#Kinda suicidal bad

[macbethz]

was it because of you?

s8 deb attempted murder-suicide by car scene is bad. but the version of it i invented in my head? you cant even imagine

[lgbtlunaverse]

Thinking of the Nie disciple that told Nie Mingjue it was Meng Yao who stayed behind to clean up corpses on the battlefield today.

Nie Mingjue didn't just randomly stumble upon poor lil meowyao eating bread in the novel, he was already looking for him to thank and reward him for his work.

That's what makes it so fun that nieyao's first conflict will end up being about someone else taking credit for Meng Yao's work.

And I'm sure that Nie Mingjue's actual opinions on plagiarism are a lot more nuanced, all we really get from him in this scene is "well you shouldn't kill someone over it!" which leaves a lot of room for what punishments he thinks are appropiate. But I bet that it isn't occuring to him in this moment that the only reason he knows Meng Yao at all, the only reason he got such a capable deputy, is that he noticed someone was taking care of the dead and cared enough to want to know their name. And then the Nie disciples didn't lie to him. The disciple he asked could have said "it was me, Zongzhu" to rise in the ranks himself, but he didn't. He went and asked others, who all also could have taken the credit, but they didn't. Someone saw Meng Yao working and decided to be honest about it and that simple decision is the catalyst for Meng Yao becoming Nie Mingjue's deputy.

Meng Yao can't just work hard to get results, others have to acknowledge that work. If they don't, it's as if he didn't do anything at all.

[tangledinink]

"it just seems inhumane to lose this much."

[thicctails]

Mabel's Second Chance

[Trigger Warnings: major character death, suicide(mentioned)]

~~~This is a little ficlet explaining how IGM!Ford and IGM!Mabel met! IGM!Mabel is from a timeline where Dipper never figured out how to use the sock puppet to talk to Mabel, and ended up being trapped in the Mindscape.~~~

Mabel had always believed that she was a good sister.

Sure, she teased Dipper sometimes, poking fun at his crush on Wendy and spraying him with the hose when he didn't shower often enough, but she never took it too far. She loved Dipper more than anything, after all!

But... she hadn't really been showing that lately.

She'd been caught up in a lot of summer romances lately, and Dipper had always been willing to help her out, going out of his way to make her happy, and protecting her if things went bad. Mabel had been sure that, if something had been as important to Dipper as love had been to her, that she would be happy to return the favor.

But then Dipper had asked for her help, had asked Mabel to help him unlock the secrets of the weird laptop they'd found in the Bunker, but instead of keeping her promise, she'd fallen head over heels for a pretty blonde with puppets and once again asked him to help her instead, reassuring him that she'd help him soon. And, ever the good brother, Dipper had agreed, stitching and cutting and gluing and scripting alongside Mabel and the rest of her production crew, fighting through his own exhaustion.

Then, when everything was ready, Mabel had told Dipper that he would finally have her help, and he'd given her a tired, grateful smile. Looking back on it, he'd probably been excited to finally get some sleep while she worked on figuring out the password.

Then Gabe had shown up, had made her panic over the stitches in her puppets, and she'd thrown Dipper aside in favour of her project, leaving him to stomp off in frustration. She'd ignored him, too caught up with her need to impress her crush.

She hadn't seen him again until she'd yelled that she was talking his journal. God, why had she done that? She knew how important it was to Dipper, and it wasn't as if she was lacking in books to choose from! But no, the journal had been there, and she had been in a rush, and she hadn't been thinking about Dipper's feelings, hadn't been thinking about Dipper much at all.

If she had been, perhaps she might have noticed her twin's too-wide smile, might have noticed the soda dripping down his irritated eyes, or the puncture marks on his bruised arm that were beginning to bead with blood.

She'd sat with him in the car, sat with the thing that had stolen her brother's body, and hadn't even noticed something was wrong.

It made her sick to think about now.

He'd spoken to her at the show, holding himself strangely but offering, quite sweetly, to help with the play, not looking mad in the slightest that she'd broken her promise and taken his journal.

She should have known something was wrong. Dipper hated performing in front of people. How had she not seen it?

Everything had gone perfectly. The lights, music, and live pyrotechnics had gone off without a cinch, and Gabe had asked her out officially at the end of the performance. She'd been so giddy that she hadn't even noticed Dipper's absence until Grunkle Stan had asked her where he'd run off too.

