#LOSING MY MIND ABOUT IT. THIGH. THIGH SCAR????? that i have seen before and still want to know about

[st-louis]

the CHat

[miioouu]

Ghost's tattoos

This was supposed to be a sweet, wholesome little idea, but like…it’s me, what else did we expect? Also, I’m trying to fight my months long writer’s block so I'm sorry if this sucks, let me get some practice in before I tackle the Mean dbf ghost series.

Warning: suggestive, genre of reader not mentioned, lowkey condescending

Wc: 963

Everyone around the base has had a glance of the Lieutenant’s tattooed sleeve. He usually prefers to keep it covered, although most of his tattoos don't have a deep meaning behind them, or at least that’s what he says; it still felt too personal, too vulnerable to show around.

But you, you were the only person who had seen it all. Not just the tattoos, but the scars, the wounds, the scratches that all decorated his arms; and no matter how many hours you spent tracing every line on his body, you could never get enough of it, it's just so fascinating.

So surely it's no surprise to either of you (or anyone, it's not like you kept your relationship hidden), when some sergeant loses you, only to find you in Simon's office, sitting by his side as he signs whatever paperworks that have occupied his whole attention for the past couple of hours, your eyes trained on his hand, watching as the veins twist, disappear and appear again with each movement, tracing up to his wrist, a little up to the sliver of skin showing; a beauty mark here, a small raised white line of a scar there, dark ink…everywhere. The beginning of a skull tattoo peeking out his sleeve, some roman numbers that you never bothered to question its symbolism, knowing he'll say something along the lines of ‘nothing important’ or ‘don't worry about it, sweets’. You two were close, yes, but Simon and his secrets were closer, he loves to keep his privacy, his walls built strong and high, and although you managed to slither through some bricks, it wasn’t enough.

But you’re not one to dwell on this, not when people leave you alone with him, not when he groans as he stretches; his fitted black tee lifting up and exposing a glimpse of his happy trail. Your eyes would’ve strayed further south, remembering what he has hidden under those army pants, if it weren’t for his fingers grabbing your chin, making you hold his gaze for a moment before he leans in, pressing a soft kiss to your lips, “What’s going on in that pretty little head of yours, sweetheart?”

Simon was sweet to you, always, no matter what, and you loved that, you really did, but not when you’re so obviously desperate for him. Not when your thighs are rubbing together, not when your lashes are batting at him, not when you’re pouting, too frustrated to word your needs out. And he knows it. He knows you don’t want him to dote on you right now; it’s all his fault, he assumes, not having given you the attention you deserve lately.

So he did what he always does, what he knows will get the tender smile back on your face; he leaned back against his chair, it squeaked under his weight, he spread his legs, enough for you to sink to your knees between them. His thumb brushed against your bottom lip, feeling the slightly chapped skin under his finger, chuckling “Sweets, you need to stop biting those precious lips of yours, hmm?” but he doesn’t mean it, of course he doesn’t. There’s nothing hotter in his mind than your pearly whites digging in your pinkish plumpness, especially when you’re looking up at him with those fake innocent eyes, like you were doing right now.

His thumb pushed past your lips, feeling the edges of your front teeth before rubbing against the tip of your tongue. The action itself was lewd, but something about Simon’s softness made it so much more wholesome; like a kiss to the cheek, like the rubbing of noses against each other, like a caress of a hand against an arm… How does a man so big, so full of violence and tragedies be so…kind?

And you need to appreciate him, right? That’s the right thing to do; wrap your lips around his digit, your eyes fluttering shut at the taste of his skin, and you suck, softly, sweetly, as if you’re savouring the last bite of your favourite dessert; the only difference is that Simon would never deprive you have him. You pull out slowly, a pop echoing in the room, his finger glistening under the white light of his office, but you’re not done coating him with your spit, far from it. Your tongue darts out, licking a strip all the way to his wrist only to later on, then press kisses to his palm and then back up. Your eyes zero on the black ink; a thick line that slowly thins out as it curves, depicting a skull, you follow it with your hot muscle, retracing every line etched on his flesh, and you feel him stiffen under your touch, his breath hitching and he mumbles out a curse “Bloody hell, sweetheart… you’re being so good.” This man has the audacity to smile, a warm one that has your heart skip a beat, that has the knot in your stomach tighten even more, and it makes you want to slap it off his face; why is he acting like an angel when you feel your blood hotter than the flames of hell?!

You scoff, pulling away, and you know you should ask permission before guiding your hands to his belt, but come on, he can’t expect you to be proper now. Although it's your fault for taking advantage of his kindness, in a swift motion he grabs your face, squeezing your cheeks together to stop you; he knows you, you’re predictable, he slips his fingers, two this time inside your mouth again “Ah, ah, lovie. I still got so many papers to read…be a good one and suck on my fingers for now, can’t let you distract me too much…”

[reddamselette]

Kevin isn't sure when or how it started.

Or maybe he does know but refuses to acknowledge it.

There’s a number of moments swirling through his head as he thinks about it.

A jump in his heart when his hand covered Neil’s eyes in the beginning, asking for his game. Did it have to be anything other than that? Could there be a way to justify asking someone for their devotion on the court, to dedicate that devotion to him as he pours his heart and soul into the very thing that gives him life? 

The undeniable trust Neil handed over before he left to Evermore. Kevin felt like he’s been holding Neil’s life in his hands since they met. He couldn’t help but think what would’ve happened if Kevin never sought him out in Millport, if Neil heeded his warning to run yet still willing to teach him every night no matter the consequences. Would their paths cross in that other life? Would Kevin recognize Neil, not for who he was hiding, but for everything he’s seen in the other man for as long as he could remember? 

Recognize Neil by his blue eyes. His voice, his quick quips and sharp tongue, his hands and featherlight touches. The cheeky smiles and the dimples on either side of his face.

Then there’s the other thing.

The excitement bubbling in his chest as he came face to face with Andrew for the first time. The potential Kevin had seen and how he wanted to so badly utilize it as he knew inside and out Andrew is worth more than anyone could ever think.

Relief flooding his body when Andrew promised to stand between Kevin and the Moriyamas. To never be hurt, never be taken away again and live a life full of misery in Riko’s shadow.

Patting checks of injuries and late night practices when it was just the two of them like a secret only they ever had.

It’s ridiculous, really. How his mind and his body associates the smell of cigarette smoke to Andrew. The cliché of it all as Kevin compares the sunrise to hazel eyes.

Kevin thinks the irony isn’t lost on him.

How well Andrew and Neil look together like the sunlight against the blue sky or the changing colorful leaves to the fall season. The effortless way they communicate silently with matching armbands, a fire in Neil’s gaze and the slightest twitch of amusement to Andrew’s smileless lips.

Just like day and night.

We’re all born with something missing, so that we can find someone else to complete us, his mother once said so long ago. Kevin still believes it but living tends to carve out holes in everyone and it makes it easy to need more than one person.

He hopes it all goes away.

“You know, I always look for him,” Kevin says quietly, leaning forward with his elbows on his thighs and he rubs his palms together. It’s an ache in his chest he can’t seem to get rid of. A void in his stomach that never goes away—it doesn’t matter what Kevin is stressed over because it’s there. It’s always there. “Even when I pretend I don’t care, I do. I care so much, I don’t know what to do.”

He sighs and peers over his shoulder to look at Thea sitting beside him. Her leg is crossed over the other, a thoughtful expression on her face as she listens. Kevin, though, didn’t come to her for advice but a peace of mind. To get it off his chest so it doesn’t affect his game on court. He’s not entirely sure if there’s anything to say about this.

Kevin can’t let anything go into ruin. He’d rather die than let that happen because he’d lose them both. It’s never one or the other, not when he wants something that’s his and could never be taken away. The scars on his hand and the two on his cheek made sure to engrave all of that into his soul.

“Are we talking about Neil? Or Andrew?” Thea asks and Kevin looks away. His silence answers her question and she places a tentative hand on his forearm. The touch draws his eyes back to her and he wishes he didn’t. He can’t stand that look in her eye. “It’s both, isn’t it? My god, Kevin.”

“I know.”

God, does he know.

Kevin drops his face into his hands.

It is incredibly easy to need someone but the cruelty of that, in which no one ever tells you about, is how excruciating it can be to need and want someone that isn’t yours the way you want them to be.

Kevin can practice and practice and burn himself down to the embers of his soul on the court until his stupid heart can give out but he will never have what he’s wishing for. Not here in this lifetime, not in the society where remaining heterosexual is easier, not when his entire life has been faced with cameras and articles.

Not when there’s countless people watching him at every turn.

In this moment, he finds himself wishing his mother was still alive to soothe him, offer reassurance or advice on how to navigate this issue because he has to be careful and watch what he says before it crumbles before him and he’ll need to start over.

“How did this happen?” Thea asks, carefully pulling Kevin’s hands away from his face before he has the thought to start spiraling in public.

Kevin shrugs helplessly with too many circumstances pounding at the doors of his mind, to allow his heart in and take control of the wheel, to guard the goal of logic and self-destruction. “I don’t know. It was easy to pretend it was nothing, that it is nothing, but I— It has to be nothing, Thea. I can’t have it not be nothing.”

“I can’t tell you what to do, Kevin. You can vent your frustrations. You can drink until you make yourself sick. You can try and fuck your way out of this but I can’t tell you what to do. I know you didn’t come to me for help so why are you asking me to help you?”

“I wasn’t,” Kevin sighs out.

“You implied it. I won’t tell anyone, you know that. And you also know that saying this out loud makes it into a bigger problem that you will need to fix,” Thea says without missing a beat, as harsh as she can but as supportive as she could be. Kevin appreciates the lack of sugar coating, though, she could’ve told him what he wanted to hear and they’d be parting in separate directions.

Kevin can’t talk about this to anyone.

Wymack seemed to pick up on it not that long ago and speaking as a coach—Kevin had to handle it, but speaking as a newly found father—Kevin could confess and request the advice he needs.

But it’s not the same as they’re still navigating the tightrope of their relationship.

It’s something only a mother could understand.

Kevin stands abruptly, brushing off Thea’s hands trying to pull him back and he doesn’t spare her glance. He merely shakes his head and inhales deeply. “I’m aware it’s a bigger fucking problem. It would’ve been easier if it was like what I had with you.”

“Kevin,” Thea scoffs and grips his arm to spin him around and face her. She rises to her feet as well and a frown settles over her face with furrowed brows and a narrowed glare. “Don’t walk away angry. You should’ve known what it would cost you if you got too involved. It might not be like what we had but it’s all the same, isn’t it? Don’t tell me you’re that stupid.”

“Should’ve known,” Kevin echoes and waves his hand around dismissively. “It’s not easy, Thea. I wasn’t in love with you.”

His words startle them both into still and stiff stances. Thea’s lips part and Kevin’s eyes widen.

Oh.

Is that what this feeling is?

The explanation for these dreams he has of them, daydreams and fleeting thoughts of what could be and what couldn’t be. The meaning to play with what if’s and obsessively watch over Andrew or Neil or the two of them when they’re in the same room. Is to love with a traitorous heart to believe the best of them, to act as a stepping stone to their victory and have a hand in crafting their futures because he only wants what’s best for them? Is to admire with wandering eyes tracking each and every mistake they make on court to help them work through it and grind it down into nothing so no one else can ever take advantage of them where they can feel somewhat safe away from what haunts them?

Is to speak with bitten lips as he glances once, then twice, then countless times in wonder of how it’d feel to have taste them on his tongue and swallow the sounds of their voices to always know it and always remember until the end of time?

Yes, he should have known what it would cost him for becoming too involved and too attached but the Foxes weren’t like the Ravens and sometimes, when speaking to Thea, he defaults to that mindset.

Kevin could ignore it before but he could never take those words back no matter how much he prayed and begged a god that would never listen. 

“You idiot,” Thea whispers and pushes at his shoulder harshly. “You idiot.”

“Don’t. Just…don’t.”

next

[just-a-sewer-goblin]

Simon x gn!reader

Read the Modern Warfare: Ghost comics yesterday and they poked my brain in some spots. They inspired this, because yes Simon sexy; big man makes brain go brrr but what if Simon says no?

Warnings: heated make out session, not proofread and it's late so it sucks

Simon moans under you as you kiss him, the sound making your body ache with need. It echoes in your ribcage making your heart flutter and frantically beat against your ribs, trying to get to Simon.

Your bodies are pressed against each other and you already feel lightheaded when you haven't even taken your clothes off.

But Simon is shirtless and all that skin under your hands drives you insane while you're making out. Tongues lazily intertwining, rubbing together, creating that delicious friction that makes you pant.

Simons pupils are blown wide as he looks up at you on his lap. You can feel how affected he is by you as well and it increases your desire tenfold.

You think you'll go crazy if you don't get the clothes separating you two out of the way. Your entire body is calling out to the man under you and you need to do something about it before you lose your mind.

Slowly you move your hand over his pecs, dipping your head to follow that path with your lips and tongue, marking his skin while you're at it.

Simon makes a sound that's half a whimper, half a moan and it makes you bite down on his pec which in turn gets an actual whimper out of him.

You look up at him and he's thrown his head back, watching you through almost closed eyes, burning you with his desire.

His chest is heaving and his harsh pants of air are actually audible. You have never seen him so wrecked before and you can't wait to ruin him when he moans your name. And your hips twitch in response.

Th reaction only seems to fuel his desire more and he bites his lip trying to stifle the sounds he's making.

Your hand continues its path down his tummy towards his pants where your reward awaits. Your heart speeds up as you get to his waistband.

It's such a tiny moment you would have missed it if you were less aware of every single movement of Simon.

Just for a second he goes stiff and then relaxes again.

Your hand stills. Your eyes trail up from his crotch again to meet his eyes. There's a tightness around his mouth that doesn't sit well with you.

He's the picture of relaxation, but it's not real anymore. His eyes are wide open, you can see the muscles in his arms flex, even as he keeps them down, seemingly open and relaxed.

You sit back on his thighs, ceasing all other movement.

"Tell me, baby.", you gently encourage.

Simon shakily exhales, puts his hand over yours, that's still sitting just over his waistband and moves your hand back up to his chest.

You can feel his heart hammering under your palm and it doesn't feel like desire anymore. It feels like a hectic little animal being chased. It feels like anxiety and slight panic.

He stays quiet, not moving a muscle and you match him, gently stroking your thumb over his skin, scooting closer again, so you're not half bent over from where you tried to get to his zipper.

"I don't... I'm sorry, 'luv.", he whispers roughly and you smile. A sad smile but it's gentle and you can feel Simons heart slow down under your palm at your smile.

"It's okay. No need to apologize."

His other hand finds your neck and he draws you in until your foreheads touch and you can feel his shaky breath on your lips.

One of your hands mimics his, while the other one stays on his chest, his skin warm and scarred against yours.

Gently you squeeze the back of his neck. "We're okay." You whisper and you can feel him finally relax again.

You know there's so much he probably feels like saying but as he so often does he lets the silence speak for him.

Luckily you've gotten fluent in Simon's silence over the time.

"I don't care, baby. I only care about you being here with me. My needs can be taken care of in other ways. We don't need that to be close. We've got our own ways."

Instead of answering, he kisses you again and you arch your back so all of you is pressed to him.

It has nothing of the desperation of earlier even if the heat is still simmering deep in your belly.

It's all comfort and closeness now.

He cups your face, as if you're the most precious thing he's ever held and you smile into the kiss.

"How can you be so... so... good?", he asks. If you didn't know him as well as you did you would have missed the way his voice sounds slightly choked up.

"I love you.", is your simple answer and he shakes his head.

"I don't get it. Why are you not sick o' me? Why haven't ya found someone who can do normal shit."

You smile, peck his lips and try to pull back, which turns into him holding you close and deepening the kiss before you attempt to pull back again. He doesn't let you and you grin into the kiss. Finally he lets you go, both of you laughing quietly.

"I will never be sick of you. I don't need anything but you. And you are enough, exactly as you are, right now in this moment. You've always been enough."

You can see his eyes widen as your words hit him, his hands find your hips and hike you up a bit more and then he hides his face in your chest, his arms around you, chrushing you to him

If the way his fingers dig into your skin is slightly painful you don't comment on it. You bring your arms up and hold him just as tightly.

[missvelvetsstuff]

Just A Number

Bucky Barnes x Older Reader

Summary: Reader meets Bucky at a party and the attraction is more than either one of them wants to resist.

Notes: Since most stories are younger readers I felt like having a more mature reader could be a nice change of pace. Especially since I'm creeping up on senior discounts and want to believe Bucky could fall in love with someone like me.

I try to keep my readers description vague but, as always, she's female, tall and this one is obviously 40+

Last chapter.......

Y/N looked at him with lust darkened eyes "Shut up and carry me to my room, Sarge."

Buckys breath caught "Anything you want doll, is yours."

Chapter 12

Warnings: swearing, tiny angst, fluff, dirty talk

***SMUT*** 18+ ONLY

Bucky grabbed the back of her thighs and whispered in her ear "Jump"

She almost asked how high but simply smiled and complied, wrapping her legs around his waist, robe falling behind her and night shirt pushed up to her waist, until he could feel her heat leaking through her panties.

"Jamie, please..." She moaned as he stopped to hold her up against a wall and kissed down her neck to the swell of her breasts.

He mumbled into her skin "Where is your fucking room? I need to be inside you sweetheart."

Y/N pulled one of her hands out of his hair and pointed to the stairs "Stairs, right, purple door." Then returned her hand to the back of his head and pulled him up to kiss her again.

They were halfway up the stairs when she bit his bottom lip and he almost stumbled "Careful honey, don't wanna distract me and fall down the stairs."

In a breathy voice she replied "I trust you to keep me safe, Sarge."

Bucky groaned "Do you even know what you do to me doll? So perfect." *kiss* "Smart" *kiss* "and beautiful" kiss*nibble*groan "and funny" *kiss*grunt "and so goddamn sexy I've been losing my mind." *panting*

"I don't think I had so many wet dreams even when I was a teenager. I couldn't share a room with Sam for fear he would hear me. Waking up most mornings with the whisper of your touch and sticky sheets."

Y/N giggled breathily in his ear "I missed you too, Sarge."

Bucky groaned.

He finally found her door and dropped her on the bed before closing and locking it. He looked around her room as he unbuttoned his shirt "So how's the sound carry around here? I suppose sound proof rooms would be too much to ask."

She giggled and he felt his cock throb before she answered "It's not completely soundproof but we bought this when I turned 21 and the trust fund from my biological parents came to me. Michael was still a toddler.

Dawn moved into the apartment upstairs when she turned 21, so with everything we made sure it's all very well insulated. She won't hear much and if we're too much she has fancy headphones."

She smirked at him "I hope you're not too shy because you're going to hear about it in the morning, whether she can hear us or not."

"Thanks for the heads up. I'll just have to make this night worth whatever she can come up with." Bucky kissed her hard before ripping off what little clothing she had and then stripping the rest of his clothes off.

When he was done he stood back to look at her, laid out on her bed like the most decadent dessert he had ever seen, and blushed at how she was checking him out right back.

After a moment she started feeling self conscious and moved to cover her body's evidence of child bearing.

Bucky growled "Don't do that doll, I want to see you."

She shivered as she looked down "You don't need to see my c section scar and stretch marks."

He shook his head "I want all of you, even the scars and imperfections. Don't hide from me. I have some nasty scars myself, you know."

"Yeah but yours are from combat, not taking a stubborn baby out or your skin stretching over the fat from two pregnancies that never quite goes away.

Fighting scars are sexy, definitely not the same."

"Let me show you baby."

He crawled up the bed, stopping to kiss and caress on his way up. He took a quick taste of her dripping heat and groaned at her sweetness. Before she could get too into it he moved up to kiss and nibble at her c section scar. He kissed and traced every one of the stretch marks on her hips, stomach and breasts.

"So beautiful" he whispered in awe of her beauty and willingness to share it with him. Thankful that Sharon hadn't ruined the best thing he ever had.

