#Just two sad people who never commit and never act on anything | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

miumura · 5 months ago

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IN ANOTHER LIFE, YOU’D BE THE ONE.

assigning enhypen sad tropes / endings

PAIRING enhypen x gn!reader GENRE angst, some fluff? WARNINGS some r not portrayed in a good light (bc of the trope ideas) WORD COUNT varies from 0.3-0.7K+ per

DISCLAIMER these are just random tropes that i think suits them, however, this is not a true depiction of how enhypen truly acts in real life. this is simply just fictional.

‘ 💬 ’ hanniluvi cb? HAHA sorry for disappearing on you guys, but i just finished finals & school is ending soon !!! so yk what that means 😊! slowly making my way back 2 writing 🫡 this was def made randomly and somehow i was committed to it so here you guys go!!

HEESEUNG — HE FAILED THE SECOND TIME.

i don’t really have an explanation to this, i just think he suits this kind of trope? like he truly loves you to the point where he’s willing to give another shot into the relationship. but when trying again, he realizes the problem but was too late to fix it once more.

You wouldn’t have expected either, but the buzz coming from your phone would be a text message from Heeseung. Shock and adrenaline rushed within your body as he was the first to break the “no contact” rule after your break up.

Without a second thought, you found yourself propped up against your bed frame, texting him instead of sleeping. It was going well, until the text messages started becoming more flirtatious.

Even so, it felt different. It felt like you two were finally ready to try again. When he arrived at your doorstep with flowers and a sign asking, "CAN I BE YOUR BOYFRIEND?", you found no reason to decline.

Texts? He sent you thoughtful good morning and good night messages regularly.

Dates? He always paid attention to your preferences, leading to more spontaneous dates than anticipated.

Gifts? He surprised you with "just because" gifts, often accompanied by adorable notes.

Perhaps it seemed too perfect, but you were too in love to see any warning signs. His initial initiative in reaching out first felt like destiny. However, those blissful three to four months soon dissolved into nothing.

Texts? His responses come much later, and those sweet good morning and good night messages? Few and far between.

Dates? You're the one initiating them, and they lack the genuine spark they once had.

Gifts? It's only you who's putting in the effort, mirroring the gestures he used to make.

You've noticed he's slipping back into old patterns. Heeseung is consumed by his own schedule, neglecting those around him. Attempts to communicate often circle back to his work, leaving no room to discuss your relationship. He's too drained to prioritize you.

Perhaps you shouldn't have expected more or less, considering you already gave him another chance before.

You tried waiting, but with each passing day, you only disappointed yourself further.

So you gradually stopped texting, stopped putting in effort, stopped caring. And what came of it? Nothing.

Nothing until he randomly resurfaced with texts again.

People never change.

This time, without the previous excitement and nerves, you found yourself indifferent to even bother replying. Maybe your silence would speak volumes, considering he's accustomed to the silence he often gives you.

Maybe, you shouldn't have replied in the first place.

JAY — YOU FELL OUT OF LOVE, HE LOVED TOO HARD.

honestly, i see jay as a person who would absolutely do everything and anything for anyone. like this man would have no problem doing anything if it was meant to help anyone he loved. he just gives off the energy / whole idea of “so much love to give, gets not much in return.”

Since you started dating Jay, this guy has been nothing short of perfect to you. He constantly surprises you with flowers, insists on carrying everything for you, and showers you with compliments at every opportunity.

On the surface, it all seemed too good to be true. Despite having what many would consider the "perfect" boyfriend, you found yourself drifting away. Feelings slowly waned, and you began to distance yourself from the person who loved you the most.

Initially, you might not have noticed, but he did. As you began to give him less attention, show less reaction to his gestures, and the love in your eyes faded upon seeing him, he observed it all.

He witnessed you transform into someone unrecognizable. He recognized the signs of change, and perhaps he should have let go then. Yet, there remained a part of him that was reluctant to give up, still holding onto hope and the desire to keep trying.

Despite his earnest efforts to salvage the relationship, he couldn't escape the inevitable "Let’s break up" conversation. He hadn't realized how much his attempts to reignite your love were taking a toll on him until you made the decision to end things.

For months, he had maintained a facade of "everything will be okay," but now, faced with the reality of losing you, he began to crumble. He had invested so much time and energy into becoming a better person for someone he loved, only to realize that he was sacrificing himself in the process.

He couldn't blame you; he never would. He understood that you were falling out of love, and perhaps he should have let go sooner. But he couldn't shake the feelings he still harbored for you, even as they led to nothing but heartache.

Getting over you won't be as simple as he had hoped. He'll likely continue to blame himself, wondering what he could have done differently to be a better boyfriend for you.

But deep down, you know he did nothing wrong. He was a wonderful partner; it's just that you had fallen out of love, and sometimes, that's nobody's fault.

JAKE — RIGHT PERSON, WRONG TIME.

DUDEEEEE, you can’t tell me jake gives off the vibes of a person you’d always think about. no matter how much you try to forget him, you visually can’t get him out of your head. like you truly like this guy, but because of the time/fate, it lead you guys onto separate paths. this trope sounds cliche, but it’s the best way i can word it.

Jake embodied everything you sought in a partner. From his looks to his humor, and especially his personality, he checked all the boxes. Spending time with him felt like a whirlwind; the hours flew by when it was just the two of you.

Ever since he moved in next door, you found yourself drawn to him, intrigued by his every move. What began as subtle glances evolved into friendly greetings and eventually daily hangouts.

You never knew you could be this over the heels with someone until you met him. You found yourself looking forward to his daily texts and him sending silly videos that reminded him of you. You found yourself making silly trinkets and dropping them off in his mailbox. You found yourself with a pink envelope in your hand, walking to the park to give to him.

And as always, you saw that smile that always managed to brighten up your day. Sitting next to him on the swings, as you expected to be faced with another few hours of random talk with him, you’d be suddenly hit with the news of him having to move.

You didn't want to believe it.

You hoped he was joking, but instead, you were met with a disappointed look on his face. He seemed almost ashamed that this was happening, even though you knew it wasn't his fault.

You could imagine how badly he felt, so you kept your emotions in check and simply told him you would miss him. That night, you went home with tears staining the pink envelope you had intended to give him—a letter of your confession.

You had planned to give it to him that day, but instead, you saved it for his last day.

"Here," you said, pressing your lips into a thin line as you handed him the envelope.

"What is this?" he asked, curiosity piqued.

"A letter—but don't read it now!"

"Why not? You're tempting me," Jake replied, raising an eyebrow as he held the envelope with care.

"Well, don't listen to your temptations because—hey!" Before you could finish, he had already opened it, revealing its contents.

"This is embarrassing," you mumbled into your hands, feeling the heat rise to your face. Peeking through your fingers, you saw his eyes getting watery as he chuckled at parts of your letter.

When he finished reading, Jake looked at you and extended his arms. You immediately fell into his embrace, feeling his warmth surround you. Placing a hand on the back of your head, he whispered into your ear, "I'm sorry."

"For what?" your voice cracked, fearing that your confession would lead to nothing.

"I'm sorry this had to be this way," he said, clearing his throat and fighting back tears stirred by your emotional letter. "If it wasn't obvious enough, I like you too."

You felt a mix of relief and sadness. Despite your mutual feelings, fate was pulling you in different directions.

Before you could say another word, his family was already calling him to leave. Jake gave you one last squeeze and a look filled with fondness.

"I'll try to contact you often, okay, YN?"

"Okay," you replied.

As he waved goodbye with red eyes and that beautiful smile you loved, you saw him for the last time in person, feeling the weight of the moment settle in your heart.

SUNGHOON — JUST “FAKE DATING”.

do you see the vision that i’m visioning. like i don’t know, it just works out?? like i can see you two starting to fake date, it leads to something more (at least that’s what you think), and that all disappears, repeating once more. like it seems like he means it, but at the same time, his actions seem to prove otherwise. it’s like a constant cycle that you don’t want to or know how to get out of.

"I'm telling you, I don't think you should be doing this," your friend insisted, both online and in person. "Hanging with Sunghoon is only going to hurt you."

You never anticipated how your own choices might backfire. As a good friend, you just wanted to help Park Sunghoon make someone jealous. After all, with his pleading tone, how could you possibly say no?

If only you just believe his rule, "Don't fall in love with each other," this should be easy. You just needed to play the role—that’s all you had to do.

So, it started off slowly.

You two were together all the time, which was normal for you both. But whenever his ex came around, you could feel him inching closer, invading your personal space. It wasn’t much, but it felt rather intimate...though that was the plan.

Then it escalated. Sunghoon didn’t just act like a boyfriend in person and at school; he began behaving the same way outside of school and over text.

You spent more time together, going to places, laughing as you took pictures. He started showing up at your house unannounced, and the two of you would stay up late, binge-watching your favorite shows and having those nightly talks.

He even introduced you to his friends. Would someone go to such lengths for a fake relationship?

It just didn’t feel like pretending. You felt something there, something that couldn’t be easily explained.

You tried to brush it aside, but your feelings for him only grew. You were definitely falling for his stupid, swooning charms.

You hoped he was falling for you too.

But that sliver of hope crashed down when you saw him with the very person he had wanted to chase after.

They were smiling and holding hands. He looked so...happy.

After he gave them a final hug, he turned and met your gaze, your eyes slightly glistening.

"Thank you, YN," he said, with that stupid grin on his face—the one you had fallen for. Seeing it now only made your stomach twist painfully.

“Thank you? That’s….that’s it?”

“I’m sorry?” Sunghoon gave you a confused look. “Did you expect something more?”

“I would’ve loved an explanation.”

“What?”

You pressed your lips together, but your emotions were overflowing.

“Why would you treat me like that? I mean, why would you treat me so nicely? Why would you try so hard that it made me feel like we could’ve had something…real?”

“YN…”

"Just why, Sunghoon? If you knew this was only going to be a fake relationship, why did you create something special only for it to be discarded?"

"I'm sorry, YN. I never intended my gestures to be misleading, so I never purposefully planned that. I did enjoy our time together, but I have to end whatever we had because I now have the person I will always want."

Right.

No matter how hard you try, you can't change Sunghoon's mind.

You aren’t the person he wants.

After all, that was the whole point of his plan.

Don’t fall in love with each other.

SUNOO — YOU TWO DRIFTED APART.

i feel like with sunoo, since he has such an outgoing and bubbly demeanor, it allows him to easily connect with others. so with that idea in mind, why not because of his personality and him constantly being involved in new crowds, it causes him to have no time for you. without realizing it at first, he soon forgets about his priority: you.

You can't help but feel a whirlwind of emotions: confused, overwhelmed, sad.

Sunoo is a great guy, and you know that. But his bubbly personality seems to be interfering with your relationship.

At first, you were completely fine with it. He helped you meet new people, pushed you out of your comfort zone, and, most importantly, you saw him extremely happy. That’s all you really wanted.

But lately, you've noticed that he’s been paying less attention to you. Even when it's just the two of you, he often ends up calling someone or suddenly engaging in conversations with people around you.

You always had to make the plans, and his reactions seemed less genuine compared to when he was with others. Would it be wrong to think that you don’t matter to him anymore?

You always had to initiate conversations. Always.

Just like every other day, you were on the phone with Sunoo, the silence filling the room. No one was talking, and you could probably assume he was messaging someone else while on the phone with you.

Clearing your throat, you finally spoke. “Sunoo?” You didn’t know why you were nervous; he was your boyfriend, after all.

“Yes?”

“Um…” Your throat felt like it was closing up on you. You never wanted to seem pushy or insecure because of his behavior—you just wanted to feel special again, like you did at the beginning of the relationship. It should be easy to tell someone like him, right?

“Just tell me, YN.”

“Listen…” You hesitated before continuing. “Do you even… love me anymore?”

“Seriously? What kind of question is that? Of course I love you. Do I not show you that?”

“Well… no.” You bit your lip, hoping to get the closure you needed.

“I didn’t know you felt that way. I hope you know that you’re my—oh, YN. I’m sorry, I really have to go. I promised to hang out with Jungwon today. I’ll call you back, okay? Love you.”

You heard the other line beep, leaving you feeling empty. Removing the phone from your ear and dropping it in your lap, you looked at the calendar next to you. Today's date had a large red circle with little hearts doodled around the event “OUR ANNIVERSARY.”

He was hanging out with Jungwon instead of you. He forgot it. You stared at the hearts, feeling a knot form in your stomach. This day had meant so much to you, and now it felt like just another ordinary, lonely day.

His "I love you"s always reassured you—but now? They did nothing but make you feel worse.

He really doesn’t realize how much he’s hurting you, does he?

