#Javi looking fresh and clean

[roanofarcc]

YOU, BRIGHT BLUE

pairing. tyler owens x reader

summary. between the moments of chaos of storm chasing, tyler finds the break in the storm when with you. 

warnings. shy/introverted reader, fluff!

word count. 1k || masterlist

To cap off the end of tornado season, it was a tradition for someone from the wranglers to throw a little celebration. It was Tyler’s turn and he had, lovingly, suckered you into helping him with the promise of picking up your favorite dessert for after the dinner. 

It was the first party with the newest additions of Kate and Javi to Tyler’s team, and they were warmly welcomed with light teasing that Boone insisted was mandatory hazing. Everyone ate until their stomachs were beyond stuffed, but no one wanted the night to end after that. 

You had suggested a bonfire. Tyler had been excited about the new fire pit he had built in his backyard, and the only people who had enjoyed it so far were the two of you. You often rounded off your date nights back at his place, making s’mores and talking until you couldn’t keep your eyes open. 

Even with the addition of Tyler’s team, you two still found yourself in your usual spot around the fire, seated on a blanket in the grass. You sat with your legs outstretched and Tyler rested his head in your lap. As the team laughed and reminisced on their favorite stories from the season, you absentmindedly ran your fingers through Tyler’s hair. He chimed in now and then, but when he wasn’t talking, his attention was on you. 

His bright eyes studied you in the firelight like always, but no matter how many times he looked at you, he found something else he loved. Every shy smile you gave Kate when she complimented your cooking or light laugh you gave to Boone’s terrible jokes. Despite your quietness, he could tell how much you enjoyed the company of his friends, which he was relieved to see. Tyler had gotten good at reading the little tells in your face since you weren’t much of a talker.

Just by the crinkle of your eye or twitch of your lip, he knew almost exactly what you were feeling. And at the fire with his team, you looked happy, which was exactly what he was hoping for. You hadn’t been around for more than a couple dinners and hang-outs with the team, and he knew they could be a tad overwhelming from time to time just because of their ever-bounding excitement. But knowing that you enjoyed their company as much as he did felt like a weight off of his chest. 

Dating you was a different experience for Tyler. He used to think he needed someone who matched his energy or exceeded it; someone boisterous who didn’t know how to slow down. But he had learned rather quickly that was like burning the candle at both ends. Meeting you showed him the beauty in slowing down. He spent his days chasing after roaring storms, wrapped in the heat of adrenaline and pounding hearts. And don’t get him wrong, that was what he loved about storm chasing, but he needed something different when it came to relationships. 

You didn’t come barreling into his life at top speeds, crashing into him. You floated in like a gentle spring breeze, soft and calm. In his breaks between storm-chasing, you were his breath of fresh air. It was your slow pace of life that made him fall, hard. But instead of running blindly into relationships, as he had a habit of doing, he played the long game until you became so integral to his life that he knew he had to make a move. And lucky for him, you had fallen just as hard. 

It was early into the wee hours of the morning before the team finally departed, giving each other tired goodbyes before they’d spend some time apart, going on much-deserved vacations and returning to their ‘normal’ jobs until it was time to chase again. 

While Tyler walked his friends out, you started to clean up a little, yawning as you did so. You were so tired, half-heartedly washing the dishes, when he came back inside and appeared behind you. He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close before resting his chin on your shoulder. Soft kisses peppered the side of your face and neck, causing you to smile. 

“Come on, these can wait ‘till morning,” Tyler whispered, sleepily. 

“Let me just finish these,” you said, but he didn’t let go. His chest was flushed against your back, warming you up more than the fire outside had. He was quiet as you washed the last plate; you placed it on the drying wrack just before he tugged you backward, away from the sink to stop you from cleaning up anymore. 

He loosened his grip just enough for you to turn around to face him, resting your arms lazily around his neck. “Thanks for helping me with tonight,” Tyler said, his voice barely above a whisper like he didn’t want to disturb the quietness of his home in the late hours. 

“Of course,” you replied, peering at him with the very expression that made him fall in love with you. 

There was a beauty to tornados, one that was difficult to appreciate unless you understood them the way he did. The black and green skies, the rotating clouds that dropped down, and the deep grooves they left behind in the ground all held a certain beauty, but it was very different than how he’d describe you. You were bright blue skies and sunsets that resembled paintings. To him, you were the calm before the storm; the stillness that blocked out any rational sense that something dark was looming in the distance. 

He brushed a thumb across your cheek and kept his hand holding the side of your face. You yawned again before you kissed him quickly, too quickly if you ask him. “Ready for bed?” you asked, your eyes nearly drooping with your words. Tyler answered with a nod, leading you back into his bedroom where you had claimed your side of the bed. His pillows smelled like your shampoo, and he never slept well without having you in arm's reach. But that night he didn’t have to worry about it because he fell asleep with your head on his chest. Instead of staying awake in search of answers in the dark skies, he dreamt beside you of bright blue scenery.

[pedgito]

𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘 𝐋𝐀𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐑𝐘 | Joel Miller x reader

↝ masterlist | requests? | ao3 | update blog | fic rec | ko-fi

summary | you've got an issue and joel's willing to solve it. after all, what are neighbors for?

author's note | this was a prompt from a meet-weird thing i saw ages ago that was originally supposed to be javi, but jo (@undercoverpena) gave me the beautiful idea of making it joel and it spurred this monster.

content warning | established friendship, caught during sex, does the apocalypse having working appliances? probably not, but for the sake of this fic distend belief i beg. oral (eating out from the back), unprotected piv, subtly cocky!joel miller, he's a good ass neighbor, okay?, unbeta'd.

word count — 5.6k

Joel’s fixed this damn machine seven times, convincing himself every time that it was the last time. Shocker, it wasn’t. This time didn’t even last a month. He’s desperate now.

He would usually haul the load all the way to the communal laundry house closer to the group of joined townhomes that housed most of the younger adults—the spry and bright-faced ones who sprung up at the mention of patrol or work, any prospect of toting a gun around with any sense of leadership. They were eager, he couldn’t say the same for himself.

He was old, weathered—years of routine he had created to get the job done and get the hell home.

And truthfully, as he tapped the wrench against the metal machine, chin tucked into his palm as he scratched at his beard, he almost complied with the idea that he would just have to tough it out. Scrounging for parts was nearly impossible—dumb luck, really. In the past several years they’ve picked this town clean, bone-dry.

He’s elbow deep inside the barrel of the dryer when he hears the knock at his door, bumping his head against the rim of it as he exits and cursing under his breath as he pushes to stand, joints creaking and popping in disapproval. 

He can smell you before he sees you, the familiar scent of fresh-baked goods following you everywhere—Joel couldn’t feel guilt for being one of the folks addicted to your cooking. 

Grains had been hard to come by since the epidemic hit, everything was tainted on a global level. It took years and years of Jackson growing its own stock of wheat for things like pie or a nice, gooey cinnamon roll to even be plausible anymore. But, they were managing well so far.

“Saved ‘em for you and Ellie,” You tell him, a small plate of still hot brownies covered with parchment paper, dawning that trademark smile that Joel has come to love, tapping his fingers against the door frame as he passes the plate off to a quickly approaching Ellie.

“Girl’s got the nose of a basset hound,” Joel looks on in amused bewilderment as Ellie throws a mouth-stuffed thanks over her shoulder, “sorry ‘bout her.”

You wave her off whole-heartedly, taking in his sweaty appearance and casual attire. You were used to him in jeans and thick flannels, not a graphic tee and pair of sleep pants. He’s almost always dressed like he had to run at a moment's notice, you weren’t even sure he owned anything different until now.

“Everything good?” You question him, a small laugh escaping your throat.

“Damn washer and dryer is out again,” Joel explains, throwing a hand vaguely over his shoulder.

“Both of them this time?” You ask, “Damn.”

“I can fix ‘em, just a matter of finding the right parts,” Joel tells you, “ looks like I’m gonna have to hand wash again.”

Joel was a friend. You helped friends. It seemed like a no-brainer really, opening your mouth without thinking it through, the kindness tumbling out despite yourself.

“Oh, you’re welcome to load yours up at mine,” You offer and Joel looks immediately apprehensive, the southern charm and well-mannered tone gearing to creep up on you.

“Now, I don’t mean to make you feel like you have to—”

“Joel, I wouldn’t offer it if I didn’t feel comfortable with it,” You remind him, “seriously—anytime, just try and bring your own detergent—and for the love of god, empty your pockets before you put ‘em in.”

Joel chuckles tiredly at that, rolling his eyes as he nods in agreement.

“Got it, of course, sweetheart.”

“I leave an extra key under the rug, so if I’m ever not home just come in,” Given that Joel was Tommy’s brother, you knew he wouldn’t be up to any trouble, “sound good?”

“Yep. Anytime—just make myself at home.” Joel confirms and you nod with an even wider smile, waving a pleasant goodbye as you trailed down the stairs and made your way to the house you inhabited next door.

Right, anytime.

Unfortunately, Joel took that a little too literally.

-

Joel managed to scrounge up the courage a day later, tumbling into his house on tired legs after a lengthy patrol up at the cabin lookout, scooping the basket up in his arms and heading out his front door, taking the short walk to your house.

The lights were off, but that wasn’t unusual. Joel knew you liked to stay late nights in the town’s mess hall, often working on prep for the following morning to make the load a little lighter and sleep in a while longer, so when he fishes under the doormat for the key he thinks nothing of it.

And as the door swings open, it is still fairly quiet. Though, he can hear your own dryer running upstairs. He’s got the layout down too, having shared more than a few nightcaps with you. Friend to friend and nothing more, even if you had always felt a little more strongly toward being affectionate. A hug or a kiss on the cheek from time to time, he never pushed you away. Joel never seemed like the type of man who openly showed affection, even toward a friend. But, he was good, reliable–most of the time.

He reaches the stairs with trepidation as the sounds grow louder and part of him wonders if by some uncanny coincidence your dryer might be growling and rumbling on its own final leg. 

The moment his hand reaches that doorknob and turns he realizes he’s made a mistake.

He’s caught you at a…bad time. Head thrown back with your mouth hung wide, whatever noise you’re making was mostly drowned out by the nagging sound of the dryer as it tore through the spin cycle but he hears the tailend of it, a soft moan of pleasure from the man who’s buried inside of you right now, both of you naked from the waist down but your breasts on full display with your shirt tucked under your neck.

“Benny?” Joel asks, slightly amused.

You lift your head at the sound and spot him, your feet nearly slipping out from under you as you scramble to push Benny away, who perks with an even more perplexed, “Joel?”

“Goddamn it, Joel,” You curse behind gritted teeth, furiously readjusting yourself, pulling your sweats back on and over your ass and your shirt down, “What are you doing here?”

Joel looks down at the basket still clinging to his hip before back up at you, wordlessly.

You sigh through your nose with a tight lipped frown, cheeks puffing out as you brushed your fingers through your hair and down—Benny was still scrambling to redress behind you, unable to pull his gaze away from Joel.

“Benny?” Joel mouths at you quietly, eyebrows raised curiously.

You walk toward the now open door slowly as Benny buttons his pants and you shoot Joel daggers with your stern gaze.

Cut it out.

Joel smirks slightly, cheek dimpling with the action as he side-steps Benny, who leans around you and kisses your cheek—it was a kind gesture but given the situation, in horrible taste. You force a polite smile and once Benny is a far enough distance you hit Joel firmly in the arm as he passes by you and into the laundry room.

You walk Benny to the door with a million thoughts racing through your head, offering a distracted goodbye before you’re locking the door and racing back upstairs with determined footsteps and Joel has already loaded his clothes in the washer, turning the knob to set the load size and time.

“Benny?” He echoes his earlier questions, “Really?”

“What? Are you judging me?”

“No—just, that kid’s had quite an obsession with you for some time now. Just…surprised is all.”

Your lips pull together in a disapproving but nonchalant frown, taking his words for the bullshit they are.

“When I said anytime that did not extend to the middle of the night, Joel.”

“You’re usually still at work,” He supplies—and really, he’s not wrong, “M’sorry. I mean that.”

“Well, now I’ve gotta deal with the fact you’ve seen me naked,” You cross your arms over your chest and lean against the doorframe and Joel’s eyes track you for a moment, smiling with amusement at the thought.

“What? You want a fair trade?” Joel teases, “‘Cause, darlin’. I don’t mind—but it was an accident. Besides, ain’t nothin’ I haven’t seen before.”

He means it in a broader sense, but you can’t help the eye roll it induces. 

“No, no,” You chew at your bottom lip, watching Joel place the empty basket on top of the washer, “I can finish that up if you want to get some sleep. I know you had a long patrol today.”

“Oh, did you?”

He’s teasing you.

“Don’t push it, old man,” Joel shakes his head at that jab and chuckles, “Ellie clued me in when she picked up some sandwiches for her and Dina earlier.

He’s not going to pass on the offer, though. He nods, rubbing a hand over his tired face.

“Jesus—just…Benny?” Joel reiterates again, “Didn’t think the kid had it in ‘em.”

“Out,” You say with an over-pronunciation as you drag his slow and progressive steps further out of your laundry room and into the hall, “or you’re off my dessert list for a month, Miller.”

Joel smiles at you knowingly, “You wouldn’t dare,” He retorts, knowing you too well.

You wouldn’t make him suffer like that. Or Ellie, who wouldn’t hesitate to murder Joel if he robbed her of that pleasure. Not literally…but, she would carry a few choice words for him.

“Seriously, though, thank you,” He nods, leaning down to press a kiss into the crown of your head—an often familiar gesture when you parted after a long night of nonsensical talk and a couple glasses of wine or whiskey, depending on how hard the day had been, “I appreciate it, sweetheart.”

“Yeah, yeah—”

“And I do apologize for…not knocking and showin’ up at such a weird time.”

You shrug, “You’re forgiven. Just…don’t give Benny a hard time. He’s a good guy.”

“You’ve got my word, darlin’.”

Joel was determined to be on his best behavior, clearly.

-

It takes Joel a couple weeks to find the parts he needs and luckily there are no more run-ins on your midnight sex-scapades, still feeling the embarrassment from the first one. Joel doesn’t even seem to remember it after a couple days, thankfully. He was bypassing it for your own benefit, truthfully. And you knew that.

Selfishly, you're glad to have your appliances back to yourself. 

They’re good, solid, reliable—until they aren’t.

Your washer shits itself mid-load and you can hear it from downstairs. A loud screeching noise before an even louder pop that has you groaning loudly because you know. You can feel it.

You can’t even bring yourself to go check, peering through the window of your kitchen and catching a fresh pot of coffee in the house across from yours, a man coming into view and his stark white shirt contrasting the black coffee cup in his hands. He catches you out of the corner of his eye and looks at you with a quizzical amusement, smile tugging at his face.

Joel was always up before the sun rose, so with the sun just creeping into the sky you’re sure that’s his third or fourth cup of coffee. He reaches over his sink and fiddles with the latch on his window before heaving it up, watching as you struggled to do that same but eventually managed.

“You run outta coffee again?” He asks, sipping at the bitter, black coffee in his mug.

“No,” You reply quickly, slightly exasperated as you chew at your bottom lip, debating how to pop the question and feeling nervous under Joel’s intense gaze, curiously wondering if he’s still picturing you naked. He’s never explicitly mentioned it since, but you have caught him in the act.

Wandering eyes, gazes catching when your back is turned for half a second as you bend down or move in a way that exposes too much skin.

“My washer broke,” You cut to the chase and Joel chuckles at how comical it is, in hindsight.

Was this karma? It was definitely karma. 

You’ve never asked Joel for anything—despite your often bouts of kindness toward him you never expected anything in return, not even a favor.

“Doors open,” Joel nods toward his front door out of view, an invitation like you offered him.

You didn’t even hesitate, pushing the window close and bounding up the stairs.

-

You’re already loading your things into his washer before he appears around the corner, peeking his head in, coffee cup still in hand as he takes a few more steps and leans against the wall beside the washing machine and your eyes glance at him briefly before you continue moving the clothes, watching him watch you from behind the rim of his mug.

“I can start them and come back,” You tell him, “so I won’t be lingering around here all day.”

“No Benny?”

You stand up as you close the washer, deadpan stare pointed in his direction.

“You can be such a nosy neighbor, you know that?”

Joel shrugs, a smug smile covered behind his sip of coffee.

“It was just a few times. Besides he’s…too much for me.”

You turn the dial to start the load and it rumbles to life with a simple press of a button.

“You wanna talk about it?”

It wasn’t completely unnatural for you two—you knew quite a bit about Joel now: his life before, his work, his daughter…all things that come with trust and time. He’s waited patiently for you and you’ve given him peeks into your life, but nothing like this.

“It’s a long story, Joel.”

“Got time,” He smiles slightly, “I’ll go grab you a cup of coffee—sit down.”

You look around briefly, not a chair in sight. So, you raise yourself up just enough that you can slide your ass over the top of the washer, bare feet dangling off the floor and you wait, the subtle and quiet shake from the beginning of the load process keeping the awkward silence at bay.

Joel turns the corner a few minutes later with your cup, made up just to your liking and you nod with a gentle smile, taking the cup from his hand and allowing yourself a few generous sips.

“So—that night, you caught us,” You can laugh at the instances now, so you do in a soft, clipped manner, “it wasn’t the first—it had been a month by that point and he just caught me by surprise, showed up that night and things just got a little out of hand.”

Joel’s eyebrows raise in interest but he urges you to continue, leaning against the wall in front of you now, resting his mug on the shelf just above his head as he crosses his arms over his chest.

“He’s a good guy, don’t get me wrong—but I don’t do serious…I can’t, now with how things are. And I know a lot of people think the opposite, seize the moment and all that shit,” You sigh, a deep and heavy sound that expands and releases from your chest, “he was already talking about moving in, the idea of us having kids—so that night I just tried to distract him.”

“With sex? Seems a little…counter-productive, don’t you think?”

“Don’t judge me, Joel,” You warn him but it’s edged with a playfulness that Joel recognizes. You didn’t have a mean, deceptive bone in your body and Joel knew that from the first conversation he had with you.

“I needed him to shut up,” You groan at the thought of the conversation as it replays in your mind, “I’m trying to wash my clothes, he’s talking to me about babies. I do not want kids, Joel. Ever. At least none that are biologically mine. Who would want to bring a kid into this world?”

Well…Tommy. The thought comes to you after the words have already left your mouth and your heart sinks into your stomach, looking at Joel apologetically.

“Sweetheart, don’t even try to apologize. Ain’t nothing wrong with it.”

“It makes me sound horrible, I know but—”

“I’ve done my time—it’s none of my business how others choose to live. Besides, I’m pushing sixty, I don’t have to worry about all that…sorry, I’m not trying to be crude here.”

You nod knowingly with a smirk tugging at your lips, taking another sip of coffee before handing the mug off for him to place it next to his own, ready to slide off of the washer before Joel interjects with another question that catches you off guard.

“He treat you right, at least?”

You tilt your head with that same knowing smirk, pushing Joel away at his hip with your foot as he leans up from his position against the wall—Joel’s never flirted, always promptly skirted around the issue and went about it more gentlemanly. He’s not abrasive and straightforward like most of the men in Jackson, but damn did he know how to make you feel special.

Undivided attention, constant subtle compliments, giving up some much-needed sleep for a simple late night drink with you—part of you was too terrified to make your own move and make it clear just how badly you wanted just a small taste of him.

You’ve heard whispering, minimal talk from a few of the women in town. Joel didn’t often make his rounds but when he did, he left an impression. And you had every right to be jealous, because with him standing in front of you now—you knew it would be easy to say no and he would fix you right up, finally crossing that line that he’s been carefully dancing around for a few years.

“He’s a bit…timid,” You shrug, “and he doesn’t really…”

The air lingers and the side of Joel’s mouth pulls up—you don’t have to say it.

“Joel, don’t do that,” You shove at his shoulder as he approaches you, his hands pressing into the contraption you’re on, curled around the metal, “—he’s just…eager, but not in a good way.”

There’s a glint in Joel’s eye that leads you to believe he’s not thinking about Benny’s less than experienced sex life, feeling the sudden jitteriness from the coffee as your chest rises with a deep, shaky breath and Joel eyes the time over your shoulder.

Forty-five minutes and some change, plus the time to dry because Joel already knows you aren’t going to trouble yourself with walking the damp laundry through this cold, muggy weather.

“So, no then?” Joel asks.

He could have treated you better, sure. But, he wasn’t the worst.

But, the way Joel is staring at you knows makes everything and everyone dull in comparison.

You shake your head in agreement, chewing at the inside of your bottom lip as your hands fall to your lap, his hands ncreasingly closer to the tights covering your legs, suddenly feeling his thumb graze your hip. You both glance down at the action and your breathing halts, watching as his right hand slowly engulfs your thigh, fingers digging into the soft material and dimpling your skin underneath, his thumb only a few centimeters from dipping into the inside of your thigh.

They part on their own, welcoming Joel in wordlessly and his left hand echoes the other. His face is level with your own, staring down at your lips briefly before meeting your eyes and you’ve seen that look before—the adoration when he thought you weren’t watching, secretly you had become good at catching those glances, but Joel wasn’t trying to hide it now.

And it quickly dawns on you in the moment—he was jealous. Of Benny. Or really, any man that had come before him. But, he was using him as the scapegoat.

Honestly, you couldn’t even care.

“You want someone to treat you right?” He speaks softly and if you weren’t so close you wouldn’t have heard him, “I got you, sweetheart. I swear.”

He’s not looking at you anymore, eyes dragging down the bridge of your nose to your lips again. But, you are looking at him, flooded with that tricky feeling that creeps up on you when you want things you know you shouldn’t.

“Joel, I told you—I don’t do serious,” And you hold your breath for the response, wondering if that would send this moment crumbling to dust, but Joel doesn’t miss a step.

“Good for you,” Joel dotes, “neither do I.”

Then he’s on you, the press of his lips in a heated kiss sends you tumbling back, caught by the warm slide of his palm over your back to pull you in, throwing your arms over his shoulders as he pulls back briefly, just enough for you to open your mouth to speak, but his tongue finds its way inside and the words fade away.

Just friendly, my ass—you think.

If you had known he kissed like this—you would’ve jumped at the opportunity months ago; a night spent drinking too many glasses of wine and laughing over some movie far before your time, but not his. 

He was so entranced, giving you all the details, but you couldn’t help giggling over it, too touchy to be considered friendly.

You’d both cut it short quickly when Ellie popped in halfway through the movie, and beyond that, it never grew.

Until now.

“Sweet,” Joel notes with a subtle smile, his hand dwarfing the size of your neck as his fingers wrapped around the column of your throat, holding you firmly in place as he maneuvered you toward and away from the kiss as he pleased, swallowing every tiny moan that escaped your lips when his other hand squeezed at your thigh just a little too hard.

“All that sugar,” In your coffee, the taste lingering on your lips and he licks around them teasingly, pulling away briefly to look at you, your eyebrows raising in question as the gears turn in his head, “—you still with me?”

“I’m just wonderin’ if you’re okay with this,” Joel speaks candidly, his eyes trained on his thumb as it rubs against the middle of your throat, traveling up under your chin and tipping your head up slightly, watching as you swallowed, “before I take this further, jus’ need to know.”

You nod jerkily, not even a second of hesitation. 

“You would have known the moment you kissed me, Joel.”

In turn, Joel nods slowly before he speaks, stealing the air from your chest.

“Alright then, pull these down for me,” He tugs gently at the material clinging to your thighs before both of his hands find the spot behind your knees and tug until your feet hit the floor, “and push that pretty little ass out for me.”

The absurdity of this language on his tongue makes you giggle but abide in an instant, struggling slightly as the material bunches at your ankles and Joel helps you the rest of the way, tossing your pants aside before he’s kneeling despite how his body protests, too eager to give you a taste of the pleasure you deserve and he’s grabbing the cheeks of your ass and squeezing them between his hands before he’s leaning up to bite playful at the soft flesh.

He groans quietly against your skin, the press of his aquiline nose against your ass as his fingers fold around the string of your underwear and pull, dropping them down to your ankles and off and then his tongue is flat against the seam of your cunt, gasping as you fall forward and your own fingers clawing against nothing.

“Joel!” You squeak out as his fingers dig hard into your ass, forcing you up on your tiptoes as devours, licking into your cunt as it quivers around his tongue. 

Your hand pressed against the wall in front of you to keep your chest from hitting the washer, feeling your pussy tighten around the finger that enters alongside his expert tongue, a soft groan erupting out of him from behind you. That smug motherfucker was attempting a teasing huh under his breath as he busied himself with the task of eating you out from the back and you couldn’t even think straight. 

‘C’mon, baby,” He coos between his alternating licks and slurps of the heady slick that dripped from your cunt, “come all over my mouth, let me taste that sugar.”

It’s absurd, the way he’s speaking to you now. Your eyes squeeze shut as his thumb finds your clit amongst the chaos of his tongue and fingers, face heating up at how noisy your cunt sounded over the dull shake of the washer and Joel’s satisfied moans, occasionally massaging at the back of your thigh when your legs shake with the creeping feeling of your impending orgasm.

“Oh,” You squeal, reaching behind you to dig your fingers into his hair, panting out in desperation, “—fuck, don’t stop! Joel, right—right there,” and then glance you take back at him, his eyes peeking open from his position below, on his knees and dutiful to you and you alone, well…

It sends you tumbling over the edge as his thumb rubs over your clit quickly, soothing you through the aftermath as he laps up the mess you’ve made all over yourself, dragging his tongue along the inside of your thigh because if you knew anything about Joel, he didn’t waste a meal. 

And you were just about the finest he’s tasted.

You clear your throat as you rest your feet flat on the floor, feeling the faint quake in your legs as Joel rises slowly, forcing you to swallow down a giggle as he winces and he can see it on your face.

“Worth it,” He excuses himself, “don’t look at me like that.”

“No old man jokes?” You sound sad and Joel can’t believe it.

He shakes his head.

But, the smile that breaks out on your face quickly diminishes any comeback he has.

You begin to push him away with a hand gripped in his shirt, carefully avoiding the obvious bulge in his sweats as you reach for your tights, ready to redress and drop to your own knees as a favor but his fingers are wrapping around your wrist, pulling your attention back to him.

“I meant it,” Joel tells you, tilting his head to catch your gaze.

You smile wide and tilt your head to mirror him, “I think you proved your point—Benny is a pathetic man who doesn’t know how to make me come, blah blah…”

“My job ain’t done if you’re still thinkin’ about him, darlin’.”

His eyebrows raise in challenge.

Okay, you’re game.

Wordlessly you allow the hands at your hip that guide you toward the front of the joined appliances, his fingers sliding under your top until you get the hint to pull it off, your breasts bouncing free from the shirt—the few bras you had were already in the wash, big deal.

Joel chuckles and stops for a moment, admiring the sight of your breasts for the second time that month, albeit more openly this time. He reaches forward and rubs his thumb along your nipple, watching the nub harden under his touch and you bite at your bottom lip, eye fluttering closed at how sensitive they were to touch, something other men never took the time to notice.

“You like that?” Joel asks with a creeping grin.

You nod, watching as he squeezed your tits in his hands, showing your nipples ample attention as he circled them with his thumb before leaning down slightly and swiping his tongue over the hardened nubs, sucking your breast into his mouth and his eyes peer up, gauging your reaction which quickly developed from a soft giggle to a loud moan.

“Clothes,” You breath out, “off—if you still have a point to prove.”

A point that you wanted proven. Hard.

Joel pulls away and yanks his shirt over his head, allowing you an unobscured view of the mix of muscled shoulders and his softened stomach, running your hand over the patch of hair at the center of his chest and down, right along his hips until his own fingers hook around the fabric and pull his sweats and boxers down in one motion, his cock catching against the edge of his waistband before it bobs back up toward his stomach.

You find yourself smiling despite yourself, forgetting for a moment that Joel was standing there and watching you, feeling your mouth water at the sight of him hard and leaking at how just getting a small taste of you had turned him on that much, precum leaking slowly from the tip and he wraps his hand around himself, other hand tapping at your chin to drag your attention back up to his face, reminding you he was still there.

“Got somethin’ on your mind, sweetheart?”

You shake your head furiously, “No, no—no, nothing. Just, uh—”

“I’ll start slow,” He tells you and with the size of him, thick and girthy in ways you’ve only imagined or pictured in your head, it’s daunting, “are you still alright with all of this?”

Your face softens and you nod, appreciating the repeated check-ins, the need for confirmation, but it pulls at your heart as you wonder why he feels the need to ask so much. As if he was fearful you would change your mind on a dime—Joel was fine with that, but he was more worried about the change in dynamic. Thankfully, you were determined for that not to be the case.

“I’m pretty tough,” You shrug, a playful smile gracing your face.

Joel nods absently as his fingers drag along your waist before catching behind your knee and pulling it up over his hip, both of your eyes dragging down to his cock as he tugged at himself a few times, his brow furrowed as he spread your lips apart with the head, dipping his hips down slightly to catch against your hole before he pushes in slow, one solid stroke that steals the sound from your throat and transfers to his own. Joel groans out softly as he pushes into you, his hands gravitating toward your face and wrapping around the sides of your neck, tilting your head back to mouth at your skin, his tongue dragging along your collarbone before sucking and nipping gently at your skin.

“Don’t I know it,” Joel responds after a while, “find something to hold onto.”

Your soft giggle of excitement shoots down to your core and your fingers wrap around the edges of the washer and Joel pulls back swiftly before he’s snapping his hips back into you before repeating the process several times, the jolt of the machine hitting the concrete wall behind you drowned out by your loud moans, quickly swallowed up by Joel’s lips as he pulls your mouth to his, breathing into it with every sharp snap of his hips.

“Harder,” You beg, biting at his bottom lip as he groans, using his fingers intertwined into the hair at the nape of your neck now to pull your head back and he pulls his hips back quick, bottoming himself out inside of you so forcefully you feel like your legs might give out, his cock rubbing against your already too sensitive g-spot and continuously finding a way to bring you closer and closer to the edge, “fuck—yes, yes. Joel, oh my god—”

“Yeah,” Joel goads you, his eyes drawn closed as he tries to keep his own orgasm at bay, “give it to me, baby—wanna watch you make a mess on my cock, alright?”

Easy, you laugh airily and feel the instinctive squeeze of your walls around Joel’s cock as he pulls your face to his, foreheads pressed against each other as he angles his hips back and slams into you one last time before you come undone, head falling back in a similar position to how he caught you a few weeks ago, this time for him. 

