#JESUS CHRIST. NEVER EVER SAY HE ABANDONED HIS FAMILY. LEARN TO READ | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

missyasf · 4 years ago

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Game Of Hearts

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↳ Summary: Your life is in monotonous tones of grey, day in, day out. Nothing matters besides your sister, the only thing you remember is seeing fireworks before waking up to Tokyo abandoned . Soon enough you are properly introduced to the deadly Borderlands where you must fight for your life in Games to survive. When things can’t possibly get worse soon division arises and rivalries are made. No matter what though, you are constantly plagued by a blonde who, no matter how hard you try, just can’t seem to go too far without.

↳ Pairing: Chishiya/Reader

↳ Genre: Angst, smut, thriller

Word Count: 11k

___| Next

Trigger Warning: ⚠️ much like the manga/Netflix adaptation this will be a dark fic which includes mentions of prostitution, attempted murder, child ab*se, sexual harassment, heavy grief and attempted suic*de among other things. Additional warnings will be added for chapters when triggers are brought up. Please read with caution if these are triggers for you or just skip all together!

Side mention: This could be considered a prequel to the current Alice In Borderland. I’m writing based off the Manga bc I was a glutton and couldn’t wait no spoilers will be present as of...

Escapism

noun

the tendency to seek distraction and relief from unpleasant realities, especially by seeking entertainment or engaging in fantasy ♡

You had known all about this during your short lifespan, as a child you’d often play pretend with your sister that you were movie stars living in a five star hotel rather than the shitty busted up apartment on the wrong side of town. Escapism came in, many forms. It was often a way for people to cope psychologically, simply because sometimes, facing the reality of your situation can be too much for one person to handle mentally.

Or at least, that was the topic of your lecture today in class. The human mind always fascinated you. Even at the young tender age when your mom died and you watched your once cozy little family fall apart piece by piece until nothing was left in its wake.

It was your fascination that drove you now for most things, why? Why, why, why? You always wondered what the motive was behind someone’s actions, not only thing but you wanted to understand them better, to try and sympathize. You were already fairly intuitive in nature. It wasn’t difficult to read people. In fact your line of work made it easy, you’d watch a man who would be excited to be with you reach for his left finger as if used to touching something. A wedding band perhaps?

The lowlife cheater was fairly common in a whore house after all. Or the man who had been pissy this morning behind you in line because you had decided to try something new on the menu and you weren’t fast enough, obviously because he was tardy and woke up late, his shirt unbeknownst to him was button the wrong way and his tie loose and even the way his hair fell were all signs of being late to work.

It was the little things you noticed in people’s facial expressions, the way they moved and spoke. You could read people like a book, and sure sometimes it was useful. But you often wished you weren’t so perceptive. It drove you mad knowing when a potential love interest was no longer interested through a simple text or a friend not wanting to talk by their tone. Sometimes you wished you could just blot it all out, still, you lived like this day in and day out, you were used to this kind of thing and honestly. Friends? Love? Your gaze dropped a little to your feet, the pumps you were wearing a jet black and the heel too high for any respectable woman to ever wear.

...It wasn’t like you ever had any of those in your life and you had struggled to come to terms with the fact that you could survive without that kind of support. Still...it made you envious, the couple happily holding hands on the sidewalk. The group of friends all laughing at a table while they studied. Oftentimes these feelings are muted, but when you’re faced with something you’ve always craved, those muted feelings suddenly become hyperactive in your mind.

It’s pathetic, honestly.

“How dare you! You disgusting slut!”

In this moment however, you were brought back to reality at just what was happening, you squeaked loudly as you dodged the shoe the woman had thrown at you. This was all a regular occurrence, you had a lot of regulars who weren’t the most amazing people but hey, money was money. But along with them they also left a trail which their wives and girlfriends always followed. And then they always blamed you instead of their partner for leaving them for a prostitute despite you never having agreed to anything such as that.

It really wasn’t your fault, you were just trying to make a living while juggling with keeping up your own education, paying your fathers debts, rent and still somehow getting food on the table. What part time college job could provide that?

Prostitution wasn’t a job you would’ve gone into willingly but given the past and your trauma that was already laced in it you had been learning that sometimes because of the trauma we experience, sometimes people go back to that same trauma and actively participate in it as a way of feeling like they’re in control.

That whatever happened before, would never happen again if you were in control. You weren’t sure if you qualified under this category, trauma came in many forms but the one most used as an example in your class was that a study showed that women who were assaulted often develop a kink for consensual non consent as a way of coping with what happened, except this time, it’s in a controlled environment where it can end the moment they want it too.

Again, you weren’t sure you fell into this category, but you often wondered if your line of work was intertwined with your earlier memories when you were younger, if anything it brought comfort to you. Much of it, blotted out now simply because your mind couldn’t take it. Trauma expressed through amnesia was also much more common than many thought, and it’s so small, so easy to miss. After all how can you be aware of something if you have no memory of it anymore?

“Security!” Your manager screeched, two of the bodyguards were already between you and the feral woman who was ready to gut you clean as she screamed hysterically, her husband...your regular....at her side trying to get her to calm down only for her to come to her senses and slap him clean across the face. You didn’t condone violence, but he did have it coming...

You weren’t about to justify cheaters, you couldn’t imagine the hurt someone had to feel that not only did their partner cheat on them, but it was with someone...like you...You had been trying not to put down your job occupation, sex workers were just as valid as anyone else...you knew you would’ve thought this way if it was anyone but you in this position.

You sighed as you ran your hands through your hair, watching the couple get dragged out of the tight space of the brothel, “Jesus christ....didn’t you say you stopped using perfume because of this?” Miki, your manager sighed as she crossed her arms. You didn’t want to say your manager was your friend but she was the closest you had as you’d often complain to her about most of your problems. Sex work often attracted broken people, it wasn’t something she wasn’t used to.

“Yeah, but apparently he never got around to washing his clothes…” You wiped your mouth on the back of your hand, “Lipstick stain,” You glanced down at the ruby pink color that stained your skin now, “Fuck...that did hurt.” You rubbed your sore cheek that was still throbbing from where she had first slapped it when she ripped the door open of the room where she got to see with her own eyes you riding her husband.

It had happened so many times now you weren’t even embarrassed about someone walking in let alone a partner. Miki gave you a lopsided smile as she patted your shoulder, “Guess that just pays for being one of the best here. Did you at least get paid.”

You nodded, “Yeah, I always make them pay in advanced but I was hoping to get a tip afterwards...He was a lawyer so you know he had good money.” You sighed, crossing your arms, you were well aware of his partner because a lot of the time he didn’t even come in for sex anymore. It was funny how humans work.

He often felt his wife was overbearing and you had suspected some sort of verbal abuse by the way he talked about her constant screaming. Truthfully, you don’t think he ever intended on cheating with her. He just wanted someone to talk to without being judged, you could relate with sympathy to that, but he unfortunately chose to walk into a brothel instead of a therapy clinic and this truly was the only inevitable outcome. Still, you hope if for anyone’s sake, he gets that divorce for himself.

“Hey I think I’m gonna call it a day. I need to get back to Nanami, she was wanting to talk to me about college applications.” You sighed as you rubbed your neck, ever since she had graduated high school she had been chomping at the bit to start applying for college, maybe to just get out of the house and into a dorm. You couldn’t blame her and if she did that it would lighten your load a little.

Guilt washed over you at the thought as Miki chuckled, “They grow up pretty fast huh? My brother was the same way, except the moment he found out I was a sex worker was the moment he called me a whore and we haven’t talked since. That was probably about five years ago,” She crossed her arms as she sighed, “Crazy how the things we do for the ones we love, never appreciate our effort...I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

“If I’m not bruising.” You offered a weak smile as you nodded at her before going back to your room to get changed. Truthfully, you much like anyone else, often wished you could go to a world where reality wasn’t a concept any longer. Where you could lay out in the sun for the whole day and just soak up it’s rays with no worries or trepidations.

But sooner then later everyone had to face their fears. Even you, you supposed. But no matter how hard you fought your demons, they always came back tenfold. Again, you supposed your story was no different from tens of thousands, and yet you all live on regardless. Maybe it’s you who should be the one seeking therapy. Pulling on your jeans and the cropped top over your head before pulling the jacket over your arms and grabbing your bag.

The walk home was as quiet as ever, your hood over your head and earbuds any unwanted attention, it wasn’t too late at night, only eleven PM and your work had just been getting started but that had ruined the night for you and besides, you had already failed a test today, you could use the sleep tonight.

Occasionally you’d hear the sirens of a cop car passing by or a bystander shout, nothing out of the ordinary in this neighborhood. Walking up to the apartment complex you pulled the key from your bag as you unlocked the door. Quietly stepping insides as you shut the door before locking it once more. Your nose wrinkled at the smell of stale air mixed with rotten...something…

If anything, you were always lacking in something, you had been so busy most of the day that you never had time to clean anything leaving the house in a horrible state. Not that you thought this was much of a house.

Walking down the narrow hallway you opened the rickety door with a missing lock as you gave a brief smile to the small clump of bedsheets. Your sister was curled up and on her phone, eyes darting to the door with a hint of fear before she jumped up, “Y/n! You’re home earlier from night shift already!?”

You offered a smile as you set down your bag and nodded, sitting down on the mattress that laid on the floor as you replied, “Yeah, a coworker needed the extra hours so I let them cover for me tonight. Besides, you wanted to talk about college applications?” Your sister was under the impression your late night job was bartending at some hole in the wall downtown, where in all actuality you just went there to drink a few days and talk to the loud and sometimes obnoxious, but good hearted bartender who loved talking about his nerdy underaged friends that couldn’t do anything beside stay and drink soda.

It wasn’t that you didn’t think your sister would accept you, if she knew what you were actually doing. Fear, most times came in many different forms and this was one of them. You simply didn’t want to be judged, even by her. So nobody in your life truly knew who you were, and therefore, how could you hold the expectation for people to accept you into society if you were already self sabotaging yourself?

All philosophy aside, you were simply a lost soul, looking for your way in the cruel reality called life.

“Yes!” Nanami was chipper as always as she squealed, clapping her hands, “I…! I was thinking about applying to the university you attend! Maybe I'll get a grant and move into the dorms there? I already applied for several jobs, I’m just waiting on a callback!”

You offered a small smile as you hugged your knees to your chest, “I think you’d like it there, there’s lots to do around campus. But what will you go in for? The only advice I can offer is be sure it’s what you want to do.”

Nanami’s face faltered a little as she hummed, “Well...I thought maybe working with animals? I’d love to be an assistant surgeon in veterinarian? I know it’s a pretty...sad job but...I really like the idea of being able to heal such innocent things.” Your smile tugged into a gentle one at your sister. She was too tender for this world.

It had been your goal sense the day your mother died that you took care of your sister, it didn’t matter what happened to you. You could rot for all you cared at the end of the day, all you wanted was to look up and see your sister's smile and her happiness in life blossom. She more than anyone deserved it.

“I think you’ll be great at it.” You encouraged as you rested your chin on your hand, always happy to see her bounce in excitement as you yawned, your body was used to your demanding schedule but it was always more than happy to welcome a few extra hours of sleep.”

Hearing the door loudly slam close caused you both to jump, Nanami hurriedly crawled back in bed, pretending to be asleep as you frowned. Your dad must’ve come back home from wherever he was.

“Y/n! Just stay here! Can’t you talk to him later?” Nanami looked scared, she always did when he was around. But you weren’t about to stand down to the bastard any day of the week, you offered a weak smile as you replied.

“It’s fine Nami, I’ll be just a few minutes.” You replied, you knew that she knew, that was probably a lie. But you’d try your best, for her sake at least. But somebody had to put this guy in his place occasionally and it was always you. It results in a lot of screaming sometimes, other times he’d break down in tears or on a bad occasion you’d get shoved to the ground, a few times hit. Nothing major.

Walking out of the room you leaned against the wall of the entrance of the hallway watching your father stumble around in the living room, “Did you finally talk to the loan company?” You called out as you asked, not in a forgiving mood tonight. He had said he’d do this for two weeks in a row. The company that sank your whole family into the ground. The reason your mother couldn’t take it anymore and put a blade to her wrist.

Your father stood up, looking a little wobbly, obviously drunk, “Now listen here little girl I don’t have shit to own to you or anyone else.” You sighed as you tucked your tongue into your cheek, annoyance flowing inside you as you straightened up. You weren’t going to be bullied into being scared of this guy.

“Actually you do,” Your smile twisted into something more sharp, more bitter and sinister as you walked forward, “See, if you hadn’t of gotten involved in something shady like loan sharks we wouldn’t be drowning in debt and mom wouldn’t have killed herself because of you and both your daughters wouldn’t hate you. I know you drink away all our money in some pathetic attempt to escape from the cold reality that you fucked up your whole life and watched your family slip from your fingers while not even trying to do anything other then put us in further shit,” You closed your eyes as you tilted your head, “But the least you could do, is admit that. You owe us at least that for being a total fuck up.”

You opened your eyes to find pure rage brewing in your fathers eyes as you smiled once more, this time a false sense of sickly sweet tone to it as you shrugged, “Or you could live in denial, at this point, there really isn’t anything you can do to get anyone back ♡ ”

You had turned around, planning to tell Nanami that maybe she should go sleep over at a friends house today but you never got the chance, suddenly being slammed into the wall and flecks of spit hitting your face, “I am your fucking father! I deserve respect from you and your worthless sister! Do you know how much I provide for you both?”

Anger splintered through your veins as you grabbed onto his wrists, his fingers digging into your neck as you squirmed, “Like fucking what!? A shitty broken down apartment that your vacant from because you’re too fucking ashamed of yourself to even look at us sober!?”

Much like years in the past you weren’t surprised to hear Nanami cry as she rushed out of the room at the sound of you both screaming, “Stop!” She cried out, trying to break you both up, “Stop! Don’t fight! Why…! Why can’t we all just get along!” She sobbed only for your dad to shove her down making her curl up in defeat.

Alarm bells were triggered in your head at the sight of Nanami on the ground, she had never actually gotten hurt while in your sight and it was triggering something deep inside you as you watched him stalk up to her. Your hands shaking and rage boiling in your mind as you grabbed the closet thing you could find. An empty beer bottle on the table.

Your vision blurred and you don’t quite remember what happened other than glass shattering over his head and the brute force of you shoving something before blood was stained on your hands.

How did you end up sitting against the wall? Why was there….blood on your hands…? Your fingers trembled at the metallic sticky substance. All you could hear were Nanami’s sobs and cries as she frantically pushed herself away from the body slumped on the ground.

“You…! He…!” Nanami’s eyes brimmed with tears as you heard a loud boom making you jump, your eyes darting to the open window where….fireworks, big and bold crashed and crackled before you felt like you were sucked into a vortex making your whole vision black out.

Your head felt fuzzy and there was ringing in your ears as you groaned, curling up into yourself as the darkness beckoned you closer before you forcibly opened your eyes. You were laying against the hardwood floor. Beams of light streaked through the window and you could see dust particles in the air against the shower of sunshine that streamed in.

...Wait...Light? The thought had perplexed your head enough to make you push up from the ground, memories pulling into your mind as your breath became shallow, suddenly looking to the side where...you slumped against the wall. It must’ve just been a bad dream….your eyes flickered to Nanami’s curled up figure...a really vivid dream…? Something wrenched in your gut as you rubbed your eyes. What happened? “Nami…!” You whispered, forcing your muscles to move despite their protest as she whined.

After another moment she reluctantly opened her eyes, flickering around before she suddenly scrambled up, taking a deep breath as if realizing what had happened before, looking towards where your dad once was she frowned, “...I...What…” She seemed just as perplexed as you and if her face was anything to go by, last night had obviously happened, “Is dad…” She looked at the absent place of the floor.

Leaning against the wall your eyes darted around the room, “I guess so…” You silently felt relief at knowing your dad was still very much alive as you leaned back as you closed your eyes, trying to remember what had happened before everything went dark...oh..! The fireworks...had it been a celebration last night? Your brows pinched together, something felt...off...getting up you opened the door to the apartment walking out.

“Y/n? Y/n! Hey! Where are you going!” Nanami called out, quickly chasing after you as you frowned, cars were parked odd and there was no one out on the street...as in...at all...Something was very wrong and you couldn’t figure out what.

“Wow...it..must be a slow day…” Nanami felt a sense of discomfort at the lack of life as you both walked down the side walk, it didn’t just feel like a slow day it felt, apocalyptic. As if humanity just left on it’s own leaving nothing but an empty city behind. Cars were parked on the curb and a few even left in the street.

“No, it’s like everyone vanished...This is really weird.” You wrapped your arms around yourself as you frowned, looking around as you came closer to where typically it would be a booming part of the downtown but it was empty, just as everything before.

“Well, maybe it’s a national holiday?” Nanami rubbed her head, trying to make sense of the situation just as much as you, surely everyone wasn’t...gone...right? She looked around as she bit her lip, second guessing herself at all the cars that were vacant, “Hey Y/n.”

You paused as you looked at your sister, curving an eyebrow as she offered a weak smile, “What if everyone got raptured away like they talk about in christanity?” Your expression flattened as she giggled, obviously getting a rise out of you as you crossed your arms.

Raptured? Where? To heaven? “Wouldn’t it be fire and brimstone then if that was the case?” Nanami pouted at your words as you shrugged, snickering yourself at her expression, the tables now turned as you sighed, “I don’t think there’s anyone left in Tokyo...I mean, it feels like...we’d have seen someone by now...right?”

“Well…” Nanami frowned once more, a little disturbed at your words as she spoke, “There’s no way everyone could be gone I mean, where would they go? And how could we miss something like that...Maybe the police found us and now we’re under some weird simulation.”

Chills spilled down your spine as you shoved her making her whine, “Don’t say that! That makes me feel all weird…! I didn’t…!” You cut yourself off, you didn’t what? Murder your own dad in cold blood...you looked down at your hands, they were free of any blood but it still felt like something like sin lingered. Like no matter where you went, it would always be stuck to you.

You didn’t like this, not one bit. Briefly you felt the urge to go hunt down your dad, he was a deadbeat but you would never...you’d never kill him....Right?

“Well…” Nanami hummed her eyes scanning ahead before they jumped to the mall that was up ahead, “Hey…! If nobody is here...maybe we could make use of it! Come on! Let's go!” You yelped at her grabbing your arm before dragging you ahead. Cars were all parked and yet not a single person exited through the mall's entrance. Something just felt off! You wrapped your arms around yourself as you warily looked around the empty mall, “Nanami I really don’t like this!” You looked around, concern bubbling inside you as she ran ahead into the store, digging through the section of clothes as she giggled.

“Relax! I doubt any of this is real and even so…! Who’s going to stop us!?” She shrugged as she bounced in excitement, “Oh my god! I had dreamed of something like this happening! Now we can do whatever we want! Go wherever we want! Y/n!” She gasped with a smile, “Now we don’t even have to worry about money!”

“We don’t even know if this is permanent.” You looked around warily, not partaking as she began plucking off the racks, “Regardless of what this is, I don’t like it. I want to go back home, our home. This just doesn’t…” You shook your head, “This just doesn’t feel right.”

“Well you can feel that way!” Nanami clacked her tongue as she gave a childish smile, “But I’m gonna go through this whole store and get a new wardrobe so feel free to sit on the bench and tell me what you think looks good!”

Looking away you sighed, unable to pinch the anxious feeling you had away as you sat down reluctantly as Nanami went into the changing room. Well...at least she was smiling and she was happy...With each outfit Nanami tried out and giggled, you giggled with her and maybe things weren’t so bad after all…

“What a perfect day.” Nanami hugged you close as she sighed, yawning as you looked up at the sky in awe, you had seen a single star while living in Tokyo before, but now it was filled with constellations and millions of stars that stretched for miles. You could stare at it for days and days. The sun had just set a little over half an hour ago and you were ready to retire and find something to eat at the apartment.

You and Nanami had tried going to the food court but much to your dismay everything had been...rotten...soiled and ruined, meaning there was no point in trying to find anything there and you were getting really hungry despite devouring bags of chips you had both got at the convenient store, another thing that stood out to you was that there was no electricity...at all..

Looking back up to the sidewalk something caught your eyes...was that…! Light!? “Hey! Nanami look!” You shook her making her squeak as she looked up ahead, “It’s the hospital! They have electricity there which means there’s other people! Of course! Why didn’t we think to check essential areas!? Come on! Lets go! I wanna figure out what happened.”

“Alright! It sucks that this is already over but at least I can finally charge my phone, the battery is pretty low.” Nanami nodded in agreement as you both made your way up the road.

The walk wasn’t too far and you felt excitement fill you at the sight of the hospital all lit up as you walked into the entrance, a frown slowly setting on your lips once more as you walked past the receptionist desk and…! Oh there’s other people!

You felt relief wash over your as you ran up, there were at least seven other other people here at least! “Hey! Guys oh my god. I thought everyone was gone! What’s going on?” You asked, smiling bright in relief that you and Nanami weren’t the only ones left behind. Was this some kind of evac point or…?

Silence ensued and you slowly began to frown as you felt everyone stare at you as if you were insane, “Um…” You wrapped a hand around your arm, suddenly feeling as if everyone knew something you didn’t, “What’s going on…?” You furrowed your brows as you tilted your head, unsure of why everyone was looking at you like this.

Somebody looked like they were going to talk to you, a guy relatively around your age but a woman stopped him- his girlfriend maybe? “Stop, the less that know the better chance we have.” She said quietly though you still heard just enough. Fear twisted inside you as you took a cautious step back...The...the less you knew?

