#Jah Works

[silvanio-rockers]

The Viceroys - Why

[curryvillain]

OLDIES SUNDAY: Mystic Revealers - Got To Be A Better Way (1991)

The world is troubled, and there’s a lot going on. Every day there’s some sort of conflict in family, friendships, and relationships. People are lead astray from all types of individuals and platforms, and even the most conscious or morally upstanding person can be corrupted. It’s a crazy world out there. Today’s Oldies Sunday selection comes from a Band that has delivered songs that aimed to…

[bear-cubs-art-things]

Rough bust reference for Deija!! This is her reference at the time of Lilys "disappearance". She is roughly 13-14 years old at time of lilys disappearance, and lives in the same orphanage that lily did (by which is referred to as "the House" by Lily, with cringe).

Also, first coloring of a black character, and lemme tell you IM SO FUCKING PROUD OF THIS LIKE OMG W H A T. THE F U C K.

And no, Deija is not available for asks... yet.

[peninsularian]

Righteous chanting from 2001, mixed down by Scientist, and back on the streets courtesy of Roots Foundation

[taviokapudding]

Seeing everyone else discuss their names for Scaramouche/Wanderer is making me realize I put too much thought into it

I’m going with “Fujin Ahana” because it’s got layers

Fujin (風神)because duh, the god of wind is connected to Raijin or Raiden. I feel like that’s a pretty self explanatory last name consider how connected the Inazuma lore is to the Shinto pantheon. Honestly if you didn’t know that reference by now and why that’s the main reason they’re anemo, you gotta be living under a rock.

Aahana or Ahana (亜華/天花) is a name that can mean immortal, morning glory, heaven, sky, or flower depending on the language you’re referencing and it’s also a common last name for those of Chinese descent born overseas. I’m going with the Japanese spelling, Wanderer is going to wake up as a reborn person in a new nation that is full of Sanskrit based names, & it’s typically a female name which kinda pokes at Scaramouche’s initial purpose without blatantly calling them a puppet. Most people assume they’re trans, I suspect the same- at least non-binary so I rather play into that without making it too obvious. Also their redesigned hat & Hindu referencing accessories reminds people of the Aranara & being in the dendro nation, it just makes sense to go with a flower based name.

Other names I considered but I figured not too because they might be used as a Sumeru npc name or be associated with someone else & I rather not clarify every time I’m asked are Caelus, Anila, Enlil, Samir, Azure, & Shu. I also went down a list of flower names and saying “fuu-jin ah-hah-nah” & “ah-hah-nah fuu-jin” outloud felt super natural to me.

Btw there’s a rumor their birthday is Jan 3 & I like the idea of naming them Carnation but do you know how silly that would be in terms of the symbolism? They’re learning how to love but he’s not THAT committed. I considered Carna for short but that’s the name of the goddess who protects internal organs and they’re missing a heart 💀

Like go off if you want to name them Scara or Balladeeznutsinyourmouth to each their own but man, I do feel a bit silly spending a few hours looking at baby names now.

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

Hallelujah I woke up before 7:00 AM FINALLY

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA for sabotaging my boyfriend's hookup with his girlfriend by filling his sex playlist with DJ Crazytimes

I (28NB, they/he) have known my boyfriend (call him C, 29M, he/him) for some 15ish years now. As long as I've known him, he has been on and off again with his girlfriend (call him T, 29NB, he/him). Respectfully, and with love, C and T are two of the worst and most annoying people I know. I want to marry them both specifically so that I can study them under a microscope like a parasitic virus.

Technically they're monogamous, but they're both hooking up with other people (myself included), usually the same people, because they have the same taste in lovers (bad). I have suggested that they give actual polyamory a try, and they reject the idea wholeheartedly. I think they get off on their dynamic, and far be it from me to try more than the bare minimum to dissuade them from it.

A couple months back, they got into a fight and broke up (again) because T (who was unemployed at the time) stole $50 from C (who works at GameStop) so that he could pay for a tank of gas (using C's car) to go hook up with another guy a couple states over. C was not upset that T was hooking up with another guy (because he was Also hooking up with that guy and knew he would not have a leg to stand on), but because of the stolen money + car.

C and I currently live together, because you can't afford an apartment on a GameStop salary, and also, like I said, he's my boyfriend. I'm making carnitas tacos next Friday, and T is coming over, because despite everything, he has nothing else to do on a Friday night. I know that C and T are going to get into a huge fight, and I know that it's probably either going to end with them getting back together out of spite or with someone's vehicle getting keyed--I'm betting on both.

Here's where I think I might be the asshole. I would really like to get inbetween them. Not in a "I don't want you to date each other" kind of way, but in a "holy shit you are both so insufferable i would like to get in on that" kind of way. I currently have my thing with C, and I've hooked up with T once in the past, but I would really like to make it official with him as well.

My plan is as follows: C and T are going to be in the same space again next Friday. They're going to fight, then hook up, then get back together again. C is one of those cybersexual "i built my own computer and run it on Linux" people, which is to say, he thinks tiktok and youtube are evil, and he he thinks spotify premium is supporting megacorporations. So, his sex playlist for T (we do not have our own sex playlist) is just an actual folder of mp3 files.

While C is at work, I'm going to log into his computer and change several of those mp3 files to DJ Crazytimes' Planet of the Bass, which I play often, and he is frequently annoyed by. My hope is that he'll realize it was me, he'll come and yell at me for ruining their hookup, T will take my side to piss him off, and the tension will get to the point where they let me join their hookup, and I can ask to date both of them after that.

To be clear, I recognize that I'm also Incredibly Toxic for enabling and encouraging this behavior. That said, I feel like I'm justified in this scenario considering C and T are both Also toxic, and furthermore, it is a known fact that I'm dating C right now, so for them to hook up, C would technically be cheating on me. I asked C's sister (a childhood friend of mine) for her take on whether it would be funny or just annoying, and she just told me that we all deserve each other, so I think I should be good. Am I being uniquely shitty here?

What are these acronyms?

[suiana]

(yandere! zombie x gn! survivor reader) (im such a youtube shorts kid bruh this idea came to me because of a video i watched)

did you know that zombies retain their habits from when they were humans?

well you sure as hell do now, because why is your annoying neighbour still following you around?? he's literally fucking rotting???

"shoo! go away!"

you hiss at him, shooting a rubber band at him before quickly climbing up a tree. phew, you wouldn't be bothered by him from here. it's been like this for a few days now, your undead neighbour following you around as you did your best to survive in this ruined world.

you never really liked him, your neighbour that is. he's always been that one weird guy that keeps annoying you ever since he moved in. constantly knocking on your door and asking to have meals together, to getting to and from work at the same times as you... you're so sure that he was stalking you. how could it ever be a coincidence that he just somehow knew when you were going out and coming back from work?

but now you wouldn't ever know and it's not like you wanted to know anyway. ignorance is bliss after all. oh! he's also very stubborn and it's quite apparent in his zombie form.

