#Kiss Miss Carol: a Crime Story of Christmas

[ungoliantschilde]

“Nick and Carol”, by Tim Sale.

[notlongtolove]

in the woods

three photos. three crime scenes. three notes. slowly, then all at once, it hits you. you know these words. you’ve read these words before. why do you know these words? where have you read them before? this work is part of the little red cap series

pairing: spencer reid x fem!reader (second person, no y/n)

genre: fluff?

content: very brief mentions of a crime scene and blood. lit student reader helps spencer put together a clue he missed.

word count: 2.6k

note: this idea was truly so random but if you like it and are interested to see a p2 that includes her meeting the team feel free to lmk! i would love to develop this story but im having mad writers block rn lol anyways the linked poem is amazing, one of my favourites.

a line: Spencer Reid hardly swears, if ever, but the next words out of his mouth are nothing short of explicit.

But then I was young – and it took ten years In the woods to tell that a mushroom Stoppers the mouth of a buried corpse, that birds Are the uttered thought of trees, that a greying wolf Howls the same old song at the moon, year in, year out- carol ann duffy

Spencer’s distracted tonight. You noticed it the moment he breezed past you, pressing a distracted kiss to your cheek before disappearing into the study. Normally, you’d give him space, let him untangle the thoughts on his own, but it’s past midnight now, and you’ve decided enough is enough.

“Spence,” you call softly from the doorway. 

He doesn’t look up.

​​You take a breath and step inside, the floorboards cool under your bare feet. The study feels foreign to you. You’re hardly ever in here despite Spencer’s gentle efforts to make space for you after you’d started spending more time at his place. He’d cleared half of the mahogany desk for your own books and files—a space now claimed by a few framed photos of the two of you from last year’s Christmas market.

You’ve always preferred his bed over the confines of this room, the comfort of his sheets beneath you, his bedside table the perfect coaster for your copious cups of coffee as you slog over your essays. The study always felt too still, almost stifling. It’s the kind of quiet that breeds overthinking, though Spencer thrives in it—Especially when it’s work.

Which it does seem to be tonight, judging by the furrow of his brow and the way his hands are clasped, tense, as he pours over the file in front of him. You cross the remaining space and place a gentle hand on his shoulder, thumb moving in soothing circles. 

“Hey,” you murmur, leaning down to speak into the curve of his neck. He reaches up absently, fingers threading into your hair, but his eyes stay fixed on the contents on the desk. 

“Come to bed,” you whisper, quieter this time, softer, as though you might coax him away if you’re gentle enough. 

He murmurs something you don’t quite catch, his focus still locked on the papers. You frown, the corners of your mouth tugging downward as you try again, this time layering your voice with the soft insistence you know he can’t resist.

“Please?”

That gets him. He sighs, the sound heavy, before slowly swivelling his chair around to face you. There’s a small flicker of satisfaction in your chest—still got it, you think, though his tired eyes make it hard to fully savour the victory.

“Soon, honey,” he says, soft and apologetic, but it’s not enough for you.

“Missed you today,” you murmur, stepping closer.

He shuts his eyes for a moment, reaching out to pull you into him. His arms wrap around your waist as he presses his face into your stomach, breathing you in like you’re the first fresh air he’s had all day. And with the day he’s had, you might as well be. 

“It’s almost 1,” you remind him gently, brushing a strand of his hair back. “And you haven’t even showered.”

He makes a sound—somewhere between a groan and a half-hearted protest. Probably indignation, though he doesn’t bother to articulate it. When he finally lifts his head to look at you, your chest tightens. He looks so so tired. Handsome, always, but tonight, the weariness in his eyes is impossible to miss.

“Aw, honey,” you coo, voice soft with affection. “C’mere.”

It’s ironic, considering you’re the one climbing into his lap. The chair protests under your combined weight with a faint creak, but neither of you care. Just your presence alone is a comfort that Spencer accepts all too willingly. He doesn’t hesitate, pulling you closer and burying his face into you, fingers toying with the edges of your—his shirt.

“Tough case?” you ask quietly, your fingers slipping into his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp.

He nods defeatedly, the motion slow and heavy, like even that small acknowledgment takes too much out of him.

“He’s already—” Spencer sighs, low and weary. “Already killed three women. And the profile is… flimsy at best.”

You nod quietly, your fingers gently tracing patterns on his shoulder. Though crime-solving and criminal profiling aren’t your expertise, the weight of what he carries is never lost on you. You’ve come to know the signs all too well.

You see it in the way he comes home after cases like this—silent, drained, his body curling into yours. You hear it in his voice when his worry spills over during arguments, like the time he snapped at you for drinking too much on a night out after a brutal final. It wasn’t out of anger but fear, raw, born from the evils he sees every day. He’d never explicitly linked it to the horrors of his work, but you didn’t need to be a profiler to piece it together. 

“You’ll catch him,” you say softly, keeping your voice steady despite the knot tightening in your stomach. “You guys always do.”

Spencer sighs, releasing one hand from your waist to rub the bridge of his nose. “There’s something off,” he mutters, words tinged with frustration. “I just... I can’t figure out what it is.”

“Do you… want to talk about it?” you offer gently, watching his face for any sign of what he needs.

He manages a faint, tired smile and shakes his head. “I’d rather not,” he murmurs.

You nod, letting it go. Spencer tries, always, to keep that part of his life separate from you. But even you know some things are impossible to leave behind. Shadows don’t adhere to boundaries. They’re stubborn and heavy, sometimes seeping into the cracks of his resolve. All you can do is try your best to hold him together when that weight gets too much to bear. Leaning into him, you rest your head against his, the silence between you filled with a kind of unspoken understanding.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” Spencer whispers after a moment, as though he can sense your quiet disappointment at not being able to do more. His arm tightens around your waist as though anchoring himself. You press a soft kiss to his temple, a quiet gesture of acknowledgement.

“Now,” you say, standing up. Spencer leans forward instinctively, unwilling to let the warmth of you go. “Shower?”

He glances between you and the desk strewn with papers, hesitation in his face. “After I—”

“Nope,” you interrupt, grabbing both his hands and gently pulling him to his feet. “I’ll handle this,” you say, gesturing to the chaos on the desk. “You,” you point toward him, then toward the bathroom, “Shower. Now.”

Spencer lets out a long-suffering sigh, but the smile tugging at his lips betrays him. “Bossy,” he teases softly.

“Maybe,” you reply, a playful glint in your eyes. “But you love me.”

Without missing a beat, Spencer wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer as he presses a kiss to your lips. “Wow,” he murmurs against your mouth, his tone warm and teasing. “Bossy and smart. How did I get so lucky?”

You roll your eyes but can’t help smiling, nudging him lightly toward the bathroom. “Go,” you say, laughing. “Before I add ‘violent’ to that list.” At that, Spencer tears his arms away from your waist, holding his hands up in mock surrender as he backs slowly toward the door. “Go!” you laugh again, shaking your head at him before turning your attention to the desk strewn with papers.

You turn your attention back to the desk surveying the organized chaos, trying to piece together how he usually files them. The thin sheets—pale and slightly crumpled—belong in the manila folder. The thicker briefs, stapled neatly, go in the black case. And the photos…

Huh. 

Your hand pauses mid-reach, brow furrowing as your eyes fall on the glossy prints. You tilt your head. Something about them feels—almost… familiar, maybe. You stop to lay them out side by side, studying them more closely. 

Three photos. Three crime scenes. Three notes. 

The first note reads, ‘I burn.’ The words are scrawled haphazardly, the letters jagged and uneven.

The second is darker, more ominous, ‘Your knife.’ Its edges marked by splatters of blood.

The third is the most unsettling of all. Just two words. ‘All alone.’ Stark and final. 

Slowly, then all at once, it hits you. 

You know these words. You’ve read these words before. 

Why do you know these words? Where have you read them before?

It gnaws at you. The exhaustion you felt earlier is long gone as you find yourself sinking into Spencer’s chair. Your fingers trace the edges of the prints as you try to piece together your fragments of memory. You don’t know how much time has passed since you first laid eyes on the photos until Spencer calls to you from the bedroom.

“In here,” you answer absently.

When he steps into the doorway, your heart flutters despite yourself. He’s a sight to behold—hair damp, shirt slightly clinging to his chest, a towel draped over his shoulders as he dries his hair.

“Hey,” he says, a soft smile tugging at his lips. “Why’re you still in here?”

“Got distracted,” you murmur, gesturing to the desk.

“Intriguing, huh?”

“She definitely is,” you reply, almost without thinking.

“I don’t know when he’ll strike next—” he starts, then stops abruptly. His expression shifts, his gaze sharpening as he looks at you. 

“What’d you just say?”

“Hm?” You blink, finally meeting his eyes.

“You said ‘she’s’ intriguing,” he repeats, stepping closer now. “You think the unsub’s a she?”

“Isn’t she?” you say, frowning at the question. “I could definitely use a lot of other words to describe her, but…” your voice uncertain.

“What makes you say that?”

“Well, the poems, for one—I mean, they’re all about hurt and enraged women,” you explain. “And signing off with them? That’s definitely not not intriguing…” You trail off, puzzled by the sudden gravity of the conversation. 

Spencer goes rigid, every muscle in his body locking up. “Poems?” 

“Yeah,” you say, your voice small now, “The notes. They’re all closing words of Duffy’s poems. I thought you—Did you not…” 

Your words trail off as you see his face harden, eyes widening as the weight of your words hits him. 

“Oh my god.” Your hands fly to your mouth as the realization hits you, the pieces suddenly falling into place. “You didn’t know.”

Spencer Reid hardly swears, if ever, but the next words out of his mouth are nothing short of explicit. He’s already moving towards the desk, the towel falling unnoticed to the floor. “Show me,” he says, urgency in his voice. You get up quickly, wanting to make room, but he stops you. “No, you sit,” he says, eyes locked on the notes. “Show me.”

“Okay, okay.” You steady yourself before pointing to the first note. “Um, look, this one, ‘I burn.’ It’s from her poem Warming Her Pearls. She’s a maid who secretly pines for her mistress. She loves her but, well, she can’t be with her cause they’re from different societies.” You look up at him expectantly. “It’s about class inequality and…”

“Unrequited love.” Spencer finishes gravely, his voice low but certain.

“Right, exactly.” You glance up at him, searching his face for understanding. Spencer nods, taking it in, and you move on to the next. 

“And then this one, ‘Your knife.’ It’s from Valentine. The speaker, she doesn’t want the usual valentine gifts, so she gives an onion instead. But… she says it’ll make the receiver cry, because well, onions do that. It’s a basically a metaphor for love, how—” You take a deep breath, your throat tightening. “How dangerous it can become.”

Spencer stays quiet, but his eyes are fixed on you. His hand finds your back, giving a reassuring, gentle rub.

You hesitate before pointing to the last note. “And this one, ‘All alone.’” You swivel the chair around to face him fully, the tension in your chest growing. “I wasn’t sure about the first two, but when I saw this, I knew.”

“Little Red Cap,” Spencer finishes for you, his voice tinged with self-reproach. “Your favourite. God, why didn’t I see this?”

You nod, your voice softening. “Yeah. The opening poem of The World’s Wife. She uses Red Riding Hood to explore growing up, losing innocence and… well, you know the rest.”

Spencer’s lips press into a thin line as he nods grimly. “The wolf represents someone older, predatory. A lover.”

“Yeah, and she uh,” you say, barely a whisper. “She kills him.”

Spencer’s jaw tightens, his frustration evident. “How did I not—How’d you—” If the situation weren’t so dire, you might have joked about never expecting to hear those words from Spencer Reid. Instead, you force a shrug, casual, as if your analysis hadn’t just reshaped everything. “TA-ed a few classes on Duffy,” you say grimly.

The silence stretches, heavy and charged, until Spencer crouches down in front of you. His sharp eyes soften as they meet yours. “You’re… you’re incredible, you know that?” His tone is low, reverent. He presses a brief, warm kiss to your forehead before standing, running a hand through his still-damp hair. Then his expression shifts, eyes darkening with urgency. “I need to make a call.” 

You nod silently, still curled up in his chair. You don’t trust your legs to carry you to the bed that’s one room over, not right now. Spencer steps away, his phone already pressed to his ear. It takes only a few moments before he starts speaking.

“Hotch,” he begins, “I think the unsub is a woman.”

The reply on the other end is muffled, but you can follow the conversation through Spencer’s responses.

“Poems, yeah—Carol Ann Duffy,” he says, pacing a few steps. “We’ve been looking for patterns in the wrong places.”

He pauses, listening, before adding, “How’d I—? Just… from a friend.”

His tone is careful, protective. You know Spencer doesn’t want his team knowing about you. When Spencer told you he wanted to keep his professional and personal lives separate, you didn’t understand at first. But after he’d opened up about what happened to his boss—how it shattered everyone—you stopped pushing. You understood then why he was so insistent on drawing those boundaries, even if it meant staying in the shadows of his world. 

You watch him, eyes tracing the way his jaw clenches, the restless motion of his fingers. “This is the lead we need. What—No, we don’t need to bring them in.” ​​You can see the moment his patience snaps.

“What we need is to focus on her work—her themes, her voice. It’ll give us insight into the unsub’s mindset. No, I—” Spencer’s tone sharpens, frustration creeping in as he rakes a hand through his hair, tugging at the ends. 

“I know this is important, I’m not saying it isn’t—” He stops mid-sentence, the voice on the other end cutting him off. His lips press into a thin line, and he exhales through his nose, fingers pinching the bridge. “Fine,” he mutters, his tone tense but resigned. 

“Okay.” He pauses for a beat, “We’ll—she’ll be there.”

As he hangs up, Spencer turns back to you, his expression carefully guarded. “What are you doing tomorrow?” he asks, tentative.

You have two lectures. “Nothing,” you say, the word slipping out easily. He frowns, uncertain. 

“Kristoff’s out sick, and Burton doesn’t care about attendance anyway,” you quickly lie. The tension in his face eases just slightly, but you can still see the hesitation in his eyes.

“Right, um, my boss,” You can sense a hint of nervous energy in the way he shifts his weight. “He wants us in at 8, sharp. I’ll drive.”

The apology is clear in his expression as he crouches down, taking your hands in his. “I know this isn’t exactly what you signed up for,” he says, his voice quieter now. “But... I know he wouldn’t ask if it weren’t important.” 

A simple, quiet “I know” is all you can manage.

You can tell he feels bad about dragging you into this. You definitely hadn’t imagined this would be your introduction to his world either—messy, intense, and impossibly heavy. And from this brief glimpse, you’re not sure if you’re ready for it after all.

⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ hi if you're here! thank you for reading! feel free to like or reblog or comment or reply!

[cathygeha]

REVIEW

Here Comes Cowboy Claus

By: Diana Palmer, Kate Pearce, Delores Fossen

Three short Christmas cowboy romances with happily ever after for more than one couple ~ Fun easy stories to read for the holidays

COLORADO CHRISTMAS CAROL by Diana Palmer

Essa and Dean start off more like enemies at first sight with Mellie, Dean’s precocious daughter, there to help them move closer together as Dean looks for a killer and Essa works on her first novel.

THE MOST WONDERFUL RANCHER OF THE YEAR by Kate Pearce

Pen and Rob were fun to get to know. I really liked them together. Pen doesn’t have a filter and says what she thinks and she thinks she likes Rob. Rob has a difficult past that included drugs and prison but is a charming man perfect for Pen.

HER CHRISTMAS COWBOY by Delores Fossen

Reese is on the hunt for a serial polygamist and comes face to face with a man she shared a steamy kiss with that neither of them have forgotten. Reese and Zack were perfect together and the three wives of Happy Harry also might end up with some interesting partners.

4 Stars

BLURB

Cowboys and Christmas are an unbeatable combination in this charming anthology of contemporary western novellas perfect for fans of Linda Lael Miller, Jill Shalvis, and Maisey Yates. Whether they’re out on the range or working in town, these men are rough, rugged, and ready for action. They’re true-blue cowboys, and New York Times bestselling author Diana Palmer, along with Delores Fossen and Kate Pearce, will show you just how hot they can be when they’re yours . . . COLORADO CHRISTMAS CAROL, Diana Palmer When a Texan lands in Colorado to solve a case, the last thing he expects to uncover is a sweetly pretty cook who’s also a struggling novelist—and who is more than ready to write their love story . . .  THE MOST WONDERFUL RANCHER OF THE YEAR, Kate Pearce It’s sour meets sweet when a former rancher battling more than one private demon meets a woman who lights up his heart, and proves to him that anything—even love—is possible. HER CHRISTMAS COWBOY, Delores Fossen A sheriff convinced to investigate an aging bigamist by the gorgeous P.I. he kissed at a party quickly discovers that the real crime would be missing a chance to get her into his arms again . . .

