#Laz complains

[lazinesswrites]

Did I really wake up early and go all the way to the university library, in the rain, in order to motivate my self to actually work on my thesis instead of staying home and doing nothing, only to give up at lunch and write The Bad Batch fanfic instead?

Yes. Yes I did.

These clones are gonna be the end of me, clearly.

[lazaruspiss]

seeing ttgo still get called cartoon networks most hated show is so funny actually. like yeah. bc the other shows dont have grown adults running a hate-dom for them bc theyre a spin off of a good-to-mediocre show that some folks convinced themselves was gods gift to man. im sorry that the kids show is popular with kids lmao

[muralconservator]

thinking my conservator guy was raised in a wealthy family, and so he's like the type to parrot things he's heard from his family/his parents friends that could be considered insensitive not knowing that they are.... he's a nice person and he's not malicious but he of course he's a product of the kind of upbringing he had

[lariej]

this resort has such A Music Taste like in the past twenty music i’ve heard

- German ballads

- UK grime

- American Hip Hop

- French pop

- Country music

like i get it but also guys i’m begging u to create one playlist with a coherent theme

[lightofraye]

jared's relationship (or lack thereof) with the cast frankly weirds me out. is he ever supportive of their new projects? if he couldn't attend this event, he could have at the very least helped promote it if he believes in the cause. he has time to check twitter and get upset over what some teenagers are tweeting about him but not about his own nasty longstanding stans. neither does he have time to engage positively in good causes

i thought he so badly wanted to get on The Boys but he can't make the time to fly out and meet the show's faves and chill with them. does he really believe he's above it all?

i'm starting to believe fans truly do reflect their favorites and he's coming off petty and entitled. unfortunately, his attitude towards the cast translates into his fans calling everyone else "extras" and treating jensen as an accessory

look at jensen and misha surrounded by all the lovely people they've been friends with for years, and then look at jared in the corner all by himself

i'm not saying he owes anyone anything but for someone so chronically online to be ignoring the awesome things happening and focusing on his personal online bullies leaves a bad taste in my mouth

and using him not being in California as an excuse for not being there last night.

Rob and Ruth were in Scotland and they attended via Zoom. Not sure where Mark S or Curtis were, but they also attended via Zoom and weren't at the house with the others. Laz Alonso and Valorie Curry also attended via Zoom. There were other ways to be there.

He wasn't there either because he didn't want to be or he wasn't wanted. Pick your poison.

also stop being so hypocritical, you complain about Danneel cutting of Jensen when Jared does it as well and alot more. You complain when anyone makes a jokes a to Jensen about jensen but is comletely ok when Jared does the same.

You are such a fucking asshole that noone likes

I was wondering when the anti Jared folks would come out.

Given how Rob and Rich are banking on Destiel for their podcast, small wonder Jared does anything with them. Jensen is a far patient man than I would be. And Jared seemed to get along well with Ruth during duos recently.

And Jared didn’t beg Kripke at all. Kripke begged him! And he doesn’t engage with many folks on social media anymore. He’s grown as a person, has owned up to his issues.

Not everyone has to stay friends after their work has ended.

You can keep trying to paint him a bad person, but who’s the one getting pissy on social media about politics and his role? (Misha.) Who is trying to take fans’ data and sell it? (Misha.) Who tries to post thirst traps for money? (Misha.) Who tried to leverage Destiel for politics? (Misha.) Who exaggerates and lies about stories that netted death threats against Jared? (Misha.)

Y’all know you can’t win this argument. So again: why are you trying? Go write your Destiel fantasies on your blogs and leave me and other Jared fans be.

[lostonehero]

What remains after eternity

Homage

Lazarus has been in some sketchy places. Places not meant for human eyes. Places even gods feared to tread. However, that still didn't prepare him for this. Tim's mind seemed broken, worse than before. The air was humid and cold, and it smelled of rot. The area seemed to be abandoned.

A man, no, that wasn't right he looked like he was barely 19. His hair was cut in a military style, matching the uniform he was wearing. His blue eyes seemed distant. "You.... you shouldn't be here."

"I shouldn't be many places." Laz tilted his head. He didn't recognize the uniform, but that's probably because it's after his time on earth. He left and never looked back. "What happened?"

The kid looked down at his feet. "I was abandoned."

Laz reached out, and a bullet went through his hand. He takes a breath. "Let me help you."

"I can't be helped." Blue, tired eyes stared through Laz. "You don't belong here."

Laz was staring up at mechanical eyes, watching Tim wipe his mouth.

"What the fuck was that?" Lyf stared at the two.

Laz groans laying on the floor. "That is what happens when a mind is strong enough to force me out."

"Hurt you?" Tim tilted his head.

"No, I'm just. I'm just going to lie here." Laz takes a breath. "You ok?"

"Taste funny." Tim crouched down next to Laz poking at his leaking eyes.

"You probably shouldn't eat it, but I don't care." Laz looks over to Lyf. "If Thomas asks, I'm on the floor."

"Lazarus, seriously, what happened? Tim, don't eat that!" Lyf tries and fails to shoo Tim away.

Tim chuckles. "Like Jonny's babies."

"I'm not entertaining that comment." Laz sighs. "As I said, Tim's mind is strong enough to force me out. I need a moment before I even attempt again. Now, don't get me wrong. Strong doesn't mean healed it means dangerous. I'm going to have to talk to Scratch." He groans.

"Are you ok?" Lyf suppresses the urge to taste the fluid from Laz's eyes.

"Bruised ego mostly, with how long I've been at this, it's surprising to deal with this. Also, incredibly sore being forced out is really painful, but mostly hurt pride. I'm gonna be on the floor for awhile, sorry for making a mess, Aurora." Laz, let's out a breath.

"I've already called Brian and Thomas to grab him." Aurora chirps. "You depressed bastard."

"I resent that." Laz groans. "I am an orphan."

"I dont think that's the part you should be arguing." Lyf sighs. "Tim stop poking him."

"Hurt." Tim points at Laz.

"Not hurt." Laz huffs. "I'm just sore."

"Idiot." Lyf pinched his brow.

"I help." Tim gets up and grabs Laz with his vines.

"Fuck me." Laz can't even move his arms to cover his face.

"I will inform Brian and Thomas that Tim is taking him somewhere." Aurora sounded bemused.

"I'll follow as well." Lyf shakes his head.

.......

Jonny stepped out in his boxers, carrying Trevor on his back. "No more complaining, I'm taking you to your room."

"Dad, I can walk." Trevor mumbles he was pale, and his tail drooped behind him.

"You want to try that again?" Jonny huffs. "Just because all of you brats have my stubbornness doesn't mean that good thing."

Trevor huffs back. "Not a baby."

"Yeah, yeah, a big, strong man." Jonny chuckles. "Come on off to your room."

Trevor mutters something intelegalible.

"Dad! Trevor! Are you guys ok?" Thomas rolls over. "Just go without me, Brian."

Brian nods and keeps moving forward.

"Where were you two running to?" Jonny raised a brow.

"Tommy." Trevor reached out, then dropped his hand and yawns.

Jonny smiles with a sigh. "This is why I'm carrying you." He turns to Thomas. "Are you guys ok? Trevor told me what you guys were doing, and thank you."

"It was Trevor's idea." Thomas rubs the back of his neck. "Tim is carrying Laz around, and Laz got kicked out of Tim's head, which is the first time I've ever heard that happening. Laz claims he isn't hurt but can't move because he's sore like he overworked his body. He heals fast, so I'm not worried, but I am a bit concerned about what Tim thinks help means."

