#JUST SAYIN for future mistakes
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:3c
I SWEAR TUMBLR KEEPS NOT NOTIFYING MEEEE
but i literally received 2 pieces of fanart 2day i love 2day 🩷🩷‼️‼️
ALSO ALSO a random thing i only recently noticed rn isssss that melody is wearing glassesss…. Which she actually doesn’t have them 😭 the lil shapes near her eyes are just face marks (like an actual ladybug yk the white things near their head) that doesn’t matter doe like you nailed everything else!!!!
((but im ok w/ melody wearing glasses …. She lowk looks cute w/ them on !!!!! don’t feel ashamed btw 😭 . i prolly shoulda made that clearer but OH WELL.)))
back to the art doe , I LOVE THE WAY U DRAW HER……. Yummy yummy anatomy!!!! I like they way u draw the bugsonas sm i cant get over it rn 🩷🐞
#btw random art suggestion for future fan-artists :3#Melody is a lipstick (pink) ladybeetle as of now!!#So I recommend avoiding drawing her w/ spots!! (We dont talk abt my hella hella outdated tumblr banner w/ her old design))#JUST SAYIN for future mistakes#i’ve only confirmed her new species today so uh#:3#🩷🐞#🎀 melody (sona)#for me#fav#fanrart#gift#a little ankofan69 once told me
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LISTEN I KNOW HOW IT SOUNDS BUT I SWEAR HE WAS DISTINCT FROM RGGJO STILL 😭😭😭 HIS DESIGN WAS LOUD IN A DIFFERENT WAY 😭😭😭😭😭 though As A Whole it was probably the result of someone saying he should go full RGGJo in 8 several months prior to when I had the dream, so not wrong. But it would be fun to see a shift from "Nothing in life matters...😞" to "Nothing in life matters! 😎" would it not...
I've always thought Drink Link was meant to evoke Social Link? Because in Japan it was called #DRAMA. I was never the biggest fan because it's one of many "translations" in Y7 that are just changing something that was already in English and doesn't require cultural context to understand. Like IMO whether it's seen as an improvement or not, it's just not the localizers' job to "improve on" the original; let them be cringe and let them be free...
And also it gave ammunition to Persona fans who refuse to experience anything but P5 and decided to go "wow! it's just like P5!" at every little thing Y7 did from the VERY FIRST trailers onward (including BE AN RPG) And That Shit Got Old Fast </3 Sorry </3 But I do think this one's very much on purpose, localization-wise. So I forgive you :)
RANTING ASIDE. OR. SEGUEING INTO MORE RANTING. Literally like I don't even care if it's as part of the Kasugang or Kiryu's Geezer Squad... Give Jo five minutes with Tendo or hand him over to me so I can make sure he's enriched and well-nourished... these are my demands... that man is my everything......
Because it would be SO funny both ways. We don't know who all will be in each party, so either he's stuck with Adachi (Definitely A Character) (Affectionate) (Also Has Already Told Him He'd Rather Kill Him Than Send Him To Jail So. Awkward) or maybe with Kiryu's he'd have more people around his agw, But if not, The Inherent Comedy of two bitches called Jo and Joryu who have almost the same haircut 💀💀
Exactly though, nobody in the Arakawa Family is neurotypical and I FULLY believe Jo would be at his best when put into Situations, like Mine is. It's something I reeeally miss from RGGO because of the pre-finale scene with RGGJo and Mitsu having a drink at their favorite bar... they haven't been there in a while, and RGGJo doesn't wanna spoil the mood, so he's not hostile in the slightest... and when he gets up to leave he says he "forgot his wallet" and makes Mitsu foot the bill (ICONIC for completely different reasons depending on whether he's telling the truth or not)... whereas in Y7 I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF THE ARAKAWAS HAVE A FAVORITE BAR
it could be funny- whiplash inducing, but that'd undoubtedly be why it'd be funny wouldn't it ♪(´▽`) he could've been some sacred third thing- just more RGGJo influence injected in Y7Jo mayhaps..
anyhow it dont sound like you forgive me when you just got mad at persona players for makin comparisons and here ive gone and done such a thing LMAO(;´д`)(;´д`)in any case, i know how you feel about translations so i wont press the topic: if it aint broke etc etc, i understand how you feel so it's ok (❁´◡`❁;;)
double 'jo' def woulda been funny, if not has always been a small thing worth jokin bout that ive had in the back of my mind (though ive already said that: i have a broken record of a brain at this point, if not that it just points out how silly i find the idea) LMAO. i've always enjoyed antag-turned-party member anyhow, so it wouldve been fun to me regardless of what it brought ♪(´▽`)
#long post#snap chats#i say unnecessary things a lot so its easy for me to say something upsetting oops (´▽`;;;)#its a habit im trying to break- to speak concisely instead of without aim. though if im realistic im not sure i can do that#i can only ask please be patient with me for saying annoying things in the future (❁´◡`❁)#im sure it'll happen a lot by accident and has already happened (❁´◡`❁ ;; ) so ill make sure to remember whats most bothersome (❁´◡`❁)#before my organs shut down on me let me move on OWOWOW#i remember the bit in rggo where jo forgot his wallet i truly couldnt stop myself from sayin My Guy Cmon 😭 ☠️☠️#in the case of rggjo its fun to imagine his forgetfulness as ambiguous cause Truly Did He Mean To Forget Or 🤨#in the case of y7jo its harder to believe hed do it on purpose so in the case where he does its just ☠️☠️#bros Truly losin it.... his mind AND his wallet... i know ichi gon make a joke 😔#aside from that though maybe jo would benefit from having friends his age <- saying this as if he's in grade school ☠️☠️#in the case of the arakawas having a personal favorite bar tho... i couldnt say#ive already made an assessment of jo's sociability through his office so i wanna make a half-confident bet he doesnt like to get out much#lest it's required for Whatever Reason- but what about arakawa then ? much to consider..#i honestly couldnt wager what he'd prefer.. i dont know what atmosphere he'd like... he's too mysterious for me (´▽`;;)#for some reason i can only ever imagine him drinking at home or at quaint restaurants...#idk cant explain it... thats just the vibe... very likely im wrong though..#my organs truly hurt now- i think i gave myself a headache by mistake so ill have to stop my pondering before i explode (´▽`;;)
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Now Playing: Falling in Love
[Mammon - Paper Rings]
Pairing: Mammon x GN!Reader Genre: Comfort/Fluff Summary: His partner in crime. His confidant. His best friend. His human. Even if he likes shiny things, you are the one thing he'll never trade for the world and he'll prove it. Even if it means he'll marry you with paper rings. A/N: The second installment of Now Playing: Falling in Love is here!! Took a while but it's here nonetheless. I'm finally finished with my school work so I can do all the things I've been planning to do (≧▽≦) This time, I chose the song "Paper Rings" by Taylor Swift! The song's just screaming Mammon's name, don't you agree? And I also get the feeling Mammon will like listening to Taylor's songs ^^ Warning: Reader's family is pressuring reader and Mammon to get married (get slapped with toxic family culture 😬); not proofread, maybe a bit OOC but I kinda liked how this turned out so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Now Playing: Falling in Love playlist MASTERLIST
"I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings
Uh huh, that's right
Darling, you're the one I want
In paper rings, in picture frames, in dirty dreams
Oh, you're the one I want"
"So, when are you two getting married?"
That question almost made Mammon spit out the water from his mouth.
"Oh, uh..."
"Aunty!!" You gave your aunt an incredulous look. However the older woman only ignored you, too focused on squeezing the answer from Mammon.
"What's wrong with asking? There's nothing wrong in asking about your future plans. You both are in your prime years. If you don't get married, you'll lose the chance to build your own family! Look at your cousin Daniel–"
"Aunty!" You cut her off before she makes things more awkward. "Look, I know you're worried for us, but marriage... it's just not in our priority list yet. We will get married in the future but not right now."
Your last statement made Mammon blush a little. You want to get married to him in the future?
Suddenly, you stand up from your chair and grabbed his arm. "C'mon, Mammon. I think we're done here for the day."
Before he can speak, you started dragging him from his chair and out of your family house.
.
.
.
"Hey, you alright?" Mammon asked.
It's been a while since the two of you returned to your shared hotel room, but you haven't said a single word since then.
"I'm sorry."
The demon raised an eyebrow on your sudden words of apology. "What're you apologizin' for?"
"For my aunt's behavior earlier. She put you on the spot. That must've been uncomfortable for you."
Sighing, you continued.
"I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to introduce you to my family during the reunion. I forgot why I stopped attending them in the first place."
Seeing you curl in on yourself made Mammon's heart ache.
"Hey... Why should you be the one apologizing on her behalf? Your aunt's the one who's in the wrong, not you."
It was your turn to be confused by his words. "...What?"
"I'm just sayin'. You shouldn't be the one who's sorry whenever your family made a mistake," Mammon says as he took your left hand comfortingly.
You blinked, left speechless by what he said.
Suddenly, he slipped a paper ring on your ring finger.
"Mammon??" You gaped when he did that.
"Don't tell me you forgot what you said earlier."
What you said...?
...
"We will get married in the future but not right now."
...
You blushed when you remembered what you said before storming out of your family house. You just promised you will marry Mammon in the future.
The demon chuckled as he kissed your finger where the paper ring is.
"You said you'll marry me when the time comes. So I hope you'll say yes when I manage to make this paper ring a real ring."
