#Its something I actually wanted to do a while ago
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freezebobs · 3 days ago
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DBFZ Yamcha and Ten cookies...done!!!
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Soo I've been on a mission to recreate the Yamcha and Ten cookies from dragon ball fighterz because they're adorable...and they're finally real!! :'D process and info below! (kind of long lol)
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I saw someone share these screencaps from the game a while ago and as someone who never played DBFZ I was so charmed at how cute these things are. I wondered if anyone had ever made cookie cutters for them, did a quick search and didn't really find anything, so just kind of moved on.
A few months later I remembered them again and was like, man, I really would love to see these brought to life lol. And I searched again and actually found someone who made them!!... But they weren't selling them anymore. 😭💔
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^Reddit post from user ShadowLord898.
So in the next few days I went into the DBFZ game files, figured out how to navigate them and locate/open the proprietary file types (took...a lot of googling), and eventually found the cookie textures!!! Which I then painstakingly traced over to create vectors.
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I thought once I had the vectors, it would be easy to drop them into a 3D program and extrude them to make the cookie cutters. BOY WAS I WRONG!!! It's probably just my inexperience working with vectors in 3D programs, but I tried Blender, Fusion 360, and Tinkercad and had problems in each one before finally figuring out the right approach. (I really almost gave up 🤧 but I hadn't realized that your geometry/topology don't need to be perfect when 3D modeling for print as opposed to, like, something you plan to create a texture for.)
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Tinkercad and its extremely user friendly interface, plus SVG import functionality, saved me.
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Oh then I realized I forgot to reverse the design, which you have to do for a cookie cutter because of how they work. I thought I would need to flip all the vectors and re-import them, recreate the models... but thankfully there's a "flip" button in Tinkercad. Fixed.
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I sent the files over to my friend @.theprocrastinatingengineer on Instagram, who has a 3D printing service, and he was able to print them out for me!
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While I was waiting for them to ship I downloaded Cura ("slicer" program for preparing 3D files for print) just for fun. (I was really eager...)
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And here's when I finally got them!!!
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Despite choosing all the dimensions carefully, I was still surprised how dainty they were when I actually held them in my hand. I wasn't sure if they would work...
So I made the dough and everything, used some 5mm thick chopsticks as guides to roll out the dough to the thickness I wanted. I put plastic wrap over the dough to prevent the cutters from directly touching the dough due to food safety concerns. Here is my first attempt to use them:
After this my mindset quickly shifted from caring about food safety to "what's a little more plastic in my system?" / "I'm here for a good time, not a long time!!" / "welll the dough gets baked anyway so that kills the germs it should be fiiine" **I Do Not recommend others to be so careless... also important note: I was the only one eating these so I didn't have to worry about others' safety 🥴
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^The difference between using the cutters with and without the plastic wrap.
This first rolling out of the dough was actually a little too thick; in my design I hadn't accounted for the way the dough squishes up when you press the cutter into it. There wasn't enough vertical space at all, and the dough kept getting stuck in the cutter. It was a bad time!!! (didn't get a lot of photos of the failures here because my hands were covered in flour)
After lots of broken cookie cutouts, re-flouring the surface/cutters/rolling pin, and re-rolling the dough to be a bit thinner, I managed to get these out. I had to support Ten's head like a newborn when moving the dough onto the cookie sheet because the connection to the body was so delicate 😢
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AND HERE THEY ARE...fully baked and ready 🥹
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For the most part I was going to leave them undecorated like how they are in the game. But @.lamichicuenta made this really cute drawing of the cookies where Yamcha had chocolate decorations and Ten was a salty cracker, and I really wanted to try decorating some to resemble those!! Here are the photos of both versions of the cookies the next day once I was able to get some natural light for nicer pics.
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(I meant to poke some holes in Ten's cookie to look more like a cracker but I forgot about it until they were already baking.)
They tasted fine...yamcha was better thanks to the chocolate. 🤭
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If you read all this, thank you for following my cookie cutter journey... 😌🙏💖
Oh yeah and I made the vectors, 3D print files, and specs/info all available in a google drive folder here for anyone to use if they want! https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1hQ7uq3leYPK64pGgt3LhFw-70IZnkYzh?usp=drive_link
OH and one last thing, i ended up revising the 3D models to hopefully fix the issue of not enough vertical space. ...turns out I hit the maximum for photos and videos in this post, but you can see it on my twitter here! https://twitter.com/freezebobs/status/1875720926840680678
I didn't get to try these revised models, but they are the ones I put in the drive folder. 😊👍
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whereispearlescentmoon · 10 hours ago
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Drabble about Tango, Pearl, and redstone PPE while I try to be creative again. In which I make up facts about redstone because I love nothing more than over explaining Minecraft mechanics.
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You would think that working with redstone dust as much as Tango did would make him more lax on the rules but if anything it was the opposite. The stuff was a fine powder that both created and transported electrical signals, and was mildly corrosive on the skin. Redstoner’s Lung was something no one wanted to deal with, and it could cause permanent damage if it got in your eyes. It was his favorite thing in the world and he respected it the same way a sailor can love the sea and know to fear it. When working with any amount of redstone dust, Tango kitted himself out with goggles, a respirator, and gloves. He covered as much skin as possible, pushed the flames that constituted his hair out of the way with a headband, and wore closed toed shoes (not that he really owned much in the way of open toed). And all of this, he felt, was completely necessary.
Not everyone was as cautious as he was. Doc, for one, insisted he didn’t need goggles because of his eyes was bionic, which Tango thought was silly but Doc was too stubborn to convince. X claimed his helmet functioned as a respirator on its own, which to be fair it might. He’d never actually allowed Tango to study its mechanisms despite years of begging. And Etho said his mask did enough filtering that a real respirator wasn’t necessary, which Tango often poked him about. Impulse and Mumbo, at least, shared his same level of care.
Of course, every Hermit needed to do a bit of redstone sometimes. But when they did, they had heard Tango lecturing enough that they knew to gear up lest they face his wrath. Skizz had learned that lesson with a swift “Don’t be that guy” in his first week.
And so, Tango was confused about how this had happened. When guiding Pearl through some basic redstone, a few months ago, he had not thought to ask about whether she had PPE. He gave every Hermit a kit at the start of each season, at least to prevent himself from having to scold people about it. He had seen her using it during his tutorials.
Tango also knew Pearl had worked with redstone a little last season, and most people had seen redstoners work before, Pearl included. She had based right next to Mumbo a couple of servers ago, she had spent tons of time in Decked Out 2 and seen him do maintenance, surely she knew she was meant to be wearing protection when working with redstone dust, right?
So imagine his surprise when he met up with her for a few rounds at Hungry Hermits after she had been “busy” for a few days and noticed that her hands were stained red. A familiar bright red that seemed to glow on skin and was currently coating her fingers and speckled all the way up to her elbows and on her face. To top it all off, she kept coughing into her elbow, a cough he knew wasn’t from a cold.
“Pearl, you haven’t been working on anything recently have you?” She flushed at the question. Ever a poor liar, she stuttered through a response.