Jonny chuckles. "They'll be fine. Join in taking your brother back to his room."

Thomas adjusts his chair and rolls after his dad. "I... I can tell you what happened to him."

"I don't need to know." Jonny smiles softly. "You brats have your -"

"Tommy, tell dad. Gonna tell dad." Trevor groans, hiding his face in his father's shoulder. "Dad should know. Doctors aren't nice."

"I... Trevor, that literally has nothing to do with the terminus curse." Thomas pinched his brow.

"Your brother is on a different plane of reality at the moment Thomas cut him slack." Jonny snickers. "Come on, Trevor, we'll be there soon."

"Dad I was bad." Trevor mumbles.

"So am I." Jonny hums. "You ain't special."

"Noooo!" Trevor whines.

"Thomas, tell your brother no serious conversation when he's mentally gone." Jonny sighs.

"I don't think anything I'll say will help." Thomas frowns. "Trevor doesn't talk about where he was sent to when he turned 25. I was with Mae. We had each other to figure this out. Alex, well, they were just dropped with Aiden, so they were fine even met Izzy and Laz before we did. Janet, well, you already know how that was."

"It's bad." Trevor whines. "I was bad."

"Again, that's not special, you brat." Jonny huffs. "Would you like to hear my list of crimes?"

Trevor is quiet.

"That's what I thought." Jonny sighs. "There is ain't anything you brats can do to make me hate you nor be worse than I was. Hell, even Brian has done bad things, and he's the good one out of us."

"Baba, I'm sorry." Trevor whimpers.

Jonny stops in front of Trevor's room. "Alright, alright, that's enough. We ain't talking till you rest properly."

Thomas watches his dad wrap his brother up in blankets as tight as he can manage.

Trevor relaxes almost immediately and starts to purr as he falls asleep.

"What do you want me to wrap you up to?" Jonny crosses his arms with a smirk.

Thomas blushing. "I would say yes, but my legs are fused in this position, and I'm worried about my arms. Can I have a raincheck."

Jonny chuckles and shuts Trevor's door and ruffles Thomas's hair. "Yeah, yeah. Come on, I'm going to make Trevor's favorite meal, and you'll help me."

"I think I can manage." Thomas chuckles.

........

Marius blinks, staring at Lazarus, dropped in his nest by Tim, who just left. "How can I help you?"

"Your nest is weird compared to Thomas's." Laz blinks. "Um, kind of overdid it and got thrown out of Tim's head. My body is sore all over, and I can't move. I really don't know why Tim dumped me in here."

"I am a doctor." Marius frowns. "Although he could have just put you in the infirmary. I don't understand how he gets in here. My door is locked for a reason."

"In his defense, I don't think he knows either." Laz huffs. "I don't need a doctor. I just need to rest a night or two of sleep it will fix this. It's been a very long time, but that is what fixes this." He looks away. "Scratch would tell you the same. He's the one who taught me to go into people's heads."

"It sounds like this isn't normal." Marius hums, placing a blanket around Laz. "Why do you think you were kicked out?"

Laz narrows his gaze. "I was warned about this." He sighs. "Fine, I'll play along, but none of this leaves this room. It's not good."

"Doctor patient privilege, your secrets are safe with me, or I'll just forget." Marius frowns.

"I don't envy your position either. I can look in your head when I'm up to it if you like." Laz pauses. "Nothing too bad just to see how fractured your mind is if it is even that. I won't look at any memories that would require you to be asleep. Can't get consent if you're asleep."

"That is kind of you, but I rather you didn't." Marius takes a breath. "So why is this bad?"

"It's good and bad. Good because his mind is strong, and he's in there fighting. Bad because it's incredibly unstable. He's going to have more of these reality slips before it gets better. There isn't an easy way to say this, but we will have to keep those cages and things set up for future use." Laz looks back at Marius.

Marius sighs. "I had a feeling that would be the case." He crosses his arms. "Do you want me to carry you back to your room?"

"What, you aren't going to ask more questions?" Laz raised a brow.

"I don't need to. You don't have the information and are assuming." Marius gets up as Laz flinches.

"You purposely make the others underestimate you." Laz, let's out a soft oof as he is picked up.

Marius hums softly.

.......

Lyf stops. "O-oh, when did Tim get in o-your room."

"It is ours, Lyf. I appreciate what you're trying to do, but we are bonded. It always will be ours." Marius hums.

"Like I get it, no memory and whatever, but your body remembers isn't that enough?" Laz blinks. "I mean, your hair literally triggered the heat before you got to this state."

"Why do you know that?" Marius raised his brow.

"I never said I didn't know the xeon language. I just can't speak it. It doesn't work well with human vocal cords." Laz sighs. "Look, I don't have a dog in this race, but that's just my two cents. Neither of you can predict the future, so why dance around the present like you two are strangers?"

"Because I'm not an asshole?" Lyf rolls his eyes. "Why are you such a dick?"

"Age mostly." Laz tries to shrug and fails. "Also, the fact I really don't like romcoms. Even if you don't remember Marius, you clearly have feelings for Lyf, and Lyf is so head over heels for you that he would follow you to the end of time."

Marius blushes a mix of purple and black.

Lyf matches the blush with his own.

"No wonder why everyone gets annoyed at you two." Laz sighs. "This is clearly not working, so either drop me in the infirmary you've passed twice, or I can keep going."

"I... uh...." Marius swallows.

Lyf covers his face and groans.

"Please don't use me as an excuse to spend time together. It's weird." Laz sighs. "Can you please just drop me off."

"R-right." Marius quickly rushed back to the infirmary to drop Laz off into a bed.

.......

Marius sits in the gardens next to Lyf. "I..."

"Ivy told me about what happened." Lyf rubs his arm. "I just want to go at your pace. I didn't want to make you feel unwanted."

"I don't feel..." Marius reached out, lacing his fingers with Lyf's. "I don't know what is truly me from the instincts and hormones. I know I feel safe with you. It's still so fresh in my mind, and I get thrust here. I'm supposed to be different. Myself now has long past."

Lyf sighs. "You're still Marius, and the past few centuries, I've learned so much about you, and I will learn something else new as time moves on. I look forward to eternity with you no matter what time period your mind is in." He smiles. "Also how the fuck did you get doctor from mechanical engineer? Just because you're medically trained now doesn't mean it makes any sense to me. I can handle mech pilot, I can handle your insanity, but that what the fuck Marius?"

Marius blushes, shaking in a silent story. "That's a funny story, actually."

Lyf listens with a stupid smile on his face, which is cut short when Brian trots in not human shaped. "Oh, uh, hello."

"Hello Brian." Marius smiles then gives a soft oof as Brian lays on both Marius and Lyf. "Ivy was right. You are taking advantage of your new form."

Brian chitters and yawns.

Lyf chuckles. "He is quite soft. Tell me more about your adventures."

Marius smiles. "I guess we do now have the time."

The peace was interrupted. "So this is cute and all, but I have a few questions."

A eerie yelp came from Brian's maw as he skittered back and returned to a human shape. Marius shouted in shock, and his horns grew in an instant. Lyf shrieked and stumbles back.

"Rude, anyway." Mae hops out of the tree.

Lyf takes a breath. "Have you been there the whole time?"

"No, I was following you two from the vents earlier." Mae grins. "For being an acolyte, you're not very observant. Also, I love watching Laz get annoyed with other people's romantic problems. It's the only thing that really annoys him ironically, considering how he gets with Thomas."