[thisisartbylexie]

Sherlolly Appreciation Week - 2020 Fic Rec Post

@sherlollyappreciationweek is this week and I’ve had my head not screwed on straight and missed daily posting.  Which means y’all are going to deal with a single LONG post of Sherlolly Fic Recs. I’m making up for timeliness by dumping more recs than anyone asked for. Buckle up. 

(tl:dr - Listen, you can find every flavor of Sherlolly fic curated like a Willy Wonka’s factory over on @miz-joelys-sherlollilists, but I have curated a gourmet banquet for you right here. Please leave feedback for the creators.)

DAY ONE -  Gone But Not Forgotten (WIPs/Incomplete Fics)

I left a review and am also recommending The Ghost and Molly Hooper by doctor_WTF. This is the story of Molly who purchased 221B Baker St only to find that the last inhabitant died, but never really left. This is set as an AU with the context of TRF. 

Also gonna recommend A Line to Cross by @blogyourfeelingsaway. This is an AU where Molly doesn’t actually like Sherlock at first, much to his surprise...

Delayed For A Little While by @lono285. A Princess Bride AU we don’t deserve.

DAY TWO - Angst Fest 

Phoenix by @lono285. This is the author’s summary: Nothing could bring Molly Hooper back to life. He saw her final breath leave her body. But with a few short words from a nameless voice on the telephone, he realized the resumed beating of his heart had a name: hope.

Ghost of A Girl by Alethnya. Author’s summary: Death, as it turns out, wasn't quite as final as Molly had always believed. Fear not, you will smile at the end, I promise. 

 All You Ever Wanted At Just The Wrong Time by @soyeahso. This wasn’t what Molly expected being a relationship with Sherlock would be like. 

The Coffin-Maker’s Lullaby by @hobbitsdoitbetter. This is ANGST but it’s more like catharsis post-S4. 

But if you’re REALLY looking for The Pain Train, take the emotional tour via The Gods Have [No] Mercy by TuesdayTerrible. This is a soulmate AU.

Also, The Five Stages of an Illogical Death by AndInTimeThisTooShallPass. It’s exactly what you think it is. 

DAY THREE - When We Were Young (S1 & S2)

A Beautiful Mind by jankmusic. I have a theme for fics, apparently, because this one is also super emotional. This is set vaguely in the S2 timeline, but it’s an amnesia fic that starts with established Sherlolly. But then...

Her Last Bow by @PetraTodd. This is just after S2. Author’s summary: Like a knight going off to war, when Sherlock goes off to fight Moriarty's network, he takes a favor from Molly Hooper. (Of course, favors are normally *given* but Sherlock isn't really one for manners.)

All The Things Said and Unsaid by @elixirbb. Molly goes with Sherlock after The Fall. 

Every Time and Always by @flaignhan. Written just after S2.01 aired. 

Do I even need to mention The Full House  and Always Something by @emceefrodis? Because like, that should be part of the Sherlollian Bible or something. 

DAY FOUR - Bust Out (Comedy Gold)

Friends Like These by @elixirbb. Sherlolly post-S2 from Lestrade’s POV. 

A Little Inspiration by @lilsherlockian1975. Humor with some angst, but a fun read. 

If You Like It... by ll_again. ...put a ring on it. Post-S3 where Molly and the Holmes parents form a friendship. 

The New Conception by Quarto. Post-S3 ish. Author’s summary: It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single consulting detective in possession of an undercover assignment must be in want of a wife.

DAY FIVE - EPIC (Long Fics)

A Fearful Hope Was All The World by @miabicicletta . End of the world AU that somehow hits HARD especially now. Not for the emotionally fragile, but there’s still HEA. 

In matters of the heart by TheSapphireSky. Regency AU. There’s mystery and heart-wrenching emotion with our favorite idiots. It’s *chef’s kiss*. 

The Signs of the Four by Emma_Lynch. Victorian AU you’re looking for. 

The Necessary Mother by darthsydious. Victorian AU where Sherlock is a single father and Molly comes to help him. This isn’t on AO3, so I will tag with the warning of character death (secondary, but still gutting due to period typical mortality). 

Molly Hooper and the Flagon Nocturnal by Zoa. It’s a CRIME that this Indiana Jones AU doesn’t have more comments.

In general, if you’re looking for LONG fics, check out the 2015 Sherlolly Big Bang Collection. Every fic has a minimum of 25K. 

DAY SIX - Fluffy Friday

So I like my fluff with a side of angst (for ~flavor~).

Order From Chaos by MaybeItsJustMyType. Soulmate AU. 

Semantics by @geekmama. Sap everywhere. 

Intuit by ClassySpanks. Molly runs away to Switzerland. 

Zephyr by @writingwife-83. A Victorian AU arranged marriage. 

I also had to mention Wedding Day by floosilver8. This is Groundhog Day-set up, Molly POV, set at the Watson wedding. Not like 100% fluffy, but I love reading it when I need a pick me up. 

DAY SEVEN - Free For All

You guys know I’m a sucker for a period AU. So I’m going to recommend one of my favorite AUs: London Bridge Is Falling Down by @lono285. This is a WWII-era AU that I love to bits and pieces because it’s ADORABLE. 

Speaking of AUs, here’s a Victorian amnesia fic. Changing Faces by @likingthistoomuch

Also, there’s an S2-ish hasty marriage AU Band of Gold by @mizjoely and the 1940s AU remix With This Ring written by me. (yup, I am SHAMELESS. And quite proud of this one.)

I’m gonna add with a tear, the truth comes by broomclosetkink. Semi-angsty AU of the Watson wedding. Fix-it fic.

Looking for the Christmas Carol AU? Well, try A Knockout Christmas by Ellis_Hendricks.

Here’s Sherlock-Is-An-Actual-Moron. Unplanned pregnancy AU where Sherlock doesn’t realize it’s his. Hearts Don’t Break Around Here by darthsydious. 

OOOOOOOOF. I’ve been reading your Sherlolly fics since like 2011 and I have heaps more (SO many fantastic authors I didn’t even mention here!). 

Please check out the official post because the other half of this appreciation week is also leaving feedback for authors.  

Give them some LOVE! 

[p-artsypants]

Drabbles and Fanfiction

Every once and a while, I will share this list. You can also find this page on my blog. 

Full list of all my works:

Find most, if not more, of these fics on:

fanfiction.net | archive of our own | wattpad

(~AU’s, *Finished, ❤️Author’s Favorites)

Kingdom Hearts

~❤️Rage Awakened ao3 | ff.net- Ten years ago, Terra, Aqua, and Ventus lost their fellow apprentice, Sora, in Deep Jungle. Now, they are to return with two new students, Riku and Kairi, to lock the heart of the world. All the while, something watches from the trees. Feral!Sora AU

My Kingdom for a Heart ao3 | ff.net - The curse of being one of the Princesses of heart, is that there’s always someone out to get you. As Xemnas looked failure in the face, he reached out in a last ditch effort and destroyed Kairi’s heart. Now her friends must travel the worlds again. Sora, to find a way to recover Kairi’s heart, and Riku, to make amends to those he has wronged. All the while, the darkness grows.

Miraculous Ladybug

One Shots

*❤️amalgam- When an young man is rejected for being ‘incompatible’ he turns into the akuma ‘Amalgam’ able to fuse two people together. And later Adrien and Marinette would debate if it was lucky or unlucky that they got hit. (Also Available in russian)

*sing we all noel- After receiving the worst Christmas present ever from his father, Chat Noir finds himself out on the streets with nowhere to go on Christmas Eve. Thankfully, Ladybug finds him and brings him home.

*speechless- In a world where everyone has a soulmark, the first words their soulmate will say to them, Marinette is born without one. But Adrien Agreste has two. Curious, considering he’s mute.

*❤️tunnels of love- The night started out with an accidental kiss from Adrien Agreste, and ended with her bleeding in the Catacombs of Paris. Ladybug, the wielder of the miraculous of good luck. Yeah right. (Some blood)

*the reveal that wasn’t- first parts My ending to kittybug’s Tumblr Prompt

*what a mess we’re in- Ladybug has a lot on her mind, and when Chat Noir bugs her enough, she tells him she’s going to confess to her Crush, Adrien Agreste. Chat’s reaction is not what she’s expecting.

Long Fics

Longest Night- (ff.net | ao3) - The day started out sucky to begin with. Her crush ousted to the class and Adrien. Lila taking pride in exacting her revenge. But by the time patrol was over, a young man was dead, and Ladybug’s identity was at risk. Lila was the least of her concerns. Good thing Adrien was taking it all like a champ. (Rated M for scenes of torture)

*❤️nine lives- (ff.net) When Adrien Agreste is scheduled to go to a Military School in Germany, Chat Noir must make a critical decision. Does he give up his Miraculous? Or does he give up his life as Adrien? I’ll save you the trouble of guessing, he gives up being Adrien.

*tender words- When Marinette finally gets the guts to confess her feelings for Adrien, some things go so wrong, and other things go so right.

How To Train Your Dragon

One Shots

The Vikings Have Their Tea (ff.net | ao3)

arranged marriage- Takes place at the beginning of HTTYD

❤️breathe- Survival of the fittest

~childhood friends- At the Sandbox

❤️easy fix- In which Hiccup has a bad day

~fashion designer- Astrid needs a fill in

❤️frozen- In Which Astrid takes a Dip and things get frisky (Rated M)

❤️headache- In Which Hiccup hits his head….really hard

❤️heir- In Which Hiccup is Picked (longer version by fatecharms)

illness- In Which Stoick is a dad

~illusionist- Trick gone wrong

~in the walls- In which there’s a poop ghost

~knocking on the wrong door (2) - A chance encounter

❤️messages- Astrid is Frustrated with Hiccup’s obliviousness

~to mirkwood- Hiccup is not a dwarf

~monster falls- Hiccup and Astrid take a dip

❤️mute- In which there’s a quiet stranger

~music video (ImgHS)- He didn’t expect it

❤️operation: lovebirds- In Which the gang makes a plan, and Hiccup gets Drunk

~over- Too many nightmares

~partners in crime- A normal day at work

~pirate- Astrid is the greatest treasure

~prince- He doesn’t want to be a broken King

❤️sorting things out- In Which Astrid gets her ducks in a row

~the dragon and the dame- Beauty and the Beast Au

the pit- In Which Hiccup is rescued

hide and seek- Part 1

lost and found- Part 2

Long fics:

*❤️infernal responsibility- Being the son of the chief takes brains, courage, and a lot of patience. But at his father’s the request for marriage, Hiccup decides he has had enough. When he seeks out a life of ease, he runs into more than what he bargained for.

*❤️roses and lilies- “Astrid, you and I both know you’re much tougher than I am. You’re more brave, and a better fighter…but just for a little while…could we pretend that I’m the one protecting you?” “Oh gods yes!” (Also Available in spanish!)

*~what the water gave me- The sea is a wild and dangerous thing, something that cannot be foretold or predicted. Hiccup discovered this many years ago, in human naiveté. Yet, what was meant as a sacrifice became a new life, one like no one could comprehend. He now finds himself once more in the unknowing hands of those that sentenced him to death. He only prays things will be different this time. Merman!AU

*parasite- Soulsnatcher Dragons are rare but deadly. But, As Hiccup finds out, it’s the eggs you have to watch out for.

*~320 state street- Gobber’s Goods. A Hardware Store that was rumored to have everything you needed. She thought she only needed a job. Turns out, she needed a lot more than that. (A Modern AU no one asked for)

*~❤️the north tower- When Finn Hofferson died, Astrid inherited his castle in Wales…and a whole lot more. Something sinister lurks in the North Tower.

*~❤️boy toy- ao3 - At the age of 21, Princess Astrid lawfully has to pick a husband. But when the perfect groom is nowhere to be found, she requests the toymaker to create one for her. It’s safe to say that everyone in the kingdom is a little concerned. (Pinocchio!AU I guess?)

no, you go first- ao3 - The Chief of Berk was a headstrong viking, stubborn and full of pride, and willing to do whatever it takes to keep his village safe. But for a moment, he puts that aside, and listens to his son. In which Hiccup convinces his dad not to make him go through Dragon Training, and the subsequent changes that follow.

*in due time- ao3 - As another illness sweeps through Berk, Gothi needs another ingredient for her medicine…one that doesn’t exist anymore. Fortunately, she kept that old spell book around for such an occasion. Big Hiccup is sent to five years into the past, and his younger self sent to take his place in the future. But it’s only a few days, what could go wrong?

Trollhunters: Tales from Arcadia

❤️arcadia or bust- In Which Arcadia welcomes back it’s underground citizens.

Teen Titans

Oneshots:

~big brother- Don’t turn out the light (Horror)

dear jason- Bruce Writes a letter

just drawing- Bruce thinks about Robin

the prisoner- Starfire is Guilty

of mustard and three foot purple tongues- A collection of Oneshots and Drabbles

Long Fics (*Finished):

*~❤️carol of the bells- High in the dark Bell Tower of Notre Dame, there lives a mysterious bell ringer. Legend tells of the angel who fell from the sky, and the curse she bares. There are few who know her true identity though; her master, the priest, and the acrobat that performs on the streets below. Based loosely on ‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’ RobxStar and slight BBxRae

*no escape- Three years ago, Starfire escaped an Alien race called the Gordanians, to arrive on Earth. They’re back, and ready to put Starfire back where she belongs, behind reinforced Titanium bars. Robin’s not about to let her go…if only he hadn’t got captured first. How does it feel to be the alien, Robin?

*now you know my pain- When the new Villain, Gender Bender, comes to down, the Titans find themselves in an odd situation. They’ve been turned into the opposite gender against their will! Now in order to change back, they must learn to understand the gender they’ve turned into. Rated T for obvious reasons. A great read if you’ve ever wondered why girls or guys do [blank].

*paint it black- Robin disappeared three months ago. Now, Jump City’s crime rate is mysteriously being taken care of by a normal, albeit strange, teenage boy who goes by the name Black. As the Titans befriend this lunatic, they begin to see a relation between him and their missing leader. Will they be able to find Robin, or will Black turn them all insane as himself? Actually, contains NO OC.

*saving grace- “When I’m done with you, you won’t be able to walk upright or speak coherent sentences and all you’ll see is my mask and my voice repeating in your head…Weak. Richard Grayson, I am not tough, I am everything that you fear.” Happy Ending! Smudge of RobStar. NO Slash!

Other Fandoms

Final Fantasy XV

❤️requiem for pitioss-“O King. The god’s have heard your cries. Know that we weep with you. The Oracle’s calling has not yet been fulfilled. But…Lunafreya as you know her cannot return the way she was.” Noctis looked up, hopeful. “But she can return!” Canon divergence from Chapter 9. Happy ending. Some spoilers.

Beauty and the Beast

*❤️behold the beast- A Oneshot alternate ending to the Animated Film

Cinderella

*❤️midnight- “When the clock strikes twelve, the spell will be broken,” the fairy godmother had warned. A retelling of the story, when Cinderella doesn’t escape the ball in time. Oneshot

*so this is love- What if Jaq and Gus hadn’t made it in time to help Cinderella? A new twist on the ending of the classic Fairytale, and what lies beyond the story. She still gets her happy ending and her Prince, and her step family gets their just deserts.

Sleeping Beauty

*❤️a love song back to me- Maleficent saw the loophole that stared her in the face. Prince Phillip would break the curse in time, for sure. After all, he was betrothed to Aurora. So in an effort for her evil plan to stay in action, Maleficent takes care of the young prince herself. Phillip never imagined having to live off the land like the birds above. Alternate twist on the classic Disney tale.

Escaflowne

down feathers- Hitomi’s depressed. She’s been away from Van too long, he comes back to visit her…but what if something went wrong with the transfer? (Not finished. Never will be finished. Mwahaha) Circa 2012

*angel’s wounds- Fanelia’s been victorious in their most recent battle with Basrum. Unfortunately, someone is wounded and just seeks solace in his love that lives so far away. Post Anime.

momma look sharp- With the war between Fanelia and Basrum finally coming to a close, the kingdom is celebrating. The young king, however, is suffering from an experience unlike any he had before. Van finally seeks solace in his wife.

