#Like god I thought this show already jumped the shark when they did the time travel or gave Aviva and Koki suits but no
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kaythefloppa · 9 months ago
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Ok so I just watched Our Blue and Green World on the Video App and I do not have enough time to post my disjointed thoughts about it, and I'm frankly too much in shock by the whole thing to even say anything more. I will point out my one main thought since in a couple of hours, this is going to absolutely blow up the main WK tag and I want to get it off my chest before any major bandwagons hit. This'll be my last S7 spoiler related post for the night so I can log off and take a breather after what the fuck I just watched. Blue-whale/Amazon rainforest sized spoilers under the cut.
I am in such disbelief over this episode's ending. I'm not angry or fuming at the fact that they redeemed Paisey Paver after only giving her 7 appearances over the course of 8 years, (or maybe I'm too surprised to have any straight-forward) or the fact that they had the balls to do so, for ANY of the main villains, but I'm just.... bargaining here. They did a similar "hint" at the villains redeeming in the Christmas special only for it to be a fake-out. And in other episodes, we've seen the heroes legitimately help the villains, but through means other than redeeming them (i.e. saving Zach's life and trying to convince him to live it well, or rescuing Gourmand, or giving Donita a spider-silk dress that was made ethically).
This... is a whole new different level. They for one, pulled a Starlight Glimmer and gave her a new attire (which sucks BTW), and secondly, they had her join the Kratts, but this episode is the first out of the 4 episodes to air, meaning that this likely has to take place after those 3 episodes, so already there's my timeline post to make.
But more importantly, what next? Will they stick with this change? Will this be one of the things that is immediately undone by the end of the episode? Will this have a big role in the series? Is this an elaborate April Fools' prank??? Is this real? Is this the ultimate Paisley Paver pro gamer move to defeat the Kratt Brothers and evade arrest? Will any of this play into the Wild Kratts movie??
I'll tell you what it means [unless it is a prank, which I frankly hope it is] It is the show jumping the shark, and in it, I see one of two outcomes. Either A) it will skyrocket this show like never before, or B) only spell the beginning of the end. Time will tell. And frankly, there is so much that could go wrong. Like so much. I've seen a lot of shows completely go downhill, crash, and burn after sticking up for them so much. I would want to say that Wild Kratts is not/will not be one of those shows, but I could be wrong. In beautifully creative ways, this show has pleasantly surprised me more, and it is still able to bring out episodes that have been some of PBS Kids' best. So I'm walking in completely neutral, and seeing what the blue and green future has in store.
Keep on Creature Adventuring you guys.... see you on the Creature Trail... for better or worse...
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scimagic · 2 months ago
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SMG4: WOTFI 2024 Thoughts and Analysis Masterpost
WOTFI 2024 is finally here and I had so much fun watching it! I've even watched it a few times already!! I'm so glad this was my first ever live WOTFI, it makes me wish I knew of SMG4 earlier but alas! I'm still so happy I found SMG4 and it's wonderful community the way I did!
This is one large compilation of all my reactions, opinions and deeper analysis... -es on WOTFI 2024! I will go over the entirety of the video almost scene-to-scene with my OWN OPINIONS! (And yes, it gets hella long) I divided it into sections of the video and even included pictures for viewing convenience!
Hope you enjoy reading essays <33
Warning: Spoilers (duh).
✧ Before The Show
As said before this was my first live WOTFI, since the episodes release at 9AM for me I had to put on my alarm one hour before but I shut it off fhjkdsa
So you can imagine my panic when I had to make my breakfast 10 minutes before it started
Not my greatest planning but I managed to (somewhat) make it on time!
✧ Let's Jump Right In!!
WHUH HAPPEN
Loved the spin off of Mr Puzzles' jingle, I knew I was going to get it stuck in my head the moment the lyrics switched
I was amused when Puzzles re-enacted his life, thought he'd give a little more meat to work with but I'm glad he just explained what we already knew. Some of his charm lies in the mystery that is his life
"So I did what any ambitious, misunderstood young soul would do... I locked myself in my room and watched TV all day!" So real tho-
I'm surprised I didn't see many people react to Puzzles cursing so loud hfdskja maybe we're all busy with the rest of WOTFI but I SCREAMED when he went "-WERE VIOLENTLY FUCKING CRUSHED BY YOU LOT!!"
LET THAT MAN CUSS FREELY!!!!
"... yyyou!" <3
LOVE EVERYONE'S COSTUMES TOO!! They all look great!!
Maybe it's because of the teasers they gave but I thought the crew was going to go against Puzzles himself with the challenges, but pitting them against Mario and SMG4 made me pleasantly surprised (I will be a lot throughout all this!)
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I ADORE THIS INTRO SO MUCH!! It's so fun and vibrant and the way it was animated was so cool!! I WANT THE POSTER SO BAD!!!
Haeheh big Puzzles from the website!!
Love how Saiko is just screaming at Puzzles too fhdskja
��� Fun Carnival Torture Metho- Games!!
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I didn't say what my challenge was but it was called Chuck N' Dunk: Who can dunk the other first in shark-infested waters?
It didn't make it but I do see shark-infested waters, so either I gave a bit of inspo or I'm just delusional hfdsjka
"I have to deal with internet comments all day! This is nothing!" HAH!!! THAT'S MY FUCKING YOUTUBER RIGHT THERE!!! (He still lost)
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Love to see SMG3 and Puzzles appreciate the beauty of destruction together, gotta love two villains vibin over causing chaos, it'd make for a fun dynamic if SMG4 ever considers it
On that note, when SMG3 tries to shake Four's tight rope I knew that was Three straight up
Even under Puzzles' control, the cast still retains a bit of their personality, as shown here and in the Puzzlevision episodes
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Bob has like- the coolest costume ever holy shit- I really wanna draw it some time
I KNOW IT'S JUST A MASK AND SOME RECOLORING ALRIGHT IT JUST FITS HIM AND HE LOOKS COOL
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I LOVE HIM SO. FUCKING. MUCH. HE'S SO SMUG THE BASTARD
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This is a really funny joke actually
PIE GUN GO BRRRRRRRRRRRR
I liked seeing Karen included in this WOTFI, she was a main character in a few episodes and her dynamic works well with the others! Just a tired mom wanting to work but pulled along silly adventures, grounding in a badass caring way
CHANGE THE WORLD. MY FINAL MESSAGE. GOODBYE!! God I haven't heard that meme in so long
Plus [Italian vc] YOU SONSOFFA BITCHES
"Hope you two have your running shoes on!" said in the gayest villain voice ever, I love him your honor
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Bob going for the clown girl instead of the exit is the Bob-iest thing ever and it just drives my point of the crew retaining their personalities even under control, so people shouldn't be surprised when it happens fhdjksa (cus I've seen it!)
FOUR ONLY WINNING BECAUSE HE'S A CLOWN IS SO FUNNY YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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So... Ben (SMG4's Thumbnail Artist) posted a lot of Gokus when someone mentioned Metallica's For Whom The Bell Tolls
That's why I thought there'd be some kind of reference to it in WOTFI which... now that I say it out loud sounds kinda dumb hfsjdka
But the moment Mario appeared as Goku I immediately thought of Ben and it had me gigglin fhdsjka
You'd think Tari would be in the ducky mini-game but you'd be wrong! <3
Final thoughts of the games, this year's WOTFI challenges were delightful!! They were all very clever from the audience and well chosen from the crew! Congratulations to the folks that got their prompt in!
✧ WHACK-A-LEGGY (aka forgive me father for this next part)
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You........ CANNOT tell me he wouldn't treat you right- God- DAMN.
LISTEN. HEAR ME OUT. YES I'M GONNA BE SIMPY IN THIS REACTION POST FUCK YOU.
Puzzles is the type of guy to give you the best of the best simply because you say so and deserve it, doesn't matter if it's as tame as a big bouquet of flowers OR as extreme as absolutely destroying your enemies through the most painful torture you have ever witnessed
He would treat you RIGHT!!!!
THAT IS THE MOST PERFECT MAN RIGHT THERE
Oh yes and I love his interactions with Leggy, they're adorable, yes FHDSKJA
THEY MAKE A CUTE DUO
Speaking of Puzzles treating you right: I am on the FUCKING FLOOR. THAT MAN IS PROTECTIVE TOO.
It's just so endearing to me how protective he is of Leggy (yes yes I know I know he's done evil shit to Meggy I know) BUT LISTEN.
In an actual redemption arc, I can see Puzzles as the most loyal motherfucker that you've ever befriended, that man is going to go to the edge of the earth and fight for you if needed BECAUSE you're his friend and that is so lovely to me
It's cute how he's trying to tell Leggy where to go, where to hide and just how worried he is of her
Mind you, the contrast between Puzzles being worried and SMG4 and Mario wanting to curve-stomp that goomba to death is hilarious fhdsjka
So forgive me if I giggle like a schoolgirl over that man
✧ I'm Gonna Get Real With You For A Moment
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MR STINKY
Oh this scene now- lots to unpack
First: Adore how this scene plays out, I love the portrayal of Puzzles' meltdown, induced by grief, sadness, anger and frustration over how things are playing out. It's a big "I'm supposed to win! Why don't you let me win!" moment, I simply adore when those happen.
The pitiful cries when you don't get your way when you've meticulously planned everything and done Everything to get it, and do everything did Puzzles indeed try
Second: The colors, the dramatic red light, the destruction of the park out of anger and overcharging it seems
It's basically a tantrum
Third: The voice acting is phenomenal, and that's been said all throughout the Puzzlevision arc, Brendan (Mr Puzzles' voice actor) is so good at his job- he's perfect in those high pitch inflictions of emotion and the lower threatening tones, that scream is chilling and painful
Fourth: I can try and decipher that blue screen
FATAL ERROR A problem has been detected and Mr. Puzzles has been shut down to prevent damage to himself. PUZZLEVISION.EXE Check to make sure any new show or movie is properly installed. If this is a new installation :It's not: ask your hardware or software manufacturer for any PUZZLEVISION updates you might need. :I don't need any: If problems continue, disable or remove any newly installed hardware or software. Disable CPU(?) memory options such as Unused Shows or Movies. If you need to use safe mode :I don't: to remove or disable components, restart yourself, press :nuhuh: to select Advanced Startup Options, and then select Safe Mode. :NO: Technical Information: *** STOP: 2xREADING (... xACTUALLY)
That last line is ineligible to me but I tried my best for y'all <3
Lots to unpack just in this tiny little message
In his system, Puzzles is programmed to shut down if damaged. Which is CRAZY TO THINK ABOUT. His OWN SYSTEM shuts down to prevent damage to himself.
Also he's SPEAKING THROUGH THE BLUESCREEN, he's actively saying No to "Safe Mode" and REFUSING any repairs his system suggests
THIS MAN DOES NOT CARE FOR HIS BODY (if you couldn't tell by the TV head part)
AND HE'S SO UNSERIOUS HE STRAIGHT UP TELLS HIS SYSTEM NUH UH!!!!
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A little easter egg that someone else on Twitter found :)
Puzzles has become a rage horror monster and I'm here for it, the horror elements do go hard when they're played
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URGH. AND THIS MOMENT. Many have pointed it out by now BUT THE TRAUMA OF THE CASTLE!! I AM SO WEAK
Puzzles REALLY plays into those psychological torture methods, it is so RUTHLESS of him, intentionally or not!!
✧ STEP RIGHT UP, MY FRIENDS, TO PUZZLEPARK!
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He looks horrible in armor despite being everyone's pathetic knight in shining armor FHJDSKA
"You're MINE" I SURE AM SIR!!!
THAT GROWL THO- BRENDAN STRIKING AGAIN WITH THEM VOCALS!!!
AND THIS!! IS THE MOMENT WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR OH BOY!!
The transition into the actual song is SO GOOD, instead of going higher like the actual Disney intro it goes LOWER and it's PERFECT for the intro!! It makes Puzzles sound INSANE (RIGHTFULLY SO!) It also tricks you because you know the melody so well until UH OH!! WE'RE IN DEEP SHIT!! LET'S GET THE FUCK IN!
3!
2!
1!
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IMMEDIATELY threateningly playful I LOVE IT!!
It sounds so much like the songs in Nightmare Before Christmas, Kidnap Sandy Claws, Oogie Boogie's song, it has their same vibes! The same devilishly playful with their victims kind of vibes and it's RIGHT UP MY ALLEY BABY
It has SUCH an energizing beat too!! It makes you wanna jump in your seat to the beat!
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The set up is so fun too, purple is an interesting choice to go with.
I cannot stress enough how GOOD THE VOCALS ARE TOO I WAS ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT
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AND THIS PART. GOES EXTREMELY HARD. THEY ALL LOOK GREAT
They cooked with the choir of minions fr!! They sound great together!!
The chorus of the song is just as catchy as Creative Control, I had worries that I wasn't going to like this one as much as CC but I was SO wrong!! It's right up it's alley! They both have their strengths and their unique way of presenting Mr Puzzles, I wouldn't be able to decide which one is "better" since they both have different points to send across
Creative Control is jazzier, it taunts the crew and introduces Puzzles as the master villain with a bit of backstory, it's used to show the control on the crew both visually and lyrically with Puzzles putting them in different scenarios while singing how they can't leave
Meanwhile Puzzlepark, while similar in the controlling part, has more going on. It's not just Puzzles trying to control/stop Meggy, SMG4 and Mario, it's also them fighting back when they couldn't in CC. It also has the rest of the group trying to detain them, mind-controlled by Puzzles. It's crazier than just putting them in shows and popular culture references, it's throwing things at them, attacking them and messing with the world, trying to enact revenge yknow!
I particularly like when Meggy and Puzzles sing together, their voices contrast well
"But it's time for you to die now." Haehah! Hello!! This is the part where I kill you!!
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AND A LAWSUIT ARC REFERENCE TOO!? OH I'M IN HEAVEN!!!
The lyrics scratch at a very nice part of my brain, I think SMG4 has always had a knack for rhyming, they've perfected it over the years and it's paid off well
And combined with the change in beat it goes for extra points, mwah!! Chef's kiss!!
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"That child is gone... Six feet under right WHERE YOU AND YOUR STUPID FRIENDS BELONG!!"
MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE PART FUCKING EVER!!!! THEY ABSOLUTELY COOKED
IT'S ABOUT HOW THREATENING PUZZLES IS IT'S ABOUT MEGGY STILL TRYING TO HELP HIM DESPITE IT ALL IT'S ABOUT HIM ABSOLUTELY REFUSING THE HELP BECAUSE THAT'S. JUST. HIM. PUZZLES. REFUSES. HELP. THINGS go his way or they don't go at all!!!
AND THAT ENDING NOTE MYYYY GODDDD GIVE THIS MAN AN EMMY RIGHT ABOUT FUCKING NOW!!!!
That was such a clean note, Brendan has an amazing singing voice and I'll be listening to this on repeat for A WEEK
SMG4 RELEASE PUZZLEPARK ON SPOTIFY NOW AND MY LIFE!!! IS YOURS!!!!
✧ In The End... It's For The Better...
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They like using the trope of going inside a character's brain/heart/whatever to talk to them huh...
I'm not saying it as a bad thing! It's just a pattern I'm sure we've all noticed! I think it's cute!
SMG4 wouldn't be SMG4 if they at least didn't Try to save their villains, sure there's distasteful ones like that lizard that absolutely deserved it, but all the other villains had redemption arcs, heart to hearts, sympathy before dying... SMG4 is about chances, finding your people and having a heart even towards those who wronged you, even if in the end the worst happens to them
And I think that's beautiful
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Regardless of having a heart, however, Meggy has the absolute right to be angry at Puzzles, maybe it wasn't right but I don't blame her for snapping at a kid, that kid Is Puzzles after all
I see two possible interpretations of Meggy becoming Leggy one more time: either- Truly to get close to Puzzles and become a true friend, or simple manipulation to get him to stop. Either are possible in my book, maybe with a little more thought I'd be able to know which one but for now I remain satisfied with being skeptical on this one, I don't care to find what the real intentions were since I know the ending.
Plus nothing is in black and white, there's a lot of layers to Puzzles' and Meggy's relationship........
And speaking of that ending-
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HAH!!!!
I THOUGHT THAT SHIT WAS HILARIOUS!!
IN TRUE SMG4 FASHION YOU (SORTA) REDEEM A VILLAIN AND CELEBRATE SAVING THE DAY WITH A STUPID MEME
WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO FOLKS IT'S SMG4 IT'S THE FUNNY HAHA MEME SHOW!!
STOP TAKING IT SO FUCKING SERIOUSLY THE WHOLE TIME!!
IT CAN BE SERIOUS AND STUPID!!!!
Mr Puzzles SHOULD go to the psych ward, HE'S FUCKING INSANE
YOU DON'T GET REDEEMED IMMEDIATELY AFTER ALL THAT!!
I'm glad they didn't redeem him completely! I didn't believe him at all when he said he learned a valuable lesson! I was like No The Fuck You Didn't!
You can have a redemption later! That's okay! I trust the writers with handling the arcs and making them good! And you heard Luke, they might bring him back later! (Which is a definite yes!)
I would love for them to take it slow with Puzzles, not immediately of course, let him breathe and write another arc right now, settle things with everything and everyone and THEN you can break him out, the universe is full of possibilities, and I'm SURE I will enjoy whatever the SMG4 crew writes
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Haeheh she looks like a nerd with those goggles
Someone's Artist Puzzles AU just came true btw-
"And Didney shut down..!" :D
The Showgrounds is gonna start looking more like an actual carnival too!! Wahoo!!
I WANT THAT FUCKING HOODIE-
That Puzzle plushie looks so ugly I LOVE HIMMMM
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I WANT THAT FUCKING POSTER AND KEYCHAIN
SOMEONE PLEASE FUCKING COMMISSION ME SO I CAN BUY THEMMMMMM AEUGHHHHHH
Thank YOU LUKE AND SMG4 CREW FOR GIVING US THIS WOTFI!!! I LOVED IT WITH ALL MY HEART <33
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I would love to hang out and go get some pizza with Mr Puzzles :(
And finally... that lil jingle to end with the rolling credits
✧ Final Thoughts
Believe me when I say I think this is the best possible ending for Puzzles, he doesn't die, he doesn't get completely redeemed, but he does face consequences and he gets a chance for the future, best of both worlds me thinks
I loved this rollercoaster that was Puzzlevision, I might've hopped on the train sorta late but I stayed for all the duration of the ride and I had a blast <3
Mr Puzzles was great and maliciously loveable, learning about all these characters and growing to care about them was amazing, I'm really happy I have a new series I can watch and analyze and enjoy!! I'll be remaining in my seat with my one ticket until I get off the SMG4 train, not sure when!! But until then you can expect me to still love this show, draw for it and analyze it much more than any reasonably normal person should.
If you've read this far, I love you soso much and hope you enjoyed this hell of a scroll, because I spent so many hours on this shit YOU WOULDN'T UNDERSTAND-
K BYEEEE <333
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strangeandun-muse-ual · 2 years ago
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He definitely did not know what any of those words meant (the only horror movies Chaz was into were the ones with killer sharks), but he knew it definitely meant bad news for him. God, he was so fucked.
He took a step back, his hand clenching a little tighter around the bag. What the fuck did an Overlord need with this kind of cash anyway? This chick probably already had private island money. Chaz could almost accept getting jumped by some other broke fuck, but this? Fuck, this was just insult to injury.
But he didn't let go of the bag. Because fuck, what had all of this been for? Why else did he leave Mox there, like a fucking jackass, to take the fall for all this? He still clung to the narrative weakly in his head, with the desperation of a traitorous, cowardly loser trying to convince himself he wasn't a terrible person. Him showing up at the station to pay Mox's bail (could you even do that for this level of crime?), the relief and happiness in Moxxie's face when he saw he'd come to his rescue after all (replacing the image of his tearful eyes and slackjawed betrayal right before Chaz turned to run).
They'd get away from his prick of a dad, like they'd talked about sometimes. Go somewhere nice together. Chaz would be speeding down the highway in a slick new car, blasting showtunes and whatever shit Moxxie liked to sing along to on the radio, and everything would be fine. Chaz would be the suave, dashing, extremely well-endowed romantic hero, and it would be okay.
The bitch wasn't wrong. It was his hopes and dreams in that bag, as fragile and meaningless as those ultimately were.
"I... uh..." he swallowed. "C-can't we work somethin' else out here?" He thought quickly, and "thinking quickly" for Chaz inevitably led to his solution for most problems.
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"I-I mean, I dunno, I can think of plenty'a ways to show you a good time that don't include a sackful of cash! ... Which this isn't! It isn't; I, uh, figured I oughta bring that up again."
"It's not huh?" Pouting a little, as he'd done exactly as she'd told him not to, she crossed her arms over her chest, "Oh!! Oh, I get it, I know what's in the bag, then!"
Clapping her hands together, she bounced on her heels twice before falling forward into a few steps that brought her almost nose-to-nose with him.
"It's your hope and dreams, huh?" Oh, her grin was positively wicked, "Hand 'em over before I make you look like the aftermath of a Mark Hoffman-era Saw trap."
She paused.
"Where I'm from, that's a biiiiiiiiiiig bad thing. He's a shitty apprentice."
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noteguk · 4 years ago
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danger zone | knj | m
— summary; in which namjoon lives a dangerous life and sometimes you can’t really stand it. Still, you can’t step away either. 
— contents and warnings; smut, a little spark of angst and a fuckload of fluff, criminal!namjoon x reader, established relationship, dom!namjoon and sub!reader, breast play, fingering, oral (f rec), dirty talk, begging, Namjoon has a big dick, unprotected sex, creampie, a bit of possessiveness, multiple orgasms, overstimulation 
— words; 4,5k 
— author’s note; this was supposed to be a quick pwp drabble but here we are… 
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Words could not explain the relief that washed over you when you saw the headlights peaking through the diaphanous living room curtains, blasting inside your house like beacons of divine hope. You ran to the front door faster than ever before, stepping into the cold mist of the night as he closed the car door behind him. You managed to see his friend, Hoseok, waving you goodbye before he pulled out of the driveway and you started balling your eyes out. 
And then you couldn’t really see anything else. 
Namjoon did not hesitate to walk toward you, wrapping his strong arms around your lower back and pulling you closer to his warm chest. He smelled of vanilla and cigarettes, and your knees almost buckled at the thought of losing that scent forever. 
