#Listen okay its about Deceit and Remus its PERFECT

[romansleftshoulderpad]

Me? Refusing to write anymore of a drabble simply because the word count is 666? Absolutely

[small-teacup]

Kidnapping? I Think You Mean Human Borrowing

Requested by: @languortears

Notes: I'm so sorry I took so long!!! D: It's a bit rushed

Ships: Intruloceit

POV: 3rd person

TW: Kidnapping, sympathetic Remus and Janus, panicked thoughts, mention of torture, skeletons and implied blood, impersonation

Let me know if I missed any, please! :D

Word Count: 1367

“That’s KIDNAPPING, Remus,” Janus explained for the 43rd time that day.

Remus opened his mouth and held up a finger, ready to say something in response before he paused and lowered his finger slightly. He seemed to have multiple ideas, instead keeping his mouth open and looking like he would finally get a few sentences out of his mouth before deflating. It was comical, to say the least. Janus sighed and shook his head, “Take your time...”

After what seemed like forever, one word managed to escape Remus’ mouth, “Borrowing.” “What?” “Kidnapping makes it sound like we’re doing some kind of crime!” “IT IS A CR-”

“What I think you meant was ‘human borrowing.’”

Janus groaned and put his face in his hands. “You know what? Fine. Human borrowing.”

================

Logan sat in his room, peacefully typing away on his laptop. Just a normal day. Nothing different, nothing new, just the same as it was the day before. He actually liked the lack of change, despite his ability to adapt to circumstances easily. Well, he’d usually be able to adapt to new circumstances. As he was working, someone came up behind him and clapped their hand over his mouth so he couldn’t scream. It didn’t seem to be needed since Logan wouldn’t have screamed anyways. Nothing could hurt a side in the Mindscape. He was about to see who it was until something hit him over the head, darkness quickly taking over his vision as he went limp.

He woke up tied to a chair in what seemed to be a basement. There was barely any light besides a flickering lightbulb hanging from the ceiling right above him. He looked around, unfazed at the shackled skeletons on the wall or the suspicious red stains on the floor. Someone suddenly covered his eyes from behind, shrill laughter filling the air.

“Guess whoooo!~” They sang, disturbingly close to Logan in a failed attempt to make him scared.

“Judging from your behavior, I’m guessing Remus?”

“Nice guess, Logan. But no, it’s Janus.” “What?? How?” Janus uncovered Logan’s eyes and stepped in front of him, a little mischievous smile playing on his face.

“I imitated Remus’ voice and attitude to trick you.”

Logan frowned and tilted his head in confusion. “But what was the point of that?”

The deceitful side shrugged and said nonchalantly, “I don’t know. There really wasn’t any. However, I find it a bit amusing considering the fact that Remus is sitting right next to you.”

“What?”

Sure enough, when Logan turned his head, Remus was sitting like a puppy on the floor next to him. He gave the logical side a seemingly menacing grin, revealing his razor-sharp teeth. Logan simply blinked at him before looking back at Janus, much to Remus’ disappointment.

“Is there a point to any of this?” He asked, half-heartedly tugging the ropes that bound him to the chair. It wasn’t that he was making an attempt to escape, it’s just that it was starting to feel uncomfortable.

Janus had summoned himself his own chair, a velvet one with hints of gold. He crossed his legs and examined his nails boredly, which confused Logan even more since he was wearing gloves. “Ask Remus, it wasn’t my plan this time.”

Logan glanced to the gremlin next to him, sighing. “Before I say anything to him, do you mind if I ask you one more question?” “Go ahead, darling.”

“You don’t seem to be lying to me at all. I’ve seen that you only lie around everyone else except Remus, which leads me to infer that you don’t lie to people you like. Do you like me in some way?” Janus froze up, a light blush finding its way onto his face. “No I don’t! Why would I like you? That’s impossible, you’ve got it all wrong. Stupid…”

He crossed his arms and looked away, huffing. It was supposed to be him and Remus getting Logan all flustered, not the other way around!

Logan turned to Remus, “So why was I kidnapped?” “Not kidnapped, you were borrowed!” Remus corrected. “...That doesn’t make sense.” “It makes perfect sense to me!”

“Answer my question, please?” “Oh! Yeah yeah yeah- so, when the others come to save you, we’ll have this epic bloody fight! Or maybe not...I dunno. And then you get saved, BUT we get to torture you until they get here! And it’ll be so fuuuuuuuuuuunnn!!!”

Logan blinked, then sighed, “I doubt there’s anything you can do to ‘torture’ me. Besides, the others aren’t coming anyway.”

The duke’s face dropped as he suddenly stood up and leaned close to Logan, his hands gripping and clawing into the chair arm. “HUH???!”

Janus had been listening to the conversation, even if it seemed like he wasn’t. The unexpected taste of truth surprised him, causing him to turn curiously to the pair in front of him.

“The others aren’t coming,” Logan repeated, assuming that Remus just didn’t hear him.

“What do you mean??! They have to! They’re your friends, aren’t they?? Plus, that sounds REALLY depressing. How’re you so okay with it??” “I’ve simply accepted it. It just seemed to be the logical thing to do. I can’t change it anyway.”

Janus said, almost a bit too calmly, “And do you think that’s a normal thing? That your friends won’t come and save you?” The logical side shrugged, “I guess not. You can’t really blame them.”

“Elaborate.” “...No,” he muttered, his eyes glazing over as he stared at the floor. Remus deflated and sat on the floor, resting his elbow on the chair arm. The next few moments were a blur for Logan. ‘They weren’t coming. I could be anywhere, dangerous or not, and they wouldn’t care. I could be dead and they wouldn’t notice. The Dark Sides might not be able to kill me, but torture is not out of the question. Mental torture, I mean. I could try and pretend that it doesn’t affect me, but I’ll eventually break and when I show my weaknesses, they’ll laugh. They’ll laugh and treat me like a joke and at that point, I might as well duck out because everyone knows that Logic is essential but Logan isn’t and they’ll be so glad to have someone else in my place that they won’t miss me at all…’

The voices around him were becoming muffled as he sank deeper into his thoughts. How much time had passed? It felt like hours already… There was a ringing in his ears that he couldn’t get rid of, considering his hands were tied behind him. In fact, he was starting to lose feeling in his arms. Was he panicking? Spiraling? But what caused it? Why was he feeling this way? Why now? What’s happening-?

“LOGAN!”

The sudden shout pulled him out of his thoughts, looking up at the two sides that stood by him, concern and worry clear on their faces. Only then did he notice his shallow breathing and the tears slowly streaming down his face. Before he knew it, a pair of arms wrapped around him in a warm hug. Without thinking, he latched onto the person, recognizing the smell of trash and about a thousand years of no showering. Wait- what? He was surprised at the sudden freedom. When did they cut the ropes? Nevermind that…

A gloved hand cupped his face gently, the scent of crisp apples and linen going along with it. He leaned into the touch. It felt..comforting. It felt like home. Maybe this was where his home really was..?

“Remus? Janus?” The two sides looked at him, a silent cue for him to go on.

“..Can I stay with you guys? If that’s alright.”

Remus let go and stared at him wide-eyed. He looked over at Janus and back at Logan. It seemed like Janus was doing the same.

“Of course you can-!” The deceptive side blurted out before clearing his throat and pulling his hand away, inspecting his nails that he couldn’t see. “I mean- I suppose you could.”

Logan laughed, to both the dark sides’ delight. It sounded magical like bells ringing.

Never in Logan’s life had he been so glad to have been kidnapped.

(This fanfic wasn't proofread and neither was this post-)

[shortprince-cos]

Patton's Normal And Totally Not Angsty Birthday

Summary: Patton was fully expecting to spend his birthday with his stuffed animals and pictures instead of actual people, but his famILY had other secret plans.

Warnings: Crying, being alone for an extended period of time, angst, slight innuendo. Tell me if I need to add anything else!

Pairings: Platonic DRLAMP (all)

{Masterlist}

~~~~~

Patton was fully expecting to spend his birthday with his stuffed animals and pictures instead of actual people.

It wasn't a far-fetched idea, considering what had happened earlier last year. Everyone was still on their toes from the...fight.

It wasn't a fight though! It was more like a...big disagreement. That kind of maybe split everyone apart and left Patton alone...

But it was fine! Everyone just needed some alone time! Even if it had been awhile - a long while - since the incident. They just needed to think about things, and when they were ready, Patton would apologize and they would hopefully accept!

Hopefully...

Patton turned in his bed again, trying to sleep for the umpteenth time that night.

He sighed and eventually sat up, glancing at the clock. It said it was 4:16 in the morning, now it was technically January fifteenth.

Happy birthday to him.

Patton wiped the tears off his face and put on his glasses and his cat hoodie. Well, if it was his birthday, he might as well have a cupcake and make a wish. He'd probably need it, to be fully honest.

Patton meandered through the hallway, glancing at everyone's different colored doors. Everyone was probably asleep.

He remembers when it used to be just three doors in the hallway. Just Morality, Creativity, and Logic. Was it simpler then? Or were they just living in ignorance?

"No one knows you better than yourself, am I right, Tony?"

"I know big words too! Ssssssaxophone-"

"Who knows what'll happen if you don't adopt them, and they need a good home!"

"Anything he darn well pleases!"

...Maybe he was the only one not taking things seriously. They say ignorance is...better to live in, and Patton was basically swimming in it before his wake up call.

"We need actual contributions from you, now and then."

Is that why this happened? Maybe he's been ignorant of all the actual dilemmas this entire time. That's how everything went wrong! He didn't just suddenly not know what to do, he never knew what to do! He just hid it with jokes and puns and silly commentary to 'lighten the mood', but really he was just a distraction from their actual problems.

Patton hugged himself as he stood in the hallway, surrounded by the doors of his friends. Well, if they still wanted to be his friend.

Patton glanced at the dark purple door in the hall, cringing at the memories that came with it.

"Now Anxiety, if you don't want to participate, you can just sit this one out."

"Awww you poor little anxious baby!"

"And what about Anxiety, he always seems to get you down."

Patton swiped his tears away, hurriedly making his way down the hall to the staircase.

Janus didn't have a door here yet; he said he'd rather stay with the others in the hidden side of the mindscape.

Probably because of how awful they all were to him.

"Deceit, standing in the spot of one of my four best friends."

"Um, you're in my spot."

"Because Thomas gave his word, but you wouldn't know anything about words, would'ja mister?"

"I may be amphibian, but I can't say that I am fibbin'!"

God, they were so terrible to him. No wonder he doesn't like being around any of them.

Patton's hands shook as he gripped the banister at the top of the stairs, holding in his silent sobs.

All of this is his fault. He caused the rift in his famILY.

Suddenly he heard voices from downstairs. Wasn't everyone in bed? It was four in the morning, who would be up right now?

Patton wiped the tears off his face for the umpteenth time and took deep breaths, trying to steady himself.

He stalked down the top stairs slowly, trying to listen in onto what the voice was saying.

"Listen," A voice whispered. "I'm just pointing out all the possibilities."

"More like all the negabilities, seeing how all of them are negative." Another snarked.

"Just- does he even wanna see us? We basically ghosted him for months. We didn't even include him on the Nico situation. Why didn't we do that, he's the heart! He's like, the most important side for that!"

Oh. They were talking about him.

Patton debated leaving, going down there, or keep on listening before another voice spoke up.

"I doubt he would not wish to see us. If anything, I believe he would like to talk about what happened."

"Logan, we're talking about Patton here. If we talk, he'll just say he's fine when he's clearly not fine."

"That's not true." One obviously lied.

So all four of them were downstairs talking about him. Wait, isn't there supposed to be five-

"Hi Potty-cakes!" Remus suddenly shouted from behind him.

Patton shrieked in surprise, before almost tumbling down the stairs before someone caught him.

"Pat! Are you okay?!" Virgil said, slowly helping Patton to his feet.

"Y-Yeah, I'm perfect!" He said, plastering his Patton-ted fake smile.

Virgil squinted at him. "Pat, have you been crying?"

Ah. Guess the smile didn't work.

Patton noticed that everyone was crowded around him, including Janus, which meant that lying was out of the question.

"Uh- kinda?" Another smile.

Someone swore under their breath as Logan spoke up. "Patton, what are you doing awake at this hour? Don't you normally get up at seven?"

Patton stood up straightly instead of leaning on Virgil. "Oh, I just woke up and couldn't fall back asleep! What're you guys...?" Patton started as he finally looked around the room, noticing the balloons, streamers, and a banner that they had used for every birthday Patton had had.

"...doing?" He finished.

"Uh-" Roman started. "Well uh- we were kind of...surprising you with a birthday party?" He shrugged nervously.

Patton stood shocked for a moment. They were throwing him a surprise birthday party? Why? Why would they do that- weren't they mad at him? There's no way they would just suddenly not be mad at him! What was happening?!

"Pat, what's wrong?" Janus suddenly asked, putting a gloved hand on Patton's shoulder.

"I'm fine, why?" He answered on instinct.

"Padre, you're crying." Roman explained.

Patton touched his cheek, and sure enough, he was crying. "O-Oh. I guess I am."

Another hand gripped his wrist. "Pop-star, are you okay?" Virgil asked with concern and sincerity in his voice.

Patton immediately started sobbing. "No, no I'm not."

Some tentacles wrapped around him from behind - probably Remus - as a bunch of arms started surrounding him as well, securely trapping him in a hug.

Patton kept crying into someone's shoulder as multiple people kept whispering sweet nothings in his ear.

Eventually, Patton had stopped crying, just enjoying the feeling of a hug - a hug! - surrounding him.

Then, they started pulling away, leaving Patton with traces of warmth left over.

"Patton, are you alright?" Logan asked with concern in his eyes.

Patton rubbed at his eyes again and sniffled. "Y-Yeah. I'm just overwhelmed, I guess. I kinda expected to spend today alone..."

Everyone made a noise of either surprise or concern.

"Patton I..." Roman started, looking at the ground in guilt. "I didn't mean to make you feel alone, I just-" He sighed. "I talked to De-Janus, and he helped me realize that it wasn't like you were trying to make me the bad guy, you were just trying to tell me that Janus wasn't one either. So, I planned a party to apologize to you, and well, I guess the surprise is ruined."

Patton immediately hugged Roman the minute he stopped talking. Roman chuckled, but Patton could hear the tears in his voice.

"I'm- I'm so sorry I-"

"Shh, don't be." Roman comforted. "We all forgive you."

After another minute of hugging, Logan cleared his throat.

"While this moment is very touching and much needed, it is currently almost five in the morning, so I suggest we all take a nap before we get into the festivities."

Everyone made noises of agreement, when Patton interrupted.

"Um- could we-?" Patton started before cutting himself off.

"What's up, Pat?" Virgil asked.

"Uh- I-I just thought that maybe we could..."

"Cuddle on the couch?" Janus finished with a smirk on his face.

Patton nodded with blush on his face.

"Ooo sexy~"

"Remus, I swear to all things princely-" Roman started before the twins started arguing and Logan had to break them up before they could brawl in the living room.

Eventually, everyone on the was cuddled up on the couch and snuggling in one way or another, and Patton couldn't be more content.

~~~~~

Whoo! I finished on time!!!!!!!! I'm so proud of myself for writing this in one day! Though, I think it's a bit rushed, I forgive myself for that tho because it was written in one day lol

Ty for reading! I really enjoyed writing Patton angst again lol!

General Taglist: @resident-crow-goth @macademmia @theantisocialghost @foreverfangirlalways @emo--nightmaree @moxy--sanders101 @quinnthequeer @gattonero17 @trashno0dle @tranquil-space-ninja @artsy-enby09 @lugooble @sander-crossing @disney-princess-patton @sleepyysoot @hi-its-tutty @lookingforaplacetosleep @sarcasmremovedsoul @corkeecoderyt @drarrymalecsolangelo @private-snippers @girl-who-reads @emy-loves-you

Ask to be added or removed!

Reblogs are appreciated!💖

[mc-i-r]

He tries

Pov: Janus

Tw: major character death, angst, hint of unsymp!sides (except Remus), arguing, illusions(?), knife/stabbing mention (hypothetically), panic attack (implied), swords, all caps (screaming), language, crying, unintentioned body morphing, self deprecating thoughts, overworking, unintentional triggering of panic attack, a  t o u c h of derealization(?)

Let me know if I missed anything!

Word count: 2460

A/N: hi @imma-potatoo um I know you probably don’t know me but do you remember this post? yeah I um I wrote it so yeah here it is :)

Edit: tumbled being a bitch baby and I can't get the fuckin link to work I'm so sorry D:

Janus is a complicated creature. He always has been and, presumably, always will be. But that's what humans are, aren’t they? Complicated, fickle little things. They suffer with emotions and thoughts and actions and make their way about the world like little ants trying to please their queen. But Janus has no queen, only five sides and a human to please. He’s not even a human, only a fraction of one that’s forced to live and breathe among the ants. However, no matter what he does, no matter how much he sacrifices and works and improves himself, he just can’t please them. Like I said, he’s complicated.

It’s not as if he’s the perfect person either. I mean, all humans make mistakes right? So why should he be any different? I suppose it’s because of his function, being Deceit rarely has its perks. Sure, impersonating other sides to be listened to or get his point across most likely wasn’t the most effective way to help Thomas but...who can blame him? I mean, it’s not as if he could just pop up and immediately be listened to. Hell, Logan shows up in almost every video and even he’s not listened to! But Janus still tries. And tries. And tries. And tries. And tries.

Nothing works.

Right now, he’s trying to tell them that Thomas needs to take a break. He’s been working nonstop for the past three weeks planning videos, photoshoots, costume arrangements, events, and auditions. Needless to say, they're all a bit stressed. Janus most of all.

Changing from Deceit to Self Preservation was a major change in Janus’s life. I mean, spending years being hated and feared and hidden away from others did its damage, it's part of the reason why Janus inherited the snake traits but, finally being acknowledged that he’s real and a part of Thomas just like everyone else is was....overwhelming. Granted, nothing’s really changed. He still gets ignored, pushed around, and left out but...when those two words left Thomas’s mouth… that was all he needed. All he wanted. To just be seen. To be noticed by someone other than Remus.

It only lasted for a week.

Still, he does his job. He makes sure Thomas washes his face in the morning and drinks his coffee. He makes sure he goes to sleep, takes a shower, washes his clothes and does everything else a man in his thirties does. But throwing more and more projects in the mix means Janus gets pushed to the side, left to scream from a distance that Thomas needs to take care of himself. He’s been working overtime just to make sure Thomas goes to bed, not even worried about what time as long as his head hits the pillow before the sun comes up. Sometimes, he’s been unsuccessful. But he still tries. Even now, stressed and overworked out of his mind, he tries.

He was relaxed...well, somewhat, giving his points sparingly to not push the boundaries of his newfound acceptance too soon. He added a pro here and a fact there, trying to lead them all in the right direction. So far only Patton agrees and, given recent events, that basically means everyone else is against it. Still, Janus tries.

He’s settled in between the banister and Logan, putting him unfortunately close to Virgil who is definitely not sparring on giving him his fair amount of glares. Still, Janus endures, knowing that a break will only do Thomas good. I mean, have you seen Hamilton?

But the bickering soon turns into arguing between Roman and Patton, Janus not even daring to interject. It was surprisingly intense, the newfound hatred on Romans end and the persistent pushing from Patton coming together to explode in a bout of yelling. Janus shrank back from the noise, pushing himself further into the shadows in an attempt to hide himself. It, unfortunately, didn’t work.

“Jan, tell him that he needs to take a break!” Patton pleaded, looking at Janus with eyes that held all too much emotion behind them. He wanted to help, he really did, but…

“Oh yeah, please Janus, tell us why Thomas needs a break now that he’s finally getting work done,” Roman sassed back. Janus knew Roman just wanted to prove a point. He knew that. But the intense gaze the creative side gave him made him shudder. Roman was mad at Patton, not Janus. Still, the look of pure hatred bore into Janus, pricking his skin and making his stomach drop.

He couldn’t speak. No witty quip or sarcastic remark, not even a hiss. He just froze. He felt everyone’s eyes turn to him, waiting for a response to the very simple question. Hell, Janus had been supporting it for the past hour they had been talking about it! But now, all eyes on him and tongues ready to object, he couldn’t speak.

It felt as if the room was spinning, warping and contorting around him until he couldn't tell left from right. He knew it wasn't really happening, the real world didn’t work like that, but his brain was convinced that it was. He felt his eyes go wide and he stumbled, catching himself on the banister. He tried to hide it by adjusting his hat only to be met with a concerned voice.

“Janus? Kiddo, are you okay?” Patton, sweet sweet Patton asked, dropping the fierce gaze and tone and replacing it with a gentle question. Janus swallowed and cleared his throat.

“I’m fine, Patton, thank you for your...concern” Janus trailed off, taking a breath in between his words. His eyes started to waver in and out of focus. He gasped and stumbled again, leaning in the banister to keep his weakening body up. He heard Patton shout something, presumably his name, and rush over to him.

Too close too close too close-

Janus hissed at him, shrinking away from Patton and further against the railing. Patton paused, a flash of hurt washing over his face before he took a few steps back, holding his hands up in defense. Janus hated that look, the type of look that made you want to wrap Patton in a blanket to protect him from the world. He wanted to apologize but his throat wouldn’t work, staying stubbornly quiet as the room spun.

A sharp pain bore its way through his skull, feeling as if a hot knife was being stabbed in his snake eye over and over and over again. He yelled out and grabbed his face, kneeling over as it sent a wave of pain through his body. He could feel the others rush forwards, all ready to help the now screaming side.

Get away get away ge-

“Get away!” Janus hissed out.

He felt his body glitch, his insides morphing into something inhuman. He heard a gasp and he opened his eyes to see Patton covering his mouth, Logan furrowing his brow, Virgil staring at him with wide eyes and, of course, Roman with his sword drawn. Janus reached up to his face to feel glasses. He looked down to see a cardigan wrapped around his shoulders and draped over a light blue shirt. He glanced at Patton, confirming the suspicion that he had transformed into the moral trait.

“Kiddo...what's happening?” Patton asked quietly, patiently waiting for an answer.

Janus didn’t have one.

“I don’t kn-aaAAHH!” Janus tried to speak but was interrupted by another glitch, his voice cracking and diving deeper. He kneeled over again, wrapping an arm around his stomach. He could see a blue tie hanging from his neck and, upon sitting up, he realized he had now morphed into Logan.

“Janus are...are you okay?” Logan asked, speaking quietly and for the first time all day. Janus opened his mouth to speak when he glitched again, changing into Roman quicker than he did Patton or Logan. His mind didn’t have time to register the change before he glitched again, becoming draped in a plaid-patched jacket. He heard Virgil hiss.

“Okay, what the fuck is going on?” Virgil hissed out, more panicked than angry. Janus began to sass back when he glitched again, changing back to his former self.

He took a breath and shook his head, leaning against the banister to support himself. He wrapped an arm around his stomach and felt his skin prickle, his scales shining as well as his discolored eye. He slowly looked up, locking eyes with Thomas.

“H-...help-” Janus whispered before he was cut off by a scream, his body morphing back to that of Patton.

He couldn’t control himself now, his body moving on it’s own accord while his mind begged for it to stop. He just wanted it to stop. His mouth opened and before he knew it, he was speaking.

“I don't know if I can believe whatever YOU tell me.”

The words left his mouth before he even realized what they were, his hand involuntarily slapping itself over his mouth to stop him from saying more. Patton looked at him with wide eyes, covering his mouth with his hands in shock. Janus could see...he could see the pain in his eyes. The hurt. The regret. Tears were already forming on the moral traits’ face, one or two of them rolling down his flushed cheeks.

“J-Janus? What…?” Patton whispered out, voice barely audible even though the room was silent.

“Pat, ple-” he wanted to apologize. He needed to apologize. But the words couldn’t come out. He glitched yet again, changing into the logical side once more.

“You’re nothing more than a glitch, a mistake in the mind.”

Logan froze solid, face blank in shock. Janus couldn’t blame him, having his own hurtful words thrown back at him would do that to you. Logan absentmindedly fiddled with his tie, staring blankly at Janus. Janus tried to reach out, to take a step and tell him that it was okay, that this was all just a big mistake and that he was sorry, but the fear in Logan’s eyes when he took a step forward was enough to know he should keep his distance. Perhaps, forever.

The bones in his back shifted, forcing his body to morph into the creative side. He leaned exhausted on the railing, looking up at Roman in reluctant hatred.

“We can’t trust him! Did you forget that he’s EVIL?!”

Romans surprised gaze turned into a scowl, his eyes narrowing at the unwilling imposter in the room. Who could blame him? Janus has barely even been acknowledged as a facet of Thomas’s personality, much less accepted and liked. If he starts changing and mocking other sides in front of them all is it really such a stretch that Roman would be on guard?

But Janus can’t stand it. Not anymore. He and Roman had come to somewhat of an agreement, both apologizing soon after the last video and working on building their relationship from the ground up. Things had been good as of late but this...this could ruin that completely.

So Janus cried.

He didn’t mean to, it just kind of...happened. The stress from the past few weeks mixed with whatever was going on currently and the loss of trust between him and Roman was enough to send him over the edge.

He choked out a sob, covering his mouth with his hand as he looked pleadingly to Roman. Praying, wishing for it to stop. He just wanted it to stop. Romans intense gaze softened, his sword lowering as the creative side was at a loss for words. Well...almost.

“Jan? Jan, what’s wrong?” Roman asked tentatively, scared of saying the wrong thing or making the wrong move. Jan appreciated him for that, always willing to look out for others no matter what. That's what made him an inspiration.

He reached out with his hand towards Roman, hoping that something would happen to make it go away. All he got in return was another glitch and a purple patchwork hoodie over his shoulders.

“N-no-” he tried to make it stop, to morph back to his old self and hide away forever. But his body didn’t hold him any sympathy, his mouth dripping out evil words.

“Even if he can tell the truth, that doesn’t mean he can be trusted.”

Virgil's eyes lit up in shock, his eyeshadow darkening as he backed up from the deceitful trait. He started shaking his head, stuffing his hands in his pockets as he slid down the wall. He tried to speak, his words cut off by a wave of panic.

“I-...I’m so-sorry, Jan. I-...I-” the boy in black buried his face in his hands, Roman soon rushing over to comfort him.

“I...It’s o-” Janus was cut off by a grunt as a wave of pain passed through him. “-kay. It’s okay.”

“Kiddo, are you sure?” Patton asked...scared? He was careful, speaking softly much like he did when calming Virgil down from an atta-….oh.

Oh.

Janus slowly looked up at him as his body morphed around him, changing back to his own skin. He didn’t feel real anymore, his face feeling too foreign to be familiar. He had no mask up anymore, all his emotions out there in the open for all to see. His eyes were cloudy, covered in a film of exhaustion and weakness. His skin was pale and flushed, his body shaking. He was absolutely pathetic.

He weakly looked over to Thomas, his body relying solely on the support of the wooden stairs behind him. He locked eyes with him, his stomach souring at the pity in his eyes. He opened his mouth, voice coming out in hoarse rasps.

“Oh, I hate this guy and his creepy...snake face!”

“Get out of here, Jack the Fibber!”

“Gah, Deceit! Leave me alone you slippery snake!”

“Well, your face ruined my day so we’ll call it even.”

“Why is he still here?”

“E V I L!”

One by one he repeated the words, his tears falling faster and his body growing weaker. He collapsed on his knees after the final word, clutching his chest as his breath grew sparse. He heaved in a final breath, looking around the room at each of the sides individually. He gasped out his final words, ones that would stick with the rest of them forever.

“I’m sorry.”

With that, he disappeared, his body falling limp to the floor. There were screams. Cries. Pleas for him to come back, for him to have a chance at being accepted. But it never worked. Day after day, year after year, nothing ever worked. Thomas would realize soon after that he had lost the ability to lie…

...and Janus with it.

Taglist: 

@whattheremus

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[sidespart]

Made-up fic title: Forget-me-not Blue (Have a lovely day!)

Cannonverse Time-Loop,  platonic DLAMP and Demus, Janus centric 

So after Putting Others First ends, Patton suggest Janus come to breakfast with the light sides the next day. It will give them a chance to explain everything that’s happened to Logan and Virgil, and he and Roman can *dad hint* both apologise and make up after they’ve both had some sleep/ time to cool off. 

Jan isn’t so sure it’s going to be that easy to make nice with the others but he’s willing to give it a shot. So he makes a suitably dramatic entrance the next day, appearing in the kitchen whilst the others are setting out breakfast.

It does not go well.

Patton shrieks when he appears, completely surprised. Roman pulls his sword out, Logan scowls and Virgil demands “what the hell do you think you’re doing here Deceit?” Janus looks at Patton expecting him to explain (and kind’ve annoyed he didn’t tell the others he was coming tbh) and Patton looks...scared. And just as confused as everyone else. After standing there in awkward silence for a moment Vigil snaps out something like ‘don’t you think things are already stressful enough with the stupid wedding today without you showing up?”