Marius takes a few deep breaths, calming down that his horns return to nubs. "Why? Isn't it dangerous given your older body?"

"Rude again, not made of glass." Mae rolls her eyes. "However, I was looking for dad, but you guys seemed more interesting at the moment. As much as listening in on you two falling in love again, I really don't care, so I actually wanted to interrupt to ask Lyf a few questions about his god."

"Why do you want to know about Yog Sogoth?" Brian beat Lyf to the question.

"I'm making a timeline. You see the God's realm is separate from time and space kind of so the events of Gram's murder spree happened, I want to see if it happened before or after your galaxy was eaten." Mae shrugs. "I've been working with Laz on it for ages. It's weird because it affected Laz when it happened almost immediately because Scratch picked him when he just became whole again, which was before humans even went to the moon the first time. However, thinking reality wise, the bifrost happens eons later."

"That's a question for Jonny." Marius blinks, getting a headache trying to figure out the sheer math.

"Isn't that like a paradox?" Lyf stares blankly at Mae.

"I was a doctor, now a pilot, so I can't help you." Brian sighs. "Again, as Marius said, that kind of stuff is Jonny's expertise."

"You guys are useless." Mae huffs. "It's basic theoretical mathematics and creating a timeline. You would think you guys would have thought of something." She grumbles as she walks away.

"It's like a second, Jonny." Brian blinks.

"Fuck you're right." Lyf rubs his temples.

Marius smiles. "Jonny is a really good dad."

.......

"Aha, that's where you went." Scratch appeared next to Lazarus in the infirmary. "Alright, I know you hate this, but I would like to confirm what Thomas told me and Valerie."

Lazarus was in a church, his leaking eyes were replaced with amber eyes, his black hair was brown, and in a loose ponytail. He was in priest garb and seemed to be praying. "I told you I didn't want you in my head without discussing first." He leans back in the pew.

Scratch sits next to Laz. "Never thought you would ever come back here."

"Consider it nostalgia. It's been a long time since someone was strong enough to send me out." Laz sighs. "I suppose that is why you're here."

"That's one reason. Is it too much to want to check on you?" Scratch smiles.

"Still not my father." Laz smiles softly. "Tim's mind is strong, and even with my strength, I was unprepared for how he would lash out. I don't think they filmed everything, nor was it accurate for how long he was being tortured. The first few lobotomizes failed."

"I know." Scratch crosses his arms. "I've been scrubbing over the videos, and there are purposeful sections missing. There's a reason why so many of us enjoy humanity, and it's not for good reasons."

"Anything that could help me?" Laz thinned his lips. "Anything you're willing to share?"

"I don't want you to go back in his head, not until I can have a look." Scratch sits up. "I respect your abilities and how powerful you are even compared to myself. However, I would even state a claim that my own father would be horrified at the things done, and I don't think I've ever considered him to have a limit." He sighs.

Laz frowns. "What do you want me to do? I'm not just going to sit back. Tim is important to my father in law and the entire crew of Aurora and Thomas and his siblings already consider him a second father."

"Do you still have that cloak?" Scratch looks at Laz, who grimaced.

"I do." Laz sighs.

"Keep it close." Scratch gets up. "And you have Thomas to look after. I may be able to-"

"No. That isn't my decision. As I said before, stop offering me that." Laz scowls. "Get out and let me pray to beings who never existed."

Scratch frowns. "I apologize again." He vanishes, leaving Lazarus alone.

Laz returns to softly praying as he turns his head down.

.......

"Oi fuckhead wake up." Alex crosses their arms standing over Trevor who groans.

"Fuck off Alex." Trevor huffs. "I'm comfy."

"Dad made you dinner." Alex rolls their eyes. "Get the fuck up and enjoy it. The others think it's poisoned because they don't trust dad's ability to cook." They pause. "Hasn't actually stopped Marius or Lyf, though."

"Are they disappointed?" Trevor struggles out of the tightly wrapped blanket.

"Oh, immensely, but I can't tell which one." Alex snickers when Trevor throws his shirt at them and gets a clean one.

Trevor yawns and rubs his eyes. "Alright, alright, I'm coming." He groans as he hops out of bed. "My body still hurts."

"Thomas says that's normal." Alex smirks.

"Fuck Thomas." Trevor scoffs.

"Laz is already doing that." Alex chuckles, pulling back their hair. They were always the first to go completely gray.

"I hate you." Trevor rolls his eyes.

They both playfully banter all the way to the dining hall.

"You two don't have to look so disappointed." Jonny huffs, his tail lashing behind him.

"I wanted to eat something bad." Marius scowls eating a second helping.

Jonny rolls his eyes. "Again banned from baking."

Marius puffs out his cheeks. "Damnit."

Lyf snickers. "Ignore him this is very good."

"Damn right, it is." Jonny huffs. "You two brats sit the fuck down and I'll feed ya."

Trevor nods and sits next to Thomas, who is eating quietly. Alex sits across from Marius and Lyf.

Thomas swallows his bite and puts his fork down. "How are you holding up?"

"I'm still in fucking pain." Trevor sighs. "But you already know that. I want to go back to bed." He thanks his dad for the food.

"It doesn't really get easier, but you'll get used to it." Thomas crossed his arms. "What were you talking about before?"

Trevor raised a brow. "Before what?"

"When dad was carrying you right before he bundled you up in blankets." Thomas raised a brow.

"Well, I know dad is the one who did that because you could never get it right, but we were talking?" Trevor matched the raised brow.

Jonny sits next to Trevor. "I told you so."

Thomas huffs. "Shut up."

Trevor has a look of mild confusion. "Genuinely, I have no idea what you are talking about or why dad's right. Um, where Laz? He's normally glued to your side when your legs go."

"Infirmary." Thomas sighs. "Speaking of which, where is Tim?"

"I didn't put a tracker on him." Jonny rolls his eyes. "He's a grown ass adult even with a fucked up mind he can defend himself and he's somewhere on Aurora or my mom's ship. Aurora would alarm if he left."

"Tim is currently napping in his patch of dirt in the garden. He is lying face down, and a new thing has happened flowers have grown over him like a blanket." Aurora chirps. "Also, Nastya is coming to kill the thing you cooked even though I told her it was proper food. I understand why she doesn't trust you that creature is still in my vents."

"I can fucking cook!" Jonny huffs as his kids snicker around him.

"Unfortunately, I have to agree because I was craving something burnt." Marius sighs, laying his head on the table.

Alex snickers louder.

"You burn baked goods, not an actual meal." Mae scoffs. "That's a waste of good meat."

"I can set something on fire if that will help." Janet smiles from her seat.

"I really rather you wouldn't." Lyf frowns.

"Surprise the space cop is a fucking downer." Mae rolls her eyes.

"No fun allowed." Janet huffs.

"Why are you even here?" Alex gets up with their plate.

Thomas chuckles. "Fucker can't handle a little arson."

"I'm going to flick lit matches at you." Trevor clicks his tongue.

"Jonny, control your children." Lyf looks over to glare.

"One they are adults and can do what they want and two you're being a little bitch." Jonny grins.

Marius snorts laughing.

Aurora chirps out a laugh. "I agree with your children they need a new siblings."

Jonny growls. "I'm going to say no on principal now you fucks."

"So I fucking told you!" Thomas huffs.

.......

"Lazarus wasn't wrong. This place sure is a mess." Scratch hums softly, walking through a horror scene. "You are quite strong, but you are still merely human."

"Get out! You don't belong here!" A voice shouts, and rotten vines tries to grab Scratch but go right through him.

