof of the elevator.
Your jaw dropped open as you stared at the now open roof, but Karen was unfazed.
“So our friend,” she continued, ignoring the grunting and ripping noises that were now coming from the roof, “served with Frank and Curtis in the Marines. He played a big part in helping Frank with…with what he needed to deal with, and he got hurt.” She pushed some hair behind her ear. “He’s kind of become a recluse since then, so… If he does decide to get this place, maybe… if you don’t mind, maybe just make a point to say hi to him or something? Make him feel welcome?”
“Of course,” you agreed easily, “any friend of Curtis is a friend of mine.”
You heard Frank laugh above you, and just like that—the elevator started up again. You rode the rest of the way with Karen and Frank before it got to your floor.
“Well, I hope you guys like the place,” you said as you parted ways, “and if your friend does take it, tell him I’m right down the hall if he needs anything!”
That had been three weeks ago. Apparently, the apartment passed the test because a few days later, Curtis stopped by your place to tell/warn you his friend had bought the property. Frank and Curtis helped the guy move in, but they only came at night. Basil, nosy as ever, had been so curious about the noise that he spent half the night at the door, scratching and meowing, trying to see what was going on. You saw your neighbor’s back—once—as you were coming in late at night. You heard Curtis’ laugh from the apartment—the door was open, and Frank was trying to roll a table through it.
“Hey, Y/N!” Frank greeted you.
“Hi, Frank,” you called back, pushing Basil back with your foot, “Hey, Curtis!”
“Hey!” Curtis’ voice was a bit muffled, but still as warm as it had been the day you met.
You wanted to talk with them, but Basil was doing that cat-thing where his body stopped following the laws of physics, so you needed to close the door before he ran out. He was a frisky little bastard. But, just as you were closing the door, you turned one last time and saw a tall, thin figure in the hall next to Frank. He had a dark hoodie on with the hood up and cut a striking figure—but that was all you saw before you had to shut the door.
A few days later, you were tempted to let your curiosity get the better of you. So, in the act of being neighborly, you decided to officially welcome tall-dark-and hooded to your building. You opened the door, still formulating your welcome speech, when Basil ran past you and sped down the hall.
“Basil!” You cried out. “Get back here!”
He, naturally, ignored your request and instead ran right to your neighbor’s door where he promptly started meowing loudly and scratching at the wood.
“Shit,” you muttered, tiptoeing over, “Basil, stop that, c’mere…” You got to the door and leaned down to pick him up. Basil jumped out of your grasp and ran his nails on the door harder. “Oh my—stop being an asshole,” you clicked your tongue. Basil meowed back at you—he had never been afraid to talk back—and you reached for him again. Just then, as you were crouched down on the floor arguing with a cat, the door swung open.
You first stared at the pair of feet—clad in pristine white gym shoes—before your gaze slowly moved up. He was wearing grey sweatpants over his long legs, a white t-shirt over his tight chest (not as broad as Frank’s or Curtis’ but still inviting), and his face… He was extremely handsome. He had impossibly dark eyes, short, brown hair, and a frown on his face. There were scars—light and zigzagged—but they didn’t detract from his natural good looks, nor stop you from oogling him. Basil meowed happily, glad to have gotten his way.
Your neighbor cocked an eyebrow as he looked down at the two of you. “…Can I help you?” He had a New York accent that made you tingle just a little bit.
You reached out for Basil, eyes still on your neighbor. Basil, however, was also trying to get a better look at the man and was rubbing his face against his leg, making satisfied little noises. “I—hi. Hi,” you stammered, arms outstretched, “I’m Y/N, I live right down the hall. I was just, um,” you finally looked down and saw that Basil was walking around the man now, in and out of the doorway. “Basil!” You hissed. “Get over here!”
“Ah,” the man said, reaching down to stroke Basil’s head, “so this is the cat I’ve been hearing about,” Basil craned his neck to get more scratches, “I’m Billy.”
“Him” you said again, “Um, look, Billy, I was just going to come say hi and then Basil ran out—”
“—right. I should have…introduced myself before now.”
“No, it’s no problem,” you scooped up Basil, who meowed in protest as you stood up, “sorry to bother you.” You were suddenly flustered at seeing Billy—the hottest of his group of unnecessarily hot friends—and needed to get away as soon as possible. “Let me know if he damaged your door,” you called to Billy before you disappeared into your apartment. You slammed the door closed with your back and cursed to yourself. Of course he was hot. Of course. You hated that you had been so awkward, and you vowed, with an armful of cat, to be cool the next time you saw him.
You were never cool when you saw him. Billy worked a lot, which meant he was in and out of the apartment quite a bit. You ran into him—literally—while he was getting on the elevator and you were getting off. It wouldn’t have been so bad, except you were on your phone having a heated debate with Basil (who had learned how to video-call you using your laptop).
“I swear to God, Basil, if you chewed up my couch again, I’ll—” you were stopped short when you slammed into Billy. You would have fallen on your ass at the impact—the man had a solid chest—but Billy held you steady.
He glanced down at your phone and laughed when he saw Basil’s face in the camera. “Are you facetiming your cat?” He asked.
You had never heard his laugh before. It was melodic and deep and you liked it a lot. You felt your face heat up, but answered him anyway. “He hacks my computer and calls me sometimes,” you explained, “sorry about,” you gestured between you. His hands were still on your waist.
Billy let you go and took a step back. “No problem.”
You gave him a weak wave and ran off, keeping the memory of his laugh in your heart.
The next time you saw him was late at night. You had just taken the trash out and were coming back into your apartment as he was going out. Basil had memorized the sound of Billy’s footsteps and had gotten into the habit of trying to run out into the hall whenever he knew Billy was out there. You ended up running into Billy at least five times a week as you had to chase after Basil. However, you almost never saw Billy this late at night. You watched, hand on your doorknob, as Billy knelt down to pet Basil. Basil, who took a year to even allow himself to be in the same room as your ex, happily allowed the interaction.
“Hey,” Billy had greeted you.
“Hi,” you said back, “You know, he’s not usually this friendly.”
Billy smiled, and you found yourself grinning back. “Neither am I.” His dark eyes roamed over your body before he spoke again. “You shouldn’t go out so late at night.”
“Oh. I was just taking out the trash—”
“I can do that,” he stood up and Basil nuzzled his leg, “Just knock on my door next time you need the trash taken out. It’s not a problem,” he assured you.
“Okay,” you said slowly, unsure how to react to this random kindness. Basil had padded back over to you, meowed at you to get moving, and went back inside. “Okay, thanks…good night.”
You continued to run into Billy on and off for the next few weeks. You learned that he had been in the Marines for over eight years in the elevator and that he owned a company called Anvil. He really did start taking out your trash, so you made it a point to grab his mail from the front desk for him and personally deliver it—which is how you learned that Frank, Curtis, and Karen were like family to him in an interestingly open conversation. You found out that Billy was born and raised in New York during one of Basil’s escape attempts, and later told him about the time you almost drowned on a field trip during another one. Each time you wished that you could see him more, talk with him more, but you were usually awkwardly chasing your cat around or looking very uncool as you tried to carry a huge package to his door, so you never pushed for more. Finally, you decided that the next time you left your apartment you would look good, you would be cool…
…The next time you saw him you did not look cool at all. You looked…very uncool. You were so swamped at work that you had to take it home to finish. Which lead to you having to stay up all night buried under paperwork with chopsticks in your hair. Basil was not amused with the lack of attention you were giving him, meowing and complaining so loudly that you had to kick him out of your bedroom. At some point you remembered that you needed food to survive, so you ordered food, nearly ripped the food out of the delivery guy’s arms, scarfed it down in a rush of limbs and noodles, and got back to work. You were really making headway with your work, which was why you were in no mood for company when you heard a knock on your door.
