#Kentucky spiders

[achoirofcritters]

G r e e n

Some nature and macro photography taken here in Kentucky. Photos by me! Nikon D50

[vyva-melinkolya]

Louisville KY

[hardtickettohomevideo]

Schlocktoberfest XIV - Day 9: In Search Of...Bigfoot

You wanna go see Wizards again this weekend? I heard there’s a trailer for a new Sci-Fi movie that’s coming out next month that’s supposed to be pretty good. Cool, In Search Of is on. Let’s grok Spock.In Search Of…Bigfoot (April 28, 1977) The Entire Episode: *Spoilers Throughout*What’s This About: An old TV show from my youth where Spock was basically a precursor to Mulder and Scully. Here are…

[uxbridge]

🕸️🦂🕷️🐍🎃🍂

[elgaberino-mcoc]

THE PATILIO FROG SUIT has been added to the MCOC Wishlist

Leap-Frog (Vincent Patilio) and Frog-Man (Eugene Patilio) used the same suit for villainy and heroism, respectively. This listing is a vote for either.

Not to be confused with Frog-Man (Ani-Men) #MCOC @MarvelChampions

[mayflora-18]

Incorrect CoD Quotes #9

Price: There’s something wrong with the kid.

Laswell: Like what?

Price: *holds up a photo of a spider*

Roach: Ew.

Price: *holds up a photo of a cockroach*

Roach: Me.

Price: *holds up a photo of a lady bug*

Roach: *tips his helmet* Evening, ma’am.

Price: You see what I mean?

———

Roach: *sneaks into the barracks at 2am*

Price: *turns in a swivel chair* Care to to tell me where you were?

Roach: I was with… uh… Ghost!

Ghost: *also turns in swivel chair* Care to tr- *keeps spinning* uh Boss- I can’t stop the chair-

Roach: I meant… I was with Garrick.

Gaz: *turns on the light* Honestly Sanderson, you would think Roach would know how to be sneakier.

Roach:

———

Price, walking in: The training grounds are closed because of the ice storm.

Soap: Great! No training!

Soap: *looks out the window* Is Ghost still walking to the training grounds?

Soap: *opens window* HEY DIPSHIT, TRAINING’S CANCELLED!

Ghost: *looks around, confused* GOD?!

———

Ghost: Remember what I taught you.

Farah: The quickest way to a man’s heart is through the fourth and fifth ribs.

Alex: Ghost no!

———

Ghost: *can’t sleep because of nightmares*

Ghost: Listen to your therapist they said.

Ghost: You’ve been through a lot of trauma they said.

Ghost: *throws pillow* WELL YOUR BREATHING EXERCISES AREN’T WORKING NOW, ARE THEY DEBORAH!!

———

Rudy: I have a bad feeling about this.

Alejandro: What do you mean?

Rudy: Don’t you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you if something will get you into trouble?

Alejandro: No?

Rudy: That actually explains so much.

(This could work between Rudy and Soap too, honestly).

———

Nikolai: Physically I’m here but spiritually I’m lying in a Waffle House parking lot somewhere in rural Kentucky, slowly bleeding out from several stab wounds.

Sherlock: Mood.

———

Roach: I want to be a caterpillar.

Sherlock: Explain?

Roach: Eat a lot, sleep for a while. Wake up beautiful.

Sherlock: You know that they have a lifespan of, like, two weeks right?

Roach: That’s another highlight.

Soap: ROACH NO-

———

Sherlock: How do people just stay motivated their entire lives? What drives you? I got out of bed once and I’ve been exhausted ever since.

Ghost: You need to learn to hate life to the point where you want revenge on existence itself.

The rest of the 141:

Nikolai: *nods in agreement*

Roach: *furiously takes notes*

———

Soap: Is e seo do choire gu lèir.

Ghost: I know, I know.

Gaz: You know Gaelic??

Ghost: No, I just know the phrase “this is all your fault” in every language he speaks.

———

Roach: Sleeping is nice because you’re not exactly dead and you’re not awake so it’s a win-win situation.

Sherlock: It’s like being dead without the commitment.

Nikolai: An open relationship with death.

Farah: Death with benefits.

Ghost: An every night stand.

Meanwhile, everyone else in the background: *absolutely horrified*

———

*1am at 141 base*

Soap: If I drink Red Bull and NyQuil will I stay up or pass out?

Ghost: …Get off the fridge and go to bed like a normal human being.

*Later*

Ghost: SHERLOCK I HAVE A QUESTION!

Sherlock: Ghost what the fuck it’s 3am.

[swaps55]

List five topics you could talk about for an hour without prepping any material. (No one tagged me, I just saw this and wanted to.)

