#It's not exactly.... spiritual
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Welp getting this out of my system
#dol#degrees of lewdity#dol kylar#kylar the loner#that kitty is exactly how I imagine Kylar spiritually
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"Duality is always secretly unity."
Alan Watts
#not my vid#Nothing is a coincidence...Everything is exactly the way it is supposed to be... feels like I was being prepared for this all since#i was born and I knew or even made the plan even before I came here and I was led to it being fulfilled...#all of these occurrences feel too scripted... Omfg...#duality#non duality#alan watts#quotes#spiritual awareness#spirituality#spiritual connection#love#lovers
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it probably says something either sad or deeply unfortunate about me as a person, but I'm darkly amused to see some people react to the reveal of the ultimate permeability of souls in tlt as a triumphant thing -- the "you can't take 'loved' away!!!" side of it all -- when my first reaction was such an immediate wave of 'oh, oh so this is why this series is horror, I truly understand now' distress haha. ngl the final confirmation of the self not being inviolable in the deepest way freaks me the fuck out far more than any moment of body horror in the series has managed. (these two elements are of course the two sides of one thematic coin; it's about the horror of our bodies and minds and selves not being inviolable things, and about the effect of violence on them on so many different levels. violence psychological and interpersonal, physical, subtextually sexual, emotional, medical, political, a whole unlovely smörgåsbord of indignity and violation a person can be exposed to, and on a broader scale the spectrum of violence colonialism wields). The world and other people being capable of leaving indelible marks on us for good or ill through their presence in our lives is of course a pretty self-evident demonstrable truth in the real world, but somehow having it be proven metaphysically just uh. Fucks me up!
It also drives home to me just how perfectly Muir has captured the dilemma at the heart of human connection and intimacy: the fact that the thing that gives us life and meaning is also capable of harming us so deeply. the same thing that can be so beautiful — even in a bittersweet, violently transformative form like with the creation of Paul — when done mutually and consensually and compassionately, is the same process that means someone like John can touch someone else's soul and 'after he's put his fingers on something, you'll never find anyone else's fingerprints on it; too much noise'. I think the text itself — the whole series, because to me this is what it is ultimately about, this tension between individuation/self vs. love/connection/enmeshment — is far more ambivalent in its treatment of it than saying it’s inherently a good thing or inherently a bad thing. The only thing it says for sure is that it is always a thing, that thinking you’re ever getting away from it is the height of futility, and that through being alive (or even through being dead lol) it is something you have to engage with in some way no matter what. Contact with other people is deeply necessary — without it we sicken and die. it can be the most beautiful and meaningful thing in a human life, and the most unspeakably horrific. All of these people are searching for some way to be whole, whether in total self-contained sufficiency on their own or in melding with someone else as their ‘other half’, and stumbling around in the dark they reach for each other and score deep wounds into the thing they’re trying to touch even when they don’t mean to. Taken to horrific extremes with the form of lyctorhood John guided his disciples to when they were ‘children — playing in the reflections of stars in a pool of water, thinking it was space’, because while people hurt each other all the time with differing levels of intentionality behind it, what John did was deliberate. It weaponizes the misapprehension of what closeness must be and destroys everyone involved in the process… and all because it leaves John the one sun their ruined lives have left to orbit around, because that’s the closest thing his soul will allow to connection. He doesn’t understand that to truly touch something you have to truly let it touch you back, and then wonders why he’s never satisfied.
‘The horrors of love’ has been memed to death, I know, but… yeah. That is what it is, isn’t it.