“Wow, you guys are assholes,” A girl suddenly whistled out, she was sitting in a waiting chair, a cowboy hat on her head paired with distressed jeans and...a bikini top? Strange but you’d roll with it if it meant getting answers. She stood up as she offered a smile, “Akari, nice to meet ya’. You folk must be new to the Borderlands huh?” She jutted her bottom lip a little as you frowned.

“Um I’m Y/n and this is my sister Nanami...?” You introduced yourself despite feeling confused as you raised a brow, “Borderlands…?” You echoed, what was that supposed to be? Other than Tokyo?

Akari gave a nod as she let out a brief chuckle, as if amused by your confusion but you sensed she had no real ill will unlike....your eyes checked to the couple that stood off in the corner on their own, “That’s what they call it here,” She nodded in affirmation as your eyes darted back to her in confusion, “To be frank with ya’, I don’t have a damn clue what's going on. Nobody does. But ever since you crossed the threshold there’s no going back, so I’ll be brief. We’re all considered outsiders here and we participate in games at venues such as this to extend our stay.”

Nanami and you looked at one another confused as Akari waved you over to the table in front of a TV, “Here, you’ll wanna put these on, it’s for the game.” She explained as you carefully picked up the metal bracelet, something about it felt ominous as you reluctantly put it on, jumping at the way it latched together and there was no getting it off now, “Word of advice, just don’t panic and you probably won’t die.”

“What?!” You screeched as Akari smacked your back, panic evident in your voice as you turned around to face her making her laugh again, this girl was insane! She had to be! “You’re…! You’re joking!”

Akari wrinkled her nose as she tilted her head, “Ah shit, I wish I was- Oh…! There’s the last player!” Just on que everyone turned to look at who had arrived, someone heaving breaths with their hands on their knees as if they had sprinted. You were mildly worried at why he seemed so scared but you had a feeling that was the least of your problems right now.

“Y/n what’s going on…?” Nanami frightened grabbed your arm as she hid a little behind you due to all these immensing strangers that looked like they were ready to feed you to the sharks, literally.

The guy walked past you both as he put on his bracelet, your eyes sharp as you watched it latch together automatically, your gaze jumping to everyone's wrists to notice you were all now wearing one. The TV suddenly lit up.

Game

You squinted your eyes a little at the sight of the screen, just what were you about to unwillingly participate in…?

Difficulty: 5♣

“The game you will be participating in is, Monster under the bed.”

A playing card? Monster under the bed? Your brows furrowed as you looked at Nanami who shrugged a little despite her concerned expression, looking just as confused as you. You could’ve made a joke out of this, surely it would’ve been easier. Maybe everyone would bust out laughing and you’d be at the end of a poor joke but...somehow you felt that wasn’t the case. Thus paying very close attention to whatever was on this screen,

“Everyone will be sectioned off into pairs by the number chosen on your bracelet, when the doors to the ward open you will have three rounds ten minutes each to figure out who is the monster under the bed that must be returned to its own, once the ten minutes is up you must hide before you are found. If the selected pair that is the monster is chosen correctly it’s a Game Clear. If the monster is not found by the end of the third round or if the pair fails to hide it’s a Game Over.”

Rules:

Once the doors are open you and your partner must find a hiding spot by the time limit

Both partners must be hidden. If one is exposed to the monster it’s a Game Over for both partners

There will be an X marked on the ground to place the monster of your guess onto.

You will have three rounds of ten minutes each to find the monster.

Any attempt to remove bracelets results in a Game Over

If the monster is not found by the third round a Game Over.

The only Game Clear condition required is for the monster to be returned by the third round.

What…

What!?

“Now the game will commence, you have five minutes to figure out who you have been paired up with before the doors open.”

Your mind was blanking as you watched everyone look down at their bracelet, hurriedly you lifted your arm as your mind blanked 2 looking back at Nanami her lips were already quivering as she sniffled lifting her arm in defeat as your lips dropped open, 5.

“Hey! Guess you’re my partner!” Akari grinned as she wrapped an arm around Nanami who sniffled, “Oh…” She looked between you both, “Oh! Oh don’t worry! We’re not the monster so I’ll make sure your sister lives! You should go find your partner.”

Your hands trembled unsure of what to do before you went to hug Nanami, “Whatever happens just stay calm okay! I need to go find my partner now!” You whispered, kissing her cheek as she sniffled while nodding.

Everybody was shuffling around looking for their partner now, you passed by a few people, 4, 1, 3...did you even have a partner…? You scanned around, your throat tightening a little in panic, there had to be a mistake! There were only 8 people surrounding you- you yelped at the tight grip that suddenly held your arm forcing you to turn around to be met with a white hooded figure, a lollipop handle hanging and earbuds in before sighing, “So it appears I’m stuck with someone useless.” The man concluded as he stood up making you back away a little as your lips parted somewhat indignantly.

How...how rude! You looked up, unable to fully make out his face but you could tell you didn’t like him one bit, “I’ll…! First of all I’m not useless! I’m just trying to understand what's going on! This is insane! We aren’t actually going to die from this, are we!?” Pushing his hood down you were immediately met with a snide gaze and cat eyes that leered at you like you were nothing more then dirt beneath his feet, long blonde hair pushed behind his shoulders and his bangs hanging low, suddenly a viscous side smile appeared on his lips, “Apparently so, otherwise I wouldn’t have watched half my last game get their brains blown out and the other half hung.”

You reeled a little away from the blonde, your face dropped in semi horror, unsure if this was just a sick joke or he was serious. You searched his face a thousand times over, but for the first time in your life, you couldn’t figure out what his goal was. You couldn’t figure out anything about him, except he was exceptionally cold, “Well I don’t suppose I have much choice to doubt you,” He said with an annoying sing song tone as he rattled his wrist that showed the bracelet with a matching 2 on it, “My name is Chishiya, just stay out of my way and we’ll both live.”

How arrogant! You scoffed as he walked past you, not the least bit bothered at your offense as you whipped around, glaring at his back. How come out of everyone you got stuck with the most…! Pompous! Arrogant! Ugh! You crossed your arms as you followed behind him, stilling secretly sending daggers into his back with your eyes as everyone shuffled into the ward.

Hospital beds were scattered around the room, a few closets and one large vent at the bottom right corner of the room ahead.

“Wait, what is this?” The first person to speak was a fair thin older gentleman, he appeared friendly as he observed the room around him, everyone looked around in confusion as you noticed what he meant.

Any possible hiding spot was covered by either sheets of metal or locked tight...How were any of you supposed to hide if…!? The rules mentioned nothing about solving puzzles to gain access to a hiding spot!

“Forget that,” Another man said with a sneer he was broad and a bit older, well into his late twenties at least, perhaps a gym coach? Or maybe a wrestler of some sort? He looked like he could break you and nearly every other person in this room like a twig, “We need to figure out who’s the monster. “ He cracked his knuckles as you leered a little away and nobody spoke for a second.

Of course, who would out themselves as the monster, more importantly, how does one even know they’re the monster? You could immediately feel tension rise as the previous, more patient man spoke, a little more collected, “How about we just check one another's’ watches! If anywhere it would show us on that! One pair should work on solving these puzzles here so everyone has a place to hide”

“Unless the monster is among us and it sabotages us so we all die by the time limit.” The girlfriend crossed her arms as she darted her eyes around. Truthfully you didn’t know what to believe, the wording on the soundbox was rather confusing as to just what were you looking for. Was the monster supposed to be in the group or it’s own entity?

“If that were the case it would’ve showed up on our watches, which it didn’t. So that won’t work.” Chishiya spoke matter of fact, his tone cool as his eyes gazed across the room before he walked away from the group inspecting various hiding spots granted you didn’t think he was about to help anyone but himself, if anything you were at least lucky that him securing a hiding spot meant it was one for you as well.

You looked at everyone in confusion, some arguing while others scattered to look for a hiding spot as the clock ticked down. You breathed in relief at the sight of Nanami and Akari both going for a bed to hide under. Your gaze finally found Chishiya’s form before following him, unsure of what you were supposed to do, if anything outside trying to figure out just what the monster even was.

You glanced up at the digital clock that stood above the entrance you had just come in from, it was already a minute in before you searched the floor where you found a red X in the center of the room, that must’ve been the...what? Offering spot? You cringed a little at the idea. Looking forward you peered behind Chishiya’s shoulder deciding to not think about that, it seemed the metal sheet that had wrapped around the bed and was sealed to the ground was locked by some sort of metal device…? Contraption? Lock?

“Isn’t hiding under a bed a bit obvious…?” You frowned as you crossed your arms, unsure as you looked behind your shoulder once more to where accusations were already being thrown in the group.

“The vent is a decoy to make you waste time, I already checked,” Chishiya replied, his fingers nimble as they rattled the metal, “And even if someone were to accomplish it in the time limit it’s the most obvious spot the monster would first check. Next would be the closet given it’s at eye level and the first thing one is drawn too when they walk into a room.”

Your lips parted a little in surprise at his assessment...obviously he wasn’t just overconfident, “And why this spot?” If he had really thought about all this in less than a minute then...did he have a reason for this spot? You now found yourself, slightly less annoyed and a little more curious as to what was going on in his mind.

“If the monster were to check a bed it would be after his eyes are drawn to the closet. Next in that line of sight would be the vent directly across it, which would be his next place to look if not his first and vice versa. The beds are all staggered throughout the room making them less conspicuous compared to the other hiding places, the bed on the far end of the room would be no good.”

Your brows furrowed in curiosity at his assessment as you watched Chishiya blow a piece of hair from his face, wiggling out one piece of the knotted metal, “It’s too far from the entrance where as the one in the middle is by average the one most people would start with, where as the first? It’s almost too soon in the start to look there thus making it the safest.”

“It’s them! They’re over there conspiring!” You both twisted around to watch the broad man point an accusing finger at you both as your eyes darted from him to the clock on the wall, which read at six minutes. A few other pairs, relievingly so was your sister had started working on a hiding spot while a few others stood around and argued.

Your face coiled a little as you replied, not appreciating the accusation to such a baseless accusation, did they not realize the longer they argued the less time they had to secure a hiding spot? “Someone who’s terrible at playing the minority would often be the first to point fingers. There’s only six minutes left before the first round is over and we need to hide. But if you want to talk about this then sure,”

You stepped closer as you crossed your arms, scanning over him before continuing, “Let’s talk about the chances of you being the monster, ever since you first came in you’ve been all twitchy and acting like something is wrong. Even when we first got paired up, you seemed a little panicked. Anyways,” You turned around as you spoke, “How do we know one pair is a monster and not one single person?”

“Eh,” Akari sat on the bed that her and Nanami chose as Nanami fumbled to work out the puzzle, she had always been good at those! You felt assured as your heart beat frantically at the idea of them not being able to get a hiding spot in time, “Let’s all calm down,” She gave an awkward laugh, “This isn’t a hearts game, we shouldn’t divide our trust. This is a team building after all which means this game should be making us work together, the last thing we need to do is throw that away on our own accord.”

“...Team building?” You frowned as you murmured having not been aware that this was some sort of game category...Hearts? Clubs? The memory of the playing card flashing on the screen appeared in your mind again, right...was that to stand for some kind of game genre? If Clubs stood for team building then...there should be no reason that the monster is any of you. Why would they even suggest that to begin with?

Then...what was the monster?

“One minute remaining.”

The lights suddenly began flickering, “Got it.” Chishiya yanked the last piece of metal undone as he pulled the sheet of metal off, everyone was now scrambling and the few who had not done their puzzle were now panicking. Getting down you crawled under the bed, your back flat to the ground as you inhaled sharply as you noticed the lights beginning to dim, “This is...uncomfortable.” You mumbled, trying to ignore being pressed shoulder to shoulder with a man you didn’t even know besides him having a god complex, “We should’ve went with the vent.”

“By all means, if you want to try and get yourself killed already. Go for it.” You turned to look at him, dark endless cat eyes meeting you as you harshly glared at him, why was he so condescending!?

You were about to snap back something before you realized it was completely dark and the door slammed open causing you to jump. Was your heart always this loud? You could see the heavy boots step against the ground making you unsteadily inhale, swallowing as you closed your eyes. You could only place your trust that Chishiya hadn’t picked a horrible spot.

More importantly your mind was plagued with worry for your sister, you had been so caught up you hadn’t even tried to help her yet...did she even…! You heard a sudden loud scream from two people causing you to stiffen as you looked up at the bed frame lined with wooden planks. You could only cower back down at blood suddenly painting the floor.

Your stomach suddenly churned as you covered your mouth. So he wasn’t lying. Chishiya however looked just as nonpulsed as he did when he first told you himself, his eyes blankly staring up at the bed frame as if this was just a regular game of hide and seek as people screamed as they were torn apart.

Or that’s at least what you assumed it was.

After an agonizing few minutes the doors finally closed and the lights flickered back on making you breath in relief as you waited a moment, could you even bear to face what was waiting on the floor? You winced a little before something caught your eye. What was with all this extra wood stuck in the frame?

Chishiya had already gotten out from under the bed and before you suddenly heard a few girls scream, your sister among them making you puff and breath as you scrambled from beneath the bed.

Standing up your mouth agape at the horrid sight of the female and the broad male that had been too focused on accusing others, they didn’t have...enough time...it looked like they had been completely mutilated, blood pouring on the floor and the smell made you want to gag as you looked away.

“Well, now what do we do.” Akari scratched her head, also not looking phased that two people had just been brutally killed. Your eyes stayed placed on the bodies before they slowly trailed to your hands, the memory of blood staining them still fresh in your mind.

“Well we have to figure out where the monster is?” The girlfriend of the couple spoke up, she looked around somewhat suspiciously, “But I’m not sure where we could find it? Maybe it has to do with the bracelets? Maybe there’s a clue hidden.”

“Oh what about in the cabinets?” The collected man from before offered as he went to search the cabinets, your frown furthered as you glanced around. Everyone was now getting along, still on edge but along at least.

Chishiya only leaned against the wall, his hands in his pocket as he rolled the lollipop in his mouth, his gaze the same steely one it was before as if he had done his job in securing his temporary salvation and was now done.

Or maybe he just didn’t know what to do? It was obvious his strength didn’t lie in teamwork, clearly. But then again, you weren’t sure what was going on, you couldn’t get a read on him. Crossing your arms you stayed beside him, your eyes briefly washing over your sister who was working Akari to dig through a desk together.

“Cabinets and drawers are too obvious.”

Chishiya’s eyes flickered to your figure, his expression just as cold if not...a little smug maybe? He said nothing in return as you continued, “If we’re looking for a monster, it’s obvious it’s a metaphor for something. Inanimate most likely,” Your eyes flickered around the room, inhaling sharply, why did it feel like the answer was right in front of you?

Think…! You glanced at the clock, only six minutes left. The rounds were really short…! “It’d be something small and inconspicuous, something that’s in plain sight….but easy to miss...and the game said it was a pair which means there’s more than likely two.”

“Three,” You glanced at Chishiya as he spoke, pulling the lollipop from his mouth, that permanent smug look on his face as he answered, “Two is what they want you to think and if you spend a round searching for each like they hope it’s game over by three.”

You rubbed your neck as you frowned, “It’s already the second round and we haven’t even found one…” You glanced around before you suddenly perked up, “Wait…!” Getting back down on the floor you laid on your back as you pushed yourself under the bed, “Chishiya! Help me get this thing out!”

Within a moment the blonde appeared as well, his eye sharp and keen as they noticed straight away what you were tugging at, “You think this is the monster?”

You looked at him as you raised a brow, “We have less than four minutes left on our second round, you have a better idea?” Chishiya said no more but helped regardless, successfully with the both of you maneuvering it around from beneath the wooden boards you managed to get it out.

Holding it up you looked at it, “It’s a poppet doll.” You turned to face him as you smiled in accomplishment, “They’re typically used as curses to place upon people in folklore. If anything is a monster, this would be it.”

Excited at your first victory you pulled out from beneath the bed as you waved it up, “Hey guys! We need to start looking for something similar to this! If not a replica.” Everyone huddled around you examining the doll before the microphone sounded, “One minute remaining.”

Everyone had immediately scrambled back to their hiding place as you ran to the red X, placing the poppet on it, that's the reason that had to be there right!? You’d just have to see, hurriedly you ran back to your spot under the bed. Making it just in time as the lights flickered off.

The door slamming open once more as you slowly inhaled, it had to work right? If not...then you were at a loss for what to search for and you were utterly screwed.

The boots stomped against the floor past the bed as you closed your eyes, unable to calm yourself. After a moment you heard a screech and something rip open before screams followed making you jump. Chishiya’s eyes were on the feet that stood by the closet that had been obviously ripped open.

You heard the sound of something wet and a gurgle before a body slumped to the floor and you could hear begging before something got snapped in half causing you to close your eyes once more...Did you make it angry!? Was that not it? Fuck. You had never felt this stressed before as it roamed around, passing in front of your bed as you tensed.

Was this your last moment alive? Truly?

Much to your relief, the door closed once more before the lights followed, flickering on, relaxing a little you sighed as you reluctantly got out from underneath the bed with Chishiya to see what had happened. Much to your horror it was the man who had been so kind this whole game and his partner.

The monster didn’t check anywhere in the first round, yet he did this round? You tried to block out the bodies slumped in the corner as you glanced at the red X, the poppet doll gone.

“Why- why were they killed!” Nanami’s eyes began to water as she grabbed her head, “This makes no sense!”

“If it accepts the doll that means we only need two more. What happened to them is irrelevant.” Chishiya stuffed his hands back into his pocket as you glared at him sideways, not appreciating his careless tone. You could deal with it, but you didn’t want your sister dragged into it.

Grabbing your chin you thought about it for a moment, “Well...the game said to return the monster to its own and…” You glance down at the X, was there some kind of unsaid rule that if you didn’t get all three of them on the first try that it would start hunting down players? “How would a mother feel if they only returned one of its children?”

“This thing doesn’t have feelings,” The girlfriend of the partners replied coldly, her eyes like steel of her own as she clung to her boyfriend, “It’s as he said,” She waved to Chishiya, “It doesn’t matter, we’ll be like them if we don’t figure this out.”

You glanced around the room, “Tell me this, if it doesn’t matter, then why did they give us all these different hiding spots?” Everyone was silent, all eyes on you as if your question didn’t make any sense, your eyes flickered to the clock that was nearing eight minutes, you didn’t have time to monologue, “No think about it. The monster never intended to look for us- that was never stated in the rules. So why did they give us all of these choices if we only needed one per pair? My point being, if we found one poppet in our hiding spot then...You get where I’m going with this? Chishiya.”

He glanced up at you acknowledgement as you curved a brow, your lips threatening to tug into a smile as you tilted your head, “How confident are you in solving that vent?”

He glanced back down and for the first time, you watch a cocky wide smirk twist onto his lips, “You’re lucky to have someone as smart as me here to be able to open it.” You tucked your tongue into your cheek as in annoyance as he sauntered over to the vent already getting to work, “As for everyone else, we need to open up as many of these as possible to find the other two.”

Everyone immediately scrambled to get to work, with only seven minutes on the clock this was...going to be difficult. First Nanami and Akari searched all the opened spots as you worked on another bed. Rubbing your head as muttered, “Shit...I never was good with puzzles.” You awkwardly hung your head in defeat temporarily, briefly letting your eyes shift to Chishiya who was fiddling with several locks, his gaze sharp and you couldn’t even imagine all the calculations going on in his mind. You were somewhat envious of what it would be like to be that perceptive to anything adhering to logic and solution.

“Aha! Found one!” Akari yanked the poppet from the top of the closest as Nanami covered her mouth, looking like she was gonna throw up being so close to so many dead bodies. You ignored the grisly sight at the second victory of the poppet doll. Akari quickly placed it on the X as you began to work on the puzzle once more, looking up at the clock. Oh no...Oh no there was only three minutes left!

“Chishiya! Hows that puzzle coming along.” You called out, trying not to sound alarmed but you could see the clear cut annoyance on his face as he continued working through the locks, “If you’d like to help while struggling on a novice lock feel free.” He replied condescendingly, not appreciating the pressure.

You rolled your eyes with huff as you finally managed to get it undone, feeling triumphant as you searched under the bed but there was no luck, “There’s nothing here!”

“Or here!”

Several people called out as well as you rubbed your head, standing up, “If the only other place that hasn’t been searched is the vent then maybe there’s only two? It did say a pair.” You felt a lump of anxiety well in your chest at the sight of the clock ticking close to a minute and half.

“Should we really take the risk?” The boyfriend asked as he rubbed his neck, concern on his face as he looked around, “If we’re wrong then we’ll all…”

You hadn’t even thought of that…

“...! Hey.” You turned to Chishiya who seemed to be trying to get your attention making you immediately come over, if he was asking for you it’d have to be for something important given there was nearly less then two minute on the clock, “Hold this right here.” He immediately pushed your hand onto the lock right where he wanted it, “This is a two handle mechanism meaning that there needs to be two people unlocking it. Push down and out at the same time.”

“Hide! Everyone needs to hide now!”

The lights were beginning to flicker as everyone scrambled to hide, stress evidently put on your shoulders now more than ever. You could only hope he was right with your life on the line, “Now!” You pushed down on your side, the lock sliding as you pulled out, pulling a piece of metal holding up the lock directly out as Chishiya did the same with his side.

The lock fell off as well as the metal of the gate of the vent, you immediately with no hesitation leaned inside it was dark and hard to make it out anything besides the steep drop off. So he was right, this was a waste of time for a hiding place.

Looking down you caught sight of wood before laughing in relief, “It’s here! Wait shit! Chishiya! It’s too far down in the vent, you’re gonna have to lower me down to reach it. Time?”