Your grab for his shoulders suddenly, blunt fingernails digging into his skin and he takes a few harsh breaths through his nose before he’s pulling out, hand grasping his cock as he jerked himself a few seconds before he comes in thick, short spurts against your stomach, squeezing at the head of his cock as he drags it through the mess he’s made.

His expression is nothing short of mesmerizing, mouth hung open just enough that his tongue can drag over his bottom lip before his teeth are taking its place, eyes drawn to your skin.

Wordlessly, he pulls away on his own pair of shaky legs as he reaches for his wrinkled, worn shirt and brings it to your stomach, cleaning up the mess with a faint smile on his face.

“You know, I think it might take me a bit to fix my washer,” You tease, “so—I might be over here bothering you for a while.”

Joel peers up at you, his head still tucked down as he wiped at your stomach.

“Fine with me.”

Then he’s peering over your shoulder, watching as the washer time inched toward zero, dinging behind you. You turn around, letting your leg fall from his hip finally, ass brush against him in the process and Joel can’t help the way his eyes refuse to leave the sight of it.

Only feeling slightly guilty when you catch him this time, not giving him the pass you usually do.

“We’ve still got about an hour left if I dry them here,” You tell him, “anything else you wanna prove?”

Joel’s tongue pokes at the inside of his cheek, eyes dragging up toward the upper level of his house before flicking back toward you, a smile plastered on your face.

“I can think of a few things.”

divider creds: @/cafekitsune

[honeyedmiller]

The Gift | Javier Peña

pairing: husband!javi x wife!reader

warnings: marriage, mentions of pregnancy (reader is pregnant!!!), reader described to be shorter than javi, mentions of the holidays (specifically christmas), mentions of starting a family, tooth-rotting sickeningly sweet fluff, brief mentions of a deceased family member, tiny uses of spanish with translations at the very end, no use of y/n. if any content warnings may not be suitable for you to consume, please do not read forward. 18+, minors dni.

word count: 3.4k

synopsis: you and javi do your yearly gift exchange with each other. your gift to him just so happens to be life-changing.

this is *technically* a part two to when you wish on a shooting star, but it can be read as a stand alone.

tysm to my bby @ilovepedro for beta reading this for me. you’re amazing ily ♥️

divider by @ dvluc

The bright streams of golden sunlight shining into your bedroom is what woke you up for the second time that morning. You let the warmth of the rays soak into your skin, knowing it was a chilly December day outside of the four walls of your shared home. 

The first thing that woke you up was your loving husband kissing you on your forehead and telling you he loved you before he went to work that morning. You’d been feeling extra sleepy lately, so he didn’t want to disturb you by fully waking you up. 

Your body just felt so exhausted, and you woke up with short waves of nausea in the recent mornings. You just painted it as stress from your own job, not thinking much of it. 

You groaned as you stretched, dreading getting out of your warm bed where the scent of your beloved husband engulfed the entirety of your body. You missed his presence already, wishing the warmth of his chest was pressed against yours as he peppered soft kisses all around your face. You found your mind swirling with longing for him, but you couldn’t get too distracted. 

You decided it was time to get up and straighten up the house since you had the day off. Next week was Christmas, and you and Javi held your annual Christmas party at your house every year, so you wanted to make sure the house was pristine for the guests you were to have over. 

After you brushed your teeth and washed your face, you made the bed and trudged downstairs, yawning as you reached the kitchen. Caffeine sounded heavenly right now, considering Javi kept you up most of the night. 

You made a fresh pot of coffee to brew, leaning against the kitchen island counter as your eyes roamed your kitchen. Your eyes landed on the pastel yellow sticky note stuck to your fridge, immediately recognizing Javi’s handwriting. You took the sticky note off of the fridge, eyes scanning over what he scribbled. 

Good morning, mi amor. Don’t forget we have our annual gift exchange tonight. Can’t wait to give you your gift, bebita. I also left you some chorizo and eggs in the fridge for you. Te amo para siempre.

-J

You grinned down at the endearing note and opened the fridge, and as promised, there was a small container with one of your favorite, simple breakfasts. You took the container out of the fridge and a pan from the cabinet, scooping the contents out of the container and onto the pan with a wooden spoon, turning on the flame to the stove to heat the food up. It looked mouth wateringly delicious at first, but when the smell of the food invaded the kitchen, you suddenly felt so nauseous. 

It was odd, because you usually loved the smell of the meal. You turned off the heat and abandoned the kitchen altogether after putting the food and coffee away, shaking your head as you made your way back upstairs. You sighed as you sat down on the bed, grimacing as the nausea slowly dissipated. 

Maybe breakfast wasn’t the best idea today. You got up again to officially get ready for the day, needing to stop at the store to get some items for your Christmas party before you came back home to tidy up. Luckily you and Javi kept your house neat, so cleaning wasn’t going to be a super tedious task.

You made a list of things you needed at the store and made the short drive over, checking off all of the things on your list. You passed the feminine products section, halting when you realized you needed to pick up some more pads. You spotted the pregnancy tests right next to the pads, and your mind reeled for a second. 

When was the last time you got your period?

You’d been so wrapped up in life recently and busy with work and preparations for the Christmas party that you hadn’t even realized your period never came this month. Again, you could’ve written it off as stress, but a tiny pit in your stomach was telling you to get a pregnancy test. You and Javi had been trying for a baby after you made an agreement at your little getaway trip for your third wedding anniversary in Lake Arrowhead. 

Now that you were both back in Laredo, reality broke the bubble of pure bliss you two were wrapped in. It was back to work, back to responsibilities, back to the mundane daily life—one that you absolutely adored getting to live with Javi. Nonetheless, time slipped away from you and you’d completely missed the fact that your period was late by nearly a whole month. 

You grabbed three pregnancy tests just to be extra sure of whatever outcome you’d receive. Your mind swirled with thoughts of the possibility that you were carrying your first child, but you didn’t allow yourself to delve too deep into those thoughts just yet. As you made your way to the checkout stand, you happened to pass the baby clothing section, spotting a pastel yellow newborn onesie that said “abuelo’s amorcito” in white lettering. 

You smiled and instantly thought of Chucho and how happy he’d be hearing the news that he was to expect his first grandbaby. You grabbed the onesie, possibly getting a little too ahead of yourself, but you’d save it and give it to him when the time came. 

Your heart fluttered as you made your way home after checking out all of your items, realizing that it was already two in the afternoon. Javi got home around four, so you had to hunker down when you got home to clean. You finished cleaning the backhouse you and Javi lived in in record time, moving to the living room of the main house to tidy up a bit. You still had about thirty more minutes to spare, so you took your tests to the bathroom with you. Once you were finished, you laid the tests down on the counter and washed your hands, sitting at the edge of the tub in anticipation. 

The five minutes you had to wait for the results to show up had to be some of the longest minutes of your life, face buried in your hands as your knee bounced up and down. Your breath was shaky as nerves took over you, the five minutes nearing an end. You stood up from the edge of the tub and made your way to the double vanity, squeezing your eyes shut while inhaling a deep breath. 

Now or never.

Your eyes shot open, only to be met with six pink lines meeting your gaze. Every single test was positive. You exhaled a shaky breath, a small sob bubbling within your throat as your hand covered your mouth. 

You couldn’t wait to tell Javi. 

You’d originally gotten him a nice watch that he had his eye on for a couple of months for the gift exchange knowing he’d never splurge on himself like that. He insisted that he splurged on you, though, to which you always argued ‘if you can do it, I can do it for you, too.’

You decided to save the watch for Christmas though, seeing as giving him a gift like this was far more heartwarming. Your eyes teared up at the thought of how great of a father Javi would be. You wrapped one pregnancy test delicately into a small box, wrapping paper covered in snowmen adorning the box. You wrapped the onesie for Chucho next, carefully writing on both boxes who the gifts were for. 

You hid the other two tests, making your way downstairs with the boxes in your hands. You set them both under the Christmas tree, wiping away a stray tear that had rolled down your cheek. 

“Mi amor, I’m home!” You heard Javi call out from the front door of your home, and you couldn’t help the smile that instantly appeared upon hearing his voice. 

You walked to the entryway of your home, seeing your husband set down his work bag onto the floor. 

“Well if it isn’t my handsome husband.” You say as you approach him, stopping in front of him to gaze up into his beautiful brown eyes. He instinctively wrapped his hand around your waist, pulling you into him so you were flush against his body. He smiles down at you, cupping your cheek. 

“If it isn’t my beautiful wife.” He counters back. Your hands travel up to his broad chest, running over the lapels of his beige suit he was wearing. 

“I missed you, mi amor.” You coo softly, one hand cupping the nape of his neck. 

“Yeah? I missed you too, baby.” His smile never wavers from his face as your free hand wraps around the dark plaid tie he wore, gently tugging on it to make him bend down. Your lips easily met his in one swift movement, and he groaned softly into the kiss. His hands slid down to your ass, grabbing it playfully before lightly tapping it and pulling apart from you. 

“Let me change out of my work clothes and then we can do the exchange, cariño. Papá made pozole for tonight.” 

“Sounds delicious. Meet you on the couch.” You huff a laugh, giving him a quick kiss before he makes his way upstairs to change. You make your way over to the couch, grabbing the smaller present that you’d tucked under the tree earlier along the way. You plopped down, nerves overtaking your body. You weren’t sure what his initial reaction would be, albeit you were sure it would presumably be a positive one. 

You heard his heavy steps descending the stairs, and his face lit up when he saw you sitting on the couch. He carried a small box in his hands, a boyish grin on his face as he made his way to the couch to plop himself down next to you. 

“You wanna go first, or should I?” He asks, hand resting on your thigh. The gift exchange you two did was a tradition you both started for yourselves the first Christmas you were together. You’d been doing it ever since, small heartfelt gifts to be exchanged between you both. Javi called it “the pregame to Christmas.” 

“You go first, amor.” You grin, heart leaping in your throat as you try to control your breathing and emotions overall. 

“Here you are, corazón. I hope you like it.” He hands you the small box and you grin at him, carefully tearing the wrapping. You uncover the contents in the box, revealing a silver charm bracelet with a charm already on it. It was a small inscription saying ‘siempre.’ Tears welled in your eyes as you took it out of the box, the shininess of the silver glinting from the glow of the Christmas tree lights nearby. 

“Javi, mi amor. It’s beautiful.” You cry, tears cascading down your cheeks. 

“You think so cariño?” His voice is soft, hands reaching out to wipe the tears from your face. You nod with a smile, eyes glossy and brows furrowed. 

“It’s perfect. Thank you so much.” You unclasp the bracelet and hold it out to him so he can put it on your wrist. He easily clasps it, the cold metal pressing against your skin. He lifts your hand to his lips, kissing your knuckles softly. 

“Your turn, baby.” Javi encouraged, and you cried even more as you shakily handed him your gift. You held your breath as he tore open the wrapping paper, opening the box to reveal the test. His movements completely halted as his eyes scanned over the contents in the box. 

His eyes snapped up to yours, glossy with tears threatening to spill over. You’d only ever seen Javi cry less than a handful of times since you two have been together, so seeing him so emotional made you sob. 

“Is this real?” He whispers, eyes moving back down to the test. 

You nod your head, both of your hands gently grabbing the sides of his beautiful face. 

“One hundred percent real, mi amor. We’re gonna have a baby.” You try your best to contain your sobs, but it’s useless at this point when your own husband is crying with you. He leans over to you, laying you down on the couch as he wraps his arms around your frame and just holds you. He nestles his face into the crook of your neck, salty tears skimming the warmth of your skin. 

Your fingers card through his dark, thick locks, holding him close as you kiss his head repeatedly, mumbling how much you love him and can’t wait to have his baby. 

Javi never thought he’d have this life. He never thought he’d be able to meet a nice woman, date, settle down, fall in love, get married; let alone start a family. 

He was a very different man when he’d left Colombia and came back to the states after taking down Escobar and the Cali cartel, so closed off and unwilling to picture or allow this kind of life for himself. The kind of life he deserves—working a good paying job at the Laredo Sheriff’s Office, married to the most gorgeous woman he’s ever laid his eyes on, reunited with his dad, content and fucking happy. 

He never thought he’d see the day, and yet here you were, laying underneath him and allowing him to cry into your neck about you being able to give him the best thing he could’ve ever asked for, which was a family of his own. 

After both of your sobs subsided and tears melted into a salty stiffness on your cheeks, he kissed your neck softly and hovered his face above yours. Your hands cupped his cheeks gently, pulling him down for a long, comforting kiss that said I love you I love you I love you a million times over. 

“We’re having a baby.” He breathed, a genuine smile that made his crow’s feet prominent adorning his face. You nod your head, leaning up to kiss the tip of his nose. 

“We’re having a baby, Javi,” You laugh as he starts to attack your face with an array of kisses, a deep chuckle rumbling in his throat. “I got something for Chucho too to tell him the big news.” You say against his lips, and he sits back up while gently tugging you up with him. 

“Yeah? I’m sure he’ll love whatever it is.” Javi’s heart warmed at the thought of you getting his father a gift as well to tell him that he was going to be a grandpa. 

You stand up from the couch and hold your hands out to Javi, making a grabbing motion to coax him to grab your hands. He does so without hesitation and you pull him up from the couch, hands landing on his chest afterwards. 

You beam up at him, a glint of pure happiness in your eyes as you let your gaze roam over his features. You still don’t know how you got this lucky, thanking the universe every day that an unlikely pair as yourselves met at an H-E-B of all places. 

“Te amo con todo mi corazón,” Javi wrapped his arms around your frame, pulling you into him as he hugged you. “Gracias por darme la vida que siempre quise.” 

Tears sprang to your eyes once more at his endearing words. “I’d go to the ends of the earth for you, Javier Peña. I promise you that.” You kiss him one more time before breaking away, collecting Chucho’s gift from under the tree before you both make your way to the main house. 

The chilly December air nipped at your skin, so you nuzzled closer into Javi’s side as you both walked down the stone path to the main house. For a second, you were worried that the smell of pozole was going to make you nauseous just as the chorizo and eggs did earlier, but you found it to be the complete opposite this time. You were practically salivating, ready to devour the delicious meal your father in law set out to make you three. 

You and Javier stepped into the kitchen, greeted by Chucho stirring the pot of pozole a few times before he saw you both. 

“Ah, mija! Thank you for cleaning the living room today. Haven’t been able to get around to it myself, so I appreciate it.” Chucho grins. 

“It’s not a problem, Chucho. Thank you for making us dinner. It smells delicious.” You say, setting the present down on the dining room table. 

“Not a problem, querida.” 

Javi prompts you and Chucho to sit down at the table as he takes over, grabbing bowls for the three of you. He serves you both before coming behind you to gently grab your shoulders, giving them a squeeze. You grin up at him and clear your throat, catching Chucho’s attention. 

“This is for you, suegro. I hope you like it.” You hand him the gift, and he looks bewildered as he takes it from you and starts to unwrap it. 

“You didn’t need to get me anything, mija–” His words are cut short as he opens the box, seeing the tiny onesie in it. 

“Surprise, Pop.” Javi says, and Chucho looks between his son and you in disbelief. 

“You’re having a baby?” His voice is full of shock, and you can’t help but reach across the table and squeeze one of his hands. 

“You’re gonna be an abuelo, suegro.” 

Chucho looked down at the onesie in his hands with tears pricking his eyes. You never thought you’d see the day that Chucho Peña got teary-eyed. 

“Tu mamá would’ve loved to see the day her baby boy was having a child of his own. One with a sweet, wonderful woman such as yourself, mija.” Chucho looked between you both with a bittersweet smile on his face. 

“I know, Pop. She’s looking down on us all, and I know she can’t wait to see what a wonderful abuelo you’ll be.” Javier moved to his father, giving him a comforting pat on his back. 

“Thank you both for blessing me with the opportunity of becoming a grandfather. I know you two will be the best parents. I love you both so very much.” Chucho put the onesie back in the box, grabbing your hand once more while shaking it. 

“We love you, abuelo Chucho.” 

Dinner was purely full of baby discussion after that, like name ideas you already had, what you think the gender will be, how you’ll want to decorate the nursery, when you’ll schedule a doctor’s appointment, and all things alike. You couldn’t lie, you absolutely adored every minute of it seeing the love of your life and a man who was such a prominent father figure in your life discussing even the most minute details about your child who you already know was so extremely loved. 

That night, you and Javi went to bed with smiles that you couldn’t seem to wipe off your faces. He kissed you and pushed up his oversized t-shirt you were wearing to bed, resting his head gently onto your stomach as he tenderly cooed into your soft flesh. 

“Hey there. It’s your papá. I can’t wait to meet you, pequeño. Your mommy and I love you so much already.” You grinned down at Javi, raking your fingers through his hair as he continued to babble on to your unborn child. You’d nearly fallen asleep at the soft timbre of Javi’s voice reverberating the four walls of your bedroom. Javi pulled down his t-shirt on you and kissed your forehead tenderly, wrapping you in his arms. 

“I love you, my beautiful wife. Thank you for choosing me and loving me the way you do. I can’t wait to become a father to our child.” Javi’s voice was raspy as it dwindled to a near-whisper, and when he got no response from you, he looked down to see you’d completely fallen asleep. 

You looked so peaceful. Javi smiled down at you as he softly kissed your forehead one more time before laying his head next to you, thanking the universe and all the shooting stars in the sky that you gave him the gift of a lifetime. 

-

translations:

te amo para siempre — i love you forever

te amo con todo mi corazón — i love you with all my heart

gracias por darme la vida que siempre quise — thank you for giving me the life i always wanted

suegro — father in law

pequeño — little one

tags: @party-hearses ; @tinygarbage ; @nostalxgic ; @bastardmandennis ; @catchallfangirl ; @lizzie-cakes

please lmk if you’d like to be added / removed from the tag list. 🖤

[popcornforone]

Home Sick

Day Seven of the Seasons of Life Drabble Challenge

A Javi Gutierrez Fan Fic

MASTERLIST

When you get Marshmallows as a prompt I had to go for my sunshine. He is hard to write for winter so I’ve gone a little nostalgic for it.

Synopsis:- Your feeling homesick but Javi has an idea as to what will cheer you up.

Word count:- 420

Warnings:- suggestion of stuff that might go on after the scene, sucking, swearing.

Thanks @fanfictionoverload @lady-bess @berryispunk can’t believe the winter prompts are now over.

“I know what I need to make you” Javi said. You love him & you love living in Majorca with him & your new life, but you are feeling a little home sick missing your life back in the uk. Yes it’s warmer & not raining at the end of winter, but part of you wishes for cozy nights under blankets watching the rain fall outside. “I need to make you a fondue”

“A fondue?” You question.”I’ve not had one in donkeys”

“All the more reason to then, nostalgia” he says & then bounces off into the kitchen. He’d sent his staff home for the day. This is going to be interesting.

“Fuck” About 15mins later you hear swearing coming from kitchen so go & check he’s not set it all on fire. On the counter top as a range of fresh fruits, bananas, strawberry’s, cherry’s, mangos & apples already for you to dip, into the large bowls of melted milk & white chocolate. Javi is trying to hide the chocolate fountain he tried to get working but broke by accident. Your giggle gives your presence away. He turns around startled & blushing.

“Sorry was trying to do the best for my girl”

“This looks amazing Javi” You say sounding upbeat but there’s still a small amount of disappointment.

“What’s wrong baby?” He asks softly.

“Have you got any marshmallows Javi?” you eyes plead, almost as much as his own puppy dog eyes. With that Javi frantically searches the kitchen but eventually finds them. Your face lights up the second you taste the marshmallow in the milk chocolate.

“Heaven” you moan. Javi smiles, his cock twitching in his trousers. Loving that your noise to this is similar to when he starts to pleasure you.

“I like that noise” he states before eating his own, before then feeding you. You delicately suck his fingers clean. “Oooh have I put you in a different mood now?” Javi asks as you let go of his pinky finger with a loud pop.

“Javi, my love, you always have me in that mood” you smirk. You then dip the marshmallow into a mix of white & milk chocolate & then bite one end. Your eyes tel Javi everything he needs to know. He bites the marshmallow as well & soon the sugary & chocolate goodness is all gone, your sticky fingers caress his face as you kiss him, falling for him even more.

“You really are my sunshine on a gloomy day Javi”

[avastrasposts]

A Baker's Dozen - Seven

Twelve Pedro boys, twelve stand alone short stories, all set in the same bakery.

Hello!

Javi P got a lot of attention last week, both his visit to the bakery and for the many Pickled Peña fics he starred in. Thank you so much for all the lovely comments! It really means more than you probably reaslise! It's been a rough week and I feel lucky to have found a great community here and to have found so much fun and enjoyment in writing to keep my mind off things.

This week's Pedro boy is dedicated to my lovely friend @secretelephanttattoo who is not only an amazing writer, but also one of the best people I've meet on Tumblr. Love you ❤

Series Master List

Working in a bakery almost every day means you pick up on people’s habits, whether they come into the shop or not. You know the bookshop owner across the streets always arrives ten minutes late on Tuesdays. The bodega owner next to your bakery always picks up his dry cleaning on Fridays and the dry cleaning lady always throws out her trash on Thursday evening. And you know that the cute guy with a dimpled smile always walks past your shop at about eight forty-five every weekday morning. 

He hasn’t always walked past, it started just a few weeks ago, but now it’s routine. You’d first noticed him when he stumbled over something on the sidewalk, smacking his hand against your window to keep his balance, and making you jump. He’d given you an apologetic smile, that’s how you know he’s got a deep dimple on his left cheek. And a really, really, great smile. 

The next morning you noticed him again as he glanced in through the window and smiled, a quick wave as he hurried down the street. And the same thing the next morning and then it was a routine. Around eight forty-five, between customers, you’d keep glancing over at the window until you see him walk past in his well fitted business suit, always a tie flapping in the breeze. He has a routine with those too you notice; a blue tartan pattern on Mondays, slate gray on Tuesdays, navy blue with white dots on Wednesday and the then tartan one again on Thursdays before he ditches the ties on Fridays. You wouldn’t go as far as saying that seeing him is the highlight of your day, but when one day he doesn’t pass by, you notice. And when the rest of the week passes and he doesn’t show up at all, you feel a little bit sad, even though you never even spoke with him. 

Monday morning, eight thirty, and you’re working your way through the morning rush, serving coffee and selling croissants and cinnamon rolls, he suddenly appears again. But this time he’s in front of your counter, holding on to a credit card as he smiles down at you. 

“Hi,” he says, the dimple deep in his cheek, “I thought it was about time I stopped by and said hello properly.” 

“Hi,” you say, a little breathless, he’s even cuter, and handsome, up close, and you’re suddenly very aware of your shiny face, straggly hair and stained apron. 

“I’m Marcus, Marcus Pike,” he says, holding out his hand, “I’m the creepy guy who slams into your window and never comes inside.” 

“Hi Marcus,” you reply, taking his hand, hoping yours isn’t too sweaty and clammy, “I’m the creepy baker who stares at you every morning.” 

He laughs at that, a warm sound that makes your spine tingle as his eyes crinkle at the corners, a wide smile making another dimple pop on his cheek. 

“I guess we need to be less creepy then,” he chuckles, “maybe I can start by buying a coffee like a normal customer?” 

“That sounds like a good start,” you smile back at him, “what would you like?” 

“A cappuccino, please,” he glances up at the coffee menu behind you. 

“Coming right up, anything else?” You motion at the fresh croissants and pain au chocolat piled up on the counter and he looks at them with longing. 

“I would love too, really…but my job, we’ve got this fitness test thing in a few weeks and I’ve got to be in shape for that. That’s why I started walking to work, instead of taking the metro.” 

“Come back when the test is done then, if you pass, it’ll be on the house,” you wink at him over your shoulder as you start preparing his cappuccino. 

“Now there’s the motivation I need,” Marcus laughs, stepping back and glancing over the selection inside the display cases, “But you don’t have my favorite I think.” 

“No? What’s your favorite then?” you ask, “No, wait, don’t tell me, let me guess.” 

“Ok,” Marucs smiles as you hand him the cappuccino in a takeaway cup,” what’s my favorite?” 

You look him up and down, and he grins and takes a step back so that you can see all of him, holding out his arms and giving you a little spin. 

“Hmm…business suit, always a tie, well polished shoes and a job that requires fitness tests…” you hum, enjoying the chance he’s given you at properly taking him in. His suit stretches almost  tight over his broad shoulders, hugging his biceps, and when he holds out his arms, the shirt underneath hangs on for dear life. The suit jacket lifts up over his butt as he turns and you’re given the privilege of eyeing it for the first time. It’s just as cute as the rest of him and you have to mentally chastise yourself for ogling. 

“What’s your guess?” he smiles, coming to a stop in front of you again. 

“Carrot cake, but you wipe off the frosting to stay healthy,” you say and he manages to look both cute, amused and offended at the same time. 

“No way, I would never sacrifice the frosting!” he says, pretending to be insulted as he grins, “but nice try, I really like carrot cake, but it’s not my favorite.” 

“Hmm…maybe-”

“No,” he interrupts you with a wave of his hand, “you get only one guess per day, you can guess again tomorrow.” He gives you a warm smile and as he taps his credit card to pay for the coffee.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, keep guessing,” he says, stepping aside to let the man who’s just stepped into the shop approach the counter. With a final wave he disappears out through the door. 

The next morning he turns up again, as the morning rush dies down, and orders another cappuccino. 

“Canéles,” you say, pointing at him. “Fancy, French, just the thing a guy in a smart, well tailored suit would like.” 

Marcus grins and shakes his head, “I don’t even know what they are, but keep guessing!”

“Give me more clues then!” you protest as he takes a sip of the coffee you just handed him. 

“Hmm…I used to play bass in a band in college,” he says and you raise your eyebrows. He does not look like a bass player, or any kind of band member for that matter. 

“Special brownies?” you ask with a wink and Marcus almost spits out his coffee. 

“Definitely not,” he splutters, chuckling as he wipes his chin, “and you only get one guess per day.” 

“Says who?” you ask, but you already know the answer, Marcus’s grin tells you. 

“I do, my game, my rules,” he gives you a wink and heads for the door, “see you tomorrow!” 

Wednesday he comes in a little bit earlier and hands you a travel mug. 

“This looks brand new,” you say and he nods. 

“Decided I should save on the environment, and your takeaway mugs,” he smiles, leaning on the counter while you start preparing his coffee, “What’s your guess today then?” 

“Cinnabons,” you say, glancing over your shoulder, feeling butterflies erupt in your belly when his face splits into a wide grin. But he shakes his head and you give him a mock scowl. 

“You’re impossible to guess!” 

“Keep trying, gives me a reason to come in every morning,” he replies, “Not that I need a reason though,” he adds, a pink flush suddenly creeping up from beneath his shirt collar as he gives you an uncharacteristically shy smile. 

“I’ll keep trying if you promise to keep coming in,” you smile back at him, you can feel heat creeping up your own cheeks as you hand him his travel mug. And of course his fingers touch yours, just a light brush, but enough for both of you to glance down at your hands. You jump a little as his breath catches and when you look up at him again, his lips are parted and you see the tip of his tongue peak out, just for a split second, before he composes himself. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow then,” he smiles, “thanks for the coffee again.” 

Thursday he’s a little bit late, and he hurries through the door with his tie hanging around his neck, untied. 

“Sorry, I worked late last night and slept through my alarm this morning,” he huffs as he reaches the counter. 

“You don’t have to apologize to me,” you smile, “I only sell you your coffee,” you hand him the cappuccino you’ve already made him and he gives you a grateful look, “and let me fix your tie while you caffeinate yourself.” 

“Thanks, you’re a lifesaver,” he sighs and takes a long sip of the coffee as you walk around the counter and stand in front of him. You look up at him, taking hold of each end of his tie, and you suddenly realize you’ve never been this close to him before. There’s always been a counter between the two of you. Now he’s standing barely a foot away and you can smell his aftershave, warm and woody, as you adjust the tie. 

“Over…under…over again…” you mumble to yourself, trying to remember what your dad taught you, “up through the neck and down…there, got it,” you say, gently tightening the tie up against the collar as Marcus lifts his chin up, “but you might want to adjust it.” 

“No, it feels perfect,” he says, giving you a warm smile, “thank you.” 

“You’re welcome,” you smile back at him, tilting your head up a little to be able to meet his eyes now that he’s standing so close. You should really move back but he smells good and his eyes are so soft looking, the way he just smiles at you. 

“What’s your guess?” he asks, smoothing his hand down over his tie as you drop yours to the side. 

“What?” you mumble, slightly distracted by how his throat bobs just over the knot in the tie where your hands just where. 

“What’s your guess for my favorite baked thing?” Marcus says again and you blink, catching on. 

“Oh, of course! Uhmm…brownies? But real brownies, gooey in the middle and crunchy corners?” 

“Oh….that is definitely high up on my list, but not my absolute favorite, you’re getting close though,” he grins at you, putting down his coffee mug on the counter. 

“I’ve got to run, but….are you free tomorrow, after work?” he asks, his eyebrows knotting together as he waits for your answer. 

“Yeah, I’m free,” you say, you can’t stop the smile breaking out on your face at the question and he smiles back at you. 

“If you want, I’d really like to have dinner with you, maybe we can both drink something this time?” 

“That sounds nice, I’d like that, Marcus,” you reply, butterflies multiplying in your belly as he gently puts his hand on your arm, “and I’ll definitely figure out what your favorite is by then.” 

“It’s a date then,” he grins, “you supply my favorite and I’ll sort the rest, I’ll come by at closing, ok?” 

You nod and before you know it, he’s leaned in and pressed a soft kiss on your cheek, “I’ll see you tomorrow evening.” 

Friday morning Marcus stops by and buys his, by now, regular coffee, “So what’s my favorite?” he asks with a cheeky grin and you stick your tongue out at him. 

“Not telling you,” you smirk at him, “I’ll serve it tonight, I’m pretty sure I’ve got it figured out now.”

“I can’t wait,” he chuckles, winking at you before he grabs his travel mug and hurries off to work. 

Your day drags on and your nerves tingle every time you glance up at the clock at the wall. When the shop quietens down after lunch you prepare what you hope is Marcus’s favorite dessert, putting it in the fridge for baking later. 

Just a few minutes before the clock hits closing time you hear the jingle of the doorbell and look up to see Marcus step through it. He’s changed out of his usual business suit and is wearing a leather jacket over a gray t-shirt and jeans, a bright smile as he gives you a wave. You ring up your final customer, bidding them a nice weekend as Marcus lingers to the side, and then you get a chance to say hello to him as you go to lock the door and flip the sign. 

“Hi Marcus,” you smile at him as he steps forward.