“Wha- no! Definitely not!” She began fidgeting with her hair (which he just noticed was also stained red at the ends) in a way that definitely wasn’t suspicious, “No secret projects here!”
Tango tilted his head and sent her a disapproving glare. He crossed his arms over his chest and looked pointedly at her hands.
“Uh huh, but if you were you would be wearing the PPE I gave you, right?” He felt a mix of concern and annoyance at the way she hung her head a little at the question.
“Well, I just,” Pearl was cut off by a cough that made Tango wince. It sounded like it hurt. “I get so caught up sometimes when I realize something is going to work, I just forget!”
“Pearl! That’s super dangerous! You could do real damage if you’re not careful!” All thoughts of playing Hungry Hermits were gone at this point. Did she not realize how serious this could be?
“It’s not that bad! It came off after a few days when I finished Dye-Duction, and the burns healed pretty quickly. I’m sure it’ll be fine this time too,” She sounded defensive, almost offended.
And she had spent weeks in and out of the wires for Dye-Duction, if she had been skimping on the PPE during it then he would have noticed it. Sure, she kept weird hours, but he thought he had run into her while she was working on it at least once. Right? Apparently not.
“That is so not okay, dude. You can do permanent damage if you’re not careful! And don’t think I haven’t noticed your coughing,” As if on cue, Pearl once again let out the kind of painful, throat tearing cough that came with breathing in a mildly corrosive dust. Tango had the passing thought that he should really grab her a water bottle. Her voice was raspier when she spoke next.
“I know that, it’s just that when inspiration strikes you have to chase it, yeah? And sometimes when inspiration strikes, my PPE kit happens to be put away in my farm house when I’m working on the other side of the base. So I just… didn’t wear it,”
Her eyes were shining in the way they did when she got ultra invested in something, the way he had seen her do with both Decked Out 2 and now Hungry Hermits. That made it click for him. It wasn’t that she was being reckless, just that she had probably genuinely forgotten. Pearl, he had learned in the years he’d known her, had a tendency to get obsessed with whatever she was working on. It wasn’t enough for her to casually work on a project. When she got really into something, whether it be a game or a build, she would drop everything to perfect it. Sleep, food, and even other projects tended to fall to the side. He had had to walk her back to her base himself sometimes when she ran Decked Out 2 too many times in a row. Apparently whatever this was had captured that same fervor.
He ran a hand through his hair, exasperated.
“You are so sitting through my power point. This is not okay, Pearl,”
She looked up finally and crossed her arms.
“Fine,” She agreed reluctantly, before titling her head to the side slightly and smiling at him, “but can we at least play one round of Hungry Hermits first?”
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stevie-petey · 18 hours ago
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a cutesy fluff blurb w steve and bug for all the angst coming from the season 4 rewrite😭😭 i hate to see bug and steve go through all this but your writing is just so so so incredible that i’m just completely and utterly drawn to it.
i missed steve and bug so much so heres a fluffy blurb of everyone finding out theyre finally together <3
enjoy !
"steve and i are dating."
you hold your breath, bracing for impact. steve is frozen next to you, perched on the edge of the couch as if getting ready to run at the first sign of danger.
all week the two of you have agonized over this. telling everyone that youre now together was a given. obviously it wouldnt be a secret, but telling everyone seemed simple at first. now, with dozens of eyes staring at you: its terrifying.
especially when the news is met with complete and utter silence.
mike yawns. el and max stifle giggles.
"youre all shockingly quiet right now." you finally say, hating this immensely.
robin looks up at the ceiling, suddenly finding the wheelers basement a fascinating thing. will picks at the carpet beneath him and dustin taps his leg impatiently on the ground.
lucas, bless him, has the decency to smile at you. "thats great, y/n."
"did we..." steve scratches the back of his neck. "did we, uh. miss something?"
"why the hell is everyone acting so weird?" you butt in, now really starting to wonder if you and steve did something heinous to deserve the weird silent treatment.
jonathan shifts on the floor, and your eyes narrow at him instantly. crossing your arms, you jut your chin out at him. "fess up, byers. whats going on?"
his eyes widen slightly, and nancy, who is sitting next to him holding his hand, bites back a smile. your eyes narrow even more and jonathan finally releases a laugh.
"stop glaring at everyone, bug." he looks at you fondly. "i think we're all just wondering who won."
your face scrunches in confusion. "what...?"
dustin jumps up from his seat, sick of the anticipation. "just spit it out already! did i win? for the love of god, please tell me you guys got together on july 11th. please."
nancy raises her hand. "or july 16th. id prefer that date, actually."
"what about y/n's birthday? i thought everyone agreed my date made the most sense." will speaks up, looking eagerly at you.
an offended scoff escapes your mouth when you finally realize whats going on. "that bet seriously cant still be going on."
"answer the question, y/n!" dustin wails, practically choking on the taste of victory of the $30 that went into the betting pool. "when exactly did you and steve finally seal the deal, huh?"
"what the hell is this kid talking about?" steve looks around the room, completely confused. "why does it matter when we got together?"
jonathan explains before you can. "we all placed bets on when youd get together. lucas and max were out of the running a while ago. but me, nance, dustin, and will are still in."
"i, for one, am still personally offended that i wasnt allowed to join the bet when i found out about it." robin says, looking pointedly at him. "just so you know."
"sorry," jonathan says without any real sympathy. "rules are rules."
your face burns wildly. "y'all are insane and this is such a gross invasion of privacy-"
"screw privacy! tell me when steve found a pair of balls and asked you out." dustin stumbles in front of you and steve now, panting. "i need the money!"
"dustin!"
steve places his hands on his hips. "i already had balls, thank you very much."
you elbow him. "please stop talking."
"the kid was doubting my manhood-"
"do you enjoy having my elbow in your ribs?"
mike, no longer finding this conversation amusing, stands up and claps his hands. "alright, im bored. will," he turns to him. "clearly they didnt get together on y/n's birthday. they were locked in a death lair and not even steve is dumb enough to make their anniversary that date. so youre out."
steve wants to argue with him, but admittedly he cant.
mike then turns to dustin. "it wasnt july 11th, either. considering the fact that we had funerals to attend and we all know y/n's crippling guilt complex."
"hey!"
"hes not wrong, angel."
you elbow steve again and he doubles over in pain.
then mike turns to nancy. "and it wasnt july 16th because its currently the 27th and theres no way in hell harrington would be able to keep his mouth shut for that long."
again steve really wants to argue with mike, but, unfortunately, hes right.
mike finally turns to jonathan, sighing tiredly. "which leaves us with you and your guess of july 19th. aka: the only possible date left. wow, shocker! jonathan byers correctly guessed something about y/n henderson!" he spins around, glaring at you as if this somehow all your fault. "are we done here now?"
robin, not at all whispering quietly, leans over to max. "this kid has some serious issues."
"like you wouldnt believe," the girl mumbles. "trust me."
dustin shoves mike out of the way, inadvertently causing the teen to stumble into jonathan and fall on top of his sister. "hes wrong, right? please tell me hes wrong. y/n, im your brother. we are blood."