“Forty five seconds.” You felt unfamiliar hands on your hips lifting you up as you were lowered down, “We have time.”

You squinted trying to see as you reached down, “Lower me further! I’m not quite in reach,” Your muscles began to ache in your shoulder as you reached harder, growling in frustration, “Time!?” You were lowered a little further, the wooden poppet brushing against your fingers.

“Thirty seconds! Could you go a little faster?”

“Could you lower me a little quicker- Ah! Hey did you almost let go!?” You snarled back, grabbing the poppet doll, giving a good yank as it lodged in between the crevice it was in, “Get me back up! I got it. Time!”

“Twenty seconds.” Chishiya called back, pulling you up as you gasped, pain from the metal jabbing into your stomach evident as you were met with a darkening room. Setting your feet firmly on the floor your eyes flew to the flock fifteen seconds and your spot was all the way across the room….!

“Where are we supposed to hide!? We can’t get all the way there in time!” You hissed out running to the X as you dropped the poppet down. The lights shut off as the final five seconds counted down and before you could do anything you were shoved to the floor as you squeaked. Your body throbbing in pain and your mouth immediately covered as you were met with the coverage of a bed but neither one of you were bold enough to try and scramble beneath it as the doors slammed open.

Fuck.

Your whole body was tense as your eyes squeezed shut, you were just a little ahead of the X here, if this is all the poppet dolls...they’d have no reason to go further into the room...unless...Your hand squeezed tight around the wrist of the hand that covered your mouth as you tried to calm yourself at the loud thudded footsteps.

It was quiet for a moment before you heard more walking before the doors closed.

“Game Cleared”

The lights turned on as you fell limp against the side of the bed, Chishiya’s hand removed from mouth as you pushed your hair from your face, closing your eyes as you breathed in relief, “Holy shit.” Was all you could mutter to yourself, you had never been more grateful to breathe air in your whole life.

“I guess you weren’t that useless after all huh.” Chishiya clacked his tongue as you turned your head to look at him, raising your brows as your face contorted into something between insult and amusement.

You’ve only known this man for a half an hour and yet...something about his words, if you dug down deep past that smug expression of his, was this a compliment? Looking away you pressed your tongue into your cheek, trying to keep from smiling, “Yeah, and you’re still conceited and arrogant but, I guess you have a good reason to be.” You glanced back at him again but you could hardly hold his gaze, something in that brief moment was electrified between you both as you laughed somewhat sheepishly, closing your eyes as you looked away once more.

What the fuck was even wrong with you? If this was back before today you would’ve totally kicked this guy in the balls and went about your day.

“Y/n!” You straightened up at the sound of Nanami’s voice, your expression brightening as you stood up, quickly running to her as you hugged her tight, “I can’t believe that just happened…” She whispered to you as she pressed her face into your neck. You couldn’t either but, you were thankful you had survived this game. Whatever it was.

“Come on, let's get out of this room.” You tugged on her arm, no longer wanting to be in this death room despite knowing it was all over. Pulling her out you paused at the sight of the TV and a...register…? You bracelet unlocked as you took it off, tossing it on the table as you tilted your head.

“Congratulations Game ''Clear ``.''

“...Now issuing visas to those who survived the game…?” You furrowed your brows as you glanced at Nanami who rubbed her head in confusion. You grabbed the receipt as you looked it over with a frown before picking up the 5 of clubs playing card along with it. Odd.

“It’s how many days you’re allowed to stay now! Almost a whole week, that's a good score for a first game!” Akari called out as she patted your back making you jump a little.

Almost a whole week…”Until we have to play again to...continue our stay?” You raised a brow, deciding not to ask what happens if you refused. While you had many questions, you had a feeling you knew the answer to that one.

A part of you couldn’t even believe this had happened, or was it all still a dream.

“Hey…! Sorry for all of that in there,” You turned to see...oh…! It was the boyfriend of the partner, the gifrlfriend stayed behind looking brooding, “I’m Ryu and that’s my girlfriend Hiroko I was...ah…” He faltered a little, rubbing the back of his neck as his gaze flittered to his girlfriend who was glaring him down, “You should stop by the Beach- I...I think you guys would make good additions! Bye!” He hurried not even finishing his original sentence before scurrying off making you furrow your brows at what he even meant.

“The hell?” Akari raised a brow as she watched the guy run off, “Seems to me he wanted to chat more…guess we know who's really pulling balls in that relationship.”

Nanami suddenly snickered, covering her mouth as she giggled, “Hey Akari! Why don’t we stay together! We did really well in the game together!”

“Awh shit, if you guys really want me too!” Akari offered a quirky smile as you laughed, you had no problems with someone staying behind with you. Looking past Akari your smile faded a little at the sight of a white hoodie exiting the entrance.

“Hey- I’ll be right back!” You pushed past the both of them who paid you no mind as you pushed out of the exit and down the stone steps, not sure why your feet were making you chase after such an egotistical man but…!

“Chishiya!” You called out, making the man pause, he turned around, pulling the earbuds out as he glanced up from his hoodie, raising his brows in acknowledgement, “Um…” Why did you even chase after him…? You stepped down the last step as you wrapped your arms around yourself.

It was silent for a moment as you berated yourself internally for why you seemed so speechless all of a sudden. Chishiya however didn’t seem to mind, his eyes absent now as he stared up at the hospital, “I used to do my clinical rotations here.”

You were broken out of your silent thrashing of internal humiliation as you raised your brows, lips parting in curiosity as you asked, “You were a doctor?”

“No,” Chishiya snorted, that amused calico look of his on his face once more as he looked down at you, “I was a medical student. Training to be a doctor but that obviously didn’t happen…” His lips curved into a frown, his eyes cold once more as they looked back up at the building, “I came here tonight to see if anyone I knew would be here.”

“Oh…” You looked away, feeling somewhat awkward and unsure of how to reply to him as silence took over once more beside the occasional rustling of the wind in the tree’s, the urge to speak overtaking you to the point you couldn't resist, “Chishiya...I…” You looked away, feeling somewhat bashful, “We...made a really good team back there.” You forced yourself to look up at him as you offered a bright yet subtly shy smile, “If you want...you could stay with us…?”

Chishiya pulled the lollipop stick from his mouth, letting it drop to the ground as he spoke, “No thanks.” You turned to him in surprise as you frowned a little, you shouldn’t have expected anything less…

“Oh...I understand.” You offered a weak smile as he turned his back on you and began to walk once more, “I just have one more question,” You called out causing him to pause, “...Do you by any chance know about a place called the Beach?”

Note: Whew...! As a lurker in the Alice in borderland fandom I saw a lot of people complaining about the lack of Chishiya fics so I decided to volunteer myself and take on for the team to write a series for this little blonde fucker so PLEASE let me know your thoughts and I hope you enjoy!! Also

#alice in borderland #aib #alice in borderland imagine #alice in borderland x reader #chishiya x reader #chishiya x reader smut #shuntaro chishiya #shuntaro chishiya x reader #aib imagine #aib x reader

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qianoir · 3 years ago

Text

Divine Lies

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Guardian angel!Winwin (WayV) x human fem!reader

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: angst

𝐑𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: 13+

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: cursing (censored), lying, stealing, cheating, family problems, mentions of death, mentions of suicide, mentions of self-harm, brief mention of sex, abandonment, blasphemy, reader is an implied only child

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 2.4K

𝐓𝐚𝐠 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭: @staysstrays

Preview

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned. I have worked as a guardian with the style of Lucifer. “Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image,” I have reversed this commandment and given it life to a body of the soul I vowed to protect. Cast upon me a punishment, for I have wandered too far from your holy grail.

Si Cheng Dong, Guardian Angel #1028

Si Cheng knew you from the day you were born. You had marks dangling from your shoulder blades like the torn wings of an angel. He had asked God about the dainty marks, but He said his eyes must be tempted by the Demon of Trickery because no marks appeared to be decorating your back as he said. When he is assigned one of His children to protect, he knows nothing of God’s plan that is unique to every one person. His plan and your decisions were lived through Si Cheng’s eyes as well.

“What is behind your back?” Si Cheng interrogated your five year old self.

“Nothing…” He yanked your hands to unclasp, forcing them to drop the chocolate you had stolen from the convenient store you and your parents had just left.

“Your mother said you could not have this, yet you took it anyway and without paying. That is wrong.” You could only look with deceptively innocent eyes as your guardian took the sweet into the store, placing it back on the shelf you had tip-toed up to.

“Come on, Y/N dear.” Your mother called for you to follow her and your father to the car. There was no sight of Si Cheng, even when you had gotten into the car. Only a couple of miles from the store did he appear in the seat next to you. He looked over to see your closed mouth moving ever so slightly.

“What is in your mouth?” You shook your head and continued to chew slowly, trying to be as unapparent as possible. He continued to stare you down in silence, watching as you finally swallowed what he felt in his heart was something else that you stole. Breaking the intense eye contact, you turned around to look out of the car window. The ride was already silent, but a darkly mixed feel swam in your spine after Si Cheng’s next comment.

“Thou shalt not steal. You will be punished for that sin.”

...

As you blossomed into adulthood, the divine morals you had been taught by your covenant Christian parents seemed to have exited your mind. You were one of the top names of your college's Dean’s list, but the your personal out-of-school extracurriculars could mistake you for a completely different person. Your academic abilities were almost God-given, yet you showed Him no gratitude.

Si Cheng had been by your side to witness each time you strayed away from God. However, it was not his place to direct you back to Him, that choice was wholly your own. Each night since you turned 18, after reading his Bible out loud to you, he left for Heaven. You always told him that you would be in bed through the night, awaiting his return.

Those nights were spent sleeping through the day and partying at different clubs, downing bottles of red wine like a Black Christian. During one night out, you had thrown an empty bottle of Giuseppe Quintarelli into the unknown while walking out of the club; an incident you had forgotten until two police officers showed up on your doorstep with pictures from the club’s security cameras, portraying your indecent act.

Not much of the confrontation could be interpreted or remembered in your hazily hungover brain, but you do remember everything after you shouted a very pathetic “That’s not me!” because your hands were cuffed behind your waist and soon anxiously gripping the bars of the chair behind you at the station.

“What happened?” Si Cheng walked out of the wall when the police left you alone to discuss your charges.

“I forgot to pay for chocolate at the store today It's not—"

“Do not lie to me, Y/N.” You gave him silence. “How could you act in such a way?”

“If you know the answers, then why do you always ask questions?” The light from the interrogation room’s light kindled your eyes when you looked up at him, but you took unusual comfort in the pain.

“I’m trying to help you to understand your sins, but you never learn.”

“You could have stopped me, you’re my guardian ang—” “Yes and I am not you.” Si Cheng gripped the bridge of his nose before speaking again, “I protect you from unrighteous harm. Your actions have consequences with which I cannot interfere.”

Suddenly feeling very nauseous, you wretched forward, your cuffed hands gliding up your spine. A mix of drunken liquids racing from your throat, onto the floor and your distressed jeans. Si Cheng took your hair up, sitting behind you, rubbing your back when you failed to vomit and fearfully gagged.

He was ready to save you when he heard you starting to choke, but took your vulnerable soul into his arms when he realized you had started sobbing.

This was a normal occurrence for you two.

Every day, you would wake up thinking the thoughtless decision you had made the night prior was just a nightmare, but would fall apart when dealing with the consequences. Si Cheng would be there to comfort you and recite something religious that would travel a non-permeable route through your two ears. When you were back to feeling yourself— or what was left of yourself— you would sin again and lie to your guardian about it. Then Si Cheng would read you a bit of The Bible to sleep every night, for when morning comes, your morning s.hit would be on the sacred book once again.

“My back hurts…” You cried out. Si Cheng kept holding you.

“You tempt me.” Si Cheng announces as he waits for you to finish your nightly routine, Bible in hand. He decided to stop sleeping at his home in Heaven and would instead be wherever you were to take away the matches you light your fire with.

“Well I mean we don’t always have to pray when we’re in the bedroom.” The sleeping shirt takes its sweet time to cover your breasts before his angelic eyes.

“Not sexually.” Si Cheng rolls his eyes and chooses his next words carefully for your innuedic mind. “When you lie to me, I want so badly to tell you off. To make certain that no such fibs should ever fall from your lips again.”

“Sounds frustrating. Are you sure you don’t want to just go have sex?”

“The seed falling among the thorns refers to someone who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, making it unfruitful.” Your guardian recited, ignoring your offer.

“The what now?”

“Matthew 13:22. Just because I hear the lies you tell, does not mean I should engorge in them by talking back or forcing you to be something you are not.”

“And what am I not again?”

“Holy.”

“D.amn straight.” Si Cheng huffed in exasperation of his inability to get through to you, opening his Bible once you settled in bed next to him. This was the final part of your nightly routine.

…

Si Cheng ended your nightly prayers. “We send this message to You in the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.”

“I’m an atheist.” You say with your eyes already closed.

“How could you say that when I exist?”

“You’re not real. It’s all in my head because since the day I was born, I was not right. If God were real, he wouldn’t have made me this way.”

“You are not an atheist.” Your eyes open halfway.

“How can you decide what I am and what I am not?”

“You would not be so angry at God if you were an atheist. They are non-believers, not betrayers.”

…

The next morning, you wake up in an empty bed. Finally. There was no sign of Si Cheng along the walk from the bedroom, to the bathroom, to the hallway, down the stairs, or to the kitchen, where you sat down to enviously admire the dying rose bouquet trapped in a blue China vase.

The front door bursts open and in comes Si Cheng with two handfuls of goods you had mostly already bought. He walks to the dining table as soon as he spots you, laying out the groceries in front of you.

Angel Soft toilet paper, Angel food cake mix, a sack of Angelina plums, Victoria’s Secret Angel perfume, and a CD of Chancellor and TaeYeon’s “Angel.”

“What is all of this?”

“To remind you that angels are all around you. And we are sad that you do not wish to accept us.”

“Angels, always looking for human validation huh?” Si Cheng bites back his tongue at your passive comment.

“I also got you this.” Sicheng gingerly places a luxe Bible in your hands, with a grandiose “belonging to Y/N” engraved under “The Bible”, complimenting the gold edges of the dainty pages.

“I don’t want to read it.”

“Liar.”

“Excuse me?”

“I can tell the quality of it catches your eye and entices you to want to read. Humans, always wanting the most or nothing at all.” Si Cheng savors the way you glare at him sideways for his mirrored comeback to your insult.

“Let us read it in the bedroom before starting our day.” And you don’t know if you are too tired or desperate or want him to shut up with this religious nonsense, but you go up to the bedroom with him anyway.

“It doesn’t make any sense, Si Cheng! Why would God make me just to torment me? After everything I have done to d.amn myself and spite Him, how could he ever take me as one of His own children?”

You sat in the bathtub, soaking in a mixture of the darkest red wine and gasoline, the color staining the tub and your skin with the darkest black, the color making the markings on your back more defined than ever.

For the past hour, you had been threatening to end it all and managed to rope the divine being into the most intense argument. His hands gripped your arms to keep you from going under, but could not even begin to think about pulling you out with the ear piercing screams you let out between comebacks.

Despite his greatest efforts, Si Cheng had to admit that he was never able to help you get back on a good path. “I am going to Hell and you can’t save me. He has failed both me and you”

“He has failed neither me nor you. How dare you speak of the Heavenly Father in such vulgar form.” His anger rose and teeth tried not to bare animalistically behind his lips. In a way, you were right and Si Cheng knew this. He had been the cause of such deathly marks to appear on your back in response to the resentment building up in his heart to have to wake and sleep with your sins.

“Then show me! Take me to God and show me that he is real. Let me hear from Him that He wants me for good and not for sport.” Your body weighted his hands down as the stinging in your back made you lightheaded.

“He has told you. Your entire life, He has told you. He speaks through me and I am one of his most trusted children.” Still desperately trying to pull you up, Si Cheng could not focus on saving you and controlling the pain he was unconsciously inflicting on your flesh.

“You are not God. You are just an angel who has disappointed Him, like me.”

“We are not alike.” Si Cheng’s grasp unravelled from your arms, letting them sink back under the black liquid.

“You are a sinful woman.”

“Where are you going?” You screeched at him, trying to fight your back from folding itself. Tears were now falling without control as you realized you had really done it this time.

“Heaven. See you there.”

The pain suddenly halted. Si Cheng left and another angel entered. Upon seeing your body partially submerged in Christ’s Blood and Devil’s fuel, he lifted you from the tub and rid you from the onyx glaze. He never spoke a word to you for the rest of your life by your side.

And you could only assume that it was because “The seed falling among the thorns refers to someone who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke the word, making it unfruitful.” (Matthew 13:22)

𝐎𝐜𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟖. 𝟗𝟖 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐋𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫.

“Happy birthday, Number 1028!” A party hat was forced onto Sicheng’s head by Archangel of Love Number 6, poking through his halo like a cloudy mountain.

“Hey! It’s my birthday, too!” Archangel of Birth Number 1028 pouted at being one-upped by his Brother in Christ.

“Yes, but it’s Guardian Angel Number 1028’s birthday.” Number 6 clarifies, using his title to mockingly signify importance.

“Such social hierarchy is hellish! This is Heaven!”

“Right, it is finally the year you are no longer banned from Earth and can be a guardian again!” The angels gather around Si Cheng to "ooh" at his year of redemption.

“It is my loyal duty to serve God with the occupation he gifts me.” He dismisses their awe with words of loyalty to his creator.

“She is ready.” His Heavenly Father calls for His Guardian Angel Number 1028 to meet his valuable assignment.

When he walks into the incubation room, Si Cheng is met with the eery feeling of deja vu. A disheartening sense of nostalgia washes over him as well. Then he sees a design on the fertilized egg in the incubator.

Those marks.

The scarring on the biological sphere are like vents that send the aromas of Giuseppe Quintarelli and Diesel gasoline to his nose.

Si Cheng suddenly could no longer feel the comfort of his halo, fear zapped through him as he could feel evil beings tempting him through all four walls of the incubation room instead. Light burning aches and agonizing pains danced along his back.

His vision went black and his mind regressed to 9 months before this October day, 118 years ago. The Heavenly Father took his body, that was wrapped up in his mother’s egg and his father’s sperm, into His hands and placed him next to yours, both of your fertilized compartments looking like identical twins.

“You have much still to learn, my son.”

*Black Christian = A Christian who betrays God, like Archangel Lucifer betraying Jesus and becoming Satan.

𝘲𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘪𝘳

#wayv x reader #wayv imagines #wayv angst #nct x reader #nct imagines #nct angst #winwin x reader #winwin imagines #winwin angst #qianoir

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godsporncollection · 4 years ago

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Saturday Morning Session

(personal commentary in italics) (sorry for how inconsistent i am at this, i’m trying new medication, so my focus comes and goes unpredictably, but i didn’t want this to take weeks)

Russel M Nelson - strengthen your testimony (?)

"I understand better what he meant when he said 'behold, i will hasten my work in this time.'"

Y'all have been strengthening your testimonies and i, and your children, thank you. did that inclusion of "your children" feel off to anyone else?

I can see the work on the temple outside my window and that makes me think about how we need to remove the old debris from our lives. I too think of the temple as 'old debris' that should be removed from my life.

"the gospel is a message of joy" I cannot roll my eyes hard enough

that was short. what was the topic? blab for a five minutes?

Dieter F. Uchdorf - god is Among Us

I had to move lots when I was a kid because there was a war on. i thought about the missionaries who came to the country of their enemies to bring us the gospel.

i was a kid in a war-torn country > missionaries > god has not forgotten us > we will be heirs of god > how could we complain when we have that? > the atonement > mistakes are okay, just gotta keep repenting.

what would jesus teach if he was among us today? the same thing he's always taught. "the savior always teaches timeless truths, to everyone, a message of hope and belonging, a testament that god has not abandoned his children that god is Among Us."

jesus says to love one another and to be full of charity towards all men. i would like to see it.

anyone else feel like these talks are just. empty? like, they're not feeling it either?

if jesus came into your home today, he would see into your heart and i'm gonna waste a couple more minutes by expanding on that. one look into his eyes and we would be forever changed by the realization that god is Among Us.

back to me, i wish i could go back and tell myself to stay on the right track because god is Among Us, so i'm gonna tell you instead. god is Among Us.

"line upon line" *gag*

god is Among Us

Joy D Jones - abuse is wrong unless you use it to teach kids about the gospel

"have you ever wondered why we call 'primary' 'primary'?" as someone who understands how language works, no.

because kids are importanter than everything else

god trusts us to be nice to our kids; that means no abuse, even if we're angry. whoever needed this reminder should be shot.

hey, maybe you can "combat the evils of abuse" by not fucking raising your kids in an abusive cult!

analogy of a kid who fell out of bed because he "didn't get far enough in" = he wasn't indoctrinated enough, with awkward collage of pics of kids for a minute.

eyring said to get 'em while they're young

love all the pics of black people that try to say "see? we don't think black people are inherently evil (anymore)!"

analogy of a soldier in boot camp. drill seargants are mean, but that was necessary because apparantly it's the only way this guy can learn how to hide. also, apparently this guy is "our friend". not my friend, thanks.

"how can we do the same for our children?" don't fucking act like a drill seargent to your kids! ffs

"wouldn't we rather have them sweat in the safe learning environment of the home than bleed on the battlefields of life?" first of all, fuck you. second, dramatic much? third, fuck you, kids shouldn't have to learn about life in a hostile environment. does this woman have kids? are they okay? fucking hell, five kids were raised by a woman with this mentality. what a bitch.

"eternity is the wrong thing to be wrong about." i got news for you. of course, if i ever spoke to this machine, that topic wouldn't be my top priority.