“Hi,” he says, leaning down and brushing his lips against your cheek, leaving the spot tingling and your skin warm. When he straightens up he smiles at you, his eyes soft and crinkling at the corners, “I hope you don’t mind, but I have a slightly unusual plan,” he says, pointing to the duffel bag he’s got hanging from his shoulder, “Dinner’s on me, but in your kitchen.” 

“You’re cooking for me?” you ask and he nods. 

“Seems only fair, you’re making dessert, so I do the rest….well…” he gives a little embarrassed shrug, “with a little bit of help from my favorite restaurant.” 

“Sounds like a nice plan,” you say, putting your hand on his arm and his smile brightens again, “come, let me show you the kitchen then.” 

You lead him past the counter and into the back room, the kitchen clean and ready for tomorrow, except the dessert for Marcus. “What do you need?” you ask, “Help yourself to anything.” 

“First of all, I need you to sit down,” he says with a smile, looking around the kitchen for a chair and spotting only the stool with wheels on, “Not many places to sit in here, huh?” 

“When would I have time to just sit around?,” you laugh, taking your apron off and throwing it in the dirty laundry basket in the back room, “I usually just sit on the counter.” You heave yourself up onto the large workbench as Marcus starts unpacking his duffel bag. He’s hung his jacket on the hook by the door and now he’s crouched down, digging through the content at his feet. The gray t-shirt hugs his shoulders, stretching tight over his back and riding up, exposing a strip of bare skin just above his jeans. It’s so far from the man in the well fitted business suits you’ve been seeing every morning for the past few weeks, a much more relaxed Marcus. 

“Do you wear the suits every day because your job requires you too?” you ask, taking the opportunity to stretch your tired back as you get settled on the counter, baking all day takes a toll on your body. 

“Yeah, I don’t mind them but I prefer the days when I don’t have to wear them,” he answers, standing up and placing a stack of boxes next to you on the counter. “No peeking,” he says in a stern voice, smirking at you and you hold up your hands. 

“I’m not touching anything,” you reply, “But I never asked what you work with?” 

“I work at the FBI, with art theft,” he says and you widen your eyes. 

“Don’t tell me you’re an FBI agent?”

“Yeah,” he furrows his brow as he looks over at you, “do you..is- is that a problem?” 

“No, no, not at all, I’ve just never met an FBI agent. It makes being a baker seem very tame is all.” 

“Maybe tame is good sometimes,” he chuckles and looks around the kitchen and his brow furrows again, “Hhmm…hang on, I’ll be right back,” he says, grabbing the bag and going out into the shop again, “No peeking!”. 

“What are you doing?” you call out to him as you hear tables and chairs being moved around. 

“Nothing, just setting things up, just wait there,” he calls back and a few minutes later he comes back to the kitchen. 

“Now, let’s get dinner ready,” he smiles, “Plates and a small saucepan?” 

You direct him to them and soon he’s arranging food on two smaller plates. 

“Miss,” he says, winking at you and holding out his arm, “Let me show you to your table.” 

“How nice, please lead the way,” you smile at him and slip off the counter, taking his arm. He brings you out into the café part of the bakery and leads you to one of the small round tables by the window. He’s put a white table cloth on it and set two candles in the middle, another few candles arranged around the shop. The sun is setting outside and in the dim light of the shop the candles spread a golden glow, giving it an atmosphere you’ve never seen before. 

“Marcus…this is lovely, I’ve never had my shop look so nice before,” you say, sitting down as he pulls out the chair for you, “It’s so…romantic,” you let it slip out without thinking but Marcus puffs up a little and beams down at you.  

“I’m glad you like it, I really like your shop,” he smiles, “and I really like the shop owner, I wanted to make it special for you.”  

“You might be my very favorite customer, Marcus,” you smile back up at him, your cheeks heating up and he grins. 

“First course is coming right up,” he says with a smile and disappears into the kitchen. 

“You should give food walking tours of the city,” you joke as Marcus smiles at you from across the table. “I’m so full but I still want to go and eat at all your favorite places right now.” 

“I’d take them here first,” he says, “and make sure everyone knows where the best bakery in town is, but…” he leans forwards and grins at you, “Speaking of baking, I want to know if you’ve guessed my favorite dessert yet.” 

You give him a soft laugh and mimic his movement, leaning forward to meet him across the table, “I think I might have, I just need to go and turn on the oven and then they’ll be ready in a few minutes. But I just realized, you never said what my reward would be for guessing correctly.” 

Marcus hums, tapping his long fingers on his chin as he looks at you, a mischievous smile making the corner of his mouth curl up. 

“I don’t think we agreed on anything, but if you go turn on the oven and I’ll come up with something good,” he says, his smile widening, making your skin heat up as his eyes seem to suggest something enticing. 

Thank god for your industrial oven, it turns on and heats up to the right temperature in no time. While you pull out the dessert plates and take the ice cream out to soften, it hums to life and pings. The dessert goes in and you set a timer and go back out to Marcus, sitting down at the table again. 

“It just needs a few minutes,” you tell him, “did you come up with a reward?” 

“Yeah, I did, but what if you guess wrong?” he asks, “I need a reward too.” 

“If I’m wrong…” you say, thinking out loud, “you tell me your favorite, and no matter what it is, I’ll make it for you.” 

“That’s a nice idea,” Marcus smiles, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms, the t-shirt stretching tight over his biceps, you swear you can hear a seam ripping behind him, “but I like my idea better.” 

“What’s your idea then?” you ask, giving him a suspicious look, he’s got a very happy grin as he looks at you. 

“If you guess wrong, I can take you on a second date,” he says and you laugh, that’s probably the easiest reward he could’ve asked for and you see the corners of his eyes crinkle as he sees your laughter.

“Hardly a difficult reward, Marcus,” you smile at him and he gives you a warm smile back, “But what if I guess right, what’s my reward then?” 

“If you guess right, you get to take me on a second date,” he grins and you feel little happy bubbles in your chest as his soft eyes stay locked with yours, you can’t help but smile widely back at him. 

“Deal, Marcus,” you say, holding out your hand to him. He leans forward and takes it, his large hand enveloping yours, thick fingers gently closing around yours as you both shake on it. 

“I can smell chocolate,” he grins, glancing at the kitchen, “I think you’re on the right track.” 

“I know you, Marcus,” you laugh, “all serious business suits on the outside, but a wild child on the inside, bass player and all.” 

“Hardly the definition of a ‘wild child’,” Marcus chuckles, “now, if I’d been lead singer or lead guitar, then maybe.” 

“Well, the dessert is only a little bit of a wild child, the defining factor is that at its heart, it’s very romantic, just like you.” 

Marcus gives you a slightly embarrassed smile, “It’s that obvious, huh?” 

“That you’re a romantic? Of course, but I like it,” you smile softly back at him, turning off the timer that’s just gone off, “Moment of truth. Did I guess right or not?” 

“Doesn’t matter, I’m getting a second date either way,” he says, winking at you as you stand up and head to the kitchen. 

Pulling them out of the oven you quickly plate the dessert and scoop up the vanilla ice cream, finishing with a light dusting of cocoa. Your hip bumps open the door to the shop and Marcus watches you eagerly as you bring the plates over and set them down on the table. 

“If this is what I think it is, you’ve got yourself a second date,” he jokes and grins up at you. 

“That’s not helpful, Marcus,” you laugh, “either way, you’ve got yourself a second date.” 

“I know, that’s the beauty of this deal,” he chuckles, picking up his dessert spoon and looking at you expectantly, “Can I guess?” 

“Sure, go ahead,” you smile and he pokes the dessert lightly. 

“Chocolate fondant?” he asks, looking up at you, raising his eyebrows, before he digs the spoon in and cuts it open. The soft chocolate cake exterior gives way to a thick river of chocolate that pours out of the interior of the little cake. Marcus giggles and scoops up a bite of both cake and sauce and puts the spoon in his mouth, humming at the flavor and closing his eyes. You watch with pride as he tips his head back and moans, the spoon still in his mouth as he sucks it clean. 

“How did you know?” he asks, a bright smile on his face when he’s finally done with his first bite. 

You shrug and smile back at him, “You’re not a health freak, you didn’t recognise the more complicated French pastry, you like gooey brownies and you’re a romantic. Chocolate fondant seemed like the obvious choice. Decadent, sweet and just the right amount of fancy,” you grin at him. 

You take a spoonful from your own fondant and put it in your mouth, watching the chocolate flow out from the inside, just the right amount of undercooked to keep the inside flowing and warm. The chocolate flavor spreads across your tongue, paired with a hint of vanilla and salt, rich and warm and you let an involuntary moan escape. When you glance up you don’t miss the dark look Marcus gives you, his eyes fixed on your mouth as he takes another spoonful. 

“You really guessed right, I love chocolate fondant, but I’ve never had one this good before,” he says, humming around the big piece in his mouth. “How come you don’t have them in the shop? Actually, don’t have them in the shop, I’d buy them all every week.” 

You giggle at his blissed out face as he takes another big bite, dropping his head into the palm of his hand as he sucks the spoon clean, “It’s like hot chocolate, brownie and chocolate sauce all in one fluffy soft shell of cake.” 

“I’m glad I guessed right, seeing your happy face makes me happy,” you smile at him and the tips of his ears go a pink in the dim light as he clears his throat and chuckles. 

“Coming to your bakery makes me happy,” he smiles, scraping the last bit of fondant from the plate while he looks up at you, his eyes crinkling at the corners and it’s your time to feel the heat rise in your face, his grin widens as he sees you shift awkwardly in your chair and glance at him with a smile.  

“Really, getting my morning coffee has become the highlight of my day,” Marcus says, “How sad isn’t that?” 

“Not sad, you coming into the bakery every morning has been the highlight of my day,” you say, finishing off the fondant and putting the spoon down while Marcus watches you with a smile. He suddenly pushes his chair back and stands up, holding his hand out to you. 

“Dance with me,” he says, the warmth of his hand spreading across your palm and down your arm as he pulls you to your feet. 

“There’s no music, Marcus,” you laugh but he just grins and spins you around before catching you in his arms, one around your waist, the other still holding on to your hand as you put your own hand on his shoulder. 

“Who cares about the music,” he says, gently swaying you back and forth while he gives you a soft smile, “it was just a clever ruse to get to hold you.” His hand on the small of your back is lightly stroking the fabric of your shirt and you’re very close to him, pressed up against his chest as he holds you near, moving slowly in a circle. You can smell his aftershave, mixed in with the dark chocolate of the dessert and without thinking, your hand slips into the soft looking curls at the back of his neck. Marcus tilts his head as your fingers play with the silky strands, letting go of your hand and moving it slowly to cup your face, his thumb stroking the soft skin on your cheek as he seems to inhale slightly and dip his head to yours.  

His lips are just as soft as you’ve imagined them, warm, gentle, as he parts them and tastes you. His steady hand holds you close, the curve of his strong nose brushing up against your cheek as he angles his head to better kiss you. You feel your fingers gripping his hair, willing him to press you even closer to him. All of his warm, solid body is pressed up against yours, his hand at the small of your back sliding up to hold you closer to him, your own hand gripping his shoulder, steadying yourself as you feel like melting into his touch.  

He’s still swaying the two of you gently, your lips moving slowly together, tasting the chocolate on each other's tongues. Heat is creeping through your body, wrapping around you, as you feel him tighten his hold on you, his breath skating over your lips as he exhales, a quiet groan leaving his throat. 

“You taste so sweet, even sweeter than the dessert,” he mumbles, his mouth close to yours, “I never want to stop kissing you.” 

You stand on your tiptoes to reach more of him, your hand around his neck, and part your lips for him, letting his tongue lick into your mouth with more fervor. He also tastes sweet and the way he pulls you closer as you steady yourself against his chest makes you moan under his increasingly heated kisses. He’s not swaying you anymore, instead he lets you melt into his body, his arm holding you up, as he bends his head, another groan slipping from him as he feels your tongue slip around his own. 

Marcus’s kisses make you forget the time, where you are, and not until he pulls away with a sigh, do you open your eyes and look up at him. His eyes are dark, filled with lust, and it’s mirrored in the way his body feels against yours, his arousal a clear presence between you. And you can feel your own fill your core with heat, a slow shiver as you touch upon the thought of having him even closer. 

Marcus keeps his eyes locked on you, his warm hand gently stroking your cheek as he seems to take a deep breath, composing himself. Your fingers are still toying with the impossibly soft curls at the back of his neck, letting them slip through your fingers, and you feel like you might drown in his dark brown eyes if he doesn’t release you soon. 

“Is it too soon to ask for a second date tomorrow?” he whispers, his eyes dropping down to your lips again, and then back to your eyes as you shake your head. 

“No, tomorrow sounds like a very good idea,” you mumble, slightly hazy from the way his hands never stop touching you, warming your body and sending shivers to your core. 

“Ok,” he mumbles back, “can I kiss you again?” 

“If you do, we might not get out of here tonight, Marcus,” you smile at him and he chuckles, nodding and pulling back a little. 

“You’re very right, maybe it’s best to save more kisses for tomorrow.” 

“I look forward to them though,” you say, letting your fingers slip from his hair and down over his shoulder, caressing his arm, his wrist, and finally his hand. He takes your hand then, enveloping it in his larger one,  and brings it to his mouth, pressing a soft kiss to it. 

“Tomorrow then,” he smiles. 

Part Eight

@harriedandharassed @inept-the-magnificent @sheepdogchick3  @readingiskeepingmegoing @noisynightmarepoetry @survivingandenduring @vabeachazn @amyispxnk @oberynslady @vabeachazn @amyispxnk @thewiigers

[mandoalorian]

tolerate it [javi peña x gn!reader]

“I made you my temple, my mural, my sky…” 

Warnings: this is not nice, I'm sorry. This is pure, unadulterated angst. Based on the song tolerate it and You’re Losing Me by Miss Swift herself.  Word count: 2000approx. Author’s note: one thing about me is I come back every 6 months, drop a one-shot, and then leave again. Was feeling a bit of seasonal depression today. I don’t enjoy fall as much as the rest of the world, it seems, but here is an autumnal fic to get your spirits going. Masterlist Ko-fi

Fall.

Two take-out cups of piping hot Colombian ground coffee warming up your bare hands, because you thought it was too early for gloves, and the trees standing naked and tall with crusty red leaves blanketing the damp ground beneath your chunky boots. Holding the newspaper in the crook of your elbow, you sigh as you feel rain begin to fall from the grey clouds above. You pick up the pace, striding through the swarms of busy people doing their seasonal shopping, just wanting to get back home dry.

Your wishes weren’t commanded and you stumbled through the front door of your townhouse sopping wet, hair stuck to your face and mascara now three inches down your cheeks. You put the coffee cups on the dining room table along with the newspaper and took off your coat. At some point, Javier came in and sat down at the table. His fingers pinched at the corners of the paper. The pages were ripped and wet and the ink was bleeding into an incoherent smudge on the front page. Javier opened the lid of his coffee and took a sip before immediately scrunching up his face and putting it back on the table. You turned to face your partner, only to be met with his lips curled into a frown and his brows furrowed together in disdain. You looked at him, helpless and apologetic.

“What’s wrong now?” You huffed, searching for answers in his empty brown eyes. You were tired of asking the question.

“It’s cold,” He muttered, his eyes not leaving yours as he awaited an explanation like he was owed it. His words are blunt and sharp but you have no choice other than to take his indiscretions on your shoulder.

But instead, you offered him nothing short of a scoff as you emptied the pools of water from your boots.  The storm outside was loud and persisted with long wails and cries. In silence, you sat next to Javier at the table, and in spite, drank your cold coffee.

After a few moments, you smiled to yourself, wanting to lighten the mood and remembering something that you had seen on television a few days ago. “You know, in California, iced coffee is a thing? Yeah, that’s how they prefer to drink it over there.”

Javier grunted in acknowledgement, leaning back on his chair and folding his arms over his chest.

Your eyes flicked between the oak wood dining table, and the way you had set it so beautifully with your fancy China and centrepiece. The empty vase waiting for a fresh bunch of flowers stood tall and was gleaming after you’d spent a good chunk of your day cleaning and polishing it. A single, pumpkin-scented candle flickered in between you and Javier, your gaze fixated on the dancing ember. Finally, you looked back at Javier, who was taking shallow breaths as he awaited you to pay him attention.

When you fail to do so, it causes a problem. “I have to get to the office,” he announced after a few minutes of silence. 

“But it’s a Saturday,” you replied. Ever since Javier got his big promotion, it meant he could do fewer hours and stop working weekends. He hadn’t gone to the office on a Saturday in nearly two years. Javier stood up and put on his leather jacket, the same one he’d kept from the 70s. He still rocked it, of course, but in this climate, it just wasn’t smart. “You’re going to need something warmer than that jacket, you’ll freeze to death.”

You stood up, your chair scraping against the floor, and went to walk to the bedroom, finding a coat for Javier to wear. You picked one out that you knew he hated. It was long and plaid and not his style at all, too ‘modern’, he called it, but it was the only thing that would stop him from catching a cold. You grabbed a pair of gloves and a scarf and walked back out, following him into the hallway. He waited for you and stood leaning against the door frame, looking at the outside world ahead of him.

Sure enough, the storm had cleared up in a matter of minutes and golden rays of sunlight peeked through the now white clouds. Your heart fell, deflated when Javier refused to wear the coat and the scarf you’d picked out for him. 

“The gloves, at least,” you begged him, your eyes wide and glazed with unshed tears that you didn’t realise you were holding back. The air was thick with flaws and indecisions. Javier felt a pang of guilt in his heart when he read your expression and took the gloves from you, shoving them in his jacket pocket, a silent promise that he might just put them on later if he remembered.

“Will you be home for dinner?” You asked quietly.

“Yeah.”

“Okay,” you nodded. Javier placed a chaste kiss atop your head. “I love you.” You promised him, but the words were lost on him.

“See you later,” he replied, before pulling away and walking over to his truck. 

You’d normally watch him get in and drive away but this time, you shut the door before he even stepped off the patio and sauntered into the living room where you slouched onto the couch, hung your head low and closed your eyes. Darkness. You wondered how long you could keep fighting this. You were so tired of giving your all, only to be met with so little appreciation back. What was once the richest of love had turned cold and empty. You gave him endless empathy and he was killing you. 

Javier pulled up outside of Luna Azul, his favourite bar. He hated this. He didn’t like lying to you, but he just needed to get away. He pulled out a cigarette and rested it between his lips, pushing the front door open and immediately taking a seat at the bar. Lighting the cigarette, he took a deep inhale of the nicotine, letting it sting his throat before exhaling. He loved you, he really did. He didn’t remember a point in time when things shifted, he didn’t understand why things had changed so much. You were still his person, his soulmate, he knew he’d never find anyone else like you, but there was just something missing.

“Hey Javi, why the sad face?” Elza, the barmaid asked, already pouring him a whiskey on the rocks, his usual order. “Did someone die?”

Javier feigned a smile before downing his drink. “Rough day.”

“Ah,” Elza said softly. “Trouble in paradise?”

The words made Javier wince. He gestured for another drink, of which Elza promptly poured him. “I guess.”

“I’m sorry to hear that Javi,” Elza frowned. “You deserve better.”

Javi’s frown deepened. He swirled the whiskey as he processed Elza’s words. He really didn’t believe that he deserved better, Hell,  he barely believed that he deserved you, and you were more than good enough. You were perfect. 

And suddenly, for Javier, it all made sense. He was damaged goods. All those years in the DEA, fighting in a war… that’s what had changed Javier. The years of trauma that he’d never confronted… never got help for. He had hidden his feelings, fought his nightmares and pretended like they didn’t bother him. He’d come this far, he wasn’t scared… he couldn’t be scared, he wasn’t allowed to be scared. He had to be strong, brave, get over it. Javier downed his second whiskey, his skin getting white hot as realization gushed over him. Elza filled his glass up with a third, watching the agent intently.

You weren’t the one who changed, he was, and it took him this long to realise. It was all becoming so clear now, how hard you had been trying and how he hadn’t even said ‘I love you’ in six months. Javier’s stomach was in knots, he didn’t know how or why you’d stayed this long when he had given you nothing in return for your efforts. Impulsively, Javier downed the third whiskey. 

Something had to change. He had to change—get better. He knew now that was the only thing that would fix the relationship he’d been taking for granted. He had to go home and apologise. He had to make things right before it was too late. Javier stubbed out the butt of the cigarette and stood up abruptly, only to be met with ruby-red lips crashing down on his hard. Teeth biting down on Javier’s lower lip, Javier let out a small groan. He hadn’t been kissed in so long. But these weren’t your soft, sweet lips. Javier pulled away, eyes widening when he saw Elza standing in front of him with a smirk.

Javier rubbed at his lips in an attempt to wipe away any traces of infidelity. This is not what he wanted or needed right now. He had to get home and fast. Without sparing a single word to Elza, Javier dived out the door and jumped into his pickup truck.

Grey clouds gathered outside as Javier jogged up the driveway, an indication of another storm. You were cooking when Javier arrived home. You were so surprised to hear the front door open as he’d only been gone for half an hour or so. You’d been thinking hard and decided that if tonight wasn’t any different than previous nights then that would be it. You'd be out the door.  The thought of it was soul-crushing because you wanted to marry this man. But you couldn’t take it anymore. Fighting with all your strength and might only to be ignored.

“Hermosa,” Javier greeted, exasperated and breathless. If your eyes weren’t immediately drawn to the remnants of red lipstick on his lips, you might have noticed his tear-stained cheeks and puffy eyes. He’d been crying all the way home, crying for being so stupid and reckless for all these months, for not taking care of himself, but most importantly, not taking care of you.

Your heart plummeted in your chest and you dropped the wooden spoon that was in your hands. It clattered on the floor, the noise making Javier jump, but you stood there, still and unwavering. Silent tears began to stream down your cheeks and you couldn’t strain your gaze away from your boyfriend who was smelling thick of alcohol and had another woman’s lipstick on his face. That was it.

He had dealt his final blow.

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its been years since I've redone my masterlist so im starting again from scratch. if you see this and want to be added, let me know.

[cherry-holmes]

RIVER - Javier Peña x f!Reader

Glimpse of a life with Javier Peña

Chapter —

MASTERLIST

Summary: Javi took you to his favorite place on earth: heaven.

SERIES MASTERLIST

Pairing: Javier Peña x Female Reader

Word count: +3k

Warnings: Angst with happy ending (sad!Javi) Parent loss. | SMUT. Again, there's a lot of plot before the smut😅P in V sex. Unprotected sex. Rough-ish sex. Fingering. Sex in a public place -ish. Breeding kink. Praise kink. Pregnancy talk.

A/N: Hello, Hola! First of all I want to thank all of you for the support you gave me on my first work! Muchas gracias! I been writing for almost ten years now, but I haven't publish anything since my first fanfic on Wattpad in 2017😅

I hope you like this one as much as the first one!

I repeat, I'm not a native English speaker, but I'm a translator student so I hope I'm doing it well!

If you wanna send me a request, my box is open!

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Several daily high temperature records were broken Tuesday in Texas, including at Houston Hobby Airport, Corpus Christi, Laredo and Del Rio. Laredo hit 115 degrees, marking its 10th consecutive day of record highs...

Indeed, as the reporter mentioned on the radio, those were incredibly hot summer days. The air was dry and the sun was burner, it drain all your energy.

You tried to be helpful at the Peña's Ranch during your work vacations, but the chores felt like torture. Javier and his father used to spend hours under the unforgiving sun, repairing fences, tending to horses, herding cattle, and dealing with clients looking for meat animals. The life of a ranch owner was undeniably tough but prosperous.

Sunday arrived with the thermometer hitting nearly 115 degrees. When you woke up that morning, you anticipated a challenging day ahead. However, Javier woke up with a plan in mind. He mentioned knowing about a river around 22 kilometers from the ranch were he used to spend all summer with his cousins when he was a child. You hadn't explored much of the city since you'd been living there for five months since your return from Colombia. So, you were excited about the idea of discovering your new home state, and most importantly, having a day off to immerse yourself in nature. He was delighted that you had agreed to the plan and suggested that you wear sportswear for hiking and a swimsuit.

You inquired him if his father would join, but he explained that Don Chucho would attend the morning mass and then spend the rest of the day at his brother's house.

"It's just you and me today, mi vida," he promised, his large hands squeezing your hips as he left soft kisses on your shoulders as you prepared containers with cubes of watermelon and mango seasoned with lemon and chile Tajín.

Javier placed a small cooler in the back of his '94 Dodge Ram and filled it with beers, water, the fruits you had prepared, and some tamales you had bought and had leftover from the night before.

You jumped into the passenger seat, and Javi turned on the radio as the truck roared to life. The sound of cumbias tejanas played softly as you admired the view of Laredo's countryside. The wind blew through your hair, and Javi drummed his fingers on the steering wheel syncing with the rhythm of Bobby Pulido's song. You felt his free hand touch yours, and when you looked at him, he took your knuckles and placed a kiss on them. He briefly took his eyes off the road to gaze into yours and said, "You look so beautiful today."

Your cheeks turned red as you laughed shyly, but you couldn't resist teasing him, "Only today?"

He grinned and replied, "You've always been a beauty, chiquita."

Thirty minutes later, Javier parked the truck in an improvised parking lot used by visitors to the river. You grabbed your backpack, which was packed with clean towels and dry underwear, while Javi carried the cooler and his own backpack. As you followed him through the lush vegetation and the cool water of the river, you welcomed the fresh air and the shade of the trees. Families and groups of young friends, some with dogs and others who appeared to have camped there overnight, were scattered about. But you notice that Javi didn't follow the same path as the rest of the visitors.

Curious, you asked Javi, "Where are we going?"

He grinned and replied, "It's a surprise."

You continued hiking uphill, leaving the main river trail further and further behind. However, you could still hear the gentle rush of the river. The air was filled with the fresh aroma of blooming flowers and damp earth. Butterflies fluttered everywhere, and you spotted squirrels and birds with vibrant-colored feathers.

After thirty minutes of hiking, you began to feel very sweaty and tired, especially in your knees due to the rocky path.

"Javi," you called to him, noticing he was climbing effortlessly. "Javi," you called again, a bit more concerned, "Are we lost?"

"Be patient," he responded, sounding a bit agitated but not as much as you were. "You hear that? We're almost there," he encouraged.

You focused on your surroundings, and you could perceive the sound of a waterfall nearby.

You followed him through the large rock formation, and before you knew it, a lagoon fed by a waterfall appeared in front of you. The sun reflected on the surface of the crystal-clear water, making it shimmer. The breeze from the waterfall caressed your face, a soft wind drying your sweat with a gentle, cooling touch, rustling the leaves around you.

The warmth of the sun on your skin and the cool breeze from the river created the perfect atmosphere. It felt like heaven on earth, like an Eden. And the fact that you were there with the person you loved the most made it all feel ethereal.

"You like it?" Javi asked gently in your ear, sending a shiver down your spine as he wrapped his broad arms around your waist and pulled you closer to him.

"Oh my God, Javi, it's so beautiful," you exclaimed, "I love it."

"Nobody will find us here, mi vida," he promised, "People follow the marked path, not all of them explore the surroundings," he explained. "As I told you, it's just you and me. Wanna take a swim?"

"Oh God, yes!" you exclaimed as you placed your backpack under a tree. You were wearing a black swimsuit under your shorts and oversize sports crop top, so you just had to take them off, and you jumped into the water.

The water was so clear that you could see the rocks at the bottom perfectly, and the shimmer of the sun on your skin. You swam to the center of the lagoon, and you heard the distant splash of another body jumping into the water. By the time you surfaced, Javier was already at your side, hugging your body and placing a peck on your lips as you wrapped his torso with your legs. You combed his hair disheveled by the water, running your fingers through his black hair. Then, you caressed his face, passing your thumbs on his mustache and bottom lip. He closed his eyes, absorbing your gentle petting. Your fingers wandered through the freckles painting his broad chest and shoulders. You cupped his face with your hands and kissed him with the perfect combination of tenderness and passion that you knew drove him completely dumb for you.

When he opened his big brown puppy eyes, he looked at you as if you were everything he had ever known.

"Te amo mucho, flaquita," he expressed tenderly.

"Yo también te amo, mi corazón," you promised.

"Are you hungry?" he asked after a couple of minutes of tender kisses and sweet nothings in the water.

"Very much," you laughed and started swimming to the shore.

Javi placed a towel on a rock near the water, and you both sat down to start eating and drinking what you brought. You even fed a squirrel with a piece of tamal, which made Javi laugh as he watched you melt in cuteness for the little animal.

"So, you used to come here with your cousins?" you asked him, eager to learn about his youth and his family. He nodded.

"We used to climb to the top of the mountain and swim in the river that everyone knows," he explained. But his expression shifted from a normal nostalgic sentiment to almost sadness in his eyes. He fell silent for a moment, and you regretted asking and potentially ruining the great moment you were having. However, he continued, "After my mom passed away, I was very angry with the whole world. I started being rude with my father and I started to smoke and get drunk with my friends." He let out a laugh, but it was empty. You knew little about how he lost his mother, since he didn't like to talk about it. He had told you that she was sick, that he was fifteen at the time, and that his father never married again. "One day I had a big argument with my dad. He was very angry because I failed all my exams, so I ran away and came here to the river. I was so angry and lost in thought that I didn't notice I had taken the wrong trail and got lost. So, I kept walking until I found this place."

He looked at the waterfall and the treetops, and you felt a shiver and a lump in your throat.

"I sat on this very rock and cried my eyes out, thinking about how much I missed my mom and that I was ashamed of my behavior towards my father," he added. "This place became my refuge. I used to come here every time I felt anxious, tired, or sad. I never told or brought anybody to this place, not even my father."

You couldn't help but wonder if he had ever brought Lorraine here. After all, she had been his first fiancée, and you wondered if he had considered sharing this secret place with her. However, you didn't dare to ask him, afraid of his response or of making him lie just to please you.

But he knew you so damn well, almost as if he could hear the unspoken question burning in your mind. He loved your low-key jealousy.

"Not even her," he clarified. His hand took yours and caressed your still-wet fingers, then he placed his big brown eyes on yours, so devoted to you. "The very first moment I saw you, I swear that you reminded me of this place. I don't know if it was the heat of the Colombian summer or the blue dress you wore that day, but seeing you seated at your desk brought me a peace I haven't felt in a long time."

You felt tears of happiness gathering in your eyes, butterflies in your stomach, and your cheeks turning cherry red. Javi moved closer to you, wrapping an arm around your waist, his intense gaze still on your bright eyes.