"well, technically mike is wrong. july 19th isnt when we got together." you begin to say, raising your voice when dustin starts to cheer wildly. "it was july 20th, so mike isnt wrong about jonathan winning."
two things happen at once.
first, dustin falls to his knees in despair, screaming in agony as max and el cover their ears and glare at him.
the second thing that happens is dustin regaining his senses and then tackling jonathan, with nancy and will right behind him.
its a mess of screams and screeches as jonathan tries to defend himself, but you simply press your back against steves chest and watch the storm unfold with slight vindication.
serves the fuckers right for betting on your private life like a game of poker.
"how much money do you think our relationship ended up being worth?" steve asks you, wincing under his breath when he sees dustin pinch jonathans nose.
"better be at least $20. if be offended if its anything less than that."
he laughs, the sensation of it sending vibrations down your own body. he kisses the crown of your head. "thats my girl."
"how did you know?" dustin has jonathan pinned now. "how do you always win?"
"get off me! it was just a lucky guess-"
"that was $30 you asshole!"
you hum, pleased. "think i can convince jonathan to give me some of his cut?"
steve laughs again. "only if you give me a percentage as well."
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xxgoldie · 1 hour ago
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oh him getting possessive is SO good in this scenario. hadn't even thought of that. I headcanon him as being from a rural village / rlly small town in snezhnaya, I can't remember if that's canon supported or if its just me copy pasting where my family lives onto him in my mind, but that's the vibe I get. it's an everyone-knows-everyone town, and thats part of why he loves to visit, because even if ppl are a bit wary about him now, he is still sweet little Ajax to them. but that means they also aren't as scared of him as they are in the city. and they also all know and love you, people stopping to greet you and ask how you've been whenever they see you while the two of you are out on walks (small town means there's fuck all to do but wander around). they're gushing about how it's been so long, they haven't seen you since you visited a year ago! seriously, he had to live without you for a decade, when he definitely knew and liked you more than they did, and theyre here whining and taking your attention from him over one year? and they don't even flinch at his deadly glare as he pulls you to his side and says that you should get going.
really, though, he just wants to make up for lost time. years and years of bad timing has kept you apart but he never stopped thinking about you, saw the photos and got updates on you whenever he visited your family, and now he wants every second with you he can get, he wants to hear everything about your life. he's not even sure if the feeling is romantic or not until you tell him you're not dating anyone and he feels pure relief, and he swears he sees something similar on your face when he tells you he's single too.
when he sees you off, he feels like begging you to stay. he knows it's stupid, because he can't stay either, he'll be in town for a couple more days then he'll have to go back to the city and then get sent on another assignment to some far corner of teyvat (he hopes its your far corner, but he knows his luck is rarely that good). what he really means is he wants you to stay with him, wherever that may be, but those words don't come until after you're gone. instead, the two of you agree to stay in touch, and he makes you promise you'll let him know ages in advance when you're planning to visit snezhnaya again so he can try and be around as well. even if he has to work, you could visit him at his place in the city (he might actually prefer that - he wouldn't have to fight anyone for your attention there, and there's places he could take you out for a proper date)
thinkin abt childe since im visiting my like entire family in poland bc yknow. big family vibes n snezhnaya being slavic-based (+its been snowing like crazy here the last couple days). like, childhood friends to lovers w him where u were absolute besties as kids but then u moved away from snezhnaya and he joined the fatui and ur visits never seemed to coincide with his and suddenly its been fifteen years and you haven't seen him once. he surprises his family when he's back early from a mission and walks in to find u at his kitchen table having coffee with his mother and sister (your families are friends, of course you always visit them when you're in the country), and it should be awkward but you're honestly both so happy to see each other, it's been so long that teucer wasn't even born yet last time you saw each other! and then they bring out the old albums and you're poring over photos of the two of you at age five playing in the snow and he invites you out for a drink to catch up properly and his parents are nudging each other and not-so-quietly whispering about how they "knew those two would get married one day". idk. is that anything?
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fictitiouswanderings · 15 hours ago
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Jayvik posting part 5
Jayce could see that things were getting more difficult for Viktor, he only wished he could help. The other sat around on the couch more often at the lab massaging his aching leg and back, sighing heavily, not trying to complain but complaining in his own way. He wondered how he made the walk in the mornings from his apartment, and those damn stairs too. He was deep in thought when Viktor was snapping his fingers in front of his face. “Hey, are you in there?” Jayce shook his head a little before focusing on him. “Sorry, what were you saying?” “I was saying I was thinking of going home early. I don’t want to not be able to work, but I need to lay down, everything hurts right now” “Is it..normal pregnancy hurt? Or extra hurt? Should I be worried?” “It’s normal hurt, not yet doctor’s orders hurt” Viktor rolled his eyes a little. “If you’re going to take the rest of the day off please actually rest instead of working on something at home, I know how you are” “I intend to take a hot soak and then lay in bed Mr Talis, do you wish to supervise me?” Viktor chuckled.
Jayce flushed a little, taken aback but smiled back at him. “No, I have another project that I need to work on” “If you say so” Viktor grabbed his cane and made his way out of the lab to home, somewhat limping and waddling. 
Jayce feverishly jumped from the project he was working on to looking for apartments for him and Viktor, he decided that Viktor’s apartment was perfect for him, but much too small for a baby, and living together would have some great benefits. They could even look for a house. It wasn’t until he had at least 10 different places bookmarked that after hours of looking through place after place that he decided it was time to ask if Viktor would even consider moving in with him. He doubted the other would say no after at least considering it or not, maybe he wanted to have just himself and the baby to his small apartment. It was somewhat of a big step and he felt he should have asked months ago instead of waiting to see the other in pain like he was. 
On his way to Viktor’s apartment he passed by a florist’s shop he’d never noticed before, they were having a sale and the shop was beautifully decorated on the outside, beckoning those to come in. Jayce fell for its trap and decided to grab a bouquet of flowers from the shop, just something pretty for his lover. After leaving he continued his way to Viktor’s, finding himself clutching the flowers tightly against his chest, repeating to himself under his breath “Will you move in with me?”. Nervously he handled his set of keys and made his way into the apartment complex, he wondered if he should check Viktor’s mail or not and realized the other always did when the returned, so he decided it was probably already checked since Viktor should be resting by now. He made his way up those cursed stairs and to Viktor’s door, inserting the key and quietly opening the door. Viktor had done as promised and had taken a bath and then laid down, but was currently in the middle of making mac and cheese and cutting up hotdogs into it. He made eye contact with Jayce as he was cutting up another hot dog into the pot to mix in. “Well hello there Lover” he chuckled. 
Jayce smiled widely, “Hello! I have these for you” he gently thrust out the flowers for Viktor. “Oh! How lovely, thank you Jayce” Viktor spoke as he took the flowers from him and searched for a vase to put them in or the next best thing, a glass from the cupboard. 
“What’s the occasion? Did I forget something?” He asked. “You didn’t forget anything, I actually wanted to ask you something” “Oh? What is it Mr. Talis?” Viktor semi-mocked some seriousness playfully. 