She hadn't realized something was wrong until they'd gone outside to look for him, and the smell of something burning had reached her nose.

It was hard to tell what it was at first, what with the amount of damage, but the blackened eyeglass and the curling six-fingered gold hand with the number 3 made it unmistakable. Dipper's journal, his most valued item, was smoldering on the ground next to a discarded lighter.

A cold, nauseous feeling had started to form in Mabel's stomach at the sight. She'd looked up at her Grunkle Stan, and had seen his face was twisted in shock and worry. He'd looked at her and asked her, in a strained, shaky voice, if she was sure she hadn't seen where her brother had gone.

They didn't find out where Dipper was until the next morning, when they got a knock at the door from an uncharacteristically somber Sheriff Blubs and a teary eyed Deputy Durland. Mabel had been sent up to her room, but she'd quietly snuck back down to listen in, desperate to know what was happening with Dipper.

After she heard the word "suicide," she'd stopped listening, unable to hear anything past the ringing that had filled her ears.

Mabel ran her thumb gently against the redone stitches of the sock puppet likeness of her brother as she hugged it close, burying her face in its tiny cloth hat, ignoring the way it's googly eyes dug slightly into her cheeks.

It smelled like him now, something that wasn't surprising, what with how much she'd brought it with her to lay down in Dipper's bed. It was hardly a nice smell; her brother really had needed to shower more, but it was familiar, and that was all that mattered to Mabel now.

Mabel's eyes fluttered open as she heard the door to the attic creak open. Beside her, Waddles nosed at the edge of the blanket she'd pulled over the two of them, and a sliver of orange-pink light pierced the comforting darkness of Blanket Town. He grunted a few times in greeting, but didn't pull away from his owner.

She heard soft footsteps getting closer and closer, until they stopped almost right beside her, and a familiar face came into view.

"Hi Soos." Mabel mumbled, her face still pressed into the fabric of the puppet. Soos smiled at her, but it was a sad smile, one that did nothing to distract from the wet shine in his eyes, or the unmistakable shudder in his next intake of breath.

"Hey hambone. How are you feeling?"

Mabel sniffed and ducked her head into Waddles' back, fresh tears beginning to pool in her eyes. She tried to answer, but nothing came out. Soos let out a quiet sigh.

"Yeah, I thought that might be the case." he gently patted her head through the blanket, "I think I know a way to make you feel better, if you're up for it, dude?"

Mabel glanced back up at the handyman, doubtful. What could possibly make her feel better.

"What is it?" she warbled hoarsely.

"It's kinda hard to explain, but if you come with me, I promise it'll be worth it." Soos replied, holding out his hand. Mabel hesitated, trying to decide if she even had enough energy to get up, but slowly she took Soos hand, letting him guide her to her feet, her Dipper sock puppet still held firmly in her grasp. Waddles dutifully followed her, pressing close to her legs.

Now that she was up and standing in the illuminated room, she noticed that Soos looked... different. He was missing his hat, and there was a healing gash on his cheek. He had a long, black bandana tied around his neck, as well as Dipper's dino tooth. Confused, Mabel looked back at place where her brother had hung it before, and... found it resting there, untouched. She whipped her head back and stared at Soos, who followed her gaze and then met her stare.

"Look, I know this is weird. Trust me, its weird for me too, dude. But I can explain everything in a bit." Soos said, holding his hands up in surrender. Mabel squinted her eyes in distrust.

"How do I know you're really Soos?" she asked.

"Oh, are you worried that I'm a shapeshifter? Uhh, oh, here!" Soos picked up his dinosaur tooth and pricked his finger on its sharp tip, a drop of bright red blood welling up, "See? 100% human dawg."

He wiped the blood on his bandana, giving Mabel another, less saddened smile. "I'm totally Soos, just... not your Soos."

"Wha?" Mabel's eyes widened, but she still followed the handyman when he started heading for the exit, "What do you mean you're not my Soos?"

"Doctor Pines can explain it better than I can. Just follow me and, uh, try not to wake up Stan. He... really looks like he needs the rest, dude."

Doctor Pines?

Still confused but also curious, Mabel crept down the stairs with the other Soos, careful not to step on any particularly squeaky floorboards as they made their way towards the door. Other Soos hadn't been wrong; Grunkle Stan looked worse than Mabel felt. He looked far older than he was, and his face was pinched with discomfort even in sleep. He was slumped over in his recliner, surrounded by crumpled up papers with scrawled writing on them and an empty bottle of alcohol. It looked dusty, like it hadn't been touched in a while.

