#Like yall literally know what you're doing. Because we fucking taught you.

[gingerswagfreckles]

You know the problem with having talked in depth for so many years about how to spot antisemetic dogwhistles and how people use conspiratorial thinking and bad faith derailing arguments to promote bigotry against Jews. Is that now everyone knows how to do it on purpose. Lol.

[astonmartinii]

babysitter duty | max verstappen social media au

pairing: max verstappen x reader

an emergency meeting at red bull means max finally meets the horner family babysitter and chaos ensues

note: i will obviously not be using christian's real kids in this, this is a work of fiction. there will be no real pictures of his kids, neither will i use their real names (i actually have no clue what they are and cannot be bothered to google it lol)

yourusername added to their story

[caption: when all the big businessmen crash baking night]

yourusername

liked by yourbff and others

tagged: yourbff

yourusername: last weekend before the eff won starts again i.e. my last weekend before my only friends are literal children

view all 27 comments

yourbff bring the kids out me thinks

yourusername my boss literally follows this account dumbass

christianhorner do not take my children clubbing

yourusername YES SIR 🫡

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, christianhorner and 223 others

yourusername: wasn't raining in oxford for once so a picnic was only necessary

view all 10 comments

yourbff they're so so precious

christianhorner who taught her that sign?

yourusername you did??? stop swearing so much in drive to survive sir

maxverstappen1 she's not wrong

christianhorner why are you here?

maxverstappen1

liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 601,778 others

maxverstappen1 best way to start the season and to end a ten year drought in Bahrain!! thank you to everyone in the garage and all the fans in the stands

view all 10,865 comments

yourusername smashed it maxy

maxverstappen1 why thank you i'm blushing

user67 what. the. fuck. is that ^^^

themaxverstappenstan33 i am actually bamboozled

danielricciardo ignoring whatever meltdown is happening in these comments - congrats max !!

yourusername added to their story

[caption: school run days]

maxverstappen1 added to their story

f1wagsupdates

liked by f1girly77, likedbypierre and 77 others

f1wagsupdates this is y/n y/ln, she's a live-in babysitter for christian horner and more recently, she seems to be the one catching max verstappen's attention. as far as we know they first met after the top officials at red bull met for an emergency meeting at christian horner's home - we know she was present because she posted on her story with one of the kids baking during the meeting. since then she has been commenting on his posts and max posted a picture of him with a girl on his story in an outfit y/n has posted in before. do you think they're cute?

view all 21 comments

yourusername someone fancies themselves a detective

user34 oof she gagged yall

hugsforcharles tbf she has a point, you guys are digging way too into all of it

lilacverstappen i know this is a gross invasion of privacy but i kinda think they're cute

user33 you're not wrong

maxverstappen1

liked by yourusername, pierregasly and 1,206,781 others

tagged: yourusername

maxverstappen1 fuck u sherlock holmes i'll decide when i announce my relationship ... anyhow, you're cute, sorry christian but you're going to have to find a new babysitter

view all 23,089 comments

yourusername I LOVE YOU MAXY but i love those kids more so looks like you're movign to oxford

maxverstappen1 i never agreed to that

yourusername say goodbye to the tax free life and say hello to crayons and picnics

christianhorner you'll have three very angry kids to deal with max, but aside from that, i'm very happy for the both of you

yourusername love you bossman

maxverstappen1 love you bossman

danielricciardo this is not usually how this plot line ends

landonorris STOP RIGHT THERE OLD MAN THIS IS A WHOLESOME POST

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, christianhorner and 22,301 others

tagged: maxverstappen1

yourusername add max moving into christian's house to ur f1 bingo cards - you can't take me away from these kids, they're kinda my only friends

view all 3,451 comments

maxverstappen1 i've been here one day and i'm convinced @christianhorner ur kids are evil geniuses

yourusername obvs they are maxy, they're salty spice's kids

user46 omg she calls him salty spice as well

christianhorner don't make me regret giving you a room near mine

yourusername GET YOUR MIND OUT OF THE GUTTER CHRISTIAN... maybe invest in some ear plugs ;)

christianhorner consider this your eviction notice

note: bit of a random one lol but i had fun. i know people don't like christian (for good reason) but he's the one it worked with. ALSO my asks are open now !!! so ask away xx

[aprilmayverse]

mayverse dash simulator 2 but this time its if they had a fandom

💀 winered Follow "we need more complex mentally ill female characters" you people couldnt even handle june july.

💄 october-november Follow why are we all acting as if april was in the wrong for not wanting to traumadump on a literal child?

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow she literally did not tell her anything

💄 october-november Follow did she not tell her about the poisioning.

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow yeah, nearly half a decade after it happened

💄 october-november Follow well was she just supposed to tell her as soon as it happened? june was like 8 or 9 at the time

👠 pinkbitchnamedbreakfast Follow i'm just saying it's fucked up of her

🌺 ithinkihauvejaundice Follow june and dys did nothing wrong. "what about the murders" god forbid a couple middle school girls have some sleepover fun. those people deserved it anyway

⛅️ evil-wifeguy-lesbian Follow june july was the realest bitch out there because if MY girlfriend needed someone dead i would do it in an instant

☀️ peacenloveonplanetsapphic Follow i don't want you to murder people for me dearest we've been over this i don't need anyone dead

🍂 littlejester Follow

🌎 thefuckingwizard Follow "february march gaslight gatekeep girlboss" this and that. wheres my february cringefailgirl truthers

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow i think that if i lost a bad bitch to an arranged marriage i would do what dinah did too

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow i think i hauve a mental illness

🐬 celerytheworld Follow was it casual when you promised we were going to get married as kids, were my first kiss, told me you'd be in love with me and marry me and take me on dates if one of us was the opposite gender, told me you'd love me more than your husband if we ever got married, told me you'd rather hang out with me then get married to a man, told me i'd look beautiful in a wedding dress, and then killed yourself?

🧑 normal-guy Follow op are you ok

🐬 celerytheworld Follow

🩸 murderenjoyer Follow inherent homoeroticism of killing someone together

👻 yaoifreak Follow pascal may x mr thorgett. old man yaoi anyone

🧢 whitemormonwasted Follow when i said pascal may did 9/11 this isnt what i meant

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow june july is a vriska

🧣 februarymarches Follow christly shippers dont fucking interact with me! for obvious reasons! theres a four year gap there!

🌎 thefuckingwizard Follow i dont ship them but like...op how many years do you think are in between 15 and 17?

🧣 februarymarches Follow it's an eighth grader and a senior yall disgust me. four year age gap. proshitters dni is already in my bio, stop shipping a literal child with a high school senior

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow 15 is not a "literal child" op

🧣 februarymarches Follow >14 in bio

⭐️ stars-discourse-sideblog Follow you're both wrong it's three years

🔥 sometimesthorgett Follow 9/11 MENTIONED

👻 yaoifreak Follow christly are both straight men anyway. if u want yaoi try pascal x thorgett

🧢 whitemormonwasted Follow those are two different characters + pascal had a wife

👻 yaoifreak Follow https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bisexuality

🕷 thirdsilliestvriskakinnie Follow 2001 and 1999 were two years apart i don't think they taught anyone on this site to read

👻 yaoifreak Follow READ?

🪼 dysapppointment Follow just saw june july's ilb design and holy shit not to be a lesbian but

🍋 thosedamnlemonstealingwhores Follow username checks out

🎱 tragedyenjoyer Follow ogigugh calendar siblings december sisters badmann siblings shiz siblings collins siblings what if i Died

🧣 februarymarches Follow just so you guys know op is a dacarol shipper. don't reblog from them.

🎱 tragedyenjoyer Follow i have bad news about the creators of the thing you're a fan of

🍂 littlejester Follow trudy cryme more like tru-deez nuts gottem

🛍️ poetrynjoyer Follow mayverse is so interesting bc you have beautiful heartfelt writing about love and loss and hope and family and friendship and romance and tragedy and loving despite with such complex women and you also have shit like "monk clickbaiter fraggot" and "9/11 porn games on steam" and whatevers going on at jms

🧲 whysoyurious Follow MAYVERSE HIT 100K F/F FICS ON AO3 WHO CHEERED

🎀 apricotmayonaise Follow making a list of who could and couldntve possibly done 9/11 in the mayverse, is doing 9/11 a sin in dana's cult?

🐝 incoherentbee Follow

YES?!??!?!?!?

[rae-of-gold]

im sorry, let me get this straight. Yall think the girly-pop/overly feminine trend happening right now is...reinforcing misogyny?

Im gonna try to be as nice as i possibly can and explain why that's wrong and you are misinterpreting what's happening. cause jesus fuckin christ some of yall are dumb.

Throughout our lives we're taught that being feminine is a bad thing. whether you were raised as a boy or a girl, it's taught as a bad thing. That only girls can be feminine and only when they're very young. Eventually you need to grow out of it. That you cant wear bright colors in the workplace, you cant do your makeup in an artistic way, that your hair must be a certain length and style or else no one will take you seriously.

