#Loki was well drawn and had some fun expressions

[childofaura]

Between HAKO (Base), Kusakihara Toshiyuki (Brave) and Niji Hayashi (Summer but cheerleader unit), who was the best artist for Marianne?

I think I have to give this one to Kusakihara Toshiyuki:

I remember when that one anon wanted me to roast Kusakihara after my Ryoma Kitada rant, but it bears repeating that Kusakihara’s art is so damn good and deserves no roasting; they made Marianne look absolutely beautiful. The outfit design with all the details, the lighting and shading (especially in the crit portrait where it gets dramatic and features Maurice), the slight muscle tone they added to Marianne. Don’t get me wrong, I love Niji Hayashi too, but B!Marianne was lovely. I don’t know where Kusakihara has gone but I really want them back. I’d have preferred to see how they would have tackled designing the Book 7 characters over Yoshiku.

[lokiinmediasideblog]

If i was in the marvel fandom in 2012 i would've been a major loki hater ngl. I started to warm up in the dark world. I know its controversial but i liked him in Ragnarok but then they killed him in infinity war im sfill mad abt

I like Loki a lot, and I liked him least in Avengers (2012). I watched the movies out of order at first (A1> T:TDW> Thor 1). I enjoyed him a lot in the Avengers, I was drawn to him because he's fun, but he also gave me second-hand embarrassment because he was just so arrogant yet got his ass handed to him(And I didn't know the backstory). I didn't think about Loki for a long time, until I watched T:TDW, where I fell head-over-heels for him. Without Loki, that movie would have felt like watching paint dry, so I felt especially grateful to Loki for that. That eventually got me to finally watch Thor 1. LOL. I enjoyed him in Ragnarok a lot, as well, and shipped him with Valkyrie, but I was not in the MCU fandom at the time (I was in another fandom). I am also still mad about Loki being killed off like that in IW!!!! Let's mourn!

Bear in mind I am biased towards antagonists and villains while reading this. This is my history of how I ended up obsessed with Marvel's Loki. And I am not sure if I should tag this post as "anti Thor" because I mention my extreme dislike of Thor from the past (and reasons). But I mention at the very end he grew on me. It's up to you if you keep reading.

The first time I saw Marvel's Loki, it was on a Hulk v. Thor cartoon on Netflix. Loki looks like an evil DILF in there. And Hela is a hot giant goth lady. I remember I googled norse mythology for the first time because up until then, I had thought "Son of the Mask" made up Loki, and I wanted to learn more about Hela (Hel). And I learned about Sleipnir and how hilarious myth!Loki was.

I found cartoon Thor annoying because he felt too perfect, and that's the kind of character that grates my nerves. And he survived thanks to a kiss from Amora, ugh, that's so dumb. I didn't go to watch Thor (2011) for the longest time because Thor just annoyed me because he felt too perfect and Gary Stu-ish in that cartoon.

And the comics I read at the time, specifically for Loki, made me dislike Thor more because they were like "Thor is the FUCKING BEST! AND ALL THESE SCANTILY CLAD WOMEN WANT TO FUCK HIM. BLEH BLEH. "(I was reading some omnibus by Matt Fraction on readcomicsonline). But I was more of a lurker in fandom, with no tumblr account, so I didn't express it.

And it annoyed me that some Marvel re-tellings of the myths (think it was Ages of Thunder) substituted Loki's cleverness (that saved him in the myths) for Thor being merciful or coming to the rescue. And they'd make Loki not only much eviler, but also dumber than in the myths when scheming and wprd-play is supposed to be his thing. Like, let Loki have something! You don't even have to write it because the myth you're adapting is there already! And ugh. Like no offense to anyone, but I don't really feel bad over Loki being so popular because those comics that existed for 5-6 decades annoyed the fuck out of me.

Also, at the time, a bunch of comic book nerds and dudebros would lose their shit over Loki's popularity. And Loki would be the subject of really fucked up homophobic jokes in parodies (*cough* The Key of Awesome).

Thor started growing on me in Ragnarok, IW (coolest Thor), and EG (EG!Thor is my fave because he's just so sad and I love sad men). And he was actually not Gary Stu-ish in Thor 1, I just didn't appreciate it at the time (unlike in other Marvel media). So I definitely like MCU!Thor way more than in many of his comics runs.

I also feel like I have different Thor and Loki preferences than most of the fandom, because I was a lurker and didn't interact with the fandom until 2022 and then making this blog, thanks to the Loki series bringing back my Loki phase.

[lokislittlesigyn]

You and Me - Loki x Reader [Oneshot]

Part 2 of Sigyn’s Angst-to-Fluff Drabbles

Inspired by Cozy’s Fluff-to-Angst Fun and Games!

Pairing: Loki / Female reader

Warnings: Strong themes of depression and suicidal ideation/a near attempt. Mention of Infinity War and Endgame and all the things that happen there. Fluff awaits at the end.

Author’s Note: A nearly-impossible prompt to turn happy, but I tried my best without taking an easier route like “it was just a dream” etc! I wanted to give it my all. This is the most.. sensitive-topic fic I’ve posted here, so please, skip it or skim it if you need to. <3

@silver-lupines:

Ohohohohoho Loki’s permanent death and the reader is left as a widow. No resurrections.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You still remember it.

You’ll never forget.

Never.

The smell of the air. Thick smoke in your lungs. The colors. The sounds. Death, all around you. Permeating you. You begged for it to end.

He was not so kind.

No, He was not the kind type.

He killed half of every whole. And Loki - Loki had made you feel whole.

What were you now?

You were still a full person, but broken nonetheless. A ghost. Yes, you were a ghost of who you were before. You haunted your own body, desperate for it to stop. Stop aching, stop hurting, stop feeling - let you go, release you to the endlessness of whatever unexistence was, because any unknown it held was surely better than knowing Loki was gone.

You had lived five painfully long years without him. Your husband. The boy you’d known on Asgard, fallen in love with, married and loved and lived through the pain of losing. Twice. 

No, thrice. But the third you had to watch.

You had to watch everything. Leg pinned under the rubble on the Statesman, no more than entertainment for the creatures around you as you screamed at the top of your lungs, unwilling witness to-

You couldn’t bear to think of it.

Sure, you weren’t completely alone. You had your remaining friends: the ones that were not also ripped from you, destroyed for the sake of an asinine plan that made you want to scream and cry and unleash all your anger on the monster who caused it.

You never got the chance.

The others fought. You joined, but you never were close enough to attack The One You Wanted. You were wounded early on. And now He was nothing. No more than dust.

But you felt more despair than comfort.

When the portals had opened, you’d turned, tears pricking your eyes as you scanned them. Loki would be there, you were sure of it. He’d find you. He had to. They knew what he meant to you - they knew to bring him back, too. You pushed through oncoming allies, looking for him. But with every new face you saw only made your heart sink further.

He wasn’t there.

He’d never be there again.

That realization dragged your hope away with it. 

Now you’d made the preparations. Everything was laid out. You even left notes. Your friends would know it was nothing they’d done, because it wasn’t up to them. You didn’t blame anyone that was left. They hadn’t taken Loki from you, that Creature had. And carrying on without him? It was just all too much for you, now - you needed an escape.

But as soon as you closed the door of your room, intent on your next action, someone behind you spoke. With a jolt, you faced them.

“On behalf of the Time Variance Authority, I hereby charge you with crimes against the sacred timeline.”

You went agape. How did they get into your room? Officers of some sort, suddenly standing before you. A glowing orange door pulsated behind them.

This had to be a dream. Yes, you must be dreaming. Your mind was cooking up something bizarre in a last-ditch effort to pull you back to the land of the living. Not that it would matter. The gleaming sword on your bed held promise. You just had to reach it.

“What?!” Was all you could manage. One of the people moved forward, hand outstretched- Now this, this you could do. Life on Asgard trained you for combat. You grabbed them, leveraging your body weight to flip them over. But the other agent swung, hitting you with a baton-

Time stopped.

Or, slowed, to the point that you felt as though you were frozen in place, yet you listened as the one officer brushed themselves off, grumbling about Asgardians, while the one who hit you secured something around your neck. 

“Let’s get her back.”