Equine foot management, catastrophic injuries, and laminitis. I can throw in club feet and foal deformities for fun. There will be drawings. I will do a lot of yelling.

Parking structure design and technology. My friends are known to send me photos of parking structures. Once, on a romantic getaway once with Real Life Romance Option, I dragged him to three different parking structures. Including one at 9pm because it had a cool glass spider on the facade that was lit at night.

Mass Effect, any aspect, but inevitably there will be a focus on the individual identities of all 3 games, misogyny, the different lenses through which people who played at launch vs. today view the trilogy, the Mako and the power of the UNC worlds in Mass Effect 1, and of course, the ending. If you ask a question about Andromeda you will have regrets because this just became two hours and Real Life Romance Option is on his upteenth AND ANOTHER THING because about 8 seconds into the infodump he joined in.

The Kentucky Derby/Triple Crown, which will most assuredly involve me lauding my namesake, insisting Nashua is a hack, and reciting Secretariat's Belmont race call. Also pretty guaranteed I will wander into horse racing at large and cry a lot about Serena's Song and Rachel Alexandra. Don't ask me about Barbaro unless you want this to be a double feature with #1.

Planning a Walt Disney World vacation. I literally talked to my folks about this impromptu for an hour yesterday. I have spreadsheets. And I am actually making a power point on the subject right now. The first slide header says, "Swaps, why is there a power point." Top answer is, "because it's fun."

Please feel free to share yours. :D

[olderthannetfic]

The anti in your inbox arguing that some stuff Japanese people write is illegal somewhere, therefore it is bad made me chuckle. It's illegal in my home state of Kentucky (the most cursed US state except Florida) to speak, hum, sing, skip, jog or dance if trans, because that is, legally speaking, grooming.

So if legality determines morality, does that mean speaking to you as I'm doing right now is bad? The anon said to check your local laws, after all. Not to think about them, not to ask if the law is based in logic, not to question what the reason behind the law is, not to ever go, "does fiction cause people to suddenly lose control of themselves and rape a child or is a grown ass adult to blame for the rape they committed?" or "does a trans person humming near a child turn them trans or is someone's gender unaffected by humming, given cis people hum near children regularly without turning them cis?"

Are you queer, anon? It's illegal in my dad's home country for queers to speak in the presence of unaccompanied minors, since that's a form of sexually soliciting the child there. That would include this blog. As we are to assume laws are always just and correct, then either you should adhere to that law if you were not a pedophile, which you didn't, or speak and thus prove you are one, which you did.

I fucking hate antis. They're so married to this idea that in the civilized world all the right things are banned that even though there's 491 proposed anti-queer laws in the US and that doesn't include ones that passed, they just keep repeating, "Legal good. Illegal bad."

It's legal to marry and fuck a child in many US states. It is illegal in many US states to own sex toys or have anal sex. By this logic, fucking a child is better than being queer, as it's more legal in some places.

I'm so tired. Antis, does it ever occur to you even once that jackasses can make laws and therefore laws shouldn't be trusted without hesitation or thought?

Each day I find new reasons to want Hobie Brown from Across The Spider-Verse to be real and this is one of them. Antis won't listen to "old" people like my 22 year old ass but Hobie is cis, young and hot. He could get through to them. Wherefore art thou, Spider-Punk?

--

[foundress0fnothing]

When It Rains—Part 3

This is the final update for When It Rains as part of the ACOTAR Writing Circle. You can find part 1 by @headcanonheadcase here and part 2 by @sunshinebingo here.

Thanks to @azrielshadowssing for organizing this incredible event!

Sorry for the late evening update—I was without wifi in rural Kentucky this weekend 🫠

Please note the rating change--this gets smutty!

Read on AO3!

Gwyn was not too proud to admit that she had fantasized about kissing Azriel for almost as long as she had known him.  

In her mind, their first kiss had gone a lot of different ways: after a heartfelt profession of love in the pouring rain, as a secret liaison out of sight in the kitchen during one of their friend group game nights, and—after going on a Spider-Man movie binge with Nesta and Emerie—with Azriel hanging upside down somehow. Which, in Gwyn’s opinion, would make him more like a bat than a spider, but that was neither here nor there. Probably.

And yet despite all her fantasies, she had not imagined that their first kiss would be in the middle of the night on their annual camping trip, with both of them half-naked and packed into a sleeping bag together. At least there was rain, she supposed.

But as she savored the feeling of his lips on hers, tentative and tender—and as Azriel kissed her back—Gwyn knew that she wouldn’t have had it any other way. 

But she wanted to see his face, wanted to hear him say her name, wanted to confirm that he too felt the magic of this kiss. So she broke away, pulling back to better see him. 

