#It's because I'm a Masochist.

[shorelinnes]

skz: buzzfeed kitten interview teaser

[nerdishpursuits]

Fina's broken no puedo más and Marta's anguished mi amor

[humanitys-strongest-bamf]

[fazedlight]

💗 7 years of supercorp fics 💗

It's been a little over 7 years since Lena came into Kara's life. This immediately prompted the first supercorp fic and has led to tens of thousands more. Despite the show ending two years ago, supercorp has had some massive staying power (look at that trendline!) and become the biggest F/F ship on AO3.

Something tells me we're going to be creating for a good long time 💪(Including me. If you'd like, read my supercorptober ficlet-turned-oneshot, Echoes of the Forest!)

[anistarrose]

SO as an aromantic villain liker, I have to admit that whether aro or not, there's something compelling about Philip perhaps clinging to Caleb in part because of an alienation from the Other way of acquiring a Good God-Loving Family in his day and age. because if Caleb spurns their witch hunting dreams to go fall in love with a witch that's a perceived betrayal to Philip on two fronts, the witch sympathizing and the abandoning Philip for romance. it's compelling in a "Belos selectively ignores all the norms of his own oppressive belief system that he spurns, when he could have easily found a home amongst the freaks if he let go of his hate" way. it's compelling in an "adds even more parallels to Lilith, who avoids following his path, and shows that people who start in a similar place, with both genuine flaws and genuine instances of being wronged by the world, the latter not entirely unrelated to aromanticism, are still able to find joy instead of hatred, because aromanticism is not a destiny to endlessly suffer nor a destiny to do evil" kind of way.

BUT. unfortunately. I've seen way too many posts that just spew garbage like "Belos is evil because he's incapable of love, obviously! and the heroes are good and moral and (cough) not subhuman (cough) because they actually love people 🥰," just total horseshit right at the intersection of aphobia and ableism. just a total admission that they don't think love can ever motivate people to hurt anyone, that they don't think they can hurt anyone they love and no one they love could really hurt them, that love is a get out of jail free card when doing harm while harm is a get banned from love and humanity permanently card, so. basically, we can't have nice things.

[ineffable-gallimaufry]

ever crocheted something and said "wow i loved that but i sure wish every single stitch required me to stab myself in the finger!" ? think crochet is good but it just needs a bit more pain?

look no further than knitting, aka crochet for masochists! i can't understand why anyone would ever— *camera pans down to me knitting* you weren't supposed to see that

[lazyturtlehottub]

hello, it's me, your local clown clowning it up again

but imagine if we actually get to see a bucktommy wedding. if we get to see them decide to become parents. if we get to watch the growth of this queer relationship in the same way we saw maddie and chimney fall in love, and the way that we didn't with Hen and Karen

imagine how beautiful that would be

[melissa-leaf]

interview

Bonus: the genuine reaction in question

[k-martins]

I just wrote that Megumi is "A blessing in a world of curses" and I just feel like crying about it. Because he is! He is a kind and very hurt boy, who was only trying to protect those he loved, but ended up dooming himself and those around him. Megs just wanted to be with his sister, he just wanted to save Yuji, he just wanted to free Gojo and he is suffering from all of this. He should be living with his friends in a cheesy, adorable romcom, strolling through Shibuya after karaoke and exchanging dog keychains with Yuji, not sunk into the abyss. I hate you, Gege Akutami. You will pay for all this pain and suffering, you crazy cat with low self-esteem. T-T

[proffbon]

So I'm playing MysMe again.

[dyrewrites]

Seeing AI covers when looking at indie published ebooks makes me sad, not angry, but sad.

I want to tell authors that it's not so hard to make covers, that they can do this thing and make something eye-catching and interesting. They don't have to break the bank on a professional or resort to AI.

Then I remember I am an artist too and even though I don't consider myself very good at it, or anything near 'cover artist', there's skills there that make it easier for me.