"In that moment, I told myself that I have to bring you here, as my wife. Today is the first time I came back in seven years since I left for Colombia. And you are the only person I've ever shown my most precious secret."

Your hands reached for his face, making him stay still as you kissed him deeply and passionately. His hands went to your back, pulling you closer and kissing you back. You tasted the saltiness of your tears in between the kiss, but so did Javi, so he wiped them away with his thumb.

"I promised to you to be worthy of you, baby, and I intend to make it last forever," he promised.

"You have my heart, Javi," you promised back. "You're everything I have."

He leaned in to kiss your lips again, and then he stood up, pulling you up too.

"Enough of crying, babygirl. Let's swim," he said as he stepped into the water, but you let go of his hand, making him frown.

"Wait," you said, looking around, "Are you sure nobody knows about this lagoon?"

"I'm damn sure, baby. What's the matter?" he said, a bit confused, until he saw you taking off your swimsuit. His eyes darkened as they roamed your completely naked body, and you noticed his Adam's apple moving up and down.

"Is it okay?" you asked him, a mix of innocence and naughtiness that made his cock throb inside his shorts.

"You're amazing," he said as he started taking off his own swimsuit and then pulled you to him and into the water.

He kissed your lips, your cheeks, your chest, and you felt his cock half-hardened against your lower belly. But he let you go, and instead of diving straight into sexual matters, you both swam all around the lagoon, drank all the beers, bathed under the stream of the waterfall, and explored the depths searching for weird-shaped rocks. Sex was an amazing experience in your relationship. You both enjoyed each other's bodies and could spend hours tangled in your shared bed, on the couch, or in any other intimate place. The two of you also knew that there were many ways to make love, and not all of them were about sex. This was one of the connections that Javier learned from being with you. He adored your naked body, and it turned him on. There were days when he just couldn't keep his hands off you. However, he also learned to appreciate it in a way that went beyond lustful desires, reaching a level of intimacy that felt almost divine. He saw you through your nakedness, connecting with your soul, and vice versa.

But when you do fuck, you mean it.

The sun was starting to dip lower in the sky, casting a warm, golden glow over the lagoon. You felt his bare body behind you, his arms around your torso as he kissed your neck. You began to rub your buttcheeks against his cock, making him hiss.

Javi's hands disappeared under the water, looking for your core. His index and middle finger found your clit and began to traced gentle circles as he squeezed one of your breasts with his free hand.

You let out a couple of soft moans, trying to keep as quiet as possible, but Javi fastened his touch, making it so hard for you.

"Don't worry, nobody will hear us," he assured you, whispering to your ear, "C'mon, bonita, let me hear you begging for my cock."

"Javi...", you whimpered, feeling his dick slipping on your ass and his fingers between your folds.

"You're such a Goddess," he praised. Javier knew every detail about how to make love to you. He was proud of knowing every corner of your body, every angle, every freckle and every beauty mark over your body. He knew how to made you whimper and scream, and how to make you undone. Yet, he never get bored, not even after three years of relationship and the most wonderful four months of marriage. He would never had enough of every aspect of you.

"I... I need to... feel you inside," you whimpered.

He wanted to made you cum with his fingers and his mouth first, as he always do. But the scene was so kinky and erotic, making his cock throb so painfully.

"Fuck," he hiss, as he carried you, making you gasp, and took you back to the towel.

Javi laid down and you jumped on top of him. His cock was lying on his belly, so you started rubbing it between your wet folds, massaging your clit with his head. His hands captured your hips, so tight you think it would let bruises with the shape of his fingers. But you didn't care, it felt so good.

"I don't brought condoms, baby," he confessed.

"Are you telling me that you planned all this so I let you cum inside of me?", you teased, he shrugged playfully. "You're such a bad boy."

"What are you gonna do about it? Don't tell me that you don't want it too, feel your tight pussy filled with my cum," he whispered, making your core throb around his cock. He grinned, feeling you become even wetter. "I was thinking about starting to build that second bedroom I told you about. How does that sound?"

That was the signal. You and Javi lived in a house that he build years ago. It was at three kilometer from his father's ranch, and since he was not planning to get married at that time, the house only had one room. But now that the panorama had changed, the house was about to transform from a bachelor house to a family home. Starting for make a baby's room next to the the main room.

And just like that, Javi was asking you about starting to try. You answered with a nod and a shaking sigh, your body reacting to his words.

"C'mon, cowgirl, let's put a baby on you," he added, as you took his cock to your entrance. You moan hard as you felt his length stretching your walls, clenching around him. "Fuck, I love that pussy," he groaned.

He was also mesmerized by the view of you on top of him: your skin glowing at the sunlight, drops of water over your shoulders, your wet hair waving with soft air, your hands on his chests, your hardened nipples and your drop-shaped breasts. You looked gorgeous as always.

"You feel so deep, Javi," you moan, starting to moving back and forth, up and down with gentle movements. His pubic hair caressing your swollen clit, his hands over your hips and waist. "I want you to fill my pussy with your cum."

His cock felt different without a condom. You were a married couple, but you still had intercourse with protection, given that you didn't have plans to have a baby until now, and Javi wasn't selfish to make you take pills full of hormones and side effects. He always tried to have condoms on hand, and even though he had insisted that you didn't have to take morning-after pills, you both had sex without protection a couple of times. You always let him know how much you loved his bare cock inside of you and you knew how much he loved it too.

Your whimpers mixed with the sound of the waterfall was music for Javi's ears. He began to push his hips up at the same time as you went down, meeting each other halfway. The air was filled with filthy sounds of wet bodies and moans and whimpers. His name escaped your lips like a prayer, as he watch his cock disappeared inside your dripping cunt.

"I'm comin'... I'm... fuck...," you cried, as you felt a knot buildup on your lower belly.

"I know baby, I can feel your pussy clenching for me," he said. Javi took control of the situation, as you let him fuck you nice and deep, one thumb on your clit and his free arm around your waist to make you stay still. You placed your hands at both sides of his head, so he was able to capture your nipple with his mouth, making you cried and soaking wet.

"Don't you fuckin' stop, Javier! Just like that, me gusta cuando me coges así," you pleaded as he fastened his thrusts.

"Quiero verte corriéndote en mi verga," he commanded.

You reached your climax with a silent scream as the waves of pleasure washed over you, squirting over his cock. You pulled your hips up unconsciously, but he pulled you back down again, buried so deep into you. You felt him almost rubbing your cervix as his warm and thick load painted your walls.

He was also growling and letting out soft whimpers as he watched your pussy dripping a mix of his cum and your honey.

Javi pull out and placed your body beside him, kissing your collarbone and caressing the curves of your waist as you came down from your cloud of bliss.

"That was amazing," you murmured after a minute, your cheeks burning. You cupped his cheeks and kiss him on the lips again.

"I wanna swim again," he said, starting to stood up taking your hand to follow him.

But you pulled him closer, pressing his chest against your breasts as you wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him passionately, your tongues entwining. "You're not going anywhere. I told you that you were a bad boy, and you must be punished for that behavior, mister."

He grinned devilishly as you placed your hands over his shoulders and pushed him down your body.

[sweetly-yours-and-mine]

Summary:  A curling up using B’s legs as a chair seat

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!Reader

Warnings: smutty but no smut, probably too long and rambly, idiots in love but one of them is emotionally constipated and the other loves them unconditionally

Word Count: 2.0k

Javier grins when he sees you in the kitchen, murmurs some sweet pet name that always makes your face go all hot no matter how much he says it. He comes up behind you and wraps his arms around your waist. 

“Javi, you’re all sweaty,” you protest against him, stirring something on the stove and tapping the wooden spoon against the side of the pan before setting it aside. 

There’s the sizzle and pop of hot oil, to him, it sounds like life. The fume hood fan is on, your forehead is a little dewy with sweat. 

Sometimes he thinks you’re only a mirage, that he’s drunk himself into a coma and he’s being tempted with what he could have had if he was better. You do have a larger-than-life quality around you that he can’t ignore. Light sometimes reflects off you in ways that it shouldn’t, in ways that don’t make sense.

If you are a mirage, he’s not letting you go. He presses his face into the crook of your neck and unashamedly smells you, the raw smell of skin and your shampoo and cilantro. 

There’s a leaf of it on your skin and with a chuckle he takes it off and puts it in his mouth, chewing on it lazily for a moment before he bites your neck and makes you protest again, “Ay, Javi!” You push him away, “You’re hot!” 

With a sigh he lets go of you, lets his fingers linger against your waist and trail up the curve of your spine until he reaches the spot he bit. He soothes it over, “Sorry.” 

“Don’t you wanna wash up?” your voice is softer now, his touch telling you something he doesn’t know himself. “Food’ll be ready soon, I made your father’s favourite, so you’d better be quick if you want anything to last for you.” 

He supposes he should go get clean and stay out of your way. 

Javier likes having you to come home to you. He likes that you don’t mind that your…something still lives with his father, that he polishes off glasses of whiskey as if they were tap water. He likes coming home from the fields, his shirt sticking to him with sweat and taking the back door into the kitchen to see you, to be faced with the hazy smell of rice and spices. 

He likes that you usually arrive at Chucho’s place late afternoon with a basket of groceries in your hands that you use to make them dinner. That you keep the fridge well-stocked and the freezer filled with ice cream. 

He likes seeing you in the kitchen he grew up in, the kitchen his own mother used to cook in and had become a graveyard of sorts since her death, the most of the meals his father would make coming out of a can or a microwave. 

Now, you use fresh and colourful produce, fresh meat and fish and cook up a storm each evening, leaving them ample enough for lunch the next day. Now, you leave a bowl of fruit almost overflowing with fresh oranges that you squeeze for them and bring out on the porch as a silent suggestion instead of Javier’s whiskey each night. 

He likes that you sometimes stay the night as well, and you let him take you to his bed and have sex with you although the Texas heat is anything if relentless, no matter that the sun has hidden itself away for the night. 

He’s not blind. He sees the way the town talks about you, hears it himself when he manages to venture that far, sees the lingering glances on his back, the sudden dip in the conversation when he comes in. 

He imagines it’s worse for you. 

They think you’re wasting your time on him. A cook and a maid that doesn’t get paid. 

It’s a harsh assessment of you, but he knows what it looks like from the outside, and he supposes they aren’t wrong about that. 

And he wants to, he’s tried, over and over again to talk some sense into you. At least hint at it in what he hopes is a subliminal way. But you always cotton on to him quick. You’ve grown up with him, of course he’s a tree standing in an open field to you, the words he’s left unsaid lingering under the surface like seam stitching that you run your finger over with a sharp, assessing eye. 

For now, he tries to content himself with what he’s found with you ever since he’s returned from Cali and you showed up at his porch late one evening and Javier pushed you up against the house and kissed you, trailed his hand into your shorts and made you come for the entire darkness to see, as if it were an act of rebellion. You’ve fallen the both of you into a strange pas-de-deux whose music the neither of you know when is going to stop and, for him at least, hopes that it never does. 

Tries to content himself with what he manages to give you and what you’re giving back to him tenfold and trying to ignore that the seagulls of Laredo seem to think he’s getting more out of this than you are. 

He supposes, on a surface level he is. 

But when he comes back in, freed from the clutch of magnifying glass of a sun that hangs high in the sky and sizzles the skin of his neck until it’s a golden brown, and he sees you standing at the stove, sees the meals you cooked up for him and his father in the matching serving dishes, the table set, a pitcher of orange juice in the fridge and portions already set aside for lunch, he finds that you tug at something inside of him that was bleeding long and hard during all his time he spent running and gunning in Colombia. 

He finds that when he’s faced with the thought of losing you, he doesn’t think of the sex or the food or the fruit you patiently wash and peel the stickers off of. A visceral reaction is ripped out of him instead, his lungs tied together, his heart ripped out of his chest and buried, beating, beside his mother’s grave, the ground moving in time with each lub-dup, lub-dup. 

He finds he can actually go back to the canned beans and the whiskey and his father’s disapproving glare. As long as you stayed in his life and let him take you sometimes to go and see late-night showings of old black-and-white movies at the cinema where it’s just you two and Javier’s free to kiss you as much as he likes. 

All Javier wants to know, that this is your choice. He’s not sure he’ll ever come to truly understand why you do it, but he’s depraved and starving enough to keep you so long as you want to stay yourself. 

His hair already dried, his stomach full, he finds himself lost in thought again, sitting on the porch where this had all started in the first place. 

You were wearing a dress tonight. Some light, airy thing, made out of cotton. Javier thinks you look gorgeous in it, but he always thinks that of everything you wear and you’ve stopped believing him when he tells it to you so now he has to spend each one carefully, pick and choose in hopes of making you see what he sees. 

He wants to selfishly ask you to have sex with him today. He misses the way your skin springs and folds against his touch, the humidity that lies wet on it and makes it easier to grip at your body. 

He wants to lick off the sweat that will grow on your chest, to bite down into your harsh skin just before he draws blood so he can revel in the life of you. 

He decides he’ll only ask it of you if you ask it of him first. 

The front door creaks open and shut, the soft pad of your footsteps follow. 

You run your hand down the side of his head and lift your chin to meet your eyes. Javier thinks you’re about to say something soul-altering from the darkness that lays in your gaze but you only say, “Scooch.” 

With a few short adjustments, you’re in his lap now, your knees to your chest, his arms wrapped around you. When you press your head against his chest and underneath his chin, your hair rubs against his skin. 

There’s his father’s chair that you could have taken instead, but he’s happy you chose his body. 

“Thanks for dinner,” he says quietly. If he squints, he thinks he can see the words hang in front of him like moths, see them fly over to the light above the door and flutter nervously around it.

“Don’t mention it.” 

His hands drift over your body, trail over your thighs and chest and rest at your waist. He tilts your head so he can press his mouth against your neck and kiss your skin. He wants to inhale you like a cigarette. There’s a strange desire that sits in his lower belly that spreads over to his chest and arms. 

“You look really pretty in this dress.” 

From the way you stiffen and relax again it’s clear you don’t believe him and want to call him on his supposed lies. “Thanks.” 

He keeps touching you, running up the side of your waist and cupping your jaw. Javier wants to bite you again but he’s not sure if you’d like that, not after what he did in the kitchen. He holds back a groan as he thinks of you in his bed, of the sheen of sex and lust that will lay on your skin after he’s done with you. 

With a hard press of his eyelids, he pushes the thoughts away from him. 

“They’re showing Casablanca this week.” 

He thinks of you in the low light of the cinema, funny little accents coming in from the screen. He thinks of the glow of your eyes and soft plush of your lips against his own. He’s already decided he’s going to buy you an overpriced bag of popcorn and an even bigger bag of cotton candy that you’ll snack on on the car ride back and feed him some too. 

“Let’s go.” Maybe he’ll press his fingers against your core and make you come, make you stifle your whimpers against his neck. But he also doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable for the ride back and thinks better of it. 

You sit up in his lap and look at him with a soft gaze he doesn’t know what to make of. Your finger finds a path down his lips and you keep your eyes in his like rain and puddles. 

Then you’re kissing him. They’re fireflies of kisses, and patter against his lips, never sitting still long enough to satiate him. You’re riling him up purposefully. 

“Will you fuck me tonight?” Your voice is smoky, the fog weighted and heavier than normal cigarette smoke. 

His fingers brush against your temple and he marvels at the sight of his skin against yours, “Would you like me to fuck you?” You could ask for a mountain and Javier would bring it to you rock-by-rock at your feet. 

“Mmhm,” you hum. It curls around his neck like a snake, “Real good. Hard and deep.” 

Sometimes, he thinks maybe this is all just good sex for you. But sometimes, all the time, there’s something that’s pressed into your skin and eyes that protests against that thought insistently, “I can do that.” 

You smile happily and nudge your nose down the column of his neck, “And will you eat me out? Do that thing with your tongue I like so much?” 

His hands drift down to your ass, and he holds onto it possessively. Inside, he hears his father step away to his room, his good night spilling out from the open window. “Yeah, baby, I can do that too.” 

Thanks for reading, if you liked it, please consider leaving some feedback! I don't usually respond, but I obsess and re-read reblogs and comments constantly.

Masterlist here. Summer Drabbles here.

[drabbles-mc]

For the Record

Javier Peña x GN!Reader

For @pickled-pena's writing challenge!: resolutions, pickle/jar of pickles, "You stand there and accuse me, but where were you at the time?"

Warnings: 18+, language, mentions of injuries, angst/arguments

Word Count: 2.2k

A/N: This was such a fun challenge! Thank you to the mods for putting it together! It's also been a while since I've written for Javi so that was a treat too haha. Happy New Year, y'all! xo

Narcos Taglist: @garbinge @winchestershiresauce @sizzlingcloudmentality @panagiasikelia @616wilsons @hauntedforsst @mirabee @boomclapxox @nessamc @supersanelyromantic @padbrookcottage @mysun-n-stars @raincoffeeandfandoms @justreblogginfics @ashlingnarcos @proceduralpassion @artemiseamoon @narcolini @hausofmamadas @cositapreciosa @il0vebeingdelulu (If you want to be added to any of my taglists, please let me know!)

You were standing in the kitchen, holding the refrigerator door open as you looked inside it for the fifth time since you’d gotten home less than an hour before. No new food had appeared there in that span of time but you still kept coming back to check anyway just in case. You weren’t even actually hungry, although you should’ve been with how hectic the day had been and the fact that it led you to not being able to eat anything since your coffee and half of a pastry on the way to base that morning.

If you had still been back home, you would just be enjoying No Man’s Week—that week between Christmas and New Year’s when not much of anything gets done by anyone even if they have the best intentions. But you weren’t home. So instead of staying home and ditching work completely, or sitting in an office pretending to work but really getting nothing of the sort done, you had been running around the streets of Medellín trying to catch Escobar’s men and trying not to get shot in the process. Much less relaxing.

Along with your day being the opposite of relaxing, you also weren’t successful in either of the things that you had set out to do. The information that you’d been gathering had gotten you pretty far, but not quite far enough. The member of Pablo’s team that you’d been tracking for weeks slipped through your grasp, although it wasn’t without a fight. That much was evident because of the bullet that had gone clean through your bicep, and the other that had buried itself in your tac-vest. It was not a successful day.

Now, on top of your day being unsuccessful, everything else was infinitely more difficult to do when you only had full use of one arm and hand, and of course it wasn’t your dominant one. You should’ve taught yourself to be ambidextrous.

Then, as if all of that wasn’t enough salt rubbed into your very fresh wounds, you were about to make a final decision on what was going to pass for a very sad dinner when the lock flipped on the apartment door. You heard the click and you let out a sigh purely out of reflex as you let go of the fridge door to let it fall shut. Your jaw was clenched tight as you heard the apartment door swing open and quickly slam shut. Dramatic. He was always so dramatic.

“What the fuck was that?” he said as he started to storm into the kitchen.

You turned around to face him, your face as neutral as you could manage it. “Lock the door, Javi,” you instructed, purposely ignoring the question he’d just thrown at you.

He froze for a moment, hesitating. It took a second for him to process what you’d said, realizing that you weren’t giving him the argument that he’d been gearing up for the entire drive back to your place. He obliged, albeit begrudgingly. He was shaking his head the whole time, about two seconds away from stomping his foot like a toddler in the midst of his tantrum.

“Well?” he dove right back into it once the lock was in place.

“Well, what?” you asked, tone even as you turned back around to the fridge to open the door again, this time just to have an excuse not to look at him.

“You know what.” He wasn’t yelling, too exhausted for that, but even with how low his voice was it still held plenty of anger, still sharp enough to feel like it was cutting you. You heard his footsteps behind you even as you kept your eyes glued to the inside of the refrigerator. When he spoke up again you could practically feel his breath against the back of your neck. “You never should’ve been out there alone.”

You refused to turn around and look at him. “Some things can’t wait. You of all fucking people should know that. Plus it’s not like I didn’t try to get you to go with me, but no,” you dragged out that last word to twist the knife a little more. “Only you’re allowed to do that apparently.”

He scoffed. “What’s that supposed—”

“Don’t,” you cut him off, your laugh cruel enough to put you on even footing in the argument. “Don’t insult either of us by finishing that question.”

There was nothing in your fridge that would even come close to constituting a meal. You’d been living on takeout for the last few weeks because of how hectic everything had been. No time to grocery shop and definitely no energy left to cook. But you didn’t want to leave your apartment now that you were home, so you were just going to suffer through by grazing on the scraps that you had. You reached for the nearest jar on the refrigerator door, grabbing it with the one hand you still had full use of.

Javi watched as you side-stepped your way out of being boxed in by him. You moved to the side and set the jar on the counter, and Javi waited a second before he moved right along with you, trapping you between him and the counter now instead of the fridge.

As much as Javi wanted to plead ignorance, he knew exactly what you were talking about. It wasn’t something you brought up often, saving it for times when you needed a good card to play. This was one of those times. He was angry about it but he’d done it to himself in a way—he knew that. He tried to come to his own defense. “That’s not the same. You know that. What I did—”

“Was fucking reckless,” you snapped, slamming the jar down on the counter, not hard enough to break it, but hard enough to make both you and Javi flinch. You tightened your grip on the lid, not even trying to open the damn thing, just trying to channel all of your anger and exhaustion into something that would cause minimal damage. “You can’t stand there and be pissy at me for what I did today when your track record is what it is. It’s not,” you scoffed, “it’s not even fucking close.”

“You got fuckin’ shot!”

You turned around to face him, stanced up like you were ready to fight despite the fact that you were bandaged up and strapped down in a sling, a last-ditch effort from the doctors to try and remind you not to move your arm if you could help it. “And you got Steve fuckin’ kidnapped!”

Javi flinched at the accusation, the truth of it stinging just as much as the rest of it. “It’s not—”

“And, for the record,” you turned back around and set back to work on opening the jar on the counter, “I tried to fucking tell you. You didn’t wanna hear it. You didn’t think that I had anything. So don’t stand there and act like I just up and out of the blue decided to go rogue. I tried to make sure someone had my back and you bailed on me.”

You didn’t touch him. You weren’t even looking at him and yet he found himself taking a step backwards like you’d shoved him with both hands. “Hey.”

“No,” you refused to turn around and look at him, dedicated to the tear that you were about to go on, “no don’t give me that. You feel shitty about it? Good. You should feel shitty. Because it didn’t have to go down like that today. You wanna come in here and yell at me and say that I was acting stupid and reckless and I just—you didn’t leave me any other choice!” You tried and failed to twist the lid on the jar, only adding to the frustration that was stacking endlessly on your shoulders. “You stand there and accuse me of all this shit, but where were you at the time? What else was so promising that you just fucking hung me out to dry?”

“If you knew I couldn’t be there then you should never have gone out on your own.”

“But you could’ve been there! You were supposed to be there!” You wanted to throw your hands up in exasperation and you couldn’t. You turned around to look at him, hating that you could feel the tears in your eyes. “You promised. You can’t just treat your promises to me like, like the bullshit excuses you give our boss. They’re not just some red tape you have to find a way around. You owe me more than that.”

He frowned, the response that he’d been building up in his head evaporating completely the more he listened to you, not just to your words but to the sadness in your voice, the dejection. He never wanted to make you feel like that. Until recently he hadn’t ever been in the position to make someone feel that way—his relationships never unfolded the way that yours had.

He still wasn’t ready to spit out an apology, though.

“I don’t think they’re red tape,” he finally said. He took a deep breath as he reached around you and took the jar off the counter.

“Javi—”

“Let me finish,” he stopped you before you got on another tirade. He easily twisted and popped the lid off the jar you’d been struggling with before setting it back down on the counter. Neither of you commented on it. “I should’ve listened back then. But you didn’t say a damn word to me today once we left here. I had no idea where you were until I heard a call on the radio saying you got fuckin’ shot.”

“Would you have even shown up?”

“How can you ask me that?”

“Because you blew me off once.”

“In a fuckin’ meeting! In a conference room! I would never—” he stopped short, getting himself together. “No one goes out alone like that.” He paused, hurt crossing over his expression for a moment. “I don’t let you go out alone like that.”

If you hadn’t been so exhausted, you would’ve had more angry things to say. More cutting comments to make. But as it stood, you just wanted the day to be over with, wanted the argument to be over with or at least paused. There would be plenty of time tomorrow to keep hashing it out after a decent night’s sleep. You were trying to figure out a way to say all of that when the sound of your stomach growling cut through the tense silence of the apartment.

You sighed, about to cobble together a sentence of some kind when Javi spoke up for you. “Eat. Get some energy to yell at me more later.”

Despite the exhaustion and the stress, you managed a smile. “Tha—”

“That all you’ve had today?” he asked.

“Not really,” you said, your tone markedly different than it had been a few moments before, “but sort of, yeah.”

“I don’t think pickles count as dinner after the day you had.”

“Well,” you reached into the jar with your good hand and carefully pulled one out, “I don’t think that you brought home dinner.” You took a bite of it. “So this is gonna have to do.”

“I can run out and grab something,” he offered, not quite an olive branch but something close.

You appreciated the offer but you still shook your head no. “It’s fine. We’re both home. Let’s just…yeah.”

He knew that he should’ve fought you on it, gone out and gotten something more passable for dinner anyway despite your protest, but he didn’t. Of all the arguments the two of you were bound to get into, he didn’t think it was worth it to make this one of them.

“We gotta get better about cooking,” he said as he stepped over, reaching in and taking a pickle out of the jar.

You let out a tired laugh. “Next year, maybe.”

He chuckled and shook his head. “Thought you didn’t do resolutions?”

“I don’t. But, you know, still sounds good.” You paused for a brief moment. “Yours should be to listen to me more.” There was no real malice behind it, almost like it was a real piece of advice.

He took it as such as he leaned back against the counter beside you, studying your sling, your face, your everything. “You alright?”

It wasn’t funny, per se, but you still had to laugh at the fact that it took you both this long to get to the point in the conversation where he was asking you that. Typically that’s the first thing someone asks when they hear you got shot.

“I will be,” you told him truthfully.

You leaned, letting your head drop against his shoulder. You let out a deep sigh, one that he mirrored soon after. Part of you felt like maybe there was something else that you should be saying, but when you felt the kiss that he pressed to the side of your head, you figured that whatever was left to say could wait until later.

[witchwyfe]

— sharing clothes in a totally friendly way ! i love the roommate predicament so much!!

trp!Jake ‘hangman’ seresin x female reader

Sharing clothes in a totally friendly way.

Thank you so much! I'm glad you love it :)

You and Jake have the same hoodie. A super basic grey longhorns hoodie that you can guarantee at least half of the people at your university own it. However, there are some important differences between the two hoodies. Jake’s is more worn and comfortable than yours, and more importantly; it smells like him. 

The clean scent of mint that somehow always lingers on him, and the soft musk of his cologne, is embedded in the fabric, no matter how many times it runs through the washing machine. 

The first time was an accident. You’d grabbed it from the clean laundry pile one night, thinking it was yours. Now, you’ve lost count of how many times you’ve worn it, and find yourself reaching for it once again, when you’re fresh out of your shower.

His familiar aroma wafts up, wrapping you and your senses in comfort. You make your way to the kitchen, smiling when you realize Jake left coffee in the pot for you, and set a cup out for your drink. 

You’re fixing up your coffee the way you like it, when he comes in from the small laundry area. A disgruntled look is on his face, eyebrows furrowed until he see’s you.

“Morning sweet thing.” He smiles. “D’ya get your coffee?”

“Sure did.” You hold it up as proof. “Thanks for setting it out.”

“Course.” He pauses for a second and scratches the back of his head. “Have you seen my hoodie?”

“Gonna have to be more specific Jake,” You grin, cocking your head slightly. “You have a lot of hoodies.”

“That one.” He says, pointing right at you. You freeze, heart dropping to your stomach until he speaks again. “Well, mine. I know we have the same one.”

“Yeah,” You answer dumbly. “I uh, haven’t seen it. Could you have left it somewhere maybe?”

He sighs. “Probably. I let Javy’s little brother borrow it last week, but I swear he gave it back to me.”

“Maybe I’m wearing yours?” You offer up shyly, feeling guilty, but also not wanting to give yourself away. 

He shakes his head. “It’s fine darlin’. It’s probably just in my room somewhere.”

You nod. He turns to grab his water bottle off of the counter when he spots the familiar stain on the right arm of his hoodie. It’s syrup from when he, Bradley, and Javy went to Waffle House hungover, after their first party as freshmen. Try as he might, he’s never been able to get the stain out. You must not have noticed the stain, because he knows your sweatshirt doesn’t have one.

“Actually, I’m going to wear a different hoodie today.” He tries to hide his smile. “I’ll be right back.”

© witchwyfe 2023. absolutely no reposting, translating, or modifying, even with credit.

[crowandmousewritingco]

Pre-Breakfast Treat

Pairing: sub!Javi Gutierrez x trans!reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Rating: P (for porn)

Author: Mod Crow

Author's Note: It's been one hell of a long day

Masterlist

Warnings: Language, use of pet names (daddy, puppy (in English and Spanish). MDNI 18+

Rolling over, you reach out, throwing your arm over the now empty spot. Peeling your eyes open, you scan the bed, looking for Javi. After scanning your bedroom, you noticed a lack of him around. But then you noticed the smell of coffee and something sweet, a baked good maybe. Then there was a new smell, one that you recognized anywhere, hot chocolate. Smiling softly, you stretched, shaking slightly as a yawn tore through your body. 

Throwing your legs over the edge of the bed, you rub your eyes, sighing softly as you roll your head, in an attempt to pop your neck. When nothing popped, you pushed yourself up off the bed. Heading for the cracked bedroom door, without paying much mind, you snagged a discarded shirt off the floor and slid it on. The familiar scent hitting your nose with a soothing sensation. Walking down the relatively quiet hall, the smell of the breakfast awaiting you, growing stronger, making your stomach growl. 

Once you reached the top of the rather grand stairs, you could faintly hear Javi, softly humming a song you didn’t recognize. Tiptoeing down the stairs, you listened to Javi hum. It wasn’t till you reached the bottom of the steps, that you realized that the humming wasn’t actually humming, Javi was singing softly to himself. Rounding the wall to the kitchen you stop and quietly watch him, the way he sways softly to the song he’s singing to himself.

“Bésame, bésame mucho. Como si fuera esta noche la última vez. Bésame mucho. Que tengo miedo perderte, perderte otra vez.” As Javi came to a stop in his singing, you watched him turn around with two mugs of what looked like hot chocolate. Hearing the soft thud of the mugs being sat down, you smile softly. 

“Well buenos días, to you handsome. What were you singing just now? I don’t think I’ve heard that one before.” Your voice startled him just enough to make him jump slightly. Walking into the kitchen, you look over the small assortment of foods; most of which were fresh fruits. 

