#Lili Frond

[af-answers]

[sinigangrobot]

Artemis Fowl - Alex Rider Crossover #41

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ARCHIVE 🔖

[irunaki]

some character designs

[ven-ugh]

I SWEAR TO GOD they were gfs til the first book

[artemisfowlcodex]

(Holly and Trouble are talking shit about a certain colleague in the LEP HQ mess hall) Lili Frond, walking in: What are you doing? Sounds like you had a patrol with Chix... (Holly sees that Lili is carrying a carton of fries from Spud's Spud Emporium) Holly: She has Spud's-- Lili, where did you get Spud's?! Lili: Uh... Spud's? Holly, holding out a hand: Bitch, gimmie a fry. Lili, scandalised: Is that how you ask?! Holly, enunciating clearly: Bitch, PLEASE Give Me A Fry. (Lili relents and drops one in Holly's hand)

[fowlblue]

Lili headcanons, mayhaps?

Oooo okay- I don’t have many, since I haven’t really thought about her much before.

- Has a serious crush on Captain Short, doesn’t understand why Holly seems so uncomfortable around her.

- She heavily dislikes the way the other fairies in the LEP treat/talk about her, but doesn’t really know how to stand up for herself without any support from her fellow officers. She doesn’t go to many LEP social events like Holly does, instead hanging out with friends outside the force.

- Very curious about Artemis Fowl, but not because of his criminal nature or the like- she also comes from a family with a pronounced legacy, and she wanders what that’s like for Mud Men/how he copes with it all.

- This one’s hard to explain without a drawing, but I like to think elves from old bloodlines have a slightly more “seelie”, classic fairy appearance, looking less human than elves like Holly or Trouble. As a result, Lili doesn’t get to go on surface missions nearly as much as the others, simply because she blends in even less than other members of the People.

[xserpx]

Omg! Firstly, thank you for putting Holly/Trouble on my dash, it fills me with warm fuzzies. Secondly, that sounds like such a fantastic fic idea and I am so ready for the Trouble & Lili buddy cop drama of it all. One of my (very few) other gripes with the series is how Lili is done dirty, and both she and Trouble have much more potential than canon gave them. Fake dating that actually just stays fake dating would be so funny to read XD.

[pacificnorthwesterngothic]

Hey, folks!

I'm wondering if I can ask you all for ideas.

I'm moving from the PNW in August and am aiming to get a botanical tattoo of native plants to console me. I'm thinking Western red cedar fronds and trillium or avalanche lilies so far. But I'm also not a botanist and have spent most of my life going "oh! pretty flower!" when I see a pretty flower and then never finding out what heck it's called.

Do any of you have suggestions?

Is anyone out there certain they know exactly what the best-looking PNW fern is?

This will also be my first tattoo, so any advice you have to send my way would be deeply welcome.

[lumiconic]

" even the sun is soft on the eyes "

✧ swimming with them at different times of day

✧ lyney, lynette, arlecchino ; fluff; it was supposed to have childe and freminent but i ran out of steam T.T

  lyney has a pyro vision, you know that; so his affinity for water must be nothing more than yet another magic trick. it doesn’t help that the golden sun, hanging high in the sky, practically blinds you with its light. when he flicks his hand and a spray from the river goes flying into your eyes, you consider dunking him if he likes it so much.

  “stop splashing me,” you protest, swatting him on the arm. “aren’t you supposed to be looking for rainbow lilies, or whatever?”

  “rainbow roses,” he corrects, wading through the river. his boots are on the bank and his pants are rolled up to his knees, but the vaguely expensive-looking fabric is already drenched, the stain spreading. he barely seems to notice, turning to you as he steps backward. “and if you aren’t gonna get in the water, then i’ll bring the water to – ”

  and then he’s gone with a massive splash, and you start laughing as you watch the flailing mass that’s his not-quite-able-to-swim self sink to the bottom of the river. and then you stop laughing and remember that oh yeah, he’s not quite able to swim. and then you start panicking and dive after him. 

  the water is freezing. it’s the hottest day you’ve had in ages but the deeper you swim, the colder it gets, goosebumps pricking up your arms that you’re barely able to see. you blink the blurriness from your eyes, chasing after lyney, who’s kicking furiously but still sinking with the weight of the heavy cape-thing trailing from his waistcoat. 

  he doesn’t look nervous or even slightly concerned yet. in truth, he could probably snap his fingers and magic himself back onto the riverbank. it’s ridiculous, but you can’t just swim away. at the very least, lynette would kill you. 