JUNGWON — THE CLASSIC SECOND LEAD.

okay okay, hear me out. i feel like jungwon suits the idea of a person liking someone, but too afraid to actually make a move. like he would want to keep people he like closely, but he would never do anything that seemed like it would lead to a fallout or anything more. so because of this, it leads to him watching you love someone else on the sidelines.

Jungwon has always been a nervous guy, and being in love only amplified his anxiety.

After spending so much time getting to know you, he realized he was falling—deeply. And he hated how it made him feel.

He hated how he would stutter when trying to make eye contact with you.

He hated how he took extra time to fix his hair.

He hated how he felt like a nervous wreck every time he initiated a hangout outside of school and work, praying you’d have the time.

But all those things he hated would soon fade away when he was with you. He began to appreciate himself for making the effort—it felt worth it.

Any moment with you felt special to him—enough for him to lay in bed and think about it all night.

He loved how you made him feel seen and understood, something he had not felt with anyone else.

If he were to date someone, he would want it to be you.

"Isn't he so dreamy?"

Hearing those words crushed his hopes of ever making you his.

He found himself sitting across from you, listening to you talk about this new guy, feeling a knot form in his stomach.

"Are you listening, Won?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, sorry. What happened again?" He nervously chuckled, clearly not wanting to hear what was going to come out of your mouth.

"We're going on a date tomorrow!"

His heart was about to burst.

Deep down, he wished he could tell you how he truly felt, how much he cared about you, but it seemed like there would be no point.

Every word felt like a stab, yet he forced a smile. "I am so happy for you, YN."

And there was that smile—the very smile he hoped to see whenever you talked about him. But instead, that beautiful smile was for somebody else.

As you continued excitedly talking about your upcoming date, Jungwon couldn't help but feel a pang of sadness, knowing that he would always be just a friend, never the one you longed for.

Jungwon found another thing he hates about being in love.

He hates how loving someone can ultimately hurt you too.

NIKI — “TOO HARD TO LOVE”.

i can somehow see niki being apart of a trope where there is a lack of communication. like i think it would be hard to express himself properly, leading him to become closed off. like he would do tests to see how much you actually cared for him, leading to his own unsatisfaction. and yet, he still wouldn’t communicate it properly, leading to the downfall of your relationship with him.

"It doesn't seem like you care," Niki let slip out over the phone, his words not quite what he had intended to say to you.

"What do you mean?" you responded, clearly frustrated. "How can you say I don't care?"

"You haven't reached out to me."

"And what about you?"

"What?" Niki was taken aback by your abruptness.

"You never tell me anything. How am I supposed to know that you even want to be around me when all you've done is just push me away?"

The silence hung heavy between you, the weight of unspoken emotions palpable even through the phone line. Niki's mind raced, grappling with the sudden confrontation. He hadn't anticipated this turn in their conversation, nor had he realized the extent of his own actions until now.

Niki had never experienced this level of comfort and connection with anyone before.

He hadn't anticipated falling in love again—until he met you.

You possessed all the qualities he had been searching for, and being with you felt incredibly natural. So, it came as a surprise when he found himself in a relationship with you; it all seemed almost too perfect to be true.

Without even realizing, Niki was starting to become rather distant. He never intended to, but he was afraid of becoming a burden to you. The thought of investing so much time and energy into someone who might eventually leave scared him.

"I... I didn't realize," Niki stammered, his voice betraying a mix of confusion and guilt. "I didn't mean to push you away. I just... I've been dealing with some stuff lately, and I guess I haven't been handling it well."

"Then you could've told me, but you didn't. You only talked to me because I was always the one reaching out first," you finally said, your voice heavy with hurt. "So why?"

Niki felt a lump form in his throat, the weight of your words sinking in. He struggled to find the right words, the right explanation, but nothing seemed adequate.

"I don't know," he admitted softly. "Maybe I was scared."

"Scared of what?" you pressed gently.

"Just... just forget it," Niki muttered, frustration creeping into his voice. “I’m sorry.”

"Niki, I need to know that you're willing to put in the effort, to be open with me. This relationship can't work if it's one-sided."

"I just don't want to lose you," he confessed, his voice breaking slightly.

"I don't know if I can believe that."

"What?" Niki's voice was filled with surprise and hurt.

"I can't tell if you're honest with me. You've done this more than once, Niki."

"But it's true!" His voice raised higher, clearly panicked by how the situation had escalated.

"You say that, but actions speak louder than words," you replied, trying to stay calm despite the turmoil inside. "If you really don't want to lose me, you need to show it, not just say it."

Niki should've taken that as a sign to finally show what he'd been holding back. He should've explained why he had such a hard time expressing his feelings, and proved to you that you were someone he truly wanted.

But he didn't. He found himself holding back once again, repeating the very behavior you truly hated.

"Okay," he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

"That's... that's it?" You scoffed in disbelief. "Really?"

Niki felt a surge of panic and regret. He knew he was failing you again, but the words just wouldn't come. "I don't know what else to say," he admitted, feeling helpless.

"You could start by being honest," you replied, frustration evident. "Why is it so hard for you to open up? Why do you keep pushing me away?"

Niki hesitated, the fear of vulnerability clawing at him. "It's not that simple," he said finally. "I've never been good at this. I've always been afraid of getting too close, of being hurt again. But that's no excuse. I know I need to change."

"Then show me," you insisted. "Show me that you mean it. I need to see that you care enough to try."

Your silence was heavy, filled with both skepticism and a flicker of hope. "Call me when you're finally ready for this. I think we both need a break to think things over clearly, okay?"

Niki should have seen this coming. But instead of running away from the problem like he used to, he accepted it. "Okay."

You hung up the phone, leaving Niki alone with his thoughts. Determined, he knew he had to win you back and prove he could be different, better than he had been throughout the entire relationship.

💬 : if it doesn’t seem obvious enough, i’m trying to get back into writing longer fics 🤫

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jymwahuwu · 2 months ago

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I keep imagining Jing Yuan and Feixiao fighting over a reader who is trying to play coy, be a little flirty to both without ever committing, getting a rise out of teasing them while never giving them what they really want. I get flustered just imagining the different ways one of them might snap afbshqgvskq

-Honkai-Star-Thirst

Love this, you always provide great thirsty ideas. I'm going to be sandwiched between two generals😽💦💖💖💖

Oh, you are playing with fire, you know? Dare to play with the emotions of the two Xianzhou generals? Pretending to be shy and acting inexperienced in front of them?

cw: yandere, non-con, punishment, forced orgasm, forced kiss

You have a knack for time management - juggling two generals with appointments on the same day. The date with Jing Yuan was in a cat cafe. Together you pet the cute and charming cat and chat happily. Sometimes you two go to an adoption organization and volunteer together. Jing Yuan is really romantic at heart. You two have been dating for half a month… so holding hands is normal, right? He moved closer to you, wanting to interlock with your fingers. You ducked and said you had a sad past (you didn't). You're afraid of contact with men (you're not). You expressed your admiration for him at the same time, your eyes filled with admiration like stars. "If it were you…" You only said the first half of the sentence and stopped without making any promises.

In the afternoon, you have a date with Feixiao. You put on beautiful accessories and changed into another set of clothes. It was a picnic date! Before setting off, you baked some small cakes, brought a box of fruit, and brought sandwiches in a picnic basket. Arriving early is the point (pretend to be considerate and cute). You took the basket and sat on the grass obediently waiting for Feixiao to arrive. So when the general arrived, he saw you placing your legs on the red polka dot patterned picnic mat, waiting for her obediently… It was really heartwarming. She actually wanted to propose to you…but you didn't even agree to confirm the relationship with her. Feixiao shares food with you and shares her new knowledge. You smiled and nodded, occasionally giving some responses. When she wants to kiss you on the cheek, you avoid her and say the seagulls over there are cute.

You wanted to laugh out loud just thinking about how you could tease the feelings of the two Xianzhou generals. They're just too simple…in a romantic relationship, aren't they? It was really a first for them. You almost couldn't help but laugh when Jing Yuan told you that this was his first date in over seven hundred years. But how could it be your first time?

Your plan worked…right?

Ah, but your endless teasing may eventually lead to some emotional outbursts… The one who snaps first may be Jing Yuan. He may look like an angry kitten after you have avoided his advances countless times. And picks you up and kisses you, overstimulating you with his fingers. But none of this is dangerous…

Until the two generals exchanged photos of their "lovers" (as they called themselves, you didn't promise) during a casual chat. They looked at the photo on the screen, which showed the smiling face of the same person. It only took them a few minutes to figure it out - love blinds people, even generals. How dare you tease their love?

There's not even a need to wait, since you've delayed them for so long, punishment is necessary. That night, you agreed to a date with one of them, but rejected the other. With a smug smile, you pushed open the door of the general's mansion.

…Only to find the two of them standing in the living room, chatting leisurely.

A chill ran down your spine, and your lips trembled, but your reason told you that maybe they hadn't noticed yet. You just need better acting skills…

They had no intention of being so gentle with you. The world was spinning, and without even saying anything, you were pushed onto the sheets and your newly bought shorts and underwear were ripped off. The sound of fabric being torn was terrifying. A soft whimper escaped your throat. Fear. "Please- I can explain!! I'm not-" "Shh, don't be afraid." Jing Yuan kissed your lips, and Feixiao's hands grabbed your cheeks, as if she thought about whether to use force. Your cheeks don’t hurt from the tug. "You said it was your first time? Prove it."

A few hours later, you were lying on the bed with your butt lifted up helplessly, tightly closed, but the big, calloused hands parted your buttocks and played with the moist slit inside. That cock is pushed inside you again. Meanly fiddle with the core inside. Your lips were pried open, her tongue was entangled with yours, and her hot breath was sprayed on your face. Her fingers are circling and caressing your areola, occasionally pinching. "Hmm…" The pitiful moans filled your chest, and there was no way to avoid them.

After you're exhausted, they stop. Your screaming apology was caught on tape. The two generals sighed and looked at each other. Why did they suffer from such a heartless person like you?

But, there is no way, they just love you, and the punishment is over. Jing Yuan wiped the bodily fluids off your body, and Feixiao patted your buttocks. One of them is on your left and one on your right. They carefully put their hands on your waist and head and fell asleep with you.

#yandere honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader #honkai star rail x you #jing yuan x reader #feixiao x reader #yandere jing yuan x reader #yandere feixiao x reader

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haine-kleine · 4 months ago

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i thought the ending couldn't be more disappointing and then this japanese tweet proved me wrong

because all of this is true. Ochako and Izuku will never forget Toga and Tenko and half of their epilogue was about this, however messily done. Ochako dedicated herself to creating better conditions for people like Toga, because she saw how badly Toga was suffering and despite failing to save her and give her a brighter future, she committed to building that future on her own, selflessly gifting it to others. Izuku had failed to save Tenko despite wanting to, and this weights on his conscience eight years later, and will continue to haunt him in the form of Shigaraki's ghost watching him, not letting him forget himself in the happy ending of joining his hero classmates and achieving his dream.

it's still messy and unfaithful as fuck, but at least these two endings still show that the consequences were there. the unfair deaths of the villains weren't simply swept under the rug and forgotten after a few sad talks about them.

and the thing these two cases share in common? Ochako and Izuku really didn't owe it to Toga and Shigaraki to save them. they didn't. they were hero kids thrown in the middle of the war these very villains waged on them. they both were younger than their respective villains, they both were hurt by these villains, they had no prior history with them, and having shared a few conversations was enough to make them emphasize with and humanize the villains. nothing that happened to Himiko and Tenko was inflicted on them by Ochako and Izuku, and yet just seeing that, hearing about that was enough to ignite sympathy in their hearts. because, you know, they are heroes. they are there to save people from suffering. and even when those people are the ones actively hurting them and their friends, they are mature enough to set that aside and attempt to save their human lives.

enter the star of the show, the only character in this story who despite having committed truly villainous acts, is allowed to go consequences free without a single care in the world. Enji. the person who had single-handedly fucked Touya up to the point his mental state was too messed up even for AFO to deal with. he had given life to this baby, and he was constantly made aware of how badly his attitude is affecting this child by Rei. and he couldn't be bothered to do anything for him, not even to look at him. the fire on Sekoto was 100% Enji's fault, not only because he couldn't be bothered to come visit his son on his day off when Touya had asked him to, but also because the number two hero on his day off was too slow to come to the forest near his house to save Touya from the fire or from All for One. this makes Touya being kept under AFO's care for the following 3 years Enji's responsibility, as he was the only one who could have saved Touya from AFO. even after Touya wakes up from his coma and immediately runs to his house as fast as he can, it's Enji's behaviour alone that makes him decide against making his presence known to the family for the following 7 years. this excuse of a father can't even mourn the death of a son he explicitly blames himself for in such way that won't make his entire existence feel meaningless to him.

and after Touya reveals himself to Enji personally as Dabi? he proves that he still hasn't changed at all and utterly fails to do anything about the situation while Shouto has to repeatedly remind him of it. not only was he procrastinating, the narrative was coddling him the entire time, with the support of other heroes and sidekicks, who despite being shown the truth about Enji, choose to ignore it. even the family he has been abusing for years, the family who was mourning Touya together, joins their efforts to support Enji.