We're taught that if a boy shows any sort of femininity, there's something wrong with them. That feminine things are below them, and anyone who displays any feminine traits are below them. that anyone who is feminine must be dumb and and will follow anything a masculine person says because they are the stable one of the two. That "feminine" is inherently childish and lesser.

And we are all taught this! Almost all of us go through a "i'm not like other girls" phase because of this teaching. We view other women as competition because if you're not feminine enough, you'll lose your boyfriend/husband. That feminine girls are dumb sluts that are below you because you're a woman with a respectable job that doesn't allow you to be feminine and a husband that thinks you're cheating on him if you were a little more makeup than usual.

Even right now, I've been taking time to make sure my spelling, punctuation and grammar are proper because i know people won't take me seriously if i don't. Especially for what I'm advocating.

The girly-pop trend is about solidarity between anyone feminine. To understand that just because we wear pink and dresses and need someone to help explain complex situations with analogies to shopping and boys, doesn't mean we're not intelligent or lesser than our masculine counterparts. It's about being feminine in spite of what misogyny says about it. That people who do feminine things are equal to everyone else and are doing it for themselves, not others.

And going back to the girl who explains complex things going on with our country and the world but does so "for the girlies". I better not hear a single damn thing against her because she is doing exactly what every neurodivergent person in school wanted our teachers to do which is accommodating people and helping them learn in a way that's best for them and doesn't do it in a demeaning way. If it doesn't work for you, then great, shut the fuck up because it helps other people, myself included.

If you think that being feminine, like literally just existing in a more feminine way than the norm, is perpetuating misogyny you're the problem. You are the one associating femininity with misogyny. We are just existing and wearing pink.

[rigginsstreet]

People who view Billy's character in such a negative one-dimensional way come across as so sheltered to me. He really reminds me of my dad in a lot of ways, and when we watched S2 and 3 together we revisited convos about what it was like for my dad to grow up with a father like Neil, a mother who let him down, step-siblings he had toxic relationships with, and what it was like to have to let go of the ways he learned to survive it all. People really undestimate just how hard it is to break the cycle of violence when you're all on your own. If you're young and by yourself, with very little money or access to resources about abuse, then you just have to blindly stumble into the life lessons you need.

At the same time people also undestimate how capable of change people can be when they actually have a chance. Once my dad was out of his father's house during his 20s he had room to breathe and actually grow up. He put all his anger and fear into learning a trade instead of taking it out on others, put effort into learning about the people and cultures he was taught to be racist against, and eventually found a career working with young people so he could be the supportive figure he needed when he was their age.

Lots of folks who grow up to be good people were like Billy or like my dad when they were younger. Billy's story gets cut short before we get to see that though. It's still important to know that even if a victim of abuse is an asshole and a product of their shitty environment that doesn't mean they aren't worthy of help. You don't have to like them but that doesn't make them irredeemable. If people's support abuse victims is conditional on their moral purity then they are not the allies they think they are.

(also love the idea of Billy working with young people in his future one of my fave personal headcanons)

billy antis to me fall into the camp of either 1. being incredibly sheltered and having no idea what the fuck theyre talking about or 2. they say billy reminds them of whatever abuser they personally had in their life, so automatically theyre unable to separate that bias and generally its fuck whoever talks positively about billy (ive seen a FEW people able to see reason but....) 

and like thats a whole separate issue coming from the riverdale fandom and preferring the parents over the kids, all the damn time i had to hear people coming into mine or my friends inboxes/posts trauma dumping because x parent remind them of their parent etc etc and like girl... what does that got to do with me. like sorry you went through that but whats that got to do with me.

people need to learn how to separate fiction from reality. thats the first problem that needs to be addressed

but like if yall WANT to make it this deep and talk about the real world and shit, its so counterproductive to talk about abusive victims who are literal children and deciding theyre beyond redemption. its also very convenient how people pick and choose when someones a child. if you did x thing at age 17 youre a child but if you do z thing youre an adult. make it make sense. 

i feel like these people just... dont exist in reality? like i have to imagine theyre only interactions with other people are their echo chambers online because SURELY you cannot be interacting with real life human beings day to day in the real world and coming to these conclusions. people are incredibly nuanced. everyones got skeletons in their closet. everyones got things in their past they are not proud of. its what theyve made of themselves since their darkest moments that matters. its what people choose to do with themselves once they identify their problems and issues that matters. billy LITERALLY GAVE UP HIS LIFE. and its not enough for people. which is... insane to me. and heinously cruel minded. especially paired with how they go on to treat REAL PEOPLE for understanding his character. “i hate this character because theyre mean and bigoted so to show this i will go on and be mean and bigoted to other people”. like yall need some windex for your mirrors cuz clearly somethings not getting through when you look into it every day.

my brother and i had a notoriously toxic relationship when we lived together. we’re still not particularly close probably because of that (also theres a 7 year age difference so that was never gonna help) but like literally last time we were together a week or two ago to put up the christmas tree we were getting along, he even volunteered for all things to put our initial ornaments next to each other on the tree. we snuck upstairs before dinner to hang out in my room and smoke lmfao like... amazing what distance can do for a relationship i have full faith that all billy and max needed was for billy to move out and get away from neil and they would be maybe not besties but surely a hell of a lot closer than they could be under current circumstances.

people just dont want to put in the brainpower to think long term. they dont want to face the facts of billys situation because then they would have to realize how fucking shitty they are to people like him. and no one wants to do that. no one wants to realize theyve been the villain this whole time lmao

i had another thought but i lost it which is probably for the best cuz this response is already long as hell. 

[just-antithings]

controversial opinion but the thing about fiction affecting reality is that antis treat it as if media is supposed to be an effective babysitter, or they bring up military propaganda which is. okay. something that the government pours funds into to try slide this subtle "military good" is, indeed, going to affect kids if you sit them down on a fun movie about war that overglorifies it into this "dying for your country is an HONOR" and not explain to them how it's propaganda. (yall really use "critical thinking" and then not even teach kids how to actually use critical thinking skills and blame everyone else for it huh)

my porn comic where i make my original the character fuck his brother isn't even for kids. game of thrones wasn't even for kids. or here's a fun one, greek mythology. that's taught to kids in school right? surely it must impact reality then!!! except. none of these things normalized fucking your brother because

1. adults should and usually know better than to let it get to the kids. or to let kids engage in nsfw content to begin with that is NOT FOR THEM. and if they failed, that's why we have warnings up to begin with. 18+ only, this game is rated r, viewer discretion is advised, yada yada. honestly if you put a phone in front of your kid and act like it's the internet's responsibility to be a babysitter, you're not even a parent. the phone is.

2. if greek mythology alone didn't already normalize incest by now, someone's 4k word fanfic on ao3 ain't gonna do shit. y'all don't actually care tho, you just want an easy target. it's been proven time and time again.

what IS likely to normalize it though is treating it as if it's a taboo subject nobody is allowed to talk about, that's literally why we get dumbass teenagers experimenting with things like sex, drugs and alcohol. they see the cookie jar on the fridge, all they know is "cookies are in there. i don't know why i can't have any, and nobody will tell me why. i don't see why i can't have any, cookies taste good."

this was supposed to be an ask the size of a tweet and i became unhinged out of sheer rage. fun day

👆👆👆👆

[hopefulstarfire]

Alright we're gonna have some individual posts for ocs for some different little headcanons so here we go, we'll start with Kat!

Kat fully believes Dolly Parton can walk on water. That is her all time idol. She owns every album she has and has several of them signed. She wants to go to Dollywood at least once a year. Steel Magnolias and 9 to 5 are some of her all time favorite movies.

Dollywood apparently also has a squishmallow store and this is what starts her little addiction...okay, major. She owns so many damn squishmallows and most of them take up her bed.

She also has merch for some of the Sanrio characters like My Melody and Cinnamaroll.

The little pink ribbon she wears in her hair is in honor of both her older sister Cecelia and her cousin Sonia. Both of their designs featured them with the big pink bows in their hair (Cecelia's when she was younger) and Cecelias big poofy flowy dress had pink ribbons on it. I think it was kind of their thing they did and she keeps up with it for them. In her mind, it makes them feel closer.

Her Aunt Chelsea taught her all about self defense as she was growing up and people don't really expect this super girly, bright eyed, kinda small girl to pack a punch and she very much uses that to her advantage. She has literally drop kicked Weevil at a tournament once.

Kat's very good at strategy and thinking logically and working out problems. She fucking hates math. It's not that she's bad per se; she doesn't show her work nor really know how to because she's like "okay I know the answer why do I have to show where it came from, yall are supposed to teach me that why do I gotta explain it to yall."

She also is just. Not a great cook. She can cook steak and bake cookies and make Ramen from a package. That's about it. Legitimately can't even scramble an egg. Help her.

Was 1000% a Winx Club and Sailor Moon kid, on top of being a Barbie and Bratz kid.