Mabel scooped up one of the papers as they snuck past, glancing at it. It looked like he was trying to figure out what to tell their parents. She grimaced and dropped the paper like it had burned her. No wonder there were so many. How could anyone find the words to tell someone that their son had killed himself?

Except, Dipper hadn't killed himself. It hadn't been Dipper that had thrown himself off the water tower,

it had been Bill.

Bill had been the one in her brother's body. He had done something and tricked Dipper when he was tired and vulnerable because she hadn't kept her promise.

Mabel gripped the sock puppet tighter and hurried out the door.

Cicadas and crickets sang out into the evening light as she and Other Soos stepped out onto the porch, chirping and screeching as if nothing was out of place in the world. A light breeze blew some of Mabel's hair into her eyes, the strands sticking to her tear-dampened cheeks. She reached a hand up and brushed it away, and when she opened her eyes again, she noticed a man standing by the treeline.

He was tall, about as tall as Grunkle Stan, and was dressed in a long black trench coat and a red turtleneck. He had one bright blue eye and one that was milky white and scarred, as well as a pair of thick, cracked glasses. The stranger was old, with a grey stubble and slightly darker hair that had a silver stripe running through it. The most startling thing about him, however, was the fact that his face looked almost identical to Grunkle Stan's.

"Soos, who is that?" she asked, looking up at him.

"That's Doctor Pines dawg. Mr Pines' twin brother." Other Soos replied.

Mabel's jaw dropped open. Her eyes grew as wide as saucers, and she stepped back slightly in shock.

"What?!" she yelled in as hushed a tone as she could manage, "Grunkle Stan has a twin?"

Other Soos scratched at the back of his neck, "It's a long story, but I'm sure he'll catch you up dude. He might look a little scary, and he's not the best people person, but... he really cares about his family. He's the whole reason we were able to come here."

Mabel looked back at the man, her other Grunkle, apparently, and their eyes met. He lit up when he saw her, his eyes crinkling the same way Grunkle Stan's did. He pushed off from the tree he was leaning against and walked over to the porch, kneeling down before Mabel as he extended a hand to her.

"Hello Mabel. I'm your Great Uncle Stanford. It's... it's a pleasure to get to meet you again." he said, speaking in a soft, gentle voice.

Mabel reached out and grabbed his hand on instinct, but froze up when she processed what exactly it was he'd said. "Wait, what do you mean you're my Grunkle Stanford. Grunkle Stan is inside!"

The man blinked owlishly, as if he'd just remembered something, "Ah, right. You don't know about Stanley taking my identity yet. Sweetheart, I am Stanford Pines. My brother took my name when I went missing 30 years ago so I didn't lose my house. His name is actually Stanley Pines."

Mabel's mind was quietly exploding in a fiery ball of glitter and question marks. How was this possible? Suddenly, she felt something move in her grasp, and she realized that she was still holding her Grunkle's hand. Looking down, she noticed something was off.

"You have six fingers!" she gasped, delighted, "that's a whole finger friendlier than normal!"

Wait...

"Did you write the journals?!" she screeched, forgoing any concept of personal space as she rushed right up to him. Her Grunkle gave her a proud grin and produced that oh so familiar book from a pocket inside his coat, looking just as old and millipede-bitten as it had before.

"Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" she squealed, "I have to tell Dipper, he's gonna fre-!"

Mabel's mouth slammed shut with a click, the memory of the past few days rushing back as her excitement fled. She couldn't tell Dipper anything anymore. Her eyes became shiny with tears as she looked down at the ground, pulling her sock puppet sibling into a tight hug.

"Oh sweetheart, come here." Grunkle Ford said, opening his arms as Mabel began to cry. She threw herself into his chest, sobbing when he wrapped his arms around her in a warm, secure hug.

"It- It's all my fault!" she sobbed, pressing her face into the fabric of his sweater. It smelled of thunderstorms and coffee, and it was almost like she was back in Sweater Town, "I- I ignored Dipper and I broke my promise and- and I didn't notice anything was wr- wrong with him! A demon was possessing my twin and I didn't even notice! I was too- too busy obsessing over a STUPID BOY! My brother is dead because I was SELFISH!"