When he was up to her face he kissed her hard, trying to pour all his love for her into it. The love that scared him and seemed too soon but he didn't care anymore and couldn't think of anywhere he'd rather be than with her.

While they kissed he slowly slid into her drenched heat, the squelching sound just making him harder and needier.

"Goddamn doll, you feel so fucking good. So tight and dripping wet, I don't ever want to leave your sweet pussy." Bucky was rambling into her ear as he thrust into her, already gone for the feelings he had given up on controlling. The more he fucked into her the more that was chipped away at his restraint, the less he could hold back so deep into the moment and how she felt around him.

He sped up until he was slamming into her, hitting her spot every time he thrust into her, encouraged by her moans and whines, trying to become part of her, until he felt his orgasm creeping up and slowed back down. He reached down to rub her clit and groaned when he felt her tighten around him.

"Fuck, Y/N, I can feel you're getting close. I need you to cum for me sweetheart." He grunted, trying to hold his finish back until she came but it was getting to be impossible "Oh god honey, I can't hold back. C'mon baby, give it to me." He sped up "Yesyes, shitshit s'good baby."

Y/N was lost in the moment, in him and the feelings he brought, physical and emotional. She felt her orgasm rushing up on her and was too overwhelmed to do anything but shudder and groan and whine, "Jamie, please".

She felt him swelling inside her, becoming impossibly harder, before he painted her walls with his cum.

As he panted in her ear she couldn't stop the sob from escaping her mouth, her eyes filling with tears. She tried to speak but couldn't. She clawed at his back, needing him closer.

Bucky pulled back to look at her but she turned her head in an attempt to hide the tears from him.

"Y/N? Are you ok? Did I hurt you? Talk to me honey, please." He looked at her anxiously, afraid he had done something wrong.

After a few minutes she was able to stop the crying and looked at him embarrassed "I'm sorry, tonight has been very intense and I get emotional because, hormones." She smiled softly at him "You didn't do anything wrong, you were perfect and I'm....." She mumbled the rest so he didn't understand.

He wiped the tears off of her face, hoping she wouldn't notice his eyes were watery as well.

"You're what doll? You can tell me anything."

She shook her head "No, I don't want to scare you off. It's too soon."

"Too soon for what? I don't think there's anything you could do to scare me off. Just tell me." He coaxed.

Her face heated up and she was grateful for the darkness "I'm falling in love with you." She whispered so softly he almost couldn't hear. Almost.

Bucky smiled and kissed her all over her face then nuzzled in her neck before nibbling on her ear

"I'm in love with you too, Y/N. And I'm not going anywhere."

He got up to get a wet towel and clean them both up before he kissed her slow and deep, laying on his side and pulling her into him.

They both fell asleep quickly, sated and content.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N was disturbed by knocking on her bedroom door and grumbled "Go'way, sleepin'.

The person on the other side of the door knocked harder "It's after noon, you bum. It's Sunday, you're late for brunch and the kids are coming tonite." Dawn kept knocking.

"Fine dammit, I'm up. Go'way."

Dawn laughed "Tell your soldier you have to eat to keep your strength up or you'll be a dead lay."

Y/N grumbled and tried to wake Bucky "James." She gently rubbed his right arm "Jamie. Time to get up."

Bucky grunted, rolled to his side and pulled her closer "Mmmm, five more minutes doll."

She shook him "No Jamie. It's time for food, you heard her."

He groaned again "Three more minutes?"

She shook him harder "No Jamie, now. You don't understand, she will come in here if we aren't up soon."

"I'm not afraid of your tiny sister."

Y/N chuckled "You should be. Don't let her size fool you. Besides I smell coffee and bacon. I'm hungry, dammit!"

She tried to crawl over him but he grabbed her and pulled her close with a smirk on his face "Yeah? Me too."

She kissed him hard, licked the tip of his nose then jumped out of bed while he was distracted wiping his nose off "Later sarge, a girls gotta eat."

Bucky grinned "I'll give you something-"

Dawn knocked again "At the table in two minutes or I'm coming in there."

Y/N stuck her tongue out at him and threw on some sweats and a t-shirt. "Don't worry, we have plenty of time to fool around but I'm about to pass out from hunger."

"Fine" Bucky relented "but I'm having dessert after brunch."

As they went to get up they could hear the doorbell and the dogs barking. Y/N gave him a kiss before they headed for the front door to see who was there.

@supraveng @cjand10 @440mxs-wife @kandis-mom @dtba-grey81 @calwitch @ozwriterchick

Chapter 13

[moonshine999]

The Crows as Taylor Swift albums (pt.2)

because I’m awake, slowly losing sanity, and have nothing better to do <3

Nina Zenik : Lover

💋 “I know that I'm a handful, baby, uh // I know I never think before I jump” - ME! 

💋 “I'm so sick of running as fast as I can // Wondering if I'd get there quicker // If I was a man” - The Man 

💋”Hey, it's all me, in my head // I'm the one who burned us down // But it's not what I meant // I'm sorry that I hurt you” - Afterglow

💋 “Tell me that you're still mine // Tell me that we'll be just fine //Even when I lose my mind” - Afterglow 

💋 “Killing me slow, out the window // I'm always waiting for you to be waiting below // Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes // What doesn't kill me makes me want you more” - Cruel Summer

💋”And I screamed for whatever it's worth // “I love you" ain't that the worst thing you ever heard” - Cruel Summer 

💋”But we might just get away with it // Religion's in your lips // Even if it's a false god // We'd still worship // We might just get away with it // The altar is my hips // Even if it's a false god // We'd still worship this love” - False God 

💋”They say home is where the heart is // But that's not where mine lives” - London Boy 

💋”Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh // We can follow the sparks, I'Il drive” - I Think He Knows 

💋 “My team is losing, battered and bruising // I see the high fives between the bad guys // Leave with my head hung, you are the only one // Who seems to care” - Ms. Americana and the Heartbreak Prince 

💋”Maybe you ran with the wolves and refused to settle down // Maybe I've stormed out of every single room in this town” - Daylight 

💋”But if the story's over // Why am I still writing pages?” - Death By A Thousand Cuts

💋 “Our country, guess it was a lawless land // Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand // Paper cut stings from our paper thin plans”- Death By A Thousand Cuts 

💋 “All the king's horses, all the king's men // Couldn't put me together again // Cause all of my enemies started out friends // Help me hold onto you” - The Archer 

💋”Cat and mouse for a month or two or three // Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe” - Paper Rings 

Matthias Helvar : Folklore

🪞 “You're not my homeland anymore // So what am I defending now? // You were my town // Now I'm in exile, seein' you out I think I've seen this film before” - exile 

🪞 “ And they said // "There goes the last great American dynasty" //“Who knows if she never showed up, what could've been" “ - the last great American dynasty

🪞 “‘Cause you weren't mine to lose // You weren't mine to lose, no”- august

🪞 “With you, serve // With you, I fall down, down // Watch you breathe in // Watch you breathing out, out” - epiphany

🪞 “Only 20 minutes to Sleep // But you dream of some epiphany // Just one single glimpse of relief // To make some sense of what you've seen” - epiphany 

🪞 “Keep your helmet, keep your life, son // Just a flesh wound, // here's your rifle “ - epiphany

🪞 “You drew stars around my scars // But now I'm bleedin'” - cardigan 

🪞 “But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss // I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs // The smell of smoke would hang around this long // ‘Cause I knew everything when I was young // I knew I'd curse you for the longest time” - cardigan

🪞 “Time, curious time // Gave me no compasses, gave me no signs // Were there clues I didn't see? // And isn't it just so pretty to think // All along there was some // Invisible string // Tying you to me?” - invisible string 

🪞 “And that's the thing about illicit affairs // And clandestine meetings and longing stares // It's born from just one single glance // But it dies, and it dies, and it dies // A million little times “ - illicit affairs 

🪞”Look at this idiotic fool that you made me // You taught me a secret language // I can't speak with anyone else” - illicit affairs 

🪞 “All these people think love's for show // But I would die for you in secret // The devil's in the details, but you got a friend in me // Would it be enough if I could never give you peace?” - peace

🪞” I didn't have it in myself to go with grace //And you're the hero flying around, saving face //And if I'm dead to you, why are you at the wake? // Cursing my name, wishing I stayed //  Look at how my tears ricochet “ - my tears ricochet 

🪞”And I can go anywhere I want // Anywhere I want, just not home” - my tears ricochet

🪞 “Stood on the cliffside // Screaming, "Give me a reason" // Your faithless love's the only hoax// I believe in // Don't want no other shade of blue // But you // No other sadness in the world would do” - hoax 

🪞 “ I want auroras and sad prose // I want to watch wisteria grow right over my bare feet // ‘Cause I haven't moved in years // And I want you right here // A red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground “ - the lakes 

(Kaz, Inej, Jesper and Wylan are already posted)

[chellestrash]

okay okay fuck you’ve told me about camboy!frank and now i literally CANNOT get the sight of it out of my head fuck

like the idea of you just schooling through the websites until you stumble across him and once you click open the stream, he’s sitting there on the couch with his thighs spread open. they’re thick and you can see a few scars on his hip. the angle shows his mouth down, and you can see the bit of stubble lining his jaw. his hand is wrapped around his cock and he’s slowly touching himself, thumb rubbing over his head when he sees your donation come in GAAAAAAH

michelle i literally am losing my fucking mind at this i can’t i can’t we have GOT to talk about this more fuck

Oh well you‘re welcomeeee!

FRANK CASTLE SMUT BELOW

YEP! Okay yeah exactly, i see it like that you just stumble across his livestream one day, you watch him toch himself for a bit, notice his pretty thighs his big hands his cock, you check the username, “the big bad punisher”, is it a bit weird, yeah but you don’t mind. (Maybe in this scenario frank doesn’t kill people as a hobby.) You enjoy what you see but it’s nothing you havent seen before you know? So after a bit, you decide to leave the livestream. But before you do, you get to hear it, you see the donation come in with a little message, you hear his raspy chuckle and then his voice as he reads the message a deep “Thank you for that sweetheart.” at the end and you feel your your stomach do a fucking backflip. You never closed a tab on your computer faster before. You shut your laptop and sit there in silence, eyes wide as his voice, the words replay in your head over and over again. You try to just not think about it and focus on other things as days go by but it’s just impossible. You can’t get his voice out of your head, you can’t help it, you want to hear him again.

So, after sitting in front of your computer for good 15 minutes you pull the site up and log into your account, you scroll for s bit and just as you’re about to just search his username up you recognize the frame in one of the livestreams. You join quickly and shove your headphones in. It’s a good moment, you can tell he’s getting close now, the little grunts and means only add onto your need to hear his voice again. So as you watch his hand work over his cock, watch his body tensing us slowly his chest starting to move faster and faster, you quickly grab your card, typing the details in as fast as you possibly can. You add a little message, something you piece together as you try to focus on something that’s not his cock on the screen of your computer. You hear the alert go off as your message show up on the screen and you almost whine out loud at the sound of his voice.

“This should be more but I need to get dinner still.”

He read the message and scoffs loudly, his hand pausing for a moment as his laugh rings in your ears.

“Shit, thank you sweetheart, dont want you spending money on me and then going hungry.”

He squeezes his cock before he begins to move his hand again and you feel almost embarrassed for how hard you reacted to that.

“You get yourself something good after, yeah?”

You feel your blood rush between your legs as he continues to talk. Some of the words get cut off by the grunts but you really don’t fucking mind.

“Come back tomorrow, tell me if you liked it.”

He mumbles under his breath as the precum starts to drip down his cock. You can’t tell if he means the food still or is he asking you to let him know if you like to watch him like this but nod, you nod at the screen quickly realizing what yiu just did but you really don’t care at the moment. You push your hand under the waistband in your pants before slipping it into your underwear. You touch yourself, quickly getting close and his voice, reading another donation, pushes you over the edge. You shut your laptop the second you realize what you did but you know, you know you’ll log back tomorrow.

…well that’s about it for the backstory c:

but I have more ideaaaas

I also, I KNOW I saw a post about Camboy!frank on here a while ago and I looked for it but I can’t fucking find it, anyway… yeah that’s just what’s been on my mind lately

[shaisuki]

❝ DEVOURING FEELINGS. ❞

𓅓 FEATURING. BULLY! ITOSHI RIN

CONTENT WARNINGS. bully rin + bullying + rejection + brief noncon + body hate + self-loathing + mentions of failed diets + pinning.

REQUEST. would you consider writing something for bully!rin? im down bad for this concept, like just imagining him being blunt and mean to reader about her physique after she confess to him, him being a total jerk saying things like he wont date such slacker who can’t even take care of themselves etc. but in fact he’s down bad for her and her body especially….

SYNOPSIS. can his words match what he just wants to do with you?

sequel.

“do you really think i would date someone like you?”

his eyes bore into yours while scanning you from head to toe and you wished the ground would open and swallow you but it didn't. his words continuing to break you like glass. your confidence turning into shards while it dropped in the concrete ground.

“i'm sure you understand the gap between us and why would i want to be seen with you by my side? for an athlete like me to date such a slacker like you who can't even take care of themselves. it would be an embarrassment.”

that was the last words he said to you before you turned away . giving him a curt nod while biting the inside of your cheek to keep your tears at bay. hell no, you would cry in front of him. you won't give him the satisfaction of that. with the remaining dignity you have for yourself, you left him.

your steps heavy as you drag away your feet to your home. so much for confessing to a guy like rin. you want to slap whoever possessed you to push your luck with rin but it had already been done and there's no use of crying for someone who was clearly ashamed to be with you.

despite sucking up for the overwhelming emotions you were feelings. you wept in the confines of your room. the tears keep pouring as his words replayed in your mind. you couldn't hate yourself more from what you are right now. it would always be your weight. no matter how many diets or depriving yourself of food, it would not let you give the chance to lose the extra weight like you were meant to keep your body forever.

it was stupid to confess to rin. while you bawled your eyes out. realizations were made. you think rin would reciprocate his feelings to you when girls who have much thinner waist and thigh gaps had confessed their feelings to him, not one had been successful though but that guy still receives mountain of gifts every year.

why must you be so attracted to guys that is an asshole.

in rin's situation it's messed up.

deep inside him takes pleasure of watching you crumble. for a guy like rin to take interest in someone you sure took it. while others were vying for his attention, in your little ways you made him feel better about himself. he would give you credits for keeping yourself calm from his rejection and his words that left you scarred for life and rin took pleasure from that. seeing it as a way for you to be his. no matter how twisted and sick he is. he will do it.

you were being difficult.

it has been months since you confessed to him and you avoided him like plague.

you would walk in the opposite direction when you spotted him, pretends you have to run some errand when you talked to people when you see him and worse, acting like he don't exist. you were being a annoyance to him at this point, two can play at this game. ignore him for all you want and you would be back with him. rin wouldn't give up for that.

group activities wasn't your cup of tea, let alone being paired with a random classmate who could be a blessing or a curse but you can bear it as long they're tolerable and you hoped you would be paired with someone decent.

forget about decent, you would rather be paired with a lazy classmate than rin. his name came in a shock when you get paired him and you can feel your luck running out. you didn't dare look where he is seated.

despite his bored look, his teal eyes glints with triumph watching you as you slumped in your seat and luck was favoring him. you would sure taste what it feels like to be ignoring him.

it was never meant to be this way for him. longing for the affection of someone who is way out of his league but like any other rin was willing to bend the rules. it's screwed up to want you after he just insulted your whole being and here is, like a lovesick fool.

he didn't mean anything what he said to you. what his words meant contradicts what he really felt for.

there's nothing wrong or undesirable to you. to him, you were perfect. movie nights were filled the thought of you. no matter how the actors screamed in those slasher movies he binged. your voice would somehow made it to his mind. filling the missing spots of his whole being.

your body, fuck. he would gladly please you with his. make you moan and hear the sweetest cries that you can make from him. crush his head with your soft, creamy thighs. lick every expanse of your body and worship every stretch marks he can feel and see. kiss your lips until they're swollen. he almost curses you out from this.

you didn't know how many times he lost concentration when you walk on by at the courtyard. nobody knows about that. he's that good at hiding his feelings towards you and silly you, didn't know how badly affect him.

fingers sink to the flesh of your cheeks. eyes wide and you couldn't even speak a word. how helpless you look under him and rin leans down into you. shivering at the words he whispered.

rin could just devour you whole.

[profound-imagination]

Dear Azriel - Part 3

A/N - some slight talk of injury etc but no other trigger warnings I don't think! I can't get over how many of you are loving this story!!❤️

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Your head fell back and found its place between the Shadowsinger's shoulder and jaw as Azriel gently and carefully cleaned your wounds. You cast your eyes down to where the wolves claws had slashed your skin and saw that someone had stitched the skin back together, the first two slashes were uneven and sloppy, the remaining were neat and clean "Sorry about the stitches, I tried my best but you were losing so much blood and I didn't want to call Rhys incase he sent you away again and I was panicking, so my mother took over after seeing the mess I made of the first two" your heart warmed "You were panicking? The Great Spymaster of the night Court, the Angel of Death, panicking? Sounds unlikely" he nudged you gently "Don't tease, I nearly lost my mind when Lucien came through those trees with you in his arms."

Feeling brave you stretched your neck up and lightly placed a kiss on his jaw "Thank you for looking after me, Az, you're the best nurse a girl could ask for" he rolled his eyes at you and then frowned "What's wrong?" His eyes met yours, big and sad "They'll scar, especially the first two I messed up" he murmured as he ghosted his fingers over them. Unsure of what had come over you, you twisted from your position, the movement pulling on your stitches and turned so you were facing him, your legs over his "It doesn't matter Az, I already have the one from the war, besides, it means I'll have battle scars, just like you" you beamed up at him as your fingers ran over some of the scars on his chest. You'd never seen him like this, so soft, he ran his fingers through your hair to tame some of the tangles and then he proceeded to wash it, you sat still as a statue in his lap, just watching his beautiful face as he did this for you, careful not to get any of the soap in your wounds.

The two of you sat there when he was done, just staring at one another, you broke the silence with a question "What are you thinking about, Az?" He took a deep breath before he spoke "I'm thinking about how the mother can be so cruel, making you human and me Illyrian, I'm thinking about how I couldn't breathe while I brought you here, I'm thinking it was selfish of me to bring you here rather than to Feyre to heal you, I'm thinking of that kiss on Starfall, how it was all I'd been thinking about since we met and then you were in my arms and kissing me and by the time my brain caught up with what was happening and I kissed you back, it was over and I'm thinking that if I could do what I wanted to do to you right now we'd rip your stitches and you'd get hurt again." blush was crawling up your neck again at his words and something in you, maybe your self-control, snapped as you threw your arms around his neck and pulled yourself as close to him as you could as your lips met his.

When he'd lifted you with him out of the bath you didn't know, your brain caught up when you felt the bed underneath you and the littlest amount of his weight on top of you, the rest he was supporting with his forearms on either side of your head and you were all to aware of his length pressed against your thigh and his shadows crawling up your legs. His kisses were dizzying, addicting and you never wanted to stop kissing him. You were about ready to beg him to touch you when he stopped in his tracks and pulled his lips from yours and you let out a small whine of complaint when he stood "We have company." Was all he said as he walked naked and glorious to the airmorie in the corner of the room, his room, you'd been unconscious in his bed for three days. You watched as he dressed himself with a slight pout on your lips.

"Please don't look at me like that Princess" Princess, your toes nearly curled at the nickname, he took your hands and pulled you to your feet, it was then you realised he was redressing your wounds, he kissed you quickly when he completed his task and said "I'll meet you downstairs when your dressed" and left you alone to do just that. Your brain caught up with you again, guests, he said there were guests.

Azriel's mother appeared in your doorway 10 minutes later just as you were struggling into a pair of soft leggings you had found on the chair next to the bed "Would you like some help?" She asked gently and you nodded at her, once she'd helped you into the leggings she walked over to Azriel's armoire and held out two jumpers to you, a cream and a black one "Choose one, Rhysand is downstairs and thinks he's gonna convince my son to send you away again so let's send you down there in one of his jumpers, just to prove a little point" the two of you shared a small smile as you pointed at the cream, you couldn't picture Az wearing a cream jumper but the idea of it made you smile. It was massive on you and hung off one shoulder, you could've worn it as a dress and the two of you shared a giggle at the big holes in the back ready for wings you didn't have.