“Would you consider moving in with me, and us finding a place together?” Viktor stopped stirring the noodles and hotdogs together. “Where is this coming from?” He, semi-evading the question while pulling the pot off the stove and eating directly from it. “Earlier when I was deep in thought, I was thinking about us, and the baby, and your apartment, and how you seem to be in far more pain lately” “Yes, and?” “And I realized this place” he gestured widely at the small room, “Might not be the best place to raise a child, and it would be nice…to live together too” Viktor just kept eating more mac and cheese as he listened to Jayce’s proposition. Jayce just stood waiting for a response, nervously rubbing his thumb and middle fingers together as a fidget response. Viktor looked the other up and down for a moment, then scooped another spoonful of mac into his mouth before nodding. “Is that a yes?” Jayce perked up in response. Viktor just nodded again before swallowing what he had. “Yes Jayce I’ll move in with you” he chuckled softly.
“Gods yes” Jayce praised, “I have some places in mind if you want to look at them” “Did you spend your afternoon working on this instead of working in the lab?” Viktor accused. “Maybe” Jayce pouted. Viktor only chuckled a little again seeing the other pout, “Show me these places” He finally surrendered the pot of mac back to the stove he’d turned off and led the other back to his bed which he comfortably cosied into. Jayce pulled out his phone and began showing Viktor the bookmarked places, nice two bedroom homes or apartments. “I noticed some of these aren’t apartments but houses….are you sure you’d want to buy a house with me Jayce?” Viktor asked, sincerely wanting to know.
“I would buy a house with you if that’s what you wanted Viktor, it could be our own little nest somewhere for the three of us” He gently raised his hand to Viktor’s stomach and rubbed him softly. Viktor sighed softly, it was nice to be touched by his partner.
“I think I’d like a house…we could modify it however we please, where an apartment, not so much. I don’t have much to offer in the way of furniture though as this place came furnished, and I haven’t really added to it. I’m sure they’ll leave me a list of things to leave behind when I move out, I’ll have to talk to the office about it”, Viktor mused. 
“Dont worry about furnishings, I’ve got that covered” Jayce spoke, kissing the other’s head softly. “Hmm, You’re so sweet on me” “Are any of these of interest to you? I tried to make sure that there was public transport in any of the places that are a little further out, if you’re willing to take a train or a bus.” “None are within walking distance of the academy?” Viktor questioned, “ I don’t mind having to walk” “I think the one’s within academy distance are all bought up for professorial housing” “Oh I suppose that would make sense…” Viktor frowned a little before continuing to scroll through the options Jayce brought to him. “Here, I like this one” he pointed out to a small home with two bedrooms that was close to a train station. Jayce looked at the listing again remembering the little home, it was all one floor with a master bedroom just a little larger than the other room. It offered a nice little kitchen open to a living room with a bathroom just off of that. “We could go and visit it if you want?” “I’m pretty satisfied just seeing it through pictures” “We should still have someone inspect it for us if not myself” Jayce responded “So responsible of you” Viktor jested. “I just want to make sure everything is safe if i’m investing my money into it” 
The two of them continued to look at listing after listing, while Jayce made note of which ones to call to see if they could come see the building.
It wasn’t long until the two of them were planning moving and it started getting late and they started to get sleepy laying in bed together already. Viktor began to doze off and Jayce just smiled and gently covered them both up in the blankets and went to sleep himself. 
The next day already they had places to see so they were up and getting ready to go on a viewing spree. 
Apartment after apartment, house after house, it wasn’t until the 8th house that they saw that they thought they may have found the perfect place. An older couple used to live there and there were already all sorts of bars for accessibility and support, there was even a bathtub you could practically stand in, made for you to sit but still taller than most tubs are.
“This is the place” Viktor turned around to look Jayce up and down, “what do you think?” “I think if you love it, then we need to put an offer in on it” “Put one in now” Viktor begged, “this place is perfect” 
Jayce chuckled a little and kissed the top of Viktor’s head, “Okay, I will put an offer in and see where it goes. Do you want to look at the last couple of places or shall we go home?” “Let’s go home, it’s getting late now” “Alright, sounds like a plan” Jayce replied before they left the last home and found a cab back to Viktor’s apartment. Once home Viktor was happy to get his leg brace off and relax back in bed. “What a day” he sighed out
“What a day indeed” Jayce agreed before he was sitting on the edge of the bed grabbing the other’s legs and massaging. “Ahh be careful, I need to keep this one stretched out a little more.” Viktor motioned to his bad leg.
“Sorry about that” Jayce replied, making sure his motions going forward were careful with the other. Treated him like he was made of porcelain. It wasn’t long after he started that he finished giving the other’s legs a massage and just laid them across his lap. He smiled down at Viktor and just took in the sight of him laying there pregnant with his child.
“What, what is it? Why are you staring again Jayce?” Viktor asked.
“ I’m not staring, I’m just admiring you”  Jayce replied.
Viktor laughed a little “you sure are a strange one” “Am I not allowed to admire you?” Jayce pried and Viktor shrugged a little. 
“I just always feel your eyes on me” Viktor finally replied. 
“I can’t help myself when I’m around you” Jayce moved Viktor’s legs so that he was laying down flat again and joined him to cuddle. “You’re just so beautiful, and I’m so lucky to have you” 
Viktor cuddled in closer to the other, a smile on his face, he was so lucky to have such a loving partner as well. 
Moving day was far more eventful for Jayce than it was for Viktor. When they had gotten notice that their bid for the house was accepted they all but partied the whole night with sparkling juice and food whipped up from what they had available. All Viktor had to do was package up his belongings which only took a couple of boxes and he was done. Jayce informed him he wasn’t allowed to carry anything and he was fine with that if he was being honest. Viktor almost felt sorrow at the idea of leaving his apartment behind, he’d gotten so lucky being able to find something so close to the academy and so accommodating that he’d fallen in love with the place somewhat. After cleaning up any messes in the apartment and straightening his pile of boxes he finally sat down and waited for Jayce to show up and help.
It wasn’t long until Jayce arrived with all smiles and excitement pouring from him. 
“Are you ready?” “Ready” Viktor nodded
Jayce paused to look around the room, he was glad the other had this apartment despite a couple of setbacks like those stairs, but he was more grateful that he was going to be moving him somewhere he didn’t have to worry about that any longer. He started picking up the boxes with ease and moving them out. It didn’t take long until the room was empty of Viktor’s things and he was leaving the room behind one last final time. He locked the door and followed Jayce down the stairs, the office was a little house connected to the apartment building, all he had to do was go outside and over to it to return keys. “Do you have the set of keys I gave you?” Viktor asked. “Yeah, let me grab them for you” Jayce replied as he set the boxes he was carrying down into a moving truck. He fondled his pockets for a moment before pulling out a set of keys and handing them over to Viktor. “Thank you darling” spoke Viktor as he made his way over to the office “I’ll be right back” 
Jayce watched from the back of the moving truck as Viktor made his way to the office and back taking maybe 10 minutes all together as he apparently had to sign some paperwork as well finalizing his moving out.
It wasn’t long until the two of them were packed up and on their way to their new home, Viktor wondered how Jayce was going to move everything in on his own as he assumed they didn’t have any extra help. “You’re really putting in the extra work aren’t you” Viktor spoke up.