[goingtothetardis]

The Stralaluri Effect

Rating: Teen Pairing: Ten x Rose Characters: Tenth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Donna Noble Find it: AO3 • TS Series: The Gallifrey Room Summary: When Rose asks the Doctor if they can make their own Christmas traditions, he takes them to Noël, the perfect destination for all things Christmas. However, while enjoying a rich celebratory dinner after winning a contest, the Doctor falls victim to a food that doesn’t react well to his physiology, much to Donna’s dismay.  Tags: Christmas traditions; Humor; Telepathy; Drugged!Doctor (alien physiology vs. alien food) Words: 5828 Author’s Notes: This is my 2017 @dwsecretsanta for the lovely @lovethytennant! She requested a situation where Ten gets hurt and Rose or Donna save the day with a little bit of Ten/Rose romance and a little bit of Ten & Donna humor. Ten’s not exactly hurt, per say, but he’s definitely a bit... incapacitated. :D

I hope you don’t mind, but I wrote this fic to fit in my Gallifrey Room verse (see above link), but it can totally be read as a stand alone fic. Just keep in mind that Ten and Rose have been reunited and share a telepathic bond, and Donna continues to travel with them. 

Merry Christmas to you!! I hope you enjoy this!!

Beta’d by the ever amazing @countessselena and @caedmonfaith!

Also, because I’m a dork and like to waste time looking for the perfect gala gowns, this is what I imagine for Rose’s dress and Donna’s dress. 

Rose sits at the kitchen table, eyes closed as she calculates dates in her head. Months after returning to her original universe and the TARDIS, time once again passes in a disjointed way, but she does her best to follow some semblance to an Earth calendar. According to her best calculations, it’s her favorite time of the year:

Christmas.

“Donna, do you celebrate Christmas?” Rose asks, turning around in her seat to look at Donna, who’s filling the kettle with water at the sink.

Donna pauses and makes a face. “Not really, no.”

Rose scrunches her forehead together, unable to understand why anyone wouldn’t like Christmas. “Why not?”

“Well, remember Lance and the Racnoss?”

Rose nods.

“We were supposed to get married on Christmas.”

“Right,” Rose says, remembering her outrage when Donna had first told her the story. “I didn’t realize it happened then.”

“Yeah,” Donna says softly.

“What if we went somewhere else to celebrate Christmas? I think it’s close to that time of the year, and I… I miss it.” Rose stands up and leans against the kitchen island, watching her friend.

Donna raises an eyebrow. “I’m listening.”

“There’re lots of planets out there with some sort of winter festival tradition similar to Christmas on Earth. What if we made our own traditions? Erase the bad memories of your last Christmas and make it something new?” she proposes.

“Will you make the Doctor wear an ugly Christmas jumper?” Donna asks with a sly grin.

“Done,” Rose says, laughing as she takes the cup of tea offered by Donna.

“Well, in that case, count me in. What can go wrong with a very TARDIS Christmas?” Donna says, sipping her tea.

Rose cringes. “Oh, don’t say that, Donna. That’s just invitin’ trouble.”

“Trouble?” a voice asks from the doorway. “What’s inviting trouble?”

Rose shares a glance with Donna, who rolls her eyes.

“Of course you’d show up at the mention of trouble,” Donna says, pouring another cup of tea and handing it to the Doctor, who sidles up to Rose and kisses her on the back of the neck.

Rose shivers and smiles, sensing the Doctor’s curiosity through their bond.

“We’ve decided it’s Christmastime,” Rose announces, shifting so she’s facing the Doctor. “I think I’ve figured it out, and according to Earth’s calendar, it’s about that time of the year. I miss it, Doctor. I want to make our own traditions.” She stares at him, blinking innocently a few times, waiting for him to break down.

The Doctor huffs. “Why would we go to a boring Yule planet when we could go to a planet where unicorns are real?”

Rose pauses, momentarily distracted. “What, really? Unicorns?”

The Doctor smiles, as if sensing a win, and she shakes her head, pulling herself back to the matter at hand.

“Unicorns later. But right now? Christmas. But I mean, only if you want, Doctor. I don’t want to force you.” She chews on her thumbnail and stares at the Doctor, and in the background, Donna snorts in amusement.

He sighs in apparent defeat. “I never really had a choice, did I?” the Doctor says, crossing his arms over his chest and sticking out his bottom lip in a pout.

“Not when she gives you those mooneyes, no.” Donna reaches across the counter and pats his shoulder. “Sorry, Doctor.”

“Eh, I enjoy a good Christmas festival. The nibbles are always top notch. And snow! Real snow!” His eyes narrow as he turns to Donna. “How’d you agree to this? I didn’t think you liked Christmas.”

“Rose’s charms don’t just work on you, Time Boy.” Her long suffering sigh makes Rose laugh.

“So, Doctor, where’s the best place in the universe to celebrate Christmas? I want it all. The snow, the shops, the markets, the mistletoe,” she pauses to wink at the Doctor, “the hot chocolate and cookies, the reindeer, the presents, the trees.” Rose sighs dreamily, her eyes fluttering shut as she imagines the scene. “The perfect winter wonderland.”

The Doctor pushes off from the counter and paces the kitchen. “The perfect winter wonderland… There’s Pinehurst Rex, but no, the trees get a bit bitey. That won’t work.”

Rose wrinkles her nose. Bitey? “No, no biting trees, ta.”

“There’s Jinglelandalia Prime Alpha Three, but the last time I was there, the carolers got a bit handsy. Tried to steal my scarf! I mean, you say I’mrude, but oooh-ho-ho, those carolers...”

“Nope,” Rose says, shaking her head, struggling to bite back a grin.

“Hmm… No, not there. How about… Nah, too cold and no hot chocolate. No Christmas nibbles, either, now that I think of it..” The Doctor tugs at his hair as he thinks, and Rose waits patiently for him to come up with the perfect place. Donna shifts and sighs. “And no, not there, the shops are a bit rubbish. But there’s… Oh! Oooh! That’s it! Noël!”

Rose can’t help but smile at the expression of pure excitement on the Doctor’s face, sharing in his enthusiasm.

“I can’t believe I didn’t think of it right away! It has everything you asked for and more, Rose. Donna, you’ll love it! If Christmas is what you want, Christmas is what you’ll get!” The Doctor grabs Rose’s hand, but as he moves to pull her out of the kitchen, Donna clears her throat.

Rose tugs the Doctor to a stop. “Ehm, Doctor, wait. There’s just… one thing. A small thing.”

“Rose?” he asks, looking between Rose and Donna, his eyes narrowing in suspicion when Rose chews on her bottom lip. She knows it’s an easy tell when she’s nervous.

“There’s just one catch,” Donna announces, walking up to the Doctor and Rose. “I agreed to this little Christmas adventure as long as you wear a Christmas jumper.” She smirks. “An ugly one.”

“Absolutely not.”

“Please, Doctor,” Rose whinges. “I promised.” Rose holds his gaze, grinning triumphantly when she feels his defenses failing through their bond.

“Fine,” the Doctor says with a growl. Then he lifts his hand and points between Rose and Donna. “But if I’m going to look like a ridiculous ape in a Christmas jumper, you are too.”

“Fair enough,” Donna calls out as she breezes past them and heads down the hall toward the wardrobe room. “Meet me in the console room in twenty minutes! I’ll bring your jumpers!”

“What?!” the Doctor squawks in indignation. “I don’t get to pick it out?”

“Oh, please.” Donna turns to face them and rolls her eyes. “Like I’d let you chose after I’ve seen some of the atrocious fashion crimes your past selves have worn? Willingly worn, I might add.” She shudders.

As Donna continues down the corridor and out of sight, the Doctor turns to Rose, who is doing her best to not laugh at the rather put-out expression on his face. “I feel like I’ve been set up.”

Rose shrugs, unrepentant. “You love it.” She smiles at him, tongue between her teeth, before pulling the Doctor down for a thorough snog.

After a few minutes, Rose reluctantly pulls away but is pleased when the Doctor gazes at her with a dumbstruck expression, dazed and dreamy. It thrills her that even now, she can disarm him so thoroughly. Leaning up on her toes, she pecks him once more on the lips, and sends a surge of love across their bond before taking his hand.

“Come on, Doctor. Time for Christmas.”

Several hours later, Donna laughs mercilessly at the sulky Time Lord as they walk out of the gingerbread house-like theater.

“You won. I can’t bloody believe it. All that whinging about wearing a Christmas jumper, and you won the contest for the ugliest Christmas jumper on the planet! she crows, wiping her eyes.

Rose doesn’t bother holding back her laughter as she pats the Doctor on the shoulder. Knowing the Doctor’s deeply competitive nature, she realizes the position he’s in must be torture. “You can’t decide if you want to gloat about your win or pout about wearing that jumper.”

“Roooose, it’s awful.” The Doctor picks at the neon green Christmas tree feathers and pouts, jutting his lower lip out in a way that makes her want to bite it. “Can I please put my suit back on?”

“Nope, not answering. This is Donna’s decision,” she answers.

“Donna, how much longer must I wear this atrocity?” the Doctor asks, flicking one of the bells adorning the bottom of the jumper and glaring at Donna when she doubles over laughing once more.

“Okay, okay, you can take it off. I’m surprised you’re not strutting around like a peacock in the middle of a mating dance after winning that competition, though,” Donna says. “You! Winning an ugly jumper contest! Oh, I’m so glad I had my camera with me.”

Before she finishes speaking, the Doctor pulls his pinstriped blazer out of his trouser pocket and pulls the jumper over his head, forcefully shoving it into a nearby bin. As he shrugs the blazer over his shoulders, he sighs in relief, then stops in his tracks when Donna mentions the camera.

“Hang on– A camera? Hand it over,” he demands, holding out his hand. “Camera. Now.”

“Nope!” Donna says with a serene smile.

The Doctor looks at Rose. “Rose, make Donna give my camera back.”

Rose smiles, then links elbows with Donna. “Sorry, I’m not getting in the middle of that. Besides, we have the winter gala to get ready for, yeah? Winner of the ugly jumper contest and his plus one and two get VIP access, remember? Right now, we have a date with the TARDIS’s wardrobe room. Black tie.”

“What?!”

“You heard me. I’m sure the TARDIS will pick out a foxy tux for you to wear.” Rose smirks before turning around, but as she walks down the sidewalk with Donna, she shares an extra thought with the Doctor through their bond along with several images of low cut gowns she’s seen on occasion in the wardrobe. Don’t worry, Doctor. I’ll make it worth your while, I promise.

The TARDIS provides both Donna and Rose with gowns befitting both their personalities and individual styles.

Rose wears a black velvet bodice with a low cut “V” between her breasts that is paired with a flowey ombre shaded skirt in shades of grays, purples, and blues. A thin gold belt rests on her waist, adding a cutting edge to the look. Rose declares a matching cape tied at the neck with a velvet collar her favorite detail of the gown.

Donna struts around like a queen in the sapphire blue velvet, off the shoulder gown with gold embroidery along the edges of the material. It’s cut in such way to flatter the figure, and despite the high slits up the sides, the matching blue tulle underneath below maintains a simple modesty that Donna very much appreciates. Much to Donna’s delight, the gown comes with a built in cape on the back as well.

“You’re gonna knock his socks off,” Donna says, eyeing Rose up and down, admiring the gown.

“Yeah?”

“Absolutely. He’ll have a double hearts attack. And I love the cape. It’s the perfect touch.” Donna reaches out to adjust the bow, and they leave the wardrobe for the console room.

The TARDIS, bless her, has temporarily shifted the floor to a smooth, marble like surface, so that neither she nor Rose would get their heels stuck in the grating.

“I’ve never been to a gala like this,” Donna announces, and Rose smiles.

“I always love a good gala, Donna. They’re gonna think you’re a queen. I’m sure your dance card will be full all night.”

“I hope so, but I’m sure you two will find some way to get into trouble,” she jokes.

Rose laughs, though she doesn’t deny Donna’s prediction.

Just as she suspects, the Doctor, dressed in a rather dashing tuxedo, loses all ability to speak the moment he lays eyes on Rose, and they stare at each other for several long moments until Donna realizes they’re having a conversation without her.

“Excuse me, care to include the whole class?” She rolls her eyes. “You may address Queen Donna.”

The Doctor finally picks his jaw off the floor and drags his eyes to Donna. They widen in surprise. “Donna! You look… lovely!”

“I know, thanks,” she smiles. “No need to act surprised about it. Thank your ship. She’s got a marvelous eye for fashion.”

“My ship… What?!”

“Has an eye for fashion. She chose our gowns herself,” Donna explains.

Rose pats the console. “Yeah, she always has the best things.”

The Doctor splutters once more, clearly not understanding how his magnificent Time Ship has a fashion sense. “I thought you said I’ve worn some ‘atrocious fashion crimes.’ Who do you think helps pick out my outfits after I regenerate?”

Donna snickers. “I’m pretty sure the TARDIS just laughs at you when you fall for it time and time again.” Taking Rose by the elbow, she says, “Come on, Rose, let’s go to the gala. He’ll get over it eventually.”

Dinner is an extravagant affair, with two long tables filled with guests and a twelve course meal to go with it. Donna can’t believe it’s the prize for winning a bloody ugly Christmas jumper contest, but she’s not complaining.

Christmas trees stand around the hall, decorated in exquisite ornaments and twinkling lights, and garlands are strung artfully around the room. The whole look is almost magical, shimmering and warm, the perfect Christmas ambiance.

A small break occurs between the main course offerings and dessert, and Donna graciously accepts the arm of an eager dance partner.

The Doctor and Rose already dance together in the center of the ballroom, completely enraptured by one another. Rose’s smile is so radiant that Donna blinks back tears at the sight.

A few songs later, the announcement for dessert is made, and the Doctor flies past Donna, making a beeline for their table. He pulls Rose along with him, who protests at his speed, but Donna knows it’s just for show, as her friend laughs gleefully with the Doctor.

“Oh, I can’t wait!” the Doctor exclaims, once they’re all settled at the table. “Desserts on Noël are supposed to be the best in the universe. Splendid! Spectacular! Scrumptious! Ooooooh, I wonder if they have bananas on Noël. Rose, do you think they have bananas?”

“You’re a nutter, you are,” Rose laughs, swatting his arm.

“Mmm, yeah, but I’m your nutter,” the Doctor smiles disarmingly, nudging her back with his elbow, and Donna snorts.

“Ugh, you two. Get a room,” she mutters.

“Oh, we will. Won’t we, Rose? In fact, we have a room, and I intend to use it later.” He waggles his eyebrows, and Donna doesn’t miss the way the Doctor’s gaze drops to Rose’s chest and lingers. The flush on Rose’s cheeks suggests she doesn’t miss it either.

Rolling her eyes, Donna turns her focus to the wait staff as they bring out tray after tray of desserts, all of which look almost too magnificent to eat. There are cakes and pies, pastries and chocolate, along with delicacies she doesn’t even have a name for. There’s no possible way she’ll be able to try one of everything.

“Oh my God,” she says, her eyes widening in awe.

Before Donna has even decided what to try first, the Doctor digs into a slice of cake. “Oh, but this is brilliant!” he shouts. “Banana, Rose! It tastes like banana!”

“Actually, sir,” one of the waiters steps over and taps the Doctor on the shoulder, “it’s a delicacy on Noël called stralaluri. It’s a fruit usually reserved for use in this cake.”

“Ooooh, I’ve never heard of it,” the Doctor says, his eyes alight with interest and excitement. He returns to his cake with increased fervor, licking his fork clean after his last bite.

Donna shakes her head in amusement. It never ceases to amaze her how an alien as old and knowledgeable as the Doctor can find such joy in something as simple as discovering a new fruit.

The Doctor devours two more slices of the stralaluri cake before moving onto other desserts. Donna finds a mini tart made out of something that tastes like a strawberry, and she closes her eyes to savor the taste.

“Fork,” the Doctor declares suddenly, and Donna’s eyes fly open to focus on the Doctor. “I eat with a fork.” He dissolves into giggles and falls into Rose, who stares at him in confusion.

Donna swallows the last bite of tart and stares at the Time Lord sitting across from her. Just as she opens her mouth to say something, he picks up his fork and holds it in the air.