You yanked the door open, a scowl on your face—and froze. Your neighbor Billy was standing there holding Basil in his arms. He was wearing a suit and tie while you had on your old Hamilton shirt, chopsticks keeping your messy hair up, and a pair of mismatched socks.
“Your cat broke into my place again.” Billy said, smirking at your attire.
Your eyes widened. “I am so sorry—wait, again? What? How did he even get out?”
“I think he snuck out when you answered the door earlier,” Billy said, Basil was purring in his hold, “And he breaks into my place every few days,” he shrugged, unbothered, “I think he gets in the air vents and army crawls back and forth.”
“I—I am so sorry, I had no idea! Why didn’t you tell me?”
Billy gave another shrug. “I think we work different hours, I can never catch you. I always make sure he’s fed and gets home safe, though.” Basil nudged Billy’s hand with his nose in an affectionate gesture. “He’s a cute cat.”
“I think he likes you more than he likes me,” you grumped. “Um, really, Billy, I really am sorry about this. I’m usually more perceptive than this.”
“You don’t need to be sorry. If I’m being honest, I kind of like seeing him so often.”
You gave a nervous laugh. “Wish I could say the same for you.” You watched as Billy’s eyes widened at your statement and swore Basil was smirking at your stupidity. Only you would have a cat who liked home invasions and only you would have such a case of chronic foot-in-mouth disease. “Ohmygod,” you muttered, unsure of what to say next.
“You… You want to see me more often?” Billy asked. You were certain Basil was cocking an eyebrow as he waited for your response.
“I… I… I would not be opposed to that,” you said carefully.
Billy put a large hand on Basil’s head, contemplating. “You… You want to see me?” He asked again. “Like this?”
“Like what? Tall and hot and cool when I’m the opposite of all that?” You shrugged, letting your nervous energy steer the ship. “Yeah, man.”
Billy chuckled. He stroked Basil’s head. “No, I mean,” he swallowed, “I mean like this…with the scars.”
“Oh.” You scanned his face, taking in the different scars. They really weren’t that bad, and even if they were, you liked Billy. The scars didn’t matter. “I almost forgot you have them. I don’t even notice them anymore.”
Billy blinked, looking like he was carefully processing the words you said. “Hm,” he looked down at Basil and then back up at you, “So the scars don’t bother you at all?” He asked.
“No,” you answered honestly, “I think they make you look kind of badass.”
He smiled then, ducking his head down. “Okay…So, if I asked you for your number…?”
You grinned. “You can have it.”
“How about a date?”
You nodded, and Basil meowed in his arms. “You can have that, too. Actually,” you took a step back into your apartment, “I was kind of getting cabin fever just now. Wanna take a walk with me?” You pressed home your advantage. “We can take Basil.”
“Take a cat for a walk in New York City, at night, with a beautiful woman?” Billy asked, his smile blinding. “I’d love to.”
Basil made a pleased sound and you couldn’t help but giggle. He knew exactly what he had done. “Let me just get his leash and some shoes,” you said, hurrying to grab those items. Billy waited patiently, asking about what kind of restaurant you liked best as he cradled Basil in his arms.
Man, you loved having a cat.
*********************************************************************************
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This was kind of long, wasn’t it? Comments always appreciated!
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octannibal-blake · 6 years ago
Text
this must be the place
rating: mature (for language)
words: 2,287
(ao3)
The universe tries to tell Bellamy not to go out, of that he’s almost certain.
One of the students in the class he’s TA’ing for decided to have a mental breakdown over finals and kept him in his office for almost an hour longer than normal. It was a lot of awkward reassurances and going over their final paper in minute detail, something which exhausted him far more than it should have,  After that, his truck mysteriously wouldn’t start, but only just long enough to put his day completely off track. Two cars tried to jump him, the first being unsuccessful but the second somehow having the magic touch. He barely got home in time to change into the stupid costume Miller had picked out for him, some gladiator outfit that was supposed to reminiscent of 300 because -- “Dude, it’s perfect for you and your nerdy greek fetish!”
They had a few issues calling the Uber, their order repeatedly getting cancelled, before deciding to just walk the mile to the bar. (Note: Greek-designed sandals are not ideal for long walks.) And upon arrival, Bellamy discovered he left his I.D at home, meaning another walk back to their house to grab it because damn it, after the day he’s had, he needs a fucking drink.
He arrives at Grounders during the second band, a local punk band who are appropriately singing only Halloween songs -- a punk version of Monster Mash in not something he knew he needed until now -- and tries not to think about all the shit that’s gone wrong in the last ten hours.
He should have followed the warning signs because now he’s here alone at the bar mid beer-sip,  as Clarke Griffin, of all people, strides toward him wearing a spandex Deadpool outfit with a purpose that equally scares the shit out of him and turns him on.
“Blake.” she greets casually as she moves in front of him. He’s still getting used to her hair, the choppy platinum blonde locks with red peeking out from under the edges. It’s a new thing, something she did when she decided to, as she explained her mother’s description to him during a library study session: “Completely throw her life away!” He liked her hair before, long golden curls cascading down her back (not that he’s paid that much attention), but this look suits her more.
“Griffin.” he smirks. It’s an automatic reaction around her, mostly because he knows she hates the Blake Smirk™  but also because he enjoys the way she pops out her hip in annoyance every time he does it. It’s routine, at this point.
(Again, he’s not paying that much attention.)
“I need a favor,” she reaches up to tousle her hair, something she only tends to do when she’s anxious, her eyes flit over her shoulder.
He should make some joke and move on. It’s not like they’re, you know, friends or anything. They just so happen to be in the same circle of friends.  And maybe they’ve had classes together over the past couple of years...and been project partners in most of them. But she’s also his sisters arch nemesis so, no, they aren’t friends. It’s against the code.
“And what’s that, Princess?” he sips his beer again, trying to pretend the way she bites her lip doesn’t make his heart thud against his rib cage.
“Kiss me.”
If this were a romantic comedy, he’s almost positive a screeching record scratch would be inserted here.
He manages to cough up almost the entire drink he just took, “I’m sorry, what?”
He really never got the full story about Clarke or why his sister seemed to hate her. They were in the same class in highschool and Octavia wasn’t her biggest fan. He believes her words word: “That fucking snot-nosed spoiled bitch thinks she’s so much better than everyone!” And it’s his sister, so of course her enemies are his enemies. Except she joined the Marines and hauled ass as far away from Bellamy as she could get and he ended up at Columbia with Clarke so, really, it’s her fault because she left.
(Note: The code, as far as he knows, is dead and it’s really just an excuse for him to pretend he’s not madly in love with Clarke Griffin.)
He tried to keep his distance, especially after their fight at Freshman Orientation, also known as The Blake-Griffin Blow Out, a very well known screaming match that they are often reminded of any time they walk through the quad. Not one of his finer moments, where he was feeling particularly hateful because his sister decided to run off to the armed forces and he was looking for a fight. She was an easy target but he had not anticipated her to fight back, especially in a series of expletives and insults he had no idea she was capable of -- the problem with knowing someone in high school is that they know some of your more embarrassing moments, and having those put on blast during fucking freshman orientation was NOT part of the plan.
Sure, they’ve come a long way since then. Friends, mostly, and the bickering is all part of the relationship. The very platonic relationship in which he’s never, ever thought about kissing her. No, not at all.
(Fact check: that’s bullshit, Bellamy Blake has, in fact, imagined kissing Clarke Griffin many times. So many times, he should be embarrassed.)