Touya's only desires were to be seen and to be heard. both went unanswered, as after showing the world the unfiltered truth of the misery his father had caused to him, the world covered their earths and turned away. after showing himself to his family, they keep looking at Enji, not at him.

even at the very end, the end of the family's hell is more about Enji than about any other character. he is the only one allowed to talk about his feelings in depth, while the rest of them are reduced to barebone imitations of their previously established characters used as props for supporting Enji's character resolution (with the exception of Touya, who is physically unable to speak for longer than 5 minutes a day anymore. wow). even Natsuo cutting off Enji is less about the latter being a horrible excuse of a father and more about Enji's great stoicism accepting everything the family throws at him with a heroic face. Rei's character no longer makes sense because exactly a month ago her mental state and the trauma inflicted on her by this very man didn't allow her to face him at all. and now she is suddenly okay with becoming his caretaker? why is she taking her responsibility for Touya and not talking about Enji's responsibility at all? this was a man who had abused her so badly she had a psychotic episode. you don't just shrug off things like this. you don't sit in a psychiatric ward for ten years after that, waiting to be let out and jump on the first chance of making yourself useful for your abuser. you don't set aside the relationships with the children he had hurt and he had made you hurt to devote yourself fully to your damn abuser. someone take this poor woman out of this Stockholm syndrome relationship.

at this point Touya not being allowed to die is the worst offence, because the survival wasn't granted to him to heal. it was given to him for the singular purpose of making Endeavor look slightly less bad. Enji never even talks about failing to save Touya (and neither is Shouto allowed to). if you wanted to save him, then him being stuck immobile and isolated from the world with only months left to live is not 'the time Shouto gave us with him' it's a failure. he's not your damn pet, why is the narrative making him into one?

Touya had wanted to die. Shouto points this out, Touya himself talks about it. Enji was the one who didn't want him to die. he also didn't want to die himself. somehow, his desire is the only one that is fulfilled, while even Shouto's dream of eating soba with his older brother goes ignored.

and afterwards? Enji happily moves on from this with the new family he had found for himself, while Touya's childhood desire of his family looking at him is fulfilled in the most grotesque way possible. and the family's dream of having a home away from Endeavor? not a chance lmao

#man i can't deal with it anymore #NEED a fix-it #where Touya never talks to his family ever again #if this is the reunion Hori decided to give js #bnha #bnha spoilers #todoroki touya #dabi #todoroki tei #todoroki shouto #anti endeavor #bnha critical #salt #you would think enji was based on hori's higher up with the way the narrative is giving him private lap dances

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luvsturniolo · 1 year ago

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I have this cute idea for Chris. Maybe yall have been friends for a long time and he really wants something more but his commitment issues are getting in the way because he’s been hurt before but then say something bad happens and his brothers are out and can’t help and he calls you and needs you and you come right away even faster than he expected and he’s like you came so fast? And you’re like yeah, you called? and he just realizes in that moment you’re not whose hurt him in the past and he kisses you

ー ★ !! commitment

pairing : chris x fem!reader

synopsis : explained in the req :)

a/n : this idea is so cute but also so sad ?? i’m hoping to channel both of those emotions into this fic

wc : 2.5k

you’ve been friends with the triplets for as long as you can remember. especially with chris. you’d never admit it, but something about him drew you in — yearning for more.

nothing about your love for chris was lustful or anything vulgar like that. you genuinely admired and respected him as your best friend.

he was always a shoulder to cry on. he always found a way to make you laugh when he could tell you were upset. he always brightened your mood even when you weren’t feeling great. and you tried to provide that same systematic support for him. you made an effort to let him know you would be there for him no matter what.

to everyone else, the two of you were inseparable. you grew up together and nobody could get between your guys’ little duo.

but recently, he hasn’t been acting himself.

you know chris well enough to tell when an issue that’s bothering him and there’s definitely something going on. you can tell that he’s conflicted about it and the topic is serious. but you’ve got no idea what it could be.

he’s been trying to hide it, but you know that’s only hurting him more.

not to mention, he never hides anything from you. he’s never kept secrets or refused to open up. despite your efforts to try and make him explain, he won’t. and since you don’t want to pry, you dropped the topic.

it’s been a two weeks since his demeanor randomly changed. and you’ve tried to ignore the behavior, but your mind just won’t stop coming back to that same topic.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

meanwhile, chris is going through quite the crisis. you're his best friend. like, dude, you're literally his favorite person to be around. in the whole world.

but recently, he's been having too much time alone with this thoughts. this thinking time has caused him to overthink your guys' relationship as a whole. every time he thinks about you, his heart feels heavier and his stomach twirls.

the thing is, he's felt like this ever since you guys first became friends when you were kids, so he didn't think it was weird. he thought it was a normal effect that you had on people.

but when chris casually mentioned this feeling to matt, he acted like it was the craziest thing he'd ever heard.

"bro no way." matt said two weeks ago — which was when chris leisurely explained the effect you have on him. "that's not fucking normal. you need to google that because i'm pretty sure you have a crush or something."

at first, chris thought nothing of matt's advice. he assumed he was just being a weirdo ( like usual ). but the more he thought about it, the more chris realized that his brother might not be a total idiot.

after all, matt is the mental health expert of the family. who would chris be to dismiss his diagnosis?

as time went on, chris got more and more obsessed with this idea. not because he's happy about it. but because there's no fucking way he like likes you. you're his best friend. that's it. his friend. you always have been and you always will be. your guys' relationship can't change just because of some silly feelings he's not even sure he has.

but it's been two weeks and chris still can't seem to rest his mind.

he knows you're worried about him, but he can't open up to you about his possible crush. this is the only topic in the whole world he isn't comfortable sharing with you.

"so what you're saying is you're in love with her!?" nick exclaimed loudly over the phone, making chris jump at his loud voice. "like her!? your best friend of thirteen years! that one!?"

"yes!" chris yelled back into the tiny speakers of his phone. "can you quit fucking screaming now!? you're gonna make my damn ears bleed!"

"sorry that i'm taken aback by the fact that you're in love with your best friend!" nick apologized, his voice equally as loud as it was the first time he yelled.

chris sighed, flopping back on his mattress. he set his phone on the pillow beside him and stared up at the ceiling above. his eyes traced the bumps under the white paint of his roof.

nick and matt are currently in the van, driving to pick up an order of mcdonalds for dinner. chris didn't feel like going, but he always feels a bit empty without his brothers. so he decided to call them. the topic of their call moved from chris giving nick his order to chris explaining his emotions to nick simply because it's the only thing he could think about.

"did you know!?" nice shouts at matt — who's more focused on driving to their restaurant than on chris's relationship crisis. "i feel like you knew! did you know!?"

"shut the fuck up, nick!" matt says back, keeping his eyes on the road. "you know i get stressed driving at night. plus it's raining. i don't need your fuckin' yapping to distract me!"

nick groans, but apologizes anyway before leaning back in his seat and staring at his phone. he quickly notices that chris's camera is now pointed up at the ceiling rather than at his face.

"what're you doing, kid?" nick asks chris.

chris averts his attention away from his dotted ceiling and picks up his phone, holding it above his face to look at nick. "i was thinking-"

"that's never a good sign." nick jokes.

"can i fucking speak?" chris asks, clearly annoyed. nick takes the hint and shuts up, making a lock motion across his mouth to depict his silence. chris rolls his eyes before continuing, "as i was saying, i think i found out why i'm so distraught by the fact that i might like her."

"yeah, no shit." nick replies. "anyone would be freaked out at the thought of being in love with their best friend."

"not funny."

"i'm not trying to be funny." nick says, genuinely. "i'm being serious. you shouldn't feel the need to search for a reason behind your emotions, chris. if you like her, you like her. there's no point in hiding it because you know damn well she'll figure it out anyway. y'all are shit at keeping secrets from each other."

"that's true." matt chimes in from the driver's seat. nick moves the phone forward and holds it by matt's face so chris can hear him better. "she already knows there's something up with you. it's only a matter of time before she finds out what is causing you to act so strangely."

"i guess you have a point." chris agrees. "but what about after i confess and everything?"

"what about it?" nick asks. "after you confess, you'll most likely be dating. which means any issue you guys face will be one for the two of you to figure out together."

"dude, i can't date her!"

nick groans loudly, his voice nearly sounding more like a screech than a noise of complaint. matt yells at him again to shut up and nick apologizes before returning his attention back to chris.

"why the fuck not?" nick asks. "if you guys both end up liking each other, there's no reason not to date."

"yeah there is." chris says, placing his phone on his pillow again to look up at the ceiling that he's grown so fond of. the blank white color is comforting in a sense. it's something consistent that won't change or leave him unless he choses for it to do so. sometimes he wishes emotions and people were more like that. consistent.

"then explain, you dumb shit." nick urges.

"you know how my past relationships went." chris says. "none of them were healthy and i got hurt in the end of every single one. why would i willingly put myself back in that situation? i don't want to form a hatred against y/n."

nick pauses and thinks for a moment, trying to articulate what he wants to say next. but his mind is blank. how the hell is he supposed to comfort chris like this? nick hasn't been in this position.

suddenly, matt reaches behind the seat and snatches nick's phone out of his grip. matt holds it in his left hand, still driving with his right. he keeps his eyes on the road but his attention on chris.

"you guys have been friends for over a fucking decade, christopher. there's no way some silly feelings are gonna end that for you." matt says. "i've watched you guys interact for years — not in a creepy way — and trust me when i say that the feeling is mutual. i'm not gonna speak on her behalf because that's shitty. but there's nothing to worry about when it comes to her. you should know that better than anyone."

"but what is you're wrong?"

"if i'm wrong then you can punch me in the face and i'll give you a million bucks." matt says. "but more importantly, if she ends up rejecting you, i'm 100% sure that you guys will talk it out and find a way to move on past this. and even if she doesn't like you back, confessing your feelings will never be something you'll regret."

chris continues to stare at the ceiling.

the consistency of the patter slowly becomes something abstract and without any pattern. chris tilts his head back, thinking he's going crazy. because why is his ceiling changing?

but he quickly realizes that he's not going crazy. he's simply been overlooking the details of the paint for so long that everything he liked about it is becoming raw and real rather than a vision in his head that he wanted to perceive.

maybe that's what's going on with you. he's been friends with you for so long that he's finally noticing all the little details he overlooked. you're not just his best friend he wanted to see you as. you're someone who has always been by his side and someone he wants to live the rest of his life with.

"k, thanks." chris says quickly as he picks up his phone. "bye."

he hears nick and matt protest against him hanging up, but it's too late. he's already pressed the little red x in the corner. he swipes out of nick's contact and scrolls to find yours. when he sees your name, his stomach twists. despite the butterflies in his gut, chris presses the call icon and puts the phone to his ear.

you pick up on the second ring, "what's up?"

"can you come over?" chris asks, feeling his entire body go stiff at the thought of admitting his feelings to you. but he knows this is something he has to do.

"right now? it's nearly midnight, and it's raining." you point out. "is something wrong?"

chris sighs, "no you're right, never mind. i'll tell you some other time, it's not important anyway."

"too bad." you reply with a laugh. "i'll be there in five."

you guys say goodbye before you hang up and chris feels his heart sink to his ass. he runs through everything he plans to say to you, but nothing sounds as sincere as he wants it to. before long, he hears a knock on the front door and his heart sinks even lower — if that's even possible.

he exits his room and wanders down the hall, wanting to take his sweet time just so he doesn't have to face the truth.

when he opens the door and sees you drenched in rain water on their porch, he feels bad for purposely taking longer than necessary to open the door.

you smile at him before taking off your coat and hanging it on the rack you always hang it on. you come over so much that it's nearly second nature to be here. when you guys were kids, you lived at the triplets house more than your own.

"hi chris!" you say, pulling him into a hug solely for the purpose of getting him wet with your dripping hair and damp shirt.

the thing is, you hugged him as a joke because you guys always try to annoy the other. but the moment your arms wrapped around his neck, chris felt his cheeks heat up and his heart speed.

"hey!" chris said as he pushed you off of him like he normally would, hoping you don't think anything of it.

you smile at him, "why'd you call me over here? also, where are nick and matt? i didn't see the van in the driveway."

"you came so quickly." chris said, trying to avoid the topic of why he called you here.