“Baby, you’re gonna catch a cold,” he mumbled, placing a soft kiss on the top of your head. Namjoon positioned one hand on the nape of your neck, playing with your hair as you whimpered against his hot embrace, fists clenched over his pecs. You were wearing only pyjama shorts and a tank top, and the gelid breeze of the night showed you no mercy. “Why don’t we go inside?” 
For a moment you thought that your legs would fail you, but, to your relief, it was just a feeble impression. Namjoon held you tightly against him as you two walked back inside your house, mumbling how much he missed you, how much he couldn’t wait to see you again. All that you could do was to listen, with your nose stuffy and eyes tearing up, as he started telling you about his past few weeks.
You had been sure you had lost him that time. Namjoon had never stayed longer than a day without talking to you (or at least telling you that he would be a bit M.I.A. for the following weeks, because of the secretive nature of his work), and the fact that you had gotten nothing but silence for almost three weeks was enough to make your mind go wild. It wasn’t hard to imagine that the worst had finally happened. 
There was no one you could call — as in, you had a few numbers, but you were prohibited to get in contact with them. Namjoon had made it clear that he didn’t want you to get involved in his business, and something as simple as a phone call to the wrong person could be enough to get you wrapped up in an official investigation. He had made special efforts to make sure that, in case all went to shit, the feds could never prove that you knew anything about his illicit schemes. If something happened to him — prison, death, something in between — Namjoon would be at peace knowing that you were safe and taken care of. 
So, you had been good, and you didn’t call. You had just waited, fighting through your normal routine and forging fake smiles towards your coworkers. By the time that the second week rolled around, you were considering calling every morgue in the country — and then quickly melted down once you realized he was probably not even using his real name. There was nothing you could do but wait. For god knows how long. 
Times like those made you want to give up on everything. You and Namjoon had a chemistry that you never felt before, you understood each other in levels that you never thought possible. He loved you with all of his heart and you felt the same. And yet, you were exhausted from being so scared for him, from feeling so helpless in the face of his unstable and unpredictable job. 
You had told yourself that, if he came back, you would end it all. 
But now that he was standing in front of you, things weren’t so easy. 
Your boyfriend took you to the kitchen, where he warmed up a drink for you as he told you about how he had spent those last few weeks. Namjoon explained that one of his shipments had been stolen (of what, you didn’t dare to ask), and he had to take care of it himself. During that time, he and his crew were being attacked and watched constantly, and he would never risk the idea of pulling you into that mess. It was an unspoken truth that having you as a hostage would make all of his defenses crumble. Expressing any sort of weakness in his business was like bleeding in a sea full of sharks.  
You understood, because of course you would. And he understood when you told him about how terrified, how overwhelmingly worried you had been. 
“I wanted to call Yoongi, Hoseok… I don’t know, anyone,” you said, taking your cup of tea closer to your face. The heat emanated in waves, warming up your lips as the thin lines of smoke curled up in the air. You took a small slip, and the coldness of the night was just a memory then. “But I knew that I shouldn’t do that, so I just… Joon, I thought you were dead.” 
“I’m so sorry, love.” Namjoon pulled you in, wrapping one arm around your back and pressing a kiss against your forehead. You always felt so safe in his arms, like nothing could ever touch you. “I know how you feel, it’s unfair making you go through this.” 
“It is.” You sniffed, looking down at your tea cup. “But it’s all for you. And I love you, Joon.” 
There was a second of silence as the words floated in the space between the two of you, a deep sigh from your part as you placed the cup on the marble surface of the kitchen island. That house felt too big for you, too spacious and filled with expensive stuff, and it whispered doubts in your ear. You didn’t know where all that money came from, you often didn’t know what Namjoon was doing or what he was thinking about. You had no idea what kind of dangers he faced every single day, or the hoops he had to jump through to keep you safe. 
You could have given up on everything already. You knew that he would understand. But you didn’t. Time and time again, you would realize that all your momentaneous bravery towards a breakup was short-lived: you loved him more than you feared losing him. You wanted Namjoon and no one else. You knew that ending things and stepping into an ordinary life, with an ordinary guy and ordinary worries, would never cut it. You had learned to live in the danger zone that was your relationship with Namjoon, and you doubted you could ever truly step away from it. 
Namjoon knew that too. He looked down at you with a deep mixture of tenderness and devotion in his dark eyes, caressing your cheek as he dove in to place a kiss on your lips. “I love you too, baby,” he murmured. “I missed you so much.”  
You melted in his hold, surrounding his waist with your arms and pushing yourself against his chest. “Missed you too,” you said. “I know why you keep these things secret from me, but it fucking sucks.” 
Namjoon chuckled, his calloused hands caressing your hair. You realized that he probably was just as worried as you — not knowing if you were safe, if you hadn’t gotten yourself in a messy situation trying to find him. Needless to say, he was filled with pride knowing you did everything he had asked you to. “I’m gonna tell you a secret, but you can’t tell anyone.” The suspense in his voice was enough for you to pull away from his chest, looking up at him with expectant eyes. Namjoon cupped your checks with his hands and smiled. “You're the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” 
You could not fight the smirk that crawled up on your lips. That simple sentence was enough to shift the weight of the atmosphere around the two of you, allowing for your hurt to slip away. “Bullshit,” you said. 
“I’m serious.” He raised his eyebrows, lowering himself so he could place another pec on your lips. “Inside and out.”
That time, you could not hold back your laugh. “You’re so cheesy.” 
Your comment seemed to light up something inside his head, because, the next second, Namjoon was pulling away with a click of his tongue. “Speaking of cheesy, I almost forgot,” he started to say, turning around. “I got you something. It’s in the bedroom with the rest of my stuff.” 
You stood still for a second, trying to understand his words. “You... got me something? In the middle of all of that mess?” Then you were rushing behind him, going up the stairs as Namjoon simply hummed in agreement. “Joon, it’s okay, I—“ 
“Accept my gift, baby.” He stopped as he reached the second floor, waiting for you to catch up. “It’s not gonna make up for the time away, but I want to make you happy.” 
“What is it?” You asked, wet eyes blinking up at him, but he only smiled and turned around, gesturing for you to follow him into the bedroom. 
Namjoon’s present was a dress — or, rather, the dress. It was this beautiful long gown you had seen a few months back during one of your trips to the mall, a grandiose red thing that wrapped around the mannequin’s upper body before expanding just beneath its thighs. You remember feeling overwhelmed by its beauty, holding Namjoon’s hand tighter as you shared your amazement with him. Your fascination was short lived, though, because soon the price tag scared you away and you made yourself forget about that overpriced dream. 
Until that night, that was. Namjoon told you he had the gift ready to go before it all went down with the shipment situation, and the image of you wearing it was one of the few things that managed to keep him sane for so long. The glimmer of happiness in his eyes was enough for you to silence yourself before you could argue about the dress’ ostentatious price, instead choosing to thank him. 
You changed in the large bathroom of your master suite, eyes lost in the way the red shade, pure as sin, clung to your body like it was made for you. There was a wave of love gushing out of your heart, a joyfulness that only came from those little surprises that Namjoon would give you. You loved it. You loved him. 
“God,” Namjoon mumbled to himself when you stepped out of the bathroom, his figure sitting on the corner of your large bed. There was a moment of silence as his eyes ran all over your body, trying to memorize every little detail of you, his mind going blank and his mouth dropping in awe. “I might as well fall to my knees and ask for your hand in marriage now.”
You giggled, stepping closer to the bed. “Careful, I might say yes,” you told him, placing your arms around his shoulders. Namjoon looked up at you with so much devotion that you thought you could collapse at any given point. “I loved it. Thank you, Joon.”
He hummed, taking his large palms to rest on either side of your waist. You could feel his heat emanating through the fabric of the dress, sending waves of anticipation up and down your body. “I’m glad you did,” he spoke, his voice much lower than before. You knew Namjoon enough to know exactly what he was thinking, and there was nothing you wanted more than that. “My girl is so pretty…”
His lips were on your neck soon after, nipping and sucking your skin like they were made for that. Namjoon’s hands were trying to explore everywhere at the same time, moving from to your breasts to your waist, then back down your thighs and up your hips and toward your ass — where he placed a strong grip. 
“So fucking pretty… all mine,” he was speaking to himself at that point, his breath heavy around your collarbones. Namjoon tugged at the sides of the dress, completely ignoring the zipper as he tried to take it off of you. 
You laughed at his eagerness. “Careful with the dress, Joon.” 
“I’ll buy you another one.” He tugged at the fabric again, harder that time, and you were afraid that he was actually going to tear it in half if you didn’t act soon. “I’ll buy you any dress you want, don’t care if I ruin this one.” 
“I don’t want any other dresses, though.” Your hands left his shoulders and moved up your back, finding the zipper and swiftly pulling it down. Soon enough, the dress was just a pool of redness circling your feet. “I just want you.” 
Namjoon swallowed hard at the image of your bare body in full display for him — he should’ve known you wouldn’t wear any underwear with that piece of sin, and he couldn’t say that he was disappointed. All that it took you was one glimpse at his pants to see his hard cock already straining against the fabric, needy for you. 
“So beautiful,” he said, reaching out to place his hand on your hip. Namjoon’s eyes were everywhere at once, drinking you up. You knew he was holding back, he could flip you over and fuck you into the mattress at any second he wished to. “Is this all for me, baby?” 
“Yes,” you told him, taking his hand and guiding it to your breast. Namjoon squeezed the soft flesh, making you whimper at the feeling. “All yours, Joon.” 
“All mine,” he repeated, finally breaking out of his trance and meeting your stare. Namjoon was probably stressed out of his mind, and you just managed to turn all that negative energy into pure sexual stamina. Not that you were complaining. “Want you to lay down for me, baby.” 
You did not hesitate to do as he requested, moving around the large circular bed and placing your head against the soft pillows. There was a fire of expectation burning at the pit of your stomach and accumulating between your thighs, which only grew as you watched your boyfriend undress for you. 
Namjoon was quick and objective with his movements and soon enough he was naked, his golden skin shining under the warm lights and his big cock standing erect and flushed, ready for you. Just by looking at him you could feel your walls clenching, a sigh perishing on your lips at the memory of his member inside you, stretching you out like no one else could. Your boyfriend didn’t only have one of the biggest dicks you had ever seen, but he also knew how to use it — a dangerous combination that mostly explained why you couldn’t walk straight after a good night by his side. Again: not that you were complaining. 
The mattress dipped under his weight, your eyes following his movements as Namjoon placed himself between your legs. His eyes were hungry and focused, more than you had seen in a while, and when he commanded you to “Open your legs for me, love,” you couldn’t obey fast enough. 
Namjoon hummed in content as he leaned down between your thighs, one finger lazily dragging upwards between your soaked folds. He barely touched you, but you were so on the edge that the motion was enough to make you sigh. “Such a pretty cunt,” he said, and the finger moved back down, tenderly rubbing around your sensitive entrance. You flinched at the feeling, biting on your lip to suppress a moan. “So wet for me. Did you touch yourself while I was gone, baby?” 
There was no reason to lie, he would know regardless. “Yes, but only once.” 
It was true: after Namjoon had stopped contacting you, you were so scared that you didn’t even think about anything sexual — nor were you in the right mindset for that. 
He seemed to like your response, humming for a moment before he took a second digit to your entrance — never going in, though, only teasing its surroundings. “Was it good, baby?” 
You knew exactly what he wanted to hear, “Not as good as you,” you said, leaning on your elbows so you could hold his gaze better. Namjoon was looking at you like a starved man, and you knew it was just a matter of time before his own self-control ran thin. “Your cock is so much better.” 
He chuckled — a deep, melodious chuckle that sent heat straight to your core. “Needy girl,” he said, gaze flickering towards your face. “I can’t give it to you just like that. What’s the fun in doing something so fast? You have to earn my cock.” 
Patience was not a virtue you shared with your boyfriend, though, and that was why Namjoon loved to push you to the limits of your self-restraints. You had been foolish to think that things would be different just because he missed you. “How?” You asked, ready to do whatever he asked. 
Namjoon hummed, pretending to think for a moment. His fingers left your opening behind and he moved closer to your pussy, taking a long look at it before saying, “Cum on my tongue and I’ll think about giving it to you.” 
Before you could even think about what to respond, his mouth was on you and your head was spinning. Namjoon repeated the same motions of his fingers — licking a thick stripe up your folds and then back down, protruding the wet muscle against your entrance, swirling his tongue around it. You whimpered at the feeling, body crashing against the bed and fingers intertwining on his hair as he decided to move back up, lips wrapping around your clit as he gave you a gentle suck, humming when you started to moan out his name. 
“Right there, please,” you asked, your voice nothing but a pathetic plea. 
Namjoon, however, was marching to the beat of his own drum. He ignored your request and neglected your clit so his mouth could return to your opening, this time allowing his tongue inside you, drinking every drop of wetness you were giving him. A tremulous breath got caught in your throat when he pressed two of his fingers on your hole, coating it with his saliva before plunging in. 
You cried out, your back arching off the mattress as he continued with his ministrations; his fingers stretching you out as his mouth returned to play with your clit. Namjoon had you the way he liked it: a hot mess sprawled on the bed, seeking your high like it was the most important thing in the world. And he, of course, wouldn’t mind giving it to you as many times as you wanted it. 
The sounds you were making were lewd, mixing with the noises of his fingers pumping in and out of your clenching heat. Namjoon was only human: his cock was so hard that he was losing his mind, and the gorgeous sight of you fumbling under his touches was making him wish you could just cum so he could fuck the soul out of you. 
And because you two were in sync, that was exactly what you did. Namjoon watched in awe as you came around his digits, tightening around him so perfectly that he swore he was about to spill himself on his pristine white sheets. But he managed to keep it together as you continued to roll your pussy against his face, milking the last drops of your orgasm as your wetness dripped down his fingers. 
Namjoon moved away when you started to produce those high-pitched whimpers that signaled your sensitivity. He climbed up over you and crashed his lips on yours, humming as your tongues danced together, filling your mouth with your own taste. His cock was enlarged and heavy against your lower body, barely brushing on your sensitive clit. 
He pulled away so he could speak, his voice was a devilish low groan swimming in the hot air. “Want my cock inside you, baby?”
You were spent already, both of you knew that, and yet there was no hesitation in your tone when you promptly answered with a timid, “Yes, please.”
No matter how much you loved Namjoon’s mouth and fingers on you, there was nothing in the world that could compare to the feeling of having his cock thrusting inside you, filling you up so perfectly. You could fight against a bit of pain, you had done that a few times already, and you knew how fast your boyfriend was to turn everything back into pleasure. 
“Can you cum again for me?” He asked, lowering his hand so he could align himself with your pussy. You swallowed at the brushing of his head against your hole, heartbeat quickening in anticipation. “Can you do one more, baby?” 
You nodded, looking deep inside his eyes. “Yes, as many times as you want.” 
“I don’t deserve you,” Namjoon spoke gently, honest as ever. He leaned in and kissed you slowly, savoring the caresses of your lips as he sighed against the kiss. “You’re too good for me.” 
And then he was pushing himself inside you, spreading you open like he was meant to be there, filling you up to the brim. You heaved and held to his shoulders as Namjoon reached incredibly deep inside you, getting used to his size. No matter how many times he fucked you, every time still felt like the first. 
“Fuck, your pussy feels perfect, like it was made for me,” he cursed, slowly thrusting inside you. You whimpered at the delicious drag of his cock against your walls, already experiencing the switch of pain to pleasure. “Keep your legs up for me, baby.”
You could only nod, pushing your legs to the level of your chest. That small change was enough to give Namjoon just a bit more space to slip into, a grunt exploding on his throat. 
“Joon,” you called. Namjoon looked up at you, his eyes dazed and unfocused. “Fuck me, please.” 
That was all that he needed. Self-control long forgotten, Namjoon buried his face on the crook of your neck and went to town — fucking you so fast and hard that you swore you had never moaned so loud in your life. Suddenly, everything was becoming too much: the bouncing of your breasts, the pressure of his hands on your thighs, the drilling of his hard cock inside you. Every worry you had those past few weeks were washed away just like that, barely an echo at the bottom of your head. 
Namjoon was a mess above you, grunting and moaning out as his cock fucked you open, your walls clenching around him like you were his personal brand of heaven. “Fuck, you feel so tight,” he cried out, already recognizing that familiar pressure at the base of his spine. “Such a perfect pussy for me, baby.” 
“Feels so good, Joon,” you said back, tugging at his hair. “Look at me.” 
It seemed to take him an herculean amount of force, but Namjoon did as you requested, meeting that fucked-out gaze he adored so much. “What is it?” 
You smiled tenderly at him, a timid moan falling from your lips. “I love you.” 
Now Namjoon was absolutely sure that he was in paradise, floating in the clouds above. He could not hold back the smile that crossed his face. “I love you too, baby.” He kissed you. “Are you close?” 
You nodded. “Really close.” 
“Cum on my cock for me, then,” he urged you on, not stopping with his advances. He felt so good inside you; your mind was consumed by all of him: his smell, his warmth, the deepness of his voice and the lust in his gaze. At that moment, Namjoon was everything in the world for you. “Come on, I wanna feel it.” 
And you did as he requested, clenching around his cock not even two minutes later. You sobbed and whimpered at the feeling, calling out his name again and again until Namjoon found his own high, spilling himself inside you, milking his cock in your pussy until you were full of him. He thrusted a few more times, trying to make that moment last a bit longer, and he only stopped once he started to grow soft inside you. 
Namjoon turned around and crashed next to you on the mattress, his arm curling around your waist as you fumbled closer to him. With a happy sigh, you nestled against his chest, drowning in his warmth as his fingers caressed your skin. 
The instant of peace was glorious, and you had almost started to drift away into a tranquil sleep when his voice broke the silence. “I’m gonna have to travel again next week,” he said. 
Your heart started hammering against your chest, stomach curling in anxiety. You raised your head from his chest and stared at Namjoon, your lips opening and closing before you finally found your voice. “But… You just got home.”
“I know, that’s why you’re coming with me.” He smirked. You must’ve shown him the most confused expression, because Namjoon could not hold back his laugh. “It’s not business, baby, don’t worry. You and I are just going to have some well-deserved time together. How does that sound?” 
Relief washed over you for the second time that night, calming your anxiety instantly. “Amazing,” you admitted, resting yourself back against him. You could really use a vacation, you didn’t know the last time you had a proper one. And even better if it was with him. “Thank you, Joon.”
“I should be the one thanking you.” He breathed out. The caresses on your skin were calling the sleepiness back into your body, and you knew it wouldn’t be long until you floated into the land of dreams. It has been a long time since you had a proper night of sleep — you had been too restless waiting for his return. “I know this is really hard for you. You know I’d understand if you wanted to leave.” 
You smiled lovingly, placing a kiss against his chest. “It’s worth it if it’s for you,” you mumbled. 
And you knew he felt the same. 
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theflyingfeeling · 3 years ago
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So I don't know what you've already heard of the Lahti concert from other sources but here's my report anyway 🖤
The first thing I need to tell you is that in front of me there was this sweet sweet girl who needed a hair tie so I borrowed her mine because I wasn't using it and as a thank you she filmed me so many, long videos and she had an EXCELLENT view to the stage!!! 😭
I mean, I did too, holy shit they were close, my breath was taken away when Porko suddenly appeared what felt like mere metres away from me 😵
I could see all their expressions and omg 🥺 they were all so happy to be playing a show again 🥺🥺 I especially loved the look on Niko's face and in general I was happy to see him a little better, I feel like I didn't see much of him at the Tampere gig
Joel did lots of interaction with Joonas as per usual and 🥺🥺🥺🥺 sometimes he went up to stand next to Aleksi and just 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 smile and look at him 😭😭😭😭
OLLI SANG!!! ........except that he didn't 🤡 They/we hyped it up and everyone was like omg he's gonna sing HE'S GONNA SING--- and then he fucking lipsynced to the opening of a Bon Jovi song 🤠 I swear to fucking god. This man is such a troll and I hate him 💞
Also, getting fucking rickrolled at a BC concert is NOT what I thought I'd ever experience, and yet 🤠 thx Porko <3
Aleksi had a little DJ solo of his own and everyone was happy 🥰 He also jumped around the stage during Sharks Love Blood 💓
Speaking of which, The Kiss was 💀!! It happened right in front of my salad and I died, I'm actually writing this from the grave
The setlist??!?! They played SO MANY SONGS I DID NOT EXPECT THEM TO, such as Giants and Enemy For Me 😵 Giants especially was a special moment to me personally, will post a video tomorrow 💗
And they STARTED with Balboa of all the songs, blasting my brain right to the back wall 👌
Niko/Joonas flirting, but what else is new (Niko @ the crowd: "I've been looking at you all evening." Joonas @ Niko: "I've been looking at you too 😏" Niko: "who's surprised, hands up" lmaooo these guys 🥰)
Tommi didn't say a single fucking word the whole gig lol go on give us nothing, #onsealfa
Probably forgot something, will add later
I've had a shit past two months due to work stuff, but this kind of made up for it all. I love this band so much and oh god I'm gonna cry
Anyone with whom I talked about the gig beforehand knows how nervous I was (thanks for all the nice words btw <3) but, as per usual, everything went perfectly fine, I had possibly the best night of my life so far, and I'm so so happy that I went. I wish it would never have ended.
Some time ago someone sent me an ask asking what's the best concert I've been to. Back then I answered Antti Tuisku @ 2017 SuomiPopFestarit and BC @ Tampere back in August. They have now been replaced, and only another BC gig will ever compare. They are amazing live, and if you are given the chance to go to their concert, TAKE IT AND RUN 🖤
But let me tell ya, one of my absolute favourite moments happened AFTER the gig at the merch stall 🙈 This is the interaction I had with Miki, roughly translated:
Miki: *struggles to find the size tag of the WANS hoodie I'm buying*
me: it's an S
Miki: S, got it. *tells me the sum of my purchases*
me: *hands him my credit card*
Miki: *takes the card and inserts it in the payment terminal* it's a busy night!
me: yeah, but it's good you got your hands full am I right
Miki: yes, it's a positive problem! *tells me how to navigate on the payment terminal*
me: *barely manages to choose debit instead of credit and then just stares at the machine when it asks for my pin code because 1) the machine looks completely different to those in grocery stores for example, and 2) I had not expected to get to do small talk with Miki lol)
Miki: ..did you blackout?
me: YES, the numbers are in different order, you know, from the ones they have in grocery stores?!