"I love that boy but he can be blind sometimes, he loves my son, I know that, but maybe you are the best thing for him" she told you quietly as she handed you a pair of cosy socks to put on.

"Am I really the best thing for him though?" You asked "I won't live nearly as long as he will, I'll grow old and grey and he'll still look like him, I'll die." She sat you down at the desk in the corner of the room and stood behind you, taking your wet hair in her hands "My son hides behind his shadows, hides behind the armour his built for himself, he'll lead legions into war, throw himself into danger without Rhys having to ask him, but he needs you, to him your like spring after a long winter, he needs to come back from his tasks and his jobs to goodness, my son's job is a terrible one and he needs the goodness in you to keep him anchored so he doesn't lose himself in it. He'd rather love you and lose you to old age than not have you at all." Tears welled in your eyes "I don't want to hurt him in the long run" she gently placed a hand on your shoulder "You won't and the High Lord downstairs might be like another son to me but I won't allow you to be sent away again if you want to stay, you are always welcome in my home." It was then you had noticed she'd done two braids down each side of your head. "I always wanted a daughter" your heart warmed as you smiled up at her.

You quietly followed her downstairs and stopped on the bottom step next to her as she sighed while you took in the shadows pouring out of the dining room. It was going well then, Feyre appeared through the shadows and gave you a small smile, protective hand on her stomach, pregnant, she was pregnant. "Az told us what happened, are you okay?" You gave her a tight lipped smile and said "Yes, I'm okay, thanks to Lucien, Azriel and his mother." She really did look sorry but you were still mad that she and her mate were allowed to be happy, together, that they were starting a family and no one had told you and they wouldn't even give you and Azriel a chance to try, his mother squeezed your hand and led you into the dining room. Rhys and Azriel both cocked an eyebrow when they took in your appearance, shadows racing towards you as if you were their home, it was almost comical how similar they looked even if they were looking at you for different reasons "Dinner is almost ready, will you and Feyre be joining us Rhysand?" Azriel's mother asked from beside you, shadows flared again, Az wanted his brother out of here, and soon but he would never kick him out, he was his High Lord after all, before he could answer the door burst open and heavy footsteps came towards the dining room "Y/N! You're alive!" Cassian. The giant illyrian took you in his arms and span you round and Az looked like he was about to explode "I think it's best you put me down" you whispered to Cass who did as you suggested and smirked at his brother, he then turned to Azriel's mother "Hi Mama" he smiled as he wrapped her in his arms, Nesta smiling gently at him from the doorway of the dining room.

The seven of you sat down to the most uncomfortable meal you'd ever experienced. Azriel sending defiant looks at Rhys, Feyre sending sorry ones at you, how could no one tell you she was pregnant, Cassian was being Cassian, Nesta slightly amused by the whole situation and no one had spoken in 17 minutes, you knew that because you'd counted them in your head "So Nes, where's Elain?" You attempted to break the silence and thought Nesta was your best shot after the two of you had formed an unlikely alliance over smutty books "She's with Lucien, they are getting to know one another'' you smiled at the oldest sister, knowing her feelings for the red head "He's a good one Nes, I promise" she nodded at you but you could tell she didn't agree "What about Emerie and Gywn? How are they?" She smiled now, thinking of her chosen sisters "Good, Emerie and Mor are getting closer and we had to talk Gywn out of walking to the human lands to see you with a bag full of books." Your heart warmed and cracked at the same time, you loved the three Valkyrie's and you couldn't help but smile at the idea of Gywn turning up at your door with a bag full of books, a shadow curled round your wrist like a bracelet.

It was then that Cassian spoke up through a mouth full of mash potatoes "Don't grin like that, when we stopped her she hit me with the bag of books, I had a black eye for days and that was after she'd hit Az upside the head with them" Nesta looked at you and you back at her as the two of you burst out in fits of giggles.

Where Az, Rhys and Cass had gone after dinner you weren't sure but you were sure Cassian had gone to play referee. Nesta sat beside you in the small cosy drawing room, both of you watching the flames dance in the fire place when she said "I think I can do it" you looked at her "Do what Nes?" She met your eyes and said "I think I can make you Fae, if I use the trove" she said it so quietly you almost didn't hear her. The trove, the one that had almost killed her, the one that made her almost as feared as Azriel, Lady Death. "I can't ask you to do that Nes, it's too dangerous, it nearly killed you last time" she shook her head "You deserve to be with him and if can do it I will, let me do more research?" You nodded "Nes?" She looked at you "Don't mention it to Az, don't get his hopes up." She nodded in agreement.

You weren't sure when Nesta had become more of a friend to you than Feyre but it had happened, the youngest of the sisters was completely taken by her new life, her new role as High Lady and her Mate. It was like she wanted no reminders of her old life, any ties to the human realm, it was then you realised she was pregnant when they sent you away, she didn't even tell you. Didn't want you to know. You were pulled from your thoughts when you ventured into the grounds of the estate and saw the three Illyrians in some kind of stand off and headed towards them, sick of the rift you'd caused between the brothers. "She's not going anywhere Rhys!" Azriel was losing his temper, Cassian looked nervous and Rhys was stood arms across his chest, cocky as always, you quietly took your place next to Cass, the only one who had noticed your arrival, deciding it was safer than standing next to Azriel in case he or Rhys lunged for the other. The High Lord went to speak when you cut in before he could "What is your problem with me Rhys? I thought we were friends? Feyre's pregnant and no one told me, she didn't tell me, was that you as well?" His Violet eyes shot to you at the same time as Azriel's shadows wrapped around your back, ready to protect if they needed too. "I don't have a problem with you, Y/N, not at all, I have a problem with this relationship" the Shadowsinger's jaw clenched at his words "Why?" Your tone demanding "You're human" was all he said in way of an explanation "So was Feyre" you shot back "So I know that's not the case, have I just not proved myself like she did? Am I not good enough for your brother? Or are the rules just different for you, my Lord?" Cassian took a step closer to you, you were pushing Rhysands temper and you all knew it.

Rhys didn't answer you, just stood and glared "Fine" you turned to head back to the house "She stays Rhys, or I'm done, you'll never see me again" you span to look at Azriel, Cassian's eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head at his brother. Rhys' eyes snapped to Azriel as you spoke again "Az, you don't mean that, you can't mean that" the way his shadows were dancing round him like a storm told you that he very much meant what he'd said "She's mine Rhys." He didn't wait for Rhys to respond as he pulled you to him and shot into the air.

You arms were wrapped so tightly around his neck you wondered if you were strangling him as he glided through the air away from the estate and his family, into the mountains, he didn't speak to you, he just flew. You weren't sure how long you'd been in the air, head on his shoulder enjoying the closeness but it shocked both of you when Azriel let out a roar that was almost a scream and your eyes snapped open, the first thing you saw was blood running down his left wing and then you saw the arrow protruding through it and your breath caught in your throat, he tried to hard not to flinch as two more arrows hit him no matter how much he tried to avoid them, by the time the 4th found its mark the two of you were falling, Azriel never once lost his grip on you as the trees from the forest below were approaching you fast, he roared again as he flipped the two of you so it was his back that took the impact of the trees and the ground, not you and you clinged to him as you hit the ground and skidded to a stop, his wings shredded to bits and you cringed at the sight of them. Please don't be dead, please don't be dead.

You wiggled your toes in your boots that you had shoved on before heading into the garden and they moved and responded as you wanted them too, okay so nothing serious was broken and you peeled yourself off the injured Illyrian and stood, it was darker in the forest than it had been while you were flying, the trees blocking out the starlight. "Well boys, looks like we bought down the Shadowsinger" a voice spoke from the dark as terror ran down your spine, your eyes adjusted to the darkness as a group of Illyrians appeared through the trees, Azriel still on the ground, no strength to help you, you unsheathed Truth Teller from his thigh and mirrored the stance that you'd seen him make many times before without taking your eyes of the group in front of you, these must be the rebels, the ones who fought against Rhysand's rule and the leader laughed at you "Don't try and pretend you know what to do with that girl" Fucked, the two of you were absolutely fucked, that was your last thought before something hit the side of your head and you crumbled next to Azriel on the floor.

When you awoke you were in a camp, you barely had time to register what was going on when someone spoke "What are you to him?" They had Truth Teller in their hands and pointed it from your throat to Azriel who was in chains hanging between two trees in front you, alive, awake but weak, relief flooded through you as his eyes met yours but it vanished quickly when you saw the terror in them "I'm no one" you lied "Just a human who wondered too far, I was being returned to the human lands with a warning from the High Lord" they seemed to contemplate your answer as they walked over to Azriel who met their eyes, the terror in his gone and defiance filled them, you flinched as they dragged the blade down his chest "See, your reaction tells me that isn't the case."

Anger started to fill you and your veins felt like they were on fire, who did these Illyrians think they were, Azriel was one of the strongest of them all, and they stood there and laughed as their leader was carving him up, you stood on shaky legs, they hadn't thought to put you in chains, you were human, you weren't a threat "Don't. Touch. Him" voice mimicking the tone you'd heard Azriel use maybe twice in your presence, they laughed at you, laughed and much like the day before something in you snapped and a white hot light shot out of your palms and chest.

When your vision came back to you the Illyrian was gone, his boots were all that was left of him and Azriel's eyes were wide with shock. "Impossible" one of the others murmured, you took a step towards them, they took a step back, you let the unknown power in your veins run free as you took them out one by one as they tried to flee. Exhausted, you were exhausted as you turned back to Azriel and ran to him "Az, Az, how do I get you down?" His head nodded towards where they'd anchored the chains, you could see he was exhausted too, his wings still shredded, the arrows still in them, he had bruises on his face and all over his body, they'd beaten him while you'd been unconscious, anger flooded you again as you took the chain in your hands and it disintegrated into nothing, his knees hit the ground so hard you cringed and you caught him as he started to slump forward.

You were starting to panic when he croaked one word at you "Cabin" your eyes looked around desperately to see what he was talking about and there it was, what you assumed was the leaders cabin, you had to get him into the cabin "Okay, Az, I need you to help me, just a little bit okay?" You told him as you tried to pull him to his feet so you could swing one of his arms around your shoulder, he complied, using what you were sure was the last of his strength to get to the cabin.

Thankfully the fire was roaring when you stumbled in, Azriel fell to the ground again, closing the door behind you to keep out the cold of the mountains, you took in the damage on his body, not only were his wings shredded, so was his back, anger settled in you again as you realise this wasn't damage from your crash landing, they'd done this to him, they'd flogged him. "What do I do, what do I do first Az? Your back? Your wings? Your chest?" He was barely holding onto consciousness as he said "Wings. Break the arrows. Take them out." And then he passed out, you supposed that was a good thing, you couldn't imagine the pain the arrows were causing him, without you having to break them and pull them out of the leathery skin. Rhysand!! Rhys its Az! Help me! You screamed in your mind as you dropped the shields he'd taught you to have, hoping to gods he could hear you, you weren't entirely sure how it worked.

You marched back out to the camp and grabbed Truth Teller from the floor, you needed to cut the arrows rather than snap them, you weren't sure how much damage that would cause, running back into the cabin you almost slammed into Rhys' back as he looked down at his brother "You came" you breathed out, he looked over his shoulder at you "You called" you and Rhys worked silently as you worked to remove the arrows, you had tried to do it under his guidance but your hands were shaking and tears were welling in your eyes at the sight of the warrior in front of you so he took over while you worked on cleaning the wounds on his back and wrapping them in gauze. When the two of you had patched him up as best as you could, Rhys carried him to the bedroom and placed his brother on his front in the bed and motioned for you to follow him.

"What happened?" He spoke through gritted teeth. So you told him. Told him everything that had happened since Azriel had taken off with you the night before. "Impossible" he murmured when you finished retelling the part about the power you had unleashed for the the sixth time even after letting him see it all in your mind. "That's what one of them said" you told him "It appears you aren't as human as we thought" he mused "The power you described is a power from a long lost court, one we thought was long gone, Dusk" you just stared at him "I'll do some research" he said as he stood "In the meantime, I think the two of you should stay somewhere safe, he's not going to forgive himself for this, and he's not ready to see me yet, come" you followed him back into the bedroom where he again, picked up the Shadowsinger as if he weighed nothing and offered you his elbow and Winnowed you to his cabin "Stay here for as long as you need, the cabin will look after you and it's warded against anyone who's not family" he placed Az down gently again, smiled at you and left.

You dragged a chair into the bedroom and sat next to Azriel for hours, hoping that he'd regain consciousness sooner rather than later, you were absentmindedly ghosting a finger up and down the curve of his wing book in your other hand when he started to stir "Feels nice" were the first words he spoke to you, he turned his head to look at you and when your eyes met your chest tightened and for the third time in two days, something in you snapped.

[therenlover]

One Last Night In Madripoor (An 18+ Helmut Zemo/Reader Oneshot)

Synopsis: Baron Helmut Zemo is a lonely, wanted man looking for some fun, you’re a piss-poor bounty hunter in search of a connection before leaving your life of crime behind, and fate has brought you together at a party the likes of which has never been seen before. You only have one night left in Madripoor, so why not take a chance?

Tags: Smut, SoftDom!Zemo, Hook Up, Semi-Public Sex, Drinking, Safe Sex, Explicit Consent, First Meeting, Wall Sex, Blow Jobs, Cunnilingus

Rating: 18+

Warnings: Swearing, Explicit Sexual Content

Word Count: 4200~

This fic has been crossposted under the same title to my AO3!

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Madripoor was a place like nothing you had ever seen.

It wasn’t that the sights were anything special. You could find seedy criminal underbellies lined with neon where the streets ran red with blood anywhere if you looked hard enough. Even the ocean view didn’t do much to set it apart from any other place visually. No, Madripoor’s scenery and architecture weren’t what kept your eyes wide with wonder whenever you found yourself wandering through the winding back-alleys without a purpose. It was the people that kept you around.

Thieves, pirates, and miscreants had been taking shelter at the docks since before anyone there could remember. It was a city borne of the underbelly of society, the people nobody sees, but you saw them. You saw them every day when you stood in the main market waiting for an easy bounty. There were faces everywhere; big and small, tall and short, scarred and flawless. No two people in the streets of Madripoor were ever exactly alike. If you needed to remember someone, their unique face was right there waiting in your mind.

After living on the island for almost 6 months, most people were already cataloged neatly in your mind as friend or foe. This man, though, he was new. He was different.

The night was still young. There was some trouble at the Princess Bar that ended with Selby dead and a few murderers loose in the streets with a price on their heads, but you steered clear. Going after the killers meant going up against hundreds if not thousands of trained bounty hunters and assassins and no amount of money was worth dying over now, not while you were so close to freedom. Instead of chasing your doom, you decided to head to your room, get dressed up, and head out to wherever the music was loudest in search of a place to forget about your problems for the night. The thudding sounds of poorly DJ-ed club remixes led you to Leonardo’s Place. That’s where you found him.

You were two drinks in and sticking close to the wall when he stumbled into your line of sight. What initially caught your eye was his dancing. He couldn’t move for shit. What kept your attention, though, was his face.

There was transience to him, like at any moment someone could bump into him and he would disappear without a trace at their touch. Despite that he was gaudy. Everything about his clothing screamed wealth and fine taste from the thread count of his obnoxious purple turtleneck to the shine on his boots. He was strange, a walking contradiction, and one who had never had the pleasure of gracing your presence or screwing you over in the past. In the simplest of terms, he intrigued you. With nothing left to lose you downed the last of your cocktail and made your way to the gap in the crowd where the stranger had staked his claim. It was game time.

“You come here alone?” You asked. Your voice was barely a whisper above the heavy thrumming of the music.

He gave you a long look up and down before answering as if he were trying to size you up. Something about having his gaze linger on your body made your heartbeat soar. “I’m not looking for company,” His accented tone was gruff but left a sliver of room for reconsideration. You took the chance. What could go wrong?

With as much tact and grace as you could muster you let yourself slip a little closer to him. “What, do I look too expensive for you?” you teased, before backing off with a grin, “Thanks for the compliment, but I’m not here for that. My job is a little more… dangerous.” As you danced, the hem of your dress rode up your thigh just enough to reveal the knife holster in your garter belt. It pleased you greatly to see this handsome stranger do a double-take; that meant he was looking at your upper thigh in the first place. “I just liked what I saw in you… do you like what you see in me?”

Somehow, your little joke had endeared him to you, however minutely. Instead of brushing you off the man paused his jerky dancing for a moment to really take you in. Then, he caved. “Would you like a drink?” He asked.

You smirked. “Who would I be if I turned down a free drink from a handsome stranger,”

He met you in the middle as he offered you his hand. “I never promised it would be free,”

So, the two of you found yourselves at the bar, bodies leaned into each other and away from the rest of the sweltering crowd as the bartender slid you your order. The stranger was drinking a brandy straight while you opted for a sidecar. It was enough alcohol that you were starting to feel pretty buzzed, but you still felt in full control of yourself. You took a long sip before speaking. “So, what should I call you?”

It took him a moment to respond but once he did, he seemed sure of himself. “You can call me Helmut, but Baron is fine as well,”

You cocked up an eyebrow. “Is that a nickname?”

“More of a title,”

He took a drink as you gawked. “Like royalty?”

“Not like. I am,”

Your cheeks flushed. The rational part of your mind was so stunned by the ease with which Helmut lied that it seemed to short circuit completely, leaving you very puzzled and more than a little intrigued. “Well, pardon me, Mr. Baron. What’s royalty like you doing in a place like this?”

“There are plenty of reasons a man like me would have business here. A woman as beautiful as you, though… not so much,” he waved his hand in loose gestures as he spoke, “Why risk your life and beauty for this? A life living in the underground where you cannot so much as dream of seeing the stars?”

You finished your drink in one large swig. It burned down your throat but you relished in the pain. “Not all of us are lucky enough to be born in a place where we can see the stars. Funny enough, though, I’m just about to get out,”

“Is that right?”

“I finally saved up enough money from small jobs to buy my way out from under the Power Broker’s thumb,” Something about the way Helmut smiled at you made you feel safe. It was like you could tell him your worst, darkest secrets and not feel an ounce of fear or guilt. “I’m nothing special here, a small-time bounty hunter, and I kept it that way for a reason. I’m not valuable and I don’t know much. If I just pay my dues and keep the money coming until I can get their claws out of my back, I should be free to leave with a freighter tomorrow morning,”

Helmut was quick to respond. “Ah, travel by freighter. It’s terribly dangerous to be a stowaway, you know? Impossible to predict quite what the seas will be like,”

“Well, that’s just a risk I’ll have to take to get out of here and stop… what was it that you said I was doing? Risking my life and beauty?”

The two of you chuckled as Helmut took one last drink to empty his glass. Then, the conversation stilled. Around you people were alive, gyrating to the music as their pulses thumped to the beat, but it was like they weren’t even there. Instead, your whole being was focused on the strange man in front of you who had stolen away your sensibilities with his cool tone and thick accent. He made you feel alive. No, more than alive. Every color was brighter, every sound was sharper, every sip of your drink was crisper. He was a once-in-a-lifetime man, and this was a once-in-a-lifetime night. Oh, to hell with it!

“I like you, Baron,” you purred, pressing yourself close to him. His breath hitched the moment you touched him. He acted as if it had been a very long time since he was last touched like that. “And I think you like me too. In fact, I think you like me enough that we should take this conversation somewhere a little more private. What do you say?”

He didn’t respond. Instead, his gloved hand made its way around your wrist, and in a moment’s time, he was pulling you across the crowded dance floor towards a small, secluded hallway. You assumed that meant yes.

The instant you made it to the shelter of the shadows Helmut was on you like a man starved. One of his hands was quick to explore the skin just above the hem of your dress as the other pressed against the wall, caging you in and holding you as a more than willing hostage to his affections. He didn’t kiss your face, and you weren’t complaining about that, but he did put his mouth to good use sucking a dark bruise into your collarbone. His ministrations only stopped when a high, keening sound escaped your lips.