  he opens his mouth and a bunch of bubbles stream up towards the surface. his teeth gleam in the pale blue light. he seems to be able to see the scowl on your face, eyes crinkling; a school of gleaming silver fish whirls between you, and when it disappears, he’s on the bottom of the river, scraping into a gently waving anemone. 

  you want to shout what are you doing? but your voice won’t make any noise, much less travel to where he is, while in the water. you punch the water wildly, connecting with a fish exactly as lyney looks up. it squeals, darts away, and he looks at you like you’re a monster. you throw your hands up, floating in place for a moment, before paddling towards him again. 

  he’s still pawing through the fronds of a glowing mushroom-looking thing. you can see the shining blue powder collecting under his fingernails from where you are. he looks like he’s walking along the bottom, one hand clapped over his mouth and the other clenched on a rock to keep him anchored. you scoff, bubbles escaping your lips, and kick towards the bottom.

  “hey!” you hear him exclaim, though it’s more like a garbled shout than an actual word as you link one arm through his, tugging him away from the plants. this deep, it’s like you’ve plunged into a bathtub full of ice cubes. you have no idea how he’s dealing with the cold. “i’m – ”

  the rest of it is lost in bubbles as you brace your legs against the sandy floor, pushing downwards as hard as you can, and you go rocketing towards the sky. he makes some protesting noise, trying to wrestle out of your grip, but you hold on tightly. he would sink like a rock, and then you would have to fight him to come up again. you want to roll your eyes, but… you can’t force yourself to be annoyed. not really.

  you realize his vision is emanating heat. the longer he clings to your arm, the more warmth spreads through you. the river feels less like an ice cube, more like a hot spring. under his puffy sleeves, you can just barely feel his skin, as hot as a fire. if you held on for too long, you might get burned. 

  but right now, it’s okay. right here, when it’s just you and him.

  “i was doing fine,” is the first thing lyney says when his head breaks the surface. you let him go and swim a few feet away. he shakes droplets out of his hair, spraying in a circle; you can’t complain this time since you’re soaking wet too. it’s all you can do not to push him back under. “and i got a bunch of them!”

  “your sister would steal a gardemek and run me over if i just let you sink down there.” you glare at him, crossing your arms as you find a place to stand, feet barely scraping the underwater grass. “i’ve seriously had enough of you – how can you possibly live in fontaine and not know how to swim? and a bunch of what?”

  he digs in his coat, opening his mouth then closing it, a look of panic passing over his face. “w-wait – there’s no way i dropped it as i was coming up, right? after all that work?” he pats down his pockets, eyes going wide as plates. “i think i really did… oh, how could this happen! and i was so proud of myself, too.”

  despite yourself, your face softens. even if you’re annoyed, you have to feel bad at his rapidly mounting dismay. “what did you lose? i can go get it for you, if it’s that important.”

  his gaze whisks to you and you see the corner of his mouth turn up. he reaches towards you, scanning the water and the air around your face as you tilt your head up. “just – wait, i think i see it… aha!” he flicks the wet hair away from your temple and pulls a rainbow rose, shimmering and delicate, from behind your ear. “there it is.” 

  “you – ” you’re speechless, heat creeping up your neck. “where the hell… ”

  “a magician never reveals his secrets, etcetera etcetera.” lyney winks at you, peeling back his sleeve, and a whole pile of flowers falls into the water, bobbing there. the colors are iridescent, gleaming and fantastical. they looks like magic. though, maybe it’s not fair to compare them to magic, not when he’s right there.

  you search for words for a long moment. it’s harder than you would think, with his eyes on you. he shifts his weight forward, displacing the roses in the water. “... you know, you’re supposed to do that trick with a coin.”

  lyney clicks his tongue. “i thought you’d have figured out by now that i don’t do things the conventional way, my lovely.” the name makes your heart beat a bit faster. you swallow. he offers you the first rose and lifts his eyebrows. “go on, you can have it. put it in a vase and think of me whenever you see it.”

  “as if i need a reminder to think of you,” you mumble, taking it and rolling it between your hands. he seems not to hear you, humming as he turns, dragging the tips of his fingers through the surface. the petals are soft, yellow stamen dripping with a thick, sweet scented nectar. “but this is nice too, i guess.”

   you sit on the beach, gazing at lynette through your sunglasses as she skips through the grass a little while away. her boots don’t sink into the ground, moving like she’s lighter than air, despite the sun-softened, slightly damp earth; the tides washing up gently on the sand don’t seem to have any effect on it, either. or maybe she’s not really touching the ground at all. 

  she bends, scoops a glittering silver shell out of the water and pockets it. the water drips through the gauzy fabric of her leotard, and she twirls in place, skirt spinning out. water droplets spray in a circle, carrying through the air in a sudden breeze. she looks towards the horizon, seeming to watch the grass and trees sway in the wind.