"yeah?" you reply, curiously. "you called."

something about those words settle into his mind and ease his nerves. you're not like the girls he dated before — and he doesn't mean that in a 'you're not like most girls' way. but you're genuinely different. the way you treat him is so much more authentic than how they treated him.

when chris looks at you, he's not looking at the girl he has a crush on. he's also not looking at the friend he grew up with. you're just you.

you're the woman he wants to marry. the woman he wants to buy a house and start a life with. the woman he wants to have pets and kids with. the woman he wants to grow old with and ask to buy him more vitamins so he doesn't get constipated.

"i just wanted to talk to you about something." chris said, his voice quiet so maybe what he's saying won't be real. maybe it'll just fade into the thick air between you and you won't even ask about it.

"about what?" you ask. and there goes chris's idea of whispering.

he sucks in a breath before starting, "i've been thinking and i think the feelings i have for you aren't just in a friendly way. well, not like sexually or anything like that. that's fuckin' weird. i just like genuinely like being around you. i want to fall in love with you- well, more than i already am. also, i really and i mean really don't wanna make you feel uncomfortable. like if you don't feel the same, don't be afraid to tell me. you can say you don't like me. don't feel obligated to agree to be with me if you're not comfy. i'm not gonna be that one weirdo guy who forces you into a relationship. like, i really like you. you're so pretty, funny, sarcastic, and just my favorite person to be around. but like i said, if you don't like me-"

as much as you find his rambling adorable, you cut him off by pressing your lips to his. he's surprised, but ultimately returns the kiss and grabs your waist to pull you closer.

you smile against his lips before muttering, "i like you too."

he grins like a happy toddle before scooping you up and engulfing you into a huge bear hug. you shriek, telling him to put you down. but he doesn't. he just hold you and peppers kisses across your skin — your face, your shoulders, your neck, your arms, wherever.

he's just happy to have you by his side, knowing he's never gonna let you go. he's yours and you're his.

tags : @kasqnxx @lvrsparadise @prettysturniolo @strniolo @urmyslxt @cupidsturniolo @opheliaofficial07 @thetriplets3 @sturn1olo-ffics @uhnanix @deadxrx @kitaysworld @slaysturniolo @wilmalovegood @ladylokilaufeyson5

#luvsturniolo!!#sturniolo triplets #matt sturniolo #matt sturniolo x reader #matthew sturniolo #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader #sturniolo triplets x reader #triplets

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ghostsarepeopletoo-2 · 2 months ago

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My Live DRDT episode 16 reaction

HERE WE GO CHATT

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT

“Are we all ready to vote?” It’s so Aceover

how much you wanna bet David voted for Teruko

“Congratulations!” ITS ACEOVER 😭

“I’m proud of us-!” Can he stfu already

“What do you have to say in your defense?” Can SHE stfu already I’m sorry Hu fans but at this point she makes me want to punch the wall

“I killed her. And if you never forgive me for that, then there’s nothing I can say.” THE NICO PARALLELS?!?!! THE FOILS OF ALL TIME

“This… This all could have been prevented, couldn’t it?” YES THANK YOU EDEN

of course Eden would be the one to point that out first…

“It’s just… misfortune.” Yeah you would know a thing or two about that wouldn’t you

I actually see this line as Teruko refusing to accept either blame or the idea that she could turn out like Ace

“So we can’t possibly blame ourselves…” Hu. HU.

This time I KNOW she’s refusing to accept blame. It’s become a theme in her character, that she refuses to take criticism or herself or those she cares about. It’s a very interesting character trait and I really love her as a character but oh my GOD does she make me mad-

I guess I should specify that while it’s technically everyone’s fault that Ace committed the murder, it’s Ace’s fault most of all for making himself so unapproachable in the first place. I’m not gonna ignore that just because he’s my fav, I’m not gonna do the same thing I literally just criticized Hu for. However, it was Nico’s botched murder attempt that led to Ace finalizing his murder plan, and Hu’s blind defense of Nico didn’t help matters. Out of everyone she might be one of the people who made him want to kill the most.

“… He was happier, and he trusted people more.” “Like adding stones one a pane of glass… until eventually, the glass cracks.” Okay nvm you guys really did ruin him didn’t you

“Nico’s attempted murder isn’t a cause, it’s just a symptom…” Maybe I was wrong okay I’m sorry Hu

“Whatever. Whatever!” Uh oh

“Did you all get the Veronika virus or what?” “You all are wrong, so shut up!” I was gonna say, it’s pretty rude to talk about him like he’s not there 😭

“I didn’t want to die. That’s all.” My boy… my boy you are cooked

“Don’t think that I forgot about your secret, you damn murderer!” Man I was so sad about everything else I almost forgot about Acevi. Almost.

“It’s really funny in hindsight how you acted all betrayed when you found out Levi was a murderer, as if you were unaware that you yourself had killed someone.” I fucking hate him but fair.

I’m not gonna quote anything else David says unless it’s important because I hate him with a burning passion

“But still, I-! I don’t care what it was! I don’t care if it made me a hypocrite!” Acevi is gonna kill me dead just fyi

“I just needed a reason to stay mad at you…!” This yaoi is so doomed I’m gonna kms/j

“I can’t understand you, no matter how hard I try.”

“I need you to do a favor for me right now. It might just save your life.” Huh???? Wha??? Teruko what’re you cooking

is she gonna ask Ace to dropkick Monotv omg

“The whole reason this killing game keeps going on is because we’re all forced to follow MonoTV’s rules.” HOLY SHIT SHE IS

I wanna see a cg of Ace vs. Monotv so bad ngl

“Yeah, more murder! Wait, what??” I love this stupid cat. Rip Monotv you will be missed

“I can’t…do it.” What is wrong with him/genuine concern

“I don’t wanna die. I can’t do that-” my brother in Christ you are cooked anyway. Go out in a blaze of glory

OH MY GOD A WHOLE ENTIRE FUCKING ANIMATION!?!?!! AND HE GOT MONOTV, ITS MONOVER

I FUCKING KNEW THAT WOULDN’T WORK THERE’S NO WAY- wait did that say XF-TURE?!?!?!!

XF-TURE IS BEHIND THIS, OR AT LEAST CREATED MONOTV

Help ain’t no way Ace’s about to get cooked by a default personality 😭

“Sorry, Ace.” Help 😭

“To run this killing game until the death of every participant.” WHAT

okay lore drops this episode: XF is behind, or at the very least heavily involved in, the game. The game is designed to run until every participant is dead, implying that the mastermind wants every participant dead- possibly including themself. If that’s true it puts major points for people such as Hu, David, or maybe Whit to be the mastermind as they have been shown to have suicidal ideation. (Whit not so much but I can assume)

“I will pass the punishment for breaking the rules to the one who made that decision.” ITS TEROVER. wait but she’s the ultimate lucky so she’s probably gonna survive

imagine it becomes a running “joke” that Teruko has a near death experience in every chapter lol

ITS TEROVER- does she not gaf 😭 maybe Teruko could be up there with our suicidal peeps

she really doesn’t gaf 😭

this is so wild she doesn’t care bc she’s lucky and her life sucks and-

“I was perfectly willing to get shot.” Was???

ITS LEVIOVER NOOOOOOOO

MY POSITIVE ASPD REP 😭

ACEVI BOTH DOWN IN ONE CHAPTER WE ARE SO COOKED

“LEVI!!” Oh so you do care. Okay. Okay. A single tear rolls down my cheek

oh yeah I forgot about Charles’s whole thing. Thanks for being a good bf Whit

“His injuries are not fatal.” PRAISE THE LORD HALLELUJAH

YOU CAN’T TAKE HIM TO THE INFIRMARY YOU HAVE TO WATCH ACE GET COOKED- wait YO IS THAT A SAD WHIT SPRITE??? Isn’t that one of the harbingers of the apocalypse or smthn

Ace is gonna die not knowing if Levi survived… oghgh

Ace speeding up his own death to save Levi 😭 I’m gonna 😭

“Stop saying you can’t do it, because you can!” Maybe with the power of belief, anything is possible

Ace is gonna die and Arturo’s gonna be like “yeah Levi’s dead” like immediately

ARTURO HAVING A MOMENT THATS NOT ABOUT HIM SUCKING HELL YEAH

not Ace calling him a coward 😭 stones in glass houses looking ass

here we go boys/gn… it’s Aceover

HES COOOKED

NOT A THANATOPHOBIA THEMED EXECUTION I QUIIIIT

the last ones gonna be death by horses just watch

DID HE DIE OF FEAR???? IM KILLING MYSELF

THERES NO FUCKING WAY THAT HORSES WEREN’T EVEN MENTIONED

Teruko what’s your deal

“I’m a hypocrite” chewing on her. Grrr grrr

“I have no choice…” there is no way drdt is out here trying to give depth to the MONOKUMA equivalent, of all things. I’m out

she blames herself… honey no…

the. the ending. I’m killing myself I quit I can’t-

ace has hand trauma too??? You know what sure at this point

you don’t get any final thoughts bc I’m tired. Have a nice day

#danganronpa despair time #monotv #ace markey #david chiem #teruko tawaki #hu jing #nico hakobyan #eden tobisa #veronika grebenshchikova #j moreno #levi fontana #acevi #charles cuevas #whit young #charwhit #(barely)#arturo giles #rose lacroix

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libertyybellls · 11 months ago

Text

silver soul !

pairing; finnick odair x fem reader

summary; you’ve been reaped for the 68th annual games,as you say your goodbyes you realize the ocean is not the only thing you are leaving behind.

contains ; ANGST, sadness, unconfessed loves.

☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩

you’re sitting atop the smoothest rock nearing the shoreline, too close to be dry but too far to be soaked. the air is cool despite the season. something somber lays in the air- as if nature can read the silence between you and finnick.

oh, finnick.

you wait for him to speak, for him to say goodbye and let you go. let you move onto your impending doom. but he doesn’t speak- he doesn’t even move. no noise is emitting from him, you’re not even sure you can hear his breathing- the typically obnoxious huffs and puffs he exudes are gone and he remains next to you in these final moments on district 4- refusing to speak.

he’d prayed to any god that would listen for the 68th hunger games to have mercy on you. he wouldn’t give just an arm and a leg for your safety. he would give anything that belonged to him to ensure that you’d return home, back to him, back to whatever you two were in.

he could’ve crumpled to the floor when he’d heard your name called, when nobody had volunteered. why you? why not anyone else? anyone but her.

“i’ll be okay.”

you couldn’t promise that, you knew it was a lie, you’re only 16, you have nothing to depend on getting you through the games.

“i’ll be your mentor. i’ll find you sponsors. let me help you.” finnick pleads, his eyes lowly looking into yours.

it is only then you want to break into pieces in his arms. you want to sob. you want to retreat back to your family, back to his safe presence. he looks so pure with the sparkle of grace in his eye, deeply at variance to the picture that’s been painted to the capitol. his altruistic belief in you when even now, you are certain you won’t make it far in these games, gives you a rush.

you don’t respond to his desperate offers. you only look down to your lap- at your dress playing with the simple garment. you laugh breathily, “what are the odds.”

‘not in my favor’ he selfishly thinks. he may still have a life whether you win or lose this game- but will he be alive? will he have his anchor?

he shames the world, shames the capitol, shames all of the people who sat back and let you walk onto that stage, shames the game makers who would ever let you step foot in that arena. he needs you to be okay. this world is cruel, cruel to do this to his girl.

“please trust me, i will get you out of these games. you will be a victor and we can live in peace, y/n.”

he sins. he lies. he deceives. straight through his teeth. no matter the outcome you will never live in peace once your out of this. you will never be the same girl.

you think back to his own games. though he has yet to directly say his nightly terrors, his daily horrors, the acts he’s committed that he will never say as he looks into your loving eyes. the capitol has not had lenience on this boy, only a boy, but with troubles of a man.

there is no outcome of this predicament that either of you favor. no scenario in which the world grants you the rest you deserve. you want to scream, cry, pour your heart into him. let him fully consume every fiber that holds you together, all the words you’ve never yet said to him lay heavy on your heart. now it is your turn to stay silent, to lose all oxygen in your lungs, let the blood leave your face. but your voice fails you, “i trust you finnick.”

i trust that i am safe with you. i trust that you won’t let me die. i trust that i will make it back to you. i trust you.

he pulls you into him, his cheeks are wet, there’s a lump in his throat but he does not speak. he simply holds your head onto his chest- his fingers lock into yours as if that’s where they were made to lay.

your words continue to lie dormant in the back of your shared minds- but you let the angry waves speak for you. the greying sky share your sadness, the cold drops of water that reach your legs will bring you back to life- rejuvenate your soul ties. this is the peace you’ve been granted- this is all that is fair in your life.

only in this moment will he have you as you are now, in his arms, still so fragile but he holds you intact.

