#It's even funnier the second time because her mom is doing it to her

[zeether]

I have only seen about 12 episodes of KP so far and it's only happened twice, but the puppy dog pout might be the best running joke

[ggukkieisintominnie]

JIKOOK ANTI'S WERE FOOLED INTO TUNING IN TO AYS

and we cheer 🥂

I want to gush out how much I love this week's episode very much. It was everything I could've asked for definitely comes second after episode 2. Beside everything Jikook; what made it more special is that alot of ANTI'S tuned in to watch.

🤭

In episode 3 most anti's tuned in because of the addition of Tae. They came in gun blazing that they will get MOMENTS. So they very much loved and appreciated that selfie scene and swiming pool scene. They even claimed that Jungkook looked happier. And Jimin illness made for fewer Jikook moment. Therefore it safe to say episode 3 fed them and made them very much happy so episode 4 was definitely a must.

Oh boy how they were proven wrong. Anti's got gagged. Jikook karma striked so hard even I was gagged.

Jikook barechested. Jikook hard-core flirting. Jikook sharing a bed. Jikook eating from the same cup of ramen. Jimin caring for Jungkook. Jungkook calling Jimin pretty. Jungkook's mom only mentioning Jimin and her soft endearing way of saying his name. Jikook cuddling and watching the sunset together just after Jimin spoke about romance. Jungkook showing Jimin unreleased footage of his solo endeavors. Jungkook opening up to Jimin about his lack of sleep. Jikook going to sleep at the same time. Jikook role playing. Jikook snorkeling... and the list goes on.

Although the highlights were Jungkook and Jimin further confirming that AYS is indeed a Jikook show and Tae is simply a guest. They clocked that tea. As well as Jimin and Jungkook giving Anti's something for comparison -Jikook's own rendition of the swimming pool scene.

🤭

No matter how much Anti's try to recreate history, they will forever remember episode 4 becuase this time they saw what us, jikookers see in real time. At the same time they watched jikook jikooking.

I'm sure they were pissed. Honestly I would do anything to watch their live reaction to the episode. I can bet other's dropped the show and those who kept on believing a moment will come watched till the end. I hope they cried themselves to sleep that exact day.

Episode 4 hit them with the harsh reality that jikook are naturals. That the so called script given to them is being acted out marvelously. Jikook really need their Oscar's it long overdue. Also mama jeon her acting was spectacular. Anti's watched and realized that we jikook supporters don't have to force a jikook interaction because it given to us without begging. That we do not have to manipulate and analyze a scene, or rely on bad camera angles and bad lighting to claim a jikook interaction.

Anti's were caught by surprise. And it will haunt them forever.

What funnier is that this people are masochists and never seem to learn their lesson. They are indeed gonna tune in for next week episode because "can you be my girlfriend?" promises for a moment.

Well well... I guess we wait for next week to find out. But I know Jikook. Jungkook is legit the best sniper to their delusions. Jimin and Jungkook will absolutely make those anti's wish to die once again.

Anti's should remember they will forever remain desperate while we, the ones who support and are loyal to Jikook will keep on getting our moment becuase we support a spontaneous bond.

Jikook for the win.

And once again nothing for the haters.

😝😝

[lifeless-discodancer]

You know how sometimes in DE fics when Kim transfers to precint 41 he and Harry don't get partnered together but instead Kim gets parnered with Judit and Harry stays with Jean?

Something i've never seen before is Judit becoming Harry's partner and Jean becoming Kim's wich like i get it, it sounds like the worst possible outcome but i think it would be so funny to read because on one hand we have Judit who has been working at C wing for only two months and who, based purely on the small amount of knowledge we have about her personality, is probably the epitome of the boring cop archetype, getting paired with Harry who will not leave her rest or leave her alone and will probably drag her into a bunch of weird shit and stereo investigations; and on the other, funnier hand we have Kim who above all appreciates a professional work relationship and who is also the number one champion of the holding grudges contest, and Jean who is honestly a huge asshole, incapable of forming any relationship that isn't codependent and who already left a weird (bad) impression on Kim by not doing his job for days and subjecting him and two other people to watch his public break up with Harry (also he came second in the holding grudges contest).

So this leaves us with:

Judit in the same position as the little girl who gets sat next to the loudest boy in class with the hope that she will be a good influence on him, except that she's not a little girl she's an adult cop with kids of her own that keeps getting asked to babysit other adult cops probably because she's the only woman in the unit. And i'm not saying this in a "Judit is the team mom" sense but in a "her workplace is so fucking misogynist" one. [Actually, now that i think about it this could be a good opportunity to explore the sexual harasment she experienced at the hands of her last partner, as well as her experience and the expectations her superiors and coworkers have of her, and the ones she has of herself, because she's the only woman in a male dominated workplace and (and a female cop on top of it (notice the emphasis on cop)) that she can't really fulfill because of the kind of person she is (a very normal, passive and tired kind of person). Also i think Harry would work nicely as parallel to her last partner. Where's the fic about it?]

Kim and Jean who already started on the wrong foot back in Martinaise even if none of them knew it at the moment. For them i can only imagine the most passive agresive partnership to ever exist but probably at the start of it they were doing their best to keep things civil. Jean was trying because, even if he thinks Kim is "bewitched by the shitkid", he's working with a decorated police lieutenant and, at least in his own mind, he's a very professional officer and he has to leave a good impression of himself and the C wing (he's definitely not doing that); Kim was trying because at first he didn't have much of an opinion on Jean (he swears) and, since he was complaining so much about Harry's work he thought Jean would at least have a good work ethic and be professional, also he too wanted to leave a good impression on his new coworkers. Of course the niceties went to shit the second one of them opened their mouth to say something that wasn't completely work related (it was like a game of chicken for days, weeks maybe, who will be the first to set fire to this perfectly normal, totally no filled with masked mutual annoyance, work partnership (it was Jean)). After that they argue like a couple of old ladies, and sometimes Kim thinks "maybe Jean is not that bad" but then Jean says something rude, or ableist, or homophobic or just something about Harry that Kim can't agree with, and then he dislikes him again, other times Jean thinks "maybe the lieutenant and i are finally understanding eachother" but then Kim will start lecturing him about something with the most condescending tone, or he'll drive his car like he's being followed by a missile, or give him a nasty side eye when he sees him taking drugs or even worst, he'll defend the shitkid when he's "rightfully" mad with him, and then he dislikes him again. This keeps for the entire duration of their partnership.

Harry is probably just a bit bummed out because he and Kim won't be partners anymore but he will try his best to not say that to Judit (he's a feminist after all), still he has to recover quickly from the disappointment since he has some real shit to worry about now (Shit like: I have to pay rent to my landlord?!!? How do i get into my bank account? Do i even have a bank account? Wait, who's my landlord? And other questions you would probably have too if you ever got amnesia that severe). He complains to Judit about not having Kim as a partner and Judit is rightfully offended but doesn't say anything (poor woman give her a break). He spends the entire duration of that partnership dragging Judit around Jamrock in side quests while she tries, unsuccessfully, to get him back on their current cases (he does not listen to her because he's a shit feminist), still he comes around to finish the original cases eventually (Harry apologizes a lot for not listening to her, Judit tells him it's fine because she's honestly so tired and it's so awkward(if she goes home to find even more work she's going to implode)). I think that with some time they would figure out how to work together, more or less, and they would have a pretty stable partnership.

Idk how to end this. I just thought it would be a fun idea and suddenly i blacked out and woke up with a small esay in front of me. I hope you enjoyed this.

[violetisconfused]

Okay okay okay. Hear me out: Apollo x Telemachus.

I know I sound mental rn but it would be REALLY funny, and honestly kinda cute. Like you cannot deny that Telemachus would be Apollo’s type. I fear local pretty young prince is exactly the kinda person Apollo would be like “yeah I’d hit” and Tel would honestly probably go from “why is this god talking to me so often?” to “wait is he flirting with me?” to “wait but I don’t like men… but like Apollo’s kinda cute… wait no!” to “okay so maybe I like men but do I wanna get involved with a god?” pipeline of self discovery era all because the god of archery and music came down and started flirting one day

Athena is VERY unimpressed with her half brother for this one of course 😔 she is in fact their biggest hater (Ody is close in second he wants Apollo AWAY from his child)

Penelope and Hermes are very supportive of the relationship though. Penelope more in a “as long as you’re happy and he doesn’t hurt you or get you hurt I’m fine with it” way. Hermes though, he actively encouraged Apollo to start flirting with Telemachus to begin with (great grandpa being a wingman to get you set up with a god? More likely than you think)

As for the rest of the Olympians? Zeus is wondering why his existence is haunted by Odysseus and his family, same with Poseidon. Artemis is entirely unsurprised her twin brother has decided to start dating a mortal prince, it’s very on brand for him. Ares couldn’t care less, same with Hephaestus. Aphrodite is actually a big fan only because she can tell that Apollo genuinely likes Telemachus. Hera is indifferent about it but I like to imagine that after God Games she’s a slightly better step mom so she’s relatively supportive of Apollo’s prince rizzing endeavors.

The relationship itself is surprisingly highly functional and really normal despite Apollo being a god. For a long time Telemachus makes an internal vow to himself not to fall in love too much because he’s aware that Apollo tends to switch up on how much he loves his lovers sometimes and doesn’t wanna get hurt but after a very long discussion and Apollo swearing he’s serious about this (like Hyacinth levels of serious about this. Bro is LOCKED IN) and after staying up literally all night thinking about it Telemachus decides to seriously give this a chance and stop acting weird and it goes extremely well actually. They hang out daily, usually in like the woods or something or down by the shore where there isn’t anybody around simply because neither of them really wanna deal with other people knowing they’re together. It isn’t because either one is ashamed of the other or anything, just simply wanting privacy and knowing they wouldn’t get that with Telemachus being prince and Apollo being a literal god so people would probably just be staring the whole time.

Apollo also gives Telemachus gifts like crazy. He’ll write him love poems and songs all the time and is always equally as excited to show him every time (Telemachus is always just as excited to hear it because he’s never had anyone love him like this before)

Now the funniest part of this whole thing: the era where Apollo is trying to woo Telemachus. He 100% used serenading but stopped after Odysseus tried to shoot him with an arrow (to be fair it was the 10th time Apollo was outside the palace singing so the attempted shooting was pretty valid. Ody wanted his sleep)

Then Apollo started bugging Athena and tagging along with her whenever she’d visit the royal family (she knew what he was trying to do but there’s no stopping Apollo once he wants to woo somebody. Not for a lack of obvious hating though. Very actively hates on his flirting. Apollo is extremely un-subtle with his flirting too which makes it even funnier because 9/10 Telemachus just runs away because he’s never been flirted with before

Then after the flirting just turns into Telemachus avoiding Apollo at all costs (Telemachus is in his questioning his romantic attraction era during this but ofc Apollo doesn’t know this) Apollo just starts leaving love poems once a week (this goes on for about a month so four poems in total).