#Spotify#now playing: falling in love series#now playing: falling in love with mammon#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me x reader#obey me mammon#obey me mammon x reader#mammon x reader#obey me mammon fluff#obey me fluff#obey me comfort#cookie writings
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flowers - matt sturniolo
warnings: toxic relationship, use of y/n, cheating?, angst, fluff? no happy ending
summary: in which a relationship you thought could turn into a life long commitment turns sour when you reliaze that your boyfriend isnt the same loving guy you met
note: I hope I did this song justice as its one of my favorite songs ALSO NOT SAYING MATT WOULD DO THIS IRL THIS IS A FIC
bold - lyrics
matt x reader
took me over to you house to meet your family
you were always scared to meet any of your boyfriends family because it seemed like a reoccurring pattern that you would fall apart shortly after, so when matt first suggested to go to boston with him and his brothers, you politly declined. you kept declining, every time he asked. he finally convinced you, which was surprising to you. so here you are in boston, at his house. meeting his parents.
introuduced me to them sayin' that you'd marry me
when you walked through that door, you were severely overwhelmed. it didn't help when matt's mom, marylou, asked if you guys were serious when you first walked into the door and of course matt said
"of course. I'm going to marry her, she's my forever"
then you'd look me in the eye and say, "it's just a joke"
after interacting and bonding with his family, matt pulled you aside and told you what he said earlier was just a joke. you laughed it off. it was just a joke.
then you'd kiss me and i'd smile, did you even know?
he kissed you after. I smiled, weather it was fake or not I smiled. if it was just a joke and it meant nothing why did that make you feel the way it did. it wasn't like you were actually that serious or have talked about your future together. it didn't matter. at least that's what you told yourself.
when you'd say that kinda thing, I'd be excited
even though that's what you told yourself, you knew you wanted a future with matt, deep down. so saying that he wanted to marry you got you all giddy inside. it made you happy.
got me hopin' maybe one day you would mean it
as the night when on that's all you could think about. your future together. how matt would propose, everything.
always thought I'd make a fool of someone else
you were a shy kid. you silently judged people for the clothes they wore, or the way they talked just cause you were insecure. yeah, it wasn't your finest moment. you always thought you would finally say that out loud to one of the popular kids but you never did.
now you've only gone and me make one of myself
what a foolish thing to think. thinking back maybe planning for a future you and matt didn't have, was your biggest mistake.
i guess the flowers aren't just used for big apologies
matt loved giving you flowers. it was one of his favorite things to do. weather it was for a date night or after a fight. he always gave you flowers. maybe that was part of your downfall. a simple gesture could save everything
i guess I should've been more conscious how you spoke to me
i should have read between the lines of what matt was actually saying when he said all these amazing things like
"we'll be together forever" or "I love you"
'cause when we fight, you'd give me space, and not communicate
matt was shut off with his feelings. he really only spoke about feelings with his brothers which was hard on you. one night you had this pretty heated fight. lets just say there were multiple tears shed, and strained voices. matt of course being the person he is gave you space thinking that's what you needed. problem was he didn't communicate how to make the situation better for the future if it happened again, which got you into the on going cycle.
and for a while, I thought that's what I should appreciate.
at first you thanked him. you always had a problem with needing to calm down by yourself after getting overwhelmed by a fight. you soon realized however, that you wanted that space by your side to be filled by your boyfriend. you wanted his comfort. you never tried to talk about it with him however. you knew it wouldn't go well.
maybe I was holdin' on to what I thought you were
you thought maybe the main reason you didn't want to talk to him about your feelings with the subject was because you were scared. scared that he wasn't the same person he was when you first met. maybe he wasn't that same boy that was the kindest, most sweetest person ever. maybe you just made it all up in your head.
but when you think to hard eventually, it starts to hurt.
you drifted your mind away from those thoughts as much as you could however. it hurt your emotionally and physically thinking about how matt had possibly changed.
the version of you in my head, now I know, wasn't true.
looking back I should have known that what I had planned in my head was not real. how could it have been. of course it was a fantasy. it was just a mask covering the true pain you felt from matt not being there for you.
young people fall for the wrong person, guess my one was you.
growing up you always heard that you will have to go through a big turning point before you find your one true love. you thought you had that with matt. but unfortunately for you he was your big turning point.
i was gettin' any flight, so we could make it work
eventually you had to move away from LA to pursue the career that you have always dreamed of. you being you of course, decided not to break up and just work long distance (big mistake). every chance you had, any time off you would get on that plane and fly back to LA to keep making this work. it was only you doing this however. never him
you'd ignore me, could've told me you were seeing her
there were times when the two of you weren't together that matt would ignore you. you reassured yourself that he was just busy. but when nick and chris immediately responded to a text right away, you knew it was him. back in LA matt had met a girl. 'we are just friends' he said, 'i have a girlfriend' he always reassured his friends and brothers. but was it really true? and of course you had no knowledge of this.
kinda hate myself for justifying your mistakes
every single time matt made a mistake you easily forgave him, whether it was something big or little, it didn't matter. you always forgave him. he just had to use those puppy dog eyes that you now hate so much, and give you flowers and you forgave him. you scolded yourself for that now.
took a minute, but I learned that shit the hard way
he repeated mistakes over and over and over again and you always let it slide. even if he did the same mistakes twice.
'he was just drunk' you told yourself
'he would never purposely do that to you' every little thing in your head was just your way of telling yourself that you didn't have a healthy relationship with matt anymore, you just didn't want to admit it.
who are you to tell me I cant be heartbroken?
when the break up came you were kind of anticipating it. after dealing with the same shit for months it was bound to happen. it just came to a shock when matt mentioned it first. of course once again getting into a headed fight, you said you should break up and even though he was the one to mention it he blamed you for breaking what they had. if you had anything in the first place.
"you don't get to be hurt about this y/n you're the one who suggested it" matt yelled at you
it didn't make sense because he was the one to bring it up first.
babe, you had the chance. the door for you was open
he had his chance. he blew his chance. it was not something that he could just recover with flowers again. you were ready to give him everything, even though you knew his behavior was toxic. but he threw that all away.
if it's what you need to tell yourself to sleep at night
hearing the news of the girl he once actually loved moving on, he felt heartbroken. she had never looked happier, which was somehow worse. the girl that was the cause of all this was of course, using him for his fame. making the whole situation 100 times worse. every day he lay awake struggling to fall asleep. thinking about the times that they were happy. 'she was happier with me back then'. at least that's what he told himself.
pretend I havent found a man who finally treats me right
moving on was a rigorous process yet it was rewarding. getting away from what toxic relationship you had prior, was like a detox. you found a man who finally treated you with kindness. helped you calm down after a heated fight, didn't buy flowers every time he messed up. your life was great.
matt's life on the other hand was terrible. this was karma. to all the shit he had done to you, every time he played with your feelings, your brain. he pretended like you hadn't moved on. he pretended it was still real between you and one day you would find your way back to each other.
if there's anything I've learned, it's you should watch yourself
if there was anything you could take away from your relationship with matt, was to pay attention to the little things. the little things that don't help.
if it's hurting you, then leave and go and get some help
note:
guys I hope you liked it. writing will be slow from now on. but I love this song and I wanted to make a one shot of it right now.
#sturniolo triplets#chris sturniolo#matt sturniolo#nick sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo imagine#christopher sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo imagine#sad sturniolo imagine#sturniolo angst#angst#Spotify
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same ol' mistakes | j. uso
summary: ginger loves her man. her friends... want her to get over her man, but sometimes mistakes need to be made a couple of times.
warnings: none.
word counts: 1.6
author's note: welcome to part three of the anti one shots! find part one and two here! not really sure how I feel about this one, but here we are. might rewrite in the future. i have a couple ones left! pls ignore the lowercase and errors.. ofc x
"feel like a brand new person (but you make the same ol mistakes)”
“ginger is now a ginger!” nia whistles.
my hair flows down my back as she touches a piece. i can’t contain a laugh as cathy whistles alongside nia, gawking at the new look i picked up over the weekend. the higher ups agreed it was time for a new look to match my new persona. so, when it was time to sit in my stylists chair, my jet black hair was replaced with something a little more edgy.
“you guys like it, honest, i wasn’t sure how it’d look with my skin tone.” i shrug, taking a seat beside bianca.
bianca rolls her eyes, “you kidding? c’mon black women can rock any hair color they want.”
it was the truth, i guess, so we sit in our group and watch the start of smackdown. in a rare occasion, the bloodline weren’t the ones to start the show. from the corner of my eye, i can see jimmy staring at me. he looks shocked at the hair change, and it takes everything in me not to react at him - not when bianca and nia were right beside me.
“look who watchin” nia murmurs.
caught. I feign confusion in her direction, but she can see through me. she’s always been good at calling my bullshit; that’s why she’s my accountability partner in figuring my relationship out with jimmy.
nia leans in, “don’t do it, ginny.”
of course, all i can do is nod. yet, it’s hard to ignore him. for two years, we were attached at the hip - correction: for two years we’ve been on-again-off-again boyfriend and girlfriend. my friends were tired of hearing the shitty things and consoling me every time we were off again. i don’t know what it is, but we just can’t seem to figure it out and we can’t seem to let each other go. love is a mysterious and trifling thing.
“well, i don’t care, im in love”
the match left my shoulders burning in pain. bianca walks ahead of me out of the guerilla. i’m nearly in stride with her until a hand touches my shoulder. jimmy smiles sweetly - that dumbass, goofy smile that i love so much.
“you looked good out there with yo’ hair, gin.” he compliments with his sweet voice.
“thanks jim, i appreciate that.” my voice soft, unsure what to say.
jimmy opens his mouth to say something else, but bianca clears her throat. she sends me a death glare but gives jimmy a sweet grin. she comes back to take my hand, shooting a comment at jimmy before she pulls me away from him.
“ginger, don’t piss me off, it’s been two weeks.”
i sigh heavily, “he was just complimenting the match, B.”
bianca whips her head towards me, “I don’t care if he was sayin’ a prayer, be serious.”
how do i explain to my friends that this isn’t what i want anymore - the hovering, the pestering and questioning and disappointment. the disappointed looks when i even mention his name is killing me slowly. this wasn’t what i wanted anymore and when i glance back at jimmy, i knew it.