As you were escorted through the door, you turned and growled in your throat, arm outstretched to grab your sword - but as soon as you were through the door, it closed. 

~~~

The next minutes - hours? - were a blur. You were escorted through a strange place you didn’t recognize - you figured it must be the TVA your captors spoke of, whatever that was - but before you could ask any proper questions, you were tossed into a room. And another room. And another.

In fact, you had been to so many places that were all the same drab beige, and had your clothes removed and replaced with a horrific jumpsuit, you weren’t sure where you were until at last you were taken to a long room, flanked with booths. Down at the end of the room sat someone who was clearly a judge. 

A trial. This was a trial.

So what in Odin’s name were you guilty of?

You were pushed onto a small podium, glaring up at your captor. You’d already tried to escape - but had been overpowered, the collar firmly around your neck offering no chance of liberation.

The woman before you, now clearly visible - or, part of her was, as most of her person was concealed behind the mountain of wood between you. 

She was well-dressed. Professional. Her hair drawn back, her gaze stern. She looked like a leader, and practically radiated power. 

But she was wrong. You were blameless. Why were you here?

“(Y/N) Lokiwife,” The judge spoke, gazing down her nose at you. “Or Leifdottir, if you prefer.”

Your glare didn’t waver.

She cleared her throat.

“You are charged with sequence violation seven-thirty forty-one. How do you plead?”

You sighed. “You must be mistaken. I have done nothing wrong.”

The judge tapped her pen against the paper below her.

“Are you guilty or not guilty?”

“Of a sequence violation, whatever that means? No. No, I am not. I was in my room, minding my own business, when your goons barged in and brought me here.” You clenched your jaw. 

The judge smiled - a forced, strained sort of smile, where her teeth remained hidden behind her lips. You matched her expression with one just the same.

“Those goons, as you call them, were tasked with bringing a criminal,” She pointed the pen at you, “To justice. How. Do you. Plead?”

“Not guilty.” You hissed.

“I highly doubt-”

She was cut off by a new individual running over, whispering into her ear. The judge tensed. You saw her brow furrow, her jaw clench. 

“Thank you.” Her voice was curt.

Silence hung over the courtroom as the other individual left. 

The judge shook her head. “I sentence you as not guilty.” She took her gavel, pounding it in a swift, final motion.

Your breath caught in your chest. “Not guilty?”

“Yes, that’s what I said. Not guilty. I suppose this was all more for formality, anyway;” Renslayer motioned to the trial room and straightened a stack of papers, “You’re merely assurance.”

“Assurance for what exactly?”

“A mission.”

You felt like screaming. Everything was so vague, so mysterious - couldn’t they just let you go? Or else kill you and get it over with?

“Fantastic. Glad to know I can help your cause.” You sneered.

The judge raised a brow, then looked past you. “You’d better be right about this, Mobius.”

“Not to worry, I can handle it from here.” 

A new voice sounded behind you. You whipped around to face it. 

“Woah, hey there.” A man walked toward you, his hands raised. Wearing a suit - much like those you had seen on Midgard, yet somehow different - his short hair streaked silver, a mustache over his crooked-smile lips. Mobius. “I’m not gonna hurt you.”

“What do you want with me?” You glared, not moving from your place.

“Not one to trust easily. I get it. Listen, I’ve got someone you’ll want to see. But you need to trust me now, okay?”

He held his hands out, palms up. You looked at them. Then back at his face. His brows were raised, he seemed hopeful - expectant. You sighed through your nose, and took a wary step toward him.

“That’s better.” He looked at the judge, pointing at her. “I owe you one, Ravonna. I’m telling you - irreplaceable help, you gave today. Irreplaceable!”

The judge rolled her eyes, but a smile played on her lips.

Mobius turned to you. “Shall we?”

~~

Your next journey was far more welcome. Mobius didn’t manhandle you, thank the Norns, though you did sense the eyes of surrounding agents on you. Agents, dressed in the same black armor as those who had fetched you. You stared ahead, avoiding their gaze.

“Where is this place?” Finally, you broke the silence.

“Where, not what?” Mobius answered, smirking.

“This is the TVA, whatever that means. But where is it?”

“You thinking of running away?”

You looked at him.

“Right. Of course you are.. Outside of space and time, if it matters.”

You raised a brow. “And I’m supposed to believe that?”

Mobius exhaled through his lips, chuckling softly. “Ideally, yeah.” The two of you walked through a corridor, apparently intent on a destination you had no idea about.

“Well- Well why am I here?” You stopped in your tracks. Mobius turned to face you, hands in his pockets. You continued, “The judge ruled me not guilty. Said I was assurance - assurance for what?”

“A mission.” Mobius spoke carefully. You narrowed your eyes.

“What?” He asked. “You weren’t exactly busy.”

“Actually, I was in the middle of something.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I was! I don’t want to be here, I don’t want to be anywhere-” You stopped yourself. You felt heat rush to your eyes and nose, but forced yourself to swallow the knot in your throat. You couldn’t, wouldn’t break. Not here. Not in front of countless strangers.

You just wanted to go back to Loki, wherever he was. You didn’t care where.

Mobius watched you. “Come on, I think this will help.”

Giving him a look, you let your shoulders slump, then followed him. Felt your eyes go dull. When you reached a door flanked by two guards, which Mobius quickly dismissed, you straightened up.

Mobius turned to you. “Now, this is going to be a little weird, okay? But bear with me. Just, go with the process, laugh or cry or whatever you need. Got it?”

You stared at him. “I.. What are you even getting at? I told you, I don’t want to be here! I don’t want to be anywhere. I don’t want to be alive, I don’t care if it’s here, or on Earth, or anywhere else, I do not want it-”

Mobius sighed, placed his hand on the small of your back, and urged you into the room, shutting the door behind you. You gasped at the motion and moved to stop the door - but it shut with a resounding thud. Tears betrayed you, streaming down your face. 

“Let me out!” You pounded your fist against the door, “I don’t want to be part of your sick game- Do you understand me? I have nothing to live for, nothing-”

“(Y/N)?” A quivering voice pulled you back to reality.

No, not just any voice.

That voice.

The voice you knew. The voice you missed.

You turned on the spot. Your body froze. There, before you, stood Loki.

“Loki?”

Loki rushed to you. You were frozen, staring up at him. Afraid to touch him. Afraid that if you dared to feel his embrace again he may disappear.

He looked familiar, but not the same as when you last saw him - thank the Norns for that.

No, he looked almost.. Younger? His hair was shorter, not so long nor so wavy as the tresses you remember playing with on the Statesman before He came.

And his clothes. The same as yours: a demeaning jumpsuit. They must’ve put him through all this, too.

What could he possibly be guilty of?

You looked at his face. Your vision, blurry, your body, shaking - you reached for him. He met you. His hand touched your face, cupping your cheek. You felt yourself sob without fully realizing, certainly not controlling it.

He was here. He was alive.

You broke. Melted into his touch, embracing him.

“My love.. Oh, my darling…” His arms enveloped you, his hand sliding to the back of your head, cradling it against his chest.

Your ear pressed to his body, you smiled past your tears, gripping his clothes as though he could disappear at any moment. But you could hear his heartbeat. You savored it, the rhythmic beat, which seemed to steady as you held him in turn. You wanted to stay in this moment forever.

“L-Loki, you.. You were gone,” your voice cracked, “You... He took you from me.”

“I know.” Loki kissed the top of your head, “I know, I saw it all.”

“You - what?”

Loki pulled away, gazing into your eyes, though never letting you go. He swallowed. “I saw it. All of it. My entire life, as it was, apparently, meant to be. I know what you had to endure.”

Tears formed in your eyes again.

“My love, I am so sorry.”

“N-No, I..” You cupped his face, hands stroking his cheeks. One of his hands found yours, and grasped it for him to press a kiss to your knuckles. You smiled. “I have you. You’re back, you’re alive, you…” You huffed a soft laugh and leaned in to kiss him. His lips met yours, and you could feel a tear from his cheek slide onto yours. He broke the kiss, pressing your foreheads together.

“I love you. I missed you terribly. Darling, I can’t express how good it is to see you,” he let himself grin, another tear squeezing out onto his cheek at the movement. He steadied himself, watching you with adoration shining in his eyes.

“I-I missed you too.. Norns, I.. I thought they would kill me or something.. I wished for it.” You swallowed.

Loki’s expression stayed composed, but you saw fear flash in his eyes. Pain. “I heard.”

“I.. I’m sorry-”

“No. You don’t have to apologize for that. It’s not your fault. Neither of us caused the pain we were put through, do you understand? And I am never leaving you again. Never.”

You stared into his eyes. Somehow, the surety with which he spoke seemed… Real.

He wasn’t leaving.

He’d never leave you again.

Silently, you nodded. “And I’ll never leave you.”

He smiled. “I know, my sweet. I know you never will. ”

You remained a moment, until the both of you calmed enough to part - now standing near each other, the tears ceasing. 

You wiped the back of your hand across your cheek. “I can’t believe you’re real,” you joked, weakly, “You’re here.”

Loki smiled, letting out a small chuckle. He gave you another small, loving kiss.

“I’m here.”

[monicashipslokius]

Soulmates, Actually - Pt 2

(Read part one)

Despite their desire to buy Mobius more appropriate clothing as the soulmate of a god, Loki knows they’re not welcome back in Asgard. Not without facing some serious repercussions anyway - none of which they’re willing to subject Mobius to, by association.

So while they temporarily ‘magicked’ themself and Mobius away from the dark streets of that German city to a sunny, hot desert, they aren’t totally sure where to go next. They need a safe harbor, but few would give refuge to the notorious god of mischief. And therefore, again, to Mobius by association.

Some soulmate Loki is turning out to be.

Their displeasure must show on their face, because Mobius clutches their forearm and rubs his thumb back and forth in gentle strokes near the dip of their elbow. Loki closes their eyes a moment, and they take a breath. How such a simple gesture from their soulmate could bring such peace... Truly Loki is the most fortunate being in the universe. Even... even after everything else they’ve been through.

“We cannot stay here,” Loki says, eyes still closed, humiliated by their own incompetence.

“It’s not so bad,” Mobius says, chipper as ever. “I’m a bit overdressed, but...”

Loki opens their eyes again to see Mobius tug at the lapel of his suit. He is already sweating through the shirt underneath.

Humans are such fragile things, in need of such diligent care-taking. Something unpleasant claws at Loki’s ribcage from the inside. A voice whispers in their ear, You are not enough.

“Hey, I got an idea,” Mobius says, squeezing Loki’s arm in excitement. A smile slides easily across his lips. “We could go back to my place. Sure. Yeah. It’s not exactly built for royalty, but... There’s running water and some shade and a fridge with lots of soda pop.”

Loki frowns, confused, though they’re sure they understood most of those words. “...Soda pop?”

“Only the best brands. Yeah, this is great! Okay. Dubuque isn’t going to know what hit them.”

Loki tilts their head. “...Dubuque?”

Mobius nods, cheerful smile never dimming. “Iowa. I was only in Germany for a data analysis conference. Speaking of, I should probably text my coworker and let her know I’m not dead. I don’t want them to start a job search for my replacement yet. I told you how important my job is?”

Loki frowns harder, even as Mobius steps closer. He holds onto their shoulders.

“Dubuque, Iowa, get ready. Here comes the god of mischief and their soulmate!”

*

Loki isn’t sure what they expected Dubuque, Iowa to be like, but the lodgings they teleport into, presumably Mobius’s lodgings, are hopefully not a fair representation of the city as a whole.

“Home sweet home,” Mobius says.

“Is this a closet?” Loki asks, peering around the large single room. A bed is wedged against the far wall under a pair of small windows. To their immediate left, is the semblance of a minuscule kitchen - a sink, a few cabinets, and the promised refrigerator.

“Now, I know it doesn’t seem like much, but this place has everything you could ever need.”

Mobius walks into the living quarters. Three strides and he’s already halfway across the room. He goes to the windows and draws back the sheer curtains. The slightly improved lighting does nothing for Loki’s opinion. The walls, the bedspread, the carpeting - all shades of a light brown that Loki cannot tell is intentionally pale or faded over time.

“Bathroom’s through there,” Mobius says, pointing to a doorway off the corner that doubles as a bedroom.

Loki checks, and finds it lacking. There is not even a bath!

“Are all Midgardian accommodations like this?” Loki asks. They try to keep the disdain from their voice, for Mobius’s sake - but it is precisely for Mobius’s sake that they are so outraged!

“Oh. Well? Nah.” Mobius rubs the back of his neck. “I guess a lot of places are bigger, though it’s important, I think, to be happy with what you have.” He lifts his shoulders, then lets them drop. “Some people don’t have anything.”

Mobius shrugs off his suit jacket and drapes it over the bedspread. The sweat down his back speaks of his fragility once more, and Loki turns away. Mobius said he was valued by his company, but if that were true...

“Do all top data analysts have similar accommodations?” Loki asks. They’re still holding the scepter. Looking around, they see another door - a cloak closet? Loki draws open the door, and yes! Coats and shirts stuff the narrow space. Shoes are lined neatly across the floor. Loki tucks the scepter into the back, behind the clothes.

“The company pays me pretty well, actually,” Mobius says. “It’s just that... uh. How do I put this?”

Loki closes the door and turns toward Mobius, who has unbuttoned his shirt cuffs, and is rolling the sleeves up to his elbows.

Mobius looks up to the ceiling, then at the bathroom door. “I had a bigger place for a long while, but a few years ago, I downsized. Lots of people buy big in anticipation of... well. But when they reach a certain age, they start to assume that... I guess I’d given up.”  He waves an arm out. “This place? It's been enough for just me.”

Loki takes a only small step forward, wanting to be at his side but suddenly afraid to, with Mobius’s sudden vulnerability. Loki doesn’t have the best reputation for healing things. Most of their life, they’ve only been good at breaking.

They fight to keep their voice steady as they say, “You didn’t think you would find your soulmate.”

Mobius shakes his head a little, but when he looks up at Loki, the smile that dimmed sparks back to life. “If I’d known I was waiting for a god, I would have kept the mortgage.” He tucks his head down. “This was probably a bad idea, wasn’t it? This can’t be anything like you’re used to.”

“It’s...not. But.” Loki forces themself to take another step, drawn in by the hopeful gleam in Mobius’s eye.

“But?”

Loki thinks back to when they were young, when they spent hours cultivating dreams that didn’t involve domination of the nine realms. Well, not only that. When they laid awake and thought of all the sweet nothings they would say to their soulmate and all the promises they would make. Back when they thought the universe still held some kindness for them.

They take the final step that brings them to Mobius and tells him, “I would like to stay where you are.”

“Even if it’s this closet?”

“It is... cozy.” Loki glances around. “Though I insist we redecorate.”

Mobius’s smile lights up his eyes, and Loki’s breath catches. They cannot remember the last time they made someone smile like that. Genuine. Bright. Happy. 

“So much beige,” Loki says, grinning. “Do you not see the value in a bit more excitement?”

“Trust me,” Mobius says, “I’m starting to.” He glances, ever so slightly, at Loki’s mouth, and Loki has never wanted to kiss anyone as much as they want to kiss this man in this drab apartment.

Loki starts to lean, and for a moment, Mobius does too.

But then Mobius worries his bottom lip between his teeth and steps away instead.

A familiar pang of rejection echos in Loki's chest. Even their own soulmate finds him lacking. They drop their gaze.

"Hey." Mobius touches their face, a finger under their chin, drawing their gaze right back up. "We should go slow, right?" He swallows hard. "I haven't... It's been a long time for me, and with you, I don't want to mess this up."

Loki wants to tell him that he couldn't ruin this, no matter what he did, but that would be a lie. The truth is much more complicated. Their souls are bound together by the cosmos, yes, but unfortunately the cosmos does not provide any training or instruction on how to sustain a lasting relationship.

Loki, themself, hasn't much experience in that matter. They've had their fun, but that was all.

"Is that okay?" Mobius asks, blue eyes like that of a baby fawn. Loki doubts they would deny him anything, ever. But especially not something they also want.

"Yes," Loki says, much softer than intended. They clear their throat and say, stronger, "Of course."

"Great!" That smile returns full-blast, brighter and more scalding than the desert sun. He bounces back a step. "I'm going to go grab a quick shower." He plucks at his shirt. "So sweaty. You okay for a minute?"

Loki shrugs and nods at the same time, as Mobius disappears into the bath-less bathroom. When the door closes behind him, Loki flops backwards onto the beige bed and stares up at the ceiling, flecked with plaster. The mattress sinks pleasantly beneath their weight. Loki thanks the realms that Mobius at least owns a decent bed.

The water turns on in the bathroom, muffled by the door. Mobius begins to sing. Loki hasn't heard the song before but doesn't need to, to know Mobius is singing off-tune and off-rhythm. A particularly bad note draws a startled laugh from Loki.

Loki glances at the door, wishing they could see Mobius's face, knowing he's wearing that infallible smile. A dresser beside the bed blocks their view, and their attention immediately shifts to a series of framed photos atop it. An older photo of a couple - Mobius's parents, presumably, is most prominent on the left. Their severe expressions do not match the tender way they hold the baby in their arms.

Beside that photo, one of a younger Mobius with longer blonde hair and no mustache sitting on a water vehicle, giving a thumbs-up. Loki smiles softly at him, at his beauty, though easily admits to themself that they prefer the Mobius of now - more gray than blonde, and the mustache. Dignified. Handsome. Loki thinks of kissing him again, and exhales. Going slow will be a test of their willpower, but Loki will overcome. For Mobius. For them, together.

The third photo is of a three-story brown building. Mobius's office? Loki rises from the bed to look closer, but - yes. Only a building, with no people in sight. A quick glance around the room proves no more photos. Why would Mobius dedicate one of his few photos to his workplace?

I guess I'd given up.

In the drab monochromatic room, the photo of Mobius on the ocean holds the only splash of color.

In the bathroom, the water turns off, but the singing continues. Loki listens closer, hears now how the chipper tones drop pitch at the end, and in that sound, so near a sigh, they recognize their own sadness.

Loki meets the stern gazes of Mobius's parents in their photo and vows to them, "I will make your son happy again."

The door opens, and Mobius appears, shirtless, a towel around his shoulders, and a pair of gray sweatpants high on his hips.

Loki's usually thunderous brain goes very, very quiet.

Mobius is not chiseled muscle. His shoulders are not particularly wide. He's not tall. But he needn't be any of those things. He is soft, sturdy lines, and stability, and courage, and the most attractive being Loki has ever had the blessing of putting their eyes upon.

Mobius dabs at his wet hair with the end of the towel. "Hey, you found my photos?"

The reminder of the photo of the building is enough to cool Loki's desire, though it still lingers, simmering, in the base of their being.

"Yes." Loki gestures to the offending photo. Mobius sees and drops the towel back to his shoulder.

"That's the office," he says, confirming Loki's suspicions. "It's a nice building, yeah?"

Loki tries not to let their distaste show on their face. Tries, not particularly hard. "Wouldn't you rather have more of your family? Your friends?"

"Oh. Mom and Pop didn't really care much for photos, and they're gone now." He doesn't mention extended family, or any friends - not even the protective work friend who tried to convince him away from Loki on their first meeting. Instead, he gives Loki a sad sort of smile, as big as the others before but so, so different. It doesn't reach his eyes at all.

Sometimes soulmates are very different from each other, practicing a running theory that opposites attract. But more often than not, soulmates share at least one or two very similar traits. Through these traits, they find common ground. Equal footing. A keystone that holds up all the parts of them that are different until they make a bridge.

In Mobius, Loki sees their own loneliness.

"Would you..." Loki pauses, unsure, but the kind curiosity in Mobius's eyes urges them on. "Perhaps we could have a likeness taken of us. To add to your collection."

The light returns to Mobius smile. Loki will fill this entire apartment with photos of them together if it keeps.

"I'd like that, Loki. A lot."

"Good."

Mobius goes to the dresser and pulls open a drawer. He withdraws a gray short-sleeved shirt and pulls it over his head. Then he glances over his shoulder. "You need to borrow something?"

Loki waves their hand and alters their clothing from their princely armor to a silk green sleep-shirt and pants.

"Woah." Mobius looks them up from head to toe and back again. "That's the hottest thing I've ever seen."

Loki laughs again, and this time, they aren't so startled. With Mobius, they are starting to expect it.

Mobius glances at the bed. Loki does too. Then at each other.

"I know, technically here in Iowa, it's maybe too early to go to bed, but I've gotta tell you, after this kinda day, I really need a nap." Mobius rubs the back of his neck. His cheeks tint pink. "But, uh there's only one bed. I don't even have a couch. Oh! I know! I'll sleep on the floor." The man reaches for one of the pillows like he actually intends to remove it.

Loki snatches his wrist. "You will do no such thing."

"Well, I'm not going to have a prince sleep on the floor."

"Mobius," Loki says gently. They bring Mobius's imprisoned hand to their mouth and place a soft kiss to his fingers. This fragile, precious human. "No one is sleeping on the floor."

"Oh." The pink in Mobius's cheeks reddens - a beautiful shade. "What... uh, what about going slow?"

Loki rolls their eyes. "I do not intend on impugning your virtue. I merely wish..." Their nonchalance slips rather suddenly, and their voice fails them. Saying their innermost desires aloud has only ever been used against them. That they nearly did so, so casually, shocks Loki to their core. Careless.

Mobius folds his hand over where Loki is clutching his other one, until Mobius holds Loki's in both of his own. He brings Loki's hand to his own mouth and places a soft kiss to each of their knuckles, one after the next, mustache tickling the back of their palm.

"What do you wish, Loki?" Mobius asks.

With Mobius, Loki wants to be careless. But to do so would be to give him power. And with that power, mortal or not, Mobius could crush them, heart and soul.

"I can tell you what I want?" Mobius says. "And you can tell me if you'd like that too."

"Very well," Loki says, breathless.

Mobius kisses the dip between Loki's fingers and thumb, and says, "I want to hold you. Fall asleep with you in my arms."

Loki's throat goes very dry. Their heart hammers wildly in his chest. They wants that. So much. But... no, surely Mobius will realize that is a terrible idea. He will change his mind at any moment. So Loki forces themself to say, voice hoarse, "I could kill you."

Mobius shrugs. He doesn't deny it, but he also doesn't let go of Loki's hand. "I figure you would have done it by now."

"I could be plotting."

Mobius meets their eyes, but they hold only fondness, no suspicion. "Are you?"

"Maybe."

"Mmhmm." He pulls Loki's hand to his chest. "Are you saying you aren't interested in the cuddling? It's okay to say no."

Loki opens their mouth but they still can't say what they want.

"No worries." Mobius kisses Loki's hand and releases it. "I can still sleep on the floor -"

"You will not sleep on the floor," Loki says, the annoyance at such a thing finally giving them their voice back.

"Okay, okay." Mobius holds their hands up. He laughs as he draws back the covers. He slides into the bed and then moves to the other side, pressing up against where the mattress meets the wall, so that Loki can have the open side, without being boxed in. Loki could run. Mobius would let them.

Loki crawls under the covers.

They lie in bed, side by side, both on their backs but not touching. Loki doesn't know how long they stay there, staring at the ceiling, before Mobius rolls onto their side, away from Loki. It feels wrong - too wrong, and in the quiet, Loki tries again to find the courage to have their wishes exposed.

"Mobius," they whisper. If Mobius is already asleep, then they won't -

"Yeah, Loki?"

Loki swallows down their nerves. Mobius has only proven himself trustworthy. They are soulmates. Soulmates trust. "Mobius, I..."

Mobius rolls onto his back. He turns his head toward Loki and waits. He waits, and waits, and waits. Loki wonders if he would wait forever.

His patience is what finally cracks through the walls Loki built.

"Will you hold me?" Loki asks, and braces for rejection. For mockery. For any offer to be rescinded with a joke.

Instead, Mobius turns toward them and holds open his arms. "Come on."

Loki slides into the open spot against Mobius's chest, and Mobius folds his arms around them.

Loki's whole body relaxes at once, all the tension evaporating. Mobius is warm and sturdy against their back. His breaths are hot on the shell of Loki's ear.

"This okay?" Mobius asks.

Loki nods.

"I got you," Mobius says, holding tighter.

Loki waits a long moment, then two. They half want Mobius to fall asleep so they won't hear when they say, "Don't let go."

"I won't," comes Mobius's quick reply, slurred slightly with sleep. "I won't let you go, Loki."

Loki knows they shouldn't, but... they start to believe. And with that knowledge, that safety, sleep follows.

*

A thunderous knock sounds heavy against the front door, jolting Loki awake.

"Loki?" Mobius asks, rubbing his eye.

“Are you expecting company?” Loki pushes themself upright on the bed, heart racing.

Mobius frowns. “I’m supposed to be in Germany.”

The knocking comes again, louder. So hard the door cracks. Someone on the other side lightly curses, and Loki goes cold. They knows that voice.

Thor.

Here. Now.

“Loki?” Mobius sits upright too, and grips Loki’s shoulders. He’s so fragile, and yet so grounding. His hands are steady. His grip firm. He's as fully awake now as Loki is, and Loki can the concern in his eyes, even in the dark of the room. “Whoever it is, I won’t let them hurt you.”

“Only a fool would make that promise,” Loki says. “It’s my brother on the other side of that door.”

They expect the words to scare Mobius into rescinding his promise of protection, and they steel their heart against the inevitable hurt. You are never enough.

But Mobius does not look afraid. His jaw sets. His brow lowers. If anything, he seems even more determined.

A fool, for sure. Enough to make Loki’s heart swell. And their nerves prickle.

Loki stands, stepping away from the bed. Mobius quickly follows.

Mobius stood against Captain America and Tony Stark, but they were fellow Midgardians. Thor? Thor is of Asgard. Mobius must know he holds no chance against a god.

But he does not seem to care.

“Hide in the bathroom,” Mobius says. “I’ll get rid of him.”

Loki blinks. “Pardon?”

“It will be fine.” Mobius places a hand on the small of Loki's back and gently shoves them towards the tiny bathroom.

“But, Mobius -”

“Listen, Loki. You are my soulmate. Soulmates protect each other.”

“But -” Loki steps into the bathroom, at Mobius’s behest.

Mobius grabs the handle of the door. “He wants to throw you in some Asgardian prison or something, right? That’s not happening.”

“Mobius -”

“I’ll be right back.” Mobius winks, then closes the door, taking Loki’s heart with him.

[darkacademicfrom2021]

The Dark Team (part 12)

<<Previous part Masterlist   Next part>>

(Taglist: @lucywrites02, @louieboo87, @the-departed-potato, @jesuswasnotawhiteman, @idontknow296, @beksib, @spythoschei, @geekwritersworld, @whatafuckingdumbass, @mysticunicorn7 @shadowolf993 @toe-vind-ek-jou @joscelyn02, @t00-pi, @irwxnhugsx)

Warnings: alcohol.

Disclaimer: pic not mine.

After the sun came completely down and the night bathed the city, making the flashing lights of the buildings and cars look like the sky had spat all of its stars, you gathered all your work and called it a day. Thor, Steve and Bucky were able to go through everything you told them to, and everything was in control. You had managed to solve a chaotic situation from the distance, and the pleasant feeling of doing things right gave you the last push to close your laptop and join Peter and Loki.

Opening one of the windows, you let the fresh wind hit your face and unfurrow your brows, releasing all the tensions you had been accumulating all week long. Peter sneaked up from outside the building and hung upside down from the frame. You gasped, forgetting for a brief moment he was sticky and not completely out of his mind.

“Are you joining us, older?”.

“Yes, little. I’m going”, you laughed at the comeback of the nicknames. Standing for older sibling and little sibling Tony had baptized you with, years ago. Loki chuckled.

“You two are the epitome of adorability, sometimes”.

“Oh, we can get worse”, you laughed.

You had ordered some food in, without wanting to ever touch the mess of that kitchen again, and a bottle of wine. Nobody was there, else than you three; might as well have fun. As you waited for dinner to arrive, you decided on a slide presentation night. You gave each other no more than twenty minutes to arrange it all, so the chaos would be absolute and uncontrollable.

Peter presented first, with a long powerpoint ranking things the Avengers did in “vine-vibes” ascending order. You two tried (and failed miserably) to explain to Loki what a vine was and why something would have its vibes without being actually a video.

Loki’s presentation was titled “Seven hundred reasons why you shouldn’t worship the God of Sparkly hands”. There were actually only six reasons; two of them were about mass murders he was about to commit, and most of them talked about annoying things he did as a child. There was an extra one where it was just a white background and tiny letters in the middle saying “he dyes his hair blonde, he’s actually a redhead”.

Your presentation was titled “Seven hundred and one reasons why you should worship me instead”. No need to elaborate. They all differed except for Friday; she clapped with her electronic hands.

Two board games and some chess later, the food had already arrived. Peter was famished and ate more than you could’ve imagined a boy was capable of. He got so full, so quickly, that he instantly got sleepy. Loki could not bite his tongue and had to say “just like a baby”. It did not help that you snorted, and Peter shot his webs at you two; Loki avoided them and you couldn’t, so you ended up stuck to the roof. Peter started to walk to his room, leaving you up there.

“Hey, hey! Don’t leave, I’m still here!”, you called him. But he was gone. What an avenger. Loki chuckled, and raised his hand to free you with magic, and you instantly realized you were six meters away from the floor. “Wait! I’ll fall!!”.

He didn’t stop, and dissolved the net with a simple spell. As you fell down, you closed your eyes and tried to cover your head, knowing you’d have at least a broken bone. Peter has done this before, you knew there was no way to actually leave unharmed. Loki’s arms tightened around your body, avoiding you to fall flat against the floor.

As you looked up, you met his face, closer than ever. Closer than it ever has been. Your heart skipped a beat, and you knew you had to think about something else than the feeling of his chest against yours, his hands in your back, how he was holding you so gently, how he was looking at you so dearly. You knew you had to think about something else; for he could be reading your mind. He surely was. But you couldn’t. You couldn’t stop focusing on his peach lips and how soft his cheeks looked from up close. You couldn’t see anything else than the movement of his Adam’s apple when he swallowed hard, and how his hand trembled a little in your back.

He let you down slowly, still holding eye contact, still with his arms around you. Not the threatening gaze he would hold against everyone else on the compound. Not the lustful gaze he would sometimes draw while stealing some glances at you changing on your suit (he thought you didn’t notice, you certainly did). Not the concentrated gaze he would hold still on his face while reading one of those books he always carried around.

It wasn’t any of those. You had studied them thoroughly, meticulously, every inch of his facial expressions, every inch of his being while he wasn’t aware of your eyes on him. God, how you hated to look at him this way, but how much you couldn’t avoid it. Your brain knew you shouldn’t get attached. You had no chance at all to be with him; he was a God, a criminal, and he’d go back to Asgard. And, foremost, he didn’t feel the same. He had a lover, and his mind was still there, stuck in that person, undeletable.

And, as much as you could have read him like a children’s book the entirety of the past week, right now, you had no clue what those green eyes on you meant. You had no idea why the blush on his cheeks was in there, and why he let out a tiny (the tiniest, ever so subtle) gasp. Parted lips that shone, looked so…

You shook your head, closing your eyes. He didn’t let go of his grip around you, but your feet were already on the floor. You could’ve walked away if you wanted to. And you wanted to, you definitely did not want to stay there, and sink your nose in his neck. You certainly did not want to play with his hair while staring at those pair of emeralds he couldn’t keep away from you. You couldn’t read him. He looked at you in a way you’ve never seen him before. Yet it felt so… right.

No, it wasn’t right. God, what were you thinking?

He pulled away, and the cold breeze from the window surrounded your body. You didn’t realize how much body heat he was warming you with until he left. Or maybe it was your own. Your face was still burning. You visibly cringed at your reaction, and could not play it cool at all. He chuckled, again, and walked to the kitchen.

You didn’t say anything. Your face still burned, and your chest was tight. You haven’t felt like this in a long time, why now? Why in the middle of an important mission? Why just now, that he specifically told you he would not stay, and that once he left he would not come back? Why now, that he was opening a bottle of wine in the kitchen, and pouring it in two glasses?

Opening the balcony’s doors, there were two metal chairs (those with delicate designs, that would usually belong to a grandma’s garden) and a round and tiny glass table, just waiting for you two to sit there. You needed fresh air, so you did, sinking in all the city, the active flashlights of the cars, the minute people running around, or walking.

Two glasses of wine clicked against the glass table, and Loki sat in front of you with his eyes fixed on the city, too. You observed him from the corner of your eye, and he did the same. A subtle smile drew across his tightened lips.

After a glass of wine, a refill and about an hour of small talk, he uncrossed his legs and stretched his arms and back with a yawn. The blush still remained intact on his cheeks, and it couldn’t be because of the wine. If you weren’t drunk, much less him. He looked back at you, and chuckled uncomfortably.

“What?”, he asked.

“What what?”.

“You’re staring”.

“Oh, sorry”.

“No, it’s fine”, he said, and you furrowed your brows. He specified, “I don’t mind. I wonder what you’re thinking while you stare, nothing more”.

“So you’re not reading my mind?”.

“No. You said you didn’t like that”.

“Ah”, you gave your glass of wine one last sip and emptied it. It was such a simple gesture, yet you didn’t expect him to actually have listened. Of course he would, he wasn’t actually as bad as he was portrayed by Stark, or so you have seen so far of him. “I just… I wonder about you”.

“About what?”.

“You’re difficult to read. My job here is mainly knowing how to read people”, you explained, and he nodded. “It’s almost like you’re purposely hiding. Like you’re shifting your microexpressions into whatever they are now, so nobody can see what you actually think or feel”. He let out a short chest laugh. Probably sarcastic, but how would you know.

“Who would actually want to know what goes through my mind?”.

“I do, just told you”.

He looked down and played with the empty glass in between his fingers. It looked small in comparison.

“You don’t want to, believe me”.

“Are you afraid of letting people in?”.

“No, it’s not that”, he said, trying to let you know he didn’t want to talk about it anymore. You ignored it and opened your mouth, but the words died in your tongue as he added, “please, don’t”.

“I wish I knew you better”, you said after a few more minutes of silence. You swore you heard a creaking foot on the stairs, peeping in the conversation. You ignored it; if Loki was to talk to you, he would also say it in front of Peter. Not like you had some sort of special bond, or even friendship. You kind of wished for it, though.

“Why?”. His knitted eyebrows showed how actually curious he was about that. He believed you. He was certain you were telling the truth, but he simply couldn’t put his head around it. Why would anyone want to know me better? What is it about me that you care? And you wished to know the reason, too. If you knew why you were so drawn to him, maybe you could’ve stopped yourself.

“I feel like I’m missing out on something”.

“Something like what?”.

“Something great”.

“There is no greatness in me, it’s all an act”.

“I know it’s all an act”, you said, referring to his whole I’m a God and you’ll kneel before me and I’m superior. “I don't mean that kind of greatness. You’re hiding the wrong things”.

“You’re not missing out on anything”, he insisted, and not for humility, but because he wanted to brush you off. Keep you away from him.

“Don’t you think we could ever get along? Friends, even?”, you pressured. You knew you shouldn’t have, but Loki didn’t take it badly. Instead, he finally looked at you, drawing a sad smile.

“I’m going back to Asgard after the mission. I don’t intend to make new friends”, he said, but a softness in his voice hinted he wasn’t being mean; simply stating the facts. Exactly as it should be.

“Why did you come only for this mission?”, you asked. You actually wanted to ask do you even have friends back there?, but you knew better.

“I owe Stark. I messed up and wanted to fix at least something with him. He’s not taking it too kindly, but I think he understands the intentions”, he explained, sitting back up on his chair and getting his eyes back on the city.

“A peace offering?”.

“More like an apology. Redemption, even”.

“Redemption? Do you see yourself as a villain to him?”.

He didn’t answer right away. Took his time to find the words.

“I wronged. I did things I shouldn’t have”, and then you realized, he wasn’t apologizing for the New York incident. It was personal. You even wondered, maybe… was he…? Was Tony actually the...? No, imposible. “I know helping out on a mission won’t cut it, but if I can at least be a little bit of help to his planet…”.

“May I ask what did you wrong him in?”.

“I tried to take over Midgard once”, he said, and you didn’t believe him.

“If you ask me, it’s not Stark’s place to accept that apology. He doesn’t own the planet, even though he thinks that”.

“Does he?”.

“He acts like such, at least. He has a big ego, but also a big heart. He’s the closest thing I have to a father”.

“I know”, and you weren’t sure what he had said I know to.

The night was kept awake with more small talk you wouldn’t remember the next day. You saw the sun rising from behind the buildings in silence, with a bad aftertaste of wine, takeout food and unspoken words that would stay just like that.

[samwisethewitch]

What does it mean to be pagan? (Paganism 101 Ch. 1)

That’s right, y’all! With Baby Witch Bootcamp officially wrapped, it’s time to jump into our next long term series! I put out a poll on Patreon, and my patrons voted for Paganism 101 as our next series. While not all witches are pagan and not all pagans are witches, there is a lot of overlap between the two groups. Both witchcraft and paganism offer practitioners a sense of freedom, a deeper connection to the world around them, and a greater awareness of their personal power.

I identify both as a witch and as a pagan, and I get a lot of questions about paganism. In this series, we’ll go through the basics: what it means to be pagan, the difference between a neopagan and a reconstructionist, and the role of magic in different pagan traditions. We’ll also talk about some of the most popular modern pagan traditions and how to find the right tradition for you.

Let’s start off by answering the question, “What does pagan actually mean?”

Defining “Pagan”

It’s important to remember that “pagan” is an umbrella term that encompasses a wide range of different faiths. Someone who practices Wicca, for example, will have very different beliefs from someone who practices Hellenismos. These different faiths are linked by a shared history, rather than by shared beliefs or practices.

The word “pagan” comes from the Latin “paganus,” which literally means “area outside of a city” or, to phrase it slightly differently, “countryside.” This adjective was used to describe people and things that were rustic or rural and, over time, came to also have the connotation of being uneducated. Originally, the word had no religious association, and was even used to refer to non-combatants by the Roman military.

From this definition, we can gain some insight into what makes a religion or practice pagan. Pagans feel a kinship with the wild or rural places of the world, and are comfortable waking “off the beaten path.”

But how did “paganus” come to refer to a type of religion, anyway?

To understand the religious meaning of “paganus,” it’s necessary to understand a little bit about the religion of Ancient Rome. Rome (the city) was built inside a pomerium, a sacred boundary that formed a spiritual border around the city and its people. Paganus folks were those who lived outside the pomerium and, as such, may not have been strict adherents of the state religion — they certainly wouldn’t have been able to travel into the city for every major festival. They may have gotten a bit more creative with their worship of the gods. However, as previously stated, the word paganus did not have an explicitly religious meaning in ancient times.

The use of paganus as a religious label began after the legalization of Christianity by the Roman Emperor Constantine in 313 C.E. Christianity would not be adopted as the official state religion until 380 C.E., but Constantine’s conversion and decriminalization of Christian worship paved the way for Rome’s transformation into a Christian state. It was around this time, as Christianity was quickly growing in urban areas, that early Roman Christians began using the word “paganus” to refer to those who still practiced polytheism. Rather than referring to those outside the city’s boundary or to untrained civilians, the label now referred to those outside the Church, those who were not “soldiers of Christ.”

As Christianity spread in popularity throughout the Mediterranean, Europe, and Northern Africa, the pagan label was applied to all non-Christians in those areas. The word “pagan” became a derogatory label, implying an inferior and backwards religion.

So, really, the thing that makes a religion pagan is a historical conflict with Christianity. Pagan religions are those that were suppressed or completely destroyed after Christianity became the dominant faith in the region.

This is why Norse Paganism and Kemetic (Egyptian) polytheism, which are very different, are both considered “pagan” while Shinto, a Japanese religion that shares a lot of common features with many pagan faiths, is not. Because Christianity never achieved total dominance in Japan, Shinto was never pushed aside to make room for Jesus.

In the 20th century, people who felt drawn to these old religions started to reclaim the pagan label. Like many other reclaimed slurs, “pagan” became a positive label for a community united by their shared history.

What do all pagans have in common?

This is a tough question to answer because, as stated above, paganism is a historical definition, not one shaped by belief or practice. However, there are some things most pagans have in common. Here are a few of them, although these concepts may take different forms in different traditions.

Paganism…

… is (usually) polytheistic. Most pagans do not subscribe to monotheism, the belief in a single, all-powerful divine being. Some pagans are polytheists, meaning they believe in multiple divine beings with varying levels of power. Hellenic pagans, Norse pagans, and Celtic pagans are typically polytheists. Still others are monists, meaning they believe in a single divine source that manifests itself as multiple gods. Wiccans and other neopagans are typically monists. Many pagans fall somewhere in-between strict polytheism and strict monism. We’ll talk more about polytheism in a future post, but for now just know that the idea of a single, supreme creator is not compatible with most forms of paganism.

… is based in reciprocity. This is a concept that may seem odd to those who grew up around Abrahamic religions: the idea of engaging the gods in a mutually beneficial partnership, rather than one-sided worship. When we connect with the gods, we receive spiritual, emotional, and physical blessings. The gods also benefit, as they are strengthened by our prayers and offerings. (I like to think they also enjoy the company. It has to be lonely, having your body of worshipers supplanted by an anarchist carpenter from Palestine.) The concept of reciprocity is why most pagans make physical offerings to their gods.

Reciprocity also extends to our relationships with other people. Most pagan religions have a code of ethics that includes values like hospitality, kindness, and/or fairness with others. Depending on the pagan, reciprocity may even extend to the dead! Many (but not all) pagans practice ancestor worship, the act of honoring and venerating the beloved dead.

Reciprocity may even extend to the world at large. Some (but not all) pagans are animists, which means they believe that every animal, plant, and stone contains its own spirit. Animist pagans strive to live in harmony with the spirits of the world around them, and may make offerings to these spirits as a sign of friendship.

… embraces the Divine Feminine. Paganism acknowledges and venerates both masculine and feminine expressions of divinity. Polytheist pagans worship both gods and goddesses, while monist pagans see the divine Source as encompassing all genders. In either case, the end result is the same: pagans acknowledge that, sometimes, God is a woman. (Cue the Ariana Grande song.)

Paganism also acknowledges gender expressions outside the masculine/feminine binary. Many pagan deities, like Loki (in Norse paganism), Atum (in Kemetic paganism), and Aphroditus (a masculine aspect of the Greek Aphordite) exist somewhere in the grey area between man and woman.

… is compatible with a mystic mindset. Remember how I said there’s a lot of overlap between witchcraft and paganism? Part of the reason for that is because paganism is highly compatible with magic and other mystical practices. Most pagans believe that humans have, or can attain, some level of divine power. It makes sense that this power would manifest as magic, or as other spiritual abilities. Many of the ancient cultures modern paganism draws inspiration from practiced magic in some form, so it follows that modern pagans would as well.

… draws inspiration from the ancient stories. As we discussed, “pagan” originally referred to the religious groups that were pushed out by Christian hegemony. As a result, every modern pagan is a little bit of a historian. Because paganism was pushed underground, it takes a little digging to find myths, rituals, and prayers that can be used or adapted for modern practice.

Many pagans worship historic deities that you’ve probably read about at some point. Visit any pagan pride event, and you’ll probably find worshipers of Zeus, Venus, Thor, and Isis, just to name a few. Studying and interpreting ancient mythology and archaeological evidence is a big part of modern paganism.

… is a religion with homework. If you’ve read this far, you may be beginning to realize that being pagan is a lot of work. It’s fun, spiritually fulfilling, and very rewarding work, but work all the same. Because very few modern pagans have access to temples, priests and priestesses, or an in-person community that shares their beliefs, they end up having to teach themselves, do their own research, and guide their own practice.

This is incredibly empowering, as it means you are your own religious authority. It does, however, mean that you will occasionally have to open a book or slog through a dense academic article about the most recent archaeological find related to your favorite deity. Thankfully, there’s a growing number of accessible, beginner-friendly books, blogs, podcasts, and YouTube channels to help you in your research.

… embodies a deep respect for the natural world. While not all pagans are animists, most pagans do feel some sort of reverence for the forces of nature. Many pagan deities are associated with natural forces or use the natural world to communicate with their followers. Because of this, not only do pagans respect and love nature, but they’re constantly watching it for signs and messages. (Are you really friends with a pagan if they haven’t called you crying because they found a crow feather on the ground or saw a woodpecker in their backyard?)

Some pagan groups, especially neopagan religions like Wicca, have been classified as Earth-centered religions. Personally, I dislike this term. While it is true that many pagans feel a deep spiritual connection to the Earth and may even venerate local nature spirits, to say that these religions are “Earth-centered” feels like an oversimplification. Wiccans, for example, don’t actually worship nature — they worship the God and Goddess, who they see reflected in the natural world.

… is driven by individual spiritual practice. As mentioned above, very few pagans have access to an in-person community. Because of this, modern paganism largely consists of individual practices. Even pagans who do belong to a community still typically worship on their own sometimes. These personal practices may involve prayer, offerings to the gods, meditation, divination, astral travel, performing religious rituals, or countless other practices. Many pagans have personal altars in their homes, where they worship alone or with their family.

… is a celebration of daily life. One thing I love about paganism is how it makes every aspect of my life feel sacred. Many religions emphasize the spiritual aspects of life while deemphasizing, or even demonizing, the physical or mundane aspects. This can lead to practitioners feeling like they are spiritual beings trapped in a physical body, or like their physical needs and desires are something to escape.

Paganism allows practitioners to fully enjoy being physical and spiritual beings. Pagans reach for the heights of spiritual awareness, while also enjoying earthly delights — recognizing that neither is inherently more worthy than the other and that both are needed for a balanced life.

… is only one of many paths to Truth. Most pagan groups do not claim to be the only valid religious path, and in fact several openly acknowledge the validity of other religions. This is why you rarely see pagans trying to convert other people to paganism — it’s openly acknowledged that paganism isn’t for everyone, and that those who are truly meant to practice the old ways will find them.