Then yk as I said before Telemachus decides to give it a shot blah blah blah gay people real they kiss the end 🥳

So yeah there’s me explaining my crackship. It’s essentially just: “Apollo likes pretty boys and Telemachus is a (very awkward) pretty boy”

[leclercloml]

Blaugrana Girl | PG8

pairing: pedri gonzalez x modric!reader

summary: barcelona's golden boy and La Liga's starboy, who've been single for a while and have finally started dating someone, and that someone turns out to be none other than the daughter of the famous midfielder of their biggest rival and the 2018 Ballon d'Or winner, Luka Modric.

genre: SMAU

warnings: google translated spanish and croatian, grammar mistakes i guess, incorrect match dates (to match the storyline)

author's note: I can't believe this is my first time doing a footballer fic even though football is my favourite sport alongside f1, anyways hope you guys like it

ynmodric

liked by judebellingham , lukamodric10 , pedri and 4,789,629 others

ynmodric 🕶️🤍

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lukamodric10 moja prekrasna kćer 🤍 (my gorgeous daughter)

⤷ynmodric Hvala ti dad 🫶🏻 (thank you dad)

⤷username THE father and daughter duo.

toni.kr8s hermosa chica 😊🤍 (beautiful girl)

⤷ynmodric gracias, tío!! (thanks uncle)

⤷username she's basically daughter of every older player in rm 😭😭😭

⤷username it's adorable 😭🫶🏻

username she's so iconic for being a culer, I love her sm.

⤷username yeah the fact that her dad is a madrid legend but she's a culer makes it 10× funnier

⤷username she's a culer?

⤷username yupp, Luka said it himself in post match interview against barca "yeah we won, my daughter might be very sad, since she likes barcelona more"

username she's an icon, she's a legend and she is the moment.

username she's so beautiful 😭😭

username her fashion sense tho>>>>

fedevalverde Eres tan genial, ¿ser mi amigo? (You're so cool, be my friend?)

⤷ynmodric no.

⤷rodrygogoes 😂🫵🏻

⤷username rodryyyy 😭😭😭

⤷username i love these three so much 😭

username wifey.

ynmodric

liked by judebellingham, toni.kr8s , pedri and 2,749,730 others

yourinstagram no I still haven't forgave him for 2 goals against us but I guess he's kinda cool.

view comments

judebellingham I have apologised 10 times already.

⤷ynmodric yes, and I do not forgive you, and that win was beginners luck

⤷username what a bitch hating on the team her father play for and calling our rivals "us" ungrateful bastards.

⤷username WOAH calm your horses, it's all joke when Luka, Jude and other madrid guys don't mind it, why is it bothering you sm, a lot of players kid support their dad's/mom's rivals, it's common in football world chill.

⤷username "ungreatful bastard" bro she is literally the most grateful person ever.

⤷username chill out, it's all joke and just because she supports barca doesn't mean she's "ungreatful".

username i love the mad madridistas in comments, cry more.

⤷username no but imagine hating on someone just because they don't support your favourite lmfao.

username Jude x y/n 👀

⤷username say another word and I'll finna throw hands

username pedri you ain't slick with that like.

⤷username homeboy thinking he can pull her.

⤷username he's can tho-

⤷username he can but I don't think Jude will miss his chance

⤷username this is exactly what I hate, she would post just one player and the shipping is there, first with Valverde (he literally had a girlfriend) and then Rodrygo and now Jude, can you all just stop?

⤷username fr fr, like her dad plays for that club, it's obvious she's gonna be friends with the players around her age and by these shippings you all are just ruining their friendship.

username pedri liked.....

⤷username he likes all of her posts...and vice versa....

⤷username and she's a culer....

⤷username yeah we know she's a culer you don't need to mention it every 2 seconds.

⤷username yeah you're right but she's a culer 🤷🏻‍♀️

⤷username lmao 😭

⤷username Luka wouldn't like that

⤷username did he told you that?

username ok but why do I ship.

⤷username kys.

⤷username STRAIGHT to the point 💀

username alright can we stop talking about jude and pedri and talk about HER like she look so beautiful.

⤷username oh my god finally! Everyone is just "oh Jude and y/n i ship" , "oh pedri in the likes, I ship" NO! it ain't about them, it's about y/n.

⤷username she so fucking gorgeous

username mother. (she's 19)

username y/n i would lick the floor you walk on.

⤷username WOAH! now calm down there.

username new friendship at bernabeu

username beautiful!

pedri

liked by pablogavi , _rl9 , ynmodric and 56,739,428 others

pedri força barça ye FUERZA TENERIFE!! 💪🏻💔🏝️

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pablogavi vamos hermano!! (Let's go brother!!)

⤷pedri Muchas gracias hermano ❤️. (Thank you so much bro)

⤷username brothers 😭😭🫶🏻🫶🏻

⤷username THE golden boys.

⤷username i love them your honour

_rl9 eras increíble pequeño (you were incredible little one)

liked by pedri

⤷username ahhhhh they're literally a family

⤷username mes que un club 💙❤️

username pedri potter 🎩🪄

username he's baaackkkk

username you were amazing pedri! Praying for tenerife 🫶🏻

username força pedri y fuerza tenerife!

adidas magician 🪄

⤷username adidas admin is just like us fr.

ynmodric incredible performance! praying for tenerife 🇮🇨❤️

⤷pedri muchas gracias y/n, realmente lo aprecio ❤️ (thank you so much y/n, i really appreciate it)

⤷username ajssvakdbsnkshdksdj yes yes yes

⤷username screaming!!!!!

⤷username she have commented on Lewy's acc multiple times but this is the first time she have commented on Pedri's post, we're winning!!!

⤷username the red heart 😭😭😭

⤷username y/n baby come back home.

⤷username am I dreaming???

⤷username they'll be the power couple.

username y/n's comment is gonna make a lot of madristas mad 😭😭

⤷username who even cares about them.

username vamos pedri!!! Visca barca!

ynmodric

tenerife, canary islands, spain

liked by judebellingham, vinijr, pedri and 2,749,825 others

ynmodric no fire could ever burn the beauty of this place 🏝️

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username she's so beautiful wtf

username y/n adopt me please.

vinijr hope you're enjoying your vacation 🏝️

⤷ynmodric very much 🌚

⤷username excuse me? What's that emoji supposed to mean?

username canary islands?? TENERIFE??!!

⤷username what's wrong with canary islands?

⤷username nothing it's just she's in Tenerife!

⤷username yeah well then what's wrong with tenerife?

⤷username you're joking right? You do know who's from tenerife?

⤷username who?

⤷username pedri, the barca midfielder.

⤷username excuse me???!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK??

judebellingham spending summer alone? Might be boring af.

⤷ynmodric who said I was alone?

⤷username HELLO??? JUDE, VINI WHAT DO YOU BOTH KNOW?

⤷username WHOEVER is with MY wife, leave.

⤷username see I'm not trying to be delusional and all shit but whenever someone mention canaries or tenerife the only person i could think of is Pedri 😭

⤷username THEY would break the football internet.

⤷username i can already imagine the headlines 😭

username oh my god this was not on my 2023 bingo card.

username i always shipped them so.

⤷username me too 😭😭

username imagine pedri posting himself in canary islands after this

⤷username lmfao that would be iconic.

pedri

tenerife, canary islands, spain

liked by pablogavi , _ferminlopez, ynmodric and 26,739,198 others

pedri summer break 🏝️

view comments

username ALRIGHT WHAT THE FUCK, PEDRO GONZALEZ LOPEZ, WHO GAVE YOU RIGHTS TO COME ON INSTAGRAM HALF NAKED??

username the muscles I'm on my knees.

username I PREDICTED IT! NO ONE CAN SAY OTHER WISE.

⤷username predicted what?

⤷username go check y/n modric's post, her and pedri are spending summer vacation together !!!

⤷username I JUST DID HELLO??!! SOMEONE EVEN COMMENTED SAYING "imagine pedri posting himself in canary islands after this" and he did 😭!!

⤷username he saw the comments and went like "alr let's give you all what you want" icon fr. 😭

pablogavi I wonder when was the last time I saw that location on a post 🤔.

⤷pedri keep wondering.

⤷username under y/n's post!!!

liked by pablogavi

⤷username he liked!!!

⤷username they're together 😭

⤷username Jude punching the air rn

⤷username they were just friends.

⤷username pedri and y/n THE power couple

username if they ever had kids yk the midfield genes are gonna be crazy

⤷username they've not even confirmed their relationship yet and you're already talking about kids 😭😭

username this is MY roman empire

_ferminlopez looking good hermano 😉

⤷username HE KNOWS.

username this was not on my 2023 bingo card

⤷username same 😭

⤷username it was on no one's 😭😭

username SO WE CAN SEE Y/N WEARING A BARCA JERSEY???

⤷username never

Twitter

Instagram

ynmodric

liked by pedri , judebellingham, vinijr and 3,638,629 others

ynmodric it was supposed to be a surprise or soft launch or whatever but y'all are literal Sherlock Holmes, so here it is, the love of my life, the most precious thing to me, MY beautiful boyfriend, te amo bebe ❤️ (AND don't worry y'all dad approves)

tagged; pedri

view comments

pedri was the last pic really necessary???

⤷ynmodric what? you look cute!!!

⤷vinijr you really do 😹

⤷username lmao 😭

⤷username divided by rivalry united by y/n

⤷username el clasico gonna be more fun now

pedri te amo mucho ❤️

⤷ynmodric te amo mucho también❤️

_ferminlopez we're not sherlock holmes, you both are just stupid.

⤷ynmodric OK rude.

⤷pablogavi he's right tho, you both made it so obvious 💀

⤷pedri go away, both of you.

⤷username I'M DYING 😭

⤷username i mean they're not wrong, they both made it so obvious

lukamodric10 where did you get that picture from???

⤷ynmodric I have my ways don't worry.

⤷username I'm speechless.

pedri mi mujer 🫶🏻 (my woman)

⤷ynmodric yours only 🤍

⤷rodrygogoes gross 🤢

⤷ynmodric go away hater.

fedevalverde hermoso 😍 (beautiful)

⤷ynmodric thank you fed, but why tf do you comment like a 30 year old aunt.

⤷fedvalverde I do not??

⤷username you do 😭

⤷username I'm sorry valverde but you do 😭😭

username LUKA'S PIC I'M DYING, SHE'S SO ICONIC 😭

⤷ynmodric I mean you guys were so worried about his reaction and all stuff so

⤷username AHHHHHH!!!! SHE REPLIED

⤷username you won 😭

username Y/N IS WEARING A BARCA JERSEY, IN A MATCH!!?? WHY DIDN'T ANY OF US SAW THIS BEFORE

⤷ynmodric I'm surprised you sherlock people didn't found out earlier, guess i outsmarted you all.

⤷username outsmarted us fr fr

username they're the IT couple

username pedri you better treat my woman right or else 🤺

⤷username stop you're embarrassing.

⤷username 💀💀💀

lukamodric10 sviđa mi se, dobar je dečko 🤍(I like him, he's a good guy)

⤷ynmodric zaista je vrlo simpatičan (he indeed is very likeable)

⤷judebellingham @/pedri you have the approval from big man

⤷pedri appreciate it 🤍

⤷username never in my 1000 year of life i would've thought that barca players and real madrid players would have this kind of interaction

⤷username me too girl me too

pedri te amo ❤️

⤷ynmodric Yo también te amo ❤️

pedri

liked by ynmodric, pablogavi, _rl9 and 38,839,327 others

pedri my no. 1 fan aka the love of my life, te amo mucho ❤️

tagged; ynmodric

view comments

ynmodric proud to be the no.1 of the most perfect boy known to mankind

⤷pedri hi this is fer, pedri just throw his phone across the wall and started sprinting in the entire house

⤷ynmodric help what 😭😭

⤷pedri not true!!!