#finnick odair #finnick oneshot #finnick angst #finnick odair x reader #finnick imagine #finnick fanfic #finnick fluff #finnick smut #finnick odair fluff #finnick odair smut #finnick odair x you

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jeonscatalyst · 3 months ago

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I read this from the cult arguments so the reason why they think jikook using Buddy program for enlisting confirms them not being couples is because in south korean military service as you might already know they prohibit the gay sexual intercourse while ON BASE and if you do you face the consequences right? So according to them now that jikook are using the Buddy program by chance IF in future they come out as queer and start dating each other the government is likely to investigate them for using the Buddy program for their advantage, or say they can get investigated for falsification and breaking the law of gay relationship n all during military service and given BTS are Big deal even if jikook come out after many years they will still likely face very serious consequences for breaking the law cause you know how sk is when it comes to BTS like e.g. suga's recent incidents.

So does anyone have a better understanding of this whole act of gay se* + military service and the consequences you face like this law as whole?

Hey anon,

I made this post a while ago about this topic. You can check it out

I’m not sure if you are the same anon who sent this link of this taekooker trying to “prove” why two people in a romantic relationship cannot enlist together but this is the link…….

My thoughts about enlistment and how it works can be found in the post I linked but just to something about what these screenshots say….

This right here is what I like to call manipulation. This person has a very good knowledge of the system and what article 92-6 actually states but they use their own words to completely twist things. I’m not a lawyer but i’ve watched enough shows to know that people have gotten away with murder or heinous crimes because of loopholes in the written law so I’m pretty sure who ever drafted out military laws must know this so they must have EXPLICITLY written down everything that they didn’t want to avoid any loopholes.

Anon, I’d like you to check out what article 92-6 states and show me anywhere that law criminalizes two people being in a relationship. Is there any place the law talks about punishing two people just because they are gay and are in a relationship? I must have missed it so maybe you can show me if you find it.

This is such a simple thing to understand so I truly don’t get why so many people choose to ignore it.

The military doesn’t criminalize people being in a relationship (atleast not officially) they only have a problem with people committing indecent sexual activity on base. So why on earth would there be consequences if Jimin and Jungkook leave the military and decide to come out at some point later? As long as they didn’t break the law by having anal sex or engaging in anything the law considers indecent sexual activity, they are good. Is there any law that states that two lovers cannot enlist together as buddies? There is literally NONE! Also, this makes no sense because not everyone who in romantic relationships have sex (surprise surprise) and seeing as the military has only mentioned having an issue with sex while on base, then why would they go after people who didn’t commit a crime?

If the South Korean military didn’t want two lovers enlisting together as buddies, they would have boldly written it down. Yes, queer people face some injustice and discrimination in the military and sometimes are deemed unfit for service because of their sexual orientation which is unfortunate and sad but the truth is, Jimin and Jungkook have never come as as queer have they? So officially they are just two normal bandmates and friends who decided to enlist together and even if they do come out later, the military would have to prove that they were a couple while enlisted if they want to have an issue with it (which I doubt they would) and we all know that they wouldn’t be able to prove that Jikook were a couple at the time of enlistment unless they got caught having sex, because guess what, it is possible that they could have only become a couple after their military service. So you see how the whole thing doesn’t even make sense right. If you want to consider that the military might try to punish people for being a couple while enlisted, then there are just too many loopholes in the law. I am not even a lawyer but I can make a very good defense case for anyone whom the military tries to prosecute for this using their own written laws.

#jikook #enlistment talk

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verdantcreek · 3 months ago

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thinking about the reboot mw games collectively and it’s so sadly unfortunate because like. when put up against the other two, mwiii fails so visibly.

first of all you’ve got their thesis/emotional core, right. for mw19, it’s all about the personal motivation of being a solider, the cost of war on an individual. what it means to fight and discovering the importance of what you’re fighting for. for mwii, it’s about trust. the importance of knowing that your team has each others backs, the weight that it has between individuals. what happens when that trust is broken and how it’s found again through vulnerability, because that’s how you truly know you’re there for each other.

and then there’s mwiii..? you should let your sergeant kill a prisoner illegally so said prisoner, when he breaks out of maximum security prison, doesn’t kill your sergeant 4 years later? you should illegally kill people who piss you off (shepherd)? sure there’s the whole “never bury your enemies alive”, but where does that come in to play outside of the soap/makarov interaction? it’s definitely not a valid reason for price to kill an american general in his own office. they could’ve used it for graves if they wanted to take it a step further, but no— graves doesn’t betray the team again, for whatever reason. we’re expected to consider him just a much a member of the team as anyone else, and the narrative treats him as such outside of a few bristly reactions to his involvement.

secondly i take a huge issue with how characters were handled in mwiii. literally everyone is here, and there is no reason for several of them to be. alex felt like a cameo— you see him actually on screen for maybe 30 seconds. farah’s missions feel forced for the sake of her involvement. not that farah shouldn’t be in this game, but makarov’s flimsy reasoning for targeting the ulf is so clearly an excuse to involve her. it feels very random and transparent as a decision to reuse her character because she’s familiar. again with graves— why is he here? i still genuinely do not understand why they decided to retcon his death. it was a perfect arc for mwii to kill him, and him being alive adds absolutely nothing to the story. he has nothing to do in mwiii and there is zero reason for his involvement other than “people liked him in mwii and he has a cool accent.”

within the 141, it’s mostly rehashing of the growth/personality that each of them showed in previous games. none of them have an arc, except maybe price if you’re willing to call the *post credit scene* where he commits cold blooded murder a completion of an arc. gaz, soap, and ghost are static versions of themselves that simply are just … there for most of the plot. they’re not out of character or ruined, but none of them individually have anything going on that can’t be tied back to price.

i think a lot of it comes down to the way they tried to shoehorn mwiii into the original trilogy’s storyline. people loved those games, and nostalgia sells. i don’t think it’s a coincidence that makarov was a big marketing factor for this game— and that’s not to say that mw19 or mwii didn’t abuse that either, but in execution you can feel the difference. price, gaz, soap and ghost are all their own characters miles away from their original trilogy counterparts. makarov… isn’t. he’s a poorly written villain riding on the success of the original trilogy— he’s scary because he’s *makarov*, not because he’s a real threat. it’s cheap. the knockoff “no russian” mission felt insulting. it’s a callback with no real impact in the story, just simply “look! remember when we did this in 2009 and everyone loved it?”

and all of it culminates into a shit ending with shock factor that it tries to make you feel emotional. i’m not sad over this character death. i’m mad, because it’s unearned and lazy. i realize it’s a lot to ask a multi-billion dollar corporation to actually put effort into their stories, but… it’s such a let down when the previous games actually had at least an ounce of passion. i’m just still so disappointed with this game ruining what could’ve been a really interesting and unique story.

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starboyshoyo · 2 years ago

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Hold Me Close

Characters: Riddle Rosehearts, Deuce Spade, Ruggie Bucchi, Azul Ashengrotto

Fandom: Twisted Wonderland

Genre: fluff

Physical affection headcanons with some of the NRC boys!

Riddle Rosehearts

The teacup tyrant isn’t the most experienced when it comes to physical affection, or even fondness in general. He probably hasn’t gotten a hug more than twice in his life. When you give him a taste of what love is supposed to be like, he’s hooked right away.

The first time you convinced Riddle to sit on the couch in his room together, he couldn’t believe how good it felt to be held. He has always considered cuddling to be a waste of time that could be used for studying. He had definitely collared couples he had found snuggling up in public as well, ranting about proper conduct in the hallways and inappropriate public displays of affection and whatnot. But now, he can understand those people who couldn’t wait a single second longer to have their lover in their arms. It takes a lot of self-control not to leap into yours every time he sees you. However, Riddle’s strict mindset can’t be unlearned overnight. It’s practically ingrained in him to worry about the opinions of others, and he won’t do anything to damage the pristine public image he’s built up for himself at NRC.

The most PDA you’ll get out of him is holding hands or linking arms in the hallway while he walks you to your next class, gentleman-style. If he’s feeling a bit bolder, then he’ll give you a chaste kiss on the back of the hand or forehead when saying goodbye. It’s not that he doesn’t want to be closer to you in public; he’s just too nervous to actually take initiative.

In private, Riddle still holds true to his stiff nature, but he’s much more mild. He doesn’t mind you hugging him tightly or cuddling into his side when the two of you are in a room alone. Normally, he will automatically assume the position of the ‘holder.’ He wants to be your protector and make you feel safe with him, like a traditional gentleman. He loves it when you hug him by looping your arms under his and placing your hands on his upper back. It reminds him of the position used for ballroom dancing, an elegant activity that he associates with fairy tales and true love- intimately close, yet still proper and pure.

The only time Riddle’s rational brain will shut off and his inhibitions disappear entirely is when Riddle is upset. After collaring someone in public, he’ll rush for privacy. When alone, his frustration tends to pour out in angry tears. He’ll immediately seek refuge in your arms when this happens. Please, just hold him close. Let him bury his face in your neck and cry his heart out. It’s quite sad to see, but crying helps him get his stress out in a healthier way than screaming at Ace and Deuce.

Finally, when Riddle is in a serious, committed relationship, he’d be willing to share a bed with you. It would take a long while to get to this point- he wants you guys to have discussed and laid out plans for a future together before even considering it. Sleeping is when he’s in his most vulnerable state- the fact that he trusts you enough to ask you to stay with him at night is a testament to how much he loves you.

A lot of time and effort would be spent in a relationship with Riddle, but in the end, you are the only one who gets to hold him at night. And seeing his relaxed face and peaceful breathing while he rests on your chest is all worth it.

Deuce Spade

In spite of the honors student act and tough-guy demeanor that Deuce tries to maintain, he is so very soft. No matter how much time passes, Deuce will never not get excited and flustered when you cuddle with him, even if it’s just a simple side-hug in the classroom after a lesson. He’ll sit up straight and stiffen, cheeks burning and lips pressed together in an effort not to let out a shrill squeak. If you kiss him, expect him to pull you in closer and hold your hands, gazing at you with wide eyes and telling you he loves you as if he’s confessing for the first time, all over again. It's enough to cause anyone around you to gag on the sweetness and sincerity that pours out of this boy.

Deuce is inexperienced in romance, and pretty shy when it comes to initiating things. He doesn’t want to come off as pushy or disrespectful, so for a while it might just be you who asks if you can hold hands. The more you show him that you want affection from him, the more confident he’ll get at initiating it himself. Slowly but surely your boyfriend will begin to brush his fingers shyly against yours, and lean in just a little closer when talking to you, hoping you’ll get the hint and just kiss him already.

If you ask for a hug, Deuce will say yes, no matter what. He spent years playing the part of a delinquent, and refusing the hugs his mother offered him at that time. It pains him to think of how much that must have hurt her, and he never wants you to feel that way. In a way, Deuce sees your affection almost like a second chance to do things the right way.

In public, Deuce wants to uphold the image of an honors student. That means no making out in the open. He will want to hold your hand, hug you, and spend moments snuggled up side by side on benches around campus, though. While a bit flustered that someone would want to be so close to him, he’s never embarrassed to be seen with you. He wants the world to know that you’re together. You love him! … You love him.

Deuce changes his levels of PDA depending on who’s around, and how comfortable he is with them. Deuce wants to earn the respect of his housewarden (and also doesn’t want a collar around his neck) so he’ll hold off on kissing in front of Riddle. He’ll still hold your hand gently, and Riddle will be able to see how hard Deuce is trying to be proper for you. He can’t fault him for that.

With Trey and Cater, expect a very shy but affectionate version of Deuce. While he won’t initiate anything on his own in front of them, Cater will probably make a comment that gives him the push he needs to give you the attention you’ve been waiting for. Trey is more subtle about it, but don’t be surprised if he ‘accidentally’ brings one less fork than needed for the treats he baked, so that you have to share one. He might even teasingly suggest that you feed Deuce, if he’s feeling mischievous.

Around the other first years, Deuce is a lot bolder when it comes to affection. Ace and Epel seem to enable him a bit, with their constant teasing, and besides, they already know how Deuce is as a person. There’s no pressure to act proper, so he’ll pull you in for lip kisses and be direct when holding your hand. If you point it out though, he might become shy again and push his face into your shoulder to hide the flush on his cheeks. Please don’t tease him, he just wants to love you.

Ruggie Bucchi

Ruggie is a bit unconventional when it comes to contact. His main form of physical affection is play-fighting. It’s not unlike the courtship rituals of certain animals that will wrestle and chase each other around before pairing off. Ruggie will take the slightest bits of affection as an invitation to tackle you and roll you onto the couch or bed or even the grass. It turns into a tussle, with the both of you trying to pin the other and make them concede.

This usually ends in one of two ways- Number one is the normal outcome. You’ll roll around until one of you ends up sitting on the other’s back, with a few bruises to show for the effort. The loser has to buy lunch that day! (It really doesn’t matter who buys the food, you end up sharing all of it anyways.)