Which - the stupid wedding today? Janus checks the calendar on the fridge. And then goes back to his room to check his own calendar. It’s April 13th. Again. 

So the first repeat Jan manages to convince himself that he dreamt the first April 13th. He always tries to plan out his various schemes/interactions with people so meticulously- maybe he’s just doing it in his sleep now (it would explain the whole giant frog thing). But he goes through the whole day and it’s identical to his ‘dream’ (including the giant frog thing). And at the end of it he wakes up and its April 13th again.

By loop 3 he decides this is Romans fault. He’s the only one who left the discussion in the original timeline unhappy, and as creativity he’s a pretty powerful side - he cant affect the real world but he could potentially create a fantasy ‘time loop’ scenario in the imagination and stick Janus in it. He spends multiple loops trying to keep Roman happy, stalking him to see if he does...something... after the discussion to cause the loop (he never does), learning as much as he possibly can about him (and in the process starts to feel seriously guilty about how his actions in his previous two episodes have affected Roman) and eventually they get to a loop where Roman ends up agreeing and even defending Janus at the end of the discussion. Both of them, Patton and Thomas leave happy and Jan goes to sleep thinking he’s finally fixed it. And then he wakes up and it’s April 13th.

He decides maybe it’s not Roman. He goes through a very similar process with Patton, then Logan, he pulls Virgil into the discussion (which blows up SPECTACULARLY the first 6 or so run throughs) and does the same thing with him, learning more and more about them each time.  The (60th? 200th? he has lost track completely) loop, everything is perfect. Virgil joins in the post wedding discussion. Logan get’s to say his piece, in person, with everyone listening to him. Roman understands that he was pushed into making a decision he wasn’t happy with and that no one blames him. Patton is able to understand that it’s okay to not know everything, and that its unfair for Thomas and the  others to expect him to, without turning into a giant frog. Janus reveals him name and no one laughs. They all leave as friends.

He wakes up and it’s April 13th.

He goes to their breakfast again. Flips the table over and bursts into tears. He’s tired. 

He’s able to convince them he’s in a time loop by telling them things they’ve told him in previous loops. This is the first time he’s asked for help and is a bit shocked when they agree. After suggesting multiple ideas that he has already tried Logan suggests Thomas could be the problem - not during the discussion that Janus has been focusing on but somthing that happened during the rest of his day.

So, montage of Jannus trying to fix everying that Thomas does that day. With ideas ranging from ‘get off your fucking phone and talk to someone at this wedding you sad sack of sh*t” to “ring the callback people at 6 am and tell them you changed your mind. DO IT DO IT DO IT”. Nothing works. 

One loop (83? 356? he has no idea) whilst Janus is lieing face down in a bowl of cereal and the others are brainstomring ideas he has already tried, Virgil laughs and says it’s a shame Jan got caught up in a time loop and not him. Janus frowns at him 

“what?”

“well.... you can literally say or do whatever you want and there’s no consequences. Even if you say something stupid everyone will have forgotten by the next day. It’s...kinvde my dream honestly”

“...huh.”

SO, comedy montage of Janus living all of his best lives. He flings a ‘The Office’ DVD box set at Thomas’ head whilst screaming SELF CARE BITCH. He traps everyone in the theatre and performs a choreographed rendition of razzle dazzle to slightly confused applause. He spends entire days naked. He invents a new cocktail. He unleashes the orange side and watches the chaos whilst lazing on the sofa in a face mask. He snogs all the other sides at LEAST once each. He heads to Remus room and enlists him transform the whole mindscape into a beach. After spending the day building sand castles (or sand brothels in Remus’ case) and watching the other sides battle a kraken Remus grins at him and says 

“That was fun! What do you wanna do tomorrow?”

And Jan kind’ve sighs and shrugs because he really should be getting back to trying to fix this whole mess..and Remus scowls and says “oh right. You’ll want to be getting back to your real best friends”

Jan frowns. “You’re my best friend idiot”

Remus rolls his eyes. “Yeah. That’s why it’s taken one hundred and eighteen Aprils 13ths for you to even come and see me”.

Janus stares at him. He hadn’t told Remus about the time loop when he came to him with the beach plan.

His original idea about creativity being the only side who might be able to cause this? 

Looks like he wasn’t wrong after all.

Remus, desperate not to loose his only friend after Jan started making nice with the light sides, has either consciously or subconsciously trapped them both in this time loop on the last day where they were both ‘dark sides’.

And with Remus quickly running away after their conversation, Janus still doesn't know how to fix it. 

For the fake fic titles asks (please do NOT send me anymore to do for now)

[a-small-batch-of-dragons]

(Un)Wanted Part 3

Read on Ao3 

(Un)Wanted Masterlist

A child that sees demons in every dark corner is not a child that is wanted.

A child that cries and freezes and mumbles of terrible things is not a child that is wanted.

A child that jumps and startles and hisses is not a child that is wanted.

Unwanted things are purged from the Earth.

So Virgil runs.

In other words: Virgil is an outcast, ostracized and shunned for how he was born, forced to flee an angry mob only to stumble right into a fae garden.

Pairings: LAMP, DLAMP, DLAMPR, can be platonic or romantic you decide

Warnings: Implied/Referenced torture, child abuse, and self-harm, nothing super explicit. Sympathetic Deceit and Remus. Panic attacks, anxiety attacks.

Word Count: 7,040

Words are fucking stupid if you ask Remus.

Mortals have no idea what they’re doing with them and half the time they just make shit up and expect everyone else to go along with it. They don’t know what words are supposed to mean and half the time they try and pin down something that can’t be made into a single word into one and it’s just a big mess. There is one exception.

 Feral.

 Remus isn’t quite sure what gave mortals this one stroke of genius but he’s grateful for it. Feral. Even the word sounds like chaos. Which is just Remus’s cup of snail intestines.

 Feral, or more accurately, going feral, is the closest thing a fae gets to absolute bat-shit. Which, in fairness, by mortal standards, isn’t that bat-shit. Oh, yeah, sure mortals don’t have nearly the firepower of the fae, but let’s be real, here folks, mortals perfected the clockwork of murder far better than any fae could hope to.

 Going feral means what little hold a fae has on this fucking stupid temporal plane is tenuous at best. It means that bits of their aura manifest in ways that quickly go beyond the pitiful visible spectrum that mortals can tolerate. It means shapes and colors and energies that aren’t meant to be seen by mortal eyes, all barely held together by a flexible container of mostly water. A body, if you prefer the un-fun definition.

 Going feral is the fine line between creation and destruction.

 Remus is the one who goes feral the most often, even though it’s not why you think. It’s not directly tied to emotion, not really. If it was, Patton would be going feral every two seconds. It’s not even tied to sheer raw power. As much as Remus hates to admit it, that’s probably Snakey, even if it is only through his role as Gatekeeper.

 No no no. It’s much worse than that.

 Sir Nerd-A-Lot was right when he said that each of their ‘rooms’ is a slightly different layer of reality, something mortals can’t understand because of the way they’re made in this world. Although Remus’s way of understanding it wasn’t some tender touching of hands or soft words of explanation.

 The rooms are different ways to see.

 L’s room is like a normal pair of glasses. Makes things sharper, easier to understand, clearer. Less ambiguity.

 J’s room is like looking through mist or fog. More gray areas, easier to twist the truth to what you want to see, easier to let your mind play tricks on you. Less easy to figure out exactly what’s going on.

 Patton’s room is like always being in that weird soft stage mortals always say they have when they’re really sleepy. Not tired, because of course not, words are stupid. Sleepy is soft yawns and smiles and too-long sleeves and adorable smiles that make Remus want to pinch their cheeks until they fall off. Tired is squinty eyes and muttered complaints and downing that mysterious brown liquid. Patton’s room is being sleepy, everything a little softer, sweet enough to make Remus’s teeth ache.

 His brother’s room is, uh, well. Remus really doesn’t know what makes his brother’s room that different from his when you get right down to it. It’s like…it’s like looking in two different mirrors. Princey’s room is like that mirror that always shows you what you’d like to see. It’s the one that makes your hair do whatever the fuck you want it to do or makes your eyes glimmer like whatever the fuck you want them to glimmer like. It’s dreamy and it’s whatever and Princey seems to like it. And yeah, okay, Remus isn’t too big to admit that his brother’s good at what he does, even if it’s a little boring for his taste.

 Remus’s room is like looking into a mirror and the mirror looking back into you.

 Remus doesn’t really give a shit about what mortals would rather tell themselves about what it is they really want or don’t want. He’s with Snakey on that one; mortals don’t really know what it is they want, and if they do, they rarely say it out loud. That’s okay. Remus can do that.

 Remus lurks in the darkness, where mortals would rather not look. He delights in the twisted little things that straggle across their brains. It’s so much more interesting, looking at the absolutely horrible things that drift through their little minds and how much it makes them squirm. He’ll never understand why they try so hard to pretend they don’t exist, they make things so much more interesting.

 And that’s the problem.

 Remus is tied to those dark little things and sometimes…sometimes those dark little things don’t stay so dark and little.

 Sometimes they come out and they’re darker in the daylight. Sometimes they take that darkness and force it somewhere it should never go. Sometimes they try and pretend that their darkness is other people’s fault.

 That pisses Remus off.

 Mortals hurt each other. That’s what they do. Sure, they also do a whole lot of other things but mortals feel. That’s what they’re built to do. So it’s inevitable that they’ll get hurt. But the darkness it takes to blame someone or something else for your darkness? That type of darkness makes Remus’s stomach curl.

 Literally. He can feel it squirming around in there.

 Or maybe that’s just the tentacles.

 Listen, mortal forms and mortal-like forms are so stupid, okay? There’s no place to put anything and Remus has to make do.

 When he goes feral, well…different story.

 Remus hasn’t gone feral in a while. Not really. Not like this.

 Not like the agony that was pushed into him by the snake, not like the ants that crawled around in his bones, not like the way it stripped him of himself, layer by layer, until he could only smile until his cheeks ached.

 There’s a fine line between pleasure and pain.

 Then he’d showed up in the garden and seen. Seen this tiny tiny mortal that should never have this much pain. Seen the lines drawn in burned wood in its head, seen the fear that clung to the little thing like water clings to a dead leaf, seen the marks.

 And then they had been so cold.

 Mortals aren’t supposed to be cold. They’re fiery little beasties, even the prissy ones. Their blood runs hot and their little heads like to run themselves silly and they have an awful tendency to burn themselves up with just the slightest push.

 V shivered. V shook. V trembled and his skin had been so icy Remus had been teetering on the edge of going feral before he learned that other mortals did this to V.

 He hadn’t really tried to stop it after that.

 When he had V in his arms, it was better. He could feel V’s darkness scrabbling around inside his head, had been able to wrap his arms around it, hold it tight, feel so much and try and make it settle down.

 Double-edged sword, that was.

 Here’s the thing. Here’s the fucking problem.

 V’s carrying around darkness that isn’t his.

 Whatever monsters did this to him—he shouldn’t fucking call them monsters, monsters were better than this—made him carry around their darkness. Not his. Remus doesn’t even fucking know what darkness is V’s and what darkness has been made V’s. It’s like they picked one person, one person, and made them responsible for everyone’s darkness.

 Mortals don’t like darkness.

 Remus can’t imagine what they must have done if they gave their darkness a singular, corporeal, punishable form.

 Well, no. He can imagine. That’s the fucking problem.

 That’s the main reason why he pulled V aside and told him that, uh, maybe going to his room wasn’t the best idea. Don’t get him wrong, if V wants to Remus will sure as hell take him, that’s cool, but uh…might be a bad time. Thankfully, V didn’t seem too bothered by it, well…not more bothered. Remus wasn’t about to look a gift gulper eel in the mouth.

 Seriously. Uma likes to eat some weird shit.

 The lake is Remus’s favorite part of the forest, just because it’s the only place he really gets to work with his brother. Princey’s great at making everything else but like…it gets boring. Plus, they work better together anyway, even when they don’t agree all the time.

 V’s got a much better appreciation for his stuff anyway.

 Speaking of V, he’s sitting at the edge of the lake, knees tucked up to his chest, idly toying with a branch that drifted over to the shore. Remus paddles over, using his tentacles to keep him afloat as he cocks his head.

 “Find something interesting?”

 V shrugs. “It’s just a stick.”

 …yeah, but like…it could be something else.

 “Wanna play with it?”

 V’s brow wrinkles. “How do you play with a stick?”

 Ignoring the rush of what fucking mortal child doesn’t know how to play with anything and everything, Remus grins and whistles. A few seconds later the water’s surface stirs as something big trundles up to the surface.

 “Ollie!”

 The kraken burbles, wrapping Remus in an arm and giving him a light squeeze. Then it notices V, curled up on the shore, and hums, the water rippling all around it, as it moves toward the edge.

 “Be careful,” Remus scolds as it pulls him with, “don’t beach yourself.”

 Oliver protests lightly, before huffing and reaching out to lay one tentacle in the shallows. V smiles—Remus is so fucking happy V’s smiling now, okay? It’s so good—and waves. Oliver pokes the end of the tentacle out of the water and waves back.

 “Your name is Ollie?”

 “I call him Oliver,” Remus says, patting the tentacle still around his waist.

 “Hi, Oliver,” V says softly, “it’s nice to meet you.”

 The kraken rumbles happily, reaching out for V.

 “Hey!” Remus lightly smacks the tentacle. “Ask first!”

 “A-ask what?”

 “He wants to hug you.” Sure enough, the tentacle near V twitches slightly, water pouring off the sides as it raises out of the lake. V watches it move warily. “he won’t hurt you, V, he’s sweet.”

 Oliver burbles again.

 “You don’t gotta,” Remus says quickly, “if you don’t wanna.”

 V reaches out one hand, trembling slightly as the kraken reaches out to meet him. He pats the arm. Remus grins as Oliver gently taps him back.

 “You wanna play with him?”

 “How?”

 “Throw the stick.”

 “L-like a dog?”

 “You throw dogs?” At V’s horrified face, Remus bursts out laughing. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Yeah, V. Ollie likes playing fetch.”

 V’s brow wrinkles adorably. “Really?”

 Remus grins. “Ollie!” The kraken turns its head to look up at him. “Toss!”

 The kraken rears back the arm and hurls Remus across the lake.

 “Wheee!”

 There’s nothing quite like being flung through the air and splashing down into a nice big body of water. Using his own tentacles to propel him back over to the other side, Oliver trills and reaches for him again.

 “Ask,” Remus chides lightly, only to giggle and pat the arm that curls around his waist again. “You just want to hug? Okay.”

 He turns to V, whose mouth is wide open. “See? Fetch.”

 “That…that’s not normally how fetch works.”

 Remus shrugs. “Ollie likes it.”

 “Do..do you like it?”

 “Yeah, I like it. It’s fun!”

 Oliver reaches out slowly for V, laying the arm next to him on the shore. V glances at Remus before carefully reaching for the stick and nervously offering it to Oliver. Oliver takes it and passes it to Remus who grins.

 “Ready?”

 V nods.

 “Ollie, toss!”

 This time, as Oliver hurls him across the lake, Remus chucks the stick as hard as he can away from him, laughing when Oliver trills and dives after it. As Remus swims back, he sees V scramble to his feet, peering anxiously into the distance.

 “Don’t worry,” Remus calls, treading water, “he’ll find it and come back. He always does.”

 Sure enough, not a few seconds later, and the water parts, revealing a very pleased Oliver and a stick clutched delicately in one of his arms. V’s eyes widen as Oliver holds it out, taking the proffered stick carefully.

 “See?” Remus beams. “Fetch.”

 “Fetch,” V echoes breathlessly, “good job, Oliver.”

 “You wanna do it again?” V nods. “Great. Chuck the stick at me.”

 “Wait, but...what if it hits you?”

 “I’m a fucking fae, V, and it’s a fucking stick. Chuck it at me.”

 Remus catches the stick even if he has to lift himself out of the water to do it. Oliver burbles and Remus nods, letting Oliver curl around his waist again.

 “V,” he calls, “you wanna tell him this time?”

 Glancing back and forth between the two of them, V nods. “Toss!”

 Oliver launches Remus with more enthusiasm than he has in a while. So much so that Remus laughs the whole way across the lake and the whole way back.

 “I think he’s trying to impress you,” he remarks when Oliver zips back and forth faster and faster.

 “I’m impressed.”

 Oliver lays the stick on the grass and reaches out for V. V pats the arm only for his eyes to widen when Oliver reaches further and rumbles.

 “He wants to pick you up, V,” Remus explains.

 “D-does he want to throw me?”

 “I’m sure he’d love it if you let him,” Remus says, quickly continuing when V balks, “but I think right now he really just wants to hold you.”

 V still looks unsure. Remus taps his fingers against the arm around his waist, thinking.

  Hmmm…

  Oh hey wait I’ve fucking got it.

 “V?”

 “Y-yeah?”

 “You wanna ride?”

 V’s eyes widen. “Ride?”

 “Yeah.” Remus gestures around. “Lake’s fucking huge, and there’s cool shit everywhere. Plus, Ollie likes you a lot and he’d be real happy to give you a ride if you wanted.”

 Oliver trills in agreement.

 “…okay,” V mumbles eventually, “can I…can I have a ride?”

 “Sure you can. You wanna swim out and let me help you up or you want Ollie to set you on his head?”

 “I—I can do it.”

 “Cool.” Oliver sets Remus on his head and Remus shifts around a bit, trying to work out where the most secure place for V to sit would be. He glances up when V carefully steps into the water, having removed his boots. Oliver shifts around slowly, arranging his tentacles into stairs that V can use to get up.

 “D-duke?”

 “Yeah?”

 “H-how do I get up?”

 “You can climb, climb his arms.”

 V tilts his head. “What if I hurt him?”

 It makes Remus chuckle. “V, you’re tiny. You’re small and light and you’re a mortal. You probably couldn’t hurt him if you tried, and he sure as hell wouldn’t be doing this if it was gonna hurt. You’re all good, climb up.”

 V climbs, slowly and carefully, always wary about where he’s putting his hands or his feet, until he steps onto Oliver’s head and sinks down next to Remus.

 “Good job!” Remus shuffles a little closer. “Ollie’ll go slow for you, but if you wanna hang onto something, you just lemme know, okay?”

 V nods. Remus pats the head under them.

 “Okay! You be nice, yeah? You’re carrying precious cargo here.”

 Remus bites back a laugh at V’s nervous squeak when Oliver rumbles, starting to move. He scrabbles a little for a handhold.

 “Here,” Remus suggests, flopping onto his stomach, “get low. Less chance of falling off.”

 V just curls into himself, trying to hold onto something. Remus frowns, then carefully sits up as Oliver finishes turning toward the rest of the lake.

 “You can hang onto me if you want,” he offers, “I’m not going anywhere.”

 “Can I?”

 “Mhm.” Remus shifts a little closer, opening his arms. “Or I can hang onto you.”

 Nothing feels better than the satisfaction of having V crawl into his lap, letting Remus cuddle him with his back against Remus’s chest, tentacles hanging onto Oliver. Oliver rumbles happily, lazily swimming around the edge of the lake. As they go, he can feel V start to relax, some of the tension seeping out as he slumps against Remus. Remus smiles, closing his eyes to just feel V not being so afraid, for once, feel that pain start to lessen, even if it’s just the smallest bit. Let a little bit of the darkness be chased away.

 By the time they’re back to the familiar shore, Oliver eases gingerly into the shallows and hums. Remus chuckles.

 “Good workout today, huh, buddy?”

 Another rumble.

 “Come on,” he mutters to V, “you want me to help you down or you got it?”

 “I got it.”

 Remus opens his arms and watches V climb back down just as gingerly, giving Oliver one last pat before sitting on the shore. An arm wraps around Remus’s waist and squeezes.

 “Yeah, yeah, I had fun too, buddy. You go eat something?”

 Oliver gives one last rumble and disappears below the surface of the lake. Remus hauls himself out and flops down on the grass beside V, stretching lazily. Snakey’s got a point with this whole sun-warmed surface thing. He can feel himself relaxing.

 “Thank you.”

 At V’s mumble, Remus opens one eye. “Sure, you’re welcome. You have fun?”

 “Mhm.”

 “I’m glad.”

 There’s another stretch of silence. Remus sits up, looking at how V stares at the lake. It’s one of the only times V’s brow isn’t furrowed. Remus decides he likes it better than way.

 “I like the lake,” V confesses quietly, almost too quiet for Remus to hear. “It’s nice.”

 The note of childish wonder in his voice makes Remus feel…weird. It’s not a bad weird, it’s not necessarily a good weird either though. It’s just…weird. Like there’s something fluffy in his chest, something that really wants to make V always sound like this.

 “Good.” Remus shifts a little closer. “What do you like about it?”

 V thinks for a moment, tucking his knees up to his chest. “I like the water.”

 “The water?”

 A small nod. “Water is good.”

 Something changes.  A little darkness colors V’s tone and Remus sits up a little straighter.

 “…’good?’” He tests the word out on his tongue. “Why is water good, V?”

 “Because it isn’t fire.” V curls in on himself. “Fire is bad.”

 The fluff is gone.

  Pain pain pain pain there’s flames rising higher and higher as the crowd grows more and more restless there are sparks and smoke and the wood burns slowly so slowly so slowly the flames creep higher and higher and the man holds a torch aloft and it burns it burns it burns it’s getting closer no please not now—

 “Duke! Duke!”

 Remus growls, the power seeping through him. How dare they, how fucking dare they, the darkness rolls off in waves, crashing, building, flowing higher and higher and higher and—

 “Shh, shh, you stay behind me, okay?”

 It runs deeper. Pushes. Pulls. Opens his mouth. Tilts his head back. The tentacles writhe. The lake trembles. So much. So much.

 “Duke, duke, I need you to listen to me.”

 …Princey?

 What’s Princey doing here?

 “Duke. Duke. You need to stop, you’re scaring V.”

  V.

 Remus growls again, closing his eyes and swallowing the darkness. It sinks into a pit in his chest and he swallows, pushing it back into the depths and away from him. Away from V.

 He growls, curling in on himself, willing the mass of tentacles to behave, settle down, holding himself tightly and trying to dissipate the extra energy.

 “Good…that’s it. Both of you just have a breather, okay?”

 Remus opens his eyes. He’s by the lake. There’s no one here to hurt anyone. He’s alright. They’re alright. He takes one more breath and the last of the mania settles.

  V.

 He looks over and regret burns a hole in his chest. The prince stands there, having pulled V behind him, one hand held out towards Remus, the other hovering protectively over V. V’s curled in on himself so tightly he can barely see him behind the prince.

 Fuck. He fucked up. Did he…

 “…is he blind?” Remus manages, unable to tear his eyes away from this poor poor thing.

 “No,” the prince says softly, “he’s not.”

 “Fuck.”

 “Yeah.” The prince looks at him with a soft fury. “Come on, Re, you know better.”

 “It hurts, Ro,” Remus mutters, unable to stop himself from slipping into the nickname, “it…it’s fucking painful.”

 “Does it hurt still?”

 “Like maggots crawling under my skin.”

 The prince winces sympathetically. “How do you think it is for V?”

 “I know,” Remus mutters angrily, “I’m pissed about that too.”

 They both stop, looking at V huddled on the ground, shaking and mumbling something. Fuck. Fuck, what has Remus done?

 They just fucking got him feeling safe, he just got comfortable asking for things, hell he’s just started being able to sleep in his room…did Remus fuck all of that up?

 “…ke.”

 Remus blinks, straining to hear. The prince does too, turning his head to look down at V. Neither speaks.

 “…ke…d…ke…”

 Remus’s chest clenches.

 “…duke…duke…”

 The prince drops to one knee, reaching out to gather V close. “It’s alright, V, breathe…shh, you’re alright, sweetheart, no one’s hurt.”

 “Duke…”

 “He’s alright, sweetheart, he’s okay.”

 “Duke.”

 The way V’s voice cracks hurts almost as much as going feral did. Remus watches helplessly as V rocks himself back and forth, his arms wrapped so tightly around himself that he can hardly see where one ends and the other begins. He keeps shaking his head, mumbling ‘duke’ over and over.

 The prince glances at Remus then back to V. “…do you want the duke, sweetheart?”

 “…d-duke…”

 Remus swallows. Please, please let this be right.

 “...V?”

 V keens, one of his hands slowly reaching out. Remus scrambles forward, almost knocking his brother out of the way. The prince merely huffs. Remus stares at V, hoping, hoping…

 “V, can you hear me?”

 “Duke?”

 “Yeah, V, it’s me, I’m—I’m sorry.”

 “Duke.”

 “Can I—“

 Remus doesn’t get to finish his sentence. V doesn’t quite throw himself into Remus, but it’s close. Remus wraps around him immediately, tentacles and all, curling in on V as V clings to him, tighter, tighter, tighter.

 “Oh, you two,” he hears the prince murmur distantly, “what will we do with you?”

 Remus doesn’t much care what his brother thinks right now. All he cares about is having V safe in his arms and alive and warm, holding onto him tightly. V keeps sobbing out ‘duke,�� over and over, slowly growing less and less frantic. The prince sits there, gently stroking his hand through Remus’s hair.

 It takes a while—much fucking longer than Remus would like—to finally get everyone to settle down. They slump there, on the ground, still curled around each other. The prince huffs a laugh, ruffling Remus’s hair before standing up.

 “I think you two,” he murmurs, “should talk, hmm?”

 Remus nods, still holding V tightly. The prince gives him a nod and vanishes back into the forest.

 “…V?”

 V shifts a little. “Mm?”

 “Can we talk about, uh, what just happened?”

 A few seconds pass and V scoots further into Remus’s lap. “…can we stay like this?”

 “Of course,” Remus says instantly, “we can stay like this. I, uh, I wanna apologize.”

 “For what?”

 Remus swallows. “Going feral. Scaring you. Almost blinding you.”

 There’s a moment of silence.

 “…I’m not mad at you.”

 “You’re not?”

 He feels V’s head shake against his neck. “It—I—mmphf.”

 “Take your time,” Remus says quickly, “I’m not gonna let go if you don’t want.”

 “Don’t…”

 He squeezes. “I won’t.”

 V is the perfect little weight in his lap. Soft, not too heavy, just this side of too warm, cuddling into him with the persistence of a snuggle-deprived jellyfish.

 Oh, V should totally meet the school of jellyfish. He’d love them.

 “…no one’s ever done that before.”

 V’s voice is so quiet that for a moment, Remus isn’t even sure he’s spoken. Then he shifts again.

 “No one’s ever done that for me.”

 “…go feral?”

 V shakes his head. “…be protective.”

 Oh, this is not the time to be making such broken, heartfelt confessions because Remus can and will get pissed all over again at everything and everyone that made V think he wasn’t worth protecting.

 “…oh, little monster…”

 If V doesn’t like the pet name, he gives no indication. In fact…V almost burrows into him. Remus tightens his grip again, rocking V back and forth the way he remembers Patton doing.

 “I—I’ve never had—“ V gasps against his shoulder— “I don’t know how—it—I—“

 “Shh, little monster,” Remus burbles, trying really really fucking hard to remember how to do this, “you, uh, you just breathe, okay? I’m right here. You don’t have to know things.”

 “—I don’t wanna be afraid,” V manages, “I don’t wanna be afraid.”

 “You don’t have to be, little monster, you don’t.”

 “Y-you—“

 “Hang on, little monster,” Remus interrupts gently when V’s breaths start to get faster again, “you gotta slow down, come on…”

 They breathe together.

 “…yeah?”

 “You make me feel safe,” V blurts, “and—and I don’t wanna…I don’t wanna not.”

 His fingers tap out an anxious rhythm on Remus’s back.

 “Feral is scary.”

 “Feral is scary,” Remus murmurs in agreement, “and, uh, I’m trying not to do it.”

 He pulls back and gently nuzzles into V’s hair.

 “Don’t wanna scare you.”

 “No one’s ever been angry for me before,” V whispers, “it’s…it’s nice.”

 “Well, I’m not gonna stop being angry at them,” Remus mutters, “but I will get better at not scaring you.”

 “I-it’s okay.”

 “No, it’s not, little monster,” Remus corrects gently, “the others are right. I could hurt you going feral way more than I would hurt anyone who deserves it. So I gotta be better about that. For you.”

 “For me?”

 Remus clutches him tighter. “For you.”

 He’s being serious. Absolute fucking stone right now. This cinched it. He could’ve hurt V really fucking bad by going feral right then. He knows he can’t risk that happening again, so he’s gotta figure his shit out real fast.

 There’s one person he knows will be able to help him.

 L raises an eyebrow when Remus appears next to his desk. “Well, this certainly is unexpected. Is something the matter?”

 “Yeah.” Remus shuffles. L’s room makes him feel like sandpaper. “I need your help not going feral.”

 L blinks. “Well, that’s not what I was expecting. I must highlight the fact that suppressing your nature is not a long-term solution.”