“i can just hear them now, how could you let us down?”
happy hour came and went, but i couldn’t move from my seat at the bar for several hours. the uber ride home felt miserable and the text messages from the girls didn’t help the vomit that was threatening to spew from my lips. i barely made it through the door before i could rush to the bathroom.
“fuck!” the scream came out of my mouth.
this shouldn’t be my life. why am i scared to talk to the one person i want more than anything else in the world. fuck it. the ringing lasted a second before his voice came through the speaker.
“ginny?” he was asleep. “you good?”
my nerves set in for a moment - this was dumb but i couldn’t back out of this now.
“i don’t want to do this anymore. i don’t want to not talk to you because the girls are telling me not to. i don’t want us to not try and figure it out when i know in my heart that we’re meant to be together and we just need to stop fucking around and make it work.” my words spill out before i can stop them. “i don’t care if it’s the same fucking mistakes, i want to make them until we figure it out.”
he’s silent for a moment, but i can hear his breath on the other end before he clears his throat. “i love you, ginger, ain’t nobody gone change that or ever make me stop.”
“not thinking in black and white.. thinking it’s worth the fight”
there’s a nervousness that’s settled in my chest. I wonder if they’ll know the second that they see me every time - will they know that me and jimmy are on again? that nervousness has overtaken every moment when im with them now. It’s been a month and I can’t sit and pretend like this isn’t happening. my mind is just a mess.
“ginny, you okay, you have this weird smile on your face.” nia pokes my cheek.
it’s become difficult to focus on anything else, while i was happy to be back with jimmy it’s been stressful to keep such a big secret from the women i trust more than anyone else in the world.
“nah, im good, just lost in my own world.” i mumble back a quick reply.
thankfully, the women turn back to their conversation. in the brief moment, i glance over at jimmy whose sitting with his cousin and of course he’s already watching me. he sends me a goofy smile that i can’t help but to smile back at before quickly glancing away. i just want to be near him.
and as the night ticked on, my restlessness only increased.
bianca kept an eye on me like i was a child who’d run the second they got their chance. it was suffocating. we sat in one of the makeshift viewing areas backstage, escaping the clutter of the women’s locker room, for a moment. jimmy sat not too far, sneaking glances at me.
subtlety wasn’t his thing, because bianca threw random comments at me about needing to stay strong.
“nia, please remind ginny.” bianca sighs when the older woman sits beside me. “she’s sharing looks with him.” her voice drops to a whisper as she leans across to me.
my hands draw circles on my thigh as nia starts her pointless, and slightly demeaning lecture.
“you’re better than this ginger…” she starts like a scolding mother.
the tears sting the brim of my eyelids. i sneak a glance at jimmy who has a scowl on his face. he can see it written on my face.
“we only want what’s best for you,” bianca chimes in.
i couldn’t get a word edgewise as they continue. it's like a game of tennis and I'm the net in the middle, being jabbed by either player.
“your happiness is all that matters to us,” nia rests an arm on my shoulder.
they continue, not sensing how over this whole situation i am, and finally i can’t help but let the tears fall. i’m not quick to wipe the tears, just stuck in my position trying not to go into a full blown anxiety attack in that moment. my eyes finds jimmy as he’s getting up and walking towards us.
bianca looks up at him, “jimmy, this isn’t-”
“nah, Bianca,” he stops her immediately. “you know i got love for you and nia, but ease up on Ginger. She grown and don’t need y’all talkin’ to her like she a kid. I don’t appreciate you makin’ her cry over something like this.”
the women stop, they look at me and finally see the result of their words. i can see the regret on their face. bianca wipes some of the tears off my cheek, whispering how sorry she was.
“y’all her friends, I get that, but she should be able to tell y’all anything. But y’all got her feelin’ like she gotta keep secret because you do shit like this. We got back together and we workin’ on us but she can’t do it because she worried about y’all.”
jimmy grabs my hand, helping me up from between the women. all i can do is stare at him too afraid to look at them or the disapproval on their faces. we walk away as i try to wipe the tears that are streaming down my face. we’re halfway down the hallway before we stop, hearing nia’s voice.
“ginny,” her and bianca wait until i turn to continue. “i’m sorry, love, we just wanted to protect you but we never want you to feel like you can’t talk to us.”
bianca nods, “we’re sorry gin, you know we’ll support you.” she looks at jimmy. “the both of you. we overstepped and we won’t do that again.”
i stare at them for a moment before breaking out a grin and pulling them into a hug, “I love you guys,” i laugh before moving away. “I know you want to protect me, but i gotta figure my own shit out and i swear, i love this man and you don't have to hear the bullshit anymore.”
“girl, if you don’t tell us how are we supposed to beat his ass?” nia jokes, smacking jimmy’s arm. “you can talk to us.”
jimmy takes me hand into his and twirls me into his arm. “so, we can kiss in public again, gin?”
the girls groan playfully as I roll my eyes with a nod.
should i start a tag list?? would people want to join it? x
#wwe#wwe fanfiction#wwe fic#wwe imagine#wwe raw#wwe smackdown#the bloodline#the usos#jimmy uso imagine#jimmy uso#jimmy uso x reader#jimmy uso fanfiction
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Mafia AU Part 9
Part 8
Eddie tied his hair up in a ponytail and put a hat on top. He took the bus again, walking the last bit to the Harrington estate. When he arrived, Steve came down the stairs. The night of the party, Eddie was sure he’d seen the evidence of a handprint on the omega’s face. There was nothing there now. Nothing to suggest that his father was anything less than respectful.
Steve tossed some car keys to him, which he only fumbled with for a bit before righting himself.
“You’re letting me drive?”, Eddie asked.
“Sometimes capos double as chauffeurs. Whenever it’s something that requires more discretion”, Steve explained as he led the way to the garage.
‘More discretion’. That meant they weren’t simply going out for collections. Eddie’s suspicions turned out to be correct when Steve asked if he knew the way to the docks. The sun was setting as they drove out and the sky was completely dark when they got to said docks.
Steve checked his watch. “We’re a little early. So we’ll wait. In the future, you’ll wanna time it so that we arrive right at the meeting time, maybe even a little later.”
“And why’s that your majesty?”, Eddie snarked, looking at him through the rearview mirror. Steve was looking out the window, allowing Eddie to NOT admire his profile. He was just looking. There was nothing pretty about his lips, or attractive about his nose, or fetching about his eyes, or handsome about the way it glowed under the lights of the dock.
“When people show up after the boss, they think they’re late. It makes them nervous from the get-go and more likely to make a mistake”, Steve said.
“What if you wanna make them nervous?”
Steve turned his gaze from the window to meet Eddie’s eyes through the mirror. Somehow that felt more intimate than if Eddie simply turned around. Eddie didn’t hold the gaze for long, his eyes moving away to look out the front window. Where were the bozos they were meeting?
“Is that what you do? You like to make people nervous?”, Steve asked.
“Do I make you nervous?”, Eddie asked back.
Steve smirked. “You’re like a little kitten, why would you?”
Eddie put an arm around the passenger seat and finally turned backwards. “Well, an outsider might observe that I’m an alpha, alone in a dark car with an omega, with no one else to be seen.”
Steve didn’t look phased. “Yeah, but you won’t try anything.”
Eddie quirked an eyebrow before unbuckling his seatbelt and climbing into the backseat, ignoring when Steve asked what he was doing. He didn’t even know. He just wanted to prove Steve wrong for some reason. Once he was back there, sitting across from him, Eddie didn’t know what to do with himself. Then he remembered the little game Steve had played with him earlier.
“I think you want me to try something. I think you’ve wanted it since the first day you cornered me in that room.”
Steve scoffed but Eddie could tell he hit the nail on the head.
“What? High society omega like you can’t just go for what you want? You need to be chased?”
“Of course you’d think being in the mob counts as being high society”, Steve crossed his arms then uncrossed them, realizing it looked defensive.
Eddie gestured around them. “I call ‘em as I see ‘em.”
“So do I”, Steve grinned. “And what I see is a little kitten of an alpha who won’t try anything because he hasn’t yet.”
“You sayin’ I don’t got the guts to kiss you?”, Eddie crowded towards him, pressing Steve to the door.
“You don’t”, Steve breathed out.
“I don’t think you have the guts to be kissed.”
“I’ve been kissed before.”
“By Robin?”
“What? Gross! Ew, she’s not-what the hell gave you that idea?”
“You two are attached to the hip”, Eddie said. “You let her in where no one else is allowed.”
“Because we are attached to the hip. Like those twins that are born connected. She’s like a sister to me.”
There was a pause between them as Steve realized what Eddie had thought of him and Robin and Eddie realized that he’d been wrong about Steve and Robin. Steve let his hands trail up Eddie’s sides before grabbing the lapels of his jacket.
“If that was the only thing holding you back, you’ve got no excuse now.”
Eddie, never one to back down, met him blow for blow, putting his hands on the door by Steve’s head and pushing a leg between the omega’s. The air around them felt warm and the car’s heat had been turned off a while ago.
“Think I still don’t got the guts?”
“I think if you don’t kiss me right now, you’re a coward”, Steve challenged. “So either plant one on me or-”
There was no ‘or’.
Eddie put his lips against Steve’s, hard and without finesse at first, but after Steve started to move his lips, Eddie’s softened and the kiss did too. Steve’s hands tightened their hold on his jacket, bringing Eddie in to lay his whole body down. Then they smoothed up and didn’t stop until they reached his head, where he tossed the hat off and took out his hair tie.