  “hey,” you call out. “come here a second.” her ears twitch in your direction and she approaches you, tilting her head down. her hair blows gently back and forth, carrying the sweet scent of peaches and mint towards you, like a fragrant tea. you wouldn’t be surprised if that really was a flavor of tea she had been drinking earlier; you need to tell her sometimes to quit overdoing the caffeine. too often you’ve found her after midnight, reading with bags under her eyes and a teapot emptied ten times over.

  she sits down and you slide your sunglasses onto her head, pushing them down over her eyes. her tail twitches. “what are you doing?”

  “you shouldn’t look directly at the sun,” you admonish. “i know a boy who went out every day without glasses or anything and one day he went blind just like that.” you snap your fingers on the last word. her expression doesn’t change and she doesn’t make any noise, but you feel like you can feel an aura of disapproval radiating from her. you wilt, pouting at her. “huh, no reaction?”

  “you’re obviously lying,” she says plainly.  “i can tell from spending so much time around lyney.”

  “oh, of course,” you say, a smile tugging at your lips. you get to your feet. “come on, we’re here, so why don’t we go in the water? you know a lot of tricks, so you should show me!” 

  you can’t quite see lynette’s eyes through the dark sunglasses, but she shifts her weight to one side, leaning on her hip and unbuckling her boots hesitantly. “... they’re nothing special, but if you really want to see, then i guess – ” 

  “great!” you cheer, pumping your fist and tugging her over the ground to the shallows by the arm. you can’t help but shiver at the sudden chill, but she barely looks bothered, moving like the water doesn’t even exist. her steps are light, sending pale gold sand billowing through the waves, and she whisks away from you in an instant as though she’s dancing.

  she reorients herself, facing a marble pillar edged in gold that sticks out of the water. in a matter of moments she’s submerged up to her chest, and your view of her lower body is distorted as she heads towards the pillar. you clap your hands delightedly, scanning the beach and then racing towards a nearby boat a couple feet from the shore. you scramble onto it, heaving your frame up and over the side to sit with your legs dangling into the lake.

  “go, lynette!” you shout, cupping your hand by your lips to project your voice towards her. she leans her head to the side and looks at you, bright purple eyes glinting as brightly as the inside of an iridescent clamshell. the side of her mouth ticks up in a half-smile. she has your sunglasses clasped in one gloved hand and tucks them into another unseen pocket as she propels herself to the pillar.

  the marble is wet and slippery and from where you’re sitting, you can’t see any cracks or bumps in the smoothly polished stone that could possibly allow her to have such a steady grip, but she climbs easily, scrambling up the side to prop her legs on the top. lynette stares out over the lake, over the city; she feels miles away, coils of hair fluttering around her face. she looks picturesque. she looks like a painting.

  in a heartbeat, she’s on her feet and raising her arms over her head. you’ve seen synchronized swimmers before, with their elegant movements and expensive costumes, and her silhouette against the sun isn’t so far from theirs; with her frilled leotard, gaze sharp as needles and hands reaching towards the sky, she could be one. just another one of her many talents.

  she leaps from the pillar, fingers stretched out before her, and you want to applaud. applaud before she’s even done anything. then again, being with her always feels like a performance. like a dance. here you are, barely a few meters away, and – her eyes are closed. she doesn’t see you as she plummets from the sky to the sea. it feels like there’s something between you, like if you held out your hand you would meet something solid. a wall. or a curtain. 

  there’s barely a splash as she plunges through the surface, tumbling into the water. she disappears in a mass of glittering white bubbles. you lose sight of her, and then she reappears, and you want to jump too, duck underwater to see her fully. to take in every bit of her. 

  her tail flicks behind her, hands pushing through the depths as she goes deeper, less like she’s sinking and more like she’s falling through a clear blue sky. her hair flutters like a bird soaring in the air. she looks so gorgeous, so graceful. someday she will flap her wings and fly away from you. you know that as well as you know anything. when the inevitable deadly winter comes – she will be gone.

  but not yet. you can still keep your eyes on her, floating in the water. you can cup this moment and keep it close to your heart until it’s all you have left.

  lynette surfaces, pushing wet hair out of her eyes, the platinum color darkened to silver. she looks exhilarated, cheeks filled with color, breaths coming fast for a moment before they slow down, returning to her usual impassivity. she looks at you, barely kicking to stay afloat. “... what’s with that look?” she asks, one eyebrow arching. 

  you blink, lean forward to see your reflection. it’s slightly distorted by the soft ripples, but you’re smiling, eyes sparkling. eyes wet. 