Azriel opened his eyes slowly, as if he were trying to hold on to the moment before it slipped away. Lips slightly parted, he let his eyes drink her in, wandering lower and lower until they stalled where his hoodie hit her upper thigh. She could feel the heat of his gaze searing her skin and wondered for a panicked moment if he could tell she was bare underneath the black fabric. His eyes snapped back up to hers, the air between them suddenly electric, and Gwyn was sure he knew. But he only made a low sound in his throat and said, “Fuck, I love you in my clothes,” before cupping her face, his hand stretching from her temple to her chin, and drawing her in for another kiss. 

While the first kiss had been curious and sweet, this was something much different—hungry and feverish and insisting—and Gwyn found herself wondering, hoping even, that perhaps Azriel had been wanting this as long as she had. 

Breathing raggedly, this time Azriel was the one to pull back, although he kept his hand on her face, chuckling softly under his breath. Gwyn narrowed her eyes at him. “Something funny, Azriel?”

“No, I’m—I’m not laughing at you. Or us. Or this. It’s just that—“ he smiled, the left corner of his mouth twitching upwards. “I think I’ll need a new ‘never have I ever.’”

Gwyn rolled her eyes at that, although she too started smiling. “I don’t think we need to keep playing anymore.”

“No, I think we do,” Azriel said, moving his hand lower so he could capture her chin and better tilt her face up to his. “Everything I say seems to get turned on its head with you. And I’d like that to keep happening.” He kissed her, light and teasing. 

“You sound a little too sure of yourself there, Azriel.”

“Well, Berdara, you haven’t proven me wrong yet.”

She narrowed her eyes at him. “Never have I ever met a more infuriating person than you.”

Azriel hummed and raised his eyebrows. “Is that so?”

“It is,” Gwyn said primly, although she couldn’t help the smile that broke across her face. 

She marveled then that she might get to have this—might get to have Azriel as both her friend and her partner, someone to laugh with and kiss and tease and love, all in one. It seemed almost too good to be real.

And Gwyn knew—she knew—that it was, and that he was feeling this as strongly as she, but she wanted to hear him say it anyway. “This isn’t just a game to you, Azriel, right? Not just trying to beat me at never-have-I-ever?”

His mouth settled into a serious line, although Gwyn could still catch hints of mirth from their banter lighting his eyes. “Does it feel like a game, Gwyneth?”

She smiled. “No?”

“No,” Azriel confirmed. “Not a game. Not with you.”

There was a beat of silence, neither of them quite sure what came next.

Gwyn decided to break the stalemate. “I’ve liked you for a long time, Az.”

She was expecting him to answer in kind, to tell her that he had also been pining after her since they met three years ago, to use their mutual vulnerability to steal another kiss, to let his hands start to wander while he kissed her, to—but Azriel interrupted her fantasies of a grand romantic moment, saying instead, “Mmmm no, I don’t think that’s true.”

Gwyn blinked at him. “You don’t think it’s true…that I’ve liked you for a long time?”

“I don’t. And do you want to know why, Gwyn?”

She raised an eyebrow. 

“It’s because you said you loved me.” He quoted her: “Never have I ever kissed someone whom I have loved for years.” Azriel smiled at her almost smugly, eyes challenging. 

Fuck. Fuck Fuck Fuck. 

Gwyn blinked at him, not trusting herself to say anything yet. Did she love him? Yes. How could she not? Azriel was unfairly hot, and she had eyes after all. He was also the person who always made her laugh. And that was perhaps even more important.

But was she ready to tell him that—that she loved him—today? Right after their first kiss, like this? Fuck no. 

Hoping that her hesitation hadn’t been too noticeable, Gwyn forced a laugh and said, “Well…uh…I…I must have gotten confused about the never have I ever rules,” she babbled. “Can never remember if you say something that’s true or not, you know—the wording is confusing, and—”

But Azriel didn’t buy it. “I thought we weren’t playing games, Berdara.”

She blanched. “I’m not playing games. I just—” she paused, trying to find the right words. “I just didn’t want to tell you so soon. Or like this.”

“But you do? Love me?”

Gwyn nodded and whispered, “I do.”

He smiled widely at that, the expression more open and joyful than anything Gwyn had seen on his face before. “So how would you have told me? If it were up to you?”

“Do you think I’m that insane? Trying to plan out everything?” Gwyn retorted, choosing to ignore the romantic plans for their evening she had been making a few moments earlier. 

Azriel knew her too well. “Don’t you?”

At that, Gwyn decided the only acceptable response was no response at all, and she jokingly turned her head away with all the dignity she could muster. 