"Shhh, shhh, my dear, it is not your fault. Bill has had trillions of years to perfect his craft of tricking people. You couldn't have been expected to win against him." Grunkle Ford soothed, gently rubbing her back as she wailed and hiccuped, "I'm here now, and I'm going to make everything all okay."

"H- how?" Mabel sniffed, swiping her sleeve across her face as new tears ran down her cheeks. Grunkle Ford tapped the space on his coat that was above his heart, and Mabel saw two familiar symbols stitched onto the fabric. It was the pinetree from Dipper's hat, and the Shooting Star from one of her favourite sweaters.

"You see Mabel, I'm not from this dimension. Neither is Soos here." he said, gesturing to the handyman, "In my dimension, there was an... accident, and I lost my Dipper and Mabel, and I was very close to losing my brother. I wasn't able to live without you and your brother, so I decided to journey out into the Multiverse and find a version of you two that needed help, and offer to bring them back with me."

The scarred man lay a hand on Mabel's shoulder, "Mabel, the choice to come with us is yours; I certainly won't force you, but I adore you and your brother, and I would certainly love for you to come be a part of my family. If you do, then we can go and rescue a Dipper that really needs a sister that will make him feel loved right now. You'll be together again, and I'll make sure you never have to worry about losing him."

"I-" Mabel struggled to draw in another breath, so overwhelmed by what she was hearing, "I can see Dipper again?"

Grunkle Ford nodded. "Yes, Mabel, you can. Everything will be okay again, if you come with us."

She wanted to say yes, God she wanted to say yes more than anything in the world, but something stopped her from agreeing right away.

"What about Grunkle Stan? He'll be all alone..."

"Oh, don't worry about him. I'll come back and bring him a Dipper and Mabel that need a Stan, and I'll make sure he's all better before I leave, okay?"

Mabel smiled at the reassurance and nodded, "Okay Grunkle Ford, I- I want to go with you, then."

Grunkle Ford gave the girl a huge grin and scooped her up into a loving embrace. Mabel giggled wetly as his stubble scratched at her face, and she wrapped her arms loosely around his neck.

"Waddles can come too, right?" she asked.

Grunkle Ford looked down at her pig, who oinked at him in return. "Hmm. Well, my dimension already has a Waddles but... yes, I suppose he can come. We'll just have to quarantine him for a bit and get him adjusted to our reality so he doesn't collapse our entire dimension if he touches his counterpart."

"Two Waddles?! Oooo I'm gonna knit them matching outfits!" Mabel squeaked, "Thank you, Grunkle Ford!"

"Of course, princess. Anything to make you happy." he said, reaching into his pocket to withdraw his portal device, "Now, let's go find your brother."

Mabel nodded. This was her second chance. She'd prove that she could be a good sister. She'd prove to Dipper that she loved him.

And this time, she'd keep him safe.

[orange-coloredsky-archive]

the "3000 year old child" trope has the possibility to be genuinely intriguing and could explore the way children are treated across time no matter their apparent level of intelligence. it could be funny it could be heartbreaking it could be horrific to think about. too bad 90% of it is just an excuse to be a creep. sad!

[mashmouths]

so i started this show and it just gets worse and worseeeee not only did it lift the romance subplot directly from twilight (and not well) but they also are trying to play the forbidden love angle hard in the fantasy racism vein except it's a "cross-species" relationship between the two whitest people i've ever seen in my life and there are three people of color in the whole (first season of the) show who aren't villains and it seems that every other episode (and sometimes ebery episode and sometimes twice an episode!) there is a man physically or magically subjugating a woman and i keep waiting for the big reveal at the end to be stolen from fucking rainbow rowell

[the-crimson]

I was just listening to some sad music while thinking about q!bbh and… the eggs changed him. They saved him in a sense. All of them.

When Bad first arrived at the island he was aimless and much like Foolish, looking for the next subject of entertainment. He was only out for himself and couldn’t be bothered to lend a helping hand to anyone.

Then he was given a little egg with a top hat and everything changed. He had someone vulnerable to look out for, to provide for, and suddenly he was given purpose. All of these little eggs were precious beyond words and everything was perfect until it wasn’t.

Charlie tried to murder Dapper right in front of Bad. That was the first time Bad felt fear in a long long time then a deep sadness settled in when he learned Juanaflippa had died and that’s what sent Slime on his rampage and everything suddenly felt so much more real. The illusion of perfection broke and Bad realized, truly realized, just what Dapper meant to him.