#the locked tomb#the locked tomb meta#the unwanted guest#the unwanted guest spoilers#I wrote most of this right after reading tug for the first time but it's been so hard putting exactly what I mean into words#this is my best shot so far haha#I feel like a lot of a people have approached this lil 'revelation' a bit too... idk mechanistically? for my personal taste#I think it's far more thematically and metaphorically true than a scavenging hunt to see who's been rubbing off on who#spiritually. of course. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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A very self indulgent tatted and pierced up Ichimatsu thas it
#mr. osomatsu#ichimatsu#ichimatsu matsuno#ososan#osomatsu san#matsuno ichimatsu#my art#suggestive#piercings#tattoos#todomatsu#he's there verbally and spiritually but not emotionally cuz he's tired of ichimatsu's bs#he spends all his money on cat treats -- tattoos--and peircings#the tatts on his body cost a lot more than totty's phone and it pisses totty off lol#ichi: ''yknow monetarily my body is worth more than everyone here.''#totty: ''and yet you look the cheapest why is that? hmm? 💅''#ichi: ''bitter because you desperately want a tattoo but don't have the balls to commit to one huh?''#totty: *holding back tears* "f-fuk you.''#totty caves and finally gets a small tattoo on his thigh#he cries while ichimatsu holds his hands through all of it#ichi's so proud of his baby bro can't even tease him cuz he knows totty is being so brave about it#but also ichimatsu is an even bigger bitch when getting his tatts and literally passes out#every single time because needles man. But totty don't need to know that lol#choro: ''you can get a needle inserted in you for hours at a time but can't sit through one 1 min vaccination??''#ichi: ''it's not the same fappy. I get a cool forever art piece with a tatt. What do i get with a vaccination??''#choro: ''the avoidance of death and illness.''#ichi: ''exactly why prolong my existence here?''#choro: ''we really need to get you a therapist.''#a e i o queue#made and tagged this months ago and forgot i never posted it
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honestly critical role has never been more relatable than Caduceus/Taliesin in the Rumblecusp arc
being put in an environment where you SHOULD thrive, only to fail comically at literally any given opportunity and discovering for the first time that you have some surprising capacity for resentment for something you love that you've built your whole identity on
also I know Caduceus is dumb as rocks in an education sense but those investigation checks they kept having to make felt like they SHOULD be wisdom checks at this point (because common fucking sense would tell you to just hand your shit to someone else once you notice you lose possessions every night) so watching him spectacularly fail every single one of those felt exactly like my life feels right now. Like I should know all the ways to prevent this and yet every day I fail again at the same task right out the gate
the absolute resignation this is all met with. like even for Caduceus that was a level of nonreaction I never thought possible. not a zen unbotheredness, just complete defeat. there is so much frustration underneath the surface and yet such a complete lack of energy to try and fight it, truly only going through a pandemic and/or a real weird mental health funk can breed the vibe of "help. it's again."
also, as someone who doesn't really give a shit about sex, like Caduceus, and prides themselves on their eloquence, like Taliesin, I've never seen myself so clearly represented as i have in the character and the player's combined struggle against the horny-twelve-year-olds energy of this cast
I too have experienced the "i see you giggling over something i said that wasn't even that much of an innuendo but i'm just gonna keep talk- oh no yeah no what i've said now is just a much bigger innuendo" so many times
and then you try and choose your words more carefully. because that's like, the one thing you're good at. and discover that a) once the giggles get going, it doesn't fucking matter and b) there's now not one synonym left in your brain that's not an open invitation
and now you're somehow the least invested in the joke but the most embarrassed by it
"how much of your brain is just innuendo???" the number of times i've wanted to ask people that
the deep disappointment when Travis joined into the madness
living vicariously through the mumbled asides of "all of you. it's all of you" "it's nonstop!"
also watching your group make a TERRIBLE plan but being unable to come up with a better one, so instead of poking holes in it until all your friends hate you you just quietly watch the catastrophe happen, and pray you'll have enough restraint left by the end of it to not say "i could've told you so" out loud
#also if and when (hopefully) i ever get out of this funk i hope to be exactly as smug about renewed successes as taliesin v matt's t rex#'oh [my pity for your disappointment] was sarcastic it's all good'#travelercon is truly the gift that keeps on giving isn't it#the theatrics. the holiday-meets-death-cult vibes of it all. the nein collectively going full mama bear over jester at the drop of a hat#absolutely delightful#critical role#the mighty nein#caduceus clay#i relate to this on a spiritual level
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Remember that Allah does not send afflictions to believers except to strengthen them.