~~~

Hopefully, this post has given us a good working definition of “paganism.” From here, we’ll explore some of these individual concepts in more depth and discuss specific religions within the pagan umbrella. Until then, blessed be.

Resources:

Wicca for Beginners by Thea Sabin

Wicca: A Guide for the Solitary Practitioner by Scott Cunningham

A Witches’ Bible by Janet and Stewart Farrar

The Way of Fire and Ice by Ryan Smith

Where the Hawthorn Grows by Morgan Daimler

Temple of the Cosmos by Jeremy Naydler

A Practical Guide to Irish Spirituality by Lora O’Brien

[swan-of-sunrise]

Spellbinding (Chapter Two)

Summary: Loki and (Y/N)’s friendship continues to grow but is soon threatened by a dangerous enemy and a life-changing secret.

Pairing: Loki X Reader

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings/Disclaimers: Brief scene of verbal harassment

A/N: Hope you all enjoy!

Chapter Two April 14th, 2015 Avengers Tower, New York City (Previous Chapter)

As Loki walked down the hall to the conference room, he thought about how he’d much rather be in his room or the library reading his new book. (Y/N) had picked Pride and Prejudice for him the last time he visited the library, insisting that he’d love the witty banter between Elizabeth Bennet and Mister Darcy. She had proven to be right yet again; Loki could honestly say that Jane Austen was indeed a very clever woman and that (Y/N) had a true talent for recommending literature.

His thoughts drifted back to the first time he’d laid eyes on the trainee librarian almost two months ago. After complaining to Tony about the inadequate number of interesting books in his library, Steve had interrupted whatever insult the billionaire was about to utter and told Loki about public libraries, specifically the New York Public Library several blocks down the street from the tower. Needless to say, Loki was hesitant to visit; the super soldier was one of the only Avengers he could actually stand to be around most of the time, but he had a nasty habit of overlooking the more annoying traits of Midgardians. But in utter desperation for any interesting reading material, he finally caved and walked down the street to the library, feeling utterly ridiculous in the Midgardian clothes the others had purchased for him. However, his discomfort vanished the moment he stepped into the library; unlike the bustling street outside, the building was practically empty, and it was packed to the brim with enormous bookshelves.

In a trance, he strolled down the aisles and couldn’t help but marvel at the sheer number of books the Midgardians had written; it almost rivaled the palace library on Asgard. But when he turned down another aisle, he stopped cold in his tracks; standing mere feet away and busy placing books onto one of the shelves was a woman, and she was the fairest he’d ever laid eyes on. Her (Y/H/C) hair was streaked with faint strands of gold, and her (Y/E/C) eyes glimmered behind a pair of glasses that rested on her nose; he smiled a little when she had to push them back up after they had slid down. Her clothing was simple and modest, a pair of dark jeans and a light purple sweater with a pair of flats, but their plain-ness only served to accentuate her beautiful features.

When she placed a book on the shelf, she smiled brightly and looked up, but whatever she noticed made her frown. A look of determination came across her features and she reached for the top shelf, but it was far too high for her. Instead of giving up, she stood on her toes to give her more height, but as a result, she lost her balance and stumbled. Breaking out of his trance, Loki rushed forward and grabbed her elbows to catch her from falling. The moment her striking (Y/E/C) eyes met his, his face reddened, his heartbeat quickened and he decided that Midgardian public libraries weren’t all that bad. The woman had introduced herself as (Y/N), and after helping her finish her task of rearranging the bookshelf, he was recommended A Midsummer Night’s Dream and given a library card. He was quickly charmed by how enthusiastic she was about the play and he decided that a return trip to the library would be quite necessary.

And that’s how their friendship began. Every Friday, he would visit the library, discuss with her whichever novel or play he’d just read and leave with a new one. She had insights on each and every one, offering him explanations of plot or speculations of characterization, even background information on the author or the period it was set in, and he listened to her intently before adding his own views and opinions to the conversation. She was kind and intelligent for a Midgardian, and he quickly found himself looking forward to their weekly meetings. He couldn’t deny that another reason he was drawn to her was because she didn’t look at him with fear or hatred in her eyes. To her, he was simply a friend who enjoyed discussing literature with her every Friday, not the villainous Asgardian who previously tried to take over her planet. For some strange reason, she had yet to realize his true identity, which was why he had continued bend the truth and tell her that he was just a civilian consultant and not one of ‘Earth’s Mightiest Heroes’. There was one Friday, however, when he seriously questioned whether he should tell her the truth or not…

Loki hurried up the steps of the library, humming an Asgardian tune under his breath as he climbed. The week had been a long and trying one; Director Fury had announced that they were planning on infiltrating several Hydra databases, Thor had broken nearly all the kitchen appliances with Mjolnir out of frustration after attempting to cook and on top of everything, Loki was forced to go on a mission with Tony, the most infuriating Midgardian he’d ever met. So, to say that he was excited to see his new friend was an understatement; he missed seeing her wonderful (Y/E/C) eyes sparkle as they looked at him, her bright smile as she spoke so passionately about literature, her infectious laughter whenever he told her a joke…though he would never admit it out loud, he was slowly beginning to develop a soft spot for the kind trainee librarian. And although he worried about how she would react to learning his true identity, he believed deep down that she was different from other Midgardians but the only way to be sure of her reaction was to go ahead and tell her about himself. He entered the library, his mind already made up, and headed towards the bookshelves to look for her when he noticed she wasn’t sitting at her desk. As he was leaving the biography section, two voices made him stop in his tracks.

“Aw, c’mon sweetie, just one date!”

“I already told you, sir, no thank you.”

Loki peeked around the bookcase and saw (Y/N), her back to him as she shelved books and shied away from a handsome but shifty-looking man standing too close to her and staring hungrily. Rage filled him but just as he was about to step in, the man spoke again.

“I’ll treat you to a real nice meal, and maybe after we could have a little fun; I’m the best you’ll ever have, sweet cheeks. C’mon, are you sayin’ no ‘cause I’m ugly or somethin’?”

(Y/N) looked at him with a mock expression of confusion. “Facially, or are we talking about your personality? I’m confused so you’ll have to clarify yourself for me.” Loki smirked to himself, amused at her witty comeback. “Now, I suggest that you check out a book to expand that non-existent brain of yours and leave before I call the police and have them teach you all about manners as they arrest you for stalking all the female employees here.”

The man’s jaw clenched in anger. “Wouldn’t wanna go out with a bitch like you anyways.” He stormed off down the aisle and she resumed her work.

Careful not to be seen by (Y/N), Loki gritted his teeth and followed the man as he entered the men’s restroom. He tapped the man’s shoulder and when he turned around, punched him square in the jaw. The man toppled to the floor, clutching his face and moaning. Grabbing him tightly by the throat, Loki lifted him up easily and slammed him hard against the wall, causing the tiles behind him to crack. “If I ever hear of you returning to this library or harassing that woman again, I will not hesitate in tracking you down and disemboweling you.” To prove his point, he allowed his eyes to flash Jotun-red before returning to their usual green. “Understand?” Instead of answering, the terrified man’s eyes rolled back and he fainted. “Insignificant ant.” Loki threw him back to the ground roughly and left the restroom to search for (Y/N). She had moved on to the sciences, her usual gentle smile on her face as she worked. “Lady (Y/N)!”

She turned to him and her smile widened. “Hi Loki! You’re late, you know. I almost thought you weren’t going to come in today.”

Loki only grinned. “What, and miss our weekly talk? Unthinkable!” She laughed and continued shelving. “I…I actually arrived several minutes ago and witnessed you dealing with that pig. You have an astounding talent for witty insults, Lady (Y/N), I’m impressed.”

“Thank you, I’ve learned over the years that they’re the quickest way to make men like him go away.”

He felt his knees weaken when she grinned at him, attracted to the mischievous glint in her usually innocent eyes. His eyebrows furrowed, however, as he considered her relaxed demeanor. “If you don’t mind me asking, how is it that you stay so positive after being harassed and insulted like that? Does it not bother you?”

(Y/N) thought for a moment before responding. “Well…when I was little, my aunt used to always tell me this one quote from Eleanor Roosevelt; it goes something like ‘No one can make you feel inferior without your consent’. So, whenever someone tries to put me down like that man just did, I think of that quote and try to remember that life’s too short to let people believe that they can control me.” Pushing her glasses up her nose, she directed her attention to the book in his hand. “So, did you enjoy the book?”

“Hmm? Oh, yes, very much!” Loki exclaimed, hoping that she wouldn’t notice how he stared at her. “Although, I’m not sure Tolkien needed to spend five pages describing a forest.”

She laughed again. “That’s one of the most common criticisms of Tolkien, you know. But you have to admit, his descriptions…” She continued talking, but Loki was only half-listening. She had surprised him with her answer to his question, and as he watched her talk animatedly about the merits of over-describing action and locations in novels, he knew that he couldn’t bring himself to tell her about his true identity. Not just because of how she would possibly react, but because it would almost certainly put her in danger. And he couldn’t purposefully put the most kindhearted woman he’d ever met in harm’s way, not for anything. With his mind made up, he just watched and listened to her speak with rapt attention and barely-concealed admiration.

“Loki!” He was drawn out of his thoughts by his brother, who hurried to walk alongside him. “I called to you several times, is there something on your mind that’s making you hard of hearing?”

“Nothing at all, brother, except the desire to return to my room and finish my book,” Loki snapped back. Although he’d never admit it out loud, Loki was happy that his relationship with Thor was different now that he wasn’t living in his brother’s shadow. The Avengers had allowed him to join their team to redeem himself and in turn he’d slowly earned their trust, finally making him feel just as respected as Thor for once in his life. And I suppose it’s rather nice to have a brother again, he thought begrudgingly, although he can still be as infuriating as ever.

Thor only chuckled. “Are you sure that’s the only thing on your mind?” When Loki shot him a questioning look, Thor grinned. “I know that you’re thinking about your Lady (Y/N). When do I finally get to meet the woman who’s enchanted my brother?”

Groaning, Loki pinched the bridge of his nose with his fingers and avoided his brother’s eyes. “I deeply regret telling you about her, you know. As I’ve said before, she and I are merely friends, Thor, nothing more. We have intellectual discussions about literature, something you could partake in and benefit from if you ever picked up a book in your life.”

“Whatever you say, Loki,” Still chuckling, Thor led them into the conference room and they took their seats at the table. The only other Avenger there was Steve since the rest of the team was on various missions or conducting experiments in the lab. “Did Fury mention why he’s called us here, Rogers?”

Steve shook his head, his arms crossed over his broad chest and a worried look on his face. “Nope, he didn’t say anything. His text sounded pretty serious, though.” They all seemed to have thought the same thing given that they were all dressed for battle; Thor and Loki in their Asgardian armor and Steve in his red, white and blue uniform complete with his vibranium shield.

Before Loki could speak, the director walked in with files in his hands. “Okay, now that everyone’s here we can begin. The three of you are gonna go on an extraction mission here in the city. As you know, our intelligence uncovered some Hydra files recently and they include one of their next targets. This is a sensitive one ‘cause we don’t know exactly when they’re gonna make their move, but we do know it’ll be today so you’ll need to leave immediately.” Director Fury handed each of them a file and continued. “And because we’re on a tight schedule, we don’t know why they’re targeting her yet but we’ll be working on finding out the answer to that question while you’re gone.”

Loki took the file and opened it, but as soon as he saw the woman’s picture, he froze. It was (Y/N), and the photograph was taken from her library identification card she usually wore clipped to her belt. “I believe I may know why she’s being targeted.” When the rest of the group looked at him with confusion, he continued, “This woman is Lady (Y/N), my friend who works at the library down the street. I meet her there every Friday afternoon.”

“Let’s go.” Steve stood quickly and everyone else followed. “I’ll meet you two there.” Slinging his shield over his back, he jogged to the elevators that led to the entrance floor below.

Fear clenched at Loki’s heart as he and Thor hurried up the tower’s emergency stairwell to the protruding helipad; he never intended (Y/N) to become a target of Hydra and had taken every precautionary measure to ensure her safety. He’d never forgive himself if something happened to her because of him. “The library is west of the tower and three blocks down. I’ll go in first and meet you behind the building with her, all right?”

Thor nodded, a determined look on his face as he kicked open the door to the helipad. “No harm will come to her, brother, I promise.”

Without another word, Loki grabbed his brother’s arm as he swung his hammer and they shot into the air. Moments later, they landed in the alley alongside the library. Please let her be safe, he thought as he ran around the building and dashed up the front steps. Loki swiftly entered the building, ignoring all the strange looks he received because of his armor, and hurried over to the bookshelves. (Y/N) was in the philosophy section, so engrossed in her shelving that she didn’t notice him approach her. “Lady (Y/N)!”

She looked up from her cart and smiled. “Loki! Why are you wearing-?”

“Lady (Y/N),” He interrupted. “This is going to sound completely insane, but any moment now, some very dangerous men will come here and attempt to abduct you.” When she was about to interrupt, he held her shoulders and bent down so that he was eye-level with her. “This isn’t a joke, Lady (Y/N), I assure you, and I promise I’ll explain everything to you later, but we need to leave now. Do you trust me?”

(Y/N)’s widened eyes considered his for a moment before she slowly nodded. “Y-yes, Loki, I trust you.”

“All right, we need to get to the-” Before he could finish, the library door’s slammed open and they could hear what sounded like a several armed men enter as the rest of the patrons screamed and took cover. He cursed under his breath. “We need to hurry; is there another way out of here?”

“This way!” Snapping out of her shock, (Y/N) quickly led him through the rows of bookcases to a door at the back of the room, but before they could go through, they were suddenly surrounded by eight Hydra agents. The sight of the men pointing their guns in (Y/N)’s direction filled Loki with a rage unlike any he’d ever felt before; the only thing keeping him from slaughtering them where they stood was the woman standing beside him. As (Y/N) gasped in fear, Loki stepped in front of her and thrust out his hands, causing their guns to melt in their hands and transform into snakes; attention was drawn from the two of them as the men fell into a panic and attempted to untangle the serpents from their arms.

A moment later, Steve jumped into the middle of the fighting and slammed his shield into one man’s face. “Loki, get her out of here, I’ve got this!” He skillfully dodged an attack and threw his shield, knocking two of the men into unconsciousness before flying back onto his left arm.

Giving the super soldier a nod, Loki took (Y/N)’s hand and quickly led her through the door, which opened into a long hallway. “Watch out!”

He spun around as an armed man came sprinting towards them down the hallway, already pulling a gun out of its holster as he ran. Before he could raise his hand and use his magic or daggers to defend them, (Y/N) raised her own hands and the man was suddenly slammed against the wall by a purple force and knocked unconscious. Loki looked at her in shock, an emotion which was mirrored on her face as well. She looked down at her trembling hands and back up at him before her knees buckled and her eyes rolled back in her head; Loki lunged forward and caught her in his arms before her limp body could hit the floor. She doesn’t know she possesses magic, he thought in astonishment. Cradling her protectively in his arms, he hurried down the hall and kicked a door open with his foot, revealing the alley where his brother was waiting impatiently beside a cluster of unconscious Hydra agents.