Miki: *takes out that exact kinda payment terminal I'm talking about* no, they're in the same order
me: *upon seeing the more familiar-looking machine, remembers her pin code, THANK HEAVENS, and the payment is accepted* Y E S
In conclusion, you are all invited to our summer wedding 🥰🤣
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articulate-and-annoying · 2 years ago
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Okay final thoughts.
Overall this was very cathartic. I almost felt like I got a bit of closure about my dramatic breakup with the show after season 4 aired. Just taking it all start to finish, now with professional writing and editing experience under my belt, and a deep love for other pieces of Sherlock media, it feels like finally putting this little piece of my teenage self to rest.
The one good thing consistently in the show that I will always love, is the actors. Jesus Christ, they were perfectly cast, and put their whole chest into every terribly written cheesy line, and for that I will give them credit. My favorite parts about the earlier seasons are all just because the actors and their chemistry are just phenomenal.
Another thing I've realized about why I like the earlier seasons a little more, is that they're more campy. They don't take themselves as seriously or try to be dramatic, pearl clutching, edge of your seat television. It was a buddy comedy where they flounced around London and got shot at. I contribute the decline in my enjoyment in the later seasons directly to how seriously the show is taking itself. It's still funny at times, but just, too earnest in it's attempts to be cool and dramatic. It fell into the teen drama show trap of just constantly upping the ante and needing to one up the previous arc, and eventually it just lost it's momentum.
Mainly, I see this in the way the show writes it's villains after Moriarity. I firmly believe they brought him in too soon, or at the very least killed him off too soon. They jumped the shark for their antagonists after Andrew Scott, and because he was such a phenomenal actor and came off as such a threat, the new villains needed to get bigger and better. But they all felt derivative of Moriarity, to the point they needed to bring him back in Seasons 3 and 4 to keep people interested. Maganussen is just Moriarity with less inflection and a mind palace. Smith is just Mangussen but replace the blackmail with bloodlust.
The other thing that will never stop making me want to rewrite the show, is how Irene, Molly and Mary are treated. The writers do NOT know how to write women.
The issue with Irene Adler has already been discussed at length in the fandom so I won't go too far into it since I don't have much new to add. I will say that Irene's protrayal as a love interest in Sherlock stories will always bother me. She serves as a lesson to be learned, Irene is memorable because she reminds Sherlock never to underestimate anyone, regardless of sex. He made a mistake with her, and got bested in his own game. He keeps a photo of her for the same reason he asks John to tell him "Norbury" if he ever gets too full of himself. Irene humbled him, she wasn't a love interest.
Molly should have never existed as a character. I love her actor, and think she did a phenomenal job with what she was given. But Molly always felt shoehorned into the plot, like they needed to hand her a purpose that otherwise could have been given to another character, just to keep her around. I so desperately wanted there to have been a proper arc for her, but with TFP, the last we get of her on screen is Sherlock emotionally devastating her. Justice for Molly.
And then there's Mary. God I love her, even more so on this most recent watch. The TEH and TSoT are her at her best in many ways. Her dynamic with John and Sherlock is fantastic, she's able to be helpful and works wonderfully as a genuine long term addition to the cast. And even further than that, I'm in love with the idea of making her an assassin. There's so much you could do there, especially when it comes to bringing her into cases more and making her a part of the team. The only issue is that the writers fumble the ball on how they handle her and her backstory.
They introduce AGRA in 3.3, to kill her off and end the plot in 4.1. she gets 2 episodes to be a badass, and half of that time she's pregnant. Her story didn't go anywhere besides giving us the completely wasted plot of Sherlock and John fighting since it lasted an episode. Mary deserved so much better, and in a better universe got more time to be fleshed out.
Which is actually a great segue into my next major issue with the show: it had too many ideas to fit into 90 minutes, especially seasons 3 & 4. You can tell the writers had massive ideas for everything they wanted to squeeze into the season but didn't have time to really flesh out everything. So we got a lot of quick ideas in a long long episode. Season 4 reminds me of workshopoing short stories that have gotten too big for their restricted word count, and having the author refuse to cut anything to make the plot more cohesive. There should have been better editing done to ensure the flow and consistency of the narrative, but instead it ended up a jumbled, oddly paced, mess by the end.
Overall, I don't hate this show. There are a lot of things I am desperate to fix, and honestly might try my hand at someday. I think so show is just filled to the brim with wasted potential, all it really needs is some polish and a good editor and it can be a passably interesting show! I'm glad I rewatched it to put a rest to the anger I felt towards how it ended, but I don't think I'll watch it all through again.
TL;DR: BBC Sherlock is a mess. The show is poorly paced, cannot write a decent female character, and needs some serious script editing to make the narrative more cohesive, but god I still have a soft spot for the first couple seasons. Make Sherlock camp again 2023.
I'm rewatching/forcing my roommate to watch Sherlock for the 1st time. I haven't watched that show since 4.3 aired and 17 year old me swore on all that's holy I'd never watch it again.
I am, however, cursed with being hyperfixated on Sherlock in general and my roomie wanted to know what was so terrible about it. So back into the depths we go.
I'm going to update as we go for my own entertainment
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mmmthornton · 2 years ago
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Abbott Elementary D&D Episode WHEN baby?
What can I say, I'm a simple lesbian. I see a show with a great group dynamic and I gotta think about what they'd be like at the tabletop.
Plus, I'm...responsibly imbibing and putting off work so HERE WE GO!
youtube
Jacob becomes determined to start some kind of gaming club at the school, but he hadn't actually DM'd before so he asks the other teachers if he can do a "practice run" first and bribes them with takeout and beer to let him run a game for them in the gym in the evenings. Surprisingly Barbara has come around to it NOT being a tool of the devil thanks to her and her husband watching Stranger Things together ("If it can help those kids beat a demon and learn to appreciate family in the god-forsaken 1980s, it can't be all bad"). Melissa says she could learn a new game since its no fun card sharking the same five people at her local bar, and Gregory is pretending really really hard that he's not EXTREMELY excited about this because he's always wanted to play but never did as a kid. Ava laughs until she cries when Jacob first asks if she wants to join then flips when Gregory will be there..."and when those craft beers go right through his skinny hipster body" she wants to be there to see his "wild" side. Janine knows nothing about the game but is excited about a new extracurricular activity and thinks its a great way to bond with the kids, and Mr. Johnson wasn't invited but shows up with Coke and a Costco-sized bag of Smartpop because he KNOWS whats up.
Barbara : Definitely a Cleric. She is willing to physically fight Jacob though if she has to "choose a god" from the pantheon, so to keep the peace AND the immersive experience they agree Not To Go Into It but its enough that her healing and spells are faith-endowed. Early on though, she gets some REALLY good rolls to hit when they're surrounded by enemies and she becomes more of a "warcaster" in addition to healing. Lots of buffs and she gets into the idea of a powerful warrior who gives holy blessings with her presence. Probably should've chosen Paladin from the getgo with how she ends up playing, but she makes Cleric work for her.
Melissa : Definitely a Rogue. Okay, I promise all my thoughts aren't basic but also listen to me. The whole concept of the rogue network is SO up her alley. She almost seems like she's not even playing a character at first, but then JACOB surprises her with his NPCs and the two of them roleplay thieves cant as a sort of south philly slang. I think Jacob would be an AMAZing DM so he's ready to meet her where she is (not really invested at first, kind of skeptical on the whole thing), and draw her in by accurately using terminology and making the world feel gritty, lived-in, and familiar - and Melissa LOVEs it. She starts to really get into the fiction of this fantasy world and take the threat/plot hook seriously. Gets yelled at by the support for jumping into fights and going unconscious because she's not a tank class; maybe multiclasses into Barbarian or at least takes a feat or two so she's not going down every fight.
Gregory : The archetypal wizard; old, beard, pointy hat, the whole deal. I hear you thinking "Why not human fighter?" but no. Gregory will not do human fighter, he's been waiting to play D&D for like twenty years and hes researched EVERY aspect of every class. Could be a minmaxer, but moreso is just WAY overthinking the choice so finally Jacob just gives him a premade, high-fantasy, Gandalf-ass wizard named something like Geoffrey Jankins or whatever. Gregory spends a lot of time making his : [ face, worried that he's already destroyed his chance of "having fun in a tabletop game with work friends" because he's THAT kind of person. Once he relaxes, he starts to feel a lot more kinship with his wizard character; he's got a backstory in the premade sheet where he's trying to find a spellbook that was stolen from him that contained years of his hard work and research. Over the course of the game Jankins kind of works with the others the same way Gregory did as he warmed up to them as a substitute, and in the end has the Real Emotional Moment in-game as he realizes what his work was keeping him away from (the relationships with the others in the group being his found family). No one leaves that game with a dry eye.
Ava : Elf Bard, College of Swords. She refused to make a character when Jacob mentioned it involved adding numbers because she's too hot for math, so she got another premade that he knew she'd enjoy. She's actually pretty stoked on the idea of a Creative and Powerful Artist who's dripping with charisma enough that she actually gets the ins and outs of the spell rules really well and is very generous with her Bardic Inspirations ("even to Gregory's old-head-ass"). She does however seem to only use Cutting Words on her own team, specifically Janine ("Jacob! How could you let her use that spell?" "In my defense I didn't think she'd even read the spell sheet!"). I say College of Swords because the worst thing about being a bard is having to share the spotlight with someone else, so she decides she wants to be the hero AND the sexy song vixen who makes the ballad about it.
Janine : Some kind of Genasi or fey druid. She wants to connect with the nature in the world and tries to channel a kind of Pan-from-mythology-meets-Steve-Irwin-depicted-by-Simone-Biles character. Her character motivation is she wants to write a guidebook of the animals - both common and magical - that they come across but keeps absolutely failing her rolls. She rolls a one and slaps a Mystical Enchanted Forest Deer in the face, launching a fight that the party is NOT prepared for. IS very good in a fight; she'll transform into an owlbear and headbutt an enemy away if one of the other party members are in trouble. Only remembers how to use like, three spells total and doesn't tell Jacob that she has no clue how things like spell slots or materials work so she just doesn't track it / makes up a number when asked how much she has. Jacob catches on pretty quickly, but side eyes into the camera to let us know he's deliberately letting it slide because she keeps rolling badly and could use the break.
Mr. Johnson : Makes his own dwarf warlock who's ABSOLUTELY minmaxed to hell. The overall playstyle of the group though is more laid back, but he's after a harder core play experience and only drops in sometimes if he hears there's a boss fight. Can do things from the book that are completely legal but have Jacob looking up obscure status effects and rules to try to keep up. Would probably make a good DM, but says he's more of a Warhammer guy.
Jacob : Obviously the DM, but I imagine that once the kids get into the game one of them might want to take a turn DM'ing. Jacob, gleaming with pride, would be happy to pass the DM screen to the "younger, brighter, woker generation". He joins the party as a ranger ("...which in the fifth edition classic is not the most capable class however with updates and features can be utilized in very specific cases for role-play and battlefi-" "For f*cks sake Jacob just take a shortbow proficiency and lets get on with it"), and spends most of the time that they're playing being extremely proud of his student....until the kid catches him on a technicality on his animal companion range.
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kuroosweakness · 4 years ago
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more single dad!kuroo | sumi and her stuffed animals + special bath + talks about her lost tooth + school troubles + dinner 
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“what’s tim doing here?” 
the green sea turtle plush lays on his back, having stared at the ceiling for the past hour. 5-year-old sumi comes running through her dad’s room’s door with her hair flopping against her back with every step. 
“tim’s gonna stay with you today,” she informs kuroo and makes grabby hands at the turtle. naturally, kuroo plucks the plush off the mattress and places him in her hands. 
“oh? why with me?” an amused smile creeps onto his face. it’s always her and her stuffed animals. but oh, he can’t deny he doesn’t hearing all of the drama between her stuffed animals. apparently, the imagination of a 5-year-old is endless. 
sumi takes a good long look at tim and his green flippers. she scrunched up her face and makes a pouty face. “tim’s tired of the other mean animals and wants to gonna stay with you today,” she tells him, as if it’s the most obvious thing ever. “you’re not gonna be mean to him?” 
“course not,” kuroo huffs. he sits down on the carpet floor and sumi follows. “tim and i are great friends, right tim?” 
not to his surprise, tim doesn’t reply. sumi nods and places the turtle on her dad’s lap. “okay. tim’s staying with you today.” 
“mmm...” kuroo arches an eyebrow at her as she suddenly pulls out her dolphin plushie ...from under the bed? “daphne’s gonna stay with me too? wow, am i popular,” he teases. 
daphne, the blue dolphin, joins tim on kuroo’s lap. “she’s gonna stay with you too because the other animals are being mean.” 
“i see,” kuroo slowly nods and rests his chin on the palm of his hand. “who’s being mean to them? and why?” 
“the dinos! because they’re-” she points at the plushie on her dad’s lap. “-ocean animals so the others don’t like them.” 
“c’mere,” kuroo waves at her to come closer and she does. she plops herself right on her dad’s lap. her mischievous smile proves that she’s aware of squishing tim and daphne. “we’re gonna haveta wash your hair today,” he tells her while combing her hair with his fingers. 
“ooh, special bubbles?” 
he laughs. “no, not with special bubbles. gotta save water, baby....for sea turtles and dolphins like tim and daphne.” 
after bunching her hair into a small ponytail, kuroo sits back and lets her do a 360. “all done~” 
before she bounces out of his room, he calls out, “sumi, wait-” 
sumi turns around and looks at her dad questioningly. 
“you can’t-” kuroo gets up and brushes his pants, picking up tim and daphne from the floor right after. “-just let the dinos be mean to tim and daphne.” 
“i’m not,” she says. “i’m gonna teach them a good lesson right now.” 
before kuroo can say something, her eyes darken like the way they always do when she’s about to tell her dad something interesting. 
“do you know what they said to daphne once?” 
kuroo places the plushies on his bed and walks over to her. “what did they say?” 
sumi looks down at the floor and follows her dad out the door and to the kitchen. “they made fun of her because her smile” 
kuroo nods along, opens the top fridge door, and bends down to ruffle his daughter’s hair. “what happened afterwards?” 
sumi’s shoulders slump and her chest grows heavy. “she cried and they laughed. it-” she picks at her lips. “ because she lost her tooth and now her smile look funny” 
a small thud distracts her from her train of thought. kuroo says a small “oops” and picks up the jar lid that fell on the floor. he places the lid back on the counter and croutches down at sumi’s eye level. 
his eyebrows draw together; his eyes scans over her face for any signs he may recognize. “now, now” he rubs his palms against her shoulders soothingly. “they have no business making fun of daphne for something as natural as losing a tooth.” 
he knows his words aren’t much help, but he truly doesn’t know what else can make her feel better. kuroo’s glad she can’t tell how much her crying hurts him too. 
“besides, her smile does not look funny. i think she looks beautiful, and my opinion matters, doesn’t it? since has daddy been wrong?” he gives her a small smile in hopes that it’s a contagious one. 
she stifles a laugh and roughly wipes her eyes on her sleeve. “you got milk chocolate and dark chocolate mixed up!” 
he smiles and rolls his eyes. “well excuse me. they look like the same-” 
“nuh uh!...” she giggles. “at least you didn’t get white chocolate mixed up!” 
“it’ll be troubling if i did,” he laughs. his face softens at her. after a few more shoulders rubs, he asks, “is daphne feeling better about her smile now...?” 
she sniffles, inhales, and breaks into a sob. kuroo’s eyes widen as she presses her head against his chest. and suddenly, his grey shirt is her next tissue. 
“but no one else lost tooth” she chokes. it doesn’t take long for her teary eyes to release teardrop after teardrop. she hates this, hates being weak, hates how she looks with big, red, and puffy eyes. but at least she’s crying in front of her dad and not those boys at school...daddy wouldn’t laugh at her, ever. “it’s only me with big hole in smile” 
she pulls back and shows him the gap between her front tooth as if her dad doesn’t already know. “sumi-” 
“it looks dumb.” she frowns and tightens her hug around kuroo’s neck. “so so so dumb” 
kuroo continues rubbing and patting her back like the way he used to when she was younger, and couldn’t sleep at set times. “you know,” kuroo gently begins. “those mean people will lose their teeth later and they’ll have gaps in between their teeth too. plus, the tooth fairy wouldn’t give them money because she never awards mean people.” 
sumi sniffles and presses her eyes against her dad’s shirt to soak up leftover tears. 
“so not only did they lose a tooth, but they also don’t get money and have no right to be making fun of you.” kuroo slowly pulls back and examines his daughter’s tear-stained, red, scrunched up face. “after a quick face wash, you’ll be as good as new” 
sumi doesn’t reply and climbs on her dad’s back for a piggy back ride to the bathroom. 
he lifts her up and tightens his hold on her small thighs. as he starts walking, he sees her feet dangling by his side and wonders, where did her other sock go? he sighs and shakes his head with a tired smile, not another missing sock...
“sumi, i’m sure i’ve already told you this, but another tooth will grow back. an even stronger, better tooth!” 
the bathroom lights flick open and kuroo steps onto the tiled floors, setting his daughter on the counter and holding onto her thighs to prevent her falling off. 
he catches his reflection in the mirror and stifles a laugh. the neck area of his shirt is soaked with tears and snot. 
“daddy?” 
he looks up at her and her bunched up fists. “hm?” 
“can i take a special bubbles bath?” she points at the bathtub and puts on her best set of puppy eyes. naturally, kuroo’s weak heart makes him nod ‘yes’ before he can process what she asked. 
“really? yay~” she inches closer to the edge of the counter and- 
“woah woah woah,” he sets her down and lets her climb into the tub. sumi sets her clothes aside and sits patiently in the tub, waiting for her dad to turn the water on. 
“the water’s cold at first, remember?” he teasingly pinches her cheek, thankful that she mind is no longer on her fallen tooth. maybe he should have a talk with her kindergarten teacher-
“dad?” 
he looks up and wonders where the -dy went. 
“the water’s warm enough now!” she gives the water a few kicks and cups and handful before throwing it up and laughing. sumi treads across the water and grabs the colorful bath bomb she picked out at the store a while ago. 
kuroo turns the water off and she eagerly throws the bath bomb in. “...why’s it not melting? :((” 
with a quick look at the floating ball, kuroo chuckles and picks it right out the water. “there’s plastic wrapping around it, baby.” 
sumi’s mouth forms a small ‘o’ and watches her dad peal the wrapping away. “throw it in!” she tells him. 
he does just as she says and the two watches small bubbles form around the blue-turning water. 
“it’s blue...it’s red...it’s purple!” she cheers and throws her arms above her head. kuroo smiles in acknowledgment at the fact that she knows her colors well. 
~~~
“daddy?” 
there goes the -dy. thank goodness it’s back. “yes, baby?” 
she pokes at his arm that’s drying her off with a towel. “can i get more plushie?” 
“no more dinos though...” 
“course not! i want-” she taps her lips in thought and squeals when her dad’s cold hands comes in contact with her warm skin. “-i want more sea plushie” 
“how about a shark? sharks constantly lose and grow more teeth” 
“but sharks are mean” 
kuroo slips her shirt over her head. “not all of them,” he says. “a lot of sharks can be nice and we could name him or her-”
“what about ‘smark’?” sumi suggests. 
kuroo snorts. “’smark’? not sure if that’s a name or even a word, sumi...but if you’d like, then sure.” 
“daddy?” 
“yes?” he gives her hair some final ruffles and grabs a nearby comb. 
“you used to call me punkin” 
“...mm, and what about it, punkin?” 
“the kids look at me funny and laughed when you called me punkin” 
“did they?” kuroo sighs. “god, why are the kids in your kindergarten class so mean” 
“i don’t know,” she quietly replies. “they’re just like the dinos!” 
he frowns. “screw the dinos” 
sumi holds her belly as she laughs. “screw the mean boys and girls too” 
after a few final hair brushes, kuroo pats her head and grins. “my beautiful girl~” 
“pumpkin,” she corrects him.  
kuroo pulls back in surprise and slowly sets her back on the floor. “’my beautiful pumpkin’ sounds like i’m talking to the orange vegetable,” he chuckles. “i thought you didn’t like it when i-” 
“i do like it. and pumpkins.” she bounces out of the bathroom and jumps onto couch, like the way she always does after baths. “daddy would you be sad if tim and daphne not sleep with you today?” 
“i would be more than heartbroken,” kuroo jokes from the bathroom. he flicks the light switch off and pads over to the couch she’s sitting on. her mischievous smile grows with every step closer. 
“then i guess you have to be heartbrochon” 
kuroo dramatically gasps as he sits down next to her. “and you’re completely fine with me being heartbroken? just when i thought you loved me-” 
“i do! but i love tim and daphne more so they need to sleep with me today.” 
kuroo tries to hide his face of betrayal at the fact that he’s not first place in her heart, not second, but third–after two stuffed animals. 
“so....” she crawls closer to him to display her irresistible puppy eyes again. “can i have a shark plushie?” 
“just so your shark plushie can take my place in your heart?” kuroo teases and leans forward to grab the tv remote. “i’d be fourth place-” 
“no you won’t! my list goes-” she looks deep in thought as she counts her fingers. “teddy, daphne, buddy, tim, fried rice, you”
kuroo’s mouth gapes open as he slumps against the couch. “i come after fried rice?” he laughs. “even though i’m the one who makes it for you?”
she laughs with him. her laugh matches his well–both loud, genuine, and more like a cackle. “fine, you come before fried rice.” 
but not before your four other stuffed animals? he shakes his head in amusement. “i guess you’ll have to go to teddy, buddy, tim, and daphne to cook you dinner and tuck you in bed today~” 
he shrugs his shoulders in defeat and walks over to the kitchen. “it’s all too bad that i’ll have to enjoy my grilled mackerel all alone~” 
“daddy! you know how much buddy likes fish!” she grabs her polar bear off of the couch and marches after her dad. 
“he has great taste,” kuroo replies back. sumi glares at her dad and clings onto his leg as he washes the rice. 