“Buenos días. You can’t go around scaring me like that, you’re going para matarme un día de estos amor.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at Javi’s words. Over the five years of knowing each other and two of dating, you had picked up a lot of Spanish from listening, the other bits you learned through learning the language. “That song, my mom used to sing it while she cleaned around nuestra casa. It’s this vieja canción called “Bésame Mucho” by Consuelo Velázquez.” You could see Javi’s crooked smile grow across his face. That simple thing, making you smile as well. 

“I can’t say I’ve heard that one, you’ll have to show it to me sometime Jav.” Your eyes drifted from his, down his bare chest, till they refocused on the tray that he had been putting together. “Oh! Whatcha make?” Your eyes scan over the foods, only two of which you could put a name to. The hot chocolate and the churros. “I thought churros were a snack like dessert food. Were you just craving something sweet?” You look back to Javi’s, a soft smirk growing on your face as you rounded the island counter corner. Standing next to him, you pressed into his slightly taller frame, arms snaking around his waist. 

“You know, if you wanted something sweet, you could have had breakfast in bed.” You look up at him. You could see the confusion wash over his face though it was short lived. You watched as his tanned face grew redder and redder. Pulling away from Javi’s waist, you rested your hands on your hips.

“Aww is mi dulce cachorrito, all flustered?” You teased as you gently grabbed a hold of Javi’s chin, thumb resting just below his lips. 

“I-I wanted to do something agradable para su papi.” The smirk growing more devilish after Javi said that one pet name. 

“What you did is super nice mi cachorrito. So I think a certain puppy deserves a treat.” Sliding your hand up Javi’s jaw, you dip your thumb under his chin, running it gently down his throat. Once your hand came to a stop, fingers resting behind Javi’s ear with your thumb resting on his sideburn, you asked. “What do you think? Should you get a treat?” Without opening his mouth, Javi hummed a ‘yes’ and gently nodded as well. 

“Okay cachorrito, I know just what treat you should get.” Taking your hand from Javi’s face, you drop it, grabbing his hand. Intertwining your fingers together, you gently pulled him behind you to the living room. Once in the living room, you led Javi to the couch where you gently pushed him onto it. Javi obediently fell onto the cushions gazing up at you with curiosity. Standing in front of Javi, you gazed down at him. You reached out to him, raking your fingers through his soft hair.  The attention making Javi hum out happily. 

“What is mi presente papi?” Javi asked, staring up at you with his sweet brown eyes. You could see the hints of excitement evident on his soft features. 

“It’s a little…think of it as a little appetizer.” Retracting your hand from Javi’s hair, you reached for the hem of the shirt. Pulling it off teasingly slow, you sway your hips slightly, humming absentmindedly. Tossing the clothing aside, you reached for the hems of your boxers. Shimming out of the material, you look back to Javi, who was now sitting almost in awe, an evident tent growing his own boxers. 

“Aww does my cachorrito need help with something?” Watching Javi nod eagerly made you reach out and comb your fingers through his hair soothingly. “Okay cachorrito, are you ready for your caramelo?” You keep combing through his hair, stopping at the back of head giving it a soft scratch. 

“Sí, por favor papi.” Javi pleaded softly. You couldn’t help but smirk. You had Javi right where you liked him. Brian in such a state of need that he could no longer coherently translate so he wasn’t even trying. 

“Okay, slide off the couch onto your knees for me.” Maintaining eye contact, you watched as Javi obediently did exactly as you said. “Good boy. Now, let me see that pretty tongue of yours.” From your position you see Javi palming himself through his boxers. Tsking him, you stop your combing at the back of his head, you grip a fist of his hair, causing him to gasp out moan. 

“Puppy…You forgot to ask for permission. I don’t think you deserve your treat anymore.” You watched his hand shoot away from his leaking cock and tuck both hands behind his back.

“¡No! Por favor. I-I’m sorry, please don’t. Seré un buen chico, lo prometo.” Not only could you hear him beg, you could practically see the begging on his face.

“Okay baby, but you’re not allowed to touch yourself. Understood?” You tighten your fingers  on Javi's hair for a moment before loosening your grip. 

“Sí.” You felt Javi nod his head fervently, despite the hold you had on it.

“Okay, but there is no second chance after this baby. If it happens again then you know what your punishment is.” You felt him nod again, this time, it was slow and lethargic. “Let me see that pretty tongue again, cachorrito.” Javi instantly obeyed your demand, earning a soft hum of approval. 

Letting go of Javi’s hair, you cup the back of his head. Propping you right foot up on the couch, you -kind of awkwardly- move yourself just a bit closer. Now standing over him with a foot on the couch behind him, you gently pull his head closer to your pulsing dick and needy hole. Feeling the pad of his tongue press against you causes you to relax and groan out happily. You start with gentle grinding at first, but your need for more friction quickly takes over your actions. Looking up, you drop your head back as you moan out an expletive. Hearing your response, you hear Javi groan. Gripping the back of Javi’s head, you press yourself against his mouth harder, speeding up your grinding. 

“Fuck cachorrito, your tongue feels so good. If you can make daddy cum without using those wonderful hands of yours,” Your sentence getting cut off but a moaned curse, “I might let you cum dentro de mí.” Lifting your head, you look down at Javi again. Nodding against you, you feel his nose nudging your dick every so often. Gripping his hair -and with a loud moan from the man beneath you- you raise his head just enough so that his nose was practically rubbing your dick. Feeling that all too familiar knot in the pit of your belly growing tighter, you essentially bury his face. 

“Fuck baby boy, I-I’m gonna…ah…I’m gonna-” Before you could finish your words, you feel the knot in your stomach snap, causing your grinding to turn into jerky thrusts. Shooting your head back and eyes squeezed shut, you moan out Javi’s name. Riding your high out on Javi’s tongue, you feel yourself come back to after what felt like an eternity. The first thing you noticed were the moans and whines from the man below you. 

Opening your eyes, you blink a few times, willing your eyes to focus on something. Once focused you look down to Javi, his eyes squeezed shut. Pulling away from his face, his eyes lull open. Dropping your eyes from his euphoric painted face, you look to the new dark spot that has formed. Taking your foot off the couch, you crouch next to Javi while combing through his hair. 

Now at eye level with Javi, you watch his eyes lazily follow you down, the blissed out face relaxing into a tired smile. Smiling back, you dig his hands out from behind his back and help him to his feet. Pulling off his soiled bottoms, you gently guide him to sit on the couch. Planting a soft kiss on the top of his head, you toss the clothes towards the hall that leads to the laundry room. Turning your attention back to Javi, you brush the hair from his face and take a moment to caress his wet cheek. 

“I’ll be right back baby.” Planting one more kiss to his forehead, you turn your attention towards the kitchen. Making your way back to the kitchen, you brighten the light in the living room using the light dimming slide. Stepping into the kitchen you grab a dish towel, you turn toward the small sink that’s hidden away on the inside counter of the island and turn the sink on. Sticking a finger under the falling water, you play around with the knob for a second, finding the perfect temperature. Once finding an acceptable temperature, you soak a corner of the towel. Turning off the knob, you squeeze out the excess water, shaking your hand slightly, getting rid of the dripping water from your hand.

Making your way back to the living room, you grab the tray that Javi had put together for the two of you. Humming the song you had heard him singing earlier, you set the tray on the low sitting coffee table. Cleaning off your hand first, you look at Javi, who has now made himself comfortable, cuddled up with the plush blank that he insisted on keeping on the couch. Chuckling, you make your way so that you can sit next to him. Sitting next to him, you gently reach out and tilt his head so that he is now looking at you.

“Hi baby, let's get you cleaned up yeah?” Feeling him nod slightly against your hand, you smile. Uncrumpling the corner of the rag, you bring it to Javi's face, gently wiping it clean. Folding the corner in on itself you take your hand from his face and pull the blanket down just enough to see his softening cock. Gently taking it in your hand, you feel him jerk with a gasp. Shushing him softly, you quickly -but gently- cleaned him off. Once clean, you toss the wrap towards the clothes you had discarded earlier. 

Gently sitting next to him, you grab the tray and snuggle up against him, resting the tray on your legs. Lifting your arm, you let Javi get comfortable again. Looking at him you couldn’t help but smile; pressing your lips to his forehead, leaving your lips pressed to his forehead for a moment you hum softly before pulling away. 

“I know you meant for us to eat this while fresh, but I know it will still taste amazon bcause you made it.” With you free hand, you pick up a slice of honeydew. Taking a bite you hum in pleasure. “So I recognize the churros and th ehot chocolate, what this other thing?” Taking another bite of the melon you watch him grab the small fried pucks, he offers it to you.

“Yes, this would have been better warm, but it is still good. It wass how mi madre used to make her after mass chorizo and cuajada empanada.” Nodding softly, you open your mouth, allowing him to press the mini empanada to your tongue. Pulling his finger from your mouth, Javi gives you a big smile on his face, dimple and all. Closing your mouth you bite through the still mostly crunchy shell, as the mingled flavors spill into your mouth, you taste it. Resting you head back you hum loud.

“Javi, these are amazing.” Lifting your head you look at Javi, swallowing the on ehad given you. Sitting your melon slice back on the tray, you grab another mini empanada. “Thank you for doing all of this,” You gesture to the food. “For me.” You lean and give him a quick peck on the cheek before popping the small crispy food into your mouth. Hearing him chuckle, you look at him. “What’s so funny?” You playfully pout, chewing the food. 

“I Just thought os something. If you and mi abuela Claudia, she would have loved you.” Hearing him say that makes your smile grow.

“Yeah? You think so?”Swallowing, you grab one of the small glasses of of what looked like orange juice, and brought it to your lips, tilting it to take a drink. Swallowing down the liquid, you notice that it wasn’r orange juice, it was mango juice. “I like the mango juice it’s different.” You press another kiss to Javi’s forehead.

“Sí, abula Claudia loved everyone like her own. She didn’t care who you were, where you came from, or the social group you came from. She was everyone’s abula.” Nodding you turn your head and rest your head on his.

“She sounded wonderful.” You speak in a hushed tone.

“She was.” Javi matched your tone, hand now resting on yours. 

Taking a slow deep breath, you slowly exhale. Relax into the couch and Javi’s steadily raisind and fall chest. Once content and comfortable you cleared your throat.

“So tell me about the churros. I thought those were a sweet treat like food.” Your request making Javi laugh. Laughing yourself, you nudge him playfully. “Hey laughing isn’t funny.” You squeeze Javi into your side for a moment before loosening your hold on him. 

“Normally yes, but these are different. But that’s all I’ll say, try on.” Reaching up he grabs one and dipps it into the hot chocolate. Pulling the churro out, you notice that the hot chocolate is thicker than you were expecting. “The hot chocolate is called, champurrado. It’s thicken hot chocolate.” Bring it closer to your face, you chuckle before take a bite. 

“Holy shit baby. I didn’t know your family was full of chiefs.” You joke, making him laugh. 

“What can I say? I like being full of surprises. Now shush, eat.” Javi nudged you back, making you laugh a bit louder. Playfully raising your hand in surrender, you sigh dramatically.

“Okay party pooper.” Laughing together once more, you sigh before digging into the breakfast.

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@pascalsanctuary @readingiskeepingmegoing

@jessthebaker

[obsessedwithpedritoofc]

Oɴᴇ Mᴏʀᴇ Pᴀʀᴛʏ (Jᴀᴠɪ Gᴜᴛɪᴇʀʀᴇᴢ)

ℙ𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘: Javi Gutierrez × Male/GN Reader.

𝕎𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥: 7 k.

𝕊𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪: He was an angel. First, he saved you from being robbed, then he invited you to his party, then... You were sure no one had ever treated you like he did. And you were falling so bad for him.

𝕎𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: teeth rotting fluff, awkwardness, playful flirting, mentions of alcohol, reader is sick and tired of work, javi being a sweetheart as always, allusion to smut, slightly suggestive, allusion to reader being top and javi bottom, swearing, no physical descriptions of reader, no use of Y/N. (lmk if i missed any).

𝔸/ℕ: (gddmn never written something this long) this sht got me giggling my feet into the bed somebody stop me bc next one is gonna be pretty angsty HAHAHAHA IM SO SORRY IM SO EVIL. ahem, anyway, enjoy the fluffiness while you can ehehe. hope you like it <3

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

It had been a terrible idea. And you knew it since the beginning but you decided it didn't matter, since you just wanted to vent a little.

You'd had the worst week ever. You just didn't know how to deal with all your shit anymore, and hell, you needed a rest. From your surroundings, from your life, from the world, from everything.

So you decided to be away from home for a while at night, go back a little later than usual to clean your mind and take some fresh air. You turned your phone off, got lost outside the city, walked through the beach for a couple hours, had a drink or two... 

Man, you needed it.

Ready to go back home a while after midnight, you took a different path instead of the one you use to go home. Your feet hurt and your head was spinning but you hadn't had so much fun in a long time. You found yourself walking alone in a road you didn't know, with not one single building. Just trees, grass and walls not too far away from the coast. You didn't even think you'd been there before, but honestly, you didn't care. You just kept walking, hoping to find a cutshort that would take you home sooner or later.

You weren't that lucky, though.

You had been walking for a while when you started feeling weird, as if someone was watching you, or following you. Then you heard steps behind you. Slow, careful, almost silent steps, and luckily a little far from you. That gave you some time to think, not stopping walking, and then go faster. The steps caught up speed almost immediately. You thought of running, but you refrained, thinking it would only make things worse for you. And you weren't going to die on your day off.

For the first time in all the while you had been walking, you saw a building. It looked like a house —a really big one—, and there were lights of all colors and music bustling out of it. Your heart almost jumped out of your chest at the relief. You just hoped that whoever was inside would hear you having trouble outside.

Right before you could reach the door, the guy behind you ran up to you and kept you from going any farther. He had a knife in one hand, and the other one was extended out to you.

"You know how this goes", he talked. "Money, watch, everything of value you have", his moved his fingers as a sign to give him what you had.

"Look, man, it's been a long day, I don't have anything on me", you tried to convince him.

"Bullshit", he approached you, grabbing his knife more firmly. "I don't wanna kill you, but I will if you don't give me any other choice".

You shook your head no and put your hands up.

"I don't—".

"I said fucking—!".

"Hey, dude!".

Another man approached you and put an arm around you shoulders. You saw the robber put his knife down and into his pocket.

"Where were you? The party started long ago!", the other man pushed you towards the door of the building. Then, for a moment, he turned to the guy that was trying to rob you. "Are you with him? Maybe you want to come inside and enjoy the party with us".

"No, I was going already", he started walking away.

Meanwhile, the man with you stayed at your side and kept pulling you with him into the house. He didn't take his eyes off the robber until he was out of sight.

"Phew, that was close", he turned to you. "Are you hurt?".

For the first time in the while he had been with you, you could see all his features with the light at his door. He had nice, short —though longer than the average— golden hair. The curls at his forehead and the nape of his neck were sticking to his skin because of the sweat. His clothes were stretching his body in all the right places and were just as fine as the rest of him.

Man, God had seen you in trouble and sent you a very angel.

"Yeah", you breathed out. "I mean, no. No, I'm not hurt".

"Good", he scanned your body anyway, seeming to look for any wounds. Then he smiled at you. "I'm glad you're okay. There are many of those around here in the coast rich area, but most of them are more bark than bite", he put a hand on your shoulder. "So, long day?".

Fuck, he had heard you.

"Yeah", you tried to shrug it off with a nervous chuckle. "Just a little too much work, I'm fine".

He chuckled back.

"Maybe you can stay for a while, actually enjoy the party and take a break from what's bothering you".

Damn, he was an angel.

"You really mean it?", you gave him another nervous laugh. "I don't wanna crush it down or something. I don't know anyone in there".

"Well, you know me", he grabbed your shoulder. "Come on, don't be shy. If you feel uncomfortable you just stay with me, but take a break", he looked at you. "Do we have a deal?".

You thought for a minute. His offer was indeed generous. And to be honest, you hadn't had enough with those drinks before. Maybe you needed that party as well. Why reject a little more of your day off when you had it served it on a silver platter?

"You know what? You're right. I do need the break".

The man smiled.

"Great!", he extended his hand out to you. "I'm Javi, by the way".

Damn, that accent got in your nerves.

"It's nice meeting you, Javi", you shook his hand.

"Come on in, I will get you into the party", not letting go of your hand, he guided you inside the house.

That place was fucking huge.

Most of the people were inside the pool, having a drink and chatting. They all looked like bigwigs, people with great wealth and too full of themselves. You couldn't really complain, you expected it from someone like Javi —he already gave off that vibe with the clothes he was wearing and the house he was in, but you didn't want to judge too soon. You tried not to, since this was not Javi, but his guests. Maybe he wasn't like that. No, you were sure, certain, that he wasn't like that. He'd been too nice to you to be an asshole.

"And this is Gabriela", Javi introduced you to a woman at last. She looked nice as well. "She runs the agricultural operations here".

"Nice to meet you, sir", she smiled at you and shook your hand.

"Sure", you smiled back, then approached her discretely. "You take care of him, eh? He's like a little fish in a shark tank", you whispered.

"Don't I know well", she rolled her eyes. She laughed an put a hand on your shoulder. "You're a good man. Thanks for worrying about him".

"Yeah, he kinda saved my life. It's the least I can do".

"What are you two gossiping about?", Javi laughed this time. "Gabriella, can you go check on the pool? I think I saw someone having trouble with the waiters".

"Damn it", she muttered. "It was nice to meet you", she turned to you one last time before running to the pool.

Javi approached you once more. He had a wide smile on his face and he looked beautiful with the colorful lights dancing on his skin. You took your time looking at him. He almost seemed younger than he did when he went to help you against the robber.

"So, enjoying yourself?", he looked at you this time.

"Yeah, it's a nice party", you grabbed your beer and leaned back on the counter, crossing your arms. "You usually do this stuff? Party all the time?", you took a sip.

"No, not really", Javi laughed. "I don't usually throw parties without a reason".

"And what's the reason of this one?". 

He took a moment to answer.

"I don't know if you've seen those olive trees over there", he gesture towards the backyard of his house with his head. "I own more of them olive groves a couple miles from here. I run a little business and we found a new client", he smiled in excitement. That made you smile as well.

"That's nice", you tried to show him you were glad. "I'm proud of you", you stopped to think for a moment. "Did that sound weird?".

Javi laughed again.

"No, not at all", he bumped your shoulder. "Thank you".

"It's nothing", you leaned on your side to be closer to him. "Between you and me", you spoke softly so no one else could hear you; "I thought you were one of those rich assholes with a big shit ego".

"And I'm not?", he said sarcastically.

"Well, it's a bit soon to judge", you answered with sarcasm as well. "But nah, I don't think you are. I've been here for half an hour and no one's been half as nice as you were to me. Except Gabriela. She's also good", you winked at him. "Good thing you've kept her around, huh?", you looked at him with a mischievous smile.

"Oh no, don't do that", he chuckled nervously. "She and I are just friends".

That somehow gave you some sort of relief.

"You say whatever you want", you insisted nonetheless. "But I can see it in her eyes".

Javi shook his head no, but he laughed once more and didn't say anything else.

You stayed by his side for the rest of the night, enjoying the party and getting drunk with people that would probably forget you in a couple hours, but you didn't care. At this point, you let go of your prejudices since you just wanted to enjoy the night while you could and forget about your problems for as long as it lasted.

You woke up with no upper clothes and wrapped in satin sheets. It took you a couple minutes to realize where you were. You tried to get up, but the pulsing headache that appeared at the sudden movement sent you back to the bed.

"Oh, you're awake", Javi walked inside the room with a mug in his hands. He offered it to you. "I figured hangover would hit you hard so I made you some tea. It will help reduce the pain".

You grabbed the mug and immediately started drinking. Hell, he was even nicer than you had seen last night. He really was an angel.

"Thanks", your voice sounded deeper than usual, even after having just woken up. Javi was right —headache had hit you hard. "What happened last night?", you took another sip from the tea. "I reckon I drank too much, but...", you looked at him waiting for an answer.

"You're okay, don't worry", he smiled at you and sat on the bed beside you. "You're right, you drank too much. You fell asleep on the couch when people started leaving and I took you to this bed. I thought you would be more comfortable".

Fuck, he's so cute.

"Thanks, really. You didn't have to", you bumped his shoulder with your own, leaning on his side for a second too long.

"Of course I did, what kind of host would I be if I hadn't done it?".

Shit, you were liking this man way too much for your own good.

"You know, you've just proved I was right all along", you smirked. Javi looked at you in slight confusion. "You're not like all those rich assholes with big shit ego from yesterday night".

"Oh, right", he laughed when he remembered. "Fine, I'll give you that one", he got up from the bed. "If you want breakfast, the table is served for three".

Oh, right, Gabriela.

"Don't worry, I'll eat at my place", you smiled at him and got up as well, hanging the empty mug out for him. "I gotta go to work and we barely know each other, it wouldn't be right if I—".

"Nonsense", he grabbed both of your shoulders and started pushing you downstairs. "You're going to shut the fuck up, and you're going to accept my breakfast, and then I will drive you home".

"What? No no no, no way. You're bothering too mu—".

"What did I say about shutting...?", he waited for you to complete his sentence.

"I'm gonna shut the fuck up", you tried to hide your giggle, unsuccessfully.

"That's right", he snapped his fingers and pointed his index at you. You laughed again.

Just like Javi intended, you ate his breakfast without complaint. Gabriela ate with you as well, until she had to go and do her labor as head of agricultural operations, like Javi had said last night. He stayed with you until you were done, then gave you some clean clothes and offered his shower to you. You refused like you could, having a little trouble with Javi's stubbornness, but nothing you couldn't handle. Still, you accepted the clothes and got changed before he drove you home.

"Thanks for everything, Javi. Really", you got off the car. 

"My pleasure", he smiled at you. "By the way", he took his phone and handed it to you. "I'm going to need your number", he looked at you with a light smirk. "You know, for the troubles you caused me", he joked. "And in case I throw another party soon", he gave you a sincere smile now. "It was nice having you around. It wouldn't have been the same without you".

You smiled back and typed your number on his phone, then have it back to him. 

"Alright. I'll be waiting for you to text me. Do tell me if you throw more parties, though. I had fun last night", you winked at him. "I'll see you soon. And thanks again".

"It was nothing", he started the car again. "See you".

You watched as he drove away from you. As soon as you lost sight of him, you let out a breath you didn't know you were holding in. A smile crept onto your lips involuntarily as you walked into your house. You didn't know what he had done to you, but you really couldn't wait to see Javi again, as soon as possible.

You weren't expecting him to text you then. Not in the middle of a work meeting, not too weeks after seeing each other for the first time. You took a look at the phone from the corner of your eye, but left it on the side. When the meeting was finally over, you opened his message.

'Hey, I'm having a party at my place tomorrow night, do you want to come?'.

You laughed at what he had texted. You had already been talking the past weeks, and he had invited you over to his house, but you had been too full of work to even go somewhere that wasn't from home to work and from work to home. Maybe a little more time resting wouldn't be that bad after all.

I deserve it, you thought.

So, you warned your coworkers you wouldn't be available on weekend and got ready to spend a hellish slow couple of days before going to Javi's party. 

When Saturday night finally arrived, you hurried to his house with as much elegance as you could. You were aware that Javi's parties —or at least the last and first one you had gone to— weren't as formal as your clothes that night, but you wanted to cause a good impression on the rest of those rich fuckers, unlike last time.

You warned Javi you were at his door a couple minutes before you actually arrived. You wanted to make sure you'd make it there safe and without encountering any other robber like that last time.

"Hey!", he gave you a wide smile as soon as he saw you. He pulled you in for a hug, which surprised you —in a good way. Still, you returned it without wasting a second.

"Hey", you squeezed him tight, like he was doing, then pulled away and smiled back at him. 

"What are you wearing?", he grabbed your shoulders and took a good look at you, scanning you upside down. "Wow, that is what I call a party outfit!", he laughed.

Well, you did cause a good impression on him.

"Thanks", you posed dramatically. "Wanted to impress these motherfuckers".

"You want to impress them?", he gave you a sarcastically surprised and hurt expression. "I thought you wanted to impress me!", he couldn't hold his laughter in this time.

Man, had you missed his laughs.

"Well, that too", you laughed as well. Your eyes shifted to the lights inside the mansion for a moment. "Am I too late?".

"Not too much. I call this being fashionably late".

"Oh, you got a name for everything?", you mocked at him.

"Not really, I just came up with that one", he chuckled again. "Come on, let's get inside".

Like the last time, you enjoyed the party staying by Javi's side most of the time. You weren't used to being between all the rich bigwigs yet, at least not the mean ones. So you stayed with the nicest of them, drinking a bit, sitting by the pool or the counter inside the mansion.

You made sure not to drink in excess this time so you get home on your own. You were still embarrassed by the fact that you had slept on one of Javi's bed and he'd had to take you home. So you tried to end the night as sober as possible.

When everyone started leaving, you waited with your friend inside one of the rooms. He claimed to be hiding from everyone's goodbyes and the crowd walking outside, and he liked to keep good company in the meantime.

"I think I should get going", you said after everything stayed silent. You got up, offering Javi your hand. "It was nice coming to your party again", you smiled at him.

"Why don't you stay for the night?", he grabbed your hand and got up as well, his touch lingering for a moment too long. "It's a bit late, it could be dangerous".

"Don't worry, I'll be fine", you started walking towards the door. "Call me when you're having another party, these are pretty fun".

Javi forced a smile.

"Of course!", he walked with you. "Let me accompany you to the door".

You let him, and he gave you one last hug before you left.

"Text me when you're home. I want to make sure you get there safe, not encounter any more robbers", he gave you a sincere smile.

Turns out he was even cuter than you thought.

"Sure", you couldn't help the blush that crept up your neck and to your cheeks and the stupid smile that came with it.

You walked to the nearest bus stop and got home safe and sound. You immediately texted Javi to let him know. He replied almost immediately as well.

'That's good! Thanks for coming tonight, you lit up the party'.

You blushed again. Damn, how the hell could he get in your nerves so easily with a smile message?

'My pleasure, I'll come over any time ;)', you replied.

Maybe the wink was a bit too much, you thought, though you didn't give it much more importance when he answered back.

'Maybe you can come one day that I'm not having a party. Those people are a little too noisy. I'm free next Friday, are you in?'.

Your heart skipped a beat.

Was he inviting you —not to a party, but to just spend time? With him? In his house? Just the two of you?

'You sure? I don't wanna be a burden, you should enjoy your day off'.

He took a while to reply, and he got you on the maddening verge of a happiness attack.

'That's right! I'm sure I will enjoy my day off better with you. You should come over!'.

You took in a deep breath and told you to get your shit together. It was happening, alright, but you only knew this man from one party. Well, two. How come that was happening to you?

I knew he was too cute, you thought.

You wanted to say yes so badly that you barely thought about it. You gave yourself an excuse, and of course you'd tell your work coworkers later. Little did you care about what they would say about you being too calm and not working much in the last weeks.

'Alright, I'm in. But don't you dare say I fucked up your day off', was your reply to his invitation.

'I won't', he promised. You swore you could feel his laugh through his text. 'See you next week'.

You smiled.

'See ya'.

Damn.

One week.

You had one week to mentally prepare yourself for what was to come.

You were going to be in Javi's house, alone with him, no party, and no one else around to bother you —well, except for Gabriela, but you didn't really worry much about her.

You hadn't wanted something that much in a long time.

There you were again. At his door, looking up at the front of his mansion, admiring the vines that climbed along the walls, breathing in the salty air blowing from the beach nearby, trying to spot him through one of the many windows.

Was this place so imposing before?

The door opened right in your face. You fell to the ground after the person behind it accidentally hit you.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!", Gabriela offered you her hand, which you took so she could help you stand up. "I thought you hadn't arrived yet and—!".

"Hey, it's okay. I didn't text Javi, it was my fault", you smiled at her. "It didn't hurt that much either. You can rest, soldier".

She laughed.

"Fine. I'm sorry anyway", she adjusted her bag on her shoulder. "I was going already, Javi is waiting for you".

"You're going? I thought you lived here".

"I do, but Javi told me he wanted the house clear tonight", she gave you a knowing smirk. "But I'm not going to clean it up when I come back, so try to leave the sheets clean when you're done".

"Oh my god!", you stuck out your tongue in faked disgust. You did want it to happen. "What's wrong with you?", you laughed. She did, too.

"Nothing. By now", she squinted her eyes, as if trying to warn you. "You break his heart and I'll tear yours out off your chest".

"What?!".

"I'm just kidding! Or not, who knows", she gave you a soft pat on the shoulder. "I hope I see you soon. Have fun!", she smiled at you one last time before walking away.

"Yeah... Thanks...", you said, more to yourself than to her.

You turned to look at the mansion again. There was one lit window. You smiled, figuring Javi would be preparing things —or himself— for when you arrived. You took out your phone and took a picture of it before sending it to him with a text.

'Already down here. Gabriela left the door open. Do I come in, or you gonna come receive like a gentleman?'.

'I'm sorry but I'm no gentleman, I'm just a rich asshole with a big shit ego', was his reply.

'Didn't I tell you I had changed my mind about it?'.

'You're right hahaha'.

You visualized his smile and laughter when you read that. It made you smile as well.

'Seriously, though. Can you be your own gentleman this time? I'm still preparing things. I have something planned for us'.

Your heart skipped a beat when dirty thoughts came to your mind. You scolded yourself for thinking about your friend like that, but you shook it off quickly with an excuse to blame him for it.

'Fine, rich asshole with a big shit ego', you smirked at your own message. 'Coming in right now'.

'Second floor, third door to the left'.

You walked into the mansion with a smile plastered on your lips. You couldn't hide your excitement for whatever it was he had planned for you. In a way, you did hope it was related to what Gabriela had referred to before. But deep, very deep inside you, buried by the thought that he was just your friend and you had met him a couple weeks before. 

You climbed upstairs with your heart going as fast as a Ferrari. You didn't know what to expect from Javi —or the room itself— the moment you opened the door. To your pleasant surprise, you just found him setting plates and bowls with food on a small table in front of a big, comfortable-looking couch. Behind him, there was a huge TV with a peculiar selection of movies.

"Oh hi", he smiled wide at you when he saw you. He immediately walked up at you and hugged you like he had when you came to his second party —well, the second one for you. You involuntarily breathed in his essence. It had a little smell to those olive trees of his, and a bit of coffee and sea salt as well. Your eyes rolled back into your skull, also involuntarily. "How are you doing?".