“Is she all right?” Thor asked, but all Loki could do was give him a hopeless look. “I’ll take her back to the tower to Banner, you stay here and help Rogers.” Loki opened his mouth to protest, but Thor interrupted. “She’ll be safe with me, Loki, but Rogers needs assistance!”

Giving his brother a curt nod, he carefully placed (Y/N)’s unconscious form into Thor’s arms. “Take care of her, Thor.” He watched as Thor swung Mjolnir and shot into the sky, flying towards the Avengers tower with (Y/N) secure in his arms. The moment they left his vision, he hurried back inside and helped Steve defeat the men and the reinforcements they brought along. All he could think of while he fought, however, was (Y/N)’s sickly face, the incredible power she used to protect him and the fact that she seemed to have no knowledge of that power. He had a nagging suspicion about what that power meant, but he prayed to the Norns he was wrong; if he wasn’t, then it meant that (Y/N)’s world was about to be turned upside down.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

A/N: Thank you for reading! I’ve created a Spotify playlist inspired by this series, and I’ll be updating it every time I upload a new chapter. Enjoy! 

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2wx8TZwpDN0l33tES3W3Nk

Chapter Three-Part One

Spellbinding Masterlist

Tagging: @nexiva @ravenclawbitch426 @cminr @confusedfandomwriter @momc95 @nickkie1129 @austynparksandpizza @brooke0297 @destructivebliss @outoftheregular​ @itscomplicatedx​ @0-artemis​ @vivloki​

[just-fandomthings]

For the kiss writing prompt 💕 frostiron + 29. "...as a promise"

Read on AO3 (Post Avengers, 2012)

...as a promise. 

“During my invasion, why did you offer me a drink? You were trying to stall, I’m aware, but why was that the method you chose?”

Stark startles, dropping the gauntlet he’s working on. “What the hell, warn a guy before you appear like that, would you? I’ve got a heart condition.”

“Apologies,” Loki says honestly. “I would have thought you were expecting me; JARVIS told me you agreed I could come down.”

“Yeah, I said you could, but I wasn’t expecting you to be here thirty seconds later. Doesn't matter, I heard you say ‘drink’, are you here to finally collect on my offer?”

“Sir, Loki asked permission to join you ten minutes ago,” JARVIS inputs.

Stark blinks. “Oh. Guess I lost track of time. So, what was your question?”

Loki clears his throat. “I was wondering why you offered me a drink in your tower when you first came to threaten me.”

Stark gives him a strange look. “Well, I needed the bracelets behind the bar so I’d have a suit in case we fought- or, in your case, if you decided to throw me out a window.”

The words are said lightly but Loki still grimaces. “That doesn’t explain why you offered me the drink,” he points out after a moment.

“Why not? I needed to get my bracelets and was planning to pour myself a drink to keep you distracted, so I offered you one too. I’m not sure what answer you’re looking for here.”

“I was not your guest, you owed me nothing. I was your enemy who had just killed your friend- you should have left your armor on when you came inside, instead of selecting a new armor to don.”

“The other one was damaged,” Stark says. “Needed the upgrade- besides, do I have to remind you that was my tower you were using as home base? JARVIS had my back the entire time.”

“Indeed I did,” JARVIS agrees.

“Is this you trying to tell me I’m reckless?” Stark squints at him. “Trying to tell me not to take on an enemy in battle when I’m out of armor or something? Because I gotta tell you, out of everyone on this team except maybe Bruce, I was expecting you to understand that I am more than just-“

“No, that’s not it,” Loki interrupts quickly. “Well, I would rather you not die since you are the least annoying person on this team I’ve been forced on, but I know that you are more than well-equipped to handle any difficult situation with no more than the clothes you are wearing.”

“Thank you, I don’t know why people always assume I’m helpless outside of my armor. And right answer, by the way, I was gonna stick Dum-E on you with the fire extinguisher if you were trying to pull a Cap on me. So, what’s with the third degree, what’re you trying to figure out?”

“I suppose, I am trying to ask why you were polite to me,” Loki mutters. “You did cleverly insult my manhood not a mere minute later, but you saw me in your building, in your home, and your response was to offer me a drink. You certainly weren’t expecting me to accept and talk with you, so why offer it?”

“Uh, common courtesy? Because I wanted to?” Stark frowns at him. “Either of those, both of them really, have your pick. I really don’t see what the big deal is, you know. It‘s not like I had time to stop and think everything through beforehand, so I just did it. And either way, I was going to get a drink as a stalling tactic so I could get to my armor, so why not offer you one too? You haven’t even taken me up on it in the three months you’ve been here, by the way, what's up with that? I thought you would have, to be honest.”

Loki is quiet for a moment. “May I do so later this evening?”

“Seriously?” At Stark’s incredulous inflection, Loki bristles, about to take it back, insult him, and storm out, but Stark surprises him by agreeing, “About time you took me up on my offer! I’m game, but I need to finish this upgrade first. Is my penthouse at eight-thirty alright, maybe later?”

“It’s not as if I will be busy with nefarious plans at that hour,” Loki huffs. “Yes, that is fine.”

Stark grins. “It’s a date then.”

The first two minutes of their conversation is stilted and awkward, with neither of them apparently knowing what to say. It lasts until Stark glances at him, drains the rest of his glass of scotch and goes, “Oh what the hell, I’m going for it. Please don’t smite me for this, okay, because I know you’ve gotten defensive every time someone has asked, but I really want to know about your Seiðr. How you learned it- I’m assuming you were taught- what the scope of your abilities is, and mainly, how it works. From one genius to another, can you please give me some answers?”

Loki blinks, retort dying on his lips. “You truly wish to know?”

“Uh, why would I not? It's probably the most powerful and complex thing I’ve ever come across- which hurts to admit- and I know nothing about it, which sucks, by the way. I hate not knowing things, especially things that interest me.”

“And my Seiðr interests you?”

“Yeah, thought I’d made that pretty obvious by now. I mean, Cap told me off for practically drooling during that battle last week when you eviscerated those doombots. I would have paid good money to see Doom’s face when he saw you literally rip his bots apart with just a wave of your hand.”

“That is but a simple trick,” Loki murmurs. “You are truly fascinated by my Seiðr, aren’t you?”

Stark’s gaze is expressive and searching for a moment before he nods. “It’s probably the coolest thing I’ve ever seen, and I don’t say that lightly.”

Loki exhales slowly. He thinks Stark might just be genuine. “What do you want to know first?”

It takes only an hour of discussion for them to rearrange the furniture of the penthouse against the wall to give them an open floor space so Loki can show off his Seiðr. Stark keeps up with his conversations remarkably well for a mortal, far surpassing Loki’s expectations, and he finds himself relaxing, indulging in discussion of the more technical aspects of his Seiðr.

When they finally call it a night, hours into the morning, Loki is surprised when he finds himself wishing to stay longer and discuss his Seiðr further with Stark. So few have ever been kind in consideration of his Seiðr, even less have expressed an interest in it, and for Stark to have done both...

Loki doesn’t have words to describe it.

(Later, Loki will consider that evening as the dawn of their friendship.)

It is invigorating to engage in a battle of wits and intellect with Stark, Loki soon comes to find. Such was what had initially impressed him about Stark when he had been under the control of The Other, but with his presence in his mind gone, Loki finds himself naturally drawn to the inventor now. Their conversations are thrilling, and Loki finds himself leaping at the chance to flex his intellect with Stark.

They spend the following months spending an increasing amount of time together, even more so following the cease of Stark’s relationship with Pepper Potts. (Stark isolates for two weeks after that, before he emerges with an impressive performance of being fine.) They discuss in length his Seiðr, Stark’s technology, and other pieces of their lives that they both find interesting.

Stark’s technology, in particular, holds Loki’s attention, for while the designs that Stark has managed to come up with are far superior to anything else on Midgard, a select few are also unlike anything he has come across in his travels of the Realms. It’s an impressive feat, and Loki tells him so.

Loki is also especially fond of Stark’s creations, finding himself impressed by how his bots seem to have such curiosity and personality. (Dum-E and U both, he quickly realizes, are fiercely loyal of Stark.)

As their conversations of his Seiðr continue, it grows impossible to go without mentioning Frigga. Loki isn’t sure what he expects Stark’s reaction to be when he first mentions her, but Stark’s gentle smile and, “She sounds incredible, she must be proud of how talented you are,” far surpasses anything he had expected. The sentiment touches him, and something in their dynamic changes that night.

(Perhaps, it is because that is the night Stark changes to Tony.)

Despite this, they still do not engage in conversation easily about personal topics, both of them with too many difficult stories to wish to recall such information. Still, however, there are many nights where their respective nightmares leave them stripped of their shields, with only vulnerability left behind. It is on those nights that their bond is solidified; empathy and understanding found through sharing stories of past tortures and betrayals.

During one of those nights, Tony tells him of a man called Stane, sharing with him how Dum-E first, and then Pepper, had saved his life. His voice is broken, no more than a whisper, and his hand remains firmly on the device in his chest the entire time he speaks; a further testament to the pain of that betrayal.

Loki vows to him in that moment that he will never betray Tony, he swears it, for he would rather stab his own heart than cause his (only) friend pain in any way.

Tony just looks over at him, his expression sad and resigned all of a sudden. “I don’t think that’s a promise you want to make,” he says quietly. “Not when I’ll likely give you a reason to break it.”

“You know me; I say no less than what I mean,” Loki tells him. “And I can think of no reason that would ever make me want to hurt you or betray you.” He has betrayed others throughout his life, for reasons so little as for fun (stabbing Thor), but he knows he could never harm Tony.

Tony just shrugs. He doesn’t seem to believe him, but he provides no further argument. The blanket covering their laps as they sit together on the sofa suddenly feels stifling, but Loki resolutely ignores it. He understands that Tony’s skepticism is not personal, it is just a mere consequence of being betrayed time and time again by the people he cared about most. Loki knows he would hesitate to accept such a promise as well, even from Tony. Life has taught them both that it’s not safe to trust.

(Perhaps together, they can learn to trust again.)

The other members of the team remain wary of him, distrustful to the point that Loki is certain he will never be able to earn an ounce of trust with them. Outside of Tony, Thor seems to be the most accepting of the fact he is serving a ten year sentence for his attack on New York as a member of their team. Knowing he has Tony‘s friendship makes it easy, however, to disregard the fact that the others do not trust him, even on the field of battle. Never mind that his Seiðr has been limited to keep him in check, they clearly do not trust him to fight on their side. Loki pays this no mind; their belief in him or lack thereof is of no importance to him.

When he finally meets Pepper Potts, Col. James Rhodes, and a man named Happy Hogan, they all threaten him past the point of any return should he hurt Tony in any way. He believes them. The CEO of Tony’s company, his ex, however is the one whose threat genuinely gives him pause. He knows better than to anger her.

But for all their initial threats, the three of them all seem to accept him as Tony’s friend, therefore, as a part of their lives as well. It is awkward at times to be around Potts or Hogan, or even Rhodes when he is able to return home, but those moments of awkwardness, he finds, are worthwhile if it means he can remain at Tony’s side.

It’s a thought that should scare him, that he wants to be wherever Tony is, but he finds himself oddly at peace with that fact. They have grown close over the last five, almost six months since they first shared a drink in Tony’s penthouse, and Tony is incredible, a force of light wherever he goes; it is impossible not to be drawn to Tony, he thinks.

It’s a brisk day in mid-March when he and Tony crowd together on the sofa in his penthouse with a video feed in front of them to watch the fallout of their latest prank on Barton. Tony bursts out laughing at Barton’s indignation and leans against Loki as he praises their prank, saying they absolutely have to prank Cap next. Loki is overcome with joy realizing just how lucky and happy he is to have a friend who partakes and enjoys mischief just as much as he does.

That is also the moment Loki realizes he’s falling in love.

Tony has gone quiet as his side, eyes still sparkling with joy even as he asks, “You okay, Lokes?"

“I’m fine,” Loki reassures. “Just thinking of what to include in our next prank against Captain America himself.”

“I love the way you think,” Tony laughs, snuggling into his side the way he seems to do so frequently, now that Loki thinks about it. “Well, hit me with it. What’re you thinking?”

It’s easy enough to conjure a list of possible pranks at a moment’s notice, and from that moment onward, Loki’s feelings fall to the back of his mind, always quietly lingering in his every thought. Given enough time, he knows they will become a force he cannot hope to control, but that is a problem he can deal with in the future; the present includes planning a prank, and that comes first.

(Later, Loki will consider the moment he realized he was developing feelings for Tony as the day everything changed.)

“Can I join you?”

Loki startles minutely, so caught up in his reading, so relaxed, that he had not been paying attention to his surroundings in any capacity. But this is Tony who has come to his bedroom, and Loki knows he need not keep his guard up when the inventor is around. "Are you alright?" Loki asks, lowering his book to his lap.

"Fine," Tony says automatically. He looks uncertain. "I know you're reading and it's late, so if you want me to leave, don’t hesitate to say so.”

“Nonsense, I always enjoy your company,” Loki reassures absently, frowning at Tony’s haggard experience. He gestures to the space next to him on the bed, adding unnecessarily, “Please, sit.”

Tony hesitates for a moment and then sits down on the bed next to him, leaning back. His hands twist unnaturally together; a sign of his anxiety.

Loki marks his page and sets his book on the nightstand. “Do you wish to talk about what has you so tense?”

“Not really,” Tony mutters. “Not like there’s much to say anyway though. I fell asleep working on an upgraded set of arrows for Clint and woke up screaming. J said you were awake still, so I came up.” He pauses and then adds, "You've been reading all this time? Usually you call it a night at midnight."

"I got enthralled in an old journal on Seiðr and lost track of time. When I realized it was past two, I figured I would wait until I came to a natural stopping point before I retired for the night,” Loki admits ruefully. "I'll be tired in the morning, but it will be well worth it."

"I think I'm rubbing off on you," Tony says lightly. "Staying up until all hours of the night to finish something is my shtick, not yours."

"You have a point. You did, after all, initially encourage my pranks, then you took to assisting me with them, and now you have me staying up to all hours of the night," Loki points out, teasing, participating in the lighthearted atmosphere Tony seems to be trying to create. A distraction for his nightmare, perhaps, and Loki is happy to help. "You are a rather bad influence on me."

"Guilty as charged," Tony agrees, snorting. "Though I'm pretty sure everything prank-related is a result of you being a bad influence on me."

"A mere pleasant consequence of our friendship. You knew what you were getting yourself into when you first let me share a drink with you in your penthouse."

"I did knowingly sign up for all the mischief and chaos, you're right." Tony shrugs, looking pleased. "But as Rhodey will be more than happy to tell you, I caused plenty of trouble throughout my life, so you sadly don't get the privilege of claiming responsibility for all of my evil ways."

"I plan to ask about those stories, just so you know."

Tony laughs, looking lighter now than he had when he had first appeared in Loki's doorway. "Pretty sure you'll have to clear your schedule for the weekend when you do- but keep in mind, Rhodey did also participate in a lot of my plans. He was my partner in crime. So don't let his exasperated tone fool you, he's just as much a prankster as we are."

"In that case, we will have to include him in our plans to prank Thor whenever both your colonel and Thor are present in the Tower," Loki muses.

"Deal," Tony responds instantly. He goes quiet just a moment later, his expression darkening a little.

Loki frowns at the sudden shift in mood. "What's wrong?"

"I should probably go, let you finish the chapter you were reading so you can go to bed."

“I am more than happy to have you here," Loki says carefully, sensing that there is something else weighing on his mind. "But if you wish to go, that is your choice to make.”

“I don’t want to keep you up.”

“Then prepare for bed and lay with me,” Loki says without thinking. He pauses, realizing what he just said. Norns, he had not meant to offer that, but the offer has been extended and he is not one to take back his words. Still though, he clarifies quickly, “It’s an innocent offer, no more than the simple opportunity for you to not be alone tonight, if you don't want to be.”

Tony looks startled. “You want me to stay?”

“You are welcome to, if you want.”

“Why?”

“You are my friend,” Loki says simply. “We have fallen asleep watching movies together on the sofa before and that is fine, is it not?” At Tony’s nod he continues, “So too would your decision to stay here for the night. Nightmares are painful, and if I can offer some small comfort or reassurance of safety, I would happily do so.”

“You’re sure?”

“I mean every word I’ve shared,” Loki says gently.

Tony sighs and leans against him, his head on Loki’s shoulder. “Thanks,” he says softly. “For letting me stay and for not judging me.”

“You know how common my own night terrors are,” Loki points out. "I have nothing to judge."

Tony shrugs but doesn’t offer a response.

“Go, get ready for bed,” Loki says, nudging him with his elbow. “I have placed an additional toothbrush and nightwear for you in the bathroom.”

Tony nods silently and gets up, disappearing into the bathroom. Loki uses the privacy to lay down, trying to quell his racing thoughts and pounding heart. There is something charged and vulnerable between them; it feels like he is balancing precariously on a fraying line. What may happen if it snaps, he’s unsure.

When Tony exits the bathroom a few minutes later, he pauses at the side of the bed for a moment before he pulls back the covers. He doesn’t lay down, however, just says quietly, “You don’t seem as bothered anymore to be serving part of your sentence on the Avengers.”

“Is that a question?” Loki asks, never one to make things easy when he can help it.

“An observation, I think. Am I wrong?”

“No, you are not wrong,” Loki says. He takes a shuddering breath and admits, “I hated this team in the beginning. I was no more than a collection of broken pieces being held together by pure spite, and being placed on this team felt like a death sentence. I expected to hate every moment of my time here, for an abundance of reasons.” He swallows hard, suddenly certain he should not keep going, not when he has already stripped himself bare.

“But?”

As always with Tony, he is the exception to the expectations and restrictions Loki sets for himself. He finds himself staring up at the ceiling and admitting, “But I made a friend, someone who cares about me genuinely for all that I am. It took the work of months before I realized that all the reasons I expected to hate being on this team were insignificant in comparison to the friendship I had found. These last several months, I have found myself slowly recovering from the damage The Other inflicted on me- I am trying to at least- I am trying not to be the monster I was destined to be, and I somehow even find myself happy on occasion, something I thought I was only capable of when creating chaos.”

His bedroom is quiet for a moment. “Sounds like your friend is pretty special,” Tony quips.

“Special is not the most accurate term; short, on the other hand, or perhaps, talkative, or even-”

“You're an ass,” Tony interrupts him, laughing. His expression is pensive, however, as he lays down on his side and looks over at him. “Is that all we are though, just friends?”

Loki freezes. It takes a moment for him to remember to breathe, and then he exhales slowly, rolling over on his side to face Tony as well. “I’m not sure,” he admits, “Are we just friends, in your mind?”

“I asked you first,” Tony points out, smirking a little.

“I gave you a response, however vague, and then asked your thoughts. It’s your turn.”

“Uh huh, you want my thoughts on what exactly? You haven’t really specified what we’re discussing.”

Loki refrains from rolling his eyes despite the way his heart is threatening to pound out of his chest. “What are your thoughts on us,” he emphasizes. “That is what I wish to know.”

Tony’s eyes search him for a moment, perhaps trying to assess if this is part of a joke or if he is being genuine. “I think that you’re a royal pain in the ass a lot of the time, as well as dramatic and passionate, but I like that about you. You’re also mischievous and clever; you're a genius that speaks the same language as me. I also think you have feelings for me, just like I do for you. And I want to see if there can be an us...but maybe after I kiss you?”

“Is that a promise?”

“The romantic speech or the kissing part?”

“The part where you mentioned wanting to see if there can be an us, do you mean that?”

“Of course I mean it." Tony pouts at him.

It suddenly is so easy now to see what has been in front of him for months: their close proximity to each other, the way they are drawn to each other's side, their flirting; it has all been leading to this.

Loki leans over and kisses him. Tony gives a quiet sound of surprise and then relaxes, easing into the kiss with an approach that somehow already feels familiar.

“We need to do this more often,” Tony murmurs when they pull back. He's grinning.

Loki laughs, happy. “That is a promise I can easily keep,” he vows, and kisses him again to prove his point.

End.

[unqualified-critic]

I’d like to start off this review with the reminder that these people put their heart and soul into their work. They work countless hours, while I sit on my ass and type on a blog. I have no film experience, or writing skill, yet plenty of opinions.

I was initially very excited for the series, I love Loki as a character and Tom Hiddleston always does a fantastic job playing him (I actually wish they had him write the character instead of giving him minimal input) However, I wish I didn't watch past episode 3. The directing and writing felt sloppy at best. Loki felt extremely out of character. The development he goes through feels overnight. Remember this is the same Loki that ripped out a guys eye and the next day is in the TVA.

We see Loki go through great change in Dark World and Ragnarok (I get it we can’t all be Taika Waititi) despite the limited scenes featuring him. I’m the movies we see his transition from evil, but he is still the god of mischief, first and foremost. Those movies were maybe 5 hours together, yet better translated the characters depth, than the entire show about him. If it really was about Loki... the series felt as if Loki is back seat to a long monologue filled with plot holes.

There is a severe lack of action. At one point it is addressed that magic cannot be used in the TVA; but Loki is still witty, a good fighter, and has super human strength. We see none of that here and he is reduced to a powerless shell of himself. The few over the top “super hero” effects used, were produced beautifully by the cgi and film crew. The TVA set was well produced and fun with the retro “DMV” feel. The simple costume design with neutral colors and progressively darker lighting, could've paired nicely in contrast against Loki’s character. He’s typically sarcastic, quick on his feet, egotistical, and energetically self absorbed. This series he didn’t even feel broken or exhausted, just bland. Hey, you should always have artistic vision and change material. But characters can only be changed so far, and so quickly without any sustainable reason. It felt almost like a fan-fiction written from the writers ideas, and not the source material.

One of my biggest issues and final straws was the relationship. The relationship felt very forced and wrong. Slyvie and Loki are essentially twins, due to the same parentage. A love interest is not necessary in every series, and it took away from this one severely. I found myself dreading the finale due to the obvious upcoming kiss. The director, Kate Herron, addressed that it was to represent self love...however if you have to explain why it's not incest, it's probably incest. I understand some people don't mind because Slyvie doesn't feel like a Loki (Maybe it's the fact that she looks like and is named after Enchantress rather than lady Loki...not very creative guys) But it made me very uncomfortable. The director is a LGBT woman herself, yet I feel she was locked in a very male gaze, heteronormative, direction. A woman can co-star without being a love interest. An example of this done well is Loki’s friendly relationship with Verity in the comic Agent of Asgard. They met and became friends in only a matter of comics, with better tangibility of relations. In the comics we also see as a version of Lady Loki, and expression of gender-fluidity; without feeling forced or “woke.” On that note, if Loki is established as gender fluid in the MCU, why is there only one female variant of him. The other variants even express surprise of there being a female variant.