But Azriel didn't let the silence linger long, only laughing slightly at her stubbornness before admitting, “I’ve planned it, Gwyn. How I would tell you that I loved you.”

Her breath caught in her throat as she turned back to face him. “You—what?”

“I’ve been planning how I’d tell you that I love you since I first saw you in our campsite three years ago.”

“Your campsite?” The groups had never resolved who was at fault for the site mix-up, and so arguments like this had long been a staple of their gatherings. 

Azriel scowled. “Is that really the detail you want to focus on right now?”

Gwyn kissed him lightly on the nose. “No. Please continue. I want to hear more about how you’ve been chickening out of telling me that you loved me for three years,” she teased. 

“Like you haven’t been doing the exact same thing, Berdara.”

“Is that really the detail you want to focus on right now?” Gwyn parroted his own words back at him, looking at him in challenge.

Azriel rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He paused, and then said, all in a rush, “I’ve thought about telling you that I love you every single day for the last three years. I kept trying to find ways that first camping trip—hell, I even stashed my tent in your car after I chickened out all weekend, just for another chance to see you again and get my head out of my ass. And then kept chickening out every day after that. And then everyone started coupling up and the moment never felt right, you know?—I didn’t want you to feel that I only wanted you because it ‘made sense’ for the group. And now it turns out that I didn’t even get to tell you that I love you first��you beat me to it, Gwyn. You were brave first.” His hand, which had settled somewhere around her shoulders, reached back up to cup her face. 

Gwyn felt a little dizzy. “You…you mixed up the tents on purpose?”

“I’m sorry—that’s what you’re taking from this?” Azriel looked a little affronted.

“No, no—well, not totally.” Gwyn was quick to reassure him, feeling the fever pitch of his heartbeat underneath her hand that still rested on his chest. “I just—I can’t believe that was you.”

“I was a desperate man, Gwyn.”

She laughed and then narrowed her eyes, suspicious. “Are you still? Did you plan all this?”

“Did I plan…all what?”

“I don’t know, tonight—the tent rip, the rain, the shirtlessness.” She reluctantly moved her hand away from him to gesture awkwardly at his body in the close confines of the sleeping bag.

At that, Azriel laughed. “You think I called in a favor with the weather gods to make tonight happen?”

She scowled. “Well, the shirtlessness, at least, has to be intentional.”

“Are you complaining, Gwyneth?” His voice, which had returned to its more normal register after the earlier passion of their kiss suddenly deepend, turned challenging, sensual.

Not to be outdone, Gwyn scooted back as far as she could and looked him up and down, making a big show of ogling the sculpted muscles and intricate tattoos that had been the object of far too many of her daydreams since she first laid eyes on them. God, how she had dreamed of running her hands across his chest, of kissing down it until she reached the line of his pants and the V of his hips and she could finally taste what was underneath.

Caught up in finally indulging herself, Gwyn didn’t notice that her maneuvering had shifted the hoodie up higher on her legs. But Azriel didn’t miss it.

“Well, Berdara,” he said, his voice a little strained, causing Gwyn to snap her eyes back up to his face. Had she offended him with her teasing? But his gaze was once again directed at her legs. “There’s another never have I ever you’ve ruined for me, Berdara.”

“Oh?”

“Oh.” He echoed. “I can no longer claim that I’ve never shared a sleeping bag with someone who decided it would be fine if she just took off her underwear.”

Shit. Gwyn glanced down at herself, and, sure enough, the hoodie had risen just high enough that it was clear she wasn’t wearing anything except the hoodie. Not that he could see much from their angle, but still. Her heartbeat raced, and she felt a furious blush color her face. “I—” Fuck, what does one say in this situation? Gwyn certainly didn’t know. “I wasn’t trying to start anything, I promise! It’s just—they were wet.”

“Oh, were they?” The challenging purr was back in his voice.

“Yes.” She paused, then—“From the rain, you pervert.”

He clicked his tongue. “Disappointing.”

“Uh…” Gwyn was still mortified, still didn’t know what to say. Maybe it would be better if she got up now. It couldn’t still be storming, right? Sleeping in a waterlogged tent couldn’t be worse than this, certainly. She shifted uncomfortably, trying to reach her hands between them and yank the hoodie back down.

But Azriel stopped her hands before she could. “I think you misunderstood me. I’m disappointed they were only wet from the rain, not that they’re not there. That, I don’t mind at all.”

Gwyn felt her breath shudder at his words. Her heart was still racing, face still flushing, but for an entirely different reason than before, heat pooling deliciously in her stomach. She found her voice again: “Is that so, Azriel?” She tried to match his purr, to sound as flirty and coy, but she was a little too breathless to pull it off convincingly.