Even though she lives with her godparents in San Diego, she does call back home to her Uncle Wes and Memaw Josie frequently, at least once a week and does try to go see them when she can. Especially bc she can go see her animals at the ranch, i.e. her pet cow Milkshake she raised from a calf, her horse Rain and her and Cecelias pet emu Oscar.

Is a true ride or die friend. She'll stab someone for you without hesitation but she'll also call you out when you're not doing proper self care.

[saksukei]

mermaid yeosang au

[plenty of curses lol and also this is hella long ,,,,, so I'm sorry] This was once again inspired by warmau, please check them out! I love their writing.

other mermaid aus; yunho san

when your friends said you were a dumb fuck you begged to differ but now you just agree

because really– you have proved how low your IQ level is when you went to the beach

It was a cloudy day and it was supposed to rain later on but you and your friends were already at the beach– so you decided you might as well enjoy

you wanted to go for a swim but all your friends refused and said that they preferred to stick to the shallow water

you went in for a swim in the deep water, where the waves form because you go out to swim pretty often ,,,, especially this place

but then it started raining cats and dogs

and the current started becoming stronger

your grade A swimming skills couldn't save you because even as you were trying to swim against the current, the water was just sweeping you away

The only thing you could hear were your friends screaming for the one second you managed to get out and then you were back in

salt water going through your nose

and you felt like this was it

because getting out of the water is impossible and you've heard countless stories of people drowning, never thinking you were going to go be one of them

and this isn't some movie where you get washed up on some shore on an island and find your way back home

and so you just let the water take you with itself

Till you felt a strong grip on your wrist

you couldn't see clearly because the salt water and the sand was hurting your eyes

but you felt something wrap it's arms around you tightly and drag you away with full force

you felt everything fade away as you lost consciousness

you eyes fluttered open and you jolted up

you found yourself on this flat rock on some unknown shoreline?

“oh good– you're up,” you heard someone say from behind you.

You turned around to see a white haired boy, prominent cheek bones, angular face, melanin skin, a weak smile on his lips

and then you noticed–

the huge gash that went from his ankle to almost his knee

“w-what ,,,,, how did this happen? Are you okay?” you asked, worryingly, as you inched closer to him.

“oh I'm a hundred percent fine!” he replied in a sarcastic tone, pointing towards his leg

hE SOUNDED LIKE A WHINY BITCH

“rude,” you hissed, as you tore your sleeve, wrapping it around his leg to cover the wound

“please stop– this ,,, it won't help,” he pointed towards the bandage.

“i know it's not great but it'll be worse if I don't do this now,” you answered.

“no you don't understand,” he interrupted, his tone stern.

“what do I not understand? This is one of the things I've been taught to do in case someone gets wounded and this prevents bacterial infection from happening–”

“I'm a mermaid,,,,,,” he confessed.

and you stopped dead in your tracks

“y-youre a ,,,,, what?” you asked him again

“don't tell anyone please,” he grumbled. “I don't want a fanclub”

“oh my god ,,,, you're a mermaid but you're also a dick, congrats!” you replied, clearly annoyed.

I MEAN WHO DOES THIS GUY THINK HE IS???

and he just rolled his eyes

“why don't you just tell me how I can help because I don't want to be responsible for murder,” you hissed.

Yeosang scoffed and kept thinking of a solution, till an idea popped into his mind, a smile on his face

You could see the light bulb over his head

“well- there are these things we use to heal and keep ourselves strong ,,,,, they're a type of seashell.....”

“oh god– this will be like finding a needle in a haystack,” you sighed.

“no actually the shell is the color of my tail which is emerald green, with white lines and we don't carry these shells with us, but rather– they find us when we are in need,” he explained.

“so can't it just ,,,,,, I don't know pop out of the ocean right into my arms?”

“if that's how it worked, do you think I would have entertained you all that long?”

“fine, you win,” you admitted, gritting your teeth

“dont hit your head on the rocks or drown like you did before–” he jabbered.

“you know ,,,,, I really miss two minutes ago when I didn't know your existence,” you retorted, as you dived into the water, missing the smirk on his face

After several minutes, you found the shell and you swam back to the silver haired boy

aND HE WAS SURPRISED AS FUCK?

“y-you found the shell?” he gulped

“yeah, why do you sound so panicky?” you asked, as you handed it to him, noticing the change in his tone

“nothing,” he scoffed. “I thought your intelligence quotient was so low that you would drown again,”

You only huffed in annoyance as you watched the gash on his leg disappear in an instant

“how did you get hurt anyway?”

“i was trying to save your dumbass from drowning.....”

he stood up and mans was taller than you

“the wound is fixed, the attitude comes right out huh?” you snapped.

“this isn't attitude, this is just–”

“no, you're just a jerk face” you interrupted, getting up.

Before you could utter another word, in one swift motion he grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards him

“first of all, it's not jerk face– it's Kang yeosang and second of all, I didn't have to injure myself just to save your petty ungrateful ass, but I still did.”

“well, god wanted me dead and now you get to find out why,” you managed to choke out, hoping he wouldn't notice how fAST YOUR HEART WAS RACING

He let go of your wrist as he rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time

“do you want to get back home or not?”

“yeah, so that I can forget your existence.”

He mumbled a ‘fine’ and jumped into the water

and you jumped after him

you could see his dark emerald green tail and as it came to the middle part, it become almost white, similar to his hair color

“hold on tight and pray that I don't strangle you,” he wrapped his arms around you and held you close to his chest

I mean ,,,,,, dude was a dick but he looked hELLA FINE AND YALL SEE HIS CHEST??

he swam at literal lightning speed like you were there before you even knew it??

the storm had passed and you could see lifeguards, friends and family on the shoreline

You were in still water, small waves here and there but nothing too strong

“the coast guard is going to come here for another round to search for you–pretend you're unconscious and just let your body float,” he instructed.

“what if I get only farther and farther away from the shore?” you asked and he rolled his eyes

“you need to stop asking me stupid questions ,,,,, and- I'll be here to supervise.”

“okay then um- thank you ,,,, yeosang.”

“you're welcome–” he let go of your body and you let your body float on the water, till you felt a boat near by, eventually taking you out of the water

you eventually pretended to regain consciousness and was happy to be reunited with everyone

you also got scolded by everyone but you felt as if something was missing

sure you didn't like yeosang but he still saved you and you just ,,,,, kinda liked having him around even if he was annoying

I mean he made your heart race and get you all giddy for some ,,,,,, reason

this incident happened a little over a month ago and you spent all your time missing yeosang?? even though you like barely knew him and he was a dick lol

you went back to the beach, without anyone around and just walked along the shoreline till you felt your foot hit something

it was emerald in color?

yeosang's shell??

was he in trouble?

you panicked internally because you hoped he was okay

you picked up the shell and looked around,

but you still couldn't see him

you saw a rather large rock so you decided to swim towards it in hopes of trying to spot him from the top

and you got there but unfortunately the rock was too steep and slippery and so you were trying to find an edge where you could get on top from

unaware that Yeosang was watching you struggle and grinning at your stupidity

“you do realize– I have been looking for that ,,,, every where,” you heard someone say, making your heart race and you ended up bumping into his chest ,,,,, again

“you dick– if you were here ,,,, why couldn't you help me?”

“sorry it was fun watching you struggle–” he smirked

“rude– but I found your shell so- are you okay?” you asked with geniuine concern

He sighed, “oh god- I have to tell you something....”

“what?”

“you see ,,,,, I had originally sent you on a wild goose chase when I sent you to find my shell–”

“what do you mean?”

“actually no one except the mermaids themselves can find their own shell,” he scratched the back of his head. “unless–” he paused.

“unless?”

“unless they are your significant other....”

[xxrat--punkxx]

JUMPING ON THIS BAND WAGGON

Ok here’s my 2020, tw//mentions of suicide and abuse

(Strong start lmao) 2020 sucked ass lemmi tell ya. This year was a fucking train wreck from the start, ur hay I got character development so who cares. Well let’s start with a review, bad things first.

Yall remember when everyone was scared shields of COVID?. Lol. But that’s stating the obvious. When we went into lockdown I was first like fuck yeah summer lol, but then the threat of ‘staying home for the rest of the year’ set in, bing in my first year of sixth form I really understand the stakes of exams next year. So having to stay home for the rest of the year freaked me the fuck out. I literally couldent cope, having to do all classes online was fucking hell, they were never zoom classes either, just ‘lmao do the work and hand it in’ which was near impossible for me. I was also in the constant ‘oh no I’m so stressed but I will do NOTHING about this lmao~’. As the days turned to weeks and inevitably MONTHS, my mental health said buckle up bitches. Days were spent sitting in my room on my phone doing NOTHING, meanwhile this perpetual notion of stress played in my head yet there I sat not having the will or motion to move.