  “did something happen?” she asks. her tone is slightly laced with concern. it makes your throat tighten. “you look… emotional.” 

  you lift your head, brushing one hand over your face, avoiding her gaze. “just looking at something pretty,” you say, eyes on the horizon. “that’s all.” 

  arlecchino’s face is cold and stony as always, like her features have been carved out of porcelain, but you think maybe you can trick yourself into seeing a hint of affection in her dark eyes. at the very least, she hasn’t drowned you yet, though her hands have twitched a few times towards your throat when you splashed her “by accident”.

  “it’s so cold,” you complain, dragging your feet through waving strands of seaweed. “it feels like winter.”

  “i don’t feel anything,” arlecchino says, hands laced behind her back. her voice is even, unbothered by the temperature. her suit’s train trails through the surface of the water, silken cloth fading in and out of ice-white, bloodred and gleaming silver. she’s tired today, unable to muster any more words than what’s strictly necessary.

  you tilt your head, smiling wryly as you step towards her. “probably because you’re the reason it’s cold.” it’s true, though she only blinks slowly at the remark; the water cools several degrees around her waist. you’ve made remarks before that she resembles a statue when she stands still, and now is no different – rising out of the lake with the sun setting behind her, hair gleaming like snow. 

  “why are we here again?” she questions. her heels are caught in the murky sand. “we both know that i’m not a swimmer.” 

  “just wait for a bit, until night.” your arms are wrapped around yourself, but you still manage an excited smile, an i-know-something-you-don’t smile. you’re the only person who ever looks at her like that; she’d bite the head off anyone else who dared, but… she just inclines her head. “fine. after that, i’m going home.”

  “okay, okay.” 

  the time passes leisurely. you float on your back, showing arlecchino rocks and shells that you’ve plucked from the sand. she doesn’t respond beyond a nod to most of them, but your pockets grow heavy with the ones that receive an appreciative blink. you snatch up a hermit crab and place it in her hand; when it pinches her palm, she threatens to crush and eat it, prompting a cry of outrage from you.

  the sun slowly drifts below the horizon; golden bleeding to red, then to dark orange, then a sedated gradient of blue. wind whistles through the trees surrounding the lake, and the cries of birds grow quieter and quieter. this secluded pocket of fontaine – far away from the city, the aquabus and anyone who could interrupt you – is somewhere arlecchino has never been. somewhere you’ve been begging to show her for a while now. so far she’s seen nothing remarkable about it, and if it was anyone else, she’d go home, but…

  but.

  the sun is completely gone by now, and the sky is velvet black and speckled with stars. you’re shivering, the shoulders of your gauzy shirt soaked through as you bemoan your decision to wear such thin layers. her face is cold, her eyelids are drifting shut; exhausted from days and days of nonstop work. a thousand duties for the tenth harbinger. 

  and yet you want so badly to show her, whatever it is that you’ve been waiting all day for. so she can stay at least a moment longer.

  the sky dims a bit more, and you push yourself up and onto the riverbank. arlecchino follows a moment after, and as the water laps at her boots, it feels like a shadow passing over her. she tilts her head up and sees that a cloud has drifted past the moon, dimming its silver glow; the air is cold and crisp like a peppermint. you’re sitting with your knees pulled up to your chest. 

  she sits beside you feeling like a child awaiting instruction, legs stretched out in front of her, and looks up at the sky. there’s a few heartbeats where the sound of your breathing fills her ears, shivering and frosty puffs escaping your lips, and then you make a delighted noise. “look, look,” you say, pointing at the water. “it’s glowing.”

  arlecchino glances at you, blinking slowly as if you’re playing a trick on her. but your eyes are riveted to the scene below. she tilts her head, looking down at it, and sees the bright blue sparkles, glimmering in the water like a thousand stars, fallen down from the night sky to rest in the sea. her breath catches in her throat. the river glitters as though it’s filled with gems.

  “isn’t it amazing?” your fingers twitch, like you’re going to try and reach out, touch it. she inches her hand forward inconspicuously, ready to catch you if you lean just a bit too far. you’re not looking at her, transfixed. “it’s beautiful. it looks like a dream.” 

  she peers at it. the azure gleam reflects in her black eyes, the red x-shape of her pupils standing out like fire in a field of flowers. she reaches out, stretches as far as she can, brushes her long, sharp nails through the surface of the water; blue light blooms wherever she touches it. her lips curve up slightly, then press into a flat line again.