“I’d like everyone to know that this is my fork. My fork-ity fork fork. Fork bork dork mork. Fork. It’s a very beautiful fork.” He gazes at it for several moments, then turns to Rose. “Look, Rose, you love the fork. Love the fork!” For a few seconds, she stares at him, brows furrowed in complete bewilderment. However, before she can say anything, the Doctor places his hand on her shoulder, and it’s as if a switch flicks. Her face relaxes and she crumbles into hysterical laughter. The Doctor joins her.

“Doctor?” Donna raises an eyebrow. She won’t deny she’s often wondered about the Doctor’s sanity, but this is pushing the limits, even for him. And Rose is… Well, the way she’d switched from sane to manic in the blink of an eye is slightly alarming.

“Donna!” The Doctor jumps up from the table and sends his chair flying out behind him. “Donna, you look ravishing tonight.” He leans forward, peering at her in wonder.

She reels back in shock, not expecting either the growly sort of voice he only uses when he’s trying to make a move on Rose – (She wishes she did not know what his make-a-move-on-Rose voice sounds like) – or the Doctor to use the word ravishing while looking at her. Bile rises in her throat.

Looking around, the guests sitting close to them stare at the Doctor as if he’s lost his marbles, and she sighs, attempting to school her features while shrugging her shoulders in apology.

“Doctor, what is going on? You’re acting weird, not that that means a lot when you’re involved, but Rose is being weird too. Are you okay?” she asks, her brow furrowing in concern.

“Oh, I think I’ve been poisoned. Nothing to worry about, Donna. Nothing to worry about,” the Doctor sings in a warbly voice. “I’ve been practicing my Xkcarthaianx language skills? How’m I doing?” He holds his hand out for Rose, and she takes it, standing up and shoving her chair back with careless grace, then sways back and forth, as if dancing to a tune only she can hear.

Rose bursts into nonsensical song, mimicking the warbly voice used by the Doctor moments before. “Molte bene, bolte bene, mooooooolte bene,” she sings.

“Bravo, Rose!” The Doctor claps furiously, shouting his praise at Rose.

“Poisoned? You’ve been poisoned? Oh, of course you have. You great big–” Donna tries to get a word in edgewise, shouting over a singing Rose and a cheering Doctor.

“Did I say I’ve been poisoned? I’m kidding, Donna. Kidding! Don’t be such a spoilsport. Spoilsport spoilsport. How do you like my Romanian, Donna? I’m fluent in a billion billion languages. Perfectly perfectly fluent. Molte bene,” he draws out every syllable of the word before linking arms with Rose, bopping her on the nose, and throwing his head back in laughter.

Donna covers her face with her hands, completely mortified. The other guests stare and point, murmuring among themselves, until one of the waiters comes to her side.

“Ma’am, these are your friends, yes? The Doctor and his wife?”

Opening one eye, Donna looks over the table to find the Doctor and Rose in a passionate embrace, moaning loudly as they paw desperately at every available surface of the other. “Oh God, yes. They’re with me. I’m so sorry.”

“For the protection of our other guests, we ask that you kindly remove your friends from the gala. You are more than welcome to return,” he says, “but please leave your friends outside.”

Donna closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, counting to ten. Oh, she’s gonna kill the Doctor.

Standing up, she carefully steps out of her chair, and walks around the table under the watchful eyes of the other guests, already knowing they’ll be the centerpiece of gossip on the planet for weeks to come.

With an air of authority, Donna marches around the table and links elbows with Rose before grabbing a fist full of the Doctor’s lapels. “You two. Out. Now.” She shoves herself between them and half ushers, half pulls them out of the hall.

By some miracle, they follow her command, but her relief doesn’t last long.

The Doctor strokes the soft velvet of her gown. “Soft, Donna. You’re so soft, so beautiful,” he croons, resting his head against her shoulder as they walk down the hall toward the exit.

Donna reels back in horror, gaping open mouthed at the Doctor as she comes to a sudden halt. Manic, hyperactive Doctor she can handle. A Doctor putting his… his alien wiles on her is not anything she ever wants to face.

“Donna,” Rose hisses from her other side.

“Rose?” Ignoring the Doctor for now, Donna focuses on her friend. “Are you okay?”

“Donna, I think…” She whispers loudly, her voice uncertain. “I think the Doctor’s drugged. Something’s wrong.”

“Well, I certainly hope he is,” Donna exclaims, once more shrugging an overly cuddly Doctor off her other shoulder, “because if this is some weird Time Lord mating ritual, I want no part in it.”

Rose cracks a faint smile, but her eyes crinkle with worry. “I think when we touch, he can’t control his side of the bond, and whatever he’s affected by somehow affects me too.”

Donna’s eyes widen. “That would explain a lot.”

“We hardly ever shield ourselves from each other anymore, and if he’s affected, he wouldn’t be able to keep himself from me.”

“No touching, then,” Donna commands, looking between Rose and the Doctor. “One of you like this is bad enough.” WIth a loud sigh, she turns to the Doctor. “Doctor, if you pet my cape one more time, I swear to all the gods that I will pour pear juice over all your suits and ask the TARDIS to hide the wardrobe room from you.”

“But Donnnnnnnnanaaaaaaaaaaaaaa…”

“Pear juice! And I’ll make absolutely sure the TARDIS throws every single one of your bananas out an airlock.” Donna glares sternly at the Doctor, who gasps in horror at her threats.

“You wouldn’t.”

Poking the Doctor in the chest, she growls, “Watch me, you alien prawn. Hands. Off. Donna.”

The Doctor crosses his arms across his chest and pouts – actually pouts – like a petulant three-year old child. Then he spots Rose standing on the other side of Donna, and Donna watches in amusement as his entire face lights up with happiness. “Rose!”

Before Donna can stop him, he lunges past her and wraps his arms around Rose, who pulls against him a moment before relaxing into the embrace.

Donna’s groan of exasperation echoes down the long hallway. “Hopeless idiots,” she mutters.

Out of the corner of her eye, she spots one of the waiters walking down the hall toward the kitchen. “Oi!” she calls, unable to keep the slightly hysterical edge out of her voice. “Come here!”

Once the waiter reaches Donna, looking uneasily at the Doctor and Rose, who play imaginary hopskotch hand in hand down the hall, she explains the situation. “Look, I need a place to lock my friends so I can figure out what the Doctor ate.”

“What do you mean?” the waiter asks.

“I mean, the Doctor’s drugged, poisoned, completely unhinged. One of you lot fed him something he shouldn’t have eaten, and now him and Rose are out of control. The Doctor actually,” she pauses to make a gagging face, “made a move on me.”

The waiter’s eyes widen at her story, and in an instant, he pulls out a small tech pad of some kind and punches in a few keys. “I’m so sorry, ma’am. I’ve summoned my supervisor, and he will be able to assist you with anything you need. I will…” his gaze shifts to the Doctor and Rose, now taking a break to snog, “...er, find a room for them to, ah, entertain themselves.” HIs ears tinge pink.

“May I help you?” an authoritative voice calls out, and she turns to face the newcomer.

“Yeah… Claude,” Donna says, inspecting the supervisor’s name tag. “See him?” She points at the Doctor. “He’s drugged. I think your lot served him something a bit off.”

The first waiter nods at his supervisor, then runs down the hall toward the Doctor and Rose.

“I assure you, ma’am, the food served at the gala is fully inspected and is of the highest quality, safe for all guest consumption,” Claude insists.

“I’d believe you if the Doctor acted like this all the time, but trust me, I know when the Doctor is not well, and now is one of those times. Are you sure it wasn’t something he ate?” She crosses her arms and glares at Claude, who takes a step back at her threatening gaze.

“I, uh, well– What species is the Doctor? Is he not human?”

Donna looks over her shoulder and rolls her eyes at the Doctor and Rose, who have accosted the poor waiter and are attempting to braid his hair. “He’s a Time Lord, ever heard of them? This one’s got a big, pompous ego with a brain that never stops but acts like a child on a sugar high more often than not.”

Claude’s eyes widen in shock. “Oh dear.”

Donna pauses. “Oh dear?”

“The Doctor hasn’t by chance ingested the stralaluri cake, has he?”

Of course it’s the not-banana but tastes like banana cake.

“Only three slices of it,” she answers.

Claude momentarily casts his gaze on the Doctor before returning his focus to Donna. “Stralaluri has been known to cause mind-addling effects to some species, causing a, as you put it, ‘drugged’ state of mind that causes a period of unbecoming behavior.”

“So it’s not gonna kill him?” she asks.

“Oh no! It’s not lethal. We wouldn’t have served it to him had we known,” he shrugs in apology. “We see overwhelmingly only visitors of human origin on Noël. I apologize for the nature of your expulsion from the gala. Is there anything we can do to assist you with the Doctor and his, I’m assuming, Time Lady wife?”

Donna laughs. “Oh, she’s not a Time Lady, but they’ve got… Oh, never mind.” Deciding it might be best to keep the existence of the Doctor and Rose’s bond under wraps, Donna considers Claude’s offer. “In fact, there is something you can do. I’d like to enjoy the rest of the gala, if you don’t mind. The TARDIS gave me this fabulous gown, and it’d be a shame for it to go to waste.”

“I agree, ma’am,” Claude says, looking her up and down in apparent appreciation. “But your friends? The cannot return in this state.”

“Oh yes, I’ll leave that up to you and your staff. I believe you’re more than equipped to assist me for the evening, yes? You can lock them in a room – no windows for them to climb out – and let them sleep it off. Guard the door to make sure they don’t escape. I’m sure they’ll shag themselves to sleep at some point.” She smiles serenely at Claude. “I just need to fetch a few things from the Doctor before I return to the party.”

Donna marches over to the Doctor and Rose, freeing the newly cornrowed waiter, who runs away with mumbled thanks, and pulls the two apart. “Rose,” she says after a moment, once her friend shakes her head and returns to a lucid state of mind. “Everything’s under control. The Doctor just ate something he shouldn’t have, but he’ll be fine. I’m going back to the gala, and I’m making them look after you two the rest of the evening.” She pauses. “Is that all right?”

“It’s not lethal?” Rose asks, unable to keep her eyes off the Doctor.

“Nope, not according to Claude. We can go, if you like, but I think it’d be easier for us to stay here so you can both sleep it off,” Donna explains.

“Good,” Rose says with a smile, her shoulders relaxing in relief. “Go back to the gala, Donna. I can see you want to. Just… Wait a mo.”

Rose steps back to the Doctor and rummages through his pockets, pulling out the sonic screwdriver and psychic paper and quickly handing both to Donna. “Probably best you hold onto these, yeah?” She giggles, then, falling into the Doctor as the stralaluri affects her once more through their bond. Holding hands, they twirl around the hallway, bumping into each other with shrieks of laughter every few seconds.

Donna tucks the sonic and the psychic paper in her wristlet, and smoothes down her gown as she prepares to return to the gala. Perhaps she’ll ask the bloke who’d sat a few seats down from her for a dance. “So you’ll sort these two out for the evening?”

“Ah,” Claude says, his face blanching slightly. “Have no worries, Ms.–”

“Noble. Donna Noble,” Donna says, turning to return to the gala. She pauses. “If the Doctor gets too out of control, just threaten him with a pear or bribe him with a banana. Works every time.”

“Unnnnnggggghhhhhhhhhh.” A loud groan vibrates against Rose’s chest.

Cracking open an eye, Rose inspects her surroundings while feeling the need to echo the Doctor’s groan of discomfort. Closes her eyes, she attempts to focus on the dim memories flitting through her mind from the previous evening.

Christmas jumpers. A gala. A gorgeous gown. With a cape! Dancing. A table filled with desserts.

It’s there the memories get hazy. Rose rolls away from the Doctor, her bladder notifying her of her need to find a loo, and promptly rolls off whatever surface she’s laying on, landing with a loud thunk on the floor. “Ow,” she mutters, then groans as the rest of the missing memories return.

According to Donna, the Doctor had eaten something that had affected his mind, and when touching him, affected her through their bond as well. Blimey. A night filled with the ridiculous antics of the Doctor makes her want to bury her head in a pillow out of sheer embarrassment.

Separated from the Doctor, now, however, her mind clears, and despite his continued presence in her mind, she feels mostly back to normal, if a bit hungover. Rose sits up on the floor and looks around the room. It’s dim in the morning light, with windows lining the room high on the walls surrounding them, far out of reach. She sits on the floor below a… baby grand piano? One of the Doctor’s legs falls over the edge.

A soft knock at the door pulls Rose from her thoughts. “I swear to God, you’d better be decent,” Donna calls, then pushes open the door.

Rose blinks, squinting as the light from the hallway pours into the room. “Morning, Donna.” She laughs at her friend, who’s holding her hands over her eyes. “We’re dressed, don’t worry.”

Donna lowers her hands, then laughs loudly. Rose follows her gaze to the piano. Another loud groan rumbles out of the Doctor. “All right, you two. Time to get back to the TARDIS. I think we’ve had enough of Christmas this year, don’t you think?” She walks over to the Doctor and prods his leg. “Wake up, Doctor.”

Rose pushes herself off the floor and stands, stretching from side to side and watching in amusement as Donna attempts to spur the Doctor into action.

“Doctor, I made good on my threats, and I soaked all your suits in pear juice,” Donna announces.

The Doctor flies off the piano in a flurry of tuxedo clad limbs. His eyes are wide and frantic. “You did not!”

Donna crosses her arms over her chest. “After what you put me and Rose through last night, trust me, Doctor. Things could be a lot worse.”

“Rose?” The Doctor whips his head around to face her. “What did I do to you?” He seeks her out through their bond, and she senses his raw anxiety which she instantly soothes.

“Doctor, I’m fine. You didn’t do anything. Well–” She pauses and turns to Donna. “No more cake for him, right?”

“Oh, God, no,” Donna says, agreeing with a vehement nod.

“What… happened?”

Donna sighs. “Turns out the fruit in that cake you had three slices of doesn’t agree with a Time Lord’s physiology. It drugged you, and whenever you touched Rose, you weren’t able to keep from sharing the effects of it through your bond.”

The Doctor blinks. “Oh, well, that explains a lot.” He smirks. “I’m sorry, Donna.”

Rose chokes on a laugh when Donna glares at the Doctor. “Yeah, you sound real sorry.”

“Oi, everything worked out, didn’t it? No harm, no foul.”

“Says the skinny strip of nothing too drugged off his arse to care,” Donna mutters.

“Tell you what, Donna. I’ll make it up to you. We both will.” The Doctor looks at Rose with a wide smile, and she mirrors him, happy and content. “Another Christmas planet? How about it? A cozy winter festival where the locals think women with red hair are goddesses of fire? Hmm?”

“Actually, Doctor,” Rose says, “I’m the one who wanted to make our own Christmas traditions. I think Donna might appreciate it more if we left her on Lux Prime for a few days of spa treatments while we make our own Christmas celebration on the TARDIS. What do you think, Donna?”

Donna smiles. “I think you have the best ideas, Rose.”

“What?!” the Doctor squawks indignantly.

Walking over to Donna, Rose links elbows with her friend. “Why don’t we head back to the TARDIS, and you can tell me all about the rest of the gala. Did you dance with that bloke sitting next to you? He was a bit pretty.”

“Oh, I did a lot more than dance with him,” Donna reveals with a sly grin. “The staff offered me the presidential quarters in recompense, and I took them up on the offer.”

“Donna!” the Doctor groans. “No need to share.”

“Doctor, remind me to show you the video footage of you hitting on me last night. I’ll overshare about my evening activities if I want to.”

Rose gapes at Donna as the Doctor gags loudly behind them, ardently denying Donna’s claims.

Donna grimaces. “Never underestimate the power of stralaluri cake.”

[rachywritessomething]

A Modern Christmas Carol

I found the beginning of this... short story (?) in my google docs and I wrapped it up tonight. So I figured I’d post it in pieces so I can actually have something writblr here.

Anyway, here’s the first spirit for A Modern Christmas Carol.

I had become complacent.

The world was ending and I had put horse blinders on myself so I couldn’t see anything but my immediate objective. I focused only on classes and work, and when I wasn’t at either, I scrolled through the pages of how miserable and bleak it all was, doing nothing about it.

This year, I opted to work Christmas Eve because I was still in the city. My sister was spending Christmas day with her inlaws so our family celebration wouldn’t be for a few days after. I already had my flight back home but I hadn’t packed anything yet. Every evening, I told myself I would pack, but always ended up scrolling away.