“i’ll put you in first place if you buy me ‘smark’“ she playfully says. 
“ah...bribing won’t work on me, baby”
sumi huffs, releases her hold, clasps his sweatpants instead. “but you already number one on my list” 
“mm,” he hums back, unconvinced. conversations like these and teasing her are his favorite. he finds great joy in getting her riled up in little topics that might not matter to others, but means the world to him. 
“uh huh! you are!” she follows him to the fridge and widens her eyes at the sight of a popsicle. “can i have that?” 
“save it for dessert,” he replies back. 
“mm” she groans and walks over to pick up her polar bear that she accidentally dropped on the carpet. clink and clanks of pots and pans ring through the air as kuroo searches for the right pan.
“daddy? can i bring smark to school?”
“as long as if you don’t lose him,” he replies.
sumi’s face stretches into a wide grin. “does that mean you’ll get him for me? :)” 
kuroo lets out a long sigh. “yea, i probably will”
sumi bounces over to her dad again and beams. “you’re the best”
“yeah yeah” he laughs. “i was in like sixth place a few minutes ago”
“you always at number one,” she tells him as she goes on her tip toes to try to place her polar bear on the kitchen counter. she fails and buddy falls on her head.
“have i?”
sumi picks buddy up again and runs to her room. kuroo turns around at the lack of her voice and she suddenly runs back with her dinos.
“trash!”
kuroo’s eyes widen. “oh no no no, don’t throw your toys away”
“but they’re bad toys :(“
kuroo thinks about this for a second. “you gotta teach them to not be mean, give them a second chance, maybe they’ll become nice dinos”
sizzling sounds come from the pan and sumi smiles at the smell of fish. but quickly frowns again at her dinos.
“i guess,” she mumbles and runs back to her room. it doesn’t take long for her to run back out with teddy and buddy in her arms, her teddy bear and loose bear.
“i said you always been number one,” she tells her dad while scratching the side of her hair. “ask why”
“so you put me after fried rice to make fun of me?” kuroo teases.
“no? that was my list of ‘stuff i love’ not ‘people i love’ “
kuroo ponders this for a moment and reaches up for the little bottles of spice.
“so i’m on your ‘stuff i love’ and ‘people i love’ list? i’m a stuff and a person?” he chuckles.
“you’re number one on my ‘people i love’ list,” she says. sumi crinkles her nose at the smell of string spices. “and the only one”
“... i’m the only one? what about your friends? teacher? tim? buddy?”
“buddy’s a bear!” she exclaims like it’s the most obvious thing ever. “not person. and teddy’s my best friend, but he’s a bear too”
“mm... so no human friends?”
“nope, maybe you”
“maybe?” he laughs. “are we not friends?”
“you’re daddy! not friend”
“i can be friend and daddy at the same time!”
“but you can’t be daddy and fried rice at the same time”
kuroo stifles a laugh at her unexpected response. “that’s correct. do you ... does no one ....” kuroo bites his lip. how should he approach this topic?
“who do you sit next to during school?”
“amara and thomas” 
her response is quick, so she must know them well, right? sumi picks at the fluff of her polar bear and goes to sit on the carpet right outside the kitchen tiles.
“do they not talk to you?”
“sometimes,” she replies. she’s much more interested in why she suddenly sees a blue mark on her polar bear then the discussion with her dad right now. “buddy’s turning blue :(“
“...?”
“look!”
but kuroo doesn’t have the time to look away from the pan so he nods. “mm, we’ll give him a wash”
“okay”
“who else do you talk to during school?”
“mrs. chen” she frowns at the blue spot on her polar bear and checks to see if teddy has one too.
“anyone else?”
whew, teddy doesn’t have one. “sometimes amara”
with a click, kuroo turns the stove off and slides the mackerel on a white dish. “anyone else...?”
“no”
“ah... do you wish you have more people to talk to?”
“no, i talk to you all the time!”
“right, you tell me everything,” he beams. he brings a spoon to his mouth to taste the sauce.
“daddy why can’t guys make babies”
kuroo’s eyes widen as he splutters out the sauce. “...well, it’s just the way mother nature works”
“so you didn’t make me?”
kuroo avoids eye contact and rubs his neck sheepishly. “well..... it’s complicated and not something you should worry about”
“mrs. chen said i look like you, and she called me pretty. does that make you pretty?”
“...” conversations with a five year old can be quite amusing ... “it’s up to you,” he laughs. “do you think i’m pretty?” 
“i guess”
he laughs even harder at her dry response and quickly turns the conversation topic back around. “is school fun for you?”
“i guess”
“...” ah, there goes the painful short responses. “what do you guys do everyday-“
“daddy why do guys have to stand up when they use the bathroom-“
“remember buddy’s blue spot?” kuroo quickly butts in.
sumi’s eyes diverts back to her polar bear. “:(( buddy’s turning colors!”
kuroo lets out a long, heavy, and tired sigh. it’s been a long day for him as a parent and now he learns that his daughter doesn’t have any friends her age?
“buddy will be fine,” he reassures her and carries white dishes to the small dining table. sumi places a long kiss on buddy’s nose.
“daddy if you weren’t so tall i’d kiss you on the nose too”
before kuroo can say something, sumi changes the topic once again. “smark will be friends with tim and daphne.”
“mm”
“mrs. chen said that you’re really tall”
“...”
“she told ms. loren that you’re the most handsome dad”
“......”
“ms. loren whispered something about being my future mommy and it was really weird”
kuroo chokes on his spit and walks back into the kitchen quietly. “i-“
“i don’t want ms. loren to be my mommy” 
“oh you won’t have to worry about that,” he nervously chuckles. his daughter sure has a lot to say...he makes a mental note to avoid eye contact with ms. loren the next time he drops her off. 
“daddy do you like tim and daphne or do you pretend to?”
kuroo frowns as he cuts up some cucumbers. “why wouldn’t i like them? i like the way they make you happy”
“i think amara only pretend to like me” 
kuroo makes another mental note to consider transferring her to a new school. after a final slice, he puts the diced up cucumbers onto a small plate and grabs nearby spices. 
“maybe amara isn’t meant to be friends with you. sometimes, peoples’ personalities just don’t match up.” 
sumi sighs and slumps her shoulders. “i wish you can go to school with me instead of work” 
“i wish i can too” he laughs. “punkin, dinner’s ready. wash up” 
“ooh” sumi quickly sits up and dashes over to the kitchen sink step stool. “but you said you wouldn’t cook for me...?” 
“i can’t leave ya hungry,” he tells her. “besides, i’m your friend” 
“and my daddy,” she quips back. she turns on the sink and scrubs her hands with soap. “but not fried rice.” 
“mm, i’m not fried rice,” kuroo restates with a smile. “...do you like going to school?” 
“it’s fun sometimes, so. i guess.” sumi steps off of her step stool and happily bounces over to the dinner table. 
~~~
the night concludes with them eating dinner, kuroo asking more questions about school and buddy’s blue spot, sumi happily eating popsicle for dessert
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royallyprincesslilly · 3 years ago
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Title: Hibiscus Kisses {6}
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Chris Evans x OFC Ajali Rambaue AU {Ah-Jah-Lee, Ram-Bow}
Warning: Plot, Cursing, Angst, Blood, Lots Of Words, Death
Words: 8.3k
Summary: Ajali decides on a rash decision to go on a Disney cruise, not for her love of Disney, but because she needs time to figure things out after things get even more complicated in her complicated life. She only expected peace, quiet, tropical drinks, and an overabundance of Disney songs. What she got was more than she bargained for when the cruise of a lifetime on the brand new ship Enchantment turned into a nightmare. The only saving grace is that she’s not the only one living through the nightmare. Can Ajali survive the test of a lifetime and the dangers ahead of her, and better yet, will she finally be able to live a little?
Note: Please feel free to tell me what you think. I’m super excited to explore this one with you all. 🤗
As always, thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed this, please LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG! ❤️❤️
I appreciate each and every one of your guys’ support and love!
***VERY Loosely Edited/Proofread***
**Interactive**
Previous Chapters: {1} | {2} | {3} | {4} | {5} |
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You must have stood at the back of the yacht for a while because the shore and the docks were barely visible at this point. Every minute that ticked by you weighed your options of just diving in and swimming back. Everything you came up with seemed fine to deal with. So what if your hair got wet and you had to go through your four-hour wash and treat routine. So what if you attracted a shark or two, you could swim. So what if everything in your bag got drenched, you could replace them.
 With the number of rebuttals you came up with, you should have jumped in already. The major con that was flashing in your head in neon lettering was you are an adult and not a child who ran away from difficult situations. The sound of laughter had you turning around to see Chris laughing with Harper. He looked like he didn’t have a care in the world. Scoffing, you turned back around and crossed your arms.
 Almost a minute later you felt Chris standing beside you. “If you want to swim back I’m sure you could make it.”
 If looks could kill, the one you gave him should have done it. All you had to do was push him overboard to a watery grave. Chris lifted his hands to show his no threat status and that was when you walked away.
 “All right folks. It’ll be another forty minutes before we arrive at the best fishing spot in all of the islands. It’s my little secret. In the meantime, you have a choice of activities. You can go down below and marine watch, stay on deck and do some pictures and sights, or go into the bubble where you are surrounded by the ocean. It is optimal for fish watching. I’ll let you folks know when we’ve arrived.”
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You nodded and walked toward the steps that would lead below deck. You fully intended to get as far away from him as possible. Ignoring the way he turned to you as if he had something to say, you carefully went down the steps and to the back of the yacht. There you found what Harper was referring to. It looked like an actual bubble with two seats. Once you sat down you saw why this was mentioned as the most sought-after experience. You really felt like you were alone under the ocean and not apart from it but one with it.
You watched a school of yellow and black striped fish swim by and a small box popped up to the right of the screen with a still photo of the fish and a few listed facts.
 “Moorish Idol fish. These fish commonly inhabit tropical to subtropical reefs and lagoons. These fish usually travel alone or in small schools. These fish mate for life and adult males show aggression to one another.”
 Your jaw dropped. You hadn’t expected it to be high-tech. In front of you, you grabbed the flipbook and flicked through it to see a variety of sea creatures. The announcement of another fish brought your attention back to the ocean before you and that is where your eyes remained. Creature after creature swam by and up to the glass. Each one was announced and described. As they came up, you took pictures of the pretty ones you liked ready to show them to your family when you returned home.
 You were so wrapped up in fish watching that you didn’t notice that you weren’t alone until it was too late. Chris slipped into the seat beside you, startling you. Your harsh glare landed on him with the force of fifty blades behind it. He wasn’t looking at you though, his eyes were glued to the water and passing reef life.
 “Oh wow, Nemo and Dory,” Chris exclaimed inching closer to the glass.
 That was all it took for your attention to go right back, and lo and behold there were Dory and Nemo lookalikes.
 “Wow.”
 Mirroring Chris’s actions you slid to the edge of the seat as well and touched the glass. They were pretty in animation but that had nothing on real life. The orange and blue were so striking up close.
 “They’re even best friends in real life,” Chris quietly said.
 For the next few minutes neither of you spoke again you were too wrapped up in looking at all the fish that passed by one after the other. When you’d reached a part of the ocean where life was scarce, you sat back and crossed your arms.
 “Can I please explain?”
 You sighed and dropped your head back to rest on the hard headrest, keeping your eyes trained in front of you.
 “I promise I’m not this asshole you have me pegged as in your head.”
 “So you don’t go around trying to charm women out of your panties and in your bed for notches on your bedpost?”
 “God no!”
 You rolled your eyes not believing one word.
 “I solemnly swear that I am up to nothing but good,” Chris replied holding up three fingers.
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A smirk teased your lips at the Harry Potter line he’d just repurposed for his own use mixed with the Hunger Games salute. You shook your head unable to ignore how adorkably stupid he was.
 “You know those two have nothing to do with the other, right?”
 Chris slyly smiled and shrugged. “It’s sorta my thing. Sleeping around and I have nothing to do with each other also.”
 You snorted and shook your head. He was smooth.
 “You’re real smooth, I’ll give you that.”
 He sighed and turned his body more to you. “It’s a misunderstanding,” Chris began.
 “Let me stop you there. Ninety-nine point nine percent of the time anyone starts off with that, chances are there was no misunderstanding,” you dryly informed.
 “That high? Okay, then I fall in the point one percent.”
 You glared at him again but he didn’t back down, he held your glare but behind his eyes, you saw nothing but sincerity rather than the hostility you had spearing behind yours. When you didn’t object, he opened his mouth to speak again but you looked away.
 “There’s no need.”
 “Why won’t you let me explain?”
 You knew why. If he explained and the explanation seemed plausible and he looked sincere the chances of you believing it would be eighty percent and that was high. You would then continue spending time with him because you did enjoy his company and conversation and eventually sleep with him. Maybe. Letting him explain was step one that would lead to a series of missteps. Then you’d find yourself in a situation come the end of the cruise when both of you went your separate ways. There were too many what-ifs in the air.
 “Ah, I think I know. If you let me explain then this image you have of me being a womanizer who is after fast and quick ass, who would come on a cruise to chase women for a notch would be debunked. If it is debunked, then you’d have to admit that you liked spending time with me and enjoyed yourself. Then you’d have to admit that what might have happened if my phone didn’t ring wouldn’t have been a one-off. You’d have to face the possibility that there might be something here past our physical attraction.”
 Well damn, you thought. For a moment your thoughts betrayed the steely animosity in your eyes and you knew your shock shone through. You quickly looked away from him and tapped into your inner Elsa while watching a school of white fish pass by. You could feel him beside you staring at you as if trying to crack your resolve. You fought against him and kept your breathing slow and steady.
 “You don’t have to tell me I’m right. I know I am and it’s not because I’m a cocky prick. It’s because—,” Chris paused then sighed heavily before he continued. “I liked spending time—with you. Like really liked it and this was before anything physical happened. You’re funny and fun and not phased by this thing called fame that is wrapped around me. You probably don’t understand it, but that’s something refreshing and attractive to me.”
 Unable to resist any longer, you sneakily glanced at him while wondering if any part of what he’d just said was possibly true.  
 “Before I came on this cruise to get away from my life—run away from my life.”
 Your interest piqued. Why was he running away? Didn’t he have everything?
 “My friend, the one you heard on the phone was teasing me about the reason. I didn’t want to give him the real deal so I kept quiet which led him to the conclusion that it had something to do with a woman. It didn’t but he thought it. So the phone call was him stating his opinions again, his way of life. Now I’m not condoning what he said at all but that’s his life. I didn’t come here for any of that and that night wasn’t about that for me.”
 “What was it about?”
 You blurted the question without a thought and once you’d asked, you regretted it. The answer wouldn’t do you any good.
 Sighing, you looked back out to the water. “Don’t answer that.”
 And he didn’t. The silence stretched and your thoughts did as well. You contemplated his explanation and the probability of any of it being true. He had all the reason to lie right now, but the more you thought about it the more you guessed he didn’t need to lie being who he was. He could have just shrugged and put you on the side that wasn’t a fan of his and kept it moving.
 “Look,” Chris said shoving his phone to you with the text exchange between him and someone named Austin was visible.
 “I know what it is to be distrustful of strangers or everyone really and proof means a lot to me. Since the burden of proof is on my side, here it is.”
 You read through the exchange from a little over a week ago and sure enough, his friend Austin was scum. The irrefutable proof showed those sentiments were his and even showed Chris admonishing him for those sentiments and setting him straight. The banter that continued was Austin teasing him about his good boy behaviors. From the texts, you could tell they were close, and you could also tell that Austin was the asshole between them and Chris was possibly a good guy.
 Groaning, you looked away and dropped your head back to the headrest again. You did not need this. Sighing, you closed your eyes and listened to the silence. Several minutes passed by where neither of you spoke and just when you were going to Harper’s voice came in over the ship’s intercoms.
 “We have some dolphin action up here if anyone’s interested.”
 “Dolphins!”
 Your head snapped to Chris hearing the uncharacteristically excited squeal. Did he really just turn into a Powerpuff girl? Chris leapt to his feet and began walking toward the steps leaving you there to wonder just what kind of man he was.
 A few moments later, you emerged from below and walked to the railing to see a dolphin jump out of the water in the distance.
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“Oh my god!”
 At that moment you felt your smallness in the world. There were so many other creatures that were bigger and yet humans always thought themselves so superior. It was baffling.
 “It’s not always like this, they must be here to greet you folks,” Harper said as another jumped out and one swam up.
 You dropped down to your knees and peered over the railing and marveled at the aquatic beauty.
 “They’re so friendly.”
 Just then, a dolphin popped up showing its long bottlenose and black eyes and in the same breath, a stream of water came at you drenching you. In your shock, you just sat there while Chris and Harper heartily got their laugh in at your expense. To add insult to injury the dolphin even sounded like it was laughing. Who could be mad though? It was too cute. You looked across the way and saw Chris snapping pictures of you with a wide smile on his face. Being alarmed, snapping at him, or even telling him to delete the pictures would have all been acceptable reactions but you didn’t react in any of those ways. Instead, you brought your attention back to the dolphins in the water. Let him take his pictures, you thought.
 Twenty minutes later you were sitting at the side of the boat with your legs dangling over the edge enjoying the breeze, sun, and tranquility being on the ocean brought. There was something so serene about being in the middle of a giant body of water with creatures of plenty underneath its depths while there was nothing in sight for miles and miles. It was peaceful. The pictures you took of the horizon, the sky, and the water were breathtaking. You knew they’d make great printouts to add to your walls when you returned home. When you realized your battery was running low, you dug into your bag for one of your four fully charged portable chargers and slipped your phone into one of the many waterproof pouches you had your belongings secured inside.
 Your sister liked to make fun of you for how well you prepared for things. When you went out for every day, your purse contained every possible thing you would and could need for the day. You didn’t like being unprepared for whatever you came across and that included something as minor as rain all the way to the major things like abductions. You’d been the butt of many jokes but you didn’t care.
 Glancing to the other side of the yacht, you watched as Chris followed the instruction of Harper as he practiced a variety of sailor’s knots. It didn’t look like he was a novice though. You could tell he’d done it a few times before. Sooner than you could look away, Harper caught you then motioned you over. It would have been rude to ignore him, so you walked over to them and sat before them.
 “Here, try your hand at sailor’s knots,” Chris suggested holding out a length of rope to you.
 “It’s not as easy as it looks,” he followed up as you took it.
 “You look like you’ve done it before.”
 “Once or twice,” he replied.
 You studied the knots surrounding Chris for a few moments then took a stab at it. From the beginning you messed it up but didn’t quit, instead, you undid it and tried again. You didn’t quit easy. That was probably why you were in your current relationship predicament. A few minutes and several failed attempts later, you held up the finished product that looked identical to Chris’s.
 “So you have one of those brains where you can see something and replicate it?”
 You scoffed and shrugged. “Kind of. I just pick some things up quickly.”
 Chris nodded and held out another length of rope and pointed to a different pattern. “Try this one.”
 You knew it was a test. You grabbed the rope and studied the new pattern that was a lot more intricate than the first. Though it was more intricate it took you a shorter amount of time to start. When you held it up for them to see, less time had passed and you hadn’t made one mistake.
 “Wow,” Harper exclaimed before he chuckled.
 “What can I say, I’m pretty amazing,” you joked.
 Both men laughed but didn’t debate the fact.
 “We’re coming up on the cove that gives me the best fish. Of course, we’re catching and releasing, but it won’t dampen the experience,” Harper informed.
 Within a few short minutes, Harper had pulled up to one of the most beautiful coves you’d ever seen. The water was aquamarine crystal blue. It was so crystal like you could see several feet into it. The giant rocks that created a maze had moss growing off the tops of them that were lush green and created a nice contrast of colors. If you could have picked up this view and brought it home with you, you would have. It was that breathtaking.  
 You weren’t the only one thinking it, Chris was a few feet away snapping every picture he could get, only he didn’t look like a tourist. He looked like a professional travel photographer. When he dropped to one of his knees to get a different angle you just leaned against the railing and watched. The sun beaming down on him gave his hair a reddish hue which looked good on him. It even accentuated the freckles peppered along his arms. You remembered what was under that shirt of his at that second. You remembered the muscles, the hair, and the tats. It was an unexpected sight but one that you wouldn’t mind seeing again. Instantly you kissed your teeth and slapped your forehead.
 “Cut it out.”
 “Did you say something?”
 Chris was looking at you with a quizzical expression with his camera still posed up.
 “Nope, nothing.”
 He didn’t look like he believed you, but slowly he went back to snapping his pictures while you tried to create even more distance between you.
 “Get a grip, Ajali. It hasn’t been that long. You’re not affection starved either. Get—a—grip.”
 You took a few slow breathes and focused on the scene before you. You now understood why many people said this island was a top destination for vacations.
 “And we’re ready. You both said you’ve fished before, right?”
 You walked toward Harper’s voice then saw he had fishing rods, buckets, gloves, and all the other supplies lying at his feet.
 “I’ve done some fishing,” Chris offered before both sets of eyes landed on you.
 “Never.”
 “It’s not hard, I promise,” Harper assured bending for the rods. He held one out to Chris and the other to you.
 “Thank you.”
 “I’ll explain everything and its function. If either of you have any questions let me know.”
 Harper walked a few feet away leading the two of you to a shaded portion of the yacht. Once there, he explained everything in detail. He showed the parts of the rod, showed how to put things together, explained their function, and then went on to the different kinds of bait that were available. When he began demonstrating how to hold the rod and posture you paid close attention and imitated what he did. You knew though this was something that would take some getting used to.
 After twenty minutes, the three of you were in your spots ready to cast your rods. You watched Harper cast his first and it looked so fluid. You could tell he’d done this thousand of times. Then you watched Chris and though his movements weren’t as fluid, it looked like he was far from a beginner. You sighed and tried your best. The rod was heavy in your hands and affected your ability to control it and cast it perfectly. Glancing at Harper, he shrugged.
 “Good enough. You got it where it needs to go.”
 A soft chuckle escaped both you and Chris.
 “What kind of catch do you get out here?”
 Harper proceeded to explain the different kinds of fish he’d caught to Chris while you partially zoned them out. It didn’t take long for you to understand why people liked fishing. It was calming. You could leisurely do it while letting your mind drift and worries float away. Thirty minutes later it was your line that tugged first. You yelped then squeaked as you panicked.