⤷feeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrr he's blushing like a school girl

⤷ynmodric he do look very pretty with those pink tint on his cheeks

⤷feeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrr he died, dead.

⤷username this have to be the cutest most adorable-st and funniest reply chain I've ever read.

⤷username pedri is whipped 😭

pablogavi i had to watch you both make out infront of me to get that picture and in return i get no pic credits????

⤷pedri it's not about you.

⤷pablogavi it should be.

⤷ynmodric 📸; angry bird

⤷pablogavi I am not???!!!

⤷pedri you are

⤷ferrantorres you are

⤷_ferminlopez you are

⤷judebellingham you are

⤷vinijr you are

⤷username not Jude 😭😭😭

⤷username my man played 1 match against him and already looked devastated 😭

⤷username divide by rivalry united by yn and pedri

⤷username that rhymes 😭😭

username this is the most iconic thing ever happened after 18.12.22

ynmodric mi amorrrrr ❤️

⤷pedri ❤️❤️❤️

⤷username cutiesss 😭😭

ynmodric fuck it, imma pull a frenkie, 👵🏻❤️👴🏻

⤷pedri lmfao😭

⤷mikkykiemeny stop 😭😭

⤷frenkiedejong what's wrong with that emoji??!

⤷ynmodric absolutely NOTHING 🫶🏻!

⤷username she's so fucking iconic!!!

⤷username my favourite wags.

username they're literally the cutest and the best couple ever

username they're an absolutely icon

username do you want real love or do you just want what they have.... what's the difference actually??

username bro scoring on and off pitch

ynmodric Te amo mucho mi amor ❤️ (i love you so much my love)

⤷pedri Yo también te amo mucho mi amor❤️🫶🏻!!(I love you so much too mi amor)

⤷username GOD IT'S ME AGAIN

username they're the best fr

username i love them your honour.

[rollinouttahere-writes]

Aaaa I'm glad you liked my rambling couple of headcanons!! The image of reader and cora just in the background while law is doing his scary surgeon of death thing cheering him on and offering potential new crewmates is so funny actually. And I agree there is nothing funnier to me than the idea of getting forced to join a pirate crew like doflamingo's just because you have a vague amount of childcare experience and were nice to a couple kids. I'm obsessed with baby dellinger (I know you haven't met him but he slays) and I like the idea of reader thinking his sharp teethies and horns are adorable and just kind of rolling with their new job and baby talking a bloodied toddler dellinger lmao. Maybe reader is a bit more deranged than everyone thought!

Yeah thank you for sending it in, it's a very fun AU to play with! I thought about it way too much at work today, so I'm dumping all of those random thoughts into this.

I've seen pictures of Dellinger, so I know who you're talking about.

Angel has a tendency to baby all of the kids, so of course that's going to apply to the actual baby. She's always cooing over how cute his little horns and teeth are. Even when he's being a terror, she's excusing everything with: he's literally a baby. You got bit? Well why were you putting your hand so close to his mouth? He isn't even walking yet. If you're getting injured by him, that's just a skill issue on your part. Angel doting on him so much turns him into a major mama's boy.

Anyways onto my random ideas

Angel and Corazon's first interaction is a trainwreck because it happened after Angel saw him chuck Law out a window. Her first order of business is to go get Law and treat him, but the second she's done, she's out for blood. By the time she tracks down Corazon, she's so mad that she grabs the back of his coat and yanks on it so hard that she actually manages to make him fall flat on his ass. The instant he's down, she's grabbing him by the collar and laying into him like, "You are a grown ass man! In what fucking universe do you think it's okay for you to throw one of my kids out of a window?! Law is already sick, and now you're trying to kill him too?! If you so much as look at him again, I'll skin you alive and turn you into a coat!" She shoves him as she leaves, and Corazon just sits there in stunned silence because that was actually terrifying. He thought she was just a nanny, he didn't know she was capable of that. Doflamingo saw the whole thing and it just makes him like Angel more. Maybe she isn't so different from the rest of them after all.

Doflamingo gets all of the kids (excluding Law's stubborn ass) to call Angel 'mom'. Partially because he's so hung up on his whole family shtick, but mostly as a manipulation tactic to guilt trip her into not wanting to leave.

When it's time for Corazon and Law to leave, Angel promises to meet up with them when it's time to go. She says she has some last minute packing to do and will be right back. The "packing" is just smuggling the kids out in a crate (except for Dellinger who just gets stuffed in a purse because he's so tiny) because there isn't a chance in hell that she's leaving her kids to get raised by Doflamingo. Now Law has two embarrassing parents and also three siblings to annoy the hell out of him. He suffers even in the good AUs.

Doflamingo is irate when he realizes what happened and where like half of his damn family went. The betrayal is the worst part, but he's also pissed because he was starting to have a thing for Angel and he's mad that she's with his brother and not him.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

IOTA Reviews: Migration

You know, for a while, I thought Luka was one of the smartest characters in the show, and the fact that he's hightailing it out of Paris in this episode only continues to prove my point.

Let's get into the thirteenth episode of Miraculous Ladybug's fifth season: Migration

We start off with Marinette running over to the Liberty (with her friends laughing behind her back like the supportive people they are) and tries to talk with Luka about her relationship with Adrien once they're in private. Luka is pretty supportive, and it's a nice scene. Marinette then bumps into Adrien, who also wants to talk with Luka, and while the two try to get unstuck, we get a nice visual of Luka seeing the two as Ladybug and Cat Noir, which is there to remind the audience that he's known who both of them are ever since “Wishmaker”.

Adrien then talks to Luka about how he's worried something is keeping Marinette from being honest about her feelings. Luka gives him some advice on how just because he doesn't know everything about Marinette, it doesn't make her feelings for him less valid, and vice versa.

After Adrien leaves, we get an appearance from everyone's favorite deadbeat dad, Jagged Stone. He asks Luka how he can be a better father like he didn't miss years of child support, but all Luka really says is that he needs to spend time with his damn family. Of course, what I like about this scene is that it avoids the usual narrative pitfall of trying to say that Jagged and Anarka, Luka's mom, should get back together, and instead shows Jagged developing feelings for his agent, Penny.

Speaking of, after Jagged leaves, Penny comes in to come to Luka for advice. Okay, is Luka just the Dr. Phil of this show's universe? Penny talks to Luka about her sudden feelings for Jagged Stone.

Penny: No, I don't know why I'm in love with your father. He's disorganized, childish, selfish, and musically speaking, he's no David Bowie. Truth be told, your dad's a walking disaster. So why do I love him?

Luka: Does he make you happy, Penny?

Penny: Yeah. I just can't figure out why!

It's almost like this show will randomly pair people up at the drop of a hat. But hey, at least Luka hasn't asked if Kagami is single yet.

Before Penny leaves, Bob Roth, Jagged's producer, demands to know where he is, as he needs to record a new album. Bob learns that Jagged had children with Anarka (ignoring the potential scandal it could create), so Anarka promptly throws him out of the boat in a scene that I'm pretty sure is meant to be a reference to that one running gag from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air.

Either way, Jazz's scream was funnier.

Kitty Section then practices their latest song about how you don't have to be rich, because even the songs in this show aren't exactly subtle with their messages. Bob somehow gets back on the Liberty completely dry, and offers the band a contract.

Bob: How would you like to sign a contract with me?

Luka: Actually, Bob, you already offered to sign us... Marinette: And you never followed up. Did you forget?

Bob: Huh? Uh... of course! I remember! I was just waiting for the right reason—uh, I mean, the right time! I was waiting for the right time to have you guys sign the contract!

My God, even the characters in this show want to forget it used to have good episodes.

Anarka throws Bob off again, where she and Luka talk about how everyone deserves a second chance and that change is possible.

Yeah, funny how that message almost never came up with Chloe, Lila, and Felix last season, isn't it? And given that they're going to use Bob as an example of this lesson, I don't think it's going to be a positive one. So right after Luka generously decided to give Bob a second chance, Bob offers them a new contract to sign... and as soon as he does, he screws them all over thanks to a lot of fine print they didn't stop to read.

Ivan: He can fire us whenever he wants?

Bob: Yep, and I just did, by the way.

Rose: The name Kitty Section belongs to him?!

Bob: Yep. It’s ugly, but it’s mine. Marinette: He owns everything you’ve made and will make over the next thousand years!? Bob: Gotta cover all bases.

Zoe: Marinette's costumes, the music video Nino shot, the website Mylene runs...

Bob: All mine!

Adrien: And you can’t even start another band together?

Bob: Course not, that’d be unfair competition! EVERYTHING belongs to me! Everything you are, everything you say, everything that’s in your hearts belongs to me!

See, kids? This is why you should never trust bad people. It doesn't matter if they say they want to improve. They just want to trick you and ruin your life, so if you're ever wronged by anyone, that person is never able to redeem themselves, especially if they're rich. As we all know, rich people are far worse than insane supervillains who want to rewrite reality. Just ask the biggest monster in the show, Chloe Bourgeois.

So yeah, Luka's optimism being taken advantage of is enough to attract the attention of Monarch, who attempts to akumatize him into Silencer again. Monarch realizes that Luka knows Ladybug and Cat Noir's identities (why he didn't think to look into it, given Viperion's powers, is left unanswered), and angrily smashes his guitar to free himself of Monarch's influence.

So not only did he stop himself from getting akumatized, he's also one step closer to becoming a true rock star.

Somehow, Bob thinks only keeping Luka on board would mean he wouldn't hate him, but Luka isn't buying it. Bob is shocked that Luka wouldn't want to work for an asshole like him as Luka tears the contract in half, but Bob has backups. Monarch decides to settle on Bob instead, akumatizing him into Gold Record.

Gold Record's design is... okay. It's still better than Sole Destroyer, and it's definitely better than Moolak. The gold coloring looks nice, and the euro symbol on the record is a nice visual. His powers are pretty much just a combination of Pixelator, the Collector, and Truth's powers, transforming people into records who sing their true feelings while using the Horse Miraculous' Voyage to throw the records into space. Nothing too original there, but it's a good metaphor for sleazy music producers, and it works for this story.

Rose and Anarka are the first of Gold Record's victims, and in a hurry, Luka lets Adrien know he knows he's Cat Noir, giving him a place to hide. Just as Juleka is hit by Gold Record, Ladybug and Cat Noir arrive on the scene. While Cat Noir holds off Gold Record, Ladybug tries to come up with a plan.

Ladybug summons her Lucky Charm, getting a knitting needle. She realizes her plan will need to involve using Luka as bait. Luka is forced to reveal that he knows who Ladybug and Cat Noir are, and what will happen if Gold Record gets him, setting up a tough choice that will force Ladybug to rethink her plan... and then the next scene happens, where Luka lets himself get hit, where Ladybug manages send Gold Record's record flying with a makeshift bow and arrow created from the knitting needle and a nearby fiddle, which Cat Noir immediately Cataclysms.