"Better now. I hate working on Fridays. And now my coworkers hate me for not working this Friday", you pulled away. "But fuck them, Javi wants his fun on his day off".

"Sorry", his face scrunched in regret.

"No, don't worry. I need more of those days off anyway", you grabbed his arm and pulled him onto the couch with you. "And I got a feeling that you do, too".

"Yes, you're right", he yawned dramatically. "Owning olive groves is a terribly tiring job".

"You shut the fuck up!", you punched his shoulder. He let out a soft "ouch" as you gave him a disbelief wide-open mouth. "You could literally take every day off and you would still be doing millions!".

Javi shrugged with a smile and laughed at you.

"I guess I am a rich asshole with a big shit ego after all".

Your lips pressed into a straight line and you hit his arm again, then laughed with him.

"Anyway", you cleared your throat. "What did you say you had planned for us?", you looked at the screen in front of you. "Wait, aren't all those Nicolas Cage's movies?".

"Oh no, you caught me", he pretended to be disappointed, then he laughed again. "I'm his biggest fan".

"Oh cool! The guy I thought was a rich big mama's boy fucker is actually a freak!", you put a hand on his shoulder and gave him a smirk. "I'm proud of you".

"I don't know if I should feel good or weird", he leaned back on the couch, his face holding a worried expression.

"Coming from me, it's a compliment".

"Fine", he grabbed the remote. "Which of these do you want to watch?".

"We really have to watch Nicolas Cage?", you gave him an exasperated look. For a moment, his expression shifted and he looked like he had seen a ghost. Then you laughed. "Just kidding, I don't mind", you patted his back once. "It's your day off, you choose".

Javi smiled and immediately proceed to play the first Cage movie he saw.

You didn't say a word during it all, just eating the food Javi had set on the table and shifting positions on the couch every now and then. He was decent enough to pause the movie when you had to use the bathroom, and he treated you as nice as he had the previous times.

When the movie was finally over, you got up to stretch your legs. Javi stayed seated, looking at you with expectant eyes as you cracked your back and legs.

"Well...", he started talking. "I know it was a bit boring, I apologize".

"What? It wasn't! I had fun", you smiled back at him. "I needed an afternoon like this, just chilling".

"Really?", he looked amazed for a moment, then he cleared his throat. "Sure, I needed it, too", he chuckled. You also did. "I just... I know you just know me from a couple of parties, and that you think I'm the rich asshole with big shit ego to you", he laughed again. "But I didn't want you to only know that me. It's not the real me, and I don't want you to think it is. That is just the facade I show to all the real rich fuckers", he was looking at you with a serious expression. "I wanted you to know Javi for who he really is, not what he does for all the people around him".

Your stomach dropped.

That was the most stupid, cheesy, and the cutest thing anyone had ever said to you.

Wait, did that mean...? No, it couldn't have meant that.

Or maybe it did?

He wanted you, out of all the people —even with Gabriela living with him—, to know him how he really was, and not the version he showed to everyone else. He didn't want you, out of all the people, to think he was someone he wasn't —the him everyone else thought he was.

"I'm...", you started talking, even though you were almost speechless. "I'm glad you didn't want me to see you how others do", you finally said when you found the words. He smiled at you almost stupidly wide. "Thank you for letting me see you, and not the rich asshole with big shit ego everyone else sees".

Javi chuckled again.

"Fuck, you really hate the bigwigs, don't you?", he laughed along with you.

"I don't hate them", you shrugged. "I just don't like them at all".

You laughed for a while, filling the silence of the room, until it returned again. Javi looked at you with sparkling eyes, something you hadn't seen in him before in the time you'd known him. It made your heart jump and your stomach flutter with butterflies. You returned the smile with the exact same stupid wideness.

"Do you...", he started talking again, then cleared his throat again. "Do you want to stay for another movie?".

You almost couldn't hide your smile.

"It's getting a bit late", you looked through the window behind you. "Maybe I should go home. And I don't wanna be a burden—".

"Stay for the night", he got up and took a step closer to you. "You won't be a burden", he looked at you with pleading eyes. "You're not a burden to me".

For a moment, you pretended to fight your troubled thoughts. Then you couldn't help the smirk that played on your lips.

"Don't you dare give me shit tomorrow morning because I snore too loud", you dropped weight back on the couch.

"I won't, I promise", he gave you the widest, sweetest smile you had seen on him and sat beside you.

"You better keep that promise".

He pulled you in for a kiss as soon as he saw you were done talking. His hands, big and soft, grabbed your face as cautious as you had been touched, ever. His fingertips danced on your skin as a consequence of his nervousness —he tried to hide the way he was shaking, but he couldn't. His lips felt soft on yours, barely applying any pressure on you, barely gracing your skin. He didn't want you to feel violated, he was worried that you wouldn't want that and that you would react in a violent way.

All the overthinking made him pull away quickly after giving you a small peck. He kept his hands on your face for a moment too long as he stared into your eyes. When he paused to scan your features, he realized and pulled away immediately once again.

"Sorry", he whispered, his eyes shifting to your lips for a split second before going back to your eyes.

"For what?", you smiled.

He took a moment to process it all. Then he smiled back.

His hands went back to the sides of your face and he kissed you again, this time deeper, longer, more filled with passion. This time he showed you how he felt, told you the way his heart was beating faster because of you. But he didn't do it with words, he made it clear with the force yet softness of his kiss.

"I'm going to Italy", he pulled a bit away from you so he could speak.

"What?", you got on your knees on the couch and moved farther from him, looking into his eyes and all his face. Javi looked at you as if asking for forgiveness.

"Next week. Wednesday".

You huffed.

"For how long?", you leaned your side on the couch backrest.

"Two weeks".

You bit your tongue as you thought how were you supposed to react. You wanted to be mad at him, for waiting until now to tell you that. But then again, it wasn't like you were in a relationship or anything —or even that good friends.

"You. Are. Such. A fucker", you approached him and got on his lap, straddling him.

"What? Why?", he barely got the words out of his mouth, too focused on how you were moving over him.

"You invite me to your parties", you undid the first buttons of his shirt. "You act all cute and pretty, sticking to me like a little puppy and making me stick to you like one", you leaned down and started pressing soft kisses to his neck and clavicle. Javi sighed in pleasure. "And then you go to another fucking country and have me two weeks waiting for you", you pulled away. "It's not fair".

"It's a business thing", he managed to say. "I didn't even know it until yesterday".

"Oh, yesterday?", you leaned down, keeping short inches between his face and yours. "And still you waited until now to tell me", you bit his downer lip. "You're a bad boy...".

He gulped. Of course he knew what would happen next. Hell, he had been awaiting for that moment for weeks but he didn't even know how to react with you on top of him like that!

"It's not my fault", he gathered enough bravery to sit up and speak. "I didn't know. And I didn't have to tell you. You have only come to two of my parties, and I have to tell you that I'm going to Italy for work?", he smiled at you half sarcastically, half mockingly.

"Hm", you shrugged. "Touché", you pushed him back down onto the couch. "But you still owe me one thing".

Javi smirked.

"What is it?", he looked down at your lips. You fisted the neck of his shirt.

"A decent kiss".

"Was that last one not decent?".

You chuckled.

"Shut up", you pulled him in your direction and dived your tongue into his mouth.

You woke up with no clothes and wrapped in satin sheets. It took you a moment to remember everything that had happened the night before and where you were. You looked to your side, finding Javi with just as many clothes as you and snoring peacefully. Sleeping like that, he looked even cuter than he already was.

You wrapped your arms around him and kissed the back of his neck. You pulled him as close to you as possible, nuzzling his neck and breathing in his morning smell as your legs tangled with his. Javi groaned.

"Wha...?", he looked back with sleepy eyes. A hoarse giggle left his lips as soon as he saw you. "Good morning...", he pushed his butt back onto you. You hugged him by the hips and pulled him even closer.

"Good morning", you left a soft kiss on his jaw. He turned around to face you. "You look so cute when you sleep", your thumb swiped over his cheekbone.

"Well, you snore too loud".

"You!", you hit his shoulder softly. "You promised you wouldn't be mad at me for that!".

"Did I?", he opened one of his eyes, then shut it again. "I don't remember that conversation...".

"Oh, right", you left a small bite on the crook of his neck, next to the many he already had. Javi gasped quietly. "You interrupted me when I was telling you to keep your promise".

"Mmh... Did I?", he insisted. He laughed at your expression, filled with dissatisfaction. "Wait, I think I'm remembering something now...".

"You're such an idiot", you slapped his shoulder once again. He kept chuckling.

Your phone vibrating from the floor put you both out of your blissful state. You groaned, knowing what it meant.

You got up from the bed and bent down to grab your phone. Just as you thought, it was your alarm telling you to wake up.

"Shit", you threw your head back with a disappointed whine. "Gotta go to work".

"Don't worry. I will make you breakfast", he pulled the bedsheets off. As he was trying to get up, he had to grab the headboard to not fall. You immediately went to him and put an arm under his shoulders to help him steady himself.

"You okay?", you stared into his eyes, concerned.

"Yes", he smiled up at you. "My legs hurt a bit, that's all".

"Huh", you smirked. "Too rough for you, Mister Gutierrez?", you mocked him.

"Shut up. It was you who wasn't satisfied after three rounds", he tried to get back up on his own, but fell back into your arms.

"Oh, come on. Did you like it or not?", you looked at him with the same mischievous smirk. He didn't answer. "That's what I thought", you put him to sit back on the bed and grabbed his clothes from the floor, handing them to him. "I'll help you with breakfast. And I'm driving myself to work, don't you dare even think of you doing it".

Javi chuckled, taking his clothes and starting to put them on.

"Fine", he watched as you put on your own pants. "On one condition".

You helped him stand back again. Your eyes stayed glued to his, your lips inches away from the other's.

"What?", you whispered, your breath hot on Javi's face. He gave your lips a quick peck.

"You have to come back on Tuesday night", he smiled at you. "One more party before I go. Just the two of us".

You thought about it, moving your face from side to side.

"I guess I can pull a few strings", you giggled and kissed him back. "I'll be here".

"Good", he hugged you, almost tripping on his own feet. You grabbed his arms to help him back up. "Thank you".

You helped him with breakfast and everything he needed that morning —made him coffee, cooked some eggs and took care of him and his leg pain. You made sure to clean up your mess before Gabriela killed you for it, and you also cleaned the room Javi and you had used the previous evening to eat and watch that terrible Nicolas Cage movie he had chosen. You may or may have not stolen some clean clothes from him so you could change on your way to work, too —though he didn't seem to mind.

When it was time for you to say goodbye, you were the one to pull Javi in for the tightest hug you could give him, and the sweetest kiss any of you had ever given to someone else. He made you promise you'd be back there on Tuesday, and so you did.

Why does he look cuter every time I'm with him?, you thought as you looked into his eyes in the last goodbye.

Just like you had promised him, you were back in his house on Tuesday afternoon. You had fought with teeth and nails to be free from work that day —or the afternoon at the very least. You didn't come across Gabriela that time. Javi told you she was already gone when you arrived into his mansion. 

He made sure you enjoyed each second of your time together that evening. You also had many endless "No, you choose" fights, but you managed to survive and spend one of the best afternoons you'd ever had. You both knew how much you would miss each other while Javi was away so you made the most of your time.

Fuck, it's gonna be just two weeks and I'm gonna be so miserable, you cursed yourself many times for being too attached to a man you had only seen four times in the last month. Part of you wished to stay this attached to him, hoping and praying that it wouldn't be just the emotion of the first times and then it would be just as boring as one of those arranged marriages.

Damn, had you fallen hard for this man.

You said your last goodbye on Wednesday early morning. This time, you let Javi drive you home before he headed to the airport. You went back to bed for a couple more hours before you had to go back to work. You knew Javi wouldn't be in touch for at least four hours until he got to Italy. Of course, you had told him to warn you when he arrived, and so he did.

You kept in touch with him all the time he was away. You called him every night and texted him when he wasn't working, wishing him luck on it all and telling him to stay safe. Both of you made clear how much you were waiting to see each other again when he got back to Majorca, many times.

And you really couldn't wait for him to come back.

[freshlyrage]

Running Like Water

Chapter 3

whats playing: Ivy by Frank Ocean

pairing: Javier Peña x OFC (written as xReader)

fic warnings: Explicit Smut (18+ MDNI) language, strained family relationships, mentions of drug abuse, discussions of insecurities and body image issues, daddy and mommy issues, first few chapters are flashbacks to high school, they WILL NOT be explicit just fluff.

fic tags: Best friends younger sister, Life-long crush, Friends to lovers, Unrequited love, slow burn, Push and Pull, Small Town Dynamics, Secret Relationships, latina MC, Fluff and Angst, OFC!Jessica Alba face claim, sorry Lorraine I'm bringing you into this, Time jumps, 2 year age gap, pre-canon

A/N: Didn't think I'd have the entire "before" aspect of this story drag on so long but the angst is so needed. There is nothing angstier than an unrequited high school romance. This is a short one. The Javi we know will come soon, mama is working!

Also... it will be very clear that I don't know much about the police... surely not business I care about either! Go along with whatever I say though.

word count: 3.8k

Your first kiss was technically one that you didn’t ask for so to make up for it, a week later you got shit faced at Monica’s and sucked face with Daniel from chemistry, a junior. Half of it was because you were fresh off seeing Lorraine and Javier kiss in the hallway just 2 hours prior so making out with Daniel was kind of a no brainer.  

Your shoes squeaked against the polished school tiles, still in your gym attire. Your hair tied in a ponytail as you walked to get your clothes from the locker, you didn’t really trust the gym lockers after a top of yours got stolen. Steps from behind you hurry. “You hooked up with Daniel?” Javier’s voice echoed in the empty hall. Eyes widening. Your eyes scan the hall for on lookers. 

He stands next to you, shortening his steps once he's leveled. Using his own line on him with narrowed eyes, “Don’t you have class? Stalker…” You hadn't really spent time together after new year’s but he and Lorraine sent a bouquet of flowers to your house on your 16th birthday. Catching up in the halls was what had to suffice. He’d tell you how it was going with Lorraine and then you would find an excuse to hurry away before getting too jealous.

He lifts the wooden pass, “It’s called a bathroom break cariño, answer my question.” He uses a pet name that he’s been fond of recently. You purse your lips trying to hide the smile, he catches on and returns it. God, any display of endearment could have you in a puddle at his feet. 

Despite the little worms in your brain screaming, sexy man, sexy man, alert alert, you manage to ground yourself to answer his invasive question. “I did, although its none of your business.” You wanted it to be his business so bad, but you knew he truly didn’t care for the reasons you wanted him to. He cared in that over-protective overbearing friend way. Emphasis on friend. You approach your locker and he leans against the one next to it. His broad stance always gets you, those guys in your brain are getting loud again when you notice his collarbone poking out his shirt as he leaned. His eyes imitating the narrowed look you gave him a few seconds prior. It’s been this way in school, back and forth teasing.

It drove you insane.

He sucks his teeth, “It became my business when I have to defend you in a locker room, Daniel had quite the mouth on him.” He mutters a see how long that will last. Your cheeks were red already from the workout, thank god. Always on your side. He peaks into your locker, spotting an orange sitting on your textbooks and grabs it. You slap his hand but he was already peeling.

Curiosity sparking in you, “What did he say.”

Javier’s lips went to a straight line and he shakes his in disapproval. “I’m not telling you.” The tips of his thumbs dripping with the citrusy juice. It made your stomach pit, wanting to pull his thumb into your mouth and lick him clean.

What am I thinking...

You chest stutters in a breath and you snatch the orange from his hand, earning a hey… from him.

“What. Did. He. Say.” You cross your arms, hiding the orange. Any more of that erotic fruit touching and you were going to pounce him. He stands up straight, a smirk playing on his lips. “Tell me.” You demand. You kind of felt silly in that moment but he seemed to be amused at your conviction. Javier’s face drops for a moment, his eyes doing that thing when he looks down at you.

His arms cross mirroring your stance. “He said you were a great kisser for a cherry.” your eyebrows pull together confused. Your arms drop. Cherry? Was I wearing cherry Chapstick?

“A cherry?”

“A virgin you idiot” He grabs the orange, and your eyes go wide not even caring as he continued to make a mess with the fruit. “I told him not to be so vulgar just so you know, s’gross” he mutters. You feel the sentiment in his voice, but anger rushes over you. It expressed itself with a sigh and a slam shut of the locker. You look back at him eating the fruit, stupid fucking orange. 

With the thought of Daniel telling your personal business to a group of pervs you begin walking back to gym with a bit of frustration in your step. Javier was still following like a lost puppy, like he was waiting for something. You take in a shaky breath as you look back to him, his eyes wide and worried that he might've ruined your mood. “Thank you- for always being on my side.” You admit and his eyes go to that place that it usually went when looking at you. You wanted to say softness and in your dreams, it was adoration. But it couldn’t be.

His lips flatten and he nods, “I always will be you know.” He confesses and your eyes fall to your sneakers, nodding at the ground. This was a bit too much for you in this moment. You feel like you could burst. 

The two of you approach the large wooden doors to your gym class. You stop and he follows. You look up to him with a look of adoration, one you thought he had just given you, you just couldn’t help it. And you felt-just for a moment. You felt like he actually mirrored it. Like he finally looked at you with the look you were giving him.

The still air of the hallway and the sounds of students working behind closed doors throws you for a loop then remind you of where you were at. Back to earth Andrea.

 You awkwardly point to the door and he nods. “I-um.” You laugh, “I have to change.”

“Yeah-yeah. I’ll see you around Andrea.” He reaches out for your shoulder and squeezes it before walking away. Your stomach rises and falls at the grab, feeling like this had been a moment between you two. You tucked it in the corner of your mind next to every other interaction you romanticized. 

“Are you even hard?” The familiar voice comes from his lap. He blinks a few times seeing Lorraine’s head covering his length. He shakes his head for a moment and she frowns, moving her mouth from Javi. She sits up in the car seat, wiping her mouth and he tucks himself back in his jeans. His heart skips a beat in embarrassment but his mind wasn't in the moment  The truth was his thoughts were everywhere but in the car with his girl in his lap. And It wasn’t like it was bad, him and Lorraine did this so often but for some reason it felt wrong in that moment.

He zips up his pants, looking out at the dirt road they had parked at when she slipped her hand over his jeans while he drove out of school. She did things like that often, she really was the breeder type. Always wanting to have sex, Javier didn’t mind of course. He loved it, it was the one thing he knew he was good at. And shit, at that point it was holding them together. “I’m sorry baby.” He reaches to grab her hand, bringing it to his lips. She can’t help but smile. Lorraine had really liked Javier, they argue lots but she knew that he had a caring heart. And she wasn’t going to give up on him just because they had arguments, even explosive ones.

“What’s on your mind my love?” She twitches her hand to signal that she wanted him to kiss it again. You hadn’t known that Javier and Lorraine argued so much, you would have never been able to tell. And he sure as hell wasn’t going to tell you. Javier almost shudders at the nickname, for some reason it felt… he wasn’t sure. Inappropriate? Wrong?

But Javier’s mind had been occupied for many reasons. The biggest being the call he got two weeks prior. A request from a recruiter from the police training he had been at in the summer. They were going on about how he’d be legal this summer and how they’d like to get him on track with joining the force and providing "schooling accommodations". They had a heavy emphasis on “needing younger guys.”

He sat in silence in his room after the call, staring at his Houston PD poster overhead. 

Being a cop-not even- just being someone to protect had been his dream. There had been some deeply rooted issues that made him try to grapple at any opportunity to make someone feel safe, he felt far too young to tackle whatever that feeling was. But when he got a taste of it during his year in Houston, he knew it was were he wanted to be. Of course, he inquired about the “accommodations” which really were him dropping out and taking the GED instead, so he could move over to Houston, alone. Javier though, was comfortable here again. He had his girl, and his dad.

Frankie-Andrea. Andrea. You. He couldn’t bare leave you at that school by yourself. He felt kind of silly for thinking that way, he knew you could handle pretty much anything but he hated the thought of not even being there. It was simple to him, he liked being around you. At times he felt like it was you who was his best friend, not Frankie. You never pried, you never asked for too much, you never bickered and you were always happy to see him. He wasn't used to a simple relationship. He feared that maybe he liked mess, maybe he liked arguing and fights but then he was reminded of the calm your presence caused him. It wasn't that he liked mess, he might've liked having one thing to make things feel better, almost a taunting image of what good could look like in his life. Javier closed his eyes in a fit of shaking breaths when he got the call, he saw your face in the dark. He couldn't stand to leave you. He hadn’t realized how much he hated that idea until he came back after your year apart.

 The locker room earlier today proving that. Peeling off his shoes, applying deodorant. Daniel was sitting on the changing bench. He had barely participated in gym so his maintenance wasn’t as tedious like volleyball season for gym. Now that’s how you got Javier to participate.

“And she even touched me through my jeans, I almost-fuck man” He laughs loudly, a few other knuckle heads laughing with him. Javier listened on but wasn’t too intrigued, he had a few friends outside of Frankie and them- and they sure as hell weren’t losers like Daniel and his little posse of idiots.

“Man, you’re lucky. I saw her leaving gym a few days ago, it should be illegal to let girls wear those shorts in school.” Another voice snorting like a dork. Javier pinches the bridge of his nose at the idiocy. “Especially freshman.”

Javier leans against the locker, his face now screwing in confusion. “Who are y’all talking about?” Walking over to sit next to Daniel, fixing his shoes. He never really cared to get into that whole locker-room talk. It was all a bit juvenile, and he had a girl-

Daniel grins, “The freshman, Andrea- one with big lips- she’s a cherry but sure as hell could kiss”

 Javier didn’t expect to react the way he did, he didn’t expect to feel so much anger. So much anger at just a sentence. Just him using his crooked smile to utter your name bothered him, let alone the subject matter. Andrea, you had been someone he spent so much yet so little time with but so stupidly spent so much time aimlessly worrying about. He worried about you too much. Especially after new years. Your face solemn and full of tears. He never wanted to see that again and he secretly promised himself if he ever made you cry he’d punish himself endlessly.

Crossing his arms Javier speaks in the calmest way he can, “Alright. Don’t talk about her like that” It was the calmest way, but with the look on Daniels face he knew his version of calm may be a bit different. It was a shocked one before a face of inquisition forming on his rat like face.

Javier was unfazed, with his face being dead serious. Daniel nods slowly with an approving smile his tongue rolling against his cheek, “Oh- I’ve seen you two in the hall, she’s your friends sister right?” He laughs and the minions laugh as well. In that moment Javier had felt nearly as violent as the night at the bar. Javier gets up, knowing if he stayed in that room he was going to be in the back of a cop car. Wont be the best look for him since he has plans of driving one in a few months. That would be regrettable.

But seeing their faces and replaying the things they had said before he knew it was about Andrea was enough. At that point he didn’t give a fuck about regret. “I’m just saying, she’s a good girl and if I catch you talking about her again-i’ll break your jaw.” He spits, his voice intimidating but not nearly as dominant as his broad presence alone. The air in the room shifting to quiet and dull, the boys with shut mouths-shits not funny now huh? Javier gives Daniels stupid face one more look before exiting the locker room.

His fists flexing at his side, walking off the anger rising in his chest. 

Javier couldn’t help but ask you about Daniel when he saw you in the hall. He felt a sick feeling in his stomach that he wrote off as disappointment in you but it was probably something else.  

Maybe his dad was right, he really was going to struggle when you get a boyfriend. You had been in his life for so long, he met you when you were just a girl in pigtails and hearing you being talked about in such a vulgar way…

It was a new feeling he wasn’t ready to address.

Your cheeks were rosy from coming out of gym, it reminded him of two summers ago-the summer before his year in Houston. How you guys would bike a lot more than get into trouble in his basement. You would yell at the rest for going too fast and Javier would slow down to be at your side while Genie and Frankie would race.

You been a bit distant since New Years. And it’s been driving him crazy. He couldn’t stop thinking about you being alone the second the ball dropped, probably looking for him while they were all distracted-and for that person to take advantage of that moment. Javi felt ill after dropping you off at home, wanting to go back to the bar and really give the creep what he deserved.

You confirmed that you did in fact hook up and an familiar feeling came about, the one different from disappointment. “What. Did. He. Say.” You demand and Javier can’t help but smile at how determined you were to hear the things he didn’t want to repeat. And your lips were big, he guesses he never really noticed. He hadn’t noticed because your smile usually thinned them out, your were always smiling. Especially around him, that didn’t go unnoticed for Javier. Not at all. “Tell me.”

Your tone changes and shamefully, Javier feel his blood rush. You can tell from Javier’s face dropping in that moment.

Fuck this.

Javier repeats the vulgarity, and he sees that it frustrates you, even before he explained what a “cherry” was. Javier tried to explain that he didn’t just let them talk about you, especially not with him around. He would never let that happen, he didn’t say it out right but he wished you knew that. He could tell that him being away-him dating Lorraine-he could tell you felt like you were in an awkward position, like you felt like he wasn’t truly your friend.

And it frustrated him. He couldn’t stop thinking about your face before parting ways at the gym door. Your doe eyed look, like you were holding back. And maybe he was too.

“Javi?” Lorraine’s hands flattened over his arm and centered him back to earth. Javi looks to her again; her dark brows made her dirty blonde hair look lighter. She always looked at him like she was in need of something more from him. It was the root of the most of their arguments. He blinks a few times wondering what he was talking about again.

“Will you move with me to Houston?” He blurts before the thought fully develops in his brain. The thought ran through him for a second a few minutes prior before the words came up in his throat. Shock in his body, he was shocked at his own request.

Surprisingly, she isn’t shocked herself. She smiles from ear to ear and Javier feels like he could be sick. Move with me? Are we even that serious? I can’t just say never mind. 

Sorry Lorraine, I was thinking about Andrea so I accidentally asked you to move with me to a whole other part of the state.

Oh my god, there’s tears in her eyes.

“Of course.” She gleams and nearly hops over the console to pull him close. Kissing him, kissing him again. His eyes open and in shock at his question, in shock that she accepts so quickly

You hadn’t known that Javier was dropping out for the police academy, you also didn’t know he was moving away with his girlfriend of 4 months. You were oblivious to it all while Javi and Lorraine planned their lives in secret. Lorraine was a senior and had planned to go to a college in Houston anyway, she was over the moon with the idea that she gets to be alongside Javier.

You had been quite oblivious despite Javier suddenly asking you to come over more often- “Chucho misses you.” you would oblige but always take someone along, being alone with Javier and Lorraine felt a bit too much at times. You kind of hoped that being around him and Lorraine would make you like him less, but you were doomed because for some crazy reason it made you want him more. It was almost every day that you stayed at his house.

He had even showed up to your first lacrosse game. It wasn’t your most attractive look in a collared shirt and pleated skirt, completely sweat through, chasing down the field. Fuck why did girls’ lacrosse sticks have to be so much harder to cradle.

Javier and Lorraine’s voices were the loudest ones from the stands, “ANDREA PUSH HER?!” Their voices mix from the bleachers up the hill. You try your best not to get distracted as you mercilessly hit the girl on the opposing team with your stick before driving the ball into the net. Shocked at the score and the fact that your ball stayed in its place. You’d be a fool to say you hadn’t tried harder because he was there.

Ridiculous and unserious screams from the bleachers.

Later, Monica squeezes water into your mouth after the win. She twisted her ankle two days before the start of the season, it was unfortunate, but she had run around the team limping as a personal coach to every girl. “Javier is literally in love with you.” You furrow your brows, cheeks full of water before swallowing. Shaking your head in disapproval.

Despite your multiple efforts to rid the crippling infatuation with Javier it truly only grew deeper. Every hang out he was sweeter, kinder and stared at you longer. It drove you mad. And honestly you just wished he’d leave you alone, maybe the crush would pass. Of course, hooking up with people didn’t help either. You would regret it the next day and, in the hall, Javier would complain about it. “You have to choose men more wisely Drea.” You mimic his baritone voice in your head.

The only “wise” choice you wanted was the one you couldn’t have.

You focus back on Monica, wiping your mouth dripping with water. “Him and Lorraine are practically married at this point.” Your own choice of words causing you to wince. God, would you have to attend their wedding? Are you going to have to watch him live his life out, without you?

Monica laughs, her classic snort falling from her. “You’re probably right, I’m just trying to feed your delusion.” Her words do not come as a comfort-but as everything but that- like a stab wound. You push her playfully and scoff. Javier in his tight pants and boots walks down the hill to meet you post game. You wipe the sweat at your hairline off quickly, smelling yourself as he looks back to see if his girlfriend was following. Your nose screwing for a second.

Whelp, you could smell worse.

Monica mutters something about the bride and groom approaching. You can’t help but want to push her and break her other ankle so that she has to get wheeled around school. Javier’s smile is bright, his eyes doing the thing. “You’re a beast Andrea” He compliments, and you were already giggling like an idiot. You could feel Monica’s judging eyes. You shrug as if scoring 2 points was nothing for you, it was a big deal-even if the other school was absolutely horrible.

He shoves your shoulder and Lorraine squeezes your other sweaty arm. “My gosh-I wish I had a video camera at that moment, freshman scoring in her first varsity game.” Her dimples deepen. A shy smile forms on your face at her sentiment, You looked at the two of them. They were so good together.

Perfect.

 Even if today you decided to cut them from my life- you would never get to escape them. They were the talk of the town, surprised they didn’t have a camera crew following them around An-American-Family-style. You give an appreciative nod to the couple, which they assumed was because of the compliment they just gave but it was a nod of understanding.

Understanding that you never really belonged. Not with Javier or in a relationship as good as that. You needed that understanding; he had loved her and despite you loving him-nothing will change that simple fact of him loving her.

[all-the-things-2020]

No Better Place - Chapter 19

Summary: Cassidy breaks up with Javi and he throws himself into his work.

Word count: 3700

Cassidy woke late the next morning, Linus pawing at her face to tell her that his breakfast was late. She’d forgotten to switch on her alarm and it was nearly seven. She jumped up, shoved her feet into her boots and dumped a can of cat food into Linus’ dish before running out to the barn.

“Sorry, kids,” she said, as the horses all snorted at her. Even Cricket was impatient, kicking a hoof against the door of her stall. Cassidy tore open a bale of hay and started stuffing hay nets. Once she’d hung the fresh hay up in the stalls, she carefully measured out each horse’s grain and supplements. Cricket just got a few pellets to supplement her hay, since she was an easy keeper, but Buster and the mares needed to put on some weight, and they got pellets, grain and some supplements. Nugget was still on stall rest, so she fed him lightly, but he did get some grain mixed with his medications.