Juanaflippa was brought back but then a hat trick of tragedy strikes and Bad is forever changed. Bad has a chance to walk Tilin home but she chooses to go with Slime who accidentally kills her. Juanaflippa chooses to stay with Mariana and he accidentally kills her - again. And Trump dies of neglect alone in an empty house. (Cc!Bad mentioned on stream a while back that the admins had asked him if he could do Trump’s tasks but Bad didn’t realize how dire the situation was- he blames himself)

Within the span of 24 hours, three eggs died and Bad could have saved each of them. This is when everything changes for Bad’s character. This is where Bad vows that no egg was ever going to die of neglect again. This is when Bad started grinding to become the richest person on the server and ensured that all the eggs had maxed out armor at all times. These eggs dying the way they did is what created the Badboyhalo we knew.

Bad created the warp plate system in the sky so he’d be able to reach just about anywhere near spawn to save an egg if they went down. He is the one who discovered the true utility of warp stones and spread that information across the server. He is the one who informed everyone of the autoeat and XP pump functions of the backpack and set up all the eggs with infinite XP so their armor would never break.

He was so incredibly damaged by these eggs dying that he turned all his hyper vigilance towards protecting the remaining eggs even if he barely knew the parents or the eggs themselves. He would never say no to someone asking for help ever again.

Bad went from selfish and out for himself to the most selfless person on the server. He was a demon seeking entertainment in the wake of eternity and transformed into a servant of the people who gave his life again and again for others without question.

Getting Dapper primed Bad for change. Dapper was the crack in the stone that allowed the walls within him to shatter when Juanaflippa, Tilin, and Trump died. Ever since that tragic day, all of the eggs became part of Bad’s family.… and now they are gone.

Dapper and their siblings brought out the best of Bad. They saved him from a cycle of chaotic indifference. And now he’s alone again. Everything he’s done to protect them has been for nothing. Everything he’s changed, the steps he took towards healing millennia old traumas… all of that was for not.

Some wounds cut too deep to heal. Even with all the progress Bad made, he still valued his entire self worth on how useful he was to others, on protecting the eggs. Every time something happened to the kids, he took it as a personal failure. When Bobby died, he blamed himself for not going with them on the adventure. Now they are gone gone. They fled. They are somewhere Bad can’t follow. He failed them. He had one job and he failed.

It doesn’t matter what happens to him now. Getting them back is all that matters. Bad’s world has lost all vibrancy and he’s physically fading away. He doesn’t notice because he can’t let himself. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is getting them back. But even if he does… it’s already too late. He failed. He couldn’t protect them. He failed.

When the eggs come back changed (hatched?) all he will see is his failure. If he lives long enough to see his babies return, will they give him the strength to come back from this? Or will their presence give him the reassurance that… it’s okay. He doesn’t need to fight anymore. They are safe now. He can let go. One last goodbye.

Fuck man. I’ve been here since the beginning. Since the second day Bad had Dapper. I’ve watched almost every single stream since. I’ve watched Bad change in real time. I’ve watched Dapper and the other eggs change him. I stayed up until 3 am watching Bad bargain with god to save his son from an unfair death. I’ve watched Bad chase desperately across the map only to arrive moments too late to find Ramon’s corpse. I’ve watched him sit silently weeping while waiting for Jaiden and Roier to say their last goodbyes. I still remember his screams for Dapper when they were killed by pillagers. I remember them stranded in the snow tens of thousands of blocks from safety with no items no food Dapper couldn’t even speak. Terrified that it could end then and there.

The fact that this whole journey has lead us here. Bad is literally dying because he failed them. He failed them in a hundred different ways but this was the big one. This failure broke him. If Bad does end up dying dying at the end of this arc… that would both be the most narratively satisfying yet heart breaking thing that could possibly happen. The eggs saved him in a million different ways. It makes sense that they would also be the death of him.

Bad’s a demon and a grim reaper so I doubt he’d stay dead but I could see Dapper and friends going on a quest to bring him back from where ever demons/grim reapers go when they die. Maybe he’ll finally get some closure from the tragedies he’s left in his wake all throughout history. Maybe he’ll get a chance to truly start over with a clean slate.