Ladybug de-evilizes the Akuma, uses Miraculous Ladybug to fix the damage, and gives Bob Roth a Magical Charm that even he knows is useless at this point. Ladybug and Cat Noir decide to call it a day and let Anarka throw Bob Roth out again.

Luka reveals that he knows Ladybug and Cat Noir's identities (because once again, sharing that information with your friends is totally fine for some reason), and that he can't stay in Paris. After revealing that he had Fang eat all of Bob's contracts so Luka isn't bound by them anymore, Jagged offers to take Luka around the world to finally make up for years of absence while Luka makes Juleka the new leader of Kitty Section. And so the episode ends with the Couffaine family sharing a hug while Luka gives one last look to his friends Marinette and Adrien.

This episode was just average, all things considered. The plot and the lesson it was setting out to teach, while not terrible, felt a little tacked on. It was if the writers were trying to acknowledge the stuff that happened with Chloe and wanted to show an example of redemption arc done right in the case of Jagged. It falls flat because once again, more focus is given to showing how easy it is to be screwed over trusting someone than showing the benefits to trusting someone, especially since Bob is already an outlandish villain we already have a lot of reasons to hate.

I'm also mixed on the handling of Luka here. While I'm glad Marinette isn't being forced to learn a lesson here, I don't get why Luka had to be the one to be taken advantage of. He's already aware of how easy it is for Monarch to learn his secrets, so it feels weird that he lets himself and his friends get taken advantage of so easily. Outside of the scene with Ladybug's Lucky Charm, I don't get why he needed to tell the others the stuff he knew. I can sort of see why he'd tell Adrien, but why would he think telling his friends he knows who Ladybug and Cat Noir are wouldn't endanger them too?

Speaking of that, despite being established for almost an entire season, we really don't see enough of Marinette and Adrien reacting to Luka revealing that he knows who they are. Marinette only gets a few lines, and Adrien doesn't even get to say anything. While I am glad that Marinette and Adrien aren't dominating the plot for once, it feels weird that we don't get to see their reactions to something so shocking, especially with how often the identity rule has been enforced.

On the other hand, the writing is still handled a lot better than usual. I like how Monarch chooses to change his strategy to focus on Luka halfway through the episode, and the idea of the risk using Luka for Ladybug's plan brings is an interesting one, even if they don't really go anywhere with it. The running gag with Bob constantly getting thrown off the Liberty is a funny one, and it proves you can actually write slapstick that doesn't involve humiliating Marinette. Who knew?

As a whole, while I think this is the best episode of the season so far, this episode still has its fair share of problems.

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS... LUKA

Not counting the time Marinette got the award in my review of the Shanghai Special, we have the first character this season to get the Biggest Idiot Award twice. For someone who is usually smarter than the other characters, Luka made quite a few bad choices this episode. He decided to trust Bob Roth after he screwed him and his friends over in “Silencer”, he didn't think to read the contract he was offered, and after being endangered by what Monarch knows now, he decided to tell his friends and family that he knows who Ladybug and Cat Noir are, potentially putting them all in danger too. Yeah, the next few episodes will probably just ignore it, but there's always a chance Monarch could try another Optigami, even if he doesn't have the Peacock Miraculous anymore.

And with that, I'm officially done with the first half of Season 5. What do I think of it? Well, I think Immortan Joe said it best:

Yeah, this season was pretty boring, all things considered. To be perfectly honest, I struggled here more than I did last season because I wasn't sure what to say about half of the episodes I watched. There was almost nothing of substance these past thirteen episodes, and I could barely say anything other than “this episode is okay” or “this episode is bad”. Whenever I had ideas, they were usually extensions to things I've already talked about, like the Marinette angst, the historical and cultural inaccuracies, and the villains genuinely being incompetent. If you showed someone a few episodes of Season 1 and this season, outside of Monarch's new appearance, it'd be pretty hard for them to tell the difference.

But hey, maybe things will pick up in the second half of the season. Hell, maybe the next episode will be even better than this one, and... huh. Does anyone else hear an ominous whistling in the background?

[defectivefanboy]

Hey there! I’ve read a few of your posts now and I truly enjoy your writing, you’re very good at it ^^

I was wondering if I could request an Alastor x gender neutral reader who is similar to Beetlejuice (personality and power wise). Like, how did he feel about them at first? And how did it progress into more of a relationship.

If not, that’s completely alright! I hope you have a great rest of your day <3

~ 🕷️🕸️

yessir!! this is actually the first time (and second for good measure) that I watched Beetlejuice fully through.

I was wondering if I could request an Alastor x gender neutral reader who is similar to Beetlejuice (personality and power wise). Like, how did he feel about them at first? And how did it progress into more of a relationship.

Overall notes: Stories written on this blog are GN until specified. While this story uses they/them pronouns, and I don't mind female readers on my blog, I do not write for y'all, and if you are a fetishizer fuck off????????????????? ew.

C/W: Cursing, Mentions of Pervertedness, its Beetlejuice, You're canonical Jesus Christ /j, or am I?, Dark humor, Possessive Alastor, Mentions of Bite marks, Dirt ball reader, just reader being gross here and there, nothing too much, youre Beetlejuice, reader has universal rizz

Notes: If you read the C/W warnings it was real late leave me alone. you'll understand when you get there. writing this my mind kept straying and just wanted to write Alastor love because god holy fuck I love him. Im an actual slut for domestic alastor I could write him all day.

The Radio Show...

Oh he's truly interested in you. Not remotely romantic or even platonically, but he is interested (at least at first)

Lets be real quick, he knows hes in hell, but what IN the hell is he looking at.

And what was that outfit you were wearing??? Did you just get out of prison prom???

But your first meeting with him was... interesting to say the least

But then again I think all your interactions are interesting (always more, never less)

But damn. He just had to think the 'sinner' was new to hell and could easily get a quick bite

Poor Alastor really thought the 'sinner' that looked around hell like a lost child as he strolled up with his uncanny smile

Last thing he expected was a jumpy, sporadic, and unfortunately a bit more then a little bit of a pervert.

The record stopped more than a few time at your comments–- Sorry Alastor.

And it had only been a few minutes of meeting you (rip)

And to be honest with you. come here. little closer

He did not know what in all of hell you were trying to pitch to him

He couldn't even get a word in with how fast you talked

And how many voices you did, you basically had a conversation to yourself.

"Ghost can't even scare humans away anymore, pfft. Can't you believe that shit. The last jack offs wouldn't even call me, I had to get some human girl to do it. Is it weird it happened twice? Second time her mom was dead! Gets funnier each time."

Oh?

Humans?

Now you have his interest

And you were able to travel to the human world

"So you're a hell born demon then, correct?" Alastor asked quirking a brow at the questionable individual in front of him, who quickly stopped talking to, well, themselves and snapped their head to him. They seemed to had just gotten here... or gotten back, as their clothes were slightly tussled and their hair was flying everywhere

With a quick dusting of your clothes you straightened your posture. Clearing your throat you spoke in a flat monotone voice. "Well, no actually, uhm, I was born in a manger inside of a barn, my mother, was a virgin and my step father Jospeh was a real piece of work let me tell you that. Died for your sins, y'know, should be thanking me."

This is the first time the radio show had gone radio silent... before he walked away.

Alastor had met a lot of demons, probably killed even more.

Hell he has even put up with that horny spider, but this was the first time he had to take a breather from another sinner? demon? enigma?

But damn it all to hell, he was curious

He had been for so long and he had only interacted with lower hellborn demons.

The occasional Goetia or hell royal would make a public appearance, but that that was all.

Never had he interacted with someone who went from hell to the human world on the daily

The first few meetings he truly tried to keep his distance, keyword tried

But you can only keep a person who teleports around at a distance for some long

Though it to end in you being pushed back by his microphone when you got a bit too close on accident more often then not

But overall he enjoys each of your meetings, enjoy being used loosely

He was more interested in the ever changing world of humans

You only get as knowledgeable of the new world as it comes in, but you have to find them

So having a way to always keep updated he truly enjoyed.

He kinda saw you as, well, while he would say a mole, as you get him information

Not that you honestly realize, you kinda just talk about random shit

He sees you as well, as uh, ahem...

"Quite the squirrelly fellow you are, aren't you?" He quipped with a smile on his face. The both of you walking along one of the many roads of hell as you talked about your latest excursion to the human world. Giving him a confused look you gave him a side eye a you spoke. "Now, what do you mean by that, hm? I don't storage tree nuts in my cheeks, I storage metal nuts in them." Taking your hand you drug into your cheek and pulled out a rusted nut before offering it to him. In which he squatted away with his microphone.

"No."

Alastor in or out of a relationship now seems like the calm one out of the pair whenever you two are together

And he always has a tilt to his head whenever he's with you as if he's always curious about your next move (well bc he honestly is)

Getting into a relationship is simple to him, but not to you.

He had to explain a few times (many times) to you that you two were on a date while out. Thank the lord he has more patience then he let's on

Truly he's only patient with you after learning he'll get no where either way

He tried threatening at one point, but it didn't work when you tried getting him to work for you in the human world.

Spoiler alert: that also didn't work

Alastor did tried to ask you out in a traditional way. Taking you to dinner, albeit at a cannibal restaurant, he really didn't know what you ate

He was disgusted when he found out, almost gagged, had to take a moment for himself

But he tried asking you out in a nice, classy, quiet place.

Spoiler again: didnt work

His question when right over your head.

"Go out? Aren't we already out? What we doing then? How more out do you wanna be? Gotta say though, never been to a place this fancy, must got some walking cash, huh? You know we could start a business together I be the brains, face and you can be..." You droned on as your hand flared around as you spoke. Alastor stared at you as static rumbled from his chest, one eye twitching in annoyance. Sighing he shook his head as he stared with a smile. Maybe you didn't understand what he was asking, or maybe you did. To be honest he doesn't know how much you know, but maybe letting you go on about whatever it is you're planning and get a deal out of you.

Nothing big, just a small pact that you two are "partners."

Cheeky Bastard.

He did tell you eventually someday, he's not heartless

Don't mention that it was after he had convinced you to move in his home (or apartment?? he staying at the hotel?? like??)

But it's another story for getting you to take a shower or a bath.

While Alastor isn't a clean freak or anything he much rather keep his house clean and smell free.

Alastor had quite a few sleepiness nights when you decided to sneak into his bed without a shower.

He almost banned you from the house until you agreed to take a shower after 'work'

now onto the good part

While he doesnt enjoy physical touch from anyone, only part taking in it when he's making someone uncomfortable

He settled on the fact you were gonna keep making every effort to get into his personal space

You only found out he enjoyed having you near him when your items from the guest room you had been staying in were now in his room

Be it having a hand placed on the middle of your back or letting you fiddle with his fingers as you talk

He always finds a way to get a touch in on a daily basis

What can he say? he likes to have a hold on what's his

That's another thing

He's a possessive lover, or person in general but ignore that right now

He just doesn't understand

Why do you have so much rizz

Both sinners and hell born demons seem to love you

And he hates it

Loathes it

If we wanted to get Nsfw real quick

He likes to leave bites and marks on you so even humans know where you belong <3

Going back to sfw

On the outside, beyond the walls of his home. He's well, he's Alastor

Cunning, Cruel, and Evil

But inside? .......Hey Siri, can you domestic a deer?