"That is quite cute. You keep trying, but I'm not leaving till I get to your center." Scratch groans. "I sound more like my dad every day." He phases through a shut door, and the scenery changes. "Oh!"

A man with bouncing curls and coffee color skin stares at Scratch. He has a pair of broken goggles on a worn military uniform on. He was sitting in a bunk on a base that no longer existed in reality.

"It's not often I get find surprises." Scratch smiles with too many teeth. "How long have you been in here?" Are you even aware of the world around since you died?"

The man frowns. "I got stuck in here trying to get Timmy to notice me, but I just went through him. I think I realized I was dead at that point, but I ended up here. Did we win?"

"You humans are fascinating creatures. However, does it really matter if you guys won or not? The war has long been forgotten. Times a fickle bitch like that." Scratch tilts his head. "However, this is a problem. You're unknowingly blocking Tim from recovering, well, not blocking, making it harder. You really are out of the loop. I can fix that."

"Fix...? What did you do to Tim?" The man growls and gasps as he his picked up by his throat.

"Now don't get feisty, I have to figure out how this will work. A deal would suffice, wouldn't you agree?" Scratch hums. "You don't really have a choice because I will remove you either way."

"What are you?" The man growls.

Scratch smiles. "A god, for one. Two, how about I take you out and give you a form that will last just as long as Tim will, and in exchange, you'll be permanently removed from his head."

"Fine. Fine, you win. I don't buy the god thing, you bloody devil." The man vanishes with Scratch.

Scratch cracks his back, holding a glowing green flame in his hand as a black goo surrounds it, and it becomes a pair of dog tags. He places them down in the garden and vanishes.

TS finds the dog tags and assumes they're Jonny's.

.......

"Attetion, there is an intruder that has suddenly appeared in front of Jonny's door. They are wearing a male uniform from the moon war where Jonny picked up Tim. He has broken goggles on and has brown skin and big ringlet curls. They currently don't seem hostile and frankly look quite confused. However, you may use this information how you wish, and Nastya has given me permission to use my alarms until they are apprehended. Happy hunting!" The robotic female voice was the first thing Bertie heard as he got to his feet.

"Where the fuck am I?" Bertie shakes his head and pulls down his goggles. He heard shouting and decided to run would be better than to confront people who were hunting him.

"Remember we want him alive. That means no lethal force, as if any of you is capable of that." The woman laughs through the speakers.

"Found him!" A voice rings out.

"Use me at a battering ram!" A different voice shouts.

"Dibs!"

"Fuck!"

Bertie keeps running adrenaline running in his veins as he runs into an open garden. He didn't have time to dwell on the face. There is something like this on a spaceship. He screams in shock as his feet get lifted off the ground and he is hanging upside down.

"Hi Bertie!" A entirely familiar cheery voice answers.

"T-Tim?!" Bertie gasps adrenaline fading. "W-wha-" His vision went black.

.....

"Fucking second time he gets to end the hunt." Ashes growls.

Jonny froze. "Ashes shut up." He runs towards Tim and motions to his kids to stay. "Tim what did you call him?"

"You know him, it's Bertie." Tim smiles wide.

"Tim, Bertie is dead." Jonny steps back as Tim steps closer to him.

"He doesn't bleed right, but it is Bertie." Tim pulls Jonny into a hug. "He's wearing what he died in trying to save you, which was very stupid." He says while smiling. He kets go of Jonny. "His goggles are even broken from where you headbutted him to try to remove your gas mask to put on him. It was quite a stupid death."

Jonny swallows. "Tim, how about we put Bertie down? Trevor wants to talk to you."

Tim pauses his expression flickers for a moment before Bertie's unconscious body falls to the ground. "Not mad?"

Trevor is pushed in front of his siblings. "I uh no? Why would I be mad? I mean, it was bound to happen. If not you, it would be something else."

"That is a fair argument for our track record." Mae points to Janet.

"Again rude but fair." Janet shrugs. "To be fair, I was expecting you to say Alex because they always get into fights over their rigged bets."

"I mean that would work too and I'm not against it." Alex shrugs.

"Thomas?" Mae smirks looking at her twin.

"Fuck you." Thomas huffs.

"I mean, if you aren't gonna say it, you have a terrible temper." Trevor thins his lips.

"The embodiment of too angry to die." Mae snickers.

Thomas pinched his brow and sighed heavily.

Trevor realized that dad was using this to pick up Bertie and get him somewhere to be looked over. "Um, can I get a hug? I mean, as a thank you to get this over with."

Tim's lips quirked up into a smile. "Hug, baby?"

"Not really a baby, but sure." Trevor gasps as Tim runs and pulls him into a tight hug. "Actually, you know what? I'm not leaving. You have a tight hug." He starts to purr as his face gets red.

"Good baby!" Tim smiles wide.

"Tim, I think you keep doing that he's going to fall asleep." Thomas clears his throat sort of jealous.

"Fuck that I want a nap. Hug me next." Mae also caught up quickly. She also really missed being bundled up tight, but just like her dad will never admit it.

Tim looks behind him. "Jonny took Bertie." He holds Trevor in a bridal carry. "That's ok. You are very good." He turns back and smiles. "Babies are mine now!"

Trevor shakes his head out of his daze. "Wait what?"

Tim grabs the rest of them with his vines. "Naptime for clever babies."

"I mean, at least he's taking me in my chair." Thomas sighs.

"Don't wanna break legs." Tim hums as he begins to wall forward.

"Honestly, though, wouldn't mind a nap." Alex yawns.

"That's because you pulled an all-nighter creating a new betting pool with Aurora on the probability of us getting new siblings and what gender they will pick." Janet rolls her eyes.

Mae raised a brow. "And you thought I was bad about you and Laz."

Thomas blinks. "Actually, yeah, I think Alex is the worst now."

"I stand by my creations." Alex crosses their arms. "Also, everyone who knew already placed bets."

Thomas just shakes his head.

"Babies need nap now." Tim hums the tune of Tim goes crazy.

.......

"I have to say this is the first time I've ever seen something like this." Carmillia laughs. "I can't say I'm bored with my imprisonment."

"I hate to say it, but Carmillia is right. I have no idea what to make of this." Raphaella sighs. "Tests literally show nothing wrong but his blood is a different color."

"Of course it doesn't." Laz groans walking into the lab. "I know excatly what this is and who did this."

"Care to share?" Carmillia crosses her arms.

"Scratch, the god who made me their acolyte. I had a feeling a spirit was trapped in his head, but I didn't really think he would be pulled out, let alone given a physical body again. Remove his dog tags." Laz points and Raphealla does, and the body vanishes. "It's always anchored. Those dog tags are his anchor he'll reform once you put them down."

"Is this common?" Raphaella tilts her head, placing the tags down, watching with interest as Bertie reappers.

Laz huffs out a bitter laugh. "It's the closest you'll find Scratch acting like his father. It's cruel, and there is only a handful of these I've seen. Bertie has been cut off from ever moving on, and of course, he had to agree to it for it to work. The only peace he can now get is having his anchor in a place he can not reform. Those tags are indestructible. Trust me, I've seen the attempts at trying." He steps forward. "Get Jonny back in here. It would be best if you had someone he knew to explain this." He vanishes without another word.

Raphealla frowns. "How uquine, I wouldn't mind testing the limits with consent, of course." She quickly grins.

"That sounds splendid." Carmillia grins back.

.......

Jonny holds his jaw and sighs. "One, if you're going to punch me, make sure you're prepared." He raised his brow as Bertie curses, holding his hand. "Two, I can't change the fact that time has passed. Be mad, but know this is your reality now."