So it is annoying trying to help in that regard.

Instead I say hop onto a site like Canva and see what you can come up with on your own. Study covers in the genre you're writing, to learn what 'design' screams your genre, and play around. Go take some photos to mess with, look into pre-made covers if you can find any not using AI (I could not tell in my searches), but don't despair because you can't art and can't afford an artist.

Anyone can be an artist, it really just takes practice.

What's important to know for covers, specifically, is readers need something that gives an idea of what's inside, it doesn't have to be perfect.

And remember, you can always re-release the book a few years down the line with a shiny new cover and some extra goodies...you know, when you've hopefully sold enough to afford it.

[riding-the-sunset-bird]

Drew fanart of @akiacia's MC Margaret Montgomery and @rui-drawsbox's MC Ruri Last because they make really great and funny art that I like very much~ >///<

Also, Baxter Ward Solidarity.

[humming-fly]

artfight season is around the corner so I've put together one of those funny little summary plate things I've seen floating around- if you're playing you can catch me at https://artfight.net/~Humming-fly! (and see the actual character refs i did not bother grabbing actual thumbnails for for this thing lol 👍)

As for alignments I actually like both teams this year so I'm planning to do a traitor run! So starting out in seafoam, and will swap over to stardust for the latter half, should be fun!

[buttercup-barf]

So, the teaser trailer for that new funny Oz* movie is coming out somewhere closer to this New Year's, and the actual movie will come out in early January of 2025.

Plenty of time for me to have Yet Another character arc about it.

*It's not really Oz, it's yet another adaptation of an adaptation, but I think the skeleton of it will remain similar enough (despite promises of plot changes), so... Western audiences might be bored and confused at worst.

[externalorgansinmyfreezer]

Thinking about Beyond Birthday. I have to have him in my clutches. Need him in my basement

[wuxian-vs-wangji]

What is your favorite sex scene in Love Sand? Can you do an exceept??

Ooo...

My favorite is one that probably would be bad for excerpts, because it's actually a SA scene.

Before you think I'm a psycho, hear me out:

Khom falls in love with Conner, constantly fighting against this insecurity eating away at his mind that he's just a slut. Connor asks Khom to come back to Bangkok with him, Khom is absolutely elated, then Connor says Khom would be his personal whore (well, not exactly, but basically the deal Tongrak offers Mahasamut, except Khom would live separately).

Khom's world shatters, he runs away, Connor leaves, and Khom is severely beaten and outed as gay to the island, while the locals just watch him get beaten half to death.

Khom wakes in Mahasamut's shack, is terrified of how his parents will treat him, and flees to college. But he is still terrified, all the stress plus people just watching what happened, it drives him crazy. He's terrified of his own phone, of footsteps in the hall, etc.

He thinks at least getting past Connor will help, so he joins basically Grindr, meets a dude who is nothing like his profile picture, and is nearly assaulted before Connor shows up, hauls him to a room, and then they have extremely rough sex with extremely dubious consent bc Khom agrees to be his whore and no longer believes he has any right to consent or not.

The next day, he's exhausted, in pain mentally and physically, makes the trip to Bangkok, is left alone as Connor rushes to work at dawn after they arrive, and neither eats nor properly sleeps for at that point 2 full days. He also doesn't believe he has any right to anything he isn't directly and expressly given. So Khom doesn't bathe, doesn't eat, doesn't touch the TV or grab a blanket. He only curls up on the couch where Connor told him he could sit and lays there all day, crying.

The whole situation kind of gnaws at Connor all day. He can see Khom is much thinner than before, and there is a hollowness in his eyes. When he gets home and finds Khom curled up in a ball in the dark, he realizes Khom hasn't eaten or slept. And he knows it's in part because of his words before, how his Sugar Daddy offer was construed. Connor can see that Khom is falling apart mentally and physically, and feels extreme guilt.