A low rumble left Eddie’s throat as Steve’s fingers dug into his hair, reaching his scalp and holding him in place as their kisses got longer and wetter. Steve replied with a soft moan of his own and he was wondering why Eddie hadn’t touched him yet. He traced a line along Eddie’s hand to find it still pressed against the door.
Steve wedged his under it, lacing their fingers just as a flashlight lit up the backseat. The two of them parted and Steve hoped against hope that it was the cops. That was the best case scenario.
It was not the police.
They scrambled to right themselves and Eddie put his hat back on before leaving out the other side of the car. He cleared his throat as he went to Steve’s side and opened the door for him. Steve looked just ever so slightly ravished, lips glistening in the light of the flashlight that was still on them. Eddie thought it was pretty good for a backseat makeout. Steve could have looked worse.
Apparently, the four associates they were meeting with didn’t agree. Steve handled all the talking, but it was clear that they were put off by what they had walked in on. It was obvious from their scents. Eddie just didn’t know if it was because they were middle aged guys who thought it improper to do such a thing in public or if Steve’s status had something to do with it.
They found out later when they returned and Steve’s father immediately summoned him. Eddie tried to follow but Steve put a hand to his chest, telling him to stay there in the foyer.
“It might take a while though, so you can have someone drive you home. It’s late.”
Eddie watched as Steve left, hat in his hands and hair still out. He bit his lip before cursing under his breath and going to where he knew they were. This time the door was closed, but Eddie could hear the shouting clear as day. It sounded like those guys had called pretty much as soon as he and Steve left, telling the boss how the deal had gone down.
“That’s how you lose face in this business! Dammit this is what happens when you send an omega to do an alpha’s job!”
“I don’t know what they told you, but it’s not as scandalous as all that”, Steve’s voice was firm, but Eddie wondered what his body language was like. He cracked the door just a bit to hear better, and maybe catch a whiff of the scents in the room.
“I don’t need to hear it. I know you’ve been slutting around with that mutt. What would your mother think?”
“....”
“See? You know-”
“She’d trust that I can do the job. And she’d want me to find a partner for myself. Just like she had the freedom to do.”
“Yes, well, she had a bit more sense than you.”
Steve muttered something under his breath and Eddie knew it was cutting, he just couldn’t make it out. His stomach felt tight. He wanted this man to be put in his place, but he also didn’t want Steve to come out hurt again.
“You know how I feel about the muttering. If you want to sit with the people in charge, say it with your entire chest, Steven.”
“I said that mom chose wrong. She would have been better off never meeting you. And I’m not the only one that thinks so. Everyone says i-”
There’s the sound of a body hitting a wall.
“That Munson boy is making you forget yourself. I think it’s time I made an example out of him. He can’t touch Harrington property and get away with it.”
“It’s not Eddie’s fault”, Steve said quickly. “I was the one who came onto him-”
Eddie nearly burst through the door when he heard the slap cut Steve off. Especially when it made the other young man fall completely silent.
“I’m aware of your loose morals. Why do you think I’m trying to find a decent match to lock you down? You’re lucky there are alphas who find that kind of thing attractive, at least until marriage. You will keep your legs closed. You will get that gutter scum in line. And you will learn some respect. Or this farce will end and I will have the Munsons put on a blacklist.”
“You wouldn’t. You can’t-”
There was a harder impact and this time Eddie couldn’t stand by and let it happen. He came in just in time to see the next hit and watch Steve fall to the floor as his father let him go.
“You fucking-”
“Eddie, don’t!”, Steve shouted, lifting himself up.
“Teach him well, Steven. Or I will.”
Eddie leveled a glare that would’ve sent most running for the hills, but of course the boss of a mafia family wasn’t even looking at him. He rubbed at his knuckles like punching his son was a minor reprimand and slightly inconvenient. Eddie went for Steve instead, helping him to his feet and guiding him out of the room. He had so many words brewing on his tongue, but none of them felt sufficient.
For as lacking as his own father was, Al Munson never hit him. Eddie brought Steve to his room and helped him sit down on the bed. There was a red print on his face, his lip was split, and there was definitely a bruise forming on the side opposite the handprint.
“Should I wake Robin? I know you’d rather-”, Eddie’s exit was stopped by Steve grabbing his sleeve with two fingers.
“No, you-can you-I don’t want you to leave.”
Eddie said no more about leaving, just making sure the door was locked before going to the en suite bathroom to get the first aid kit.
“I’m sorry about this. About everything”, Steve said. He hadn’t wanted Eddie to see any of this. Although he was sure he’d seen his fair share of violence, this felt more personal. It was like Eddie seeing right through everything he was. It was why he had pushed him away before.
“Hey, if I’m gonna be a capo, this is gonna all be par for the course”, he said with a shrug while sitting across from Steve and getting started with the aid. “Cleaning up your scrapes, taking care of you, all that.”
“Taking care of me, huh?”, Steve tried to smile a little.
“It ain’t no 9 to 5, but it pays the bills.”
After Eddie was done, he closed the kit and stood up. “Guess I’ll be heading out now.”
Steve stood up. “You don’t need to. We’ve got plenty of guest rooms. You can take one for the night.”
“Uh, which one should I-”
“The one next to me. The one across from me is already taken”, Steve said. “And I can’t let someone as pretty as you out in the streets this late.” He stepped closer to Eddie and curled one of his long locks around his finger. “Your hair really does look good when it’s down.”
Eddie was speechless because he’d just been called pretty and received another compliment in under a minute and Steve sounded completely genuine. He swallowed, wanting to say something in return that wasn’t a joke or cynical.
“Means a lot coming from you. Your hair’s pretty legendary in this town.”
The only reason Steve wasn’t inviting Eddie to stay in his room tonight was because they were already on thin ice with his father. If it got out that they’d stayed in the same room, let alone the same bed, it wouldn’t end well.
“Good night, Eddie”, Steve bid him before kissing his lips, keeping it short because of his injury and because it would have been easy to let it go further.
“Night, Steve.” And he was out the door.
Part 10
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I almost don't want to give the Palladinos credit here, but I half think that there was something going on offscreen with Jess around episodes 5 and 6 of Season 5 of Gilmore Girls. Episode 5 is the wretched double date episode where Luke and Dean fight, and Episode 6 is the one where Lorelai finds out that Sherry left Gigi with her worthless father and Rory seeks out Christopher and tells him to stay away from Lorelai before he screws up her life again.
I believe Jess is only mentioned in these two episodes. In the double date episode, Luke is ranting about how Dean is not good for Rory (Lorelai's response is that "their problems were mutual" and Luke "doesn't know the whole story" which is funny because those additional details would definitely not endear Luke to the guy) and Lorelai asks if she should date Jess instead (Paris AND Marty are right there, Lorelai. Just sayin').
In episode 6, Luke and Lorelai bicker over the porch light being broken and Lorelai says the last person to change it was Dean and again argues on his behalf because Jess never bothered to change the light.
At this point in the story, Rory is still dating Dean and realizing the only thing they have in common is misplaced nostalgia and is trying to corner Logan to get the lowdown on the Life and Death Brigade. Rory has her adventure with the LDB the next episode and Dean dumps her the episode after that when he sees her partying with Logan and his friends. She's in the process of moving on with her life and leaving Dean behind.
So what was going on with Jess? I figure the final rejection by Rory probably gave him the push he needed to write the book, end his mediocre "messenger" career, probably get his GED, and move to Philadelphia to start his new life (and of course, begin the Slutty Philadelphia Jess era). Obviously that doesn't happen all at once, so I figure he probably wasn't ready to move until at least the spring/fall, but things had likely begun to progress by this point and Luke probably knew he was planning to move and had mentioned it to Lorelai...who is still dubious, still pushing for Dean over Jess, still trying to rationalize Rory's affair even as the incident seems to have moved her further back into the past, not the future (and likely trying to be supportive so that Rory doesn't push her away again, because she now knows Rory can and will stop talking to her and will bring up Lorelai's own mistakes if she feels she's being too judgmental).
Meanwhile, Jess is actually moving forward offscreen instead of trying to relive his high school years. Would have been nice to see some of that.
Milo was unavailable during this time, as he was a season regular on NBC's American Dreams. They had a shortened season, but networks aren't always amenable to lending out their actors to the competition (the only other season Milo doesn't pop in as a guest star after he left the show is season 7, when he again was a regular on another NBC show). I don't think this was necessarily planned ahead of time, but the backstory works nicely for what was going on with Jess at the time.
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We are watching Twilight, William
Author's note: Fluffy One Shot to make up for the Bond to Happen angst I've been writing.
Warnings: none, fluff, tickling, popcorn throwing
Word count: 900ish
“We are watching Twilight, William. It’s my turn to pick the movie and it’s practically a crime that you’ve never seen it before.” You and Billy have a standing movie night, usually at the beginning of the week when he isn't as busy. Most often, he’d come over to your house with food or snacks and the two of you would talk about your days and enjoy a, generally subpar, movie together.
“All I wanted to know is why you kept sayin’ ‘Bella, where the hell have you been, loca?’ anytime I come over,” Billy says in exasperation and you laugh.
“You don’t have to like it, but you’ve made me sit through the Godfather twice now. I could’ve chosen something much much worse. Really, you should be grateful I chose to be nice.”
“I’m not even gonna ask what you mean by worse.” He shakes his head, grabbing the bowl of popcorn and offering it to you as the opening scene plays.
“That’s for the best, William.” You grin at him and he rolls his eyes.
“I’m gonna complain the whole time,” he warns.
“You will not! I will allow you to make fun of it, but don’t be whiny.”
“I am not whiny,” he scoffs.
“Shhhh.”
Billy was more or less a good sport through the movie, though occasionally he would make a face and look at you before saying anything.