“You like that, don’t you, meine kleine schlampe?” he growled through gritted teeth. Something about his tone turned your already weak legs to jelly. The second you went limp in his grip, though, he pulled back. Straightening himself out, he offered you a steadying arm. You took it without hesitation. “I’m terribly sorry to be so rude. I assure you that I am not usually the type of man to hook up with someone on a whim, I’ve simply been… indisposed for many years and haven’t had many opportunities for pleasure, especially not with a woman as beautiful as you,”

His compliment was enough to have you blushing like a schoolgirl. You had killed more people than you could reasonably count, and probably fucked even more, but something about the way Helmut looked and sounded and acted made you feel almost innocent to his advances. He was a drug and you needed to get your fix before he disappeared forever.

“Does that mean you think I’m special?” You asked, all doe eyes with an innocent smile. Helmut ate it right up.

“Yes, schatzi. Very special,”

You hitched a leg up, letting your heel dig into his expensive dress pants and drag him closer to you once again. “First your little slut and now your little treasure? Which one is it, Helmut?”

“And so smart,”

“Move, Baron!”

At your insistence, Helmut was on you once again, leaving a trail of hot, wet kisses down your neck as he fiddled with his gloves, yanking them off and shoving them in his back pocket before he continued. “So demanding,” he chided, and yet he continued to lavish you with affection, his hand climbing higher and higher up your thigh. Your back was pressed flush to the wall now, and you were painfully aware of just how warm Helmut was. He smelled like a rich man’s cologne and yet his skin tasted of cheap soap when you leaned in to give him a bruise of his own.

“You love it,” you replied. He let out a husky laugh.

“I suppose I do,” he chuckled, and then his fingers brushed over your core. Your knees buckled. Helmut kept you upright with his body as he continued to taunt you through your underwear, but he seemed more confident now, almost cocky. “My needy schatzi, have you no patience?”

Your response was breathless; a confession.

“Not with you,”

Something about your words lit a fire in Helmut’s eyes. In an instant he had your leg hiked up while he ground his hardened length against your clothed wetness. Your mind went blank. He felt big. A mindless whimper fell from your lips.

“How do you want me?” Helmut asked. As he spoke he ran a light finger down your elevated thigh. You offered up another whimper. “I’ll need you to use your words and tell me what you want or I can’t give it to you,” His tone had you wet enough that you worried you were dripping.

With a gulp, you managed to fumble out the words. “I’ll blow you first if you promise to fuck me,”

That had him grinning like a wolf. “Perhaps you are my little schlampe, so eager to get down on your knees for me…” And you were. Even on shaky legs, you found yourself happily falling to your knees as the Baron fumbled with his fly. It was only then that you found yourself gazing down the hall towards the cacophony of lights and sounds and people maybe 20 feet away from your hiding place in the shadows. As if he could sense your discomfort, Helmut paused. “Are you alright?”

You nodded quickly. “I just forgot we were out in the open for a second,”

“Do you want to stop? If the location is the problem, I would gladly pause so we can find a new hideaway,” he stopped short, looking down and meeting your heavily lidded gaze, “or perhaps the idea of putting on a show excites you?” Your heart jumped out of your chest. Helmut noticed. “Well, if my little schlampe is so keen on putting on a show, she should get a move on,”

That was your cue to get to work. In a swift motion, you finished unzipping his fly and shifted his boxers, letting his lovely cock spring free. It was a pleasant penis and far as they went, average in length but thick with a leaking purple tip at half-mast. Just looking at it made you clamp your legs together.

Slowly, you gave a tentative lick up the underside of his length. He felt heavy on your tongue in the best of ways. Helmut jerked upward, a man possessed. You couldn’t help but laugh. “It’s been a long time, huh?”

“Less talking, more working little schlam-” you cut Helmut off quickly by taking most of his length into his mouth. That seemed to shut him up. His wolf-like grin had dissolved into a slack-jawed mess the second you started to suck him off. Oh, this was going to be fun.

For the most part, the Baron let you set the pace, bobbing your head and taking as much of his length as you comfortably could, but after a short while his hands were buried in your hair as he fought the urge to buck into your throat, hard. With a particularly rough snap of his hips, Helmut pulled away.

“You are an angel from heaven, schatzi,” he groaned, pulling himself slowly from your mouth as you got your first good deep breath in a while, “but a deal is a deal, and it wouldn’t be quite fair if I got to have all the fun, now would it?” Your breath hitched in your throat. Finally time for the main event.

Helmut was surprisingly gentle with you as he offered you a hand and helped you back up, only pausing to wipe a line of dribble off your chin with his thumb. With anyone else, it would have felt wholly humiliating but with Helmut… well, it did things to you you would rather not admit. You quirked up an eyebrow, though, when he got on his knees in turn, mirroring your past position. “What are you doing, Baron?”

“I simply assumed my sweet schatzi would enjoy a reward for taking my cock so well,” his words had you biting your lip as your cheeks flushed, “now be a good girl and take what I give you. I want to hear those pretty noises you made earlier,” With that, his face disappeared under your skirt. He pulled down your panties and… snickered?

“What now?” you groaned, squirming as his hot breath hit your exposed nub.

“You’re sopping wet,” he replied. Out of habit, you moved to shut your legs but found Helmut’s large hand was holding them open. “I do enjoy being sandwiched between your thighs, but you shouldn’t hide yourself from me. Take your pleasure. You’ve earned it,” That was when he began his assault on your folds.

You had been with plenty of partners over the years, all with varying proficiencies when it came to giving pleasure, but no one had ever made you feel quite as good as Helmut did while you gripped his hair and rode his face with reckless abandon. He always hit just the right spot, alternating between sucking on your sensitive clit and running his rough tongue in sloppy circles against it. In no time flat your pleasure was building toward’s its peak as your knees trembled.

“Helmut,” you squeaked, “Helmut I’m gonna cuuuUUOH!”

You were suddenly thrown over the edge of pleasure as the Baron worked you open with his fingers, pressing that spot inside of you just right. It was a revelation. Nothing would ever compare to him and you hadn’t even fucked yet. Once you had regained some semblance of stability he emerged from his place between your thighs, face slick with your juices, wearing the expression of a cat that got the cream.

“You make such lovely sounds for me, schatzi,” Helmut groaned, rising from his place at your feet and reaching into his pocket. While he fumbled for a condom you took the time to actually remove your panties, lifting one shaky leg at a time before balling them up and tossing them on the ground. You could grab them later. Or not! In all honesty, your ruined undies were the last thing on your mind as your watched Helmut roll the condom onto his proud cock, pumping himself a few times. “Now, are you sure you want this?”

You had never felt more sober in your whole life despite the drinks you’d downed earlier.

“God, yes,”

“Wonderful,”

He caged you into his body once again, lining himself up on your slick folds, and then with a pronounced bite against your collarbone, he was entering you. It wasn’t painful or uncomfortable, you just felt full, like a missing piece of your body had been completed. For the first few thrusts, you were too blissed out to really take note of anything around you, but once you tuned back into the world of the living you realized Helmut was talking. Well, babbling was more like it. He seemed to simply be speaking his stream of consciousness into your ear as he pistoned in and out of you like a madman. There was a jilted rhythm to it, but the abnormality kept you on your toes.

“I won’t be letting you go any time soon, schatzi, and definitely not on some dank freighter like a rat from the gutters. No, you will travel with me. Once I help my friends and slip away from the front lines I can take you anywhere your little heart desires. Paris, Vienna, Australia… Mein Gott, what a sweet cunt,”

Any sane woman, after hearing his sex-drunken musings, would have run. They would have heard the wild ramblings of a madman and left after their little fling was done to never see him again. It was only rational. He didn’t even know your real name. Sane women didn’t run away with strangers claiming to be barons they hooked up with in a seedy club selling stolen Van Goghs in a hub of the criminal underworld.

The only thing was, though, that you weren’t a sane woman.

You were a killer, a child left in the streets to live or die who had scraped themselves together and dragged themselves towards life. So what if the idea of some rich mysterious benefactor with a good dick coming in to save the day sounded fantastic? It was fantastic. Like your own personal version of Pretty Woman. Even if he wasn’t as rich as he claimed to be, being poor and getting dicked down by him was better than being poor and alone.

For just a moment, and with no regrets, you let yourself get lost in the fantasy and just let go.

It was as if Helmut could sense a difference.

“Are you close, little schlampe?” He gasped, letting his thrusts take on a faster staccato rhythm.

You could do little more than moan and nod as he pounded you into the wall. That seemed to be enough for him to get the message, though.

“What a good girl,” he purred. His mouth was so close to your ear, his hot breath tickling the sensitive flesh with each heaving breath he took. As he chased his own climax, he brought a hand between your bodies and rubbed tight, wet circles around your clit. It was already sensitive, your body was only barely recovering from your first orgasm, and yet something about the overstimulation was thrilling, like racing towards an impossible dream. With a shout, you came for the second time, melting into Baron Helmut’s arms as he quickly followed.

The two of you stayed there, slumped against the cool wall and still connected by your dripping sexes, for a few moments, breathing heavy. Surprisingly, you were the first to speak.

“Wow,” you breathed, letting a soft laugh escape your lips.

Helmut returned the sentiment. “You were wonderful,” In a strange moment of intimacy, he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead, but then he pulled out, tying off the full condom and tossing it to the ground as he tucked himself back into his boxers and zipped up his fly.

“Are you just gonna leave that there?” you made a gesture towards his litter.

“They have janitors,”

A burbling laugh escaped from your lips. “That they do,”

Back in the main room of the party, the crowd had only grown larger as the night progressed. Nobody had seen you, nor had they noticed your cries as they danced and drank and made merry under the neon lights. You were, for all intents and purposes, invisible at Helmut’s side. Within and without. There was something exhilarating about knowing he was the only one that truly saw you in a room packed with hundreds. It was like something out of a twisted fairytale.

“So…” you broached the subject gently while you pulled down your dress to protect your modesty, “Did you mean what you said back there about Paris and Vienna, or…”

“Oh, you heard that?”

You snickered. “It was pretty hard not to with you breathing in my ear,”

“I apologize,” he leaned against the wall beside you, shoulder to shoulder in the darkness, “but yes, I meant what I said. I-”

Suddenly, from down the hall, a booming voice interrupted your moment.

“There you are!”

“Goddamnit, Zemo, I thought we told you to stay low not hire an escort,”

There, at the mouth of the hallway, stood two massive men. They were obviously displeased, and though their faces were obscured by the lights you could tell you weren’t the one they were after.

They called him Zemo… where had you heard that name before?

Helmut stepped away from the wall with a shrug. “At least I didn’t cause a scene by forgetting to put my phone on silent,”

The larger of the two men stayed where he was, while the other walked to meet the Baron in the middle.

“I swear to God, man, you’ve gotten ten times more insufferable since I learned you were rich.

The Baron shrugged. “It comes with the territory,”

“But you don’t have to be such a jackass about it,”

You felt it was a good time to chime in.

“Thank you so much for that, Helmut, but I think I should give you guys some privacy,” you said, straightening out your dress and walking deeper into the hallway. There had to be an exit somewhere…

“Wait!” When you turned, you found Helmut rushing to meet you. The men in the background looked shocked and almost smug. “Save your money. Meet me out at the airstrip tomorrow afternoon if you feel like seeing me again. If not, know that the Power Broker doesn’t let go of assets cheap, and you just slept with a man with a million dollar bounty, so buying your freedom isn’t an option. If you want to go without me, you’ll have to hitch a ride on a cargo ship but not as a stowaway. Working for your keep is the best way to stay under the radar. Nobody can touch you once you’r-”

You cut him off by pressing a finger to his lips. “I’ll see you at your private jet, Baron,”

He smirked. “So you will,” With as much gusto as a man could muster, he returned to his companions but not before offering one last goodbye. “Farewell, schatzi, until tomorrow,”

As you leaned up against the wall once more, you watched them go with a twinkle in your eye.

“Who was that?”

“None of your business, James,”

“Guys, what the hell did I just step on?”

“I believe that was my used rubber,”

“ZEMO!”

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a/n: I hope you enjoyed the filth! I haven’t written for Zemo before, even though I’ve loved him for years, but he’s definitely going into my main rotation now. If you have any ideas, send them my way! I’d love to fill the void, because there just aren’t very many Zemo x reader fics out there. If you enjoyed this, maybe reblog or leave a comment! I’d love to hear your thoughts. Thanks again!

Please do not post my works to any other sites, thanks! <3

[bump1nthen1ght]

Sex on the Rocks (Merman x Reader)

Pairing: Male!Reader/Merman

Genre: Urban Fantasy, Established Relationship

Warnings: 18+ content under the cut!, Size Kink, Breeding Kink

Word Count: 2578 words

Summary: You and your boyfriend discover some new things about yourselves.

Request: May I request a Merman x Male Reader? With a size kink, and breeding kink if you're open to that. Thank you! ❤️

“Can you see it?”

“Nope! This rock’s a bit too slippery-” An unflattering yelp leaves you as your hand loses its grip on the stone, your wet feet lacking any grip as you slide off the boulder and back into the cold ocean water. Your head goes under for only a second before Juno grabs you by the armpits, yanking you back up.

You sputter and cough, collapsing back onto Juno’s chest as you shake water out of your hair. Juno cranes his neck forward, barely hiding a laugh.

“You good?”

“Y-yeah, just...lost my grip for a second.” You shrug off Juno’s hands. He quirks an eyebrow up, like he doesn’t believe you, and you roll your eyes. “The water’s like, five feet deep, I’ll survive.”

“I don’t know.” Juno teases, playing with your messy hair, “I know you humans aren’t the best at swimming. But don’t worry,” Juno throws his large arm around your shoulder, “I can be your Orca in shining armor.” Juno winks, a strand of his long, black hair falling over his shoulder. He looks like he belongs on a romance novel cover.

You push yourself off of  Juno’s chest, giving him a playful slap.“Okay, Romeo, whatever you say. But we should find a place to chill out if we want to catch the sunset.”

Juno laughs, pushing his hair out of his face before he nods.

The two of you usually come to this cove on your date nights, finding a nice spot on the beach to laze around and talk before watching the sun descend together. But some teenagers had decided to throw a huge bonfire this very night and the beach was way too crowded for any alone time. Juno’s idea had been to swim farther out into the sea and chill on some rocks, but so far none had been both comfortable and able to view the horizon.

The two of you look around, trying to find a rock safe enough for you to climb, before Juno hums.

“I got an idea.”

You barely have time to get out a ‘What” before Juno’s arms are wrapping around your knees and hoisting you up into the air, your hands scrambling to find purchase in his hair  as your legs wrap around his chest. Juno shows no sign of exertion as he presses up even higher, shifting his forearm to support your thighs and pointing you towards the sea. “How about that? Can you see it now?”

The wheeze that leaves you is a terrible impersonation of a ��yes’, your face locked onto the ocean  as you feel your chest begin to burn with embarrassment.

Your ankles dig into Juno’s shoulder muscles, barely wrapping around his large torso as  his tree-trunk arms carry you like a bag of flour.

You knew Juno was strong; He’s a goddamn Killer Whale Merman with an upper body the size of a small table, of course he’s strong.

But wow, did the way he easily throw you around turn you on way more than you thought it would.

You nod your head, taking a deep breath as you try and focus on other things, not about  rock hard your boyfriend just got you.

Unfortunately for you, the position you're in has your crotch pressed right up against Juno’s chest, in between his strong pectoral muscles.

Juno’s eyes drop to your navel, clearly noticing your growing bulge. His expression doesn’t even shift;  His arms just loosen and let your body drop down, until you and him are face to face.

“Are you hard right now?”

You nod, trying to play it cool. It wasn’t as  if this was  weird, you two were dating, but  something about getting a boner from something so simple had you a little embarrassed. Like you were 13 years old again, sneaking peeks at porno magazines and Monster Manuals under your covers late at night.

“Was it because I picked you up?”

You pause, nodding slower this time as you avert your gaze. But a claw comes under your chin, tilting it towards Juno with a slow, controlled push.

Juno had always been a huge teddy bear. You wouldn’t think it, what with the rows of sharp teeth, his long claws, and the myriad of scars that decorate his back and shoulders. But he was as sweet and docile as an Orca Merman could be.

But the look in his eyes at this moment sends a shiver down your spine; They’re so intense and focussed, if you didn’t know better you would think you were about to become his next meal. He rolls his gaze up and down your body, noting how your breath catches when he moves his hand down your neck. He runs his hand downward, thumb brushing against your collarbone and his claws tickling your pulse point. He licks his lips and the smirk he gives you might be the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen.

“Oh, you like that? Then how about,” In a quick movement, he presses his body up against yours, forcing you against a nearby rock, “This?”

Water drips from his chest and onto your face as he pins one of his hands right next to your face, looking down at you with a sultry look. You suck in a harried breath as an overwhelming heat resonates in your belly. The end of his tail curls around your ankles under the water and his other hand wraps around your neck. His grip is light, but it serves as a reminder of how easily he can pin you down, how vulnerable you are in his large, very large hands.

‘Thats, uh,” You suck up the excess saliva building in your mouth, “That’s...r-really good.”

“Hmm?” Juno chuckles, playfully squeezing your neck before his hand drops down to your chest. He pushes his palm into your skin and flexes out his fingers, covering a good portion of your upper half. “You like being pinned, my little mate?”

Words have fully departed from your mind, so you just nod your head, breathless.

Juno leans down and places a gentle kiss on your jaw. It’s light and delicate, like the Juno you know, but the heat it spreads across your body is anything but.

“Naughty boy.” He whispers in your ear, before licking a stripe up your neck. You lean and curve your neck into his mouth, desperate for his affectionate kisses and nips. His teeth just barely meet your skin, enough to leave little bruises and send shocks across skin. “I can’t wait to fill you up.” Juno wraps his atoms under your thighs, yanking them around his hips and forcing you upward. Your crotch presses against his navel as he shifts you both toward a flatbed of stone. “You’ll look so good, dripping with my seed.” Juno hoists your body up onto the rock, his large hand pressing against your stomach and pushing you onto your back. You do so easily, the cold surface feeling especially icy against your flushed skin. Juno pulls himself over you, his triceps bulging as he lays his massive form on top of you. As he rests on his forearms, careful not to crush you under his weight, water drips from his soaked hair and onto your face. “My pretty boy. My beautiful, fuckable, mate.” Juno purrs, claws stroking the side of your face.

You weave your hands around his neck, pulling him down for a searing kiss. His tongue easily overwhelms yours as his large chest presses down into you. Your hands travel to his back and clench around his shoulder muscles, craving the feeling of his skin on yours. He’s so much taller than you that you barely reach his lower abdomen, but you fumble your hand downwards to his slit, eyes still clenched shut as you make out.

The hardness of his exposed shaft finds your fingers, dripping with his pre-cum and hot against your palm. You squeeze, clumsily and fervently, and Juno chuckles.

“So eager.” He pulls away, a long strand of saliva connecting you two. “Don’t worry, it’ll be deep,” Juno thrusts into your hand with a grunt, “deep inside you soon.”

With a soft pat on your cheek, Juno scoots himself down your body until his face is level with your crotch. He grabs the tent in your swim shorts, giving it a playful squeeze before grabbing the bottom of your thighs and lifting you up. You shimmy your hips to get the article of clothing off, but before it can even go past your ankles, Juno presses your lower half upwards and folds you in two.

You crane your neck forward, trying to see Juno’s next move, before the feeling of his hot tongue on your ass sends your head back against the rock. You let out a groan as Juno’s tongue begins to prod the ring of muscle, his large fingers leaving indents on your legs as he voraciously digs in.

Jun has always been quite dexterous with his long tongue; On your first date he showed off how easily he could tie a cherry stem into a knot, which had done things to your body not exactly appropriate for a first meeting. It’s also slightly ribbed at the sides, teasing your insides at just the right spots and adding an extra hint of friction as he reaches far inside you. You pant and claw at the rock below you, before finding purchase in Juno’s hair. Your climax grows steadier and steadier. It strains your shoulders and neck, but you try and peer up and look at how perfectly he eats your ass out.