"bweh."

"go away!"

the zombie hits at the tree you were sitting down on as he looks up at you with what seemed to be puppydog eyes. you could only grimace at the sight before checking through your supplies. shit, you're running out of stuff.

"ugh... i'll need to scavenge for food-"

"guh!"

you raise an eyebrow at your undead admirer before humming. right, you suppose it isn't that bad that you have him around... he gives you stuff that's useful and scares away other mobs (you think he eats them if they get too close to you). you would've actually coddled him like a dog if he wasn't trying to get into your pants or kiss you every second.

"thanks."

you lean forward and snatch the bad of chips from his rotting hands before stuffing it into your bag. mn, you could probably have that for your lunch and dinner tomorrow.

"let's see... i need to find a good place to sleep tonight."

"bwa! buh beh!"

your zombie immediately starts scratching at the tree bark before jutting his lower lip. huh...

"no, i'm not sleeping in your apartment."

"gah!"

you think you're starting to understand zombie language because why are you holding full on conversations with him??

"don't give me that face. you know our apartment complex is riddled with zombies. i don't want to be turned."

"kh... gur! rh..."

"you think i'm trusting you? i swear i saw our old neighbour lurking around there and he was an olympic sprinter."

you shake your finger at the zombie before sighing softly. why did this apocalypse have to happen? things were going great for you before this. you just had a raise and you were so close to landing a date with your hot boss!

if you didn't know any better you'd have thought that your little zombie admirer was the one who kickstarted this zombie apocalypse because of his jealousy. what did he work as before he turned? a scientist?

"tn... jhn... ngh..."

"don't act all sassy with me right now. it's not like i want to sleep in your place to begin with. you'd probably lock me in there with you and i'd be trapped."

"bah!"

rolling your eyes at the sassy undead man, you rest against the trunk of the tree and shut your eyes. might as well get some rest before setting off again.

"i'm going to rest now. help me keep an eye out."

"kah kah. jah?"

"no, i won't kiss you. and no, i most certainly won't reward you with myself. you're rotting, damnit! how many times do i have to tell you that?"

"ui..."

what in the sassy zombie apocalypse have you gotten yourself into?

[silvanio-rockers]

Sevana - Lowe Mi

[halfbloodfics]

sub!snape headcanons :)

{part one}

im working on some sub!snape fics rn (ur requests), but in the mean time... have this

im high. so i apologize if thiss is a mess. pls ignore the grammar or whatever

warnings: NSFW, explicit, smutty (MINORS DNI OR I STG)

alright here we go (virgin, inexperienced, sub!snape)

My headcanons about...

Kissing: I honestly, this is kinda sad, but i imagine that sev was always really scared to be kissed because he thought it would be a prank. The first time you kiss him would have to be somewhere private, for this reason and the fact he hates pda, and you'd have to ask him. (i mean obviously, consent is important folks) but i mean, like literally verbally, "Severus, can I kiss you?" And i think at first his face is just blank, like hes trying to figure out if you're serious, amd he gets all flustered, and blushing and like "i, uh, you want.. are u sure? i.." or he is literally speechless and just nods

Kissing Cont. As the kissing gets more intimate i feel like hed be breathing pretty heavily. we know this man is skilled at occulemency and can control his emotions sooo well.. but when it comes to this... i think that man lets it go and is just a shaky, panting, flustered mess

Teasing: Especially in the beginning, he doesn't like to tease you or make moves. One, he's impatient. Two, he doesn't really know what to do and is scared of doing the wrong thing and messing up. But the second you start kissing on his neck... Running your hands down his body...

Preferences: sub!snape i think def prefers gentle!dom. i don't think he'd be totally against pain or stuff like that... but especially at first and for the most part, imo he would prefer to be taken care of. like lets bffr, his entire life he was neglected, touch starved and forced to always be in control. I think he would crave giving in, letting someone else control him

Prefrences Cont. He keeps his clothes on, especially at first. prob the trauma, mixed with insecurity, mixed with a bunch of other fun stuff. But at first, he is nearly fully clothed.

Kinks: Praise. 100%. And if you asked him before you guys had had sex about praise he probably would've scoffed. But the second you're on top of him the first time, moaning his name, saying how good hes making you feel, how well he's going... I think hes like o h. also slight degredation

Kinks cont. I don't think he'd like to be tied up tbh. as pretty as that'd be.. i think he'd need to touch you, feel you, his hands roaming everywhere. being pinned down by your wrists is different tho

Fav positions: when he's sub! he def likes you riding him, pinning his wrists down, taking what you need from him. he gets to see your whole body.. and relax for once and be a lil selfish in his own pleasure

Oral: sub!snape def prefers to give as opposed to recieving, i think this about dom!snape too, but especially about sub!snape. especially when you ride his face, when he gets to look up at you, watch your face contort in pleasure... especially when you grind down on him, but giving sub!snape head is like, a religious experience fam. on jah, on your jaw, dun dun tiss. yea that man is a shaking, whimpering mess, his hands clawing at the sheets, panting, cursing, begging. yep

His first time: lets be honest guys. he aint lasting long. but i think he would be like THIS? is what its like? and then proceed to overexhaust himself by going ten times because how in the world had he never felt this before.

misc.

he never used to touch himself much, insecurity and yk depression, but since you... whenever you're gone... he fucks his pillows yep i said it.

he def likes to edged, and having to beg for it. idk why, but i'd die on this hill.

he blushes so easy. like so easy. the man is so pale, one compliment or small kiss and his face is red

he's relatively quiet. he's verbal, but doesn't moan very loud. more so whispers, begs, quietly.. especially at first when he's more shy. but when he starts to get desperate, maybe after a lil bit of edging... he whimpers when he cums and thats just the truth

but if you compliment those whimpers.. tell him how much it turns you on.. he'll let them out even more

building on that, he wants to please you. be good for you. know that he's doing it right. in a horny way and also in a kinda emotional like.. she really does want me look at how shes reacting kinda way

loves to watch your face when he's making you cum

the first time you pull his hair hes like oh....

needs a lil extra aftercare after being sub! cause its a very vulnerable thing for him.. but his fav is just to lie there, cuddle you, bonus points if you praise him and tell him how proud you are of him

this was shameless.

cheerio xx

[asteroidfieldgame]

If Gavilar Had Survived a Little Longer

Gavilar: Tell Thaidakar he's too late!

Szeth: I don't know who that is

Gavilar: Restares? Sadeas?