I need a fucking drink.

Jan Eric Newman - teaching the gospel is good, but you can't force a testimony on others

anecdote about a local old woman getting birthday gifts. she taught us some good things when we were growing up, so thanks, sister davis.

another teacher, at college, was a "master teacher." he loved me and the lord. he taught me to learn doctrine on my own and that "changed me forever."

just sayin', if you're taught how to learn on your own, but didn't exercise enough critical thought to gtfo of this cult, maybe the teacher wasn't the best.

it's good to have good teachers.

the ancient nephites and lamanites had good teachers, and "there was no contention among them!"

"how can we teach more like the savior and help others become more deeply converted?" nope, nope. nope.

1st, "learn all you can about the master teacher hismelf." so, we're sticking with the term "master teacher." cool. doesn't sound weird at all.

ask yourself questions about how he taught, then do that.

read "teaching in the savoir's way."

2nd, use bullshit stories. oh, no, it's a story about how somebody is grateful for the pandemic because her adult child read the BoM for the first time during it. she said it had made "literal miracles."

3rd, "remember that conversion must come from within." guess jan and "joy" should have compared notes before speaking.

"children inheret many things, but a testimony is not one of them. we can't give our children a testimony any more than we can make a seed grow; but we can provide a nourishing environment, with good soil, free of thorns that would choke the word."

Gary E. Stevenson - kindness

story about a study where rabbits were fed a high-fat diet, but those under the care of a loving researcher didn't gain as much weight.

only christians can intuitively understand that this means there's a reason to be kind to others.

jesus said love one another.

addressing primary kids - be kind. here's a story about a kid who stopped being a bully because the bullied kid said it hurt.

to the teens - social media makes bullying worse, clearly satan is using social media against your generation. do what you can t make these spaces safer. if you're a bully, "stop it."

to the adults- "we have a primary responsibility to set a tone and be role models of kindness (get wrecked "joy"), inclusion and civility."

from ballard- "i have never heard members of this church to be anything but loving, kind, tolerant and benevolent to our friends and neighbors of other faiths." k, but, like, you know it's not just a difference of religious belief that’s the problem, right?

i'm heartbroken to hear about prejudice against blackasianlatino people or of any other group. i love how that section was really only about race, with a blanket "any other group" thrown in as an afterthought so they can't be accused of being homophobic.

in the winter of 1838, jo smith was in prison and why do you think that happened, gary?

church members were driven from their homes and the residents of a town across the river gave them food and shelter. that generosity saved the lives of many of them.

god is a compassionate care-giver.

Gerrit W. Gong - disjointed anecdotes of human experiences, idk

i miss my dad. he was adventurous, except regarding food.

i saw a guy be mean to a lady selling ice cream. he smashed all of her cones. the image of her trying to salvage the cones haunts me to this day.

story of the good samaritan.

be like christ this easter.

"we recieve inspiration as we counsel together, listening to each person, including each sister and the spirit."

does this guy have a topic?

he’s is just giving a list of random human experiences and parables.

*displays a lack of understanding of instagram.*

he's listing something throughout this, like, he keeps counting, but i have no idea what and his voice is making my adhd medication run away, so i'm not listening to this again.

Henry B. Eyring - temple worthiness

today i'm feeling light and hope, like the first day i went to the salt lake temple

i'm an oblivious fucker who didn't notice my name being pinned on me, so i thought the woman who greeted me was an angel because she knew my name.

thought he could remember being in the temple before, but a voice that was not his own (that's how you know it's true and not something he just told himself) told him he was remembering heaven.

confused "holiness to the lord" with "this is a holy place." i know both phrases use the word 'holy', but like, those contexts mean separate things.

i also had this feeling during my wedding in the logan temple.

i think henry should get checked out, he suffers from frequent hallucinations and it's good to know how your brain works differently from others when in a leadership position.

during my wedding, i had a vision of a house and the officiant said to live in a way that you can walk away easily. a year later, my father in law bought the exact house and my wife and i lived in the guest house for ten years. then i got the call to move somewhere else on assignment from the church and we walked away easily.

scripture from jesus about temples.

if you're unworthy in the temple, you won't be "able to see, by the power of the holy ghost, the spiritual teaching of the savior that we can recieve in the temple."

"when we are worthy to recieve such teaching, there can grow, through our temple experience, hope, joy, and optimism throughout our lives. that hope, joy, and optimism are available only through accepting the ordinances performed in holy temples."

i forgot how simple a baptism is, so i'm gonna tell you how amazed (and a little concerned) i was when my youngest daughter stayed to do baptism for the dead for all of the names on the list that day. maybe i'm just super comfortable in the water, but that doesn't sound hard, actually. i used to almost enjoy doing those.

quotes the primary song 'i love to see the temple.'

remember to be worthy so you can live with your family forever.

#exmo #ex mormon #exchristian #ex christian #excult #cult stuff #exlds #ex lds #former mormon #apostake #ex religious #agnostic #mine #gc april 2021 #gc summary

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mrlnsfrt · 3 years ago

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Lessons I'm Learning

As I am writing this I am currently transitioning from pastoring a church in Valdosta, Georgia to pastoring a church in Boise, Idaho. I have been studying John 14 with my church here in Valdosta and reflecting on Jesus’ words of comfort and encouragement that He shared with His disciples. Even though I am sure that God is leading in this move, it has not been easy. I am tired and have often felt overwhelmed. But I keep turning to the words of Jesus recorded in John 14. I have also been reflecting on the big lessons I have learned in ministry and life so far.

Quick Review of John 14:19-31

Jesus’ life is connected to our hope of eternal life. Because Jesus lives we can secure in the assurance that we also will live.

Having and keeping the commandments and the word of Jesus is deeply connected to loving Jesus and witnessing His revelation.

The Father will send the Helper, the Holy Spirit to teach and remind Jesus’ followers what He taught them.

Jesus gives us His peace and we should not let our hearts be troubled or afraid.

Jesus tells us what is going to happen before it does so that when it does happen we may believe in Him.

Because Jesus loves the Father He obeys the commandments of the Father.

Takeaway

What I take away from John 14:19-31 is that Jesus never abandons His followers. When Jesus left He left us His word and his commandments (I believe these two are essentially the same) and the Father sent the Holy Spirit to teach and remind Jesus’ disciples of the things Jesus said. I believe the same promise holds true to us today.

I am convinced that the Holy Spirit is available to us today to teach us all things and to bring to our remembrance all thing things that Jesus said.

But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you. - John 14:26 NKJV

To me, it is clear that the secret to our spiritual success lies in receiving the Holy Spirit. Only then can we better understand Jesus and remember His words and keep his commandments. All the things we must do we can only do with the power of the Holy Spirit.

Studying this brought to mind what seem to be two essential lessons I am learning.

Lesson 1: Pray, especially for the Holy Spirit.

Never stop praying. - 1 Thessalonians 5:17 New Living Translation

One lesson that I began to learn early in life is that prayer is important. This is the one lesson I keep re-learning in life, and I believe it is one of the most important things I do. If I am not careful, become discouraged because of my feelings of weakness and powerlessness. I often wish I had more money, I wish I had more knowledge, I wish I had more power, more strength, or whatever it is I need to be able to solve the problems of those around me. Then I remember that it is not my job to solve everyone’s problem. I can’t even solve my own problems.

I do not mean this as an excuse not to help those we are able to help. I say this to prevent you from burning out trying to accomplish something that’s not for you to accomplish. Jesus is the One who saves. God has all the power, not us. We are not Jr. Holy Spirit. We should pray, we should pray for people, we should pray with people, we should point them to Jesus. Jesus is the answer. We are His hand and feet (1 Corinthians 12 we are the body of Christ) and we should be a blessing in the lives of those around us, but we are also humans and have our limitations. Our limitations should not keep us from doing anything. We can all at least pray, and through prayer, we can do more than we could ever possibly hope to accomplish by our own strength.

Pray especially for the Holy Spirit

If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!” -Luke 11:13 NKJV

Jesus essentially tells us to ask for the Holy Spirit. Jesus tells us that the Father is willing to give the Holy Spirit to those who ask, so ask! Ask every day! Ask multiple times a day. I take this promise to heart and I pray this prayer often. I pray it because I feel a desperate need for more strength, for more wisdom and understanding, for more power to preach and teach and help and do all that I can to point others to Jesus and to reveal the character of Jesus in my own life.

I strongly believe that all the success I experienced with the Park Avenue Seventh-day Adventist Church in Valdosta, Georgia, is because of our prayer meetings and the prayers we have around the table with all the members of the church board every time we have a board meeting. I believe in prayer and we have a church board that believes in prayer.

I have enjoyed God’s blessings because I have a church and friends and family who continually pray for me and pray for God to fill me with the Holy Spirit. I don’t deserve it, but God does not bless us according to what we deserve, but rather according to His grace and His mercies and His power and His will.

It is not because of any restriction on the part of God that the riches of His grace do not flow earthward to men. If the fulfillment of the promise is not seen as it might be, it is because the promise is not appreciated as it should be. If all were willing, all would be filled with the Spirit. - Acts of the Apostles p50

Pray for wisdom

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. - James 1:5 NKJV

Another promise that I claim regularly is this one. God tells us to pray for wisdom. We are told we will receive liberally, without reproach. Why not ask? I ask all the time.

Lesson 2: Persevere

The Bible has a lot to say about perseverance.

And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. -Galatians 6:9 NKJV

Show Up!

One of the ways that I understand perseverance is simply showing up. So many seem to believe that change happens in a big flashy event. It has been my experience that the biggest changes happen gradually over time.

Spiritual growth, like many other things in life, does not take place overnight. Sure, the high events are a great blessing. Many times we experience it when we first give our hearts to Jesus or the day we are baptized. Other times it happens at the conclusion of revival meetings or a week or prayer or an evangelistic series. But life is not made up of high moments. Going to a concert of your favorite Christian musician is a great experience but it does not generate lasting change and growth by itself.

Lasting change, continual growth, comes from showing up daily. Show up for prayer. By this I mean when your eyes pop open in the morning, the first thing you should do is pray. Thank God for another day of life. Ask God to fill you with the Holy Spirit. Ask God for wisdom. Talk to God about your day, what are you excited about? What are you worried about? Tell God all about your day.

Show up for Bible study. You should be studying the Bible every day. You may call this your daily devotional. This is when you allow the word of God to challenge you, to fill your thoughts, to shape your decisions. Reading the Bible reminds you that you have bigger goals than worldly wealth and power. You have greater values than just physical pleasure. You remind yourself that you serve a mighty and powerful God, you remind yourself that eternal life is yours in Jesus. From there you go to live a life that reflects the character of the God you serve.

You show up for worship, to be spiritually fed, to be challenged, to serve, to teach, to bless. We come to church for all those reasons. In serving, in teaching, in helping, we grow. Also when we make God and worship a priority, we remind ourselves that this is important. We tell ourselves that we value God and His will for our lives when we stop everything and come together to worship and study. Christianity is meant to be experienced as a community. It is important to belong, to be involved, to contribute, to volunteer. Because that is how we grow.

Show up, be responsible, be reliable, have clear priorities, and make God your top priority. Now live like it. Determine in your heart to show up for God. Do it at church, but also at home, at school, and even in your downtime.

Show up for God regularly and you will grow spiritually.

Don not wait for a big opportunity to do something amazing, rather do your best each day with every small opportunity that presents itself to you.

The key is to yield ourselves daily to God, so that He may make us vessels fit for His use. Every day we should be improving the opportunities for service that lie within our reach. Daily we ought to be witnessing for the Master wherever we may be, whether in some humble sphere of influence in the home or in a public field of usefulness.

Don’t give up

in the hope rejoicing; in the tribulation enduring; in the prayer persevering; - Romans 12:12 Literal Standard Version

I really appreciate the Literal Standard Verison of Romans 12:12. It is a simple reminder of how we ought to live our lives. We rejoice in our hope, we endure tribulations, and we pray continually.

Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face continually. - 1 Chronicles 16:11 NASB

Don’t stop seeking God and His strength. We are not able to do it on our own. We are not meant to do it on our own. We are to seek God and His strength. He is the One who gives us the victories.

Finally, my favorite Bible passage that I often turn to and the one that keeps me from giving up.

31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? 33 Who shall bring a charge against God’s elect? It is God who justifies. 34 Who is he who condemns? It is Christ who died, and furthermore is also risen, who is even at the right hand of God, who also makes intercession for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? 36 As it is written:

“For Your sake we are killed all day long; We are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.”

37 Yet in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us. 38 For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, 39 nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. - Romans 8:31-38 NKJV

This passage keeps me from giving up because it reminds me that nothing can separate me from the love of God. The way I see it, the only way I lose is if I give up. I know for sure that God won’t give up on me. So I just have to live one day at a time, take one step at a time, just keep showing up, because I know I can count on God to show up.

#practical

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tbhwhocaresanymore · 5 years ago

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Nancy Drew 1x16

Oh my God you guys it has been so long since I have been able to watch a show that is so well written that has clearly been planned out from the beginning where the viewers have been able to theorize and have it pay off and Jesus Christ it is GLORIOUS. If I ever write for a show I would want to work with these writers on a show like this.

Before anything else let me start off gloating that I started calling Nancy as Lucy and Ryan’s daughter back around episode 9 or 10 and I am so fucking vindicated right now, I have been riding an otherwise unattainable high nonstop for the past three days. @kat--writes is this how you feel when you accurately predict things??? Because it feels AMAZING.

For the rest of the episode first can I just say how horribly tragic Lucy Sable is? Kudos to the writers because it was a stunning plot twist that I never saw coming but for some reason it’s almost worse than a murder to me? If for no other reason than how it has affected and will continue to affect everyone around her. Ryan who is now going to be even more guilt ridden about not getting to the ice cream parlor on time, Karen and Josh trying to avenge a murder that never even happened, Tiffany Hudson who died for nothing, Nancy who will be forever wondering if her mother slipped and fell or if she really did kill herself right after Nancy was born because if anything will give you an abandonment complex it’s that.

And hearing Carson say what happened that night with Lucy (PHENOMENAL acting by the way, maybe best scene of the season so far) makes rewatching the earlier episodes, especially 7/8 where Nancy was accusing Carson of murdering Lucy so much more tragic. This girl who he and his wife clearly cared for and felt sympathy for, begging him with her last words to take care of her daughter, knowing he looked away for less than two seconds and probably spending weeks if not months if not years questioning if he’d just looked up a half a second sooner if maybe Lucy would still be alive. Seeing Lucy’s daughter, his daughter, accuse him of murdering Lucy had to be a gut punch and it gives his character so much more depth. I just hope this doesn't put too much of a strain on his relationship with Nancy because they have finally gotten to such a good place and as far as Carson is concerned Nancy is his daughter, and he wasn’t trying to lie to her about Lucy. All he was trying to do was respect Lucy’s dying wish and protect her from the Hudsons. I mean he was willing to go to prison for murder before admitting what happened on the bluffs that night, that should count for something.

Moving away from the Shakespearean levels of tragedy for a moment.

God I fucking KNEW Owen was shady I have known it since the beginning. Granted I do not have absolute confirmation yet BUT: him being in his car outside the Claw when he said he would be out of town, holding a piece of Lucy Sable’s skull? (As far as the skull goes though, loved that bit of Bess/George/Nick teamwork to casually hide it from the cops.) Creepy bastard, thy name is Owen. I have no idea how it will play out yet but I hope to God that it will. But also that is going to be a bit of a blow to Bess, finding out her cousin is whatever he is, and also Nancy who literally just had sex with him.

Speaking of.

Much as it pains me to admit, the writers are clearly taking several steps away from Nancy x Nick for the moment, probably to give Nick x George a fighting chance. Side question. Why is Nick sleeping on a couch when he has over four and a half million dollars? Like he could afford to build a house with that much money. But I digress. I think it will be good for George to have a love interest who is A her own age and B not married, especially someone who she already had a good friendship with. Maybe since Owen is a Confirmed Shady Motherfucker the writers will either keep Nancy single for awhile or pair her up with Ace because their chemistry is off the charts. And as long as we’re on the romance topic, Bess. BESS. My sweet queer daughter. Where are Lisbeth and Amaya? Last time we saw Lisbeth they admitted they were kind of falling in love and slept with each other, last (and first) time we saw Amaya I fell in love and she and Bess had more chemistry than a high school sophomore. GIVE ME MY ON SCREEN BESS ROMANCE DRAMA WRITERS. And am I the only one who finds it a little bit weird that Bess is apparently so good at other people’s relationships when she has never really had one before?

I’m going to take a quick minute to be sad about Nancy x Nick so if you don’t like that you can skip this paragraph. NED NICKERSON. How the FUCK can you be so totally fine with Nancy sleeping with Owen when you two are clearly soulmates and you never liked him anyway? After the inevitable Owen betrayal possibly one of two things will happen with Nancy. She will regress and start to push people (read: love interests) even further away than before, OR she will finally really start to open up to Nick and they will find their way back to each other. Admittedly the second one is unlikely since Nick and George literally just got together but you never know. Just as long as Nick doesn’t cheat on George with Nancy because those two are finally friends and are really good friends to boot, and also George deserves way better especially post Ryan Hudson affair debacle. Maybe she and Nancy can bond over having shady not good for them older boyfriends.

On the topic of Ryan being Nancy’s biological dad every time George complains about Nancy asking favors I want her response to be “you had sex with my dad” every time.

Now we will talk about the promo for the as of now untitled next episode and also what the rest of the season and possibly season 2 have planned.

In episode 17 Ryan will clearly be Going Through Some Stuff, and will also find out that Lucy was pregnant. Whether he realizes she had the baby or thinks it died with her remains to be determined, but that shot of Nancy with a busted lip and her hair cut off in a car being driven by Ryan makes me think maybe he snaps and kidnaps her? It’s a bit of a stretch but it would certainly be interesting. I think we’re also going to see more of the Aglaeca coming after Nancy for not paying the toll, because for a minute we can see Nancy sort of choking and putting her hand to her throat like she’s about to throw up again. Maybe it’s going to keep coming after Nancy until they finally let the Aglaeca have Owen, or maybe its going to try to kill Nancy as punishment for saving Owen. I don’t know but I can’t wait to find out.

For the rest of the season/next season there are a couple threads not related to Ryan finding out Nancy is his daughter. There’s the new detective but I’m not talking about him. Joshua Dude, Lucy’s brother. He is still out and about wherever he is, and does not know his sister killed herself. This will probably not exonerate Ryan in his mind as Ryan’s family is part of what drove Lucy to suicide. Maybe he will come back and decide to sort of take revenge on A the Hudsons or B the town of Horseshoe Bay as revenge for what they did to Lucy. (Sort of like the Black Hood from Riverdale but you know, well done.) There is also Everett Hudson. Last time I checked he had just been arrested for sinking the Bonny Scot and racketeering and insurance fraud and stuff, what the hell is he doing at a yacht club? I can only assume he got out on bail so maybe we will see Nancy (possibly together with Ryan) work to put him behind bars for good. Maybe Carson Drew will finally leverage some of that dirty laundry he has on the Hudsons, or better yet that Grecian urn thing Ryan has will finally be put to good use. And then in the future although there is zero proof of this I still want A for George to become clairvoyant/psychic like her mother and B for George and Bess to be cousins. I don’t think I’m asking for too much here.

Finally, because of how much of a staple character he is in the books I refuse to accept that Chief McGinnis is gone for good. My very being rebels against it. But before you scream at me about how different the show is from the books (those two or three of you who have read the books anyway) even if he were an original character I would want him to stay. He is a fantastic character, he was just starting to get depth, I adore his relationship with Ace and on top of everything else he’s good Native American representation.

I ALSO WANT VICTORIA TO COME BACK. I HAVE NOT SEEN HER SINCE 2019. WTF WRITERS. YOU CAN’T JUST MAKE ME FALL IN LOVE WITH A DYSFUNCTIONAL PSYCHIC ALCOHOLIC MOTHER LIKE THAT AND THEN ONLY PUT HER IN TWO EPISODES.

Dead Lucy should also continue to stick around, maybe she can teach Nancy how to hang from ceilings or they can bond over how much Everett Hudson Sucks. It’s just that Lucy spent all this time trying to show Nancy that she is her biological mother, and for her to move on after sticking around for 20 years right after Nancy learns the truth? It would be too - and I fully recognize I have used this word too many times but I am going to use it again - tragic.

The wait for April 8 is going to be an agony unlike any other but at least after it comes back there will only be six episodes left, and so it is very unlikely the show will go on another hiatus before the season is up. Let me know what you guys think will happen in season 2/the rest of season 1.

#Nancy Drew #Nancy Drew cw #George Fan #Bess Marvin #Lucy Sable #Dead Lucy #Ned Nickerson #the haunting of Nancy Drew #Ryan Hudson #Carson Drew #Nick x Nancy #Nick x George #Nancy x Owen #sorta Nancy x Ace #if you squint

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troybeecham · 4 years ago

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Fr. Troy Beecham

Sermon, 2 Christmas 2021

Matthew 2:13-15,19-23

“After the wise men had left, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, "Get up, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there until I tell you; for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him." Then Joseph got up, took the child and his mother by night, and went to Egypt, and remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet, "Out of Egypt I have called my son."

When Herod died, an angel of the Lord suddenly appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt and said, "Get up, take the child and his mother, and go to the land of Israel, for those who were seeking the child's life are dead." Then Joseph got up, took the child and his mother, and went to the land of Israel. But when he heard that Archelaus was ruling over Judea in place of his father Herod, he was afraid to go there. And after being warned in a dream, he went away to the district of Galilee. There he made his home in a town called Nazareth, so that what had been spoken through the prophets might be fulfilled, "He will be called a Nazorean."”