“You remember the guy I was dating a while back?” she continues. He nods, because words aren’t really forming for him in this moment. “Yeah, he’s here -- don’t fucking look!”
His head snaps back to her and she reaches up to touch his shoulder. His blood feels warm.
“Anyways, he’s here and I’d like to not interact with him so if you could pretend to like, be my boyfriend for a few minutes that would be awesome.”
Her words oddly sound far away, almost like he’s underwater. Maybe she’s mistaken him for someone else. Maybe it’s a joke. They play pranks on each other all the time. There’s no way she’s asking to kiss him. Right?
“So instead of just not talking to him, you want him to think you’re dating me?” he’s proud of himself for sounds remotely normal because his heart is probably at 150 beats per minute and his brain hasn’t really caught up.
“Yes?”
He glances over he shoulder again and see someone approaching quick. He’s shorter guy, glossy hair, and frankly, not what he pegged Clarke’s type to be. He seems to have her in his sights, so he has to act quick. He turns his attention back to her.
“Backstreet boy? Desperation and a tad bit of psychopathy seeping from his pores? ”
“Ew, you know I hate that word,” she groans and he doesn’t have time to joke because now he’s within earshot.
Fuck it.
He tangles his free hand into her hair and pulls her gently towards him. Her lips are soft and warm, her chapstick leaving behind a small hint of mint. She melts into him, causing him to smirk victoriously into the kiss. Her nails scrape the back of his neck as if telling him to shut up and before he really even knows what’s happening, he’s running his tongue along the seam of her lips and she’s more than enthusiastically accepting of him. As far as make out’s go, it’s fairly tame. But he feels every moments of the kiss deep in his core, like puzzle pieces falling into place or lightning striking three times in a row. Satisfying and something that doesn’t happen every day.
Things Bellamy should absolutely not be doing right now:
Kissing Clarke Griffin
Enjoying kissing Clarke Griffin
It could be minutes or hours later, he’s not really sure, but when they finally pull back the entire bar suddenly feels too crowded. He searches her face and if the far away look in her eyes is indicative of how she feels, well, he imagines she’s thinking the same thing.
Things Bellamy is doing now:
1. Wanting to kiss Clarke Griffin again.
2. Possibly, maybe suggesting they continue doing it. 
“Are you really interested in seeing the last band?” he asks and she laughs, hand still wrapped around his neck. She leans up to peck him again, grinning wildly at him and God, he really loves making her smile.
“No. Let me tell Harper I’m leaving.” She winks, fucking winks, and heads off to find her friend and he turns to close his tab, trying not to act like a love struck idiot. The bartender gives him a look, something along the lines of seriously, you just opened it? And he shrugs, signing off on the bill and leaving a good tip because he’s in a good mood and he’s feeling generous.
He catches sight of Miller at the other end and approaches, trying to hide the goofy smile threatening to overtake his face. He must fail because Miller greets him with a kinked eyebrow, “What the fuck are you so happy about?”  
He’s not sure what say. Clarke’s coming over. We just made out and I’m hoping we can do it more. Or maybe, I finally made a move on her, you can stop making jokes about sexual tension.
(Fun fact: Miller has long believed that he and Clarke just had a bad case of sexual tension. Bellamy is dreading the moment he has to tell him he’s right.)
“I’m taking Clarke home,” is what he settles on. Simple and not really a lie. He doesn’t specify whose home. Or what that entails.
Miller’s shit eating grin tells him he already knows what that means, “Yeah, I saw you attached at the mouth a minute ago. Wish you would have done that like six months ago. I owe Monty fifty bucks.”
“What?”
“Yeah, there was bet going on when you guys would get your heads out of your asses and apparently, I had too much faith in you. Took you long enough, Jesus.”  Miller actually seems genuinely grumpy about this.
Of course their friends bet on it. He should be mad that someone was making money on his love life, but his mood is hard to ruin at this point.
“So Monty won?” He won’t admit that satisfaction of Miller losing. Serves him right for getting involved and being a dick about it.
“I hate you.”
“See you later,” he claps him on the shoulder and Miller flips him off as he passes.
He searches the crowd for the blonde bob and scowls when he finds her next to the glossy-haired ex-boyfriend. She looks uncomfortable, not making eye contact with they guy and instead searching the room. He heads towards them, trying not to feel triumphant when she perks up at the sight of him.
“Bell!” she calls when he gets closer and the Harry Styles knock off glares.
“You ready to go?” he asks, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her closer. She leans into him, doing her best to look apologetic towards Justin Bieber.
“I’ll see you around,” she tells him and Bellamy leads her off. He keeps his arm around her as they leave and once they find the exit she lays her head on his shoulder and laughs. His hand finds its way back into her hair, scraping at her scalp as he chuckles along. It’s almost like now that he’s touched her, he doesn’t want to stop.
It’s completely unhealthy and irrational, but he’s never been rational around her.
There is a comfortable silence as they stand outside, just leaning into each other. Exploring new territory but tentative to move forward. The lines between real and fake have become blurred, but he’s feeling particularly bold now, perhaps because of the show they just put on or because deep down, he knows it wasn’t a show at all.
“I hope you know that kiss wasn’t fake for me,” he murmurs. She lifts her head from his shoulder to look at him, her blue eyes searching his face for any indication that he might be joking.
“Me either,” she says quietly.
“Good.”
“Good.”
And they start laughing again, because it really is ridiculous that this is how it happened. They’ve been dancing around it for years, it’s always been there even when they didn’t want to see it. The opportunity has presented itself under less awkward circumstances -- late night study sessions, times she’s fallen asleep on his shoulder. The time she stayed with him for two days when her heat went out.
(The Truth: he’s been afraid because Clarke is terrifying and amazing and he wonders why someone like her would want to be with some like him. But he’s done questioning it.)
“I’ve had a crush on you since high school,” she mutters into his shoulder, avoiding his gaze but continuing with her confessions, “I was just terrified Octavis would kick my ass.”
“She probably would have,” he confirms and she smacks his arm playfully. “I’ve been going crazy trying to be just friends, for what it’s worth.”
“Really?” he hates how surprised she sounds, but he’ll spend however long she needs proving it to her.
“You have no idea.”
“Oh, I think I do.” She grips the plastic breastplate of his gladiator costume and she pulls him towards her, smiling against his lips as he holds her waist.
This kiss is better than the last. This time it’s on their terms, no ex-boyfriend storming towards them. No crowd watching. Bets being made. It’s just them. How it’s supposed to be.
Fuck the universe and it’s attempts at preventing him from this moment. He wins.
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infinityactual · 6 years ago
Text
Love and the Spartan IIs
So.
I'm so fucking deep in his fandom now that I'm writing gay fanfiction for the first time in my life. How I missed that boat at 15 I have no idea. But it's giving me life in so many ways as I sit here in the landfill with my Trash Cheerleaders, writing a rarepair I'd never considered but that fits so well....
Anyway...
I'm working on the basic frame of another project as well that's suddenly become very deep and detailed as far as human psychology goes...and I feel the need to voice an opinion that I've formed both from my own personal experiences and from talking to my Cheer Squad about humans in general.
So the Spartan IIs, due to how they were raised and trained, by default probably only got the Basic Bitch super-clinical sex ed: male impregnates female, female gestates approximately nine months, a baby is born. Voila. Also, it's noted in the lore that he thyroid implant may have the side effect of reducing/eliminating sex drive/desire to reproduce. And you can't miss what you've never had or known about(You can want it, but it becomes a much bigger deal after you experience it and like it). Though, they've probably developed some interesting and funny ideas of their own over the years as they listen to Marines/ODSTs chatter about stuff.