Slyvie lacks depth and felt “gatekeep, gaslight, girlboss.” Sophia Di Martino plays Slyvie well and I have no qualms with the castings. I was very excited for a female character with more story than Black Widow, but it was never given. It’s been confirmed that Sylvie isn’t Enchantress, however for the sake of character design, continuity, and incest...I hope she is and that they’re just keeping it a secret.

With a second season coming, I’m glad a new director will be taking the reins. As bad as I feel saying it. Disney has the budget to do better, and not use a “well let’s see what they make” strategy.

I’m not sure how a series can feel so rushed and so empty at the same time. As if it was drawn out to waste time and tell us nothing.

I also found the secondary characters like Owen Wilson’s Mobius and Wunmi Mosaku who plays hunter b-15 likable but underused. Something that left a bad taste in my mouth was how all the characters played by POC were bad guys or killed off. For those unaware this is a trope often exercised by “progressive” creators, usually attempting to include black or Hispanic characters but promptly killing them off or reducing them to a villain. This all just contributes to an absolutely messy series.

No, I didn’t think they’d reverse Loki’s death, give us gender shifting Loki, or Lady Loki as she is from the comics. However the lack of coherent writing (not that I’m one to talk,) contrast of Loki’s character, and rushed emptiness, was a major disappointment. If you love this character, don’t go past episode 2. Feel free to let me know your thoughts both critically and enjoyability at face value.

TLDR: good acting, casting, special effects. Poor character development, weird incest relationship, empty “progressiveness” and lack of action.

Wouldn’t watch past episode 2 if I could go back in time

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I A THIRSTY INTERLUDE

First time reader click here

Bun Bun at 2:30 AM posting: This is 110% pornography. I wrote that when I was feeling extra thirsty over Tony and his Nano suit so yeah... A bit of choking a bit of mild suit bondage. Daddy kink 👉🏻👈🏻🥺 BDSM themes. Humor & porn. Has minimal correlation with the story and can be read as standalone smut-shot. Inspired by this NSFW tik tok audio (headphones!).

"OH MY GOD, NO! NO, NO, SHIT, FUCK, NO!"

"Princess, what's wrong?" Steve's worried voice rang high in the kitchen, followed by an alarming clattering of the dishes against the sink. "Are you hurt?" He didn't even remark on my use of profanity, which meant I'd startled the Captain for sure. He appeared in the doorway ready to fight, run; his eyes immediately drawn to his shield in the corner.

"Only what's left of my dignity," I sighed.

"Oh, okay," He visibly sagged, tension leaving his voice and his body. "What happened?"

I inhaled several times, feeling heat creep up my neck and blossom on my cheeks. It took a lot, and I mean A LOT, to make me feel embarrassed enough to fumble my words and palm my face but that was exactly what I did. "Well, umm... Tony found a couple of thirst tweets. Mine, from my sophomore year. And uh, retweeted them." I thought I'd cleaned up my social media quite well, actually. My fingers twitched remembering manually sorting through thousands of posts. Apparently, my fingers weren't clever enough.

Steve snorted, evidently having had someone tell him what a thirst tweet was. He, however, did not understand the sheer mortification that I would be subjected to at the hands of Tony. And my classmates. And Peter, oh my God. Natasha and Wanda too, probably. And Loki.

I. Was. Toast.

"How bad was it?" Bucky piped up, finally having dealt with the mini laughter fit.

"Not worse than what you two get up to in the gym when you think nobody is home," I immediately retorted in hopes of avoiding teasing from the metal-armed man. He would take the chance, of course, he would.

"Oof, I'm sorry, doll," Bucky whistled sympathetically. And promptly pulled out his phone, to, what I assumed, see the offending social media posts for himself. I assumed correctly. Bucky was bent over laughing in no time - was it my doing or did Tony's own commentary on them that made the whole situation so hilarious to the gramps on steroids?

"I will light you on fire," I seethed but remained where I was standing. There was no point in doing anything about them now. Screenshots were probably already being saved on everybody's devices.

Steve peeped over his boyfriend's shoulder, chuckling. "You had a crush on Tony? That's embarrassing, doll." He had the audacity to give me an innocent smile before returning to his dishwashing.

"Punk, I don't know if - and I quote: Not to be That Girl™ - it's trademarked, by the way - but Tony Stark could hit it and quit it and I wouldn't even be mad - qualifies as a crush." Bucky pointed out, the sound of his voice being drowned out by Steve's guffaws. "And this one definitely does not qualify for it to be a romantic setting. Listen: I'm not a fucking bottom, okay?.. there are seventeen question marks. But, like, can Tony Stark choke me in one of his Iron Man suits - nine more question marks." Bucky joined his partner's laughter, unable to continue.

I was literally on fire. My face burned, my hands shook. I had the strongest urge to stick my index fingers in my ears and loudly yell "la-la-la" until both fossils ceased to roast me like I was some sort of holiday brisket. "I hate you. I will burn... The heart... Out of you," I seethed.

"O-oh, honey bu-un, da-arling..." I heard Tony's sing-song voice happily calling for me. Too happily. Not good.

I had literal seconds to get myself scarce out of this situation. I'd already avoided the dozen text messages, two calls in hopes the engineer would drop the topic and go back to his Big Bad Science Project. I had underestimated his persistent desire to cause chaos and his terrible, no-good sense of humor.

It was fun and games when we teamed up to prank our friends. I just never expected for the tables to be turned this way, y'know? Betrayal of the highest quality. The turntables had been turned - decidedly NOT in my favor.

In a brief moment of panicked clarity, I opened one of the empty bottom cabinets in the kitchen. It took some uncomfortable folding and maneuvering but I got myself inside and pressed the door shut seconds before his footsteps made the distinctive noise of sneakers on tile.

"Capsicle, Terminator," I heard Tony greet the two laughing supersoldiers. "Have you seen my Princess?"

I melted a little bit at the way Tony called me his, I won't lie.

"Nope," Bucky lied shamelessly.

"She's in the empty cabinet," Steve chuckled at the same time. Top 10 anime betrayals, right there.

"Wow - and I thought we were friends," Tony scoffed, I assumed at Bucky. My body tensed and I prepared to dial-up my puppy eyes to eleven. My hiding spot was wack.

The door was roughly tossed open, my eyes landing on Tony's oil-stained jeans. He crouched down, his brown eyes positively sparkling. The engineer's body radiated smug mischief, fingers twitching in anticipation.

"Sorry, Princess is unavailable right now. May I take a message?" I said, pulling on the cabinet door and fully prepared to slam it shut in his face. I was NOT ready for any more mortification.

Tony's chuckle shook me to the core, louder and ten times more expressive in the cramped, dark space of my temporary lair. "Come on out, baby girl. I didn't peg you for a wallflower."

"Duly noted," I said warily, having been expecting for him to drag me out and carry me to his bedroom, caveman style. I had noticed that my dorky self revved up his gears faster than any stereotypical seductive shit. It was no secret, at least not for us 'vengers, that Tony was a huge dork himself but I guess it takes one to know one.

"So, my suits, huh?" He smirked after a brief moment and just like that, I Did Not Like Where This Was Going. The receding footsteps and quiet snickering only confirmed my suspicions. Tony's form blocked the opening of the cabinet, crowding me even further into the already cramped space.

"Um," I found myself pretty much speechless. Part of me was excited and yearning - of fucking course I was curious if Tony Stark, genius and former playboy, had found a way to incorporate his suits of armor into the bedroom. Daresay, it was the question of the decade, according to Cosmopolitan, GQ, and a whole lot of other large media outlets.

The more sensible part of me screamed shame for that, playing with an essentially massive, powerful destruction machine. Something meant to protect millions of people from bad guys and aliens. It seemed blasphemous to waste such an important thing on scratching a curious itch.

I blinked owlishly, squirming.

"Okay, out you go." Tony's patience had run out and he withdrew himself, promptly standing up.

I heard the tapping of his fingers as I ungracefully stumbled out. He was occupied with his tablet so I turned around to adjust myself and the things on the countertop I had accidentally jostled in my rush to preserve some dignity.

An arm snaked around my waist, cold and unyielding, brushing against my exposed midriff with metal fingertips. Goosebumps followed the touch as I shivered involuntarily, stuttering in my breathing. "Fuck." The sound came out as if it was punched out of my throat with force, breathy.

"What's your safeword?" Tony's neatly groomed beard scratched against my ear. His voice was heavy and his lips were moist.

"Banana," I blurted the first thing that came into my mind. My body was hot and yet, I froze in place. The sheer power that the man behind me contained demanded unyielding obedience. I had no choice but to comply.

"Friday, lock the door. Nobody but me, in and out." Tony growled, pulling my hips into his metal-covered form.

Were we really doing this in the communal kitchen? With Steve and Bucky probably fully aware of what exactly was going on in here? Tony seemed to have zero reservations about that; in fact, I was almost sure he'd orchestrated the whole thing somehow. Steve owed like a dozen favors to the engineer.

The thick of Tony's leg firmly wedged itself between my thighs, spreading them open just enough so I was forced to put a slight arch in my back to keep still, my ass and shoulders firmly pressing against his Iron Man suit. I felt the coldness of the metal through my clothes, heard the hum of the nanobots in my ears.

My blood responded, heartbeat pulsing in my ears in sync with the electrical currents supplying the man behind me with the immense physical power to match his mental one. "Shit," The sound of my voice was faint. His other arm began creeping up my side to my shoulders, making an unmistakable beeline for my neck.

Tony applied firm pressure on it, wrapping the gauntlet carefully - not restricting the airflow, just steering me as he wished. And apparently, he had some very strong ideas about my current predicament: "Got me right where you wanted me?" He asked, low and breathy.

As I attempted to make noise, his hand tightened on my throat. Eyelids involuntarily sliding closed, my lips shook with the force it took me to muster up enough oxygen to hum a sloppy. "Mhm..."

"Can't hear you, baby girl," His cheek rested against mine, scratchy and hot and smelling like iron and gasoline and Tony.

Another shaky breath, I attempted to force the words out - for some reason, Tony's presence commanded me to obey him like never before. I nearly shivered from the sheer aura of power surrounding my man and it was his cue to lessen the careful pressure on my throat - just enough for blood to rapidly rush to my ears, making the world even hazier. "Yeah, Tony," It didn't take me much time to give him the enthusiastic consent he was looking for.

"Uh-uh," Tony tutted cheerfully. His other arm snaked around my waist, dipping lower to play with the hem of my skirt. God bless me for wearing a skirt! The rough pads of his fingertips scratched against the soft, sensitive flesh of my inner thighs. "I think we're past first name basis, baby," The suit retracted, mostly. The nanotech allowed for different parts of it to cover Tony's body in odd places: I felt the gauntlets and the arm braces, as well as part of a chest plate, but waist down my man was wearing simple jeans and tee.

"Uh," My brain supplied unhelpfully, feeling the bulge pressing against my ass. "Daddy?"

"That's my girl," I was rewarded with a groan, so sinful and delicious, falling from his lips straight into my ear. The hand that had gone down south cupped the mound of my pussy with a tender gesture. "Or Iron Man's?" He teased, grinding into me from behind.

"Yours," I keened obediently, my body seeming to find it impossible to decide between rubbing myself on his hand and his cock. It was a hard choice - pun absolutely intended. I was long uncomfortable in my panties and Tony's clever digits surely felt it, yet he made no further moves. "Daddy," I tried to put how much I ached for him into words.

Tony hummed, placing his wet mouth on the juncture of my neck for a moment. His hot breath seared my skin. The curious fingers finally, finally, reached the apex of my thighs. "Fuckin' shit, baby, you're..." He didn't bother finishing the sentence, speaking with his actions instead, scissoring his fingers between my labia, running the knuckles over my clit.

Just to feel me pant and shiver. I was sensitive and so aroused it was nearly unbearable. Tony always made me feel some type of way and, once again, my man had outdone himself. There was no shame left in me as I shifted my hips to the rhythm of his hand.

"Please?" I asked him prettily, knowingly that one little word would get me everything I wanted. A hard fucking, a new dress, a car, or, Hell, my own private island. My eyes were pretty when I begged, he had said. I would move the world for you, he had meant.

"Baby," The whisper was rushed as Tony turned me around and claimed my lips, hoisting my ass onto the marble countertop of the common kitchens. My legs wrapped around his hips, seeking the warmth and relief of his skin on mine. I wanted him inside of me, inconvenient location and two layers of clothing be damned. I wanted to bury myself in him until either of us couldn't tell who started and ended where.

"Daddy," I whispered into the thin line of his mouth, conveying my all-consuming need in a single word.

My skirt was hiked up in a second, the gauntlets of his suit still on his hands tearing my pants in a single clean motion. Eagerly, I scooted forward to pop the button on his jeans; grateful for the fact more often than not, Tony choose to forgo the belt whatsoever when working in the lab. Today was my lucky day.

His cock, red and thick and hard enough to pound nails with, weighed my hand down for barely a second beforehand Tony's gauntlets closed around both of my wrists, securing them to my chest. His other arm swiftly wrapped around me, pulling me close to him, as close as we could be together without sharing a single body. The blunt tip of his manhood stood at my entrance - not just teasing it but seeking permission.

One keen that seemed to come from deep insight my chest and I felt Tony's breath hitch as our sensitive flesh met; he filled me up at least as superbly as I hugged him. We shared a moan and a breath, just feeling each other, feeling the moment.

We were short on patience. Tony's hand slid onto the small of my back, urging our hips to meet each other, setting a punishing pace from the very start.

"Fuck, Daddy, oh God," I panted. I wasn't used to getting things started with so little prep.

"Baby," Tony rumbled, trying for stern, having it come out as breathless as I felt. "Shit, so fuckin' tight," His words garbled.

The sound of flesh slapping flesh was loud, perhaps, loud enough for certain enhanced folk to hear should they happen to pass the kitchen doors - and if that didn't make my insides clench in the most delectable ways.

Tony grunted in response, a lewd noise adding to the cacophony. "Gonna come?" His teeth caught my bottom lip, pulling it slightly. "For Daddy?" He asked, all traces of his usual cockiness gone, as he pulled away slightly to stare right in my wide eyes with his baby doe browns, equally blown with lust and longing.

Neither of us would last. "Yes, fuck, Daddy, please," I begged.

His hips angled just right, Tony continued mercilessly railing me, holding up my weak body between his arms. I felt the cold metal of the gauntlets through my shirt. The shivers ran across my skin in heaps, like busy little ants.

"Come for Daddy," Tony ordered, yanking me closer to hit that sweet spot deep inside of me. I couldn't resist the command, feeling the waves build up with every brutal stroke, clenching, muffling the screaming of my release in the crook of his neck, relishing in the growl that left his lips as he followed me, releasing my arms and folding his torso over mine. "Fuck," Was the only coherent word that left Tony's mouth, his seed creating a sticky mess between our legs.

"Yeah," I moaned, unwilling to part from him. It was intense. My world was spinning on its axis and my Tony was the center of it. He said something again, something soft and quiet, and my only concern was to rub my nose on his pulse point, to savor and remember the smell of our shared pleasure.

"Baby..." Tony sounded... Concerned. He withdrew slowly, frowning at my sleepy state. His frown only intensified when I absentmindedly rubbed my wrists - there were bound to be some marks left from the force of his grip. It was hot and it was... A surefire way to tell the suits weren't really adapted for bedroom games. Kitchen games.

"Daddy," I mumbled, sounding sad and pathetic to my own ears. I kind of wanted to cuddle and watch a movie but it seemed weird asking that from Tony since we've done crazier things and I had never felt like this, never got this greedy.

"Oh, baby, c'mere," He had come to some sort of conclusion. After re-doing his pants and picking up the scraps of fabric that used to be my panties, his arms made a comfortable nest. I was picked up without any troubles; the gauntlets had disappeared, too, into the thin golden bracelets around his wrists. I allowed myself to play with them, the shiny colors doing a good job of distracting me all throughout the brisk walk through the main living room and the swift elevator ride.

Tony's bed was messy, unmade and smelled like us - just the way I had left it that morning. Tony's hands were gentle as he stripped me and then swiftly chucked his own clothes.

"Watcha' doin'?" I asked as he wrapped his body around mine.

"Shh, we'll talk later," He murmured, looking slightly dazed himself. "Friday, put Stardust on the TV. 25% volume," As soon as the command was spoken, one of my comfort movies began playing on the large screen. Tony's hand kept stroking my hair and I didn't resist the temptation to close my eyes, settling into a peaceful lull atop the glowing white-blue of Tony's arc reactor.

My favorite color in the world, to be honest. It felt like I'd slept for ages when I opened my eyes to see the color again. "Um, hi," I supplied meekly, feeling way out of my depths from my own strange behavior.

"Mornin', Princess," Tony seemed joyful, the bags under his eyes a little less prominent than before.

I made moves to get out of the bed but he wrapped an arm around me, tugging me closer. "What do you know about sub drop?" He questioned me, in response to my vaguely confused noises.

That's what it was?!

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit ​ @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway @softie-socks @schemefrenzy @letsby @cutenessloading @romeo-the-cactus @jelly-fishy-babie

[cyclogenesis]

For the writing ask (you don’t have to answer all of them since I probably picked too many, sorry!): 1, 2, 7, 8, 10, 19, 20, 26, 30, 31, 32, 36, 38, 39, 40. (Thanks 💜)

I did it, I answered all of them!! (Yes, it took me a couple of days aha.) Thanks for asking anon! 😘

1. Which of your fics would you keep the basic plot of but rewrite completely?

Generally speaking I would rather die than rewrite anything ever, and most of the stuff I’ve written I can look back on and be like “nice”. I did recently reread a few bandom fics I wrote and felt mildly horrified by the fact that some of the writing was so spare that the dialogue sections were like reading a screenplay, so I’d have to say those would come the closest. Like I wouldn’t actually ever rewrite them, but were I to write them today they would read very, very differently.

2. Anything that you’d like to write but feel like you’re unable to?

Honestly I read soooo much Hydra Trash Party stuff and would love to vibe with Bucky’s sexual trauma in fic more but I feel like I’d really struggle to write that kind of background given my usual writing style. That’s the kind of super iddy thing I usually do in chatfic, but unfortunately I don’t have anyone to do that with in this fandom, so I’ll just keep whining internally about the lack of HTP Sam/Bucky while doing absolutely nothing to address that glaring lack.

Rest of the answers behind the cut!

7. Your favourite ao3 tag.

I cruise the Bottom Bucky Barnes tag like a 50s kid dragging Main.

8. How slow is a slow burn?

HERE’S THE THING. So if I ship something super hard, like hard enough to write or read fic about it, then I have already interpreted the canon itself as a slow burn because presumably they haven’t kissed yet, and I’m writing or reading fic because I’m ready for the kissing to be happening. I also don’t tend to read a whole lot of long fic. So basically I’m gonna need kissing by at least the 15k mark unless it’s like, masterfully written.

10. Top three favourite fic tropes.

You know, I’m honestly not usually drawn to stuff that’s very traditionally tropey! I don’t write it too often either, usually with fic I’m just a simple gal who wants to look at canon and then figure out a way to get them to acknowledge they want to kiss each other. I do love fake relationships though!

19. Share a snippet from a wip without giving any context for it.

“There’s more than one Loki,” Sam is disturbed to tell him. “A bunch more. One of them is a good guy now.” Actually, Strange had described him as ‘moderately helpful and uncomfortably sincere’. “Another one, uh, broke time, and now there are multiple timelines that have created different universes.”

“Got it,” Bucky says, in the tone of someone who in no way has it.

20. Do you work on a single project or many at the same time? How does that work for you?

I usually have a couple of things going at once that I bounce between until I decide that I’m Going To Finish Something, Dammit and force myself to focus on just one. It’s generally fine because I’d rather have too many ideas than none at all, though I’ll sometimes inadvertently cannibalize myself and have to edit out things I’ve used in two different WIPs.

26. What would you describe as OOC?

I’m honestly pretty forgiving about that, having been trained to suspend my disbelief by liking really dark fic hahaha. One weird thing that tends to throw me in not-dark fic is a lack of humor in the dialogue. I tend to like fandoms with pretty funny characters or people, so I like to see their sense of humor reflected in fic. Sam and Bucky in particular are really funny characters in their own ways - gimme the banter, please!!

30. Describe a fic that almost happened, but then it didn’t.

In so many fandoms I’ve had visions of an OTP epic spanning years and years, and in zero of those fandoms have I ever completed one of those stories.

31. What was the most difficult fic for you to write (but in the end you made it)?

There is a point where every fic feels like the most difficult thing I’ve ever written. Something particularly cute that I do, which I love, is writing very intensely up to the sex scene, and then getting shy about it and wandering away and not working on it again for a little while, despite the fact that usually the whole point of the fic is that I want to get to the sex scene!!!

32. Do you have a word/expression that you always use in your writing?

I’m sure I have plenty of things like that!! I try to edit repetitive things like that out because when I’m reading a lot of a writer’s stuff little phrasing quirks always stand out to my copyeditor brain. That said, I know when I’m doing it and still tend to huffily be like “well that’s the best way to phrase that action!!” so, whatever.

36. How do you come up with fic titles? What’s the one you’re most proud of?

I either have a title from the jump or I’m combing my music library for a lyric snippet I can use like ten minutes before I post the fic. I’m pretty fond of This Is A Song About Fucking in that I committed SO deeply to jacking myself off there; it’s a phrase that Brendon Urie used to say to introduce Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off during the Nothing Rhymes With Circus tour (I had to look that tour name up. Thank GOD I had to look that tour name up) and I used it for a 5SOS group sex fic posted a cool eight years after that tour (which I went to multiple dates of, oh god) ended.

38. “This never happened” fix-it fics or “this happened but” fix-it fics?

Definitely the latter, when a canon makes a lousy choice I’m usually like well here we are, let’s talk about where we go from here. But I don’t really look for anything with the fix-it tag in general, once the canon breaks something I loved I’m usually so moody that I just abandon ship and stop reading fic haha.

39. Wildest AU scenario you have written?

I verrrry rarely write AUs for posting, but have chatficced some truly bonkers nonsense in my time. My old writing partner in bandom and I used to get weird with Brendon/Ryan - the satyr/fairy and fisherman/selkie days were really something.

40. Write a 9-word fic.

I’m too invested in the thing I’ve written 5k words of these week to think of anything new, so here’s a snippet from that instead.

“Come here,” he chokes out, and the helpless hope on Bucky’s face in response nearly undoes him completely. He sits up to meet Bucky halfway, grabs at his shirt the moment he’s within reach and drags him close, Bucky climbing onto the bed all long limbs and graceless need. The kiss is a surprise only in how rough it is, a hard press of lips like Bucky’s greedy to touch Sam any way he can, like this is just another way for them to collide.

[eevee-of-rivia]

Black Paper Emerald Letters

Summary: Hogwart!AU where Lilith and Loki are best friends (and both slytherin) but she’s in love with him. 

(I’m really bad with plots sorry)

Pairing: Loki x Fem OFC

Word count: 2,3k

Warning: nothing, so much fluff

 A/N; So @nevenabadr​ asked me for a Loki one shot so I finished this old Hogwarts!AU I hope you’ll like it! 