 “What do I do?”
 “Reel it in,” Harper said.
 The resistance on the line was giving you a good arm workout. The struggle went back and forth. You doubted this was a baby.
 “This thing is strong.”
 “You got it, put your back into it like Ice Cube,” Chris teased making you narrow your eyes at him. That only made him laugh loudly.
 A few more moments of struggle persisted until you’d yanked the rod backward tucking it out of the water, over your head, and flopping the fish right on the deck.
 “Aaaah, oh my god! I caught a fish!”
 You jumped up and down excited by your success. Forgetting any prior slights you jumped closer to Chris and bumped shoulders with him.
 “I did it!”
 “You did.”
 “Good job. This here is a Barracuda,” Harper announced.
 “Ooooh Barracuda,” you and Chris said in unison like the song. The two of you giggled together before returning your attention to Harper.
 “It’s not an adult, but it’s no baby either. You want a picture?”
 “Yes!”
 You scurried to your bag and pulled out your phone then handed it to Chris before you dropped down to your knees and bent to the fish still flopping on the deck and smiled as you’d just won the lotto. Chris laughed and took the picture a few moments later. After the first few shots, you changed poses and let him take a few more. You watched as Chris’s face went from wide smiles to solemn confusion. Just as you were going to ask if your battery died, Harper spoke.
 “Do you want to do the honors of releasing it?”
 “You mean touch it?”
 Harper nodded and you ardently shook your head. “No thank you. I hear Barracudas like to bite.”
 Harper laughed at you as he effortlessly grabbed the fish by its tail then chucked it back into the ocean.
 “It was just an adolescent.”
 Chris held your phone out then walked back to his rod without a word. Slight confusion washed over you as you glanced at your screen to see one of the pictures he’d just taken, but your battery was fully charged.
 For the next few hours Chris barely spoke to you, but when you glanced over to him, his eyes were always on you before he looked away once yours met his. It was a complete turnaround from before. It shouldn’t have bothered or affect you at all considering the reality of things, but it did bother you a little bit. Once the three of you had had your fill of catch and release the sun was beginning to disappear. Harper caught a huge Mahi Mahi, scaled and fillet it right in front of you, and Chris showing off his impressive knife skills. He then took the fish to prepare what he promised would be the best open ocean fish you’d ever had. You were excited to see the finished product.
 Once Harper had disappeared down below you walked to the cooler, took out two beers, and walked over to Chris. He was sitting toward the back of the yacht watching the rocks in silence. You sat beside him, held out the beer, and waited for him to accept it. When he took it, he wasted no time twisting off the top and taking a mouthful. You sat there in silence looking over the view.
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“Who knew a celebrity could fish.”
 “I’m not a celebrity all day every day. I have hobbies and free time.”
 “I take it fishing is a hobby?”
 “When I can get to it. Sometimes I can’t go off the grid to do it.”
 You nodded and tried to picture him at a lake with a rod and bucket of bait catching fish. A soft smile spread across your face before you gulped your beer.
 “What’s one of your hobbies?”
 Taking a deep breath you slowly released it. “Painting.”
 “You’re artistic?”
 “Depends what you call artistic. I can slap some paint on a canvas and call it a day.”
 Chris looked at you for a few moments. “Somehow I find it hard to believe it’s as lowkey as you’re describing. I bet you’re a modern-day Frida Kahlo.”
 You smiled and shrugged. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
 Silence spread between you again and the two of you sipped from your bottles. It was a semi-comfortable silence.
 “Are you departing tomorrow or staying on?”
 You wanted to ask why he wanted to know but decided against it. “Staying on.”
 Chris nodded. “Me too.”
 Neither of you spoke again, instead, you watched the sky as the sun slowly began its descent behind the water. When Harper returned, the air filled with such a delicious scent that your belly grumbled loudly.
 “And dinner is served. Harper placed the platter down on the table and you and Chris walked over to it. Your jaw dropped in amazement.
 “What kind of kitchen do you have down there that can produce that?”
 “I’ve had tons of practice.”
 The Mahi Mahi that was alive less than two hours ago was now cooked to perfection and decorated with papaya, and a green salad.
 “Wow, this looks mouthwatering,” Chris complimented.
 “It’s nothing fancy, just some fish with a papaya and seaweed salad.”
 “Seaweed salad? Oh wow. You utilize everything huh.”
 “Absolutely. I can tell you more about using everything you can to not only survive but make good food,” Harper said motioning you both to sit down.
 “No one is serving you here, help yourselves there’s plenty.”
 The three of you dug in taking portions of fish and salad. When you took a bite of the Mahi Mahi your eyes rolled to the back of your head. “Oh my god. This is so good.”
 “All it needed was some salt, pepper, and lemon. Sometimes keeping it simple is the best way.”
 Chris moaned and nodded in agreement with you. “Delicious.”
 As the three of you ate, Harper told you all about his travels and time living on his own on the ocean and how he’d learned to survive on little to nothing. It was so interesting to hear his story. From it, you gathered he was determined, creative, meticulous, and persevering. He didn’t let anything stop him and because of that mindset, he said he’d seen a lot of wonderful things and had a beautiful life. Listening to him speak about his loves and losses and how it was just him in the end you couldn’t help but think about your relationships.
 When he began listing off the life lessons he’d learned you made note of each and every one of them. You always thought the stories of the older generations were interesting. While most of their experiences were relatable, a lot of it wasn’t because of the difference in eras. In Harper’s era being a bachelor past twenty-two was seen as taboo, yet that was the life he lived. When he spoke of when he did get married, it was to the one woman he’d loved since he was twenty years old. The woman he’d been stupid about and missed out on two times. From the way he spoke about her, you knew she was his soul mate.
 Glancing to Chris who was sitting diagonally from you, part of you wondered how relatable Harper’s experiences were to him. You thought back to the very few tabloid and gossip stories you’d read about him but nothing jumped out to you. The tabloids didn’t focus on one woman that he was possibly seeing, they didn’t highlight any crazy behaviors with any of them or even highlight breakups. That was part of how you’d pieced him together. The lack of information left for such a wide breadth of possibilities to put together.
 “Take it from me young ones, when you’re walking down a dimly lit street of soft lights, and you happen to find that anomaly among the sea that shines a different light and makes everything else pale in comparison you do whatever it takes to hold on to that. You fight for it and don’t let anything or anyone make you miss out on it. None of us are here for a long time. One day I’ll join my Angie and we’ll be together again. I welcome that day, until then I’ll keep drifting.”
 The three of you sat there in silence, each of you lost in your thoughts and worries. Was Javii that anomaly or was he part of the sea and you’d been mistaken this whole time? When Harper returned to the helm to captain you back toward land you were secluded from the rest of them and still lost in your thoughts. It had been days since you left and you’d figured out nothing. If anything, you’d added more to your plate to think about. This was what you hadn’t wanted to do and that was the reason you chose this option rather than staying in the city.
 You began to wonder again about the person who would be that anomaly that Harper spoke of. Rather than thinking of your experiences with Javii, your irresponsible mind thought of your run-ins with Chris. When you’d seen him in passing before boarding the ship you’d noticed him in the sea of people and amidst every chaotic thing happening around you. Your brain singled him out. It did it again when you saw him in passing topside when you’d met Genevieve and in the lounge club. It was something you hadn’t focused on before but now it was all you could think of.
 “Get a freaking grip, Ajali!”
 You smacked your head and dropped it down hunching over to hug your shins. Suddenly, you felt raindrops and those drops quickly turned into a waterfall.
 “What the--,” you began holding your hands out confused how a downpour like this could just suddenly start.  
 Unexpectedly, the ship lurched hard to the left sending items on the deck toppling over including your beer bottle and the empty ones around it. Thinking quickly, you grabbed the railing to not tumble. Your grip was precarious thanks to the downpour and you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold on for long. Just as you were losing your grip, that was when the ship lurched again only this time to the right. With no time to grab for the railing, you tumbled over but before you hit the deck arms wrapped around you stabilizing you.
 “I got you.”
 Glancing up, you found Chris with rainwater pouring down his face and beard. He was holding on tightly to one of the metal poles while holding you tightly in his other arm. When the rocking went from deadly to manageable, Chris slowly let you go.
 “Something must be wrong. Let’s go.”
 Both of you took off on the search to find Harper. Every few seconds the rocking of the ship made items fall and roll. Chris was the one to pull you in every which direction to help you avoid the bigger items. When the ship bucked back you both slid back.
 “Aaah, fuck!”
 A sharp slice caught you off guard making you fall to the deck. Before Chris could react the boat rocked again sending you rolling back a few feet. When you slammed into one of the walls you shouted out in pain. Seconds later Chris was bent before you.
 “Are you okay?”
 His eyes quickly scanned your body and found your bleeding foot.
 “Oh god.
 Chris quickly pulled off his tropical printed shirt, ripped it, and began wrapping your foot.
 “I’m sorry I have to do this tight to hopefully slow the bleeding,” Chris informed before he yanked the material, knotting it tightly around your injury. You tried to stifle your groan but it didn’t work. Your shout echoed across the open water and carried it competing with the downpour from the sky.
 “I’m sorry. Ready to keep going? We’re almost there.”
 You nodded and let Chris help you up. With his arm around your waist and yours draped over his shoulder the two of you hurried to the small enclosure where Harper was steering the boat. Every so often thanks to the falling and rolling items you and Chris looked like circus performers, jumping, dodging, and sliding out of harm's way. The way Chris managed to go into protector and alpha mode had you seeing a new side to him. Women did love a man who could take charge.
 When you finally made it you found Harper passed out on the floor.
 “Oh my god!”
 Chris placed you along one of the windows so you could lean against it before he dropped down to his knees to check for a pulse. The longer it took him to turn to you, the more anxious you became.
 “He has a pulse, but it’s thready. Looks like he may have hit his head,” Chris informed before he ripped the while men’s tank he wore at the hem and pressed it to Harper’s forehead.
 On impact, Harper groaned then bolted up.
 “Hey, take it easy,” Chris shouted trying to compete with the loudness of the ocean and the rain.
 “No. Storm. We’re in a storm. We call these pop-ups. They happen all the time,” Harper explained as Chris helped him to his feet.
 “If you knew it was coming--,” you began.
 “I didn’t. No one can predict these and they’re increasingly more dangerous.”
 The yacht whipped as if it were a leash sending all three of you knocking into whatever was closest. Immediately the pain that whisked through you had you screaming. That was the first time you thought you were going to die. All you could feel was pain, all you could hear was the sound of your heart beating. You slowly opened your eyes but couldn’t make anything out through the haziness. You couldn’t pinpoint where the pain in your body was coming from, it felt like it was everywhere.
 “Ajali!”
 Snapping your eyes open you saw Chris’s drenched and concerned face before you. “Open your eyes. Stay with me!”
 It was a forceful command. One that you slowly obeyed. He helped you to a sitting position then turned back to Harper who was trying to stand to look over the built-in equipment of the ship.
 “We’re way off course here. Somehow this storm has put us way off route. It makes no sense.”
 “What does that mean?!”
 “It means we’re drifting and not towards the islands. We’re drifting away.”
 “What!”
 Harper tried to turn the key for the engine but it stalled then sputtered. He tried it again and again but the result was the same.
 “This is bad,” Harper added.
 “What do we do?”
 The ship rocked again but this tilt was so drastically different. It actually went so far on its side that it felt like you were going to capsize.
 “We’re gonna tip over!”
 Chris ran from the small room fighting against gravity’s pull to yank him over. Your first thought was he was leaving you.
 “Hang on tight!”
 Your scream was so loud you doubt you’d ever gone that high before. Terror gripped your heart and your entire life flashed before your eyes. You were certain you were done for. There was no way to make it out of this. You began mumbling but you didn’t know if what you said made any sense. A few seconds later, the ship dropped back into the water allowing you to remain top side up. You felt hands on your body and you opened your eyes to Chris shoving your arms in a bright orange life vest.
 “I could only find one right now so it’s yours.”
 “What—what about you?”
 “I’ll be fine. Hold on tight.”
 He spun around looking at Harper.
 “I have to get below.”
 Harper hurried out without another word and Chris turned back to you.
 “I’m going to help him. Stay here.”
 He made a move to leave and you grabbed his hand pulling him back to you.
 “Don’t leave me.”
 “I’m not. I’m going below with Harper. I’m sure he’ll need my help. I think it’s safer for you up here.”
 You still held tight to his hand fear controlling your movements. Chris’s expression softened before he took a step close to you to hold you at the side of your neck to the base of your skull.
 “I swear to you I won’t leave you, no matter what. We’re in this together. I will be back and we’ll laugh about this one day. For that day to come though we have to get through this and I have to help him down below. You’ll be safe. Hold on tight, stay low.”
 You nodded and took a few breathes trying to psych yourself up.
 “You got this,” Chris said before he pulled away and walked from you.
 You closed your eyes and said a silent prayer hoping for him to come back and that his words weren’t bullshit.
 The seconds seemed to slowly tick by and the minutes went on for lifetimes. Every jolt of the ship leveled you to a whimpering mess. You did just as Chris has instructed—kept low and held on for dear life. You didn’t care how numb your hand became from gripping the cold metal for so long you kept holding on. You didn’t care how cold you got from not only the ocean water but the rain and the strong wind gusts, you remained in your corner shivering refusing to come out. It didn’t matter how much the pain you felt intensified the colder you got you ignored it and kept whispering your silent prayers. You didn’t want to die. Not like this.
 You heard something like a loud crack then the groaning of metal then the ship once again tilted. You screeched and tried to hold yourself to the railing but the further the boat tilted the harder it was to hold on.
 “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!”
 You screamed again and braced yourself to end up in the water under the boat, but instead of it tipping it once again dropped back onto the water’s surface.
 “Oh my god!”
 “Ajali, can you hear me?”
 You whipped your head around trying to find where the voice was coming from without letting go of the railing. You were too scared.
 “Ajali. Can you hear me!”
 On the dashboard, you saw a red light flashing and guessed it was the radio. The only problem was for you to get to it, you’d have to let go and walk over to it. If the yacht tilted again you’d slid your ass out the room and off the boat. It was a risk.
 “Ajali, pick up. We’re down here trying to fix the engine but we need you to turn her on for us. Can you do that?”
 “Fuck!”
 You slowly stood, fighting against your aching joints, bones, and muscles, and stood upright with most of your weight on your uninjured foot. You assessed the distance from where you were to the dashboard and knew slow and steady was the best way but you doubted you had that time. You took a deep breath and took three hops on your good foot toward the dashboard. When there was just one hop left to take the vessel rocked sending you off balance and smack dab into the glass with your face.
 At this point, there was no part of your body that wasn’t in pain. A metallic irony taste filled your mouth and you knew you were bleeding. You had no idea from where though, your face was completely numb.
 “Ajali!?”
 Using the back of one hand, you wiped across your mouth and took another deep breath, and hopped to the dashboard throwing yourself across it and holding it for dear life. You took a few moments to calm yourself then grabbed the walkie.
 “I’m here.”
 You heard Chris exhale as if he was relieved. “Thank god, I thought something happened.”
 “I’m fine,” you lied while trying to wipe away the blood that dripped across the dashboard.
 “Try to turn the engine on.”
 You twisted the designated key all that happened was a long exaggerated sputter then hiss.
 “This time keep it turned don’t release it,” Chris suggested.
 Doing as you were told, you waited and begged the engine to cooperate. When you heard a yell over the walkie you knew it wasn’t good.
 “Damn it! There’s water in the engine. The only way to even begin to work on it is for it to dry out. That’s gonna be impossible during a storm. It’ll just keep flooding. We’re not moving. Damn it!”
 There was a full range of banging over the walkie that only made you panic more.
 “Can everyone not fall apart right now? Please. I’m terrified enough as it is,” you pleaded.
 “Listen to my voice, it’s okay. We’re coming back up. We just have to weather the storm,” Chris said. His voice sounded like he was panicking but was also trying to showcase calm. You heard both.
 Another loud crack echoed but it wasn’t on your end, it was over the walkie.
 “What was that?”
 The sound rang out again and everything went dead silent over the walkie before a loud crash of something breaking echoed out. At that moment the ship lurched again only this time the groan of metal was so loud it made you shake from fear. Garbled speech went in and out over the walkie alarming you.
 “He—hello?”
 The only response you got was the walkie dying.
 “Hello? Hello?” You pressed buttons and turned switches not knowing what any of them did but hoping one of them brought communication back.  Nothing helped though.
 “Chris! Hello? Chris! Answer me goddamn it!”
 You threw the corded walkie and dropped your head down and wailed. There was no hope at all you thought.
 “I’m gonna die.”
 You cried, finally letting out the angst and terror you were feeling. There was nothing positive about your current situation. You were in the middle of the ocean, practically alone while a storm was raging around you. people went missing like this, people died like this. You were suddenly so tired. A wave of water brushed against your feet but you didn’t think anything of it. You almost couldn’t lift your head.
 “Ajali!”
 As you lifted your head you saw Chris racing toward you.
 “We have to get off this ship.”
 “What!”
 “The glass broke. We’re taking in water and sinking—fast!”
 Hearing those words you found the energy to rise. “What do we do? Where’s Harper?”
 “He’s lowering the life raft. Let’s go.”
 Chris wrapped his arm around your waist and helped you along. When you made it down the steps to the deck you saw that it was completely filled with water.
 “Oh my god.”
 “It’s all right, I have you.”
 He must have gotten tired of your hobbling because he scooped you up and hurried along treading through the now calf-level water.
 “You’re freezing cold,” Chris mumbled.
 “What are we gonna do?”
 Chris reached Harper who looked as if he’d been through hell. From one glance you could tell he was hurt.
 “Climb down first,” Harper said to you as Chris put you down.
 You flinched as the saltwater wreaked devastation on your injured foot.
 “I’m scared.”
 “I know. it’s expected, you’re human. I need you to work through that fear though and climb down into the raft,” Chris reasoned.
 You nodded and tried to get over not only the terror but also will your muscles to move through them being near frozen. You tried to move your legs in some coordination to climb over the railing but it was taking a bit of time on your own. Chris stepped closer and helped you to take the first step down the ladder. When your injured foot joined your other one it slipped and sent you down a few of them only stopping when you were able to get a grip on the metal.
 “Are you okay?”
 “I’m okay.”
 You slowly went down the remaining steps until you got to the last one and saw you’d need to jump off the railing to land in the raft. You took a few breathes, hoped that you made it in the raft and not in the ocean, and jumped. Landing on your back you couldn’t relax. It hit you that you were now in a life raft about to drift to god knows where. From above you heard the two men arguing back and forth over who should go next. When you saw Chris was the one climbing down the ladder you knew Harper had won.
 It didn’t take him nearly as long as it took you. A few seconds later he’d jumped in next to you. The strong scent of gas immediately hit you.
 “You smell like gas.”
 Chris smelled himself then his eyes widened and pointed back to the ship. The two of you looked up just in time to see Harper bringing back up the ladder.
 “What’re you doing? Come down!”
 “No can do brother. This here is my ship and a captain always goes down with his ship.”
 Your eyes widened in horror. He couldn’t be serious.
 “That’s not funny Harper. The gas is leaking, there is no saving it. It isn’t worth your life. Come on, there’s time for you to save yourself too,” Chris rebutted.
 “I’m long past saving,” Harper said lifting his shirt to show the large shard of glass that was sticking through his abdomen. It looked like it had gone right through him. You knew that if it were removed the chances of him living were zilch.
 “Oh my god,” you mewled before clamping your hand over your mouth to stifle the wail that followed.
 “Harper--,” Chris began but never finished.
 “I always knew I’d die on this ship and that’s all right. I’m at peace with it. If I get in that raft with you I’d be doing you a disservice. Sharks would be on your tail in no time.”
 Harper flung a pack over the railing into the raft.
 “I’ve already pre-packed all the emergency packs in the raft. They’re in the side compartments as well as underneath the zipped platform of the bottom. These are things you’ll need wherever you wash up.”
 Another bag followed the first and landed on the raft. “This one is some rations. Remember to conserve the water. You can survive without food longer than water.”
 You cried louder while using your hand to muffle as much of the sound as you could.
 “Come on man,” Chris pleaded.
 Four more bags followed including your backpack. By then you’d fully lost it and had ventured into a nervous breakdown.
 “Inside the raft, there is a transponder. I am going to set off the homing beacon on my ship it’ll give search and rescue some idea of where things went wrong. They’ll be able to follow the signal and rescue you no matter where you are.”
 Harper bent forward and groaned. He must have been in so much pain you thought to yourself. On its own, your hand gripped the ripped hem of Chris’s tank and held it tightly. Chris glanced back at you and you saw the same anguish you felt.
 “I’m sorry about this folks, I really am.” He paused and shook his head before he continued. “You have each other though.”
 An explosion shook the vessel and lit up the sky behind Harper.
“That’s my cue. Get outta here. I’ll do my part. Remember live your way, it makes death a peaceful conclusion.”
 With that Harper hobbled away holding the railing.
 “Go!”
 He disappeared from view leaving the two of you sitting in the raft, in the pouring rain heartbroken and terrified. Another explosion erupted and Chris sprang into motion yanking the cord that controlled the motor startup. He yanked it once, then twice until it sparked alive on the third try. You both looked to the ship unsure what to do. The decision had been made for you, there was nothing either of you could do but go.
 Slowly the raft began to drift away from the sinking ship and neither of you could peel your eyes away. Two more explosions boomed and then Harper’s voice echoed out.
 “I’m coming, Angie!”
 “Oh my god,” you whispered dropping your head to the surface of the raft. Your cry was loud and showcased the tragic sadness before you.
 You watched on before another and final grand explosion ripped the ship apart sending parts every which way.
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“Fuck!”
 Chris leapt for you throwing his body over yours using himself as a shield to protect you. The sound of flying metal around you only made you scream more and more. Still, Chris didn’t come off of you, he kept his body over yours while maneuvering the rod steering of the raft. After the sound of flying metal subsided and the warmth of fire died down Chris rolled off of you. There was nothing to be seen except the fire from the explosion that was quickly being extinguished as the rest of the ship sank to the depths of the ocean.
 “Oh my god, Harper.”
 “God,” Chris groaned out, dropping his head down. “Rest in peace.”