 “I’m not trying to stop it permanently. I just…” Remus twists his hands together. “I fucked up earlier.”

 L sits. “Tell me?”

 Remus explains what happened, from the fetch to the ride to learning that one of the reasons that fucking hurt so much was that they burned—

 “I see,” L interrupts stiffly, his own hands starting to clench, “and I am…proud of you, Duke.”

 Remus blinks. “Wait, what? Why?”

 “Of your restraint,” L mutters, “and of the fact that you recognized that this was a problem and you have come to try and find a solution.”

 Rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, Remus gnaws on his bottom lip, trying to relieve the extra energy. Going feral twice in one day is not a good idea.

 “Don’t do that,” L says.

 “Do what?”

 “Bite.” L taps the side of his mouth. “Not healthy.”

 Remus rolls his eyes. “it’s not like I’m gonna bleed out, L.”

 “No, you won’t,” L says, “but it’s still not a healthy coping mechanism.”

 “So?”

 “So—“ L crosses his arms— “you’re trying to be better for V. V will very much be hurt by something like that.”

 Ah.

 Fuck, that’s a good reason.

 “Okay,” Remus mutters, “okay. What can I do?”

 “What helps you calm down normally,” L asks, “when you go feral?”

 “Fuck, I don’t know,” Remus sighs, “I don’t—it’s not—it’s not like it’s happened recently!”

 “It’s V, isn’t it?”

 “What?”

 “V.” L motions for Remus to sit down, folding his hands in his lap. “V has…a lot of emotional trauma. You are perhaps the most linked with emotional trauma.”

 “Isn’t that Pat-Pat’s job?”

 L shakes his head. “Pat works with emotion, what is currently being experienced. You, however, and your brother, are more closely tied to memory.”

 “So…”

 “So you, more than any of us, even your brother, are being affected by this change.”

 “But it’s not his fault.”

 “No, and neither is it yours. It simply is.” Remus buries his face in his hands. “Not the answer you were looking for, I’m sure.”

 “Really fucking wasn’t.”

 “You didn’t answer my question,” L prompts, “what normally helps you calm down?”

 “Fuck, I don’t know! Calming down isn’t really my strong suit. That’s my birthday suit.”

 L pinches the bridge of his nose. “Focus, please.”

 Remus sits back in the chair. What helps him calm down?

 Well…

 “…safe,” Remus mumbles, “safe makes me calm down.”

 “When you feel safe?”

 He shakes his head. “When V is safe.”

 L makes a noise of understanding. “Your ‘going feral’ is caused by the pain you experience when V is under stress, caused by his past trauma. Thus whenever you can remind yourself that he is safe, and no longer in danger, it helps you snap out of it.”

 “But now I’m the danger.”

 “Are you trying to hurt V?”

 “What?” Remus leaps to his feet, the air crackling. L sits, impassive as always. “No!”

 “Are you willingly putting V in situations where you know he will be upset?”

 “What the fuck is—“

 “Are you?”

 “No!”

 “When you are in a place where you could hurt V,” L continues, still smooth as fucking glass in his chair, “do you try and distance yourself so you do not?”

 Oh. Remus gets it now.

 “…yeah.”

 “Then,” L says firmly, “you are not the danger you believe yourself to be.”

 Remus sits back in the chair slowly. “…said I make him feel safe.”

 “You do,” L says, “more than most of us do, I would guess. I imagine that…having someone be as protective as you are is something quite foreign to V.”

 “Shouldn’t be.”

 “No. It shouldn’t.”

 Remus scrubs his hands over his face, wishing that this was fucking easy, that they could just…wipe them all out. Make the fear go away. Make the scars disappear.

 But they can’t.

 “What can I do, then,” Remus mumbles, “it—it wasn’t so bad today because Princey showed up.”

 “Having another person helped?”

 “No, well, kind of.” Remus twists his hands together again. “…made sure he pulled V outta the way.”

 “Mm.”

 There’s a few moments of silence while L thinks, idly tapping a finger against his wrist.

 “I have noticed,” he says after a while, “that the times when you are most likely to ‘go feral,’ so to speak, coincide with times when V is experiencing particularly high levels of stress.”

 Remus nods.

 “You have also stated that when V feels safe, and perhaps when you are able to make him feel safe, you’re able to calm down faster.”

 Another nod. L’s fucking good at problem-solving.

 “Do you think, then,” L says, “that if we were to help you get better at calming V down, you would, in turn, be able to calm yourself faster?”

 “L, you’re a fucking genius.”

 L blushes too, did you know that? “Well, I…”

 “So what do I do?”

 “Right.” L adjusts his tie. “What do you know already?”

 Remus thinks. “He, uh, he likes to be asked before anything happens, including being moved or touched.”

 “Good. What else?”

 “…he doesn’t like loud noises, or bright lights.”

 “Good.”

 “No fire.”

 “Mm.”

 “He likes the lake?”

 “Does it help him calm down?”

 “…dunno.”

 L nods. “Anything else?”

 Remus thinks. What else, what else…

 “Having his eyes closed,” he says carefully, “helped before, didn’t it? Stopped him from getting super overwhelmed?”

 “That is possible,” L says, “but it is unlikely to be something you try first, as it would require a decent amount of cognitive awareness or physical contact to achieve, both of which are not frequent in times of high stress.”

 “What can I do, then?”

 “How likely do you think it is that you will be able to speak calmly?”

 Remus snorts. The corner of L’s mouth quirks up.

 “Mm. Then it might be better to try something else, then.”

 “Something else?”

 L tilts his head, looking at Remus with that stare that makes him feel like L can see through him. “I have also noticed that with you, V does not seem as…averse to physical contact.”

 Wait, what?

 “When you held him in the garden, when he first arrived,” L says, “and when you rubbed his back. He was not afraid of you, no more than he was startled. Admittedly, this was during a prolonged period of high stress.”

 “W-wait, you’re right, earlier, he—“ Remus wraps his arms around himself— “by the lake, he…he asked for me. He…”

 “He initiated contact?”

 “…yeah.”

 A soft smile comes over L’s face. “I’m pleased.”

 “Why?”

 “Because you, perhaps more than the rest of us,” L continues, “are very eager to protect V. So much so that it leads to…”

 “Going feral.”

 “Indeed. And if V chooses to seek comfort from you…” L raises his eyebrows pointedly.

 “…then…then I can do it that way.”

 “Correct.”

 L gets up, reaching for a glass of water. He holds it out to Remus who takes it carefully.

 “Why’s this so fucking hard?”

 “Because nothing like this is easy, Duke,” L answers, fetching a glass for himself, “for anyone involved. I, for one, am impressed.”

 “…by?”

 “You.”

 “Me?”

 “Yes,” L says, “and how much you have…decided to change your approach.”

 Ah. Yeah.

 Yeah, the last time they found a mortal that had been…mistreated—apparently, Pat-Pat had an issue with Remus calling it ‘super fucked up’ even though it was—they’d died just on the outskirts of the garden.

 “Not with V,” Remus mumbles, “I want V to stay. They were already gone.”

 A few moments of silence pass, then there’s a soft whoosh.

 L sighs. “You can come out, J.”

 J strides out of the shadows, part of Remus’s mind trying valiantly to convince him that he’s been there the whole time. He hasn’t, Remus fucking knows he hasn’t, but still.

 “Where’s V?”

 “With Pat,” J answers smoothly, “eating.”

 “Good,” L says, “difficult emotional experiences should be followed by food.”

 Remus winces. He can almost feel the fucking room get colder. J’s head tilts.

 “I’m sure I know exactly what you’re referring to,” he says softly, “and I wouldn’t appreciate an explanation.”

 L, the asshole, just looks at Remus. Remus sighs and explains again.

 J takes one deep breath and lets it out slowly. Remus bows his head, waiting. Then he feels gloved fingers carding through it and he shudders.

 “Did you need something?” he hears L ask.

 “I was out for a walk,” J says, still stroking Remus’s hair, “by the lake. Something felt…off. So I tried to find the duke.”

 “‘M here.”

 “I can see that.”

 “Needed L’s help.”

 “And did you get it?” Remus nods, not wanting to jar J’s hand loose. “Good.”

 “We do just have the theory, however,” L muses, “and no practice.”

 “I may be able to help with that.”

 Remus looks up when J’s fingers leave his hair. “I’m listening.”

 It’s later, much later, when Remus finally leaves L’s room. The forest is twinkling, his brother sitting crosslegged on his favorite stump. Remus hugs him tightly, thanks him for being there earlier.

 “Of course, Re,” his brother murmurs, “and thank you for being there.”

 “I will be,” Remus says, “I will be.”

 It’s not much later when Remus is walking back to the clearing and a scream rips through the air.

  V.

 The door is locked. It’s locked tight. Remus can’t push. He can’t push. He can’t ruin this.

 The scream keeps going.

 “V! V!”

  Keeps going.

 It aches. It aches and the longer it goes, the longer it hurts, the harder it gets for Remus to keep from breaking the door down. Then a flurry of footsteps and—

 “V!”

 Remus catches V as he barrels out of his room, barely having enough time to open his arms and catch his balance. V’s eyes, wide with panic, settle on Remus’s face.

 “V,” Remus repeats softly, “V.”

 “…duke?”

 “Yeah. Yeah, little monster, it’s Duke.”

 “…duke.”

 Remus eases them to the ground, keeping his arms firmly around V. He draws him gently into his lap, closing his eyes and burying his face in V’s hair, feeling V curl up in his lap, still shaking, still shivering. A bolt of pain shoots through his chest when he feels the raw cry against his throat and his arms tighten around V, trying in vain to take some of that pain and push it into himself. V so desperately needs to stay mortal, to stay V, to feel. The last thing he wants is for this to destroy V beyond repair.

 “It’s alright, little monster, I got you, you’re safe, I’m not going to let anything hurt you, shh, just keep breathing for me.”

 He keeps up the litany of calm reassurances and comforting noises, rocking V back and forth on the ground. V’s shuddering breaths echo in the still clearing. His hands and arms tremble violently against Remus’s back and he can’t tell whether it’s because they’re holding onto him so tightly that his muscles are shaking or if he’s panicking so much he can’t stop shaking. The monster growling inside Remus’s chest starts snarling when V shudders harder.

  No. Not now. He’s safe. Keep him safe.

 Remus breathes. Tells the beastie in his chest to pipe the fuck down. Wraps himself around V and holds him close.

  Safe. Safe. Safe.

  They’re safe.

 “...V?”

 V mumbles, burying his cold nose in Remus’s neck.

 “Hey, V,” Remus murmurs, “can we, uh, can we get you out of the forest? It’s gonna get cold before too long, little monster.”

 V nods, not moving.

 “…can I carry you then, little monster?”

 Another nod.

 Scooping V gingerly into his arms, Remus hesitates. He doesn’t want to take V into his room, not now, but he also doesn’t want to push V too far, to push his way into V’s room.

 “V? Little monster?” V moves a little bit. “Can we go into your room?”

 “…stay?”

 “Yeah, V, I’ll stay with you, little monster.”

 Remus carries him inside, gently sitting on the floor with V still in his lap when he flinches at the noise the bed makes. He uses his tentacles to hold them slightly off the floor. He keeps rocking them slowly back and forth, murmuring safe, safe, safe.

 “…safe?”

 “Yeah, V.” Remus swallows. “We’re safe.”

 “You promise?”

 “I promise.” He adjusts his grip. “…you wanna talk about it? It’s okay if you don’t.”

 V mumbles something.

 “I can’t hear you, little monster,” Remus murmurs, shifting a little, “can you say it again?”

 “…just names.”

 “Names?”

 V clutches Remus’s arms tightly. “…names they used to call me.”

 “Like what? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” he adds hastily.

 V hooks his chin over Remus’s shoulder, still breathing hard. Remus glances around.

 “Can I get you something to drink?” V nods. “Still want me to keep hold of you?”

 “…please?”

 “Sure.”

 Tentacles are useful things. When V has a glass of water in his hands, Remus lets him sit back a little, drinking carefully as Remus runs his hands over V’s back. V’s eyes drift closed and he lets out a tired mumble.

 “Sleepy?”

 “Mm.”

 Remus hums, letting V collapse a little bit more into his lap. He turns V slightly so that he can keep hold of the water.

 “…said I was a demon.”

 “What?”

 “The…others,” V mumbles, fear and weariness warring in his tone, “said I was a demon. That I was…cursed.”

 Words are so fucking stupid.

 Mortals are so fucking stupid.

 “You’re not cursed, V,” Remus says firmly, “promise. We’d be able to tell if you were.”

 “…really?”

 “What the hell made them say you were cursed?”

 V hesitates, little ripples appearing in the water. Remus tugs him closer, murmuring safe, safe, safe.

 “…my eyes,” V whispers, “they said my eyes showed I was…evil.”

 Now that.

 That is truly the fucking stupidest thing Remus has ever heard.

 V giggles softly when Remus says as much, letting Remus stroke a hand through his hair and wrap his other arm firmly around his waist. He slips a hand slowly under V’s tunic, pressing against his tummy and rubbing.

 “Mm,” V hums, “…warm.”

 “Good,” Remus says, “good, V.”

 He shakes his head. So fucking stupid.

 “You’re not cursed, V. You’re not evil. You’re not a demon. Words are fucking stupid and mortals are stupid too.”

 “…they are?”

 “In big groups? Absolutely.” Remus sets his chin protectively on top of V’s head. “You are a smart one. And that’s good.”

 “I’m good?”

 The vulnerable shake in V’s voice coaxes Remus to guide V’s gaze upward.

 “You are,” he says firmly, brushing the hair out of V’s violet, violet eyes. “And your eyes are fucking stunning.”

 He chuckles when V flushes, trying to hide his face in Remus’s neck again.

 “Princey must’ve had fun with you, hmm?”

 “Still is,” comes the mumble.

 “He’s not hurting you, is he?”

 “…no, I’m just…not used to it.”

 Remus hums, closing his eyes. The arm around V’s waist squeezes tightly. At the breath that sounds almost torn out of him, V relaxes.

 “…is that what Oliver’s hugs feel like?”

 Grinning, Remus squeezes him tighter. “You want to find out tomorrow?”

 “…please?”

 “Of course, little monster.”

 V’s not cursed.

V’s not a demon.

 And V’s eyes are gorgeous.

 Words are just fucking stupid.

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[greenninjagal-blog]

Does Virgil from Weightless ever find his skin? It’s one of my favourite fics from you and I’d love to read what happens after!

Oof, okay so in Weightless, Virgil does find his skin! I won’t write it, purely because I don’t have the time :/// but I can give you some run downs of what would happen!!

((This is still longer than I meant it to be oh my god))

First order of business is Patton uses some of his djinn magic to locate a magic shop which is run by a pixie who calls himself Deceit and whom absolutely abhors Patton. He’s sympathetic to Virgil’s cause but he runs a business so in exchange for an actual locating spell that works on people from memory he needs something just as powerful in return.

Logan steps up and offers a bit of his blood-- him being part gorgon gives him potent blood that is definitely is rare. Deceit eyes him warily but accepts it and he gives Virgil the spell. 

((Deceit also reveals the secret that Patton’s been hiding while they’re there: as a Djinn he can’t disobey any order. Which is why he’s always being so helpful and when the others ask him to do basic things he drops whatever he’s doing to complete the task. It also includes things such as “Don’t listen to this conversation until I snap my fingers” while Deceit does just because he’s petty and can.))

While they were out though, their house got broken into and its no longer safe at home, so Roman cashes in a favor with his brother in order for them to have a place to crash. Logan and Patton go over the spell with Virgil which requires the user of it to fall to sleep before its activated. Remus and Roman have a heart to heart which turns into Roman coughing up blood and his own secret being revealed: the reason why Roman acts so scattered brained and often has a hard time thinking about the others is because he quite literally can’t stop thinking about having sex, and if he goes too long without engaging in it his body starts breaking down. He was cursed as a young adult by a vengeful witch who thought they were dating when he thought they were just friends....who sometimes slept together. 

((He knows its not an excuse for him acting like that, which is why he never mentioned it to anyone, but also why he’s always seeking out partners and even though he’s an incubus, he thinks if he never had sex again he’d be okay. ))

Virgil sleeps and the spell works and when he wakes up Logan hands him a map and in a trance-like state marks with a pen where his attackers are.

Remus is really excited to see an opportunity to beat up people so he comes with them to confront the guys. The attackers turn out to be a from a low level gang so there are a lot of them and turns out there were people watching them when they left Deceit’s place, the gang over powered him and dragged him out to their warehouse where they were were in the process of ripping out his wings.

And Remus completely ignores any “don’t kill” suggestions and goes right to ripping out some throats the second he sees any magical creature being tortured like that. Roman isn’t far behind them and Patton uses his magic to help free Deceit and try to heal the places where his wings were damaged. Virgil breaks the water pipes and use his water manipulating ability to defend Patton and Deceit. 

((Patton reveals here that the reason why Deceit hates him so much is because he knows Deceit’s true name, which gives him absolutely control over the pixie, but Patton uses it to make Deceit stay awake through the pain, as he lost a lot of blood and if he fell unconscious now he probably wouldn’t wake back up))

Logan curbs enough of Roman and Remus’s rage to save one of the gang in order to ask him what happened to the selkie skin they stole, (and the gang member looks around at all his dead friends and asks “a skin was worth all this?” and Logan asks him, “Did you not think you were ruining lives by taking things that weren’t yours? Did you truly think no one was hurt by your actions?”)

The gang member admits they don’t have the skin, but that they sold it to these collectors: the Ackroyds, who paid them really well for it, you see? They had all sort of freaky things in their collection and he’d take a skin but he wouldn’t like kill the things and put them on display like those humans do.

And Logan freezes up at the name, noticeably, but the man is hysterical with trying to prove that he’s not really that bad, and before anyone can do anything, Logan takes off his glasses and turns the man to stone.

He puts them back on immediately but steps away from the group and refuses to look at them. He tells them that the skin is a lost cause and that they should give up.

To which Virgil is audibly horrified and angry because they got this far!! And Logan promised him--!! and Logan whips around and tells him that he never made any such promises and that if Virgil doesn’t let it go he’ll turn Virgil to stone as well, because he won’t like Virgil drag all his friends to their dooms.

At which, Deceit laughs brokenly, and asks if Logan go to attempt to make his own collection just like his parents--

And Logan’s secret comes to light: he wasn’t always part gorgon. He was actually human and his parents are mythical creature collectors but they collected creatures like butterflies: killing and pinning them in glass cases. But they often found that some creatures were immune to dying in ways that didn’t desecrate their bodies. Their solution? Find a way to make them ever lasting statues, using their son and a very expensive, unrepeatable experiment.

Logan admits that he remembers the faces of every person that his parents forced him to kill, of everyone who meets his eyes. Its his curse, and he’s always been afraid of it, because one day...he always knew that he’d join their collection too. He ran away as soon as he could, but his parents had people track him down and he was dragged back to them and they began to lock him in his room, and he was not allow out of the house at all anymore. Logan managed to escape by chance just before his sixteenth birthday.

By the time he’s finished talking he’s shaking and his knees give out but Remus is there to catch him and no one knows what to say about anything. 

“I can’t...” Logan whispers, “I can’t let you go there. I can’t... please... anyone who goes there doesn’t.....get out...”

And surprisingly its Roman who speaks up, strangely blithely about it all, “Well, they were always alone, weren’t they? Hey, Specs, don’t you know you aren’t alone, anymore?”

And it turns into a rallying thing where the six of them agree that they have each other, and that they can work together to take down Logan’s parents and keep any more mythical creatures from dying at their hands. I don’t have the actual final battle thing planned out so the rest of this is really but scratched out notes and concepts that if i were actually writing this, would be subject to change according to where the plot goes.

They infiltrate first by using Virgil’s selkie rareness to draw the attention of the Ackroyds.

Unfortunately the Ackroyds are expecting them so they kinda all stumble into a trap and Logan is taken back by his parents for-- and what great timing this is! They have a new rare species!! An archangel who would look magnificent next to the Avians! 

((The archangel is like eight. His name is Thomas and he’s sobbing because he doesn’t know how to use his powers yet.))

But first, its a good thing to take care of the meddling monsters that Logan had first become friends with. Starting with that selkie! And because they want him to look picture perfect even as stone they get his skin and tell him that if he cooperates they’ll let the djinn and the incubi go free (the pixie has to stay though. Its another rarity). 

And well.

Virgil has been holding on to a secret too.

He’s actually the goddamn Prince of the entire fucking sea and his power is linked to his skin. 

Which means that when they put the skin back on him, his abilities increase about 100fold. We stan OP Virgil in this house. Remind me how much of humans is water again? Yeah. Virgil drowns them in their own bodies and frees everyone else.

The Ackroyds have like a lot of people working for them though, so theres a battle that happens and in the middle of it Logan’s glasses get knocked off and broken and Thomas throws himself in front of Logan. Which, because Logan’s gorgon eyes are the same as staring into someone’s soul, leads to Logan staring into Thomas’s divine soul and it literally burns and blinds him.

((Thomas is really sorry, but Logan just starts sobbing thank yous to this eight year old, because now he’s never going to be forced to kill someone else.))

Our heroes win!! The Ackroyds are finished. Patton and Deceit put aside their differences in order to take joint custody of babey archangel Thomas and they, along with Roman and Logan end up living in a beach house together while researching how to remove the curse that’s on Roman. Remus comes and goes, bringing back exotic podcasts for Logan to listen too and bringing news from other locations about monster hunting.

Logan broke into his family vault and took all the money that his parents made off of selling and exploiting creatures and used it all to finance mythical creatures safehouses all across the globe. He trusts Remus and Roman to help watch over them.

Virgil returns to the ocean, just like Logan said he would at the very beginning of the story, although its because he has prince duties to adhere too. And he still sneaks up every once in a while to have dinner with all of them because I’m weak and soft for found family.

[frogs-spawn]

it’s true lads, i have actually written something

(this was a prologue of a long canon fic that i’m writing/on hiatus on (oops) but i was thinking of changing the pov of it, so this doesn’t fit in it anymore) i may end up finishing the canon one, but it is long, so it probably won’t see the light of day, but we’ll see

anyway, here’s the ao3 link if you would like to read it on there: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31116254

a tragic twist of fate:

summary: the lupin family are enjoying a quiet evening, when an unwelcome visitor shows up, changing all of their lives forever.

word count: 1.6k

The sun was setting, casting a burning haze across the sea, and subsequently over the unsuspecting cul-de-sac in the Gower. The pebble-dashed bungalows that hugged the road were quaint and uniform, with a meagre patch of grass out the front that barely constituted as a garden. All things considered; it was a very normal street. There were the Jones', with their tiny Yorkshire terrier, which was small in size but easily compensated with its tremendous bark. The Thomas', who were always out the front regardless of the weather, observing the street's comings and goings. The Liu's, whose windows were constantly filled with an assortment of different lights, illuminating the street, making it feel like Christmas every day. Opposite them, were the Lupin's. There was Lyall, who has a mysterious job that no one is quite able to figure out exactly what it entails; his wife, Hope, who made sure that the whole street was well and truly fed; finally, their 5-year-old son, Remus, who's usually found playing out on the empty street.

Remus, as expected, was having a game of tag with Julia from across the road when his mother called out from the front door. She had thick blonde hair, slightly greying at the crown of her head, which was tied up into a loose bun, the fly-always whipping the side of her face, which was covered slightly with gravy.

"Remus, it's time to come in now. Your father has just gotten home, and dinner's almost ready."

"But Mammy! I'm not even tired," Remus pleaded, shouting back, a little breathless. "Can we have a few more minutes? Please?"

"It's okay, Mrs Lupin." Julia panted, brushing her dark fringe from out of her eyes, it was a miracle she could even see. She was a few years older than Remus but was still somehow shorter than the boy (who was only slightly tall for his age). "I think my parents want me back soon anyway." She turned to Remus and smiled, "We're going to go out and play again tomorrow, aren’t we Re?”

"Yeah, okay then. I'll see you tomorrow! Bye!" Remus chirped back, with some newfound energy. He then proceeded to hurtle up the driveway and stumble through the front door.

“Not even going to give your old mammy a cwtch?” Hope laughed, following her son through the door, shoving her hands into her pockets.

He clambered onto his chair at the kitchen table and watched eagerly as his mother took a roast lamb out of the oven and began to dish it out on to mismatched plates. There were roast potatoes, which were crispy on the outside, but still fluffy and buttery on the inside, peas, carrots, and parsnips - that were roasted to perfection, and it was all smothered with thick gravy that was laden with salt and had the potential to clog up your arteries – but if it’s bad for you then that meant it would probably delicious. Remus’ mouth was practically watering.

"Now, as you've been running around all afternoon, I'll give you the extra roastie, how about that?" Hope smiled down at Remus, scooping a roast potato onto the plate.

Lyall stooped into the kitchen at that moment, placing his tattered briefcase down onto the splintered wooden counter and bent over to kiss his wife on the head. He was tall and lanky with brown curly hair that was just starting to thin. He wore deep navy robes over the top of a well-fitted suit, looking as if he had just walked out of a very important meeting. He could have been a very intimidating man if it weren't for the way his eyes lit up and his mouth formed a crooked grin when he looked adoringly across his small family, with an immense sense of pride.

"This looks wonderful, darling. What did I ever do to deserve you?" he laughed as went over to his son and ruffled his hair. "According to Mrs Thomas, you've been charging up and down the road all day! No wonder you look knackered." He fell into the chair next to him, as Hope brought the dinner over.

The family ate with easy conversation. Hope explained how she had heard from Mrs Thomas that Mrs Jones was apparently putting empty wine bottles into her recycling bin and Lyall explained his new case at work, but it seemed boring, so Remus didn't pay it much attention. He wolfed his food down so quickly, barely stopping for a breath, his poor mother thought he might end up with indigestion.

"Stay in your own lane, Lyall, that's what they said," Lyall explained in between mouthfuls, gesturing at no one in particular with his fork. "They won't believe me though, and that Greyback has been released again, the man makes my skin crawl." He used air quotes when describing him and huffed, as he took another bite out of his roast. "It's madness, I told them that. Did they listen? No. Cases of lycanthropy are going up and it's because of creatures like them. String 'em all up for all I care. Bloody werewolves.”

"Not at the table Lyall," Hope piped in, sensing that her husband was about to go on another one of his world-renowned rants. "I understand it's a pain, especially if no one listens to you at work, but let's keep dinner time a happy affair, don't you think?"

"Yeah, no, sorry love" he gave her a sweet smile, which she returned. "Anyway. Did you have you had fun today, Re?"

The boy looked up and nodded quickly. "Yeah, me and Julia played lots of games. We had a race to see who was faster. And I won!" he exclaimed, talking at the speed of a hundred miles per hour, he spread his arms for dramatic effect and sat up higher in his chair. "She said I was cheating, but I wasn't, I promise!"

"No, of course, you weren't." Lyall laughed and looked down at his son like he was the most precious thing in the world.

After dinner, the family were positioned around the small-rickety fire pit that was positioned in the corner of the patio, made up of broken slabs of concrete with weeds emerging like great vines through the gaps. The fire crackled and spat, specks of charred wood and the burning flame releasing swirling smoke into the atmosphere. They sat on wobbly wooden chairs, that they had gotten from the charity shop, which were starting to rot and covered in splinters. However, Hope had made some colourful and slightly garish cushions, so it was incredibly comfortable, despite the small risk of the chairs collapsing from underneath them. Hope was sat with a pair of knitting needles in hand, focusing on the burgundy jumper that Remus would undoubtedly get for Christmas in a couple of months time. Remus sat opposite and was looking eagerly at his father, who was making the little old wooden figurines of soldiers that Hope collected do an Irish jig across the uneven stone.

Then, there was a rustling in the undergrowth at the far end of the garden. The birds that had nested and settled in for the evening took flight, flying off into the rising moon, bright and beautiful.

"What on earth could that be?" Hope wondered out loud, staring out into the distance, squinting her eyes.

'I'll go check it out.” Lyall chuckled as he pushed himself out of the chair. "Probably just a fox, I shall go shoo it away."

He wandered to the end of the garden, managing to avoid the snail hotel Remus had built a year ago. He lit up his wand so that he could see at least three steps ahead of himself.

It was a surprise that it remained standing, despite the howling gales and torrential rain it had to endure, it stayed. For as long as he could remember, Remus looked after the snails in the hotel, gave them any leftover lettuce. They were his favourite magical creatures. It fascinated him, the way they could stick to the walls and go upside down, the only way that was possible, Remus decided, was magic. Lyall didn’t have the heart to tell him otherwise.

"Ah, Lyall Lupin. Just the man I wanted to see." An unfamiliar voice snarled. The voice was deep and ragged as if it had been strained from screaming too loud "Fancy seeing you here."

“Fenrir.” Lyall cut back, voice curt but contained a small tremble. "Leave me and my family alone and take your unpleasant business somewhere else." He straightened his jacket and stood rigidly, making himself taller. But the figure, Fenrir, stood a head above him, despite his hunched posture.