I was scrolling as I walked home, not seeing anything around me. I hardly even noticed the old, stray dog that wandered near my apartment building. He sniffed about for scraps of food, probably accustomed to a diet of fast food dropped by drunk college kids. I tisked to shoo him away from the front door before stepping inside and climbing the four flights of stairs to my apartment.

Both of my roommates had gone home for the holidays already so I had the place to myself. It meant I could listen to my Christmas music without my headphones while I made mac and cheese from the box for supper before turning on the television to let a crime drama play while I scrolled my phone.

It was strange. I knew I was better off just letting the music play instead.

After a while, I went to my room to do the same thing. I laid in bed, letting a show play from my laptop while I scrolled through my phone, feeling the familiar pangs of guilt and fear and numbness until I fell asleep.

I woke up to the sound of a clang in the kitchen. 

I sat up and looked at the closed door of my room and reached for my phone under my pillow, turning on the flashlight. No one else was supposed to be in the apartment. I knew I should have called the police, but I got up and walked out of the door as if someone else had possessed my body.

The noise came from the kitchen. I rounded the corner, shining my light to find a black shadow over the fallen pan I had used for the mac and cheese.

“What the…” I hit the light on the wall and the creature looked up at me. I recognized her immediately. How couldn’t I? Her black fur, her puppy-like face, her enormous size… she was as picture perfect as I remembered.

“Ellie?”

The berner woofed and bounded over to me, her heavy paws not even touching the ground. She didn’t feel heavy when she leapt up, and when I scratched behind her ears, her fur didn’t feel as thick and soft as I remembered it. Her kisses didn’t leave me coated in slobber and her breath didn’t stink when she panted on me.

“Am I dreaming?” I asked her.

Ellie woofed again and hopped down to lean against my leg as she was apt to do. I didn’t know if her answer meant one thing or another but there was something very comforting about hearing her. It felt like coming home.

I wanted nothing more than to wrap my arms around her and scratch behind her floppy ears, but she hopped up and ran to the door of my apartment.

Ten years of a habit was hard to break, even after months without the opportunity to feed it. She looked at me, her lethal tail wagging away, her tongue lolling out of the side of her mouth. 

“Wanna go outside?”

Ellie bounced on her front paws as she woofed again, her nose in the air, the sound echoing so loudly off the walls, it was sure to wake up my neighbors. I didn’t care. I ran to the door and threw it open for her.

Light flooded through the doorway and snow stretched over the country landscape. I recognized it. The white house by the lake, the trees of the woods in the distance. I always thought it was what heaven would look like. In the winter, the picture could have made a greeting card.

Ellie ran out into the snow, urging me to follow her. I looked over my shoulder to see if I could grab my boots first, but my apartment was gone and I was standing in the drift. It didn’t feel cold against my bare feet. I supposed it really was a dream, but it was a good one.

I ran after the dog and she raced away from me, heading for the road.

There weren’t any cars driving by. It was far too icy for that. There was, however, a sled being led by an eleven-year-old girl in a bright pink coat -the one I had gotten for Christmas that year. Beside her was a big, black dog, pulling the sled by a harness that was probably graded for an actual sled dog. Her cargo only included a backpack and a puppy with markings similar to her own. 

I stopped at the edge of the road beside Ellie and looked from her to her puppy form. Her younger self barked at us and the spirit beside me woofed back, but neither the lead dog nor the young girl looked. They led the sled past, following the road.

Ellie stood and bumped my hand with her head before walking behind. I knew I had to walk beside her.

“This was your first Christmas,” I said to her. “Sophie seemed lonely so we got you.”

Ellie leaned into me a little, her big brown eyes looking up at me as if I was the entire world. 

“Sophie’s okay.” I scratched behind her ear as we walked. “I know she misses you a lot. We all do.” A weight settled in my chest and my throat tightened up as I remembered the call from my mom last spring. I was careful to not make a habit of missing classes but that day, I couldn’t bring myself to go and I don’t think anyone would have blamed me.

“She’s a smart dog but you’ve always been the good girl.”

It wasn’t the spirit beside me that replied, but the puppy on the sled. I looked up just in time to watch the girl grab the backpack.

Both of the dogs waited patiently as she pulled out an envelope, sticking it in the mailbox by the side of the road.

The sight made me laugh. “I remember this,” I said. “I walked to grandpa’s house instead of riding in the car so I could deliver those cards.” I crossed my arms and shook my head. “I’m sure most of them were ruined by the snow.”

The girl and the big dog led the sled on. Ellie didn’t follow them. She nudged me and stepped onto the driveway. I followed her up to the house but I could not remember for the life of me who had lived there. The more I thought about it, the more I began to wonder if I had ever really met them.

Ellie stopped by the door and looked at me expectantly. I knew that look. It was something I struggled to get out of my head. 

“Wanna go back inside, old girl?” As if I had spoken it into reality, her fur looked a little lighter and she did not support herself on her back, right leg. She was still just as pretty and her face was puppy-like, even with her droopy eyes. “Wanna go lay down?”

Ellie woofed, her voice low, and without any regard for who lived in the house, I opened the door and let us both inside. 

We were back in my room in my apartment. Ellie limped slowly to my bed and placed a paw on my mattress. I didn’t think about it, I just hefted her up, her spirit form much lighter than she had been, and she laid on my pillows. She always did like snuggling with them.

I laid down beside her and ran my fingers through her light fur, wishing it would feel and smell like it had when she was alive.

[sleepykittypaws]

Same Time, Next Christmas

Original Air Date: December 5, 2019 (ABC) Where to Watch?: Freeform will re-air it several times this season, and it’s also available right now on Hulu, and ABC On Demand.

Same Time, Next Christmas is the first network made-for-TV Christmas movie since 2016’s Christmas of Many Colors on NBC. As such, it had a far larger budget than a Lifetime or Hallmark joint and spent about a month shooting at the Turtle Bay Resort on O’ahu, so expectations were fairly high.

The first thing my husband said when he saw this starred, “The Glee Girl,” also known as Lea Michele, is, “Does she sing?” And the answer is…Kinda? They play a couple of her Christmas songs over the opening and closing credits, and there’s a bit of caroling, where you can tell she’s struggling mightily to restrain her Broadway voice. (Or, not really trying at all, depending on how you feel about Lea Michele.)

The movie opens with flashback scenes of little kids battling for beach chairs in Hawaii. This continues for years, (minutes in the movie) where we see these two kids, and their families, frolic on the beach every holiday. We see family photographs, text messages and lots of flirting and even a kiss, plus all sorts of happy family moments, until they’re teens and one of the moms dies, so the yearly visits stop for Charles Michael Davis’ family. 

What we don’t see, EVER, are siblings. Nope. Not a mention. Not a background actor. Nothing. Not in the pictures. Not in the family moments. We even see Lea Michele’s entire family arrive at the hotel MULTIPLE TIMES, and it’s just the three of them. THESE SIBLINGS DO NOT EXIST. 

And, yet, in present day, when both families return to the resort, Davis' presumably for the first time since his on-screen mother’s, off-screen death, surprise…They each have a sibling we have never seen, nor even hinted at. Did these mysterious close-in-age sibs never interact with the families through all those years until now? C’mon, movie…Hire two other kid actors and don’t let them speak, but at least show them in the flashbacks. Fair warning: This never once stopped bugging me. 

Oh, and, Lea Michele’s brother is gay and interracially married with a child, solely I presume so that child can have a later interaction with Chad Michael Davis’ child who, unlike normal children of that age, can fit into the exact same swimsuit for three years running. (Not to be alarmist, but they should have her checked, because that lack of growth is abnormal.)

While I’m all for representation and am mostly in the something-is-better-than-nothing camp, but to say the magically appearing siblings get short shrift, would be implying this story had any shrift to give them. Other than his husband posing shirtless (and good for the gay brother, nice catch), there is even less for Michele’s brother to do in the story than Davis’ newfound sister, whose only role is to suck the joy from their father’s life with her nagging. Cool roles for your gay  and African-American woman characters, movie.

So, anyway, Lea Michele is an architect who wants to build beautiful municipal buildings and is sad that towns want to, you know, prioritize function and cost, thus saving taxpayer dollars, over her beautiful designs. When Davis suggests using steel, in lieu of glass, to save money and “still bring in light” and she thinks it’s a genius idea, I am concerned for both of them that they don’t know how transparency works, and think they should definitely not fall in love because their kids would be super pretty, but real dumb. 

Even dumber than their own parents who each apparently, oops, left one of their children home from a Hawaiian vacation for 13 years running. …Again, I never stopped thinking of this throughout the movie. Even all the pictures the hotel shares later, feature only young Lea and Chad. Were these siblings adopted by the families at age 25? If I were them I’d be real ticked I missed all those awesome Hawaiian vacations.

Speaking of, the other thing I never let go of is…How do these people afford these annual vacations to O’ahu at the busiest/most expensive time of the year, with each family member getting their own, large beachfront suite? Maybe Davis’ family, who it's pointed out a couple times has a five-store chain in Boston, could manage it, but how did Michele’s parents, portrayed as hippie, dippy homeopaths pull it off? Are they also bank robbers? Is that why their extra child wasn’t with them? Was he doing time for the family’s crimes?

And adult Davis apparently has a beachfront San Diego home and an endless supply of $250k sailboats at his disposal, anywhere in the world, so he’s clearly also, somehow, a multimillionaire, even though it’s implied his dad is disappointed in his career choices. So, yeah, this movie does not understand how life, money or families work. 

Despite that, the respective parents, minus dead mom who only gets one line, were the best part of the movie. Fun, funny and the bit about Michele’s parents not being able to keep their hands off each other was that comedy thing where they kept repeating it so many times it actually became funny.

Anywho, Chad and Lea reconnect over sailboat wine and private waterfall swimming. (They actually shot at Waimea Falls, closing one of the most popular hikes in the island to tourists for filming, which I bet a lot of people on their once-in-a-lifetime Hawaiian vacation appreciated.) But, oh noes, his not-quite-ex-wife wants him back and he leaves Lea in Hawaii to go to Vermont. Now, of course, you should never date a guy who willingly leaves Hawaii…Or, you know, ONE THAT IS STILL MARRIED AND TOLD YOU SO.

Then, in between that year and next, Davis gets unmarried, but never mentions it to love-of-his-life Lea, while Lea gets un-single, dating Bryan Greenberg, who we know is a bad guy because even though he shows up with thoughtful presents for her entire family and lets Davis’ daughter win the hotel’s Christmas race at the last minute, he’s also practical and loyal. And, yuck, who needs that nonsense? 

Side note, this whole movie was shot in Hawaii, including the “snow” scene set in Cleveland. Yep, not a lot of outdoor malls in Cleveland, and that stacked up ice was melting so fast, Michele and Greenberg are practically wading. I had to laugh.

Still, because she’s the worst, Lea’s character says yes when Bryan's asks her to marry him. (I can recall not one of these character names, and I watched this 12 hours ago.) And, even though she’s making googly eyes at Davis the whole time, she still spends a year apparently happily planning a wedding to Greenberg and is having it (dum, dum, dum) in Hawaii on Christmas…Just to rub it in Davis’ face I guess?

Instead of expressing her doubts way before this, she waits until after the rehearsal dinner, and after she’s gotten some assurances from Davis that he still wants her, and then dumps poor Greenberg, who really has very little to do in this movie besides compete in the hotel’s Reindeer Games, so hope he enjoyed his Hawaiian vacation.

And, as always happens in these movies, it’s portrayed as romantic when she runs after another guy (or, he runs after her, it’s hard to tell here), five minutes after calling off her wedding, which, again, was scheduled for tomorrow. Hot tip: That’s not romance, and Lea Michele’s character here continues to be the worst.

Cut to a year later, and they’re getting married on the beach. I presume a year after that they’re divorced and those family vacys get reaaalll awkward. 

Final Judgement: 2 Paws Up. Loved the Hawaiian scenery—I always want to go to there—the parents, and the sheen of a bigger budget can’t be denied, but there were just too many things I found frustrating about the story to fully enjoy this one.

[nightingveilxo]

Christmas in Sherlock: Four Minutes, Four Seasons

ASiP

Mrs. Hudson, might need some food...something cold will do.

Sherlock is then drugged in ASiB, falls in TRF, then is drugged and shot in HLV. He’s also close to ODing in TLD, and beaten by John. More about similar injuries in @ebaeschnbliah meta Strange Similarities.

The scene at the top is from the ASiB Christmas party, and the Norbury scene from T6T is a replay of these events + the date of TAB. John announces that because his blog counter is stuck at 1895, Christmas is cancelled. So, from here on out, Sherlock relives Christmas over and over.

HLV is Christmas

Mycroft even bemoans how long it goes on, before Sherlock temporarily forgets it’s Christmas Day.

(Notice the way it’s framed through a window, a visual clue we’re having to look into somewhere to see the story unfold. Also, the way Sherlock eats in this scene is how he eats the gingernuts in T6T.)

This scene gets replayed in TAB.

Where is was also Christmastime, albeit in ACD terms, it was 1892.

Close-up on an issue of The Strand Magazine. Nearby, a news vendor is calling out to the passing pedestrians.  He is holding newspapers and another copy of The Strand with a small red sleeve around it on which are the words “SHERLOCK HOLMES” and an in-profile white silhouette of the detective.  Offscreen, carollers can be heard singing “Hark!  The Herald Angels Sing.” NEWS VENDOR: Papers!  Papers! (A hansom cab approaches along the street.) NEWS VENDOR: Papers!  Papers! (The cab slows down as Watson leans out of the window a little and gestures to attract the attention of the vendor.) WATSON: Here. (The cab stops.) WATSON: How’s ‘The Blue Carbuncle’ doing? NEWS VENDOR: Very popular, Doctor Watson.  Is there gonna be a proper murder next time? WATSON: I’ll have a word with the criminal classes. NEWS VENDOR: If you wouldn’t mind. (He points towards the figure sitting next to Watson.) NEWS VENDOR: Is that ’im?  Is ’e in there? (Holmes, mostly obscured from the vendor’s view, apparently kicks Watson, who grunts.) WATSON: No.  No, no, not at all.  (He tips a finger to his hat.)  Ah, good day to you. CABBIE (to his horse, shaking the reins at it): Walk on. (The cab sets off again.  The news vendor calls after it.) NEWS VENDOR: Merry Christmas, Mr Holmes! ( x )

So far on SHERLOCK ( x ) 2010 Sherlock unzips the body bag in “A Study in Pink.” SHERLOCK (at the door to the Bart’s lab): The name’s Sherlock Holmes and the address is 221B Baker Street. (He click-winks at John.) SHERLOCK: Afternoon! (He leaves the lab.) MIKE STAMFORD (to John): Yeah.  He’s always like that. Brief shot of Sherlock in his security man’s uniform at the Hickman Gallery in “The Great Game.” Sherlock flogs the dead body in “ASIP.” MOLLY: Bad day, was it? In the warehouse in “ASIP.” MYCROFT: Since yesterday you’ve moved in with him ... (There’s a brief shot of the door to 221B closing.) MYCROFT: ... and now you’re solving crimes together. In the hallway of 221B in “ASIP,” Sherlock kisses Mrs Hudson’s cheek. MRS HUDSON: Look at you, all happy.  It’s not decent. SHERLOCK: Who cares about decent?  The game, Mrs Hudson, is on! Brief shot of the Houses of Parliament exploding in “The Empty Hearse” [which is out of context when so far this is meant to be a summary of the Season 1 episodes]. 221B’s living room in “TGG.” SHERLOCK: Don’t make people into heroes, John.  Heroes don’t exist and if they did, I wouldn’t be one of them. At the pool in “TGG,” John opens his jacket to reveal the bomb strapped to him. JIM (to Sherlock): I’ll burn the heart out of you. 2012 In Irene Adler’s living room in “A Scandal in Belgravia,” a naked Irene clamps her teeth onto Sherlock’s fake vicar’s dog-collar just as John comes in with a bowl of water and a linen napkin. JOHN: Right, this should do it. (He stares in shock at the sight that greets him.) In the sitting room in Buckingham Palace in “ASIB,” John glances at a besheeted Sherlock. JOHN: Are you wearing any pants? SHERLOCK: No. JOHN: Okay. (They both crack up laughing.) In Irene’s bedroom, she flogs a drugged Sherlock, then strokes her riding crop over his face. IRENE: This is how I want you to remember me: the woman who beat you. In Dewer’s Hollow in “The Hounds of Baskerville,” Sherlock looks at Henry Knight. SHERLOCK: But there never was any monster. (The hound howls and everyone turns their flashlights to the sight at the top of the Hollow.) JOHN: Sherlock? On Bart’s rooftop in “The Reichenbach Fall,” Sherlock walks across the roof towards Jim. JIM: Here we are at last. (He shoots himself in the mouth.  Sherlock cries out in shock and leaps back.) Later, Sherlock is talking over the phone from the rooftop to John on the ground.) SHERLOCK: Goodbye, John. JOHN (crying out): SHERLOCK! (Sherlock spreads his arms and starts to topple forward. John runs towards the place where Sherlock landed.) 2014 In the underground car park in “The Empty Hearse.” SHERLOCK (offscreen): Those things will kill you. (Greg Lestrade takes the lighter away from his unlit cigarette.) LESTRADE: Ooh, you bastard! In the kebab shop SHERLOCK (to John): The thrill of the chase, the blood pumping through your veins ... (Brief flashback to John outside Angelo’s restaurant in “ASIP,” jumping over the bonnet of the car.) JOHN (to the driver): Sorry. (He chases off after Sherlock.) SHERLOCK: ... just the two of us against the rest of the world. (John grabs Sherlock’s jacket and head-butts him.) In the streets near Baker Street in “TRF” [again, shown in the wrong season flashback], Sherlock, handcuffed to John, jumps over the iron fence.  John grabs his coat through the fence and pulls him back. JOHN: Wait!  We’re going to need to co-ordinate. (Brief shot of Sherlock’s grave.) At the bottom of the stairs in 221B in “TEH.” JOHN: I asked you for one more miracle.  I asked you to stop being dead. SHERLOCK: I heard you. Outside Sholto’s room in “The Sign of Three.” JOHN: Shut up.  You are not a puzzle solver; you never have been.  You’re a drama queen.  Now there is a man in there about to die ...  [This could apply to Mycroft as well.]