We already know he enjoys cooking, his mothers recipes are always a hit. He does have to convince you to eat something if it's new.

But he's decently domestic within the comfort of his own walls. As domestic as he can be will a feral dog in his home now. At least you're potty trained, right? Right??

He always enjoyed being alone, especially when he needed a break.

But as weird as it was for the first few months

Going to bed alone in a quiet home, everything neat and orderly was always a treat for the

just to wake up to a god awful mess like a hurricane had hit only the inside of the house.

Thankfully he's unable to fully freak out when he feels the weight of a body laying on him.

Arms wrapped securely in place as he moved around trying to view the full scope of the mess.

The look of defeat only rested on his face for a moment before he was pulled down by striped arms.

"What are staring at, red?..." You said half asleep as you pulled on the back up his shirt collar. "it's still too early to worry about the mess. Come back to bed" He gently shook his head in disgust opening his mouth to speak before getting cut off by a strong pull of his shirt. "I was setting up... sandworm traps. Couldn't't let them get my dearest deer." Alastor gave you a questioning look wanting to ask, but knowing better not too.

Sighing he let himself relax back into the comforter and wrap his arms loosely around as you laid right back on top of him. One of his hands softly treaded through your messy hair causing you to sigh and melt into his body. It was a quiet few moments until he had a passing thought.

"Wait... deer with an A, correct? Correct??"

He wasn't getting an answer from you anytime soon...

[lunatic-fandom-space]

You know what its past midnight Im gonna make a post critisising acotar despite never having the read the series, the only book of SJMs ive actually read was crescent city but I spend a lot of time in anti acotar circles bc its fun being a little hater sometimes and I think I know enough by now to atleast critise some of the themes. I definitely know more about this series than I should, like I know about that immortal horse whose horse wife tragically died in horse childbirth and then Im pretty sure he died of horse sadness. And yet, despite cari can read being pretty good at explaining magic shit, I still dont know what the hell syphons are or why illyrians have them or why they matter so you really never stop learning huh

Anyway, I wanted to talk about the misogyny within the universe of acotar because its really bad, both in the sense that its just annoying and insufferable to read about even second-hand and in the sense that its badly written. The thing that inspired this was this short piece of flashfiction by @feynessupremacy about an unnamed girl from the hewn city being married off and having a horrible time living in this endless cycle of misogynistic abuse that her mom is still in and that her dauggters will end up in, all powerless to do anything against this kind of systemic sexism. I thought it was good and made its intended point pretty well but it also made me once again realize how borderline comical this series portrayal of misogyny is

Like, okay, once again, I have not read these books myself but it very much seems like the sexism in this world just materialized in the second book, from the summaries Ive watched it straightup seems like it was just not there in the first book. I mean hell, the entire plot hinges on the fact that Tamlin was sending all these fae disguised as fucked up creatures out so that they would hopefully be killed by a woman so she could break the curse, which implies that women being hunters was pretty normal. (Also, dont come at me with any kind of "oh, it doesnt specify the gender of the person who needs to break the curse a guy couldve done it as well", sjm is too insufferably heteronormative to consider that)

So basically what Im saying is, from my perspective it very much seems like sjm put not only systemic misogyny but like, incredibly violent systemic misogyny to the point where women being brutalized is basically completely normal, in her fantasy series for the sake of making a man look good because hes a wittle sad :( about it sometimes which is honestly pretty funny to me

But it gets even funnier because it doesnt even seem like sexism is really a widespread thing ? Like, i have never seen anyone else directly address this but its all I can think about: in the Nightcourt, the misogyny and institutionalized violence against women is literally the worst it possibly can be with genital mutilation and everything and then in the rest of Prythian its just like, not there. There are plenty of women with political power, the queen of adriada comes to mind first, Im pretty sure I read something about a woman from the wintercourt who was in a similar position of power, its unclear to me what all these fuckin priestesses do because theres no focus on the religion at all much less the institution(s) behind that religion, but they have to have some kind of power if theyre anything like priests in our world (although tbh they seem more like nuns to me functionally just with a diffrent name), especially Ianthe who was like a high priestess and directly in charge of Feyre, who shouldve been the most powerful woman in the springcourt by virtue of being with the high lord, Amren and Mor seem to be well respected outside of the NightCourt, their only deity is the MOTHER. Sure, there arent any "official" High Ladies but if being a High Lord entails being chosen by the magic of the land or The Cauldron or The Mother or whatever other kind of magic bullshit and women just dont get to have it for some reason, is that really indicative of the broader culture being sexist, or is that just God, Who Canonically Exists being sexist? Idk about you, but Im leaning towards the latter option

Thats not even mentioning the mortal lands which seem to be ruled by queens exclusively at the time of the story taking place, or Hybern which had Amarantha and I think her sister as well be these high-ranking generals and it wasnt presented as anything unusual. Like, are you telling me that the kingdom whose only value is "we love slavery, we would like to have slavery back" is more progressive than the court of fuckin Feminist King Rhysand?? I Am Going To Turn Into The Joker

Anyway, I think thats all I have to say, please correct me if I got any of this information wrong I cannot stress enough that I have not read these books and dont plan on reading them anytime soon, atleast not in english because reading the term mate a 1000 times sounds like too much for me to bear, atleast in german theyll probably use a term like "Gefährte/in" which doesnt make me think of actual animals

[rpstartersinc]

* 𝐇𝐁𝐎'𝐒  𝐓𝐇𝐄  𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓  𝐎𝐅  𝐔𝐒  /  𝐄𝐏  𝟑,  𝟒  &  𝟓.

feel free to change pronouns / wording!

“ want your jacket back? ”

“ never been in the woods. more bugs than i thought. ”

“ i don’t want your sorries. ”

“ i wasn’t gonna say i’m sorry. ”

“ nobody made you go along with this plan. ”

“ don’t blame me for something that isn’t my fault. ”

“ what are you looking out for? ”

“ is it something lame, like you fell down the stairs or something? ”

“ someone shot at me and missed. ”

“ i gotta grab some stuff i stashed. ”

“ you ask a lot of goddamn questions. ”

“ i had a friend who knew everything about this game. ”

“ there’s this one character named mileena who takes off her mask and she has monster teeth and then she swallows you whole and barfs out your bones! ”

“ ah, getting funnier. ”

“ dude, you got to go up in the sky! ”

“ so everything came crashing down in one day? ”

“ if you have to get bit to be infected, then who bit the first person? ”

“ there’s stuff up there you shouldn’t see. ”

“ well now i have to see. ”

“ whatever it was, think it’s gone. ”

“ dead people can’t be infected. ”

“ it doesn’t get old. ”

“ i’m not infected! ”

“ why did you take that long to answer? ”

“ i thought about lying for some reason, but the reason didn’t come. ”

“ i’m letting you go, so go. ”

“ if i feed you, then every bum you talk to about it is gonna show up here looking for a free lunch. ”

“ you already know i’m bad at lying. ”

“ everything tastes good when you’re starving. ”

“ i know i don’t seem like the type. ”

“ would you stop!? ”

“ paying attention to things, it’s how we show love. ”

“ there are no friends to be had. ”

“ i’ve actually been talking to a nice woman on the radio. ”

“ aren’t i the lucky one? ”

“ i got something to show you. ”

“ i like you older. older means we’re still here. ”

“ i was never afraid before you showed up. ”

“ took most of the night. i’m exhausted. ”

“ i’ve had more good days with you than with anyone else. ”

“ i should be furious. ”

“ you hear anything, you see anything, yell. ”

“ so they’re dead? ”

“ i used to hate the world, and i was happy when everyone died. but i was wrong, because there was one person worth saving. ”

“ we have a job to do, and god help any motherfuckers who stand in our way. ”

“ we can just keep our histories to ourselves. ”

“ you do what i say when i say it. ”

“ they have hot water! i’m taking a shower, and then you’re showering, because seriously - pffff. ”

“ well don’t you look pretty. ”

“ it’s like a spaceship. ”

“ gas breaks down over time, this stuff’s almost water. ”

“ it doesn’t matter how much you push the envelope, it’ll still be stationary. ”

“ what did the mermaid wear to her math class? an algae bra. ”

“ i stayed up all night wondering where the sun went, and then it dawned on me. ”

“ this make you all nostalgic? ”

“ hold your horses, i wanna see what all the fuss is about. ”

“ why are all these pages stuck together? ”

“ can we start a fire? i’m freezing. ”

“ no one’s gonna find us. ”

“ if you don’t think there’s hope for the world, why bother going on? ”

“ i’m not even tired. ”

“ i’m all turned around. ”

“ this is my second day in a fucking car, man! ”

“ you’re not hurt? ”

“ you don’t come out until i say, okay? ”

“ my mom isn’t far, if you could get me to her. ”

“ you can have it. ”

“ you don’t have to! ”

“ i can’t fit through. ”

“ i was alone. ”

“ you were wronged, and i’m sorry. ”

“ they put a gun to my head! ”

“ have i satisfied the necessary conditions for you to talk? ”

“ you think i won’t do it? ”

“ i didn’t hear that guy coming. ”

“ you’re just a kid. ”

“ i know what it’s like, the first time that you hurt someone like that. ”

“ i’m not good at this. ”

“ you shouldn’t have had to, and i’m sorry. ”

“ it wasn’t my first time. ”

“ you put it in your pack, you’ll shoot your damn ass off. ”

“ we’ll get through this. ”

“ let’s just handle what we have to handle. we can deal with this after. ”

“ where would you be without me, huh? ”

“ how did you know it was an ambush? ”

“ i’ve been on both sides. ”

“ we did what we needed to survive. ”

“ did you kill innocent people? ”

“ i don’t want someone sneaking up on us while we’re sleeping. ”

“ i don’t wanna talk about it. ”

“ so it gets easier when you get older? ”

“ did you know diarrhoea is hereditary? yeah, it runs in your jeans. ”

“ you laughed, motherfucker! ”

“ look at me, not at that. ”  

“ i used to be so scared of these people. ”  

“ did it make you feel safe? ”  

“ how does it make you feel now? ”  

“ i swear, i’ve told you everything i know. ”  

“ he won’t be talking. ”  

“ why go to the trouble? you can kill yourself right here. ”

“ do i look scared? ”  

“ i’ve been watching them, i know their patterns. ”  

“ we don’t wanna hurt you, we wanna help you. ”  

“ if i lower my gun, we didn’t hurt you, so you don’t hurt us, right? ”

“ that’s a weird fucking tone, man. ”  

“ that’s just the way he sounds, he has an asshole voice. ”

“ i’m gonna trust you. ”  

“ you know what happens when you do that to people? the moment they get a chance, they do it right back to you. ”

“ never killed anyone. ”  

“ pointing an unloaded gun at you was the closest i’ve ever come to being violent. ”

“ that’s my dicey-as-fuck plan. ”  

“ your dad’s kind of a pessimist. ”  

“ he’s not my dad. ”  

“ i’m not her dad. ”  

“ endure and survive. ”  

“ i wasn’t exactly telling you the truth, before. ”  

“ i am the bad guy because i did a bad guy thing. ”  

“ we’re not doing so good. ”  

“ have you been back to the room you grew up in? ”  