Once she’d hung the feed buckets in the stalls, she pulled, dumped, washed and refilled the water buckets. Only then did she head back to the house to pee and brush her teeth. As she entered the bathroom, she saw the pregnancy test sitting on the counter and the emotions of the night before came crashing down on her. She picked it up and threw it angrily into the trash can. She used the toilet, brushed her teeth and then decided to take a shower. She looked horrible. Her eyes were puffy from crying and her hair was a tangled mess.

The shower revived her a bit, and she managed a cup of coffee and a slice of toast before her throat threatened to close up again. “What am I going to do?” she asked Linus, who was sitting in the chair beside her, very helpfully cleaning his back legs.

It was clear that it was over between her and Javi but how to end it? Should she confront him about the woman in his apartment? Or just break things off? One thing was certain, she did not want to see him again. It would be too painful, and there was always the chance she’d lose her nerve once she was face to face with him. She’d had many opportunities to leave Travis that she left untaken just because he’d given her that grin. She wouldn’t give Javi the chance.

She could wait until he called, probably that night or the next, but what if he didn’t call and just drove down on Friday night or Saturday morning, showing up unannounced? “I’ll call him,” she told Linus. “After I know he’s left for work. I’ll leave a message on his answering machine and that’ll be that.” Linus looked up from his grooming, the tip of his tongue poking out of his mouth, bright pink and ridiculous. Cassidy sighed. “Then I’ll just have to deal with Chucho, but he should be easy enough to avoid.”

**************************************************************************

The next day was better, but Javi was still subdued as he went about his work. He would have worked through lunch again, except Monica forced him to walk to the deli down the street with her and a few other people. He ate half his roast beef sandwich and promised her he’d have the rest for dinner.

When he got home, he tossed the sandwich into the fridge and took off his jacket and tie. He flipped through the mail (all junk or bills, nothing interesting) and noticed the blinking red light on his answering machine. It was probably a telemarketer, trying to sell him insurance or a timeshare or some such nonsense. He pressed the play button, fully expecting to erase the message within the first few seconds.

“Hey, Javi, it’s Cassidy,” the tinny voice said. The speaker on this machine is crap, Javi thought. I need to get a better one. “Um, I don’t really know how to say this other than to just say it. I … I can’t do this anymore. It’s over, Javi. It’s not working and I feel like you need to focus on your life there in San Antonio. And I need to focus on my life here. I’ve been letting too much slide and I’m sure you have too and … well, I just think it’s best we end it now before things get out of hand. Goodbye, Javi. And good luck.”

He was stunned. He’d thought things were going well. True, he’d missed the last two weekends, but he’d been swamped at work and Cassidy had seemed to understand. He picked up the phone and dialed her number. After five rings, her machine picked up.

“It’s Javi,” he said. “Cassidy, pick up if you’re there.” He paused for several seconds, then went on. “Okay, I guess you’re out in the barn. Call me when you get back in. Please, Cassidy. Let’s talk about this.”

He hung up and fetched a beer from the fridge. He drank it and opened another one. Halfway through the second beer, he pulled the sandwich out of the fridge and ate a few bites. Finally, he couldn’t stand it anymore and he called her again.

“Hey, Cassidy,” he said when the machine picked up. “Come on, baby, talk to me. I don’t know what happened. Did I do something? Did I not do something? Tell me how I can make things right. I don’t want to lose you, Cassidy. I love you. So, call me back. Please.”

He turned on the television and watched some ridiculous sitcoms until ten, when a police procedural came on. He switched channels to a medical drama. Still no call from Cassidy. Before he went to bed, he called one last time.

“Cassidy, sweetheart, please, please, call me back. I don’t want it to be over. We can make this work. I’ll make sure I get home every goddamned weekend, baby, I’ll call you every night. Whatever you need to know that I’m one hundred percent committed to this relationship.” He sighed. “Okay, it’s late, I’m going to bed. I’ll call you again when I get home tomorrow, if you don’t call me first. I love you, hermosa.”

He got undressed and crawled into bed, but sleep eluded him for hours as he wracked his brain trying to figure out what could have triggered Cassidy’s decision to end their relationship. It just didn’t make sense.

********************************************************************

“You look like hell,” Monica said the next morning as soon as she saw him. “I know this thing with Andre is …”

He cut her off. “Cassidy broke up with me,” he said curtly as he dug in his desk drawer for a new pen. The one he’d been using kept skipping.

“What?” Monica plopped down in the chair he kept in the corner. “No way.”

He nodded wearily. “Yes,” he said. “There was a message on my answering machine when I got home yesterday. I called her back several times, but she’s screening her calls or something. I left messages …” He closed his eyes. “Look, I appreciate your concern, but I have a shitload of work to do and I’m sure you do, too. If I need to talk, you’re the first person I’ll come to, I promise.”

Monica bit her lower lip, clearly wanting to say more, but respecting his wishes. “Okay,” she said after a moment. “But I’m making sure you take your lunch again today. Nobody starves on my watch, no matter how bad life gets.” She stood up and tilted her head. “I know this week has been a clusterfuck, Javi, but you’ll get through it.” She smiled at him and left, pulling his office door halfway closed, giving him at least a modicum of privacy.

Javi opened the file on his desk and stared at the page. It was going to be a very long day.

**********************************************************************

There was another message on his answering machine when he got home. It was short and to the point. “Javier, please, stop calling. There’s nothing you can do. I’ve made my decision. It’s over between us. I’m sorry.”

The click at the end of her message had a finality about it that made Javi’s stomach clench. He took a few deep breaths and then dialed his father.

“She what?” Chucho shouted as soon as Javi had told him about Cassidy’s messages.

“She broke up with me,” Javi repeated. “Can you talk to her for me, Dad? She won’t pick up when I call and she asked me to stop calling. I don’t know what happened, but maybe she’ll tell you, or you can figure it out. I don’t know what to do, Dad.” He choked back a sob. He’d be damned if he’d cry in front of his father, even if it was over the phone.

“Of course,” Chucho said. “I’ll go over there tomorrow and ask her what the hell’s going on.” He snorted. “I’ll knock some sense into that girl’s head.”

“Don’t yell at her,” Javi pleaded. “Just … just talk to her, see if she’ll talk to me.” He sighed. “I knew she had misgivings about trying to make a long distance relationship work but I thought she was over it. I guess not.” He shook his head. “I’ll let you go, but thanks in advance for anything you can do.”

“You hang in there, mijo,” Chucho said. “I’ll try to fix this.”

******************************************************

“No,” Cassidy said firmly. Chucho was in the barn aisle and she was inside the tack room, the half closed door making a sort of barrier between then. “I don’t have anything to say to him. I thought about things and I realized that it’s not going to work. End of story.” She hoped Chucho couldn’t tell that her voice was about to crack. She turned away to fiddle with the bridles that were already hanging neatly on their rack.

“Cassidy,” Chucho sighed. “I don’t know why you have such a crazy idea stuck in your head, but please, promise me you’ll at least consider talking to Javi. He’s broken hearted.”

I’ll bet, she thought, unable to get the image of that woman leading him back inside his apartment out of her head. “If I change my mind, I certainly will call him,” she said, “but I don’t see that happening. I’m sorry, Chucho, but I can’t handle this long distance thing. And before you even think about it, I can’t move to San Antonio. I’m not a city girl and you know it.” She looked up at him. “Javi belongs in the city and I belong out here. Those are the facts. It sucks but it’s true.”

Chucho shook his head. “I still think you’re making a huge mistake, mija, but it’s your decision. I’ll tell Javi what you said and he won’t bother you again. And neither will I.” He turned and walked out of the barn, his shoulders slumped.

It broke Cassidy’s heart to see how this had affected Chucho, but she wasn’t about to tell him the truth, that she’d caught his son cheating on her. Let him think Javi was a decent man as long as possible. She was sure that once Javi had accepted that things were over between them, he’d tell his dad about this other woman. Unless she was just another one night stand, in which case, Chucho need never know.

********************************************************************

Javi hung up the phone. He’d hoped his dad could get through to Cassidy, but she’d proven just as stubborn with him as she’d been with Javi. He glanced at his watch. It was only eight thirty; plenty of time for a run to the liquor store for more whiskey and cigarettes. There was no reason to stop smoking now. If he was honest with himself, the only thing keeping him from getting stinking drunk was the need to be in the office the next day, the need to do everything he could to make sure none of the other kids in the program ended up like Andre.

Monica wisely avoided him the next morning, even though he was sure she wanted to lecture him on his rumpled clothes and the pack of cigarettes displayed prominently on his desk. She merely shook her head a little as he headed outside for a smoke break before their weekly meeting with the chief of police. He knew she was disappointed in him, but Javi didn’t give a damn. He was going to wallow in his misery as long as he could, knowing that if he went off the deep end, Monica would haul his butt back to shore.

He threw himself into his work, getting to the office at seven and often staying until eight o’clock or even later. He took work home on the weekends and started carrying a pager, letting everyone know he was only a phone call away. He even gave his number to some of the higher risk kids, telling them they could call any time of the day or night if they needed to talk. He spent more than one long night on the phone with Carlos or Leticia or Martin, doing his best to listen and not judge. If they made it to the next morning without using or running with their crew, he counted it a win. He worked with their schools to arrange for extra tutoring hours to keep them off the streets. He even forked over money for baby formula when Mom’s child support payment was late or gas money so a dad could make it to a job interview. He loaned out several of his ties for job interviews and taught a dozen boys how to tie a Windsor knot.

Every night, when he finally made it home, he poured a few fingers of whiskey, smoked far too many cigarettes, and ate junk that would make Monica cringe. The apartment was just a place to catch a few hours of sleep, take a shower, and maybe watch a movie on the VCR to escape reality for a while. Work was his life and it was all that kept him going.

Thanksgiving came and Javi told Chucho he had to work the day before and the day after, so there was no point in driving all the way to Laredo. While the police department never shut down, his department had been given Friday as a paid holiday as well as Thanksgiving Day, but Javi declined to tell Chucho this. He reluctantly joined Monica and her family at Rob’s mother’s place for Thanksgiving Dinner, but left as soon as he politely could.

“Stay for a while,” Rob pleaded. “Watch the game with us.”

“Thanks, man, but this is your family,” Javi replied. “You don’t need me bringing you all down. I’ll be okay.”

Monica pressed a paper plate of leftovers wrapped in foil into his hands. “Do not work tomorrow,” she said firmly. Javi couldn’t lie to her, so he didn’t answer. They both knew full well he’d taken home a stack of paperwork to keep himself occupied over the long weekend.

It was harder to avoid going home for Christmas, but Javi was saved at the last minute by a torrential storm that brought rain and hail and even brief flurries of sleet, leading to the closure of many highways and a flash flood outside Laredo that washed out the road that led to Chucho’s ranch.

“You might as well stay put, son,” he said on the phone. “By the time they get the roads cleared, you’ll be due back at work. You can come down and pick up your present later.” Javi promised to do just that, even though he and Chucho both knew he was lying. He hadn’t been home in months.

They did talk on the phone, though. Their conversations were stilted as they carefully avoided talking about Cassidy. Chucho mentioned seeing her around town now and then, but he was casual about it, mixing news of her in with the usual gossip about other people that Javi knew. She was working part time at the feed store, having taken over for Jenny the cashier, who was on maternity leave. Chucho also mentioned that someone had seen Cassidy working as a bagger at the grocery store, but he couldn’t confirm since it wasn’t the store he frequented. Dr. Hamblin mentioned in passing that Nugget was still not sound enough to ride, but Cassidy refused to sell him, for fear he’d end up at the slaughterhouse.

Hamblin had been on the ranch to treat Buster for a small abscess in his hind foot, the result of a stone bruise sustained while chasing a particularly obstinate cow through a gully. Cassidy had trailered him over to Chucho’s a couple of days after the breakup and sent Javi a formal letter stating that he should start paying his boarding fees to his father instead of her. Luis was riding him every few days and sang his praises every time he slid out of the saddle. Chucho joked that he was going to give him to Luis if Javi didn’t get his butt down there, but even though he missed the horse, Javi knew he couldn’t look at him without thinking of Cassidy, so he stayed away.

A few days after New Year’s, Monica dragged herself into Javi’s office. “You look horrible,” he said without thinking. It was true. Despite having a three year old and a five year old at home, she was always put together. On this day, she had no makeup on and looked pale.

“Hold that thought,” she said, dashing out of the room. When she came back a few minutes later, it was clear she’d thrown up.

“Hungover?” Javi asked. He’d never seen her drink more than one beer or glass of wine, so he was surprised.

“Morning sickness,” she mumbled, folding herself into the chair in the corner. “I told Rob to get a vasectomy, since the insurance company wouldn’t let me get my tubes tied, but he wouldn’t listen. So, we’re having number three.” She smiled weakly. “And I’m not letting him touch me again until he does get the snip-snip. Three kids is more than enough.”

“Congratulations, I guess,” Javi said, suppressing a laugh. “Is Rob freaking out?”

“Oh, at first he was all Mister Macho,” she said. “Then I reminded him he gets to take care of the little rug rat on top of the other two and that sobered him up quickly enough.” She leaned forward. “I didn’t come here to throw up on you, I promise. I wanted to show you something.”

She handed him a brochure. The cover featured a photo of a small boy with Down Syndrome on the back of a horse, smiling broadly. The words Blue Ridge Equine Therapy and Horse Rescue were at the top of the page.

“Nice,” Javi said. “But I don’t understand.”

Monica nodded at the brochure. “They mostly do kids with disabilities, developmental and physical issues, but the woman who runs it said she’d be open to doing some psychological therapy, too. I know you said working with your horse helped you with your depression after you quit the DEA. I was wondering if you think something like this could fit into our program.”

Javi flipped the brochure open. Photos of smiling children riding horses and brushing horses were scattered among paragraphs describing how the charity rescued horses from abusive homes and auctions where they were vulnerable to being sold to slaughterhouses. They retrained the horses and either adopted them out or used them in their therapy program in conjunction with a local hospital’s pediatric department.

Monica got out of her chair and came to stand beside him. She laid her hand on his shoulder. “I know it probably reminds you of Cassidy,” she said quietly, “which is why I didn’t bring it up sooner, but I think it might help our kids. Mary Sue -- yeah, that’s her real name -- said they could help with the new intake horses, get them used to being groomed and handled without being afraid, and then they could assist with the therapy sessions. They have volunteers who lead the horses around, others who help the kids get on and off the horses, stuff like that. There are physical therapists who are in charge of the actual therapy but they concentrate on the kids. Our kids could focus on the horses.”

Javi nodded. “Yeah, yeah, I think it’s worth looking into,” he said. “Set up a meeting with her and I’ll find out what kind of funding we might be able to get.” He leaned back in his chair. “If we can get some of these kids out of the city, even one day a week, show them there’s more to the world than their neighborhood and the mall, it’ll help us help them.”

Monica squeezed his shoulder. “Good,” she said. “I was afraid you’d be resistant … that it might remind you too much of …”

He laid his hand on top of hers, cutting her off. “I’m fine,” he lied. “And you’re right, I know first hand how helpful working with horses can be for mental health. I’d like to get a list of the kids in the program who have the most severe psychological issues, offer this to them first.”

“You got it, boss,” she said. “I’ll set up a meeting with Mary Sue and get that list to you as soon as I can. If I can get back to my office without barfing again.” She laid her hand against her stomach. “Don’t take this personally, Javi, but men suck.”

After she left, Javi took a few minutes to stare at the brochure again. He carefully traced the horse’s head in the cover photo. It was a dark bay, very much like Buster. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then shoved the brochure into his desk drawer and went back to the report he was typing up on the computer.

[seitmai]

Riding to Bartlesville with Javi isn’t half bad, he’s more than willing to share the endless supply of snacks he’s got stashed all over the vehicle. You rummage through the glovebox, pushing away a questionable-looking melted bar of chocolate for a package of Skittles.

Nothing better than road trip snacks 😌

You flash him a grin and place your other foot beside the first. Javi sighs in annoyance but extends his hand, waving his fingers expectantly. You sift through the bag and hand him the green Skittles. Despite the years that have passed from when he was a fresh-faced Corporal with a buzzcut and you were a civilian contractor feeling way out of your depth, you appreciate this part of your relationship remains unchanged.

Snack tax is one thing that is constant in a longlasting friendship 🤞🏻

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you reply, though your tone lacks any real bite. “But I do love a little flattery,” Tyler counters, extending his arm toward you. 

God he is such a flirt

“I can pay for myself,” you insist, digging through your purse but he’s faster, dropping $10 on the counter. “A fake date is still a date.” He tells you. 

Like a true Southern gentleman 🤭😌

“Look up here,” Tyler says, waiting patiently until you meet his gaze before continuing. “Don’t overthink it — just feel it” “That’s easy for you to say,” you mutter.  “So let’s keep that big brain busy. Tell me about yourself. Did you go to a fancy school like MIT too?” He asks, his tone playful.

I love that he not only wants to keep her brain busy but truly want to get to know her a little better too 🥰

Despite the smoky bar and the crowd of people, all you smell is Tyler's clean, crisp scent. It reminds you of the first storm of the season, the air electric and charged with energy. Full of potential. 

Clean scent = best scent

Tyler stares steadily at you as he continues to move you across the floor, and you find yourself unable to look away from him. The music seems to fade, leaving only the sound of his breathing and your own. Your lashes flutter and you close your eyes, allowing yourself to simply feel — weightless and free. 

👀🤭

“It wasn’t,” you agree. “But Scott didn’t show up.” Tyler presses his lips together, his gaze falling away to look at something past you. His nostrils flare and then his eyes return to you, but the tension in his jaw remains. "You had fun, didn't you?" He prods.

He's so right about this!! Fuck Scott, let's just have a great evening!!

On the Horizon (2/?)

Summary: You've been pining over your coworker for a while now. He might not have realized but someone has.  Pairing:Tyler Owens x F!Reader (with minor Scott x F!Reader) Word Count: 4.3K  Rating: Mature, 18+ only. Angst and asshole!Scott who brings a side of gaslighting. Future chapters will be smutty. Not all themes are tagged.   A/N: Thanks to @writercole for the summary and @ryebecca @mermaidxatxheart @clairewritesandrambles and @a-reader-and-a-writer for their beta help.

Please comment or reblog if you enjoyed this and want to see more. Or scream at me in my www inbox. That always makes my day.

Part 1 ♡ Masterlist

The sound of the rickety old air conditioning unit sputtering to life jolts you awake. You roll over with a groan, throwing an arm over your face to shield yourself from the sunlight trickling in through a gap in the curtains. It takes you a long moment to realize the other side of the bed is empty and cold. When you do, the remnants of sleep scatter, a wave of awareness washing over you.

You tuck your chin against your chest and pull the scratchy sheets closer to your naked body. The old clock on the bedside table stares back at you as you struggle to ignore the hollow ache in your stomach. You didn’t expect Scott to stay the night. Both of you knew it wouldn’t be smart, though it still stings, just like it did the first time. But that was Scott, you remind yourself, always thinking two steps ahead, anticipating and reacting. Whatever you two had needed to remain a secret. As he reminded you last night, when it came to sleeping with a coworker, people were always harsher on the woman. It was better this way. Wasn’t it?

You close your eyes and draw in a pained breath, catching the faint, musky scent of Scott’s cologne that still lingers in the sheets. The smell brings a rush of memories from the night before, vivid and overwhelming, like a sense memory that refuses to fade. The way his long, thick fingers curled inside you. The sound of his shuddering breath when he came. 

Your phone buzzes, and you jerk upright, expecting or perhaps hoping to see Scott’s name. Instead, it's Andy letting you know he’s grabbing coffee for everyone. You thank him and, without giving yourself a chance to second-guess yourself, shoot off a message to Scott. You watch as the status changes from “Delivered,” to “Read at 7:22 AM.” You wait for a reply but minutes tick by without an answer.

Eventually, you force yourself out of bed and prepare for the day, but as you move through your routine, your mind keeps drifting back to the unanswered message. It’s after 8 a.m. by the time you leave the hotel room with your duffle bag in hand. Outside, the parking lot is full of other storm chasers who mill around quietly, their mood more subdued than last night.

You find Scott with a clipboard in hand, talking with Javi. He spares you a glance but doesn’t otherwise acknowledge you. It’s not personal, you remind yourself, feeling better when you remember you're both assigned to Scarecrow. You’ll have a chance to talk with him then without having to worry about anyone overhearing you. 

On the way to the car, you catch up with Andy, looking dubiously at the greyish cup of gas station coffee he hands you. It's been weeks since you had a decent cup. You're half-busy lamenting the absence of Starbucks when a sharp whistle catches your attention. It's Tyler, and he’s giving you a curious look, raising his chin in Scott's direction. 

You know what he's asking. You should give him a thumbs-up so he knows the ploy worked, but before you can a sharp, unexpected wave of shame crawls up your throat. Tyler wrinkles his brow, hands on his hips. When he takes a step forward you turn away without answering him. You head for your assigned car, only to stop abruptly when you see Peter, one of the meteorologists, sitting in the passenger seat with the door ajar.

“Morning. I think you might be in the wrong car,” you say. 

“Hey,” Peter greets, looking up from his computer. “Scott changed the rotation. You’re riding with Javi. Didn’t he tell you?”

“Oh.” You stare at your coworker unblinking, for a long moment. It was probably an oversight. Scott was so busy. "O-of course he did, I must have forgotten," you lie, forcing yourself to chuckle. “Lack of sleep,” you explain.

“Tell me about it. These motel beds are killing my back.”

“For sure,” you agree, offering him a wave and promising to catch up with him later. The second you turn away, your eyes sting and you brush at them angrily. Why are you crying? It’s not even a big deal. You liked riding with Javi, everyone did even though he was the boss. 

You head in the opposite direction of the others, unsure of where you’re going. All you know is that you need to move to dislodge the pressure in your chest. It’s only when you reach the edge of the motel’s property, standing at the boundary of the farm next door, that you finally stop. You drop your bag, sending up a small cloud of dust, and press a hand to your mouth as you stare across the field of knee-high corn. This was all so stupid, a childish overreaction. There’d be time to talk with Scott tonight again. You were getting upset over nothing.

You have only a few precious seconds to collect yourself before you hear footsteps approaching. Quickly, you scrub your hands over your eyes, trying to dry the tears as best as you can. It doesn’t matter who it is; you just don’t want to be seen like this.

“You know, sweetheart,” Tyler begins, his southern drawl softening the endearment, “I’m not used to chasing after a woman.” 

He stops a few feet away, his gaze fixed steadily on the horizon. You watch him out of the corner of your eye, his cowboy hat shading his expression from view. He's not exactly who you want to talk to at the moment but it was better than someone from your team. 

“Well," you start, clearing your throat to dislodge the unwanted emotion from your voice. "You’re welcome for the unique experience, I guess."

He turns to face you, a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth. You’ve amused him.  “Well, don’t keep me in suspense,” he says, clearly waiting for you to elaborate.

You open your mouth but nothing comes out. Scott spent the night and that was what you wanted so why didn’t it feel that way? 

“Ah, he shit the bed, huh?” Tyler asks, understandingly. Your nose wrinkles at the euphemism and this time he laughs. “Well, we can always try again tonight.”

You realize then that Tyler thinks nothing happened between you and Scott last night. You should set him straight, but instead, you find yourself saying, “You don’t even know where we’re going.”

“Come on now. We both know everyone here is heading up to Bartlesville. The conditions look promising.” 

“What do you have planned to help me?”

Tyler tilts his cowboy hat up with a finger, stepping close enough that you find yourself beneath its brim. You look up at him and notice, for the first time, the dark stubble along his jaw and the dimples that appear when he smiles. You’ve always known he was handsome — everyone knew it, mostly because that was all Peter talked about after enough beers. But right now, it feels like you’re seeing Tyler Owens for the first time.

“You leave that up to me. Just be ready by 7 p.m. Wear that dress from last night.”

He steps away and you feel like you can breathe again. “Okay.” You agree.

“Okay?” he questions. “They don’t teach you manners up north?” He teases.

His comment catches you off guard and startles a genuine laugh from you, the first one you’ve had in a while, you realize. “Thank you,” you reply sincerely. 

Just like last night, Tyler taps your nose playfully and steps back. “7 p.m.,” he reminds you before he turns and heads off.

You don’t even notice it until you’re back at the truck, but the pressure in your chest that’s been weighing on you all morning is gone.

–

Riding to Bartlesville with Javi isn’t half bad, he’s more than willing to share the endless supply of snacks he’s got stashed all over the vehicle. You rummage through the glovebox, pushing away a questionable-looking melted bar of chocolate for a package of Skittles.

“So, you gonna tell me what last night was all about?” He asks.

You freeze, anxiety skittering up your spine. Does he know about you and Scott?

“Javi, I —”

“Tyler Owens?” he presses. “I saw you with his crew last night, and Scott mentioned he was bothering you this morning.”

At the mention of Scott’s name, there’s a familiar, painful tug in your chest. You ignore it, just like you do with the knowledge that Scott saw you and Tyler together. You don’t want to think about him right now.

“Are you asking as my friend or as my boss?” You question, propping your foot on the dashboard and tossing a Skittle into your mouth.  

“As your friend I want to make sure you’re being safe. And as your boss, I wanna know why you’re spending time with the competition,” he says. “Also, take your damn foot off the dash.”

You flash him a grin and place your other foot beside the first. Javi sighs in annoyance but extends his hand, waving his fingers expectantly. You sift through the bag and hand him the green Skittles. Despite the years that have passed from when he was a fresh-faced Corporal with a buzzcut and you were a civilian contractor feeling way out of your depth, you appreciate this part of your relationship remains unchanged.

“He was looking for some contouring tips.” You joke, earning another look. “He wanted to know where we were headed next,” you tell him, surprising yourself with how easy the lie comes to you.”Don’t worry, I told him we were going to Broken Bow.”

“He’s gonna meet us in Bartlesville, isn’t he?”

“Oh, absolutely,” you agree, rummaging through the Skittles bag to find another handful of green ones. “Does he really bother you that much?”

Javi shrugs, his expression thoughtful as he takes the Skittles from you. “He’s annoying and disruptive, but…not really, I guess. We’re still getting good data when he isn’t shooting fireworks into tornadoes.”

You laugh. “Peter loved that. He kept showing clips to everyone. I think it was the highlight of his week.”

“Yeah, how about you? You like Tyler Owens, too?”

You raise an eyebrow, a touch of exasperation in your voice. “Javi…”

“What?” he asks innocently, his gaze meeting yours. “It’s just a question.”

“Okay, if we’re just asking questions, how’s Kate doing?”

Javi shifts uncomfortably in his seat, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel as he avoids your eyes. “You really shouldn’t be asking your boss personal questions like that.”

“Mmmm, okay,” you reply.

For as long as you’ve known Javi, Kate’s been a topic of conversation. It wasn’t until recently that he reconnected with her, though, flying off to New York to recruit her for the team. She turned him down but texted him sporadically. It was clear to you he was painfully in love with her.

“We’re texting again,” Javi admits finally. "And she agreed to go to dinner when I'm in New York again next week," he reveals with a smile. 

“Look at you go,” you encourage. 

“Don’t make it a big deal,” he says, reaching over to fiddle with the radio. 

Static bursts through a second later before it’s replaced by a soft, crooning voice. You settle back in your seat when you sense Javi’s done talking about the Kate situation. Based on the radar, you know it’s best to catch some sleep while you can. You close your eyes and tilt your head towards the sunlight streaming through the side window, letting the warmth wash over you. Tension drains from your body as you drift off to sleep, listening to Javi sing off-tune to the radio.  

–

At exactly 7 p.m., there’s a knock on your door. You open it to see Tyler standing there, leaning casually against the doorframe, cowboy hat tipped low. He’s wearing a pearl snap shirt and sporting an impressively large belt buckle.

“My eyes are up here, sweetheart,” Tyler reminds you with a smirk. Your cheeks heat as you meet his gaze, feeling slightly embarrassed. “It says ‘Tornado Wrangler.’ Just in case you were too distracted to read it.”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you reply, though your tone lacks any real bite.

“But I do love a little flattery,” Tyler counters, extending his arm toward you. 

After a moment of hesitation, you slip your hand around his bicep, allowing yourself to be guided along. The parking lot is quiet. It seems that the weekend storm chasers have all gone home. There’s only one solitary figure in the distance, their cigarette glowing briefly with an orange flare in the darkness. Most of the motel rooms you pass are dark and you wonder if everyone on your team has gone to the bar Peter suggested in the group text. 

“Where are we going?” You ask.

“Only the finest establishment Bartlesville has to offer,” he replies.

“So the bar everyone else is headed to.”

“You city girls,” he says with a shake of his head. “Come on now,” he encourages, pulling you with him as he sprints across the road to another parking lot that’s crowded and brightly lit. 

The neon letters flashing above the entrance proclaim that you've arrived at Cowboys’ Dancehall. As you and Tyler approach, you both hand over your IDs to the bouncer stationed outside. He scrutinizes the out-of-state licenses for a long moment before waving you on. 

Inside, it’s loud and dimly lit. Couples spin around the dance floor to a fast-paced country song. The bar is crowded, but Tyler cuts through the throng of people with ease, keeping you beside him with a hand at your hip until you reach the old wooden bar. When he leans in to speak to the bartender his chest brushes your back.

“I’ll take a Bud Light, and the lady will have a rosé,” he tells her, his voice raised just enough to be heard over the music.

The bartender, an older woman with deep lines etched into her face, stares at Tyler before she pops the caps off two Bud Lights and slides them across the bar. “That’ll be $7 even,” she announces.

You press your hand to your mouth, stifling a laugh at the exchange.

“Well alright,” Tyler says, reaching for his wallet.

“I can pay for myself,” you insist, digging through your purse but he’s faster, dropping $10 on the counter. 

“A fake date is still a date.” He tells you. 

You’re relieved to escape the crush of the crowded bar as you make your way past the dance floor toward the quieter back area where tables are scattered. Peter spots you first, his face lighting up when he waves you over enthusiastically. You’re taken aback to see most of your coworkers seated at a table with Tyler’s crew. Boone greets you with a lopsided salute, while Lily gives you a fist bump. Tyler pulls out a chair for you, and you take a seat, distracted as you search the room for a familiar face.

“Don’t worry,” Peter half shouts to you over the table. “Javi and Scott are meeting with that investor guy.”

“Oh,” you respond, nodding and wondering just how often your coworkers hung out with Tyler’s team in Scott and Javi’s absence.

You were never one to go out with them before, preferring to wind down alone with a good book or movie. It’s clear that this isn’t the first time they’ve gathered like this; everyone seems pretty comfortable together. Tyler, in particular, is completely unfazed to find his crew mingling with Storm Par.