Szeth: My masters are...

Gavilar: Don't tell me, I want to guess. Was it Nale?

Szeth: You mean Nin? No.

Gavilar: Taln is mad that I want to take his place?

Szeth: Stop guessing Heralds

Gavilar: I've got it! The stormfather! I knew he was lying!

Szeth: You're insane.

Gavilar: Elhokar or Dalinar making a play for the throne?

Szeth: No

Gavilar: Navani's really mad that I yelled at her?

Szeth: Is there anyone in your family you don't suspect of killing you? It wasn't them.

Gavilar: I don't suspect Jasnah. Was it Taravingian? He seems to be up to more than he lets on.

Szeth: Don't be silly, I would never work for him.

Gavilar: Is the king of Jah Keved so scared of our alliance with the Parshendi that he’d have me killed?

Szeth: How do you have so many enemies but still have more than you think? My masters are the Parshendi.

Gavilar: That doesn't make any sense!?

Szeth: RAFO

Gavilar: ...Take this sphere and tell my brother he must find the most important words a man can say.

Szeth: Dying requests are sacred in my culture, I will do as you ask.

Gavilar: Wait! As my dying request can you instead kill everyone else I guessed except my family members?

Szeth: ...Okay not that sacred.

[meggannn]

AITA for not accepting my EX coworker's feedback on my personal project and destroying his favorite toy when he refused to leave?

I don't really see how I'm the bad guy but I thought I'd ask in case there's a new perspective I'm lacking. I am very rarely wrong but I admit I have miscalculated before.

I (M, none of your business how old I am) have an old coworker, Vance* (M, ??? maybe like 100, it's hard to guess dwarven ages) who I used to get along with okay. We'd occasionally share some banter and have the odd disagreement on how a project needed to be handled but it was nothing major. Last I knew him, he had a side job as an author and I enjoyed reading his books. We worked together for a few years but this was about a decade ago.

The thing is though, I've always been a bit of a lone wolf. During my time at that old company, I'd been wanting to leave that job as soon as I started it, to pursue my real passion project. I was only there for as long as it took to support my own goals. As soon as we achieved a major milestone at the company, really the only reason the company was founded, I decided to leave without warning. I understand this is rude among many cultures nowadays but I knew they would no longer need me, and I was planning on traveling quite a long ways for my new job and it was unlikely I'd see any of them again, so I thought it would be best for everyone if I just cut ties.

It's now been about ten years and I recently made a major step in finally finishing my project. Not to exaggerate but you could really say this is truly the most revolutionary thing in at least several millennia. It will be something truly special and people will understand its brilliance once everyone really gives my project a try with an open mind.

But just as I was about to complete it, I heard a voice I haven't heard in a decade. It's Vance, with his favorite crossbow (he named it Blanca*, that's not important but just so you can understand he's a guy who likes to nickname things). He stalked me across the continent! Then just showed up and rudely started providing feedback, as though he was part of this project! And he called me by an old nickname he thought was funny back when we were still working together. Look, I would be happy to talk to him any time, but just not then, you understand? And especially not if he was going to try to talk me down from completing my pièce de résistance!

I've had a long time to consider my goals and actions. I truly believe my passion project will change the world for the better. I explained all of this to him. But he wouldn't back down, and then he AIMED Blanca at me, fully loaded. I just couldn't abide that. So I destroyed Blanca.

Now everyone on the internet is upset with me, but I think that's a huge overreaction; not to brag or anything, but I could have done much worse to him. So tell me, AITA?

Please note that I am ONLY accepting judgments on if I am the asshole for DESTROYING BLANCA, not for working on my passion project. I will not apologize for that.

*Names have been changed to protect my anonymity.

(thanks to @zombolouge for the help)

[alexfromjersey]

𝓢𝓹𝓸𝓷𝓽𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓞𝓾𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 & 𝓕𝓪𝓶𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓪𝓵 𝓐𝓿𝓸𝓲𝓭𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓮

jenna x g!poc

summary: jenna avoids talking to her family. jah plans a spontaneous outing

warnings: mature language, smut, tiny bit of violence

a/n: this is my all-time fav fanfic to write. I actually enjoy writing again, it’s been a long time since I’ve said that. also I can’t express enough how much I appreciate 230+ followers it’s small to some but this is huge to me thank you 🥺🫶🏾. enjoy the chapter - 5.5k words

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“Jenna…you’re pregnant?”

Those words coming out of her mother’s mouth made all the air in Jenna’s body disappear. Nervousness filled her and tears started to fill her eyes. At the sight, you instantly stood up from leaning against the car.

“What happened?” You mouthed in concern to her.

“Hello? Jenna?”

Jenna stepped away, “How did you find out?”

It was quiet on the other side for a moment, “So it’s true…you are pregnant.”

“Yeah, Mom I am. Listen I was going to call you and Dad and tell you guys but I had other things to handle first” Jenna explained.

“Handle? What things needed to be handled first? I get a call at one in the morning while on break at work from Hudson. My heart done fell out of my ass because I thought something bad happened to you-”

“Wait, wait Hudson called you and told you?” Jenna questioned.

“Yes. Told me that you got pregnant by some hoodlum. Who is this person anyway? You never mentioned you were seeing anyone” Natalie asked.

Jenna looked at you, you were glancing at her with concern and confusion. You saw that her face contorted into something that kinda scared you…and turned you on.

“Mom I have to go but I promise I will call you back and explain everything,” Jenna said.

Jenna didn’t wait for her mother to reply before she hung up the phone. Her walk back to you was full of annoyance and frustration.

“What happ-”

“I need to go somewhere” Jenna interrupted you and texted Big L to go home. As she passed you, she took the keys out of your hand.

“Uh…” That was all you were able to say as Jenna got into the driver's seat. Sensing the anger radiating from her, you just decided to follow her. You hopped in the car and Jenna pulled off immediately.

After a deathly silent drive to NoHo, you quickly arrive in front of a luxury loft apartment building. Jenna turned off the car and quickly hopped out. You were right on her heels.

She walked into the lobby where she was greeted by a doorman.

“Good evening Ms. Ortega” The doorman greeted.

But Jenna ignored him, her focus was on getting the little bastard on the top floor. You and her walk into the elevator which was thankfully empty.

“You gon’ talk or what? I’m lost on this entire thing right now” You questioned.

“My mother knows” Jenna revealed.

Your eyes widen at the revelation, “oh shit.”

“Oh shit is right. The person who told her lives in this building” Jenna said and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Mhmm” You hummed.

The two of you stood in silence for a moment almost to the floor Hudson lived on. You took the ring off your pinky finger and stuffed your necklace into your shirt. You also pulled off your glasses and held them in your hand.