He intends to spoil Khom as much as he can, heal his psyche, and clarify that he never thought of Khom as a whore or a possession. He had a place arranged for Khom (by Tongrak) in a university to help respect his desire for an education, wanted him to have his own space that was his alone (so a dorm was arranged), and basically Connor wanted to bring him to Bangkok so they could date.

But he fucked up on the island with the way he proposed the arrangement, and how that crashed into his and Khom's darker sexual dynamic, how Khom was internalizing his dirty talk instead of considering it just part of the sex acts.

Connor takes Khom out for a big dinner, buys him food (he already explained Khom has a right to anything in his home, including food, but he wants to give Khom food directly too so Khom sees it as 'his').

He also intends to explain, once Khom has a chance to actually sleep, what he really meant by the deal and that he doesn't see Khom as a sex toy.

But when they get back from dinner, he hands Khom a wad of cash (The intention is to give Khom some freedom to travel around Bangkok and explore the city, go to museums, cafes, etc.).

But giving Khom that cash only makes Khom think that is Connor paying him for his body.

So Khom forces himself to walk to Connor's room, strips, and even though his body is still in pain from the night Connor found him at the hotel, he chokes back a sob and tells Connor to get his money's worth.

Connor is horrified, but Khom won't listen to his explanations and keeps cutting off his attempts to speak. It makes Connor feel like some disgusting asshole, and makes Khom feel like worthless trash as he repeatedly begs Connor to use him until he feels like he has his money's worth.

Eventually, Connor loses his patience and forces Khom to roughly finger himself, even though Khom is so exhausted and sad and broken that he can't get hard.

Connor forces a TOE into Khom, and the pain does work (Khom is a masochist, make no mistake). Then, Connor starts roughly fingering Khom, Khom breaks down sobbing and tries to escape, but Connor forces him along until he cums. Connor is disgusted with himself throughout the whole thing. He punches the pillow next to Khom's head while Khom keeps sobbing, and leaves him there on stained sheets all night.

Connor is furious with himself for doing that to Khom and still failing to explain himself for every misunderstanding, and Khom is thoroughly broken after that. For Khom, the sobbing was because of the disgust in Connor's eyes. It was self-loathing, but Khom thinks it was directed at him. And for Connor, he is still disgusted with himself the next day and how he made Khom cry so horribly.

Khom already feels like he has no home because of his parents finding out he's gay (Mahasamut is smoothing things over on the island, not that Khom knows bc boy won't answer calls), and he both feels like he is dying being near Connor, and like he can't survive without Connor. He is absolutely terrified of being thrown out on the street.

So the scene is a complete shattering of Khom, and after that Connor is absolutely determined to fix things and be a better person. He makes sure Khom has more and more agency, brings him anything he could ever want (Khom was a wicked sweet tooth), and spends a month refusing to touch Khom sexually. In general, he won't touch Khom without direct permission, and always makes it very clear that Khom has the right to say no.

But that night is still very much a trauma for Khom, and Connor is still terrified of seeing that sadness in Khom's eyes. So he doesn't explain himself still. He decides he will show his sincerity through action (he does eventually explain everything).

And when they do have sex again, even though Khom is a masochist and by then really very ready for the rough and wonderfully painful sex they both love (Khom often refers to it in the novel as being a thrilling kind of violent), Connor is only agonizingly gentle and sweet to him. The softest vanilla sex he can possibly give Khom.

But I really love the darkness of the scene on the bed because of how many layers of things are happening to each of them psychologically, and how Khom is absolutely shattering mentally and emotionally.

It is such a well written scene, even with the horrible stuff happening, and sets it up for the back half of the story being Connor trying to pull the pieces of Khom back together and own up to the shit he's caused. A lot of the techniques Connor employs are ones you're supposed to use to help people recovered from captivity or abuse, and it was interesting to see that as part of rebuilding Khom.

So just because I don't think I've ever seen so much meaning and character development put into a scene, even though it breaks your heart, it's my favorite.