"I don't think that would be necessary." He countered, his voice becoming more and more menacing. "How is your family? I'd love to meet them." He shoved Lyall out of the way, causing him to lose balance and he stumbled into the hedge.

“Hope! Remus! Get into the house and lock the door!” Lyall shouted, desperately, unable to keep up with Greyback, who was striding across the garden.

Hope quickly grabbed her things and ran, pushing open the back door with a creak.

“Remus, come on lamb, into the house.” Hope coaxed from the door, trying to sound as calm as possible.

But Remus stayed rooted to the spot, unmoving, fixed and waiting, staring into the monster before him.

Fenrir Greyback was a giant of a man, towering easily over 6 feet tall. He was unkempt and greasy, covered in black matted hair. His deceitful yellowing eyes emitting nothing venom. Remus scrambled off of the chair and edged slowly towards his mother. It was too late.

Their eyes locked. A deal had been struck.

Under the silver moon, Greyback's manic grin turned pointed and wider. Bones cracked, twisted, and popped. Hair became thicker, wired, and coarse. Tortured hands and feet transformed into gnarly claws. His previously crooked nose became a leathery, wet, snout.

Barring his teeth, Fenrir Greyback took a couple of paces forward, crushing the hotel under a monstrous paw, towards a terrified Remus Lupin.

And pounced.

[trashyswitch]

A Robot Father's Affection

Virgil is a night guard at a kids restaurant that's filled with human-looking robots that entertain, spread love, and have fun with the children.

Or they were programmed to...

As it's been rumored, the robots are all a little malfunctioned in their own certain ways. One of these malfunctions is in Patton: a fatherly robot who struggles to understand the meaning behind 'hands off'...

This fanfiction was inspired by the Sanders Sides FNAF AU by none other, than @burnadolt on Tumblr!

Here's a reblogged post on the general concept of the AU:

Thank you for the inspiration! And now, enjoy the fic.

Virgil was halfway out of his seat, staring intensely at the screens. The animatronics were moving around again, and heading closer to his quarters, and Virgil was NOT having it. He quickly tried to make sure he had all 5 animatronics in check. Roman and Remus were backstage, practicing their sword fight scene for the next day. Janus (nicknamed Deceit by most of the animatronics) was walking around in the hallways and getting closer to his headquarters. And Patton was-

Oh shit…

Where was PATTON?!

Virgil quickly tried looking for him as quick as possible. He flipped through camera after camera, but there was no sign of the fatherly figure. Suddenly, Virgil jolted at the clanging sound to his right. Virgil quickly ran up and pressed the door closed. Thankfully, it closed completely before the robot could stop it.

Virgil sighed in relief and listened to the sounds of clanging against the door. It didn’t take long for the banging to stop, and for the hall to be clear of robots again. When the cameras confirmed this, Virgil opened the door again and resumed working like usual.

All of a sudden, Virgil’s arms were clamped together by a pair of robotic arms! Virgil screamed and continued to scream and wiggle as his body was lifted off the ground.

“How about a BIIIIG HUG?” A voice spoke. Virgil gasped and resumed his squirming as he tried to get out of the robot’s grip. The voice sounded like Patton’s loving voice. But the voice was deceiving. Behind the loving voice, was a creepy, broken robot with intentions to kidnap, maybe even kill.

“LET ME GO!” Virgil shouted.

“But hugs are good for you! Logan told me that hugs can help kids who are scared.” Patton told him.

Virgil gulped and continued to wiggle. “Not when the hugs are being given by the one thing they’re afr- I DON’T WANT A HUG.” Virgil yelled.

Patton’s robotic eyes widened in surprise as he processed the loud, but clear words: ‘I don’t want a hug’. How can a scared person like him, not want a hug? Were hugs really not a cure for fear? Did...did Logan lie to him?

Patton, feeling hurt by the rejection, slowly let Virgil go. Virgil let himself breathe properly and hugged himself with his hands to lessen the soreness that came with the tight hug. The robot had a good mindset, but...his body was not built for hugs. Virgil turned around and quickly backed away from him.

“What’s wrong? You still seem scared.” Patton asked.

“I-” was all Virgil got out of his mouth before he shut his mouth again. How would Patton take being called ‘scary’? Would he feel rejected? Would he walk away in anger? Or...would he take it like it was no big deal? Virgil didn’t wanna risk the former options. “I am.” Virgil admitted.

Patton walked up to Virgil and was about to hug him, but...he remembered what Virgil yelled earlier and instead, placed his hands onto Virgil’s shoulders.

“It’s gonna be okay. You’re a big boy. Big boys are strong.” Patton told him.

Virgil was...speechless to say the least. He didn’t know how to react at first. So, he looked down and slightly smiled in embarrassment from the childish words. You could tell the robot was trying his best. But the robot was made for kids: Hence, it was going to talk to Virgil like a child whether he looked like one or not.

“There’s a small smile. But can I get a bigger one?” Patton asked. Virgil looked up at the robot and dropped his smile. He was still worried that the robot was gonna kill him. This was just the programming trying to trick him into being happy. It had to be! There had to be a reason these robots were placed aside. Virgil believed it was because of murderous tendencies.

Virgil shook his head and tried to look away. Patton wouldn’t take it though. The left robotic hand came up and tried to bring his head towards him. But Virgil pushed it away. Weirdly enough, Patton didn’t look at this action as a rejection. Instead, Patton believed the child was just being stubborn. So, Patton slowly began smiling and tried moving Virgil’s face towards Patton’s general eye direction. Virgil pushed it away, and tried looking away on the right side this time. Patton transitioned itself and tried cupping his cheek. “Come on kiddo.” Patton begged. “Just a little more of a smile?” Patton begged.

Virgil pushed Patton’s hand away one last time and turned his back towards Patton to signal his displeasure. This form of signal did move Patton up to the next level of help, but it didn’t stop the robot from wanting a smile from him. So, Patton looked down at Virgil’s sides and smiled widely.

“Maybe I can help you smile…” Patton offered. Virgil lifted his head slightly.

“........How?” Virgil asked, turning his head around a little to slightly look at Patton from the corner of his eye.

Patton’s smile widened slightly as he lifted his robotic fingers towards Virgil. The robotic hands managed to get around Virgil’s sides before Virgil pushed away and turned back around to face him with a frown. “I said no hugs.” Virgil told the robot.

Patton paused, and folded his fingers together in front of him. “It’s not a hug.” Patton told him. Then, Patton unfolded his fingers, and slowly reached his hands out to Virgil’s side. When they reached close enough, Patton poked Virgil’s side as a test.

“AH! What-...What are you doing?” Virgil asked, growing annoyed that Patton wouldn’t leave him alone. Next, Patton poked and wiggled a finger on Virgil’s other side. “AH-Hehehe! Don’t poke me!” Virgil warned, attempting to slap the hands away.

Quickly, Patton went into full-on action mode and started poking and wiggling his fingers everywhere he could reach. “AAH! NO! NOhohohoho! Thahahahat tihihihicklehes! Hahahahahahaha!” Virgil giggled, wiggling and turning as a huge wobbly smile spread onto his face.

“Kitchy-kitchy-kitchy-koo! Is someone ticklish?” Patton asked, poking and wiggling his fingers on his sides.

“Yehehehehes!” Virgil replied.

“That’s perfect! Tickle tickle tickle tickle tickle!” Patton reacted.

“Ihihihi’m smilihihihing! Seehehehehehehe?” Virgil told the robot, showing off a wobbly, but genuinely wide smile.

“Oh I see it! But your laugh is so cute to listen to! I can’t stop now!” Patton told him. As Virgil pushed one of the hands away, his back turned to Patton.

As soon as the robot got the free opportunity, Patton wrapped his arms around Virgil and tried tickling his belly.

Virgil just about exploded! “AAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! PAHAHAHATTOHOHOHON!” Virgil laughed hard, practically toppling backwards onto the robot. Patton successfully caught the man and just resumed tickling the heck out of him. “CUHUHUHUT IHIHIHIT OHOHOHOHOUHUT!” Virgil begged.

“Who’s got a ticklish belly? Who’s got a squishy belly? Our night guard does! Who’s the most ticklish little night guard in the whole world? This boy!” Patton teased.

Though the teases were childish and a little mediocre, they certainly made Virgil’s face grow red. The robot was weakening the man and treating him like a little child! Virgil couldn’t tell if this was completely unfair, or if this was surprisingly fun. All Virgil knew was the more that Patton tickled him, the more true the latter option became. The man was growing to love being tickled like this!

Suddenly, Patton stopped. “There. I think I got a good taste of your laugh and smile.” Patton decided. He placed his arms under Virgil's armpits and attempted to lift him up. But Virgil squealed and pulled his arms against his chest. “Ticklish armpits too? Goodness kiddo!” Patton cooed before tickling his armpits. “You’re starting to look like a walking tickle spot!” Patton reacted.

“NOOOOHOHOHOHOHOHO! *snort* TOOOHOHO TIHIHICKLIHIHIHIHIHISH!” Virgil shouted, mentally cursing at himself for snorting.

“Oh my goodness! You’re a snort laugher! That’s soooo cute! Do it again!” Patton said excitedly.

The robot dug its fingers into Virgil’s armpits a little deeper, and managed to completely nail it! “BAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *snort* DOHOHOHOHOHON’T! *snort* TOHOHOHO-*snort* TOOHOHOHO MUHUHUHUHUHUCH!” Virgil snorted and laughed like a mad man.

“Is de night guard too ticklish? Is dis night guard a tickwish wittle piggy?” Patton cooed.

“LEHEHEHEHET MEHEHEHEHEHE GOOOHOHOHOHOHO!” Virgil begged.

“Well gee; I did plan to let you go earlier, but that was before I discovered you could snort! Now I don’t wanna stop! I wanna hear it forever, and ever, and ever!” Patton declared.

Virgil felt like he was gonna die! He was too ticklish for this!

Thankfully, Virgil’s eyes fell onto the sword fighting twins Roman and Remus. He reached his arm out to them without a second thought. “HEHEHEHELP-”

Virgil let out a sudden, high-pitched scream as his exposed armpit was tickled again. “Big mistake, night guard...Now I can tickle AAAAALL of your armpit! And not even your bear trap arms can save you!” Patton warned threateningly.

Virgil threw his head back and WAILED! “WAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” Virgil screamed, kicking his feet as he utterly lost his sanity from the super strong tickles.

Remus bursted out laughing at the sight. “I THOUGHT YOU JUST TICKLE KIDS?! HAHAHAHAHA! SINCE WHEN DID THE NIGHT GUARD COUNT?!” Remus asked, leaning against the door.

“Shhhhh! Listen…” Roman told his brother, placing an arm in front of him so he could shut Remus’s mouth and listen to Virgil laugh.

“Hey Twinsies! You wanna come over and help me out?” Patton asked.

Virgil gasped and looked towards the twins with horror and exhaustion. Did he just ask Roman and Remus to...HELP TICKLE HIM?! Having one robot professionally tickling him was bad enough. But 3?! HELL NO!

“WAHAHAHAIT! PLEHEHEHEASE! PLEHEHEHEHEASE HEHEHEHELP MEHEHEHEHE!” Virgil begged.

Remus giggled evilly. “Please help tickle you?! Wow! We really lucked out on this guy!” Remus reacted, immediately running over to help.

“Wait up! I wanna try his feet!” Roman yelled ahead.

Virgil gulped in horror. If there was one thing Virgil was aware of, it was that he was fucked. Utterly fucked.

Roman ran to the left shoe and started untying the shoe laces. Remus ran up to Virgil’s head and lifted up his arm. “I’m getting his armpits!” Remus announced.

Virgil yelped and tried to move the arms as far away from Remus as possible. But Remus had a hunch that he would do this. So, he tickled Virgil’s neck in retaliation. Virgil squealed and instinctively threw his arms up to save his exposed neck. But Remus stopped and grabbed the wrists successfully. “I gotcha, ya little shit.” Remus declared with a smirk. He lifted one of the arms up and left the other arm free. With the armpit completely exposed, Remus scratched and wiggled his fingers all over the one armpit.

“EEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHA! *snort* REHEHEHEHEMUHUHUHUHUS!” Virgil laughed hysterically.

“Yeeeeeeessss?” Remus replied.

“STAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAP!” Virgil begged.

“No one else is even tickling you yet! Roman is still trying to get the other shoe off, and Patton is taking a break!” Remus argued.

“NOHOHOHOHOHO AHAHAHAHARMPIHIHIHIHIHIHITS! TOOHOHOHOHO TIHIHIHIHICKLIHIHIHIHISH!” Virgil screamed.

“‘No armpits...too ticklish’...Wow...Wonderful grammar!” Remus teased.

“FUHUHUHUHUHUCK YOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOU!” Virgil spat at him.

“Awwww! How nice! Fuck you too!” Remus cooed innocently.

GOD...Remus was BRUTAL! Not only was he a swearing sailor, he was a BRUTAL TICKLER! And Remus thought PATTON was bad…

Roman had finally gotten the shoes off Virgil’s feet, and had started wiggling his fingers on both feet at once.

“OHOHOHOHO GEEEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEZ! *snort* HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *snort* ROHOHOHOHOHOHO-*snort*-HIHIHIHAHAHAHA!” Virgil screamed.

“Hi! Welcome to ticklish feet with Roman! This episode is brought to you by the letter ‘C’. And what does ‘C’ stand for? ‘C’ stands for Coochy-coochy-coochy-coochy-coo!” Roman teased like an announcer.

Virgil squealed and just laughed like the world depended on it. His legs were weakly pulling and struggling to get his feet away, and his one arm was still stuck in the air thanks to Remus’s hand. Remus’s other hand was tickling every micro-inch of skin on his armpit while Virgil’s free hand was clutching his stomach.

Suddenly, Roman and Remus removed their hands, and looked over to Patton. Virgil believed the sadistic robots were done for good.

But all potential hope was thrown out the window when a loud, strong raspberry was blown right onto his belly!

“hahAHAHAHAHAHAhahaha...hehehe...heheh...ohoho gohosh...okahay...a-are you...done?” Virgil asked.

“Yup, we’re done.” Patton replied.

Roman and Remus both let out a sad and disappointed ‘Awwww’. “I didn’t get to tickle him for very long…” Roman whined.

“Me neither.” Remus grumbled, crossing his arms and pouting.

“Humans need to breathe. They have lungs that get tired.” Patton told them.

Virgil happily took in as much breath as he could to make up for the loss of oxygen. He was unbelievably thankful that Patton could stop them so easily. If it weren’t for Patton, Virgil would’ve passed out from lightheadedness.

Something told Virgil they had sketchy intentions. But considering the fact that Patton had chosen to tickle him instead of killing him, showed Virgil a lot;

These robots didn’t exactly go rogue. These robots were originally made for children, and it seems like the robots still have the hearts for entertainment. The robots were just rusty and partly broken.

Maybe with a little love and some slight reprogramming, these robots could go back to entertaining children and serving up smiles and laughs again.

Though, maybe the tickle attacks should have an off switch at certain times. If it weren’t for his adult-sized lungs, he probably would’ve died…

Or maybe he was overreacting...who knows?

It's a little short, but I'm really proud of this fanfiction. Thanks for reading!

[nightashes]

We’re Monsters. Isn’t It Fun? - Chapter 4 (End)

Previous - Masterlist

A/N: This is the end! Thank you to those who have stuck around. And if you are a new reader, thank you for joining. It has been quite the experience trying to find the perfect way to wrap everything up. I hope you enjoy it! 

Summary: Virgil is now a light side. What does this mean for his relationships with the others? 

Warnings: Spiders. Morally-grey sides that make mistakes. Food mention. (let me know if I missed anything) 

ao3 version

Begins directly after Can Lying Be Good?

***

Over the last few years, the bright and cheery atmosphere of the light side has become Virgil’s new normal. He has grown accustomed to this new way of living. He has grown fond of the easy affection, the heavy dose of compliments, and yes even the spontaneous singing. But now, everything is changing once again. Deceit has shown himself to Thomas. He has revealed the existence of the dark sides. 

Virgil chews on his lip, watching his friends, his family as they discuss the latest developments. This feels all too familiar. Virgil has seen this play out before. He has watched as his family has discussed a game plan. Figuring out how this will change their jobs. How it will impact Thomas. All the while assuring that everything will be okay. And what happens next… Well, Virgil would do anything to prevent having to watch his new family be torn apart. Seven mouths. He has only been accepted for seven months. Not even a whole year. But these seven months he has been happy. He has been bettering himself, working with Thomas and becoming a part of his new family. A family that would never leave him. 

Deceit’s arrival threatened all of this. The side that had left him. The side that was trying to get Thomas to lie to his friends. Virgil tastes copper. A flick of his tongue alerts him to the presence of a cut. His lip stings where it is but he does not care. It’s nothing compared to the pain he feels gripping his heart. The way he can almost feel his blood boiling. A fire itching to lash out. To give a little of what he had received. He hasn’t seen Deceit or Remus since that day. But he knows them. And their idea of what is good for Thomas. He has fought their presence. The whispers they send. Because now he knows a better way. But Deceit is here and...

“... looking at it this way. The solution is quite simple and we can- “ 

“The imagination!” Virgil exclaims, cutting Logan off, his eyes widening in realization. 

“What’s that, Virgil?” Logan questions. 

But Virgil isn’t paying attention. He jumps from the couch. Sprinting for the stairs, his mind chanting, “No no no.” 

“Virgil?” He hears. 

His heart is racing. He yells for the others to “Just stay here.” He runs on. Down the hall. Into Roman’s room.  All the while whispering as if it were a prayer. As if these words could change anything. As if the universe would be so kind. “Please no. No. No. Please, he can’t be here. No no no.”

Roman’s door to the imagination. It was bright white on this side. The same door he had first entered three years prior. The same door that had ended his old life and set him down the path to acceptance. And now Deceit could very well be behind that door. Virgil’s hands shake as he takes a hold of the doorknob. He pauses for a breath. Slowly. In and out. Trying his best to steady his shaky nerves. The shadowling twists the knob, pulling it open with the greatest care. The door does not make a sound, but as the gap widens spiders come spilling through. At least a dozen, and every single one of them is searching for him. Crawling towards his feet and up his pant’s leg. Virgil bends to scoop up as many as he can into his arms, recognizing them immediately. They brush against him, caressing him as only they can. Their affection comes pouring through. Their energy, undeniable. Their joy, clear as day. 

“Hi, guys.” The stormy side whispers. His mind temporarily blank at this new arrival. His spiders are here in the light sides’ territory. How could this be? The barrier. It would have to be...gone.

His spidey brethren scurry around his arms, up his chest, and across his shoulders. A couple are nestled in his hair. A few are even inspecting his pockets. He can’t tell but he’s pretty sure there might be some hidden within his hood. Virgil can feel a smile tugging at his lips. He supposes they had missed him. He supposes he had also missed them. A daddy long leg is brushing against his thumb. Virgil raises his hand. Holding the little guy up to his face. The smile spreads as the fellow reaches out to stroke his nose. Virgil could spend the rest of his days just like this. Sitting on the floor, watching them explore his person. But his smile withers as he is reminded about Deceit. If the barrier is down he needs to know.

The spiders shift as Virgil stands. They cling to his clothing, refusing to let go of their friend. Virgil doesn’t mind. If he could, he would never allow them to leave his sight again. Of course, there’s Patton to worry about. But he’ll have to think of a solution later. For now it’s time that he returns to the barrier. 

Stepping into the imagination, Virgil can feel a great expanse of creative potential, much more than there has been for three years. His throat tightens at the thought but still he continues on. The anxious side makes his way towards the woods, seeing more spiders scrambling across the grass towards him. A friendly trail of stragglers leading through the imagination. He scoops up as many as he can. All the time following them back to their source. To the woods that they call home. The dark forest at the edge of the meadow. The territory of the dark sides.

In the shadows of the treeline he sees them, two figures standing at its border. Deceit didn’t just cross over. He pulled the barrier back. Virgil approaches the woods without a word. Remus and Deceit watching him all the while. The foul side is practically bouncing, a broad and toothy smile shining through the dim, his hands carefully clutching something that Virgil cannot see. Deceit in contrast is deadly still. His cape and hat are meticulously placed. His stance is ram-rod straight and his eyes give away nothing of what he might be thinking. 

“Well, hel-” Deceit begins before Remus breaks in with an enthusiastic. “Vee-Vee!”

Virgil is given the distinct impression that the only thing holding Remus back from giving him a bone-crushing hug is whatever is concealed within his hands. 

“Remus, calm down.” Deceit speaks softly, laying a gentle hand against the creative side’s arm. 

Virgil stops across from his old family. His jacket full of spiders and his face devoid of warmth. He scowls across the distance.

“Oh, come now, Virgil. Is that any way to greet your family?”

“I have a new family now.” Remus's face falls at Virgil’s admission, causing a feeling to bubble up within the stormy side. A feeling that Virgil quickly and mercilessly shoves right back down.

“Yes. How could we not have noticed your betrayal?.” Deceit speaks without a care in the world.

“MY betrayal? You left.”

Deceit actually rolls his eyes at that. “To protect Thomas. I had warned you that Thomas was not ready for us to become conscious. And I was right, his hate caused you to duck out. And now you’ve joined the light sides, the very sides that had you convinced you were a villain.”

“At least the light sides never abandoned me. When I ducked out, they came running to bring me back. Unlike my own father. I was stuck! And you didn’t even try to help me.”

“You were conscious. That’s not something you can exactly undo. And Remus wanted to follow you. If we had stayed, he would have chased after you, becoming conscious himself. So yes, we left. We left to protect ourselves and Thomas. He wasn’t ready to meet us.”

“Oh, and I suppose now he is.”

“You left us without any option. You’ve been working against us... with the light sides.”

“I’VE BEEN WORKING WITH THOMAS.”

A flash of emotion crosses Deceit’s face. He pauses, narrowing his eyes. “I see, I suppose now you think we’re evil. Remus and I are just the big scary dark sides. Just here to hurt Thomas.”

“Ugh. Why all the fighting? Can’t we just make up and be buddies already?” Remus speaks up. The others promptly ignore him.

“I never said you were evil. Don’t twist my words, Deceit. I fight against you because you’re misguided. You hurt, Thomas. Just like I did...”

“The light sides have really twisted your mind. Alright, think what you will. We’ll leave you alone if that’s what you wish. But know this, we will not stop doing our jobs, no matter what you or the others think of it. Remus, give her to him already so we can leave.”

Remus steps forward. His hand unfolding to reveal a slightly older but still just as lovely Arabella. “We took care of her for you. I didn’t even try to eat her. Not once.” The rancid side transfers her into Virgil’s hands. His eyes watery but his smile just as big. “I guess I’ll see you in Thomas’s nightmares.”

Virgil doesn’t move a muscle. He simply watches their retreating backs as the two sides head back home. Their home. Not his home. Not anymore. Everything certainly was different now.

***

Virgil is stewing behind the couch. His arms crossed and his chin tucked as he listens to the quiet shuffle of paper, and the gentle snipping of scissors. He is not ready to face the day. But at least he can keep it company. On the other side of the couch sits Patton, hunched over and peering across the pictures that are haphazardly displayed upon the coffee table. Carefully, he selects each photograph before finding the perfect placement and preserving the memory within his family scrapbook. The sounds of his work are like a gentle lullaby wishing for Virgil to forget his worries and remember those who love him. Those who spend their free time combing over snapshots of their time together. Yes, Virgil is content to stay behind the couch. Of course, Patton might have other plans. 

“You know you can come out. I could use your help picking out some stickers.”

Virgil freezes at the words, he presses into the shadows despite the frivolousness of the action. 

“Of course, you don’t have to if you don’t want to. Is it okay if I describe the stickers for you?” 

Virgil says nothing. Simply turns and peeks his head over the couch. Patton gives him a sweet smile before continuing. 

“I’m trying to decide which one to use for Logan. I have a puffy sticker of a planet. I’m not really sure which one. But I know Lo will like it. Or I could use this scratch-and-sniff strawberry one. I thought it’d remind him of his favorite jam. You know the one. Oooor, I could use these stickers of lab equipment. There’s a microscope, and some kind of beaker, oh and there’s a telescope...”

Virgil leans over the couch, crawling over the cushions, and pointing at a sticker of stars. “Go with that one. It matches the mood of the picture the best.” 

“Thanks, bud.” Patton says as he presses the sticker into a corner of the scrapbook, giggling. “It looks like he’s looking at the stars.”

Virgil smiles at the comment., balancing his weight on his arm as he’s sprawled across the couch.. 

Patton flips the scrapbook to a new page and begins the process of looking for the perfect picture. Quietly he hums, “You know, things have been tough lately.”

Virgil gives a tired “mmm-hmm.” Thinking to himself that the moral side’s statement could quite possibly be the understatement of the year. 

“A lot has been going on with Deceit and all of us...” Patton continues.

“Mmm-hmm.”

“It’s times like these it’s important to remember where we came from and how we’ve grown.” Patton runs his hands across the album, gazing as if the pictures were speaking to him. “I shouldn’t have called you all those cutesy-nicknames. You may be a part of our family but that doesn’t mean you have to change to be like us. You’re a protector and dark sides-”

“I’m not a dark side.” Virgil cuts him off.

“No. You aren’t. But you were raised as a dark side, and that’s not a bad thing. Of course you would think being called an angel is an insult. It was erasing that side of you and the progress you've made. So I’m sorry. I was being… inconsiderate.”

The silence stretches between them. Virgil presses his face into his folded arms, breathing in the scent of his jacket. 

“Deceit keeps hinting at my past. About me being a dark side. He’s holding it over my head every time we talk.”

“It's not a bad thing that you were a dark side. The times you pushed Thomas too far were a mistake. You never did it to hurt him. I think Thomas would understand.”

“Not if it’s Deceit who tells him.”

“So what are you going to do?”

Virgil raises his head. His eyes are red. “I think I need to tell Thomas myself.”

***

“REMUS!” A shout rings out through the mindscape directly followed by cacophonous cackling and a slam of a door, Virgil’s door. He looks up to see Remus standing at the edge of his bed. A wild smile, displaced hair, and the heavy breathing representative of a man who had just escaped from consequences. Virgil pulls down his headphones as Remus settles himself at the edge of his bed. 

“Boy, Roman sure does take his ‘art’ seriously. I should have spent more time with him before. Who knew having a second brother could be this much fun? He’s a lot easier to get a rise out of than you are.” 

“Yup, welcome to the light sides. They take everything seriously.”

“I guess that’s true. Ever since you moved here you’ve been no fun. Whoa! Is that Arabella?” Remus moves to pluck a plastic tarantula moving along the bed covers. “She’s plastic!” 

“Patton is scared of spiders. I thought it might help if she was a toy.”

“So you showed her to them?”

“...no. Not yet.”

Remus gently strokes the back of their spidery friend. “You know it’s weird. After taking care of her for so long, I was really beginning to like her. I thought when the barrier came down we could take care of her together.” Remus moves her back onto the bed. “But I guess everything is different now.”

Virgil and Remus watch as Arabella crawls back to Remus, scaling his folded legs. Remus makes no move to stop her. Only whispering. “Virgil. Look. I’m sorry I left you. It was a sucky thing to do. I wanted to follow you but Deceit insisted that would have hurt Thomas. But screw that, we’re brothers. And I shouldn’t have let him stop me. So I’m apologizing. Now can we please be friends again.”

“Remus. I-”

“Thomas and you guys know how to ‘deal with me’ now. You just have to ignore my opinions and everything’s dandy. So you don’t need to push me away because I'm a dark side. And I don’t need anyone to like my idea of jumping out of a car. I don’t need you to say my ideas are good. I just want to have my brother back!”

“Remus, your ideas were never good.” The rancid side pulls away, crestfallen at Virgil’s remark. The shadowling continues, a growing smirk on his face. “They were the stuff of nightmares. They were terrifying. But I must admit they made for the best ghost stories. And I miss the times we worked together. I need to apologize. We made mistakes in how we took care of Thomas and I shouldn’t have treated you like a villain for that.”

A slow smile begins to creep back onto the green side. “Aww! You love me!.”

Virgil smacks Remus in the shoulder. “Shut up, you dork. You’re mushiness is going to kill me.”

“Oooh! You’re never going to guess what dork means. Go on guess?”

Virgil breaks into peels of laughter. His fangs flashing in the dim light of his room. “I don’t know if I even want to. Can’t you just tell me?”

“Ugh. You’re such a light side. Just guess!”

“Hey! That’s no way to talk about your brother.”

“You’re right. Roman deserves better.”

“Ooooooh. You shouldn’t have said that.” Virgil sneers pulling a pillow back. His eyes piercing through the dim with a threat he seldom had use for. “You've just asked for it.”

***

“Remus, that’s too much!”

“Nonsense, brother, we must not be afraid of criticism.”