 There it was. Death. It was staring you right in the face and you feared it hadn’t had its fill quite yet. Your sobs returned and soon they were the only sounds traveling across the water, along with the motor. Neither of you spoke for a few minutes as you both tried to digest everything that had just happened and how everything had gone so wrong.
 “What’re we going to do?”
 It was a question asked just above a whisper. A question that held so much uncertainty, a question that also brought so much fear with it. What were you going to do?
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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superlinn02 · 3 years ago
Text
Polkadot man x fem reader (part 1)
Obs:this story doesn't contain any mentions of she or her but it is implied that you start at the female part of the prison just like ratchatcer
Info:this will probably have some spelling mistakes because English is not my first language. This story might not be great because it's my first in awhile. Thanks for understanding
You shouldn't be here, you didn't fit in here. Well at least that's what you think, the ones that put u in this God forsaken prison seemed to think otherwise. I men sure you killed a cupel of people but they were gonna kill you first they just didn't get the chance.
Either way now you were stuck in this shit hole, not that living in the streets of Gotham were much better but at least you where free there. Here you were still the outcast you were out in Gotham, no friends and people acted like you didn't exist but that was all you had ever known so you didn't mind too much.
But then the day came, Waller walked in and apparently you were now part of a team. They all looked like idiots in your opinion well at least the ones you have meet so far, peacemaker, bloodsport and king Shark you thought their names were. Cleo you already knew of, not that u had ever talked to her,and that was it you thought until Waller backtracked to the guys wing again.
The man in front of u looked sad and if the eyes truly were the window's too one's soul, his showed everything about him at least to you. The frown on your face was probably very visible when you realized that all the information you were gonna get about this man was that they call him polkadot man. How was that fair even you had gotten more of an introduction and their really wasn't much to say.
The debriefing came and went and now you were sat between cleo and Abner krill as you learnt his name was in the helicopter. It was pretty awkward and your social awkwardness didn't help at all so you let the others handel the talking.
"so what do we do when we land?" it was Cleo asking.
"we won't land, we are gonna jump into the water. Less noise." peacemaker answered fast. One could easily tell he wanted to be the leader but had to deal with not getting his way.
Abner hadn't really talked efter telling you all his name but then again neither had you. But hearing the word swimming made that change real quick.
"whoa! whoa! Hold up nobody said anything about swimming!" you quickly stated before anyone could change subject again.
"yes, you have a problem with that?" this time it was bloodsport that answered.
"no, I just don't like getting wet." you said while looking at your hands. You didn't really want anyone of these "super villians" to know you were a bad swimmer.
You didn't get to dwell on it for too long however because in the corner of your eye you saw a small movement. You shifted so you could get a closer look at what was happening only to see Abner trying his best to hide something on his neck.
You were about to ask him if he was okay but before you could get the chance it was time to get in the water. It went surprisingly well, at least thats what you thought. You probably looked like you were in fact drowning, but at least you made it. You all made it to the shoore and went on to make camp.
You were at the back of the group on the way to your camp spot and that's when you saw it. Abner neck had a bump, that wasn't the weird thing however, nope the weird thing was that it was glowing a in your opinion quite beautiful blue.
"hey, are you okay?" you wisper to him. You didn't wanna make a big deal out of it, but something in you at least wanted to make sure he was okay.
He seemed to freeze up before a quick yes escaped his lips and he continued walking without so much as looking at you.
It may have seemed rude to others but you didn't mind. He seems like a withdrawn kind of person but so were you so you completely understood. However, much to your dismay and probably Abners too the others in your little group also noticed what had happened to Abner.
"hey! What happened to your face?" peacemaker asked seeming more concerned over himself other than Abner.
"it's just a rash" it came out fast and quiet, as if Abner were scared that if he talked louder something bad would happen.
"that's a rash?!" it was peacemaker again seemingly more self concerned then before.
Not much more was said about the subject and that seemed to please Abner. You however was curious now and hade to at least try and get him to talk to you. There was something about him that was drawing you in, something that actually made you want to get to know him be his friend. Hmm a friend now that wasn't something you had a lot of.
The campsite was not much of a campsite at all but you felt it better to keep your mouth shut. But this felt like the perfect moment to get to know Abner or anyone in this squad for that matter. However when you turn to look for Abner he was gone, probably took the first opportunity that he got to get away a bit. So you decided to see what Cloe aka ratchatcer 2 was up too.
Not before long everyone except you seemed to be sleeping. You were sitting on a log staring at the scenery when a rustel startled you. Your eyes snapped to Abners sleeping bag only to see that the bumps hade been growing and started to disform his pretty face... Wait pretty? When was that something you thought about anyone? Maybe being doomed to die did something to you.
But you didn't get to dwell on it for too long because as quickly as he hade moved he had moved on to the bushes right besides your camp. You were thinking about going after him and make sure he was okay but you didn't even get the chance to stand up before a rainbow of sorts seemed to be coming frome the bush.
Without even noticing you where sneeking closer and closer to what you assumed was Abner. You got about halfway there before he came back out looking exactly like at the prison before you left,well expect he had his undershirt on instead of his costume.
"are you okay? And I don't want you to brush it off this time." in hindsight you maybe sounded a little demanding but you didn't like death so you wanted to make sure.
"yes, I comes with my powers. It won't infect you I promise." his answer shocked you. Had nobody cared about him and just asked because they were scared? That didn't sit right with you at all.
"I wasn't asking because I was afraid, I was asking because I don't want you dead." you said that and then immediately regretted it. You didn't meen to sound so concerned and scared but in truth you were, so you guessed that was the reason.
However neither you nor Abner didn't get to think on it, because one of your team mates tried to eat another one of your team mates. The shark still scared you a bit but he seemed to agree to not eat you so it was a step in the right direction. That didn't mean you weren't taking precautions, you took your sleeping bag and moved it to where Abner was sleeping.
In the morning you were surprised to wake up to brown eyes watching you. It didn't make you uncomfortable at all, it made you feel seen and in a weird kinda way you hoped he would look at you more. But he didn't seem the kind to like eye contact.
The moment however was quickly broken by bloodsport yelling to get up and get our asses on the move. Apparently we were to find someone named Rick Flag. The camp he was being held at wasn't to far away and when you got there you weren't surprised that bloodsport and peacemaker were having some kind of killing contest.
You didn't do much because of your dislike to killing people so while they were brutally making their way through camp you quietly followed after. But you got wreckless and when you though everyone was dead you went out in the open. That was your mistake because a second later you heard guns clocking and people saying stuff you couldn't understand. You really thought this was it your last time on earth your last living moment, and your eyes went to his. At the time you didn't know why but it felt right.
His eyes weren't on you tho, no they were focused on something behind you. Before you knew what was happening he moved and stretched out his arms. Out of them came what you could only discribe as polkadots, quite beautiful if you got to say so.
You could only hear the comotion behind you and then the world was quiet again. Your eyes never left him and you could only wagly hear peacemakers comment about the polkadots. You desperately wanted to thank Abner in whatever way you could. But the moment was cut short by Abner himself.
"sorry it's so flamboyant" was all he said still not really looking at anyone.
"I think it's beautiful" you heard yourself say. You wanted to smack your hand over your mouth but the words had already left so what was the point.
Everyone else didn't really seem too care and quickly went to check on flag. And when you also started to turn around and leave, you chought his eyes again but only for a moment. You could feel your cheeks getting warm at that, damn him and his pretty eyes! But that also when you heard it, so quiet but still there.
"do you really mean that?" it was Abner, still behind you but seemingly closer.
"Of course I do, I may be the bad guy but a lier I am not." you said while turning to face him again. When you saw his face again you gave him a smal smile but a genuine one, then turned around to meet this new person you had never herd of before.
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wildlyglittering · 4 years ago
Text
My Gift to You
I received an anonymous request to write something about Nesta and Rhys’ relationship post ACOSF and them having a conversation. The requestor said that their relationship didn’t feel genuine enough and that they had a lot of work to do before they consider themselves brother/ sister.
I mean.... same anon. Same. The relationship was definitely not one of happy families in my eyes and personally Rhys buying Nesta gifts just felt like the cheapest way to close the lid on their ‘relationship.’
I don’t know if this is what anon wanted but I just can’t write a future where those two truly bond and get along. So this is Nesta and Rhys as I feel would be most appropriate.
***
‘Brother,’ she’d called Rhys. It was not a word which drifted from her lips as easily as it did from Feyre’s when she used the term to refer to Cassian, or for Cassian himself when he spoke of his kin.
Brother.
There had been no time for thinking, not with the screaming and shrieking and the copper tang of blood filling her nose. Rhys was losing his mind and the healer, Madja, was next to useless, pleading with Feyre to fight death - an act as impactful as a raindrop at the bottom of the ocean.
If fighting death were easy, everyone would win.
Nesta knew if you needed to beg for a life, you needed to beg to what could heed you.
The memory of what transpired for Nesta, when she stepped from one form into another, had faded over time like some strange fever dream.
There had been a presence swimming next to her, a shark with a sharp fin and razor teeth, twisting and arching, waiting to tear from her what she had torn out first. But something else was with her, someone else, with a golden light to illuminate Nesta’s way.
Something given and something gained. Those were the thoughts floating in her mind once she’d been present again.
Nesta sought out the opening of Feyre’s eyes, desperately listened for a new-born’s wail and thankfully, she received both.
Afterwards, in the calm, long after she’d embraced Rhys, Nesta wondered what she had meant by that word - brother.
Even as she cradled Nyx’s delicate head in the nook of her arm, stroking the tufts of downy black hair, she didn’t think of him as someone she shared with Rhys. No, despite the hair and sleepy violet eyes, he was someone Nesta shared with Feyre.
Sister. That was a stronger word.
The first infant Nesta ever held was Feyre. She remembered a scrunched up red face peeking behind a blanket as her new baby sister was placed in her arms while a toddler Elain sobbed in the background, upset at not being baby anymore.
I already have one of these.
That was her first thought, her first memory of Feyre.
“Look”, someone had said as Feyre opened her eyes, “they’re the same as yours, Nesta. The very same.”
For a long time, that’s all they had in common. The gift of the same eyes.
Perhaps Nesta had called Rhys brother because in that moment he was. He was her mirror counterpart, not a piece of her heart or soul the way Feyre, Elain and Cassian were but something prominent nonetheless. A shard of glass slicing into each other’s bones that they just couldn’t pull out.
Thank you, he’d said and she wanted to tell him not to say those words. She didn’t do anything requiring praise, she did what she did for the love of her sister and her sister’s child.
Do not thank me for my very nature.
They drifted into an uneasy peace. A gulf remained between Nesta and Elain which Nesta had no energy to remedy, but a bridge had been built between Nesta and Feyre and the connection was one Nesta strengthened as much as possible.
Nesta walked with Feyre around her gardens, joined at dinners and was polite and nodded and minded her manners and, when she had enough, she would return to the House of Wind and let Cassian love her.
As time passed, so did Nesta’s thoughts of Rhys as a brother.
Once again, he became her sister’s mate, her mate’s friend, her nephew’s father. Once again, he became High Lord. Ruler. Overseer.
Months after Nyx’s birth, Rhys and Feyre attended Winter to visit Viviane who had recently birthed her first child - a girl and rumours had followed of secret meetings between the High Lords. Rhys had purchased numerous furs; thick, luxurious pelts in sable, fawn and silver and sent them Nesta’s way.
“I don’t want these things he gives me,” she told Cassian soon after, standing in a room filled with Rhys’ tokens.
“The furs aren’t too bad,” Cassian replied. “They make the floor more comfortable,” he said, his mouth hot on her neck.
She allowed him to distract her but at night while Cassian slept, she walked around the House, grazing objects with her fingertips and glared at the ones which seemed to shimmer too bright, too long. The House itself rippled with unease.
“They’re all junk,” Nesta said to the darkened hallways. “Jewels and silks and throw cushions.”
Feyre and Rhys had told her once, not long ago, how embarrassed they were at the quantity of their money she’d spent on her path towards destruction. Her pulse jumped underneath her skin at the memory.
There had been no love for her life back then, no begging and pleading to a higher power. No, it had been their love for their finances, their concern for their reputation, their lack of control over Nesta which spiralled into entrapment.
Die, she’d heard. Just do so cheaply and in the dark.
Although the word ‘brother’ faded from her mind, Nesta let her animosity go with it. She had the sweetness of her nephew to immerse herself in and she marvelled at the smile on his gummy mouth and the way he wriggled across the floor on his belly towards her, perfect black wings tucked against his body.
One day he would use them to soar the skies and his freedom, his life, was the best gift Nesta had ever received.
His life was the best gift Nesta would ever give.
Nyx was shy of a year old when the whispers started. One day they didn’t exist and the next – they did. They held a metallic quality as though they being spoken through the clang of steel on steel.
High King.
One night, while Cassian rested on the furs, naked and sated, she trailed her fingertips up his knee, up his thigh to where his flesh lay, warm and re-hardening.
“Tell me,” she said, circling a finger around the tip, “what did Rhys speak to Kallias about all those months ago?”
Cassian exhaled a long breath. “Rhys wants Kallias to accept him as ruler.”
“Of the Night Court?”
“No, he – ah, don’t stop – of Prythian.”
“And what was their arrangement? How could Rhys obtain Kallias’ agreement?”
Cassian’s gasps filled her ears. “Through Nyx,” he forced out, “a promise he would marry Kallias’ daughter.”
After that she listened more to what the clanging whispers told her across the breeze, to what the House told her, to what she heard outside closed doors in Rhys’ home on visits to her sister.
Nesta was as serene as the Mother herself when she drifted to Rhys’ study and lingered by the locked door where he and Amren held counsel.
“They are the same as before, inert and useless.”
“Get her to the blacksmith, boy.”
“Her ability is gone.”
“Possibly, but test her to be sure. If she forges a hundred thousand swords then at least one might be Made.”
“She won’t do it.”
“Ban her from seeing the child until she does. She’ll forge then.”
Nesta closed her eyes, clenching her fists until her nails dug into her palms and blood trickled through her knuckles.
For a moment Nesta became a blade, sharp and dangerous, mounted on a wall and viewing Rhys and Amren from a height. The shadows danced from the lit hearth onto Rhys making his face sunken and hollow. For the first time, Rhys looked every inch the ancient creature he was.
Amren walked to the blade that was Ataraxia, that was Nesta, her silver eyes reflected in the shining metal, a palm splayed outwards with the reverence a worshipper showed their god.
“Turns out she wasn’t a pathetic waste of life after all.”
From then on Nesta would listen to what the blades told her.
Rhys took them from their mounts and held them, caressed them as he should his sleeping mate, his violet eyes passing from hilt to blade tip as his pupils grew fat with want.
They spoke to him but they didn’t listen and Rhys struggled with the push and pull every time he lifted a blade from the wall.
He practiced with them in the safety of his study but the blades were too heavy and made him clumsy, leaving the usually graceful High Lord stumbling over his feet. A ripple spread through the metal almost as though the sword were laughing.
We are no advantage to him, the whispers told her and Nesta knew they were infused with the anger she held towards Rhys when she Made them. Now, they said, now he believes himself your brother and he would like a new gift.
Instead that was what she asked him for, next time she was at his home.
“Hello, sister,” and his smile was akin to a wolf’s as it waited in the field for lambs.
“Rhys.”
He agreed vigorously to her request before she even named her price. Maybe Rhys thought he could eventually turn the bee itself into honey.
“I’ve given some thought,” she said, “and I’d like something back. Eris has the dagger but you have two swords remaining in your possession. Keep the small one but Ataraxia, I would like her to be mine. I will never ask anything else from you.”
The smile on his face froze into place as though he’d gone into the depths of Winter and been lost.
Though the blade wasn’t his, he didn’t want it to be hers.
“I don’t think so,” his voice soft. “What if someone tries to take advantage of you and steals the sword away?”
“I’d destroy it first.” However much the thought pained her, Ataraxia’s destruction had been considered - a gift to the other High Lords, one they would never know they’d received.
Rhys shook his head, his eyes dark. “No,” he said, “I need them.” Despite their resistance they were the only Made weapons in his hold.
“Why?”
He said nothing.
Nesta’s lip curled into a sneer. “To be High King, Rhys?”
He glowered at her.
“You know you’re starting a war among incredibly powerful High Lords?”
“I’m the most powerful.”
“There are more of them, they will combine their powers.”
“I have allies.”
“You have enemies.”
“I have friends.”
Nesta sighed and looked to the two swords, the metal glinting as though caught by firelight although the fire was unlit. Her name was murmured, the rasp of metal on metal.
“They’re your friends now but you’re demanding they give up their people, their lands and heritage to you and for what? Why would they do that willingly?”
She turned away from him and stood before the mounted blades. Her reflection was as clear as though they were mirrors, as was Rhys’ behind her, a dark mist forming over his skin.
“This is a war your son will likely reach adulthood in,” she continued, “do you want that for him?”
“I’m doing this for him,” Rhys spat, “you’re no mother, you wouldn’t understand. This is his legacy. My gift to him.”
A calm transcended over Nesta, as though she were wading through the clear waters of a pool, a loving hand on her back reminding her of their presence.
“Your gift to him should be allowing him to live his life. To allow him to care for the people of the Night Court, to give him the chance to fall in love and choose a partner of his own calling.”
“You don’t understand,” Rhys said again, “you had power for mere months and you think you’re the authority of giving it up. It’s a choice you wouldn’t have made if you understood what powerlessness meant.”
Once, when she wore another body, she could count the ribs underneath her skin by tracing them with her fingertips.
Once, in that same body, a man had pressed himself against her, his tongue forced into her mouth.
Once, Fae had ripped away her bedsheet and dragged her from her bed while Elain’s screams echoed in the dark hallway. She had drowned in the depths of the Cauldron, she’d watched her father’s blood spray across the grass, and she’d been dragged from her bed once more to be drugged and bound with her new body useless.
“If you say so.”
Nesta repeated Amren’s actions and traced her finger against the blade, Ataraxia shivered as though Nesta were running a finger down the spine of a lover. The sword moved, almost imperceptibly, but Nesta saw and wondered if Rhys did.
She’d bargained for the lives of his mate and son and yet Rhys wasn’t satisfied. Nesta was his mirror and so he gave her gifts believing she would want them as much as he did, because he continually sought out tokens to keep. He believed she would never be satisfied because he never was.
Nesta left, leaving him with the blades. They would be no benefit for him anyway and it wouldn’t be long before Ataraxia came back to her. Nesta understood now that Ataraxia had been her gift to herself.
All gone now, the Inner Circle assumed. After saving Feyre’s life, Nesta’s gift from the Cauldron is exhausted.
Lies, she thought as she walked the paths of Velaris to head home. All lies. The Cauldron had never gifted Nesta with anything. Everything she held had been stolen, ripped from something that never intended her to have it.
The sky was black, the fae lights of the taverns and restaurants glowing amber against the pitch and the happy chatter of the city revellers emerged from behind doors. All these fae living their lives as best they could, trusting in the protection of their High Lord.
They weren’t the same, her and Rhys, they were mirrored on the surface only.
Yes, they both stole power from those who never intended to gift it but she would die for those she loved while Rhys would kill for them.
The cold air was sharp and drew Nesta’s thoughts from the corners of her mind like a knife drew blood when sliced against skin. She drew her cloak around her shoulders and wrapped her arms around her middle.
There had been screaming and blood and Nesta’s pleas. There had been the dark slithering laughter of something taking something back. But there had also been the warmth of a hand, ethereal and eternal on her back and a golden magic which poured into Nesta until it overflowed.
Daughter.  
The Mother had welcomed Nesta and received her gift with open arms, re-gifting to her in return.
Death transmuted into life. Quieter but no less powerful. No less valuable in the future to come.
This is yours, Nesta was told, and will remain so until the end. This is my gift to you.
TAGGING
@live-the-fangirl-life
@champanheandluxxury
@dontgetsalmonella
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yikestripes · 5 years ago
Text
Good Morning, Sunshine
i was feeling something a little extra domestic and fluffy tonight so i whipped this up :)
word count: 1.7k
warnings: none; s o much fluff
“Hello?” You were barely audible, considering your phone ringing had not only woken you up, but the vibrating on the nightstand scared the living hell out of you.
“Hey babe, we just finished up the case. We’re boarding the jet now; I should be at your apartment in about 3 or so hours.” Spencer said, sounding exhausted himself.
“I’ll be waiting. You sound like you haven’t slept, please try to get some rest on the jet.”
“You don’t have to wait up, it’s gonna be like, 4:30 am D.C time.”
“Promise me you’ll sleep at least a little bit.”
“I’ll make sure he knocks out.” You heard Derek say on the other end.
“Thanks Derek. I love you, Spence. Have a safe flight.”
“I don’t really have control over that, but I love you too. See you tomorrow.” You shook your head with a small laugh; either Spencer really was delirious, or he didn’t know you at all. You always waited up for him when you knew he was coming home. It’s not like you’d be able to sleep anyway, you’d be awake worrying until you heard him come through the door and then make all the noise possible changing his clothes and slipping into bed. Sometimes you wondered if he even realized how loud he could be.
You put your phone back on the nightstand and climbed out of bed, pulling one of Spencer’s hoodies over your head as you made your way to the kitchen. You hummed to yourself as you looked around, wondering how you were going to entertain yourself for the next few hours while you waited. You looked to your bookshelf, but remembered that reading always made you tired. You looked at the TV and remembered that all the shows you were currently watching, you were watching with Spencer, and you both actively tried not to watch without the other. That left one option; baking.
You pulled the ingredients together quickly, already having a plan in place. You were going to make Spencer’s favorite treat; your lemon poppy seed muffins that you made every once in a while, which is what made them so special. Spencer fell in love with those before he had fallen in love with you, whenever you brought them to his office to surprise him when you two first started hanging out. He constantly joked that those were the reason you two were still together, to which you would smack his arm and he would give you that sweet little smile that only Spencer Reid could muster.
You grabbed your speaker from your bedroom and blasted some classic rock as you worked the ingredients together. By the time they were in the oven, an hour had already passed and Spencer would be there within another 2 hours. You looked to your cat, Peanut Butter, who had lazily strolled into the kitchen and just looked at you.