“Go ahead,” you allow.
“So he’s been watching her sleep?”
“Yup.”
“And wants to eat her?”
“Yup.”
“And she finds that attractive?”
“More or less.”
“Do you find that attractive?” He looks at you warily.
“God no! Most of the men in this are just walking red flags.”
“Which ones aren’t?”
“Emmett is my favorite, total wholesome himbo. Carlisle is decent, though he did put his ‘kids’ who are all technically senior citizens in high school with literal children. That’s pretty iffy.”
“Am I going to regret asking what a himbo is?”
“Wholesome, muscly, dumb.”
Billy nods as if he understands. “I don’t understand women.”
“Maybe you would if you spent more time actually talking to them instead of, well, you know.”
“I talk to them plenty,” Billy scoffs.
“Okay.”
“I do!”
“I didn’t disagree with you, Bill.”
“I’ll spend hours talkin’ with women! They're still a mystery!”
“Are those hours mainly flirting?”
Billy huffs. “I talk with you all the time.”
“Yeah and you understand me.”
“No, I know you. Understandin’ is a whole ‘nother thing, darlin’.”
You chuckle a bit at that and swipe a handful of popcorn from the bowl.
“They let her go into the bathroom alone? Without checking it? Or looking for other exits? Rookie mistakes.” He shakes his head in mock seriousness. “And isn’t Alice supposed to see the future? How come she didn’t see this coming?”
“I dunno. She can’t know everything all the time.” You’re amused at how invested Billy is, even if it is under the guise of criticism. His comments continue through to the end of the movie.
“Well, what did you think?” You ask, finishing up some of the popcorn.
“There is nothing I can say that won’t get me in trouble.”
“Coward.”
“Take that back!”
“Nope.”
“Fine, it was awful but the music was alright.” He shrugs.
“Hah! I knew you would like it.”
“I never said that!”
“You paid attention the whole time! You didn’t even check your phone!”
“That’s cuz it’s us time, not cuz of the movie,” he explains.
“Sap,” you say, throwing a piece of popcorn at his face. Of course he effortlessly catches it in his mouth and grins at you as he chews.
“Are you gonna make me sit through the rest of them over the next few months?”
“Most likey.”
Billy groans at your words, tossing his head back against the couch.
“They get better. Sort of,” you offer, poking his side to get his attention.
“It’s not hard to do better than that,” he says gesturing at the TV.
“You had fun, admit it.” You poke him in the side again. “The movie entertained you even if you hated it.” You go to poke him again and he grabs your wrist, pulling you toward him until you fall on his chest. His free hand begins tickling your ribs and you squeal, wiggling to get away.
You try to retaliate with your own free hand, but he somehow scoops that one up as well, holding both your wrists in one hand and continuing to tickle you.
“I yield, I yield!” You shriek with laughter. He stops, resting his forehead against yours as you catch your breath.
“You started it,” he reminds as you pout at him.
“I was just poking you! You escalated!” You protest.
“What did you expect, sweetheart? ‘Course I did.”
You stick your tongue out at him and he releases your wrists with a chuckle. You lean back a little, but still stay firmly seated on his lap.
“It’s not too late yet, do you want to watch another one or call it a night?” You ask.
Billy sighs in defeat. “Might as well get the next one over with sooner rather than later.”
You grin widely and pull up ‘New Moon’. You rest your head against Billy’s chest and he fixes the blanket around the both of you before wrapping his arms around you.
“Just a heads up, I’ll probably cry at some point during this one,” you warn. Billy rubs gentle circles on your back with his hand. You can hear the smirk in his voice when he says,
“S’okay, baby. I promise I'll only tease you a little when you do.”
If you want on or off my taglists, feel free to let me know!
@kayhi808
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I was going through the lessons again and...
Spoilers for Lesson 14 undercut
How did this pass me? These lines give away so much but make so much sense. It feels like a cop-out. I hate it.
"MC, a certain bond exists between each of us and you."
Okay, great. So I am stuck with ya'll.
"I may not be able to see it, but I can feel it."
You go by your feelings a lot, just sayin'.
"It's unmistakable."
Everyone makes mistakes.
"It's what drew all us to you, and it's why we're all here together now. It was destiny in a way."
Call it what you will... fate... destiny... A bitch.
"Even if we were to rewind time and start over... we could meet a thousand different times in a thousand different ways and still end up here."
Enough with my stupid commentary, but Diavolo gives us a reason. A valid reason. A reason that is so easy... that it feels like a cop-out. There is no way it can be that simple. The thing is... it can be. There is a bond between MC and everyone. From the brothers to the dateables and our son, Luke. It is an undeniable bond that transcends time and space. The title line of the game is "My love for you transcends time." Now what am I blabbing about?
It is a reason that the brothers and others feel a connection. It is why we can bond with them easily. We have already done it. Time and time again. Time is a weird thing. Nightbringer has described it as "dark, heavy mud." Solomon gave an explanation Barbatos gave him a while back (which I can't find). There are points that are repeated over and over again, like the MC's room. That is THEIR room. Another big point is Mammon being first. It might be a running gag, but it is true. Mammon has always been first; the first pact, the first friend, the first guide, etc. Mammon is the first for nearly everything in the game for a reason. He is the first card we get from Nightmare in the OG game and NB game.
It doesn't matter what how many times they start over- it will end the same. It will end where they are all together.
But Time is just another factor in this game. This does bring up a thought for me. The brothers and others don't remember MC when they are brought back to the past. None of them remember MC and it makes sense for none of them to know them. If Barbatos is Nightbringer, it can be understood why he said "You don't trust me because I'm a demon." He doesn't know MC well enough. You can see the future, but not know someone. He also mentioned in the OG game that he never did anything with his powers because Diavolo forbid him from doing so. He got bored too, I believe and ya know, his "mistake". If Barbatos is Nightbringer, it would make sense why he say somethings that make no sense. Like everyone else, he does not know MC at all, but will. Because there is a bond between him and MC. Time and time again, they all end up together.
This is literally just me rambling.
#i have so many drafts#ren is rambling again#i am never going to stop#there is no end#obey me nightbringer theory#obey me spoilers#obey me nightbringer spoilers#ren shut up#obey me#obey me nightbringer
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Favourite lyrics from ‘Louis Tomlinson’ Songs:
Disclaimer: I love all of Louis’ songs and think he is an incredibly talented lyricist. His lyrics often make me feel emotions I wasn’t expecting, and get me into deep spirals of thought.
Faith In The Future
All This Time: It’s not how you spend the time, it’s if you waste it // And I keep on building mountains hoping that they’ll turn to gold but the truth is I still doubt that what I do can get me home // Our eyes meet and I can tell that you’re the same as me
Saturdays: I’m gazing at the floor somebody’s got your trainers on the ones the ones that you wore when you walked out the door // We always used to say Saturdays take the pain away // Through my cigarette A shadow of you sticks me to the carpet // My heart might be broken but I won’t be broken down
Holding Onto Heartache: Creates the strangest feelin’ just slowly waitin’ for the end // The moments never shown to us because we faded into darkness // You know the parties over when you’re standing in an empty space alone // Nothing’s ever easy to be honest, I’m not easy on myself
Face The Music: Love and hate are in-between depends on your reality to see them // So one more night I’m gonna choose I don’t wanna face the music but I still wanna dance with you // Close your eyes and count to ten If you’re standin’ on the edge of fallin’ // Let’s buy some time
The Greatest: Said I had a plan for us time, it came and changed it all we had to disappear // Back dancin’ in the dark back to the very start finding pieces we can fit making up for what we missed // It’s you and me until the end life for us is never over
That’s The Way Love Goes: Remember when you told me I should give it time? well, here’s the chance for you to take your own advice // When it cuts you, when you bleed that’s when you’re feelin’ it the most // Not gonna ask you, but we’ll make sure your okay who cares? It’s her loss anyway
Chicago: They say, “bitter ends turn sweet in time” is that true of yours and mine? // Has it been long enough that you can forgive me? Just because it didn’t work, doesn’t mean it’s meaningless to me // ‘Cause I’ve been wondering what you’d say would you have told me to keep goin’? or would you say to walk away?
Headline: Sometimes, I wake up, and I hear you through the silence // You let your pride hide all your beauty and your kindness // So many reasons now you’re not mine // You never told me never I guess I never knew we’d have the shortest forever // Thought I could, but I can’t forget you
Silver Tongues: You said love was a pretty lie // you smile at me and say, “It’s time to to go” but I don’t feel like goin’ home // you say grass was a dirty drug you like to preach with a vodka in your mug // you and me until the end wakin’ up to start again
Angels Fly: There’s a time for sayin’ who did what where it went wrong, I wanna hear all that, but right now what I need you to know is // You’ll be okay, we can talk tomorrow I’m on my way with some time to burrow // I won’t say a word, it can wait ‘til morning // put the pain behind you now you don’t need it anymore // there were problems in this empty bottle at the bottom, but we drained all that (My ultimate favourite of FITF)
She Is Beauty We Are World Class: Conversation is currency shapes become language // Escape the inevitable fade into light soak up the empathy // Has it been all this before? Do you see what I see?
Bigger Than Me: When somebody told me I would change I used to hide behind a smile // I didn’t read the signs walking different lines I know I took a left trying to make it right // I was afraid, I don’t know why ‘cause so does the world outside I’ve realised and it’s bigger than me
Common People: I Came from a good home A house full of terrace dreams that was enough for me // The mistakes and the heartaches when I get lost, I go back to where I started // I took head of the local no deep pockets, only big hearts do you see what I see?