"Bloody fuck, what is wrong with your face?" Bertie rubs his broken hand.

"New Texans such as myself have reinforced bones for starters, and our skulls are built to take damage, hence why I headbutt." Jonny motions to his horns. "Also, why do you think New Texans are short? Our skin is padded, and our bodies are made for impacts. We have denser body mass for a reason. I can pull myself out of a sandpit being buried alive. You humans ain't the default."

Bertie sighs. "Fine, I don't have to like it, but why are you telling me any of this? Why hasn't Tim come out to talk to me?"

Jonny frowns and looks away. "That's another reason, Tim's hurt."

"You're immortal. Try again." Bertie scowls.

"We can still be hurt." Jonny mutters quietly. He takes a breath and grabs Bertie. "It would be better if you saw the truth because you're sure as shit ain't gonna believe me."

Bertie follows with uncertainty in his features. They arrive on a different ship.

A woman stood in the entrance with a raised brow. She was the same height as Jonny, her horns curled around her ears, unlike Jonny's. She looked similar to Jonny. Her arms were crossed. "What brings you here?"

Jonny sighs. "Unfortunately, this man won't believe me if I tell him the truth." He looked uncomfortable. "I need dad to show him the stuff about Tim."

The woman frowns and unhooks her watch, handing it over to Jonny. "Are you sure?"

"I won't be watching." Jonny sighs. "Bertie here will be watching till he asks for it to stop."

Bertie narrows his gaze. "How can I trust you didn't fuck with the footage."

"I wish it was doctorared." Jonny shakes his head, tossing the watch to Bertie. "Show him the truth."

Bertie rolls his eyes. "Whatever you say."

The watch comes to life, and the video starts to play. Jonny heads inside with the woman.

........

"Was it really wise to leave that man with your father watching that?" Valerie sips her tea.

Jonny frowns. "The idiot got himself killed, giving me the gas mask. I tried to save him, but he's stubborn." He shakes his head. "No, he's angry, and I don't think anything I could say would make him believe me. He shouldn't have to see Tim like this without the context."

"You've become a good man, Jonny." Valerie smiles. "I'm glad we finally got to reunite."

Jonny smiles softly. "I suppose I can't argue with ya mom." He sighs. "What did Scratch even do?"

"Well, from what he told me, he found Bertie in Tim's head. Which isn't unheard of spirits getting trapped in the living quite often, and when that living person dies, they move on together. Well, that's how it's supposed to happen." Valerie sips her tea. "Although obviously none of us stay dead for that to work. Apparently, Bertie was creating a block unintentionally and so Scratch removed him. It's his fault for accepting the deal."

Jonny nods and stops before he makes a noise when Bertie runs in, throwing the watch at Jonny, which Valerie catches.

"You're so fucked up! How the fuck did you create this?" Bertie was fuming.

Valerie puts the watch back on reconnecting it to something Bertie doesn't see. "Now, he didn't create that. You have humanity to thank for that."

"What? So you're saying... you're saying.... bloody hell." Bertie covers his face.

Jonny sighs getting up. "I tried to warn you. We can't die, but that doesn't mean we can't be hurt, tortured, get sick, and destroyed. Tim.... Tim is recovering. He should be napping with my brats."

"Oh, he is. TS sent me pictures." Valerie smiles softly.

"Wait, one, you have kids?" Bertie stares at Jonny. "Who would have your kids?"

"Me." Jonny rolls his eyes. "Why do people keep asking me that?"

Bertie pauses as something clicks. "Oh right, um, sorry.... also, isn't Tim radioactive? Shouldn't you be worried about your kids?"

Jonny snickers. "We're from a desert planet. We don't have the thing Earth has protecting it from a suns radiation." He takes a breath. "Besides, that isn't what you should be worried about. How Tim reacts to being woken should be your concern."

"What?" Bertie stares at Jonny.

.......

Tim is curled around Laz, who looked annoyed. Thomas was awake trying very hard not to laugh. Everyone else was out cold.

Bertie and Jonny stared at the scene.

Jonny opens his mouth and pauses. "How did Laz get involved?"

Thomas covers his mouth taking a deep breath.

Laz huffs, causing Tim to curl around tighter. "I made the mistake of looking for my partner."

Bertie quietly. "Is he an alien too?"

Jonny snorts. "No, he's human."

"But his eyes." Bertie motions to his own face.

Jonny starts to cackle manically. He wakes up everyone.

"I'm so glad you find this hilarious." Laz sighs as Tim hugs tighter.

"Mmmm, Jonny." Tim mutters. "Laz is a good pillow priest."

This causes Thomas to break laughing. "I'm fucking stealing that."

"I hate everyone in this room." Laz groans.

"Tim, come on, get up. Bertie wants to talk to you." Jonny sighs.

Tim unwrapped himself and got up rubbing his face, Bertie notes that he purposely avoids his eyes. "Ok we can talk."

Bertie takes in the image of his friend. Tim was skinny, skinner than even the worst times on the base. He was pale and looked exhausted. His hair was buzzed short, and he knew the man hated it when it was buzzed for the military. The vines did come out of his skin, and it looked swollen like he was tugging at them. His clothes were purposely hemmed to be shorts and short sleeved. He had a pair of goggles around his neck, and he had a feeling that was just out of comfort. There was a longer lanyard around his neck with a strange dial. He didn't know what that was. "Hey Tim, it's been a while."

"You've been dead." Tim tilts his head.

[empiriical]

"oh, i get it," elmer says, voice cheerful as ever, as if he's solved a riddle instead of, apparently, the inner workings of a hitman-with-no-record's mind. "hm. that's too bad."

elmer, for all his lack of tact, has a keen intuition. smiles reveal so much. but even in the absence of one...

"what you're saying is that you want something that would result in you not being able to be considered 'good' by other people's standards. you're definitely not the only person in the world who has that desire! although, i think they're thinking more less about what other people think, && more about what they want. && that's fair too! if it makes them happy, who am i to judge?"

smiling brilliantly at laz, elmer has a look about him of a mad genius math professor who's just completed an enigmatic equation. then he claps his hands together in childish delight, && that illusion is shattered. "that's the thing — i really don't care if you're good or not. as long as you can smile, nothing else matters to me. although, if you're going to kill people at some point in the future, could you do me a favor && try to make sure they die happy? then everyone wins!"

then, expression turning oddly serious, he places a hand on the man's shoulder, forcing eye contact. "so i guess that just leaves one issue, mister gunmeister smith — will killing someone make you happy?"

❛ you're a pretty good guy yourself, so relax and just live. ❜ / elmer for laz. idk what this is. take it

He stops short before managing to speak, jaw shutting with a quick snap so he doesn't say something he's not prepared to.

They haven't encountered eachother more than once, so Laz doesn't know what to make of Elmer C. Albatross quite yet. He's something like the simplest possible enigma---while Laz can figure him out relatively quickly, the question was never "what". It was "how".

Obviously, he shouldn't want to hear something like that. It's the opposite of the image he strives for, though he gets the impression that Elmer wouldn't actually fear him even if he were a madman who killed for the fun of it. In any case, there's not really a reason Laz should want to hear the words "you're a pretty good guy" out of anyone's mouth, even if it is coming from someone like Elmer.

Not everyone is as quick to accept the things people lay out in front of them as Graham.

He reaches up and tugs the brim of his hat just enough to obscure his eyes, which surely hold unwarranted frustration.

"Tch ... As if you could assign a word like 'good' to a lunatic."