“I’m not afraid of criticism! I’m afraid that you’re half is taking over my half!”

“Nonsense, brother! My half is preparing for the war your half will eventually wage against my half.”

“It’s a painting, Remus! It can’t wage war!”

Remus cackles. “It can when it is imbued with creativity. MOving Paintings!”

“Gasp! Just like in Harry Potter!”

“No! This one will be even better!”

Logan stares up the stairwell, his hands gripping a stack of plates as he listens to the two creativities. Their voices booming through the mindscape. “Well, I’d say they are finally starting to get along. I must admit, when Remus made the decision that he would be moving into Roman’s room I truly never expected this.”

Patton smiles as he sets the cups on the table. “I think it’s great. Remus just has too much energy, he needs friends to play with. Roman and Remus collaborating together gives them both a chance to express themselves in healthy ways. Virgil, could you check the oven? The baked macaroni should be just about ready.”

“If that’s the case, I think I will go alert the twins.”

“Sounds great, Lo Lo.”

Logan climbs the stairs, calling “Boys, dinner’s almost ready.”

Virgil smiles, bright and wide. Things are changing once again. Although this time it feels like they are changing for the better. He pulls up the pan, the steam rising from the macaroni as he fishes around for a fork to check the center.  Virgil digs through the silverware drawer so engrossed in his task he almost misses the sound of the back door opening. Looking up, Virgil spies a black cape sweep pass, heading towards the dining room table. Full of curiosity, the anxious leaves the kitchen, following the figure to the table where Patton still stands. 

“Deceit.” Patton’s shock is indescribable. “What can we do for you?”

Deceit has his bowler cap off, his hands nervously running along the brim. He stands there like a lost man. “I was... Remus-” Remus comes bounding down the stairs, with Logan and Roman trailing behind. “Dadceit! You came!” Remus rushes up to bear hug the befuddled snake. 

“I- I- I-” Deceit stumbles for something to say. 

“You invited him?” Virgil speaks, his voice hard and cold. Deceit, hearing his voice, turns suddenly. His eyes widening and his features frozen in shock to find Virgil standing there, the anxious side’s stance threatening and overpowering. 

“This was a bad idea.” The snake whispers. His lip close to trembling as he rings the rim of his hat tightly between his fists. “I’m sorry.” And with that, he flees. Brushing past Virgil, practically running for the door. A behavior completely at odds with the cool persona he had always tried to put on. 

“Dad, No!” Remus calls after him. 

“Why did you invite him, Remus?”

“Vee-Vee, he came here to apologize. He’s really sorry. He wants to be a family again. I told him we could all be one big happy family. Light and dark sides.” 

Virgil stares back the way Deceit had gone. The door isn’t closed all the way. Virgil himself has never gone through it. Only Deceit could open the back doors. There is a sense of dread warning him to stay away as he approaches. Apprehension begins creeping up his spine. This place wasn’t for his eyes. But Remus seems certain that Deceit had wanted to make amends. Virgil wasn’t sure he was ready for that. All Virgil knows is that he is not going to allow Deceit to weasel his way out of an apology. If Deceit is finally ready to admit he was wrong. Then, gosh darnit, Virgil was going to hear him say those words if it killed him. He slips through the door. 

It’s… a library. Shelves and shelves stretching off into eternity on both the right and left side. While a second door is directly across from him, only ten feet away. A solitary table sits between the two, ceilings extending high above in a fashion reminiscent of the Sistine Chapel. The paintings depicting the many revolutions throughout history. From the French Revolution to the Stonewall Riots. His curiosity is peaked and Virgil cannot stop his eyes from scanning a shelf of books. Titles flashing by as he moves through the space: Fears I Don’t Want To Think About, Breathing: An In and Out Adventure, The Feeling of My Clothes Against My Skin, Blinking: Think About It,  and  Why Do I Even Have Sides?   Something clicks in Virgil’s mind. This is another part of the subconscious. These are all the thoughts that Deceit works to keep hidden from Thomas. Virgil looks around with a new sense of awe. Deceit’s job is a lot bigger than he had ever thought. Funny, all these years, and Deceit never mentioned any of this. Although, maybe that’s a part of his job as well. Keep it hidden from Thomas, by keeping it hidden from the other sides. Virgil sighs, heading to the second door. It’s time that he asks Deceit himself. 

Passing through, he once again finds himself at the back of Thomas’s apartment. Except this one must be in the Dark Sides’ territory. His old home. And yet, it feels strangely empty. Not just empty, as in no one is home. But empty as in the common room is just too clean. It’s as if he has entered into a still photograph, rather than an actual home. A part of him wonders if passing through the kitchen door has led him into an alternate dimension. But then, again. He hasn’t been home in years. And with Remus moving in with Roman, perhaps Deceit just had more time to clean. A pang stabs at his heart. Now, it was just Deceit here, all alone. Virgil tries to swallow. His throat suddenly feeling much too dry. 

“Deceit?” He calls softly, almost afraid to raise his voice in the stillness. He climbs the stairs to the hallway. Deceit’s door is open. Revealing another empty, impeccably clean room. Remus’s is much the same. His room, however, is not. There. On his bed. The black-cloaked side sits. His face in his hands with his elbows pressed into his thighs. Virgil settles on the bed beside him. He sits there unsure of what to do. 

Without looking up Deceit speaks. “I’m sorry. I was a terrible father.”

“No.” Virgil speaks softly. Sitting beside the black-clad side. “You weren’t. You taught us to be proud of who we are. You told us that we were good. Even when Thomas himself didn’t think so. For that I’ll always be grateful. But..” Virgil stops. Struggling to keep his composure. 

“But I left.” Deceit finishes. “And I shouldn’t have. I was wrong. I was scared. When I saw you beyond the barrier. Trapped on the light side. I was terrified. And I know that’s not an excuse. It’s not. I try to act like it was all for Thomas. That I left to protect him. To protect Remus. Because Thomas wasn’t ready. But I was wrong. The minute I saw you there I should have torn down that barrier. Consequences be damned. I should have… we were a family. I shouldn’t have let anything come between us. Nothing.” Deceit stops. Clasping his hand against his mouth. Muffled, he continues. “I was wrong. And I was too proud to admit that. Because I had to be strong. To be a father. But I was wrong and the minute we reunited I should have apologized. Instead, I just pushed you away. I’m sorry Virgil. I’m so sorry.” 

Deceit stops. Unable to continue. His shoulders shaking, his breath coming in ragged gasps. Virgil watches him. His father, the man that had always seemed self-assured and in control. He always spoke as if the answer to everything was obvious. And if you didn’t see the answer that was your problem. Not his. But now he was apologizing. Virgil reaches across. Placing his hand on Deceit's shoulder. Trying his best to rub soothing circles. Virgil himself was quite numb; he wasn’t sure what to think. But one thing he knew was that he still loved him. And maybe he shouldn’t but a part of him did. Despite their fights. Despite their differing opinions. Even despite the fact that Deceit had left. Virgil still loved him. In the end. Deceit was his father. He had raised him and cared for him for years. He wasn’t perfect. But Virgil supposes that no one truly is. Certainly not himself. 

“It’s okay, Dad. It’s okay.”

Deceit is struggling to smooth his breathing. Virgil chews on his lip, pulling his legs up onto the bed, he scootches closer to his father. 

Virgil leans in close wrapping his arms around his dad, his eyes squeezed tight as he whispers. “It’s okay. We can try again. We can be a family. Just like Remus said. One big family.”

Deceit slowly straightens himself, gazing down at his son’s arms wrapped around him. His heart swelling at the sight. “I don’t know if I’ve earned that, Virgil.”

“You don’t need to earn it. I’m giving it to you.” 

Deceit finally reaches out, returning the hug. A small smile tugging at his lips. "I love you, my spider."

art by @teardroppeddew​

awesome people to tag: @stop-it-anxiety​ @rainboots-are-for-snobs​ @hexatrash​ @ollyollyoxinfree​ @battlebunnyteardropsinthesun​

[sleepless-in-starbucks]

if anon hasn't swung by yet, i'm here to ask what happens when remy realizes when he's in love with patton

Yes hello!! Welcome to: so you’re a gay bastard who’s just met a literal ray of sunshine who’s as fluffy and soft and sugary sweet as a marshmallow. falling in love’s inevitable, but how does the gay bastard recognize when it’s happened to him??? come find out!

set in the Mindscape because I Said So

Remy exists as a function of Thomas

Most functions just live in the Imagination but he’s active enough he gets his own room with the sides

(Technically it’s just a guest bedroom that’s in Thomas’s house- Remy took the memory of it and put it in the mindscape to use, which is why Thomas can never accurately remember the room or its layout when he’s not in it sjdbfhjsd)

That’s not super important but I wanted to say it

Anyways

Remy interacts with the other sides, of course

He doesn’t always get on amazingly with all of them, though

As a technical ward of the Imagination, Remy feels… slightly awkward dealing with Roman or Remus extensively. It’s not like he can’t, it just feels off

He and Virgil can be snarky and sassy together but they also clash a good amount when it comes to bedtime for Thomas

He’s not really ever up against Logan or Deceit, and they get on well enough, but it’s not like they click like natural friends or anything (shocking, I know, given my losleep agenda, but shhhh I haven’t gotten to the good part of this bullet fic)

Patton, however, is the exception

Sure, Remy may not be a happy-pappy optimist like Patton is, but surprisingly enough… he appreciates Patton’s brightness, his sunny outlook, his big smiles and sweet offers

And Patton is surprisingly accepting of Remy’s snark and sass and snap. He finds them amusing, enjoys entertaining his quips and returning them with puns and wordplay and giggles

Their friendship’s a quick-formed one, one that’s usually found chatting in the kitchen while Remy abuses the coffee machine and Patton bakes, but also in the Commons watching various shows you’d never expect them to watch, and in each other’s rooms when it’s late and they should be sleeping but they can’t for one reason or another so they waste the time sipping hot cocoa and talking together instead, and more

It’s good. They’re good.

Remy really should have seen this coming

He has a lot of chances to fall in love with Patton

And he takes all these chances very happily

But there’s only one where he realizes that he’s fallen, and fallen HARD

There were many moments that could have been ‘the one’

Like one of the few times he chose to bake instead of just watch with his coffee, him complaining about the mess while Patton laughed and showed him how to do it

They always ended up with something edible smeared on his face- chocolate or frosting or cookie dough, just a touch normally dashed against his chin or cheeks

And that always ended with Patton carefully wiping away the substance (and once or twice, on more memorable substances, kissing it off- normally when it was a smear of Patton’s favorite cookie dough)

One of those times, when Patton and Remy’s faces were stupidly close, Patton tenderly wiping away whatever mess was left on Remy’s face, Remy’s sunglasses useless to hide his gaze when this close, eyes both on each other, would have been a perfect time for Remy to remember that he was very gay and Patton was very cute

But he normally only remembered the ‘very cute’ part without any context, and another day passed with him left in self-ignorance

He could have realized it one of the times a movie marathon of cheesy romcoms (Remy and Patton both loved the cheese for different reasons) ran long and Patton fell asleep against him, head against Remy’s shoulder and body tucked against Remy’s side

He only got closer to Remy the longer he was asleep, but that was okay. Remy knew a sleepy Patton was a cuddly one. He just wrapped his arm over Patton and held him closer

Patton was always mumbling something when he was sleeping, which was cute, Remy had considered, cute how he scrunched up his nose as he thought before spilling out nonsense words and phrases

Cute how he would smile at whatever his sleepy thoughts were

Cute how sometimes he’d just… happy wiggle. Remy wasn’t sure why, but one minute Patton would be pressed against his side and the next he’d be doing a lil wiggly-shake and then he’d be back to trying to meld his body with Remy’s. It was cute.

Eventually, Patton would open his eyes, just a little, looking tired and sleepy, blinking blearily at Remy but not trying to move away from his side

He’d ask what had happened, when he’d fallen asleep, and Remy would just chuckle quietly and run a hand through Patton’s hair and say it’s alright, go back to bed, he’d take care of it

And Patton would just nod and lie his head against Remy again and be asleep almost immediately

And soon enough Remy would slowly, carefully, gently pick Patton up and move him to his bed, staying just long enough for Patton’s blankets and sheets to warm up and mimic his own warmth- hence making Patton willing to release him- before leaving

And if he lingered a moment in the doorway before leaving, wishing he could stay, could curl up with Patton and kiss his forehead and fall asleep with him?

Well… Patton was warm and cute and cuddly. Who wouldn’t want to sleep and cuddle with him? That was a Normal Friendship Thought to have. It didn’t mean anything!

And once more, His Sunglasses Make Him Oblivious Remy strikes again

Incidents similar to the baking ones and the sleepy ones continue to happen

Remy spends a good two hours doing nothing but trading horrible puns with Patton because they make Patton giggle and chuckle and LAUGH and for some reason Remy just realized he could listen to that laugh for weeks and if puns causes it… then puns he shall tell

He learns to do basic sewing because Patton accidentally rips his catigan a lot and yes Patton can sew and he does fix his own tears but Remy likes to sneak in and fix them when Patton’s busy (Patton always gets excited, later, having decided that he’s got some sort of guardian angel looking out for him but unsure who. Patton’s happiness over the whole thing’s enough for Remy- he never admits it’s him)

When Patton’s doing something/is distracted, Remy will sneak up behind him and pick him up and spin him in a half-circle and Patton will giggle and Remy will never feel more alive than he does every time he does it

There’s a lot of moments like these, where Remy turns into an absolute sap over Patton doing something as impressive as Smiling, and yet Remy throughout it all, Remy refuses to just realize ‘oh hey shit I’m in love’

Finally, however, not even Remy’s thick dark sunglasses and mindset of ‘what is love (baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more)’ can stop him from realizing how lost he is on this boi

It all happens one late night

Remy’s sleepless and up and wandering

He notices, eventually, that the light’s on in Patton’s room, and he figures, hey! late-night buddy, let’s say hi

The hi was well-timed, but not for the reasons Remy had hoped

Remy peeks in the crack and finds that, yeah, Patton’s up, but he’s also hugging a body pillow and his eyes are a little red and there’s a tiny bit of sniffling and okay someone’s not having a good night and for once it’s not Thomas as Virgil slowly goes through decades-old memories

Remy had been looking for someone to goofy off with at two am but now it is Comfort The Fluffball time and he is READY for this mission

He doesn’t go in immediately- pulling away and quietly making his way downstairs first, quickly making two mugs of hot cocoa, putting in plenty of mini marshmallows in Patton’s (and bringing the bag of them as well, for when Patton inevitably wants to snack on them)

Then he goes back upstairs, lightly bumping Patton’s door with his foot until he hears a loud sniffle and Patton hastily whisper-shouting to give him a moment

Remy waits, listening to the shuffling noises, well-aware that Patton’s cleaning his face off, trying to hide his self-perceived sin of feeling bad

Eventually, the door opens, Patton’s eyes still red as he refuses to meet Remy’s, aware the function has likely already guessed he’s not doing amazingly

His eyes light up, a bit, however, when he sees the cocoas and the marshmallow bag beneath Remy’s elbow and Remy’s gentle ‘I’m here’ smile, and Remy feels his heart light up at that

Patton lets him in, taking his mug and the bag of marshmallows from Remy as he does so, moving back on to the bed and leaning against the body pillow he had been crying into a moment ago (Remy can tell because the top of it’s damp) and he gestures for Remy to join him

And Remy does, sitting down right next to him, pressing against his side and resting his head against Patton’s

They don’t speak, just sipping their cocoas and being close

They’ve talked about it before, Patton’s tendency to repress his bad emotions and isolate himself from help

And Remy knows Patton’s trying

Patton letting him in is trying

So Remy’s not going to talk about it, because that’s not what Patton needs now. He needs to be able to be safe with someone. To be comfortable, to be un-judged despite the tear tracks on his cheeks

Remy’s halfway done with his cocoa when he lightly bumps Patton’s foot. He’s wearing bright mis-matched socks whereas Remy’s got black ones with coffee cups on them, the steam coming out of them in the shape of z’s (Patton gave them to him, and ever since, Remy’s always worn socks at night)

A smile twitches onto Patton’s face as he bumps Remy’s back

It’s small

It’s important

Eventually, they finish their cocoas

Patton places his mug on his bedside table, automatically accepting Remy’s and moving it there too

He takes the marshmallow bag, then, pulling a few out and squishing them between his fingers as he pops a few in his mouth

Remy smiles, watching Patton amuse himself with the marshmallows for a moment before asking, softly, ‘do you want to watch some tv? or do you think you’re ready to go to bed?’

‘bed’ Patton answers immediately. he knew the question was coming. Remy always asked it on nights like this.

‘of course’ Remy answers easily, beginning to stand up, moving to take the mugs away and part with a few words of reassurance and a reminder that Remy’ll find someone to cover making breakfast in the morning, please, Patton, sleep in

He’s stopped when Patton grabs his arm, just lightly tugging on his arm and pulling Remy back to sitting beside him

‘please stay’ Patton asks, quietly, but still fiercely, as if if his voice wasn’t strong enough, his want for this not there enough, Remy would say no (Remy knew he never would’ve so much as dreamed of saying no)

‘of course’ Remy repeated as the moral side tossed the marshmallow bag onto his bedside table. ‘how long do you want me to stay?’

‘until- I mean- until I fall asleep?’ Patton settled on, hesitantly

Remy frowned as he gently reached out, cupping Patton’s cheek with one hand. he didn’t press, since he knew Patton wouldn’t tell him what he really wanted if pressed. he’d clam up and stick to his lie. he had to be given time.

Patton leaned the slightest into the touch, letting the silence hold for a moment before he said, quietly, ‘I don’t want to be alone’

‘you won’t be’ Remy murmured back, easily coazing Patton into his arms, happy to let the moral side fold into his chest, pressing himself ever closer to Remy as Remy held him ever tighter

He slowly tugged Patton over, pulling Patton’s duvet over the two of them as he settled them down amongst the pillows of Patton’s bed, the lights in his room turning off at Remy’s mental urging

Patton moved with him easily, happy to be held, snuggling close against Remy and tucking his head beneath Remy’s neck and tangling their legs together and more or less enuring that Remy wouldn’t be getting up until he did (not that Remy minded)

Soon enough, they were still, Patton breathing deeply, very quickly falling asleep as Remy rubbed circles into his back

‘hey, Remy?’ Patton asked, words slurring as he fought the call of sleep to say whatever he had to say

‘yeah, babes?’

‘thank you, for... for everything’

Remy smiled, a stupidly sappy smile, safely hidden in the dark. ‘of course, Pat. always happy to help.’

Patton hummed in agreement to that, nodding a bit against Remy’s chest. when he didn’t say anything more, Remy thought he had fallen asleep, until Patton said one last thing,

‘I love you’

It wasn’t that surprising- Patton had said it before, and so had Remy, normally after Remy had complimented Patton’s cookies or after Patton showed a complete lack of shame for a rather terrible pun- but he had never said it like this before, so quietly, so simply, so meaningfully

It took him a moment to collect himself enough to respond, and by then Patton had fallen asleep, but it didn’t matter, because Remy still said it,

‘I love you too’

And that, dear reader, is when Remy realized just how heavy the weight behind those words was

That’s when Remy realizes he’s in love

Anddddd because I’m a bastard (and also tired and said I’d post this today) that’s where this ends, even though I now remember the question was ‘what happens when Remy realizes he’s in love with Patton’ and not ‘how’ he realizes, but shhhhhhh enjoy what I gave you

And like,,,, I’m not saying I’ll give this a part two if y’all want to see what happens after Remy finally comes to terms with the fact that he’s in love with the sun, but like... I def will just hmu sometime sdfjsvfsdf

[teenytinystorage]

Operation Double Date

Remus wants to ask Deceit out on a date, and he attempts to do exactly that in quite possibly the dumbest way ever. Logan and Virgil are there too.

Warnings: Multiple food mentions, multiple death mentions (but just as humor, no one actually dies), cannibalism mention, censored cursing, inappropriate remarks, Remus being Remus (aka one murder mention & a non-descriptive amputation mention), minor anxiety/panic depictions

Word Count: 4,720

Genre: RomCom

Pairings: Demus/Dukeceit + Platonic Analogical

I hope y’all like my first comedy-centric fic!! Enjoy :>

-

Virgil scoffed. “You do realize this is a terrible plan, right?”

Remus started to pace.

“Quite so,” Logan added, “Why can’t you just court him yourself?”

“Because, uh… I don’t know! I don’t know if he likes me or not and this just seems like a better solution!”

“First of all, me and L aren’t even together,” Virgil leaned his head back onto the couch, staring up at the ceiling.

“And even if we were,” Logan started.

“--Theoretically.”

“--Yes, theoretically romantic partners, I wouldn’t surmise that either of us would be content with going to a clamorous production for our first outing.”

“It’d give me too much social anxiety and Lo just isn’t the type for loud metal music. And ‘Cobra’ would totally get suspicious about it! He may be a clueless moron, but he’s not a fool.”

“Hey, only I can use Cobra for his nickname! It’s mine,” Remus pouted, hurling his hands towards the ground.

“Virgil’s correct, though. So why is this a better solution again?” Logan raised an eyebrow.

“Listen, could you guys just do this one favor for me?” Remus threw his hands up. “It’ll work great. He loves spying out and being all sneaky and cute and stuff. Virgil is his nemesis and Logan, you’re my nemesis, so it’ll be a great spying session together! It’ll be perfect! It’ll be like we’re not even on a date at all. Casual.”

Virgil and Logan still weren’t convinced.

“You guys still owe me for the bottle of Hidden Valley ranch I chugged last week that you bet I couldn’t chug,” Remus aimed an accusatory pointer finger at Logan and Virgil.

“We never bet that,” Logan pointed out. “You just wanted to guzzle ranch dressing like you would a glass of water after a temperate summer day, and we watched you do it, in front of us. It was deplorable.”

“I still have chills from seeing that,” Virgil shivered. “Ugh..”

Remus defeatedly sighed. “Okay, okay, I get it. You guys are right. But please? I really want to go out with him but I have no idea how he feels about me and I’m too scared he’ll say no. Could you just please do this for me?”

“Wait, let me get this right, let me make sure I’ve got this one-hundred percent down,” Virgil lifted his hand. “So you want me and Logan to go on a concert ‘date’ to see bands we don’t know and don’t care about when we aren’t even together just so you can convince Deceit to come spy on us with you so you can nonchalantly go on a casual date with him and then… what, go out with him?”

A pause. “Yes.”

Logan immediately replied “No.”

“Please! I’ll pay for the tickets. And the concessions. And the band shirts too! It’ll be fun! Please???”

The two started to consider it, albeit reluctantly.

“And I’ll never drink another bottle of ranch ever again.”

“You got a deal,” Virgil nodded.

Remus lit up with a beaming smile, shaking his arms and squealing, almost bouncing right off the carpet.

Virgil leaned over to Logan. “It’s weird to see him excited like this. It’s like he’s Patton or something.”

“Agreed. Him being expressive in wholesome emotions is as common an occurrence as aerodynamic swine.”

“Thank you so so so much!” Remus cheered, running over to the couch and lifting up both Logan and Virgil in a ginormous bear hug. Swol.

“Yep-- sure thing, can you please put us down now?” Virgil choked out.

“Oh. Right.” Remus dropped the two of them back onto the couch.

“So this shall be occurring Friday evening?” Logan confirmed, fixing his glasses that were askew from the landing.

“According to the schedule, yeah! I’ll bring over the tickets by tomorrow. Thank youuuu~!”

“You’re, reluctantly, welcome,” Logan nodded.

“I’ll take it!” Remus shouted as he immediately sunk down into his room.

And thus began the terrible plan.

-

It started off simple enough. The plan was set into motion the day Remus bought the four tickets, two for the “couple” and another two for himself and Deceit. He then decided to approach the matter of asking Deceit to go spy with him in a nonchalant, calm, put-together, casual way.

“Deceit, Deceit, you won’t belieeeeve what I heard Virgil and Logan are doing this Fridayyyy!” Remus yelled, just having risen up into Deceit’s room.

Deceit set down the book he was in the middle of reading. “What did you hear?”

“Oh my gosh!” Remus pranced over, rolling himself over the top of Deceit’s couch and collapsing onto its cushions stomach-down, holding his chin in his hands and waving his legs back and forth. “I heard that they’re going out on a date together!”

Deceit crossed his left leg over his right one, holding his hands together in his lap. “Really?”

“I swear, it’s true! I just overheard them. Oh it was so sweet and adorable and disgusting. You should’ve heard the cutesy things Virgil said to Logan, you would’ve love-hated it so much.”

Deceit started to smirk. “Truly horrid. Did you happen to hear where they were going?”

Remus cackled loudly. “Ohohoh, you bet I did! They’re going to the punk band concert across town. We have got to go and see what they’re doing out there!”

“Certainly,” Deceit agreed. “I remember the outdoor concert stage has a chain-link fence around it that we can hide behind to watch through. You remember, from the other time we spied on Virgil?”

“There’s no need for scouting around fences and thorny bushes!” Remus grinned, flaunting two tickets in his hand. “I already bought us tickets.”

“My my, Squid, such a rascal!” Deceit teased. “We are absolutely going.”

Remus smiled pridefully. His plan was working!

Now all that was left was the entire rest of the plan and making sure this thing didn’t hit the fan. Oh, right. Whoops. Remus forgot about that.

-

About a half-hour before the performance was when the actual plan’s doings started.

Remus, Logan, and Virgil all met outside the concert entrance by the chain-link fence. And Remus, to say the least, was disappointed.

“You two look like this is some Saturday lazy-day shindig!” Remus scoffed.

“I thought this was a casual gathering, wasn’t it?” Logan asked, dressed in a checkered flannel short-sleeve and denim jeans.

“Yeah, but you’re too casual! Where’s the style, the finesse, the pizazz? I’d wear these outfits to my own court trial, and that is not a good thing!”

“What’s wrong with casual?” Virgil asked, dressed in an oversized black hoodie and black jeans.

“You’re supposed to be going on a date together!”

“So?” Logan continued.

“These outfits!” Remus gestured madly. “They aren’t date-worthy!”

“You’re not that fancily dressed either, Mr. Only-Tuxes-On-Dates.”

Virgil was justified in that comment, seeing as Remus was dressed in a thin gray tank top and short black biker shorts, the combat boots he wore not adding anything to his leg coverage.

“Deceit doesn’t know that this is a-- oh whatever. You two know what to do, right?”

“As in what to do in order to imply that Virgil and I have romantic relations with one another?” Logan affirmed.

“Yes. Holding hands, leaning on the shoulder, maybe a peck on the cheek if you’re feeling a bit special. Got it?”

“Sure. Don’t expect me to be all touchy-feely, though,” Virgil shrugged. “That’d just make Deceit even more suspicious.”

Remus peered over his shoulder and quickly panicked. “He’s coming!”

“Speak of the devil,” Logan commented.

“Here’s your twenty bucks, spend it on whatever you’d like,” Remus shoved a twenty dollar bill towards Virgil, who grabbed it hastily and stuffed it in his hoodie pocket. “Ok, good? Go to the stage! Quickly!” Remus stammered out, shoving Logan and Virgil towards the concert entrance that was decked out with metal detectors and security and all.

“You’re welcome,” Virgil snidely remarked, before walking away saying “You know idioms, L?”

“I do know some.”

Remus then started to nervously whistle as Logan and Virgil entered the stage together, his whistling having added nothing to the cool persona he tried to assume as he leaned on the chain-link fence, one foot up and the other on the ground, and tilted his head up towards the starry night sky, a.k.a. Cool Guy 101, despite being in Florida heat and not being any bit ventilated whatsoever.

He quickly snuck a few glances at Deceit, who slowly approached the stage with his hands in his leather jacket pockets, his Converse-clad feet stepping against the sidewalk, his black jean-clad legs swishing against each other, his hair that was tucked into a floppy black hat waving slightly as he walked, and he still didn’t notice Remus yet on his way over.

He then, soon after, did notice Remus and lit up with a sly smile. Remus, in turn, gave back the same sly smile. Or at least he thought it was sly; maybe his smile pertained more to those exuberant drool-dripping bulldog beamings than it did a smile of a Cool Guy 101.

“Can you believe that they’d have such good taste for venues?” Deceit greeted. “I’d suspect they would’ve taken a spot at the local Barnes & Noble for their first date, if not a dusty old library filled with mites.”

“Right? That or an abandoned haunted house,” Remus added, causing Deceit to add a chuckle in response. “I just saw them go in!”

“Well then, we have to follow along!” Deceit locked his arm in Remus’s and speedily guided them over to the concert entrance, to which Remus immediately panicked because OH GEEZ ALMIGHTY HE GRABBED ONTO MY ARM ALREADY THIS IS GOING WAY BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD.