Out Of My System: I never wanna go slowly I only wanna go faster towards disaster // I am only half of what I think I can be // I’ve lived a lot of my life already but I gotta get though the rest // I’m taking all of my demons puttin’ them where I won’t see them ‘cause I just wanna feel alive
Written All Over Your Face: A hurricane behind the door so, I’ve come ready for a war // When we’ve finished saying nothing can we, please, get back to loving?
Lucky Again: I see how hard you’ve worked to be yourself // But I figured it out, then made my way back to a life I would choose // Before the world, it got so serious before the time, it got away from us // Whatever get you through the darkest night just find the light out in the darkness, hold tight // I’m a hard man to find but you figured it out and I love you for that
Walls
Defenceless: “wish I didn’t need so much of you” I hate to say but I do // we’re sleeping on our problems like we’ll solve them in our dreams // And I can’t get inside when you’re lost in your pride but you don’t have a thing to prove // And I’m too tired to be tough just wanna be loved by you
Only The Brave: Set fire to history I’m breaking my own rules // I’ve been close enough to touch but I never cared for love // And it’s only hello, hello, no goodbye. (One of my favourites from Walls)
Walls: The day you walked away and took the higher ground was the day I became the man that I am now // Nothing makes you hurt like hurtin’ who you love // For every question why, you were my because // So this one is a thank you for what you did to me why is it that thank-yous are so often bittersweet?
Always You: I went to Tokyo to let it go drink after drink but I still felt alone // Walked through the door but it felt nothing like home ‘cause you’re not home //
Too Young: I’ve been looking back a lot lately me and you is all I’ve ever known It’s hard to think you could ever hate me // Now we can finally have conversation that I wish we could’ve had before // Now I realise yeah, I realise we were too young to know we had everythin’ // It’a been two years since I’ve seen your face I’m trying to find some better words to say before I let this moment slip away
Two Of Us: This morning I woke up still dreaming with memories playing through my head // Even when I’m on my own I know I won’t be alone // I can feel your blood run through me you’re written in my DNA looking back in every mirror // We’ll end just like we started just you and me and no one else
Perfect Now: You don’t feel pretty and It’s hard to miss I wish you could see my point of view as someone starin’ back at you // Just keep your head up, love, keep your head up don’t hide away don’t ever change // I guess some queens don’t need a crown and I know why // You never do but if you asked me too I’ll tell the truth lying next to you // You make me feel like being someone good to you, even at your worst. (My ultimate favourite from Walls)
Fearless: Tell me, do you still remember feeling young? And strong enough to get it wrong // Now if happiness is always measured by the life you designed that car on the drive then you should feel better than ever but you know as well as I it’s all lies
Kill My Mind: And you hate me, and I want more // And ya won’t let go of you hold on me // Kept me living from the last time from a prison of a past life
Don’t Let It Break Your Heart: Life get hard and it gets messed up when you give so much, but it’s not enough // And what hurts you is gonna pass and you’ll have learnt from it when it comes back
We Made It: Now, we’re saying goodbye, waving to the hard times yeah, it’s gonna be alright, like the first time // Share a single bed and tell each other what we dream about things we’d never say to someone else out loud // Oh god, what I could’ve become don’t know why they put this all on us when we’re so young
Habit: I always said that I’d mess up eventually I told you that, so what did you expect from me? // I took some ‘cause I ran out of energy of playing someone I heard I’m supposed to be // You gave me the time and the space I was out of control and I’m sorry, I let you down
Others
Just Hold On: Feels like you’re standing on the edge looking at the stars and wishing you were them // Where do you go when the story’s done? you can be who you were or who you’ll become // The sun goes down and it comes back up the world it turns, no matter what // It’s not over ‘til it’s all been said It’s not over ‘till your dying breath
Just Like You: But you only get half of the story the cash, and the cars and the glory // ‘Cause nobody cares when you’re boring // yeah, I feel the same as you do same stress, same shit to go through // I’m just like you if you only knew // Yeah, I get sad too and when I’m down I need somebody to talk to // Every heart breaks the same every tear leaves a stain can’t I just be same?
Back To You: These days I don’t even know myself // I tell myself I’m done with wicked games but then I get so numb with all the laughter that I forget about the pain
Miss You: Just one more pint of five does it even matter anyway? // Just like that and I’m sober I’m asking myself, “is it over?” // And all of these thoughts and the feelings cheers to that if you don’t need them // We can’t even be on the phone now and I can’t even be with you alone now // we were in love and now we’re strangers // When I feel it coming up, I just throw it all away get another two shots ‘cause it doesn’t matter anyway
Copy Of A Copy Of A Copy: It’s an old curse dreamers diving head first // Nothing is original there’s nothing left to say // I can hear you howling until your lungs hurt so let this be your comfort // In a strange way all in this together been this way forever
#louis tomlinson#Louis Tomlinson songs#Louis Tomlinson lyrics#Louis Tomlinson favourite lyrics#lyric speak#music speak#faith in the future#faith in the future louis tomlinson#Walls#Walls Louis Tomlinson#lyrics#Faith in the future lyrics#walls lyrics
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Social Media I (WTMFS)
A/N: Hi everyone, with university I've been a bit busy (again) and I've hardly been able to come back to tumblr. The thing is, today while I was studying I came up with this idea and I needed to post it. These posts will be linked to the chapters of When The Music Finally Starts, so they will go chronologically. In the future they might even serve to help me progress the story faster since there are chapters that I find difficult to write and it might be easier using this way.
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PAIRING: Harry Styles x Hailey Foster (1Dmember!reader)
WARNING: Like i said, other times, I'm not an english native speaker, maybe there are some mistakes. Also, a little look into the next chapter of the story :)
TIMELINE OF THE POSTS: DECEMBER 2016-APRIL 2017
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DECEMBER 12, 2016:
According to sources inside the show, Niall Horan, Hailey Foster, Liam Payne and Harry Styles turned up to support Tomlinson in his X-Factor performance. The 25-year-old singer was performing for the first time since the death of his mother, Johannah Deakin, on 7 December.
Although this shows the great friendship and closeness that still exists between the band members, Zayn Malik was the only one of the former bandmates who didn't show up to express his support for Louis.
It should be remembered that rumour has it that Malik, who announced his departure from the band a month and a half into their third world tour in March 2015, ended on bad terms with Louis and the band's only female member, Hailey, in particular. Although the reasons for the dispute never transcended, it is possible that they are still present as the singer did not show up to support one of his former "friends" in such a hard moment.
THE SUN © 2016
FEBRUARY 14, 2017:
5.4k likes
1dloveupdates: JACK WALKER AND HAILEY FOSTER ON THEIR VALENTINE'S DATE AT THE RITZ IN LONDON!!!!
27 comments
my1dheart: sorry, but they are a stunt since 4ever
harley'sdaughter: the worst i've seen, dude
haileywithlove: I've seen photos of her outfit, she was ✨GORGEOUS✨
futuremrsstyles: where's harry?
amelia_west: he isn't his boyfriend or anything, GROW UP!
futuremrsstyles: OMG, why u're so rude?
1dloveupdates: @amelia_west @futuremrstyles please, no fights on my account
FEBRUARY, 2017:
10.7k likes
hsdailyofficial: Harry recently in Jamaica!!!
109 comments
HSwifey: he's literally a model
ismael's_sis: hopin' he's working on an album
larrylover: people are saying Louis's also there!!🔥
MARCH 4, 2017:
8.3k likes
hfdaily: Hailey arriving to Milán airport few days ago!!
64 comments
1Dstarforever: she's comming home, she's comming homee
hailey_fosterfan2307: she's a fashion icon even when she takes a plane lmao
MARCH 9, 2017:
MARCH 31, 2017:
1,2M likes
harrystyles: SIGN.OF.THE.TIMES // 7.APRIL.17 //
101k comments
ismael's_sis: F*CKING FINALLY!!! OMG!!
APRIL 21, 2017:
31.6k likes
thegrahamnortonshowofficial: Mr Harry Styles on the show, ladies and gentleman
132 comments
lisawatts: Sign Of The Times was so emotional
freddythescottish: he's a funny guy, he was great on the show
seb_thestark: this dude should've gone solo before
APRIL 22, 2017
12,6k likes
haileyfqueen: Hailey with Jack leaving The London Studios yesterday (21/04/2017)
90 comments
harleyisreal2012: I'm just sayin that Harry was also there yesterday 🫣
slayhailey: she went with him, he's going to appear on Good Morning Britain next Monday
h_defender: he doesn't give me good vibes, too arrogant 😐
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Thanks for reading/watching and I hope you liked it, please leave any comments or leave a like it if you enjoyed it.
See you soon :)
#harry#harry styles one shot#harry styles fanfic#harry styles#harry styles soft fanfic#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles x famous!reader#music#one direction#styles
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SHINSEKAI - Empire of Fantasy: Chapter 1
Location: ES Idol Exclusive Inn Characters: Mika
< The next morning in the Tohoku region. ES idol exclusive traditional inn, “Valkyrie’s” room. >
Mika: Nghaaaaahh…♪
(Ahh~ It’s been a while since I last slept this well.)
(I’ve had to make preparations for “SS” and make the outfits, so I’ve been pullin’ all-nighters the past few nights to work on them.)
(My head’s been foggy ‘cause of my lack of sleep and I can’t get my brain to think about the difficult stuff, so that’s not good.)
(That’s normal for “Valkyrie”... As long as I listen to what Oshi-san tells me to do, then our performance should go without a hitch.)
Woah!? Did I just say that out loud?
I didn’t, right? Thank goodness, that was close ♪
(Ahaha. The “order” I was given felt like it was implyin’ I shouldn’t call Oshi-san “Oshi-san” for the duration of the Qualifying Rounds.)
(I don’t get what that “order” means, though. It’s already a habit and I end up doin’ it like I’m breathin’, so it’s hard not to…)
(It slipped out several times yesterday and Oshi-san got angry at me.)