But Elmer isn't wrong. He's the only hitman he knows to have yet to take a life, and he's too cowardly to carry through with something like that in the first place. Laz knows that if there were ever such a thing as a "good" hitman, he would be the closest thing to it.

"Those of us with ambition don't have the luxury of relaxing. If even one person still thinks I'm good, I haven't done enough."

just elmer things. / accepting.

[arcadekore]

sketches and notes of some of the antags in polarity skies I did for fun :] most of the antags are tied to the Hearth, a cult led by Ambrose, a cosmic being of higher power hoping to take over the Earth from Elysia, the current guardian of the world. Ambrose’s plan of course is to reset the entire world by using Lazarus’ (aka the big sad emo man that hangs out with Celeste) dormant powers to enact what he calls the rapture. Laz of course doesnt really want that so he fucked off to Celeste to help and Ambrose will stop at nothing to get him back!

At his crew are Sylvain, a power-hungry executive, formerly a soldier for Elysia’s angel knights, arguably the most powerful one before defecting . He works in the big city and it seems like he likes to be stressed just for the sake of complaining about it. He believes he’d make a better leader of the Hearth. He also hates Laz’s guts.

Next is Wesley, a young hacker recently employed by the Hearth and causes terror online in the basement of an abandoned bar. From trolling to hacking or scamming people online with pump-and-dump crypto, Wesley takes care of anything computer related with his genius and with the help of his powers to manipulate technology.

Lastly is Mira, a former angel knight like Sylvain, she was initially murdered after uncovering some evidence of Elysia’s cruelty within the angel knights. After Sylvain defected the knights he asked Ambrose for help and revived her with….consequences. Now she’s a shell of her former self, seen more as a “burden” than anything else.

I didn’t include Rosella because although she’s an antagonist in the first arc, she’s not necessarily fully affiliated w the Hearth.

Intro to celesteverse is here!

[laz-kay]

Just a few kiddos🥹

Hey, loves. Hope your weekends have gone smoothly. I personally feel like I haven’t had one, but that’s work’s fault. In honesty, couldn’t complain about my shift yesterday, but I’m just pissed that it was a nice day out and I spent the majority of it in work dealing with other people’s bullshit. Alas.

Today was no better tbf. I spent it helping my folks with all the stuff I couldn’t do for them yesterday, and as soon as I got the chance to sit and do something for myself, something else came up. It is what it is. Work begins at 12 tomorrow, and I’m seriously considering just handing in my notice and hoping to lucifer something else comes up before too long.

The dream would be for someone to come up to me and say “hey, Laz. Wanna be a contracted voice actor for x amount of years for a cartoon that’s sure to blow everyone’s tits off?!” but I sadly live in the real world of working class Britain, but I’ll never make it unless I try. Problem is, work means I have 0 time to do that.

I’ll try not to wallow too much this week if I can, but it’s hard. My brother’s birthday’s coming up which should be a laugh. I’m excited to give him his gifts!😇

[robotspacealien]

An old snippet I wrote for the Pitfighter AU I think last year? It’s almost certainly outdated, but here have it anyway :>

Cw: blood, death, injury, shock

To The Victor Goes Tomorrow

Orion’s first victory and the toll it took on him.

Orion's back hit the dusty arena floor, leaving him in a graceless sprawl, eyes suddenly squinting up against too-bright stadium lights and the grey sky just beyond them- and then he was scrambling unright- every second not on your feet is a death sentence- fear driving him to stand up again on unsteady legs. Quickly cooling energon- not all his, too much to be all his- dripped off his frame to spatter and soak into the dirt underfoot.

His frame all but trembled with exhaustion as nervous electricity and pain signals pinged off his circuits in-time, it was an effort to move at all- keep going! keep going! keep going!

He whipped around to face his opponent again- stupid, stupid why’d you give him your back- surprised the other mech wasn’t on him again already-

The big red hauler sat hardly holding himself up on one arm, armor involuntarily flared and quivering in shock, yellow optics wide and panicked, staring into the sky at nothing. The blunt end of a pike stuck out from a gap in his collar flaring that otherwise protected his neck, just under his jaw, the weapon speared down, down, deep as Orion could drive it into him, forcing the mech’s head into an awkward, upward angle.

Red paint was streaked in wide bands of blue as energon seeped out of him in a steady flow, from his intake, from around the pike, from the sputtering, drowning vents in his abdomen, his whole frame hitching as it tried to inhale and found that it couldn’t.

The roar of the crowd seemed to cave in on Orion, the deafening cacophony burying him alive, dread nailing him to the spot and heavy enough to nearly make his wobbling knees buckle. He stared blankly forward, gaze locked on the mech as his optics dimmed to black and the one arm holding him up gave out, the quickly graying body slumping fully onto the floor in slow motion.

A voice boomed, louder than anything, stinging his frying audio sensors, and drowning out the roaring static of the crowd, “LAZARUS TAKES THE WIN AND LIVES ANOTHER DAY!”

The crowd screamed,“LAZ-UR-US!” several times over in response, cheering for him, congratulating him, shaking the arena as they stomped their feet in unison in time with the syllables of the name that wasn't his.

The medics filed out onto the floor shortly after the chant faded, two other gladiators in tow to scrape the large corpse off the ground. One of the fighters pulled the pike from the dead mech’s neck in one last spill of energon and heaved him onto a slab to be carried off. The medics watched and did not bother to put their hands on him, they were here for little more than formality and would be busy picking the mech apart the moment they got him into the medbay. Orion was gestured by one of them to follow as they made their exit, not waiting to see if he actually could- but he’s numbly limping behind them regardless as they descended down into the tunnels below and out of sight.

The darkness of the entrance gave way to the pale yellow of artificial lights, the noise of the arena muffled and the sound of metal footsteps on stone suddenly hurt his adjusting audials. He was still fixed on the dead mech, an arm hung off the slab just visible around the bulk of one of the gladiators and it bounced with the pair’s every step, blue dripping off of red fingers and leaving a sporadic trail behind them.

A medic, he doesn't look to see which one, complains about the mess he’s made.

Something he couldn’t name hit him and suddenly he wasn’t following any of them anymore, unsure when he turned off into a side-tunnel, alone and far from himself as his body moved purposelessly forward.

He walked until the noise of the arena and the sound of another fight starting above was only a dull roar barely heard through the stone, until his systems wound down more and more and he could properly feel the toll the fight had taken on his frame, pain creeping up his struts as his injuries made themselves known. In a shiver, his knees gave out, the hydrologics in his legs finally giving up and depressurizing in a long hiss. His shoulder hit the wall as his frame pivoted to lean on it, shaking as he fought to stay upright, to keep standing, but his body had no fight left and quickly gave into gravity, slowly sliding down the wall and leaving a streak of paint and dried energon behind until his aft hit the floor.

He curled into himself there in the silence under the dim lighting of the hardly-used passageway, anchoring himself in the pain clawing through his neuralnet and the even cycling of his vents, He tried hard not to see the image of the dying mech branded into his permanent memory. His crest had been ripped almost clean off and the exposed circuitry stung as he rested his forehead on his filthy knees when he pulled them in close to his chest. The sound of tiny shards of glass hitting his armor and then the floor as the busted glass of his chestplate shed more of itself as he tried to ball himself up tightly.