“What do you mean?” Jayce replied, concentrating on getting them home safe.
“How do you intend to move all of the things in the back of this truck on your own?” “Oh that” Jayce chuckled, “I have some cousins coming to help, dont worry about it” 
“Oh” Viktor responded, he wasn’t sure what to do with that information even tho it was good. He’d never met any of Jayce’s family, not even his mother at this point and was a little nervous to meet her now. Soon enough they arrived to their new home and there were a few people already waiting, and Viktor could tell immediately they were related to Jayce. The three men standing waiting all seemed to be in good physique and had the same tanned skin that Jayce did. Viktor couldn’t help but blush a little at the sight of them all. Jayce quickly took hold of their attention and they were quickly busying themselves with boxes and furniture moving it into the home. Viktor kicked back and watched everything happen as he really wouldn’t be of any help at this point.
Less than two hours had passed and everything had been moved into the home at this point, Viktor wandered in and looked around at all the boxes that would need unpacking and wondered if they should start unpacking now or leave it to later. 
“I promised the boys food for helping” came Jayce suddenly, almost reading his mind, “Do you want to come out with us or would you rather stay here?” 
Viktor considered it for a moment before answering “I think I’ll stay behind, there’s still lots to do.
“If you’re sure, just don’t strain yourself okay?” “I’m sure, and I wont I promise” Viktor replied. Almost as quickly as they came Jayce and the boys left to go and get food leaving behind Viktor and the house. This was okay with Viktor though as he was feeling the need to lay down, he made his way to the master bedroom and was shocked to see a larger bed than he was used to. He’d been sleeping on his full size bed for so long that he didn’t consider that there might be larger beds, but a king size seemed so space inefficient. He slowly made his way over and sat on the edge before lifting up his legs and laying spread out on the bed not even able to touch both sides. He sighed softly before closing his eyes and resting.
It was almost time for Viktor to have his body back to himself, nearly 9 months had passed and he’d been on bedrest for two of those much to his arguing. He made sure that Jayce went to the lab to work and gave him space as he really wasn’t doing much other than laying about and getting a lot more sleep then he’d ever been used to, in between getting kicked in the ribs of course. Viktor anxiously spent his days waiting for signs, any little cramp was timed. Jayce also anxiously spent his days waiting for signs from the other, he’d made sure to pack a go back for him just in case he needed it. It wasn’t until late at night that Viktor, who hadn’t been able to sleep, was cramping every so often for about the same time that he became suspicious. His water hadn’t yet broken which was keeping him from waking Jayce. Quietly he made his way out of bed and over to a large exercise ball, sitting on it and catching his balance before slowly bouncing on it. Something the midwife he’d spoken to shared might be helpful. He had both his hands on his back steading himself as he bounced. It did oddly help him feel like he could get through the cramping a little easier. Jayce woke up feeling the absence of his partner and lifted his head to see the other bouncing away. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I think so, just some cramping” “Have you been timing them?” “Yes, they’re getting closer together, it might be close to time, but until my water breaks I’m just trying to ride through them..” 
“Is there anything I can do to help?” Jayce propped himself up in bed. “Actually yes, do you remember when you held my belly weight in the past for me?? That’d be fantastic right now” Viktor commented. Jayce hopped out of bed and stood behind Viktor as he stopped bouncing on the ball, he gently scooped up his belly and pulled upwards and back, steadying Viktor against his body as well as holding up some of the weight of his belly.
A loud sigh escaped Viktor’s lips, “Thank you, just like that”. He nuzzled his head back against Jayce’s pecs and closed his eyes a little bit trying to relax. 
“Of course, anything for you” Jayce replied, kissing the top of the other’s head. “I’m so anxious for this to be over,” Viktor sighed “I want my body back” “I know darling,” was all Jayce could think to say, “Soon”
Viktor stifled a groan at a particularly sharp cramp, “Can you move in small circles?” “Mmhm” Jayce did as instructed and held the other’s belly up and moved in small circles for him, granting another soft sigh of relief. Viktor slowly started to bounce on the ball again in movement with Jayce’s hold. “I think they are subsiding for now, it might be a good idea to try and sleep again” Viktor mentioned after a little while. Jayce leaned down and kissed his head again and down his neck a little. “If you’re sure” he responded. He gently helped Viktor up from the ball and back to bed where they laid together, Jayce’s hand making its way to his belly, rubbing in small circles and up and down his stretch marks. Viktor sighed in relief when he laid on his back and was massaged by the other. His massages always felt good, but this even more so. He cuddled up close to Jayce and tucked his head under his chin and tried closing his eyes to sleep. Jayce continued to hold him close and rub his belly hoping to lul him back to sleep. 
A couple hours more and the sun began to peak into their bedroom. Viktor had actually gotten a little bit of sleep but was once again woken up to being kicked by an active baby. He gently nudged Jayce and called his name to which the other woke immediately. “What is it? Is it time?” “No, not quite yet, but I was hoping you could help me nonetheless” Viktor chuckled softly.
“Of course, what do you need my love?” “Just something to eat, something small” “Would a pancake or two be sufficient?” Jayce questioned “Sure” Viktor replied. Jayce quickly made his way up and out of bed and to the kitchen to make food leaving Viktor alone in the bedroom. He slowly made his way out of bed and back to the exercise ball feeling like it might help calm the baby if he bounced a little. “Oof, if you are this active why dont you just come now little one?” Viktor spoke as he bounced softly. As if on queue his water broke mid-bounce. “Uh….oh well then” Viktor stumbled a little. “JAYCE” he quickly called for the other. “It’s time!!” 
There was rustling in the kitchen before Jayce came rushing back to their bedroom. “Did you just say-” “It’s time! It’s time! My water just broke, we should probably go” Viktor tried not to let the anxiety get to him. 
Jayce quickly grabbed the go back they’d prepared and gently helped Viktor to his feet and out the door. He’d clean up the mess later, it was more important to get going than anything. Jayce was quickly on the phone with a cab company arranging a pickup for them and they were shortly out the door and rushing to the hospital. “How are you doing Viktor?” Jayce asked as Viktor huffed through waves of cramps again.
“I think everything’s alright so far, I don’t think I’ll be giving birth in this car” Viktor replied. 
It wasn’t long until the cab had them at the hospital and Jayce was running in to grab a wheelchair for Viktor as he got out of the cab with a little assistance of holding onto the door. Once seated and adjusted in the wheelchair Jayce pushed him in quickly to the hospital to check him in. Seeing as the other was in labor they pushed him in quickly to a room and started setting him up to a handful of things including fluids. Viktor wasn’t a stranger to being poked and prodded so he didn’t much mind, it was almost a comfort for him at this point. When being given the option of an epidural over gas he chose the gas as his back was already a center point of problems and he didn’t want anything affecting that.
It was a relief for him to get changed out of his clothing and into a hospital gown, thankfully the go bag had a change of clothing for him for later. He knew things may feel a little invasive during this whole process and was trying to prepare himself for that as well as the reality that he was going to have to push out their child, and soon. Viktor began to hyperventilate a little, his thoughts going miles per hour. Jayce slowly approached him and reached out to rub his shoulders. “You’re going to be alright, you can do this, I’ll be here the whole time” he reassured Viktor. 