Fuck now I’m thinking about Dapper having ti live through their dad sacrificing himself for them and their siblings. We know Dapper was borderline suicidal before being taken so just… Dapper seeing themself in Bad too late and not being able to save him. Killing himself for the greater good. Dapper refusing to accept that Bad is gone and spending every waking minute researching how to bring him back by any means necessary but knowing Bad would want them to move on, to live, to live, to live.

I have no idea where Bad’s character is going. I have no idea if he’s gonna go full villain and burn the server to destroy the federation. I have no idea if he’s gonna sacrifice himself and die trying to get the eggs back. I have no idea if his grief is literally killing him and he’s acting so desperate with the knowledge that he’s on borrowed time. All I know is cc!Bad is gonna take us on one hell of a ride and I can’t wait to see what happens next.

[shellxrls]

babe r u okay we haven’t seen you for ages :/

SORRY NONNIE. i feel like i shld do a clarification post cuz i've gotten a few asks and i feel kinda bad for leaving u guys in the dark 😭. i've just been putting this off cuz i've been tired and stressed coupled with other reasons (that i'll explain) that make me not want to publicly interact on this blog:

recently i've noticed such a large uprise in hate on this app (ranging from pro-israel/anti-palestine posts to mutuals outside of my fandoms being called aggressive slurs to ppl within the obx fandom consistently expressing opinions of dislike and resentment to authors for simply writing what they want) - also largely made up of anon asks with the foundation of racial or sexuality based hate (which i won't go into depth ab but ppl definitely pick and choose who to send hate to based on those factors - pisses me the fuck off more than anything bcuz i don't come on this app to be bombarded with racism and reminders of my racial perception in this world, regardless of whether its directed at me or mutuals).

another thing, (which ik has been said forever but continues to remain important), the lack of support and interaction for/with writers on this app is definitely very discouraging. i no longer feel supported by the community i've created and the truth is i need that interaction to keep writing and engage my motivation otherwise i feel like what i'm doing on this app is pointless.

no one logs onto this app to listen to me rant ab personal issues, and so i wont' go into extensive detail - but i've consistently used tumblr to escape my personal life, and the burdens and stress that come with. ofc i'm a writer, but wayyy beyond that this is intended to be my safe space where i can enjoy and simply be myself and let go of personal stress as well as interact happily w like-minded ppl. due to this, i've made an effort to take time out of my own life and duties to write and to interact because of the community. recently however i find myself more and more anxious to even open the app and look at my notifs, and whenever i do open the app i make myself feel bad by comparing myself to other writers - which is completely normal occasionally, but at this point its not as easy to shake considering all the factors listed above. its unfortunate to say but it simply hasn't felt worth it to be on this app and interact for while now for me.

before anyone says i'm being too sensitive or its my sole purpose to write - pls remember that this is entirely my blog, i can choose what my motivations are for being on this app and its not a stretch to kindly ask for more in terms of stopping hate and simply being more supportive if u do genuinely like an author and their works.

ultimately i've been both a fan/reader and a writer on this app for multiple years atp, i can understand both perspectives but i've honestly never felt this disconnected and upset ab a blog before. I understand that not everyone is to blame, and i'm sorry to those who've been kind & active supporters, but my public interactions have been limited and may continue to be bcuz i feel v unsure & stagnant atm.

the only 'exception' to this is my mutuals, i love them all obv and their works, & so i'm continuing to interact w them as per normal, and so i am active on the app & i'm definitely not entirely gone by any means. if anything i just need a few more days to reconsider, but we'll see.

[pkmoth]

having swap au thoughts. *slaps roof of claus* there's so much mental illness in this guy. im gonna blow up everyone in the room and then myself

[demodraws0606]

The very weird plays in Tsukasa and Rui's last event and how they can be analysed and the weird detail that links them together

I made a post about this before but it was poorly made (and also not really a theory or analysis it was just me having brainworms) so I deleted it and I want to actually make an analysis about it. Unfortunatly this also means this post will be long as fuck which can be a positive or a negative depending on how you view it.

Warning for mentions of suicide and drowning

So Tsukasa and Rui both have plays that are kind of the focus of the event, to the point where wxs literally stop to basically explain to us the plot of them (in world they're just talking about it but like it's clear it's also meant for us the viewers to understand the plays they're doing).

And these two plays are already very interesting and...well dark on their own but they have a extremely strange similarity that I don't believe is a coincidence (because that would be insane) and also just kinda shakes the foundation on how colorpalet write these sorts of topics in general.