  “it’s… ” she stops and blinks fast. “it’s just algae. it’s science. plants. it’s not… a miracle, or anything. there’s no need to fawn over it like that.” 

  you pull your knees up to your chest, touch the top of her hand. her skin is cold, dry and without pores, no marks in her skin anywhere. smooth and empty. you trace the silver lines threading over her fingertips like veins. “even if it’s not magic, it can still be a miracle. you know that, right?”

  she lets you run your hand over her fingers for a moment longer, then pulls it away. “... maybe. but it’s nothing exceptional. it’s a plankton. we could come back here tomorrow night and see it again. it’ll never go anywhere.”

  “that doesn’t change anything,” you say. arlecchino can feel your gaze on her. she looks down into the water, sees the fish swimming through the luminescence, tries to ignore your eyes burning like flames into the side of her head. it’s too pleasant of a feeling to her, who doesn’t understand pain. “just because it’s always there doesn’t mean it’s any less beautiful. maybe that makes it more special.”

  “absence makes the heart grow fonder,” she hums. “you’d probably appreciate it even more if it disappeared for a while.”

  “i don’t think so.” you lean into her, slowly, tentatively. she doesn’t push you away, tucking her hands into her pockets. you shift your attention back down to the sea, as if you’re speaking to it when you say, the radiance of the water illuminated in your irises, “i’d rather have you here with me.”

© lumiconic ; please reblog and follow if enjoyed

[af-answers]

Does anyone else need glasses besides Foaly (for any reason)? I'm curious (and I think we need a break from panicking over MOD and Mod).

Mod: Yeah, this ask references the failed ARG. These asks are all old, but they're refined now, they aged well... mostly. For the sake of "I didn't feel like it", we aren't going to hear from those who we've seen wear glasses before: Myles and Minerva.

Holly: I don't need them normally, but they do help when I have to read the fine print on all this stupid paperwork.

Lili: I've always needed glasses, but I wear contacts to keep up appearances.

Mulch: Yeah, me too.

[sinigangrobot]

Artemis Fowl - Alex Rider Crossover #40

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ARCHIVE 🔖

[irunaki]

lol

[ultravioletence]

wanna see a mallwave affini

palm fronds

bird of paradise

orange lily

hibiscus

bamboo stalks

so much pothos

monstera

is that marble?????

succulents

smooth pebbles

eyes that refract like glass block

nature store sounds of the everglades cd

dolphin earrings

[wimdywhimsy]

since minecraft is hot rn im gonna yap about some of the minecraft worldbuilding ive done for the mobs!!! why not!!! since my favorite are drowned ill go over them and see if anyone actually likes this ehehe

ok so! my most fleshed out thing for them is naming systems. theyre normally named after aquatic natural things and then their name is shortened (or something of the like) into their casual name. so they have both a proper (axolotl) and a common (lottie) name. calling a drowned by their proper name is like full naming someone.

drowned culture varies depending on the body of water obviously. different bodies of water act like different regions. shallow water drowned make clothing (mostly hats and other headwear so their heads dont burn out of water) out of leaves and fronds and lily pads and the like, so theres a lot of fashion and weaving in their culture.

oceanic drowned have a bigger focus on protecting their structures/defending themselves, so their culture is deeply rooted in fighting. their babies grow up learning how to fight.

DIALECTS!!! each 'region' of drowned have a different dialect!! shallow water drowned are more clearly spoken because the water hasnt destroyed their vocal chords as much as oceanic drowned!!!

this is all i can remember right now but i might go into more detail....if u have questions i would be more than happy to answer them rghiurhgrtg i love love love LOVEEE WORLDBUILDING AUGHHHH

[mousetoe-wc]

I Got bored one time awhile ago and made a list of every prefix plus some into organised sections so I thought I might as well share.

All the ones that aren’t cannon to warriors, yet at lest are bold

Describing names

Colours: red, russet, copper, golden, amber, yellow, green, blue, violet, pink, white, gray, black, ebony, dark, pale, silver, brown, tawny, fallow

Pattern, Texture + Size: spot/ted, dapple, speckle, freckle, brindle, patch, mottle, ragged, tangle, kink, bristle, fuzzy, curl/y, wooly, soft, sleek, little, tiny, small, slight, short, tall, long, big, heavy, crooked, broken, half, stumpy, shred, torn, jagged

Actions + Character: flip, pounce, bounce, jump, hop, crouch, down, low, drift, flail, strike, running, fidget, mumble, whistle, snap, sneeze, shiver/ing, shining, flutter, fallen, lost, rush, fleet, quick, shy, sweet, brave, loud, quiet, wild, hope, wish,