Then my parents got involved. Now THATS when shit went from pretty crummy to awful, now I was living with them constantly I was able to see who they really were with no real filter. And oh god do I have issues, I didn’t even fucking know. Every day was an argument, my mom was the worst, the MANIPULATION, the constant ‘you're tearing this family apart’ or ‘so I’m the problem?’ Or the fucking indecent playing the victim. And I all only just realised, that they have been doing this ALL MY LIFE. Dad got involved but he was just physically violent, only twice tho. The worst part was my work, admittedly yes, I didn’t do everything I was given, but I tried, I really did with what little motivation I had. But with just one ‘oh your daughter hasn’t handed in this work’ I was a ‘lazy, good for nothing failure’ to quote ‘who will never go anywhere in life’ so I’d spend the rest of the day crying while they play the victim bury saupying I was abusing their love and just using them for money. But the next day be like ‘oh I’m so proud of you you're doing so well’ having that statement being completely unrelated to the previous events. This was constant. So that’s that story. I won’t talk much about Black Lives Matter because we all know about how that went. But it really affected me, I found myself crying over the victims multiple times. And the lack of support for the movement my peers or family showed made it fucking worse. Crying was a common occurrence for me now, mental health really taking a nosedive, being too scared to call myself ‘depressed’ or ‘mentally ill’ to any extent because I know I’m faking it and just want validation. That was also constant. Fun times huh.

BUT IT GETS WORSE 🥲, then I had to go back to school, awful to fucking abhorrent now. Year two of sixth form fun right? Sure, if u take away the ‘no free time period’ or the wanting to kill mystery for literally a whole 3 weeks. That was my lowest peak. Ever. I’ve never wanted to kill myself before then, don’t like that feeling. Shocker huh. That mixed with the constant anxiety of nothing is right anymore and also needing to succeed at school all made one healthy dose of ‘.exe has stopped working’ juice. Yet I played the fool, acting happy as if nothing had happened, or was happening at least, and venting by imagining scenes in my head with fictional characters lmao. Telling myself ’u can’t kill yourself because u don’t deserve too and ur just asking for attraction’. Then midterms happened blah blah blah, stress but I’m numb to it now that whole story.

But that’s not to say there wasn’t a silver lining.

Onto the good things finally, yes the year was probably one of the worst years I’ve been through in my life it did not go without its positives. For example early this year I got into borderlands properly, I finally explored the fandom and had a look at what it was like. Albeit a slow process considering I was still predominantly on Instagram at the time, and finding a community of a fandom on there is impossible. I started browsing Pinterest or the Internet for images that would link to my favourite characters, Who were to no ones surprise is the calypso twins. Pinterest led me to artworks and artworks led me to the infamous Lazulizard. Who I cherish all my being. Three weeks later after looking at her entire tumblr blog and stalking her of pretty much all her content (sorry for that by the way) I found border-spam. By this point I didn’t have tumblr and I had no intention of getting it seeing as an ongoing war I’ve had with myself since 2012, declaring I will be the bigger man and never get tumblr, which in hindsight was an awful mindset. Seeing as tumblr is probably one of my favourite places on Earth right now. But after also stalking border spams account, again sorry, and starving her of any content she’d ever posted. I was happy that this fandom although as niche as it is was actually getting content. At the time spam and lazu were absolute gods to me. Being the sole producer of a fandom I probably wasn’t even in properly, having both impeccable writing and impeccable art like good God. I would often think ‘wow wouldn’t it be incredible if I actually got to talk to them one day’, now look at me I’m doing commissions for both of them good God. And to be short joining tumblr felt like a fever dream and it’s probably the greatest thing I could’ve done this year, my parents are wrong, talking to strangers is amazing.

Something notable of mention this year as I actually got to figure out who I am as a person, I was able to find my own style and to find my interests, specifically in what I liked in terms of clothing. I thought I was LOL 2012 goth hipster but no apparently I’m manic Pixie dream girl. Going from pink is the ugliest colour in the world to having it be the only colour I will ever wear. I made some pretty big choices this year like cutting pretty much all of my hair off and dying it for the first time. Thanks strict parents for only letting me do that one now. But like I said I went to a character Ark and you know what I like it. I also played BioShock fallout and horizon zero dawn for the first time this year starting to really feel like a proper epic gamer, good lord kill me, and falling in love with all of them almost immediately. I also figured out on a plant mum and I’m into vulture culture although my parents have to disagree with that one. Asking to buy an Horse and fox skull somehow scared them a little bit can’t seem to figure out why lmao.

So a conclusion, Fuck you 2020 you made me miss two comic cons and I will never forgive you for that shit I am SO mad. But I will give you the benefit of the doubt you did make me meet some absolutely incredible people who I consider my friends, despite going against every single Internet safety law I was ever taught as a child. But you know what who gives a flying shit I love you guys. So that’s what I wanted to say. I want to say thank you to everyone on here and everyone is following me or even interacted me with on that matter. You mean the world to me and I really fucking mean it. Are you going to be nothing but amazing ever since I walked onto this fucking hell hole. And what I go through all of this bullshit again if it means I ended up here? You know what I think I just might. So again I thank you and I hope your year didn’t go as badly as mine, and fuck it bring on whatever the fucks next!

Honourable mention of this year was The time Elisa actually complimented me and I cried a little bit and had a panic attack but you know that’s for another day

🥺💕

[akitsune-lune]

Hey! I noticed you deleted the warriors-kingdoms Tumblr, so I can't actually access the big update you posted... I know you're leaving the fandom, I was just wondering if you'd be willing to post again to say why? If not, and you're not comfortable, that's fine. I was just curious

That's kind of. hilarious. LMAO. I'm so sorry yall I entirely forgot that deleting blogs makes the read-mores dead links. While it's tempting to just leave it, I'll post below what I wrote (and I won't delete akitsune-lune)

(quitting warriors + ditching wk)

They kind of explain each other, but to elaborate, when I was 12 I started writing a fanfiction some of you are familiar with, 'Tear Each Other Apart'. When I was about 15, I gave up on it because I had outgrown it to the point where it was unsalvageable.

Thus does history repeat itself.

I've enjoyed writing WK and if you've enjoyed reading it, thank you. Seriously. Y'know? Seriously. But I can't do it anymore.

I can't really continue to engage with Warriors as much as I have, because... as we all pretty much know by now, it's fucking shit. But it's shit to the point where now, as I continually loop in rewriting and character studies and watching the fandom cannibalize itself over minutiae, I'm realizing that I'm stagnating. I dropped TEOA when I started high school, and now that I'm in university, my writing is again evolving past what I had previously committed it to.

With WK specifically, I can't erase my history of complaining about a lack of attention, but I will acknowledge the dicey territory of demanding more eyes on something that is produced and consumed for free. The essential truth is that yes, if people had been more interested and engaged, my spark for it might have lasted longer (it still lasted 5 years, I don't want to downplay that), but at the same time, I wrote WK because I enjoyed writing it and people enjoyed reading.

Now, I don't enjoy writing it, and not enough people either enjoy it or want to make it visible that they enjoy it. This isn't like... a call-out, or a 'you could have done more'. This series has been dead for months now. This change is coming from me, not from the outside. Even if everyone loved it, I don't want to write it anymore. So that's that. Besides, if everyone did love it I would feel more guilty about dropping it. So I appreciate the comments and messages about it, but it's done.

I know this is probably not great news given that I said 'worst comes to worst, hiatus' but let's rip the band-aid off. It's over.

I've sunk 5 years of my life into it, and I'm grateful for what it's taught me, and you're welcome if you've liked it, but I literally do not have the time, energy, or will to carry on. As I write this, it's Tuesday, which means I woke up at 5am to go to work, got off at 12 in time to eat something and do my homework, then I had a class at 2 which ran until 5:30 (I had to eat dinner on zoom) before I went to another class (I was 10 minutes late as always because I can't physically get to class in the timeframe) and got home at 10. It's now 11pm.

This isn't a tale of "no more room for things that make me happy" because Warriors and WK do not make me happy.

I have moved out, got a job, and started university. There is not room in my life for Warriors or a 'hobby' I spend hours of effort on that increasingly feels like a chore. So! I'm calling it quits. It's been fun, and it's been not fun, but whatever it was, it's through now.

I have a half dozen stockpiled chapters, but those are going to rot in my drive because I don't have time to edit and publish them. I won't delete my fics, but I'm probably going to abandon my ao3 and fanfiction.net accounts.

See ya.

(for the last time)

~Akila

[colour-outside-the-liness]

Hey, I'm doing good too. Just normal amounts of stressful stuff right now. Just moved to a country I've never been to before but can't complain, things are not as hard as the last time I did this so. Thanks for asking! Yeah, I saw you posting about some pretty scary health issues before, I'm glad you came out of that alive and hope you're healthier now!