(Wait, I should be careful not to call him “Oshi-san” in my head too.)
(We’ve been sent out to the Tohoku region for the Qualifyin’ Rounds.)
(Since we dominated the “Championship Match” yesterday, it meant that “Valkyrie” won the Qualifyin’ Round.)
(Only one unit can win the Qualifyin’ Round in the Tohoku region, so that means Tsumu-chan-senpai and his unit, “Switch”, didn’t make it and that’s a bit sad, though.)
(They approached us and said they didn’t want to spend an entire month on the Qualifyin’ Round, so we should quickly decide the winner and then do whatever we want afterwards.)
(It might not be right of me to say they reap what they sow, but they should be fine with how things turned out too. That goes the same for the other idols who took part in the “Championship Match”.)
(But the “Championship Match” is somethin’ we did on our own that the administration committee basically ignored.)
(There’s a rule where the other units have to pay the winner all their current and future “SSL$” if they win.)
(The idols in the Tohoku region discussed things together and just made that sort of contract between themselves.)
(Of course, if you gain that large amount of “SSL$”, you’ve basically won already, but it’s still unofficial…)
(In reality, it doesn’t guarantee that we’ve actually won the Qualifyin’ Round.)
(That’s why we should be careful. The agenda for “SS” has been completely erased so we can’t let our guard down until they officially announce the winners.)
(The administration committee said they’d fine us if we disobey their “orders”, didn’t they?)
(No matter how much of a profit we made in the “Championship Match” yesterday…)
(If I keep sayin’ “Oshi-san this” and “Oshi-san that” and they fine us, everythin’ would have been for nothin’.)
(Ngh~... Having to think about all this kinda stuff is pretty troublesome. And I’m not good at stuff like that.)
(We don’t get to come to the Tohoku region all the time, so I would have liked to have fun sightseein’, though.)
(I make mistakes easily so it might be kinda scary… Maybe it’s a good idea for me to stay holed up in the inn until the “SS” Qualifyin’ Rounds are all finished.)
(It does feel like a waste and I think I might go crazy with nothin’ to do.)
(Oshi-san looked really happy yesterday. Oshi-san is the type of person to be driven by his regrets or anger, but that’s because he’s really competitive.)
(It’s only natural for him to win and I’m sure he really likes winnin’. I can’t ruin Oshi-san’s happiness and the good result because of me.)
(Which means I should come up with somethin’ new to call “Oshi-san” and make sure I don’t disobey the “order” ♪)
(What should I call him? Onii-chan? Master? S-Shuu-kun…?)
(Ahh, I think a month could easily go by with me just tryin’ to come up with new names to call him…♪)
………!?
(Ngh? Huh? What was that just now!?)
(Am I half-asleep…? I thought I just saw somethin’ weird.)
(What was it? Somethin’ like a fairy…?)
(Hmm, am I still dreamin’? There’s no way a small human the size of your palm could exist in real life.)
← Previous Chapter ᠂ ⚘ ˚⊹˚ ⚘ ᠂ Next Chapter →
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So we know math is a Buddie theme. "I aced my math test." "I thought about using my newfound math skills to do my taxes." But let's look at this a bit closer.
We have Madney (a couple and two characters who are have been paralleled to Buddie & Buck and Eddie) being audited. They have no idea why. They're nervous, Chim is spiraling, Maddie accepts the inevitable though she was worried at first. Chim keeps thinking about jail and other people who are purposely defrauding the IRS.
Maddie: "Tax fraud? No, no, no, we--"
Chim: "We're not criminals. I mean, look at us. We're not frauds, either, we're actually very genuine."
They bicker about who was supposed to file as Head of Household and what share of the expenses they pay. They both also claimed Jee as their dependent. "Oh, I didn't know you were going to claim Jee." "I don't think we really discussed it." (I think he says this, I can't quite make it out)
Chim: "I think that's just an honest mistake."
Auditor: "Hmm, two for two?"
Maddie: "Is there more?"
Auditor: "You tell me."
Then they 'fess up to everything, forcing the auditor to try to keep up and to assure them that they're okay with that stuff.
Chim: "Are we going to debter's prison?"
Auditor: "This isn't a Dickens novel." -> this isn't the past
Maddie: "That's what I said." -> she/Eddie already knew that
Auditor: "We just send people to regular prison now." -> this is the present (can be seen as referencing LGBTQIA+ or for Buck and Eddie's stories together and separately)
"You will also need to decide who is the Head of your household." -> "We could switch every year." "I love that idea. Let's alternate." "Love it." -> two firefighters who most likely make the same amount of income per year where there's a child in the mix (and possibly more), just sayin'
The very next scene, we get the Buck and Natalia date where Natalia is wearing red.
All of this leads to: Since math is a Buddie theme and Madney are being audited (and Buck's date is the next scene), the writers are telling us to absolutely sit up and pay attention. They are the auditors per se. They are putting Buddie under the microscope, together and separately.
And once again we see how far along Eddie (Maddie/Christopher) really is in comparison to Buck (Chim) when it comes to the future.
#911 6x15#911 6x15 lb#911 lb#911#911posts#buddie#buck x eddie#evan x eddie#buddieposts#madney and buddie parallels#buddie parallels#911 parallels
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Howdy y'all, it's good to take a breather, huh? Well that's what we've been doin' since our visits with the @pactargent and @perate-ind folk. With some good ol' trade and aid under our belts, we finally managed to fix up the Arc Ships.
Speakin' of the Arc Ships, today I'm joined by Huxun, the vexillologist responsible for the design of the Flotilla's flag. Mind sharin' what that's about?
H: Thank you, Captain-Mayor Voxong, it's an honour to be here. I'll just attach the file for the viewers...
V: Very nice.
H: I'm glad you think so, Captain-Mayor.
V: Oh, no need for all that darlin', just call me Voxong. So, wanna let everyone know what the deal is?
H: Oh... um, yes, Voxong. The design reflects our new life amongst the stars, with the partcial circle on the top right representing a sun, and the two circles in the bottom left representing a barren world and its moon. Neither are the destination of the Arc Ship in the middle, as it passes through the system, leaving a trail behind. And for simplicitiy's sake, instead of making three Arc Ships for the design, there is just one which also symbolises unity, with three Zies standing in for the totality of the Arc Ships. The text is translate into "Flotilla". I aimed to make it all feel as though we're just passing through, on our way to greater things.
V: Don't get me wrong, darlin', but it does kinda look like a plug flyin' through space, lookin' for its socket. Not sayin' it ain't pretty, but yeah. Anyway, that's the minute of broadcast time ya paid for... But see me after the broadcast for some wine and stuff. Yea? Yea. Good
Anyway, on to the topic. Arc Ships. Ya see, we were kinda in a rush when we shot outta @republicmiora occupied space, so a few important things were forgot and behind, and a few more things we couldn't even get our hands on 'cause of the time crunch... But thanks to the Perate and Argent folks, we've got the three Arc Ships workin' properly. Or workin' well enough to actually be able to turn a profit.
Most important is Arc Ship Tangitus, the Arc ship of my family, the Chenucchi family. It's been retrofitted to become a mobile shipyard, poppin' out new baby ships is her job. A necessity if we're gonna be minin' and producin' on the go, especially if we lose ships 'cause a pirates and such. If ya know some basics about ships and engineerin' then this is the Arc ship for ya. It's gonna be some time before Tangitus can make some real beauties but for now, it can make Fleagrub and Beetlegrub class vessels, for transport and minin'.
Next up is the Arc Ship Shuarta, the Arc ship of the Xiementi family. It's been specialised for research, hydroponics, growth labs, that kinda stuff. How else we gonna stay on top of the cuttin' edge of technology? And of course we gonna keep the workers fed with nutrient goo, after all. Anyhoo, its crew is pretty selective about who works there, only the brightest and most obedient workers are invited to its decks. Wait what the brell is that tentacled thing? [PEW PEW] Ugh... I guess some lab mistakes are gonna happen... Ignore that!
Finally, Arc Ship Olezalit, the Arc ship of the Qinelli Family. Most of the minin' ships made on Tangitus get allocated there. They've got refineries and manufactories, but if that work's too hard, ya can always grab one of their suits and jump out at the nearest asteroid to earn a few zies. That's where mosta the roughnecks work outta, and honestly if ya got half a brain, they don't really give a dinzo. If ya can do manual labour and not get yerself killed, yer likely to get a berth on board.
Now, that ain't all the ships we got, but the Arc ships are pretty much where all the large-scale production goes down. We got plans to make more Arc ships in the future, but that ain't for a long while, got bigger priorities until then.
Yer probably wonderin' where we'll be takin' these beauties next. Well, that's a secret. We got some buyers lined up and they ain't exactly interested in havin' those details shared. We'll update y'all after, and hope to see ya soon. Voxong out.
Now, where's that pretty flag maker?
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So! A lot of stuff happened yesterday regarding Deviantart and a lot of information that was being spread was inaccurate and fear-mongering, and while i do not think the site is wholly perfect nor that they didn’t make mistakes i do want to try and put a post out there talking about what was present there and where people were mistaken! The journal has now been changed as has Deviantarts NOAI system (for the better i must add!!) but lets look at what was present for people to see when the discussion kicked off! I’m putting it below a cut because its long but please do read, i do want to try and combat misinformation and fearmongering, and do my best to reassure people while also pointing out what ARE missteps and mistakes on Deviantarts part!
First of all let me be clear, do not agree with AI art, do not think DA should have their own AI, do not think they should allow AI submissions at all. But. Lets get on to what was written on this journal BEFORE they updated it to what it is now:
IMPORTANT:
DeviantArt did not, does not, and will not use deviations submitted to DeviantArt to add to third-party AI models or training sets, or on DreamUp itself.