Other: claw, whisker, dead, odd, one, spike, fringe, echo, song, hallow, haven

Elements

Time + Weather: day, night, dusk, dawn, morning, sky, sun/ny, moon, storm, lightning, thunder, cloud/y, mist/y, fog, snow, blizzard, ice, frost, dew, drizzle, rain, clear, wind, breeze, gale, shadow, shade, bright, light,

Earth/Water/Fire names: stone, rock, boulder, slate, flint, pebble, gravel, sand/y, dust, mud/dy, meadow, hill, rubble, river, ripple, whorl, float, rapid, shimmer, lake, swamp, marsh, wave, wet, bubbling, splash, puddle, pool, creek, fire, flame, flicker, flash, blaze, scorch, ember, spark, ash, soot, cinder, smoke

Plants

Trees: alder, aspen, birch, beech, cedar, cypress, pine, elm, willow, oak, larch, maple, bay, rowan, timber, bark, log, wood, twig, acorn, cone, seed, spire

Berry/Nut/Fruit/Herb: juniper, elder, sloe, holly, yew, mistle, bramble, hickory, hazel, chestnut, nut, apple, cherry, cranberry, olive, pear, plum, peach, chive, mint, fennel, sage, basil, mallow, parsley

Flowers: aster, poppy, primrose, rose, bluebell, marigold, tansy, pansy, briar, cherry, daisy, dandelion, daffodil, tulip, violet, lily, myrtle, thrift, yarrow, heather, lavender, blossom, bloom, flower, petal

Other: leaf, frond, fern, bracken, sorrel, hay, rye, oat, wheat, cotton, reed, pod, cinnamon, milkweed, grass, clover, weed, stem, sedge, gorse, furze, flax, nettle, thistle, ivy, moss, lichen, bush, vine, root, thorn, prickle, nectar

Animals

Mammals: mouse, rat, mole, vole, shrew, squirrel, hedgehog, bat, rabbit, hare, ferret, weasel, stoat, mink, marten, otter, hog, wolf, hound, fox, vixen, badger, deer, doe, stag, fawn, sheep, cow, pig, lion, tiger, leopard, lynx, milk

Birds: robin, jay, cardinal, thrush, sparrow, swallow, shrike, starling, rook, swift, dove, pigeon, crow, raven, duck, goose, heron, wren, finch, swan, stork, quail, gull, lark, owl, eagle, hawk, kestrel, buzzard, kite, hoot, feather, bird, egg, talon

Fish, Reptiles + Amphibians: pike, perch, pollack, trout, tench, cod, carp, bass, bream, eel, minnow, fin, snake, adder, lizard, turtle, frog, toad, newt

Bug type Names: bug, lady or ladybug, moth, spider, ant, snail, slug, beetle, bee, wasp, dragon or dragonfly, bumble, worm, maggot, cricket, fly, midge, web, honey

Skyclan + Warriorclan: Bella, Billy, Big, Harry, Harvey, Snook, Ebony, Monkey

[artemis-fowl-incident-report]

Welcome to my throwback day contribution!

So I did a post a while back talking about what I would have done with the Fowl Twins books, and a subsequent chapter by chapter breakdown for the second book. And thus, as my throwback, I'm gonna break down what I would have done for "Deny all Charges" aka the third one.

(Just to preface, I never finished the third book. I dont know what Eoin was doing there, but I wanted no part of it)

Chapter 1

The Twins have recently turned 14. Following the trend of his character development from my version of book 2, Beckett has really come into his own, doubling down on his talent for engineering and languages, and is actively working on writing his first children's book (since he found that, with all his passion for the "Alien Pooping Boy" books, he might as well try writing all his ideas for himself). Beckett also keeps bees now, since he can talk with them, and bees are one of the only creatures that consent to their domestication by humans. Myles is as snarky as ever, but is a bit less vicious about it, since he's begun realising how hurtful some of his statements can be.

The boys are in Italy with their parents, visiting their Uncle Foxy and his boyfriend, one Giovanni Zito (because I said so). They're just discussing when Artemis will be returning from Mars when the boys get a message. The Crown of Frond they saved from the last book has been stolen from the Section 8 archives. The trail leads to Venice, so the boys head over to investigate.

They tail behind the fairy thief who they believe stole the item as they twist and turn through the city until they come to a church. Just as they get there, however, the building blows up. No one is hurt, but they can only assume their target is dead.

Chapter 2

As they're preparing to head home, Myles keeps fretting about the explosion. He goes over the security footage over and over, until he remembers that many churches have catacombs under them. He keeps researching until he comes across footage of their thief being whisked away by a boat that looks like an ACRONYM vestal.