However; the IIs are painfully, irrevocably human. And in most cases, humans need contact with other humans to remain healthy, function and even survive. Which is why I wholeheartedly endorse any headcanon that they're a bunch of touch-starved cinnamon rolls. Monkey brain requires cuddles.
But a lot of what I've seen over the years involving the IIs feelings is a bit weird to me, especially in regards to love and romance.
Now: I agree that the IIs are going to only vaguely know what these things are. Human emotion is nebulous and stupendously complex and intricate. But I'm willing to bet my whole ass that the Spartan IIs experience love and maybe even romance on their own level. They just don't know what it is.
My husband and I have a very strange marriage from the POV of most other humans. The best way I can think to describe it is Friends with Benefits, except antidepressants cut out the benefits. We game, we call each oher names and harass each other. We care about each other's mental state, health and feelings. But all of the trappings of anything resembling a traditional American marriage is just not fucking present. There are days I fucking forget I'm married. No flowers or date nights here, just lots of terrible joke and anxiety-inducing adulting.
But we love each other. Differently than you expect, but it's still love. There is romance here, but it's our personal version of romance. It's not dead, just unrecognizeable. And if it's one thing I've learned from talking to the Cheer Squad, it's that every human is different, and has a different feel for what love and romance is. It just depends on the person.
I have no doubt John loves Blue Team. He fucking loves them. It's obvious. He doesn't want to fuck or marry any of them, most likely, but he loves them. And I'm pretty fucking sure that here are gestures or acts oerformed within Blue Team over the course of their lives that could count as romance. Not traditional romance, but the Spartan IIs own unique brand of romance.
Instead of flowers, John pulls some strings to get Linda that extra-special ammo she likes for her rifle.
Kelly gives John and emote or touch he needs, when he needs it. Not a massage or a kiss, rather she bumps against him lightly when he knows she would never be that careless, or does the smile emote more enthusiastically than normal.
I could see Linda trying to keep Fred from worying by gathering as much intel as she can on whatever he's worried about.
Fred bargains w Marines for extra candy bars right before or after a mission to boost team morale (they're giant kids, shut up)
TL;DR: the IIs may not know what to call what they have, but they have it. It's just not stereotypical. And they'd probably find stereotypical concepts of love and romance both strange and funny.
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mrmonster459 · 2 years ago
Text
Summer Robinson: Nightmare of Port Wentworth (Part One)
"Summer Robinson!" A goon shouted from the other side of my apartment door. “If you’re in there, open this door, now!"
"What's the rush?" I asked.
“Summer, you’re already in deep shit with my boss. If I have to get in there myself, I’m gonna mash up that pretty face of yours. Is that enough of a rush for you?”
“Nah, not really.” I said. “Futurama is on, and I’ve got a Tattooed Chef meal in the microwave. Can I see you in about half an hour?”
“That’s it.” He said as he kicked down my door.
And there he was; a 6’4, and jacked local mob enforcer. Pretty sure his street name was Chainz, which I thought was pretty stupid, but whatever.
Chainz reached into his pockets. One hand pulled out a six inch blade, the other pulled out a twelve inch extendable baton.
“You could’ve just let me in.” He said. “I could’ve just collected what you owe my boss, and been on my way. But I do love it when you slum trash put up a good fight, it makes my job so much more fun.”
He came at me and tried to hit me in the head with the baton. I ducked underneath, weaved around his arm, and then came back with a left hook that landed right in his gut.
He winced over in pain. He clearly had no idea how hard a smaller woman like me could hit.
Nonetheless, he clearly wasn’t out of the game. He then tried to stab me, but I blocked his arm, and pulled him in for a wrist lock that forced him to drop the knife.
“You little bitch.” He said as he then grabbed the back of my head and pushed me into a wall. From there, he landed a powerful haymaker across my face.
“Make no mistake, I will kill you tonight.” He said as he threw another punch. “But not before I put you through all the pain I can.”
I blocked his next punch, and then created space using a push kick. One I had a little room between us, I quickly spun around and threw a reverse side kick that landed directly in the right side of his rib cage.
“Damn.” He said as he stumbled back in pain. I could tell just by the way he was breathing that I broke at least one rib, maybe two or three.
And then, I finished him off by taking one step forward, twisting around, and throwing a powerful tornado kick that finished him off.
My neighbor, Vanessa Gutirrez, heard what was going on and came by.
“Are you alright?” She asked as she walked in.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I said. “I took a few hits, but I’m okay.’
She took one look at the unconscious thug and said “Need help getting him out of here?”
“No.” I said. “I actually wanted him to come, I need to ask him some questions about his boss.”
“Oh, I see.” She said. “In that case, let me get some duct tape.”
Vanessa always struck me as a no-nonsense type of woman. She was a Marine corps veteran, a mechanic (the only woman in her shop), and a big motorcycle enthusiast. Her daily life was to go to work, come home, do all her own maintenance in her apartment (our landlord was more than willing to do it for her, but she insisted on doing it herself), and relaxing with scotch and cigars.
“Here you go, kid.” She said as she tossed me a roll of duct tape.
“Thanks.” I said. “Mind helping me lift him up onto a chair?”
“No problem.” She said.
I should probably give you a little more context. Port Wentworth was a small, working class suburban town who’s two biggest industries were manufacturing, and organized crime. Mob bosses from the city would base themselves out here because they knew the police in Port Wentworth could be bought with a few hundred bucks, and the occasional night with a prostitute.
The one redeeming part of that shit town was that in Port Wentworth, poor people knew they had to look out for each other. Which is why I knew I could expect help from Vanessa.
Once we had our thug securely taped to a chair, Vanessa said “I’ll go get my power drill, we’ll need it to fix the door.” She said. “And then, we can crack some cold ones and talk about what you’re doing here.”
“Sounds good.” I said.
We knew it would take the loan shark a while to wake up, so we had time. First, we rescrewed the hinges on my door back into place. Then, she brought over a cold six pack and we hashed things out.
“Three ex-wives have taught me the value of a good case of beer.” She said as she popped open one of the cans and handed it to me. “So, talk to me; why’s a girl like you trying to get the attention of a loan shark’s boss? And how’d you beat him?”
“Because he killed my brother.” I said. “A longtime ago, but still, I never got over it.”
“When we were kids, we had nothing. Our Mom worked day-and-night at the diner just to keep us alive after our dad ran out on us. My brother joined the local mob hoping to make some extra money, even though I begged him not to.”
“It was fine for the first two years or so. He made enough money to where we wouldn’t go to bed hungry; even had enough to take us out for dinner on our birthdays. But then, everything changed when he was arrested for robbing a pharmacy that refused to pay the mob its protection fee.”
“The day after he signed a plea deal, he was found dead in his cell. Conveniently, the prison’s security cameras malfunctioned at the time, and they never found his killer.”
“I know they killed him; I know that they knew one of their members pleading guilty would be bad for their public image, so they had him killed before he had the chance to say anything that might have gotten them in trouble with the feds.”
“That was ten years ago, when I was just 14 years old; and ever since, I’ve been training myself to take revenge.”
“I dropped out of high school and worked two jobs to have enough money to start training, and boy did I train; I spent almost every second of my free time at boxing gyms, martial arts schools, and shooting ranges. By the time I was 17, I had black belts in taekwondo and Brazilian jiu-jitsu, and had won three amateur boxing tournaments. By the time I was 21, I won a statewide pistol shooting tournament and a statewide rifle shooting tournament.”