Knife sharp, baby blue eyes meet yours, and it’s like a gallon of ice-water has just washed over you, goosebumps rising all over your skin as Juno sends you a wink.

You’ve never seen this playful, dominating side of him before. You can’t help but thank your improper boner for awakening it inside him. Especially when he hits that part- that part-ooooh.

Juno detaches with a pop, his tongue sliding out of your ass as he licks his lips. With one hand still firmly gripped around your thigh, he pushes himself up so you’re face to face. His long fingers splay out next to your neck, his palm easily matching the size of your head, as you give him a dazed and pleasured look.

“You ready?”

You nod, drool pooling in your mouth as your eyes wander up and down his body, your lower half seizing as he playfully squeezes your thigh. He removes it to grab his shaft, spitting into his palm as he strokes and places his tip at your entrance.

“Tell me if the stretch is too much, okay?” Juno whispers, that familiar sweetness back in his voice. You nod, but all you’re focused on is that little bit of pressure, teasing what's to come.

Juno slowly inserts himself and  he both of you throw your heads back with a groan. He worries his  bottom lip as he sinks farther and farther into you, pressing your thighs up to your chest. The harsh scrape of stone rings in your ears as his claws dig into the rock, small pebbles flying outward as he leaves long, white marks below him.

Your eyes roll into the back of your head as Juno finally reaches his base, comfortably seating himself inside you with a small roll of his hips. His chuckle is stuttered, peppered with a moan as he gives another tiny thrust.

“Hm, good job, taking me all the way in. For a second I thought I might be too-” Juno humps with a little more vigor, forcing the air out of your lungs, “Big for you.”

You shake your head. “N-No. You’re just-Ah!-right.”

Juno laughs again, giving you a small peck on the cheek.

“Good.”

With that, Juno slowly amps his pace, adding more thrusts with a lot more power. His jutting  hip bones dig into your  ass cheeks as he punctuates each thrust; Grinding deliciously against your prostate before pulling out until only the tip is left. He moves the hand by your head up to your other thigh, clutching tight as he lays his weight against your lower body. Your knees have been pressed into your collarbone, the stretch a little uncomfortable for your lower back, but the shockwaves of ecstasy do everything to relieve it.

“Don’t think-” Ungh “I’ve ever been this deep in you before.” Ah “Can’t wait to f-fill you, it will be so delicious.”

Your tongue has started to fall out of your mouth as your brain grows fuzzy, your only responses being slurred “Yes” and “Uh-huh.”

“You’re going to look so good, dripping with my cum. I’ll pump you so full, my beautiful little mate.” Juno’s claws dig into your skin, leaving small, white half-moons in the meat of your thigh. “Perfect little breeder. You’ll take it all, huh? Don’t want to waste-” Juno gives a harsh thrust, “a-” and then another, “-drop.”

You nod, movement uncoordinated as  your climax begins to reach its peak. The burning in your gut feels red-hot, and you wrap your ankles around Juno’s lower bag, urging him to go deeper, hit even harder. Juno lets out a delicious moan.

“You want it? Say it, beg for my cum.”

Juno slows down his thrusts, getting tantalizing close to your deepest spot before pulling out. You whimper.

“Please, please! Give me your cum, give me it, all of it!”

Juno leans down and gives you a long, passionate kiss, before resuming his pace. Your lower half begins to  jerk as you get closer, closer, closer-”

“Ungh, cumming!” Juno roars as the two of you climax together, his dick pouring thick load after load into your ass. You can feel it seep into your skin, dripping out of your ass as Juno rides out his own orgasm with tiny humps. The shiny substance coats his navel and crotch, catching the setting sun as he finally pulls out.

Your legs scream with relief as they uncurl, relaxing your legs onto the cool stone below. Juno unfurls his claws and collapses next to you, chest heaving and his skin flushed pink. The sound of your breath and the crashing waves is all that lingers, both of you too tired to even form a thought.

A shaky claw pets the side of your face, pushing some unruly hair out of the way. You turn your neck to  the side, enjoying Juno’s content and debauched face.

“We should,” He sighs, “Do that position more often.”

All you can do is nod, leaning just close enough to give your boyfriend a bunny kiss.

“Yeah, definitely.”

As the two of you catch your breath,you notice the blend of purples and pink hues off the sky above. You crane your neck upward a tiny bit and catch the slightest bit  of yellow, hinting a trail to the sunset, still out of your view.

You cuddle up to Juno’s chest, resting your head on his pecks, and point upwards.

“Do you see the colors?”

“Yeah,” Juno whispers, a claw playing with your hair, “It’s beautiful.”

The sun falls far away, the night sky darkening into a pitch black, with few spots free of light pollution. The wind brings a chill and you know the swim back is going to be a bitch on your muscles.

But in the arms of your boyfriend, everything feels perfect.

[theunquenchablethirst]

Hooked (Jerome X Reader)

Ok, so this is a thing. I was kinda surprised nobody had used this scene yet, because the Gotham fandom seem to collectively agree that Jerome is BIG KINKY and yet the one scene where he canonically has people cuffed up and hung from the ceiling... nobody has touched??? Y'all have been sleeping on that scene! It's fanfic gold! Anyway, enjoy the hedonism. Much love xxx

Warning: SMUT, 18+, GRAPHIC SEXUAL CONTENT, BDSM, bondage, cuffs, dom/sub, vaginal fingering, oral sex, biting, spanking, slapping, pussy slapping, light choking, spitting, belt whipping, praise/degradation, marking, mention of scratching, Jerome is big meanie pants mean man

The new mayor of Gotham is having a meeting with his council members, but things take a turn when the Legion of Horribles show up to kidnap them and reader. When the victims are being unloaded from the truck, Jerome Valeska notices reader, because she isn't exactly on the guest list.

Tag list of lovelies: @gabile18 @valeskaduh @fangirl--writes @persephoneblck

Masterlist

I had been working as a housekeeper for the new mayor. It was a good job, but I wasn't appreciated. I was just there to clean and serve when needed. I don't think he even knew my name. I was just hired help to him. To all of them.

He was hosting a dinner for his council that day. I had been placed in the corner of the room with a bottle of expensive wine where I was to wait until wanted. He gestured for me to come forwards and fill their glasses while they started talking about their displeasure with the rising foul play in the city, like it was anything new for Gotham. The chairwoman wanted to know what he was going to do about it. Very little in my opinion. He was just coasting. In too deep over his head. He had been appointed far too fast and everyone knew it. He wasn't going to last.

He made an attempt to save face and talk about how he too was disturbed by the recent goings on and was doing everything he could. Trash, utter trash. As he rose from his seat, the lights fizzled out. I stopped pouring. Had this been any other city I would have assumed it was a simple power outage, but nothing was that simple in Gotham. The security guard closed us in and went to see what was happening. The air turned icy. No, this was not good. Gunshots and screams came from the hallway and everyone rose from the table terrified. We quickly started walking towards a door hoping to make an escape, but there was something about the windows. They were freezing over.

The doors burst open and I dropped the wine. It smashed into pieces as a blueish man in some kind of robotic suit and a weird looking, but huge gun stepped into the room. Was that Victor Fries? Then through the second set of doors another man in a top hat who I recognised as Jervis Tetch burst in with some other strange looking friends.

Before I could comprehend the situation, we were all being cuffed and taken outside. Our kidnappers pushed and pulled us towards a huge truck, all the while the mayor tried to buy his way free. He was showing just how little he really knew about the underbelly of Gotham. I knew just by looking at them that they were probably Arkham escapees and couldn't be bought like a sane man could. They had their own plans and you can't bargain with crazies.

We got to the truck and they opened the back door. My blood ran cold when I saw that standing there waiting for us was Jerome Valeska. Of all the criminals Gotham had seen he had been the only one that had scared me, truly and thoroughly. He didn't have any kind of reason for what he did. He just enjoyed death and chaos. And after his last escapade he looked like madness personified, his scars circling his face and eyes and giving him a permanent evil smile. Dread consumed me as I realized that he was no doubt the leader of this operation and if that was true, we were already dead.

I felt myself jolted forwards. The mayor had pushed me in front of the rest of the council to get whatever was coming first. If I wasn't cuffed, I would have turned around and broke his nose. I was lifted into the truck, my hands were pulled above my head and fixed to two hooks. I had to stand on my toes to keep standing which made it awkward and difficult as they pushed me to the back of the truck.

Was that Penguin? What was he doing here? He didn't belong here. I had gone to Penguin looking for a job in his club when I was 16. He was impressed with my audition, but when he asked my age, he rejected me.

"This establishment is not a playground for children. It's a nightclub." He had told me. At the time I had been steaming mad, but in hindsight he was probably right. Even if he was rude. So, after that, I found it hard to understand why he was here and working with Valeska. Maybe he had been kidnapped too?

The rest of the council were loaded on and hooked. The mayor was still trying to offer them money and pardons. When he saw it wasn't working, he resorted to empty, unintimidating threats. Jerome was completely unfazed and even a little disappointed in the lack of smiles.

"Nobody knows how to have fun anymore, right?" He said putting his arm around Penguin. So, he was a part of this.

Jerome pointed to a scary looking figure dressed like a scarecrow. Johnathan Crane? Crane released some kind of purple gas in the face of a member of a council. She started laughing and convulsing violently.

"What have you got to lose? Except your sanity?" Jerome joined in the crazy laughter. So, this was his plan. He'd figured out a way to forcefully drive everyone insane. With a gas.

I silently prayed to God in my mind for any kind of help.

After sufficiently terrifying us half to death, they left us in the back of truck. None of us could say anything and after a few minutes the truck started moving.

"Is she ok?" I asked looking towards the victim of the insanity gas.

"Who cares?! We have to figure out what they want and get out of here." Replied the mayor.

"Maybe they want publicity for whatever that gas is. Offer them some TV time." Guessed the chairwoman.

"Don't you get it?! This isn't a situation you can buy your way out of!" I snapped, frustrated with their idiocy.

"These aren't normal criminals. They don't want your money. They want chaos and madness." They stood there silently stunned. They had never heard me speak with such confidence, but in that moment, they knew I was right.

After what felt like hours the truck finally stopped.

"What's going on?" The mayor whispered.

Everything was quiet. We listened for any noise or sign of life. All we could hear was our own breath.

Then suddenly the doors flung open once again and in hopped Valeska, Tetch and Crane.

"We're here!" Jerome grinned.

The other two started to pull the council one by one off the hooks and walk them out of the truck, closely watched by Jerome. Until they got to me.

"Wait..." He stuck an arm out to stop Tetch from unhooking me.

"Who's she? She wasn't on the party list." He took a few steps closer to me.

"This poor young girl is an unlucky maid. Wrong place, wrong time. Very bad day." Jervis explained looking at me.

"Would you like me to... dispose of her?" Asked Crane, stalking close to me and lifting needle covered fingers to my throat.

"Not so fast, Mr Potato Head." Jerome said pulling him away from me.

He came so close that we were only inches apart. He looked down at me as if he was thinking for a few seconds then smirked and turned around to the others.

"Guys, go and see that our guests are comfortable, will ya? Get everything ready." He ushered them out of the truck. Fear travelled up and down my body. This had all been a bad situation, but being alone with Valeska scared the hell out of me.

"You're lucky I have a soft spot for pretty little girls." He closed the truck doors and turned to look at me.

"Freddy Krueger there... not so much." He relaxed, leaning back against the doors with his hands in his pockets. "You got a name?"

I stayed silent, more out of fear than defiance. He sucked his teeth and stood up straight.

"I get it. You're scared. Who wouldn't be, right?" He started slowly walking closer. "But things will go a lot smoother if you just play nice."

I still couldn't find any words.

"Aw, come on, doll! I'm getting awful lonely over here." He brought his hands up out of his pockets and leaned against a wall of the truck.

He was quiet for a few seconds and I noticed that his eyes were making their way up my legs. Being held up by my wrists on my tip toes had pulled my uniform skirt up and almost all of my thighs were exposed. I blurted out my name in an attempt to distract him from my bare legs. He smiled.

"What a pretty name. Now, was that so hard?" He pushed himself off the wall and came a little closer.

"So, you're the mayor's dust bunny, huh? I gotta say, doll, I can see why he keeps you around." He chuckled, eyeing me.

My whole body flushed and my face turned hot and red.

“But, uh, the thing about mayors in this town, they don’t last very long.”

"Please let me go." I whimpered.

"Oh, but we're having such a good time! Plus, if I did that, you'd scamper off to the GCPD and I can't have good ol' Gordon crashing the party early."

I scoffed at his suggestion. Not likely. I had a distinct distaste for the GCPD. They hadn't helped me when I needed them. I would never need them again.

"What's the matter? He book ya before or something?" Jerome smiled with intrigue.

"My parents... they... did things to us. When I ended up in the hospital one too many times..." Tears stung my eyes as I remembered. "They left me there and disappeared with my little brother. No one ever managed to track them down."

I didn’t fully understand why I was opening up to Jerome, but for a second, I saw a spark of humanity in his eyes. Like he understood my pain. I'd heard his first kill had been his mother, so maybe he did?

"I'd give anything to see him again." I sniffed and a tear rolled down my cheek.

"Yeah, I had shitty parents too." He sighed. "I killed them both."

I had thought about what I would do if I ever saw my parents again. What I would say, what I would ask. I could never think of the right words. But the thought of killing them, well that made me smile.

"What was it like?" I asked.

Jerome grinned from ear to ear and stepped closer so that we were toe to toe.

“Have you ever stood at the edge of a really tall building? You know that little voice in the back of your head that says ‘Jump! You can fly!’ even though every other part of you is screaming ‘No you can’t! You’re gonna kill us!’”

I nodded shakily.

“It’s like finally giving in to that voice. Like jumping off Gotham Bridge and finding out you can fly. And realising you never have to walk again.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat and my heart felt like it was going a million beats per minute. His eyes were locked on mine and it felt like he was looking straight into my soul.

“You wanna fly, doll?” He brought his hand up to cup my jaw and ran his thumb along my bottom lip.

It wasn’t humanity I saw in Jerome Valeskas eyes. It was freedom. A freedom that I had wanted for as long as I could remember. And I could have it right now. He was offering it to me. The only thing standing in my way was myself.

“Yes.” I breathed. “Yes, I do.”

The next thing I knew, his lips were crashing into mine and he had hooked his hands under my thighs and was holding them around his waist. His kiss was desperate and hungry, like he had been starved for days and his grip on the bare flesh of my thighs was rough enough to leave bruises. I locked my ankles together behind him to steady myself from swaying underneath the cuffs. When I did, he drove his crotch forwards, grinding into my centre, a quiet moan escaping me as I felt him.

He slowly trailed a hand from my thigh, up my back and to the nape of my neck, before balling my hair in his fist. I gasped as I felt the sudden, sharp tug of him pulling my head back.

His eyes wandered down to settle on my exposed throat, before yanking my head to the side and nestling in the crook of my neck. He must’ve left a hundred open mouth kisses, but as he started to suck, I felt his teeth sink into my skin. I pulled back with a hiss at the sting, but he wouldn’t let go. He just kept on leaving harsh, red bitemarks and pulling my hair, all the time grinding harder into me.

He licked over the bruises he’d left and gently kissed them, before trailing his tongue up my neck to nip at my ear. He smiled darkly and pulled back away from me, dropping my legs back to the floor. He stalked around me, eyeing me up and down like a predator. I felt him behind me, his hands softly holding onto my waist, pulling me close to his chest.

“You know what’s great about this?” He cooed. “You’re already pre-cuffed.”

I flushed and my core swelled hot, his breath so close to me made my skin tingle all over. He pulled at the top of my skirt and dragged it down my hips, letting it fall down around my feet. He caressed my thighs and then stepped back, tugging at my underwear, playfully letting the elastic snap back to me.

“Y’know...” He said, before the familiar sound of a belt unbuckling. “Marquis de Sade said ‘sex without pain is like food without taste’...”

My eyes widened at his words and my heartbeat quickened.

“So, let’s make this... delicious.”

A million thoughts raced through my mind, but before I could process any, I felt the sharp snap of leather against my ass. I jolted forwards and let out a high pitch yelp.

Even though I couldn’t see him, I could tell he was smirking. I could hear it in his voice. I bit my lip in an attempt to brace myself and he landed the belt across me again.

“Please, Jerome...” I whimpered at the sting, closing my eyes.

He brought it down again, making me arch my back in a gasp. A couple of tears rolled down my cheeks and I realised there was little point in resisting the torment. So, I gritted my teeth and prepared for another lick of the belt.

He whipped me once more, harder this time and a small scream escaped me.

“Please!” I begged.

I heard him chuckle with dark delight. The bastard was enjoying this. Of course he was. What else had I expected from someone like him? I tightened all my muscles for the next sting...

But it didn’t come. Instead, I felt him pulling my underwear down. Relief washed over me when I heard the belt drop to the floor and I realised Jerome was finished and was now crouched, ready to inspect his work. He ran his fingers over my burning flesh, taking in the bright red lashes he had left on me.

“What a pretty picture?” He said, landing a spank. “I wish you could see too doll, but having you cuffed is half the fun.”

His voice was dripping with venom and arousal and I could practically feel his grin in the air. He traced the marks with his fingers a little longer, before grabbing my flesh in fistfuls and sinking his teeth in. I gasped loudly at the hard bite. I wasn’t sure how many more of Jerome's surprises I could take. He laughed and ran his tongue over the new bruise.

“Yep. Definitely a pretty picture.” He smiled, giving me another spank. “I like those little noises you make, doll. Why don’t you make some more for me?”

He snaked his hand up my inner thigh and began stroking along my slit, relighting the fire in my stomach. I moaned, biting hard on my lip and tried to bring my thighs together, wanting friction.

“Naughty.” He said, landing a swift slap on my entrance causing me to let out a little yelp. “I need you to keep those legs open for me.”

It wasn’t as bad as the belt. In fact, it felt quite good. The heat inside me swelled as Jerome returned to running his fingers back and forth in my slickness. I hummed softly in my throat, fighting the urge to close my thighs again, my knees starting to shudder underneath me.

“Look how wet you are and I’m barely touching you.” Jerome chuckled darkly. “I wonder what happens if I do this?”

Jerome plunged two fingers deep inside me and slowly started pumping them. I let the warmth roll through me, moaning blissfully. He gently started to pick up speed, making it nearly impossible for me to keep my thighs apart. The faster he got, the deeper he dove, making me tighten around his talented fingers and struggle to keep steady on my toes.

My legs were shaking and despite my best efforts I just had to squeeze them together. As soon as I did, Jerome removed his fingers from me, leaving me feeling empty and spanked me hard.

“What did I say about that?” He barked, laying down another spank.

His spanking felt different this time. It felt pleasurable and sent a thrill up my spine.

“Sorry.” I whimpered.

“Sorry for what?” He spanked me again. “For being a needy little whore? Hm?” Another spank.

“Yes!” I gasped. “I’m a needy little whore! I just...”

“What? You just what?”

Jerome landed another slap at my core. It made my muscles clench, but it also aroused me so much more in a way I’d never thought I’d experience.

“What? What do you want, whore?”

“Please...”

“Big words, princess. What...” Spank. “Do you...” Another spank. “Want?”

“I want... I want you...” I forced, breathlessly.

“You want me? What do you want me to do, princess?” Jerome teased, tracing a finger along my burning entrance, just barely touching me.

“Please... Make me feel good, Jerome... Make me cum.”

“Are you gonna be a good girl?”

“Yes...”

“Are you gonna do as I say?”

“Yes, I will.”

“Exactly as I say?”

“Yes! Yes! Yes! Just please...Jerome.”

I couldn’t take it any longer. I felt so pathetic and needy. I needed him to touch me.

“So desperate.” He giggled sadistically. I supposed he loved seeing me beg.