     Lilith was sitting in the common room of Slytherin reading the book she had         lent her a few days ago, her best friend and captain of her Quidditch team,           Loki.

The girl was very focused on a particularly eventful point in the story when, at one point, she was distracted by the noise of footsteps and a female voice. Curious, she decided to go and check it out thinking it was a freshman girl who had just come in and had difficulty finding the female dormitory. Lilith did not have time to get up from the couch on which she was sitting when she saw Loki hand in hand with a Ravenclaw girl chuckling and whispering things in her best friend’s ear. "Sorry pet, I thought no one was here," Loki said, watching the black-haired girl. Lilith did not have time to respond because the Ravenclaw girl began to leave kisses on the boy’s neck in front of her, suggesting he go to his room and continue the fun there. With a Sly smirk on his face, Loki laid a hand on the life of the blonde girl who was with him leading to the stairs leading to the male dorm greeting her best friend with a small wave of the hand. Left alone Lilith took a few deep breaths trying to calm down before letting the tears flow freely that now wet her cheeks. The next day "Wanda you don’t understand! Loki doesn’t like me and couldn’t make it any clearer than that," Lilith said, wearing her knees to her chest, leaning her chin on them to look her best friend in the face. "Lilith.." It was the only thing the girl could say as she tried to console her friend, putting an arm over her shoulder and lightly holding her shoulder. "Maybe I’m just not enough for him Wanda. I mean, look at me and then look at him. He’s a god and I’m just me. A nerd who spend all of her time in the library reading books or studying for some exam" "Lilith, I know that you won’t believe me but I can assure you that you are an amazing girl and if he doesn’t see that well He’s a total idiot." The redhead said looking at her best friend and taking her hands. "You’re just saying that because I’m your best friend.." objected the girl shifting her gaze by focusing her attention on some Gryffindor boys.

Wanda glanced at Lilith before continuing her speech. "You are wrong my dear, I say this because it’s the fucking truth. You’re an amazing, sweet, empathetic, funny girl. You are not like the others Lilith, you are special and I can assure you that I’m not lying to you, I will never do that" The girl looked at Wanda for a few seconds in the eyes before wiping the tears, which had formed in her eyes just before, with the sleeve of her shirt. "You don’t understand. I will never be enough for him. And I know what you are gonna say but he’s not like you see him, I saw the real Loki, and it’s different from what everyone thinks. He’s so sweet and kind but also so broken and scared and.." Lilith sighed slightly before turning her back on Wanda, who was also standing at the time. "I love the true Loki and this will never change even if he will never love me back. I will be always here for him" and, without giving her best friend a chance to answer Lilith ran away into the dorms locking herself in her room until the time of her next lesson.

That night Lilith had just returned to her room after finishing classes for the day. He was exhausted and his only thought was to take a shower, lock himself in the room and sleep until the next morning. The girl was going to lie on the bed when she saw that on her pillow there was a letter resting on it. She was slightly confused and amazed by that thing but didn’t give much thought, thinking it was a letter from her friend Wanda, worried since they had not seen since that morning since Lilith had missed both lunch and dinner, preferring to focus his attention on studying for upcoming exams, spending all his time in the library.

Lilith was about to ignore the letter, preferring a hot shower when she noticed a particular detail: the paper was black and, above it, were drawn details of silver color. "This can’t be Wanda," thought the girl taking hold of the letter deciding to find out its contents.

There was a long minute of silence after Lilith opened the letter. She was amazed by its contents: a piece of paper, also black, on which had been written, in emerald green, a poem.

Nocturnal poetry

Dressed in the whitest silver you’d smile at me

Every night I wait

Silent I lie with a smile on my face

Appearance deceives and the silence betrays

As I wait for the time

My dream comes alive

Always out of sight

But never out of mind

And under waning moon

Still I long for you

"It is not signed," said the girl after having read the poem several times, and after having inspected countless times the letter and the sheet on which the poem was written, in search of a clue as to who might have written it. Exhausted by the long day, Lilith decided to put the paper on the bedside table next to her bed, deciding to take the letter the next day to her friend Wanda and look for some clues together about the person who could write the letter.

Exhausted by the long day, Lilith decided to put the paper on the bedside table next to her bed, deciding to take the letter the next day to her friend Wanda and look for some clues together about the person who could write the letter. "Wanda you aren’t listening to me! I said that it isn’t signed!" He repeated Lilith for the hundredth time, trying to be heard by his best friend who, at the time, was inspecting the poem along with her boyfriend, Vision. "That means you have a secret admirer Lilith!" exclaimed the girl while on her face appeared a small grin at the thought of her best friend with a secret admirer. "We must immediately start looking for him!" he continued, taking the black-haired girl by the hand. Lilith shook her head. "No Wanda, I don’t want to find him" "But, why'" asked the girl with a confused expression on her face. "You know why," she said by not looking at her best friend. Wanda sighed slightly and gave the girl a gentle look. "It’s ok Lilith, I know that you love Loki but maybe this is your chance to let him go and to finally be happy. I’m not saying that you should forget about Loki in just two seconds but that maybe you could give this guy a chance." Lilith remained somewhat silent, thinking of the girl’s words before nodding lightly. "Maybe you’re right, Wanda, but I’m not ready to look for him yet. Let’s wait a few more days and see how things evolve, please" the girl asked to her best friend who nodded before heading to class together with Vision who had remained all the time in silence.

A week had passed and, not having received any new letters, Lilith forgot what had happened, thinking that it was just a joke.

But the girl had to change her mind when she entered the school library and, in the place where she always sat, she found a black scroll rolled on itself and tied with a piece of emerald fabric.

She looked around trying to figure out who might have left it there but soon realized that she was the only person in the library at the moment.

Lilith hesitated a bit before taking away the emerald fabric before opening the black scrolled.

The content left the girl speechless: it was another poem written for her.

I can see how you are beautiful

Can you feel my eyes on you

I see reflection of me in your eye

You touch me in many, many ways

Obsessed by you, your looks

Well, anyway

"I would destroy the world if you were hurt, Lilith"

Lilith had been speechless.

Who wrote that letter? Why were the letters always left anonymously?

She had no answer to any of these questions so she decided to sit down and think better about who might be the author of those poems.

Maybe this time he left some clues by accident.

More than two hours passed and Lilith had not yet found any clue that could lead her to the author of the poems. The girl snorted slightly away from the chair where she was sitting slightly from the table in front of her. Deciding to focus on something else, the girl hid the scroll in her favorite book, before studying for the exams that she would have to face in the following days. It was evening and Loki had not seen his best friend since that morning when they had met to have breakfast together. Concerned about Lilith, the boy decided to go and find Wanda to ask her if she had any news of the girl, and when he found her, she told him that she had not seen her since that morning but that he would probably find her in the library studying. Loki nodded hsi head and quickly went to the library.

There he found Lilith asleep on her school books. Shaking his head slightly, Loki approached where she was. The boy stared at her for a few seconds before stroking her hair and then leaning his hand on her shoulder, lightly shaking her and waking her up. "You fell asleep again, you know," Loki asked her with a smirk on his face. "Shut up Loki" she grumbled making her friend chuckle. "Come on, go to bed. It’s late" the guy ordered her before heading towards the door leaving Lilith alone.

His secret admirer decided to remain silent until one fateful evening. It was only a week before Yule’s ball. Lilith had arranged with Wanda to go there with her. Lilith had decided to wear a long green dress, with a dark green bodice, which she was trying on in her room at that time. The girl was admiring herself in the mirror when she saw a letter appear on her pillow. But, this time, the letter appeared different from the others. Lilith ran to her bed to take the letter noting that the color of the paper was different. It was no longer black, but it was bream, but the letters remained emerald. The girl did not analyze the letter for a long time preferring to read its contents. Solitude’s upon my skin A Life that’s bound by the chains of reality Would you let me be your Endymion? Bathe in your moonlight and slumber in peace Enchanted by your kiss in forever sleep I live for that night Come to the garden in 30 minutes, you’ll find me there waiting for you.

Lilith couldn’t believe her eyes, her secret admirer wanted to meet her that night. But there was only one problem, Lilith was still in love with Loki. Sighing slightly, the girl grew strong, deciding to meet her secret admirer to explain that his heart belonged to another. It was not long before the girl, after changing to something more comfortable, headed to the meeting place repeating in her head the speech that she had prepared for when she would be face to face with the boy. Minutes passed before Lilith found herself at the meeting place, looking around for her secret admirer. It was not long before he saw a figure, a little in the distance, illuminated only by the light of the moon. "You have finally arrived" a boy whispered in her ear and, at that moment, Lilith saw the figure disappear and felt some hands taking her back. But the thing that most confused her was the voice of the boy who whispered in her ear, she knew that voice. The girl turned around only to find herself in front of her best friend who smiled at her. "Darling-" was the only thing Loki could say before Lilith started crying and then suddenly hugging him. "You idiot!" she said with her face hidden in her chest.

"Don’t cry pet, please" he Softly asked her before taking her chin between her thumb and index finger making her look into his eyes. "I’m sorry if I haven’t told you sooner but I wanted to court you properly" "But-but But I saw you that night with that Ravenclaw girl that night and-" Loki stopped her by cupping her face with both of his hands before kissing her. "Stop your rumbling and let me explain. I thought that you weren’t interested in me, not in a romantic way, so I tried to distract myself in another way by dating other girls. But nobody could ever be as special as you. And then, one day, I heard you talking with Wanda about me and I heard you saying that you love me. I love you Lilith and I want you to go with me to Yule’s ball. Would you be the princess of this prince" Lilith did not hesitate for a second before carrying her arms around Loki’s neck and kissing him shortly thereafter. "I would love to" she whispered on his lips.

[bellesque]

Sweet Dreams (Loki x Reader)

Part 7: Sight

Read on AO3.

Spotify playlist here.

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 4.3K

Warnings/Tags: Mirror Sex, Fingering, Dirty Talk, Bondage, Masturbation, basic filth y’all know, and some Angst gasp

A/N: This was a beast to write. Can’t believe there’s only one chapter left after this. Thanks for being along this filthy ride.

* * *

“HEY. SEX EYES.”

Your attention snaps up immediately. “Hm?”

She gives you a look. Shit. Busted. You plaster on a look of feigned obliviousness.

Isla sips her margarita, eyebrows lifted, and then takes extra interest in setting it down. Guilt gnaws at you. Did you pay attention to anything she just said? No. Are you going to let her know? Not if you can get away with it.

You don’t, though. Barely anything slips past Isla, from information to a change in energy. The prolonged pause makes you nervous, but you do your best not to show it.

“Sex eyes,” she says simply, examining her nails. Her gray irises flit to you, and she cocks her head to the side. “You’ve got the sex eyes.”

“What does that even mean?”

“You’re thinking about a good lay. Or getting laid. You literally just zoned out because you were thinking about sex!”

“Isla!” you shush her quickly, before the elderly couple a few tables down has a chance to throw you a dirty look. Your cheeks burn, and Isla’s eyes widen as she realizes she wasn’t off the mark.

“Oh my gosh. Wait, I was like, half-kidding.” Her face splits into a grin and she slaps your leg under the table. “I knew it!” she hisses.

“Isla!”

“So who is he?”

It’s a little amusing to see her cool, calculated façade crumble as soon as she discovers you’ve been seeing someone—well, you’re using the term loosely here. But. Still.

She doesn’t even let you speak before she barrels on. “He’s gotta be like. A total hunk since you turned down Jake for him, right? Right? Holy shit, woman, tell me!”

Tell her what, exactly? That you’re “seeing” someone who only comes at midnight, specifically when you’re asleep?

“It… he’s a… secret,” you mumble.

“Secret?” Isla lets out an exaggerated gasp. “No way. Nuh uh. No secrets between us.”

“He’s a little… bashful,” you try, shrugging your shoulders. Is it hot out here? You specifically picked a table with good shade, but you’re heating up. You grab your drink in the hopes of cooling off a bit.

“Doesn’t mean you have to be,” she pouts childishly, crossing her arms as she leans back against the wicker lawn chair. “Fine.”

A pause.

“Is the sex good?”

“Isla!”

“What? Can’t blame me for trying. For all I know you’re a kinky bitch under all that office wear.” She wags her eyebrows at you suggestively. You roll your eyes in response. Another sip. Another hope that she won’t notice that she, once again, has hit the nail right on the head.

“He is real, right? You’re not just messing with me?”

“Of course,” you reply instantly, a thin wall of defensiveness going up. “What makes you think he isn’t?”

“You’re literally telling me nothing.”

“I don’t have to tell you anything.”

“Yeah, but I tell you everything!”

“Even the things I don’t want to know,” you mutter. Isla pouts again.

“Fine. It’s fine. My best friend knows that she can tell me when she feels ready. And I, as her best friend, will be just as welcoming and accepting as I always am. Unless of course. He’s a troll or something. Then we can hide his body together. But one day, my best friend will tell me. Every little kinky, pornstar-worthy detail.” She wrinkles her nose in afterthought. “Ew. Okay maybe not every kinky, porny detail. But you get it!”

You manage a weak beam, but your lunch date with Isla goes on with a rock in the pit of your stomach. It’s only on your way back to work that you acknowledge and confront the feelings you’ve been suppressing for the longest time. Not the ones that surfaced because of Isla’s prying—but the ones that have been swimming just beneath the surface, opening up into a vortex of heavy thoughts.

It’s like you’ve grown… attached. There’s an emotion somewhere, one whose name comes closest to yearning, and it’s tearing you apart. On the one hand: he’s an incubus. He’s somewhere between fact and fiction, and obviously having the hots for a something rather than a someone proves to have its issues… but what if?

What if he were real, more than just a sex demon? More human, more capable of emotions other than lust and desire?

Damn. Get it together. No need to get all soft. It’s just sex.

(But it lingers: what if it could be more than that?)

 --

The silk ties are gone.

The corner where they usually sit is bare. You don’t consider yourself an overly observant person by any means, but you’ve gotten so used to seeing the smooth shine out of the corner of your eye that it feels just the slightest bit off when it’s not calling out to your subconscious.

Where… where did they go?

A sharp shiver runs down your shoulders when you realize it could be because you won’t be needing them tonight. You’ll be seeing him.

How is he going to go about it? Surely as teasing and drawn out as he always is, but where would he even begin? Would he ask you to undress for him, peel off each garment layer by layer? Would he be the one to do so?

Tonight feels like such an occasion that part of you wants to prepare somehow. It’s been a while since you’ve gotten excited to get ready for something.

Ah, fuck, if you’re too excited again, does that mean you’re not going to sleep?

It’s whatever. You’ll deal with it later.

Along with the possible emotional repercussions you dread will arise.

-- -- --

Surprisingly, you’re out like a light. The lightest shifting of your duvet is what wakes you.

“Just as I suspected.” Loki’s silky voice is right by your ear. “You really are a vixen, sleeping naked like this.”

Your eyelids flutter open to see Loki kneeling over you, a seductive smirk on his face. His green eyes rake over your figure hungrily, flitting from the duvet that covers your lower half to the halo of hair around your head. He trails his fingers along the curve of your jaw. “What were you planning to do, pet?” he murmurs. “Seduce me into your bed before I’d had my fun?”

You give him a sleepy smile, sleep-hooded eyes fixated on his mouth. “I’m the fun,” you counter boldly, slowly pushing your bare breasts towards him.

“That you are.” He trails his hand down to your breast now, giving it a gentle squeeze and a tug. “But. It’s so much fun to play with you, sweet.”

Your breathing shallows, eyelids dipping to where his fingertip lingers on your peaked nipple. It’s so easy. So natural for you to slip into this hypnotized, seduced state, willing and wanting for lack of a better description.

His touch ghosts back up over your neck, skimming lightly over your jaw as he leans towards you. “Are you ready?” he asks, his head tipping to one side. He closes his eyes and nuzzles his nose against the hollow of your cheekbone. “At long last.”

You crane your neck to the side, back arching, rising up to feel the length of his body closer to you. You will have him skin-to-skin tonight, eyes open through all of it, and a fiery bolt of excitement floods your core.

His silk suit has never felt more irksome than it does now. A barrier between you that you wish you could just rip away and have him then and there. He’s made you wait long enough, damn it. You need his cock, now.

But Loki loves to leave you in that state of anticipation, it seems. His fingers dip beneath the duvet and trail all over your naked flesh, purposefully avoiding your sopping cunt, but stimulating you just enough to make your chest rise and fall faster.

And fuck, if his expression isn’t intoxicating as it is. The way he studies you so intently—the darkness in his eyes, the way his tongue darts out when he sees how hard your nipples are. He’s barely even begun, and he’s already ruining you.

“I’d like to kiss you now,” he says lowly, darkened eyes flicking up to meet your own. “May I?”

Your answer is an urgent pressing of your mouth against his, warm and desperate and longing.

And Loki doesn’t kiss you—whatever he’s doing now, calling it mere kissing would be a disservice. It’s dizzying, consuming, possessive, every bite on your lip and suck on your tongue. There’s no way you can hold it in when you moan into his mouth.

Loki pulls away, his grip tightening around the base of your neck—fuck, when did his hand end up there?—and breathlessly he mutters into you, “Do that again. Moan for me.”

His mouth captures yours in another earth-stopping kiss, and you oblige him.

And he moans too.

By the time he pulls away, finishing with open-mouthed pecks and his tongue swiping against your mouth, you’re positive your lips are swollen and flushed the deepest shade of red. The look in his eyes tells you plainly tonight has just begun.

You reach out for him, eager for another kiss, maybe two—

The bloody fucker has restrained you. Both hands, tied to the headboard.

You say his name in what is supposed to be mild confusion, but it comes out more breathy and wanton. Damn him.

“I want you to watch me.”

Oh, fuck.

Loki gets off the bed, transfixed on your naked form all the while, and… and, well, begins stripping.

“Watch me,” Loki says sharply when he sees your eyes nearly roll back when you shudder.

And so you do. Maybe it’s because your breasts rise and fall in your periphery while you’re fucking tied up—which is somehow super fucking erotic—or because he’s watching you watch him with such a burning intensity, but even without showing an inch of skin, Loki has you, a whimpering mess, in the palm of his hand.

And then finally—fucking finally—you see him in all his bare glory.

Your jaw drops when you see his cock: swollen with blood, erect and leaking copious amounts of precum it’s obscene.

“I want you… to watch…”

His fingers clasp around his shaft, stroking himself in long, languid pumps. Your mouth waters, your tongue darting out to wet your lips.

Wet. It’s what you are, it’s what Loki’s dick is. Somehow you don’t know where to look—into his eyes that seem to fuck you, or at his mouth that’s slowly parting and moving soundlessly from his restrained groans, or at his flushed and leaking cock that hangs heavy in his hand. You squirm, your cunt fluttering in need.

Your attention eventually focuses on his ministrations, the mesmerizing way he touches and strokes himself. Loki drags his hand over his shaft at an excruciatingly slow pace and keeps it up for a good while before he starts speeding up, his quiet breaths growing more labored and his abdomen visibly tensing as he ruts more firmly into his fist.

“Fuck,” you say softly, your core muscles rhythmically clenching now as you imagine it’s your cunt. Have you been clenching all the while Loki pleasures himself in front of you—for you?

“I would love to,” he husks. Loki advances, radiating pure sex.

And then he cums—hard. Spurt after spurt of white rope splattering warmth over your bare stomach, and it’s only when he rubs over the head of his cock do you realize your breathing through an open mouth.

“Did you want it in your mouth, sweet?” Loki smirks, caressing your cum-smattered stomach, drawing a line between the valley of your breasts. He holds out his finger in front of you, and suddenly it’s like his cum and your mouth are the only thing in existence. “Do you want it?”

Words don’t come easily to you; instead you battle the restraints, uncaring of the wanton way your tongue stretches out of your mouth, desperate to taste him. Loki pulls his finger away for you to huff in need, until he’s decided he’s had enough torturing you and shoves his thumb into your mouth.

You suck on it greedily, tongue swirling around him, keeping your eyes locked on his. Eye contact. You want him to want you. You want him to see how much you want him.

Almost reluctantly, his finger leaves the warmth of your mouth, dragging your lower lip down subtly before he brings the pad of his thumb back over his slit. Loki hisses, eyes snapping shut as he thumbs his hard cockhead.

Fuck.

“I cannot wait,” he says hoarsely, fingers rubbing his head, “I must have you now.”

The anticipation within you is almost like an out of body experience. Your limbs move of their own accord as soon as they’re let out of their restraints, and fuck when your bare bodies touch, it’s fucking fire. Your blood is fire, your skin is fire.

And the best part is, you can see him. Through the haze of your eyelashes as you kiss his mouth fiercely, it’s evident he’s enjoying this just as much—if not more—as you are. Eyes shut, cock hard, hands needy. So fucking needy.

Loki starts necking you, bringing you flush against his (completely and deliciously naked) skin with a hand kneading your ass. And there it is, that stimulation—the way he palms the flesh and smacks it to deliver the most sensual and near illicit shockwaves to your clit.

You’re panting pretty heavily now, hands fisted tight in Loki’s dark waves. The moment you tug on it unconsciously is when he seems to break from whatever spell he’s under. He kisses the bruise that’s now forming on your neck, thumbing your nipples as he smolders up at you.

“Turn around,” he rasps, and the breathiness in his voice makes you a little proud.

Being on your knees, it doesn’t take very long for you to do a 180. At least, it shouldn’t. But the sex-crazed part of you puts on a show for him: a subtle jut of your ass, an arch of your back to let your breasts bounce enticingly for him. And it works, sort of—the corner of Loki’s mouth lifts up in a challenged smirk and he pulls your hips, your back colliding with his chest.

“Look at you,” he says, nose brushing the helix of your ear. “At us.”

At first, you aren’t sure what he means… until you see the mirror on the side of the room, reflecting your flushed and naked body pulled against his. It stretches from the ceiling all the way to the floor, displaying in crystal clear quality, you and Loki entwined in a tangle of sweat-sheened limbs.

Loki straddles you from behind, his head angled intently towards you as he strokes the sides of your breasts. “Open those legs, sweet, and eyes on that delicious cunt.”

You spread your knees wider, half-kneeling, half-saddled against Loki’s lap, inching apart until the flushed rosy pink of your cunt peeks between your legs. Instead of embarrassment flooding you as you thought it would, you’re simply turned on.

“Would you like to touch yourself?” Loki nips at your neck in the reflection, eyes shut as his lips brush against you, barely pulling away when he speaks. His voice is nothing more than a deep resonance in your chest. “Or shall I?”

“Please,” you whisper, entranced at the vision of Loki sucking another bruise into your neck, that sweet spot that makes your legs turn to jelly.

His hands begin to toy with your breasts, and you shudder, folding into his touch. “Please what?”

“Touch me.”

Loki says nothing. At this point, you just want to cum. From his cock or his fingers, right now it doesn’t matter—all you crave is release that comes from his doing. After being blindfolded for so long, you finally get the chance to memorize this moment, imprint it into your consciousness forever.