“And then, a month ago, on the tenth anniversary of the day he was killed, I decided to finally get my revenge.” I explained. “I found out where the mob loaned out money, took out two grand, and never paid any of it back, knowing they’d send one of these guys after me. Now, it’s all a question of how I can take out his boss.”
“Well damn.” Vanessa said. “I only got one question; how can I help?”
“Helping me interrogate him once he wakes up would be a good start.” I answered.
Once he got up, the first thing out of his mouth was “I’ll give you whatever you want, just don’t kill me.”
“Oh, you’re definitely right about the first part.” I said as I turned on my electric carving knife. “You will give me all the information I want. As for me not killing you, that’ll depend on if I’m satisfied with what you give me or not?”
“Okay, okay.” He said. “Please, just tell me what you want to know?”
“I want to know where I can find your boss.” I asked.
“My boss, Mr. Johnston, works out of the Matheson Distribution center.” He said. “You know, the big grey building over on 32nd street.”
“I’m familiar.” I said.
“That’s where Mr Johnston’s office is.” He said. “But if you think you can get to him, you’re in for a Hell of a surprise. The ‘night shift’ crew is actually just a select team of really tough enforcers who get paid extra to be Mr. Johnston’s personal bodyguards. You’re not getting past them without a small army.”
“Yeah, we’ll see about that.” I said as I made a new piece of duct tape.
“Hey, what are you doing now?”
“Now, I’m putting this over your mouth so you don’t scream.” I explained. “Not that anyone in this shithole would come help you, but still, better safe than sorry.”
“If your information is good, then I’ll come back, untie you, and set you free. After tonight, it’s not like you’ll have a boss to collect debt for anyway.”
“Or, if your information ends up being a bunch of bullshit, I’m gonna come back.” I said as I picked up my electric knife. “And make sure you tell the truth next time.”
I then turned to Vanessa and said “You don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to. This is obviously going to be dangerous, I can understand if you don’t want to come with me.”
“You kidding?” Vanessa asked. “This sounds like the most fun I’ve had since my dishonorable discharge.”
“Alright alright then.” I said. “Let me load up some of my guns, and then we’ll head out.”
Half an hour later, we drove out to the plant with a sedan full of loaded guns. That being said, there was one very specific weapon Vanessa insisted on taking.
“Summer, trust me, you want to take out the first dude with this.” She said as she showed me her crossbow. “It’ll be quick and, if you hit him in the first place, quiet. It’ll give us the chance to take out at least one before the others catch onto us.”
“Yeah, just one problem.” I said. “I’ve never fired a crossbow before.”
“Well, I have.” Vanessa said. “My second wife was a turkey hunter, we’d go crossbow hunting all the time.”
“Great.” I said. “You take the first shot, then I’ll sneak up and get in range of the others.”
“Deal.” Vanessa said.
At any given point, there was at least one guy sitting at the end of the loading dock, smoking a cigarette. If you were just driving by as an onlooker, you’d think he was just a night shift employee taking a smoke break. But once we knew that this whole joint was just a front, it was obvious that he was a guard on rotation, stationed there to watch for anyone approaching the building.
There was a locked gate, but nothing we couldn’t get through with bolt cutters. If this were a normal robbery, I’d be worried about getting seen on a security camera, but mobsters tended not to want any footage of their comings-and-goings to exist.
We approached the building, and once we were in range, Vanessa whispered “Get ready.” and I silently ran to the side of the building. Then, Vanessa shot a bolt that landed right the center of his neck.
He spent his last few moments trying to scream for help, but he couldn’t. And just seconds later, he collapsed on the ground, dead as can be.
Then, I ran up to the building, with a shotgun in hand. I opened the door, and made my way inside.
“What are you doing?” Someone asked. “Your shift isn’t over until eleven…”
Then, he saw that I was not the same guard that was now lying dead on the concrete outside. But before he could do anything, I filled his face with buckshot.
Before his body even hit the ground, I could hear two more coming my way from behind. I ran to take cover behind a forklift, and once they were in range, I fired two shots.
One of them was an instant kill; but the other only grazed his arm. He then took cover of his own behind a shipping container and shouted "All hands on deck, we have a hostile in the unloading area."
I heard guns being cooked and footsteps headed in my direction. I fired three more shots, and then ran out of shells. I didn't have time to reload, so I then drew my semi-auto handgun and kept moving.
I was able to get three shots off before getting overwhelmed and having to take cover again.
"Surround her." One of the thugs shouted, and the thugs dashed to positions around me. I was able to get off three more shots, killing two of them, but I couldn't get most of them. And by my counts, there were another eight.
I had no choice but to stay covered and shoot as best I could, but it wasn't enough. Just from what I could see, there were still nine of them, and most were armed. Ultimately, I just ran out of ammo.
"Alright, I surrender." I said as I put my hands up. I was taking a big risk, but it was my only option left.
"Cuff her, and bring her to the boss." A thug shouted. "He'll want to deal with her personally."
Two of them came in close to grab me. I then sidekicked one in the chest and punched another in the face before darting away.
But it didn't work. They grabbed me, pulled me to the floor, and kicked me in the head. "You're not getting out of here that easy."
And then, a man in a suit came out and said "Before I slice you to pieces, I want to know. Why did you want to kill me? I have no idea who you even are."
"Thomas Robinson." I said. "Do you know that name?"
"No." He answered.
"Yeah, figured." I said. "He was my older brother. Ten years ago, he was a new recruit in your gang. Your gang landed him in federal jail, where he was killed in the showers before he had the chance to strike a plea bargain. I came here for revenge."
"Well, you ain't getting it." He said as he pulled a knife out of his pocket.
Moments before I was gonna get stabbed, Vanessa burst in with an AK-47. She then fired at the two goons holding me in place before some of the others started firing back at her with handguns.
The mob boss tried to stab me, but I blocked his arm, and then threw an uppercut that landed right across his jaw.
While Vanessa kept firing at the remaining goons, I continued fighting them close quarters. I charged at one of them, grabbed his gun with one hand, and then used my other hand to punch him in the stomach. Another thug came at me, but I stopped him with a side kick before knocking him out with a crescent kick.
Four unarmed thugs then faced me. One of them tried to grab me around my back, but I back elbowed him before raising my foot and delivering a powerful back kick right to his nuts.
Another two of them came at me. One got in a powerful right hook that sent me stumbling into a wall. The other guy tried to roundhouse kick me, but I ducked out of the way, and he ended up slamming his foot against the bricks. I then grabbed him and made him fall over on his head, then turned to his buddy, pulled him in, and then slammed his head against the same wall he just slammed me into.
There was just one left. Only problem is that he was the biggest guy yet. Probably the smartest too; he'd watched his friends get the asses kicked, and now knew all my moves.
I threw a jab-cross-roundkick combo at him. He blocked every single strike. Then, he pulled me in close and shot a powerful knee strike right at my torso.
I ducked down, grabbed his leg, and took him to the ground. I was running on fumes at this point, I couldn't keep punching and kicking him, my only chance of winning was to subdue him.
Before he could try to get up, I was choking him out with my legs and putting him through a powerful armbar. After about thirty seconds or so, I was decently sure that he had succumbed to brain damage from lack of oxygen, and I left him there.
Mr. Johnston tried to run away, but I grabbed him by his shirt collar and threw him against the wall.
"I'll give you anything you want." He said. "Money, drugs, I've got it all."
"Buddy, all I want is you to be gone." I said as I stabbed him with the same knife he tried to stab me with.
By the time I was done with him, Vanessa had already finished mowing down the others. Once we were sure it was safe, we ran up to each other.
“You okay?” She asked me.
“Yeah, I’m fine.” I said.
“Did you get the boss?”