The Christmas story is mostly focused on Mary saying “yes” to God and the resulting incarnation and birth of the Son of God, Jesus. But what about Joseph? He does not appear much in the Gospels, and so we know very little about him. Much of what we think we know is based upon speculation and later traditions. In one of the few places where Joseph appears in the Gospels, this morning’s reading places Joseph at the center of the action.

Joseph, at least in the Western Church, has often been presented as a middle-aged widower who chose to marry Mary even though she was found to be pregnant before their marriage. He is presented as middle-aged primarily because of the Roman Catholic dogma that Mary was perpetually a virgin; i.e., the “brothers and sisters” of Jesus must have been his step-siblings, the children of Joseph from a previous marriage. I understand the logical necessities of the Roman Catholic dogmas about Mary, but the Scriptures do not place any such logical requirements upon Joseph and Mary. It is within the realm of possibility that Joseph was indeed a widower who accepted Mary as his wife even though she was pregnant. Given how cultures that arrange marriages decide on matches, it is most probable that Joseph and Mary where roughly of the same age. Arranged marriages have more to do with the larger familial clans, and how they mutually enrich each other, than with the bride and groom. Most marriages in the ancient world, and even still in many cultures today, were made between very young people, typically in the 12-13-year-old range. This was the age of becoming an adult. If one of the betrothed dies before the marriage, then the family has to search for an acceptable substitute. The same is true if the bride is found to be pregnant before the marriage. Finding a new husband for a pregnant 13-year-old girl in an honor culture would have been extremely difficult; impossible, even. The shame of such a pregnancy would most likely have ended in the girl being rejected by her family, or even stoned to death. Mary’s ‘yes’ to God did not deliver her from such shame and danger, making her ‘yes’ all the more astonishing. What often goes unobserved is that for Jesus to have been born, and to survive to adulthood, also depended on Joseph saying ‘yes’ to God. His ‘yes’ meant that he would have to bear a lifetime of shame. But when the angel visited him to encourage him to take Mary as his wife, and that her son was the Son of God, Joseph, just like Mary, trusted God.

Sit with this for a little while, and contemplate upon it. The salvation of the world depending on the ‘yes’ of two teenagers (here it is clear that I tend to believe that Joseph was a young boy, and that the ‘brothers and sisters’ of Jesus were his natural siblings), both knowing full well that their lives would be perpetually marked by shame. What deep faith these filled these two young people, what astonishing trust in God!

Today’s Gospel reading fast forwards us to the birth of Jesus, the arrival of the magi, and the psychotic, murderous rage of Herod the Great who tried to kill the infant Jesus by slaughtering all the children of Bethlehem under the age of 2 years. On the night before the soldiers of Herod arrive, perhaps even at the same moment that Herod orders the death of all the children, the angel of the Lord appears again to Joseph and tells him to take Mary and Jesus at once, and to flee to Egypt, and to remain there until the Lord tells them that it is safe to return home.

Sit with this also for another little while, and contemplate upon it. These two young teenagers, with a newborn, who have already begun to learn what it means to live with perpetual shame, are now having to flee in the middle of the night, terrified, and becoming refugees in a foreign land. I can scarcely imagine how people that we would consider to be adults today could so immediately set out in the middle of the night, with deadly violence right behind them, and an uncertain future ahead of them. But this is exactly with Joseph and Mary do. For a second time, they both decide to completely entrust themselves to God, the total abandonment of the self in faith, with no guarantees except the words of the angel to encourage them and trust in God to guide and protect them.

Think of all the decisions, the risks they would have to make over the next few years. Think of these two children, with a baby, going to another country, not knowing the language, having no connections or family to help them. Think of the dangers that travel of such a great distance through a desert presented them. That they survived the journey (which was the mirror image of the journey of Jacob and his sons going to Egypt during a time of famine so long before) is itself a miracle. That they managed to survive in a foreign land without becoming slaves is a miracle. Perhaps this is the reason for the gifts of the magi, gifts that would have made their survival much more secure, and why Mary and Joseph are not portrayed as rich people when they return.

And then the angel of the Lord appears again to Joseph, who tells him that Herod has died and that they should now return to Israel. What a relief that must have been for them. Refugees no longer, they could return to their families and their own culture. And so, Joseph, Mary, and the child Jesus set out to return home (the mirror image of the return of the Israelites to the Promised Land). But instead of going back to the family and kin of Joseph in Judea, because of fear of the son of Herod who was now king, they go the Nazareth, where the family of Mary lived. Back to a life of shame, of being shunned, of living with whispers…of having their child called a bastard. We do not really think much about the daily realities of their lives, the result of their having faithfully said ‘yes’ to God, and what it must have been like for Jesus as a child hearing those whispers and experiencing the shame of his parents. It must have been a lonely, isolated life for them.

Herein lies one of the great mysteries of faith: trusting God and living by faith does not mean that we will have no problems. Faith may indeed have much to do with overcoming the world, but it does not mean that the world is changed…it means that we are changed so that the conditions of the world, the conditions of our lives, do not take away our faith in God. This is, of course, the opposite of how faith is often presented. In our cultural context, we have had decades of TV preachers equating faith with financial prosperity and the lack of any unfavorable circumstance of life. Such false teachers are numerous, like fleas on a wild dog, parasites who feed upon others by manipulating them according to their desires. But that is not the Gospel. It never has been the Gospel, and never shall be. The mystery of faith requires all of us to live by hope in God, no matter the circumstances, and to trust that God shall make all things new when heaven and earth are made one.

Faith is no easy thing, especially if we live in circumstances that are hard: if we live with illness, mental or physical; if we face persecution or death because of the Faith; if we have to become refugees because of the Faith. Joseph and Mary, and the infant Jesus: Son of God, Savior of the World; they faced all of these things, and lived with them for their whole lives. And still they lived by faith, full of hope in God, trusting that God indeed is working out his will until the coming of that great day when heaven and earth are made one, when all have been raised to the new live of the resurrection, when all evil is destroyed and God wipes away the tears from every eye.

My prayer for each of us is that we contemplate the faith of Joseph and Mary, and of Jesus our Savior, and that we ask God to give us such faith that we can live in the world and overcome it just as they did. May God give each of us the grace to live by faith.

O God, who wonderfully created, and yet more wonderfully restored, the dignity of human nature: Grant that we may share the divine life of him who humbled himself to share our humanity, your Son Jesus Christ; who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, forever and ever. Amen.

#father troy beecham #christianity #troy beecham episcopal #jesus #father troy beecham episcopal #saints #god #salvation #peace #Christmas #Faith

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angela1-blog-blog · 5 years ago

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Taking it one day at a time

I’ve always been one of those Christians that goes through these cycles of going to church every Sunday and being involved to completely disappearing for a couple of months. I always thought I was too sinful to go to church. Like it disqualified me from being allowed into church even though no one ever said that to me. I started my journey with Jesus at 17 years old and I had a clean slate. As I got older that changed and because I judged myself and disliked myself for the decisions I made, I thought God felt the same. I couldn’t go to his house of worship, how could I? A hypocrite could not possibly be welcome there. As time went on I projected those insecurities towards my fellow churchgoers and felt as if I didn’t belong. When that happened I would disappear for a while and hope they’d forget the person I use to be and take me as the new person I was now. A person who was really trying not to sin.

In reality, they had no idea about any of the things I had done. If they ever had suspicions they never let it show either. The truth is they loved me as my brothers and sisters in Christ. They saw me and always had good things to say to me and invited me to events with an open heart. I was the one pushing them away. I was the one putting myself out of place because I loved them too and I had allot of residual abandonment issues from my childhood. Although all of that was wrong for me to do, the worst was letting how I felt about people keep me from God. I was so caught up in the wrong things that I never opened up the bible and read it for myself until about a year and a half ago. The small church I had attended in the past was closed down and everyone went their separate ways. I was the only member of the church who attended without any family members and so felt lost and alone once again. I still wanted to know about God but I was much more wary of who I would listen to up on a pulpit. I waked away with church hurt of my own making. I didn’t want to try going to any new churches, I felt sure I would only meet the same kind of people and go through the same thing all over again.

One day someone shared a video of Elevation Church and it appeared on my Facebook feed. I watched it for a few minutes and then I went ahead and connected my phone to my living room television. I was taken in. I had never heard anyone preach like that. He was honest, he kept it real, he was funny and most importantly, the Holy Spirit told me he was telling everyone some truth. Later on I came to find out it was Lead Pastor Michael Todd from Transformation Church in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He had only been a guest preacher at Elevation Church. And don’t get me wrong, I really like Pastor Steven Furtick too. He also hands out God’s word like Oprah does prizes but Pastor Mike’s style generally suits me better for some reason. Anyway, I entered another cycle. After watching quite a few videos of Pastor Mike and Transformation church I stopped. If I’m being honest it’s because God had gotten me another job. I felt like I should take my blessing and walk away before God realized that I was still a sinner.

Fast forward to ten months later. My grandmother, who I had taken care of my siblings and I since our mother had passed away 14 years prior, was diagnosed with cancer a third time. They didn’t know exactly where it was but they said we can assume it’s in her brain or her lungs by her symptoms. We didn’t know what to make of it. She had beat it twice before and it should have been the third time a few years back but god heard our prayers and made it disappear. Unfortunately, it did not seem we would see that kind of miracle this time. The doctors didn’t really have any answers for us and uncertainty over where it was seemed to be the most pressing issue. They scheduled her for a PET scan a month later. A PET scanner is such a rare and in demand piece of equipment they could not get her an appointment any earlier.

We tried to go on about our lives. My younger sister was graduating from law school in a little less than a week. I was set to graduate from community college a few weeks later. We have wonderful pictures of my grandmother at my sisters graduation but we weren’t able to get any of hers at mine. She watched me go up on stage and get my degree and shortly after felt too ill to stay in such a confined space any longer. She and my younger brother left to his car. Sometime between the end of my graduation and when I got home after having dinner with a couple of family friends she had collapsed and needed to be taken to the hospital.

My brother and sister had gone with her, I would stay home with my youngest brother and trade places with my siblings the next morning so they could get some rest. And that’s how we spent the next 20 days. We took turns staying at the hospital with her day and night giving each other just enough of a break to go to work or get a few hours of sleep in our beds before going to work. None of us complained, we knew it could be the very last thing we ever did for her. And it was. However, in those 20 days we experienced mercy and grace like we had never known. At some point when she went into the hospital there was too much water in her brain and it kept her from being conscious. We thought we would never hear her voice again and see her eyes open. We lived in that fear. I remember wishing I could have God hold my hand and let me now everything would be okay. I am blessed with my best friend who told me to pray.

And pray I did. I prayed, knowing I had to let God do His will and so I asked that He would please just let us talk to her one last time. See her eyes look at us and remember who we are. That I could hold her hand one more time and feel it squeeze mine. I wasn’t asking God to let me keep her, I had the feeling it was her time. All I asked was that he please let us tell her goodbye. After everything was said and done I found out my siblings had done the same, even my brother who had said he didn’t believe in God, had prayed for the same. That’s exactly what God gave us. The surgery to place a drain in her skull had gone well and she regained consciousness. When she did it felt like a miracle, a small one we knew had to be cherished while we had it. During the week she recovered at the nursing home she was discharged to recover we continued taking shifts to stay with her. My grandmother was never alone. We shared more laughs with her, looked into her eyes more often, held her hand for longer, sang with her, gave her any food she wanted, we did everything we could because we knew her recovery was a result of God’s mercy towards our family even if it did not last for long. On day 10 she went back to the hospital with a horrible headache. Everyone called off of work again and met my younger sister and grandmother at the hospital. This was it. The doctors hadn’t outright said it but they didn’t give us too much hope either, it wouldn’t have been fair. She was gone three days later.

We were lucky. We could let her go knowing she was going with God. Through that experience, though I still mourn my grandmother, I know how real God is. He showered us with his mercy, to let us really be with her for a little while longer. I was proud that my faith had grown enough to let God be God even if it hurt. Most importantly, I learned I had a wonderful father who heard me and loved me and postponed his plans to show me His mercy is real. I will never forget that and as many times as people let me tell this story I will tell it because it glorified Him and his work.

Now it is nearly a year later and the church hurt hasn’t entirely gone away. With the stay-at-home orders going on right now though it doesn’t seem to matter much. I went through multiple hobbies before I decided to watch another Transformation church video. I thought it would be one and I’d be done. One turned into two and two into three and I got to the point where I’m watching one most nights of the week. I’m falling in love with God and His word and I can’t really keep it to myself anymore. I still make mistakes but because I know God, I know they do not disqualify me from getting his love. He won’t look at me and then look away in disapproval. God loves me. So much so that He sent His one and only son to the cross just for me. I will continue to delve deeper into the word of God and prayer and try to keep myself from sinning. I still slip up here and there and I have to remember that God has already forgiven me and it is not a reason to run away and hope I’m avoiding angering Him. I will continue to take it one day at a time as a Christian woman in progress and hope that what I write will ring a bell in someone and let them know that God loves them too. He doesn’t expect us to be perfect, Jesus already paid the price for our sins, all we have to do now is go to Him with open arms and accept the gift He has already given us with each and every single one of us in mind.

#Godisgood #Mercy #Godislove #Christianinprogress #Letskeepithonest

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bloodofrobertsmith · 4 years ago

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The Virgin Mary

I was first inspired to write this biography by an issue of LIFE magazine that was completely about Mary. As I was reading I realized that despite being raised in a Christian household, as well as being surrounded by Serbian Orthodox and Catholic families for most of my young life-- the only thing I truly knew of Mary was that she was the virgin mother of Jesus. It’s important for me to note that although my family was full of devout Christians, I had spent all of my life rejecting it as a non-believer. I still stick to this thought process today.

I had learned later in my first semester of college of the symbolism and religious rites that surround her, but I still did not know anything of the Historical life around her. Was she real? What kind of life did she live? And who really was she? I wanted to know the truth vs myth of who Mary was.

“The young Jewish girl goes to the stone synagogue in Nazareth. She offers devotions in the small women’s section adjacent to the main prayer hall. In chorus with the other congregants, the girl recites Psalms and absorbs their lessons: ‘Abandon yourself to God.’

One extraordinary day she is visited by an angel who asks if she’ll play a part in the birth of God’s son. She answers yes. Perhaps a little more than 2,000 years ago, she makes her way with her husband Joseph, a carpenter, to a village called Bethlehem. Perhaps Bethlehem; some scholars posit Nazareth as more likely. In a stable, for the inn was filled, Mary and Joseph celebrate the birth of a son. They lay the infant in a feeding stall and name him Yeshua -- in Greek: Jesus. she raises Jesus to be a strong, brave young man. A leader of other men. That is the story of Miriam of Nazareth. And that is all we really know,”

But how did we get to this story? If as stated by Jarslov Peikan, we could copy on an eight by eleven sheet everything there is about Mary in the New Testament. Then why is Mary so popular through the ages? I think Mary is the perfect and most original examples of what happens when an idea evolves and grows from its original source.

Miriam of Nazareth: Miriam was born in a small village in Galilee. Known as Mary to the masses, her real name would have been Miriam or Maryamme-- one of the most common names of the day. As a young Jewish woman living in Palestine, she was a second class citizen. Not knowing how to read or write, she worked alongside her mother since she could walk. Basically, she was a poor woman and modern depictions of her are usually able to recognize that, But, the catholic church had a huge role in presenting us with images of a fair-skinned woman robed in blue silk. When she was a Mediterranean woman of low class who would have most definitely worn a simple wool or linen tunics and a shawl over her head.

The political environment of Mary’s life was a complicated one with constant Jewish oppression in the form of Roman legions. The end of the dictatorship of Herod the Great had made way for the Romans to storm into Galilee and squash Jewish revolts. Which I think is a perfect breeding ground for Jewish prophecy of a savior to form in. Josephus, a Jewish writer records that many cities were burned and people murdered by the Romans

Mary and Joseph: So, where does Joseph come into the life of Mary? The popular image of Mary we have come to know is that of a young woman in her early twenties birthing the savior. But, if we think realistically of the time period, she was probably only 12 or 13 years of age when betrothed to Joseph. Who would have been much older than she. However, Mary became pregnant before her marriage to Joseph. Let’s see how the Bible addresses this:

(NCV) Luke 1:26-38:

“God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a town in Galilee, to a virgin. She was engaged to marry a man named Joseph from the family of David. Her name was Mary. the angel came to her and said, ‘Greetings The Lord has blessed you and is with you.’ But Mary was very startled by what the angel said and wondered what this greeting might mean. The angel said to her ‘Don’t be afraid Mary; God has shown you his grace. Listen! You will become pregnant and give birth to a son, and you name him Jesus. He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of King David, his ancestor. He will rule over the people of Jacob forever, and his kingdom will never end.’ Mary said to the angel, ‘how will this happen since I am a virgin?’ The angel said to Mary, ‘The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will cover you. For this reason the baby will be Holy and will be the Son of God.’ Mary said, ‘ I am the servant of the Lord. Let this happen to me as you say.’ And the angel went away.”

For the millions of Christians, Catholics, and sub-sets of these practices, the Immaculate Conception is proven fact based on the actual fact the Bible records it as such. The apparently divine conceptions of Jesus Christ, is a miracle -- a simple and unquestionable matter of Faith. But the gospels tell us very little about Mary and the pregnancy itself. Nor does it cover the societal reaction of Mary exposing to her village, let alone her husband. When Joseph had found put, he would have most definitely thought of her as unfaithful. We do know that when Joseph found out, he had the idea to divorce her quietly, as not to expose her to shame and death from the village elders. But the Bible does state that an angel appeared to Joseph and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, Because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to name his Jesus, because he will save people from their sins.

Since most scholars today consider most of the Bible to be legend and mythology, it could be theorized that Mary, a young girl of no younger than 12 but no older than 16 had been raped by a stranger or Joseph himself. I believe it could be Joseph because I don’t know why he would have motivation to cover up another man’s rape child as the birth of the savior. I theorize essentially, that Mary and Joseph had premarital sex and Mary was impregnated. I will not determine that Joseph actually raped her as there was no such thing as statutory rape back then and they were already betrothed. I know that does not exclude it. But, given the context of the time, That is my estimate. No one will ever know what actually happened probably besides Mary herself.

But was the immaculate conception truly just a couples cover up? Maybe. We probably won't ever really know. I cannot prove or deny what is fundamentally the foundation of 2 major religions and its sub-branches. But, I as someone who believes in nothing, have a hard time thinking that this was simply a Hebrew God formulating the redemption of Man. However, the New Testament, and I suppose history; say that Joseph was a kind man, and did not give away Mary to the Elders or have her stoned for “adultery.” As far as how and exactly when the conception happened, that will continue to remain between Mary and Joseph... Or maybe Mary and herself. Even then, practically impossibly, it could be true that Mary gave birth to the Jewish Messiah.

Mary the Idea: It’s important to address the immaculate conception and life of Mary as the ultimate catalyst for what she would become. So how did Mary become the exalted Saint and Mother of All ideal to the populace?

When taking a look at Mary’s fame, it is not terribly difficult to see her evolution as the Virgin Mother of the Messiah to the Virgin Mother of all the Christian World. Though it is important to know that she is more popularly worshiped by catholic sects, Christianity also celebrated her above any other biblical figure, Save God/Jesus himself.

“Not everyone needs a brother or sister or savior, or accepts that a savior has arrived historically, or will do so one day. But everyone once had a mother.” Basically, even with all the majesty of the universe going on and changing around you, we all need a mother. Even though she is not the only saint to patron mothers, children, motherhood, and orphans-- she is regarded as the Mother of Mothers and Jesus/God is the King of Kings, Having a mother (with special circumstances aside) is the one most universal experiences of life. We all have one and we all want to love them and be loved in return. And Mary is clearly the finest and most ideal example of a mother in all of history. She is the mother of Jesus, How could she herself not be equally perfect?

But as we know, Mary as a mother is not really explored in the Bible. Basically through the centuries, as Christianity spread through European missionaries and expanded as an idea/religion, Mary expanded as well. If Christianity were not so against “false idols” I think she would be a Christian god in her own right. She was also a huge inspiration to poor people as an impoverished second class citizen becoming the “Queen of Heaven.”

Millions of people today and throughout history have turned to Mary for help, fortune, and love. She is the most named after woman in history and the most prayed to saint in all of Catholicism. Mary was a girl whose choices and circumstances made her into the most famous woman ever. Not all to her own credit as I hardly assume she could have predicted this, The spread of Christianity through colonialism was probably the biggest amplification of her life and story. Allowing her to become Mary, Mother of All.

#mary #the virgin mary #catholiscism #history #christianity #religion #jesus christ #the bible #catholic #christian #immaculate conception

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dailyaudiobible · 4 years ago

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05/27/2020 DAB Transcript

2 Samuel 12:1-31, John 16:1-33, Psalms 119:65-80, Proverbs 16:4-5

Today is the 27th day of May, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible I am Brian it's great to be here with you today, center of the week, hump day, right? So, it's good…it's good to get to the hump of the week and over the hump of the week and…and just continue to move forward, step-by-step, day by day. And now we’re kind of nearing the end of the 5th month so we see that it's the rhythm, it's…it's the rhythm that carries us forward. It's the rhythm, step-by-step day by day little by little that God keeps speaking things into our lives. Slowly over time they accumulate inside of us and they transform us. And, so, it's good to know that we’re moving forward. And we are. And it’s good to be here with you today as we take this next step forward. So, we've been certainly aware of where we are in the Old Testament. The kingdom is established. Kings have come to Israel and we’re learning about King David who has done something just unspeakable really. He’s had an adulterous affair with another man's wife and then this other man's wife who is supremely loyal to the king, he's had this man killed in battle. Same kind of stuff Saul was trying to do to him he did to Uriah the Hittite. And he's taken Bathsheba, his wife, to be his own wife. Such a strange turn of events. Second Samuel chapter 12 today. And we’re reading from the English Standard Version this week.