“You’re not going to rat us out to Scott are you?” Daniel asks nervously.

“City girl wouldn’t do that,” Tyler says confidently, resting an arm over the back of your chair. “Would you?” he asks.

He leans in slightly, his thumb brushing gently against your bare shoulder. The unexpectedly intimate touch startles you, and it takes a moment for you to regain your composure. 

“Your secret is safe with me,” you promise, offering Daniel a reassuring smile.

He seems to accept your words and you settle back into your chair, letting the conversation of the table wash over you. Sipping your beer, you occasionally glance toward the door. There’s no sign of Scott and you’re left wondering about Tyler’s plan. Everyone else seems confident he and Javi won’t make an appearance tonight. 

“Alright, enough sitting. Let’s dance,” Tyler announces, offering you his hand. 

You nearly choke on your beer. “Dance?” you repeat, waving him off. “No one mentioned anything about dancing.”

“I can’t have you leaving Oklahoma without learning how to two-step.”

“How do you know I haven’t?” you challenge.

“I get the impression you don’t let yourself have a lot of fun,” Tyler replies quietly. The softness of his eyes and the utter sincerity in his voice make it hard to hold his gaze. It’s unsettling how clearly he seems to see through you. 

“Come on,” he says, offering you his hand. “It’ll be fun.”

You glance at the door again before letting Tyler guide you toward the dance floor. The beat of the song is fast and you watch how effortlessly the other couples move, their steps fluid and graceful. Tyler takes your right hand and wraps his left arm around you, his palm resting firmly on your shoulder blade, drawing you close. After a moment’s hesitation, you place your left arm on his bicep. He feels warm and strong against you.

“I don’t know what I’m doing.” You say, feeling silly and out of place. 

“Nothing to it. All you gotta do is follow, I’ll lead,” Tyler promises, surging forward and taking you with him. 

You stumble a little, but Tyler’s quick to adjust his pace for you. He keeps you to the outside of the dance floor, guiding you through the moves. You watch his feet, trying to coordinate your own, but you end up stepping on his toes more than a few times. He doesn’t seem to mind, gently correcting you. It feels like you have two left feet and your anxiety flares in response.

“Look up here,” Tyler says, waiting patiently until you meet his gaze before continuing. “Don’t overthink it — just feel it”

“That’s easy for you to say,” you mutter. 

“So let’s keep that big brain busy. Tell me about yourself. Did you go to a fancy school like MIT too?” He asks, his tone playful.

“Uh. No,” you say, glancing down only to have him tap your shoulder. You look up again. “I went to a state school.”

“So did I,” he reveals. “Though it was just for meteorology and atmospheric science.”

“You did?”

“Hey, no need to sound so surprised,” he replies, feigning mock hurt.

“A cowboy and a scholar,” you tease.

“Don’t forget a pretty great dancer, too,” he adds, lifting his arm to twirl you around before pulling you back into his embrace. When he does it again, a breathless laugh escapes you.

“Atta girl,” Tyler says, pulling you even closer. “Now we’re having fun.”

Your skin tingles and you feel warm all over. The world narrows to Tyler’s handsome face, his green eyes deep and captivating in the dim light. Your chest tightens, only allowing you to pull in shallow breaths that leave you lightheaded. In that moment, you realize you haven’t stumbled once — you’re moving perfectly in sync with him.

“One more dance?” He asks. 

“Yeah,” you agree.

The current song fades into something softer and more subdued. The crowd begins to thin, but Tyler doesn’t seem deterred by the change. He lowers his hand to the small of your back, holding you close as he guides you in a slow, graceful sweep across the floor. Despite the smoky bar and the crowd of people, all you smell is Tyler's clean, crisp scent. It reminds you of the first storm of the season, the air electric and charged with energy. Full of potential. 

Tyler stares steadily at you as he continues to move you across the floor, and you find yourself unable to look away from him. The music seems to fade, leaving only the sound of his breathing and your own. Your lashes flutter and you close your eyes, allowing yourself to simply feel — weightless and free. 

It’s only when someone else bumps into you that your eyes snap open and reality comes rushing back. You stumble, but Tyler catches you, pulling you gently to the side.

“Doing alright?” He questions.

You nod, feeling strangely shaky. “I think I need some water.”

Hand still in yours, Tyler tugs you along until he reaches the end of the bar, where a large water jug sits. He hands you a cup, and you drink deeply, surveying the crowded bar. It takes you a while to realize you’re just taking in the sights and sounds, and you haven't thought about Scott at all.

“Our beers are probably warm by now. You want another?” He asks. 

“I shouldn’t.”

He smiles and pulls out his phone, opening the weather app. The screen shows a mess of red and yellow just south of you. “You’re probably right,” he admits.

You both head back to the table, where Boone groans at Tyler’s announcement that his crew should return to the motel after finishing their drinks. Your coworkers seem to agree, with some heading to the bar to settle their tabs.

“I’ll walk you back.” Tyler offers.

Outside, the moon is obscured by thick clouds and it feels cooler than when you first arrived. Your eyes roam the parking lot, catching sight of Scarecrow. Scott and Javi must be back from their meeting. A pang of disappointment hits you. You’d hoped Scott would have seen you with Tyler again. 

“Well…this is you,” Tyler says, stopping in front of your hotel room. “Not a bad night.”

“It wasn’t,” you agree. “But Scott didn’t show up.”

Tyler presses his lips together, his gaze falling away to look at something past you. His nostrils flare and then his eyes return to you, but the tension in his jaw remains.

"You had fun, didn't you?" He prods.

Even if tonight hadn't gone the way you wanted it to, you have to admit he was right. You had fun. 

"I did,” you say, offering him a shy smile. “Thank you.”

“Well, then, it wasn’t a total loss. You had a good time,” he says, his tone warm. To your surprise, he leans in, removing his cowboy hat and holding it level with your face, effectively blocking your view to the left. His hand settles lightly on your hip. “Looks like we’ve got an audience — tall, dark, and a total dipshit.”

You stare up at him, your whole body tingling. “Scott?” You whisper.

“Mmmhmm,” Tyler returns. “Now if you're asking for my advice, I'd let him stew a bit. A man should have to work for you. Put in some effort.”

You nod, and Tyler steps back, pulling his hat on. When you finally look to the left the walkway is deserted, bathed in the dim light filtering through the curtains of the neighboring rooms. Tyler insists on waiting until you're safely inside, and you watch him linger by the door for another minute before he finally turns to leave.

With a sigh, you sit on the bed and slip off your shoes, feeling strangely adrift and unsure. Your text to Scott from this morning remains unanswered and you have no idea if what you’re doing with Tyler is going to help the way you want it to. You press the heels of your hands into your eyes, trying to clear your mind. 

Lost in your thoughts, you nearly miss the soft knock at the door. You crack it open, looking up at Scott. His dark hair is damp, curling over his forehead. He smiles at you and your heart flutters in response. You almost invite him in on instinct, but Tyler’s earlier remarks rise to the surface.

“What?” Scott asks.

You straighten your shoulders, gathering the courage for what you want to ask. “Why didn’t you respond to my text message?”

His brow furrows, like he has zero idea what you’re talking about.

“I sent you a text this morning,” you clarify. 

“We’re not supposed to text and drive in a company vehicle, you know that.” 

His response immediately makes you feel silly because of course that made sense. Just last week Javi got on Daniel about texting and driving. 

“Are you really going to make me stand out here?” He asks, quickly looking down the hall. He was probably worried someone would see the two of you. 

“Of course not.” You step back to let him inside, chewing on the inside of your lip. “I just…why did you have me move cars?” 

Scott presses his tongue against the inside of his cheek and exhales loudly. You wrap your arms around yourself and take a step back, but he follows you.

“You’ve ridden with me the last two days,” he says quietly. One of his large hands cups your jaw. “I can’t have people accusing me of favoritism, can I?” 

You shake your head, frowning. He’s too close, his aftershave nearly overpowering. You need some space. 

“Scott, I —” Whatever you were about to say is cut off as both your phones suddenly buzz, and outside you hear the all too familiar wail of the tornado siren.

♡

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[scribbledonausednapkin]

Missing Crystal: A Yellowjackets Mystery

Summary: Misty isn't that good of an actress, and Mari is onto her. A sharp tongued defender with anger issues and a sweet but savvy junior varsity player team up to crack the case of their missing teammate. The only things standing in their way are the scrappy psychotic team manager, the threat of starvation, and their group devolving into a cannibal cult.

Mari and Akilah put on their detective caps and work together to find evidence to expose Misty for killing Crystal; but is that what the Wilderness wants?

Warnings: Mentions of Canon violence/death/SI

Word Count: 4.5k

Cross-posted on AO3; Chapter 1 Chapter 2

Chapter 3: Wilderness GPS

Akilah breathed in the fresh air, the only nice thing about being here and only because it was clean compared to the stagnant stench that suffocated her inside the cabin. Akilah used to love the outdoors, camping with her fellow troop members for a weekend was a way to get away from the continually growing list of things she needed to accomplish; but the outdoors she loved was a temporary retreat, she realized. The trips she enjoyed were just that - trips. She could escape to the forest and learn about the environment. She could go kayaking, learn how to build a fire, tie knots, all for fun. It was never meant to be longer than a couple days. Now it was her entire life.

Despite the unwanted permanency, the connection she felt to her environment was still strong. Her connection with animals was stronger than the one she felt to the forest, but there was still something there. Something Akilah had never labeled anything more than an enjoyment of the outdoors. 

Akilah’s family was Christian so she was Christian, but she was also a scientist. Okay not actually, obviously, but she believed in evolution. She didn’t not believe in God and she attended church every Sunday, but some things just didn't add up. There had never been a real point in questioning it too much because what was she going to do? Tell her family she wasn’t going to church anymore? They would have killed her.

Still, it wasn’t like she hadn’t dabbled in faith. She wanted to feel a connection to God like her grandma and mom and sisters, like the one she felt with Simba; but honestly, closing her eyes and praying never helped nearly as much as talking to the stray cat. 

Akilah had felt something yesterday. When Mari and Shauna looked like they would recreate the other night’s fiasco, she had been calm. She didn’t overthink it, she let the words find her as she acted on impulse. It was an adrenaline rush even better than winning a game, but was it a connection to the Wilderness or just her blood pumping?

Nugget was gone, but that was for the best. The innocent weren’t going to last long in this group, that much was clear. His sacrifice would hopefully bring them to food; and with food they could save Lottie. Food. Crystal’s body. Akilah gulped, closing her eyes.

“Hey, you okay?”

Akilah and Mari were by the side of the house filling two buckets with snow for water. It was still freezing, but they needed to boil it for drinking water since everyone was going out again. Akilah opened her eyes and found Mari’s weary expression. She gave a half-hearted smile.

“Yeah, just thinking.”

“Me too. I don’t like this splitting up thing. Why would Crystal be near the cabin?” Mari frowned as she bent to dig her bucket into the pact ice.

“Maybe she really did get lost in the blizzard,” Akilah murmured, but Mari was having one of her stubborn tangents where she refused to see another option.

“Lottie never said anything about the queen card being like special or significant or whatever,” Mari grunted as she lifted the bucket, shaking the snow so it settled toward the bottom.

“Javi found it out there somewhere,” Akilah countered, scooping up her own bucket of snow, “and it’s the only queen in the deck. And its eyes are marked off. I think it could mean something.” That feeling of connection was there, maybe not with the queen card specifically, but something about the deck was definitely special. The flames had risen, everyone saw it, right? It couldn’t be another hallucination if the entire group confirmed its existence… right?

“You do?”

“Yeah, it’s worth checking out,” Akilah straightened up, standing firm in her opinion. Whatever they saw, this was a chance to save their friend without resorting to killing each other. Akilah was becoming more numb to the horrors and violence she’d crashed into but there was still hope for something better. They just had to make it through the winter. That’s what her gut told her anyway. Is that what faith was? A gut feeling?

“It’s just Lottie never -” Mari began.

“Mari,” Akilah cut her off gently, “can you just trust me on this?” Her eyes locked with the girl in front of her, brows glued in a furrow just as they had been all morning. Akilah wondered if Mari slept much last night, she hadn’t felt her tossing and turning nearly as much as usual. She’d burrowed into Mari’s back for warmth, even though more than half the time she was pushed off, but the girl had been stiff. So stiff for half a second Akilah feared she was dead, but no, she had been breathing. Maybe she was still hearing the dripping. Akilah almost wished she could still see Nugget the way she had, as a cute fluffy friend and not a corpse stained with Misty’s blood. 

“Oh.” Mari stopped, surprised by Akilah’s request. “Yeah. I trust you.” Her expression finally relaxed, but her gaze was intense. “What you did yesterday was pretty cool. I mean, how did you even think of using the deck like that?”

“I don’t know, it just sort of came to me I guess,” Akilah felt a swell of pride and a bit of heat in her cheeks which was nice against the cold. Even if she had enjoyed orchestrating the ritual, attention still made her uncomfortable.

“So they didn’t teach you that in the girl scouts?” Mari cracked a smile, taking a step. Akilah realized they’d just been standing in the snow.

“No,” she chuckled, “Not really.” She swung the bucket around, falling into line with Mari.

“What about all that medical stuff?”

“What do you mean?” Akilah cocked her head. 

“Like how you did with Shauna, that was really impressive.” Mari shrugged, the buckets felt a lot heavier with the depleted energy and receding muscles. They both struggled to carry the snow, even the short distance to the front of the cabin. Mari had insisted on putting distance between them and the ever listening ears of the group.

“Oh, um, I didn’t really know that much, just what I learned from watching my sister… I was thinking about medical school -”

“Woah,” Mari interrupted. “That’s serious.”

“Kind of. My dad’s a radiologist,” Akilah explained, “It’s good money and hours aren’t bad.” It was a solid plan for a comfortable future, or it could have been.

“Pretty exciting life you got there.” Mari huffed as she dropped the bucket down by the front door. Akilah moved to get closer to the entrance so could quickly enter while Mari held the door. When Mari didn’t immediately open it, however, Akilah looked up. 

Mari was eyeing her with that usual suspicion. 

“Is that what you really want?”

Akilah was surprised, she nearly dropped her bucket. The handle dug into her palms.

“Yes.” She responded immediately, then faltered under Mari’s unmoving gaze, “I don’t know, maybe?”

“You sound very confident,” Mari replied, smirking. Her hand went to the door handle.

“I think being a vet would be kind of cool,” Akilah blurted. Mari raised an eyebrow.

“I could totally see you as a vet.” Mari had an easy smile, so different from her usual resting bitch face.

“Oh - thanks.”

Akilah felt that embarrassment again, but she smiled in return.

“But maybe work on the whole knowing if they’re alive part?” Mari laughed as a harsh wind came by, reminding them that they were again standing in the cold. “Fuck,” Mari breathed as she shoved open the door. 

“Okay, but only if you get your ears checked,” Akilah replied humorously, picking up the bucket into the creases the handle had left just a minute before. She shuffled into the cabin heading toward the fire.

“I swear I’m not crazy,” Mari said, but it was more to herself.

“Bullshit,” Van cut in. She was with Melissa and Gen shuffling through some old shirts and tying them into more headwear. Her tone was a bit harsh for a joke, but before Mari could be offended Akilah added, “I’m just kidding, we’re all crazy.”

Mari frowned, possibly wanting to object but she didn’t. Instead she started preparing the water. 

Akilah noticed Javi and Nat by the window, though it wasn’t long before the young boy got up from the bed. Even though Nat had criticized her plan, she was still going to help. That made Akilah feel better at least, having Nat out there with her tracking skills maybe she could find Crystal. If she actually tried to. 

--

Natalie’s eyes followed Javi as he stood, acknowledging her “gift” with a smile. Gift was the wrong word, it was more like reparations. Trying to make up for the time she let him stay gone, lost. Travis wanted to find his brother and she said no. Even if she was right and the group was more important, still, she had tricked him into thinking Javi was dead. Fuck. That was so fucked; and what did she have to show for it? No meat, no food, just more pain. 

The shadows along the wall moved like it was evening. It wasn’t, she was pretty sure it wasn’t even mid morning. Time moved differently now that the last watch had broken. All they had out here were shadows and the sun which taunted them high in the sky where it could see everything they wished they could. A figure approached from the darker corners of the room.

It was Travis. The light of the fire lit his left profile, the reflection from the white snow through the window lit his right. Nat’s expression dropped.

“Need something?”

“No,” he said simply as he approached, raking a hand through his hair. He took the spot Javi left behind, his eyes drawn to the fire. Clearly that was a lie.

He was hunched over, a typical posture for him as if the weight of his shoulders were too heavy. His forearms rested on his thighs until he got the courage to say what he wanted; he sat up, sighing.

“You’re a good person.” He stated simply, craning his neck so his dark eyes could examine her. Nat didn’t reply, her eyebrow twitching in response, but she didn’t meet his gaze. “And I’m sorry for…” he shook his head, “ever making you feel otherwise.”

Cool. Cool. Yeah, this was normal. 

Nat didn’t feel like a good person, but she also didn’t feel like she did anything wrong. Sure she felt bad about Javi being out there and facing him now was tough but she didn’t regret it. Travis got that now, that she did it for them , not to hurt him. 

She didn’t respond, holding back tears. If all that were true, why did she feel so damn guilty?

Nat took Travis’s hand clutching it tightly, afraid to look into his eyes in case she started getting emotional or some dumb shit like that because she couldn’t do that right now. She had to prepare for a hunt. That’s what it was right? Maybe you could call it a search party but at the end of the day they were all about to do what she did everyday for almost a year. Hunt for food. 

She’s already dead, Nat .

“What?” Nat slowly lifted her head from where she’d been watching his thumb stroking their intertwined fingers.

“I said, are you still pissed at me?”

“What? No.” Nat shook her head, drawing her hands back without thinking about it. “I get it, really. He’s your brother.”

“Yeah, but you’ve been better to him than I ever have been,” Travis basically whispered, hanging his head in shame. She couldn’t let him say that. 

“Nah, I just feel bad. He was alone and cold and I -”

“Hey, wherever he was, he was safe.” Travis surveyed the group but no one seemed to be listening. They were all equipping themselves with all the clothing they had left. Nat’s eyes followed his. She got what he was saying. Maybe wherever Javi had been, he’d been safer than he was now. With them.

“He told Ben something,” Travis whispered so low she was sure she heard him wrong. Her eyes locked onto his, nodding for him to continue. He glanced back around them, making sure there were no gossips listening in. “He said he had a friend who helped him.”

“What?” Nat reacted a little too loudly. A couple of curious eyes hit them. Shit. She’d ruined their privacy, as thin as it was.

“I’m serious,” Travis replied firmly, then brought his hand on her neck and drew her in for a kiss. It was light, but deep enough to warrant a groan or two from the peanut gallery. As he drew away he whispered, “We’ll talk about it later.”

“Where’s Ben?” Mari asked, distrust present in her tone. 

“He was in the bedroom,” Misty replied eerily. Since the stillbirth or maybe since Crystal disappeared she’d been acting weird, and not the usual Misty vibrating off the walls kind of weird. “He was fixing his crutches for the snow.”

Melissa was by the bedroom door and she pushed it open to reveal an empty room. “Not here,” she confirmed after an obligatory scan of the dirty walls with a single bed and empty suitcases. 

“Figures,” Mari huffed. She looked over her shoulder at Akilah who shrugged. There was something going on with those two, they’d been whispering a lot lately. 

Nat’s eyes found Javi standing in the kitchen fiddling with his gloves. Then they flicked to Travis who was watching her intensely.  A friend ?

“He’s been acting weird since…” Gen started, but immediately trailed off. 

“Since we ate Jackie,” Van finished. 

“Yeah, you don’t think he’s trying to find Crystal first?” Melissa said, obviously suspicious. They were all beginning to turn on him.

“Why would he do that?” Tai asked dismissively. 

“To… you know, stop us from eating her… or whatever.” Melissa shrugged, arms crossed.  She had on the backwards cap she always wore, her blond hair streaked with dirt. 

“He wouldn’t do that to Lottie.” Van defended, but her expression wasn’t nearly as confident as her tone. Her eyes lingered on the front door. 

“Maybe he’s scared we’ll eat him.” Shauna said off-handly, more to herself than to the group. Still, it was clear by the uncomfortable air that everyone had heard. 

“Won’t you?” Nat questioned, unable to hold back her defense of Ben. The girls had been treating him weird since the Jackie incident and she had no doubt he was high on their list of potential meal candidates. 

“Don’t act like you’re better than us,” Mari growled.

“Hey, it hasn’t come to that yet, right Akilah?” Tai insisted, calling Akilah to once again keep Mari from a physical altercation. She was beginning to seem a lot like Mari’s keeper. 

“Right, we have a plan. Let’s stick to it okay?” Akilah eyed her hot-tempered friend, communicating without speaking.

“Yeah.” Mari nodded, but it was clear she was worked up. 

All of them were on edge.

“How should we decide who goes where?” Gen asked. 

“The cards,” Van and Akilah replied simultaneously. They exchanged a look before Van grabbed the stack from the kitchen table. Nat watched helpless as the group used a deck of cards to determine all their decisions.

If this was the Wilderness talking to them, it was laughing its ass off. 

--

Akilah ended up by the cliff. Mari was super pissed, especially when Misty drew the ten of clubs. Akilah, Misty, Travis, Gen and Van had drawn the black cards and so they ended up by the cliff. The rest headed for the forested area where the Queen had been placed, near the creek not too far from the cabin.

“Don’t let her out of your sight,” Mari instructed. “And if she doesn’t want to look somewhere that’s exactly where you send Travis to dig.”

That was obvious to Akilah but she let Mari go on with her plan. Obviously she was anxious. 

Akilah had known Mari since tryouts freshman year but even as a sophomore Mari was a sub for varsity so they never really interacted that much. When they crashed Akilah was the resident expert on what was safe to eat and Mari was in charge of cooking so they formed a natural team.

Mari was brass, that was for sure; but she was honest. She wasn’t afraid to speak her mind or call out someone on their bullshit. Akilah appreciated that, admired it even. Maybe that’s why she gravitated to Mari the most. That and aside from Tai she was the funniest on the team. 

“Misty, where did you see her last? Do you remember?” Van asked seriously. Their group was approaching the dump cliff, surrounded by a line of trees on either side. It was a mostly clear path, except for the snow up to their mid calves. 

“I - I don’t know exactly. I think it was around here,” Misty replied, rubbing her biceps. It was miserably cold but the action annoyed Akilah. They were out there because of her. 

Maybe Mari was a hater. Okay, she really was, but she also made some really good points. Misty never forgot anything. She remembered every game, who scored which goal when, whose fault it was the other team scored. She remembered all that medical stuff and who did which chore and all the lyrics to all those musicals and every line to that convincing ass monologue -

But she didn’t remember when she last saw her best friend?

“Did you guys dump the poop before you lost her?” Travis asked. He clenched his jaw and looked over his shoulder. Akilah was pretty sure he was more upset about the separation from Javi and Nat than being out in the cold. 

“Um, yes. Yes, she dumped the poop and then we started heading back -”

“Heading back? Are we even looking in the right place?” Gen asked concerned.

“Yes, the card was over the cliff,” Van replied. 

“But not right over it, maybe she got lost in the woods,” Misty countered. 

“If she did, she'd be where the queen was,” Van answered confidently. Even though it was Akilah’s idea, Van was taking the ritual the most seriously. She seemed to know something they didn’t or maybe it was just that her faith in the Wilderness was so strong. No matter what it was she was a completely different person than the one that had led them cheering to the lake in the summer. 

Akilah was glad Van was here. She knew it would be hard to keep Misty in check if it was just her leading the group, but Van was a strong believer and would listen to the Wilderness above logic. As long as Akilah used that to keep them looking in the right places, maybe they had a shot.

“We should start by the cliff. Even if you too dumped the bucket, maybe she got confused in the snow and turned back by accident.” It seemed likely enough.

“If?” Van was suddenly right beside Akilah and she jumped. 

“What’s wrong?” Travis asked. 

“Nothing, just tripped,” Akilah answered but she was thrown off by the wide and intense green eyes staring daggers into her soul. 

“I meant when,” she corrected quietly to Van. Van looked over her shoulder, but her eyes fell on Travis for a moment. 

The group came to the small clearing before the cliff. They looked out onto the snowy landscape, hearts beating rapidly from the little exercise on no calories. 

“What if she fell?” Gen asked, shuffling toward the edge and peeking down below. There was a small squeak from Misty and Akilah glanced at her concerned face. She pictured what Mari told her: Misty digging frantically in the piles of snow covering the shit dump.

“Maybe she did,” Akilah answered quietly.

“We should split up and look,” Travis declared, “Standing around will only make you colder.”

--

Mari wanted to scream. No way she was out in the snow searching for Crystal’s body when she knew Misty was trying to cover it up by the cliff. She had to trust Akilah, she told herself, she had too. 

If there was anyone Mari knew she could trust, it was Akilah. Well, Lottie too, obviously; but with her thoughts and plans to uncover Misty, only Akilah understood. 

They had used the Wilderness to guide them and Mari was sure the Wilderness had answered. It had given them a sure sign Crystal was by the cliff. How could it not be more clear? The two of clubs, the exact one Crystal had drawn, was placed right over the cliff. Unlike most of the other times Mari held the deck, she had no control over which card was picked during the ritual.

Okay, okay, Mari had been fucking with the deck. It wasn’t hard - her brother Sam was a total nerd and super into magic when he was younger. As the youngest, and also because she was a girl apparently, she was the assistant. Except Mari hated being the assistant. So instead she pretended to be the assistant and learned all the tricks herself. Then when she and Sam performed for their parents, she’d stolen the spotlight. Not exactly the nicest thing in the world but Sam got her back when he tripped her into mud a week later. 

The point was, she knew how to shift a deck. It was easy and since no one knew about her sleight of hand it was simple enough to rig the chores. The day Crystal disappeared she made sure Crystal got the two, but then Misty offered to go with her so she never drew her own. 

It wasn’t possible that someone could have - or even would have - fixed the deck. No one could have expected the brilliance of Akilah. The Wilderness was speaking through her to them, but it felt like Mari was the only one listening. 

The queen card - really? Yeah it was weird and maybe it had significance, but Lottie never said anything about it being special. Besides that it was nowhere near where Mari was certain Crystal’s body was. Akilah was a genius for figuring out how to speak to the Wilderness, but was she serious about this splitting up bullshit? Especially since not only was Misty part of the group she definitely should not be in, but also because the queen group was bigger than the cliff one.

It had been at least an hour of them searching, and while Mari was trying to give it her all, her heart wasn’t in it. Still, she thought of Akilah out there with Misty and she pushed through. Akilah wouldn’t half-ass it, she never did.

Mari didn’t know Akilah super well until they crashed, mostly because Mari was only really on JV her freshman year. She kind of was sophomore year, but she only played if Varsity didn’t need her. Then junior year she’d been bumped to starting center back with Lottie. Back then, Mari knew Akilah as the girl who was always studying before almost every game. She always had a textbook on the bench which would annoy Coach Martinez. Dork, Mari smiled as she thought back; but not like Misty dork like adorable dork.

Now she knew why Akilah was always studying - trying to be a doctor, or vet. She was probably the most studious person she knew other than Tai. Also pretty funny, and really sweet. Things didn’t bother her the way they did Mari, and if they did she never showed it. Akilah was subtle, she didn’t lash out whenever her anger bubbled up. Mari admired that, it wasn’t something she could do. When her anger boiled she felt she had to react or she’d burn alive. Holding back wasn’t in her nature. 

“Hey!” Someone called from somewhere in front of her, hidden by the trees and snow. “Anyone nearby?” The scratchy voice of Nat rang in the still frigid air.

“Yeah,” Mari called, but she wasn’t sure Nat would care to hear her voice. She was probably hoping for Javi. Not that he would verbally respond.

“Find anything?” Nat’s tone was flat, devoid of hope. If anything she was probably hoping for a no. Where would that lead though? Aside from wishing for proof of Misty’s psychotic ways, Mari wanted food. Needed food. She feared the dripping would come back.

“Not yet,” Mari replied, turning away from Nat’s voice and stepping wide into the deep white sea. 

Nat didn’t respond, not that she expected her too. If Crystal was here, Mari would find her. If the Wilderness was serious about this queen card shit, then Mari would just have to trust it.

“What was that?” She heard Nat’s voice, but it wasn’t necessarily directed at her. Still, Mari quieted and closed her eyes like Lottie taught her, listening for the sounds of the environment around her.

There was the chill on her cheek, the trees gentle swaying, the whistle of the wind -

The cracking of a branch.

Mari’s dark eyes shot open toward the source of the sound behind her, in Nat’s direction. Immediately she took off, hearing Nat huffing and boots crunching as she sprinted ahead. 

“What is it?” Mari shouted.

“A deer!” Nat’s cry rang out.

A deer?! 

“Where?” Mari yelled as she stomped through the covered forest floor trying to close the distance between her and her teammate. Her heart jumped at the idea of an actual animal in the forest, when they needed it most.

“A deer!” Nat’s voice repeated, but blew away quickly as the air whipped around Mari’s head. Her head wrap came loose, sagging around her neck. It was hard, so hard to run in the snow. 

Nat’s blonde hair was barely visible as Mari dodged between trees, leaping over branches trying to keep up. Nat was so fast, Mari could never beat her in sprints. She was losing her, but she was fighting with all her strength not too. 

“Hey!” A voice shouted from somewhere in the Wilderness.

There was the sound of more branches snapping up ahead to her right and Tai broke through the trees. Her long legs maneuvered through the brush and she sprinted by Mari, focused on the target ahead. She didn’t acknowledge her.

Mari kept running even as Taissa disappeared, legs feeling rock hard and heavy. A deer, seriously? A deer? It was the only thing keeping her from stopping as the cold hit the back of her throat and she gasped for air - 

Then she was falling, crashing into the deep snow. 

Mari landed hard on her forearms and the thick twigs below splintered against her bones as they broke her fall. She groaned as her body sagged forward into the frigid ice.

“Mari?” 

She heard a voice calling her name. Melissa - 

“Deer!” She screamed pointing ahead though her body was still stuck in the firmly packed snow.

“What?” Melissa panted.

“Deer!” Mari yelled with all her might as she propped herself up out of the snow. “Follow Nat!”

Melissa gazed wide eyed, but quickly took off in the direction Mari pointed. Mari’s head fell back into the freezing snow as Melissa’s dirty blonde hair disappeared into the forest ahead.