First I want to preface this by saying that me analysing these plays isn't some kind of fool's herrand as colorpalet has explicitely hid backstory information, future lore hints and overall just little bits of character into WxS's plays more often than not. Of course some plays are more explicit than others.

A huge exemple of this, is the first arc ender where the play they do to save Phennyland is one that obviously is meant to parallel Emu's backstory with her grandpa. It also stands as Very early foreshadowing between the parallels of Emu's grandpa and Tsukasa that Emu sees in Admist a Dream.

So yeah, from a writing standpoint, makes sense you don't want the plays you spent a lot of words describing to the audience to be useless especially considering colorpalet has a limited amount of time to explore these stories.

I also want to get this as early as possible before I get possible criticism because I know how this fandom acts towards analysis that delve into darker topics. Don't try and respond with "colorpalet wouldn't write something like that" or "this is too dark for colorpalet". Not only because I'm not insinuating that they will actually go full dark mode and depict something graphic.

But also because this is something that is already IN the text, I'm not making up darker themes here, that is something that colorpalet chose to add in WonderlandXShowtime's event stories. I'm only bringing up how odd this is for colorpalet and how it could relate to the overall story.

I'll bring this up later because this specific criticism gets very silly once you delve deeper into it but I don't want to stall the analysis any longer.

So now with this out of the way, let's get into the plays.

This is the story of the first play showed in Tsukasa's event

Of course the first thing that stands out is how much darker this play is compared to well...almost anything colorpalet addresses in stories ? This definitely shocked when I first read it, there is no usage of "disappearing" and it Actually describes the method as to which the protagonist wants to end their life which the only thing close to that we see is Kanade hinting on wanting to starve herself. But I'm gonna get into how weird this is for colorpalet later.

Extremely dark topics aside you can easily draw parallels to this story to Nene and Rui specifically already. The story is vague enough that those parallels don't hold too much water (ahaha get it) BUT it's still something that I feel is important to point out nontheless.

Nene and Rui were both unsuccesful in their dreams before the main story. Nene having given up going on stage and Rui never being able to be a director being forced to use robots for his plays.

Both were pretty jaded and well "worn out" until they met Tsukasa and Emu which would be a stand in for the protagonist of this play going through various encounters with many people and deciding to live a little longer.

(The reason I don't compare this protagonist to Tsukasa and Emu here is because I don't think they fit as well. Tsukasa's issues wasn't being unsuccesful its more so him forgetting the reasons behind his dreams and Emu's situation while similar just doesn't feel like it fits this story in particular)

So yeah this story is pretty simple so there is not much to analyse or pick apart. I could go scene by scene but then I would be distracting from the main point I want to make so I'll just be using the simple descriptions of the overall story.

NOW this one is a doozie, I didn't put the whole story that's described but I think compared to the last one this one is way more obvious as to what this could paralleling (or even foreshadowing if you want to be spicy).

I don't think this play is meant to be interpreted in only one way but the most obvious interpretation is the parallels to the disbandement arc. I think it particularly fits Rui in the disbandement considering how Katsuyuki is described but it can also work with Emurui in general as well.

Someone struggling meeting someone who brings joy in their life before they seemingly have to leave, said person being desperate for that not to happen.

I do think it's also meant to be a sort of double meaning here as if you have seen my cyberpunk deadboy analysis, the idea of someone leaving silently with the other trying to chase them down is something that just feels...idk intentional. But I don't have any evidence other than vibes here.

Now that I analysed these plays I want to get into the one common thread they have that is extremely baffling and concerning.

They both have the main character contemplating suicide by drowning.

Now you can be nitpicky and point out how the play in Rui's event doesn't explicitely say that this dude wants to drown himself but I just find it more likely mostly because of how this and the description of Katsuyuki's characters are phrased.

When Katsyuki is said to be "without the will to live"

THAT is a literal translation

Unfortunatly I'm not a japanese speaker so don't take my research with 100 pourcent certainty

However if you look at how this sentence is phrased in japanese, this translation is pretty much word for word

And also just what Hajime says doesn't feel like what someone would say to someone if they're just leaning to close to look at the ocean or just being reckless.

Anyways now that I've made my point that there is a 95 pourcent chance this is Heavily implying Katsuyuki was plannign on drowning himself the question is....

what the fuck ?