“ he would be horrified by the things i’ve done. ”  

“ this is what happens when you fuck with fate. ”  

“ are you ever scared? ”  

“ i’m scared all the time. ”  

“ i’m scared of ending up alone. ”  

“ if you turn into a monster, is it still you inside? ”  

“ stay awake with me. ”  

“ gimme the gun. ”  

“ what did i do? ”  

[schro4444]

About the Kaito keeping his secret ID through Refuge In Audacity do you think Conan stuck with his first guess that KID was younger than 20 or later dismissed it as KID wearing a mask? (Ik this isn't relevant to the kuroba sitcom but I had Ditto in the brain haha)

I personally hc that he logicked it away as "he can't be THAT young, learning all those skills he has would take time" and then Kaito TOLD HIM his mom was Phantom Lady who did crazy gymnastics so she couldn't have been very old and dissappeared a scant 20 years ago and Conan went "welp"

Ik that Hakuba figured KID's age through DNA and then compared to highschool databases across the country, but first that's not how DNA tests work, the length that tells how old someone is changes from person to person, and second, I'm not familiar w Japanese laws regarding privacy and DNA databases but I'm fairly sure that what Hakuba did was like. Super illegal. Probably why Hakuba hauled ass back to London after that case actually, I bet he only got away with it bc nepotism (IT'S SURE ILLEGAL IN THE UK)

I still rlly want to know if Hakuba sat KID down w an optometrist board and an IQ test though, HOW did he get that data. Like I bet Toichi and Chikage never even got Kaito tested bc they thought it funnier to keep people guessing just HOW smart he was, plus Kaito wanted to share class with Aoko and Nakamori wanted her to be in a class where she could make friends her age, and that was the end of the topic

(oh man this ended up long, MY BAD)

first of all, omg im honored, tysm for reading ditto :D <3

GREAT QUESTION I think conan kept it in mind, but became less sure of himself over time. conan/shinichi has a pretty skewed idea of what kids are capable of doing, and I think he knows this about himself, so it’s reasonable for him to think “...nah, it would be insane if a high schooler was doing all this… right?” and if he was basing his original age guess off of what he could see of kid’s face and body shape, well, he learned very quickly that kid can change any of those traits at any time. who’s to say that kid wasn’t wearing makeup/a mask/anything else that might change his silhouette? …left to his own devices for long enough, conan can become a victim of his own overthinking, lol.

aaaand then kaito dropped the Phantom Lady tidbit. that, if anything, seemed to me like a peace offering of some kind? possibly meant to even the playing field between them? as always, it’s hard to tell what shinichi and kaito actually Know in canon, though I’m of course personally a fan of them knowing the least amount of information possible while still being as intelligent as we know they are. because shenanigans >:D

if we want to have fun with it ;) , I think the phantom lady reveal only narrows down kid’s age to,,,,, younger than 30? ish? it mostly gives conan an upper limit, since he doesn’t know whether kid was born before or after her retirement, and she easily could’ve retired in her early 30s. what it Does confirm is that this kid isn’t the original one, but that only narrows his identity down to “probably a protege of kid #1.” from there, the biggest bit of provable evidence against kaito is that his father died right when the original kid disappeared, but that’s still a pretty big logic leap to make when you aren’t around kaito all the time (like hakuba is). and toichi had students, too! who knows who else he taught besides yukiko and sharon? who is more likely to be kaitou kid: an undercover protege of toichi’s, or his teenage son who has an alibi for multiple heists?

best I can tell from some brief research, in Japan, DNA collection isn’t regulated for law enforcement, but hakuba isn’t law enforcement, he’s a consultant at best. I think other DNA tests for ppl age 16+ require consent of the person, and 16 or younger require the consent of a parent. hakuba has NEITHER. hakuba was saved from being a juvenile criminal by nepotism and the fact that nakamori laughed in his face instead of charging him with obstruction of justice or something. and yeah, that’s Absolutely Not How DNA Tests Work adjfksjdj

FR THO!! now I’m imagining hakuba chasing kid through a museum yelling “WHAT NUMBER LOGICALLY FOLLOWS THE SERIES ACCORDING TO THE GIVEN PATTERN” while kid answers with, like, extremely confused perfect accuracy. “400 iq” honestly sounds more like something hakuba made up to explain the fact that kid could answer the iq test questions while rappelling down a skyscraper lol. and I totally agree, kaito’s probably never been officially tested—it’s important for kids to be with their peers, especially when you’re already likely to have child prodigy syndrome. also because kaito and aoko get along so well, they would run the risk of never making other friends (cough shinichi cough). plus, the kurobas probably like to avoid official records as much as possible, and scoring even in the 160+ range would gather attention that their family of internationally-wanted criminals does Not need

[hello-nichya-here]

Concerning Friends: With Chandler being your favourite, could you explain what draws you to him? What you find interesting in his character, in his development? Love hearing your takes on..well, literally everything 🤍

Gladly!

Chandler Bing Appreciation

Humor

The first thing that comes to my mind when I think of Chandler is "He's the funniest of the cast", and considering the competition he had, that's a pretty big accomplishment. I'm a sucker for sarcastic jokes, and Chandler was the king of it. I always liked how he could think of hilarious replies to literally everything everyone said so fast, and his way of delivering the jokes was so specific to him that even the show itself poked fun at it.

And I loved how, just like he was quick to make jokes at everyone else's expense, he also did it to himself, which showed both that he could take a joke AND that he was very insecure. To quote one of my favorite exchanges between him and Rachel (that I totally don't relate to on a spiritual level)

R: You should never be allowed to talk to people! C: I'm sure you're right, but why?!

Him being Joey's best friend also created a lot of naturally funny moments because Joey was way more confident, and far dumber, than Chandler, so one of them is always being the butt of a joke just by being next to the other.

I promise this whole thing won't be just quotes, but nothing better exemplifies what I mean quite like this bit of dialogue when they're discussing possibly having a threesome with a girl, and flipping a coin to decide on which end each will be:

J: What's heads and what's tails? C: If you don't know that, then I don't wanna do this with you.

But my absolute favorite thing about the jokes written for Chandler was that they often poked fun at the show itself, like him responding to Monica giving him a key to her appartment with "Door hasn't been locked in five years, but okay", or making fun of typical Ross and Rachel drama, or just point out how completely absurd some of the situations they got into was, like when Ross was murdering everyone's ears while playing bagpipes for Chandler and Monica's wedding.

M: Why is your family scottish? C: Why is your family Ross?

The guy also looked funny. I've seen one of the directors say Matthew was always aware of the camera, and it shows, because he is always doing something, even in the background, mainly funny faces to react to what the other five are doing. And that led to lots of improv on his part, and you can actually see some of the other actors breaking character in the background because they couldn't hold back the laughter.

His physical comedy was great, and nothing puts a smile on my face quite like seeing Chandler make a joke just a little bity funnier by jumping up when reacting to stuff, or doing a little dance out of the blue - or even better, reacting to stuff that was not supposed to happen. One of my favorite exemples of it in the whole show is him and Rachel (a criminally underused comedic duo of the show) in her office, with him trying to convince her to uncuff him after he hooked up with her boss, and Matthew's face just breaks me every single time I see it.

Combine his habit of playing off of EVERYTHING with the improvs both from him and co-stars, and you have little moments like this one in which Ross gets a call from his second (ex) wife and Matthew just reacts to David's improv on instinct, then doesn't know what to do next:

Seriously: could he be more iconic?

Trauma, Insecurities & Awkwardness

For all of his hilarity, Chandler also had quite a lot of emotional baggage that he often either refused to deal with or didn't know how to deal with.

His parents were a disaster, with the dad cheating, the mom hooking up with one of his friends when he was already very uncomfortable with how much he (and everyone) knew about her sex-life and sexual fantasies - to the point that Chandler legitimately thought it was normal for kids to have seen orgies - and, more importantly, he was told about ALL the drama of their messy divorce, and even at his wedding they were at each other's throats.

He went through a lot as a child and naturally that affected how he acted as an adult, making him a messy, flawed, sympathetic character. It was easy not to judge him too much for things like his deeply dysfunctional on-again off-again relationship with Janice, or the moments of immaturity/anxiety in his romance with Monica - especially because he did make progress and grew a lot.

But the dude was also a mess in other (deeply relatable) ways. He flew to Yemen to avoid telling his ex he didn't want to get back together. He lied to said ex about still having feelings for her/wanting to have an affair so she wouldn't show up at his wedding/move to the house next to his. He lied about not being able to come home and was actually gonna let Joey think Monica was cheating, just to not have to tell his best friend that he wanted to spend the night with his wife instead of hanging out. This man let a co-worker call him by the wrong name for months, got in the way of him getting a promotion, then helped the dude trash his office - all to avoid going through the awkwardness of correcting him.

There's a reason he said stuff like "What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?"

A Caring Friend

Even though Chandler didn't think very highly of himself, another thing that made him a personal favorite for me is that he clearly had a very kind, loving side.

He invited both of his parents to his wedding even after all the shit they pulled. His goodbye to Rachel at the end of the show broke my heart in a million little pieces because he was just so sweet to her. He and Joey were so close they were practically a couple, and when he fell for his girlfriend and kissed her, he not only confessed, he was willing to not go after her because he wanted to prove to Joey he'd never betray him again. There's also a "Joey room" in the house he and Monica bought at the end of the show.

Even though his romance with Janice was a mess, he was a really good boyfriend to her when she was leaving her husband for him - and then he stepped aside when Janice realized she still had feelings for the guy, so her kid would not grow up with two dysfunctional parents like he did.

Those moments made the character feel far more real and, once again, made it a lot easier for me to still feel a lot of sympathy for him even when he was in the wrong.

But come on. If we're REALLY gonna talk about Chandler's sweet, caring, understanding, mature side, we gotta talk about the person that brought it out the most.

Chandler & Monica

Mondler, Mondler, Mondler. The best couple on the show without a shadow of a doubt, and possibly one of the best sitcom couples in history. And it was the dynamic that allowed Chandler to develop as a character and let the qualities he already had be front and center in many episodes.

Before the writers even considered pairing them up, we already Chandler offer to be her boyfriend/husband and father of her kids later in life if she doesn't find someone. Monica is offended the first time because why wouldn't she have found someone by then, and in the second time she just laughs because, come on, they're friends, JUST friends????? It'd neeeeever happen.

Both are played for laughs (though Monica does let him try to win her over the second time), but they already highlight some very important things:

1 - Chandler cares so much about Monica that just saying "I'm sure you'll find someone eventually" isn't enough. He has to assure her that even if nothing goes according to plan, she'll still have someone to grow old with.

2 - As early as season one, Chandler already liked and trusted Monica enough that he was not at all hesitant to suggest "Hey, maybe you and I could get together in the future and even have kids." I remind you that at that point in the story Chandler had never so much as let one of his girlfriends have a drawer with their things in his home due to his fear of commitment, and he had assumed EVERY COUPLE broke up after their first fight because pretty much none of his previous relationships survived it (except Janice, but that was more of a "They DID break up, they just got back together later" kind of deal).

And that last point is really made it so easy for audiences to get attached to their romance - which was originally only going to last a couple of episodes! They were already super comfortable with each other and were clearly compatible, which allowed their relationship to progress without the need for the neverending drama, Ross and Rachel style.