The nerve some people have! Haha I know I would be pissed if people were questioning my intelligence like that especially after a couple of drinks in haha. Though I do like taunting people when I play group games, I'll be like "don't need to try that hard guys, you're gonna lose anyway" just to mess with them or just call people sore losers if they accuse me of cheating haha (they're probably right on the accusations tho). People get real mad sometimes it's kinda funny. 😂

Omg literally laughed out loud reading this! Hahaha, how did you manage to fall over a road sign then end up in a ditch? lol omg hope you didn't get hurt too bad 😂 I was trying to downplay my drunken escapades but since you shared yours I should tell you my worst one:

I was at this summer street party at night and got drunk on something made out of tropical herbs and cachaça (which is about 48% alcohol), drank 3 and a half bottles of that like it was apple juice, made friends with a bunch of strangers in a bathroom queue (who tried to talk to me weeks later but I had no idea who they were), had to be held by my best friend while I peed (mostly missing the toilet), fell in the middle of the street and scraped my knee, threatened this boy who was helping me walk and told him not to try anything funny or I would beat him up, then dragged my friends to the beach and left them shortly after to go make out with my ex, came back with lipstick all over my mouth and chin and when my friends asked what I was doing I said I was just talking to my ex and they were like NO YOU WERE NOT, hahaha then I kissed all my girl friends on a dare and we danced under the full moon, then I told my best friend I had to puke so she took me to the ocean but I changed my mind and happened to step on a dead turtle on the way back and started crying bc of it, but last month my best friend told me it was a rock I had stepped on (I believed it was a dead turtle for 7 years!). Had the worst hangover of my life the next day. ✌️✨

Ah I'm happy you liked it! I've never listened to Six musical before but it sounds fun! I can see why you like it haha made me want to dance around my apartment 💃. And hey if liking musicals is your thing then it's great, I'm sure Hozier will understand if he's not your top artist of the year. 😋 Here's my "damie" Pinterest board if you or anyone else wants to check it out, totally recommend making one if you're a visual person like me!

https://pin.it/UcHVlkq

Oh I could talk about Dani and Jamie forever I think. I love the beast in the jungle speech too and it's so painful to watch, VP delivered that beautifully, but I have to admit I'm always a crying mess from episode 1 when older Jamie starts reciting that song about being sad while waiting for her lover to return, this show is fucking cruel I hate it and love it at the same time hahaha. Omg your mom 😂 but I mean it's truly an honor to be compared to someone like Dani, no? She's really great even if she needs a little help haha (don't we all).

Aaah you're amazing! Thank you so much, I'll read this pirate AU soon!

I used to draw a lot, really loved doing it when I was a kid as I said before, and all throughout adulthood too but I haven't done that in almost a year now bc I've got a bit of a case of burnout I guess, it just takes a lot of effort to do it when it shouldn't be like that at all. I used to do fanart too, for other fandoms. Even made one for Dani x Jamie but ended up not liking how it turned out haha. I've got a lot of respect for writers and fanfic writers also! Yall can make words make sense in really interesting and beautiful ways, build worlds so enthralling I can see them vividly in my head. Writing is such an incredibly fascinating skill to have! And I guess the most important thing is that we enjoy doing these things right? Even if we think we're not particularly good at it.

Anyway, have a lovely weekend! 👋✨

Good I'm glad you're doing great but sorry you're dealing with stressful stuff!! Hope living in a new country goes well for you I'm so jealous that you've lived in different countries I'd love to live somewhere else even if just for s few years!! Awwh thank you so much I definitely came out of it alive and am feeling so much better now thank you I mean I do some pretty ditzy things so when people say it to me it's pretty deserved sometimes, I'm secretly smart and people just don't expect it so I never mind too much haha I might have to start saying the things that you do and just taunting them over it I mean, I usually do win even when they make me answer different questions so I will definitely have to start saying things like that to them Haha I love that you're just like "yeah they're probably right in their accusations" I agree seeing how mad some people get over games and stuff is funny (it's me I'm people I hate loosing games depending on what it is and I am very competitive) So it was very dark and all we had for light was my roommates flashlight on her phone but while we were walking home a friend of ours that lived else where kept texting her to make sure we were still safe (my phone as dead at this point) so while she was texting him her flashlight was facing down and someone had moved this road sign to the footpath and it was on that sits on the floor so while I couldn't see it I walked into it and fell over it but while I feel I grabbed hold of it and flipped with it and fell in a ditch with it on top of me... I was fine and was just laid laughing while my friend looked down at me and in the most northern accent ever just said "get up you dickhead." and helped me off of the floor and then asked if I was okay... and I was so it was all good!! Haha 😂 I love this drunken story that sounds like one hell of a night and is a roller coaster from start to finish!! I'm sorry you thought you had stood on a dead turtle for 7 years though, someone really should've told you that it was just a rock!! But that sounds like my kind of night!! I love nights like that... stories that will last a life time... the only down side is the hangover... luckily I have only ever had one hang over in my life and it wasn't the morning after the road sign fiasco... I felt surprisingly good the morning after that haha 😂 It's such a good musical it's about Henry VIII wives and I just love everything to do with his wives and that musical is so much fun and actually gives a little insight to the lives the six Tudor queens had away from Henry and with him because at school we're mainly just taught about him which sucks!! I loved the Hozier song and am definitely gonna have to listen to more of his stuff!! I love musicals so much I mainly listen to musical soundtracks at the minute- usually, Legally Blonde and Six on repeat haha 😂 Ooo thank you I will definitely check out this Pinterest board thanks for sending it to me!! I could talk about them forever too... since watching Bly Manor my niece has been asking me so many questions about it and I am more than happy to talk to her about it haha!! The beast in the jungle speech just breaks my heart every time I relate to it so much and VP just delivers it so beautifully!! Oh yeah now I know at the beginning that it's older Jamie I am just a wreck the whole show is just so beautiful and heart breaking at the same time I LOVE IT!! Even though it makes me sob- I keep putting myself through it!! I mean, yeah I was happy that she said it Dani is great but it was the way she said it... my mum can be something else sometimes... she said she thought Dani was like me the first time she does the accent when she says "I've fallen quite in love with London" because I just randomly do accents a lot too but it was the way she was like "She needs help... but I like her she reminds me of you" I was just like... "Should I go get help?" I still don't know the answer to my question about if I need help or not but I mean I probably do need it You're welcome I really hope you like it!! It's a

great fic I love it!! Yeah I get that if stuff starts taking too much effort and burns you out you're not gonna wanna keep doing it so it's understandable that you stopped!! I think fan art is great and I really would love to be able to do it myself but I just don't have the skill it takes!! Awwh it's a shame you didn't like the Dani x Jamie one you did I would've loved to have seen it!! Honestly there are so many talented writers out there and when I read their fics I am just in awe of the worlds they have built and the stories they have created we are so blessed in this fandom to have so many amazing writers and so many amazing fics out there Oh yeah definitely its important to enjoy what you do!! I know I love writing and love writing fics for Dani and Jamie so I think I'll be doing it for a while even if I'm not great at it haha Awwh thank you very much I hope you have a great weekend too!! ☺️

[yeehawclem]

this au is fantastic and i love literally everything abt it. i'm curious whether u have anything planned for lee? hope you're having a great day :)

Thank u that means a lot. And hell yeah I got a plan for Lee, everyone has some sort of subplot going on so ye let's get right to it then

Lee shit 🤠

Is a family friend of Ed and Diana (clems parents), they go way back

Ed and Lee grew up together basically

Diana met Lee when they were teens (when her n Ed first started dating)

And when Lee went to jail Ed still kept in touch with him

Instead of killing the state senate in canon he just like. Beats him up or summin? He gets like 3 years in prison with parole idk lol

Anyway Lee is basically in prison for like. A small fraction of Clementine's life (he got released during S2 section of the au plot)

When he got released, Ed and Diana welcomed him with open arms into their home, since his family basically disowned him for what he's done. Clem got to see her uncle Lee again and she showed him her new baby brother AJ whom they've just adopted

He loved it there, with his best friends his best friend's kids

It was...nice, especially after being a cell for so long.

He got back on his feet surprisingly quickly, working at a grocery store for a bit

He doesn't stay in the marsh resident for long tho, he gets a cozy apartment a few minutes outside of Atlanta and has started teaching at a local highschool (they rlly be letting anyone teach huh)

His neighbor from across the hall is Carley! The reporter who covered his case in court n stuff!

They hit it off and he makes quick friends with her lil social group (basically the motor inn gang)

Lee really likes her, so he goes to the only person he can count on for advice: Clementine

Nah jk Clem goes to him and asks him why he's so weird around Carley and if he wants to do 'kissing stuff' with her

Then she turns into his dating coach of some kind

Lee's not sure if this 11 year old child can help him score a date with a middle aged reporter lady but clems a professional (or so she claims)

Turns out she does know what she's talking about! Carley accepted his date request and pecked him on the cheek. Clem (watching from the bushes) cheered and her n Lee celebrated

After some more dates, kisses and lots of awkward flirting they were finally a couple

They dated for like some years before Lee finally proposed (with the help of Clem again)

They get married when Clem is like 13 and is one of Lee's groomsmen (because Clem in a suit fuck you)

And they lived happily ever after the end

(No wait I still have more nvm) Lee is clems history teacher in highschool (pre- ericsons) and is kinda like the Cool Teacher amongst the kids for being a "scary prison guy" or whatever

He uses the kids attention to his advantage by teaching the Cool Histories (and they actually listen!)

Him, Kenny, and Ed are like. Those Middle Aged Men Who Like To Kick Back and Have A Beer.