(Brief shot of Sherlock putting on the deerstalker at the end of “TEH.”) JOHN (sarcastically quoting Sherlock): ... “The game is on.”  Solve it! At Appledore in “His Last Vow,” Magnussen opens the doors to his ‘vaults.’ SHERLOCK (voiceover): He is the Napoleon of blackmail. (Brief shot of Magnussen walking through his Mind Palace library. Shortly afterwards, Mycroft’s helicopter has arrived and is hovering near the patio.) MAGNUSSEN: No chance for you to be a hero this time, Mr Holmes. (Armed police move into position.) SHERLOCK: I’m a high-functioning sociopath. (He shoots Magnussen in the head, then kneels on the patio with his hands raised, his face full of despair.) MYCROFT (speaking to Lady Smallwood and her colleagues): There is no prison in which we could incarcerate Sherlock without causing a riot on a daily basis. The alternative, however, would require your approval. On the tarmac at the airfield, Sherlock offers his hand to John. SHERLOCK: To the very best of times, John. (His plane takes off while John and Mary watch from the ground.) JIM’s VOICE (distorted): Did you miss me?  Did you miss me? LADY SMALLWOOD: How is this possible? MYCROFT (over the phone to Sherlock in the plane): How’s the exile going? SHERLOCK: I’ve only been gone four minutes. [FOUR is important.] MYCROFT: Well, I certainly hope you’ve learned your lesson. SHERLOCK: Who needs me this time? (On every TV screen in the country, Jim looks over his shoulder to the camera.) JIM: Miss me? MYCROFT (over the phone to Sherlock): England. (Sherlock’s plane touches down on the tarmac.)

TFP

THoB Sherlock is still living under Moriarty’s shadow, despite Irene revealing that John has feelings for Sherlock, and John not denying it. Also, Sherlock is drugged, and for the first time, experiences doubt.

Moriarty is shot, but according to Mycroft in TAB, his body is never recovered.

Sherlock is killed by Mary in HLV, but he comes back to life for John, only because he imagines Moriarty prompting him to see who will miss him. Which always seemed like an odd thing for a villain to do. So, what if Moriarty wasn’t the Big Bad Wolf, but was in fact an actor like Richard Brooke, on the payroll of Mycroft and Mary and/or Magnussen? So, on the rooftop he shot blanks, and someone else shot Sherlock?

Sherlock shoots Magnussen, but this is edited to be someone else in T6T.

Eurus shoots John, but in TFP we’re told it was just a tranq, even though John is former military and Sherlock told us in ASiP that he knew the difference between a real and fake gun.

i.e. it’s Sherlock’s brain trying to tell him that the gun action is linked to the mystery in ASiP (where he first hears of Moriarty), the events surrounding Irene and her working with Moriarty (being drugged=being beaten), and the gun situation not adding up in TRF for multiple reasons. Moriarty becomes the present for Sherlock’s mirror, because he’s the clue to the case, Goethe is a statue in Sherlock’s room, Ode to Joy is played in TLD, and that’s why Staying Alive was the song. Riechenbach is German, as was Rache from ASiP, and in TRF we get Moriarty saying “I owe you a fall”, which is “Ich schulde Ihnen einen Fall” in German, it can be understood as both: I owe you a fall or I owe you a case. Again, it’s his gift. Heart vs brain. @monikakrasnorada (I’m tired, so I hope this makes some sense.)

[zeldaspeaksmindfulness]

LIVE READING SERIES AUGUST 7TH 7PM! American Blues kicks off new play reading series on August 7th!  American Blues Theater announces “The Room” Live Reading Series Monthly live reading series kicks off August 7, 2020 with A Shot: #A Love Story Inspired by Black Lives Matter  By Gloria Bond Clunie, Directed by Chuck Smith Chicago, IL– American Blues Theater, under the continued leadership of Artistic Director Gwendolyn Whiteside, announces “The Room”, a brand-new reading series that brings original work, plays in development, and new stories to Chicago audiences. Offering in-depth discussions as well as action steps for patrons that intersect with themes of the plays, “The Room” will debut virtually via Zoom for the duration of the COVID-19 pandemic with the intent to transition into an in-person experience in the future. Inaugurating the series is A Shot: #A Love Story Inspired by Black Lives Matter by Gloria Bond Clunie, directed by Ensemble member Chuck Smith and featuring Ensemble members Wandachristine and Ian Paul Custer. Artistic Affiliate Cara Parrish is the Production Stage Manager. The reading of A Shot: #A Love Story Inspired by Black Lives Matter takes place Friday, August 7, 2020 at 7pm. Gwendolyn Whiteside notes, “It has long been our desire to host a regular reading series to highlight new work, original commissions, and plays in development. Postponing our in-person work due to the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic allowed us time to launch the reading series. While we anxiously await the day when we can safely gather together in-person again, we’re thrilled to connect with audiences virtually via ‘The Room’.” Tickets for A Shot: #A Love Story Inspired by Black Lives Matter are Pay-what-you-can with a suggested donation of $10, and are currently on sale at www.americanbluestheater.com. Ticket holders will be sent a pre-reading email complete with instructions on joining the virtual reading via Zoom. Future readings in “The Room” series include: September Yes, My Name is...Lucy Written by Ensemble member Wandachristine Directed by Ensemble member Chuck Smith Featuring Tony Award winner Deanna Dunagan & Artistic Affiliate Camille Robinson October Alma Written by Benjamin Benne Directed Ana Velazquez Winner of 2019 Blue Ink Playwriting Award November Days of Decision - the music of Phil Ochs Written & performed by Artistic Affiliate Zachary Stevenson Songs by Phil Ochs December Red Bike Written by Caridad Svich ABOUT A Shot: A Love Story Inspired by Black Lives Matter Friday, August 7, 2020 at 7pm Runs: 35 minutes; followed immediately by a post-show discussion When Mrs. Nettie Morris (Wandachristine) goes to the storefront campaign office of congressional hopeful Jeffrey Talbott (Ian Paul Custer) determined to save her grandson from Chicago’s violent streets and incarceration with an ingenious plan – a very personal life and death struggle takes a surprising turn. GLORIA BOND CLUNIE (playwright) is an award-winning playwright, director, and educator. She is a founding member of the Playwriting Ensemble at Chicago’s regional Tony Award-winning Victory Gardens Theater where her plays North Star, Living Green, and Shoes premiered and the founding Artistic Director of Evanston’s Fleetwood-Jourdain Theatre. Other works by this Northwestern University graduate (B.A. Theater, MFA-Directing) include Sweet Water Taste, Smoke, Blu, Quark, Buck Naked, Bankruptcy, #Lovestories inspired by Black Lives Matter, My Wonderful Birthday Suit, and the adaptation of The Last Stop on Market Street. Theaters presenting her work include The Goodman, Triad Stage, Chicago Children’s Theater, Children’s Theater of Charlotte, and Orlando Shakespeare. This Dramatist Guild Fellow has numerous awards including a Chicago Jeff, Theodore Ward African-American Playwriting Prizes, NEA and Illinois Arts Council Fellowships, the American Alliance for Theater’s Education Distinguished Play Award, YWCA YWomen Leadership Award, a Dramatist Guild Fellowship, and the Evanston Mayor’s Award for the Arts. CHUCK SMITH (director) is a proud Ensemble member of American Blues Theater. At Blues, he directed Leroi Jones’ Dutchman and Pearl Cleage’s Flyin’ West. He is a member of Goodman Theatre’s Board of Trustees and is Goodman Theatre’s Resident Director. He is also a resident director at the Westcoast Black Theatre Troupe in Sarasota, Florida. Goodman credits include the Chicago premieres of Pullman Porter Blues; By the Way, Meet Vera Stark; Race; The Good Negro; Proof; and The Story; the world premieres of By the Music of the Spheres and The Gift Horse; James Baldwin’s The Amen Corner, which transferred to Boston’s Huntington Theatre Company, where it won the Independent Reviewers of New England (IRNE) Award for Best Direction; A Raisin in the Sun; Blues for an Alabama Sky; August Wilson’s Two Trains Running and Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom; Objects in the Mirror; Having Our Say; Ain’t Misbehavin’; the 1993 to 1995 productions of A Christmas Carol; Crumbs From the Table of Joy; Vivisections from a Blown Mind; and The Meeting. He served as dramaturg for the Goodman’s world-premiere production of August Wilson’s Gem of the Ocean. He directed the New York premiere of Knock Me a Kiss and The Hooch for the New Federal Theatre and the world premiere of Knock Me a Kiss at Chicago’s Victory Gardens Theater, where his other directing credits include Master Harold… and the Boys, Home, Dame Lorraine, and Eden, for which he received a Jeff Award nomination. Regionally, Mr. Smith directed Death and the King’s Horseman (Oregon Shakespeare Festival), Birdie Blue (Seattle Repertory Theatre), The Story (Milwaukee Repertory Theater), Blues for an Alabama Sky (Alabama Shakespeare Festival), and The Last Season (Robey Theatre Company). At Columbia College he was facilitator of the Theodore Ward Prize playwriting contest for 20 years and editor of the contest anthologies Seven Black Plays and Best Black Plays. He won a Chicago Emmy Award as associate producer/theatrical director for the NBC teleplay Crime of Innocence and was theatrical director for the Emmy-winning Fast Break to Glory and the Emmy-nominated The Martin Luther King Suite. He was a founding member of the Chicago Theatre Company, where he served as artistic director for four seasons and directed the Jeff-nominated Suspenders and the Jeff-winning musical Po’. His directing credits include productions at Fisk University, Roosevelt University, Eclipse Theatre, ETA, Black Ensemble Theater, Northlight Theatre, MPAACT, Congo Square Theatre, The New Regal Theater, Kuumba Theatre Company, Fleetwood-Jourdain Theatre, Pegasus Players, the Timber Lake Playhouse in Mt. Carroll, Illinois, the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana, and the University of Wisconsin in Madison. He is a 2003 inductee into the Chicago State University Gwendolyn Brooks Center’s Literary Hall of Fame and a 2001 Chicago Tribune Chicagoan of the Year. He is the proud recipient of the 1982 Paul Robeson Award and the 1997 Award of Merit presented by the Black Theater Alliance of Chicago. WANDACHRISTINE (Mrs. Nettie Morris) is a proud Ensemble member of American Blues Theater. She has starred on many stages throughout the country in notable productions as the touring company of Fences, The Vagina Monologues, Gee’s Bend, and Thyestes. For her work in Old Settler, she received a Joseph Jefferson Award nomination for Supporting Actress and a Best Actress nomination for the noted Ruby Dee/Black Theater Alliance Award. For her work in American Blues Theater’s production of Beauty’s Daughter, she won the Ruby Dee/Black Theater Alliance Award for her solo performance. She’s toured regionally in Danai Gurira’s (“Black Panther�� & “Walking Dead”) production of Familiar as well as the San Diego’s Old Globe production. Other recent productions include A Wonder in My Soul at Baltimore Center Stage and Incendiary at Goodman Theater. In film she’s worked alongside Whoopie Goldberg in “Clara’s Heart” and starred in the hit comedy as Mrs. Jones in “Me and Mrs. Jones” with Kym Fields. She’s appeared in the television series “Chicago PD”, numerous commercials, and voiced the animated characters in “The PJ’s”, “The Justice League”, and “Scarface” the video game. She’s written a fiction novel, “I Love You More…Than Shoes!” about four actresses over 50 years old still trying to make it in Hollywood; she working on a Zoom production of the popular novel. As a playwright, she’s written for American Blues Theater’s Ripped Festival for 3 years. Her newest play, Yes, My Name is…Lucy! was commissioned by Ensemble member Chuck Smith. It will receive a reading in American Blues Theater’s The Room – reading series. To all her friends, she’s known as…”The Woman Who Can Do It All!” IAN PAUL CUSTER (Jeffrey Talbott) is a proud Ensemble member of American Blues Theater. He’s previously appeared in Buddy – The Buddy Holly Story (Jeff Award – Best Ensemble, Best Musical), Little Shop of Horrors, The Columnist, and 8 years with It’s a Wonderful Life: Live in Chicago! Chicago credits: 33 Variations (Jeff Award – Best Production), To Master the Art (TimeLine Theater/Broadway Playhouse); Bad Jews (Theatre Wit); Annie Bosh is Missing (Steppenwolf Theatre, Next Up); High Holidays (Goodman Theatre); Princess and the Pea (Marriott Theatre); Watson’s Go to Birmingham (Chicago Children’s Theatre). Regional credits: Hero: The Musical (Asolo Rep) and Peter Pan (360 Entertainment – London, UK). Television credits: “APB” and “Empire” (FOX); “Chicago Fire” and “Chicago PD (NBC). Ian is a graduate of The Theater School at DePaul University and is represented by Gray Talent Group. CARA PARRISH (stage manager) is a proud Artistic Affiliate of American Blues Theater where is also the Human Resources Coordinator. Chicago credits: Gem of the Ocean, Electra, Hard Problem, Photograph 51, Five Guys Named Moe, Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner, & Lady From the Sea (Court Theatre); WITCH, Port Authority, Yellow Moon, The Letters, The Caretaker, Death of a Streetcar Named Virginia Woolf, & The Blond, The Brunette, and the Vengeful Redhead (Writers Theatre); Too Heavy for Your Pocket & The Vibrator Play (TimeLine Theatre Company); James and the Giant Peach (Drury Lane Theatre Oakbrook); Jabari Dreams of Freedom (Chicago Children’s Theatre); Romeo and Juliet & Emma (Chicago Shakespeare Theatre); Beauty’s Daughter & Buddy: The Buddy Holly Story (American Blues Theater). Cara is a proud member of Actors’ Equity Association. ABOUT American Blues Theater Winner of the American Theatre Wing’s prestigious National Theatre Company Award, American Blues Theater is a premier arts organization with an intimate environment that patrons, artists, and all Chicagoans call home.  American Blues Theater explores the American identity through the plays it produces and communities it serves. The diverse and multi-generational artists have established the second-oldest professional Equity Ensemble theater in Chicago.  The 31-member Ensemble has 600+ combined years of collaboration on stage. As of 2020, the theater and artists received 221 Joseph Jefferson Awards and nominations that celebrate excellence in Chicago theater and 38 Black Theatre Alliance Awards. The artists are honored with Pulitzer Prize nominations, Academy Awards, Golden Globe Awards, Emmy Awards and numerous other accolades.  

[musichall]

Annie Cast Announcement!