Jenna looked at you, “What are you doing?”

“I’m getting ready just in case I gotta beat a bitch ass” You shrugged nonchalantly.

Soon, the two of you arrived on Hudson’s floor. You followed behind Jenna until she stopped at the last door on the floor. She started to bang on the door nonstop.

A few moments later, the door swung open to reveal a groggy Hudson. Before the door fully opened, Jenna pushed her way inside.

“You had no right! No fucking right to tell my mother my business” Jenna seethed.

Now Hudson was fully awake, “I did you a favor!”

You casually walked inside the apartment and close the door. You leaned against the counter watching the scene unfold.

“No! You did yourself a favor! I told you to stay out of this. I told you multiple times and you still keep doing it. You were my best friend Hudson and I trusted you! But now I’m done with you Hudson.” Jenna snapped.

Hudson’s face contorts into an angry one, “Done with me! After everything I did for you, you just going to drop me like that! You know what, maybe I should tell the world and your little thug girlfriend everything about you and I mean everything. Show everyone the real Jenna Ortega” Hudson threatened lowly.

If it was possible Hudson would be liquified by the way Jenna was glaring into his soul.

“Or maybe I should just show her all the videos and headlines. Especially the most recent one that’s not even a year old yet.” Hudson challenged the smaller brunette.

Hudson was suddenly cut off by a pain in his left cheek and his head whipped to the right. You instantly get up and pull Jenna away from Hudson.

“Okay, time to go,” You said and continued to pull her away.

Hudson glared at Jenna as he rubbed his cheek. You and Jenna leave the boy’s apartment and make your way back to the elevator. Tears were now falling freely down Jenna’s face. Once inside you push the emergency stop button. The elevator stops and you turn towards Jenna.

Immediately Jenna started to sob and you rushed in to pull her close to you. Your arm wrapped around her and she grabbed a fist full of your shirt. You felt her whole body racked with sobs. You kissed the top of her head and hugged her tighter.

����🏻🩵

TWO DAYS LATER

It's been two days since Jenna last spoke with her mother. Technically Natalie was calling and texting her daughter but she was too afraid to answer. Instead, the actress coped in her hotel room avoiding everyone, crying, and eating up all the room service food.

You just came back from shooting hoops with Davis and a few other friends. You took your shower and got dressed in some comfortable clothes. You haven't heard from the actress in a while and you were getting worried. So you grabbed your keys and set off to her hotel.

The journey didn't take long and you made your way up to the floor you knew she stayed on. You then knocked three knocks on the door. A few moments later, an exhausted looking Jenna opened the door.

"Damn girl you look terrible" You spoke without a second thought.

Jenna glared at you, "I will slam this door in your face."

"I'm sorry. My intrusive thoughts won that round. What you doing being cooped up in this stuffy ass room?"

"Sulking in my depression" Jenna replied and left from the door. You stepped inside and closed the door behind you. The hotel room was a lot different from the last of you were in. This was like presidential suite, it had a kitchen, multiple rooms, a big ass dining table, and 85inch TVs.

"That Scream money got you in severe luxury. I might have to dabble into the acting business" You joked.

Jenna, however, ignored you, she instead went back into her room and buried herself under her covers.

"Nah get yo ass up," You said and ripped the comforter off Jenna's body. Underneath, she was only dressed in an oversized white button up shirt and real short shorts.

“No” Jenna moaned and tried to grab the comforter but you moved it out of the way.

“Nah get your pregnant emotional ass up” You stated.

“Real talk, I know the news hitting your fam is not the way you wanted it but they know now. It’s been two days, you can’t keep avoiding them, especially your Moms.” You continued.

“You didn’t hear how she sounded Jah. I never heard my mother sound so disappointed in my life. Not even when pictures of me smoking cigarettes came out” Jenna said.

“I get it. You do your best trying to be this perfect child for your parents. When you disappoint them, you’re afraid that they’ll look at you differently” You commented.

“Yeah,” Jenna nodded.

“But they also gotta understand that you are human. Regardless of how perfect you try to be, you are going to make mistakes in your life. If they can’t accept that then, no offense, they got parenting all wrong” You added.

“You gonna be the fun parent while I be the strict one?” Jenna questioned.

"Why can't we both be fun parents with understandable boundaries" You stated and lay back to next to her.

Jenna sighed and the two of you just lay there in a comfortable silence staring at the ceiling before Jenna spoke again. "This room is suffocating. I need to go somewhere or do something"

You sat up on your forearms, "You are just luck Hollywood. I need you to get up and get dressed. I wanna take you somewhere to get your mind off things."

"I mean there are other ways to take my mind off things" Jenna smirked.

For a second you considered what she was implying but then you had to remember your talk yesterday.

"You are a very horny woman Jenna Ortega. Now get up and get a move on you smell like a reheated supreme pizza" You smirk at her annoyed face and leave her room.

“Asshole” Jenna grumbled.

🤰🏻🩵

It was an hour later, Jenna still had a little attitude with you, which you found amusing. She was finally ready to go. The two of you left your apartment and got in your car.

“Where are we going?” Jenna asked.

“You’ll see.” You smiled and started the journey to your destination. Jenna pouted and sat back in her seat. The car journey was mostly just filled with you bopping along to the music while Jenna stared at the scenery.

The disappointment in her mother’s voice still echoed throughout her head. She knew that she needed to talk to her family and explain everything but she wasn’t ready just yet.

Shortly after, you finally arrived at your destination, The Bronx Museum of the Arts. You always wanted to take someone here but you never found the right person until now.

“Welcome to the Bronx Museum of the Arts,” You smiled as you opened the door for her. The two of you walked into the building that was playing a jazzy instrumental softly.

Immediately, Jenna was amazed by the art she saw. From paintings to sculptures to graffiti art. You stood a little bit behind her as she looked over the art. You, too were interested in all the art, especially the graffiti.

Graffiti reminded you of your father. Before he left, he was a construction worker but had a talent for graffiti art. Often getting in trouble in his youth with his friends for tagging buildings, cars, and billboards. Your father tried to teach your older brother how to make graffiti art but he was never interested enough. But when you came along, he was ecstatic to finally share his talent with his one of his offspring.

“This is amazing” Jenna beamed after she finished reading the description of one of the statues.

“I’m glad you like it. I was kinda worried you wouldn’t like it” You said and scratched the back of your neck nervously.

Jenna smirked as she looked at you, “Nervous?”

You stopped scratching the back of your neck and shoved your hands in your jeans pockets.

“Nah I don’t get nervous,” You said and cleared your throat.

Jenna just nodded with a smile. As much as she wanted to hold your hand, she restrained herself and kept walking through the exhibit. You followed behind her and put a good enough distance between the two of you. Jenna took notice of it but didn't make a comment. The two of you just continued enjoying your time at the museum, learning more about the Bronx and Hip-Hop culture.