They handed over their two tickets, explored the concessions venue and the merch stands, both of which being insanely overpriced (as Deceit put it, “I could buy a car for the same price of this whole merchandise stand,” and as Remus put it, “I could bail myself out of jail for manslaughter with that much”), and eventually grabbed their standing spots near the back left of the crowd, a perfect viewpoint for the middle right spot Virgil and Logan managed to nab.

Perfect! The plan was going great. Now just to make sure the concert went well, and that Virgil and Logan didn’t mess this whole romance thing up before Remus did (or more than Remus already had). Oh boy.

-

As the night continued and as the real spying began, it became painstakingly obvious that Deceit could tell something was off.

“They aren’t even holding hands,” Deceit whisper-yelled under the blare of the speakers that just were starting to rev back up once another punk band took the stage, dyed mohawks and piercings and all. “You’d think they’d be more like--” Deceit quickly grabbed Remus’s hand and lifted it in the air, cheering loudly “Wooo!”

And as Deceit grabbed his hand and lifted it into the air, Remus started to feel himself slip into what is diagnosed clinically as the terrifying “gay panic,” and if the crowd cheering and the guitar riffs weren’t as loud, his cursed emoji heavy breathing would be the loudest noise at the concert.

Deceit then quickly let go of Remus’s hand afterward, giving Remus a moment for his heart to restart from its brief 5k marathon inside his ribcage.

There were a few of those moments interspersed between blaring music and Deceit’s skittish gossip, such gossip being:

“Do you see that? Only halfway through do they even brush palms. What is this, some sort of middle school dance?” Deceit chittered.

Remus, of course, laughed and agreed outwardly, but inwardly he ran over to Logan and Virgil and slapped them so hard their faces turned as pink as a rare-cooked filet. No, not rare, an uncooked filet. How could they mess something as easy as holding hands and shoulder leaning up so bad?!

Although, thankfully, Deceit never seemed suspicious of this activity or doubtful of them going out together; he just gossiped about it and made scathing commentary of the two sides, which was pretty funny to listen to.

It was also strangely personal and revealing as well.

“If this is the stuff that passes for a romantic relationship, we might as well already be married,” Deceit commented at one point during the show when the final band was being announced.

“Hah! Right?” Remus agreed, but he was, once again, dying of gay panic internally. Did Deceit mean anything by that, getting married?! Send some clear signals here, dude, Remus cursed internally, ‘cause right now they’re more mixed than a Russian roulette bowl of M&Ms and Skittles and aquarium gravel! And Remus would only willingly eat one of those! (Hint, it’s not the edible options.)

Deceit gave a short chuckle in response before ushering him and Remus out of the concert hall so Logan and Virgil wouldn’t find them spying.

“Thanks for taking me along to spy,” Deceit bopped Remus in the arm, grinning, as they walked out. “That was fun!”

“Yeah!” Remus smiled widely, his teeth shining through his pointed lips. “We’ve got to do this again!”

“For sure. Let me know when they’ve got another ‘date,’” Deceit used air quotes, causing Remus to let out a hearty belly laugh in response.

“Seeya,” Deceit waved his hand and started to walk back home.

“Bye.”

Remus stared in lovesick longing, holding onto the part of his arm that Deceit bopped. Remus wondered if he could amputate the arm and keep it in his room to admire. He can regenerate limbs, right? He’s technically imaginary. It’d be like refusing to wash your face after someone pecks you on the cheek, except even gorier and also very much creepier.

Before he could decide that, though, the concert hall emptied into the sidewalk and across the various crosswalks around the busy street. And soon enough Logan and Virgil walked out together, arm-locked-in-arm, talking together.

They then spotted Remus and saw no Deceit around. Virgil slipped his arm out of Logan’s and headed over.

“So how was your ‘playdate’?” Virgil mocked.

“Hah!” Remus cackled, “If anyone was play-dating out there, it was you two. I can’t even count the number of times he pointed out how virginal you both were for holding hands!”

“Personally I thought we were quite convincing as a romantic pair,” Logan commented, “Not all couples have to be favorable towards PDA, you know.”

“Sure, sure. But where’s the fun in that?” Remus shrugged.

“Whatever. We went to your concert and did your date thing,” Virgil grumbled. “At least it’s over now.”

A car zoomed by, kicking loose gravel up onto the sidewalk.

“Go on another date!” Remus blurted out.

“What?” Logan and Virgil uttered at the same moment.

“You have to!” Remus started. “I told Deceit that we’d have to go on another one of our spying sessions and it’d be stupid to say that you went on just one date together!”

“We only acceded to one date,” Logan started.

“And if you aren’t little b*tches, you can go on another,” Remus scoffed. “How hard can it be?”

“hOw hArD CaN It bE?” Virgil mocked. “I think I’m gonna lose my hearing by 40 thanks to that scream-fest if you’re that curious.”

“That still means you got a good 10 years left. And you might as well go on another! It’ll be fun. And hey, you guys can go somewhere you’d like this time. My treat.”

“Your treat my a**,” Virgil huffed.

“I’m assuming nowhere in the house nor at any public library counts as an ideal date spot to you.” Logan rolled his eyes.

“No, actually, those could work.” Remus’s eyes brightened up. “Yeah! Those could work!”

“Wait, really? You were just talking about how we were supposed to be wearing suit-jackets to this concert thing, like, 2 hours ago.” Virgil tilted his head. “How can either of those places meet your standards, oh modern reincarnate of Eros himself?”

“I’m flattered by that, Virgin Sanders,” Remus bowed, Virgil grumbling all the same, “but really, where were you thinking of inside the house?”

“I’m not entirely sure. Your room, Virgil?” Logan turned to the anxious side, who just shrugged and mumbled in response “Sure.”

“Great!” Remus clapped. “This’ll be great. Me and Dee already know the best hiding spots there where no one can find us, so that’ll be a piece of cake.”

“How do you know th--”

“That’s beside the point!” Remus interrupted. “That is a fabulous idea! Oooh, I’ll have to tell Dee all about this. Thank you thank you thank youuuuu~! Toodaloo!” Remus cheered, waving his hand and briskly walking down the sidewalk and back to the house, thinking all the while about the next date.

“Seriously, how do Remus and Deceit know where to hide in my room?”

-

Now, of course, the second date went on as the first did. Deceit and Remus spied on Logan and Virgil doing vaguely friend/couple things, Deceit mocked them a few times and Remus narrowly avoided death from gay panic much more than a few times.

But, of course, there had to be the inevitable “Let me know when they’ve got another date” from Deceit at the end of the spying session.

And, okay, sure, Remus and Logan and Virgil only agreed on one more date, but Remus thought that it should be fine to violate that plan for just one more, right? Also Remus has no self-control and it’d be easier for him to find a frog with sixty legs than to deny himself.

“No! How many times do we have to tell you this?” Virgil groaned.

“Pleaseeee!!!” Remus whined, “I swear, this’ll be the last oneeeee!”

“That’s precisely what you promised when you brought a raccoon into the living room last week before you proceeded to bring in four more throughout the rest of the week.” Logan regarded. “How can we possibly confide in your claim this time?”

“But it’s fuuuuuuun for you twooooo…” Remus fussed, collapsing onto the floor like a toddler having a tantrum in the middle of a grocery store because mom said no fruit snacks. “And it’s fun for me and Deeeee…”

“You know what?” Virgil threw his hands up. “Fine. If we go on another date and it’ll make you stop whining, we’ll do it. But just one more.”

Little did Virgil know him and Logan would proceed to go on three more dates together.

The whole situation escalated from a movie date to hanging out in Logan’s room playing board games to a high class dinner, fancy clothing requirement and all. How Remus convinced them to go? No one knows.

(He said he’d pay with Thomas’s credit card and he dressed them both up all fancy-like for free with the finest of the mindspace boutique, aka Roman dressed them and Remus dolled over them the whole time.)

In the end, Logan and Virgil did indeed end up going on a “date” to an ornate restaurant together, dressed in usual navy blue tie and black polo with an added white suit jacket and a purple button-up with a black tie and a black suit jacket respectively. The shiny crystal chandeliers hanging from the ceiling and the dainty white tablecloths and the five types of forks and spoons on the table that were ultimately exactly the same made the fact that the date was forced slightly more bearable. But not by much.

“Can you believe this? Virgil fumed, seconds away from chopping himself in half like a piece of Wagyu filet. “We only ever agreed on one, and now we’re on our fifth date, thanks to that dumb duke.”

“Personally I don’t entirely mind these get-togethers. In essence they’re more platonic dates than anything.”

“But he’s making us do this! Go on dates! Act like a couple, like we’re some sort of— puppets!” Virgil whisper-yelled, clutching his fists together on the dainty table cloth.

“I really don’t understand what’s the cause of your endless frustration, Virgil. Sure Remus has been a bit critical of our ‘performances,’ if you’ll call them that, but these are really just friend hangouts. We don’t even go out much anyways,” Logan reasoned, stirring around a gold-trim patterned bowl of French onion soup.

Virgil grumbled, putting his head down on the table.

Meanwhile, Remus and Deceit sat a few tables across and watched the madness transpire like you would watch a matador from the spectator stands let chaos run face-first into them, except replace the matador with someone from the stands and that’s more accurate to the kind of madness that was going on.

“I wonder what dear Virgil is so upset about?” Deceit pondered, his chin resting in his hands as he watched, not at all discreetly, the two dining.

“Oh pFF, he’s probably mad that he’s here instead of at his MCR concert,” Remus sputtered out, anxiously watching Logan and Virgil bicker senselessly a bit across from them.

Virgil, at the same time, felt himself slipping into hysteria. “This is all Remus’s fault! He’s doing this for himself! Doesn’t even care how we feel—”

“Virgil, calm down—”

“I do not need to calm down!”

A waiter walked by Deceit and Remus’s table, refilling their water glasses.

Deceit watched Logan and Virgil in what seemed like excited delight, a rather creepy sight for anyone at the nearby tables, while Remus, the obviously creepier one of the two, watched in anxious wait, bouncing his leg up and down on the softly carpeted floor.

Up and down went Remus’s leg, over and over, as his mind started to race. Would Deceit catch Remus in this lie? Would he finally found out that this whole mess was a contrived scheme in order for Remus to stealthily evade Deceit’s possible rejection? And what if Deceit did reject him once he found out? Would Remus die of grief? Would he spontaneously combust? Would he have to get a new identity and move to New Jersey?!

“Remus,” Deceit interrupted, and Remus’s head twisted back over quickly.

“Huh?”

“You seem uneasy,” Deceit said, his concern lacing his words like ribbons on gifts. “Are you quite alright?”

“Huh? Lil ol’ me? Of course!” Remus smiled lopsidedly, his leg still bouncing on the ground.

Deceit tapped Remus’s leg with his foot. “If this is any proof, you very clearly aren’t.”

Remus mounted his leg on the ground. “Just excitedly waiting in anticipation, that’s all! I can’t wait to see what will happen next with Logan and Virgil.”

Deceit squinted his eyes. “I hope you think I’m not stupid enough to believe that.”

“No, uh!!-- I don’t think you’re stupid--” Remus stammered out.

“Come on, let’s go outside for a minute, shall we?” Deceit stood up from the table, brushing off his suit jacket buttoned tightly over his yellow button-down.

Remus stood up as well, twisting the edge of his black suit jacket around his fingers.

Deceit led Remus outside, and at that point the moon had already awoken to begin the night. A dark cloak blanketed the sky as tiny snowflake stars dotted the night. A light breeze flowed through the air as Deceit and Remus walked over to a white metal bench in front of the restaurant. They both sat down as a car drove past.

“Should we have not come to spy here?” Deceit asked.

“No, no, it was a great idea,” Remus reassured, eyes fixed ahead.

Deceit frowned. “You can tell me if it wasn’t.”

Remus took in a breath, about to admit to Deceit the whole reason these spying sessions existed, aka about to do something without thinking, aka about to follow the same line of thinking he has when he does anything. “Dee--”

That is, he was going to do that, until a scream shattered the air. “DECEIT!” it cried.

The yell came from Virgil, who had madly burst through the doors and approached their bench, and Logan was not far behind.

“Oh sh*t,” Deceit cussed under his breath. “Our cover’s blown.”

Remus, meanwhile, was wondering if a bolt of lightning was about to hit him because of the awful luck he was having.

“You never had any ‘cover’ to begin with,” Virgil huffed. “We’ve known that you two were here since the beginning.”

“What?” Deceit stared confusedly. “How?”

“How? HOW?! Are you really that dumb?!?” Virgil accused, causing Deceit to gasp daintily and, of course, in great offense to Virgil’s statement. “Remus forced us to go on these dates so he could avoid asking you to go out with him! Me and Logan aren’t even together! So now you two spy on us while me and Logan were dragged along to be the reason you two could hang out!”

Deceit raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t know you wanted to be a comedian, Virgil.”

“He’s right,” Remus admitted, his head slumped towards the ground.

“Wait, really?” Deceit turned towards Remus.

“Yeah..” Remus frowned, looking up at Deceit.

“So you set up all of these dates for Logan and Virgil just so we could hang out because you were scared that I’d reject you otherwise?”

Remus nodded shamefully.

“Oh, Squid,” Deceit whimpered. “You know I never judge you for anything, right?”

Remus turned away, his head pointed back at the ground.

Deceit sorted through his words, assembling them into meaningful sentences like scattered puzzle pieces into a complete picture. “What I’m saying is, yes. I will go out with you. And…” Remus turned to Deceit. “...I’m rather honored to have been given this much of your dedication.”

Remus met Deceit’s eyes and brightened up immediately, his smile resembling those wide, cheery smiles of dribbly-drooly but still charming bulldogs.

Deceit gave a small grin back in return.

“Alright lovebirds, are we going back inside now or what? A bowl of French onion soup is waiting for me and I wanna get my money’s worth.”

“Hmph. Fine,” Deceit pouted. “Let’s go then. I personally want to try some Wagyu beef, don’t you, Remus?”

“Yeah! Say, have you seen that video where people talk about if there was a Wagyu program for humans and if they’d join it or not?” Remus stood, taking Deceit’s arm in his.

“I haven’t, please tell me more,” Deceit stood as well, him and Remus walking back inside the glassy restaurant doors.

“Alright,” Virgil started, “Now that that’s sorted, let’s get back in. It’s cold and I saw they have pasta here, and you know that I’d die for good pasta,” Virgil headed back towards the door, hands stuffed in his dress pants pockets.

“I certainly do know that,” Logan trailed behind. “What kind of pasta do they serve?”

“Get this, spaghetti carbonara.”

“That’s it, we’re ordering two plates,” Logan declared.

Virgil raised an eyebrow.

“Okay, possibly three. The third being for takeout. If they offer that option.”

“There’s my pasta nerd,” Virgil smirked.

The two of them headed back into the sparkly clean restaurant doors, no longer as a pretend couple but now as friends, and really, that was quite a relief.

-

The rest of the meal went well. Deceit and Remus were pleasantly surprised by the Wagyu (although Remus did make an offhand comment about the portion size of the steak being smaller than cow d*ck and how it probably actually was cow d*ck) and Virgil and Logan did indeed order three plates of pasta and managed to finish all three since the restaurant didn’t do takeout and because they didn’t find that out until after they got their food and they weren’t about to waste a good plate of pasta.

After the meal, instead of Deceit’s usual comment of “Let me know when Virgil and Logan go on another date together,” Deceit just smiled and said “This was fun!”

“Yeah, it was!” Remus smiled back, his teeth beaming through his pointed lips.

“So, would next Tuesday work for our next outing?” Deceit asked.

Remus nodded excitedly. “Yep!”

“Perfect. Say, how about we go to the reptile expo across town? I heard it was going to be all next week.”

“I love it! They won’t notice if we take a python or two home with us, will they?”

Deceit burst out laughing. “Oh Squid, you’re such a hoot!”

And Remus just smiled and laughed along, because now this wasn’t Logan and Virgil’s date anymore, it was their date and their date alone.

-

[pixelatedrose]

Soulbound Part Two

First | Part 2 | Next

Ao3 link

Masterpost

Word Count: 2,955

Pairings: Platonic LAMP, Prinxiety, Logicality, Background Remile

Warnings: uncensored swearing, bullying, mention of drugs and alcohol, threats, Unsympathetic Remus, Unsympathetic Deceit, implied mention of sex (wow this fic went from 1 to like 67 real fast) Please leave a comment and tell me if I missed anything that should be tagged or if you want anything tagged!

Summary:

Roman Prince and Logan Rose are soulmates. They’re platonic soulmates though. They both have the same Soul mark to prove it. But they both have one other soul mark, binding them to one other person. And when they find Patton Miles, it just so happens that they’re both his soulmate. Logan being his Soulbound Soulmate, and Roman being a platonic soulmate. But something feels missing. And it feels filled, shockingly so, when they meet a certain someone a year and a half after they found each other.

IMPORTANT NOTE!! I changed all of their last names cause I didn't like them. So. Yeah. Also sorry this seems a bit late, I got caught up with doing things and school and we had a ton of snow (where I live we never get snow) and so I was a little distracted all week. Sorry about that y'all!! But its here now, so yeah!! Hope you enjoy!!

Chapter 2

Roman woke up with a start, his wrist stinging. He looked over at his clock that read a time much to late- or early- for it to be reasonable. He rubbed his stinging skin and tried to go back to sleep. 

  This was a regular occurrence. Waking up at two am to a stinging wrist or shoulder, sometimes an ankle or forearm. Once he woke up nearly screaming as his left side felt like it was on fire.

  He didn't quite know what it was, but Roman never thought much about it. I mean, people woke up with little pricks sometimes, right? He'd probably slept on it wrong or accidentally hit his bedframe in his sleep.

  Roman lay in bed, tossing and turning as he tried to fall back asleep. He looked over to the clock once again and sighed. It was only an hour before his alarm went off.

  Not seeing the point in trying to go to sleep anymore, Roman swung his legs over the side of his bed and started getting ready for the day.

  After taking a shower and pulling in clothes, Roman's alarm rang out two seconds after he was done styling and drying his previously wet hair. He slapped it off as quick as possible, suddenly not wanting to wake anyone else up.

  Roman inched out of his room and into his brother's, flipping on the lights, much to his brother's dismay.

  "Turn the goddamn lights off…." His brother muttered through his pillow.

  Roman sighed. "Nope! C'mon Remus, it's time for you to rise and shine- or whatever it is that you do when you're awake- and get ready for the first day of school!" He walked over to the broad window and threw open the blinds, letting light filter and flow into the already lot room, the sun beams hitting Roman's twin in the face.

  "AaaAAAHH!!" His brother screamed. He sat up in bed and shielded his face. He glared at Roman after adjusting to the light. "I'm going to sell your organs on the internet you pile of horse sh-"

  "Love you too, brother! I'm gonna go make breakfast now okay bye!!" Roman zipped downstairs, not wanting to stick around to see whether his brother would act on that threat or not.

  Ten minutes later Remus came loudly down the stairs and yelled at his brother. "DID YOU GET OUT ALL THE CEREAL AND THE POPTARTS?!!?"

  Roman sighed, looking at the counter that was overflowing with four different cereals and a box of poptarts. "YEAH BRO MAN I GOTCHU!!" He yelled back.

  Remus entered the kitchen area with his heavy heeled boots and skipped over to the cereals. He poured a little of each box into a bowl and unwrapped a poptart and crumbled it on top. He went to the fridge and pulled out a carton of not milk but orange juice and poured it into the abomination that was in his bowl.

  Roman looked away and tried focusing back on the eggs he had in the pan in front of him. "I cannot believe that you actually eat that, Remus! It's revolting!" Roman bemused.

  Remus shoveled a spoonful into his mouth, staring at pointedly. "You," he sputtered through the mouthful of 'Cereal'. "My brother, have no taste." He swallowed and gestured to his bowl. "This is a masterpiece of a meal!!"

  Roman made gagging noise and slid his single solitary egg onto a piece of toast. "That's not even a meal! I daresay it would harm someone rather than anything else!"

  Remus scoffed and took another bite.

~~•~~

  Today was the first day of their sophomore year, 10th grade and they couldn't wait for it to start. Or at least, Roman was excited. Remus had made his opinion adamant; he couldn't care less if the school caught fire.

  But nonetheless, it was a day they'd all been awaiting, whether eagerly or with disdain.

  Patton had stuffed his backpack full of snacks and colorful pins as gifts for his new classmates and friends.

  Roman had excitedly roused his voice in preparation for theater and barber shop choir he was sure to audition for.

  Logan had packed up notebooks and pencils and pens, all fitting perfectly in his backpack as he awaited learning, a year ahead of his peers.

  Remus had done nothing but think up pranks and plans of destruction of freshman newbies for the start of the year. His phone pinged and he picked it up to look at it.

  A boy known around school as Deceit had discretely packed his bag and pockets full of liquors and drugs to sell to anyone who'd buy. He looked at his email and raised an eyebrow. He turned to his messages and shot a text to his partner.

  And a person of seemingly infinitesimal importance shrugged on a black and purple jacket and sighed heavily. He didn't look forward to this. What's to say it was going to be any different from last time?

  And so, life started as sophomores for each and every one of them.

~~•~~

  Virgil Sanders walked up to the front of his new high school. A place to start over… he thought.

  He pushed his way through the doors and tried to think positively.

  "Well helloooo there my good newbie of a kid!!" A voice rang out. Virgil startled back and bumped into someone behind him. How did someone get behind him so fast??

  "Ah, ah! Don't be scared my good pal!" The person behind him said, his voice was a little too reassuring, a little too happy.

  "I-I'm sorry...I'll just find my own way around…" he stammered out. He didn't want to try and be cocky and make enemies this early into the school year. And his anxiety was telling him to play it safe.

  He didn't even see the two that were harassing him before a voice trilled out, "Oh there you are, babe!!"

  Virgil felt an arm wrap around his shoulders. "Hon-ey you've got to stop running off like that! Gurl, you're gonna lose that cute purple head of yours in the crowd if your not careful!" Virgil looked up to see a boy wearing aviator shades and a leather jacket.

  "Uhm--?" 

  Virgil started before the sunglasses'd guy turned and whispered in his ear, "Just play along, babe…"

  "Right…" Virgil turned and kissed the strange man's cheek. "Sorry babe, won't happen again." He cuddled up to the man and wrapped his arms around his waist. If he was gonna play the part, might as well make it convincing.

  "That's right honey bae! Now let's get you to class!" And the two walked away hand in hand.

  As they rounded the corner, the man parted from Virgil and turned on him. "Sorry bout that honey, but gurl you were in real danger there!" He held out a hand. "The name's Remy b-t-dubs."

  Virgil shook it. "Virgil. Thanks. And sorry for the kiss." 

  Remy laughed and waved his hand at Virgil. "Oh pah-lease babe! Trust me I probably enjoyed that more than you think I did!" He winked and laughed again at Virgil's flushed face. "Now, stay outa trouble, ya hear? Cause auntie Remy ain't always gonna be around to save that cute face of yours hun. But here's my number in case you need anything!" Remy took out what looked like a business card and handed it to Virgil.

  Auntie Remy. Gossip wheel, late night counseling, party boy.

  At the bottom a number was printed. "Hey what-" but Remy was already gone.

  What just happened?

~~•~~

  Remus was pissed. He had received the text from Deceit that morning that there was fresh meat and he was so ready to spill crickets in that loser's bag! And then that stupid 12th grade dumbass senior Remy had to show up and "save the day."

  His eye caught a little freshman boy with broken glasses. He carried his books in his arms and had a smattering of freckles to accompany his bright red hair.

  Perfect! Remus thought maliciously. And crept over to sink his teeth into his next victim.

  "Hey there freckle face!" He called cheerily.

  The boy seemed startled and pointed at himself as if to confirm.

  Remus sighed. Wow this kid is dull… "Yeah you, scarecrow reject! Now Imma make this quick since I already lost one lunch income," he started, slinking around the kid. "Hand over the money you mommy gave you for food today else I'll make sure that it won't stay down."

  The redhead seemed flustered. "Wh-what? B-but, I need that money!" He subconsciously reached for his pocket.

  Bingo. Remus knew his type. Fear would get him what he wanted. He grabbed the kid by the front of his shirt, making the books tumble out of his hands. "Listen here, nerd! You gimme that money or else you're gonna be using it to mend all the bones I'll be snapping in you hand, here!" Remus held up one of the kid's spindly hands as an example, wagging it loosely in his face. His maniacal smile grew as he heard the kid whimper in fear.

  Remus put pressure on one of the kid's fingers as the freckled boy didn't move. "Tic-Toc, brainless bastard!" He snickered sadistically.

  "Fine!!" The kid yelped in fear and shoved the money at the bully. "Just leave me alone!"

  Remus pushed the kid to the ground and shoved the money in his pocket. "As you wish, orange peel!" He stepped on the kid's discarded books and walked over to where Deceit watched.

  "40-60, my snake bitch." Remus said, handing his partner 14 dollars of the 35.

  Deceit counted the money and nodded. "I'm disappointed the newbie slipped by us…" he looked off at where the purple haired boy had been a few minutes prior. "But I think he'll be back…" His amber eyes glowed a near sickly yellow. "And this time we're playing the long game."

~~•~~

  Remus had run off ahead of him so Roman entered the school's doors alone. He had wandered only a few steps inside before a blur of blue and gold barreled into him.

  "GOOD TO SEE YOU, KIDDO!!" Patton shouted, squeezing Roman in an impossibly tight hug.

  "Gah!! Good to see you too, Patton!! But," Roman gasped out, smiling. "I can't breathe, buddy."

  "Oh my GOLLY gee!!" Patton shouted, releasing Roman into open air. "I'm sorry bout that, kiddo!"

  "Really Patton, you should know your own strength by now. It'd be quite a shame if I lost my best friend before we graduated." A deep voice called, his voice laced with amusement.

  Roman softly pushed Patton aside. "Logan!!" He shouted and subsequently barreled into the tall boy, retracting after a right squeeze to just a shoulder hug. "Buddy, it's good to see you!" He laughed.

  Patton made a noise and the two boys turned to look at the shorter one. "And it's not good to see me?! I'm offended! Roman! I am your father-"

  "Not my father-"

  "And you will love me right now!"

  Roman laughed and drew Patton and Logan both into a tight hug. "Man I missed you guys!!"

  Logan gently wrapped his arms around the other two and smiled. "As did we, my friend. As did We."

~~•~~

  It was like any other start of school day. Read syllabus, play a get to know you game, repeat.

  It was really fairly normal for Roman.

  Until his third period.

  Roman knew nearly everyone in his grade, he had been the popular kid back in middle school and that had mostly transferred when he got into high school. So when roll call was being taken, it piqued his interest when a foreign voice answered a foreign name.

  "Roman Prince?"

  "You called?" Roman asked charmingly. The teacher looked at him tiredly. Roman cleared his throat. "Here!" He called a little more calmly.

  "Flora Riley?"

  "Here!"

  "Uh...Virgil Sanders?"

  Virgil Sanders? Roman thought. Maybe I just don't remember him and I'll recognize his vio-

  "Here." A quiet but firm voice answered and Roman checked behind him to see the source of the unrecognized voice. 

  A boy sat in the back of the class with his feet pressed up against the table, curling himself mostly into a ball in his chair. But even so, Roman could see purple hair peeking out from under his patchwork hoodie and stylish, iconic reverse eyeshadow applied to his face. His ripped black jeans and scuffed combat boots made it obvious that there was a new emo in school.

  Cute… Roman thought subconsciously. I mean, he was pretty cute.

  "Alright class. We're gonna play a get to know you game. Now come up and draw sticks." The teacher held out a tin full of stocks with names on them and shook it slightly, letting the wood jingle against the run. "You'll be drawing the person you'll be sitting with for the rest of the semester. You may not trade with anyone, and yeah, that sucks but so does school." The class snickered as people drew sticks. There were only enough for half the class, and the other half drew the sticks.

  Roman was not part of the group that drew sticks. So he sat idly at his seat and began to daydream about how the year would go.

  "You're Roman Prince?" A voice asked.

  Roman snapped out of his dreaming and looked up to see Virgil the Emo standing over him. Roman smirked and out a hand to his chest. "The one and only! Come to admire how pretty I am?" He asked charmingly.

  The emo snorted. "As in pretty dull? Maybe. It is a wonder of the world after all."

  Roman scoffed and pressed his other hand over his heart, as if it hurt. "I'm offended! You wound me!!" Roman held out his hand smiling. "I assume we're seating partners then! How do you do, my emo nightmare?"

  Virgil didn't take his hand, rather he just walked to the back of the class. "Come now, Prince of the Preppy, we don't know each other and honestly I don't think we ever will. We're not sitting up front."

  Roman frowned at the lack of jest in the emo's voice. He thought he and the purple haired boy were flirting wonderfully!

  Since Roman didn't seem to have any other Soul Marks, he didn't have a Soulbound Soulmate. So he freely flirted with every moving thing that breathed.

  But Roman wasn't going to give up that easily. "Hey there, plum hair! Tell me, what's it like looking so fruity?"

  Virgil snorted, and hid his face in his sleeve.