His hands roll and tease your nipples until you let out an impatient whine, to which Loki punishes (or rewards?) you with a sharp squeeze at your breast. And then his palm slides down, down, centimeter by centimeter, your knees fruitlessly trying to get even further apart.

You’re on the verge of babbling sexual pleas, you’re sure of it. Close to begging for his fingers, his touch; his tongue, his cock. Loki chuckles—shit, did you say all that out loud?

Without so much as a warning, Loki slips a finger inside you. Entirely finesse, like it’s the most natural response to babble in the world. Like it’s the only way to shut you up—which, probably, if your moan is any indication, it is.

It becomes increasingly difficult for you to keep your eyes open; they insist on rolling back whenever his fingers brush against your clit. But it’s so hot, so fucking hot, to be riding—when did your hips start moving?—his fingers, watching how they disappear into your cunt with a soft squelch.

And then his fingers curl into your G-spot, and you convulse involuntarily.

“Stay,” Loki orders roughly, mouth closing around the index finger of his free hand. He stimulates your clit further with the heel of the hand that fingers you, and rolls your nipple in his spit-covered fingers.

The crescendo of pleasure in your body is barely containable; your moan is throaty as you buck onto his hand, and Loki rewards you with another pleasurable squeeze. So hot. Your body is consumed by the wildfire of pleasure, chasing the white hot flame of release.

“Loki—” you can’t help it, you tilt your head and give him a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss, “—Loki, fuck, I’m gonna cum like this—”

“Then cum, sweet.” Loki’s fingers pump you deeper, curling inside you. His breath is so warm, so hot against your neck. “Cum for me.”

And you do. Shockingly fast, and strong, your body spasming so much that Loki has to hold you close. You watch, dissociated from yourself, as your body jolts with the aftershocks of pleasure. Like the image that’s in front of you isn’t actually you—spent and panting and wanton, pussy dark red and fluttering and proud.

Loki kisses you as you ride out your high, just barely moving his fingers inside you. It’s never been like this. Multiple orgasms are achievable, but with Loki… oh, mercy. How is he able to keep you in such a constant state of arousal, hungry even when you should be sated?

And then… then you register it. You don’t, not at first, too blissfully unaware of whatever else is happening outside your mouth slotting against his, his lips suctioning around the tip of your tongue—but when it happens, you freeze. You can’t believe—is it happening, you really ask yourself, as Loki shifts behind you and positions the head of his cock at your sopping entrance.

Fuck, his precum mingles with your cum, and it’s the fucking hottest thing you’ve ever felt, your body buzzing in preparation for what you’ve been daydreaming about for the longest time.

Your eyes are hyperfocused on the shadow of where your sexes meet, mouth hanging open as you watch in rapture the way he disappears into your folds.

It’s only when he bottoms out, does the way he stretches and fills you so perfectly actually register in your mind and body.

Fucking full is what you are.

Loki’s face is buried in the crook of your neck, breathing heavy as his cock fucking twitches inside you. You stay that way, both of you still as a statue, until Loki commands in a hungry whisper, “Ride me.”

And you do, all the while watching your body and the way it molds against his. His cock disappearing inside you, your walls fitting and dragging against the contour and ridges of every part of him. It’s fucking hypnotizing. Up. His cock glistens with your mingled juices. Down. Your pussy swallows him inch by inch. Up. You clench as you rise, particularly unforgiving when you’re around just his cockhead. Down. You add a little swivel to your hips as Loki bottoms out.

He growls a curse underneath his breath.

I want to make you cum. You gyrate more forcefully now, movements losing whatever elegance they held before. I want you to cum inside me.

“Keep thinking that, and I just might,” Loki groans, fingers rubbing tight, short circles your clit.

“Then do it,” you whisper, clenching as you caress the side of his face. Loki lets out a guttural noise, and then he does something you don’t expect—he shoves you.

Not off of him. Thank fuck he doesn’t. But he forces you forward, firm and dominant, and you fall on your chest with a soft oomph.

“On your hands and knees, pet.” Loki's ceased all movements inside you, save for the brush of his fingers at your hips. But for some reason, you’re sure you can cum like this. Simply wrapped around him, snug and warm, tightening your muscles as the way to release.

As if he’s read your thoughts, Loki pulls out of you and then buries himself to the hilt. You cry out, Loki’s pace now a battering, brutally delicious fucking from behind.

You could stay like this. Face down on your bed that smells like sex, mouth hanging open, being fucked so good you’re fucking drooling. You close your eyes, focused on the sensation of his cock gliding, massaging, pounding into your walls at a speed you can only describe as ungodly.

Your hair is yanked up, not too hard to be considered anything more than pleasurable pain.

“Look at yourself,” Loki spits out, a restrained grunt following after. Your eyes flutter open, and you’re thoroughly turned on by the sight that greets you. Loki’s beautiful face contorted in a sex-crazed snarl, hips slamming into yours. Your ass jiggles with every thrust, and your breasts sway back and forth while you’re barely propped up on your elbows. Your mouth still hangs open, as if awaiting Loki’s next load. Shit. You want that. His cum down your throat.

Loki gives another tug at your hair. “Look at you, my little cock slut. All your dirty desires, all your fantasies and sex—brought to the surface. Here, with me.” Loki groans again, speeding up his thrusts. Slap. Slap. Slap. “Do you like how I fuck you? Hmm? Answer me.”

Loki spanks you. A short, pleasurable sting that pushes you closer to release. Your eyebrows crease together—fuck, you won’t last long, not with the way his hand rubs soothing circles over where he slaps you. “Yes,” is your breathy answer.

Another slap. Another caress. “Louder, pet. Do you like—” he rolls his hips deeper into you, his cock riding just right along your G-spot, shit, “—how I fuck you?”

Fuuuuuck. The pleasure builds, and builds, and you buck against him as you moan another yes.

“Then cum,” he orders. Slapslapslapslap—Loki grunts, plowing into you at a such a precise speed, you can barely keep up. “Cum now, for me. Only for me.”

With a wail of his name and your head falling forward against the mattress, you cum, whole body convulsing as you pant loudly through an open mouth. So good. You clench around him as you come down from your high, and his cock sliding in and out of you in a deliciously lazy rhythm sends you into the precipice of release once more.

“Loki—” you can’t keep your eyes open anymore, but you grind against his hardening length, “—I’m gonna cum again.”

“Wait for me.” He grunts, his chest falling on your back as his hands find and knead your breasts. “I’m close.”

Somehow. Something in those two words—or maybe in the way that he says it—makes you pause in your movements. He doesn’t stop, not in the slightest, chasing his own release while you stave off yours. But… there’s something that strikes a chord in you. One that unravels a thread of thoughts and emotions wound tight, tucked away in some deep corner of your mind in favor of enjoyable, no-strings-attached sex.

But you want strings.

You want him to be more than just a sex machine. More than just a dream. Someone who actually fucking exists and hopefully, has a heart that loves as well as he fucks. But the reality is—this isn’t. This isn’t your reality, just some dream-sexcapade for a week.

You’re not gonna cry. Fuck it, you’re not going to. You’re going to enjoy every bit of tonight, damn it, have as many orgasms as you can, and you’re going to feel nothing but lust and pleasure and wake up with the glow of sex.

Loki slaps your ass again, jolting you back to his steady fucking behind you. Your hands gripping sheets, knuckles white, you say in a surprisingly steady voice, “Fuck me harder.”

His breathing hitches, and he spreads your legs further apart, bending you so it’s just your ass in the air meeting him thrust for thrust.

And fuck, does he thrust.

He’s muttering, quiet affirmations, dirty nothings, hands traveling up and down your spine—and when you clench, the first ropes of his seed sear a blaze of fire within your walls, making it easy for you to follow in release.

Before he can pull out completely, though, you summon your strength, and push Loki on his back while you swivel on his cock—earning another groan from his end—plant your hands on his chest, and look at him.

Memorizing.

Burning it into memory.

You bend forward to kiss him, hips circling over his still-hard cock.

One more night.

Just tonight.

Tonight, you’ll have the sweetest fucking dream you’ve ever had.

* * *

Masterlist

Consider buying me a coffee?

Sweet Dreams Tag List (OPEN): @shiningloki @imnotrevealingmyname @wolfsmom1 @hanyasnape @cheriesugarr @toozmanykids @rorybutnotgilmore @myraiswack @green-valkyrie @hiddlesgoddess

[bladedweaponsandswishycoats]

Wei Wuxian felt the breach of Cloud Recesses' wards first. He laid his brush down and set the stack of half-graded night hunt reports aside before rising to go look for the guest. As he stepped outside, he noted the lack of any special response among the Lan disciples passing by. Ah, so it's you. This particular visitor had figured out how to avoid triggering the general protections, but not the special additions Wei Wuxian had added, which meant it could only be one person (in the general sense—Wei Wuxian knew this guest wasn't human).

Wei Wuxian's method of searching was a simple yet effective one. He merely asked himself where would I go, if I wanted to cause the maximum amount of (mostly harmless) chaos from simply appearing? It was summer, so the obvious answer was, of course, the Lanshi.

He stepped into the hall to find the entire class of visiting disciples with swords drawn, poised to attack the figure in green at the center of the room. Lan Qiren's glare was fixed firmly on the figure too, though at Wei Wuxian's entrance he said, sharply, "Wei Wuxian."

There was a certain amount of whispering and a few worried glances in his direction from some of the disciples, but Wei Wuxian ignored them, surveying the room. "Ah, right. Okay everyone, I'm sorry about the interruption." He strode forward, nudging a few of the disciples to lower their swords. For all the hostile looks and drawn weapons, the guest stood casually, looking remarkably relaxed, considering. Of course he did.

Turning to Wei Wuxian, the guest grinned and and said, "Ah, there you are!" Looking back at Lan Qiren, he gestured, "See? I told you."

"Wei Wuxian, this individual has claimed to be your guest and to have arrived here by means of an experimental talisman you're testing. Is this true?"

Wei Wuxian saluted Lan Qiren and replied, "I have been working on transport talismans, but there are still a few problems with them. My apologies for this disruption. We'll just…be going now." Wei Wuxian dragged the guest out before Lan Qiren could pick up on his entirely truthful deception.  

"Ah, their faces! It was fantastic." The guest was still laughing as he caught up to walk alongside Wei Wuxian.

"I'm sure. You could have just come to the Jingshi; you know where it is."

"Ah, but this was more fun!"

"You just like causing problems." Wei Wuxian rolled his eyes.

The guest was untroubled by this, replying easily, "What, like you don't? Besides, someone needs to keep you on your toes."

***

Pouring tea, Wei Wuxian glanced up. "What?" he asked, catching the guest's expression.

"I can't believe you didn't even introduce me!"

"I didn't introduce you because I know for a fact you would have introduced yourself—probably dramatically, along with your entrance—already. That's the first reason."

"And the second?"

"Well, I have no idea who you're here as today, do I? Or what you want, besides making extra work for me."

The guest stood up and bowed elaborately.  "Ah well, we can't have that. I, Loki, God of Asgard, King of Jotunheim, Goddess of Story, am here to request the help of the great Yiling Laozu, of course." He straightened up. "How do you feel about helping out some demonic cultivators in other universes? There are Narratives that need fucking with."

Wei Wuxian crossed his arms. He was going to say yes, of course (because of the fun, but also after what Loki had done for this universe... it was the least he could do), but the request was still curious.

"What do you need me for? You're the Storyteller, can't you just—" he waved a hand to indicate Loki's powers in general.

"Eh, technically. But it's easier to shift people between universes and work within them using preexisting powers than it is to manipulate the universes from the outside by sheer force of will. Not to mention, the raw re-writing really only works perfectly if there's a version of me in the universe already. And for these universes, there isn't. Or not a strong enough one for me to link up with. Besides…" He paused, looking a touch uncertain for the first time.

"What?"

"One of the universes has a situation I think would benefit from certain skills your brother possesses."

Wei Wuxian blinked. "You want Jiang Cheng to come universe hopping with us, to help out some demonic cultivators?" he asked, to check.

"Well, it's really Zidian I need, but I assumed that means asking him." He thought for a moment, "Actually, the more, the merrier. Would your husband come?"

Wei Wuxian leaned back. "You'd better tell me more about it."

Loki smiled. Setting down his teacup, he began. "So, the first situation is in a place called Sunnydale…"

Notes:

This includes Loki as he appears in Marvel comics, where he has 4th wall-breaking powers of rewriting his own story, so to some degree these are canon powers.

This takes place in a canon divergent post-canon AU where Loki came and helped meddle with the CQL narrative in ways that resulted in a number of canon deaths not occurring. (I will eventually write that part out too...)

[dirt-cup-draco]

Loki x Reader- My Heart, My Home

“Am I doing this right? How do I make this cursed looking glass view me as it is with you?” Came Loki’s voice, unclear and breaking up through the speaker from your phone. You reclined on your bed and smiled fondly at his pixelated form as he switched the camera from a view of a couch to his face. He was peering into the camera as if he could make it focus by sheer will alone. It seemed even his great (as he reminded you constantly) magical skill couldn’t make facetime work properly on a poor WiFi connection. 

“Oh yeah, perfectly,” You teased, sticking out your tongue at him as he tilted his phone side to side, changing the angles from which you saw him. You couldn’t help but be twitterpated, even from the vague outline of your boyfriend on your cracked phone screen. 

“I sense some sarcasm my love,” Loki muttered and suddenly there was a dull thud, the room he was in blurring even more as he dropped his cellphone to the ground. You knew getting him one had been a bad idea, but you hadn’t liked the idea of hollering at the sun and stars every time you needed him. He’d been put out but had decided a phone could have some practical uses. 

“I would never be sarcastic with you,” You gasped, pressing your hand to your chest as Loki righted his phone again, no doubt gripping it tighter this time. You missed holding his hand. You frowned slightly as you thought of all the time that had passed since you’d last seen him. 

He was helping Thor with something or the other and had been very busy. You weren’t really sure how time zones in different realms worked either so it was a hit and miss when you called or texted him. Part of you was certain half the struggle was just because Loki wasn’t sure how to text back. 

“I miss you,” You sighed. You were hoping for a sweet response, maybe something flirty, hell you’d even accept his stupid holier-than-thou teasing.

What you hadn’t expected was a confused, “Wait, Y/N, darling, I can’t- I can’t hear you,” Loki’s eyebrows were drawn to the center of his forehead and you saw him poke the camera- once, twice- before he was peering back at his screen in confusion. “Say something,” He demanded.

“Loki?” You tried, your frown now much more apparent. You don’t know why you thought this would go smoothly. 

“Y/N-” Loki began but was cut short, his screen pausing with his mouth half open and eyelids falling closed at different points. You couldn’t help but screenshot the ridiculous ordeal. He was frozen. 

Sighing in frustration you ended the call and went straightaway to texting him. 

“That was miserable, I’m sorry,” You pounded out on the keyboard, adding a string of emojis that you knew that Loki wouldn’t understand. Why do you need an emoticon of a caterpillar? Are these not used to express emotion? I doubt you know how it feels to be an insect. He had pointed out one day but quickly quieted when you reminded him that he had indeed called you an insect upon your first meeting.

“When will you be home?” You texted, pouting. You knew Loki wouldn’t be up for facetiming again, growing quickly frustrated with the foolishness of it all. 

“It’s file

It’s phone

It Is Fins

FINE IT IS FINE YOU BLASTED DEVICE” Came his eloquent response. You were glad to see he had found the speech to text function.

“Soon.” Was his short response and you grumbled, tossing your phone to the other side of you bed as you took a calming breath. You knew he couldn’t help it but you missed him terribly and you just wanted him here and in your arms. 

“I love you. Try and sleep, you get grumpy if you don’t ,” You finally responded after dressing and brushing your teeth. You felt guilty for not responded immediately and now you stared at the screen with unblinking eyes as you turned out your lamp. Five minutes passed, then ten. No bubble popped up alerting you that he had seen the text and was responding. 

You hopped he was already trying to sleep. He constantly argued he didn’t need it and his body functioned on much higher levels than that of a mortal’s yet he got crabbier than you did when he didn’t get a proper night’s rest. 

Sniffling softly you tried to ignore the burn behind your eyelids. Good god, you felt clingy. It had only been a month or so but before he had gone, you two had practically been spending every waking moment together. He was a pain in the ass, but he was your pain in the ass and you’d been lonely in his absence.

You brought your sheets tight up around your chin and tried to cancel out all of your thoughts and focus on your mindless breathing. Your body fell into the stage between sleep, feeling simultaneously like you were floating and sinking as you snuggled deeper into the warm sheets. You let out a lengthy and relaxing breath, the rest of your tension leaving you as your mind went blank and fuzzy. Sleep was claiming you and you would be it’s captor in but a moment. 

“Miss me?”

Your eyes popped open and you shrieked as an arm curled around your waist. You rolled out of the sudden intruder’s grip and ended up over correcting. One second you were pulling up to dream land, then next you were stunned on the floor of your bedroom with your sheets wrapped around your ankles. A sharp laugh echoed through the room and warm, familiar, hands pulled you up and set you back on your bed. 

“You fucking ass! You nearly gave me a heart attack!” You yelled, stuck in your disbelief and unable to process that Loki was home and standing before you like he hadn’t been worlds away an hour ago. 

He only grinned and crawled onto the bed, sitting beside you and offering his hand, palm up, to you. “So glad to be home, darling,” Loki teased but you could see the adoration in his eyes as you set your hand in his. His slim fingers encased your hand in a comfort that you had been longing for. 

Biting your lip to hold back your tears you gripped his hand tighter and pulled as hard as you could. Loki fell forward with the force of it and you wrapped your arm around his neck as he righted you both with some effort. Soon, you were straddling his lap with your face buried in his neck. He drew fanciful patterns on your back with his fingertips as the tension you hadn’t been able to rid yourself of melted away at his magical touch.

“What are you doing here?” You croaked, trying to keep the emotion from your voice and failing miserably. 

Loki smiled into your hair, kissing the side of your head. “I told you I’d be home soon,” 

“I didn’t know you’d be home this soon,” 

“You didn’t reply to my textual message until much later and I worried that something was the matter. Besides, it was time to come home and my brother can now handle things himself.” Loki knew for a fact that it was a text message and not “textual” but the resulting laugh from you was well worth playing dumb. Thor had been teaching him a great deal about technology but you seemed to enjoy being the one to help him that he pretended he was none the wiser. 

“It’s text message babe,” You pointed out quickly before admitting,“I did miss you a lot though and I was feeling a bit lonely. I guess I got frustrated over the stupid video chat, I just wish it had gone better. I’m sorry I made you worry,” 

Yet those feelings were gone out the window now. Especially after he declared that it was time to come home.

“I could travel back to my brother’s land and we can attempt this facetiming one more time if it will please you, my queen,” 

“Oh god, no. Having you here is much better,” You chuckled, kissing his pulse point and delighting in the way his arms tightened around you in a small loss of restraint. 

“Of course it is, I’m a delight,” 

“Yes, you are,” You hummed in agreement, too pleased with his surprise arrival to poke fun at his false enormous ego. 

Loki smiled, a soft smile full of awe and love. One you couldn’t see, but one that you could feel from the way his heart skipped a single beat and the temperature of his cheeks raised slightly despite his naturally cold skin. 

“I love you,” He spoke softly. Like it was still somehow a secret. Like you didn’t know through all of his adoring actions and gentle touches that he wasn’t completely enraptured by you. Those three words never failed to leave you breathless when they came from his lips.

“I love you too,” You mimicked, your limbs growing heavy with sleep as Loki pulled the blankets around you two as pajamas appeared on his body. With a simple kiss to your forehead, he soothed you into a dreamless rest. 

Finally, your heart, your love, had returned home. 

Tag List: @angelinathebook @thehumanistsdiary @cleopatera

[lov3nerdstuff]

White Queen

*Loki x reader*

Parts: Oneshot

Words: 5.9k (hell, I just can't write short stuff anymore)

Warnings: none

Request: Not a request, but a gift to the lovely @beenthroughalot who I absolutely dedicate this to 💚✨

Summary: When Tony Stark throws a costume party, you need to come up with an idea. Quickly. So why not take the god of mischief costume shopping? He seems eager enough to help. Yet, you dressing up as the white queen for the night makes Loki painfully aware that he would prefer you to be his queen indeed.

A.N.: Sorry I still suck at summaries... 💗✨ This is basically Loki realizing that every darkness needs a bit of light and every light a bit of darkness. Fluff! 💚 Also, this is referring to the white queen from Alice in Wonderland!

______________________________

Chilled morning air flooded your lungs, crisp in a way that soothed your ever troubled mind and bearing the tiniest droplets of water, in the gentle transition from dawn's fog to noon's impending rain. You inhaled deeply, closing your eyes in bliss at this little piece of gloomy autumn solitude. It had been a rough night, filled with nightmares and pictures you tried to lock out of your mind for all times, finally leaving behind anxiety ridden thoughts in their downward spiral.

But the little shiver, the goosebumps this breath of morning air brought to your heated skin gently reminded you that you were alive, breaking through a deep water's surface after almost drowning.

The pleasant smell of moist soil, wet withered leaves in every color you could wish for, mingled with the scent of freshly brewed coffee and you inevitably had to smile as you stood on your little balcony in the Avengers base. Maybe having a room right above the kitchen did have its perks, after all.

It was early still. The only people up at sunrise would be Tony, probably the person currently making coffee in the room beneath you, Steve, probably working out in the gym, you, most definitely freezing, and Loki… And who knew what Loki was up to at any time of the day.

You sighed. Thinking of the god brought both a smile and a frown to your face. He had been living in the room next to yours for a little over a year now, and you had found yourself drawn to him from the very first day. Not only were his eloquence and sophistication traits you could spend eternities delving into, but they also made him the only person in the team who was even remotely able to keep up with you, to interest you and understand the intricate ways of your mind.

After a few weeks of being around him more and more, as you were the only person he would willingly spend time with, you had grown to admire the entirety of Loki's being. The way he saw the world, the way he thought and expressed those thoughts to you… it all drew you to him with an increasing force. Like a black hole that swallowed every last bit of light, Loki dared to consume your every thought and you found yourself unable to resist, to stay away even if it would be for the better. You doubted that he would have any romantic interest in you (why would he, after all?), only allowing you to dwell in his presence because he deemed you the most bearable, the lesser evil.

But you were proud that he seemed to enjoy talking to you, that you were the only person he really talked to at all, and maybe that just had to be enough.

"Good morning." Loki's smooth voice startled you, causing you to jump and grab onto the railing so tightly that your knuckles turned white.

Your head whipped around for your eyes to meet his as he was standing on his own balcony, a few feet away from yours, looking over at you with an intrigued expression.

"Hey Loki…" You finally replied, giving him a small smile as you willed your heart to slow down. For whatever (not so miraculous) reason, it picked up speed every time he was close to you.

"I apologise for startling you, that wasn't my intention." He said calmly, and the depth of his voice brought another kind of shiver to your already chilled skin. "Are you cold?"

"Uh… yeah, a little." You shrugged, smiling at him once again. "But it's fine, I was just enjoying the fresh air after a rough night."