Two hours have passed and the museum was, unfortunately, closing. You and Jenna left the building, vowing to come back to finish.

Instead of leading her to the car, you make your way down the street.

It wasn’t long until you arrived at the second destination, Black Knight Lounge. It was recommended to you by one of your buddies you play hoop with. It was a low-key club that served banging food and played fire music. But what made you come here was the fact that it had an open mic night, which coincidentally was tonight.

“Party for 2,” You said to the hostess who nodded and grabbed two menus. The hostess led you to a booth to the right of the stage.

“Enjoy” The hostess smiled and placed the menus down before leaving.

“This seems familiar” Jenna joked.

You chuckled and thought back to the night your child was conceived, “Reminds me of the night we conceived our child. A night that I remember daily.”

Jenna hid her red face in the menu which you laughed at. She went back to looking over the menu while you stared at her, taking in her natural beauty. This was the most relaxed you had seen her in the past week. The girl was a busybody and often forgot that she was human and can get exhausted. Hopefully, since she’s pregnant now she’ll take her body's health into consideration more.

“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen! Welcome to the Black Knight Open Mic Night. For all my newcomers, open mic night is the chance to showcase your musical, poetic, or comedic talents in front of everyone. Do your best cause you never know who’s watching. Rules are: each person gets a limit of 3-4 minutes, you may perform an original or cover, and you must have the instrumental for your music or perform it yourself. The winner gets $500. Without further ado let’s get it started!” The DJ announced excitedly.

Everyone in the building clapped their hands while one person went up to the DJ booth and handed him a USB.

“Alright, we have our first performer for the night. Give it up Mr. ChiBX” The DJ yelled into the microphone.

“Twenty bucks, he chokes” You challenged the girl.

“He’s not going to choke. I believe in him” Jenna said optimistic.

You pulled out a $20 bill and smacked it on the table with a smirk. Jenna smiled and also pulled out a $20 bill and smacked it on top of yours. The two of you then turned towards the stage where the overweight middle-aged man was sweating bullets.

“I like to start off my set by telling a little joke. What do you call an angry carrot?” ChiBX asked.

No one in the room answered the man so the DJ took pity on him, “I don’t know man what do you call an angry carrot?”

“A steamed veggie” ChiBX wheezed.

You and Jenna covered your mouths as you laughed from secondhand embarrassment. Again, no one in the room laughed or chuckled. The DJ cringed before hitting a button that made a buzzing sound.

ChiBX frowned and without another word just left the stage.

“Poor guy” Jenna pouted.

You, on the other hand, grabbed the $40 from the table, “Aye I’m $40 richer.”

Jenna rolled her eyes in amusement while you did a quick little dance in your seat. The two of you continued playing the game after ordering your drinks and entrees, only adding money to the mix when one of you was super confident of winning.

While sipping your Sprite, you noticed Jenna kept glancing down at her phone.

“Call them” You blurt out.

Jenna looked up, “What?”

“Call your folks. Avoiding them more is only going to make things worse than they should be” You explained.

Jenna didn’t want to talk about it so she switched the subject, “When are you going to tell your mom?”

You sighed when she switched the subject but you didn’t want to push her to talk about anything she didn’t want to.

“She gets back from Jamaica tomorrow. Which brings me to asking you if you feel comfortable meeting her tomorrow? You can absolutely suggest another time too” You said.

Jenna contemplated meeting your mom right now, especially when she’s not on speaking terms with hers right now. But then she weighed the facts that, she’s going to be gone for a few months filming Beetlejuice in London. She didn’t want to wait until she was halfway from giving birth to tell your mother.

“Yeah I would love to meet her” Jenna smiled and nodded.

“Great” You smiled.

Moments later, your food has arrived. The two of you sat in silence and devoured your plates entirely. By the time you were both done, the place was packed now. More people got up to the mic and performed comedy pieces with only three performing rap songs.

You were now sitting beside Jenna with your arm around her and her leaning into your side. You guys wanted to stay for a little bit longer to watch whoever got on stage.

“Jahaziel?” Someone called your name from behind you.

The both of you looked to the side and saw an older gentleman dressed in a polo shirt and slacks. You recognized him as one of your father’s old friends.

“Mr. Greenhill, how you doing?” You greeted the man and shook his hand.

“I’m doing good young blood. I haven’t seen you since you were little. How’s Moms?” Mr. Greenhill gleamed.

“Yeah. She’s doing good. She comes back from Jamaica tomorrow” You answered.

“Word? I might stop by and visit her. I haven’t seen her since she and Emanuel moved to Highbridge” Mr. Greenhill said.

At the mention of your father’s name, your smile faltered a little. You hoped he didn’t ask you about how or where your father was.

“Excuse me, where are my manners. I’m Mr. Greenhill, I was a friend of her father's and I used to babysit this knucklehead” Mr. Greenhill introduced himself.

"This is Jenna...we're friends" You introduced her.

Friends. The title left a bitter taste in your mouth and an arrow in Jenna's heart.

"Nice to meet you Jenna" Mr. Greenhill smiled at her which she reciprocated. "Am I gonna see you on that stage?"

“Nah I don’t think so. I don’t have anything prepared” You declined.

“The lies you tell. You are always prepared when it comes to music. This one used to put on concerts for the whole block when she was little. Singing her heart out using songs no one expected her to sing. Like that time you sang Chain Reaction by Diana Ross” Mr. Greenhill reminisced.

You chuckled, “I remember. Dre and I were using buckets as drums.”

“Yes! Good times” Mr. Greenhill said.

You nodded in agreement.

"Alright, I don't want to interrupt your outing more than I already have. It was good seeing you young blood and again nice meeting you too Jenna." Mr. Greenhill said.

"Likewise" Jenna smiled. Mr. Greenhill left your table. You take a sip of your drink but you felt eyes burning into the side of your skull.

“What?” You questioned as you looked at Jenna.

“When were you going to tell me you made music?” Jenna raised an eyebrow.

"Oh see that's how I know you are a fake friend because I have music out," You said.

“How was I supposed to know that? You don’t even promote it” Jenna replied.

"Because I made it when I was 13. I put out four songs and three had music videos. We spent a hefty amount of money on them. Almost went homeless because of it" You shrugged and placed your drink down.

“What do you mean?” Jenna asked.