Taught duck in history and everytime he asked a genuinely stupid question his hairline receded by a centimeter

Here he is! Sorry it took a while for me to pop this boy out I've been doing school work at home. We love Corn Teen time.

Lee's life is kinda like a romcom it's great. How would yall feel if I started writing little drabbles of my au once in a while?

[biaoba]

Could write essays about how those posts about anti-intellectualism will ultimately never achieve anything because the whole movement is inherently about embracing the insecurity of being stupid and actively on purpose avoiding anything that could challenge you out of the fear you won't get it and idk about the rest of them but im definitely aware of that as im tongue-in-cheek bragging about only ever reading fanfiction. We can't even attempt to solve this by weaponising reverse psychology cringe culture (which is the only thing that works on me) because "oh, NOT reading shakespeare is cringe" is exactly the type of elitist bullshit we're afraid of and "reading shakespeare IS cringe" is what we've already assimilated into our world belief so really we're fucked. In the same vein "art is SUPPOSED to challenge you and make you feel emotions that arent always positive" is like the worst thing to say to me like i do NOT want to feel emotions art is SOLELY about escapism for me likee... Life genuinely not worth living lately and im supposed to use up my 4 hours of free time daily to ENGAGE in MORE problems??????? I dont know what world yall are living in but Im not doing all of that luv xx.. And while im at it ps art means nothing to me (#edge) and i think that shit BEGAN in middle school reading comprehension class like oh i have to ACTIVELY seek out the meaning of curtains are blue? Blue=sad and other metaphors are something that is TAUGHT and not INHERENT hence NOT A GOOD METAPHOR???? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 HMMMMMMMMM almost as if when I'm consuming a piece of art/media if I'm actively THINKING about its meaning the author kinda FAILED to get across the intended message subtly and naturally enough like if you're creating something and ACTIVELY TRYING to put in a moral message or themes it's FAKE AND GAY ASFF and i dont fuck with it!!! Literally preschool level fable bullshit!!!!!!! If i understood it i understood it, if i didn't i didsnt like IM TIREDDDDDD

[handgunz]

Also, no hate from that. I just like debating. You're argument actually made me go rewatch a few pieces of some episodes.

I’m going to go through each of your arguments that you submitted. 

I’m going to go with the stereotypical answer of “Everyone reacts to trauma differently”, but hear me out. This argument is based on the assumption that Killua viewed his upbringing as “traumatic”. From what we have seen, this is far from the case. Yes, he is aware that it’s messed up and not the “norm” for other families, but it was the “norm” for him.

When it comes to trauma it doesn’t matter whether you think it was traumatic or not (when we’re talking about the long-run and subliminal/subconscious behaviors). Your behavior will be affected regardless. 

There are many, many people with PTSD or battered person syndrome who downplay their experiences or don’t even acknowledge them as traumatic whatsoever. Recognizing that trauma was, well, trauma is the first step to recovery. But knowing that what you went through is traumatic isn’t a requirement for the symptoms linked to the trauma itself. Part of the reason why people actually end up going to a therapist is because they have signs of those symptoms even if they haven’t acknowledged the event that caused them was traumatic: flashbacks, self destructive behavior, nightmares, etc. 

Also, there is a certain threshold of pain that pushes your sanity in general and electrocution can definitely take you to that point whether you acknowledge it as normal or not. Even if Killua believes on a conscious level that it was the norm, on a subconscious/primal level people have reflexes or intrusive thoughts that would be stationed there after being tortured to that type of extent. You know when people talk about how their parents used to hit them, so whenever someone would raise their hand for a high-five they would cower or suddenly flinch, jump, or they would seem a little panicked? It’s the exact same thing. Still, there was no effort put into these types of small details when it comes to Killua’s character. 

We see in the Zoldyk Family arc that despite being trained to not feel empathy, Killua is trying to make to make friends (specifically in the flashback with Canary). He differs from his siblings because he has the natural inclination to actually want friends (specifically his own age). When he meets Gon, it comes off as passive curiosity (perhaps a little bit of envy as well) at first. Here’s this kid that’s not only his age, but can also keep up with him during the exam. This kid also is like a ray of sunshine and has friends surrounding him.

No offense but if you are literally trained from birth to feel zero empathy and you’re forced to murder people then it’s pretty damn ooc to try and make friends and empathize with other people. I don’t think you’re really understanding how heavy the weight of killing other people is as well as what that can do to you as a person, it doesn’t even matter if it’s normalized. That kind of radical behavior instilled in you as a child changes you. It alters you. You, and the rest of the fandom, aren’t understanding that you don’t come out of a childhood as brutal and violent as Killua’s with the desire to “make friends.” It just doesn’t work that way.  

Killua was a killer, a murderer. In that type of environment, the empathy is literally cut out of you. There is also no real given reason as to why Killua is the only person in his family who differs and has empathy which doesn’t make sense. If he’s the heir and if his family wanted to make him cold-blooded and ruthless, they would’ve done it. Your point is great when we’re putting all realism aside but we aren’t. The whole point of the post that I wrote was “hey if things were actually realistic for 2 seconds in Hunter x Hunter then how would Killua have really been impacted by his past?”

The case with Bodoro was not due to dissociation. Killua was under Illumi’s control at the time, which also makes sense as to why we don’t see anything similar throughout the story. Killua doesn’t interact with him until he returns for Alluka (at this point, Illumi can’t manipulate him anymore).

Dude… Bodoro’s death was like a single tiny example of how dissociation could look like and how the show would have been better if Killua had more scenes resembling that one where he’s dissociated. It wasn’t even one of my points.

I went on to say: “if Killua did have issues with dissociation, he should have had more times when he would have dissociated to that level during certain times of stress (perhaps feeling trapped against stronger enemies would have been a perfect time to trigger that type of dissociation).” There was no argument that you gave for that. 

On the contrary, I think this shows who Killua is under the control of Illumi vs who is he without being controlled by Illumi. Bisky points out that Killua’s anxiety was a product of overbearing love, which isn’t wrong. Illumi placed the needle in Killua to protect him (good intentions, poor execution). Which leads me to believe that Killua did not have thehesitation when facing stronger opponents, despite the years and years of training and conditioning that taught otherwise.

Also, after removing the needle, while he does gain much more confidence, he doesn’t quite do a complete 180. He still has enough common sense to knock Gon out and get the hell out of dodge when they’re faced with Pitou.

You are completely missing the entire point. 

I never said the needle scene was a bad scene in general. I never said any of the panicked scenes with Killua were bad. The topic of the whole post was as follows: “My problem with Killua Zoldyck is that I personally believe that his response to the trauma from his family isn’t portrayed as significantly as it should be.” The reason why the needle scene with Illumi fucking sucks is because Killua’s insecurity…had nothing to do with his upbringing…it was a result of the needle that was taken out and suddenly it was all better and he felt no anxiety like before when it came to challenging stronger opponents. 

Instead of his self esteem and terror regarding larger foes being a problem that could be worked through, it was taken away in an instant and like I said, it had nothing to do with his upbringing. That’s the main problem. 

I don’t even know what you’re trying to say or what you’re trying to counter because I’m pretty sure you misunderstood what I said. 

Also saying he “didn’t really do a 180″ is absolute nitpicking. Obviously he didn’t become the literal opposite of what he was before, a 180 is a figure of speech. I was trying to say that there was no linear or visual progression between: 

> losing his fucking shit while going against Rammot

> and being completely confident against every single damn Chimera Ant fight after Rammot 

Also, full offense but “He still has enough common sense to knock Gon out and get the hell out of dodge when they’re faced with Pitou” is a trash point considering Killua knocked Gon out in Episode 85 and Killua actually tore the needle out in Episode 94. 

So. 

Yeah. 

This goes back to my point stating that there are points in Killua’s past that show his training (at least the emotional side of it) didn’t take as well as his family wanted it too. Him running away from home in the first place is a prime example of this. He even says that he didn’t want his entire life planned out for him. Problem child? Absolutely.

Reread what I said in response to your second point. It’s pretty much the same response and I don’t feel like copy-pasting it again just to make this post longer. 

However, if you look at the timeline of these things occurring, you’ll notice that Killua still hadn’t completely acknowledged that he wanted to be Gon’s friend. At this point, it was still kind of a “Oh, you’re neat. I’m going to see how this plays out” type of thing. The more he is around Gon, the more he wants to be “worthy” of his friendship.

In conclusion, it all comes down to the fact that despite how many of us would react to growing up as Killua did, there are plenty of situations that one person would see as traumatic, but the one actually living it is completely adjusted to the situation. It’s just how things are. Just because it is pointed out by several other characters in HxH how horrible Killua’s upbringing must’ve been, doesn’t mean Killua is scarred from it.

I think I’m frustrated now that I’m at the end of this because you completely missed almost all the points I was trying to say. Also I think “Just because it is pointed out by several other characters in HxH how horrible Killua’s upbringing must’ve been doesn’t mean Killua is scarred from it” might be the saddest thing I’ve read all day. 