Monica was neurotic, had a serious case of OCD, could be very bossy, often needed things done ONE way and one way only - which meant Chandler always knew where he stood with her. If something was wrong, she'd tell him. If she said she was happy and loved him, he could believe her more easily because she simply could not fake it when something was bothering her.

Much like Chandler, her family life was not at all ideal (due to her parents pretty openly liking Ross more than her) and she had tons of self-esteem issues (again, because of her parents and because she used to be overweight) - but she also take a joke, or at the very least, make fun of people right back. I think Chandler related to that.

And, more importantly, their friend group had not imploded after Ross and Rachel's relationship ended very badly, twice. So Chandler just knew that, even if he and Monica didn't work out, it wouldn't be the end of the world, or of their friendship.

It made perfect sense that lots of his typical paranoia didn't affect him as much during their relationship, because by that point he just knew that Monica would always be part of his life.

But the writers also didn't make the mistake of dropping his insecurities, anxiety and even immaturity completely. They came back every now then, sometimes for jokes, other times in a more serious way.

He can't bring himself to full on say that he wants them to be exclusive right away, got way too cocky about being the best sex she ever had and thus made her mad, assumed they'd break up after the first fight, nearly gave himself a heart-attack when he accidentally said "I love you", proposed to her because he wanted them to be on good terms after a fight but didn't know how to fix things without her guiding him, pretended to storm out in Vegas with an empty bag because he just wanted to be dramatic after a fight, and he almost didn't show up at their wedding.

The fact that the writers allowed to still have flaws, took the time to have him overcome said flaws and without being judgemental of him, like Monica was wasting her time with a total loser, is one of the reasons why his character development worked so well, and why I'll defend even the worst seasons of the show.

More importantly, despite the fact Monica is the one with the more experience on how to actually have a relationship, they also let Chandler be the one be the mature one every now and again, and talk sense into her when she's being unreasonable (like when she wanted to spend ALL the money he had saved for their future on their wedding alone).

I also really like how they have HIM taking the lead in some major events for their relationship, showing not just that he cares, but that he really is growing as a character and becoming more comfortable with being an equal in the relationship, instead of just needing Monica to guide/push him or just agreeing whenever she wants to takes things to the next level.

He is the one that decides they're still in "London time", the one to first say "I love you" (twice), the one to propose in Vegas and then start the conversation about whether they should really get married once they both think it over and are afraid they're rushing into it, the one to decide it's time for them to move in together, the one to propose for real (only took the writers five fucking tries to realize "Damn, maybe they SHOULD get married"), and while Monica says she wants a baby, she does it as a joke and it's Chandler who then brings up the subject seriously.

That last one also brings us one of the sweetest, saddest moments in the entire show. Them discovering they can't have kids, and Chandler making that whole speech to the mother of the baby they want to adopt that, when the time comes, he'll figure out how to be a dad, but Monica is already a mother - without a baby.

It just showed how much he loved her and how great of a partner he was, and it was FAR from being the one time in which they remain an loveable, interesting couple to watch post-marriage (seriously, it's crazy how Friends was THE show to get both a dramatic mess of a couple that can never reconciliate until the finale AND a stable couple that is just allowed to be happy together).

Chandler getting a look at what his life would be like if Monica left him when his boss is dragging him into his mid-life crisis. Monica being all excited to show him her new boots AND allow to actually guess what's changed about her look instead of doing the obligatory sitcom thing of "Wife gets mad at the husband for petty shit", and then Chandler carrying her on his back because said boots hurt her feet (then saying the other pair she wants to buy will cost her one husband, which always cracks me up). Chandler having to move to Tulsa because of his job, them missing each other like crazy, Chandler remaining faithful when another woman makes a move on him and quitting his job because he just wants to be with his wife, who is then super supportive of him when he's unsure of what to do in his professional life from then on - which of course, leads to this great joke.

M: I want you to have a job that you love, not statistical analysis and data reconfiguration. C: I quit and you learn what I do?

(And in case anyone is wondering, yes, I had to google what his job was because I forgot too)

They're simply an incredible couple that I would gladly watch doing the dishes together, and their relationship being so well-written was one of the best things that could have happened to Chandler's characterization because the show deconstructed and evolved it without betraying the core of who Chandler Bing was.

Also their romance led to the iconic episode of everyone finding out and messing with each other about it, and thus the scene of him and Phoebe trying to "seduce each other." I want to find the genius who wrote that scene in particular and send them a thank you card because it was the best thing in the whole world and I'll cherish it forever.

Matthew Perry, The Absolute Legend

Naturally, I have to end this post by remembering the guy that brought this amazing character to life.

Like I said before, he was always aware of the camera and making sure even the smallest reaction was funny for the audience. Like the other main actors, his charisma made good scenes great, and bad/mediocre scenes enjoyable - and whenever the script gave him something truly excellent to work with, he'd do it perfectly and make it all the more special.

He also stopped the writers from commiting THE biggest mistake they could have ever made: In the season 5 finale, after discovering Monica had lunch with her ex, he was supposed to cheat on her in Vegas, basically copying the Ross and Rachel break up drama of season 3. The actor asked them to change the script because he felt it would make everyone hate his character, sparing the audience of more unecessary drama and giving us the super cute almost-wedding in Vegas, that they chicken out of like two dorks, and then leads to them moving in together.

Matthew Perry was gave this role everything he had, even while going through really dark times, and in doing so he made millions of fans happy all over the world - and he'll be dearly missed.

[t00thpasteface]

How do you like the mash movie?

I saw the series first, my dad is a fan and we used to watch it together, and was surprised at its more serious tone. Frank Burns also struck me as also a pathetic idiot but in such a different way and also has these evil vibes. Because of you I discovered the books, got them, and im having even more shocks!

i fucking LOVED IT. i was absolutely HOWLING the entire time. my favorite bits were:

the opening where you see the dangling arms of the bodies in the choppers??? oh my god. i was like GASP. the insane blood and gore was awesome and really drove home how petty and wacky everyone's being

hawkeye's stupid tinted glasses and bucket hat <3 sooo 70s.

mulcahy getting immediately ignored the second he's introduced. mulcahy basically acting like a frightened mouse in every scene he has. he is so sad. he's really not cut out for this

frank being introduced as an aggressive bible thumper (very funny contrast to the likeable and shy priest) so him cheating on his wife with margaret, who is also married, is even funnier

radar(!!) being the one who puts the mic under frank and margaret's bed

mulcahy hearing them bang, leaning in bc he thinks it's a radio program he enjoys, and going D: when he Realizes

suicide is painless. holy shit. did you know a 14 y/o wrote the lyrics? his dad said "i needed the lyrics to be extremely stupid, and 14 year old boys are masters of stupidity." mom just learned that and has been telling all her 50-60 y/o friends. also both versions in the movie are sung beautifully (and thus hilariously)

the unbelievable fruitiness of hawkeye and trapper at all points but especially in the golf related scenes

trapper spawning the olives out of nowhere. player.placeatme olivejar 1

bring me the sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes! (dramatic zoom)

RADAR STEALING HENRY'S BLOOD??

hawkeye's entire interaction with painless just SCREAMING "chaotic bisexual who's been out the longest of anyone in the friendgroup and will forcefully yank you out of the closet the second you start questioning"

racists do not get dignified with a response. racists get shoved out of their chair

DON'T LET HIM KISS YOU HAWKEYE!

frank getting carted away in a straitjacket and never seen again

margaret hating the idea of football until the general wants it and suddenly she's a cheerleader with pigtails bc she's completely spineless. god she's so evil in this i LOVE horrible evil women. full agency at being the worst person ever <333 i support women's wrongs and i love watching chicks who are just slow-motion car crashes

"i was thinking we should have some plays, cause yknow, football teams always have plays" "actually i took the liberty of drawing about seven or eight plays for us to try ^_^" "great! ...what do these arrows mean?"

MASH EM! SMASH EM! KILL, KILL, KILL!

OH MY GOD THEY SHOT HIM!!!

hawkeye suddenly not wanting to leave once he's actually able to 🥺

end credits being read over the loudspeaker like the other movie night announcements. so. cute.

okay sorry. good movie. i had fun and cried laughing ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

[ecargmura]

Frieren: Beyond Journey's End Episode 22 Review - Intermission

The end of the first day exam means it’s an intermission episode. Frieren, Fern and Stark are reunited and have some fun together…and by fun, that means appeasing Fern’s bad mood by eating food. Yeah, they spend their break eating at a restaurant Frieren once ate at with her old party eighty years ago.

Not only does Frieren’s party have fun with their leisure time, the other exam participants have their fun too. It seems that friendships have been formed after the first exam with Denken’s team forming an unlikely friendship; I find the grandfather-granddaughter relationship between Denken and Laufen adorable. Richter seems like a chill guy when he’s off mage duty as he runs a magic tool repair shop. Despite Richter’s protests on not wanting to spend time with Denken, he does so. He even takes him to the restaurant that Denken really wanted to go to. I do like that Denken’s so chill and wise. He tells Richter that being a mage means being willing to mingle with others without regrets. When they saw Frieden’s group in the restaurant, he said to leave them alone to enjoy their meal. He’s so cool. I want to know more about him.

Ubel and Land develops an odd friendship too with Ubel seemingly being intrigued by Land but he could care less about her. It seems that Ubel’s magic is to be able to copy another person’s magic as she was able to copy Wirbel’s Sorganeil to bind Land. Ubel’s thought process is very unique as she thinks about murder and violence, but knows when to hold back because of empathy. I do feel like Ubel likes him. They’re constantly seen together in this episode, so who knows if the writers will push this ship. I find it quite intriguing.

Kanne and Lawine are still their usual self, but seeing the latter all dolled up was a nice sight to behold. Lawine has three older brothers who spoil her rotten. Seeing her mom join in on dressing her up felt like seeing my mom wanting to dress me up in nice feminine clothes. If you listen carefully, the music used during the rather romantic moment between the two ladies is the music played when Stark and Fern danced together in Episode 15. I chuckled when the music cut off just as the music was about to get to the highlight as Lawine pulls Kanne’s pigtails as always. I ship them as much as I ship Stark and Fern and Frieren and Himmel. Kanne even did the kneeling thing that Stark and Himmel did. Other than that, it was nice to see them hanging out with Frieren and Fern. They don’t have to be enemies in this moment of peace. They’re grateful towards Frieren for helping them pass and it’s nice to see Frieren reminisce about how helping someone can impact them, even if it’s just small gestures.

Wirbel and Scharf seem to be close friends. What’s even funnier is that they develop an odd friendship…with Stark of all people. While Stark was a bit uncomfortable being surrounded by girls, Wirbel came in at the right moment to take him away. It did look like he was hitting on him. I do wonder if Fern will have to worry about her potential love rivals as she’s gonna have to fend off both male and female suitors for Stark in the future. Stark does attract male attention, surprisingly.

The scenes with the hero’s party was nice! Seeing Frieren reminisce about the food she ate from the past and how kind actions can be instilled in people’s memories so that no one would be forgotten. I just feel like Frieren is learning more about people and it’s so nice to see.