Now one time is already a big deal considering colorpalet's insitance on censoring explicit mentions of suicide and for it to be implied twice in the span of two events in a row ? And have it be specifically be by drowning both times ?????

I don't understand people just brushing this off because Colorpalet Actively chose to make the plays like this. These plays often take a large portion of the screentime, and I've showcased how they can hold story significance so such a blatant connection between them feels extremely intentional.

This is why complaints about expecting Colorpalet to get too dark and that it's unrealistic would be legitmatly silly because what's more unrealistic ?

That colorpalet has tackled this dark topic twice in a row to foreshadow or hint at possible topics that will be addressed in the future of WxS's story ? Weither it's through flashbacks or implications like 25ji OR even just symbolism.

Or that colorpalet just went and made the plays needlessly dark, for no reason ?????? Twice in a row with it being drowning both times ??????? With the same actor and both being the protagonist of the play ?????? Have those plays that take a lot of screentime being described just being completely devoid meaning ???????

I think I made my case about why the fandom's usual kneejerk reaction wouldn't make sense here, this isn't a "X character is secretly suicidal/depressed" situation.

Either way, I actually don't legitematly know what this could entail. This is clearly important enough that colorpalet is obviously shoving it in our faces but I do not know the meaning of it towards WxS's story just yet.

It could be hints at some of the members backstory (BTW by that I mean it could be hints at basically anything, it doesn't have to be explicitely 1/1 "they wanted to drown themselves") specifically Rui considering how suspicious they are at handling ms Rui but that is it's own can of wringling worms. But that could also be my fav character bias speaking tbf.

It could also just be meant to be some kind of like, message of colorpalet saying that they are willing to go darker with WxS's storyline if necessary. In a way showing that the gloves are off if they're not censoring dark topics that they usually censor.

Anyways I'm not delving further into it because otherwise i'd get into unhinged rants but honestly this subject just gives me so much brainworms because legit what the Fuck is colorpalet doing rn.

They are being so weird for literally no reason with WxS's story and I just have to sit back and watch them just drop weird shit out of nowhere.

Edit : One of my friends pointed out how one of them is a movie and one of them is a play and i realised I might've mixed those words up while writing this so yeah 😭

[h-didanart]

Heeeeeyyyyyy guyssssssssss

So~

Do any of you wanna hear about the ✨”fun”✨ new concept I have for an au?

It’s Bloodmoon centered~

:)

[foryouthegays]

i think the problem is that im like happy to look how i look now--long hair, dresses kinda feminine, all that--but the thought of being perceived as a girl makes my blood curdle and theres no real getting around that. like i can try and convince myself to dress for myself all i want, i can reinforce my pronouns all i want, but people are still going to call me a girl and use she/her unless i drastically change the way i present myself which i also dont want to do

[henriiiii-1001]

some sketches for yall bc i promised i'd feed you

the first one w thea is gonna be a lil series where i draw all the characters in different outfits. i just wanted to give them some variety so they aren't stuck in the same clothes every time i draw them LOL

the second one w peter is actually a cropped version of the full sketch, but that's bc it has slight spoilers. plus, i liked how i drew him here!!! he looks super cool :DDDD (plz click on the image here bc it's actually a portrait pic, i just didnt wanna leave it by itself lol)

i have an extra sketch underneath the "keep reading" just in case bc it has implied suicide in it, so click only if you're comfortable

[silverwhittlingknife]

antigone. jean anouilh.

quotations from antigone: a tragedy by jean anouilh. translated by lewis galantière.

comic panels in order are from: battle for the cowl 3 (x3), batman annual 25, batman and robin 5, batman and robin 6, battle for the cowl 3, batman 416, battle for the cowl 3, battle for the cowl 2, batman annual 25, batman and robin 6, under the red hood, battle for the cowl 3 (x2), batman 427, lost days 5.

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

i'm kind of amazed how most of the stardew marriage candidates just want you to be their manic pixie dream whatever by agreeing with everything they like and plying them with compliments or praise or whatever (which is fine but a bit. Much) but for shane his romance is just you being there for him while he figures his own shit out... dunno why i never wanted to romance him before he's so good

[hauntedhowling]

Uh. Hi. I'm a schizophrenic autistic trans man, my husband is a physically disabled trans man. We are gonna be homeless this month. Please consider commissioning me or donating to my cashapp or paypal

My cashapp is $vwolfe my PayPal is vwolfe23