“Mmmm. It is.” He moved her hands to settle around his neck before allowing his own to graze the sides of her waist, moving in slow, tortuous circles. She arched into his touch, desperate for more of the sensation of his hands on her body. 

Eyes on hers the whole time, Azriel asked, “If I touched you now, Gwyneth, would you still only be wet from the rain?”

Emboldened by the challenge in his gaze and the ache coursing through her body, Gwyn retorted, “Why don’t you find out, Azriel?”

And that was all the invitation he needed, eagerly slotting his mouth back onto hers with a ferocity that made the passion of their earlier kisses feel embarrassingly chaste. He shifted his weight to the side, moving one hand up to cup her breasts under the hoodie while the other skirted lower and lower until it teased her inner thighs.

Gwyn made a soft sound involuntarily in her throat, spreading her legs wider in invitation. 

“‘Eager, Gwyn?” Azriel teased, relinquishing her mouth for just a moment. 

“Yes.” She admitted shamelessly—“I’ve been waiting for this for three years, Azriel.”

At that, he grimaced. “Allow me to apologize for my earlier cowardice then.” He captured her mouth again before gently sliding a finger into her soft, wet heat.

“Oh.” Gwyn couldn’t contain her moan as Azriel almost lazily started pumping his finger in and out of her cunt, teasing her clit simultaneously as he did so. “Azriel…”

“That’s right, Gwyn,” he said, voice gruff. “So wet for me, baby. Just like that.”

He slipped another finger inside, hitting a spot that made her see stars for a moment. Her breathing grew heavy as her head swum and she wanted, she needed—

“So perfect, Gwyn, that’s right.” He interrupted her desperate train of thought.

She moaned at his praise and he continued, “Be my good girl, baby. Come on my fingers.”

And Gwyn shattered.

As she came down from the high of her orgasm, she found Azriel still gently teasing her clit, kissing her collarbone as he gazed at her with a self-satisfied grin.

“Do you accept my apology, Gwyn?” He asked between kisses.

No. She did not. Especially not with that look on his face. Narrowing her eyes at him, she said, “I’m not sure. Is that the best you have to offer?”

Azriel’s eyes flared at her challenge. Holding her gaze steadily, he removed his hand from between her legs and brought it up to her mouth, smearing her lips with the evidence of her pleasure. Gwyn almost moaned from the loss of contact and then from the dominance of his action. 

“Does it taste like an insufficient apology, Gwyneth?”

God, she wanted more. Gwyn could have guessed that Azriel would be like this in bed—commanding and bossy and far too cocky—but she loved every bit of it, craved more of it.

“Tell me what you want, Gwyn,” he continued, tilting his head down to kiss her and taste the remnants of her orgasm. “Tell me how to make it up to you. Tell me how to show you that I love you.”

“Fuck, Azriel, I—” She groaned as he kept kissing her. “More…I need—more. I want you to fuck me. Now.”

The kisses he was peppering across her lips suddenly renewed in ferocity as he ground himself into her and Gwyn felt the evidence of his arousal, long and hard, through his sweatpants. 

Breaking the kiss and sliding back to slip the pants off, Azriel paused in his motions to gaze at her. “Take the hoodie off, Gwyn.”

She did.

“Beautiful.” He breathed out, eyes hungrily tracing the contours of her breasts, of her stomach.

She blushed, then reached up to help him slide his sweatpants off. If he got to look, then so did she.

And oh.

Gwyn knew that Azriel would be big from what she had felt previously. But nothing could have prepared her for the sight of his cock, long and hard and unfairly pretty. Almost unconsciously, she reached her hand out to grasp it, running her thumb through the precum beading at the tip before she started to pump him.

“Christ, Gwyn.” He moaned, breathing ragged. She would have kept going, but he stopped her hand. “Not tonight. Not if you want me to fuck you.”

And she did. “Condom?” 

Azriel flung his arm over to his bag, fishing around in an inner pocket until he pulled out a square of shiny foil. “Came prepared,” he said, slightly sheepishly.

“Yes. Good. Perfect.” She panted, deciding that she would tease him about his preparedness in the morning.

Ripping open the package and rolling the condom down his cock, Azriel lined himself up with her entrance and began to slowly push into her. Gwyn’s eyes rolled back in her head—he was so big and she was so full and she needed—“More, Azriel. Fuck me.”

And he did, snapping his hips forward and fucking into her, hard and fast and perfect, and Gwyn thought this might be heaven. She moaned loudly, not caring if the other tents heard her, caught up in the bliss of this moment.

He swallowed her moan with a kiss. “Perfect, baby, yes. Be loud for me, Gwyn, that’s right. I want to hear you.”