Number two is when Ruggie is feeling romantic and realizes that wow, your face is super close to his right now, and that he really, really loves you. Abruptly, the wrestling will stop and he’ll pull you closer to him, burying his face in your neck and giving you a gentle nip. When you yelp, he’ll giggle into the spot- shishishishi, I gotcha now. Even when drunk on love, Ruggie is playful.

When it comes to traditional PDA, Ruggie is as shameless with you as he is with his meals. Doesn’t matter if you’re in class, walking around campus, or straight up sitting on Leona’s bed. He will try to make out with you and no, he doesn’t care who sees. He wants the world to know that hey, he’s yours. You chose him and he chose you. There’s nothing they can do about it, so don’t even try! If you are uncomfortable with the level he goes to though, he will ease up and opt for cheek kisses or slinging his arm around your shoulder instead.

While not a form of physical contact, Ruggie loves it when you wear the few articles of clothing that are actually his and not Leona’s hand-me-downs. Things like his bandana scarf are precious to him because he worked hard to be able to call them his. So seeing you in them makes him feel like you’ve accepted him into your heart, truly and fully.

Azul Ashengrotto

In private, Azul has no problem giving you a gentle kiss or two or letting you sit on his lap and lean on his chest while he works out new ways to scam his customers. It makes him happy that you enjoy spending time with him even while doing mundane things. Time passes so much quicker when you’re around. However, when it comes to more intimate activities like makeout sessions, he cannot initiate one without dying inside a little bit. How is he supposed to ask for something like that with a straight face?

Please run your hands through his hair. He loves it and cannot get enough of it. In fact, Azul just loves being pampered in general. He always wants to be the little spoon when you share a bed or lay down together. Rub his back, tell him he’s handsome and shower him in kisses. He will eat it up like a starved man.

Azul is suave in public, and very good at hiding his emotions. But even he can’t hide how much he adores you. It doesn’t matter if you want to hug him around the waist in public or nuzzle into him- he can’t say no to you, nor does he want to. He’ll try to deflect the flustered look on his face and stay calm, but he just can’t when you’re so close to him.

Just like Riddle, Azul will have to be very comfortable with you before he trusts you enough to let you sleep in the same bed as him. Azul actually reverts back to his octopus body when he’s exhausted enough- and early on he’s terrified that you’ll be disgusted at his true form. He’ll go to great lengths to make sure you never see it- at least until you get serious. Then, he’ll tentatively reveal it to you. When you tell him he’s beautiful, he’ll bawl his eyes out and squeeze you tight enough to crack a rib. You’ll have sucker marks on your skin for a week after that.

Oh dear. The octopus escaped his pot again and now he’s clinging onto your leg. Once Azul gets his arms around you, he will not let go for anything. He’s desperate for sincere love and will milk your attention for as much as it’s worth. Indulge him for a bit- he needs the reassurance that you want him as much as he wants you.

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

#twisted wonderland imagines #twisted wonderland headcanons #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland #disney twst #twst #twst x reader #twst wonderland #twst riddle #riddle rosehearts x reader #riddle rosehearts #riddle x reader #deuce x reader #deuce spade x reader #deuce spade #ruggie bucchi #ruggie bucchi x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #azul ashengrotto

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trashytoastboi · 6 months ago

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Day of Dominance - Diavolo

~SFW Alphabet~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

👑 Attention, affection and connection. Diavolo truly thrives on the attention you give him. He understands having to respect his image and will be reserved due to that even though all he wants to do is be affectionate towards you. It’s reserved for when it’s the two of you, or at least when you’re with the circle of people who already know. They all confess that Diavolo’s PDA is a bit much but he trusts them enough to drop his image a little in front of them. Barbatos is just used to seeing Diavolo smothering you with his touch. He’s like an oversized kitten.

B = Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

👑 The always busy but never too busy for you friend. His responsibilities keep him busy and Diavolo himself is craving any excuse or reason for a break, you give him the perfect reason for that. Honestly watching him sneak out of the castle is funny in itself. He instantly lights up the room with a natural charisma to him, but when it’s just the two of you he’s more focused on having fun. You go quieter places, Diavolo has even attempted a few disguises and the two of you head out incognito. Diavolo usually always has something he wants to try so you’re always doing something different, trying a new place to eat, walking around, shopping, or even going to some of the attractions in the Devildom that his usual fame doesn’t allow him to.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle)

👑 Diavolo loves cuddles, if he could have you on his lap while he cuddles you on his throne he really would. Barbatos tells him it’s not the proper decorum though :( Enjoys being both the big and little spoon, the little spoon more on days when he’s really exhausted and frustrated. He’ll just snuggle up to you and lay his head on your chest with his arms around you. He won’t say anything, you could sense his unease though and cuddling acts as a form of comfort for him. It also helps him fall asleep when his mind is too busy.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

👑 1/10 on domestic skills, not for lack of trying. His cooking is better than Solomon’s. It looks similar and there’s questionable taste. It’s probably going to give you food poisoning but not threaten your life like a certain sorcerer's concoctions of the kitchen. He does try he really does but unintentionally creates more work, an example is when he decided to join you for doing dishes after dinner at the House of Lamentation and broke more plates than he washed…Barbatos very dutifully took over for him. When it comes to settling down, Diavolo regards you as one of the most stable pillars in his life. One of the more honest and genuine people. He loves that about you and settling down doesn’t seem a far stretch from his desire to just be with you all the time.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

👑 Puts on demon lord mode. He’s suddenly serious and very formal. He says what needs to be said and he’s eloquent about it. The moment he’s finished all of his practiced words, he is trying to hold himself together because he’s more heartsore and sad about this than you could imagine. He might cry a little the moment he was left alone. He doesn’t do it without reason either and will explain his side of things so there are no questions left unanswered, it’s the least he could do. It’s painful and upsetting for both of you.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quickly would they want to get married.)

👑 He’s all for it but the decision is not his alone, an unfortunate circumstance of his position. If he does announce his desire to marry you- there would be opposition and a lot of politics involved. Diavolo honestly doesn’t want to involve you in that sort of mess. He’s devoted to you and you’ve never questioned that before. However, Diavolo might keep his desire to marry you to himself.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they? Both physically and emotionally.)

👑 He’s a sunflower to you. Endlessly gentle and you think it's sweet how the strongest demon is the squishiest with you. He’s got a good sense of his strength and knows not to overdo it with you. His extra care always shows through his actions and how he handles himself around you. Emotionally he’s soft, sometimes he gets wrapped up in trying to keep his problems to himself and shuts you out as a result of that.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

👑 Diavolo is a fan of hugs and says they always recharge him. You adore how he brightens up after a hug, whether it’s a quick one or a longer one. If he’s able to, he'll pull you into a quick hug before running along to his next meeting, just to give him a little extra spring in his step. If he has the time and the privacy he pulls you into those tight hugs. Feeling your warmth and form in his arms. He’ll just enjoy the moment with you, and rest his head on yours.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-Word)

👑 He’s a master of choosing his words carefully and preventing any slips of the tongue. You’re probably one of the only people who can get him all tongue tied, breaking the infallible appearance he cultivates for others. The simple words bear a heavy weight when there is meaning to them, Diavolo understands this well and so he didn’t throw them around meaninglessly. He meant it, whenever he told you he loved you. It was his honest feelings, and he said it pretty quickly, because he just knew he is so in love with you.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they're jealous?)

👑 Diavolo doesn’t show his jealousy even if he really is jealous. He’s not vengeful or angry about it. It makes him more insecure and sad than anything, he’s just envious that he isn’t spending as much time with you as others are. He’d never choose to isolate you, nor is he thinking that it’s something else. He trusts you implicitly. It’s more his own desire to spend more time with you and honestly…He’d like to have your attention on him. He enjoys when you dote on him and it makes him sulk a bit if you’re not doing it as much.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

👑 His kisses are sweet, and very passionate. Diavolo has to limit himself to little pecks, or a kiss on the hand if he’s careful about the eyes that are around. When comfortable and not caring about the company there, (mostly his inner circle and those he trusts) he’s more open about it. He kisses you deeply, with all his repressed affection. He likes kissing the top of your head, your nose, your lips and your hands, he likes being kissed by you- full stop. Doesn’t matter where, but if you kiss his hand he finds it adorable and it makes him a little bashful.

L = Little Ones (How are they around children?)

👑 He’s loud, boisterous and energetic. He has a friendly feel to him and children naturally gravitate towards Diavolo. He’s good at handling kids, he knows how to talk to them and they seem to naturally follow his lead. Diavolo finds kids really cute, yeah they can be a bit messy and disastrous but it's just because they’re kids. He’s forgiving, patient and understanding. He never raises his voice in anger but he can get a little nervous if the kids get too rowdy because he’s concerned about them hurting themselves.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

👑 Mornings with Diavolo are a little more relaxed than one would expect. A big part of that is thanks to Barbatos, he wakes the two of you up with some tea. While getting ready Barbatos has already sorted out breakfast and he’s on top of everything. It’s a little weird not doing anything, but from the moment Diavolo wakes up he’s already preparing for the day. Trying to get his schedule in order and make sure he knows all the meetings he has to go to, responsibilities he has to attend to and anything else. He always makes time for a good morning kiss though.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

👑 He’s tired, sometimes a little more stressed than he lets on. He just wants to spend time with you, unwind and maybe do something he doesn’t often have time for. He’ll lay in your arms and ask questions about the human world and humans. He’s excited to learn about you and your home. He asks the strangest questions at times but you know it stems from genuine curiosity. As long as he can rest a little and be with you he’ll unwind enough to fall asleep. Something he really appreciates is when you let him lay his head in your lap and you pet his head or play with his hair. It puts him to sleep every time.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while and reveal things slowly?)

👑 He’s easily open and honest about most things. To you at least, but he’s lived a life of having to bury his real self under pressures of a position and facades by necessity. It takes a bit more trust and comfort before he’s opening up his true self to you. You feel like you’re looking at a different person whenever you see him concealing himself to evade showing weakness or what could be perceived as weakness in his responsibilities.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

👑 Patience is a virtue, one he has plenty of. It isn’t often when you’ve seen Diavolo truly angry, maybe never. He holds back a lot and tries to find a more diplomatic and calmer way of solving things. Even in moments of intense duress he keeps his head about him, he has too. He can get worked up but he deals with it really well and tries to work through it rather than acting on it.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing or they kind of or forget everything?)

👑 He’s excited to learn about you and will ask various questions pertaining to ANYTHING you tell him. He’ll remember the things you tell him, sometimes details get a little muddled because he has a lot on his plate but you appreciate the amount of thought he always gives with anything and everything he does for you. If he does forget something he’s honest, he’ll apologize and ask you to remind him. Usually a little reminder sparks it again and he’ll be able to recall the finer details.

R = Remember (What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

👑 The first time you snuck him out of the castle to go on a secret date. It’s his favorite memory. How you very bravely broke into the castle without getting caught (You did but you somehow convinced Barbatos to let you go and not mention anything to Diavolo) you gave him a very interesting disguise and the two of you snuck out (it wasn’t that hard since Barbatos practically let the two of you out) and went around Devildom on your date. The awkward part was both of you getting back and Barbatos, true to his word of pretending not to know anything, was waiting for Diavolo, late at night asking where he had been if not in bed.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

👑 Diavolo is protective of you in different ways and he always asks you to take care and stay safe. Whether he is protecting you against a threat- say a rabid monster, or something like safeguarding you from the snakes who are trying to undermine his position he does it gladly. He wants you to be safe and happy, he’s often got to think about the good of Devildom in his decisions but he always tries to find a way and means to protect you. You protect him in every way you can, despite his protests, you want him to be safe and feel like someone has his back no matter what happens.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

👑 Within his means (limited time) he tries his hardest to make things happen. He pushes himself a little hard with work to free himself up for the evening so he can invite you to eat dinner with him, he ropes Barbatos into helping him decide on gifts, or plans for anniversaries where to go and what to do if it’s romantic enough for the two of you. Sometimes his plans don’t always work out and that's okay because you know how hard Diavolo always tries for you.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

👑 Trying to shoulder the burden and bear the weight of the world, always. In a sense it’s not an overstatement considering he is the leader of the Devildom. Diavolo tries not to rely on others, and he has a difficult time asking for help and communicating that he needs a little rest. Instead he’ll stretch himself thin, overwork himself and burn himself out. It’s awful to see and you always tell him to rely on you more because you can handle it. Diavolo is insistent on bearing his own work, much to your frustration. You can only support him quietly as much as you can and hope to relieve some of his struggle.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

👑 He’s sensitive to his appearance, he has to be. If he looks a little sloppy or unkempt people could pick him apart and question him over something so insignificant. Diavolo is very involved in the upkeep of his appearance; everything from clothing to grooming is meticulous. He actually enjoys the days he gets to dress down a little and when you tell him his bed hair is cute and just love him no matter what his current state.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

👑 He’d feel your absence deeply. It will affect him for a long time and he’d find himself unable to concentrate on work or his day to day tasks, his mind would constantly go back to you. He’d mope a lot because he wants you here with him and if you’re not it makes him worry about you. If you’re doing okay, looking after yourself, if everything is fine. He wonders if you think about him even a little as much as he thinks about you. Diavolo didn’t realize he would be so affected by someone as much as this.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them)

👑 He likes it when you come to visit him while he’s holed up in his office. Your presence makes him happy and even if you’re doing your own thing while sitting with him, Diavolo is happy and can work a little faster and with more energy. All for the sake of finishing up quickly so he can spend time with you properly. Barabatos invites you over whenever he feels Diavolo is struggling because you have such a positive effect on his work and his general well being.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn't like, either in general or in a partner?)