The second day exam will start next episode and it’ll be proctored by Sense. She is notorious for not letting anyone pass the exams she proctored in the past four years. I do wonder what will happen this time around. Will she let people pass this time around? I can’t wait to see what the second exam has to offer. Which interactions were your favorite?

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

OC Questionnaire

Thanks to @illarian-rambling here and here, @somethingclevermahogony here and here, @mk-writes-stuff here, @imsoveryveryconfusedatlife here,

Rules: answer the questions for your OCs, then ask three more questions to others!

Tagging @blind-the-winds @little-peril-stories @buffythevampirelover @eccaiia @dyrewrites @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @willtheweaver @chauceryfairytales @reininginthefirewriting + ANYONE

These accidentally built up. Since I got tagged multiple times this may be a little long. I will do one OC per set.

#1- Robbie

What's your favorite type of weather?

“I mean, I guess I like it when it's cloudy, maybe even a bit gray. It feels cozy, I guess. Especially if it's cold, because then you have an excuse to stay inside.”

Who was the last person you told a secret to?

“Probably Akash. He knows my secrets better than me.”

Have you ever broken a bone?

“There was a ramp up to the playground in kindergarten, and I slipped and broke my arm on the ramp. It was the day before the talent show, so I had to go on stage with a cast.

More Robbie: OC in fifteen, OC in three, two truths and a lie, picrew

#2- Gwen

What's a childhood fear you had?

“I think it was...that I would one day find an evil clone of myself. Or a dark version of me. I guess it was all the cartoons I watched! (Laughs) I suppose those things happen a lot less in real life.”

What's in your pockets?

“My drumsticks. I developed a habit of twirling them when anxious or bored. Thankfully I've gotten boy's pants for years so I can have better pockets.”

Ever considered therapy?

I'm assuming this is post-Pt2

“What? No, I-- *sigh* I don't need therapy. I'm needed elsewhere.”

More Gwen: OC in three, picrew

#3- Maddie

Salty, spicy, or sweet?

“Spicy. I enjoy the risk.”

What is your favorite game or sport?

“Hm. Anything Mario related. But I'm really good at Mario Kart.”

What was the last thing you threw away?

“The instructions for the LEGO set I just built. The Batmobile, for the record.”

More Maddie: OC in three, picrew, two truths and a lie, filled in Bingo

#4- Noelle

What’s your favourite food?

“Saying I have a favorite food is ridiculous. It's food - if it's good, it's good. I guess anything my mom made. And I like to think my cooking is good. I like doing it at least. I couldn't pick a favorite.”

What’s the worst joke you’ve ever heard?

“Any that comes out of Robbie's mouth. (Pause) I think that was a little rude. Parker - he thinks he's a lot funnier than he is.”

If you could go anywhere in the world to visit, where would it be?

“I'd like to go wherever my dad is. Talk to him. See why he and my mom aren't together anymore.”

More Noelle: OC in fifteen, OC in three, filled in Bingo

#5- Jedi

What do you do for work?

“Oh, I love my work. I have a doctorate in the power database. I run constant tests on DNA from different Alii to compare their genetic makeup so the database remains accurate and thorough. I make notes of trends among the abilities of different Levels, as well as noting the subpowers, and how those subpowers look on a genetic Level. I am currently working with my dear friend Carmen to study the long-term effects of Alii who grew up on Ceteri, and how their powers develop throughout their adolescence.”

How much sleep do you get?

(pause, rubs the back of his neck) “I do have insomnia, so I get a normal amount of sleep for that. I may take medication to fall asleep occasionally, but I am usually reading or running diagnostic tests.”

What’s your favourite animal?

“I am particularly fond of kitsunes and water foxes. I also always wanted a pet ferretsnake, as well.”

More Jedi: OC in three, Picrew, acearo smash or pass

#6- Kelsey

Who would you miss the most if they left?

“Maddie. She's been my best friend for years. I wouldn't know what to do without her.”

What is the funniest thing you have ever done?

“Not check the bathroom stall lock in second grade. It's how I met Maddie though, so I'm grateful I did that. I also put on a handmade puppet play for my cousins a few years ago. Improvised the whole thing.”

Who cares about you the most?

“Maddie. And Hye-Jin. They've never stopped caring about me, even though they show it completely differently.”

More Kelsey: OC in three, picrew (now inaccurate since I'm dying her hair black), filled in Bingo

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

Alright, you've made it this far. Here are the questions:

What is on your nightstand? If you don't have a nightstand, what would you put on it if you did?

What are some of your hobbies?

What is your system for organization?

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls, Season 2, Episode 17, "Dead Uncles and Vegetables", Part 2

Read part 1 and all other episodes in my pinned post. Luke is giving Lorelai the run down on the Life and Death of Uncle Louie, which is terribly un important. Think it's funny that he doesn't tell Lorelai about the existence of his family members until there's a crisis like his uncle croaking. Lorelai didn't know he had a sister or nephew until Jess was practically on his doorstep. Frankly, the life story of Liz Danes is infinitely more fascinating than Dead Louie's. I have to make a small correction: in the previous post, I stated that Teach Me Tonight was the next episode, but there's actually another wonderful, glorious, absolutely pointless filler episode next. That one where Richard helps Rory with a project for the Chilton business fair and Madelyn invents the Amazon Alexa a full 12 years before Amazon does but Rory sidelines her invention because no one at Chilton knows how to build a robot.

I can't think of a more gruesome place to spend the afterlife. If I happened to die in The Hollow, I would come back and haunt you. I'm gonna haunt you so hard, Lorelai Gilmore. You, Dean. Boom, haunted.

A little healthy competition for Taylor Doose. Just a warmup before Walmart eventually moves in and flattens both markets.

Love Miss Patty. Back at the Inn, Michel notices the 9 rooms that Lorelai reserved for Luke but there is no credit card on file to pay for said rooms. What's that sound? Could it be the sound of Lorelai Gilmore’s gross financial irresponsibility? Could it be that Lorelai just gifted Luke 9 free hotel rooms with no way to make that money back for the Inn?

Ha!

To bring everyone up to speed on the low stakes drama currently under way: Sookie is planning her wedding, and after a fateful soup tasting, Emily has wormed her way in to the wedding planning. Lorelai is predictably miffed. I fear that a day without a Miffed Lorelai would throw the Earth off it's axis.

For at least the second time in so many weeks, Lorelai has just up and left work in the middle of the day to help Luke do something and no one tries to stop her, on top of that she is leaving her real job to go work another job filling in for Luke.

Lorelai Gilmore is an HR rep’s nightmare. Meanwhile at the diner: the war for small town economic dominance rages on between Taylor and the gentle farmer's market hippie, while Lorelai works behind the counter and Rory....

WHHHAAAAA???! First Rory paid for her food, now she's working.... a job??!

Gross. Kirk just ordered lunch, Lorelai is about to bring Luke a turkey burger, and another customer asked Lorelai if they were still serving breakfast, so are we to assume it’s like, around 11am? And Rory is not in school. My word! She pulled a Jess and skipped school to work! It's even funnier when you think about how Luke is basically nobody to Rory at this point but some dick her mom is quietly chasing and her mother pulls her out of school to wait tables at his restaurant. (before anyone says "maybe it's a weekend", Rory was in her Chilton uniform just moments ago). Taylor, observing Miss Patty across the street at the farmer's market: "Since when does Patty eat so much fruit?" This is the woman who told 15 year old Rory that plums were better than sex.

Taylor is quaking in his cardigan, he knows deep down that at any moment his power and stranglehold over Stars Hollow could be usurped in a blink. Hippie: My market is so busy I don't have time to take a break and eat a meal. Taylor: A well groomed businessman with a good staff can afford to take a break now and again. Kirk:

The exquisitely timed, deadpan delivery of this line delighted me #TomatosSign #KirkMayBeATouchNeurodivergent

In other Low Stakes Drama, Lorelai has gone upstairs to bring Luke his lunch. He informs Lorelai that none of his relatives are coming to Dead Louie’s funeral, and they both pretend to be sad about it. Jess is nowhere to be found, so I guess unlike Rory, he’s at school, not jerking off for once.

Luke laments the lame excuses that his no good relatives gave for skipping Dead Louie’s funeral, like “I can’t miss work.”

If only they had the generous “Leave work in the middle of a shift to go help the diner guy” PTO package that the Independence Inn provides to Lorelai.

Luke begins the ol’ “name and shame the family members who have stood me up” and to no one’s fucking surprise Liz is among the funeral skippers who isn’t answering his calls (and at the same time isn’t seizing this opportunity to visit her own son and brother).

Oh Liz Danes you are SO getting haunted.

Now this just throws more Confusion Dressing onto the Dead Uncles and Vegetables Salad. On top of the "Rory gets pulled out school to chase her mom's Dick Goals", Jess also isn’t at school, and Luke says he’s…playing basketball. Ha ha ha. From the fantastical imagination of one Miss AmyShermanPalladino, who bought us “Dean likes/knows how to read”, comes its thrilling sequel, “Jess plays sports!"

Okay. Okay. Nothing is as creative or fantastically fictional as “Dean being literate”. And that being said, I could see Jess shooting hoops, I guess? Like maybe he spent time at the parks and playgrounds of New York City to blow off a little steam. Maybe it’s not a terribly ridiculous notion.

Anyhow, much like “I was playing football with my friends” ala the big fat lie in Swan Song, Rory just accepts this statement without question and then calls him a "little punk". Why? The hell did he do? First ya'll are mad he's causing "mischief" and now he's found a wholesome activity to keep him occupied and off the mean streets of Stars Hollow and you're still mad.

That brown shirt looked fucking stellar on him and he had to go and ruin it with a poofy lifejacket. 2000's fashion, man. I love how there is clearly nothing for Jess to do plotwise so they made up this z-plot where Rory keeps getting mad at him for taking time off from work, as if it matters to her, and as if he doesn’t have the most solid work ethic in Stars Hollow and shouldn’t be allowed take a break and play his little basketball game if he wants.

The low stakes drama continues: Jackson shows up at the diner and is not pleased about the intrusion on his wedding…by his fiancée’s coworker’s mother, of all people. I’m sure he had a lot of questions for Sookie about that.

Poor Jess. I'm sure he tried so hard to hold onto that fleeting moment of bliss today, a brief time when he was free, playing basketball, by himself most likely, skipping school, no one bothering him, then Rory shows up and drags him back to work/home for some reason and then Luke forces him to go to a town meeting, He never even got any time to jerk off. I don't understand why Luke goes to these things. Clearly any time there is a meeting he is there not of his own free will, so what are the terrifying consequences for staying home?

Here sits a defeated man. Taylor: You're late Lorelai, I banged this meeting in a half hour ago. Lorelai: Ooh, dirty. Miss Patty's reaction:

Dirty old bat. I love her.

Das a good question.

Tell me again why he should care about The Town? Why should anyone care about The Town? Fuck Stars Hollow.

The many faces of Milo. What a cutiemuffin gumdrop. Ah the famous scene where many claim to see Milo mouthing "I love you" at Alexis across the seats, to me it just looks like he's chewing his lip. The way he is looking at her is incredibly precious and adoring nonetheless. Lord, I think I just popped an ovary. Ow. Camp I Love You, Camp Lip Chewer, I respect you both, now let's just meet in the middle where we can all agree Dean Forrester sucks. To be continued.