Cut to their fairy nervously pacing around a safe house, wondering if the money was worth it- BLAM! Beckett knocks down the door. Between the two of them (and Whistle Blower, who they keep threatening to feed the fairy to) their thief confesses that he stole the crown for one Lord Teddy Bleedham-Drye. The only other information he has is that he's going to be attacking a fairy magical research lab on the Devon moors soon.

They leave him, wandering through the streets to where Lazuli parked the shuttle. Beckett wonders if Artemis will be back in time for this adventure, and how it would be fun for them to get to solve this problem together. Myles is less enthused, noting that Artemis would probably get himself killed with his lack of self preservation instincts.

Chapter 3

A few days later, Lazuli, Myles, and Beckett (with Whistle Blower in his backpack) scale the Devonshire Moors. Since the area is well known for its military training camps they deemed it best to go by foot.

Lazuli is doing rather well since the last book, discovering she was from a secret branch of the Frond royal family. She's practically been adopted by Lily Frond, since most of Lily's family isn't great and she always wanted a sister. They may only be distantly related, but its the only family Lazuli's ever had (my heart!)

The magical testing facility is disguised as a Tor (big piles of granite that jut from the moors surface). But its clearly been attacked recently, with chunks taken from the surface, revealing the buildings structure underneath.

They head inside, learning that all the scientists and engineers have been kidnapped, and one piece of tech stolen. A magic amplifier. It was originally being developed for No1, as a way for him to cast spells on mass like healing the Amazonian rainforests or large groups of people during emergencies.

As the Regrettables leave they find themselves surrounded by the British Army. They're about to be fired upon, when a bright light shines down upon them. A ship descends, and a familiar voice in their ear pieces telling them to cover their eyes. There's a brilliant flash of light, and the army men drop to the ground, dazed and mind wiped of the last hour.

The spaceship's pod descends and two people step out. Butler and Artemis.

Chapter 4

Everyone (except for Myles) is overjoyed to see Artemis. He and Butler are rushed down the Haven with the Regrettables, and tearfully reunite with their friends, before buckling down and getting to business. (yes, Artemis is most pleased to be back on earth because he gets to wear suits again. Go figure)

Myles does not appreciate being side-lined like this, being treated like a child as Artemis and the others take over the situation. (Beckett tries to point out that they are actually children, but it doesn't go well for him). Its actually Lily Frond who gives them the means to listen in on the situation, having the keys to the office connecting to the situation room.

Turns out the machine is missing one key element, a very rare crystal that draws in magical energy from its environment and stores it within itself. They decide to contact Minerva about it, but it will take a day or so, since she's still a smuggler in this story, but a more high quality smuggler (also, Artemis is Godfather to Minerva's daughter. Its so sweet). Myles convinces Beckett they need to go to Minerva themselves, for which they steal a pod and head for the surface. (They leave Lazuli behind since they want her to, you know, keep her job)

Not that Beckett doesn't like a good heist, but he's usually the impulsive of of the two. He doesn't understand where this grim determination has come from with his brother. When pressed on the subject, Myles simply points out they shouldn't be overlooked like this.

Chapter 5

They turn up in New Orleans, and Minerva is very confused, but agrees to help when the situation is explained. Turns out, she has just the rock they are looking for, and a large chunk of it at that. The Twins buy it off her (because they got that Fowl money, you know what I mean?) and decide to take it to a secure location so Teddy cant get his hands on it.

Teddy gets his hands on it. He attacks the boys as they're transporting the crystal. During his big Villain monologue, he reveals he wants to be King of England, and he will use the fairy people to do so. He does, however, accidentally mention that a certain "she" will demand her share as well.

The twins are pushed from the pod, but not before Myles accidentally manages to get hold of a baby chunk of the crystal. They fall into the Atlantic Ocean, being picked up by a fairy rescue vestal.

Chapter 6

Back at Villa Eco, the twins get scolded by their parents and Artemis. Beckett kind of accepts it, but Myles refuses to. He runs away, reflecting on how all of this has been an absolute mess, that maybe they really should have left it to Artemis and the others.

When he catches up to him, Artemis and Myles have a heart to heart. Myles admits that he used to idolise Artemis, that he thought his big brother could do anything. But then he got himself killed at the end of the Last Guardian. Worse than that, he got killed from information Myles supplied him with after being possessed. He wants to be an equal to his brother, he wants to be close to him, but he felt his death stronger than anyone else. And then, when Artemis came back, he headed off to Mars like an Interstellar hipster on a gap year trying to "find himself".