#☾#was listening to a podcast about spiritual immunity and it made this point#I heard it exactly when I needed to hear it the most#alhamdullilah
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making an astronomy/meteoritics iterator oc when i know fuckall or at least just very basic things about those things was maybe a mistake. Looking up stuff for reference/inspo like haha i like your funny words magic man
#currently trying to figure out if it could work to make them be built in the center of an impact crater#there is one in canada that has a circular lake i might just steal that#still thinking about what even their deal is and what exactly they do.#they probably studied the rocks n minerals in the crater if their creators havent done that extensively already#and analyse any other material brought to them?#i think they would also do stuff about planets n such they observe their cycles/routes or something like that#I dont think they'd be puuuurely scientific i think there would be a lot of religious or spiritual stuff too#they dont just do the science bits but also how it would/could connect to spirituality and such#they are really really old even by iterator standards so sometimes their theories and research can be a bit outdated#“no stones this spiritual theory is wayyy outdated you cant base your calculations on that. No we will not start working with it again -#-just because you refuse to switch to the new model. Stones please we had this discussion already just give me the star charts i requested"#something like that#carpsounds
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Hi!! Your art is so fucking cool! Can I ask what the process looks like for form line? Ex. What do your sketches look like when they are really rough? How do you go from idea -> final product. 💕
Hadih, thanks so much for your question!
Honestly, it's sort of hard to explain? I do have some sketches to sort of give an idea though.
This sketch I posted a couple days ago is a pretty good example of what my initial concept sketches sometimes look like.. As you can see, they're pretty chaotic and very rough, and usually these sketches are more about getting the idea down then actually making the formline itself. There aren't formline shapes just yet, although I do sometimes sketch out elements or shapes like eyes or bodies or paws/hands that will usually have an ovoid in it, because those elements tend to be a focus or centerpiece. The sketch is obviously not final, and things can change along the way to account for space and balance as well as what I'm trying to convey. (These sketches aren't entirely accurate of course because they're for pieces that are meant to be fusions of character illustrations and formline art, but they're the best thing I can find on my pc at the moment)
The rough sketch helps me figure out the flow of the piece, and once I'm satisfied with it I try and get to putting down the shapes and silhouette, and it's here where I try to find the balance with my rough sketch and how the shapes can fit and behave in the piece to the best of their limits while also still conveying the message I want to send. The most common shape I start with is the focus shapes, which are usually ovoids.
This rough of my harbor seal formline which I sent to my aunt for review sort of gives a better Idea of what I mean when I say I try and focus on where the centerpoints will be. Ovoids are usually a focus, so you can see them pop up a lot; in the body, the head, the eyes, the tail, etc. Ovoids are so important and probably the most common shape in formline art, and one of the most common feedback I get from my aunt is to adjust how the ovoid looks in any one of my pieces; she often compared them to a loaf of bread! You don't want your ovoids to look like a loaf of bread! (Her words, not mine). I feel like I've gotten better at drawing ovoids though, because she gives it as feedback less and less nowadays. Ovoids usually also have to have a bit of weight/perspective to them; it's hard to describe but essentially the top of the ovoid should usually be bigger/thicker/have more weight then the bottom.
From ovoids, the next shapes are usually circles, u-shapes and crescents, then usually y-shapes/trigons. It can be difficult, because the key is to make sure the shapes flow together and feel cohesive, as well as to make sure the negative/positive space balance feels right. Also a fun tidbit, trigons are most typically used to essentially fill space; it's always important to make sure that they are binding bigger shapes like u-shapes and ovoids and not stealing all the space and attention.
The lines in this stage tend to be very rough and messy, and I always try to go over the next rough draft with a smoother and cleaner pen.
Once the initial shapes are done, I'll usually send the piece to my aunt (sometimes I send them earlier on, when I'm in the middle of working out the shapes) for feedback! I am still a student in formline work after all; basically all of my teachings come from my aunt, who has a lot more years of work in formline art then me. She'll give me feedback and tips of what she thinks I should fix or experiment with. I adjust and fix and sometimes even completely delete and redo parts of the piece with her guidance. The list of things she tells me to change decreases with each piece, so I like to take that as a sign that I'm improving!
Once the black and white version of the design is done, I move onto coloring. Usually I already have a color scheme in mind when I go into a piece, so I'll mess around and put down colors and see how well they contrast before I color it. Typically, a piece will have about 3 colors; one for the background, one primary color, and one secondary color. I use a clipping layer to color the entire formline piece with the primary color, and then go in with the pen tool and bucket tool to use the secondary color. Adding in the secondary color is tricky but important because it once again falls into balancing positive and negative space/colors and the transitions between the two.
Once coloring is done, the project is basically finished! Unless there are some other plans I have for it, ie using it for an overlay in a bigger piece, colouring is usually the final stage.