  Nooo!! Roman thought. I wanna see your cute face!!

  "I dunno...what's it like being so fruity?"

  Roman laughed and tried again to reach out his hand. "An absolute delight!"

  When Virgil did nothing but sit down at the table in the farthest back corner of the classroom, Roman deflated a little. This Virgil was cute, albeit a little annoying. I mean all he would do is snark at him! Maybe Roman had misread the situation.

  "Fine alright," Roman have up. "I'll stop talking, panic-at-the-everywhere."

  "Sweet." Though it was the answer he should have been expecting, Roman prickled.

  "So you don't want to talk to me at all?" Roman asked flatly, slightly annoyed.

  "No, not really." Virgil said, pulling out his phone.

  "Really? Like really Really?"

  "Yep." He popped the P and pointedly turned away from Roman.

  "Are you kidding me?"

  "Nope." He again popped the P.

  "You know we're going to have to sit next to each other all semester, right?"

  "Yeah…? And…?"

  "Well you have to talk to me eventually!"

  "And I'll stay here dreading when that dreaded eventually will come."

  "You cannot be serious! Come on I'm fabulous!"

  "Fabulously plastic, dumb, and shallow, if that's what you mean."

  "Shallow?!"

  "Uh, yeah?"

  "How dare-!"

  "Alright class!!" The teacher clapped their hands, stopping the impending fight that was about to break out. They started passing out papers to each of the students. "Now choose one or two, or however many you want and ask them to your partner. And yeah it sounds boring and maybe it might be if you're boring. So don't be a boring teenager."

  Roman and Virgil got the paper and looked it over. It at least Roman did. He finally picked one and asked it, knowing that trying to wait for the Emo to pay attention would be futile.

  "If you could change one thing about the world, what would it be?" Roman sighed out.

  The answer that came was almost immediate and nearly shook Roman to his core. "Soulmarks." Virgil seemed to have spat the word out. "I'd get rid of all Soulmarks."

  Roman was about to ask further about it but he heard a loud clang behind him.

  "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU SLEPT WITH SISSI LETANTA?! YOU SHIT!! YOU KNOW THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND'S LITTLE SISTER, YOU BASTARD!!!" The girl behind Roman was in an absolute rage. The boy she was talki- screaming at was pale and seemed like he'd wet set himself out of fear at any moment.

  "Whoa…yo Virgil check this ou-" Roman had once again tried to communicate with the Emo boy, but turned to see him filming the whole thing. "What are you doing…?"

  "Blackmail."

  "What?!"

  "You never know when it may come in handy."

  "You're the creepiest emo kid I've ever met."

  "And how many emos have you met exactly?"

  "Three! There was this one girl in my middle school that-"

  "Yeah okay you can shut up now."

  "Well thanks."

  The fight had only been broken up by the bell ringing. And Virgil left without saying a word to Roman.

  What a weird, creepy, cute kid… Roman thought. I think I wanna be his friend.

Again, I’m sorry this is later than I wanted it to be, and It’s not as good as I’d like it to be, but I promise I have things planned for this! Big things! Angsty things! Fluff!! I swear it’s going to be better than it is right now, I’m just a little caught up in life at the moment. Hope you liked it! And do feel free to leave a comment if you want me to tag you!! Sweet dreams!!

Taglist

@anxietea-and-insanitea

@ghostboi-bambi

@scrunchiescrunchie

[romansleftshoulderpad]

To Love and to Loathe (and to Love Once Again)

Based on This Theory I made a while back!

Ships: Logince, OG Creativity/Logic

Words: 3,906

Warnings: Remus as a minor character, Morally grey Deceit, He’s sort of important but only for the first few paragraphs, sex jokes, 

Tags: @fandermom @patchworkofstars @poisonedapples @hogwarts-my-love @opaque-puppet @omni-hamiltrash @darling-elm @jynxlovesluck

---

They were an unlikely pair, Creativity and Logic. Logic was reserved and serious, while Creativity was loud and unfiltered. They were completely different, but they were in love. Young, childish, innocent love. The kind of love that sticks with you for years and decades afterwards. A pure form of love.

After years of fond sighs and longing gazes, “accidental” hand touches and finding any excuse to be with each other, they finally got together.

The others would teasingly ‘aww’ and gag at the two as they held hands. Morality would always be there to capture the priceless blush on Logic’s face whenever Creativity teased and flirted with him.

“Hey Logitivity,” Morality had greeted one day.

“Logitivity?” Logic asked, tilting his head in confusion.

“It’s your couple name!”

“Oh,” Logic mumbled, letting go of his boyfriend’s hand to hide his blushing face. “I see.”

“It’s perfect, Morality,” Creativity laughed, holding onto Logic and pressing soft lips to his face.

But it was the soft nights in Creativity’s room that Logan had loved the most. Just the two of them lounging around in pajamas and cuddling under blankets and talking about the things they loved. Creativity would turn the ceiling into a starry night sky and wrap his arms around Logan. He could be loud and annoying, and at times inappropriate, but he was also safe and warm. And he was Logan’s.

Logan’s to love. To cherish. To worship.

He was perfect.

Logan blinked back the tears in his eyes, clearing his throat when he saw Anxiety staring. It was almost funny how they still called him that, “Anxiety.” Most of them had given up their functions for names years ago, and as he glanced up and saw Roman, he couldn’t help but laugh at how the tables had turned.

Thomas was getting older. He was changing; they all were. Creativity paced back and forth, hardly able to conjure up a single idea. “I don’t get it, Logic! It’s like- it’s like there’s two voices inside of my head and I- I can’t control them.” He dug his hands through his hair, a streak of grey snaking out between his fingers.

“We can get through this,” Logic said.

“We?”

“Yes. We,” he repeated, placing a kiss to Creativity’s cheek. “I’m going to help you.”

Creativity sighed, releasing the tension in his body and happily ragdolling into Logan’s arms. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Logic said with a small chuckle at his boyfriend’s affection as he started falling from the weight leaning on him, “but stop trying to get on top of me.”

“Oh? Would you prefer I get under you then?” Creativity asked with the sly smirk that always set Logan’s face on fire.

Logic shoved his laughing boyfriend on the floor trying to hide his red face. “You’re a rat bastard,” he said trying to look intimidating.

“I’m your rat bastard,” Creativity said, pulling Logic down to the floor with him, laughing and pulling him into a kiss.

That might’ve been the last happy memory Logan had with him. It wasn’t Creativity’s fault, but he would never be the same. The arguing in his head got worse. He could hardly act like himself anymore. Anxiety was growing stronger, becoming a stronger part of Thomas and it only made things worse.

It was like seeing two sides of him. One side was fighting with Anxiety and distrusting Deceit. He blindly agreed with anything Morality told him was good or bad. The other side of him could be cruel towards Morality and outright mocking. He and Deceit acted like best friends, and while he still never liked Anxiety, they had moments of toleration.

Logan seemed to be his only constant, but even then he was unpredictable. Hours of being locking himself up alone and isolated followed by being glued to Logic’s hip. It was exhausting to keep up with, but Logan knew it would be okay. It would just be a phase. Creativity would be back to normal soon enough. And they’d be happy again. Together as they always had been.

Everything would be the same again.

Logic should have known that things rarely go according to plan.

It must’ve been too much for him. Logan often spent days wondering if this was even something he could've prevented. Logan often wondered how he could have prevented this. Creativity had locked himself in his room, arguing and shouting with himself.

“He’s been in there for hours,” Morality said, staring at the door.

“Yes, well, I suppose he just needed some privacy,” Logic said, running his fingers over the fabric of his tie.

“Should... should we check up on him?” Anxiety asked, biting his nails. He could begin to see traces of his own eyeshadow on Logic and Morality’s faces. He swallowed down that worry; there was so much on everyone else’s plate and for once he wanted to spare them from himself.

“Ah, yes,” purred Deceit. “We should definitely go walk in on a man in the midst of his temper tantrum. Morality! Why don’t you go first and we can see if that sword of his is real.”

“Fuck off, asshole,” Anxiety muttered.

Everything went silent and none of them dared to move. Everyone turned to Logic. Tears filled to the brim of his eyes and the tension was so thick he could hardly breathe. It was a moment that would change his life- change Thomas- and even now he can still feel the ghost of tears falling down his face. He stood up, took a deep breath, and opened the door.

They had been there, sitting on the ground, staring at the other sides with fear and confusion in their eyes. Logan wasn’t sure what to focus on- them or the way Creativity's room had lost its balance.

“Creativity?” Morality had asked softly.

“Yes?” both twins responded- one in red; the other in green.

“Which one of you is Creativity?” Anxiety asked.

“I am,” they answered in unison. Their eyes locked on each other. “You’re not Creativity, I’m Creativity! STOP COPYING ME!”

“Logic,” Anxiety said through his teeth, gripping onto Logan’s arm. Logan can still feel that grip and all the panic that caused it. “Can we talk outside for a moment?”

Logic let out a sigh and followed Anxiety, closing the door behind him. Anxiety took a deep breath and Logic couldn’t help but wonder when he had reapplied his eyeshadow. “What the FUCK IS GOING ON IN THERE?” he yelled.

“You think I know?!” Logic shot back.

“YEAH, NO SHIT, SHERLOCK! THAT’S WHY I’M FUCKING ASKING!”

“Can they... re-fuse?” Morality asked. All eyes were stuck on Logic as if waiting to find the exact moment where he snaps. “They’re still... he’s still...” He took a deep breath. “I’m not giving up on him.”

“Logic.”

“I’m not giving up on him, Morality,” he said with a raised voice. “Because he wouldn’t give up on me.”

Deceit cleared his throat. “Perhaps,” he said slowly, “we should talk to them.”

Morality glanced between Logic and the door. “I can’t believe I’m saying this but-“ Deceit rolled his eyes- “he’s right.”

“Well, there’s a first time for everything,” Deceit said before disappearing behind the door.

And so was life. The other sides talked to and about the twins. The longer they stayed, the more Logan knew He was gone. He wasn’t coming back. Logan never even got to say goodbye.

“Logic,” one of the twins said- his voice so similar yet so distinctly different- and Logic’s heart jumped.

He turned, holding his fingers against the boy’s cheek. “Creativity?” he asked, searching for some hint, some semblance of the man he loved. Instead, the twin drew back, no love or even remembrance in his eyes.

“Logic, I- We- wanted to talk to you about something.”

Could they have remembered? Could they re-fuse?

“We’re not exactly fans of being Twin One and Twin Two,” Twin Two said.

Logic nodded, biting his lip.

“Right, well, the imagination is... sort of like a kingdom,” the red twin said. “So, I was, well-”

“Oh just spit it out already,” his brother berated.

He cleared this throat, throwing his hands up in a dramatic pose. “I am Prince Creativity, at your service.” Logic could see his hands shaking and his heart pounding. “Princey for short.”

“And I am the Duke of Creativity,” the other twin said with a bow.

“Ah, well, yes I suppose those are proper titles,” Logic agreed. “Thank you for coming to me with this, er, Princey.”

And now they were here. Creativity- the old Creativity- was long gone. And now Anxiety was ducking out? Quitting?! No, Logan’s eyes were stuck on Anxiety, he couldn't lose anyone else.

“Why would you do that?” Thomas asked fear and pain stuck in his eyes. Logan began to wonder if the look in Thomas’s eyes mirrored his own.

“Well it didn’t seem like I was wanted,” he said. “You all made that pretty clear anytime I showed up.”

Logan could feel the room getting to him. It was just the room- being in /any/ side’s room had effects on him. Being in Creativity’s room had never had any effects on him.

Logan wasn’t even sure if he was listening anymore when all he saw was Patton’s mouth moving but heard no words. He glanced towards Roman. Surely he, Creativity, would know what it’s like when a side disappears.

“Well, surely you knew that we were just preparing ourselves for the worst po-“ Roman looked towards Anxiety, taking in a breath. He started over. Logan almost remembered that same lack of forethought before speaking, but not with Roman. Not like this. “Okay, uh, maybe I could rephrase that,” he said, moving his arms nervously. Nervous. Roman was nervous- they all were. It was the damned room, Logan kept reminding himself as the memories came flooding in and he silently screamed ‘Anxiety, please don’t leave me, I have no one else left!’

“We’re just tensing up because we knew that something bad would- Uh-“ Anxiety looked to Logan and Thomas with exasperation and what can only be described as an “are you fucking hearing this?” face.

“Look,” Roman sputtered, “it’s just- You’re never really fun an-“

“Roman,” Thomas said, channeling his inner mom, “shut up.”

Creativity could be unfiltered, yes, with plenty of innuendos to go around, but he was never uncaring. Roman? Roman wasn’t Creativity. Not the one Logan knew.

“Look! I am the Creative Side,” he justified and Logan’s veins boiled with rage, “not the fluffy, cutesy, kind words-y side.”

Logan’s face burned with tears of grief. What happened to the poet that Logic fell in love with? The one who could create soliloquies about the stars and entire novels about the sparkle in his lover’s eye. Why did he need to go so soon and so unfairly leaving only mediocre replacements in his place?!

Logan blinked back his tears, trying to ground himself. He ignored the knowing look in Patton’s eyes. He was gone. It was all over. “One would think,” he spit, his words like venom as his brain filled with words and poems that could never be replaced, “that the Creative side would be able to come up with a nicer way to talk to others.”

“You’d think the smart side would know when to mind his own business,” Roman spat back with just as much venom.

“Okay, I’m glad you all decided to visit,” Anxiety said, “but if I wanted to stand around being insulted, I would have shown up in person like I usually do.”

Logan took one last look at Roman. And he knew He was gone.

But they were fine now. All of them out of Anxiety’s- Virgil’s- room. He had told them his name. And as they went back to the mindscape, Logan couldn’t help but let his mind continue to play it all on loop.

“Anxi- Virgil,” he called, passing by the other. “Virgil, I, well, I think it was very brave of you to tell us your name.”

“You and I both know what names mean to sides,” Virgil said with a cocky smirk but pity in his eyes.

“Don’t I know it,” he agreed. His eyes passed over Roman’s door- a different room than the one he had spent so much time in. Just as Creativity had, the room split and divided. The two halves lie nowhere near each other nowadays.

“Hey, Logan, are you okay?” he asked quietly. “You and Roman seemed... tenser than usual.”

Logan straightened his spine, doing whatever he could to avoid eye contact. “Well, your room has its... consequences on us all and I am no exception.”

“You miss him. L, we all do, but at some point, you have to-”

“Well, look at the time I must get going now.”

“Logan,” Virgil said. “I’m here for you. You two had something special, I get that. Just... you can talk to me.”

Logan let out a deep breath, turning away as the tears dripped from his eyes. “Goodbye, Virgil.”

“Later, L.”

Logan had tried to sleep that night. He had tried so hard to stop his brain from remembering and nostaligizing each wonderful moment that had since been drowned in pain and agony. It killed him, each and every time he saw his lost love’s smile in Roman’s eyes or his crude jokes from Remus’s voice, it killed him even more.

What is the purpose of happiness if find memories shall cause nothing but hurt in the end? For what purpose should one be open and loving if only for the receiver of that love to vanish and hurt them? Is it truly better to love and lose than to never love at all? Or is such a phrase merely invented by fools trying to console their broken but beating hearts after everything with value is gone forever?

Does the price of a lifetime of weariness and solitude truly match a few fleeting moments of love? With such a tax on one’s heart is there ever any real meaning to loving at all or is it perhaps easier to reject such feelings of positivity in order to free yourself is the attachments of loss and heartbreak? With no reason for happiness, there is certainly an equal promise of no chance for sadness.

Logan stared at the glowing, glittering sky that Creativity had painted on his ceiling. He swallowed the lump in his throat and denied the tears begging for refuge from his eyes. From that moment, Logic promised himself to never feel again nor reflect on a time when feeling was an option. He had to move forward, for Thomas’s sake and his own.

“Good morning, good morning,” Roman sang, humming the rest of the song to himself.

“Well, it’s certainly morning,” Logan said, pouring himself a cup of coffee. “I believe that’s all I can agree with you on.”

“Oh don’t be so bitter! It’s a glorious day outside!”

“You can keep adding positive adjectives, but I won’t be able to agree with you on any of them.”

“What’s got you all down in the dumps?” Roman asked with a frown.

Logan took a sip of coffee, keeping his eyes down towards the cup as to avoid breaking down. He couldn’t afford any negative emotions. He couldn’t afford any emotions. “Forgive me if I’m not a beacon of joy today, I didn’t sleep well last night.”

“Nightmares?” he asked.

“Something like that.”

They finished their meals in silence. As time went on, most of their alone time was silent. And then it turned to bickering. And then fighting. On and on and on until Roman had turned from someone Logan almost loved to someone he loathed.

They had been mid-argument. Of course, they were. They always were. “Guys, why can’t we just get along?” Patton pleaded.

“We never had any problems getting along when Creativity was here,” Logan said under his breath.

“He’s gone, Logan!” Roman shouted, tears in his eyes. “I’m Creativity now! But I’m never enough for you, am I? Look, I’m really fucking sorry about your boyfriend, but it’s been years and you need to let it go!” The room went completely silent, save for Roman breaking down in tears.

“Princey,” Virgil said, reading out to hug him.

“Don’t touch me!” he yelled as he ran off, undoubtedly to his room.

“I-“ Logan started but quickly found himself in Virgil’s shadow as Anxiety towered over him.

“You have four hours to fix this or I’m putting that stupid tie of yours through the paper shredder.”

Logan was completely alone.

“Logic?” Princey asked. “Why don’t we have names?”

“Names? What do you mean?”

“I mean like names like people have,” he said. “I- I want to be called Roman.”

“Roman,” Logic repeated, the word sounding strange and foreign on his tongue. “Duke and I have spoken about this a lot,” Roman continued. “And he wishes to be called Remus.”

“Remus,” he repeated. “Roman and Remus.” He nodded as if in approval. “I shall alert the other sides and spread this news to them.”

“Thank you, Logic,” he said with a smile. “But, before you go, have you ever thought of having a name?”

Logic completely stopped in his tracks. He felt like a failing computer or a calculator trying to divide by zero. “I’m sorry?”

“A name,” Roman repeated. “Have you ever thought of having one? Surely you represent more than just Logic. Wouldn’t a name be the perfect way to express that?”

Logic stopped for a moment. Was Creativi- Prince- Roman right?

“You don’t have to,” Roman said in a rush. “But, uh, if you’re looking for a suggestion, I think that ‘Logan’ suits you quite nicely.” The prince smiled and grabbed Logan’s hand, squeezing it for a quick moment before letting it return to Logic’s side.

Logic- Logan- stood there as Roman skipped away, his hand felt warm like a thousand gentle kisses and a million sleepy hugs. He felt like love. He felt like Creativity.

“Roman?” Logan asked as he knocked on the door. He could hear choked sobs from the inside but when he tried to open the door, he found that it was locked. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, falling to the ground and sitting with his back against the door. “I- I shouldn’t be so hung up on- ...everything. It’s not fair to you. It’s not fair to Remus. It’s not fair... to him.”

There was silence at the door. The crying had stopped, but Logan didn’t even know if he was doing anything right. He just had to pour his heart out. “You named me, which is kind of funny, isn’t it? A name. Such a silly thing for a side to have.” The door opened and Logan found himself lying on the ground with Roman looking down angrily at him with red eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

“I’m not Him, Logan,” he said through gritted teeth.

“I suppose you don’t remember,” Logan replied sadly. “But it was You. You told me you wanted to be called Roman. At the time I couldn’t wrap my head around it. But now, it’s so perfect. So fitting. A regal name for the most regal side.”

“You’re being delirious,” Roman said, but a smile shown on his face.

“You remember,” Logan said joyously. He laughed and pulled Roman into a clumsy hug with them both on the floor with Roman laying on top as Logan played with stray strands of his hair. “I’m so glad that you remember.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Roman said.

“I’m- I’m so happy, I- I could kiss you!”

Both boys stayed there, stuck in time as if being painted for a portrait, their foreheads pressed together as their breath ghosted over each other’s mouths. Roman was the first to pull away. His smile was contagious and Logan couldn’t help but laugh.

“Go to your room, Logan,” Roman said with a chuckle. “You’re being delirious.”

They had gotten better as time passed. Maybe not always friends, but certainly not enemies. They were able to form alliances when necessary, even if with half-teasing insults.

“You know, you guys might not think so,” Thomas said, “but you two make a really good team.”

Roman and Logan looked at each other in complete silence. And Roman smiled. A warm, genuine smile that looked so much like Creativity while also being so, so beautifully and uniquely Roman. Logan couldn’t help the tiny but subtle turn of his lips. Roman was contagious.

And time went on. Thomas grew. They grew. Through challenges, deception, and Remus, change was not only inevitable but hopeful as well.

It was the soft nights in Roman’s room that Logan grew to love the most. They would plan videos or organize Thomas’s schedule or even just talk about things like Shakespeare or poetry or music. They’d listen to Pixar music because Roman claims that he always does his best work listening to anything by Thomas Newman.

They had been working carefully when a familiar song played over the speakers and Roman immediately turned it up. He held out a hand for Logan to take. “What are you doing?” Logan asked, fingers curiously ghosting over Roman’s.

“C’mon! It’s true cute love story song from Up!” Roman said as if that were an explanation. “I want you to dance with me.”

“I- I don’t know how to dance.”

“That’s okay,” the prince said as he pulled Logan to his feet. “I’ll teach you.”

Their fingers interlocked as Roman guided Logan’s freehand to his shoulder and rested his hand on Logan’s waist. “A little closer,” he whispered, snaking his hand around to the small of Logan’s back. He counted softly as they waltzed around the room, carefully trying to step over pens and notebooks and everything else they had discarded simply to dance.

Logan adored the feeling of Roman’s hand in his. Of Roman’s hand on him. He adored the feeling of Roman’s gentle voice whispered against his ear and he loved how Roman made his heart go wild.

The song lasted so much longer than Logan remembered, yet still never long enough.

When the song ended, they never got back to work. They kept dancing and then laughing and singing and goofing off. “We should have a sleepover!” Roman announced excitedly. His eyes sparkled like the ocean and he spoke with all the energy of an excited puppy. Logan was in love.

“I’d love that,” Logan said.

And there they were, wearing pajamas and staring at a projection of the night sky that ran across Roman’s ceiling. Their hearts raced with adrenaline and everything felt right with the world.

“This is nice,” Roman said quietly, taking Logan’s hand and rubbing his thumb along the knuckles.

“Yeah,” Logan agreed quietly, blushing as he squeezed Roman’s hand. When he turned his head, he found himself nose to nose with Roman. “It really is.”

Logan’s heart raced as the prince moved closer. Was Roman going to kiss him? Did he want Roman to kiss him?! Did he actually love Roman or was he still trying to replace what he lost?

But Roman kissed his cheek and pulled him into a tight embrace as Logan hid his blushing face in the prince’s collarbone. For a brief moment, under the shining starlight, everything seemed perfect with the world. Everything was okay.

And it was love.

[x-nerdingss-x]

Guilty as Charged - Intrulogical

A one shot that isn’t angsty? Huh, turns out I am capable of writing some form of fluff/crack after all. 

Intrulogical is good shit alright?

Blurb: Upon hearing a secret relationship between Logan and Remus, the others wanted to unravel the truth in a courtroom. 

Okay no seriously: Here are some trigger warnings in case any of you need them. - Swearing - Remus, just, Remus - Sexual name calling - Courtroom scenario - Mentions of murder/suspected murder - Pet names

(You can also read this on ao3 too). 

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22:00 (PM). Sunday, 27th September, 2020. Courtroom (1).

Roman settled himself on the highest point of the room, the judge’s chair towering over the rest of the valley of seat benches in front of him. A weight scale was displayed in front of the judge’s seat, with the witness stands nicely tucked beside the judge’s space. The room had its same cream and brown structure, the dark wood fitting nicely with the formality of the scene. His red sash was pulled over his white robes, gripping onto the gavel he broke a year before.

Janus seemed smug in his side of the courtroom, chilling near the prosecutor’s benches of the scape. His partner in juristical crime, Patton, stood in his side of the room. Adjusting the silk white tie that laid on his dress shirt, he glanced curiously at the prosecutor. His own black suit fitted nicely with the yellow he adored, as well as the bowtie and bowler hat that he wore as his signature style.

Patton gave the other a small grin, a hint of mischief evident in his giddy behaviour. Wearing his own blue, white and cream suit for the event, the preppy side brushed the specks of dust off his outfit and gave a small, knowingly nod to Janus. The prosecutor of the trial nodded back to his partner, his own smirk curling onto his snake-sided face. Janus later scoped around the room for the little emo he again appointed as the jury. Given that it was early night, the tired side sprawled across the few chairs of the gallery, his hand resting over the table top and his leg hanging for room space. Roman slammed his gavel loudly near Virgil’s direction, and Janus stifled a laugh when a thud was heard nearby.

Virgil climbed off the floor to sit on his jury seat properly, huffing as he hunched over his figure. His eyes were darker than usual, his low energy reflecting his tired mood. The patched purple tie loosely hung from his purple button up shirt, and his black hoodie had its familiar, warm weight on his shoulders. It was a Sunday night, and the others thought it was a perfect time to introduce the new agenda of the week, starting fresh before the new Monday.

Logan (compared to the others) looked pissed. The last place he wanted to spend his night was in a courtroom to entertain the other sides. He was abruptly summoned from the warmth of his bed into a bright blinding room. Still in his fluffy, stark white unicorn onesie and blue flannel pyjamas, he hastily stood up in order to properly change into his daily attire. Clearly, his day has not been finished yet. With his black polo shirt and blue striped tie, he also summoned a black cardigan to keep the nightly chill off his shoulders. Logan heard shuffling noises around him, and he assumed everyone else was getting ready for the trial to commence.

Speaking of trial - What the heck is this trial meant to be? Why is it held at a late time? On a Sunday no less. Logan assumed he was to receive these answers to the questions swimming in his head throughout the fiasco the others called a court scenario. He took a quick wander around the room and noticed he sat in the defendant’s seat rather than in the back of the room where he was last time in the public gallery. At least he had a more significant role than the last courtroom event, but himself sitting in the defendant’s seat and not as a lawyer like the snake-father pair did confuse him. Was he in trouble for something? Or was it the group’s dramatics to engage themselves into a topic the answer to his questions?

Nevertheless, Logan continued observing and noticed there was a lack of Thomas in this room, so he safely deduced that the sides weren’t working with another late-night moral dilemma. He also spotted a lack of green that would often appear in the same room as the others. Perhaps, he was asleep and kept away from the mess the others would engage themselves into - although, knowing the other side’s curious and unpredictable behaviour paired together, it would have been tricky to hide away from him.

Logan’s thoughts trailed to the whereabouts of Remus instead of the sounds in front of him, his pondering kept short when he heard the gavel slamming for attention. He vaguely heard Roman’s shouts and almost missed the others sitting in their seats. Logan decided to pay attention to the situation instead. At least he can answer his own questions of Remus’ whereabouts later when he sees him again after the situation, whereas it would be more difficult to gather answers for his questions about the courtroom if he missed the trial.

“Alright ladies,” Roman said, beginning the court case. “Are we all ready to discuss the charges?”

“Yes, your honour,” both Patton and Janus said in unison. Virgil rolled his eyes as his response, and pulled his hood over his eyes.

Clearing his throat, Roman opened the conviction book and began reciting the lines from the last court trial.

“The state of… Logic Sanders v. uhm…” the judge began trailing off, staring at the imaginary lines. Patton tilted his head at Roman’s confusion, whereas Janus sighed as a response.

“Logan ‘Logic’ Sanders v. Mindspace, Roman.”

Roman perked his attention at the snake, whispering a quick thank you before clearing his throat again to restart his lines.

“Apologies, everyone,” He said, before speaking again. “The state of Logan ‘Logic’ Sanders v. Mindspace in the name and by the authority of the state of the Mindspace,” Then picking up his gavel in the process, he pointed the mallet towards the stylish lawyer. “Janus ‘Deceit' Sanders, prosecuting for the state of the mindspace, under oath information makes the trial for Logic Sanders.”

Roman saw the wording, and grinned at the page he was to say aloud. “Count one…” He said. “Did conspire suspectful activities  with Remus Sanders, the Duke of Creativity, without mentioning it to other sides who reside in the mindscape.”

Logan quirked an eyebrow at the mention of Remus. “Count two, is convicted of creating and performing numerous chemical concoctions that are, as of, dangerous to handle and human dissection without a license, whilst experimenting said ideas on an idiot the judge then refers to as a 'brother’.”

Listing off the convictions, Virgil laid his head on the jury bench to rest before the lawyers could provide their opening statements. Logan wanted to do the same as the jury, especially as the false claims of his activities are listed throughout before the case could properly commence. He took note of how most of these activities, if not all, involve Remus in some way. It’s not as if they figured something out, right? Logan handles the braincell after all.

Well, so he thought.