“God, yes, Azriel,” Gwyn breathed out.

“Are you going to come on my cock, baby? Fuck, you take me so well.” She was close, her breathing heavy, hands feverish as she tried to snake them between their bodies so she could play with her clit.

“Let me, Gwyn.” Azriel reached between them and began to do it himself, driving her almost to insanity with the overwhelming sensation of him everywhere. “This is my apology after all. Let me do the work.” 

She could feel her pleasure rapidly climbing, his hands and his words and his cock almost too much to take. “Azriel, I’m going to—”

And she came with a loud moan, Azriel roaring with his own climax a moment later. The two of them lay there, panting, spent, in each other's arms for a moment.

This time, Azriel was the first to speak. “I love you, Gwyn.”

“ I love you, Azriel.” As they cleaned up and Gwyn snuggled into his chest, she thought that this moment might have been worth the ripped tent and soaked sleeping bag after all.

Gwyn and Azriel did not stumble out of the tent until late the next morning. Hand in hand, blinking in the bright morning sun, they were immediately greeted with raucous applause and catcalls from the group. Even Elain, who normally pretended to be a little more reserved than the rest of the party, gave a shockingly loud wolf whistle. 

Gwyn felt her face begin to heat as she realized that everyone—all eight of them—knew exactly what she and Azriel had gotten up to last night. 

She almost ducked back into the tent, but Azriel kept a firm grip on her hand and dragged her over to the fire where coffee and breakfast were keeping warm, only relinquishing his grip to pour two cups of coffee after he was certain she wouldn’t flee.

Nesta and Emerie pounced on her immediately. “Fucking finally,” Nesta said. “Do you know how long we’ve been waiting for this?”

Gwyn rolled her eyes. “I think that’s a little dramatic, Nesta.”

She shook her head emphatically. “Nope. Not even a little. And I expect you to tell me exactly how it was.” To emphasize her point, Nesta held her hands up facing each other and began to spread them wider. “Just tell me when to stop, Gwyn. I need a sense of what we’re working with.”

Gwyn’s eyes widened, but before she could say anything, Cassian interrupted from behind them. “What the actual fuck, Nesta? I rip the tent on purpose for you and spend all day feeling bad for little Gwynnie, and this is how you thank me?”

Gwyn whirled on him. “You ripped my tent on purpose?” 

He at least had the dignity to look a little ashamed. “I’ll buy you a new one? Not that you need it now, apparently.”

She glared at him.

He smiled defensively. “I just thought you needed a push, that’s all.”

“I’m sorry, you thought they needed a push?” Nesta interjected. “It was my idea.”

“No it wasn’t.”

“No, it was my idea,” Feyre said, suddenly joining in the argument. “I mentioned to you months ago that Rhys and I thought Az and Gwyn would make a cute couple.”

“Like hell you did, Feyre—” Nesta began.

As Gwyn fondly watched her friends—her family, really—devolve into an argument, she felt Azriel at her elbow. He handed her a cup of coffee, and she took it, looking up at him. He shrugged at her with a pointed look, much like he always had when the two of them had been the only single ones watching the antics of the couples in the group. She grinned back at him, taking his now free hand and settling it around her shoulders. He kissed the top of her head. 

It had taken three years for them to get here, and Gwyn wouldn’t change a single thing.

[best-curse-word-tournament]

List of all Competitors from Season 1

cunt

Kel

pakala

damn

porra

shat

asshat

putain

shitting dick nipples

D'Arvit

jackanape

sluggard

slattern

kut

kak

perkele

godverdomme

блин

peijakas

what the frick...

うっせぇわ

ken

niquer

smeg

miércoles

coño

FLICK

shitfuck

cabrón

crotte

merde

rat bastard

cac

mundus excrementi

fiddlesticks

scheiße

cazzo

fucknugget

sugar honey iced tea

fuck

bastard

frick frack

God fucking dammit Dave

sonovabitch

pik ansjos

bullfuckery

vaffanculo

culero

gosh diddly darn it

cuntsucker

dickweasel

‘sblood

booty ass

कुत्ती

ordáka

चूतिया

peck

fuckass

bloody

dam

twat

git

bloody Nora

hijueputa

kurwa

bugger

frick

tarnation

applesauce

conchetumadre

*dolphin noises*

đụ má

хуй

блять

bitch

kacke verdammte

Hell’s bells

скоммуниздить

fuckshit

fuckwit

пиздец

caralho

crapbaskets

quiznak

shite

peeved

wazzock

dath apeth

slag

pillock

kriff

schist

godverdeklotekleretyfuskutzooi

graftak

pendejo

mothertrucker

jebać

shazbat

vittu

cocksucker

bomboclaat

paska

crikey

nonce

tering

בן זונה

fugg

sard

fucker

assfucker

shit

fucking Hell

zounds

heck

साला

what the kentucky fried fuck

I’m not here to fuck spiders

kleb

YouTube

bejabbers

jobbernowl

dunderwhelp

grumbletonian

sumph

ninnyhammer

dodipoll

sweet baby Jesus

weón

feckin’