Nurses came in and out to check on Viktor and one even brought him an exercise ball like he’d had at home for him to bounce on per request. He’d felt a little better doing something other than sitting around, and anything that took the weight off his legs helped too. He’d bounce and drink in the gas through a mask as he rode through cramps, groaning at the really bad ones. It wasn’t until he was asked to lay back so that they could check his dilation that he realized it was getting close to time to push. “9 cm” Said a nurse, “you’re so close, just a little more and you’ll be having this baby in no time”  Viktor was getting impatient, he wanted his body back and wanted to be over these cramps.
Jayce sat patiently in the corner of the room, only coming close when asked for, he didn’t want to be overly doting if he was going to be in the way. Viktor lay back in the hospital bed cursing in another language under his breath. It wasn’t until he looked over and made eye contact with his partner that Jayce moved in close and took his hand. “I’m here” he said, holding onto Viktor gently but firmly. 
“You got me into this, you’re helping me through it too” “But of course! Whatever you need” 
“The nurse said I’m almost there, I’m going to have to push soon, and I just need you here” 
It wasn’t much longer that a nurse returned with a doctor and they were taking a look at Viktor again. Viktor hated how violated he felt whenever they came over, his legs wide open in stirrups on the bed, but it was what it was for the situation he was in. He just had to try to make the best of it. “Okay are you ready?? I need you to start pushing” the doctor spoke suddenly to him “What? Already?” “Already, give me a good one in 3, 2-” Viktor wasn’t sure exactly how to give a good push but tried to listen to his body, he couldn’t help but cry out, grasping Jayce’s hand a little tighter. 
“Good good, just keep at it like that, we’re going to try to do this timed, Breathe, Push, Breathe, Push, do you understand? “ Viktor nodded and groaned, trying to breathe between the pushes as instructed. He almost wished for the epidural over the gas as now that he was actually pushing they’d taken it away from him. Jayce stood beside him, holding his hand and rubbing his back with the other. “You’ve got this Viktor” he praised.
It was perhaps 45 minutes of struggling, breathing hard and pushing when the entirety of a new person slipped out of Viktor, making him gasp and cry out. It wasn’t long before his own cry was drowned by the cry of their newborn. Viktor collapsed against the bed and tried to catch his breath. Jayce just looked starry eyed at him and the baby who was cleaned up quickly and brought over to Viktor to hold. “I dont know that I can-” he was starting to say when the baby had been thrust into his arms. “What is it?” Jayce looked up at the doctor. “You’ve got yourselves a beautiful baby girl” 
Jayce just smiled and looked back at Viktor, who was giving the baby skin to skin, seemingly calming it.
“Abigail” Viktor suddenly spoke looking up at Jayce. “I want her to be known as Abigail Talis” Jayce just smiled and nodded, not wanting to argue with Viktor after the effort he just went through to bring her into their world.
“I should let my mother know”, Jayce said as he pulled his phone out. “Do you mind if I take a picture of you two?” “Like this??” “Why not?” “I’m sweaty and half naked, she’s not had a bath herself yet” “You’re perfect, the both of you” Jayce said as he reached up with his phone and took a quick snap of them, he turned his phone to show Viktor. “....I suppose that’s not bad” He said as he continued to hold Abigail close, sighing and sitting back against the bed. Jayce sent the photo to his mother who quickly texted him back in excitement asking when she could visit to which Jayce replied once they were home they could take visitors but right now they wanted to be just themselves at the hospital. It wasn’t long until a nurse was checking in with them again and this time asking if Viktor has tried feeding the baby yet. Viktor flushed a little and shook his head, he wasn’t sure he was comfortable with an audience to which the nurse shook her head a little. “I can give you more privacy if you like, but you should really try, and if you’re having trouble let us know, we’re here to help after all”  
She left after that, leaving Jayce and Viktor alone in the room with their baby. Viktor frowned a little at being told to try to breastfeed but knew that the nurse was probably right. His breasts did develop some during the pregnancy and weren’t as small as they’d been previously. Slowly he unwrapped the maternity gown enough to open it and stick the baby’s head in close. He gasped when she latched on almost immediately. Jayce just watched and took more pictures when he could, texting back and forth with his mother and family now who were excitedly congratulating them. It wasn’t until Viktor began to sob that Jayce stepped closer, “What is it?”
“She’s just so perfect” he choked out as he continued to feed his eager baby.
Jayce reached down and wiped away Viktor’s tears. “ I couldn’t agree more”
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xxplastic-cubexx · 1 month ago
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erik will genuinely jump at any chance he can to steal charles' last name and be so catty about it i know this for a fact WHAT is his deal
[Magneto (2011)]
#cherik#snap chats#if i had a nickel every time erik went by 'mr xavier' at some point id have two and its making me wheeze#like at least the first time it was to be headmaster or whatever so it at least makes sense but vjaevlEVEKJV WHY#needed our mandatory charles mention for the magneto issue ig alright ill take it#legit tho why did he feel inclined to steal charles name vjelkvjeaklj like his names 'erik magnus' in this#while i was trying to answer that fashion ask i stumbled upon this thing and gave it a quick read#its only one issue and fairly short so why not#Context Squad I Guess this issue's just sharing the first time erik moves to new york#hence. stealing charles name i guess vjaLVKJAJKL like girl you didnt do anything evil yet ..... alright .... just to be sure ig...#do you ever think he freezes getting called mr xavier or is he so used to it at this point#maybe he twirling his hair and giggling to himself every time he hear it idk#oh but yeah he didnt do anything evil yet. he actually gets his suit in this issue from a woman named cassandra .....#not charles sister of course but still im laughing anyway because he wants her to join him in his Not-Brotherhood group#and shes like 'i met you like five days ago youre insane' and the sort#its an ok read. its unnerving seeing erik smile so much- especially so broadly but its not like. an offensive issue. its standard#it does the job on sharing the story. not that im a critic of any sort vjalkjkaLJ#at the very least it's implied erik has a notable accent in this so thats very cool 🥰#its always cute whenever erik admits hes a drama lover too like vjeLVJEalkvjelkj like at least hes self aware this theater kid 😩#ok bye ive been meaning to work on something but ive been running around all day valkvjkae
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puppppppppy · 1 year ago
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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seraheart · 11 months ago
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I kinda wish that the DetCo canon would do more with the fact that the relationship (I don't mean this in the shipping sense) between Conan and Haibara has been, or at least logically should have been, really strained for a long time.
Originally, they had this development where Haibara was really messed up, overly cautious and trying to force her maladaptive survival psychological issues onto other people, and generally not good at positive interactions. Then, slowly, Conan and the others started gaining her trust (not entirely though), and also her general mental health improved (never completely though).
But then it turned around, and started getting significantly worse. Haibara isn't really in a healing arc anymore. If Aoyama still took her seriously as a character (which, to be fair, I don't think is the case), she would be in a retraumatization arc. Conan and his allies are limiting Haibara's agency, invading her privacy, dismissing her concerns about all this, and pretending that this isn't happening while she can obviously tell that it is happening.