Then, finally, he spread me open and dove his tongue deep into my wanting warmth. I closed my eyes and bit down hard on my lip as he swirled his tongue around inside me. I wanted to grab his hair and feel it in my fingers, but all I could do was squeeze my fists together in empty frustration.

Jerome grabbed a hand full of my ass, gripping it tightly, digging his nails in and rose his other hand to my pelvis front, pulling me down further onto his tongue. I squealed, a delightful mixture of pleasure and also pain from the tugging on my aching forearms. He ran his front hand down to play with my swollen clit, circling his fingers around beautifully.

He grinded his face deeply into me, sliding his tongue up, down, around and around inside me. He pressed his fingers down harder on my clit, forcing a loud moan out of me. I felt the pressure inside me build, coiling and tightening like a burning spring. I squeezed my thighs around his head in a desperate attempt to pull him deeper, his tongue nestling inside finding all of my sweet spots and lighting them on fire.

I could feel myself ready, ready to burst. He was pulling an amazing orgasm out of me and I wanted nothing more than to just let it go. All it took was one more upward jolt of his head, pushing his tongue that last little bit deep enough to push me over. I screamed out in erotic pleasure, letting the feeling flood me like warm water. My back arched and my legs convulsed until I withered, letting myself dangle from my cuffs in a breathless defeat.

Jerome slid his tongue out of me and pulled his face back away.

“You sing so pretty, dollface. Like a little birdie.” He said, squeezing the flesh off my ass.

He gave me one more light bite and a spank, before he rose back up to stand, snaking his hands along my sides all the way. He let his hands wander up to cup my breasts, massaging them softly. He leaned in close and began leaving wet kisses in the crook of my neck. I shuddered, his touch sending a cool tingle down my spine. He let his hands squeeze my breasts slightly harder, then pulled away and crept back around in front of me.

He stood facing me, his eyes locked on mine. They seemed to burn holes right into my flesh, creating a sense of fear in me. I was scared of Jerome Valeska, I truly was. But everything he was doing to me right now... The way he touched me, kissed me. I wondered how he managed it. How he was able to both terrify and arouse me in equal amounts.

Lost in my thoughts, I didn’t register his hand rising until it was firmly wrapped around my throat. He leaned down to kiss me, dominating my mouth with his tongue, making me taste myself. Once again, I felt the familiar warmth build in my core as I sensed we were not quite done here. He finished the kiss with a little nip to my bottom lip.

“Are you scared of me, doll?” He purred.

I swallowed hard, unsure if truth was wise here. Then I felt him increase the pressure around my throat, not wanting to wait for an answer.

“Yes.” I breathed.

“Good.” He said through an evil smirk.

He crashed his lips to mine once again, his free hand picking up my thigh to wrap around him. I locked both my legs around his waist, wanting to feel him close against me. I felt his erection hard, under his clothes, grinding into me and I wanted it. Badly. He pulled away from the kiss, leaving his taste on my tongue and raised his hand from my throat to grab hold of my face. He took his other hand away from my thigh and pulled at his tie. I didn’t drop my legs this time, instead I gripped tighter as he slid his tie from around his neck and scrunched it in his fist.

“Open your mouth.” He ordered.

I did as he said and he smiled, before spitting into my open lips and gagging me with his tie. I’d never had anyone do that before and it shocked me a little, but then again, I’d never had anyone like Jerome Valeska before.

He backed up slightly, just enough for him to reach down and unzip his trousers and pull down his underwear, freeing his erection. I couldn’t help but look down at it. It was bigger than any I’d taken before and I wasn’t sure how prepared I was. He started to slowly stroke himself, lifting up my chin to look at me.

He gently stroked a single finger across my jaw and then, suddenly, landed a harsh slap across my cheek. I yelped at the slap, causing a dangerous smile to form on Jeromes mouth. I should’ve been repulsed by him. He killed people and was aroused by my pain and fear, so why was I so attracted to him?

He angled himself underneath me so he was lined up and ready. He wrapped his hand back around my throat and then pushed forwards into me, causing us both to let out deep moans.

“You like that?”

I nodded and whimpered through the material of the tie. Jerome giggled darkly and with his free hand, gripped onto my waist.

“Brace yourself, princess.” He warned, through a poisonous smile.

He pulled back slowly, until he was almost completely out of me and then, like a bullet, ploughed himself right back in, jolting me backwards with force. He continued his thrusting rough and fast, making me whimper and bite down hard on the tie. I closed my legs tightly around him, pulling him closer and forcing him in deeper.

He let out a low, guttural groan and moved his hand upwards from my waist to slap me again, spitting at my face as he did so. I closed my eyes to endure the onslaught of him pounding inside me like a raging animal. I felt like a toy, dangling there for him to use as he liked, but still the searing pleasure of it all made me moan lustfully.

“Open those peepers, princess.” He commanded. “I want you to see exactly who’s in charge here.”

I opened my eyes and saw him grinning at me like a man possessed.

“You like this? You like me fucking you?” He growled, gripping my throat tighter.

All I could do was whimper and moan in response.

“I cuffed you and hung you up, hurt you, spat on you... even made you cry! And you still let me fuck you?” He laughed through shallow breaths. “You’re pathetic, you know that? A pathetic little whore.”

Jerome threw another slap at me and I felt myself tighten around his considerable length, taking him all deep inside me. He drove up into me like he was trying to break me open with his girth and I welcomed every inch of it.

“You’re so fucking tight.” He moaned.

I clenched my walls around him, the feeling of being filled by him sending flutters through me as he pushed in deeper and laughed.

“I don’t think your pussy ever wants to let me go, doll!” He grinned. “But I already know you like taking my cock like this, cause you’re such a good girl for me... I like that.”

I flushed at his words. I didn’t know why, but it made me feel good to please him and, in that moment, I would have done anything for him. I could feel my ecstasy creeping up on me, like magma rising inside a volcano. I cried out wantonly, the heat rising as he worked me, exploring every detail of my canal with his thick shaft.

He let go of my throat and moved both his hands to grab onto my ass and squeezed, steadying me so he could pound me harder and climb to release. His thrusts became erratic and sloppy and I could tell he was just as close as I was. I moaned loudly as he rammed into me harder and faster, burying himself deeper and making my arousal burn.

I could feel it coming, so close. I was about to boil over and all I needed was him. Just him. He continued thrusting like a raging animal, digging his nails into my flesh and scraping them along my ass, stinging sweetly. I whimpered at the sensation and tightened my legs.

“Cum for me, doll.” He panted. “I wanna feel you cum on my cock.”

He plunged into me, pushing the magma higher and just so close to bursting. It was coming. I could feel it.

He pounded again. So close. Again and again, so hard inside me. Just a little more...

I screamed out, closing my eyes and letting everything go. The feeling of my orgasm washed over me like a tidal wave of pure elation. My whole body shook from the force of it and I trembled like a leaf. Jerome continued to thrust into me until he too reached his climax. He growled like a beast and I felt him throb, releasing his hot load of sticky lust deep inside me.

We both relaxed, catching our breath and he stared down into my eyes. He unlatched his hands from the flesh of my ass and brought one round to gently stroke my cheek with his fingertips. It was quiet, but only for a minute.

He threw his head back and laughed like the madman he was, before pulling out of me and stepping back. My legs dropped to the floor and he began to put himself away and zip his trousers back up.

“Well, that was fantastic, dollface. Thanks for playing nice with me.” He said, throwing me a wink.

There was a loud metallic knock at the truck doors and I guessed whoever it was, was trying to get Jeromes attention.

“It’s been fun princess, really. But time waits for no man and I’ve got a party to attend” He said, smiling at me. “Well, more like crash.”

When he turned to leave, I tried to speak, but all that came out was intelligible muttering. He wasn’t going to leave me here, dangling, half naked and gagged like this? Was he? He began walking to the truck doors and I tried to call out.

“Oh! Wait, almost forgot.”

I felt a flood of relief when he began walking back to me.

“I’m gonna need this back.” He said and pulled the tie out of my mouth.

I was glad to finally be rid of it, but my joy was short lived, because he was starting to leave again.

“Hey...” I croaked; my mouth dry.

“Yeah, I’ll have someone come get you later.” He said, too nonchalantly for my liking. “For now, you can just... well, why don’t you just hang out?”

He laughed at his joke and opened the doors.

“Hey! You can’t leave me here!” I tried to shout, but my throat was too dry.

And then... he was gone. He really did just leave me alone, half naked in the back of a truck. How long would it be before someone found me? An hour? Two? The rest of the day?

All alone with my thoughts now, I decided the only thing to do now was wait. Wait and try and go over what the hell just happened between me and Jerome Valeska.

[spilledkauffie]

Still Having Nightmares

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader Word Count: 1.8k T/W: nightmares, trauma conversations, fluff A/N: MY HEART IS FUCKING BROKEN!!! Do you hear!? All because of this gif set— spoilers!

Song inspo: Nightmares - All Time Low

You squeezed your eyes closed, trying not to let the tears fall. But they weren’t for you— from outside the door, down the hall, and into the living room, you heard the soft mumbling. The desperate “no’s” and the heavy breathing. Rolling over in bed, you placed your hand where he often began the night, right next to you. Knowing he liked to fight this struggles alone, you methodically bit at the inside of your lip, furrowing your brows. 

However, when you heard the static of metal tension, you couldn’t ignore it any longer. Sitting up, you tossed the covers aside. Taking a moment to calm yourself, you quickly wiped the tears off your cheeks and took a deep breath, wanting to be in the best state to help him. Opening the bedroom door you stepped out into the hallway gently. Attempting to make your footsteps as light as possible, you made your way to the living room doorway. Bucky was laying on the opposite side of the apartment’s room from you. 

Watching him toss and turn, sometimes jolt, was difficult, but you always tried to think of how best to help him if you could. As you debated waking him up to end the night terror, something did that for you- hearing him yell your name he completely sat up. You blinked back some tears, hating that you knew his nightmares forced him to see himself losing more than he already had. 

“God-” he exhaled as if he had been forced to hold his breath for five minutes, it was a painful first few breaths. Shoving his hands through his hair, he set his elbows on his knees and tried to steady his breathing, he clearly hadn’t seen you yet, “shit,” you heard him say in a broken voice, though you couldn’t see them, you knew there were tears from the way he sniffled with an inhale every other breath. 

You shifted your weight onto the opposite foot, accidentally catching his attention.

“Hey,” he suddenly said as if nothing had happened, quickly turning his face away from you, rubbing the back of his hand against his eyes, trying to get rid of any proof of tears. Clearing his throat he exhaled, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

Tilting your head with a heavy sorrow that he just wanted to push everything aside, you reached for the light switch.

“No!” Bucky exclaimed, before looking down, surprised at his tone, “no,” he said softer, looking back up at you, “can we leave it off? Please?”

“Yeah,” you answered hoarsely, feeling a tightness in your own throat, “of course, baby.”

Walking over to where he was, you settled on the floor, sitting next to him, facing his direction. There was just enough light from the apartment windows for you two to see each other in dim lights streaming in. He tried again to subtly brush away any tear stains, while you joined him. Pushing the top of his wrist against his lip, he dropped his hand, and finally turned to you. 

“Did I-” he swallowed, you saw the tension in his jaw, “did I wake you?” 

“No,” you whispered, raising a hand to fluff back some fallen strands of his messy hair.

“Really?” he perked an eyebrow, “then why are you awake?” 

You hold your breath trying to think of an excuse, but you’d rather say nothing than lie to him again. 

“I didn’t mean to leave tonight, I just-” he quirked the corner of his lips, trying to find the right words, “I’m not used to it, but I didn’t want to leave- I just-”

“I know,” you assured him, free hand touching his forearm, calmly stroking his chilled skin.

He dipped his head shaking it, before giving a disappointed laugh, “you know I thought I was over this,” he admitted, your hand still brushing soothingly through his hair as he stared straight ahead, you swore you could see him thinking of another time. 

“Tell me about it?” 

He pressed his lips together, debating if he wanted to say more, so you let the quiet come between the two of you, and that was okay. Time was needed and you were more than willing to wait for him.

“You know sometimes I can see myself, at different times, and I just keep thinking- when I see that kid, signing up for the army, he looks at me,” he smiled for a second, but it faded faster than it came on, “he had no idea what he was signing up for.” Looking down to the metal replacing his arm, Bucky nodded to himself,  blaming himself for it all.

“Victims never do,” you said, “because it’s not their fault.”

“Victim?” He scoffed, raising his eyebrows in disbelief at you, “have you seen my count-”

“Bucky, what they did to you-”

“But what I did to others-” he started.

“What they did to you,” you repeated, more firmly, stopping him from interrupting you, he waited for your next words, “what they did was cruel and monstrous, but that doesn’t mean you are.” Bucky tilted his head, “you signed up because you’re a brave soldier, what came next was out of your control, but now, you’re back on the path you first started.”

His grey blue eyes were fixed on you when you finished, “tell me about tonight’s nightmare?”

He was quiet again, so you pressed your hand against the middle of his chest, covering his dog tags, before you curled your fingers around the metal and glanced down to study them in your palm. Rubbing your thumb over the raised letters- one tag spelling out his name the other simply saying “Winter Soldier,” you bit the corner of your lip. Bucky never took his gaze off you, studying you studying the tags. 

After a moment of silence, he leaned in closer, slipping his hand against the side of your neck, fingertips pushing into the roots of your hair at the nape of your neck, while he brought his mouth to the opposite side. You tightened your hand around his dog tags as his skin brushed against your knuckles. With the way his chest was already rising and falling and the hum of his moan against your neck, you almost got lost in it. Slowly moving his other hand up your thigh, to your hip, you felt the metal, smooth and cold as ever. Closing your eyes, you focussed for a moment on his hot desperate kisses, his lips felt so good against you, but you knew what he was doing.

“Bucky-” you said softly, but seriously, knowing what you needed to do.

“Mhmm?” he hummed, lips ghosting against you as he waited for you to continue, but when you didn’t, he pulled back to look at you, his hand still caressing the nape of your neck gently.

You stared at him, amazed at how well he was trained to shift from emotion to emotion or just hide them altogether. It seemed wrong that there was so much pain and hurt in you form sympathy when he was the one actually fighting through it. As you stayed silent, his gaze fell to your parted lips. Bucky took his opportunity and met your mouth with a deeply passionate kiss, when you hardly responded he paused the kiss, lips still touching yours as he spoke.

“What is it?” he asked, caressing your cheek.

“I love you so much,” you took a deep breath, placing your hand on top of his and bringing it away from your cheek setting your interlaced hands in your lap, looking back to him, “but that won’t make them go away,” you stated eyebrows knitted together, shaking your head softly, “I need you to talk to me,” you stroked his jawline with your thumb, still holding his hand with your other, and speaking as gently as you possibly could, “so we can work this out together, I want to help you, I want you to be able to stay a whole night with me.”

Taking his hand off your thigh, you heard the metal adjust as he shifted his weight onto it.  

“Alright, in my nightmares. . .I keep hurting you,” his words broke the silence, “different ways, I tell myself it’s not me, it’s that shadow I used to be, but all the same in the end.” 

Listening carefully you placed a soft kiss to the cooled skin of his shoulder, where the scars met metal, encouraging him to continue with gentle stroking motions of your fingertips on the back of his hand. 

“Every time. . .I’m in a place from my past, but you’re there,” he confessed, tightening his grip around your hand, “and you die, all because of me.”

“You’d never hurt me.”

“But I did...I do,” tears were returning and he didn’t understand; the one happiness in his life was being twisted by his past and his mind, he remembered certain things, others a blur and now past and present were blending. . . 

“James,” you brought him to face you with your hand against his cheek, “you’d never hurt me.”

“I’m just-” he said cautiously.

“Bucky,” you said almost disappointed he’d question himself on this.

“I’m just scared I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from hurting you,” he confessed in a louder voice than intended, making you jerk back, but keeping your hand in his helped ground him, “I’m sorry,” he said, calming himself down. 

You could see the tears falling even if he didn’t want you to see them.

“There’s no chance of that happening,” you pressed your forehead against his, “I know you, Bucky, you love me.”

 “But you’ve seen it, if- if someone knows those words- with that book- they reset me and I can’t-” 

You heard him exhale, heavy with pain and hurt and panic. His chest began to rapidly rise and fall. 

“Bucky, Darling,” you moved yourself closer and brought your arms around him, to which he responded by wrapping his around your frame, pulling you even closer, and burying his face against your neck, “it’s okay, we’re okay.”

Feeling his hot tears against your neck, and his erratic breathing, you tilted your head up, trying not to cry yourself. Stroking across the back of his bare shoulders, you softly combed your fingers through his hair, embracing him against you. It wasn’t easy for him to show this much emotion and you could sense that, staggering breath and long periods of tension, as if he was trying to hold it all back. Feeling him tighten his hug and squeeze his eyes closed, you just held him to let him know it was okay.

“We’ll get through this, I promise,” you whispered, “no one is ever coming near you with that book ever again, and if they do. . . now they’ll have to get through me first.”

Pulling away from you just enough to press his forehead back against yours he smiled softly, staying there for a moment, “how’d you get so tough, huh?”

“I live with a fighter,” you smiled back, “he’s taught me to survive just about anything,” he gave a small laugh with his smile spreading, “so together,” you stole a kiss, “I know we’re unstoppable.”

[forever-rogue]

Oblivious

A/N | This is just a little sweet fluff with Buckaroo. It’s also a late little happy birthday for @falcor-thee-luck-dragon! I hope you (and everyone else) enjoys!

Summary | You’d think Bucky wouldn’t be so oblivious but...he was. 

Pairing | Bucky x Fem!Reader

Word Count | 3.9k

Warnings | language

Masterlists | Bucky, Main

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

James Buchanan Barnes aka Bucky Barnes was a man of many talents and had a vast knowledge of a variety of things. Sometimes, however, things were so obvious and clear that they went right over his head. You could hit him in the face with a 2x4 and he wouldn’t know what happened oblivious. Like the fact that you, his girlfriend of almost a year, had the strange and peculiar ability to communicate with animals. You’d never hid it, nor explicitly told him about it, thinking it would be funny to see how long it would take him to catch on. 330 days (and counting) in and he hadn’t.

Bucky grabbed his phone, scrolling through his social media feeds quickly before pulling up Spotify and turning to his secret indulgence playlist - classical Italian Opera. Yeah. It was just a thing he had happened to really like for no particular reason. The only other living souls in his apartment with him were Archie, your black and white speckled mutt and Alpine, Bucky’s snow white cat. You were currently out of town for work and had asked Bucky if he minded watching Archie, to which he had of course said yes. It was no secret that Archie loved Bucky almost as much as you and vice versa - he was the goodest boy as Bucky had proclaimed. Plus, the cat and dog got along like they were old best friends. 

Trailing into the bathroom, he stripped off his t-shirt and pajama pants as Archie laid on the bed and offered him a dismissal look. Alpine was tucked into his side as she slept soundly, paying no attention to her owner. 

As he turned on the shower and let the water warm up, he finished stripping off his clothes before deciding to sing along with his music as best as he could. Bucky didn’t speak Italian. It showed. But he was passionate about giving it all as he got ready to take on the day. Archie groaned as Bucky hit a particularly high note, burying his face under the soft duvet. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“You ever gonna ask her the question?” Sam raised an eyebrow at Bucky as the two men walked alongside the creek. Bucky had decided that ice cream and a walk for Archie were called for, so he’d taken advantage of the nice weather and gone outside. Missing your company, despite you only having been gone for a few days, he’d called up Sam and convinced him to meet up. Not that it took much convincing; the men were as thick as thieves, no matter how much they denied it. Co-workers, partners - best friends. 

“Umm,” Bucky’s eyes widened as he almost choked on his ice cream, awkwardly coughing to cover up his nerves. Sam just snickered in response as he realized he already had his answer. After a moment he slowly nodded, “I have the ring...it’s been sitting in the sock drawer.”

“Sock drawer,” Sam snorted and shook his head as a flush of red colored Bucky’s neck and ears, “classic. When are you going to do it?”