BUY TICKETS

The Music Hall and the Ogunquit Playhouse are thrilled to announce the cast of Annie! And we have some familiar faces this year, with Sally Struthers (White Christmas), Gail Bennett (Mary Poppins), and Jeffry Denman (White Christmas) returning to our stage.

Starring as the lead character Annie is Josie Todd who is making her Ogunquit Playhouse debut. She recently performed in Because of Winn Dixie at Goodspeed Musicals and Annie at Casa Mañana. Her many theatre roles include Beauty and the Beast as Chip, The Music Man as Gracie Shinn, The Best Christmas Pageant Ever as Maxine, and Freaky Friday, Jr. as Monica.

Joining the cast as Oliver Warbucks is Robert Newman who is perhaps best known for his 28-year run as Joshua Lewis on the longest running program in broadcasting history, Guiding Light. The role garnered him two Daytime Emmy nominations for Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series. He has recently guest starred on House of Cards, Chicago Fire, Homeland, Criminal Minds, NCIS, and Law and Order: SVU. His film credits include Amazing Spider-Man 2, Dracano, and the short film Deadline, which earned him the Best Actor award at the Los Angeles Independent Film Festival in 2015. Off-Broadway credits include Perfect Crime, She’s of a Certain Age, Sessions: The Musical, and Quiet on the Set. Mr. Newman’s most recent regional credits include Sweeney Todd, Big the Musical, Annie, Kiss Me Kate, Hairspray, Noises Off, The Civil War, Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf, The Lion In Winter, Disney’s Hunchback of Notre Dame, the world premiere of Naked Influence, Stephen Sondheim’s Putting It Together, Other Desert Cities, Man of La Mancha, Gypsy, Love Letters, Fiddler on the Roof, The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Deathtrap, Peter Pan, Shenandoah, Curtains, Nine, A Little Night Music, The Full Monty, and Sylvia (which he also directed).

Sally Struthers returns to the seacoast to reprise her role as Miss Hannigan. Ms. Struthers is a two-time Emmy Award and Golden Globe Award winner for her performance in the groundbreaking TV series All in the Family. She starred in the Fox television series 9 to 5 and her own CBS series Gloria. She also recurred on the CBS comedy Still Standing and the CW network’s highly acclaimed Gilmore Girls. She joined the Gilmore cast for Netflix’s four movie limited revival, which premiered in the fall of 2016. She recently guest starred in the acclaimed IFC comedy series Maron. Sally’s television movies include: A Gun in the House, And Your Name is Jonah, The Great Houdinis, Hey, I’m Alive, In the Best Interest of the Children, Deadly Silence, My Husband is Missing, and Intimate Strangers. Sally co-starred in two legendary motion pictures in the 70s: Five Easy Pieces with Jack Nicholson and The Getaway with Steve McQueen and Ali McGraw. Sally’s first two Broadway forays were in Wally’s Café with Rita Moreno and Jimmy Coco and Neil Simon’s female version of The Odd Couple with Brenda Vaccaro. For three years she starred as Miss Mamie Lynch on Broadway and on tour in the Tommy Tune production of Grease. In the 20th Anniversary National Tour of Annie, Sally played the coveted role of Miss Hannigan. Sally was named Best Actress by the Los Angeles Artistic Director Theatre Awards for her role as Louise Seger in the musical, Always, Patsy Cline, a true story based on the relationship between Seger and Cline. She won the Ovation Award as Best Featured Actress in a Musical for her performance as Agnes Gooch in the Los Angeles production of Mame, and won a second Ovation Award for Cinderella. She also won a plaque for “Best Actress” in her 7th Grade Class Play. Additional starring theatre roles include regional productions of Hello, Dolly!, Anything Goes, The Fifth of July, Cat On a Hot Tin Roof, The Full Monty, Fiddler on the Roof, Chicago, All Shook Up, Drowsy Chaperone, Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, 9 To 5, Legally Blonde, Thoroughly Modern Millie, Witches of Eastwick, Nice Work if You Can Get It, Grumpy Old Men the Musical, and 42nd Street.

Ogunquit Playhouse is thrilled to welcome Gail Bennett back to the stage in the role of Grace Farrell. Ms. Bennett has performed in the Ogunquit productions of My Fair Lady as Eliza Doolittle opposite Jefferson Mays, The Sound of Music as Maria opposite Rex Smith, and as the title role in Mary Poppins on both the Ogunquit and The Music Hall stages. She recently performed in the Broadway production of Anastasia, as well as the Broadway First National Tour of Mary Poppins (and six regional productions in the title role). Her many credits include The Producers (Las Vegas, Hollywood Bowl), A Gentleman’s Guide… (Sibella), Kiss Me, Kate (Kate/Lilli), The Drowsy Chaperone (Janet with Sally Struthers), The Music Man (Marian opposite Davis Gaines), Hello, Dolly! (Irene), Sunset Boulevard (Betty), White Christmas (Betty), NINE (Claudia), Annie, Get Your Gun (Annie), Cats (Jellylorum), Starlight Express (Dinah), and A Christmas Carol (Belle with Christopher Lloyd).

Joining the cast as Rooster is Jeffry Denman who has performed, directed, and choreographed at Ogunquit Playhouse. He returns to the seacoast after directing/choreographing the highly acclaimed Ogunquit Playhouse 2018 production of An American in Paris, for which he won an IRNE award as Best Choreographer. He last performed in the 2015 Ogunquit Playhouse production of White Christmas at The Music Hall as Phil Davis. In 2011 he was Director/Choreographer for The Music Man and in 2013 he was the Choreographer for West Side Story, both of which received the Moss Hart Award. In addition, Mr. Denman was the Director/Choreographer for 2012’s Damn Yankees, and portrayed Bobby Child in 2007’s Crazy for You, as well as Sir Robin in 2010’s Spamalot. As an actor he has performed on Broadway in Irving Berlin’s White Christmas (Astaire nom, Phil Davis- Original Broadway Cast), Cats (Munkustrap), The Producers, How To Succeed…, and Dream. His Off-Broadway credits include Kid Victory (Drama Desk/Outer Critics nominations, Michael, Vineyard), YANK! (Drama Desk/Lucille Lortel nominations, Artie, York Theatre), Passion (Lt Barri, CSC), and Cagney (Bob Hope, Westside Theatre). He has also performed in many regional productions throughout the U.S. including Fun Home (Bruce Bechdel, Center Stage), Kid Victory (Helen Hayes nom, Michael, Signature), and Healing Wars (Narrator, La Jolla Playhouse).

Cast as Lily St. Regis is Broadway veteran Angie Schworer. Ms. Schworer has graced the Ogunquit Playhouse stage in several productions including Crazy for You as Irene, Chicago as Roxie, and most recently in Mamma Mia as Tanya. On Broadway she has appeared in The Prom (Angie), Something Rotten, The Producers (Ulla), Big Fish, Catch Me if You Can, Young Frankenstein, Annie Get Your Gun, Chicago, Sunset Boulevard, Crazy For You, and The Will Rogers Follies. At the Met Opera she performed in The Merry Widow as Jou Jou. Her many regional theatre credits include Disaster the Musical (Jackie), Always a Bridesmaid (Monette), Sweet Charity (Nikki ), Damn Yankees (Lola), The Full Monty (Vicki), Minsky’s (Ginger), The Will Rogers Follies (Z’s Fav). On television she has appeared on Rosie O’ Donnell Show, Dana Carvey Show, Law and Order C.I., Queer Eye, As the World Turns, The Kennedy Center Honors and Smash.

Rescue dog, Macy, will be playing Sandy. Macy was adopted by guardian and trainer Bill Berloni from Rocky Spot Rescue of Oklahoma City, OK in December of 2009 at the age of 18 months after seeing her on Petfinder.com. Sandy’s first production of Annie was in the summer of 2010 and since she has starred in dozens of productions nationwide. On Thanksgiving Day 2011, she was seen on NBC during The National Dog Show, sharing spots with John O’Hurley.

Bill Berloni is the top recognized trainer for theatrical animals in the U.S. He received a Tony Award for Excellence in Theatre in 2011, honoring his 30 years of rescuing shelter dogs and humanely training them for a career in the entertainment industry. He is also the recipient of 2014 Outer Critics Circle Special Achievement Award and the 2017 Drama League Award for Unique Contribution to the Theater. Bill Berloni’s animals have appeared in hundreds of Broadway, Off-Broadway and regional theatre productions, tours, movies and television shows all starting with Annie in 1977.

Helming the production of Annie is Director/Choreographer James A. Rocco, an award-winning director whose work has been seen on Broadway, Off-Broadway, throughout the United States, London, Paris and Tokyo. He has directed over 200 productions including the World Premieres of Yankee Doodle Dandy, Galaxy Express 999, The Lillian Carter Story, A Country Christmas Carol, and Streakin’! Others include: 33 Variations, Grey Gardens, Sweeney Todd, White Christmas, Jesus Christ Superstar, In The Heights, As Bees in Honey Drown, Guys & Dolls, She Loves Me, Singin’ in the Rain, and more. In NY, he staged The Wizard of Oz at MSG followed by its 3-year National Tour with Eartha Kitt and Mickey Rooney. From 2005-2017, Rocco was Producing Artistic Director at Ordway Center for the Performing Arts in St. Paul, MN. A recipient of numerous Ct. Critics Circle and Broadway World Awards, in 2019, The Broadway League and The Coalition of Broadway Unions and Guilds recognized his 35 years of contributions to theater at Broadway Salutes. Associate Director/Choreographer is Lisa B. Given.

Music Director for Annie is Andrew Bourgoin. Mr. Bourgoin has worked on the Broadway musical Aladdin, and provided Music Direction for the National Tours of Polkadots: The Cool Kids Musical and MadLibs Live!. He has also provided Music Direction at numerous regional theatres including Ordway Center for the Performing Arts, Chanhassen Dinner Theatres, Hennepin Theatre Trust, Theater Latté Da, and Argyle Theatre. Mr. Bourgoin has played keyboard on the tours of Sound of Music, Something Rotten!, Matilda, and The Little Mermaid.

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[jenmedsbookreviews]

Yes folks. Like a large proportion of the country I got snowed in on Sunday. Yippee. At least for Sunday as I could stay snuggled under a blanket reading. Less yippee if this is what I am faced with trying to get to work on Monday … by the time you read this I’ll either have made it or not. We shall see.

Better week this week. Dragged myself down to London on Monday and attended the final First Monday Crime panel of the year which was a fun and moderately festive affair. So great hear from the panel of Louise Jensen, Mel McGrath, Susi Holliday and Chris Whitaker alongside chair Claire McGowan. This was followed by some top (?) crime writers pitching their slightly unusual story ideas to the audience. It was … an experience. I’m hoping none make it into print …

It was great to be able to get to the pub afterward and catch up with a few bookish folk including Jacob, Victoria, Joy, Amer, Tracy, Gabriela, Alex, Keshini, Roz, Vaseem, Linda, Katherine, Graham, Susi and Mel, as well as Mr Whitaker who was handing out hugs left right and centre. I’m sure I’ve probably missed scores of folk for which I apologise but it was a very busy night and I had to leave in a rush to catch my train or I’d be stranded in London all night. It was a bit like Cinderella only older, fatter, no fairy support and I managed to keep hold of both of my shoes …

I did pick up a couple of books on the day. One was a purchase from Waterstones, a signed copy of Robert Bryndza’s The Girl In The Ice. Seemed rude not to as I was in London. I also couldn’t resist grabbing a copy of All The Wicked Girls while I was at the panel and forcing Mr W to sign it. Cause, ya know, he’s so backward in coming forward … 😉

Book post wise this was an epic week. First up my two outstanding purchases from Goldsboro turn up. Yay. They were the CWA Anthology (Signed) and my signed copy of Whiteout by Ragnar Jonasson. I’m even quoteed in Whiteout so this is a super smiley book for me. On top of these I received arcs of Games with the Dead by James Nally; The Chalk Man by CJ Tudor;  Fault Lines by Doug Johnstone; Blue Night by Simone Buccholz; and Kiss Me, Kill Me by James Carol.

E-book wise I was sent a new novella from Julia Roberts, Christmas at Carol’s which I’ll be reviewing this week.

I also got a couple of books on Netgalley – Let Me Lie by Clare Mackintosh and We Own The Sky by Luke Allnut.

Not a bad bookhaul of a week I guess. Reading wise I finished two books and two novellas so I’ll take that.

Books I have Read

My Sweet Friend by H.A. Leuschel

A stand-alone novella from the author of Manipulated Lives

A perfect friend … or a perfect impostor?

Alexa is an energetic and charismatic professional and the new member of a Parisian PR company where she quickly befriends her colleagues Rosie and Jack. She brings a much-needed breath of fresh air into the office and ambitiously throws herself into her new job and friendships. 

But is Alexa all she claims to be? 

As her life intertwines with Rosie and Jack’s, they must all decide what separates truth from fiction. Will the stories that unfold unite or divide them? Can first impressions ever be trusted?

In this original novella, H.A. Leuschel evokes the powerful hold of appearances and what a person is prepared to do to keep up the facade. If you like thought-provoking and compelling reads with intriguing characters, My Sweet Friend is for you.

A really interesting and quick read, this book looks at the power of friendship and what happens when one of a pair uses manipulation to get what they want from life. I don’t want to give away too much more about the book as it’s only around 100 pages, but you can read my full review here and buy the book here 

…

A Game Of Ghosts by John Connolly

It is deep winter. The darkness is unending.

The private detective named Jaycob Eklund has vanished, and Charlie Parker is dispatched to track him down. Parker’s employer, Edgar Ross, an agent of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, has his own reasons for wanting Eklund found.

Eklund is no ordinary investigator. He is obsessively tracking a series of homicides and disappearances, each linked to reports of hauntings. Now Parker will be drawn into Eklund’s world, a realm in which the monstrous Mother rules a crumbling criminal empire, in which men strike bargains with angels, and in which the innocent and guilty alike are pawns in a game of ghosts . . .

Finally!!! I am a very bad blogger. Should have read this months and months and moths ago but I never quite made it. Would never have forgiven myself if it had come to year end and it was still outstanding. Charlie Parker back at it;s thrilling and supernatural best this has a wonderful blend of the brilliant storyline and also emotional moments which make me very very happy. My review will be posted this week but you can buy a copy of the book here.

…

Christmas at Carol’s by Julia Roberts

An uplifting tale of people’s desire to help each other in the season of goodwill – a romantic comedy with a twist in the tale.

Carol fell in love with Wisteria Cottage the moment she laid eyes on it and moved in two weeks before Christmas hoping it would be start of a new more positive period in her life. 

On her first night in her new home she discovers an old Christmas card to someone called Annie with a heart-breaking message inside from Jake. 

Although she doesn’t know them, and despite being on a self-imposed dating break herself, Carol begins planning how she can bring them together, while her new neighbour, Sally, is attempting a bit of matchmaking of her own. 

What a wonderfully uplifting novella. Very festive and very romantic I’ll be sharing my thoughts with everyone later this week. This is the perfect story of family, friendships, love lost and love found, just set to get you in the mood for Christmas. You can pre-order a copy of the book here.

…

Foul Trade by B.K.Duncan

It is March 1920. May Keaps, the Poplar Coroner’s Officer, has never failed to provide a jury with sufficient evidence to arrive at a just verdict.

The poverty, drunken fights between visiting sailors, drug trafficking, and criminal gangs, haunting the shadows of the busiest docks in the world, mean that the Coroner sees more than its fair share of sudden and unnatural deaths.

May relishes the responsibility placed upon her but there are many who believe it’s an unsuitable job for a woman. Even May begins to wonder if that is the case when the discovery of a young man’s body, in a Limehouse alley, plunges her into an underworld of opium dens, gambling, turf wars, protection rackets and murder.

As her investigations draw her into danger, it becomes increasingly clear that whoever is responsible intends to avoid the hangman’s noose by arranging to have May laid out on one of her own mortuary slabs. 

I read the prequel novella for this series a few weeks ago and I knew then that May Keaps was going to be quite an intrepid kind of gal. I wasn’t wrong. An intriguing mystery led by May who works as a Coroner’s Officer, she is quite relentless in her pursuit of the truth and a key example of an early version of girl power. My review will be up tomorrow and you can order your own copy of the book right here.

…

That was it reading wise, and to be fair I’ve not been much busier on the blog with a handful of reviews and a lot of #bookvent.