“I used to do little shows on the corner by my house with Davis and a few other friends. One day, a guy came up to me after I finished performing a song and basically sold me a dream. Told me that he was a record label agent and if I signed with him I’ll be this big child singer and I’ll be rich and yadayadayadaya. So I begged my Moms to let me sign with this man cause music is my dream, singing and dancing and performing is my love language. It took a while but my mom eventually let me sign with the man under the conditions that she will manage everything and I’ll still be in school. Everything was smooth, I made those four songs and did the music videos, my mom went from having two jobs to basically a part time job so she can manage my career. So I don’t know what made her look more deeply into these people but I’m glad she did because she found out that they were pocketing the money I made from those songs.” You explained.

Jenna gasped, “How much?”

“They pocketed almost 70k from us. We never noticed because they would show us falsified documents of where the money was going too. They would tell us all our money was going to these fake ass fees and shit. ” You said and sipped your soda.

“Wow. Do you want to make music again?” Jenna asked.

"Eh I don’t know maybe later in my career. I haven’t properly performed in almost ten years so I don’t know if I still got it in me" You shrugged.

"Doesn’t hurt to try again. This is a good opportunity to practice " Jenna said and motioned to the stage.

“Oh no thank you. I’m good" You stated.

“Aw come on Jah…like you said singing, dancing, and performing is your love language. Don’t give up on something you love. Don’t let those people prior take away your passion” Jenna said.

After a moment of contemplating, you let out a sigh, “Fine.”

You stood up from the booth and Jenna watched with excitement as you walked over to the DJ booth. You opened your phone to the notes section. You found a song you wrote a couple years ago. You skimmed through the lyrics until you felt like you had the lyrics down pack. You handed the DJ your phone with the beat on it.

“What you wanna be introduced as?” The DJ asked.

“Just Jah is fine” You answered and he nodded.

You walked up to the microphone on the small stage. You can feel everyone’s eyes on you which placed your nerves in. But when your eyes locked on brown ones, you felt every single nerve disappear. You took a deep breath in and gave a thumbs up to the DJ.

“Alright ladies and gentlemen, give it up for our first singing performance of the night, Just Jah!” The DJ announced.

That’s not…whatever.

The beat for your song started playing.

“It’s crazy how your heart just has a mind of its own, yeah, yeah” You started singing.

Jenna’s jaw dropped at the sound of your raspy R&B-suited voice.

“Like when a smile, that makes a choice on its own”

Jenna was completely enchanted by everything about you. From learning that you can sing to your beauty to your mindset. Everything about you made her realize something.

She was falling in love with you. Hard. Which made her even more petrified.

“My mind tries to deny it but girl I can’t fight what I know. I know. I want you baby ooh” You take your voice up a few octaves and stun every single person in the room except for one.

Mr. Greenhill was by the entrance of the building with a proud smile on his face.

You finished the rest of the song and everyone was giving you a standing ovation. You thanked everyone and went back to the booth.

“I need you to sing just for me every day from now on,” Jenna said.

You laugh as you sat down, “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Seriously, I need more music from you. I need it like yesterday” Jenna joked.

You continued to laugh at Jenna's eagerness for more music from you. It gave you the confidence boost you didn't know you needed to actually start making music again.

“Wow! What an amazing performance by Just Jah. Now I’m gonna take a quick 30-minute break and I’ll be right back with some more performances” The DJ said and switched on some music.

You recognized the song as Aaliyah's. All the couples in the room stood from their seats and went to the small dance floor. You grabbed Jenna's hand and pulled her up and towards the dance floor.

"May I have a dance with you darling?" You spoke in a British accent which made Jenna giggle.

"You shall" She replied.

You placed her arms around your neck and your hands on her waist. The two of you start swaying to the beat of the song.

"I know this was a spontaneous friend outing but did you enjoy yourself today?" You asked.

"Best friend outing I've ever been on" Jenna answered honestly.

“The best? You just boosted my ego to astronomical heights” You joked.

Jenna giggled before staring into your hazel eyes. The blue strobe lights in the room bounce off your skin beautifully.

“I want to kiss you so bad” You admitted to the shorter girl.

Before Jenna can stop herself and think, her answer spilled out her mouth instantly.

“Do it” Jenna muttered.

At the consent, you didn't hesitate to connect your lips with hers. The kiss was full of passion and love that it made the both of you slightly dizzy. You pull her closer and grip her waist as the kiss gets deeper. Jenna gripped the hair on the back of your neck. Before the kiss could escalate more in public, you pulled away but kept your forehead on hers.

“My place?” You suggested lowly.

“Absolutely” Jenna nodded quickly.

🤰🏻🩵

The both of you knew it was wrong, especially after the discussion you had two days ago. But you couldn't stop yourselves, you were both addicted to each other. An addiction that is going to generate consequences in the future.

By the time the two of you were back in your apartment, lips were interlocked and clothes were scattered everywhere. You barely made it up to the apartment with how much the two of you couldn't keep your hands to yourselves. But you made it safe and clothed until the door was shut.

Jenna sighed in pleasure as your lips enclosed her nipple. Your other hand makes itself useful by rolling the other bud in between your fingers. You gave attention to the other nipple before continuing your way down her body. Kissing every patch of her skin, worshipping her body.

But Jenna was impatient, she wanted you at her golden area to take care of the ache between her thighs. But you weren’t ready just yet.

"Jah...please" Jenna whined.

The sound of her calling your name was enough to get you even harder than before. You decided to stop teasing her and settled between her legs. You looked up and saw her staring down at you with lust-filled eyes waiting for you. You kept eye contact with her as you slowly licked from her hole up to her clit.

Instantly, she threw her head back against the pillows and dragged out a moan. Then, you went to work. You started your pleasurable assault on her clit, going from kitty licks to sucking on it repeatedly.

“Oh my…fuck” Jenna moaned and arched her back while gripping the sheets in her hands. You hook your hands under her thighs and pull her closer. You moaned at the sweet taste of her which sent vibrations throughout her body.

Her moans went up an octave each time you did it. She felt the knot in her stomach appear and she knew she was going to cum soon. You removed one of your hands from her thigh. You ran a finger up and down her slit, gathering wetness before pushing your middle finger inside her hole.

Her knuckles turned white from her grip on the sheets. You started slowly pumping in and out before reattaching your lips to her clit. You added a second finger, your ring finger to the mix.

Jenna’s chest rose and fell rapidly as she panted from the insertion.

You sat up and hovered over the girl with one free arm. You leaned down towards her lips just brushing yours against hers. She tried to lean up and connect your lips but you backed away. She let out a whine which quickly turned into a gasp as you abruptly sped up your fingers.

“Fuck!” She gasped.

Your fingers were increasing in pace, they also were starting to cramp but you pushed through it. The only sounds being heard were the slapping of your palm against her vagina and the moans spewing from Jenna’s mouth. You slowed your pace and curled your fingers and instantly hit the spongy spot inside her walls. Jenna let out a scream as she now gripped your forearm.