“I don’t know,” Bucky sighed as he broke off a piece of waffle cone and handed it to Archie, who had been listening in very intently, “I want to...but what if it’s too soon. We technically don’t even live together yet-”

“Doesn’t she like to spend her time at yours? She’s practically moved in...most of the stuff at your place is hers anyway,” Sam reminded him as Bucky made a small, noncommittal sound. It was true - when you’d first met Bucky his place had been minimal and bare. Now, with your time and touch, it felt like a home; a home you had lovingly built with him. Sam bumped Bucky’s shoulder with his, “just get it all done in one swoop. She’ll say yes.”

Archie made a small sound, agreeing with Sam as he rubbed his snout against Bucky’s thigh. He visibly relaxed as he nodded, hoping that this would be enough to psych him up, “I’ll think about it-”

“No thinking about it,” Sam tutted gently, “you’re going to do it. You’ve been a fool - a straight up head over heels in love fool - since you’ve met her. You’re going to ask.”

“Sam…”

“How long have you had the ring?”

“Sam.”

“Bucky.”

“A few weeks after we started dating,” Bucky cast his glance at the ground as warmth flushed up in his cheeks. He’d expected Sam to burst out in laughter, but luckily the other man said nothing, but a smile stretched across his features, “it seems so silly but you know..I just felt like I knew.”

“Sometimes you do,” Sam agreed, putting his arm around his shoulder and pulling him for a quick hug, “you just gotta do it, Buck. She won’t say no.”

Archie barked in response, looking between the two men, wagging his tail excitedly. Sam offered him a few pets before nodding in response.

“She comes home in a few days,” he couldn’t wait to pick you up from the airport and have you jump into his arms while he finally got to hold you again, “I’ve got until then to pluck up the courage.”

“Just don’t lay it on her right away…” Sam snorted as he picked Bucky running up to you immediately pouring his heart out to you. Not a good idea, “give her a moment to be calm and breath.”

“Shut up,” Bucky huffed as he finished the rest of his ice cream, “I’ve got this!”

“We’re all counting on that!”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Bucky set the empty popcorn bowl back on the coffee table as he tried not to sniffle too loudly. His eyes were misty and burning with unshed tears as he watched whatever cheesy romance he had randomly selected. He pulled the soft blanket he was curled up in higher, savoring the fact that it still managed to have a faint bit of your smell on it. Alpine was curled up on the back of the couch, snoozing away while Archie was laying next to him, his head resting on Bucky’s thigh. He was on and off sleeping, but had peeped open an eye when he first heard Bucky sniffle. 

“They’re in love,” he whispered gently, unsure if he was speaking to himself or talking to his furry companions. He was scratching Archie’s ears as he watched the scenes play out on the screen, “but they can’t be together. Their families would never allow it.”

Archie huffed lightly as he burrowed further into Bucky’s touch. It was the first time he’d seen the man get so emotional over the movie. Bucky had feelings, plenty of them, of course, but there was something about the movie he’d picked, combined with how much he was missing you that caused him to just lose it. It was like the dam had burst and his emotions were out of control.

He sat back and watched the rest of the movie in silence, a few tears running down his cheeks as he watched the love story play out. By the end of the movie, Archie was fully in his lap and Alpine was resting on his chest, “he left everything behind for her, so they could start a new life together far away. They really were next to meant to be together. It’s beautiful.”

The furry little ones were absolutely  going to tell you about this. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Archie yawned and slowly stretched before hopping down from the couch and heading towards Bucky’s bedroom. He tried to nose the door open as he learned to do, but was stopped when he found that it was closed all the way. His head tilted in curiosity and whined softly as he tried to see if Bucky was awake so he would let him in. 

As soon as he did, the dog regretted it. All he could hear coming from inside was the soft sounds coming from Bucky. Soft moans and sounds and gentle whispers of your name. His eyes widened as the dog took off down the hall and ran back into the living room, flopping down on his dog bed and cuddling up to Alpine as he tried to empty his mind. All the poor dog had wanted to do was to sleep in the big soft bed - not be scarred for life. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Bucky!” as soon as you’d gotten cleared and walked through arrivals and gotten your single bag, you’d kept your eyes peeled for Bucky. It didn’t take long to find him, standing near the back, blue eyes scanning the arrivals with a hopeful little smile on his face. You almost dropped your bag as you ran over to him. As soon as you were in arm’s reach, you dropped everything to the ground, and Bucky effortlessly scooped you up in his arms. You threw your arms around his neck as he held you in a tight embrace, “James. I’ve missed you so much.”

“I missed you too,” he sighed in content, happy to have you in his arms once again. Everything about you set his soul on fire, as he held onto you as tightly as possible. After a moment, he slowly set you back down, but not before peppering your face in gentle kisses, “you’re so beautiful.”

“Bucky,” you reached up and gently touched his cheek, “you’re too much. I’m so glad to be home.”

“Not quite yet.”

“Sure I am,” you insisted quietly, “I’m here with you. You’re my home, Bucky.”

The small velvet box was practically burning a hole in his pocket as you looked at him like he was everything - your whole world (he was). Unable to form a proper sentence, he  grabbed your face and pulled you close to him, crashing his lips onto yours, kissing you like you weren’t in the middle of a crowded airport. He could feel you smiling against his lips, reluctantly breaking apart from you only once you were both breathless. 

“What was that for?” you asked shyly, feeling your face flush with warmth as he picked up your bags for you. You were watching him with pure adoration as he reached for your hand and laced your fingers together. 

“Nothing,” he shrugged softly, “jus’ missed you is all, pretty girl.”

“I missed you too, Bucky,” you promised, “I love you.”

“I love you more than all the moon and stars, pretty girl.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“What?” you asked as Archie came into the kitchen and sat down, watching you intently as you finished up the cookies you had been working. Bucky was busy with Sam that afternoon, so you’d decided to make a little sweet treat for both of you. You’d been home for a few days and fallen into an easy routine, having opted to stay with Bucky for the time being rather than going back to your own place, “you’ve got something to say, I can tell.”

Just missed you. I like when you’re home, you and Bucky. And Alpine. 

“I missed you too, buddy,” you promised, leaning over to his head a gentle pet, “did you have fun while I was gone?”

Yes. Bucky takes good care of me. I like Alpine too. She’s nice.

“I happen to like them a lot too,” you grinned at your friend, “I’m glad you do too. I think...I really love him, Archie. I think, no, I know - he’s the one.”

He thinks so too. He told Sam you’re the one - and us too. 

“Really?” you almost dropped the cookies you were plating up in surprise as you bit the inside of your cheek to keep from squealing in excitement, “you’re not messing with me, are you?”

It’s true. He’s got...well, you’ll see. He likes romance movies apparently. And singing opera.

“Oh?”

He was watching a movie. He ate two bowls of popcorn and cried. He let me and Alpine sit on him though so it was okay. He sings opera when he showers in the morning. He’s not good but he tries.

“Archie! Don’t be a meanie,” you chuckled as you tried to picture the scene. It would have been hilarious to see. You’d always known Bucky had a soft side, you just didn’t know how soft, “but I will remember that and use it to my advantage when I want to watch a cheesy movie.”

Please do. He gives good pets when he’s in that mood. He always gives good pets.

“He’s a good man,” you grinned as you reached over the counter for a good treat that you easily tossed to him, “I really love him.”

He really loves you. One night I...never mind.

“No, no,” you shook your head as you waggled another treat at him, “out with it! Or I’ll hide all of your treats!”

Fine. But you didn’t hear it from me - I wanted to sleep in the big bed one night and the door was closed and I heard him. He was...saying your name.

Your brows narrowed in confusion for a moment as you pulled another treat out and twirled it in your fingers for a moment. Then you hit you, what he had meant, “oh. Oh. That is...good to know, I suppose.”

Not for me. I just wanted to sleep, not...hear that.

“Sorry buddy,” you snorted as you handed him another treat, “that will stay between us. Besides...he still doesn’t know we can communicate. I wonder if he’ll ever put two and two together?”

You could just tell him.

“But where’s the fun in that?” you teased as the door opened and Bucky walked in, a giant grin on his face. You looked at Archie and shot him a wink before turning to Bucky, “hello, my love. You’re just in time! Cookies are done and cooled!”

“Oh, my sweet girl,” Bucky came over and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips before petting Archie, “I love you. Is someone here? I could have sworn you were talking to someone…”

“Nope,” you (half) lied, covering up with a brilliant smile, “just me and the dog and cat.”

“Oh,” he shrugged, thinking it was just his imagination, “what’s all this? Cookies -  whatever for?”

“Just because I love you,” you grinned as Archie groaned and laid down, “both of you!”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

You stopped for a moment to catch your breath as you reached one of the peaks of the small mountain you and Bucky were hiking. It was a glorious day so you’d decided there was no better plan than to get out and enjoy nature. He had no problem at any point, even offering to piggy back you when you’d grown tired; you’d just defiantly stuck your tongue out at the super soldier and carried on. 

“This view is absolutely breathtaking,” you looked over the small cliff, admiring the tranquil expanse of the woods in front of you. Bucky was at your side, his eyes on you the entire time.

“Yeah,” he agreed with a grin, “it’s pretty amazin’.”

“Bucky,” you turned around and rolled your eyes at him as he pulled you in for a kiss, causing you to break into a fit of giggles, “I’m all gross and sweaty!”

“Don’t care,” he insisted as his hands found purchase on your waist and pulled you closer against him, his lips already ghosting over yours, “jus’ want you, baby.”

“Bucky,” his name was soft on your lips, but before anything else could happen, you were stopped by a small, almost nervous little voice from up above. 

Umm, hi! I don’t want to interrupt but…

You pulled back from Bucky for a moment before looking at the tree, where you found a small squirrel sitting on a branch and watching you both. Bucky was surprised for a moment but calmed when you gave his shoulder a squeeze and gently moved past him and towards your new friend.

“Hi,” you smiled at her and offered a smile, picking up an acorn and handing it over to her, “is everything alright?”

Oh yes. I just wanted to let you know there’s a big group of people coming. If you want some privacy you should go somewhere more secluded! They’re pretty loud, I don’t like big groups.

“Oh!” you giggled as you could only imagine the awkward scenario if you’d been caught, “thanks for the heads up! We’ll definitely get out of here. I’m sorry you have to deal with all the noise.”

It’s okay. I’m going back to my nest now! If you go down the hill, there’s a more private path that leads back down the mountain. There’s signs if you need them.

“Why thank you,” you grinned as you reached up and she let you pet her, “you’ve been very helpful. Maybe one day we’ll see each other again.“

No problem. I hope so too! Thank you for the acorn!

“Anytime,” you promised as she scurried away with her new treasure. You shook your head in amusement as you turned back around to Bucky, to find him watching you with wide eyes. He wasn’t quite sure what had just happened, almost wondering if he was hallucinating. Had you just gone mad and tried to speak to a squirrel? You laughed lightly at the shocked look on his features,  “oh.”

“What was...what was that?” he asked as you rejoined him and pressed a kiss to his cheek. His eyes were still scanning the branch the small squirrel had just occupied. 

“She was just warning us that there’s a group of hikers coming our way and we should find someplace more private,” you said as if it was no big deal. It didn’t help Bucky in the slightest.

“She? A warning...how….That was a squirrel!”

“I was wondering if you’d ever put two and two together,” you laughed, almost doubling over in laughter, “I...Bucky, I don’t know how or why but I can communicate with animals.”

“You can….how long?!”

“Ever since I’ve been a child?” you held up your hands in earnest, “its something I’ve always been able to do. I don’t advertise it, obviously because people generally think I’m crazy, but I would think you of all people understand. It’s just been...fun to wait and see if you’d ever figure it out.”

“All those times…” he ran a hand over his face in exasperation and disbelief as you watched him in amusement. He was a brilliant, smart man but sometimes he was so oblivious. You couldn’t love him anymore if you tried, “it wasn’t just...a one sided conversation. It all makes sense now. Wow, that’s amazing! What a wonderful thing to possess.”

“I’ve always liked it,” you agreed, “it’s different, you know? But special in its own way.”

“Wait…” he mused for a moment, “so all those times...oh. H-how much have Archie and Alpine told you? Have they always talked to you?”

“Yup,” you crossed your arms over your chest, as you watched his neck and ears turn red, “those two in particular are very animated and over the top. They’re the worst little gossip duo. Almost like you and Sammy.”

“Of course they are,” he groaned as you reached for his hand and pulled him towards. He gave you a sheepish grin as you pressed a light kiss to his knuckles, “they told you about the movie, huh?”

“Archie,” you confirmed, “but he did say you gave him the best pets.”

“Did he tell about...oh no,” this time his whole face was a brilliant crimson, “I-I…”

“Oh stop,” you teased, “I’m flattered and honored. It’s not like I don’t do the same when I’m not with you.”

“Really?” he perked up with pride as you just nodded in amusement, “well then. Wait - did he tell you about Sam?”

“He said you went on a walk with him but that was it,” you shrugged, “nothing really. I do know that he loves you and Alpine very much. And so do I, obviously.”

“Okay,” he relaxed slightly as you took his hand and started to lead him towards the more secluded path your little squirrel had told you about. The box in his pocket was once again burning a hole, “good.”

“Everything okay, Bub?” you asked as he just nodded, lips pursed as he fell into step behind you. Something was definitely off, but you weren’t going to push him on it. If anything, you knew he’d come around and speak his mind about what was going on. He usually always did. 

A silence, one neither tense nor uncomfortable, fell over the two of you as you walked down the quiet trail. It was beautiful - lush greenery and newly bloomed plants everywhere. At one point you stopped and pulled out your phone to take a few pictures of the natural beauty. Bucky had been so lost in his own thoughts, his heart practically pounding in his chest and consuming every part of him that he almost bowled into you and knocked you over. 

“James!” it was somewhere between a groan and laugh as he caught you in his arms in order to keep you from tumbling into a bunch of bushes. You were face to face with Bucky, looking at him intently as he steadied you,  “alright, something’s up. Come on - out with it. You know you can tell me anything.”

“I umm...marry me?” all the speeches he had gone over and planned wet out the window as he just stared at you with nervous eyes. You’d been so taken aback by his sudden question that you took a step back and gave him a curious expression. Bucky’s stomach was in absolute knots as he wondered if he’d just fucked everything up.

“W-what?” your voice was a small squeak, as you tried to see if he was just pulling your leg. But his gaze never wavered, “what did you just ask me?”

“I…” he stopped over a moment before reaching into his pocket with trembling hands and pulling out a small box. Your eyes widened in response as you realized that was not joking at all, further evidenced when he popped it open and showed you the ring inside. Your mouth dropped open when it all came together, “I thought the whole proposal would go a lot differently than this but umm...yeah. Will you marry me? That’s what I’m trying to ask...I’m glad Archie hadn’t spoiled that for you.”

“No,” you shook your head as you already felt tears pricking at your eyes, “he definitely didn’t. I thought he might have been holding something back, but I...I had no idea.”

“I know it hasn’t even been a year yet, but I feel like when you know someone 's the one..you know,” he admitted softly, “and I know you’re the one. The one I want to spend the rest of my life with, the one I want to call my wife...my everything.”

“James,” you looked between him and the ring a few more times before swallowing the lump in your throat, “gods, I am so in love with you. There was never a doubt in my mind that it was meant to be you. Yes, of course yes.”

“Really?!”

“Of course,” you beamed at him, “I love you, Bucky. You’re my forever.”

“Forever,” he breathed softly, “I like the sound of that.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

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[houseofhurricane]

when the stars throw down their shields

Summary: The war is over, and so Ruhn and Lidia get matching tattoos.

Pairing: Ruhn/Lidia

Word Count: 2,268

This fic was written for @daynightweek and inspired by a gorgeous piece of art by megcankindadraw, which you can see here. I commissioned it, but she did all the hard work! Please give her a follow on Instagram.

If you’d prefer, you can read this fic on Archive of Our Own.

It takes six tattoo shops before anyone will take on the pieces Ruhn has designed for Lidia. At first he thinks it's the complexity of the design or the difficulty of placing the flowers on her arm just so, but after three shops, Ruhn sees the tightness in the artists' faces when they look at her. Watches Lidia raise her chin as if she sees none of it.

Her mind is roiling after they step out into the street, though. He takes her hand.

"This was a stupid idea," he says. "You don't need to change anything about you."

She makes a rueful little sound that's too elegant to be considered a snort. "You say that as if you don't know how many people I've killed."

"You were fighting a war," he says, words he truly means now that he knows the depth of her cover, the scope of the plans she was key in unleashing. And then, because he can tell, just from the cant of her head, that she doesn't quite believe him, he adds, "We wouldn't have won without you."

Lidia shakes her head, a strand of her golden hair falling into her face. She always wears it loose now, the chignon abandoned with the torque on the battlefield, though despite her white silk blouse and jeans, she still moves with the immaculate bearing that marks her instantly as the Hind.

And for all that she was, in fact, critical in saving them all, the bullet holes and bomb craters in Lunathion, all the times she'd appeared sneering on their televisions, have made it difficult for most people to hear a new story, even if it's true.

But Ruhn faced down his father for nearly a century.

"We get to live the life we want," he tells her, wrapping his arm around her waist and leading her to another tattoo shop.

"We should have moved to the forest. We could tattoo ourselves," she says, each word clipped as they leave the sixth shop. It's that tone that tells Ruhn that this is not just a moment, but something larger. That they need to keep going.

Because now that the war has ended, Lidia has mostly been remote, too composed. Inside her mind, though, there is a locked room, marble overlaying titanium, and though he gives her space, Ruhn can sense the agony behind it. Now, he can detect just a fragment of that feeling in her voice.

"The ink would come out blotchy," he tells her, gently pulling her along. “Don't ask me how I know."

"I've seen that tattoo on your thigh." The barest hint of a smile on her lips. And it doesn't matter, not for a second, that she's laughing at him. Just as long as she keeps going. "I thought that was Finn's work."

He groans. "I'd trust Finn to save my life before I'd trust him with a needle."

She reaches out for his hand even while he realizes the words aren't an exaggeration, that Finn has in fact saved his life twice over the past year. That he'll wear the scars of both of those days forever.

There are some rooms in his mind that stay locked, too.

He raises Lidia's hand to his mouth, kisses her knuckles.

"We can be happy, Day," he says.

"You deserve it," she says, and he knows from her eyes that she's thinking of the Asteri dungeons, the things she had to do to keep them alive. To keep him from losing his mind with pain. He feels that door in her mind open just a fraction wider.

"You do too."

There are people staring but people have stared at Ruhn his whole life, and he thinks fuck it as he pulls Lidia into his arms. Her lips are soft and he licks them open, kisses her until her breath is ragged.

"You saved the day as much as Bryce or Hunt," he tells her, the words low and true. A variation of the words he's told her dozens of times before, when she wakes in the night, the only time her composure breaks. Until now. "And you had us all on your shoulders for years."

"I see their faces," she says, her fingers splaying in the air. "All of them, and I think -- what if there had been another way, and I was too weak to see it?"

He knows that this moment is major if she's speaking like this in the open. Lidia never makes confessions without a locked door between the two of them and the rest of the world. And even then, those confessions only happened in moments of desperation, when one of both of them thought they might not live much longer.

"You see their faces because you're not a monster." He meets her eyes and does not look away, even while his thumb traces the curve of her bottom lip.

 "You can be happy."

She nods, her expression unchanged, and then she takes his hand. He's not sure what she's thinking until he realizes that she's leading him to the next tattoo shop, the one she researched herself.

The artists aren't warm at first, but they're courteous, and when Ruhn and Lidia reveal their designs, there's a younger witch whose eyes light up at the challenge.

Her name is Phoebe, she tells them as she looks at their drawings, maps them out on Lidia's skin and then Ruhn's. She tells Lidia in a whisper that she saved her cousin and her queen, too, and she is grateful.

Lidia thanks her with an elegant nod, then extends her arm towards the needle. He holds Lidia's hand as Phoebe inks her arm with flowers, gritting his own teeth against the tattoo on his shoulder, a sun the color of the flames that hid her when they first met. He wraps his arms around her while Phoebe prepares for Lidia's second tattoo, lets his mate lean against his chest.