lickspittle

hog grubber

see you next Tuesday

dicknips

herranjumala

mothersucking goose

zounderkite

scheibenwischer

ostie de criss de tabarnak

frell

jegus

nerfherder

dipshit

dickhead

ding dang

helvete

спиздить

наебать

fishsticks

binch

donkey

fuckwad

coat hanger

What! The! [Fifty Percent Off]!?

[alliswyattonthewesternfront]

our next gig isn't until the end of July, but i'm likely gonna shit out a design for a trip to Kentucky next month. i want to test out making another character who is wingless (fairy wings are a nightmare for me personally) but still eye-catching. also, having 2 characters would mean not having to frantically spray down my costume with vodka and dry it by hand after a rain day so that i can wear it without gagging out patrons.

i'm making a tunic version of my click-clack skirt and testing it out with some linen pants i purchased. if i like the silhouette, i'll buy another pair and embroider/distress them so it fits the aesthetic. i try and buy as little as possible, but i think if i sufficiently make it my own, it should work. i'm designing a cranberry elf: specifically, the siberian swamp cranberry. i'm toying with the name Asterid since that's the clade for that particular variant. gonna use some of my red japanese wind chime bells to make cranberry jewelry, embellish some jester shoes i bought off a friend, and mix a bunch of spider charms in with my wooden beads in the skirt. and i think i'll braid a cranberry strand into my rat tail.

the tricky part will be body language. i make Oro super delicate and high femme, kind of a "i'm in denial about being an orc, i'm one of the fairies tee hee" type of deal. kids love it. i'd want this character to have much more dramatic body language and a brusque way of speaking. think clockwork toy. anyway, doing a dry run as a patron at a neighboring faire takes the pressure off. will post costuming progress pics as i go along, per usual

[rpking99]

Lesbian/Gay Muses

This list is for my muses who only enjoy one gender as their sexual partner

COMICS- DC

Batwoman/Kate Kane

Kate Kane, Batwoman. Kicked out of the military because she was a lesbian. Bruce Wayne's badass cousin on his mothera side.

COMICS- MARVEL

Agony Symbiote

One of Venom's many spawn. With acidic saliva, she is more quiet and calm than her sister Scream. But also much more sadistic if the mood fits her

Ultimate Spider-Woman/Jessica Drew (Earth 1610)

A female clone of the Ultimate Universe Peter Parker. The same powers plus the ability to produce webbing from her fingers.

CARTOONS- HAZBIN HOTEL

Vaggie

Vaggie is a canonical lesbian character. Although I might make exceptions for futa's.

Angel Dust

Angel Dust is definatly a muse I would refer to as one of my femboy muses. He is also gay, so only male/other femboys with him. Although I might make exceptions for Futa's

TOKUSATSU- ZENKAIGER

ZenkaiMagine/Magine

TOKUSATSU- KAMEN RIDER REVICE

Kamen Rider Jeanne/Sakura Igarashi

Kamen Rider Aguilera/Hana Natsuki

V-TUBERS

Kiara Takanashi

Kiara is a phoenix, and the head of KFP. Kentucky Fried Phoenix. Immortal, able to be revived from death as the famous fire bird can, she works hard and ensured her workers do the same. An amazing dancer, cheerful and supportive. She will hug you or punch you without hesitation, if you are friend of foe of course.

Nerissa 'Rissa' Ravencroft

Nerissa is a demon of sound. Of song. The bird girl's love empowering her voice that makes her songs potent, powerful. Enchanting. Mind and soul. And so she was sealed away. Girl crazy, she is very casual and cheerful. Playful, sensual and seductive.

Elizabeth Rose BloodFlame

Elizabeth, or Liz for short, is the leader of Justice. The Scarlet Queen, Lady Bloodflame is in charge of monitoring and capturing Narissa Ravencroft... And she is very dutiful of that job.... This marvelous singer, this powerful warrior, song and battle are all the same to her. Letting it beautiful songs as she says her foes. Vey traditional high class monarch attitude, but also super sweet and cheerful. Able to switch between "Kneel before your monarch, knave!" and "Later Luv, have a bloody good time!" at the drop of a hat. While serious and mission minded, she is also easily flustered and rather peaceful. Also, British.