Because I literally never ever said that Killua is scarred from his past. 

In fact the entire point of the damn post was that Killua wasn’t scarred and he should have been because realistically if you’re raised in a household full of a bunch of assassins who force you to murder people and torture you with electrocution, beatings, and God knows what else for over a decade then you would be scarred. Killua was clearly not as scarred as any actual human being would have been after coming out of that situation. 

You can’t be like “well it’s debatable if you would get scarred or not haha” because that’s complete and utter BS. It’s just not realistic in any aspect? Like I said, even if you completely dismiss everything else that happened to Killua and just settle on the fact that he was electrocuted for years during his childhood you can’t say that someone wouldn’t be traumatized from that. 

Do yall even do research on electrocution torture? 

Do yall even know how numbingly painful that is? 

Electrocution torture alone has the capacity to give you brain damage, and straight from Killua’s wiki it says: “As a child, Killua was trained to endure large amounts of electricity. His older brother Milluki often electrocuted him for training and punishment. As a result, he is able to withstand high-voltage electrical currents while retaining his full mental and physical faculties.” It says “high-voltage” and in the first sentence it says “trained to endure large amounts of electricity.” 

I can’t believe yall are gonna tell me with a straight face that a human child being electrocuted and tortured wouldn’t be mentally scarring. That’s so wild. 

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

I hear two Atlanta Police Officers with missing vehicles called the Mayor and apologized to her for thinking of only themselves, admitted they were afraid that if they were in the same situation they would been fired as the other two in the Rayshard Brooks case and they couldn't allow that to happen to,themselves and the community so they wanted to show what would happen if it did because like me they all saw it as a justified homocide, a honorable weapon's discharge.

But after reading what i wrote last night. They fully regrret their decision and would like to have a meeting with her today, the entire 25 that stayed home for 3 days and they will all drive up to see her, in their personal cars of course.

Of course they got her mussing her mascara and all. Weeping she is. Don't mean she's weak. Just means she knows love. And she knows how evil attacks it and makes love so painful.

... ...

I mean I'm real surprised at Atlanta. I never had any problems with them they was always "The Next New Orleans" i called them.

Always just witchy with it. Good and a skip ahead.

So besides my anger at the situation created...

Look. I come straight outta the 90s.

Back then... Man. Our history been lost in 30 years. Our soul soul soul filled history. Its gone. It ain't there.

Back in the 90s we had about a 15 year break. From the protests from Vietnam War. Love not War Protests. We had them nice little 1950s with "Hello Technology: introduction to the TV" ONWARD to the "60s Hippies. Make love not War" taking it right onto the 70s which came back with the Civil Rights

So our 90s. Y'all they were the most beautiful. They were the combo of the 60s and 70s.

The riots and protests being taught to me and we made it big as we could with all the best parts of being a Human Rights Activist with brand new only 1990s fluorescent neon dripped could bring in.

That was all lost. Its all gone.

But the fight. The rights. THE TRUTH we went all 1950s and stayed in and raised our kids right. People wanna say shit about the Millennials. But we spoke truth. We spoke from our heart and we let them find,the truth as safe as possible and form their own opinions based on truth alone.

So now people wanna beat our kids. People i went to high school with they got high school graduates. Mine will be 17 this August. Real honest to God birthday and age.

Those are my babies. Our babies. They are our future. In 50 years they're gonna be like old man Bernie Sanders. 70 years old bent over fighting because we're gonna be near dead at 90 and more.

And people neglect and beat and ...

Man Our kids got it bad enough already. Simply because THEY KNOW THE TRUTH.

And man we got to protect them. Protect their hearts. Their minds. Their souls.

And they getting allllllll this stress. Put on them. Stress that is simply avoided.

By one dancing in the streets.

By 15 officers stating their badge numbers.

By the police owning up to who they are and why they exist.

Don't they want peace? Used to be they were called Peace Keeping Officers.

Now they called Lice Officers. Coming in on Native American Reservations claiming unwashed hair bread bugs. Let me tell you something. My daughter and I got lice a while back.. Like 8 years. The only thing that killed them was coating our hair in oil

Lice breath through holes in their exobody. So the oil makes them suffocate to death and die. Furthermore people whom smoke reject lice more frequently than those that don't. It takes me 3 months longer to get lice than a non smoker.

Peace pipe anyone?

.

So historically police aren't loved. They aren't wanted.

Being a police or military. It becomes a color of our skin. I'll post a tattoo that isn't finished being colored or lined. It's not done. I'll show you we can balance it.

Get out of your comfort zone. Step out of your skin.

We can't stop being black. We can't stop being what drives us to be police.

But we can control it.

"BURN ALL THEIR FUCKING CARS" demanded the international head of the CIA.

"No ma'am. This is what we did" they didn't tell me No before. They just did it. Because they knew it was better. They knew it would cause all 25 of y'all to have to stand up and say "my car is missing. This is how i feel. I do/don't want it back"

Where yall can't pretend what y'all did didn't matter and just get up and go to work the next day. All sneak in and get back to business.

No. You got a fucking problem. You forcing others to take on your load, Zone 5.

Were not walking away and being all its fine what ever. You got a problem. We need to tackle it in a for real state.

Foooorrrrr Reeeaaaalllll state.

You got a problem in your mind? Those become tangible. They aren't floating thoughts. They are what makes us do what we do.

Make it concrete. Take away their cars.

I ain't saying the charges will be dropped. That's all a whole other issue. I don't work in the justice system. Court. Law. I tell you how to win in court. But i ain't about telling some DA how to shove it. I just sue them. When its courts. I fight their game. With paperwork and all that shit. So like i said that's not on me to say the charges will be dropped.

When it's a basketball game you use a ball and circle to drop the ball in.

Use proper tools

Atlanta PD could and should said "alright let's picket the DA. Lets go in uniform. Leave our weapons in the car. Unbutton our shirts. Put red paint on our foreheads to show where they're hurting us. Show them the DA now made us defense less and stripped"

Half hour. 10 minutes. 2 hours. Don't matter. As long as you make that statement.

NYPD did that.

Sure i can ask Tree, tree why ain't you posted that? Taught them?

But why didn't NYPD pull out thier hands and say NBC, FOX. Where's them videos of what we use to do and so we can stop and make this shit right in the streets?

Thata all i did. That's all im doing now. Yeah I'm,the most brilliant and all

But the last since November i been telling y'all "shake them tail feathers"

How is Gary Trump's brother going into human trafficking for 24 years to be found by me. Then murdered by his brother that took his name and lied about who he was? And his brother didn't care. He said "ill go by Gary. It don't matter. Hes worked hard under my name"

How is the ACTUAL Donald Trump not allowed to be in a Black Lives Matter movement? How come no one is shaking their tail feathers to a man killed by the government for greed and white power?

The faux Donald Trump that is our impeached President is a racist.

So why isn't his brother being named? Black Lives Matter.

One person says "Let's Shake Our Tail Feathers".

Dont matter if you believe me. Its the movement. Quite literally.

Its confusing and alive and can make us all sick. It is its own plague. "Shake ya tail feathers" it's a mental plague if you refuse truth.

Regardless how i named it. I still taught it and spoke it. And led y'all to dance it.

Bye bye stress. Bye bye human trafficking.

Bye bye inequality.

Instead it's crazy

It was already planned to be crazy. Burning down buildings calling them Liberty Torches.

Civil Rights . Civil Liberties . take No Justice/Fairness and make it a sight to behold.

Is it fair to me financially to burn down my own economicially profiting legally businesses to make a Park and Garden where you can get fresh and,free vegetables and fruit for life? HELL FUCKING NO.

I got to pay security and taxes and i don't get a single domestic dime in return.

Kids go play on my slides and swings and wear them out having too much dam fun. Then i gotta spend More Money to make sure i am making sure they even get a single second to know what fun is.

I spent my whole life working. Every dam day.

One day I went out and I was 18 years old and i heard laughter. And i didn't know what it was. What made people laugh? How could people even be happy? Or want to laugh?

I was 18 years old. Didn't under stand a human thing.

And it just kept going and going and going. I wanted it to stop. I wanted to do whatever it took. And I didn't know why. Because i got my car keys out and opened my car door the second time that day. This time to make it stop. I put my car key between my fingers. Next thing i knew, I was sitting back down. And starting the car. Obviously my mom knew I was crazy with worry. And lost my mind. Shoved my ass back in the car and said "no you're just gonna leave and leave those innocent people alone"

I was so angry and bitter. And now my life is even worse.

If I couldn't attack them people. No one else can attack innocent people in public.

I don't care how fucked up you are. YOU CAN'T ATTACK SOMEONE FOR THEIR FREEDOMS.

Laughter. Black Lives Matter. Blue lives MATTER. All lives MATTER.

Some ignorant fool was arguing with a store clerk saying how her Black Lives Matter sign offended him

Watch me, #BLM #BLM ONE OF THOSE IS BLACK. ONE OF THOSE IS BLUE. TOGETHER WE ARE BRUISED BLACK AND BLUE.