I think the really obvious turning point was the Mystery Train arc. Haibara even called Conan and Agasa out on it and stated that she wouldn't forgive if she were to be treated like that again. Instead of taking her hurt seriously, they just told her she should "be thankful", and dismissed her hurt as "tsundere", refusing to take her trauma seriously after using it and using her as a mere chess piece in their plans (and Akai even triggering her more by gloating about it).
Since then, Haibara has been trapped under the constant, violating supervision of these people who have demonstrated that they don't respect her, and also refuse to acknowledge that the problem even exists. It's not a situation where her recover arc could realistically continue. By all logic, she should be spiraling, getting worse again.
And maybe this is on purpose; Aoyama definitely didn't plan the manga to get this long when he introduced Haibara, and originally the slow-burn of her recovery was a good way to postpone a scenario where Haibara could actually trust Conan enough to give him the kind of information that would lead to the finale arc. But... eventually, even with the extreme slow burn of DetCo, Haibara's recovery arc and relationship development with Conan would have gotten to the point where her continued withholding of crucial information would no longer make sense... and, I guess, rather than start concluding the story at a humanly reasonable rate, Aoyama just opted to nuke Haibara's whole recovery arc and character and relationship development (not only with Conan but also Agasa).
Which could have been tragic but realistic (albeit kind of a major downer out of tune with the manga's usual tone, and upsetting to anyone who had been invested in the slow-burn mental health improvement arc), but then Aoyama can't even be arsed to take it seriously, and is now just pretending that the situation with Haibara and her relationships with Conan and Agasa are still "normal" instead of FUBAR.
It's regrettable and really shows how much everyone dragging out this franchise to milk it for more money just... doesn't actually care about the story anymore, hasn't in a long time. They'll eventually just kill central, fan-favorite, long-running story arcs rather than actually letting them conclude or evolve in a satisfying manner if that would mean risking their precious status quo (which has warped beyond all recognition anyway, so I'm not sure why they bother).
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icewindandboringhorror · 9 months ago
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examining a seemingly normal image only to slowly realize the clear signs of AI generated art.... i know what you are... you cannot hide your true nature from me... go back where you came from... out of my sight with haste, wretched and vile husk
#BEGONE!!! *wizard beam blast leaving a black smoking crater in the middle of the tumblr dashboard*#I think another downside to everyone doing everything on phone apps on shitty tiny screens nowadays is the inability to really see details#of an image and thus its easier to share BLATANTLY fake things like.. even 'good' ai art has pretty obvious tells at this point#but especially MOST of it is not even 'good' and will have details that are clearly off or lines that dont make sense/uneven (like the imag#of a house interior and in the corner there's a cabinet and it has handles as if it has doors that open but there#are no actual doors visible. or both handles are slightly different shapes. So much stuff that looks 'normal' at first glance#but then you can clearly tell it's just added details with no intention or thought behind it. a pattern that starts and then just abruptly#doesn't go anywhere. etc. etc. )#the same thing with how YEARS ago when I followed more fashion type blogs on tumblr and 'colored hair' was a cool ''''New Thing''' instead#of being the norm now basically. and people would share photos of like ombre hair designs and stuff that were CLEARLY photoshop like#you could LITERally see the coloring outside of the lines. blurs of color that extend past the hair line to the rest of the image#or etc. But people would just share them regardless and comment like 'omg i wish I could do this to my hair!' or 'hair goallzzzz!! i#wonder what salon they went to !!' which would make me want to scream and correct them everytime ( i did not lol)#hhhhhhggh... literally view the image on anything close to a full sized screen and You Will SEe#I don't know why it's such a pet peeve of mine. I think just as always I'm obsessed with the reality and truth of things. most of the thing#that annoy me most about people are situations in which people are misinterpreting/misunderstanding how something works or having a misconc#eption about somehting thats easily provable as false or etc. etc. Even if it's harmless for some random woman on facebook to believe that#this AI generated image of a cat shaped coffee machine is actually a real product she could buy somewhere ... I still urgently#wish I could be like 'IT IS ALL AN ILLUSION. YOU SEE???? ITS NOT REALL!!!!! AAAAA' hjhjnj#Like those AI shoes that went around for a while with 1000000s of comments like 'omg LOVE these where can i get them!?' and it's like YOU#CANT!!! YOU CANT GET THEM!!! THEY DONT EXIST!!! THE EYELETS DONT EVEN LINE UP THE SHOES DONT EVEN#MATCH THE PATTERNS ARE GIBBERISH!! HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE THEY ARE NOT REAL!??!!' *sobbing in the rain like in some drama movie*#Sorry I'm a pedantic hater who loves truth and accuracy of interpretation and collecting information lol#I think moreso the lacking of context? Like for example I find the enneagram interesting but I nearly ALWAYS preface any talking about it#with ''and I know this is not scientifically accurate it's just an interesting system humans invented to classify ourselve and our traits#and I find it sociologically fascinating the same way I find religion fascinating'. If someone presented personality typing information wit#out that sort of context or was purporting that enneagram types are like 100% solid scientific truth and people should be classified by the#unquestionaingly in daily life or something then.. yeah fuck that. If these images had like disclaimers BIG in the image description somewh#re like 'this is not a real thing it's just an AI generated image I made up' then fine. I still largely disagree with the ethics behind AI#art but at least it's informed. It's the fact that people just post images w/o context or beleive a falsehood about it.. then its aAAAAAA
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squeakadeeks · 1 year ago
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if i had a dollar for every time a religious missionary knocked on my door to "spread the good news" while i was actively in an acute mental health crisis i'd have 2 dollars, which isnt a lot but also. how many times does this have to happen before they stop coming.