Commentary:

Okay. So, in the book of second Samuel Nathan the prophet confronts…confronts King David about the affair with Bathsheba. And on so many levels…on so many levels, you know, this story is such a sideways thing. We've followed the story of David. We watched him from the time he was a shepherd to the time that he killed Goliath and became this international hero to the time that he was on the run, running for his life from Saul. We watched Saul send him into battle numerous times hoping he'd get killed. And we watched him become the king of Israel. So, now he's firmly the king of Israel, a person who knows what it's like to depend on God to stay alive the next day. And he sent his army off to battle and their off battling and he's back in the palace when he sees Bathsheba. And there’s like…we don't have the back story here at all…but what we could say is that once he summoned her, like she didn’t have a choice after that. Like she's gonna go see the king. And, so, yeah, the king takes her and then he tries to cover up that this has happened by bringing Uriah back from battle and trying to give him a furlough basically and let him catch his breath and go home to his wife and be with his wife and then hopefully this pregnancy will be covered up. But Uriah is loyal to the King and the kingdom. He won't even go home. Like he won't have the comforts of home while his brothers are in tents and on the ground and in battle. And this Uriah, we’ll see his name again. I mean he's died in battle but when we get to kind of lists of all the important people that were around the king we will find that Uriah the Hittite was one of the elite warriors of Israel, one of the most loyal people to the king. And the king had him killed because he had an affair with his wife and got her pregnant. So, yeah, when Nathan comes and tells this story about a rich man taking the lamb of poor person and that was all he had, he was describing David and David knew it. The interesting thing…and we’re not finished with this story by any means…I mean…what we’re gonna find out is that this is kind of the beginning of the disintegration of David's family. Like, his family is gonna begin to lose respect here. But then we look forward and through it all we see that another son was born to David and Bathsheba after he has taken her to be his wife. And after the child of the affair that has…has passed away there's another son with a very, very famous name, somebody that we’re gonna get to know, Solomon. So, even here at this point in the story when things are really, really messed up we get clues that God continues to work through our stories no matter how messed up we make them. As soon as we stop the destruction, throw our hands up in surrender, accept where we are and repent, which is to change our minds and move in another direction, so we turn around and we start walking in a different direction. Yeah, it may take some time. We’re gonna see that takes some time for David. And some things never get right for David after this, but God brings through this David and Bathsheba the wisest person ever known, legendary until today, keeper of the Proverbs that we read primarily. But where we sit now in this story, it...it’sremarkable how far David has moved from the time that he was a shepherd and the time that he was on the run to the time that we’re in now where he is having one of his most loyal men killed to cover up an affair that he had with his wife.

We get into the book of John today and Jesus is talking about truth and the spirit of truth and a helper that he's going to send and he’s talking to his friends and he says these interesting things. “I tell you the truth, it's to your advantage that I go away.” So, if you are them you probably…like it wouldn't seem like that is an advantage. If you are following this Rabbi, this master, who you are increasingly believing is sent from God and then increasingly believing is the son of the living God and He’s telling you these strange things are going to happen that are gonna separate you and He's going to go away and that's actually going to be an advantage, that probably wouldn't seem that way. But he’s telling them, “if I don't go away then the helper won't come to you, but if I…if I go then I will send the helper or the spirit of truth.” As Jesus says, “when the spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all the truth. He won’t speak on His own authority but whatever He hears He will speak He’ll declare the things that are to come.” So, we understand this is Jesus describing that He will be sending the Holy Spirit to us to lead and guide us on this earth after He ascends to the Father. So, He’s saying He's going to go back to the Father so He won't be seen anymore walking around as an individual but will send His Spirit back upon the earth and back upon His followers so that He's not this individual that's external to us, but rather we look inward because He is within us wherever we go. So it’s not like we need to look around to find Jesus anymore like the disciples had to do at times when Jesus was off praying and there looking around for him because the crowds have come and they’re like, “everybody's looking for you.” Now what Jesus is revealing is, “you will never be separated from me.” Paul says it's the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead that dwells within us. So, what Jesus is saying to his friends may be confusing. Like, “I’m gonna go away. I’m gonna be separated from you physically.” So, they could be like, “that's a bad idea.” But what He's ultimately saying is, “everybody can become aware that you are never separated from me, ever.” And what good news that is. And man, what would that change if we believed it was true like all of the time? Like if we went through a 24-hour period aware that I cannot be separated from the Spirit of truth, from the helper, from the Holy Spirit, from the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead. I can't be separated because that's Spirit is within me. Yeahow! If we can get what we believe through our heads into our hearts and begin to live into these truths it could and should have profound impacts on the way that we live our lives. The idea of abandonment for example, how could we be abandoned? The Spirit is within us whereever we go.

Prayer:

Jesus, we thank You for sending the helper, for sending the Spirit of truth. And Holy Spirit we ask…like right from Jesus lips that You would guide us into all the truth because You will not speak on Your own authority but whatever You here You will speak and You will declare the things that are to come and You will glorify Jesus by taking what is his and declaring it to us. This is what we see in the Scriptures. This is what informs what we believe. We believe this. And, so, we open ourselves, we will welcome an awareness that You are within and around us and leading us and comforting us and helping us and leading us into all truth if we will simply listen to You. It's the same as the fact that we come to a crossroads and wisdom, the Spirit of wisdom is there speaking to us, “this is the way You should go” if we would slow down. And, so, we realize this becomes so much about being aware and awake to what's going on. So, awaken us. Let us become more aware of Your presence we ask in the name of Jesus. Amen.

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And that's it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Hello everybody it’s Susan from Canada calling and I’m not sure how to explain this, but I moved back to Winnipeg to help my son who has stage IV cancer and it’s been over two years now that I’ve been here and he’s doing well at the moment and…but he’s not…he’s not getting a whole lot more energetic because of the lung damage that the cancer has caused plus the surgery that he needed. And he’s 41. And he just sits in his chair all day and it’s so heartbreaking to see. I don’t know if I’m getting tired of this or my heart is just so broken. But pray that somehow, someway he can get a life back. It’s a…it’s a broken mother’s heart that’s asking for prayer. And I know you will be faithful. Sometimes I just don’t even know how to pray for my boy. Love you all. Bye.

This is Mike from Redding California I just want to give you all an update on my son Ben who ran away last week. Praise God he’s home today. We are so grateful and thankful today for all your prayers and God bless you all. In Jesus’ name.

Hi everybody my name is Valerie I am a Summer’s daughter in Ohio. I’ve been listening to the prayers that you guys have been sending in and I appreciate my mom for sending in the request. I would love to say that I have had a revolution and realization and know God so well now but unfortunately, I am not to that point yet. I have been finding myself praying more often and when I do pray it does lift something off of my chest and I’m taking that as a sign from God. Trying to be more aware of things that could be a sign from God that I was just ignoring before. I’m happy to say at this time I’m not suicidal. I know that my daughter needs me, I know that my unborn child needs me, which is a boy that I found out. And I’ve been through a lot, but people have been through worse and you guys and my family and God are helping me realize that. And, yeah, I didn’t know…really know what to say on this but I wanted to give an update. Thank you for all your prayers. Please keep them coming and hopefully I will be able to report back that I’m best friends with God soon. Thank you, guys.

This is for the caller Zephaniah. This is Desperately Seeking after God. I’ve been on the podcast for a few years now. I think I’ve called in one time. But Zephaniah, you actually struck my heart when you called. I just wanted to let you know, first of all, welcome you to the family and to let you know that God loves you. He answered your prayer, I don’t you know what you’re prayer was and what your situation was, but God loves you even if you had not heard his voice or the situation you had prayed about had not turned around but thank God it did. He still loves you. And as far as being religious, the only religious thing you want to do is constantly seek after God. And we just welcome you, we thank you. I pray God’s richest blessing upon you and your life and that you will continue to listen to the Daily Audio Bible.

Hey, my wonderful DAB family this is Kingdom Seeker Daniel from Chicago and happy Memorial Day to one and all. I pray you are having a great time of rest and relaxation and reflection and remembering the lives of those that were given for our freedoms in our nation but even more so the life of the One who gave His life for our eternal freedom. So, thanks be to God for His Son Jesus Christ. As I was listening today I heard Zephaniah, 23-year-old Zephaniah, call in and Zephaniah if you’re listening just want to let you know my wife and I, Lady of Victory, we have six young adult children that we are steadily praying for, standing in the gap for, that the Lord would do a work in their lives. And, so, our hearts go out for young adults such as yourself. And I want to encourage you with something. I looked your name up because, of course, you know your name has great significance being a Bible name. Your name, if you don’t already know, means the Lord has concealed, the Lord has protected, and treasured by God. So, you my dear as a new believer, I want you to know God has concealed you within Himself and He’s protecting you and you are His treasure. So, don’t you be discouraged or worried to think that you’re…you’re…you’re missing it and you’re not measuring up. Listen, all has sinned and come short of the glory of God. So, therefore none of us have it all together, have it all mapped out. You keep pressing. You keep calling in and stay connected. And get connected to China on the DABC side. All right sis. Love you. Praying for you.

Hi this is Micah in awe in Kansas City. Today I heard a call from a lady she said she was 23. It sounded like Zephaniah something niah and you’re a new believer, you started praying last summer and God has been revealing Himself to you and you were talking about how you knew of God but no you know God and that you want to like be super focused on Him and you want to do it right. And that’s really encouraging to me. It sounds a lot like whenever God got my attention and the change that I made in my life was His help. And just hang in there. Keep on…keep on walking in His way. Like He’s gonna show you the things He wants you to change and the direction He has for you. I heard this verse recently and I just want to share with you. It’s John 5:24 it says, “truly, truly I say to you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He does not come into judgment but has passed from death to life.” That’s Jesus straight up. That’s for everybody that believes, right? Like you have passed from death to life, you have a place in heaven. That’s that sweet salvation that we all believe in as Christians. Nobody can take that salvation. And if God is for you, who can be against you. All these tests that you’re about to come into, all of us still are being tested every day. You can keep that with you. You’ve got a place in heaven and welcome to our family. Not like I’ve been here long. I’ve only been here since last July but we’re all a family and it’s good to have you in the family. Love y’all talk to you later.

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goodlucktai · 6 years ago

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the wonderful mess that we made

the raven cycle pairing: sarchengsey word count: 2230 read on ao3

"I think I'm having a panic attack,” Henry says cheerfully, by way of hello.

Blue stands back to let him into her apartment, mentally writing off her homework for the evening as a lost cause.

Her roommates are in the living room, ostentatiously pretending not to stare, and Henry doesn’t give them the customary friendly wave. He doesn’t even seem to notice their attention at all, which is so much out of character for him that Blue thinks something might actually be wrong.

“Oh,” Henry says before she can get a word in, deducing something from her lack of reaction, “I guess you haven’t checked the group chat recently.”

Jesus Christ.

“I’ve been working. What have they done now?”

“Your husband is trying to drive me to an early grave.”

“Why is he only my husband when he’s doing something wrong?”

Blue leads Henry to the tiny kitchen while they banter. He perches on a stool like a long-legged bird and props his elbows up on the counter, a familiar fixture against the yellow walls and dull blue tiles. It’s late, but there’s fresh coffee in the pot because Blue is a college student, and she fills two mugs while searching her pocket for her phone.

She sewed the pocket into this skirt herself so it takes some digging. Henry refrains from teasing her so loudly he might as well have not bothered.

The muted group chat is as busy and ridiculous as it always is. Even without living in each other’s pockets the way they used to, Blue and her boys fill each other’s days one way or another. Gansey is spending the week at the Barns (even though Henry grumbled about his bed being too big with him gone, and how was he supposed to sleep alone for a whole week, and why doesn’t their girlfriend like him enough to stay over even though the commute to her job would be an extra hour from there, and they’re both the worst and Henry deserves better) and Blue expected some level of extra shenanigans from that end.

But the innocuous video message draws her eye. Below it is Henry’s “????” followed by “hey what the fuck???” and “no what the FUCK fellas?????”

Blue takes a steadying breath. She presses play.

The video cuts in abruptly, auto-focusing as it zooms in. The wind is dull white noise against the camera on all sides, and Blue realizes that this is being recorded from somewhere very high off the ground.

Ronan is laughing, that loud gut laugh that Blue associates with fires and speeding tickets. Behind the camera, Adam’s voice cusses softly, and then yells, “Don’t fucking drop him, Ronan! This is so stupid!”

“Fuck you!” Ronan yells back happily. “We’re investigating!”

Finally he comes into view. Gansey is with him. They’re most certainly not at the Barns-- or at least not any part of it that Blue recognizes. They’re halfway up some ancient wooden structure, and Gansey is leaning out as far as he can with a journal in hand. He’s taking notes, despite the wind biting at his hair and pulling at his tacky fruit-print jacket, as calmly as a TA behind a desk in any one of Blue’s classes.

Blue stands in her little kitchen with a forgotten mug of coffee in her hand and stares at the video of her boyfriend suspended sixty feet above the ground by nothing but a halfhearted elbow looped around a rail and his brother’s hands on his belt.

Strained and disbelieving, Adam’s voice barely carries over the wind; “We drove all the way to Tippecanoe because someone on Twitter saw ghost lights in the state park. You know how many @s he gets a day about this stuff? A lot. You know how much I’ve learned about the history of Indiana in the last two hours? A lot. You know how pissed I’ll be if my boyfriend and my best friend break their fucking necks from falling off a fire tower? A lot!”

This last part is shouted in the direction of said boyfriend and best friend, who don’t react beyond shooting Adam the bird and a careless wave, respectively. Ronan’s relaxed grip on Gansey and Gansey’s relaxed grip on the rail causes Gansey to slip a few inches, Ronan to scramble, and Adam to drop his phone with a colorful curse. The video ends there.

Henry takes a very calm sip of coffee. Blue says, at length, “What the fuck?”

“My thoughts exactly! I’m considering a divorce!”

“You’re not married,” one of Blue’s roommates pipes up from the couch. “So a divorce should be easy.”

“As it has been explained to me on numerous occasions, time is a circle.” Henry draws a helpful loop in the air with his finger, to illustrate his point. He doesn’t glance her way or even seem to care that what he’s saying sounds insane. “We’re not married yet, but we will be eventually, so we sort of already are. Hence, the impending divorce.”

Half of Blue wants to smile, but the other half is still horrified.

“They were supposed to be in Virginia,” she says. “They drove nine hours just to look for ghost lights.”

“Alleged ghost lights. I’ll bet you a hundred bucks it was just campers with flashlights fucking around.”

“Ronan, I expect this from. But Adam?”

“See if we ever let him babysit again.”

“Have you talked to Gansey? Aside from your keyboard mashes in the group chat, I mean.”

“Nope! I wasn’t sure if I was overreacting or not, so I came here first to get your opinion. From the look on your face, though, you’re on my side? We’re going to gang up on our beautiful idiot life partner, and you won’t let me cave in when he looks sad at me?”

Blue leans over the counter to kiss him. He tastes like vanilla caramel from his coffee, smells like ozone from the overcast weather outside and citrus from Gansey’s shampoo, and leans into her with a sigh that betrays how disquieted he actually is under his shiny veneer.

“It’s just,” Henry says, as though he knows he's stupid for it but he can’t help but care this much, “what if he fell?”

A speaking look at Blue's roommates drives them out of the living room, and they close the bedroom door behind them to give Henry and Blue the polite illusion of privacy. Blue taps Gansey's name and puts the outgoing call on speaker. Henry is gazing down at the display on the phone screen, an ugly selfie of the three of them in which Gansey manages to look lovely despite his crooked glasses and rumpled shirt and wild hair.

He picks up on the fifth ring, sounding breathless.

"Jane!" he says, the voice of someone who has no idea he's in trouble. The words are shaped like a smile, and despite herself, something tight in Blue's chest goes soft. "How's the paper going?"

"The paper has been put on hold," Blue says primly. "Because our boyfriend came over to my apartment in distress. Because our boyfriend decided to spend his evening dangling off of a fire tower hunting for ghosts."

"Why ghost-hunting, Dickie?" Henry has to ask at that point. "I mean-- you know ghosts are real. You were roommates with a ghost. You were a ghost, one memorable St Mark's Eve. So-- what proof are you looking for, exactly?"

"Proof for everyone else. Noah isn't evidence, he's family, I'm not going to use him. And I was perfectly safe, besides. Ronan was holding onto my belt."

On one hand, there are few places Gansey is safer than with Ronan. On the other, sixty-some feet is a long way to the ground, and not even the Greywaren can bring the laws of gravity to heel in the real world. Blue massages her temple, in preparation for the headache she's sure this conversation is going to give her.

"I know that you've got all sorts of climbing and spelunking gear that you've used in all corners of the world, I know you do. So why is it I never see you in a helmet when you're doing something spectacularly stupid?"

"What's the worst that could happen?" Gansey says, interested. "I've already died twice. That's once more than I'm supposed to, isn't it?"

And that...

That sounds suspiciously like someone else.

Death left a hole in him that Cabeswater had to fill, and sometimes it spills over the edges like an overflowing cup.

Henry's hand curls around his mug, a little too tight, and Blue takes a slow breath in.

She doesn't say Give Gansey back. I'm talking to Gansey, not to you, but she wants to. Cabeswater gave them a miracle when it gave them back Gansey's life, but his friends don't want to share him. These moments of-- spilling, of overlap, are few and far between, but they're unsettling even in their scarcity.

"The absolute worst?" she says with playful severity. "A divorce. Henry's going to take half of what you own, and probably keep the townhouse too."

"Oh," Gansey says, and sounds like himself again. "Is he upset? I'm sorry, I didn't-- I wasn't thinking. It's just-- the view was too good to pass up, you know? From that height, in the dark, the forest canopy looked like a sea. You should have seen it," he adds. "It wasn't magic, but it came close. I wish you had been there with me."

"Ugh, you're impossible," Henry grumbles. He's probably annoyed that he's too fond of Gansey to stay annoyed. "Take me on your stupid road trip next time."

"But you said you were busy-- "

"And tell Ronan that I will personally, and with extreme prejudice, kick his ass if he lets you pull some shit like that again," Blue adds, raising her voice, because she's ninety percent certain Ronan and Adam are within earshot of the call.

"Bring it, nerd," Ronan says, instantly proving her point. There's a muffled thud, and a soft cuss, and Adam's voice hissing at him to 'shut up, Lynch, we're already in deep shit.'

"At the very least, you could wear a helmet," Henry says. "A helmet is the very least you could do."

"I, um-- could keep one in the trunk? If that would make you feel better?"

It's probably the best they're going to get out of him. There's no way he'll stop climbing abandoned fire towers or investigating the things his odd internet circles send him, and Blue wouldn't even ask it of him. He's going to school because he has to, majoring in historical archaeology to absolutely no one's surprise, but it's clear that his heart lies in his own research, his own travels, his own agenda. He's going to discover everything, Blue thinks. Every wonderful and magical thing the world has to offer, and he'll do it with or without a fancy degree, he's done it already, and he'll do it with them by his side every step of the way if he can.

And of course he can. Blue wants him safe, but she doesn't want him stifled.

"Thank you," Blue allows magnanimously. "Are you still at the state park?"

"No, we're somewhere on I-65. The Pig died on our way back to the Barns. Adam is working his magic under the hood as we speak. We're trying to convince Ronan to dream up a conveniently located auto shop for us, but so far no dice."

The video still bothers her a little-- especially that little slip and near-fall near the end-- but Gansey is so very much alive, as steady and constant as the earth. He's far away for right now, but if she closes her eyes she can convince herself he's right there, his voice filling her small kitchen while his brothers bicker distantly somewhere behind him. Henry rests his chin on his folded arms, and Blue strokes a hand through his hair absently. They lean over the phone from opposite sides of the counter for a moment, heavy with love, aching with it, endless with it; much more than a moment should be able to hold.

"It's late where you are, isn't it? Now that you've scolded me, you should probably get some sleep."

"When are you coming home?" Henry asks. "All joking aside, it's weird without you here."

Gansey's voice is smiling again when he says, "Soon."

They say their goodnights, and Blue takes Henry by the hand and pulls him to the second bedroom. Her boys don't usually sleep over here, because the walls are thin and her roommates are nosy, but they've been here often enough that Henry can maneuver through the mess on the floor without turning on the light, and Blue follows him down onto the bed without bothering to undress. His arms slip around her and she buries her nose in the hollow of his neck.

"Still getting a divorce?" she murmurs.

"I guess I'll save that trump card for when I really need it," Henry sighs. "Our marriage is safe for now."

"It's a circle," Blue reminds him. "If you were gonna get divorced, we'd be divorced already."

"Well, shit." Henry pulls her a little closer. Two out of three is better than one, and Gansey will be home this time tomorrow. "Guess we're permanent."