Why can't y'all see and accept that?

We can't we be one. One truth.

One life to live

I can't live as Cleopatra or anyone of my past lives. I can't even live the life I led in the 90s. I can't even walk

We have one life to live and this is it.

So do we kill each other? Or do we protect each other?

Why aren't we being One?

When you're alone you can think of only you. You realize how important you are. We all need alone time.

When im with you i can only think about how important you are.

There isn't enough room in my brain to say how important we both are at the same time unless we do and think and act the same way all day long. Even for twins and clones its impossible.

So in my brain and in yours. You can only think about how much ONE life matters at a time.

ONLY ONE LIFE IN THIS WORLD MATTERS. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?!

We. Our. Us. You can't stop a great combination.

Power and love = unified. Unity. United.

Watch me, #BLM #BLM ONE OF THOSE IS BLACK. ONE OF THOSE IS BLUE. TOGETHER WE ARE BRUISED BLACK AND BLUE.

Stop the pain. Hold our hands. Let the love flow. Let the Heart speak until it sings.

So yesterday old Blackfeet and Regina didn't see each other for the DUMBEST thing. She said "oh baby ill move in the nursing home with you"

He says something all "nonsense that's dumb shut up" all Grumpy Bear.

I don't even want to be with you.

So i talked to Michael about their unique situation.

He could had said "I'm well enough to move into a regular home with you. We don't need the nursing home. I moved to (US state) to be with you. To be close to you because you mean more to Me than Anything in the world. And you deserve a big ole castle. Because i love you and we gotta do all this best and right. No nursing home. We got another 50 years plus i wanna be doing you on the kitchen table and not here. All I can smell is stinky old man diapers from the neighbor"

And she could said had he continued the fight "oh idk what I'm saying I've never even seen the nursing home. Do you mind i come visit you there? Id really like that"

It would taken ONE. Only one to stop their ninny war.

And they would been holding each other. With love.

Instead of living in Hell.

So, now what happened was we put it all on old dad. Because hes the Black Beethoven who can suddenly sing a ballad of symphony in the midst of telling some real bad history truth.

Then moments later Regina said "well i could said something different, too".

It takes two to tango.

So I challenge y'all to punch inequality in the face. BLM. there is no difference between.

Black. Blue. Red. Purple. Yellow. Green. All bruises.

Challenge each other. Black and blue.

Force it. There is no difference and it must be seen.

Chant it. Turn on the "Boombox" and dance together. Dance if some won't. But do it in their face.

Laugh. Be happy. In their face.

If they're bitter like an 18 year old me and don't have a Angel Mommy to bust their ass back down into a sitting position. Someone will beat the shit out of them. Someone will stop them and i Will go after them and send you services for legal and medical. Free.

Acknowledge.

You are hurt. I am hurt.

Lets Live. Lets be happy.

Lets try. Trying makes perfect.

"MOVE BACK"

"TAKE THAT FIRST STEP"

"MOVE BACK"

"SEE WE ARE HURT SAME AS YOU" point out the ones that have fear. The ones that try to intimidate. -- The I Can See You -- let them scream in your face youre nothing but a piece of shit. And yell back they're someone inside a police uniform. And you can see it.

Beat their asses like fucking Care Bears.

Teach you a little photography. 1. Dirty lens. Dry skin. 2. Lotions the skin. Hannibal lectur. 3. Cleans the lens. 4 & 5 close up with flash. 6&7 close up without flash.

After meeting some kids in college. Native Americans from tribes near Gallup. Very very. Very Racist.

I began to question my life long believe of how I could live with being a military based person. And being an Native American.

I didn't know. I just knew i could and it wasn't fair to me to destroy the very being of me. Simply because it don't make sense without actual factual historical documents.

Remember Oregon Trail was First. That made Atlas.

Then down the coast to find gold. So NM DONT KNOW SHIT ABOUT NO FUCKING TRAIL OF TEARS SO GET OUT MY FACE.

And so my owl... Its every thing. I didn't design it normal. It has wings that are out stretched yes.

But it has a secomd pair of wings. Which are pins from the United States Coast Guard. Those wings are like hands. To do things close by to the body.

Its slightly designed after a Hindu God. She has 6 arms.

Here the wings are keeping the body warm and safe and sound.

How could myself own an owl to represent my secret past of S.Leigh if it can't have hands to represent both my heart and mind?

There figlirliee on the head. That's not for me. Its because I think about you. The mass population of Earth.

I need more simply than what the Earth can provide in the reality of which exists on Earth.

There's an hour glass of water on it's side, traveling... My baby bird is flying with an hour glass.

If you look. You'll see a woman under and between the two shields. And she has "duck lips"

For the real "Not Gary Donald Trump"

Her lips are actually a heart. But they look off..

A rose each sits above the shields. A diamond in the midst of the tail feathers.

No piece

No area.

Is just a feather. A stroke of color.

Each is an item. There's no nothing. It is all something

The military did not just beat us and we took it as Muscogee Creek Nation. We built an Atlas. Recivejed the City of Atlantis -- the Spain sent supplies to help us for years. All the way from Florida.

There was Something. It all wasn't nothing

Or for nothing. Everyone looks for the truth. Looks for the Lost City of Atlantis and i am the one who sunk it. Because I am the Goddess.

The diamond has a purple eye. Diamonds are the hardest and toughest known substance.

Well i know my mind is gonna cut you and rip you apart from what I've seen. So my eyes are like diamonds. My mind

Our tounges are diamonds. We can slash each other apart.

Or we can acknowledge the riches we have.

My Ultimate Challenge is for the police to create a barricade when necessary. No weapons in hand. Hands on the top of their heads and chant BLM Bruises are the same.

We know black bruises hurt the worst, the same level as red.

Then purple. Then blue. Green and yellow rarely do.

So please fight blindness and inequality with me.

And please post it on the national news and international news. So that we know as a world we all fight together

Whether it's in the couches or in the streets.

Thank you for trying.

[comedicreliefonlyworkswhenfunny]

The way he treated Alex was really shitty, and idk if Pepper gets better or worse in the next few chapters, but man every fucking character with Pepper in it automatically had so much fucking hate in the top comments like...

Guys wtf?

This dude has literally just been chasing the affection his parents never gave him and projecting his self hatred onto his brother who got all the love that he was denied.

Yeah, sending Claude back to the Cat Kingdom knowing it had met its ruin was pretty rude, but he did so in order to?? Feel affection??

I don't even like Pepper. I haven't. I've wanted to punch his stupid face from the first time he showed up, but all of yall in the comments saying that he's "irredeemable" and "a monster" are so fucking

You get mad at him for not acknowledging his past, but when he tries to apologize to Francis, you're all hoping for his downfall.

Like you get mad at him for being a broken child who grew up twisted... and then you actively deny him of the things that he needs to grow and be a better person, and I just??

Really?? Why is this such a popular fucking trend??

Yeah, Pepper trying to buy Francis's forgiveness is rude as shit, but he literally doesn't know any better.

Him pushing her, despite her telling him to stop is >:/ I wouldn't say inexcusable, but it's not fucking good, but he's been ditched and thrown aside by people countless times.

He shouldn't have pushed. She shouldn't have pushed back.

Is anyone yelling at Francis for not knowing that Pepper was practicing sorcery in order to gain the acknowledgement and affection of his absent parents? No, because that doesn't excuse that what he did that night hurt her.

Sooo why yell at Pepper for once again trying his absolute damndest to earn affection in the only ways that he knew how? (Being pushy, bribing, guilt tripping) He was literally pushed off to the side his entire life. His parents refused to give him affection, he was exiled as a child- given a glimpse of unconditional love- and then ripped from that right back into a place of abandonment and hopelessness. He comes back years later to find out that the man who (in his eyes) stole his love from their parents and ripped him from the only home that ever loved him, had once again taken away his ability to be loved (by telling Bonnie about Pepper's past and why he was exiled to begin with).

Chapters one thirty five and one thirty six are a little bit confusing? With the layout, because we get a few panels of Pepper talking to Alex, and Alex is telling him that he needs to acknowledge his past (go Alex, MVP), and that he will help Pepper start anew by promising to be by his side (you know, how traumatized people need a support system).

While we also have Pepper apologizing to Francis and it going terribly, because kid's never been taught any fucking boundaries or how to take no as an answer :/

But we also have Pepper turning on Alex, saying that Bonnie (the only unconditional love he had ever been given) changed, so why should he trust Alex? And in the second chapter, even going to far as to threaten Alex for trying to get him to reach out, so either:

Pepper threatened Alex, but decided to apologize anyway

Or Pepper failed the apology before meeting up with Alex, and was lashing out because he did try to ask for forgiveness and was shot down.

Which is a little confusing going forward, but the chapters before that don't have the same excuse, because Pepper was literally just doing everything he could to be loved :/

So I made the mistake of reading comments again, and can we please agree that people (especially fucking characters) can change??

And that, while trauma does not excuse someone's actions, it does give them a reason, and that until that trauma is dealt with, they are not able to become better people???