“Yes, I killed him with his own knife.” I answered.
“So, what now?” Vanessa asked. “You feeling satisfied now that you’ve gotten your revenge?”
“Not really.” I asked. “There’s still plenty of other scumbags like him in this town. What do you say we make this a permanent gig; you and me versus all of them?”
“Count me in.” She said as she lit a cigar. “I know of a pimp who could use a good beating.”
0 notes
reddieaddict · 7 years ago
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Eddie Gets A Bellybutton Ring HC
A/N: I’m reposting this because the first time I did, this didn’t how up on the Reddie tag. IDK why, but whatever. Obviously the characters are aged up. I imagine Ezra Miller as Richie and Timothee Chalamet as Eddie instead of Finn and Jack. Picture whoever you want, but you’re gonna be wrong. So sit there wrongly marinating in your wrongness being all wrong and shit. Also, there are two songs mentioned in this headcanon “Waves by Miguel (Tame Impala Remix)” and The Best Part by Daniel Caesar (feat H.E.R) which were the songs that inspired this whole HC, so I encourage you to listen to them when it gets to the part where they are mentioned. Or listen to whatever you want. IDC. I hope like! Viva La Reddievolucion!
So its the summer of 2018 and the losers had just finished junior year.
Eddie has been officially out since freshman year and mostly everyone is cool or just indifferent about it, except his mom.
She is always harping on him about “acting like a man,” calls him horrible slurs, and orders him to date girls.
Eddie is SICK of her harassing him, so he decides to do the exactly opposite and do something super gay as an act of rebellion.
So secretly he runs off and he gets a mother-fucking belly button ring! And not just any belly button ring, but a cute dangly one like this one!
At first he just did it to piss off his mom, but once he sees himself in the mirror with the ring, he kinda starts to love it? AND he can’t wait to show Richie.
Instead of just telling the Losers that he got the piercing, he decides to surprise them, so he sneakily suggest they all go to the quarry the next day for a swim.
The next day when they all strip into their bathing suits, Eddie makes sure Bev catches a glimpse, cause he knows she will make a big deal about it.
Sure enough, she screeches “OMG Eddie, is that a belly button ring!?”
“Yeah, ginger-bitch. Why? You jealous or what?”
“Its so fucking cute!”
Everyone is all over him, interrogating him, and touching it, while he talks about his motivations for getting it- everyone except Richie.
Richie is standing there stunned, astonished, speechless, dumbfounded, and a whole bunch of other adjectives.
Eddie had been on the track team ever since 8th grade, so he’s lost all the baby fat and is super tight and toned! Richie already thought he was super hot, but with that belly button ring? He was short circuiting!
This didn’t go unnoticed by Eddie.
Eddie loves the way Richie, his lifelong crush, is looking at him. So, he begins to flaunt his provocative piercing every chance he gets.
He’d do things like stretch, making his shirt rise and expose his belly button, making Richie blush and stutter incoherently.
He’ll change his shirt in front of Richie whenever he comes over to chill or study or whatever.
Sometimes he’d just lift his shirt and play with it or admire it just for the sake of fucking with Richie.
Richie fucking loves and hates that fucking piercing! On the one hand, Eddie looks fucking unbelievable, but on the other hand he hates that he can only look, but never touch. Plus all the inconvenient boners!
All the Losers know what the idiots are doing, but say nothing cause they’re both fucking dumb and gay.
So this goes on for months. Months of torture for both of them!
That is until one night, when Richie climbs up to Eddie’s window, but before he knocks, he gets a peak of Eddie dancing provocatively through a little gap in the curtains. He nearly falls of the roof.
Richie sneaks over all the time, but he usually texts Eddie before he heads over, but he didn’t this night. So Eddie wasn’t expecting him.
Completely unaware of Richie being there, he’s dancing around his room to Tame Impala’s remix of Miguel’s Waves, in those short shorts and a plain, but slightly sheer white tee while folding laundry and cleaning and shit. But he’s being super sensual about it, and would even stop occasionally to dance in front of the mirror.
He’d lift his shirt, exposing his piercing and do some belly-dancing Shakira ass moves.
Richie feels super guilty and pervy spying on him, so he taps on the window startling Eddie.
Eddie immediately deduces that Richie had seen the whole thing and at first is embarrassed, then kinda mad, but quickly gets over it.
He opens the window and pulls Richie in and asks him to dance along with him, like when they were kids.
Richie is still all flustered and awkward. This wasn’t like when they were kids, cause now there was romantic and sexual tension.
Eddie is like “Why are you being all weird and stiff? C’mon loosen up!” and Richie just mumbles incoherently.
Thinking it might help Richie feel more relaxed, he shuts off the lights, leaving the room illuminated by just the two vanilla scented candles Eddie had lit, the fairlylights draped around Eddie’s wall, and the light from the bathroom that seeped through the slightly open door.
It works, cause Richie starts to dance much more enthusiastically along to the music.
Richie and Eddie had always crossed boundaries with each other, and dancing was no exception. Eddie would grind on Richie, Richie would wrap his arms around Eddie.
This begin to escalate and they start teasing each other.
Eddie would link his arms behind Richie’s neck and lean in super close…so close their lips almost graze each other and just as Richie thinks he’s going to close the gap, he pulls away and keeps on dancing.
Richie retaliates by pulling Eddie in, twirling him around, and then dipping him, but keeps him suspended in his arms and also leans in super close. So close that Eddie is absolutely certain that Richie is going to kiss him, but just as he begins to pucker his lips slightly…Richie lifts him and keeps on dancing.
Eddie is pissed so he takes it to the next fucking level. He turns around and presses himself flush against Richie, his ass grinding against him.
Richie gets all stiff and Eddie notices, but decides to keep torturing his homie.
He takes Richie’s hands and guides them to his abs and silently encourages him to roam around his body.
Richie feels Eddie’s belly button ring with the tips of his fingers, while his hands explore Eddie’s upper body.
“Eds… “ Richie murmurs forebodingly, but Eddie ignores him.
He looks back and lifts his arm and cups Richie’s cheek with his right hand, while still dancing against him.
Richie dips his head towards Eddie’s and now their temples are pressed against each other, but Eddie has other plans.
He turns his head and gets dangerously close…Richie faces him with dark lustful eyes and also leans in. Their lips are almost touching…mere millimeters away from becoming a kiss.
Richie can feel Eddie’s peppermint breath ticking his lips, and his heart is racing, pulsating in his ears.
Eddie leans in one more time, but just as Richie closes his eyes, ready to finally kiss his best friend, after years of fruitless flirtations- Eddie pulls away and keeps dancing.
Richie could roundhouse kick Eddie through the fucking wall, he’s so pissed and sexually frustrated.
Then the song changes to Best Part by Daniel Caesar feat H.E.R. and they both kinda just look at each other, unsure of whether to keep dancing or if that would be weird.
But the song is perfect and everything Eddie feels for Richie… so he takes Richie’s hand and pulls him in. He links his arms behind Richie’s neck and Richie wraps him arms around his waist as they begin to slow dance in the dimly lit room.
They had danced like this before when they were kids. Eddie used to stand on Richie’s feet and Richie would lead them. It was cute and adorable, but this was anything but those things.
There was so much tension between them. So many uncertainties and doubts that kept them from each other.
At first Eddie’s head is pressed against Richie’s chest, but then he looks up at Richie through his thick dark lashes and Richie thinks he look absolutely breathtakingly beautiful.
“What are we doing, Eds?” Richie murmurs and sounds emotionally exhausted.
“What have we been doing?” Eddie counters with his own soft spoken question.
Richie looks at Eddie uncertainly as he scans his face. “Dancing?”