OC

Sam

Sam is 22. A lesbian or futa only character. A snarky British girl who can be full lady or futa. A tomboy mostly with a flare for the dramatic She tends to shift between punk, goth and biker girl styles with her outfits

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

~Classic incorrect quotes to nourish your soul~

==========================================

Florida, grinning: I have a knife!

Gov: Put it down, Florida.

Florida: Make me! *sprints away*

~~~

Louisiana: You know, when I first met you I thought you were a real b*tch.

Alabama: What changed your mind?

Louisiana: Oh, I never changed my mind, you're still a b*tch. Why do you ask?

~~~

S.C.: Hey New York, do you have any hobbies?

New York: Swimming..

S.C.: Really? That’s cool. I never expected you to-

New York: In a pool of self hatred and regret :)

S.C.: Wtf-

~~~

Georgia: Your smile looks forced.

Maryland: That’s because it is.

~~~

S.C.: *makes Louisiana a cup of tea but puts salt in it*

Louisiana: *sips tea*

S.C.:

Louisiana: *finishes tea*

S.C.: Didn't it taste bad?

Louisiana: Yeah, but I didn't want to hurt your feelings so I drank it all.

S.C., tearing up: Oh, okay.

~~~

Louisiana: Massachusetts... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?

Massachusetts: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.

Louisiana:

Louisiana: I wrote sanitize, Massachusetts.

~~~

Gov: I just heard New York call the dog a “f*cking liar” because he barked like someone was at the door and no one was there.

~~~

Texas: Y'know, I once knew a man who said to me: “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.” He also had a pair of sideburns that would cause even Jude Law’s face to weep in forfeit. You put those lemons in a sack and beat your enemies with ‘em! And maybe if you beat ‘em hard enough the bag will split open and lemon juice will spray into their eyes, causing intense burning pains as you crush them into a citrus-y pulp!

Kentucky: Wait, wait, wait, wait. Their heads or the lemons?

Texas: Whatever caves first!

Kentucky: None of the parenting books I've read have prepared me for this sh*t....

~~~

New York: Given the circumstances, I will let you hug me for four to five seconds.

Maryland: Forty five seconds?!?

New York: No! I said four TO five seconds.

Maryland, hugging New York: Too late.

~~~

New York: Are you trying to seduce me?

California: Why, are you seducible?

~~~

New York: Hey guys, I found a spider. Cool little lad. Thanks for eating the mosquitos.

New York: Oh no, where did it go?

Connecticut: NEW YORK WHAT THE F*CK?!

~~~

Alaska: I want to be with you for the rest of my life.

Texas: Damn, that sounds like a marriage proposal.

Alaska, getting down on one knee: That's 'cause it is.

Texas: (⁠｡•/⁠/w/⁠/•｡⁠)

~~~

[todaysbug]

December 16th, 2023

Six-spotted Tiger Beetle (Cicindela sexguttata)

Distribution: Found in the northeastern USA and southern Canada; north to Ontario, west to Minnesota and as far south as Kentucky.

Habitat: Mainly found in deciduous forests, but also in sunny areas like dirt paths, sidewalks and roads, fields, grassy areas and on decaying logs (but rarely far from wooded areas).

Diet: Adults and larvae are both carnivorous, feeding on insects and other invertebrates, such as caterpillars, ants and spiders.

Description: Despite being called the six-spotted tiger beetle, the spots on thus tiger's elytra may vary between zero to eight spots. They also have remarkably long legs, allowing them to run at high speeds—they're so fast, in fact, that their eyes have trouble processing fast enough to keep up, meaning they can't run more than short spurts without being blinded. As expected by their speed, adults are active predators—the grub-like larvae, however, are ambush predators, burrowing into patches of sandy substrate and lunging out at their prey when it comes near. In order to avoid being dragged out of their burrow, larvae also have hooks on their abdomen, allowing them to hang onto the substrate.

These beetles are rather long-lived, usually living around three or four years. In order to survive the cold winters, adults overwinter in the same burrows they used as larvae. They're also mostly harmless—though the adult has large, threatening mandibles and is an aggressive predator, it will not bite unless handled.

(Images by TheAlphaWolf and Mathew L. Brust)

[onenicebugperday]

@patrickunderaleaf submitted: Baffled and so very confused about who this man is. He has some round orblike palps in particular and has those hairy bristles on his legs, i found him on the wall of my bathroom in kentucky, hes very polite

Looks like a very cute garden ghost spider :)

[2-timesaweek]

Wolf spiders in Kentucky: Are their bites dangerous? | Lexington Herald Leader

https://www.kentucky.com/news/state/kentucky/article290169454.html