You felt her walls pulsating around your fingers. A few more curls and Jenna’s back arched to the sky as her walls trapped your fingers and you felt hot liquid around them. Her jaw fell open as choked moans came out from her intense orgasm. After a moment, Jenna started to relax and you pulled your fingers out.

“You taste delicious” You smirked as you licked her cum off your fingers. She looked at you with half-lidded eyes and a smirk.

After you finished cleaning her off your fingers, you leaned down and captured her lips. She moaned as she tasted herself on your tongue. You took this time to position yourself over her entrance. You broke the kiss for a moment to grab a condom from your dresser, rolling it on your hardened shaft, and lining yourself up before capturing her lips again.

Slowly, you pushed yourself inside her. Jenna broke the kiss as her eyes rolled to the back of her head.

You loved seeing her like this, so vulnerable. It was only for your eyes and you couldn’t get enough of it. You bottom out in her as she clenched around you at the feeling of you being deep in her.

“Shit” You hissed as a deep groan escaped your mouth.

Jenna’s eyes snapped to you as she watched your face twist in pleasure. She wanted that godly sent sound to escape your lips again.

“Pick me up” Jenna mumbled.

You obeyed her request and sat up on her your knees with her in your arms. You hooked your arms around the back of her knees and gripped her cheeks with your hands.

Instead of starting slow this time, your hips snapped into a quick pace. Nails dug into your shoulder blades making moon crescent-shaped indents. Your lips attached themselves to her collarbone, bruising up the area with love marks.

"F-F-Fuck Jah" Jenna cried out. Her hips bucked wildly as you hit the right spot inside her. Sweat cling to your forehead as you concentrated on bringing her into a blissful state. But there was something in the back of your head telling you this was wrong. But you ignored it and focused on the trembling woman in your arms.

I can definitely handle you…

A devilish smirk grew on your face. You were going to have fun with her tonight. You stopped your thrusts, much to her dismay. You laid her down back on the bed, her legs now resting on your shoulders. You interlock your fingers with hers and start going to town.

Jenna looked down at the sight of your stick, glistening from her arousal, disappearing inside of her. The knot in her stomach tightened and her walls fluttered around you, signaling how close she was. So naturally, your pace sped up to an inhuman one. Your headboard knocks against the wall.

“Yes, don’t stop!” Jenna sobbed.

A couple more thrusts and immediately Jenna saw stars. The knot in her stomach snapped and she arched into you once more, no sound escaping her lips as her second orgasm ripped through her harsher than the first one. She expected you to stop and let her catch her breath but you did the opposite. You kept thrusting into the girl, fucking her through her orgasm.

“W-W-Wait baby” She hissed as her eyes widen from you continuing. She removed her right hand from yours and pushed it against your pelvis, trying to get you to stop and let her catch her breath.

"Nah" You smirked.

Her legs fell from your shoulders, effectively giving you more access to go deeper. At the feeling of you being deeper, Jenna tried to scoot away from you.

"Nah, where you going?" You said. You flipped her onto her stomach. You pulled her ass towards you and you inserted yourself back into her before she could properly take a breath. A long dragged-out moan escaped her lips. Your hands gripped her hips, forcing the girl to move back onto you.

Jenna’s eyes slammed shut and she buried her face into the pillow. But a gasp was muffled by the pillow escaped her as you delivered a sharp hard thrust.

“Fuck!” Jenna screamed. You smirked as you delivered more sharp thrusts. Choked moans spilled from her mouth until she felt herself tremble. She was sent into another orgasm, her third one for the night.

“I can’t. I-I-I can’t baby” She sobbed as she tried running from you once more.

Your hand went around her throat and you pulled her up against you. You kissed her jawline as your other hand explored her body.

“Give me one more baby girl” Your voice dripped with lust. It was deeper and raspier which made Jenna swoon. You littered her neck with hickeys as she reached behind you and slid her fingers through your hair.

You started slow this last time, setting a smooth pace for both of you. Her heavenly pants went straight into your ear as she rested her head on your shoulder.

“You feel so good” You stated with a groan.

Her fourth and final orgasm was quickly approaching. You were almost there too, you wanted to cum together for the final one. Jenna knew you were close to exploding by the way your hands gripped her hips tighter. She purposely clenched around you which made you hiss and bury your face into her neck.

“Baby…look at…me” Jenna moaned.

You didn't want to look at her because you knew if you do, you'll be a goner. But Jenna wasn't having that, she tugged your hair and forced you to look at her. One look into her eyes had you gone, your hips stuttered as you felt yourself empty into the condom.

“Oh fuck” You groaned and gripped her hips tighter. You knew that was going to leave a bruise.

At the sight of you reaching your climax, Jenna cried out, incoherent words escaping her as she climaxed for the final time tonight. You held her close to you as she trembled in your arms. The two of you shared lazy kisses as you calmed down from tonight's activities. Both of you have tired smiles on your faces.

You pulled out her and she whined from the loss and overstimulation. You pulled the used condom off you, tied it up, and threw it into the trashcan beside your bed. The both of you laid back down on the bed. You lay on your back with your arm behind your head as Jenna cuddled up to your side. It wasn't long until Jenna's breath evened out, signaling that she was asleep and you were following her.

a/n: I also change my mind constantly on everything so the fans/public still don't know...yet cause I have a plan for that *insert evil smile*

taglist: @grandpatrolnut @raven-ss @fanboy7794 @morganismspam23 @cinffy23 @darklron @cheesybacon1 @octavias-next-meat-bite @playboysaleen @niqmandu @zaclewiss @yescruzzzzzzz @silentfor @gemz5 @alwaysdangerouschild @onceblinkarmyandmore @melonfruit442 @zataracloud @nepobaby08 @jennasslut @rimaybank @jaewu @j3nc0re

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for being half human and half machine?

i (???M) used to be human until i died in my workshop behind the old arcade, and my body and organs were stuffed inside an arcade cabinet i was working on, where i ended up merging with it. after discovering me, the employees of the arcade kind of just put me in there.

i was pretty happy with how things were going, everyone wanted to play me, may or may not have been because i was in their minds and driving them to madness but maybe they were predisposed to madness? who knows??? i also ate the occasional maintenance man. i heard word that the arcade would be going out of business because of some kind of portable gaming devices from japan.

it was pretty empty after that until around christmas eve, where a pair of people would break into the arcade, painting on my skin, breaking me and taking my quarters, bashing in my face with a crowbar, kicking me and pushing me over. until they saw my blood on their sneakers.

so i ate both of them.

honestly i feel like i was fully justified here but i guess killing and eating people is “wrong” and “bad.” and also the driving people crazy thing. i only wanted to have fun, man.