“What?” You asked him as he stared at you. He meowed quietly in response, and rubbed against your bare legs. You picked him up and scratched his little head, earning a soft purr in response. “I’ll go back to bed soon, PB. I’m waiting for Spence,” You said. You frowned to yourself and put him back on the ground, where he proceeded to swish his tail at you as he walked away.
“I’ve taken to talking to my cat. I’ve really lost it now. Oh great, now I’m talking to myself in my empty apartment while I bake at 2:30 in the morning. This is normal.” You said to yourself.
You shook your head once again and went to go watch a movie while the muffins finished. You decided to watch one of your old favorites, Jaws. Every time you watched it together (which was often, considering it was one of your favorite movies), Spencer would always critique the likelihood of a killer shark ever coming that close to the beach and killing that many people. You would argue back that it could have gotten a taste for humans, because sharks weren’t the brightest creatures, and he would argue that the only time in history a shark that we knew of existed at that size was the megalodon, which went extinct some time ago. Eventually you would stop responding, Spencer would wrap his arm around you to pull you closer, and you would just enjoy the movie.
The oven beeped about halfway through the movie, about 30 minutes before Spencer was supposed to come home. You grinned to yourself as you set them aside to cool, and started up the coffee maker. You pulled down Spencer’s favorite Doctor Who mug from the cabinet, set it beside your mug and the coffee machine, and went to grab his favorite pajamas from the bedroom. You knew Spencer was utterly capable of taking care of it himself, but you setting everything out for him was one of the things he loved most about you, it just showed him how much you cared time and time again.
You were in the last 10 minutes of the movie when you heard the floor creaking outside of the door, and your heart leapt into your throat. You could hear Spencer outside of the door fumbling with his keys, a sure sign that he was tired and probably had just woken up. You smiled at the fact that he had taken your advice, or Derek forced him to.
“Hey babe.” You turned the TV off and ran over to him, pulling him into a tight hug.
“Hi stranger.” You pulled away after a solid minute and ran your thumb across his cheek, taking in the circles under his eyes. “Oh baby, please tell me you slept.” Spencer smiled.
“Actually, yes. Emily actually had to wake me up this time, I slept through takeoff and landing.” He grinned.
“I laid your pajamas out on the bed for you, they’re your favorites.” Spencer placed a chaste kiss on your lips as he headed to your room. Although you hadn’t officially moved in together, Spencer basically lived at your apartment. It wasn’t out of lack of commitment or really anything else, it was somewhere between sheer laziness and not really asking the question. You both had keys to each other's apartments and could come and go as you pleased, not to mention Peanut Butter adored Spencer, but it had never really passed through your thoughts to ask him to move in.
You brewed some coffee for you both and made his just how he liked it, ridiculous amounts of sugar. It was amazing he functioned throughout the day without getting any sort of sugar crash. He emerged from your room a few minutes later, pajama clad and his hair sticking up at funny angles from the sweatshirt he put on.
“Coffee too? What did I do to deserve you,” He kissed you again, taking the mug from you.
“That’s not all,” You grinned and stepped aside, revealing the muffin tray on the counter.
“Oh my God, muffins!” He ditched his coffee mug and grabbed one, shoving half of it in his mouth. “Ohh my God, the lemon poppyseed ones!” He said through a mouthful of muffin.
“Ew, Spence, that’s disgusting!” You laughed.
“Sorry,” He grinned through his muffin-filled mouth. You shook your head as you sipped your coffee.
You looked out at the balcony as the sky began to lighten. You went over and pulled the door open, plopping yourself on one of the fluffy couches. Spencer grabbed his coffee and followed you, shutting the door just after Peanut Butter sauntered out. You patted your lap and he jumped up, purring. Spencer pet him gently, sitting snugly beside you. You leaned against him and took a deep breath, closing your eyes. You opened them to see Spencer staring down at you, a goofy smile forming on his face.
“What, Muffin Boy?” You laughed, wiping away a crumb from his cheek.
“Just looking at you, you look so beautiful in this light.” You blushed. Despite being together for just around 2 years, he still knew how to give you butterflies.
“I love you.” He kissed your head and looked out at the rising sun.
“I love you too.” You sat in silence for a little while, just watching as the sun lazily grew over the D.C horizon.
“Want to move in?” You broke the silence. Spence looked down at you with his eyebrows raised.
“Haven’t I basically done that already?” He asked.
“I mean yeah, but you’re still paying rent for your old place.”
“I would say I forgot, but I have an eidetic memory.” You giggled and Spencer grinned, happy to have made you laugh.
“So, what do you say?”
“Statistically couples who move in together have a higher chance of a successful marriage, whereas couples who get married and then move in together have a much higher divorce rate dependent on the age of the couple. So yes, I will move in.” Much to Peanut Butter’s chagrin, you sat up and turned around, locking Spencer in a passionate kiss. Before things could get too heated, Peanut Butter got jealous and swatted at your cheek. You and Spencer broke apart and looked at the small black cat, who just tilted his head.
“You are such a little asshole sometimes.” You said, staring him down. He stared back before turning around, sassily swishing his tail in your face before pausing at the door, and looking at you. Your jaw dropped at the attitude and Spencer let him inside, turning his attention back to you.
“I forgot, he’s so possessive over me.” Spencer grinned, taking a sip of his coffee.
“Shut up.” You grabbed your mug and headed inside, shutting the door behind you and leaving Spencer laughing on the porch.
You left your empty mug in the sink and climbed into bed, Peanut Butter and Spencer joining you moments later. Spencer put the cat down on the bed and climbed into bed beside you, pulling you closer as Peanut Butter settled in the middle. Spencer placed a chaste kiss on your forehead and fell asleep with a smile on his face. Nothing more than a calm, domestic life with you was anything he ever wanted.
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tokoyamisstuff · 3 years ago
Text
Dark Side Of The Moon Ch. 2 - Dark! Loki x Reader
Chapter 2: “On The Run”
Chapter Summary: Even though you can’t help feeling drawn to the lunatic that looks like your deceased lover, you try to surpress your feelings and flee to find your friends.
Warnings: Loki is fucking crazy, Violence, Torture, Jotun! Loki, Mentions of Death, Abuse, Unhealthy Relationship, Mentions of Rape
Words: 3360
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[Story Masterlist]
Masterlist to my other works right ->Here<-
“And the shark, it has tears,
And they run down its face.
But the shark lives in the water -
So the teardrops one can’t see.”
- Rammstein - Haifisch
Taglist: @winterglcw​ @commonintrest​ @emmojoy​ @satansbra @just-someone-who-likes-to-write​​
“She died through my hands.”
That sentence replayed over and over in your head, forming a continuous loop as you silently formed those words with your own lips.
“It’s not him!” you called out to yourself, since your reason had seemingly disappeared ever  since you first saw the person that was a perfect copy of the man you once loved.
You were rolling around on the bare floor, shivering as you softly punched your head to not get lost in thought again. The emperor didn’t even have the basic decency to give you any clothes back, only having the Citauri throw you into an old dungeon to keep you prisoner - or whatever he’d plan to do with you.
That man was so different of your Loki.
And the timeline both of you were currently in had exceeded your worst expectations, making you wonder if fate just wanted to torment you.
In this universe, Thanos never even got so far as to collect all of the Infinity Stones. Loki Laufeyson had won the battle of New York and took over this world, then somehow double-crossed and killed the Titan. So right now, he possessed the power of the Tesseract, as well as the Cascet of Ancient Winters. For what reason he kept that Jotun relic was unknown, probably out of nostalgic sentiment you assumed.
Afterwards, the God of Mischief had killed his brother Thor in bad blood, as well as torturing Natasha - the exact way he threatened her back in your world, when he was in his cell. Clint was still his servant, as it seemed. You had seen him when they took you to his cell.
He couldn’t get rid of all the Avengers, however - even though their current location was unknown. They were in hiding for many years now, probably trying to get their hands on the other Infinity Stones. 
Also noticeable was the fact that this universe had neither Hela, nor Captain Marvel - so one good and one bad thing to compensate for each other. Not that they’d be a match for Loki in his current form anyway...
And there was no Dr. Strange on this version of Earth, your last bit hope to escape disappearing as you learned about this fact.
That much was all you had learned by now, mainly through tricking and manipulating some of your guards into giving you information.
All in all, you only knew for sure was that this world’s Loki was a terribly trong, murderous sociopath, intoxicated by power and loneliness.
And you had become the focus of the little emotion left in him.
It was hard trying to surpress all the voices and memory submerging in your mind. So there was nothing left for you except for rolling up into a ball, lying on the cold floor as you prepared to be washed over with sadness and guilt once again.
_____
“Would you help me recieve the greatest honor by becoming mine and mine only, Lady Y/N?”
How could you ever forget this moment?
Back on the Asgardian refugee ship, your Loki had asked you that very question, now popping up in your mind once again.
Every detail was still as bright as daylight, preserved deep into your heart.
You clearly remembered the small, green box he had summoned out of thin air, presenting you a plain but still incredibly beautiful ring. The golden piece of jewlery formed a snake eating itself - a symbol of infinity and wholeness.
It was just his way of being thoughtful.
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“I-I prepared this a while go, to be precize...but I never thought of being worthy” he had stammered and you found yourself speechless, admiring that very scene playing in front of your eyes. “A-Anyway, after all that happened, I realized that all moments I spent happy, were when I was with you. I don’t want to lose you again, Y/N! And I feared, well...that it might be too late to ask someday.”
It was most unjust that this most blissful moment would be interrupted by a great rumbling shaking through the whole spaceship - and even before Thor would crash Loki’s proposal, both of you were aware just what kind of danger you would have to face soon:
Thanos.
Your numbers had already been decimated by Ragnarok, all that’s left being some civilian refugees, injured and traumatized. The only ones capable of fighting left were Loki, Thor, Heimdall, you and the Hulk.
Yet all of your struggles were to no avail, only able to watch and scream and bag at the Titan, so he’d at least spare those innocent lives as he mercilessly slaughtered woman and children alike.
“Fucking monster!” Pulling out a gun, your mind went completely blank as you gave it some last, desperate attempt to save or avenge just anyone.
No bullet would even come close enough to pierce his skin, as Ebony Maw would deflect them to hit yourself and people close to you. “I’m not the only one you should see responsible for this outcome” Thanos scoffed.
“What do you mea-” Your voice got swallowed by a pained groan as you saw Loki, kneeling in front of Thanos and revealing the one thing he was after:
The Tesseract.
“You......took it?!?” The only thing managing to escape your throat was a high-pitched yell as Loki’s face contorted in disappointment and regret - just now realizing that he had put you all in danger.
They would’ve never went after you if it wasn’t for him. He had doomed his race, failed you and what was left of his family.
“How could you put us all in danger?! I thought you had changed! You swore it with your life, Loki! That you loved me more than you desired power!”
No answer.
Instead, the god would prepare one of his speeches, directing words of undying fidelity at Thanos and his arms. And even though it was meant to be lies, a play to make the threat feel save, every single word hit your heart like knives.
“How could I ever marry someone like you?!” feeling as if Loki most recent, selfish act was suffocating you, you could only whisper - yet he understood very clearly, the facade dropping in an instant.  “I-I hate you...traitor...”
If only you knew that those would be the last words you’d ever direct at him...
Loki materializes a dagger, desperately trying to make up for his biggest mistake yet, and at least save you, the light of his cursed existence, and the only thing he had ever done in his life full of wrongs.
But Thanos looked right through the charade from the very beginning, using the stones to trap Loki in their hold - and then, grabbing the god’s throat.
“You have what you want, Thanos!” Thor tried to bargain, “There’s even less than half of my race left. Please, just let us go!”
“Oh, I will” he spoke stony, then shifting his attention to the god in his hands. “But first, I’ll do you a favor and erase that disgraceful pest all of you were too weak to take care of.”
As he was struggling for air, gasping uncontrollably as he tried to free his neck from the Giant, Loki’s glare wandered to you - and when your eyes met, both of your hearts skipped a beat.
He smiled. In the face of death, the last thing he wanted you to remember was the good things after all.
And seeing the ring on your finger, how couldn’t he? Loki knew you were about to say yes - and knowing this was more than enough for someone like him.
After all, the God of Mischief was used to happiness being taken away from him as soon as he thought it to be okay to open up to someone.
But you were safe. That’s all that counted for him!
It was like his eyes were telling you “It’s gonna be alright. I’m sorry, Y/N...I love you.”
You don’t remember much after that, having a mental breakdown as you had to watch the love of your life perish - and forever thinking about how you had turned him down just seconds before.
A part of you had died with him back then.
_____
The creaking sound of the cell’s door made you jump from your dream - but the person which entered was one you had never seen before.
A monster.
It’s silhouette very much resembled Loki, yet his skin was painted in a dark shade of blue, with thin linings carved across his whole body. He had fangs and even horns coming out of his temple to add at that.
The beast’s eyes were shining in a threatening red, glistering contrastful in the dark hallway. But the worst were those black irises, absent of any form of compassion - there seemed to be only rage, confusion and hate.
“Fuck!” you screamed, terrified and fearing for your life. Shuffling until your back hit the wall of a corner of the room, you defendingly put your arms in front of yourself. “Go away! Don’t to-ouch me!”
Loki cleared his voice as he put the Casket away, not making any efforts to revert his outer appearance back to ‘normal’. He had admired it on his way to your cell, like he’d do many times a day when he was reminiscing about the day he learned about his heritage...
...and how he had killed Odin, his adoptive father, with that very relic, afterwards clearing the universe of that despiseful race of the Jotunn - making him the last of his kind.
“Oh my” a dark voice finally declared, “Seems like ‘your’ Loki never dared to show you his true form. Pathetic.”
No, that wasn’t completely true. Your lover had at least told you back then. But when did you ever have the time to talk things over and heal, being dragged from one fight to another?!
The Jotunn felt great joy as he towered over you, gleefully watching your naked body cowering to his knees, covered in goosebumps and shaking heavily. Your breath was clearly visible while you tried to cover your shame as best as you could, wary glare never leaving the abomination that was just lurking right in front of you.
“Wha- OUCH!” you hissed as the Frost Giant took ahold of your wrist, monitoring the pain spreading across your face as his touch would frostburn any skin he was touching with ease.
Loki grinned menacingly as he let go off of you, admiring his handywork as the first layer of your skin had already died, crumbling away to reveal your pink flesh.
“Oh, how I missed that” he explained, much to your surprise ripping a piece of his own clothing apart to cover the wound with it. “Your kind is so easily broken. It’s always fascinating to watch.”
“Just kill me already, you freak!”
Well, Loki had in fact spent hours after hours thinking about how to handle you, and yet he couldn’t decide. Obviously he would’ve killed you right away if it was otherwise, but he still had a soft spot for you somewhere deep in his heart, after all.
And it upset him more than he’d ever admit. So he tried to assert his dominance, to ease the feeling of weakness and loss of control.
“I’m only doing you a favor, woman.” The god would touch your cheek, making you flinch away - but this time, it wouldn’t hurt. Never would he dare to scar this most beautiful face!
“The man you loved was just the same as me, yet it seemed he wasn’t completely honest with you. What you are seeing right now is the form of a Frost Giant...the monstrosity you chose to love.”
“L-Loki…”
It was no surprise that he saw tears filling the rim of your eyes - yet out of a whim, you pulled your arms around his neck, tears wetting his robe. He gasped, unable to act in any way as he stiffened in the pose.
That was by far not the reaction he had been expecting - and he surprised you as well. You had thought him to instantly shove you away, beat you agaib or even bite - but he just kneeled there, not daring to make a move.
"Why?” Now his voice was much softer, pained even. “I’m a monster. I hurt you. So why?”
“I’m so sorry” you whimpered, words being interrupted by heavy sobbing. “I try to fight it, I really do. But I just can’t, I-I”
“Aren’t you afraid?”
“How could I be? It’s you, Loki...no matter what you look like.” Eventually, you’d face him again, wiping the tears out of your face when for another moment, you made yourself forget that this was a completely different person. “I was just surprised, that’s all. Letting me see this form out of nowhere...”
“Y/N, I’m not the same as him” he retorted, knowing very well what it’s like to lose oneself in daydreams and illusions to ease the pain of loss. His sight wandered around the room instead of your face, stating “I did horrendous things, dear. Tormented and killed countless. It’s unforgiveable.”
“So did he” you stated, even though you knew those two Loki’s couldn’t be compared. “And you should already know: I feel dead inside, ever since he died.”
“You really loved him, didn’t you?” When you nodded confidently, Loki sighed ashamed, reluctantly touching your wrist again. A warm magic would flow through you, healing the wound in no time. “I wish she had felt the same for me...”
For a while, both of you were plainly sitting in uncomfortable silence, with Loki even lending you his cloak to warm yourself up.
“It’s not him” you told yourself once again. “It’s not him. It’s not him. IT’S NOT HIM!!! That man is dangerous and instable. He can’t be trusted!”
And then, finally, you dared asking, cutting through the thick air:
“What exactly happened to me, in this world?”
Loki’s face contorted in agony, rubbing his face as if in deep pain. “Is this really necessary? I already told you. She died because of me.”
“More details would be nice” you retorted bluntly, not really caring if he was to have a violent outburst again. Curiosity got the better of you at that moment.
The emperor’s voice was low and husky, and just now you realized how damn tired he looked - with dark rings under his eyes, and more pale than you had ever remembered him.
The weight of his sins sure had taken a stroll on that sensitive man.
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"I saw the ring” he uttered deeply affected, “That’s something I could only dream of. Thinking about it, I think she never really loved me in the first place. Or maybe she just grew tired of my lies. Understandable, I have to admit...”
“Yes, it was quite the opposite, even” he continued after a long, strained breath of his. “She hated me. Joined the Avengers and tried to kill me, several times. Only years later I learned about the truth: Already far in the past, back on Asgard, she betrayed me. After I fell off the Bifrost, she thought myself dead - and consoled herself by bedding my brother. I had to kill him, I-I-I just had to!”
Loki’s hands were shaking so frantically you could feel it from over there, mad eyes darting over your physique to take in your reaction. “After they finally lost, I took her prisoner. Seven months of trying to make her mine, no matter the methods. Mind-controlling her would not be satisfying. So I tortured her, played games with her sanity, and- I’d rather not speak about how else I violated her.”
“You, wha-” Now you were the one shivering in horrid anticipation, “You raped me...?”
No answer. Instead he just finished this disastrous story.
“One day, I went to her cell like I always did. I hoped once her mind was broken she’d stop struggling to be mine. But she never did. You Y/N’s are quite the fighters, as it seems.”
“Wha- wwhat happened to me...I mean, ‘her’?”
A loud whine escaped his vocal cords as he hit the wall right next to your face, making you suck in a pained breath.
“She used her chains to hang herself. There was nothing I could do. Ever since then I knew I’m cursed to inflict pain on anything I hold dear.”
"D-Don’t give me that self-pitying bullshit” you wanted to shout at his face - but the cramping in your heart as well as the hyperventillation made talking impossible.
How could one do something like that to a person they claimed to love?!
“Go” you whimpered, already shuffling away from him and he could hear anguish and fear drop out of every vocal, and he realized you were having a panic attack. “Please!”
Loki closed his eyes, letting out one last, deep sigh. He knew he owed you that much.
“Very well.”
That whole night, you spent crying and screaming to your hearts avail, unable to process your current situation and newfound knowledge.
So that would be your life from now on? Being hurt mentally and physically, frostburnt and hurt and violated against your will - all while looking at a face that remembered you of happier days?
Never!
Things were just like that evil Loki said: You are a fighter!
And if you couldn’t help that crazy man, you would at least help yourself! The Avengers are still out there, somewhere. You needed to escape and help them!
How could you have been so blind all those years?
Loki - your Loki - would have never wanted to you give up. He’d want you to survive and live your life to it’s fullest, trying to make the best out of everything you’ve got.
Just like he always did. That much you had learned from him.
“I’m sorry, Loki. If I die, I can’t even remember you...I love you…”
Breaking out succeeded faster than you could ever think it would take - because when you’d finally get out of your fetal courl and wandered across the cell, you realized Loki didn’t properly close the heavy steel door back when he rushed away from you.
“It’s not him. There’s no helping that man. I have to find my friends, I-”
Still shocked and scared and traumatized, you didn’t even realize that someone was watching you, not even questioning that the hallways were oddly empty.
You sneaked out of an open window, bare feet feeling the morning dew as you shook away Lokis cloak and ran as fast as your feet could carry you.
There was it - the fence.
No one could tell you what kind of world would await you outside of that property as you swiftly avoided some guards, rushing through the all so beautiful garden.
But as soon as you reached out to climb the railing, you felt someone balling a fist in your hair, harshly holding you back and causing you to stumble and fall.
“I thought you to be different…” an all too familiar voice grumbled. Loki didn’t even want to hear any apology or excuse, kicking your guts so heavily that you had to throw up, cramping on the ground.
“Don’t you dare to run away ever again!” he now yelled furiously, "She tried it too...so damn.many.times…!”
But before you could even respond, he suddenly began to cry uncontrollably. “I thought you would stay. Do you think I like to do this?!”
His voice was laced with grief and regret, yet he kept on forming countless bruises on your body. “Why can’t you fucking love me, hel?!”
You didn’t know how long his violent crying fit lasted, with him weeping as he let off some steam on your helpless self.
There was no trace of the hurt, regretful man left you talked to in your cell earlier. After being finished, having reclaimed a fraction of composure, Loki pressed your face in between his hands, ripping on your mangled body to face him.
“Fate gifted me another chance to possess you, Y/N. And I will form you into a magnificent pet, I promise.”
_______
If you want to get on the taglist (or deleted from lmao) feel free to ask! ♡
Feedback is always appreciated!
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hallowed-be-thy-username · 4 years ago
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Ooo...can i please request Fem reader who have just been heartbroken by a one sided crush and then one day she met The Joker and he makes her forgot about her crush? Can be nsfw if u want 👀
Hello, anon! Ok so this is longer than I'd originally planned but I was having fun 😆 it’s a little story in the realm of a crackfic that I had a lot of fun with! I hope you like it!!
Self-insert, Ledger Joker x fem reader, crackfic
Word count: 2,121
Warnings: light nsfw, mentions of mild violence
Summary: Sometimes people surprise you with what they'll do when their back is up against a wall, even the Joker.