Later, when it's healed, he'll run his fingers over the crescent moon on Lidia's hip, and she'll call him Night in that voice he knows so well. It will take him no time at all to make her wordless and moaning as he touches her.

Now, she looks up at him with those golden eyes that seem to look straight into his soul, and, in his mind, she asks, What if I was never made for peace?

It's a question she's never asked him. He sees the tears in her eyes for the first time and he knows that now, months after the war has finally ended, a part of her is breaking. 

But Ruhn is not afraid. Because he doesn't think that she is broken. Only that she is becoming something new, something that this fucking world had never let her be before. Perhaps the person she would have been, if she'd been born into a world at peace. Or maybe she'll become the person Lidia could only become after becoming a monster in order to bring down the Asteri and save them all.

In his mind, his star-flecked hands hold her tight and she sobs against his neck, her grip on him as tight as her iron will.

You were meant to make a better world, he says, into her shining hair, her fire-bright skin. You don't have to do anything else unless you want to.

I'm not going to become a pool shark, if that's what you're implying. The tears limn her words and he pulls her closer, so that he feels each of her breaths in his own body.

There can only be one in every family.

Even without seeing her, he knows she's smiling, and when he opens her eyes, into the everyday world, the muscles of her face have relaxed despite the needle on her hip.

Still, a moment later, she frowns again.

"I hurt you," she says aloud, the words so vehement that the shop goes quiet. Ruhn can feel the weight of at least a dozen eyes, even as he can almost scent the blood, the fear and desperation of the dungeons. Feel the blunted pain that Lidia inflicted on Rigelus' orders, bearable only because she went into his mind and relieved the worst of it.

She hadn't been able to keep her own pain at harming him out of her eyes. In his worst moments, that had been the only thing that tethered Ruhn to reality.

"You saved me," he says, loud enough so that everyone can hear. Even if she hadn't risked everything to break him out of the Eternal City, alongside Hunt and Baxian, it still would be the truth. Since that first meeting with Agent Daybright, something's changed in him.

He can see her fighting his words, her mouth pulled tight into a line, until finally something seems to register. The fact that, at minimum, she can tell him whatever she wants without the fear of pain.

Ruhn hates that it isn't a given, for her, even if he's well acquainted with that feeling.

"I would do it all so differently, if I could do it again." Her fingers interlace with his as she says the words.

"I wouldn't," he says, bending to kiss the crown of her head. "I'd want to make sure I was still with you, in the end."

She sighs but does not argue, holds tight against his fingers as Phoebe shades the colors of Lidia's tattoo, the moon and the flowers that match the ink on Ruhn's arms. As if they were always meant to fit together.

The tattoos are healed and perfect, have gone viral on Phoebe's social media accounts, before she fully believes all the things he's told her. Before she really begins to think about what comes next for her, for both of them. 

But now, as Phoebe continues the tattoo, laying in the colors, she begins to talk about her cousin. How Lidia found her in a prison camp and realized her powers, what she could be. The daring rescue that Merga described weeks after she returned, still unsure who she could trust, still not sure if the Hind would find her.

"Then, of course, you saved Queen Hypaxia," she says, "though I suppose she doesn't have the title anymore."

None of them do, now, and it's been a relief, for Ruhn, to no longer be the crown prince. Even if people might always stare at him.

"My sister will always be a queen in spirit," Lidia responds, reaching out for Phoebe's shoulder. It's a daring gesture, given the needle in Phoebe's hands, but then, Lidia has always taken risks no one else could stomach.

Phoebe does not falter for a second, though.

"And I don't think you were ever as horrible as everyone thought," she says.

 "Because Merga wasn't so important to anyone but our family. Even with her powers. Only someone good would go through all the bother to save her."

"Don't say that." Lidia's words come out a sob.

"She's right," Ruhn says, cupping her shoulders with his palms, bracing her tight against him. Reminding her that he's here.

She shakes against him for a moment, then another, letting the sobs tear through her, and then Phoebe sets down the needle and takes Lidia's hand, holds it lightly between her tattooed fingers.

"You're going to have to come back for a touch up," Phoebe says, "and I'll tell you all of this again if you need to hear it."

Lidia draws a shuddering breath and nods, then relaxes just slightly against Ruhn's chest.

"Thank you," she says, the words clotting in her throat, and then, "I'm sorry." Phoebe only tells her that people often cry here and offers her a tissue.

Though there are tears on Lidia's cheeks for the following hour as Phoebe finishes her work, her mind is open to him, her shoulders a little more relaxed.

 He holds her tight and lets her breathe.

What do I do next? Lidia's voice is tear-choked even in her mind. As if decades of pain are washing over her.

You let Phoebe finish and then you walk home with me.

And then?

And then I take care of you.

You're just going to take care of me indefinitely? That's a terrible plan.

In that place between their minds, he kisses her, his impatient Lidia, feels the life in her returning, the pain and the hope and the small spark of happiness returning.

Good thing you can come up with a better one, he says, the words filled with his love for her, the only thing that carried him through his darkest moments. The light of her shines before him. One day at a time is all we need.

I think I can manage that. As long as you don't make me drink another beer. Then we'll stop by the liquor store and buy a case of the wine you like. That doesn't sound so terrible.

You're supposed to pick Bryce and Athalar up tomorrow morning, she says, only a slight hesitation on Hunt's name. The train from Nidaros gets in early.

So we have a plan through tomorrow at noon.

After the train?

You're taking me out for brunch if I'm battling my sister and her mate with a wine hangover.

In his mind, in the tattoo shop, all around Ruhn, Lidia is laughing, and there's no artifice in the sound, no concealment.

Yeah? she asks, curling her fingers around his, resurrecting that old joke, from long before they could imagine where their love might lead.

Yeah.

Notes: Believe it or not, this was supposed to be fluff. Maybe one day I'll write something other than angst featuring Ruhn and Lidia.

That said, there will definitely be more DayNight fics from me, because right now I'm obsessed with figuring out how they get from the end of HOSAB to this point. It might take a while but I'm trying to make it happen.

The title of this fic is derived from one of the later stanzas of The Tyger by William Blake.

As always, thank you so much for reading 🧡

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[whimsicallyreading]

For Rowaelin Month day 17

 “A sick day”

CW- PTSD, mentions of violence

Aelin considered herself a fortunate person.

She has survived genocide, her family's murders, losing loved ones, slavery, torture, and the Great War. Now she is a queen, a mother, a beloved Mate.

Her life had changed since those bleak days where she'd wondered if she would ever escape captivity—the days when Aelin didn't know if she would ever be free or find love again. Every morning she woke up curled into Rowan's side, and while she drank her morning tea, Aelin could count on her young daughter snuggling into her lap.

Yes, she was swamped most days, but that was normal for a queen. But even the moments between boring meetings brimmed with life and laughter. Rowan's hand on her thigh beneath the table. Fenrys' theatrics when conversation spiraled off-topic. And even the hardened lords thought it was hilarious when their three-year-old princess barged into councils and demanded her mother's attention.

Her family gathered for dinners at the end of every day. Aelin's little family, Fenrys, Emrys, and Malakai were the regular attendees. Aedion, Lysandra, Elide, and Lorcan joined when they were present. It was a time reserved for family only, and it was by far Aelin's favorite part of the day.

Aelin had a good life now. Her family was growing, and her country thrived beneath her rule.

So it always took her by surprise when a bad day came.

She had woken up fine. Delly had slammed open the chamber door with a gust of wind and squirmed herself between her and Rowan in the early morning. Usually, Aelin treasured the moments when her daughter joined them, but being pregnant again had taken a toll on her sleep.

Rowan tried to stop their child before she entirely collapsed onto Aelin but was a moment too slow. Delly flopped onto her mother's chest in a disarray of wrinkled nightgown and golden curls. Soft sobs were sputtering out of the tiny figure.

I'm sorry. Rowan whispered into her thoughts. He knew how hard pregnancy was on her and took his mate's comfort very seriously. It troubled him that their toddling daughter woke Aelin so abruptly.

Aelin blinks the sleep from her eyes and sends him a happy smile to assure him everything is fine.

"What's wrong, Dell?" Aelin soothes a hand up her baby's quaking form.

Adelia sniffles harder, unable to talk through the tears. She'd started to have bad dreams in recent weeks, but never had she been so inconsolable.

Aelin shifts as Adelia's arms tighten uncomfortably around her bump. Rowan sees her discomfort and reaches around to pull Dell to him instead, but it is met with resistance.

"No," Adelia finally wails. "Mama. I want Mama."

Rowan frowns. Adelia was a daddy's girl to the bone, and this was the first time she'd ever refused to go to him. Their daughter squeezes harder and burrows her face into Aelin's torso.

"Dell," Rowan leans next to her and whispers, a cool breeze brushing against her flushed cheek. "What's wrong little love?"

Adelia lifts her head, and Aelin's heart contracts painfully. Her cheeks are red and swollen from the intensity of her crying, little sobs still stumbling from her chest as Rowan settles her down enough to speak.

"Mama was gone. She was hurt, and she couldn't see me." Dell sniffles, her green eyes glassy. "Can you see me, Mama?"

Aelin tugs her daughter in closer, unable to stand the sight of her so sad. "Yes, of course, I can. I'm right here."

"You were in a box. She wouldn't let me see you," Adelia whimpers in a small voice. "She told me she was gonna keep you. I don't want you to go, Mama."

Aelin's face blanches. It wasn't possible. Her little baby couldn't possibly have seen what was coming to her mind. She looks at Rowan, and his face is pinched with worry.

"It's not real, Dell." Rowan uses a thumb to wipe the tears off her cheek.

Adelia flinches. "Uncle Ress told me it was. He told me Mama had got stollen and put into a box by the bad lady and that she should have stayed there."

Aelin's heart stops. Nausea crawls up her throat, and Rowan tugs Adelia away just in time for her to crawl out of bed and gag into a potted plant. The sickness grips Aelin, the shudders in her arms only growing worse with her daughter's mumbled cries.

"Daddy, I want Mama to stay here." Rowan hushes her and murmurs quiet reassurances. "Don't let her get stollen."

Ress had said that? In front of her daughter? Aelin tries to close her eyes against the visions creeping into her mind. The places her scars used to be ache, and her hands pulse with the remembered pain of reconstruction.

The baby in her womb squirms under its mother's stress, and Aelin throws up again.

She should have stayed there.

Cairn brings the hammer down onto her frail knees, the ringing of cracking bone splits the air.

She should have stayed there.

Aelin opens her eyes to endless darkness. Sweet smoke wafts through invisible holes and sends her to sleep- leaving her mind vulnerable to Maeve's manipulations.

She should have stayed there.

More and more memories swarm behind her eyelids until a pair of grounding arms wrap around her shoulders.

"Fireheart, you are home. You are safe. Can you breathe with me?" Rowan sighs loudly behind her shoulder, and Aelin tries to force her own breath out.

Breathing in is harder, but Rowan's scent fills her nose and loosens the binds on her lungs. Soon, Aelin is doing the exercises independently, and Rowan nuzzles his face into her neck. His hands snake under her bump and lift some of the pressure, easing more of her tension.

"There you are," Rowan kisses her cheek as Aelin comes back around. "Are you okay?"

Aelin shakes her head and sinks into his arms. "Can you take me back to bed?"

Her legs feel like jelly, and her stomach is weak from turning. Rowan lifts her with ease. His arms are warm, and he murmurs sweet nothings into her ear as he carries his mate back to their bed.

"Adelia?" Aelin looks around for their daughter.

Rowan pulls back the duvet and reveals the sleepy from nestled right into the middle of the pillows. "She fell back asleep quickly."

"I can't believe Ress told her those things," Aelin can feel a tear slipping down her face. Ress had never forgiven her for her days as Celaena. Darrow had grown to accept her, but Ress never warmed up to having Aelin as his queen despite her efforts.

She hadn't realized the extent his hatred went.

Rowan scowls as he lays Aelin down next to their daughter. "Ress is young and foolish. I have forgiven a lot of his hostility and ignored most of his juvenile antics, but Aelin, I can't forgive this."

"He should never have said those things to Dell." Ress's words linger in her head. She tried to do right by her title and live up to her parent's legacy. Aelin took a lot of pride in listening to the demands of her people and tending to their problems personally. But the odds of Ress being the only one to feel this way are slim. Did they wish she'd never returned? Was she arrogant to take the crown just because it was her inheritance? She'd never had the formal training as ruler and relied a lot on Rowan to help manage foreign affairs. Despite the loss of her fire, many still feared her and considered her a murderer. No matter how hard she tried, Aelin's history as Adarlan's Assassin proceeded her.

Tears burn Aelin's eyes, and Rowan's scowl deepens. "He should have never spoken of you like that at all."

Aelin shakes her head, "It's his right to think what he wants. Maybe he has a point."

"No." Rowan growls, and Dell flinches in her sleep. Taking a deep breath, Rowan softens his voice. "He's wrong, Aelin. Ress was wrong to scare Dell, and he has no right to demean everything you've sacrificed. You've suffered for your people."

"I closed the lock because I had to Rowan," Aelin argues. "That doesn't automatically make me a good queen. What if I'm failing?"

Rowan pulls their duvet up to Aelin's chin, and Dell instinctively snuggles to her mother's side. Her daughter was a leach for warmth, and Aelin could feel her remaining flames writhing in her veins agitated.

"You are a wonderful ruler, Fireheart." Rowan bends down and kisses her lips reverently. "I've met my fair share of emperors, kings, and queens. None of them have given up so much to better the lives of their people. They care for you in return."

Rowan steps away from the bed, and Aelin makes a displeased noise. "Where are you going so early in the morning."

"I'm awake now. I feel like a flight through Oakwald. Go to sleep, and when you wake up, I'll bring my females breakfast," Rowan pulls on a plain white tunic. "Sleep, love. You both need your rest."

Rowan can read her too well. Aelin can feel her eyes drooping despite how much she wants to deny it. "Very well, but there better be tea and pastries."

As Aelin drifts back to sleep, she swears that a mischievous smile passes across her mate's face.

~~~

"Aelin," Maeve twirls a lock of blonde hair in her fingers. "Where are the keys?"

Cairn twists the blade in her thigh again, and Aelin screams, "screw yourself."

Aelin writhes beneath the pain and the dark queen's gaze. Her torturer goes to twist the blade again, but Maeve holds up a hand. "Wait. There is a smarter way to go about this."

"I won't tell you anything," Aelin gasps, the blood seeping from her thigh pools onto the table. "There is nothing you can do."

"Not even to spare the princess?" Maeve smiles as the cell door opens. Connall walks into the room, a squirming girl in his arms.

"Let me go," the girl screams, and the air in the room turns frigid. Her blonde hair whips around as she twists and fights. The little girl's head turns, and she freezes when she catches sight of Aelin. "Mama?"

"Adelia?" Aelin asks, confused. "You can't be here. You aren't supposed to be here." With renewed energy, Aelin thrashes against her bonds and bares her teeth at Maeve.

Maeve takes Adelia from Connall and strokes her hair. "Such a pretty one."

"This isn't real," Aelin hisses. "I wasn't pregnant when you took me. Adelia was born in Terresan."

Maeve hums a sympathetic note, "It seems you're confused." Aelin fights as the dark queen sits with a frozen Adelia in her lap. "Begin again, Cairn."

A hot iron is lain against Aelin's neck, and Adelia's screams rattle the stone chamber.

~~~

Aelin wakes with a gasp. Her chest is seizing in uncontrollable fits, and little hands cup the sides of her face.

"Mama?" Adelia's concerned face hovers over Aelin's. "Why are you crying?"

Relief washes over her at the sight of her daughter, safe and sound. She tries to take deeper breaths, but her body fights against her. The baby in her womb squirms uncomfortably. Aelin feels guilt that they are so subject to her moods. She tries to open her mouth to speak, consol her frightened daughter, but Aelin can't get any words out.

"Daddy!" Dell screams, frightened tears gathering in the corner of her eyes.

Rowan bursts through the door, "Dell?"

Adelia sniffles and kisses Aelin's face sadly, "Daddy, what's wrong with Mama?"

Aelin grabs at her chest, trying to ease the tightness there. She was scaring her daughter. What kind of mother would do that? Rowan sits beside her, and a cool wind goes up her nose and fills her lungs.

"Fireheart," Rowan lifts Adelia and sits beside her. "Is this a sick day?"

It was the code they'd come up with for the days when the past came back to haunt them. When the turmoil in their mind forces their bodies to rebel, and they can't seem to put on their usual facades. It used to shame Aelin, the days she couldn't rise from bed and do her duty. But her mate's unwavering love soon cracked that lie and eased her burden. Rowan had convincing arguments. Aelin's people needed their queen at her best, and on sick days, she wasn't able to give that to them. Their court was strong. They wouldn't allow Terresan to fall while she recovered. Aelin deserved time to heal.

Rowan must have been able to tell that she wouldn't be able to settle herself this time as his winds continued their push and pull in her chest. "Yes," she rasps dejectedly.

Dell buries her face into Rowan's shoulder. Her mate rests a hand on the side of her face and soothes her cheek. "To whatever end, Aelin. We will get through this just as we do everything else."

Rowan kisses the side of Dell's face. "Little love, do you think you can go to the kitchens and have someone bring Mama tea?"

That fae instinct to fuss rears its head in their child. Adelia perks up at the opportunity to do something useful. "Yes!"

Rowan sets her on the floor, and she takes off in a blur of untamed hair and swishing skirts. They wince as a gust of wind slams the doors of their chambers against the wall.

"She's a handful," Rowan talks, aware of the soothing effect his voice has on her. "But we always knew our children would be. I can't wait to see what kind of chaos our son brings into our lives."

Aelin wraps her arms around him as the remnants of her dreams finally fade away. "You think it's a boy?"

"I know so," Rowan pinches her side, and Aelin smiles. He'd also been confident that their first child would be a girl. His smugness after Adelia's birth was unbearable.

"Rowan," Aelin whispers. "Can we just lay here today?"

"I could never deny you anything," Rowan leans against their headboard and kicks off his shoes. "You don't need to ask, Aelin. It's okay to take time for yourself."

"What if I'm just proving Ress right?" The insecurity slips from her lips before she can stop them. "What if there is someone more capable?"

"Ress won't be a problem anymore," Rowan rests a hand against her bump, and the baby withing kicks at it, bringing a smile to his face.

Aelin narrows her eyes, "What have you done?"

"Nothing that anyone will blame me for," Rowan assures. "He would be in a lot more trouble if the rest of the court learned what he said in front of Dell. Ress should be grateful I didn't do a lot worse."

Aelin sighs, "I don't understand why I can't just let it all go. Why do I allow myself to be so haunted?"

"It's not that simple," Rowan shakes his head. "I'm hundreds of years old, and no matter how many years pass, there are things from my past that haven't healed. The mind is different from the body, and sometimes it takes longer for it to recover. There is nothing wrong with that. You gave up everything for the people you loved."

"Because I had to," Aelin contradicts.

A hardness comes over Rowan, "because no one else could."

Rowan rolls over her body into a plank and looks deep into her eyes. "No one else that day would have made the same sacrifices out of love. Not even me. I was too selfish to let you go. You gave up everything, and by the strength in your soul, you came home to me. In all my decades, I have never met someone so remarkable, and I never will again. Take as many years as you need to recover, Aelin. This world owes a debt to you, and I will make sure it pays. You deserve every happiness."

His hand threads through one of hers and drags it up to rest on the bump between them.

Happiness.

Dell darts back into their room, a cup of tea sloshing in her hands as she runs. "Daddy, I put extra sugar in it. Uncle Fen is coming with more cups, but I made this one special."

Rowan pulls away from her, and the laughter on his face is contagious.  

Aelin smiles and accepts the tea from Dell's hands. She even manages a few sips without cringing from the sweetness. Fenrys follows behind her shortly and sets a fresh cup covertly on her bedside table.

There may be hard days, Aelin realizes as her family gathers around her, but the love they showed her every day made it all worth it.