👑 He doesn’t like unkind and deceitful people. Those who approach him with the intent of using or manipulating him for his position alone. People who come with false intentions are the worst kind and Diavolo has had to deal with the type since he was very young. He’s gotten better at discerning people and the reasons for them approaching him. He forges new relationships with a lot of internal hesitation and keeps them very much at a distance until he’s certain of their intentions.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

👑 He wakes up a lot in the middle of the night and his sleep is usually disturbed because his mind is too busy. He’ll lay awake, tossing and turning and trying to sleep. He finds the nights when he gets the best sleep is when you’re with him. If you have to get up in the middle of the night whether for some water or needing the bathroom, if you don’t give Diavolo something to snuggle in your place then he’ll wake up and be sad to see you’re not next to him. He’s extra clingy when he’s half asleep.

Taglist: @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf @roninfromtheops

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justali-anne · 12 days ago

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Thought Week: Flowey

Flowey is apparently the most popular character right now! And while that is really intriguing, I'm not surprised! He's one of the most complex and most tragic characters in the entire game. So, here are my thoughts about him.

(BTW, if you want to share your thoughts on Flowey, please reblog and share them! I love it when people come together to talk about a certain character, it brings a sense of community and I REALLY want to be a part of that. So please, reblog!)

(Also, the subheadings are gonna be colour-coded based on the character. I love colour-coded characters with a passion.)

First Impressions

I first encountered Flowey during my MLP phase when I was 11. I was watching a Fluttershy Plays Undertale Let's Play, and to be honest, I didn't think much of Flowey at first. To me, he was just the meanie that tricked Fluttershy into running into his friendliness pellets. I was more focused on Fluttershy, to be honest.

However, that is my earliest memory of Undertale. My first exposure to Undertale, funnily, wasn't Sans. It was Flowey. Well, Fluttershy, but Flowey was the first Undertale character I ever saw. Toriel was the second.

And I only just saw Flowey as a cheeky flower with a thirst for blood. I didn't look into him as anything more than that. Not until I got into Undertale as a 16 year old, anyway.

When I actually did get into the Undertale fandom and learned about his backstory, I thought, "Oh. That's a cool character. A sad one, but cool nonetheless." He was interesting, but not my favourite. I liked his sassiness and his tragic side and his creativity, but other than that, there just wasn't a lot I could say about him.

My Thoughts Now

Frick, I love this guy! Not as much as the Skelebros, but he's by far one of the most interesting characters in the whole game! While there wasn't a lot I could say about him in the past, there's definitely a lot I can say about him now!

By the way, I'm going to talk about Asriel here too, since I consider them to be the same person. Well... They are, but I think people tend to forget that.

One of my favourite things about Flowey (and Asriel) is that he's actually a genuinely creative person! He's creative in such a childlike manner, and I find that so very charming. Some of his incredible creations include things like...

Photoshop Flowey!

And the God of Hyperdeath!

Just look at this kid go!!!!! He is clearly a creative genius!!!!

No, but seriously, he gives heavy edgy 12-year-old vibes, and that just works so well, Toby Fox is so good at writing complex characters, it's just... AJEJHFHSJSJG. ...!?:.

It really hammers home that Flowey is a CHILD. He is a child who never got to grow up, who went through something insanely traumatic, who misses his best friend, whose loneliness has driven him to commit terrible acts just to FEEL SOMETHING. I used to see Flowey as a sadistic villain! But now it's just... sad. Sad and nuanced.

Even Flowey isn't all evil. Heck, I have a hard time even seeing him as evil anymore. He's definitely a bad guy, but he's just so... tragic.

Honestly, I think people often forget about Flowey's ability to be GOOD despite his lack of compassion. He is capable of making good choices! Mostly during the True Mercy ending, but even without a SOUL, Flowey is still capable of being nice. And that is another thing I like about him, and something I feel like should be discussed more often.

This is only one example.

Flowey and Asriel

There's a lot more I can say about him, but these are the first things that pop into mind when I think of him. He's such a sad character, it's not even funny. Personally, when I write him, I like to write him as very nuanced. His psychology is what I'm most interested in. The same can be said for a lot of characters, though.

To me, Flowey and Asriel are two sides of the same coin. Simultaneously, I see them as the same person. They represent periods in his life. Asriel for the simpler, happier times, before everything went to shit (excuse my language), and Flowey as the traumatised result of that shit.

And no matter what he does...

He can never get those simpler times back. And that's why Asriel can't stay...

People always talk about Asriel as this sweet-hearted, innocent crybaby, but I think that Flowey gives hints as to what he was really like in life. He was someone who would do anything to make his best friend happy, who liked to engage in mischief, who was a sore loser. And yes, I still think he was a kind-hearted soul... When he had a soul. I still think Flowey has some shades of kindness in there. Some emotions too.

Flowey ISN'T emotionless. I think we know that already, though. Throughout the game, Flowey displayed emotions like frustration, fear, excitement, sadness and grief. He GRIEVED for the loss of his compassion. For the loss of his best friend. But eventually, he just became numb to it, especially after he got the RESET ability.

Oh...

The Narrative

Flowey is up there as one of the most important characters in the entirety of Undertale. That is just a fact.

Story-wise, his death, as well as Chara's, set in motion the series of events that led to what the Underground is like by the time Frisk falls down. It created a whole domino effect! If it weren't for Asriel's death, Asgore would have never made that policy, Toriel would have never retreated to the Ruins, Alphys wouldn't have done those experiments, Sans wouldn't have found an anomaly in the timeline, and so on.

In a meta sense, Flowey is also the most important character, especially when it comes to resets and time loops. Imagine having the power to do whatever you want and take away the consequences. It sounds exciting, but eventually, you just grow numb to it all. Perhaps you'd want to try something different. Something more... extreme. He reflects the player in such a terrifying way, although I can argue that he had more freedom than Frisk because Frisk is literally being controlled by us, and in terms of exploration, we don't really stray off the path that much. But Flowey could go anywhere, do anything, and that's what makes him more scary.

Also, I've just had a thought. In typical RPG games, you come across enemies and bosses that you have to defeat (usually by killing or dismantling), and if you fail to do that, you die. "Kill or be killed".

And that's why Flowey's so important. If it weren't for Flowey, we wouldn't have Undertale the way it is. He's more than just the main villain, he's a representation of a player who's been playing the same game for far, far too long.

Conclusion

I like Flowey! He's not my favourite, but I can see why he would be to a lot of people. His tragedy, his creativity, and his role in the narrative are the three things that stick out to me about him the most.

But most of all... I love that he's essentially a bratty, traumatised kid.

I haven't covered every single aspect about Flowey, but this is just thoughts about him, this isn't an analysis or anything.

If you want to add your thoughts about Flowey, please please please please PLEASE add them in the notes! I wanna see people come together to talk about a character, it would be so cool!

See you tomorrow with Papyrus!

#undertale #flowey #my thoughts #thought week

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respectthepetty · 2 months ago

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Pride Petty Watch (SOTUS) 2/5

Since so many people voted for the two blacklisted shows I was supposed to watch during Pride, it unlocked the wild card of me rewatching my sworn enemy SOTUS. I don't remember anything about the show, and the only thing I truly took away from it was hating Krist for the last eight years, so I'm settling in and revisiting the past to figure out why I forgot about every single plot point of this show including that Jan was in it and that Kongpob x M were the perfect ghost ship.

I left off praying that Arthit gets meaner before he gets nicer, which I consider as getting better before he gets worse, but since I'm getting Dangerous Romance flashbacks flash forwards, I doubt Arthit can commit to bullying Kong much longer before he turns full simp.

How am I not supposed to root for Kong x M when M looks so devastated every time Kong leaves his side to go talk to May. I know M likes May, but the way these scenes are set up, it's hard not to think that M likes Kong and he is in pain when everyone else gets his friend's time since he has known Kong SINCE JUNIOR HIGH!

Thrilled that Wad is always ready to lay hands first and ask questions later. Also excited that he is motivated by pettiness just like me, so the only reason he is playing in the tea product placement game is just to spite the seniors. Petty work makes the dream work. Amen.

The pink milk in this series needs to be studied because on one end of the spectrum, we in BL Land know the pink milk is a staple of a Thai BL (which is slowly coming back in Last Twilight, Only Friends, Addicted Heroin and I Saw You in My Dream), but on the other end, the show itself treats the pink milk like those dumb hot takes from people asking if drinking fruity cocktails makes a man a fruit, or if sucking on popsicles makes a man want to suck a dick, or if eating food in general makes a man queer. It just feels as if this show treats Arthit that way every time he orders it, like "GOTCHA, QUEER!"

If I were that food vendor, and Kong started popping out with these little nuggets while Arthit just kept threatening him, their business would be all up in the group chat because I'd be messaging all my friends that these two gay guys were practically foreplaying right in front of my salad pork skewers.

So of course Arthit would show up to the game just to stand there and glare at a man drenched in sweat from playing a hard game of basketball like the internalized-homophobic asshat he is.

God, some things never change.

WE GOT COCA-COLA MONEY?!

I gasped not because of the note on this conversation but because of the comment coming from AN OPENLY GAY MAN on the hazers squad. I am not Thai, so the only way I can relate to the hazers is through Greek life (fraternities and sororities), and even a long long time ago, I knew openly gay men in frats, and they pulled ALL the girls since girls felt safer around them than the straights, but the look Prem and Arthit are giving Tuta when he says this is what I'm laser-focused on because they show toleration rather than acceptance. I'm taking those looks personally.

Arthit continues to say Kong's face is annoying, but he never says it's ugly. Sir, I see your gay awakening on the horizon.

AND M WITH THE FUCKING LOOKS AGAIN! He is looking at Kong on stage then looking at May looking at Kong on the stage, and I know where this is going, but my god does it feel like M is sad because he believes Kong is straight and wouldn't reciprocate the feelings he has for his best friend SINCE JUNIOR HIGH!

I have made it clear that I do not like Krist (I believe his acting is flimsy but I can't even act like I like people, so who am I to judge), but I don't think the people behind the filming of this show liked him either because these opening title cards between the parts of the episodes are doing him dirty.

Excuse me, little stage presenter, I need to know what the fuck was going on with this performance that they had a western theme with modern guns. Was it Big Sean's "I Don't Fuck With You"?

And why is Jan looking like Taylor Swift in "Teardrops On My Guitar"? This show was in 2016, but the styling and hair are in 2003.

Now the judges are coming for Kong, and Lord knows he is going to answer in the most uncontroversial way because Kong refuses to pick a side against hazing and the boy he likes being punished by.

*eye roll* I did not think I'd make it here this quickly, but I'm on Arthit's side because Kong IS annoying. Jan's character looks full-on Stockholm Syndrome into the camera when Kong is answering, yet homeboy is just over there giving the most ridiculous reason of "our hazers have their reasons for hazing us" and now I see the direct line to GMMTV forgiving parents for abuse (Double Savage!).

Kong can play basketball really well. He remembers everyone's name. The whole class wanted him to be president. He is great in school. Now he is the Freshy Moon. Marsha, Marsha, Marsha. I hate this kid.

M, my most beloved, now I see why you're quiet a lot.

I appreciate M for also stating that Kong is just great at everything without trying, but it also feels that he is hyping up his boy because he has been IN LOVE WITH HIS SINCE JUNIOR HIGH!

In a room full of people, only Kong notices that M is unhappy, and now I see the direct they-are-married-but-not-a-couple line to Peaceful Property. New understands these roles well.

THE QUESTIONS THAT NEED ANSWERS! Can you run 54 laps, Arthit? Can you squat 200 times, Prem? These freshmen won everything, yet Arthit is still being a dickwad, and he just got his ass off of school probation. Bold move, sir! I want the juniors to suffer. Except for Bright. My boy has never done anything wrong, and if he did, he didn't.