“No. Not right now. Before. All along. All these years …” Eddie seems almost sad.
Richie remains silent far too long for Eddie’s preference. He scours his mind for the right thing to say, but “Eds … I … I don’t know,” is all he manages out.
“I think you do know, Rich. I think we both know, but are afraid to say it.”
Richie just looks conflicted and hesitant to say anything.
Eddie decides to be brave. Braver than he’s ever been his entire life. Braver than when he kicked a fucking demon right in his dumb turd face. “Richie, I’ve tried to drop hints. I’ve tried to make my feelings known. I’ve tried to show you how I feel about you, but there is a line that I can’t cross. Not unless you want me to … unless you ask me to.” He’s staring at Richie’s lips now.
“What line?”
Eddie pulls his eyes away from Richie’s lips and loses himself in Richie’s chocolate eyes. “The same line we’ve been teetering on for years- just like we are doing right now, but I can’t do this anymore, Rich. I want more. I need more.”
“Why haven’t you? Crossed the line, I mean. Whats holding you back?” Eddie can feel Richie’s hand quivering against his waist.
“You’ve never talked about your sexuality, Richie. I don’t wanna disrespect you or ruin our friendship, by doing something you dont want.” Tears are beginning to pool on Eddie’s waterline and Richie’s heart is breaking at the sight. “I can’t do anything unless you want me to. You need to ask me to. That is the only way . . .”
Without a word, Richie leans in with his eyes shut and nudges Eddie’s nose with his.
Eddie is so close but feels a billion miles away all at the same time. “Tell me what you want, Richie. All you have to do is tell me.”
“I want you. I want more. I need more of you- all of you!”
That was all Eddie needed, he eagerly closes the torturous gap and finally kisses Richie. After a decade of agonizing pining, excruciating longing, and abortive flirting he finally kissed him. It was magical. Everything Eddie dreamed about and more. He never knew anything could feel like this.
Richie, too, is feeling like fireworks are going off in his chest. He pulls Eddie flush against him and intensifies the kiss. Eddie feels himself lost in it.
When they finally pull apart for air, they gaze at each other with huge smiles.
Eddie embraces Richie as tight as he can and Richie tightens his own arms around Eddie’s waist. They hold each other as tightly for as along as they can.
“What happens now?” Eddie asks into Richie’s ear.
“Be mine. All mine. Only mine.” Richie whispers back.
Eddie pulls away with teary eyes, but an amorous smile. “I always have been.”
They kiss once more, but this time it gets even more passionate.
They are so caught up in the moment that they don’t hear Sonia clomping up the stair and opening the bedrooms door to complain about the volume.
“Eddie! What is this!?”
They boys pull apart with shocked faces. They look towards each other, unsure of what to do or say.
Sonia just glares daggers at them.
Richie whispers to Eddie “Don’t worry, I got this babe.”
Eddie heart skips at the pet name for a quick second, but then he says “Richie, no wait dont-”
“Hey Ms. K. I hate that you had to find out this way but, I’m leaving you for your son.”
Sonia loses her shit, screams, and starts stampeding towards Richie like a bull and Richie pulls off Eddie’s red shorts and begins to taunt Sonia like a matador.
Eddie is all like “Richie! Mom! Stawp!”
Richie keeps evading Sonia with the shorts until he dangles it in front of the window and sonia charges and unintentionally flies out the window.
“MOM!”
“Oh shit… “
They look out the window, certain they were about to see a dead body, but are surprised to see sonia hanging from the tree right outside Eddie’s window, screaming at the top of her lungs.
Luckily her foot got caught on one of the branches and narrowly evaded death.
Eddie and Richie pause but then erupt with laughter.
“Okay can we go back to making out now?” Richie asks
“Richie we need to help her. We need to call 911 or something!”
“Fine, but after you call can we makeout until they get here?”
“Richie! … I thought that would go without saying.  
143 notes · View notes
smooth--criminal · 6 years ago
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OC List!
About The Characters
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Papa Bean / Doctor M
Basics: Mun - They/them or she/her pronouns - age 21 - 5'9” -  demisexual
Personality: A rather emotionally neutral cyborg with a strange sense of humor.
Background: TBA
Misc:
A doctor to all of those present on the blog
Works as Assistant M for Doctor Silverhart
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Regina Loreto
Basics: She/her pronouns - age 33 - 5'2” - aromantic - bicurious
Personality: She’s a narcissistic sadist that loves getting into and causing trouble wherever she goes. There’s no real reason for it, she doesn’t want vengeance on anyone or anything… it’s just good, dishonest fun to her.
Background: She had an average childhood, growing up in a higher middle class neighborhood with her mother and father that, although separated, still shared the home as friends and parents. Despite all the opportunity she was given, Regina went out of her way to start conflicts in school, commit small crimes, and hang out in the more dangerous parts of the city. Thankfully her siblings never followed the same path, as she was abused by some of the men she hung around with, but it didn’t deter her much. She’s worked her way up to be an informant for multiple gangs and criminals, often trading secrets for more secrets, or trading secrets for her life if she gets in trouble. But she hasn’t completely thrown her life away. She works as an assistant to the town’s detective, Jazz, but she works the job just like she works her personal “business.” She works as an informant to the detective and trades information to avoid getting arrested for her hobbies.
Misc:
She’s a dominatrix
She’s inherited her parent’s home because they figured she needed the support more than any of her four siblings
She uses the basement of said home for her sexual ventures as a dominatrix
She likes wearing dresses and has sewn hidden pockets into all of them
One of the things she puts in her pockets is a small pistol
Despite the company she keeps, she does not do drugs and drinks in moderation most of the time
Regina has been pregnant before and has since ensured that she can’t get pregnant ever again with whatever the magic equivalent of getting your tubes tied is.
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Jazz Mullin
Basics: He/him pronouns – age 45 - 5'9" - graysexual - grayromantic
Personality: Death before dishonor. He takes his job as a detective very seriously, in fact, he takes everything seriously. That isn’t to say he doesn’t have a sense of humor or a heart, but he doesn’t let it show much when he’s on the job (except to rescued victims.)
Background: He wasn’t a planned child and his parents were struggling financially for the first few years of his life, but slowly the family recovered until they owned a farm house a bit outside of town. For the sake of preserving all they achieved, however, his parents decided against having another child. His mother was a cop and his dad a college professor for psychology, and he admired the work that both of them did, and sort of ended up putting them together to become a detective It took him awhile to land on detective, but he’d always wanted to help people and now he was. At least, he hoped he still was considering his assistant’s lifestyle.
Misc:
He’s a recovered alcoholic after turning to alcohol when his parents died in a car accident
He loves kids
He also loves dogs
Bro has a lot of soft spots
He also inherited his parents’ home
He’s on the clock even when he isn’t on the clock, playing vigilante sometimes
He’ll probably end up starting a homeless shelter when he retires
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Bobby (Robert) Rosalio
Basics: he/him pronouns - age 26 - 5'11" - pansexual
Personality: He’s a protective, caring guy that tries to convince himself that he’s protective for the wrong reasons. He comes off as gruff and bossy, but he’s a huge emotional sap that just wants to be respected.
Background: Bobby’s family was never well off, but that didn’t stop his parents from having nine kids. He grew up sharing food, clothes, and small spaces with his brothers and sisters, not that they seemed to mind. It was all they knew- that and Catholicism which Bobby has since distanced himself from. He dropped out of high school at the beginning of his sophomore year after retaking his freshman year and decided to get to working instead. He stuck to jobs in restaurants and bars, and is currently working as the owner/bartender of The Falling Star. He’s sharing an apartment with his high school bud, Alex. But ever the mama’s boy, he doesn’t live far from where he grew up.