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 4

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 5

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 6

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 7

#BlogTour: Anything for Her by G.J. Minett

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 8

Review: My Sweet Friend by H.A. Leuschel

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 9

The #Bookvent Calendar 2017: Day 10

Review: Dark Skies by LJ Ross @LJRoss_author

The week ahead is equally laid back I’ve blog tour reviews today for Carol Wyer’s��The Silent Children, and tomorrow for Angelina Kerner’s Follow The Snowflakes and BK Duncan’s Foul Trade, plus Rachel Sargeant’s The Perfect Neighbours this weekend. Alongside that will be the next seven days in my #bookvent countdown.

Hope you all have a warm and book filled week. I’m off to Dublin again on Wednesday for the final time this year so plenty of reading time for me. See you next time.

Jen

          Rewind, Recap: Weekly Update w/e 10/12/17 Yes folks. Like a large proportion of the country I got snowed in on Sunday. Yippee. At least for Sunday as I could stay snuggled under a blanket reading.

[p-artsypants]

P-Artsypants Fanfiction Masterpost!

I feel like I’m always making a new one of these posts every few months, but I honestly just write so much that it makes sense...

Updated so most recent Fandom is at the top. 

Find most, if not more, of these fics on:

Fanfiction.net | Archive of Our Own | Wattpad

 (~AU’s, *Finished, ❤️Author's Favorites)

Kingdom Hearts

~❤️Rage Awakened AO3 | FF.net- Ten years ago, Terra, Aqua, and Ventus lost their fellow apprentice, Sora, in Deep Jungle. Now, they are to return with two new students, Riku and Kairi, to lock the heart of the world. All the while, something watches from the trees. Feral!Sora AU

My Kingdom for a Heart AO3 | FF.Net - The curse of being one of the Princesses of heart, is that there’s always someone out to get you. As Xemnas looked failure in the face, he reached out in a last ditch effort and destroyed Kairi’s heart. Now her friends must travel the worlds again. Sora, to find a way to recover Kairi’s heart, and Riku, to make amends to those he has wronged. All the while, the darkness grows.

Miraculous Ladybug

One Shots

*❤️Amalgam- When an young man is rejected for being ‘incompatible’ he turns into the akuma ‘Amalgam’ able to fuse two people together. And later Adrien and Marinette would debate if it was lucky or unlucky that they got hit.

*Sing We All Noel- After receiving the worst Christmas present ever from his father, Chat Noir finds himself out on the streets with nowhere to go on Christmas Eve. Thankfully, Ladybug finds him and brings him home.

*Speechless- In a world where everyone has a soulmark, the first words their soulmate will say to them, Marinette is born without one. But Adrien Agreste has two. Curious, considering he’s mute.

*❤️Tunnels of Love- The night started out with an accidental kiss from Adrien Agreste, and ended with her bleeding in the Catacombs of Paris. Ladybug, the wielder of the miraculous of good luck. Yeah right. (Some blood)

*The Reveal That Wasn’t- First Parts My ending to kittybug’s Tumblr Prompt

*What A Mess We’re In- Ladybug has a lot on her mind, and when Chat Noir bugs her enough, she tells him she’s going to confess to her Crush, Adrien Agreste. Chat’s reaction is not what she’s expecting.

Long Fics

*❤️Nine Lives- (FF.net) When Adrien Agreste is scheduled to go to a Military School in Germany, Chat Noir must make a critical decision. Does he give up his Miraculous? Or does he give up his life as Adrien? I’ll save you the trouble of guessing, he gives up being Adrien.

*Tender Words- When Marinette finally gets the guts to confess her feelings for Adrien, some things go so wrong, and other things go so right.

How To Train Your Dragon

One Shots

The Vikings Have Their Tea (FF.Net | AO3)

Arranged Marriage- Takes place at the beginning of HTTYD

❤️Breathe- Survival of the fittest

~Childhood Friends- At the Sandbox

❤️Easy Fix- In which Hiccup has a bad day

~Fashion Designer- Astrid needs a fill in

❤️Frozen- In Which Astrid takes a Dip and things get frisky (Rated M)

❤️Headache- In Which Hiccup hits his head….really hard

❤️Heir- In Which Hiccup is Picked (Longer version by FateCharms) 

Illness- In Which Stoick is a dad

~Illusionist- Trick gone wrong

~In the Walls- In which there’s a poop ghost

~Knocking On The Wrong Door (2) - A chance encounter

❤️Messages- Astrid is Frustrated with Hiccup’s obliviousness

~To Mirkwood- Hiccup is not a dwarf

~Monster Falls- Hiccup and Astrid take a dip

❤️Mute- In which there’s a quiet stranger

~Music Video (ImgHS)- He didn’t expect it

❤️Operation: Lovebirds- In Which the gang makes a plan, and Hiccup gets Drunk

~Over- Too many nightmares

~Partners in Crime- A normal day at work

~Pirate- Astrid is the greatest treasure

~Prince- He doesn’t want to be a broken King

❤️Sorting Things Out- In Which Astrid gets her ducks in a row

~The Dragon and The Dame- Beauty and the Beast Au

The Pit- In Which Hiccup is rescued

Hide and Seek- Part 1

Lost and Found- Part 2

Long fics: 

*❤️Infernal Responsibility- Being the son of the chief takes brains, courage, and a lot of patience. But at his father’s the request for marriage, Hiccup decides he has had enough. When he seeks out a life of ease, he runs into more than what he bargained for. 

*❤️Roses and Lilies- “Astrid, you and I both know you’re much tougher than I am. You’re more brave, and a better fighter…but just for a little while…could we pretend that I’m the one protecting you?” “Oh gods yes!”

*~What the Water Gave Me- The sea is a wild and dangerous thing, something that cannot be foretold or predicted. Hiccup discovered this many years ago, in human naiveté. Yet, what was meant as a sacrifice became a new life, one like no one could comprehend. He now finds himself once more in the unknowing hands of those that sentenced him to death. He only prays things will be different this time. Merman!AU

*Parasite- Soulsnatcher Dragons are rare but deadly. But, As Hiccup finds out, it’s the eggs you have to watch out for.

*~320 State Street- Gobber’s Goods. A Hardware Store that was rumored to have everything you needed. She thought she only needed a job. Turns out, she needed a lot more than that. (A Modern AU no one asked for)

*~❤️The North Tower- When Finn Hofferson died, Astrid inherited his castle in Wales…and a whole lot more. Something sinister lurks in the North Tower.

*~❤️Boy Toy- AO3 - At the age of 21, Princess Astrid lawfully has to pick a husband. But when the perfect groom is nowhere to be found, she requests the toymaker to create one for her. It’s safe to say that everyone in the kingdom is a little concerned. (Pinocchio!AU I guess?)

No, You Go First- AO3 - The Chief of Berk was a headstrong viking, stubborn and full of pride, and willing to do whatever it takes to keep his village safe. But for a moment, he puts that aside, and listens to his son. In which Hiccup convinces his dad not to make him go through Dragon Training, and the subsequent changes that follow.

*In Due Time- AO3 - As another illness sweeps through Berk, Gothi needs another ingredient for her medicine…one that doesn’t exist anymore. Fortunately, she kept that old spell book around for such an occasion. Big Hiccup is sent to five years into the past, and his younger self sent to take his place in the future. But it’s only a few days, what could go wrong?

Trollhunters: Tales from Arcadia

❤️Arcadia or Bust- In Which Arcadia welcomes back it’s underground citizens.

Teen Titans

Oneshots:

~Big Brother- Don’t turn out the light (Horror)

Dear Jason- Bruce Writes a letter

Just Drawing- Bruce thinks about Robin

The Prisoner- Starfire is Guilty

Of Mustard and Three Foot Purple Tongues- A collection of Oneshots and Drabbles

Long Fics (*Finished): 

*~❤️Carol of the Bells- High in the dark Bell Tower of Notre Dame, there lives a mysterious bell ringer. Legend tells of the angel who fell from the sky, and the curse she bares. There are few who know her true identity though; her master, the priest, and the acrobat that performs on the streets below. Based loosely on ‘The Hunchback of Notre Dame’ RobxStar and slight BBxRae

*No Escape- Three years ago, Starfire escaped an Alien race called the Gordanians, to arrive on Earth. They’re back, and ready to put Starfire back where she belongs, behind reinforced Titanium bars. Robin’s not about to let her go…if only he hadn’t got captured first. How does it feel to be the alien, Robin?

*Now you Know My Pain- When the new Villain, Gender Bender, comes to down, the Titans find themselves in an odd situation. They’ve been turned into the opposite gender against their will! Now in order to change back, they must learn to understand the gender they’ve turned into. Rated T for obvious reasons. A great read if you’ve ever wondered why girls or guys do [blank].

*Paint it Black- Robin disappeared three months ago. Now, Jump City’s crime rate is mysteriously being taken care of by a normal, albeit strange, teenage boy who goes by the name Black. As the Titans befriend this lunatic, they begin to see a relation between him and their missing leader. Will they be able to find Robin, or will Black turn them all insane as himself? Actually, contains NO OC.

*Saving Grace- “When I’m done with you, you won’t be able to walk upright or speak coherent sentences and all you’ll see is my mask and my voice repeating in your head…Weak. Richard Grayson, I am not tough, I am everything that you fear.” Happy Ending! Smudge of RobStar. NO Slash!

Other Fandoms

Final Fantasy XV

❤️Requiem for Pitioss-“O King. The god’s have heard your cries. Know that we weep with you. The Oracle’s calling has not yet been fulfilled. But…Lunafreya as you know her cannot return the way she was.” Noctis looked up, hopeful. “But she can return!” Canon divergence from Chapter 9. Happy ending. Some spoilers.

Beauty and the Beast

*❤️Behold the Beast- A Oneshot alternate ending to the Animated Film

Cinderella

*❤️Midnight- “When the clock strikes twelve, the spell will be broken,” the fairy godmother had warned. A retelling of the story, when Cinderella doesn’t escape the ball in time. Oneshot

*So This is Love- What if Jaq and Gus hadn’t made it in time to help Cinderella? A new twist on the ending of the classic Fairytale, and what lies beyond the story. She still gets her happy ending and her Prince, and her step family gets their just deserts.

Sleeping Beauty

*❤️A Love Song Back To Me- Maleficent saw the loophole that stared her in the face. Prince Phillip would break the curse in time, for sure. After all, he was betrothed to Aurora. So in an effort for her evil plan to stay in action, Maleficent takes care of the young prince herself. Phillip never imagined having to live off the land like the birds above. Alternate twist on the classic Disney tale.

Escaflowne

Down Feathers- Hitomi’s depressed. She’s been away from Van too long, he comes back to visit her…but what if something went wrong with the transfer? (Not finished. Never will be finished. Mwahaha) Circa 2012 

*Angel’s Wounds- Fanelia’s been victorious in their most recent battle with Basrum. Unfortunately, someone is wounded and just seeks solace in his love that lives so far away. Post Anime.

Momma Look Sharp- With the war between Fanelia and Basrum finally coming to a close, the kingdom is celebrating. The young king, however, is suffering from an experience unlike any he had before. Van finally seeks solace in his wife.

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten: Special Commemorative Bonus Edition

Bonus Top Ten: Top 100 Films of My Lifetime Revisited

I’ve been doing this now for 300 weeks, which is ridiculous. It started out as something that was fifty percent narcissistic desire to squirt my opinions all over the internet and fifty percent ongoing writing exercise; it’s since become a slightly embarrassing obsession. It’s often very hard to find something to write about, and often much harder to find the time to write constructively or entertainingly about it; that’s why so many of these lists are regrettably free of analysis or reasoning. I have, for a while now, kept a spreadsheet listing every Top Ten I’ve ever done, and I pride myself that I’ve never, ever missed a weekend (although once or twice the Top Ten has gone up on a Bank Holiday Monday).

Despite all this rampant creativity and rigorous record-keeping, I’ve made a couple of boo-boos here and there. Whether it’s a blessing or a curse, one of the consequences of not really having an audience to speak of (I am, essentially, howling these lists into the abyss) is that there’s no one to really come back and tell me I’m wrong – or that I have, ahem, literally done the same list twice.

In February 2014, for my 99th Top Ten, I listed my ten favourite films released in 1999. That made sense, thematically; and also it was a fairly non-intensive list to produce the week before I went crazy and did a Top 100 (Christ, I’m never doing that again). And then, in January 2016, for my 199th list, I, er, did exactly the same thing again. For pretty much exactly the same reasons. Er.

In order to rectify this outrageous error – and give you, my loyal and invisible readers, value for money – I have decided to produce a bonus free-of-charge Top Ten. And! Because this is – once again – an anniversary, I have gone absolutely bonkers. You’re not getting a Top Ten! You’re not getting a Top Twenty! And you’re definitely not getting a Top 300! Nope, I’m returning to (almost) the scene of the crime, and revisiting the Top 100 Films of My Lifetime, which I last did in February 2014.

So, specifically, this covers films released between January 1st 1982 and November 30th 2017 (yes, not exactly the full spectrum of my life, but sue me). I referred to the original list of three years ago, briefly, just to remind myself of some of my choices; but I then disregarded it entirely and produced the new list from scratch. There will no doubt be egregious omissions (to say nothing of egregious emissions). There will be films forgotten. And films unduly promoted because I like one particular bit. Sadly, there is no Phantom Menace. Sorry, Jar-Jar.

And I guess that’s all there is to it. I’ve not even posted the list yet and I’m certain I’ll disagree with it. If you ask me tomorrow whether I seriously think Edward Scissorhands is better than Dunkirk, I don’t know what I’ll tell you. But art is subjective, even within one’s own narrow frame of reference; things resonate at different times and in different ways. I’d forgotten about The Iron Giant for ages until I stumbled upon the “Superman” scene on YouTube a few years ago, and it has now vaulted towards the higher echelons of my opinion, because it makes me cry for a dozen different reasons (making me cry is a good way to get me to like a film; for some reason I’ve seen What Dreams May Come twice, and bawled like a punctured baby both times, meaning I can’t quite hate it, despite itself).

Anyway. 36 years (just about). 100 films. Knock yourselves out.

E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial (1982)

WALL-E (2008)

Pulp Fiction (1994)

Die Hard (1988)

Ghostbusters (1984)

L.A. Confidential (1997)

Schindler's List (1993)

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

Jurassic Park (1993)

Back to the Future (1985)

Goodfellas (1990)

The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001)

Toy Story 2 (1999)

Blade Runner (1984)

Moulin Rouge! (2001)

The American President (1995)

Groundhog Day (1993)

The Matrix (1999)

The Incredibles (2004)

Heat (1995)

Fight Club (1999)

The Hudsucker Proxy (1994)

Trainspotting (1996)

Fargo (1996)

The Usual Suspects (1996)

Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991)

Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

Captain America: Civil War (2016)

Leon (1996)

Reservoir Dogs (1992)

John Carpenter's The Thing (1982)

The Lion King (1994)

Inception (2010)

Inside Out (2015)

Good Will Hunting (1997)

The Silence of the Lambs (1991)

Aliens (1986)

The Terminator (1984)

The Sixth Sense (1999)

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)

Blade Runner 2049 (2017)

Beauty and the Beast (1991)

Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003)

The Iron Giant (1999)

Arrival (2016)

There Will Be Blood (2008)

The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

The Dark Knight (2008)

Amelie (2001)

The Talented Mr Ripley (1999)

William Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet (1996)

Coraline (2009)

Children of Men (2006)

Munich (2005)

Hot Fuzz (2007)

The Truman Show (1998)

Pan's Labyrinth (2006)

Batman: Mask of the Phantasm (1993)

Iron Man 3 (2013)

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)

The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002)

The Descent (2005)

Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004)

Gravity (2013)

In Bruges (2008)

Seven (1995)

Avengers Assemble (2012)

Brick (2005)

Donnie Darko (2001)

Aladdin (1992)

Let the Right One In (2008)

Toy Story 3 (2010)

Strictly Ballroom (1992)

No Country for Old Men (2007)

RoboCop (1987)

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Saving Private Ryan (1998)

Heathers (1988)

Moana (2016)

American Beauty (1999)

Evil Dead 2 (1987)

Zootropolis (2016)

Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)

Gremlins (1984)

The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982)

Shaun of the Dead (2004)

Out of Sight (1998)

Logan (2017)

Skyfall (2012)

The Bourne Identity (2002)

Jackie Brown (1997)

Edward Scissorhands (1990)

Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon (2000)

Dunkirk (2017)

Beetlejuice (1988)

Toy Story (1995)

Les Misérables (2012)

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)