"Well, maybe you would like to join me in a venture to find some coffee, then?" He offered you a smile in return, raising an eyebrow at you in question.

"I'd really love to." You grinned back and after quickly putting on a loosely knitted cardigan, you met Loki in the hallway and together you made your way downstairs into the kitchen.

"Y/n! Up early as ever, aren't we?" Tony greeted you with a smirk as Loki and you entered the grand open space of the kitten.

"Hey Tony." You smiled back, taking two mugs out of the cupboard and handing one to Loki, who rolled his eyes at Stark's ignorance of his presence. It was always like this, and it had been from the very beginning: the team would mostly ignore Loki and if they didn't, Loki would ignore them instead.

"Have you gotten your costume ready yet?" Tony asked you as he absentmindedly scrolled through the news on his tablet.

"What costume?" You frowned as Loki poured steaming coffee into both your mugs, then adding a dash of milk to yours. It made you smile involuntarily that he knew just how you liked your coffee, and it didn't help at all with your frantic heartbeat that he took the time to prepare it for you.

"Well, I assumed you would be wearing a costume to the COSTUME party I'm hosting tonight." Tony frowned back at you, letting his gaze wander over your small frame first, then over Loki who was considerably taller and leaning against the counter next to you, sipping his coffee with a completely indifferent expression.

"Oh god, that's today?!" Your mouth dropped open as you looked at Tony in shock, then at Loki with a small frown. "I haven't even come up with an idea for a costume!"

"Well, you still have the whole day today to see to it." Tony shrugged, getting up from his barstool and sauntering to the door. "I'll be in the lab if you need help with anything… or some better company."

"Thanks, but I have Loki to help me and keep me company." You said a little too defensively for your own liking. It was true though, whenever you needed help with anything, you would always come to Loki first. Somehow… you knew that he would always be your safe haven, even if he'd deny it out of pride in his mischievous ways.

"Whatever…" Tony sighed before disappearing out of the room and thus from your sight.

"I'm not going to be of any help to you." Loki said as soon as he knew Tony would be out of earshot.

"What?" You turned to him in an instant, wide eyes filled with disappointment looking up at his calm ones. "Why not?"

"I'm not going to that party, first of all." He replied with a shrug. "And I am not good with costumes. I use magic for that kind of thing, and I have no knowledge about crafting costumes without it."

You frowned deeply and took a big sip of your coffee, burning your tongue on the still too hot liquid and hissing at the immediate pain and numbness that followed.

"Careful, darling…" Loki mused, in sincere concern rather than mockery, taking a sip of his own coffee while your skin tingled at the name he just called you. If only you hadn't fallen in love with him… maybe there would still be the chance to develop a real friendship.

"Well, I… I haven't ever been to a costume party before and I'm looking forward to dressing up." You said as neutrally as you could, crossing your arms in front of your chest as you pulled your cardigan tighter around yourself.

"I'm sorry if I have disappointed you, but I simply do not wish to spend the night with a group of people who despise me to the very essence of their being." He replied in the same calm as before, placing his empty mug in the sink before moving to stand in front of you. "I'm sure you will have a great time without me."

You looked at him with a forced smile, thinking about when his presence had become a requirement for your happiness. "I understand." But really, you didn't. Wasn't it enough for him that you would be there? Obviously not, and that knowledge hurt a lot more than you would've liked.

"I will be in my room, if you need me." He offered you a soft smile in return, one that was solemnly reserved for you, in the most private of moments. With a nod and a flutter of your heart, you let him go.

After taking a few minutes for yourself to get your emotions back under control, you actually felt ready to tackle the task at hand.

Even if Loki wouldn't be there to see you, you still wanted to have a fun night and an amazing costume that would leave people impressed.

Thus you returned to your room, getting dressed in something warm enough to withstand the increasingly cold and wet weather, before finally finding yourself in front of Loki's door yet again. A little reluctantly you knocked, then opened the door a tiny slit. "Loki?"

"How many times will I have to tell you that you may just walk in?" He replied with a small, yet amused sigh and you opened the door wide enough to step into his room (which looked more like a small library indeed, a palace of knowledge and dreams, escape routes into different worlds).

"Well, I… I was just wondering if you needed anything from the city. I'm going shopping for a costume." You said softly, watching Loki as he sat in the windowsill, reading peacefully as always. Behind him, outside of his small realm of endless possibilities, the rain hit the window with increasing speed to create a soft and steady drumming. A perfect echo of your heartbeat.

"Are you sure you want to go out there?" He asked in return, motioning to the approaching storm outside.

"Yeah. I really need a costume and I don't have any idea yet, nor anything that could even remotely be used as a costume. Don't really have a choice." You sighed, already freezing as you watched the trees outside bend concerningly in the strong blow of the wind.

"You could also stay here and drink tea with me. Read a little..." Loki mused, eyes returning to the book in his lap. If there had been time, you would have liked to spend hours just watching him read. It was beyond fascinating to watch his reaction whenever he read a piece of fiction, his face telling a story of its own, while hearing him read poetry in that liquid velvet voice was addicting like the strongest drug, enchanting to enjoy and leaving you craving for more.

"Can't we drink a tea tonight, once I'm back?" You asked as your heart felt painfully torn. "I really want to do both, but I need a good costume first."

"Don't mind me. I will be here, tonight, tomorrow… probably forever, if you need that long."

You chuckled at the irony in his voice. "Yeah, sure… Forever will be just long enough. Maybe I should simply dress up as you and annoy the hell out of everyone at that party. Cause some mayhem around the compound..."

"That, my dear, is the first decent costume idea I have heard all day." He smirked at the book as he still had his eyes fixed on the very same page, his whole expression screaming of an emotion you couldn't quite put a name to. "But I'm sure you will find something that's better suited for you."

"If I ever get going, I actually might." You chuckled. "Is there anything you need? I'm not overly fond of going to the city, because honestly the crowds give me anxiety to just think about, so keep that in mind when you ask me to bring you something ridiculous."

For a moment Loki only stared at his book, and you almost believed that he was ignoring you because of the tease, but a few seconds later he sighed and closed the book in his hand while rising to his feet, moving to put the book back into a shelf.

"C'mon Loki, just answer my question and I can finally go. I get that you don't like costume parties, but this is really important to me and I just wanted to be nice and ask if you need anything. So please, just say no and I can go." You sighed almost desperately now. "I'm sorry if I've overdone the teasing or anything, but…"

"I'm coming with you." He announced, changing his clothes into an entirely black suit and a warm coat with merely a soft green light.

"What...?" Your eyes widened, heart picking up speed again.

"I'm coming to the city with you. You asked me for help earlier and I said I wasn't of any help in crafting a costume. However I'm more than decent at fighting off crowds." Loki stated calmly, walking past you and holding the door open.

You looked at him in utter surprise for a moment, then started smiling widely. "That's really nice of you… to help me, I mean."

"Of course I'm helping you." He frowned at you as you walked into the hallway. "Why wouldn't I?"

"I… don't know." You simply replied, not in the mood to doubt his motives, only feeling very glad indeed that he would be coming with you. Going to the city alone wasn't THAT bad, but it still made you nervous at times. And it meant a whole lot to you that Loki would be coming with you now.

"Where do you think you're going?" Steve called once Loki and you crossed the entrance hall, heading towards the garages.

"Shopping!" You replied happily, giving the soldier a friendly smile. "Still need a costume."

"And what's HE doing?" Steve questioned, looking at Loki in deep suspicion, who only rolled his eyes in return and your face also fell.

"HE is my friend, Steve. And he's coming with me to help." You answered scoldingly, even though you knew it wouldn't be of any use. There was no amount of redemption that could change the way the Avengers saw Loki, and the thought left a painful sting in your heart and a longing to amend the wrong done to him.

"If you say so…" Steve mused, giving you a disapproving look before heading on towards the living room where the party preparations were already busying more people than you cared to count.

"I don't understand what you see in these people." Loki sighed as you made your way towards the row of cars, neatly lined up in the parking ground.

"I don't understand what they see in me! I'm no different than you, really…" You shrugged with a grin. "But since Tony likes me, we can at least pick a car now."

"Do you wish to drive or shall I?" Loki asked politely, yet not without a smirk of his own.

"Feel free to choose." You chuckled, pointing to the board of car keys on the wall and a few minutes later he drove off the parking ground with a rather dangerous speed that left you feeling calm nonetheless. You knew that you were completely safe with him, both physically and mentally and you smiled to yourself as you made your way through the heavy rain, towards the city.

_______________

You had roamed through multiple stores, looked at a thousand different costumes of witches, vampires, horror clowns and nurses and yet you hadn't even wanted to try a single one on. They all screamed Halloween, screamed 'hey there, look at me', screamed naked skin and boozy nights. Nothing spoke to you at all, and after three hours your energy equaled that of an unwatered plant in the scorching summer heat. Only difference being that it was still raining, and you felt increasingly sorry for having dragged Loki along with you. In his defense, he had not once complained about the time you took, or about your sarcastic commentary of both the strangers you passed and the costumes you saw. Rather on the contrary, he had seemed fairly amused by your relentless sarcasm and even gone along with it most of the time.

Yet, after having gone through so many stores, you had decided to take a break and buy him coffee as a thank you for making this whole experience a lot more bearable. Thus you found yourself sitting in a corner coffee shop, in a cozy little nook that shielded you from the crowds and yet allowed you to watch the pouring rain outside. Loki had picked the place, and you had felt yourself enjoying it immediately after setting foot in it. You always enjoyed the things Loki would pick, or show to you… it was as if he just knew you so perfectly well that everything he did went along with you like a seamless transition from his very being to yours. It could get quite scary at times.

"I'm really sorry that you haven't found the right costume yet…" His voice pulled you out of your thoughts and back into the real world, as you warmed your chilled hands on the hot porcelain of your mug.

"Oh, don't be. I'm the one who needs to be sorry for dragging you outside in this weather… and for making you help me." You sighed, studying his marvelous features in the dim glow of the distant fireplace.

"Why would you be sorry for asking me for help?" He questioned with a frown, taking a sip from his steaming mug. It was a miracle how he could drink the hottest liquids without hurting himself… maybe he used magic, or maybe he just didn't feel pain anymore.

"I'm sure you would've had something better to do back at the compound… I mean I'm just me, really, and I'm sure spending time with me isn't on top of your list of fun activities." You snorted to yourself, sadly, looking down at the small bursting foam bubbles of the steamed milk, slowly swirling on top of your coffee in a hypnotically slow spiral.

"That is a really odd thing to say, darling. Shopping isn't on top of my list of fun activities, that indeed is true… but spending time with you isn't as much an activity as it is a necessity to me." He replied with a smile, looking at you in a mixture of humor and curiosity.

“A necessity?” You wondered, deeply frowning at Loki in return. Sometimes it was just impossible to decrypt what he was saying and differentiate it from the meaning behind his words.

“It’s fairly easy, really, but let me illustrate it to you… You, my dearest Y/n, are inherently good. Not because you made it your mission, or because you are expected to be, and that is truly remarkable. You are a bright light in your entirety, to me, a beacon of hope and a promise of a future that I have never deemed possible before our first meeting. I, on the other hand, am not inherently the way I am by nature, but definitely by circumstance. I am a deeply blemished creature, darling. Flawed to the very core.”

“I most definitely beg to differ!” You replied immediately, letting go of his insufficient explanation on why he would deem you a necessity in order to right this wrong he was doing to himself. “I am not entirely good! And neither are you a bad person for that matter, even if you obviously seem to think that.”

"I don't think I'm a bad person. I know for a fact that I am not a good man."

"But the world isn't black and white, Loki!" You protested, eyes digging into his in attempt to make him understand. He was a good person indeed, perfect to you in his being, even if you couldn't tell him without giving yourself away.

"You are a creature of the light, Y/n, while I am a creature of the dark. You cannot deny that." He gave back with a serious expression, looking at you almost sadly.

"I don't care what you say, there's no light without darkness and no darkness without light. Nothing is inherently good or bad!" Your heart clenched painfully, trying to break free from your rib cage in vain.

“This promises to be a very interesting discussion, but I’m afraid we will have to continue it another time. Let’s say for now that you are on top of my list indeed.” He mused, finishing his coffee while you took the first reluctant sips of your own. That is when an idea struck you, like a lightning rippling through a tree and dooming it catch fire with a sudden intensity, destined to burn until nothing would be left.

“I have an idea for a costume.” You blurted out, making Loki’s eyes shift to yours yet again.

“Care to tell me?”

“Nope. Not yet. We’ll have to find some very specific items and I don’t want you to mock me the entire time.” You chuckled, looking at him with a little more adoration than you wanted to let on as he rolled his eyes but failed to hide his smirk from you. Loki would be your inevitable doom and you knew it, but at least you could make the road to hell a fun one indeed.

After also finishing your coffee a little while later, and after having ignored Loki’s intrigued gaze on you for the better part of said while, you both returned your mugs and left the coffee shop to be released out of the warmth into the cruelly whipping rain.

First of all, you browsed through a few of the stores you usually went to, in search of something that would even remotely come close to the picture you had in your head. Loki patiently trailed along, however using absolutely every opportunity to point out that he would be of more help if he knew just what you wanted to represent.

Soon enough you ran out of stores to search through, and your desperation really showed more with every passing minute. Why did this have to be so difficult?

“This is not making you happy, and I don’t like it.” Loki suddenly commented, taking a hold of your elbow to keep you from walking on without him.

“What?” You frowned, ignoring the scorching burst of energy that erupted in your heart upon his touch. Loki never touched you if it wasn’t utterly necessary, so this unique sensation, even through so many layers of clothes, was very much new and very much welcome indeed.

“I am pointing out that this whole hunt for a costume was supposed to be fun for you, but by now I get the impression that it is more of a burden than a fun activity indeed.” He shrugged, looking into your eyes in a way that inevitably made you shiver. “Maybe we should reconsider our options?”

“I really wanted this to be fun, but I just can’t seem to find what I’m looking for in any of those stupid stores.” You sighed.

“Well, since you’re refusing to let me in on what you want to represent, would you at least tell me what you want the costume to look like?” He asked in such a kind voice that your heart skipped a beat at the realization that he really was trying to help you, and that he was honestly concerned about your happiness. You wouldn’t let your mind delve into what that might mean right now.

"I'm looking for an elegant, white gown." You started, sighing as you stood in the middle of the sidewalk, only shielded from the crowds by Loki's larger frame in front of you. It was weird really, how everyone just stepped out of your way when you were with Loki… You hadn't been jostled by anyone at all today, and that seriously left you wondering if people just avoided Loki or if he was keeping them away from you intentionally, with magic or anything else you weren't supposed to know about.

"A white dress… of the sort the women here wear when they are to be wed?" He inquired, rising an eyebrow in honest curiosity. Obviously he really had no intention of mocking you for now, so you loosened up a little.

"Well, yeah, something of that sort…" You shrugged. "But I haven't seen any dress that looked like that yet."

"Why don't you just buy a wedding dress indeed?"

"C'mon Loki, I can't buy a wedding dress as a costume! Do you know how crazy expensive those things are? And it would be really awkward." You mumbled as your cheeks heated up, bringing a touch of crimson to your face despite the cold autumn air.

"Why don't you do that kind of thing Thor tried a few weeks ago when he really wanted that stupid flannel shirt?"

"Thrifting?" You rose an eyebrow at him, crossing your arms in front of your chest. "I'm not entirely sure if secondhand stores even sell those kinds of garments."

"You'll be, once we try it." He shrugged, giving you a small smile that made you return the tiniest of smiles. It truly was a loss for humanity that Loki only ever smiled around you, that you were just certain of. He could be so incredibly nice and lovely if only he wanted to… which he never did, with anyone but you.

"Alright…" You sighed. "Let's look, at least. I just REALLY want a good costume."

Thus you made your way to the next secondhand shop, looking through their collection of clothes but you didn't find anything that even came close. So you went on to the next, and the next, until in the fourth one you finally found a whole collection of wedding dresses.

"So those garments are what you were looking for?" Loki asked, arms crossed in front of his chest as he watched you watching the dresses with a frown.

"Uh, yeah… I guess." You answered in a small voice, searching through the many different dresses.

"Can I help you?" An overly friendly, elderly woman asked, smiling so brightly at you that you were sure her cheeks must hurt.

"Uhm… I was just looking at the dresses really…" You replied, looking at her first, then at Loki with an equally lost and desperate expression.

"Oh, I'm sure we can find something for such a lovely young couple!" She beamed at you, then at Loki a little more reluctantly. "When do you plan on getting married, lovelies?"

You immediately blushed a deep shade of red, suppressing the urge to just grab Loki and run, while Loki for his part only stared at the woman without saying a single word.

"Uh, that's… that's not…" You stuttered, unsure of how to appropriately tell her that you needed the dress for a costume and not to actually get married!

"Sooner rather than later, that is precisely why we are here now." Loki finally replied with the most stoic expression, and your cheeks heated up even more as you merely stared at your feet. God, he was good at lying… maybe he'd have to teach you how to do that one day.

"Oh, don't worry about a thing! We're gonna find a nice dress for you, dear." The woman still smiled brightly as she turned to you, then to the dresses. "Are you looking for something simple and easy or rather something bold?"

"Uhm… I'm not entirely sure. Something with a simple top and a larger skirt maybe?" You shrugged, fighting the blush off your cheeks for good as you looked at Loki who was just smirking to himself as he sauntered around in the small store. At least one person was having fun, currently.

The sales assistant ushered you into a changing cubicle and made you try on multiple dresses, which just looked horrendous on you. To your poor mind, buying a wedding dress, even if for the solemn sake of a costume, was a really odd thing to do and you kept feeling a little awkward as you looked at yourself in all those dresses. After half an hour of changing again and again, the elderly woman finally brought you a dress that alone by its look on the hanger caught your immediate interest. It was truly beautiful, not too simple and not too elaborate… almost ideal. Once you'd out it on, you found that it fit you almost perfectly even before looking at yourself in the huge mirror. That at least was a good sign, you really didn't feel like being uncomfortable all night. However it was all topped off when you finally dared to look at yourself in the mirror, eyes going wide at the sight. It truly was… nothing you would ever have expected to wear, but it would be just perfect for your costume.

"Loki?" You called a little more insecurely than you usually would, as you were almost entirely sure that he would've wandered off by now, bored and causing some mayhem in the city.

"Still here, darling." He replied and you could hear the smirk in his voice as if he'd really known what you had just been thinking.

"Would you… Do you want to take a look?" You asked reluctantly. "I really like the way this one looks."

"As you haven't even bothered to show me the previous ones, I'd very much welcome the insight. And the distraction." He mused and you rolled your eyes with a smile, taking one last look at yourself in the mirror before leaving the small changing cubicle.

"How do I look?" You asked with a half smile, biting your lip as you stood in front of him in utter awkwardness. Loki however only stared at you in an odd mixture of awe and fear, eyes quickly roaming over your small form before locking with yours in a long moment of silent observation.

"Will this work for your costume?" He finally asked instead of answering your question. You hadn't specifically expected a compliment, for Loki wasn't the kind of person to make compliments easily or without meaning them to the very core, but you had expected at least a commentary on the dress itself.

"Yeah, I think so." You replied quietly, but quickly shook the uneasy feeling off. "It'll be just fine."

"Great, I'm glad we have found something you like at last. Is there anything else you need?" He inquired, rising an eyebrow.

"Uh… yeah, one thing, but that will be quick." You mused, returning to your cubicle to change. After paying for the dress, you went on to another store to pick up some long sleeve lace gloves and then finally you returned to the car to drive home to the compound.

It was late in the afternoon already as you both made your way back towards your hallway and your rooms, yet Loki stopped you before you could disappear in your own space.

"Thank you for letting me come along. I enjoyed our venture." He said with his usual small smile and your heart did an involuntary leap.

"I did too. A whole lot." You smiled back. "But I better get ready now, for the party…"

"Will you tell me now what you're dressing up as?" He asked with a smirk.

"I'll come by your room before the party, then you'll see." You grinned back before closing your door behind yourself.

_______________

For the next two hours you took a shower, did your hair and makeup and finally put on your new garments, styling the dress up a little to make it look a little less like a wedding dress and more like yourself. Finally you were content with your efforts, happy even. This was a freaking great costume, and you most definitely would have a great time at that party. You only wished that you'd have some more appropriate jewelry, but that really was so minor that you didn't think about it for too long.

Sighing contently, you left your room and walked the few steps to Loki's. This time you actually listened to what he'd told you and just opened the door without knocking.

"Hey Loki…" You said as you stepped into the room, finding him sitting in the window once more with the inevitable book in his lap.

Once he looked at you, his face showed the same reaction as it had in the shop when you'd tried on the dress for the first time. Awe, maybe even adoration and a slightly hint of fear.

"I just wanted to show you the outcome of today's efforts." You gave him a small smile, turning around on your spot once before looking back into his eyes. "Thank you for your help."

Loki stayed quiet as he only stared at you, not moving nor even breathing. But when you turned to leave, you heard him rise to his feet behind your back.

"Who exactly is it you're portraying?" He asked quietly as he walked towards you, making you turn around once more.

"I'm the white queen." You gave him a half smile. "Alice in wonderland."

"Ah. Of course." He smiled, coming to stand only a foot away from you.

"Since you said I was inherently good, I thought I might as well act the part." You shrugged. "And I think I make a decent enough queen."

"Y/n…" He spoke quietly, eyes searching yours yet again. "I have been thinking… And I've come to the conclusion that I was wrong."

"YOU admit to being wrong?" You rose your eyebrows at him. "Wrong about what?"

Instead of answering, you watched how he very carefully placed a hand on your shoulder, gently caressing your collarbone with a slender finger. Upon the soft green light surrounding you, you felt something cool and heavy resting against the skin of your neck. When Loki pulled his hand back, your eyes stayed fixed on his nonetheless.

"I was wrong about you, and me. And you were right all along. There is a little dark in the light, a little light in the dark. It's what draws creatures of the light towards the darkness and creatures of the dark towards the light indeed." He said calmly, motioning for you to look down on yourself. The smile on your lips widened upon seeing the intricate, yet bold black necklace that was darkly contrasting against the crisp white of your dress. To say it looked stunning would have been an understatement.

"Your light draws me in, darling." He said in a breath. "And I find myself unable to resist any longer."

"Then don't." You replied in the same quiet voice, smiling softly. "You know… The white queen is the only true match for the black king. Or have you never played chess before?"

A slow grin spread on his lips as the fear disappeared from his eyes and only the deepest adoration remained. "Will you be my queen, Y/n? For tonight and every day to come?"

"It will be my pleasure, and my privilege." You smiled brightly. "Tonight you'll need a costume though."

With a mere wave of his hand, smirking, he turned his suit into a royal asgardian gown, entirely black except for a crisp white cravat.

"There's more light in you than you let on, you know." You mused happily as you let Loki take your hand in his, leading you out of the room and down the hallway.

"And there is just enough darkness in you to make you the perfect queen indeed. My queen."

______________________________

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