And that's about it! I hope this helps you understand a bit; this isn't a perfect explanation as this is just from my own artistic POV and other nations and artists have their own process, but I hope it helps nonetheless!!
Edit: I forgot I posted other WIP formlines here before 😭 here and here!! You can sort of see me figure out the flow and balance of the designs in between the WIP and the finished piece!
#indigenous art#formline art#indigenous culture#the process of balancing shapes is a lot harder and more complex then I can describe in a tumblr post#it really is a balancing act that can take a long time to learn and i think i still have a way's to go to perfect my abilities#In that way it's sort of hard to describe and put down how exactly I do formline art I think? Bc of how close and thoughtful the process is#there's something very personal and honestly almost spiritual about finding that balance and figuring out how to convey the message you're-#trying to convey even if the piece doesn't seem that way (the amogus one lol). that's the most clear way I can describe it.#i am rambling a lot oops.
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Not therian as in "I was a coyote in a past life" but therian as in "I have autism and always mimicked animal behaviors subconsciously as a child and it became a coping mechanism to the point that my brain began thinking of itself as a coyote brain and now 'therian' is the only label that fits"... ya know..?
#andiv3r rambles#therian#coyote therian#coyote theriotype#hope i dont get any shit for this one#im not shitting on past-life therians btw. it's just that i'm Not One Of Them.#i know exactly why i am the way i am and it's because of my neurodivergence not any spiritual thing#therianthropy#not a past life therian
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Who're your favorite Monogatari girls?
LOOOOOK LOOOOOK SHE IS SO PRETTY NAD BEAUTIFUL AND LOVELY LOOOOK LOOOK HAUUUUUUUUU SHES SOOOOO OCUUUUUUTE SHES PERFECT SHES SO CUTE AND PERFECT AND CUTEEEEE SHES SOOOOOOO PRETTY LOOOOOOOOOOK
#anyways its kiss-shot acerola-orion heart-under-blade#like for sure#i fuckin love nadeko too. she is like me kinda but not really but in a lot of ways i get her. u know#kiss-shot is not really like me at all but she is all of my favorite things in a character#i want to write so and let it be known that every character. every story. she will be in there.#spiritually. maybe even literally.#like. it is just. exactly what i want. from a story id write. u know#i will not be specific bc im pretty sure u and several other followers have not watched kizu#but its so good#i love kiss-shot so much
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"doing good again, angel?" he's trying SO hard to be normal about his angel while he literally always looks like a victorian woman diagnosed with hysteria after seeing a bit of bare skin around aziraphale. if aziraphale ever rolled his sleeves up it would be OVER for him he would EXPLODE and never reform out of embarrassment.
#u dont get it i understand in a spiritual level i talk to her in my head#i was forcing my sister to watch s2 and she was like 'crowley is literally you it's hilarious everything he does is exactly the kind of#bullshit u would do' and i took it as the highest of compliments so#my doesn't even have a fucking heart yet he always looks ready to throw it up around aziraphale#good omens#azicrow#good omens s2#aziracrow#ineffable husbands#ineffable spouses#go s2 spoilers#go s2#good omens season 2#good omens s2 spoilers
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Title: In small hands (hold big hearts)
Author: peachyM00 (@peachym00)
Rating: Explicit
Pairing: Vegas Theerapanyakul/Pete Saengtham
Summary:
Venice is five years old when Pete saves his life. Vegas is twenty-five years old when he realises love doesn't have to be painful. And Macau can't wait for his senior year to end so he can finally come home from boarding school.
#kinnporsche#kpts#kpts fic rec#kinnporsche the series#vp pairing#vegaspete#venice theerapanyakul#nanny pete#not exactly but like spiritually
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met an uncle this weekend who I've met briefly like 4 times since 2000 (when I was, you know, 10) and I'm fascinated to learn that we are extremely similar
#like he is a LOT more intense than i am#unchecked neurodivergence going let's do whatever the fuck seems like a good idea right Now#but some things about how we function and perceive the world are super super similar#and I think it's partly a similar nd flavour thing and partly a similar type of perception of spiritual stuff and Vibes#writing this to remember it mainly but we both had the exact same feelings about granddad's place and i've heard that from no one else#the land itself isn't welcoming there and it's distressing if you're sensitive to that kind of thing#also same relationship to noise and alone time and a bunch of other things. cool to see. always did like him#also he slipped up with my name exactly once and immediately corrected himself#more than i can say for my eldest uncle who i see a few times every year 🙄#family feature#applied faunology
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Fun OC fact of the day:
These four are technically related.