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Who?
It had to happen today, of all days. You went to grab a coffee this afternoon and what did you see? The man she knew you were obsessed with had his lips on hers. Right across the street from the café, your so-called friend was making out with the guy you’ve had a crush on for years.
He was back in Gotham on a business trip. His stay would have been shorter if it wasn’t for state of things in the city for the past couple of weeks. It seemed your friend decided it was an opportunity to swoop in before you’d gained the confidence to do it yourself. But the kicker is that he’d already agreed to meet you for dinner tomorrow night on top of it. Looks like he gets around. You all had gone to the same high school years ago and things apparently haven’t changed much. Aren’t you too old for games like this? You tried not to dwell on it, you had a job to do, but it’d been burning in your stomach like caustic acid for hours now.
You resisted the temptation to text her, tell her you saw them. No, if they want to play games, you could play your own. So far you hadn’t come up with anything but the old stand-by, the silent treatment. But this needed something bigger.
Your revenge plotting would have to wait, though. A minor injury out on patrol last month landed you a position in booking at MCU just in time for shit to hit the fan. Being a Gotham police officer was nothing like you’d expected it to be. You had your sights set on helping the disadvantaged, the people who couldn’t catch a break in this god forsaken city, who fell victim to loan sharks and got stuck in an endless cycle of debt to the inexplicably powerful Mob presence here. But the amount of red tape and corruption making that hopelessly impossible was enough to make you resent your decision in the first place. By now, you were one drug possession arrest away from never coming back.
Today, however, had taken an interesting turn. Your eyes were glued to the tv screen in the front office where live coverage of the SWAT team’s descent on the Pruitt building captured everyone’s attention. Some were optimistic about it, but most of the talk around MCU was skeptical. “If he’s gotten out of it before, he can do it again.”
But they got him. Back up teams raced out of the precinct and everyone scrambled with nervous excitement to carry out preparations for his arrival.
You weren’t here the last time the Joker had been brought in. You were off duty and you’d found yourself feeling a little jealous that you weren’t. He was all Gotham talked about, particularly around here. You weren’t sure how many times you’d seen his face by now. That face. There was something about the way he looked into the camera, it sent a tingle down your spine. It was a strange mixture of fear and fascination. It left you feeling conflicted, uneasy from the butterflies it stirred in your stomach, like you shouldn’t get this kind of excitement from it, a little spark of thrill you’d managed to keep suppressed.
But that spark was growing dangerously hotter now that you knew he’d be coming here, so soon, nonetheless. You had to keep your composure. The excitement was enough that you’d almost forgotten the betrayal you witnessed this afternoon… almost.
Your heart pounded as you approached the booking office, the sound of shouts and cheering echoing through the halls. What was he going to be like? Would he be angry? Was he going to take an officer hostage like last time? What if it ended up being you? You tried to take a deep breath, fighting the shaking of your hand as you reached for the door handle before carefully opening it.
You froze just past the doorway, letting it shut behind you. He was so… tall. He stood behind the intake desk, at least several inches taller than the SWAT officer removing the cuffs from his wrists behind his back. His expression was blank, casually watching the officers try to do their job while looking like their nerves were about to snap, avoiding touching him as much as they could.
“One move and I won’t hesitate to shoot you,” one officer said, doing his best to keep his voice from cracking.
The Joker didn’t say a word. He just flicked his tongue over his lip and lazily rolled his eyes. Butterflies fluttered into your throat and you fought to swallow them down. You had to try to relax, you can’t let him get to you. Of course, that’s easier said than done, his presence alone was enough to ignite an oddly alluring anxiety within you.
The awkward silence was broken when the on duty detective voiced his intolerance for that kind of behavior before noticing your arrival.
“Nice of you to join us, officer.”
All eyes landed on you, including his. You couldn’t breathe for a moment. That feeling that you got when you saw his picture was nothing compared to the intense wave of adrenaline that struck you like lightning, leaving you in a cold sweat as his eyes connected with yours.
You tried to maintain a professional demeanor, but you couldn’t hide the way color drained from your face as you slowly approached him. Just breathing took an immense amount of concentration. So much that you didn’t hear the detective giving you the case number to record before beginning the booking process.
“Officer! I’m speaking to you!”
You jumped and broke your gaze away from Joker’s dark rimmed eyes to quickly grab the form as the detective mumbled under his breath. Your hand was shaking again as you tried to breathe normally and recorded the number then in the next line, “Name, Unknown. Alias, The Joker.”
A shiver trickled its way down your back as you could feel eyes on you again and you looked up from the form to see him carefully watching you. Your breath hitched and you quickly tore your eyes away to stare at the form as heat bloomed in your cheeks. This couldn’t be happening. You’d been avoiding talking with anyone about him for weeks and no matter how much you denied it, now you knew why.
The other officers took his long purple coat and suit jacket off of his shoulders, removing a variety of knives from his clothing before turning him around to face you. You kept your eyes down, taking the cuffs from your belt to hold them in your hands, ready to place them on his wrists. A knot has tied itself around your insides and grew tighter the longer you stood there and stared at his hands, stained with traces of white, black, and red paint. Your face burned hotter, and your heart pounded relentlessly in your throat, but you had to try to remain calm. If you kept showing them how nervous you were, you’d be booted off of the case and another officer would take your place. This was pure torture, but you still didn’t want that to happen.
You were surprised by a need for more. He already had you trapped in this confusing push and pull to give in to the unusual attraction you had to him even though you knew it was wrong. It had taken you this long to realize that was it. A deep seated attraction had been sitting in the back of your mind and now it was rapidly taking over your body.
Goosebumps prickled your skin when your fingertips grazed his bare wrists, clicking the latch on the cuffs in place. This was like nothing you’d ever felt before, the rush in your veins, the heat in your stomach. You managed to keep the exhilaration spreading through your body from boiling over as you lead him to the line up wall for his intake photo.
He stood in front of the digital camera, holding the placard displaying his alias with the date and case number, his green hair swept hastily out of his face and infamous greasepaint smeared wildly. When you looked at the screen to capture the image, the knot in your belly unraveled. His gaze focused directly up into the camera lens and straight at yours, the corner of his scarred mouth tugging into a smirk. Your heart pounded in your ears and you could feel yourself shudder as rational thought slipped away, drowned out by a pervasive impulse. You knew he was dangerous, of course, and you couldn’t explain it but, you didn’t care. The fire he’d ignited within you was in control now.
A nervous buzz spread from your hands and down your arms before you looked up from the screen to meet his gaze, returning a subtle smile. Joker lifted his eyebrow and his grin stretched across his face until the other officers approached and he let it fall with a swipe of his tongue across his lip. That was all it took. You let those tempestuous flames engulf you and now you weren’t going to do anything to stop them.
Everything felt slowed down, like you were dreaming, feverish with this sudden and powerful desire when you kicked the door to the private search room open, pulling him inside with you and locking the door. You had precious few minutes before they’d find you. You quickly unlocked his handcuffs and spun around to put your back against the door, gripping the lapels of his vest when you stopped and stared up at his face as your stomach dropped. Why did you just do that?
But the feeling of regret didn’t last long. A low chuckle rumbled in Joker’s chest before he leaned on his hands, placed against the door on either side of you and brought his face inches from yours. Your breath huffed over his lips and the familiar feeling of arousal swelled between your legs as you felt his heat wash over you.
“Needed somewhere, uh, private to perform your search, officer?”
His lips hovered over yours as you smiled and answered softly, “I figured we’d start with the oral cavity search.”
His giggles were muffled when you crashed your lips into his, surrendering to the spontaneous and intense lust you found yourself swimming in. Your heart soared when he kissed you back, raising the intensity and allowing your tongue into his mouth as his hands moved to grip the sides of your face and your eyes fluttered closed.
He hummed when you wrapped your hands around his neck to lace your fingers in his hair and pressed your body against his. You could feel his size beneath the fabric of his pants and your breath hitched. This was one of those moments that didn’t feel like it was really happening, but it was. His hands slid down your sides to grip your waist and your mouths separated to catch your breath.
His eyes traveled up and down your body before another devious smile sent a shiver down your back.
“You. How about you come with me, hm?” he said, his eyes flickering to the gun in your belt.
Your stomach fluttered and you stared back at him, flinching when fists started pounding on the other side of the door and voices shouted. You shouldn’t trust him, you knew you shouldn’t. But trust hasn’t gotten you much in the past, has it? Besides, you didn’t have to trust him. Whatever happens is going to happen at this point so you might as well enjoy the ride. You’d already let it go this far. You swallowed your nerves and nodded, holding on tight to his shoulders.
Another chuckle made you bite your lip before he leaned in and purred in your ear, “Follow my lead, doll.”
You straddled his lap in the back of an unmarked van speeding down the street only moments later, his tongue in your mouth as your hands slid down his torso to the button on his pants. Was he always this lucky? Or did he know this would happen all along? Of course, this was a crazy thought but nothing that had happened today was sane. He held your own gun to your head and made his escape like it was planned that way. Either way, you’d easily forgotten all about the betrayal that felt so insignificant now.
In fact, tomorrow you’d receive a text from the traitor herself bragging to you about hooking up with your now former crush and your response, short and sweet, was “who?”
Taglist! @youmaycallmebrian @heavymetalnarwhal @neverputsaltinyoureyes @jokersqueenofchaos @into-crazy @killingjokee @astheworlddturns @jslittlebirdie @drreidsconverse @vipervixxen
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caspianjames · 3 years ago
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ok bestie willex with 👑🐚
IM SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG but here you go!!!!
****
Alex had never liked the ocean. Even when he was living, it always scared him. His family had taken lots of camping trips when he was young, and lakes he loved. He could swim all day in them, lost in the fresh water and sand. His parents used to joke that he was part fish. Luke always said he was part mermaid (his parents would never say that, though. Much too feminine for their son. Luke had no such qualms, and loved to explain to Alex’s dad, with a startling amount of patience for a ten year old, that mermaids were actually badass gods of war - it wasn’t their fault they were pink), and Reggie would tell Alex he was part salmon, because Reggie was weird like that.
But when it came to the ocean, Alex wasn’t part anything. He liked his feet firmly on the sand as far away from the edge of the water as possible.
He was pretty sure it was because he had always liked consistency. Things needed to be stable, to stay the same. But the ocean wasn’t stable, not at all. It was hidden undertows, roaring waves, huge tides. It was natural disasters and sharks and drowning. So Alex stayed on the sand.
Which was all fine, except that Willie loved the ocean. It was possibly the only thing they loved as much as skating. Which was how Alex found himself standing at the edge of the water one day, hand in Willie’s, shaking like a leaf.
“You can’t even feel the water, hotdog,” Willie said, his tone light. It didn’t help Alex feel any better, though.
“If something goes wrong it’ll kill me,” Alex said instead. “It happens all the time.”
“Riiiiight,” Willie said, drawing out the i in that lazy way he did that Alex would never admit he loved so much. “Except you’re already dead.”
Alex sputtered. “It’ll kill me again, then!”
“C’mon,” Willie wheedled, “if you really don’t want to we can go do something else - you can show me how to play your drums! But I really think you’ll like this.”
The problem, Alex thought, was that he really DID want to try this.
The first time he’d gotten caught in the rain when he was a ghost, he’d noticed it didn’t touch him. The world got wet, but Alex stayed dry. Willie taught him how to feel the rain when he wanted to. Willie reminded him how it felt to jump in puddles like he was five years old again, to lie on the wet grass and stare up as the rain fell from the sky.
“I want to,” Alex said, finally. He gripped Willie’s hand tighter. “It can’t hurt me, you’re right.”
Slowly, with Willie by his side, he took a step in.
It was a peculiar feeling - different from passing through walls or doors or even people. He could feel the water - the texture hitting his feet in time with the waves lapping. But also, he couldn’t feel the water - it didn’t get him wet, nothing really actually touched him. Like the water was there, but not.
Like Alex was there, but not.
Willie pulled him deeper, rambling about their day skating through LA. It was an effort to keep him calm, Alex knew. The sound of Willie’s voice was his tether, sometimes, to reality. Just like Luke or Reggie, or even Julie and Flynn now, but it was different with Willie.
It didn’t stop Alex from nearly having a panic attack when they hit chin depth in the water.
“You don’t need to breathe,” Willie said in a gently mocking tone. “Even if you do breathe, you’re not actually breathing anything.”
Arms wound tightly around Willie, they stepped underneath the water. Alex held his breath out of habit, and after a couple minutes he realized his lungs weren’t burning and he wasn’t panicking or drowning.
He didn’t need to breathe. Right.
It was a surreal experience. They didn’t need to swim - they walked along the floor of the ocean, along the rocks and weeds that Alex couldn’t really feel. Alex felt himself relax, the waves lapping against his body in time with his heartbeat; Willie’s hand steady in his.
“Told you,” Willie said. It would sound gloating if it were anyone else, but Willie never gloated.
“This is amazing,” Alex breathed back. He chose not to think about how Willie could hear his voice even though they were underwater. If there was anything he had learned recently, it was that the ghost world did not have nearly the same laws of physics.
Willie tugged him farther, and they walked in silence for a while. Really, Alex understood why people explored the oceans. There were fish - so many fish. Every time they went a little bit deeper, different kinds of fish appeared. He startled when they went by a shark, but Willie just laughed, reaching out to stroke it. The shark nuzzled them.
“Can it see us?” Alex asked incredulously.
“I’ve never figured it out,” Willie responded. “But sharks love ghosts for some reason.”
“Bring all your ghost friends down to the bottom of the ocean, do you?” Alex asked. He meant to tease, but the words came out more jealous than he meant them to.
Willie just smiled back softly. “Nah,” they said. “Just you.”
Alex told his heart to stop fluttering. It didn’t work.
Willie shook his hand off suddenly and bent down, standing back up with a huge shell.
“I feel like you shouldn’t be able to pick things up on the bottom of the ocean while also staying dry,” Alex said. If anxiety could still make his palms sweat, they’d be sweating.
Willie just shrugged and gave Alex half a smile. “Ghost physics,” they said. They reached up and placed the shell delicately on Alex’s head.
“I crown you King of the Ocean, Alex Mercer,” Willie said solemnly.
It was cute - for the whole second it lasted until some sort of crab popped it’s legs out and scuttled off Alex’s head, shell and all. Alex screamed like a baby - the only thing scarier than spiders were GIANT spiders, and it didn’t matter if they were technically called crabs. They were still giant, terrifying spiders.
His screeches turned to laughter, though, when he realized Willie was doubled up in the fetal position on the ocean floor, laughing hysterically and trying to apologize between breaths.
Alex was pretty sure lifers could hear them laugh as far as the shore, ghost physics be damned.
Maybe they’d think it was mermaids.
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rein-ette · 3 years ago
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Are you still working on your Commonwealth study? Do you have any thoughts on Arthur's relationships with his colonies apart from Canzuk + US?
Not properly, unfortunately with exams and then work I haven’t had mental/emotional capacity to do real research (and probably won’t for a while 😔). But I have continued to think about and develop certain relationships, and I think I also have old hcs I’ve never shared, so I’ll put those down!
Born into the Empire
Australia
@oumaheroes has already done such great hcs on him idk what I can add, but basically he was a little bit of a rowdy child, always breaking windows and shattering fancy pots, never able to sit still. I think rainbow once mentioned that Ken (short for Kenneth, my name for Aus) was a lot like England as a child in his curiosity and energy, and I wholeheartedly agree. But I think Arthur’s intensity was more inwardly directed, pushing him to pursue and master new talents and learn whatever he could, while Australia is a little more carefree in his love for the outdoors, exploring, jumping around and off things, little wild animals. Unfortunately for him, he was born in a period of the empire when Arthur was very serious about his kids education, and therefore often praised those who studied hard and learned fast, which really just wasn’t Australia’s cup of tea. Australia took this kinda hard and thought he was the “dumb” one in the family that Arthur was always scolding, but in reality Arthur knew and appreciated that Australias interests lay elsewhere — he was just a frustrated, tired, parent who really wanted to give his kids the best while also holding his empire together, two goals that were never going to fit well in the end and would completely exhaust him.
As Australia’s grown older he’s realized a bit of this (not entirely, though) and also that 1) he really did break a lot expensive things and cause general mayhem 2) scolding us Arthur’s way of showing he cares, if he didn’t he wouldn’t have payed attention to him at all 3) despite being a penal colony, he was still one of Arthur’s more “legitimate” children (being white and a boy) and was therefore still incredibly privileged — never having to question, for example, why it was that Arthur was his dad, if it should be this way, or if he had a seat at the family table at all (more on this later).
New Zealand
Zee, from birth, was a clear favourite. Obedient, calm, quietly intelligent, he would also later develop a blistering sense of humour which combined with his appearance made it overwhelmingly clear who’s child he was. If Ken questioned his place in the family because of his poor academic record and others did because of their appearance/race/other complications, Kaelan never had such problems; his siblings called him the “prince.” Zee, however, also had a charm that, like Matthew, endeared him to his siblings and mostly protected him from jealousy, though he certainly still had issues with being called a try hard, daddy’s boy, bossy, arrogant. Certainly as a child Zee was a little prideful and, under that unperturbed demeanour, willful, but he grew out of it by the 20th century and became one of those most trusted by Arthur, second only to Matthew. He’s also always been inseparable from his brother Australia despite their differences, and today they both have one of the healthiest and most amicable relationships with Arthur of any nation, let alone former colonies (family road trips, every summer).
Bermuda
I absolute fell in love with this girl after reading about here, once, in this fic by @shachaai, and after that my mind just ran away with me. For me, her human name given to her by Arthur just has to be Ariel — for the little mermaid reference, yes, symbolizing her connection to the sea and stunning good looks, but also because:
1. Ariel is a biblical name, meaning lion of God. This makes sense to me, because Bermuda began as a Portuguese trade post, so Arthur definitely consulted our resident bad catholic Port before naming her.
2. Ariel used to be boys name. This also makes sense, because I hc Bermuda was and still is a tomboy. Bitch is fierce, takes no prisoners, and has zero filter. Her letters to Arthur, which all the colonies sent so Arthur could keep an eye on things, were full of shit like “I swear to god if the Spanish don’t get out of my waters I might eat one of them,” and “father, I asked you for destroyers two months ago, and yet you sent them to Hong Kong — could you explain this most unusual occurrence, surely it’s not that you forgot”, and “thank you for the harpoon on my birthday, I caught a small shark a couple days ago and have sent you some of its teeth for your collection.” Arthur tolerates this attitude because he’s weak when it comes to girls; he absolutely spoils his daughters (and flushes like a 16 year old when a woman so much as bats her eyelashes at him). Yes, p*ssywhipped Arthur is a hill I will die on.
3. It also suits her because? Ariel? Shakespeare? The Tempest? Bermuda Triangle? Shipwrecks? Daughter-like figure of powerful and vengeful sorcerer? Yeah. And this girl is a fire spirit — she is so lively, snarky, clever. As she’s grown older she’s mellowed out a little, but still: a no shit taken, no fucks given type of gal.
4. Speaking of growing up, she’s also become quite the beauty. Shacha, if I’m remembering correctly, described her as dark skinned, wavy-haired, and green eyed and that image has been burned onto the back of my eyelids ever since. Those Iberian genetics really be pulling through for her, that’s for sure. Engport love child if I’ve ever seen one. Definitely one of the prettiest in her family.
Singapore
I’ve already mentioned this to needcake, but I’m not too big a fan of canon Singapore, so this is my oc version. Singapore is fascinating to me because it had only a very small local population before it became a colony (The original settlement had actually been destroyed by the Portuguese about two centuries before the British started building a port there.) So nation-tans like Singapore and Bermuda really are Arthur’s children in the most direct sense of the word. And yet, Singapore is mostly ethnically Chinese, with Malays being the second largest group. Growing up Asian in a white, Victorian era family surely cannot have been easy and more than once Singapore probably wondered if there hadn’t been some mistake. To make up for the constant fear that he wasn’t “really” British, Singapore studied ferociously and had a truly terrifying work ethic. I’m not sure if this is common knowledge outside Asian circles, so I’ll mention that this hc comes from the fact Singapore is well known for having truly exceptional students and some of the most prestigious schools. Singaporeans score highly in literally everything and they have an advantage with good English learning environments, a highly desirable trait in Asia, but these results come from brutally long hours — and its really saying something that they’re known for working hard, considering the studying ethic of students in Korea, Japan, and China aint nothing to sneeze at, either. To me this actually fits really well with Singapore’s upbringing in Arthur’s household, because Arthur himself prizes intelligence and hard work above all else, being a workaholic himself.
As for their relationship, it was probably the best when Singapore was young and peaked in the 1930s with the massive naval base the British built at Singapore, at the time the largest dry dock in the world. Singapore was a well-behaved child, not necessarily introverted but not rowdy either, and all the way into his teenage years he truly admired Arthur and was proud to be a part of the British Empire, despite his lingering unease and insecurities. The British defeat in World War II, however, was a massive turning point. He had worked his ass off to be a good son, a good brother, to contribute to the only family and system he had ever known, and he had thought by the 30s he was finally on his way to becoming a fine adult. And suddenly, the British surrender brings his entire world crashing down. He had followed the rules faithfully thinking it was his destiny, but suddenly it was clear that all rules were made up. Of course, his insecurities exploded. If the empire was a ruse, what the hell was he? A part of the illusion? He couldn’t have a truly Asian identity, because many of the old East Asian nations shunned him for his Western upbringing, and he could not entirely understand their values either. So he was a kid who kinda had to figure out late and very very suddenly who the fuck he was and wanted to be.
And, well, he’s done pretty well for himself, hasn’t he. After having a total crisis and questioning everything, I think Singapore slowly started to realize that just because the British Empire as a political entity didn’t last forever, that didn’t mean that his entire childhood and identity weren’t real. The love he gave to his siblings and the love he got back, the hard work he put in, his bond with Arthur and the safe, happy childhood he had — those memories and feelings didnt have to be diminished by what came after. Essentially, he learned the lesson all nations have to learn, which is that one needs to be able to discern between duties as a nation and feelings as a human being, and to some extent keep them separate to protect both.
Whoooooo ok I’ll stop there because this turned into a dissertation, sorry. Let me know if there are any specifics u want me to elaborate on or anything I missed, but I’ll leave this here for today :)
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