DeviantArt did not consent to third-party technology usage of images on our site, which were used to train AI models. In an effort to combat future unauthorized usage, we have enacted “noai” — an industry-first directive alerting AI models of deviants' desires to opt out.
DeviantArt is the only platform giving creators the ability to tell third-party AI datasets and models whether or not their content can be used for training. This is a protection for creators to help them safeguard their content across the web.
We encourage other platforms who enable creators to publish their work to implement similar protections. We are making our “noai” directive available for use by all.
You will notice in this section the first two bulletpoints. Bulletpoint one explicitly states they are not using your art to upload and add to third party AI, AI training, or even their own AI. This is stated several times throughout this post! The opting out of ai usage does not mean if you do not have that checkmarked ticked they use your art for this, no, it is in fact about checking on a code that prevents what is ALREADY HAPPENING AND HAS BEEN SINCE THE INFANCY OF AI ART THEFT. Which is that sites trawl deviantart for art to use and usernames to acquire for prompts people can shove into their horrid ai programs. Deviantart has nothing to do with this, and states here they do not have any desire to submit your deviations to this. Right now, before this update, your art already was subject to AI and they were not doing that and had no control over it! Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but most the fear-mongering is about something that. Is already happening. Not having the checkmark that says 'i do not wish to have my art used for ai' does not make it any worse, thats just status quo, same as it ever was. So no. Not checking that on does not mean you are now allowing your art to be taken by AI and that it wasn't being before. It means things stay as they are. Which again, your art was already subject to AI, this was not going to make it any worse.
Bullet point two! Deviantart clarifies that, since they do know and are aware of how many highly popular artists currently on the site have been targeted by ai in the past, they have had no sayin this! Which is why they have come out with this update, to try and combat this! This update was not about allowing AI to access your art, it was the complete opposite.
There are several points within this journal that clarify this over again, when they talk about that checkbox stopping ai from using your art they are NOT saying it aill be used if you dont, only that it is the status quo of them having no control over this and that they are not selling nor giving out your art to AI because they do not consent to that and neither do you. There was never a plan listed here to allow that to happen. The username opt out is also aiming at software that is ALREADY AND HAS BEEN FOR AGES using peoples Deviantart usernames to generate art in their style! Not opting out does not mean deviantart automatically goes 'oh yes you can use this person now here you go art theft machines!' It means the code they have made and invented now isnt applied to your account, so you have the same level of protection that you have had for years before this journal! Which is that, yes, AI of any kind could and had for many high profile artists scalped their work and style! Which, yes, sucks so very much!! But i do not think representing this as not opting out makes this any worse is accurate, it will just stay the same; bad. This doesn’t mean not having it be opt out as default was a great move, of course, i’m not saying that.
Now. Do i think everything they did was good? No. They should not be involved in making an AI system, even one that is more ethical as they seem to be trying to make theirs; Not rolling out their AI defence system as automatically you are given their new defence toggled on as default was also a misstep, but people i believe were fear-mongering far more than was helpful for artists trying to understand what was happening to a platform they use; same as the need for a mass toggle opt-out for pre existing deviations. Not because without that defence on and that toggled not off your art would be more susceptible to AI than it had been before! Again, cannot stress enough that was clearly never stated and that they state the opposite! It is still bad that the username out was not set automatically, it should've been opted out by default, again i am not defending that i think it was a misstep that undercuts the vastly positive changes they were bringing about, as was dipping their toes into AI in the first place. But, within hours they changed that. It is now opt out by default, and there is a mass system for previous deviations, they have listened and updated their system! This is good, this is a good thing, these protections they are implementing are good; while im sure third party software may still wriggle around, there's truly not much we or deviantart can do if that happens; this is a step forward for the site! This is good progress! They are still making a mistake allowing AI art on the site at all and having their own AI system, but truly a lot of what was mentioned in this journal was not what people were saying it was at all, there was an intense level of misinformation being spread that clearly went against several important bulletpoints mentioned several times in this journal. I am of the belief they should drop their AI software entirely, and that AI art should be not permitted on site, but i do commend them for actually attempting to give artists more power over an already prevalent issue. I'm not dick sucking here, i fully believe in holding the site accountable for their mistakes, but i do not think fear-mongering and misrepresenting information is helpful for anybody, hence why i am rambling in this post.
So TLDR: Your deviations were already subject to the things people were fearmongering about before the opt in/out system. Yes deviantart has made mistakes in getting involved in ai art and i am not defending their creation and allowing use of their own system. Yes they made a mistake not flagging everything as opt out as default but that has been rectified. No they were never planning to scalp all your previous deviations and give them to ai, that was already happening without their control or say, you had been opted in for years with deviantart having no say nor power over that, because AI art is art theft on a massive scale. Do i want to go on the line in saying Deviantart will never change their stance and might fuck this up worse and undo all the extremely good things they have implemented? No, i don’t work there and i’m not affiliated with them. My goal here is, to the best of my abilities (not claiming to be an expert i have just read through the post several times), purely to point out things that were misrepresentated in the immediate reaction to this update, so that people can make a better informed decision on their feelings and support of the site. This was a flawed introduction of a very good and helpful system, and it’s a shame that A) deviantart also tarred it with making their own AI, and that B) people misrepresented the facts of what was announced, because this NOAI is a really good thing that is being implemented. That is all.
(Also don’t come here to argue with me about wether AI art is good or bad, you are not going to sway me into being positive about it; i have very strong beliefs about it and i am not here to argue nor debate.)
#long post#Deviantart#Ik this isnt normally do on this site but i just did want to help here a little!#if this makes me catch heat so be it im genuinely#just trying to clear up some stuff that i think was causing a lot of distress and upset for artists#i also dont know what tags to use im just sticking it w a deviantart tag and??? Thats all i know to do
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𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐤 𝐭𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐦𝐞. ᥫ᭡ 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐨
𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬. you and matt had recently separated and it’s been a couple weeks. you decided to keep off social media for a while but this one particular day you didn’t. part two <-
𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭. I AM CRAVING A MATT STURNIOLO X READER INSPIRED BY THE SONG DRUNK TEXT ME BY LEXI JAYDE. - hearteyes4chris <-
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬. lots of angst!!!
𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬. i really hope this met your expectations and im sorry if it’s short! i went straight based off the song so hopefully you see the relations between! lmk if u want a matt x reader make up like a part 2 where they get back tg idk but enjoy!!
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭. 700+
it’s been almost a month since you and matt both decided you needed to separate. you hated using the words break up because it would make it real; although it felt real now.
things didn’t end on the best of terms and because that you decided you wanted to stay off social media. you knew people would begin to speculate and try to predict what happened and knowing you, you wouldn’t be able to stop reading comments once you started.
you woke up one day feeling better than usual. you had a spurt of energy so you decided you should get out of the house for real and not just to get food.
you decided to go to the gym and get brunch by yourself. you then went on a walk, something you had never done before.
unfortunately the walk wasn’t as pleasant as brunch. everything reminded you of matt. the way you’d hear someone laugh and think if you were ever going to hear his laugh again. how there are some things he’d point out and you’d both have a good laugh at them.
those thoughts brought your mood down so you decided it was time to go home.
you got home and took a long hot everything shower trying to get yourself together.
once you got out, you continue your normal routine until finally you felt nice and clean and settled in your bed.
you put a movie on trying to distract yourself for the rest of the day.
evening came along and you were officially bored of the tv.
you stared at your phone contemplating your future actions. you felt it was time to log back onto social media. you had to mentally prepare yourself for the backlash, the comments, the pictures and photos. anything that could potentially trigger you.
you took a deep breath before logging back into instagram, twitter, and tiktok.
you opened instagram and the first thing you saw was a video of a party. you continued watching until the video showed a guy and a girl full on making out in front of the camera for a few seconds. then, the video ended and started over.
you gulped, looking closer and seeing the familiar locks of hair and earring. all of a sudden you felt sick to your stomach.
while you were here, trying to heal…matt was…
you looked at the caption.
sturnioloteam | 📸 matt with a girl at a local club in LA!
via @/anonymous on instagram
you clicked on the comments. terrible mistake.
view all 178 comments
@/sturnbabyyy: that does not look like y/n
reply to @/sturnbabyyy from @/stunagirl91: what im sayin 👀
@/mattloverzzz: THAT SHOULD BE ME!! but get it i guess y/n.
reply to @/mattloverzzz from @/colbyjackcnm: I don’t think that’s y/n 😭
@/youdontknowme: this is crazy…
you stopped reading. your eyes started to sting as you scrolled further into your feed seeing more and more photos and videos.
after your separation breakup, matt was hooking up instead of healing…
you thought hard about how what he did. no matter how much he hurt you, you would never had done something like this to him.
you hated how much you were in love with him and because of that his actions pierced right through your heart.
the fact that when he got drunk his initiative wasn’t to drunk call or text you and spill his feelings out. his initiative was to hook up with a random girl. seeing those videos and photos was like getting hit in the stomach and getting the wind knocked out of you.
you couldn’t help but wish that he was thinking of you while he was with her. you wanted him to crawl back to you and tell you that she was nothing. that every second he was with her was a second he wishes he was with you. that no matter if she brought a smile to his face, the smiles you brought to him were bigger. that he can’t live without you. that he’s still in love with you. that he needs you.
that’s what you wished for.
instead, you were granted with more pictures and videos, this time tweets as you scoured the internet on twitter x.
tears were cascading down your face, blurring your vision. you stared at the pictures. your heart aching. you told yourself you’d never put yourself in this position but here you were.
fully and uncontrollably sobbing.
you hated that after all he’s done, after the hurt he’s caused; that you still want him. that if he called you right now you’d take him back…
instantly.
© slxtarchive
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