He was shaking enough to hear his armor rattle as he stared into the dark pocket of his body- the biolights that should be there having been long-since destroyed and never replaced- his optics being the only thing to cast its dim light into the space. The ghost of the hand that had gripped him around the waist and squeezed lingered, the ache of bent armor fresh as every other injury. Then he was away from himself again, hardly registering his frame sinking just that much further to lay on the floor as his recent memory replayed itself over and over again, one moment overlaying the next in near perfect clarity. He felt the sting of the calpularies behind his optics bursting and the fresh energon streaking down his dirty face as he laid there, unable to stand and curled up like a sparkling.

A new cold crept up his frame and he started to fade, unable to fight the coming emergency shutdown, he fell offline.

[lazinesswrites]

Me, taking a break from thesis writing to work on yet another Bad Batch fanfic: 😁😅

Me, realizing I will have to do not only some research into how the hell coordinates work in Star Wars, but also math: 😨😱

[lazaruspiss]

new pinned post :]

hi! I'm Ashton, but Laz and other nicknames are ok too. he/they/it are all fine by me, you can also use neopronouns if you’d like.

(If you are under 18 then do not follow me or interact with any of my NSFW posts. I understand if you happened upon one of my SFW posts and got here on accident, but this is my grown-up space, so please turn around.)

Do not interact if pro-kink or pro-fiction content offends you. You don't want to see my posts and I don't want to hear you complain!

Asks are open for just about anything, NSFW content included. Just be nice.

I take requests! art and edits mostly, although I do write as well. so if you have any ideas then you’re free to ask! I can’t promise I’ll do everything that comes my way, but I do like to try.

I also have a ko-fi, it’s not quite the same as commissions (setting those up stresses me out), but I can give you a thank you doodle or something if you donate :]

If you want to use anything I post as a prompt feel free to! Just let me know and link back to me if you post it.

I sometimes post about more serious and/or personal things on here under #ramble tag, so if you'd rather just see my silly and/or horny stuff then feel free to blacklist that.

Another tag you might want to blacklist: #laz's hater corner, which is where I bitch about things that personally bother me. The posts there shouldn't be taken too seriously, but I do get pretty mean sometimes, so be wary of that.

alright! now onto links (tumblr can be finicky about those on mobile, so I’d recommend looking at my desktop page where I have a theme and a sidebar for these)

Here's my ao3.

I can be spotted on twitter on rare occasions.

I've been trying to archive filler and fluff text from games here.

There's a page for the Batman: The Dailies comics from 1943-1946.

I also live blog as I read/watch things here!

Here’s a page of some my tags!

And if that doesn’t work, here’s art, fics, edits, videos, memes, and metas.

… And if THAT doesn’t work, I’ll go ahead and put those tags on this post as well.

[ragnarokproofing]

i wrote a big long response to a post that made me angry. it was saying that people love to complain about not being able to find new media because they aren't willing to "do the work" to go deep and find the things that they want that don't exist in the popular sphere.

i don't think that this is a particularly fair criticism because today's media landscape is incredibly difficult to navigate if you're looking for anything except for what is Within The Zeitgeist.

like, there's this book series that i love, skybound by alex london. it's a YA gritty dark fantasy series that's actively queer. it's fantastic, highly recommend. but the thing is, it's impossible to find. I got the first book at barnes & noble a year or two after it came out. after i read it, i went looking for the second book, and couldn't find it. the series disappeared from the barnes & noble shelves at some point. i looked at a local independent bookstore, well-known for its huge LGBT section - an entire room of the store. they have a big wall that's all queer YA. well, they don't have anything by alex london at all, presumably because his books aren't advertised as queer at all; they're stealth, dark, serious, and inaccessible, not something easily marketed on social media, and shelf space in these little bookstores is at a premium, because the stores are struggling to survive. these books don't have any sort of fandom or cult status, and they were never particularly popular, so they're not likely to ever end up in used bookstores. so because i already knew about them, i was able to order copies of the rest of the series - but if i didn't, i would never have stumbled across them. how would I have?

this is especially true of movies. despite living in the golden age of remasters, with old, forgotten movies finding new life through AGFA, vinegar syndrome, alamo drafthouse, etc, there are many, many wonderful movies that are still completely under the radar. but most people don't really have access to these - 4K blu-rays are expensive, and how would anyone find out about them if they're not already involved in the space? it's not like there are many video stores around anymore - and all of these streaming services are circling the drain, their catalogues scattering to the winds. shudder is great if you want horror, but movies and franchises come and go, and while they have a lot of gems their catalog isn't that big, and anyway, that's another subscription. so how the hell are people supposed to find the offbeat movies that they want?

the answer that i would give is in-person screenings, but those sure as shit aren't accessible. they're only really a thing in cities, and unless you're a college student and your school has film clubs they're probably at boutique theaters and tickets are pretty pricey, and besides, learning about screenings at the Music Box Theater means joining their mailing list, or following them on facebook or instagram, and you can't do any of those things unless you already know that they exist. if you're already passionate about film, then you know about the resources in your city, but if you're just a rando with a passing interest, you never learn about them.

i don't like this criticism because it doesn't acknowledge how fucking hard it is to find new things. people on social media who talk about not being able to find what they want aren't stupid or lazy, they literally don't know how, because nobody ever taught them. i'm lucky enough to have been able to go to free film screenings for several years in college and now i have an extensive library of hard discs that i screen myself or lend to my friends, and i have a pretty deep knowledge of the genres that i prefer - and i still have a miserable time finding anything new that i'm interested in, because that process fucking sucks, and none of this even acknowledges that a lot of media was/is actively repressed because of its controversial nature.

so, instead of bitching about how people are lazy and aren't willing to do the work because they're not as serious about art as you are, why don't you roll up your sleeves and give them actual advice, you prick.

discovering media is a skill. the way that people learn and refine skills is not by being berated. it's by being taught.

[hypnified]

slush is such a bitch, i love him and hate him at the same time. he's a pathetic wet meow meow, i want to kiss him as a treat. why is he so cruel, i want to gossip with him, i bet he's got some gossip. i wanna hear slush absolutely slander others because i bet he does. we need more slush content, he doesn't get enough love

I shouldn't be laughing at this anon, but seeing "slush is such a bitch" is so funny to me it's insane. But let's be honest he kinda is, but you didn't hear that from me! :)

I haven't really said a whole lot about slush, but I also have an ask with some slush content so there's that, I'll eventually answer that. Kiss him I dare you, he's gonna be such an ass about it too he'll complain and be cruel because it's slush. Out of all my ocs this boy right here is the king of gossip, please if you like gossip go to him or Bear, hell i have a few other ocs you could go to but that's for another post I have planned. But this boy right here has some good gossip, and honestly some of it is just rumours, but if something's going on slush knows!

He's not afraid to slander those close to him, he's good at keeping those around him grounded even though he's a bitch about it. Deep down he does care, I promise.

"don't you have other asshole ocs?" I mean yeah, I have Irais, Laz, you could even argue Skunker and Plasma but I'm not adding them here. Irais doesn't always realise that he's been an asshole, unless it's targeted at his batchmates then it's on purpose. I can't guarantee that Irais will apologise though! Laz wasn't always like this, it's mainly the walls he's put up to not only protect himself but also others. As for Slush, well he's Slush.

[2offayyo-kzt]

wwdits smol fic (energy vampire Sean)

Pretending to be a human when you are an energy vampire is not difficult, Sean had mastered this so well that playing the stupid human was a second skin for him, a breath of fresh air in his monotonous days, probably helped by the fact that he was a pathological liar.

Indeed Sean Rinaldi was a closeted energy vampire, that is to say a vampire who doesn't ostentatiously express his true nature; usually it's a known hunting technique among energetic vampires, initiating contact with a potential prey by pretending to be someone else, however for the man with the fifty-year old appearance, the real reason was quite different : loneliness.