[cosmerelists]

My Top 10 Favorite Stormlight Fights...That DON'T Involve Kaladin

I wanted to do an overall “top fights” list but I found that were all, uh, just Kaladin. So Kaladin’s best fights will be saved for a future post, probably, but for now--let’s give some love for those epic fights that DON’T involve our most dramatic hero.

[SPOILERS FOR ALL OF STORMLIGHT ARCHIVES!]

10: Adolin (and Renarin!) vs. the Thunderclast [Oathbringer]

This one makes the Top 10 for me mostly because of how cool it must have been in theory...although tragically we never do actually get to see Renarin fight the Thunderclast. I mean, Adolin's part is still very cool--gotta love the one guy without Radiant powers nevertheless trying to fight a giant stone monster from ages past. And then Renarin comes and defeats it off-screen, and that is cool enough to make this list even though we don't see it.

#9: Moash vs. Leshwi [Oathbringer]

This is such a short fight, and it probably wouldn't make the Top 10 for most people...but I thought it was cool. We have Moash facing off against a Fused--one of the first Fused we ever see--with a Shardblade, only to realize that he can't beat her with that weapon, so he grabs a simple spear instead (my heart!). Then he gets lashed to the sky...but pulls her with him and stabs her in the chest. And so he kills her, and Lewshi being Leshwi, she's like, "Okay. You're legit and I like you." So kind of a cool character-building moment for both of them!

#8: Adolin & Dalinar & Elhokar vs. the Chasmfiend [Way of Kings]

This fight didn't do it for me one a first read, because frankly I didn't care that much about the Dalinar chapters in Book 1 because I was always waiting to get back to Kaladin. But upon a reread and a re-reread, I liked it much more! Like so many early fights in Way of Kings, it felt like a sort of tutorial for how the powers work, here focusing on how Shardblades and Chasmfiends Work. You get to see Adolin & Dalinar work well together despite their conflicts, and you get to see Elhokar being, well, Elhokar.

#7: Adolin’s Duels [Words of Radiance]

Except for the last one, to keep this ranking Kaladin-free! But Adolin's pre-Whitespine-Uncaged duels were also very legit. Adolin is a great swordsman, and that makes him fun to watch (well, read about). And I loved the way that he had a different way to mess with his opponent in every duel, from unhinged battery to slowly picking apart the other guy's armor. It's great to see someone good at dueling get to do what they're best at.

#6: Szeth vs. an entire party [Way of Kings]

I'm referring to when Szeth assassinated King Hanavanar of Jah Keved...while the guy was holding a big dinner party. And while this scene is a little painful to read, since Szeth slaughters everyone while crying, if memory serves, you gotta be a little impressed by the way Szeth is able to kill an entire room of people, many of whom are armed with Shardblades or half-shards. At one point he even tosses his sword away and goes hand-to-hand with people holding deadly weapons and just slaughters them all, no problem. That guy is frightening good at murder.

#5: Navani vs. Raboniel vs. Moash [Rhythm of War]

Some fights are cool because they involve visually stunning moves or epic swordplay. Some are cool because they rip my heart into a million pieces. This is one of the latter! Navani killing Raboniel is gut-wrenchingly tragic but also so cool (the Fused are impossible to kill and yet, Navani does it)...and then Moash shows up. The confrontation between Moash and Navani was an emotional beat I didn't know I needed until it was happening...and listen, I am SUCH a sucker for self-sacrifice. Raboniel grabbing Moash to let Navani escape, even after Navani killed her? I'll never be over it.

#4: Szeth vs. Gavilar [Way of Kings]

I mean, this one is a true classic. It's the first fight we see, and serves as a basic tutorial on how stormlight and Shardblades work. We have Szeth in the opening of Way of King, going to assassinate Gavilar. He lashes people and things left and right. He's on the ceiling and the walls. He's burning souls and cutting holes in the building. He's desperately fighting Gavilar in what is probably Gavilar's only cool scene in all of the books. It's just classic.

#3: Shallan vs. An Entire Army [Oathbringer]

I'm not sure this would make a "Top Fights" list for very many people, but it is one of my personal favorites. This refers to the Battle of Thaylen Field (yes, Kaladin is in the background but that doesn't count as involvement), when Shallan, Veil, & Radiant summon hordes of alters to distract the Odium-crazed army. Not only does she fend off an entire army single-handedly (holy shit, Shallan), but she does so despite the fact that it is her being killed over and over again in thousands of forms. The image of her, Radiant, and Veil holding hands as she struggles to stay conscious is incredibly powerful to me. And Jasnah goes to help! A+ fight.

#2: Adolin & Maya vs. the Tukari [Rhythm of War]

This is one of my all-time favorite fights. It takes place in Shadesmar, when Adolin runs to help Notum who is being stabbed and beaten by a group of Tukari, Not only is it a heroic fight against grossly mismatched odds, which I always love, but it also demonstrates the bond between Maya & Adolin. And when the two of them fight back to back using the kata... *chef's kiss*

#1: Dalinar vs. Odium [Oathbringer]

I'm aware that Kaladin is, like, in the background here, but the actual conflict between Dalinar & Odium does not involve him. And this isn't a physical fight--there's no clashing of Shardblades or running on the ceiling--but damn if this fight doesn't hit hard. Dalinar fights with a book and with his whole soul, and he refuses to give up his pain or to absolve himself of the guilt of what he's done. This might be one of the most powerful moments in any book, so it gets the top spot here!

What are your guys' favorite non-Kaladin fights? Let me know in the comments, if you want!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for jerkin' it to Goya's Black Paintings?

Emojis for convenience and humor: 🎨🖼🍆💦

I know someone's gonna yell bait about this but idc, like, what? Do you want proof? Video evidence? Grow up.

So I (30x) really like Goya's Black Paintings. Like, Saturn Devouring His Son, Duel with Cudgels, A Pilgrimage to San Isidro. I think they're hypnotic, beautiful, evocative. They make me feel emotions I can't quite explain properly.

As the title says, sometimes I beat my meat to them. Whatever. It's not really about horniness. But the intent doesn't matter.

Recently (in a discussion about sexuality in art, I promise it was relevant, similar sentiments were being shared) I mentioned to my partner (33nb) that I do this. They were pretty taken aback.

Apparently, they find this 'gross' and 'kind of dodgy' because Goya's black paintings were never intended to be shared with a wider audience. They were art that he did not mean to share, painted on the walls of his house near the end of his life. They say it seems like the work is too personal to jerk off to, that it seems invasive or like a violation.

I don't think it's a big deal. The guy is dead, it's not like his ghost knows what I'm doing. It's a good thing to consider, but I don't think it ultimately matters, ethically.

So, I guess AITA for this?