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crystalkitty1220 · 7 months ago
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Man I wonder where the leader of the fear realm could've gone, it's alMOST LIKE NEVIN HAS AN
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#had to re-edit the image real quick because the original edit was from a post I made about Drew years ago#and while the Drew thing is becoming less and less likely. Nevin havinv one has basically been canon since#someone mentioned Greg's (was it Britney's) aura being familiar in s2ch1. ive been putting together a list of every line#that points to Nevin's aura throughout the whole thing (most from s2ch1 but then s2ch10 came out and it was really canon at that point)#but clearly i'm running out of time to say ''i fucking called it'' before it's explicitly stated and i dont want to be in another situation#where somebody else will beat me to a theory and me posting anything about it will seem like copying them. sorry about that btw i had#thought i had already mentioned theorizing that nevin was possessed by a demon in that old theory i made but i had forgotten that one was#super old and was about sigma. so no copying there i just got extremely paranoid there was a mention of a cult and i was like ''nuh uh#that's way too specific and out there of a detail to end up in both our theories'' and i forgot the rest of my super old post was outdated#as hell. and echos had gone ''yeah they're so similar!'' and i took their word for it but now i'm realizing they were probably just trying#to be supportive. so yeah no copying there i was just beaten to the punch of saying something. but i will NOT back down from the aura shit#because i have been calling that shit FROM THE START or at least since i started reading ibvs back when ch20 came out.#also not backing down from saying chris was the worse friend because these past few chapters are the first time isaac has done anything tha#could knowingly upset chris meanwhile chris has. let edward drag isaac to the lair after isaac said edward would beat him up. chose not to#believe edward was holding the secrets over their heads because 'it was something isaac had said' and then immediately distrusted edward in#the next chapter because a random person he didn't know said to steal a book (might i mention how that entire scene proves chris' lack of#development and refusal to take responsibility because it perfectly alludes to when chris had brought those fireworks into his old school#and makes me wonder if charlie has actually gotten him in trouble with his past schools or if he's still just not taking responsibility#and if him following nevin to the woods to test out their powers is an extension of ''if something bad happens its not my fault''#like seriously this man would bring a mysterious suitcase onto a plane if he's told to). uh what was i talking about agai#anyway on a related note my mental state has only gotten worse since i left tumblr and the habit of thinking about chris instead of sleepin#or doing schoolwork has not stopped. so i was still failing for a while and might graduate now but am still staying away from tumblr.#so yeah this was a little update and im not going to linger this time im just going to leave tumblr again right after hitting post#addendum because i just can't let things go. and was thinking about chris again. i don't think his lack of development is because of bad#writing (anymore. i used to.). instead i'm certain his character arc is going to continue into him following someone (nevin probably) into#doing something really bad. and then he'll finally get actual consequences and go 'oh shit i fucked up real bad this time'#if you think that theory is reaching too far into the future you should hear mine about isaac dying at the end lmao
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theunconcernedembalmer · 2 years ago
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so. leans on the counter. gate huh. slips off the counter and falls flat on my fa
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nexttothelamp · 4 days ago
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...
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strawberryfaced · 3 months ago
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I NEED. TO DO. OR MAKE SOMETHING. PLEASE
#actually I haven’t had this overwhelming creative energy in a while it feels TERRIBLE thank you very much#okay the thing is. there’s like many things actually so I am going to go Explode in the tags now#the first thing that I am like painfully terribly aching to do is Write something#I talked about this the other day but like. first of all I haven’t added anything to my poems collection for a while and the other day I re#d this beautifully beautifully written story and now I’m like. INEED. TO WRITE A FUCKINGN BOOK#and then there’s also Knitting. a few months ago we impulsively purchased a bunch of knitting tools and now it’s just sitting in my house b#cause I tried it once and I couldn’t do it so I kind of. gave up. now suddenly I want to like. knit a scarf AND ITS EATING AWAY AT ME#I NEED TO LIKE. SIT DOEN AND WATCH A YOUTUBE TUTORIAL AND MAN I COULD TOTALLY DO THAT BECAUSE IM ON HOLIDAY#BUT LIKE. THERES A MILLION OTHER THINGS I WANT TO DO SO IF COURSE THE OPTION MY BRAIN PICKS IS#DO NOTHING AT ALL.#also this is a bit of a silly one but like. I have this long long loooong list in my notes app that I started in 2021#and it’s just Big words. and like. the thing is they used to stick in my brain. I used to be able to add them to the list and use it whenev#needed. now I just write it down and it’s GONE and that makes me want to put myself in an oven because WHY.#I NEED. TO BE THAT PERSON. WITH THE USELESSLY ABYSSAL VOCABULARY#SO I REALLY JUST WABT TO SIT DOWN FOR 2 HOURS AND MEMORISE AND STUDY BUT then again. my brain is all or nothing and#usually it is the latter#another thing is my sketchbook. haven’t added to that in a while and I want to do that but then I will have to wait til sunset or daylight#because I physically cannot create art with artificial electrical light. but then I’ll have to wait til tomorrow and#I really also want to go outside and just exist before I have no time to after break ends#so Yeah.
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bokuwadekinaiko · 5 months ago
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cw post / tags. sorry
i don't even know if i have the words
to express this
she's gone
and its all my fault
#~ . 🥀#half my brain wants to scream to cry to do something#the other half wants to lie here forever and wait til i go numb#im in such a state of shock rn i .m gonna throw up#for context#2 hours ago as of writing this i received news that a loved one committed suicide#i was one of the only people that knew she was severely depressed / suicidal i shouldve seen the signs#i shouldve helped her more or called her or told someone#i was a coward. i couldn't.#and because i willingly did nothing to stop someone from dying#i am compliant. therefore . its my fault shes dead#.#this isnt some story where you can rewrite the ending#this is real life#and now i watched someone i love die and will have to live with the guilt of knowing i couldve done something but chose not to#the worst type of person.#i didnt deserve to be friends with someone like her.#no one did. she was smart and witty and oh so stubborn (affectionate)#we both loved the same bands. i don't know if i can ever listen to those bands the same way again#god i cant think#im actually gonna throw up#this is the 2nd time in my life something like this has happened. 3rd if you count all COD not just suicide#knowing something is wrong with a loved one but being too much of a wuss to tell anyone or help them or do anything useful#god im fucking worthless#my friends and family will vent to me and share their problems with me and ill say i care and tell myself i care#but givenmy behavior i don't think i can ever say i can#idoly standing by while people i love suffer#fuckin pathetic#this was a deliberate choice i made. this is all my fault#this is all my fault
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early-october-skies · 8 months ago
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Me when we don't speak anymore by bears in trees
#lizzierants#had a sudden unplanned job interview today. i wanted to cry the whole time but managed to keep it together and now the anxiety has suddenly#caught up to me and it feels BAD the sudden thought of that what if my friends just dont actually like me and they like me purely because#theyre worried for what would become of me if they stopped being friends with me when purely of course id be fine eventually but i worry#that cause im on antidepressants people just think im automatically suicidal when something bad goes wrong which is not the case im doing#good i dont want to die but what if all my friends hate me what if this whole time i have loved them so so much and they just tolerate me#someday my friends will die and i had that i hate that someday we wont be friends even if its decades in the future i love all of them with#my heart that sometimes i feel it is overfilling i love them i love them and what am i without them i am everything i have ever loved i am#overthinking however i cannot stop this what if my own best friend is avoiding me? why am i thinking this? what evidence do i have to back#this up? nothing only for the fact my own brain feels as though i love people too much and they are uncomfortable with it i feel awful wtf#i have learned to keep my emotions from people because i dont want them to worry. i dont want people to do something or not do something bec#ause they think it will upset me i want people do do as they please i want to be open for my friends to share their issues i want to help#and im sitting here wirrying if they hate me so i turn here to shout in the void because the only person i know irl who follows me on here#most likely doesnt read these tags and if you are please ingore this i misjudged your terrible attention span also i love you very much#anyway a few weeks ago i realised my worst fear is no longer death. but the death of my friendship with my beloved friend. and thats fucking#terrifying prospect however if they were to be like yo i dont like you anymore id respect that decision and id be okay because their happine#is the most important thing to me and thats okay but i couldnt bare with the fact that they feel like they had to be ffiends with me because#they have to. i hate the prospect of them feeling trapped in a friendship theh dont want to be in. all the while i feel i cannot communicate#this to anyone because how would i go about it im very anxious i am shaking i am having a bad time very bad time actually im going to start#crying but its okay <3 crying is good for stress and health and its been a while since ive cried so maybe this will help me feel better <3#i will heal and ill be okay <3
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