Indeed, when you are an energetic vampire, loneliness is your only companion, you are born one day in a house (if you are lucky a mansion if not a simple residence), you live in your house and you die in it, because you depend on it and you can't afford to be away from it too long and often, at the risk of not having enough energy to drain.

The house, the home, is vital for an energy vampire, it is the source of all the evils, and it is perhaps the only thing that can put in danger, a guy of his kind.

Energy vampires are certainly the most powerful species of vampire, the only one capable of draining other vampires and then walking in the sun without ending up as roast beef, however Sean considered this a small reward for the price paid.

He was lonely, terribly lonely, it was out of desperation that he initiated a marriage with this lovely woman named Charmaine, short-tempered, and thus, an inexhaustible source to drain right under his roof (and maybe he fell madly in love with her in the meantime)

He fed exclusively on exasperation and frustration, which is what led him to initiate contact with his gothic neighbor four years ago :

"Hey Laz !" he shouted at the top of his lungs, distracting the man from his gardening task "Bitch kicked me out again, can you believe it ?"

The bearded vampire sighed with boredom and insulted the man with the cap in return, then hypnotized him, disgusted to have had his peace disturbed.

For Sean on the other hand, it was a real feast, much more nourishing than the beer in his hand, and that day, he understood that Laszlo would be his new ideal target.

Unfortunately in these calculations, he had in no way predicted to get attached to the traditional vampire, he was ready to confess his nature of energetic vampire, but when Laszlo put his arm around his neck, flirting lazily in his ear, Sean never found the courage.

And he was sure he would lose that closeness forever if he stopped his masquerade. So he got stuck in his lie, playing the stupid misogynistic human on the edges, spending his days drinking or complaining.

Every day he was desperate to initiate another contact with the vampire, to find out more about his habits "he considers me his best friend !" and this thought often brought tears to his eyes.

He had finally managed to create a strong bond with another soul, an equal relationship, each lying about their true natures but nevertheless honest with each other.

It was refreshing, him, usually hated, the world convinced that his only purpose in life is to piss off others.

It was nice to be loved, even if it's superficial, but it was enough for him.

An energetic vampire is born alone, lives alone, and dies alone, unless he is acting well.

[sirwow]

Torn Tapes; Pt 1

The wind blows softly as the start of springtime rolls in and the spruce forest buzzes with life. Grass and sticks crackle under the footsteps of 3 boys traipsing along a trail. Lazarus, Azazel and Cain chat while chewing on their own candies and Cain dragging a box.

Az: “Augh.. never liked how taffy gets stuck on my braces.”

Cain: “Then why do ya keep buying it every time we go to plums?”

Az: “Well it tastes good! Besides you eat jawbreakers and complain about your throat hurting.”

Laz: “Az that’s not how jawbreakers work..”

Az: “Throat, mouth, jaw. Same thing. Anyways, how long is that old generator supposed to work for Cain?”

Cain: “Donno.”

Az: “What do you mean you don’t know? You’re a techie!”

Cain: “I’m a mechanic not a electrician, Az.”

Az: “Like I said, same thing.”

Laz: “Well regardless we should be able to power that old tv in the treehouse with it and play some games. Besides if it’s only an hour or something I’ll just bring mine.”

Az: “Alright alright..”

The three continue through the woods with the old generator and up to a old treehouse. Trash bags of rubbish and tools surround a near cleaned treehouse. The treehouse sits with a combination of fresh planks and old untouched by rain. Cain walks behind Az and Laz with the generator but the wheels of the generator catch on something hollow in the ground and trips up Cain onto the floor.

Laz: “Woah you okay?”

Cain: “Ugh yeah.. fuckin generator got stuck on something. Sounded kinda weird too.”

Az: “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Cain: “Sounded hollow is what I mean, now shh..”

Cain goes to the dirty and dusty bump in-front of the generator and taps it with his knuckles. A wooden clicking returns and Cain stands back up with Az n Laz by his sides.

Cain: “Sounds like a box there.”

Az: “Ooh, you think it’s treasure?”

Cain: “Why don’t you find a shovel over there n figure out.”

Az: “Alright but I call dibs on whatever’s in it!”

Cain: “Hey Lazarus mind helping me get this ol thing up there while Az digs himself a hole?”

Laz: “Oh yeah, of course!”

Laz and Cain lift up the generator cord to the tree house and plug in a old box tv together. The tv beams on and sits idle with nothing inside. Along side the Tv inside the treehouse is a new small beanbag, a bookshelf filled to the brim, a rug and scattered papers of future plans and Az’s doodles.

Az: “Hereees the box!” Azazel plops down the box in the center of the rug

Cain: “That was fast.”

Az: “Well it was a lot looser then it looked. Now com’on let’s open it!”

Laz pops open the dusty box and inside sits a large book and several tapes, unnamed. The three start taking things out.

Az: “tapes and a book? What a lame treasure.”

Cain: “Oh boo hoo.“

Az: “I’ll boo hoo your face.”

Laz takes out and opens the book as Cain and Az bicker. It’s a picture book dated 6 years back. The first page immediately catches him off guard.

Laz: “Hey guys? This book has photos of our siblings.”

Az: “Wait really?”

Cain: “Huh?”

Laz lays out the book on the rug with the first picture being a fuzzy image of a younger Judas and Eve. The photo is titled with marker as “photo test” in neat hand writing.

Cain: “Well I’ll be damned. I remember eve hangin out with Judas but she never talked bout it much.”

Az: “Judas never told me anything about his friends.. something about wanting to keep it to himself.”

Laz: “I wonder who took it. Looks like most the first few are of Judas and Eve.”

Az: “Well that one’s of Magdalene.”

Cain: “It’s Maggie. But yeah that’s definitely her. Whats the other pages got.”

Laz flips the page to pictures of an in progress treehouse with a folded up blueprint in the pages.

Laz: “Guess her and whoever her friends were the ones to build this place.”

Az: “No wonder it was so shotty when we found it. A bunch of kids made it!”

Cain: “Uh-huh, we’re also kids Az.”

Az: “Teens! There’s a difference.”

Cain: “Hey. Is that Mary?”

Laz: “What?”

Cain: “Ya sister! Look!”

Cain points to the edge of a photo where a younger Bethany can be seen flying and lifting a plank up to the tree for Eve. Laz takes the book to look closer.

Laz: “..What..? But she..I..”

Laz flips quickly to the next page with Cain and Az looking over his shoulder to peek. The next few pages have multiple pictures of Beth but Laz keeps flipping until coming to a torn page with half a photo still on it. The photo obviously had Judas but Bethany’s pigtails could be seen past the tear.

Az: “Uhm.. you okay Lazarus?”

Laz: “Did you know Judas and Bethany were friends..?”

Az: “I-I thought you did..”

Laz: “No she- I was always sick in my room and she never really told me about her friends other then Maggie.. but she wouldn’t lie to me..”

Az: “mmh..”

Cain: “Well- uh- maybe if we watch these tapes we could figure some more out!”

Laz: “..Yeah. Yeah let’s do that. Besides the rest of the pages in this book look torn up, no point in trying to read torn truths, haha..”

Az: “Yeah let’s see what these old things are. What’s the first one?”

Cain: “Just called “Test”. Guess we better test it out.”

Laz: “I swear to the lord- just put the tape in you dum-dum.”

Cain and Az giggle n Cain after slides the 1st tape in to watch.

End of Pt 1

Next part will be linked once it is up