The three night elves are siblings, but if you go far back enough in the family tree it turns out they all share a common ancestor with Tau - and oddly enough the nelves are actually closer to that ancestor than Tau is. Their parents are very, very old elves, and all in all only a few generations removed from the dark trolls that bore them.
Kaharau is a dark troll who, according to legend, wanted to cheat death by becoming a loa. He sought to achieve this by having his friends and family pay him tributes in life, something that most saw as foolish or a joking manner.
The young ones took that to heart though, and a few too many eager younglings was more than enough to fulfill the old man's wish. It's said that ol' Kaharau became a trickster spirit in The Other Side, and while few know of his story, he is kept alive in legend and song and the occasional offering made by those who find some joy in his tale.
Kaharau's descendants would eventually split in two lines. One line was changed by the Well of Eternity into something entirely new, becoming the night elves that Adagio, Andryza and Rex were born from. The other line continued as they always had, and Urutau is now one of the few living grandchildren of a trickster loa.
#artists on tumblr#world of warcraft#warcraft troll#night elf#dark trol#kaldorei#lore tag#oc:urutau#oc:adagio#oc:andryza#oc:mangorex#they all have a little more troll in them than the average night elf does adagio in particular#she is thousands and thousands of years older than her siblings are and their parents are thousands and thousands of years older than her#they all inherited little tusks and fangs and andryza inherited something else from their troll ancestors that's a little... different#:)#tau is sensitive to spiritual activity around them which could be atributed to kaharau's blood#or it could also be atributted to them surviving a deadly illness as a young infant#which could in turn be attributed to a loa's blood keeping them alive#who knows :)#tau sure doesn't they never even heard of granpa kaharau and isn't likely to ever hear of him#he's not exactly a high and mighty spirit. just a funny old man
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the only thing that irritates me as badly as new agers is western christians trying to explain away the spiritual with pseudoscience
#brightts ramblings#religion#spirituality#someone i know believes that if your dna is wiped from existence my god it'll wipe people's memories#which is the moat pseudoscientific nonsense ive ever seen#AND TIED IT INTO SIMULATION THEIRY WITH#'well it's all a computer system run by god so it's like deleting a program'#EVEN DELETING A FILE LEAVES A TRACE UNTIL IT IS FULLY OVERWRITTEN WHICH CAN TAKE MULTIPLE FULL DRIVE WIPES#AND EVEN THEN. EVEN THEN DATA CAN BE FOUND#its like new age which puts so much focus on dna#like i do stay rational and believe everything should be approached from a scientific ANGLE#but you do not know everything.#you don't understand how sea creatures function why do you think you know#exactly how an almighty creator of the universe would wok#work*
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You ever finish a drawing that you really like and then you spend the next three days randomly looking at it for minutes at a time like that could make it possible for you to absorb its alluring and magnetic essence with your eyes
#this is me with my icon rn. also this is silly but yeah it really feels like that#i experienced the same thing but even more intensely back in february with the short comic i made then#and then also with some of the paintings i made during my painting course days#admiring the colors and lighting on this mundane green bottle. why not#honestly this might be the first time in my life when i'm making things and i sometimes end up actually liking them fully#no little extra gripes with it that could ruin it. i just like the thing as it is. love it even. it's exactly as it should be#this feeling is one of the top things that make drawing and overall at least attempting to make art worth it#i also wonder if anyone else experiences this thing where the image of a certain character stays in your sort of visual imagination sphere#like the thing becomes associated with everything that happens at that time. the music i listen to etc#it almost feels like i sort of AM this thing. like. spiritually#ok this is hard to explain without sounding kind of odd LMAO#it's just that i've never seen anyone express this exact sentiment. with seeing the character in your minds eye sorta#i mean hmmmm. ofc fursonas and all different types of sonas and such exist. re: the identification thing#i actually find the concept of an 'avatar' as something that represents you (in a digital setting mostly) really intriguing#it was actually one of the things i seriously considered as the subject of my bachelor's thesis#but yeah ok i'm just saying this so that you all know that i AM that little purple kitty holding a heart. btw#ok i'm going to go eat dinner now. don't mind me and my strange long-winded monologues#goosepost
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