#the raven cycle #blue sargent #henry cheng #richard gansey #sarchengsey #trc #my writing #trc fic

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ibuproffie · 5 years ago

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wtf WAS this season of got

i just finished watching and like...? i have so many questions? cut for spoilers i guess

ding dong you are WRONG i’m just going to incoherently ramble because i was like ??? for the whole thing. fyi i’ve read the asoiaf books multiple times so that’s kind of informed a lot of this rant because i just don’t see grrm ending the series like the show ended.

so since s7, we’ve really seen this whole rush of stuff and the process of dany taking back westeros has been really dialed up to 11 for no goddamn reason. i mean the leaders of dorne were murdered, edmure tully was irrelevant, the tyrells were just all killed off, stannis gang killed off, no mention of varys’s fake targ plan (which personally i was cool with; i don’t love that tbh). which is...part of the thing that makes got...good was the intrigue; the mass of characters and subplots and ambitions etc. and i didn’t rlly say anything because i thought ok, it’s not great but at least we’ll get a really satisfying s8.

the white walkers? sis WHERE? were they?? WHO were they?? the whole show they’ve been hyped up as the big bad, the catalyst for bringing ice and fire together, so to speak, and then they kill all of them off in one episode? isn’t this the greater evil that the people of westeros must unite behind that they’ve been foreshadowing all FUCKING show?? don’t they put things in perspective?? show the futility of life and the importance of humanity?? like what the hell? (side note: arya killing the night king was cool af but...narrative, but also...WOMEN so i’m torn) and then, i thought, “well maybe they were killed to have more time for intrigue but like...anyone who hasn’t firmly chosen a side is fucking dead” so lol to that my dudes

the dothraki? weren’t they all killed in the fight with the night king? how did they all show up to besiege kings’ landing at just the right moment? how many dothraki are there? i could ask roughly the same question about the unsullied but the dothraki were more egregious so imma just call them out

danaerys?? ma’am what?? fyi Evil Targ Dany isn’t a dany i would totally hate; the books have foreshadowed that dany has some potential for being a bad guy or at least a worse guy than she was at the beginning. anyone who says there’s no way dany could be a hot steaming yikes hasn’t been paying attention and that’s just the tea...she’s been told her entire life that she’s special because of who her parents were, she’s been extremely popular and successful just by using brute force and not listening, really, to her advisors. it’s always been there; she’s always been a little bit of a gamble. however, what i do have some problems with was that evil dany was just dropped out of fucking nowhere. like, they killed missandei and she just inexplicably torched the city, killed people who were surrendering (which if you remember, the only reason she killed the tarlys was because they WOULDN’T surrender so wtf dany) and started seeing traitors everywhere. if you’re gonna have a character start doing an about-face like that, you’re going to need to foreshadow it a little bit. because it just seemed rlly out of character. this season, all of danaerys’s decisions, which have usually been framed as “brutal but necessary” by the story suddenly became “extremely irrational and a threat to everyone”. for chrissakes, she should be fucking worried about jon eclipsing her in popularity because he has a better claim to the throne and is a man even though she’s done all the work!! it makes sense for her to kill varys because he was trying to murder her (like so many other characters tried!!) legitimizing gendry makes sense-hell, stannis tried to do the same for jon!! these were not totally out-there calls for dany and didn’t really count as evidence of her growing insanity or whatever. in addition, her goal shifted from “i want to reclaim my birthright” to “i want to create a utopia over which i rule indefinitely” which is not a desire that i have ever read from either show!dany or book!dany. she’s simply not naive enough to think she could do something like that. also (and this is kind of a pattern w s8) dany’s arc seemed to suggest that she was trying to be better than her family. the whole crux of her claim is that she’s better than aerys was, that she was learning that the family members she idealized her whole life could be terrible and cruel and that she didn’t want to be like viserys or aerys or even, really, like rhaegar. how many times have we heard this?? to just drop the whole “you-can’t-escape-your-nature” shit on us now is not only really fucking bleak, but bad writing. also jonerys just kept on getting worse and worse; the romanticization of incest on this show was too fucking much and i just couldn’t. why would danaerys, who was trying to escape her nature, desperately want to hook up with her nephew?isn’t there enough of this on got for god’s sake? what happened to her being a new targaryen? what fucking happened?

jon? i don’t love r + l =j but whatever, fine. may i ask what the point was, ma’am?? may i fucking ask, why bring back jon snow from the dead? wasn’t he the “prince that was promised”? then why in god’s name did he not take a more active role in the fight against the white walkers? if he’s azor azhai reborn, was danaerys his nissa nissa? and what did that sacrifice accomplish in his arc? or is melisandre full of shit all along and it’s just all up to chance? and then what was the point of setting all of that up? you can’t just abandon subplots like this guys; you just can’t.

bran? had no point, the worst character objectively... WHAT tomfoolery gave tyrion the bright idea to make him the king? isn’t he supposed to be smart good god

braime? excuse me what? FUCKING FORESHADOWED ALL THE GODDAMN WAY THROUGH, WE GET A TENDER A** FUCKING SEX SCENE THAT ISN’T GODDAMN GROSS AND THEN they’re like “nope sike!! see!! jaime can never change!! you thot that was a redemption arc sweaty!! twincest for the win!!” like this isn’t happening in the books and you can’t fucking change my mind, grrm did not set up this arc to disrespect jaime or brienne like this. part of brienne’s arc is going to be realizing that she is desirable and deserving of love. mark my fucking words. this was part ii of this weird “we can’t escape our nature” shit that kept cropping up this season for no reason. and look, i’m not just going off on this because i’m a hardcore braime shipper (sorry not sorry). i’m going off because it literally doesn’t make sense. if you foreshadow a huge character arc that will redeem the character, tease it, and then go in the complete opposite direction, that motivation for the character goes all over the place. at this point in the narrative he had cut his ties w cersei; he realized as tyrion pointed out that they had a toxic relationship and that while he still cared about her to an extent, he had come to the realization of what an intensely horrendous person she was, and it didn’t fucking matter if she was pregnant with his kid because she (unlike him) wasn’t making any sort of strides to be a better person. and then there’s brienne who is possibly the only soul in westeros who believes there’s more “good jaime” than “killing kings and crippling little boys jaime” who is his physical equal as well as his legit friend (like how many friends does jaime really have right) who he’s beginning to have feelings for because of their shared traumatic experiences and similar goals and the writers just...fucking ignored all of that previous buildup. and braime never had to necessarily end happily (see the cersei paragraph); i personally think that one or both of them are going to die in the books, but it really was a gigantic slap in the face as well as to book canon “throw this in the fire” anyone??

and cersei? don’t get me wrong; i’ve wanted her dead for so long but come the fuck on and remember the goddamn valonqar prophecy. that’s ignoring a huge part of her motivation for being so “evil”. because she knows her doom is coming and is doing her best to prevent it. jesus fucking christ. jaime was supposed to kill her (and maybe die in the process but ya know) because i personally think tyrion’s done enough kinslaying. to have her die in that way was both anti-climactic and ignoring the narrative again. they just shouldn’t have included the prophecy if they were going to butcher it like this jajkjfalk

#ari.txt #got #i'm upset y'all

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updcbc · 6 years ago

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September 16, 2018 - “Delivering the Final Reforms” Nehemiah 13:1-31

Click KEEP READING to read the full sermon.

Introduction

As a covenant people of God, we ought to be men and women of honor who keep our word. We mean when we say “Yes.” And we mean when we say “No.” “Anything beyond this,” says Jesus Christ our Lord, “comes from the evil one” (Matt. 5:37). Jesus declared this truth in his Sermon on the Mount primarily addressed to the Hebrew people whose ancestors had made an oath in the name of the LORD their God. He reminded the Israelites, “Do not break your oath, but keep the oaths you have made to the Lord” (v. 33). And he gave them a clear command that they should be cautious not to swear at all either by the heaven above or by the earth below—or by the city of Jerusalem. All what Jesus required for the people was to honor their word. This instruction is for all of us.

Jesus made a serious teaching. Anything beyond “Yes” or “No” comes from the evil one. Satan does not have one word for he can appear as an angel of light but in reality he is the father of lies. This is in great contrast of the nature of God who is absolutely true and trustworthy.

“God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?” (Num. 23:19)

Every Hebrew man and woman needs to treasure this divine revelation. This was the word of the LORD given to the prophet Balaam who had been hired by King Balak of the Moabites to bring curse upon Israel. At first, Balaam stood his word for God. Unfortunately, he changed his position in favor of the king because of a sumptuous bribe.

The Hebrew nation needs to understand one solid truth. Why is it that despite their stubbornness and rebellion they stand to this very day as the covenant people of God? Listen to the word of the wise: “There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the LORD” (Prov. 21:30). No human opinion and deceitful scheme could ever unsettle and destroy the Word of God. The LORD God of Israel is true to his word and trustworthy to his promise. And this is the same standard of truthfulness that God demands for every Jew and Gentile.

Unfortunately, in our fallen nature we are inclined to play with our word and break our promise. We make fool of ourselves when we say one thing and do the contrary. When we believe what is true yet deceitfully live in sin, take heed of this apostolic warning, “They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him” (Titus 1:16a).

To say “Yes” or “No” is to make a moral stand. We make a deliberate choice for what is true or false and dwell in light or darkness. There is no middle ground. If we do not keep our word to make a decisive stand, we yield ourselves under the domain of the evil one. Should we repay the grace and goodness of the LORD with ingratitude and disobedience? Sad to say, Israel did not keep his covenant with God. And they pierced their hearts with misery and grief. Likewise, if we are careless in honoring our word, we do much damage and disgrace to our souls.

Israel was back to square one. When Nehemiah the governor of Judah returned to King Artaxerxes in Persia, Israel had fallen back to their former lifestyles and broke their covenant with God. They desecrated the holy temple (13:1-9). They neglected the house of God (13:10-14). They violated the Sabbath (13:15-22). And they committed unholy marriages (13:23-30). Nehemiah went back to Judah and instituted reforms.

Let us be careful not to condemn the Israelites. If we do, we, likewise, condemn ourselves. When we say, “Yes,” do we really mean it? And when we say, “No,” do we truly stand for it? We ask ourselves, “Where is the honor in keeping our word?” Our principled walls are breaking down and our moral values deteriorating before our very eyes. The virtue we need to redeem in our church and homeland is the sanctity of our word. In light of the moral Law of God written in the human conscience, we must learn as a people to say, “Yes” and “No.” “Yes” to what is righteous. “No” to what is evil. And there is no crossroad where the two can meet. The masterpiece of the evil one is compromise.

A. The Desecration of the Temple (13:1-9)

Israel defiled the temple. With the insidious permission of a Jewish priest, a sacred room in the holy temple became a secular storage room of an Ammonite. This evil thing happened when Nehemiah was back in Persia. Upon his return in Jerusalem, he consecrated the temple.

1. The Exclusion from Jewish Assembly

In the Law of Moses, Israel must safeguard their holy assembly.

“On that day the Book of Moses was read aloud in the hearing of the people and there it was found written that no Ammonite or Moabite should ever be admitted into the assembly of God, because they had not met the Israelites with food and water but had hired Balaam to call a curse down on them. (Our God, however, turned the curse into a blessing.) When the people heard this law, they excluded from Israel all who were of foreign descent.” (13:1-3)

In Deuteronomy 23:3-6, the Ammonites and Moabites were forbidden from Jewish assembly because of their animosity against Israel.

2. The Wickedness of Eliashib

A wicked thing was committed in Jerusalem.

“Before this, Eliashib the priest had been put in charge of the storerooms of the house of our God. He was closely associated with Tobiah, and he had provided him with a large room formerly used to store the grain offerings and incense and temple articles, and also the tithes of grain, new wine and oil prescribed for the Levites, singers and gatekeepers, as well as the contributions for the priests.” (13:4-5)

Eliashib was not an ordinary priest. He was the high priest of Israel in Judah (13:8). Yet he was closely associated with Tobiah who was an Ammonite (2:10) and one of the primary enemies of the Jews (4:3; 6:12). The close association between the two was a result of the intermarriage between their families (13:8). What favor did Eliashib give to Tobiah? He reserved for Tobiah a large room in the temple exclusively used as storeroom for the Jews for temple worship. Eliashib committed this sacrilege in the absence of Nehemiah.

“But while all this was going on, I was not in Jerusalem, for in the thirty-second year of Artaxerxes king of Babylon I had returned to the king. Some time later I asked his permission and came back to Jerusalem. Here I learned about the evil thing Eliashib had done in providing Tobiah a room in the courts of the house of God.” (13:6-7)

Nehemiah came to Jerusalem on the 20th year of King Artaxerxes of Persia (2:1). On the 32nd year of the king, Nehemiah returned to the city of Susa (13:6). Within his twelve years of governor of Judah, the fear of God was restored among the Jewish people. When Nehemiah went back to Persia, Eliashib the high priest made an unholy alliance with Tobiah and desecrated the holy temple of God. Eliashib could have thought that Nehemiah would never come back to Jerusalem and he dared to abuse his religious authority and power for personal advantage. The wicked deed of Eliashib was an outright defiance against God and caused a moral breakdown amongst the Jews.

Nehemiah could have had stayed for several years in the city of Susa and resumed his royal task as the cupbearer of King Artaxerxes in Persia. It was during his absence in Judah that Eliashib defiled the temple. He gave Tobiah a room in the temple courts and the Ammonite was given access in joining the holy assembly of the Jews. This was the enemy of the Jews who made a laughing stock of the wall of Jerusalem and who hired Shemaiah the prophet to intimidate Nehemiah. When Nehemiah returned to Jerusalem with the permission of the king, he learned about the evil deed of Eliashib.

3. The Consecration of the Temple

Nehemiah was outraged of the evil deed of Eliashib the high priest.

“I was greatly displeased and threw all Tobiah's household goods out of the room. I gave orders to purify the rooms, and then I put back into them the equipment of the house of God, with the grain offerings and the incense.” (13:8-9)

We could imagine the pagan gods of Tobiah among all his unclean household goods to have been stored and secured inside the room in the temple courts. In righteous indignation, the governor forcibly threw all the unclean belongings of the Ammonite from the sacred room. And Nehemiah ordered the Levite priests to purify the desecrated room and restored its use for worship in the temple.

B. The House of God Neglected (13:10-14)

The evil deed of Eliashib, we could understand, had a devastating repercussion among the Jewish community. He lost his divine authority to lead his people for godly worship. The grievous sin of the high priest despised the holiness of God and corrupted the spiritual life of the people. When the holy temple was desecrated, the Hebrew people were demoralized and neglected the house of God.

1. The Levites Neglected

The Levites were directly affected.

“I also learned that the portions assigned to the Levites had not been given to them, and that all the Levites and singers responsible for the service had gone back to their own fields.” (13:10)

When the holiness of God was despised and the temple was defiled, the spiritual life of the Hebrew people collapsed. The solidarity of the Jews who build the great wall of Jerusalem in 52 days was shattered. The Jews broke their covenant and neglected the house of God. The gravity of their sin as a people was disheartening. All the Levites were forced to earn for their living and abandoned their ministries in the temple!

2. The Officials Rebuked

It appeared that the officials of the land tolerated the sin of Eliashib.

“So I rebuked the officials and asked them, ‘Why is the house of God neglected?’ Then I called them together and stationed them at their posts.” (13:11)

The leaders of the land lost their moral ground to lead the people. The spiritual deterioration in the dark days of the judges had returned and the Hebrew people did their own thing for their selfish ends. Nehemiah sternly rebuked the government officials and commanded them to redeem their authority and power as public servants to lead the people to the LORD and observe their covenant with God.

3. The Offerings Restored

The officials of the land obeyed the word of Nehemiah. Not by coercion as an authoritarian ruler. They listened to him as the governor esteemed by the people because of his godly life and exemplary leadership.

“All Judah brought the tithes of grain, new wine and oil into the storerooms. I put Shelemiah the priest, Zadok the scribe, and a Levite named Pedaiah in charge of the storerooms and made Hanan son of Zaccur, the son of Mattaniah, their assistant, because these men were considered trustworthy. They were made responsible for distributing the supplies to their brothers.” (13:12-13)

The Israelites moved as one people and observed their covenant. They yielded themselves to the LORD and gave their tithes and offerings to God. And the Levites were back to their noble task in the house of God.

4. The Pleading of Nehemiah

Nehemiah knew the hidden pain of leading his wayward people. In instituting reforms, he firmly held onto the LORD who alone could change a sinful human being and rebuild a fallen nation.

“Remember me for this, O my God, and do not blot out what I have so faithfully done for the house of my God and its services.” (13:14)

In total dependence to the LORD, prayer was the lifeblood of Nehemiah. God alone could sustain him in all his troubles and could bless all his painstaking labors. Without God, his ultimate source of strength and encouragement, all his works for his people would be in vain.

C. The Sabbath Violated (13:15-22)

The temple was desecrated. The house of God was neglected. Nehemiah, who was back in Jerusalem, also learned that the Sabbath was violated by his own people and foreigners.

1. The Jewish Men Warned

Nehemiah discovered that the Sabbath day for rest and worship was used by Jewish men for business and trade.

“In those days I saw men in Judah treading winepresses on the Sabbath and bringing in grain and loading it on donkeys, together with wine, grapes, figs and all other kinds of loads. And they were bringing all this into Jerusalem on the Sabbath. Therefore I warned them against selling food on that day.” (13:15)

In the Law of Moses, men and animals must rest on the Sabbath day. Nehemiah saw that the Hebrew men from different localities in Judah treaded in winepresses and loaded their all sorts of merchandize on donkeys and treated Jerusalem as a profitable marketplace during the Sabbath. Nehemiah warned his countrymen not to violate the Sabbath.

2. The Phoenician Men Warned

Nehemiah also warned the men from Phoenicia.

“Men from Tyre who lived in Jerusalem were bringing in fish and all kinds of merchandise and selling them in Jerusalem on the Sabbath to the people of Judah.” (13:16)

If the Jews themselves violated the Sabbath, what could be expected from the foreigners? The people from Tyre, a principal seaport of the Phoenician coast in the Mediterranean, brought with them their most celebrated product of purple dye made from mollusks found on their sea shores besides their metal works and glassware. The Sabbath became a lucrative day of business. Nehemiah rebuked the Phoenicians.

3. The Jewish Nobles Rebuked

And the Jewish officials were not spared.

“I rebuked the nobles of Judah and said to them, ‘What is this wicked thing you are doing—desecrating the Sabbath day? Didn't your forefathers do the same things, so that our God brought all this calamity upon us and upon this city? Now you are stirring up more wrath against Israel by desecrating the Sabbath.’” (3:17-18)

The officials did not only tolerate the ongoing business during the day of rest and worship. They themselves were involved and had their own share in the profiteering business during the holy Sabbath. Nehemiah rebuked them affront. They were courting a national disaster as their forefathers in desecrating the Sabbath for the love of money.

4. The Gates Closed During the Sabbath

To stop the systemic trade during the day of rest and worship for the Hebrew people, Nehemiah closed the gates in Jerusalem during the Sabbath that ultimately discouraged the traders, Jews and Gentiles alike.

“When evening shadows fell on the gates of Jerusalem before the Sabbath, I ordered the doors to be shut and not opened until the Sabbath was over. I stationed some of my own men at the gates so that no load could be brought in on the Sabbath day. Once or twice the merchants and sellers of all kinds of goods spent the night outside Jerusalem. But I warned them and said, ‘Why do you spend the night by the wall? If you do this again, I will lay hands on you.’ From that time on they no longer came on the Sabbath.” (13:19-21)

Nehemiah gave a strong warning to implement the ordinance. He made a clear directive to those who were insistent and spent the night by the wall in order to sell their products at daybreak when people would enter Jerusalem on the Sabbath. Nehemiah warned them once. Should they not listen and would come the next Sabbath, Nehemiah warned them: “I will lay hands on you.” The people knew Nehemiah meant his word. And they no longer came to do business in Jerusalem on the Sabbath.

To secure the gates of Jerusalem from importunate traders, Jews and Gentiles alike, Nehemiah committed to the LORD the Levites as gatekeepers on the Sabbath.

“Then I commanded the Levites to purify themselves and go and guard the gates in order to keep the Sabbath day holy. Remember me for this also, O my God, and show mercy to me according to your great love.” (13:22)

D. The Unholy Marriages (13:23-30)

The holy temple was desecrated. The house of God was neglected. The Sabbath was violated. Nehemiah was disheartened to learn about the unholy marriages committed by his own people. He was shocked that the family of the high priest himself was involved. The final reform that Nehemiah undertook meant the painful tearing apart of intermarriage families between the Jews and Gentiles.

1. The Intermarriages of the Jews

When Nehemiah returned to Jerusalem, he was confronted with a serious problem about forbidden intermarriages.

“Moreover, in those days I saw men of Judah who had married women from Ashdod, Ammon and Moab. Half of their children spoke the language of Ashdod or the language of one of the other peoples, and did not know how to speak the language of Judah.” (13:23-24)

The women whom the Jewish men intermarried came from idolatrous cities. Ashdod was the principal city in Canaan where the temple of Dagon was built. Dagon was the ancient chief god of the Philistines worshiped by the Canaanites long before Abraham entered Canaan. Ammon was the territory of the Ammonites who worshiped their national god Molech that involved child sacrifice. And Moab was the place of the Moabites who worshiped their national god Chemosh, like Molech, with sacrifice of children as burnt offerings.

What were the grievous effects of the intermarriage of the Jews with the pagan Gentiles? The children could not speak Hebrew the language of the Jews. The Jews who intermarried were acculturated with pagan culture and lost their identity as Hebrews. And this also meant that the Jews who intermarried embraced the idolatrous worship of the pagans.

2. The Indignation of Nehemiah

Nehemiah was outraged in righteous indignation.