“And count 5. Is engaged in an illegal secret relationship with Remus Sanders, the Duke of Creativity,” Roman huffed, finishing his lines. “Remus should be glad I read his name in such formality and not as ‘Stinky Trash Bastard’.”

Logan’s attention piqued as he heard the last conviction, conscious to not give any facial expressions away for the courtroom. The others may own a brain cell between them after all, although, in Logan’s situation, it is not the best thing to appreciate. Lifting himself off the seat to call on their bullshit, Logan fell back almost instantly as if he was restrained. Noticing the chains linked from his wrists to the seat, he quietly growled as he tugged on his arms.

“What is the meaning of this, by chance?” He asked the others who stared back at him.

Roman opened his mouth to repeat the charges, for Janus to interrupt him instead. “Did you seriously forget that you were charged for suspectful murders with Remus?”

“Are you… for sweet Newton…” He muttered under his breath. “I did not try to kill anybody, I can promise the court that.”

“Sorry Logan, but that’s for the jury to decide,” Virgil mumbled, resting his head down away from the bright lighting of the room. Logan grumbled from his seat, crossing his arms and leaning back on his seat. Yawning, Logan rested his head back as he listened through the court procedures. Janus’ work for an accurate scenario, he was sure. There was no doubt Roman wanted to join him, with his theatrics for drama. Patton was most likely involved for a majority vote. Virgil however? He wasn’t too sure as to why he’s in the room, more preferring sleep than anything.

He heard the judge banging his gavel again to wake Virgil from his attempts of slumber, and he felt someone shaking his arm awake. Opening one eye to spot a concerned Patton, he shrugged his lawyer away and went back to closing his eyes, concentrating on the sounds instead.

“Logan ‘Logic’ Sanders, how do you plead?”

“Not guilty, obviously,” He said. “However, I do have a question for the judge.”

With the silence in the room, Logan took this as his opportunity to speak. “Hypothetically, for some odd reason I was to be found ‘guilty’ for any of these charges, what is my sentence?”

Patton leaned against the edge of his side of the bench, fiddling with the tie tucked into his vest. “Full fairness, we were aiming to get you to cough out what you were hiding with Remus and give you a minor sentence. We would agree on the sentence, right guys?”

Logan began tapping his foot on the tiled floor, his impatience slowly growing. “But what is that minor sentence you were thinking of? A rough idea, Patton.”

Everyone hummed at the question, thinking of an idea. It wasn’t till Roman had an idea did he share with the court.

“If you are found guilty on any of these charges, we take your crofters away for a month for not telling us and uh...”

“A group discussion about opening up to others when we figure out why you were so secretive to us, and work towards building trust,” Patton said, silently congratulating himself on his idea.

They’re going to fucking what?

Not the crofters. Not the trust exercises.

“You are not touching my crofters, nor am I going to participate in a ‘trust bonding exercise’”.

“Logan, that is for the Judge to decide after your trial. Gosh, I thought you were meant to be the smart one,” Janus said, waving away Logan’s protest. “Now, can the judge continue this trial? I do like continuing my 8 hour sleep schedule.”

“Alright,” Roman puffed out his chest, opening a different book to read from. “Prosecutor, your opening statement…”

-*-

The trial was running along smoothly as the lawyers gave their statements, and Logan decided to at least entertain the idiots for a while. If he cooperates, the better chance he has to both escape charges and sleep in his lovely cushioned bed with Remus. It wasn't as if he were not guilty with all of them, but he wasn’t going to tell the others which charge it was. Although, he wouldn’t say their relationship was illegal either, per se.

“Prosecutor, call your first witness to the stand,” Roman said.

Janus nodded, summoning Logan into the witness bench. He noticed the chains around his legs, meaning he couldn’t teleport anywhere beyond the courtroom, but he appreciated the fact that his wrists were free. Janus waltzed over to the other stand, to begin questioning his first ‘witness’. First? Does this mean there are other witnesses? Would that mean the other witness is Remus? Logan doubted that Remus would be kept away from the courtroom in the first place due to his nature, but the fact that he was included in the charges meant the others would interegotate him too.

Oh gosh, Remus doesn’t even know what a filter means.

Logan silently wished for Remus to remember the fact that it was a shared secret, and therefore his partner can keep the unharmed crofters.

“Witness, state your name, age and role as a side.”

Logan cleared his throat. He should at least follow along to their shenanigans if it meant he gets out quicker and freely. “Logan Sanders. I am 31 years old, and represent Thomas’ Logic.”

As he finished his sentence, a book appeared beside him as Janus took the initiative to recite the vow for the court. With everyone’s hand on the book (except for Virgil, who Logan could assume was soundlessly asleep), the book disappeared and the question could finally begin.

“Let’s cut to the chase, shall we?” Janus asked.

Logan stared back at Janus, giving the other a small smirk. “Objection, that would be leading the witness.”

“Well objection, the witness does not object.”

Roman fiddled with his red sash for a moment before noticing the pair. Picking his gavel up, he gestured to the two men. “Sustained. Janus, watch yourself with your blunt honesty. Logan, do your job as a witness.”

Apologising to the judge, Janus sighed as he posed straighter in his stand. “Very well, we shall do this the long way.”

“We shall, yes,” Logan spoke back. Sneering at the logical side, Janus adjusted his bowtie and began his work.

“Alright, if you insist,” He began. “I’ll like to remind the court of the date of which the case commences. It should be Sunday, 13th of September, 2020, and this date is when participants of this room recognise some signs of a… relationship, between the pair.”

Janus cruised around from the stand towards Logan, resting his arm on the desk. “How would you classify your bond with Remus?”

“I would say it is a close platonic relationship between us.”

Smirking, Janus clicked his tongue at the statement. “So close, would you say you do activities together that you, or Remus, wouldn’t do with the other sides?”

“Provide examples to the court, Janus, and I’ll decide on that question,” Logan leaned over, staring at the snake. No way would there be any evidence that would suggest their relationship together, or anything else like doing chemistry experiments together, or dissection as a pair. The homicide case however, was questionable, since Logan didn’t remember killing anyone - unless they assume he was suspected to contribute into some homicide cases; again, questionable. What was the 4th conviction again? Now he thought about it, Logan should’ve paid more attention to the charges Roman was reading aloud to everyone.

Nearby an empty space in the courtroom, Janus clapped his hands together to summon a table. Logan felt the blood drain from his face as he saw the table. An assortment of items laid on the desk, from fingerprinted evidence to even photos with him and Remus together. A few objects were on the table too, which included small bags of jewellery and the coats the pair wear whenever they do their science experiments. How is Logan getting away with any of this both smoothly and quickly?

Janus adjusted his yellow gloves and picked up a small ring from the table. The glint of gold shined from the reflection of the lighting, and Logan instinctively looked over his left hand to realise there was something missing. His glance was quick, but both Janus and Patton caught his stare to confirm that it was his own ring. Logan stood up to walk over to the table himself and snatch his ring from Janus’ grip, only to remember he was restrained to the ground.

“So eager Logan… But do tell the court what this ring means to you.”

“Janus, I request that you give it back to me as it is my belongings.”

“But you have stated earlier that you would discuss the activities you do with Remus to the court once I provide examples, and this is your first only example. The rest is for Patton to decide when he interrogates you next,” Janus leaned onto the bench while inspecting his gloves, turning around to wink at the defence attorney awaiting for his go. Patton glanced to the side, covering his hand over his mouth to suppress his giggling. Janus patiently waited for Logan to dig himself out the figurative hole he just dug himself in, smirking as the opportunity for the real truth seemed bright.

“For your information, the ring has no relevance to this case, and no relevance to the previous statement you provided to the court about some weird, nonsensical ‘symptoms’ of me having feelings,” He retorted, sitting gayly-straight on his seat. "Get lawyered."

“But here’s the thing Logan, it does, in fact have relevance,” Janus said, grabbing a snapped photo earlier of the ring. “In this ring is engraved a date. Assuming this ring is yours due to your reaction earlier of checking if you have the ring, do you want to share the connection of a suspected bond between you and this ring?”

Logan gulped, shifting away slightly as Janus held up a photo for the judge to see. He knew what the ring was. Although the ring was gold, there were speckles of dark blue sapphires and emeralds that were entwined together, with detailed swirls danced around the ring. Inside the ring had a date. 13.9.20. That was the day him and Remus celebrated their 3 year marriage anniversary.

“It’s not as if you provided any details about these signs of a speculated relationship,” Logan said. “What are these figurative ‘connected strings’ between our friendship and the signs? Obviously a ring could be a part of the friendship, but do you care about sharing anything else to the court?”

Janus strolled back to the table and picked up another object from the layers of evidence he could show Logan. While gathering a few photos to display, he also held a stained cooking apron in his arms both respectively coloured blue and green. The few photos were of the pair baking or cooking dishes (captured from a corner due to Patton’s photography skills). Looking over at the evidence table, Logan’s eyes trailed across to another empty spot of the courtroom, where Patton’s side was. The logical side only realised then, that both sides had enough evidence to prove their points.

He hopes that Patton’s defending skills were better than Janus’ prosecuting.

“I’m pretty sure besties don’t wear cooking aprons together and make things. Not even Virgil and I cook together like you guys and I consider ourselves good friends,” Roman quipped as he saw the evidence.

“Well, what do you think of this new evidence, jury?” Patton asked, spinning around to face Virgil. Unfortunately for them, Virgil was softly snoring from his comfortable position. Roman grabbed his gavel again, slamming it close to the edge of the table to Virgil’s direction. The anxious side perked up from the sound, turning his gaze towards the judge before huffing. He lifted his head back, rubbing the sleep away from his eyes.

“Alright, what did we find from Logan? Brief recap please,” Virgil asked.

“We found out that Logan’s bromance can be proven as a romance,” Roman said.

“How?”

“Cooking aprons,” Patton clapped. “Oh Jannie, didn’t you also find their cookbook? You got real good recipes there Logan.”

Logan’s attention reverted back to the black-tux wearing lawyer in front of him. “Jannie?”

“We’re meant to make fun of you, you know,” Janus sneered, throwing the cooking aprons at the judge. “Anyways, I can also supply a fully documented report conducted by the side who feels… well, feelings of what was being observed during that day and now, in this very courtroom,” Janus held the case file in his hands, blowing a quick kiss to Patton’s direction. The other closed his hand as if he caught it, holding his hand to his chest while smiling. Virgil grimaced at their loving affection, whereas Roman waved the lawyer’s shenanigans away. He opened the file, finding many pages of notes instead of the expected few words Patton would’ve written.

“This is about the both of them, right?” Roman asked himself rather than Patton.

“No, your honour,” Patton heard the judge. “That is of Remus alone.”

Roman chuckled at the notes he read as Logan sunk on his seat, his confidence disappearing. His defence attorney created a case file for his prosecutor. How would Patton defend his own words? How would Patton defend? Yes, Logan felt himself getting screwed over by the two lawyers. Until, that was, an idea popped in his head.

“Hold it,” Logan stood up, pointing a finger to the prosecutor. “I thought we were discussing about me, your witness, if you remember. How would that contribute to my case?”

“I’m so glad you asked Logan,” Patton said, getting up from his seat to join Janus. “Jannie and I waited for this moment.”

Virgil, Roman and Logan looked at the both of them, each wearing their own puzzled expression.

“What moment?”

Janus stepped aside, bowing to Patton to guide him to the stand like a gentleman. “I’m afraid that’s for my clever pumpkin to tell you,” He said before strolling off to his own seat.

“Thank you Jannie,” Patton summoned his own evidence table, with more of Remus’ belongings rather than Logan’s. Still a concern for the witness, who wanted to walk away from the case with a ‘not guilty’ verdict. Preparing himself, Patton waltzed towards Logan with a grin on his face, his bunny teeth coaxed with a glint of mischief. “So do you happen to remember… the specific details… of what both you and Remus did that day… on the 13th of September?”

“In fact I do, Patton,” Logan said, adjusting his glasses. “Both he and I cooked dinner together since the rest of you were out from 5:30 PM to 8 PM, and watched a documentary to accompany each other since neither of us were busy and wanted to relax because we're good friends.” He technically  wasn’t wrong, so why did Patton look as if Christmas came early? He held up a photo album for the court, flipping through the pages with the couple together.

“This is found in Remus’ room, and evidence of his handwriting on a separated written page on the evidence table confirms that it is his handwriting and even pen ink.” He smiled brightly, trying to find the specific page in question. “There was a page of the both of you together that describes his feelings perfectly with the book I gave to judge Roman, with Remus talking a lot about your… marriage anniversary.”

Although Roman gasped for dramatic effect, Logan’s shock was shadowed from under him. His case will be blown if Patton found the page. Logan knew what he had to do, but he had to be discreet so he wouldn’t be caught. Inspecting his uncuffed hands, he rolled his wrists before flicking his fingers, making an object move from across the room. The object fell from the table and clattered on the ground, and Logan took his chance to eradicate the evidence in the photobook from where he sat. A temporary disappearing 'spell', but it would last long enough for the case. Patton looked away from the clatter to return to the photo album, frowning as his evidence had disappeared.

And a score for Logic.

Janus noticed the smug expression on Logan and the confused face on his partner. Even from a distance, he saw the lacking bulk of pages that would describe their ‘anniversary’ date, and slammed his hands on the table. It could only mean one thing, and he pointed to the witness.

“Objection,” He shouted. “Logan tampered with the evidence when the object coincidentally clattered on the ground.”

“Overruled. Unless you can prove the coincidence, then it will be dismissed,” Roman yawned. “Patton, I’m afraid your time with the witness would be over soon if you cannot gather any other sustainable evidence.”

“Oh,” Patton said, replacing his frown with a cherry grin. “No worries, my question would be finished if that were the case.”

Roman slammed his gavel down to announce the end of the questioning, and both the lawyers sat in their designated seats. Logan was teleported back to his defendants’ spot, sighing when the cold metallic shackles were connected to his wrists once again. He looked aside to Patton, and furrowed at the lawyer.

“Patton, who are you exactly in my case? I doubt you’re my defence attorney.”

Sitting down and sliding towards Logan, Patton adjusted his jacket and summoned some cookies for a quick bite. “That’s the thing, I’m not.”

“What?”

Gulping down the cookie, he hummed at the sugary chocolate chip before turning to Logan. “Both Janus and I collaborated on the case together. He would just be the leading prosecutor whereas I’m more on the side-lines waiting for your undying confession,” he explained to Logan. Before Logan could object how it was an unfair trial and therefore should be disbanded completely, Roman slammed the gavel to call for silence and prepared for everyone’s attention.

“I call for the second witness to the stand.”

Janus nodded, flinging his wrist to open the doors automatically, revealing the second witness. Seemingly in his green and black striped pyjamas, Logan assumed that one of the others forced his husband to wear some form of clothing before entering the courtroom as boxers may not have been enough. He trotted to the witness stand, also in shackles (considering the convictions were about him too). Remus yawned and glared daggers to the others that dragged him here, and took his heating (Logan) away during his peaceful slumber. Logan internally prayed that Remus wouldn’t do anything stupid during his testimony and questioning, and that the neither of them would contribute to the endless trust bond exercises if the either of them were caught guilty.

Remus seemed to not notice Logan at first, expecting his husband to wear his unicorn onesie. Landing his eyes onto Logan however in the accused's bench, a grin broke in his face and waved to his lover.

“Hey Honeybun, how’s it going?” He shouted, wanting to jump over the witness stand and cling himself into a bear hug before falling down from his seat, the shackles bonded to the floor. Nobody reacted at Remus’ fall, and each instead had their own form of surprise.

Roman saw Remus and thought that his brother could never act like an excited dog, at 11:23 PM no less.

Virgil was jolted awake from the statement, and stared at Remus in shock. By that, he had decided the verdict.

Patton was internally screaming in glee. Their plan had worked.

Janus was horrified, with his mouth open at the words that came out of Remus’ mouth.

And Logan?

Pale with rage in his eyes.

He did whatever he could to divert the case for almost an hour and a half, only for his idiot of a husband to blow it in no less than one sentence. Maybe… just maybe, he would be found guilty on all charges after all, including an attempt of homicide. Logan wished his crofters goodbye when he heard the lawyers fall from their surprise to their laughing cheers, celebrating with a quick kiss shared between them.

Janus spun around after Patton kissed him, smiling with a dopey expression before glaring at Remus. “Hold it for a second,” He said. “How the fuck-”

“Language.” Patton chided in.

“Apologies Patton. Where the fuck did you learn pet names from? I sure as heck never taught you any.”

Remus leaned over in his witness stand, wanting to be close to his best friend as much as possible (whilst being restrained).

“Did you just forget I’m also Creativity, dumbass?” He sighed, looking up to his brother on the judge’s seat. “Do repeat my title for me, ‘oh mighty judge of dick sizes.’”

Roman grumbled, crossing his arms while leaning back on his seat. “Stinky Trash Bastard?”

“No you bitch, the other thing.”

“Remus Sanders, the Duke of Creativity?”

“Ha, there’s your evidence from your ridiculous question Anus. Get lawyered.”

Logan sighed, banging his head on the table before grumbling curses under his breath. Virgil swung his legs on the table by that point, now awake more than ever since Remus stepped in the courtroom. This is what he signed up for. The drama - and he wanted to see it personally.

“Don’t worry sweetie,” Remus noticed Logan’s upset mood. “I’ll steal more crofters for you later once the trial ends and we’ll hide it in the secret stash.”

"And there goes the 4th conviction..." Roman muttered. "Count 4; thievery."

At least he remembers what I like, compared to who I love.

“Remus, you do remember the two sentences carried for this case, right?”

Getting himself comfortable on his seat, Remus tilted his head. “I mean, I know ‘the quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog’, Star-fly, and something about crofters?”

“No Remus, we have to explain everything, including our feelings.”

Remus’ eyes widened at the words, hissing. “Aw Shit. You’re not gonna do that to us, right guys?”

“I dunno Remus,” Roman said, spinning his gavel. “That is the sentence if you are found guilty on one charge, and so far you’re going to be found guilty on two and a half charges?”

“Two and a half?” The partners said in unison.

Virgil smirked, pointing to Logan. “Do you see the murder in Logan’s eyes when you said that, Remus? I wouldn’t be surprised if you’re sleeping on the couch tonight.”

Remus cursed under his breath again, whining to the emo. “But he’s my heater. Do you know how cold it is when you’re in bed alone?”

Patton squealed quietly, covering his mouth. “Oh my gosh they sleep together. You’re both so adorable, oh my god look at you Logan - all grown up and living with your life partner- hey wait a second.” He stopped talking, looking between the both of them.

“If you're both married like the photo album said, then why did you never invited us to your wedding?”

“Hey yeah - Where are your wedding papers if you’re both married?” Janus asked. Logan hummed while processing the memory of the papers, shrugging as a response.

“I remember signing mine, and I was actually fairly surprised when the last count was announced,” Logan quipped to himself, sighing when he may of realised something. “Remus, what did you do to your papers?”

“What papers? The wedding papers?”

“No Remus, we were talking about your funeral arrangements- Yes you’re marriage papers you idiot.” Virgil rolled his eyes.

Remus tapped his chin, furrowing in thought before letting out a small sound in realisation.

“Oh. Okay Logan, believe me when I say I did sign the papers.”

“Mhm, do go on defending yourself in a courtroom,” Logan said while shaking his head. He knew where this was going.

“But I may or may not… ate-our-papers-a-few-weeks-ago-with-the-new-deodorant-stick-you-gave-me?”

“You fucking WHAT?”

Virgil snickered at the couple as they began bickering, looking over to Roman and waved to him for attention. “Your honour, I came up with a verdict.”

Roman leaned over to Virgil’s side, hammering for the others to quiet down before Virgil could announce the verdict.

“Not guilty.”

Remus stared at Virgil for a moment, a grin slowly forming on his face as he whooped in joy, celebrating as Logan let out a breath of air. They can finally sleep. Both Janus and Patton stared at him in ‘are you kidding me?’ expression. Virgil watched the husbands have their moment of glee before he could speak again.

“Nice try fuckers, it’s a guilty verdict by a landslide.”

The lawyers nodded as that made sense whereas the partners groaned in unison. Roman slammed the mallet down to announce the end of the case and the sentences carried out. Although the shackles were off the pair, Roman quickly snapped his fingers together to keep the shackles on Logan’s wrists.

“Do you mind, Roman?” He asked the judge as he descended down the stairs.

“Dude, by looking at your face, you’re probably going to kill someone for taking your crofters. Or, well, murdering your 3 year husband? From announcing your secret relationship? Platonic relationship my ass…” He muttered the last part, beckoning Virgil to join him from the jury stand. The lawyered-couple followed from behind, and Logan sat seated as Remus waved from the witness stand.

“Hey Remus?” Logan asked once the door clicked closed when Patton was the last to leave.

“Yeah Cherry-Nerd?”

“5.”

“What? 5?” Remus tilted his head.

Logan summoned Remus’ morning star in his hands, gripping onto it as he stared at Remus. “4.”

“Oh shit-” Remus scrambled to jump off the witness stand to the door. He slammed it open and checked behind him briefly.

“3.”

“ROMAN- ONE OF YOU NEED TO ARREST MY HUSBAND BEFORE HE KILLS ME.”

Even if Logan is pissed, he can appreciate the feeling of finally be called his husband. But now, Remus is going to stay on the couch tonight.

"2... and 1-"

[dmitri-writes]

Listen~Intruloceit Request

INFO -requested by a wattpad user -roman, virgil, and patton are all unintentionally unsympathetic -sympathetic remus and deceit -can you tell how much i love this ship? -logan is constantly cut off and told to hush -deceit has a snake and remus has an octopus -its a long one

TRIGGER WARNINGS -u!pat/ro/vee -panic attack -talk of dead bodies

***

"But what if it was his fault-" "But Thomas would never hurt his friends! And definitely not his boyfriend!" "If I may-" "Oh hush pocket protector, you don't get this topic." Interrupted again. Logan feels anger rise but pushes it back down. Logic is cold. Unemotional. He shuts his mouth tight. "Sure he'd never hurt them on purpose, but you don't know if he said something that made him uncomfortable and he just didn't wanna say anything." "I'm certain that-" "If we just call him I'm sure he'll talk to us!" More anger. It rises farther this time, so Logan pushes it deeper, trying to force it into the ground. Listen listen listen. Shut up shut up shut up. "Are you kidding Princey? He wouldn't even pick up the phone!" "We don't know that!" "He hates us! I know he does!" Logan hears Virgil's voice start to multiply. He knows he can help, if only he would listen, "Virgil-" "No! He hates us he hates us he hates us!" Anger rising again. Everyone's yelling. no one is listening WHY? Why does no one listen? "I told you to stay out of it Logan!" Up up up, it's too much, he's going to burst- "FINE."

All the sides whip their heads to look at Logan. His jaw is clenched, his fists are balled, and his shoulders are tense. "None of you are LISTENING! I can help but you don't... You just shut me up... I just... I just..." Logan's anger turns to sadness and tears start to fall. No one knows what to say. No one knows what to do. Logan? Crying? Logan harshly rubs the tears away, turning his face redder than it was, "I'm leaving." Before anyone can stop him, he sinks out. He doesn't know where he's going, just leaving. Maybe some stars would be nice... Logan arrives at a destination, eyes stuck to the ground until he notices soft sounds like water. He lifts his tear-soaked cheeks to see an ocean washing quietly against a beach, moonlight reflecting on the surface. Moonlight? Logan looks up and sees a dark sky full of stars. These stars are not the same as Thomas'. The same constellations are there but they're in a new order and the stars are connected by strings of light. The planets are also visible in a perfect line, even the earth. His eyes widen as he sees a black hole. How fascinating.

He's soon interrupted from his admiration of the unnatural sky by a sensation on his ankle. Looking down, he realizes there is a small octopus on the sand next to his foot, tentacle attached to his ankle. "Strange." "Jeffrey! Let go of Logan!" Logan jumps at the voice and whips his head towards it. Remus and Deceit stand before him, Remus bending to pick up his octopus and Deceit giving Logan a curious look. "So what brings you to my side of the imagination, Logan?" "Oh um... I was ah... just leaving actually." Logan turns to leave but an arm rises up and grabs him with a gloved hand, gently, but with enough force to hold him in place. Deceit's voice follows, "That isn't suspicious at all. Tell us what you're doing here." Logan huffs and turns back around, staring intently at the ground as he speaks, "I would rather not speak of it. I apologize for intruding."

Silence follows Logan's confession until Deceit finds the words he needs. "Join us. For a walk, that is. We were following the beach to my room." Logan looks at the two warily but walks in line with them. Remus has yet to put down the octopus and is petting the top of its head. Remus must have noticed Logan staring because he smiles at him. "This is my octopus, Jeffrey Dahmer! Wanna pet her?" Logan laughs a small, short laugh, and pets the top of Jeffrey's head. "She's very interesting." Logan and Remus start a conversation about octopi and other sea animals while Deceit watches, studying Logan's face. In due time, they arrive at Deceit's room. He leads the two in and Logan is amazed. He assumed Deceit's room, where lies are the strongest, would have dark corners, many walls, and hidden doors. Logan is shocked to see that Deceit's room is well lit with an open floor plan, and very warm.

"Don't make yourself at home." Remus flops on the pale yellow couch and Logan stands awkwardly next to it. He watches Deceit approach a vivarium against the wall and stick his arm in. A moment passes and Deceit lifts his arm, Logan seeing a yellow and black snake around Deceit's wrist. Logan identifies it as a Chinese false cobra. How fitting. Deceit holds out his arm, and the snake extends its head towards Logan. "She likes to help. Pet her. She'll totally bite." Logan carefully extends a hand and the snake rubs her head into his hand. Logan smiles softly as he plays with the snake. "What's her name?" "Dmitri." Logan finally sits and Deceit's couch and plays with the snake. "She hates you. She's also a terrible comfort animal when you've been disrespected." Logan looks up at Deceit, "How did you know?" Deceit sits next to Logan on the couch, "I heard lies. I didn't listen in. Not sorry." Logan sighs as he watches Dmitri curl up his arm, "It's alright. I'd trust you to keep secrets better than anyone else."

Logan realizes Remus is still there and turns to see him happily playing with Jeffrey, paying no mind to Logan and Dee's conversation. "We both get it," Deceit says, watching Remus. "Being disrespected by the others." "I know. I apologize for them." "You don't have to. Their actions hurt us. Not yours. We know you only want to help them." Remus suddenly perks up and turns to Logan, "Hey do you know a lot about dead bodies?" Logan nods and Remus smiles wide, "Okay, okay, so, let's say I have a body, right? How long would it take to decompose?" "Cause of death?" "Blunt force trauma to the skull." "Any other wounds pre or post mortem?" "No." Deceit watches as Remus asks Logan the weirdest, darkest questions and Logan asks his own to answer Remus'. Dmitri eventually wraps up Deceit's arm and he puts her back in her vivarium, then goes back to watching Logan and Remus, occasionally adding his own input.

"Oh my." Logan stands and Deceit looks at him questioningly. "I should return to my room... Actually, Remus? May I move my room somewhere in your half of the imagination?" Remus shrugs but Deceit holds up a hand. "Moving your room will take a lot of effort and raise many questions with the others. Just pop into your room, get some clothes, leave a note saying where you are, and you can stay here. Take my bed, I'll take the couch." Logan shakes his head, "I don't want to be a burden." Deceit genty grabs Logan's arm, "You won't be. Let's go to your room, I'll talk to one of the others for you. Logan hesitantly nods and Deceit tells Remus to stay put as they sink out of Deceit's room and into Logan's.

As Logan gathers clothes, Deceit walks out of the room and into the Consciousness. He sees Roman and calls out. Roman turns to him and tenses, "Deceit. Do you know where Logan is? We've been trying to talk to him-" "Logan is with me. He'll be staying with me for a bit. Tell the others please." Roman frowns but nods and walks off to find the others. Deceit makes his way back to Logan's room to see him holding a bag. "Read to go?" Logan nods and they sink out. Thankfully, Remus is exactly where they left him. "I'm staying here too tonight Dee!" Deceit rolls his eyes, "Fine. Then what should the sleeping arrangement be?" "You two have known each other the longest, I'm fine with sleeping on the couch." Deceit tries to talk Logan out of it but Logan is determined. Deceit can sense the little lies as Logan says how "My neck will be fine. I don't like contact anyway." He gives up for now and hands Logan some blankets and pillows.

Later that night though, Deceit grins under the covers as he hears the soft padding of feet coming towards his bed. Remus shifts enough in his sleep for Deceit to also shift enough to leave a space for another person. He lifts the covers, speaking gently to Logan, "Get under, there's enough room." Logan finally gives in and gets under the covers next to Deceit. Deceit pulls him closer, "You might fall off." Remus shifts again in his sleep to put an arm across the two. Logan finally relaxes his tensed body and drapes an arm over Deceit and Remus. Deceit smiles, warmth very much welcomed on his cold body. "You'll always be listened to here."