I saw an umbrella in The Ex-Morning pilot trailer, and if that show doesn't give me a scene of these two arguing in the rain over the dumbest shit, then what is the point?

All those people watching Arthit, and none of his boys could run with him? If the purpose of hazing is unity, obviously the juniors didn't get that memo when they were being hazed as freshmen, so why continue the traditions that they don't even abide by?! Arthit is better than me because I would have crawled my ass back to my dorm before accepting their help SINCE THEY DIDN'T EVEN RUN LAPS! And now this little freshman wants to be up in his face. What's the point of the umbrella now?! He is a boy in a BL who has been in the rain for hours. HE IS ALREADY GOING TO DIE NO THANKS TO YOU UNHELPFUL DOUCHE NOZZLES!

I was just on Arthit's side, but then the show decided to tell me that entire seniors-hazing-the-juniors thing was a setup, and mixed with most of the images on Arthit's door being black-and-white, and one of those images being Charles Manson's Rolling Stone cover, I'm back to hating him again. So in case anyone is still following along, I now hate both of the leads. Can I get M and Bright back?

Kong says several times that Arthit can punish him, then he irons Arthit's clothes. If this show would just lean into the kink of it all, I would embrace everything about it. If Kong could just be a masochist dom, I would be delighted. JAPAN, COME HERE RIGHT NOW! Fuck remaking Love in the Air! Remake this kinky shit instead!

This is what a sado sub looks likes and Japan would know exactly what to do with him. Now I'm mad that I'm watching the babygirl-fication of a perfectly good jerk.

Well hello there you two! You wanna make out before going to the hospital? Maybe keep it all a secret from everybody else? I'm so pissed that I can't remember this plot now because I don't think they will be a thing BUT THEY WOULD BE PERFECT!

And I'm still rooting for my boy M to get his best friend since unlike Arthit, M can at least acknowledge that his friend is pretty to his face. No internalized homophobia here but probably because M isn't even a homo. I've sailed ships with less.

😬🥴🙃 Thank you subtitler for keeping the word. It's important. So are the looks that I'm taking personally. And BRIGHT IS THE ONE TO SAY IT! So I like M now and only M. Everyone can eat dirt and choke.

Arthit's nickname means warmth? I'm starting to remember why I forgot this show. Like Celine Dion, "It's All Coming Back to Me Now"

And I hate it.

#pride petty watch #sotus #sotus the series #This pink milk situation is causing havoc for me #yet I still remember nothing!#I have no clue how this is going to go #but the rage is still very much in my body #and now I'm upset that Arthit isn't the worst #just let a bad bitch be bad for goodness' sake!#Kongpob x M is my ultimate ghost ship

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misrepresentedmorallygrey · 8 months ago

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PROPAGANDA

John

This fella is Fascinating. just trust me on this he deserves to be here

He tried so hard to do the right thing, he feels bad and says things would be better if he was never born. He thinks he should've just stayed acting like a monster and continued to act threatening.

(LONG PROPAGANDA INCOMING)

John. Milgram. Here's a short description of the fortunes and misfortunes of the guy. It gets worse before it gets better (probably).

While MILGRAM is a prison that judges a bunch of sympathetic killers, it doesn't consider him to be one – it didn't even exactly know he existed until too little too late, when it got its grabby hands on the brain of prisoner 009, who claimed to not know anything about any murder he'd have committed. Then, footage from his brain was extracted, as MILGRAM does, into a music video, and… that was MeMe. Ninth prisoner, Kayano Mikoto, was revealed to have DID, and what obviously who do you think actually Killed Someone?

Enter John. Well. Mikoto is half deeply unaware half subconsciously scared of his existence, so the MV painted him in a rather. Deeply disturbing way, bathing in bloody baths and all that (not a blood bath though! easy mistake). Adding to that him showing up in the first Voice Drama for five seconds to punch the "protagonist" and yell for a bit, and the result wasn't. Assuring. The fandom proceeded to treat him like a cardboard cutout and variously dunk on MILGRAM for having a cliché "evil" character w/ DID despite the overall well handling of complex characters.

Two years time skip: second season ending. We get to prisoner 009 again. The protagonist Finally gets to chat with John: and voila, he's admitting to the crime, he's apparently "killed a bunch of people because they annoyed him", which means, as he's saying, Mikoto has nothing to do with the crime at all! And he, as per the judging system, should be forgiven, right! Well, he's so full of shit. The music video immediately reveals how protective he feels of Mikoto (and well, he definitely doesn't rebuke That one), that the events of murder were somehow tied in to Mikoto's job at a black company, his continuous overworking and him being mentally on the brink of breaking; that any committed violence was For The Sake of Mikoto and that John feels deeply horrible for messing up his life in any way. By making himself into the image of a "monster" he's trying to make Mikoto look good in comparison and be forgiven and all. He also mentioned if Mikoto is voted innocent he's gonna try to go dormant since he's The Issue, right, and the audience/protagonist hates him, Right, and Mikoto Also Hates him, Right?

I'm underselling the sheer devotion of this guy tbh.

Yeah, the fandom results were kinda mixed on that one. Lots of people immediately started to love him dearly and kinda forgot any people were maimed or killed with baseball bats; lots also got sold on him "messing up Mikoto's life" and actually voted Mikoto innocent Specifically because of John's promise to eventually "disappear". There's more of the babygirlifying kind in the English side of the fandom that I've seen, to be fair. And that's around where we are!

Dazai Osamu

He did bad things in the Mafia. He's trying to get better. He abused people but he also saved other people. Fans portraying him as an unforgivable abuser are WRONG. He perpetuated an abused cycle on Akutagawa thinking he was right to do that, because of trauma, before he could leave. But he left. He's still treating Akutagawa wrong because he's trying to be a better person but doesn't realize that it will not erase what he did and that he can't just ignore the past. Fans portraying him as a pure angel who didn't know what he was doing because he was sad are WRONG TOO. He abused Akutagawa. He was traumatized but it doesn't give him the right to traumatize innocent people. He's trying to be a better person but he can't keep ignoring Akutagawa. He needs to apologize. And even that won't erase what he did. Dazai is a complex character in a complex situation. He left the abuse cycle and tries to be a good person but did unforgivable things while he was still in this cycle and refuses to aknowledge them. He's not a monster but he's not innocent either.

Dazai used to be a mafia executive until his best friend (a former assassin who remained in the mafia but refused to kill) died. As the friend was dying he told him "I know you don't care about whether you're a good or bad person, so if it doesn't matter to you, be on the side that saves people." Despite that, I've seen countless people insisting that Dazai is a good person/trying his best to be a good person when he really only changed sides by joining a detective agency, while still continuing to do the same things he did while in the mafia (including but not limited to: harassing his coworkers for fun, manipulating people, killing people instead of just trying to incapacitate them, and even torturing an innocent man in one of the side stories). That being said, he's not evil either. Even when he does cruel things, it's not for the sake of being cruel (even when he harasses his coworkers he still has limits), it's just a means to an end. I think most of the confusion comes from a scene where he's talking to a young girl, another former mafia member, who asks if he thinks people can change and he assures her they can, but what the anime left out was that he was thinking about his former assassin friend during that discussion, not himself. The entire series is themed around gray morality, to the point where it's even reflected in the main protagonist and antagonist's designs (mainly white with a bit of black, and mainly black with a bit of white), so I feel like insisting that he's a good person now completely misses the point of the story.

#misrepresented morally grey #round 2 #bracket d #mixed bracket #milgram #john milgram #bungou stray dogs #dazai osamu #osamu dazai #cw suicidal ideation #edit: y'all i did not realize this was qued for later lol #only realized when I saw more dazai propaganda that I didn't see when I was making the polls

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burplewrites · 9 months ago

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saudade | tamarack & qiu

𓆉 | fandom: our life: now & forever

𓆉 | characters: tamarack, qiu, reader

𓆉 | word count: 1,075 words 5,946 characters

𓆉 | a/n: this story is sort of in qiu's pov, and about grief and stuff!! i don't think its too sad, just an experience but you have been warned!

𓆉 | quick summary: y/n passed. the world just needs to learn how to deal.

saudade is an emotional state of melancholic or profoundly nostalgic longing for a beloved yet absent something or someone.

“and you two are gonna grow up someday and i’m gonna grow up too, but that’s never gonna stop us from being the same age. cool.” that’s what they said, eight years ago, when they first met y/n and tamarack for the first time after the duo waltzed their way into their life.

ever since that fateful day, the three were friends, best friends. even with the little break of their friendship from ‘personal problems and moody feelings’ as y/n used to say, y/n brought them together again and reminded them why they were friends in the first place.

their friendship only got better from then on, and they committed to bettering themselves and each other, talking about problems, and about random thoughts that entered their minds. at least, that’s what qiu thought. he thought that they all told each other everything, all their stupid secrets, random thoughts in the middle of the night, things that would be considered too much information for other people. so why didn’t y/n tell them, not tamarack or him, anything about what they were going through? why didn’t they say anything at all?

they never expressed pain, or acted like they were suffering at all. they were always smiling, expressing their positive emotions with not a care in the world. qiu loved them for that. they had been crushing on each other for a while, qiu knew that, y/n knew that, and even tamarack, who had to watch the whole thing unfold in front of her, knew that. they just never got together, and now they would never get the chance to.

it was only a year ago when their life changed. when tamarack yelled in the middle of the night, alarming everyone out of their drowsy state, y/n was having trouble breathing, and was trying to get upstairs to their mother's room without disturbing their best friends on the couch. their limbs started giving out, making them fall to the floor. that whole night was a blur for qiu and tamarack alike. watching their best friend’s mom trying to help y/n take some breaths as they all cried, seeing the tiredness in y/n’s eyes, like they’ve been fighting this for years and was finally starting to give up, and opal’s sobs as she begged her only child to keep trying, to keep breathing. tamarack clutched hard onto qiu that day, the shock causing her to freeze up.

hearing their best friend's last words, being so weak, so quiet, yet so genuine. it was like y/n trying to fully get everything out like they knew this would be the end.

"hey its okay, you're okay… you're okay. i love you guys so much, more than you'll ever know."

that's what they whispered, as the paramedics took them away. a smile never left their face, even with the ventilator on their face and the paramedics checking their vitals on the way out the door. they died on the way to the hospital. even to the end, they were caring for others.

opal changed as a person after that. having to bury your only child, someone who you watched grow up, someone who you experienced their good days and bad days, and was just expected to keep moving. but that was impossible, how could she? her world stopped that day but everyone kept moving, the world kept spinning at the same speed it always did, no faster, no slower.

but y/n was gone.

tamarack put her whole being into her cello practice since y/n always seemed to like it when she played for them. she even played a song she wrote at the funeral; a song that was supposed to be for her best friend. one that they were somewhat writing together. she still tried being normal, helping opal with whatever she needed, but never trying to pressure her. it was tamarack's form of escape. if she could be in the house that y/n was in, surrounded by all the things that made them, them… that would be enough. it had to be enough. qiu simply regressed into themself. it was like they were back to when they were fourteen. they stayed outside sitting by their ‘hideout’; hiding away from the world. tamarack tried to stay with him some days, when qiu wanted the company and couldn’t deal with being alone without someone to talk to, someone who understood, but other times it was too overwhelming and they preferred to be alone.

life changed. golden grove moved on, and people found other things to talk about, but sometimes things brought them back to that day one year ago.

especially today, the one-year anniversary of y/n’s death. three hundred and sixty-five days without them. it was early morning, around five am, and qiu biked to the cemetery to just be with them alone. they knew tamarack would be coming in the morning after she woke up, and opal would be coming in the afternoon, so this was the best option. plus they couldn’t sleep.

qiu never knew they could cry that much. every time they came to visit, to talk about something exciting that happened, or something weird, or anything really, they would end up breaking into sobs each time, gasping for air by the time their tears ran out.

‘why did you even have to come into my life if you were going to leave it partway?’

that was a question that they asked themselves multiple times and always felt bad for thinking about it after. they knew tamarack felt the same. tamarack was the first of the two to mention that thought out loud.

but it was true, wasn’t it? they never regretted having y/n in their life. everyone's life shone so much brighter with them there, like the sun on a summer day, but with the sun gone it gets darker. the sun always comes back, but y/n wouldn't. y/n was dead. they were gone, and they were going to stay gone.

no matter how much opal begged, how much they all hoped and dreamt, y/n was not coming back. they were never coming back. they had been gone for the last three hundred sixty-five days, they would be gone for the next year, and the years after that. and nothing could change that.

so as qiu sat there, laying by their grave while talking about everything and anything, all they could really do was hope y/n was there and listening.

#our life #our life now and forever #qiu lin #tamarack baumann #tw grief #burplewrites #fics #tw grieving #hopefully this doesnt like ahcdnmsjkfdsm

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