“I rebuked them and called curses down on them. I beat some of the men and pulled out their hair. I made them take an oath in God's name and said: ‘You are not to give your daughters in marriage to their sons, nor are you to take their daughters in marriage for your sons or for yourselves. Was it not because of marriages like these that Solomon king of Israel sinned? Among the many nations there was no king like him. He was loved by his God, and God made him king over all Israel, but even he was led into sin by foreign women. Must we hear now that you too are doing all this terrible wickedness and are being unfaithful to our God by marrying foreign women?’” (13:25-27)

This was the height of the governor’s anger. Nehemiah rebuked the men and cursed them. He beat some of them and pulled out their hair. He compelled them to make an oath not to give in their sons and daughters to marry their pagan neighbors. And he warned them not to follow the footsteps of King Solomon who married foreign women whom she loved and embraced their idols. The downfall of the Hebrew people could be traced in their idolatrous worship. The nightmare of Israel was again encroaching at the door. And the Jews seemed not to care!

3. The Consecration of the Priests

Nehemiah lost his temper when he discovered the evil deed of Eliashib.

“One of the sons of Joiada son of Eliashib the high priest was son-in-law to Sanballat the Horonite. And I drove him away from me. ‘Remember them, O my God, because they defiled the priestly office and the covenant of the priesthood and of the Levites.’ So I purified the priests and the Levites of everything foreign, and assigned them duties, each to his own task.” (13:28-30)

Eliashib desecrated the temple in conspiring with Tobiah. He also became the father-in-law of Sanballat’s daughter. Eliashib defied God and befriended the enemies of the Jews! And he was the high priest!

What more could Nehemiah say at the height of this wickedness? He was dumbfounded. All what he did was to act right there and then. He directly approached Eliashib and drove him away from his presence! Ironically, the name of Eliashib in Hebrew meant “God restores.” He did not live up to his sacred name and holy vocation. Definitely, Eliashib was removed from his office as the high priest. And Nehemiah purified and consecrated the holy ministry of the Levite priesthood. This was the most difficult reform the governor of Judah had ever encountered.

4. Provisions for the Temple

The holy temple was desecrated. The house of God was neglected. The Sabbath observance was violated. And the covenant marriage was defiled. Nehemiah consecrated the temple. He renewed the care for the house of God. He restored rest and worship on Sabbath. And he redeemed the sacredness of the Levites and priesthood.

Given all these reforms he secured the sufficient needs of the temple: “I also made provision for contributions of wood at designated times, and for the firstfruits” (13:31a). And Nehemiah pleaded, “Remember me with favor, O my God” (13:31b). Men could forget him and devalue his work. God would not and never will.

Nehemiah ended where he began. When he heard that the wall in Jerusalem was broken down and his people were in great trouble and disgrace, he prayed and fasted for the welfare of his countrymen. After the wall was rebuilt and his people were secured, they were again in great distress and disgrace but this time because of their sinfulness. Just as he restored the wall of Jerusalem for the security of his own people, so he instituted reforms to rebuild his fallen nation. As in the beginning so it was in end, he pleaded with God for the welfare of his own people. His pleading should be the cry of our hearts: “Remember me for this, O my God, and do not blot out what I have so faithfully done.”

Conclusion

The wall of Jerusalem was restored but there was a moral breakdown of the principled walls of the Hebrew people. The temple was desecrated. The house of God was neglected. The Sabbath was violated. And they committed unholy marriages. Just as when Nehemiah first came to Jerusalem and restored the broken wall for the welfare of his people, so he came back to Jerusalem and instituted reforms to rebuild his fallen nation. What legacies can we bring home from Nehemiah’s reforms for his countrymen?

Sanctify our devotion to God. Nehemiah consecrated the temple when it was defiled. We are the living temples of God. We desecrate ourselves if we cherish any sin in our heart. We mourn how deceitful our hearts are and plead with God to cleanse us from the inside. Then we can worship the LORD in deep reverence and rest in his presence with great delight.

Nurture our solidarity in our covenant. Nehemiah confronted the people who neglected the house of God and they brought their offerings to the Levites. When we give ourselves first to the LORD, we offer our lives for one another and seek for our ultimate good. Our covenant bond is anchored upon the beauty of grace. Freely we receive. And freely we give with grateful heart.

Enrich the primacy of delightful worship. Nehemiah warned those who violated the Sabbath and restored the heart of worship on the day of rest. True worship observes the harmonious cycle of work and rest. We glorify God in the works of our hands and in the quietness of our souls.

Safeguard the sacredness of our home. Nehemiah was outraged against the Jews who intermarried with pagan Gentiles and he entrenched the sanctity of a covenant family among his people. May our beloved sons and daughters become godly men and women who will build godly homes reflecting the grace and glory of God. So we plead, “Oh, LORD, remember us with favor.”

#sermon #sermons #God #Christian #Jesus #Christ #updcbc #dcbc #church #Bible #nehemiah #worship #covenant #devotion #holiness

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dfroza · 3 years ago

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our Creator chose and entrusted the Jews with spiritual truth

which led up to the clear revelation of the Son.

this is what Paul illuminated in the New Testament (New Covenant) seen in Today’s reading of the Scriptures with the 3rd chapter of his Letter of Romans:

So what difference does it make who’s a Jew and who isn’t, who has been trained in God’s ways and who hasn’t? As it turns out, it makes a lot of difference—but not the difference so many have assumed.

First, there’s the matter of being put in charge of writing down and caring for God’s revelation, these Holy Scriptures. So, what if, in the course of doing that, some of those Jews abandoned their post? God didn’t abandon them. Do you think their faithlessness cancels out his faithfulness? Not on your life! Depend on it: God keeps his word even when the whole world is lying through its teeth. Scripture says the same:

Your words stand fast and true;

Rejection doesn’t faze you.

But if our wrongdoing only underlines and confirms God’s rightdoing, shouldn’t we be commended for helping out? Since our lies don’t even make a dent in his truth, isn’t it wrong of God to back us to the wall and hold us to our word? These questions come up. The answer to such questions is no, a most emphatic No! How else would things ever get straightened out if God didn’t do the straightening?

It’s simply perverse to say, “If my lies serve to show off God’s truth all the more gloriously, why blame me? I’m doing God a favor.” Some people are actually trying to put such words in our mouths, claiming that we go around saying, “The more evil we do, the more good God does, so let’s just do it!” That’s pure slander, as I’m sure you’ll agree.

So where does that put us? Do we Jews get a better break than the others? Not really. Basically, all of us, whether insiders or outsiders, start out in identical conditions, which is to say that we all start out as sinners. Scripture leaves no doubt about it:

There’s nobody living right, not even one,

nobody who knows the score, nobody alert for God.

They’ve all taken the wrong turn;

they’ve all wandered down blind alleys.

No one’s living right;

I can’t find a single one.

Their throats are gaping graves,

their tongues slick as mudslides.

Every word they speak is tinged with poison.

They open their mouths and pollute the air.

They race for the honor of sinner-of-the-year,

litter the land with heartbreak and ruin,

Don’t know the first thing about living with others.

They never give God the time of day.

This makes it clear, doesn’t it, that whatever is written in these Scriptures is not what God says about others but to us to whom these Scriptures were addressed in the first place! And it’s clear enough, isn’t it, that we’re sinners, every one of us, in the same sinking boat with everybody else? Our involvement with God’s revelation doesn’t put us right with God. What it does is force us to face our complicity in everyone else’s sin.

But in our time something new has been added. What Moses and the prophets witnessed to all those years has happened. The God-setting-things-right that we read about has become Jesus-setting-things-right for us. And not only for us, but for everyone who believes in him. For there is no difference between us and them in this. Since we’ve compiled this long and sorry record as sinners (both us and them) and proved that we are utterly incapable of living the glorious lives God wills for us, God did it for us. Out of sheer generosity he put us in right standing with himself. A pure gift. He got us out of the mess we’re in and restored us to where he always wanted us to be. And he did it by means of Jesus Christ.

God sacrificed Jesus on the altar of the world to clear that world of sin. Having faith in him sets us in the clear. God decided on this course of action in full view of the public—to set the world in the clear with himself through the sacrifice of Jesus, finally taking care of the sins he had so patiently endured. This is not only clear, but it’s now—this is current history! God sets things right. He also makes it possible for us to live in his rightness.

So where does that leave our proud Jewish insider claims and counterclaims? Canceled? Yes, canceled. What we’ve learned is this: God does not respond to what we do; we respond to what God does. We’ve finally figured it out. Our lives get in step with God and all others by letting him set the pace, not by proudly or anxiously trying to run the parade.

And where does that leave our proud Jewish claim of having a corner on God? Also canceled. God is the God of outsider non-Jews as well as insider Jews. How could it be otherwise since there is only one God? God sets right all who welcome his action and enter into it, both those who follow our religious system and those who have never heard of our religion.

But by shifting our focus from what we do to what God does, don’t we cancel out all our careful keeping of the rules and ways God commanded? Not at all. What happens, in fact, is that by putting that entire way of life in its proper place, we confirm it.

The Letter of Romans, Chapter 3 (The Message)

Today’s paired chapter of the Testaments is the 22nd chapter of the book (scroll) of Isaiah that points to God establishing righteousness and the humbling of arrogance:

A message about the valley of Vision:

What in the world is wrong with you?

Why have you climbed on your housetops and started celebrating?

What noise! The whole city is in an uproar.

Don’t you realize that your fallen comrades didn’t actually die fighting,

That your leaders turned tail together and ran,

only to be captured without a fight, without even drawing their weapons?

The rest of you tried to run far away

but were still captured.

This is why I said, “Just leave me alone;

let me weep bitterly over this travesty.

Don’t tell me it’s not that bad, or that everything will be all right.

We’re talking about the destruction of my cherished people!”

The Lord, the Eternal, Commander of heavenly armies,

determined that this would be the time for destruction—

Smashing and crashing, wreaking havoc and chaos in the valley of Vision,

battering down walls and crying out to the mountains.

You tried, but how could you hold off Elam’s skilled archers

with chariots and horsemen and Kir’s soldiers—shields held high.

The invader’s chariots overran your pristine valleys,

and their horsemen made their stand at the city gates.

But God simply did away with Judah’s defenses.

In that day you put your trust in weapons stored in the armory.

You began to fix the many breaks in the walls of the city of David.

You stocked up on water from the lower pool.

You took stock of the houses in Jerusalem,

and began to dismantle them stone-by-stone to shore up the city wall.

You built a reservoir between two walls to hold the water of the old pool.

But in all this you neglected the One who could really save you;

You failed to consider the One who actually made this place

and established it so long ago.

Consequently, the Lord, the Eternal, Commander of heavenly armies,

determined that day would be a time of weeping and regret,

A time of shaved heads and donning sackcloth

and a time for mourning.

Yet you missed the point and made merry,

slaughtering cattle and sheep for a giant celebration,

Eating and drinking your fill of wine!

People (to each other): Eat up, drink up, for tomorrow we die.

Eternal One (to Isaiah): This sin will not be forgiven.

It will stay with you until your dying day.

That’s what the Lord, the Eternal, Commander of heavenly armies, said.

Eternal One: Come on. Go to Shebna, the caretaker of the royal household,

and confront him saying,

“Why are you here, anyway? Do you really belong here?

What right do you have to build yourself an elegant tomb

And stone monument here out of the rock on this hill?

Look, strong man! The Eternal is about to throw you out,

wildly, violently. With a firm grasp

He will crush you like a ball—hurl you deep into a land

far, far away where you go to die.

You will be known as the shame of your master’s house

and your splendid chariots will lie empty.

I will see to it that you’re driven from your post, toppled from your position,

with all the disgrace and shame that you deserve.

When that day comes, I will summon My faithful servant;

Eliakim the son of Hilkiah will be called

To take over and assume your authority and office.

I will clothe him in your royal robes and fasten your sash securely around him.

He will be a father to the people:

He will have authority over Jerusalem and Judah.

I will grant him the key to David’s royal house and

no one can shut what he opens;

no one can open what he shuts.

I will attach him securely like a peg to that house,

and he will bring honor to his father and his family.

On him will hang all the riches,

all the honor, of his family’s future.

On the appointed day, the peg that was attached so securely to that house

will become weak, break off, and fall to the ground.

And everything that had been hung on it will fall down and shatter.

The Eternal One, Commander of heavenly armies, has declared it to be so.

The Book (Scroll) of Isaiah, Chapter 22 (The Voice)

A link to my personal reading of the Scriptures for Wednesday, june 30 of 2021 with a paired chapter from each Testament of the Bible along with Today’s Proverbs and Psalms

A post by John Parsons that looks at faith and suffering in this world:

Regarding the "language of pain," the Talmud discusses how the bleeding of a stubbed toe corrects the relationship between man and God as if it were an "olah sacrifice" (whole burnt offering). They elaborate that this is the case if it was the second time the toe was injured before recovering from its first injury, and that it had occurred on the right toe when the person was on a mission to perform a mitzvah.

The reference to the right toe recalls the anointing of the priest for service (Exod. 29:20) as well as the healing of a leper (Lev. 14:25). The sages note that this signification of the blood is not the result of a punitive measure but instead indicates a wound that brings the heart closer to God. In the case of an injury to the toe while doing a mitzvah, the sufferer is brought to teshuvah (repentance), not because of disobedience, but in order to learn compassion, and to affirm that everything comes only from the Lord (Psalm 136:25-26). "Let this suffering be for atonement," by which is meant, may this too bring my heart closer to God's love... The sages brought this case up as a counterexample to the notion that all suffering or pain is some form of punishment from heaven, and argue that on the contrary, some suffering is the result of God's decree. This is the message of the Book of Job as well.

A pain-free life is not necessarily a sign of blessing, of course, since it might indicate that the person is no longer being "educated for eternity," and therefore that God no longer talks to him anymore. This is one way to understand the irony of why the wicked prosper in this world, for they shall have received their reward here, but nothing in the world to come (Matt. 6:5; Job 27:8). On the other hand, pain can “goad” the soul to draw near to God for healing, which is the essential and consummate blessing, after all... Pain also teaches us to be humble, to consider our own frailty and need, and to learn compassion by extending that consciousness to people as well. The greatest example of this is found in our Savior, who emptied himself and suffered in wholehearted service to his heavenly Father (see Isa. 50:6; Phil. 2:7-8; Heb. 2:10, 4:15; 5:8-9. 7:25, etc.).

The focus of spirituality is not about finding comfort through fulfilling our desires as much as it is devotion to the truth by exercising faith in the divine ideal. We come to God to conform to his will, not because religion is a form of therapy or another self-improvement project. Stoicism has made a come-back in the “postmodern” world, offering people a variety of philosophical diversions meant to diminish the significance of what happens in this world and to direct the mind to a "nirvana-like" equanimity (ataraxia), as if the final reconciliation has already taken place. Such detachment from the world, however, is incompatible with faith in God's omnipotence and love, since it assumes that this age is not meaningful or offers no blessing. Genuine faith in God allows us to mourn when sorrow is called for and to rejoice in times of joy; it does not negate the reality of history nor deny God's providential love in the temporal realm. This is part of the tension we have in a “two-tiered” reality, which requires us to both affirm the reality of life in this world - the mixed bag of sorrows and joys we experience in our sojourn - and the promise of the substance to come, when all tears will be wiped from our eyes and our love will be unhindered by sin... The tension is dialectical and complex: we stand in relation to God not only when we are confronted by his truth, but in our seeking and in the ordinary ups and downs of our everyday existence. As C.S. Lewis said, those who choose a life of truth over happiness often acquire both, whereas those who seek happiness over truth often acquire neither... Therefore as we walk with God, whether in the high places or in the shadow of death, we experience blessing and grace in our lives.

The temptation behind suffering is to regard it as a sign of divine rejection or abandonment. Even when suffering is interpreted to be an invitation to do teshuvah, however, it does not unambiguously indicate where we stand in relation to God... This is true even in light of the work of salvation secured in Yeshua at the cross. Is our suffering a means of correction or "chastening" (Psalm 94; 119:71)? Or is it the result of the common affliction our fallen human nature (Gen. 3:17-19; Job 5:7; 14:1; Rom. 8:20)? Or is our suffering somehow for the sake of the glory of God (John 9:1-3, Matt. 5:11-12)? The writers of the New Testament repeatedly mention fiery trials and tests that would befall God's children (1 Pet. 4:12-13; Rom. 8:17; Phil. 3:10; Matt. 5:11-12; Col. 1:24; 2 Tim. 2:12).

Some have said that this ambiguity makes teshuvah impossible, for you can't repent unless you know what you have done wrong... This raises the question of how much we are able to know of ourselves and our "secret sins," and how these affect us spiritually. "The heart is deceitful above all things, and incurably sick-- who can know it" (Jer. 17:9). The heart is the source of the problem (Mark 7:21) and yet how is it possible to overcome itself? In other words, how can a person be saved from himself, after all? If we are incurably sick, healing must come from a source outside of ourselves... by means of the miracle of regeneration. [Hebrew for Christians]

For more on this topic see the link under this post!

Post continues here:

and another post about surrender:

If we refuse to surrender to God, we will be at war within ourselves... To be inwardly healed we have to first of all *want it; and that means being willing to give up *everything* - including our sickness of heart. For many people, this is too much, and therefore they cling to what makes them sick as a child might cling to a pacifier. This is because to the natural man, the cure is regarded as worse than the sickness itself. As Kierkegaard astutely noted, “When a man is sick or indisposed, the first thing he does is to send for a physician, and medication is what he wants; spiritually, however, it is just the opposite - when a man has sinned, the last thing he wants is the physician and medicine."

"Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed;

save me, and I shall be saved, for you are my praise."

- Jeremiah 17:14

Note that the healing mentioned in this verse is primarily spiritual (יְשׁוּעָה) rather than physical, since physical illness is a natural consequence of living in a fallen world. The Apostle wrote that while the “outer man is wasting away, the inner man is renewed day by day” (2 Cor. 4:16). There is a divinely appointed “light and momentary affliction” that we all must carry in this life, and it is callous to suggest that every believer should live miraculously immune from any physical illness or suffering whatsoever. “By His stripes we are healed” does not necessarily mean that we are guaranteed physical healing in this life, though it does mean that we are given true and everlasting healing from the plague of death, that is, we are given spiritual healing that far outweighs concern for the present moment and its temporary afflictions. Of course there are miracles of healing that come through prayer (Psalm 6:2; James 5:15; 1 Cor. 12:9), though even then the focus must first be directed to the spirit and then to the flesh...

A person of faith will use the good eye (העין הטובה) to see the good - even in occasions of misfortune, whereas one disposed to despair will use the evil eye (העין הרעה) to see the bad - even in occasions of good. And even in cases where the facts are entirely the same, for one there is hope, but for another there is fear... Therefore, a person's whole view of life is actually a confession of the state of his inner being. As Yeshua said, "according to your faith be it done unto you," which underscores the importance of believing in the good, taking hold of hope, and trusting in the ongoing love and care of the Lord, despite affliction and trouble in this world. True healing means coming out of the nightmare of fear...

People sometimes seek healing for that which needs to be slain. You don't need a cure -- you need let go and allow yourself to die.... The carnal life may indeed be scandalized, but the point of life is not how to find healing, strength, sustenance, happiness, and so on, but rather how to give up and die. Flesh and blood can never inherit the kingdom of God.

Again, God's way of healing is entirely different than man's way. Man tries to suppress the flesh, to cover it up, to justify its failings, or to enlist its power in the battle against sin, but God's way is to remove the flesh from the equation. The goal is not to make us stronger and stronger, but rather weaker and weaker, until the flesh is crucified and only the sufficiency of the Messiah remains. Then we can truly say, " I have been crucified with Messiah. It is no longer I who live, but the Messiah who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me" (Gal 2:20). The word “Hebrew” (עִבְרִי) means one who has “crossed over” (עָבַר) to the other side, as our father Abraham did (Gen. 14:13). Again, it is on the other side of the cross that we experience the very power that created the universe "out of nothing" (i.e., yesh me'ayin: יֵשׁ מֵאַיִן) and that raised Yeshua the Messiah from the dead. Ask the Lord for the miracle... [Hebrew for Christians]

6.29.21 • Facebook

Today’s message (Days of Praise) from the Institute for Creation Research

June 30, 2021

Behavior Checklist

“Do all things without murmurings and disputings: That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world.” (Philippians 2:14-15)

The Holy Spirit makes sure that we do not take lightly the obligation to live godly lives. This “list” contains both warnings and promises.

Everything is to be done without “murmurings” and “disputings.” Both words are very interesting synonyms of heart attitudes that produce ungodly behavior. The Greek word translated “murmur” is goggusmos, and it is almost an onomatopoeia (sounds like what it actually is)—a secret debate, muttering to oneself. The “dispute” (Greek dialogismos) suggests a logical debate with oneself.

We are commanded to excise that kind of behavior from ourselves so that we may well be blameless and harmless as the “sons of God,” living “without rebuke.” These words are powerful in their description of God’s expectations for us.

The blameless condition is first an eternal promise that comes with salvation: “To the end he may stablish your hearts unblameable in holiness before God” (1 Thessalonians 3:13). That condition “works out” in this life as a faultless reputation that is harmless. Paul uses the term this way: “I would have you wise unto that which is good, and simple concerning evil” (Romans 16:19).

Finally, if we eliminate “murmuring and disputings” from our inner thoughts and actively seek to be “blameless and harmless” with our external behavior, we will be “without rebuke” in the middle of this sadly sinful world. “Be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless” (2 Peter 3:14). HMM III

A tweet by illumiNations:

@IlluminationsBT: The largest Least-Reached group in the Middle East / North Africa without Scripture, Jesus film, or audio recordings are the Omani Arabs of Oman, with 2,108,000 people. #iwtkbible

6.30.21 • 12:00pm • Twitter

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