Misc:
He’s also one of the middle children
Bobby is a hardcore submissive my dudes, and a kinky one at that
He is one of Regina’s “pets.”
He’s a twin, but it’s best not to ask about that
He’s chubby with both fat and muscle. He has thick thighs that can save lives
At one point he wanted to be a chef
He has a cat named Simmons
He’s deathly afraid of driving, but owns a car.
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Alex Triar
Basics: they/them pronouns – age 27 – 5'8” (without ears) – greysexual – androromantic
Personality: Alex is a snarky, sarcastic kid of a bitch. Regardless, their demeanor is pretty laid back and chill and they’re very good at finding the silver lining in any situation. There’s few things that get them riled up. If you do manage to make them angry, however, their usual laid back attitude does not mean you’ll be forgiven easily. Alex is known to hold grudges even long after they’ve gotten over the issue, simply because they don’t want to risk another issue happening.
Background: Alex shares quite a bit in common with Bobby; they come from a poor, religious background and have many (12) siblings. Their parents took the bunny stereotypes a bit too seriously. Alex is the youngest, and has decided to do the minimal amount necessary in their own life and just live vicariously through their siblings. They did finish high school however- even if only for the social scene. And how else were they supposed to get drugs without going out of their way?
Misc:
They were raised vegetarian but have since deviated from it.
They’re very into psychedelics but more often than not they just smoke weed (errday.)
They don’t have a steady job and instead work odd jobs. Sometimes they look to prostitution for cash.
They always have potato chips on them. A L W A Y S.
They keep their sex a secret. The only way you’ll know what’s in their pants is if they let you in them.
They have a strange fascination with fish and have a small aquarium in their room. All of the fish are named after Star Wars characters.
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Vincent Prari
Basics: He/him pronouns - age 28 - 6‘2“ - bisexual
Personality: Vince is a bubbly marine life enthusiast, his life revolving around his job as a marine biologist in one way or another. He’s silly, there’s barely a serious bone in his body.  
Background: As a child he’d nearly drowned during a beach vacation. For a few years he was terrified of the ocean and plagued by thoughts of what could’ve gotten to him if the water in his lungs hadn’t killed him first. His fears pushed him to research, and through research his fears were replace by respect, admiration, and intrigue. He ditched his plans to become a teacher and got a degree in marine biology, moved to the beach, and began anew. His dad was a bit disappointed that there wasn’t going to be another professor in the family, but his parents support him nonetheless! And he visits them whenever he can find someone willing to feed all of his fish.
Misc:
Goes by Vince
He’s a vegetarian.
Nearly every wall in his home is lined with an elaborate fish tank that has become an ecosystem of its own.
He wears contacts to make his pupils wide and more fish-like.
The tattoos on his neck are meant to be gills, his Mohawk a dorsal fin.
He envies fish.
He’s afraid of flying bugs.  
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Naia
(adopted from @devilchicky210)
Basics: She/her pronouns - age 30 - 5’4” -???sexual
Personality: She may be initially cautious and reserved,  but her sassy nature is hard to keep at bay. She’s quick to call out and easy to agitate, but she means well (usually.)
Background: Naia has not a clue where she came from,  but she knows she’s different than other octopi. She grew up in the ocean, every once in awhile coming across other octopi that looked different than her- and seemed awfully afraid of her. Despite not being accepted by the species she identifies as, she is instinctually reluctant to trust land-walkers, especially humans. She has found that she can go on land and be accepted, as many other monsters are, but she still prefers the ocean.
Misc:
Eats but also respects sea-life.
Hates glass/transparent objects
Goes onto land for a drink every now and again.
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Atlas
(adopted from @flargahblargh)
Basics: He/They pronouns - age ??? - 6’5” -???sexual
Personality: He is a quiet giant.
Background: Atlas began as a human living in a small fisherman’s village. He had a wife, two sons, and a daughter. They all lived happily in the routine of the town, spending days fishing and nights enjoying each other’s company. But all of that is gone from him now. Contaminates reached their waters through means still unknown, bringing disease to the village. It was an awful, parasitic virus that ate away at whatever it could, from brain matter to bone. Atlas’s wife was one of the first to go. When his daughter got sick, he ran off to search for help outside of their village. Little did he know that he too was infected, and by the time he knew it was far too late. He was found struggling by Cog, sho could tell based on his state that most of his body would not be salvagable. She took him to the Sweep N Clean, heavily brain damaged by the virus with his body almost literally falling a part and his organs failing. Doc helped rid him of the virus, but only part of his brain and what was left functioning of his body could be saved. With Cog’s help, what remained functioning was assimilated into a robot of sorts to keep him alive. Despite being alive he was in a comotose state for quite some time and was simply monitored in hopes he would awaken. When he did awaken, he was alone with no recollection of who or what he was. In a haze he left the building before he was found awake and has been wandering since, only taking occasional refuge in an abandoned shack by a lake.
Misc:
It is unknown to him whether he is a person in a suit, a cyborg, or an actual robot.
He meditates regularly
He is afraid of needles despite them not being able to penetrate him.
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Di (Dichotomy)
Basics: He/They pronouns - age 21 - 5’10” - panromantic - graysexual
Personality: Di is shy and reserved, but once he gets to know a person he’s more silly and sarcastic. Loves a good dark joke.
Background: Sadly, Di was born in a place where monsters were barely tolerated. They’re forced to live in slums otherwise avoided. Di was left at a Monastery doorstep as a baby by his parents under the impression that he would live a better life under them and be accepted.
His parents were wrong. Di was kept as a supposed “test from God,” a chance for humans to make monsters worthy of Him. This involved harsh punishments and awful living spaces. Di escaped less than a year ago.
Misc:
Di is a lovely singer.
He knows Latin.
His parents were brothers, but he is unaware of this fact, and it plays a part in his features along with his abuse and neglect growing up.
He yearns to be helpful.
He has a dissociative disorder.
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Vani
(adopted from @tehparodypunk
Basics: They/them pronouns - mental age 18 - 5'5 -  Pansexual
Personality: A coy and attention seeking but also shy and sensitive slime that accompanies the mun wherever she goes either as a companion or as her leggings.
Background: Raised after adoption as Doctor M’s Assistant.
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Dimitri James Parker
(adopted from @flargahblargh)
Basics: He/him or they/them pronouns - age 48 - 6'2” - bisexual
Personality: He’s a calm, quiet, focused individual. He’s happy to observe but doesn’t mind contributing to conversations and situations either.
Background:  James was adopted by visible parents and grew up thinking that everyone was invisible to themselves. It wasn't until middle school when people started wearing makeup that it occurred to him that somehow people were applying it. The whole time his parents had been completely unaware that he saw the world this way,  and had to sit down and explain that it was only him and a select few other monsters that were truly invisible,  not everyone. Which also meant that this whole time,  he wasn't visible to others. The fact that he didn’t have a visible form like everyone else threw him into a bit of a existential crisis/depression his late middle school and early high school years. But in his later years he would draw inspiration from just how different the world can seem to every individual person and start getting into detective work,  to discover everyone’s perspective and use it to decipher the truth and bring about justice.
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Clarence [Entry Redacted]
(adopted from @flargahblargh)
Basics: He/him pronouns - age ?? - 5'6” - asexual - aromantic
Personality: The purest of chaotic neutral, he likes to cause trouble because he can. Life is finite, might as well have fun with it! And his idea of fun is quite destructive.
Background: [Entry Redacted]
Misc:
Can summon fire sprites to do his bidding since his arms are restricted.
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