Artemis apologises, explaining that he'd lived his first life for other people for so long, being the genius, the heir, Artemis Fowl II, that he didn't really know who Artemis was away from those things. He just wanted to keep his family safe, even though he had no idea how to be anything but a stranger in said family. That he should have reflected more on how him and Beckett were affected, that he does see them as his equals, and that he's sorry.

They hug it out. Myles is crying, Artemis is crying (I'm crying!)

Chapter 7

Much like the Death Star, it turns out this magical amplifier has a very specific (plot contrived) flaw. The crystal at its heart is not only rare, but its very fragile. If shot through with the right frequency, it will shatter and explode, all the magical energy contained inside it bursting out in one shot. However, they don't know what that frequency is, since they would have to run tests on some of that specific crystal vein.

Myles is happy to announce that he has one of said crystals, but will only hand it over to the LEP if they agree to let him and Beckett help. Their parents try and argue against it, but finally (finally) realise that nothing will stop their sons if theirs something they want to do and so elect to come along and help.

They fly across to Isle of Scilly to meet up with the rest of the team. Lord Teddy's manor is a virtual fortress, guarded by the fairy scientists and engineers he had kidnapped from Devon. They're clearly being mind controlled, and they have anti shield goggles on, so there's no way they could attack the house by air.

They had, however, contacted the Hortenut Seven, through Mulch, to dig them in. While they face off against Teddy, the dwarves will disable the guards, in exchange for Artemis backing their political interests (he has quite a bit of sway with the People since his resurrection, being viewed more like a Hero than the monster he used to be).

Artemis Sr and Angeline are actually surprisingly good help navigating the halls of Childblain House (turns out Angeline used to be a cat-burglar and Tim was, you know, a former crime lord so that helps). They reach the grand hall where the machine has been set up, the crystal humming away menacingly.

They each separate into one of three teams. Team A, Myles, Fowl Sr, and Butler (who between them are lugging a large box). They will be dug around the back of the hall by Mulch through the garden. Team B, Angeline, Juliet, and Beckett move to various positions around darkened hall out of sight ready to snatch the crown at the first opportunity. And Team C, Holly and Lazuli, who are shielded in the rafters with their guns ready if something goes wrong. Foaly is also there, in spirit, or rather on tech support, using his little bug drones from the Last Guardian to keep eyes on everyone.

Taking a breath Artemis, now wearing a gloop tie and glasses, steps into the hall.

Chapter 8

Artemis tries shooting at Teddy, but misses, being tackled and chained down by fairy guards for his trouble. When Teddy comes closer to inspect the intruder, he's told that this is "Myles" come back from the future to stop him. The maddened Lord wholeheartedly believes this, and takes it as a sign of his future victory. Since, if he hadn't won, there would be no need for "Myles" to have been sent back.

The crystal is changed up. Teddy is monologuing, strolling up have the crown on his head hooked up to the machine, regal in his throne

BLAM

He's shot in the chest.

Teddy looks over, betrayed, as Sister Jeronima, or rather her corps puppeteered around by Opal's ghost emerges.

All the fairies are suddenly released from the crowns spell and try to run, only to freeze back in place as Opal puts the crown on her own head.

Of course she has a villain speech, and of course she knows its Artemis. She talks about how he's always been small and pathetic, with a mind that could once rule the world but no resolve to do so.

She gets her guards to round up all the various Fowl's, Butler's and others. She hooks herself up to the machine, ordering Holly and Lazuli to take aim at their friends.

BOOM!

The crystal explodes, the machine Myles had set up vibrating at just the right frequency to release the magic trapped inside. There's chaos, Opal trying to order her fairy minions as the humans all rush forward to get the crown. Angeline is actually the one to get Opal, punching her in the face with a war cry of "that's for what you've done to my sons!" as Whistle Blower tears Opal/Jeronima's ankles to shreds.

But not before Lazuli goes to take a shot at Artemis, with Myles pushing him out the way.

Chapter 9

Between the two of them, Holly and Lazuli manage to heal Myles, where he wakes up in his big brothers arms.

It ends with them all sitting on the beach eating ice cream, waiting for the LEP to come sort out the mess and take Opal into custody.

They give the crown to Lazuli to look after, who resolves to hide it just as her ancestor Darach wanted.

Artemis tells his brothers how truly proud he is of them, and how he hopes this is the Fowl's legacy. He called an old man by Beckett, and a simpletoon by Myles.

The end

(I have been writing since 3am and now it is 7am. Why do I do this to myself? I have no idea)